#but idk if i have the patience or energy to run a blog for every oc i want to write. even if i just used blogs as i had muse.
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shdwtouch Ā· 8 months ago
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once again tossing around the idea of making a multi for my original characters. I'm just. hesitant. and feel anxious when I start to really think about it. worry it'll fail. worry people won't want to interact with my ocs. worry I won't have enough muse or motivation for it. worry some muses will fall to the wayside. :c it's a hard line to walk.
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hearthandheathenry Ā· 8 months ago
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so Iā€™m not sure if this is a sort of ask youā€™d be able to help with.
Iā€™m very much a believer in mundane before magic. Things like do I have a headache from the lights or is the energy bad in a room? yknow
Anyway- in my head I know itā€™s silly, and that itā€™s just my hormones from being on my period- but a part of me thinks thatā€™s it a bit of an interesting coincidence that the peak of my period was on the solar eclipse. This month Iā€™m a few weeks off than regular and it sucked wayyy worse than usual. I was running hot all day and the eclipse was awesome but at night I had a bad fever. I was feeling my emotions worse than normal.
And- again hereā€™s the part that I doubt the most/ think itā€™s probably just my brain making it up- I cannot for the life of me stop dreaming and daydreaming and thinking about this person Iā€™ve not seen before. Now Iā€™m no stranger to dabbling in more casual manifestation and attraction of friends and good opportunities. Iā€™ve prayed to different gods or left offerings while asking for a friend or someone who could be a partner. The god Iā€™ve been recently making offerings for and researching is a lesser known one from antiquity. Very much fertility and weather- I wonder if now my periods will just be worse since starting my worship lol.
In the back of my head I sorta wanted to do something on the eclipse anyway. Itā€™s not a specific person, but I canā€™t stop thinking about this gorgeous person. It started when my period started but itā€™s continued after it. Again this is where I doubt the most since duh I just keep thinking about my ideal guy etc, but, I also had some weird dreams, a lot of imagery of Set from kemetism and birds and this person all jumbled together. Plus while out and about I saw a lot more Egyptian imagery and birds and romantic symbols and shit. Itā€™s just in the very back of my head that Iā€™m thinking maybe my past manifesting/spell work efforts are gonna pay off. Or maybe even someone is doing something and attracting an energy and I happen to be more sensitive to it. Idk just weird coincidences that have been irking me.
Sorry if this ended up being a weird ramble but I really wanted to write out how I was feeling and thought fuck it might as well send in an ask since I never really have much to say.
feel free to not respond if u donā€™t wanna šŸ‘
also props to ur blog itā€™s very informative much luv :)
I didn't realize I received an ask, so sorry for the delay and thank you for your patience! I'm always happy to chat or give my 2 cents about anything!
First, I absolutely believe the eclipse can affect your period, so no worries there and it's not crazy or anything. Our menstrual cycles are based on the lunar calendar, every 28 days or so (some are just slightly longer or shorter, but the average is 28 days) and if the moon can affect the tides so completely, it absolutely can affect us humans who are 1 made up of a bunch of water ourselves and 2 are also energetic beings that can be sensitive to magnetic changes like any other being. There's some really cool research videos from NASA showing the magnetic fields around earth moving with the eclipse, feel free to check them out! Everything around us, especially large things with massive energy like the sun or moon, can absolutely affect our bodies! I'm not sure if you were in the path of the eclipse at all, but I'm in northern Illinois and we were at about 93% totality by me and even with that, you could absolutely feel it whether you were inside or not. My husband, child, and I all got huge bursts of energy and it was very overwhelming. My husband described it as an anxious feeling as he's not yet super in touch with his bodily feelings and energy and didn't enjoy the experience, but I could tell for me it felt very neutral but overwhelming, so I leaned into it and used to get excited and get things done. It was again though, very overwhelming, which is why a lot of people don't enjoy eclipses or claim they're chaotic energy. A huge burst of energy will always feel weird! Everyone around us and anyone who we spoke to absolutely felt the same. SO, in conclusion, absolutely could your menstrual cycle be affected.
Now, in regards to the imagery you've been experiencing and you looking into kemetism, I did a little digging myself since I'm not super familiar with kemetism and I found some pretty interesting things! I started off researching the God Set(Seth) since you mentioned him, and noticed the egyptianmuseum.org had mentionrd him being associated with eclipses, not just storms and such, but even more than that he had a long-standing tiff with the God Horus the Younger who ultimately bested him and took over his late-fathers throne. Horus the Younger was represented by a falcon and associated with healing, protection, the sun, and the sky. I'm not sure if this is the God you were making offerings to, but perhaps he is the one answering your calling and you are getting glimpses into a little about him and his journey to steer you towards recognizing who is answering you. They do say that if we focus on something we want, we begin to see it everywhere, even if we don't want to, but also many spiritual people who reach out to their Gods and Goddesses report seeing representstions and messages from them before they realize who is trying to communicate with them. So, perhaps Horus the Younger is the one trying to make contact with you. Or, if you've been manifesting a good partner for yourself, perhaps the man you've been seeing is closely tied with Horus or perhaps follows him spiritually. Or maybe he even just embodies the good characteristics of the God and your brain is choosing to represent him in this imagery. There's a lot of "what ifs" from an outside perspective, and only you will know what rings true to you and your situation. Hopefully some of my ideas and such will spark some clarity on your situation and you will figure out what messages you're receiving from the universe to continue on the path you want to lead. I definitely implore you to open your heart to the messages and synchronicities that appear to you in your life, as our guides are always walking along side us in our journey and the universe whole heartedly supports you in every decision you make. Not everything is a sign, but if it feels like it is, then it probably is. Learn to trust your gut and lead with instinct and be open to the energy around you, and just use your brain to keep you in check from becoming too far gone so that you can still be safe within your reality, instead of held back by anxiety or worry about simply being weird.
