#but i think that doing this is not going to get you that degree
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If we're taking anecdotal evidence in the form of Quora threads and Reddit posts, I'll pile mine on the other side of the scale: I'm a millennial who went to college for computer science. It was a rocky time for me because I was socially coddled even if I took a lot of academically challenging classes, so I actually attended a few colleges. I'm a cis white male who's mildly bisexual, so short of not being disgusted by dick, I'm about as much the "group of focus" as you can get.
My experience at a total of three colleges is what turned me off of college and it has nothing to do with how many women are in a classroom. I went only because I need a degree to get literally any job in my profession. The degree is not an experience focused on personal growth, it's a commodity, a gate between you and the job you want. I would warn people away from college if they're at all open to a career that doesn't require it for that reason, not because "girls are icky".
It's frustrating to see what is pretty obviously a class issue (higher education has been commodified and used to gatekeep historically high-paying professions) turned into a gender/race issue (men think learning is for girls and thus bad). I'm not saying there's no man out there who refuses to go to college because there are people not like him at it, but I would wager that's a vanishingly small minority compared to the people like myself who experienced first-hand the shortcomings and drawbacks of college and want anyone who attends, women and POC included, to consider whether that will actually get them what they want. If college does right by you, by all means, I just don't want you saddled with thousands of dollars in debt and a subpar education chasing the mirage of plentiful well-paying jobs, the way I and my generation were.
Why aren't we talking about the real reason male college enrollment is dropping? (Celeste Davis, Oct 6 2024)
"White flight is a term that describes how white people move out of neighborhoods when more people of color move in.
White flight is especially common when minority populations become the majority. That neighborhood then declines in value.
Male flight describes a similar phenomenon when large numbers of females enter a profession, group, hobby or industry—the men leave. That industry is then devalued.
Take veterinary school for example:
In 1969 almost all veterinary students were male at 89%.
By 1987, male enrollment was equal to female at 50%.
By 2009, male enrollment in veterinary schools had plummeted to 22.4%
A sociologist studying gender in veterinary schools, Dr. Anne Lincoln says that in an attempt to describe this drastic drop in male enrollment, many keep pointing to financial reasons like the debt-to-income ratio or the high cost of schooling.
But Lincoln’s research found that “men and women are equally affected by tuition and salaries.”
Her research shows that the reason fewer men are enrolling in veterinary school boils down to one factor: the number of women in the classroom.
For every 1% increase in the proportion of women in the student body, 1.7 fewer men applied.
One more woman applying was a greater deterrent than $1000 in extra tuition! (…)
Since males had dominated these professions for centuries, you would think they would leave slowly, hesitantly or maybe linger at 40%, 35%, 30%, but that’s not what happens.
Once the tipping point reaches majority female- the men flee. And boy do they flee!
It’s a slippery slope. When the number of women hits 60% the men who are there make a swift exit and other men stop joining.
Morty Schapiro, economist and former president of Northwestern University has noticed this trend when studying college enrollment numbers across universities:
“There’s a cliff you fall off once you become 60/40 female/male. It then becomes exponentially more difficult to recruit men.”
Now we’ve reached that 60% point of no return for colleges.
As we’ve seen with teachers, nurses and interior design, once an institution is majority female, the public perception of its value plummets.
Scanning through Reddit and Quora threads, many men seem to be in agreement - college is stupid and unnecessary.
A waste of time and money. You’re much better off going into the trades, a tech boot camp or becoming an entrepreneur. No need for college. (…)
When mostly men went to college? Prestigious. Aspirational. Important.
Now that mostly women go to college? Unnecessary. De-valued. A bad choice. (…)
School is now feminine. College is feminine. And rule #1 if you want to safely navigate this world as a man? Avoid the feminine.
But we don’t seem to want to talk about that."
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Said I Wouldn't, Part 1
Pairing: Dad!Terry Richmond x Virgin!Black!Fem!/ Plus Size reader
Warnings: 18+, Minors DNI, You are in charge of your own reading experience. Intentional use of AAVE. SMUT. Cursing, teasing (fem receiving), fingering (female receiving), All consensual. Sorry if I missed some.
Summary: Babysitting for Terry had its perks. You were able to see his gorgeous ass every night before heading off to your own house next door. And because he went to the gym on Wednesday nights, you had extra time to explore his room and live in your delusions. But when Terry catches you, you are unprepared for what comes next.
Word Count: 7,608k
AO3 Link
A/N: I...am just going to be honest. I am a WEAK woman when it comes to Aaron and since he's hellbent on killing me, I may as well surrender. Need that man. That full sleeve turned me FERAL. This should be a two-parter. I also fucked around and caught a bug, ugh. Pray for me. Toss a coin to your blogger by leaving a comment, gif, or unhinged ask.
“Will you marry me?”
You gasped as you turned to Mr. Terry’s son, Troy, as he looked at you with the sweetest expression on his little face. His eyes were wide and pleading, a shy smile on his face, as he glanced at you like you hung the moon.
Aww, how come there were no guys your age who wanted to marry you? Then again, you’d actually have to go out with someone for all that and well, you had better things to do. Like get your degree, find a better job, and actually do the whole adult thing before you brought a man into that.
You licked your lips to give yourself time to think of a proper answer. Though you didn’t know how you were supposed to navigate something like this. Mr. Terry hadn’t given you a laundry list of what was appropriate for you to handle and you were a bit out of your depth.
“That is really sweet of you to ask and you’re very brave. But I am entirely too old for you, buddy,” you said.
Troy tucked his legs beneath him and sidled closer to you. His shoulder knocked into the coffee table disrupting his homework and you fought a smile at the eagerness in his little body. “I’ll be a great husband! I’ll open doors for you and make you chicken nuggets!” He persisted.
See, the definition of romance. Who didn’t want their doors opened for them and chicken nuggets on demand? You put your pen down on the coffee table next to your own abandoned homework. You faced Troy and fought hard to keep the smile from your face. He was being serious so you’d respond in kind.
“That is a very tempting offer, Troy. But I’m very sorry. I have to say no,” you said.
His face crumpled but to his credit, he didn’t cry. He only scrunched up his face like he was lost in thought. He looked so much like Mr. Terry, it was frightening.
“But you’re so pretty! Like Dad said. And you’re a good person. Dad always said to find the prettiest, smartiest, good person and marry them. Not like bad girls,” Troy said.
“What makes a girl bad?” You asked. Out of all the things Troy said, your mind stuck on the fact that Mr. Terry thought you were pretty. It shouldn’t. It was wildly inappropriate, not to mention a cliche and a half, but…Mr. Terry was drop dead fuckin’ gorgeous. If someone like that called someone like you pretty, then…maybe…
“Dad said when they’re ma-man,” Troy said. He scrunched up his face again and then dug a small notebook from his pocket. He flipped a few pages before poking out his bottom lip. “Ma-mani-pu.” Troy sounded out the word, badly, but you knew better than to try and help him.
“Manipulative,” Troy finally pushed out.
You smiled and nodded your head. “That’s very good. You should stay away from those girls. In fact, the only thing on your mind should be those books you stopped paying attention to,” you said and tapped his math homework.
“I can do both,” he said, giving you a grin.
You chuckled. Just like his damn daddy… You rolled your eyes and tapped on his homework again. “Math homework, young man,” you said.
Troy sighed but you could already tell this would be an uphill battle. He sat back on the floor and tucked his legs under the table to complete his homework. He was a bit too small to really manage, but he wanted to be next to you while you did yours.
You worked in silence, working on your own homework, and when Troy was finished you looked over his answers. This new way of doing math was beyond you and that was without struggling from the old way. It looked about right. Hell, Troy needed to look over your homework with how smart he was.
“Great job, buddy. This goes straight to your backpack so you don’t lose it. And then it’s bath time,” you said.
Troy groaned, dropping his head dramatically to the coffee table. Your shoulders danced with silent laughter. What was it about kids avoiding the bath like the plague? Or maybe you were just a weird child all around. You loved taking baths and taking your Bratz dolls with you so they could go “swimming”.
“You know, if you want to make a great husband, there’s nothing girls like more than a boy who has good hygiene,” you said.
“Really?” Troy asked, popping his head up to look at you. “Even you?” After you nodded, Troy packed up his homework into his binder and then rushed to his room. This kid had your entire heart. You’d be sad to stop babysitting for him when Mr. Terry finally figured out what he’d do with the separation from his horrible wife. There would probably be a more permanent, vetted babysitter.
You were absolutely biased against Alivia, Mr. Terry’s wife. After moving in next door about a year ago, you had a front row seat to the awful way she treated Mr. Terry and Troy. Constantly shrieking and belittling them, no matter what they did. Keeping both virtually locked up in the house.
You could count on one hand the amount of times Mr. Terry or Troy had friends over. Or hell, a grandmother or cousin or something. When there were visitors, it was short lived. You were also witness to the screaming match when Mr. Terry finally threw her ass out of the house with nothing but a suitcase a few months back.
How anyone could treat those two like that was beyond you. But you didn’t know all of it. Only what you were able to see and be nosy about. Since you had no real life of your own, you spent your free time making up scenarios about other people. It was fun…until Mr. Terry invited you into their world to be a babysitter.
And since then, your severe crush only grew more ridiculous. Bordering on creepy really. But you just couldn’t help it. You’d have killed to have a life like this. A stable home, a wonderful kid, and a husband who was good and provided. You didn’t think this life was perfect, no life was perfect, but dammit…you yearned.
Troy started the bath and you stood up from behind the coffee table to stretch your legs. You fixed the deep rose colored bodycon dress you wore. Not entirely appropriate, but you skipped laundry day and who knows when you’d get another chance considering one of your roommates was a hog.
You walked down the short hallway to the bathroom and knocked on the door. “I’m in here!” Troy called out.
“Good, make sure you wash behind your ears, please!” You said.
“I will!” Troy called back.
You had about twenty minutes before Troy would be done. So you looked around the house, knowing full well you were alone, and then snuck off to Mr. Terry’s room. Yes, you knew it was wrong, but you couldn’t help it.
