#but i honestly thought it was just because neither of them are psychic-types‚ which always threw ME off as a kid

[front-facing-pokemon]

[iamanartichoke]

I started typing this in the tags of this post, and it got too long, and then I was going to just reblog the post with this as an addition but that got too long too, and I've been meaning to make a post addressing free will vs. predestination since the premiere anyway, so - here we go. Spoilers, obviously.

Cut for length and spoilers. Please blacklist #loki tv series spoilers, #loki series spoilers, and #loki spoilers.

This is kinda rough and I'm not sure it actually makes any sense but I'm posting it anyway.

I realize that the post is a joke, obviously (and it is hilarious) but I started thinking about the implications and couldn't stop because it's honestly a goldmine of existential reflection and an inevitable crisis or three.

Let's look at a scenario.

Say you're late to work for reasons totally beyond your control: your neighbor stopped you to ask a question on your way out the door; you swung through the drive-thru for a quick coffee but the person in front of you is ordering a full continental breakfast ffs (this happened to me this morning); there was an explosion and then the Winter Soldier randomly dropped from the sky and landed on the hood of your car. Whatever. Shit happens.

So you're late, but on this particular day, your lateness somehow has consequences that lead to and create a nexus event and the next thing you know, you're being arrested, tried, convicted of time crimes and ultimately (a version of you is) erased from existence.

And this is if it's not even your fault you're late.

Now say that you're late and it is your fault. You took a new route on a whim and drove a little more slowly because you passed a particularly pretty meadow; you hit the brakes at a yellow light instead of speeding through bc you wanted the quick chance to check your email; you sat in your car for a few extra minutes in the parking lot, because maybe your job sucks and you really needed those extra minutes today to psyche yourself up into getting out of the car and going inside and clocking in.

These little choices are you exercising your free will. Because to me, free will is all or nothing - it doesn't just apply to the big decisions.

On the other hand, predestination means that regardless of the choices you make or if it's a big decision or not, everything you do is ultimately going to lead you to a set point or position or place (your destiny).

And I can kind of look at it like a GPS - that is, there are a number of "insignificant" choices you could make and they will still lead you to where you're predestined to go. Like how a GPS will reconfigure your route if you miss your exit on the highway. It doesn't matter if you took Route A or Route B, you're still going to end up at your destination.

But say sometimes the route does matter. Say that there are certain scenarios in which there's only one road (for example, 14 million losses vs 1 win) and you can only get on it by following a specific series of events and what determines the ultimate outcome is whether or not you're late to work that day.

If you decide to wait those extra five minutes in the parking lot, that means that you weren't in your cubicle at 9:03 when Stanley from Accounting wandered by with his giant stack of papers, and when Mary Sue said hello to him, he got distracted and tried to wave and ended up dropping those papers. Had you been at your cubicle, you'd have swooped down to help him but since you weren't there, Stanley is crouched on the floor alone and doesn't notice Joe coming at him with a paper trolley so when he stands up, he and Joe collide and Stanley loses his balance and goes face-first toward the trolley and breaks his nose when he hits the metal handle on his way down.

Now Stanley has to go to the hospital to get his nose set because you wanted to sit in your car and spend five extra minutes hating your life that morning.

If the sacred timeline says that Stanley is supposed to be in that ER at that specific time on that specific day, and no other set of circumstances would get him there, because this will ultimately take Stanley down the road to whatever greater journey he's supposed to go on, then it has to happen. But say you exercise your free will and decide not to wait those five minutes, because the free will applies to every choice you make, even the tiny, insignificant ones. You chose to put on your big person pants and took a deep breath and just head inside - and because you chose to do that and because you were at your cubicle to help Stanley with his papers, Stanley never ends up in the ER and the timeline that's supposed to happen is suddenly at risk and the TVA has to get involved (I assume).

So having free will introduces way, way too many variables into a fixed timeline to ever keep track, because you're taking these tiny, seemingly insignificant choices that people are making every minute of every day, and you're multiplying them by trillions of sentient beings in the universe, and you're saying the fate of the timeline and reality itself depends on all of these beings either always making the choice they're supposed to make or constantly sending the TVA out whenever they don't.

It's fair to conclude, then, that both free will and a fixed, single timeline can't exist at the same time. Either you adhere to the fixed timeline and everyone does exactly what they're supposed to do every second of every minute of existence, or you have free will and autonomy over all of your decisions, no matter how big or small, and those decisions can result in a number of outcomes, ultimately leading you to one of several possible destinations.

Case in point: Tony didn't have to snap his fingers in Endgame. He chose to. Had he not, Thanos would have won. It doesn't matter if there was one way to victory or 14 million ways to failure; the timeline could ultimately only go one of two ways and the choice Tony willingly made determined that Thanos lost. It wasn't predetermined because if Tony had not chosen to snap his fingers, the timeline would have gone the other way.

My personal belief - and this isn't necessarily for the MCU, but in general - is that we do possess free will and the future is ever shifting and changing because nothing is written in stone. It holds up against most, if not all, of the world's belief systems. For example, if you believe that people have guardian angels, the rule is generally that your guardian angels can help you but you have to ask them; they can't decide to intervene without your permission because to do so would infringe upon your free will.

Similarly, you can go on etsy and pay $5 for a funsies psychic reading or pay a lot more money for an in-depth, specific tarot reading and both will tell you that the outcomes may change depending on the paths you take, and that their ultimate advice is for you to keep your focus on your goals and your own self so that you can be subconsciously manifesting the best possible future for yourself. (Not that I know this from experience. It was one time. It was a few times. My point stands, and also stop judging me.)

To get back to the MCU, though - if you determine that both a single, fixed timeline and free will can't simultaneously exist, and your ultimate purpose is upholding said timeline and not letting anyone fuck it up, lest it break off into lots of different branches, then it poses a pretty serious moral and/or ethical question of - who decides what choices we make and what paths we're destined for? The time lizards? Who gave them that authority? Did anyone, or did they just manifest themselves into existence one day, create the universe, and then decide all of the rules (and, if so, where does that leave the norns and the gods and other super powerful beings who are generally thought to be in charge of things)?

If free will doesn't exist and everyone is acting based on what has been predetermined for them by some higher being (or, in this case, time lizards), it takes away our autonomy, and if everything we do and every single tiny step we take is decided for us, what makes us any different than cogs in a machine just following orders? What separates us from robots?

Speaking of robots, it's interesting to me that the TVA's screening process (if you can call it that) has a failsafe against robots specifically. Any robot that might come through is destroyed immediately and in this case, “not a robot” is defined, more or less, as a sentient being that possesses a soul. What does the TVA have against robots if their ultimate goal is ensuring that the robotic machinations of the time lizards are consistently carried out to protect the sacred timeline?

A soul makes you human; the energy of the soul is what you, at the core, are. It can be assumed that having a soul also means that you have some sort of moral and ethical code by which you live your life but, if you don't also have free will, then what is the point of possessing a soul and a moral and ethical code?

Loki is a villain and he's told by Mobius, the TVA, Odin, and pretty much everyone who ever meets him that the only thing he's good for - the only reason he exists - is to cause pain and suffering and death. This has been predetermined for him; this is not his fault and he did not choose it. And every single choice he makes has either already been destined as the choice he was supposed to make, or will be pruned so it won't grow into the wrong timeline. Ultimately Loki can change neither his final destination, nor the purpose and meaning of his existence.

Which leads me to the theory that the several Loki variants that the TVA keeps coming across are the result of Loki consistently resisting against his predetermined path; he's trying to find the timeline where he is able to latch onto and keep his own free will in defiance of the timekeepers but, so far, he hasn't been successful. This could segue into why the current Variant is now going scorched earth and just obliterating the main timeline completely - because if there is no sacred timeline, there's nothing dictating who or what Loki can be, and free will is regained. If there's a multiverse that branches and branches beyond anyone's control, then there must be a branch in there, somewhere, where Loki can exist on his own terms and decide how his own story goes.

This also might be a theory for why Loki is already setting his sights on taking over the TVA (assuming that's not just something he told the variant for reasons). But my original point in delving into all this is to ask: if Loki is predestined to always be a villain whose story plays out exactly the same way because that's what's supposed to happen, then how can anyone ever hold his misdeeds against him? He's literally just existing as the timekeepers decided he would exist and everyone is blaming him for it.

And this leads me to ask, as well, if one's soul is generally good, and one possesses more good traits than bad, what is the logic in making them exist only for pain and destruction? If it's for a greater good, then it stands to reason Loki is not the only one predestined for misery, and what greater good could come from all that suffering?

Conclusion: the existence of the TVA as an organization means that there is one fixed, sacred timeline but the existence of said timeline is immoral and unethical because it means no one actually has any free will at all in the MCU. The very notion of heroes and villains is pointless because it has nothing to do with your own qualities or morality, it's literally the luck of the draw. In order to have free will, the sacred timeline has to be destroyed, and so my prediction is that the Big Bad of the Loki series is not the TVA and not the time keepers but the actual timeline itself, and the entire fate of the MCU rests on whether or not Loki can ultimately succeed.

Also, don't be late for work.

[changeling-rin]

Hi Rin, TheChargingRhino here. If they guys could have legendary/mythical Pokémon, what would they choose? (Can also answer for the sequel Links if you want)

My only question here is: do the Ultra Beasts count as Legendary?  The Internet  says yes, so apologies in advance if that wasn't part of the original question!

Gen gets a Latias, because red Loftwing, red bird-like dragon, it fits and I will not take no for an answer.  Plus, Healing Wish/Recover, she’s a Psychic type, they get a lot of access to healing moves and for the medic of the group I think that works very well.  (Also yes, Mega is an option.)

Speck would have a Shaymin, I think.  Small and cute but wow can it make you hurt it you don’t pay attention to it.  (Yes, Forme Change is a thing)

The Four are... tricky, as they always are.  I think I’d give them Deoxys, because I think the options with the Formes gives them the best equivalent for their normal M.O.

I’m gonna split Mask and Ocarina here, regardless of the Meloetta that I said they already have.  Ocarina probably gets a Celebi, because Time Travel, and also because cute and mostly innocent but still dangerous if you don’t pay attention.  Mask, on the other hand, gets Dialga, again because Time Travel and also because it will wreck you if you don’t take it out quickly enough.

Dusk would probably end up with a Zamazenta, because wolf, and also because protective instincts say ‘Shield’ to me more than ‘Sword’.

RGBV can each have a Tapu, because I’m original like that.  Green gets Tapu Bulu, Blue gets Tapu Fini, Red gets Tapu Lele, and Vio gets Tapu Koko.  

Lore is also very tricky, honestly, but I think I’d either give him an Ultra Beast, or Hoopa.  Hoopa because it’s a complete prankster and they’d get along splendidly, or an Ultra Beast because they function just a little bit to the left of normality.  But probably Hoopa, because I also like the concept of Hoopa Unbound and there being this underlying terror beneath the prankster shell that only their enemies get to see.

Realm... is a lot more trouble than I thought he’d be, and since I can’t seem to peg him for any single Legendary I’m going to give him the Lake Trio.  Uxie, Azelf, and Mesprit did not know what they were getting themselves into with this boy, but at least there’s three of them to teleport around looking for him.  Good thing they’re Psychic.

Sketch seems like a Jirachi boy, for some reason.  I know Jirachi has very little to do with paint or any of that but neither does any other Legendary so shush.

Wind is thankfully easy and can have Kyogre.  Yes, Primal is an option.  All the weather manipulation!

Steam is surprisingly tricky?  I really want to give him a ghost, but I also really want to give him a steel.  Ghost Zelda versus Spirit Train.  Hmm.  I think... ghost, probably, so heeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyy look who’s got a Giratina!

Shadow is not hard, at all.  He gets Darkrai, they’re both hopelessly misunderstood, a bit spooky, but so very cool.

Oni... gets an Eternatus.  Because those stat totals are ridiculous and also I’m pretty sure this is the only Legendary with the reputation of literally destroying the world, which I’m thinking puts these two on pretty even footing!

Rune can have Cresselia, because she has the oh-so-convenient association of memory and mind-healing and really, sometimes this stuff just decides itself.

RSE can have Entei, Suicune, and Raikou respectively.  Seems to work better than any other Trio.

Lux gets Mewtwo, probably because their combined lack of chill is amazing.  He’s angry, Mewtwo is angry, they’re perfect for each other.

Lyric... would have gotten Meloetta had I not already assigned it.  Gah.  But as a secondary choice... I dunno, Victini?  Meloetta just fits him so perfectly.  I think I may need to redesign Mask and Ocarina’s sub for their magical instrument of reality bending... there certainly can’t be two Meloettas.

And lastly, my OC boys!  Codex, I’m gonna give a Calyrex, because look at the size of that noggin there’s no way it isn’t obscenely intelligent.  And Wraith gets a Marshadow, because small and cute but unexpectedly spooky, until it turns out that it can hit like a tank and then it’s just all the way spooky.

[hollysoda]

BedeHop Headcanons: Part 1

I’m finally posting on here haha. Anyways, this account will be full of rambles based around whatever I’m fixated on (at the moment, Pokemon SWSH). Most of these will be headcanon/scenarios based on various ships

Who worries about what they’ll look like when they’re older?

Bede is very focused on mainting a perfect appearance. The thought of turning into an old wrinkly man scares him. Hop constantly reminds him that he’ll love him no matter what he looks like.

Who hogs the blanket?

Hop. He’s a fidgeter in the bed so usually ends up in a burrito, leaving poor Bede in the cold.

Who eats the others uneaten pizza crusts?

Hop is disgusted by how Bede refuses to eat the crust. It’s either he eats it or tries to force feed it to the fussy brat.

Who is more likely to cry over a sad book/movie?

Hop only cries when a Pokemon in a movie gets badly hurt. Bede finds it hilarious.

Who talks smack while playing video games?

Hop gets easily frustrated when playing video games, especially against Bede. He’s very competitive and that sometimes leads to him shouting at Bede, leading to petty arguments. It doesn’t help that Bede always playfully mocks him.

Who sings along with the radio?

Bede enjoys singing. He rarely does it but when one of his favourite songs comes on the radio the temptation to sing along is unbearable. Hop has at least 5 videos on his phone of Bede singing to the radio (which he recorded in secret)

Who would enter them both in a talent show contest?

Hop definitely. He’d probably try to persuade Bede to sing with him or something. Bede would be completely against the idea though.

Who would accidentally set the kitchen on fire while cooking?

Honestly, both of them are pretty good chefs. Hop can make a killer curry and Bede is amazing at making cakes (Opal taught him). However, Hop is more likely to leave something on the stove, get sidetracked and completely forget about it

Who would throw the other in the pool?

Bede doesn’t like getting his hair wet so of course Hop is gonna lift his boyfriend up and dump him in the water

Who shops for groceries?

Neither. They’re both too busy with work/the gym so they just order them online. If they do end up having to go to the store it’s usually Bede because Hop is an irresponsible little child who would buy a trolley full of nuggets

Who GETS RID OF the spiders? (Joltiks/Dewpider)

Hop is used to dealing with bug type Pokemon when he’s out on the field doing research so if a lil Joltik sneaks into the house he leads it back outside. Bede was a psychic type trainer so he doesn’t like bugs.

Who is the morning/night person?

Bede has gotten used to getting up early in the morning to open up the gym and get ready for the first challenger. Sometimes this means leaving Hop to wake up alone. On the other hand, Hop can stay up until 3am studying/working. Sometimes Bede might stay up with him but most of the time he ends up passing out nearby

Who proposes? 👀

I can honestly see both of them doing it. Bede would be more blunt, holding the ring out and avoiding eye contact. He’d be so embarrassed about doing it that most of the words coming out of his mouth would seem pretty rude to most people (thankfully Hop’s used to it). Hop would be more confident. He’d speak clearly and as calmly as possible whilst Bede has a mental breakdown. Either way, they’d say yes and have a really pretty wedding (might make a separate post for that one day)

[kileyrose-2003]

How Rebecca characters would react to you saying you love them:

A/N: Hello lovelies! I hope you all are doing well and I've missed you all. It's been forever since I've done any writing and I'm sorry. I'm slowly getting to all your fics and request. I mentioned I was having problems with my mental health during the spring. I still am and life has thrown way more twist and turns than I've expected in the past few months. But I'm learning to manage.

This post is for my dear friend @merci-bitch who has been with me through all the twist and turns and dealing with all my craziness. Words can't describe how much it means to me. I love you and thank you for everything. I hope you enjoy and take care of yourselves lovelies!

Rose

Rose has telepathy and many other psychic abilities

Unlike various members of The True, she can read you like a book

At this point in time you'd be a rube

Not to mention she's very smug

She's hot and she knows it

And Rose has no shame

Like I've mentioned before, Rose internalizes affection

She loves The True Knot but her moments of greatest affection are strictly towards you and Crow

So you'd have to tell her in private to get at least a not so cold reaction out of her

But she wouldn't be surprised

She'd smile at you teasingly

Strut towards you with her posture like that of a queen

She'd run her fingers through your hair and smile

Place a small little kiss on your forehead

"I know."

Do not underestimate this woman's cockiness. Crow is not the only one who has a god complex in The True Knot.

And Rose has the greatest one of them all

She won't return the words back at first

Rose has seen so many people come and go over the years

But she will show you how much she loves you and let's say you won't be a rube much longer

Riza

Riza is seductive as hell

But like Rose, she shares her softer moments towards you and only you.

And she also knows she's hot

The two of you would be at home together with Riza looking lovely as always

You'd be in the beginning stages of dating and either be watching a movie together or just cuddling

Riza is totally the big spoon

She'd be a few drinks in and gets bored

"Come darling, let's go have some fun together!"

"Define fun."

This would lead to the two of you stumbling upstairs to Riza's room

She'd be throwing her clothes all over the place as she tried to dress you up

"Oh come on Y/n! Try this dress. You'd look beautiful wearing this to the club."

"Riza, you are drunk."

"And?"

As you continue to rant on about how she did not need another drink her lips would come crashing down on yours

It's unexpected but a very good type of unexpected

By the time the two of you would pull away from the kiss, you'd both be panting

"I love you."

Like Rose she's smug, but it's a grateful smug that leads to her lifting you up that way your legs are wrapped around your waist

"I know and I love you too."

It's a lustful 'I love you' but she does mean

She'd show you how much she loves you too

Kathleen

Now Kathleen is the wild card here because she'd be the one to say I love you first

She's a bit of a drinker and loves a good party

But she is very in touch and has a good sense of how she's feeling over all

She's been in enough relationships to knos when she cares and doesn't care for a person

But she cares for you deeply, you'd know each other from the time you were kids

The two of you would be at a party together and she'd be drunk as hell, she loves her martini's

Kathleen would be kissing you all over and trying to flirt with different people

But you're the one who keeps her under control and stops her from doing anything she'd regret the next morning

You are the responsible one in this relationship but you don't mind

At the end of the night she'd barely be able to walk and she'd stay at your apartment overnight

Subconsciously she'd curl up next to you in her sleep and you'd give a small smile, gently caressing her hair and you'd hold it for her the next morning when she experiences one of her worser hangovers

You wouldn't leave her side and it would mean alot to her

The 'I love you' slips from her lips softly as she starts to recover, fighting on the verge of sleep

You'd happily return the words and place a small kiss on her temples, making her give you that cheeky smile you learned to love

The next time you see her, she'd make sure to have something special set up for you to really reinforce her words

Jenny

With Jenny it would be a very unexpected I love you

You were one of the first people who made friends with her when she decided to tour with the circus

The two of you would go shopping together, have dinner, sing, etc.

So naturally the two of you were close

You knew her like the back of your hand and in return she knew you the same

You never thought you'd grow feelings for her but over time you couldn't help to

Her voice was just so pretty and the way she looked at you made you feel like you were the only person in the world she had eyes for

You knew she thought she loved Phineas though

And that hurt like hell but yet you still couldn't help but have a soft spot for her

She'd come to you crying after Phineas turned her away and you'd be there to comfort her

Even though you really wanted to tell her I told you so

After she'd calm down from crying, you'd hug her for a little

Murmuring a small 'I love you' in her ear

She'd move away from you confused

"You do?"

You were so scared she'd push you away in that moment

She didn't know what to think at first, as part of her was afraid she'd end up hurt again and she was confused

But she gave you the chance and she was glad she did

When she left the circus, she took you with her and neither of you ever looked back

Dinah

Dinah has been hurt alot

But all she really wants is someone to love, who loves her in return just as much or even more

She seriously needs a hug

You met her a little after she gave birth and she always seemed a little sad

You were one of the very few people who treated her with kindness in a long time so she immediately grew close to you

Neither of you had a lot of spare time, as you were trying to balance spending time with her and support your family

Life in the biblical period in Egypt was not easy for women by any means

But the moments the two of you could spend together, you'd cherish

The day you told Dinah you loved her, she was having a really rough day

She felt like she was trapped and alone, and she wanted her son

So you sat there with her, hugging her while she cried

You murmured sweet nothings in her ear, trying to sooth her

And that's when the I love you slipped out

She was scared at first but after sinking it in, for the first time in forever she smiled

She'd almost immediately return the I love you and it made you so happy

The two of you had to sneak around to see each othet after that but every day and second of it was worth it

Rebecca

Rebecca would not be shocked at all

She's a natural snogger and loves to hug people

So the two of you would have a very, openly affectionate friendship

You've known each other for forever

The two of you would be out doing a promotional interview for a movie you both were working on together

And because the two of your personalities blend together, you both would be giggling the entire time

There's zero seriousness with either of you in the same room

Which made Rebecca kind of glad because people on the film set were trying to hit on you, and she distracted you from that

Eventually the interviewer would get a bit annoyed and leave the room for a quick break

The two of you would be laughing still

"If we're like this now can you imagine what we're going to be like when we're old?"

"Same sense of humor but fifty years later. He's right though. You'll still be as pretty as you are today."

