#but insane to do if you are playing an entirely different system
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When talking about DnD and TTRPGs, the thing that immediately tells me I should not take someone seriously is if they say something along the lines of "typical 5e player behavior"
say what you want about 5th edition Dungeons and Dragons, it has some problems, all systems do. I really like playing other systems myself and think learning multiple is fun and can be an enriching experience, but talking about typical 5e players is such a bad faith take
Mostly it's just "not like other girls" or i guess "not like other Table Top Player" reactivism to the popular thing. But also it always seems to be about stuff I've literally never seen a normal 5e player do. Like, the concept of the "that guy" has been around for ages. This isn't a new thing or limited to 5e, the only reason you see so many is that idiots are loud and noticeable and 5e is incredibly popular.
rant over, yes there was a post and some of the replies prompted this, no it was not even about 5e DnD yet people were commenting about typical 5e player behavior. Sometimes a bad player is just a bad player
#it was the post about the guy trying to play a half elf druid in a VtM game#which according to the guy who initially commented about it would probably have been 3.5 DnD the guy would have been using#also a three page backstory set in the forgotten realms which is also just bad DnD etiquette if you aren't playing in that setting#but insane to do if you are playing an entirely different system#dnd#ttrpg#ttrpg community#just me rambling into the void#it just rubs me wrong to generalize and entire group for stuff that is not particularly common in that group
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Cat hybrid reader going through her first heat after taking heat suppresent pills all her life with werewolf husband(NSFW obv). This sounds kinda cute in my head.... I can't explain it.... Like getting married and then finally deciding that you want to let yourself go through a natural process which you were suppressing all your life.
Happy 5k! If this isn't something you'll write, I am sorry, please do not block me, I can't tell if this is following the rules or not.
Your husband held your hand as you started the morning without taking your heat suppressant pill for the first time.
You wanted to have kittens with him so badly, and he wanted to fuck you full of pups, so the two of you decided that it was beast for you to temporarily stop taking them so you could mate properly.
“You think it’ll be okay?” he asked, his thumb rubbing the back of your hand.
You frowned, leaning against him. “I’m not sure… it’ll take a few days for the suppressant to leave my system. I’ll find out then…”
And find out you did.
Your husband returned home after a long day of work, only for his cock to immediately strain against his pants when he picked up the smell of your heat. He could hear your desperate little mews from the bedroom, walking in to see you crying and begging for release.
You had never felt such an ache in your cunt, and had never really felt the urge to masturbate so you had no idea what to do. He watched you struggle to finger yourself and play with your clit, your pretty kitty tail rubbing against your fat, wet pussy.
“Poor baby, can’t even make herself cum…”
He fucked his fingers into you, making your back arch. “Mmph! P-please, need more!”
You panted, your body feeling like it was on fire. His fingers were a little help, but it was like throwing a bucket of water on a house fire.
You needed more.
“Shh, sweetheart. Gotta stretch you out, okay? Can you be my good girl and wait for me?”
He moved his fingers in a scissoring motion, trying his best to stretch you out as quickly as possible.
You nearly lost it when you felt him kiss your inner thigh, his lips moving to your fat pussy. He licked your clit, sucking on it as his fingers kept fucking into you.
After a few moments you cried out, cumming on his fingers and writhing on the bed. Orgasming while in heat was like nothing you’d ever felt before!
Your entire body spasmed as he pulled out his fingers from your aching pussy with a wet squelch. It took him a second to compose himself, watching your pussy ooze. There was a mess under your hips already, and your scent alone was driving him insane!
He already towered over you, but now he seemed to loom over your body like a predator ready to pounce on its prey.
He rolled you onto your fat tummy, lifting your hips so he could properly mount you. By now, he was going off of pure instinct, ready to breed his fertile little mate.
“Mew…”
You let out a pathetic little meow as he sunk into you. The two of you had sex before, but now it was an entirely different experience.
The pleasure was multiplied tenfold, and he was so much more intense than he had been previously. “Wanna make puppies with you! W-wanna-!”
You buried your face into the pillow as he pounded your kitty cunt. His grip on your tail made you cry out, arching your back so he could reach you better.
Your hips and legs were easily lifted off the bed as he began using your fat pussy to get off, his mind fat gone. You didn’t mind, the feeling of him knotting you and filling your belly with cum over and over again was the only thing helping to calm the heat in your body.
The next day, your mate fussed over you, feeling terrible that he went overboard and lost control.
“I’m sorry, little one… your heat, it just-“
You butted your head against him affectionately, purring as he began to pet you.
“I think it’s what I needed… thank you for being with me for my first heat.”
“Of course… I’m your husband and mate, it’s my responsibility to take care of you.”
The two of you spent the morning cuddling in bed, soft purrs and loving mews filling the air.
——————
NSFW TAGLIST: @sunset-214 @screaming-crying-screamingagain @strawberrypoundtown @avalordream @icommitwarcrimes @bazpire @im-eating-rn @anglingforlevels @kinshenewa @pasteldaze @j3llyphisching @unforgettablewhvre @yoongiigolden @peachesdabunny @murder-hobo @leiselotte @misswonderfrojustice @dij-ology @i8kaeya @lollboogurl @h3110-dar1in9 @keikokashi @aliceattheart @mssmil3y @spicyspicyliving @namjoons-t1ddies @izarosf1833 @healanette @lem-hhn @spufflepuff @honey-crypt @karljr
#cw breeding#werewolf x reader#werewolf imagine#werewolf knot#werewolf smut#werewolf boyfriend#werewolf husband#monster fucker#monster lover#monster fudger#monster boyfriend#monster fic#chubby!reader#chubby reader#x reader#fem reader#female reader#monster imagine#monster boy oc#monster smut#cat hybrid smut#cat hybrid!reader#teratophillia#teraphilia#terat0philliac#terato#exophelia#fat reader#plus size reader#ask answered
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How do you think Alastor would react to being called cute, hot etc.along those lines
Like how would it make him feel? Pre-Wifey. Like it’s Wifey, but she ain’t wifey yet lol
Wifey rizzing up her man??? 👀
Alastor X Reader Headcanons
✅️Romantic
❌️Platonic
TW: Alastor being TORTURED, Reader has that WIFE energy, Alastor thinks about killing someone
Description: ☝️⬆️
Alastor was a confident man who prided himself on not being taken unawares by anything or anyone
The keyword is was
But meeting you and getting to know you has completely caught him off guard because he's FALLING for you
He knew you were a dangerous woman, but he didn't realize just what sort of danger he was in
In danger of losing his HEART~
He couldn't help it, you were beautiful and witty along with a number of other fantastic qualities/talents
And when you smiled at him it made him freeze in his tracks, even the simplest eye contact made him feel flushed
But then you opened your mouth and actually spoke to him which made things so much more difficult
"You look good today, Alastor~ Did you do something different? Very debonair~"
He wonders if you're torturing him like this on purpose, if you know how he feels about you
But he does his best to remain unfazed, or at least not let you see how your words affect him
"I can't say I've done anything new, but I appreciate that someone around here notices my good looks~"
Your soft laugh makes his heart skip a beat, and he almost blushes when your fingers play with the ends of his hair
"I always notice you, Alastor."
He's at least able to wait until you leave the room to suddenly collapse on a table, steam coming out of his ears as he clutches at his chest
He would be insanely jealous if you acted this way with anyone else but you seem to reserve it all for him, something he's secretly grateful for
Even when you're drunk, you always seem to find a way to make him fluster
Alastor finds you at the bar, cheeks pink from the alcohol in your system, talking to the bartender about something
Or someone
"-he's just so handsome..! I can't get over it-"
Alastor takes a seat next to you, cutting off some random guy from taking the seat in hopes of getting an easy mark out of you
"Who's handsome now?"
He's totally not asking because he's jealous, or trying to figure out who he's going to hunt down and ki-
You hiccup and give him a drunken smile, leaning in to get in his face, which immediately makes his heart race
"You are~ Hand...some~"
Alastor can feel the heat rushing up to his face as you poke his nose before clumsily leaning back to get your drink
Okay, you've definitely had enough to drink
"I think you've had enough for tonight, let's get you home, my dear."
You whine and pout as he drags you out of the bar, only complying when he wraps an arm around your waist to keep you steady
He hopes that you're too drunk to remember the way he blushes the entire way home with you, holding you tight
It doesn't help that you're so snuggly when you're drunk, nuzzling your head under his chin
He almost explodes when he manages to pry you off of him and lay you down on your bed only for you to stare at him with glassy eyes
"Mm...that's hot...you're so hot~"
He rubs his hand over his face in an effort to hide the embarrassing choked sound that escapes him
"Please... just go to sleep..."
He's less sure that you're messing with him when you say things like that while drunk out of your mind
Your worst attacks are the sneak attacks that come out of nowhere for him, making it painfully obvious how much he feels for you
He's eating when you suddenly come in, rolling your eyes as you sit next to him, listening to all the little noises he makes as he eats
He can't help it, the food is delicious~
You suddenly grab a napkin and dab the corner of his mouth, giving him a small smile
"You're cute, you know that?"
He almost chokes on his food, your words along with the physical touch making his mind go blank
"C-cute!?"
Fuck, his voice cracked, making him blush uncontrollably as you obviously try not to laugh at him
"Ahem! Cute is not a proper word to describe me, I am many things, but cute isn't one of them..!"
You take his plate away from him, helping yourself to his meal as he rants about how he's not cute
"Say what you will, but I think you're a very cute man~"
He just groans and lays his head on the table, openly blushing now as he watches you eat
"I'm not... cute..."
You just laugh at him and it makes his heart beat a little faster despite his visible pouting
You're an evil woman who's torturing him for falling for you, trying to make him confess so you can tease him about it
He's sure of it...but it doesn't diminish his growing feelings for you any less
This one was so fun 😭
#hazbin hotel x reader#alastor hazbin hotel x reader#alastor hazbin x reader#alastor x reader#hazbin x reader
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⟡˖ ࣪ A Dripping Inconvenience ⟡˖
✬ Kinktober Day 3 ⟢ Eric Draven ⟢ Squirting/Overstim ✬
Warnings: Brother’s bestfriend troupe, size difference, fingering, pussy eating, pet names, choking, overstimulation, squirting, cock piercings, hickies, possessiveness, AU(no Shelly/crow), biting, a tiny bit of blood, reader has nipple piercings 18+MDNI
You spent most of the day cleaning your brother’s dirty ass apartment while he was out of town so you had absolutely no reservations about helping yourself to a fat plate of nachos from his kitchen and a blunt, or two, from his stash. You were one blunt, half a plate of nachos, and two episodes into your show when abrupt banging on the door ripped you from your chill evening. You practically jump out of your skin at the amount of force behind the knocks, the weed in your system making you slightly paranoid until you hear the voice behind the door.
“Chance, come on, man!! I really need your fucking help!” You’d recognize your brother’s best friend’s voice anywhere. Considering you were just a little bit obsessed with him. And he sounds extremely stressed. Another round of knocks pulls you from your thoughts and has you shooting to your feet so you can walk the short distance between the couch and the door. You hastily unlock and open it to reveal a disheveled looking Eric Draven. His black mullet is even messier than usual and dripping wet from the storm raging outside. Which makes the fact that all he’s wearing is a distressed black tee and even more distressed black jeans borderline insane as the cloth covering his body drips onto the carpet in the hallway. He’s panting heavily and the look in his eyes is the one of someone running from something. Fear and urgency. “Oh, fuck. What’re you doing here? Where’s your brother?”
You’re not taken back by his brash tone, Eric had always been short and avoidant with you. You’re his best friend’s annoying little, kid sister that used to beg to play with them and that’s all you’ll ever be to him. Fucking unfortunately. But the way he towers over you makes you suddenly acutely aware of the fact that all you’re wearing is a tiny, white, Hello Kitty tank top, even tinier pink panties that hardly cover your hips or ass, and your black platform Uggs with white ruffle socks. You took a shower after you finished cleaning and despite the amount of time you spent vacuuming, your brother's floors were perpetually disgusting so you refused to walk around in his house without some kind of shoes.
“He’s out of town, I’m house sitting and watching the dogs.” You scoff and roll your eyes before tipping your head over your shoulder to gesture inside toward your brother’s two dogs standing guard behind you. If they hadn’t known Eric their whole lives they’d probably be barking their heads off right now. “What are you doing here? Are you good?”
“Not fucking really, no.” Eric sighs and throws his head back while running his tattooed hands down his face. He drops them to his side before locking eyes with you and you have to physically stop yourself from clenching your thighs from the way he is glowering down at you. When you were kids he was shorter than most of the other boys and now his body fills the entire length of the doorway he’s standing in. He was just so big. “I just really needed to talk to your brother, alright? And it’s just really inconvenient that you’re here right now.”
“Seriously? What is your fucking problem with me, Eric? We aren’t little kids anymore. It’s just immature at this point.” You stomp your foot for emphasis and glare up at him with your lips set into an ironic pout considering you just called him immature.
“My problem?” Eric crowds your space even further and you can nearly feel the dampness of his clothes against your body from his proximity. He leans down until his face is mere inches from yours, his green eyes ablaze as he breathes out deep through his nostrils. “Is that I’m in some deep shit. I have some fucked people after me. You being here, near me, puts you in harm's way and that isn’t going to work for me.”
“That isn’t going to work for you? You’re joking, right? You don’t give a fuck about me.” You laugh dryly and shake your head at the irony of this entire situation.
“See, that’s where you’re wrong.” Eric closes the remaining distance between you, pressing his wet body against your barely covered skin. “I give too many fucks about you and now you’re here, looking up at me in that annoyed way you always do.” He chuckles and one of his large hands reaches up to cup the side of your face. “You think it hides how badly you want me, but it doesn’t.”
“W- What?” You gasp at the feeling of his skin on yours. He’s been close to you before, but never like this. “I don’t -“
“Shh. Let’s not waste time denying it. The fact that you want me is as clear as the sky being blue.” Eric’s thumb reaches out to trace along your bottom limp and you have to hold in a whimper. “It's only ever made it harder for me to be a good friend to your brother and stay away from you. I think my final restraint might be slipping. Fucking look at you.”
“You should… come in?” Your voice comes out a squeaky whisper and it makes you want to crawl in a hole and die. A slow smile spreads across Eric’s face, he places his hands on your hips and starts to back step you into the apartment before kicking the door shut behind him. The minute it’s shut his lips are on yours in a kiss that makes your entire body ignite with fire. His grip on your hips tightens as he pulls your much smaller frame taunt against his own. His tongue explores your mouth and you moan into him while you start to subconsciously grind down on his thigh. Eric kisses you for what feels like an eternity before grabbing onto your hair at the nape of your neck and using it to pull your head back.
“I won’t be gentle. I’m really stressed the fuck out right now and I don’t have it in me to take my time with you.” Eric’s free hand grips onto your ass so tight his finger nails dig into your flesh as he continues to yank your hair. The stinging pains make you moan and grind down on him harder. “Oh? Is that how you like it, brat?” The condescending nickname he called you growing up held an entirely different meaning as it fell from his lips now. It makes your pussy clench around nothing as the wetness in your underwear grows. “Answer me.”
“Yes, fuck. I like it rough.” At that Eric circles an arm around your waist and throws you over his shoulder. He carries you over to the couch and tosses you down on it onto your back. He stands over you with an almost carnivorous look in his eyes as he takes you in. You’re so fucking perfect that he can’t stand it. Your brother told him around the time you all hit puberty to stay the absolute fuck away from you but looking down at you in your tiny pink thong and tight little hello kitty tank top has him practically forgetting who your brother even is. Especially when you throw one of your legs over the back of the couch, revealing the large wet spot between them. “Take your stress out on me, I can take it.”