You managed to swipe an old T-shirt of Mr. Terry’s a month ago and so far, he hadn’t noticed. Or if he did, he just hadn’t mentioned it to you. It was the stupidest, boldest thing you’d ever done, but you couldn’t muster the energy to feel guilty about it. It was an old MCMAP shirt that you slept in nearly every night. It still smelled like him, years of his natural scent soaked into the fabric.
You did a deep dive on Mr. Terry after that, justifying it by telling yourself that you had to know who you were dealing with. Mr. Terry found you on a babysitting app but since you were right next door and a little friendly already, he bypassed all that to pay you directly. You appreciated the extra cash, but people were sick these days.
But every piece of information you managed to find out only made you fall in love with him that much more. He was on the freakin’ Wikipedia page, like…how could you not fall in love? You loved when people were really good at what they did. You were sure there was a name for it, but fuck if you knew it. You only knew that when someone was exceptionally good at something, it got you all hot and bothered.
Slipping into Mr. Terry’s room, you took a deep breath. This was where he laid his head at night. The rustic decor somehow fit the image you had of him in your mind. He had a dark, rustic walnut headboard that stretched to the ceiling. On it were two lamps that pointed to the bed.
On his nightstand, he had the same historical novel he started a month or so ago. He had a simple, thin brown blanket on his neatly made up bed. That was point one in why you would never actually work with someone like him. He was too neat for your blood. He’d probably have a heart attack seeing the state of your bedroom.
You tried, you really did, but well. You were grown enough to admit you just hated picking up after yourself. Not when you had better things to do like binge anime and go down Google rabbit holes for random things you thought about.
His furniture was simple, functional, much like the man himself but there was something so alluring about being in a man’s personal space. And you did mean a MAN. All capital letters included. You made sure to never touch anything. You just liked getting a peek behind that stoic exterior.
You glanced at your watch, still making good time, as you looked at the small bottles of cologne. They were nearly filled to the top so maybe he didn’t use it as much? Maybe he naturally smelled that damn delicious.
On his dresser, he had a few pictures thrown about of Troy and Alivia. You sucked your teeth looking at the batshit woman he married. Why did guys tend to go for the crazy, loud women? Were they allergic to peace? To a quiet night at home, basking in gooey love?
As your therapist put it, the world was not a stage and no, you couldn’t direct people’s actions. You were not that powerful. What Mr. Terry decided to do in his own bed was his own business. Speaking of…
You sat down on the edge of the bed and cast your eyes about the room. You didn’t always come in here. You weren’t that big of a pervert. Just on Wednesday nights. That was when he stopped by the gym after work. And he always came home sweaty and out of breath. If he were a bit closer, you were sure that he would jog or bike to the gym rather than taking his car.
As you sat there, you let your mind wander. What would it be like coming home to someone of his caliber? Someone able to carry a damn conversation beyond wondering what you were doing every two seconds. Someone to discuss books and themes with. Someone to binge anime with you and discuss the power scaling. Fun stuff.
An engine pulled up outside the house and you scrambled to get out of the man’s room as quickly as possible. The car door slammed outside and your heart pounded in your chest. Okay, he was a little too early tonight. You closed the door behind you just as his keys turned the lock. You jogged to the kitchen and opened a cabinet, grabbing a cup just as Mr. Terry’s keys hit the key bowl beside the door.
“Mr. Terry, hi,” you said, closing the cabinet door. You walked over to the fridge and poured a glass of water that you clearly needed.
Mr. Terry walked further into the kitchen and then gave you a small smile, putting his hands into his gym shorts pockets. He wore a simple gray T-shirt soaked through with sweat and damn, damn, damn, he looked good. His arms bulged underneath the short sleeved shirt, deep veins running along his arm. Delicious.
“Dad!” Troy barreled into the kitchen with a towel wrapped around his waist.
“Whoa, okay,” you said and turned around with a chuckle.
“Troy, we have company. You can’t run around naked like that,” Terry said. You heard movement but refused to turn around.
“I asked her to marry me, but she said no. But I was able to say manipulative,” Troy said, slowing down around the big word.
“Is that right?” Terry asked.
“Uh-huh. She said girls like when boys have good hygiene. So you should probably bathe too,” Troy said.
Terry laughed and you heard wrestling. “Is that your way of saying I stink?” Mr. Terry asked.
“Well, I wasn’t going to say anything…” you chimed in, not wanting to be left out.
“Oh that’s cold, you both got jokes. You, put some lotion and clothes on. And brush your teeth,” Mr. Terry said.
“Good night, Troy!” You called after the little boy as he took off towards the bathroom.
“Good night! See you tomorrow!” He yelled.
“It’s safe to turn around,” Mr. Terry said.
Naw, it really wasn’t. But you took a deep breath and turned around anyway. Somehow, the second time seeing him in all his sweaty glory was just as heart-stopping as the first time. You forgot all about your guilty activities as you openly stared at him in the kitchen.
It was by no means a small kitchen, but it felt claustrophobic standing there. As if his presence was a physical force field pressing into you from all sides. It was your stupid crush on the man that made you all tongue tied when you got around him.
“I hope he didn’t bug too much. I know he has a big crush on you,” Mr. Terry said.
You waved your hand. “He’ll grow out of it,” you said. They always do. But you kept that little tidbit to yourself. Though…you did want to ask about the pretty comment Troy mentioned earlier. But you were too chicken. Instead, you stood there awkwardly in this man’s kitchen for no reason. Other than to count the drops of drool pooling in your mouth.
“I should get going,” you said. Your chest was still beating rapidly and you needed to get out of his immediate vicinity. Like right now. You washed out the cup you used.
“You didn’t have to,” he said.
You giggled. “Now, what kind of guest would I be if I didn’t clean up after myself?” You could clean up for other people but when it came to yourself, you lost all motivation to do so. It was the ass-backwards manners you were brought up on, but hey. It wasn’t like anyone was coming to visit your messy bedroom anyway.
“Let me walk you home then,” Mr. Terry said.
“I’m just next door,” you said. You dried off the cup and replaced it in the cabinet. He stepped out of the way so that you could walk past him. His eyes tracked you as you moved through the living room, collecting your homework and pens.
“What kind of gentleman would I be if I didn’t?” Mr. Terry asked.
“Oh, you’re a gentleman now,” you said and giggled. Did you have a flashing neon sign professing your guilt? Or did your guilt make you suspicious of everything? Because right now, it seemed like Mr. Terry was employing high level interrogation tactics, staying cool and calm while he let your guilt do the talking for you.
“I’ve always been a gentleman,” he said.
You could only giggle, too nervous to say anything else as you loaded up your backpack and threw on your cut off jean jacket. Terry’s mesmerizing hazel eyes followed each movement. Were you that bad at acting? Was he about to tell you that he had cameras in his room and knew exactly what you did on Wednesday nights?
You needed to get a life and a half. Because the thought of getting caught only made it that much naughtier. Your imagination ran wild thinking of ways he could punish you for it. Preferably with a spanking. You bet those beefy hands would give a good one.
“H-How was work?” You asked. Damn, that sounded nervous, didn’t it?
“Same old story, different day,” he said.
You nodded. You sucked at conversation so you promptly shut your trap and walked with him outside of the door. The night air was crisp, the late January night so frigid that you could see clouds of your breath escape with each exhale. Dew collected on the blades of grass outside of Mr. Terry’s house and it soaked into your flat sandals, tickling your toes.
“How’s your degree goin’?” Mr. Terry asked, breaking the silence.
“Good. Though I think one of the professors hates me,” you said. You sucked your teeth, thinking of Mr. Shoop, your English teacher. If you didn’t have a comma in the right place, he marked you down for one reason or another.
“I’m sure it’s impossible to hate you,” Mr. Terry said.
You snorted with laughter, immediately censoring yourself as you released the ugly laugh. He didn’t need to hear all that. You cleared your throat and shrugged, telling him about the latest run in with Mr. Shoop. You made one little comment about the current book you were studying in class, and now he had it in his head that you were an uppity Negro.
“Fuck him, then. You’re supposed to challenge the status quo in college,” Mr. Terry said.
You giggled and crossed the low cement border to your own place. The grass was less green, more brittle and dead because no one in the house fucking cared about aesthetics. This was not your forever home. Once you graduated, you were getting the fuck out of here as if your pants were on fire.
“You ever go to college?” You asked.
“Naw. Enlisted as soon as I turned 18,” he said. His voice was like sweet honey in the middle of spring. It didn’t belong on this cold, quiet night in the ‘burbs. “It’s why I want Troy to focus on his grades. Make sure he has every opportunity I didn’t.”
The automatic porch light turned on bathing you both in its warm, yellow glow. It also highlighted your ugly brick porch with the mailbox half hanging off of the wall. You cringed as you climbed the steps but focused on the conversation.
“You’re doing an amazing job with him, Mr. Terry,” you said.
He scrunched his face, most definitely like Troy, and shook his head. “It’s just Terry,” he said.
“Yeah but –”
Mr. Terry stepped closer to you, drawing up to his full 6’3 height and looked down at you. You hoped he couldn’t hear your painful gulp.
“No buts. I’m not stepping down until you agree. We’re damn near the same age,” he said.
You opened your mouth to argue the point but his fierce eyebrows drew down in a challenge. You reared back with a grin and Mr. Terry’s eyebrow shot up in a dare. You licked your lips and nodded. Okay, touché.
“Terry,” you said, trying it out. It still sounded so wrong.
“Say it again,” Terry said, his eyes drooping lower.
“Terry,” you nearly whispered. Terry - gah, that was still so weird - leaned forward and for half a second, you thought he would kiss you. That he would plant those gorgeous pink lips on yours and kiss your sandals right off your feet.
Instead, he chuckled and then looked down. He shook his head and then stepped back. “My job isn’t done until you’re safe inside,” he said.
“You take this pretty seriously, huh?” You asked. Stupid. Why the hell would a man like that kiss his babysitter? Probably saw you as some teenager next door, even though he was correct. You were almost the same age. But he was more mature and put together than you could ever hope to be.
“Very seriously,” he agreed.