You'd give a tiny aww and that's when the I love you would slip out

She'd give your cheek and immediately turn the I love you with her typical, bright smile

God, she's seriously so cute

Ilsa

The I love you that you gave Ilsa was a very scary one and highly unexpected

The two of you have known each other for years and have been close friends

You got paired up for a mission

It was supposed to be an easy in and out

The two of you thought you had everything under control, the room cleared out

And then you got shot

Once in the leg and other time in the stomach

Ilsa immediately took care of the person who hurt you

But she was panicking because you were bleeding bad

She called for help but was honestly scared you weren't going to make it

It was then that you told her you loved her

Ilsa is a strong woman but she did shed a tear or two

"I love you too. Everything is going to be fine. I promise."

When the ambulance finally got there and it was time for them to put you on the stretcher, she refused to leave you

She sat with you the entire time, holding your hand and trying to get you to stay with her

Once you got to the hospital you immediately had to be taken for surgery

You made it through with no complications

When you woke up the next morning she was still sitting by your side and you were so grateful.

You loved her too much to ever want to be away from her again

And she felt the same way. She was just so glad you were okay.

[lovemesomesurveys]

This may or may not get personal. Are you ready? Ya’ll know I already share quite a bit in my survey answers, so.

How old are you turning on your next birthday? 32. D:

Do you have a favourite film, if so, what is it and why? I have many. Hard to choose just one favorite, there’s a lot of great films. 

When was the last time you had sex? Never.

Did you want it, or did the other person want it?

Have you ever had that one friend who complained about everything? I have. It got quite exhausting.

Were you ever that friend? I really try not to be a complainer and keep a lot of it to myself. At least to other people, ha I complain a lot in surveys and Twitter. That’s different, though, it’s complaining to the void.

What is the next film you want to see in the theaters? So many movies were supposed to come out that I wanted to see, but who knows when theaters will be able to safely open back up. A lot of movie release dates keep getting pushed back as well, so there wouldn’t be too many movies to see right now anyway. 

Be honest, did Fifty Shades of Grey arouse you in any way? I can’t believe I read that series, first of all. Second of all, I will admit to feeling some type of way at times :X I saw the first movie and it was so cringe that I didn’t see the others.

What does your sibling(s) call you? Steph.

Do you believe in God or Fate or neither? I believe in God.

Do you have any close friends that are the opposite sex that your significant other dislikes? I don't have a significant other or friends, so no problem there.

Do you honestly believe everything happens for a reason? Why or why not? I do.

Did you ever play Truth or Dare? Yeah.

If so, what was the worse thing that has happened because of it? I never chose dare, so nothing. The few times I’ve played didn’t last long either, so not much happened anyway. It got old quickly.

Ever played seven minutes in heaven? No.

Do you believe in reincarnation? Why or why not? No.

The Hunger Games or The Maze Runner? The Hunger Games. I never read or saw The Maze Runner.

Have you ever been to Australia? No.

If not, would you like to go? Sure.

To what state would you like to go in Australia? Hmm. Perhaps Queensland or New South Wales.

What about America, have you ever been? I’m American. 

If not, would you like to go to America?

To what state would you like to go in America? There’s several states I’d like to visit, one being New York.

Has there ever been a time you were scared of a stranger? Yes. I’ve felt uncomfortable in public situations where I got bad vibes or sensed something bad.

Has anyone you’ve known claimed to be psychic? No.

Did/do you believe them? --

Have you ever had a beer bong? No.

What about a bong? No.

Do you even smoke? Not anymore, but I did a few times in my early 20s.

Is anything annoying you right now? Not at the current moment.

Any friends who are constantly venting about their boyfriend?

Have you ever been ice-skating? Nope.

Does the sound of rain at night help you sleep? I love the sound of rain, but I always have earphones in at night so I wouldn’t hear it.

Have you ever seen an albino person, in person? Yes.

Have you ever worn a pair of scrubs? No.

Do you obsessively apply lip-gloss or lip balm? Nope. I should apply it at least sometimes because my lips do get dry often.

Anything in your room that you’re hiding from your parents or someone else? Nah.

Have you ever walked into a massive cobweb? EW, yes. 

When you can tell that someone’s lying, do you call them out on it? Ehhh, it depends.

Have you ever hallucinated? No.

How are you? Been feeling under the weather the past week.

What would you say is your strongest felt emotion right now?   I just feel meh.

Have you ever felt abandoned?   Yes.

Where are you? I’m in my room.

Have you ever wished on a shooting star?   No. I’ve never even seen one.

Did it come true?  

Are you talking to anyone at the moment?   Nope.

What’s been the worst part of this day? Today was okay.

Do you have trust issues?   No. My issue is that I just have a hard time opening up to people and expressing myself. I don’t like the focus and attention on me and talking about myself, despite what you might think since I do a lot of that in surveys. But to me it’s like writing in a diary or shouting into the void even though people obviously read and see my answers. However, I’m not talking to someone and expressing my feelings and thoughts face to face and getting a response (though sometimes people comment on something I said, but you get what I mean) or seeing their reaction or anything. It’s different.

Have you ever found an arrow head?   No.

Who is with you?   My family is home, but they’re all in their rooms asleep.

What can you not stop thinking about?   A lot of things. My mind is a jumbled mess. Stuff plays on a loop.

Is there anything you want or need right now?   I’m hungry, but I don’t want to make my nightly bowl of ramen quite yet. I have a schedule I like to keep, so I make it around the same time every night. I still have like an hour and a half to wait.

Do have faith in yourself?   No. :/

What about your goals?   I don’t really have any. :/

Who last encouraged you to better yourself?   My family has always been encouraging and supportive and want the best for me.

Do you forgive easily?   I do. 

What has changed about you recently?   Nothing. That’s the problem. 

Anything your excited about or looking forward to?   No. I’m sad that last year around this time my family and I were planning our trip to Disneyland and we were super excited. It was fun having something like that to look forward to. This year there isn’t anything.

Have you ever been called a slut or whore?   Just jokingly with friends.

What was the last thing that aggravated you?   Mehh. I just get in these moody and irritable moods a lot for seemingly no reason and because of that anything can irritate me.

In what part of your life so far, have you learnt the most about yourself?   I have in some ways these past few years. Are you more sad or happy right now?   Sad.

Have you ever been in a fist fight?   Nope.

Are you comfortable?   I’m alright. 

Who do you miss?   My loved ones who have passed.

Are things easier said than done? That’s true for a lot of things.

What aggravates you most about people in general?   The close mindedness and people just following along with the herd without looking into things themselves and forming their own opinions. Too many people just go along with stuff and they don’t seem to know what’s really going on. So much misinformation gets spread that way, too.

Are your ears pierced?   Yeah, my earlobes are.

What did you last say out loud?   “Goodnight.”

What are you waiting on?   I’m waiting to make my ramen.

What’s on the t.v. at the moment?   King of Queens.

Do you like anything about being angry?   No? It’s not a pleasant feeling.

Who did you last hug? My mom.

Did you have a summer job this year?   I’ve never had a summer job. Or a job, ever.

What do you smell right now?   Nothing at the moment.

Where do you wish you were?   I’m fine where I’m at.

The last thing you did before this?   My mom and I caught up on one of our shows we watch.

Do you get surprises often?   No.

Name a crime you have committed?   Downloaded music and movies. I’m real rebel.

Do you tell people when they get on your nerves? I have when it was my brother, but typically no I don’t. 

Do you have any regrets?   I have many. :/

Are your feelings hurt easily? I’m sensitive. Sometimes more than other times.

What is your stance on keeping gifts or mementos from past relationships? I’m someone who keeps stuff like that.

Have you ever hooked up with someone that one of your close friends had already dated or hooked up with? Nope.

Have you ever disowned/been disowned by a family member? No.

What's the most expensive piece of clothing you have? Did you buy it yourself? My Adidas tracksuits and sweatshirts that were gifted to me from my parents.

What brings out the best in you? Hmm.

Who is your closest platonic friend of the opposite sex?

Have you ever taken a break in a relationship with the intention of getting back together? How did it go? No, I haven’t been in that situation. 

When was the last time you were ill? I feel crappy a lot of the time, but the last time I was sick-sick was back in October. 

How do you think your first relationship shaped who you are as a partner now? I haven’t had a real relationship to be honest. At 31 years old and very little experience with that kind of thing, that certainly will play a role if I do ever have a relationship. 

What is the worst thing you've done to another person? I completely withdrew and distanced myself from my friends a few years ago. I’m such a shitty person.

Who is your favourite protagonist of the same sex? Leslie Knope or Lorelai Gilmore. <<< Lorelai Gilmore is definitely one of mine, too. I have many favorites, though.

Were you popular in high school? What was your reputation like? Haha no, not at all. 

Have you ever sent someone naked pictures? No.

What app needs to be invented ASAP? I don’t know. There seems to be an app for everything.

Have you named any of your posessions? Stuff like my stuffed animals.

Have you always known your sexual orientation or did something happen to make you realize it? It wasn’t something I thought about until I started getting into boys and having crushes, which was when I was in the 3rd grade.

What make up do you wear on a regular basis? I don’t wear makeup anymore.

What was the hardest part of your last break up? When Joseph decided he was done with whatever it was we had going on and that he didn’t feel the same way I did and had no interest in being in an actual relationship with me, I took it very hard because I had been very clear and open with my feelings and that was very hard for me to do. I laid it all out there, mustering up the courage to do so, and got rejected. He completely played and used me, knowing how I felt, and it hurt. A lot.

What brought you out of the hardest period in your life? I’m still going through it. These past few years have really done a number on me.

Have you ever deleted your Facebook or other social media? Nope.

Have you ever lost or gained weight very quickly? What happened? I became underweight a few years ago due to health reasons and I haven’t been able to gain weight and get back to a healthy weight. 

[szopenhauer]

What was your last dream about? pamiętam tylko tyle, że M. powinna uważać na jej byłego

Would you like to build/design your own house? yes

Do you have a cherished childhood teddy bear? it’s not really a teddy but yeah

Are you psychic in any way? it seems

Are you a good dancer? meh

Are you a good singer? nooo

Are you a good cook? not the worst

Are you a good artist? maybe

Are you a good listener? try to be 

Are you a good public speaker? but don’t like to 

Are you a good babysitter? might be but hate that

Are you a good dresser? have my own style

Are you a good comedian? I’m funny :P

Are you a good cleaner? not good enough

Are you a good actor? I am

Are you a good writer? just like to write

Do you ever get chills & goosebumps when you listen to music? tell me about it...

What was the last song that had that effect on you? not sure which was last

Do you know what any of your siblings did over the weekend? I don’t care

Was the last book you read a hardback or paperback? paperback

What was the last thing you required the use of a spoon for? I was eating breakfast

The last time you ate something, was it in a bowl or on a plate? neither XD

Can you recall the last time you held hands with someone? I can

What was the last thing that made your heart melt? hmm...

Can you recall the last time you visited a bookshop? not the exact day but yep

Did you purchase anything? I don’t think so

Have you been wearing homemade masks or store-bought ones? both

Do you call yourself stupid a lot? sometimes

Are you listening to music right now? not rn

What is your newest favorite website? aliexpress?

Do you have a headache right now? had before today

What month is your birthday, and what month would u change it to if you could?  February and would like June, July or August that’s why I will spend my name day during summer instead of spring with my sister

Have you ever had to use an epi pen? not yet

Do you know the names of 3 of your neighbors? (list if you can): personal

What was the last grocery store you shopped at?

Do memories from your past come back to haunt you ? frequently

Have you ever seen an angel? or a ghost

Have you ever seen a demon? that time in a mirror?...

What color was the last sweatshirt you wore? grey

What was the last act of creativity you displayed? Vinnie’s tiny bird next to her signature?

Do you ever find yourself just writing/typing out your feelings? my tumblr is full of this shit

Whose house were you at last, besides your own? my current partner’s

Do you like your teeth? not really

Does piano music tend to calm you down? wouldn’t say so

What’s something you need to get done soon? ugh...

Is your best friend awake right now? they are

If I came to your house, could I find any kind of chocolate? ask my mother

Who was the last person to upload a picture with you in it? M.

Do you ever wear sleep masks when you sleep or shower caps when you shower? neither

Don’t tell me lies, so where’s your man? where’s Nat? XD

Have you ever had a best friend who was of the opposite sex? dad

Has anyone said they love you in the last week? yasss

Have you ever kissed under water? hell no

Have you kissed anyone whose name starts with a M? hahaha

Would you kiss the last person who texted you, on the lips? done and I hopefully will

Camping with a ton of friends or hotel with a few friends? hotel 

Could you go the rest of your life without a cigarette? absolutely

Have you ever wanted something you couldn’t have? like health

How is your boyfriend/girlfriend doing and where are they now? she’s angry, has a flu and she’s working

What was the last topic you read about? DID?

Do you prefer Windows or Mac? Windows

What’s the best amusement park ride you’ve ever been on? I’m not a fan of rides tbh

Would you know how to read a house blueprint? partially?

Do you keep notes on your phone? What sort of things do you write? used to on my old cell

Do you remember much from high school? tought so

Has anyone ever come out to you? yup

What was the last album you listened to in full? Red army choir or Anastasis?

Do you have Disney+? we don’t

Have you ever sent a package or letter to a foreign country? postcards

How many jobs do you have on your resume? 0

Are you comfortable with leaving the house without any makeup on?: I don’t wear makeup

Do you have any expensive hobbies?: if I had money...

What length do you like to keep your nails at?: short

Have you ever felt physical pain in a dream?: but not as much as Nat 

Have you ever had Christmas carolers come to your house and sing for you?: when I was a kid

What’s your favorite Studio Ghibli film?: Porco Rosso?

What did you learn from your last failed relationship?: can we not talk about it...

What’s something on your to-do list that never actually gets done?: I’m a huge procrastinator

Have you ever been really passionate about something but then lost interest? If so, what was it?: collages

What’s the worst thing about being male/female (whichever you are)?: period, being able to get pregnant and have female kinds of cancer etc.

What movie has the best special effects?: I’m into practical special effects more than cgi but... there’s too many to name

When did you last have a vision test?: ages ago 

[luki-fanfic]

Dr. Stone Fanfic: Crossed Your Mind - Part 1

Yes I know, it’s not KHR.  But I’m liking this fandom and it’s proving frustratingly effective at distracting me from my other works, so bear with me.

WARNING: suicide of OC, and some minor manga spoilers (end of the stone wars)

—

“Remember Gen, you must always give them enough reason to doubt.”

It’s the mantra his grandmother had uttered every day, before he’d head to school. They’d lived on the outskirts of the town, inside a traditional Japanese home, and the family bitterly held on to every acre around them they could find, no matter how good the offer that came.

It was so isolated, you could almost pretend you were the only one for miles.

Almost, anyway.  And Gen enjoyed the quiet.  It certainly didn’t last long when he had to walk into town, and sound started to echo in his head.  While the citizens and his fellow classmates kept their voices low and polite, their inner voices were no such thing.

‘God, when is he going to call me?’

‘Okay, so if I get A Meal today and the C Meal tomorrow, maybe I can afford two B meals-’

“Ugh, I’m so not ready for that test today.  I’m so screwed!”

‘Dammit, I’m going to be late again!’

Gen winces and resists the urge to cover his ears.

Physic powers are a real burden sometimes.

—

In a place like Japan, filled with overpopulated cities, telepathy is not so much a gift as it is a curse.  It normally runs down his mother’s side, but Gen happened to be one of the lucky males to have it passed down. While movies and comic books might suggest to the common man on the street that having real life super-powers would be cool, Gen will quite happily tell them otherwise.

For one thing, it doesn’t turn off.  It’s a sense, as much as sight and taste, and Gen’s only saving grace is that his own seems to be limited to hearing range at the moment.  His grandmother hears significantly further, and his mother…

Well, she’s not hearing much of anything any more.  But it had been far.

His father does the best he can, raising Gen with his grandmother.  For someone without mind-reading, his father had been a rock.  A psychologist, who worked regularly with police, and had studied ESP as a hobby.  It’s how he’d met his mother, and his days spent analysing witnesses and criminals made him a natural at reading people.  

“If I didn’t know he couldn’t read minds, I’d honestly think he could,” his mother had told at age five, in one of her better moments. ��“He knew everything I was thinking just from a smile and a twitch of my hand.”

She wasn’t wrong, and it’s quite frustrating to grow up when both of your parents are impossible to lie to.  On the plus side, they couldn’t lie to him either, and his younger memories are fully of happy moments.

Unfortunately, those became a lot less when his mother’s gift spiked.

—

It gets worse in your mid twenties.  That’s the one thing that seems constant. While the radius remains almost tolerable through childhood and the teens, by 25, the mental reading spikes.  How far varies, but both his mother and grandmother had been brutally honest on what his future entails.  

His grandmother is the only one in the family with the gift to make it past thirty for generations.  And she hasn’t left this house since she was 23.  Not even the threat of bombs during the war had pried her out.  She’d tried to get her daughter to do the same, but she’d ran off to university, positive she could handle it.

At first, she’d been fine.  She’d studied, she’d met Gen’s old man – who found her ability fascinating, and could keep up with her despite his lack of it.  They’d been married in six months, and Gen came along a year later.  When he was two, they learned he’d inherited his mother’s gift, and celebrated his luck.

He was five when his mother started screaming, with the entire city suddenly pounding into her head, and they’d all packed up and moved to the house in the forest while her sanity bled out her eardrums.

Her mother had seen it coming, and tried to help traditionally.  Meditation, and long walks into the country.  Gen, his mother and father, would spend their weekends hiking in the forest, camping in the wild, trying to find areas that were isolated enough to make his mother’s headache tolerable.  Gen is not the outdoors type, but he appreciates the lessons as things he’ll need to learn for his own safety.  If he’s honest, there’s something soothing about the wild – while it frustrates his father, he likes to take off his shoes and wander barefoot when he can.  It genuinely makes him feel at peace.

Unfortunately, the same cannot be said for his mother.  The trips only help so much. Japan is a populated country, and it’s nearly impossible to find yourself outside of civilisation.  While Gen might find it quiet, neither woman ever finds true success.

His father had tried to help her through modern means.  Reduced his hours and thrown himself into parapsychology.  Prescribed any medication that might possibly help.  Sometimes it did.  But she kept getting stronger. Sometimes, the voices were so loud, she couldn’t even tell who was saying what.  Her mental state is so bad at times, his father sometimes thinks to himself she might have genuinely developed schizophrenia.  Which is a dangerous thing to think in a house of telepaths.

On the worst nights, his mother will attack his father, both with her fists, and her words.

“You hate me!” she screams, hands trying to claw at his father’s face.

“I don’t, I love you!” his father screams back, pinning her hands down.  

From his room, Gen just turned and fell into bed, burying deeper into his pillow, pretending that would drown out the words not being spoken.  

Once upon a time nobody in his family ever thought to lie.

But that was a long time ago.

—

If there’s one thing Gen’s ability has taught him, it’s this.  Everybody lies.

It’s a universal constant.  A lot of people don’t even seem to know they’re doing it, but you can’t hide your true feeling from him.  He learns quite young to never trust a smile, or a tear.  He sees and hears first hand someone uttering words of affection while screaming abuse in their head, seen teachers feign affection for eager students when they’re mentally begging them to vanish so they can go drinking.

‘I like you.’

‘It’s no trouble at all.’

‘It’s not that impressive, really.’

‘Gen, I promise, I’ll never hurt you, my baby boy.’

Lies. Lies. Lies.

—

When Gen was eight, he woke up to hear his mother singing in her head.  A happy, ditzy tune, that almost made him hopeful that today was a good day.  That this set of drugs had finally calmed down her hysterics.  In the back of the house, he can hear his grandmother thinking something quite similar, and they laugh to themselves at their need to be hopeful. It’s a thought that stays with them, right up until his mother’s musings cut straight out, leaving frightful silence.

His grandmother screams out loud.  Gen doesn’t, merely jumping out of bed and running towards his mother’s bedroom.

She’s in the cupboard.  She’d used a scarf.  Gen thinks it might have been one he gave her for a birthday, once upon a time.  His grandmother tries to usher him away, but the same thought is going through her head.

His father was away during the incident, and after the funeral, starts looking at Gen differently.  He doesn’t say why – he doesn’t have to.  Gen doesn’t need telepathy to know that his father has suddenly realised his son has a bomb trigger in his head, and his police work falls to the wayside, focused completely on looking at psychic research, looking for something, anything, that might save him.  Gen leaves him to it – it means they speak over phone while he travels, and it keeps things quiet and less depressing at home.

His grandmother has always been the bulk caretaker for him, and that definitely doesn’t change when his mother passes.  If anything, life becomes easier, because they don’t have to worry about her episodes.  A thought that makes both of them feel overwhelmingly guilty, so they never mention it.

To recover, his grandmother teaches him meditation and yoga, ways to calm his mind, and digs out decks of cards to show him tricks.  Given their natural talent, some of ancestors were known in the magic circles – when the world was smaller, and their skills not quite as strong – they worked as magicians, or magicians assistants.  She’s happy to give Gen a hobby that keeps his mind of…well, his mind.  Playing the magician is what allows their family to survive in this modern era - a way for people to explain away their uncanny ability to know all.

Then, his grandmother dies when he’s fourteen, and he’s the only voice in his head for now.

—

When he turns sixteen, he moves to Tokyo, and gets an agent.

His father thinks he’s an idiot.  Begs him to reconsider.  In this day and age, Gen can still be home schooled, and go to university online.  He can have an entire life without ever having to leave their little corner of the world.

Gen is mature enough to admit he might have a point – both of them understand that he has a very tight deadline on his life.  But he wont live like his grandmother, caged in her own house for her own sanity.  And his mother had done everything right and still ended up the way she did. Why spend years studying for a job he might not have the mental faculties to do in a decade?  If that’s his inevitable fate, he’s at least going to enjoy the time he has left and spend it being rich and adored.  

Knowing that people lie, is his strength.  Knowing precisely what they lie about, is something he can use.  While his father might suggest using it to better society, Gen won’t take the risk.  Too many dark and dangerous people to interact with, and the concept is still laughed upon in a lot of enforcement agencies.  Entertainment is far safer – he won’t even be the first in his family to use his skills this way.

