#but i need to just calm down they’ll walk me thru it

[i-eat-lip-gloss]

alr goin to the mall and this store that a solid third of it is just D&D stuff, gonna get some dice, and hope i’m not late for the campaign

[poptod]

Congrats for finishing ur exams! Hope u have time for relaxing in summer :) if u take ficreqs & this is topic ur comfortable writing for I'll have an ask: Kenny having/going thru some body image issues (it came to my mind when in season 2 he was going out w/Dylan he was fussing w/his shirt & being like is it too tight etc.)

Notes: thank u!! honestly its kinda nice to b able to project my own eating disorders on a fictional character lmao. thats twisted as fuck of me. warnings: eating disorders, homophobia, the whole rundown lmao. the reader in this is kind of dumb as fuck but well-informed so do with that what you will WC: 1.4k

+

It happened over the summer.

No one else noticed, but you did. He stopped wearing his big shirts, and the smaller ones now hung over his frame in wrinkles too big for his body. His jaw strengthened, his eyes steely, and his words remained sweet, if not awkward, as ever.

You've talked to him a couple times, but never for long, and his interactions with teenagers as popular as you are are limited and uncomfortable. On his part, he doesn't really know you personally––only as a sort of monarch to a high school. This image of you leaves him stuttering as you trap him against the lockers, surrounded by the silence of a vacant school.

"Wh - what are you –"

"Quiet," you say, glancing up to meet his frantic gaze.

The heat of his stomach moving with rough breaths warms your hands, sliding up his shirt to pull away the fabric and reveal the bare skin. His ribs are showing. From experience you know they didn't use to, but you can't deny the excitement that rushes through you at the sight of his thin waist unobstructed by clothing.

"How'd you lose weight?" You ask, withdrawing your hands from his midsection while keeping him stuck between lockers and you. You had never claimed to be anything but straightforward, almost violently so.

He shifts his weight on his feet, shoulders tensing till they reach his ears.

"Why do you care? You don't even know me," he says with a glare focused on the floor beside you.

"Your name is Khaleel but everyone calls you Kenny because people are dickbags, and you're always hanging out with that Larry kid. And I know for a fact you weren't this skinny," you say, tugging the belt of his loose pants to peer down.

"Don't," he grits out, and he writhes in your grasp, attempting to escape.

Seeing his discomfort, you withdraw your hand once more, and look him in the eye.

"I've seen things like this before," you say, boring into the soul behind his own eyes. "I've been this thing before. Tell me how you did it."

"I..." he pauses, searching your expression for any give in your request, before he gives up with a sigh. "I stopped eating meals for a week."

"Why?" You ask in a much softer tone than your previous, your fingers brushing over his unsteady hands.

"I hate how I look," he admits in a broken voice, eyes tinted red as tears form on the edges. "I'm sick of being unattractive and unwanted. I just wanted to be appealing to someone, for once."

"You're wanted," you say, beginning with a much-needed assurance. "High school is absolute ass and everything that happens in it has nearly no affect on your life. You're going to grow up, and you're going to find cities full of people who want to kiss you. The effects of purposeful starvation on your body and mind are not worth this temporary conformity to the American beauty standard."

Now he just looks confused. You sigh, exasperated by kids who don't seem to get your line of thinking pertaining to society and its expectations of adults and teenagers.

"This is such a small part of your life that can be so deeply enjoyed if you do it right. Don't ruin it with this," you say, and your own voice cracks, strained by the tension stuck in your throat. "You're never going to be skinny enough for this disease. Not even if you're ten pounds."

These words––they're all birthed by what you wish someone had told you. What would've stopped you from doing this to yourself.

The tears long building round his eyes fall at last, creating streams down his cheeks that he covers up by hiding his face in his hands. He falls into you, leaning his weight on your body, and hiding his face (which is still hidden in his hands) in the crook of your neck. Knuckles of his fingers dig into the sensitive skin there, but it is no hard task to ignore it.

You wrap your arms around the boy, holding him tight to you and running your fingers through his hair. Chest to chest, hips to hips, legs nearly stepping over one another. Muffled sobs wrack his weakened shoulders.

"I know," you whisper. It's all the sound you can manage. "It's alright. I know."

"I just wanna be wanted," he chokes out, shifting to hide himself deeper in your touch.

"You already are," you say in a hum, turning to kiss his temple.

"No," he says, shaking his head. "No, no, my parents don't even want me. No one does."

"What do you mean your parents don't want you?" You ask as a deep concern settles itself within you.

He won't pull away, and as much as you want to see his expressions, you know he needs your touch more than anything in this moment.

"I haven't seen them in weeks, they won't let me back into the house. I don't know what I did wrong. I don't..." he trails off as a new burst of tears shivers throughout his body, weakening his already frail limbs.

"They kicked you out?" You ask.

"... yeah," he says, sniffing.

His hands finally leave his tear-covered face, and he wraps them around you as tight and close as he can, shifting his head to the side to truly lie on your shoulder, with his nose nudging your neck. His hands cling to the back of your shirt, nails almost digging into your back as his tears soak your shoulder.

"Adults aren't infallible," you say, your own words now muffled as your chin rests on the crest of his head. "One day they'll realize their mistake, and they'll want you more than anything."

He goes quiet for a while, still sniffling, before he says in a trembling voice, "but I want to be desired now. I don't understand why no one wants me."

"I actually know for a fact that someone in the school very much wants you," you say without hesitation. You can't be the only one who sees how sweet this guy is.

"Really?" He sniffs and pulls away, but his hands linger on your waist. "Who?"

Your mind pulls a blank before it hits you like a trainwreck––it's you. You're the one that wants him. Maybe you are the only one to see him at all, and that realization leaves you stumped. Could you so plainly tell him? Would that be taking advantage of him in his state?

Whatever, you think, still staring blankly ahead as Kenny awaits your answer. This guy needs a pick-me-up.

"It's... me," you say in your most awkward voice since middle school. You cringe inwardly. It's like you're giving him bad news.

His mouth falls open, and he stares at you like you're the only thing to look at in the whole world.

"With..." he jabs himself in the chest with his own finger as he points to himself, ".. me?"

"That is what I just said, yes," you say, nodding.

He tries to stutter out a sentence, something along the lines of why, and you hardly want to hear what he has to say. None of it is going to be true. It's all muck about him not being worth it, and as he grows more frantic, you know you have to calm him down yourself.

Your eyes shut and you lean in blindly, having memorized his face from lunches spent staring at him from a table across the room. Lips mould to his and the words fizzle out, devolving into soft whines as the tail end of his sobbing dies out, suffocated by his first kiss.

He leans into you once more, resting his unsure hands gingerly upon your shoulders. You take his wrists, never parting from his lips as you pull him nearer, till his elbows rest on your shoulders and he holds you closer than before. When his hands tangle into your hair unprompted, you hum, fall, and pin him back against the lockers.

"Hey!"

Someone is shouting at you from down the hallway. You sigh and part from him, turning with a blasé look to meet one of the teachers.

"No making out in the hallway," she scolds but says nothing more, continuing to walk into the next room.

You turn back to Kenny and he's bright red, looking horrified with himself.

"Oh my God," he whispers out as his hands shake ever so slightly.

"It's alright," you murmur, too close to him to stand anything else. You kiss his forehead before you continue, "it's not a big deal. It's alright."

You pull away, looking him in the eye as you say, "come to my house?"

He hesitates.

"I'll make you something to eat. You don't have to eat a lot," you offer.

"... yeah," he says, and nods, looking up to meet your eye. "Yeah, that sounds nice."

[thefanficmonster]

Never Satisfied [Teaser]

Corpse Husband x Original Female Character

Warnings: Language (possibly more?)

Collaboration between Vy & Ashens 🖤

“this criminal is stealing my fires, what the fuck?!“

Life is a rollercoaster, it always has been. One moment he feels at the top of the world and the very next he’s upside down at the bottom, wishing the ride would come to a stop as soon as possible. Things that shouldn’t be difficult, things average people would consider the norm to him were the equivalent of walking on glass, each step sending shocks of pain throughout his body, anxiety pumping his blood with adrenaline that provoked his fight or flight response. And after choosing ‘fight’ so many times, he’s more than prepared to choose ‘flight’.

But as he sits in the Walmart parking lot, he’s talking himself out of that habit of running from discomfort. He doesn’t want to battle it either, he just wants to face it and prove he’s strong enough to defeat it if he tried. Well, anxiety is laughing in his face right now, mocking him by the shaking of his hands and the tight sensation in his gut and throat. He’s here for what’s supposed to be just a quick shopping trip. Just to buy a few things! That’s all he has to do. However, he can’t bring himself to get out of his beige Subaru and walk into the store. 

I’m just hungry, right? Or maybe tired, he thought to himself.

That’s what everyone told him - that anxiety was caused by something simple to solve but hard to realize when your mind is in a frenzy. He’s planning on getting something to eat to calm his nerves. If that doesn’t work, to hell with it. He has been improvising plan B’s all his life, this wouldn’t be anything new. 

With a shaky sigh Corpse looks at his radio, switching stations until his luck smiles at him when he comes across a BONES song and turns it up just enough to not overwhelm his senses. He has been needing some kind of a distraction all day, why not gravitate to the one thing that felt real, as if sent to save him from the mess within his head. Putting the car into drive, he pulls out of the parking lot and into the nearest fast food drive thru. A plain burger with cheese so his stomach doesn’t act up, fries and an unsweetened tea. 

This will have to do.  He isn’t even hungry, and the thought of the greasy food only made his stomach churn worse but he knew he needed to eat something in hopes of it having the effects he was told it would have - magically cure his overwhelmingly hard to handle anxiety.

Once he got his food, he returned to the department store lot and parked in a far back spot. He has opened the paper bag to dig his food out, grimacing at all the grease and the smell of the cheap meal that wasted no time invading his car. He really isn’t hungry, but he hasn’t eaten all day and he’s aware of the toll the lack of food is taking on his system. He knows better than to work against himself in a moment like this when his mind is already working against him.

Chomping down on a fry, Corpse savors the salt as it hits his tongue and takes a moment to let his shoulders loosen and hang low. Something about the salt and fat seemed to make his body feel better. He tosses his head back slightly as he flicks a few stray strands of hair out of his eyes, reaching into the bag and grabbing another fry.

He’s been content with sitting in his car, eating and trying to quell the anxiety bubbling up under his ribs and in his throat. There’s a sense of peace to it and to the loneliness of it. He doesn’t mind being alone, though. That’s how he prefers to be actually. Dwelling on that thought too long has had the tendency to kill even the smallest spec of a positive energy he possessed in the past so he avoids it for his own peace of mind. The feeling of his heart thundering in his chest to nothing more than his own unconscious is being muffled by the soft rap music coming from the car speakers, him having chosen to pay attention to that instead.

Corpse is so engrossed in his attempts of maintaining this peace that he fails to notice the person approaching his car at a rapid pace. He’s left completely unbothered until one of the backseat doors is yanked open and someone is diving inside, shaking the vehicle. 

“What th-..” He shouts, startled out of the peaceful bubble he had created around himself. 

“Hey, how's it going? Sorry to interrupt your dinner. I'm just avoiding somebody, so don’t mind me!” A slightly out of breath female voice answers from the backseat. But before he could bring himself to turn around and demand this girl get out of his car, fear takes hold of him, closing his throat and drowning his words in the sea of questions and anxiety rising from deep within his chest. 

Ok, breathe. This is weird. There’s a stranger in my car, but she doesn’t appear harmful. Just breathe, stay calm. Fuck, is that a fucking cop car?! 

His shaky hand is barely capable of holding the burger as his wide eyes follow the movements of the vehicle. The patrol car in question slowly drives through each aisle of the parking lot, seemingly searching for something. Or someone. He feels himself unable to blink nor breath as the car creeps closer and closer. He has already broken into a nervous sweat, head spinning with all the possible outcomes - none of which bode well for him.

How am I gonna explain this shit?! There’s no way they’ll believe that she just dove into my car. They’ll think I’m an accomplice. I’ll go to jail. God knows if I’ll get out. I’ll die in there. Oh fuck, I’ll die in there.

He inhales sharply, trying not to hyperventilate, all his muscles tensing before a slap to his arm shook him out of it, “Could you look any more suspicious?! Fuckin’ act cool!”

He nods automatically and looks down at his lap, like he’s trying to find a napkin before taking a quick sip of his tea in attempts to look natural. The liquid promptly went down the wrong pipe, causing him to choke and go in a fit of coughs which he suppressed with his baggy hoodie sleeve. 

The cop passed by, eyeing the man in the car before making a turn to go down another row of parking spots, allowing Corpse to finally peek his gaze upwards to check if the guy was finally gone when the voice in the back seat spoke up again. “Thanks dude, you saved my ass.” 

He hadn’t noticed at first but as he turned to look behind him he saw a bare arm reaching from the back seat, dipping into the paper bag and taking one of his fries. Before he could comprehend it, the girl had climbed up over the center console as the police car pulled out of the parking lot and left. 

Only now is he able to get a real look at the woman who is a potential criminal and went into his car. She isn’t tall but not short either. She’s wearing a pair of jeans that are ripped around her knees and upper thighs and have little occult symbols drawn on them, peace signs and even an occasional tiny dinosaur - the majority, if not all, probably a DIY project of hers by the looks of it. She’s also sporting a sleeveless top with the sides cut open to show most of her waist. Under that, a black sports bra and a tattoo are visible - the tattoo extending from her back to her ribs just slightly. Her dark brown hair is pulled into a loose and rather messy hairdo, every strand going in its own direction as if she couldn’t be bothered by it. Looking down he sees the pair of black combat boots she has on. They look to be well taken care of and loved. A glint of a septum piercing attracts his attention when he notices it reflecting the ugly yellow light of the parking lot street lamps. 

She’s pretty. 

His cheeks flush a little in the darkness as he dumps the remainder of his food back into the bag, noting she was taking another one of his fries before he looked away, swallowing nervously when he feels her gaze on him. 

Before he could speak, however, she had already taken another one of his fries, leaning back in the passenger seat.

“W-why...are you in my car?” His voice showed off his confusion as well as the rising levels of his anxiety, his brow furrowed as he tries to remain cool and calm. 

“Hiding from the police...obviously.” She responds in a ‘duh’ tone as if she were pointing out something very simple and ordinary.

“Bu-...Alright...I guess. You should stop stealing my food though.” He finally mumbles, putting the paper bag into the back seat and catching a brief whiff of the perfume she has on as he turns to do so. 

He’s been alone so long, people have grown to terrify him. Public places terrify him, so it’s no surprise he stays inside for as long as he can. He hasn’t been this close to someone in months. Not since his ex left. She was just...another human being. Another one to leave. Nothing new to him. It shouldn’t have been a surprise nor a disappointment to him but he couldn’t not feel distraught over it for a while after it happened. He couldn’t help but hope she would….nevermind.

She grins - her smile a little spark of light in this lonely little world that is his life. Everyone around him always looked so damn happy. How come he never felt the happiness for himself?

He shifts back into his seat, fingers fiddling with the zipper on his black hoodie, avoiding her gaze as much as possible while still trying to take subtle glances at her. He feels uncomfortably like a teenager at that moment, stumbling his way through a conversation with a girl way too pretty to be talking to him.

“I bet you hear this all the time, but you should do like, audio books or voice acting or somethin’. You’ve got a rad voice to narrate some Steven King or Dean Koontz. Bram Stoker's Dracula would be sick, or some kind of devil or demon character.” She offers, grinning again as she steals another fry despite the bag now being in the back and shifts to reach into her back pocket, the sound of her wallet chain hitting the side of his car door echoes throughout the enclosed space of the car. She pulls out a couple dollars and slaps them onto his dashboard, “anyway, for the fries. Annnd for letting me hide in your car. Don’t go spending it all in one place.” She pushes the door of the Subaru open, winking at him and sliding one leg out. “Thanks for keepin’ the fuzz off of me, see ya Hades!” She jokes teasingly, slapping the roof of his car before closing the door and practically skipping off in the opposite direction of the one the cop went in. 

Corpse parts his lips, blinking slowly before looking at the department store and back towards the slowly shrinking figure of the girl. His head is spinning again, for different reasons now.

“What the hell just happened....?” He pauses for a lingering second before his voice turns sharp and a distressed look crosses his face, “Fuck, what did I need from the store?!”

[starlightshore]

Is there any evidence that Chara is an abuse victim? It's a very popular headcanon and I want to understand why

hrm. ok let me preface this with a couple of things: one, i actually answered this same question a couple weeks ago (week ago? time means nothing to me) on AFR but i got triggered by continuous use of the topic and people wouldn’t stop talking after i asked multiple times for us to stop. (no bad blood to anyone involved) this is only relevant because its the same question, and I want to make it clear I am fine with talking about this topic, and I will say if or when it’s stressing me out. I am not against talking about dark themes, and at the moment I am calm and fine.

I want everyone to know that this is a triggering topic and i specifically am susceptible to this and it’s surrounding themes, so please try to read the room I’m creating on this topic and give me the proper space.

i say that all ahead of time because I do not want to get triggered or talk about child abuse/death/suicide at length. this ask is fine. maybe a couple more if it’s brief and not asking me to do further research.

secondly, I want to talk about UT canon real quick. UT, for the most part, relies on text to spell out it’s history and world. characters don’t walk on screen and say: I’m Chara Dreemurr. I was born on September 15th 2003. I’m nonbinary and use they/them.” like no, characters live in the moment and yes their past define them, but they got bigger things to worry about and talk about current things. maybe they’ll refer to past things, but never bluntly.

--putting under read more. discussion of child abuse, self harm, and other ingame dark topics. This is mainly a character analysis

So, either you infer from what’s available or you search the wiki/playthrough/text dumps. The very act of playing no mercy route has lore in itself, if you account for player theory and other factors I’m not getting into here. Anyway, Undertale is a very Deep and loaded game with lots of world building built into every nook and cranny. (just spend 5 minutes on semi-frequent undertale facts if you’re curious to this rabbit hole)

Anyway point being, Chara is the narrator. this is fact. “it’s me, Chara.” They outright say it. I hate when people call it theory when it’s more explicit than most things in game.

anyway, the main flavor text i want to point to is this:

* "Faded Ribbon" - Armor DF 3 * If you're cuter, monsters  won't hit you as hard. 

So here’s a couple things I want to talk about first. Yes, monsters fight and that is normal.

* But they will never know  the joy of expressing  themselves through magic.* They'll never get a bullet-   pattern birthday card... 

It’s 10000% likely that Chara dealt with monster fights when alive. And that most likely lead to culture shock and confusion, but with Toriel (lmao, she outright scares off a froggit from Frisk) by their side and being a royal, I highly doubt they were in any danger in that household.

point being, yes, monsters could of hurt them, I would think this mindset is more directed to humanity, rather than monsterkind. You can read it more bluntly that it’s about monsters after all, t does specify monsters here. My counter point is that is to foreshadow how monsters are weaker beings who are more in-tuned with their magic-based bodies and are susceptible to intent, and likewise their magic reflects their own intent.

So yeah, I think it reflects to Chara’s general history and mindset to wanting to appear more tolerable to avoid pain, be it physical abuse or fear of being human. Chara, who calls themself a demon and hated humanity passionately, would be fully aware they are human. When welcomed to a very loving monster family, they didn’t want to ruin the prophetic angelic image they placed on them. They knew with their own imperfect behavior, that they were doomed to fail them.

This can be inferred from how both Toriel and Asgore wear the deltarune (Toriel’s robes, Asgore’s armor makes the wings and their homes in both games have the symbol). Gerson talks about how either the Deltarune Angel (someone who has seen the surface and returned) would either free them or destroy them all. Chara, who the underground believed to be that Angel, was put on this huge pedestal that clearly both parent’s believed in.

We know Toriel represents Integrity,

* someone who sincerely  likes bad jokes...* has an integrity  you can't say  "no" to. 

(along with being refereed to in the blue color of text)

and by both (points in DR’s direction) and this line from her when allowing Frisk to go past the ruins:

My expectations... My loneliness... My fear...For you, my child... I will put them aside.

Toriel says expectations first. It’s clearly a huge part of her motivation. I absolutely see how this pressure not only was put on Chara, but Asriel as well. This isn’t a hate letter to Toriel btw, but rather an examination of her parenting that led to the main tragedy of the game. It’s a cautionary tale. Toriel was not prepared for adopting a suicidal preteen.

speaking of which! back to the whole point of this post.

* I know why (Chara) climbed the mountain.

*(Chara) hated humanity.* Why they did, they  never talked about  it.* But they felt very strongly about  that.

 Now I want to say that Chara hating humanity enough to run away to kill themself doesn’t strictly mean they were abused, but wow! Chara is seriously mentally ill (and frankly, yes, children can be are suicidal) and I don’t think that level of suffering happens for no reason.

* The ends of the tools have  been filed down to  make them safer.* Seems like gardening tools.

* Where are the knives.

The gardening tools in Toriel’s home are dulled and there are no knives in the kitchen. These are actions one takes when their child self harms, this isn’t precautions based in them being literal infants. Chara I imagine was closer to 10/12 age range than Baby. (what baby knows what a tsundere is?)

All these paint a picture of a child who self harms, who violently hates humanity and wanted to kill their (likely) abusers. I’ve also seen someone suggest the fact that FIGHT is your first option in the game in itself reflects how Chara’s first instinct is to Fight first. Both Frisk and Chara are heavily influenced by the player’s actions (both literal and in a parental/guardian like influence) and we see this thru Chara’s outlook changes depending on LV, as well how Frisk feels about violence. (dogfood bag being half full/empty, punching mad dummy in the dump)

Using the themes of the game and backstory/context, we can see how Chara has been taught violence as a viable option. I’d link that more to their pre-underground as Monsterkind as a society preaches mercy and uses bullets not as a murderous tool, but as self expression.

Again, I don’t want to say that just because a child is mentally ill and self harms, doesn’t mean they were abused but I don’t think it’s out of line as a reasoning for it. Yes, sometimes you’re just born with such mental illness, but I choose to interpret the faded ribbon dialogue + their own desire to fight/kill as something taught by example. It fits the themes. It’s more realistic to see Chara as someone who’s been hurt and has learned to hurt in return. (AND that does not mean abuse victims are therefore doomed to become abusers! chara is a child first and thru the pacifist route they’re just as merciful as Frisk! It’s a character arc)

and just to be absolutely clear because I KNOW how tumblr handles nuance sometimes, I am speaking as a former abused and suicidal child. Making that clear that when I say this is how I read the text, it’s not just me speculating on the game’s content but on a real life knowledge of how this shit works. Chara very, very much reads an abused and depressed child who just wanted to fulfill the prophecy for the sake of their family’s freedom.

With almost killing Asgore on accident, Chara realizes that they are an evil human and the only way to free their people is to die violently. (don’t look up buttercup poisoning side effects, it’s bad.) Chara didn’t need to die to escape. They could of killed any of the dreemurrs, but they chose to die horrifically. It’s common for those who are suicidal that they’ll want to die before people see them in a negative light.

also couldn’t really fit this earlier but hell, this is long anyway so I might as well say this here. I think we can also infer Chara’s hatred for humanity grew with learning the history of monsterkind. The books harshly say human souls are different and it’s possible they may not even naturally have compassion and love, or at least, are not required to have it. Humans sealed monsters underground and commited actual genocide against them. (and i don’t use that word lightly. the no mercy route isn’t a genocide, please don’t use that term for that. esp don’t lighten such a heavy and real-word term to a frickin video game route oh my god)

We have this repeating theme of society’s influence on children and how cycles of pain continue. What is “in this world, it’s kill-or-be-killed“ but a statement on society? I’ve discussed before that I think it’s very likely Chara said those words to Asriel as they were being murdered, and how the very system that put Chara into this path was human society that both failed Chara and monsterkind all those years ago. The game’s message is that you must not kill, and you must not be killed in return. That there is a third option, and that even in dire circumstances if you use 7 virtues and are determined enough, you can avoid war and make peace. This isn’t to say self defense is bad, Undyne the Undyning is framed as a hero, and cruel/corrupt rulers should be disposed of (king spade)

this got a little off topic but I thought it was fun to write about. The game’s main theme is built around that phrase, it’s Asriel’s character arc of him learning thru Frisk/Chara/Player that in this world, despite everything, you don’t have to kill or be killed.

TLDR; Chara is implied to hate humanity so strongly they were willing to die horrifically to free monsterkind and fulfill the angel’s prophecy. the game depicts them as a very mentally ill child and with the addition of the faded ribbon text + desire to FIGHT, Chara likely learned this mindset before falling underground. looking at the themes of the game and chara’s backstory, we can infer and take a guess at who they were and what the game is trying to say. Undertale is a good game and has a good moral. That’s my TedTalk

[yourkimjaejin]

Moxy with the NCT 127

The long awaited post for me!!!! Here is a closer look at Moxy’s relationships with the members of 127. Enjoy!!! ~ Author Izzy

Moxy x Taeil

Taeil was always nice Moxy. Treating her kindness and respect but never getting to close. Anytime he wanted to, it seemed like Johnny and Doyoung had everything under control

So Taeil decided to be her silent support. During her first two promotions with 127, Taeil would always keep a close eye on her. Eventually, he began to be able to tell when Moxy needed someone. And when she did he was there. 

