#but i have no idea what. is it too early to see each other irl? idk
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how am I supposed to talk to girls I hate it here
#there's this one girl i matched on bumble last month#we've been talking and i have no idea how to follow up#i'm always the one asking stuff so two days ago i only answered her answer and didn't ask to see if she did anything#but nothing has happened. i will talk to her now#but i have no idea what. is it too early to see each other irl? idk#i was thinking about asking her about the chinese new year (she's chinese)#but that's a month away is that weird to ask#i genuinelly need help all kinds are welcome
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⋮ ♯; ⤷ hypnotized .ᐟ
i can't escape you, i'm hypnotized ―୨୧⋆˚
dan heng x fem!reader; smut, fluff, no plot; first time, emotional, awkward, a bit vanilla(?); multiple rounds, multiple orgasms, missionary, cowgirl; needy & whiney dan heng agenda; unprotected sex (but wrap it up irl); praise, marking, pet names, groping and touching and in general lots of smooching; overstimulation if you squint;
wc: 4.4k
a/n: hello on a new acc and idk what else to say except prepare for lots of nasty thoughts in the future. peace out. and quick taglist: @kuniihoonii @hoonieswhore (sorry if you didn't want to, I thought you'd like some more dan heng content by yours truly)
the night isn't so early, but it's not extremely late either; or at least you think so, since it's kind of hard to tell time while traveling through space.
but despite that, you're not sleepy; it's actually surprising because you're laying on the pile of bedsheets dan heng calls his bed. granted, the pile is comfortable... sometimes too comfortable, but a proper mattress wouldn't hurt... especially wouldn't hurt his back. and yours, by the way.
prepped on your elbows, you're laying on your stomach with legs up in the air, wiggling them back and forth, while you read a random novel you found in the pits of the archives. you had no idea the bookshelves would contain normal books, let alone such a genre: erotica.
despite its lack of logic or laws of physics, the plot is surprisingly good... or at least good enough to kill the boredom that's washing over you. the silence, at first calming and comforting, soon became too loud, as loud as silence can get. especially when one misses their beloved.
sighing, you close the book and look around the room again. dimly lit, enough to read comfortably, seems... empty. well, no wonder why, because there's only you in there. but usually... usually, even at such hour, dan heng is back, rummaging through the piles of sacred and not texts, books, and other papers he sorts. even if he's quiet, no music is playing, it's still not complete silence. the sheets of paper sweetly swoosh over each other, the pen smoothly traces letters, and the overall atmosphere is... comforting. but without him, no matter how many books you'll go through just to make some noise, it's still empty.
"here you are..."
when dan heng sees you on his... so-called bed, he can't help but sigh in relief. something about seeing you so comfortable in his room makes his heart flutter, even if it's him who had to get comfortable with this. when he lets you in in his little cave, you're a part of it; it's not his room without you around.
"where else should i be?" you frown slightly, confused by his words, features softening the second you hear his melodic voice.
"in my arms, obviously."
you laugh in disbelief, not expecting such a cheesy line from him. but when you see how one corner of his lips curves millimeters up in a snug expression, you can guess he was taking lessons from march and caelus.
"then come here. i've been waiting for you..." you throw the book aside and roll on your side with open arms. that smile of yours, one who could fight the sun with its brightness and warmth, is enough for him to cave in.
but he stops when he notices the title of the book you were reading.
he averts his gaze immediately, but the way his ears redden tell you everything. it wasn't a book from the express's archives. it was from his own collection.
you say nothing; instead, you cuddle with dan heng, limbs tangled and bodies squeezed together in a tight embrace. the moment is serene for a second, with your bodies tangled together and warming each other, being vulnerable and protective at the same time. with closed eyes, both of you relish in this moment of silence; not the empty one, but loud, loud, and intense with all the feelings you two have for each other.
dan heng tries, he really does; he doesn't want to put silent pressure on you, so he bottles up all the need for you. it gets to the point where every single one of his nerves is on fire, every muscle gets tense, and his body gets really warm. warm to the point that even you can feel it.
"is it about that book?"
"what?" he's doomed. he's so over. he's so-
"i know it's a book from your collection. but i don't know why you read such stuff... do you gather intel for... our first time?"
your giggle is cute and innocent, but dan heng can't take it anymore. he's intoxicated by you, swooned over you... straight-up horny for you and he can't keep it in his pants any longer.
"yes." he breathes out, heart thumping in his chest like a ticking bomb. taking a deep breath doesn't help him one bit, and when you look at him with lustful sparkles in your big, lovely eyes while you speak... he feels physical pain.
"are you ready, then? i know i am."
apparently, dan heng wasn't the brightest one, because all the signs, all the teasing you treated him with, were not enough for him to notice. but now it's the time. and both of you know that.
maybe he is horny to the point where he's like a ticking bomb, but he's still a clueless gentleman. his lips clash with yours, intertwining in a slow yet passionate manner while he lays you down on the sheets. your hands cupping his face, the soft skin of your palms, and the sweet taste of your lips make dan heng breath even heavier, coming in ragged pants.
he wants you so bad; to taste you, explore you, praise and worship you, just like you deserve. dan heng never caught feelings that caliber for anyone but you, and this? this is testing his limits. he's so close to cumming in his pants at the mere thought of your naked body, and yet here he is, hands under your t-shirt, reaching for the hem to take it off. he's excited, he's needy, he's so eager; aeons, he loves you so much. and he wants to show you how much he loves you.
"d-dan heng... give me a second."
your voice rips him out of his thoughts. then he realizes your top is off; you're left in a bra and shorts, while he's still fully dressed. that is not fair, he thinks.
"i'll- i'll take mine off, too-" he trails off, reaching for the zippers, quickly getting out of the upper part of his clothing.
"that's not- that wasn't the matter, but- thank you nonetheless," you chuckle and breathe heavily, the sight of your boyfriend's torso, making you only more aroused. trying to reassure yourself, you smile at him softly, hesitating a little to say anything.
"i love you. i love you so much. you know that, right? there's no one else for me but you."
you almost tear up; it's the first time he said it out loud. he told you at the beginning that it's hard for him, and yet... here he is. vulnerable with his emotions, ready to be vulnerable with you.
dan heng is fully aware of how this moment affects you; how it must be hard to feel so... exposed after years of trying to cover up. yes, he's in literal pain still, but he's ready to take it slow and eventually fuck his fist rather than hurt you in any way.
the way his eyes glimmer in the dim light, how they sparkle and glow with nothing but love and devotion while he speaks... that's it. you know he's not lying. you know he's genuine with you, and that he's ready to sacrifice himself for you...
you unclasp your bra and put it aside, getting rid of your shorts too. and when he notices the confidence, love, and commitment, he unzips his pants in seconds.
"may i- kiss you again?" dan heng breathes out, looking you in the eyes and getting lost in them immediately. when you grab his face in your palms and kiss him with urgency he never felt from you, he gives in.
"touch me. everywhere you want, but not there, yet."
"your wish is my command, princess," he mutters back, kissing you again and moving one of his hands to your waist, caressing the soft skin and curves of your body.
you feel his leaking cock against your thigh and by aeons, is it intoxicating. the thoughts to jump on him and fuck him until you pass out are loud, but, surprisingly, you can compose yourself for now. just savor this moment, feel it, and prepare by the way, you say to yourself.
and aeons, do you feel things.
his hands, big yet calloused, touch you so gently, almost as if it's a little fluffy cloud tickling your skin. he continues to spread his warmth across your body, placing his hands everywhere he can; waist, hips, thighs, belly – you name it, he touches it. but he doesn't dare to even think about touching your pussy yet, even if he feels how wet it already is.
dan heng growls quietly, breaking the kiss and resting his forehead on yours with eyes closed, trying to compose himself again. it's hard, with his thoughts racing and spiraling down to his cock, he can't do this anymore, the battles persists and he's not the bravest soldier...
"dan heng? dan heng, can you look at-"
"no, i- i can't. i'm losing control already and- admiring your beauty like that is too much- i'll go to the bathroom and-"
"dan heng!"
the slight bonk you give his head with your hand gets him out of his thoughts, and he finally looks at you with the pain he's trying to suppress. you reassure him with a soft smile before continuing what you wanted to say.
"you can put it in... but slowly. you're- you're quite big and i'm not sure if it fits-"
"i'll make it fit, baby. it'll fit and it'll feel so good- but that's for another time."
the eagerness audible in his voice is adorable, making you chuckle and flustered. he kisses you lips again, exchanging saliva in such a needy and sloppy way. all you can do in such sudden moment is gasp and melt, letting his tongue explore your mouth.
you can feel how his cock is twitching in anticipation and need against your thigh, and the thought of finally feeling it inside makes you dizzy and wet; not in your wettest dreams you imagined his cock to be so... delightful.
