#but if you're constantly looking for shit??

[the-final-sif]

None of these and several of these. This is my yard, where I'm constantly working on projects and shit. Sometimes it's an art gallery sometimes it's a picnic. You can walk up to me and talk to me about stuff if I'm here. Hell if you're polite you can come look around. Sometimes I'm getting into a shouting match with the neighbor. It's just my yard and what I do here. Also it's a bit on fire but that's fine.

[the-odd-shu]

Fluffy scenarios for clear skin

Another Lab Illustrator Reader installation!

Masterlist

Previous:

Characters: Jayce, Viktor, Gender Neutral Reader (Reader uses they/them pronouns)

Established: Jayce/Viktor/Reader (POLYCULLLEEE)

Reader to Jayce: Do you ever look at Viktor when he's thinking and want to kiss every inch of his face?

Jayce taking a slow sip from his hot drink: No. I think he would bite me if I tried.

Reader: Maybe. But whenever he pouts, his eyes go all thoughtful and distant, and I can hardly control myself.

Jayce: Please continue to control yourself. I don't want to have to write an accident report because you lost a nose.

Reader sighs again: Would you bite my nose off if I kissed every inch of your face instead?

Jayce no-rizz Talis then proceeds to choke and nearly perish on his drink.

In summary, Reader's partners sometimes give them cuteness aggression.

Just the image of Viktor doing that adorable pouting face, and Reader calmly setting down their pen, getting up, crossing over to Jayce's desk to get rid of their cuteness aggression via kisses on poor Jayce instead.

I kind of like the idea of them doing this instead of crowding Viktor when he's clearly trying to think. Whereas Jayce is just constantly on the look out for touch and validation, so it works out great for him. He melts under the attention, more than happy to put his notes aside for a moment in favour of a rather lovely excuse for a break.

They're quiet about it, but sometimes the movement will pull Viktor out of his musings regardless, and he'll just frown at the pair of them acting like idiots.

And if he insinuates he's feeling a little left out, you bet Reader is going to calmly drag him close and touch temples with him - a deeply personal Zaunite display of affection - which would have a whole new adorable expression appearing on Viktor's face and would send Reader IMMEDIATELY into going back to attack Jayce instead of smothering to poor, overwhelmed man.

In a similar vein of thinking, it would definitely be manadatory for Reader to give into it, just once.

Maybe Jayce is conveniently out of the room, and maybe Viktor is just RIGHT THERE, PLAINLY in sight. And maybe, just this once they SIMPLY CANNOT contain themselves. Viktor is right there and they're not getting any work done because they can't tear their eyes off him.

So they give in, and pepper Viktor's adorable pout with kisses. And the man is just BAFFLED! It takes him a moment to understand what is happening, and then he's letting out flustered strings of words in both his mother's tongue and Piltovern Common, and he's shoving them away by their cheeks.

Reader of course isn't deterred, and just ends up grabbing the hand to kiss his knuckles. Viktor glares down at them with a look of resignation and burning red ears.

Jayce comes in like: what did I miss.

Reader: Turns out he doesn't bite.

Viktor: Not yet. Don't tempt me.

Jayce is rewarded with a forehead touch for simply existing that time round - the significance is not lost on him and he feels touched.

Viktor's that choatic boyfriend that hears you complaining about a colleague one too many times, and then proceeds to inconvenience them in the most subtle and irritating way known to man, all whilst giving you a shit-eating little smirk as he sits back and watches the world burn.

"That fucker giving you trouble Darling? No worries, I stole all of his left socks and buried them in the staff room plant pot after hours."

"They said what about Jayce?" A beat of silence.

"Viktor?! Where are you going with that washing up liquid."

"Nowhere." Very obviously makes his way to the kitchen.

Said co-worker that was talking shit then begins complaining that every cup of coffee they make tastes like soap!

Someone talks shit about their partners:

Jayce 'can we talk about this' Talis: "here is a thirty page essay as to why you're wrong, and I have a PowerPoint slide prepared with additional evidence if you will please take a seat and allow me to reeducate you."

Viktor who will resort to psychological warfare to get his point across correcting them, whilst also blatantly gaslighting them into believing that Jayce and Reader can do no wrong, and they were in fact crazy for insinuating such cruel things about either of them to begin with.

Reader who stabs first with their artist-grade scalpel, and asks questions when they're incapacitated and bleeding out on their floor: "Say that again, to my face this time. Go on, I dare you."

(There is a reason why Jayce and Viktor ((the pacifists)) do not teach Reader how to use any of the hextech devices. They will commit murder and refuse to regret it whilst Jayce sweats bullets and Viktor stares on, mouth aghast by the sheer brutality of said murder).

"He deserved it," Reader will explain simply.

And Viktor will go, "perhaps, BUT YOU COULD HAVE LEFT HIS HEAD ATTACHED!"

Jayce who's trauma raises its head when his partners are cold. Blankets. Warm drinks. Heating on full blast. That snow storm did a number on him and he HATES the winter because of it.

Are you shivering? Is Viktor? No stress, he shall simply have to BECOME the blanket to keep you both alive and well. It is as sweet as it is heartbreaking.

Viktor who's upbringing in Zaun sometimes makes him precious with food. Not because he was starving, but because sometimes he couldn't have as much food as he wanted, simply because money was tight growing up.

Maybe he has a sweet treat, and ends up breaking it into threes to share with you and Jayce.

Maybe there's only one tea bag left, so he settles for water, despite having REALLY wanted that cup of warm tea.

Maybe he's waiting for seconds for dinner, but there's only enough left for two more portions, so he says he's not hungry anymore.

Viktor who will sometimes feel the gnaw of hunger but make a hot drink to soothe his stomach instead of actually eating something, because its only so far into the day, and if he doesn't eat now, then he won't be as hungry later-

Safe to say, his partners notice. And Jayce keeps the kitchenette well stocked with drinks and snacks alike, whilst Reader will stop by a bakery or cafe in the morning to bring him a proper breakfast, as well as breakfast for themselves and Jayce so he doesn't feel like he HAS to share.