On another side note, just with the period and everything, I personally implore you to also maybe use this as a sign to learn more about your menstrual cycle if you've been working with fertility gods and your cycle was suddenly changed by the eclipse! There is so much us women aren't taught and we usually find out ourselves as adults doing research. Understanding the phases of our cycle, what's going on in our body and with our hormones, etc are all things that can lead us to better health, better periods, and a better understanding of ourselves biologically AND spiritually (you'd be amazed at how much power a woman holds thanks to her cycle). There's also so many cool unexplainable things that happen in regards to a woman's body and our ability to create! Did you know at the moment of conception when a sperm meets an egg that there's a flash of light scientists can't explain? Did you know that breastmilk is so complex and tailored to each baby and feeding that we can't reproduce it in a lab? Did you know that your energy levels directly follow your menstrual cycle and affect everything you do from weightlifting or exercise to needing to eat more or less to needing more or less sleep? Theres so much knowledge we've lost that women are now reclaiming and teaching and I love every part of it. I think every woman (and man tbh) should go on a journey of learning about their own fertility cycles and such.
Hopefully this was at least a little bit helpful for you! Best of luck on your journey!
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parachutingkitten Ā· 4 years ago
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Season 5 Analysis
STANDARD DISCLAIMER: I am going to be applying the concept of criticism to a TV show you presumably love and adore as much as I do. If you do not want your idea that the show is immaculate to be challenged, I would not advise reading past this point.
Additional Disclaimer: This includes criticism of Nyaā€™s arc, so if youā€™re the type of person to get catty about this subject, turn back now.
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Mood for this season: Itā€™s spoopy time.
You donā€™t need to, but if you are interested, and havenā€™t seen my analysis of past seasons, you can find those here:
PilotĀ -Ā Season 1Ā -Ā Season 2Ā -Ā Season 3Ā -Ā Season 4
You can also find all of these, and future installments, on my blog using the tag #analysisĀ 
Hey everyone! Iā€™m still doing these things! Letā€™s see, when was my last one? Over two years ago...? Yikes, I owe yā€™all an apology. I really didnā€™t mean to put these off that long. Anyway, get ready to hate me, cuz although (for the most part) this seems to be the fandom favorite seasonā€¦ I think itā€™s overhyped. I know, donā€™t kill me. Iā€™ll explain myself. I donā€™t think itā€™s bad or anything, itā€™s very well structured, but I definitely wouldnā€™t rank it among my favorites. First, for a little context, I am making a one second of every ninjago episode video right now, so Iā€™ve been binging the series and all itā€™s shorts back to back, so I think Iā€™ll have a bit more to say about connective tissue between seasons, and hopefully you guys can look forward to more of these analyses between now and the new year when Iā€™m releasing that video. Iā€™m also officially a film major now soā€¦ sorry if I come of as extra pretentious or get too deep. Anyway, letā€™s jump into the thick of it, shall we?Ā 
Plot
This is probably the area I have the fewest number of complaints about. This season has a breakneck pace and it keeps everyone busy. I think thatā€™s why people like it. Everyoneā€™s favorite has something to do. Which brings me to the questionā€¦ which ninjaā€™s season is this? Lloyd is on a lot of the promotional stuff, but heā€™s possessed and out of the picture for over half the season, so that canā€™t be right. Cole turns into a ghost, and the season is a ghost season, but that canā€™t be right cuz I donā€™t know that Iā€™ve ever heard anyone claim it was his. Nya reaches her true potential, maybe itā€™s hers? Well, she does have a large b-plot, but she is consistently not a part of the a-plot. Kai has a whole thing with being protective of Lloyd, he has his fear of water, maybe itā€™s just another Kai season? Thing is, itā€™s no oneā€™s. It is an ensemble season, and I think thatā€™s a healthy thing for ninjago to keep doing. The more we label certain seasons for certain ninja, the more complaining weā€™ll get about whoā€™s turn it is for screen time that weā€™ll miss out on telling a good story. Also, If the season is focused on a ninja you donā€™t like, you are less likely to like the season (see my next analysis for that can of worms). Again, this season tells itā€™s story really well. Morro directly ties into the ending of last season, and Nyaā€™s getting water powers was foreshadowed the season before. Thatā€™s some cool connective tissue to start. The opening episode establishes the three different things the ninja will be looking for, and for once theyā€™re actual tools instead of a series of weapons, blades, masks, whatever. I like that. Jay has some really good humor, Zane has his speech changes, Kai has his irrational fears and protective instincts, Cole has his ghost angst, Lloyd has to deal with his fatherā€™s passing, Nya is a new water ninja, Wu has a shop to run and a student to reconnect with, even Ronin has an arc about developing morals and gaining friends. Thereā€™s the mystery about how to deal with the ghosts, what the rules are, thereā€™s the leader subplot, the ninjaā€™s money situation, and lore of the different realms, they even worked in Skylor and Borg, thereā€™s a lot of cool stuff going on. This is a tightly woven script that manages to include a lot of new concepts that you get pretty quick. I donā€™t feel like thereā€™s even that much fat to cut. The opening is a little slow and strange, and the cloud kingdom episode feels a little unnecessary, but I do like the idea of visiting a different realm early in the season so the audience isnā€™t caught off guard in the climax. Again, the plot all works for me, itā€™s the other stuff I find myself pretty meh on.
Characters
Ronin
Iā€™m pretty sure Ronin is the only new (non villain) character introduced. I like him a lot. Ninjago needed a true wildcard to shake things up and be unpredictable. I also think heā€™s pretty nicely woven into the action of the plot. I think his introduction is a bit strange. Like, the ninja already know him, but weā€™ve never seen him before? Just the way they talk about him sounds like theyā€™re quickly recapping who this guy is for those who missed previous episodes. Itā€™s fine if the ninja already know him but either 1) Introduce or foreshadow him a season earlier or 2) Introduce their dynamic to the audience before it becomes plot relevant. Maybe the ninja are grumbling about him being a nuisance while tea shenanigans are going on or something. Or maybe you have a scene of him stealing the scroll and making snarky remarks about the ninja while he does it. Idk. just something so his sudden plot relevance isnā€™t out of nowhere. Also, I donā€™t hate his and Nyaā€™s dynamic, but I know a lot of people love it, and Iā€™m just not totally here for it. Is he supposed to be a father figure for her? Mentor? Frienemy? Just plain friend? (love interest???) itā€™s not super clear and I could have used some clarification. I also like his use and tie to the next season, so overall, well integrated character.
