#but imo its more shes had to pick her battles and make do with things in her life she could not change

[ladystoneboobs]

@sunflowersansa, #catelyn was raised to be hosters successor for almost a decade wasnt she?

the annoying thing is we don't have an approximate age for edmure, nor any age for cat when minisa died (in childbirth with a last, stillborn son, not edmure). i've seen fanart depicting him as anywhere from a toddler to a younger teen/tween when catelyn and lysa were teenagers. but i feel pretty confident in my estimation of ~7/8yrs age difference between eldest sister and baby brother, and not just bc of symmetry with the next generation. my reasoning is thus:

we all assume catelyn had some grooming as an heiress, rather than it just being a nominal status in early childhood. how much training can one really give a 3 or 4yo, y'know? we know rickon never had any manly lord lessons from ned since he was still so young when they parted. if she was closer to 7 or 8 when edmure came along, that leaves more realistic time for education, and a sizable number of years with only daughters for hoster to try to accustom himself to lack of a son and make do accordingly. even only 1 or 2 years of rulership lessons would still matter when minisa's death left hoster more dependent on her as not just hostess but later a trusted confidant of a sort until she got married.

ned thinks of edmure as "the boy" in his pov when hearing of the mountain's first attacks in the riverlands. we know ned's not great with keeping up with ageing from his earlier comments about tommen, and he surely hasn't seen edmure in many years, but this tells me that when they did meet at riverrun, edmure was not that close in age to himself, catelyn, and lysa. (i think it's less likely to see someone as frozen in childhood if they're anywhere near your age cohort.) ned could still be wrong about edmure's age thinking he couldn't possibly be at least 25 and any green knight younger than that was still a boy or youth, but that miscalculation makes more sense to me if he was around ~26 rather than a fellow thirtysomething or a guy pushing thirty.

we also know that edmure acted as brandon's squire in his duel with littlefinger, which i read as more someone playacting at some squirely practice when not yet consideed old enough to be anyone's assigned squire, with the informal nature of the duel which meant lightly-armored littlefinger having no squire of his own, and brandon having an actual squire who likely could have been present. so that lines up with a ~10yo edmure to 15yo littlefinger, 16yo lysa, 18yo catelyn, and 20yo brandon. (this is admittedly the most subjective point and i wouldn't consider it strong evidence if not consistent with the rest.)

catelyn doubted her memories of her mother, including her appearence, which in this world strangely devoid of portraits, still makes me think she was quite young when they lost her. so, yeah, not a large gap between edmure's birth and minisa's death in her next childbirth. if catelyn was 8/9 or even 10 when her mother died and she became de facto lady of riverrun, that could line up with the lannister twins losing their mother at 7 and not having strong memories of joanna.

idt catelyn really did think of riverrun as her birthright when her brief time as conscious heiress was a small fraction of her life, with at least 6yrs knowing she'd move away to be lady (consort) of winterfell instead and the rest of her life living out that responsibility as northern wife and mother. but it must still sting to be used to such a position of importance in her earlier time in riverrun and have no real authority when she returned to live there again as an adult, especially when edmure still seemed to act (to her) like the baby of the family not entirely matured into the authority he held all for himself. there's a part in her time in renly's camp when she thought robb was years younger but still knew what he was doing more than the southern king and his knights of summer playing at war. i'd imagine a simaliar feeling whenever edmure annoyed her. that's another difference between robb and edmure, that robb was a dutiful eldest sibling like his mother, formerly catelyn's baby but never anyone's baby brother. while edmure, even if he was (my by headcanon) a few years older than renly and unlike renly was meant to be a male heir from birth, was still a youngest child of 3 like renly.

[kradogsrats]

This might be spoilers for what happens later in your Lissa centric fic but do you ever see Sarai as a better leader than Harrow was in Canon?

Interesting question! I feel like when a lot of the fandom looks at Sarai, they see her anti-dark magic stance and challenge of Harrow's characterization of the magma titan as a "monster" as her most prominent character moments and interpret that as her primary character trait being compassion for all people and creatures, like a fully-matured version of "incapable of killing" Rayla.

Which like... fair! The series goes out of its way to associate them, two characters who will never meet, to the point of Rayla repeating Sarai's lines. Also "Does it think? Does it feel? Does it have a family? Is it the last of its kind?" is a real banger, hitting right at the one of the deepest core themes of the story, so it's not surprising that it's what stays in everyone's head. But the really important line for understanding her as queen in relation to Harrow as king is later in the scene: "You said you want to build a better world, to really change things, but that's going to take decades of hard work. There's no monster you can slay and solve all your problems." The novel has an additional sentence in there to reinforce the point: "There's a special kind of courage that you need for consistency and perseverance."

Both Harrow and Sarai are interested in systemic change. The novel describes them as having had "long, late-night discussions" during which they planned how they were going to solve the problems they identified. (All of this kind of says something about King Atticus, too.) However, she self-describes in narration as an "optimistic realist" to Harrow's "idealist." She believes that as king and queen, they can change the world—but it may take a lifetime, and will involve a lot of hard decisions.

Really, I think the key difference between them is life experience. Sarai married Damian and chose to have a child with him, fully knowing that he almost definitely wouldn't live to see that child grow up. Harrow, when they meet, has probably never had a serious relationship. Sarai comes from a military background (IMO), so she has both given and taken orders she might not fully agree with—something we see from her accompanying Harrow on the mission. She made her case to him, he made his decision, and she follows through on that decision without a single complaint, even though we know it's one she dislikes. Harrow, as he knows, was born a prince—for all his training, it's unlikely anyone gave him orders, and they probably took his opinion as having more weight. He's somewhat aware of his privilege compared to most of his subjects, and kind of overcompensates with his ideas of compassion and servitude.

Not to go all American politics on everyone, but it's kind of the same misunderstanding a lot of liberals have about the presidency—if we can just get the right person into that seat, they'll be able to tell everyone that [insert social policy] and it'll happen. The reality, as Sarai knows, is that big changes takes years of lobbying, boots-on-the-ground activism, and lots of little changes that still require fighting tooth and nail to get them done. She's absolutely right that it takes a special kind of courage to do that work and keep doing it without falling into despair and resentment. You also have to know how to pick your battles, something that Harrow is definitely not used to doing.

Ultimately I do think Sarai would probably be more successful than Harrow was as sole ruler, if that was a situation that somehow occurred, BUT it's important that she never denigrates Harrow's idealism or thinks of him as naive. I think she values it, and loves him for it—for things like "reject history as a narrative of strength, and instead have faith that it can be a narrative of love," which is 100% pure Harrow. Like Harrow believes she makes him better, I think she believes that he makes her better. Sarai's more effective but Harrow's more inspirational. So, idk... make of that what you will.

[ripgray-moved]

ok this question might be a lil wild and feel free to delete but how different do you think things would have gone if the order of who died changed? Like for example Annie died before the dad

this is an interesting question because i ultimately think the message of the movie— or at least the underlying themes and motifs?— would change entirely if the deaths were switched around.

bluntly put, if charlie wasn't the first to die, the movie would be a cliche. 'weird, probably evil kid does weird, probably evil things' again. like please. we've seen this a bajillion times; not that it can never be good, but hereditary is so good because it breaks a lot of horror molds / uses cliches in transformative ways ( for example, they use my beloathed bird-jumpscare— except SURPRISE, the bird is actually relevant because paimon lore, gotcha you punk). charlie is also the single character that this family unites over. though they're all stunted and can't talk to one another for shit, they all show aligned concern for charlie. if she isn't to die first, there's no sense of cohesion to this family's suffering whatsoever. it'd arguably be a very different movie in that, if annie died first as the direct descendant of ellen for example, peter might be battling a very different type of guilt, as i'm sure there's a part of him that'd honestly be relieved. that's a very different, much less sympathetic story.

if annie died before steve, the movie's name and central theme would make no sense. the reason steve appears so "normal" beside the other family members is because he is not, genetically, part of this bloodline. 'hereditary' as a title is talking about the inherited curse of paimon through ellen, yes, but it's also in reference to mental health and the cycle of abuse. if steve was to outlive annie, not only does the potency of paimon's ritual lose its edge ( steve is not even a necessary death; steve is used to destroy annie so that paimon can possess her. his death is an example of paimon's cruelty and his twisted sense of humour. the actual sacrifices of the ritual are ellen, annie and charlie ) but it recontextualises the end chase sequence entirely. it makes it tons more heartbreaking imo too, as peter and his dad do have some sort of positive connection, even if it's very strained. i think it would hurt him more to have his dad be the one in annie's position come the end of the film, strictly because he expects ithis degree of ire from his mother. i also feel like paimon might have had a tough time breaking steve to begin with. he very clearly thinks annie's lost her mind to grief, does not believe in this demon stuff. i think if she died before him, he might actually stand a chance of interfering with the ritual. maybe? not that he'd necessarily succeed, but the chance would go from 0 to like. 0.4 lmfao.

if steve was the first to die? looking away from the obvious problems i mentioned above ...uh. i genuinely believe this family's so fucked up that they'd go to his funeral, mourn obviously, and then just kind of. pretend it didn't happen when they're around one another. peter pretends the accident doesn't happen when it does. annie pretends she didn't threaten peter and charlie's life ( she acknowledges that it happened but doesn't treat it with the severity that it deserves ). charlie doesn't understand much of anything because of how stunted paimon's possession makes her.

tl;dr: i don't think much would change from a story perspective, strictly because, from the very first frame of the movie, the graham family are displayed as dolls as opposed to living people. implying that their fate is already decided. the game has been picked and paimon is simply moving his pieces in the necessary directions to see it all through. changing the order of things would just fuck up the story imo.

[powerpolyculeshowdown]

Lime for the poll runners’ ask game?

Lime -> participant(s) you’re rooting for the most?

i don't want to sway the votes so i won't do any propaganda for them after the poll starts BUT it's Wu Zetian/Li Shimin/Gao Yizhi from Iron Widow i just love the way their relationship develops so much and as someone whos unable to actually pick up a book and focus on it, the fact that i read iron widow in 4 days is amazing im still proud of that as silly as it is

yknow what ill use this as an opportunity to ramble about them askdgakdjk spoilers ahead but ill try to keep the major stuff out

for context the book has pacific rim style mechas, but instead of being drift compatible or whatever its usually a male pilot and his concubine whose life force he usually drains in order to pilot the thing, but theres a LOT of propaganda that makes girls want to be concubines, or families might wanna send their daughters for the money. im simplifying it a LOT especially cause theres more info u only learn later on as zetian herself finds out but anyway

at the start of the book zetian and yizhi are besties who obviously have feelings for each other. zetian is poor while hes very rich so their friendship is kind of a secret and they meet in the woods which i think is cute, point is its p clear zetian tries to mantain a distance, not allowing herself to admit her feelings. for reasons i wont say zetian decided to become a concubine to one of the like bigger more badass guys even if she doesnt believe the propaganda and knows she might die, she only tells yizhi this the day before

he shows up at her house the next day begging her family to let him marry her?????? which is sweet because he wants to protect her but that isnt gonna work bestie sorry she's a woman w a mission

so anyway she goes to the concubine thing and shes surprisingly powerful "for a girl" which yeah thats a super common trope but shes so much more than just the strong protagonist. shes extremely powerful in every sense of the word imo and i love her so much and i wish the world hadnt been so cruel that she had to become so strong. but anyway the guy she wants to pilot w picks her. MAJOR SPOILER they have to pilot the mecha on day 1 cause they're under attack and uhhh she kills him lol lmao she drains her life force instead which supposedly is UNHEARD OF

so they cant just kill her off cause that'd look bad instead they send her to be the concubine of the strongest guy (all of his concubines die after 1 fight) and thats Li Shimin my beloved my little meow meow hes looked down on and kinda treated like an animal cause hes a criminal and the only reason he gets to be a pilot is his powerful qi. anyway shes forced to live w him and turns out hes just a lil guy. like hes very big and scary looking but hes just a tired man pls he needs a break. she fucking survived piloting w him which nobody expected. so now theres a lotta stuff going on i wont get into but some ppl arent happy w this duo cause they're both very powerful and not exactly happy to serve. and Shimin has a drink problem.