[trainer-from-unova]

master of puppets

𖤐 bandom blog: @princess-lvcifer 𖤐 english ao3 𖤐 spanish ao3 𖤐 edits 𖤐 kofi 𖤐

ship: eddie munson x f!reader

summary: where you play d&d with the hellfire club as a substitute

a/n: shameless self insert and retelling and lots of metallica references / i wrote this in summer 2022 / english isn't my first language

cw: none

word count: 2.8k

She was in the school canteen during break time, sitting at the table where she and her friends always sat. She was listening to the conversation her friends were having, when suddenly, something, or rather someone, caught her attention, and not just hers and her friends', but that of everyone in the lunchroom.

Suddenly Eddie, the boy she liked, jumped up on the table where he was with his friends and started shouting and addressing people in the lunchroom.

"...As long as you're into band...!" he said, looking at the musicians in the high school band. "Or science...!" he said, looking at the scientists. "...or parties" he said looking at the revellers, and one of them gave him the finger, but it was obvious that he didn't mind at all. "Or a game where you toss BALLS INTO LAUNDRY BASKETS...!" He said even louder, putting his hands to the sides of his mouth and looking at the members of the basketball team.

Someone screamed "Loser!"

"You want something, freak?" asked the team leader. Eddie put his hands on his head, index fingers raised to resemble demon horns, and stuck out his tongue and made funny noises.

She laughed in amusement. She didn't know him well, but he was clearly outgoing and didn't give a shit what other people thought of him, and she loved that in a man. He was also her type physically: long and curly dark hair with fringes, tight jeans torn at the knees, silver chains, skull rings, rock and metal band t-shirts, black leather jacket, denim waistcoat.... And to top it all off, he had a lovely smile and common tastes with her.

Occasionally they would talk, if nodding to each other in the halls of high school and saying "Cool t-shirt" when they were both wearing rock and metal band t-shirts counted as talking.

"Is that your man?" asked her best friend as she gave her a dirty look, to which she nudged her to shut up and stop looking at her like that. She didn't want anyone inappropriate to know that she liked him, not because she was ashamed of him, but because she didn't want him to know, especially not like that.

"Yes, it is, and shut up."

The leader of the basketball team decided it would be a waste of time to fight with Eddie, he simply whispered "Prik" and sat back down in his seat.

"...what's KILLING THE KIDS!" he said as he ran around the table, jumping down to yell at a passing teacher, scaring her and pinning her against a pillar.

Some cheerleaders were passing by and he stepped aside and let them pass with a wave of his arm, and she wished she was one of them.

He said something else but she couldn't hear him over the distance between their tables and all the noise in the lunchroom, and she saw him sit back down in his seat and start eating, though within a minute she heard him yell "Shut up."

And then she saw him get up again after a few seconds. Not that she looked at him constantly, but she had him in her field of vision, so she couldn't help looking at him. That she sat where she sat because of that? Maybe. So she could use it as an excuse, if someone caught her looking at him too much.

He was talking to his younger friends, and pointed to the older ones. Then he pointed to himself with both hands. Then he started fidgeting excitedly, pulled his finger out looking at nothing, raised his fist and started moving around the lunchroom excited and laughing. He was a restless ass.

He crouched down between his smaller friends and put his hands on their shoulders. Then he grabbed them by the back of the collars of their t-shirts, which were Hellfire Club by the way, and walked them down the main aisle of the lunchroom.

He scanned all the tables in front of him starting from his left, gesturing for them to look in the same direction as him. Their gazes met, and she nodded at him, trying to contain her smile. He did the same, though more subtly because he was busy saying God knows what to those kids, but he also smiled back.

The hours at school always pass too slowly, but especially on Fridays. She and her friends were about to leave the school to go to the house of one of them and spend the rest of the afternoon there, when they were stopped by Eddie's younger friends.

"Do you play Dungeons and Dragons?" asked the boy in the cap.

"We need a substitute at the Hellfire Club," said the other boy.

"Yes, we do play," said ________'s male best friend.

"Really?" asked the boy in the cap, surprised and happy at the same time.

"Great!" said the other boy.

"The problem is that we have a game this afternoon too..."

"Oh fuck."

"She can go," said _______'s female best friend, pointing at her. "She knows how to play but she never plays," which was true, the games seemed ridiculously long and she got bored, so when her friends were playing she stood to one side, eating snacks while watching TV or flipping through magazines.

They wanted to ask about it, but it wasn't the time for that, it was the time to beg her to go with them. Even if she didn't know how to play, it was good enough for them.

"Can you come? Please."

"Eddie will kill us if we don't come with a substitute for our friend Lucas, who can't come because he's playing in the basketball game tonight."

"Of course, of course. No problem, don't worry."

The time came and she was a little nervous, to be honest. Mike and Dustin, as those boys were called, escorted her to the place where the game would be played, in the high school theatre.

"We're all here!" Dustin said.

"We're bringing a substitute!" Mike said.

Eddie's heart stopped. Was she really going to be Lucas's substitute? Did they know Eddie liked her and brought her here to screw with him and get on his nerves as revenge for not wanting to cancel the game that day? He will kill them.

"Hello, everyone," she waved, looking at everyone one by one.

She was trying her best to hide her nerves. Not only was she nervous about being with Eddie, but maybe he, and not just him, but the rest of his friends as well, didn't want to play with girls, considering them inadequate. Mike and Dustin were nervous too, they didn't know how Eddie and the rest would take it if the substitute was a girl.

They looked at _______ and then looked at Eddie, looking for a reaction, a response to his presence. He was the leader, the Dangeon Master.

"The warriors bring a princess!" he said, getting up and going to her direction. He took her hand, leaned down and kissed it, making her blush and scream inwardly like mad. "Do you play Dungeons and Dragons?"

"My friends, but they're busy this afternoon with their game. I'm the only one who doesn't play, but I know. I hope I'm not disturbing..." she whispered.

"What are you talking about? It's a pleasure to have you here, and even more so in need of a substitute. Welcome to the club," he smiled.

"Thank you," she said, calmer now.

"The hooded cultists chant "Hail Lord Vecna"..." said Eddie in a whisper, very serious and concentrated, looking at each one, "Hail Lord Vecna..." They turn to you, hands, remove their hoods..." he said, gesturing as if he himself were wearing a hood and taking it off, "You recognize most of them from Makbar, but there is one you do not recognize... His skin shriveled, desiccated... And something else... He is not only missing his left arm...!" he said, pulling his left arm behind his back, "BUT HIS LEFT EYE!" he shouted, covering his left eye with his right hand.