"ready?" dan heng suddenly pulls away and breaks the kiss, looking into your eyes for consent. the way you stare at him with excitement, lust, and trust sends him into overdrive. he's not going bonkers thanks to the last thin strings of self-control.
"ready."
he almost drools and cums on the spot when he feels your dripping wet pussy. smearing the precum and your arousal over your entrance, dan heng lets out a few moans and whimpers; his cock is already so sensitive and the warmth of your folds inviting him almost make him cry.
"i love you so much, baby." he's mumbling into your ear while pushing his cock into your pussy, slowly but surely filling you up. the whimpers you two make mingle in the air, making a new sonata that's meant only for you, for this moment, never played again. this is it, this is the moment of pure bliss, where the usually closed heart of your boyfriend is pouring out all the love he has for you. only for you.
dan heng groans and whimpers in suffering, trying his best not to push himself all in at once. he breathes in and out, warm air getting out of his lungs is tickling your neck and ear, making you even more aroused.
"more."
he stops existing for a second, taking in your word. it's only one word and yet it's like a spark to the dynamite of need inside him.
"i need- more of you, you feel so- good," you start babbling, also getting lost in the pleasure. the soft yet demanding stare you give him says a lot; you're sure of what you say, you're sure what you want, and you're sure you want him.
"just a second, baby- i want to stretch you, not rip you in two."
the quiet whine you let out makes him whimper and throb inside you. he's so close to cumming, so close to giving it up... but he needs to wait a little more.
he can't do that when you suddenly cup his face and place a set of sloppy kisses all over his lips and jaw, whimpering and moaning softly.
you relax further, the reactions you get out of him with your little teasing are so cute that you can't help and giggle softly. rolling your hips a little, you help him push his cock further, slowly stretching you in such a delicious way.
"baby, no- i'm gonna-!"
dan heng tries to stop you and your greedy pussy, but he's helpless when his cock is hugged by your tight, velvety walls. with closed eyes, he shudders and rests his forehead on your forehead while he cums, his cock twitching and painting your inner walls already.
"fuck- i'm sorry, baby," he starts, his body still shaking as he speaks. "i couldn't help it- it won't happen again, i promise, baby-"
"you may think i'm crazy or twisted, but i find it hot."
his skin is warm under your palms as you soothe his shoulders and arms, trying to calm him down. with his head still resting on your shoulder, dan heng pants and tries to catch his breath, kissing your skin softly.
"it happens. it's normal and it's fine. i didn't mind it," you continue to comfort him, your soft fingertips brushing over his skin. your breathing is steady, heart beats only a little faster in the excitement as you want him to breathe with you. and he does after a short while, his thoughts also halting to a stop. "if you want, we can stop it here-"
"no. i want to make you feel so good like you never felt before- i want to fuck you so good that you'll get wet when thinking about it again."
such a bold statement makes your eyes widen in surprise, especially when you can hear how determined he is for it to happen. your breath gets stuck in your lungs as you try to pry your inner whore away.
"as long as- as you'll be careful and loving... then i don't- i don't mind."
a consensus has been made between your voice of reason and inner whore, both sides getting what they want; a good and sweet lovemaking session with the only man that there is for you.
dan heng chuckles and lifts his head, looking you in the eyes with undying devotion and utmost adoration as he seeks the confirmation in your stare. seeing your flushed skin, body shivering in anticipation, and lips slightly parted, he doesn't need to be told twice. placing a soft kiss on your forehead, he rests his own on yours and stares right into you eyes, stare piercing right into your soul.
"i'll make you feel so good, baby- you'll feel amazing, i promise-" he continues his ramblings, at this rate getting delirious at the mere thought of how cute you'll look when cumming around him and because of him.
his cock slides out and inside you again with ease, stretching and filling your tight pussy to the brim, knocking the air out of your lungs. gasping and moaning, you reach for his hand, needing to hold it through the whole session.
you two are so needy for each other's body, soul, mind, and heart and it's showing in every little move. dan heng quickly intertwines your hand with his, holding it gently yet in a firm grip. you put your other palm at the back of his head, and with fingers fidgeting with his hair, you pull him closer for a heated and full of devotion kiss.
he's waiting patiently for your walls to adjust to his size, but when they squeeze him so deliciously, it's hard to resist. his kisses and touches get impatient, more needy, and more possessive. taking a handful of one of your breasts, he squeezes the soft flesh and brushes his fingers across you nipple just to tease you and elicit more of those cute sounds from you.
"f-fuck, dan heng-" you whimper softly right into his lips, the stretch being overwhelmingly amazing. your breathing is ragged and shaky, thoughts race out of your mind at the feeling of his cock inside you.
"baby, you're so- so tight, aeons-" he starts grunting and moaning, finally rolling his hips further into your core. "your pussy is so good i- i can't control myself anymore, baby-"
the heated kisses you two exchange while mingled together make you both even more sweaty, smell of sex filling the room, soaking into the walls, bedsheets, everywhere where it can, just to remind you later how fiery and passionate your love is.
dan heng explores your body further with his free hand, the warm palm hovering over your skin sets your senses aflame further. his soft touch is addicting, paired with his throbbing cock thrusting in and out of your pussy makes such a dangerous mix. his hand roams over your breasts, stomach, sides, everywhere he can reach. when he reaches your hips and thighs, you react immediately, making his heart flutter and mind fuzzy with excitement.
"you like being touched here?" he asks softly, fingers brushing over your thighs, from the inner part to the outer, up and down, repeat. you don't say anything, yet he knows the answer to his question right after; the way your pussy flutters around his length, how your legs shake, how you moan louder – all of it makes his head spin and causes a wicked grin to appear on his face.
you squeeze his hand and pull him closer, hand on the back of his head pulling him in for another sloppy kiss. but you trail off your lips to the side, kissing and licking your way from the corner of his lips to his jaw, neck, shoulder, and collarbone, leaving soft marks with almost every kiss. moaning into his skin, you nibble on the sensitive parts of his neck, the need to claim him and show everyone who he belongs to being too alluring to resist.
"oh, fuck-!" dan heng is not prepared for you marking him up but aeons does he love it. tilting his head to the side, he gives you easier access to all the places he wants- no, he needs- to be marked. his breath gets shallow and ragged, cock throbbing and pulsing inside you because of how much he loves this; the marks that he will show with pride, announcing to everyone that he's yours and yours only.
his quiet whimpers and moans sound so pretty, paired with the squelching noises of his cock pumping itself into your pussy give a lovely one-of-a-kind concerto meant only for the two of you; a concerto about desire, love, and trust, a tribute to love you two hold for each other.
"d-dan heng! ah-! you feel- so good- ah!" crying out in pleasure, you arch your back with a loud moan when the tip of his cock nudges at that one sweet spot, having you sob and scream his name further.
it's like the more you scream his name, the more dan heng goes insane. with his eyes closed, he's panting into your neck, sliding inside you with ease and need; he needs you to cream around him, he needs to feel your cum coating his already sensitive length, he needs to hear you more, even if your throat is already dry because of the constant screams.
"mmh- baby, you're doing so good for me, fuck- keep going, moan my name- you're such a good- good fucking girl-"
your thighs shake and squeeze around his waist while your hips stutter, your whole body being lit on fire when you cum, gushing around him and squeezing his cock deeper inside. crying out, your whole body stiffens as you lose control, pussy throbbing, creaming, and milking him with need of his load.
seeing you like this, body flushed, pleasure written all over your face, with one hand holding his and the other one gripping the sheets... dan heng can't take it anymore. he's cumming right after, thick load after load filling your greedy little pussy up to the brim, as it milks his length further.
he rests his head in the crook of your neck, panting and smiling, placing soft and lazy kisses over your neck and shoulder. you still squeeze his hand, placing the other around him, soothing his back with your light and gentle touch. nuzzling your cheeks against his, you try to calm your labored breathing.
"mmm- you did so well, darling," dan heng muses quietly, finally lifting his head and looking at you, eyes full of love and adoration. he grips your hip softly, caressing your skin with his fingers. "are you tired, baby?"
"not that much," you answer, voice quiet and ragged with heavy breaths, as you try to calm down. the intensity of the moment got to you, and now you need a little more time to come back to your senses.
"then- can we go another round?"
you freeze, confused yet... enticed by the offer. you can feel how his cock is still hard, twitching and throbbing, waiting for you. aeons, it feels so good.
with one, swift motion, you pull him closer, kissing him with newly-found intensity, one he never imagined you could even feel for him, boring loser dan heng.
