#but i've been rereading a lot of fics
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"There are those frustrated with the results of the Animus project, and the last subject didn't make things any easier. Sorry Mister Miles, but we're not taking any chances this time around."
"This is a strain of the Blacklight Virus, recently obtained from the bright minds of one of our sister companies. Supposedly it's sapient, but it should at least be obedient. Play nice with it, okay?"
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Seconds before disaster struck lmao. The virus was not supposed to be used in this way, and so we'll pretend Abstergo's building was ground zero for the outbreak rather than Penn Station
#Is Mercer based in Italy during his blacklight research?#Does he travel there to see what has become of his virus?#Or are we pretending the Abstergo labs were in NYC the whole time#I usually go with the 3rd one lmao#2nd pic in a row of Desmond restrained#my bad#but with Mercer he at least likes it a little#also sorry for the protocreed spam >.<#ever since that first reverse au sketch I've been thinking about them a lot#prototype#doodles of the art blocked wolf#desmond miles#protocreed#assassins creed#alex mercer#sketches#warren vidic#I need more fics of them#bc I'm about to reread the whole AlexDes tag for like the 1000th time
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shoutout to whatever L and Light had going on in Time Speaks
#and they had A LOT going on#death note#l lawliet#light yagami#death note fanfiction#lawlight#been thinking about rereading it. overwhelmed with emotion simply at the thought#god that fic is so. so.....#if you've read the fic please....... please talk to me#it's a time loop fic it's a fix-it fic it's got angst it's got lore it's got good misa writing it's got domesticity it's got mind games#it has everything like EVERYTHINGGG#I've never been so engaged with death note lore before#the world building is crazy the build-up to the reveal is crazy#almost every character shows up at least once and I cheered every time#if it weren't 400k words long I'd almost say it should be required reading I love it a lot#I know the author is on tumblr I follow them#if they see this hello thank you I owe you everything actually
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sigh feeling nostalgic for my old fics/the old community these days. I miss it man.
#this post is brought to you by the fact that I've been rereading world forgetting the past few days#I've reread parts of it plenty of times#but I haven't actually reread the fic in full... since I wrote it maybe?#does that even count as reading it#it's a fundamentally different experience I think so#anyway I miss having that level of brainrot...#I cringe so much at a lot of the stuff in that fic#but man there were so many great moments#ngl as my 'big fic' i'm most unhappy with I do sometimes think about rewriting some of it#not that theres much of an audience for it anymore#but also that would take too much time and I wouldn't have the patience for it#plus I don't even know how I'd fix it theres so much wrong structurally#it would have to be so much longer which is the opposite of what I'd want for it#I literally am way too busy for that anyway so#ramblings
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As the cabin came into view again, Goldie couldn’t stop thinking about how this had to be the coldest night they’d had in weeks and her feathers were turning into little icicles. With the small amount of sunlight left, she could see her breath on every exhale. It was so cold she was getting exhausted much faster than she should’ve and Goldie knew she’d be sick in the morning...if she made it there at all.
May I present...the Ice Queen of Dawson. ❄️
This has been a long time coming, but I finally finished this set of three drawings last week that I've been wanting to draw for the longest time for @lettheladylead's running in circles (the above drawing specifically comes from chapter 4 - it's the exact moment that Goldie sees the cabin again on the way back from trying to get back to Dawson). (Will also say that these are a very happy belated birthday gift to you! :D)
There were a few moments from the Klondike chapters that weren't necessarily major story moments, but the descriptions of them (and especially of the environments/lighting) caught my eye and my heart, and made me want to highlight the beauty of the Klondike, and so here we are.
For this scene in particular, her walk back to the cabin, I got a very vivid image of it while reading it, a sort of tragic twist on a "winter wonderland" and on Goldie looking all icy-pretty, and the angst of the Ice Queen naturally came in to play.
Will post the other two drawings over the next two days - up next: a king in the morning light.
