#but i’ll be alright i have awesome friends and the best bf ever i’ll be okay yes i’ll be alright

[cybervamp1re]

how i look when i wanna relapse but i’m totally over that but i feel like shit but even if i REAAALLYY wanted to i 1. don’t have a blade ANYWHEREEE and 2. really really don’t wanna relapse

[collecting-stories]

Comfort - JJ Maybank

Request: hi!! i love your fanfic about obx and i was wondering if you could write something where the reader is struggling with her body image/self-confidence and the pogues don't know but JJ, her bf, somehow finds out and comforts her? i haven't been feeling very confident lately and i feel like this would help idk why. thank you <33 - @teaheeee

A/N: This was a tough one but here it is.

Outer Banks Masterlist

✰ ✰ ✰ ✰

“I’ll be like five seconds.” JJ swore, running up the stairs to your room where he’d left his wallet.  

“JJ come on.” You groaned, falling back onto the couch. This was at least the fifth time he’d stalled the two of you from leaving the house. You were supposed to be meeting everyone at the beach and you hated being late.  

“Hold on!” He shouted. He had dropped his wallet under the bed earlier and almost left without it when the two of you were leaving. While you waited downstairs, he grabbed the wallet, pausing when he noticed the ripped picture on the floor. Shredded by hand into pieces was your school picture, the one you’d just gotten last week.  

JJ picked up the pieces, sifting through them for a moment until you called him again, reminding him that the task at hand was getting his wallet so you could get to the Wreck. He didn’t want to bring down the evening and he wasn’t sure what to say so he said nothing when he came down, only holding up his wallet to show you that he found it.

It was entirely possible that he was reading too much into things. That you had really just hated your senior portrait and thought it was awful. There was nothing wrong with that, school pictures were always cheesy. But ripping your picture to shreds wasn’t an isolated incident, not in his mind at least. You’d been avoiding any type of jean or tight all week. He was honestly surprised today to find you wearing a nice dress though he supposed that it was for everyone else’s benefit because you kept holding the hem like it was going to billow up.  

You were fine at lunch. It was JJ that caught Kiara’s attention, seemingly more distant than she remembered seeing him before, she leaned over at one point to ask if everything was okay at home.

“What do you mean?” He asked, gaze straying to you as you pushed at the food on your plate.  

“Are you okay? You seem really distracted.” She replied, keeping her voice down so no one else noticed.  

JJ shook his head, “fine.” He didn’t want to tell Kiara that he was worried about you. If you hadn’t said anything to her, and you clearly hadn’t because she seemed oblivious to your behavior, then he didn’t want to draw attention to you.  

It wasn’t any one thing. You couldn’t pinpoint the moment or the day, it wasn’t that you stepped on a scale and gained a few pounds. It wasn’t that your jeans felt a little too tight around the hips. Though now that you thought of it, you were feeling kind bloated lately. But it wasn’t just that. It was the sudden breakout of acne near your jawline and the way you felt like you just couldn’t quite ‘pull off’ the clothes you were wearing. It was the feeling of something being wrong but not being able to pinpoint it. That unsettling, unnerving feeling of looking in the mirror and knowing that it was all wrong. That you were all wrong. Your hair looked dull and lifeless, your skin was puffy and it didn’t glow the way the serum you bought said it would. You could name something from head to toe, there was list, sprawling inside your head of all the things that were wrong. Your posture, your nose, your waist, your legs, your eyes...everything had something wrong.

JJ waited until you were back at your house, sprawled out on the couch with you while you watched some rerun of a stupid show. Never good at confrontation that wasn’t with someone he didn’t like, JJ jumped right in, “Are you okay?”

It was a simple enough question. You could just say yes and he could be satistfied and everything could go back to normal. You could hope that you would eventually shake the awful feelings and be okay. Or you could tell him that you were just tired or just not feeling well or just whatever. It didn’t matter what you said, there were a million excuses and all you had to do was choose one.  

But that was easier said than done and you found yourself floundering for a moment, trying to think of the most believeable way to say that you were fine and he didn’t have to worry. He had enougn on his plate, he didn’t have to be bothered with you too.  

“Yeah.” You replied, voice a little shakier than you meant it to be and you grimaced slightly at your own voice.  

“Are you sure?”

If he was asking the question than it meant that he probably knew the answer.  

“Yeah, fine, good.” You nodded.  

“I saw you ripped up your picture.” He admitted.  

“I can explain-”

He nodded, “you know you’re awesome?” He asked, as if he was expecting some sort of response from you.  

“Sometimes,” you shrugged, “I don’t know...I just feel like...it’s not worth it. Like I just want to stay in bed and under my covers because then no one has to look at me.”

“Well I like looking at you so I can’t say I’m a fan of that idea,” JJ replied, smiling when bit your bottom lip, “although if the bed’s big enough than that’s fine, we can hide together.”  

“JJ,” you sat up more and so did he, “I’m being serious!”

“So am I,” JJ replied, “you think I’d hesitate to do anything you needed me too? You don’t have to believe me but that doesn’t mean I won’t remind you ever day how incredible you are.”

“You’re such a sap,” you tried to play off his words as if it didn’t make your heart race to hear him say those things to you.  

“Eh,” he shrugged, pulling you against him and kissing the side of your head, “worth it. Now, you wanna tell me what’s the matter, really?”

“I told you.”

“More than that.” He stressed.  

“I just feel gross I guess. I don’t know, it’s not any one thing it’s just like, every little thing that I see that I don’t like. It’s so easy to just...look at myself and see all the ways that I’m falling short. All the things I wish I could change about myself.”

“I don’t know how helpful it is to say it but, I wouldn’t change anything about you.” JJ admitted. “You’re my best friend, I mean...” he shrugged, almost as if he wasn’t entirely sure how to end that sentence. JJ wasn’t the best with words, he had always had trouble getting his thoughts. He could name every single thing that he loved about you, and the list was extensive, but saying the words felt like his throat was closing up on him.

It didn’t really matter though, you knew what he meant. The soft look and the kiss on your forehead that had you closing your eyes when his lips touched your skin. He wasn’t used to comforting, hadn’t ever had any example of it in his own life, but he was good at it. He was good at letting you know it would be alright. Even if he didn’t say it outright.  

-

taglist: @maplelattes22 @poguesrforlife  @freckled-and-daydreaming  @chasefreakinstokes @millie-753 @fangirlwithme @alex12948 @katherine097 @tangledinsparkles @carbonated-beverage @mariofgreengables @damonsalvawhore27 @dopedoodes @dolanfivsosxox @belledutchess @poguelifeeee @faded-blue @parkerpetertingle @thebookwormlife @summer-clouds-and-long-days @jellyfishbeansontoast @minigranger @hoewkeye @love-someone-special @tiredfeels @strangerthanfanfiction713 @the-only-nana @tomzfrog @mozz-are-lla @vindictive-hearts @ssprayberrythings @jenahbell @beautyandthebleh @gothackedalready @teenwaywardasgardian @sarahcxmeron @haha-fuck-you-thot @stillbelieve398-5 @rewindlr @queenniccimicci @kissessforharryyy @thedarkqueenofavalon @alytavzla @bqmblebee @linniep @nerdypartytrashpsychic @xxchxrryxx @spencer-reid-is-a-cutie @danielladreaming @obx-saltlife @youngestxhearts @spnobsessedmemes @wowitswondergurl @mybnkjj @pineappleandcherries @mysterious-adventurer @justawilddreamerchild @rhyetaylor62 @calm-rejects  @oh-annaa @aiifandomsunite @x-lulu @ceruleanjj @wicked-laugh @obxwriterfan @allie-mcginn @literarycharleton @khiaraaa-in-spacee @crushe-s @teamnick @daydreamlilys @collectiveuniverses @activist-af @mdgrdians @buckys-sunflower @vindictive-hearts @copper-boom @talksoprettyjjx @5am-cigarette @smiithys @dontjinx-it @outerbanksbro @mysticsthinking @heavenlymama  @rudy-pankow-needs-an-oscar @babymatilda @raekenliar @lemur46 @under-a-canyon-moon @calums-betch @jolomez @summerkaulitz 

[boltwrites]

hey, i want to pay you a compliment but i don’t want to be weird about it - a guide to interacting with a smut writer

so, recently i got a pretty inappropriate ask and figured this would be something beneficial to share with you all, especially if you’re new to interacting with smut writers or don’t know where the line in. i know it can be kind of intimidating and confusing interacting with smut content when you’re new to it or you’ve never spoken to a writer directly, so i hope this guide can offer you a little bit of perspective.

also, a disclaimer - this is based off of what i consider appropriate. if you’re ever worried, just straight up ask a smut writer about what kind of compliments they like, and what would be considered going too far

what compliments related to their work are ok?

so, for me, i highly prefer literature-related comments, however, general enjoyment comments are good as well! here are some examples of each type:

general enjoyment compliments are your safest bet for any fic. they’re a little basic, but authors will still love to see them in tags, asks, and reviews. they’re a fic writer’s bread and butter, and i’d even go so far to say that almost every smut fic writer would find these appropriate. here are some examples:

i loved this fic so much! you’re an amazing writing and i’m looking forward to reading more of your work

EXCUSE ME WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT - this was amazing! one of my fav fics of all time, you have so much talent

THANK YOU FOR THE FOOD (insert praying emoji here)

IJBGRJGOTER OP YOU ARE GOING TO K I L L M E

one of these days i am going to pass out from how good your writing is i SWEAR

you can be funny with these, but the general point is just to compliment the writer, tell them that you enjoy their work and that you value the effort they put into the piece. you can find these kinds of compliments on any sort of fic, i just feel like the last couple of really frantic keysmashing ones are far more common on smut fics!

now, on to literary compliments. this section can be a little trickier, since you’re specifically discussing the smutty content of the story, but here are some general themes to keep in mind: characterization, character relationship, plot/setup, author voice, and realism. since you’re complimenting a writer, leaning into literary elements can do you some good in keeping you grounded in the art of their work rather than stepping over the line into inappropriate comments. some examples:

you write him so well! i definitely think he would be a hard dom, and you captured that perfectly! the dialogue... just *chef’s kiss* (characterization)

dude, the relationship between her and y/n is ADORABLE. like yeah, the smut was awesome, as always, but i love how you captured how soft she would be in a relationship, and y/n is so gentle in return... it was just so sweet, i loved it! (relationships)

i don’t know how you do it but you write the BEST setups. i feel like you can write any character in any kink setup and i would just go “yeah, that makes total sense” even if it’s completely implausible. it’s just that good! respect. (setups/plot)

the way you write is so amazing. i love the way you describe everything, it’s so poetic and beautiful. i definitely think it suits the characters, and i love the idea of a sex scene like that being so intimate and beautiful (author voice)

i love that you don’t take everything so seriously! that you write little jokes even in your sex scenes - i hate reading scenes that are super stiff and overly dramatic, and you capture something so fun and sweet when you write, it’s awesome! (author voice)

ok, can i just say i LOVE how realistic your scenes are? like, i love how you include things like foreplay and aftercare and emphasize the playfulness and even the mistakes that can happen when you’re trying something with a partner for the first time. (realism)

i, personally, love literature related comments. i write smut as a form of literature, and even if it isn’t “high art” i do like it when people appreciate the time i take to work on characterization and similar elements

basically, treat a smut fic like any other fic when it comes to writing a compliment. smut can be literary too!

what compliments aren’t ok?

alright, so this is the important section. mostly this relates to personal experiences that are serious and unrelated to the work itself. basically, you’re treating me, the smut writer, like your friend that you share your sexual experiences with. if it doesn’t relate to the character, the fic, or my writing skill, it’s probably not appropriate. some examples

telling me sex acts you did while you read the fic. this is basically the classic “i jacked off to this, it’s sooooo good” comment. some people can jack off to a particularly curvy piece of driftwood - this isn’t a compliment, this is a violation of writer/reader trust. i don’t want to know about your personal sex life

personal sex stories. don’t tell me about how one time you were fucking your bf and it was like this fic i wrote - i don’t care, i don’t want to hear about how you had sex with your bf.

basically any real life, direct connections to you and your sex life that aren’t jokes (i’ll explain this in the next section)

also, a big section of compliments that are always a hard no - shit that relates back to MY sexual expertise. such as “wow you write this so well, you’re probably good in bed” or “wow you’re a freak huh? lmao” don’t fucking perceive me

what personal comments are ok?

so, this section deals with what asks you can send me that aren’t compliments - aka what messages relating to headcanons, your personal life, etc, that you can share with me that may or may not be smut related. this is specific to ME, as in, check in with other smut writers for these things

sharing jokes surrounding your personal life that may be slightly sexual. for example, at one point, i wrote a set of dick headcanons and an anon commented (in a joking way) that i described their bf’s dick perfectly. while this is a sexual comment, the anon didn’t tell me anything about their sex life or sex acts they committed - they just made a joking sexual comment that connected back to their daily life. for me, personally, if it is slightly sexual, but does not involve any actual sex/masturbation acts, it’s fine to joke about with me

in addition to the above, sending in comments like “thanks, bolt, now i have a praise kink” or similar, after i write something about it. they’re joking, and they’re fine to send in to my blog

sending me in smutty headcanons. i LOVE when people send me in smutty headcanons about how a character would act in certain scenarios. so PLEASE feel free to send those

questions about kink, kink culture, or even general sex ed questions. if it’s educational in nature, i would be more than happy to help, but a reminder that i am just a random stranger on the internet. you should probably just ask me what sex pollen is, and not how to fix your sex life lmao

telling me what you would do to a character is fine. like “omg i wanna peg Bolin so bad can you imagine the noises he would make?” is perfectly fine, to me. we’re all thirsting after these characters, and it’s a major subject of the blog, so i don’t mind these asks, especially since sometimes they lead to me writing out some headcanons or fleshing out a certain part of a character

what personal comments aren’t ok?

i covered this mostly in previous sections, but - 

discussions of your personal sex life, as in, sex acts you have committed or partaken in, joking or serious. while i am ok with jokes that are vaguely sexual or hold sexual connotations, please don’t reveal details or your personal sex or self-love life to me, even in joke form

anything pertaining to me and my sex life. there’s no need for you to know, and if i wanted to tell you, i would

starting an argument with a smut writer over what they will or will not write. everyone has different limits and boundaries, and some of these choices are shaped by very personal experiences that someone might not want to share, or things they cannot control - such as dysphoria, trauma, or mental illness. if someone’s limits or lack thereof are offensive to you, it is best that you simply block and move on instead of trying to incite an argument. 

this isn’t kink related, but most unrelated comments regarding your day/what you did. while it’s nice that you went out and got an iced coffee, i’m a lok writing blog. unless you relate it back to a headcanon you’re sharing with me, or a request you want me to complete, please don’t just tell me about your day (unless we are friends and talking on discord, lol)

[0vorenation0]

Jakes Surprise (Part 2 Final)

(Warning~ This story does not contain vore or any sexual components.)

