#but i remember listening to the song was what broke me. And I mean.. huh.

[ryukatters]

it's your fault for loving me — y. okkotsu ⁺˚⋆｡°✩

⟡ pairing: yuuta okkotsu x fem!reader

⟡ cw: /DARK CONTENT, /yandere! yuuta, /dubcon, /NONCON, ex-bf!yuuta, stalking, he breaks into your apartment, he /manhandles you (he’s strong), /implied babytrapping, /possessiveness, MINORS DNI

⟡ wc: 2.9k (someone sedate me)

⟡ song inspo: language by brent faiyaz

⟡ summary: Your ex boyfriend breaks into your apartment. What do you mean he needs to leave? He’s staying right here.

The slow, muffled drag of your feet ricochet off the hallway walls as you trudge along to your apartment. You fumble with your keys for a little bit, but find no resistance as you insert it into the slot. 

“Huh, that’s odd…I could’ve sworn I locked it.”

You chalk it up to exhaustion. You're only practically ever home to sleep due to the way you've been throwing yourself onto mission after mission. Even now, sleep is a luxury you can barely afford. You kick off your shoes lazily, not bothering putting them in their rightful place on the shoe rack. 

Maybe before, you would have cared more about keeping the house tidy. Or maybe before, your loving boyfriend would pamper and coddle you the minute you opened the front door, so you never had to worry about the little details like putting your shoes in the right place.

You were exhausted. 

You wanted nothing more than to wash up and plop down onto your soft, soft bed. You don’t even make it to your bedroom door before you pause, anxiety prickling your nerves. 

You sense him before you see him. Yuuta’s cursed energy has always had a tendency to seep out whenever he was around you. Whether it’s a testament to how he’s able to fully relax in your presence or a display of raw power, you’re not sure. 

"You're home," a certain black-haired sorcerer chirps. "How was your mission?"

In the past, simply hearing Yuuta’s voice would be enough to melt away the pent up stress from a hard day of exorcizing curses. It’d soothe your aching muscles and tired soul as you let yourself be enveloped by the weight of his affection. But right now, it did everything except that. 

The shiver of excitement that used to run down your spine is replaced by trepidation caused by the only person who used to be able to comfort you. 

You know better than to ask how he knew you were on a mission, much less ask how he managed to break into your apartment. It seems he's been in here for a while, with the way he seems to have made himself at home on your bed, much like the way he used to before. 

"Why are you here?"

The question makes him sit up. 

“Because I missed you. Is that so bad?”

You want to laugh. The whole situation is all sorts of fucked up, and the two of you are talking about it the same way one would the weather.

“Yuuta, we broke up 2 months ago,” you press, vexation lacing your words. You could never imagine yourself using that tone on him. Yuuta’s always been so meticulous in loving you, in making sure you were happy.  He’s never given you a reason to be upset with him. But that was then, and this was now. 

You could say whatever you wanted to say. You were tired and definitely not in the mood to deal with a supposed burglar that happens to be in the form of your ex-boyfriend.

“I don’t remember agreeing to that,” he says simply.

“You walked out on me!”

“Because I thought you needed some space. And now I’m back. But I never said we were breaking up.” 

Space was an extremely generous term for what Yuuta gave you. If you could consider watching your every move from a distance, keeping tabs on who you talk to, and making sure you stay out of trouble secretly, “space.” He would never let you know that though. It’s too much, too soon.

He couldn't help it, not when his precious baby could get hurt. He’d never forgive himself if that happened.

“Come and sit, my love. You look so tired.” He pats the space next to him. You will your heart not to flutter at the familiar nickname. 

Your body moves before your brain can catch up. It’s almost like listening to him was muscle memory. You pause in your step, cross your arms, and glare at him. 

“Leave, Yuuta. I don’t want to see you.” The words rise from the very depths of your soul and spill out of your mouth like bile, burning and spiteful. It hurts to speak to him like this, even after he’d abandoned you with no hopes of return. 

“Sit, love.” A little more demanding this time. “I’m not repeating myself again.” 

The tension in the air is palpable, so thick you can cut it with a knife.

You take a seat. Yuuta doesn’t miss a beat before he has his hands on you. 

“Missed you,” his hand reaches out to cup your jaw, thumb rubbing against the plushness of your cheek. 

You’ve always been so soft, it’s one of the things Yuuta loves the most about you. 

You flinch. Blame it on the adrenaline coursing through your body like wildfire. Your fight or flight response is shot. Yuuta’s touch seems to rewrite everything that’s been hardwired into your brain. 

He presses a chaste kiss to your temple, before moving down to kiss the tip of your nose, and both of your cheeks. Each press of his lips leaves feels like it’s being seared into your flesh, a metaphorical branding iron of sorts— to show that you’re Yuuta’s and Yuuta’s only. 

Your mind goes blank when he sucks a kiss into the side of your neck, whimpering pathetically as he grazes his teeth along the sensitive skin. 

“We can’t do this,” you assert, but the words get stuck in your throat, so it comes out more as a whiny sigh. Your body seems to have a tendency to betray you when it comes to him.

“But we can,” Yuuta coos, pushing you down until your back is flat against the mattress. He takes both of your hands in his, lifting them up until they’re above your head, effectively pinning you in place. “We’re doing it right now, aren’t we?” 

Yuuta can appear pretty unassuming to outsiders. He’s quiet, reserved, almost meek. If one were to take a closer look, however, they’d realize that beneath that unostentatious front was a more commanding aura, one that forces you to submit to his whims with his sweet tongue and sensuous touches. Perfectly calculated, perfectly executed. 

"I fucking hate you,” you spit, thrashing against his hold, but to no avail. 

"No you don't,” Yuuta shuts you down with conviction. Like it’s the absolute truth— the kind that can’t be twisted or broken. It almost feels like he’s chastising you for thinking otherwise. “Take that back right now.”

To be honest, hearing those words stung more than any physical blow you could have ever landed on him. Has he not shown you enough love? Or have you already forgotten? 

Isn’t what you have pure love? 

A hand wraps around your neck, lithe fingers inching up before they grip your jaw, forcing you to look at him.  “I said,” blunt fingernails digging into your skin, “take it back.”

You sputter out an apology with teary eyes, an odd mix of humiliation and regret seeping into your bones, stomach swirling with shame and to your horror, a tinge of anticipation. 

It’s pathetic, really, how easily you give in. 

“Now give me a kiss, sweetheart.” Yuuta bridges the gap between the two of you. He presses his already throbbing bulge against your clothed pussy, moaning into your mouth appreciatively.

You feel so dizzy you think you might explode. 

Yuuta makes quick work of the buttons on your uniform, releasing your wrists so he can throw the offending garment and all your underthings beneath it to some random corner of the room. 

Calloused hands roam your body, squeezing and groping, as if to map out the cartography of your flesh, committing each peak and valley to memory. He watches in fascination how your skin bristles with goosebumps in the wake of his touch. 

He ignores your pleading cries and attempts to push him off. Yuuta is being driven by pure instinct alone. That sick, twisted voice in his head that he’s always tried to suppress whispers. It goads him on to take what he wants, to make sure you remember that you’re his, and his alone. 

He knows that you haven’t been seeing anyone. You were always so loyal, even when you were upset with him. Anyone who did try was taken care of the minute they left your sight. 

It’s been far too long since he’s had you. His desire fills him with a sort of quiet rage, one that metamorphoses into something darker, more sinister and morose the longer he goes without you. Almost like a curse that’s gone far too long without feeding. 

Yuuta Okkotsu loves you to the point of madness.

He thinks he might literally implode in on himself any second longer without you.

It’s almost laughable how different the two of you are. An ethereal beauty too good for this world, yet here you were in between the legs of a cursed man with too much love than he knows what to do with. 

“Yuuta, please,” you cry out. You flail your legs in an attempt to kick Yuuta off. He catches both with ease, throwing them over his shoulder to slide your bottoms off, leaving you completely bare. 

He can’t suppress the groan that tumbles past his lips. You’re even more beautiful than he remembers. 

You’re dewy eyed and gasping, nails clawing at his forearms and beating at his chest in a last ditch effort to stand your ground. Nothing can deter him. 

Yuuta could easily heal himself if he wanted to. But the angry red welts and blossoming hues of purple on his pale skin are a badge of honor of the utmost prestige. It’s undeniable proof that you’re real, that his love for you isn’t just a fragment of his imagination, and that none of this was just some pipe dream. He could take a little pain if that meant you got to be his. 

He’s always been yours without any reservations. 

“You can cry if you want, if it helps,” he says genuinely, but the gleam in his eyes shifts into something predatory. “But you should know you’re really fucking wet.” As if to prove a point, he slowly fucks his middle finger into your weeping hole, then his index, then his ring. They curl up to rub against that spongy spot just the way you like. 

You let out a sharp gasp, spine arching off the mattress. 

You tried to ignore him—detach yourself from the whole situation, let him get his fill, and be done with this whole ordeal. But it’s Yuuta— the man has a grasp on both the corporal and spiritual parts of you that you can’t bring yourself to understand. It seems like he knows you better than you know yourself sometimes. And right now, he’s managed to make a home in all five of your senses. There’s no escape. He's made sure of that. 

He pulls out his fingers with a lewd squelch. A clear sheen of liquid coats every digit, stringy as he parts them to show you. He smiles knowingly.

“You keep fighting me, but it turns out you want it after all, sweetheart.” 

Your cheeks burn in humiliation. Whether it’s from the situation at hand or the truth behind his words, you’re not too sure. 

“Don’t you know?” Yuuta rasps, fingers going back to work their way inside you rhythmically, bringing you closer and closer to the precipice, paying special attention to how you try to mask how your face contorts in pleasure. 

He presses his forehead against yours, willing you to look at him wordlessly. “I know what’s best for you. I know what you want. And right now, this little pussy wants to be fucked. Isn’t that right, my love?” 

He’s met with a breathless moan. You’re so close. Tears threaten to fall as your chest heaves in exertion, trying not to teeter off the edge too soon. 

You look so pathetic it’s insane. Yuuta swears he can feel his mouth water in anticipation for what’s bound to come next. He thrusts his fingers with calculating speed and precision, the heel of his palm slapping against your neglected clit just right. 

He leans down right when you cum, lips catching yours as you moan into his mouth. Satisfaction swells in his chest as your slick drips down his wrist. 

“You’re ready.” 

Yuuta unbuttons his pants, pulling it down just enough for his cock to spring free, tip slapping his abdomen as it leaks with precum. He fists it, jerking his hand up and down his length. He slaps it against your clit once, twice, and a third time before he slips it inside your weeping hole. 

Your walls spasm around his cock to accommodate his sheer size and girth, struggling a bit more than usual. You feel so full. It’s been far too long since he’s fucked you. You claw at his lower abdomen, trying to make space between the two of you. It’s all too much, all at once. Yuuta won’t have it. He slips his hands under your sweaty thighs, pinning your ankles on either side of your head, effectively folding you in half. You cry out at the stretch.

“Always take me so well, angel.” 

He sets a steady pace, dragging his cock in, pulling out, and then back in with an absurd amount of force. The sound of skin on skin ricochets against your bedroom walls like a sort of cacophonous symphony. You don’t get the luxury of the sweet, slow thrusts he usually blesses you with, while he coos about how good you are for him. 

“Where’s all that attitude from earlier? Am I making you feel that good?” 

You glower, refusing to acknowledge the fact that your body betrays your mind— that Yuuta’s bringing you closer and closer to nirvana the further he drags you down into hell. 

He slides his hand down your tummy, rubbing your clit in time with his thrusts.

“Yuuta—!” You clench around his length, hurtling towards your second orgasm quickly. 

“You’re so greedy. Cumming again already?” 

He’s met with silence. He’ll forgive your transgressions this time around. He’ll just have to teach you how to be his good girl again. 

A particularly rough thrust has you choking back a moan.

“Thought so. Cum for me, sweetheart.”

Your peak hits you like a crashing wave. Your body tenses, leaving you gasping for air as you clench around Yuuta’s cock. You cry out deliriously, falling apart as Yuuta continues to pound into you. It’s too much, but you can’t pull away even if you tried. You’re stuck.

“I’m the only one that can make you feel this way, understand?” He grits his teeth, staving off his release just a little longer. He fucks you through your orgasm thoroughly as he chases his own. 

He presses all of his body weight on top of you, your legs on either side of his head as he folds you into a mating press. He groans at the change in position, allowing him to fuck into you even deeper. 

Realization cuts through your cloudy judgment like a sword. 

“Yuuta— Yuuta, please. Pull out–!” 

Your pleas fall on deaf ears. He’s rambling now, intoxicated by all you have to offer, yet you’re the one paying the price. The effects of overstimulation are taking over now, your body twitching involuntarily with each thrust. 

“I’m not leaving you, ever. It’s just you and me.” 

You shake your head in objection, mind too hazy to voice out any resistance. Tears well up, threatening to spill from your lash line. 

Yuuta nods with a grin, canines glinting, just like a predator that’s caught its prey. “It’s true, sweetheart. I’ll make sure of it. Say I’m it for you. That I’m the only one.” 

“Say it.” 

“You’re it for me, Yu. The only one.” You babble, tears streaming freely now. 

You feel the moment he reaches his plateau— the way his dick twitches inside of you right before your walls are being painted white with splashes of Yuuta’s hot cum. 

Your fate’s been sealed. 

He fucks into you a few more times, heavy balls slapping against your ass as he rides out his orgasm. A white ring wraps around the base of his cock, the copious amounts of seed he’s poured into you threatening to leak out. 

Yuuta doesn’t bother pulling out. In a quick show of dexterity and freak strength, he manages to flip the both of you so that your positions are switched, with you lying on top of Yuuta’s chest. The steady beat of his heart fills your mind. 

Your entire body is on fire. You feel numb. You let yourself be carried away by the prospect of sleep, hoping that you’ll wake up to find that this was all just some wild fragment of your imagination.  

He presses a hand against your head, like he was afraid you’d pull away and ruin whatever fantasy he’s deluded himself into believing. 

The simple truth is– Yuuta Okkotsu loves you. And he’ll do whatever it takes to make sure that no one else gets in the way of that. 

He runs his hand up and down your bare back lovingly, admiring your spent form. You’ve always been so soft. So pliant, so willing to give in to his desires. 