#DuckTales#Goldie O'Gilt#scroldie#my art#Goldie my love go get some warmth#for real this has been one of the most intense catch-22s of my life#bc I've been wanting to draw these since before we met in nyc carro#but it was a busy time and then last year was also very busy#but it also became a catch-22 of 'do I catch up on tumblr first or reading running in circles first or on drawing for it first' 😅🙃#and that just made me procrastinate all the more and I am very sorry for that#but yeah it finally sorted itself out and so now I can *finally* finish reading it! 😄🥳🤩😍#there's at least one more quick drawing I wanna do during my reread to that point but it should be quick#also shoutout to yourself carro and your in-fic descriptions and your own fic art ✨#they helped me a lot with these drawings ❤️😌#tagging scroldie bc Scrooge put her in this situation and I mean it's them#and shoutout to the Rosa comics for environment references#running in circles
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#polls#tumblr polls#fanfiction#fanfic#archive of our own#ao3#believe it or not this isn't actually for like. me needing to know about hiatuses#this is just a sneaky way of finding out. something else#Danny Phantom#;)#on an unrelated note how do you feel about waiting somewhere between 2-9 months for a fic to continue on its original course?#it's probably closer to 2 if i actually do it#i mean the fic would still be updating but it would be. uh. spoiler alert cant say it'd just be 2~ months til the main storyline continues#i've been given the go ahead from someone who knows about it all but i need to know how people feel about rereading#it wouldnt be rereading but there would be an element of things repeating. it would seem to be repeating at first but isnt#oh my.... wait no.... i think i just realized where i got this idea from & it's killing me how i failed to see this sooner#literally listening to the soundtrack & watching all versions of it bro. i'm an ADHD stereotype#anyway the reason i want to know this is that. this part of the fic can be skipped. you dont NEED to read it#but you would need to wait for the rest of the fic to continue if you choose not to read it#it IS kinda important. it's just. A Lot#okay saying it's skippable but also important seems weird but trust me it's all in the name of beating this kid to the ground#''character development'' no. character deterioration#how can i make him better if he isn't super fucked up#he can't have a mental breakdown if he's happy. & i need him to have a mental breakdown#yeah im going the psychological torture route#also this isnt about timeloops btw. it might sound like it but it's not
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Bottom yakumo fics i rotate thru bc the tag is playing games with me
EIDEN:
(Sequel) "Another Spicy Study Session on Self-Pleasure" by MistressVanya https://archiveofourown.org/works/49270402
"plants should stay in your soup and out of your sex life" by acynthe (locked) https://archiveofourown.org/works/37453975
"surprises" by Anonymous (locked) https://archiveofourown.org/works/48090496
"Pulp Fiction" Chapter 2 by shamelesscooper https://archiveofourown.org/works/60033721/chapters/154533019
KUYA (some dubcon+yaku whump):
ASTER:
QUINCY:
"What Happens in the Woods" by melecs https://archiveofourown.org/works/44134458
"Embers are calling" by Yuuda-cchi (VioletStripes) https://archiveofourown.org/works/49222882
"As I Am, Entirely" by zerenovation https://archiveofourown.org/works/54831790
EDMOND:
"Of Love Confessions and a Horny Snake" by goldgalaxytea https://archiveofourown.org/works/52916077
NOT EXPLICITLY BOTTOM, BUT IT'S NOT... *NOT* BOTTOM (SUBBY +5000pts)
"Magic 101: Lessons in Gem-based Erogenous Zones" by auriadne https://archiveofourown.org/works/37413112
"Day 6: Dom & Sub" by Nya (Yuutfa) (locked) https://archiveofourown.org/works/49106176
"Trick-or-Treat" - Chapter 3 by SnowRelic https://archiveofourown.org/works/50601046/chapters/128881948#workskin
"in good taste" by winterdesu https://archiveofourown.org/works/59208052
#eehehehehe sometimes i just get into moods where bottom yakumo is where it's at#like. specifically bottom yakumo. and/or EXCEPTIONALLY subby yakumo.#no twisting the game to overpowering his partner at the end. that's the bott-to-top yakumo pipeline that fits a DIFFERENT specific mood! :}#eventually i'll exit the bottom mood and dive into topyaku fic and we continue the cycle anew#because... ultimately..... switch yaku is my everything (my agenda and preferences are visible from outer space)#anyway yeah this stuff is all on the hornier side. there are bottom yaku fics that i like that are more plot and char-heavy#but this is the list for when i wanna see him whimpering and begging and crying etc etc you know the post i'm talking about#i started compiling this list because i tried filtering for bottom yakumo and got like. 8 fics#i whispered... i've been living off 8 fics ? Only? i mean that's a lot given how small the fandom is but i feel like i'm missing some#anyway there ended up being more than 8 (that i would reread) so i was quite content with my findings#maybe i'll update it if i see more. hmm. i hope i'll see more#bottom yakumo reading list#i am reading words and acting in ways#nu carnival yakumo