“Oh, I don’t think you know what you’re asking for princess, but your wish is my command.” Eric licks his lips before leaning down between your legs to kiss you like a man starved. His mouth tastes like cigarettes and rain and something almost sweet that must be naturally Eric. It’s everything you ever dreamed of as his big hands travel all over your body. He yanks your hair, grips onto your throat, runs his hands down your chest and grabs your tits and squeezes your nipples while he ruts his hard Jean covered cock against you. He bites down on your lip so hard you feel when the skin breaks and you can taste the crimson drip into both your mouths. Eric licks across your lips and down your chin to your pulse point where he sucks over and over again until your neck is covered in pretty purple and red bruises that will soon turn green and blue.
“You’re fucking, mine. Your blood is mine, your body is mine.” Eric kisses down your chest and pushes your shirt up to reveal your pretty pierced tits that make him groan at the sight. He tells you how pretty they are as he licks and sucks across them, marking them up just like your neck. He continues down your body until he gets to the band of your panties and he licks across it before kissing down your mound and running the flat of his tongue along your lace covered slit. “This pussy is fucking mine. Say it.”
“Fuck, my pussy is yours, Eric. I’ve always been yours.” He practically growls at that before pushing your panties to the side and smacking his hand down on your sopping cunt. “Shit!”
“Your pussy is so fucking pretty.” He lands a second smack on your clit before pressing the heel of his palm down on it and toying at your entrance with two of his thick fingers. “You look so tight though, we’re going to have to stretch you out, if you’re going to be able to take me.”
“I think I can take it - oh fuck!” Eric plunges his fingers knuckle deep inside you and your wet walls suck him in. Your back arches off the couch but his knee comes up to pin your thigh so you can’t move. His free hand reaches for his belt and undoes his pants enough to pull his cock free, the sight of it makes your jaw drop. It’s fucking huge. Thick, long and slightly curved, the head is perfect and dripping with precum, and best of all? The entire fucking length of his shaft is pierced. Maybe you do need him to stretch you out after all.
“Yeah, not so cocky now, huh?” Eric chuckles as he curls his fingers inside you and continues to grind his palm against your aching clit. He caresses your g-spot and rubs the tips of fingers along your walls before thrusting them in and out of you brutally quick. Your pussy is so wet it squelches and your juices start to drip down your thighs. Eric leans down and takes your clit in his mouth and it has your eyes rolling back. Your entire body stiffens as pleasure overtakes you. He keeps sucking your clit hard until your orgasm finally wavers but he doesn’t stop. The flat of his tongue licks your bud firmly as he twists his wrist and scissors his fingers inside you causing you to come again immediately.
He finally pulls his mouth off of you and you feel like you can breathe for a moment. That is until you look down at him. His hair is a disaster from you yanking on it and the entire bottom half of his face is covered in your creamy juices. Eric leans in to kiss you, giving you a taste of yourself. “You’re such a good girl for me. Give me another one.” He doesn’t pull his fingers from you and fuck you like you’d hoped he would but he resumes thrusting them in and out of you at a brutal pace and your pussy juices drip down his wrist and onto the couch.
“Oh my fucking god! I don’t think I can - fuck I just - I need a minute-“ Your sentence is cut short when Eric’s hand flies out to grip onto your throat.
“Oh, baby, no. You’re going to come for me as many times as I say and then I’ll finally give you my cock and you’ll come on that too.” Eric chuckles as squeezes your throat as he fucks you with his long fingers. His thumb reaches out to caress your clit and euphoria washes over you again. “Yeah, that’s it, you’re so good for me, Angel.”
“I - it’s so good, too good, I don’t think I can come again - oh fuck!” Eric’s grip leaves your throat and grips under your ass to tilt your hips up off the couch making his fingers hit deeper inside you.
“Shhh, just come for me.” He spreads them and twists his wrist before going back to the quick drive of his digits inside you. He spits on your clit before pressing hard on it with his thumb and your walls pulse around him as cum floods from your pussy. You squirt around his fingers and he doesn’t stop his assault on your pussy until you squirt two more times for him. Your chest is heaving and your entire body is shaking by the time he finally pulls his fingers from inside you and uses your juices to lube up his fat cock. “You were such a good girl for me, now lay back and take my cock like the good little fuck doll I always wanted.”
Tagging some fellow Eric lovers: @babygorewhore @cxrrodedcoffin @myherometalhead @that-sarcastic-writer @ghoul-friendz @taintandviolent 🖤
#Dolly writes#Dolly’s kinktober#kinktober#Eric Draven#eric draven 2024#bill skarsgard#bill skarsgård#eric draven smut#eric draven fanfiction#eric draven x reader#eric draven x you#bill skarsgard fanfiction#bill skarsgard smut#bill skarsgard x reader
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guys, please read at your own discretion (i mean it's not something too different from the usual nsfw content i write, it's just that reader touches herself to the thought of aemond and maybe some people can feel uncomfortable, i don't know, i'm a bit shy as i post this)
modern!aemond targaryen x fem!reader, smut <333
aemond targaryen drives you insane.
he's- he's been on your mind since you got home.
fuck him.
no, that's- that's not what you want.
you just want him to shut the fuck up for only a minute, stop talking, stop saying what he thinks on something that matters too little for the philosophy class. stop trying to impress the professor. stop knowing everything. stop smirking when he gets something right. stop blinking those pretty eyes looking at the book, stop-
he needs to stop before you lose your mind.
you throw your bag on the floor, your messed up room can take a bit more mess because you're not gonna clean it today. not now. your blood's boiling, a thin layer of sweat forms on your hairline. taking off your clothes harshly, you put them on the floor, too.
feeling the cold bed sheets against your hot skin is nice. you close your eyes. calm down. stop going crazy over a man. over this man at least. he's pretentious, he's literally the devil himself sometimes, an insufferable prick. you should dislike him with your entire being.
you should.
the thing is- he's too pretty to be disliked.
you put your hand on your belly. fuck aemond targaryen. fuck his piercing blue gaze, his stupid flowy hair, his perfectly sculpted jawline. one time you saw his bare chest when he was at the training with the team. so fuck his statue-like physique. his abs. his happy trail and-
you need to get over it. you need to. it makes you feel like a fool every time you see him at school. every time when he sits next to you in class. you don't know if you hate him or if you're crazy for him. this is madness. stop thinking about him. stop.
you rub the soft skin of your hip bone. only wearing your panties, it'd be so easy to- but no. not when he's on your mind. squirming helplessly on bed, you move your legs. it's just- just for once. you can promise yourself to never do that again. oh.
sliding your hand inside your panties slowly, you find yourself wet. of course. he's an overachiever even now when he's turning you on, and he's not even here. your free hand plays with your nipple briefly. your entire body feels like it's on fire.
your hand goes down just a bit. you spread the wetness nicely, a shaky breath comes out of your lips. just this time. you need it for the peace of your mind. you'll get him out of your system after you finish. it's just a secret to keep for yourself.
you start rubbing your clit, it feels so nice. you need to be touched, your fingers move on the nub to find a good angle. you can never reach too far with your fingers when you try to stimulate yourself from inside, only managed to come from touching your g-spot once. it never happened again and it frustrates you more when you can't do it by yourself.
you go with the way you like. your eyes closed, your free hand thrown over your head. you move your hips to meet your two fingers, stroking the bundle of nerves. it's okay. you're doing okay. you can imagine him. it's gonna be okay.
his face flashes in your mind. that beautiful smile when he gets something right. oh, those pretty lips curving so nicely when the professor gives him a praise. you smile. why is he so pretty? it's not fair. he'd smile against your skin if he'd be here right now. he'd tell you how good you're doing for him. he looks like the type of guy who talks during sex. he practically never shuts up in class, why would he be silent when he gets you like this?
"there you go." he'd say, his voice low. "touch yourself for me. look at how wet you are, and i haven't even done anything." arrogant jerk. you keep rubbing your clit. almost there.
you think of his hands. the prominent veins showing when he holds his pen too tight. one time he held the door open for you, his hand all spread on the surface, long fingers and clean nails. he looks so clean, so put together. his fingers are definitely longer than yours. you imagine he'd knew how to fuck you with them the way you want.
"please." you whisper against nothing. you're in control yet it feels like you're not. "more. more."
you lift your hips, roll them on bed to meet your fingertips. the wetness is too much suddenly but you can't help yourself. it's the sweetest part, you're almost there. this madness will disappear. you need something- more. something to press harder. you'll lose your mind.
the sudden urge gets you and you take your pillow. putting it between your legs, you start humping. almost ashamed, but there's no reason. you need this. "come on, be a good girl. almost there, such a pretty baby. oh no, are you crying? what's there to cry, you silly girl, no, you can't stop, i told you to keep going."
his voice. fuck his voice. you press yourself harder, two fingers squeezed between the pillow and your body to keep rubbing your clit. come on, come on. you're going insane. he drives you insane. "oh!" you say, can't help yourself. "yes. yes." counting down the seconds.
and then- the tight bubble finally snaps. "aemond!" you whisper desperately. "oh, aemond- fuck." you slide yourself on the pillow, trying to last a bit longer. you hum, satisfied, the orgasm tiring you and clearing your head at the same time. you keep your eyes closed, he's right there. he gives you a proud smile. you've done so well. your back arches like a cat finally, one last movement on the pillow. it's over.
your body falls on the bed. opening your eyes, you see the room has darkened. your tired hand stays limp on your belly, the used pillow is still between your legs. you gotta clean yourself. you gotta drink some water.
you think it's over, this weird feeling you have for your rival. out of your system. your mind can function properly now. it's all okay.
your phone beeps with new messages.
aemond targaryen: hey
aemond targaryen: i was wondering if you'd like to be partners for the next philosophy assignment
aemond targaryen: i have an idea, i think you'll love it
fuck.
#aemond targaryen#aemond targaryen x reader#house of the dragon#aemond x you#aemond x reader#modern!aemond#hotd#aemond one eye#aemond targaryen x you#aemond targaryen x female reader#aemond targaryen x fem!reader#aemond targaryen smut#aemond x fem!reader#aemond targaryen fic#aemond targaryen fanfic#aemond targaryen fanfiction#aemond targaryen imagine#house targaryen#hotd aemond#house of the dragon fic#house of the dragon fanfic#house of the dragon fanfiction#house of the dragon imagine
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okay so… I’m crying!
like. my tv is pauses right now because I’m crying and digesting that entire scene between zeus, poseidon, and percy because that was KILLER. like genuinely in terms of acting and writing that was such an astounding four minutes of television.
first off, rest in peace to lance reddick and a round of applause for his CHILLING performance. he plays zeus with such a perfect level of intentionality that even to see zeus be thrown off for a second is just barely noticeable. the temper, the control he exhibits in jumping between very different levels of emotion, it’s so insane. truly insane walker was keeping on par with an actor like that. and of course, then, with tont stephens himself. and poseidon’s entrance? LET’S TALK ABOUT IT.
to see poseidon, a proud species of god, jump in and immediately surrender to zeus ALL FOR PERCY is just… picture that. picture the father you’ve never met, who you’ve been wondering about your entire life. picture fearing he’s the worst man you’ve ever met, picture resenting him for adhering to a system you can see clearly as loveless and problematic but still having this weird complicated love for him because you just want to know where you come from. and the first thing you ever hear him say is, softly and to protect you, “I surrender.”
to put away pride like that, to let love win… the gods fail at that consistently, but he doesn’t in that moment. and so many details of this scene are absolutely perfect and that isn’t even an exaggeration. poseidon mentioning how percy’s inherited his rebellious streak from him because the sea doesn’t like to be contained. sally having taught percy ancient greek, and poseidon being not at all surprised— and, in that, the subtle recognition that sally did raise him and teach him everything. and then: the first question you ever get to ask your father? “do you dream about mom.” ARE YOU JOKING??? and poseidon need only smile, because the answer is obviously yes even though we don’t hear him say it.
I’m floored. honestly.
#abby liveblogs#pjo#pjo spoilers#percy jackson spoilers#percy jackson#percy jackon and the olympians#poseidon#zeus#sally jackson#walker scobell#lance reddick#toby stephens
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Erasermic family general hcs:
- when shinsou has bad dreams or intrusive memories of his time in the system it’s hizashi he goes to, not shouta, because even though hizashi was only in the system a short while he understands what Hitoshi went through and how it feels to be abandoned and not know what to do with all the emotions that comes with it.
- eri used to be terrified on present mic. Not of Yamada hizashi, the sweet guy who signs as he talks and makes her chamomile tea when she can’t sleep, but of present mic who looks like a huge flightless bird and squaks weird slang all the time. The fear was fixed when she saw hizashi undergoing the transformation process one day.
- hizashi and shinsou have developed their own ‘sign slang’. As the ones who’ve used it most throughout their lives and with someone new to try it out with they started making their own signs for internet catch phrases and swear words and it pisses Aizawa off so much that he’s left out of the loop. This, in turn, only further encourages shinsou and hizashi to the point where half the time they’re not even making sense to each other but just gesturing randomly whenever shoutas around to piss him off.
- I’m pretty sure it’s canon that hizashi has, like, no nostrils (or maybe really really small ones) on account of his quirk as stoping airflow through your nose means you can make louder vocalisations, so, although everyone thinks mic would be the only one who can cook between him and Aizawa, the two of the basically function as two halves of the same idiot in the kitchen. Since your sense of smell makes up about 70% of your taste buds, despite hizashi enjoying cooking and be able to follow a recipe, without shouta there to taste test, hizashi’s cooking becomes absolutely repulsive and he has no idea. Shouta on the other hand, is perfectly capable of cooking but just refuses to learn because he thinks the system they have worked out now is perfectly functional.
- the first time hizashi is left to cook for Hitoshi alone during one of his early visits, he suffers such a culinary disaster since shouta wasn’t there to supervise. Mic makes sure to tell Hitoshi to tell him if it’s nice or not but the kid is far too polite for that and struggles through 2/3 of the meal that is somehow both sour and salty while also being so fucking spicy that Hitoshi thinks his ears are bleeding before Aizawa comes home and picks something off hizashis plate and immediately tells mic it’s the most disgusting thing he’s ever made and throwing out the entire meal. Hitoshi is absolutely flabbergasted, tears streaming, nose running, throat retching, as yamada and Aizawa both ask him why the fuck he didn’t say something.
- mic likes pretty much every type of music and has sampled practically every genre ever made and since eri has never had the chance to develop her own taste, he takes her on the axact same journey of self discovery. Eri ends up very similar to mic in that she likes a lot of different things but her absolute favourite genre ends up being ‘kawaii metal’ which mic and Hitoshi both find hilarious and let her play it all the time which Aizawa (who only ever listens to brown noise) absolutely fucking hates.
- Aizawa can’t drive. Like at all. He never learnt, never even took any lessons, never had any interest in it. Mic is older than him by a few months and got his lisence super quick and after that Aizawa decided he would never need to learn because he would always have hizashi to chauffeur him around.
- mic doesn’t get angry much so everyone thinks shouta is the scary one but the more you get to know Aizawa the more of a softy he becomes. Mic, on the other hand, is fucking terrifying when you piss him off. Hitoshi and eri have only ever seen it once when some bitch from Hitoshi’s old home ran into them and got mouthy. He’s the quiet anger type that just just radiates insane unpresidented rage and Aizawa finds it incredibly sexy.