"let's go."
letting out a small chuckle of relief, dan heng looks at you for a second, admiring your sparkling eyes, flushed face, beautiful features. he can't help it; he dives in for another kiss, sloppy and messy, whimpering softly into your lips. the feeling of his breath on your face, how he tries to compose himself further, it's so extremely hot and tempting.
"are you really so needy? for me?" you tease him, knowing smirk glued to your face when dan heng pulls away for a second, his head quickly turning back to you, completely forgetting what he was looking for.
"y-yes..."
chuckling and cooing, you grab his chin, firmly but not strong enough to hurt; turning his red face to yours, lips millimeters away, you smirk again. as you look into his eyes, your fingers graze over his chin.
"do you want me to take care of you, then?"
his heart stops for a second, mind disappearing right after. with lips slightly parted, he's looking you in the eyes, stare hazed with desire devotion, and everything he's holding for you.
"yes, please."
quickly yet clumsily, you switch positions, with you now straddling his lap, dan heng sitting on his pile of blankets, staring at you with his pretty, pleading eyes. his hard cock nestled between your thighs is leaking precum again, the essence bubbling at the tip, smearing over your skin.
dan heng, the usually composed and collected archivist, is now getting putty in your hands, melting under you, mewling and whimpering for you to take care of him and his length that's aching for you. this mess of horny, insatiable, and devoted nerd that wasn't touched by anyone else is for you and you only. and it's an incredible sight.
"baby-" he's whining, quiet moans slipping past his slightly parted, swollen from all the kisses lips, covered in spit and sweat; the glistening and plump lips you love to devour.
"what is it?" your eyes wander from his lips to his slowly teary eyes, eyelashes sweetly batting the tears and sweat away; but it's his lips that's your weakness. in seconds if not less, you press a sweet yet passionate kiss, tongues dancing with each other as dan heng lets you devour his mouth, whimpering and almost cumming at the mere taste of your sweet lips.
"please, baby- i need you- i need you so bad," he's mumbling, whining and losing everything, ready to cry; all he needs is you and your sweet pussy, yet you keep it all away from him, like a big meanie!
he's kissing the corner of your lips, your cheeks, neck, everywhere he can reach, softly pecking your silky skin while maintaining eye contact, his big, puppy eyes pleading for you to ease his needs. "please baby, i need to- i need to be inside- i need your pussy so bad-"
"i got you, i got you-" you mumble out, needy for him as well. it's a rare occasion to have dan heng all for yourself, so you decide to use this opportunity.
slowly, you guide his tip inside your slick entrance, sucking him inside bit by bit. you need to take deep breaths to calm down and not straight-up impale yourself, but aeons, his cock just feels so good...
finally, you take his length all inside, moaning out loud with a little cry, his throbbing cock finally nestled deep where it belongs.
"mmh- fuck! d-dan heng, you feel- so good-" breathing out, you shiver and throw your head back, chest moving up and down rapidly as you try to continue breathing. with hands on his shoulders, you start to bounce on him, his cock easily sliding in and out as you ride both of your brains out.
you can't even focus on how pretty he looks in his fucked-out state, you yourself giving in to the pleasure. eyes rolled back, mouth parted – the stimulation and overall experience being quite intense, lots of emotions, need, and urgency make you two go non-verbal for a while; only deep panting and whimpers audible throughout the room.
"d-darling, oh fuck! so good-" dan heng lets out slurred words, eyes back in his skull as he starts to drool. quickly wiping his lips, he lets out another pretty moan, pulling your face closer to his own, and kissing you with urgency. his big hands, one on the back of your head and the other one on your thigh, hold you with care, not pushing, not pulling that roughly. he's powerless, too vulnerable, and hazy with lust to even think.
with your pussy hugging his cock so tight he's close again, legs shaking and hips jerking up to meet yours mid-way. you're close too, body shaking slightly, jolts of pleasure coursing through you as you pick up your pace. the need washes over you two, mingling your bodies together as you stay nestled in each other's embrace, fucking your brains out and confessing all the pent-up emotions.
your whimpers, his moans, and screams of each other's name echo through the archives for few hours straight, as you two just can't get enough, ready to pass out then stop. the few short breaks you two take are long enough for yearning to build up again, the whole cycle repeating again.
thank aeons the rest of the crew was out, as march and caelus would complain for the next week again.
| MLIST | if you liked this piece, please reblog! 𓆩♡𓆪
@ cosmic-expressions / @ deka-dent 2024, do not repost pls
#dan heng#dan heng smut#dan heng x reader#hsr smut#honkai star rail smut#honkai star rail x reader#hsr x reader#honkai star rail#fics: dan heng#fics: honkai star rail
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i see u pleading for an andrew request so IM GONNA DELIVER 😼 what if. academic to lovers college au where y/n and andrew get assigned to a group project or smth (ion get how college works YET) and it’s actually really fluffy?? like maybe slightly yandere andrew where’s he’s a lil possessive but nothing too toxic that would scare a girl away irl.,.. okay that’s my idea good luck 🤧
Yandere! Andrew Graves x Reader (College AU)
Wordcount: 1,500+ words
Andrew and you had the same history class and your professor paired the two of you up to research about WWI and create a presentation for class. You couldn’t use the internet for research, so you had to resort to digging around the city's library.
Andrew was a bit annoyed at first for this project. He preferred working alone, it made it so others wouldn’t get in his way while working and so he could have all his work credited for.
Andrew quickly grew to respect you when you actually took the project serious instead of placing the work on him because he was smart, or just goofing off and not contributing. He respected that you could work efficiently at a decent-pace, but also you could have fun too. You could crack harmless jokes, and you could make something as boring as studying entertaining and fun while still taking your deadline and work seriously.
Andrew quickly breaks out of his shell with you. You just have some sort of aura that draws him to you, he can't help but laugh at your jokes or guide you through the books with him.
By the end of the first study session, Andrew leaves feeling happy to spend his time researching with you, and a bit sad that he has to wait until tomorrow to see you again.
The next day, you both go back to the library to research some more material for your project. You gather up what books you want to dissect today, sitting down at a table with Andrew to study, but he seems a bit distracted now.
Andrew's eyes drift from the pages to you repeatedly, he couldn't read a full page without looking at you twice, which made your work less efficient.
"Are you okay?" you finally questioned. Andrew seemed surprised that you caught him, his green eyes flickering in surprise, before he cleared his throat. "Um... yeah. I'm just thirsty." He lied. "Hey, do you want a drink? There's a coffee shop not too far from the here. We can continue studying there?" he suggested. "Sure." You smiled, seeing no harm in it.
Andrew looked relieved that you accepted his proposal. You both gathered your materials and books, walking together to the library. Andrew stayed walking on the side of the road, a silent act of chivalry that you probably wouldn't have noticed if you weren't observing him to see if he was alright.
When you got to the coffee shop and ordered your drinks, Andrew sat next to you in the same booth, your shoulders as he claimed it would be easier to point out what one another is talking about and to hear each other better in this crowded place.
Even though you both had gotten your drinks, Andrew's mind was still somewhere else. He was too busy staring at you, thinking of how pretty you looked with how your hair was done, or how your eyes looked in this coffee shop's lighting, or how you bit your lip slightly when you started to daydream while reading about the boring events going on for your project.
By the end of your second day together, you both had to leave the coffee shop because of how late it got. Andrew was disappointed he had to leave you, but he knew he'd see you tomorrow.
On day three, Andrew woke up early and stopped at the library to check out some books for today's study session. He dropped them off at his apartment, cleaning up his apartment some before walking to class. He sees you and sits next to you during the lecture, making small talk with you before class started.
Andrew and you goofed off a bit during class, but were still pretty productive helping each other out and not being too distracting to your other peers, so your professor allowed you two to stay seated together.
When class was over, Andrew mentioned how he picked up books earlier this morning during a grocery run since the library was just around the corner from him (liar). He said the books were at his apartment and that you both can study at his place.
You agreed. It'd be easier to study someplace where you wouldn't get kicked out for staying too long or for being too loud, and it's also helpful for if you get thirsty or hungry. You and Andrew walked to his apartment together as he walked on the side traffic was.
Andrew almost wrapped his arm around your waist, but felt that it would be too intimate for now (he didn't want to scare you after all!) He instead placed his arm around your shoulders and pulled you close to his side.
When you questioned what he was doing, Andrew leaned down into your ear and spoke: "it's loud out here with the traffic and all, this just makes it easier to hear you."
You ignored it, following him back to his apartment. He unlocked the door and allowed you to step inside, before closing it behind you and locking it. Andrew took you to his bedroom, saying the books were in there.