You dug in your jacket pocket for your keys, the tips of your ears aflame as you continued to berate yourself. To be clear, you knew you were pretty but you got tongue tied around gorgeous men. Regular men you could deal with. They were the regular, easy pickin’s off of any vine. But Terry was like a fully baked apple pie sitting in a window somewhere. Mouth watering, steamy, and sinfully tempting.
Men like that went for super thin fashion models or apparently, screaming harpies who liked to belittle men. And just like that, you remembered that he was technically married. There was no way that an upstanding man like Terry would step out on his wife, separation or no.
“Well, the neighborhood is safe since we have a man like you to keep watch,” you said. You turned the lock and opened the door, waving goodbye over your shoulder. Terry waved to you and then took off down the porch, clapping his hands together as he went back to his own house.
You closed and locked the door behind you, leaning your back against it as you sighed. That was entirely too close. But in your defense, he typically showed up after Troy was done with his bath. You’d have to get your snooping down to a more manageable time.
You groaned and headed to your room, bypassing the discarded clothing on the floor and random water bottles thrown about the foyer area. Pigs.
Living with two guys and another girl was the bane of your fucking existence. You and Gia had to put your foot down and explain that you weren’t their mothers or sisters or maids and you would not pick up after them. In rebellion, the two men, Andre and Malcolm, doubled down by not picking up after themselves either.
So if one of them slipped on their own shirts or didn’t have clean dishes, that was on them. Money was tight as you went through grad school, but you had enough to eat out and find alternatives to cooking. To each their own in this fucking house.
You made it to your room and closed the door, turning on lights and getting ready for bed. You settled in for your third watch of Jujutsu Kaisen, sitting comfortably in Terry’s MCMAP shirt but your mind raced as you played tonight over and over in your mind.
“Can I tell you a secret?” Troy asked, the following Wednesday night.
“Of course,” you said.
“I like when you’re around. My dad doesn’t seem so sad,” Troy said.
Cue your heart breaking in three, two, one…you sighed and put your pen down on the coffee table. Right back in your regular seats, Troy continued with his social studies homework as if he didn’t just say the saddest thing ever.
“What do you mean?” You asked.
Troy stopped writing but didn’t look up from his homework. “Dad was sad a lot when Mom was here. But he smiles more when you’re around. So that means you can’t leave, okay?” He asked and looked back at you with a shy, sad smile on his face.
“Troy, is that why you asked me to marry you? So I wouldn’t leave?” You asked.
Troy nodded. “Plus you’re really pretty. And soooo smart,” he said.
Kids. You smiled and hugged him, bringing him closer to you. “You don’t ever have to worry about these things, okay? Your job is to do your homework and listen to your dad. I’m right next door. If you ever need anything, you come get me, okay?” You asked.
Troy nodded but didn’t seem much convinced by your assurances. He was a kid but old enough to recognize when shit wasn’t sweet at home. With a mom like his, it was a wonder he stayed so innocent.
You were playing fast and loose with semantics, but Troy didn’t technically ask you to keep the secret. Only if he could tell you one. You’d have to talk to Terry when he got home and make sure the man talked to his son.
It couldn’t be easy trying to raise a kid in a broken home. The good Lord knew your own parents had a rough go of it. But Troy’s only concern should be which yogurt was in his lunchbox. Not his dad’s happiness or lack thereof.
You helped look over his answers and helped him in the few areas he got wrong. You helped him solve the problem on his own, not just hand him the answers. “Alright buddy, bath time,” you said.
“Because girls like boys with good hygiene,” he recited.
“Exactly,” you said and nodded your head.
Troy grabbed his homework and stuffed it into his binder. Then he turned to you with a serious expression on his face, entirely too much like his dad. He was eight. What eight year old needed to be so serious?
“One day, I’ll be old enough to marry you,” he promised.
You giggled. “You are going to meet the love of your life and forget all about little ole me,” you said.
Troy shook his head and grinned. “I could never forget you.”
“You know what, you sweet talker. Bath time, now. You’re too young to think about marriage anyway,” you said with a giggle.
Troy skipped into his room to put up his homework and then he trudged to the bathroom with a change of clothes and a fresh towel. You heard the bath water running while Troy hummed to some song you didn’t know.
You checked your watch. After such a close call last time…you really shouldn’t. But it had become a ritual at this point. Your body compelled you to move, to go to his room and pretend for twenty minutes that he was coming home to you.
You didn’t actually want this type of domestic life but…well, who were you fooling? This was exactly what you had planned for your life. But as a nerdy, thickum Black girl with too much time on her hands, no one was exactly beating down your door for your hand in marriage.
Let alone anything resembling sex. You’d become an expert at handling things yourself but you didn’t know what the actual act was like. And it was too embarrassing to tell grown ass men that you were a virgin and waiting on an actual connection before hopping in bed.
Sue you, sex meant something to you. And you weren’t going to give up the cookies because some egg head batted his eyes at you and took you on one date.
You spun around in Terry’s room trying to determine if he moved anything. Added anything. Removed anything. You just liked knowing him. Knowing a side of him that most didn’t get to see. It was what kept you going, something silly to keep your mind busy when school got too tough or the roommate situation sucked hot marbles.
Your eyes caught on the book on his nightstand. He finally finished the historical novel. The new book he was reading was a crime novel and from the blurb on the back, it sounded pretty interesting.
You were so caught up in the blurb and the first page, taking care not to disturb too much, that you didn’t notice Terry’s car pull up. Or his keys in the doorway, or him calling your name. You were so absorbed in it, that you dropped the book when Terry entered his room.
“Oh,” you gasped.
Your heart jumped to your throat as Terry smirked and tilted his head. “What are you doing in here? Where’s Troy?” He asked.
“Bath time,” you croaked out. Your throat turned dry and scratchy, pulling each word out as if it were being dragged over jagged glass. You had no good excuse for why you were in this man’s room, picking up his book, when you were supposed to be watching his son.
What if Troy had drowned? What if he suddenly lit the house on fire? Shame made your stomach gurgle as your mind raced for any type of excuse or reason to be in his room. Babysitting 101 was watching your damn kid.
Terry stepped into the room and closed the door behind him. You were frozen, rooted to the spot, heart beating rapidly and your fingers started to shake. What was he going to do?
Terry walked closer until he bent down to pick up the discarded book. He flipped it over and dusted it off, being entirely too casual for your tastes. “What were you doing in here?” He asked, his voice too, too calm.
You backed away towards the wall and shook your head. When your back collided with it, you were out of space. So you began to move to the side, sliding against the wall and trying to create some distance.
Terry turned with you, stepping in time with you, not letting you out of his sight. It was his right. It was his house after all. And you were the creepy pervert in his room. “I didn’t steal anything, I swear,” you said, your voice too small.
“That’s not what I asked,” he said. He smirked as if this was all a funny misunderstanding. Like it was normal to find you being a creep in his room.
“You don’t have to call the cops, I promise. I’ll leave and…I won’t come back,” you said. God, you didn’t even want to try and explain this to the cops or your family. You were completely mortified and disgusted with yourself. You knew you should have left it alone.
“I didn’t say anything about the cops,” he said. He stepped closer to you and you smelled the sweat and overall male scent wafting off of him in waves. He wore a red shirt this time, soaked through with sweat and clinging to his well honed chest.
He was tall as hell, looming over you whether he wanted to or not. You didn’t know this game he was playing and you just wanted to leave. You were at a loss of what to say or do. He blocked the exit with his body. There was just him. His broad shoulders, his wide chest, his hypnotizing eyes.
“What were you doing in here?” He asked softly.
“I just wanted to know you,” you said just as softly. It was a pathetic excuse but at least it was honest.
“Why didn’t you ask me?” He asked.
You snorted with laughter before clicking your mouth shut. Terry’s eyebrows furrowed and he reached out to cup your cheek. You looked from his hand to his face. Was this man okay? Shouldn’t he be…angry? Upset? Confused? You’d broken his trust in the worst possible way. Got yourself plum fired over something so stupid. This wasn’t going the way you thought it would in your mind.
“Why do you do that?” He asked.
“Laugh?” You asked. God, you felt like an idiot.
Terry smirked. “Stop yourself from laughing. It drives me nuts,” he said.
“Oh,” you said. You shook your head and shrugged. “I have a weird laugh.”
Terry leaned closer so that his nose rubbed against yours. “I keep waiting to hear it but you don’t ever let yourself laugh out loud,” he said.
You narrowed your eyes but you were slowly calming down from the threat of discovery. For the time being, it looked like Terry wasn’t going to smack you to kingdom come. This…you didn’t know what this was but you weren’t about to stop him either. This was the closest you’d ever been to him. Ever. You were going to soak up every detail before he kicked you out flat on your ass.
“I didn’t know you were waiting to hear it,” you said.
Terry leaned away so that he could look into your eyes. Fuck, he was so pretty. With his ever changing eyes, one of your favorite past times was trying to figure out what color they were. Sometimes they were so blue it would make the ocean jealous. Sometimes they were a stormy gray. Other times, they were a pale brown. It was insane but kept your mind busy.
“You drive me crazy,” he said, the words slowly spilling from his lips with that subtle drawl.
“Me?” You asked and snorted. Oh, if he only fucking knew… He drove you to distraction without even trying. One look, one sound from him and you were ready to bend over, ass up, and let him have his wicked way with you.
“Is that surprising?” He asked.
“Um…yeah,” you said and giggled. This was like the statue of David coming to life and asking a painting on a date. The mediums were both gorgeous but one was more lauded than the other.
“I know I can be…serious,” Terry said. You snorted again and he tapped your nose. “But I didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable. Like I was some creep, you know?” He asked.
“Yeah, well. I’m the one who was in your room, being inappropriate. I completely understand if you want to fire me…”
“Troy would kill me if I did,” he said and smirked.
You giggled. “You’d still have the right to. I am really, really sorry,” you said.
Terry’s hand moved from your cheek, down the sides of your body before landing on your hips. You gasped, your body tingling in areas you didn’t know you could tingle. Like his hands were a live wire and your body responded in the most unusual ways.
“You always seemed so nervous around me. I thought I scared you,” he said.