"No, it can't be!" cried Mike, holding his hands to his face.

"Vecna's dead!"

"He was killed by Kas!!" said Mike.

"So it was thought, my friends, sooo it was thought. But Vecna," he said, picking up a figurine, "LIVE!" Eddie's passion for the game was both admirable and adorable. "You are scared, you're tired, you are injured... Do you flee Vecna and his cultists? Or stand your ground and fight? Come on." Everyone was confused and undecided, still processing the sudden and unexpected information. They decided.

"I say we fight, to the death," said Dustin.

"To the death," said Mike.

Everyone, including her, started shouting "To the death," and Eddie laughed. It was what he wanted to see. Besides, he saw her laugh too. What he didn't know was that he had caught her smile.

"Time-out, time-out!"

Everyone got up from the table and gathered in a circle to discuss the game, shoulder to shoulder.

"Guys, I hate to say this, but we've got to flee."

"I concur."

"Yes, we're getting the shit kicked out of us, but... Didn't we say to death?" she asked, genuinely confused.

"That wasn't literal."

"Vecna just decimated us. We can't kill him with two players."

She turned her head slightly and looked at Eddie, and he nodded at her as he did when they passed each other in the high school hallway, and she smiled at him and turned back to pay attention to the conversation.

"You too? He only has 15 hit points left, don't be pussies"

"Pussies? Really? 'Cause we're not delusional?"

"Hey," said Eddie, getting everyone's attention, which is what he wanted. "If I may interject, gentlemen... And princess," he winked at _______, making her bite her lip to keep from grinning like a fool from ear to ear, but it was hard for her to behave he acting like that. "Whilst I respect the passion, you'd be wise to take Gareth the Great's concern to heart. "There is no shame in running". Don't try be heroes. Not today," he smiled, "'kay?"

"...One sec," said Dustin, and they all turned to discuss, "What do you think, Mike?"

"How many hit points do you and ______ have left?" he asked.

"12," they both answered at the same time.

"It's risky as hell" said Mike, "but you're the ones on the battlefield... So it's your call."

"What do you say, _______?" Dustin asked.

"Yeah, ...right?" she asked a little confused.

"Yeah, screw it" Dustin said, and they all turned to look at Eddie, "let's kill the son of a bitch."

"The chances of success are 20-to-1!"

"Never tell me the odds" said Dustin, holding up his index finger, "give me the D20" he said to Eddie, and Eddie did as he was told and threw it to Dustin.

He threw the dice and rolled an 11.

"That's! A! Miss!" said Eddie, grinning from ear to ear and shaking his head.

"No!"

"Shit, shit!" He was so irritated that he even threw a can of soda.

"Not to pressure you, but.... It's up to you," Mike told _______.

She was scared, it was a lot of pressure. She knew how much this game meant to everyone here, and now it all depended on her and her luck, which she felt was usually not very good. She looked at Eddie, and he nodded. That comforted her, gave her the confidence to go on and move forward.

She took the dice and locked them in her hands as she shook them to shake the dice. Everyone looked at her expectantly.

"Please!"

"Come on, please!"

And then she threw it. She felt that as she waited for the die to fall, roll and stop, life was in slow motion.

"20!"

Everyone screamed with excitement and clapped their hands together. Eddie couldn't believe it either, he thought they were all dead.

"That's why we play!" he said.

With the game over, there was nothing more to do there, so they packed up and headed for the exit of the theatre, but when Eddie didn't follow them, she stopped and stood there.

"Shall I help you pack up?" she asked as she approached him.

"No need, don't worry," he said as he put the things in his backpack, "you've helped enough. Thank you. I hope you've entertained yourself at least a little," he said as he zipped up his backpack.

"Yes! You make it very interesting," she said as she picked up two folding chairs and put them back in their places.

"Me?" he said as he approached her to take the chairs out of her hands and not let her help him pick them up. She grimaced in annoyance but went on her way to get more chairs.

"Yes, you put a lot of passion into it, it's nice to see someone happy doing something they love," she said as she approached him, where he had left the folding chairs he had just taken out of her hands, while he went to pick up the remaining ones, plus his throne and the table.

"Oh, you're going to make me blush!" he said, turning to look at her as he walked backwards towards the rest of the furniture, while covering his face with strands of hair.

"And you haven't thought of putting on some music to set the mood? Something like... Master of Puppets?"

"What a great song, for fuck's sake!" he said excited, laughing and clapping his hands.

It was the first time they were talking so much and they were happy. Besides, they were alone, and in a dark place with dim, coloured lighting.

"I'm learning to play it on the guitar," he reported.

"Let's see when I see you play something."

"Whenever you like," he felt like telling her that he could touch whatever she wanted, with a double meaning, but he didn't dare be so obscene, especially with her. He didn't know how she would take it.

They went on packing up the theatre and left it together, walking and talking in the corridors.

"I think we won," she said, referring to the high school basketball team as she took in the atmosphere outside.

"It looks like it. Is someone coming to pick you up?"

"Yes, I have to call my mother to come," she said, pointing to a phone box.

"If you want me to drive you home, or wait with you for your mother to come and pick you up here," he said the second option, assuming she probably wouldn't want to be alone in his car with him.

"The first option is fine," she said to his surprise.

They went to the car park and got into Eddie's car.

"Do you want to listen to something?" he asked before starting the car.

"What do you have?" she asked.

"Metallica, Megadeth, Dio, Black Sabbath, Iron Maiden..."

"Metallica. Which album is it?"

"Ride the lighting," he said.

"Wow, my favourite!" she smiled.

"Yes? Mine is Kill 'em all," he said as he inserted the cassette.

"I love it too, I consider it better than Ride the lighting," she said while the intro of Fight fire with fire, the first song of that album, started to play, "because Ride has songs I don't like and I like absolutely all the songs on Kill, but I like the songs I like on Ride much more compared to the ones on Kill. Do you know what I mean?" she laughed nervously.

"No, can you explain it to me again, please?" He said jokingly as he started the car, making her smile even more. "Where am I taking you, princess?"

