#but i havent cried at all havent broken down i just feel no sense of urgency for anything and no drive to bring myself to do anything | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

wavesmp3 · 1 year ago

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hi! I read your 8000 layers of inyun yesterday. so it took me a whole day to digest it. Originally i was going to comment but realized i have too much to say so i went ahead and just did an ask, i hope you dont mind! This left me so breathless so i hope my review makes sense. I also apologize for the length but to be fair, your wonderful writing did this to me! i havent seen the movie yet but after reading this i just might. i was initially worried this will turn to something like a cheating situation or close but wow it went deeper than that. even if y/n is in a happy and healthy marriage, theres that grief over that inyun and wondering if a little more time with jeonghan would have been 8000.

The layers of this story is so beautifully laid out in details and the legend of inyun. As someone who had moved countries alot, i am so glad you captured the complexity of leaving home. From not understanding why y/n liked tompkins square park initially, the statue of liberty, and being that person that was always meant to "leave". The way jeonghan poses questions and seems to both understand y/n and also not is such a good take on long distance friendships. I like how its jumping between knowing each other so well but also knowing that you may not bc of the distance and the fact they havent spoken in years. I love how reading this story made me feel melancholic, hopeful, and also satisfied. Melancholic because of the what could have beens, hopeful because sometimes the differences and distances won't fully sever ones connections with each other (in this case inyun if im understanding it correctly) and satisfied because each character had their own maturity and understanding over each other. That mattered to me cause well, drama is very prominent nowadays, no? Is it weird to say that they acted the way 30 year olds should? jhgkdf so this was great! My favorite parts: you don’t remind him to do so once you finally find your keys. instead you slip off your old, faded sneakers, drop your keys on the counter in the lime green dish you made in a pottery class two years ago, and greet him in the kitchen, kissing the side of his chin and reaching over his head to turn the exhaust fan on. he kisses your forehead as an apology, or at least he tries but you’ve already moved and his lips end up catching on the corner of your left eye.

i love the tiny details that are a testament to a marriage.

but beneath the straightforward request feels like a million subliminal ones. like he wants you to prove to him that you’ve made a life worth living here. like he wants to gallivant around new york telling you about a country that used to be home and asking you what would have happened if you didn’t go all those years ago.

ngl, this hits close to home again bc when you leave home, people will always wonder the same thing.

there used to be oceans and countries and cultures and decades standing between you and him, but somehow now, all of that has compressed into four squares of broken concrete. you were never very good at maths. jeonghan, the one who comforted you whenever you cried over it, knows that best. but even you know that there is no way 20 years can turn into 20 feet.

this was just so damn poetic, i actually had to pause and BREATHE.

and the call ends in 4 minutes.

this was really short but captures how your world can turn upside down in just a few minutes.

“i came to see you.”

you don’t take your eyes off his. what is it they say about eyes again? windows to the soul?

“but you and joshua.”

you flinch.

“you guys have those layers of inyun.”

“all 8000,” you whisper back to him, like the world might burst if you spoke any louder.

its like toeing between a confession or congratulation sdkjhfdkjgh

“how many layers do we have?”

a number hangs off the tip of your tongue. but the world will burst if you say it outloud. so you don’t. for the world, for yourself, for joshua.

y/n was very real for this and honestly not everything has to be said. i really love this part because it shows y/n's integrity and also her wisdom.

“you’re it for me.” joshua tells you quietly. “you make my life so much bigger.”

my gosh, the way i nearly cried here. WHY SETTLE FOR I LOVE YOU WHEN THERE'S THISSSSSS???!!!

“but i-” he hesitates here, mouth opening and closing like he can’t decide what kind of conversation he wants this to be. “it’s like there’s this whole portion of your brain that will always be out of reach. like i can see it there in the distance, but i can’t get to it.”

this makes total sense but i cant explain it. its like you want to know every version of someone before they came to be what you know but you know you can't but theres still that grief.

“i didn’t think liking your husband would hurt this much.” (almost). “i can tell he really loves you.”

bc how can you not like him? it def hurts to like him bc that means he's already won anyway.

“yesterday, you asked me why i didn’t try to keep talking back then.” jeonghan continues. “the truth i learned here is that it wouldn’t have mattered how hard i tried even if i did. you were always going to leave because you’re you. and i liked you because you’re you. and who you are is someone who leaves.”

THIS DID MAKE ME TEARY EYED. I was told the exact last sentence before. And i understand how you can't really help it..life is so big and for some, life outside your home country is even bigger.

“but for joshua,” jeonghan says, eyes scanning across the bar, staring at every bartender and every customer before finally, finally, landing on you, “you’re someone who stays.”

no words. really. you blew my mind.

“i haven’t been that kid for a long time now,” you frown, watching jeonghan’s pupils dart back and forth between yours, “but they still existed. they were still real.”

this is very important bc connections and who you once were in the past are very much real...they just don't die because its past. This does circle back to the inyun theme too.

he smiles. and you feel something break apart in your heart.

“i’ll see you then.”

in another life, jeonghan is more than just a series of goodbyes. but in this one, he gets in the uber, and you don’t imagine seeing him again. you don’t think you will. because for the first time in this life, you're not the one that left–he was.

In another liiiifeeee, I would be youuuurrr giiiirrllll

“i’m sorry,” you finally say, before falling into his arms. the sob that’s been waiting in the bottom of your soul for the past 20 years comes bursting out of your throat. you cry into your husband's shoulder. you feel the weight of all your past lives and all your future ones like they aren't in the past or in the future, like they're now beside you begging you to imagine what could’ve been and what was.

joshua holds the back of your head. he doesn’t say anything. he doesn’t need to. it’s all been said before. instead he kisses the corner of your eye and takes you home.

at this point i posted the whole fic. this ending? damn. I really had to take a break from my phone. This was wayyyyy to fitting of an end. I loved joshua's response and the corner of the eye? way to circle back! It's the grief over something you can't truly control but also the happiness of where you are now. I'm not sure how you wanted the end to be if its like a missed connection between jeonghan and y/n or if its grieving over what could have been, or the hope that maybe in the next one its them, or that joshua had always been it but theres that almost with jeonghan. Or it could be all of the above, still this was beautifully written. I apologize for the long review but i just had to express my awe and love for what you've written! Please don't feel obligated to reply just as long or at all! I just wanted to let you know how much your work stuck with me. Thank you for sharing this with us <3 I hope you have the bestest day ever! P.S This unreleased song of woozi fits too! What Kind of Future

i don't mind you leaving this ask at all and the length is more than fine, it's encouraged even!! when i got this ask, i started scrolling and gasped when i saw how long it was. and not in a bad way but in a-i can't believe anyone would take the time to write all this out-way. so thank you thank you thank you!!!

i am going to put the rest of my response under the read more :)) (warning my response is very long lol)

when i was watching the movie/the trailer for the movie i also had very similar concerns that it would be a cheating plot, and i don't really enjoy cheating plotlines much so it was such a pleasant surprise when it was the opposite almost?? i was in awe. and the last sentence of your paragraph here, really hits the nail of what i was trying to do with this piece and what i think the film was doing as well. the sadness over what could have been but what isn't, while also appreciating and enjoying what is. you should most definitely watch the movie though! especially since you also immigrated countries. the story of the movie is based off something that actually happened in the director's life and it's just such a raw beautiful story that is so so real and authentic. i have never actually migrated to another country before, so everything about that was either from the movie or just me imagining what that would be like based on either my background (my parents are immigrants) or other media. anyways, im being extremely wordy, but basically, the experience of the main character here isn't one that i share with them, but the director of the movie does! so you should check it out !

i really liked how you brought up the tompkins square park part and how main character doesn't like it anymore because it almost feels like another reflection of them leaving a place they used to call home and not really feeling like they belong there or like they're that person that lived there anymore. kind of a mirror of how they feel about their home country.

everything you've said here is just sooo spot on!! you understood this piece wholly and completely.

and it's not a weird thing to say at all that they acted like 30 year olds haha in my head i actually imagined them as around that age lol, like early 30 somethings

and what you said about drama... yes! i think this piece would be considered a drama but it's not dramatic. it's such an understated and subtle drama that feels like it's happening in the silences of conversations. (this holds true for the movie especially. i think in interview or something the director said that this story is told mainly through by what isn't being said, it's told through the silences)

abt your fave parts:

i love adding little details like that in, details that make the characters and their lives feel like they go off the pages of the story,, so im really happy that you liked that

abt the line that goes "there used to be oceans and countries..." -- im so so so glad you liked it, i put a lot of effort and made a lot of different versions of this line. so im glad it hit for you the way i hoped it would

and what you said about toeing between confession and congratulation... yup! yeah! exactly!

the line that goes "you're it for me... you make my life so much bigger" was a mash up of a line from the movie and something someone said to me irl :) and it was indeed a very beautiful way to confess love

dang someone actually telling you that exact sentence before is absolutely insane!! im starting to think that maybe you should be the one to write this piece seriously! but also, you have GOT to watch this movie

im so glad you enjoyed the ending!! it's my favorite part as well!! the corner of the eye thing!! so happy you picked up on that. as for what i wanted to the end to be like.... i am a sucker for an open ending and although this ending is less open than others i have written it still is pretty vague... so to your answer your question, the ending is whatever you want it to be. honestly, i don't even know what the ending should be like. but the options you listed (missed connection, or grieving what could have been, etc.) are all ones that were also bouncing around in my mind as i watched the movie and wrote this piece. (for me, i think its mainly grieving what could have been, but also just a mesh of all 4 of the ones you said. emotions can be quite complex huh?)

again, pls don't apologize for the length of this review. it's a dream come true. thank you again for reading this piece, thinking so highly of it, and taking the time to leave this review for me. it makes all the brain rot i had over this film worth it. jk but again thank you. this review made my day and put the biggest smile on my face :))) i hope you have a wonderful day

#asks #8000 layers of inyun #another small note about the line at the end where joshua kisses the corner of reader's eye which was a comment i left on my google doc lol #start quote #'its said a little bit ago that joshua wrote an article abt how eyes are the only exposed part of someone's nervous system #how it's a direct line to someone's head and heart. so this kiss he places on your eye is more than just that. it's more.#and it also calls back to that scene from the beginning... did he really miss your cheek? or was he always aiming to reach your heart?'#end quote #anyways again than you for this ask!! i will be rereading it for days #:)))#OH also I will def be listening to that song thanks for the eec #rec*

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endious · 1 year ago

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UMM I NEED TO SEE HOW YOU PORTRAY LIU PLS AND THANK YOU

imma be real with you im in love with the idea of what liu COULD be but have never cared to actually look into his story or whatever SO ? we are going based off vibes my twisted mind has created. whether it makes sense or not or isnt “liu” or whatever I DONT CARE ! i havent put any dedication or thought into any character besides jeff LMFAO so i am struggling to grasp my idea of liu’s character. i’ll def work on it though in the future methinks

liu has aggressive moments with you. he doesnt exactly mean to be so rough but its so damn difficult when you refuse to talk to him or when you stare for too long at the stitches and scars on his face. stop staring at him like that. stop it. stop.

it’s a red blur for him when he becomes someone he “isnt”. your cries, begs for forgiveness and apologies falling from your lips breaks his heart after he’s calmed down and all that’s left is broken objects, his knuckles bare and bloody and your body trembling on the floor and shaking with sobs as you tell him you’re sorry over and over like a broken record. it hurts liu to see you like that, it wasnt him that did it.. it couldn’t be him. liu wasnt like that. that had to be someone else— sully is who he called his bursts of anger. maybe he really did become a totally different person when provoked like his brother would claim way back in the past. maybe he really did morph into a monster from time to time but it was not liu and dont you ever try to say it was. just nod your head and agree to whatever he says because its best that way. things always go smoothly when you obey and comply and he’s happy when you do so why dont you just stay that way.

liu tries to hold you often at night and gets irritated when you tense up or try to pull away from his eerily warm touch. “it’s just me. why are you so scared?..” it takes a lot to run his patience out too. he wants to give you multiple chances to fix your mistakes and he wont immediately bash your head into the closest object like jeff would. liu likes to claim he is very caring, just like mom always was towards him. he’s trapped in his own sick fantasy of living a happy life with you to the point where he will ramble to you about all of his thoughts and ideas and plans for you to the point where it makes your skin crawl over some of the things he’s said. one time he mentioned wanting to cut a piece of your hair off so he could smell it and be reminded of you when he’s not with you. another time he said he wanted to slice off some of your skin and keep it forever so it’s like you’re always with him when he has to leave. and another time he whispered how badly he wanted to cut your stomach open, pull your guts out and crawl inside of you. it’s insane the terrible things he’s said and thought were surely “romantic” but only left you sleepless and fearful for your life.

liu plays this pretend dream on loop and it’s best if you go along with it. accept his “love”, accept his thoughtful “gifts”, accept and thank him for keeping you “protected” from the bad men that want to take you from him. you’ll start spiraling too along with him. as much as you fight it and try to stay determined on keeping your sanity, it’s difficult when a man that pretends to be sane and shows you twisted acts of affection starts to make your mind slip a little deeper into that darkness with each passing day chained up in a bedroom of a unfamiliar home. and how giddy he feels when you start to give in to his touches and words. but if you tried to get away? if you managed to escape his tight grip on your life? you’re a dead fucking girl because liu will cry and scream in agony for days before anger boils over in his veins and it wont be liu who finds you, oh no it will be sully who begins his mission of retrieving the lost little lamb who led herself astray in the dangerous dense woods.

#— cadie answers #— nonnies #is this good ? fuck no LMFAO im actually so sorry for any liu whores </3 #i never read his “backstory” or whatever and i dont even read liu fics to get a grasp of him SO IM SORRY #this is so bad i will work on his character in the back of my mind sometimes LFMAO i hope this is fine someone please tell me if this is ba #or if its actually fine i need a liu fucker to let me know LMFAODOQODOOWDI

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prongsnapsalot · 6 years ago

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Hi i’ll delete this later i just needed to scream.

#i feel like an empty vessel that cant feel anything other than tired so i cant think or feel properly #idk which ppl to talk to rn #i used to be grade-conscious af but now i rly couldnt care less than I’m about to fail two classes and it just doesnt feel like im me at all #id normally be crying every night for the rest of the semester by now because im trying to grind my requirements#but i havent cried at all havent broken down i just feel no sense of urgency for anything and no drive to bring myself to do anything #i also cant bring myself to eat or take care of my other basic needs #rn im literally just an empty sack disappointing my friends #and groupmates and family and professors #my meds are not working and my doctor is out of the freakin country until october hahaha so what now

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pinkykitten · 4 years ago

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everything stays

chapter 1 - blood on her hands :: gisela klein [ an aot oc story ]

note: hey guys i know its been a rlly long time since ive posted anything and u may be rlly let down and underwhelmed that ive chosen to write a aot oc instead of fanfic but its what i want to write and i rlly love my oc and wanna give her some love and some praise and let u a little in how i see her. im sorry i havent posted a lot im going to try to write more and who knows i may or may not finish this but its ok imma try lol but life sometimes is a butthole. i hope you love her as much as i do an tysm for taking time out of ur day to read this story. enjoy!

Even though she knew that this day would have to come and that it was near, it still was a surprise for her. She was taken aback. It didn’t make sense and add up to her; she was trained for this since she was little; preparing mentally and physically for phase one of the plan; and the day appeared through the trees; past the wall; the opportunity was present; the fate of the people were waiting in their hands; and yet she felt a sense of evilness within her heart. Was this right? But there was no time.

The day was written down in history. The stories were spread around like a disease. Heights, jaws, teeth, feet, stench, the screams. If they survived that nightmare they were seen as a tough soldier; as someone that was applauded because they probably had PTSD and had to see everyday as a reason within themselves or God that they were alive. That maybe just maybe they were saved for a reason; for a purpose. That is what Gisela Klein thought. Maybe there was something greater out there for her to do, to accomplish and that was why she saw another day; breathed another breath.

But one thing was for sure. Forgiveness would never come her way; she would never expect it. To be a warrior she had to endure the horror; the pain; feelings of worthlessness; and friendships lost.

This is the story of the 10th finding titan; the Slash Titan.

The pounding of her heart rang through her ears. It had taken everything for her to keep going on this journey; to continue on the path to and through Hell. She felt a loss within her and the light in her eyes died out. The loss of her friend made it hard for her to function. To keep her head in the game and in the plan.

She sighed as she stared at her hands. Broken and bruised like her heart; scars and scratches scattered on her skin. Her bite mark deeply engraved into her flesh. She heaved a huge sigh. Ready to give death a handshake and make a deal with the devil. Panic was rising in her chest from her stomach, almost ready to throw up.

As she thought about her family back home she realized there was no other way; she had to do this. In order to be with her family, to save them she had to do the one thing she was trained to do.

Kill.

A lightning strike shot over the wall. The wall that kept the monsters away and at bay. Something was wrong; the air seemed to change. The lightning strike caused a boom, clap and the ground started to shake.

Bertholdt drew his leg back and with full force swung his leg forward, knocking a hole into the wall that was impenetrable. Many people flew back from the wind of the blow and some were crushed by the debris of the wall.

Many were going to die; but it’s what needed to be done.

The titans were called.

Finally the titans entered the devils homes and started to rip up their lives. “This is right, this is right.” Gisela had to keep reminding herself. “For my family.” And something snapped within her. The image of her mother, tortured, flashed in her mind. And suddenly everything was worth it. “No regrets.”

Gisela eyed Reiner, an agreement, a sign. She exhaled and in a quick motion placed her hand to her mouth and bit into it. In a spark she transformed into her titan form. Her eyes were much like a cats, sharp. She was made into the slash titan, she was chosen for this program. Her titans fingers were like sharp knives, able to cut any object or person. They hung a little past her knees.

Reiner then transformed and both stomped past the hole. Many citizens glanced up, horrified. Gisela and Reiner were titans never seen before.

She nodded to Reiner, bent down and started to pick up debris and pieces of houses to throw over the bigger wall. The chunks started to smash against people. Blood splattering everywhere. Gisela almost wanted to close her eyes from the immense amount of dead bodies piled on top of others, graves upon graves.

She was hauling boulders as high and fast as she could. Her titan held a high amount of power and strength. Being slim, muscular and as tall as the armored titan and female titan. Reiner took a step back and gained his speed to go onward to destroy the bigger wall.

“Fire!” Their soldiers cried out. Fear evident on their face. They shot their cannons, not even slowing down Reiner. Gisela continued flinging, wanting to create a path for Reiner. She was faster than before and many of her hits flattened the men in the front lines. Their screams and cries loud.

“Close the gate!” They tried, it was their last hope to save humanity. But it was not enough. Reiner broke the wall and killed those running and they went flying. They reached even higher than Gisela. It astounded her almost, they seemed like helpless birds flying high in the sky; but that thought was quickly wiped clean because the second they flew up in the air they came straight down with much force that many parts of their bodies broke.

Reiner did what he needed to do, he opened up a way for the titans to get in and they were swarming by the bunches.

In the distance, the survivors fled in boats across the river to get into the other walls. Gisela put herself in their shoes for a second. They had reason to be scared. Everything they have ever known was gone; their houses, loved ones, food, a place to feel the most comfortable you can feel despite situations; it was all gone. Gisela shook the thought out, not caring about these cruel humans feelings. They had none. No emotions. Gisela had to believe that thought; what she was told, she had to believe it with all her heart, or else what was real?

They waited till they were able to not be seen and Gisela turned human first and then so did Reiner. The four of them hopped on the boat. Talking amongst themselves. The wind howled through the vacant homes. Destruction everywhere. Gisela looked around her setting and saw a little girl had been crushed because a tree fell on her, her doll mere inches away from her grasp. She died with her eyes open; almost looking into Gisela’s soul through the eyes. Gisela’s body trembled and she threw up.

“Don’t.”

Gisela looked up to see Reiner wiping blood and debris off his clothes. He picked his sleeve and turned Gisela’s head to look away, he wiped her chin and mouth off the puke. He saw the trauma in her eyes and felt guilty. But it’s what needed to be done. He kept telling himself that the more he did this the more he would understand and get used to it. It was still all new to her and he had to be strong for her. He knelt in front of her small frame. “It’s not your fault. They needed to die. We are in this together. You don’t need them. Look at me.”

Gisela looked into his eyes, away from the sadness. His eyes carried the feeling of wanting to be wanted. That was always what Reiner wanted. But they also had fear in his eyes.

“Stop acting like you’re in control when I know how sick you feel. I know how afraid you are Reiner.”

He paused and took a look at his hands and others surrounding him. “You’re right. But I made a promise to Marcel.”

They joined the other citizens arriving at the food reserves. The master of disguise was needed in this mission. People needed to see four hungry, depressed children that survived the fall of their homes, not mass murderers.

Annie was only able to fetch two loaves. “Alright, who's the most hungry?”

“You girls should eat, you’re more feeble.” Bertholdt sat on a crate, pointing to Gisela and Annie.

Annie tsked, moving a bang from her eyes, “who says girls are more feeble? I recall kicking your ass all those times in training.”