Taeil became her emotional support oppa. Whenever she needed quiet cuddle time, she went to him. Mainly because he never told anyone. The real reason: Haechan was right. Taeil is a perfect cuddle buddy. 

As she got more comfortable with her position within 127, Moxy visited Taeil a little less but she knew that her oppa’s arms were open for her always

These two constantly trade edm songs with each other. When the rest of the members are out, they’ll blast music and have their own party in the dorms. 

He knows Moxy doesn’t like chocolate so if he makes a dessert with chocolate in it, he’ll make a special one for her with white chocolate

Moxy x Johnny

Johnny is Moxy’s dad. No ifs, ands or buts. He is her father.

With Moxy having her own room, Johnny makes a habit out of coming in and checking on her. He also drags her out to get sunlight every couple of days.

Johnny: You will not sit here and become a vampire. Let’s go!

Moxy: But I’m allergic to sun..

When Johnny was doing NCT Night Night, Moxy came to watch in studio. Usually falling asleep to Johnny and Jaehyun’s voices

Whenever he buys her clothes, he refuses to buy her any black clothing. Claiming she need to expand her color palette

Johnny has a job a Moxy’s Bodyguard #1. He sits or stands one place down from her to keep an eye on her. In airports, she remains in his eyesight's at all times. 

Moxy x Taeyong

For some time, Taeyong and Moxy didn’t have a relationship. She didn’t get to know him. He didn’t get to know her. In an effort to take care of the other (at the time) nine members, Moxy just flew under the radar.

After an interview gone wrong, Taeyong made the decision to pay more attention to the younger girl

Taeyong was impressed by her talent, all aspects of it. So he began to help with her rapping and dancing. 

Taeyong was the first member to notice her non-eating habits. To rectify that, he started keeping small snacks he knew she liked with him

Taeyong loves to run his fingers thru her hair. During vlives, he’ll pull her in front of him and start twisting and tangling her hair

These two are always bouncing ideas off of each other. Moxy’s very in touch with her feelings she knows exactly what she needs to do to express those feelings in a song and that really helps Taeyong when he gets stuck with lyrics. 

Moxy x Yuta 

Yuta is the second member of the silent supporters. Yuta keeps Moxy safe using his body. If the group is walking thru a crown, Yuta keeps Moxy in his sights at all times. If they’re on a sidewalk, Yuta makes sure she walks on the inside even if she’s not walking with him

These two love to watch anime together. As of right now, they are in the midst of a Fairy Tail rewatch. Whenever they have time, they catch a couple episodes

He is the only person Moxy could do no wrong with. The only hyung who will let Moxy do what she wants. If Moxy sneaks out to get some fries, Yuta causes the distraction

Yuta always encourages Moxy to dress in more girly clothing. He knows how much she enjoys it but never feels confident enough to wear it. So he’s tries to help her overcome that

Moxy x Doyoung

(I love this gif!!)

If Johnny is the dad, Doyoung is the mom. 

He looks after her all the time. Doyoung was always scolding both her and the other members for not really getting to know each other. 

Doyoung helped her a lot to break out of her shell. He even accompanied her to practice her gymnastics in Korea for the first time

Doyoung found out about Moxy’s terrible eating habits in the worst way possible. From then on, he made it his personal mission to make sure she eats

During Doyoung and Moxy’s early time with NCT, Moxy would have a hard time sleeping so Doyoung left his door open to her. Most of the time, She ended up in his room before morning

Doyoung does not like for Moxy to show a lot of skin around other male idols outside of NCT. There are plenty of clips where Doyoung will cover Moxy’s legs and shoulders with the closest blanket or jacket

If Doyoung is having trouble with dance moves, he’ll pull her aside for help 

Moxy x Jaehyun

Jaehyun is the third silent supporter Moxy has. Fans can catch him fixing her clothes, moving her hair into the correct place and softly catching her attention to check on her. 

Moxy has a tendency to space out. During those moments, Jaehyun usually grabs her hand and rubs his thumb on the top of her hand in small circle until she snaps out of it

Jaehyun always guides her off stage. He’s a tensy bit scared of her walking in heels and possibly slipping and falling

Moxy likes singing with Jaehyun. Around the dorm, the two will start singing and (without talking) harmonizing

Moxy x Jungwoo

Jungwoo and Moxy were close from the get-go. Moxy helped Jungwoo find his place within 127 and he’s always thankful to her. The other members of 127 are just a bit jealous of how close the two became in such a short time

Moxy and Jungwoo flirt.....alot! There is literally no boundaries between them. When Moxy lived in the 127 dorm she would steal his clothes all the time. 

When on stage, they might as well be attached at the hip. Fans will see them gravitating towards each other like magnets. At fansigns, Jungwoo will tell the fans to checkup on his girl two spaces down

Jungwoo is the only person who will ever see Moxy freak over other kpop groups. She would rather appear indifferent to everyone else. Jungwoo was only other member to figure out Moxy had a crush on Mark from Got7

Moxy x Mark

M squared didn’t have any sort of relationship until recently. For most of their shared career, they were just members in the same band. 

Early on, K-fans made many comparisons between the two 99 liners. Both were from countries outside of Korea. Both were exceptional at rap, dance and singing. In most title tracks, you can bet Mark and Moxy are gonna have a rap verse where they go line for line

Many fans called Moxy a mixture of Taeyong and Mark. Those comments got to him. And because Mark didn’t talk to her, she didn’t talk to him. This all came to a head when SuperM was just starting. 

Mark should have been happy. Happy to have his raps all to himself. But he found himself missing Moxy’s energy. Her hype affected him so much stage. It made go even harder with every word. 

When Mark finally got back for Superhuman promotions, Mark finally started to make a effort to befriend Moxy. While the two are getting closer, Mark is still at the bottom of her relationships within 127

Moxy x Haechan

Different from Mark, Haechan and Moxy grew close fast. At first, he saw her like Haechan see’s Taeil. The quiet member who just the right person to break them out of their shell. And that he did

Haechan would always crash into her room like a hurricane, kick everyone out and steal Moxy for the rest of the day

They love learning old and new kpop dances together. These two are a walking random play dance challenge.

During the summer fight, Donghyuck would stow away in Moxy’s room. The hyungs wouldn’t hear any noise coming so they would check on them almost every thirty minutes just to make sure the two were ok.

Moxy is one of the only members who is privy to Donghyuck in a down mood. “You never have to front with me. You got me?”

Moxy and NCT Dream

Moxy is their noona and don’t you forget it. 

Moxy adores Renjun’s energy. His aura never fails to make her feel safe and calm. Moxy and Renjun have little dates where they just sit in his room and watch YouTube theory videos

Jeno likes to workout with Moxy but she will only join if he’s going to a gym. Moxy refuses to ride bikes across half of Korea

Just like Johnny does with Moxy, she drags Jaemin out of his room for some outside time whenever its been awhile since they’ve seen the sun

Every third Thursday of the month, mochenji get together at chenle’s house and have a sleepover. Private time between the maknae’s and their favorite noona

Moxy and WayV

Hendery, Xiaojun and Yangyang love to tease Moxy about her bias on Ten. They flood her text message with pictures of him. They make little comments that make her blush in front of him.

Ten thinks its Moxy’s crush is adorable. He found out a while ago (I mean Moxy isn’t subtle.....). The only person Ten told was Kun. Ten loves to buy things for her just to see her eyes light up

You can’t put Moxy in the same room as Lucas cause she will literally pass out from laughing too much

Back in their trainee days, Kun would accompany Moxy to the train station to get home. One time, it was really late and Kun walked her all the way home. Kun became her grandmother favorite NCT member that day. 

Winwin and Moxy found common ground in the tricking Winwin did (i.e. the front flip in fire truck) Winwin loved going to her gymnastics practice and practicing flips with her. 

Moxy and NCT U

Shotaro is her shy Japanese child and if anything hurts him, Moxy would burn Korea to the ground. 

Other SM trainees tried to scare him by warning him about Moxy’s “Bad Attitude”. Telling him that he would never get her help or advice. Shotaro not knowing any better steered clear. 

One day, Moxy found him struggling with his Korean lessons and She immediately sat down with and helps him. Breaking everything down slowly. She even called Yuta to help because she only knew a tiny bit of Japanese. Ever since, Moxy has protected Shotaro. 

Sungchan loves to flirt with his Noona but all he gets in return is a swat on the arm. Truly, Sungchan loves being around Moxy. She took the time to introduce him to the other members and let him cling to her while he was getting used to being thrown into such a well known group

Moxy loves to take care of Sungchan and Shotaro. She’ll buy them food and The members of 12 were shocked to see how easy it was for the new members to drag Moxy out of the house

[optimistic-dinosaur-nacho]

Taken

Curtis Everett x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Violence, Language Summary: You’ve been living on the train for as long as you could remember along with your brother. The front section can really mess up you in the tail section.

A/N: Excuse the mistakes that appear in this fic, this fic is HELLA old so please bear with me, this is an old fic and so I didn’t know where my mind was going lol

You were just getting ready to head to sleep, seeing Curtis who people call their leader. Ignoring that he was there, you were slowly getting ready to climb up to your bed. "Hey, Nicholas." You heard Curtis speak to your little brother. You turn around and saw Curtis look up at you. "Y/N."

"Curtis." You say, helping Nicholas up on the bed. Curtis let out a small sigh, "Look Y/N, I'm sorry about Edgar-"

"Don't apologize. Edgar should be the one to apologize, I don't eat anyways so what's the point of arguing that he stolen food from me?" You shrugged, slowly began to get Nicholas in bed. "You starving yourself isn't gonna get us out of here," He says.

"It'll get me out of this damn train. I don't want to wake up everyday with all of us bruised and bloodied. My parents died to protect me. Now I'm doing the same for my brother. What's it been, Curtis? 17 fucking years on this goddamn crazy train." You said. You slowly climbed up and dragged the small old curtain to cover the bright light over your guys' bed.

.

"Y/N. Y/N, wake up." You opened your eyes slowly to see Nicholas shaking you. "They're calling us." You quickly sat up, hearing men yelling and Curtis pulled the curtain back. "Come on." He helps Nicholas down and then you jumped down. Everyone lined up where they were supposed to be. "This is pathetic..." You muttered, Curtis looks over to you. "Just do what the say, it's not hard," He says, keeping his eyes forward. You heard the guard talk, men holding guns behind him, even the doors behind were opening slowly but closing afterwards. "Row one." His clicks on the button in hand. The front row sits down. "Two." The next one does the same.

"Three."

"Four."

"Five," Your row sits down but you only stood up, Curtis noticed you didn't sit. "Y/N-"

"Ma'am, sit down." The guard calls, you just stood there. "Sit down!" The man behind him pulls his gun up. "Y/N, sit down!" Curtis says harshly, one of the guards behind begins to walk up with a baton. Curtis stood up, holding your arm. "I got her! I got her! She's just... tired. Not functioning right at this moment." Curtis puts his hand up to keep them from aiming their guns at her. "Well, get her functioning. Next time we won't hesitate." The guard snaps, Curtis finally pulls you down onto your knees.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" He asked, you just looked forward not bothering to look at him. Curtis slips his hand into yours and that finally made you glance at him. "Don't ever do that again." He asked. Edgar looked over at you two. "That wasn't the plan was it?" Edgar asked, Curtis shook his head.

.

It's been a few hours, you and your brother were exhausted, you never ate the bars that they made. It concerned Curtis, you weren't skinny but you weren't caught eating either. It was either you give your bars to Edgar, Nicholas, or Curtis. You were holding Nicholas on the bed you two shared, your hand brushing in his brown curly hair. "I'm scared," Nicholas says, you pulled him into your chest, "I know... I'll keep you safe." You heard people were called out for the worse part for your little brother. Every kid would be lined up and some will be chosen for something you couldn't know.

But they would never return, it scared the both of you. You were older than him, he was just 5 and you were 20 years older than him. You both slightly gasped when you saw Curtis who looked at you, "Come on-"

"No," You said, holding your brother close, "They'll take him." Curtis held out his hand, "You have to come. Or they'll hurt you both." For some reason you nodded, Curtis helped your brother down from your top bunk. Curtis gently held your waist as he helped you down. His hand placed on your back as he helped you guys gather around. Kids were put up ahead, you slowly hid Nicholas behind you. "Y/N-"

"Shut up." You grit your teeth, Curtis knew they could hurt you if you didn't give up your brother. But you loved him. You saw one of the men look up, seeing the unusual look on your face, keeping your eyes low. The lady with the yellow jacket walks up to you, seeing your hand drawn to your back. She lunged forward and grabbed your brother. You instantly shoved her away from him but she had a good grip on him, "No! Let him go!" You screamed, trying to grab your brother's hand, or rip her hands off his arm.

One of the others kid was taken and they tried to fight back and get their kid. You cried, pushing passed the people to grab your brother but Curtis came behind and held you. "No! Let go of me! Nicholas! Nicholas!" After they were done measuring him, she took him and the other kid through the doors. "Nicholas!" You screamed, a guard came up and slammed his gun stock into your head and you stumbled to the ground.

Your eyes slowly opened, hearing chatter and small cries. Your eyes went to the side to see people pass by. You slowly sat up but the pain immediately caused you to fall back. The curtain was drawn back and you saw Curtis. "Hey," He says, you slowly drew your eyes back to the ceiling.

He lifted the cloth off your forehead and sighs, "You should stay down for a bit. They hit you pretty hard-"

"I want Nicholas-"

"We can't do anything," He says, "Not now we can't."

You grit your teeth, "You let them do it. You let them take him."

"They would've killed both of us." He says, you shake your head, "When you die, you're free. We're all animals on this train that takes us nowhere. I don't care if I die." Curtis reached over to gently place on your shoulder. "I'm sorry... Tanya lost her son. We're all gonna find them and we'll return them back safely."

"It's over, Curtis. For me." You felt a tear slip down your cheek. "We can't get him back. I don't know what they'll do with him." You winced when you sat up. Curtis trying to help you lay down, "Y/N, you need to lay down-"

"No! I want Nicholas! Those bastards took him. He's everything to me!"

"You're everything to me to! I don't want you to die on this train."

"Everyone dies on this train. He's my brother! He's my Nicholas-" Curtis jumps up and pulls you into his chest, "I know. I know..." Softly, he said. You felt his fingers slowly brush your hair, your sobs muffled in his coat. You clamped his coat in your hands, crying into his chest. "I love him. Now I lost him and I can't get him back-"

"I promise you. I will get him back," Curtis kept you in his embrace, speaking softly to keep your sobs quiet and calm. You slowly calmed down, tears that were dragged down your cheeks. It could have filled a glass of water just on how much you cried. Your head pounding painfully bad, Curtis slowly pulls away, "You should rest." He began to move off but you stopped him. "No. Don't," Your bottom lip quivered, "Stay with me."

He slowly exhales and laid down next to you, you both faced each other, your arm draping over him to stay close to him as possible. He was warm, and to be honest you were freezing, the blankets you guys had were useless. You let out a shaky breath, "I love you, Curtis..." You felt his arm drape over your frame and pulled you in closer.

"I love you, too."

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[vanchlo]

The Partner / Chapter Seven, "The Recovery"

Word Count: 7.6k words /  Story Masterlist /  Read The Assistant /  Read on Wattpad / Song: Bloom by The Paper Kites (click to listen)

P.S. Please ignore any weird formatting stupid Tumblr did to the chapter. I just copy and paste from Google Docs and for some reason, Tumblr doesn’t like it. Sigh. 

"He touched her face gently with the back of his hand. 'You disappear so completely into your head sometimes,' he said. 'I wish I could follow you.' 'You do,' she wanted to say. 'You live in my head all of the time.”

- Jace and Clary, City of Ashes

“Ree, you need to eat something.” 

I had heard it again and again, and still, I was ignoring it. For better or for worse. It comes again, and another time as the bleep of the car locking behind us sounds. 

“You know what he’s going to say,” she continues. Of course, I do, it’s going to be if I’ve eaten breakfast, but he’s not himself right now. Yet, he’s still there, deep down. So is the way I don’t want to disappoint him, or our baby. 

“Fine, give me the damned granola bar then,” I relent, swiping the object from her hand and tearing it open. Luckily, my stomach doesn’t roil at the sight of it or the taste, and I chew hungrily. 

“I’ll just be out here then- well, in the waiting room, but not the same one, of course.” 

“Yeah,” I mumble absently, listening to her departing footfall. They echo in my ears amongst the busy sounds of the hospital floor, the Surgical Intensive Care Unit, or something like that. Only a minute off the lift and I couldn’t remember. 

The tips of my ears still felt numb with cold, another sensation nudging against the hammering of my heart in my chest. It grew faster and louder when I reached his door, the number still burned into my memory. This time, I don’t linger, walking right into the sounds and sights I didn’t miss. But there’s the man lying in the hospital bed I ached and longed for all night and this morning as I moved around our house without him. Thought about our baby without him, and saw the memory of him proposing on the balcony by myself. 

My heart slows its ticking and swells when I find his face, only to have it squeeze at the remembrance of the stitches and colors interrupting his beautiful skin. A pallor still clings to him and within moments, my lips are singing from kissing his warm forehead. Soft breaths escape his lips and sitting down in the chair beside him, my heart falls at his absence. There hadn’t been a second since the last time I was here that my thoughts didn’t overrun with missing him, wanting him. It’s unsuccessful when I attempt to nudge the disappointment away, trying to tell myself that he needs the sleep, no matter how much I want to see those eyes open and be warmed by his sunshine smile. 

It’s a few episodes of some Gordon Ramsay show on the telly before my eyes lull shut, awakened sometime later by something stroking my palm. Yawning, I open my eyes regrettably, that is until I see the tired pair looking at me. Searching for me, just like I do with him. 

“Becks . . yer back.” 

“Harry,” it’s a rushed sigh, and so are my movements that bring me to hug him. 

“Mmm, careful, bug.” 

“I’m sorry,” I apologize, pulling away to look at his glassy eyes through my wide-awake ones. 

“‘s okay, c’mere,” he almost smiles, surprising me with the strength he uses to pull on my arm until I’m back in his. “Missed you.” 

“I missed you more.” 

“You sleep okay?” he murmurs against my hair, lips sponging a kiss to my temple. 

My lips part with the buzzing excitement I feel to get to talk to him, feeling as if I missed him all over again sitting in that chair. They fall with a doubt, and I’m grabbing for words, not knowing what to say. 

“Fine,” is what I decide on, albeit the fact it’s a lie, but his comfort is more important. The last thing I want to do is worry him, and I try not to think about if that’s what he would want, because once I start I know it’d be a slippery slope. 

“Happy t’ hear.” 

“How about you?” I wonder aloud, stroking my fingers through his hair, unable to ignore the way strands are caked together with blood. The sleep had left my body at once, and suddenly, all I wanted to do was to take care of him. Bathe him. Feed him. Make him all better. 

“Alright . . didn’t wake up as much . . How’s baby?”

“Good. I didn’t get sick this morning.” 

The happiness is clear as day in his little wheeze, and the words that follow, “Makes me so happy . . Don’t like seein’ you sick.” 

I have to blink hard and long to push them away when I hear those words, knowing that not an ounce more of truth could stick to them in my head. I don’t like seeing you sick either, but that doesn’t even begin to cover it. It passes, but I don’t know for how much longer. I have shed how many tears now, how can there be any left? Then, I remind myself that I had thought we’d climbed the mountain and gotten to the other side, but no, it still felt as if we were on the peak, unable to know how to find flat ground again. 

“Skye told me . . ,” they’re out and unable to be dragged back in. Neither am I after he coaxed me into bed beside him, his neck warm against my forehead. 

“Told you what?” he murmurs, a raggedness still abrasive in his wonderful voice. My lips still, not knowing how to say it, but that’s not it, as I lace my hand with his. Imagining a gold band on his ring finger, or whatever material Mr. Creative would come up with, surely with diamonds inlaid and all. He’d said silver one day and then gold the next, so it beats me what he’ll end up picking. 

“About giving you my letter.” 

His eyebrows squishing together still was as adorable as could be, despite the way it’s slower and so is his blink. It pains me each second the cogs slowly spin behind his eyes until the wrinkle between them smooths. 

“Ya, I remember now,” Harry admits, lips spreading into a smile that imbues me with light. “Ya didn’t know?”

“No, she didn’t tell me until the night . . of your accident and . . “

“What, bug?” he hums, sending goosebumps down my arm when his thumb begins to draw circles against my knuckle. 

The words are there and I know how to say them, but they refuse to line up nicely. No, they won’t gather on the tracks that guide to my lips, because I know how they’ll sound. Silly as can be. I know the way they’ll make him feel, and with the rock in my gut, I think that’s what I fear most of all. The last thing I’ve ever wanted to do was to hurt Harry, and those words couldn’t ring truer as I lie in the hospital bed beside him. 

“Becks? What ‘s it?” his question comes in a hushed whisper, one marked by a sigh when a wetness meets my cheek. 

“I told Skye th-that-,” I stop and he waits, patient as ever before, perhaps even more so. “I was afraid you didn’t know how much I loved you a-and how badly I wanted a family with you-.” I can’t get any further before my voice is entirely swimming with the dryness of tears, and the subsequent sob. 

“Buggie,” Harry huffs with a voice likened to mine, struggling for breath and a reprieve from the pain. I find my relief in him when he presses me against his front, and already, I’m tired of being careful. I wish things didn’t have to be this way, and that it could come true just that easily. “Ya never need t’ worry . . I know, always have.” 

“B-But what I said-.” 

“It don’t matter . . know ya love me so much. Know you’ve always had tha biggest crush on me,” at that, I think I hear the smallest of titters grace his lips. With it, one almost leaves mine at seeing that slice of him. “Had tha biggest one on you since ‘bout day one . . don’t worry . . I know.” 

“Thank you,” it’s a whisper that I’m sure he hears. A quiet sigh makes its way out when I feel his lips against my wet eyes, once and then twice. “Did it surprise you at all, the letter?”

“Sure did,” he rasps with a slight nod, taking care to rid my cheeks of the tears riddling them. “‘s ‘bout tha sweetest thing ‘ve ever read . . . saddest too . . and flatterin.’” 

“And you kept it?”

“‘Course . . How’d y’know?” he asks with his eyebrows, like always. His expressions lack originality though, because they just won’t move that way. They’re likened to a dough that’s too tough and won’t mold how you’d like it to, but once it has a good rest, it’s ready to. 

“Skye said she saw it in your wallet the other day, it looked like you’d read it a few dozen times.” 

The faintest of light shines in his eyes before the slightest of nods comes, “Sure did . . Befo’ I proposed . . When we broke up . . While you were in hospital still . . I couldn’t lose that, but . . ‘s one o’ tha hardest things . . ‘ve read. Cried loads tha first time and afta that . . . hearin’ all tha pain ya went thru’ ‘cos o’ me.” 

“Harry-,” I begin, urgency on my tongue. 

“Doesn’t matter now,” he shushes with a finger to my lips, hand still laced with mine. His blinks are growing longer and eyes glossier, I can already tell his cues. 

“I’ve made you tired again, you should rest.” 

His lips are lazy in their smile, but beautiful as can be. They’d benefitted from the lip balm I’d found in my purse, or what Harry called ‘lathering that crap on his lips,’ which I admittedly probably overdid. Now, at last, they were supple and him, again. 

“Hate t’ agree, but I am . . wanna stay with you, but . . need sleep.” 

“I’ll be here when you wake up.” 

“Good,” he grins, pressing his lips to mine before I slide out from under the covers. The faint dimple in his cheek melts away as the covers reach his shoulders, a calmness draping over him. 

I sit there at first for just a moment, one that slowly turns into a few, and then many more, just watching him. He stirs at first to get comfortable until a sigh drops from his lips. The tense space between his eyebrows relaxes as the rest of him does, and for a second, I think that I couldn’t be happier. That is until every reason that I have to not be happy comes rushing back to me. Until I tell myself that’s not true, because for the longest of time, all I had wanted- needed to be happy was to get to love him, and to have him love me back. Something I had spent so many tears and time on, and now, it was mine. The weight on my left-hand tells me so, first with the knot ring secure on my middle finger, and the handed-down coils of gold and diamonds to its left. A calm settles over me when my hand comes to lie on my stomach, and my lips turn up into my cheeks as I watch the first snores leave his lips. 

Harry. 

My Harry. 

My Sunshine, because we’ve been through thick and thin, and I know that he’d always be that for me. A light in the darkness. He hadn’t failed to be one, yet. 