- eri is the kind of kid who collects bugs from the garden and spends hours watching them crawl over her hands in absolute amazement because she’s never seen so many of them before. As we all know, mic is terrified of bugs, but eri did not know this until she invited all her little creepy crawly friends into the house for move night. Cue them all cuddled up on the couch one day when mic feels something crawling over his legs. At first he thinks it’s Aizawa as his legs draped over his lap and tells him to cut it out and Aizawa is like ‘huh?’, looks down, and sees the fattest, juiciest cockroach ever on yamadas leg. Aizawa, who also doesn’t really like bugs all that much, is like “zashi, do not fucking move” and eri catches on, turns around and is like “oh! Patrick is here” which makes mic finally notice and release the most deafening scream ever and jumps five ft into the air which knocks a sleeping Hitoshi to the floor who wakes up face to face with a massive fucking spider and joins yamada in the screaming match while Aizawa is using his quirk on mic so none of them go deaf while climbing the furniture to avoid all the bugs and screaming for everyone to calm down in an uncharacteristically high voice while eri just sits on the floor amongst the chaos like “I just wanted you guys to meet my friends”. The house gets fumigated after that.
#eri mha#mha#my hero academia#mha headcanons#erasermic family#erasermic#eraserhead#aizawa shouta#yamada hizashi#shinsou hitoshi#bnha#boku no hero fanfic#boku no hero acedamia#erasermic hcs#erasermic family hcs
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INANIMATE INSANITY SEASON 2 EPISODE 15 SPOILERS. PLEAASE GO WATCH IT
Omgaaa I need to EXPLODE cuz of Taco’s Tirade. Gonna go on a rant analysing it prty much line-by-line so STRAP IN!! (Shout out to everyone who worked on this masterpiece omfg)
It starts off with what might be considered ‘normal’ Taco. Her making fun of the contestants. There is a little bit of hinting at her sympathy towards the contestants, although it’s incredibly shrouded in her mastermind facade. Calling them ‘pathetic’ and comparing them to blindly obedient dogs with ‘how they run to fetch their sticks.’
We get a little bit more with ‘Sure, call me polemic, unsympathetic.’ It shows how shes aware that she’s a problem, although at this point in the song it’s unclear to the audience whether she’s saying it in a way of ‘yeah call me it cuz it’s true, I don’t care.’ Or if it’s ���call me these things, yeah, but I’m more than that.’
‘Look at me and all you see is the debris of some defective outcast.’ Feels like it’s getting into the meat of the song, and the episode as a whole, of how Taco has realized how she’s pushed everyone away for the sake of the game. The fact she has her arms tucked away during it gives another interesting interpretation, of it actually talking about before her big reveal, and how she was treated differently because she was, in her words, ‘defective.’
‘A frenetic, antithetic (if poetic) iconoclast.’ Frenetic means wild and energetic, probably, again, referring to her season 1 persona. Antithetic means opposite of something, and iconoclast means someone who attacks cherished institutions. This gets into her want to tear this entire show to the ground for the suffering it’s caused everyone.
‘I wont live in the past. I almost won this game once, you know.’ I’m just gonna parrot what @lemonxlimee said cuz they put it pretty succinctly with two words. Taco. Girl.
Then we get to the lines that got me started on this tirade (Pun intended.) ‘History is rearranged just to credit those who win the glory. So reality has changed in the edit when they spin the story.’ AUGH. Her fucking staring down at the hotel made of the money she spent SO HARD and lost SO MUCH to try and get. I. I want to scream about this. I don’t know how to put my thoughts on this line into fucking words.
‘And we choose to feel this pain.’ Going off the last line, Taco, out of almost anyone in the cast, knows how much you have to go through just to get a chance to win, which goes right into the next line.
‘We lose more than we gain.’ She lost Pickle. You might say that she didn’t actually care, but I’m not sure if I believe that. I feel like she might not have at first, and maybe even never when they actually were playing together. But you can’t convince me she doesn’t hate herself for using him on a plan that resulted in nothing. She also lost Mic, and it’s incredibly clear how much that affected her. That was the straw that broke the camel’s back, and showed her the flaws in this system.
‘I will break this cycle of mistakes unlike all of these snakes whom I call to condemn.’ She is fucking DETERMINED to make everyone see what they’ve sacrificed. She speaks with a level of contempt towards them, yes, but I feel like it’s more her projecting her feelings about the contest onto the contestants.
Then we’ve got MePad being best therapy boy. ‘You are incapable of starting over.’ She wants to be better. But she doesn’t feel worthy.
And then MePad’s slightly naive optimism with ‘I do not know who you lost, but is it not possible to get them back?’ He’s programmed to see the best in everyone. He wants things to work out. He doesn’t see how hard it might be to just make things better after a relationship exclusively built on lies.
This naivete is immediately contrasted by Taco’s all-encompassing pessimism. ‘Clear the slate, start again, do you hear how preposterous that sounds? How do you not comprehend that for someone with my monstrous background, the whole slate has fallen apart.’ To Taco, the bridges between her and Mic or Pickle are nothing but smoldering piles of rubble after all the pain she’s put them through.
This contrast is even more stark with the duet of ‘It’s too late’ and ‘It’s not too late.’ I don’t even know what to say about that, it’s pretty black and white.
For the duet, gonna go one character at a time for simplicity. Starting with Taco.
We see taco’s turmoiled feelings on whether she’s to blame, with ‘It’s not I, it’s they who deigned to play.’ Even after all of this internal conflict and deep personal realizations, there’s still a part of her that wants to cast the blame of the pain she’s caused onto the ones she’s hurt.
Another deflection she throws out is, honestly, probably more fair, if still not great. ‘This game, so cruel and inhumane, base and uncouth.’ This really gets into her main philosophy for the episode. She’s afraid to take responsibility, and pins the blame on the show for pitting everyone against one another. I want to make it clear, her point is incredibly valid. We see during THIS EPISODE how much it turns people against eachother. The challenge is entirely built around making the contestants spill their true feelings about each other, and using that to fuel drama. Suitcase literally has to choose between two people she cares about over who she’s bringing into the finals, pitting Baseball and Knife against eachother. While the show is ‘cruel and inhumane’, I don’t think that should just be a het out of jail free card for Taco. Yes, she did it because she felt there was no other choice to win, but she still did horrible things. She manipulated 2 people into actually believing she cared.
‘They’re too afraid to bear the bed they made, can’t bring themselves to face the awful truth.’ This is pretty much just her saying that the other contestants are too blind to see how much pain they’ve gone through to get to where they are.
NOW. Baby boy therapist, MePad.
‘You’re no menace, Taco, how did they hurt you?’ He agrees with Taco on the grounds of how much pain the contestants go through, but he’s just a little more concerned about the tact needed to show them. He knows that Taco wants to change, but she’s afraid to. He knows how much she wants to apologize to the people she’s hurt. He feels that there has to be something external she’s dealing with to have this level of spite in her, even if there isn’t, and all of her hate is towards herself.
‘Please think this through’ is pretty self explanatory. As I said, he agrees with Taco about her basic ideals, but feels like there are better ways to deal with the issue.
‘Feeling double crossed is part of dealing with the loss, yes, but the healing is a process, that’s the truth.’ He wants to see Taco get better, and he’s trying to get through to her about the fact that her feelings are entirely valid, but she has to, at some point, let go.
I also feel like the sound mixing is very purposeful. Taco’s voice rings through clearly, able to be heard without much difficulty. MePad’s vocals are softer, and a little quieter and harder to make out. Taco is so in her own head about the pain she’s gone through, she refuses to listen to any outside voice.
Then we get to Taco trying her best to cover up her emotions again and put on her mastermind persona with ‘I’m turning up the heat to sauté, I’ve some beef to get grilled. But I guarantee that today all the beans that get spilled won’t be mine.’ I love how this foreshadows the challenge, but doesn’t make it obvious.
We see one last crack in her facade in the penultimate ‘I’m fine.’ Again, the ‘mistake’ in this line feels incredibly purposeful. It’s incredibly pitchy and bad, to an almost ear-splitting level. Taco knows she isn’t actually okay at ALL, and has trouble telling such a blatant lie.
And then the last line, ‘now it’s time’, is her fully donning the mask once again, ready to expose the show for what it is.
ANYWAY. Uh. Thanks for reading all this bs. I fucking love this song so much, and I think Taco’s motivation in this episode is fascinating. Any comments or constructive criticism of my analysis is MORE than appreciated, hope you all have a wonderful day/night/whenever.
#inanimate insanity#taco ii#taco inanimate insanity#ii spoilers#ii 15#object shows#ii mepad#mepad#inanimate insanity mepad#taco tirade
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CASINOOOOOO FICCCCCCCCCC (pt.1)
ITS HEREEEEEEEEEE
good morning and merry Christmas my fellow obsessed fans of this lovely wee series we have here, I grant to youse, as a Christmas present, the first Half (or so) of the casino fic. It’s got insanity, it’s got scheming, and it’s got a buggerton of innuendo. What more could you want?
so anyways, wherever you are in the world, with family or friends or perhaps by yourself, have a merry Christmas, Ido’nai, Hanukkah, Sanguinalia, or whatever you choose to celebrate. That’s enough rambling in my part. Enjoy gang.
Authors notes: in this the AU emerald city fiasco happens before semperternity. And the Zero is waiting somewhere else. So the squad is flush with cash but still without direction. This will be fun.
Tyler:
“What do you mean it’s missing a piece?” Cat looked about ready to murder someone, most likely Aurora. I laid a hand on her shoulder, very much ready to stop her acting on her fury.
“I can feel it. It’s broken. Look at the eye on this compared to the drawing.” Aurora pointed at the trigger sitting on top of the console to the picture of the sigil she had unconsciously scrawled. She was right. It was missing the gem in its eye.
Finian leant back against the bridge bulkhead, exo whining as he did so “good news gang! I have a cousin who just so happens to deal in missing parts of random artifacts from an ancient race of aliens.”
“Really?” The question slipped out before I could stop it. Finian looked at me like at me like I had just asked why we couldn’t open a window in the longbow, “No golden boy. Did the GIA give you concussion or am I losing my touch?”
“I would bet that ty lost more braincells from my punch then you ever had numbnuts.” Cat ground out. Finian raised his eyebrows “Nice one dirtgirl, I’ll have to add that to my collection.”
Zila sat, sucking on a lick of hair for a moment, tapping furiously at her uniglass. “I have found the missing piece. Its location was detailed in the data left in the safe deposit box.”
Every person on the bridge whirled around to look at her. “Unfortunately, it is in the vault of La Casio Royale, in Neomonoco. However, currently, the Time to the Line race is on in the system, so it will be slightly easier to sneak in.”
I drummed my fingers on the armrest of my chair. “I feel like there’s something missing here”
Finian rubbed his temples, “yeah golden boy, there is. If you thought biatchiis security was bad, the Vaults de la Royale makes his look like a play pretend cash register.”
Scarlett:
On one hand, I had always wanted to see the time to the line race, preferably from a luxury yacht, waited on by a small army of very handsome men all named christoff. But in the other: we now had to pull off a heist that made that whole business on semperternity look like taking candy from a baby. The entire vault was open to vacuum, with electrified walls, laser sensors, shelves that weighed each lockbox sensitive to .00003 grams.
But on the other other hand: I got to put on my best outfit and lie, gamble, and drink my way through la Casio Royale, the best establishment in the galaxy for the sins of greed and gluttony.
Needless to say, I had my work cut out for me getting my squad mates up to par.
Once we had landed our (heavily disguised) longbow, we made our way to an incredibly expensive apartment complex. Zila had a set of keys and guided us to a door labeled 312. We stepped in and were all floored by the opulence. Oak paneling lined the walls. Onyx tiling led the way to the central living area, with a colossal window and balcony overlooking the ocean of the planet. The legion clearly hadn’t skimped out when building this place. I still couldn’t wrap my head around how they had laid all of this out. The box, the camouflage unit on the longbow, this apartment. It was as if they knew what was going to happen before it did.
There were 6 doors leading off the main corridor. Each one was inscribed with a different sigil. One had seven lines, the next had a stylized double A, after that was two hoops. Then on the other side of the hall was another four, with a beetle, a handbag, a gold bar, and a phoenix.
I took a wild guess, and opened the door with a handbag on it. Inside I found a lavishly decorated room, all velvet carpet and silk sheets. The largest bed I had ever seen sat in the middle, and directly across from the door to the room was a massive ornate closet. I gently stepped over to it, and found it was full to the brim with an incredible selection of clothes. Worksuits hung next to ball gowns, and everything in between.
There was two doors, I opened the first one and found a bathroom filled with enough marble to have depleted a small quarry. High end toiletries were arraigned next to glass sinks. I then check the other door, and found myself in a small corridor, with another door on the other end. I closed the door behind me and opened the next one.
I found myself transported to trask. A low ceiling studded with stalactites. Gently glowing blue vines grew on the walls, and floating in the center, quite possibly the best part of the room, was one Finian De Karen De Seel.
Aurora:
I opened the door with the old logo of Ad Astra, and I found myself in my childhood bedroom. It was the exact same. From the crappy old wooden bedframe to the books laid about the place. On the bedside table was a note.
Aurora:
We are so sorry that this is what you have to do. You should have been welcomed into this new time, not forced to run.
Please consider this to be some very small apology,
Aurora Legion command
Admiral Adams and Greater Clan Battle Leader De Stoy
Below the message a small chip was taped. I plugged it into Magellan and saw it was a video. I pressed play and saw Callie, though much older, mid thirties at least, carrying a toddler. “Look the the camera kiddo! Say hello to your auntie Auri! Can you say hello little Jie?”
The toddler seem more focused on its mother bracelets.
“Hi Auri. I know you won’t ever see this, but I like to keep you updated. Even though you’re gone. This is Jie-lin. She’s 2 years old now. I hope you’re safe wherever you are. I love you”
I couldn’t keep it together. I broke down. These past few days coupled with this just broke me. I started bawling. Ugly, broken sobs that scratched at my throat as they came up.
I stared at that final frame of Callie. So grown up, so much older than me. I wondered what had happened. To mom, to dad, to the family after I left. Did mom go back to school? Did Callie ever go and see Hong Kong like she always wanted? What happened to dad?
I was stirred from my thoughts by one of the doors to my room creaking open. What would have once led to the kitchen now opened up into a plain grey corridor, currently occupied by the galaxies greatest Legolas lookalike.
We locked eyes for a moment. I saw that wall behind his eyes crumble for just a moment. I saw concern, but it could have well been pity.
“What…” my voice, scratchy and raw, caught in my throat “what do you want?”
Those damned purple eyes flicked away from me. And over the rest of the room, almost drinking it in. He stepped past the doorway, closing the door behind him without a south, and dropped noiselessly into a position with his legs crossed under him.
“Strong and silent then. Ok Legolas.” I mumbled, reaching around for something to throw at him. I grabbed my pillow, and acting on instinct from something I’d done a million times before, chucked it. He caught it out of mid air without a flinch. He raised a single, immaculate silver eyebrow at me.
“Stop doing that you son of a biscuit!”
“Stop what?”
“Being so irritating and rude and annoying and cute - er.. uh…”
Both his eyebrows jumped up to his forehead and I saw the faintest glimmer of what could be hope in his eyes.
Tyler:
Everyone else filtered off to their rooms, leaving one door unopened. As I opened the door I found a nice, it not ostentatious bedroom. Nicer than my room at the academy, but not what I would have expected from such a fancy apartment. Honestly I preferred it. I was never truly at home in fancy places, even when my dad traveled for the senate and took me and scar with me. It was always too much.
There were three other doors than the one I had just entered. The first was open to a bathroom, the second was a glass balcony door, that had a stunning view of the ocean.
The third door was closed, and had no obvious labels or indications of its purpose. I stepped over to it, and opened it only to find myself with scarcely four centimetres away from Cat. She looked up at me, and for just a moment I was there again, on shore leave, scotch in our veins and together. I staggered backwards, overwhelmed by that closeness with her. My ace, my closest friend, my confidante.