It’s the thing that Yuuta loves most about you. 

a/n: i had to reupload bc this hellsite sucks. hopefully this shows up in the tags now

tagging @princess-okkotsu again hehe

[throughthebluesea]

I Wanna Ruin Our Friendship

pairing: bada lee x reader

word count: 2.49k

genre: friends to lovers, bada secretly pining over 'straight' reader, howl is a jerk in this fic i am so sorry, i am a fan of his, some angst, slightly suggestive (if you squint), lusher and tatter being so supportive, lusher's gaydar never miss.

den's notes: got this idea from @deathspartner and i hope i gave justice to the prompt. this is inspired by the song jenny by studio killers, the mood maker of this one shot. not proofread, but i hope yall still like it! i might open requests, btw so let me know your thoughts and comments! i really appreciate it!

"i told you, i can't!"

tatter lets out an exasperated sigh for the last time and rolled away from their friend. tatter may have insane patience at times, but this time, she's had it. lusher finds it hilarious, though. their demise is lusher's joy, after all.

bada scowled at the two. at this point, she had given up with her friends. she expects the two to give her the best advice, but all she got were sighs and laughters.

"ssaem, i love you. but i already told you. you're not even sure y/n-ssaem is straight! give it a try!"

"plus, i don't think y/n-unnie is straight. my gay-dar never failed me." lusher adds.

"it's awkward! plus she's my best friend! i can't just barge in and say 'oh! hi my bff y/n! you're so hot and i wanna say i am pining over you since the day we met' randomly. i will look crazy!"

the two younger ones just stared at their mentor, thinking that she's being too pathetic and overthinking everything.

"plus... she's seeing howl." she said with disdain, and she can't hide how her eyes roll in annoyance.

both lusher and tatter knew how down bad bada was towards you, ever since you were introduced as one of the members of team bebe. you two are the same age, with bada older than you by a few days. you always thought that you two were soulmates because of these factors. your friendship started blooming, and the two of you were unstoppable.

sometimes, bada would get you as backup for the choreography drafts she directs, and you would do the same thing when you do your choreography drafts.

dancing became something both of you connect. and it became the turning point of bada's feelings towards you that is beyond borders of friendship began to bloom.

you had this habit of placing a hand on the small of her back, and trust me, bada tries her best not to crumble on the spot out of pure delight and just... her being intensely whipped of her best friend.

bada would think that what she's feeling is bad because... first, she's her best friend, and she remembered one conversation you had at the just jerk family dinner, and you mentioned that you don't see yourself dating girls.

that shit broke her heart. and bada tried to subside her feelings for you. but... she can't help revive such feelings when certain situations arise.

being best friends with you means that you are open to her about all the boys you had slept with. just by hearing your stories, it broke her. right now, you are seeing howl, a colleague of them inside the academy. bada would silently cringe when you told your stories of your moments with howl.

at the back of her mind while listening to you is that she wished it was her hands touching every crevice of her body, feeling every curve you had, the one hearing your voice when you cry out of—

bada shook her head at the thought and sighed. this is probably her fifteenth time sighing. "it's hopeless."

tatter was about to reason out to her usual banter when she heard shouting from outside. the three recognized your voice and howl's.

"and how the fuck am i supposed to react to that, huh?"

"y/n, she is nothing! trust me!"

"trust you?! howl, this is the 3rd time i saw you with moana! and this time, i caught you two smooching each other inside my class studio!"

"moana is just a close friend! y/n, don't let your jealousy take over your senses!"

"I FUCKING DID IT, HOWL. I SET ASIDE MY JEALOUS FEELINGS BECAUSE I TRUST YOU."

the three went silent, and they can hear you sigh. the two looked at bada, who is staring at the door, her hands clenched in anger.

'what the actual fuck, howl? i trusted y/n on you and you will do this shit? also, how did i not know that THAT jerk is doing this to my y/n?!' she thought to herself.

"this isn't working out, howl. let's just end this... i'll just act you're invisible here and just talk to you for purely business only."

she twisted the door knob, entering the studio where the three were in. they scrambled to the side and acted that they're not inside.

you were too into your emotions that you didn't notice the three inside. before howl can barge in and enter, she locked the door and slid down against it.

you listened to him sighing and left the area. the thought of him not even trying to take you back hurted you the most, and tears fell down your cheeks because of it.

the three watched in silence. they felt bad at your broken state, but bada was more hurt. she hates it when you get hurt, and she hates herself for not being there for you when you were suffering.

bada probably hated howl more because she trusted him that you will he taken care of but the fucker chose to break your heart.

tatter pulled out her phone and quickly typed a message directly to bada's phone, and sent it to her.

'time to be y/n-ssaem's knight in shining armor.'

when bada sees the message, she whipped her head towards the younger and glared at her. tatter rolled her eyes and pointed at you, mouthing a 'fucking go, unnie! do it!'

lusher was doing the same thing.

bada sighed quietly and walked towards your weak figure and cleared her throat to get your attention.

you lift your head up and your eyes grew wide at the sight of bada towering you. "b-bada-ya... you were here the whole time?"

she scratches the back of her head and sat beside you. "actually, lusher, tatter and i were here and... we actually heard everything. i'm sorry you had to go through that. howl is such a fucking jerk." she said, gritting her teeth.

lusher and tatter let out noises, agreeing with what the older said, and excused themselves so they can leave the two alone.

"i'm sorry... it's my fault, i trusted him way too much..." you said weakly, and you automatically leaned against her frame. bada's instinct kicked in and hugged her tight. "shh... this is not your fault, okay? if howl had some decency, he wouldn't do this to a pretty girl like you."

just the warmth of her arm around you unlocked more of your tears and you sobbed, and clinged onto her.

bada sighed and stayed silent for you, silently cooing to encourage you to cry and let it all out. she gently stroked the small of your back and stayed there for you.

you would mention something self-deprecating, and bada would dismiss it immediately, reassuring you.

"let's go to your place?" she asks when your hiccups and sobs stopped. you nod, and that's her sign for her to help you up and bring you to her car, and both of you drove to your apartment.

when you've arrived, she never left your side and helped you with everything. and when you settled down your room, bada announced that she's gonna leave her now (because she wanted to give you space, or some moment to clear your thoughts for a good while), but you stopped her.

"stay." you said and looked at her, and she groaned inwardly because she can't say to your boba-like eyes when you want to get something from her. bada obliges and she removed her cardigan first and scooted inside the blanket, hugging you immediately.

she heard you sigh and clinged her arms around you. "thank you, bada... i don't know what to do if you're not here."

she hummed in response, and pulled you closer. eventually the two of you fell asleep.

-

morning came, and bada was the first one to wake up. the sight of you peacefully sleeping dawned her, and she sighed. you're too precious, she thought. she instinctively fixed your bangs, and then she stared at your face.

"you're making it so hard for me not to fall for you, y/n..." she said faintly, "i'm sorry for hiding this. i just don't wanna ruin our friendship, but there's part of me that wants it. i wanna ruin our friendship, y/n. i can take care of you more than howl... let me love you."

she didn't realized that while she was talking, she had her eyes close and her face leaned close to yours. and she didn't notice that you have woken up and were able to hear her 'morning epiphany'.

"is that what you want, bada?" you asked softly.

bada's eyes opened and looked at you, shocked. "y-you heard it...?"

"most of it..."

"shit... i'm sorry." she sits up, and was about to leave your side, but you're too quick and grabbed her wrist, preventing her from leaving.

"why are you apologizing?"

"because... i shouldn't have caught feelings with my best friend... but i can't help it! you were kind, nice, talented, pretty, and most of all, you deserve the world and i wanted to give it to you. but i was afraid to confess because you might end our years of friendship, and i know you're not into girls... now that the truth is out, you will hate me and will cut ties with me... i'm sorry, i will set aside these feelings for you. i don't wanna lose my closest friend."

"i don't wanna lose you."

you noticed that she was looking down while she fiddled her long, slender fingers, something she does when she's nervous or she gets caught in the act when she pulls pranks at your crew.

you smiled at your friend and cupped her cheek, guiding you to look at her. there was this fond smile playing on your lips. "silly, you don't need to cut ties with me, nor set aside your feelings."

bada stared at you as her lips formed to a pout. "what do you mean..."

"i'm sorry i didn't know sooner... the one that understands me and takes care of me was at my side after all."

she stayed silent, and you grew anxious that she's not even reacting. on bada's part, she is trying to process what you said.

"earth to bada lee... did i lost her already?" you asked in a teasing manner. a tinge of light blush graced the latter's cheeks and cleared her throat.

that gesture made you chuckle, and you moved your hand to gently comb her strawberry and black locks. after being frozen for quite awhile, bada pulled your body close and hugged your waist tight. you felt her exhale and that made you smile more.

"i thought you're not into girls..."

what she said had you laughing. "i did say that, but the truth is, i don't see myself dating girls at the moment because of one reason."

bada pulled away and stared at you. lusher's voice echoed on her brain.

"plus, i don't think y/n-unnie is straight. my gay-dar never failed me."

well, her gay-dar didn't fail her at all. shaking the thought off, she squeezed your hand, urging you to continue.

"remember noze?" she nods. "yeah. what about her."

"i used to have this HUGE crush on her. i am head over heels on her. everything that she liked, i try to like what she does, eats, reads... just to get some sort of... good points on her."

bada began to blush, since she can relate to what you told her. she began to use the scent you wore because if felt like you were with her, and she gets validation from you that bada liked what you liked, as well.

she tried exploring on her cafè orders, venturing on the sweeter ones because you liked sweet blends.

all of those are hidden under her intentions of being your 'greatest best friend' image. she hid her pining over you under that image.

"we played a lot, we kissed, just your 'friends with benefits' shit, but when i was about to confess, she confessed that she was dating aiki-ssaem. and asked to stop what we're doing and just stayed at friends..." you continued. bada noticed sadness in your eyes, but you tried to smile.

"that was my first heartbreak... and she was the first female i fell in love with. that time, i realized that maybe liking girls is not for me. because i end up hurting. no one knew that story, you were the first."

bada went silent, but her fingers are still intertwined against your own. you were silent, as well, but minutes later, you were the first to break it.

"you know, the first time i met you, i felt attracted to you... but i got scared. because i might end up heartbroken again."

she looked up at you and saw you staring at her. "i like you, but i am scared, so i tried fooling around with others, trying to remove whatever feelings i have for you, but it reappears as much as i make it disappear."

"i think i still like you..." you confessed. bada gasped, and didn't hesitate to close the distance between you two, cupping both your cheeks and pressed her lips against your own.

your eyes grew wide but slowly flutters close as the hidden feelings took over. same goes with bada, all the feelings she tried to hide, now she pours it on the kiss.

she pulled away and stared at you. "my feelings for you never left, y/n..."

you stared back right into her brown orbs, and tears started forming on the corners of your eyes. bada hushed and wiped the tears away before it even fell. "i promise not to hurt you."

and you believe that. she was there from the beginning, and never left despite everything that happened. the pain from earlier slowly disappeared, and you don't fear what the future is because you have bada on your side. as your best friend, and as your partner... soon.

-

weeks later, things are going well between you and bada, and the rest of team bebe are delighted with the shift. lusher liked the glow that bada exudes during practices. she was more enthusiastic, and she had to thank you for that.

tatter liked your shift from mega depresso mood back to your cheerful and playful self. like bada, you're enthusiastic during practice runs.

but, what both tatter and lusher liked was the shift between you and bada. along with the other team bebe members, they felt love. the glances you two had and the way you two get so touchy (in a non-sexual way, of course.) during breaks. they inwardly groan because they had to endure the love bird moments, but kidding aside, they were glad the finally, they made it in each other's arms.

no more hidden pining, no more secrets.

— fin.

[peachyloveswriting]

Could we get some…..silent treatment headcanons for knives? Like maybe he says something mean or does something mean to the reader and since shes a sassy lady shes like “ok fine! You wanna be that way?” And gives him the silent treatment until he gives her a genuine apology! Shes moving away from him when he sits/stands next to her, avoiding affection from him, stuff like that!

If you dont wanna write that, thats totally fine! I just 1) love soft knives 2) love the way you write him & 3) wanna see what he does when she ignores him for being a meanie head!!

Headcanons? I’m sorry I need you to speak up…oh…I’m afraid I don’t know what those are love~

Silent Treatment…huh? — Millions Knives

Summary: Knives yelled at you during one of his temper tantrums and this resulted in you giving him the silent treatment. Now he’s confused and upset.

“Why aren’t you speaking to me?” Knives voice raised to the lightest degree, wavering anger present in his voice.

You’ve been doing this, this silent treatment all day. He’s tried to talk to you but you ignore him or move to a different room entirely. No he had you cornered in his bedroom and alone. He wanted answers.

“I’ve been trying to speak to you since last night and you won’t even look at me!” He gestured with his hand as he walked closer to you. You only stared at the window in silence.

“I don’t understand if you’re angry at me or if I’ve done something but it’s no reason to not speak to me. Stop being childish and work the problem out instead of treating me like this.” His words came out as a plea. Buried in frustration his voice strained, yet firm.

You still didn’t reply or even look at him. Knives felt defeated, frustrated. Your company and mindless conversations were the only thing he seemed to enjoy. You pulled him away from his mind when he played his songs and you gave him things to think about other than his stupid hatred. For you to ignore him, hurt.

Softly, hands grabbed your hips and pulled you back. He pulls you to him, his chest pressed against your back while his lips brushed against your ear. His hot breath tickled your skin as he spoke.

“Tell me, My Flower, what have I done to upset you.” He says gently. Your heart flutters from the closeness and the way he holds you from behind, yet you still don’t speak. “Please don’t ignore me.”

Soft kisses trail from your jaw to your shoulder, soft and warm. It sends shivers down your spine as one of his hands further wraps around your waist, holding you against him. “I’ll fix any problems you have, Petal. Say the word and your wish is my command.” He softly nuzzled his face into your neck occasionally trailing it with kisses.

You finally broke, a sigh leaving your lips as you placed your hands over his and spoke. “Last night, when you were angry. You remember right?”

He lifts his head, his eyes watching you curiously. You spin around in his arms to face him. “Yes. I remember.” His brows furrow with wonder as he listens closely.

“You yelled at me. I don’t remember what you said but it pissed me off.” You admit.

His eyes flicker with darkness for a moment before he places a soft kiss on your forehead. “I never meant to yell at you.” He places another on your nose. “That’s no excuse.” He kisses your cheekbone. “Let me make it up to you.” Then your lips.