Jakes bf turned to me and looked down, thinking about what the plan was. While he thought I opened my suit case and grabbed Jakes Bday gift. I couldn’t wait till tomorrow so I wanted to give it to him when he saw I was here for birthday. Once I got it out and placed it to the side, Jakes bf had an idea.

Jakes bf~”I got it Cal, I’m gonna act like I have a early surprise for him like a present. Then I’m gonna tell him to cover his eyes and I’ll bring you out and we will surprise him.”

Me~” That’s perfect, okay we got a game plan. Alright u go get jake and I’ll wait here until u come and get me.”

Jakes bf left and went to go get Jake, I stood there waiting for him and while he did that I put my clothes in the dresser. Jakes bf came in right after I was done and gestures me to come slowly and quietly. I took off my shoes so he couldnt hear two sets of shoes and walked with him. We got to the living room when I saw my buddy Jake standing there eyes covered.

Jake~” come on bud what’s the surprise, you didn’t get a puppy or something cuz I don’t think we’re ready for that kind of commitment.”

Jakes bf~” not quite a puppy but your going to love it, it’s something you would never have expected and you will most likely never forget it.”

Jake~”surprises are scary when I’m not the one doing them can I open my eyes yet!!”

I stood in front of him and jakes bf counted from three.

Jakes bf~” 3, 2, 1 open your eyes jake!!!!! Happy Birthday!!!!”

Jake opens his eyes real quick and his eyes widened as he froze in shock.

Me~” how’s this for a birthday surprise Jake, Happy Birthday my friend.”

Jake finally came to and jumped in excitement and screamed “OMG CAL, is it really you?!!! WTF I thought u were in Texas. Omg bro I’m crying COME HERE give me a hug.!!!!”

Jake ran to me and gave me the biggest hug I had ever received, a tear feel down the my cheek as I finally met in real life my best bud jake. We probably hugged for a solid 2 mins, you would think that two brothers had been reunited after years apart. After the hugging and some crying stopped, Jake couldn’t believe it. He turned to his bf and asked him if he had anything to do with it. He shocked his head yes and jake hugged and kissed his bf, he came back to me and hugged me again.

Jake~” Cal this is the best Birthday present I have ever gotten, thank you so much. I’m so happy and excited, wait how long are you staying. It’s just just till tomorrow right?”

Me~”Haha Love you jake and happy birthday, naww I’m satying for a week bud. So we can go do lots of stuff.”

Jake~” Are you serious a whole week? OMG YES, I can’t wait to show u around and have fun. What should we do first? Maybe the university I’d love to show u around or the museum, maybe the park.”

Me and Jakes bf~” slow down Jake, we can do all of those things haha.”

Cal~”so now that you got to see ur bfs big present, would u like to open mine?”

Jake~”You got me a gift too, aww Cal thanks. Let’s see it”

I tell jake to stay there and I go into the guest room and pick up the presents. All neatly wrapped in a box. I head back out and hand it to Jake.

Cal~”here you go bud hope you like it.”

Jake sits down on the couch and opens the wrapping, he gets a knife and cuts the box open. The box opens and jake takes out a bottle wrapped in tissue paper. He tears the tissue paper off and smiles. Then looks up at me.

Cal~”I know it’s not much bud, but I promised to give that to you when I visited u for the first time. Do u like it?”

The gift was a Roger Staubach Dr. Pepper two liter bottle, I promised Jake one day while we were talking. That I would personally deliver that bottle to him, most people would think it wasnt worth anything. For me and Jake tho it represented our friendship, he hated the Dallas Cowboys but he was a sports fan and it came from me. He smiled at me and said,

Jake~”I cant believe you remembered to bring it Cal, thanks this means so much to me. Every time I look at it, I will remember this day and how u made me feel. This to me is better then any expensive gift because this comes from you and it means a lot to you.”

The bottle wasn’t worth but 15 bucks, I had picked it up and some garage sale. The worth was that it was a gift to my dear friend Jake. That’s what made it priceless in his eyes. He put it one the table and stood up and went over to me. He hugged me again and said thank you for everything, your my best friend. Meeting jake for the first time was the best day so far of my life. After his gift, he gave me a beer and we sat down to watch an old Syracuse game that was probably ten years old. We laughed and talked me Jake and his bf, I had a great night. We talked about the future and the past. The present and random stuff, I wouldn’t trade that for anything. The day ended and we all went to sleep, the following day Jakes bf made me and Jake a birthday breakfast and we discussed what we would do today. Jake was really excited to show me his campus.

So after we ate we all got ready and went out, he showed me around his campus. It was beautiful and then we went out to a pizza place cuz i wanted to try some NY pizza. It was a the best pizza ever haha, the next day and following rest of the week was so much fun. We went to see a movie, a museum and we even drove four hours so I could see the 9/11 memorial and the Statue of Liberty. The vacation I decided to take was the best trip of my life and I loved every minute of it. Jake and his bf were sad on the final morning before I had to leave. The end turned out like the beginning, lots of hugs and a little crying. I was saddened to go home but I told them I would be back as soon as I could, and told jake and his bf to surprise me in Texas when they could. With that we said goodbye and I left home for Texas. I will never forget meeting my best friend Jake, and having an awesome week. Now that I met him, I felt closer then ever to him. He was like my brother I never knew I had, you wonder how someone u meet online can make a huge impact on ur life and then when u meet them. They turn out to make and even bigger impact on ur life.

Right when I got on my plane jake went out to get the mail. It was a birthday card and he opened it, happy birthday jake. Hope you loved ur gift and I know I’m writing this in advance but I love you bud and I’m so happy I got to meet u. See you soon bud!!!

That’s where the story ends everyone, HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAKE. I love you so much, u mean so much to me and hopefully one day that’s how us meeting will go. @texanstrongjake

[foreverwayward]

“Lost in You” Part 3

Jensen Ackles x Reader

Word Count: 2538

Warnings: none? Possible fluff. Language.

SideBar: A/U where Jensen is single.

Summary: You and your best friend (Y/BF/N) go to a Supernatural convention. It was supposed to just be a fun day; nothing too crazy. That is…until he saw you.

Part 1   Part 2

Back in your room, you and Y/BF/N packed your luggage and got ready to go. Your head was still swimming out of control over the whirlwind that had been your last twenty-four hours. The high you were still riding had you feeling more alive than you had in a long time. The two of you were practically giddy with excitement that you were going to the “Supernatural” set and that you and Jensen clearly had something between you.

You pulled out your phone as you sat on the edge of your bed and smiled as you texted Jensen. “Well, looks like we’re ready to go. What’s the plan?”

It didn’t take more than a minute for him to text back, his eagerness making you even more excited. “Lemme make a quick call :)”

While you were fixing your hair, your phone chimed with Jensen’s next text. “Alright! It’s all set. Head on down to the lobby and call me.”

“Okay,” you messaged back, unsure of what was to come. Turning to Y/BF/N you popped up the handle on your luggage, ready to roll it out. “He said to go to the lobby and call him when we’re down there.”

Your friend shrugged. “He’s the boss.”

------

The cool air from the lobby A/C helped your anxious growing nerves; though your fidgeting hands didn’t help you hide it. Even after spending time with Jensen, calling him was still beyond terrifying. So, with a deep breath, you dialed his number and closed your eyes tightly as you felt on the verge of vomiting.

“Hey!” that familiar gruff voice answered. “You guys ready?”

Trying to sound as cool and collected as your shaking voice would let you, you told him, “yep! We’re down in the lobby by the front door.”

“Perfect. I want you to go out the front to the car loop. Let me know when you’re there.”

“Okay,” you answered with a nervous chuckle as you nodded toward your friend to head out. Once you stepped outside, the two of you stood waiting for your next instruction. “Alright, we’re here.”

“Okay, do you see a black SUV out there?” As you scanned the area, you listened to Jensen go on. “There’ll be a driver waiting for you.”

Turning to the right, you saw the car and the gentleman waving you in his direction. “I see him.”

“Alright.” You couldn’t see the smile that was growing on Jensen’s face as he talked you through the plan. “Stay on the phone with me until you get settled in.”

“Will do.”

Walking up to the car, the driver stood by the passenger door and opened it. “Y/N?”

“Uh--that’s me.”

“I’m Frank. Mr. Ackles has instructed me to take you to the airport. Are you ready to go?”

You and Y/BF/N tried not to squeal with excitement and you nodded. “Yes, sir.”

“Frank is fine.” The driver offered a hand to take your luggage and you both obliged as you got into the back.

The black car smelled of new leather and had soft rock music playing. All of the windows were heavily tinted and gentle, cool air flowed around you. Once you were settled in, you held the phone to your ear once more. “Okay, we’re in.”

“Awesome,” Jensen said with obvious enthusiasm. “So, Frank’s gonna take care of you guys. His job is to make sure you get here and everything has been handled. Don’t worry about a thing.”

Unsure of how the day was going to go, you chuckled nervously. “Uh--okay. You know you didn’t have to go to all this trouble.”

“Who said it was any trouble?” His tone reminded you of the one he used when he would get that pleased smirk on his face. “I told you...I got it.”

“Alright. Well, I guess that means I’ll be seeing you soon.”

Jensen sighed through a sweet laugh. “Can’t wait.”

------

“Aren’t we supposed to go check in?” Y/BF/N asked leaning in toward Frank as he drove through the back of the airport.

Very nonchalantly, Frank pulled onto the tarmac of the opposite side of the airport. “Everything’s been taken care of.”

“Where are we going?” she whispered to you.

All you could do was shrug. “He didn’t tell me anything.”

The car stopped and Frank got out before heading to your side. He opened your door and as you stepped out, you gasped. Once Y/BF/N followed quickly behind, she too shared the same shocked sound.

“Oh...my...god.” There was a private plane only fifty or so feet away; the stairs down and ready to board. “This is for us?”

“Yup.” Frank went to the trunk and grabbed your bags before heading for the plane. “This way, ladies.”

Your friend took your hand and you both walked together with giant grins on your face. The whole experience was more than you could have possibly dreamed. It was far from the coach seat on a commercial flight that you had expected.

Inside, five comfortable chairs and a sofa sat in the heart of the plane. It too smelled of leather and what you could have sworn it smelled like to be rich. It was stylish and modern with a black and white motif.

“Look at this!” Y/BF/N exclaimed excitedly as she picked up a pillow. “We’re on a plane that has fucking decorative pillows.” She squeezed it to her chest and hummed. “Oh, it’s soft.”

You found your seat and with a heavy, content sigh, you collapsed into it. “I can’t believe he did all of this.”

“Yeah! For you! You sure you didn’t sleep with him?” she teased.

Picking up one of the pillows yourself, you chucked it in her direction with a giggle. “Shut up.”

Your phone alerted you and you took it out of your pocket. Of course, it was a text from your newest favorite person. “Frank said you guys made it there okay. Do you have everything you need?”

“Jensen, this is crazy. You didn’t have to do all of this.”

“I know. I wanted to. :) Have a safe flight!”

“We will. And, Jensen...thank you for everything.”

“Just get here. That’s all the thanks I need. xoxo”

Did he just “kiss-hug” you? Your head was spinning with such grand gestures and all Jensen had done for you. But that “xoxo” made your entire day.

Frank went to the back of the aircraft and made himself comfortable as he made a few phone calls before take off.

As you tucked your cellphone back into your pocket, the flight attendant came out in a skirt, heels, and silk blouse. She was beautiful; far too beautiful to be a flight attendant. “Welcome aboard. We’ll be making a straight, nonstop flight to Vancouver, Canada. We will be in the air for approximately five hours, so please don’t hesitate to let us know if you need anything at all.” The attendant grabbed two small menus and handed them to you and Y/BF/N.

Glancing over it, you saw a list of delicious-sounding cocktails and top-shelf booze. You and your friend shared a look of excitement as the captain walked onboard.

“Welcome, aboard. Shall we get you two to Vancouver?”

------

The flight felt like it drug on forever, but only because of your excitement to see Jensen again. You and Y/BF/N had the time of your lives on that plane right though. The two of you shared drinks, delicious appetizers and watched movies while talking nonstop about the thrill of everything happening. It was like a fantasy.

It was late into the night when you landed and you eagerly looked out the windows just excited to be there.

The door opened and the stairs lowered before you and your friend headed out. You were laughing and having more fun than either of you imagined, and the trip had only started.

Ahead of you, was Frank, with yet another large tinted vehicle. Your luggage was already loaded and ready to go as he opened the doors for you both. “Welcome to Vancouver.”

Still buzzing, you and Y/BF/N crawled into the car. Grinning like her face would get stuck that way, she turned to you. “This is insanity, Y/N.”

“I know!”

And then your phone chimed again. Quickly, you unlocked it and saw Jensen’s newest text. “Welcome to Canada :)”

“Thanks! Jensen, this whole trip has been crazy. I can’t believe you did all of this.”

“I can’t believe you don’t think you’re worth every bit of it.”

Your heart stopped then and there; you were sure of it. Nothing you could say would be the appropriate response and your fingers danced over the screen trying to figure out what to say. But he beat you to it and another text came through.

“See you in an hour. :)”

“Seatbelts, ladies,” Frank told you over his shoulder from the driver’s seat as he started up the large SUV.

------

An hour that felt like an eternity; that’s the only way to explain that car drive. You were practically having to keep yourself from jumping up and down with nerves and your best friend took your hand.