IN ENTERS GAO YIZHI hes back babey!!! and he decides to help shimin w his alcoholism. its funny cause when they first meet his crush on li shimin is so fucking obvious zetian is like "huh i always suspected he liked guys too" but li shimin is just pissed cause this is the guy who wants to make him stop drinking

theres like 1 moment of jealousy that i can remember when li shimin realizes zetian and yizhi have a thing going on but its settled very quickly and they all kiss.

back to the drift compatible thing: at one point in the final battle zetian and shimin need more power and yizhi literally lends them his qi (its extremely rare for a third person to help) and its beautiful and they are so in love and i cant wait for the sequel

idk if any of that is coherent i kinda stopped thinking and just typed sorry for rambling on ur ask im just very passionate about them i love them so much i love iron widow so much i love xiran jay zhao so much (the writer) (you might know them from the live action mulan analysis video that went viral back when that movie came out) (check out their yt channel)

[rayplaysotomes]

and finally, the lupin post. as usual, this is reformatted from my picsart otome route posts that i make whenever i finish a route. 

spoiler warning for lupin’s route in code: realize guardian of rebirth under the cut!

first of all, not a lot of otome games (at least ones ive played) leave one route to be the final and wont even let you unlock it until youve completed the others but with that being said. i think lupins route is absolutely worth it and definetely fitting as the final route. its very rewarding, especially in how it wraps up the story iin  satisfying manner, while still leaving you curious and wanting to play more. 

also. lupin is such a charismatic character with so much personality and charm. hes very entertaining to watch. i do wish we had gotten a little more on his backstory or something to give him just a biiiittt more depth other than one monologue but regardless, hes still a very likeable character overall. 

one of the things i noticed right off the bat (and something i almost always mention in these posts) was the romantic aspects. phenomenal. him and cardia just have so much chemistry and it works so well. that whole scene with cardia confiding in him about how she was a monster and he assured her that she was huma. and then they said they loved each other. dude. or on the airship when he kisses her hat??????? they just work so well together.

i also loved how his route like? combines certain aspects and endings from other routes. like we get to see the antagonists from other routes and each character dealing with them on the nautilus. very fitting for the final route. 

also throughout this whole route, i really liked impey and victors dynamic. like i had first sorta noticed it in ch 8 right before the route starts when they go off talking together about science and engineering, then later in lupins route they seem to have gotten closer and often fight together during battles, for example, the fight with nemo on the nautilus. idk. i just really enjoy their dynamic. 

also finis. good lord. there was. so much interesting information about him in this route. you can sorta pick up on this from other routes, but in this one you really start to see just how bad his inferiority complex is. and its extremely well written imo. like hes done so much for his father, yet isaac still likes cardia more, and obviously thats hard for him to understand. so he takes it out on cardia as if its her fault. and he does whatever hes told in hopes that when isaac’s plan is finally put into action, his father will love him. i also really like the way they build up and leave hints towards him being immortal in the other routes (esp vans), but you dont really understand how it works until this route when he finally explains it and its just. literally terrifying. like that scene is INSANE.

i also really liked the monologue talking about isaac, his wife, and cardia and finis as kids. its just. very interesting. 

and quick bonus from the picsart post i made when i had finished everything including extra scenarios since i had saved them for the end:

just fully finished guardian of rebirth including extra scenarios and i will never emotionally recover from this. this game is seriously. so beautiful. like theres no other word to describe it. its just so beautiful through and through. like. there has only been one other otome game that ive been so thoroughly invested in. its taken me a long time to finish it purely because ive grown so extremely attatched to these characters. (so long infact, that theres no impey route post because i played his before i even started to do these posts) i am. beyond excited to play future blessings and wintertide miracles. 

this is so cringefail but. i simply love this game and these characters and this story. also, floatable is. absolutely one of the best otome ops imo. iconic. and code realize has got to have one of my favourite ensembles out of any media imo. like lupin gang is up there with the rfa. their dynamic is just so perfect. these characters are so complex and beautifully written and just so so entertaining to watch. this game is so perfect. 

[feltpool]

Inside Army

I'm thinking back to Nala Se's choice of phrasing back when she told Tarkin about the 'enhanced' clones. She said '5 are all that remain' and we take that to mean there are only 5 of her special clones who survived this far through the process.

But is it actually '5 are all that are still present at this location'?

Are there others, like Emerie, who had been shipped out via the backdoor landing platform connected to Nala Se’s private lab (you know, the one Omega ‘happened’ to know about?) to infiltrate other areas such as key positions of interest within the Republic, which unexpectedly became the Empire, like their science divisions, to get a foothold on the inside because they can hide in plain sight in a way that standard clones could never hope to because their faces are a dead giveaway?

I've said before that Omega would make a good infiltration model, being all young, pretty and unassuming looking, as well as ‘somehow’ managing to be socialised in a way that none of the male clones have ever been, not to mention the ‘completely unique for Kamino’ accent, despite her claim that she’s spent most of her life locked up in a secret laboratory and should have had no way to pick either of those things up in the same way that most children would do. Not only does everyone know that the clone army is entirely male and nigh identical looking. But looking like a child too? That has its uses, no one ever looks twice at her. Not even inside the Senate buildings.

And she shows signs of having had training she has no apparent reason to have ever had, like the accuracy she displays with a blaster half her body size despite her claim that she’s never used one before. So why wouldn't her sisters also have been as fully trained as any of their brothers?  Tech doesn't look like much, and nor does Emerie, but that's camouflage for you. It helps you to blend in and not be noticed until it’s too late.

Now it's possible that it was Omega's technical skills that served Nala Se best and meant that she got to remain at Tipoca City after the others had been dispatched to their new positions, but it’s more likely (IMO) that she was keeping her ageing retarded (see what they’re doing there?) assistant close at hand for further observation since she’s ‘not like other girls’ and may also have been keeping her under observation to see whether that effect lasted in the long term or not.

So does the Mother Talzin analog have an army of not-quite-Nightsisters out there in positions of power just waiting for the time to strike against their enemy?

Will we get an Empire vs Kaminoan battle royale to mirror the Dathomir showdown between Dooku and Talzin?

When Krell set brother against brother it was an appalling travesty, but clones vs non-clones could be an amazing episode/arc that does some real damage to the Empire from the inside and allows Crosshair and friends to escape from Daro before Hemlock can pseudo Blue Shadow Virus the lot of them.

And Emerie might be able to help with that problem too.

[lacomandante]

        i think the biggest hang up i have when it comes to writing sharpe fics is the historical accuracy (adhd brain aside).I feel like I have to continuously start and stop bc there is just so much shit to look up and it ruins my creative flow and chips at my confidence. I have more pressure (that admittedly I put on myself, no one else does) bc this is set during a real period of history, I want to get it right. and yet it’s one of the hardest fucking things, imo, to research--but mostly for Teresa.

        i write a character who is a partisan, of which there’s very little primary sources except for those who were nobles and more prominent (ie; espoz y mina) while most were peasants. of those sources, most are either very specific to a region or in old fashioned spanish when spanish is already hard enough for me to read.

        not only that, it’s fucking hard to find anything on spanish culture and society during this time period or just before it. I can find things from the 18th century, but not the turn of the century nor pre-invasion of the French. I specifically had to buy a three volume out of print set of Manners of Spain, 1818 which they had to print and bind by hand bc none exist anymore. It’s so hard to find time period accurate stuff specific to Spain that isn’t about the english regency and it drives me up the wall. its hard to feel confident when there’s so much i don’t know and i feel like i’m groping blindly in the dark when it comes to specific, important aspects of Teresa’s life.

        and then there’s dates, geography, battles, skirmishes, how weapons work, travel, etc. little nuances that to me are important to get right. i’m also not religious at all, so even basic catholic things i know little about which is important culturally as well. i have more to bitch about when it comes to writing teresa but i’m sleepy and can’t remember all of it.

        i do love her though, and i do love writing for this fandom. i’m a whore for nitty gritty details which is why I think it’s such a challenge for me. there’s both too much information and not enough and it’s exhausting to make sure everything’s accurate. trying to write a fic about the retreat from talavera where i’m like, nobody says where in fucking portugal wellington retreats to? which building is it, if it’s in lisbon?? surely someone would note an important place like that. wait, when does sharpe leave to confirm his captaincy? how long is he in england? how will this work on the timeline?

       or like other things- the partisans were so vast and varied information can be all over the place. what was the Moreno wealth built on? why was teresa not married before she married sharpe? Could she have inherited the family business as the eldest daughter? what was she doing in galicia and how does she know vivar, or how did she meet hogan? how important is religion in her life, and how does it change after the french come? how would her transition from lady to partisan be when i don’t have any information on wtf society and culture were like? how would she transition after the war?? so many things

        i think the most important thing for me to remember is that while accuracy can be important (and will bug the shit out of me if i’m not 100% certain) it’s not the end all be all. It’s what the scene is trying to convey that matters the most. i have both the film and the book canon that i can pick and choose from at will to make work. The films leave so much out and yet add a lot in (especially for Teresa- the books are okay, but I’m 100% film based Teresa while adding her brother in), and even the author makes places and events up to get Plot Things happening. I can make shit up to make things happen to and am not beholden to history or accuracy, though i can get close to it. i think i can be forgiven as long as i love the characters and the stories i write for them.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 324: Is There a Force Field Around Him??