Knives pulls away with a soft, desperate look in his eyes. He holds you gently as you chuckle and smile up at him. Just seeing you smile warms his chest. “Sure. Please don’t do that again.”

He immediately cupped your face with his hands. “I swear. I’ll never let it happen again.” He places another kiss on your lips. Soft and meaningful, before he tugs you with him towards the bed.

“Come. I’ll make sure you feel better.”

[helioslover]

CHERRY - CL16

PAIRING : singer!charles leclerc x actress!reader SUMMARY : you listen to the song charles has written about you for the first time. you hate how in love with him you are. WORD COUNT : 4.4k TW : angst, mentions of alcohol, breakup, sex SONG : cherry - harry style

You hate planes. You also hate being too shy to ask the stewardess for a night mask so that you could sleep through the flight. You hate knowing who’ll be picking you up at the airport. You also hate the way you're happy to see a familiar face in a country where you don’t know anyone, even if it is this familiar face. But you mostly hate the way you're eager to see Charles.

You have spoken a lot through the last few months, and you think that maybe the heartache you've felt for so much time has finally healed. Charles' has been staying in Monaco -he now splits his time between there and London - for a couple of weeks as he is recording some new songs for the next album. As unbelievable as it sounds, you have meticulously avoided any of Charles' new songs until now. The only one you're familiar with is Sixteen but you know that title tracks aren’t the ones Charles puts his entire soul in. You aren't ready to hear the brown-haired boy that used to drive you crazy sing about another woman. Yes, you've seen the pictures of Charles and Alexandra and yes, you've cried in your pillow until your body felt so dry that there were no tears left to cry.

“What do you mean you’ve never listened to my songs ever since we broke up ?” Charles had looked so shocked when you told him the truth (not the part about crying yourself to sleep, no, you didn’t mention this) that you had laughed. “Not even the ones from Fast Cars ? We were still talking when I released Fast Cars, Y/N !” His voice sounded raspy and you remembered that it was still early and that Charles had never been a morning person.

“Why are you up so early ?” you were clearly trying to avoid the subject.

“You called me, you idiot. I only answered because it was you. But now, I’m considering the option of hanging up. I mean… I’m not trying to brag but where were you for the last four years ? My songs have been everywhere.”

You chuckled. “Oh for fuck’s sake, I know that. You have no idea how annoying it is to avoid your songs at parties, on the radio, on TV, everywhere, you’re fucking everywhere, dude.”

“Don’t dude me. I think we're a bit closer than that, Y/N.” He was smiling at the camera, showing off his dimples. Behind him was a patchwork of photos, posters and movie tickets hanging on a beige wall. You tried to imagine the rest of the room. “Don’t think I’m forgetting what you just admitted. Mon Dieu,” he sighed overdramatically, “how would you react if I said I never watched any of your movies, huh ?”

You rolled your eyes. “I never said that I didn’t know any of your songs, Charles. I know some of them. But, I hate saying this, I kind of did not want to hear you sing about other people. See what I mean ? It’s alright when it’s from a time where you didn’t even know I existed, I mean some of yours are probably part of my favourite songs, but not when it’s- not when I-”.

“When what, Y/N ?” Charles asked, his voice softened as if he understood how hurt you would feel by hearing songs that weren’t about you.

“Nothing, just leave it. And don’t even try to pretend you’ve seen all of the things I act in. I’m pretty sure you haven’t heard about half of them.”

Charles was now smiling again. “I’ve seen all of them, Y/N. And you were good in every single one of them.”

Something broke inside of your heart because Charles' voice sounded like a warm hug. His statement somehow seemed like a proof that you weren’t the only one to find it hard to get rid of what you felt. And somehow, you hated it. “I gotta go. See you.” And you hung up. You were feeling too many things at the same time. You hated it.

You hate delay. Your plane hasn’t taken off yet and you're already bored. Your neighbor looks like he could be somewhere between fifty and eighty-four and it’s too cloudy to see anything through the window. Your book is not as interesting as it looked like and you know you haven’t downloaded enough playlists. You hate it, not knowing what to do.

You checks your phone to see if Charles has seen your previous message, warning him about your flight being late.

‘its ok, ill still pick you up, y/nickname.’

You smile. Even after all this time, you still don’t know if you hate or loves it when Charles uses your nickname. Another text appears on the screen.

‘since you have time, listen to my favourite one.’

There’s a link leading to a Spotify song and you download it, right before the pilot finally announces that the plane is about to take off. You put on your headphones, press play and instantly, as the first notes of the guitar resonate in your ears, cry.

Don't you call him baby [...] Don't you call him what you used to call me

The first time you called Charles baby wasn’t intentional. You recall the exact moment it slipped out of you mouth and the look Charles gave you after. You were about to have dinner with his mom and his brothers in Charles' flat and you hated how stressed you felt about truly meeting his family even though you'd already been introduced.

“Are you sure there’s nothing you have to warn me about, huh ?” you asked Charles for the hundredth time as you put on a blue shirt that made you look older than you were. Dinner was ready, Charles was too : the only one that was still changing her outfit (for the fourth time already) was you.

“Y/N, I told you : you have nothing to worry about. And you met them already, it’s not like they’re complete strangers.” Charles said from the kitchen where he was setting up the table.

You sighed. You couldn’t help it. The last time you'd seen Charles' family, you were just the girl who starred in his debut movie with him, not the girl he fucked every night. “Maybe blue isn’t my colour, don't I look kind of pale ?" you asked as you joined the kitchen.

“Shh, you’re making me crazy. You look perfect, just like you always do.” Charles handed you a glass of wine. He was wearing a red jacket on some beige pants and looked good. Like really good. “Drink this, it’ll help you.”

The wine was good, really good, and Charles' hands massaging your shoulders felt even better. You hated how Charles always seemed to know what you needed.

“Jesus, baby, this feels good.” The word flew out of your lips so naturally you didn’t even notice at first.

“What did you call me ?”

Your cheeks were turning red under Charles' sharp green eyes. You had seen this look before and knew exactly what usually came right after. “I- um, baby ?”

Charles took a deep breath. His body had gotten closer to yours. “And she does it again, Jesus, Y/N.”

You didn’t exactly understand why such a simple word had such an effect on Charles but you liked it. You liked having this power over him when you usually were the one looking like a middle-school girl talking to her crush for the first time. You felt a knot forming in your stomach, getting eager for a contact with Charles' skin. “Well, baby is gonna have to calm down. At least for now.” you answered, smiling wickedly.

Charles lost his smile. “Y/N. Stop it or I swear I’ll-” The doorbell had rung. Pascale, Arthur and Lorenzo were there.

We're not talking lately

You hate the fact that every line in this song seems directly aimed at youYou. He clearly remember Charles telling you this one word for word. It happened a couple of weeks after your breakup, after you'd moved out of Charles' London flat and had taken all of your things, even the ones you'd always left behind during your previous crises. You never really believed that this time was going to be the real one, that all of the years you'd spent around Charles were on the verge of becoming memories and nothing more. You couldn't even remember the reason you had started fighting. All you knew was that words couldn’t be unsaid and that you couldn’t look at Charles without remembering all the things that had been yelled that infamous night. So you had packed your bags in the middle of the night and had left.

Charles hadn’t called. For about a week, all you could do was look at your phone every ten minutes, hoping for a message, a missed call notification (though it would’ve been merely impossible for you to miss that call), something that would prove you that Charles cared about your relationship. You had walked away so that Charles would realise that he couldn't keep on treating you like you were granted and you had ended up losing it all.

Weeks had gone by without a word from the man you now called your ex. And then weeks had turned into months. Tabloids had sparked dating rumours of Charles and some amazingly pretty girls and it looked like the 'Y/N' chapter had quickly been forgotten. You had felt like an idiot until you'd received the long awaited message.

‘hey y/n, i hope you’re doing good. we’re not talking lately but i just needed you to know that i miss you’

Your heart had stopped beating. Or had it started beating faster ? You had felt like your insides were burning and your mind stopped functioning. It’d been so long since Charles had gone out of the picture that you weren’t even waiting for a sign anymore. You'd started moving on, helped by some of your friends who, tired of hearing complaints about the way things should’ve been, had decided that you had to create a Tinder profile. You'd been on dates, you'd met men that were willing to fill you heart with pure joy and some who were just willing to fill you. But you'd taken what you wanted from both categories and you'd stopped aching with the simple sight of Charles' name on a billboard.

But this message, it wasn’t supposed to ever be sent, it was too late now. It disrupted every plan you'd made to deal with the loss of the one you'd thought would be the love of his life. So you did what you believed was the best to do for your heart. You never answered.

I confess I can tell that you are at your best I'm selfish so I'm hating it You hated it but you still knew every single part of Charles by heart. You'd learned over the years how to decipher every single one of his expressions, even the ones Charles thought nobody would notice. You knew what a half-smile meant, what the subtle frown hid and what the quick eyes puckering could be translated as. And this particular knowledge of Charles' feelings also meant that you totally knew that he was lying when he was claiming to be really happy for you. Charles hated it, he wanted to disappear, to go back in time and never let you leave because he’d never been as happy as you'd made him ever since. You knew that, you could read in the discrete clenching of his jaw.

You weren’t supposed to meet, not more than two years after your last interaction. Charles' message had been left unanswered and he’d never sent another. But awards season was always the theatre of a lot of unwanted encounters.

Charles was as beautiful as ever in his white turtleneck and black pants. His eyes sparkled when they met yours and there was nothing you could’ve done to avoid the conversation.

“You look quite good, Y/N.” You shivered, you hated the way your entire body still reacted to the simple sound of Charles' voice. “How’ve you been ?”

“I- erm…” You hated yourself for having to clear your throat, “I’ve been alright, thanks for asking. I didn’t know you’d be here tonight. I thought you were on tour.”

Charles smiled when you admitted knowing his schedule. “Yeah, I wasn’t supposed to come but then they sent the guest list and I don’t know, I guess I figured I’d stop by.” He wasn’t even trying to hide the fact that he was openly flirting with you.

You hated the way you'd missed out on most of the ceremonies because you did not feel ready to face Charles. You'd been right. The sight of Charles' ringed fingers, his grown hair, the sparkle in his eyes, the smelling of his very own scent that hadn’t changed a bit ; it all made you weak. You just knew by the look on Charles' face that you were sharing the same thought : how could you have let go of what you had ?

"Well I’m glad you’re here.” You weren’t, but you hoped you weren’t as easy to decipher as Charles was so that you could keep the act on long enough to be convincing. “I’m pretty sure you’re going to win every single one of these things. You always do.” This last part was genuine : Charles was one of the most talented people you knew and even though you had no idea what his new album sounded like, you were pretty confident it was good.

“Oh thanks, Y/N. I’d be surprised if your movie didn’t win anything tonight. How ‘bout we go out after that, huh ? I mean, if I get to win something and to see you, this night might become the best I’ve had in a while.” His green eyes were reflecting a malicious light that almost made him look mischievous. You felt a knot forming in your stomach. You knew it was physically impossible to refuse Charles' offer but also knew how bad of a choice it would be. You were stuck weighing pros and cons in your mind, well aware that your silence was getting a bit too long. You hated the way Charles' presence made it almost impossible for you to think straight.

Your phone rang in you pocket, a sort of a way out you clung to. “Hi, baby, where are you ?” On the other end of the line, Daniel, your new boyfriend – was it really a boyfriend if the only thing you shared was an appreciation for each other’s body and a fear of being entirely alone ? – answered but you didn’t listen to anything he was saying. Instead, you focused on Charles' visible frown and the tears that he was fighting back. He mouthed something that looked like “I’ll see you”, though you both knew it wasn’t true and left without ever looking back. It took you a couple of seconds to process what had just happened before you were able to concentrate on what you were being told.

What Charles never let you know – perhaps because he hated how uncontrollable his feelings for you were – was how big of a mess your encounter had turned him into. He then fully understood that he’d lost you, that it was over, your love had supposedly died when he still believed he would be able to bring it back to life. He hated himself for being selfish, for hating it when you looked so well, for being the one unable to get over it. His wound was still bleeding when yours seemed to have already healed, at least from what he’d seen. And it was at that moment, as he was curled up on his bed, wondering if he was a bad person for hating the way you could be happy without him, that Charles started writing Cherry.

[...]

You hate the way your eyes will look reddish and puffy for the rest of the flight as much as you hate the tears that are running down your cheeks. You secretly hope your neighbour won’t notice your unease and replay Cherry. You already know you've missed out on some lyrics and you don’t want to. You want to hear every single one of Charles' words, the ones that seemed to have been written only for you to hear.

And suddenly, you hate the fact that other people have been able to hear this song (even more so that they did it before you). It feels like such an invasion of Charles' intimacy, of what he has shared with you. Everything sounds so obvious – from the lyrics to the title, reminding you of how you'd learnt a French endearment and always used it to call Charles : chéri, chéri, chéri – it’s an open window on your relationship and the way its ending was handled, the effect you had on Charles.

But then, now that you think about it, you also come to the realisation that, except for those of your friends that know and the few people in Charles' life that are aware of the two-year-long relationship you had, no one knows that you and Charles even kept in touch once the promotion of your movie ended. It’s not an absurd logic : you don’t think Charles has ever seen any of the other actors in years. And this, the fact that for the majority of people, what you had never existed, brings more tears to your eyes. Nothing in the song gives off any hint on who it is written to for people who’re not close to Charles. You somewhat feel deceived. As much as you hate the feeling of losing some privacy, you hate the fact that you can’t really brag about this song being about you. It is a beautiful song, you have the right to feel quite proud of inspiring it.

It must be the fourth time Cherry replays when you catch on some line and realize that, intentionally or not, Charles has left a hint as to who’s the song about. It is not really obvious but you know how fans are eager to decipher any small details.

I noticed that there's a piece of you in how I dress

You had hated this interview. Six months had eventually gone by after Charles' last attempt of talking to you when Alex and Lily had shown you the extract. You were in their apartment, sharing a bottle of wine and a pack of cigarettes, having just learnt that Alex had gotten the role in the movie he’d auditioned for.

“I never thought he was hurting as much as you did before I saw this” he had said, lighting another cylinder. His living room was already full of smoke. “but I swear, I might not be the closest to Charles, but I’d never seen him look so sad, Y/N” he had added as he was searching the video.