She showed him where her house was and on the way they sang the Metallica songs from the cassette they were listening to.

"It's in that house," she said, pointing to it, and he parked in front of it. "Well, then.... Thank you so much for letting me play with you guys, for bringing me here... For everything."

"Thanks to you. Mm, could I have your phone number, by the way...?" he asked a little nervously. "For when you want to meet me to see me play, or we can also meet sometime to listen to music and sing together. This has been fun."

"Yes, perfect! I was about to ask you the same thing, actually."

Eddie pulled out a black ink pen and a random piece of paper from the glove compartment and handed it to her. He noticed her smile as he wrote down her number, he wanted to memorise it.

"Here you go," she said, handing him back the pen and paper.

"Thank you."

"Can I have yours too, please?"

"Sure," and he wrote down his number on the paper and tore it up, handing the piece with his number on it to her.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"Well, then..." She unlocked the passenger door and opened it. "My pleasure," she said as she got out of the car and waved goodbye, "I'll see you around."

"Same here, princess."

[tired-xyra-urstruly]

Wait, They Don't Love You Like

I Love You

Ft. Rin Itoshi

Synopsis: Rin was made to tutor you much to his demise.

Warnings: I did not proofread this.

Genre: Fluff, Crack

A/N: Christmas gift for my friend 👅 it's low-key ass but it's fine

“Shit.” was the first word that came out of your mouth after processing what was right in front of you. Not only one but TWO grades below 80. But you weren't worried about your grade, you couldn't care less about it. It was your parents that worried you. You looked down at your grade avoiding the principals and your parents' gazes. If only the ground would swallow you whole right now to drown all of their complaints and expectations from you.

Of course it should've been expected as someone who constantly would get into trouble every other day, it's a miracle you haven't been expelled yet. One of the biggest catastrophes you've caused was planting tear gas into a classroom which got you more than a week of suspension.

“Well, Mr. And Mrs. [Last Name], if it would please you, we can assign your child a private tutor from the school.” The principal interrupted your parents' whines and complaints causing them to pause for a moment. You didn't even need to look at them to know that they were more than pleased with the idea. Not wanting to listen to the planning of tutoring you slipped away out of the office unnoticed.

〔❨✧✧❩〕

You sat alone in the classroom watching the door waiting for your supposed tutor to enter. A few minutes passed by until the door finally opened to reveal the next victim of your presence, Rin Itoshi. Well, he wasn't exactly new to your antics.

“Oh my GYATT. Rinnie Rinnn!!” You lit up seeing him and in return his face instantly shifted into one of annoyance once he heard you call him by that stupid nickname. He was so tempted to walk right out of the door and abandon you.

“Don't call me by that cursed name, lukewarm.” he replied coldly sitting across from you.

“Aw but it's so cute and it suits you.”

“Shut up it isn't.”

“Bbbut–” You got cut off.

“No buts. I was called here to tutor you not to play into your games or whatever you're scheming.”

You sighed pouting at him to no avail. He brought out a pen and paper from his own bag and gave you a look expecting you to do the same. Unfortunately, you didn't bring any, so you just looked at him with pleading eyes. He sighed heavily seeing that familiar look in your eyes you would do.

“Bring your own next time.” He gave you a pen and paper.

“On skibidi won't do it again Rin Rin.”

He flinched once he heard his name being butchered into one of your stupid nicknames again.

“I was called here because you're failing math and English.” he started trying to get to the point to get it over with while you were looking everywhere else in the room except at him to avoid actually getting any work done.

“Pish posh my parents are lying they just want me to be tutored to get my grades better.” That was by far the worst excuse he's ever heard in his entire life.

“Shut it Half-baked. I'm here tutoring you when I could be making better use of my time.”

You let out a loud exaggerated sigh out and picked up the pen and looked at him so you could get this over with.

“Yappity yap yap yap yap yap yap” went the academic boy. He didn't actually say that though that's all you heard. You naturally had to look at him since he was the one teaching after all and he'd probably scold you if he saw you distracted.

Your gaze trailed over his features, his jaw, his eyes, anything you could absorb about him.

…

“Do you understand?” Rin snapped you out of your trance dragging you back to reality. Have you been staring too long? Oh shit nothing was written on your paper.

Rin stared at you then your paper obviously Livid knowing you weren't listening and he wasted precious time on a stupid ass like you. You glanced at the clock seeing it's been around thirty minutes of staring and zoning out. In response you could only give a shit eating smirk.

“On gyatt I understand.” You didn't understand a single thing. All Rin could do was pinch the bridge of his nose and sigh in disappointment. “This is why you'll never pass high school.”

The next few minutes you had left that was allotted to this tutoring period passed with you and Rin exchanging banter and him occasionally giving you insults which you would never admit but you felt your heart being stabbed when he said those insults.

Regrettably, the session had to eventually come to an end. Walking home, you sighed, unable to annoy anyone with your presence anymore. Walking home you wondered how Rin was doing… Oh my god why are you thinking of him you bastard. WHY ARE YOU SO CONSCIOUS ABOUT IT?????

〔❨✧✧❩〕

It felt like no time passed at all, you were back in the same classroom waiting for Rin to arrive. You started fidgeting with your pen staring at the door and the clock above it counting the seconds before Rin would walk through.

You jolted up when the doorknob turned over revealing your as always beautiful tutor, Rin. He glanced at you and then the materials played out on your desk a little bit relieved to see you kept your promise of bringing your own materials.

“Heyyy Rinnie Rin!!” The feeling of relief was short lived and then replaced with the feeling of irritation again.

He ignores your stupid greeting and sits down across from you which receives a frown. “Are you really going to ignore my glorious greeting I bothered to say.” You asked him which in return made him flinch once again. He didn't like your cocky replies a bit.

“I won't if you stop using those shitty names, lukewarm.”

“You're no fun at all.”

He then proceeded to start the lecture again by tutoring you, this time you actually took notes. They were low effort but hey you did take notes. Occasionally you would get distracted… but Rin was way too determined to get this over with to allow you to zone out for too long.

Again, the session had to unfortunately end. The process repeated for a while now, the only difference was you were slowly worsening. Why? Well…

“You're too pretty.” Rin was dumbfounded for a moment, you saw it for a split second. He simply asked you why you weren't improving nor making an effort to.