The term is ‘Mentalist.’  An entertainer who feigns mind reading or other psychic abilities.  His grandmother had taught him some family methods and the basic card tricks, so he has a pretty good base to start on.  A natural talent at mental tricks, and long, painful hours in a cheap apartment, trying to block out his neighbours voices until he can manipulate a deck backwards and forwards, get him his first gig.  His attractive features, and a knack for knowing just what to say, get him his first TV performance.

A year later, and he’s doing full on shows to a sold out crowd.  Up to a thousand people, all watching him.  All loving him both in their applause and heads.

It’s a drug.  A beautiful, wonderful drug that makes up for living in one of the worlds most over populated cities.

Granted, there’s always a few that don’t enjoy it.  Gen takes pleasure in trying to seek them out whenever he needs an audience member to help him.  The ones that are looking for the trick – Gen does try to keep his act within the realms of possible most of the time.  There needs to be some way for people to guess how he does it, but every now and then, he’ll show off.  Get the biggest disbeliever in the room on stage, and mentally take him apart.  The look of shock, of horror, and astonishment, as this simple being had their entire world view shaken.  When the revelation that they can’t tell anyone because they won’t be believed crosses their mind.  It’s a beautiful thing - Gen thinks he’s personally made at least a dozen sceptics full on psychic believers by this point.

On one occasion, it’s another celebrity.  He’s been booked for a special on exceptional young Japanese citizens, and he’s there for both his psychology and magic credentials.  The piece was fairly run of the mill, with one exceptions – a teen by the name of Shishio Tsukasa.

Although ‘teen’ is a bit of stretch – muscles like that shouldn’t be possible on someone that young.  He’s attending as an example of psychology in fighting – how the state of mind can improve anyone’s abilities. During his own display, Gen can’t deny he’s impressed.  Tsukasa’s mind is calm, and focused, and terrifyingly powerful.

But he also doesn’t believe in magic.  He looks over Gen with the usual polite respect that one in the media masters, but his dismissal of Gen’s talents rings clear as day to him.

As such, when the show cuts for a break, and the two of them are alone in the green room, Gen hides a vicious smirk behind a glass of water, and gets to work.  After a few moments of quiet contemplation, trying to block out the voices around them and focusing on Tsukasa’s own thoughts, he’s ready to go.

“How is dear little Mirai?”

The reaction is beautiful.  He waited until Tsukasa was drinking, and he has to fight back the smirk as the taller teen chokes on the liquid, hand trembling as he drops it to glare over at the mentalist.

Gen gives an innocent smile.

“It’s quite an impressive feat, to soldier all those medical bills on your own.  For what it’s worth, I can completely sympathise.”

That’s not even a lie.  Throwing yourself into work, desperately putting money together to help a family member that has no hope of ever getting better?

Oh, Gen can definitely sympathise.  Tsukasa however, doesn’t seem amused.

“How do you know about Mirai?” he asks, voice low.  Gen completely understands – the teen has gone to extraordinary lengths to keep his little sister’s state out of the media.  There’s only a handful of people who know the Strongest Primate High Schooler even has a sibling.  

“It is my business to know, Tsukasa-chan,” Gen offers, leaning back and resting his hand on one cheek.  “I make a point to know everything about everyone I deal with.  You’d be amazed at the secrets I know.”

“Is that a fact?” Tsukasa asks, body tense, and Gen grins.

“My dear Tsukasa-chan, my entire career is built on reading people,” he says.  “I am young, I am pretty, and I am new to the game.  On the one hand, it works for my brand, but on the other, people always think they can use me for their own good fortune.  If I don’t learn how to manipulate, how to get into the heads of people, I’d never survive.”

He flashes Tsukasa a dark smirk.

“I’m sure you understand this as well as I do.  This world is not fair one, but if you know that, you can still come out on top.”

Tsukasa stays silent, but gives a nod of comprehension, and Gen settles back, satisfied that the indifference in the fighter’s head has been quite firmly replaced with respect.

—

A few months later, Gen is sporting a new black and white hairstyle, and is running through a stage performance to a regular audience.  It’s a small crowd, and there’s nobody he can pick up that’s not genuinely enjoying his act, so there’s no need to psychologically gut anyone in the finale.  Everyone seems happy, and he’ll give them the best show he can to reward that.

Next week, he’ll probably show off, because his father will be attending.  Right now he’s in America, attending some medical conference.  Gen has only seen the man in person since he left for Tokyo three times, but they call regularly.  He’d come to see Gen perform twice, and once come just to yell at him, having taken great offence at Gen’s ‘psychology’ book, especially considering Gen hadn’t even finished High School – but Gen could have seen that coming without psychic powers.  No doubt, he’ll roll his eyes when Gen publicly dissects the biggest sceptic in the crowd for his finale, but then he’ll laugh, and take his famous son out to dinner, before going over the newest research he has in how to keep Gen’s mind sane.

Gen looks forward to it.  Even though he already knows his father has no faith whatsoever that they’ll find a cure in time, no matter what words he might offer.

He’s just completed his final act, one of the more standard ‘magical’ aspects of his performance, where he escapes from a box stabbed with knives, basking in the approving minds, when something dark and ominous hits him like a sledgehammer.

‘What’s happening?’

‘Ohmygodohmygodohmygod.’

‘Am I dying? What is this!’

His smile falters as the voices scream inside his head.  But before he can process the danger, his arms stiffen, his vision vanishes, and he has nothing left but the voices.

Oh god, there’s so many…

‘Is this part of the act?  I don’t like this!”

‘Mom!  I want my mom!’

‘Can anyone hear me!  Help me!’

‘Please!  I’m scared!’

‘HELP!’

He wants to scream. Wants to run away from this darkness and their screams.  But he’s as frozen as everyone else.

Has it finally happened?  Has he succumbed to his family’s curse?  He’s only 19, he supposed to have time left…

But there’s no answer, and the crying, sobbing, frantic minds don’t let up for hours.  But eventually, they start to quiet, and Gen becomes even more alarmed when he starts to realise he can pick out individual voices – the crowd thinning for unknown reasons.

It should be comforting, but with nothing to see, hear, smell…those voices are the only thing keeping him sane.  He cries every time a voice tapers off.

‘Stay!  Come back!’ he begs in his own head.  ‘Don’t leave me alone!’

He doesn’t know how long it takes for the last voice, a young woman whose last thoughts are of her fiancé, to drift away.  But the time after is horrifying.  He’s never been so alone.  There’s always been someone on the edge of his head.  This silence is terrifying.

So, when his own mind starts to drift away, its nothing but a relief.

—

Several thousand years later, he meets Shishio Tsukasa again.  The teen is even more impressive, and the army of stone behind him does not fill Gen with confidence.  Neither does his mental state –and Gen suddenly becomes exceedingly grateful his father would have been in America and is far, far away from him.

He is given clothing, which to his surprise is slightly more elaborate than everyone else, and based on traditional Japanese garb.  It’s the style he’s admitted in interviews and TV appearances to being his preference, and it doesn’t take much to realise he’s being buttered up.  Better clothes to elevate his position in Tsukasa’s new world.  The girl who made them is torn between being happy at making something creative, and being terrified of Gen’s existence. She knows exactly why Gen’s been revived, and she’s not happy about it.

Granted, Gen also knows why he’s been revived, but he can’t tell Tsukasa that.  Any more than he can tell him the one called Senku is still alive.  At this point, he’s not even supposed to know the scientist’s name, so he stays mum.

He’s given a tour of Tsukasa’s kingdom, the strange caves utterly alien to him.  It’s difficult to imagine that this is where Tokyo once stood.  Or that this simple little cave holds the key to their revival.  It’s there that he finds something truly phenomenal.  The date.

Tsukasa had told it to him, but he was still wrapping his head around the concept of what happened that it didn’t register.  But here it is, written on a tree, plain as day.  

Gen’s reeling. Someone was awake during the petrification?  The whole time?  And stayed coherent enough to keep track of the date?  Gen had stayed conscious longer than everyone because he had mental stimulation, and even he’s still iffy on exactly how long he was functioning.  The mental feat this must have taken…

He laughs long and hard in his head when he realises Tsukasa has revived him to track Senku down.  A man Gen suddenly realises he has to meet, no matter what.

So he plays along, trailing after Tsukasa, acting the role of shallow egoist, looking at his options and realising Tsukasa was his key to success in this new world – the person Tsukasa, and most of the modern world, believed he was – looking over Senku’s abandoned hut, and being directed to where Tsukasa had once left a strange blonde girl, only to return and find her missing.

Gen is given a fortnight to hunt down Senku or the village, or Tsukasa will send out a rescue team.  He’s rather surprised that Tsukasa is willing to let him go alone, but then again, a more censored version of his family’s hiking trips have also made it into his biography, so perhaps it’s just rationing resources.  And it does make Gen’s plans so much easier.

—

Once he’s stepped into the forest, and Tsukasa’s mind is no longer close enough to be heard, Gen immediately kicks off the primitive shoes he’d been offered, and sits in the crook of a tree to process what’s just happened.

The world is so quiet.  That’s the first thing he truly registers.  Now that he’s out of the Kingdom of Might, and away from the half dozen people up and running, it’s truly alien at how quiet his head is.  There is nothing but the sounds of wildlife in his ears, and not a single stray thought in his mind.

He hasn’t been this alone in years.  It’s kind of soothing…normal people don’t know how lucky they are, to have this every day.

But as much as he’d love to bask in this quiet, he somehow needs to track down this now infamous ‘Senku’ over untamed wilderness, and figure out a way back without issue.  While he has some outdoors experience, he had modern clothing and supplies on hand, and there’s no markers to help him out, or minds to pick up.

Thankfully, Senku and his blonde friend didn’t do much to cover their tracks. They’re faint from time, but he does manage to follow a trail, finding an old campfire, and then wheel tracks.  He also stumbles across a hot spring, which he admittedly spends a day at before moving on.

Between marking a trail, and his wrong turns, it takes four days before he comes across civilisation.  A beaten mud path that’s probably used by hunters, and when he follows it, he picks up the sound of an instrument, too melodic to be natural.  A few minutes later, he rests at the top of the hill, grinning at the village on the water.

The grin gets wider when he picks up an amazing smell too.  It’s not perfect, but that’s definitely ramen.  And the idea of eating something he didn’t have to gather himself is too good to pass up.

When he walks out of the forest, he settles on a grouping of rocks, just out of sight.  A passing glance at the locals make it clear his getup will stand out like sore thumb, so he needs to stay in observation mode.

Most of the village are hoarded around a bamboo cart, and everyone’s thoughts are filled with only one thing.  How phenomenal this strange food is. They’ve never tasted anything like it.

But there’s one mind that’s running at a frantic pace.  Gen’s almost taken aback – it’s practically speaking another language compared to the more simplistic thoughts around him.  The owner is going over the components of ramen, a string of insanely long chemical components, and most curious of all, counting seconds almost subconsciously.

Gen smiles.  

Hello Senku.

Now, how to approach?  The last time Senku met a fellow modern man, he was supposedly killed.  Gen can’t imagine he’ll be received with much trust.  Gen himself has gone and put together makeshift armour just in case the reaction is more extreme than he expects, so he should expect Senku to be at least that paranoid.

He’s still mulling it over, when an utterly adorable slip of a girl wearing a watermelon on her head hands him a bowl of ramen.  She’s so focused on handing food out, she doesn’t even seem to realise he’s not a villager. Or perhaps that mask is obscuring her eyes?

The ramen itself is…well it’s a painful example of why MSG is in so much food, but the sensation of eating something cooked, that’s been even a little bit processed, is a glorious feeling.  The general aura of delight and joy surrounding him definitely sweeten the bowl too.  One girl even thinks about how they should stretch the rules to get the stranger into the village if he cooks like this.

The teen that can only be Senku is starting to slow down at his cart, and the crowd is dispersing in order to eat, so Gen makes his move.  Something that will get Senku’s attention, but wont appear threatening.

“This ramen is making me wickedly thirsty,” he says with a smile.  “A cola would be great…”

[piccolina-mina]

Holding the Universe Together

Fandom: Roswell New Mexico

Characters: Maria Deluca, Max Evans

Inspo: Dia de Maria

“She wasn’t doing a thing that I could see, except standing there leaning on the balcony railing, holding the universe together.” - Salinger 

A/N: Pre-series Maria and Max. The brotp I need in my life. Freestyle, all errors are due to humanity and sleep-deprivation. 

—

Thwack

“First time’s a warning; next time it’s hitting one of you, got it?” Maria popped her gum while pointing the baseball bat at both rowdy, drunken patrons who were seconds away from a brawl.

“We’re closed now,” she feigned sweetness as she cocked her head to the side. “Now get outta here!”

She stared both men down as neither of them made a move towards the exit. She twirled the bat like a baton and was on her way around the counter when he found his voice in his drunken haze.

“The lady,” he shook his head to better clear his thoughts and assert some semblance of authority. “The lady told you to leave, gentlemen.”

Max glared at the two drunks until they had the right mind to retreat, and when they did, he laughed in delight; it worked.

Two Marias looked back at him.

“Thanks for the assist, newly appointed lawman Evans.” She went back to wiping down the counter. “I had it though.”

Was that sass? Yeah, it was probably sass. It had been a few years since high school, but even then, Maria could kill a man with her sass. It would be the sweetest kind of death though.

“The lady doth protests too much.”

He was pretty sure his words were slurring together, and he didn’t realize he had celebrated his new official role at the sheriff’s department so much. He didn’t normally drink a lot. That was something he left to Michael.

Maria came into focus again, and he realized that the real reason he avoided the Pony was she reminded him of Rosa – she reminded him of Liz.

He didn’t realize the mere thought had brought him to tears until warm hands were rubbing at his neck and face.

“Easy there, Evans,” Maria cooed. I think you had more than enough.“

She sounded so maternal, and it made him want to cry more. If she knew anything about how he affected her life, she wouldn’t be soothing him as if he were a child.

He couldn’t understand why she was in the first place, but she had this faraway look in those soulful brown eyes that made him think it wasn’t about him at all.

“Do you think she would be proud of me?” He asked before he could stop himself, and he cringed at how pathetic he sounded.

She knew. Maria always knew. He never bought into her and her mom being psychics or witches or whatever else the town liked to call them, but she had a certain intuition he couldn’t explain.

“Oh honey,” she smiled a sad smile and patted his hair. “I always had a soft spot for you, you know?”

He scoffed in disbelief since Isobel all but made him believe he was a dope who no one could ever appreciate, at least back in high school.

“You were supposed to be a writer, Evans,” she replied quietly. She rested her hip half sitting on the table and absentmindedly stacked his glasses for cleanup.

“You were supposed to travel the world,” he shot back. “You were supposed to sing.”

He watched her body tense, but he didn’t know if it was out of anger or surprise.

“How the heck did you know that?”

Surprise then.

“You mattered to Liz,” he said honestly with a shrug. “So you mattered to me.”

He studied her face. It was something he was getting better at with the new job. Her eyes were misty, and for a moment he could see a longing in them.

He never knew what held her back; Maria was too big for their small town, and he figured she would take off after high school.

He doesn’t know if she ever did, but if she had, she came back sooner than expected.

“The job, does it make you happy?” She asked. “Does it fulfill you?”

He thought about it for seconds too long, and his head lolled a little too far to the side; she suppressed a smirk. He could tell.

“I get to help people,” he says a little too loudly, and he overcompensates by whispering it again. “I get to help people, and I like that part a lot.”

She smiles down at him. “Then she’s proud of you.” She squeezes his hand and collects the cups.

“Does this make you happy? Does this fulfill you?” He asked, but when her hand stalled and her face scrunched up, he figured he screwed up again.

“Oh, oh, sorry. Please don’t cry,” he shoved damp bar napkins at her and reached for her face before dropping them awkwardly.

“I’m not about to cry, you dope,”  she laughed him off, and he thought maybe she was lying, but he was too inebriated to tell.

“Alright, Evans. Who am I calling for you? The dirty mechanic who is in here every other week or the bitchy socialite?”

He must have looked confused as hell because she took pity on him. “Why don’t you go wash up, and I’ll take you home.”

He nodded and stumbled to the bathroom for a splash of cold water before returning to the bar. The lights were mostly out.

Maria stood palms gripping the bar counter her head tilted into the phone pressed between her ear and shoulder blade.

“I’ll be home soon, Mimi,” her voice was a higher pitch as if she was hiding how exhausted she sounded. She also sounded worried.

“Did you get the food I left you? No, mom. I’m not babying you. You’re right, I was just checking in. I’m making a quick stop, and I’ll be home shortly. No, not that type of stop. Fine, it’s that type of stop. He’s tall dark, handsome and wears a uniform. Whole shebang. I’ll tell you all the details.”

She hung up and leaned forward onto the bar and exhaled. He felt bad for impeding on her moment, but then without even turning back around to look at him, she asked: “Are you ready officer tall, dark, and handsome?”

He stumbled in surprised, and she was by his side propping him up. “Easy there, cowboy.”

“I’m s-sorry, ” he stuttered leaning into her more than he wanted.

“I don’t give this special treatment to just anyone. You should be flattered, Evans,” she grunted under his weight. “You were always one of the sweet ones, and no worries, I’m not taking you home to ravish you.”

She laughed when his eyes went wide, and his cheeks flushed upon realizing she knew he was eavesdropping after all.

The night air did him some good, but Maria stayed tucked beneath him like a toy puppy. She was small, the way Liz was small. But she was strong enough to hold up his frame, and as she helped him get in he wondered why he never bothered befriending Maria.

She was a good friend and a nurturer, and he realized that in some ways they had a lot in common.

He saw the medical paperwork on the seat – endless papers which mostly had Mimi Deluca’s name all over them, and it was beginning to make sense why Maria may have remained in Roswell and at the ripe age of 23 was running her family bar alone.

“No one knows what’s wrong with her, "she said softly as they cruised along. "The doctors don’t even listen.”

“I’m sorry,” he responded sincerely. He reached out and squeezed her hand, and she squeezed it back. “She would be proud of you too. She loved you so much.”

“Yeah, I miss her,” she said with such sadness he wanted another drink to drown out the guilt.

She switched the radio on and Bon Jovi’s “Living On a Prayer” flooded the car. She began singing at the top of her lungs, and he didn’t know what it was about Maria, but by her third nudge, he joined in.

“One of these days we’re going to do this proper, cowboy,” She yelled over the music. “We’re going to do karaoke.”

He snorted and blushed at the mere thought. “I don’t think that’s ever going to happen.”

“Oh Maximilian, you owe me, and I always get my way.”

His headache was starting to settle in, but he wouldn’t dare derail her jam session.

So it made it all the easier to believe that, yeah, she always did.

[toothsy]

Get to know me

My friend : *comes to me randomly* HEY

Me: *jumps* geez you scared me..

My friend : You have a blog on tumblr, right ?

Me : uh... yeah ? I don’t wanna talk about what I write on it plea-

My friend : NONONO that’s not what I want to talk about. Knowing you, you probably didn’t say anything about yourself on your blog :

Me : well-

My friend : SO - I found this *show me the post* - and - hope u do it.

Me : *shrugs* fine

(Just letting you know how I found this -)

A/N : I know I don’t have a lot of followers and probably no one wanna know who I am but I just wanted to do it

And my friends wanted me to do it too, so uh, here it goes

1. What is you middle name? Don’t have one ?

2. How old are you? 14- I’m 15 in December 2 though

3. When is your birthday? December 2

4. What is your zodiac sign? Sagittarius heh

5. What is your favorite color? Hmm, would say blue or green

6. What’s your lucky number? Hmm... would say 13 ?

7. Do you have any pets? Okay hum... 11 dogs - and 3 fish

8. Where are you from? Canada, Quebec to be more specific...

9. How tall are you? Okay please... don’t - laugh at me for this... but I’m 4’9. Which is totally small ugh

10. What shoe size are you? 36-5.5, something like that

11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? 2

12. What was your last dream about? It was pretty weird - but it was just me drinking coffee until my sister came in and said I forgot to put cream in it and then I said ‘’but I like black coffee’’

13. What talents do you have? I draw, I write, I play piano, lil bit of guitar and trumpet , dunno if I should call myself talented though

14. Are you psychic in any way? No ? I don’t know ?

15. Favorite song? Hmm, I wouldn’t say I have a favorite one, but I’m listening to Billie Eilish a lot

16. Favorite movie? Aaargagsgaga, Jurassic Park, since I’m 4 so...

17. Who would be your ideal partner? *shrugs* honestly I don’t even care about the personality of the person (I mean, except if the person is really an asshole) as long as they’re here for me

And laugh at my terrible puns.

18. Do you want children? Hell no, well at least really not right now. Some kids really gets on my nerves honestly ;;’ and one of my worst phobia is too much pain so -

19. Do you want a church wedding? Heh, not really into that stuff, but it could change, depends I guess.

20. Are you religious? Not really

21. Have you ever been to the hospital? Well - of course -

22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? Nah never, I’m a cool person honestly xd

23. Have you ever met any celebrities? No but would love to

24. Baths or showers? I really like both, it depends I guess

25. What color socks are you wearing? Black uwu

26. Have you ever been famous? hahahHA no

27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? Huh, I’m scared of being overwhelmed by people so maybe not xd

28. What type of music do you like? Depends, I like calm and rock music, weird huh

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? No ?

30. How many pillows do you sleep with? 3, I feel like if I don’t hug something while sleeping - I just don’t sleep well, and yes , I also sleep with a plushie ‘cuz of this

31. What position do you usually sleep in? Lateral safety position

32. How big is your house? *shrugs* big enough for 4 people

33. What do you typically have for breakfast? Rice Krispies, believe it or not, I love them. This and milk obviously

34. Have you ever fired a gun? No

35. Have you ever tried archery? Neither

36. Favorite clean word? Geez ? Dunno

37. Favorite swear word? Fuck, I’m saying this a lot and also, in Quebec there’s some swear words that came from religion - which I say them a lot too

38. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep? 1 complete day I guess

39. Do you have any scars? Yep, on my arms

40. Have you ever had a secret admirer? Nop, who would be a secret admirer for a loser like me ? x)

41. Are you a good liar? Nop that’s why I never lie

42. Are you a good judge of character? Not really

43. Can you do any other accents other than your own? English accent and french accent (because french from France And from Quebec have different accents)

44. Do you have a strong accent? Not really

45. What is your favorite accent? British accent didndkdnnd

46. What is your personality type? Mine ? Would say a really nervous but acts like a chill person every time, never sleeps, always do puns and not funny jokes and ... I’m tomboy.