It was one of Yuki Tsunoda’s restaurant interviews. Charles looked as good as ever and you had hated the way you'd had to repress a smile from appearing on your face. Something looked different but you couldn’t point out what it was. In the restaurant, Yuki asked Charles about his fashion style evolution. You couldn’t figure out why Alex wanted you to watch this.

“I don’t really think I tell myself : oh yeah, this is the kind of style that I’m going to go for. I truly believe that my outfits are a way of expressing the way I feel and also that the people who surround me have a great influence on the way I dress. I mean, you asking that is funny because right this morning I looked at myself in the mirror and I started thinking of the way, you know,” and suddenly, in a matter of moments, Charles' eyes had started shining from tears that threatened rolling down his cheeks. His voice sounded hoarse and full of sobs, “there’s quite literally a piece of the person I love in how I dress. I still have some clothes that I used to steal from our closet and that I forgot to give back. Like this,” Charles pointed at his sweater, “this one’s Y/N's but I love it”.

The name had slipped out of his mouth but neither he, nor Yuki, seemed to have noticed, too focused on his emotions (Charles had to actually wipe a tear) to care. But you had noticed and so had others. So had Alex and Lily.

But this wasn’t what had retained most of your attention. There was no point in lying but you had hated the way you'd loved hearing Charles refer to you as the person he loved.

I just miss your accent and your friends

It happened once. Between their infamous encounter which had led to Charles starting to write Cherry and the day he finished the song, you and Charles had only talked once. 

You had broken up more than two years ago and yet, you couldn’t say that you were over Charles. It would’ve been safer to just say that you'd just learned to live without him. But you'd gotten pretty good at it. It struck you sometimes at night and you would find yourself crying in your pillow. But then, you were able to go on for days and weeks without thinking about Charles. Things still reminded you of what you had shared but it did not make you automatically cry anymore. It was pretty much like learning how to live with a missing limb. You can live without it, sometimes you can even forget that it’s not there, but somehow it always feels like something should be here and isn’t. 

That’s what you tried to explain to Alex as you were heading for the bar in which Carlos and Pierre were waiting for you. All of you had met while filming the movie Carlos directed. Alex, Pierre and you starred in it as well as Charles who also created the soundtrack. You all got awards for it. 

“You guys are so late it should be illegal.” Pierre said as he tried to look annoyed. His face almost immediately broke into a smile. “I’m glad to see you.”

You laughed as you sat down next to him, a pint of beer already waiting on the table. “We all know it’s because of Alex.”

"Shut it, Y/L/N."

“Well, at least, you’re not as late as Charles. He’s the worst.”

Your eyes went wide hearing Charles. Except for Alex, none of the boys knew how hard it was for you to get through this breakup. They all believed you when you swore to be over him. You couldn’t blame them for inviting him, you just had to play pretend. “Oh, erm… I didn’t know he was coming tonight, I-I thought he was still in Monaco.”

It was Pierre who had told you that Charles was now splitting his time between the two cities and you had felt a sort of relief mixed with this silly feeling of regretting the way things had become. 

“Oh no, he’s not. Speaking of the devil !”

You didn’t even have to raise your eyes to feel Charles' gaze planted on you. Yet you did and for a minute, as your eyes crossed, it felt like there was no one else but the two of you in the entire pub. He was still as beautiful as ever, just like you remembered him to be, but something had changed. Charles was no longer the young man you'd known, he’d grown into a real man and was now entering his golden age. It saddened you to realise that you were both evolving without the other one to witness the changes but it quickly faded away as you felt your stomach twisting with desire. 

“God, I missed you guys !” Charles almost cried after breaking eye contact with you, something that seemed to have cost him an effort.

You internally thanked your friends for being so chatty. The night had been going on for a while now without requiring too much effort from you. You mostly drank, comfortably seated in the settee and squeezed between Pierre and Carlos. You also tried to discreetly check Charles out, though you weren’t really sure your glances had gone unnoticed. You couldn’t resist it. It felt so weird to see him, just a couple of metres away from you. 

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t know you’d be here.” God, you hated unisex bathrooms. His green eyes met yours through the mirror. His cheeks were a bit reddish and you couldn’t say if it was because you were here or it simply resulted from the heat of the pub.

“You mean, here as in the toilettes, sorry, in the bathroom or here in the pub ?” You knew he was tipsy from the casualness of his voice. Charles squinted as your gaze took an inquisitive look. “Are you mad at me ? For coming ?”

“I”m not.” A sigh escaped your mouth. The water was still running from the tap. “What are you doing here, Charles ?” 

“I don’t know.” You were now side by side.

“I had forgotten about this you know, the way you squeeze French words in the middle of sentences. It's funny, I guess I just miss your accent and that, being there with our friends.” You could imagine the heat of Charles' skin and the way his lips would feel if he kissed you just right here. You shook you head ; Charles wasn't the only one affected by alcohol but you weren’t just tipsy, you were completely drunk. 

“Oh, really.” He was trying not to sound unsettled, you knew it. “Is that your way of saying that you just miss me ?”

You chuckled and his green eyes sparkled. “You get to choose, Charlie. Is that your way of telling me you’re missing me too ?”

You hated the way you had missed the taste of Charles' lips and how his hands clung to you body when you kissed. The water was still running from the tap. 

[...]

“Did you like it ?” Charles is literally glowing under the Monégasque sun. His skin is a little tanned and you love how weak in the knees it makes you feel. You're in his garden, drinking beers and smoking. The sky is so blue it seems endless. You love the way it feels like summer. 

“What are you talking about ?” Charles' hand strokes you bare arm gently as you're laying on the grass. You're so relaxed you're not even thinking about the hours you spent crying on the plane. Your eyes are still reddish and puffy, though. 

“Cherry. Did you like it ? I mean, you obviously cried but I hope it is because you regret boycotting me during all these years.” 

“I hated it.” You answer, eyes closed. You can feel Charles' body shifting. He’s now looking at you from upon you guess since you feel his breath crashing on your face. “As much as I hate you.” You add, smiling. 

This time, it’s Charles who kisses you. You love how there’s nothing to hate.

[daisyblog]

Just Hold On

Our Story Masterlist Summary: Harry takes care of YN.

Warning: grief, loss of a loved one, upset, crying

Four days. Four days of feeling helpless. Watching her cry, not knowing how to stop her pain. Harry was expecting her to shut herself away but he had read that grief hits people differently, which explains her constant movement as she cleaned and rearranged everything she could. It was almost like she was afraid to stop and be alone with her thoughts.

Cutting his thoughts, Harry’s phone rang from where it sat on the kitchen island 'Mum' it read.

"Hey Mum". Harry greeted as he pottered around the kitchen, moving some used cutlery to the sink to wash later.

"Hi darling..how's YN today?" Anne’s delicate voice spoke through the speaker.

"She's okay..I just feel so helpless..like I hate seeing her hurting" Harry’s voice was deflated, he needed his Mum’s wise words.

"Oh darling...I know it's heartbreaking..I just can't stop thinking about them all..and the little ones" Anne sympathised on the other end of the phone.

"Yeh..they don't quite understand..YN spoke with her grandparents earlier". Harry explained about Ernest and Doris.

"Poor babies..are you going to watch Louis tonight?".

"Yeh..yeh YN's just gone to get ready..I think he's so brave for doing it..but I know it's what their Mum would have wanted" He gently spoke to his Mum as he continued to pace around the room.

"She would have..she loved watching him perform..they're stong..YN and Louis I mean". Anne thought out loud.

"That's what I'm afraid of Mum..I'm like..I'm worried she's going to hold it all together and..and..I don't know crumble I suppose". Harry’s voice rambled his thoughts.

"Harry..that's where she's gonna need you...let her be strong for everyone else..she's probably going to hold it all together for her sisters and brother...but you be the one that holds her yeh”.

"Yeh..I didn't think of it like that".

"Look after her love...she's going to need you now more than ever". Anne’s words were wise.

"I'll always look after her Mum".

"I know you will...I love you darling...give YN a big cuddle from me".

"I will..I love you too Mum".

"Bye love".

After the conversation with his Mum, Harry could hear some music playing upstairs. Following the sound, he was led to YN standing in their bedroom looking at a black plain dress that was laid across the duvet, and he recognised ABBA playing from the speaker.

"Hey baby" Harry’s voice startled her.

"Shit...you scared me" YN laughed. Harry had missed her laugh. It was one of his favourite sounds.

"Sorry..I didn't mean to...Abba huh?”.

"I remember when I was younger...me Mum would be doing her make-up or whatever..in her bedroom and..um...we would all be in there with her and she'd always play ABBA...and we would all dance and I dunno..sorry it's silly". As YN spoke, Harrg moved closer to her so he could listen.

"Hey..it's not silly..if listening to music helps...then do it" Harry gently spoke as he wrapped his arms around her in comfort. As she leaned her head on Harry’s chest, he had an idea. "Alexa..play Dancing Queen".

"What are you doin'?" YN looked up at him with a confused expression.

"We're going to dance!” Harry stated like it was the most obvious thing.

"Bu-" YN began before Harry interrupted her.

"No buts!” Harry’s voice was deep.

Ooh You can dance You can jive Having the time of your life Ooh, see that girl Watch that scene Digging the dancing queen

And that's how they got ready that afternoon, dancing around in their bedroom, singing into hairbrushes and forgetting the world around them for a moment.

---

Harry and YN were on their way to Fountain Studios, where Louis was performing his new song on The X Factor. As Harry drove, YN sat silently in the passenger seat as reality hit her again. Almost like it was a coincidence, a familiar song played through the speakers, causing their heads to snap towards each other.

"Fook off!" YN's voice broke the silence "They..I haven't..they don't play this on the radio anymore.” She couldn’t help but stutter.

"Almost like it was meant to be ey?”. Harry wore a big smile at how perfectly timed the song played.

"I remember when you sang this to me drunk once..cringey as fook it was". YN laughed at the memory,

"Don't fucking lie...you loved it". Harry was enjoying the happy moment between them.

"I did actually" YN finally admitted.

"Because you're gorgeous, I'd do anything for you, because you're gorgeous, I know you'll get me through" Harry sung along with the radio and reached over to hold her hand that sat on her knee.

As the song finished Harry was quick to speak again "You know I would do anything for you don't you?".

Her hand in Harry’s squeezed his slightly before she spoke the three words Harry loved hearing "I love you".

"I love you too gorgeous!”.

---

As they entered the busy room backstage where Louis and people from his team currently were, YN leaves Harry’s arms and immediately finds her brother in the crowd. Instantly they wrap their arms around each other and Harry can see Louis talk into her ear. Harry stands back in the corner and allows them to have their moment. From where he stands he can see YN nod slightly at whatever Louis says to her.

Two bodies break Harry from his thoughts as they stand next to him. “Hey man..how you doin'?”. Liam's the first one to talk.

"Just trying to be there for her if I'm 'onest..she just..she's trying to keep herself busy all the time" Harry explained to the two boys as he continued to look in YN’s direction.

"Must be so hard" Niall spoke as he took a glance at Louis and YN.

"We're gonna go and stay with my Mum for a few days before heading to Doncaster for Christmas...just escape reality for a bit...YN suggested it". Harry spoke about their plans for the next few weeks.

"Might be good..you know to be around other people..take her mind off things" Liam nodded his head.

"Yeah I hope so" Harry thought out loud, hoping they were right.

Louis was talking to a member of his team so YN made her way back over and Niall was the first to pull her into a brotherly embrace.

"Tomlinson...I've missed your hugs" Niall spoke as he wrapped his arms around her shoulders. Watching the sight in front of him made Harry realise how much love YN had around her.

"Yeah..well save some for the rest of us mate" Liam joked. YN moved from Niall's hold and greeted Liam in a hug. Harry could hear Liam's voice as he wrapped his arm around her. “We're all here for you too okay..don't be afraid to call or text okay?" to which YN thanked him. This wasn't just friendship, this was family.

"Is Lou okay?" Harry asked YN as she moved closer to him, before reaching to hold his hand.

"Think he's just holding it together if I'm 'onest" YN spoke as her fingers played with Harry, whilst looking over at her brother.

"Where's your Nan and Grandad...and the girls?" Harry asked as he looked around the room, not being able to see them. Niall and Liam were talking amongst themselves.

"Phebs and Dais wanted to see the audience empty or somethin'...I'm gonna stay backstage to watch Lou..if you don't mind?".

"Wh-why would I mind...we'll do whatever you're comfortable with" Harry reassured her and pecked her lips in a quick motion.

"Some things never change huh...still disgustingly in love..feel like I'm back in 2013" Niall teased them, which Harry was glad of because he thought that's what YN needed, for people to still act the same.

"Aw shut up Horan" YN laughed, as she pushed his arm playfully.

"I'll wait until you find the one" Harry joked as he pulled YN even closer to his side.

"I feel sorry for her already" YN continued to tease Niall as he stood there with a smile on his face.

"You're a cheeky shit Tommo..you know that" Niall joked.

Louis found them standing in the corner and pulled Niall then Liam into a hug and thanked them both for coming, explaining how much it meant to him. "C'mon Harold...I won't leave you out" Louis joked and Harry wrapped his arm around him as he whispers in his ear "Has she been okay?".

"Yeh and no" Harry truthfully answered, as they broke apart.

"I'm looking forward to hearing your song" Liam broke the silence.

"I'm so fookin' nervous man...I couldn't even finish sound check earlier..just dunno..felt like I was gonna throw up". Louis shrugged his shoulders, a nervous habit of his as he spoke.

Niall tapped Louis on the shoulder and reassured him "Hey..you're gonna do great Tommo...we're all right behind ya tonight yeh?".

"Yeh I know..thanks man" Louis wore a grateful smile. "I think Nan, Grandad and the girls are gonna sit in the audience..are you joining them Kiddo?". He aimed the question towards YN.

"I'm gonna stay backstage with Harry..and the boys" YN answered as she moved so she was standing in front of Harry and naturally his arm wrapped around her front and landed on her shoulder.

"Of course you are" Louis had a playful smirk on his face "Fookin' hell Styles...what's your secret, she never wants to leave your side?" Before he could respond, Louis continued before he walked away chuckling to himself "Actually don't fookin' answer that".

---

It had been a couple of days since Louis' X Factor performance and as YN requested they were in Holmes Chapel for a few days, before travelling to Doncaster for Louis's Birthday and Christmas. Harry and YN had arrived a couple of hours ago and as soon as they walked through Anne’s front door, YN was pulled into her arms. At any other time, Harry would have made a joke about her liking YN more than him, her son, but instead he carried on walking through the hallway and placing their bags at the bottom of the stairs.