“Come now Ty, I’m not that scary”
“No-no god no of course not Cat no. You just…. Scared me.”
“Heh. And I never broke any academy regs. You’re fooling nobody Tyler.”
She lifted a hand, and with it a bottle of Terran scotch.
“We’ve made enough bad decisions in the past few days to fill a lifetime. What’s one more?”
And honestly? I couldn’t argue with that.
“So do you want to shout at me first or can we skip to the fun part?”
The now setting sun glowed a gorgeous golden orange through the light, catching in her dark hair and lighting up her face, now covered in a smile.
“Are you having a laugh? Nah. You’re going to sit your ass in the seat over there, and we are going to talk this out while I partake in this fine bottle of scotch that was left in my room. After that? We’ll see.”
By the time she had finished shouting at me, the sun was gone. In its stead was twin moons, visibly moving across the sky. We were sitting out on the balcony. She had a glass with a triple shot of scotch, I had some mineral water.
“Ya know Ty? I honestly considered the GIA’s offer on semperternity.”
“Is that the booze talking or you?”
“Are you having a laugh? I’m as sober as a funeral. This stuff” she shook the glass “is about as weak as nuns piss.”
“I figured. On both counts I mean. At risk of sounding uncomfortably cliche, I had faith that even though you wanted the offer, you would still back me.”
“God I hate when you read me like a book.”
“What can I say? I know you too well.”
A glint in her eyes made me realize what I had just done.
“Oh really now Ty? Are you sure? Cause I think there might be a few things you don’t know.”
And with that, I was dragged back through the door and onto the bed.
Cat Brannock 1, Tyler Jones 0
Zila:
There was a large amount of data stored on several storage wafers in my room. Each one contained briefings, plans, and other such information. Most was time locked to future dates, but I located one unlocked folder. Within was two subfolders, labeled ‘Orders’ and ‘Blue Prints’
The orders folder contain a briefing document with a security clearance I did not recognize. It was inaccessible, presumably corrupted, as it was date locked several hundred years in the past, and yet could not be opened.
The Blue prints folder was much more fruitful. Within was pages upon pages of plans, analysis, and photos of the vault we had to crack into.
Along with data was a note, one of several I had found so far. This one read “trust the hawk”. I piled it with the other notes, some had been helpful, pointing me to guide my team mates in the correct direction. Others were much more cryptic, many mentioning hawks, crystals, and the ancient myth of Ouroboros.
More to consider.
I wonder if it is wrong to manipulate my teammates.
I am still not feeling nothing
Finian
I spent most of the evening after Scarlett left fixing up my exosuit. The fact the legion splurged for terrestrial anti grav made feel warm and fuzzy inside. Or maybe that was talking to Scar. Who knows?
After an extremely long and deep sleep in zero G, I woke at would be 8:30 station time. Later than normal but not ridiculously so. With a sigh and some grumbling I donned my exo once again and turned off the Zero G. All of those pains and aches I thought had gone? They came right back. Turns out there’s only so much one nights sleep can do.
I opened the door and wandered out to the common area of the apartment, to find Zila sitting at the counter, obsessing over some file in her uniglass, and Kal out on the balcony doing some sort of meditation.
“Third awake isn’t bad… where’s our high and mighty squad leader?”
“Sleeping with legionnaire Brannock.”
I did a double take at that “asleep? Or…. The other thing?”
Zila didn’t respond.
“Maker… really? My goodness he’s actually human? I thought they assembled him at the overachiever factory.”
“There is no such factory.”
“Don’t change Zila. I need someone to tell me these things”
With that I wandered over to the refrigerator to see what we had. I found it stocked better than I could have hoped. It even had my favorite kind of breakfast burrito.
“Wow, they really did think of everything.”
Zila made a small noise, then hurriedly typed something on her uni.
At that, as if on cue, Scarlett walked round the corner. Far from her usual put-togetherness, she looked bedraggled, hair frizzy and makeup smeared. Even then though, as she caught my eye and winked, I felt like my stomach was full of butterflies.
“Morning Zila”
No response, Zila being a conversationalist ad always.
“And good morning fin”
The gentle smile, the way she said my name… it felt like someone had released another crate of butterflies in my stomach (why do they keep dumping them there? Do I look like a bug enclosure?)
“M-Morning Scar”
She walked over, brushed my hand (for just a little too long to be accidental) to hit a button on the coffee maker. I personally couldn’t stand the stuff, but Scarlett seemed to guzzle it like air.
“Any plans for the day?”
“You know, the usual, being the most handsome member of the squad.”
“The usual indeed. You can multitask while doing that I presume? I have a shopping list and need a spare set of hands getting it all. We can get lunch and such. I know a guy here.”
There was quite a few things to unpack there. First was her agreeing with me? The most handsome? Maker that let off a third… flock? Collection? Swarm? Of butterflies. The second… was she was asking me to go out with her. To go shopping and get lunch. Me. ME. The only reason she would pick me for that is if-
Great maker in the heavens. Scarlett Jones was asking me out on a date.
Tyler
The sunlight streaming through my window gently brought me back from the sandman. I stirred and moved my arm to my eye, only for it to hit something warm, and vaguely soft and-
Oh yeah. Last night. The memories flashed though my head like a dying star. I cracked an eye open, and saw her there, next to me, still dead to the world.
Her hair was mussed, what little makeup she had smudged around. I shifted under the covers and gasped from the pain. Looks like I might have voided the warranty on the old fun factory.
The noise woke her up. With a grumble and yawn, she opened her eyes. Her voice was soft and scratchy, but no surprises there. Thank the maker the walls are thick.
“Morning Ty. What’s the big idea with all the noise?”
“The boys…. Poor fellas seem to have taken a beating”
“Wonder who could have done such a thing?”
With that, she shifted closer to me and closed
her eyes again.
Should I have done this? Probably no.
Was it a bad choice? Most likely.
Do I regret it? Let’s see.
I looked over at the clock at the side of the bed, 6:50. Later then I would normally wake up. I should probably get up.
However: this bed was comfy, and most importantly, there was a woman I loved next to me, and that was too much of a problem for the little bit of me that wanted to get up could overcome, and so I drifted back off to dream land, listening to Cats breath.
Kal:
I awoke at 5 AM ship time. My father had instilled this into me with his fists. I always woke at 5 now, no matter when or where I slept. I still have the scars, the last reminders of the wounds he inflicted, and the care my mother gave me. The universe truly was cruel. Making me the son of that wretched being, and taking my mother from me because of his fit of rage.
I went out to the balcony, to meditate as my mother showed me. It helped clear my head, and to tamp down the enemy within. I cleared my mind and reached out. My powers were weak, insignificant compared to all but the weakest of waywalkers, and yet i could still feel my comrades, ever so faintly. Tyler’s golden light, lighting him up like a beacon in the dark. Scarlett, glowing ruby red, casting a warm and welcoming glow around her. And Aurora. By all the souls of Syldra, Aurora.
She was like a star. Glowing with the purest white light, too strong to even look at. All I could see was her outline, and that void blue core of her being.
I was no stranger to being pulled in two different directions. The teachings of my father versus those of my mother. The enemy within versus me. But this one was different. One could fill the galaxy with words and it would not come close. If all the blood vessels were laid out to end to end, and each cell had the word love engraved on it, it would not equal one billionth of a second of the pull. It was nearly impossible to resist, myriad works of art had been created about it over the millennia. None came close to describing it. I opened my eyes from my meditation, and looked out over the glistening sea, utterly stunning by all accounts. It was bland and boring compared to Aurora. And yet, I was denied such a thing. I could not. Alas, she was human. I don’t know if she could even reciprocate these feelings.
That was until yesterday. Like a man clutching to a cliff edge, I hung on to those words. Was there hope? Did she mean those words? Those feelings flying off her like a star going supernova?
I did not have many of my mother gifts, but even I could feel the emotions of one as powerful as her.
And she felt something for me.
The smallest ember of emotion, which may catch.
And so hope remained.
And so despite everything, I had reason to smile.
Scarlett
I was 3/4ths of the way through my coffee when Tyler trudged in. Not walked, not marched, trudged. I have seen him do such a thing exactly twice in my entire life. The day after dad died, and the morning he got back from shore leave after graduation. Given that no one we know died, and the incredibly visible and large hickey on his neck… I’d say that my brother was engaging in…. Fraternization.
I’m impressed honestly. I had a bet with myself that he wouldn’t last through the 2nd night on the longbow, now it’s been a whole week! Impressive.
As Tyler rounds the corner, I notice his odd gait, swinging his leg out and forward, rather than straight ahead in proper marching style.
Fraternization indeed.
He stops at the counter, grabs one of the stools, and gingerly sits down. We lock eyes for just a moment and have an instant of perfect, non verbal twin to twin communication.
‘Really?’
‘Not a word’
The silence was broke by a sharp sniff through is nose, a long sigh and him shifting.
“Right then. Anything of note to report?”
“Negative sir” came Finians reply
“Nope”
“I have something sir” Zila had stopped tapping on her uniglass
“Well? The suspense is killing me legionnaire Madran, what is it?”
“Testy this more I see sir” Finian said, seeing if he couldn’t get a rise of his commander
“I have located blueprints and relevant construction information for the vault. I send them in a data package over our squad communications link, along with my personal analysis on viable points of entry.”
“Didn’t get much sleep then I take it Legionaire?”
“No more than you sir”
I choked on my coffee. Finian did a spit take and Tyler looked utterly bewildered.
“First: what I was or wasn’t doing last night is between me and the maker. Second: did you just make a joke?”
“No. I stated a fact. I got 4 hours and thirty two minutes of sleep last night, while by my estimation you got between four and three quarters and five hours of sleep.”
Finians pale skin was now flushed a pale shade of pink from him trying to hold in his laughter, meanwhile I was laughing around the coffee stuck in my throat and Tyler looked even more bewildered. The kind of bewildered that makes a deer in headlights look like a professor of psychology.
“I-uh- Well anyways, if you could pull up the data on the table hologram so we can prepare a briefing legionnaire.”
“Yes sir”
Aurora
I woke up with puffy eyes and a throat that felt like it has seen the wrong side of an industrial sandblaster. Turns out: crying yourself to sleep is awful. I can’t believe Hollywood lied to me. It’s almost like it’s full of paid actors.
I had to peel myself from my bed, I sign I had slept far deeper than normal. I opened the closet, and found that it was stocked with clothes exactly to my size and liking. I picked out a nice outfit and walked to what I could only assume was the kitchen, where I heard the gentle murmur of voices. I rounded to find everyone else in the squad all chatting amounts themselves, with coffee and, of all people, Cat, manning, as my mother would call it, the cooker. Tyler looked up, and gave me a kind smile.
“Well then, that’s everyone. I’ll start the briefing now if no one has any objections.” He paused “Ok good.” He tapped a button in the centre of the table. It lit up revealing blueprints, for what looked like a very over the top bank vault.
“This, ladies and gentlemen, is our target. The most fortified, secure, and impenetrable bank vault ever designed. Within, is contained the last part of the trigger, a 32 karat chunk of Eshvaren crystal.”
Scar leaned forward. “So an easy jaunt into a bank vault to steal a gem. What’s the problem?”
“Finian?”
The Beretreskan nodded
“If you remember Biattchis office, with the security system that would wake a carreer criminal screaming? This one would make them hand themselves in to the police and collapse into a jibbering, insane mess. Laser sensors and hair wire triggers, weighted boxes and hard vacuum. Silent penetration is nearly impossible”
Kal spoke up “so how do we intended to get in quietly?”
Finian giggled like a kid on Christmas morning. “Kal…. Who said anything about quiet?”
Tyler tapped the button on the table again.
“We will be organized into 3 groups of two, with Zila running support here.” He gestured at a point on the holographic map, indicating the apartment “Legionnaires De Seel and Jones task is to create a distraction. I don’t care if it’s a riot, a brawl, anything. We just need all eyes away from the vault. Legionnaire Gilwraith and Aurora will be our backup in case we have unwanted guests. Finally, me and legionnaire Brannock will be infiltrating the facility, opening the vault, and retrieving the target. Any questions?”
“How do we intends to breach the vault?”
Tyler’s eyes glimmered. “Are you familiar with shaped charges?”
[End of part 1. Teehee]
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Ultrakill Review: Turn Back Now
"Better late than never ammiright chat"
Ultrakill is one of the best shooter games I've ever played. I'm am no expert on shooters, I've played a good amount. I hate "tatical" shooters, which is why shooters like Valorant have repulsed me, whereas games like Fortnite and Team Fortress 2 have been my addiction. Heck, even in 2016, I liked Overwatch (obviously not anymore), but there was a time. Because "tactical" shooters just equate to camping around in one place waiting for someone to fight you, and doing anything energetic or running around the place is severely discouraged and games like those actively avoid rewarding players for risky play.
Tactical Shooters Suck, Ultrakill isn't one
Games like Team Fortress 2 and Fortnite are so insanely fun to me because those are shooters that ENCOURAGE you to fight people and have a risky playstyle, while giving players the option to camp, it moreso discourages it and grinding through entire lobbies feels just so satisfying. That being said, you can probably guess that Ultrakill would easily be something I would fall in love with, and you'd be perfectly correct on that. Ultrakill is everything I love about shooters, with 0 of the problems. Heck, this may be even my favorite shooter. While I'm not particularly good at the game, it is so insanely fun, and dying in the game always feels like my fun and not some sort of unbalanced enemy or really weird game design choice.
Combat
Of course, the game isn't finished and has 2 more chapters out of its 9 chapters, but those last 2 chapters could be awful, and I still would love the game. I have most of the game here. I could just ignore those last 2 chapters (again, assuming it's bad, which is highly unlikely). One of the reasons that it's unlikely is due to the games great combat system, I criticize games for cheap combat a lot, if you're making an action game, you need some good combat, and it takes a lot to impress me on that department. Ultrakill did just that. Impress me. It has a wide variety of weapons to choose from, and every level of the game's somehow feels designed around those weapons. There are so many different enemies, each with their own unique weaknesses, good play and risky movement where you utilize all the tools at your desposal is rewarded with style points, just seeing that "ULTRAKILL" combo sign hits different.
Movement
Ultrakill, while simple in terms of how you can move around the map, is really fun and gets the job well. In the beauty of its simplicity, you can perform lots of cool tricks that made me feel like an edgy teen all over again. Again, the style point system works well and constantly dashing to the goal in a short period of time while making sure to kill all the enemies and doing it all in a style is a pretty daunting and time consuming yet fun goal to achieve for all levels. Not a single level in Ultrakill kept me bored aside from the secret missions. And yes, the movement is somewhat simple in Ultrakill, and while I have seen that there is cool stuff you can do, I can't help but feel that I wish there's a bit more that could be done to improve the game's movement and add more to it while not taking away from its simplicity.
Presentation
We're in an era where people yield nostolgia to things like the N64, and PS1, but honestly, I'd compare this games graphics to Doom, that's despite the fact that the game goes out of its way to tell you that it's inspired by PS1 graphics. The game also goes out of its way to make its creatures disgusting and egregious to look it, really conveying hell's warfare to you well. The game does a great job at conveying some of the story through its environment. enviormental storytelling is always a great way of helping to tell a game story. The music is also great, the chaotic nature of the game just blended perfectly with the music style of Breakcore, I would not pick any other genre of music for a game of the kind, especially the boss themes, that's when the game really locks in. But, I will say, while all the enviorments do a great job of distinguishing each other while keeping the games disturbing feel, that can't be said for gluttony. It honestly was a bit too gross to look at, but apparently, the games developer stated that won't be of concern since he's planning on redesigning it, which I'm looking forward to.