47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing? Oh- would say shoes for running for now

48. Can you curl your tongue? Yep

49. Are you an innie or an outie? Innie

50. Left or right handed? Right handed

51. Are you scared of spiders? Nop !! I love them, I want a tarantula when I’ll be older

52. Favorite food? Sushis and shrimps

53. Favorite foreign food? Hmmm dunno

54. Are you a clean or messy person? Messy

55. Most used phrased? ‘’Aw shit, here we go again’’

56. Most used word? Geez, shit, aw, oh, welp, heh.

57. How long does it take for you to get ready? Not too long, I don’t put makeup or anything, just anything baggy and then we’re outta here

58. Do you have much of an ego? Nop, actually, I don’t have one at all xd

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? ... definitely weird questions for people like me but I suck.

60. Do you talk to yourself? When I’m angry xd

61. Do you sing to yourself? Nop

62. Are you a good singer? Dunno, it’s not too bad but not great either

63. Biggest Fear? Hmm height

64. Are you a gossip? Nah

65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen? Don’t like drama :v

66. Do you like long or short hair? For me I prefer short hair, but I like both for the others

67. Can you name all 50 states of America? No but I can tell you a part of the book 50 shades of- *my friend slaps my head* ow

68. Favorite school subject? English and music

69. Extrovert or Introvert? Introvert

70. Have you ever been scuba diving? Nop and will probably never

71. What makes you nervous? People coming into my room without permissions, people talking shit about me, my dad, but nothing else x)

72. Are you scared of the dark? Nop

73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? I do it just to be funny when I know it’s in a good time to do it, but never for anything else

74. Are you ticklish? Yes, really

75. Have you ever started a rumor? Nop and would never. I had a lot of rumors about me in my old school and it’s definitely not pleasant so I’ll never do that

76. Have you ever been in a position of authority? Nop

77. Have you ever drank underage? Yes - a - lot. Sorry :’v

78. Have you ever done drugs? Nop and would never

79. Who was your first real crush? Huh... real crush ? I had small crushes but never real ones... except Bakugo.. *cough* sorry

80. How many piercings do you have? Only on my ears and never put earrings ah

81. Can you roll your Rs?“ Nah

82. How fast can you type? Pretty fast

83. How fast can you run? Not fast

84. What color is your hair? Blond, naturally blond (hate that color tho.)

85. What color is your eyes? Blue

86. What are you allergic to? Nothing right now

87. Do you keep a journal? Nop

88. What do your parents do? Right now they fight, but huh. Nothing

Oh- jobs, idk

89. Do you like your age? I’ll be in paradise once I’ll be in 15, since I’ll finally start my driving lessons

90. What makes you angry? People not accepting the others and being close minded (my dad most)

91. Do you like your own name? No, I would like an unisex one like Max

92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they? Huuuh, don’t want kids. But it would be Maxine for a girl and Jay/Jeff for a guy

93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child? Doesn’t matter, as long as they’re my kid right ?

94. What are you strengths? Hmm, dunno, would be my endurance ?

95. What are your weaknesses? Social skills lmao

96. How did you get your name? ?? My parents - oh

For my user I just took Tooth put an sy to make it look ‘cute’, I’m sure it’s not tho

97. Were your ancestors royalty? Don’t think so

98. Do you have any scars? Yes... I think it was already asked ? On my arms.

99. Color of your bedspread? Blue

100. Color of your room? White walls

——————-

Anyway, hope you like it uwu

[epic-summaries]

British LegendsxPokémon

Gawain

As one a pearl doth prize, measured ’gainst pease, tho’ white, So do I hold Gawain above all other knight!

Didst thou a little lack, Sir Knight, in loyalty,

’T was not for woman’s love, or aught of villainy,

’T was but for love of life, therefore I blame thee less—”

Sir Gawain and the Green Knight

For the longest time I had Solrock on his team. But I was never 100% comfortable with it because as the Maiden’s Knight I wanted to give Gawain only female Pokémon and Solrock is genderless (I also thought about giving him Braviary but Braviary can only be male). But luckily for me I looked up the Pokémon Species Type (for different reasons) and we have 4 sun/ne Pokémon (which doesn’t include Solrock).

Gringolet, Gawain’s horse has his own Wikipedia article. Not even Owain’s lion has that! Also Gawain’s Scottish, so unicorn. I was debating between Rapidash and Musdale because Gawain does have a story including a donkey. But Musdale is a working horse and Gawain is a knight. Rapidash feels more knightly.

Ponyta was Gawain’s first Pokémon. Gawain had found her in the field grassing. Slowly, the young (let’s say 5) Gawain would go closer to Ponyta every day. He would leave berries for her hoping she would come to him. Ponyta got spooked the few first times but sensing Gawain was kind, she let him come closer. Eventually, she came to Gawain. Once, Gawain tried to pet her, which surprised Ponyta and Gawain got burned. Gawain learned his lesson and the next time, he asked Ponyta’s permission to pet her. She gave him permission.

Neither one of them noticed when Ponyta left the fields and started to sleep in the stables with Gawain, but it didn’t matter. They were each other’s. (I’m going to make Gawain working at the stables for the Pope, ‘cause why not.)

Ponyta and young Gawain worked together and went on adventure together, both loving to explore. With Ponyta, Gawain was able to go places faster and help people. Classic knight errant stuff, but as a preteen.

Ponyta evolved into Rapidash during a joust. Gawain wanted to impress his uncle. Gawain was actually doing very well. He makes it to the end! And he was against a knight on a Rhyhorn. They would have lost if Ponyta didn’t evolve into Rapidash and won them the joust (Yes I am imagining that scene in the anime where Ash riding a Ponyta evolves into a Rapidash.)

The only time Rapidash goes into her pokéball is when Gawain is outside in the rain. But usually she hates her pokéball. Sometimes Gawain more time on her then he does walking.

Her moveset is Stomp, Fire Blitz, Megahorn and Poison Jab.

The Ralts line is partly based on knights. Why Gardevoir and not Gallade? Gallade cannot be female. (Also Gallade works with Guinevere.)

During his explorations, young Gawain and Ponyta found a Ralts in need of help. She was being attacked by a Ferroseed. She was locked into place unable to teleport. Ponyta used ember and the Ferroseed ran away. Gawain brings Ralts “home” aka still the stables in Rome. (Now I’m imagining them using Ralts during mass, it’s adorable in my mind.) Ralts becomes Gawain’s main battler. They sadly lost their first Little Cup tournament. But both of them worked hard and they won their next tournament using confusion!

She evolved into a Kirlia during a tournament, which because she evolved, Gawain was unable to use her. He lost the tournament.

Kirlia wasn’t just used for tournaments but in his adventures Gawain would often use her in battle and to help fight the wild Pokémon.

And in a reference to the Rise of Sir Gawain, Nephew of Arthur, she evolved into Gardevoir during the pirate battle. (I will never not think that’s cool.)

Gardevoir helped Gawain in negotiations when Arthur sent him away to talk with Arthur’s lords or neighbouring kings. Once when the negotiations were going bad, she created a black hole and scared a King in swearing his alliance to Arthur. (She’s still a fairy and they are mischievous.)

Gardevoir’s moveset is Moonblast, Psychic, Thunderbolt and Calm Mind.

When his character is not being butchered, Gawain is often a peace keeper. Leafeon is a piece keeper. Seriously, Platinum Pokédex: It basically does not fight. With cells similar to those of plants, it can perform photosynthesis. Also it gets stronger in the sun, like Gawain. And might be a reference to Sir Gawain and the Green Knight, being green.

In the forest of Italy (because honestly it’s Arthuriana and the forest is magical and Pokémon has tons of Pokémon in the forest), while training Ralts, they found an Eevee sunbathing. Gawain decided to catch her. Eevee was more peaceful and she didn’t battle unless she had to. Though once a Surskit was bullying Ponyta, Ponyta kept trying to stomp on it but it wasn’t working. Eevee tackled the Surskit helping her friend.

In the Magical Forest of Adventure, Eevee had the nighttime munchies and found a mossy rock. Everyone was very surprised the next morning when Leafeon was sleeping with them. They blamed fairies.

Leafeon didn’t change much in personality. She is still very protective of her family and Gawain. Maybe some times a little to protective, getting revenge on people that wronged them.

Her moves are Leaf Blade, Sword Dance, X-Scissor and Synthesis.

Yes, based on both Mexican wrestlers and Aztec Eagle Warriors (seriously) doesn’t match a medieval knight, he is a hawk. And Gwalchmai may (there’s debate) mean Hawk of May.

After getting knighted Sir Gawain from the Pope, Gawain went back home to find his family. He met with Morgause and Lot and Agravaine and Gaheris and Soredamour. There was a family tradition when the child turn 13, they give them an egg of a flying type. Lot gave Gawain a Pokémon an egg, which hatched into a Hawlucha (I know Hawlucha is in the human-like egg group but magic was involved). Gardevoir and Leafeon were mainly her mothers. I’m also imagining Gawain and Hawlucha practicing fighting moves together. Gawain once wrestled Agravain and Gaheris at the same time using moves he learned from Hawlucha.

Hawlucha loved to tournaments. She made a septicle of the whole thing, which made her popular with the crowd as well. Though, sometimes she got into her own head and while showboating she got hit.

Her moveset is Sky Attack, Hi Jump Kick, Flying Press and Stone Edge.

Did you know Espeon is the Sun Pokémon? It also matches Mordred's Umbreon (spoilers).

Gawain was making a name for himself not just in the tournament scene but also in the adventure scene (sure he had a little hiccup with Owain/Morholt/Gawain maiden adventure but generally it was very positive). While on an adventure, Gawain slept with a woman who’s Vaporeon really liked Leafeon. Leafeon gave birth to two Eevees. Gawain kept one but gave the other to his little brother Mordred who was starting his Pokémon adventure. Eevee was easier to raise then Hawlucha for Leafeon. Eevee was always quick learning and loved to sleep with Gawain at night (which she kept doing after evolving). Some nights Gawain found her on his face sleeping (this did not continue after evolution).

Eevee evolved pretty quickly, like I said quick learning. On a bright day, resting from travel, Gawain was playing with Eevee. He threw a stick and the stick stopped in mid air. Having so much fun, Eevee evolved into an Espeon. (Basically the Eevees evolve in nontraditional ways.)

Espeon liked tournaments and showing off her precognition powers (blame it on Hawlucha’s influence).

Her moveset is Psychic, Shadow Ball, Toxic and Future Sight

Did you know that Volcarona is the Sun Pokémon? It’s partly based on sun spots.

Gawain heard about this magical Pokémon in ancient ruins. So, naturally it was adventure time (the theme of this post). He went to the ruins. It’s full of ghost and maybe a legendary? No, it was just a Volcarona. Not what was expected but still welcomed. There was a fight, where Gardevoir hits the final blow. It was as epic as any legendary battle.

After catching Volcarona, the ruins no longer caught fire randomly. So, the neighbouring town was very happy.

Volcarona like the Pokémon Dex entries say, she likes helping people and Pokémon. But, when angered, she is very dangerous.

Her moves are Fiery Dance, Bug Buzz, Quiver Dance and Heat Wave

Previous: Morgana

Next: Merlin

[pokeshippingflashfic]

One word prompt: facepalm

(Sorry for the delay. As I said in my mod note awhile back, I had a rough 24-36 hours, and then got a bad cut on my finger a day or two later that made it hard to type so I had to give it a couple days to heal up.)

If there’s one thing you’ve learned over the past eight or so months of traveling with him, it’s that Ash Ketchum is quite the embarrassment.

You’re halfway to sleeping when the initial thought crosses your mind but it sprints around in ascending circles inside your head before you think to stop it in its tracks.

Whether he’s running off to do something bullheaded or eating himself into a coma while spectators take bets or his pants are falling down in the middle of the street (who cares that it only happened that one time Sabrina’s dad used his psychic power; the point is that it mortified you to witness such a thing), Ash Ketchum is an embarrassment to have around sometimes.

The whole thing stresses you out beyond belief. It’s even led to you eyeballing him out of the corner of your eye nearly constantly just so you can be mentally prepared to handle his next stunt. Sometimes your instincts kick in and you grab a hold of him to try and tell him off, dragging him in the opposite direction. Sometimes you need to scarf down a parfait in the closest cafe you can find in the city your group’s currently traveling through just to relieve the pressure of being in Ash Ketchum’s company. Oh, and sometimes you end up wrapped up and pulled into one of his stupid scenarios too, which is far too exhausting to consider the reasons for!

But now, for the first time since tagging along on that dumb kid’s dumb Pokemon journey, you’re eroded with a random wave of insomnia while sharing a room at the local PokeCenter and all you can do is lay back and think about what a gawd-awful embarrassment that Ash Ketchum is.

All of the above commentary is not to say that he has a tendency to keep you up at night (though the current situation may seem evidentiary to the contrary). And, while a partial statement lifted from your aforementioned thought process could be construed as something akin to caring about him, you’re setting the record straight and clearing that air asap! You don’t care about Ash Ketchum, not really. Sure, you’re civil most of the time, you’ve even felt concerned enough once or twice to personally check in and make sure he’s still alive but… but any decent human being would do the same thing so that shouldn’t count!

No, the truth is you can barely stomach him more than you can stand the presence of bug-type Pokemon. That’s what Ash is to you. A bug. An annoyance.

Though, and your brows furrow together, forehead creasing down and nose scrunching up, it’s not… quite the same. Bug Pokemon are creepy, they even kinda… if you’re gonna go so far as to admit it… scare you. Ash, by comparison, makes you feel neither creeped out nor afraid.

In fact, haven’t there been a couple of times when you’ve… depended on him? Even when it concerned bugs?

You groan aloud to yourself, going immediately stiff in the dark when you hear one of your companions shuffle as they roll over on one of the other beds in the room. You squint in the direction of the silhouette as it shifts and eventually stills, concerned someone would wake and ask questions about what’s preventing your sleep. And there’s no way you’re going to let anyone lord over you the fact that Ash Ketchum is keeping you up at night.

Because he’s not. Because that’s absolutely ridiculous.

… Though, even if someone asks, it wouldn’t be frowned upon to admit that the densest, most frustrating Pokemon trainer in the world is haunting you.

No! You snap onto your side, wrenching the pillow halfway from under your head and covering the ear that is on the other side as if this tactic will somehow drown out your thoughts. No, no! If there’s one way to prevent such a thing from even cropping up in conversation, it’s to change your entire thought process right now before it spirals any further!

If Ash Ketchum makes you think of other things you don’t like then the best way to combat that until you finally get called to dreamland is to think of things you do like, right? Hah! Flawless plan!

So you think about the water, and swimming, and swimming with water-type Pokemon, which are your favorite… That’s nice…  But really, Pokemon in general can be quite nice… and so, quite definitely, are the people who treat Pokemon well…

… People like Ash Ketchum?

I’ve never met anyone like him before…

Your eyes shoot open as the direct quote of your past self flutters through your mind. Some part of you, the part that really had begun to doze off again, can still feel your fingers lace together behind your back, can remember the fullness bursting in your heart as you admire him from afar. But that tender scene took place months ago now.

This isn’t working, you think, rubbing both of your palms against your strained and burning eyelids, falling once more onto your back. What’s the saying? You’re doomed if you do, doomed if you don’t?

What can you do when a particular someone else is invading your consciousness and keeping you from the rest you need? Your ire burns in first, screeching that you should obviously cause that person the same disturbance they’re causing you. It’s what they deserve for insighting such distress!

And yet… and yet there’s another piece of you, logical, more mature, that chimes in next, stating that… perhaps there’s something to be worked out here in the middle of the night involving this other person if they’re capable of keeping you up.

Ash Ketchum is an embarrassment. That’s the root thought that started everything. But Ash Ketchum is admittedly… quite a lot of things. He’s a… decent trainer, you suppose, though he’ll never compare to you. He treats Pokemon like equals, like friends, and it warms your heart to know that people like him indeed exist. You always felt out of place for thinking similarly in Cerulean City. It’s not that people back home were cruel to Pokemon but… was it the same as the level of personal sacrifice Ash tended to lay on the line?

There’s a snort from one of your roommates, presumably the same boy that’s consuming your consciousness, though it irks you some to think a split second later that you know him well enough to recognize the odd sounds he makes while asleep… Where has the time even gone these past eight months?

Ash is - well, he rarely ever allows you the gracious firsthand experience but he’s - a decent person to have around at all. Sure, there are times when he’s annoying, when he’s dumb, dense, stubborn, reckless, immature - oh, wait, you’re working yourself up again… Let’s give it another go…

The point is, despite all of these traits you have bared the brunt of, there are other times when… when he’s more than decent. The times when he stands up against Team Rocket, for instance! Sure, they’re not much of a threat but it’s not like Ash is obligated to fight them… and yet he does almost daily! And there are the people he helps on a regular basis too.

And… well, beyond interpersonal exchanges, Ash is… he reminds you of yourself… which is kinda weird to consider now but once the thought is in your head it refuses to dissipate. He’s young yet passionate enough about training Pokemon that he wants to run headfirst at any challenge coming his way. He cares about nothing but his Pokemon and being the best, his spirit occasionally overwhelming bystanders, including yourself. It’s nice to see that same fire in someone else on a daily basis. It reminds you of how much dedication and work you have to do as well in order to make it to the top.

Was there… a reason for these thoughts circling your mind?

You can’t quite remember, but they put you at ease, comfort you as you lull into a snooze.

The lightning strike of emotional turmoil stamps you from the top of your head to the tips of your toes, both your hands immediately, instinctively clamping over the front of your face as you straighten up against the mattress. You can feel your eyelashes flutter against your finger tips, your hot breath puffing against your palms as you moan quietly to yourself in the dead dark and quiet.

You’d thought that Ash, in all his frustrating egoism and with all his childish quirks, was the embarrassing one… But here you’ve been using him as a coping mechanism to help you fall asleep, internally listing reasons for admiration and likeness and telling yourself it’s a must in order to find any peace tonight…

And honestly, is there anything at all more embarrassing than that?

You spend the next few minutes rolling around, mourning your less emotionally aware state of mind, gone now after half the night’s been spent on dissecting your relationship with this dumb boy…

But after that, you spend the following five or so hours sleeping soundly among your companions without any disruption until it’s time to get the next part of your journey together started.

And you’re remiss to confess even to yourself that thinking good thoughts about Ash Ketchum effectively did its job.

Thus your next round of denial begins.

[rockynfriends]

Rocky’s Stay Chapter 4: Night Watch

This is the final chapter of the narrative regarding Rocketchu’s recovery visit, featuring characters developed by @augmentedampharos. Rocky’s canonical return is soon to follow.

Rocky’s eyes suddenly snap open and he tilts his head towards the door of his room. A thumping sound from the threshold was more than enough to wake him, and in a split-second he’s by the door listening.

“One day…One day…at a time…”

Oddly relaxed by the song, even from an unfamiliar voice, he smiles as he thinks back to earlier that day. Dinner had been lovely, especially in light of sharing with his new friends. He’d been able to contribute his own recipe, which had gone over better than he hoped. His decision to go to bed early was more from a desire to rest than a feeling of apathy – if anything, he had more energy now than he’d felt in a long time. He throws back the covers and steps outside to see a Charmander standing near a table, looking somewhat miffed at his recent collision.

“When did that get there? Hope no one heard—oh. Oops. Sorry, stranger! I just got home and I was trying to avoid waking anyone. Guess I messed it up.”

Rocky smiles. “It’s alright. I was just admiring your singing voice. What’s your name?”

Charmander blushes. “Heh…I had that song in my head and didn’t even know I was singing it! I’m Tas. I live here. Are you Golden’s new friend?”

“It’s nice to meet you, Tas. No, I originally came here because Fugue invited me, though I’d like to see Golden someday. Name’s Rocky!”

As Rocky regards the fire-type, he suddenly realizes that the Charmander is looking rather past him.

“Is there something behind me, or…?”

“Oh, no. The sound in the room just bounces a lot so I was a little off in determining your location.”

“You came remarkably close. I hope I didn’t sound…”

“Oh, no, don’t worry, you didn’t. I was born this way and it’s really not a big deal. Sometimes it even helps when I’m pretending to listen to a grown-up lecture me,” he winks.

Rocky chuckles. “Grown-ups can be tiresome. I think most mean well though.”

“They do, but they don’t know everything. I was playing with Chester, otherwise I’d probably already be in bed.” “I haven’t met him. Is he nice?”

“Yeah, but he likes to stay outside. His ears are like my eyes, so we use telepathy to talk and play.”

“I didn’t know a Charmander could learn that! I’m very impressed.”

“He’s a Kadabra, so he has enough psychic power for us both. You should see us in our dart gun games. We’re unbeatable.”

“I imagine so, what with your synergy.”

“You seem a little different, if you don’t mind my saying.”

“Oh? H-how so?”

“You’re gentle. Most strangers are pleasant, but…kinda noisy. Did something happen?”

“Yeah, a lot did, actually. I’ve been thinking a lot and trying to help get my head right. I think I’m almost there.”

“Well gosh…can I help?”

“You kind of already are--” once again, the Pikachu is surprised by the Charmander’s eyes lighting up.

“Wait, I can’t believe I didn’t connect the dots. You’re Rocketchu!”

“That’s…my official name, yeah. It’s reminiscent of a time in my life long since over. Thus the shorter moniker.”

“It’s an honor. I’m kind of a fan of Team Recover. I mean, you’ve got the guardian of everything, a super-powered cyborg Eeveelution, and a Pikachu who can turn into a superhero!”

“I wouldn’t say the last part quite like that…but how did you know?”