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Wouldn’t want him getting lost now, would we (Patreon)
#Doodles#SCII#ZEX#The Captain#DAX#Me quietly while watching Muppet Treasure Island: Don't | My brain: Haha anyway- ♪#I don't even have to reread! My brain just does this nonsense! It's still Right There at the forefront of my mind#At this rate I'll have to go pick up Treasure Island from the library *shakes fist* Stevensonnnnnnnnnnn#I will admit that the itch to reread has been growing but mmmmn I've got fics to vet for printing! And that one's technically unfinished!#I mean I might break soon lol but mmmmnnnnn!#Same thing when I was in a Treasure Planet mood years(?! how has it been that long and I still haven't rewatched!) ago#Anyway yes these were inspired by rewatching Muppet Treasure Island lol - it's just one interpretation after the other!#If you happen to go seeking out Professional Pirate you might recognize the second shot as when Jim has been kidnapped by the pirates#I kinda just interpolated from there lol#Same vibe as the set I made a while ago of ZEX piercing the Captain - there's just Something So about ZEX leaving a mark on him!#Not directly altering him (at least more than skin-deep haha) but decorating him! Dressing him up! There's Something about that#Like a living museum - how much does ZEX project onto the Captain? There's a lot of weird vibes around them <3#He wants A Human and he has His Human but hmmm ♪#Well for the time being that's his only human - and seeing as he's collared but without a leash in the last one he's not running away!#It's progress haha#Hhhh drawing the Captain in pirate garb really is one of my favourites <3 I had so much fun the first times around and it's still fun!#His hair is for some reason I cannot explain easier to draw in this setting - there is no explanation I can think of but it is! Why fight it#ZEX is also very fun to draw in pirate gear haha ♫ I really think it's one of his handsomest interpretations#I always think he's pretty! But something about the pirate aesthetic adds to his masculinity? :0#He's still a swishy pirate hehe ♥ Maybe it's the open chest on his tunic haha I just think he's very handsome!
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this is so dorky but i think writing that really long succession fic last summer/fall fundamentally fixed me
#i've been rereading it (finally felt brave enough!) and oh man! lots of feelings associated w/ this whole experience!#i got so much out of writing this!!#both in terms of helping to process a lot of life stuff AND a lot of fandom feelings stuff#and in terms of: now i weirdly feel like i can write anything (original fic edition; fanfic still scares me) i ever think of ever again#i somehow feel like making it through that fic to the end means now i've got the power#there are a few chapters in this where it's like 'i managed to write this exactly how i imagined it#and it was so hard it was like running a marathon#but eventually I DID IT#and now nothing scares me'#anyway. i love this fic. thanks for improving me so much @ this writing experience!#and thank you to everyone for leaving such incredible comments because i'm still over here rereading them and living for them <3#dollsome's deep thoughts
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The unusual but no less hard-hitting 10½! (1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9)
So as it turns out, I did so many Blank Slate/Have you lost your mind? doodles that I ComPletely broke the last sketchdump lol, so it gets it’s own! Who could’ve figured that making basically a full comic of Chapters 2 and 3 would’ve made just a few too many sketches lol
Because of that, I’d strongly recommend reading what I've posted of Have you lost your mind? so far before this! Spoilers and author’s notes/behind the scenes warnings and all that haha
Concept sketch for Scriabin - I always love having visual signifiers to denote timeline/AU/etc. differences so you can tell at a glance where you are :) His silhouette gets to be correct! The details, well, sorry we forgot those ♪
And concepts for Edgar! I've drawn him in different glasses before so it was a bit of an excuse, using these new/old glasses to do so again haha
But in the end I went for a reference! Remember when I drew Edgar's glasses tiny?