Nya
Iā€™m adding in Nya here cuz she goes through a major character change, and how sheā€™s handled is one of the things that rubs me the wrong way about the season. A lot of people will probably disagree and/or hate me for this section of the analysis soā€¦ here we go! The thing she has to get past to reach her true potential is fear of failure (supposedly) and the solution to that is to justā€¦ not care as much? First of all, I know this isnā€™t supper important, but the fun thing about the ninjago elements is that every elemental master matched up personality wise with their element. Jay is the energetic master of lightning, Kai is the hothead master of fire, Zane is the calm and calculating master of ice, Cole is the strong and dependable master of earth, Lloyd is the literal child master of energy. This especially goes for all the new season 4 masters. So what qualities are often associated with water personalities? Well, serenity, control, flexibility, elegance, patienceā€¦ calm. You know, like a Zane type character (the element directly adjacent to hers). These are things that Nya isnā€™t - or at the very least donā€™t define her. (thereā€™s also something to be said about water and its ties to more feminine qualities, which Nya has been actively shown to reject, but I wonā€™t go into that rant here.) She was designed as the fire masterā€™s sister, and when you try to fit a fire personality into a water shaped character moldā€¦ it doesnā€™t exactly mesh well. It doesnā€™t make sense. But, like I said, whatever. Maybe thatā€™s the point? Like she has to change her personality to be more in tune with water? Sure. But letā€™s talk about this fear of failure thing. Because thatā€™s the stated thing that dialogue tells us she needs to overcome. But when has Nya ever been afraid of failure? Fear of failure means avoiding doing something because of fear. Nya is ridiculously persistent, always has been (you know, fire personality). She tries training when no one tells her to, she makes her own alter ego to try and be a hero and save the people who would constantly tell her she wasnā€™t ready. Wu says she only wants things that come easy, but thatā€™s never been her character before now, she has carried the team with her tech, research, and covert ops that no one forced her to do, all things which are not easy. Fear of failure is usually characterized by what if questions. If Nya is so afraid of failure, why donā€™t we hear her saying stuff like ā€œbut what if Iā€™m not strong enough, what if I canā€™t save them in time, or worse, what if I lose control of my power and end up hurting people?ā€ Cole shows much more of a fear of failure this season surrounding his insecurity about being a ghost. He wants to sit out from missions because heā€™s not sure heā€™ll be able to do it - heā€™s afraid of failure. But whatever, the writing isnā€™t clear at expressing her true setbacks, but she does display a real problem that a lot of people have and I think could have been well done if set up correctly. She shows an undying persistence that gets her too close, and makes her increasingly incapable. She lets her frustration hinder her progress (again, fire personality trait), and I think thatā€™s interesting because I donā€™t think ninjago has done this character arc yet. The supposed solution to this problem is that she just needs toā€¦ care less? And yes, I kind of see where they were going with this, we sometimes cloud our natural potential by thinking about it too much, but saying ā€œyou need to stop caringā€ is the absolute wrong way to word it. Caring is not her problem, the problem is her control over the emotions that come from her caring. Caring is a good thing, and teaching kids that if youā€™re ambivalent about your problems, theyā€™ll go away is not a good message. What she needs to do is take a step back. She needs to take a break, stop to think, and look at the big picture instead of hyper focusing on the roadblock directly in front of her. The usual and much better wording of the moral I think they were going for is ā€œstop overthinking thingsā€. Teaching kids to look at a problem from a different angle and give themselves time to cool down is a great thing. And just think of it, in the climax she could have this ah-ha moment where she steps back and looks at the bigger picture - the whole town, surrounded by the ocean - and gets the idea to sink the preeminent into the water, you could even easily tie that back into the bucket exercise, and thatā€™s what triggers her true potential rather than the currentā€¦ Iā€™m honestly not sure what. Random flashbacks and the end of the season approaching quickly. Alternatively, you could tie it more directly into samurai x, and make her struggle with letting go of the past and allowing yourself to give up something good in your life to progress to something better. Anyway, I donā€™t think this was a bad decision long term, she needed to be solidified on the team as a full fledged ninja, I just think this season doesnā€™t handle the transition that well. Anyway, whatever, Iā€™ll be waiting for your hate comments in the notes.
Romance
Umā€¦ thereā€™s none this season? Like thereā€™s a few Wusako moments that are still as weird as they were in season 2, but theyā€™re really not prevalent. Thereā€™s also the Jay seeing the future thing which has some weird implications next season (again, some interesting connective tissue between seasons), but thatā€™s about it. Maybe thatā€™s part of why I donā€™t love this season? Like whereā€™s the pixane? Lol, Iā€™m kidding. But maybe thatā€™s why a lot of people do like it. If you donā€™t like the canon shipsā€¦ this is a nice little safe haven for you. Rare for a majority of the series.
Villains
So Morro is a good ideaā€¦ in theory. I know heā€™s the fandomā€™s favorite edgy boy, but idk I think the brand of angsty teen they ended up with was more of an angsty 13 year old than 17 year old. His voice is really grating and I always want to yell at him to justā€¦ go get some cough drops. Stop throat screaming, use your diaphragm man! Also, everyone goes on about his last minute redemption, but as far as season 5 goes, he has like half a second of a change of heart. Literally, when Wu comes over and heā€™s drowning, heā€™s still being a persistent little idiot like ā€œyou never cared about me nooooo!ā€ and itā€™s only at the last possible second that gives him the crystal, and even that he does it kind of saltily. The preeminent is pretty cool, I like her concept, her design, all that. All the other ghosts are fine I guess. Nothing super memorable out of them, although their aesthetic, especially when thereā€™s a bunch of them swarming around is pretty cool. One last thing was I never understood how Morro ā€œbecoming the green ninjaā€ worked and what exactly it was thatā€¦ did for him? Like he didnā€™t actually get the power of energy, right? I donā€™t remember him using it. Did just him defeating Lloyd make him the green ninja? How does that transfer work? And why did he need it to take over the world or realms or whatever? Like I get that itā€™s supposed to give him more power and what not but idk, it wasnā€™t super clear. Thatā€™s a minor thing though.