“Well, I listen to broadcasts of Rescue Team events, but I’ve also heard about you from Fugue and Chester…and Budapest. I’ve wanted to meet you for forever! When Fugue told me you were friends I made him promise to introduce me some day.”

Rocky can’t help but blink. “That’s awfully kind of you to say. Now that we’ve met…your thoughts?”

Tas grins. “Definitely as cool as I thought.”

The Charmander can’t see it, but Rocky is touched. At the same time, Rocky notices that he and Tas have exited the house to the yard without ever mentioning going outside.

“Well…that’s honestly more humbling than anything. I mean, it’s very kind of you – but the truth is I’m just another Pikachu trying my best to make the world a little better. I don’t know what I’d do otherwise.”

“And you think that’s ordinary? You are not an ordinary Pokémon.”

“Well, neither are you! I wish I was as quick to encourage others as you are – and as quick to perceive the good in others.”

“Perception requires practice. Kind words…more practice. Oh, but you’re about to ask me a question.”

“I—you’re right! Well, here it is. Earlier…that song you sang. Do you remember where it comes from? What it is?”

“Oh! Well…I only remember the first line.”

“So it does have words. What’s it titled, do you know?”

“I don’t, honestly. But…how about the first line…and maybe that’ll refresh your memory?”

“It’s certainly worth a shot.”

“Okay…here you go.”

So saying, the Charmander takes a breath and begins the melody.

“One day, one day at a time.”

Rocky’s eyes widen as it suddenly comes in, and he hums.

“Bum bum…dun-dun…dadada…one day, one day, at a time.”

“You know it?” Tas says, a bit excited. “Do you know the whole thing? What’s it from?”

“It’s the Song of Life,” Rocky says. “I’d practically forgotten it. It’s the song that flows through every fiber of our world. Written by the reality guardian, and then sent into the heart and soul of every one who could sense it.”

“And now you remember it? Will…will you sing it for me?

Eyes shining, grin wide, Rocky’s nods. “Tas, I would be honored.”

One day, one day at a time! Some days I feel I’ve lost before I even try! On my own, losing grip, trying hard not to cry. Seems like all the others here have got life figured out, But I’m poised on the edge of a breakdown. Life hits me, so how can I fight back? Trying to hold on but the power I lack! I try all I can, but still lose the fight! Wear a smile all day, to fall apart at night! At the end of my rope and I can’t hold on! I fear every moment that I’m getting it wrong! I start calling for help and I hear this song! Don’t worry…don’t worry.

Don’t despair! There’s always trouble out there! Yeah it’s okay for you to still care! Just don’t let it absorb your mind! Don’t give up! There’s so much power in love! You keep your eyes fixed on what’s above! And then you take it, one day, one day at a time!

I want to learn to live in peace a little faster. Enjoy the moment, think less of disaster. Keep my focus on peace, faith, love! The rest will come, those three are enough! Yeah the world is a mess, but it’s not all on you! There’s a lot to be said, for the good you do! And there’s always someone Who loves you too! So don’t worry…don’t worry.

Don’t despair! There’s always trouble out there! Yeah it’s okay for you to still care! Just don’t let it absorb your mind! Don’t give up! There’s so much power in love! You keep your eyes fixed on what’s above! And then you take it, one day, one day at a time!

Tas listens as Rocky’s voice seems to fill the air. Suddenly Rocky whirls around as if in a choreographed routine and begins to chant.

To exhausted ‘mons, and trainers in pain, And the people on whom life’s a constant drain, You gotta take it, you gotta take it, one day at a time.

To the broke down, and let down, and hurt ones like me, To addicted and lost all trying to get free, You gotta take it, you gotta take it, one day at a time.

To the struggling workers, whatever your load, When you’re overwhelmed I promise you’re not alone! You gotta take it, you gotta take it, one day at a time!

From adults to children, let’s never forget! Life’s not always glee, but we’re not home yet! You gotta take it, you gotta take it, one day…one day…one day!

Don’t despair! There’s always trouble out there! Yeah it’s okay for you to still care! Just don’t let it absorb your mind! Don’t give up! There’s so much power in love! You keep your eyes fixed on what’s above! And then you take it, one day, one day at a time!

The song ended, Rocky’s eyes close, and he stands silent for a moment, taking a deep breath.

Tas applauds. “So that’s…Cassiopeia’s song?”

“I doubt they’d call it that…but in a sense, yes. I think it’s everyone’s song, though. The world isn’t fair, and life isn’t easy, and sometimes it flat out stinks, but…there’s still so much out there to be encouraged by, be it events or friends and family. This is an anthem of love to remind us that no one is truly alone where they are. I had forgotten not only the words, but the meaning of the song itself. Thanks to you, Tas, I remember. And now I know what I have to do.”

“Oh? Is that good?”

“Yeah. It’s time for me to go home.”

The two spend the next couple of hours talking about the song…about how they met Fugue, and any number of other things. After a long pause, Tas finally sighs and smiles.

“You know…it’s nice to find out you’re not…I dunno…”

“Untouchable?” Rocky laughs.

“Kind of. I mean, I knew hanging out with you would be great – I just didn’t think it would be like…this.”

“Well, what did you expect? A cape?”

“I guess so!”

Rocky grins. “As much fun as that would be…I’m glad I didn’t seem…like a comic book hero. I’d much rather have friends than fans – and honestly I’m still amazed by the stories you told. You can bet I’ll come back for more…and with more!”

“We’re a couple of special Pokemon,” says Tas, giggling. “I’m only sorry that I met you only in time to see you go…especially with the sun rising now…I guess you’ll want to leave soon?”

“Yeah, but it won’t be too long. You’ve all done so much for me. I wish I could return the favor.”

“That sounds like the beginning of a farewell,” says a familiar voice. “Rocky…you going home?”

The Pikachu and Charmander both turn around, and the former nods with a smile. “My mind…and more importantly, my heart – are back where they need to be, Fugue. My team needs me – and I’m finally ready to be there for them again. You, and Athens, and Budapest, and Tas…you helped me get it together and I can’t thank you enough.”

Fugue smiles, wiping away a few tears. “Rocky…that’s what friends are for. You’re always welcome here whenever you choose to return.”

The Pikachu can’t help himself, and finally tackle hugs his dear friend. “I love you, Fugue.”

“I love you too, Rocky.”

They separate and exchange a smile.

“Alright,” Fugue grins. “Your family can’t wait to see you again.”

“I can hardly wait to see them. Oh, but Fugue…one other thing. I figured out the song.”

Fugue’s smiles curiously. “Really?”

Rocky nods, gesturing for the taller Pokémon to lean over. Fugue does so, and Rocky whispers something in his ear, causing the larger Pokémon to break out into a broad smile.

“Well now…I guess we both needed that reminder.”

“Everyone does, once in a while,” Rocky replies. “Tell everyone ‘thank you’ for me!”

With that, he speeds off, but as they physically separate, the three Pokémon remain united in mind with a particular refrain.

One day, one day at a time…

[fredyates1992]

Reiki Symbol Ganesh Marvelous Tricks

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Reiki Therapy Omaha

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[sesamestreep]

and never ever watch the ten o’clock news

(Read on AO3)

Summary: Bodhi never expected to be sitting in an interrogation room with his best friend while she lied to the police about being a psychic. In retrospect, he probably should have. [AKA the Psych AU Literally No One Asked For]

I wrote this Psych AU for my dearest @taxicabsandcupcakes as an EXTREMELY belated birthday/decently belated Winter Solstice/slightly belated New Year’s/aggressively early Friend-iversary present, which means I’ve had this idea since your birthday but didn’t actually find the inspiration to write it until Psych the Movie happened and then had to invent an occasion for giving it to you. This is my way of saying thanks for your sage writing advice, endless encouragement, and for yelling about Jane Austen on twitter with me. Hope you like it!

There’s additional notes on the fic itself if you follow the AO3 link above, which I recommend reading if you’re the type who enjoys that sort of thing.

“I need you to drive me to the police station.”

Bodhi, to his eternal embarrassment, actually pulls the phone away from his face and stares at it in disbelief, despite the fact that he’s alone in his office and no one is around to appreciate what he assumes is some excellent physical comedy.

“Pardon?” he asks, after a moment.

Jyn sighs on the other end of the phone. “I need you to drive me to the police station. Please,” she adds as an afterthought.

“Doesn’t that honor belong to the cop who’s arresting you?”

“Very funny,” Jyn says flatly. “My bike won’t start, will you please drive me?”

“You’re still not telling me the most important part,” Bodhi says, already starting to feel his exasperation growing. “Why do you need to go to the police station? Did something happen?”

“Something is always happening, Bodhi. Something is happening right now. And right now. And also now--”

“Jyn, come on...”

“Okay, fine. You remember that thing we talked about? The one you said I shouldn’t do anymore?”

“I told you to stop wearing white after Labor Day, advice which you have consistently ignored…”

“I keep telling you, Labor Day is a holiday invented by greeting card corporations to sell product!”

“All those Labor Day cards that everyone buys and sends out to their loved ones,” Bodhi says, playing along with Jyn’s nonsense.

“Exactly!” Jyn practically shouts. “Also, if you think about it, it’s always after Labor Day. You know what I mean?”

“I don’t. Did you get fined for committing a crime of fashion? Is that why you have to go the police station?”

“No, it has to do with the other thing you told me to stop doing.”

“Do I really have to guess? I tell you to stop doing a lot of things,” Bodhi says. His initial worry has already subsided and he’s tired of this conversation. He needs Jyn to tell him what’s going on so he can get back to work.

“Bodhi, don’t be the dollar sign in Ke$ha’s name!” she says, clearly frustrated with him as well.

“She got rid of that, you know. It’s just an ‘s’ now.”

“Precisely.”

“Jyn, honestly…”

“I called in another tip to the police,” Jyn says, suddenly giving up the game. “And before you get upset, that one tip helped them solve, like, ten open armed robbery cases.  So now the chief of police wants me to come down and they’re gonna give me a check, or an award, or something. I can't remember what it was, I wasn't listening. What’s a purple heart for?”

“Injured in battle.”

“Okay, so maybe not that. Whatever. It’s a big deal. The queen will probably be there.”

“Jyn, we live in America. There is no queen here,” Bodhi says, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration.

“Agree to disagree. What do you say? Will you take me?”

“I…” Bodhi begins to say before something occurs to him. “Wait a minute. You told me you were calling in those tips anonymously.”

“I was.”

“So how could they give you a reward, if they don’t even know who you are?” He asks.

“Okay, so,” Jyn begins to say in her best bullshitting voice. It's one that Bodhi is very familiar with. “I might have made a very tiny, laughably insignificant mistake when I called in this particular tip.”

“You told them your name,” Bodhi supplies.

“In my defense, I was a little drunk and I really wanted to impress this girl I was on a date with.”

“Neither of those are good excuses!”

“If it makes you feel better, my date wasn’t pleased either,” Jyn admits. “She was actually kind of insulted that I was paying so much attention to the news when we were making out.”

“As she should be.”

“You know I can’t help it! It’s just the way my brain works!”

“You’re telling me you actually picked up your clue just from the news?” Bodhi asks. “That’s honestly kind of impressive.”

“Tell that to her! She stormed off before I could tell her my whole ‘eidetic memory, trained in observation by my tough cop mother’ tragic backstory,” Jyn says.

“Great. What restaurant are we not going to be able to get a table at from now on?”

“She’s the hostess at Cilantro, that tiny place on Elm.”

“They have the best brunch in the city, Jyn!”

“Yeah. It’s a real loss,” Jyn agrees. “So, you’ll come get me on your lunch?”

***

The first time Bodhi spoke to Jyn was in fourth grade and he and his family had just moved to the country for his dad’s job.  He was a scrawny, brown kid with a funny accent and, to make it worse, he transferred right in the middle of the year. All the kids in his class had already made their friends and they thought he was weird. Everyone except Jyn.

She’d dropped her lunch tray on the table across from him on his first day and said, without preamble, “I like your voice, it sounds like mine. Also, your watch is cool. Have you seen the movie Flubber? It’s my favorite.”

And just like that they were friends. Looking back on it, Bodhi’s not sure he ever really had a choice. Jyn had decided she liked him, and once she liked someone, that was it. They belonged to her.  She was always between him and the meanest kids in school, distracting them, talking in circles until they gave up and left her best friend alone.  You couldn’t mess with Jyn; she had something clever or weird to say to any of your threats or insults and she never cared what other people thought of her.  That, and the fact that her mom was a cop and everyone knew it, meant that people generally left her--and, by extension, Bodhi--alone.

After high school, they went their separate ways: Bodhi went to college to try to make something of himself and Jyn left Santa Barbara on her motorcycle to get away from her mother and see the world.  She sent postcards from every new city she landed in, and the two of them kept in touch even as Bodhi started working as a pharmaceuticals sales rep and Jyn continued to work whatever odd jobs she could find in whatever part of the country she was living in at that moment. In complete defiance of logic and the predictions of their families, the two of them stayed close despite the distance and their wildly different lifestyles. Still, no one was more surprised than Bodhi when Jyn reappeared in Santa Barbara.

He has tried in ways both subtle and obvious to get Jyn to tell him what made her come home, but with no success.  Bodhi assumes it had something to do with her mother retiring and moving to Miami, but he doesn’t think that’s the whole reason.  He’d worry about her, but Jyn seems the same as ever.  She’s got the same mercurial temper--upbeat and joking one minute, put out and snarky the next--and she still flirts with every waitress, bartender, and barista they come across.  Which, of course, means there are several fine establishments in Santa Barbara that Bodhi can no longer visit without someone asking about when his cute friend is going to call them back, or just telling him off in Jyn’s place.

The only thing different about Jyn is her newfound obsession with calling in anonymous tips to the police.  She’s always been highly observant, but Bodhi has never seen her so preoccupied with using her skills to help people.  He told her to be careful about it and he actually thought she would listen, given her distaste for the police, but, instead, he finds himself walking up the steps of the Santa Barbara Police Station with Jyn during his lunch hour to collect her reward.

Once they’re inside, Jyn goes to the desk to let the officer there know that she’s arrived and Bodhi takes a seat on one of the benches in the lobby.  Within seconds, another officer drops off an enormous man in handcuffs, depositing him on the bench next to Bodhi with a muttered, “Wait here!” and then departing.  Now, Bodhi’s come a long way from his terrified, scrawny, fourth grade self, but he is also, in no way, shape, or form, an intimidating person, so he does his best not to make eye contact.

After a few minutes, Jyn joins Bodhi and, as is her custom, puts herself directly between him and danger, this time in the form of their large, handcuffed companion. “What are you in for?” Jyn asks pleasantly. Bodhi elbows her in the ribs.

“They say I jacked my ex-wife’s car, but I’m innocent!” the man shouts.

“Ugh, cops, am I right?” Jyn says, in a tone that sounds more like they’re at happy hour than a police precinct. The man grunts in agreement and the conversation seems to be over, until Jyn adds, more quietly, “Hey, I don’t want to sound like I don’t believe you--because I totally do--but, if I were you, I’d brush that broken glass off your sleeve. To the untrained eye, it looks like maybe you broke a window or something.”

The man glances at Jyn and then at his sleeve, before sweeping his hand over the latter. The same officer from before returns to collect him as soon as he’s finished.

“Thanks,” the man says gruffly as he stands up and then winks at her over his shoulder as he’s lead away.

“No problem,” Jyn says and turns to Bodhi, at whom she rolls her eyes. “Idiot,” she adds, under her breath. “He just knocked all the glass into his boot.”

“You shouldn’t have done that,” Bodhi says, keeping his voice low.

“I know. What’s the point of helping criminals if they’re too incompetent to help themselves?”

“That’s obviously not what I meant,” Bodhi huffs. “Did they tell you how long this was going to take?”

“They said someone would be with me shortly. Please, try to relax.”

“They can’t just give you a check? It has to be a whole production?”

“Bodhi, don’t be the Brave Little Toaster’s less brave little cousin!”

“I just have a bad feeling about this,” Bodhi says, ignoring her.

“Noted. Now, be quiet and I might let you be in the picture with me, the mayor, and what I hope is one of those giant novelty checks,” Jyn says.

“I do love giant novelty checks,” Bodhi admits.

“You know that’s right,” Jyn says, and offers her fist for him to bump.

At that moment, another cop appears in front of them. “Jyn Erso?” he asks, sounding uninterested in a response.

Jyn stands up to greet him. “That’s me. And this is my associate, DJ Deathstar,” she says, motioning at Bodhi, who just rolls his eyes at her. Jyn’s been making up fake names for him since they were kids and it’s probably better the police don’t know his actual name anyway.

The officer looks perplexed but all he does is nod and say, “If both of you would follow me,” before leading them out of the lobby and through the bullpen.

They go through a door at the far side of the room, which leads them to a long cinderblock hallway with several doors on either side.  The officer opens the last one on the right, and motions for them to go in ahead of him.  Once Bodhi and Jyn have both crossed the threshold, he closes the door behind them suddenly and they both turn in surprise.

All at once, Bodhi realizes where they are.

“Shit,” he says, taking in the bleak room with the large table in the middle and the mirror on the wall. “Why are we in an interrogation room?” he asks Jyn.

Jyn, for her part, is glaring at the other figures in the room.  Seated at the table are two more cops, but they’re in plain clothes, which must mean they’re detectives. They stand as soon as Bodhi speaks.

“Why don’t you both take a seat?” the shorter of the two of them says.  He’s soft spoken with a slight accent and he looks absolutely exhausted.

Bodhi nearly jumps out of his skin when he feels Jyn’s hand on his elbow.  When he looks over, she gives him a reassuring smile. If he didn't know her as well as he does, he could totally miss the anger behind that smile, but they've been friends for twenty years and he’s perfected the art of reading Jyn’s moods. These detectives have no idea what they've gotten themselves into. She cocks her head towards the chairs in invitation and he gets the message loud and clear without her saying anything. Do what they tell you and let me do the talking.

“They didn’t mention anything on the phone about a vetting process before they gave me the key to the city,” Jyn says, nice and light, once she and Bodhi have sat down on the other side of the table.

“You are not getting a key to the city, Miss Erso,” the other cop says, his tone clipped.  He has an expressionless face and is frankly too tall to be an actual human being, as far as Bodhi is concerned.

“No…?” Jyn asks innocently.

“No,” he says, sounding even less amused than before.

“Listen, Mr. ...?”

“Detective,” he corrects. “Head Detective Kay Tuesso.”

“Your mother must be very proud,” Jyn says, and Bodhi has to hold back a snort. “And who’s this?” she asks, her eyes training on the other detective.

“My partner, Detective Andor,” Detective Tuesso says, obviously growing impatient with Jyn’s antics.

“Charmed,” Jyn says and actually extends her hand for Detective Andor to shake. He gives her a puzzled look in return.

Nonplussed by any of the annoyance she seems to be causing, Jyn pulls her hand back and leans forward conspiratorially on the table.  “Now that we’re all on such friendly terms, why don’t you tell me what exactly is going on?” she asks.

“I’m sorry, Miss Erso,” Detective Andor says, “but we’re not all acquainted. Who is this?” he asks, gesturing at Bodhi.

Jyn turns and gives Bodhi a searching look.  For his part, Bodhi would rather not tell the police his name, given he has no idea what sort of trouble Jyn has unintentionally mixed herself up in, but he’s pretty sure they can figure it out who he is whether she tells them or not. He knows better than to actually shrug at her, when everything about her demeanor is screaming be careful at him, so he just looks back at her as calmly as he can. They’ve been in enough crazy situations together over the years that he trusts her to get them out of this one.  He sees her small smile of comprehension before she turns back to the detectives.

“This is Bodhi,” she says evenly. “He drove me here.”

“What, like a Lyft driver?” Detective Andor asks.

“Yes!” Jyn replies, snapping her fingers like they're all just brainstorming together and she loves what the detectives are bringing to the table. Which, knowing Jyn, might be what she actually thinks.

“And you brought him in with you because…?”

“I'm just quirky, I guess,” Jyn says with an easy shrug and barrels on before the detectives can question her any further on Bodhi’s presence. “Now that we’re finally all acquainted, can you get to the point? The meter’s running.”

Neither of the detectives look particularly convinced by any of this, but Detective Andor continues anyway. “You recently called in a tip about several armed robberies that occurred in the last few weeks. Is that correct?”

“Yes.”

“Well, thanks to that information you gave us, we’ve apprehended a suspect.”

“Good for you,” Jyn says, with forced cheer. Bodhi can practically see her patience wearing thin before his eyes.

“I'm glad you feel that way,” Detective Andor replies, tightly, and Bodhi thinks that Jyn probably isn't the only one who's running out of patience. “But, you see, we have a problem.  Our suspect claims he had a partner, somebody who masterminded the whole thing, and he’ll only tell us their name if we give him immunity.”

“Huh. That’s a real pickle,” Jyn says, flatly, as if the subject doesn't interest her at all.

“As you can imagine, we don't want to give in to our suspect’s demands, not when we can just arrest both of the people responsible,” Detective Andor continues, adopting a tone one would normally use when explaining a difficult subject to a child. “So, we’re trying to figure out who this accomplice is on our own. And that's why we’ve brought you here today.”

There's a full minute where Jyn just blinks at the detectives in confusion and Bodhi starts to worry that she's actually stopped functioning. He's about to grab her by the shoulder and shake her out of it when she blurts out, “I'm sorry, just so we’re clear, you want me to figure out the guy’s accomplice too?”  When they say nothing in response, Jyn continues, disbelieving, “I'm just curious, when do you two start chipping in?”

The detectives exchange a look at that, and Bodhi suddenly understands what is going on.

“Jyn,” he says as a warning.

“What?” Jyn snaps, turning on him.

Bodhi heaves a deep sigh before speaking. “They think you did it,” he says.

“I--” Jyn begins to say before turning to look at the detectives.  She must see the same thing in their faces that Bodhi did, because she suddenly freezes. “You think I'm the accomplice?” she asks, incredulity and anger making her voice go quiet.

The scariest thing about Jyn, in Bodhi’s opinion, is how calm she gets when she's really and truly angry.  The detectives in front of them might be well trained in reading people and analyzing evidence, but he's pretty sure they are in no way prepared for Jyn when she's actually furious.