“Even so, it's not an excuse.”

“But it's the truth.” Yeah gng you were just nonchalant like that. “Speaking of which, are you free anytime soon?”

“No.” You once again pouted.

“But you have no games coming up.”

“I use my time to get better.”

“Can you skip one training session for me pleaseeee.”

Rin let out an irritated sigh before responding, “Just one if it will make you stop nagging me.”

Your jaw dropped to the floor. You did NOT expect him to give up this easily, especially when you made him give up one of his training sessions which is something he treated like his fucking lifeline. Honestly, Rin didn't expect this either, he couldn't think straight when he was placed in the same room as you. Maybe your stupidness was contagious.

You felt like your heart would just crawl out of your mouth with it still being open from shock. When you finally regained your composure you still couldn't muster up to say anything.

“Sooooo it's a date then!!” You voiced, filling in the awkward silence.

“Wait what.” What the fuck did he just agree to? Next thing he knew, you weren't across him anymore but latching onto him like a parasite.

“Love you Rinnie Rin.” He wouldn't say it back. You looked up at him and you could see a pale pink rise In his cheeks, it served as a good enough answer to you.

End.

Tags: @tofumiarchives @yui2aku

[aahsokaatano]

I've lived in several different places in the US, from "right on the edge of a major metropolis" to "I can hear the banjos from Deliverance if I walk the dogs too far in one direction" and I have to say, I agree strongly with all of the above. And this was never more obvious to me than when I was living in a tourist area.

When you live in a tourist destination, especially if it's a very small and contained area (like, say, the Florida Keys), you're probably looking at a 40 to 60 minute drive one way to get to basic shit like a Target, or a Home Depot. Sure, there is technically a walkable shopping area very nearby... but it's all aimed at the tourists. So it's cheap novelty t-shirts, and $2 sandals, or extremely high-end stuff that you could never even hope to afford.

The Keys are roughly 100 miles long, from Key Largo to Key West, with only 1 road for the vast majority of it. When there is an accident on that road - which happens frequently, because people drink in the Keys like it's going out of style - depending on where exactly it happens, it can close down the entire Keys in both directions for hours.

There are only four grocery stores in the entirety of the Keys. There are roughly 25 islands in the chain - granted, most people are centered around Key Largo, Islamorada, Marathon, and Key West, but there are houses up and down most of US 1. It's not only impossible for most people to walk anywhere from their houses, it's practically suicidal with the way people drive.

We used Amazon constantly when we lived in the Keys. We also signed up for one of those food delivery services - not the meal prep ones, but like "every month you get a few pounds of frozen meat delivered to your door" - because it was both easier, cheaper, and safer for us to be driving on US 1 as little as possible.

Putting in more buses, more high speed trains, more shuttles, more ferries... It would just be better on literally every single level for us.

there is no ethical consumption under capitalism

Years ago now, I remember seeing the rape prevention advice so frequently given to young women - things like dressing sensibly, not going out late, never being alone, always watching your drink - reframed as meaning, essentially, "make sure he rapes the other girl." This struck a powerful chord with me, because it cuts right to the heart of the matter: that telling someone how to lower their own chances of victimhood doesn't stop perpetrators from existing. Instead, it treats the existence of perpetrators as a foregone conclusion, such that the only thing anyone can do is try, by their own actions, to be a less appealing or more difficult victim.

And the thing is, ever since the assassination of United Healthcare CEO Brian Thompson, I've kept on thinking about how, in this day and age, CEOs of big companies often have an equal or greater impact on the day to day lives of regular people than our elected officials, and yet we have almost no legal way to redress any grievances against them - even when their actions, as in the case of Thompson's stewardship of UHC, arguably see them perpetrating manslaughter at scale through tactics like claims denial. That this is a real, recurring thing that happens makes the American healthcare insurance industry a particularly pernicious example, but it's far from being the only one. Because the original premise of the free market - the idea that we effectively "vote" for or against businesses with our dollars, thereby causing them to sink or swim on their individual merits - is utterly broken, and has been for decades, assuming it was ever true at all. In this age of megacorporations and global supply chains, the vast majority of people are dependent on corporations for necessities such as gas, electricity, internet access, water, food, housing and medical care, which means the consumer base is, to all intents and purposes, a captive market. We might not have to buy a specific brand, but we have to buy a brand, and as businesses are constantly competing with one another to bring in profits, not just for the company and its workers, but for C-suites and shareholders - profits that increasingly come at the expense of workers and consumers alike - the greediest, most inhumane corporations set the financial yardstick against which all others are then, of necessity, measured. Which means that, while businesses are not obliged to be greedy and inhumane in order to exist, overwhelmingly, they become greedy and humane in order to compete, because capitalism encourages it, and because there are precious few legal restrictions to stop them from doing so. At the same time, a handful of megacorporations own so many market-dominating brands that, without both significant personal wealth and the time and resources to find viable alternatives, it's all but impossible to avoid them, while the ubiquity of the global supply chain means that, even if you can keep track of which company owns which brand, it's much, much harder to establish which suppliers provide the components that are used in the products bearing their labels. Consider, for instance, how many mainstream American brands are functionally run on sweatshop labour in other parts of the world: places where these big corporations have outsourced their workforce to skirt the already minimal labour and wage protections they'd be obliged to adhere to in the US, all to produce (say) electronics whose elevated sticker price passes a profit on to the company, but without resulting in higher wages for either the sweatshop workers overseas or the American employees selling the products in branded US stores.