The books were on his bed as Andrew sat down on it, looking up at you, as if telling you to join him in bed. You did, sitting down next to him and picking up a book to start analyzing. Andrew had a bit of a hard time focusing with you in his room, on his bed, alone with his company. He was able to manage, reading and going over the topics with you.
Andrew played soft jazz music in the background, claiming that the music was around the same time period as the project, so perhaps it'd get them in the mood to keep studying or maybe the lyrics could have something mentioning the project. Either way, the music and all this reading was starting to make you sleepy.
Andrew noticed how your eyes drooped, and how your head started to bounce up and down as you tried to keep yourself away. He hid his smile by hiding his face with his book. Before you could try leaving, you fell asleep on his bed next to him. Andrew noticed, and after a few minutes of making sure you were completely asleep, he placed both of your books down on his dresser, writing today's research papers for the two of you since you were asleep.
Andrew curled up next to you, wrapping his arms around you as he admired your sleeping figure. He kept the jazz music playing in the background, just in case you woke up from him turning it off and so it looked like he fell asleep too when you would eventually wake up.
When you woke up, you were fairly confused and flustered that you had fallen asleep in Andrew's room, and even more flustered once you realized you not only fell asleep in his bed, but his arms too. Andrew stirred awake when you tried to move out of his grasp, realizing you woke up. He apologized (fake, of course) and said that when he sleeps he usually hugs a pillow, so he must've thought you were his pillow when he fell asleep.
It was a reasonable answer, so you accepted the apology and moved on, getting ready for class. In the next few days, you and Andrew were able to finish your project and presentation together, getting a perfect score with each other's help.
Andrew was disappointed that you two couldn't work together on the project together, so he proposed that you two become study buddies and help each other study. You accepted, making Andrew happy that he still got to see you and hang out with you after school alone.
When Andrew left to go back to his parent's apartment, he made sure to call you about the situation at home, the contaminated water and the quarantine and all. He called you everyday, for hours at a time as you both fell asleep on the phone lines.
When Andrew's calls faded all of a sudden, you were pretty concerned for him. He still wasn't in class, and he hadn't called you in almost a week despite your phone calls every day.
It wasn't until you got a knock on your apartment that you saw him. When you opened the door, Andrew rushed in and immediately picked you up, spinning you around in the air as he smiled.
"(Y/N)!" he smiled brightly, his hands on your hips as he spun you in the air happily. "Andrew!" you gasped, a smile making way on your face as you couldn't help but laugh as his actions. "Where have you been? Why haven't you been calling me?" you questioned, your face turning in confusion when you caught the whiff of something metallic on his clothing. "That doesn't matter." He smiled, setting you down on the ground as he looked at you adoringly. You noticed something on his cheek and used your thumb to wipe it off. It was a small blotch of red. Strange... "That doesn't matter anymore. She tried to keep us apart, but I wouldn't let that happen." He spoke, his eyes half-lidded as he stared into your pretty ones. "Nothing matters anymore. I'm here with you now."
Thank you for the request! I'm a huge simp for Andrew (especially yandere) so I had such fun writing this!
Want more Andrew Graves content? Check out the Andrew Graves masterlist!
Inbox is open for requests!
#stellar constellations#andy graves#andrew graves x reader#andy graves x reader#x reader#x you#x y/n#x yn#fem reader#x fem!reader#x female y/n#x female reader#the coffin of andy and leyley#andy and leyley#yandere x you#yandere x reader#yandere x yandere#yandere x willing reader#yandere
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chapter (3) — omg
GENRE: alternate universe - actors/celeb au!
WARNING/S: not safe for work (nsfw), r-18 and above, actors/singers au!, romance, fluff, minor angst, slow burn, humour, slice of life, will they won't they, light-hearted, flirting, playful, possessiveness, teasing, explicit content, possible, kissing, sexual content, innuendos, drama, feels, hurt/comfort, falling in love, love, happy ending, actor/singer! sukuna, actress/celeb! reader;
WORD COUNT: 3.3k words.
NOTE: i really think that if this were to happen irl, everyone would just really really lose their minds like??? genuinely. i really think that people would be entertained and also not. these are the in between of the kinktober event, which starts october 4th (6 pm pst, 9 am for ph time and 4 pm uk time) - the first one is also a sukuna one too!!! please enjoy them as they come out!!! thank you for your continued love!!! i love you all <3
TAGLIST: @kunasthiast, @midnight-138, @v3nd3ttal3on, @r0ckst4rjk, @theshxaverse, @cheescakebroom, @kariatenoh ;
masterlist
hey lover! series
IT WAS THAT SIX MONTH PERIOD THAT STUNNED THE WORLD. The internet was already on the verge of a meltdown the day it was announced that you and Sukuna were going to star opposite of each other in a new romantic drama film.
The plot? A searing, emotionally intense story about a husband and wife’s failing marriage. That alone was enough to send fans into a frenzy. The idea of you two, already known for your incredible chemistry, playing lovers on the brink of collapse was the stuff of internet gold.
Speculation ran wild for months. There were endless fan theories about how much tension would be in the movie, the inevitable blow-out arguments, and the long, charged stares across dimly lit rooms.
But the moment the real rumor started spreading—that the on-screen couple would have a full-blown romance scene—it was like gasoline was thrown on the fire.
Twitter threads were filled with fans practically holding their breath, trying to figure out if this was just clickbait or if the movie would actually go there. For weeks, fans analyzed trailers and snippets of scenes, slowing down moments to see if they could spot any clues.
There was talk of “the tension is unreal” or “there’s NO WAY they’ll pull off that scene without killing us all”. But despite the rampant speculation, nothing could have prepared them for what came next.
Then, the movie premiered. And that’s when everything exploded.
One fan was the first to drop the bombshell:
SukusukuOne Tweet: “WAIT. WHAT? A SEX SCENE BETWEEN THEM?!?!”
That single tweet ignited a wildfire across every social media platform. It took only minutes before reactions flooded in from every corner of the internet. It was as if the world collectively gasped and lost its ability to function.
Fans who had managed to watch the early screenings immediately went into panic mode, sending everyone else into spirals of anticipation.
Y/N’sWorldHQ: “I KNEW IT. I FREAKING KNEW IT BUT I WASN’T READY. NOT LIKE THIS.”
SukuY/NHQ: “BESTIES, THIS IS NOT A DRILL. THIS IS SO FUCKING REAL!!!
Y/N-Rin: We asked for tension and got THIS. I CAN’T BREATHE.”
SukunaSource: “Forget the plot—I need a minute to process what I just saw. That scene? UNREAL.”
Y/N–SUKUONE “Y’all. It’s not just a scene. It’s THE scene. They went THERE and I’m not okay.”
For Y/N: "I WAS NOT READY FOR THIS. SOMEONE HOLD ME."
Suku–king: “SUKUNA. SEX SCENE. I REPEAT: SUKUNA. SEX SCENE. WITH Y/N?!? breathes into a paper bag"
Y/N–Hiromi: "Oh, y’all are just gonna drop this bomb and leave us to SCREAM?"
Pop Star Kuna: "No, because how am I supposed to sit through that scene like a normal person? I’ll be watching through my fingers."
Y/N Movie Era: "WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS OKAY TO GIVE US THIS LEVEL OF ENERGY IN A MOVIE?!? MY WIG IS IN ANOTHER GALAXY.”
GIFs of you and Sukuna in slow, sultry close-ups began circulating within minutes. The intensity, the way the scene built from raw emotion to passionate release, left fans utterly destroyed.
People were making reaction videos, pausing the exact second the scene got too hot to handle and screaming at their screens. Thirst tweets, memes, and GIFs of fans collapsing on their couches like they’d just run a marathon became the norm.
HiroKuna: “I’M YELLING. THEY REALLY DID THAT. NO ONE TOLD ME I NEEDED OXYGEN.”
KukuNa7: “I knew it would be good, but I didn’t think it would be THIS. I feel like I need a cigarette and I don’t even smoke.”
Hiromimimi: “The way they LOOK at each other?! The rawness of it all?! This scene is pure FIRE.”
As if the internet wasn’t on fire enough, you and Sukuna decided to fuel the flames even further. You hopped on Twitter, casually posting a behind-the-scenes video of the two of you messing around in between takes.
In the shot, Sukuna was leaning back on the bed, one arm draped over his eyes, mid-laugh, while you sat there making faces at the as you got your retouching make up done. You tell him to stop, but you just both kept laughing and got scolded by the make up artist. Sukuna then calls you beautiful, and you blush.