“You’re freaking out now, aren’t you?”

“Yes!” you exclaimed, only to see Frank look at you through the rearview mirror before you hushed yourself. “Of course, I’m freaking out. Is this just too fucking crazy? Should I not have done this?”

She grabbed your face and forced you to look at her. “As your best friend, I have to tell you to snap the hell out of it. This is the coolest thing that has ever happened to either of us and I demand that you let yourself enjoy every second.”

Your breathing slowed as she held you in place. “Okay. Okay. I can do this.”

“Fuck yeah, you can.”

It was only shortly after that you pulled in front of a beautiful building. Even in the dark, it was well lit and the exterior alone showed you the place was clearly beyond your lifetime budget.

Again, the doors began to open and you turned to get out. Only this time, your stomach jumped as you saw Jensen standing there holding the door for you with a massive grin.

“Hey, beautiful.”

“Hey,” you replied with a nervous smile. 

With you both out of the car, Jensen closed the door behind you and he turned to Frank. “Hey, man. Thanks for handling everything today.”

“Not a problem, Jensen.” And with that, Frank went to grab your things and bring them inside.

And that was when he finally had a moment to look into your eyes again. Jensen pushed back that strand of hair from your face that he began to know and love all too well. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

He pulled you in for a hug and you wrapped your arms around him. You could have sworn that the man smelled better every single time you saw him. Closing your eyes, and feeling the warmth from his solid chest, you soaked him in. Jensen was your newest drug of choice; one you had no intention of finding sobriety from.

When he pulled away, he smiled before hugging Y/BF/N. “Thank you so much for making the trip with Y/N.”

She looked up at him and beamed. “What can I say?” she shrugged and feigned a dramatic sigh. “The things I do for my best friend.” Jensen chuckled and Y/BF/N and resituated the purse on her shoulder. “But seriously, thank you for everything. This whole trip has been incredible.”

“Well, it’s only getting started.” Jensen spun around to you and licked his bottom lip flirtatiously. “Come on, lemme show you around.” Taking your hand in yours, he began to lead you on.

You gulped hard at the feel of his large but soft grip and your eyes met Y/BF/N’s. “Oh, my god,” she mouthed as you all headed up toward the main entrance.

Once you had gone up the steps, Jensen led you both through the lobby and directly to the elevator. He put a key into the system before pushing the button. With Frank in tow with the luggage, you all went up to the nineteenth floor. The elevator doors opened and your jaw nearly dropped when you saw it led you right into a beautiful condo.

With Jensen still holding your hand, he led you all inside. “What do you think?”

“What do I think?” you chuckled through a scoff in awe. “Jensen, this is amazing.”

“I’m so glad you like it. I thought you two would like your own space while you’re here.” He dropped the key into your hand and smiled. “And Frank is gonna be around to help you with whatever you need while you’re here.” As Y/BF/N went inside like a kid in a candy store, Jensen held you back. His voice was low and he took both of your hands in his. “I can’t tell you how happy I am that you came.”

“Me too.” Lost in his green eyes that you’ve fallen so hard for, you sighed feeling complete now that you were with him again.

Jensen tilted down and put his forehead to yours. “You’ve had a long day. Get some rest. We start shooting super early but feel free to head over whenever you want. I hate that I got to see you so little tonight, but we can make up for it tomorrow.”

“Promise?” you asked sweetly.

He hummed softly and chuckled deep in his chest. “You better believe it.” Once again, he kissed your head and waved to Y/BF/N. “Have a good night!”

“Oh,” Y/BF/N said with enthusiasm. “We will.”

“I’ll see you guys tomorrow.”

You felt a mild sadness come over you as your hands slipped apart while he walked away. “Tomorrow.”

Jensen got into the elevator with Frank and looked back at you once more with a flirty wink before the doors closed and he disappeared.

Once he was gone, you and Y/BF/N waited a moment before squealing like excited teenage girls and hugged each other while jumping up and down.

“I’m so lucky that my best friend’s so damn hot!” your friend yelled out playfully.

You looked around and saw the large double doors off to the side and gave her a sly smirk before darting off in their direction. “First one in gets to pick their bed!”

“You cheat!” The two of you laughed as you disappeared into your beautiful room.

You and Y/BF/N had been on one hell of a ride in less than two days, and you were nowhere near ready to let it end. But as fun as it all was, all that mattered to you was that you would soon be with Jensen again. You would have been happy with a room at the Hyatt or whatever, just as long as it meant time with him. That’s all the trip truly was for you; a chance to be with the man of your dreams.

------

Forever Taglist: @gemini0410  @huntersociopathavenger @paintballkid711 @crystallstaircase @love-nakamura @da5haexowin @flamencodiva @salt-n-burn-em-all @spnbaby-67 @sandycub @mrsambroserollinsacklesmgk @akshi8278 @maddiepants @deansenwackles @lauravic @mrsjenniferwinchester @sea040561@sister-winchesters99 @rosey1981 @titty-teetee @a--1--1--3 @winchestergirl82 @screechingartisancashbailiff @my-proof-is-you @x-waywardaf-x @deans-baby-momma @shadows-and-padlocked-hearts @rainflowermoon @princessizzy36 @jensendeanlover317 @iamabeautifulperson18 @alwaysdreamingforthebest @bitterstar88 @mynightmaresstuff @themoonandotherslikeit @monkeymcpoopoo @calaofnoldor

[katelides]

One Shot 26

@rejection-isnt-failure

Promt Yes yes yes yes. I've read this so many times my friend. High school aus are amazing, especially when cheerleading and other sports are concerned!! Amazing!! Can you continue doing this type of au? ❤❤ Ooooh. Could we also maybe have a prequel, where Beca gets up the nerve to ask Chloe out?! Ie. Where Beca first sees Chloe and makes an idiot out of herself because she has a crush, but maybe Chloe has a bf on the basketball team, which is why she initially tries out before finding out she's really good at it... and Chloe finds herself charmed by Beca's attempts to talk to her... I dunno. You get my drift ;)

WHEN I READ THIS I OPENLY CRIED FOR AN HOUR!!! THIS IS THE CUTEST THING THAT HAPPENED IN THE PAST 2 WEEKS! I COULD NOT NOT WRITE THIS AS SOON AS I GOT THIS SOOOO HERE WE GO

find previous one shots on ff.net or AO3

One Shot 26:

Beca is nervously pacing in the locker-room. She had told the rest of the girls to go and warm up and that she would join them in a minute. She has been thinking of telling Chloe about her feelings for her but the fear of losing her forever kind of puts a hold on that. The redhead had been one of her best friends since they were little kids and her feelings had grown over the years and she always pushed them down. But she couldn’t do it anymore, she has to tell her.

The brunette is so deep in thought that she doesn’t hear the door open nor does she see Aubrey and Stacie walk in. “Beca? Are you alright?” Stacie’s voice sounds worried as she watches her tiny friend freeze in shock. “W-what are you doing here?” Aubrey rolls her eyes in annoyance. “We came looking for you when the team ran in but you weren’t with them. Chloe got worried.” At the mention of the redhead’s name Beca tenses. “What’s going on? Why are you being so weird?”

Beca mumbles something inaudible. “Ok, what did you just say? I didn’t get that.” The short brunette takes a deep breath before answering Aubrey’s question. “I like Chloe, like I like-like her.” Beca cringes at how weird and pathetic that just sounded. “Freaking finally!” Stacie shouts throwing her hands up. “What are you still doing here? Go and tell her.” Aubrey adds pointing at the door. “You really think I should?” The two girls roll their eyes. “I swear to god Mitchell, if you don’t go out there and tell her how you feel I’m going to kick your ass.”

“Relax Posen, I want to tell her but I also want to do something special?” The longer she talks the more insecure she gets. “What were you thinking about doing?” Stacie asks genuinely interested. “If I want this to work I’ll need help and I mean all the cheerleaders, I’ll talk to the team and maybe we can make it happen during the finals.” Aubrey nods. “Of course we’ll help you out with whatever you need.”

Beca puts up a nervous smile. “Relax Mitchell, she’ll say yes. Trust us.” Aubrey nods in affirmation before pushing the two brunette’s out of the locker-room. “Let’s go, we need to get to practice. And you need to train your team so we can claim another victory this year.”

The three girls walk into the gym. Aubrey and Stacie slam into Beca when she suddenly stops. “What the hell?” Stacie wants to shake the tiny captain but stops when she sees what Beca is looking at. They are watching Chloe getting hit on by Tom. He’s a senior and it was no secret that the older guy had a crush on their redheaded friend. And apparently he said something funny and Chloe is laughing out loud. The girls watch as the tall basketball player leans in and kisses Chloe on her cheek. The two cheerleaders watch as Beca tenses up right before their eyes. “Beca-“

“I’m fine… I’ll be alright.” Beca shakes her head. “Team huddle up!” Beca runs off towards her co-captain Jesse and ignores everything else around her. “Bree, please tell me that everything Chloe told you about Beca was real because if any of it was a joke I’m not sure… I’m not sure how this is going to end well.” Aubrey looks at her girlfriend, then at her best friend and then at Beca. “Chloe has always had feelings for Beca, and right now I’m going to talk some sense into our cheer captain.”

Stacie watches Aubrey walk over to Chloe. The tall brunette looks over to Beca and their eyes meet. Stacie waves her over. Beca hesitates for a brief moment but decides to join her best friend anyway. “Before you get mad or walk away please hear me out.” Beca rolls her eyes but waits for the speech she knows will come. “I have an idea, at the finals game during halftime we can plan something huge for you to ask Chloe out. She won’t be able to say no.”

“And what do you suppose we do huh? By the time we do it it’ll be too late.” Stacie groans. “Have some faith, we’ll get the teams together today after school and plan the perfect surprise.” Beca lets out a sigh. “Fine but how do we get Chloe away from the team?” Stacie smirks. “Leave that to me.” Just at that moment Jesse runs up to them. “Talking about a perfect opportunity… Hey Jesse, I need a favor.”

Stacie quickly explains the situation and Jesse and the co-captain grin at his tiny friend. “Sure, no problem, anything for my favorite girls.” Beca hits Jesse against his shoulder. “Alright lets go we have teams to train… Thank you for everything you guys.” The three high-five and Stacie quickly joins the rest of the girls. So all

Both basketball teams and the cheerleaders are sitting outside on the grass. Well, everyone except for Chloe, Jesse and Tom. “So if I get this straight you want us to get all of this ready by the finals in 2 weeks?” One of the cheerleaders asks incredulously. “If we all pitch in we can make it work.” Aubrey says. “Well, I guess it’s the least we can do for our amazing captains and friends.” A girl from the basketball teams says with a little whoop at the end.

Beca chuckles at the cheers following. “Hey what are you guys cheering about?” Chloe’s bubbly voice finds its way to the group. “Chloe… uhm-uhm-uhm…” Beca is starting to panicking and everyone is starting to notice so they try to help out by shouting anything that springs to mind.

“Nothing”

“You”

“Just talking”

“Love”

“Memories”

“The game”

Before it can get out of hand Aubrey shushes the group. “What they are trying to say is… we were talking about how amazing the final is going to be in two weeks.” Chloe raises her brow in confusion. “Uhm are you all ok? You’re acting weird.” Beca jumps up with a slightly forced laugh. “Whaaaat? Nooo,” Aubrey rolls her eyes at the high pitched brunette waving her arms around. “everything is fine, right guys?”

Chloe laughs at the brunette’s antics. “Relax, I believe you Becs.” Beca awkwardly scratches the back of her neck. “I don’t know about you guys but I need to study for a test so I’m going home.” One by one the others follow Stacie’s lead and slowly the only people left are Beca, Chloe, Jesse and Tom. “Hey Chlo do you want to go and study together?” Tom asks with an unusually large smirk. Beca’s face falls and she prepares for the hard sting that’s going to follow when Chloe accepts.

“Actually Beca and I always study for our tests together and I am having some trouble with math and she knows how to explain things to me.” Beca tries to stifle a laugh when she picks up Tom’s scowl. “I mean only if that’s ok with you?” Chloe turns around to face the brunette with a soft smile. “Of course, I would never let you down.”

Not in a million year Beca could ever say no to the adorableness that’s Chloe Beale. “Great, can we go get some take out on our way? My parents are out tonight and we have no food.” Beca quickly agrees and takes Chloe’s bag from her because she always does. All Chloe can do is smile and peck Beca on the cheek because arguing about it is a lost cause.

-,-,-,-,-

2 WEEKS LATER

The game is about to start and Beca is freaking out internally. She’s going over the plays with the rest of the team. “Alright, we’re going to rock this. BHS Bulldogs on 3… ONE-TWO-BULDOGS WHOE WHOE WHOE!” The team gets cheered on even more by their awesome cheer squad. That’s the last push the team needs before running out on the field.

The game has been really intense since the very beginning. The score is tight until the break when the opponents knock Beca down so they can steal the ball when the buzzer sounds. The team quickly makes their way towards their captain on the floor. “Are you ok?” One of the girls asks slightly panicked. “I’m fine but that was a dirty trick.” The brunette grunts when she gets up. “Hey I don’t want to be a spoilsport but if you want to get that surprise going you should get ready.”

“Oh shoot yeah you’re right.” Beca makes her way to the side line so she can give Aubrey and Stacie a sign. They get the clue and take Chloe down while Beca makes her way to the manager who is totally in on the plan. Music starts playing and the whole field gets extremely quiet. Chloe is just confused, she recognizes the song because it’s one of her favorites.

Her heart stops for a moment when she hears the sweet voice that can only belong to one person. The person she has been crushing on forever. The one person she couldn’t live without. “Beca?”

I wanna follow where she goes I think about her and she knows it I wanna let her take control 'Cause everytime that she gets close, yeah

She pulls me in enough to keep me guessing And maybe I should stop and start confessing Confessing, yeah

Beca makes herself fully visible so she can really see Chloe’s reaction to everything. The girls from the cheer squad make their way down and start dancing to the beat.