Previously on BnHA: Flashback!Rat Principal was all “please tell Midoriya that I spent a concerningly small amount of money upgrading U.A. into a wacky physics-defying funtime grid so as to make the final battle much more confusing for everyone.” Present Day!Mic (or Present!Mic, if you will) and Jeanist were all “if only somebody could deescalate this dangerously unhinged mob, we’ve tried nothing and we’re all out of ideas.” Ochako was all “LISTEN UP PEOPLE.” The mob was all, “god??” Ochako was all, “NO, IT’S ME, OCHAKO. I’M REALLY HIGH UP ON THIS BUILDING AND THE VISIBILITY IS LOW DUE TO THE RAIN, SO I CAN SEE HOW YOU MIGHT MAKE THAT MISTAKE. ANYWAYS, DEKU WAS OUT THERE RISKING HIS LIFE FOR YOU CLOWNS EVEN THOUGH HE’S JUST A KID, SO I WOULD REALLY APPRECIATE IF YOU COULD ALL REMEMBER HOW TO BE DECENT HUMAN BEINGS, THANKS.” Let’s see if her Big Scolding Energy has any impact.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi is all “so I have this speech planned out, and it’s really good, but it also only really needs about 6 to 8 pages, but I’m gonna see if I can stretch it out to 17 pages so I can kill time before we get to the next volume cliffhanger two weeks from now.” Anyway but it really is a good speech though. There are feels, and tears, and more talk about how Deku is so in need of a shower that just looking at him requires a tetanus booster, and more feels, and more tears, and bonus ship drama, and an iconic callback to the very first chapter which reframes the entire series in a new context in a totally epic and moving way, and it’s all very good. Except that Horikoshi is determined to never let anyone actually give this kid a hug. Who hurt you, dude.

omg we are opening on a callback to chapter 212, a.k.a. the chapter with by far the cutest flashback that doesn’t involve any baby Todorokis

baby Ochako is lethally cute. she could literally murder someone with her cuteness. I just want to scoop her up and play airplane with her until she accidentally activates her quirk while we’re spinning around and we both helicopter up into the air never to be seen again

“a child’s insistence” huh well that’s all well and good, but I sure hope this doesn’t mean we’re going to drag out the whole “sternly lecture the obnoxious citizens” plot for another whole chapter. no offense but I think we’re good

so page 2 is just continuing the whole happy/worried faces monologue, which of course is very important to Ochako’s character as it provides the context for why “who protects the heroes” ended up becoming her thing. and this is making me think we actually are in for a whole second chapter of this sob. when will my boy finally get to rest

OH MY GOD SUDDENLY THESE PEOPLE HAVE EYES IMAGINE THAT

HORIKOSHI: [reaches for a box of tissues while tearfully penning an homage to his beloved Spider-Man 2, specifically the train scene where the crowd sees Peter without his mask and they suddenly realize just how young he is]

HORIKOSHI’S HOMAGE SCENE: “COME TO THINK OF IT, I GUESS IT WAS KIND OF MEAN FOR US TO PICK ON THIS TEN YEAR OLD KID WHO WEIGHS 75 POUNDS AND LOOKS LIKE HE LOST A FIGHT WITH SATAN’S MOLDY OLD BASEMENT”

lol at this one guy who can feel the mood of the crowd shifting and is all “WAIT, NO, I WANTED TO KEEP BEING AN ASSHOLE DAMMIT”

as many pointed out last week, this man is wearing an All Might shirt. that’s some fantastic irony there

-- SDKFJWIGKS

“LITTLE GIRL, I HOPE YOU’RE NOT SUGGESTING THAT WE SHOULD ALL BE WALKING AROUND DRESSED LIKE A SOVIET-ERA BUS STOP.” heh. last week I said I was ashamed of BnHA being my favorite manga. that was a lie, actually

(ETA: in the original Japanese Ochako’s next two lines are basically “the only ones covered in mud will be us heroes!” followed by “please give us some time to get rid of the mud”, with that second line basically being the single funniest thing I’ve ever read rdslkjl. Ochako thank you so much for supporting my running gags. “YEAH WE KNOW HE’S DIRTY. WE ARE GONNA TRY AND CLEAN HIM UP, BUT IT MAY TAKE A WHILE, I’M JUST SAYING. I MEAN LOOK AT HIM. HE LOOKS LIKE AN ASBESTOS COSPLAY.”)

doesn’t the megaphone kind of look ever so slightly like an axe that she’s wielding maniacally here

easy there Lizzie Borden

also that’s a really bold claim to make there. and not one she necessarily should have to make, either. but as we all know, there’s nothing that shounen manga likes more than having its heroes bravely hoist heavy burdens of responsibility like good self-sacrificing citizens

p.s. lowkey loving how Kacchan is positioned here standing slightly behind Deku. not presuming to stand in front of him all overprotectively (because he would hate if anyone ever did that to him), and kind of being unobtrusive and letting others take center stage -- but still being close enough to Deku that he can catch him if he stumbles or passes out again

(ETA: or maybe not lmao.

DEKU: [falls to his knees]

KACCHAN: [glancing up from his phone a few minutes later] “someone just sent me the stupidest meme about milk crates -- oh. uh. you good...?”

really, son. “the burdens you can’t carry, we’ll carry them for you. ...later, I mean. right now it’s late, and we’re all cold and wet.”)

also lowkey loving this OchaTsu moment here

I was going back and binging Ochako chapters this past week for reasons, and I gotta say it really stuck out to me just how often these two are paired with each other. they do everything together. it’s a really sweet friendship that often goes unappreciated but it’s very cute

meanwhile, not to be outdone by the OchaTsu, Iida is staring at Ochako with open admiration talking about how she’s fighting too. it’s been so long since we’ve had any IidaRaka you guys. I was starving and I didn’t even know it

oh my lord IT’S FINALLY HAPPENING

THE LIGHT IS BACK. he finally looks like him again. what a cathartic fucking moment omg

ffklkdw

“I KNOW YOU ARE ALL SCARED, BUT THE GOOD NEWS IS, WE DEFINITELY CANNOT GUARANTEE YOUR SAFETY AND WE ARE ALL SCARED TOO!” good pep talk there kiddo

BUT, jokes aside, truth be told this is the exact right approach to take imo, and something that’s long overdue. I’ve said this before, but this new generation of heroes is shaping up to be much more transparent than the All Might generation. they’re basically abandoning the almighty, untouchable Superman “heroes as gods” concept in favor of the more nuanced “heroes as people” concept instead. and that’s a good thing. seeing their heroes as humans, with human limitations and weaknesses and flaws, will hopefully not only lead to more scrutiny and accountability, but also more awareness of how hard some of them are working and how much they’re sacrificing. that’s something All Might never quite grasped back at the start of the series -- that the weak, vulnerable, injured him could be just as inspiring as the mighty, invincible him -- perhaps even more so. there’s a power in seeing otherwise ordinary people show extraordinary bravery and compassion. it inspires others to try and do the same

SSDLHK AIZAWA SIGHTING AAHHHHHH

so he was still back at the hospital this whole time?? smdh at this disrespect. that feeling when your sexy self-insert character’s powers of rationality are too strong, and so you have to nerf him so that he doesn’t ruin your Deku Angst arc twice over by (1) immediately talking some sense into Deku and making him come home Right This Instant Young Man, and (2) not allowing him to leave U.A. in the first fucking place. excuse me, you want to do WHAT now, Midoriya?? that’s it, go to your room

also living for Katsuki and Hawks’s soft expressions. Shouto’s too, although his is tinier and harder to see. and Jeanist’s 12-foot-long neck. imagine Jeanist’s head with Mic’s hair. maybe Jeanist had a mohawk back in the day and that’s why U.A.’s doors are so big now

speaking of soft faces, Enji’s is also excellent

what could this random close-up possibly imply?? hell if I know. but Horikoshi truly fears no discourse and that’s what I love about him

OMGGGG

“smh my child is so dumb.” poor Ochadad. your child is cute af count your blessings

SDOFFHSMH

I’m telling you guys. lethally, catastrophically cute

this speech is still ongoing lol. Horikoshi you’re doing so good but I think we get the point now my dude. you gotta learn how to transition out of these things

UNEXPECTED TOGA WHAT

“there we go” Horikoshi says, crossing off the last line on his list of Ochako ships. “that’s all of ‘em”

poor Ochako is just repeating the same “LET HIM REST, PLEASE, WITH EVERYONE’S COOPERATION, IF YOU DON’T MIND, WE APPRECIATE IT” talking points over and over again hoping someone will throw her a bone and acknowledge her already. SOMEONE PLEASE HELP HER

literally they’re all just staring up at her silently omg. work with me people!!

now she’s saying it for the 56th time but more dramatically all of a sudden

they got so dramatic that for a minute I thought she had suddenly leaped off the building or something

look, not to rush you or anything Horikoshi, but I’m starting to get the feeling that this is yet another one of those “the volume is ending soon so I need to either hurry things up or slow things down in order to make sure we end it on my perfect cliffhanger ending” chapters where you go to ridiculous lengths to drag things out much to the exasperation of your week-to-week readers

(ETA: ftr, volume 31 ended on chapter 306, and I’m predicting that vol. 32 will end with chapter 316 (a.k.a. “you’re next!” [explodes]). I’m guessing vol. 33 will follow suit and likely end on chapter 326, so keep your eyes peeled for a big cliffhanger in two weeks’ time. Deku’s dad?? All Might in peril?? U.A. traitor at long fucking last?? we shall see.)

is Deku straight up falling in love with Ochako right on the spot lol what is happening

I know I just said that I enjoy when Horikoshi gives zero fucks about discourse, but shipping discourse is a whole different beast lol. I hope he’s prepared

(ETA: and for the record, I have no interest in shipping discourse either, as always. and I think this scene can be interpreted as platonic, tbh, with the context being that Ochako was literally introduced as someone who was willing to help him so casually without a second thought, and now here she is saving him again.

I don’t think it really fully hit Deku until this moment how much he needed saving. like I said in another meta somewhere, selflessness is basically just selfishness on behalf of others. and Deku is selfless to a fault, but that’s okay, and it doesn’t mean he needs to change -- he just needs friends who are willing to be be selfish on his behalf in turn. and I think the full emotion of what it means to have friends like that just hit him at last. everything his friends have done for him, how much he needed it and didn’t even realize, and how grateful he is. anyways what a terrible day for rain.)

-- son of a --

is he apologizing?? or pleading?? please tell me that’s not the case, because what the actual fuck. Deku you beautiful precious radiant selfless child, this is the exact opposite of how this should be. all these motherfuckers should be on their knees apologizing to you

DEKU WHY

I DIDN’T ASK FOR THIS FREAKING BOMBARDMENT OF EMOTIONS GODDAMIT. OUT HERE ARMED WITH YOUR FREAKING TREBUCHET OF FEELS TO LAUNCH AT ME UNPROVOKED. WHAT’S WITH THAT

FREAKING CHRIST. THIS BOY IS CRYING HIS EYES OUT AND HORIKOSHI IS JUST ZOOMING IN WITH THE CAMERA, LIKE CAN WE JUST CUT HIM A BREAK ALREADY. ENOUGH OF THIS. HE’S SO YOUNG AND HE TRIES SO HARD AND I JUST NEED HIM TO FEEL SAFE, HORIKOSHI PLEASE CAN YOU JUST GIVE ME THAT ALREADY WHAT IS THE FREAKING HOLD UP!!

GIGANTIC FOX LADY!!!