Y/NTheOne: “When the ‘passionate scene’ turns into a blooper reel. 😂 No one tells you how hard it is to keep a straight face. #BTS #MovieMagic”
The reaction? Absolute chaos. Fans didn’t know whether to scream, cry, or laugh.
sukurin: “They’re just gonna post this like it’s no big deal??? WDYM SUKUNA CALLS HER BEAUTIFUL AND SHE JUST BLUSHES??? BRO???”
y/n’s princess: “OKAY BUT I LOVE HOW CASUAL THEY ARE ABOUT THIS. HELP.”
sukuy/n’s love child: “I’M NEVER GETTING OVER THIS. NEVER.”
kunatuna: “The fact that they’re laughing like this in between scenes, and we’re out here struggling to breathe??”
Not to be outdone, Sukuna joined in on the fun a few hours later by posting his own video on his Instagram story. The clip showed you two rehearsing the confrontation scene between the spouses and you were screaming at the top of your lungs before he made a face and you immediately break, falling into his arms and suddenly laughing as hard as humanly possible. Sukuna wrapped his arms around you too, hugging you back.
ItsRyoSuku: “Professional actors, by the way. 😂 #HappyTogether”
Cue more pandemonium:
JJK (Taylor’s Version): “NOT THEM POSTING BTS FOOTAGE LIKE THIS. STOPPPP.”
kukuna1989: “I can’t breathe. How are they this funny and attractive at the same time???”
y/n on the ring: “This video is sending me. They’re out here clowning and we’re suffering.”
y/nkunaaaaaahhhhhhhh: “I’m trying to focus on their acting, but instead I’m watching them roast themselves. THIS IS GOLD.”
kukukufukukukuku: WHAT DO YOU MEAN HAPPY TOGETHER??? RYOMEN SUKUNA????
Fan TikToks:
Y/N–Na–Na–Na: (in a shaky voice) “So, I just watched the scene… and honestly, I don’t think I’m okay. No spoilers, but if you think you can handle it—YOU CAN’T.” Cue someone throwing a pillow at the camera.
SukuPop: "There’s thirst traps, and then there’s THIS MOVIE. HOW DID WE GET HERE?"
And as if that wasn’t enough, a massive fan thread started trending on Twitter titled:
"Are They Dating or Just TOO Good at Acting?"
Enter you and Sukuna again, ready to add more and more fuel to the fire.
You once more jumped on the bandwagon with another cheeky Twitter post, sharing a behind-the-scenes photo of you both between takes. This was the alternative extension that was cut from the film — one which the director really liked. But it just didn’t make the final editing cut.
Still, the shot was perfect: Ryomen Sukuna, half-dressed from the scene, lying on the bed resting his head against your shoulder, laughing about something you said. You? Half covered in the blankets. You were looking down at him, also laughing as you were in the middle of speaking, holding onto a pillow for dear life, your hair tousled from filming.
Y/NTheOne: “Sukuna tried to hold it for this shot. But I wished this made it too! 😂 #BTS #MovieMagic"
The internet? Instantly set ablaze. ONCE AGAIN.
HiromiRyomenCentral: "OKAY BUT YOU CAN’T JUST DROP THIS AND NOT GIVE US MORE!"
KingofCursesStan: "They’re out here laughing, and I’m out here crying. MAKE IT MAKE SENSE."
Y/NStan: "Not them acting all cute and casual when we’re out here clutching our pearls. I CAN’T."
Then, of course, Ryomen Sukuna couldn’t lose here—of course, in classic Sukuna fashion.
He posted a behind-the-scenes video on Instagram of you both rehearsing the scene. But instead of being sexy and intense, it was pure comedy. The two of you were dramatically exaggerating every move, making ridiculous faces at each other.
You were both exhausted, but you both wanted to wake each other up. So, it came to this — both of you losing your minds to make everything as funny as possible. At one point, Sukuna dramatically threw himself back on the bed, rolling his eyes in a mock-swoon while you burst into giggles so uncontrollable that you doubled over.
ItsRyoSuku: “Multiverse of Madness 😂 #ItsAComedyActually"
Fans were once more losing their minds in the comments:
RyoHQ: “NOT SUKUNA TURNING THIS INTO A COMEDY SKETCH?! I CAN’T BREATHE.”
SukuRy: "I’m gonna need 48 hours to recover from the whiplash between the actual scene and THIS."
SukuStar: "Please tell me the DVD has a blooper reel. I BEG YOU."
StarStarKuna: "Y’all are just CLOWNING at this point, meanwhile I’m struggling to form a coherent thought after seeing that scene.”
The memes were iconic. Some were based on popular crying reaction GIFs, while others used dramatic slow-motion moments to parody the sheer intensity of the scene. One particularly viral meme had Sukuna’s character looking down at you in the scene with the caption: “When your favorite ship finally goes canon and it’s STEAMY AF.”
Soon, clips from the movie were being re-edited with dramatic soundtracks, making the moment between your characters feel even more cinematic, even more romantic. Someone even edited the entire scene to Celine Dion’s “It’s All Coming Back to Me Now”, and the internet practically screamed.
You and Sukuna couldn’t help but keep the fun going. A few hours later, you responded to one of the fan edits with a quote-tweet, saying:
Y/NTheOne: “Honestly, this edit is better than the actual movie. 😆”
Sukuna, naturally, followed up with a comment that sent everyone into a tailspin:
ItsRyoSuku: “Still waiting on our Grammy for ‘Best Chemistry On-Screen.’ 😏”
The internet was absolutely living for it. Fans were quick to point out every tiny behind-the-scenes moment, analyzing the body language, the laughter, and of course, the constant playful teasing between you two. Some fans even swore up and down that they knew you two had undeniable off-screen chemistry, and this was just proof.
MimiHiro67 Posted: "Look at the way he looks at her like that. I’m telling you, IT’S NOT JUST ACTING."
Kuku/Y/N Replied: "The flirting during the bloopers?? HELLO?! WE’RE SEEING IT."
HiroKunaFT Replied: "They’re out here, trolling us, but I KNOW they’re secretly dating. THEY HAVE TO BE."
Before you knew it, fan art, memes, and theories flooded every corner of the internet. There were edits of you and Sukuna as modern-day star-crossed lovers, wedding fanfics, and even whole video compilations of you two joking and messing around during interviews.
But perhaps the most hilarious reaction came from one particular fan who summed it up perfectly in a single tweet:
Y/NKunaSource: “Let’s be real. We’re all just happy to live in a world where they exist and can mess with us like this. Bless.”
By the end of the week, the internet was a beautiful mix of chaos, laughter, and way too many thirst traps inspired by that one scene. You and Sukuna continued to play along with the fans, leaning into the fun and teasing just enough to keep everyone guessing—and loving every second of it.
The chaos continued to escalate in the following days, with the internet running wild over every new detail, theory, and behind-the-scenes snippet about the two of you and your relationship. Fans were relentless, and you and Sukuna? You weren’t about to let things calm down just yet. If anything, you leaned into the frenzy, becoming the ultimate internet trolls.
It started innocently enough. You posted a cute boomerang of the two of you at a cast dinner, clinking glasses and flashing cheeky grins at the camera. You looked stunning resting against Sukuna’s chair. Harmless, right? Not according to the fanbase.
Y/NTheOne: “Cheers to being the internet’s favorite scandal 😜🍸#StillNotDating #OrAreWe?”
That was enough to send your followers spiraling into madness again. Fans combed through the boomerang as if it held secret, hidden messages. Someone even analyzed Sukuna’s scarlet eye contact in slow motion, trying to decipher what it all meant.
Sukuna’sHuh!?: “THE CHEMISTRY. I CAN’T. They’re definitely dating.”
YoHiroKuna: “Every time they say they’re ‘not dating,’ I lose five years off my life from the lies. 😂”
Kukukukuna: “Why are they like this?! Just admit it already!”
Veteran Actor Ryomen Sukuna, never one to miss out on the fun, upped the ante. He soon after posted a selfie of the two of you on set, both of you in full costume, right before filming a scene. The twist? You were sitting in his lap, giggling as he gave the camera a devilish smirk. The caption?
ItsRyoSuku: “Just another day at work with my favorite co-star, my baby doll 👀 #WeLiveForMethodActing #OrDoWe"
The comment section exploded:
SukuDw: "EXCUSE ME, SIR??? SITTING IN HIS LAP?!?"
Y/N’sbabygirl: “Method acting? Is that what we’re calling this now?? LMAO”
RyoRyoYoBoat: "My mind can’t handle this level of chaos. 😳"
Then came the real kicker. In the start of the promo junket, there was an interview shot to promote the movie. And the host, unable to resist, asked you both about that scene again. The moment the question was out there, Sukuna leaned back in his chair, arms crossed, eyes sparkling with mischief.