Climax
Pretty cool. I like the ATMOSPHERE. Green light is a hard thing to use and justify correctly, but it works really well here, especially with the dark kinda gray blue sky complimenting it. When the preeminent starts walking into the ocean, itā€™s genuinely terrifying, but you understand exactly how it works and why sheā€™s strong enough to do it. Nyaā€™s true potential is again a little out of left field and could have had some better motivation put behind it. Like what is it Nya learned in that instant? To not be afraid to protect people? Sheā€™sā€¦ been doing that. Idk. Iā€™ve hit on that enough for now. Overall, there was good variety. I like the green ninja fake out, I like the realm hopping, I even like the little Garmadon visit and Lloyd getting the robe. I feel like we didnā€™t need a part one and two, you could have had different titles. I mean come on. But hey, now we know, if Pix had only been there, the whole climax would have been wrapped up in like 10 minutes apparently. Pix for the win.
Humor
Really good. Like Iā€™m surprised how much I laughed. Jay wasnā€™t annoying humor, it was good stuff, there were some good running gags, thereā€™s a solid fourth wall joke about who the lead ninja is at the beginning of the season. Overall, I am pretty impressed. My favorite joke was perhaps the bit where Jay is sarcastically positive, the voice acting is just really solid. Then again, thereā€™s also the whole Borg scene where he roasts half the ninja, thatā€™s solid stuff right there. Thereā€™s just some really solid character interaction this season and the humor feels a lot more natural and less forced.
Drama
Okay, weā€™ve got a lot this season. Yā€™all know how I feel about Nyaā€™s arc by now. It does not work for me. Roninā€™s relationship with her is alright, but kind of comes out of nowhere. Roninā€™s solo plot about kinda working for the ghosts works. Coleā€™s ghost angst works for the most part, although I wish he would have actually skipped a mission and then gone in to help save his friends once they canā€™t do it without him. That was probably the most solid drama of the season. The other main thing we have this season is Kaiā€™s wholeā€¦ fear/protective streak. This also doesnā€™t really work for me. Like, I get that Lloyd and Kai are friends and stuff, like his whole true potential was centered around Lloyd. But like, why does it have to be framed so weirdly? Sometimes in trying to make it seem like Kai is protective of him, it seems like the other ninja just likeā€¦ donā€™t care about him? Not all the time, but there are some weird vibes. Also, it doesnā€™t really go anywhere. No one learns anything about themselves from this subplot, nothing comes of it, there isnā€™t really a payoff. Also, Kai has yet another irrational fear, this time of water, which really comes right the hell out of nowhere. They try to explain it away like ā€œOh, Kai feels powerless and so water can get to himā€ but likeā€¦ what? Thatā€™s the exact situation he was in at the end of season 2 and he seemed perfectly content to literally swim across the ocean (which umā€¦ what do you mean the sworn protector of ninjago canā€™t swim?). Where is this coming from?! Again, it doesnā€™t really go anywhere, thereā€™s not a point where he has to learn to confront it or he grows because of it. Itā€™s just pointless stuff added cuz the writers like giving Kai vague trails to try and develop him. The cloud kingdom is kinda cool. That last minute twist about them working with Morro isā€¦ stupid and unnecessary though.Ā 
Spotlight Episode
I really like the Spinjitzu master tomb episode. Some cool riddles, I like the first two rooms a lot. I do think the third room is a bit strange. Like, the clue was ā€œdonā€™t look aheadā€ and the solution was to look beneath them, which is the exact same solution as the previous room. Like, you already have magic ice that shows the future, why not play into that? Donā€™t look ahead could maybe mean donā€™t look to the future, the opposite of that being the past. Maybe they have to draw on their past adventures to solve it somehow? Learning from the past is a good lesson, right? But overall, I really like it. Some real solid humor this episode. This episode has the sarcastic Jay optimism, Kai totally stalling for time, Zane dealing a pretty sick burn on Cole, just a lot of fun stuff. I like it. It just has great energy and nothing feels like itā€™s drawn out for too long.
Misc
The aesthetic this seasonā€¦ can be inconsistent, but the main ghost vibe displayed in the opening theme is really solid and I really like it
Speaking of the opening, Ghost wip is great and the opening in on par with last seasonā€™s (which is my fav) for sure
Ice age referencesā€¦ okay.
Chima referencesā€¦. OKAY...
Okay, but like Deepstone canā€¦ kill ghosts? Or not? Is it just something ghosts can touch? Itā€™s supposed to be like water in weapon form, right? Like thatā€™s how I understood it when they first introduced it. Wouldnā€™t the deepstone bars kill Ghoultar then? And then like, Coleā€™s bike is made of deepstone. He uses it as a weapon. Wouldnā€™t it kill him? It kills other ghosts when they touch it. Howā€¦ how does it work?! I need answers!!!
The captain of the steam boat says theyā€™re going as fast as possible, but later Ronin comes in and cranks it up like twice as fastā€¦ that always bothered me like, why would he lie about that? Who is this captain and why is he so chill about everyoneā€™s lives?! And then later Wu cranks it up yet again, like the ship had slowed down to itā€™s previous speed. What the hell is happening with the controls of this ship???
So pissed that the nasty CGI nightmare cloud monster that chases the ninja is named Nimbus. Totally forgot about that. I have an OC with a cat named Nimbusā€¦ I promise, there is not going to be a stupid twist bout the cat being the monster thing in Mists of Fate. That would be very stupid.
I was all excited that season 13 gave us minecart chases, but I totally forgot season 5 gave us one first. I really like the return to the caves of despair btw, good reuse of a known location.
How many times this season did we do the:Ā 
Kai: Oh, I donā€™t like water, I canā€™t do it uwuĀ  Cole: ...You serious?
Thanks for reading! And if you got this farā€¦ I donā€™t know. I would love to hear your thoughts if you have any! These are just my opinions, so donā€™t think too much of it if you disagree.
-Kitten
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unboundbnha Ā· 5 years ago
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hoooo my god. this is for ME
for me. for godzilla. :ā€™)Ā 
āž¤ rules; make headcanons of you and a character of your choice, be it sfw or nsfw.