“You guys can eat it, I’m not hungry.” Gisela sat on the other crate and saw the chaos of the crowds. A boy caught her interest. He had dark brown hair, tan skin, and light blue green eyes. He was having bread shoved in his mouth and he seemed to have such a strong personality to him. If only Gisela felt so strongly about her motive and her placement in this life.

“You really should eat, you need your energy after all you did.” Annie broke all the loaves in half and shared it amongst the four of you. “It’s not much but at least it's something.”

Gisela sighed, “you’re right. Thanks.”

After that day there was land given to only a few refugees but there were too many of them. Luckily the four of them had a piece of land that was enough until further inching themselves within society. Through that whole span each day was getting easier and easier living with the lies and day by day Gisela felt more at sure with herself and knowing that she could fulfill this mission. Pills and alcohol helped the pain and ease the thoughts. She taught herself to put a gap between what she came here to do and feelings. She told herself every day that nobody else mattered except her family and Reiner. She trained her brain to not care, to not have strings attached or any love for anything. It was all a play, all a rehearsal for when the curtain would fall. She was readying herself for that fall. Everyday she educated herself more on these scums. What they liked, wanted, needed, craved for, and what they craved more than ever in their life was freedom.

She trained her body as if it were her last day, barely getting sleep. The face of her mother haunting her every night making her get up at three in the morning to do pushups or sit ups. Not only was her mind getting stronger but also her body. Even Reiner would make jokes noticing the muscles that would appear. The six pack that formed on her stomach. Her thighs growing tight and firm, her arms growing stronger. The sweat growing on her forehead longer.

With her body growing her relationship with Reiner also changed. They no longer were the tiny children that didn’t understand anatomy or the air between two people. Reiner and Gisela’s relationship was of being flirty, sharing a few kisses here and there, trying to be a couple but then yelling at each other and breaking it up and realizing maybe this isn’t right a million times. Even Bertholdt and Annie were getting tired of their outbursts. But each time they made up to be friends only and then the cycle started where the feelings came in the way and they wanted to be more. They would tease each other, especially Reiner. They were each other's best friends. Gisela was like one of the boys, loud, obnoxious, burping all the time, Reiner would get a look at her and smirk thinking he taught her well. When Reiner looked at her he felt at home and that everything was going to be okay. Her nightmares continued and each time Reiner would come to her room and hold her, let her cry into his arms. She felt he was the only person that knew her pain.

Gisela understood many things in life and for once she understood her life here, she understood why she was born and chosen.

It was the following year and in order to get closer to finding the founding titan the four became part of the 104th cadet corps.

“Are you ready to train more?” Gisela nudged Reiner, eyebrow raised.

“What do you mean train more? This is going to be a new but scary experience honestly.” Reiner spoke as if he was a different person. As if he didn’t have a life outside of the walls.

“Reiner?” Gisela placed her hand on his shoulder, steadying him. He looked fine on the outside but Gisela knew the issues were inside, his mind. She knew this was becoming disastrous to him, he was starting to have almost two personalities, two lives, two worlds, two people. Gisela tried to tell Annie or Bertholdt, they saw it too but there was nothing they could do.

All that Gisela could do was smile as they made their way to the first day of training.

note: again ty y’all sm!!!! If u liked it lmk and this is kinda new for me cuz I usually don’t post my ocs stories here or much at all but I’m rlly excited for y’all to see her and for y’all to know this oc of mine and hopefully accept her ❤️

Taglist: @witchofinterest @chlobenet @eddysocs @fpxloomis @whctsherncme-archive @ocfairygodmother @fandomchick80 @ocappreciationtag

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twinkleton · 4 years ago

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first glance - douxie x reader fic

Hey! So, I couldn't sleep last and decided to spend my evening writing a douxie imagine because I can't get enough of him and wanted to contribute in some small way. Please bear with me, as I havent the slightest clue how any of this works, and I haven't written anything since 7th grade :')).

this is about the reader and douxie meeting for the first time! enjoy!

In hindsight, maybe she should’ve gone straight home. Anyone would’ve told her not to follow the strange grunting noises she heard coming from deep within the forested area of Arcadia. However, Y/N was never one to pass up a chance at helping someone. So, she hid her purse in the nearest bush, took out her only choice of weapon, pepper spray, and dashed towards the noise.

As she ran closer and closer, she could hear a man’s voice repeating strange words that definitely weren’t English. She could also hear a voice that definitely didn’t sound human. Still, if someone was in trouble, she had to be there. It was a reflex that she always assumed would lead her to her demise. The deeper she went, the more concerned she became at how she would even find her way back once she found whoever she was looking for. There was no one nearby to help, so if she had just put herself in a life-threatening situation, there would be no hope for her.

All thoughts came to an end as soon as she came to a sudden halt in her step. She honestly hadn’t a clue as to what she was witnessing. Instinctively, she ran behind a tree and took a second glance.

What she saw was a tall and slim man, dressed in dark clothing with hair and sweat cascading down his face, fighting a monster whilst surrounded by piles of broken stone. It was insanely large compared to the man, with skin that looked identical to rock except for carvings that seemed the glow within. The monster swung the hammer in it’s hand towards the man, but he jumped back in time to dodge it. “Tenebris Exilium!” he shouted, and suddenly a blast of blue light came from his hands and shot at the creature. It knocked it off its feet, throwing him into a nearby tree and slamming its back against it.

Y/N observed the man closer and noticed how heavy he was breathing. He was also clutching his side in pain. ‘He must have been fighting for a while’, she thought. As she concluded this, the creature stood up and charged at the man. He threw himself to the floor, rolling off to the side. This must’ve been the monster’s plan, as it jumped up and landed right on top of him. The creature brought his hammer down, aimed at the man’s head. Using only his left arm, which is seemingly supported by a unique looking bracelet, he blocks the attack.

This begins a battle of strength between the two, however it’s the creature who has the upper hand. ‘I have to do something,’ Y/N reasoned.

She searched her surroundings, looking for anything that might be of use. Nothing, aside from a few stones and sticks on the ground. With what seemed to be no other option, she grabbed what appeared to be the heaviest rock she could carry, and emerged from her hiding spot.

Gathering her courage, Y/N raised her hand and threw the rock as hard as she could at the monster’s head. “Hey! Get off him!” she yelled. The rock rather pathetically bounced off it’s head, but it did want what she wanted it to do. It switched its attention towards her. The sinking feeling of fear hit her once it locked eyes with her. She felt glued to the ground; unable to move.

“Get away from here!” the man shouted from underneath the creature. He had no idea where this girl had come from, but she didn’t know what she was getting herself into. Immediately, her safety became his priority. The creature stood up, eyes focused on the girl.

“What on Earth is that thing?!” Y/N cried out. Her heart was pounding, harder than she’d ever felt.

“It’s a Gumm-Gumm. Something far, far too complicated to explain at this current time. But you need to run now!”

Running in her mind was deemed the most impossible task to accomplish. There was also the concern she had for this man she’s only just now met. The Gumm-Gumm took advantage of her hesitance and sprinted towards her.

“No!” the man shouts out. He jumps up from the ground only to be knocked down by the pain in his side again. “Run! Run!” His cries are not reaching her.

At this point, the Gumm-Gumm is standing right in front of Y/N. It grabs her by the waist and yanks her up towards its face. She can hear the man’s shouts distantly, however they are drowned out by her thoughts. ‘I was right’ ‘This is it for me’ Her only regret was that all she thought bringing only pepper spray would be enough--wait.

Her pepper spray. The thing she’s been clutching this whole time.

Wasting not a second more, she raised her hand towards the Gumm-Gumm’s face and sprayed seemingly half of the bottle. The creature cried out in pain and immediately dropped her. She fell to the ground, taking the chance to back away. Getting his fifth wind of the night, the man got up on his feet and wasted no time, charged up a spell, and blasted the Gumm-Gumm. This caused the creature to turn to stone, actual stone, and immediately shattered into pieces identical to those already surrounding them.

Neither of them spoke for a solid minute; the only sounds coming from them being their breathing. Y/N was still trying to comprehend what just happened. She had the notion that she would be helping someone who was getting jumped, or assaulted, not helping someone kill a...Gumm-Gumm?

“Are..are you alright?” she asked. She walked closer to him. Upon further inspection, this man looked like he could be in his late teen years. He was also--very attractive.

“Don’t worry about me, are you okay? I apologize for not helping you. The fourth Gumm-Gumm rammed into my side and I-I just couldn’t get up-”

Y/N put a hand on his shoulder, “Hey-hey it’s okay. You did all you could. You still saved me from it.”

He gave her a small chuckle, “Actually, I think it’s you who saved me. If you hadn’t distracted him I would’ve been a goner.”

She smiled at him and said, “We saved each other.”

“Ha, yeah we did.”

They locked eyes with each other, seemingly entranced by each other’s charm. Then, everything from the past few moments caught up with Y/N. “I’m sorry, I’ve seemed to have forgotten the fact that I was almost just killed by a Gunn-Gunn-”

“Gumm-Gumm”

“Thank you, Gumm-Gumm, and you blasted it with some blue sparkly light-”

“Magic”

“...Did you just say magic?”

This made him laugh, wincing a little from the pain. “Right, I’m sure you have many questions, but trust me. The more you know about this the worse off you’ll be so be allow me to make this go away for you.” He raised his hands, apparently getting ready to do a spell.

“Wait! You can’t!” Y/N exclaimed. The past hour has made entirely no sense to her, but somehow she wanted to stay involved. It could’ve been insanity, or maybe she just really wanted to know more about him, find out how to help him. Either way, she needed to know.

“Why not?” he stopped, hands still in the air. Trust him, he didn’t want to put her to sleep and have her wake up in her room with all of this seemingly a dream either. She intrigued him. She seemed kind, a rare selflessness he hadn’t expected from someone who was just thrusted into peril and world-shattering threats with no warning whatsoever. Plus, she was very beautiful. But, someone like her deserves a normal life. Free from danger like what he and his friends have to face.

“Because..because you’re hurt! I can’t very well leave you by yourself. Please, at least let me bring you to my place. I’ll patch you up and then I’ll pretend this night never happened.” She extended her hand towards him.

Against all better judgement, against Merlin’s voice ringing in ear about how terrible of an idea this was, he thought, ‘why not’.

“You’re very persuasive, do you realize that?” he asked with a cheeky smirk.

“I did get a lot of A’s on my persuasive writing in high school,” she joked. Both of them laughed softly. He took her hand. Her hand was very soft compared to his rough and calloused hand. She didn’t seem to mind.

“I’m Y/N,” she said as she pulled his arm over her shoulders, moving her hand to support him at his side.

“Hisirdoux, but you can call me Douxie.”

“Lovely to meet you, Douxie,” she gave him a warm smile.

“Same to you, Y/N” he offered the same grin.

Together, they walked out of the forest, side by side. Little did they know that they would never be apart from each other after that night.

#douxie x reader #douxie imagine #douxie #tales of arcadia #trollhunters

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hadesgoddess · 3 years ago

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Ok so I havent even finished the background fic for my Teen Wolf s/i, but that's ok because this is my circus and I'm calling the shots!🤡

Anyway, gonna just dump this short fic here because I can't wait to write the hurt/comfort that will come after this angst!! if anyone knows teen wolf, this takes place in season 3!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lockers and closed doors blurred together as Rose flew down the hall. Even with supernatural speed lending strength to her legs, it still seemed like she was moving through quicksand.

Over the rush of her own breath, she could hear the terrified screams of the trapped teacher downstairs. She could feel the roar of two feral werewolves rattle the ribs in her chest. She could smell the acrid tang of blood dripping onto a cold concrete floor; Derek’s blood.

Dammit, Derek! Don’t tell me you went in there alone!

The force she used to throw the door leading down to the boiler room made it strike the wall so hard it rebounded almost immediately. Rose bore the injury without complaint; there were more important matters at hand. If not for her quick, cat-like reflexes, she knew she would have fallen straight down the stairs and landed in a broken heap at the bottom.

Scott caught her before that could happen and pressed his ear back against the door.

“He didn’t-” She gasped for breath. “Did he??”

Scott nodded, jaw tense with worry and Rose spit out a few choice curse words.

“Did he forget that they’re absolutely feral right now?”

“Of course not,” Scott growled. “I told him that he would kill them or get himself killed, and that’s when he said ‘That’s why I’m going in alone’.”

Rose stared at Scott in horror, unable to believe it. “He wouldn’t say that...” She whispered.

“He did.”

The cement wall was like ice against her hot skin, flushed with adrenaline and the power of the full moon, but she slumped back against it. Disbelief and dismay warred in her heart as it began to sink in.

He really doesn’t think he’s worth anything alive...? He doesn’t care... that he probably won’t come back out in one piece...

Her hands shook with the urge to shove Scott out of the way and wrench the door open, to leap through the door regardless of the danger and help. She stood on unsteady feet, snarling out a warning to the young werewolf.

“Scott-”

“Scott! The sun!” Isaac’s voice came ringing down the stairwell like a herald from heaven. “The sun’s coming up!”

They stared at each other in amazement; it was true, they could already feel the effects of the full moon weaning away. Tripping over each other, they flung the latch open and slipped inside.

“Derek!?” Rose hated how high and thready her voice sounded, like some over dramatic, fainting damsel. But dread twisted her heart like a vise, sending her thoughts into a panic. Every instinct in her cried out to find him.

Finally, in the back of the basement, they found him. Derek was practically haloed in the morning light, streaming underground from the low windows. It threw his every injury into abrupt relief. It was a horror show.

“What-” Rose, Scott, and Isaac, who finally caught up, came screeching to a halt. “What did you do?”

Derek’s eyes stared at them, glazed over and unseeing. He was sitting on his knees with Cora and Boyd on either side, both unconscious. For a horrible second, he didn’t respond, didn’t seem to even recognize them. Then-

“There’s a teacher... I’ll take care of her... Get them out of here...”

“Excuse me?” It only took a second for the heartbreak to turn to wild, hot anger. “You’re kidding right?” She turned to the boys beside her.

“Please, get them to the truck. Someone will be here soon, we need to go, but Derek is in no condition to help. I’ll get him out.” The teens were quick to move out of their way, sensing the change in the air. In seconds, they were alone.

“What... are you doing?” Derek snarled, getting enough energy to try to stand. “If you’re trying to undermine my own authority in my pack-” He cut off, stumbling forward, blood splattering across the floor from still open claw marks. Rose immediately moved forward to catch him, hefting his muscled mass up.

“News flash, Hale, I’m not in your fucking pack and neither is Scott,” She retorted. Moving carefully, she lifted his arm over her shoulder, trying to walk him back to the stairs. “Now just shut up until we get to the car.”

“I’m fine!” Derek shouted, pulling away.

“That’s obviously not true!” Rose yelled back, locking his wrist in a steel grip. “Why is it so hard for you to accept help?” Facing each other, Rose only came up to his chin, but she stared up with fiery determination. Hazel eyes stared back with just as much tenacity, dark brows furrowed low in confusion.

“Because I don’t need it! I don’t want it, ok?” He took a step forward, attempting to get her to move back. Rose stood her ground. The air quivered between them, charged with some unfathomable emotion.

To her utter embarrassment, she felt tears begin to well in her eyes. Her vision was filled with red lines, dripping blood that soaked through the soft forest green shirt Derek wore. It seemed like they were taking much too long to heal. Even when they did, she knew she would still see them on his skin, the invisible scars painted in her memory. She couldn’t stand the thought of him letting himself be hurt, just to punish himself.

“Why are you crying?” Of course, he would say something so bluntly.

“What am I supposed to do when someone I care about is trying to get himself killed?” Her voice was thick. Rose stretched trembling fingers out to trace his wounds, pain and heartbreak choking her at the sight of his torn flesh.

“Wait,” Derek swayed back and forth on his feet, trying to catch up. “I’m not trying to kill myself! I’m doing what’s necessary. I owe blood, Rose... I have so much blood on my hands.” Those same hands, scarred and worn, so warm and gentle despite it all, came up to touch her shoulders, and moved further up, feather-light on the skin of her neck, to cup her face.

“Derek,” Again, she hated how her voice broke! “There was absolutely no reason to come in here alone. Scott could have helped you hold them off until sunrise while Isaac held the door. If he had- if he had, then you wouldn’t be about to collapse out on me!”

Even as she spoke, Derek closed his eyes, struggling to remain standing. Involuntarily, he slumped forward, arms falling back to her shoulders. Cursing, Rose caught him once again. In this position, his forehead came to rest against hers.

She froze. A million thoughts ran through her head. Fear that he’d finally passed out, anxiety that he would push her away, affection for how sleepy and almost adorable he looked at this distance. But, he couldn’t know what he was doing.

He had just let two werewolves tear into him like some kind of sick christmas present. The entire pack had been up all night with the full moon, tracking them down. His mental, physical, and emotional state had taken a dive over a cliff; she would never let herself take advantage of that.

She startled when Derek spoke. “I can practically feel you thinking, del Bosque. I don’t suppose they’re thoughts about me?” All the fight was gone from his voice, leaving resigned defeat.

“Don’t be self-absorbed, Hale-” Rose scoffed, heat rising to her cheeks, but all thought ground to a halt when he looked back up at her.

“I’m not. I know,” he spoke with such certainty, her heart dropped. “I know, Rose.”

She squeezed her eyes shut against his words, praying this was a bad dream, that it would all be gone when she opened them. Instead, those damn hazel eyes still stared at her, the heat of his face was still so close to her own.

“So, you know,” Rose pushed the words out, knowing the only way out was to rip the band-aid off and move on with her life. But understanding it and wanting it were vastly different things. The stabbing pain in her heart switched back to anger, trying to save as much of it as she could. “Good for you. I’m glad you finally got a fucking clue.

He tilted his head, forehead still pressed to hers, a puzzled look in his eyes.

“Rose...” The way he whispered her name made her knees weak, but she had to hold strong!

“Derek... It’s ok... you don’t have to say anything, let’s just get you-” All the words flew away, chased from her mouth by the insistent press of his lips against hers. All brain function stopped, but instinct took over. She kissed back fervently, her dream becoming a reality and she dazedly wondered how much she could steal away with. How much sensation she would carry with her until she died from this moment right here.

Would she remember how his skin was blazingly hot on hers, his fingers dancing up and down her neck, tilting her face in just the perfect way to slot their mouths together?

Or how he kissed her like he never wanted to stop, like a parched man in a desert oasis, drinking up all her gasps and moans like it was an illusion about to slip through his fingers?

When they finally broke to drag in deep, shuddering breaths, Rose’s mind was tossed and tumbled like a spare sock in the dryer. She could hardly tell up from down. Could anyone blame her? Her entire world had just been turned on its head!

“Rose...” Again, he sighed her name against her cheek, seemingly unwilling to be separated from her. She closed her eyes, struggling to process everything and also wanting to remain in the moment forever.

A metallic clang behind them broke her reverie.

Oh shit!

They had to go! Hopefully, there would be time to speak with Derek when they got back to the loft, but they could not be found here.

“Come on,” Rose wrapped his arm around her shoulder once more and moved ahead. “Get a move on, you ridiculous, idiotic, fucking sweet man.” Thankfully, Derek finally seemed too tired to resist.

Together, they climbed the steps up into the light of the dawn.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Getting back to the loft proved much harder than expected.

By the time Rose managed to lug Derek's heavy butt out the school, red and blue lights flashed all around them. Where was Stiles and his blue jeep when they needed him?

Evading the cops involved quite a lot of crouching in the dawn shadows behind dumpsters and brick walls, praying the police would run right past.

Luckily, the teacher who had been in the basement took a lot of their attention. While she gestured and ranted, Rose and Derek finally slunk past the last cop car and stumbled into the safety of the woods. From there, it was a slow journey to the back parking lot where Rose had left their car. Somewhere along the way, Derek finally passed out.

With shaky hands, she deposited Derek's still form into the passenger seat and buckled him in. It took all her control to not speed through downtown and blow every red light on the way there. The last thing she wanted right now was more cops.

Isaac and Scott were waiting in the parking lot when they pulled in. She wasn't ashamed to take Scott's steady arm and hobble inside while Isaac hefted Derek up after them.

Not everyone could take every hit and stay standing like Derek tried to.

It was a long day, waiting for Derek's body to heal and wake up. The boys had to leave for school, but insisted Rose call them if they needed anything. Derek might be holding people at arm's length, but those people refused to do the same. Exhausted, but feeling better with a cup of coffee in her hands, Rose promised they would be the first to hear anything.

Then she was alone. At first, she spent a few hours sitting at Derek's side, unwilling to leave for anything. But basic biological functions demanded she get up and shower and use the restroom. Since Derek hadn't even twitched all morning, she assumed it would be ok, just for a few minutes.

It felt weird using someone else's shower, especially when the owner was comatose just yards away so she washed as fast as possible. Unfortunately, since this whole venture was a tad unexpected, Rose had nothing to change into.

Nose wrinkling over the dirt encrusted jeans and ragged shirt, she had a short internal debate before huffing.

It's just a shirt and a pair of pants, del Bosque! Besides, if he has any complaints, he can tell them to my fist. It's what he gets for scaring the shit out of me last night.

Mind made up, she rifled through Derek's bottom drawer, knowing from years of sleepover experience that he kept his work-out clothes in there. She picked the biggest shirt she could find and felt a tiny hint of satisfaction for nabbing a ridiculously comfortable pair of sweatpants.