GIGANTIC FOX LADY PLEASE BE MY HUGGER BY PROXY!! SERIOUSLY GIRL IF YOU JUST HOLD YOUR UMBRELLA OVER HIM OR SOMETHING AND DON’T GO THE EXTRA MILE I’M ABOUT TO LODGE AN OFFICIAL COMPLAINT. THIS IS GETTING RIDICULOUS NOW

!!!!

A KOUTA IS GOOD TOO!!! oh my god if Kouta hugs him I will seriously 100% straight up cry. go on and test me

FOR THE LOVE OF --

is this man expressly forbidden from drawing hugs in his contract or something. DO YOU DO IT JUST TO SPITE ME?? this is tyranny, sir

AND I KNOW, THIS PAGE ACTUALLY CHALLENGED THE VERY PREMISE OF THE SERIES ITSELF, AND HERE I AM COMPLAINING ABOUT HUGS, OR THE LACK THEREOF. “this is the story of how we all became the greatest heroes.” and just like that, he waves a polite middle finger at all of the Strongest Greatest Chosen One shounen protags of old, in favor of something much less conventional, much more interesting, and much more suited to Deku’s character. because if that one sentence doesn’t just sum up Deku to a T. he gladly relinquishes his Greatest Hero status in favor of acknowledging the hero in everyone. what a class act. that’s my protagonist

I love this kid so fucking much I swear. only just PLEASE. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. GIVE HIM HIS HUG

[sameteeth]

im actually kinda mad at how they made nya be the water ninja. she's strong as samurai x, and was capable of beating the ninja right up until they reveal its *gasp* a GIRL! and then ofc her element is water, and wu and misako's shit handling of the whole situation pisses me off. theyre such useless mentors imo - wu can't see past his own mysticism and very rarely deigns to help, and misako is Wu But A Woman And Slightly Weaker. (ninja-knox-ur-sox-off has a good theory/meta on why misako couldve been one of ninjagos greatest villians, check out their stuff) honestly they couldve been replaced with teapots and the plot wouldve had the same flow. anyways, ignoring ninjago's lackluster character wrangling, nya's critical moment of truth, where she needs to defeat the preeminent, just ends with her summoning a big wave and doing it in one hit. which is fine, whatever, but there's so much more they could have done with it!

in her water ninja training, nya's weakness is her perfectionism. she's very talented and picks up skills quickly, so not being able to have immediate control over her powers is frustrating. she gets angry and gives up (similar to kai) and it takes ronin of all people to show her that it's ok to fail.

nya's been surrounded by all these impossibly strong people - the ninja, born with elemental powers, lloyd who becomes incredibly powerful, wu who is their teacher, and even misako, who is smart and seasoned. they are constantly in high-stakes situations they barely make it out of alive. (sometimes they dont make it out alive.) of course she's going to struggle with the idea of perfection - she needs to be perfect and smart and seasoned and have elemental powers and battle experience so she can save not only lloyd, but the other ninja and the entirety of ninjago. that's a LOT of pressure to put on someone!!!! especially when they are newly awakened to their powers and suddenly they are the only one capable of helping.

but nya is the element of water, a powerful and versatile element. and like water, she must persist. each raindrop adds to the flood that can level towns. her final, massive wave against the preeminent is impressive, but i would have rather seen nya struggle to summon more than a few raindrops. she fails. she fails, and tries again. with ronin and kai behind her, supporting her. cheering her on. and nya tries again, makes small waves the preeminent doesn't even notice. so she gets back up and embraces the failure and tries again. one droplet can cleave mountains. nya tries and tries and tries and lets herself fail! and she forgets the pressure mounting, the scared people only she can protect, she just flows. lets the power move through her, with her, and feels her strength and understanding grow with every misstep. she isn't trying to grasp the water anymore - she *is* the water. waves of all sizes crash into the preeminent, chaos created by an elemental master who hasn't had years of experience with her element or a mother to guide her through her kata balanced on the mirror-surface of a pond.

the preeminent falls, worn and battered like a broken jetty, eroded away by the constant water. the preeminent falls because nya gave up on doing things perfectly - she just went with the flow.

[wygolvillage]

watched the craft (1996) so heres my review

short version:

this is exactly what its like when girls have sleepovers. this is like if mean girls was edgier (keep in mind ive never watched the ending of mean girls because a teacher put it on on the last day of school and we never finished the movie before we had to leave but im gonna assume it ended with everyone trying to kill each other). i really really really enjoyed it up until the ending which just totally fell flat

longer review:

a pretty decent "get power, go out of control with power, face consequences" story about a #Girlboss friend group who end up murdering people with witch powers and have a dramatic falling out with the main character after they kill her asshole crush. has some really cool lighting and shots and editing, its a visual treat, and it was good at endearing you to their friendship... before everything goes down in flames, of course. and it reminded me of that one time when i was 12 i picked up a witch book and got really disappointed that it was all stuff like "tie a red string around the name of the person you hate and say "i hate you" 5 times and bury it under your favorite tree and vague misfortune shall befall them" like, i assumed cursing people would be more interesting lol.

one thing i did think was weird was that bonnie and rochelle were counted as "assholes going mad with power" almost as much as nancy was, narratively, when the stuff they did was really tame honestly... rochelle especially. making a racist bully's hair fall out is, like, nothing LOL so i dont see the reason to portray her as "going too far, omg, be wary of consequences 😱😱😱". like yeah "do unto others what you want done unto you" but the racist bully is the one who is "doing unto others" in the first place... talk shit get hit (or cursed)... and bonnie only used the magic on herself anyway like. idk. they hate to see girlbosses winning. and like i said the ending did not work for me at all. the final battle itself was really enjoyable and i liked that it ended with sarah binding nancy's powers... and then it cuts to nancy being locked up in an asylum. like, her whole thing is that she's in search of power and wields it destructively against others, so i feel like making her "powerless" would be punishment enough honestly. the asylum ending is totally unnecessary imo!

the acting was really great though! nancy especially was really enjoyable to watch, whenever the actress did that Weird Thing With Her Teeth it was awesome. really fun performances all around. also liked the soundtrack.

overall id give it a.... 7/10? worth a watch but the ending kind of dropped the ball for me

[hjazysol]

I also just finished fairy tail. And what I have to say is its perfectly fine imo. Theres no death in the main guild of characters but to say theres no death at all was not accurate. Though Makarov escaping death 3 whole times is bullshit.

The first time in the middle of Battle of Fairy Tail was a relief. The second of not being left to die by Acnologia wasn't what I expected with Laxus coming back and being referred to as his successor but it was fine. But the 3rd time. HE WAS SPENT. HE NUKED A WHOLE ARMY AND WAS LITERALLY A DUSTY ASS CORPSE FOR THE REST OF THE FINAL ARC. BUT THEN HE JUST. Woke Up.

Old man lucky. Man I better get that lucky someday. Makarov out here cheating.

The character designs are all rad and the characters themselves that you get to spend all the time with are really likeable and fun. Juvia is god. And the artsyle is really good especially in the manga. Which is what I'm reading now for the 100 Years Quest portion since there's currently no anime adaptation though one is apparently coming.

Fanservice is not at all a factor for me for anything on whether it makes it worse or not because fanservice never bothers me from the start. If its there its there. I'm just here for the plot and action :p

If I had to pick a favourite arc then it's probably either the Grand Magic Games, the Oracion Seis or Tenrou Island.

It has Dragon's.

Dragons are cool.

It also has Erza.

And Erza is cool

I feel like in terms of development. Every regularly involved character gets the same amount. But I'd say Gray's is the best simply on how it's structured and that his conflict from so long ago keeps finding a way to just fuck him up in the present day.

Like when he gets turned into a kid and experiences his trauma's as if they were happening right then and there. I felt that. His interaction with his dad was really sad to.

He has ice.

He quite literally is cool.

His last name is fucking Fullbuster. That's a coolass name!

His stripping gag is also funny.

Back before I watched either. I would always see people either saying one of the following. Sakura from Naruto & Lucy in Fairy Tail are both useless characters.

I can see why alot of people don't at all like Sakura because it's pretty understandable. Pre Timeskip she's kinda just there for the comedy & doesn't really get as involved as much as Naruto or Sasuke.

But I dont really see the need for her to. Back then anyway. She always came of as just the support character and being more stable at handling chakra and that was enough for me. Now post timeskip she can throw hands, she beats ass while also still remaining as that supporting character.

Who with a lack of their own personal like backstory no jutsu style struggle reacts to what Naruto and Sasuke do respectively and watching that was honestly really nice. And is a definite improvement from just a typical smart girl with an emo boy crush. No shade at Sasuke by the way he's fire

Now with Lucy. I just. Don't see it at all in anyway at all. Like she literally does so much throughout the whole of the story. It's not like she's just standing around letting the others do everything. Is it because she's the most emotional member?

Is that a bad thing? Last I checked character struggle and growth is a good thing. Like she's just a kind hearted person with strong ambition, the relationship between her and her spirits alone is enough to show that. Virgo is the best she's funny. The scene where she had to bite down and say bye to Aquarius to summon the C. Spirit King just so she would be able to continue fighting back against the Demon's ALONE, PLUS to save everyone.

She even trains and gets stronger alongside the spirits to finding new ways so she can be even more useful. It's great watching basically the underdog of the Guild at the beginning grow this much and so often. I wouldn't be surprised if she became a Godess by the end honestly... ...It would essentially mean Fairy Tail has one of everything. They have 4 Dragon's. And 3 Demons (I'm counting Freed in that cause with the one demon magic move he has). She's also just really funny and charming.

If I had to go about the series in way of pacing. The first season was perfect the second was way slower and the third was in the middle. 1 & 3 are also way more colourful. 2 was kinda desaturated for no reason.

And once again Juvia is God she's so damn insane & bizarre and I love her for it.

[morwensteelsheen]

so @tinacharles and I have sort of been having this conversation about the varying levels of culpability of all the men in Éowyn’s life re: her abject fucking misery, which got me to thinking about how that discussion would play out in-universe.

I know it’s pretty popular (and not incorrectly so, imo!) to have Éomer being fairly distrustful of Faramir, but I think it's underplayed just how much ammunition Faramir has to be out-and-out fucked off with Éomer on Éowyn's behalf.

Part of that understatement is a desire, I reckon, to see all the named Rohirrim as basically innocents, manipulated beyond aid by Wormtongue, and functionally helpless until Gandalf and the Three Hunters show up, but that's a take that is, imo, too reliant upon what we get in the movie canon and not reliant enough on what's actually written in the text! The point of Théoden's downfall is that it is his pride and his hubris (and not any magic!) that is his undoing, and it is Gandalf's reminders that his responsibilities are greater than the weight of the injuries to his pride that "brings him back" so to speak. The ability to stop fucking around exists at all moments within Théoden, there is no magic, no great battles, not valiant rescues involved, it's just about him putting his big girl panties on and dealing with his own life. But because there's a tendency to see too much of the movie canon in these characters, their relative culpability in Éowyn's immiseration is largely erased, which is incredibly unfair both in terms of treating these characters with the nuance they deserve, but also in terms of treating Éowyn's misery with the seriousness it deserves!