The skin above his brows is silky as a ribbon and saved from the ruin of the bruises and the like that clung to him in other places. It was hard to decide whether or not he was looking like himself again. As the bruises deepened, this swelled and that went down, and as his stubble grew, it was hard to find him in there, but I did. 

A scuffle met my ears, lifting my head up and around. Freezing in my shoes, everything stills as I stare ahead, my fingers in Harry’s hair. Across from me , their lips wobble and still, parting just a second later, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-.” 

I automatically stop him with a terse shake of my head, already recognizing his cues of worry blur in front of me. They shake with more uncertain words as he holds up the vase of yellow daffodils. 

“I hope he likes flowers,” he insists with a shrug of his shoulders, but I can tell there’s more. First, by the way his Adam's apple bobs, and then the way his eyes the same color as mine grow wet. “I’m so sorry, Ree,” Robbie sighs in a choked voice. I never knew how much I had needed a hug from my brother until my arms were around him. 

“Thank you,” it’s a whisper regretful of words I don’t know how to say. 

“‘Course, Ree. God, when Dad told me-,” this time he cuts himself off, but we’re both shaking our heads when he pulls away. He’s chalk full of surprises, starting with his appearance and what I see in his eyes. It may not be the same, but there’s a reflection of the misery that wrenches my insides. 

“It’s okay- well, it’s not, not what happened, but . . .” 

His usually shaggy locks barely move as his head shakes quickly, covered by a maroon beanie. 

“I had this feeling something was up with you, and I tried to call but I didn’t get an answer. I was worried, but then Dad came by to stay and told me.” 

“I haven’t been answering my phone much, sorry,” it’s unremarkable, the sound of my voice and how I try to hide everything sitting inside of it. It’s for nothing when I look over my shoulder, assured Harry’s still sleeping. 

“Shutup, you have nothing to be sorry about,” Robbie tuts, growing quiet. Without looking, I know that his eyes are on me, and on Harry. “How is he?”

“Okay, now . . But it’s still an uphill battle. Concussion, managing pain, therapy, being bloody shot twice . . Everybody is so happy and I just- I don’t understand- of course, I am th-that he’s still here, but-.” 

“It’s okay to feel that way, Ree, whatever way,” he says, not interrupting. A dryness swallows any words in my throat. His hand on my arm startles me, pausing the way I wring my own, but probably for the better. “Maybe it’s because people don’t know. They don’t have to be here every second, knowing how it really is. I don’t mean that-.” 

“I know you don’t mean it that way, Robbie. He’d never be a burden, but it can be s-so hard,” it comes out in a stammer, lips wobbling as Harry’s breaths grow in volume with my proximity. “I’d never wish this upon anybody, t-to go through what Harry did when I had . . my accident- for him to get hurt like this. H-How could somebody do that to another person, Bee?” he smells like the indescribable scent of tears. No, not like the real vanilla extract my grandma would use when we baked, or those woodsy candles I’d see at the shops. Harry’s breaths remain even and slow, despite my lips pressing to his cheek, painting his skin with my tepid tears. The anger burns behind my eyes, filling my being like it has whenever that thought invades my mind, until it melts away unspent. “M-My person.” 

“Ree . . I wish I knew.” 

“Me too,” the whisper rebounds off of Harry’s still lips. I’m only reminded of the way my own taste metallic against the vice of my teeth. “We s-should let him sleep.” 

I barely hear his hummed reply, watching how Harry’s eyelashes flutter against his skin. His color was starting to come back, but it was slow, and I think I was the only one who’d noticed. Was it because I wished it so badly, or because it was the truth? I wouldn’t put it past me to see things that weren’t there, because I wanted so badly for him to be better- no, if I was being honest, I wanted this all to be over. But as I combed his hair back with a feather of a touch before leaving him, I wasn’t sure of the next time I’d ever feel okay again. 

“Ree,” the voice begins behind me, but I’m already turning around. They were the arms I ran to when I was hurt, the pair I pushed away after a fight, and the ones that were always there. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t there.”

“It’s okay. You didn’t know.”

“Still, I should’ve. I’m sorry.”

Hiccuping, words seem like an impossibility whilst it ravages my body again. The ‘it’ that is never that far away, always ready to strike when I think I’m starting to feel put together again. 

“Stop apologizing,” I barely manage, surprised that I allow him to lead me from the room. Out in the hall, he spots a familiar head of rainbow hair, just seconds before I do. 

“Heya, Bee. I didn’t see you come in,” Skye announces in a hushed whisper, sharing a hug. My eyes wander over their shoulders and to Harry. “I can keep an eye on him, if you want.”

I get by with a nod, savoring one last glance of his matted curls and peaceful face before following Robbie down the hall. 

“If something happens, text me. Okay?” I manage at the last second, turning around, making her do the same. 

“Nothing will, Ree, but sure thing.” 

A shiver courses through me as I turn back around, pulling my hands back into the sleeves of this jumper, one of Harry’s. The line between our clothes had bled into the other long ago, and it was hard to remember whose jumper or shirt was whose anymore. He notices, rubbing circles into my back as an almost awkward silence settles around us. 

“I’d ask how you’re holding up, but-.”

“Not good,” it’s a frog-like croak, making me wish for water. His nod can be seen from the corner of my eye, passing nurses and visitors too.

“Damn, have you two been through the ringer or what.”

All my lips can produce is an agreeing hum, but they begin to buzz from his next words. 

“I’m glad you two have each other to hold on to during shit like this, though.”

“Yeah, me too. I don’t know what I’d do without him, I really don’t because . . I’m pregnant too.”

“Wait, what?!” his exclamation is short and brings his feet to an abrupt halt. It’s there, the wanting to laugh at the astonishment freezing his features but I can’t. Instead, I let myself be happy for a moment, because I want that more. 

“Yeah, just found out . . a few days before Harry . .”

“Well, holy shit, you really do beat me to everything. God, would you come here and give your big brother a hug?” I think I feel it coming, and when his arms come around me excitedly, I think maybe I could laugh so I try. “Bloody hell, I’m gonna be an uncle, imagine that. Uncle Robbie. I like the ring to that.”

It dances on my lips, but it’s stolen away by a thought that blossoms into a sentence, “It’s not how I wanted to tell you,” I admit quietly before he releases me, wiping a hand over each of my cheeks quickly. “Or thought I would be.”

“It’s still pretty fucking exciting. You’re gonna be a mum, Ree, you’ve always wanted that. You must be so happy,” Robbie coos, squeezing my arm. I wasn’t aware of where we were going, seeing as how I didn’t know the place either, even Harry’s floor. “Well, would you look at that. Aren’t they something?”

“Harry’s over the moon,” I murmur, stopping at his side. 

“Figured that much. You still haven’t told me if you are, but I’m assuming so seeing as how you played with bloody dolls until we were nearly  thirteen.”

My snarky comment is overdue, but then again, so is his. I’m not sure if I have any left in me nowadays. They’re especially miles away as I watch the squirming pink faces on the other side of the glass before us. 

“I am, but . . “

“Which one ya reckon?” Robbie speaks up, nodding his head.

“Back right corner.”

“Evidence, Attorney Styles?”

“Dark curly hair and chubby cheeks. They’re the cutest one, and they’re not crying, even though the rest are. That would be my baby. And you?”

“No, this was you and Skye’s game, picking out which baby was yours in the nursery and naming them. I just watched you two goofs dreaming of being mums one day . . Where’s it gone, Ree, that dream of yours?”

“I’m scared to be a mum, Robbie. Not as much as when I first found out- I mean, it still doesn’t seem real, but I’m afraid . . afraid that I’ll be a bad one. Especially after Mum told me so.”

“What?” I already know they’re there, waiting on me, even with my eyes fixed on the few rows of squirming babies behind the glass partition. 

“Yeah, she always just has impeccable timing. Called the other day to bitch about me not showing up for lunch, then about not telling her I got engaged, and that I was such a terrible person because of it all that I shouldn’t be a mother,” my voice caught on the last word, like a sock on a loose nail head on the floor. Gulping, I take a moment to breathe before going on. “I haven’t answered a text since I’ve been here or a call, but I see them. I told her to never talk to me again and she keeps texting me. I guess I forgot to block her number, but I don’t really feel like I know how to do anything anymore, but worry about Harry and think about him. And throwing up.”

“Give me your phone,” he doesn’t need to say it twice and nor do I ask, handing it over. Trusting him, I look back to the nursery. 

“God, they’re so tiny. Look at that one, Bee, she’s going to give them a bath . . I can’t believe they’ll be that small- mine and Harry’s baby.”

“Don’t listen to Mum, she has no place to speak. I’m on my last straw with her too.”

“You don’t have to drop her just because of me, you know. I know you two were different, she was nicer to you and didn’t have a piano to abuse you with too,” the nurse unwraps the wailing baby, exposing their small pink body to the cold air. My heart clenches at the sight, amazed at how small they are, and cute. I already for the hundredth time wonder what Harry and I’s baby will look like, just half of those times being in the last few days. 

“How do you not know I can tell when you’re lying? Been able to since we were like, four. Here, I blocked all of her numbers that I know of, work and otherwise, and emails too. Complete radio silence, which is what you need right now . . And I mean it, Ree, there was never anything there with Mum and I. After a while, I figured out she just used me to get to you and Dad, and I’ve had enough of giving her third and fourth chances.”

“Welcome to the club,” I chirp, feeling a corner of my mouth raise watching the little fists of the baby clench and fingers spread. 

“You’ll be a great one, there’s nothing else for you to be. Bloody hell, we were in nursery, not even in school quite yet, and you’d already decided you’d wanted to be a mum,” Robbie remarks, swinging an arm around me. I lean into him, eyes glued to the newborn baby the nurse was washing up. 

“You better not tell Harry about the baby dolls.”

Glancing up, I look into his eyes, watching his lips spread mischievously.

“Thanks for the idea, and you best bet I’ll be getting that kid on a motorcycle before Harry can.” 

“Good luck with that. I doubt he’ll let you beat him to it,” my remark comes. 

My lip burns when my teeth press down into it again, reminded of my old habit once again, the way I tend to take my stress out on it. Just like somebody I know. The thought of Harry on a motorcycle scares me for just a split second, until I remind myself that he’s rode one for how many years? How many times had I ridden on it with him too? Regardless, it doesn’t calm the flare of worry inside of me, not wanting to worry about Harry getting hurt ever again. 

God, please no. 

I wasn’t sure how long we had been away when our feet brought us back to the room, and there I found him awake. 

“There’s me girl,” he whispers with a warm grin, eyes finding me first. They continue to brighten softly when Robbie appears behind me.

“Hey, Harry,” my brother greets softly with a weak wave. 

“Hey t’ you too.” 

“How are you doing?” Robbie asks, stepping up to him and patting him on the shoulder gently. 

“Been better,” Harry suffices. “Think tha worst me ‘s me wrist ‘s fractured . . Can’t have a good wank now.” 

The laugh I’d grown up hearing floats around the room now, and like always, mine joins it. I’m shaking my head in the doorway, watching two of my favorite guys in the entire world. 

“Harry, you’re right handed, silly.” 

“I know, but sometimes ‘s fun t’ change it up . . Right, Robbie?” my fiance quips, somehow his humor is still so present. My brother murmurs a confirmation, and then the room grows silent. 

“I hear you two are going to be parents next year.”

“I see Becks ‘s havin’ fun . . tellin’ ev’rybody,” Harry comments. Walking around Robbie’s side, it takes a moment to catch those green eyes. They raise an eyebrow at me in question. “‘ve only got t’ tell Myles so far . . no fun.” 

“You can take the credit, if you want, mate,” Robbie snickers, stuffing his hands into his pockets awkwardly. 

“Sure can, ‘s me swimmers that won tha race.” 

“Oh my god, Harry,” my words collapse into a laugh. I almost stop when I hear his, wanting to savor his trademark wheeze that I’ve always found so endearing. 

“It’s good to see you’re still giving everybody a run for their money.” 

“There’s no stoppin’ me,” Harry comments, meeting my eyes and winking. Too soon. 

/

All of the Halloween films had been gone from the telly for a few weeks now, but one or two lingered here and there. I had found one of The Addams Family’s on the tv in Harry’s room. It was welcomed, the respite from reality for a little longer. Visitors had been in and out of his room all day, hence why he was fast asleep when I looked over to check on him. Again. It was the family who hadn’t come the day before, an auntie and uncle of his I’d only met once. The hardest of them all was his grandma Claire, because her tears came as soon as she saw Harry, and so did mine. It had gotten easier to talk to his mum and sister, but it was still difficult to talk at all. Even to Harry, who still wasn’t all of the way there. 

I wasn’t sure how long it’d been since the movie finished, except that the clock was ticking faster than I thought. He wasn’t waking up any time soon by the sounds of his loud snores, and I was conflicted about wanting him to. It had grown dark outside long ago and the halls were growing quieter. An anxious warmth was building inside of me, knowing that with each dreaded tick of the clock, I was closer to having to leave. I thought that if maybe, just maybe he didn’t wake up for a while that I could talk my way into staying the night here. Still, part of me knew that I couldn’t do that- that I shouldn’t do that to him. Harry was right that I needed the sleep, we both did, but a heavy knot formed in my stomach when I thought about leaving his side for longer than well, ten minutes. 

A hushed sound pulls me from my thoughts, and I lift my head to find what it is. The image before me roots me to the spot and I don’t dare blink. For what reason, I don’t know. A hiccup spreads through my chest as I stare back, suddenly aware of the wetness gathering on my cheeks. 

“Buggie.” 

“I’m sorry, didn’t mean to wake you,” my whispered words came in a hasty string. My quick work of the wet trails on my cheeks is next, wondering why I’m suddenly self conscious. 

“Don’t gotta apologize,” he insists. There isn’t a smooshing of his brows together or a glazed look to his eyes. His jaw isn’t clenched and if anything, I fill with happiness at finding him waking seemingly without pain, for one of the first times today. “C’mere, Becks.” 

His hand is firm around mine and so is his tugging, but the shake of my head is even more. I try not to dwell on the disappointment lingering in his eyes, knowing that I couldn’t handle that among everything else. I can’t. No, not when I’m going to have to get out of that bed to just get into another, one that’s empty and cold. I know too well that I wouldn’t be able to leave it once I slide under the covers with him. 

“Ev’rythin’ will be okay again,” he hums, voice still thick with sleep. From the corner of my eye, I can see his there, vying for my attention. What I focus on instead is my hand enclosed in his, and the feeling of his skin under my circling thumb. Then, there’s the still shocking appearance of his naked fingers, instead covered with scrapes and crusty cuts. To my surprise, they lift and he struggles to wipe at my cheeks. I can’t stop the smile that lives on my lips for a moment. 

“I don’t wanna go home. I don’t . . want things to be like this anymore.” 

“I know, bug . . Me too.” 

“I don’t want to worry about you getting hurt again, l-like this,” the words are a jumble flowing from my lips. “I-,” struggling to articulate well, anything, my words are lost in another pool of tears. 

“Becks,” Harry coos but I’m shaking my head. 

“I don’t wanna do all of this without you . . any of it, Harry,” lifting my head, I find his tired greens with my own. My heart squeezes at the invading thought of when will there be a time when they’re not glassy and full of exhaustion? “I can’t.”

“Neither do I, Becks . . ‘d never wanna leave you . . and our baby,” his reply arrives in a sigh, and my head is nodding up and down. His words are felt in my heart and in the way he squeezes my hand emphatically. 

“That case it . . it was too high profile, Harry. Neither of us knew it at first until it was too late, but-.” 

“But was too risky, I know . . Whole world was watchin’ . . Nasty people involved, obviously . . I won’t do it anymo,’ Becks.” 

The alarm paints my body in seconds, and then my voice, “What?” He only looks back at me, blinking long and slowly. “Harry, you don’t mean stopping practicing.” 

“God, no,” he disagrees quickly, swiping his tongue out across his lips. “‘d never, y’know that . . I won’t be back fer a while from tha sounds o’ it . . But, ‘ll make a promise t’ you . . No mo’ big cases like that, dangerous ones . . No, we’re startin’ a family now, and I wanna be ‘round . . fer ev’ry second o’ ours kids’ lives . . yours . . . my whole life with you.” 

He had gotten me where he had wanted me by now, close enough to kiss and I couldn’t resist. The last place I wanted to be was away from him, and afterwards, I found my head resting on my arm laid by his side. 

“Thank you.” 

“‘Course, my bug,” his smile warms me like sunshine on a brisk winter day. That and the way he pinches my cheek between his fingers, bringing a similar lift to my lips. It’s moments before I speak again, a few blissful ones of watching him. 

“Does this still mean I have to go back home tonight?” 

The regret comes in a sour wave when I watch the happiness fade from his face, guilt arriving inside me soon after. My eyes fall from his when his answer doesn’t come right away, telling me it then and there. 

“You should, bug . . ‘s fer tha best,” his words still smell of the orange jello he’d had with his dinner, something he had made so many jokes about. He was almost as bad as me, making me spoon feed him and cut his food up like a little baby. But he was my baby, my first one, I guess. “They say ‘ll be able t’ go home in a week or so, that’s good news . . We’re one day closer . . You’ll be okay, ‘ll see you ‘gain in tha mornin.’” 

“Yeah, it’s fine,” I murmur, my head lowering to rest my chin on my arm, replicating the action of my heart. But I’d be lying if I said it hadn’t fallen into the pit of my stomach long ago, unable to find a way out yet. 

/

“Please?”

    “No,” he huffs, a high pitched whine attached to his words. “‘m full, can’t eat another bite.” 

    Clutching his tummy, Harry stares back at me with eyebrows furrowed. 

    “Don’t you pout at me, mister,” I challenge him, waiting for a flicker of something across his face. “Just one more bite, Harry.” 

    “No.” 

    “Harry,” I sigh, dropping my hand and giving him a look. His head slowly shakes from side to side. “God, I hope our baby isn’t this stubborn.” 

    “With you as ‘s mum, I dunno.” 

    “Hey!” I exclaim, words pouring into a laugh when I catch his playful eyes. If I look close enough, I can find the dimple there in one of his cheeks. The little shit. “Eat your jello, for God’s sake.” 

    “Fine, woman,” he relents, face relaxing when I guide the spoon towards his lips. The sound of his chewing fills the quiet room. “Yer gonna be a wonderful mother, y’know.” 

    I don’t know why, but it pulls my head up in surprise. His dimple falls deeper when I find the sage shade of his eyes again. 

    “‘m so happy yer gonna be tha mum o’ me kids.” 

    “Stop it, you’re going to make me cry,” it’s an almost whisper, but the dryness of my throat speaks truth into the words. 

    “I mean it, bug.” All abashed, I feel the heat paint my cheeks as I fold the napkin to stuff into the empty Jello tin. “Who’d have thought it’d be you and me . . Huh, Becks?” 

    “Yeah, talk about mad,” I sniffle, lifting my head as a tear falls down my cheek. “My old boss, Mr. Styles, the best lawyer in all of London.” 

    “Tha lawyer and tha assistant,” his voice is soft as a feather against my skin, and so is his thumb against my palm. Glancing down, the tears stuck to my eyelashes blur the sentiment of his thumb drawing circles on my skin. 

    “And their baby.” 

    “And tha baby,” he almost giggles, it’s so close. But there it is, his trademark wheeze, and I couldn’t be more thankful. “Not sure I can keep it from me mum anymo’ . . ‘s almost came out a few times.” 

    “I know, me too. When do you think we should tell your mum?”

    “What’s this you have to tell me?” somebody says from the doorway. A prickly warmth spreads across my insides at their voice. It disappears within moments when my eyes glide over to his, and he’s calm as a cucumber. 

    One of his eyebrows raises with that always tired smile, and I nod. “C’mere, mum, ‘ve got somethin’ t’ tell you.” 

    “What’s that?” Harry’s mum says, and we meet eyes when I turn to watch her walk in. She sets down a soda cup from the cafe downstairs, and I watch a look of Harry’s come over her face. “Everything alright? You two are crying, it’s scaring me,” she tries to laugh but it doesn’t go very far. 

    “Would you like to do the honors?” I nearly croak, bringing my attention back to Harry. Despite the energy he was slowly getting back, he still looked pooped. But for a second, the sunshine glowed across his face, and because of that, on us too. 

    “‘Course,” Harry smiles and with a clearing of his throat, announces the news. “Yer gonna be a gran again . . well, in ‘bout eight months or so.” 

    “What?!” at her exclamation, I’m suddenly not sure who to be looking at, and there I find myself glancing between the two. My almost mother in -law and soon to be husband. “Harry- Becky-,” she struggles with the words, turning to look at the both of us before a hand comes to her mouth and she’s crying. 

    “Bloody hell . . why d’you women cry so much?” he says, and we both turn to find his eyes welling with tears too, making all of us laugh. 

    “Oh, loves, I’m so happy for you. You’re both going to be wonderful parents,” she blubbers, almost squeezing the air out of me when it’s time for a hug. Her familiar floral scent and trademark coffee smell surrounds me as I laugh through the tears. “And, Harry, it took you long enough.” 

    “Hey!” 

    “That’s what I told him, he’s getting old,” I snicker, finding his perturbed look makes me laugh, again. I’d laughed more in the last few minutes than I had in days, and it felt . . good. 

    “Double hey! Watch it, wifey.” 

    It comes with a grin and a drink of sunshine, “Okay, husband.” 

    I feel it fill me when the annoyance on his face is washed away by a content smile, one that only grows bigger when his mum turns to me with questions, and a notch wider when her hand comes to my belly. His not too far away. 

/

    I finally packed a bag, but you couldn’t have gotten me to go in our bedroom for any other reason besides that. Not even Skye could for more than the five minutes that took me. It had to have been a packing record, and one Harry would have been proud of. It didn’t get easier, the leaving him every night and coming back to him every morning, but we found a routine. That didn’t mean the difficulty disappeared at having to unwrap my hand from his at nine o’clock when he was already sleeping, knowing that I wouldn’t be able to once I slipped under my covers. It was the hardest thing I’d ever done, and I did it again and again, day after day. 

    The tears crept up on me at times, like when Myles brought Rose and Jennings to see him, and Harry cried the second they walked in. They painted my cheeks like a waterfall when Asher showed up in the first few days, and once again when my dad returned before going back home. I wondered if they’d ever stop as I sat hunched over the toilet for what, a tenth morning in a row, wishing he could be there to rub my back like before. 

But we were so far from before, and still lengths away from the after. 

I still didn’t know if I could do this, despite the instructions, both printed and oral, and that I wasn’t alone. It felt like a rerun, knowing that I was supposed to be happy, but knowing nothing besides fear. Finding its place the second I got in the car, I doubted myself through and through. Not even reminding myself to be happy had helped, because the fear stole it away. 

He was home. I got to bring Harry home, snuggle him up on the sofa where the new headquarters was, and never have to go back to that hospital again. Well, not for a while, anyway. 

“Whatcha thinkin’ ‘bout?” a voice murmurs, yanking me from my ever-consuming thoughts. Blinking, I find myself back in the present and in front of the television. Harry’s feet were cold in my hands despite the fuzzy purple socks I put on them before we left the hospital this morning. 

“Nothing,” I lie, leaving my eyes set on the news channel where I’d left them before zoning out. 

“You lie,” he sighs with a slight giggle, shifting on the sofa. “You look tired, bug. Why don’t we go and take a nap?”

“I’m fine.” 

“Again, you lie,” Harry huffs, his toe brushing against my hand. “I know ‘s already been a long day, Becks. Tha throwin’ up this mornin’, all tha instructions, and you haven’t had much t’ eat- well, that you’ve kept down,” Getting the cue, I drag my eyes over to him, failing to ignore how heavy they feel. 

The splashes of color across his face, and entire body, had faded in the last nine days. A few stitches had already been removed for more superficial cuts, but others still remained as well as the bandages taped to his shoulder and thigh. I’d been shown time and time again over the course of his hospital stay how to change them, and somehow, I still dreaded it. His mum had volunteered to do it if I couldn’t, but that only made me feel worse, as if I can’t say no. 

His name for me tickles my ears and I blink, his tired face focusing in my view. His cheeks were pink again, but only a dusty shade and so were his lips. It confused me, how they could send him home and he still didn’t look like himself. Yes, he did, but not really. I almost wanted to tell the doctors that they couldn’t, and what if I mess up taking care of him, but how could I say any of that? 

“Bug,” he tries again, voice holding more fervor now. 

“What?” I mumble, massaging my thumb against the arch of his foot. 

“I wanna go and take a nap with you.” 

There was another thing. He took care of me when I had my car accident, before I even came home. But, I’m smaller than him, and well, he’s quite larger than me. Getting him up off the sofa and to the downstairs guest bedroom took two of us, his mum and I. She had been cooking and cleaning since the minute we got Harry settled after coming home. I still didn’t know how to talk to her after everything, especially now with the baby at the front of my mind. It’d opened this door to tell her about them, but I felt as if it closed for me now with this new hurdle in the way. I had a feeling it wasn’t going to get any better with her staying in the upstairs guest bedroom. Don’t even get me started on how it was driving me up the wall the way the both of them worried about me and the baby. 