After dinner later that night, they were sitting in the lounge, Gemma and Michael sat on one sofa with Robin and YN, Mum and Harry on the other. YN's back was pressed to Harry’s side and his arm wrapped around her frame and hand resting on her tummy. Harry had noticed she was quieter than usual as the rest of them chatted about different things, but Harry thought maybe she was concentrating on the film playing on the telly. Harry pressed his lips to the top of her head, and to his left, Harry felt his Mum give him a subtle nudge. As he turned to look at her she gave him a sympathetic look and mouthed "Is she okay?" as she nodded towards YN in Harry’d arms, to which he shrugged his shoulders.

"I'm gonna go to the loo a sec" YN spoke for the first time in a while, as she stood up leaving the space next to Harry empty and walking towards the kitchen.

Anne asked if anyone wanted a cup of tea, to which everyone replied: "Yes please". Anne had been gone all for a few minutes until she appeared at the lounge door calling Harry’s name softly and motioning for him to follow her. As they walked through the kitchen door, she spoke in a whisper "I..I'm..I didn't want to knock on the door just in case...but I think YN is crying in there".

Harry didn't hesitate to walk over to the bathroom door and give it a soft knock "YN..it's me", he heard a sniffle, instantly knowing Anne was right.

"I-I..I'll be out now" YN's voice was heard through the door. Harry opened the door gently and peered around to see her frame sitting next to the bath on the floor, with her back pressed against the wall and knees up to her chest.

"Baby!”. Harry panicked and walked into the room and closed the door behind him. Harry sits next to YN on the ground and pulled her to his side where she grips onto his jumper and sobs into Harry’s chest as he holds the side of her. Harry allows her to cry and get everything she feels out. After some time she sits up and wipes her eyes with the sleeves of her jumper.

"Sorry" her voice is quiet, almost like she’s embarrassed.

"Babe..why are you saying sorry?". Harry voice was gentle, soft and calm as he wiped away another tear from her cheek.

"I-I...for..for crying" she sniffled trying to stop her tears from spilling.

"Don't you dare be sorry for that...you know it's okay to feel like this". Harry was sad that YN felt like she needed to apologise.

"It's just..I..it hits me more in the night" she confessed.

"I think that's normal..you kind of have more time to think".

"Yeh..I just miss her so much..this is probably really silly-".

"Whatever it is I bet it's not".

"I've been phoning her phone still and sending her texts" YN wiped a stray tear that escaped.

"Does it help?".

"Kind of".

"Then it's not silly and you should keep doing it".

"Why did you come in here anyway?" she questioned.

"My Mum was making everyone a cuppa and she heard you crying..she didn't want to come in just incase-".

YN's voice interrupted "She's got a heart of gold hasn't she?”.

"She does!”. Harry couldn’t help but smile.

---

It was now Christmas Eve, also Louis' birthday. Harry and YN travelled to Doncaster that morning from Anne’s house. Since that night Harry found YN in the bathroom upset, she seemed a bit more relaxed and not hiding away when she feels upset. As they walked through the door to YN's grandparent's house, they were both greeted by Jen and Len pulling them both in for a hug. As Jen began making them all cups of tea, they all stood in the kitchen chatting.

"Is Lou here yet" YN asked her grandparents, waiting for one of them to answer.

"No not yet..he said he'd be here around 4ish". Jen glanced at the brown clock that was up on the wall.

"Oh I was hoping he'd be here earlier than that-" YN began but was interrupted by a heard of footsteps and her four sisters appeared all running into her and hugging any part of her body they could.

"Missed me have ya?" YN’s voice turned into her happy and bubbly self. Harry wondered if it was for her sisters sake.

"Can you paint my nails?" "Can I do your make-up?" "Will you curl my hair" the girls all spoke over each other, making Harry chuckle.

"C'mon then munchkins, let's go" YN spoke, holding Pheobe and Daisy's hand as they walked through to the lounge and continued upstairs.

Once the girls' voices had disappeared upstairs, Jen looked in their direction to make sure they were upstairs, before handing Harry and Len their mugs of tea as they all sat by the table. "How's she been Harry?".

"She..um..she's been okay..but she did break down in my Mum's the other night, I found her crying on the bathroom floor" Harry explained, as he watched the older couple take a glance at eachother .

"I knew she wasn't being truthful with me" Jen spoke with a sad expression.

"I think she wants to be strong for you all" Harry admitted, taking a sip of his boiling hot tea.

"She's always been stubborn..ever since she was little hasn't she Jen?”. Len sighed.

"Yeh..her and Louis both..oh Harry they would argue like mad...typical siblings really...and then the next minute they were like best mates...YN always looks for Louis for when she's upset..always has done" Jen reminised.

"Yeh she told me that when she's with him she feels like she's at home..a comfort thing I suppose" Harry admitted, thinking about what YN had told him before.

---

Just after 4, Louis arrived and just like the girls had greeted YN when she arrived, the five of them all ran to him shouting 'Happy Birthday'.

"Harold...I'm very disappointed that you didn't run to me too" Louis joked as he walked towards Harry.

"Happy Birthday mate" Harry said witha big grin and tapped his shoulder.

"Thanks lad!”.

"Right..c'mon then you lot..let's get some music on and let's celebrate me turning 25" Louis ordered his sisters. The younger girls ran into the lounge and decided which songs to play first. Harry stood back and watched as Louis and YN walked together, Louis's arm wrapped around her shoulder.

As Jen and Len stayed in the kitchen, preparing dinner and insisted they didn't need any of Harry’s help, he stood in the doorway of the lounge as the Tomlinsons danced around the room singing along to 'Shut Up and Dance".

"Harry c'mon...you can't just stand there" Daisy began to pull Harry into the chaos.

"B-but I can't dance" Harry protested, but it was no use.

"Neither can Louis..it's fine" Phoebe teased her older brother as he acted hurt and put a hand over his heart. The song changes and 'This One's For You' plays through the speaker.

As Harry spins Daisy around and she continues to dance. Harry looks over at YN as she dances with the older girls and as she catches his gaze, he sends her a wink that makes her shyly smile back at him.

We're in this together Hear our hearts beat together We stand strong together We're in this forever

Tag List: (let me know if you would like to be added) @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @harrys-flower @platinumbarbie143 @frickin-bats @harrysbbyh0ney fanfictioncafe lilfreakjez jerseygirlinca iamahallucinationnn @chronicallybubbly @goldensunflowe-r  @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @kaverichauhan @peterholland04 @panicattheuc @indierockgirrl

[04mxfutbol]

Falling in or out of love? (Ashley Sanchez x Reader)

A/N: This is the fic I had in mind for a while now! I was listening to Labyrinth and the song inspired me lol. (So kind of based on my current favorite song Labyrinth.)

You walked into the hotel, holding your suitcase tightly. Walking towards the receptionist.

“I should have a reservation for Y/N Y/L/N.” You say to the receptionist. Handing her your ID.

“Y/L/N. Ah yes, room 313, your roommate has also gotten here. Rebecca Sauerbrunn.”

Score. You got a chill roommate.

“Great thank you.” You say with a smile, grabbing the key card and walking towards the elevator.

You arrive to your room, opening the door, you hear nothing but silence. You walk inside the room and you’re met with Becky laying on the bed, a book in her hands. Glasses on as she reads. A cup of coffee on the table beside her.

“Y/N so nice to see you once again. Sure feels great to be playing alongside you rather than against you.” Becky says making you laugh.

“I feel the same way about you cap.” You say nodding your head. “So roomies huh?”

“I’m just glad I got you as my roommate, I think I’d quit the team if I were to get Emily one more time.”

“You could never leave us, you love us too much to leave us alone and unprotected.”

“Correct.” Becky says nodding her head. “I know you’re a big fan of being close to the window so I took this bed here. Unpack and get ready for two weeks of pure calmness with me.”

“Oh I’m definitely looking forward to it.” You say with a smile, setting your suitcase up on your bed.

After unpacking your stuff you decided to take a short nap because who doesn’t love naps. You’re woken up by Becky who tells you it’s time for dinner. You both start to head downstairs to meet the rest of the team.

“A secret of mine is I kind of hate elevators.” You whisper to Becky.

“Why?”

“It’s a metaphor.” You say waving her off.

You grab a plate, serving yourself some food. You look around and see Christen sitting next to Alex and Rose.

“Can I join?”

“Of course, take a seat.” Christen says scooting over to make room. “How are you?”

“Fine thanks.” You say.

“Are you sure?” Alex asks you, putting her hand on your shoulder.

“Why do you ask?”

“We just want to know how you’re doing, can we not ask that?” Alex asks.

“I mean yeah I suppose.” You say furrowing your eyebrows. You look down to your food poking it around and then taking a bite. “I want my own home cooked food. This is a little too healthy for my liking.”

“We heard about the breakup.” Alex says and you look up.

“So is their a weekly newsletter about stuff like this going around or?” You say curiously. How they knew who knew. You sure didn’t know how.

“Hey guys.” Kelley says.

There’s how.

“We broke up like almost a year ago, mutually.” You say calmly.

You and Ashley broke up mutually about almost a year ago, agreeing that you both needed some space. From what? Who even knows. But something wasn’t right between the two of you which made you both realize you both needed to step back.

“But you’re doing fine?” Christen asks softly.

“Yes. I’m doing fine, sad most of the time, crying on the floor sobbing, screaming, crying. But fine.” You say with a chuckle.

“Y/N.” Christen says softly.

“I’m kidding, sorry I am kidding. I just like messing with you guys. I’m fine. I’m okay.”

A liar.

Oh how miserable you were for the first couple of weeks, the realization hitting you so deep, especially when you were alone in your apartment.

“I’m trying to get over her. Although I think I’ll be getting over her my whole life.” You whisper. “But I remember we both agreed we needed to break up so there’s that.”

“Oh Y/N.” Christen says pulling you in for a hug.

“I’m better though, every day that passes by I think I am closer and closer to getting over her.” You say with a shrug. “But I don’t know how you guys expect me to bounce back from the break up so fast.”

“We’re not Y/N. We just want to make sure you’re okay and dealing with the break up in a healthy way.”

While Christen comforted you, Ashley was just outside the room with Trinity.

“You look like an absolute mess.” Trinity tells Ashley as they walk out the elevator.

“Gee, thanks for that.” Ashley says.

“You still haven’t been getting enough sleep have you?” Trinity asks.

“No and it’s dragging me down like you have no idea. I get so tired quickly, I barely even have energy to put on nice clothes to look decent.”

“And this whole losing sleep isn’t because of the breakup?”

“Nope it’s definitely not that. We broke up like almost a year ago. Trust me it’s not that.” Ashley says opening the door.

As soon as she opens the door to the breakfast area, she spots you laughing with Rose.

“So definitely not because of Y/N. Right.” Trinity says passing Ashley and going for a plate.

“It’s not! I’m like not even bothered by it.” Ashley says following Trinity.

“Sure. You definitely have me fooled.”

“It was mutual.”

“Doesn’t mean you’re over her.”

“I am.” Ashley says making Trinity stop in her tracks, turning around to face Ashley. “Kind of?”

“Thought so.”

“I’m getting there though.” Ashley says. “Soon.”

- - - -

The following day you had practice until sunset. Your legs completely giving out at the end of it. Grabbing your bottle of water and chugging it as if your life really does depend on it, which it does.

“Hey, tomorrow we’re grabbing some food downtown. Do you want to come with us?” Abby asks you.

“Who’s we?” You ask looking at Abby.

“Sam, Rose, Lynn, Alex, Naomi and I.” She says and you think about it for two seconds. “Oh and Taylor.”

“Yeah I’ll come with.”

“Good it’ll be nice for you to get out.” Abby says patting her shoulder.

The following day you dressed yourself in some of your comfy clothes to go out with the rest of the girls. A smile on your face as a nice little lunch with your teammates would be fun.

“Are you going out?” Becky asks as she lays in her bed.

“Yeah with some girls to grab some food.” You say as you put on your hoodie, more specifically a hoodie Alyssa had given you.

“That’s good to hear, have fun Y/N.”

You walked out of your shared room, bumping into Alex.

“You ready?” Alex asks and you nod your head.

Across the hall, in the room next to Rose and Megan was Ashley with Trinity.

“Come on Ash get up, let’s go shopping.” Trinity says shaking Ashley.

“Does it look like I’m in the mood to go shopping?” Ashley says, Trinity backs away, arms up in defeat.

“Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed.” Trinity says.

“I’m tired.”

“You’ve been tired for almost the exact amount of time you and Y/N split up and you’re still denying that she isn’t the reason why you’re like this.”

“I’m getting over her trust me.”

“No I don’t think you are, you’re only telling yourself that to convince yourself but you are not. You’re not over her.”

“Slowly I am.” Ashley says.

Ashley pulls out her phone going straight to Instagram. Watching Naomi’s story. A picture of you looking at the camera, holding your cup of tea, a smile on your face.

“I’m not over her. I don’t think I ever will be. I thought I was. It feels like there’s a labyrinth in my fucking mind and I can’t seem to get out.” Ashley whispers. “I definitely thought I was slowly getting over her but-.”

“You’re falling in love with her again?” Trinity asks and Ashley looks up from her phone.

“Oh yeah.” Ashley says with a sigh. “I’m falling in love with her again.”

Ashley pulls the blanket over her head as she lets out a groan.

“I’m falling in love again.”

You returned to the hotel after an eventful and fun day with the girls. Going out for some lunch and finding an arcade where you totally beat Alex at mini golf.

You go to push the door when someone opens the door making you fall forward.

“Oh crap.” You shout as you almost fall.

Your eyes meet green eyes. Green eyes you knew so well.

Oh no. It’s happening.

“Sorry I didn’t expect someone on the other side of the door.” Ashley says and you stay quiet.

Oh no. You know this feeling all too well.

“You okay?”

“Y/N you okay?” Sam asks and you nod your head.

“Christen is up in her room right?” You ask Sam.

“Yeah why?”

“Great thanks.”

You run up to the room, obnoxiously knocking on Christen’s door.

“Christen open the door please!” You shout.

“Y/N lovely seeing you here.”

“I need to talk to you about something.”

“Sure thing what’s going on?”

“Have you ever been in love with someone and they didn’t love you back?” You ask Christen.