The host clears his throat. “So, everyone’s talking about that… intimate scene between you two. How did you prepare for it?”
Without missing a beat, Sukuna deadpanned, “Oh, we didn’t prepare at all. We just winged it. All natural chemistry. It’s just like that between me and my doll, right here.” He shot you a wink, making you snort with laughter.
You, trying to play it cool but clearly failing, added, “Honestly, I think the hardest part was not laughing through the whole thing. I mean, darling, we’re professionals, but…”
Sukuna cut in, “But when you’re this close with someone…” He leaned toward you, smirking, “… things just come naturally.”
The internet immediately combusted. Clips of the interview spread like wildfire, with fans collectively losing their minds. The phrase “all natural chemistry” trended on Twitter for hours.
JJK4HiroKuna: “’Natural chemistry’ MY HEART IS DONE.”
HiroKunaHiroKuna: "He WINKED?! IS HE TRYING TO KILL US?!"
OneY/NKunaNation: “We all just agreed they’re married at this point, right?”
Y/N–Y/NHQ: I bet the bed chem is also natural, huh?
Memes flooded every platform. One fan made a video edit of you and Sukuna’s most flirtatious moments, set to some dramatic, romantic soundtrack. The edit quickly went viral, with even more fans joining the speculation train. Soon, someone added to the thread a GIF of Sukuna winking from another project, captioning it with, “When he knows EXACTLY what he’s doing.”
The internet was already hanging by a thread after months of anticipation, memes, and wild speculation, but that night—that night—Sukuna and you delivered the ultimate bombshell that no one saw coming.
It was the end of the movie's promotional tour, and just when fans thought they had seen everything there was to see, Sukuna decided to drop a casual little Instagram story that sent the entire fanbase spiraling.
The video was simple enough at first: the two of you chilling in his trailer during a break, scrolling through Twitter and Instagram, laughing at the flood of comments, reaction videos, and memes about your on-screen chemistry.
But it was the soundtrack that immediately caught everyone's attention—George Michael’s “Careless Whisper” playing softly in the background. That instantly iconic sax riff was the setup for what was about to be an unforgettable moment. Fans knew something chaotic was coming; it was only a matter of what.
Sukuna, ever the mastermind, flipped the camera towards himself, giving a mock-serious look before turning it to you, sitting next to him on the couch, grinning like you were in on the joke.
Sukuna looks at you, smirking. “So, the rumors are true.”
That one line was enough to make everyone sit up, hearts pounding, fingers hovering over their keyboards, ready to fire off tweets. You, already sensing where this was headed, played along like the pro you were.
You raised your brow, matching his smirk. “What rumors?”
Sukuna turned his head slowly, looking directly into the camera with that signature smirk that drove fans wild. His voice dropped to a low, sultry tone, dripping with fake seriousness.
He snickers back. “The ones about us, doll.” He paused, letting the tension build, eyes twinkling with mischief. And then, with perfect comedic timing, he delivered the finishing blow. “We do love keeping people on their toes.”
That was it. That’s all it took. The fanbase erupted into chaos as the video zoomed in dramatically on both of your faces, just before you two completely lost it, bursting into uncontrollable laughter. The screen faded to black, but the internet was already ablaze.
The hashtags #TheRumorsAreTrue, #SukunaAndHisDoll, and #KeepingUsOnOurToes were trending worldwide within minutes. Memes were being generated at lightning speed, GIFs of the dramatic zoom popping up on every corner of the web. And the fan comments? Absolute gold.
HiromiSource: “WHY ARE THEY LIKE THIS?!? I CAN’T KEEP UP.”
KingofCursesHQ: “They’re literally trolling us and I LOVE IT.”
HiroKuna4Lyfe: “The fact that Sukuna just casually said ‘the rumors are true’ and then did THAT?? I’M GONE.”
Reaction videos flooded TikTok, fans filming themselves losing their minds as they watched Sukuna drop the ultimate tease. One user even posted a slow-motion edit of the zoom with captions like “My heart cannot handle this level of trolling, this is bad for me” and “They’re playing with us like it’s a sport, and I’m here for it.”
But just when you thought the chaos had peaked, Sukuna decided to throw another wrench into the mix. About five minutes after the video went live, he took to Twitter to reply to the overwhelming reactions.
@ItsRyoKuna: “Oh? Did I? Hm…..I wonder if I did?”
That tweet sent fans into a frenzy all over again. The cryptic nature, the smirk behind the words—it was peak Sukuna, and they were living for it.
HiroKuKu: “HE KNOWS WHAT HE’S DOING. STOP THIS MAN. NO DON’T.”
Pop Sensation Kuna: “’Did I?’ SIR I’M NOT OKAY WITH THIS LEVEL OF TEASING.”
YoItsKukuNa: “Sukuna’s out here stirring the pot like a pro, and I can’t even be mad.”
Of course, you couldn’t resist getting in on the fun either. A few minutes after Sukuna’s tweet, you replied:
@Y/NTheOne: “Guess we’ll never know 😏”
And that? That was the nail in the coffin. Fans went into full meltdown mode. Screenshots of your reply were immediately plastered across every fan page, each theory more dramatic than the last.
HiroY/NHQ: “NOT YOU TOO. ARE WE EVER GONNA GET A STRAIGHT ANSWER???”
SusuKuY/N: “This is literally a soap opera and I’m addicted. GIVE ME MORE.”
It’sY/N’sWorld: Y/N ITS TIME TO STOP IM GOING CRAZY
@Y/NTheOne Replied: No <3
Before long, the internet was awash in fan art, with some recreating the trailer scene in elaborate comic-book style panels, and others painting romanticized versions of your characters together, always with that cheeky, ambiguous vibe that kept everyone on edge.
The fans were even dissecting the choice of “Careless Whisper” in the background. Some insisted it was a secret code, a hint that there was something more going on between you two than just professional chemistry. Others joked that it was Sukuna’s favorite way to troll, playing the ultimate cheesy song during the ultimate tease.
HelloDoll: “Careless Whisper? REALLY?? That’s the most dramatic song choice and I’m here for it.”
JJKuna: “They’re basically telling us they’re the chaotic couple of the century and I can’t handle it.”
The memes kept coming. Someone edited a video of Sukuna saying, “The rumors are true.” then cut to fans fainting and screaming in reaction clips. Another fan took a screenshot of your zoom-in moment and slapped “I WILL NEVER RECOVER” in bold letters across it.
As the fanbase continued to spiral, Sukuna and you just watched from the sidelines, laughing at the chaos you’d unleashed. It was a perfect storm—your playful trolling, the cheeky teasing, and the undeniable chemistry that everyone loved to speculate about.
By the end of the night, the internet was convinced they’d been played in the best way possible. The mystery surrounding your relationship status was still intact, but you’d managed to make the entire ordeal one of the most memorable and entertaining situations in pop culture for your fans.
And for the fans? They wouldn’t have had it any other way.
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#jjk x you#jjk x y/n#jujutsu kaisen x y/n#sukuna ryomen#ryomen sukuna#jujutsu kaisen sukuna#jjk sukuna#sukuna#ryoumen sukuna#jjk ryomen sukuna#jujutsu sukuna#sukuna jjk#ryoumen sukuna x reader#sukuna ryoumen x reader#sukuna ryoumen x you#ryomen sukuna x you#ryomen sukuna x reader#sukuna ryomen x you#sukuna ryomen x reader#jjk sukuna x reader#sukuna x reader#sukuna x you#sukuna x y/n#actor sukuna au ! ! !#kayu writes ! ! !
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If Emesis Blue really is a Dream, I love the fact that BLU Medic sees RED the way he does.
Think about it, BLU Medic is a Catholic who knows he’s mentally ill and is trying his best to keep it under control. RED Medic is a megalomaniac who likes the challenge of playing god and made a deal with the devil.
And beyond that, BLU has other personalities that he doesn’t understand [who freak him out] and hallucinates them from time to time.
That’s the actual reason he didn’t attack RED immediately, he thought it was one of them from afar. It has to be trippy and difficult to deal with that guy IRL in battle with the personality issue.
And even if BLU doesn’t know it, if he thinks his other personalities are demons or something, they still act like people. Angry, revengeful people, but not monsters. This picture is such a good representation of the difference between the two. RED is feral and messing with powers he shouldn’t…. For fun. Fixing respawn failures is not “for fun” it’s meant to save mercenary lives. So RED would be Monstrous.
He’s still red hued even in this blue room, skin and hair too, like a demon. And given he joined Classic team in hunting his own crew and BLU mercs, it makes sense that he’s literally two-faced.