“The evidence you gave to our tip line could only have come from someone with inside knowledge of the crimes,” Detective Tuesso says.

“That is not true.”

“What other explanation is there?” Detective Andor asks, sounding at least open to the possibility.

“Maybe I'm just a better detective than you are,” Jyn says, leaning back and crossing her arms over her chest, her tone casual but filled with malice. Bodhi does his best not to wince.

“Or, perhaps,” Detective Tuesso begins, “you realized your good luck was running out, that you and your partner would not be able to evade the police forever, and you decided it was time to cut your losses and turn him in.”

“And gave my name to an anonymous tip line while I was at it, just in the interest of fairness,” Jyn says, mockingly.  “Oh, and I also trusted that my partner--who I had just betrayed--wouldn't rat me out to the police!  You're right, I'm a criminal mastermind!”

“Jyn,” Bodhi says again, hoping she’ll actually heed the warning in his voice this time.

“You aren't offering us any other plausible explanations for your having such detailed information, Miss Erso,” Detective Andor says. “And if you can't do that, we’ll have to arrest you.”

It might just be that the precarious nature of their situation puts Bodhi in a dramatic mood, but he swears, in that moment in the interrogation room, that time actually stops, allowing him to see the exact second that Jyn comes up with a plan. There’s no mistaking the expression that comes over her face for anything other than pure, mischievous inspiration.

“Alright, alright, you got me!” Jyn says, and Bodhi thinks he might actually be having a heart attack. “I haven't been honest with you. But it's only because I--” Jyn breaks off and looks downward, the picture of innocence. “I didn't think you'd believe the truth.”

“And what exactly would that be?” Detective Tuesso asks, not looking convinced in the slightest.

“I'm psychic,” Jyn says and, yep, Bodhi is definitely having a heart attack. “I have the Gift. The Sight, if you will. That’s how I knew about those robberies. I saw them, with my third eye.”

The entire room seems to be holding its breath after Jyn’s “confession”.  No one seems to know what to do with themselves and Bodhi doesn't dare to even look at Jyn. He’s pretty sure if he so much as exhales, all hell will actually break loose.

The two detectives, recovering from their shock, both move at the exact same time.  Detective Tuesso stands abruptly and says, “If you're done wasting our time--”, while Detective Andor reaches across the table for the case file and says, “You mean to tell us--” before they're both interrupted.

Jyn, in a split second, leans forward and captures Detective Andor’s wrist in her hand.  She closes her eyes, as if trying to remember some long lost memory, and takes a deep breath. When she's finished, she looks Detective Andor directly in the eye and says, “You have to stop blaming yourself.  It wasn't your fault.”

“Excuse me?” He says, utterly bewildered.

“I hear screaming. Sirens,” Jyn says, waving her hands around her head in a way that Bodhi imagines is supposed to convey spirituality. “I smell...gunpowder? There was a shooting. You did...everything you could. Everything by the book.” Jyn pauses, then adds, “As always.”

Detective Andor looks petrified by this outburst. “How did you--” he begins to ask, his voice even quieter than usual.

“As I've told you, I have...abilities. Of the supernatural variety,” Jyn says. She seems to realize she's still holding his wrist and looks at it intently. “This is your first case back on active duty, am I correct?”

“Don't answer that,” Detective Tuesso cuts in.

Detective Andor looks at his partner like he had completely forgotten there was anyone else in the room, then looks back at Jyn.  He pulls his arm away from her like he's been scalded.  Jyn, for her part, looks back at him serenely.

“This is highly entertaining, Miss Erso,” Detective Tuesso begins to say, “but this proves absolutely nothing.  And moreover--”

“Ah, fuck!” Jyn yells, squeezing her eyes shut and rubbing her temples, as though she's got the world’s worst brain freeze. “That feels like…glass.  Broken glass. I can see it shattering. And there's a tall man there. He's very angry, and heartbroken. A lover’s spat, perhaps?”

“What are you--”

“Yes, definitely, an argument between lovers.  I see...a heart…and an arrow...and the letter S.  Does this mean anything to you?”

When the detectives say nothing in response, Jyn winces again. “Yes, of course. I see it clearly now. You have a man in custody here, about this tall,” Jyn says, gesturing well above both her and Bodhi’s heads. “The answers you seek are in his left boot.”

Both of the detectives are staring at her, completely mystified, and Detective Tuesso looks like he's about to make another attempt at bringing Jyn to order when there's three taps in quick succession on the one-way mirror.

“Excuse us a moment,” Detective Tuesso says, looking none too pleased with the interruption. “Come on,” he  says to his partner, who seems to be having more trouble tearing himself away.

They both depart, leaving Jyn and Bodhi alone in the interrogation room.  This would be a wonderful moment to confront Jyn about what the hell she thinks she's doing but unfortunately, they're not actually alone.

“I can hear you thinking from here,” Jyn says quietly.

“We’re not talking about this now. We can't,” Bodhi whispers urgently.

“I need you to relax,” Jyn responds. “Everything is fine, as far as you and I are concerned. Just, trust me. When have I ever lead you wrong?”

“Would you like that list in chronological order?”

Jyn makes a tsk sound in the back of her throat. “You can suck it,” she says petulantly.

“You suck it,” Bodhi fires back.

“No, you.”

“You.”

He and Jyn actually look at each other after that. “Suck it,” they both sing-song in harmony, like they're still teenagers and not the full-grown adults they're supposed to be acting like. Maybe there are worse people to be stuck in an interrogation room with, Bodhi thinks, at the exact moment Detectives Tuesso and Andor return.

“You're free to go,” Detective Tuesso says, looking pained.

Jyn rises immediately, grabbing Bodhi’s elbow to drag him up with her as she goes and giving him a kick in the ankle to get him moving towards the door.

“Not you,” Detective Tuesso says, pointing at Jyn.

“What?” Jyn cries. “But you just said--”

“We’re not arresting you,” Detective Andor says. “But Interim Chief Mothma would like to speak with you.  Alone,” he adds, when he sees Jyn and Bodhi exchange a look.

Bodhi is about to object when he feels Jyn give his elbow a reassuring squeeze. He turns to look at her and she's smiling like she always does when faced with a challenge. Go ahead, that smile is meant to say, I've got this.

“I think they're finally going to give me my giant novelty check,” she says before she breezes past him out the door.

***

Twenty minutes later, Jyn finds Bodhi pacing on the steps outside the precinct.  The look on his face must be more anguished than he realized because when he turns and sees her, she immediately throws both of her hands up in a don’t shoot gesture.

“Alright, before you yell at me—”

“What in the absolute fuck did you just do?!” he shouts.

“I said before you yell at me, dude! Come on!” Jyn practically whines.  “And what I just did was save our asses, so you’re welcome.”

“You wouldn’t have had to save my ass in the first place if you had just driven yourself to the precinct and left me out of it.”

Jyn opens her mouth to argue with him, but Bodhi continues before she can get a word in.  “And, furthermore, you just lied. To the police. About being a psychic. I mean, have you lost your damn mind?!”

“Hey, say it a little louder, why don’t you?” Jyn shouts back, and Bodhi sobers. “Feel better now?” She asks, when she’s given him a moment to collect himself. When he nods, she says, “I can’t believe you just furthermore’d me, man. You’re starting to sound like your mother.”

“Shut up,” Bodhi says, without heat. Jyn cracks a smile, which he finds himself returning tentatively. “What did the chief want to talk to you about?”

“Interim chief,” Jyn corrects, and Bodhi rolls his eyes at her. “She’s pregnant.”

“She wanted to tell you she’s pregnant?”

“No. I’m just telling you.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s badass,” Jyn says, gesticulating wildly. “A pregnant cop? How cool is that?”

“Jyn…”

“Sorry for trying to paint you a picture with my words, Bodhi! I thought maybe you felt left out!”

“I was deeply hurt,” Bodhi says, gravely. “Now, will you please tell me why you got called into a meeting with the chief of police?!”

“Interim chief! And she wants my help with a case,” Jyn says casually. She even has the audacity to shrug.

Bodhi’s pretty sure he’s actually gaping at her now. Like, his jaw is actually hanging open in shock. He’d be embarrassed, but he just doesn’t have the capacity for any other emotions at the moment.

“Why?” He finally manages to ask, after an embarrassingly long pause.

“Haven’t you heard?” Jyn says with a mischievous smile. “I’m Santa Barbara’s most preeminent psychic detective!”

Bodhi groans and puts his head on Jyn’s shoulder. She pats at him in a halfhearted consoling gesture.

“Can you be the ‘most preeminent’ something? Does that work grammatically?” She asks, nonchalantly.

“Don’t you dare try to distract me with grammar, Jyn,” Bodhi warns. “This is the craziest thing I’ve ever heard.”

“I know for a fact you listened to all of R. Kelly’s ‘Trapped in a Closet’, so there’s no way that’s true.”

“It was before he got weird!”

“No, it wasn’t.”

“I don’t even know how you did that back there,” Bodhi cries, getting them back to the subject at hand.

“What?”

“All that stuff you said in the interrogation room! How did you do it?”

“You know about my observation thing,” Jyn says, brow furrowing in confusion.

“Yeah, but that stuff with the detective. How did you know all that?”

Jyn sighs, as if explaining her skills is a huge burden. “I saw in the paper a few weeks ago that there’d been a shooting and the police had been involved.”

“They wouldn’t have published the officer’s name,” Bodhi interjects.

“No,” Jyn concedes. “But the officer at the front desk was asking about how the new guy was doing, being back from administrative leave. The cop he was talking to was the one who brought us into the interrogation room, so clearly he had been working with our detectives on the robbery case.  And most of the cops in the SBPD are still left over from my mom’s time there—at least the ones that are old enough to make detective—and I didn’t recognize Detective Andor, so I figured it could have been him. Standard administrative leave is two weeks, the shooting happened roughly that long ago, and I noticed the bags under his eyes, like he hadn’t been sleeping well. So, I took a stab in the dark. So to speak.”

“Jyn, all of that is totally circumstantial. What if you’d been wrong?” Bodhi says, even though he’s a little in awe of what he’s just heard.

“Luckily, I wasn’t,” Jyn says simply.

“What about all that stuff with the heart and the shapes and the letter?” Bodhi asks.

“Oh,” Jyn says, as if she’s already forgotten. “Our carjacker from the lobby had a tattoo on his ankle. One of those hearts that’s been shot through with an arrow. And it had the name ‘Susan’ wrapped around it, on a banner. Figured if Susan was his wife, she probably filed the charges against him and the letter would jog their memory if nothing else did.”

“This is unbelievable,” Bodhi says, shaking his head. “And what does the Chief want from you?”

“Interim chief. And she wants me to help them with a kidnapping case.”

“I’m a little nervous about the strength of our police force if they have to hire you to solve a kidnapping.”

“I know, right?” Jyn says. “Apparently, it’s the heir to some hoity-toity family’s fortune that’s gone missing. The family is close with the governor and Interim Chief Mothma is under a lot of pressure to solve this thing quickly.”

“They think this guy is still alive?”

“I guess so.”

“Huh,” Bodhi says. “Are they paying you?”

“In a manner of speaking.”

“So, that’s a no.”

“It’s more that they’re paying me by not arresting me,” Jyn says. “And only if I deliver.”

“And what happens if you don’t?” Bodhi asks, not totally convinced he wants to know the answer.

“They’ll arrest me for obstruction of justice,” Jyn says simply.

“Damn it, Jyn.”

“I don’t know why you’re so worried. This is like my two greatest strengths: observation and bullshitting. My whole life has been preparation for this!”

“Only you would see having to prove to the police that you’re psychic by solving a high profile missing persons case as a fun challenge.  Do I need to remind you you’re not actually psychic, or are you at least still mildly self-aware?” Bodhi asks.

“Bodhi, don’t be an under-whipped meringue! I know what I’m doing!” Jyn says, and he has to admit, he can’t remember the last time she was this excited about anything. “Now, do you want to go interrogate some fancy white people with me, or not? I bet they own some Baroque art or whatever that you can nerd out about while I investigate.”

“Jyn, I can’t,” Bodhi says, and he thinks he sees Jyn’s face fall, just for a second, before she quickly hides her reaction. “I have to get back to office, I have a million calls to return. I can’t get involved with one of your crazy schemes today, I’ve lost enough time already.”

As soon as it’s out of his mouth, he knows it was the wrong thing to say. He and Jyn don’t fight, not really, and any spats they do have are over as quickly as they begin, usually because they start punching each other and get it out of their systems. What does happen occasionally, though, is that Jyn will shut him out—when she feels rejected in any way, or when she’s going through her own stuff that she doesn’t want to talk about. Bodhi sees the neutral mask that immediately goes over her features and he knows she’s upset by what he’s just said.

“Jyn—” he starts to say, reaching for her.

“Don’t worry about it,” Jyn interrupts, already looking around for her exit, instead of looking at him. “I’m gonna get a cab. I’ll talk to you later.”

As she passes by, she claps Bodhi on the shoulder and then she’s gone.

***

Just like they don’t fight, he and Jyn also don’t apologize. It took some getting used to in the beginning for Bodhi, a naturally nervous person for whom apologizing—even when nothing is his fault—is just a reflex.  Jyn, on the other hand, never apologizes for anything. If the phrase “I’m sorry” comes out of her mouth, it’s always a transitional phrase at best, and sarcastic at worst. Over the years, Bodhi has warmed to Jyn’s way of dealing with things. On the rare occasions they do actually fight, Jyn will disappear for a few days and then resume contact as if nothing ever happened. She just needs time and space to get over herself sometimes.  And once she has, she doesn’t hold a grudge, at least not when it comes to him. Old issues don’t come back up in arguments years later with her, the way they do in Bodhi’s other relationships. It’s a fault he’ll readily admit he has as well, never letting old grievances go, so it’s probably just as well Jyn isn’t like that with him. Maybe, every once in a while, they actually do bring out the best in each other.

All of this is to say, when Bodhi doesn’t hear from Jyn for three days after their conversation outside of the police station, he’s not actually worried. It’s pretty standard behavior from her, and, even without their weird conflict, they don’t always talk everyday anyway. There’s the niggling concern in the back of his mind that she’s working on a case, and she could actually be in danger and that’s why he hasn’t heard from her, but it’s not enough to really drive him to distraction.

Still, his relief when he gets a call from her on that third day is immediate and a little overwhelming. It’s short-lived, however, when he hears how tired she sounds on the phone and when she asks, tentatively, if he’ll come pick her up because her bike broke down on some isolated back road. His keys are in his hand before he even hangs up and the next thing he knows he’s calling over his shoulder to the woman at the front desk that he’ll be out all afternoon with a family emergency.

It’s nearly forty minutes later that Bodhi actually finds her, because, while Jyn did her best to explain where she was, she is stranded on a truly deserted back road and there’s no landmarks nearby for reference. When he arrives, Jyn is still trying to get her bike to start, with no success. Her jeans are covered in mud, her hands are coated with black grease from working on the motorcycle, and Bodhi is pretty sure she hasn’t brushed her hair since he saw her last. She looks a complete mess, and worry bubbles up in Bodhi’s throat just seeing her.

He pulls over, throws the car in park, and gets out in something of a daze, but he can’t actually bring himself to say a word. Anything he says will betray his concern, and there’s nothing that raises Jyn’s hackles more than being fretted over. When she makes eye contact with him, he says, “You look great,” because he can’t come up with anything else and Jyn’s face breaks into a relieved smile.

“Yeah, well, you know what they say,” she responds, gesturing at herself with one hand. “Dress for the job you want.”

“You want to be Farmer Hoggett?”

“Danny Zuko, actually,” Jyn says, waving her motor oil-stained hands at him. She follows up the gesture with a heavy sigh, and all the energy seems to drain out of her at once.

“You’ve only been a fake psychic detective for three days, Jyn,” Bodhi jokes. “You can’t be tired of it already.”

“Watch me,” she says through a yawn. “And I may be a fake psychic, but I’m a real detective, thank you very much.”

“You have the bags under your eyes to prove it,” Bodhi says, the only way he can think of to bring up her disheveled state.

“Thanks, they’re vintage.”

“I thought so,” Bodhi replies, and then he decides they’ve goofed around enough, given the situation. “Seriously, Jyn, what happened? Are you hurt?”

“I’m fine,” she says, reflexively. “I hurt my knee when the bike crapped out, but that’s that worst of it. I just need a ride home, so I can change my clothes and keep working on the case.”

Bodhi wants to ask more questions, but he knows Jyn is probably frustrated enough as it is and she’ll probably be more inclined to talk once they’re on their way.

“Okay,” he says, inclining his head towards his car. When Jyn starts to move towards him, he asks, “What are you going to do about your bike?”

“I got a guy coming to pick it up. He’ll bring it home for me,” Jyn says, as Bodhi holds open the passenger side door for her.

“You should bring it to a mechanic.”

“You should suck it,” Jyn counters. “I can fix my own bike.”

“Clearly,” Bodhi says, gesturing at the dejected looking motorcycle behind them. Jyn scowls at him from her seat as he closes the car door.

Once he’s back in the driver’s seat and they’re on their way back to Santa Barbara, Bodhi looks over at Jyn. Up close, she looks even more exhausted than he initially thought.

“When was the last time you slept?” He wonders aloud.

Jyn gives the appearance of thinking it over before saying, “When did we last see each other?”

“Three days ago.”

“Sometime before that, then.”

“Good grief,” Bodhi mutters. “How are you even alive right now?”

“I’m not. I’m a ghost. I’ve been a ghost this whole time,” Jyn says, drily.

“How dare I care about your well being,” he says, shaking his head bitterly.

For once, the guilt trip actually seems to have an effect on Jyn, because she sobers a little and says, “You’d be amazed what a great motivator the threat of jail time can be.”

“I honestly forgot all about that,” Bodhi says, keeping his eyes on the road.

“Really? You?”

“I guess I just had no doubt you’d solve the damn thing,” he replies, with a shrug. “You’re Jyn. You’ve never met a crazy situation you couldn’t get yourself out of.”

When he chances another look in her direction, she’s looking back at him with a serious expression. “Your faith in me is undeserved,” she says. “But appreciated.”

“Anything for you,” Bodhi says, and he means it. They’re always going to be there for each other; it’s what best friends are for.

They drive in companionable silence for a few minutes, and Bodhi wonders how he’s going to get her to tell him about the case. He doesn’t have long to worry about it, though, because the next thing he knows, he sees flashing lights in his rear view mirror and hears a siren blaring.

“Jyn,” Bodhi says warningly as he pulls over. “What did you do?”

When he looks over at her, however, she looks just as confused as Bodhi feels. This must be a surprise to her as well.

Still, Bodhi can’t help but add, “You better tell me now, so we can get our stories straight.”

“I have no idea what’s going on,” Jyn says, shrugging. She reaches over and gives his arm a squeeze, then adds, “But I’m glad to have you on my side.”

The cop who’s just pulled them over taps on the window, and Bodhi does his best not to jump. He rolls down the window.

“Good afternoon, officer. What can I do for you?” Bodhi asks, trying to sound casual and definitely failing.

“License and registration,” the cop says, and Bodhi hurries to oblige. He hands over the items, but the cop is looking at Jyn very intently.

“You look familiar,” he says to her.

“I was the model for the Morton’s Salt Girl,” Jyn says immediately, and Bodhi has to suppress the urge to smack her.

The officer looks up from Bodhi’s license when she speaks. “Hey, that’s it. You’re Lyra’s kid, aren’t you?” He asks, finally cracking a smile.

“Guilty as charged,” Jyn says with a rueful smile, and Bodhi has to resist the urge to smack her again. He settles for glaring at her instead.

“I worked with your mom for a long time, right up until she retired,” the officer says, his whole demeanor changed to one of friendliness. “How’s she doing?”

“Oh, you know. She’s in Miami. Livin la vida loca, and all that,” Jyn says, casually, as if she’s spoken to her mother mother recently, which Bodhi knows for a fact she hasn’t.

The officer, for his part, looks confused. “Is that so?” He asks. “Because I saw her at the Safeway just last month.”

“She was just visiting,” Jyn lies, automatically.

“She told me she was moving back to the old house,” the cop says.

“Well, you’re just remarkably well informed, aren’t you?” Jyn says, feigning sweetness.

“Uh, is there a problem here, officer?” Bodhi asks, trying to distract the cop from asking Jyn any more questions.

“One of your tail lights is out,” the officer says, turning his attention back to Bodhi reluctantly. “You need to get that fixed,” he adds, handing Bodhi back his license and registration.

“Absolutely, sir. I will. Right away,” Bodhi says eagerly.

The officer nods. “Alright, then. You two have a good rest of your day, now. And tell your mom Officer Macklin says hello,” he adds to Jyn.

“You got it,” Jyn says, already turning away from him.

The cop heads back to his own car and Bodhi pulls away carefully. It isn’t until the cop car is a tiny, retreating speck in the rear view mirror that Bodhi chances speaking to Jyn.

“Your mom is back in Santa Barbara?” He asks carefully.

“Apparently,” Jyn says with an unconvincing shrug. She’s looking down at her phone instead of meeting his eye.

“You want me to bring you to her house instead?” Bodhi asks, looking back and forth between her and the road.

“No need. Liverpool has a match today,” Jyn says, looking up from her phone. “And there’s only one bar in town that will put football on the TV. Take your next right.”

***

If anyone were to ask him, Bodhi would say he loves Jyn’s parents like they’re his own, but he’s also pretty glad that they’re not. Growing up, he spent a lot of time at Jyn’s house and he got to know Galen and Lyra Erso fairly well. He’d always been closer to Jyn’s dad, who was always interested in Bodhi’s school projects and honors classes. They had a lot of similar interests, which couldn’t be said of Bodhi and his father. Bodhi loves his dad, and he knows his dad loves him, but they don’t always have a lot to talk about. So it was nice to talk to Galen, every now and then, and imagine what it would be like.