“Of course.” Christen says and your eyes widen.

“You have? Who wouldn’t be in love with you, with all due respect.” You say quickly.

“You.”

“Sorry excuse me?” You ask as you stumble backwards.

“I’m messing with you, sorry continue.” Christen says and you sigh in relief.

“Respectfully I love you but anyway, I think I may have fallen in love again.”

“Okay? What’s so bad about that Y/N?”

“With Ashley.”

“Oh well how does that make you feel?” Christen asks as she sits up from her bed. You walk over and sit on the edge of her bed.

“Like I’m falling in love again?” You say.

“Right but what’s going through your mind as you say it out loud.”

“I thought this plane was going down.” You say. “I don’t know how it turned around and I’m once again falling in love with her again.”

“Pardon? Plane?” Christen asks confusedly.

“Metaphors.” You say. “What do I do? You’re like an expert.”

“I wouldn’t say expert but I will say that you should take a deep breath. Breathe in, breathe through, breathe deep, breathe out. Now relax and tell me what your heart says.”

“I want to tell her I love her and I can’t see my life without her.” You say looking at Christen.

“That’s a choice yes.” Christen says nodding her head.

“It’s a bad choice isn’t it?”

“No, no. Don’t rush it. Talk to her and see where that leads you. If you ask me, I think she still loves you.” Christen says softly.

“Thanks for listening.”

“Anytime.”

You get up from her bed, giving her a hug then head back to your room.

Talk to her, easy.

You walk into your room going into the bathroom to wash your face. The light in the room was on.

“Hey Becky I have a question.” You say but get no response. “Becky?”

You pat your face dry with a towel and walk fully into the shared room. Becky isn’t there, instead it’s someone else.

“Hi.” Ashley says getting up from Becky’s bed.

“Oh hey.” You say looking at Ashley. “Becky isn’t here apparently. Weird. I’d look for her in Alyssa’s room.”

“I’m not- I’m not here to talk to Becky. I’m here because I want to talk to you.”

“Me? Oh okay. What’s going on? Is it your roommate? I won’t trade, I’ve been getting the best sleep. Ten out of ten would highly recommend having Becky as your roommate.” You say, face facing down to the floor, your thumb rubbing your pinky because of how nervous you are.

“I’m falling in love again.” Ashley blurts out breaking the silence which filled the room. You lift your head up, looking at Ashley.

“Oh.” You say, you feel your heart break, knowing she was falling in love again. With someone who wasn’t you. You looked back down, biting your lip in an attempt to not cry. “You fell out of love from me, understandable.”

“I feel so stupid but I’m falling in love again.” Ashley says looking at you, taking a few steps towards. “I’m falling in love again.. I’m falling in love with you.”

“Oh.” You say lifting your head back up.

“I haven’t been sleeping well for almost a year. I can’t think, I can’t sleep, I can’t function. Every time I come across any picture of you, I feel like I just fall in love with you over and over again and I can’t stop.”

You stand there in silence, not being able to speak but just stare.

“And I know you’re probably already moving on or already moved on and I wouldn’t blame you. but I-I I’m falling in love with you and it scares me because I don’t know how you feel. I just couldn’t stand and say nothing. I had to say some-.”

You cut Ashley off as you cup her face with you hands, kissing her deeply and softly. You pull away, your foreheads resting against the other.

“I’m falling in love with you again too.” You whisper. “I just also didn’t want to say anything. But being without you has been by far the most painful thing ever. I thought you were over me.”

“I could never be over you. You’re the best of me.” Ashley whispers against your lips. “I want you. Realizing that I was falling in love with you again scared me, I didn’t know if you still loved me.”

“I thought I was but every time I saw you those feelings came back around. I could never stop loving you Ash.”

“I can’t stop loving you and I don’t want to stop.” Ashley says cupping your face, shaking her head as she looks into your eyes.

She knew she was finally getting out of the labyrinth in her head. And you finally knew where the plane was heading, it had landed.

“I don’t want to stop loving you either. Never.”

[0-r-a-y-0]

hey pooks 😛 fic idea 😍 jasper and nick go get a christmas tree and drive around looking at lights 😋 is this a short request? yes. do i think you’ll make a fic that makes me wanna read it to my grandchildren when i’m 90? yes.

Christmas Tree— Romantic #13

In which: Matt and Chris leave it up to Nick to get a new Christmas tree. But he can’t do that alone, can he?

I actually fucking love this idea omgggg even though I didn’t make it that short 😛

“Do you guys want to help decorate?!” Nick asked excitedly, barging into the room.

“You’re just now decorating? Thought you would’ve done that before Thanksgiving.” Matt commented.

“Low on motivation, high on Christmas spirit.” He shrugged. “Now you want to help or not?”

“Yeah, I got nothing better to do anyways.” Chris replied, getting off the couch and putting his phone in his back pocket. Matt only nodded, getting up as well.

“Also, I don’t know where the tree went. I looked everywhere and I found all the other decorations.” Nick claimed, opening a bin and taking out some of the decorations.

“We were putting it away last year and the stand broke, remember?” Matt explained.

“No? Why didn’t you guys tell me? We could’ve gotten a new one when they were on sale!” He says.

“It’s fine, how about you go get a new one.” Chris suggested. “Have Jasper take you, he’s coming over in a little bit anyways.”

Nick just stared at him for a moment before rolling his eyes. “Yeah, whatever, I’ll call him.”

Another twenty minutes of the triplets putting up random snowmen and fake snow all over the house, Jasper walks in. Nick walks up to him giving him a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

“You ready to go?” He asked.

“Please! Take me away from my idiotic brothers.” Nick joked, waving to his brothers before walking out the door.

“What kind of tree should we get? One from a store or like a real tree?” The redhead wondered, scrolling through his Spotify to pick a song.

“I don’t really think it matters, either way it’s going to be at a store and it’s just a tree that’s going to be up for a month maybe. But you better hurry and pick a song, I can’t stand listening to Taylor Swift any longer.” Jasper answered, staring ahead of him.

“Okay, okay!” Nick exclaimed, picking the first song he saw. “Ooo I love this song!”

“How do you have so much Christmas spirit?” He asked.

“Huh? Oh, I don’t know. Just do, I guess.” The other shrugged.

“Why didn’t you guys get a new tree when they were on sale? Christmas shit is always on sale after Christmas.” Jasper confirmed.

“That’s what I told them! I didn’t even know we needed a new tree until today!” Nick stated. “Straight people are so dumb.”

Jasper pulls into a parking lot and parks the car. “Agreed. Don’t understand how you put up with them.” He claimed sarcastically, unlocking and getting out his car.

“I don’t understand either.” Nick said, getting out of the vehicle and looking at the sky. “Damn, it’s only six and the sun is already setting.”

“Yeah, it’s like winter, dude. That’s what happens.” Jasper replies.

“Ew, don’t call me “dude”. You make it seem like we’re like bros or something.” The redhead grimaced.

“I mean, we’re going into a Home Depot, that’s like the straightest store ever, dude.” The tan skinned boy confirmed.

They both walk into the Home Depot, looking around and trying to find the Christmas trees. When they do, Nick takes the time to look at and inspecting all of them thoroughly before narrowing it down to the ones he liked best.

“I think I’m going to get this one.” He finally decided. “Looks like one we used to have when we were kids.”

Nick pauses for a second, thinking. “We just need one of those pushy things.”

“Pushy things? Carts you mean?” Jasper questioned.

“Well. We’re gonna need a cart too because we need to get more ornaments. But that other thing.”

“A platform truck?” The curly haired boy wondered.

“Yeah, that thing.”

“Okay, let’s go.”

They walk all the way back to the front of the store to get the carts and walking back to get the Christmas tree. Nick grabs the tree and sets it on the truck.

“Do you want to get the ornaments real quick? It’s just the next isle over.” Jasper asks.

“Yeah, we got to be quick though. I don’t want anyone trying to take my tree. It’s the last one.” Nick says.

The redhead follows the other down the isle and they grab a pack of ornaments, Nick taking the time to look at individual ones for him and his brothers. He grabs a shark for Matt, headphones for Chris, and an Edward Scissorhands one for himself. They walk back and quickly get the tree and walking to the check out.

“Don’t tell Matt and Chris, but I’m going to use our shared money.” Nick laughs, sliding the card and paying.

They load everything into the back of Jasper’s vehicle before getting in. “It’s so dark now. How long were we in there?”

“Uhhh, almost an hour.” The curly haired boy answered, looking at the time.

“I spent that much time looking at trees?” Nick inquired.

“No, mostly you walking around and looking at other decorations and me telling you that you don’t need it. I saved you like a thousand bucks.”

“Oh…” Nick trailed off, looking out the window. “Look at all the lights. More people need to go all out when decorating. I want to drive around and have all my senses stimulated with colors and bright lights and Christmas.”

“There’s this light show place not far from here. They go all out every year and do something different.” Jasper claimed.

“Oh my god. Can we go?” Nick lit up, immediately turning to look at him.

“Yeah, sure. We should get food first though.”

“Oh hell yeah! Taco Bell?”

“Yeah, okay. I’m good with that.”

They go through the drive through and get their food, now driving to the light show. From a distance, they were still able to see all the lights. It illuminated the sky and everything around it.

“So it’s a neighborhood that goes all out on decorating the outside of their house with lights? And we vote on which house looks the best and whoever wins gets like money?” Nick clarified, almost shocked with the concept.

“Yeah, I go like every year. Each house always does something different.” Jasper repeats.

“That actually makes me so happy.” The redhead smiles.

“I know it does, babe.” Jasper responded, laying his hand on Nick’s thigh as he continued to drive.

When they first get there, they notice cars driving slowly in front of them, taking the time to look at every house. Nick pulls up the website to vote for the houses, marking what would be his first three places.

The bright colored lights shine in their faces, Nick getting multiple pictures of Jasper for his photography account on Instagram, which seemed to only be filled with him lately.

They enjoyed looking at every house, Nick getting excited at the different themes. Some were the Grinch, Home Alone, and countless of other popular Christmas movies. But then, Jasper said.

“Hey, isn’t that that one guy? I don’t know his name but he’s from that Arthur movie or something, isn’t he?”

“WHAT?!” Nick yelled, sitting up to look where his boyfriend was pointing at. “OH MY GOD. It is! No way someone did an Arthur Christmas theme!” He exclaimed with joy.

He takes out his phone and takes a video of the whole drive past it, sending it to his brothers and just then seeing the multiple missed messages from them. Mostly asking where he was since he had been gone for so long. He simply just tells them about the light show and going to Home Depot then turning his phone off, enjoying the rest of the time with his boyfriend and the lights.

[purpleparasol]

Idk what to caption this so heres some bad writing from me below the cut

[In MultiMedia Mixup, where this takes place, is a imaginary series by me and an online friend. The cast of proseka within MMM can speak English and are fine with anthropomorphic animals.]

*wxs brainstorming their next show*

Emu: It would be SUUUUPER wonderhoy to do thi-

???: Hello? Is this the Wonder Stage?

Tsukasa: Well, yes but we arent open yet but you can enjoy the rides in the meantime.

???: No, Im not a guest, Im the new hire.

Emu: New hire? AH! I remember now!

Tsukasa: Huh? What do you mean?

Emu: Last week I was going all sneaky-sneaky in Nene's friends list on Thermostat and found a profile who looked interesting!

Nene: (W-why were you in my friend's list Emu? Also, its just Thermos, not Thermostat)

Emu: The account said he does acting so i thought we could see his skills in person! He sent me an audition video and it was super wonderhoy so i invited him to work here!

Tsukasa: Hm. Well I was invited the same way so...

TENMA TSUKASA, TEN AS IN THE HEAVENS ABOVE AND MA, AS THE PEGASUS THAT SOARS THROUGH THE SKY!!!

Emu: Im Otori Emu! The one who hired you!

Rui: I am Kamishiro Rui, the director and the girl hiding behind Nenerobo is Kusanagi Nene-

???: Wait, Did you say Kusanagi?

Rui: Yes I did.

???: Kusanagi? This is your troupe?!

Nene: Y-yeah, it is.

???: I never expected them to be this loud but,

Hoss: My name is Hoss Warner. I knew Kusanagi from a series we both like.

Tsukasa: Well, you are just in time! We are planning our next show and would like to see you in action!

Hoss: Oh! Well, give me the rundown and ill try and give advice.

WxS: Okay!

Rui: And thats a wrap! We will all take a 15 minute break.

Hoss: (Hm, that was fun. Barely broke a sweat. Now Ill just listen to music a-)

Hoss: (Huh? "Untitled"? I dont remember downloading this song before.)

Hoss: (Cant hurt to give it a listen-)

<SEKAIIIIIIII DE>

Hoss: WUH?! WHAT!?

Rui: Huh? What was that bright flash of light? And did Hoss just scream?

[Idk what to write next]

[okwritingandpain]

Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da: The Beatles x Reader

Chapter 14

"I can't believe that happened." Y/N muttered as she looked around frantically outside. George and Ringo looked at each other and whispering behind her. 

"Y/N." George said, putting a hand on her shoulder. "John told you that he and Aunt Mimi didn't get along very well, right?" 

"He very much implied it." She replied, watching Ringo and George exchange another glance. 

"This happens...almost every time we come here, but...I never seen him...have this reaction and definitely not with Paul involved." George explained.

"You're bloody blind, George. He was getting defensive. You saw how he reacted to you and John. He's obviously jealous." Ringo snapped.

"Of what, Ringo?" George hissed turning to glare at Y/N. The three stood in silence for what felt like forever. Ringo finally made a deep sigh as he walked up to one of the windows to check on the commotion.

"Of Y/N. I should have known it would go like this. I could just tell that Paul was bursting at the seems. It's almost like he just knew something about you, Y/N." Ringo muttered. George didn't seem to be listening to Ringo as be paced the grass angrily.

"What do you mean by that?" She asked, walking over to where Ringo stood.

"Paul always talked about this song. Yesterday or something and he remembered you playing the piano with him." He explained, watching John and Paul yell at each other. The two looked absolutely furious. So in the end she had messed it all up. The whole point of her being there was that she was supposed to prevent everything and now...it was worse somehow.

"How do we fix this?" She asked, heading back to the door.

"I don't know if we can. They have to talk this out." Ringo tried to reason with her. George came up behind the two.