And a key element of this is Éomer's complacency/culpability in all of this. I often quote the conversation between Gandalf, Aragorn, and Éomer after the Pelennor about Éowyn's ~fundamental unknowability~, but I think it is, uhhh, pretty fucked up that Aragorn, Faramir, and Gandalf are all able to spot out Éowyn's deeply destroyed mental health within minutes of coming into contact with her (and yes, it is true enough that they're all powered-up slightly by magic-ish things) while Éomer, who has spent literally his entire life around her, doesn't really have an inkling of what's actually going on in her interior life. That's really upsetting to me, and is no doubt deeply upsetting and isolating for Éowyn, who has basically no other people in her life until Faramir shows up (you know, after she literally tries to kill herself!).

More than that, when Gandalf and the Three Hunters show up and immediately break Théoden free of his pity party, we don't get a sense that undermining Wormtongue has any actual political repercussions—Hama (👑) immediately names Éowyn as the favoured heir to the throne, which says that she's got a substantial amount of organic support where and when it matters. Yes, it's true they immediately have to go fight Saruman's forces in Helm's Deep, but Helm's Deep is a pretty unique battle in the books for how "small" it is in terms of coalitions: the Rohirrim fight that sucker almost entirely unaided! So if a consequence of unseating Wormtongue had been facing down Saruman's lot on the battlefield (assuming that he would have been prepared to do so at any point before the canonical Battle of the Hornburg), we know that the Rohirrim could have handled it, and what's more, they might have been in an even better position to have handled it, because Théodred would have likely still been alive, alongside however many men they lost at the Battle of the Fords of Isen. A lot of words to say: there's really no indication that there was a danger, per se, to beating Wormtongue's ass down; but we do know that there was some obstacle. Tolkien goes pretty far out of his way to hint that it's a lack of will that's doing most of the work there. As readers, I think we're all mostly content to ignore this element of Éomer's complacency because we do largely see Éomer at his best and most noble, but I think we do a real disservice to both his and Éowyn's characters for not dealing with that more intimately.

Anyways, my original point is that I think Faramir has really good reason to be quite grumpy with Éomer and I think he'd actually probably be supported in that frustration by Éowyn, who would almost certainly be pretty chuffed to finally have someone fighting her corner after so many years. I don't know exactly how Faramir's frustration would manifest—almost certainly not with the level of vitriol and overtness that his frustration with his father manifested itself, but I do think he would be very good at making sure that Éomer is keenly aware that Faramir is Unhappy about his actions/lack thereof. That, I think, adds a really interesting dynamic not just to Éowyn and Faramir's personal life, particularly as they're off starting their lives together, but also their political life, given that Éomer is the new King of the Riddermark, shown to be exceptionally close with both Aragorn and Imrahil, and, of course, is later married to Faramir's cousin—some of Faramir's last living family.

Edit: just picked up the books to double check some stuff so adding cites beneath the cut

On Théoden's 'malady':

"the influence over him that Gríma gained when the King's health began to fail. This occurred early in the year 3014, when Théoden was sixty-six; his malady may thus have been due to natural causes, though the Rohirrim commonly lived till near or beyond their eightieth year. But it may well have been induced or increased by subtle poisons, administered by Gríma. In any case Théoden's sense of weakness and dependence on Gríma was largely due to the cunning and skills of this evil counsellor's suggestions."

From Unfinished Tales, V. The Battles of the Fords of Isen.

On Éomer Missing The Fucking Point:

"But Aragorn came to Éowyn, and he said: ‘Here there is a grievous hurt and a heavy blow. The arm that was broken has been tended with due skill, and it will mend in time, if she has the strength to live: It is the shield-arm that is maimed; but the chief evil comes through the sword-arm. In that there now seems no life, although it is unbroken.

‘Alas! For she was pitted against a foe beyond the strength of her mind or body. And those who will take a weapon to such an enemy must be sterner than steel, if the very shock shall not destroy them. It was an evil doom that set her in his path. For she is a fair maiden, fairest lady of a house of queens. And yet I know not how I should speak of her. When I first looked on her and perceived her unhappiness, it seemed to me that I saw a white flower standing straight and proud, shapely as a lily, and yet knew that it was hard, as if wrought by elf-wrights out of steel. Or was it, maybe, a frost that had turned its sap to ice, and so it stood, bitter-sweet, still fair to see, but stricken, soon to fall and die? Her malady begins far back before this day, does it not, Éomer?’

‘I marvel that you should ask me, lord,’ he answered. ‘For I hold you blameless in this matter, as in all else; yet I knew not that Éowyn, my sister, was touched by any frost, until she first looked on you. Care and dread she had, and shared with me, in the days of Wormtongue and the king’s bewitchment; and she tended the king in growing fear. But that did not bring her to this pass!’

‘My friend,’ said Gandalf, ‘you had horses, and deeds of arms, and the free fields; but she, born in the body of a maid, had a spirit and courage at least the match of yours. Yet she was doomed to wait upon an old man, whom she loved as a father, and watch him falling into a mean dishonoured dotage; and her part seemed to her more ignoble than that of the staff he leaned on.

‘Think you that Wormtongue had poison only for Théoden’s ears? Dotard! What is the house of Eorl but a thatched barn where brigands drink in the reek, and their brats roll on the floor among their dogs? Have you not heard those words before? Saruman spoke them, the teacher of Wormtongue. Though I do not doubt that Wormtongue at home wrapped their meaning in terms more cunning. My lord, if your sister’s love for you, and her will still bent to her duty, had not restrained her lips; you might have heard even such things as these escape them. But who knows what she spoke to the darkness, alone, in the bitter watches of the night, when all her life seemed shrinking, and the walls of her bower closing in about her, a hutch to trammel some wild thing in?’

Then Éomer was silent, and looked on his sister, as if pondering anew all the days of their past life together."

From Return of the King, VIII The House of Healing

[terresdebrume]

I haven't written consistently since 2020. I haven't written nothing but a lot of what I did write was harder to write than it should have. I participated in two Reverse Bangs to try and get back to it, but they ended up feeling like obligations as much as (if not more than) fun thing to do.

I think probably a lot of it is due to the general circumstances of the world and of my life? I mean, if I try to make a headcount:

COVID finally caught up with Cambodia in 2020, inducing lockdown with high levels of incertitude (which I don't deal with very well) and stress.

I lost my cat Pouet right at the end of the year. She was only 9 months old and I did Not Take It Well.

I spent most of 2021 stuck in a workplace where the general conditions got progressively worse, in large parts because the manager actively and explicitly worked to destroy any kind of solidarity and camaradry there was in the team (and we were a good fucking team, damnit) and also in my specific case because I kept having to argue for my right to do the job I was hired for. In the end, what prompted me to leave was a combo of a) wanting to cry at the thought of going back to work b) getting so sick I got a week of sick leave like. A week after getting back.

This led to about two months of unemployment which, though needed, was also stressful because I had no idea if/when I'd find another job. I didn't have the energy to work but also staying at home and doing nothing was bad for me, so that went bad.

In February of 2022 I started working as an independent teacher with two different structures, both of which changed my hours, class lists and work conditions several times without warning or consultation, which again doesn't work for me. I need to have a certain predictability in my life and I need improvisation or last minute changes to be brought by me not other people's decision that don't take me/my time into account.

In June, one of those two jobs finished, leaving me without my main source of income for six weeks but also (at the time) signifying that I was going to go back to France in December of 2022, meaning I had to start on a lot of prep things to move my cats overseas, look into buying plane tickets in a comparatively short time, and also meant I would have to go back a) in winter (I hate the cold) and b) to my mother's place, for an indeterminate amount of time.

Now said place has offered me a full time contract for the upcoming year, which is kind of scary in its own right (40h a week is A Lot imo) but also means I have more time to prepare for leaving in 2023, which includes preparing for the cats to travel, learning two new languages to maximize my chances to land a job in warmer European countries and, eventually job hunting.

It also means my mother is coming here in December and staying in my flat for however long, which is going to be stressful in its own right but also she's evoked the possibility of coming with my sister, which I Do Not Want. (Like. I'm already not big on my mother staying with me but she's missed/ignored/countered every hint I've given her to take a hotel so far and I'm like... trying to pick my battles I guess?)

The risk of ending up with my cats at my mother's house for an undetermined amount of time is still Very Real and I'm Stressed out whenever I think about it.



... Well shit, I was just trying to explain why I needed to take as easy an approach to writing fic as possible and now I'm like 'Oh. Oh, I'm not doing good actually!' so like.

Fun post, I guess.

[ageofgeek]

Thoughts about Endgame’s time travel and what it could mean for Loki

So I know a million and a half YouTubers and fans have already tread this ground before me, but I haven’t really read too many theories/explanations about time travel in the MCU (according to Endgame), and having just rewatched it, I wanted to jot down a few of my own thoughts about it.  Strap in, guys - this is gonna be a long one.

The main time travel rule that Endgame seems to establish is this:

You cannot change your own past.  Changing your past will not change your own present or future.

Okay, so this is a fair rule for time travel. If you travel to the past and change something, it will (presumably***) create an alternate timeline, but it will NOT change your own timeline.

However, things get...complicated from there.

1. The Ancient One’s explanation of time travel intersects with the infinity stones (i.e. the infinity stones are special)

When the Ancient One is explaining her view of time travel to Bruce, she says:

The Infinity Stones create what you experience as the flow of time.  Remove one of the stones, and that flow splits. 

Now, this may benefit your reality, but my new one, not so much.  In this new branch reality, without our chief weapon against the forces of darkness, our world would be overrun.

She illustrates it with a very interesting visual:

Now, to be fair, this sort of timeline is pretty common for visualizing time travel (that scene in Back to the Future 2 comes to mind), BUT I just think it’s interesting that it looks very similar to a visual we’ve seen in the Loki trailers at the TVA:

This is the first mention that Endgame makes of alternate/branching realities, which is intriguing.  Because I just assumed that even though you couldn’t change the past in the MCU’s version of time travel, any change to the past would create an alternate reality.

This explanation, however, seems to imply that you can only create an alternate timeline by messing with the infinity stones in that timeline.

Bruce’s response supports that theory:

We can erase [the alternate timeline].  Because once we’re done with the stones, we can return each one to its own timeline, at the moment it was taken.  So, chronologically, in that reality, it never left.

Again, Bruce only talks about their removal of the infinity stones here - not any other changes they make to the timeline (which they’ve clearly already made).

So, my interpretation of this is twofold:

Messing with infinity stones in the past creates an alternate/branching timeline, because it disrupts the flow of time created by the infinity stones.

Messing with anything in the past that is not an infinity stone does not create an alternate timeline.  Either 1) it doesn’t change anything at all (i.e. when the time travel “ends,” the past gets “reset” to how it always was); 2) the changes somehow “merge” with the main timeline; or 3) the “changes” were actually a closed loop - it had always been this way, and we (the audience) just didn’t know it.