Oh, I've been shaking I love it when you go crazy You take all my inhibitions Baby, there's nothing holding me back You take me places that tear up my reputation Manipulate my decisions Baby, there's nothing holding me back There's nothing holding me back There's nothing holding me back

She says that she's never afraid Just picture everybody naked She really doesn't like to wait Not really into hesitation

Pulls me in enough to keep me guessing And maybe I should stop and start confessing Confessing, yeah

The boys from the other Barden University Basketball team run out and join is as best as they can.

Oh, I've been shaking I love it when you go crazy You take all my inhibitions Baby, there's nothing holding me back You take me places that tear up my reputation Manipulate my decisions Baby, there's nothing holding me back There's nothing holding me back

Beca is standing on the middle of a perfectly formed circle while Aubrey and Stacie lead Chloe toward her. The redhead is gently crying with a huge smile plastered on her face.

'Cause if we lost our minds and we took it way too far I know we'd be alright, I know we would be alright If you were by my side and we stumbled in the dark I know we'd be alright, I know we would be alright 'Cause if we lost our minds and we took it way too far But I know we'd be alright, I know we would be alright If you were by my side and we stumbled in the dark I know we'd be alright, I know we would be alright

Chloe has no idea when the girls had broken the circle – who would blame her, she’s mesmerized by the most amazing girl in the world – to come back with huge boards with the words ‘WILL YOU GO OUT WITH ME?’ being spelled out.

Oh, I've been shaking I love it when you go crazy You take all my inhibitions Baby, there's nothing holding me back You take me places that tear up my reputation Manipulate my decisions Baby, there's nothing holding me back There's nothing holding me back I feel so free when you're with me, baby Baby, there's nothing holding me back

The song ends and Beca sheepishly smiles at the redhead before her. She drops her arm that’s holding the microphone. “Sooooo,” Beca drags out awkwardly. “I guess the signs kind of speak for me but… Chloe Anne Beale will you go out on a date with me?”

Chloe stays extremely quiet and Beca starts panicking. The brunette takes a few steps back preparing herself to bolt if Chloe turns her down. Aubrey and Stacie see this happening so step up and stop her. “Chloe?” Aubrey questions her best friend. “Beca I-I would be honored…” the redhead runs forward and leaps into the brunette’s arms, wrapping her arms around her neck to pull her in for a long, tight hug. The field erupts in loud cheers and the girls break apart with huge smiles.

The announcer clears his throat hesitantly. “I’m really sorry folks, I hate to interrupt this wonderful moment but we have a game to play.” Beca looks up to the booth and waves at the guy to show him it’s ok. Chloe pecks Beca on the lips whispering “Go win this game.”

With a new found boost Beca pumps her fist up. “Let’s go team.” The teams all go to their initial places. The basketball girls on the field, the basketball boys sitting on the bleachers and the cheerleaders making their way to the side to cheer even louder for their team.

-,-,-,-,-

30 seconds left on the clock and the score is 99 – 98 and the BHS Bulldogs are losing by one point. Beca is open wide and gets passed the ball.

15 seconds left on the clock. The brunette still has to get to the other side of the field but it’s going to be a very tight stretch.  

8 seconds left on the clock. She decides to make a run for it but the opposing team does not make it easy for her.

3 seconds left, Beca’s far behind the three point line and the shot is risky and maybe too far away. Now or never… Beca takes the risk, and shoots.

2 seconds… the ball travels through the air.

1 seconds… the ball hits the ring.

The buzzer sounds the end of the game but no one makes a sound, no one even dares to take a breath. The ball goes around the ring once… twice… thr-

Beca’s world freezes and she doesn’t hear the loud cheers erupting from the crowd. She gets crushed by her team and the rest of the high school teams. They won only 2 points difference but they still won. The brunette gets lifted up by the boys. Chloe is beaming right up to her. Beca taps the boys on their shoulders to let her down which they quickly comply to.

The brunette gets tapped on her shoulder before she can reach Chloe. She turns around and is being offered the cup by the team captain of the opposing team. “Great game you guys are amazing opponents.”  She takes the cup and holds out her hand so the two captains can shake on it. “Not so bad yourself can’t wait to see what you have in store next year.” The two girls part with smiles and no hard feelings.

Beca finally gets to turn around to face the redhead she’s been waiting to hug. “Hey…” Chloe looks down at her shoes, looking extremely adorable. “Hey…” Beca chuckles. Stacie rolls her eyes and can’t take it. “Oh for crying out loud Beca, just  kiss her already.” Beca cups Chloe’s cheek to make her look up, straight into her eyes searching for a sign from the girl that she might not want to be kissed. But luckily her smile only grows wider. They both lean in to press their lips against the other’s.

It feels like thousands for butterflies just escaped their bodies and fireworks are being lit around them. They thought it something like this would only happen in movies but boy were they wrong. They don’t want to break apart but have too, seeing that they’re still surrounded by way too many people.

Life couldn’t get sweeter for our two high school basketball and cheerleading captains. And it would only get better.

I DO NOT OWN PITCH PERFECT!

FOLLOW ME ON TUMBLR FOR SNEEK PEAKS FOR UPCOMING CHAPTERS –katelides

Let me know what you think, feedback is always fun to have :D

[kirishwima]

Hey there cool bean! So.. I absolutely love Hance and I also absolutely love Fake Dating, Wrong Number and that "whatever you write on your skin appears on your soulmates skin" Soulmate AUs and I'd love you forever and beyond if you could write a normal life/pre-Boltron OS about one of these because that would be like the most awesome thing ever ;^;

Hey lovely!

So funny thing is, I love Hance a lot too and also really like all three ideas sooo i tried adding all of them into one fic lol ;u; hope you like it!

*****

Hunk stared at the text, his phone’s screen blearing and blurring his vision with its brightness.

To say he was…confused, would be an understatement.

He looked to the message once more, giving it another quick read.

From: Unknown

>Dude hi, look, i knw we ain’t that close or anythin but i rly rly RLY need u to call me and pretend ur my bf rn

Hunk sighed and scrolled down, reading the next chain of messages.

From: Unknown

>this creepy dude is hittin on me and idk how to tell him to back off so cmon pls call me n pretend ur my bf u don’t even have to talk or anythin

From: Unkown

>im gonna owe u like 100000 coffees cMON

It was a do-or-die moment, Hunk knew that.

He knew that the best option would be to ignore this messages-they were obviously not intended for him in the first place.

On the other hand…the person did seem really stressed out. Hunk knew if he was in the situation this person was in, he’d more than likely do the same thing, his fingers shooting a text to his best friend Pidge faster than you could say ‘burrito’.

It was a do-or-die moment.And Hunk decided to go for it full force, before the little anxious thoughts tugging on his skin pulled his barely existent bravado away from his grip.

He clicked on the unknown number and let his phone ring, shakily bringing it close to his ear.

The first beep went by unanswered, Hunk’s anxiety only heightening at the sound.The second beep followed, yet before a third one could be heard, the person on the other line picked up.

“Hello?”

The voice was sweet, a light pitch of anxiety clouding over it, yet even with the added stress and the distress of the phone, it was still one of the nicest sound Hunk’s ears had ever heard.

“U-uh, yes?”

Hunk mentally slapped himself, shutting his eyes and shaking his head.Nice going Hunk, he chided himself, way to show you’re intimidated by a person you haven’t even seen before

“Awe babe!” the voice cooed, the words of affection making goosebumps run over Hunk’s body, “you changed your phone number after all? I told you it was about time to!” the person continued, the sounds of background music and chatter now registering in Hunk’s mind.

“I-uh-yeah. Phone number. That’s right.” he stumbled, somewhat astounded at how easily this play of affection rolled through this person’s mouth.

“Well I’m glad you called me. I was just at your favourite coffee shop and wanted to ask you what coffee you wanted me to bring over! I didn’t see you at all today, I missed you.”

Hunk run a hand through his mark absent-mindedly, enjoying the soft voice over the line.

“A coffee would be great, yeah.” he mumbled, slowly feeling more at ease.He wondered if this person had him on loud speaker, or if his own little show of fake-dating this person was more unnecessary than helpful.

“What? You want me to go over straight away? Are you sure?”

A-ha.

Hunk huffed a laugh, quickly realising that the only person that could hear him right now was this guy he was talking to.

“Alright, alright, I’m on my way! Love you, see you in a bit!”

He heard the person mutter something, another somewhat gruffer voice answering back to him, quickly followed by shuffling, the sounds of the coffee shop promptly disappearing.

“…are you still there?” the voice asked, the tone much quieter than before.

The high pitch and sweetness was a show, after all.

“Yup.” Hunk replied, a profound comfort washing over him, all his previous stress diminished.He slumped onto his bed with relief and sighed, waiting to hear an explanation from this unknown person.

“I’ll just go ahead and assume you’re not Steve, are you?”

He laughed at that, shaking his head despite knowing the person he was speaking to couldn’t see him.

“Afraid not. And I guess you didn’t actually mean to text me did you?”

The voice laughed, the sound like water from a creek, crystal clear and joyous to Hunk’s ears.

“No, no, definitely not.” he laughed, “Still, thanks for helping me out. There was this dude that wouldn’t take no for an answer. He only backed away when he thought I was talking to my boyfriend or, whatever.”

“Yeah dude, I hear you, this kind of people are the worst” Hunk grumbled, scrunching his nose in distaste, “Why can’t they just respect another person’s boundaries and get that ‘no’ means ‘no’?!”

The person on the phone hummed in agreement.

“Thank you, that’s exactly what I was thinking!”  he huffed, “it’s so easy and yet some people are just..ugh” he groaned in defeat.

Hunk laughed, letting a short silence stretch that really wasn’t as uncomfortable as Hunk thought it should be.

“I never got your name by the way.” the voice spoke up, a shyer tone in their sound, “I’m Lance, Lance Sanchez.”

He let the name roll through his mind for a moment, trying to think if he’d ever heard it before. He was certain he never did, but there was something about it, about this person’s voice, their mannerism, that made Hunk feel a familiar tinge in his chest, as if something in his heart was tugging it’s way to his brain, smacking it and saying ’of course you know it, silly!’

“Hello?”

Hunk shook himself out of his trance.

“Yeah hi! Sorry, sorry, just tryin’ to figure out if I know you from somewhere. I’m Hunk Garett.”

The voice-Lance, Lance huffed, the sound making white noise travel through Hunk’s speaker.

“Man, I thought you were going to hung up on me or something. Which I’d totally get, but you know, putting a name to my life-saver would be nice-“

“Life-saver? I hardly did anything!” Hunk interrupted, his face reddening at the characterisation. Here he was, talking to thus guy with this soothing voice, that was calling him a life-saver?

“Yes life-saver, don’t be humble, and anyway, as I was saying, putting a name to the voice would be nice, but you know what would be better?”

“W-what?”

“Taking said life-saver with his honey-sweet voice out for a coffee. You know, as a thank-you for getting me away from a creepy flirt even though you had zero obligation to?”

The words died in Hunk’s mouth, his eyes widening at face heating up.

Coffee? Honey-sweet?

Was…was this guy asking him out on a date?!

“I-no-there’s no need-“

“Aw come on, I did promise you a bunch of coffees in the text. Well, I thought I was promising Steve coffees, until I realised I’d saved his phone number wrongly in the first place, but anyway! The offer stands if you want it!” Lance cheered, the sounds of a bustling street failing to dull his loud voice.

Hunk mulled over the idea, feeling like a fish far, far, far out of it’s waters. So far it could just as well be a fish that boarded a plane and landed onto the Sahara desert.

“Look”, Lance continued, his voice more sullen than before, “it’s totally cool if you don’t want to, and I’m sorry if I over-stepped my bounds. Hell, I just escaped a creepy guy, I don’t wanna sound anything like him myself. All I’m saying is, I owe you one, and if you want to, I’ll be more than happy to repay you.”

“You can even hit me up on social media if you want. I’m pretty much everywhere with my full name, Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, you name it. Or you can just hung up and we never speak again, that is totally cool too, and uh, thanks again for helping me out-“

Lance started rumbling, and something in Hunk just lit up, a small bold voice flexing and yelling at him to just do it, completely trampling the shyer, more worrisome voices nibbling at his mind.

“I’ll add you on Facebook. Or snapchat or something and we can uh, see and decide. I mean, are we even in the same city? Or the same country?! You could be in the other side of the world for all we know!” Hunk mused, suddenly realising all the ways this could go wrong. Even his little just do it voice had no come-back to that.

“I mean, your phone number’s nearly the same as my friend Steve’s, and it’s a local phone number so…probably not?”

Hunk stilled.Oh. Right.

They both laughed, slowly understanding how obscure the situation they found themselves in was.

“Alright. I’ll add you on facebook. I’ll talk to you there?”

Lance hummed, his smirk evident even through a phone conversation.

“Sure thing”, he smiled, and continued, “Nice to meet you, Hunk.”

His voice calling Hunk’s name felt more surreal than any conspiracy theory Pidge had ever brought his way.

“I-Nice to meet you too Lance.”

Hunk was hooked.This was a do-or-die moment, and he was pretty sure he just broke the do-or-die system.

*****

Lance’s squeal was loud enough to wake up his flatmate, if the knock on his door along with Keith’s rumble of ‘cut it out Sanchez’ was enough of an indication.

But he didn’t care, not right then and there.

He held his phone in his hand since the moment he clicked the hung up button after his conversation with Hunk, holding it tightly like prayer beads, as if that would make his wishes come true.

He waited for this blessed notification for over an hour, a cruel, agonising, torturous hour, and no, he was not being dramatic, or extra as his friends liked to call him, he was being dead-ass serious.

The moment Hunk uttered one single word to him, he felt the heat rise to his face, his heart thudding and threatening to jump out of his ribcage and run around the city to find the cause for it’s irregular beating.

His voice was like honey and cinnamon and spice and everything nice, dammit, Lance was no poet, but the way this boy talked and the way he laughed did things to his brain, things he was certain brains were not supposed to do, like agonise for an hour wether or not a stranger he knew for a total of five minutes would add him on any of his social media or not.

So when his phone beeped with a Facebook notification that spelled out ‘Hunk Garett has sent you a Friend Request’, Lance was not ashamed to admit he screamed louder than he did that one time he saw Justin Timberlake walking down the street.