Jyn, for her part, was always closer with her dad too, but, because his job had him traveling a lot, she spent a lot more time with her mother, whose odd hours as a cop meant she could be around for her kid more often than her husband could. Lyra is hard to describe; she’s not a particularly warm person, but she is undeniably generous and invested in others. That’s always been Bodhi’s experience, at least. For the longest time, he assumed Jyn’s mother hated him, as she never seemed happy to see him. It took time for him to realize that she showed affection more practically than that. She has never forgotten a single thing Bodhi has ever told her, he’s pretty sure, which is how she remembers things like his mom’s birthday and her favorite kind of flowers to send every year, and how, all through his high school years, she knew his top choice colleges—in order—by heart after he mentioned them to her once.  Much like he came around to Jyn’s unique personality, Bodhi eventually realized that Lyra’s intense questions and no-nonsense attitude were the product of her caring very deeply, rather than not caring at all. It was easier for him, though. She wasn’t his actual mother and if she ever got to be too much for him, he could just go home. Jyn didn’t have that option.

For as long as he can remember, Jyn and her mother have been like oil and water; they just do not mix. It would be easy to blame the animosity on Jyn’s parents’ divorce when she and Bodhi were in high school, but the conflicts between Jyn and Lyra were going on long before that. Jyn has always resented her mother for raising her basically from birth to become a cop, without taking her daughter’s personality or interests into account. When her parents separated, things only got worse, especially when her parents agreed, without consulting her, that she would live full time with her mother. From there, Jyn’s rebellious streak only got worse and as soon as she turned eighteen, she was out of her mother’s house.

About a year ago, Lyra retired early from the police force and moved all the way to Miami. Bodhi

never expected Jyn to come back to Santa Barbara permanently, but if there was one thing that didn’t surprise him about her return, it was that she waited until her mother was gone to do so.  

But Lyra was back now too. The proof was right in front of them as they entered the pub. Jyn’s mother was sitting alone at a table near the bar with a full beer in front of her, her eyes on the television that was set to the football match.

Jyn makes an annoyed noise in the back of her throat, which brings Bodhi’s attention back to her. “What is it? What’s the matter?”

“Nothing, it’s just—” Jyn pauses to roll her eyes. “She’s such a cop, that’s all. I mean, she can see every possible exit from her seat. Does she ever take a day off?”

“She’s retired,” Bodhi points out.

“You can’t retire from being a pain in the ass.”

“That’s lovely, Jyn,” Bodhi says. “You ought to cross-stitch that on a pillow.”

“And you ought to suck it,” Jyn shoots back, pleasantly.

“No, I insist. You suck it,” he replies, and throws his arm out in an after you gesture.

Jyn shakes her head at him. “Here we go,” she says, like she’s approaching an executioner, and not her mother.

As they cross from the door to where Jyn’s mother is sitting, something occurs to Bodhi. “Wait, what do I call her?” He asks suddenly.

“What are you talking about?” Jyn asks under her breath.

“I normally call her Mrs. Erso, but your parents are divorced now, yeah?”

“Funny story,” Jyn says, though the grim look on her face says otherwise. “They’re actually not.”

“Wait, what? It’s been, like, 10 years!”

“Believe me, I know.”

“So, what are they, if not divorced?”

“Hella estranged,” Jyn says with a shrug.

“Is that the legal term?” Bodhi asks, unamused.

“Yes.”

“Seriously, what do I call her, Jyn?”

“I don’t know, dude. Call her Deputy Dog, for all I care,” Jyn whisper-shouts at him. By then, they’ve reached her mother’s table, and Jyn says, “Hey, Mom!” as if she’s surprised to see her there. In her mother’s favorite pub. Where they specifically came looking for her.

“Jyn,” her mom says with a nod. Bodhi’s fairly certain she saw them come in. Hell, she might have spotted them before they got to the door. She’s that good. “Hello, Bodhi. How are you?” she says, turning her attention to him and offering her hand to shake.

“Hello, Mrs. Erso,” he responds. She has the strongest handshake of anyone he knows. It’s like she took a seminar or something. “It’s good to see you again.”

“Are you still working in pharmaceuticals?” she asks, taking a sip of her beer.

“Yes.”

“Good for you. It’s nice to see some young people are able to hold down a job for more than six months.”

Jyn rolls her eyes at the obvious dig in her direction. Bodhi coughs to mask his discomfort and mumbles a response.

“Bodhi would ask about how Miami is treating you, but, unfortunately, you’re not in Miami. You’re here,” Jyn says, her voice pitchy with annoyance.

“I didn’t care for Miami,” Lyra says simply. “Too humid. Too many nightclubs. I got bored.”

“And you didn’t think to tell me you were coming back because…?”

“You would have to call me on occasion to know anything about my life, dear,” Lyra says. “Or return my calls. But you don’t. Besides, if I had told you, I’m sure you would have scurried off to some new town to get away from me as soon as you found out.” When Jyn doesn’t say anything in response, Lyra asks, “Am I wrong?”

Jyn only shrugs in return. “I guess we’ll never know, will we?” She says, after a long pause.

“Indeed,” Lyra says, giving her daughter’s appearance an unimpressed glance. “What happened to you?” She asks.

Jyn looks down at her clothes, which are still covered in mud from earlier. “Oh, this? This is the fashion, Mom. All the kids are doing it.” When Lyra continues to look at her expectantly, Jyn relents and says, “My bike broke down on this muddy back road. I was trying to fix it, but Bodhi had to come get me.”

“I hate that stupid bike,” Lyra says. “You should get a reliable car. Like Bodhi has.”

“Bodhi has a company car, Mom,” Jyn says, exasperated. “And it looks like a blueberry.”

“Hey,” Bodhi interjects. “My car is nice.”

Jyn waves him off as her mother asks, “And you have nothing better to do on a weekday than drive around on your motorcycle? Do you even have a job?”

“As a matter of fact, I do,” Jyn says, as she pulls out the seat across from her mother and drops into it, “I happen to be working for the SBPD. On a case. And an important one at that!”

Bodhi doesn’t point out that the police aren’t paying her and that she’ll go to jail if she fails, mostly because he knows that Jyn just said it to get a reaction out of her mother. And she certainly gets it. Lyra’s face drops and she asks, astonished, “You? Working for the police?”

“Just like you always wanted,” Jyn says, leaning back in her seat triumphantly.

“I wanted you to become a cop. A real police officer,” Lyra says sharply. “Am I right in assuming that’s not what happened?”

“I’m consulting,” Jyn says, which is being awfully generous, Bodhi thinks to himself.

“And why would they want you to consult on a case?”

“Because,” Jyn begins, and Bodhi can see her trying to figure out what to tell her mother that will be easier than the truth. She sighs, closing her eyes, bracing herself. “Because I told them I was psychic.”

Lyra blinks a few times, very quickly, but otherwise shows no signs of shock. “You did what now?” She finally asks.

“I’ve been calling in tips to the police, stuff I’ve noticed from the news or the paper, using the skills you taught me,” Jyn explains. “But the last time, I gave them my name, by accident. And they kind of thought I was responsible for the crime. I told them I was psychic so they wouldn’t arrest me.”

“And then they just hired you to work on a case?” Lyra asks, disbelieving. “No questions asked?”

“Basically,” Jyn says with a shrug. Once again, she conveniently leaves out the part where she’ll be arrested if she doesn’t solve the case, but Bodhi still thinks it’s better not to mention it.

Lyra, for her part, seems to know Jyn isn’t telling her the whole story and she’s clearly weighing whether it’s worth interrogating her daughter further. “That department has really gone downhill since I left,” she says instead.

“Thanks, Mom.”

“So why are you here?”

“What do you mean?” Jyn asks. “I heard from Officer Macklemore—”

“Macklin,” Bodhi corrects.

“I’ve heard it both ways,” Jyn says to him, before looking back at her mother. “Anyway, I heard from Officer Macbook that you were back in town, and I came to confront you about it.”

“How is Macklin, anyway? Last time I saw him, his arthritis was acting up and giving him a lot of trouble,” Lyra says.

“How would I know anything about his arthritis?” Jyn asks impatiently. “All he said was to tell you hi from him.”

“Well, that’s very nice of him,” Lyra says pleasantly.

“Mom!”

“What, Jyn?” Lyra suddenly snaps. “You expect me to believe that you actually came here because you were so upset that I hadn’t told you I was back in town. Do you think I’m stupid? I know you don’t care! So, you can either tell me what you really want from me, or we can keep talking about my old coworker’s joint problems. Either way suits me fine.”

The silence that follows Lyra’s outburst is excruciatingly awkward. Jyn has a look on her face that Bodhi has never seen before, and he’s pretty sure it’s because she’s about to burst into tears. In their time as friends, Bodhi has seen Jyn go through some shit, including some truly awful arguments with her mother, but he’s never once seen her cry. He has no idea what to do in this situation—will reaching out for her make it worse? Should they just leave? Before he can do anything, though, Jyn drops her head into her hands and sighs.

“I can’t figure it out,” she says, shakily. “I cannot figure this damn case out. I mean, I found the bodies and everything, but it still doesn’t make sense. The cops think it’s a murder-suicide, open and shut. But it doesn’t feel right and I can’t prove otherwise.”

Lyra is looking at Jyn intently, waiting for her to say more, but she doesn’t. She just sits there, head in hands, looking small and exhausted. After what feels like an eternity, Lyra speaks. “How many hats?” She asks quietly.

Jyn takes her hands away from her face to glare at her mother. “What?”

“How many hats are there in the room?” Lyra asks again, even more calmly.

“I heard you. I just can’t believe you want me to do this right now!”

“You’re out of practice, and you’ve gotten soft. That’s why you can’t solve the case,” Lyra suggests with a shrug. “Now, tell me how many hats.”

“Mom, this is a stupid game from when I was a kid. I’m not gonna—”

“If you can’t do it, just say so.”

“Ten,” Jyn says, not breaking eye contact.

“Go on, then. And don’t cheat.”

Jyn sighs, a deep, frustrated noise, and closes her eyes. “Four baseball caps on the guys at the bar,” she says. “The couple in the booth at the back are both wearing cowboy hats; his is leather, hers is straw. The family at the table in the corner have a baby in a sun hat and a boy in one of those rainbow beanies with the spinner on top, which I didn’t even know existed in real life, so that’s interesting. There’s a captain’s hat hanging on the wall with all of the other junk that counts as decor in this godforsaken place. And when we came in, the chef was out talking to the bartender and he was wearing a hat. I assume we were going from when we walked in, yeah?” Jyn asks smugly.

Lyra nods and smiles. “You missed one,” she says.

“No, I didn’t.”

“Yes, you did. The woman at the bar.”

Jyn doesn’t even look. “She’s wearing a visor. A visor isn’t a hat.”

“What is it, then?”

“Ugly,” Jyn says, simply. “And it’s red, because I know that’s what you’re going to ask next.”

“Not bad,” Lyra admits.

“I’m not out of practice,” Jyn says fiercely. “I’m as sharp as I’ve ever been.”

“You just needed to focus on something else, instead of the case,” Lyra says. “You were getting so bogged down in the particulars that you couldn’t think straight. Happened to me all the time, when I was on the force. I’ll bet your mind feels clearer now, doesn’t it?”

Jyn blinks at her mother in disbelief. “Were you actually being helpful just now?” She asks.

“Believe it or not, I’m usually trying to help you, Jyn. Even when you think I’m not.”

Jyn looks at her mother for a long moment, her brow furrowed in concentration. Suddenly, she slaps her palm on the table and turns to Bodhi. “I need you to bring me to the police station,” she says, urgently.

“Did you figure it out?” He asks.

“No, but I’m going to. I just need to look at the case file again.”

“How are you going to do that?”

“I know a guy,” Jyn says vaguely.

“Alright. Do you want to go home and change first?” Bodhi asks, gesturing at her still-muddy clothing.

“What? No! Honestly, I think I might be onto something. This is a Look, right here,” Jyn says, standing up.

“If you say so,” Bodhi says, as she starts pulling him towards the door.

They don’t make it far, however, before Jyn stops suddenly. She turns halfway back to her mother, looking completely lost. A moment of deliberation passes before Jyn says, “Thanks, Mom.”

Lyra looks up at her daughter and surprise flashes across her face, briefly. She raises her beer in salute and Jyn smiles.

“To the blueberry!” She shouts at Bodhi, and links their arms together.

“We’re not calling it that,” he says, only to be ignored. “Jyn, I’m serious!”

Jyn pushes the door open and drags him out into the night, still paying his complaints no mind.

***

“Sorry, I’m still not clear on why he’d be willing to help us,” Bodhi says, keeping his voice low so as not to attract any further notice from the other cops at the precinct.

“Quid pro quo,” Jyn says, kicking her feet up on the desk in front of her. “I helped him, he’ll help me.”

“He said that?”

“His eyes did.”

“What did his mouth say?” Bodhi asks, suppressing an eye roll.

“I don’t know. I wasn’t listening. I was too busy staring longingly into his eyes.”

“You’re ridiculous,” he says, shaking his head. “How exactly did you help him?”

“I solved that stupid armed robbery case for him,” Jyn says.

“You did?” Bodhi asks. “That’s amazing. Doesn’t that mean they can’t arrest you for it now?”

“They can’t arrest me for that, but they can arrest me for obstruction still.”

“Damn. So who was the guy’s partner?”

“Ah, that’s the thing,” Jyn says, relishing her Poirot moment a little too much. “He didn’t have one.”

“What?”

“He made it up, to get the immunity deal. Created this whole shadowy figure who masterminded all the robberies to stall the police and he took a gamble that they’d believe him. It was complete bullshit.”

“How did you figure that out?” Bodhi asks, astonished.

“Miss Erso is extremely well-versed in the art of bullshit,” a voice says from behind him. He turns to see Detective Andor approaching them with a cup of coffee in his hand.

“Oh, Detective. I’ve asked you to call me Jyn, and I meant it,” Jyn says, her face lighting up with mischief.

“And I’ve never asked you for anything, so I don’t really understand what you’re doing here,” he shoots back. “And with your feet on my desk, no less!”

Jyn swings her feet off the desk and onto the floor in one graceful motion. “You need to lighten up, Detective, or you’re gonna go gray prematurely,” she says. “Then again, you’d look distinguished, so maybe it’s worth it.”

“What can I do for you, Miss Erso?” He asks, looking tired.

“Jyn. And I need to see the file for the McCallum case.”

“Can’t you see it with your third eye?”

“Would you look at that?” Jyn says to Bodhi, gesturing at Detective Andor. “He’s handsome and funny! If he has a good job, I’m putting a ring on it.”

Bodhi is about to roll his eyes at Jyn’s antics, but out of the corner of his eye, he sees Detective Andor crack a smile. Maybe Jyn’s antics aren’t as unwelcome as he thought after all.

“As flattered as I am, how do you know I’m not spoken for?” Detective Andor asks.

“I saw it with my third eye,” Jyn says, and he laughs.

“Mm. Good one. No, really. Do your,” he gestures at her with his coffee mug, “psychic thing. On me.”

Jyn’s eyebrows shoot up at that and Bodhi can see her resisting the urge to turn the detective’s statement into a dirty joke. “I don’t have to,” she says, finally.

“Sorry?”

“I don’t have to ‘do my psychic thing’,” Jyn says, using air quotes. “Anyone with eyes could see that you're single.”

“Is that so?”

“Yeah. First of all, you’re a cop, just like my mother. It didn’t help her in the romance department, either,” Jyn says, like she’s letting him in on a secret. “You lot work all the time, hence the bags under your eyes and the fact that you’re here right now, on a Friday night.”

“I could be leaving,” he suggests.

“You have coffee. At 8 PM.”

“Could be decaf.”

“It isn’t,” Jyn says with certainty. “You’re about to pull an all nighter to work on a case. And then you’ll eventually go home to your lonely bachelor pad and eat a meal for one you picked up in the freezer section because you’re ‘too busy’ to cook for yourself. How am I doing?”

“You’re close,” Detective Andor says, trying to be evasive. “But I could have a spouse who’s okay with me working Friday nights.”

“You could,” Jyn allows. “But you also don’t wear a ring.”

“Maybe I just don’t wear it at work.”

“That’s a possibility. But I don’t think so.” Jyn pauses for a second, watching the detective. “Come on, how’d I do?”

“Devastatingly accurate,” Detective Andor concedes. “Except for one part.”

“What’s that?”

“I’m a really good cook,” he says, sitting on his desk in the spot recently vacated by Jyn’s feet. She smiles up at him, delighted, and Bodhi’s pretty sure if he doesn’t do something they could be here all night. He clears his throat awkwardly.

Both of them startle, like they’d forgotten about him entirely. Detective Andor takes a sip of his coffee and places the mug on the desk. “What do you need the file for?” He asks, not quite looking at Jyn.

“Sometimes I do get random visions,” Jyn lies with ease. “But most of the time, my gift requires inspiration. I’m hoping something in the file will trigger it.”

“That case is basically wrapped up, though. I heard it was a murder-suicide between the McCallum kid and the guy he hired to fake his kidnapping,” Detective Andor says.

“I’m not convinced,” Jyn says seriously.

“Hey, from what I hear, they wouldn’t have found that cabin without you,” Detective Andor says, adopting a soothing tone. “Your work here is done. Don’t overthink it.”

“I’m thinking it just the right amount, thank you,” she replies. Detective Andor looks as if he is about to say something else, so she adds, quickly, “You have two options here, as I see it. You can get me that file now, or you can spend the whole night talking in circles with me, finishing none of your own work, and then you can get me the file.”

“Sounds like I’m getting you the file either way.”

“It’s just a matter of whether you have your dignity intact when you do,” Jyn says, throwing in a shrug for good measure. “Choose your own adventure, Detective,”

Detective Andor makes a big show of looking around, and then stands up. “I’ll be right back,” he says, needlessly, and walks away.

Jyn and Bodhi watch him go in silence for a few seconds, before Bodhi asks, “What’s going on there?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re flirting with cops now?”

“I was not flirting with him,” Jyn says, scandalized.

“Jyn, please.”

“I wasn’t,” she says, and she actually stamps her foot, like a child. “I can’t stand cops, you know that.”

“Right. You can’t stand that guy. You can’t stand him so much you just spent ten minutes pestering him about his marital status,” Bodhi says, unimpressed.

“He asked me to!”

“Oh, don’t get me wrong. He can’t stand you either. He can’t stand the idea of making you dinner in his tiny, sad apartment and he can’t stand the idea of having beautiful, hyper-observant children with you someday.”

“Bodhi,” Jyn says, slapping at him ineffectually. She’s laughing too hard to do so accurately.

“It’s one thing to seduce and abandon half the food service professionals in Santa Barbara, Jyn, but please don’t start sleeping with cops and never calling them again. My heart can’t take it,” Bodhi says, only half joking.

“I’m not gonna sleep with him,” Jyn replies, looking offended.

“Uh huh.”

“I’m not! Jesus!”

“You, Jyn Erso, are a bisexual menace to society,” he says gravely.

“I’m a bisexual philanthropist, thank you very much, and you, Bodhi Rook, can suck it,” she shoots back easily and lands a solid slap on his arm.

They’re still scuffling like that when Detective Andor returns and drops a file on the desk in front of Jyn. Her face lights up and she tears into the folder with enthusiasm. In addition to Jyn’s many other gifts, she’s also a very fast reader, so she makes short work of scanning through the entire file on the McCallum case. She flops back in the chair once she’s done with the last page, and Bodhi is pretty sure that’s not a good sign.

“Nothing?” He asks.

“Nothing,” Jyn confirms. She rubs her eyes. “I don’t even know what I’m looking for. It’s just that...something doesn’t feel right.”

“How so?” Detective Andor asks.

“It’s just a vibe I have.”

“This is some sort of psychic thing? Vibes?”

“You don’t get vibes? I thought everybody got those,” Jyn says.

“I’ve always thought of it more as intuition,” Detective Andor says with a shrug. “It’s not really a spiritual thing.”

“Well, the spirits are telling me there’s more to this case than meets the eye.”

“Your spirits can’t be more specific?”

“Apparently not,” Jyn says, closing the case file with more force than is really necessary. She tosses it gently back to Detective Andor. “Thanks, anyway.”

“Look, if you don’t mind me saying so, this could all be in your head,” he says. When Jyn gives him an annoyed look, he continues, “Hear me out. This probably isn’t the way you saw this case shaking out. Maybe it’s not that you missed something, or that there’s some cosmic imbalance afoot. Maybe you’re just disappointed. But that’s the work. You’ll have to get used to it if you want to keep doing this.”

“Keep doing what?”

“Consulting. You lead us right to the bodies. It might not be the way anyone wanted the case to end up, but you helped solve it. I wouldn’t be surprised if Interim Chief Mothma wanted to use you again.”

Jyn shakes her head. “You know what I still can’t wrap my head around?” She asks, rather than address what Detective Andor has said.

“How to accept a compliment?” Detective Andor suggests.

“Technically, everything you just said was a fact. None of it was actual praise,” Jyn says. Detective Andor gives her a half-smile and motions for her to continue. “What I don’t understand is why everyone thought this McCallum kid had finally turned his life around. From what I hear, this wasn’t his first try at it. He’d screwed it up before. And you even have a report in there of an incident between him and his father that got so heated the neighbors called the cops to intervene. Why was everyone in that family so surprised that this guy was still up to his old bullshit?”

“People can change,” Detective Andor says simply.

“You don’t honestly believe that, do you?” Jyn asks. When he just shrugs in response, she says, “But you’re a cop!”

“And I wouldn’t be one if I didn’t think this work could make a difference in someone’s life,” he says. “The McCallums didn’t think their son had changed. They hoped he had.”

“Lot of good that did them.”

“Better than the alternative, right? I’d rather hope for the best, than anticipate the worst all the time.”

“That’s a terrible way for a cop to think!”

“I didn’t say that’s the way I actually think,” he says. “Just that it’s how I would rather think.”

“You’re full of shit,” Jyn says, but she looks amused. Fond, even.

“See if I ever help you again,” Detective Andor says, gesturing at her with the case file. “I’m going to put this back before someone misses it,” he adds, and takes off, leaving Jyn and Bodhi alone again.