And I mean, if he hadn't worn them in a while, maybe they're just a bit small on him! Lol
Poor memory-less Edgar's musings, it's not just sad to be forgotten, it's sad to forget :(
Early concept of Scriabin freaking out by himself in the bedroom. I'm glad I got to keep it :D
Always gotta draw 'em reacting to something just out of frame
Poor Scriabin, he wants to be close despite knowing Edgar doesn't remember him. He has to face this whole Being Human thing completely alone! Edgar just doesn't understand!
He doesn't know how good he's got it haha, if I was really mean I'd have let him keep his glasses instead. There's a bunch of fun themes either way, but stealing from Edgar while hiding in his own hair is as good as any hehe <3
Blank-faced Edgar, I ended up with a lot of these, unsurprisingly. Doesn't help that he's cute haha
As usual, starting from the middle - it's just easier to get ideas flowing around a core! Also that note pointing at Edgar of "Put Todd to bed" was all the everything of the prep work I did for writing that little section, but the rest Absolutely Needed storyboarding lol
He might come to resent you if you manhandle so much right after meeting for the "first" time
Scriabin actually touches him in the original draft, but after I thought about it, it'd probably take a bit to cross the touch barrier comfortably again! Scriabin's still weird about Edgar but Edgar is wary, it's an interesting dynamic
I won't show off every panel, but panels like these where I think they turned out especially cute Have to be included haha <3 I dunno what it is but Scriabin pouting always turns out adorable ♥
Floof harder! Edgar's innocent expressions ahh <3
Starting to lay the groundwork, but still a bit nervously! It is quite fun how they skirt each other, not quite sure what the other knows - how many lies can Scriabin get away with before he gets caught!
Scriabin using some informed guesswork in conjunction with what he definitely knows, he is rather intelligent :) You can also see Edgar's unfocused eyes well in this one, I tried to draw them fuzzy behind those glasses hehe
These are all lined up like this on the page :D Really happy with his hand expressions here, and his face haha
This was one of my favourite lines - he keeps making excuses for Nny! Edgar no! - I fully admit that it's also partially influenced by how cute Edgar turned out haha, the poor thing - but he's so wonderfully fluffy!
I love this line as well, Scriabin utterly convinced that all his hard work must have gotten through to Edgar somewhere in there, he said it often enough, he must have listened to him at least once-!
And then Edgar completely cuts him off and redirects him haha, they’re both hopeless <3
So mad at himself and Edgar, comedy = pain + time, but this is still fresh! Give yourself some time!
That last line in particular is so insidious because he did that, Scriabin was the one who put him in that situation, and now he’s trying to turn it back around on him! He's the worst ♪
Guilty Edgar <3 Still pressing on (changing the subject so he doesn't have to linger on the feeling hehe), he does have his own questions
These kinds of exchanges were especially fun to look back on from their individual perspectives since I only drew it once, starting with Edgar. How honest can Scriabin really be? He can't explain everything and not be kicked out for being a potential danger to Todd or Edgar! He's gotta play his cards Just So
Edgar is also quite intelligent! Catching Scriabin out in a lie, even when he's trying so hard to skirt the truth!