With shaky hands, he unlocked his phone and clicked on the notification, the screen immediately loading Hunk’s Facebook Profile.

What awaited him was….it was too good to be true, that’s for sure.

The profile greeted him with a picture of the most beautiful boy in existence, a close up of his face, dark chocolate skin and amber eyes, and the sweetest, softest smile one could ever lay their eyes on.

His heart threatened to stop and he still had only looked at the guy’s profile picture.

He scrolled down, taking a look at his profile, which was set to public view.

Another photo awaited him, this time of the same gorgeous face, now placed in a full-body picture, that displayed Hunk sitting cross-legged in a grassy field, a big cheerful dog with golden fur and droopy ears trying to fit itself onto Hunk’s lap, the boy in question fitting his hands around the dog and hugging it, the biggest of grins on his face, enough to make his eyes squint and crinkle at the corners.

‘Did i adopt him or did he adopt me?’ the photo’s caption said, and Lance wasted no time in his next course of action.

He promptly got off of his bed, where he was squealing and agonising in for the past hour, and headed out to the living room, where Keith sat with a bowl of cereal in his lap, a weird alien documentary playing on the TV.

Lance sat by him and placed the phone in front of Keith’s face.

“Mothboy, what do you think of this guy?” he asked, making Keith squint and turn his attention to the phone in front of him.

Keith studied the picture as he took another spoonful of his cereal, humming before swallowing and turning to Lance.

“I don’t even know him and I’d willingly let him hug me to death.” he deadpanned.

“I know right?!” Lance screeched, and before he could re-think it, scrolled up on Hunk’s profile and clicked ‘accept’ on his friend request.

He had never been more thankful to his clumsy fingers for typing a wrong number more than he was in that very second.

*****The familiar ring of his phone made him shake his head and look away from the books in front of him, earning himself a glare from the tiny girl sitting across of him, although it was a short-lived one-her glare turned to a smirk in less than a nano-second.

“Is that the Snapchat notification sound I hear?” she smirked, raising an eyebrow and leaning closer to her friend.

“You got freakin’ bat ears Pidge, let me tell you”, Hunk grimaced, backing away from her stare  with his phone in hand, “And even if it was, what’s it to you again?”

“Nothing?” she blinked, morphing her expression to the purest most innocent face she could conjure, “I’m merely wondering who it is that’s snap-chatting you, that’s important enough for you to stop mid-way of studying quantum physics of all things, so you could answer.”

“That puppy face stopped working like, two years ago, and no, I’m not gonna tell you who I’m talking with.”

“Please, as if I don’t know it’s that Lance guy you keep going on and on about” she huffed, rolling her eyes in distaste.

Hunk  knew better than to try and argue with her on that-Pidge had been his best friend since forever, and if it’s one thing he could never do to her, it was lie.

Besides, he couldn’t ever lie to save his life, nevertheless lie to his best friend about anything.

“Okay yeah, it’s Lance, so?” he asked, not looking up from his phone as he opened the snapchat application and waited for Lance’s snap to load.

When did the two become so close?

It was only a month since that fated phone call, and yet they were talking more and more each day, to the point that Hunk sometimes forgot they hadn’t actually physically met yet.

“Hunk, my dude, my man”, she started, pushing her glasses up with the tip of her finger, “the guy is practically your boyfriend already.”

“No he’s-“

“Must I remind you your full 20-minute freak-out session when you found his Facebook? You said, and I quote” she paused, clearing her throat and turning to Hunk with wide eyes, “His eyes are so blue and sparkly how can a man be so pretty Pidge I am going to dIE” she sing-songed, mimicking her best Hunk voice.

“I definitely did not say that, and for the thousandth time, he is not my boyfriend! He’s just a-“

He meant to continue, but the loaded snapchat caught him mid-sentence, his mouth slack and turning into a soft fond smile.

The snap was of Lance, a quick selfie with a wink and a wide grin, the tip of Lance’s nose reddened as the sun beat down of him, the glimpse of ocean blue waves behind him, neck and chest bare and peeking into the photograph.

‘Water’s great! Wish you were here too xo’ said the caption and Hunk’s soul immediately transcended to the seventh gate of heaven, if that was even a thing-which it should, because only one was just not enough to contain how blessed he felt in that moment.

“He’s just so…pretty…”

“Called it” Pidge snorted, rolling back on her chair and folding her arms over her chest.

She let Hunk have his small blissed-out moment, even let him reply to Lance with a quick selfie that showcased him and the row of books on their table, Pidge pouting at them in the background, before she coughed and nodded at Hunk.

“Do you think he’s maybe…you know.” she nodded again, pointing to Hunk’s right arm, her point of interest hidden behind his t-shirt.

He looked down to his arm too, soft smile fading as he remembered what was hidden in the inner corner of his right arm, an image hidden from the world under bulky sweaters or light t-shirts.

“Do I think he’s my…soulmate?” he dreaded that last word, the thought itself bringing up bile and anxiety into his stomach.

Pidge nodded again, her face open and hands reaching out to rest in-between their piles of books and closer to Hunk.

“The only way to find out is if you meet him you know? You’re getting along so well already.” she prompted.

“I guess.” Hunk sighed and shook his head, averting his gaze in favour of grabbing his cup of coffee and taking a sip, then fiddling with the cover of one of his books.

Damn summer reading and extra work-load. He’d much rather be at the beach right now, enjoying his college years with a certain blue-eyed someone-

Okay. Wrong train of thought. Very, very, very wrong train of thought.

It wasn’t that Hunk hadn’t thought about it.Could Lance be his soulmate?

Yes.With the way his heart fluttered and stomach clenched with each joke or silly meme Lance sent him, with each quick ‘good morning’ text and short Skype sessions, it was no wonder he grew more and more fond of the bright-eyed boy with each passing day.

Hunk was in deep and he knew it.

But what if Lance just wasn’t his soulmate?

What if they met but there was no glow in their eyes, no burning of their respective marks and swirling colours that’d make each of their marks whole again?

He absent-mindedly scratched at his arm, the thought of that bright yellow circle etched onto his skin, waiting to find the colour it’d mix and match with, that’d make the colour that’d bind him to another person for life.

He already had an idea of who he wished that person to be.

He just didn’t know if fate would agree with him.

*****From: Hunky Hunk

>Hey Lance. I’m soooo sorry but i can’t make it today ;-; Jimmy got sick and i had to take her to the vet asap. raincheck?

Lance sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose before replying.

>>hey dude!! ya no problem, dont worry! hope jimmy feels better soon

The reply he got was instantaneous.

From: Hunky Hunk

>thanks man. will do. sorry again! i’ll make it up to you on your next day off :)

He smiled at the text, even though a certain disappointment gnawed at the pit of his chest.

He understood that life was hard and sometimes things just happened.

He just didn’t understand how life could work it’s way and destroy his plans five times in the same month.

The first time he asked Hunk if he wanted to meet up, was two months after they started talking, gathering up his courage and asking him out for that coffee he’d promised him.

Hunk sounded excited, but sent him a text the next day, profusely apologising because he’d forgotten to tell Lance he’d be out of town for the weekend.

Lance told him not to worry about it, they’d be able to figure out another day.

Then the next week it was his friend’s birthday, so they’d gone out to celebrate.

Then it was his workload that got Hunk slumped and unable to make it.

Then, surprisingly, it was Lance’s turn to be unavailable, his part time work friend getting sick and needing someone to fill his place for a few days, something that Lance wouldn’t ever say no to.

But this was the fifth time in a row that they tried making plans to meet up, and through he knew it was neither of their faults, it still felt like a blow to the side every time, his ego bruised and his hope battered.

He stared at the offensive blue mark on his left wrist and sighed in defeat.

Through their everyday talks with Hunk, the silly pictures and cute selfies he’d sent (that Lance had to fight off the urge to screenshot and keep by his bed every single time), to their common excitement and bonding over astronomy and flying, Lance had slowly started to get this inkling, this small hunch that maybe just maybe….

….There was perhaps a small, tiny, minuscule chance that Hunk could be his soulmate.

He tried not to get his hopes up, he really, truly did, but it became harder to do so with each sweet text and shy phone-call Hunk sent his way.The boy was sugar moulded into a human being and Lance wanted nothing more than to shove himself into a self-induced sugar coma. A Hunk coma, if you will.

He sighed, slumping onto his elbows on the kitchen table, earning a groan from Keith who was sitting across of him with his computer open and his pale skin reflecting the light off of it.

“What are you moping about?” he asked, his voice all bark but no bite. Lance learned by now that this was just his friend’s way of showing concern. “Is it about Hunk again?”

Lance’s lower lip quivered, his eyebrows scrunching.

“It’s the fifth time we’re unable to meet up Keith! The fifth time! Fate is against me and the universe hates me.”

“The universe is too busy minding its own business to hate you. And you and Hunk are practically dating anyway, stop being so sad about it.”

“But we’re not! I’m just-what if he’s not…the one, you know? What if I’m thinking things too much and he’s not even into me at all?!” Lance gasped, sitting up and bringing his hands to Keith’s shoulders, shaking the lethargic boy with intense emotion.

“What if he doesn’t even want to talk to me and he just feels forced to because he’s too sweet to say no?!”

“Lance, I get that you think the guy’s all sunshine and rainbows, and he probably is, but if he didn’t want to talk to you, I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t. It’s not that hard to block someone.” he sighed, moving away from Lance’s grip in favour of carrying on typing on his computer.

“…Besides,” Keith continued, peeking up from his work to look at Lance, “I met his best friend Pidge once and trust me, if he didn’t want to talk to you…she’d have obliterated you a long, long time ago.” he shuddered.

Lance slumped back in his seat, face thoughtful.

“That…is oddly comforting. Thanks buddy.”

Keith shrugged, tugging a strand of loose hair back into his messy ponytail.

“Also, your phone just beeped. I’ll take my best guess and say it’s from Hunk.”

Lance turned to face his phone. Sure enough, his Facebook messenger beeped with a new message, alerting him that Hunk had sent him an attachment.

“Conspiracy confirmed cryptid boy.” he smirked, ignoring Keith’s protest in favour of opening up the chat and looking at what Hunk had sent him.

Attached was a photo of Hunk’s dog Emmy, with half of Hunk’s face in the shot, standing right outside a veterinary clinic.

“Doc said she’ll be in perfect health soon! She just ate something bad. Gave her a hug and told her it’s from you and she wagged her tail a lot so that’s got to mean she likes you!” said the message that followed.

Lance let his phone back down and slumped face-first into the table, ignoring the cackle that came from Keith.

“You really like him huh.” Keith stated.

“…I would willingly eat a bottle of hot sauce for him in a heartbeat.” Lance answered.

The scariest part of the situation was that Lance really, truly meant it.

He was wrapped around the finger of a boy he’d never met before.

*****

Hunk felt his phone beep in his pocket, but for the first time in forever, didn’t move to check it, as much as his mind and heart screamed and begged him to.

He was late, he was so, so late and he’d never hear the end of it from Coran if he was late to his first lecture of the year.

He hadn’t even realised how fast summer came and left.Never realised how fast a certain boy named Lance sneaked his way into Hunk’s life even if he’d yet to see him face to face.

He pushed the thought aside in favour of speeding up his step, only pausing for a moment to take out his phone and promptly check the time.

7.30 a.m

Seven. Thirty. In the morning.

In his dazed state, he’d never realised he read the time wrong. The school was only a half hour away from his house, and thinking it was 8.30 when he woke up and his class was at 9.00, he had run the apartment upside down looking for clothes and his toothbrush so he could run out and into the first bus he could catch

But now it was seven thirty and he was five minutes away from the school campus and he honestly never hated himself as much as he did right then and there.

Luckily that hate wouldn’t stand for long-he noticed a local coffee shop across the street, already busy with people shuffling in and out despite the early hour of the morning.

Hunk rushed inside, placing his order to a cheerful yet tired-looking cashier, then moving to the queue waiting for their coffee, his eyes never leaving his phone as he checked through his to-do list and replying to Lance’s text from last night, figuring the boy must’ve been still asleep when he got no reply.

“One cold brew coffee with caramel syrup and soy milk?” the cashier all but yawned, and Hunk turned his head to her with a smile, reaching for the coffee she’d just placed onto the small waiting table.

He stilled when he felt a warm hand clash with his, tan slender fingers with a blue circle on the wrist of said hand.

His eyes widened when the circle glowed, and swirled, his own mark heating up and his eyes burning, the blues and yellows merging into a vibrant green.

There was no need to look up, to realise who it was he’d just felt this connection to.

He’d known from the first time they talked.From that very first, awkward, embarrassing phone call.

Yet he still looked anyway, if anything, just to see the face he could wait not longer to kiss the smirk off of.

“Morning Lance.” he beamed, noticing the green glow subduing from Lance’s eyes, replaced with the baby blues he loved to finally see up close, the smile on Lance’s face too surreal to even try and describe.

“Morning hunky Hunk.” Lance grinned, “glad to finally know what your taste in coffee’s like.” he added with a wink, and before Hunk could reply, he got his arms full of Lance, the scent of sea salt and comfort and home.

It felt right.

It felt stupid to even question it, to ever wonder if this was his person.

Hunk looked down at the boy in his arms, a lip-splitting grin of his own lacing his face, burying himself into Lance’s neck.

“I guess I can finally treat you to that coffee I owed you?” Lance laughed, the warmth vibrating off his neck and onto Hunk.

Hunk huffed, his eyes already watering before Lance leaned closer and kissed his forehead.

“Idiot” Hunk whispered, “You’ve got a lifetime to do that.”

******

-Support me on Ko-Fi-

[fatalis-writes]

That Detailed Post About How I Met Michael Rooker And Sean Gunn And We Talked About Sexbots

You guys seem interested in how my weekend went (I’ll only focus on the Actually Exciting parts, aka Rooker and Gunn so I don’t bore you with my life lol) and I’m still reeling from how this might have been the most fun I’ve had at a small (ish, sort of, maybe I just think of it as small because it’s local for me) con, so I’m going to ahead and writing a big old post about it. So strap in, because this might not actually make any sense since this is the first chance I’ve had to breathe in like two days. (Also notice that my wifi is on!)