Something else that’s interesting is that BLU Medic’s eyes are only ever black/brown as the funeral version, and he has hallucinations that make that personality look demonic.
But again, funeral Medic acts like a human person that’s 100% done with BLU Corp and their lies, not a cryptid. He’s not actually evil like Ludwig thinks.
But RED Medic is criminally insane in ways that transcend other Gravel War mercs, and that’s disturbing to someone like BLU.
O no he crumchy
He just put Scout’s body in a coffin as respectfully as he could given the circumstances. RED Medic brought their team’s sniper back to life and there’s no way BLU hasn’t heard about it post-comics. He didn’t want RED touching Scout, even if it could bring him back. He doesn’t trust that maniac, and that’s 100% valid. Why?
BLU team doesn’t know RED personally. What they’re like at their base, living with each other. They don’t know that RED Medic was infiltrating Classic, not truly joining them. They don’t know what he was doing in the early 40s or how close he is with RED Heavy. And here’s the proof:
BLU Medic doesn’t know that this is BLU Heavy; he knows that he’s at RED base, and wouldn’t have a reason to believe that this isn’t RED Heavy. Especially after what happened to Scout. So from his perspective, RED finally pushed nature too far and it blew up in his face. Resulting in RED Heavy loosing his mind and attacking.
That’s also why he hesitates to run away from the big Hoovy; he might be in hearty agreement with defeating RED Medic and leave BLU alone. But that’s not the case, and so the context changes from “this guy no longer serves RED” to “this guy has lost the plot altogether, he’s just attacking anybody’.
We, the tf2 fans know that this isn’t how RED Heavy acts; he actually didn’t question Medic’s loyalty in comic 6 and was ride or die, so if anything he’d still be docile to RED. But nobody on BLU team knows that.
And BLU’s doctor believes that something terrible will happen to RED if he doesn’t stop messing with the powers that be, even though he has no idea about the demonic deal.
#tf2#emesis blue#character analysis#tf2 medic#tf2 heavy#Honestly BLU team would have no idea that RED team has their chill moments#I mean RED Medic stole their Spy’s living head and kept him from respawning for at least a few days.#Same reason RED Sniper is so creepy in this movie. He got brought back irl
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BAND AU??
Man you're going to make me freak out fr
Well now the Big question, what kind of music they play? I see las into rock maybe metal and that edgy music, but i don't really think on luffy liking it, as someone obsesed with instruments i love the dinamic of bass and singer, since the bass Is low and the voice Is loud
Also who else play? It would be cool to kid to play the guitar to be like the worst trio but since he has a Big hand, and no 2nd hand (lol) he probably would play drums i Guess (?) Or maybe another straw hat?
i saw another band au so that's what i'm using as reference but Is kidlaw and i don't know If you would like it, anyway i love both of the au (i don't have deep thinks about the ships i see them dying alone lol they are so ugly (i love them))
AHHHH HI HELLO I CAN FINALLY ANSWER THIS.
I think the fic answers the kind of music they play, Polar Tang is mostly rock and Thousand Sunny is mostly pop! Law on the bass will own me forever.
They each have their own band, Polar Tang is Law on bass & lead vocals, Shachi on guitar & backup vocals, Bepo on drums, peng on keyboard/misc. thousand sunny loof sings, Usopp on drums, zoro on guitar, sanji on keyboard/etc!! But other straw hats play too, robin and Franky are a duo and open for them often. Usopp is the main lyricist with loof giving ideas and themes he wants to sing about. Both of them are credited for writing most of their songs, cuz Usopp almost always is writing based off things exploded from luffy’s ideas and feedback. Law writes 100% of polar tang’s songs, writing is the reason he got into music.
You could probably gather from the fic but polar tang is mostly Mariana’s trench & matchbox 20 with a sprinkle of blue October
Thousand sunny points of ref (from my end, @blackyote we never boiled it down as specifically w them as we did w polar tang I think lol) are metro station, naethan Apollo, hot chelle rae, Ian McConnell
‘Hating stuff’ by Ian McConnell is the one song loof wrote fully on his own in early days of thousand sunny. Later he’s credited as the writer for the polar tang song ‘hell, at least” (irl by ghost daughter) which he wrote by himself as a song specifically for law to perform
ok I will shut up for now 🙈
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Giratina's Temple and the Celestica Ruins
aka Giratina/platinum clan theory is back (also sorry for using mspaint lmao)
So we all know about the Shrouded Ruins, yeah?
(This is the only spoiler warning for Pokemon Legends: Arceus you're gonna get)
Spooky. Ever-cloaked in mists and mystery, surrounded by black-stoned cairns like graves and home to the giant Odd Keystone that once (?) housed 108 souls. Very ghost-centric.
Well what if I told you it was a temple?
Greco-roman temples (and, problematic or otherwise the celestica are absolutely greco-roman coded) are constructed relatively uniformly, with an outer later of columns holding up the roof and an inner layer holding up an internal structure, providing additional support, ect.
We have a perfect in-game model to project from, too, in the Temple of Sinnoh (pre-explosion). You can see that some of the smaller columns are sometimes decorative - likely they held up torches or, in the case of the two nearest the 'altar,' offerings
So knowing that style and having the remaining structures we do see in-game, we can approximate a lay out of what the building may have looked like.
What makes this a temple, however, is more open to interpretation. My evidence to support that it is is actually the blue-tinged pedestals seen within the outline of the building - the place(s) of honor in any temple. Irl, the inner structure - the cella - was often fully-walled in, though sometimes this was constructed via wood and other materials that don't withstand time.
Now, ENORMOUS shout-out to pokemaniacchris and the incredible Crimson Mirelands Archeological Survey Project for a really detailed, in-character breakdown of the ruins structures throughout the mirelands. I can only assume the 'surveyors' hadn't reached Mt. Coronet yet in their explorations.
Pedestals like these (at least superficially similar) are found beneath dozens of statues around Mt. Coronet, including beneath Giratina, Palkia and Dialga in the Sacred Plaza area. Now, I know I'm supposed to be claiming that this is a temple to Giratina, but if we work on the assumption that the four pedestals corollate with Giratina, Palkia, Dialga, and Arceus, a new conclusion can, perhaps, be drawn:
That whoever built this temple saw all four of them on the same 'level' of power or -- and this is my hc taking over -- if the statues were placed in a certain orientation (see below) that they saw Arceus and Giratina on equal footing, with Dialga and Palkia one rank below.
And there is, imo, more evidence to support this disruption of the 'creation trio' into two pairs on equal footing, found in the Celestica Ruins! So, among the structures there are two notable, circular buildings that the Greeks also utilized, called tholoi (plural). Irl, tholoi were a mix of secular-use and small-scale temples, and seeing as these two are small (maybe 10ft across inside?) I would maintain the claim that they're small temples.
And they align/mirror each other just as the statues of Palkia and Dialga do.
This part becomes pure conjecture, but I like to think the smaller structures in the ruins might be other small-scale temples for the various mythicals, honoring each much as the Greeks honored a pantheon.
Lastly, the CMASP describes the "Gapejaw Bog Complex" as being potentially an entire agora all its own and I can't agree more. Such evidence would support the idea of there being two groups of Celestica (Note: Not the Clans.)
I actually found myself wondering if the mirelands weren't always quite so swampy, and instead flooded at some point in the past with the depressions around Gapejaw - left by housing foundations - filled in with swamp water.
At the end of the day, I think there's a lot of evidence that the Celestica revered Giratina as well as Arceus, Dialga and Palkia - at least early on. Something happened to cause this schism, and the Old Verses/Plate inscriptions point to an outburst of rage from Giratina -- though, in "pick a god (and pray)" I actually argue it was mispercieved on the part of the Celestica and this misperception is what caused Arceus to despair and withdraw.
Open to discussion!! fellow nerds please interact!!
#pla#pokemon legends arceus#celestica#celestica people#pokemon lore#giratina#arceus#volo#i also think there's a correlation between the ancient hero story's bolts of rage and alphas/hisuian pokemon aggression#specifically my internal timeline is that the schism predates everything purely on the secular/human level#arceus then empowered the noble pokemons' ancestors and fought the hero and believed humans were worthy of his blessing until the celestica#blamed giratina for the rage lightning and shattered the statue and maybe even drove the gira sect out#this dismayed arceus and it withdrew leaving the rage to fade but still linger and make hisui inhospitable#the celestica left (of their own volition imo) to seek out arceus and other knowledge and the clans came after#the clans saw only two statues (palkia and dialga) and picked sides but still upheld the tradition honoring the nobles#i imagine cogita being direct celestica (immortal or otherwise) and volo being gira clan descended or otherwise descended from the diaspora#the celestica then went to sinjoh/johto and so on and so forth#long post#reference
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Thinking about a fic idea from Dick’s POV about Jason taking his place at Bruce’s side except this is completely based on my own amalgamation of canon.