Emerging from the bathroom, feeling a tiny bit better, she returned to her station at Derek's bedside. The coffee had turned cold by now, but she didn't refill it. More caffeine would only give her jitters at this point. In fact, she found it difficult to settle down. Her legs itched to pace, to run through the woods like she had in South America when the pressure of her clan got overwhelming. But she couldn't just leave Derek. She wasn't even aware of the passage of time, only the too slow rise and fall of his chest.

At some point, she got the strength to stand up and collect some supplies. It wasn't exactly necessary since a were-creature would heal exponentially faster than a human, but it felt good to do something. Plus, she wanted Derek to be taken care of. Who knew when he had last let someone do that?

Blood was blotted up, gashes were bound, and she even managed to get him coherent enough to drink a few swallows of water. Then it was back to the waiting game. With cloth bandages covering his wounds, Rose couldn't tell how fast he was healing. But if the coolness of his skin was any indicator, she had protected him from any infection and now the heavy lifting was up to Derek.

Late evening light cast through the multitude of windows of his loft when he finally stirred.

"......Where- where am I?" His groan brought Rose back to the present. For the last hour or so, she had been nodding off, the lack of sleep finally catching up. At some point, Rose wasn’t sure when or how exactly, their hands had drifted together and were now entwined.

Derek held their clasped hands up, looking at Rose in confusion. “What happened? How did we get back here?”

“You- what do you remember?” Rose asked.

“We lured them to the school... We were down in the boiler room... there was a teacher trapped down there, right?” As he worked it out, he tried to sit up. He didn’t get very far before falling back against the pillows with a pained moan.

“Yeah, that’s what happens when you try to take 2 feral werewolves by yourself, Hale.” Rose snapped, jumping up to check his wounds. Satisfied none of them had re-opened, she went and got him a fresh cup of water. When he finished it, she sat back down at his side. “Do you remember the rest?”

She knew she should let it go, just let Derek focus on healing. But, she had to be sure that she hadn’t just imagined what Derek said, what Derek did down there. Her lips tingled and she bit down on the lower one hard to put a stop to it.

“I-I don’t think so,” Derek gazed off into the distance, trying to remember. “After the first couple of claws in my chest, I think I just shut down. Just tried to take the pain.”

She couldn’t believe it. “You’re sure? Nothing else?”

His eyes landed on hers, sure and steady.

“...No. Nothing else.”

Well. That was that. It was going to be brushed off as a mistake, fueled by delirious pain and the intoxicating effects of the full moon. Rose put her head in her hands.

“Rose?”

She shook her head, not looking up. Just a minute, she needed just a minute to force back the tears and regain some equilibrium. Luckily, Rose was an expert at boxing up inconvenient emotions and unpacking them later.

“...Are those my clothes?” Rose groaned shortly, regretting her earlier decision.

“Well I didn’t exactly pack a suitcase when we set off the other night!” She couldn’t sit here any longer, pretending everything was perfectly fine. She leapt from her seat like she was on fire and headed back t0 the kitchen.

“Wait-!”

“Don’t worry, I’ll leave them where I found them before I leave.” She didn’t need to look back to know he was staring at her. All she wanted to do was turn right back around and hold Derek close. But now she knew, that wouldn’t be a privilege she would ever earn.

“Rose, it’s fine, but-” Finally, she turned, one hand on the doorknob. From where he laid in bed, he looked strikingly lost. Like a boat lost at sea and she was a distant lighthouse. The thought made her heart drop, but she squashed the feeling down. “Are you mad? Was it something I did? I know we should have been more careful at the school, but we had no idea the teacher would be there.”

“.......It’s always about someone else, isn’t it?” Her statement only confused him more, she could tell. But she didn’t have the strength to finish this conversation. Her heart hurt too much from the emotional roller coaster this man had just taken her on and she needed time to clear her head.

“Just forget it, Derek. You’re great at that apparently.” Rose threw over her shoulder as she left the room, not brave enough to see his face when she said it.

The door clicked shut, two confused and hurt people on either side.

#ship: to build a home #listen my only goal rn is rewriting this season because its fucking ridiculous how badly derek gets treated #i wanna punch that jennifer bitch in the throat #no heads up either just gonna karate chop her head off #self insert fanfiction #s/i #f/o #self insert community #my writing #teen wolf s/i

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sunarintoes · 4 years ago

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Dear Whoever: [Oikawa]

Synopsis: two broken strangers hold a mutual understanding of each other as they silently complete jigsaw puzzles together every Wednesday afternoon.

WC: 4K

TW: mental health issues, reader sucks at math, swearing, angst (but a lot of fluff) please do not read if you feel uncomfortable by these themes. Also: this fic has nothing to do with volleyball and is set in a clinic for mental health

Note: this is in no way meant to romanticise mental health issues, it is simply a story of a person (reader) who is struggling with their mental health and eventually gets better through the silent support of a friend she makes (Oikawa)

18/6/2020

Dear diary?

Is that how I'm supposed to start these entries off? I'm not sure. Well, uh...today I went to see a psychologist for the first time. Her name is Mary and she gave me this book, told me to try it out and write in it as much as possible. I feel awkward though. I don't think I'll use this.

Until next time,

30/6/2020

So uh… hi?

My therapist told me to write here even if I'm not sad? So if something memorable happens. I don't know honestly. This is way too awkward. Maybe I'll get used to this. Maybe not?

Cya,

18/7/2020

I stayed true to my words, I really haven't written here that much. I'm doing good and I don't think there's anything wrong with me! I'm not sure why I'm being forced to go to therapy. I feel how I feel and it doesn't matter! I know there are people worse off than me and I don’t have the right to feel sad - I have a good family, good friends, go to a nice school and I have money (or well, my parents do). So why should I feel sad? And I just have a resting bitch face. It's not called being ‘depressed’ or whatever.

Asides from all that, the only reason I haven't kicked up a huge fuss about being forced to be interrogated is the fact that every Wednesday - the day I visit my psychologist, there's always the same cute boy sitting in the same seat opposite me, not to mention the same somber expression he wears.

I'm not sure why, but I feel oddly connected to him. As if our minds are connected and in tune. I feel like I know him and he knows me. I've been reading too many books. Lol! There's no way we have that connection. Besides, I've only seen him about 4 times. Yeah, I'm definitely making this up in my sad, lonesome head.

Farewell for now,

21/7/2020

Dear diary,

I saw him again. I still don't know his name. But today he looked up at me and smiled a bit, I tried to smile back but I probably just looked angry. Not that I have a problem smiling or that I'm angry or upset. I'm just stuck on default - stuck with a heavy frown on my face.

Sincerely

29/7/2020

It's a shame, really; I've spent so long trying so hard to get better. And I do want to get better, but it’s not easy. If I'm being honest, I thought I was getting better but when the quarantine hit I began to bottle things up again. Not seeing my feelings, having them buried deep beneath - locked away in the deepest pits of my heart… well, it was soothing in a sense. That way they did not exist, they were forgotten. I didn't have to deal with them. But I forgot the most important thing of all, ‘with good comes bad’ they say, I wish I had listened - to myself and to those around me, that bottling up feelings is really the worst thing to do. Because the longer you ignore them, the stronger they grow and the darker they get. I'm an idiot; really. I was a coward, too scared of my untamed, ugly feelings to face them head on, too scared to ask for support to help me face them. So here I am now, wallowing in the depths of my despair with an increasingly depressing inner monologue, typing this out in tune with it. I'm really bashing myself up, bottling up is the most harmful way to inflict violence upon one’s self, and I'm really feeling it. My brain hurts from narrating my problems and inner thoughts - it’s working overtime as a sort of coping mechanism. But what hurts the most - what burns the most, is my ever dry throat and teary eyes. Having to swallow the ever present lump that happens to make itself comfortable right at the back of my throat seems to really suck the moisture out of my mouth, hence my dry throat. My eyes really sting, the tears come and go, and boy, let me tell you - it takes so much strength to fight them. To stop them from rolling down as they would wish to. Feeling the tears well up and then forced to go away really burns. I'm not sure why; I do know that despite not having cried even once, my eyes burn as if I havent stopped crying since last week.

As dramatic as this is, this is how I feel. Quite underwhelming considering I've been harboring such strong, hating and dangerous feelings to myself since march. Though, this is my first time letting these frustrations out. I'm glad I've finally realised the burdens I carry. There's not much I can do.

See you next time,

2/8/2020

Hi,

Didn't expect to write that much in here but shit has been going down this week. Today my math teacher kept me in to tell me that I failed my math test, she told me that it was irresponsible of me to get as low as I got. The whole time she scolded me, I felt uncomfortable and like I could cry - I was close too, the tears were forming in my eyes. She asked me if I was planning on dropping maths, she basically suggested for me to drop maths. Oh! She also told me that I had to stop drawing in my book and that it was preventing me from learning because apparently ‘if you draw that just proves to me that you have no idea what's going on and you don't want to ask questions.’ and I'll give her that, I don’t - to both things.

The seats are so close it makes me anxious, I don't want everyone around me to know that I don't understand math! And besides, I seriously do not understand it so she'd have to sit with me the entire lesson to explain everything… I think there's something wrong with me.

Until next time,

3/8/2020

Hey, me again.

It’s still slightly weird to vent into a little diary but I'm getting there I guess. I'm so frustrated! Today has been the worst fucking day that I've ever experienced. For starters, I did double math for periods one and two, and then we got our tests back and I failed :) yep 23%!

I'm just soooo happy. If I'm being honest I don't care anymore. Maths is hard and no matter how much I study I fail at it. There's no point in me even trying now. I give up. What's worse is we had a substitute teacher and when she handed out the papers she gave my paper to some other girl in the class - who then of course, proceeded to have a fit about how bad the test is and that the tests were definitely mixed up. Well, they were but did she really have to explain to the whole class about how bad the score is? It was embarrassing to have to put my hand up and get the paper - my test, handed to me. It felt like everyone’s eyes were burning holes into my body. Right then and there I had a panic attack - I had already felt on edge since yesterday but the test conforming results plus the fact that everyone knew how badly I scored tipped me over the edge. I felt the tears well up but I pushed them back - refusing to show everyone how weak and pathetic I am.

I excused myself to the bathroom and cried a little before texting my friends and telling them that I was about to have a meltdown. Unfortunately they weren't online and didn't respond, I had to go back to class anyway.

When the break came, I left to go back to the bathroom - my tears were still clouding my vision and I couldn't get rid of them. I think I may be superstitious but while I was walking I was stuck behind the girls who saw my test - they were talking about their tests. I didn't really care but then one of them said ‘how much do you need to pass?’ and the others just laughed, so she continued and said ‘seriously! Is 24 percent a pass?’ this made the other girls laugh even harder, it felt like a slap to the face. Like they were indirectly mocking me. The same girl then said ‘surely 25 percent’ which again, was met with laughter.

It really hurt. Even if I was just overreacting. Surely not. They had to be talking about me. Why else would they talk about low test grades when they are literally on to top of the class.

I just want to disappear.

Sincerely,

8/8/2020

I dropped my Ipad today - twice if I may add. I cried when it hit the floor, the protective screen shattering into small, sharp pieces. The ‘up’ volume button is stuck and can no longer be used, neither can the ‘on/off’ button. Guess I can only use the home button to turn it on and wait for it to go to sleep if I don't want to use it. I'm kinda fed up with life. I want to be taken away. I don't care how far I go. I just want to leave.

Not soKindly,

14/8/2020

Dear Diary,

Today has been alright, I made mini cookies which helped put a smile on my face. Ever since the first time I exploded in this diary, I've felt a humongous weight lift off of my shoulders. Picture this, a single person holding up 50 tonnes of bricks and then telling themself and everyone around them ‘I’m fine! I can do this! I don't need help!’ but then one day, the person feels even more bricks pile up which becomes overloaded and they can't keep it up anymore. So they begin to crumble under all the pressure and the weight until they just explode! After their explosion a new person appears out of nowhere and helps them hold the stack of bricks. It is not that lighter, but it's the extra support - the extra pair of hands helping keep the first person stand straight, that really means something. I'm not sure if that makes sense but it’s how I can describe how I feel. Still feels heavy in my chest, but this time it just feels a bit lighter - like the world isn't entirely against me.

From,

30/8/2020

Dear Diary

When I went to the clinic earlier this week, something unexpected happened. The cute boy - who i like to call my ‘Therapy Buddy’ pointed over to the small table where a bunch of unfinished puzzles lay. I was confused at first but still walked over there. We sat down opposite each other and offered small smiles to one another. And without saying anything we finished off the jigsaw puzzles until we had to part ways.

For the first time in a while, I felt calm - as if my nerves were soothed. Maybe I should upgrade his name to ‘Miracle Buddy’ because I am 100% sure the reason I felt at peace was his doing - his presence.

Until next time,

7/9/2020

Dear Diary,

Therapy Buddy and I completed the jigsaw puzzles again today; no words were exchanged. I think he’s cute. I don't have a crush on him. I literally don't know him. I just like being in his presence. And besides, we've only done this twice. Who's to say we'll do it next week?

Cya,

15/9/2020

Whats up bitch Diary

Haha. Therapy Buddy is definitely smart. He was so quick to complete a 200 piece puzzle! I barely helped… he's cute when he concentrates as well. Oh yeah, we did end up doing them today. I noticed he also carries a diary with him. Maybe he writes in it like I do? Who knows. I hope he's written about me… I mean he probably hasn't but who knows, am I right?

Sincerely

21/9/2020

Hey Diary,

I'm really struggling going to school, I find it hard to concentrate in math class. Actually yeah, I like going to school but it's when I step into the math class, when I go in I feel my chest tighten and my throat dry. I have spoken with my parents a lot. They said I can drop maths if I want to. I'm still not sure what I want to do in the future but I have a faint idea: a psychologist or an artist. I need maths for psychology I think. I'm not sure. I think I'll just stick with it and hope next year goes better.

From,

29/9/2020

I look forward to going to the clinic. It no longer feels like an interrogation now that I walk in with an open mind. I'm still not getting much better with maths so I asked to be dropped down a level and now that i'm in a new classroom, a new environment, i feel less nervous. Maybe i’ll be able to get at least something done.

Kindly,

12/10/2020

This is a disaster, the other week when Therapy Buddy and I were sitting together - in comfortable silence might I add, we mixed our diaries! I can't believe this. I didn't realise until I got home! I had no ways of contacting him either. I hope he didn't read through it. If he did, I'm in trouble, I'm not doing good. I feel sick in my stomach and my throat is constricting. Ok I'm going to go, I'm having a panic attack just remembering.

Until next time

13/10/2020

Hey Diary!

In the midst of panic yesterday, I missed an important detail. Therapy Buddy left his name and phone number in my book. He must have opened up to write in it only to realise it wasn't his book. I hope. I'm a bit scared to text him. He has a pretty name - Oikawa Toru.

If I'm going to be honest, I read a little of his diary! I couldn't help it, I just wanted to write my feelings but I opened up on his latest entry, I read it and I shouldn't have. I feel a bit guilty but now, more than ever, I feel closer to him. He's feeling a similar way to me.

Yeah, I think I'll go for it. I think I'll text him.

Sincerely,

20/10/2020

What's up Diary!?

I'm glad I texted Toru! Since then we've been texting non stop but we've made a promise - to not speak to each other in person until we’re both doing better. That's fine with me. I just know my voice would betray me if I decided to chat him up in person. I've found a sense of comfort with Toru, he's no longer just my Therapy Buddy (although that's his contact name), he's now my friend who I can seek comfort in, and he seeks comfort in me too. I hate to say it, but I think I may have a small crush on him. This is a pain in the ass, I really hope I don't. He's just my friend. He's just my friend. He's just my friend. He's just my friend. But he’s really cute

Kind regards,

25/10/2020

Hey diary,

I'm feeling a lot mentally better, I wish I had realised sooner that going to therapy was helpful. Having someone who just listens to you and doesn't give their input unless you want it is soothing. I'm not as anxious to go to math class, of course I'm still trying but I've adopted the mindset: what's done is done, all I can do is look forward.

I have good news about Toru. Today he said to me ‘when I’m ready I want to love you and for you to love me.’ I know I don’t love him but I’m not an idiot, I know I have some more-than-friends feelings towards him.

From,

27/11/2020

Dear Diary,

Things have been really looking up for me. Im feeling a lot happier and the weight in my chest is a lot lighter. I almost feel free. I've been thinking of career paths a lot lately. I think I want to be a psychologist. If it weren't for Mary, who knows where I would be now. Thanks to her I've been able to feel better and do better. I want to be like her. I want to be able to help people through their problems - whether it be a minor inconvenience or a major one, because I know how it feels. I understand what it feels like to have the whole world against you - as if every force and person in the universe were working unanimously together to bring me down, ‘but I survived and so can you.’ That's what I will tell them. And also ‘We can get through this together,’ and let's not forget ‘this will be challenging so we both have to put in 100 percent to getting better!’

Sincerely

12/12/2020

Hey diary,

I am full of joy.

Today Toru texted me and asked me if i wanted to spend New Years Eve with him! I said yes and were going to go to the park to have a picnic and watch the fireworks! I'm so excited. I hope he is too! I just cannot wait.

Oh yeah! I can't believe i haven't written it in until now! I've just been so happy and excited and wow but the two of us went out to a cafe and he bought me a drink - we still haven't exchanged words and spent the whole time sitting next together while texting.

In that moment I felt so happy, I knew that this is the guy I want to be with. I have a crush on him and wow... I it feels good to get that off my chest and out into the open,,, I wonder if he’s ready? It doesn’t matter, I’ll wait as long as I have to because Toru is special and I don’t want to lose him.

It is New Years Eve and I have made plans to catch up with Toru, he's going to pick me up at my house and together we’ll walk to the nature park where we’ll spend the night having a picnic and being in each other’s presence. In my small bag I have snacks and drinks packed, along with some board games - why not? After all, I'm planning on confessing to him tonight and I thought doing it while engaging in one of the things that brought us together was the way to go.

There is a timid knock on the door and I quickly run to answer it.

As soon as I open the door I’m met with a cardboard poster with the words ‘Happy New Years Eve, Yn!!’ written in big, large letters. I smile as I look at it, Toru definitely was not an artistic person but the thought was sweet and made my heart swell. I pull out my phone and text him a thank you before receiving one back from him; ‘you look extra beautiful… Yn.’

I read the text a few times before my brain finally gets the message, a large smile creeps up onto my face and I hear him try to stifle a laugh.

I turn away from Toru and yell out ‘bye bye! I'll see you tonight!!’

When I turn back I see Toru reaching out his hand; as if he were asking me to hold it.

Toru’s hand is pretty, our fingers are linked together and they rest comfortably. Nothing feels forced, it all feels natural. I look up at him and wonder if he feels the same, as if he knew what I was thinking when he squeezes my hand. Yeah, we definitely have some strange connection.

We spend the whole journey to the park texting, and as much as I love texting him and hearing him quietly chuckle during conversations it no longer feels like enough. I want more. As greedy and selfish as that sounds. I know I said I would wait for him - as long as it would take, but I'm getting impatient. Tonight i'm going to speak to him… I hope he does as well.

The park is beautiful, the flowers are trees surrounding the border and trap out the outside world. It almost feels like I'm in a magical fairy realm - or something like that.

We found a spot near a garden bed and I noticed the arrangement of flowers fairly quickly. I find it funny, the flowers almost represent everything i feel for Toru - maybe our meeting was indeed, fate and maybe this was fate telling me to confess.

I pull out a 5000 piece jigsaw and text ‘wanna play?’ which Toru of course agrees.

I have had fun, all night we’ve spent playing various games and eating snacks. We still haven't spoken and that's getting me down. I can't help the intrusive thoughts - ‘does he not like me?’ ‘he's not ready’ ‘you're just a friend.’ I try to push them out of my head but before I crumble I find a new thought: ‘maybe he's just too shy to make the first move.’

That is, it was up to me and it was the perfect time to confess - ten minutes until the new year. I quickly got up and made an impromptu bouquet of the flowers that resided next to us.

Shaking, I turned towards him. “Hey… i’m Ln Yn and this is for you…” I handed him the bouquet and tried my best to ignore the look on his face - I couldn't tell if it was shock out of happiness or anger, “you asked to know the meanings right?” I move closer to him and point out a flower, “well, see that flower? It's a light purple lilac that resembles young love… and this one here, it's called a belledonne which means silence, this one’s a begonia - representing dark thoughts, oh and this one! It's a pink camellia which symbolises longing - particularly longing for a romantic relationship with the receiver, and this daisy right here means innocence and hope. And lastly, the hibiscus represents delicate beauty.’ I swallowed a lump in my throat as I looked up at him, I didn't realise how close I got to him - our lips were mere centimeters away.

‘Hey… I'm Oikawa Toru and I like you too. Why don't we give a relationship a try?’

I smile. I smile so large I feel my cheeks hurt. This, this is the happiest i've ever been. ‘I’d like that.’ Toru smiles with me, he’s beautiful, even with the dak thoughts plaguing his mind.

‘I like your voice’ we say to each other before laughing.