“The opposite actually,” you admitted. Hell, at this point, you might as well lay it all out. Put yourself on a silver platter, ready to be served up to Terry’s mercy. His thumbs pressed into your tummy and you gasped, shivering.
“The way you respond…have you ever been with anyone?” He asked.
You shook your head. You didn’t have the words to say you were a virgin. Didn’t want to be even more of a loser in his eyes. Terry cursed softly under his breath and shook his head.
“So no one’s ever touched you? Why not?” He asked.
You licked your lips and shrugged. “Guys just don’t like me like that.” It was the only answer you had to give. You were the in-between friend. You were the holdover friend people had before they found their forever person. Without fail, any man you were interested in went on one or two dates with you before suddenly finding the light of their fucking lives.
After the last guy literally went to the bathroom on your date and came back with someone else’s number, you swore off any hunt for a partner. What was the point? You wasted outfit after outfit, faced disappointment after disappointment, and well, you just wanted off of the merry-go-round.
Terry tilted his head before stepping away. He pulled you towards his dresser and made you face the mirror. He pressed in behind you and you sighed, feeling a bulge rub against your ass.
You stared at his face in the mirror and watched as his face ran through a gauntlet of emotions. Like he was fighting with himself and losing the battle, fast. He placed his chin on your shoulder and then sighed.
“What do you see?” He asked.
“Me…and you…” You said. You weren’t trying to be a dumb ass, but it seemed like he was playing chess while you were playing Bingo.
Terry smirked. “What do you see when you look at yourself?”
You took a deep breath. You began to describe the features that you saw in the mirror. The way you did your hair, the way you did your makeup, the jewelry that you wore. Terry shook his head.
“I see a sexy, beautiful woman. I see someone that drives me fuckin’ nuts. A woman that makes me want to do awful, disgusting things to,” he said.
“Ahh,” you said and shivered from the intense look in his hazel eyes.
Terry’s hands moved up to cup your breasts over the top of your bodycon dress. You chose the burnished orange one today, once again at the mercy of Malcolm who acted like he was the only one who could use the fucking washing machine.
You moaned and bowed forward but Terry’s hands kept you upright. No one ever told you how different it was for someone to touch you as opposed to touching yourself. Everything seemed more intense, more lively, more electric.
“And I just can’t hold myself back anymore. Tell me to stop,” Terry said. He moved his head to kiss your neck, your jaw, and behind your ear.
You moaned, body shivering from how good he felt. How right his hands felt on your body. He pulled the top of your dress down, cupping your bare titties in his hands and pinching your nipples.
“Oh, fuck,” you moaned, knees getting weaker the more he tugged and pinched and pulled. Your pussy responded, throbbed, and you grew wet instantly soaking your panties.
“Tell me to stop,” Terry said, near begging as he continued to kiss and lick on your skin.
“I-I can’t,” you sighed. How could you tell him to stop when this was the only thing you ever wanted? The only thing you ever dreamed of?
“If you don’t tell me to stop, we’re going to cross a line. I need you to say it, please,” Terry said. As he spoke, his hands gripped the sides of your dress and pulled until your dress pooled around your hips.
You moaned as his fingers touched your thighs, fingers digging in and massaging you. His hands moved towards your panties, cupping you over the flimsy fabric. There was a thin layer separating you from what you most wanted.
“I can’t say it. You have to be the stronger one,” you said. He had to be. Because at this moment, there was nothing you would deny him. If he wanted a star from the Hollywood Walk of Fame, you’d be there the next day with a jackhammer and crow bar.
Terry dropped his head to your shoulder and groaned, his fingers moving closer to the seat of your panties. “I need you to say it,” he said.
You shook your head. You leaned forward and planted your hands on the dresser top, no longer able to support yourself standing. You were absolutely weak in the knees, ready to collapse at any given moment.
Terry’s left hand snaked around yours and grasped yours, fingers tangling. His right hand finally pushed your panties aside and he groaned, finding you soaking wet. “Fuck,” he moaned.
“Oh my god,” you moaned.
It was wildly different for his fingers to be there instead of your own. He moved expertly, soaking his fingers with your essence and playing with your clit. You shook violently on his fingers, too in your head to enjoy what he was doing.
“Breathe,” he whispered.
You sucked in deep pulls of air, your breathing returning to a normal rhythm. You nodded though you were out of your mind with pleasure. With feeling. His fingers plunged into your pussy and you cried out.
“Shh, shh,” he whispered.
Right. Right. There was an entire kid taking a bath at the moment. And here you were letting his dad play with you like a damn fiddle. You couldn’t find one ounce of regret. One ounce of shame.
His fingers helped you find heaven, light exploding behind your eyelids as your stomach twisted and caved from the pleasure he was delivering. His left hand tightened on yours as you got closer and closer to your orgasm.
“Fuck, fuck me. Please,” you begged. You needed to know what it felt like. Needed to know right this second what he felt like getting inside you. Your pussy was empty, aching, begging for his dick and you pushed your ass into his bulge to get him to cave.
Terry groaned and pushed into you, pushing your hips against the edge of his dresser. He moaned as he dry humped against you, timing his wrist movements with his strokes.
“No condom,” he panted in your ear.
“Please,” you begged. You whined, you cried. You didn’t have a fucking clue what you were saying, only that you needed that bulge inside you. NOW.
Terry bit your ear. “I’m not gonna endanger you,” he said.
You collapsed forward. He leaned against your back and then got down to business. Rubbing your clit in circles until you leaned up on your tip toes and bit your lip as you came, flooding his fingers with your slick as the orgasm rocked you on the spot.
Your world quaked, cracked in half, and then was brought back together by Terry’s grunts and groans. As you came down, you panted and huffed, no energy left in your body. Terry withdrew his fingers and then brought his fingers to his mouth and suckled.
You watched him in the mirror as he closed his eyes. “Fuck,” you huffed.
Terry winked at you as he adjusted your panties and your dress. You opened your mouth plenty of times but there were no words to be found. What could you say? What could you do?
“Helllooooooooo,” Troy called out. He sounded as if he had been calling out for a minute.
Terry adjusted himself and then kissed your neck. “Don’t move,” he said.
He left the room and you heard him talking to Troy. He told the boy to brush his teeth and Troy tried to argue until Terry threatened to check his toothbrush. Troy laughed and his footfalls ran back to the bathroom.
You were still stuck in the same position you were before, hands planted on Terry’s dresser as if his command not to move had to be followed to the letter. You looked down at the pictures on his dresser, of his smiling wife and son.
Yet somehow…fuck her. You didn’t feel any guilt fucking her man in what used to be her bedroom. You didn’t know where she was or if she was even coming back. You didn’t hold any expectations. Only that you wanted what you wanted and you weren’t going to apologize for it. If this was the only thing you got from Terry, then so be it. Because it was…life changing.
Terry re-entered the room and closed the door behind him. He wrapped his arms around your waist and kissed your shoulder. “We’re going to talk about this.”
You nodded. Yes, there definitely needed to be a discussion about this. “Not tonight,” you said.
Terry tilted his head at you. “I mean…we both need to cool down and Troy needs you. We’ll talk tomorrow? When you get home?”
Terry looked as if he wanted to argue. He rubbed his goatee and sighed heavily. But he had to know you were right. The last thing you wanted to do was interrupt Troy’s routine. Doubly so now that his mom wasn’t home. God, that poor kid had enough to deal with.
Terry nodded but turned you around to look at him. He grabbed your chin and forced you to look him in the eyes. “We’re going to talk about this. Tomorrow. When I get home.”
You nodded. Terry pulled you close, giving you a tender, beautiful but way too quick kiss and then let you go. You gathered your nerves and then left his room, looking out for Troy. Not seeing him, you hurried over to your homework and gathered it up, stuffing it into your backpack haphazardly.
You were ten kinds of turned around. You needed to freak out about this before you could have an adult conversation about what happened between you. Time to lock down your emotions and feelings so that when Terry gave you “that talk”, the one about how this couldn’t happen again, you would be prepared. You wouldn’t embarrass yourself by begging, screaming, throwing up for not having another chance to explore more.
But…you said you’d be happy with this. And you would be. You so would be. This was…honestly the best outcome you never planned for. You finished and pulled on your sweater and walked towards the front door.
Terry called out to Troy that he was walking you next door and you said goodbye to Troy. The night didn’t seem quite so cold this time around. Perhaps your body was still flushed, reliving the best orgasm of your life.
Your shoes crunched beneath your dead lawn as you hopped up the porch. Terry stopped you with a hand on your arm. He rubbed his thumb back and forth but didn’t say anything.
What was there to say? He rocked your world? He shifted your axis? Up was down and down was up thanks to the power of his fingers? His fingers. Lordy lordy. Maybe you wouldn’t survive getting fucked by him. You were glad one of you had the presence of mind to be safe and not fuck without a condom.
“Tomorrow,” you promised.
Terry nodded and then waited for you to get inside before trudging back to his place. And no matter how many times you tried to feel bad, the only thing you could think of was his face as he moaned and his fingers buried to the knuckle in your pussy.
I just ain't slowing down any time sooooon. The Secret Terry Richmond Files
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Brennan Lee Mulligan arguing for the primal nature of morality on Ep. 40’s Fireside Chat is one of the funniest and realest things I’ve ever heard. He once again put into words what I have been trying to say for what feels like forever.
EDIT: No, I actually need to quote this out for myself.
“One of the things that happens a lot in philisophy that is, I think, a point of failure, potentially, in it, is that philosophy contains a lot of formal logic studies, and there’s a degree to want to sort of explicate, logically, everything, and go like, ‘What are the reasons and rationalities behind all of this?” But I think ignoring the primal origins of morality- You don’t need- If you watch someone kick a small animal, you don’t need an explanation for why that’s bad. It’s a first- It’s a primary thing, right? And you get into weird positions when you’re like, ‘I believe that humans should have good- be flourish and be happy, and have safety and joy!’ And someone can literally just go ‘Why? To what end? To what end should they have joy?’ And you’re like ‘Not to what end. I’m saying this is the end for me. The end for me is joy and safety and peace.’ And I get to say that because I’m a weird brain monster living in the universe and I can create meaning with my mind. You’re doing the same thing right now, but I just choose joy. Are you choosing something else? Because if you are, then we’re in conflict!” -Brennan Lee Mulligan, “Fireside Chat for WWW ep40 ‘Aid and Comfort’”
Choose joy, motherfucker! If you’re not, we’re in conflict!!!