Thank you so much for tagging me @spicynessā€‹! Iā€™m gonna SKAJHDSKJ. HHHHH. This is everything? Fuck I just want a purple boyfriend šŸ˜« this will be about Shinsou because I like him a normal amount :-)
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First off, Iā€™m a pain in the ass. My sense of humor is wack (itā€™s basically just ā€˜annoy my friends and loved onesā€™), Iā€™m always fricken TANKING The Mood (because itā€™s funny and I physically cannot resist making a Funny if the opportunityā€™s there), everything turns into a game unless you make me stop wink wonk. Shinsou seems like the type to snort in amusement and roll his eyes at my dumb antics, and I appreciate that! If I could make him legit laugh Iā€™d die happy. (I am also emotionally savvy enough to know when to draw the line though, donā€™t worry. Itā€™s just, man, my idea of fun isĀ ā€˜LETā€™S ROASTĀ ā€˜EMā€™)
I love cats. Iā€™ll lose my whole mind over them. They NEED head kisses. Shinsou also likes cats. He also needs head kisses. Thatā€™s it, thatā€™s the bullet point
Being open and honest and genuine is important to me. I believe most any relationship (friendship or otherwise) can work if youā€™re willing to communicate and empathize with the other person: I would 100% be willing to hear Shinsouā€™s shit, and he seems like heā€™d be a good listener too. Iā€™m also good at logicking things through and he seems like heā€™d appreciate that. Likewise, he seems like heā€™d do the same for me, and as long as we stayed humble and werenā€™t looking to be offended (I donā€™t Do That -- heā€™s a Cancer -- love you, Cancers -- so it might take him a minute to get on the same page, but heā€™s emotionallyĀ smortĀ and cares about me so I think heā€™d be willing to work at it) then we could help each other through emotionally hard stuff with hard truths. Plus, Iā€™m a super honest person: if he was in a relationship with me heā€™d probably be pretty secure in knowing I wouldnā€™t hurt him on purpose. If past shit comes up with him, Iā€™ll talk to him. Talkingā€™s the good shit, yā€™all: utilize patience and empathy and youā€™ll be so well off!
I also battle, with a big fucking sword, a lot with mental health stuff (LMAOOOO WHO DONā€™T!!! YEET). I used to struggle with agoraphobia and still deal with anxiety and depression. On top of that, I have something like chronic fatigue -- Iā€™ve been calling it chronic fatigue because Iā€™m fucking tired, all the time. My top energy levels are like a 35% on a fantastic day. I really like the idea of this boye seeing me melting into a puddle, face down on the carpet, and bein likeĀ ā€œhowā€™s it going down there? you okay?ā€ and the answer being obviouslyĀ no, but him just like. Man I dunno. He seems like the kind of person whoā€™s tired, but who can live with it. I canā€™t! When Iā€™m tired, thatā€™s it babes! I hit a 0% on my battery and Iā€™ll collapse! So I just, hhhh. Donā€™t laugh, but I like to fantasize about him bundling me up and into bed. Thinkinā€™ about Birthday Snoot by my good friend @lord-explosion-bakuā€‹ and melting,Ā okay?? OKAY???? Iā€™m soft, the truthā€™s OUT, FUCK! I want to be taken care of like a sad but pampered cat.
(Please read Birthday Snoot I still cry over it)
Also Iā€™m gross and struggle to shower often enough because itā€™s exhaustingĀ so bein given a gentle bath? oh MAN. Hands softly running through my stupid, terrible hair...asking me about my day and if anything happened that triggered me feeling this bad...just....the tenderness....the gentle affection.....being loved even when Iā€™m at my lowest. Being cared for when I canā€™t do it myself. Thatā€™s a legit fantasy yā€™all. We out here!
I love to SNOOZE. I love being COZY. You bet your sweet bippy Iā€™m gonna sprawl over a couch and take up the whole thing. Shinsouā€™d better be willing to snuggle the fuck up. Iā€™ve got great squish which I personally feel likeā€™s great for cuddling: Iā€™m like warm taffy. How better to gently seep into every crevasse of your Favorite Person while enjoying a cozy cuddle?
Listen, everyone fucks hard with Shinsou calling his S/OĀ ā€˜kittenā€™, and I agree (def have written leetle -- HOO -- leetle scenariosĀ with that nickname because wow) but I get all wibbly with the idea of He calling meĀ ā€˜Angelā€™. A joke at first because, like, guys, Iā€™m really nice. (I know it sounds bad when people say theyā€™re nice and LSDFLKJDF I AM, OKAY. Iā€™ve worked on it. Cultivated the skill of kindness! Being kind isnā€™t easy, and sometimes you just wanna go apeshit, but Iā€™ve worked hard to improve upon myself! Yeet!) But I also just really fucking love being annoying. I simply cannot resist the urge to sneak up behind someone and poke them in the ribs. I rib-poke while in the deep depths of making out too, Iā€™ve tanked the mood a lotĀ so picture my dumb ass Pink Pantherā€™ing behind Shinsou, prepared to be Evil while heā€™s, idk, making breakfast or something, and before I can commit a Rib Crime he uses his hero training and fast reflexes and honed senses and all that good stuff to snatch my wrist and askĀ ā€œwhatā€™re you up to, angel?ā€ the answer is nothing, because heā€™s killed me by being sexy and fast and hero-y, and heā€™s probably actually killed me by startling me into collapsing like a fainting goat
He gets the deep stuff. Unfortunately for everyone and especially myself, Iā€™m a Thinker with a capital T: it never fucking stops. I had an existential crisis for like three years in a row because of course, but I feel like he knows what itā€™s like to get lost in your head. Working each other out of panic attacks because holy jesus the universe sure is fucking huge huh? Weā€™re not even a blip on the radar in the history of existence and weā€™re gonna be dead basically tomorrow aaaand thatā€™s why weā€™d be good for each other, because I feel like we both have coping mechanisms that keep us from spiraling too bad, and we could share them with each other.
I also so fucking admire his drive, but it makes me angry that stupid fucking hero society would discriminate in the first place.Ā 
Oh, yeah, thatā€™s another good point: Iā€™m hella mad about 98% of the time and I work hard to hide it! Because innocent people donā€™t deserve to get yelled at! I feel like Shinsouā€™s smart enough to sense when Iā€™m about to pop and he can be likeĀ ā€œheyyyyy...you wanna talk this out constructively instead of getting into a public brawl?ā€ and Iā€™ll be likeĀ ā€œNO but Iā€™ll do it for you because I love youā€ and then we get pizza.