“I like tha name Renley. What d’ya think o’ it?” 

Slowly, he was coming to do most of the talking. For the first time in ever, I’d grown annoyed with it and how he wouldn’t shut up sometimes. But then I reminded myself that means he’s getting better and was improving. Guilt leached any happiness anyway when a thought came from nowhere, telling me I should be happy that he’s talking, that he’s alive. He sure was, making strides during physical therapy and being able to walk on crutches unassisted. It frightened me more than it excited me, and I wasn’t sure why. I felt as if there was a switch inside of me that I needed to turn on, flick it back to ‘normal’ instead. 

“I know yer not sleepin’ yet,” his voice is warm and slow against my cheek. “Rebecca.” Opening my eyes, they find him only a kiss away. 

“I think it reminds me of Renley Baratheon from Game of Thrones.” 

His breathy laugh dances across my cheek, and somehow, I smile. I think I manage one at seeing the dimples fall into his cheeks. 

“I think ‘s unique and pretty. Fer a boy or a girl.” 

Nodding replaces my voice and closing my eyes pulls me away from the eyes that I can’t lie to. 

“I thought you wanted to name them Annie if it’s a girl, like after your mum.” 

“I do, but what if ‘s a boy, Becks? We need some boy names too,” Harry muses, words swallowed by a yawn. “Mmm, think I like Eleanor too. There are so many nicknames you can make out of it, and I like those old names.” 

“Me too,” it’s a lazy murmur as his fingers start to comb through my hair, and then I know that I’m screwed. But I think for one of the first times in a long time, I fall asleep feeling safe, because of him beside me, with the smallest inkling of being okay. 

/

The night is still and so is the darkness that sounds of Harry’s soft snores. I’d woken up every night since that nightmare of a call, and even now, when he was finally back in the bed beside me, it happened again. Sure, it was the same bed I’d called my own for the last week and a half, but why now? That one word had been popping into my head often recently and punctuated with a question mark that was never answered. Why? My stomach was fine, so it wasn’t that, but what was it then? I hadn’t even had a nightmare- well, not yet, anyway. 

It was taking me awhile to believe that maybe my life didn’t have to be one anymore. Just maybe. 

[hardkinkbardkink]

anon asked: Incubus!Jask at Kaer Morhen, having enthralled the witcher boys (+Ves? Your call.) wanting to watch them fuck only to be surprised they’re all... small? Maybe it’s the mutations fault. No matter. Jask makes them get off with each other by making them lap at each others’ cocks like they’re cunts, fingering one another until they’re squirming like pups begging for Jaskier’s cock to breed their needy holes because no other cocks will do. Bonus for puppy play, and forced orgasms because I could see someone like Eskel or Lambert snapping out of it for a moment while Geralt is humping their thigh and being horrified until Jaskier talks him down, asking “don’t you like being my pup? Doesn’t it feel good to have your little cunny touched?” Until they’re re-enthralled for Jaskier’s sole amusement.

so this is,,, my favourite prompt i’d ever got? truly? and that’s not to say that the other asks i get aren’t fucking amazing cos they very much are but this just hit all the points for me. all of them. lord have mercy.

this is filthy overstim tiny cock mind-controlled porn thru & thru oof i’m a bit hot under the collar not gonna lie to you babes

now also on the ao3 near you

***

At first Jaskier’d thought it was a joke. How could he not? The concept of a witcher letting him tag along for the monster-slaying ride was rich enough. The idea–the very idea of being invited to the place that was basically Geralt’s home, and home to his brothers, to other witchers–

It was, very much, not a joke, if the cold ache that’s seeped through his joints and the monolithic, run-down keep standing stark against the grey sky are anything to go by.

“This seems like a needlessly intricate plot just to kill me, you do realise. You could easily have done it at any moment and I wouldn’t even notice you draw the blade.”

Geralt never appreciates this particular vein of his humour.

“I won’t–”

“Yes, yes, you won’t kill me, I know, you boring old man.”

The heavy oaken door squeaks horribly when Jaskier pushes it open with some considerable effort. Geralt doesn’t move to help him, the great brute that he is, resigning instead to stewing in his insufferable self-righteousness.

The inside of the keep is no less cold than the outside, though there are at least three lit hearths in the big, open hall alone. At least there’s no snow. Jaskier looks around, overwhelmed by how awfully bland and devoid of style everything is. A long table with two equally long benches on either side seems to be the hall’s biggest attraction, and Jaskier nearly weeps at the thought of the sad, sad souls that have come through here. No wonder Geralt is the way he is.

“Witchers–” Geralt continues suddenly when Jaskier’s already long moved on from the subject.

“–are immune to incubus magic, yes, Geralt, you told me. I do listen sometimes, you know.”

“He never listens, though, so he assumes nobody else does either,” comes a beautiful voice speaking the whole truth and the truth only.

Jaskier turns as quickly as his stiff limbs will allow him.

“Eskel,” Geralt growls in–what, a threat? Even in his own home, the man resorts to threats?

“Eskel!” Jaskier repeats with the cheer it deserves. He’s heard only great things about Eskel. He extends a hand in greeting, and shivers when Eskel takes it in his own, gloveless in this awful chill. “Pleasure.”

“The pleasure’s all mine.”

Eskel’s smile, Jaskier thinks, is quite striking, just as the rest of him. Broad shoulders and thick thighs, dark hair peeking out from under the collar of his shirt, a playful glint in his golden eyes, the exact copies of Geralt’s–

He shivers again, and not from the temperature.

Another set of footsteps echoes through the hall, obnoxiously loud. Geralt walks silently, like a cat slinking in the shadows. Eskel seems about the same way. Whoever this is must just enjoy being a right pompous prick for the sake of it.

Jaskier gets introduced to Lambert and grows a little bit warmer when all three witchers gather around him, tower above him, really, walking, talking mountains of muscle and strength and gods, fuck, Jaskier’s so hungry.

He shouldn’t have agreed to come, but Geralt’s assured him they’ll figure it out.

They are yet to figure it out.

But he gets as many cups of mulled wine as his little heart desires, and Geralt soon brightens up around his brothers, cracking jokes as they all shove at each other playfully like they’re still wolf pups instead of hundred-year-old men.

The evening, all in all, ends up pleasant. Jaskier falls asleep calm and safe, ignoring the sucking emptiness inside him.

***

So here’s the thing.

Sometimes, he thinks Geralt makes himself forget about Jaskier’s inhuman heritage.

Sometimes, he thinks maybe Geralt really believes he doesn’t need to feed on energy because he scarfs down half a loaf of bread at breakfast.

Sometimes, he wishes someone would strike him down, so he doesn’t have to be so achingly hungry anymore.

And everyone’s being so nice to him, so accommodating–he’s embarrassed to ask them for anything more when they already give him so much.

And, here’s another thing.

Witchers are not actually immune to incubus magic.

Jaskier’s never had the heart to tell Geralt.

The poor dear once told him no when Jaskier half-jokingly asked to suck his cock and really thought his mighty witcher-brain is immune to Jaskier’s power.

It is decidedly not the truth.

Jaskier makes it a whole week, waiting for Geralt to offer himself or anyone else up–Jaskier would even take a sacrificial virgin in a pinch–but he stays famished and weakening by the day.

He means to only take a little, at first. He finds Eskel and Lambert in the courtyard. Compelling them to drop their swords and follow him inside is child’s play.

Jaskier walks them up to his bedroom–the only chamber in this whole blasted keep that’s even remotely warm–and thrums with anticipation as he practically skips up the steps.

He means to only take a little, so he gets Lambert on his knees and makes for Eskel to shove his undoubtedly glorious cock down his throat, except–

Except that he doesn’t think Eskel’s cock could reach Lambert’s throat in any capacity.

Oh.

When Lambert peels away his own leathers, and his dick turns out similarly sized, Jaskier burns with curiosity.

He motions for his boys to come forward, half-tangled in their clothes still, and they come to sit on the bed with him. He pets their precious tiny pricks and they squirm deliciously.

Oh, he’s got to find Geralt.

He leaves them to undress and sprints through the keep at inhuman speed, dipping his head into various rooms until he spots the shock of white hair. Geralt’s defences are so embarrassingly low, Jaskier doesn’t even have to try particularly hard to catch him under a spell.

Eskel and Lambert are knelt dutifully in front of the bed, their clothes strewn all about, their expressions blissed-out like Jaskier’s never seen them before. He helps Geralt undress–gods, and Geralt’s prick is even smaller, somehow–before directing him to his knees between his brothers.

Jaskier practically vibrates with eagerness.

He meant only to take a little, but now he thinks he’ll have all of it, and then some for dessert, until he’s bursting with it.

Gods, the possibilities are endless.

Jaskier makes himself comfortable, leaning back on the cushions, facing his obedient pups.

“My good boys. My darling, perfect pups. You’re even more breathtaking than I could ever imagine.”

Someone whines pitifully at the words.

“Oh, it’s high time someone took care of you, isn’t it? Look how wet your gorgeous cocks are getting, and I barely even touched you.”

He wants to touch, but even more he wants to watch.

“Eskel, my lovely, why don’t you lay down for me? That’s it, heart. Open your mouth nice and wide–”

Jaskier looks on, transfixed, as his pups shuffle to accommodate his wants; Eskel on his back on the furs, Lambert straddling his face, cute prick hovering just above his parted lips. He’s got Geralt on his belly, face buried between Eskel’s legs.

“My, look at you. Go on, dears, you must be ravenous.”

He can’t settle on where to look–to watch clumsy tongues lap desperately at each other’s cocks, or their faces twist in unadulterated pleasure. Just as he fixes his wandering gaze on where Lambert’s got his lip between his teeth, he catches a glimpse of Geralt rutting his tiny prick against the edge of the fur.

He waits until he can just feel the static of release cloying the air, all his pups whimpering as they approach the precipice–and orders them apart. They kneel again, their chests heaving and cocks throbbing, clad only in their medallions.

“What would my pups want? Do you want to fingerfuck your needy holes, since none of you have a cock to do it? I’ll give you something bigger, when you’re all nice and loose.”

“Please,” Geralt says quietly and crawls up the bed. He comes to straddle one of Jaskier’s thighs, his prick flushed a delightful pink, deliciously wet at the head, and Jaskier’s sure greater men would have succumbed.

“Oh, is my puppy desperate?”

Geralt nods frantically as he rides Jaskier’s thigh, spreading sticky precome all over the fabric of his trousers.

“You’ll have to wait your turn to get bred full, then, heart, since your brothers are so patient.”

He brushes Geralt’s hair to the side and shivers when Geralt comes with a series of lovely, high-pitched moans, feeling the shadow of his pup’s release at the base of his spine.

“Good boy. But you’re so greedy, darling, you’ve left your brothers waiting. Better make it up to them, yeah?”

Geralt nods again and scrambles off the bed to push at Eskel’s chest and get him to lay back down again. This time Geralt throws Eskel’s legs over his shoulders and laps hungrily at his hole. Jaskier makes Lambert return to sit on Eskel’s face, turned the other way as he rides Eskel’s tongue and moans wantonly.

They both take a finger beautifully, even before Jaskier hands them the oil.

Gods, Jaskier has to palm his own cock when he thinks about his pups, made-over and trained to be killing machines–helpless as he forces them to take their pleasure, squirming on each other’s fingers and tongues, moaning and whimpering and begging in broken, breathy whispers to be taken and bred and filled.

He watches Eskel stretched on three fingers, his powerful thighs quivering. Jaskier feels the frantic crescendo of his pup’s orgasm, can taste the panic that rises in him because he didn’t get the permission to come yet.

“Do you like Geralt’s fingers, darling? Want to come on them? Go on, Eskel, my lovely, let go for me.”

Eskel’s little cock twitches before he comes with a sob, draining his heavy balls all over his belly, but he never stops driving his fingers relentlessly into Lambert’s slack hole.

“You too, Lambert, baby, come for me whenever you feel like it. Look how good it was for your brothers.”

Lambert only takes a few more harsh thrusts before he nearly collapses forward, seizing up and shooting his load over Eskel’s chest with a full-bodied tremor.

“Good. Gods, you’re all so good, so lovely, you make my heart ache.”

They make other parts of him ache, too.

When Geralt moves up to dutifully clean Eskel’s skin of seed, from his flushed chest all the way to his sensitive cock, Jaskier’s resolve breaks.

He divests himself quickly of his clothes, and his pups stare adoringly, hungrily, at the sticky-wet tip of his cock.

And Jaskier immediately knows that he loves all of them equally–but he needs Geralt to have the last turn, and he’s wanted Eskel ever since he’d first laid eyes on him that first day.

“You can all come up on the bed now, loves.”

His pups drool all over themselves, watching his prick bob between his legs, and Jaskier can’t believe they were to deprive themselves all winter, when they so fiercely want for a big fat cock to stuff them silly. His heart breaks for them, just a little.

He kisses Lambert deeply, his darling too out of it to do it properly, licking into Jaskier’s mouth with a sloppy tongue like the desperate puppy he is. They all try to get comfortable around him, even with the aching emptiness between their legs, but Jaskier’s quick to remedy that.

“Lambert, my sweet, be a dear and open Geralt up while I breed Eskel’s tight little hole.”

Jaskier reclines with his back against the wall, so he can see Geralt open his legs wantonly and Lambert quickly get between them.

But most importantly, he can urge Eskel onto his lap, his pup’s glorious thighs spreading wide over his own as he looks at Jaskier with blind adoration.

“You want my cock, darling? Want to finally be so very full?” Jaskier asks in a whisper, giving Eskel his full attention, like his baby deserves.

“Please, please.” Eskel’s soothing, deep voice trembles a bit as he tries to speak. “Want you so bad, it hurts.”

Jaskier shushes him before pressing his lips gently to Eskel’s. The kiss is more cohesive than his last, Eskel groaning quietly when Jaskier sucks on his tongue.

“I know, you just want to get fucked, nice and proper, huh? I bet you get no relief on the path, with that pitiful little excuse for a cock–want me to breed you like the good little fuckhole you are, darling? I’ll leave you dripping.”

He smooths his hands over Eskel’s thighs to urge him up, so he can press his throbbing cockhead against Eskel’s greedy hole. It swallows him all at once, steals the breath from his lungs when Eskel’s bottom presses against the tops of his legs.

“Oh, Eskel, my love–” Jaskier rambles, because the feel of his pup, coupled with the sight he makes–wide open eyes, glazed-over in elation, his lips swollen and pink, his tiny prick hard again and bobbing against his belly when Eskel begins bouncing on Jaskier’s cock–

Gods, how did he ever think he could have just a little?

“Take what you need, whatever you need, darling, oh, you’re divine, you’re perfect.”

Eskel whimpers and leans in to bury his face in Jaskier’s neck, overwhelmed, but Jaskier doesn’t mind. He rubs his puppy’s back, and keeps fucking him, as slowly and as quickly as Eskel needs from him, sinking into his sinful hole again and again until Eskel shakes with it, until he can’t go anymore.

Jaskier pushes him gently onto his back and keeps driving into him, faster now, and Eskel sobs beautifully with each thrust. They share a feverish kiss and Jaskier finally gets his hands on that alluring chest, squeezing Eskel’s pecks and rubbing his nipples gently. Eskel arches into his touch and moans raggedly.

“Such a good boy, such a good pup–do you want me to touch your cute prick, love? Want me to rub your little clit?”

Eskel nods, his voice climbing frantically around a string of yes yes yes. It barely takes a full touch to his swollen, ruddy prick before Eskel pulses around Jaskier’s cock, thrashes on the bed with his head thrown back.

“Stunning, oh, that’s perfect–”

Jaskier pumps his darling pup full of hot seed and marvels when Eskel immediately quakes through another orgasm, before the first even subsides. Jaskier peppers his face with tiny kisses, wants to drown Eskel in affection. When he makes to pull out, Eskel whines and claws at his shoulders.

“I know, I know, pup, but I need to see to your brothers. Gods, I wish I had something to plug you up with, so you’re always nice and full.”

He does manage to pull out, and gets to watch Eskel’s puffy hole leak out his spend copiously. He leans down to lap it up, because how can he not? Eskel’s legs grip vice-tight around his head for a moment.

Eskel’s still convulsing periodically when Jaskier arranges him on his knees, straddling one of Geralt’s thighs, so they can hump each other like the needy pups they are.

“Lambert, love, would you like to suck a real cock, finally? I can shove it down your throat before I breed your lovely hole.”

And Lambert scrambles to get his mouth on Jaskier’s come-streaked cock so fast he nearly falls backwards and off the edge of the bed.

“Careful, dear, so you don’t choke. Gods, you are just my perfect cock-hungry sluts, aren’t you? How will I ever let you go?”

Geralt whimpers beautifully next to him, and Jaskier looks over to his other boys while he cards gentle fingers through Lambert’s hair.

Eskel’s too sensitive, Jaskier knows, and yet he still ruts his prick against Geralt like he’ll die without it. Their foreheads rest together. It only takes the smallest nudge to have them kiss, tentatively at first, then increasingly more hotly, until they’re both moaning with the intensity of it.

“Is this how my pups spend the winters? Rutting against each other desperately, lapping at your pathetic little pricks like they’re cunts? Writhing on fingers because there isn’t a cock in sight to fill you like you so very crave?”

Geralt shakes violently and grabs fistfuls of Eskel’s hair when he spills, yet the rhythm of his hips never falters. Jaskier smiles at them warmly, tugs Lambert’s head up and down, relishing the tight clutch of his throat.

Except there’s something threatening to ruin his perfect evening, and he can feel one of his pups slipping from his thrall.

Eskel jerks away slightly, as much as he can with Geralt still straddling his leg. His eyes aren’t filled with bliss and lust, but wide with confusion and, inexplicably, terror.

“You–” Eskel begins, trying to wrestle out of Geralt’s hold.

Jaskier shushes him calmly. “Oh, darling is something the matter? You do like being my lovely pup, don’t you?” He can see Eskel pause when he no doubt notices his sopping wet hole drooling all over the sheets. “Don’t you like your little boy parts touched, love? Doesn’t it feel good to be stuffed with my seed?”

Eskel’s sharp, golden eyes quickly lose their focus. Geralt whines and leans in for a kiss. Eskel opens his mouth somewhat reluctantly, still.

“That’s it, pup, just let yourself be cared for, isn’t that better? If you’re good I’ll have you warm my cock all night.”

Jaskier still has some tricks up his sleeve, so he snaps his fingers and has Eskel crashing through a sudden, dry orgasm, his lovely prick throbbing visibly.

“Maybe it’s for the better you don’t have real cocks. I can have your little boy pricks coming again and again, just as a woman would.”

Lambert gives a strangled groan around Jaskier’s cock, his release thick and heavy in the air without anyone even glancing at his dick. Amazing.

Jaskier urges his lovely pup up, gives him a chaste kiss before asking,

“How do you want it, darling?”

“Hard,” Lambert replies without hesitation, and settles on his hands and knees, his pink, sloppy hole perfectly on display.

Jaskier urges Eskel and Geralt to lay down, grind their oversensitive, aching pricks against each other. Their whimpers are a beautiful background for the slow, dizzying push of his cock into Lambert’s tight body.

“Oh, love, you’ve got such a nice, tight cunt, fuck–”

Lambert chokes on a breath, forces his hips back, overeager and hungry for every bit of cock he can get. Jaskier couldn’t deny him, wouldn’t want to anyway.

“That’s it, that’s right, I’ll fuck you until you can’t stand it anymore, darling, you’ll be feeling it for days.”

His hips hasten, until he’s snapping into Lambert with brutal force, jostling the whole bed, spurred on by the constant babble of more, harder, yes, yes.

“Will you finger your sore hole, thinking about my cock? Will you try to get Eskel’s tiny prick into you, to satisfy the ache?”

Lambert keens, and shakes his head vigorously.

“Just you, need your cock, need a real cock–”

The slap of Jaskier’s balls against Lambert’s is indecently satisfying. Jaskier brings his hand down with a crack on Lambert’s magnificent arse, and then a few more times, when Lambert hollers and the sharp scent of his intensifying arousal makes Jaskier half-rabid.

“Like that, darling? Want to be abused? Want me to bruise your little cunt until you sob with it?”

“Please, please, oh–”

Sobbing is not far off, it seems. Jaskier feels the tingle of power in every part of his body, in the air around them, everywhere, everywhere, raw carnal energy for him to devour.

Jaskier comes before Lambert does, but his pup isn’t far behind, milking the last of Jaskier’s release as he spills onto the sheets with a broken whimper.

“Don’t stop, don’t stop,” Lambert whispers and tries to impale himself on Jaskier’s cock further.

“Greedy. Greedy, slutty pups, you’ve been neglected for so long, you can’t get enough, can you?”

He thrusts languidly, because if there’s one thing he doesn’t lack, it’s stamina.

They fuck for long minutes, Lambert steadily growing louder in his pleas and his moans, Jaskier sweaty and out of breath trying to keep his darling satisfied. Each thrust fucks his seed deeper into Lambert with a wet squelching sound that makes Jaskier dizzy in its obscenity. Which is perhaps why he pulls out of Lambert entirely and rolls his pup to lay belly-up before him.

“How would you like to come inside a nice, warm body, love?”

Lambert whines, his golden eyes blown entirely black.

“Geralt, my darling,” Jaskier calls softly, and Geralt looks up at him with red-rimmed, shining eyes. “You’ll be a good pup and ride Lambert, won’t you?”

“Want a real cock,” Geralt says faintly, voice cracking, but he’s already climbing to sit astride Lambert’s belly, facing Jaskier. “Want your cock.”

“You’ll get it, heart, you’ll get it as much as you want–if you’re a good boy for me.”

Jaskier doesn’t think Lambert’s cock is longer than his fingers, but it’s nice and thick and just big enough to fit inside Geralt without slipping out, at least until Geralt tries to fuck himself on it.

“Jaskier, Jaskier, please–” his pups call out to him, all three in a beautiful symphony.

He’s suddenly obsessed with the thought of Lambert coming inside Geralt, so when Jaskier gets in him his hole is nice and sloppy with spend.

Lambert’s cute little prick is not big enough for Geralt to bounce on it like he so clearly wants.

Easily remedied, that.

“Geralt. Geralt, my darling, the light of my life, my perfect little puppy–” he prattles on in a soft voice before he gives a measured slap to the very tip of Geralt’s cock.

The effect is immediate. Geralt sobs, just the tiniest bit, tightens around Lambert like the most amazing little boy, until Lambert writhes and comes with a scorching hot shout of someone getting to breed a warm hole for the first time in a long time.

Jaskier is dizzy with all this power, lust-drunk and floaty. He can barely contain it. He has to be careful, usually, when it gets this intense, but his perfect pups can take it, were made to take it, gods, gods–

A sharp burst of energy makes his witchers all shudder with release, squirming as it takes them by surprise, their little cocks come-soaked and oversensitive.

“Geralt,” Jaskier says, and he slurs a bit in his haste. His composure is slipping. But his boys are so delicious, so eager and obedient and Geralt spreads his legs so very wide just to show Jaskier his loose, fucked-out hole, and what is he meant to do if not give in to the temptation laid out before him?

Geralt feels so intoxicatingly, unreasonably good, the spell nearly snaps. Jaskier has to keep himself firmly in check, even when everything around him becomes an impossible blur. He fucks Geralt on his back and his stomach, on all fours and against the wall. Vaguely, he registers the small tingle in his abdomen when his other pups come, too, again and again on each other’s fingers and tongues, wailing and screaming as Jaskier unconsciously wrings pleasure out of them long after it’d crossed the line of overstimulated pain.

“Geralt, my lovely, my darling little whore, fuck–you’re all so good, so, so good, ah–”

His pup’s tiny fucking prick twitches when Jaskier closes a palm around it, finds it deliciously soaked and so very sensitive. He licks the single tear that spills down Geralt’s cheek and rubs the heel of his palm over Geralt’s cockhead.

Jaskier blacks out when he finally breeds Geralt full of come.

***

He wakes up wrapped up in his beloved pups, keeping his hold tightly on their minds.

The room had grown cold, but he’s feverishly hot between three strong bodies. Curious, he touches a finger to the swollen head of Lambert’s soft prick, watches him twitch his hips away even asleep. Jaskier pillows his head on a burly chest and closes his eyes.

He’ll let them rest for the day, but by nightfall, Jaskier would very much like to be treated to an extravagant feast again.