So rewind to like a week and a half ago. I’ve been planning on going to this con for a while since it’s close to me and I’ve been going for the past few years, so it’s sort of a situation where if I have the weekend free, I just show up (I cosplay a LOT so I go to tons of cons mostly to just hang out with people). I can’t remember the guest list at all and I don’t really care, because the people I CAN remember are from things I don’t really watch/read/whatever, so I’m planning on just going and hanging out and maybe shopping. I’m planning on just going for Saturday, and wearing a Star Wars thing. 

WELL. 

After seeing vol 2 a *few* times, I’m like okay, yeah, I think I especially love Michael Rooker now. So I follow him on facebook and twitter and instagram, and “related events” things start coming up as things that he’s going to, you know, to advertise, and I see THAT CON. So now I’m like....???????? Excuse me???? So I checked and yep, he’s right there on the guest list, and I’m an idiot who doesn’t actually pay attention to anything. So now I’m like well, shit...what do I even wear to see him? Because I HAVE to at least meet him, and I just CAN’T do that in a Star Wars cosplay. And then I realize that I’ve been putting some stuff together for Gamora ever since I saw vol 2 the first time, and I’ve got a wig and paint on the way (and this isn’t a big deal, because paint is kind of my thing, so I’m like yeah okay I can just throw this together the day of and probably things will not go wrong). But a week is not enough time for me to put together any of her canon outfits, especially because I really want time to make them nice. So I pull out a pair of black pants, a white tank, and a leather jacket from my closet and it’s like...okay, whatever, here we are, this is fine. So then I bought myself a little baby Groot with a Ravager jacket because I needed some kind of SOMETHING to carry around, and didn’t have time to make a sword or gun or anything (he was a hit by the way).

Then late last week I get the vol 2 art book and I’m super excited because of all the Iron Lotus girls in it and I’ve been super needing exactly that because I’m going to be making one over the summer so I’ve been STRUGGLING to find refs. So now I have refs...and a centerfold of a sexbot. So now I have exactly what I need Michael Rooker and Sean Gunn to sign. (Spoiler, they did. I will post it).

Now fast forward to yesterday, which was Saturday of the con. I’m in a Star Wars cosplay because folks were expecting that and it felt wrong to back out of it so soon before the con, and it was SUCH a struggle forcing myself not to go up for autographs because i HAVE TO WAIT until I’m wearing Gamora. BUT, they did a panel, which I waited an hour and a half in line for and sat just behind the VIP rows which was pretty good. And let me tell you, that might have been the best panel I have ever been to in my life, and I’ve been doing this for like 6 years now. 

Sean Gunn (who plays Kraglin and also did the onset Rocket where he wore a green morph suit and crept around on all fours, I saw a print of it at his booth, it’s absolutely incredible) was there right on time, and Michael Rooker was late, so we got like 20 minutes of what he just called “coherency” where he did the q & a by himself. Memorable points include:

The first song on Kraglin’s awesome mix would be Jukebox Hero by Foreigner. He said this immediately, with no hesitation at all, so he’s definitely been thinking about it. 

Sean’s favorite non-gotg MCU character is the Silver Surfer

He doesn’t know how much of his own whistling at the end of the movie was actually used and how much was just edited in, but he is an amateur whistler and he’s just started, so give him a break, okay??

They played around with a LOT of ideas about what kind of a character Kraglin should be. Originally he was supposed to cackle a LOT

On Gilmore Girls he was constantly afraid that he would be out of a job, because his character was never supposed to be recurring 

Michael Rooker is the world’s biggest Gilmore Girls fan

Then Rooker finally snuck in, and stood behind Sean to get everyone to cheer for Sean, and then the HOLLERING

THIS MAN IS LOUD AND I LOVE HIM 

His greeting was I’M MARY POPPINS, Y’ALL

He is, in fact, the world’s biggest Gilmore Girls fan

If he could play any other GOTG character it would be Kraglin, and again, this was said without any hesitation (Sean said he would play Yondu, because the guy who plays him SUCKS, which Rooker agreed with)

They went to the same film school

Michael Rooker says he can walk down any street anywhere and talk to ANYONE and make friends

His favorite line from GOTG 2 is “my underwears” because it isn’t underWEAR, it’s underWEARS 

He just says whatever pops into his head at the time and goes with it

He likes to believe that Yondu turned into stardust and went to another galaxy to kick some more ass 

Then there were still a lot more questions to get through, so they had to lightning round it, in which Rooker jumped up and walked down the middle aisle, put his mic in the face of whoever was next in line to ask a question, and answered YES to every single one

“How was it to work with Stallone again after--” YES

“What’s it like to--” YES

And then they went back to their tables and I didn’t see them again until Sunday (today). I spent like 45 minutes speed-painting myself, used my bf’s shirt as an umbrella in a torrential downpour, and managed to remember both my art book and Groot, and I got my ass in line to see Rooker and this was the most rewarding day of my life. I think I had to wait like 20 minutes, but I paid for a photo and an autograph, and when I pulled the book out everybody working at the table was super interested because like nobody (except Michael Rooker????) knew that it exists, so while I was up there everybody was just flipping through it and that was cool and all but my heart was going like 70 mph 

And then,,,,,,,it’s my turn, and I get a big ol HI, SWEETHEART (and for those of you who don’t know from anything else he’s done, he does sound exactly like Yondu, like that’s just default Rooker) and I’m just kind of hi :D and he said i looked good,,, and then he saw that I wanted him to sign the centerfold and he was pretty Happy with that and was like “Where should I sign?? OH, RIGHT HERE” at her entire pelvic/upper thigh region

Which is indeed where he signed it 

And he wrote YONDU WAS HERE

And then he was like “Oh yeah, i love this book, this is a good book” so we flipped through it some and it was A+ High Quality Content

ANd then he had to stand up for the photo because it was one of those deals of the security or staff guy on hand just takes one with your phone, which is a LOT cheaper than doing the official photo ops and tbh sometimes the phone ones come out a lot better, and you can actually talk to him which is neat. So he stands up, and he’s like ‘alright, c’mere baby’ and i’m like :D again 

and he put his arm around me which was A++++ 

And he rubbed my back which was like,, the BEST

And he was SO NICE

And he said sweetheart like 17 times 

And he’s just SUPER FRIENDLY and so easy to talk to so overall 10/10 will repeat this experience 

Then I was like okie doke, time for Sean Gunn, so I went over to his booth and stood in line and because EVERYBODY wants to see Yondu but less people want to see Kraglin it was a lot shorter and I could talk to him longer, so he signed the same centerfold and we went through the ‘where tf to put it’ struggle because Rooker took up the Good Spot, so now I’ve got KRAGLIN next to it, but he also hadn’t seen the book so we got to flip through it and talk. And I told him that I got it because I needed refs of the girls, and he was like wait why? and i was like well,, cosplay,, and he was SUPER interested in that so we talked about how I’m planning on making a sexbot cosplay (to go with a Yondu, that’s a long and different story but I’m Very Excited because he’s a Very Good Yondu) and then Sean asked what the girls are credited as, because on set they called them Sexbots, so uh, CONFIRMED. I told him that I’ve also been calling them sexbots, but they’re in the book as ‘lovebots’ which is just you know, the same fucking thing but family friendly

So he’s interested in my cosplay, and everything was fantastic, and also a lot of little kids really liked my Gamora, and also I got a free print out of it

And everybody loved Baby Groot

So it was a really good day

(if you want to see the centerfold and also the Me then I’ll post them)

[randomprose]

How do you think Sakura & Sasuke from SA would act like when they're a couple at a theme park like Six Flags? I went last weekend for the 1st time & this one couple kept showing up @ the same rides as us. The girl kept saying she was brave enough to ride the front car & then once the "click" of the bar sounded she'd whisper "I immediately regret the decision that led me to this point". The guy just would shade her in line with his body/make jokes @ the photos taken of his friend during rides.

Sorry but I couldn’t fit my whole message! But that couple just kept reminding me of Sakura and Sasuke from your fic. The bf kept being snarky in a joking way and the gf was quirky with her “I can handle any ride but maybe not” attitude. Plus their friend was basically the equivalent of how Naruto is with ramen but with orange chicken from Panda Express.

anon, you don’t know how happy you made me for thinking about my silly little fic while you’re in Six Flags (i mean. you’re in Six Flags!! seriously. are you kidding me?? aahhh!!)

so, here. have a fic of how I think SS will be like in an amusement park ft. Naruto.

(also, check out my other Strange Attractions outtakes)

“We don’t have to ride itif you don’t want to, Sakura.”

“Shut up! Who said I’m toochicken shit for this? I can fucking ride it just fine!”

“I didn’t say you weretoo—oh, for fucks sakes.”

Sasuke rolled his eyes asSakura left to line up on the biggest roller coaster at The Hidden Leaf AmusementPark. The line was long and the heat is unbearable and Sasuke is regrettingever suggesting going in this godforsaken place for Sakura’s birthday in thefirst place.

The decision was somethingsimple enough—and incredibly stupid now that Sasuke looks back on it—when he remembereda conversation where Sakura mentioned in passing that she’s never been to anamusement park before. Like, what normal young adult has never even been on acarousel ride before? And Sakura always thought Sasuke’s childhood was sad.

So, when March 28throlled in, Sasuke marched himself at Sakura’s apartment at the ungodly hour of7am, brandished two tickets to THLAP and told her to “Get dressed. I’m givingyou the best gift in the history of humankind.”

Sakura, glaring up at himbleary eyed and with an impressive bed hair in tattered pajamas, croaked out,“And what the hell would that be?”

“A fucking childhood.”

Right as they were walkingto Sasuke’s car Naruto came bounding up the lobby and when he heard it wasSakura’s birthday and they were going to the park insisted he come alongbecause “Two is hardly enough for a birthday bash but three is a party!”despite Sasuke’s glare and his dark mumble of “No, three is a fucking crowd.”

And so here they are, inline at the biggest and scariest ride in the park, The Hokage. It has threegigantic loops, a zigzagging trail with a 98% chance of the riders gettingflung off the ride, three twisted rails guaranteed to make you fear for yourlife and make it flash right before your very eyes as you plunge to your deathof a 500 feet vertical drop with a speed of 250km per hour in four seconds. Thefirst time Sasuke rode it was the day he felt what real unadulterated fear wasand was the loudest and longest he’s ever screamed in his life.

Sakura is practicallyvibrating beside him. He’s not sure if it’s the nerves or she’s finallyrealized she doesn’t want to actually live anymore and is excited to cross theafterlife. The bright look on her face and the nail biting is a great contrast.Then again, the look on her face is just a tad too bright bordering on panic.

And because Sasuke is alittle shit he decides to make things more interesting.

“Can’t be helped then,” hesighs. “Alright, Sakura. Since it’s your birthday I’ll let you hold my hand onthe ride.”

That got her attentionenough to stop biting her nails and turn a glare at Sasuke.

“Excuse me? You’ll let me hold your hand? Oh, gee, Sasuke.How considerate of you. You’re practically a saint. I don’t think I deservesuch generosity.”

“Mm. I know. And because I’mso generous, as an added bonus I won’t even tell anyone you screamed bloodymurder all throughout the ride and begged to get off. Total silence. I swear.”

Sakura’s glare just uppedand if looks could kill Sasuke would be six feet under by now. He keeps himselffrom laughing aloud at the sight.

“Who says I need to holdyour hand? Who says I need to hold anyone’s hand? And hell yeah I’ll scream!But it’ll be because I’m having the time and the thrill of my life!”

“Thrill of your life myass. Look at you. You’re pale, shaking, and you’ve bitten your nails to hell.”

“Shut up, Sasuke! I bet you cried when you first rode this hellcar. Knowing you, maybe even puked your guts out.”

Sasuke gave her an amused lookthat screamed ‘Really? Me?’ before he scoffed, smirking as he rolled his eyes.

“Whatever, you crazy harpy.Offer still stands.” He said placating and in a tone that suggests he’s havingway too much fun at her expense. “I won’t say anything—not even if you cry.”

Sakura’s eyes widened asher nostrils flared. Sasuke had successfully poked the sleeping dragon awake.

“Alright. That’s it. We’reriding at the front fucking car.”

Ten minutes later foundthem at the front of the line but Sakura insisted on going on the next one sothey could sit at the front. The ride operator just looked at them, rolled his eyes,and mumbled “Thrill-seekers” under his breathe but allowed them nonetheless.

When it was their turn,Sakura tugged at Sasuke’s wrist and hurriedly got on. The operator rambled onthe usual safety precautions but it all went over her head as she stared downat The Hokage’s trail and it became clear to her that this is how she’s goingto die.

“I’m regretting any and alldecisions I have made in my life that led me to this point.”

“You can still hold my handif you want.”

“Shut up, Sasuke! Youstupid—“ was the last words she said before it morphed into the shrillest andmost blood curdling scream Sasuke has ever heard.

—

Naruto found them slumpedon a bench half an hour later.

Well, Sasuke was slumpedbent over his knees. Sakura was happily munching on cotton candy and sippingcola.

“Where the fuck were you?”Sasuke said as soon as Naruto came bounding up to them.

“Gorging myself with thegenius creation that’s fried ramen.” He turned to Sakura who offered him someof her cotton candy. “Fried fucking ramen,Sakura! Can you fucking believe it?! Ramen you can actually eat while walkingwithout worrying about spilling broth! What a time to be alive!”

“Carnival food sure is…interesting,huh?”

“You bet!”

“Interestingly disgusting.”

“Shut up, Sasuke.” Narutosaid whilst cramming more cotton candy in his mouth. “Yo, what did you guys dowhile I was away? Let’s head towards the games sections next.”

“We went to ride TheHokage. It was the most thrill I’ve ever had in my life. I screamed a lot.” Sakurasaid as they walked towards the game stands. Sasuke muttered “Yeah you did” andSakura elbowed him lightly on the ribs. “Sasuke let me hold his hand because he’s so nice. I thought I was gonna die.It was awesome.”

“Right?! Oh, man that’s myfavorite ride ever!” He took another pinch at Sakura’s cotton candy. “Wait.Sasuke let you hold his hand or you lethim hold your hand?”