Verdict
Ultrakill is one of, if not the best, shooter video games that I have ever played and pushes the genre of indie shooters to major new heights. I'm excited to see the game's story end, and I'll continue to replay the hell out of it for the future, it's one of the most addicting experiences I've ever had the pleasure of, you should turn back now because this game will throw you into a loop which you won't be able to escape, trying to break through that mess is crazy.
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We know where Idrila is, Xipe is an artificial Aeon, and Sigonia is in the Lepismat star system [theory]
interesting thing about Penacony is that it has a lot of symbolic ties and imagery relating to Aeons that have, frankly, no business being there. or do they? having a bit too much fun reading too much into text.
tinfoil hat territory though bc this is for funsies
this will be a bit longer than usual (and the usual is already very long) beause im combining multiple trains of thought. it all started with bees. ahh, bees. were getting to the bees later though. lets start
Transmutation
When the Swarm Disaster began, Ena sought out Qlipoth and called them the "dreammaker that pulls and influences the will of transmutation." Essentially, seeking them out specifically due to this transmutation ability.
To help with understanding, this is the definition of transmutation:
The act of changing from one form, nature, substance, or state into another; synonymous with transform, convert.
heres where things get highly subjective and interpretative, because the moment of Tayzzyronths "fall" is described very, very vaguely.
- Swarm Disaster, Chapter: Preservation II
this is kind of tough to parse, so ill explain how i interpret this event:
During this.. "execution", multiple Aeons are present, "more than three voices". We know that Qlipoth (giant hammer), Aha (subtle laughter), and Tayzzyronth (whimpering) are present for sure. Ena is also likely present if you presume the "symphony" to be their sounds, but there are more Aeons that are left undescribed.
Interestingly, Tayzzyronth being repeatedly struck (?) by Qlipoths hammer is described as "diluting". just for funsies, heres the definition:
dilute /dī-loo͞t′, dĭ-/ transitive verb 1. To make thinner or less concentrated by adding a liquid such as water. 2. To lessen the force, strength, purity, or brilliance of, especially by admixture. 3. To decrease the value of (shares of stock) by increasing the total number of shares.
To describe Tayzzyronths "death" as them being "diluted" is strange. Also, whats diluting them? Heres were we come back to the idea of transmutation.
Theres no direct evidence for what im about to say, so take it as me just offering a viewpoint and you decide for yourself if you vibe with that idea.
I propose that Tayzzyronth is being diluted by other Aeons. Drowning out their voice, so to speak
After this event, you discover a "white cloth" and "several puzzle pieces that sway in the wind”. The puzzle pieces are a clear connection to Xipe, implying that theyre present, but whats the white cloth?
Ena's puppet body is covered in a white cloth, and it being "tattered" is likely to showcase that they, too, were subject to Qlipoths hammer of justice transmutation.
Xipe is said to have assimilated Ena, so its interesting that they seem to be already present here. Itd be an insane coincidence if Xipe just happened to mysteriously absorb Ena at the same time as Tayzzyronth was "killed", but what if these two events are the exact same thing?
To put it bluntly, Qlipoth combined Ena and Tayzzyronth to become Xipe.
The entire thing is brought up again in 2.2, showcasing once more that any information on ancient history is unreliable because things are told to us very differently here.
Thus far, the events of the Swarm Disaster are vague at best and a complete mystery at worst. the most trustworthy telling of this story comes from the Simulated Universe, where we learn the truth surrounding this event. and as explained previously, during SU:SD we learn that Qlipoth was the one who "diluted" Tayzzyronth while other Aeons watched, and the only detail concerning Xipe was puzzle pieces swaying in the wind after this supposed "execution"
In short, Acheron and Black Swan are completely wrong here. At least Acheron prefaces this by saying "Legend has it" meaning that this is what normal people came up with after millenia of uncertainty. But we are intellectuals, weve played Simulated Universe: Swarm Disaster, and we know better
what comes after is fascinating though. stories have limited time to tell the things they want to tell, so theyre not going to waste time mentioning something thats genuinely irrelevant. Boothill being written to say that "the two leaderless Paths are working behind the scenes" is purposeful, because they couldve made him say anything else, but they chose to make him bring up the possibility that the Propagation is involved in Penacony.
Dan Heng going on to say that he doesnt see any "descendants of the Propagation in Penacony" is similarly interesting, because this is a simple, obvious surface-level deduction. yes, we dont see giant bugs in penacony.. do we? Again, they couldve made them say anything else, but they specifically chose to explore the idea of the Propagation in Penacony, even if the characters ultimately discard the idea.
Lets veer off a little for a couple of small tidbits to back this idea up a little more:
Path Symbols. The red symbol in the middle is whats used to represent the Swarm Disaster, theres clear similarities to the symbol of the Propagation (left), but its arranged in a strangely familiar, Harmony (right) way?
Theres a fascinating description at the very beginning of Swarm Disaster that, when i was replaying it, immediately reminded me of something:
Soulglad.
This text essentially describes the blood of Tayzzyronth, and by extention, the Swarm, as orange and colorful, smelling of oranges and other tropical fruits, evoking the feeling of an ocean of soda. Additionally, it seems to have hallucinogenic properties. This is consistent throughout Swarm Disaster. The various descriptions of Soulglad(tm) match the traits of Swarm Blood very, very closely, once again subtly tying the Propagation to Penacony.
basically, theres a lot that connects Tayzzyronth to Xipe, really hammering home that Propagation and Order were combined to create Harmony.
but hold your horses.
Xipe has, as we know, three faces. If they were made from two Aeons, their imagery surrounding the number 3 wouldnt be making a lot of sense now, would it?
This might be a bit of a leap, but they dont half-ass their symbolism. if Xipe is associated with threes, then why would it be..two? That doesnt add up. Theres Tayzzryonth and Ena, so, based only on this logic, who could possibly be the secret third Aeon that got roped into the transmutation?
but first, lets return to Swarm Disaster for a bit, and meet Xipe!
Xipe's dialogue is very, very unique, because it has three colors: blue, red, and white. although only red and blue seem to be "clashing". One of them is clearly Ena, but its hard to imagine Tayzzyronth being able to make coherent sentences.
Whats interesting though, is that Xipe knows Akivili, even though this is (potentially) the first time Akivili has met them (because Xipe was born very recently). Yet, Xipe talks to them as if they were an old friend.
Even more interesting is that Aha knows "Xipe" and says something curious about them: "changes happen rapidly"
"We were still negotiating last time, but this time, Ena already became you. It's a shame, my friend! But I must say Ena makes you look even better."
Xipe is a new existence, and the way Aha talks to them is as though theyre talking to who they used to be, and that someone is not Ena, because Aha specifies that "Ena makes you look even better", so who is this "you" that Aha was so familiar with, and whom they were negotiating with, before their "change"? Its not Tayzzyronth, because they were certainly not friends.
We know that both the path of Propagation and the path of Order are considered "leaderless" or... "dead but in a weird situation" if we want to be complicated. so, hypothetically, the secret third Aeon would have to be in a similar situation.
The only Aeons this applies to are Long the Permanence and Idrila the Beauty, both of which have "disappeared under mysterious circumstances" so they check off our requirements! However, we can write off Long, because according to Kafka, "After the disappearance of Long the Permanence, Tayzzyronth divided the Aeon's Path" meaning that Long had already disappeared before Tayzzyronth became an Aeon. This leaves only Idrila as our third candidate and component for Xipe.
So, was Aha friends with Idrila? Itd make sense for them to comment "Ena makes you look even better" if their whole thing was Beauty, and Ena made them "even more beautiful", right?
Fun side tidbit: Kafka says that "when the Swarm Disaster began to take hold, Tayzzyronth was attacked and killed by multiple Aeons." hm! anyway, moving on
Idrila
So, Idrila might be somewhere in our Xipe-flavoured slushie of divinity. Is there...any other evidence except the vague notion that, because Xipe is associated with threes, there must be a third Aeon?
Well, this is a theory for a reason. theres very vague implications, but nothing concrete to really support the idea. But heres a list of circumstantial evidence that could mean something:
All three Aeons (Propagation, Order, and Beauty) can be considered "leaderless paths", yet pathstriders still seem to be able to draw power from their path, which shouldnt be possible if their Aeon were really dead. Idrila is considered to only be missing by the Knights of Beauty, Propagation-bugs still exist despite Tayzzyronths alleged "death", and Order...well, you saw Sunday.
Beauty has connections to music, just like Ena (symphony) and Xipe (song), this is primarily observed in the Sidequest Clockwork: Larose where she talks about a Song of Beauty. Additionally, the Knights of Beauty also "chant ancient beautiful songs/hymns" as they roam the universe. Xipe and Ena, too, have "ancient hymns".
Although all Aeons are referred to with THEY/THEM, Idrila and Xipe are occasionally referred to with feminine terms, Idrila is called the "goddess of Beauty" and Xipe is called "the mother of all stars". This doesnt have to mean anything, but theoretically in a slurry of genderless Aeons, two of which are a giant bug and a robot puppet/floating eye, the feminine aspect of Xipe has to come from somewhere, and it couldve been Idrila.
Idrila doesnt have an entry in the Simulated Universe (which is a trait they share with Long and Terminus, a strange bunch) and we dont know their appearance yet. A bit suspicious, it could be possible that their appearance is similar to Xipe, which would give away the fact that theyre one of their 3 components. Its also implied/speculated that the silver hair in Argenti's Lightcone An Instant Before A Gaze belongs to Idrila, which happens to have the same shade as Xipe's hair.
This is again, highly interpretative, but Xipes ideal cannot be created solely with Order and Propagation, youll have a united Hivemind with those two, but Xipes whole thing is the beautiful dream paradise that the hivemind wishes to live in, which would only be complete if you threw Beauty into the mix.
Origin Universe: "I have seen wonders beyond the scope of human imagination... I have seen dozens of insects intertwine and give birth to entirely new offspring, which in turn weave themselves together like a shape-shifting rose with countless interlocking petals. The reproductive cycle of the Swarm is akin to a flower emitting pheromones and various scents... a breathtaking combination of monstrosity and beauty..." - Swarm Disaster: Sand King: Tayzzyronth, Part IV
Swarm Disaster has a lot of repetitive keywords and imagery all of which represent certain Aeons and their presence/influence. Mentions of roses/flowers, duty and beauty are Idrila’s, which are present in Swarm Disaster. In this case, in tandem with the Swarm.
Speaking of the Swarm Disaster, we are first introduced to Idrila and the Knights of Beauty through Argenti, who was released alongside the bugs of the swarm. Although the Swarm Disaster expansion was released earlier, this was the Swarm's first appearance in the main plot. This is very pointed, because it narratively ties the Swarm to Beauty.
In 2.0, theres a dream sequence shown to us by Samporkle that feels incredibly out of place, and weird, and we have no idea whats going on. But theres clearly a hidden meaning there, especially because Samporkle tells us so
Were told that theres a truth behind this dream and that it contains a hidden meaning, its likely an allegory to Penacony as a whole, but even now, in 2.2, we cant really make heads or tails of it. Likely, this will be covered in 2.3, when Sparkle’s buttons come back into play. But the thing i want to focus on is the beginning of the sequence where we encounter three trashcans.
Now, this could be a stretch, but you have to split something for these three trashcans perfectly evenly, balanced, and theyre each referred to as Serious (Propagation, wealth symbolizing excess here), Wise (Order), and Beautiful (Beauty), i just feel like thats a little on the nose, isnt it? “But why would they parallel Aeons?” you ask, and i hear you, its mosty because the text refers to their watchful gazes a lot, and Aeons.. gaze upon you. A stretch, again, i know, but i felt it was worth mentioning regardless.
And lastly:
The Mirror Holders are a faction following the Beauty, and its said that
"When the God of Beauty died, THEIR fragments were scattered to the cosmos. The wandering Mirror Holders tried their best to find clues and recapture these fragments, hoping to one day piece everything back together and let Beauty return to the world."
This seems to say that Idrila died, but keep in mind that its entirely unknown what happened to Idrila. Whats interesting is that, for some reason, their "fragments" (mirror imagery) were "scattered" when they "disappeared". this would add up if they were subject to Qlipoths ol' magic hammer and turned into Xipe-mush. The process isnt exactly pretty, if Enas "tattered white cloth" is anything to go by.
This isnt the point i was going for though, the point is that theres a rather interesting character in the Clockie Cartoon that fits this description to a T: the Mirror Princess
We know that every character in the Clockie Cartoon represents a person from the past: Clockie is Mikhail, Boss Stone is the IPC, Captain Revolver is Tiernan, and the Mirror Princess is thought to be Razalina, given her involvement with Memoria and her disappearance in the memory zone.
But symbolism is symbolism and a role can fulfill multiple purposes and represent multiple people, especially considering the very pointed imagery of shattering.
They fight against an intangible monster called "Unknown" and we know these events are not what happened 1-1 in the past because everybody here is present for the Mirror Princess' "death", and Razalina disappeared in the memory zone while doing research and we technically dont know what happened to her (personally I think this will be covered in 2.3 but this is unrelated)
Anyway, the shattering of a mirror is extremely evocative of the shattering of Idrila:
When the God of Beauty died, THEIR fragments were scattered to the cosmos.
and particularly they point out that despite the Mirror Princess' death/shattering, she is still watching over "Dreamville" (Penacony) with her radiant glow. That, in turn, is evocative of Xipe, because what else is an intangible entity that watches over Penacony with their radiance? This doesnt sound like something a regular person like Razalina would be capable of
This is just to tie in parallels and connections between Idrila and Xipe though, theres a lot of very circumstantial things connecting them, but again, nothing explicit or concrete. this is a theory. im not expecting to get anything 100% right here.
The mirror-holder gazes into the mirror, but recognizes not the face staring back.
Plus, if Idrila is now Xipe, they wouldnt recognize their Beauty in the face of the Harmony.
So, weve established that Idrila is a pretty good candidate for the third component of Xipe in Qlipoth's act of transmutation. The evidence is circumstantial, but there is this interesting little discovery i made when revisiting our favourite goddess: Gaiathra Triclops
Gaiathra Triclops, Sigonia, and Lepismat
We know Order was "assimilated" into Xipe, this is pretty much fact. but theres some more things that tie into Propagation that ill mention here.
ive established before that the goddess Gaiathra Triclops is Ena (or at least has strong ties to Ena) pretty irrefutably, but the ties go a little deeper, i just didnt have reason or context to make anything of these ties yet. i do now! yippee
Avgin is repeatedly mentioned to mean Honey, seemingly for no reason
"Avgin" means "honey" in the Sigonian language. It's a conventional term irretrievably lost in the long arc of cosmic history. - Sigonia, the Unclaimed Desolation, Planar Ornament Set
Clearly, theres a reason its always brought up, and why its pointed out, and why they emphasize that theres a reason that one of the clans is named "honey". In tandem, "Katica" means "shellslasher". This will be relevant
ive tried tracing the etymology of Gaiathra before, and although this is highly subjective, i ended up with "gaia" and "kerithra": mother gaia the greek personification of the earth, and kerithra which is greek for "honeycomb"
Sigonia is also shown to look like a beehive in the planar ornament set.
Honey evokes the imagery of Bees, which ..are insects. obviously. The hexagonal shapes of the honeycomb are also often used to indicate structure, control, and orderliness in general media. orderly little worker bees, hives, hivemind, you get the idea.
although physical depictions of Gaiathra dont exist, we know shes considered to be a "left palm with three eyes" which is un-insect-like. Thats just a side point though, most importantly is the entire honey-bee-insect association they seem to be going for here.