When basically every major electronics corporation is engaged in similar business practices, there is no "vote" our money can bring that causes the industry itself to be better regulated - and as wealthy, powerful lobbyists from these industries continue to pay exorbitant sums of money to politicians to keep government regulation at a minimum, even our actual votes can do little to effect any sort of change. But even in those rare instances where new regulations are passed, for multinational corporations, laws passed in one country overwhelmingly don't prevent them from acting abusively overseas, exploiting more desperate populations and cash-poor governments to the same greedy, inhumane ends. And where the ultimate legal penalty for proven transgressions is, more often than not, a fine - which is to say, a fee; which is to say, an amount which, while astronomical by the standards of regular people, still frequently costs the company less than the profits earned through their unethical practices, and which is paid from corporate coffers rather than the bank accounts of the CEOs who made the decisions - big corporations are, in essence, free to act as badly as they can afford to; which is to say, very. Contrary to the promise of the free market, therefore, we as consumers cannot meaningfully "vote" with our dollars in a way that causes "good" businesses to rise to the top, because everything is too interconnected. Our choices under global capitalism are meaningless, because there is no other system we can financially support that stands in opposition to it, and while there are still small businesses and companies who try to operate ethically, both their comparative smallness and their interdependent reliance on the global supply chain means that, even if we feel better about our choices, we're not exerting any meaningful pressure on the system we're trying to change. Which means that, under the free market, trying to be an ethical consumer is functionally equivalent to a young woman dressing modestly, not going out alone and minding her drink at parties in order to avoid being raped. We're not preventing corporate predation or sending a message to corporate predators: we're just making sure they screw other worker, the other consumer, the other guy.

All of which is to say: while I'd prefer not to live in a world where shooting someone dead in the street is considered a valid means of redressing grievances, what the murder of Brian Thompson has shown is that, if you provide no meaningful recourse for justice against abusive, exploitative members of the 1%, then violence done to those people will have the feel of justice, because it fills the void left by the lack of consequences for their actions. It's the same reason why people had little sympathy for the jackass OceanGate CEO who killed himself in his imploding sub, or anyone whose yacht has been attacked by orcas - it's just intensified here, because where the OceanGate CEO was felled by hubris and the yachts were random casualties, whoever killed Thomspon did so deliberately, because of what he did. It was direct action against a man whose policies very arguably constituted manslaughter at scale; a crime which ought to be a crime, but which has, to date, been permitted under the law. And if the law wouldn't stop him, can anyone be surprised that someone might act outside the law in retaliation - or that regular people would cheer for them when they did?

[femmesandhoney]

out of curiosity, is there a reason you feel the need to constantly have conversations with radmona outside of DMs and putting it on everyone’s dash? it’s kind of giving ‘look i swear I have friends’ and maybe just, you know, message privately like other people without something to prove?

lmao sometimes jokes i wanna have w her are only funny in a tumblr post format. im not trying to have a convo with her on tumblr, im usually already speaking w her while i make a separate joke post thats formated for tumblr and not our discord chat just to make her laugh more. if it looks odd from the outside looking in whelp sorry, you're not the audience for an inside joke im making 😭 this is literally a half radfem half me shitting around w my friends blog so indeed there are times i just wanna annoy my friends on here too.

[fbfh]

Could I request a drabble with Dave Lizewski and his best friend who has a major crush on Kick Ass and tells Dave all the dirty details?

OOOOOH SCRUMDIDDLYUMPTIOUS. aged up to 18+ obvs, give me a hoot or holler in the notes or my ask box if you want a fluffier version lol

Dave always wondered why girls never noticed him. he figured it was cause he's a quiet geeky nerd who likes comic books and superheroes. nope. it's because of you. when you first met Dave - however old you were, freshman, middle schoolers, kindergarteners - you latched the fuck onto this boy so fast. you've always been protective over him, always had that vibe that says you fuck with him, I'll fuck you up. besides, having a best friend as hot as you immediately made everyone assume he's totally off the market. like, it should be obvious. being "best friends" with someone as hot as you, spending all your time together - you have sleepovers for god's sake. EVERYONE at school fully believes you're fucking. the only ones unaware of this are Dave and Todd and Marty and possibly yourself.

it's at one of these infamous sleepovers that you finally spilled the beans. you've been obsessing over kickass for weeks, constantly talking about him and his exploits to Dave. you just got your hands on another grainy, horribly low quality picture of kickass stopping a purse snatching from someone's video doorbell. you're sitting at Dave's desk while he's flopped on his bed, finishing some homework.

"fuck I want him in my mouth so fucking bad..."

it just slips out, but Dave is instantly hard. he startles, sputtering and desperate to know who his best friend is practically moaning for.

"y-you want who?!" he demands in confusion at your sudden outburst, causing both of you to laugh. you turn the monitor towards him, and Dave sees himself looking back. his stomach does the thing, that flippy jerky oh shit thing from both anxiety and horniness. he is really, really hard now.

"k-kickass?" he asks, his voice getting all whiny and cracking in that way you've always found so cute.

"yes!" you exclaim with a laugh, looking at him incredulously. "come on Dave, you told me about a sex dream you had about our math teacher two days ago. he groans half heartedly at you bringing up.

"I already regret telling you about that." he protests playfully, his voice muffled into his duvet.

"just look at him," you sigh, already looking at the pictures of kickass. "look at his arms... I'd probably cum just from him putting me in a headlock."

Dave nearly chokes on his spit. He's really glad he's laying on his stomach so you can't see the way he's kind of rubbing against his mattress. it's not on purpose or anything, it's not like he's trying to get off to his best friend (even though he has before. like a lot. like he has to clear his porn search history because it's all descriptors of people who look like you) but when you're going on and on about how wet you'd get from being choked by a guy without realizing he's actually inches away from you... well, what is he supposed to do??

"christ, you can see his whole bulge in this one," you murmur, biting you lip. "I have never wanted to suck someone off so bad."

Dave lets out a choked noise, which you interpret as more playful disgust over your thirsting.

"I'm serious!" you exclaim. "I swear to god, he could keep me barefoot and pregnant and I'd thank him."

Dave's hips have started moving faster on their own as he grinds against his mattress. he knows he shouldn't prod for more details of what you'd do to kickass - to him - he knows you're his best friend and that you'd probably think he was some sick freak if you knew the truth, that he's kickass and he's getting off to you listening to you talk about him like that. Dave loves you, he respects you and admires you and cherishes your friendship so much, so why is feeling guilty and conflicted about about listening to you unintentionally dirty talk like this making it feel so good??

"literally, I would make sure his balls were always empty. like, always." you state.

each word that tumbles out of your mouth makes his blood burn with lust.

"U-uh huh," he chokes out, fighting for his LIFE not to moan in front of you right now.

"just one chance," you sigh, "I just know he's majorly packing. Bet he cums a lot too." you murmur.

you're pouting now. pouting over not being able to taste his cock. the same cock Dave is trying to discreetly jerk off just a few feet away from you. he whines softly, praying you won't notice as you continue to look through photos of him as kickass.