“That was a very tender moment between you two. I’m glad I got to be here for it,” Bodhi says, for lack of anything better to contribute.

Jyn snorts. “Shut up,” she says, but the expression on her face says her thoughts are still far off.

“Did it help?” Bodhi asks, nudging her with his foot.

“What?” Jyn says, turning her attention to him.

“Anything Detective Andor just said.”

“Oh, no.” Jyn responds, then winces. “I mean, it’s not bad advice, but I just can’t get over this feeling that I’m missing something. I just don’t believe it, you know? That this rich kid botched his own kidnapping so badly that his dirtbag partner turned on him, killed him, and then killed himself because he couldn’t live with the guilt. Oh, and speaking of guilt, this kid’s strict father felt so badly about his son’s disappearance that he apparently tried to kill himself too? Even though he tried to write his son out of his will for being a fuck up? Like, none of it adds up. It doesn’t feel right at all.”

“Wait, what happened with his father?”

“He had this will drawn up—”

“No, you told me about that. You didn’t mention his suicide attempt.”

“Oh, well, I don’t know that for sure,” Jyn says. “When I visited the McCallum house, Mr. McCallum had a bandage on his wrist and he got antsy when I asked him about it. But I overheard some of the help talking and they were saying he tried to kill himself after his son disappeared.”

“So that’s all speculation,” Bodhi says.

“Well, yeah.”

“But you don’t believe it?”

“I mean, it could be anything, really. I tried to look through their medicine cabinets to see if I saw anything that would suggest what kind of injury it was, but it was mostly generic stuff, like ibuprofen and allergy medicine. The only name I didn’t recognize was Zin...Zinfandel?”

“That’s a wine, Jyn.”

“Damn it. Uh, Zin… zinacef? Is that something?”

“Yeah. Zinacef is a brand name for cefuroxime. It’s an antibiotic.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, for people who are allergic to penicillin.”

“And why would they prescribe it?”

“Like most antibiotics, to treat an infection,” Bodhi says. “And if he had an injury to his wrist, it’s probably because the doctor was worried that the source of the cut could have infected him.”

“What do you mean?”

“Like, if he cut himself on, I don’t know, a rusted nail or something. Although you’d be more worried about Tetanus in that situation. Maybe an animal bite? Like a cat or a—”

“A dog?” Jyn suggests, interrupting him. Her eyes are wide and she’s leaning forward in her seat.

“Sure,” Bodhi says, shrugging. “Why? Does that mean something?”

“Yeah, it does! McCallum Jr.’s friend who helped him fake the kidnapping had a dog. I saw it at the cabin. It all makes sense now!” Jyn practically shouts.

“It does?”

“Yes! Bodhi, you’re a genius!” She says, grabbing his face in both her hands.

“I am?” Bodhi says.

“Yes, you are!”

“That’s nice. But please don’t kiss me. Your cop boyfriend is coming back and I don’t want him to tase me in a jealous rage.”

Jyn lets him go. “I wasn’t going to kiss you, and Detective Andor is definitely not going to tase you,” she says, rolling her eyes.

“I notice you didn’t deny that he was your boyfriend, though.”

“You’re a child!”

“Takes one to know one!” Bodhi shoots back. Jyn reaches out as if to slap him, but he quickly says, “Look alive, he’s on his way over.”

“Shit, I gotta make up a vision,” Jyn says. “This fake psychic thing is way harder than it looks on TV.”

“Yeah, we all feel real sorry for you.”

Jyn glares at him in response as she raises her hand to her forehead in what’s becoming her default faking-a-vision pose. “Help me out,” she says, under her breath, as Detective Andor reappears.

“Oh, Detective Andor, thank goodness you’re back,” Bodhi says, hoping he sounds genuine. He’s doesn’t consider himself to be the world’s best liar. “I think she’s having a vision.”

Detective Andor, for his part, still looks utterly bewildered by the whole thing, so it’s Jyn who actually has to speak up. “I’ve seen our killer,” she says, completely serious.

“You’ve seen their face?” Detective Andor asks.

“No, their wrist,” Jyn replies.

“Their wrist? What good does that do us?”

“I can see it so clearly now,” Jyn says, covering her forehead with her hands. “They found McCallum in his cabin hideout. They figured out the kidnapping was staged before we did and they went to confront him about it. There was a scuffle, between McCallum and our killer. It was an accident, they didn’t mean to kill him, it just happened!”

As Jyn speaks, she keeps her eyes closed, as if she’s actually watching this all happen behind her eyelids. Bodhi can’t help but be impressed. She’s very convincing. For all the trouble it’s caused them, maybe this fake psychic thing is truly her calling. It’s such a ridiculous idea that he’s honestly surprised it didn’t occur to her sooner.

“After McCallum died, his partner came back to the cabin with his dog to find the killer still there. Our killer shoots him and stages it to look like a suicide, effectively pinning McCallum’s death on him instead, but not before the dog bites them and gets a piece of their wrist.” Jyn suddenly opens her eyes and sits back, her face clear of the anguish of her “vision”. She looks at Detective Andor and asks, “Do you know anyone with a mysterious wrist injury?”

Detective Andor blinks at her in disbelief for a few seconds before realization dawns. Then, he quickly reaches for his keys on the desk. “We have to get to the McCallum residence. I’ll call for backup on the way,” he says, and he’s already heading for the exit.

“Are we supposed to follow you?” Jyn shouts after him.

“Yes, let’s go.”

“Alright,” Jyn says, standing up and smacking Bodhi on the knee. “You heard the man. Let’s go catch a murderer.”

“Today has been the weirdest day of my life,” Bodhi says, shaking his head but following after Jyn anyway.

“And it’s not even over yet,” Jyn says with excitement. She loops their arms together once more as they leave the precinct.

***

There’s a light drizzle falling from the sky as Bodhi stands on the front yard of the McCallum residence. Just like Jyn said at the beginning of the case, the house is beautiful and large and absolutely full to the brim with great art and other things that Bodhi would normally nerd out about. Standing there, though, on a rainy Friday night, surrounded by cop cars whose lights are making the whole place glow red and then blue on a constant loop, Bodhi can’t honestly enjoy himself too much.

Mr. McCallum Sr. had been put into a car by an astonished looking Detective Tuesso nearly twenty minutes ago, after admitting to killing his son and his accomplice. The rest of the cops on the scene are still inside taking statements from the other people in the house and getting other relevant details so that they can finally close the case. The atmosphere in there became too much for Bodhi eventually and he excused himself to wait for Jyn outside.

When she finally finds him, he’s looking up at the sky for no particular reason other than the flashing lights from the cars are starting to hurt his eyes.

“You look very emo,” Jyn says, taking in his pose as she approaches.

“You just solved a murder,” Bodhi replies.

“Yeah,” she says, with no small amount of pride in her voice.

“That guy killed his own son.”

“Yeah,” Jyn says, this time sounding somber.

“That’s…” Bodhi starts to say, but he can’t really find the words. “That’s a lot,” he finally settles on, even though it’s nonsense. Jyn will understand, he thinks.

She, of course, nods in response, before also looking up at the sky. “It is. A whole fucking lot,” she says, and he’s glad she gets it.

They stand there in silence for a moment, just listening to the rainfall and the buzz of activity coming from the house behind them. It feels like the first time in hours he’s actually relaxed, ever since he got that call from Jyn this afternoon. He can’t even imagine how she feels.

“Couldn’t have done it without you,” Jyn says, suddenly. Bodhi looks over at her only to find her already looking at him.

“Yeah, you could’ve,” he says.

Jyn shakes her head. “No. You saved the day.”

“We’re a good team,” Bodhi responds, trying to deflect her praise.

“That we are,” she agrees. “But I’ve always known that.”

“Yeah, no surprise there.”

At that moment, another police car pulls up and a few people get out. One of them, a woman, spots Jyn and walks in her direction.

“Miss Erso,” the woman calls as she approaches.

“Interim Chief Mothma,” Jyn greets her in return. “Good to see you again.”

“I believe we have you to thank for solving this case,” the Chief says.

“Oh, well, I suppose,” Jyn says. “But I had lots of help.”

Interim Chief Mothma’s eyebrows raise in surprise at that. “You did?” She asks.

“From the spirits, of course,” Jyn says, gesturing vaguely upwards.

“Of course,” the Chief echoes. “Well, thank you for your assistance,” she says, offering her hand to Jyn.

“Happy to help,” Jyn replies, shaking the other woman’s hand

“Oh, that reminds me,” Interim Chief Mothma says. “I spoke to your mother on the phone earlier.”

“You did?”

“Yes. As she’s a former member of the department, I wanted to get her take on your value as a consultant and ask her about your abilities. I have to say, you two need to get your stories straight.”

“We do?” Jyn says, and Bodhi can hear the nervousness in her voice. As for himself, he’s pretty sure he’s having a heart attack.

“Yes, you do. Your mother says that your gift didn’t present itself until you were eleven, but when you and I spoke the other day, you said you’d had your psychic abilities since birth,” the Chief says.

“That’s my mother for you,” Jyn says, easily, even though Bodhi can still see the tension in her shoulders. “She always has to undermine me! Just because she didn’t notice my abilities before I was eleven, doesn’t mean I didn’t have them. I’ve told her this a thousand times!”

“Well, I appreciated her insight,” Interim Chief Mothma says. “And I appreciate your work on this case.”

“Thank you, but I couldn’t have done it without Bodhi,” Jyn says, gesturing at him. “My chauffeur,” Jyn elaborates, for the Chief’s benefit.

“Ah, of course,” she says, looking bemused. She shakes Bodhi’s hand anyway, which gives him something to do besides elbow Jyn in the ribs. “Thank you both.”

One of the officers calls for her then, and Interim Chief Mothma leaves them with a wave. Jyn and Bodhi look after her for a few seconds before Jyn says, “That was close.”

Bodhi lets out a breath of relief. “No kidding,” he says. “I cannot take anymore stress today. I just can’t.”

“Okay, buddy. Let’s get you home,” Jyn says, patting his shoulder.

“We can leave?”

“Yeah, whenever we want. The cops are done with me for now.”

“Awesome,” Bodhi says, before he remembers the problem. “But my car is still at the precinct.”

“Oh, yeah. Cassian said he’d bring us back when we were ready.”

“Who?”

“Detective Andor.”

“You called him ‘Cassian.’”

“Did you think his first name was Detective?” Jyn asks, rolling her eyes at him.

“You’re on a first name basis with him now?” Bodhi asks, unable to help himself.

“Relax. It’s no big deal,” Jyn says, crossing her arms over her chest. “You can call him that too.”

“I should hope so. He’s going to be my best friend-in-law someday.”

“I hate you,” Jyn says, but she’s smiling a little. “I’m going to go find Cassian and ask him to take me back to the precinct. And I’m gonna leave you here. You can walk home, for all I care.”

“If you want some alone time with your boyfriend, all you have to do is ask,” Bodhi replies. Jyn flips him off, which is all the encouragement he needs. “You two, alone in a police cruiser. Very romantic.”

“Don’t give me ideas, Bodhi Rook,” she says, and then she turns on her heel and heads back towards the house.

Smiling to himself, Bodhi follows her.

***

Unsurprisingly, Bodhi doesn’t hear from Jyn for a few days after the McCallum case wraps up. He assumes she’s catching up on all the sleep she missed while she was working the case, an old habit of hers he remembers from when they were in high school. She would always wait until the last minute on projects, pull all-nighters to finish them, and then sleep for days afterwards. For all solving murders and writing research papers are completely different, Bodhi thinks that Jyn’s method of recovering is probably the same for both.

Given the amount of emotional upheaval she went through, Bodhi actually figures it will take longer for Jyn to recover after this, but it’s only Monday when he receives a text from her asking him to meet her that afternoon when he’s done at work.

Sure. At your place? He replies immediately.

No. I’ll text you the address. Her reply comes twenty minutes later.

Why are we meeting at a mystery location?

I have something I need to show you!

You’re making me nervous…

You’re always nervous. See you at 4:30.

Jyn actually remembers to text him the address about ten minutes before he’s planning on leaving the office, and the map on his phone shows that it’s right by the water, but there’s no businesses listed there. Whatever Jyn is trying to do, it’s going to be a surprise, despite Bodhi’s best efforts. He sighs, before gathering his things and heading out for the night.

It’s a short ride from his office to the address Jyn sent him and he finds himself pulling into the small parking lot of a tiny, one story office building that faces the beach. He recognizes the only other vehicle in the lot as Jyn’s motorcycle, so this must be the place. There’s a wide window on the front of the only office housed in the building and, when Bodhi gets out of his car, he sees that there’s a sign painted on the glass that reads, “PSYCH” in big letters and, underneath that in a smaller script, it says, “private psychic detective.”

“Oh, no,” he says to himself, before pulling open the door.

“Bodhi,” Jyn greets him cheerfully when he enters the room.

“Are you out of your mind?”

“Depends on who you ask,” she says. “Why? What did I do?”

“You rented office space, for your psychic detective agency! Which is a career you’ve had for less than a week! And, by the way, you’re not actually psychic!”

“Oh, that,” she says, waving a hand at him, as though his are petty concerns.

“You’re not actually naming it that, are you?” Bodhi asks.

“No, Bodhi. I just paid them to hand paint it on the window because I’m a patron of the arts with money to burn.”

“You can’t call it that,” Bodhi says, ignoring Jyn’s joke and changing tactics.

“Why not?

“Psych?” He says, hoping hearing it aloud will make her understand. When she just looks at him blankly, he adds, “As in ‘Gotcha!’”

“No. Psych, as in psychic,” Jyn says, throwing in some jazz hands for good measure.

“It doesn’t read that way.”

“Oh, whatever.”

“Actually, I have a great idea,” Bodhi says, rubbing his forehead. “What if you called it, ‘Hey, We’re Fooling You and the Police, Hope We Don’t Make a Mistake and Someone Dies Because of It.’”

“As catchy as that is, I think that would take up too much space on the window,” Jyn says seriously. “It would interrupt our ocean view and you have no idea how much that cost me.”

“Speaking of which, how did you even get this place? I know your credit score is terrible.”

“True. But yours isn’t.”

“Mine?” Bodhi asks. “What does my credit score have to do with it?”

“You co-signed the lease with me.”

“Funny, I don’t remember doing that.”

“Well, you’re a busy man. I didn’t want to bug you with the trivial details, so I signed for you,” Jyn says innocently.

“Jyn!”

“It’s not my fault that your signature is easy to forge!”

“That’s not even remotely the problem here,” Bodhi says, his annoyance clear in his voice. “What real estate agent would allow this?”

“A really terrible one.”

Bodhi groans and covers his face with his hands. Jyn crosses the room to pat him consolingly on the shoulder.

“Hey, lighten up. This is gonna be fun! You and me, solving crimes together,” she says.

That’s enough to pull Bodhi out of his despair and he gives Jyn a disbelieving look. “Jyn, what are you talking about? I already have a full-time job,” he says.

“Oh, believe me, I know. You’re always talking about it, with your steady paycheck and your dental plan and your 411K,” Jyn says bitterly.

“It’s a four-OH-one-K, Jyn.”

“I’ve heard it both ways.”

“I’m not leaving my job,” Bodhi says firmly and he sees Jyn’s face fall. “But, I can help you with cases in my spare time, if you’d like.”

“I would like,” Jyn says, smiling. “I would like very much.”

“Good. Partners?” He says, offering his fist for her to bump, which she does.

“Partners. Of course,” Jyn says, and the two of them enjoy approximately thirty seconds of peace before a noise outside catches Jyn’s attention.

“Okay, look alive,” she says, smoothing out her shirt. “Our 5 o’clock is here.”

“What?!” Bodhi asks, shocked. “You have a client already?”

“We gotta keep the lights on somehow,” Jyn replies.

“The Jyn I know has never paid an electricity bill on time in her life,” he says, eyeing her suspiciously.

“Well, maybe I’m turning over a new leaf,” Jyn says with a small smile, which Bodhi returns easily. If she’s really serious about this, he’s not going to stand in her way.

“I’m proud of you,” he says, pointing a finger at her emphatically.

She points back at him. “Thank you.”

At that moment, a young woman comes through the door, looking around cautiously. “Is this the psychic detective agency?” She asks.

“Yes, it is,” Jyn says. “And I’m the psychic detective, Jyn Erso.”

“Wow,” the young woman says, completely dazzled. She looks at Bodhi then, clearly confused as to his role.

Jyn, for her part, doesn’t miss a beat. “Allow me to introduce my associate, Burton Guster.”

Bodhi doesn’t bother correcting her, giving a small wave instead. This is his life now, after all.

[scarletpan-moved]

//all of the yandere asks

MemeAnswered 

                       @little-mx-roleplayer​ sent this same ask so I’ma tag them xD

                      CW: Violence, weapons, the stuff you associate with Yanderes

Favorite weapon?

Honestly I’d have to go with a blade-type weapon (more machete than knife), or something like a baseball bat. I love the feeling of the easy swing, its just so satisfying on the carry though. 

Least favorite weapon?

Guns are loud, less personal. Sure, you don’t have to get up close, but still. Plus, my elbow isn’t good enough to handle the kick of higher-powered guns, and lower-powered guns are just so mundane. Honestly, if you’re going to kill someone, do it right.

Possessive or obsessive?

As in which am I? I suppose more obsessive than possessive. I never demand someone’s entire attention, or all of their love. I’ll share. But I do think about my someone every moment of every day (or damn near close~) 

Masochistic, sadistic, both or neither?

Holy both, however my sadism does win over my masochism if you asked which was more prevalent. 

Favorite place to injure someone?

Head wounds are my favorite, there’s just something near poetic about managing a good one, but they don’t leave for much fun afterwards. Ruling that out due to that fact? Hands. There’s reason, but its sort of hard to put into words, so I’m just gonna leave it at that. 

Would you rather torture someone or kill them quickly?

Torture. Unless I’m in a really bad mood, its more fun. However, if the setting isn’t right then killing them quickly is the only option… It depends on the situation, you see. If they do die quickly though? There’s always overkill. 

Does your s/o know about your violent tendencies?

One of them nearly sent me this very meme, and the other will read it in the morning. One approves, the other… not so much. But that’s fine❤️

Favorite yandere?

I haven’t watched much yandere-centric media, but I’ll always adore Ayano from YandereSim, even if the game isn’t official yet. 

Least favorite yandere?

See above answer

Creepiest thing you’ve done to someone you love?

I high-key stalked my current boyfriend in middle school. He’s well aware now, but I followed him around school for an entire year, taking note of his interests and leaving things in his path (my journal with scripted entries and such) so he would have a reason to interact with me. Once interaction was gained, I proceeded to use what I knew about his interests for conversation. 

I’m not sure if it had any baring on us dating now or not, but it all worked out so!

Would you keep someone you love locked up?

Probably not, simply because that’s a lot of effort for something you can easily get caught at… And then there’s no fun. Plus, I’m not possessive. 

If your s/o cheated, would you harm them or whoever they cheated on you with?

It depends, did the person they cheated with know? If no, then they’re not at fault, are they? In that case, I would likely need to have a little chat with my s/o though. However if they did know then the chat can hold - I’ll teach them a lesson using the bitch as an example. 

However, I’m a little less likely to use physical means, and more likely to use words in this case. 

Also, if I actually did something to cause my s/o to cheat, that should be addressed before the chat.

Favorite yandere songs?

This Little Girl by Cady Groves &  Smoke and Mirrors Jayn

Would you actually kill someone?

I’d think about it very very hard. 

Now are you saying would I kill someone if I knew for a fact that no one would ever find out it was me? No repercussions? No orange jumpsuit? As a fact? 

Tempting, in that case~

If you had to dump a body, where would you dump it?

Before all of these, it is important to smash the teeth in some manner, as not even flame will save you from dental records. Also, getting rid of the murder weapon is equally as important, not not included.

When chopping, make sure to not use anything that leaves trademark striations in the bone, get the most generic tool you can find, something a hundred other people would have. Buy it ahead of time, or wait for a while after before burying (freeze the body to throw off the police when they’re trying to figure out a time of death).

Option 1: Chop up, burn, sewer system. The bacteria that break down all the other (literal) crap in there would take care of what wasn’t destroyed in the fire, plus liquid-damage alone makes things harder to identify. You simply have to be careful and make sure not to stop the system up, or allow any fragments to float up into people’s systems. 

Option 2: If possible, hydrofluoric acid. Brea.king Bad that shit, minus the ceiling-caving-in bits. 

Option 3: If possible, chop up, give body parts to gators (depends if I’m in Florida // Louisiana). Farewell, rival-dear. Plus, I’ve fed nature! 

Option 4: Last ditch option, only if nothing else is possible. Burn, chop up, travel far from my city (don’t shit where you eat). Bury in other towns / places, but leave one bit in the woods in your own city, so it doesn’t look suspicious (unless there’s a lot around you, this is based off of my area though). Bigger pieces, bury a dead animal about 3-4 feet above, so any dogs (police or otherwise) are thrown off. Resist the urge to put in a bag, you need it to decompose as quickly as possible. Also, apply insects/heat to area if possible, to quicken decomposition.

Do you own any weapons other than kitchen utensils?

I own one machete, three baseball bats (only one is at this house), two swords, four? knives, and a taser.

Is your blog a yandere appreciation blog or a vent blog for actual yandere thoughts?

Neither, its a general personal, however it has both on here. 

Be locked up or lock a loved one up?

I’d do anything for those I love, including get locked up to protect them. However, that list is incredibly short. There are people who should be loved ones, who I would rather lock up. 

Ever gotten caught doing something creepy, if so what?

During the stalk-my-current-bf time period, I got caught peeking into his locker numerous times to try and see what bands he had pictures of in there (it was MC/R and Link/in Par//k btw). I’ve also gotten caught sniffing my at-the-time s/o’s jacket before…. I don’t think I’ve ever been caught sniffing a not-s/o’s jacket though?

Ever actually psychically harmed someone for reasons to do with an s/o?

In protecting their honor, yes. 

Aka, someone was talking shit and I took offense to that. I bit someone for that once. Another time I dead legged someone. I’m typically more subtle than that, though.