#worlds beyond number#the wizard the witch and the wild one#wbn fireside chat spoiler#wbn fireside#brennan lee mulligan#queerlyvictorian posts
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Would you change anything in the goat miraculous since its power is so similar to that of ladybug?
I'm going into this with the idea I'm totally rewriting the power, not my usual "upgrade" powers where I try to give a character an additional power on top of the canon one:
Trying to think of things associated with goats off the top of my head - incredible climbing ability, destructive power (those KICKS can destroy cars), powerful jumps - are things that most of the heroes get just by putting on magic suits, unfortunately. The base powers of all the heroes does nick a few super-powers out (like I think the Goat/Sheep/Ram or Ox or even Pig/Boar would be a good fit for busting through walls or highly dense objects, but technically every hero is strong enough to do that)
Maybe I'd work off the climbing ability by making the Goat's ability to be able to turn the gravity off? Like they can make everything in a range float but they're the only one still grounded and able to navigate it. Or, the Goat themselves can turn off their own gravity to climb walls at a 90 degree angle or even the ceiling. That way it's not *totally* made useless by the Flying Potion and can be very essential in certain situations. Now I just need a weird name for the power.
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[Wicked Act II spoilers]
[edited for tone and clarity of purpose, apologies for initial crudeness and frustration]
Okay, obviously I'm biased, but I'm gonna need the Fiyeraba shippers to please set a lot of your people straight about some things. I've seen way too many people trying to say that Glinda is just a selfish bimbo and that Fiyero is a virtuous and selfless figure more worthy of Elphaba's love. I'll set aside for now the idea of "worthiness" in this context. But let's start off with Fiyero joining the Wizard. Hoo boy...
Yes, he was initially somewhat less tolerant of the propaganda against Elphaba than Glinda was; yes, he was secretly trying to find her so he could run away with her or whatever. But honey: those facts DO NOT fully absolve his actions as the Wizard's top officer, or selfish recklessness throughout Act II. I see so many popular threads and posts romanticizing and whitewashing with "oh but he didn't REALLY join the Wizard, he just pretended so he could try to get to Elphie! It's all for love, and he sacrificed everything for her!" As if the literal captain of the literally fascist forces responsible for the oppression of Animals wasn't equally responsible for said oppression?? Hello? Fiyero really didn't think of seeking out Elphaba in ANY other way that DIDN'T involve becoming *checks notes*... the trusted leader of the troops committing all the abuses she's fighting against in the first place???? Like it's cool and all that he helped with Brrr, and it's all well and good that he planned on betraying the Wizard as soon as he found Elphaba (which took literal years, so I guess we're left to assume he was prepared to just keep doing fascism indefinitely if she didn't show up????), but uh... it's kind of concerning to how eager some of you are to make excuses for this dude volunteering as the head of the Ozian Gestapo??? smdh
He didn't accomplish anything from it either, by the way — like yeah, we get it, he did everything he did whilst silently fantasizing about running away with the Witch he was being paid to hunt. Fine. But I can't be the only one who doesn't buy that as an actual excuse???? Like, guys: nobody forced him to join the fascist army — even with crazy ulterior motives. He wasn't coerced into it; it wasn't his only choice or anything. Searching for Elphaba did not somehow compel him to go and volunteer to follow (or to give!) orders in the name of the dictator who was trying to have her assassinated the entire time. He could have just not done all that. (Genuinely so curious how the second film plans on covering that material tbh)
Glinda made several questionable decisions that can be (and have been) debated, but she is still very unambiguously a victim. Her position in the Wizard's regime was foisted upon her. There are things we can discuss, but I find that many folks need reminding that Glinda would undoubtedly have been disposed of (or worse) if she failed to make herself useful. I mean hell: she wasn't even supposed to meet the Wizard in the first place — she was only there because of Elphie. If she'd tried to resist, it would have immediately gotten her labeled the Witch's accomplice. As soon as she'd chosen not to get on the broom, her fate was out of her hands, and all available options were varying degrees of horrible.
That's not the case with Fiyero. He went to the Wizard all on his own; no one ever cornered or forced him into it. Thinking Animals are people, and having a crush on Elphaba, simply did not stop him from carrying out the regime's orders — for years. It's not clear exactly how long he's been captain at the start of Act II, but the clear implication is that he's been a soldier for most of the time skip. I've seen Fiyeraba accounts with headcanons about him acting as a double agent, secretly doing stuff to help Animals — and that's a great idea, it would indeed serve to make a lot of his actions way more palatable — but until we actually get to SEE some of that (maybe they'll add it for the movie version of Act II; we'll have to see), there is nothing in the story to suggest that. He certainly didn't do a damn thing for all those Animals who were enslaved and caged in the Wizard's palace — and we don't see a single other Animal outside of there in Act II, so as far as we know Fiyero has participated over those years in the near-total removal of Animals from Ozian society. In the name of "finding Elphaba". Not fighting for her cause. Just finding HER. For HIMSELF.
It's fine to have a ship you like, obviously — and there is genuinely a lot to like about Fiyeraba, I don't dislike the idea of them as a couple or as friends — but come on guys: please stop those out there idealizing Fiyero as somehow a clear "morally-superior" alternative to Glinda, lol. The dude had power, access, and opportunities, for years, that he could have wielded in any number of really selfless, revolutionary ways. He didn't. And I propose (apparently controversially): he simply didn't want to. And that — at the end of the day — is (much as some would like to deny it) true to his character. He always WANTED to be self-absorbed and shallow, and all his actions are consistent with that. Elphaba saw depth and discontentment in him, yes: but (and I cannot stress this enough) when given the chance, he channeled that in the wrong direction. He didn't confront that and become a better person — for the most part he just displaced and projected it onto Elphaba as an object of obsession, and put on an even thicker pretense than before.
All his actions — regardless of the complexity he has deep down — are those of a man who never gives one fuck about anything or anyone, except (kinda sorta) Elphaba. But even then: at no time does the care he has for her seem to extend to caring about any of her wants or needs outside of sexual validation from him, or how she might feel about his actions, or indeed the impacts of those actions upon her, her cause, or anyone or anything else. I don't think it should be all that controversial to say: he doesn't think through the wider repercussions of anything he does — thoughtlessness is just one of his core character traits. He doesn't think ahead or see meaning in anything outside of what can temporarily excite him, in the moment. I think people place a little too much weight on Elphaba clocking him with regard to his internal pain, and seem to expect (understandably of course) that she is not only right, but moreover that he will grow from that in a positive direction, based on her influence.
But he doesn't. If anything, we get a surprising inverse: he pretty much proves her wrong. Not to say he didn't have hidden depth and all that, like she said: but his hypothetical heart of gold proves not to really amount to much in practice. He doesn't grow out of his shallowness and his self-centeredness: he grows into it in a way that he hadn't quite yet in school. Where once he was only masking an internal listlessness, after he's been cracked open by Elphaba he decides to be genuinely self-absorbed and deeply shallow, not just coasting by. He performs in new ways — as a soldier, eventually as a "fiancé", etc. — but by Act II we meet a Fiyero who has staked the last remaining shred of humanity in him on the vain pursuit of the only object of his desire that has ever been unavailable to him, and firmly chosen to say to hell with everyone and everything else.
When put to the test, Fiyero sacrifices Glinda, the Animals, and all else that Elphaba actually cared about, to pursue his own unresolved crush from college. Mostly to get in her pants, really — as harsh as I'm sure that sounds. But let me be frank: that is literally all he ever accomplishes in the show. He gives her dick one time, and one of his castles, and that's it. That's the culmination of his years trying to find her — years in which he actively worked as one of the stormtroopers (or even the one commanding them) committing untold crimes against Animalkind (who, again, it seems have been all but erased from Oz by Act II): y'know, the very crimes Elphaba sacrificed her life to try and stop????? He spent the most important time of his life — of his own free will — being a fascist soldier, but he "did it for her" somehow, so according to some, it's perfectly fine. Heroic, even. Yikes??
But let's make something very clear (since my original version of this post caught a lot of flak, including slurs and other rudeness):
I like Fiyero. I find his role extremely interesting (I could do a whole dissertation on him, but I'm especially a fan of the way his proving Elphaba's assessment of him wrong presents a fascinating parallel and contrast with Glinda, which I think is lost on a lot of people). But PLEASE stop with all the misguided Glinda slander and idealization of Fiyero. By all means, thirst! But don't give me all this bullshit about him deserving Elphaba more, or being super deep, or being really principled or noble or whatever else. He does have layers, and quite intriguing ones, but his insides are straw — he isn't meant to have some deep, overwrought emotional core or motivations; he has passions that he acts upon when given the chance. That's it. And that's fine. Actually kind of refreshing in a story rooted in simple children's fantasy but rife with intensely complicated personalities. Fiyero makes it his mission to represent denial of depth and embrace of raw, spontaneous desire — and I for one love that, and wish others appreciated it.
And in all seriousness, shipping wars aside: by the end of the story, it's Glinda who is ultimately vindicated, and has — for all her faults — made the necessary choices to fulfill Elphaba's wishes, bring down the regime, etc. And all that despite herself. She's miserable: not just because of the mistakes she made, but because of her correct moves as well. Fiyero is simply not — and could never be — that person. And that's okay! Like I said: I am not anti-Fiyero. Fiyero's willingness to throw it all away for the sake of sheer, overriding passion is a huge part of what people like about him, of course — and it's an obvious factor in the attraction between him and Elphaba, because she has her own flavor of that impulse as well — but I'd actually argue that it's not romantic, it's his fatal flaw. And thematically that's fantastic! But I just don't believe that it somehow means he "deserves Elphaba more" because he "gave up his life for her" or whatever. In part because NOBODY truly "deserves" Elphie tbh, not 100% (and I question anybody who claims otherwise), but ultimately because I don't accept the idea that his fleeting acts of passion make up for all the shit leading up to them (or even proceeding after them tbh). At least Glinda managed to do what Elphaba always wanted in the end — but I would die on this hill even if Gelphie didn't exist.