Scriabin so mad about being called out, gotta rub it in just a little bit that he's Totally Right lol, what a brat <3
Scriabin is legally and morally and emotionally and spiritually obligated to mess with Edgar sexually in literally every iteration of his existence, it is a core tenant of his being and also he really really wants to (lol) ♪ Drawing Edgar all blushed up is just a bonus, who does this stranger think he is! What has he forgotten! He's not some easy man! Haha, if you only (still) knew, Edgar
Whatever he was going to say would just hurt Scriabin's feelings, better to just cut him off before another reminder gets laid out
Probably my least favourite dialogue that I had to change was making "?" into something that flowed better in just-text, it's not the same! Lots of little notes about word choice actually haha. Love them reaching for each other even like this <3
Edgar has all these feelings to contend with! My favourite shot is easily the last one, Scriabin's relaxed mouth while Edgar's heart is beating out of his veins right into his ear ♥
Pls o////ò;
Existence is exhausting
Even without knowing him, he's just a cautious guy :) And he wants to be gentle with him! He doesn't realize what he's doing, what his actions would mean to Scriabin if he could see them, and he does them all the same 💕
Pretty lad <3
Technically backtracking, to Ch. 3! POV shifts are fun lol
Zarla mentioned Scriabin curling up into a ball in the blankets and I thought it was a cute visual haha ♪ Haven't had a use for it yet but never say never hehe
I wanted to go for some high perspective shots to drive home the uncanny feeling of being really truly alone for the first time ever. That, and he's dramatic anyhow haha
His posing was very important to me! Since Edgar knocks on the door while he's still leaned against it, the contact points would Feel a specific way
Scriabin got a lot of「bracket notes」for his section, usually as digs lol, where does Scriabin get off saying that Edgar has no tact haha
More blank-faced Edgar! These were actually drawn separately - could be chalked up to how each of them remember the event! Edgar sees himself as more put-together and Scriabin as more foolish haha ♪
That horrible sinking feeling
I pick on him a lot but this really would be incredibly scary and sad! He's alone, expelled, and the only person who Knows him now doesn't even recognize him! This was probably the one scene I wanted to be just a bit longer, really feel the weight, hmm
But he's also quite resilient haha, he has to be <3 He has enough tenacity, thank goodness haha
One of those examples of panels basically repeating lol, I can only fit so much text per pose! Plus it's fun to see the little body language differences :)
Another bracket note lol, Scriabin has to be the best at everything!
And another, have I mentioned that Kaggie is my favourite of the two? ✨ I'd still like to give both K and D a more sizeable reference sometime! Scriabin continues to be the cutest when he pouts, agh <3
Touchy touchy touch ♥
I do love the phrase "feeling himself" right after the last panel lol - it can be both literal and metaphorical! And that's what you get for not cleaning up after yourself! I swear that lightswitch panel confused me so many times on reviewing notes lol
He's not even careful pfft. Then again if he was, he wouldn't have a mess to grumble about in the first place!
A familiar face while Scriabin's already feeling small on his lonesome, ~it's symbolic~
Ough, it hurts to think that Edgar might actually be able to watch Zeitgeist, not knowing the deeper implications. The thought of him inviting Scriabin to see it! 💔
The most important question, and he hasn't come to a conclusion yet :) I wonder what his answer will be once he stops hiding from it!