"Yes, give them time. They obviously aren't in any mood to be in a relationship of any kind. Maybe Y/N should look for someone better, hm?" George put on a smug look. She couldn't believe it. She had messed up everything and now everyone was different. They changed...Ringo and George were arguing their brains out and it all became so overwhelming. She couldn't take it as she ran from the house and down the street. Her senses overwhelmed her until tears flowed from her eyes. There was nothing she could do. Nothing. She had failed Paul and everyone else! Running across the street, one of Y/N's hairpins fell. Going to pick it up, the brightest lights flashed in her eyes. Then everything went dark.

"What did you do?" A familiar voice asked. Y/N's eyes slightly opened as she tried to get a sense of her surroundings. She was on something black like a piano. Wait she was on a piano. A very modern piano. Sitting up, she was shocked to see the Paul McCartney that had put her in the past in the first place.

"What?" She asked, not quite understanding what was happening.

"Now your awake, huh?" Paul's face was stern and cold. "Do you realize what you have done?"

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to--"

"There is nothing to apologize for...except for breaking up our bloody band!" Paul snapped as he pulled out his phone. Strange enough, the search engine said that the Beatles broke up in 1962.

"That really sent you all over the edge?" She asked, scrolling through the articles.

"Yes, your death. That's what sent everyone over the edge." Paul hissed, snatching his phone back from her. Her death? She must have been hit by a car sent back here.

"What happened to everyone?" Y/N asked, confused as ever.

"One thing you did do right was that everyone is alive." Paul explained, "None of us reached any crazy popularity except for...believe it or not Ringo."

"You've got to be kidding." She replied. Ringo of all people. He was talented that's for sure, but the most popular out of the four of them? Now that was a stretch.

"Honestly, I'm shocked too, but now we have a more serious issue. Getting the band back together." Paul muttered.

"Are you sending me back in time again?" Paul shook his head.

"We're going to make the biggest comeback in history." Paul smirked.

"And you still need me?" She asked, raising her eyebrow.

"Now more than ever, Luv." He said. "You are going to bring everyone together. They all think that you are dead, but we know the truth and now...and now everything can be fixed." 

"Why do you want this to be fixed? What is there to fix? Life played out the way it was for a reason and now you want to change it!" She snapped, getting off the piano to confront Paul. 

"You went along with it!" 

"I had no choice! You blasted me into yesterday or whatever and now you expect me to work with you. You're Paul flipping McCartney and yet you can't even be what people loved." She frowned.

"I play music and give people the joy of music. I've never heard of anyone who looked up to be for anything but my music!" 

"They look up to the fact that you never gave up and took the easy road. You and the rest of the band got through so much together! Now you're just trying to fix something that can mend what's broken, but that's not how life works, Paul! Life happens and yes it hurts for the longest time but one day it all changes because you realize that there is no point in dwelling on something that can't and won't change!" Y/N grabbed anything that she could remember leaving there and she stormed out. Paul didn't know what to say as she left. What was he supposed to say to that? He just wanted the glory days back. He knew what he had to do to fix something that could be mended. His relationship with the one person he didn't even realize he had screwed over. 

"You say I can't mend anything when I know I can mend our relationship. Just like the others, this can all change." Paul opened his phone to call someone. 

"Hello?" 

"Hi, is this John Lennon. I'm sure you know who I am..."

[winderlylandchime]

1/2 Finally 4x01!!! The new intro started playing and he got up so fucking fast as if he was watching a game ‘WAIT WHAT?! THIS IS DIFFERENT! OH MY GOD THIS IS COOL AS FUCK! I like this more!! *tries to sing along while not knowing the song* ..cue…BEGIN…pulse..YEAH i fuck with this. And of course the intro ends on Brian walking away. He is the moment!’ ‘Ohhhh Drag Queen moment! I fuck with this. Hi BRIAN! Look at them just hanging out in THEIR loft, damn he is broke as fuck, huh? *said in an affectionate aww type of voice* THEY ARE PARTNERS! He really hates accepting any type of help, huh? Brian maybe you should listen to your own advice from two seasons ago about a man knowing when to accept help. Wait shit, i just remembered the nothing noble about being poor thing. Well fuck Brian’ It briefly showed Mel and Linds and he was so disappointed until Britin popped up again ‘this is what I want every episode, Brian and Justin. And that’s it’ ‘I am genuinely surprised that Hunter and Mike haven’t killed each other. Proud of them’ ‘Brian having lunch with Ben and Linds AND mel? Is he okay? Aw Brian and Justin being sarcastic is one of my favorite things in the world. (Deb says Mikey and her talk 3x a day) Okay, three times a day is…yeah. I mean even I don’t..actually never mind. OH HE IS GONNA KILL EVERYONE IF THEY DONT STOP PITYING HIM. But Bri Bri you are broke as a jok- HA he is gonna steal Bald dudes clients’ ‘i like this drag queen singing in between moments. Its been a while since I went to a drag show. I wonder if they miss me back home..i mean i did tell them I was leaving but still, i hope they miss me- oh ted. I was trying to forget that horrible party-BLAKEY! I’m so happy that he’s good now. EMMETT! Im glad he came to visit but I rea- Ted what the hell is wrong with you? He didn’t do shit wrong to you, why are you being bitchy? No Emy no, blakey didnt do anything wrong. But damn it i get Emy is hurt but fucking hell this isnt it. GIVE ME BRIAN BACK’ brian shows up on screen with Vance ‘HA WHAT DID I SAY? I CAN FEEL WHEN MY BOY IS UP! Wait that..sounds..weird. Of course he looks great, he always does. Oh so now you love him, fuck you baldy, Brian youre better than this. I like his hair. *does jazz hands* spikey. Oh baldy knows that Brian could destroy him if he pulls a Justin Timberlake and goes solo. DO IT BRI BRI! I didnt plan on him having his own company but DO IT!!!!’ ‘How did Mike already lose Hunte- HES HUSTLING AGAIN? *randomly starts laughing* It’s really funny hearing Mike call him little asshole when they’re the same height.’ Ted and Blake are on right now where he’s cleaning the floor ‘ohhhh i think this is gonna be bad. I hope im wrong because i like Blakey but this is looking like you know that thing where you get a crush on your savior or your therapist or something like that? I know my shit..i think’ ‘OH MY GOD WHAT DID THEY DO TO BRIANS CAR? Id rip their head off? I mean the car sucks but damn. Wait i forgot to focus on the important stuff: Brian looks good as fuck! CAN HE STOP KISSING HIM?’ ‘ITS BRIAN AGAIN!(Brian says ‘because no ones close friendship means more to me than yours’) aww Bri Bri, i feel the same way. Im glad you can agree that we have a deep connectio- OH HE IS GONNA GO SOLO! HES PULLING A BEYONCÉ! YOU GO GIRL! I really like the drag queen moments.. i miss my girls back home, i gotta call them.’ ‘AW JUSTIN CAME UP WITH THE COMPANY NAME!! KINNETIK! I fuck with that. I think i need a new shirt (i said No at this point) *looks at me and does jazz hands* merch. Of course Blondie is the one to help him come up with the name. LOOK AT THEM ALL HAPPY AND IN LOVE! Aw they wanna hang out with Emy! I NEEDED THIS TRIO! Make them hang out like when they danced together. The new dream team!’

The new intro! It really reminds me of the OG intro to the OG Beverly Hills 90210 (not to date myself).

It is so hard to watch Emmett and Ted during this arc.

Brian looks sooooooo good in S4.

OH HE IS GONNA GO SOLO! HES PULLING A BEYONCÉ! Truly, I looked it up and she went solo in 2003 right as this was being filmed (if I've got my timelines correct).

AND YES JUSTIN CAME UP WITH KINNETIK. He's named both Gus and Kinnetik (swoon).

The new dream team - I wish!

[teddy-the-teddybear]

Angeleyes

Eddie x reader

Warnings: angst, Eddie's kinda a jerk

Summary: You and eddie have been in a relationship for about a year, but he starts getting distant, and he told you not to worry. Ut how are you not suppose to worry when he his with the new girl, Claudia

Last night, I was taking a walk along the river

And I saw him together with a young girl

And the look that he gave her made me shiver

You have a lot on your mind right now. You had exams coming up, and you were afraid your relationship was coming to an end. So to clear your mind you decided to take a walk, you've been doing this for a couple weeks now. 

As you were walking through the woods that leads to lovers lake, you heard a familiar laugh. "Eddie?", you followed his voice, and then suddenly heard a female voice. But not just any female voice, the one of Claudia.

You forward your eyebrows in confusion, what was he doing out here? He said he had a headache and wanted to rest.

You didn't want to think much about it till you saw him look at her the way he looks at you. You let out a shaky sigh and turned around. You saw enough. So you went home and cried yourself to sleep.

Then I thought maybe I should walk right up to her and say

Ah-ha-ha, it's a game he likes to play

The next morning, you woke up and instantly remembered what happened. You walked to the bathroom and immediately saw how red your eyes were. In that moment you realized that you could care less about how you looked. 

When you got to school everyone was looking at you, they weren't use to seeing you look so vulnerable. Once you got to your locker you saw Eddie at Claudia's locker. You grabbed your stuff, and looked back at Eddie and saw Claudia whispering in his ear and whatever she said made him blush. 

You ran to class before anyone could see your tears in your eyes. 

When lunch rolled around, you sat with Robin, Vickie, and Nancy. You didn't want to sit with Eddie and deal with him ignoring you, or him just giving you one word answers. When you looked behind you at Eddie's table, your heart broke. You saw Claudia in your spot right next to Eddie. You wish you could tell her that it's a game he likes to play.

Sometimes when I'm lonely, I sit and think about him

And it hurts to remember all the good times

You were sitting on your bed studying. When you stopped and heard you and Eddie's song play from your Walkman. You remembered that day.

You and Eddie were sitting in the back of his van at lovers lake. You were laying on a couple of blankets and you were drawing shapes on his shirt covered chest. 

"Eddie?", you looked up at him as he hummed as a way to say he was listening, "Do you think we will be together forever?"

Eddie smiled, "I know we'll be together forever, I'd be crazy to let you go", he kissed your head

You looked up from your book with tears in your eyes, "I guess you're crazy Eddie" 

And I wonder does it have to be the same

Every time when I see him, will it bring back all the pain

You were walking towards Eddie's trailer, when you saw him and Claudia get out of his van.

You ran up and called out to him, "Eddie!" 

He stopped and turned around to look at you, he told Claudia to go into the trailer.

When you got up to him, you hit his chest "I hate you! What happened not having to worry about her? Huh?!"

He just looked at you while you broke down, "Listen I just got bored and didn't know how to end it"

That made you snap, "So instead of breaking up with me, you go and cheat on me?! Are you stupid or something?"

Eddie just looked at you with the bored look in his eyes, "I didn't mean to fall for her, it just happened."

You shook your head and started to walk away, "I hope it was worth it Eddie. I really do," you left him watching your back walk away. 

From that day on, it was like nothing happened between you and Eddie. You don't know what hurt more, that you lost Eddie or seeing them all happy and have no guilt for what they did.

Look into his angel eyes

One look and you're hypnotized

It had been almost four months since you and Eddie broke up. You were getting ready for graduation. You had been avoiding Eddie at all costs. So you didn't know how today was going to go. You started slowly feeling like you could live without Eddie and you could be happy without him in your life. 

Once you got your diploma and everyone threw their caps, you were taking photos with your family. That's when you could hear Eddie's laughter, when you looked at him, he was already looking at you. And you were hypnotized by his angel eyes, but you looked away, and you didn't feel any heartbreak.

You saw Eddie and Claudia kissing by his van, and you wish you could tell he that, "He'll take your heart and you must pay the price" and you should know because you already paid the price, now it's her turn.

[libzarzar]

That's already fcng start of a morning why I'm thinking about those chapters from Pet Shop of Horrors with girl and her singing birdy and yoohanhim in it... can't I just fall asleep without breaked heart...

So if you don't know about that manga - go ahead and read it, it's collection of short stories about a lot of human's things and, besides, how you can make mistakes even when you're in love and care and hoping for the best for your loved ones. Huh that manga definitely were a traumatic experience for little me but that was wonderful

And also there is sneaky seller yeah dream-uncle

stop here if you don't want spoilers or emotionaldamage idk.

Even if I don't remember all of it. And also this is a horror story so be aware

At first you need to know the context. That story was about rich girl, reached to the PetShop, seeking for a new perfect pet. And Count D of course has one. He told about beautiful bird from the country far away with most miraculous voice in the whole world. And girl followed him in the show room. But what she saw here wasn't a bird. That was a most beautiful boy in tons of jewels with wings on his back. She complained, scared of buying human being, but count D stood his ground.

There is only a bird in that room, it doesn't mean how she sees him. And that bird can be a her pet. If she will follow the rules.

Of course she made a deal, he catched her heart immediately. And she did all what D said her, she gave a whole winter garden to it, prepared best fruits for meals. And he song most beautiful songs every night, with truly amazing voice.

That was such a wonderful time. Until she get a painful thought.

That bird is probably so lonely. He is now here, in foreign country and can't meet up with his specie while he is in cage. Probably he singing so much, trying to reach for someone. She should find him a pair and then he will be more happy. And have beautiful kids, she will be so happy to see his nestlings

So Court D did as she asked. And she brushed over all "are you sure" questions.

Girl-bird wasn't such colorful at all. After she was brought into the winter garden, on front of her fabulous pair and hundreds of flowers she looked even more blank.

Girl just wanted her beloved pet to be happy.

So she again said as she was told to - she left them alone for a few nights, without any visits, just listen to the unfinishing song each night and couldn't stop worrying.

And her will broke as few day past. Because singing suddenly stopped.

Her pretty lovely bird were left there without food for so long. Probably so exhausted and hungry. She should've check on him, pass some snacks. D can't know everything, she totally wouldn't ruin anything, she's bird's master after all.

And she took some fruits and opened the door tho the garden. And there were unusual silence.

And there were torn body of her lovely bird, almost eaten by female. As she should for feeding her child inside of her. She ate him all that days but he continued to sing until she finally reached to his throat. For his loved ovneress.

D told not to get inside just so female could've finished her meal, consumed body without any left. But girl was as impatient as at the minute she decided to get a nestling. And now she lose her mind, crying over cold body

They loved each other. But they don't know what to do with all that love at all

💫 sO NOW AS/IF YOU ARE INFORMED ABOUT ORIGINAL 💫

Yoohanhim

bird-Han Sooyoung, standing over the almost finished Kim Dokja's body, covered in his blood with coldness in her eyes.