You don't have to agree with my analysis of Fiyero and his choices, relationships, etc. — that's fine. What isn't fine is trying to portray Glinda as some kind of spineless traitor whore for the Wizard and Fiyero as a conscientious hero who earned Elphie through self-sacrifice. That's just not the story that was written. It's WAY messier and more interesting than that.
#wicked#gelphie#elphaba thropp#elphaba#glinda x elphaba#glinda upland#wicked movie#elphaba x glinda#glinda#fiyeraba#fiyero#fiyero tigelaar#elphiyero#gliyeraba
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Bat inco quotes
Roy, in Jason’s bed: Morning… how’d ya sleep last night? Jason, knocking Roy off: WHAT THE HELL?! Roy: Ow— Jason: What were you doing in my bed? You were supposed to sleep on the air mattress on the floor! Roy: I had a nightmare. Jason: You had a nightmare? What are you, five years old? Roy: Listen, I needed to feel comfortable and I was getting this perverse power dynamic vibe from me sleeping on the floor and you sleeping up there- Jason, in a royal accent: Why yes, how high and mighty I am up on my twin XL! Roy: That is not what I meant— Jason: Silence in the presence of your king, who sleeps a lofty twelve and a half inches above the ground! Roy: Listen, I’m not ashamed. I slept comfortably when I got up on your bed and I’m sure you did too. Jason: Yeah, okay- Roy: You know what? I wanna know. How’d you sleep last night? Jason: …That was the best I’ve slept in a while. Roy, gasping: The king slept comfortably with a peasant in his bed! Jason: I did not consent to this- Roy, dramatically: But my liege, our love is forbidden! Jason, on the phone: Hi, is this the front desk? Yeah, there’s a bed bug in my room and he’s five-foot-eleven, he’s got red hair- Roy: Ask them if they have one of those “Do Not Disturb” signs. I’ll put it on the door next time we… do it. Jason: Okay, I'ma go shower and wash all of the you off of me. Roy: Oh, maybe together we could— Jason: NO. Roy: Just to save water— Jason: No! You don’t even pay for the water! Roy: …Good point.
Steph: *Texts a selfie to the group chat* Hey besties!! Jason: *Texts a selfie clearly parodying Steph's* hey besties !!1! Steph: I literally hate you so much.
Dick, holding a box of Lunchables: Ah, I loved these when I was your age… fine dining. Damian: Fix yourself.
Tim: What did you guys get in your yearbook? Steph: 'Prettiest Smile' Dick: 'Nicest Personality' Jason: 'Most likely to start a bar fight' Cass: 'Least likely to start a bar fight, but most likely to win one'
Steph: Today at 7 am, Tim poured a Monster energy drink in their coffee, said "I'm going to die" and drank the whole thing. Dick: I watched Tim brew their coffee with Monster instead of water. Three cups in two hours. I think they ascended into the astral realm. Damian: The survivability of the human race never fails to amaze me.
Damian, carrying a box: What would you say if- if I, hypothetically, came home with 7 kittens one day? Bruce: … Bruce: What’s in the box? Damian: What woul- Bruce: Damian, what’s in the box? Damian: I think you know.
Bruce: Did you buy eggs like I asked? Damian: Even better! Bruce: What the fuck did you- Damian: *holding up a chicken* Her name is Fluffy.
Tim: What are we gonna do?! Jason: Blame you?
*Dick comes home absolutely drunk, undresses, and stands in Barbara’s bedroom.* Barbara: Dick, are you.. coming to bed? Dick: No thank you, I’m sure you’re lovely but I have a girlfriend. Dick: *Lies on the ground and falls asleep* Barbara: ...
Roy: sapnu puaS. Kori: What?? Jason: What language is that? Roy: Turn your phone 180 degrees. *Roy was removed from the groupchat*
Kon, admiring a sleeping Tim: You’re so cute. Tim, sleepily: I could beat your ass. Kon, lovingly: I know.
Duke: How do those little boys on XBOX parties always know what slur to call you? Tim: They're empaths.
Steph: We can bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 degrees for 1 minute. Dick: No, that's not how you make cookies. Duke: FLOOR IT!! Jason: How about 4,000,000 degrees for 1 second?!? Damian: YOU'RE GONNA BURN THE HOUSE DOWN- Steph: I'M GONNA HARNESS THE POWER OF THE FUCKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES! Tim: DO IT! Bruce: NO-
Tim, at Kon: Would you like to stay for dinner? Bernard, from the kitchen: Would you like to stay forever!?!
Damian: What the fuck is with english teachers and being like; "write a story about a deep and personal memory that impacted your life". Ma'am, if I do that you're going to send me to the counselor's office.
#jason todd#roy harper#jayroy#stephanie brown#dick grayson#damian wayne#cassandra cain#tim drake#bruce wayne#batfamily#batfam#barbara gordon#dickbabs#koriand'r#kori anders#joyfire#kon el#timkon#duke thomas#timberkon#timbernkon
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Under the Gilded Lens - Luigi Mangione x reader
Synopsis: Luigi and Y/N had very different upbringings. Luigi went to a prep school, comes from a wealthy family. Y/N's life is the opposite of that. They never had a problem before navigating how different their upbringings, but when Luigi takes Y/N as a plus one to a Gilman alumni event, she starts to feel out of place and like she doesn't belong.
Warnings: Swearing, classism, fluff.
Word Count: 1,594
Y/N was getting over stimulated in the changing room at the department store, she had to have tried on at least a dozen of them, none of them were right. Luigi had informed her that his prep school, Gilman, was having an alumni night and he wanted her to accompany him. Luigi, being the planner that he was, told her enough time in advance about the event.
But Y/N being who she is, procrastinated till the last second about buying a dress for the event. Every time she tried to think about what she should fear to a fancy prep school alumni night, she would get overwhelmed and push it to the back of her mind. She regrets doing that now, as she stood in front of the full length mirror, twisting her body back and forth, in the last dress.
It was a black velvet floor length fitted gown, that was off the shoulder and long sleeved. She felt confident in it, but she wasn't sure. She had never been to an alumni event, let alone for a prestigious school. She wasn't sure if she was doing too much or not enough.
She was sure some would be sporting the most expensive and luxurious, not that she cared about gaining their approval or fitting in necessarily, she just didn't want to embarrass Luigi. This was his old prep school, where he graduated as valedictorian and gave a speech.
Maybe there was a little part of her deep deep down that wanted their approval. Luigi wasn't like them he didn't care about having the fanciest clothes, shoes, or displaying wealth in anyway. But this was Luigi's life, this is where he came from, how he grew up. When she met his family and his extended family a year into their relationship, she was excited.
It went well, his mom and dad were very kind and welcoming, they made her feel like she was a part of the family. His sisters were kind, asked questions, and seemed genuinely interested in getting to know her. Some of Luigi's aunts and uncles were a bit passive aggressive when talking to her. When they asked about her profession and she responded they gave her a patronizing smile and replied with a pat to her shoulder, "Luigi has always had such high standards, you must be very special".
She could see it in their face when she talked about her upbringing her attending public school her whole life, working two jobs to pay for her public university degree, and her humble profession that wasn't traditionally seen as "important" like being a doctor or engineer. That night did change something in her, it ripped at her self-esteem, it made her feel like she wasn't good enough for Luigi. She never really told him about the conversations because she didn't want to cause issues between them and his family.
When she was away from his family, she forgot about the feeling, but when she was near them, the feelings resurfaced. Luigi never made her feel like she wasn't good enough, if anything, he motivated her. He is always the first to celebrate her successes at work like when she got a promotion, he brought home flowers and dessert. He is her biggest cheerleader.
As she continued to examine the dress in the mirror, she facetimed Luigi to get a second opinion. When he responded he was laying on the couch in their apartment, a huge smile on his face.
"Hey baby, how's the shopping going? Did you find a dress?" he asked.
Y/n flipped the camera so that it was now showing her body. "What do you think of this one?" she asked.
Luigi sat up at full attention to examine the dress and give an opinion, "W-wow, I love it you look beautiful Y/N".
Y/N blushed and sighed in relief because she did not want to spend any longer in the department store. "Are you sure? Is it appropriate for a Gilman alumni event?"
"I think so, I don't think there's a dress code," he said.
"I just don't want to stick out like a sore thumb," Y/N said.
"You're definitely going stand out," he replied flirtatiously wiggling his eyebrows.
Y/N rolled her eyes, "Okay, I'm getting the dress. See you in a bit Lu." He laughed at her reaction and said, "Bye beautiful!"
*************
Y/N and Luigi were in the car on their way to the alumni event, Luigi had his hand on Y'N's thigh as he drove. She had been silent the entire drive. He squeezed her thigh gently to get her attention, "Are you alright? You've been quiet." he said. She looked over at him, he looked so handsome dressed in his suit. He had a concerned look on his face as he turned his head to pay attention to the road. "I'm fine, just a bit nervous, you know how I get at gatherings." she replied softly reaching to grab his hand and intertwine their fingers.
He brought her hand to his mouth kissing it, "I know, if you need to step out at any point, you give me the signal and we're out of there" he replied.
"What's the signal?" she asked.
"How about itching your nose?" he responded.
"Yeah let me just pick nose in front of all your former classmates and teachers, that'll be a great first impression," Y/N replied sardonically "Maybe the signal could be me telling you I want to leave."
"Perfect," he said a smirking.
********
They had been at the event for about 45 minutes now, Luigi had introduced you to his former classmates, who were quick to share embarrassing stories about Luigi during his time at Gilman. Y/N was having a great time, everyone was nice and very welcoming. She didn't feel like she was out of place, they weren't snobs or turning up their nose at her. That was until she met a former classmate of Luigi's named Bradley, who began asking questions about where you went to school. A small group had formed, Bradley and his date, a beautiful blonde who when Y/N smiled at her, looked her up and down, and looked away as if she weren't standing in front of her.