Hhhh this has been a really fun AU to write for, I'm glad that I finally put it to words since it had been rolling around in my head since early 2021 - there are so many fun and insidious things to explore! Especially on Scriabin's side, though I still think it's the most fun to be stuck behind Edgar's eyes, an aware audience knowing what Scriabin is up to while Edgar doesn't hehe ♪ Hopefully I'll have some time to return to it after a bit! :D
#💟#Doodles#Art#Sketchdump#Blank Slate AU#Scriabin#Edgar#Hhhhhhhwhy did I make so many of these lol ♪#I finally utilized the method I'd heard about for fic writing of doodling out scenes for visualization#And then it comes back on me like this! Lol#And this still isn't even all of them!#Cough Patreon plug cough cough cough lol#But most of them are featured here :) I was happy with a lot of them! :D#In general as a fic it's been quite easy-going haha#It feels a little ironic to me but it's my in-between fic - since I'm not rereading it's detail-light/non-specific#I guess I'm just thinking of it as a first draft until I reread haha ♪ I'm just sharing it while I'm here! :)#I think it'd be a fun read-along to find which panels go to which scenes hehe#Although I'm also a big advocate for ''seeing'' fics on your own first!#Sometimes the imagery is different and inspires! I've had several times where I'll read and then draw#And /then/ go look at the accompanying art and it's quite different! Translation through medium! :D#So I always recommend getting your thoughts out first haha you can always return later :)#I know I said so already but having at-a-glance differences to show where we're at ah <3#And that it's to do with both of their glasses! How they see each other but literally! Hehe!#It really is such a fun concept to play in ♪ Similar in some ways to And Also With You#But one-sided! I also really love the trope of ''The one who should know Doesn't''#Oh and did you catch the Loved and Wanted reference? It's subtle haha#Always pulling little things from everywhere >:3c Blink and you miss it fun!#Pls do stick with me if you like it so far :D I have more ideas just you wait ♫
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me: oh i'm sure no one ever rereads any of my fics, ever :) haha why would anyone do that? lmao also me but about other people's fics:
#this is especifically about gallus' hearth god fic#its been over a year since i first read it and im still not sane about it#haunts my every thought (lovingly)#though in general i reread a lot of fics. if it's in my bookmarks i've likely read it more than once
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Speaking of Megaman, someone just left a comment on one of my very old Megaman fics from 2018 saying they printed it out years ago, and when their anxiety doesn't let them sleep, they reread that story and it helps drain the tension out of them.
; ____ ;
#i talk#gay robot hell#I went ''AWWW???'' out loud when I read that#Definitely gonna be one of those comments that sticks with me forever I think#I need to respond to Ao3 messaged I've just been getting my butt kicked by the triple threat called anxiety / depression / adhd#for the past few years#I reread a lot of Ao3 comments when I'm feeling down. My Megaman fic readers always left such nice commenrs#* comments#I miss the community#I miss drawing I miss not being burnt out I miss being able to do more#I miss being happy#But that comment did make me smile a lot#I just got home so I'll have to reply later but I'm gonna be thinking about it all night#all month probably
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what's so weird is that I joined the sw fandom while rebels was airing right? like. by the time I caught up on the movies and tcw, star wars rebels season 3 was about to drop and there were all these hints about obi-wan showing up, so as a brand-new obi-wan fan I was like. HYPED
and I was also like "omg omgomg omgomogmg ewan should come back as obi-wan please it's all i want i'm going through A Lot and him coming back as obi-wan would just really help me get through all the shit i'm going through"
and so yeah obi-wan does show up in rebels which is like :')))))) SUCH A GOOD EPISODE btw and not long after that tcw season 7 was announced so I was like "omg yes even more new obi-wan content! i am thriving!"
and then not long after that the kenobi series was announced and that show made ALL of my dreams come true but now it's like. it's done and I'm so conflicted about whether or not I want a second season (I think I'm leaning more towards I want ewan to come back again but I'm not sure if it should be in the form of a second season, since the series ended on such a perfect note)
but now it's been almost two years since the show and for the first time since I joined the fandom, there's been not much new obi-wan content in tv/movie canon (there are plenty of books and comics though I'm just very behind with my TBR aklsdjfljalsdflafd)
so the fandom just feels different to me y'know? or at least the obi-wan centric part of the fandom feels different. the past few years have been amazing and I really hope we continue to get more obi-wan content in one way or another but I also don't want it to be at the expense of his character. I want it to be right.
but this means less obi-wan content and I'm just trying to come to terms with that :/
TLDR i joined the fandom at a time when a lot was happening with obi-wan's character and now things have settled down after all of that and I'm trying to wrap my head around all of it
#this is long and rambly and doesn't make a lot of sense#but i think this explains my feelings towards sw lately?#i've also been like struggling to find new fic to read so i've been going back and rereading a lot of fic that i remember enjoying a lot#which is nice but as i've said before. fic feels different now than it did a few years ago#and it's no one's fault specifically! the fandom is constantly changing after all#i'm just nostalgic i guess. that's my default setting#anyways i rambled long enough if anyone reads this thanks you're a real one :')#pandora's ramblings
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Ao3 wrapped ask game: 18, 21, 48
Thank you for the ask! This Ao3 ask game is so much fun!