So, Gaiathra has ties to Order and also Propagation. But we cant forget the second part of her name, Triclops, once again bringing up the imagery of threes, similar to Xipe. Gaiathra has 3 eyes and may thrice close her eyes for you, and is also the goddess of three domains: fertility, travel, and trickery, so...whats up with that. Is Gaiathra just Xipe after all?
Yes and no, i think its simpler and more complicated than that
Origin Universe: "The formidable army spawned by the self-replication and division of the Sand King originates from the Lepismat system. Some units of the Swarm have transformed into ground combat units... They have sacrificed flight for colossal size and hardened carapaces... These units often serve as the shock troops of the Swarm Invasion, using their massive bodies to break through defenses..." - Swarm Disaster: Sand King: Tayzzyronth, Part IV
Before we go into that though, lets establish some ground: Tayzzyronth was born in the Lepismat System, on a Sand Planet later known as Elydichna. The entire planet was home to these insects, until one day an unnamed man arrived with the goal of establishing a civilization there, and subsequently caused the extinction of these insects, leaving only one behind: Tayzzyronth. Being the only remaining survivor, their loneliness made them ascend to Aeonhood.
The way the unnamed man is described is…. very familiar.
“Always managed to succeed against all odds”, “his triumphs have filled him with avarice, hubris, and an unwavering belief that he can conquer [anything]” and “He can get whatever he desires but never discovered what he really wants” Sound familiar?
Why, that sounds like our good friend Aventurine!
I know, that sounds ridiculous. But also so, so on point, this is hardly a coincidence. Why describe this random, unnamed man in such a way? We follow this guys journey throughout the chapters of Lepismat System: Massacre Saga and it is all a heavy parallel to Aventurines story: Hes afflicted by Nihility, but became a self-annihiliator in search of his lost self, successfully built a civilization yet had to watch its collapse and everyones death while he remained alive throughout it all, until he eventually succumbed to Nihility after finding his lost self and became a Sin Thirster, unable to let go of his regrets.
To my knowledge, this is the first mention of Sin Thirsters by name, tying this to Penacony even more intensely due to Acheron.
This unnamed man is such a heavy “what-if” parallel to Aventurine that i can hardly even believe it. Whats funny is that theres an allusion to the man being guided to Lepismat by Aha, and coincidentally we know Aventurine was invited to the Tavern, too. Ridiculous, right?
Well, this is getting a little into conspiracy territory again, but I believe this is an iteration of Aventurine in an earlier Samsara. We know Hoyo LOVES samsaras and theres plenty implying that such a thing is happening, especially when we look at the chapter of the Beyond the Sky Choir which ill add in at the end for anyone curious about it. Regardless, the man that founded a civilization on a sand planet in the Lepismat system and caused the ascension of Tayzzyronth is a parallel to Aventurine.
So, lets just go a little crazy: What if that sand planet is just Sigonia-IV? After millenia, the original name of the planet (Elydichna) was surely forgotten, causing it to be rediscovered at one point and re-named Sigonia. “But theres no basis for this assumption!” There isnt, but im having a blast. Let me point you to something funny:
Aventurine, completely unprompted, brings up the idea of the Intelligentsia Guild digging up the remains of the Sand King Tayzzyronth from the sands of Egyhazo.
What a weird thing to make him say, bringing up Tayzzyronth in relation to Aventurine, his remains no less. It was a lie and he was mocking them, but the mention is interesting nonetheless. Theres also just a mountain of questions here: Does the Guild not know which planet Tayzzyronth originated from? Does anyone? So much knowledge is obscured or lost to time, how do they know Tayzzyronth even died on the planet they were born? How does Aventurine know? Hes talking about a place called Egyhazo here, evidently not Sigonia, unless its the name of a desert in Sigonia? We just dont know. The details dont matter, the fact that Tayzzyronth, and indirectly, the sand planet they were born/died on, is brought up by Aventurine, whom weve established is a parallel to the man who was inadvertently the reason for Tayzzyronths ascension in the first place… is crazy.
But lets focus on this: Tayzzyronths remains.
According to the scholar, such horrors have not completely disappeared. The Imperator Insectorum's descendants remain, and THEY could return at any moment. This scholar once showed me his collection — A dull yellow piece of amber with moving flecks and a buzzing tremor. I was absolutely gob-smacked to hear him say that it is part of the "Imperator Insectorum's Prison Cell." The omniscia implanted in my forehead could not see the future of this item, which only serves to corroborate the scholar's claims. All I can do is pray in silence to the Reignbow that such a day will not come soon. - Glimpses into the Beyond: Swarm Author
In this text, Fu Xuan narrates that there are pieces of amber containing “remains” of Tayzzyronth. The “amber” is a clear pointer to Qlipoth, and amber is a pretty classic thing to preserve insects in.
With the release of 2.1, we also got a new ascension material: Divine Amber. Specifically, its “the amber that rains from the Amber Lord's body when THEY swing the celestial hammer.” Curiously, Aventurine is currently the only one to use it. Its clear that this whole thing seems to refer to the moment that Qlipoth swung their hammer at Tayzzyronth to transmute them, and similarly to how a white cloth from Ena and shattered mirror pieces of Idrila were found after the fact, pieces of Tayzzyronth were likely also left over, which were then encased in Amber by Qlipoth.
This is, once again, circumstantial because there is nothing directly tying Elydichna/Lepismat to Sigonia, except for a few common themes and references from Aventurine. Both places, however, are consistently described as desolate to the point that thats a clear keyword to look out for. Also, they make a point to say that Sigonia is “located in an unclaimed zone”, meaning that it could totally be the Elydichna Starzone/the Lepismat star system. The lack of confirmation is valid, too.
The Tear Crystal of Glorious Death synthesis material has a rather interesting description, because it describes a Mourning Actor taking a Gondola to a “silent world of barrenness” which was the site of a “doomsday battlefield”. This is a direct reference to Swarm Disaster, specifically the Gondola: Helping Gods! chapter.
Origin Universe: The gondola set sail, and the drowsy Mourning Actors lay at the bottom deck, carefully guarding the glittering Memory Bubble. But soon, the ship vanished eerily, like a ghost fading into the stream of the universe.
Meaning that the “silent world of barrenness” is Elydichna in the Lepismat system, Tayzzyronths sand planet. Note here that “barrenness” is a synonym for “desolation”, a word consistently used to describe Elydichna, as well as Sigonia, whose Planar Ornament set is literally called Sigonia, the Unclaimed Desolation. (mic drop)
I jest. Anyway, the fact that Tayzzyronth was fated to “die” in the same place they were born implies the transmutation took place on Elydichna, and that the planet was not destroyed despite everything, considering that the Mourning Actor arrives to the aftermath.
To focus on the Tears for a moment, they could be anyone’s, ranging from Tayzzyronth’s, Ena’s, or even Idrila’s. Due to their crystalline nature, im inclined to believe theyre Idrila’s tears, though. Actually, Idrila’s imagery is very similar to that of Fuli the Remembrace, mirrors, crystals, gems, etc. Herta says that the Enigmata’s birthplace is the Remembrance, and I can see that being the case for Beauty, too. “Beautiful memories” and all that. What a wild family.
Going back to Sigonia, we know there are at least 3 tribes present on Sigonia, once again following the rule of threes. Theres the Avgins (honey), and Katicans (shellslashers) and an unnamed third faction which are only ever referred to as Sigonians. This unnamed third tribe are the ones who established the Sigonian Sovereignty, though “this unity and progress did not extend to the Avgins and Katicans.”
Personally i believe the three tribes to be the descendants of the Elydichnans, each possibly paralleling a variant species of the Swarm, theres a curious part in the Lepismat System chapter that lists three bugs:
Look around while making the record. — You're curious as to what kinds of insects he's caught during the process. Origin Universe: At his feet lie a few *Larnoli Worms*, characterized by their soft bodies and exquisite color hues... reminiscent of jelly drops. Origin Universe: On his table, there are tiny *Fisgerald Bugs*... ruthless and elusive assassins... Some of them only reveal their true form under certain lighting conditions. Origin Universe: He is toying with... a *Tagger* in his hand? No matter how you move around, his gaze never meets yours as he always keeps an eye on your back. - Swarm Disaster: Lepismat System: Massacre Saga, Part IV
These bugs are only ever mentioned here, meaning there is more to them than meets the eye. The tagger is implied to have affected the unnamed man that established Elydichna, while the other two are seemingly irrelevant. This is by and far the biggest stretch thus far, that these have anything to do with the tribes on Sigonia, but the Fisgerald Bugs being “ruthless elusive assassins” is evocative of the Katicans, who are described as “bloodthirsty, cruel, and ferocious”. Additionally, Katica means “shellslasher”, which could refer to the act of slicing through the carapace (shell) of a monster from the swarm. This is wholly and genuinely only based on vibes, though.
Another little side note, throughout 2.1 theres a theme of wondering what the Sigonians (or perhaps, specifically the Avgins) did to deserve “living in a world like that” (one of tragedy and despair). If they intend to imply some sort of “collective sin” that the Sigonians must repay (for the actions committed by their ancestors?), i can imagine the “sin” being the very ascension of Tayzzyronth and as a result, the entirety of the Swarm Disaster. Especially since the unnamed man, who could be blamed as the catalyst, is a parallel to Aventurine.
Anyway, lets go back to Gaiathra Triclops!
Now that we have this whole context, what can we say about Gaiathra Triclops? Theres ties to Tayzzyronth, but theres evidently ties to Ena, too… Sooo whats up?
What with this whole spiel about remains and there being pieces left over after the transmutation of all Aeons involved (Tayzzyronths remains in amber, Ena’s cloth, Idrila’s shattered mirror), I believe Gaiathra is just that. The leftovers of these 3 Aeons combined, not enough to form an Aeon or resemble Xipe in any way, but enough to be its own entity. A left palm is pretty “thats all thats left over of them?” to me, especially since the Sigonians believe that “the earth, the mountains, and all that exists on the land are a part of the Mother Goddess' divine body” so theres a body, but its the very earth itself, and whats left is only a left hand.
Gaiathra contains references and imagery to all three Aeons, the eyes of the Avgins being a reference to Ena, the history of Sigonia being tied to Tayzzyronth, especially Kakava:
The Avgins view the world through the body of the Mother Goddess — the earth, the mountains, and all that exists on the land are a part of the Mother Goddess' divine body. And at the end of each calendar year, her divine body will perish. On that significant day, her divine essence ascends as a resplendent aurora in the night sky and is reborn in the following day. Hence, Avgins celebrate the first day of the new year through their grand festival called "Kakava." During this festival, they weave sacrificial vessels known as "Knots of Cyclicality" and toss them into bonfires to commemorate the Great Goddess' birth. - Sigonia, the Unclaimed Desolation, Planar Ornament Set
They celebrate the “death and birth of the Great Goddess”. To me, this sounds a lot like Tayzzyronths history, born and died on their home sand planet. There is consistent implication of cyclicality in Swarm disaster, as well as rebirth and the foretelling of their return (likely a reference to the samsara). Incidentally, The link rope in the Sigonia planar ornament set is called Knots of Cyclicality, and the Kakava festival is about the annual death and rebirth of Gaiathra.
So how about references to the third Aeon, Idrila? Well, the Avgins are blessed with “attractive facial features, beautiful eyes, and an innate wealth of emotional intelligence.” Interesting thing to point out about them, isnt it? They couldve just been emotionally intelligent but they chose to emphasize their beauty, too. Also, they seem to “have an appreciation for intricately patterned fabrics, as well as a penchant for jewelry crafted from precious gemstones” which i personally believe to be attributes of Beauty as well.
Theres another thing: Gaiathra is said to “reign over all matters related to fertility, travels, and trickery”, which is a very strange bunch of domains to be a goddess of, as they all seem very unrelated to each other and have nothing in common.
This is likely a reference to Propagation, Order, and Beauty. Propagation is clearly fertility, as they reproduce endlessly. Order is most likely trickery, given that Ena was the one who orchestrated the transmutation and people believe its puppet body to be the Aeon when its actually the eye, and travel potentially refers to Idrila, since the Knights of Beauty “fearlessly travel from planet to planet, extolling the name of Idrila to the beings of the universe.“ They have Idrila’s blessing, so in a way, Idrila is blessing their travels.
So! Thats just about the end of my very longwinded way of conveying the idea that Xipe is an Aeon made of Tayzzyronth, Ena, and Idrila through Qlipoths transmutation by request of Ena, likely to suppress the Propagation and keep it under control so another Swarm Disaster doesnt happen again. With added bonus speculation that Sigonia is Elydichna, the birthplace of Tayzzyronth, and that theres a samsara going on.
Heres some cut bonus content that is unrelated to the theory, which I thought were fun. They support underlying ideas, but didnt fit into the overall structure, so im adding them here at the end like a bloopers gag reel.
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In 2.1, when Aventurine and Ratio are doing puzzles in Sunday's mansion they come across statues of "nightingales", and Aventurine strangely points out that they actually look more like Torment Eagles to him.
This is a really, really weird remark to make because this goes nowhere. So, i thought, clearly, this is foreshadowing, and these statues are not nightingales, they really are actually torment eagles.
and lo and behold!
2.2 brings up Torment Eagles again. they tied torment eagles to Sunday and Robin and basically answered, yes, these statues were torment eagles, aventurine. and im the only guy excited about torment eagle mentions. i delight in the simple things in life.
this is just to illustrate that they dont bring up things for no reason, and they will elaborate on them.
In Swarm Disaster, theres a chapter about the Beyond the Sky Choir, which focuses on a pair of two twin brothers: the elder twin is made crown prince, while the younger twin is referred to as a singer. Sound familiar?
These are likely incarnations of Sunday and Robin in an earlier samsara, just like how the unnamed man is Aventurine’s.
Their story ends with a sacrifice. The younger twin drowns, and is said to have the “most moving and holy of voices that ever harmonized for the gods”, extremely evocative of Robin. Remember that in the dreammaster’s original plan, Robin was going to sing at the Charmony Festival and summon the Order, likely intended as a ritualistic sacrifice.
I didnt manage to fit this into the screenshot, but the text continued like this:
Swarm Universe: ...His sacrifice marked the end of this farcical dispute. Swarm Universe: And a crowd was kneeling by the shore, expressing their thanks for the drowned, even if they still don't know *which one* of the twins it was. - Swarm Disaster: Beyond the Sky Choir: Anomaly Archives, Part II
This is extremely curious. The people witnessing the sacrifice were not able to tell which one of the twins it was that drowned. A strange mention likely intended to mean that the roles were actually reversed, and that it was the crown prince elder twin who ended up drowning, while the younger singer twin is the one that lived. That is what happened in 2.2. Most likely the truth is that in the earlier samsara, it was the younger twin that died, but the implication of reversal was a hint that, in a later iteration, they would swap roles.
To further hit home that Sunday and Robin are explicitly tied to these twins:
The dreammaster calls them “twins of the Order”, despite them not being twins. Clearly echoing that the “destined path” one of them needs to “follow to the end” is a consistent cycle of siblings being separated.
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/theres another bit of speculation surrounding the Stellaron Hunters which also ties into my other post about the theory of Elio being an Emanator of Order but this post is very long and i cant add any more images. boo. so youll find it in a reblog from me somewhere.
Anyway thank you for reading ♥
#honkai star rail#ena the order#idrila the beauty#tayzzyronth the propagation#gaiathra triclops#qlipoth the preservation#hsr#vampy.txt
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hey im planning to switch over to linux and need advice from the smart people of tumblr, please and thank you. my messages are open so if you need any info to help me out hmu.