‘Wow.. we really said that at the same time huh?’ he laughs. Instead of responding I grab a hold of his hand once more and squeeze it. ‘It’s kinda annoying, I wanted to confess first…’

‘Not my fault. Bet it wouldn't have been as romantic as what I did.’

‘So telling me the meanings of flowers is romantic?’

I gasp as he doubles over in laughter and without realising we fell into an easy conversation - much like one we would have over text. Everything with Toru felt natural.

The fireworks go off signalling the beginning of the new year, Toru leans in closer and his eyes don't leave mine.

‘Hey,’ he says softly, ‘can I kiss you?’ I gulp and nod, within seconds his lips were delicately pressed against mine, they were soft and smooth - even if they were slightly chapped. They felt natural against my lips. The kiss was short and sweet. Deciding that it wasn't enough to satisfy me, I went back in after we pulled apart and we both smiled into the kiss - our lips passionately moving together, like two jigsaw pieces that were made for each other.

When we pull back, Toru drags me into his chest and says, ‘I'm ready to love you.’

Taglist: @ladyrenart

Hushudhidwhuwihahuaf ïm im sorry this is horrible and I definitely don’t plan on using this style of writing anytime soon! I promise the rest of the series will be written nicely !

#haikyuu #haikyu #haikyuu x reader #fluff #x reader #angst #oikawa #oikawa toru #oikawa x reader #oikawa fluff #oikawa angst

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cockbiteproductions · 4 years ago

Note

all prime numbers in the Misc section and all multiples of 10 in the other sections

we shall go backwards as the question list was posted backwards...... (and also why i rbed it.... why is it backwards? i dont know but i love it. edit: now that ive seen question 1 it looks to me like one of those forum profile copy pastes where you fill out the entire thing and put it in your profile.)

200: My crush’s name is: hmm...... well. i would rather not say!!!! they could see this post!!!!!!! and we do not want that happening.......

190: My 1st job was: lifeguard in the summer after 9th or 10th grade i think? it was decently fun. i grew up swimming competitively so the swimming part was a breeze. the remembering what to do if someone is drowning part? a bit harder. memory bad. what to do if someone has a potential broken spine/head injury when they’re in deep water? i don’t know bud. but it involves 3 whole people to get them out. 2 in the water, one person at all times holding their head in line with the rest of their body, the other one strapping them to the board (these two people in the water switch off, too) and then one person standing on the side of the pool looking very concerned. also don’t tell anyone but sometimes if i had like a 6 am shift i would get really groggy and almost fall asleep on the stand.

180: Marriage is: whatever people make of it but unfortunately bogged down with like a lot of societal expectations. to me it just sounds like hanging with your “best” friend until you die but a lot of other people interpret it differently.

170: What did you do yesterday? LOL wouldn’t it be nice if i remembered. wait no i do remember. i woke up “early” and watched a dnd livestream and struggled through buffering from my shit wifi. then i took a nap. then i had a chipotle burrito that was way too spicy. and i played a lot of minecraft. and i wrote a bit. and i also did like another 2-3 pages of the codecademy html intro course im working on.

160: Soul mates: nope. [taylor mason voice] i don’t believe in the concept of a soul. you are compatible with some people more than others and that’s based on your values and interests and personality. nothing Soul about it. it’s fun in fanfic and fiction though, but that’s because it’s fiction.

150: Blondes or Brunettes: brunettes..... i like brown hair! but blonde is nice too.

140: Mac or PC: clown face emoji. mac. It’s A Unix System. more convenient for me. my current mac is a giant piece of shit though. though i think that’s my own fault for keeping all my old files from my old mac. shoulda started over. i think i might try to get this one factory reset or something.

130: Wal-Mart or Target: idk walmart. i go there a lot during college. walmart just has a larger selection. i used to go to target a lot as a kid though because my mom liked it more. i think it’s like slightly more bougie?

120: Gay Marriage: fuckin go for it pals. sad that it took as long as it did to become legal.

110: My Neighbors: they are nice i think. the ones to the right are teachers or something. the ones to the left are.... idk. their kids were like maybe 5 years older than me and my brother when we were growing up though and sometimes they would indulge in us tiny annoying kids and hang with us

100: Cried in front of someone: when the finale of the clone wars came out a few months ago and i was sobbing and i ran into the living room to tell my roommate and friend that i was sobbing. i was sobbing. i also recorded myself watching the entire eps and i Sure Was Sobbing.

90: Texted: actual sms text, yesterday in response to a friend who texted me a tik tok. instant messaging like 20 minutes ago to milo. i havent responded yet because im answering this and i cant multitask for shit.

89: Who makes you laugh the most: me obviously. i think i’m fucking hilarious. me aside, @redvsblue is the funniest person on this planet. also my friend holly irl who shares my incredibly dumb sense of humor. also you!

83: The most difficult thing to do is: hmm........ in general or for me personally? idk..... a lot? i am not a very courageous person. so i guess being brave.

79: First time you had a crush: >:( not appreciating this line of questioning that lines up with the prime numbers/mult of 10. i will not be saying as they ALSO follow me on tumblr. though they don’t use it often. shout out to middle school.......

73: Tomorrow: hopefully wake up around 1 pm at the latest. make a plum smoothie. play some more minecraft and get more netherite (new update slaps). do more coding tutorials. get some writing done. the same ol same ol.

71: Next Summer: hopefully i will have a job lined up for the fall and the pandemic is Over. i would like to just [do nothing] for the last summer Ever before job starts. if i don’t have a job then it’s Job Hunting Time.

67: The person that makes me cry the most is: what the fuck...... like in a bad way? good way? cry of laughter? sadness? me, probably. my own damn brain be like “well it’s time to think about Yourself and be sad!” i know. very narcissistic of me. also dave filoni (director, producer, writer on clone wars).

61: My Car: not really mine. i just use it. beige 201? toyota camery. my brother tried to convince my dad he needed it more than i did last school year. my brother, who lived on campus in boston and flies to school from nc when he goes there, needs the car more than me, who lived off campus and drove to and from school to get back to nc, thinks he needed the car more than me. what a guy.

59: The movie I cried at was: last movie huh......... when was the last time i saw a movie? idk probably the rise of skywalker when leia died. i don’t know. i sure as hell didn’t cry at cats.

53: How do you like your steak cooked: i am vegetarian.

47: Who’s your best friend: @worthyghouls i guess. but also concept of “best friend” is so weird. No Best Friends. just lots of people i am good friends with. feels weird to all my other friends to pick One of them and be like “well i like you more than everyone else” :)

43: Do you have a 5 year plan: only in the vaguest vaguest vaguest sense. i would like to graduate with my bs degree. i would like to live in a city (doesn’t have to be a super big one. where im at rn is fine). i would like to have my first or second job i feel comfortable doing related to the degree i am getting. i would like to live in my own apartment (with roommates)/not with my parents. i would like to not be rent burdened. i would like my roommate to know how to take care of a cat or be okay with helping me learn how to take care of one. i would like to have a cat with said roommate. and that’s about it tbh. not very ambitious, i know. i just want a simple life......

41: Have you pre-named your children: bold of you to assume i will have children. no. if i ended up with child it would be like that tag on ao3 called “accidental baby acquisition” and i would name it on the spot.

30: Actress: hmm..... lauren marcus. lauren lopez. does fiona nova count if she’s going to be in rvb zero? also lindsay jones. aubrey plaza. idk. not many actresses i follow from project to project. it’s more i will see them in something and appreciate them in that role immensely.

20: Holiday: halloween is pretty chill. just getting candy from strangers? dope. scary aesthetic? amazing. i also like christmas just for the sole fact that i get time off from [life].

10: Restaurant: a favorite restaurant??? who has one of those???? i sure don’t. and i’m not gonna say something cringey like olive garden or mcdonalds. i simply do not have one.

#not rt #teresa answers stuff #tyty for sending in #soph with the primes as always...#nothingunrealistic1

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keenge · 5 years ago

Text

I was holding her in my arms when the phone rang ... "It's 3:30 in the fucking morning this had better be important !!!" I said losing the dream. " Mat, it's T and I really do hate to bother you, but I think he is back," said my partner and best friend Theresa McCawley , " Beat patrol found her body about 30 minutes ago, down by the docks." " I'll be there in 15 minutes Teri. " and I hung up, got dressed and locked my door and left the house. My name is Mathias MacGregor and I have been a cop in Riverside, La. most of my adult life, was born and raised there, and the man my partner was referring to is known as the Dock Master ... this is our story.

It all started when a young girl, 16, was found beaten raped, brutally tortured and murdered on the East dock 8 years ago. Since then he has left 12 more bodies and so many unanswered questions it makes me sick. He had a calling card, my initials carved into the victims foreheads, a detail the press miraculously has never found out about.

It's been a year since he struck the last time, a year since he put a bullet into my chest and I put one into his leg and back, a year filled with pain rehab and booze and me tracking the few clues he has left behind.

The second victim was found less than a week after the first and it was the pathologist that mentioned the letters ... my name isn't well known outside the department and certainly not my middle initial, so it was obvious that a message was being sent since a letter arrived for me at the lab while we were waiting for the autopsy report.

She had been beaten and raped like the first girl but the torture was different, not by much, but enough to see the bastard knew what he was doing and was good at it, a beat cop brought me the letter having signed for it from a courier. Inside was my full name a description of both victims including marks left by the torture and one sentence, "These are only the beginning."

That was 8 years and 10 victims ago, but god it feels like a lifetime. I got close a year ago because he made one mistake, just one but it was enough to trap him. We just weren't prepared for the fight he put up, 2 officers dead, 3 more including myself wounded and a shit ton of publicity asking why we havent caught him. " Mat, the call went out on a cell and came straight to me, they know the rules." This is why I adore my partner and best friend, Teri can read me like a book.

There had been calls made over the radios for the first 4 victims but, after the 3rd and 4th had my initials on their foreheads as well as the first 2, we decided anymore would go out over special phones we had made for our department.

Don't get me wrong I don't hate the press, I just don't have much use for them to be honest. They twist words and actions and typically report only what they want.

After the first 4 victims they were already calling him the Dock Master, even though we had begged them not to, we had learned from other cities giving a serial killer a name tends to make them bolder and more ... violent.

"Do we have an I.D. on her yet?" I asked of nobody in particular, "No lieutenant, but she doesn't look like a typical street kid." I walked over knelt down and pulled the sheet back from her face, OH MOTHERFUCKER" I yelled, making everyone jump and turn towards me, " This is Mayor Thompson's daughter!!!" Teri looked at me with wide eyes and for the first time since the shooting last year I saw fear in her face.

Every single cop in Riverside knew Jesse Thompson, she was the city's darling because she was pretty and had a voice like an angel.

"Are you sure Mat" Teri asked in a hoarse whisper, "She is supposed to be in Chicago for the Cheerleading competition." "Yeah, I'm sure T, he didnt damage her face, except to leave his mark" I said, "I'll make the notification myself and meet you at the lab."

When I got to the lab I had a grim sense of satisfaction tempered with a pity I never thought I'd ever feel for the man i was sure was the biggest crook in our small part of the world. After the shooting, our esteemed Mayor, in his infinite wisdom, took to the press (see above opinions) and made us seem like the Keystone Kops.

I was personally accused of mishandling the evidence and the investigation and causing the deaths and injuries of my friends and comrades.

"Doc says it will be tomorrow before her report is ready Mat, go home and get some sleep for what it's worth, I'll go to the office then head home myself" said Teri when I walked through the doors. "Come by the house when your done at the office if you want T, we could both use some stress relief about now" I said with a sad smile. " You still have your key, I'll be in the shower and you can join of you want." She smirked hugged me and whispered " Only if you promise to be a little rough" and walked away towards the exit.

Teri and I have known each other for 25 yrs and it wasn't until 3 yrs ago that either of us ever really thought about being anything but friends, as strange as that sounds, we were both either with someone or only one of us was single or whatever the case may be but it took that long, but damn it was worth the wait.

When she got to my house I was in the shower as promised, as she came into the bathroom I could tell she had been crying, so I stood under the water waiting for her to decide what she was going to do, as she stepped in I grabbed her, pushed her against the wall, and fell to my knees in front of her, grabbed her thighs and pushed them apart.

I slid my tongue into her wet slit, flicking her clit, as I grabbed her breasts with my hands and played with her nipples. "OH MY GOD YES" she yelled, as I gently sucked her clit into my mouth, and rubbed it between my upper and lower teeth, as she came she grabbed my hair pulling me up and said "FUCK ME NOW"

As we were in the tub she shoved me down, grabbed me in her hand and squeezed, as she stroked slowly smiling at me, then swung her leg over and lowered herself onto my face, allowing me to find her clit and lips with my tongue, as she took me in her mouth, and slowly licked and sucked up and down my manhood, while I was licking and sucking her womanhood until she finished on my face and in my mouth,"God that feels amazing" she said letting me out of her mouth, she turned and rolling onto her back, pulled me over with her and taking me in her hand she guided me inside of her slowly, squeezing and caressing me inch by inch until I was all the way in, then she wrapped her legs around me, looked into my eyes, and said "Fuck me as hard as you can". So I did, and we both came, her at least 2 more times as I filled her with mine, then I slid down her body and proceeded to lick and suck her clean, making her cum again, then I picked her up and held her in my arms as she cried again, I held her till she was finished , then we laid down on the bed, and went to sleep snuggled together, in what would be the last decent sleep we would get for almost 6 months.

When we woke up that afternoon we didnt say much, just cleaned up and headed back to the lab where the coroner, Gina Dubois, was waiting with her report. " This is a bad one Mat, he has added to his repertoire. She died due to almost total exsanguination ... she lost about 95% of her total blood volume. But before she died he hurt her bad, I counted 146 broken bones, almost every single muscle, tendon and ligament was either stretched or torn, she was beaten worse than the rest ... " , she paused and I could feel the anger and frustration radiating from her, "She was raped repeatedly with a sharp double edged weapon both vaginally and analy, then he forced salt inside of her with a large rounded blunt object about 10 inches in diameter ... he tore her open inside so bad that even if she had been in a hospital she would have died!" " He also raped her and left fluids behind which we are analyzing now, but there is something else ..." and again she paused. "What is it Gina?" Asked Teri. Gina still hesitated, then finally spoke. "He left something else behind inside of her, a letter addressed to Mat" she said, " The letter is in my office since I haven't logged it into evidence yet." "Gina, what are you hiding?" I asked, "Not logging evidence is not like you, and you are kinda worrying me right now." "Fucking A and you should be worried, Mat he knows your full name, not just the goddamned initials, he knows you almost intimately," she said, "You don't even have your middle name listed officially anywhere, I know, I checked, so how the hell does he know so much about you?" Now I am not the kind of person that gives out my personal information to anyone, so for the bastard to know so much... " Gina, Teri, I swear I don't know, only 5 or 6 people know that name, there is a fucking reason I don't use it," I said, "The man that raped my mother and got her pregnant, he ... he kept tabs on her, and when she went into labor he followed her to the fucking hospital, and after I was born, he just walked in proud as you fucking please, and added a name to my birth certificate, my middle name... God I hate the name, but I have used what happened to her to become the cop I am, my middle name is, Dubois..." I heard Gina and Teri both draw in sharp breaths as they digested what I had just told them. I went into Gina's office and found the letter, and walked outside debating on who could know my full name, and hate me enough to do this kind of fucked up bullshit in my city.

Teri caught up to me as I was getting in my truck, "Mat" she began, "I am so sorry, you never told me anything about your childhood or growing up with what happened to you. But it doesn't change who you are, you are still my partner and goddammnit I need you to be at your best because this fucker is killing children in our city and he almost got you, so snap the fuck out of what ever funk your in and let's get to work and catch this maniac!" Leave it to Teri to put it so plainly and yet so perfectly, " Ok, T, your right, we need to go to the hospital so I can talk to Ashley, she needs to know about the letter." The letter! I hadn't even looked at it yet, and suddenly I was afraid to! Before I go too much further let me explain a bit more... Ashley Wise was the doctor that operated on me and the other cops that were wounded in the failed attempt to catch this bastard, but more importantly she is my baby sister.

"She is one of the very few people that know my full name so I need to talk to her ASAP."

I now my grammar and punctuation is atrocious but bear with me it is a work in progress

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silenthilllz · 5 years ago

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Promise Me (Jean x Reader)

MK SO I TYPED THIS ON MY PHONE AND SO ITS SHITTY, but hey, i tried my damn best after i havent written in so long :p. i have no fucking idea how to write as anyone from this series

It felt like you were standing in a fiery inferno. Everything was too hot and sweat started to drip from your pores. Your skin was on fire, a burning sensation filling your chest. You felt sluggish. It hurt every time you moved.

You could step away from it all easily. It was just a bonfire of all your friends corpses. Their bones beginning to dissolve into ashes and whatever remains they had were evaporating into thin air.

All of your senses were on fire. Sight, touch, hearing, taste, and smell... everything hurt and burned your body. But for some reason, even though the pain was beginning to get worse, you stayed put.

You looked at those who had survived the battle of Trost. It filled your heart with pain.

Scared pained faces filled with grief and mourning surrounded the courtyard. Most people were in tears and those who weren’t managed to keep a straight face. But their eyes showed the emotions they were feeling.

You took a deep breath, inhaling the ashes of fallen comrades and smoke. It hurt your lungs. It probably wasn’t a good idea to inhale it at such a close range of the bonfire, but you refused to step away from the fire.

“How.. how could this happen? We were ready! And everything went to shit quickly!” A cadet sobbed while holding onto a tattered cloth. They held the cloth to their face, trying to stifle their cries.

You bent down to their level, trying to smile in this darkest time. “It’ll be ok. We just have to adjust and move on.” You rubbed their back slowly.

“How can I move on when my little brother died in this fucking nightmare?!” The cadet refused to look at you.

“I don’t think your little brother would want you to stay like this. He would want you to accept it, and hopefully you can take revenge.” Your words weren’t hopeful, but you were trying your best in your current state.

The cadet’s sobbing grew quiet as they stood up slowly, still gripping the cloth of their younger brother in their hand. They finally looked at you, tears escaping their eyes as they bit their lip. “I’ll fight for my little brother. I’ll avenge him. That’s the least I can do now.”

You smiled at them. “That’s good.”

The cadet nodded, wiping their tears away and ran off back to wherever.

There was still people in mourning for their fallen comrades and family members, and so you tried your best to make them feel a little better even if your actions and words did little to their broken state.

As time went on and the sky grew darker, there were less people making vows at the bonfire. Some senior members had dumped off more bodies into the fire, trying to clean up the aftermath of Trost.

You looked at the bodies that had caught on fire as soon as they made contact with the flames. You recognized a few of them. They were your friends from the 104th training Corp. You bit your lip and gave a hearty salute towards your fallen comrades.

There was a weird sensation of being pulled towards the fire. It beckoned you closer, and you just about went into the blazing inferno when someone pulled you back into their arms.

“Everyone is gone... Mina, Thomas, Marco... I can’t lose you either.” A voice had spoken to you as they struggled not to cry against your shoulder.

You tried to pull away from them. You needed to go. “Jean...”

“I don’t know what I’m going to do. I was so set on heading into the military police with Marco that I didn’t think something like this would happen. My best friend is dead, and I don’t even know how he died!” Jean’s voice wavered. His grip on you got more tight; he was afraid you would vanish if he let go.

“Jean, maybe you should go into the scouting legion.” Your voice was quiet. The fire danced in front of you.

“I’ll probably fucking die if I do that! I’ll meet Marco earlier than I want too.. but at least I’ll meet him again.” His voice grew quiet. His grip slackened on you ever so slightly. He seemed to be debating something in his head.

Your eyes widened, swiftly turning around to face Jean Kirchstein. You reared your hand back and slapped him hard in the face. You swore you heard a cracking noise, and your hand hurt like hell but it didn’t matter at the moment.

Jean immediately woke up and held his throbbing cheek. “What the hell was that for?!” He stepped a little away from you, glaring into your eyes.

“Don’t you throw your life away to go meet Marco!! Marco would never approve of that! I’m sure as hell he would want you to use your skills for humanity!” You snapped at him. You didnt care about the little scene you were causing at the moment. You needed Jean to think clearly.

He gave you an incredulous look, “What skills?! I’m sure being brutally honest is not a good skill to have in this world where I could die at any moment!”

“You made it in the top ten in the training camp! That says a lot about you! I’m pretty sure Marco has told you a million times you would make a great leader. Use some common sense and put those skills to use!” You stepped closer to Jean. “Don’t give up because Marco isn’t here. He would want you to live. All of our fallen comrades would want us to live for them.”

Jean was on the verge of crying as he held his face. “But..”

You sensed his hesitation and boldly stepped forward. Grabbing the front strap of his harness and pulling it towards yourself, you smashed your lips against his chapped ones.

Jean went rigid before processing the fact you were kissing him in front of the fire that burned his fallen comrades. He took all what courage he had left and kissed back before you pulled away.

You smiled softly, feeling that burning sensation flare up again. Breaking apart from Jean, you smiled kindly at him. “Jean, please keep living for them.. for Marco...” You noticed your vision was fading slowly.