A few other former classmates who were on the robotics team with Luigi. "I actually went to a very different school than Gilman's, we didn't have all these fancy clubs and facilities that you all have," she replied. Bradley asked, "Well, what school did you go to?" he asked. Y/N stumbled a bit on her words now feeling the weight of everyone's stares, "I-I went to a public school, we didn't have very many clubs or opportunities that you guys had, you guys are lucky. It must be nice to have had that experience." Y/N replied. Bradley snorted, "I guess, it's not that big of a deal. But wait till you see the toilets their self-flushing, I bet your public school didn't have that."
Luigi saw Y/N's face fall as she turned to leave, not before she heard him call Bradley a "fucking dick". Y/N made her way to the car and could hear Luigi right behind her. She went to open the door, but he stopped her. "Baby, I'm sorry he said that. He's always been an asshole even when we were at school together." She just shrugged her shoulders, "It's fine, I'm used to it at this point." she replied. Luigi pushed her chin gently upwards so that he could look at her, "What do you mean you're used to it?" he asked. Y/N told him about how she felt and what was said by his extended family to her, Luigi was patiently listening to her as she told him everything.
"Lu, sometimes I feel like I don't deserve to be with you. That you deserve to date another person who did the prep school thing, who has an important and well-respected career, and who went to an ivy. That's not me, I'm not that. I'm not a part of your world, I don't fit in." she let out the breath she'd been holding, it felt good airing this out and expressing how she felt.
"I don't want to date someone who grew up like me. Even growing up around this, I never felt like I fit in with them even back then. Baby, I love you so much. Don't let these assholes make you feel like you're not important or that you don't deserve to be here, you do. I am so lucky that I get to call you mine, I want you and only you. You are important, what you do is important, and I don't care if you grew up rich or not. That shit doesn't matter to me." Luigi rubbed his thumb back and forth across her cheek and leaned down to kiss her lips, softly and slowly.
He pulled away, smiling down at her. "You are so intelligent-" kiss "You are so kind" - kiss "You are important" -kiss "You are beautiful" -kiss "I am so lucky" -kiss "That I" -kiss "Am in your life" -kiss "And I am so lucky that I get to call you mine" -kiss.
"I love you Y/N" whispered.
"I love you Luigi" you whispered back.
He kissed you one last time, rubbing his thumb on your bottom lip, the biggest smile plastered on his face and he admired you. "Let's get the hell out of here."
#luigi mangione smut#luigi mangione fanfiction#luigi mangione x reader#luigi mangione#luigi#luigi mangione fluff#luigi mangione x yn#luigi mangione imagine#luigi mangione request#luigi mangione blurb#luigi mangione fanfic
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You do understand that every human has like... hundreds of mutations?
Also ah yes, because they're "often feminine" that makes them no ambigious genitalia, what did any of this prove exactly?
But hey, progress, mutations, not disroders, oop no you did it again
Gotta ask there buddy, are different coloured eyes also disorders? Is having light skin also a disorder? Those are mutations too lol, some of them real far back and real significant mutations
Because like, that's how you get literally everything, you don't get to pretend like mutations mean you can discount the human being
And even if we put aside these more notable disorders, the natural variation in this "developmental pipeline" is uh, pretty sever and significant since there are literally always some degree of change, and it's never in one direction or the other, also calling it a pipeline is extra funny, it's more like a tangled web, every single embryo starts female and goes through almost a pinball like back and forth process of development, say you're trying to develep a typical female with all typically female sex characteristics, what you get is an actual mess as some of the results of the xx chromosome code for male development that then other process intentionally have to override or proteins have to stop it from getting to it's required receptors, sometimes you even have that doubled up, where they code for female development but proteins try to override that and other proteins have to override them to avoid that, and you get a certain percentage of both going through and a natural amount of stem cells with completely different chromosomes from your parents, and even more absolute mess
It's cute you think the human body is a functional thing that always does what it's supposed to, but in reailty it literally never does, you have parts of your development that are female, every female has parts of their development that are male and it's literally entirely random as a few thigns ALWAYS go wrong, 100% of the time lol
See that's what happens when you have a fuck ton happening at once
Here's a lil source for that, y'know, from scientific american, a super respected jounral, as it talks about exactly this, humans are a complex patchwork, and even within that "small percent" who are intersex (y'know, the entire population of russia's worth) turns out you have a fuck ton of those variations too, everyone has, we're a nightmare of "a little bit of this there, and a little bit of this there, and well here's a bit of development that isn't male OR female, this is just a bit of both or neither at all"
But you desperately cling to your outdated views or reality, as with everything else, your little lies and falsehoods, y'know, the reason you run away from our dms every time I ask you for evidence, because none of what you believe is founded in any form of reality
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it's really fun to read about siffrin through someone else's perspective because he's the cool mysterious sidekick archetype, and he acts outwardly fine like he has everything put together... but he actually has a bunch of internalised issues. and you didn't notice any of it, or you did but just waved it away because it didn't seem like a pressing issue.
but suddenly they explode out of nowhere and have a terrible mental breakdown and their issues come to the forefront and you find out that they were significantly less fine than you thought? the time loop traumatized them badly and gave them a bunch of issues sure but it also happened in the first place as a result of their other preexisting issues that you, once again, did not notice, or did not put much mind to.
and now you know that he's really good at hiding things that bother him and is terribly allergic to communication. even though he's trying hard now to be better, it can't be easy for him, and it's like... he's communicating about a specific issue he has, but you know at the back of your mind that behind that one issue he's communicating about there are probably dozens of other issues of varying degrees of severity that he's keeping to himself.
and on the flipside there are also a bunch of little things that siffrin does that they get really embarassed or aggravated over. but from an outsider's perspective it's just the cutest thing ever. they're screaming and crying in their head like why did i do that!!! are you stupid!!! that was so embarassing!!! but the other person just gets endeared about it
idk i think that this gap between what we know about siffrin and his thought processes, and how he outwardly acts and is perceived by others who do not know what is going on inside of their head, is something that is really interesting to explore
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Saw you did a wipe of the asks, so I thought I’d send this in again!!! The little guys arrived and I love them so very much (Pardon the messy desk lol, but I got the rare Oppy!!! He’s so shiny!!!) Could we get some Swerve, Ironhide, or Cliffjumper crumbs, oh mighty Revel??? Much love!!! 🥰♥️
So cute! Sure, I’m still stuck at home sick, so I’ll see if I can get some updates done
Hold Me Down Pt 6
Ironhide x Reader
• What is this now? The seventh time he's heard you rustling around over there? Tossing and turning tangled in all your sheets on your little bed. Every time he's almost in recharge, you start making noise again. "Alright, what's your malfunction over there?" He demands, sitting up and scowling over at you. "Because trust me, you're not going to like me if you don't let me recharge, darlin'." And your little head comes up, hair all over the place as you glare at him and yank a pillow over your head. Shaking off the errant thought that you look almost cute half awake and angry, he vents. No. Absolutely not. You're not going to ignore him and keep him online all night. He has too much work to do.
• You hear him slide off his berth and the heavy sound of his peds approaching. And you try to hang onto your pillow when he tugs it away and frowns down at you. Why is he such a jerk? "I can't sleep when it's this cold!" Grabbing a blanket and tugging it over your head, you wait for him to drop your pillow on you and go away. What is it in here? Fifty degrees? Colder? Maybe he's trying to slowly kill you with hypothermia. No, you're pretty sure it needs to be colder for that. This is just him being awful. Making you miserable.
• Cold? Now that he thinks about it, Wheeljack had mentioned the humans were a bit funny about temperature. He'd also said his likes to sprawl on him to sleep otherwise they're too cold. Oh, for Primus's sake. Annoyed, he grabs you and your blankets, ignoring your angry squawking as he lays back down and plunks you on his chassis. "There. Warm," he growls as you just gape down at him in offense. And bean him in the face with a pillow. "Lay down and recharge already."
• "Sleep," you immediately correct him as he shutters his optics to ignore you. "I want my pillow back." There's no way he's already out that fast, he's just ignoring you. Inhaling, you crawl up his chassis and stretch out against his chin to reach your pillow where it had landed on his cheek. And he vents against your belly when your shirt rides up, one optic opening to watch you. Shuddering, you refuse to let him know how off balance you are. Draping your arms on his chin, you boost yourself up so he can see you better. "Night baby, I loathe you," you whisper, leaning forward to press a kiss against his bottom lip before picking your way back down to your blankets.
• Frozen in shock, he's half tempted to roll on his side and dump you off of him. You have no idea what loathing is. How much he despises being saddled with a little brat like you. Think you've won, don't you? That you can do whatever you want with impunity because you're so little and helpless. Darlin,' if you want a war, you're going to get one. Denta working his bottom lip, he's absolutely not thinking about the way your soft mouth had felt pressed against his.