General Questions:
im seeing everyone saying ubuntu, mint, and ziron are "the #1 go to versions for beginners" but like... which is it?
i also hear about security being the best with linux but nothing about it coming with antiviruses. does it come with one like how windows comes with defender or do you install that yourself, or is it something different entirely?
all the sources i look at talk about downloading and installing linux but i want to know what to expect when first getting a prebuilt pc with the OS, like the system 76 pcs. do you have to set it up like when you install it or is it as easy as getting any new computer?
i know nothing about coding and im planning to get a computer from system 76 since it seems like the best, and its by far the only source that only comes with linux, and since my current one was pretty much ruined by someone i thought could fix it after a faulty outlet fried its insides, he didnt and made it worse.
so yeah, which linux version do you suggest for a computer moron, any suggestions for computers would be nice (max price is $1,300), i'll put the specs and my uses under the read more.
Preferences:
It ONLY comes with Linux. I despise what Windows has become and don't want to even bother dual booting cause I feel with the switchovers happening they're gonna get salty and make something that'll turn your computer into a bomb if you use Linux with it.
Kinda beefy but not a supercomputer. I don't use AI stuff, I'm not a programmer, but I do frequently play modded Minecraft with my friends and run smps for my Discord servers. I recently switched to Modrinth cause ATLauncher had been giving me trouble. Curseforge is out of the question.
At the most, I'll be playing VRChat with friends while having Spotify or Youtube in the background for music and Discord open in case someone needs my help in one of my servers, similar goes for running one of my SMPs just minus the VR.
Gaming Questions:
I also play VR games often, especially BeatSaber (modded ofc im not insane), and I have Half Life Alyx that I haven't been able to finish cause my already dead and gutted PC struggles to run it anymore even with the lowest settings. My current headset is a two feet in the grave, barely hanging in there, held by tape Oculus Rift S thats as old as my current PC whos also dead. I plan to get a new headset soon and had the Quest 2 recommended to me by friends. If theres better alternatives that isn't Meta please let me know.
I'm a DBD addict. Does it really run DBD or was that just the one guy from the one video I saw.
My friends also often drag me onto Roblox so I need to know if that'll be an option for Linux too.
I know I could probably look up all this myself but every source is outdated from years ago or they all say different things and it just confuses me.
Art Questions:
My current tablet is a Wacom, I got it before knowing how greedy the company actually is, and I plan to switch to a Huion after this tablet dies on me. If compatibility is an issue with it please let me know what to do about that.
I usually use Medibang but I don't think it runs on Linux from what I've seen, if I'm wrong lemme know. Am I going to have to switch all the files over to something else before getting a Linux or are there programs I can use that'll load them?
I also write and need to know if I need to switch all my files to something else before porting it all over to the Linux PC. I just used the default notepad and document programs on Windows.
But yeah, that's all my questions for now. If I think of any more I'll just edit this post. Sorry if I sound super dumb for all this, I tried finding information sources myself but like I said all of them weren't too moron friendly or had relevant information. Most sources I found were articles or reddit forums from years ago so I thought "Hey, why don't I just go ask the computer nerds directly?" so here I am.
#linux help#linuxposting#arch linux#linux mint#linux#computers#computer#computer advice#computer help#switching from windows to linux#computer science
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when I took a month off work I was lowkey worried I'd come back and find everyone had been fine without me and I wasn't needed at all (because being terrible at every previous job I've had did some ✨damage✨ to my self confidence)
but that is not what happened
I have never encountered someone so fucking happy to see me as my boss' wife was on my first day back, her face lit up like it was christmas, she was practically jumping for joy because now that I'm back she doesn't have to do the ops team's fucking timesheets anymore
I have been told by one of the ops guys that my leave of absence had caused a genuine rift in the boss' marriage because his wife hated doing my job so much they were actively fighting about it
to be clear, his wife is lovely, she doesn't usually throw a shit fit about just anything, it was just that my job is just so fucking annoying that she hated every second of it, and that was the most validating shit I have ever experienced in my LIFE
and the reason she was pissed off at my boss/her husband about it is because he's too soft on his crew and doesn't make them all report their hours for the week
which, as you can imagine, makes building their timesheets extremely fucking difficult
it basically turns the whole process into a puzzle that I have to solve using roughly three different sources of information, one of which is the boss himself who isn't always easy to get ahold of when he's on a site
this puzzle is made even more difficult by the fact that a glitch in our form system keeps messing up the dates on the timecards, so I have to cross reference the time cards from the two (2) ops team members, who actually DO fill out their forms, with the roster, but my boss often changes the roster at the last minute without telling me or noting it down, so then I have to cross reference with the reports they have to submit for certain ongoing jobs because they'll have correct dates and also a list of who was present (if they were doing one off smalltime jobs that week I'll have no physical records and will rely entirely on the boss' memory to confirm dates and staff numbers, unless I can get ahold of one of the ops team members themselves and there's only one who will reliably communicate with me but only when he's not currently on a site)
I tried to explain this process to boss' wife before I left and, looking horrified, she asked me 'is there no way to streamline this?' I replied 'this is streamlined'
as far as I'm aware, as long as I've worked there, there has only been a handful of times people were paid incorrectly, and it was because I was not given correct information by the boss, in the time I was gone, his wife told me that she had incorrectly logged several pays because of this broken ass system
so, as you could imagine, my ego is through the fucking roof right now, I am GOOD at this bullshit job, I took an impossible system and made it work, I am playing on hard mode and killing it, in a field I had zero experience in before taking this job other than a natural inclination for organising and scheduling
and to be clear, I love this job, the boss is too soft on his staff but he's a good guy, he makes us all feel valued and appreciated, he paid me above my award rate, he's absurdly accommodating, and I have an insane amount of freedom to do what I want with company files
I may be working with a bullshit system but I can take naps in the office whenever I want and tell my boss off when he's being too soft (one time his wife literally started clapping when I told him off for sending clients their reports before they'd paid for them) and I get to control when I work, and whether I work from home or the office (which is GREAT when my back flares up)
I might not get many hours (only 16 hours per week) because the company is so small and I run out of things to do because I've streamlined everything (boss literally called me TOO EFFICIENT), but he'll give me those 16 even if I spend half of it playing solitaire and watching youtube
so just, yeah, it feels so good to be confident in my work, to feel valued and appreciated and like I'm actually successful at something after being handed dud jobs for years that I wasn't cut out for, and now knowing that what I'm doing is actually genuinely hard but I've been doing it anyway without fail, makes me feel good!
so tldr; taking a month off work taught me I have phenomenal job security because if my boss ever fires me his wife might actually fucking kill him
#lula's life#I have genuinely hit a point in my life I never thought I'd reach#I'm happy with my job#I'm not in constant pain#and I am living very comfortably with a friend I love dearly#I don't make a lot of money and still rely on government benefits but that's okay because I make enough to be comfortable#life is actually good I can't believe I made it
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Support System pt. 8
Roy Kent x Reader, spicy rating - MASTERLIST
CH1 | CH 2 | CH 3 | CH 4 | CH 5 | CH 6 | CH 7
It's gala time! With a sprinkle of Tedbecca cos I've missed them!
ohh and this is the gif on repeat in my head (that SMILE!! JFC):
~~~~~~
He hasn’t seen the dress yet. You’ve hung it up in his spare room while you deal with the other stuff you don’t do all that often like hair and make up - and when you do do it, you have a little shadow following you and asking if she can share your lipstick, what’s mascara, and why do you need to put that weird thing on your eyelashes. You’d both had to rush to get ready for work after he’d fucked you in the kitchen, everything taking that little bit longer when you could hardly keep your hands off each other. He’d gone off to Nelson Road with the promise of meeting you in the city so he could collect his suit. He’d run you a bath when you’d both gotten back to his, kissed each little fingertip bruise on your hips. You’d gone with Sara to get a manicure for the first time in a very, very long time, while Phoebe played Princesses with Roy.
“Jesus, you’re glowing. It’s sickening.” She laughed.
“I know you don’t want to hear this but just pretend it’s not Roy for a sec, cos it’s not really about him anyway, but it’s insanely different. Like night and day different to anything I’ve ever experienced in my life, Sara. My whole fucking life. It’s like I’ve been struck by lightning. With Andy it was just about him, with anyone else before actually. Like they didn’t actually care about me, it was only ever about them. And I mean that in every aspect, not just the sex.” She pulled a face, “I know, I’m not going to talk to you about the sex, I promise. I wish I could, because I need to shout it from the rooftops in all honesty.”
“I told you, he’s so ready to make someone happy. I’m glad that person is you.”
“I’m still nervous about tonight.”
“Don’t be!” She said, full of confidence.
“These people mean as much to him as you and your mum and Phebs do. It’s like you three top tier, then this entire building full of people he adores.”
“You’ve met Jamie though?”
“Yeah, but he still thinks I’m just your best friend. He’s going to know as soon as he sees me that that’s not the whole truth.”
“So are you labelling this thing when you meet everyone later?”
“He said it’s up to me. But I don’t want it to be up to me. Or not completely anyway.”
“If anyone asks, you’re friends. They don’t have to know that you’re friends who are sleeping together and are almost certainly more than friends.”
“Hmm. You’re right, we can do that. That sounds easy.”
“Ah. Wait, no. Forget that. I’ve seen his face around you. It’s literally impossible for him to disguise that he likes you. And tonight, with the dress and the boobs and the legs he’s just not going to be able to keep his face like,” she exaggerated Roy’s impassive, grumpy face, “that all night. He’ll never be able to manage it.”
“Oh.”
“So they find out you’re seeing each other - does it really matter?”
“Suppose not.”
“Exactly. So just enjoy it. Enjoy grown up company, drinks and a really fancy night on the town with a whole football team. You’ll have a blast.” You knew she was right, you repeat her comments in your head as you potter around Roy's room - hair done, make up done, you've just finished putting in some earrings and now you're having trouble with your necklace.
"Not going to fucking lie, if this is the outfit then I'm fine with that. I want my money back and we're not leaving the house, but I'm fine with all of that." He says from the doorway where he's been standing for goodness knows how long. His suit leaves you speechless, perfectly tailored with sharp lines. You know he can tell that it's had an effect on you.
"Make yourself useful." You tell him, handing him your necklace and turning your back on him.
"There are other ways I can do that," he suggests once he's done the necklace up, hands tracing the line of your strapless bra and your underwear.
"No time babe, the car is due soon isn't it?"
"I'm sure I've got time for something at least." He hooks his thumbs into your underwear, using them to pull you over to the bed and sitting down, moving you between his knees. You cup his face in your hands and kiss him, knowing you made a wise choice in not putting your lipstick on yet.
"I don't think we do. God, you look gorgeous." You run your hands down the lapel of his jacket.
"Bet you a fiver I can make you come and leave you enough time to finish getting ready before the car gets here."
"I'm not taking that bet," you laugh,
"Cos you know you'll fucking lose." He teases. You swat at his shoulder,
"Aren't you wasting valuable time?" His eyes light up, hands squeezing your bum.
"Well, it's not exactly what I wanted but you'll only tell me off if you have to do your hair again." His hands, as promised, make very quick work of you while he talks about everything else he wants to do. He holds you to him as you come back down from the high. "Dress on then." He tells you, taping your hip. "I'll be downstairs." He leaves you with a lingering kiss filled with promises for later. You step into the dress and lift it into place, reaching around for the zip. You slip on the shoes and apply your lipstick, checking the whole look in the mirror. You feel amazing, you just hope he agrees. He hears you on the stairs, "just in time-" He starts, but stops abruptly. "Holy fucking shit."
"That's what I said." You laugh. "It's OK?" He hasn't said another word or taken his eyes off you while you navigated the stairs. You wring your hands nervously. "Roy? Fucksake, say something please? Is it awful?"
"You look incredible," he finally says hoarsely. "Fucking incredible. Show me?" He takes your hand, urging you to turn around and show him the whole dress. When you stop in front of him again, his hand goes to the thigh high slit up the front of the dress. "I definitely can't wait to take this off."
"When's the car coming?" You ask, stepping into his arms.
"It should be outside." He leads you out. In the car, his hand slips under the split of your dress to rest on your bare thigh. "Remind me to take advantage of this later when you’re less fucking nervous."
~~~~~~~
Your grip on his hand gets progressively tighter the closer you get to the venue.
"Look at me?" He asks quietly, "It's going to be fine. They're going to love you. And god, you look gorgeous." You take the arm he offers at the start of the red carpet, you'd tried to skip it completely but you couldn't bear the thought of Roy having to do it alone. Photographers had also asked for Roy on his own but his response had been a very tame "No." Inside the venue, you spotted the only people you knew, the American coaches and Jamie both at opposite ends of the room. Once people noticed that Roy had not arrived alone, they seemed to all be looking at you at once.
"Royo my man, why don't I escort your lovely date inside and get a table, seems the fellas need you and it might be a bit like throwing this poor young lady to the lions. Maybe give them a Kent word of warning before you introduce them?" Coach Lasso kindly offered you his arm and before leaving your side, Roy checked in with you.
"Think I can cope with that." You smiled.
"I'll bring you a drink back." He kissed you softly and walked over to the first group of young men you'd seen out on the pitch. A couple of them clapped him on the back in greeting, looking over at you and then back to him. You could see from his profile how much he smiled. Ted led you into the ballroom which was decorated to perfection.
"This looks amazing." You breathe,
"It does, right? The boss likes to make it one of the best nights we have. She does a damn good job too."
"Wonder if I'll meet her," you muse.
"Oh you sure will, Faith Hill, she and our Roy are good friends so if he wants you to be meeting anyone tonight, it'll be her."
"Oh. Great," your smile falters just a little.
"She's an incredible woman. Lotta fences, but once you've hopped over those, it's like winning the Premier League. I'd imagine, anyway."
"Hopefully you'll get to find out. Only a couple of matches to go."
"That's right, Manchester next week and then West Ham." He's easy to talk to, friendly and sincere and he has you laughing so much you forget your unease. When Roy joins you with drinks, he doesn’t hesitate to kiss you in front of everyone, happy that you're happy.
"Right, the boys are on their best behaviour if they talk to you."
"You didn't need to do that."
"I did, the dickheads would have been bloody asking for your life story. No filter on 'em. You been OK with Ted?"
"Totally fine, we've been talking about work."
"Boring."
"We're both at an impasse. I need something new, he's not sure what to do. It's all very dramatic," you drink your wine and look around the room at the assembled guests, "I didn't get through the two interviews from the other week." You admit.
"Shit babe, I'm sorry. They're missing out, it's their loss."
"Thank you. Feels like a ticking clock looming over me."
"We can figure it out. I can help." You know he doesn't just mean financially, emotionally too, but your mind is focused on the practical issues first.
"I wouldn't want you to do that."
"I know. You might have to stop being so stubborn at least for a bit and actually accept help though." You run your fingers over his knuckles, his hand firmly in yours.
"I know. I'll think about it when I have to though, ok?" He nods. "No more boring talk. Who you going to introduce me to?" You look around again, Ted is talking to Rebecca over by the bar. He's making her laugh. "Think anything is happening there yet?" You ask, leaning in to talk quietly.
"Not yet, but I think she likes him too." You sigh,
"That's so cute. Look at how he looks at her."
"There is someone I want you to meet," he tells you, pulling you to your feet, "but only if you want to?" You laugh a little nervously.
"It's Keeley, isn't it?" He kisses you and it’s just slightly over the line of publicly appropriate.
"Only if you want to." He promises again. You might as well agree, it's easier to get it done sooner rather than later and every time you've looked at her she's been looking curiously at you. He leads you by the hand to where Keeley is sitting with Jamie and two other players.
"This is Keeley, Colin, Isaac and you already know Jamie." You smile warmly at them all and they welcome you to their table.