"I don't think I've ever been so down for someone," you whine, throwing your head back and sighing. "okay, you can't tell anyone about this-"

you start seriously.

"but I literally got off thinking about him last night, and I came so hard-"

and if that's not the straw that breaks the camel's back. Dave lets out a strangled, stifled whining moan as his hips rut and stutter against his mattress. his head swims as he cums in his pants, blinded by a raw, pure pleasure.

"O-oh god!" he pants, head spinning as he comes down from his high. his cheeks are flushed, and he can't fucking believe he just did that in front of you. he swallows thickly, terrified - and for some reason, a little thrilled by how you'll react.

you look over at him, eyes locked on him for a moment. it only takes you a second to realize what just happened - your horndog best friend got so turned on from listening to you thirst over kickass that he actually creamed his pants.

"You're so gross," you laugh playfully, throwing a pen at him. "I hope you know how lucky you are that I'm great at keeping secrets." you finish, an unspoken promise that tonight will stay between the two of you.

you turn back to what you're doing, unperturbed by the fact that your best friend just came in his pants from hearing you talk like that, chalking it up to Dave being Dave. this isn't the first time he's gotten hard at an awkward time, but usually he just sneaks off to the bathroom or something to take care of it himself. you had a hunch he might resort to something like this eventually, so you're not too surprised.

"Anyway, what do you think his type is?" you ask, swiveling around Dave's desk chair to look at him. your arms are crossed on the back of the chair, and you lean down on them as you look at him.

"Like, from an objective, guy perspective?"

"U-uh," Dave starts with a soft, nervous laugh, still unable to believe that just happened. "I- I don't know..." he shrugs.

he thinks that's the first time he's lied to you. he knows exactly what kickass's type is, because he's looking right at you.

[sunsetcdiscs]

Grr.. i love discussions about the normalization of bad things for teenagers/ kids, whether it be fictional or real. Esp as someone who has had that happen 2 me

And i think it's smth that's very prevalent in ctommy's story.

C!tommy is chaotic on his own, so in a way he already had violence somewhat normalized? And I think all these little things add up to how he later treats his relationships w others, and specifically what actions he's willing to let others get away with.

There are, ofc, Loads of things that later normalize violence even more (wars, all the conflicts in general). But in my opinion, one of the biggest things that normalizes violence that is Specifically Towards c!tommy, was the fight in the pit w c!techno. C!techno beat c!tommy to a pulp, all the while c!wilbur was cheering and egging him on in the back.

Then ofc exile rolls around, and c!dream literally hits him w an axe right in the first vod. But that's okay, it's not like violence is Unusual, right? He goes through that week not questioning every time c!dream hits him, only questioning why he has to give up his stuff (<- this is smth that's never really talked about when ppl discuss ctommy's sentimentality for objects ? When rewatching the exile vods, i genuinely don't think there was a moment where ctommy went "hey, why are u hitting me?" it was always just "hey, why are u taking the stuff that I worked hard for?").

And then he runs away but ends up living with Mr. " ''minor'' terrorism". Can you see how that really wouldn't be good for c!tommy? Then when they go to l'manburg, it Allll piles up and c!tommy ends up hurting c!fundy and c!connor.

I've seen ppl before say that they ignore this lore moment bc it doesn't make sense, but to me it makes So much sense? Ofc a teenager who is constantly and consistently surrounded by a violent environment/people is going to be influenced by it? Ntm ppl say that they love c!tommy bc he's an imperfect character, and is this not a big part of what makes him imperfect?

One of the biggest reasons Why c!tommy left c!techno was because he realized it was further normalizing violence. Because he realized that He didn't want to be violent anymore

("Techno, if this is what I've become, then I don't wanna be me anymore, man."

"I'm worse than everyone I've hated- I'm worse than everyone I didn't wanna be *looks at cdream*").

C!tommy's talk with c!connor at the end of the community house destruction stream will always be So important to me

("For what it's worth, Tommy, I don't know what went on today, but- Even though you kidnapped me and I'm still kinda dealing with a bit of the trauma, I think that at the end of the day; you're just a conflicted person, not a bad person." SCREAMING VRYING THEOING UPP)

And a convo that's even More important to me, is the one w c!sapnap near the start of the doomsday stream, where c!tommy acknowledges that what he did was Bad, and that it was because of influence from the environment around him

("Sapnap, I'm so sorry, that you did that, and that I made you do that because.. it wasn't right of me. And I-I shouldn't... I shouldn't take out.. ANY of the fucked up shit thats happened to me o- on other people, and I'm sorry." AUGHHHHHHH CTOMNYYY VTOMYYY AJAN)

[pseudowho]

Random question, during any of your pregnancy’s were you ever insecure about you body, how you were acting, or any of your cravings?

Me and my fiancé were talking about plans for future kids and i’m to scared to ask anyone else. could you give me a small run through of things to expect?

Thank you so much!!

Hey! I'll answer this both as a woman who has done pregnancy and birth three times, and as an experienced midwife. I don't like the 'horror story' sharing that many women do around pregnancy; it muddies the waters, and is supremely anxiety-inducing for anyone who is pregnant while hearing it.

You need to know I could write, and have written, essays on this.

As a midwife: Pregnancy is this period of unique physiological change in your body and mind, that even when it is normal (i.e. normal symptoms, not a sign of an unwell pregnancy) can be profound and lifelong.

These normal symptoms, including but not limited to nausea and vomiting (commonly referred to as morning sickness, though present at any time of day), weight gain, swelling, congestion, mood changes, appetite changes, stretch marks, heartburn and hip/joint pain, can range from barely present/absent, to severe.

Even severe pregnancy symptoms aren't always considered abnormal unless they're making you unwell (i.e. unable to keep any food or water down).

These symptoms can be altered by many of your pre-existing conditions; your weight and general health, your lifestyle and eating habits, your exercise habits, simple dumb luck/genetics, family history, mental health and body image/dysmorphia, etc.

So in that respect, in a normal pregnancy, I have seen some women who are extremely insecure and struggling to cope with the changes to their body and mind, and some women who absolutely breeze through it like pregnancy hasn't even affected them. Nowhere on this spectrum does it ever surprise me.