[hardkinkbadkink]

Incubus!Jask at Kaer Morhen, having enthralled the witcher boys (+Ves? Your call.) wanting to watch them fuck only to be surprised they’re all... small? Maybe it’s the mutations fault. No matter. Jask makes them get off with each other by making them lap at each others’ cocks like they’re cunts, fingering one another until they’re squirming like pups begging for Jaskier’s cock to breed their needy holes because no other cocks will do. Bonus for puppy play, and forced orgasms (1/2)

(2/2) because I could see someone like Eskel or Lambert snapping out of it for a moment while Geralt is humping their thigh and being horrified until Jaskier talks him down, asking “don’t you like being my pup? Doesn’t it feel good to have your little cunny touched?” Until they’re re-enthralled for Jaskier’s sole amusement.

so this is,,, my favourite prompt i’d ever got? truly? and that’s not to say that the other asks i get aren’t fucking amazing cos they very much are but this just hit all the points for me. all of them. lord have mercy.

this is filthy overstim tiny cock mind-controlled porn thru & thru oof i’m a bit hot under the collar not gonna lie to you babes

now also on the ao3 near you

***

At first Jaskier'd thought it was a joke. How could he not? The concept of a witcher letting him tag along for the monster-slaying ride was rich enough. The idea--the very idea of being invited to the place that was basically Geralt's home, and home to his brothers, to other witchers--

It was, very much, not a joke, if the cold ache that's seeped through his joints and the monolithic, run-down keep standing stark against the grey sky are anything to go by.

"This seems like a needlessly intricate plot just to kill me, you do realise. You could easily have done it at any moment and I wouldn't even notice you draw the blade."

Geralt never appreciates this particular vein of his humour.

"I won't--"

"Yes, yes, you won't kill me, I know, you boring old man."

The heavy oaken door squeaks horribly when Jaskier pushes it open with some considerable effort. Geralt doesn't move to help him, the great brute that he is, resigning instead to stewing in his insufferable self-righteousness.

The inside of the keep is no less cold than the outside, though there are at least three lit hearths in the big, open hall alone. At least there's no snow. Jaskier looks around, overwhelmed by how awfully bland and devoid of style everything is. A long table with two equally long benches on either side seems to be the hall's biggest attraction, and Jaskier nearly weeps at the thought of the sad, sad souls that have come through here. No wonder Geralt is the way he is.

"Witchers--" Geralt continues suddenly when Jaskier's already long moved on from the subject.

"--are immune to incubus magic, yes, Geralt, you told me. I do listen sometimes, you know."

"He never listens, though, so he assumes nobody else does either," comes a beautiful voice speaking the whole truth and the truth only.

Jaskier turns as quickly as his stiff limbs will allow him.

"Eskel," Geralt growls in--what, a threat? Even in his own home, the man resorts to threats?

"Eskel!" Jaskier repeats with the cheer it deserves. He's heard only great things about Eskel. He extends a hand in greeting, and shivers when Eskel takes it in his own, gloveless in this awful chill. "Pleasure."

"The pleasure's all mine."

Eskel's smile, Jaskier thinks, is quite striking, just as the rest of him. Broad shoulders and thick thighs, dark hair peeking out from under the collar of his shirt, a playful glint in his golden eyes, the exact copies of Geralt's--

He shivers again, and not from the temperature.

Another set of footsteps echoes through the hall, obnoxiously loud. Geralt walks silently, like a cat slinking in the shadows. Eskel seems about the same way. Whoever this is must just enjoy being a right pompous prick for the sake of it.

Jaskier gets introduced to Lambert and grows a little bit warmer when all three witchers gather around him, tower above him, really, walking, talking mountains of muscle and strength and gods, fuck, Jaskier's so hungry.

He shouldn't have agreed to come, but Geralt's assured him they'll figure it out.

They are yet to figure it out.

But he gets as many cups of mulled wine as his little heart desires, and Geralt soon brightens up around his brothers, cracking jokes as they all shove at each other playfully like they're still wolf pups instead of hundred-year-old men.

The evening, all in all, ends up pleasant. Jaskier falls asleep calm and safe, ignoring the sucking emptiness inside him.

***

So here's the thing.

Sometimes, he thinks Geralt makes himself forget about Jaskier's inhuman heritage.

Sometimes, he thinks maybe Geralt really believes he doesn't need to feed on energy because he scarfs down half a loaf of bread at breakfast.

Sometimes, he wishes someone would strike him down, so he doesn't have to be so achingly hungry anymore.

And everyone's being so nice to him, so accommodating--he's embarrassed to ask them for anything more when they already give him so much.

And, here's another thing.

Witchers are not actually immune to incubus magic.

Jaskier's never had the heart to tell Geralt.

The poor dear once told him no when Jaskier half-jokingly asked to suck his cock and really thought his mighty witcher-brain is immune to Jaskier's power.

It is decidedly not the truth.

Jaskier makes it a whole week, waiting for Geralt to offer himself or anyone else up--Jaskier would even take a sacrificial virgin in a pinch--but he stays famished and weakening by the day.

He means to only take a little, at first. He finds Eskel and Lambert in the courtyard. Compelling them to drop their swords and follow him inside is child's play.

Jaskier walks them up to his bedroom--the only chamber in this whole blasted keep that's even remotely warm--and thrums with anticipation as he practically skips up the steps.

He means to only take a little, so he gets Lambert on his knees and makes for Eskel to shove his undoubtedly glorious cock down his throat, except--

Except that he doesn't think Eskel's cock could reach Lambert's throat in any capacity.

Oh.

When Lambert peels away his own leathers, and his dick turns out similarly sized, Jaskier burns with curiosity.

He motions for his boys to come forward, half-tangled in their clothes still, and they come to sit on the bed with him. He pets their precious tiny pricks and they squirm deliciously.

Oh, he's got to find Geralt.

He leaves them to undress and sprints through the keep at inhuman speed, dipping his head into various rooms until he spots the shock of white hair. Geralt's defences are so embarrassingly low, Jaskier doesn't even have to try particularly hard to catch him under a spell.

Eskel and Lambert are knelt dutifully in front of the bed, their clothes strewn all about, their expressions blissed-out like Jaskier's never seen them before. He helps Geralt undress--gods, and Geralt's prick is even smaller, somehow--before directing him to his knees between his brothers.

Jaskier practically vibrates with eagerness.

He meant only to take a little, but now he thinks he'll have all of it, and then some for dessert, until he's bursting with it.

Gods, the possibilities are endless.

Jaskier makes himself comfortable, leaning back on the cushions, facing his obedient pups.

"My good boys. My darling, perfect pups. You're even more breathtaking than I could ever imagine."

Someone whines pitifully at the words.

"Oh, it's high time someone took care of you, isn't it? Look how wet your gorgeous cocks are getting, and I barely even touched you."

He wants to touch, but even more he wants to watch.

"Eskel, my lovely, why don't you lay down for me? That's it, heart. Open your mouth nice and wide--"

Jaskier looks on, transfixed, as his pups shuffle to accommodate his wants; Eskel on his back on the furs, Lambert straddling his face, cute prick hovering just above his parted lips. He's got Geralt on his belly, face buried between Eskel's legs.

"My, look at you. Go on, dears, you must be ravenous."

He can't settle on where to look--to watch clumsy tongues lap desperately at each other's cocks, or their faces twist in unadulterated pleasure. Just as he fixes his wandering gaze on where Lambert's got his lip between his teeth, he catches a glimpse of Geralt rutting his tiny prick against the edge of the fur.

He waits until he can just feel the static of release cloying the air, all his pups whimpering as they approach the precipice--and orders them apart. They kneel again, their chests heaving and cocks throbbing, clad only in their medallions.

"What would my pups want? Do you want to fingerfuck your needy holes, since none of you have a cock to do it? I'll give you something bigger, when you're all nice and loose."

"Please," Geralt says quietly and crawls up the bed. He comes to straddle one of Jaskier's thighs, his prick flushed a delightful pink, deliciously wet at the head, and Jaskier's sure greater men would have succumbed.

"Oh, is my puppy desperate?"

Geralt nods frantically as he rides Jaskier's thigh, spreading sticky precome all over the fabric of his trousers.

"You'll have to wait your turn to get bred full, then, heart, since your brothers are so patient."

He brushes Geralt's hair to the side and shivers when Geralt comes with a series of lovely, high-pitched moans, feeling the shadow of his pup's release at the base of his spine.

"Good boy. But you're so greedy, darling, you've left your brothers waiting. Better make it up to them, yeah?"

Geralt nods again and scrambles off the bed to push at Eskel's chest and get him to lay back down again. This time Geralt throws Eskel's legs over his shoulders and laps hungrily at his hole. Jaskier makes Lambert return to sit on Eskel's face, turned the other way as he rides Eskel's tongue and moans wantonly.

They both take a finger beautifully, even before Jaskier hands them the oil.

Gods, Jaskier has to palm his own cock when he thinks about his pups, made-over and trained to be killing machines--helpless as he forces them to take their pleasure, squirming on each other's fingers and tongues, moaning and whimpering and begging in broken, breathy whispers to be taken and bred and filled.

He watches Eskel stretched on three fingers, his powerful thighs quivering. Jaskier feels the frantic crescendo of his pup's orgasm, can taste the panic that rises in him because he didn't get the permission to come yet.

"Do you like Geralt's fingers, darling? Want to come on them? Go on, Eskel, my lovely, let go for me."

Eskel's little cock twitches before he comes with a sob, draining his heavy balls all over his belly, but he never stops driving his fingers relentlessly into Lambert's slack hole.

"You too, Lambert, baby, come for me whenever you feel like it. Look how good it was for your brothers."

Lambert only takes a few more harsh thrusts before he nearly collapses forward, seizing up and shooting his load over Eskel's chest with a full-bodied tremor.

"Good. Gods, you're all so good, so lovely, you make my heart ache."

They make other parts of him ache, too.

When Geralt moves up to dutifully clean Eskel's skin of seed, from his flushed chest all the way to his sensitive cock, Jaskier's resolve breaks.

He divests himself quickly of his clothes, and his pups stare adoringly, hungrily, at the sticky-wet tip of his cock.

And Jaskier immediately knows that he loves all of them equally--but he needs Geralt to have the last turn, and he's wanted Eskel ever since he'd first laid eyes on him that first day.

"You can all come up on the bed now, loves."

His pups drool all over themselves, watching his prick bob between his legs, and Jaskier can't believe they were to deprive themselves all winter, when they so fiercely want for a big fat cock to stuff them silly. His heart breaks for them, just a little.

He kisses Lambert deeply, his darling too out of it to do it properly, licking into Jaskier's mouth with a sloppy tongue like the desperate puppy he is. They all try to get comfortable around him, even with the aching emptiness between their legs, but Jaskier's quick to remedy that.

"Lambert, my sweet, be a dear and open Geralt up while I breed Eskel's tight little hole."

Jaskier reclines with his back against the wall, so he can see Geralt open his legs wantonly and Lambert quickly get between them.

But most importantly, he can urge Eskel onto his lap, his pup's glorious thighs spreading wide over his own as he looks at Jaskier with blind adoration.

"You want my cock, darling? Want to finally be so very full?" Jaskier asks in a whisper, giving Eskel his full attention, like his baby deserves.

"Please, please." Eskel's soothing, deep voice trembles a bit as he tries to speak. "Want you so bad, it hurts."

Jaskier shushes him before pressing his lips gently to Eskel's. The kiss is more cohesive than his last, Eskel groaning quietly when Jaskier sucks on his tongue.

"I know, you just want to get fucked, nice and proper, huh? I bet you get no relief on the path, with that pitiful little excuse for a cock--want me to breed you like the good little fuckhole you are, darling? I'll leave you dripping."

He smooths his hands over Eskel's thighs to urge him up, so he can press his throbbing cockhead against Eskel's greedy hole. It swallows him all at once, steals the breath from his lungs when Eskel's bottom presses against the tops of his legs.

"Oh, Eskel, my love--" Jaskier rambles, because the feel of his pup, coupled with the sight he makes--wide open eyes, glazed-over in elation, his lips swollen and pink, his tiny prick hard again and bobbing against his belly when Eskel begins bouncing on Jaskier's cock--

Gods, how did he ever think he could have just a little?

"Take what you need, whatever you need, darling, oh, you're divine, you're perfect."

Eskel whimpers and leans in to bury his face in Jaskier's neck, overwhelmed, but Jaskier doesn't mind. He rubs his puppy's back, and keeps fucking him, as slowly and as quickly as Eskel needs from him, sinking into his sinful hole again and again until Eskel shakes with it, until he can't go anymore.

Jaskier pushes him gently onto his back and keeps driving into him, faster now, and Eskel sobs beautifully with each thrust. They share a feverish kiss and Jaskier finally gets his hands on that alluring chest, squeezing Eskel's pecks and rubbing his nipples gently. Eskel arches into his touch and moans raggedly.

"Such a good boy, such a good pup--do you want me to touch your cute prick, love? Want me to rub your little clit?"

Eskel nods, his voice climbing frantically around a string of yes yes yes. It barely takes a full touch to his swollen, ruddy prick before Eskel pulses around Jaskier's cock, thrashes on the bed with his head thrown back.

"Stunning, oh, that's perfect--"

Jaskier pumps his darling pup full of hot seed and marvels when Eskel immediately quakes through another orgasm, before the first even subsides. Jaskier peppers his face with tiny kisses, wants to drown Eskel in affection. When he makes to pull out, Eskel whines and claws at his shoulders.

"I know, I know, pup, but I need to see to your brothers. Gods, I wish I had something to plug you up with, so you're always nice and full."

He does manage to pull out, and gets to watch Eskel's puffy hole leak out his spend copiously. He leans down to lap it up, because how can he not? Eskel's legs grip vice-tight around his head for a moment.

Eskel's still convulsing periodically when Jaskier arranges him on his knees, straddling one of Geralt's thighs, so they can hump each other like the needy pups they are.

"Lambert, love, would you like to suck a real cock, finally? I can shove it down your throat before I breed your lovely hole."

And Lambert scrambles to get his mouth on Jaskier's come-streaked cock so fast he nearly falls backwards and off the edge of the bed.

"Careful, dear, so you don't choke. Gods, you are just my perfect cock-hungry sluts, aren't you? How will I ever let you go?"

Geralt whimpers beautifully next to him, and Jaskier looks over to his other boys while he cards gentle fingers through Lambert's hair.

Eskel's too sensitive, Jaskier knows, and yet he still ruts his prick against Geralt like he'll die without it. Their foreheads rest together. It only takes the smallest nudge to have them kiss, tentatively at first, then increasingly more hotly, until they're both moaning with the intensity of it.

"Is this how my pups spend the winters? Rutting against each other desperately, lapping at your pathetic little pricks like they're cunts? Writhing on fingers because there isn't a cock in sight to fill you like you so very crave?"

Geralt shakes violently and grabs fistfuls of Eskel's hair when he spills, yet the rhythm of his hips never falters. Jaskier smiles at them warmly, tugs Lambert's head up and down, relishing the tight clutch of his throat.

Except there's something threatening to ruin his perfect evening, and he can feel one of his pups slipping from his thrall.

Eskel jerks away slightly, as much as he can with Geralt still straddling his leg. His eyes aren't filled with bliss and lust, but wide with confusion and, inexplicably, terror.

"You--" Eskel begins, trying to wrestle out of Geralt's hold.

Jaskier shushes him calmly. "Oh, darling is something the matter? You do like being my lovely pup, don't you?" He can see Eskel pause when he no doubt notices his sopping wet hole drooling all over the sheets. "Don't you like your little boy parts touched, love? Doesn't it feel good to be stuffed with my seed?"

Eskel's sharp, golden eyes quickly lose their focus. Geralt whines and leans in for a kiss. Eskel opens his mouth somewhat reluctantly, still.

"That's it, pup, just let yourself be cared for, isn't that better? If you're good I'll have you warm my cock all night."

Jaskier still has some tricks up his sleeve, so he snaps his fingers and has Eskel crashing through a sudden, dry orgasm, his lovely prick throbbing visibly.

"Maybe it's for the better you don't have real cocks. I can have your little boy pricks coming again and again, just as a woman would."

Lambert gives a strangled groan around Jaskier's cock, his release thick and heavy in the air without anyone even glancing at his dick. Amazing.

Jaskier urges his lovely pup up, gives him a chaste kiss before asking,

"How do you want it, darling?"

"Hard," Lambert replies without hesitation, and settles on his hands and knees, his pink, sloppy hole perfectly on display.

Jaskier urges Eskel and Geralt to lay down, grind their oversensitive, aching pricks against each other. Their whimpers are a beautiful background for the slow, dizzying push of his cock into Lambert's tight body.

"Oh, love, you've got such a nice, tight cunt, fuck--"

Lambert chokes on a breath, forces his hips back, overeager and hungry for every bit of cock he can get. Jaskier couldn't deny him, wouldn't want to anyway.

"That's it, that's right, I'll fuck you until you can't stand it anymore, darling, you'll be feeling it for days."

His hips hasten, until he's snapping into Lambert with brutal force, jostling the whole bed, spurred on by the constant babble of more, harder, yes, yes.

"Will you finger your sore hole, thinking about my cock? Will you try to get Eskel's tiny prick into you, to satisfy the ache?"

Lambert keens, and shakes his head vigorously.

"Just you, need your cock, need a real cock--"

The slap of Jaskier's balls against Lambert's is indecently satisfying. Jaskier brings his hand down with a crack on Lambert's magnificent arse, and then a few more times, when Lambert hollers and the sharp scent of his intensifying arousal makes Jaskier half-rabid.

"Like that, darling? Want to be abused? Want me to bruise your little cunt until you sob with it?"

"Please, please, oh--"

Sobbing is not far off, it seems. Jaskier feels the tingle of power in every part of his body, in the air around them, everywhere, everywhere, raw carnal energy for him to devour.

Jaskier comes before Lambert does, but his pup isn't far behind, milking the last of Jaskier's release as he spills onto the sheets with a broken whimper.

"Don't stop, don't stop," Lambert whispers and tries to impale himself on Jaskier's cock further.

"Greedy. Greedy, slutty pups, you've been neglected for so long, you can't get enough, can you?"

He thrusts languidly, because if there's one thing he doesn't lack, it's stamina.

They fuck for long minutes, Lambert steadily growing louder in his pleas and his moans, Jaskier sweaty and out of breath trying to keep his darling satisfied. Each thrust fucks his seed deeper into Lambert with a wet squelching sound that makes Jaskier dizzy in its obscenity. Which is perhaps why he pulls out of Lambert entirely and rolls his pup to lay belly-up before him.

"How would you like to come inside a nice, warm body, love?"

Lambert whines, his golden eyes blown entirely black.

"Geralt, my darling," Jaskier calls softly, and Geralt looks up at him with red-rimmed, shining eyes. "You'll be a good pup and ride Lambert, won't you?"

"Want a real cock," Geralt says faintly, voice cracking, but he's already climbing to sit astride Lambert's belly, facing Jaskier. "Want your cock."

"You'll get it, heart, you'll get it as much as you want--if you're a good boy for me."

Jaskier doesn't think Lambert's cock is longer than his fingers, but it's nice and thick and just big enough to fit inside Geralt without slipping out, at least until Geralt tries to fuck himself on it.

"Jaskier, Jaskier, please--" his pups call out to him, all three in a beautiful symphony.

He's suddenly obsessed with the thought of Lambert coming inside Geralt, so when Jaskier gets in him his hole is nice and sloppy with spend.

Lambert's cute little prick is not big enough for Geralt to bounce on it like he so clearly wants.

Easily remedied, that.

"Geralt. Geralt, my darling, the light of my life, my perfect little puppy--" he prattles on in a soft voice before he gives a measured slap to the very tip of Geralt's cock.

The effect is immediate. Geralt sobs, just the tiniest bit, tightens around Lambert like the most amazing little boy, until Lambert writhes and comes with a scorching hot shout of someone getting to breed a warm hole for the first time in a long time.

Jaskier is dizzy with all this power, lust-drunk and floaty. He can barely contain it. He has to be careful, usually, when it gets this intense, but his perfect pups can take it, were made to take it, gods, gods--

A sharp burst of energy makes his witchers all shudder with release, squirming as it takes them by surprise, their little cocks come-soaked and oversensitive.

"Geralt," Jaskier says, and he slurs a bit in his haste. His composure is slipping. But his boys are so delicious, so eager and obedient and Geralt spreads his legs so very wide just to show Jaskier his loose, fucked-out hole, and what is he meant to do if not give in to the temptation laid out before him?

Geralt feels so intoxicatingly, unreasonably good, the spell nearly snaps. Jaskier has to keep himself firmly in check, even when everything around him becomes an impossible blur. He fucks Geralt on his back and his stomach, on all fours and against the wall. Vaguely, he registers the small tingle in his abdomen when his other pups come, too, again and again on each other's fingers and tongues, wailing and screaming as Jaskier unconsciously wrings pleasure out of them long after it'd crossed the line of overstimulated pain.

"Geralt, my lovely, my darling little whore, fuck--you're all so good, so, so good, ah--"

His pup's tiny fucking prick twitches when Jaskier closes a palm around it, finds it deliciously soaked and so very sensitive. He licks the single tear that spills down Geralt's cheek and rubs the heel of his palm over Geralt’s cockhead.

Jaskier blacks out when he finally breeds Geralt full of come.

***

He wakes up wrapped up in his beloved pups, keeping his hold tightly on their minds.

The room had grown cold, but he's feverishly hot between three strong bodies. Curious, he touches a finger to the swollen head of Lambert's soft prick, watches him twitch his hips away even asleep. Jaskier pillows his head on a burly chest and closes his eyes.

He'll let them rest for the day, but by nightfall, Jaskier would very much like to be treated to an extravagant feast again.

[sickficsforthesoul]

ok but imagine: the sicke is sick (shocking!) but they have to go outside to get medicine for there stomach bug. luckily their best friend/s/o helps them get it. but yk they dk which to get, and they had the bug for nearly a week so they had to come. while walking their they felt like vomiting. luckily they had plastic bags . but they didnt close their bag properly so the bags flew out . so they dont have amy more. they just ignored it , thinking they were just so used to that feeling they were just imagining it.they continued walking ,the place they were walking was kinda busy.uh how much they hated ppl. they started to feel their vomit coming, they asked ;; h-hey (their best friend/ s/o) I dont feel to good.. I might throw up.. their s/o or best friend quickly finding a quiet place or a place with no ppl. they found 1 . helping the sickie walk their and asking if they have their bags. they said 'no. I l-lost them them' starting a coughing fit. their friend or s/o searched their bag for anything yo hold their vomit. all of a sudden they heard them throw up. some people(3) passing by saw it . and just watched. uh they hated ppl looking. their caretaker rubbing their back as they throw up. after 4 minutes of pain , the ppl watching left. the sickie stood up and just put their body weight on the caretaker. they just wanted to sleep but noo they had to get medicine. 'can we go home.t-too many ppl watching , I hate this' the caretaker laughed awkwardly. 'ik you hate this but we need to get medicine. or else you wont get better.' 'uh fine.' why dont we just take the bus there? 'are you crazy do you want me 2 vomit there??' 'theres a convince store near. we can get some plastic bags and sore throat candies. and water.' the sickie didnt answer. just hugged the caretaker arm to stop them from falling. after getting the stuff they waited for the bus. pt 1 end - ¿ ¡ ૮₍ 𖦹 ˕ ×` ₎ა ! ? /🧛🏻‍♀️

while waiting they double bagged the plastic bags to prevent in from seeping thru. one the bus came. the sickie regretted going on already feeling dizzy once they sat down , they sat at the back where no1 sits (although that would make them more dizzer, but they didnt know that) after 5 minutes of the ride (there was some traffic. normally itd take 10 minutes. but since there is traffic they didnt how long they'd have to wait.) "[caretakers name]...while wet coughing.mm candy." they rushed to give the candy. it soothed their throat for 5 minutes until making them dizzy . lying down on the caretaker,while they play with their hair. they fell asleep. after 20 minutes (still in traffic) they woke up to the bus driving. they woke up and asked for water. they drank the water in small sips. they didnt vomit. the they drank it quickly before spitting it out. then coughing. they nearly threw up. swallowing it . asking while coughing for the 'bag'. they grabbed it and held on it and tried getting it out bc they were very nauseous. they couldn't. until the bus continued moving. they're grip to it was very weak. the bus suddenly moving made their stomach growl. and letting of their bag to hold on their stomach. the care taker asked "what's wrong ???? you let go... r u gonna ..." "no. stop.u will make me.stop.talking abt it"(they hated vomit so much thinking abt it makes them gag) the sickie was shaking. they messed up dropping the bag and it flew away. they caretaker getting their jacket just incase yk they vomit. after the bus stops again. a couple and a 2 ppl (4 alltogether)decided to sit in the back. their stomach hurts so much... they started crying. the bus started moving more . 2 more stops till their stop. they gagged. letting go of their hand on their face. "I'm gonna-" the caretaker getting the jacket and hugging the sickie to cover them . they threw up on the caretaker. the couple moved away in disgust whilst the 2 other ppl stayed. just on their phone. "ppl r looking...." "I want to leave.. " "''dont worry , no1 is looking'' the care taker grabbed their bag looking for a (idk the word but it's like a towel but not , you stick it on some1 face and it cools them down) they place it on the sickie. they sickie just dry heaving at this point. they said "sorry.." it's ok. - ¿ ¡ ૮₍ 𖦹 ˕ ×` ₎ა ! ? / 🧛🏻‍♀️ , which haikyuu character do you think this is? also very bad prompt :). again,not a request.