And Yoo Joonghyuk, staying in the moonlight from the glass ceiling, with that burning feeling, just started to crawl from his chest to his face. And we know that that guilt, that loss, that feeling of killing Dokja by his own will.

It will shatter him to the bloody dust

I see that scene on my eyelids I want to draw it so much ugh

Also found picture yeey. hope that's not prohibited..

[snrld]

“ why can’t you let me in? what are you so afraid of? ”  (;u;)

A Meme I Cannot Remember oop ♫ @irxnmaiden​ ♫ Accepting

For someone who can say so much during a two-minute song, voice breaking with each impassioned verse and shoulders heaving after each complete set ... Scathing lyrics that might as well burn their way through his notebooks, eyes blazing with icy fire as he screeched them out ‘til his voice was hoarse. He sure wasn’t the best when it comes to mushy, emotional stuff.

He wasn’t built for that. After years of soloing his way through life, holing himself away in the grimy little town no one cared about, the only one who was so staunchly against the very thing that made Galar what it was. Thus, the philosophy of “if no one was going to help, then do it on your own” sank deep in his head. A mean independent streak. Of course he struggled with letting others in!

Concrete walls reinforced with sharp metal spikes that served as his defenses. Maybe he’d let his guard down around her. A mistake, he was beginning to think. It wasn’t like he came to live in Olivine, but he’d be damned if he didn’t think Jasmine made it feel like a second home. A nice little seaside refuge, away from the stress and noise clouding his mind. Like a salty breeze. Knowing he’d have to return home (something he’d normally look forward to), felt a whole lot more bitter than expected now. Like summer descending into autumn.

Her words struck him like a Bullet Punch, mind going blank, eyes widening. He froze, halting in his walking away from her. See, this is why no one dared to befriend him when he was younger, this is why no one bothered to assist him during Spikemuth’s beginnings. He certainly lives up to the Dark Type’s reputation, huh? Something cold, distant, lined with spikes thoroughly preventing anyone from getting close enough to strike.

Yet, he knew she didn’t mean anything malicious or threatening by asking those who questions. Two questions that... sank right into his heart like fangs.

Head hung, swallowing thickly, he ultimately let out a hoarse laugh. He managed to look just barely over his shoulder at her before saying, “Y’think I wouldn’t be scared of anythin’, huh? Someone all tough like me?” Despite himself, he turned to face her fully. “Now listen... Y’know how I told y’how I’ve heard time after time how Dark Types’ve been called th’ spawn of Giratina? Well... I’ve heard th’ same said ‘bout me.”  Voice finally broke, makeup threatening to spill down his face, a set of fingernails dug into his chest. “An’ when you’ve heard time an’ time again how y’re not a good person, y’- y’... start t’believe it. I gotta sound dramatic, yeah? But, that’s why I’m scared, okay? Scared of you actually bein’ somethin’ t’me when almost no one bothered t’give th’ same kindness y’do!” He staggered forward, chest heaving, messy strands falling in his face he didn’t care to brush away.

“I... I care ‘bout you. I do. Arceus, I do. An’ I don’t wanna leave.” Childish, pathetically childish.

[icharchivist]

the funny thing with discussing the possibility of characters with abandon issues is that i can work the magic of “ahah this is a headcanon ofco- wait isn’t that one of my symptoms, wait, did the character have that to start with, did i overread it, or did i just project on them by complete accident” and then i end up in a crisis for ten minutes not knowing if i’m driven toward characters with abandon issues and only realize when i’m in too deep that it’s why i did, or if the moment i end up loving a character i just go “:) and YOU take my abandon issues, YOU DO. :)”

[marmixedwithabitofintellect]

Hi there! I wanted to make a requests if it’s possible, since today Harry’s House got leaked, could you do a one shot/blurb of Harry and Y/N finding out that the album got leaked and how would Harry react and how would YN try to console him?🥺

Thank you for your request lovie, I am very sorry it took me so long, I was out of town and didn't have my laptop with me 🤍 I am still appalled at what happened and my heart hurts for Harry, I am glad this happened while I was asleep and that by the time I logged into Twitter links were taken down. Please remember that this was years of work by Harry and his team, so the least they deserve is the respect by the fans.

Through the Hardships

April 20,2022.

Los Angeles, California. 4:45 AM

I shushed once more and closed the nursery door making my way back to our room. The transition from the bassinet to the crib was progressing, but I was just tempted to bring them in with me. I closed the door to our room and laid down next to Harry.

I was just beginning to fall into a deep sleep when I was rudely woken up by the shrill ringing of Harry’s phone, he groaned before answering, “Hello?”, a few seconds later he sat up fairly quickly, “Shit, how?”, that made me sit up too, he sighed pulling a hand through his hair

“Okay, send the invite and give me five”, he hung up and took a shuddering breath, I reached to squeeze his arm before speaking, “Hey, what’s going on?”, “They leaked it, they had so little respect for me and my personal things that they went through and leaked it”, “What are you talking about H?”

He pulled back from me and stood up from the bed, “God are you stupid? The album Y/N, they leaked my album”, I was shocked and trying to process what he told me, he reached to squeeze my hand, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have called you stupid love”

I nodded, honestly, I hadn’t realized he had called me that, “How can I help H?”, “I have a meeting in a few, I’ll let you know what we decide, how about you get a little sleep huh? We have had a few rough nights”, he kissed my forehead and left the room.

Los Angeles, California. 9:45 AM

A few hours later I woke up, after sitting down I realized that since putting Lovebug down I hadn’t fed them, so I started making my way to the nursery, when I opened it my heart both broke and started beating with love.

Harry was sitting on the rocking chair humming under his breath and holding little love who by the looks had just woken up and was in between sleep and waking up, he kissed their little head before turning to look into the door where he saw me and gave me an apologetic smile, “Hi baby, I’m sorry, I needed a cuddle”

I laughed a little before sitting down on the floor by them, “You don’t have to apologize honey, I understand and I got to say, that first cuddle is the best”, I squeezed his knee, “How did the meeting go?”, he sighed, “It was rough, my team is still trying to figure out how it happened, we’ve taken the links down but they are out there”

“And you? How are you?”, he looked at me, “Honest?”, I smiled, “Always”, he reached for my hand and gave it a squeeze, “I’m bummed, I am sad, angry and I feel helpless; this was the album I was the most excited to put out there, and for them to just steal it? I mean, I understand ‘Medicine’, ‘Anna’ and even the One Direction songs, but the album, why?”, I stood up a little to wipe the tears that were starting to fall

“I read some of the tweets and reactions, they are all really positive which makes me excited, but there were others who expressed their sadness and disappointment because they were waiting for the release, and they listened to it by accident”

I stood up and hugged him, “I’m sorry H, really sorry”, he kissed my neck, “I am too, but what is done is done”, we pulled back a little, when we did, I could feel my breasts were swollen and in dire need of a feed, and he noticed too because he stood up and said, “Here, why don’t you sit down and nurse? I will take a bath”, I nodded and when I received the baby, I kissed him before he exited.

When Lovebug finished feeding they were ready for their nap, so I laid them down, I exited the nursery and I went into our bedroom where I saw that Harry was still on the bath, so I took the opportunity to prepare some things to help him feel better.

I went downstairs and started preparing toad-in-the-hole, along with a brew of his favorite coffee, while that finished cooking, I went into the linen closet where I had hidden the blanket I had knitted for him a few days ago, I guess this was the perfect moment to give it to him.

I then went into the garden where I pulled a little lavender for a lovely finishing detail, I went upstairs and set up everything in the bed along with a little card and returned downstairs to finish preparing breakfast,

Harry. Los Angeles, California. 10:30 AM

The bath had helped me relax and I exited the bathroom, when I looked into the bed and I found a knitted blanket along with some lavender and a lovely letter by my girl, I opened the letter and tears returned to my eyes, This too shall pass, I am proud of you rockstar, you will do great things, through the good and bad it’s you and me, -Y/N

I went downstairs where I was met by the smell of my favorite breakfast and my love finishing plating it up, when she saw me she smiled, “The bath did you well lovie, come here, breakfast is done”, I smiled and helped her bring everything to the table and just before she could sit down I pulled her in for a hug and nuzzled into her neck.

She affectionately started rubbing my hair, after a few seconds I spoke up, “Thank you, I don’t know what I did to deserve you”, she kissed my temple, “I love you H, always together”, I whispered, “Even through the hardships?”, she squeezed me harder, “Especially through the hardships”

Taglist @tinydestinybear @amyleeeee @harry-is-my-sunflower @beachwoodcaferryy @dirtytissuebox @msolbesg @clarawolf22 @harrysficreblog @infinitely-yellow @cherrylovesblog @wherethehellhaveyoubeenharry @harryspirate @kaitieskidmore1 @michellekstyles @qualitygiantshoepsychic @irelilien @futuristicpalacegardenpsychic @shawnsblue @behindmygreyeyes

[nanaaw]

are you happier now? (dazai x reader)

warnings: angst, break up, leaving, portmafia!reader, slight chuuya x reader, fluff at end?

summary: when leaving the port mafia after his best friend died, he left behind his friend and lover, y/n. 

in the port mafia:

you sat mindlessly at the bar, drinking a few beverages with your close friend, akutagawa. more accurately, you were mainly talking with him making short responses. it was a nice day today, or so you thought.

“hey aku, what’s that?” you inquired, hopping off the stool and heading towards a polaroid you spotted. flipping it over, you saw the three familiar faces of the port mafia: oda sakunosuke, ango sakaguchi and dazai osamu. 

this ignited a question in your head. “aku, have you seen osamu today? i don’t think i saw him much since yesterday”. you turned your head towards akutagawa, who was casually drinking beer. 

“no, but from what i remember, dazai-san was on a mission looking for oda-san.” he responded. suddenly, his phone rang. after taking it, akutagawa looked at you with a disappointed expression. “hey... y/n, boss told me to take a mission so i’ll have to leave. we can talk another time?” 

“oh, of course! you better ace the mission, alright? make use of your lessons from your best senpai, me!” you smugly giggled. he smiled before waving and leaving. 

“oof, now i’m alone then... hmm better see what samu’s doing.” you decided to cook some pasta that you recently learnt while waiting for his return. 

----

it was late at night when dazai returned. the soft, cautious footsteps caught your attention while you were training. following the noise, you peeked from the door and saw your boyfriend packing a bag with an empty expression. 

“samu..?” you asked, sleepily. 

he turned to you in surprise before turning back. “y/n.” this surprised you. he would normally greet you with a smile or hug. 

“hey what’s wrong? why’re you packing?” you asked worriedly, walking near him. “are you going somewhere?” an uneasy feeling crawled up your spine as you waited for his reply. nothing.

“osamu, what happpened?” you asked more seriously. he turned to you, cold expression tainted on his face. “listen y/n. i’m leaving. is that not obvious?” a cold tone was laced with his voice. 

“h-huh? you mean on a mission?-” 

“no. the mafia.”

your heart dropped, and you felt as if your life stopped. “what- so suddenly? what about chuuya, what about aku, what about oda and ango?” 

you paused.

“what about me?” 

without turning to you he replied. “there’s nothing that important to me left here anyways. you wouldn’t understand, this is what i have to do.” he replied without giving any details. 

tears welled up in your eyes. “will i see you again though?” your voice broke. 

this wasn’t how you usually were. y/n l/n, one of the port mafia’s best assassins. had the ability to wield many weapons, had a strong power of telekinesis. yet didn’t have the guts to kill anyone. a cheerful and positive girl who gave others hope and fun in their lives. hell, you even helped dazai osamu open up.

“i’m sure you won’t be able to avoid me forever.” 

“dazai osamu, if you just tell me what happened, maybe i can help. or i’ll come with you! i- i love you.” you confessed. 

“there’s nothing you can do to help, l/n.”

you felt defeated. 

blank eyes watched as he packed before heading towards the door. 

“dazai...”

“thank you for the happiness you gave me. i hope you find some place better.” you said, giving him the best smile you could make. 

his hesitation was clear as his hand stopped for it a bit and stilled. his head turned towards you and you could see the slight swirl of regret in his eyes. “thank you. farewell, y/n.” 

those were his last words before he left. your legs felt weak as you collapsed, crying on his bed. you cried yourself to sleep that night, hugging the hoodie he gave you when he told you that he loved you.

heartbreak, one of the worst feelings.

---

4 years later..

you were humming your favourite song as you cooked some cookies for the new person the mafia had held hostage. weird, isn’t it? well, you usually felt bad for them and wanted someone to taste test the desserts you were learning to make.

most of the time, they would be skeptical and refuse, leaving you upset. which is why you always have your best friends chuuya and aku to try them! after packaging them in a tray, you hopped down to the basement. (that’s what it looks like in the anime??)

you could hear the voices of chuuya and the person you’d already recognised as your ex. peeking your head from the staircase, you looked. you could see chuuya aim a knife at dazai’s neck. 

you smirked before activating your power. chuuya and dazai were both perplexed by the knife dancing and wiggling around. anger radiated off chuuya before turning around, facing you. 

“y/n! i was being threatening and you ruined it!” he yelled. this made you burst into laughter. “yeah yeah, tell yourself that.” you skipped towards the two before facing dazai. 

dazai felt a little worried of what you were going to say as you eyed him up and down. “yo, nice coat. i’ve never seen you wear something like that before.” you smiled, raising a thumbs up. “oh yeah, here! try my cookies.”

to be frank, dazai was confused. he broke up with you and you were offering cookies to him. nonetheless, as his usual flirty self, he smirked. “how about you feed them to me since my hands are tied, belladonna. 

you smirked back. “how about you ask chuu to do that. you guys were awfully close just now. i thought you guys were about to kiss.” you teased. after that, you felt a hit to the back of your head.

“shut up n/n, and stop calling me that. it’s weird.” he replied, clearly embarrassed. “why not? it’s cute, and so are you.” you winked at him, his blush deepening. 

dazai watched the interaction, he was happy for you. he wasn’t going to lie and say that he hadn’t had a part of him who still wanted to get to know you, if not as lovers, but just as friends.

“well, i’m going to go check on ryu-kun now! see you guys!” you smiled, holding up a peace sign before running up the stairs. 

chuuya looked at dazai. he was watching your steps up longingly. chuuya thought that maybe if dazai re-entered your life, you would learn how to love people again. just like you used to.