2. 2012!Loki escaping with the Tesseract

Now we get to our favorite God of Mischief, Loki, and his escape with the Space Stone in 2012.

By escaping with the Tesseract in 2012 (when he obviously did not do that in the OG Timeline), Loki specifically displaced an infinity stone from its proper place in the timeline.

Now, let’s look at how Mobius, in the second Loki trailer, seems to frame Loki’s actions (remember that this is a trailer clip and the lines could’ve been edited):

[The TVA] protects the proper flow of time.  You picked up the Tesseract, breaking reality.  I want you to help us fix it.

This seems to support the theory that Loki displacing the Tesseract created alternate realities and disrupted the “proper flow of time” (i.e. the OG Timeline).  The phrase “breaking reality” is very interesting as well, implying that Loki’s actions didn’t just create alternate timelines, but specifically created bad ones.

3. 2014!Thanos, Nebula, and Gamora being displaced in 2023

So, now we come to the next big timeline screw-up: the fact that Thanos’ army from 2014 - including Thanos himself, Nebula, Gamora, and the Black Order - are all displaced from 2014 to 2023.

Everyone from 2014 except Gamora dies in the final battle.  Now, it seems crazy that this wouldn’t create an alternate timeline.  If there’s no more Thanos in 2014, then there wouldn’t be a Thanos to collect all of the infinity stones and Snap in 2018, right?

But if we’re going by the Ancient One’s rules, then it shouldn’t create an alternate timeline because it didn’t involve an infinity stone in 2014.  Instead, there are 3 possibilities:

The time travel didn’t change the past at all.  The way this would play out is that Thanos and Co. would leave 2014 and rejoin the timeline in 2023.  But the moment that the time travel “ended” (i.e. the moment that Thanos’ army was through the Quantum Realm), the past timeline reset back to what it had been originally.  So even though past versions of Thanos and Co. fought the Avengers in 2023, if someone (for example, Steve Rogers) were to return to 2014, they would still find Thanos and Co. in 2014, alive and kicking.  I think that this is the most likely scenario.

The changes made through time travel merge with the main timeline.  Now, I can see this happening with minor changes (for example, Steve and Tony stealing Pym particles from the 1970s), but huge ones like Thanos and Co. just not being alive?  I don’t know how that would “merge” with the main timeline.  So, IMO, this is probably not a likely possibility.

The “changes” were actually a closed loop - the past was always this way.  This clearly doesn’t work for 2014 Thanos and Co., unless there is some power like the TVA intervening to fix changes to the timeline which aren’t caused by infinity stones, in order to prevent alternate timelines from being created.  Under this scenario, Thanos and Co. were always meant to time travel from 2014 to 2023, and they did do that in the OG Timeline.  But unbeknownst to us (the audience), the TVA stepped in and “replaced” the missing Thanos and Co. members in 2014 with alternate versions of them, preserving the timeline.  In my opinion, if we’re going by the rule that changes to the past not related to infinity stones don’t create alternate timelines, then this possibility also doesn’t make much sense (in most scenarios - stay tuned).

4. Steve returning the stones

At the end of Endgame, Steve travels in time to (presumably) fulfill Bruce’s promise to the Ancient One - to return each infinity stone to the moment it was taken, thus erasing any alternate timeline that may have been created.

BRUCE: Remember, you have to return the stones to the exact moment you got them, or you’re gonna open up a bunch of nasty alternative realities.

STEVE: Don’t worry, Bruce.  Clip all the branches.

However, there is one wrinkle to this: the Tesseract that they lost to Loki in 2012.  This is the singular infinity stone-related screw-up that Steve isn’t able to fix.  The one branch he isn’t able to clip.  Presumably, this is why the TVA arrest and detain Loki and not the Avengers - because Steve’s replacement of the stones worked, and erased all of the other alternate timelines except for one.

Again, this is why I think the infinity stone distinction re: time travel makes the most sense.  Because why else would the TVA only be focused on Loki’s disruption of the timeline when, to the outside observer, the Avengers messed up the timeline a lot more?  Well, the answer is that distinction: all of the ways that the Avengers interfered with the past which weren’t infinity stone-related didn’t create alternate realities, and the Avengers then corrected/erased any alternate realities they did create by returning the stones to the moment they were taken.  Except the Tesseract in 2012.

5. What is up with Old!Steve?

Here is where things get annoying and contradictory.  Now, I can’t remember exactly what explanations for Old!Steve that the Russos and M&M gave, but I know that they conflict with each other (which is...insane, but that’s a whole other rant).

So let’s walk through it.  Before Steve enters the Quantum Realm, Sam asks Bruce how long this is going to take.  Bruce answers:

For him, as long as he needs.  For us, five seconds.

Bruce then says to Steve:

We’ll meet you back here, alright?

Obviously, Steve doesn’t appear after 5 seconds.  But Old!Steve shows up on a bench slightly off-screen by the lake, having lived a full life with Peggy (blegh, I know, it sucks, but I’m just going with it for now).

Since Steve presumably clipped all of the infinity stone branches (except the 2012 Tesseract one), we’re presumably in the realm of no alternate realities.  By living a life with Peggy, he didn’t interfere with or displace an infinity stone (to our knowledge***), so he shouldn’t have created an alternate reality.  Which means that there are, once again, 3 possibilities:

1. The time travel didn’t change the past at all.  This would play out similarly to the 2014 Thanos scenario.  Steve would time travel to the 1950s, marry Peggy, have a life with her in the main timeline (presumably making a ton of changes along the way), and then when his time travel “ended,” the past timeline reset back to what it had been originally (Peggy marrying someone else, etc.).  Now, I still think this scenario is the most likely, based on all of the other things we’ve gone through.  But this is complicated by the fact that Old!Steve doesn’t reappear on the time travel platform, which seems to suggest that he didn’t use the Quantum Realm to time travel to that bench, but instead simply lived until 2023 in the main timeline and knew what day and time to show up at the lake.  So, if that’s the case, then when did Steve’s time travel “end,” and when did the timeline reset?  I would argue that it “ended” the moment that Old!Steve’s life caught up with and surpassed his younger self’s departure in 2023.  So Old!Steve was hobbling along next to the lake, with his past with Peggy still “changed,” up until the moment that young!Steve entered the Quantum Realm.  The moment that happened, Old!Steve ceased to be living in a changed past - he was now living in his own future (the furthest in the timeline he had ever been).  When that happened, the main timeline’s past reset, and Old!Steve’s life with Peggy was erased.

(This one is so complicated, I had to draw a diagram. RIP).

2. The changes made through time travel merge with the main timeline.  Similarly to the Thanos scenario, I just can’t see this happening because it’s such a major change to the timeline.  How do you merge 2 timelines where Peggy is married to 2 different people?  Still not very likely.

3. The “changes” were actually a closed loop - the past was always this way.  Now, oddly enough, THIS is the scenario that probably makes the most sense for Old!Steve, despite the fact that it definitely doesn’t work for any other non-infinity stone time travel shenanigans.  In this scenario, Steve was always Peggy’s husband in the main timeline (we never did learn who he was), and the past was just a closed loop for him.  He never left the main timeline, which is why he showed up on the bench in Endgame and not on the time travel platform.  However, this also has its weaknesses.  For one, as I mentioned in the 2014 Thanos scenario, in order for this to work and be consistent with other changes, the TVA (or some other higher power) would have to get involved.  And two, this only works if you believe one of 3 scenarios:

Young!Steve, after getting out of the ice, never looked up who Peggy’s husband was, which seems unlikely.

Peggy somehow disguised/hid her husband’s (Old!Steve’s) identity all of these years, so young!Steve never found out (also unlikely, considering how high-profile Peggy was as director of SHIELD).

Young!Steve always knew that he somehow married Peggy, which would be super weird because that would mean that Steve would’ve known about the existence of time travel as early as 2011.

So we’re back to the “closed loop” possibility not making sense (although it is still a possibility).

Personally, I still think that #1 makes the most sense for non-infinity stone related time travel - the timeline doesn’t really change, it just “resets” after the time travel is over.

6. In Conclusion

This is my theory for the rules of time travel in the MCU, as we know them in Endgame (and supported by the Loki trailers):

1. Messing with the infinity stones in the past creates alternate timelines.

2. Messing with anything else in the past does not create alternate timelines.

3. Changes in the past which are not related to infinity stones are temporary, and the main timeline is “reset” to what it was originally after the time travel meddling is “over.”

Again, it is highly likely that this will turn out to be completely incorrect when Loki airs!  But I’m just hoping that we’ll get some sort of explanation, because Endgame is a convoluted mess and we need some rules.

[dropoutparty]

ngc ramblings part 3- chapter 5

here we are at part 3!!! sorry this one took so long, i originally was gonna make this post include entropy and extus (along with finally talking about face in depth) but it was so fuckin long that im splitting it into 2 different posts! the next part isnt done yet but im like almost halfway done so it shouldnt be too much longer until its out! also before we get into this one:

tw for: death, animal death, and suicide. pls take care of urself and don't read this if those things are triggering for u <3

ok lets get on with the post

at the start of entropy zach doesnt waste any time getting right to the point. this place is bigger than the other planets so far, and zach says the music this time around is a melody that “started out normal but then got distorted” played by a violin sounding instrument. even tho i do sometimes forget that this is supposed to be a creepypasta im not surprised that he said it made him feel depressed and unnerved lmao. anyways, this planet has all new level types in it!! no reused ones!! ok now this is epic. the bosses this time around are megalon, battra, and mechagodzilla, but itll be a good while before we get to those guys because this chapter is long as hell holy shit?? buckle up babez <33 now, before i get into the meat of things as usual im gonna talk abt the planet name! entropy basically means “a lack of order/predictability or a gradual decline into disorder” and that's very accurate to this part of the story. at this point, red is pissed off and is getting desperate, which means from here on out things are going to be getting more intense and more unstable. this world is the turning point in the overall story, basically.

now with that out of the way, zach first goes to the worlds quiz level as usual! this time something was different. usually, in the quiz levels there would be goofy ass music playin in the bg (specifically the GH1D0RA cheat music, if you wanna like listen to it ig?) but from here on out its been replaced by the music from the games password screen, which zach called creepy earlier on in the pasta. im gonna glaze over the quiz again this time, but when we get to the next planet ill talk about all of the quizzes in depth all at once. basically all you need to know for now abt what happens here is face asks “do you like mothra?” and when zach picks no (after going on a tangent abt how mothra sucks lmao,, bro i swear im good at the game my controllers just messed up /s), face enters bastard mode and goes “TOO BAD!” and boom now zach cant play as anyone but mothra. zach is pissed for now but little does he know this is just going to become an even more epic gamer bc of this,, youll never get better at something if you never try and all that.