I think the word you want is cold compress? As for the sickie of this situation, I'm thinking Kageyama and the Seijoh Four (Oikawa, Iwaizumi, Kumini, and Kindaichi, btw) would be fun with Kageyama as the sickie. Maybe Kageyama got sick suddenly while hanging out with them, and they reluctantly take care of him because they agreed to lunch, not nursing Kageyama back to health. Then you get the reluctant caretaking trope in there too, which is great in situations like this.

Adding the Seijoh Four also means that you can have different types of caretakers all in one scenario. For example, Kindaichi is a terrible caretaker. He panics and makes things worse instead of better. On the other hand, Iwaizumi is a great caretaker from caring for Oikawa whenever he does something stupid. Oikawa and Kunimi are somewhere in the middle. I think they'll just try to stay calm and do whatever Iwaizumi tells them too for the most part. Oikawa probably does more because Kunimi also has to calm Kindaichi down too.

And then we have Kageyama, who's super embarrassed that the others have to take care of him. Kageyama hates telling his team when he's sick, so having people from another team caring for him is mortifying for him. On top of being embarrassed, Kageyama is also really sick, and his guilt and embarrassment make him feel so much worse than he normally would. Put this all together, and you basically have the formula for one of my favorite sickfic styles. What do you guys think? Do you agree with me?

[softstraykidsimagines]

Boyfriend!Hyunjin

A/N: SHE PROTECC

SHE ATTACC

BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY

SHE BACC

HI GUYS!!! I’m so happy to be posting again i cry :,)  i hope you enjoy!!!! i;ll be updating as much as i can without rushing too much :D

MASTERLIST

Prepare your wigs peeps

This is gonna make me swerve

I mean

cmon it’s Hyunjin

Let’s do this!

Prince Hyunjin

Is actually smooth af with his crush

He'll complement you whenever he gets the chance

Or gives you food

Basically your knight in shining armor

Ye, that’s not what actually happens

He's smiling like an idiot and about collapse when he’s with you because HE'S FREAKING OUT OK

So freaking nervous his heartbeat is always up when he’s with you

You sometimes think he’s about to have a heart attack and you’re not stupid you know why lmao

Same for when he confesses

At first he’s pretty calm about it

Just casually asked if you wanted to see a movie with him some time

“Like... a-as more than friends?”

You'd kinda expected it so you weren't too shocked when he asked you

So you said yes

Duh

And he does a double take

"Wait.... Are you serious? You want to?"

"Well yeah?"

"WHAT WHY"

Was good with flirting but didn't actually think you'd go out with him smh

Now every minute he just contemplates the fact that he has you

And he still can't believe it

Like shit dude

He’s with the y/n

You never feel unloved when you're with him

He loves going for long walks, just to talk and relax

Why does it sound like he's a dog here lmao

Will always take as many pictures of you as his phone storage will allow, his camera roll is stuffed with pics of you

Will insist on going to the park for a picnic, he just loves you and the sunshine

He loves to quietly slide your hand into his

But he always ends up giggling because he’s so giddy about being with you

Has to take a moment to charge up his courage before giving you a quick kiss on the cheek

He then goes an unreal shade of scarlet as he covers his face, muttering that he ‘can’t believe that he actually did it’! 

It takes him a while to finally gather up the courage to properly kiss you

Like.... a very long time

You were starting to get worried that he didn’t actually like you

Maybe he was just too nervous to tell you that it wasn’t working for him

buT NOPE

On one certain date, Hyunjin had prepared a cute little dinner on the practice room floor

He was so apologetic about the poor setting, but finally had stopped saying sorry when you’d told him for the 2376129th time that you were having fun

At some point, he just went uber silent, watching you not in a creepy way

You eventually noticed, and just stared back

“What?”

He didn’t say anything, but his eyes did widen a wee bit

“What are you lookin at, you’re sorta scaring m-”

He cut you off and just kissed you

BOI YOU WERE SO SHOCKED

Afterwards you both just stared at each other

And then Hyunjin goes all red

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to do that I’m sorry that was stupid you can slap me if you want!!!!”

“Bruh why would I want to slap you?!”

“You don’t hate me?”

facepalms for days

You meet the other boys only a few minutes later

Go figure

You’re talking casually, the embarrassment from the kiss wearing off

They all come stampeding into the practice room making an ungodly racket

And all go quiet when they realize what they’ve done

Changbin, bless him, tries to reduce the awful level of awkwardness: “*cough* uh hey, Hyunjin.... This must be y/n right?” He waves at you. “We’ve heard a lot about you, Hyunjin never stops talking about you”

He misses the death glare Hyunjin shoots him

Then Jisung

Freakin Jisung, man

Waltzes up: “Hyunjin’s cheeks are really pink”. He gives a cheeky smile. “You didn’t kiss did you?”

The room goes as quiet as a tomb

“OH SHIT YOU DIDN’T ACTUALLY KISS DID YOU????”

Of course Hyunjin completely loses his shit at the sight of you turning a deep red. “GODDAMMIT JISUNG STFU”

Ye your first meeting with SKZ wasn’t the best

But you all bonded rather quickly after

And Jisung buys you little snacks sometimes as an apology for your first awkward meeting

OH GOD THE BOYS ADORE YOU

If you’re ever sick, they always get snacks for Hyunjin to give you

And if you’re really under the weather, they’ll cover for Hyunjin so that he can stay with you and take care of you.

He wraps you in blankets

YOU ARE NOW A BURRITO

And tries to make soup for you

We know what cooking!Hyunjin leads to

You’re chilling on the couch and you suddenly hear a high-pitched scream

You’re up and sprinting to the kitchen at the speed of light still wrapped in a burrito

To find him fanning at a smoking pot

“WHAT THE FUCK HYUNJIN YOU JUST NEED TO HEAT IT UP HOW DID YOU START A MINI FIRE?”

You’re home doesn’t burn down thank goodness

And you end up heating some soup for yourself while Hyunjin watches

And it’s! hilarious! when he’s sick!

He becomes a little ten-year-old istg

But in a really cute way

He doesn’t ask for anything: food, to watch TV etc

Nah he just wants cuddles

The whole damn day

So while you’re struggling to keep a mask on and not getting sneezed on, this idiot is smiling like a puppy if puppies could smile, clinging onto you like a love-filled leach did that sound weird? i think that sounded really weird

i want this tattooed on my face thx

Now idk what this dude is afraid of

Something tells me one big fear would be to lose Stray Kids and the people he loves

And so I think he’d get kinda nervous when you both see less of each other and when he gets busier

You can’t talk as much because of his crazy schedule and with lack of sleep, he starts getting more irritated easier during the little intervals of time you get to see each other

At some point he might snap at you, maybe for no reason at all, and you’ll snap back indignantly

Yeah you love him but you’re not taking any attitude

If things get really bad, he just shakes his head, saying he needs some air

You’ll both give yourselves some space, but eventually Hyunjin becomes terrified that you’re too angry with him to talk again

So he goes to find you and talk

You both hug it out and decide to spent the rest of the day together for more quality time

And it’s totally worth Hyunjin getting an earful from Chan the next day

OK back to fluff quickly quickly

On the days Hyunjin goes somewhere, you sometimes join him in the car ride, tho you’re always super careful to never show your face when he gets out

Gotta stay hidden yknow?

You’ll both send cute little texts throughout the day and OOF just couple goals

You: hey check this out, this is me 2 u *sends heart meme*

Jiiniie<3: oh yeah? well this is me @ u! *sends heart meme with more hearts*

You: boi dont start smth u cant win!

And thus begins the heart meme wars

r they even called heart memes idk

i want this tattooed on my face pt2

We’ve already established that Hyunjin can’t cook for love or money

So if he even steps foot in the dorms’ kitchen

You bet that at least two other of his hyungs will follow for pure supervision

And he is not, under any circumstances, allowed to cook something by himself

And you’re grateful that your safety and world peace had been assured by this rule

Although, you’re allowed to cook together as long as you watch what he’s doing

If anything at all goes wrong, the blame is pinned on you

So it’s natural for you to treat these cooking projects as once-in-a-while occasions

Now when you ask about meeting his parents

Holy Hell

Stutters, clammy hands, flitting eyes, you name it

Hyunjin is so frickin nervous about you meeting his parents oof

You don’t understand why, like hey, how bad could it be right?

But pretty soon you get why Jinnie was nervous

His parents aren’t that trusting within the first hour of knowing you

You guess it might be because of poor past experiences?

Maybe Hyunjin had been judged or dated once too many times just for his looks?

The thought is enough to make you swear by all you know to always treat him like a treasure

You also make a mental note to ask him sometime

Eventually, his parents realize you have pure intentions and they become so much kinder and warmer

They let you know how welcome you are to visit whenever you want, they offer to send you off with some homemade cookies...

And Hyunjin gets so emotional at the beautiful site in front of him that he bursts into tears

Which causes you and his parents to tease and hug him

if you’re thick, let’s just be clear that im making a statement on how you should NOT judge Jinnie purely because he’s good looking, appreciate his talent!

Now, Hyunjin is kinda tall compared to the rest of SKZ hah im joking of course so it’s pure instinct to want to steal his shirts

Don’t lie, if you had the chance, you would take something i see right thru u

And at some point in your life, you stop realizing ‘hey, this isn’t my jumper!’ and just walk around in clothes that aren’t yours

And when this happens, three things follow:

You see a wild Hyunjin crashing through the apartment towards you, yelling happily that ‘that’s my favorite hoodie!!’ he tries to act like he’s angry and fails in 0.0000003 sec

He doesn’t slow down and freakin slams into you at full velocity, knocking you over or off anything you might be sitting on

He proceeds to tickle you mercilessly, until you either can’t breath and turn purple or until you commit an extreme act of violence in the name of self defense

Once this chaotic episode ends, most of the time with both of you are completely knackered and just lying on the floor

You both cool off by just cuddling and watching something on TV

Or reading something together!!!

I can totally see Hyunjin shoving one of his fav books in your face and insisting that you both take turns in reading aloud to each other

And you both react at the same time to shockers in the book, like you start crying together when a character dies who hasn’t had that traumatic experience or you both squeal with joy and hug each other tighter when something great happens

Did I just turn into a puddle of happy goo?

Yes I fuckin did.

I think Hyunjin wouldn’t take that long to tell you that he loves you

That doesn’t mean that he planned anything tho

HAH! Course he didn’t

Probs says it when he can barely think straight

Maybe you’re watching him dance late at night

You’d brought snacks to keep him going ‘cause he was working his ass off

And there you sit, marveling at his skill and fluidity while executing his choreo

You have a talent for hyping Hyunjin up while he dances, cheering when he leaps high into the air, gasping when he performs a complicated move, and aw-ing and his graceful poses ok im done now

When he finishes one of his more dramatic dances, you jump up with glee and tackle him in a hug despite him being sweaty, saying how proud you are

He hugs you back happily and says:

“I should be the proud one, having someone I love so much being so supportive of me”.

You both freeze, still hugging each other

And neither of you move or breathe for a moment

“What did you say?”

“UhhhHHHH NOTHING I SAID NOTHING”

“You said that you love me!”

“WAT NO I DIDN’T I-”

“HYUNJIN I LOVE YOU TOO!!!!”

“N- wait what?”

“I love you, dumbass” same tho

Oof that poor practice room has seen a lot of awkwardness

I’m cracking up just by thinking of how hopeless Hyunjin could become when SKZ are away

“Hey do you guys have a signal and/or data? I wanna Skype y/n and show them the beautiful view”.

*all of SKZ facepalms*

Always taking pictures to show you

In the evenings, you get a frickin cascade of notifications of both photos and messages from the poor boy telling you he misses you like crazy

When Skyping, he asks to see Khami, who you have the pleasure of caring for during his absence

You do question (mentally and then verbally) whether he calls to talk to you or his dog

He never answers the question heh

There’s lowkey a competition between you and Khami for Hyunjin’s affection

When the boys make their flight home, Hyunjin keeps you informed about everything that’s happening

I mean everything:

Jiiniie<3: we’re @ the airport :D     -6h ago

Jiiniie<3: waiting to board!     -5h ago

Jiiniie<3: they’re getting ready to go, i can’t wait to see you!! xxx      -5h ago

Jiiniie<3: will text you when we arrive, love!     -5h ago

Jiiniie<3: JUST LANDED! CANT WAIT TO HUG U     -31mins ago

Jiiniie<3: about to get our luggage!     -Just now

You get the point -_-

When you finally see each other, he runs at top speed to pick you up and spins you around

frickin goals man i feel so sad writing this :,)

He goes public in probably the most aesthetic way that’s physically possible

He posts a bunch of gorgeous photos-

Courtesy of Jisung

-of your silhouettes in front of sunsets

-Pics he took of you laughing during a cafe trip

-Bomb-ass selcas where you’re both lookin hella fine

Just

UGGHHH

SO! AESTHETIC!!!

Naturally, the internet freaks the fuck out

Both of you are kinda nervous about the explosive reaction

There are salty bitches who are telling you to piss off because they jelly

But the huge majority of Stay are crying with happiness and wishing you both well

this better happen in the future im watching all of u

And soon Hyunjin is talking about you on vLives, proud af because y/n freakin rules!

OhmyGod I love Hyunjin

Damn my heart be like < HYUNJIN 3 phew

[loserholland]

𝐄𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐞

𝟎𝟏𝟒 ➺ 𝐇𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐢𝐞𝐫

Pairing ➺  Ceo playboy!Ben Hardy x Reader

Warning ➺ flashbacks and sad benny boy ):

Word Count ➺ 2,428

Summary ➺ An arranged marriage between two polar opposites.

A/N ➺ Two more chapters and the series will be complete! I will be doing a thank you/q&a video once I’m done writing the series, so if you have questions please send them in! They don’t have to be Elite related questions!

Send me your thoughts, feelings, everything! It makes me day/night!

Also send me your theories! Love reading them! TEEHEHHEH

✿ 𝓟𝓮𝓻𝓶𝓪𝓷𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝓣𝓪𝓰𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽 ✿ -  @hollandfieldblurbs , @beerbottlesandchainsaws @killerqueen-gunpowdergelatine​, @spideyyypeter

❁ 𝐄𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐓𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ❁ - @financialinstability, @magicwithaknife , @xrumkugelx , @rogertaylorsblondhair, @virtualsheepeat, @hollyissuchahoe , @yourkindabrainy-ilikeit, @fsociety00da1, @lee-519 , @2ptonpt, @sherlokiantheatrenerd , @local-radical-bandit , @calumfornicationx , @softcillian, @kittysblog14 , @peach-barnes , @prettyoddbarnes  , @spideyyypeter, @adepressedstudentslife , @wowza-bowza , @stilesneedsprotection , @anamcg317 , @indescribxbl , @heinz-doofenshmirtz-official , @loveofmylifeben , @captainxmoony , @whateverbakesyourcake , @waving-thru-a-window , @benhrdy , @beerbottlesandchainsaws , @frietjemeloen , @kirket03 , @emmieliabedelia , @sabbrriiinnaa , @justinemayi , @bummmblebeee , @wolverinesbeer , @allieburakovsky , @chocolatekisses8 @i-the-fangirl, @secretsweetscollectionblog, @ksqueenie

☞  Masterlist  ☜

"𝚃𝚘𝚍𝚊𝚢, 𝙸 𝚌𝚕𝚘𝚜𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚍𝚘𝚘𝚛 𝚝𝚘 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚙𝚊𝚜𝚝. 𝙾𝚙𝚎𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚍𝚘𝚘𝚛 𝚝𝚘 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚏𝚞𝚝𝚞𝚛𝚎, 𝚝𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚊 𝚍𝚎𝚎𝚙 𝚋𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚑 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚙 𝚘𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑 𝚝𝚘 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚒𝚗 𝚖𝚢 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎."

Two Years.

Two wonderful, eventful years.

Filled with heartbreak and sorrow, forgiveness and life lessons. Two years since she last saw Ben, two years since Presley apologized and well since her father apologized. She was able to forgive one out of the three people, that’s a given. She was happy, the business was better than ever and well she was doing so much better letting go of the past.

Ben however, the past two years passed by ever so slowly. He dreaded everyday, he missed flying to New York in July spending half the rest of his year in sunny humid New York with his lover. Alexa had taken the responsibility to keep the company afloat, all the meetings Ben would dismiss she’d sit through and the papers that were suppose to be signed by Ben, she’d have to sign it.

It was safe to say Alexa was beyond annoyed with her son’s behavior, yes she pitted him, but she also knew it was his fault, it was his choice that made him lose (Y/N). The one girl she truly thought could bring her son happiness, instead he brought her pain and sadness. He has all the rights to mop and hide out in the lonely house that would once be his and (Y/N) house, but it’s been two years and he still hasn’t fully recovered.

“Benjamin, you need to get back to work.” Alexa moved around the master bedroom collecting the empty beer bottles into a garbage bag along with empty cigarette cartons that were scattered around the dark room.

Ben stared blankly at his mother sighing lightly as the sound of glass clinked together echoed through the room, “I’ll come back when I want to.” his mother dropped the bag filled with bottles and cartons turning around to glare at her son who sat against the headboard of his bed.

“Alright young man, listen to me. You broke her heart. It was the choice you made that made things end up this way, think about it. You and (Y/N) could be celebrating your two year anniversary! Yet here we are.”

She didn’t want to hurt her son’s feelings, she didn’t want to add on to the sadness he felt but it had to be said and done. He needed to collect himself and move onto the next chapter in his life.

“Listen to me Benjamin, if two people are meant to be together eventually they’ll find their way back. If (Y/N) finds her way back to you, don’t take it for granted.”

It would be a lie to say he never went back to New York in the past two years, he wanted to go to her office, he wanted to see her and apologize yet he never found the courage to do it. He’d just sit in his car as his chauffeur would question if this is the right place and all Ben would say is “Bring me back to the hotel.”

He thought if he didn’t show up, she’d be happier. Her life would be simpler. All he wanted was for her to be happy, even if that meant finding someone else.

(Y/N) slipped her coat on and grabbed her phone and wallet, wanting nothing more than a walk around central park after such a hectic day at the office, a busy morning with back to back meetings, stacks of papers to go over and sign.

It’s been a while since she could find time to go for a small walk to relief the stress she felt, the park was a bit empty and quiet no one wanted to walk around the in the cold weather. She took a deep breath in and out continuing along the path admiring the trees that were kissed with freshly fallen snow, the satisfying crunch the snow made once the sole of her boot came in contact with the sheet of white.

“It’s so beautiful, calming isn’t it?” (Y/N) looked up at Ben taking the beanie that hid his blond hair and placed it on her head, he pouted slightly wanting it back to keep his head warm “Hey! You have a hood on your jacket!” she stepped back standing a few feet away from her fiancée. 

It was a few days away from New year’s eve, central park was empty the streets of New York filled with yelling and honking. She reached down taking some snow and shaped it into a sphere before throwing it at Ben who stood there stunned for a moment before taking some snow into his hands. 

“So that’s how you’re gonna play, alright.”

She smiled at the warm memory, it’s been so long since she’s heard from him. There were times when she laid in bed at night her thumb hovered over his contact unsure if she should call him or just go to bed. There were nights when all she wanted was to be in his arms, she wanted him to be there when she got home after such a long day. She missed him. She missed everything about him, there was no denying the fact that after two years her life still felt so what incomplete. 

Before she headed back to the office, she stopped by a small cafe for a cup of hot chocolate perfect way to end her little break. The cafe she was headed too held many memories she shared with Ben, le petit cafe. Ben would talk about how they’d start their honeymoon off in Paris then go to Tahiti or Bora Bora, if only there was a time machine to go back to that day and to just live through it again. 

“You know a little french right?” Ben questioned as he held his mug of hot chocolate waiting for it to cool down as he admired the woman who sat across him, the woman who held many talents and intelligence. He hoped that their kids would have her smarts and looks.

“Oui, pourqoui?” (Y/N) answered, she knew more than a little french. She had been learning the language since she was in elementary wanting nothing more than to go to Paris and live like the Parisians, one day she hoped when she retires and her kids have left the nest she’d buy a house in Paris. 

Ben sipped on his hot chocolate the whip cream made a small mustache causing (Y/N) stifle back her laugh, “You are such a child Benjamin Hardy.” she shook her head lightly as he leaned forward with his lips puckered “Hm, maybe our kids will have my attitude and they’ll have your smarts and beauty.” ah kids, they never really had a conversation about kids. She’d love to have them.

“Well, we should get going. I wanna get some chinese food before we head back.” Odd now that she thought back to this day, how she danced around the topic of children instead of changing the subject. In times when she felt nervous or awkward she’d change the subject, dance around it and avoid it as much as possible till she was confronted about it. 

“Welcome in, what could I get you?” the worker asked behind the counter with a warm smile watching (Y/N) eye scan the menu briefly. 

“May I get a medium hot chocolate and a chocolate muffin.” after she had her order taken she sat along side one of the chairs near the pick up counter, her eyes fixed onto her phone screen as she checked the emails she had gotten in the past hour or so opening some to respond back and other’s were ignored. 

The door opened sending in a small cool breeze not cold enough to bring her attention to the door as she kept it fixed on responding back to the email she had opened. The noise in the cafe slowly began to drain out till the sound of her name was called, signaling her order was ready. 

“(Y/N)?” a voice questioned causing her brows to pinch in confusion turning her attention to the stranger, “Yes?” the person held a familiar face yet she couldn’t pin point who it was. Usually if she encountered an old classmate who she never knew the name of she’d smile and nod and just go along with what he or she said. 

Once the stranger received his change he walked closer to her standing a few inches away with a small smile on his face, “It’s Ryan.” the moment those words left her lips, her entire body felt numb she didn’t notice she had dropped her packaged muffin. It’s been twelve years since she last saw him, that night he came home with Presley. Ever since that night she avoided him as much as possible, not daring to look in his direction or cross paths. 

Now here they sat across one another in awkward silence. She had noticed the wedding band on his finger, that was the first thing that caught her eye well beside the fact that he grew up to be even more handsome. He had also found someone to spend the rest of his life with. 

“How long have you been married?” 

“A year.” 

If she had married Ben, they would’ve been married for two years. Funny how time works.

“I thought you were engaged?” 

A questioned that was asked ever too frequently. 

“Yes, but I-I called it off.”

Simple answer that would earn a nod from anyone who questioned what had happened to the beautiful ring on her finger, a question that made her heart clench. Ben on the other hand, he’d be completely honest. A little too honest.

“What happened to the wedding?” “Where’s (Y/N)?” “What went wrong?”

He’d sit there in silence for a moment, thinking of a way to address the question but instead he’d say “Well I cheated on her with my ex, who turned out to be lying about her identity and turned out to be her sister. I lost the one person who was the light in my life, the one love I never thought I could have. So yeah I cheated on her with her bloody sister.” 

Ryan smiled lightly placing his hand atop of her’s “You’ll find your special someone soon.” just then his phone began to rang he brought it out of his pocket as the name Brooklyn flashed across the screen, it must be his wife. 

“I should get going, we should catch up sometime!” 

(Y/N) nodded collecting her belongings as she exited with Ryan, she gave him a small hug before departing back to her office. What if her special someone was already found? What if her special someone was living 3,459 miles away? What if that special someone cheated on her but she still loved him?

Ben sat behind his desk a piece of paper in front of him with a pen in his hand. 

𝘋𝘦𝘢𝘳 (𝘠/𝘕),

𝘗𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘺 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘐'𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘢 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮. 𝘚𝘰 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘷𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘢𝘳 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘪𝘵, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘮𝘢𝘺 𝘥𝘰 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘪𝘵. 𝘉𝘶𝘳𝘯 𝘪𝘵, 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘴𝘩 𝘪𝘵, 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘳𝘢𝘸𝘴. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘢𝘳 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘮𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘵. 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘰𝘳 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴, 𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘉𝘶𝘵, 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘦 𝘢 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦, 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘬. 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘦, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴, 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘯'𝘵 𝘧𝘦𝘭𝘵 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘦𝘧𝘵.  𝘐 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘢𝘥𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴, 𝘐 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘐 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘭𝘺 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯'𝘵. 𝘐'𝘮 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦, 𝘐 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘺𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘥𝘦𝘣𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘰𝘳 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘐 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘐'𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘕𝘦𝘸 𝘠𝘰𝘳𝘬 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘳 𝘶𝘯𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘧 𝘐 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘶𝘪𝘭𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬. 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘭𝘭 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘢 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦, 𝘴𝘰 𝘐 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵. 𝘐 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘭𝘭 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘺. 𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩.