Sakura laughed and Narutoleaped out of the way as Sasuke attempted to swipe at him.

“Say, did you know? Sasukepuked and cried the first time we rode The Hokage. Man, that day is still oneof the best days of my life.”

There was a pause in whichthey all stopped walking, Naruto a few paces ahead, before Sakura turnedgleeful maniacal eyes at Sasuke and Sasuke turned to Naruto with a look ofmurder.

“I fucking knew it!”

“Naruto, you’re dead!”

[generdway]

all the evens?

thats gonna take a while but sure!

200: My crush’s name is: tay198: I am really: alright at the moment196: My eye color is: black194: My ring size is: i dont know 192: I am allergic to: nothing190: My 1st job was: never had one... yet188: My bed is: comfy186: My best friend: tay184: Xbox or ps3: none182: In my pockets:i have none, please fix this180: Marriage is: aight178: My mom: ://176: Last YouTube video watched: Running in the 90s174: Do you have any siblings? yes172: Are you taller than your mom? yes170: What did you do yesterday? talked to my bf[ I Believe In ]168: Luck: yea166: Yourself: no164: Heaven: dunno162: God: yea160: Soul mates: yea158: Gay Marriage:yea156: Orbs: ???????????[ This or That ]154: Hugs or Kisses: both, i cant give up any of them152: Phone or Online: online151: Red heads or Black haired:150: Blondes or Brunettes: blond148: Summer or winter: winter146: Chocolate or vanilla: chocolate144: Oranges or Apples: orange142: McDonalds or Burger King: BK140: Mac or PC: PC

138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: ugly and rich bc at least then i have money to give away 

136: Hillary or Obama: obama???? why is this a question lmao134: Singing or Dancing: singing132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: who130: Wal-Mart or Target: target128: Manicure or Pedicure: manicure126: Your Birthday or Christmas: christmas 124: Disney or Six Flags: disney

[ Here’s What I Think About ]122: War: bad120: Gay Marriage: awesome119: The presidential election:118: Abortion: womans choice116: Reality TV: shit114: Back stabbers: worst112: Facebook: meh110: My Neighbors: dont know em108: Designer Clothes: decent i guess 106: Sports: im not straight104: The future: bulletproof[ Last time I ]102: Last time you ate: few hours ago100: Cried in front of someone: few weeks ago98: Took a vacation: months ago96: Changed a diaper: never94: Went to a wedding: 3 years ago92: Got a peircing: when i was like 6 months old90: Texted: a few days ago[ MISC ]88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: food86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: tay84: People call me: sweta82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: no80: The first person i talked to today was: tay78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: tay76: Right now I am talking to: tay74: I have/will get a job: i’ll get a job72: Today: alright70: Next Weekend: party68: The worst sound in the world: jotaro dying66: People that make you happy: tay64: My friends are: nice amazing people62: My School: white60: I lose all respect for people who: voted trump :^)))))))58: Your hair color is: black 56: Favorite web site: youtube i guess54: The worst pain I was ever in was: im always in pain52: My room is: clean50: Where would you like to be: tays room48: Ever been in love: yea46: More guy friends or girl friends: guy44: One person that you wish you could see right now: tay42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: somewhat40: Last person I got mad at: my mom38: I wish I was a professional: artist[ My Favorites ]36: Vehicle: AE86 Sprinter Trueno34: State visited: New York32: Athlete: Serena Williams30: Actress: I dont watch movies but the person who played WW28: Band: fuck you 26: Grocery store: ???????????????24: Movie: Aladdin22: Animal: i dont know20: Holiday: Halloween18: Sport to play: swimming16: Book: who knows14: Beach: none12: Thing to cook: egg10: Restaurant: chipotle8: Yankee candle scent: the pink one6: Flower: lilac4: Talk show host: none2: Dog breed: all1: Did you answer all these truthfully?

[itsheavenlytobewithyou]

speaking with my crush via tumblr bc noone will ever read it

I am confused. Yes, that’s the fucking right word, I am hella confused and I don’t know a single way out of this confusion. You know, I’ve known your name and your face for about a year and a half now and I’ve never been attracted to you in any way. I’ve never had the desire to talk to you, to meet you nor to fucking kiss you.

Things have changed about five weeks ago. My best friend (no, not even my best friend - my sister, my soulmate, my hella better half) told me she has a crush on you. I was fine with it, I was happy for her, just like me she hasn’t had a crush on someone for ages, I was glad she found something who has a special place in her heart. I mean, I am her best friend. Of course I was happy. During that time I already wished I had a crush on someone. I mean, there weren’t any boys in my surroundings that I fancied, I’ve known a lot of boys who I found handsome and funny and stuff, but there was nobody who I felt attracted to.

That monday, when my better half told me she had a crush on you, it changed. First I was like “She’s right, he is really cute and funny and handsome! Why have I never thought about him like that?” But that thought happened really quickly, a couple minutes after she’d told me, and it also vanished quickly. Everything seemed nice - I mean, she’s finally had a crush on someone, I was a single pringle like my whole life (I told myself on a regular basis that that‘s alright, but deep inside myself I knew I wasn‘t alright with that and I knew that I hated being alone) and we were both alright with the situation. In the evening, when I was laying in my bed, I let that thought go through my head again. I thought about you. How funny and handsome and hot you actually were. And I asked myself why the heck didn’t I think about you first. I was pretty damn late to realize that YOU were a possible crush for me. The point was, we’ve never had any close contact or were talking for longer than a few minutes. I’ve never had any chance to realize how great you were. But yeah, my soul sister had a crush on you, and she was in your class! So absolutely no way for me. We never talked or saw each other, so there was no way I’ll be standing in her way! She told me first, she had daily contact with you and you and me, we barely saw each other, so no way! And yes, now comes the gigantic BUT. But, I realized something. The musical was coming. I was going to spend a whole bloody week 12 hours every day in contact with you. And my best friend was not going to see you, because we always were in the theatre.

I was fucked.

The shit began on friday. 3 days left before the great damn musical week. I’ve had a dance rehearsal at your school in the 2nd hour. And of course, because I was at your school, which is also my bf’s school, I was going to spend my break with her. So I met her in front of her classroom at break. 4 days had passed since she told me she had a crush on you, so I’ve had 4 days to process that. During the break we sat on the bench in the school’s hallway. She told me she was going to kill me if I told anyone she had a crush on you. Of course I wasn’t; I mean I didn’t even know who to tell that. She told me that she was going to miss you because she wouldn’t see you. I told her jokingly that I was going to take a lot of stalker pics of you for her and apologized several times that I would spend so much time with you - even if that wasn’t my fault; but I just did it, she is a sensitive person and easily hurt sometimes.

Well, the break was over and I knew I was gonna see you now. It was for the first time in a couple months or something. And fuck, you completely blew my mind.

We were playing the whole play and I saw you acting and singing your songs for the first time. And it blew me away. First things first, because I haven’t seen you in ages I didn’t realize you’ve grown your hair so much that it hung onto your forehead. And I didn’t realize before how aching good it looked. I am a lover of long hair and you, as the killer, absolutely rocked it. And how good you played your role. How good you played the fucking psycho killer. And how nicely you sang. I spent almost three hours of my day just looking at you and asking myself how the heck I didn’t see your talent and handsomeness first.

Of course I took pictures and audio messages for my best friend. But after a couple snaps I realized I wasn’t doing it for her. I was doing it for myself. (that sounds so creepy by the way, what the fuck.)

I spent the whole weekend thinking about you, telling myself not to develop a crush on you, not to think about you the whole time, but I fucking failed. I was constantly cursing myself and was anxious about the following week. I was anxious about developing a further crush on you and I fucking KNEW I was, ‘cause what else would I’ve been doing when I saw you the whole hella day.

And so came monday and with it the musical week. I went to the city theatre with the thought “alright Lilly. He’s already reserved for your best friend. He’s hers. Don’t stand in her way. He’s funny and talented and all, but don’t fall in love with him. Okay? Okay.” And what was the first thing I saw when I opened the frickin’ door of the theatre? Main actors and dance group: changing room downstairs. I was going to share a fucking changing room with you for six days in a row. wOT THE HECC YES THANKS MS. KILLI FOR THAT AWESOME IDEA AW COME ON FUCK OFF EVERYONE. That‘s what I thought, but I wasn‘t being honest. Even in my thoughts I wasn‘t being honest with myself – of course I was insanely happy to share the changing room with you, bloody hell. And I went downstairs, greeted everyone like a normal person does and scanned that quite small changing room for you. I didn’t even do it on purpose. My eyes were scanning that room for you without me thinking about it. But you weren’t already there, so I just went and dropped my stuff on a chair and in the closet next to the heating and the window bench, because there was free space and it was cozily warm.

And as destiny wanted it - when you came into the room, you just went and stuffed all your things exactly next to mine. Your tuxedo, your bow tie, your shirt, your shoes. You even layed down your hair wax and your frickin’ eau de toilette on the window bench that I first called mine. And I wasn’t even angry. I was something between cAN YOU NOT and omg let me smell it holy shit.

And as monday passed, also the time I spent with you passed. I could watch you acting again. I could shake my head unbelievingly again. Even though I did not want it, you began to have an aura that pulled me like a magnet. (which is most likely the first symptom of falling in love with someone.) I always had that frickin’ excuse in the back of my head that told me I was just observing you so that I could tell my best friend everything about you. But I could not move my eyes off you because of me.

I am a pretty good actor, you know. I don’t wanna sound selfish, but I also play theatre and I think I’m quite good at pulling a fake face. I also don’t blush very easily. That made it very easy for me to conceal my feelings - in front of you, the others, my best friend, even myself.

On monday noon, when the first 6 hours with you had passed and I went to have lunch with my bf as usual, I acted in front of her. That’s something I usually NEVER do. She is the one person in my life with whom I can be myself. I’m comfortable with her, I tell her everything, I am myself with her. On that day, I wasn’t.

Of course I told her everything about the musical. How the rehearsals were going, how the venue was, what you were doing. I blurted out everything about you, told her every single detail, told her how incredibly good you acted. I couldn’t stop talking about you. But I always acted like I was telling her all about you for her. So that she’d miss you less. But I was just trying to process all the feelings that had accumulated inside of me. She was just the ventile for my inner frustration about how much I liked you. And as I had to walk back to the theatre because rehearsals continued, I kept on going with the fucking excuse to get near you just because of her.

Time passed, and with time my feelings for you grew. You made me smile, you made me laugh, and not just me, you made everyone laugh. You were such a bunch of happiness and good mood for everyone, I just couldn’t stand it. You’ve always had a good answer, a funny joke, or just when you were laughing and showing your bright smile, my heart was beating fast inside my chest and I didn’t even realize it. My crush on you grew with every single second I stood around you and my mind was still completely like “you are just fancying him, chill down.” I hella wasn’t.

On tuesday afternoon, it happened. General rehearsal. And what means general rehearsal? Right, everyone needs to wear their costumes. And what means wearing costumes? You getting changed right in front of my eyes. At first I didn’t even realize it. I was changing into my first outfit and everyone was casually talking to each other, like we always did, and than you just randomly pulled down your pants and kept talking to everyone, with just your boxers on. And I stood right next to you.

My first thought was like “omgomgomg stop looking lilly stop hella looking just grab your own shirt or something fuckfuckfuck”. I still remember how everything inside me just went cold, but I kept having that casual conversation with you and the others while fixing my leggings or something, pulling my cool face as if there was nothing. But inside me everything went like “fuckfuckfuck don’t look”. Instead I said something to you. Just as I was thinking I’d have to make small talk with you while you were fucking changing yourself. My pulse went down a little when you put on pants again. But a few seconds after you PULLED OFF YOUR SHIRT and my heart began beating heavily in my chest again as you casually replied to me, looked me in the face and smiled while I was replying again. The only thought that shot through my head was “fucking look him into the eyes when he’s talking to you.” Of course I first did - but then my look casually swiped over your tanned sixpack and I could hit myself with a car for doing that. After you put your shirt on, I was quite proud of myself for acting as if I was completely chilled and cool with you half naked in front of me while talking to me. I did quite a good job.

But the costume hell didn’t end with that, nope. Afterwards you put on your snow white shirt and your red necktie. And fuck, you looked so incredibly good. I was constantly reminding myself not to stare too hard, especially during the play where a lot of other people could bust me staring at you like a creep. Sometimes I was absendmindedly staring at you while you were on stage and I had to remind myself not to keep staring like every five minutes.

But I couldn’t stop looking at you. And with every single play you played better! Your actings skills got better and better with each fucking time you transformed into that psycho killer. Every time you shouted “Na ich!” while stepping forward to shock everyone, you played it a little better. And of course I always wanted to watch you play. If I didn’t have to be on stage or to change myself into the next outfit I’d stand behind the stage and watch you play. Sometimes I didn’t even pay attention to the play; I just watched you and was a little obnoxious about someone realizing that I fancied you ways too much.

I also busted myself always rambling during the last scene of the play to anyone who was standing right next to me behind the stage “oh my GOD, he plays so well, holy shit he gets better each fucking time”, but always keeping chilled, as if I was just casually observing your actings skills and appreciating how well you played, but my inner me was just like: “fuck he plays so good omg fuck”

And so the hours passed! Until wednesday I was still trying to convince myself that I was just fancying you, but deep inside myself I knew that there was something bigger. Especially during these god damn jam sessions.

Oh my God, the jamsessions. I didn’t know you played the guitar that well. Or the e-guitar. And while we were singing and dancing and having fun and you were playing the guitar, my heart was freaking out. Dude, I love to watch you play the guitar. I’ve had SO much fun during the jamsessions; and I loved to casually chill in the orchestra room and to listen to you playing the guitar. I admired you so badly. I frickin loved it. And sometimes when I was again staring absendmindedly at you while you were playing it and you looked back at me for a fraction of a second, my heart stopped for a second.

Or all the times we were in our changing room, you just grabbed Phillipp’s guitar and played something. Of course I always took pics and audio messages. But they were just for my bf, not for myself! Well, that’s what I told myself. That musical week was just one whole fucking lie to myself. And it was the best week of the whole school year as well. You don’t know how much I love to watch you sing and play the guitar.