after that, zach moves on to the first level type- the forest. immediately zach gets an eerie feeling from this level bc he has some kinda fear involving forests at night (i can think of a reason why but ill have to talk abt that later just to be sure). hes also not feelin great about being forced to play as mothra, so the pressure of it all is def starting to get to him by now. the music in the forest is woodwinds followed by slow, rhythmic drums and chiming bells. must have been some ominous woodwinds and bells bc it made him feel like he was intruding somewhere he shouldnt be (oh rlly?? u dont say,, everything up until now has been fine /s). getting into the level itself, eventually zach comes across some weird deer-like monsters just vibing and scares them away when he gets close. later in the level he finds more of these weird deer along with a sloth-like creature on some of the trees and some raptor dudes killing some of the deer. zach shoots one of the raptors but thats about it. nothing really happened in this level but zach noted that he didnt feel like he was playing a video game, but instead it felt more like he was exploring a forest in another dimension. thats interesting for reasons ill ~get to later~ (yall must be so tired of hearing that by now omg,, i know im tired of saying it at least. i was gonna wait until after replay to talk about things but i severely underestimated how long this whole project would be, so i might make a post for the “more on that later” stuff before i get into replay. let me know what u think i should do).

anyways, the next thing zach checks out is the first tv screen level so far. these levels just play an animation with some music in the background, and theres a different animation per level. this time around the animation is of a kid with a beaver(?) head licking a lollipop and the music is the GH1D0RA music that the quiz levels used to use. the only thing of note here is that zach says he had a shirt that looked just like that when he was a kid. after that, were off to some of the weirdest fuckin levels in this whole thing imo- the hourglass levels. these levels have an entirely brown color palette, with grandfather clocks standing in the background (the level appears to be in like a hallway or something) and various time measuring things floating in the air. the music is the same as the board (ig cosby just didnt feel like thinking of what theme this place would have lol). after a little bit zach was rlly happy to see actual enemies from the normal game show up! these are basically like aircraft, tanks, etc. thats not the main attraction here tho, bc this level has its own unique mechanic! this mechanic is the colored hourglass items you can pick up. there are three of them, a blue one that slows time down and makes enemies from the past appear, a red one that speeds up time and makes enemies from the future appear, and a green one that made the time flow normally and spawned enemies from the normal game. zach found the blue one first, which caused a bunch of prehistoric enemies based on real animals to show up. after that he found a green one and fought normal enemies again, and then he found a red hourglass. the future enemies here look like aliens to me, and zach says that one enemy reminds him of something he saw in a book once. eventually, a special future creature showed up and zach was suddenly in a boss battle! or a mini boss battle? that description is probably more accurate. this guy doesnt have a face, and he can only attack by shooting a beam from his face, it sure does look cool! after zach beat it tho, he was off to the next level type, which is basically a toxic waste dump.

zach called it grungy and inhospitable, with the music being a synth ambient loop that made him feel dizzy while he listened to it. this is important because this is the first instance of the game making zach feel something *physically*, not just psychologically. all of the enemies here are mutated to some degree, with him first seeing green mummies with bird skulls coming out from vats of toxic slutch and a brownish cow skeleton monster with spider legs. later zach comes across a deer from the woods, drinking some toxic slutch (delinchous). zach got close to it to try making it stopped but suddenly some enemies came out of nowhere and scared it into running right off a ledge and into the slutch. rip :pensive:. after that zach found more mutated enemies (i.e some things with tentacles and some other deformed thing with human teeth) before he finally gets to the end of the level, where theres another miniboss waiting for him!! this ones a toxic sludge monster with a whale skull who attacks with a mouth projectile and by charging into you. the monster sank into the slutch and thats all for this level babeyy!

the next level is another forest, but this time its winter! its still at night, but this time zach doesnt feel off put, which he mostly attributes to the music. he describes it as a gentle, calm song that almost sounded romantic. the entire first segment of this level had no enemies in it, but dw this level is interesting i swear. the next segment starts out just as empty as the last one, but this time its silent. that is, until the music from “unforgiving cold” starts playing. yaa you remember that place!! i think i said it was less interesting than i remembered but its interesting again now bc it was foreshadowing these levels!! anyways soon after the music started up, zach started to come across tons of frozen bodies of the deer from earlier. some were mutilated, some werent, but they were all frozen and covered in snow. eventually zach does come across something living though, a sloth creature from earlier! its just vibing when suddenly the winter versions of the raptors from earlier rush in and fuckin obliterate the sloth thing. those things just blindly try killing everything in sight, and even start fighting themselves before zach finally gets to the last part of the level.

now this is where shit starts to get crayzay. this part opens up to a big empty field with a full moon and the nice music from earlier back. despite the nice music tho, zach immediately starts feeling dread and eventually he finds a lake. the lake comes down from the sky and starts to crack like an egg, a humanoid figure curled up in the fetus position dropping into the lake below and the moon halves disintegrated. this spawned the moon beast, the hardest challenge zachs had to deal with so far. after he finally defeats it, the screen goes to black and the name “melissa” is on screen, written in red. after that, the screen then says kys. the word kill then fills up the screen, layering over itself until it forms a picture of reds face. its now that we finally get to hear abt the whole melissa thing (which makes it sound like shes been mentioned in the pasta before this but thats not what i mean lmao). to summarize, zach had a middle school gf named melissa (also bro middle school?? wadda hell) who often went into “episodes” where she would stare off, expressionless, before trembling and putting her face in her hands. she and zach hung out in a field at night a lot but one night she just stared at the moon the whole time before running into traffic and dying.

NOW its finally later!!! were not done with entropy yet, but this is the end of part one of entropy so i wanna just take a little break to talk about things so far. this planet is FULL of symbolism and foreshadowing. to start off, i think a lot of the questions face asks at the beginning foreshadow things that happen. some examples are “is time slipping though your fingers?” which could allude to the time levels, “do you have any regrets?” which i think obviously foreshadows the whole melissa thing, “is it safe to go out at night?” and “do you find it hard to sleep at night?” both follow the same kinda theme, which i think relates to how the melissa incident happened at night, specifically out at night. i dont think the forest levels have anything too important in them, other than to introduce the presence of an innocent, harmless creature that doesnt deserve what happens to it later (aka the deer things) which might symbolize melissa. more evidence for this symbolizing melissa comes from the encounter with the deer in the toxic dump and the winter forest, where in the former zach tries to stop it from hurting itself but is too late, being forced to watch it die, and in the latter the same innocent thing from earlier is found dead close to where the real incident took place. the two big themes to keep in mind here are death and time, more specifically the past. most of the enemies here are either made from bones or kill other enemies, there's a dedicated time level referencing things that zach remembers seeing at one point (aka that one alien zach recognized), the beaver head had the same shirt as child zach did, it all connects to zachs past and the death of melissa. as for the moon beast, its the most obvious reference for reasons ive already explained. i dont really know what the moon cracking open and dropping a curled up human into the lake could mean other than some other thing melissa related, but i *do* think that the fact that the moon beast is the most difficult thing zach has faced so far is symbolic of the fact that the trauma from this event has followed him throughout his entire life, and its something he struggles with daily. it could even be the reason why he said no when face asked if he could sleep easily at night. the moon beast also has some black fur around its neck, which i think is meant to represent a tire track, referencing and/or mocking the way melissa died.

its so cool how this entire part of the story builds up to and foreshadows the bomb it drops at the end of the part, giving people something to look back on. a lot of ppl say that as soon as the melissa stuff gets introduced the story goes down in quality, and i do somewhat agree with that sentiment, especially if they want the story to actually be scary, but i think the direction the story goes from this point on is so unique and cool. it does follow the whole “theres a ghost in the game” troupe (even tho it was probably seen as a spin on that originally) but it doesnt do the same cliches as so many other gaming creepypastas do and it really takes the concept and makes it its own. i just think its neat,,,

anyways im done gushing abt this story, lets get on with part 2 of extus!! basically zach has a fuckin panic attack and, after taking a few minutes to calm himself down when its over, he decides that he has to finish the game now because if he doesnt its just going to haunt him for the rest of his life. zach has now realized that the game is “alive” and can somehow see his thoughts and memories, so understandably hes pretty freaked out by it at this point. when he keeps playing, the first thing he does is check out another tv screen level. this time, the animation is of a fish dude just kinda standing there with his mouth flapping open and closed and the music is the neptune board music from the original game. the only reason i can think of for why this is here is maybe the game is mocking zach for the panic attack he just had (bc when u have a panic attack you feel like you can barely breathe, if ur lucky enough to have never had one before and u dont know) but thats abt it. its probably just a random goofy thing cosby threw in there.

anyways, the next actual level is the first labyrinth level. this time around, its a gold labyrinth specifically. the music in these levels is a slow, ominous drum beat with female vocals occasionally coming in and (basically from here on out) the monster zach plays as is now half the size it used to be. i think this shows how zachs feeling at this point, like this whole thing isnt just being a big strong monster and beating up enemies any more, he feels small and scared and helpless in the face of something potentially dangerous that he doesnt understand maybe his confusion about the game is the reason *why* theres so many labyrinth levels here in the first place. anyways im getting ahead of myself. personally, i think the aesthetic of the gold labyrinth is very similar to the green temples back on trance. while trance had a more circular and soft theme to it's architecture and sculpture, entropys is much more square or rectangle oriented. despite this, i think that the golden mazes at least are another religious kind of building, and the architecture is just different because theyre two different cultures who just happen to worship the same spiritual figure (aka melissa. did i say that earlier? i think i did,, if i didnt well the religions worship melissa, not knowing she's a dead human or anything. probably).

moving on, zach notes how the gold labyrinth would probably have been impossible to navigate as any of the other monsters, so turns out face being an asshole was a blessing in disguise after all huh? anyways this place is full of weird gold monsters, lava/fire traps, and stone faces (both in more of an easter island head style and in the regular feminine headshot weve seen so far). zach comes across two feminine heads, one that is more adult looking and pure gold, and another one that looks much younger and whos eyes have red irises and blue scleras. this statue apparently looks a lot like melissa did on the night she died, so zach leaves it pretty quickly. i *think* this is the first time we see the color blue associated with melissa? if it isnt sorry abt that, its been a couple days since i worked on ngcr so ive forgotten some of the smaller or more subtle things by now. GOD i keep getting side tracked ANYWAYS eventually zach finds a non-gold enemy and sees it get picked up by like an arcade crane claw. hes curious so he follows the claw, only to see the monster be put in a big gold cauldron and walk out the side of it as a gold monster.

gonna be honest, no idea what the hell this could mean. like? theres been no themes of corruption or good things becoming evil so far so this just kinda. exists,, yea idk lol. im not part of like any discord servers or anything so all this theorizing and analysis has just been me, maybe getting some small ideas from like random youtube comments or something, so if something ive said so far has been unanimously disagreed with somewhere i dont know about it. thats also why this isnt really a definitive or comprehensive analysis (even tho im trying to be as comprehensive as i can).