-𝘉𝘦𝘯𝘫𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘯 𝘑𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴

(Y/N) entered the office bidding her workers a good afternoon, as she approached her office Vivian stopped her and handed her an envelope. 

“It came in when you were out.” 

She nodded, shutting the door to her office removing her coat and placed it on the jacket rack placing her drink and muffin onto her desk as she opened the envelope. Her eyes scanned the folded paper slowly she began to read it, “Dear (Y/N), pretty sure I’m the last person..” 

(Y/N) unfolded the letter entirely continuing to read the letter that was written by the person she’s been thinking a lot about lately. She took a sit behind her desk as she read the letter, fresh salty tears blurred her vision as she let out a shaky breath her free hand clutched against her chest. After two years, he was the first person to make some kind of move. He had sent a letter.

She brushed the tears away and leaned back into her chair slowly collecting herself. This would be a perfect time to call him, to talk to him after all he had sent her a letter. She wanted nothing more than to hear his voice.

Hesitantly her thumb hovered over his contact, this memory felt ever so familiar. Something she’d do late nights when it’s been a long day and all she wanted to do was rant to Ben and talk about anything and everything. He had made the first move, now it was her turn to return the favor. He still loved her and believes he doesn’t deserve her love or forgiveness. Before she knew it, the line began to ring she didn’t remember pressing on the call icon or bringing her phone to her ear. It was as if it happened in slow motion, her breath caught in her throat as her blood ran cold. 

Ben groaned looking over at the night stand to see who was disrupting his slumber, he lifted his head from the soft cold pillow slowly rubbing the sleep out of his eyes to read the bright screen. His heart stopped, maybe he was dreaming.

“H-hello?”

The sound of her voice, the angelic voice he hadn’t heard for two years. Maybe he was in heaven.

“(Y/N)?” 

[chrysolina]

My eternal love

Summary - The feeling of having, knowing and believing you have a totally unrequited love for someone can often make most people feel undeserving of such a pathetic fantasy in the future - but does everyone share that same view?

Pairings - Chris Evans x reader, Chris Evans x Jenny Slate, Reader x OC!

Warnings - swearing, angst, unexpected happenings

A/N - Here it is! Part 2 of My love! Enjoy! <3

“And that’s it, congratulations again Miss Y/L/N. We’ll see you on Monday,” the audition panel smiled and waved you off once you thanked them graciously and signed on the dotted paper, your signature being the last one they needed to begin filming ‘Practicion’.

You quickly wandered out of the studio hangar, zipped up well into your short tartan trench coat and out onto the forecourt where you were met by the cool LA January air that kissed your cheeks eagerly. Picking up your phone from your coat pocket, 6:13pm, the locksreen read. Jack would be here any minute now to pick you up and take you to dinner.

You scrolled aimelssly through your phone, your boredom quickly taking over. You took a quick glance at the three missed text messages you had and decided it should be wise to text back your sister and manager with whatever they were asking about or for. As if on its own, your thumb scrolled through the messages list and almost accidentally landed on the one name you swore you deleted - Crusty Evans - also known as, Chris Evans.

Your heart, mind and face cringed at the old nickname you had given him ages ago. It had been little over five months since you had last heard from Chris. From what the internet blogs, magazines and paparazzi rumours told you on an unnecessary week-to-week basis was that Jenny and Chris did spilt for a short amount of time but are - apparently - still ‘seeing each other’.

They must’ve been doing pretty well together since according to an inside source, the couple were last seen looking very happy out and around Tribeca, allegedly trying to find an apartment to live in together.

Why they had to come and live so close to where you and your family lived was beyond infuriating for you and your family.

However, your papa dismissed the idea that any of you would ever see them since ‘they are nobody’s to us’. ‘I wish I could believe you papa’ you thought to yourself as the words repeated themselves in your head ‘but they’ll always be someone’s in this world.”

Before your mind could digest the toxic thought of the couple together, a car horn cut through the chilly air and diverted your attention to where the noise came from.

An unmistakable sleek all black range rover was parked idle by the gates, waiting for someone - more specifically, you. Jack’s new car was certainly a beauty alright, wherever he went in it and wherever you saw it, the black luxury car demanded attention from onlookers - sometimes making you squirm in your seat on the days you’d accompany him somewhere.

In many respects, the car was very much like Jack himself.

Your face broke out into a smile as you pulled the the pricey car door open and was met by the charming Scotsman’s classic smirk. “Why good evenin’ m’lady,” Jack tried to charm you with his thickest Scottish accent possible which only made you laugh in return “did ya get the role?” He merely rolled his eyes at your laugh and began to turn the car around. “I sure did, got it with flying colours - apparently,” You squealed and jumped excitedly up and down in your seat and took Jack hand from the gearstick and shook it for effect.

“Alright you,” he pulled his hand away from your grip and focused back on the LA roads ahead of you “so where would you like to eat tonight? Wendy’s? Chick-fil-a? In-and-out?” Your stomach grumbled at the mere names of the fast food joints. “Wherever it is tho, food’s on me; got it? No buts, I insist.” Your lips turned upwards at Jack’s gentlemanly manner of buying you food.

Food, yes, that was what you were deciding on. After a second or two of short-wired thinking, your finally decided on where to eat. “How about we just go for a classic McDonalds, hm?” You watched eagerly as the Scotsman thought it through and twisted his face in (fake) thought. “Alright then, McDonalds it is.”

The rest of the car ride to the drive-thru was pleasantly quiet bar the sound of Jack’s playlist humming from the speakers. You weren’t bothered by that, you were just enjoying the sights of golden windows around you as the city lit up for the night.

“Tell me again Y/N,” Jack broke through the silence peacefully, making you whip your head around to the man before you “who and what is your role in this film?” The film - of course. You had even forgotten yourself considering first auditions were so long ago “Well, I am playing the role of the main romantic interest of her businessman-husband who is also a recovering drug addict. I think..” As hard as it was, you tried to pluck out who you actually were in the film through all the paperwork you had to sign today, scraping it as you did so.

“Hm, well so long as they have good teeth, you’ll be alright with kissing them huh?” Jack smirked at you and ran his tongue over his plush lips. You chuckled at the now-auburney haired Scot as you recalled the horror of your prom date all those years ago and how digusting his teeth looked once you got up close to kiss him. “Fingers crossed, just in case though,” you and Jack laughed again and watched as the Golden Arches of McDonadls came into view.

“So, what would miss Y/L/N like for food tonight hm? Burger? Fries? McFlurry? Or how about..Me?”

“Jack!”

•••••••

As if as the norm lately, your weekend spent up in the reclusive estates of Hollywood in your own little rented place was easy, relaxing and consisted of nothing more than eating your own home cooked meals, binge watching your favourite shows on Netflix, learning the new script as best as you could and sleeping until late.

It was a great way to ease yourself back into the rush of filming and took your mind off other minute things that floated around your mind.

Before you knew it, 9am rolled around quicker than anticipated and you found yourself being walked by an assistant to the main studio you���d just left that Friday before. Your eyes were quick to take everything in again, routes to the trailers, toilets etc - they all needed to be mapped out by yourself in due course.

Trotting through the main doors to the first - of many - sets and waited whilst the assistant went to look for the director and other cast members.

In the meantime, to calm your nerves, you began to smooth out your short black pencil skirt and toyed wth the sleeves of your white and black lined tailored jacket. In all fairness, your looks were definitely matching up to your status in Hollywood - clean, sweet and professional.

Everything most directors looked for in an actor or actress.

“Where is she?!” The booming voice of the director could be heard throughout the building, making you wince at the volume of his gruff voice.

All of a sudden, out of a door in the distance burst out a short, slightly chubby middle aged tanned man with a thick lit cigarette hanging from his seemingly chapped lips - lined by a grey black moustache. His hair was a little scarse, Black and grey in areas and cut very short - but overall, he looked pleasant enough.

“Ah you must be the infamous Y/N Y/L/N! Welcome welcome, it’s an absolute honour to have you here today.” The director began to talk to you but all you could pick up on was his familiar New York- Italian accent - one that you’d most definitely have if it wasn’t for travelling the world.

“Please, sir; the honour’s all mine,” you quickly thanked his graces about you and excused them as silly and unfitting for someone like yourself. “Oh please darlin’, you’re worth all the hype.”

The director winked at you and shot you a genuine smile in return, one you mirrored almost instantly “and don’t worry about the ‘sir’ thing Y/N, just call me Joe,” before you could thank him on the comfort of calling him his real name, Joe shouted out - seemingly - to his PA that stood a few metres away.

“Marie! Darlin, call him back in,” the young lady only nodded and trotted off someone to the side of the set behind a wall to find someone.

“I’ve yet to introduce you to your co-stars haven’t I?” Your voice was a blubber out of the new oncoming embarrassment and only trusted your head to do the talking, nodding in agreement. Your newest crew had evidently caught wind of your arrival were quick inforce to come and see, greet and meet you.

“Sir, I got him. He’s comin’ now,” the PA quickly shouted out from the wall she disappeared from and disappeared around it again.Who were they on about? Was it your other romantic interest - the drug addict businessman? Who knows.

Before your mind festered any more, you could hear the imminent of clicking heels aiming from the wall the PA came from. Surely it couldn’t have been a woman - the footing of his person was too deep and long to be that of someone in heels.

“Y/N, I’d like you to meet your main co-star, the Chris Evans.”

‘Oh shit!’

••••••

Time seemed infinate and everlasting as you sat hunched over in the plush leather chair you were given in your trailer. Judging by your emotionless stare into nowhere specific, anyone looking at you would say you’re just daydreaming, sleepy or even bored - but you were far from any of those things.

Your mind was running at a million miles a minute, every stupidly minute thought you ever pushed aside during the past five months had all resurfaced and were causing your poor brain havoc.

You wished it wasn’t true - no, you prayed in your hands and knees that this was all just some silly joke. He wasn’t really going to be the actor you’d actually have to kiss and be romantic to once the cameras were rolling, was he? He couldn’t have been - why Chris?

He had marvel films and soon-to-be broadway appearances to be dealing with, he shouldn’t really be here in reality. Maybe this was all just a big fat mistake; a joke that everyone will laugh off in a couple of hours, right? Well...one can hope, you supposed.

With your back to your trailer’s door, your mind allowed you to think that the assistant who was getting lunch for everyone had come back and came with food, so without caution you just called out “The door’s open,” and expected the assistant to waltz in on her own accord.

“Hey, I - uh - brought some lunch for you.” That voice - damn that smooth Boston accented voice - it was here, right behind you. Just over a metre away from you stood the (anxious) man of your nightmares these past couple of months. At the mere sound of his voice, you shot up out to the chair you resides in and whipped your head around to look at him dead in the eye.

The look of shock-horror plastered your face like a pantomime mask, you just couldn’t help it. It was agiven reaction and so was Chris’ in all fairness. He was bewildered by the look on your face and only sent his brain further into it’s shell, his anxiety picking up that bit more. With the paper bag in one hand, Chris began rubbing the nape of his neck and shoulder - a habit you found to have stemmed from his anxiety.

“I thought maybe we could - uh - catch up or well, moreso me apologising for..everything.” It wasn’t until the end of his sentence he finally looked back into your eyes, your posture suddenly relaxing that little bit more, understanding that Chris had only good intentions from being here.

Moving away from your armchair, you decided to collect your lunch from Chris and serve it up - Chicken Caesar salad - your new favourite. Chris quickly gave you the paper bag and watched you help yourself to cutlery, bowls and bottles of water from the stylish yet homely mini kitchen.

“Would it be wrong of me to imagine that you have a bit of a grudge against me right now?” There it was - you wondered how long it’d take for the confident, assured Chris to come through again - evidently not long enough.

“No, you’d be bang on the money,” you huffed and began tossing the salad in the ceramic bowl, those blue eyes continuously boring into your uncomfortable frame - just like the did the whole time you met your fellow cast members- Chris got on your heels the whole time.

“Lucky me hmm,” Chris hummed to himself, tucked his hands in his tan jean pockets, making the light blue shirt he wore bulge around his Adonis-like muscles and leant against the dresser. Why this had to feel like some sort of meetup by two ex’s was beyond you but you thought nothing of it as you set your salad, bottle and cutlery down in the space you were intending to eat from. That was until Chris wedged his body into you, preventing you from moving.

“Y/N, we - I can’t keep doing this. This whole avoidance game, I’ve had enough.” His eyes looked down into yours with a heat that you couldn’t stand on a day like today. Much like him, his look was strong and confident and it made you squirm in your spot.

“I don’t think there’s much more I can say to get us out of this limbo, Chris.” You dared not to look into those eyes and tried to turn away from him, but in just one breath of air, his muscular form was now pressed up against you; breasts to chest, stomach to stomach, you were officially toast.

“Oh I beg to differ Y/N. There’s nothing more Jack can say for you but I think you’re a completely different picture. You have a lot more to say, don’t you darlin’..” you watched intently as Chris’ hand slid out from his tan jeans and out to play with the hem of your jacket.

The air between you was palpable, you could feel his short warm breaths tickling the apex of your neck, the way his muscles rippled against your body after every movement he made. The air was choking you and you hated it.

“Perhaps I do, but I think you’ll find my words will have a very similar ring to Jack’s,” a sudden burst of confidences surged through your veins and made you straighten your spine in defiance to this beautiful menace. Your confindence led you to look right where you didn’t want to and only found hunger in return. Chris’ eyes were lit up with an unmentionable hunger that you couldn’t digest, making you quiver even more.

“Tell me something darlin’, are you and that McCallister a thing? Are you two..dating?” You continuously locked eye contact with the actor and winched in pain as his smirk grew wider, deeper and more mischievous by the second.

“N-no. We’re just very - very - good friends. Nothin’ more!” You denied all the claims Chris tried to pin on you feverishly, trying through every means to keep your image of Jack clean as possible. However, it was evident in Chris’ furrowed brows and darkened stare, he wasn’t having it today.

“Not even friends with benefits? ‘Cause I’ve seen plenty of pictures of you and him together and nothin’, not one inch of those pictures tell me that you’re just friends.” How it was even possible that Chris’ tone could drop another two or three octaves was beyond you. The deep rumble of his chest against yours and the bitterness of his tone solidified your thoughts, he was jealous.

Deciding that now might not be the time to push any buttons, you tried your best to put out the fire Chris had started. “I - I think that’s something you’d have to ask Jack himself. I can’t comment for him if he does have feelings for me.”

“Oh,” Chris chided mockingly, his hand stopping all movement on your jacket “So he does have feelings for you? Aren’t I a genius..” still refusing to make even the slightest bit of eye contact, you tried to wriggle out of his imaginative hold - failing miserably as you did so.

At the thought of you wriggling away, Chris’ hand flew to waist and gripped you possessively tight - he just had to know if you had fallen for the Scotsman over him - he had to. “And do you reciprocate these feelings for him? Hm?”

“Maybe in d-due time..” They do say that the heart is very very precious and Chris knew no different.

His heart dropped ten miles underground at your confession and his eyes began to prick with the hot tears of nearing heartbreak. You were refusing to give in to him - something was holding you back from him and he had to find out what or die trying.

“And what about now?” He chided coolly, the change in tone made you look at him scrutinisingly. “Honestly Y/N, do you have feelings for him as of right now?”

“I don’t...” to think such a small sentence could lift his heart was unbelievable to Chris but filled him with internal joy all the same. Instead of easing up on his hold on you, Chris chose to close in on you even further and cage you in his arms - your body stuck between his and the dresser behind.

“And do you have any feelings for anyone in particular right now?” You knew what he wanted to hear right now, hell - you were close to giving him it. But with being so close to him and in the full knowledge that he had a girlfriend - you weren’t so keen to give him what he wanted.

“Not especially, no.” You deadpanned your time and took to looking straight into his eyes again, watching his eyebrows shoot up his face in undeniable shock.

“Not even for someone like..me?” He chided at you again and pressed his body closer to yours, angling you in such a way one could call it erotic - you, however, begged to differ entirely.

“I think you know the answer to that question, Christopher.” You snorted at his high-hopes, hoping and praying he’d just leave you alone to eat your untouched salad.

Your heart and mind were tearing apart by the seams, one half of you wanted to slap, kick and hit him in all the places it’d hurt the most, the other half of you just wanted to jump his bones here and now, give in to himself and indulge your worst thoughts.

But that would never come to be.

“I actually don’t, do please enlighten me on it.” His mischievous smirk had returned again for the worse and cranked up the anger metre in your mind.

“Fine! You win! I did have feelings for you, yes; I was bordering on loving you, yes. But that and everything else were all ruined the day you decided that fucking bitch you still call girlfriend!” You yelped in anger, pain and grief and tried to push Chris away by his chest, failing in doing so entirely. The tears that were stashed away were now making an appearance and began to stream down your clenched face, ruining your mascara and eyeliner in the process.

Chris didn’t know what to do with this information, you had just confessed that you were romantically attracted to the man and here he was, dumbfounded and generally reeling. He didn’t believe Jack’s word on the phone, he thought they were just to dig at him but now - now, god he was so wrong. “W-what girlfriend?”

“Don’t play stupid now Chris, you know who I’m talking about..” your voice wavered and cracked at his stupidity over the situation.

“Oh, we’re talking about Jenny now, are we?” His voice was suddenly pointed, shard and bitterly cold and made you shiver in fear over what’d he’d say next.

“Who fucking else would I be on about, Chris?”

“Considering I’ve been single since December, I’m finding it hard to think about any ‘girlfriend’ I’m with as of right now..” you felt his head tilt upwards and a heave of air rush from his lips. “I’m calling bullshit, Chris.” You winced in memory of seeing the claims all across the internet, Jenny spending Christmas with his family, the house-hunting, all of it, how could it all be a lie?

“You really think I’m bullshitting right now? Really Y/N?” Chris’s chin came to rest upon your head and you felt the familiar hands wrap around your shorter frame, hugging you tenderly close to him, your hands still stuck in shock on his chest. “You’d be surprised..” you sighed into the tender warm hold of the actor, a feeling you dearly missed, feelings or no feelings at all.

“You have no clue how much I’ve been hurting these past months Y/N, I didn’t think I could want anyone as much as Jenny..but fuck, did you screw me over..” chris chucked at the memories of him reeling over the new found feelings he had for you, realising you weren’t with him anymore and no longer share the same feelings. “Is that meant to be a good thing or a bad thing? I’m having a hard time telling right now Chris..” he laughed again at your sarcastic, straight-to-the-point question, your charm never ceases to leave you after all this time.

“It’s a very good thing, well..that’s if you still feel the same way as you did back then.” He remived his hands from your frame and cupped your wet cheeks in his hands to look at you thoroughly. You looked at him with such a look of longing chris just couldn’t help what he did next. He’d be damned if he never did it and would regret it for the rest of his life.

Wordlessly, Chris quickly joined your lips together in a smouldering yet very endearing kiss. His lips moved and slid between your perfectly, like a missing piece of a jigsaw, fitting you perfectly. Your hands froze open on his chest, your eyes forced wide open at the sudden intimate contact.

It wasn’t until Chris began to move his lips slowly against your own that you realised it - you finally realised that no matter how much pain was done, how much you tried to combat your feelings with denial, you still loved the bastard with all your heart - and that was something you could never change.

Before Chris could pull away in heartbreak over your refusal of his love, you yanked in shirt forward into you and kissed him as if it was the last time, your hands running up his neck and found purchase on his prickly hairy cheeks. Your kiss wasn’t anything like Chris’, trepardising in some areas and soft; yours was passionate and fierce, the kind of kiss the two of you would have to fight for dominance over.

Pulling away slowly, the two of you held your stare into each other’s eyes and lost each other in them. You wanted to kiss him again, and again and again but instead, you focused only on him, the man you fell for so stupidly. Instead of holding you for longer, chris decided to take purchase in the plush seat on front of the dresser and sat you in his lap, his eyes never leaving yours as he relished in the feeling of you playing with the ends of his slightly longer than usual hair.

“My god..where have you been my whole life?” Chris whispered and shook his head in bewilderment and listened to the melodic tune of your giggle ring in his ear. “Right under your nose, silly..” you swiped the bottom of his nose with your index finger and ran your fingers through his growing beard. This had to have been a dream, you didn’t believe for one minute that this was happening - you were actually in Chris’ lap stroking his face like a lovesick baby.

“How will I ever make it up to you Y/N?” He whipsered quietly, running his fingers along your tack and up and down your arm in a soothing manner. You smiled warmly at the softness of the question and thought over how he could make it up to you. “Well, I think it’d take an awful lot of hugs, kisses, time and attention just for being such a bad boy..” you smiled like a Cheshire Cat once his eyes fluttered closed at the sensation of your hands soothing his face, a knowing smirk then beginning to grow after you finished talking.

“What?” You laughed at the smirk on those heavenly lips “you do know I’ll always be a bad boy when I’m around you, right?” You sighed and shook your head at Chris’ mark and only embraced his frame, your hands wrapped around the back of his neck. “Not in public you won’t, will you?” You whispered into his neck firmly whilst your lips found their way around his neck, sucking and kissing certain areas.

“For you darlin’, I’ll be your angel and your devil.”

•••••••

A/N - I just wanna thank everyone for reading this little fic going on and hoped everyone enjoyed it as much as I did! <33

Taglist : @dlb113 @coffeebooksandfandom @chrisevans1fan @badtzmarurogers

[lachlantrash]

“How am I supposed to say no to that?”

"Guys, my girlfriend is so pretty." Lachlan says, walking into your 'office' with a camera pointed at you. Your office has a desk with a computer as most do, but it also has a vanity with the lighted mirror built into it and draws packed with makeup you've become attached to. You're seated at the vanity applying Jeffree Star 'deceased' to your lips.

"Lachlan stop, I look like this everyday." You laugh, putting a hand up as if it'll block you from the camera.

"Exactly, you're so fu- you're so pretty everyday." Lachlan says, almost cursing but then stopping himself.

"Can I ask you for a favor?" You ask, standing from the vanity chair and readjusting your beige crop hoodie, walking towards Lachlan.

"Uh oh, what is this favor?" He asks, keeping the camera pointed at you as you walk up to him and wrap your arms around him.

"Well, I was wondering if you could drive me to go get coffee since my car is still getting fixed..." You trail off, looking up at him with hopeful eyes.

"(Y/N)." He sighs, looking at you. "I don't think so, I still have to record a video for tomorrow so we can go out with your friend tomorrow night." He says, making you give him the best puppy eyes and pouty lips you can.

"Please? For me?" You say, pout still prominent on your face.

 "Don't give me that puppy dog face. How am I supposed to say no to that?" He sighs, accepting he's already lost this battle.

"You're not." You smile, leaning up to give him a kiss on the lips. "Does this mean we can get coffee?" You ask after pulling away.

"Fine, I guess... But you're making it into a vlog for me, I guess an hour long car ride there and back can be today's video." He laughs.

"Sure thing, that works for me." You hum appreciatively, grabbing your phone off the vanity. "Let's go!" You say excitedly, leading the way out of your office and running towards the garage.

"Could you calm down babe, we're just getting coffee." He laughs, trailing behind you towards his car.

"Not just coffee, Lachlan. Dunkin Donuts iced coffee, which I haven't had in a week because of my car being in the shop." You correct him, quickly pulling the car door open as soon as he unlocks it, getting in and situated quickly.

"The drive is still an hour long no matter how fast you buckle yourself, (Y/N)." He laughs, getting in the car to see you struggling in your rush to get buckled. "The camera's off right now, but you know how to turn it on, here. If you feel like anything is worth going in the vlog, feel free to record." He says, handing you over the camera. "You're in charge of the radio." He smiles to you, handing you his phone after attaching it to the aux cord.

"Hmm, should I go through your phone too while I have it?" You tease, going to his music and selecting some older drake tracks since you know Lachlan likes him.

"Go ahead, you're not going to find anything on there babe, maybe some messed up texts between Simon and I but nothing like what you're thinking." He says, continuing to drive and getting on the highway.

"I was kidding, I trust you. I didn't look at anything, I was just putting Drake on." You say, grabbing the camera. "Guys, look at how adorable Lachy is, driving me to go get coffee, he's too good to be true." You gush, aiming the camera at Lachlan.

"You all but forced me to go, don't make me look good for my vlog." Lachlan laughs, briefly looking at you before moving his eyes back to the road.

"I mean, you don't need me to look good." You say, laughing immediately after because of the joke.

"Well you're a stunner, babe." He says grabbing one of your hands over the console.

"He makes me so happy." You say, turning the camera to show the smile on your face.

"Woah guys! Look at her face, look at it! My girlfriends so damn hot!" Lachlan says, adding a wolf whistle in there and earning a laugh from you.

"Alright guys, we'll check in on you in a bit." You say, still laughing as you shut the camera off. "I love you, y'know. And not just because you're driving for two hours for me to get coffee."

"Really? Why else do you love me?" He asks with a chuckle.