It was on wednesday, when I started being honest to myself. I realized that I liked you ways more than I should. I mean I kinda knew I was about to develop a huge crush on you, but there was that other voice shouting in my head: “nooo, you’re just fancying him! This is over sooner than you think” but boi - you didn’t make it easy for me. So I told myself that I had to tell it my best friend. ‘Cause if I didn’t, I felt like I’d lie to her, and I really didn’t wanna do that. So - on wednesday afternoon after the first play on wednesday morning I texted it to my bf. And of course, she was shocked, which was nothing but logic. And I told her that I wouldn’t stand in her way, that you were hers, etc.

But again, I was lying. I wanted you. I wanted you for myself, I was jealous of her, I was being selfish. I was selfishly thinking about a way I could possibly make you like me until saturday - ‘cause after saturday we wouldn’t see each other regularly. I still want you, by the way.

I was so worried! I was so damn worried that she would be angry of me. For not telling her, for telling her, for just falling in love with you. I love her so much, you know, but sometimes she is just kinda being unfair... and doesn’t understand certain things. But, for my own luck, she wasn’t. Cause I lied to her! I wanted you, but I didn’t act like it. I hate myself for lying at her so badly. I was already pretty damn deep into you, also if I didn’t admit it. I was too dang deep into you.

On wednesday evening, I tried again to stay away from you. But you were literally everywhere. And even though I didn’t want or realize it, I was searching for your closeness. I hung around where you were around. I chose to sneak around in the make-up room even though I wasn’t allowed to, just because you were in it. And all of that - without wanting it. During the play I wanted to distract myself - and I’ve talked to Anna Königsrainer about her crush as well, so I decided to listen to her problems instead of sticking around with mines.

So, she and me went up to the second floor of the theatre in a room where we were completely alone, because we just wanted to talk for ourselves. So I listened to her problems and tried to help her. I also mentioned that I had a crush on you - just casually, and I didn’t expect much help from her, which I also didn’t really get - but I can’t blame her. She was ways more freakishly in love than I was. And I don’t like talking about my problems to others. I normally don’t open myself to other people, because I am better off with my own problems. But it felt good to tell it someone besides my best friend. I trusted her, and I felt better after that. Because I knew she’s also had a more or less hopeless crush on someone, so I felt not that alone and fucked. And her hug made me feel better again.

Thursday passed as all the other days, we did jamsessions, I tried to follow and avoid you in the same time and your acting got better again. On wednesday evening you had that bag of apples with you and you gave them to everyone, which was so cute! I think it was on thursday when you first crashed that champagne glass on the floor with your foot! And when you did that, you blew me away again. I just- I was StRUGGLING— You as a psycho killer always reminded me of my best friend, because she does these really cool video edits with a psycho killer. And, because she hadn’t seen you play yet, she was gonna love it.

And I also freakin loved it. I gotta be honest, you are hot as hell when being a psycho. And when you stepped on that bloody glass, I was just blown away. AGAIN. You made that so frickin’ good, I- I just can not describe it. And again, I rambled with everyone about how much I loved it and of course I was telling my best friend all about it and Jesus Christ, I kinda felt like that was the final puzzle piece that made me realize I had fallen for you.

And after the evening play on thursday I needed a lift to take me home. Lucky me that I live in Lana just like you, so just did it and asked you if I could drive home with you. And lucky me, you said yes.

My inner me was still processing that I was spending a small period of time really close to you (and I mean we were almost alone, I didn’t care that Valentin was with us; I was even a little happy about it, I mean I would’ve probably been ways too nervous if I was just with you and I wouldn’t be able to talk to you normally, so I was quite relieved we weren’t absolutely alone). So we chilled in front of the shoe shop and talked and chatted and rambled about random stuff, also during the car drive. And during the drive it was just the two of us that were talking - besides your dad that said a few sentences a couple times. But in like 90% of that drive it was just the two of us chatting, cause Valentin didn’t even say something anymore because he was tired - and, thanks to my quite good acting skills, I managed to talk to you normally. Thanks God.

But I was so happy during these 20 minutes, you can’t imagine that! We chatted about the musical, still happy about how good the play went and you were so nice to me. That was like the first time ever we had a proper conversation, and my heart was like freaking out. You were so cute and funny and I was so happy about that small casual conversation that we had… and after I’ve jumped out of the car, thanked your dad and greeted you, there was the moment I first said to myself: Shit Lilly. That’s a gigantic mess you’ve made. When I’ve walked back home after that drive I realized: I had fallen in love with the same guy as my best friend and I could NOT be together with him. I mean, if she hadn’t fallen in love with you, maybe I had a tiny chance. It was tiny, but it was a chance. And what if you’d also fall in love with me? We couldn’t be together anyways. My best friend would despise me! I mean, she is incredibly unforgiving. My friendship with her would be ruined, and I was an absolute devotee of “sister before mister”, so in any way I would choose her over you! But deep inside myself, in the depths of my feelings I usually never listen to, I wanted to choose you over her. She’s had so many relationships with guys in her life, I never even had one, but if I had the chance to get in a relationship with you, I kinda have the feeling that she’d not acccept it. She wouldn’t understand it. She would want you for herself - which is logic, but - I would give up any guy at any time for her. But I am not sure that she’d also do that for me.

After I’ve excitedly texted Anna everything about that drive and went to bed, I let my brain process the whole day. About half an hour ago, when we were waiting for your dad to pick us up, Irina came to us, we talked about where she lived, and when she told us her address, you said that your ex was also living there. That made me think a little. I mean - first, I was still naively thinking that you could perhaaaps like me also more than the other girls. But I also quickly realized, there were about 60 other girls around me. You could have anyone. So why would I be the lucky one that you’d choose? And plus, your ex was the one who ended your relationship, so it was still possible you had feelings for her. I mean, you were talking about her - even though it was just by mentioning where she lived - but still. That thought dropped me a little from cloud nine, slapped me in the face and made me realize my chances weren’t good. I was honestly quite relieved, because I hoped that would reduce my feelings for you a little. But it didn’t. I still had those crappy feelings for you, and I just let them take over me. I knew that feeling.

I hadn’t been in love with someone for about 3 years now and I really missed that feeling. When you kinda feel like your life has a purpose now. There is that one person, that your universe spins around, you want to stay near her, you don’t wanna leave her, she makes you happy, she makes you feel safe. You like her smell, her aura, just her whole persona makes you happy. I didn’t have such a person in such a long crappy time, and I heavily missed it! But I am a rational and a realistic person and I always told myself “the right person will come, she’ll come when you least expect it.” And well, there you were - but it wasn’t at the least expected time, but you were the least expected person. And that evening was also when the great confusion began. I was kinda happy to be in love again! I think life is great when you are not in love, cause you have a lot less problems. But it’s also pretty dang boring. I experienced that for myself. Now I had someone to think about again, but I was just being sad that I didn’t have a great chance with you, and thought again: “Crap! I knew it! I wanted to be in love again, but that would just make me feel more sad and lonely than I am right now!” And I was fucking right. When I was near you, I was all happy and smiley and stuff, but in the evening when I layed in my bed, exhausted from the musical, still all aroused and fluttered and all, I was missing you. I’ve not seen you for half an hour and I’d see you again in about 6 hours, but I was already missing you. And that hurt.

And what also hurt, was the fact that the next day was the play when my best friend would watch the play.

(I knew this was gonna be one of many texts that I am most probably not gonna finish. But I’m gonna keep the long story short.)

She loved it. She loved you. And I knew it. I knew how she would react, and it was exactly like that. She also was hella in love with you. And I was still vigorously trying to get you out of my mind, but it didn’t work at all! It simply didn’t work.

And like that passed the musical! After the last show we went to the exclusiv club, I was happy that I was there with all the people I loved and that became my friends, and I was happy that you were there. Also if it hurt like hell because you danced the whole time with Nadi, but I simply told myself that it was better like that.

And on sunday, the big depression began. I was so incredibly sad, exhausted and missing you! I missed my whole squad, and it hurt so bad that I didn’t see everyone - that I also missed you just mixed into all the other missing, so it wasn’t that bad. And I knew that I was gonna see you again on Mimi’s birthday, so it wasn’t actually that bad!

But as time passed, those feelings slowly vanished. And I was pretty dang relieved about that. I though that on Mimi’s birthday I wouldn’t have any more feelings for you at all! But how wrong I was!!? Her birthday made it frickin’ worse! The feelings that I tried to repress and forget and kick in the trash can all came back in the second you came around the corner and smiled at us! And I was so angry! Like- can you plz stop it’s getting annoying, thanks. But that’s just what I thought when I layed in bed in the evening. When I was around you, I was just a bunch of happiness walking around. So, I can’t complain!

Same thing with the concert of the school bands! Before I went to the Rock Café I thought “well shit, he’s gonna be there. and Nadi, and all the others. but well.” But when I was with you, all those bad thoughts were gone! I was just HAPPY! Of course I was jealous as hell when Nadi sat the whole time on your lap, but for fuck’s sake, I can’t call you mine at all so it’s none of my business who sits on your lap. And you paid my coke! That was so cute, I was just dying inside and told you that the next round was my turn, stuttered around a little and let my heart freak the freak out inside my chest when you were smiling at me and cheered at me with your coke. I bet my hands were shaking as hell when I drank mine. AAAND, when we had to go home I could drive home with you - again! And this time JUST with you and your parents, nobody else. Shit, how I love spending time with you and just you. Anna and Manu had apparently gone somewhere (we all knew what they were doing - I mean Manu had 12 glasses of white wine and he and alcohol aren’t really good combis.) and so we just went home. On the MeBo back to Lana your mom actually asked if I could give you some Latin lessons, which was a fuckin’ slap in my face.

LATIN LESSONS MEANT TIME WITH YOU ALONE. FRICKETY FRACK.

Of course I instantly said yes - I mean, just casually, it’s not that I wanted to spend some of my free time for you to help you - gosh, that’s all I fucking wanted. That made me realize AGAIN that those feelings hadn’t vanished at all, no, they got worse and worse by every second I spent with you. And it looked like I was going to spend some more time with you.

During the vacations I CONSTANTLY struggled with myself. Should I text you? Shouldn’t I? What would you think? Would you think I’m clingy? Or constantly thinking about you? (well to be honest, I was both, but let’s forget that) On one of the first days of vacation I texted you and you also answered really kindly and somehow also apologizing for the time you didn’t have at all, and you said that you’d text again. (what kinda killed me. *cough*)

But well, you didn’t text at all! :)) Of course I wasn’t mad or anything, I knew that you had loads of stuff to do, but I wanted to meet you again so badly, that on monday after a whole fucking day of thinking and studying about whether text you or wait for you to text me, I just wrote if I could help you somehow! Because what would I loose? Nothing! I took my Latin stuff home with me - extra for you, just in case - and what happened? WE ACTUALLY MET!!!

I couldn’t think clearly during the whole choir rehearsal! Out of my mouth came “kyrie eleison”, and everything that was in my head was “FUCK IN TWO HOURS I’LL BE MEETING HIM FUCKFUSUHASDFGHJKL” Very helpful, really. And for God’s sake we went to the church and Virgi let us go a whole hour earlier! In fact, I was home so early that I had time to clean up the flat and to play the piano to chill myself down a little! And on 10 to 5 I put on my leather jacket to look extra cool, combed my hair, put on concealer and mascara again and walked nervously to the church to get you. I already knew that the moment I saw you, my heart would began to beat fast as hell, but the actress in me would be absolutely cool and chilled down. And it was exactly like that!

Fuck, the smile you gave me when you crossed the street, it wasn’t from this world. I knew that you played it extra big, but it was so shiny and cute anyways. Ugh, writing this makes me puke, usually I hate such cheesy writing, but for heaven’s sake, it was actually like that. We spent an hour together, I tried to give it my bestest to explain Latin to you and I was so insanely happy that I had again the chance to be with you. And that was the first time when we were actually completely alone. With nobody else. And I gotta say, I quite enjoyed it! I bet my last pants that you didn’t as much as I did, but I mean, we were doing Latin, your least favorite subject, so I can’t blame you. And I discovered that I am a horrible teacher. I should seriously consider to think three times before becoming one. Well, at least I had loads of fun! And I hope so much that you’ll need my help again. :P

And now, I pretty much reached the present of this long story, I mean it’s not an end, the story will continue and I will continue to share it with Tumblr, because Tumblr is my personal diary. I will most likely give you Latin lessons again - I hope so - and we will meet through Mimi, we’ll see each other at the dance show on the school yard, at the final school concert, we’ll play some mini golf, watch the Blue Folks at the Gaul festival - and what I’m most excited for: your birthday party and Anna’s 18th birthday. I’ll probably post a few more blog posts about those two events. Before they happen and after they happened - I’m excited what’s going to come out, to be honest.

Well, what’s left to say? I try my best not to fall in love with you any further, but you’re making it damn hard for me! I’ve got a huge crush on you, and I don’t wanna lie to myself anymore. I mean, it’s so obvious - I think about you the whole day, I really want you to be my boyfriend and sometimes I crave for you to be near me, but as I know my love life, I’m probably gonna be in the friendzone, again. What am I doing wrong, seriously? Another topic I should write a blog post about.

How should I end this text?

Maybe with the lyrics of a song that you sang during the changing room guitar sessions - I’m yours by Jason Mraz.

“Well, you done done me and you bet I felt it, I tried to be chill, but you’re so hot that I melted, I fell right through the cracks - and now I’m trying to get back - before the cool done run out I’ll be giving it my bestest And nothing’s going to stop me but divine intervention I reckon it’s again my turn to win some or learn some But I won’t hesitate no more, no more It cannot wait, I’m yours

Well open up your mind and see like me Open up your plans and damn you’re free Look into your heart and you’ll find love love love love Listen to the music of the moment people, dance and sing We’re just one big family And it’s our God-forsaken right to be loved loved loved loved loved So I won’t hesitate no more, no more It cannot wait, I’m sure There’s no need to complicate, our time is short This is our fate, I’m yours.”