"I knew it!" Jamie grins, "you sly git, I knew something was going on the other week. Friends my arse! You look lovely, I like the Chelsea blue." He nudged Roy, clinking their beers together, you watched the smile bloom across Roy's face, it was infectious.
"It's lovely to see him so happy. You look fantastic!" Keeley teases.
"Makes our life easier too, y'know." Isaac laughed with Colin who readily agreed.
"Alright, alright. I'm not that bad." He grumbles. Everyone around you falls silent but you truly can't help the giggle that bubbles up and out until you're laughing so hard you can't catch your breath. They watch you for a second before Jamie breaks first, followed by Keeley. Colin and Isaac soon relax and laugh too.
"Oh babe, I honestly say this out of love, you are though!" You laugh again. Next to you, Jamie stops laughing straight away. Roy looks at you, his eyebrows furrowed.
"Next round on me. Wanna help me Roy?" Jamie asks and gets up from the table, Roy's hand just squeezes yours before he gets up. On the stage, Rebecca is welcoming the gala guests. Keeley turns to you and you grimace at what you think she's about to say.
"Don't worry, he just needs a minute to process that and wonder if you meant what he thinks you might mean. Better have an answer ready for later." She offers with a gentle smile. "So what do you do?" She's guiding you to a safe conversation topic but you're not quite sure why. Then it registers - your passing comment, her advice, and your eyes widen as you realise what you said, "I know. Spiral later, deep breath now." You try and relax, finishing your wine.
"I'm a deputy Comms Director. Well, I was. I quit recently so I'm looking for something new."
"Oh wow, I love working with internal Comms, you guys know exactly what you want. Makes my job so much easier!" She laughs and pulls you into a deep discussion about external PR and internal department politics. You glance at Roy occasionally, meeting his eyes more than once. His face is impassive, unreadable. He still holds your hand, thumb resting on your pulse point while he's in his own conversation with Isaac. Your table is visited frequently by other guests and you get introduced to many other people as the evening draws on. At the auction, Roy looks relieved and nudges against you,
"Thank fuck I don't get auctioned off anymore."
"Tell me about it, I couldn't afford you." You joke, brushing his lips in a brief kiss.
~~~~~~~
Once the auction is over, you excuse yourself to go to the bathroom. You're maneuvering yourself in the cubicle when you hear the doors open.
"You look cosy with Roy's new squeeze." You hear an elegant voice say.
"She's so fucking cute, Rebecca. Honestly. I hope he's ready for her because she could be the best thing that's ever happened to him."
"OK, that's not what I expected to hear from you. Really?"
"Really. We're friends, really good friends and yes, I loved him so much. But I wasn't the right person at the right time. Maybe she is. As long as he doesn't cock it up."
"Maybe your time hasn't happened yet? What if it's still to come?"
"All respect, Rebecca, I think how Roy and I go our separate ways is not too tricky to work out. You and Ted however…"
"There is no Ted and I."
"Exactly! That's my point, and my problem! You can't let him leave, babe!"
"I can't force him to stay either."
"Do you love him?" It's no good, you have to move. Doing so will make your presence known but you just have to suck it up. You emerge from the cubicle to see the two women sitting on a small sofa with a cocktail in hand. Keeley noticeably gasps so you hold your hands up in surrender.
"I'm sorry, I wasn't eavesdropping, I promise. I didn't realise what a nightmare it was going to be to go for a piss in this dress, it's so fucking big and there's so much sodding material-"
"I'm sorry," Keeley starts, Rebecca is watching the two of you with interest.
"Oh don't be, god it could have been worse! You could have said I was a right bitch, or not good enough for him. Believe me, I'll take what you said no problem." She sighs with relief.
"Thank fuck for that! Have you two met yet?"
"Not yet, you must be Roy's new girlfriend. Gorgeous dress." Rebecca reaches out to shake your hand.
"Thank you. Not sure I deserve that title just yet, it's early days."
"You like him, don't you?"
"Like him? She might have just admitted in a very roundabout way that she loves him, Rebecca!" Keeley squealed.
"Well then the girlfriend title definitely fits"
"Stop deflecting Welton, I asked you a question." Keeley got back to business. "Do you love Ted?" She looks at you and you make to leave,
"Don't mind me, I'll leave you both to it."
"Stay." She urges. "Yes, I think I am Keeley, and I don't know what to fucking do about it."
"Tell him!" You and Keeley both exclaim.
"You can't let him leave without telling him." You tell her.
"She can't let him leave at all, he's brilliant." Rebecca seems ready to give up on the discussion.
"I'm not going to let you both gang up on me. You should know better," she points at Keeley, "and you, I hardly know. No offence." She points at you. She leaves the bathroom first while you and Keeley linger.
"So, what I said about my feelings for Roy? Totally true, we're friends. I'm getting closer to Jamie again, but I don't know what that really means. The only thing I don't know for sure, is how Roy feels. We've been split up for nearly a year, there's no reason he should shy away from anything with you. But his mind works in mysterious ways. You're better off talking to him. My advice is to be honest and open with him no matter how scary it is." She's taken your hands while she talks and when she's finished, she wraps her tiny arms around you. You're not tall but she's so petite it's comical. "So, we should go and fucking dance?" She gives you a wicked grin. "Maybe we'll get lucky and Ted and Rebecca will start something on the dancefloor. God, I'd pay good money to see those pair bang!"
Roy is looking out for you from across the room as you leave the bathroom, he gives you a little salute.
"Keeley wants me to dance," you tell him, going for your drink.
"Told you you'd get along." He leans down to kiss you. "I get one later though." You join Keeley and half the team on the dancefloor where you spend the majority of the rest of the night. As the evening winds down, Roy takes you into his arms where your stay for song after song. You notice Rebecca and Ted out of the corner of your eye dancing together and turn both you and Roy so he can also see. "Fucking idiot should tell her." He chuckles, holding you tighter.
~~~~~~~
In the car on the way home, his hand finds its place on your thigh again. The quiet and the alcohol make you pensive, you're mulling over almost admitting that you love Roy, and Keeley's comment about making sure that he's moved on from her the same way she has from him.
"I'm sorry for saying what I did in front of everyone. It just fell out of my mouth, I didn't mean to ambush you with it." You start. He knows you're not done, you're worrying your bottom lip with your teeth, and you won't meet his eye. "Keeley's so beautiful, Roy. I mean, really so gorgeous." You'd never been one for comparing yourself to other women. You especially tried to avoid comparing yourself to the exes of someone new. You believed in the right person at the right time, and that exes helped shape a person. It had taken leaving Andy to help you regain who you were, for example, so like it or not - he had helped you become you. And so, you absolutely couldn't dislike Keeley, you knew that she'd helped Roy become this version of himself. She’d been so gracious, kind, and sweet during the evening, you’d had a lovely time. But that almost made it worse - comparing regular exes to footballers exes was like comparing apples and oranges. And try as you might, you weren't able to escape the fact that you were not a model. "I'm not her." You tell him, the worry evident in your voice. "What if she's the 'big love of your life’? I don't… I don't want to be a placeholder girlfriend. If you're not done with her, then I need to know." He didn't say anything for a long time, he keeps his hand on your leg while the car travels past the stadium and into his street. He thanks the driver, comes round to open your door and still hasn't said a word. He unlocks the front door and slips off his suit jacket before he turns to you. He takes your hand and guides you to sit you on the stairs and paces in front of you, rubbing his hand over his beard.
"If you'd asked me probably before Christmas, I think I would have said that I still had feelings for Keeley. But in the last six months, I've seen her change and I think I've changed too. Fuck it, I've tried to. I think it's crept up on me and I hadn't fucking realised it, but I am done with Keeley." He's still pacing methodically in front of you, making sure he says exactly what he wants to say, the way he wants to say it. "Properly done, I mean. I love having her as a friend, she's really good at that shit and I'd be lost without her. I could say the same about Jamie too but don't tell him, he's already a massive twat." He pauses to collect his thoughts. "She might have been the big love of my life… if my life had gone in a different direction. But it didn't. It's led me to you, and you could never be a placeholder girlfriend." It takes a couple of seconds but he kneels so that he's lower than eye level with you, leaning back on his heels. "I don't want you to be a placeholder girlfriend, I want you to be my fucking girlfriend, and I honestly say this out of love," you giggle through the tears that have started to fall, "you're a really good one." He leans up to kiss you. "Now please tell me that's the answer that covers all the shit that's been worrying you?" You kiss him back deeply, sliding forward on the step to bring your knees either side of him.
"I think that covers it. God, I really fucking love you." His laugh is magical,
"Fucking love you too. I love Lexie. I love that you can't park for shit and you're late for everything, and that you made my mum like you within about 5 minutes. She didn't even like me within 5 minutes." You kiss him again as his hands open up the split of your dress and slide up your thighs. He brings you further forward on the step and brings your underwear down your legs. "I'd spend the rest of my life on my knees worshipping you, even if it kills my bad knee." You lean back on your elbows as he brings his mouth to you and you believe every word he says.
~~~~~~~
#ted lasso#ted lasso fanfiction#ted lasso fic#mentions Tedbecca#roy kent#roy kent x reader#roy kent imagine#roy kent smut#roy kent x you#roy kent fic#roy kent fluff#roy kent fanfiction
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Jude’s love language??
i do like to think that with jude it’s also a little mixture. but this time between quality time and physical touch.
just imagine, how busy that man must be. he‘s always playing, always giving interviews and probably one of the most popular players on the entire time. if you see anything dortmund related, jude has to be around to represent the club as well.
so when he has a couple of hours or maybe even a day off, he will use any chance to spend time with you. even if it‘s just the chance to watch an episode of your favourite series, or to invite you on a coffee date in one of those sweet, hidden coffee shops which allowed you a little bit of privacy together.
days off are planned with you, without a doubt. he should be sprawled out on the couch and relax his exhausted muscles but instead, he‘s preparing something very sweet for you. like a home made dinner, or even picks you up from work or university to make sure, he has enough time with you before having to go back to his busy schedule again.
which also happens to be a reason for him to invite you to any game. make sure, you can travel to another town safely, mostly with him. after the game, you‘re the first person he goes to. just asking if he did good because your opinion matters the most to him.
so, any free minutes belongs to you.
also, physical touch. jude's addicted to your smile, and the way your cheeks are blemished by a soft cherry red when his lips place a lingering kiss on your jaw or your shoulder. little pecks all around your body. sometimes underneath the ear, some days just casually on the tip of your nose. jude always found a different place on your skin, his soft, pillow-like lips haven't came in contact yet.
he's such a hugger? he loves to have his arm around your waist, draped over your shoulder when a little alcohol infiltrated his system and made the situation much comfortable than the up-tight interview on the panel. fingertips always caressed over your skin, brushing your hair off your shoulder, drawing along your jaw, pulling your bottom lip away from the gnawing of your teeth because it would drive him insane.
with jude, it's truly the little things that matter the very most. small kisses, a slight touch on your bare back when the dress has a nice cutout, standing behind you to protect you from any incoming damage, placing a chaste kiss on the crown of your hair and whispering sweet little nothings..
#football blurb#football imagine#football drabble#football fans#german football#jude bellingham imagine#jude bellingham blurb#jude bellingham x you#jude bellingham drabble#jude bellingham x reader#jude bellingham#borussia dortmund x reader#borussia dortmund imagine#borussia dortmund#borussia bvb#bvb dortmund#bvb imagines#drabbleland#requested
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Do you have any favorite naruto fics you’d recommend? Any pairing, complete or not, on-hiatus, gen, oneshots, anything is fine lol
I was legitimately just pruning my bookmarks the other day!! thank you so much for asking.
I don't read too much fanfic these days, and I'm picky when I do--only about grammar/punctuation and immersion though. I ship a LOT of stuff (I guess The Youth would call me a proshipper) and although I never read darkfic, I don't shy away from weirder kinks and unhealthy relationship stuff.
categorizing by pairing, if applicable. some of them are smutty, and please note that the first 3 come from FFN which doesn't have a tagging system, but there is some SA CW I'll give in advance.
KAKASAKU | my first OTP! formative fics that totally reshaped my understanding of what fanfiction could be, and how well-written chemistry can make it or break it
HOUSE OF CROWS is the quintessential kakasaku fanfic. it was written during shippuden and so is canon divergent because of that, but also tells a comprehensive story of its own right that is intriguing and well planned. excellent characterization and world building. leaves me gutted in the best way on my yearly reread.
DUTY BEFORE HONOR is another silvershine classic. I don't reread is as often as House of Crows but they are just about equal in quality. again, the chemistry between them is off the charts, and the world feels so alive.
WILL OF FIRE for me is up there with House of Crows in being essential kakasaku reading. cynchick is a multisaku champion and a wonderful storyteller. the stakes in this one are stressful, the romance tense and believable, and we once again get lovely world building and great chemistry.
ITAKISA | a pairing near and dear to me, because men who do everything wrong are so deeply relatable. they both know they don't deserve anything good ever again but they found each other!!!! ARE YOU GUYS SEEING THIS--
A SHARK HIDDEN INN THE LEAVES doesn't have my favorite version of Kisame, but he's plenty close enough. it's a lengthy oneshot that got me into certain *ahem* kinks. it is a very fun and wild fic that is entirely self-aware of how absurd it's being, and manages to have nothing but sincerity at the same time (and I highly recommend the author's other stories as well)
AN ORCHESTRA PLAYING ON, INSANE is a modern AU (extremely rare in my bookmarks) that absolutely tore my heart out. god is it SO much to ask for these losers to be happy?! yes, it is, and I love every moment of it
MADAMITO | a rarepair I am SUCH a sucker for that has some of the most talented authors writing for it. lots of them have ot3 elements between them and hashirama, often angsty, but stuff like that is part of the appeal for me, lol
A HANDFUL OF SKY is an unfinished fic that I genuinely think about like once a week. if it ever updates then I will be over the moon. technically hashimadamito but it hadn't quite gotten there yet
LIKE ALTARS is just such a beautiful piece of writing, mostly on madara. it is everything, that is all
BLOOD AND RIVER WATER is more mito-centric but has one of my favorite madaras of all time
YOURS ARE RATTLED BONES is another short, mito-centric but gut-wrenching piece featuring the opposite type of madara from the last one
OTHER | character-centric stuff that isn't necessarily shippy but also doesn't have a very "gen" vibe either?
A SERPENT IN THE RICE is a little series about orochimaru that makes me feel so so so many things. highly recommended
HERETIC is such a love letter to kushina, and kurama too. cannot stress enough how much I adore this one
there's a few others that I probably won't link on tumblr, mostly unhealthy and/or "problematic" smut hhfhdj but maybe I'll make a public rec list on ao3 for these different categories and stuff like that.
but yeah that's pretty much it!!! I know it's not a huge list with a lot of variety but it's what I've enjoyed over the last 15+ years in the naruto fandom.
#user728299292#kakasaku#kisaita#madamito#I am SOOOO hesitant to tag all this stuff because I know how divisive kksk is. but sakura has been a grown adult in canon for 10 years now#so yknow. here I am. tagging kksk out in the open!!#also sorry I know I've been writing a lot of madasaku lately but I really don't read it at all...same with itasaku. mostly because those 2#have a really specific vibe that I prefer to read with them. that other people just don't typically have...so I wrote them how I wanted LMA#I'm so incredibly choosy with characterization and prose. it's gotta 'feel' right. I gotta feel like I'm stepping into another world#and ask literally anyone in my life...the dialogue CANNOT be bad#and my bar for bad is pretty high admittedly LMAO like ask ANYONE in my life...and this applies to movies tv shows books and fanfic#if the dialogue is trash I will DNF that shit soooo fast regardless of how interesting I found the premise/summary#ok ok I think that's all ENJOY!!!!#asks
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