Previous
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get to know college!basketball!captain!rafe
college!basketball!captain!rafe who has loved sports since he was a kid, fell in love with basketball when he was around 10 and took it seriously from that moment on. he wants to go professional after college if he can but is also working on his finance and administration degree. He has always been very smart and doesn’t worry a lot about grades but understands the importance of them, reason why he got a full ride in college and got recruited for the basketball team. who is very disciplined with everything that he does, once he commits to doing something he will do it and will do his best. he loves going out with his friends but also likes to stay in, secretly he loves cooking all thanks to his mom and his sister.
college!basketball!captain!rafe who is very cocky and a flirt, knows he is good-looking and that’s the reason why everyone thinks he’s a player, he has never had a girlfriend in college. Everyone seems to know him and or fall for him, he doesn’t really care about it but it boosts his ego. He has been around a bit yes, but not as much as people think, he is picky even if he doesn’t like to admit it. He thrives on teasing people, especially his friends but he’s also very kind and intentional, not everyone gets to see this side of him. His family is very important to him, he has a good relationship with his parents and sister.
college!basketball!captain!rafe who is very easy to please, just some good food, music, and his friends and he can be the happiest man alive. who loves watching movies and of course, never misses one basketball game, usually watches them with his dad or his friends, it’s his favorite thing to do. Has never missed one basketball practice since he was 10, just the very counted times he has been sick. His love language is physical touch, gifts, and acts of service the last two he prefers giving them than receiving them. Quality time could be added to but in very specific scenarios. His favorite artists are J. Cole, The Weekend, and Kanye. who is also a dog guy, every time he sees a dog he asks if he can pet them.
college!basketball!captain!rafe who loves being an older brother but sometimes he wishes the age gap wasn’t that big, fortunately, he has a cousin his age who might as well be his sister. they grew up together and are kinda inseparable thanks to that. He usually goes to her to talk about his feelings, since he knows he won’t get judged by her. he’s not the best at showing his feelings, or so he thinks, usually his eyes speak volumes, and anyone can see it but him. no, but really, talking about how he feels sometimes can be the hardest thing he can do. he tends to put everyone first and even if he’s this confident guy when it comes to his feelings he’s anything but.
college!basketball!captain!rafe who is incredibly perceptive about how other people feel as long as the feelings are not directed at him because then he’s blind. who likes to take time to get to know someone and help as much as he can. who also can easily get angry when things don’t go his way and when this happens he prefers not to talk to people in case he says something he doesn’t really mean. If he’s really frustrated he tends to isolate himself to calm down but if he needs to talk to people he will be very cold towards them, and he immediately regrets it.
authors note: i always have trouble writing intros because i don't know what you should know before reading and what you should discover while reading but i finally finished it. i'm very obsessed with him, and i hope you guys too :)
taglist: @zyafics @maybankslover @niaunoffical @marleymarleymarleymarley @rafesbabygirlx @akobx @papercranesandinkstains @masonmountme69 @winterivory if you want to be added send an ask or comment! :)
REBLOGS, COMMENTS AND LIKES ARE ALWAYS WELCOMED
INTHELIBRARYBTW ✧.*
#inthelibrarywrites#YWMTP?#introduction#college!basketball!captain!rafe#rafe cameron x reader#college au#college athlete#rafe cameron#rafe x reader#rafe fluff#rafe cameron fluff#rafe fic
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Also? This is a ridiculous comparison.
I’m a classically trained musician, I took opera lessons in college, I was in jazz band and did musical pits. I play 15 instruments. I’m from a family of musicians and music teachers. Most of my friends are musicians who either attempted or got music degrees, or they are at least trained musicians. I have maybe two friends that don’t play instruments.
Musicians ABSOLUTELY get distracted by the theory of the music they’re listening to. I have several songs I listen to ONLY because I love to analyze the bass line or I think the harmonies are fantastic. I absolutely get distracted analyzing the structure and form of music, it would be bizarre to have all this training and not do so? That’s also one way to get better at what you do, is to really understand the structure and form of a piece. One of the most common ways for young/self trained musicians to learn is playing along with music, which requires analysis and teaches you structure. Learning “oh I don’t like songs written like this” or “I don’t like how he returns to that chord” or “this sounds dissonant” is like…..yeah musicians do that??? And writers should too? If you don’t analyze the form of other writers how are you going to know what you liked to read or what you don’t want to do?????
So yeah Mr. HIV Doctor was asking a reasonable question and your professor seems kinda weird.
okay sorry, one other thing annoyed me about that writing class. one of the students is this super clean-cut doctor who works at an HIV clinic, and he asked the prof "do you ever get distracted while reading books, because you find yourself analyzing the craft of them instead of sinking into the story?"
and she said "no," and turned away. and the whole class laughed awkwardly, bc it was a pretty abrupt and dismissive answer. so then she turned back to him and said "you wouldn't ask a musician if they get distracted listening to songs. they just enjoy the music."
but I dunno, I'm a newbie writer with only one (scheduled-to-be-published) book under my belt, but I get distracted sometimes when I'm reading. if I find I'm not sinking into a block of text, I'll squint at it and be like "okay, they're using too much passive voice, that's why my brain isn't grabbing on to it." so I'm sorry Mr. HIV doctor, I thought your question was reasonable!
#also I’m a writer?? I’m not a published writer or anything like that it’s just a little side hobby I’m not very good#but even as a shitty hobby writer I get distracted by form sometimes when I’m reading.#I can’t fathom why he would say that 😭😭😭
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Is it bad for a person with a vagina to not wear underwear? I mean presuming that they’re wearing something that won’t go flashing their bits at people???
I’ve struggled with finding underwear comfortable under certain layers (like stockings and underwear is a sensory nightmare, similar with leggings or other tight bottoms) and my mom would always tell me not wearing underwear is how you get yeast infections plus it’s bad for your body to be cold on your period (but secretly I think she was just pissed I was using tampons and not pads)
well actually an overgrowth of yeast is how you get yeast infections and whether or not you wear underwear has nothing to do with that. tight clothing trapping moisture and bacteria in the folds of the vulva can actually slightly increase the risk of an infection, which is why breathable underwear is so highly recommended. which isn't to say that going around minus underwear will PREVENT yeast infections or anything, but it's certainly not going to hurt. as for the cold thing, while a snowy winter can (but does not always) impact the menstrual cycle in some ways, including heavier cramps, whether or not you wear underwear isn't going to make much different when it's five degrees outside.
tl;dr sorry your mom is full of shit, do whatever you want.
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This one goes out to all the bitches who love some good Safehouse Era Horror. It's me, I'm bitches. I want Jon and Martin to be fucked up and eldritch but I want them to be fucked up and eldritch and loved
(Notes under the cut because I can't help myself. Heads up, I do go into some detail of how Jon gets injured so I can explain my thought process for how I designed his scars. All canon-typical and fairly clinical in tone.)
Here's how I picture Safehouse Jon!
He doesn't need glasses anymore by this point, so he should just be wearing empty frames, but I drew this before I settled on my glasses headcanons. This drawing looks better with the reflection anyways.
He hasn't gotten a haircut since before his promotion to Head Archivist. He doesn't love the weight of it on his neck, but he also uses it to fidget, and he really doesn't want to go through the whole process of cutting it. He's disliked haircuts since he was a kid (People: Bad. Small talk: Bad. Touching: Bad. Loud sounds: Bad. People talking all at once: Bad) and since his time with the Circus he's only grown more reluctant to go and get it done.
At this length his hair is naturally pretty curly but he is. Not taking care of it. I actually put a lot of effort into trying to make it look brittle and tangled (I have a lot of experience lol, my hair is quite thick and I've always hated taking care of it. Yes I am also projecting my feelings about going to a hairdressers onto him why do you ask.)
The various scars were a bit of a strange task, but anyone who has seen my takes on The Bad Kids knows I'm not averse to selective realism in my fiction. Easiest one was the neck, I always pictured Daisy making a vertical cut based on "through the voice box". The larynx is longer than it is wide, so I think Daisy would go for the method that dealt damage across the largest total surface area. Yes I am aware that I'm speaking the same way Martin does when he explains his corkscrew.
The worm scars were easy because I barely drew any. There are a few marks on his cheek, but they're just surface bites. I picture most of his encounter with Prentiss showing on his legs, particularly on the right side, with enough damage there that he starts using a cane after the incident to keep weight off his right leg. More research to be done on this particular detail.
Finally the burn on his hand from Jude. This was the weirdest one to figure out just because of the nature of the injury. How do you quantify the damage done to an epidermis by a living manifestation of sometimes-boiling wax that can heat and cool at will? I settled on it being a second-degree burn that healed supernaturally fast, containing the damage to the space Jude had direct contact with. He'd probably have some mobility issues there as well. I know there are ways to help with mobility and pain after a severe burn, but I don't know how much of it Jon would actually. Do. Like I said, definitely further research to be done on these last two.
Hey so I'm gonna ask you to stop and consider the horror of the watcher. The helplessness. The guilt. The inherent terror of being a spectator, a participant by proximity but not by action. The horror of not being able to look away, of being a bystander. Jon forgets to blink sometimes. But wouldn't it be so much worse if there were no eyelids at all? That's how I interpret the description of The Archivist being "All Eyes" :D
I love a good Many-Eyed Jon, so I whipped up my own interpretation here. I think the more he Becomes the more he starts to resemble the thing from the dreams. He has a lot more control of it in S5, but it still creeps up on him and he has to consciously go back to a human shape.
#coffeepaintart#jonathan sims#jon sims#tma#the magnus archives#scopophobia#scopophobia tw#tw scopophobia#the archivist#tma fanart#tma art#if i need to tag any other tws or cws lmk
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babe. here you are. posting the exact kind of shit that got me pissed off in the first place and u had to get weirdly racist there at the end too. if neil gaiman wasn't a piece of shit rapist, amanda palmer (who's degree of complicity is debatable) wouldn't have anyone to enable. you spent your entire unnecessary fucking comment blaming the woman and didn't mention actual rapist neil gaiman by name one time. also. like. do u understand how child custody agreements work? when that child is in his father's custody he isn't his mother's responsibility and if she wanted to alter that agreement, she'd have to go to court with firm proof, and men win custody over women to a shocking degree when they actually fight for it. especially if they're rich and famous. this man wouldn't finalize a divorce from a wife who wanted out and you think for one second he wouldn't have retaliated by suing for full custody? i Wish I were so naive. you call yourself a feminist and yet here you are, blaming a woman for a man's evil. go fuck yourself.
i don't wage war in the comment section very often. but sometimes i get pissed off.
#it's really very simple#all these problems could have been avoided if neil gaiman wasn't a rapist#I dont care about anything else#I'll criticize Amanda palmer to hell and back as soon as the actual rapist faces a true and final reckoning
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I’ve seen some people try to explain the failed hand holding as the paps are constantly taking photos and it’s just one in motion. But here’s the thing, and this is for today and back in June, if you were trying to sell a couple as being super loved up together wouldn’t you use the best photos of them to do so? Not someone whose hand is so tense and straight it looks like his veins are about to burst through his skin?
This is an old ask btw.
But yes, I would use the best pics possible and I always wonder…are these the best you have?
Why do we have pictures that have continuously left us all wondering what is truly going on here?
That doubt has fueled this fire. I think, to a certain degree, that was part of the goal. I think they’ve intentionally left it somewhat ambiguous and those who get it, get it.
Those who don’t are in my inbox calling me a maggot and shit talking everyone who doesn’t agree with them 🤷🏻♀️
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