Jean began to quietly sniffle. He held you close to him, pressing a kiss on the top of your head. “I promise.” It had been a solid five minutes as Jean held you against him just existing close to one another.��He rocked back and forth, whispering incoherent things to you.

You closed your eyes for the moment. You wanted this moment to last forever, but you knew it wouldn’t. Not for you at least… And at this moment, the burning sensation flared up painfully. You couldn’t ignore it this time. It was time. “Jean?”

Jean made a noise that signaled he had heard you. His eyes still transfixed on the bonfire.You didn’t want to do this, but you had to. “I think I heard Connie calling for you. You better go.” Your eyes got blurry as you struggled not to cry.

Jean looked back to where all the other recruits were heading too. He did see Connie waving to him. “I wonder what he wants… but he can wait, I wanna spend more time with you.”

“Jean it might be important. I’ll still be here when you’re done talking with Connie. Just go.” You pushed him softly away from yourself and smiled at him. Your smiles always made him do whatever you asked him to do, and it worked again this time.

“But I don’t wanna..” he grumbled. He nuzzled his head into the crook of your shoulder.

“Jean, go. I’ll be waiting.”Jean whined but went anyway. As he jogged over to where he saw Connie, he looked back at you. “You better stay put!”

You giggled, waving him off as he pushed his way through the crowd to find Connie. Sighing heavily, you looked back at the bonfire. You stepped closer and with each step, you felt the flames encircle your body. You looked back to where you last saw Jean.

“Did you say your goodbyes?”

You looked in front of yourself to see a freckled face smiling sadly at you. Behind him were other people who you knew all too well. “Not much of a goodbye, but I did tell him important things.”

“Well that’s good. Come on, we have to go. It’s our time. We can’t stay any longer.” The boy said, holding out his hand for me to take.

“I wish I didn’t end like this.” You muttered as you grabbed his hand and walked into the fire. “Life is too short in this world.”

“Yeah, I’ll miss our little squabbles. But we get to make new ones on our own, and while watching our friends.” He let go of your hand and walked further into the smoke with everyone else.

You looked back once more to see Jean calling your name while frantically searching for you.

Connie seemed to be with him with a grim expression on his face. Connie said something you couldn’t make out but you guessed what it was. Jean then started shaking Connie while yelling.

You kept on walking, knowing how this would play out. You couldn’t stay. After all, you were dead.

#my writing #my writing 2019 #fanfic #oneshot #x reader #snk x reader #jean kirstein x reader #jean kirchstein x reader #i forgot how to write #its from my phone so theres spelling errors probably #sfw #aot x reader

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negasonicimagines · 6 years ago

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Gladdest (Soulmate AU)

For this, I’ll be using the soulmate AU where what happens to your soulmate’s body happens to you. I’m not sure who originally came up with this. Basically, how it works, is like, if your soulmate gets punched in the face, you feel like you’ve been punched in the face. If your soulmate dies, you don’t die, but you feel it. Same with broken bones, you’ll feel it, but your arm won’t actually be broken. But not just pain, other stuff. Like if your soulmate cries, you’ll feel it, but you don’t cry unless they’re super heartbroken, or if they get a really good hug you feel it, too. In my version of this AU, the pain and other feeling doesn’t start until you turn sixteen. Imagine how fucked up it would be if that wasn’t the case and you had a partner older than you? Like, while 13-year old Bill gets in a fight, his soulmate, who is only 3, feels the same punches and kicks. It’d be so fucked up.

warnings: nsfw (but no actual sex, just a lot of talking about it [and masturbation] and some sexually tense scenes), the reader nearly has a panic attack (again, i know, sorry. what can I say? I project), & reader has a thing for.... erotic asphyxiation. let me know if i missed anything.

I am very open to writing a part two with smut... I just chickened out with this because I felt it wouldn’t be good writing.

You’d been sixteen for a little while now, and there hadn’t been much contact from your soulmate aside from the occasional feel of a phone falling on your face and smacking it.

It’s the beginning of a new school year at Xavier’s, and you’re pretty thrilled. Your roommate this year is your best friend, Ellie. Okay, not just your best friend, she’s your crush, too. Do I really have to say, at this point?

“Hey,” she greets you, sounding rather sullen as she enters your dorm, where you sit on the edge of your bed.

“What’s up?” you ask.

“I turned sixteen over the summer and I haven’t felt anything to give me a hint. All my soulmate does is cry.”

“All my soulmate does is drop their phone on their face,” you offer a complaint in return, and the two of you lock eyes for a moment, one of realization.

“No,” Ellie says. “No.” She’s bright red, immediately thinking of just how many hot summer nights she was kept up, orgasm after orgasm after orgasm, gasping for breath at the way her soulmate’s fingers curled just right, just fucking right. There’s no way you, her crush and her best friend, were that good.

“No, can’t be,” you agree.

“Could be,” she reminds you.

“It’d make sense,” you admit.

“I hate everyone else but you.”

“We could try to find out,” you suggest.

She pinches herself.

“Ow! Not like that!” You whine, clutching at your arm. “Oh, well, I guess it’s too late th-” Ellie cuts you off with her eyes alone.

“Where does all that energy come from, Y/N?! What are you, the Energizer bunny?! At least three times a night, every night! What the hell?!”

You blush deeply, scratching the back of your neck. You hadn’t exactly expected you’d meet your soulmate anytime soon, or that they’d be bold enough to comment on your habits.

“I dunno, I thought it was normal for kids our age…” you mumble.

“Oh, yeah, well some people like sleeping and not screaming into the pillow because their soulmate has a little too much fun doing the five finger shuffle!”

“Please, louder. I think a few people in Antarctica didn’t hear you,” you retort, looking up at her from where you were sitting with a challenging expression.

“We’ve been friends for all this time and I never knew what a horny bastard you are,” she remarks.

“Well, I’m not the one who was ‘screaming’ in pleasure,” you mutter.

“I heard that!” she says, her expression still adorably indignant.

“If you hated it so much, you should’ve just got those over the counter meds, Antifel or whatever.”

“I- I…” She sighs. “Yeah, I didn’t hate it that much,” she admits, and you smile a bit. “But I wasn’t a fan of the choking,” she adds, gesturing at your scarf, your favorite one that she never would’ve guessed hides the bruises from where you’ve choked yourself with a belt, at least not before. “I’m more of a choker than a ‘chokee’, but, I guess that’d be obvious, wouldn’t it? Considering we’re soulmates and all.”

You nod, your eyes now on your lap, the floor, her tee shirt, the lamp in the corner, anything that isn’t her eyes, and she smirks.

“Oh, so now you’re shy?”

“A little,” you quietly reply, and she sits next to you on your bed.

“Let’s cool down,” she offers. “We’ve just seen each other after months of purely texting and the occasional phone call.”

“Thanks,” you respond, finding it easier to breathe.

“Why were you crying so much?” Ellie asks, addressing her original observation.

“Just depressed and lonely and stuff. I don’t have friends in my hometown, not like you.”

“You’ll always have me,” she says. “I mean it.”

“I’d hope so, soulmate,” you laugh off the seriousness of the conversation, and she sighs, looking to your eyes with her own soulful ones.

“I’m glad it’s you,” she tells you. “I don’t think I’d be able to stand anyone else.”

“Yeah, right!” you huff out a laugh, confused at her sudden emotional openness. Sure, she was more honest about her feelings with you than anyone else, but that didn’t mean that she was a completely open book. Who was?

“You’re not disappointed, are you?” Ellie wonders because of your remark.

“God, no! I- I actually have a really big crush on you,” you admit.

“Yeah?” she asks, the cutest little grin on her face, you know the one. “I have a crush on you, too.”

You blush again.

“Sorry… I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, I’m not very good at flirting or anything like that. I don’t really care about much of anyone at all, and you’re definitely the only person I’ve really cared about in a romantic way, so…”

“No, it’s not that! I- You- You being really good at flirting is what’s got me like this. And the fact that I’m a dork who’s really bad at flirting contributes,” you explain.

“I am? Good at flirting, I mean.”

“Well, with me, at least,” you tell her.

“Um… Sorry if it’s lame to ask, but… Can I kiss you?”

“Of course! And it’s not lame to ask at all, El, I appreciate it actua- Mmf!”

You could live forever in the feeling of her lips on yours, her hands oh-so carefully holding your cheeks.

“Sorry,” she shyly says, as she slowly pulls away from you, looking in your eyes. “I’ve just been wanting to do that for a really, really long time. Pretty much since we met, actually.”

“R-really?” you ask, a bit breathless and definitely still flustered.

“Yeah, you’re perfect. In, like, every way. It’s the worst and the best.”

“I’m perfect?! But you’re- You’re you!” you argue, and she shakes her head, rolling her eyes. “I’m so lucky.”

“No, I’m the lucky one,” she disagrees.

“We can both be lucky,” you tell her, and she sighs.

“I suppose that’s a good compromise,” she decides. “So, what should we do before dinner? We’ve got a couple hours to kill, but I don’t think either of us has much more to say that wouldn’t be repetitive or… Something.” She blushes again, cheeks bright pink.

You blush back, reminded that she knew all about you and the things you did to yourself behind doors. “R-right,” you reply. Hey, you may be a horny motherfucker, but that doesn’t make you any less of a bottom.

“Can I see?” she asks, touching at your scarf. You nod, and she unwraps the scarf. She carefully touches the spotted bruises with her fingers. “With the belt you’re wearing?”

You can’t even speak. You nod, and the ghost of a smile graces her face before she just barely presses her lips to the bruises closest to her, on the side of your neck. Your hand quickly grabs her bicep tightly, and she stops, looking to you with concern.

“I’m so sorry, I got a bit carried aw-”

“No, no, it’s good, I’m just… Sensitive there,” you admit, and one of the biggest smiles you’ve seen her wear is on her lips.

“Yeah?” she asks, taking her crossbody bag off of her shoulder and opening it. She takes out a bottle of Antifel pills. “How sensitive?”

“Oh God, um… I- Um…” Your nerves are really getting to you, and your breathing gets heavier as you stare at the bottle. This is really happening. It’s really happening. You’d always wanted to, especially with her, but now that it’s a reality, you feel on the brink.

Ellie can recognize that look in your eyes, and it’s a look she’d hoped she’d never be the cause of.

“Shit, Y/N. What’s going on? Talk to me.”

“I- Um, I just- I want to? But I- I just- I don’t know, it’s just getting really hard to breathe, and uh, not in a hot way,” you joke nervously.

“Hey, you can want to and not be ready to right this minute. We haven’t even been on a date yet, okay? I’m really sorry if I made you feel like you had to do anything you didn’t want to,” Ellie tells you, and she feels immensely guilty either way.

“No! I liked you kissing me, especially where you did, but, you’re right. We should probably adjust to the news and put a label on whatever this is before we do anything too serious.”

Ellie nods. “You always were the more logical one. I’ll put these in the medicine cabinet and we can just… Talk about stuff, like we always do.”

“But with more kissing and cuddling, I hope?” you request, and she nods, going to put the bottle away before returning to find you bundled up in her comforter. “It’s so cozy…” you practically sing, at least to her.

“This is a dream,” she sighs happily, slipping off her shoes and joining you in her bed. You spoon her side, and she hums in content, stroking your hair.

“You’re in a good mood,” you comment. Ellie is not a very cheerful person, at least not openly. So, to see her like this was surprising.

“Yeah, of course I am. It’s you. It’s really you. I’ve never been happier in my life,” she says, having really been hit with the fact that you’re her soulmate. All hers. “All mine…” she hums.

“You really know how to make a girl feel special… I mean it. I’m really not all that.”

“Please be my girlfriend,” she requests.

“Only if you’ll be mine,” you reply, and she scoffs.

“I think that’s how that works, babe.”

Your heart skips a beat and you stare at her in wonder.

“Sorry for not asking if pet names were okay…It’s just something I like, it’s really stupid.”

“No, I really like it, hence the dumb stare and the lack of breathing.”

She chuckles, holding you tighter. You smile with her, glad that she’s happy.

“I hope you don’t feel like you have to over-exaggerate how happy you are. It’s okay if you’re not ridiculously happy about finding your soulmate.”

“Oh, no, I’m as happy as I sound. I’m, uh, definitely a textbook case of Lesbian That’s A Grumpy Bitch Til She Gets A Girlfriend. But then again, I’ll probably just be a significantly less grumpy bitch to everyone but you, sorry.”

“I don’t mind, I like you being your bitchy self,” you reply, being rewarded with a kiss placed atop your head that sends tingles dancing down your body. “Mm… I like that.”

“Good,” Ellie responds. “I’m glad.”

“I’m gladder,” you tease.

“I’m gladdest...”

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bazzledazzled · 6 years ago

Note

Have you seen that fanart of beauxbatons!Lance and Durmstrang!Keith? You could write about them meeting during the Triwizard Tournament... Maybe even attending the Yule Ball?

anon u have answered my prayers all i have been reading is harry potter fanfic I AM READY AND I LOVE THIS IDEA AND I CAN’T BELIEVE I HAVENT THOUGHT OF IT YET????? Anyways here we go this is gonna be great.

Also lance with glasses fite me

also i feel like i should have a warning about this but there’s langst which means basically boggart lance is telling lance that he’s terrible and ye (like the squip!)

This turned out way longer than expected so here’s a 10k word fic!

I am going to kill this boy, Keith thought to himself as his eyes narrowed at the Beauxbatons boy. The names had just been drawn for the Triwizard Tournament, and Keith was a whirlwind of emotions.

For one, there was the fact that of all the people from Durmstrang including his adopted brother, Shiro, he was the idiot chosen to compete. He was the one chosen to be put in the spotlight when he barely even wanted to be at the stupid Tournament, even as a spectator. And now everyone was giving him attention, including a painfully cute brown haired boy with glasses and the most dazzling smile that would make anyone swoon.

Except the brown haired boy wasn’t making Keith swoon at this very moment, because the brown haired boy decided to be annoying and actually talk to Keith, even though they were competing against each other.

“So….. you nervous?” The boy asks, casually seating himself beside Keith. They were supposed to attend a meeting after the drawing to discuss rules and stuff for this years tournament. The brown haired boy named something stupid that started with an “L” was from Beauxbatons, the Hogwarts girl named something that Keith couldn’t remember who was wearing a Slytherin tie, and Keith, representing his own school, Durmstrang.

“No,” Keith says, brushing the other boy off, ending his sentence with a definitive end to tell the boy to go away. The boy did not go away.

“I’m nervous. I mean, I guess I’m not super nervous because I’ve seen this happen before and I’m pretty sure I could handle the different challenges, but it’s exciting, isn’t it?” There’s an excited smile on his face, one that could’ve been contagious if Keith wasn’t so angry at him for interrupting his brooding session.

“I guess.”

“You guess? Wow you Durmstrangs are lame, am I right Ravenclaw?” The Ravenclaw girl seems caught off-guard as she looks up, eyes wide before nodding in agreement, definitely not knowing what he just said.

“Are not!” Keith says, not sure why he’s getting defensive. He himself has said that Durmstrang is lame, but it hurt coming from someone else’s mouth. Especially from a Beauxbaton who had horrible taste.

“Mmkay,” the boy says with a sly smile. Keith wanted to punch him.

“You Beauxbatons are to pretentious,” Keith says with an eyeroll. The boy raises an eyebrow. “And the Durmstrangs aren’t?” Keith looks at him with an “are you being serious?” expression.

“What! You were all flashy and stuff when you came in.”

“And you weren’t?!” Keith says, still confused as to where the boy was going with this.

“Yeah but we did it in a cool way.”

“So did we!”

“Nuh uh!”

“Yeah huh!” The Sytherin girl bangs her book on the table, causing both of the boys shut up.

“I am trying to read,” she says, exasperated. He wrinkles his nose.

“Since when do people read?”

“Since forever??” The brown haired boy rolls his eyes.

“That’s lame.”

“Beauxbatons is lame,” the girl shoots back. The boy looks offended.

“HAH! See?”

“You two are getting taken down.” The girl just rolls her eyes, turning back to her book. Keith tries to come up with a witty reply, but not before the headmasters of the three schools come in.

“Congradulations! You three are the champions for this years Triwizard Tournament! Lance Mcclain will be competing for the Beauxbatons,” –Lance gives a charming smile– “Katie Holt will be representing Hogwarts–” “It’s Pidge,” the Slytherin girl pitches in, not looking up from her book. “And from our very own Durmstrang, Keith Kogane!” There was the sound of crickets. The headmaster of Durmstrang takes a deep breath.

“Your first trial will be held next week, which should give you plenty of time to prepare.” The headmasters go on about rules and make sure they know that the games are dangerous and that they accept the conciquences, and basically reading over the terms and conditions everyone usually skips over to get to the good stuff. The Beauxbatons boy– Lance– couldn’t seem to sit still as he went from tapping his foot, to tapping his fingers, to fidgeting with his hair. It started to irritate Keith to the point where he wasn’t paying attention, just glaring at Lance.

“Any questions?” There were none.

“Great! We’ll see you next week for the tournament.” They leave the room, leaving the three of them to assume that they were dismissed. Pidge didn’t even skip a beat, definitely seeming to get some time to herself before she was pushed into various interviews with flashing cameras and annoying fans. Keith was about to do the same, but not before Lance grabbed his elbow. Keith turned in both surprise and annoyance. Lance was lucky he had such a pretty face, or else Keith might’ve broken his nose.

“May the best man win,” he said with a smirk, holding his hand out. Keith hesitated before shaking it.

“Good luck losing.” Keith walked out of the room, the tiniest of smiles on his lips.

The first challenge was… moderate. At least for Keith.

Lance on the other hand… struggled.

The task was simple. They were to walk into the arena where a boggart was waiting for them. The boggart would morph into their greatest fear and they would yell “ridiculous!” and it would be gone.

Except it didn’t end there. Because as soon as you got rid of one boggart, two more would take it’s place. And you would keep doing that again and again, until you were surrounded by hundreds of boggarts, all portraying your biggest fear, which is something that Lance never wanted to become public.

Lance stepped into the arena, heading for the closet, his head held high. He opened the door boggart walked out of that closet, taking the form of Lance, except it was some form of a twisted Lance, with glowing yellow eyes and fangs.

It wasn’t scary or frightening in the way a spider was. It wasn’t stupid like Pidge’s where the boggart turned into one of her teachers saying she was failing every class except lunch. But Lance knew, as soon as the creature opened its mouth, the monster was supposed to represent his insecurities.

You’re a coward. You don’t even belong here. Filthy mud-blood.

Lance gulped, the spell on the tip of his tongue. It wouldn’t come out.

Your parents would disown you if they knew who you really were. All your friends are faking it. They don’t care about you. No one does. You can’t even care about yourself.

Lance squeezes his eyes shut, hearing the words echo and bounce around inside his head. They were always there, at the back of his mind whenever he talked to a friend or he didn’t tell his family that he was actually a wizard instead of just going to some fancy private school he got a scholarship for. Or when he found himself daydreaming about a black haired boy, knowing that he was out of his league and the boy was probably straight anyways.

You’re selfish. Everyone hates you. The world would be better off without you.

Lance takes a deep breath. He can feel the tears welling inside him, and he knows everyone is watching. This is supposed to be a test of strength, a chance to prove that he isn’t some shitty wizard who everyone thought cheated the system to get into the Triwizard Tournament even though he didn’t. But standing there, facing the bogart, he started to wonder if the whole thing was a mistake.

“Ridiculous!” He cries, summoning all his energy, every single pent up emotion inside him as he looked the bogart in the eyes, telling himself one thing over and over. I am enough.

There was something different about the way his wand cast the spell than when he cast it before. For a moment he thought it was because he did something wrong and the spell was backfireing as a blue light started to glow from the wand. As it got brighter, to the point where it was blinding, Lance started to worry he might blow himself and the rest of the spectators up. Some Triwizard Tournament that would be. He could already see the headlines of the boy who ruined everything.

And then.. something amazing happened. It was almost as if he cast a patronus charm, which didn’t make sense. The light danced in the air with no distinct shape. It saw the bogart, darting for it and causing it to disappear. Like before when Pidge did it, two more took its place, but before Lance could even raise his wand to get rid of them, the light darted through them, and they were gone just like the first. There were gasps from the crowd and Lance gaped in amazement as the spell took out bogarts faster than his eye could catch. It only faded when the biggest one of all appeared, towering over Lance in all its glory. Lance gulped, facing it, trying to tap into the same energy from earlier.

As the bogart took form, Lance realized instead of being a large version of himself, similar to the ones before, it was shrinking, taking the form of a large mass of people, all of which he recognized. All of them were shouting insults as they surrounded him.

His family was there, his sisters and brothers and niece and nephew. His mom and dad too, both barely looking at him, telling him he was a disgrace to his family. He turned away, only to bump into his friends, shouting insults at him. Allura told him that he was a thorn in her side for years, and how she wanted to get rid of him, but he kept coming back. Hunk told him he never did everything right and that he would never be taken seriously as long as he had Lance for a friend. Tears pooled in Lance’s eyes as he turned away from them, wrapping his arms around himself.