Because Iā€™m fine and balanced and stuff, I made a quirk for myself if I was in the BNHA-verse, and basically I can get stronger at the expense of higher thinking skills and will turn into a weapon of mass destruction against whatever Iā€™m pointing at (ugh, thatā€™s so sexy. Fuck I wanna be a big spooky buff as shit monster thing), friend or foe, so Shinsou and I would work well in tandem because if I got too rowdy he could use his quirk and get me to calm down! Keep me from accidentally doing a murder! Nice!
Okay this is nsfw so if youā€™re under 18 DONā€™T READ IT. Iā€™LL CALL YOUR PARENTS. GET OFF MY BLOG.Ā 
Relating to the point above, QUIRKPLAY. Mind control me into stuff I want to do but am too awkward to ask for, please and THANK you. Also, Shinsouā€™s a top. Gotta be, and thank god for it because Iā€™m certainly not. Iā€™m not happy about being a fucking bottom, because my first and most powerful personalty trait isĀ ā€˜be as annoying as possible to the people you like; donā€™t let them tell you what to do.ā€™ Canā€™t make it easy on myself, nope. Anyway, I want the appearance of being a top without the responsibility because damn, gotta be like, suave and shit. Gotta plan stuff. I donā€™t like that! I do that enough in real life and I donā€™t like it there, either! But whatever. Iā€™m a brat and I feel betrayed by my coochie for it. But Shinsouā€™s a top and heā€™d tease me for being Fucking Terrible, and suddenly I wouldnā€™t be so mad at my coochie. She has her reasons.
I...like Shinsou for a lot of reasons, but a really big one, for sure, is that I feel like he can communicate about the important stuff. He likes to tease, but he knows when to be serious too. Iā€™m really wack about being close and intimate with people and I have, hhh, special requirements to be able to sleep with them, and I feel like heā€™d both be able to respect AND honor that. Like, run through the rest of the BNHA boys with me here: would Bakugou be able to be completely cool, calm, and collected while still teasing, but knowing where to draw the line? Todorokiā€™s closer maybe, but heā€™s not as people-smart (which is also a big thing for me). Confidence (or at least the appearance of it when itā€™s important), respect, communication, listening and respecting what I ask for even if it seems wack -- Shinsou has that, and god is it attractive.Ā 
Also, mind control.Ā 
Also, his capture weapon.Ā 
Also you know this motherfucker is kinky as shit. Thank the good lord.
Also, sexy-slow makeouts with his long, nimble hands running up my outer thighs to squeeze my waist -- teeth on neck, stolen gasps of breath --Ā 
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I feel bad because all of this, fuckin, WALL of text is pretty muchĀ ā€˜this is what purble boy can do for meā€™ and I donā€™t say a lot Iā€™d do for him, but if I got someone like him Iā€™d go to the end of the earth for them. I may be a perpetually-sleepy bitch, but one of my best -- and worst -- character traits is my unwavering loyalty. Iā€™ll be 110% down to kick anyoneā€™s ass who insults him: he can fight his own battles, but he shouldnā€™tĀ have to over some dumbass with a big mouth and a little brain. Making him smile and laugh, oof, be still my beating heart. Words of encouragement when life gets too much. Genuine thanks for his help, whatever it may be. Hugs, because weā€™re both touch-starved as fuck and he deserves gentleness, dammit. He doesnā€™t seem like his love language is receiving gifts -- more like quality time and words of affirmation? Maybe physical touch? -- but Iā€™d still get him little things that made me think of him, that could help him in his day to day life or maybe just bring a smile to his face. We could rescue each other at social conventions, have dates to the humane society and play with cats. Support each other through our depression days, prove that even having a brain thatā€™s mean to you sometimes doesnā€™t make you unlovable. Man, idk. The whole thingā€™s soft and makes my heart go doki-doki. Hitoshi Shinsou is an extremely good person and god damn Iā€™d want to show him I appreciated him and existing at the same time as him. He deserves love and kindness. He deserves someone to kiss every knuckle of his hand. He deserves hugs in the kitchen and blankets being pulled over his shoulders when he falls asleep at the desk. He deserves only good things, and Iā€™d be honored to give them to him.Ā 
HHHHH.
Okay! If you made it to the end of this, congratulations! You donā€™t actually get anything, but boy oh boy you have a lot of information about ME now! Arenā€™t you delighted? Heh. So! You tag people for this stuff, and Iā€™m gonna tag @lord-explosion-bakuā€‹, @bnhascribblesā€‹, @perpetual-bed-headā€‹, @russianonionā€‹, @weebsinstashā€‹, and last but certainly not least, @usernamekate94ā€‹. Tell me about Monoma, Kate. Tell me.
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ace-entrapta Ā· 7 years ago
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I was tagged by @pureren, thanks!