18: Highest word count fic you read this year
At 215,848 words that would be A Christmas Peril by The_Dawn_Knight! This is a very angsty and emotional story about Damian Wayne, Jon Kent, and Billy Batson as they try to deal with boat loads of trauma as well as the many villains that want to hurt them. The interweaving storylines are fantastic and each of the three boys gets significant amounts of time dedicated to their character arcs. It does contain a lot of dark subject matter so be sure to check the tags before reading!
It's still a WIP, so it's sure to keep growing, but it's definitely worth the read!
21: Your total hits this year
As of right now I have had 38,966 hits in 2023!
48: Oldest fic you read this year
That would be Invisible to See by FayJay! This fic was published on Ao3 in 2009 though I believe it was imported to the site so it was actually written in 2002-2003! It is a Harry Potter fic about Draco Malfoy fleeing the Death Eaters and changing sides in the war. It's an Explicit Drarry fic so be aware of that if you decide to check it out.
I read this fic as part of a bookbinding holiday typesetting exchange through Renegade Bindery!
#ask me whatever you want y'all#billy batson#damian wayne#jonathan kent#harry potter#draco malfoy#fanfic ask game#This is a lot of fun to answer#I love looking at all the fics I've read this year#it's been a struggle not to spend all day rereading things
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*said with clenched fists, through gritted teeth* cringing at something i wrote nearly a decade ago is actually a good thing and i am being so strong and brave by reading it without clawing my eyes out
#been in a weird mood lately and got hit with thoughts about finishing [redacted] but rereading it is...testing my soul to say the least#not bc i think it's BAD it's more that i know i could do it better now bc i've improved a lot in the last 8 years#which like...i'm proud of myself!! a lot of the growth is quite literally visible in the fic itself#but i guess this is a lesson in why it's not ideal to leave a fic unfinished for 8 years#chances are nothing's even going to come of this and i doubt anyone's really still actively waiting for updates#and that's not me trying to fish for anything!! i'm just genuinely rereading and having a Time sjavhbsdvhd#the maddie diaries
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as someone who hasn't had tumblr for very long, i keep forgetting that everyone on here is a freak. no normal person has tumblr (including me). i keep forgetting that i can post about my freaky lil gay ships and, as long as they're not illegal, no one will judge me for them. like, i can post about "paragon" and "blue" and "dirty laundry" and "shut up and dance" and people most likely have read them before. this is like the first time in my life that i can be an actual weirdo and no one will judge me for it
(ignore the yapping in the tags i got carried away)
#this is awesome#context:#blue is that one zukka fic where zuko is like a spy or sum shit idk it's been a while#we all know paragon but for the people who don't it's that hannigram au that has a lot of smut and is like gospel to the hannigram fandom#and dirty laundry is that klance fic that is simultaneously both more devastating and much calmer than the actual show#also it hasn't been talked about since like 2017#and finally#shut up and dance is the klance fic im to scared of finishing cause that'll mean that it's over#and it's definitely totally not on an archive that o can just go back and reread anytime i want#holy shit i've found the character limit on tags lol
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having one of those nights where i wanna pick up every fanfic project i've left dormant..........
#late night rambles#penguin in the pages is pretty plotted out-- i could write up to ch 6 or 7 before needing more detailed outlines#i had a post-blackout aunt arctic fic idea for FOREVER where the director/AA dichotomy breaks down and the leads comfort her#PLUS that fic idea could also turn into a 5 + 1 fic#and then i was rereading a certain route bad ending... it's juicy it's dramatic mack is SUCH a bastard#jumping back into the dating sim would take a lot... i've forgotten a lot of coding stuff since i haven't been actively doing it#but i've unintentionally locked most of my fi lore in that game b/c if i spill out here it'll technically be spoilers!!!!#i can't work on any of this tonight tho it's too late...............uwagh
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