There were teachers there too. The told him he was failing, said that he was barely even a wizard considering how bad he was at magic. They said he was probably more of a muggle and never had a spot in Beauxbatons to begin with. Classmates taunted him, calling him crude names, chanting “mud-blood” as they grinned viciously. Lance curled in on himself, not sure what to do.

“What’s taking him so long?” Pidge says inside the tent, fiddling with some muggle device. Keith leaned against the wall, practicing spells and ignoring her.

“You’re just mad because you failed.” Pidge shoots him a glare, but Keith doesn’t give her the satisfaction of even looking at her.

“I did better than he is if he’s taking this long.” Suddenly shouts Keith assumed to be the crowd at first, grew louder and more vicious. It startled the two champions and they shared a look.

“That doesn’t sound good….” They rush out of the tent, looking around, trying to figure out what is going around.

The arena was filled with people. All of them were shouting angrily, at a specific person who Keith could only guess was Lance. The crowd was completely quiet, some of them turning away from the scene, feeling bad for the boy at the center of the chaos. The judges were talking amongst themselves, not yet sure if they should call it. Keith takes a look at Pidge and Pidge looks at him before he darts into the arena. He hears Pidge call his name, but he doesn’t listen.

Inside the arena is madness. People were yelling and screaming and throwing things. They were trying to push their way through the crowd to get to the center, all of their words negative. None of the words were directed at him, but Keith could feel his self-esteem lowering, making him feel weak inside. He couldn’t imagine what it was like for Lance. He pulls out his wand, casting spells to get people out of his way. He needs to get to the center. From there, he doesn’t know what he’ll do. He doesn’t even know what Lance is facing since he was supposed to go last.

He makes it to the center and sees Lance. The poor Beauxbatons boy is on the ground, curled up into a ball as tears stream down his face. A boiling hot anger suddenly fills Keith, one that he’s experienced many times before. He didn’t care if they all signed up for this, nobody should be put through this much emotional trauma.

“Lance!” Keith calls as people try to shove him back. Lance doesn’t move.

“LANCE!” Keith calls again. Lance grits his teeth.

“LANCE!” Keith emerges from the crowd, looking down at Lance, who looks up at him, hatred shinning through his expression.

“I just met you how can you already hate me?” Keith frowns, bending down to Lance.

“C’mon. Your trial’s over.” Lance looks up at him, his chin wobbling. Keith immediately feels a sort of protectiveness for this boy. He was battling too many monsters, many of which Keith found himself battling as well.

“Shove off, Kogane.” Keith huffs, grabbing Lance’s arm roughly and pulling him up. Lance pulls away, his shoulders hunched.

Someone jumps out at them, their expression vicious as they spit out words, calling Lance things like “mud-blood” and other even worse variations. Without thinking, Keith throws himself in front of Lance as if he could protect Lance from the person’s hurtful words.

Then something interesting happens. The crowd merges together in one large form, the image flickering and stretching. Keith furrows his brow in confusion

It starts to take form, glimmering black hair styled like Keith’s and bright, glowing yellow eyes with purple irises. The creatures fingers elongated into talons coated in blood and even around it’s mouth Keith could see traces of it. There was a wicked grin on its face and its clothes were in tatters. Keith recognized it immediately. He recalled a Defense Against the Dark Arts class from years before when they first learned about Bogarts. He was faced with this same monster, his greatest fear.

He was scared he would turn into this monster.

He grabs his wand, ignoring the fears rooted deep in his stomach as he shouted “RIDICULOUS!”

The air was still. The bogart was gone. Behind him, Keith heard Lance sniffle. Everyone was looking at him with disbelief, including the Beauxbatons boy.

“Why would he do that!?” Lance says exasperatedly as he talks to his friend, Hunk. Hunk was from Hogwarts and an old friend of Lance’s. Their families were close and Hunk was surprised learn that Lance too was a wizard. They usually didn’t talk much over the school year considering they went to different schools, but they hung out almost all the time over the summer, telling school secrets about Hogwarts and Beauxbatons that they thought the other might find funny.

Hunk shrugs, obviously tired of this conversation. This is the third time Lance has talked about it since the competition. “Why don’t you ask him.” Lance gave him a repulsed look.

“I can’t ask mullet why he saved me.”

“Awww you have nicknames for each other.”

“No we don’t! We barely even know each other.”

“Just because you don’t know him doesn’t mean you don’t like him.”

“Wh-what?” Lance says, his cheeks reddening. Hunk laughs.

“Look Keith probably saved you because he felt bad for you. I would’ve done the same.” Lance crosses his arms and sticks out his lip.

“I didn’t need saving.” Hunk sighs, knowing that Lance was probably embarrassed that he wasn’t able to handle a simple bogart.

“Did you prepare for the next task.” Lance groans.

“No.”

“Do you know what it’s going to be.”

“I don’t know! They gave us a vague clue.”

“Clues are supposed to be vague.” Lance huffs, hitting his head on the table.

“What is it? Maybe I can help.”

“They said something about looking through the history of Triwizard Tournaments.” Hunk furrowed his brow.

“Why?” Lance shrugs.

“If I had to guess, they ran out of ideas and they’re stealing one from a previous one.”

“Did they say anything else?”

“They said it would jump out from history, that there was something about the tournament that was different than the others.” A lightbulb goes off in Hunk’s head.

“We should head to the library.”

Keith just wanted to have a quiet study session for the tests he had to take, was that too much to ask? It didn’t seem like much and, for the most part, people kept to themselves in the library because that’s what people do at libraries.

Lance Mcclain seems to have not gotten the hint.

“What are you doing here Kogane?” Lance says, looking at Keith with narrowed eyes. Keith looks up at him, a bored expression on his face.

“Some of us actually go to school her,” Keith says, turning back to his textbooks. Lance huffs, siting beside Keith.

“Do you want something or are you just here to make sure I fail potions?” Lance glares at him, getting more annoyed when he sees that Keith just ignores him. Lance puts his hand over Keith’s textbook, forcing him to look into the Beauxbaton boy’s blue eyes. He’s aware of how close they are and how cute Lance is… for a Beauxbaton. Too bad Lance hates him, Keith might have even dated him.

“What do you want, Mcclain?” Lance’s jaw is set. He looks like a boy on a mission.

“Why did you help me?” Keith bites his lip, trying to actually figure out why he did it. He shrugs.

“I felt bad for you,” he says, grabbing his textbook and scooting away from Lance. Lance grabs his arm.

“I didn’t need saving,” Lance says, pratically choking on emotion. Keith puts his books down, turning back to Lance, concern in his eyes. Lance’s face flushed with embarrassment as he let go of Keith’s arm.

“I just… I’m not stupid, alright?”

“I didn’t say that you were?” Keith furrows his brow in confusion.

“The cup picked me for a reason this isn’t some mistake.” Lance clenches his fists, barely even looking at Keith.

“Are you… okay?”

“No.” Lance slumps against him, crossing his arms. It catches Keith off-guard, considering he’s not the most affectionate person, but a look into Lance’s eyes tells Keith that he needs something to ground him.

“Um….” Keith doesn’t know what he should do. In his head he’s going into a gay panic.

“I’ll show them,” Lance says determinedly to himself. Keith doesn’t even know what he’s talking about. “I’m going to place first in the next challenge. I’m going to win.”

“Hey Lance!” A voice calls. There’s a chorus of “shhh”s directed at a boy in a yellow Hufflepuff tie, he apologizes, running towards Keith and Lance. Lance jumps away from Keith, perking up slightly. Hunk takes the seat next to Lance, making Keith even more annoyed. Really he just wanted to study, not have a party with his rival and said rival’s friend.

“What’s up?” The Hufflepuff flips through a book that seems to be full of old records. Keith can’t help but be slightly interested. He leans over Lance’s shoulder. Lance turns to him, a smirk on his face.

“You trying to cheat, mullet?” Keith turns bright red. He moves away from Lance.

“I wasn’t– I was just–” Lance looks thoughtful.

“Tell you what…” Both Keith and the Hufflepuff boy raise an eyebrow.

“I’ll help you in the next challenge.” Keith’s eyebrows seem to raise even more.

“Okay?”

“I mean, it’s the least I can do after… the incident that shall not be named.”

“Okay??” Lance nods, satisfied, and turns back to Hunk.

“Go on.”

“Do you remember Harry Potter’s Triwizard Tournament?”

The weeks leading up to the second trial were… interesting to say the least. Lance was dead set on repaying Keith after the first trial, which meant that he followed him. Everywhere.

Keith wanted to complain but… he began to enjoy Lance’s company. Because they were visiting, students from Beauxbatons and Hogwarts weren’t required to go to classes like the rest of the Durmstrang students, but they were highly encouraged to go to these classes and experience new “cultures.”

Lance claimed that he didn’t have a choice, but Keith knew that he secretly loved accompanying Keith to his classes, helping him figure out potions and listening to Keith laugh as Lance messed up a charm. But Lance was determined to do his hardest in everything, as if he had to prove something. Sometimes he failed, sometimes he embarrassed himself miserably, but he still kept trying, and Keith found it almost admirable.

Despite being sort of kind of friends now, they still held onto some rivalish qualities, probably because everyone kept fitting them into those roles. They were going head to head in the Triwizard Tournament still, and Keith and Lance weren’t shy to go into a not so friendly competition during Transfiguration, much to their teacher’s annoyance.

That’s probably why the media was always buzzing about them.

There were tons of articles, some of them ridiculously sappy about how it’s beautiful to see their friendship blossom even though they’re from different schools. There were debates about Keith saving Lance, some people even saying that Keith should be disqualified. Some say Lance should be disqualified because he accepted Keith’s help. Some people, deep on the internet, suggested that Keith and Lance’s friendship is something more. Maybe it always has.

Except Keith and Lance were too busy for the internet, between planning how to get through the second challenge, brewing potions to help them breathe underwater, and Lance pretty much tutoring Keith in potions, there was no room in between classes to casually surf the internet. Maybe if they saw these speculations, it would’ve drawn them apart with repulsion, feeling uncomfortable with this development. Or maybe it would’ve made them realize what they really wanted.

“Scared mullet?” Lance says with a smirk, looking over at Keith as they stood over by the Lake, getting ready for the competition. Keith scowled.

“Stop calling me that.” Lance sticks his face in front of Keith’s, a mischivious grin on his face. The slightest blush crosses Keith’s face.

“Why?”

“Because my name is Keith,” Keith says, crossing his arms. Lance’s playful energy was contagious and that’s probably what Keith liked the most about him.

“You’re the one who chose to have bad hair!” Lance says defensively. Keith gasps, touching his hair.

“You take that back!”

“Seriously who cuts their hair like that!” Lance says. Keith pouts.

“You’re jealous.” Lance rolls his eyes.

“It wouldn’t be so bad if you just…” Lance digs through his pockets, looking for something. He frowns.

“Hold on.” He runs over to someone Keith supposes must be a friend who’s standing a few feet away in Beauxbaton robes holding a flag with Lance’s face on it.

“Yo Allura you got a hairtie?” Lance calls. The girl– Allura– furrows her brow.

“Yeah why?”

“My buddy Keith needs it,” Lance says, pointing over at Keith. Keith’s face goes red as he buries his head in his hands, wondering why he still let Lance do these things to him.

Lance runs back over, hairtie in hand.

“Turn around,” he orders. Keith huffs, doing as told, his face still red. Lance runs Keith’s hair through his hands, untangling any knots. He gathers his hair, pulling it up and tying the elastic around it. He turns Keith around, smiling and brushing his bangs out of his eyes and behind his ears. Lance smiles.

“You have eyes,” Lance says dorkily. Keith starts to snort, erupting into giggles and leaning on Lance slightly, the purest of expressions on his face. The smallest of blushes passes across Lance’s face and a thought flitters through his head.

Oh god help me.

Pidge, Keith, and Lance stood side by side, looking over the lake, their stomachs filled with anxiety. They all knew that they would have to find something at the bottom of the lake, thanks to them all being friends with Hunk, who was having a hard time choosing one person to root for, but they had no idea what they were actually looking for. The books from the library full of records had certain words blacked out, giving the competitors a vague idea of what the actual challenge would be.

Then, there was a loud whistle, and the second trial began.

Pidge shoved some sort of plant in her mouth, jumping in without hesitation. Lance chugged a bottle of a blue liquid that looked like water, sputtering at the taste before jumping in. Keith, since him and Lance worked on the potion together, not only for Keith’s potions project but also for this competition, did the same.

Being submerged in water was an… odd feeling. For a long moment, Keith floated, the potion taking a little longer to take effect, unlike Lance who was already halfway to the bottom.

Then he felt something pull at his feet. He looked down, gasping in shock, fumbling for his wand to cast a stupefy on whatever it was.

But there was nothing there. It was the potion, starting to take effect. Keith remembered what Lance told him, how it not only allowed you to breath underwater, but it made your body mass heavier, allowing you to sink all the way to the bottom of the ocean at a rather quick pace. It was a complex spell, one that Keith had struggled with greatly, but he got an A on the assignment and it didn’t seem to have any after effects.

When Keith got to the bottom, he saw what the “treasure” was. There was three people floating in the water, tied there with seaweed. Mermaids flocked around them.

The first person looked a lot like Pidge. In fact, it was eerie how close they resembled each other. Keith knew for a fact that it had to have been Pidge’s brother or something.

The second person was a girl. She had hair cut to about her shoulders and glasses that sat askew on her face. Her features vaguely resembled Lance, which obviously could only mean that it was Lance’s sister. Keith recalled Lance talking about her and the rest of his siblings.

The third was someone Keith knew. He didn’t have to guess to know that this was his treasure.

He would recognize his brother anywhere.

His feet touched the ground and he ran to Shiro, his jaw set. It was an odd, running in water. What was weirder was, even though Keith could see the fish swimming around him, it didn’t feel like he was running anywhere underwater. It almost felt like he was on dry land.

The mermaids didn’t stop him as he passed them. Lance was already there, tearing at the seaweed for his sister. He turned to Keith, flashing one of his dorky smiles. Keith rolled his eyes, smiling slightly as he used his wand to to cut the rope. He grabs Shiro, turning back to Lance. Above them they saw Pidge, looking angry at the fact that they beat her here. Lance pulled out a second potion from his pocket, this one more sludgy and red. Keith did the same. They looked at each other before, emptying the bottle.

Pidge got to the bottom, letting her brother free. That’s when the potion started to take effect as Keith and Lance started to rise back to the surface. As they rose, Keith started to notice the effects of the other potion start to wear off. He found it more difficult to breathe and he saw Lance seem to have the same problem. But it didn’t matter. He could see the sun above him, feeling the warmth. Lance was a good deal ahead of him, but he didn’t think anything of it.

Until he realized he wasn’t moving at all. Lance kept going up and up and up, but he stayed right there. He started to gasp for air, trying franticly to swim back up to the surface. But it wasn’t working. He felt himself inhale water and his eyes widened with panic. He tried to call out for Lance, but Lance didn’t seem to hear. Pidge swam by him and he felt the truth sink in on him.

He messed up the potion. He was going to die down here.

Lance felt like he was on top of the world. After the first challenge, he was sure the goblet made a mistake. The first challenge was supposed to be the easiest, and he couldn’t even face a bogart.

But this? This was almost too easy. He always loved potions so as soon as he heard about the challenge he knew exactly what potion he needed to make. He didn’t need the weeks to prepare it. He could’ve done it that day and had it done by dinner. But he knew that Keith struggled with potions and decided to take things slow, taking his time to explain to Keith why things worked a certain way and how to be careful with the measurements. Still, Keith struggled. The poor boy always looked so defeated when the potion blew up in his face, saying that Lance should stop trying to help him it wasn’t going to work.

But Lance didn’t give up. He wasn’t going to give up.

He can see the surface, he’s almost close enough to touch the surface and feel the cool air. He grins, looking down to share a smile with Keith, who was no doubt behind him.

Except Keith wasn’t behind him. Lance started to panic, looking around wildly. He saw Pidge come up behind him, her brow drawn. But Keith wasn’t there.

Lance pulled out his wand, casting the spell to momentarily stop the effects of the potion, just for a little bit. The world stilled and he looked down for the black haired boy in a red coat. Far bellow he spotted him. He thought about how much time he had before the spell wore off and he would be forced to float back to the top. He could cast the spell again and again, but he could feel it already starting to wear him down. He took a deep breath, hoping beyond hope that those stupid swim lessons would be useful. He let go of Veronica, letting her float to the top. God she would be so angry when she woke up. Lance still has forgotten to mention the whole wizard thing to her.

He started to swim towards Keith, kicking his legs as hard as he could. He swam past Pidge, who looked at him with confusion, but didn’t stop. She was here to win, Lance knew this. He was too, but he couldn’t leave Keith down there. What if something bad happened.

After what felt like hours but only was probably twenty minutes, Lance reached Keith. He was franticly kicking his legs, but Lance could tell he was losing energy. He had a death grip on his “treasure” and tears seemed to be pooling at his eyes. He was blue and looked on the verge of passing Lance cursed, pulling his wand back out and swimming up to Keith, grabbing his hands. Bubbles escaped from Keith’s mouth as he looked at him with surprise. Lance takes a deep breath, trying to stay calm even through Keith’s panic. He had to, or else something terrible might happened.

He remembered the charm, saying it in his head and pointing the wand up between them. A bubble swelled up between them, spreading wider and wider until it encompassed both of their heads, the bubble full of fresh air. Keith gasped, drinking up the air, his skin turning back to its normal color.

“You good?” Lance says, touching Keith’s shoulder. Keith gulps and nods, not able to form words. Lance smiled warmly, releasing the hold of the previous spell, causing them to rise up. Thankfully, whatever was causing Keith to stay stationary seemed to disappear as Lance’s potion took over him.

They surface both of them gasping as they swim to shore. Lance sees Pidge wrapped in a towel, standing next to her brother and shivering. He also saw Veronica, standing next to them, looking bewildered, but also relieved to see Lance.

Lance helps Keith stand. Keith seems to be a little weak from almost drowning. Behind them, the guy that Keith was saving, called out.

“Keith!” He runs up to him, hugging him tight. Lance smiles, walking over to his sister. She proceeded to look at him, soaking wet in his blue swim trunks. And then, miraculously, she starts to laugh.

“What?” Lance says, blushing.

“All this time I knew you were hiding a secret from us and all along its because you were going to some elite school because your a nerd.” Lance stumbles over his words, but Veronica just smiles, enveloping him in a hug. Lance smiles, glad to see his sister.

He looks back at Keith, who’s staring at him, his expression a mix of awe and confusion. Lance just laughs.

After the tournament, the three champions are ushered into a room, still dripping wet for interviews. It was obvious that they were excited to get the latest scoop, considering everyone saw Veronica surface without Lance and Lance later surface with Keith and Shiro. Everyone knew that it would add to the tale of Keith Kogane and Lance Mcclain, Friends or Lovers?

Before they started prepping them for interviews, the three discussed the events of the tournament quietly amongst themselves.

“That task wasn’t that hard…” Pidge says, obviously taking pride in the fact that she came in first place. Lance pursed his lips, nodding in agreement but also looking at Keith out of the corner of his eye, who had his blanket wrapped around him tightly. Keith didn’t say a word, frowning.

“Congrats on getting first, Pidge?” Lance says with a warm smile.

“Here’s what I don’t understand,” Pidge finally bursts. Keith and Lance incline their heads towards her.

“Lance… I saw you ahead of me. You could’ve won this and got in first place instead of making us all tied. So why didn’t you win?” Lance bites his lip. Keith looks at him too, a curious expression on his face.

“Well I… I saw that Keith was struggling…” Keith looks away blushing. He swore he saw Pidge smirk.

“So you decided to sacrifice your win to save the damsel in distress?”

“Well… yeah.” Pidge just smiles, looking like she knows something.

“I see.” They call for Lance for his interview. He grins and walks into the room, obviously enjoying the attention. Pidge turns to Keith.

“You like him.” Keith turns bright red, mumbling incoherent nothings.

“That’s ridiculous,” he says finally. Pidge raises an eyebrow.

“He’s from Beauxbatons.” Pidge’s eyebrow arches further.

“We’re rivals.” Pidge bursts out laughing.

“WHAT!” Keith says defensively. She snorts.

“Some rivals you are.” Keith plays with the sleeves of his jacket.

“I mean I guess we’re friends, but we’re competing against each other. Plus, Lance couldn’t like me back.”

“So you admit you like him.” Keith squeaks, his face as red as a tomato.

“What? No I-I was– I meant– I–” Pidge puts her hand over his mouth. He gives her a panicked expression.

“Look. I know Lance.”

“You do?”

“Yes he’s Hunk’s friend god have you been paying attention?”

“Oh yes that answered all my questions. Thank you,” Keith says sarcastically. Pidge laughs.

“Oh I like you.”

“What’s your point, Pidge?”

“I know Lance. I also know that he flirts with literally any girl he sees comma but the ones he really likes he gets all flustered and does a weird thing with his hands.”

“ I don’t understand what this has to do with anythi–”

“When he likes someone he tries to spend every waking hour with them and will do anything for them.”

“So?”. Pidge huffs.

“So I’m saying that he’s the same with you!” Keith scoffs.

“No he’s not. He’s just being Lance.” Pidge groans.