NICKNAMES: Syd, Ni-ni, Syd-ling
STAR SIGN: Taurus
GENDER:Ā Cis female
MBTI TYPE: ISFJ
HEIGHT: 5'5ā€³ or 5ā€²6ā€³
TIME: 5:10pm
BIRTHDAY: May 8
FAVOURITE BANDS:Ā Fall Out Boy, Arctic Monkeys, MCR, all that emo shit
FAVOURITE SOLO ARTISTS:Ā Norah Jones, Regina Spektor, Melanie Martinez, Alessia Cara (note that really all I do is listen to 1 or 2 songs of an artist and nothing else with few exceptions bc I am a mess)
SONG STUCK IN MY HEAD:Ā I Really Like You by Carly Rae Jepsen because the supermarket I regularly go to always plays it itā€™s ridiculous
LAST MOVIE I WATCHED: I think it was Rogue One? it was p good (I watched it at my auntā€™s house on tv, literally the first Star Wars movie Iā€™ve seen oops)
LAST SHOW I WATCHED: Camp Camp
OTHER BLOGS:Ā @kags-kun is my main mostly for that anime crap and thatā€™s it bcs I have no energy or patience to run more blogs
WHEN I CREATED MY BLOG:Ā January, like a week or so before s2 was released
WHAT I POST ABOUT: voltron, and very occasionally me being sad, anxious, and a fool
LAST THING I GOOGLED: hp 3545 driver
FOLLOWING: 636, I have several interests and I always feel compelled to follow every artist ever cuz theyā€™re all so talented man
FOLLOWERS: 1023
FAVOURITE COLOUR: blue, green, and purple shades <3
AVERAGE HOURS OF SLEEP: 7-8 or like 3 no in between
LUCKY NUMBER: 33
INSTRUMENTS:Ā none, though I really want to learn
WHAT Iā€™M WEARING: a black sports bra and red hawaiian shorts (Iā€™m at home)
HOW MANY BLANKETS I SLEEP WITH:Ā 1 big quilt, comf
DREAM JOBS:Ā Idk yet probably something in biology, I wanted to be an astronaut when I was little but now I realise that that requires.....many things........none of which I have
DREAM TRIP: maybe Japan? Iā€™ve only ever traveled once so I donā€™t think about it too much
FAVOURITE FOOD: pancakes. if you hear me actually talking about how I enjoyed eating something itā€™s probably about pancakes
NATIONALITY:Ā Dominican (the english one not the hispanic one, common misconception)
i tag @kcgane @klancerous @keithkoqane @quiiiznak and anyone else who wants to do it, just pretend Iā€™m not a lazy ass whoā€™s too tired to think of ppl to tag lmao
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thegracegatsby Ā· 7 years ago
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this post is all over the place but hereā€™s a super long update if you care lmaoĀ 
SoĀ itā€™s officially been one month since iā€™ve been on this marketing internship in Prague which is basically working a full time marketing job without the pay (duh, Grace) lol I really thought I was going to be filing papers and going on coffee runs, but nope this is the real deal. I didnā€™t even get a day to fix my jetlag nor was I eased into the job. The day after I arrived I had 15 minutes to learn about all the projects everyone was working on, got acquainted with the office and the other interns, then started on all my tasks. To give you an idea of what Iā€™ve been up to, my first week here I had to think of several marketing ideas for a local company and had to present them to the owner. The Stress and nerves had me on bed rest that weekend ngl lol. The owner loved the presentation, but I couldnā€™t help but be so hard on myself. I felt so underprepared I didnā€™t expect to be thrown into the field at full speed. I literally felt like the Mr. Krabs meme. I was shookington. I thought college and a regular part time job was hectic, but wow I was not prepared for job that required 110% of my time and mind. What I mean by that is I was/am technically working on four different projects and each of them need to be unique aka I canā€™t repeat ideas. I learned to trust myself and just trust that if I did my bestā€¦. it would just had to be enough. I can only learn from my mistakes and find a way to improve myself every day. Those ā€œdo one thing to be better than yesterdayā€ quotes were always cute, but they have been extremely relevant this summer. Thatā€™s been such an important lesson and habit. Some other things I was up to is sometimes the company gets invited to special private events so so far Iā€™ve attended two events. The first one being some networking event with a panel so different CEOā€™s discussed the future of tech & marketing and answered questions, then another event where the communications director of Manolo (shoe goals) spoke on the brand. Even got to meet her she was so sweet! Last week I got sent on my first official business trip to Poland to meet with different Korean companies at an expo! I had to basically see and negotiate potential products to market in the US and Latin America. Crazy. I loved every second of it. Iā€™ve been meaning to write for a few weeks now so my thoughts are probably a little all over the place, but now is when I feel like I finally have the time and energy to sit down and catch up on a blog even if no one reads this lmaoo. Itā€™s wild how a month and a half ago I left my job at the bank with a heavy heart and had my summer classes get cancelled/wasnā€™t able to register for any new oneā€™s since they were all full. I was so close to doing nothing all summer except go job hunting again so this trip was such a blessing. Itā€™s super challenging Iā€™m not gonna lie. I feel like Iā€™ve grown so much from being here. Iā€™ve had to get out of my comfort zone in every single sense of the word. Iā€™ve had to depend on myself mentally and emotionally in different ways than Iā€™ve had to back home. I know this sounds super dramatic lol, but honestly this is the first time Iā€™ve been away from my home, family, friends, city, for more than two weeks. Taking such a huge step without my family around has been difficult. Itā€™s how I imagine it would have been like if I moved away for college. Iā€™m going throughĀ ā€œreal life with training wheelsā€ because Iā€™m staying with family here so Iā€™m not 100% on my own, but thatā€™s the farthest thing from perfect. Like.. my extended family is going through some hell shit and I feel like Iā€™m in the middle of it so I canā€™t escape it. I guess thatā€™s where my desperate homesickness comes from. I was SO ready to go home I even asked if I could book a flight after TWO weeks of being here. Thatā€™s how desperate I was to go back home. I never talk about my personal life, but I will say that my actual home life, thankfully, is healthy. No relationship/family is perfect donā€™t get it twisted, but my parents learned from the mistakes of their families/friends and tried very hard to raise my sibling and I in a peaceful home. Donā€™t take this as the ā€œIā€™m the best because my parents donā€™t hate each other canā€™t relate sweetie (: just be happy and drink teaā€ way because thatā€™s not what Iā€™m saying at all lol. Sadly, toxic families are everywhere, but reading/hearing about a household that is going through a nasty divorce with unhealthy drama happening every single day is completely different than actually experiencing/witnessing it with my own two naked eye balls. Especially from my own relative. I know this makes me sound immature or naive or whatever, but I meanā€¦ Iā€™ve never lived anywhere else so I never knew anything other than my own family dynamic ya know? My empathy for children and teenagers who have to go through what Iā€™ve been seeing on a daily basis has grown so much. Again, this isnā€™t