anyways zach finds the exit soon after and hes on to the next level type (there's so fucking many of them ik dont worry weve almost gotten to all of them now), the indigo cliffs. the background of these levels is similar to the blue mountains from trance, but now the moon and clouds from the toxic dump background is also here (and colored indigo to match). the music here is just a deep rumbling noise. the first “enemies” he sees here are just a bunch of multicolored little guys coming out of a hole in the ground and jumping off a cliff. were continuing the death theme yall!! anyways zach continues, flying over some more weird creatures (tho some of them just look like dinosaurs lol) before he sees a bunch more of the multicolored guys out and about but this time theyre getting grabbed by birds!! wadda heel!!! zach comments on how the multicolored dudes seem eager to die and thinks maybe the moon has something to do with it (like melissa dude wat!!!! that's crazy /s). at the end of the level there were some more multicolored dudes just walking into a creatures mouth so zach attacked the thing and killed it and the levels over yay!

now its time for the bosses babeyy!!! first zach fights battra (basically an evil moth kaiju), the music is varans theme. battra starts off in his larvae form, where he basically just fought by running into you and shooting stuff at you. while fighting this form, zach noticed that the game buffed mothra because his gamer skillz were too cringe lmaoo. he beats the larvae form and battra goes into his second form, where hes basically a stronger clone of mothra (misogyny). zach fights battra and has fun doing it (for once,, good for him) and he wins yay! next hes fighting megalon (a big beetle/bug kaiju), whos music was gigans theme. im tired when im writing this so ill just give you zachs description of how he fought: “strong, persistent, but dumb”. after this, zach checks out the last tv screen of entropy. this time, it shows a big buff guy with a sack over his head hit a womans head with a sledgehammer while shes tied to a table or something. the music for it was the password theme. i think this is probably here because red is getting angrier? like this guy is still here after i triggered his ptsd?? what the hell!!!

anyways before we get to the last boss we have one last level type to get through- the shadow labyrinth. at this point, zach starts to feel drained because no shit sherlock you just had a panic attack and youve been playing this game for fuckin several hours at this point of course youre fuckin drained. anyways zach enters the shadow labyrinth, which is a black recolor of the gold labyrinth. the music is “evil ambience” similar to unforgiving colds music but distinctly different apparently. there werent any enemies so zach just kinda wandered for a while until the lights turned off, darkening the whole screen and (secretly) spawning tons of spooky enemies thatll chase and hit mothra in the dark. eventually the lights came back on and zach started scrambling to the exit. when the lights turned back off, zach was able to find one of the melissa looking statues and stood next to it. it warded off the monsters while the lights were off, so zach was safe. i think this shows 2 things: 1) its a little more validation for my “religion in this world worships melissa” theory and 2) it foreshadows the way melissa wants to protect zach at the end of the game. zach beat the shadow labyrinth a lot faster than the gold one so were done with all the stages now!! now theres only the last boss and red and were done with entropy!

the last boss is mechagodzilla, but when zach starts the level, normal godzilla is there instead!! its whatever tho bc soon the disguise is gone and its just pretty much the normal mechagodzilla fight (but now hes got a gay beam). at about half health tho, mechagodzillas sprite breaks into pieces like gezoras did way back on earth and reforms into not-mechagodzilla. even tho it looks uncanny (and the usage of the face statue on the front is probably there to further mock zach bc melissa) zach beats it p easily and now its time for the chase. ba dum ba dum thats the sound of a chase.

as usual tho, before i get to the red chase its time to talk about entropy as a planet!! i think the best way to describe the layout is “a big forest with a toxic waste dump in it takes up half the planet while the other half is a large religious temple/labyrinth with a dangerous underbelly”. there doesnt seem to be any intelligent life there now (its all dead by now probably) but there was at some point at least because imean the huge labyrinth is there dude!!! i dont have much to say for this section tbh bc i feel like i've already said everything i wanted to, so its time for the chase ig!!

basically the chase with red here takes place in a labyrinth level bc of course it does. this labyrinth, however, seems to be made of some kind of organic matter. is it flesh? organs? nondescript viscera? idk but it's pulsating and bloody. also this time red has wings too!! anyways, basically zach avoids red throughout the maze, red breaks through one of the walls with his big alien tongue, and zach gets to the end of the maze. nothing crazy happens at the end of this chapter (i think it was crazy enough as is) so thats the end of that and now its time for the penultimate planet- extus.

[sexycraisinthanos]

I’m gonna infodump about my favorite movie

Rise of the Guardians

It’ll be under the readmore, but TL;DR: Watch Rise of the Guardians and read the books

Rise of the Guardians is a 2012 animated film released by Dreamworks. The story is childhood figures (Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, Sandman, and Jack Frost) trying to defend the children of earth against Pitch Black, (The Boogeyman) 

It’s based on a book series called Guardians of Childhood, written by William Joyce. Who, if you don’t know, writes children’s book. Guardians of Childhood is more of a “Young Adult” series compared to his other Guardians books (The Man in the Moon, Sandman: The Story of Sanderson Mansnoozie, and Jack Frost are all part of the series, but they are picture books.)

He’s also written other books you may be familiar with.

The Leaf Men and the Brave Good Bugs and A Day with Wilbur Robinson 

Sound familiar?

Maybe you’d recognize them as their movie counterparts, Epic (animated by Blue Sky Studios) and Meet the Robinsons (animated of course by Disney)

Also Rolie Polie Olie, which was a favorite Disney Jr cartoon growing up for me, and was also a book series. 

I could honestly go on and on about William Joyce, his work was a part of my childhood a LOT (even credited for working on some of my favorite films like Buddy, Robots, Toy Story, and A Bug’s Life) and that’s probably why I love ROTG so much.

I read all of the Guardians books and own all of them save for Jack Frost and The Art of Rise of the Guardians and the books are not cheap, but what books are? I have HARD COVER BITCHES. Half of them were gifts and I also own the ROTG DVD.

The art in the books (all drawn by William Joyce himself) is really good (this is my favorite art from the books)

And the animation in the movie, as expected from Dreamworks, is beautiful. 

You get to see all their unique homes and they’re such varying types of environments. Of course, you have the North Pole, where it’s chaotic and wonderful. Just look at this concept art 

And then you have the Tooth Palace, where the Tooth Fairy does her work

It’s very obvious that there are some Indian inspirations in the design because Tooth herself is actually Middle-Eastern (in the books it’s explained in depth more and one of my complaints about the movie is that they whitewashed her even though her concept art in the ending credits shows her with brown skin)

The Warren, where the Easter Bunny paints his eggs

Which is something you never really think about because people only focus on the North pole so seeing so much thought put into it is really nice

We never see where Sandy works/lives (in the MOVIE. But the GAME on the other hand lets you explore EVERYONE’S homes and that’s a whole nother story)

We DO however see Pitch’s lair and

it’s rightfully spooky. When you actually see the scene play out in the lair, you get all confused and don’t know which way is which and it always unsettles me which is GOOD because that’s what it’s SUPPOSED to do

What’s really unique about ROTG is that there’s a source material (and as of now there are eight books (five novels, three picture books) and the series isn’t DONE yet) and instead of turning the books into a movie even though the plot is literally RIGHT THERE, they took the source material and turned it into a prologue. The movie takes place about 300 years after the books do and since the books are supposedly still ongoing, and William Joyce was CONTINUING to write the series while the movie was in production. (Three books have come out since the movie came out.)

I love how challenging that must have been for William to try to include stuff from his previous books in the movie AND to try and link the movie to his newer books despite some continuity errors (also worth noting that he has written a book about Santa and his wife, but Mrs. Claus is YET to be seen or even mentioned in the movie) but I appreciate the effort he put into it and I can’t wait to see what else he’ll come up with.

The characters look a BIT different from their book counterparts

Jack is voiced by Chris Pine and his voice is WAY TOO DEEP and the creators can’t agree on an age for him (book age is 14, but he can age himself up and down to a certain point and some producers said they imagined him 17 or 18) and (imo) I think Jack’s design was pretty lazy (a blue jacket with brown pants) compared to everyone else’s. I mean you have North, who is 

BIG

His design is based more on the worldly Father Christmas than the Saint Nick/Santa that we know. 

When he’s not in the Pole he’s wearing his big red fur coat and a cossack hat

Because he’s Russian

I’m pretty sure he canonically was raised by bears but that may have just been me imagining it. His book appearance is way different because when we meet him, he’s not Santa yet. So he’s still young

Of course, as the books go on, he looks like Santa

Bunny has the most drastic character change from his book design, as depicted by this fanart (which i couldn’t find a credit for that wasn’t pinterest so if anyone knows please tell me)

And there’s a CANONICAL reason why he looks so different (two actually)

Once they put Hugh Jackman in the role, they wanted a more dry Australian ranger-type design for him, and then the robes got in the way because of how he was moving, even when they changed him to just a lab coat, so they decided to forgo clothes altogether

Fun fact about Bunny. He’s a Pooka, a shapeshifting folklore creature that can turn into either a rabbit, goat, cat, dog, or horse. (or even a human with animal like features) Which actually gives a lot of people the headcanon that Pitch uses the souls of all Bunny’s dead people (yep he’s a sole survivor) as Nightmares

But he’s a different kind of Pooka. He’s an alien technically. And this breed of Pooka CANNOT eat chocolate because it does things to their body. Like giving him six arms. Or making his ears into helicopter propellers. 

This is relevant because he uses chocolate in battle multiple times. So the canonical explanation for why Bunny looks so different is that he ate too much chocolate and it permanently changed his body.

Which I love. I could go on about him but all the characters are interesting

Tooth has probably the second most confusing design

She’s based off a hummingbird with dragonfly wings, which aesthetically makes so much sense, but in the books she has regular feather wings. I also don’t like how weird her proportions are. Her feet are tiny nubs, her head is too big for her body (her body is actually pretty nicely designed it’s just every other part of it that bothers me) and I already mentioned the whitewashing

PITCH on the other hand had the biggest glow down compared to the books

He’s just wearing a black robe and, apparently, he doesn’t even have sleeves, which you can’t even really tell because it’s just all smudgy and shit

I mean I guess that’s the point, that he looks like he’s clothed in shadow, but it’s frustrating to look at especially compared to his book design where he’s wearing a FABULOUS coat

Meanwhile Sandy has the PERFECT character design

He’s just ROUND and wears a bathrobe made of sand. Like it’s not even that different from his book design (his hair has more frills than the book version) because it’s such a perfect design and I love how he’s animated. You can’t see it that well because the gif quality, but the sand also sparkles and it just makes it so fun to watch on screen 

The movie itself has its share of flaws. (the movie likes to pick and choose the rules it wants to follow about its universe, a huge plothole, and some cheaply constructed arguments between characters that really just make me annoyed because I don’t want to see the easter bunny making a child cry I want to see him get into a fist fight with Santa it’s like you don’t even KNOW your demographic) But I love it and there’s SO MUCH I could talk about. There are characters in the books that weren’t in the movie and there were characters in the movie that weren’t in the books (because they weren’t born yet but IRRELEVANT) 

It was a HUGE flop despite critics praising it. Like 8,000 people lost their jobs over it that’s how big a flop it was. But it’s such a dear movie to me and it’s clear that William Joyce holds this series close to his heart (dedicating it and the movie to his late daughter) which makes sense because it’s based on stories he told her when she was young and I’m so honored that he chose to share these stories with us. I just love the series and I should do a re-read at some point