“Wow you’re about as thick as he is.”

“HEY! Lance is really smart, I’ll have you know,” Keith says defensively, maybe a small part of his tone is dreamy. Pidge rubs her brow.

“I’m too ace for this.” Lance walks back out into the waiting room, a nervous smile on his face. Keith feels his heartbeat quicken and he scratches his neck in an attempt to hide his blush. He didn’t know if it worked as Lance walked up to him.

“How did it go?” Keith asks. Lance purses his lips, fidgeting with his hand a little. Pidge gives Keith a look.

“It went good! They asked some personal stuff about… nevermind.” Maybe it was wishful thinking, but Keith swore he saw Lance blush the slightest bit. But the moment was gone.

“Kogane!” The lady called. Keith takes a deep breath, walking into the room.

The room is just a normal classroom, set up for an interview. Two chairs sit across from each other, one occupied by a lady with curly hair and glasses. Keith gulped, sitting down across from her.

“Hello Mr. Kogane,” she says, smiling warmly.

“H-hi,” Keith says, pulling at the sleeves of his jacket.

“So. This challenge was a lot harder for you, wasn’t it.” Keith gulped and nodded.

“Yes.”

“Do you care to explain what happened?” Keith dug his nails into his palm.

“I don’t know. I made my potion wrong and I couldn’t get to the surface so Lance saved me.” She raised an eyebrow.

“Do you know why he did that? Rumor has it he would’ve won if he hadn’t gone back for you.” Keith curled and uncurled his fists.

“I don’t know. It was probably payback for the first challenge.” She hummed.

“That’s not how Lance tells it.”

“How does Lance tell it?” Keith growls. The reporter flips to a new piece of paper.

“Next question. How did you feel when you saw Lance come back for you.” Keith didn’t know what this had to do anything.

“I don’t know. I was happy that I could breathe.”

“In the metaphorical sense?” Keith raised an eyebrow.

“No? He spelled a bubble around us so we could breath.” She raised an eyebrow.

“Did you say anything to him in this… bubble?”

“I couldn’t breathe?” Keith doesn’t know where she’s going with this.

“Next question. How do you feel about Lance Mcclain? Do you think your relationship has evolved?”

“Well… yeah.” The lady leans forward slightly. Keith coughs, his cheeks reddening. “Well I mean–” Keith coughs. “We’re closer friends now and stuff. And he’s really smart and helps me with my potions…”

“Is she trying to make a move on him?” Lance says, face pressed up against the glass of the classroom door. Pidge groans, playing Zelda on a DS.

“She’s not, Lance. And if she was then that would be creepy and wrong.” Lance frowns.

“She’s too close.” Pidge huffs, stepping on the tips of her toes to look in with Lance. She rolls her eyes.

“They’re literally a meter away from each other.” Lance huffs.

“He’s blushing.” Pidge groans, slinking against the floor.

“Keith’s always blushing.”

“Yeah but…”

“Lance.”

“I mean….”

“Lance.”

“What if…”

“LANCE!” Lance turns to the Pidge. She pushes up her round glasses.

“Keith is fine he’s just nervous.” Lance sighs, sinking to the ground.

“I know I just….”

“What?” Pidge sits next to him. Lance frowns, seeming conflicted.

“I just know how shaken up I was after the first challenge and how answering their questions made it worse and… you didn’t see him down there, Pidge.” Pidge sighs.

“Keith will be fine. If he’s not I’m sure he’ll deck her.” Lance laughs a little.

“Yeah.” Lance looks down into his lap, his features soft.

“Hunk was right, you got it bad.”

“What?!” Lance says, jumping. “I swear if Hunk told you–” Pidge rolled her eyes.

“It’s obvious Lance. He didn’t need to tell me anything.” Lance threads his fingers through his hair, sighing.

“It is?”

“The only person that doesn’t seem to know is Keith.” Lance huffs, resting his chin on his hand.

“What should I do, Pidge?” Pidge coughs.

“Are you seriously asking me for relationship advice?” Lance glares.

“Just ask him to the Yule Ball or something. That’s coming up soon.” Lance chews his lip.

“Maybe….” The door behind them opens, causing both of them to yelp, scrambling up. Keith frowned at them.

“Why were you sitting by the door?”

“It was Lance’s idea,” Pidge says with a shrug, heading into the room, closing the door tightly behind her. Lance starts to fidget with his jacket and Keith scratches his neck.

“So….” Keith says, coughing. Lance bites the inside of his cheek.

“Want to go find something to eat?” Keith grins.

“Sure.”

“Who’s Keith talking to?” Lance says, leaning into Hunk, a frown on his face. Hunk follows his line of sight.

“Acxa. Why?” Lance raises an eyebrow.

“Who’s she?”

“A Gryffindor girl. She’s friends with Allura’s ex. But don’t worry, she’s cool.” Lance chews his lip, glimpsing back at them. He knew what flirting looked like.

“Do you think she’ll ask him to the Yule Ball?” Hunk shrugs, taking a bite of his food.

“Pidge has heard rumors about it. They might be true.” Lance looks back at them. Keith has a frustratingly cute expression on his face as his brows draw with confusion, tilting his head curiously. Sometimes Lance swore he was like a puppy mixed with a cat and it made Lance’s stomach flip. He sighs, resting his chin on his hand.

“Wow. Pidge was right.” Lance squeaks, jumping and turning away from Keith.

“Right about what?” Lance says nervously.

“That that Durmstrang boy is going to be the death of you.”

“N-no he’s not!”

“Lance you’re looking at him again.” Lance sighs dreamily.

“He’s so pretty.” Hunk rolls his eyes.

“Tell me again why you haven’t asked him to the Yule Ball yet?” Lance huffs.

“Because Hunk.” Hunk raises an eyebrow.

“”Because… I don’t know. It would be weird, wouldn’t it?”

“No?”

“But it’s Keith, Hunk.” Hunk just laughs, shaking his head. Above them they hear a chirping sound. Everyone in the room cranes their heads up at the noise as dozens of birds flood the room, all of them with letters tied around their ankles. They swooped down, landing at tables where students recognized a family owl and took the letter, reading it to themselves with smiles and frowns. Another round of owls came in, dropping in the daily newspapers. Lance picks one up, casually flipping to the article on the Triwizard Tournament.

There’s a picture of the three of them, all drenched from head to toe. Pidge was grinning wildly, her eyes dancing with excitement. Meanwhile, Keith was shivering, wrapping himself tighter in blankets. Lance was beside him, looking slightly concerned for his friend as he offered Keith his blanket. Lance skipped over the picture to the article.

“Yesterday the three Champions of this year’s Triwizard Tournament completed their second challenge. Katie “Pidge” Holt from the Slytherin house at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry came in first place, saving her brother, Matt from the bottom of the lake. Next to come up was a bewildered muggle by the name of Veronica who is our second champion’s sister. However, Lance could not be seen, causing anxiety to build up within the stands of the arena, wondering what could possibly have happened to the Beauxbatons boy. There was still no sign of the Durmstrang boy or his treasure.

“Just as the officiators began to organize a team to look for the two boys, they shot out of the water, arm and arm, both of them holding tightly onto Takashi Shirogane, Keith Kogane’s adopted brother. The audience cheered, rising up in the stands as Keith and Lance tied for second place, causing a three way tie between the three champions. They were all–” Hunk kept poking Lance’s shoulder and it was really starting to dampen his reading ability. He huffs, getting slightly annoyed, and turns to Hunk.

“What?!” Hunk chews his lip.

“Uh dude…” Hunk points to a picture later on in the article. It was of before the match where Lance was helping Keith with his hair. They were facing each other, both of them blushing, looking soulfully into each other’s eyes. Lance gulps as he reads the headline.

“Rivals… or Star-Crossed Lovers?” Lance looks over at Hunk, a nervous expression on his face. He quickly turns back to the article, pratically inhaling the words on the page with a frantic energy.

“One cannot deny that since the first trial in the tournament there has been a spark between the two boys of Durmstrang and Beauxbatons. As some may recall, Keith Kogane came to Lance Mcclain’s aid when he couldn’t muster the courage to face his greatest fear. Since then, the two boys have been almost inseparable. Sources say that it was because Mcclain felt indebted to Kogane after he saved him and was bent on helping the Durmstrang in any way he could.

“But one cannot deny the energy these boys give off. Hidden deep within there is a passion that most anyone can see, and it has only been strengthened since the second trial. The two boys have become a popular… so to say… ship amongst fanatics of the Triwizard Tournament. And they no doubt are gobbling up this exclusive interview with Lance Mcclain:”

“Whatcha reading?” Keith says from over Lance’s shoulder, scaring Lance senseless. Without hesitation, Lance takes the article and shoves it in his glass of milk, looking up at Keith.

“Just enjoying my breakfast!” He says, laughing nervously. Keith squints at him, sitting down beside him. He reaches for the pitches of orange juice, his hand brushing Lance’s in the process. Lance goes bright red.

“Okay but seriously, what were you reading?” Keith says, staring at him from over his orange juice.

“Nothing.” Keith frowns. Lance can feel everyone looking at him now. They no doubt read the article, read about all the embarising ways Lance gushed about Keith during his interview in ways he didn’t mean to. If he could do anything to change that moment, he would in a heartbeat.

“What did Acxa talk to you about?” Hunk asks, bless him. Keith shrugs, stabbing his egg and frowning.

“She asked me to go to the Yule Ball with her.” Oh no oh no my life is over I failed bury me now–

“What did you say?” Hunk says, looking at Lance nervously. He could tell that Lance seemed on the verge of a breakdown. He made a mental note of the best escape route for his friend.

Keith continues to frown, stabbing his eggs, looking at Lance through his lashes.

“I said no,” Keith mumbles. Lance gasps, standing up.

“You what?” Keith seems to shrink in on himself a little, thrown off by Lance’s outbreak. Lance immediately feels horrible as he sits back down.

“Sorry, sorry I… what do you mean you said no?” He says in a much gentler voice, leaning slightly towards Keith. Keith shrugs, holding his gaze.

“I just… said no?”

“But she’s so your type!” Keith almost snorts. In fact he does… a little.

“I just…” Keith pushes his bangs out of his eyes, not meeting Lance’s gaze.

“I was just hoping someone else would ask me,” He says, a bright blush spreading across his cheeks. Lance gapes at him.

“Who is it?” he says, a little too quickly. Keith chews his lip.

“C’mon you can tell me.” Lance says, smiling and bumping his shoulder with Lance’s. Keith blushes, smiling a little.

“You’re going to have to wait, loverboy.” Lance’s heart pounds in his chest and in that moment, he wants to do nothing more than kiss Keith and tell him how he feels. But, the mullet boy’s heart is taken by another.

“You coming with me to Charms?” Keith says, gathering his stuff to get going. Lance smirks.

“How else can I beat you into a pulp with my fancy spellwork.” Keith laughs a snorty kind of laughter that makes Lance’s heart flutter.

It was a day before the Yule Ball and Lance still hasn’t asked Keith to go with him.

At this point Lance wasn’t sure why he was worried. Everyone Keith hung out with seemed to have a date, so it wasn’t like one of them could be Keith’s-mysterious-crush-that-he-was-hoping-would-ask-him. But Lance still couldn’t help but feel a lump in his throat every time he tried to ask Keith to go with him.

In the end, he said it the night before the actual dance and made a complete and entire fool of himself.

They were up in Keith’s dorm, lying next to each other on his bed with books propped open, their eyelids drooping.

“Why did your professor assign you a test on the day of the dance anyway?” Lance says with a yawn. Keith sighs, face planting into a textbook.

“Because my potions teacher enjoys watching me suffer.” Lance sighs, pulling the textbook away from Keith, who pulled his head up in surprise, turning to Lance. Only when Lance put away the textbooks did Lance realize their noses were almost touching.

“What are you doing?” Keith says, looking confused. Lance huffs.

“You’re way too tired for this and we have the Yule Ball tomorrow you need to get some sleep.” Keith groans, rubbing his eyes and sitting up. Lance does the same.

“Do you have a date to the ball yet?” he asks curiously. Lance feels his heart pound in his chest, wondering if this was the moment. He takes a deep breath, telling himself to chill out. He leans back, relaxed.

“No. All the girls are too shy to ask this guy,” he says cheesily, pointing finger guns at Keith. It was a lie, a bunch of girls asked him, but he said he had his heart set on someone else. And he did, if he would just work up the courage to ask the boy in front of him. He just needed to say those eight words. Will you go to the dance with me?

“What about you? That lucky lady ask you yet?” Keith frowns, playing with a loose string on the bed.

“No.” Lance tapped his fingers against his leg.

“Great. So neither of us have dates.”

“I guess…” Lance laughs.

“God that’s going to be so embarrassing.” Keith furrows his brow, confused.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean we’re the champions and we don’t have dates.” Keith doesn’t look at him as he continues to mess with the blanket.

“So?” Lance chews his bottom lip, his face heating. God, how is he supposed to say this? Its a good think Keith is distracted.

“So I mean… It will be kind of embarrassing… won’t it? Being the center of attention without a date?” Keith shrugs. Lance knows that Keith probably doesn’t care, but he needs an excuse, something to hide under if Keith lashes out at him.

“What are you saying, Lance?” Keith says, looking tired. Man, he should really go to sleep. Lance threads and unthreads his fingers together.

“Well you know… maybe we can both go together? Since we don’t have dates…” Keith was suddenly wide awake now. His eyes fly open as he turns to Lance, who’s trying to hide his blush. Did he just…. was he playing a trick on him? Keith drew his brows together. Lance started to panic.

“Is this some sort of joke?” Keith murmured, not looking into Lance’s eyes. Lance scrambled up, his heart pounding.

“Sorry I’m sorry Keith I….” he starts to grab his bags, running his fingers through his hair, getting that look in his eye. It was the same look he had in the arena when facing the bogart. Keith wanted to reach out but he was too frozen. His heart was pounding, Lance’s words ringing in his ears.

“I shouldn’t have…” Lance was rambling like he did when he was upset. It was funny how much they’ve gotten to know each other within the span of this competition and Keith wanted nothing more than to go to that dance with Lance Mcclain.

But by the time he finally opened his mouth to tell him yes, yes I want to go to the dance with you, Lance was rushing out the door, rubbing tears from his eyes. Keith stood up to chase after him, opening the door and running down the stairs into his common room. He emerged into the hall, but by that point, Lance was gone and all of Keith’s opportunities went down the drain.

“HaveyouseenLance?” Keith said the next morning to Hunk and Pidge, completely ignoring the other three girls sitting at the table. They seemed startled by his appearance, but Keith didn’t care. He didn’t sleep at all the night before and every time he laid down he tossed and turned. Eventually he snuck out to try and find Lance, but he ended up getting caught and sent back to his dorm.

“Wow Keith so polite of you to say hi to our friends Allura, Shay, and Romelle,” Pidge says sarcastically. Keith glares.

“Where’s Lance?” Hunk raises an eyebrow.

“He’s not with you?”

“Why would he be with me!” Keith runs his hands through his hair, sitting down.

“You guys were studying together last night where did he go after that?” Keith whimpers.

“I don’t know. He stormed off and–”

“Wait. He stormed off?” one of the girls, Allura, pitches in. Keith nods worriedly.

“Dude what did you do?” Pidge says. Keith buries his head in his arms.

“He asked me to the Yule Ball.” Everyone at the table gasps.

“Keith I swear if you said no–”

“I didn’t say anything but he started freaking out and I just…” Everyone is leaning close to him.

“Did you tell him?” Pidge asks. Keith shakes his head.

“I thought it was a joke! I didn’t think he would actually ask me!” Pidge shakes her head sadly.

“Do you ever read the Daily Prophet?” Romelle says. Keith looks up at her, an angry look on his face. Pidge shoves a paper in his face. He looks down at the article.

There’s a big picture of him and Lance, standing close together just before the second challenge. The headline read, “Rivals… or Star-Crossed Lovers?” Keith raised an eyebrow.

“What’s this?”

“Lance’s interview. You haven’t seen it?” Keith shakes his head, starting to read intently.

“R: So Mcclain, would you care to explain to us what happened in this round of competition?

L: Well, this part of the competition was always meant to help repay Kogane for helping me in… the first challenge. I felt bad and I wanted to help him as much as I could so we worked together to create our potions to help us. We started swimming up together, but I noticed that Keith was no longer next to me.

R: So you gave up a win to help him?

L: Yes.

R: Why?

L: I… well I don’t know. It only seemed fair considering he lost a significant amount of points for helping me.

R: You still could’ve swam for the surface and got him help. You didn’t have to be his knight in shinning armor. So why did you save him yourself?

L: I didn’t think of that….

R: No, you didn’t.

R: Would you have done it differently?

L: No. I would’ve risked everything to save him– I mean, I don’t want to see a fellow competitor get hurt. He would’ve drowned.

R: I see… and what are your opinions of Keith? You two have gotten extremely close during this competition.

L: We have. Keith has been amazing, the kind of friend I never knew I needed. He’s a bit temperamental, but once you get through his shell he has so many admirable traits and he’s so handsome….

R: Would you ever see Kogane as more than a friend?

L: Ye–NO! NO not at all that’s not what this is. We’re just friends, sometimes rivals. We would never– he would never– we don’t like each other in that way

R: Maybe he doesn’t, but how about you, Mcclain?

L: *no comment*”

“This isn’t real this had to have been forged. Lance would never say this.”

“He saw the article and tried to burn every copy of the Daily Prophet so you wouldn’t see it.” Keith frowns.

“Because it makes him look bad.” Pidge rolls her eyes.

“You need to go talk to Lance.”

“I don’t know where he is.” Pidge huffs.

“C’mon.”

Keith knocked tentatively on the door Pidge said was Lance’s. They had a little house set up with rooms for each of the students and Keith was sure he was going to get lost, but Pidge managed to find their way.

“Yes?” A voice called, cracking towards the end of the word. Keith felt his heart splinter. He was aware of some people around him whispering about his appearance saying things like “the Durmstrang boy” and “Lance” and “Klance.” He ignored them.

“It’s Keith,” Keith says. Keith hears sniffles from inside.

“Can I come in?” There’s no answer. Keith takes a deep breath, opening the door.

The room was actually really neat. So neat that it made Keith felt bad about the times he brought Lance into his dorm which was utter chaos. But everything seemed to have a place, down to the pencils on the desk.

“Wow your room is so neat…” Lance rubs his eyes. They’re red and puffy.

“I organize when I’m upset…” Keith walks over to Lance’s bed, sitting next to him. Lance pulls his knees to his chest. Keith bites his lip, trying to figure out what to say.

“You look tired,” Lance says, frowning. Keith yawns.

“Maybe I didn’t sleep.” Lance looks appalled.

“Keith! You need to take care of yourself! You have a test today that’s it your skipping first and second block.” Keith smiled a little.

“What about you, Lance?” he says softly. Lance seems a bit surprised.

“What about me?” Keith frowns.

“Look Lance about last night–” Lance presses a finger to Keith’s lips. Keith looks at him with surprise.

“Keith look. I shouldn’t have asked it just made things awkward I’m sorry.”

“Lance listen to me–”

“Keith you don’t need to apologize. I understand you don’t feel the same way.” Keith grabs Lance’s hands, twining his fingers through Lance’s, his face red.

“Look I… I’m glad you asked.” Lance searches Keith’s face, looking confused. Keith shies away from him, seeming super flustered,

“Keith what–” Keith looks up at him.

“I said no to Acxa because I was waiting for you to ask me.” Lance gapes at him.

“No.. Keith just… Please don’t do this to make me feel better that’s so much worse–”

“Lance I’m not–”

“Keith really its okay if you don’t like me–” Keith has never been good with words. He knew that there was no way to tell Lance the way he felt. So he fists his hands in Lance’s shirt, pulling him close. He hesitates for a moment, their lips centimeters apart. Then, Keith kisses him.

Lance pulls away, a surprised look on his face. Keith looks at him with those eyes, those purple eyes with unreadable emotions that Lance finally understands. He kisses Keith again, his heart pounding, not sure if this was real and not caring.

When they break they look at each other for a long moment… then burst out into giggles, laying down on the bed, Keith’s legs hanging off the end and Lance’s propped against the wall. Lance looks back at Keith and Keith looks back at Lance, both of them smiling.

“So…” Keith says, grinning dorkily. Lance loved that grin. “Wanna go to the Yule Ball with me?”

Allura helped Lance get ready for the dance because, well, he was a bi disaster.

“Do you think he’ll like it?” Lance says, frowning down at his suit. Allura rolls her eyes.

“You know blue looks good on you Lance. It matches your eyes.” Lance huffs.

“I know I just… I want to make a good impression. This is our first… I guess date?” Allura just smiles.

“That boy is over the moon for you. I’m sure you could wear a trash bag and he would think your the hottest guy in the room.”

“Do I look good, Lura?” Lance says for the last time with a sigh. She smiles.

“Yes Lance, you look great.”

“Shiro where’s my tieeeeee.” Keith groans, running his hands through his hair. His outfit was almost complete, he just needed find his freaking tie.