So now I'll talk about the average first pregnancy. As I said...the experience varies wildly.

Early on in your pregnancy (up to about 12 weeks) often feels like you're in an utter no-man's land. You feel like healthcare professionals aren't wildly interested in you; they'll take your history and 'book' your pregnancy in from (now this is based on the UK) about 8 weeks pregnancy (please note, your 'weeks of pregnancy' aren't calculated from the moment you fall pregnant, it is calculated from the first day of your last period, so in a woman with a regular 28-30 day cycle, there usually feels like there's a 'disparity' of about 2 weeks in your dates-- there isn't, this is how we calculate it). You may have an early scan or two. Essentially, we wait to see if the pregnancy is continuing; lots of miscarriages happen in the first 8 weeks. About 1/3 of pregnancies will miscarry here, in fact.

Tiredness is real at this stage. You may feel like you want to sleep constantly. It's shit that at this stage you often feel the worst, but feel like you're also just being expected to 'get on with it'. Please ask for help. If your partner isn't an equal partner pre-pregnancy, best of luck to you. You may feel utterly useless sometimes days from exhaustion, and this is normal I'm afraid.

Mid pregnancy drags, but you're usually starting to feel a bit better. The top of your uterus doesn't even begin to rise out of your pelvic brim until about 16 weeks, and the lower part of the uterus only begins to expand and form (creating that 'pregnant' belly look) from about 28 weeks, so don't try to force a bo that simply isn't there. Lots of women are very keen to look pregnant. Just chill. It's okay if you dont. Take it easy. You do not need to eat for two; your pregnancy uses your intake more effectively when you're pregnant. Do take pregnancy specific multivitamins though. They don't need to be expensive or fancy ones; normal store bought are generally just the same, without all the fancy packaging.

Later pregnancy, you will likely notice that tiredness creeping in again. This is where your baby is largely formed structurally, and is maturing and gaining size and weight. Please ignore any and all comments from people who look at you and announce that you will have a big/small baby. They're idiots and likely wrong. Laugh it off. Here is where you may start to notice things like heartburn, hip pain, mood changes coming back again. You're heavy, and it's harder to move, and your organs are moving out of the way to facilitate a baby. Cut yourself some slack if at all possible.

So...now to me and what I had.

As Haitch: (tw/cw: suicidal ideations) So it's now a running joke, that my body was so 'good' at pregnancy, so utterly flooded with hormones, that while I became this perfect machine for growing and birthing babies, pregnancy broke me.

I spent every waking minute of the first 16 weeks nauseous and exhausted, bone deep exhausted. I had all the usual symptoms hit hard and early! I suffered severe pelvic separation, agonising pain, and @mrhaitch had to help me up from an early stage.

Thankfully, he was exquisite pregnancy support. Full is based on him, after all.

I ended up on some pretty strong medication for my heartburn, as it was severe enough that my stomach acid was damaging my vocal chords.

Worst of all was my mental health. From 26-28 weeks, your progesterone levels boom. This is normal. But this is where we discovered that progesterone is a very bad hormone for me. I developed severe antenatal depression and anxiety, and antenatal psychosis. I was paranoid, delusional, fragile and had active suicidal ideations. I had plans on how I would end my life. This is all utterly unlike me.

With my first pregnancy, our son was born at 42 weeks after a fast, normal labour, but I don't know how I didn't end my own life towards the end of my pregnancy. With my second two, we were more on it, and my lovely colleagues induced my labours from 38 weeks, purely because my mental health was so bad.

I was watched like a hawk in pregnancy 3. We knew I would lose my mind...and sadly, I did. I was medicated but It did little to help. It was at that point (October/November 2024) that I began writing on Tumblr...and here I am.

So as I have said...lots of things you could expect.

To this day in my 13 year Midwifery career, I have seen fewer than 10 women whose mental health was affected as badly my pregnancy as mine was.

Phew. If you have any more specific questions, I would be happy to answer.

Love,

-- Haitch xxx

[sleepynegress]

Trying to make a point about good things someone has done who has been AWFUL in other ways, in order to normalize those good things is damn near impossible, nowadays.

Because of this trend to constantly look to pick apart the bad. I just saw a post on twitter that was praising Christopher Reeves and his transformation from Clark to Superman, via his physical acting and this person basically said... "sure, but he was gaslighing lois the whole time." I want to shout from the rooftops that this isn't normal and that the worst people in the world take advantage of this faux moral nit-picking.

[presdestigatto]

just saw someone call charles' career 'common successes' the pole to win ratio agenda is too severe because in no way is 26 poles without a championship winning car common at ALL

every time he wins it's after ten thousand trials and tribulations and his wins this year mean so much more to me than if he had a dominant car. i said it last year and i think so doubly now that he impresses me with every race like he is him and i truly think he is the best.

[imthursdaysyme]

I think Itd be funny if Steve accidentally became obsessed with puzzles but won't admit it the same way dads watch shows by standing off to the side. robin has them out and he complains but she finds him 2hrs later still standing doing puzzles and he's like a caught raccoon

[majimasleftasscheek]

So if Kiryu is a kraken, what does that make Nishki?

I got a lil comic to post later on this but I decided on a mako shark 👀 90% because I like makos 10% because they're fast and pointy and give me the sorta vibe I feel whenever I see him engage rude boy mode. idk if that makes sense when I say it but I feel it in my gut

[rook2ii]

Actually, you know what. I take back any judgement I ever had about the shipname "corn yaoi," because I noticed someone else call the same ship "cornstar," and I went to the tag on Tumblr and-

[lewis-winters]

we, as a fandom, are honestly missing out on the absolute hilarity and angst potential of putting kitty grogan on the front line with harry welsh.

can you imagine the bickering?

[daz4i]

how many times do we gotta go over it man. thought crime isn't real. it's okay to feel whatever you're feeling. don't let anyone make you feel guilty for having some reflex reaction to stimuli in a way that is out of your control. the question isn't what you think or how you feel, but what you do. do you act upon those thoughts? do you harm others bc of your feelings? that's where you draw the line. keep it in your brain. vent it out in some personal way like a journal or a password locked blog. it's okay i promise