"You make me feel like I'm the only girl that matters to you, and yeah I joked about checking your phone earlier but I can say with full confidence that I don't feel the need to with you. You also love my cats so much, and I need that in a guy. Plus, you make really good cookies and you're the best cuddler I know, and you do really sweet things for me, I can't see myself with anybody other than you." You say, playing with his hand in yours.

"I love you too, y'know. You're the best at keeping me warm when it's cold, and you cook for me all the time. You bring me hot cocoa or a beer when it's late and you know I'm still recording or editing, and it's so sweet sometimes I just want to stop so I can show you how much it means to me." He says, pulling your hand closer to him so he can kiss it.

"I'm just happy where I am, I don't regret coming here, even if the closest dunkies is an hour away." You say, making Lachlan roll his eyes. You guys keep driving, singing along to older music like Heartless by Kanye West and some newer songs like the last of the real ones by Fall Out Boy.

You end up grabbing the camera, recording you two jamming out to 'Heat of the Moment' by Asia, a song you fell for due to Supernatural and Lachlan has too since you've made him watch that episode.

"He only knows that song because I've made him watch supernatural with me, he's the type of boyfriend who pays attention for me. He's great guys, find yourself a Lachlan... But not the actual Lachlan, he's mine." You explain to the camera once the song is finished.

"Awe c'mon, you don't want to share me?" He teases, looking at you quickly before going to the exit on the highway.

"Hell no, you're most definitely mine. I won't share you with anyone, not in the way I have you. And you're not sharing me with anyone, we have each other." You say cheerfully, getting excited as you know the Dunkin Donuts is close.

"I guess I can't argue with that, anyone who even tries to get you the way I have you will get the crap beat out of them." He says, hand tensing in yours. "Keeping it pg for the vlog, but I'm sure you know what I mean babe."

"Of course I do Lachy, but no more sex innuendos, we're almost at dunkies and I'm so excited for coffee." You see appreciatively, pointing the camera out the window so it can see the sign for the coffee shop.

"Don't show them the area, they'll be able to figure out where we live." He sighs, imagining fans showing up at your doorstep.

"Sure, they'll be able to figure out where we live from this. They know we live an hour away, but they don't know what direction we live in. Plus, they know our general area, and you've shown our backyard before so like, this is nothing." You argue as you guys pull into the drive-thru.

"Just your usual coffee?" He asks, looking at you as he waits in the drive-thru line.

"Can I get a chocolate glazed donut too? I've been craving one and I don't know when I'll get here again until my car is fixed." You ask, doing a pouty lip behind the camera.

"Of course you can get a donut, I don't know why you're practically begging me." He laughs.

"Well, I don't want to get fat on you but like, I really want the donut... I don't care if the internet knows, my periods coming soon and I just really, really want a chocolate glazed donut." You announce, making Lachlan laugh.

"You're not going to get fat (Y/N), and if you did I wouldn't care. Eat a donut, you deserve it." He says, pulling up to the intercom to order for you. "Hi, can I get a large iced S'mores coffee, extra cream and extra sugar? And a large hot coffee cream and sugar, and two chocolate glazed donuts. That's all, thank you." Lachlan says to the intercom when it asks for his order, driving off after being told the price.

"Here, take the camera so I can grab the money from my bra." You say, being comfortable with the camera from being around it so much.

"Babe no, I'm paying for it." He says, grabbing his wallet from his pocket.

"Lachlan I made you drive here, I'm paying." You argue, placing the camera on the dashboard to grab the money from your bra.

"You just took cash out of your bra on camera. Put it back, as your boyfriend I request you let me buy you coffee and a donut. I won't let you pay, it's not a big deal." He says, driving up to the window as you huff and put the cash back into your bra. He gets handed a tray with the coffee which he passes to you, and then he gets handed a bag with the donuts. He gives them his card to charge the things to, and then he drives off and heads back to the highway.

"I'm paying you when we get home, remind me." You tell him, taking a sip of his hot coffee and making a face at the camera after, placing it in his cup holder.

"Stop stealing sips of it if you hate my coffee so much. You can pay me back tonight off camera, I'll remind you then." He says, laughing immediately after as he catches your eyes go wide.

"Oh my god, Lachlan! Okay guys, this was really cute because he drove an hour for me to get coffee and we both ordered the same donut and all, but he had to make it dirty, so I think we're going to stop recording." You laugh, turning the camera off. "Why did you say that." You laugh, putting the straw into your coffee.

"What? Does this mean you're not going to do it? I don't want cash, and I was kidding about you paying me with sexual acts unless y'know, you want to..." He trails off, focusing on the road.

"I will, but everyone who watches this video is going to give you shit for it for awhile." You laugh, taking a sip of the coffee. "I love you, I need my car to be fixed soon so I can drive here every day again." You sigh, enjoying the taste of the caffeine.

"Well, if you're gonna 'pay me' the way you're going to tonight, then I think I can drive you here until your car is fixed." Lachlan says, making you groan.

"I love you and all, but this really needs to stop before we start something we can't finish for another hour." You sigh, making Lachlan laugh.

[im-tops-bottom]

💑Rare Love💏 (just a fic idea)

"CHILLED BEHIND YOU" Vanoss calls out before laughing as he hears Chilled Yelp.

"Sorry Delirious, I would love to stay and chat but I gotta run" Chilled says as his hula girl prop starts zig zagging out of the room.

"noooooooo Chilled come back. I need to shoot you"

"wow Delirious, are you just gonna shoot a little girl just like that? You haven't even taken me out to dinner yet"

Everyone laughs at that and starts making bad date jokes. Vanoss, Delirious and Cartoonz all feel different feelings as they mask it under the laughter and jokes.

"noooooooo the props wo- oh my God you changed into that chair I kept walking pass? No way" Delirious says before having a drink.

"alright run it back. New teams. Let's leave the Gmod gods deligate us" Moo says as he laughs at a tweet Daithi posted.

"and this time Vanoss no ghosting" Panda says as he eats some of his food.

"hey everyone what's up?"

"oh hey Galm. We are playing Prop Hunt. Wanna join?"

"it could be everyone vs the Anthony crew"

Once again everyone goes into giggles and jokes. 3 certain YouTubers secretly don't like this idea as it would mean they won't get to be on the same team as Chilled.

"hey is Mini online? See if he can get into contact with Padilla. The more Anthonys we can recruit, the more of a chance this would turn into one massive derpfest"

"mini had to go to bed early. Sam is ill"

"damn. Hey is anyone Keen to play Mario kart afterwards"

"hell no. I've seen Galm play and he is way too good at it."

Jokes about Panda coming last in 90% of the games pop up and when they hear Daithi's come through their headsets they start making Daithi de Cumberbatch jokes.

Galm joins in on the session without recording as he is only playing just for fun and the game commences with team Anthony vs "team non Anthony".

"HEY ANTHONY"

"which one?"

"I'm seeing Chilled pop up on my screen"

"ah shit. Now look"

Delirious laughs as he is about to shoot Chilled but let's out a "noooooooo I shot the wrong one" as his player model dies.

Chilled laughs as his prop jumps around in the kitchen "I'm the king of props. No one can shoot me" and just like that he watches as his prop gets destroyed by Vanoss.

"that kill came at the right time" Vanoss says as he carries on looking for the other two props.

"what the hell Vanoss. I thought we had something special. You even ghosted for me man"

Vanoss blushes as he stays silent and concentrates on looking for the other two. Lucky for him it doesn't get awkward as he locates Galm and starts chasing him around the attic. He shoots Galm before the timer runs out.

"WHOOOOO I LAST A WHOLE ROUND WITHOUT GETTING SHOT"

"Panda had an amazing spot too. Next round I'm following you"

"where was it?"

"the both of you follow me next round"

After a couple of rounds they finish the Gmod session and some of the group leave. The only ones left are Chilled, Vanoss, Delirious, Cartoonz and Terrorizer who came in right at the end. They decide to see if anyone is else is available for Last Year Nightmare and manage to pick up Gorillaphant and Ohm.

Whenever Vanoss, Delirious or Cartoonz was the killer, they would do their best to not try and attack Chilled and if they were on the same team then they would fight over saving Chilled. Because of this Chilled was dubbed the Banana Bus Princess with his 3 saviors.

Ze joins in the call and starts teasing Chilled about leaving the derp crew but chilled whines about how everyone is teasing him. Ze laughs and tells Chilled to suffer as he joins in on the next round of games which was CAH before leaving.

The crew finish up on a game of Skribbl.io before ending their recordings and just sitting back.

"so Chilled you still Keen for this weekend?"

"yes, I can't wait"

"what's happening this weekend?"

"Chilled and I are recording some vlogs and doing a 24hr live stream with Galm, John and Tom. John found this cabin in the woods that is apparently haunted so Galm said no balls we'll do some vlogs there. If there is any internet then we'll do the 24hour stream there otherwise we'll do it after the weekend and just talk about the experience"

"can I come?"

"wow Cartoonz, someone who hates horror games wants to go to a haunted cabin in the woods? Until Dawn anyone?"

Everyone chuckles at Delirious' joke while Cartoonz tells him to shut up.

"hey man I'd be down for a spooky house tour"

"and the only person who has ever seen you in real life has been Cartoonz"

"who says anything about me being on cam?"

"are you serious?"

"yeah I'm serious. I trust everyone not to let it out that I've secretly been a talking teddy bear all this time"

Everyone makes jokes about Delirious face reveal as they plan the trip. Terrorizer says he'll see if anyone else is keen for the trip and will let Chilled and Ze know by tomorrow.

A couple of days later and it's Friday. Everyone had gotten time off their jobs so they can pack and all meet up at the airport for the overseas friends to join.

Everyone has their recording devices already out, including Delirious who is only recording for personal reasons. Everyone makes sure to not get Delirious in frame and if they do then they'll make note to edit something to block his face out. They laugh as they realize they all had been recording the moment they woke up.

They head out to grab some shopping for the weekend before going through drive thru's at different places to order something to eat as they don't want anyone to spot Delirious.

They arrive at the spooky cabin just after 2;30pm and park up. They bring everything inside and pack the shopping away before checking out the rooms.

"thank God it's a huge cabin" 2 stories in fact, Ze says as he looks around.

Cartoonz, Delirious, Vanoss and Chilled take one room. Ze, Galm, Tom and John take another. Terrorizer, Daithi, Mini and Wildcat take one. Kryoz, Scotty, Smitty and Panda take the last one.

"I swear if we some freaky shit, I'm ditching you guys and just making a fucking run for it" Wildcat says as he grabs a drink out of the fridge.

"you know what we should do?" Mini asks.

Everyone shouts out "ASK MINI" before cracking up laughing.

After finding out that yes there is reception, Mini turns his phone data on and sends out a tweet. He mentions everyone who is at the cabin and to start sending questions while recording equipment is being set up.

Ask Mini got real hectic and at some point there were dares put in place as well. Delirious, Smitty and Vanoss stayed off camera. Delirious for obvious reasons while Smitty and Vanoss weren't real big on being recorded. Vanoss was still shy in front of the camera which everyone joked about.

His shyness went away however when halfway through someone had tweeted that Chilled looked weird standing behind the couch and should just sit between Cartoonz and Ze. just as soon as space was made, Vanoss rushed over to sit down and pulled Chilled onto his lap. Jokes were made and he ignored Delirious and Cartoonz' glares in favor watching Chilled go red when Ze sings the wedding song.

After playing around outside and playing some games inside (they had laptops, phones, board games and console's galore. All types of games were played) they had a BBQ before heading of to their rooms.

Each room had their TV's on with different movies playing in each one. It was nice and calm. Well except for one.

"I wanna sleep next to Chilled"

"but I want to as well"

"how about one of you pick tonight and the other goes tomorrow night"

"why do you get two nights?"

Chilled watched the 3 fight and can't help but snort. He's had a thing for each one of these idiots and can't believe they are still fighting over him. What did he do to deserve this.

"how about instead of fighting, one takes each side"

In a minute, Chilled finds himself in an awkward position. Cuddling on his right is Cartoonz, his left is Delirious and underneath him is a smirking Vanoss.

"guys this is not what I had in mind"

"shhhh Anthony. The movie is playing"

As it was still early in the night, they watched a couple of movies. As each movie came along, Cartoonz, Delirious and Vanoss got more and more touchy feely.

Halfway into the third movie Chilled let's out a little moan as he feels a hand slide pass his clothed hard on and laying right on his thigh. In the span of several seconds of silence, Chilled finds not only himself but the other gentleman naked and kissing all over Chilled. Chilled has to bite his bottom lip so he doesn't moan out loud as teeth come into play.

Chilled finds that it was going to be a great night. He's sucking on Cartoonz as Delirious eats him out and Vanoss bites all over his body. None of them noticing a red light by the doorway.

Each of the older men take turns at drilling into Chilled. At times there are tag teams as Chilled gets spitroasted while at other times they manage to find away for two of them slip Chilleds ass while the third is getting a blowjob. Sooner or later they have practically gone through every single sex position and making up their own (and oh boy are they greatful that all 4 men are flexible) as the sun rises up.

As they make their way downstairs they notice everyone smirking at them. The older 3 look smug while the youngest of the 4 has gone completely red as he limps his way over to the kitchen table to grab some pancakes.

Chilled smiles as he is given painkillers by Delirious. Vanoss gets him coffee. Cartoonz grabs a soft pillow for him to sit on. They surround chilled as they eat while feeding chilled some of their own pancakes even though he's eating his own.

After the weekend is done and everyone is driven to the airport, another argument is made as Vanoss, Cartoonz and Delirious fight over who gets Chilled.

Terrorizer stands between the 3 and tells them that Chilled has his own life and he can make time to visit all 3 men or they can organize to meet him but until those moments come up, they'll just have to deal with long distance relationships.

Daithi feels proud as he pats his boyfriend on the back for that incredible speech.

Everyone says goodbye (chilled gets pulled into 3 long kisses) as they all separate to go their own ways.

....

So this was an idea I had in my head as I was rewatching some old gaming vids (i pretty much watched every video of that had chilled with either 3 YouTubers.) Another inspiration was this fic which I really liked.

Seriously if anyone has any ChilledxVanoss, ChilledxDelirious or ChilledxCartoonz fics then let me know.

And if anyone wants to write this up as a full fic then tag me because I would love to read it. I'm not great at writing and I prefer reading other people's stuff rather than writing my own.

[quadhouse]

The Rack: Chapter 2

Andrea stared at her reflection in shock.  She did not want to believe what just happened.  But the evidence was staring her in the face.  Not to mention hanging from her chest.  But there still was the fact that breasts don’t grow that fast.  She raised one hand and gently poked her left breasts.  She could feel her hand touch the soft mass of her breast.  More disturbingly, she could feel her breast being poked by her hand.

Andrea jerked her hand back.  How was this possible?  Breasts do not grow like that.  She took a deep breath to steady herself.  Instead the stretching of the shirt across her breasts kept her situation in front of her mind.  She pressed her hands against her breast, as if she could push them back.  Her cleavage rose almost to her chin.  Shocked at feeling her breath move over the top of her breasts, Andrea let them go.  The bounce staggered her.  She couldn’t deny it any longer, those really were her breasts.

There was a knock on the door.  “Are you alright in there,” Nicole asked.  “Don’t tell me we got you the wrong size top.”

“No,” Andrea said.  “Everything’s fine.  It’s, just this top is very tight.”

“Of course, silly,” laughed the waitress.  “We’re called ‘The Rack’ for a reason.  So, the tighter the better.  Now, come out so I can see how it fits.”

Andrea picked up her purse.  Then she took a deep breath and did what Nicole asked her to.  She was expecting the waitress to gasp at her sudden and drastic increase in breast size.  That didn’t happen.  She expected exclamations of shock.  That didn’t happen.  She expected questions.  Lots of questions.  That didn’t happen either.  What did happen was that Nicole looked at her and smiled.

“You look good,” the waitress said.  “Now, let me show you where we put our purses.  After that, I can start showing you the ropes.”

Andrea nervously followed behind the other woman.  She kept glancing at the other employees as they passed them.  None of them gave her more than a glance.  She knew some of them had to have seen her when she walked through the first time.  So why didn’t they notice the change in her figure?  It didn’t take them long to reach a mostly empty area in the back.  There, Andrea could see the employees’ belongings, mostly purses and jackets.  She found a spot and placed her purse there.

“Do you have any experience waitressing,” Nicole asked as the two women walked back to the front.

“Yes,” Andrea answered.  “I used to work at Jaybird’s Burgers before that drunk driver decided to turn it into a drive-thru.”

“Oh, I’m sorry about that,” Nicole said with a wince.  “That place had the best burgers.  Will they be able to re-open?”

“Yeah,” Andrea sighed.  “But not anytime soon.  They decided to remodel with the insurance money.”

Nicole nodded at that.  “Back to the job.  Since you have experience, I’ll let you handle the first customers in our section while I watch.  Everything should go well enough that I can let you work alone.  You shouldn’t need me for more than any special orders or items not on the menu.  As this is your first day, you wouldn’t know about those things.”

Andrea agreed.  That was the best way to do this.  Besides, she didn’t want to follow anybody around while she was trying to figure out why and how her breasts got so big.  A part of her was still in denial.  Insisting that this was some sort of dream or hallucination.  But she remembered the feel of her breast when she touched it.  More importantly, she remembered feeling her breast being touched.  Not only that, but she could feel the heavy bounce and slow sway of her breasts with each step.

Andrea took a deep breath to calm herself.  She stopped breathing in when she heard her bra creak in complaint.  Her bra!  Her eyes widened in surprise.  It was only then that she realized that her bra had changed with her breasts.  At the size she was at now, it should have snapped in two or be squeezing her to death.  How did she not notice her bra changing with her?

“Are you alright,” Nicole asked.

“Yes,” Andrea said as she composed herself.  She knew she had to come up with a reason why she suddenly stopped.  “I just realized that my two housemates will probably come by.  They knew I was coming here for an interview.”

“So, they’ll come here to watch you work and possible heckle you,” Nicole stated.  Andrea nodded.  “Well, as long as they don’t make too much of a nuisance of themselves, then they can stay.  If they buy something, that is.”

“If they come,” Andrea said.  “I’ll tell them that.  But, I hope they don’t come.”  Since Nicole seemed to accept her explanation, Andrea continued walking.

Once the two women were back in the dining area, Nicole showed Andrea which tables where theirs.  Andrea then waited on the elderly couple sitting in their area.  For Andrea, it was like riding a bicycle.  Excluding the huge breasts hanging from her chest.  She took the couple’s order while ignoring the quick peeks from them.  At this point, their looks were the last thing on her mind.

Once she had taken the couple’s order out to them, Nicole waved her over.  “Did I do anything wrong,” she asked once she was near.

“No,” Nicole answered.  “You did everything right.  I just wanted to know if you wanted your own section of tables tonight?  If so, I can ask Elizabeth if you can.”

“That’s up to you,” Andrea said.  “I don’t want to cut into somebody’s paycheck.”

“Don’t worry,” Nicole said.  “While that’s a good sentiment to have, we are short-handed right now.  Nobody should mind working their normal number of tables.  Hell, I think some of us would pay you to take our extras.”

“If you’re sure,” Andrea agreed.  “And as long as everybody and Elizabeth agrees.”

“Great!  I’ll be right back.”  Andrea watched a Nicole walked away.  She almost shrugged her shoulders in acceptance of the waitress’s action but didn’t after a quick look down.  Instead, she went to check on the tables in their area.  Nicole a couple of minutes later with a bright smile.  The smile told Andrea all she needed to know.

An hour later and Andrea was back in her groove.  The Rack had gotten busy, but not overwhelmingly so.  True to Nicole’s words, the other waitresses did not mind that she had taken their extra tables.  In fact, they all seemed very happy to see her.  The customers were a delight.  None of them gave her a hard time.  Sure, there were looks, but she would have gotten those anywhere.  In fact, the only problem she had was that she and the other waitresses were over endowed.  

Andrea was standing near the kitchen door when Elizabeth exited it.  “Is everything going alright,” she asked Andrea.

“It’s like old times,” Andrea replied.

“Are you considering staying here?”

“Well,” Andrea hedged.  “The tips are nice.  Better than at Jaybird’s actually.”

“But you’re still not sure you’re going to stay,” Elizabeth prompted.

“I’m leaning toward it.”  What surprised Andrea was that she actually was thinking about staying.  Huge boobs aside, this was a pretty good place to work.

At that moment, Andrea looked at the main entrance.  She didn’t know why she chose that moment, but she was glad she did.  Her two housemates, Diane Clearwater and Mary Higgs, walked in.  They quickly spotted her and wave.  Andrea groaned.

“Friends of yours,” Elizabeth asked as she looked at the two women.

“My housemates,” Andrea responded.  She watched as Cindy approached her friends.  “I should have known they would come here when I didn’t go back to the house we share.”  After talking with Andrea’s friends for a few moments, Cindy turned and let them to a table.  Of course, it was in Andrea’s section.

“Well,” Elizabeth said.  “I’ll let you take care of your friends.  I do hope you decide to stay with us.”  Elizabeth then walked into the dining area.

With a sigh, Andrea went to her friends table.  “Hey girls,” she said as she approached their table.  “Fancy meeting you here.”

“Oh, you know us,” replied Diane.  She was a tall blonde with a relatively curvy figure.  Before today, Andrea would have said she was a busty woman.  “We’re always looking for a good place to eat.”

“That’s right,” Mary absently agreed.  She was a short redhead.  Her slender figure made her look even smaller than she was.  Her head swiveled as she watched the other waitresses.  “Why did you doubt you’d get hired here?”

Andrea opened her mouth to answer.  Before she could say a word, the impossible happened again.  Her breasts started growing!  She froze in shock. ��Surely someone would notice her breasts growing.  But nobody reacted.  There were no gasps, shocked stares or pointing fingers.  Even her two friends didn’t react to her breasts growing right in front of them.

“Seriously,” Diane said as Andrea’s breasts reached twice the size of her head.  “You’re bigger than half the women here.  This place is about big boobs.  Why did you think you wouldn’t get hired?”

“Because I didn’t know the waitresses were this big,” Andrea said.  She figured she had to say something and that was the safest thing she could think of.  Noticing that her breasts were starting to loom over the table, Andrea backed up a step and turned to her left.  Her breast continued their slow march down her body.

“I don’t think there is anybody as big as you,” Mary said as she eyed Andrea’s form.  “If there was, I’d have heard of them.”

“Of course, you would have, you pervert,” Diane said.

“I am not a pervert,” Mary said primly.  “I am a lesbian who appreciates women with large breasts.  As you should know, Diane.”

Hearing her friends normal banter helped Andrea to calm down.  Once she calmed, she was able to think.  It was then that she realized there was one thing she hadn’t tried.  Earlier she had discounted that she was dreaming.  But she never really tried to prove that she wasn’t.  After all, you can feel things in dreams.  The first chance she got, she was going to prove this was a dream.  But for now, she may as well play along.  If it really was a dream, it didn’t matter how big her boobs got.  In the morning, they’d be back to normal.  “As much as I like to watch you argue, I am at work,” she said.  “Could you order something.

“Um,” Diane said as she examined the wall mounted menu.  “I think I’ll have the pulled pork sandwich, sauce on the side please.  And for the sides, the potato wedges and coleslaw.”  Andrea wrote down the order and looked at Mary.  She could see and feel her breasts pushing her arms up.  She could see her left breast pushing out to the side.  She was already enormous.  And they were still growing.

“I think I’ll have the three-rib meal,” Mary answered.  “With the baked beans and coleslaw.”

“Okay,” Andrea said as she finished writing Mary’s order.  “That’ll be a few minutes.  Are you guys drinking anything?”

“Oh.  Uh, ice tea for me,” Diane said.

“I’ll take a diet Coke.”

“I’ll be right back with your drinks.”  With that, Andrea turned away.

Immediately Andrea could tell the difference between her current breast size and her previous one.  There was a very noticeable lag from when she started turning and when her breast started moving.  The same occurred when she stopped.  Even though she was looking straight forward, the bottom of her field of view was taken up by her breasts.  Her steps were now slow and ponderous.  She couldn’t swing her arms as her breasts were now much wider than she was.  The bottom curve of her breasts was below her waist, almost even with her hips.

“It’s a good thing this is a dream,” Andrea told herself as she marveled at her sheer size.  “Otherwise, I'd be pinned to the floor by my own boobs.”

As she made her way towards the back, Andrea looked around.  She was getting stares.  But that was to be expected with breasts as large as hers.  Some of the diners were even taking pictures.  She wasn’t sure how she should feel about that, but as it was a dream, she let it go.  Once she got to the door, she stopped in shock.  The door was actually two swinging doors.  And, as wide as they were, her breasts were almost as wide.

Suddenly the doors sprung open.  Andrea was too close and too big to jump away.  The doors crashed into the front of her breasts.  She gasped as white, hot fury raced through her.  As her knees buckled from the pain, only one thought was on her mind.

This was not a dream.