Shiro decided that it would be a good idea to help Keith get ready for the Yule Ball for unknown reasons. He kept going on and on about how him and his boyfriend, Adam, met at a school event similar to this one. He was such a romantic it made Keith gag, although he wasn’t any better. He kept stressing, trying to make everything perfect.

“Keith. You’re wearing your tie,” Shiro says with a bored expression. Keith looks down.

“Oh.”

“You okay?” Keith bites his lip.

“What if he decides he doesn’t like me?”

“He’s not going to do that Keith.”

“What if he backs out? What if I get stood up?”

“Keith calm down.”

“What if–” Shiro grabs his shoulders.

“Lance fell in love with you, he wants to go to this dance with you.” Keith huffs.

“Alright…” Shrio smiles.

“Just be yourself. He loves that.” Keith sighs and nods.

“Do I look okay?”

“You look perfect.

As instructed, Lance, Keith, and Pidge arrived early to go over the procedures for how they were to handle the Yule Ball. They arrived at their given time, much to to the headmasters surprise. He frowned when he saw them.

“No one got dates?” Lance coughs.

“Uh we’re together….” He takes Keith’s hand. The headmaster smiles a bit.

“My brother said he’ll dance with me.”

“Okay then. I trust you all know how this works?” Pidge nods, Keith and Lance shake their heads. He takes a deep breath.

“It is tradition that the Champions walk out once everyone has settled and do the first dance.” Keith stiffens.

“Something wrong?” Lance whispers, his brows drawn in concern.

“I can’t dance,” Keith says nervously. Lance laughs.

“No one can.” Keith pouts. They go over a few more things. People start to trickle in, mingling amongst themselves.

“You know… you look amazing tonight,” Lance says, playing with Keith’s ponytail as they wait for their cue. Keith blushes brightly.

“S-so do you!” he says defensively. Lance laughs.

“Thank you.” Keith wraps his arm around Lance, snuggling close to him. Lance felt his heart thud in his chest.

“I bet I can dance better than you,” Keith mumbles. Lance snorts.

“You’re on Kogane.”

Lance felt like he was flying. Everything about the night was perfect, and it didn’t matter that he was about to face the third trial soon. All that matters was he was sitting here, in the warm and inviting dorm of Keith Kogane, explaining what a cell phone was and how Keith needed to get one immediately. Keith seemed confused.

“Where do the messages go?” Lance laughs.

“They come to me, silly.” Keith gets that adorable, quizzical expression on his face.

“But how do they get there?”

“You’re questioning actual muggle technology proven with science but not the entirety of magic.” Keith shrugs.

“I’ve always lived around magic. I guess I never thought about it.” Lance sighs, leaning against Keith.

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For just… being the most amazing person I ever met.” Keith turns to Lance, a flustered smile on his face.

“It’s only fair. You’re the most extraordinary person I ever met.” Lance blushes, burying his face in Keith’s shoulder.

“Keiiithhhhh who taught you how to flirt?” Keith laughs.

“If I recall, you did. When trying to help me get the guy I was holding out on to take me to the dance. Which was you.”

“I do recall that…”

“Remember that time I made you blush so hard you had to physically walk out of the room?”

“IN MY DEFENSE– I was not prepared for you to be that good.” Keith laughs softly.

“I just can’t believe you didn’t figure out that I liked you.” Lance huffs.

“To be fair, you didn’t figure it out either even when it was all in a nice interview tied with a bow.”

“You got me there.”

THE END

#klance #keith kogane #lance mcclain #voltron #vld #voltron legendary defender #keith x lance #lance x keith #laith #candy writes #klancemonth2018 #hogwarts au #klance hogwarts au

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oneangstbal-blog · 6 years ago

Text

Bad for the heart

story one

It's not fair. It was defintly not fair. Lance can just can't get cocky and pretend nothing happen. Lance was a fuckin criminal. The biggest in the state to be exact. Keith had no idea why he signed up to be in this hell hole. But he always came back to see the blue eyed cuban guy who wears that same shit eating grin everytime he looks at Keith. This was very bad for the heart. Espically Keith's. **** Keith had learnes that Lance wasn't bad as he seems to be. He knows this because the usual talks they always have. Keith tried very hard to ignore the stares and winks Lance sent his way. But it couldn't stop the rapid beat of his heart and the slight blush Keitb would feel. And Lance just happens to rub it in.

The converstations had started a while back. He had enough of Lance's small teases he would make. He had wonderly followed Lance to a fence during thise times where all the inmates would go out. Keith always hated that. He hated nature so he always stayed in.

Keith had followed Lance to a small corner where the guard towers weren't able to see. Keith's curisoisity had gotten the better of him as he followed Lance deeper. From what Keith had heard Lance had been in more than one massive bank robberis and never been caught. But he turned himself in. Keith still found it strange.

Keith was so deep in thought he ran into something solid. He looked up to see those blue eyes boring into him. "Were you following me?" Lance said with a small smile. Shit. Shit. Shit. "Uhh. No?" Keith says quickly, backing away. Lance just smirks and leans in closer untill their noses are touching.

"Tsk tsk. Don't follow me. I'm just trouble." And with a wink he walks back the way he came from leaving Keith in a confused state.

The second time Keith followed Lance it had been a little more less appealing. Lance had stopped and turned around, thoese eye being more darker and scarier. "Oh officer Keith. You're just looking for trouble aren't you? You shoukd stay away. I'm warning you."

This time Lance just stood aganist the wall like he was waiting for Keith. And his eyes seemed to shine like normal. Keith hadnt seen Lance that time he swore he heard a crack when his face connected with Lance's rock hard chest. "What do you want from me Keith?" Lance said pinching the bridge if his nose.

Keith just stood silent like an idot. Lance sighed giving him that shit eating grin. "Please. Stay away." Lance pats Keith head ruffling his hair and walks away. That was the last time he saw Lance. He escaped that same day.

It had been three weeks since Lance's great escape. And Keith always found himself thinking about his blue eyes and that shit eating grin. Keith knew it was impossible to wish he would see Lance again. But was to hard to hope? ........... A month passed and Keith hadn't gotten a wink of sleep. He turned around but found himself staring at a pair of blue eyes. Keith screamed and rolled off the bed. "Shit. Sorry. Are you ok?" "L-L-Lance!!??" Keith oggoles, "How did you..." "I picked your door locked." Lance shrugs.

Keith stares up at Lance. Did he get more buffer? Keith just groans and flops back down on the floor. "How did you find me?" Keith asks. He hears footsteps come near him and Lance's blue eyes are staring down at him, that same god fuckin shit eating grin on his face. "Didn't you miss me?" Lance says.

Keith rolls his eyes but that dosen't stop the sudden rapid beat of his heart. Lance just smiles those eye glowing in the dim room. "Lance what are you doing hear?" Lance sighs the smile dissapearing from his face. "Look, I just need a place to stay for a while you were my only option when I saw you."

Keith blinks. This is bad. Really bad. Lance is a run away criminal. What would happen if he gets caught. This really isn't fair. * A few days pass and Lance was still staying with Keith. Although he would randomly disappear and come back at unforgivable hours of the night giving Keith a heart attack. Keith was still working at the prison Lance escaped from. Keith often found himself wondering off. Why would Lance just turn himself to just escape again.

Keith flops on his bed tired. Lance gone. Again. He never wondered where Lance went. It just never crossed his mind. What does a criminal do anyway?

Keith wakes with a jolt hearing the doorknob rattle "Lance?" Keith calls out as the door swings open. He looks cursiouly at the door, and in stummbles Lance. Keith nearly faints at the sight of Lance. "WHAT THE FUCK HAPPEN!" Keith shrieks at Lance.

Lance looks at Keith with his grin. Lance seemed to limp his face coverd in brusies with his right eye swollen a busted lip and bloody nose. "What the bloody hell Lance." Lance just smiles staggering towards Keith and wrapping his arms around Keith. "Ahh, Keithy." Lance giggles. Keith smacks Lance. "Hehe, sorry,"

Keith wrinkles his nose when he smells Lance reek of beer. "Lance are you drunk?" "Noooo." Lance slurs, "I had had..." Lance tries to count on his fingers but it just turns to a fit of giggles. "Alright. Into the shower you go." Keith drags Lance to the small bathroom and plobs him on the toliet seat to clean up his face.

Lance slumps down on the seat watching Keith. "Lance what happen." Keith says pressing a wad of cottonn aganist his nose to get the dried blood off. Lance coming back to his senses half mumbles the story to Keith. "Thugs. Cops. Ambush. I won."

Keith finishes patching Lance up and turns on the shower. "You shower and I'll find some clean clothes." Lance nods slipping his shirt off. Keith turns away quickly, face red. Shit he's built. Keith can sense that shit eatting grin on Lance's face. "Like what you see Keithy," Lance mocks. Keith turns to look at lance but comes face to face with Lance, their noses touching.

Keith feels his face burn up as Lance tilts his head, steam coming from the hot shower. "Lance," Their lips brush. Keith felt a rush of emotion fot those 5 long seconds their lips were touching. Lance's blue eyes twinkled, but with something described as sadness. Keith sucks up a deep breath and plants his lips back on Lance. Lance wraps his arms aroud Keith hips, his tongue slipping in Keith's mouth. They pull apart breathing hard. "Take a shower," Keith grummbles. Lance gives Keith his signiture grin,"yes, sir." ........... A week passed, when Keith arrives he is greated with a kiss. Keith dosent know what to call their cruent relationship. They havent gone fruther then intense make outs. Lance still came at unforgiving hours, but a kiss was all it took to get Lance off the hook

But today...something was wrong. Keith walked through his door. No Kiss. No hug. No...Lance. Lance's jacket is not hung up where it is. Those werid sunglasess Lance would keep next to a picture of Keith and Shiro is gone. Keith hearts slowly starts to crack in two. He sees a small paper lying next to the bed.

I told you I was trouble. I'm sorry. -Love Lance.

Plop. Plop Tear drops fall on the note. Keith's broken cry falls as his door bangs opens. "Keith!" Shiro voice is heard as other footsteps march in. "Fuck. He's gone."

Keith dosent hear he just sobs in Shiro's arms ignoring the question ponited his way. He just crys. Crys his heart out. Lance was really bad for the heart. ......... He watches as the police burts in the small room. He hears the broken crys come from the man he left. He watches as they leave. He waits. Lance was always good at waiting.

He watches as Keith clutches the note to his chest he watches as Keith cries himself to sleep. Lance goes to the door picking the lock and going in. He watches the gentle raise and fall of Keith's chest. He wipes the dried up tears. Lance plants a soft kiss on Keith's forehead. He turns around and walks out. He leaves. Not looking back.

(oof. hope you liked. im new. so like. please like. I write these so ill post some from my wattpad

#klance #angst #klangst

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pinkykitten · 5 years ago

Text

Come Back to You

Marvel

Stephen Strange x wizard! female reader

Warning: death, suicidal thoughts, depression, just a lot of angst but dont worry it gets fluffy, violence, curse words

Specifics: angst, romance, fluff, action, one-shot, race neutral reader, gif, !SPOILERS FOR ENDGAME!

People: stephen strange, steve rogers, tony stark, natasha romanoff, scott lang, thanos

Words: 2,147

Requested: By @abigator554 Hey could u do a dr strange x reader where she watched him fade away on titan and thought she would never see him again. she is also a “wizard” and fights in the last battle fighting as if she has nothing left loose. When all of them start to come back she sees him and runs over to him. She starts to break down ending with some really sappy stuff from Stephen and then they take down Thanos together

Authors Note: so this guys is a sad one indeed god i feel like this whole week has been sad. this story deals and talks about a lot and to me a lot of what u would go thru if someone u loved passed away without a why. if you havent watched endgame then maybe this isnt the fic for u, if u dont care about spoilers then go on ahead. thanks for the request and i always love writing about those who dont get written a lot. also this gif 😍 i mean cmon!

Its been 5 years. 5 years since your life turned upside down and was changed for the worse, but it just felt like yesterday.

You stood there, awaiting for what came next, holding tightly Stephen’s hand. “Stephen...”

Suddenly, without control, your colleges, your friends started disappearing on planet Titan. It all happened so fast. You tried to stop it, but it was out of your hands. “No, no, no,” you were shocked, tears streaming down your face as you saw the ones you loved die, just poof away.

You then remembered your husband. Turning your head to Stephen your world fell apart. He fell, leaning against a rock. “Oh god no,” you sobbed not wanting him to leave you. You needed him, he was your life. “Baby, no don’t leave me,” you pleaded, kneeling before him, clutching his once strong hands now going weak.

“I’m sorry y/n, I’m sorry,” he only whispered, feeling life soon leaving his body. “I’m sorry, I...we all tried. There was nothing more we could do.” He tried gripping your hand, granting you one last kiss on your knuckles. You could feel the splash of tears drop onto your skin feeling worse knowing he was crying, knowing he didn’t want to leave you. “I love you...”

He was gone.

The wind took his ashes away, leaving you with only a little piece of himself. Your lips trembled, you were shaking out of anger and sadness. You picked up a pile of his ashes in your hand and dropped them again to the ground. You looked up to the sky and screamed. Screamed on the top of your lungs. For once being and Avenger didn’t matter for you were powerless.

Sitting up in your bed full of sweat you look beside you. Hoping Stephen is there and it was all a nightmare. As you look you realize it was all a reality. He was truly gone. Again, everyday, you would sob. Either sob the whole night or sob till you fell asleep. You wrapped yourself up in one of his shirts, smelling it and just wishing for his presence, he was with you. “I miss you my love.” You would hug yourself with his shirt on.

You were alone in the house. You felt broken and just not wanting to live anymore. Sometimes, what was left of the gang, would come visit you but most days you wanted to stay in bed and hope and pray that you would die.

A knock on the door startled you. You still laid there not wanting any confrontation.

“Y/n, I know you’re in there,” Steve called out to you.

You groaned as you got up. You were wearing pajamas from who knows when. You hadn’t taken a shower, you were a mess. The house was a disaster and you were feeling very weak at the moment.

You opened the door lightly, “what do you want?” Usually, your cheery self or the you from five years ago would of said something sarcastic or something silly to Steve but that you had disappeared, along with the love of your life.

Steve looked worried, seeing as you had bags under your eyes and you looked almost lifeless, well you felt it. “Please, can I come in?”

You bit your lip in thought, thinking.

“Please, y/n, can we just talk?”

You nodded, opening the door wide for him. He looked around the house that was so lively with music playing and you and Stephen dancing together, cooking, you would invite the Avengers for dinners all the time but now the house was dark, curtains closing the sunshine. It was better that way, outside people experienced the same things. Loss of loved ones. Half of the population was wiped out from that snap so outside was dark and gloomy, like everyone's souls. Garbage, clothes, his clothes were every where, lying around the house, bills and letters were all stacked into one corner.

“Please, sit,” you said as you pointed to the kitchen table. It was all covered in junk. You quickly moved everything aside with force, not caring about a glass vase shattering. You just did not care about anything.

“Thank you,” Steve sat politely.

“Would you like some, um,” you went to the kitchen and saw you had no groceries, “water?”

“I’m good thanks.”

You walked back and sat in front of Steve, not knowing what to talk about but you knew what you didn’t want to talk about. Steve and Natasha and some of the group were dead set on bringing those who were snapped back. You just never wanted to talk about it. You didn’t want to bring your hopes up and then when it failed be down all over again. Even seeing their faces brought back your husband in your mind, old times.

“How are you feeling?”

You chuckled, “the same...”

“Listen y/n, I know you miss him-”

“No don’t you start with that,” you shook your head.

“-but you can’t keep living like this.” Steve wrapped your hands into his, engulfing them. He then realized you were wearing Stephen’s shirt. “He wouldn’t have wanted this for you.” You brought your hands back as if Steve stung your hands. You hated talking about him.

“Oh what the he*l do you know, Steve? I can and I will keep living like this. You know I kinda have the right to. Everybody, everybody is wanting me to take care of myself, to just live on, well what if I don’t want to! I never wanted to proceed in living without Step- without him...”

Steve felt pain for you, but he didn’t want nothing bad happening to you either. “Y/n, this has got to stop.”

“I can’t even say his name. I can’t leave the house without thinking about him. I don’t want to breathe, eat, sleep, do anything without him. I won’t. You all expect me, oh its been 5 years, well to me it feels like it was yesterday, you guys expect me to be happy again, to find a hobby, do something amazing with my life, I can’t! For god’s sake that was my husband. He wasn’t just a man that I wanted to pass and we’re done, he was like my other half! I could depend on him and he could depend on me and I failed him.” You slouched in your chair sobbing. Steve wrapped his arms around you, “no don’t think that way. This wasn’t your fault.”

“I wish it would of been me instead of him. Steve, I have a baby room and baby clothes, things. We were gonna try. I was so happy, finally having our little family like I always dreamed of and now, its not a dream, its a nightmare. A nightmare that I am supposedly supposed to keep living. Steve, I don’t want to live anymore! I don’t want this life! I just want it all to end!”

Steve soothed you as he embraced you harder and for as long as you needed him. You cried onto his shoulder, needing that comfort.

He stayed for the rest of the day there. Just having another person’s presence surprisingly aided you, but sadly he had to leave. You said your goodbyes as he left but he paused, “y/n if you ever need me for anything or just need someone there, someone to talk to, please, don’t ever hesitate to call me. Please.” He almost sounded as if he was begging. You, again, hugged him, “thank you Steve.”

A couple of days later you got the call.

You brought all your items together. Notebooks your husband told you about that were very important. They were about the stones, especially the one he gave up. It was all nostalgic. You remember Stephen he was your teacher. He taught you everything about magic and alternate dimensions. Grinning as you saw a picture you threw of him and you along with his old things, “don’t worry baby, we might get somewhere.” You got yourself ready and ran as fast as you could to the Avengers facility.

The call was from Steve, he said they might have found a way to bring back all those people.

You were so quick, so fast. Could this be real? Could this be possible? Could you really end up seeing your husband again?

You ran, everything disheveled as you entered. Slamming the door open, “tell me!”

They explained to you everything calling the plan the “Time Heist”. Scott Lang said he had experienced the Quantum Realm so he had knowledge about it. He told you that it may help them go back in time and retrieving all the Infinity Stones from major historical events. It all made sense. The lost pieces you were trying to stick into the puzzle piece were found.

“So you’re telling me this time voodoo whatever might actually work?” Scott placed his hands on your shoulders chuckling, excited, “that is what I’m saying y/n. We may be able to bring back all of them.”

Feeling light headed you sat down. Your mind was racing. Its been so many years. All this time you imagined there was never a possibility of seeing Stephen again and now you were told it might actually happen.

“Y/n are you okay?” Tony asked concerned.

Tears started to drip down your cheeks and you bit your fist, “we need to do this...”

Fighting alongside the Avengers trio leaving behind the feelings of lost from your friend Natasha you head straight for Thanos.

Using your powers you lift him up and smash him against stones.

“Guys were losing!” You shouted as you suddenly saw the army of Thanos storming toward you four. You held your breath as you were ready to defend humanity, ready to fight till your last breath. Until you heard a voice on Steve’s ear piece. You turned around, shocked, “could it be...”

All of a sudden Sling Ring portals start opening and one by one people that have been affected by the Snap appear.

“Oh my god, Steve!” You start laughing. Your hand atop your mouth so surprised. “It worked! It worked!” As you saw those you thought you had lost forever you remember that special someone. “Wait then that means...”

As the next portal opens up out comes you husband, Stephen.

You feel as if you are floating as you see him. Feeling his and your presence only in this terrifying war, in this world. Not caring about the battle that is about to begin you and Stephen make eye contact. You see a tear fall from his face as you pick up your cloak and sprint to him. You trip over your cape a couple of times but that does not stop you. As you get closer Stephen runs to you as well and the two of you embrace, you almost tripping him from the force. Stephen clutches onto your head as you rest your face into his chest, sobbing. “I thought I would never see you again. I missed you so much.”

“I know my love, I know,” he kissed your forehead as he rocked you back and forth. “I’m sorry for all the pain that I’ve caused you.”

You held onto him tighter, afraid of letting go. “It doesn’t matter anymore. All that matters is that you are here with me.” You felt a tear press against your cheek and you realized it was not yours it was Stephen. You backed away and looked directly at his face. Opening his tear filled eyes, the portals light gleaming against his orbs, he sniffles as he smiles, “...my love...”

You touch his cheeks lightly and bring your forehead against his, “we are one again Stephen.” You two share a kiss that was so passionate and full of love. All those days and nights crying alone were days of the past. You now looked forward to your future. A future with your husband.

(not mine! do not own!)

You had a grip onto his clothing and you two giggled after the kiss just enjoying each others company. “I love you Mr. Strange.”

“And I love you more Mrs. Strange.”

You two held hands as you all prepared for battle. As husband and wife, the power couple you and Stephen kicked some a*s as you fought for not your life but your husband’s. Vowing that you would never let anything ever happen again to him.

A life was lost that day. Everyone mourned the loss of Tony and previously Natasha. It was tough, they were everyone's friend. You thanked everyone for the sacrifices they made, without them you wouldn’t be able to have your husband beside you.

But just as a life was lost another life was born. You sat upon Stephen’s lap as you uttered only a few words that would completely change your lives, “guess what Stephen...I’m pregnant.”

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