a show off way of me saying ā€œmy life is semi-perfectā€ (no oneā€™s is) Iā€™m literally saying the change has helped me understand and appreciate the importance of a healthy home so much whichā€¦ isnā€™t a bad thing. Iā€™d rather learn this now seeing it from afar than with regret later on in my life. Iā€™m genuinely so heartbroken and empathetic for every single person going through this much toxicity especially my own cousin who will have to grow up with the issues her parents are making alone. The biggest takeaway is I know what the fuck NOT to tolerate in relationships. If I thought my tolerance was low, now itā€™s even lower Iā€™m not putting up with any bullshit ever wow. Now none of this would matter if I only got to work then go home and mind my business, but nah itā€™s not like that. An argument happened? Guess who gets some insults and bad attitude. Me. Since why did my extended family think itā€™s okay to disrespect and insult me for everything??? Donā€™t even get me started on the side comments about my weight :)) All I do is try to stay hydrated and mind my business! lmaofdnsfds. I guess thatā€™s where the mental and emotional challenge comes from. Iā€™ve never been a super emotional person literally the last time I cried from emotion was the day of the musical in high school because I messed up on stage and was super embarrassed. That was literally 4 years ago in April. Iā€™ve had like two mental breakdowns already not including the countless times Iā€™ve had to calm myself down, do some breathing exercises, and mentally try to disconnect from the fuckery. The hardest times being when Iā€™m in public. I NEVER talk back tho which is weird because I hardly ever bite my tongue Iā€™m quick to defend myself, but deep down I know the aggression stems from all these problems.. plus I try to tell myself itā€™s not that deep and Iā€™m leaving in less than a month. I know I wonā€™t have to deal with this ever ever again. Also honestly staying quiet gets everyone on my side because people see the way Iā€™m spoken to and are like ā€œwtf ignore it youā€™re doing greatā€. Lol I wish I could go into more detail because there is SO much tea I can spill, but for privacy (and maybe legal idk?) reasons Iā€™m going to stay quiet. Another intern who started seeing the verbal abuse asked me about everything so I confided in her about all the drama and sheā€™s like ā€œwooow everything makes sense things were worse when before you got hereā€ kjndvdf we were super tight it was so great :ā€™) but she left and everything changed when the fire nation attacked. Honestly, everyone I work/have worked with have been so great. I only got close with like two or three tho but still everyone is so nice lol. So yeah even though the work experience here is amazing and something I will value for the rest of my life, the home life aspect is fucked up. Iā€™m even trying to convince my parents to sell this plot to Lifetime lmao itā€™s THAT dramatic. *sigh* Some other news is I was supposed to be in Spain right now. I literally Uberā€™ed myself and my grandmother all the way to the airport yesterday morning, show up to the check-in counter with a smile and bags in hand just so they could tell me ā€œSorry, you donā€™t show up on our systemā€ to my face. Iā€™ve never had an issue with my flight so the room was spinning a lil and was low key panicking because 1. English isnā€™t anyoneā€™s first language here 2. I was abroad and had no idea what to do because I didnā€™t even make the reservation so I had to call two different airlines and try to resolve the MESS, but nothing was resolved they fucked up my booking from the beginning so only my return flight was paid for not the departure :) so after easily deciding I was NOT going to pay $580 for a one-way outbound ticket, I had to quickly figure out my next move.Ā (PRO TIP: ALWAYS BOOK DIRECTLY WITH COMPANIES THEYā€™LL WORK WITH YOU AND REFUND YOU IF SOMETHING GOES WRONG. EVEN IF YOU SEE A CHEAPER PRICE ON ONE OF THOSE TRAVEL SITES SOMEONE TOLD ME THEYā€™LL PRICE MATCH YOU AND EVEN GIVE YOU DIFFERENT FLIGHT ACCOMMODATIONS LIKE CHANGING LAYOVER FLIGHTS ITā€™S MAGICAL). Everyone Iā€™m living with went to Spain the day before, so after bending over backwards to try and get the house key from my grandmother who already passed through security (she couldnā€™t wait for me bc the guy at security had 5 min to wheelchair her to her gate), I found a way to contact her (a blessing bc if not I would have had to stay at a hotel or something) and had her hand me the keys back to our place. I didnā€™t have the patience to take a bus back to the city so I paid the extra fare to Uber back home. The weird part is Iā€™m not even mad. After calling the airlines, contacting my parents, contacting my family already in Spain that I wouldnā€™t be going, I was justā€¦ chilling. Got some groceries and Iā€™ve been living la vida loca just eating and watching netflix lol. Sure, I wanted to go see a new country and even try to see the town my great grandparents were from, but if thereā€™s anything I learned this year isā€¦ everything happens for a reason. I think it would have been an amazing trip, but thereā€™s a reason I didnā€™t get to travel this weekend. Theres a reason I had to leave my job at the bank. Theres a reason Iā€™m here in Prague in the first place. Thereā€™s a reason Iā€™m witnessing this entire Mess. I guess thereā€™s some growth in that too you know what I mean? Younger me would have probably combusted in hatred and be extremely negative and complain that ā€œmy life sucksā€ when in reality itā€™s fine itā€™s just in general, shitty things happenā€¦. but life wonā€™t stop for anybody not even me. On the bright side, some good lessons came out of this experience. Forget 2016, this was the real year of realizing thingsā„¢. Iā€™m going back to Miami with a completely different drive and mindset. For example, I knew school is important and I get good grades, but my attitude towards my education is COMPLETELY different now. Being ā€œgoodā€ just isnā€™t good enough for me anymore. With my grades now I could get into a ā€œgoodā€ grad school, but now I donā€™t even want ā€œgoodā€ I want something better. I want great I want the best I want to work my ass off to get into an AMAZING school. I still donā€™t know everything or even want I want 100%, but this trip has helped me change how I plan to approach/execute my future goals. That ā€œoh I guess Iā€™ll work someday idk thatā€™s a long time from now so I donā€™t care Iā€™ll worry about it another dayā€ wonā€™t cut it anymore. Now that Iā€™m thinking about it, a lot of things need changing when I get back. Which speaking of getting back, Iā€™m counting down the days Iā€™m so excited I leave at the end of the month ayee!! Lol okay I feel like Iā€™m just rambling at this point. There were a few more things I wanted to say buutā€¦ā€¦ā€¦ā€¦ I forgot it so Iā€™ll just end it here and make a new post if I remember lol. Even if no one reads this, future me will and sheā€™ll remember how the Ctrl album from SZA was playing in the background while writing this and probably cringe at how bittersweet this whole experience/year has been.
TLDR I learned a lot on this internship (good and bad) and Iā€™m basically going back home a new person :-)
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