1.
It starts when Dick returns to Gotham post-Deathstroke hoping for some comfort and safety away from heroism for a bit and childhood familiarity with Bruce only to find out that not only did Batman have absolutely no clue Robin was kidnapped and assumed dead, Bruce had even taken in another kid with black hair and blue eyes. He’s only had Jason for like two months apparently, and they’re already making plans for adoption.
Probably the worst part about this whole thing is that Bruce didn’t even think about Dick, the kid he’d had for almost nine years at this point, at all. (Dick doesn’t acknowledge Bruce’s all-consuming fear for Dick’s safety in the entire almost nine years they known each other. He doesn’t think about how Bruce’s overbearing, over controlling tendencies was Bruce caring too much. It must have eaten at him, not knowing how Dick was. Jason will remember Bruce’s ever present concern for the Golden Child.)
Dick can’t bring himself to resent either of them. He was the one who destroyed all of Batman’s surveillance, yelled at Bruce for trying to keep an eye on him, then didn’t even check in to let Bruce know he was anything other than dead or alive. Of course Bruce wouldn’t know anything that wasn’t always public knowledge. The kid also idolizes Robin, and Dick wouldn’t begrudge a kid out of a safe and loving home just because it was his first.
Dick doesn’t even try. He just goes straight to Alfred then leaves later that evening with a tin of cookies for the Teen Titans.
2.
Some months later, Dick sees a Gotham Gazette article about “Robin spotted in Gotham!” with a super blurry smear of yellow, red, and green chasing after another blurry smear that kind of looks like Batman. Dick storms back to Wayne Manor, intending to bury the fuck out of Batman for letting his shiny new son use his name, only to find out that no, actually, the truth is a little more complicated than just that. Apparently, Batman got injured or whatever, and while he was on bed rest, some knock-off Batman was running around Gotham. Jason more or less grabbed a shitty Robin Halloween costume from some costume store (because of course there would be shitty Halloween costumes of irl heroes) and chased down the fake Batman. (I am so obsessed with pre-crisis Nocturna but I’ll hold myself back here)
Afterwards, Bruce begrudgingly agreed to accept Jason as a vigilante since this was like the third time Jason had stopped a crime all on his own (the first time being Ma Gunn’s crime school) and Bruce would really prefer Jason do crime fighting from the safety of Batman’s cape. By the time Dick saw the article and made his way to Gotham, Jason was still trying to design his own vigilante uniform and come up with names (his ideas are terrible). Dick is honestly so tired of being angry that he just sighs and goes “you know what, I want to cut all ties with Batman. It’s not like he wants anything to do with me either. Jason, do you want to be Robin?”
Dick becomes Nightwing, a kryptonian legend. Aside from the OG Titans and some of the founding JL members, Nightwing has no connections to Gotham and especially not to Robin.
Sometimes, Dick Grayson visits Alfred and goes back to Titans Tower with a bag of homemade food. Sometimes, he brings some soulless souvenir as a late/early birthday/holiday present for Jason. He avoids Bruce each time.
3.
When Jason died, Dick was on a mission in space. He missed the funeral by a whole month. When he found out, he and Bruce scream at each other about shit knows what. Something about how he deserves to know when a kid dies in his suit with his name. Something about how Dick didn’t even care about Jason. Something about how it all was Bruce’s fault. Neither of them remember the words exchanged, but it ended with Bruce slapping Dick and the menacing silence that followed.
4.
Things don’t get better. Tim appears, pulling Dick back to Gotham and saying “Batman needs Robin. He’s going to get himself killed.” Apathy buries the feeling of grieving a still living not-dad. He’s already crossed the stage of acceptance. Batman can die for all he cares. It’s not his job (not his place) to help Bruce.
Nightwing still gets roped into saving Batman from Two-Face. Tim still steals the Robin uniform and saves them both.
Batman looks at Tim. He’s done this song and dance before. He doesn’t even try to stop Tim and just goes “fine.” Nightwing thinks “I won’t let this one down. I’ll be a good brother, mentor, predecessor to this one. I’ll deserve to go to this one’s funeral.”
Bruce attempts to reach out one more time. Dick finds himself living closer to Gotham than he has in a long time. Undercover work makes his skin crawl — the blood on his hands never seems to wash off — but weeding out the Bludhaven Police Department feels almost like a vacation where he can pretend to be Dick Grayson, normal member of society, instead of Nightwing/Robin. (It’s the closest Bruce gets to being reassured of Dick’s safety.)
5.
Life goes by. Dick and Bruce fight again and again. Batman and Nightwing fight side by side and back to back. Bruce and Dick stitch each other up in the Batcave and let bygones be bygones.
The Red Hood appears. Dick never really knew Jason all that well. He wonders if Bruce ever thought his dearly departed son was capable of committing such atrocities. Barbara says Jason had a darkness in him even before. She refused to elaborate further.
Bludhaven gets nuked. Jason disappears.
Dick returns to Gotham, to Wayne Manor. While he heals, Bruce sits at his bedside and Tim and Cass cuddle up against him. They’re just a pile of bats and birds basking in each other’s presence and the steady heartbeats that prove they’re alive.
Dick realizes that he hasn’t heard Bruce laugh in a long, long time.
6.
Their life is hard. Things happen. Death happens. Life happens.
They’re all still alive. Somehow. Despite all attempts otherwise. Life has settled, kindly. Things aren’t getting worse. Sometimes, Dick thinks it might be getting better.
Dick sits with Jason at the kitchen table. They’re technically not supposed to bring mask stuff into the manor, but Dick is too immersed in this case to set it down while he makes a sandwich at 2AM. Jason is eating straight from the pickle jar. Dick know for a fact that Jason is only doing that because Dick can see him and he’s just being an asshole. Jokes on him. Dick is just happy Jason is alive and comfortable enough to be an asshole in stately Wayne Manor’s kitchen.
Dick doesn’t know what compels him, but completely unprompted, he says it anyway.
“I used to hate you.”
Jason doesn’t even falter. He just glances up, bites through his pickle, and deadpans,
“No shit.”
Dick can’t help but grin. “Yeah? I thought I was hiding it pretty well.”
Jason raises an eyebrow. “For my 13th birthday, you gave me a keychain from some NYC gift shop that spelled ‘J-a-c-e-n’.”
#personal#dc#batfamily#batman#dick grayson#clearing out my drafts#and found this#no idea where I was going with it#but feel free to read it anyway#jason todd#bruce wayne#dreamlessblurb
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tennisblr exchange/fest: follow-up poll and questions
thanks to everyone who showed enthusiasm for a potential tennisblr fic/art/fanworks event!!
about 75% of respondents who expressed interest in participating indicated that it would depend on timing and format, so here are some questions about timing and format.
important note: if you too are mainly on tumblr, you should know that there is ALSO a fic exchange happening via the tennis rpf discord!
my Vision was for a multimedia event—currently thinking fic, art, and edits/fanvids tho see below on that—so planning to move forward in some form but when/how is up in the air. open questions about format below the cut—namely, exchange vs fest. thoughts welcome in replies or via dm/ask if you prefer!
i was initially envisioning a classic secret gift exchange via the ao3 platform. (you are matched with a recipient -> you create a gift for them -> you post your gift to the anon exchange collection on ao3 -> the exchange collection goes live -> creator names are revealed.) a few cons here: everyone has to get an ao3 account, ao3 isn't the ideal platform for graphics and video. also depending on how unique your artistic style is, posting anon might be sort of besides the point. lmao.
having said that, the one major advantage ao3 has is great admin tools—particularly, mods/admins can see who has finished and posted their gift. this is important because the worst-case scenario for a gift exchange is that someone ghosts their recipient, and if it's up to each participant to post their work to their own tumblr, this becomes exponentially more likely. no matter how many check-ins there are.
so if it's an exchange ao3 is the way to go. however the other option is NOT an exchange but an open prompt fest, which could also be fun!! i'm personally fond of the exchange format (when you're creating for someone i think you're a little more motivated to think about people/ships/ideas that might not have otherwise occured to you) but maybe we don't need two??? an open fest would also allow for more people to participate on the fly, as irl allows, and potentially for people to create a wider variety of work like moodboards, playlists, etc.
eta: what i mean by open prompt fest: everyone submits prompts (as general or specific as you want, e.g. "anything focused on zhang zhizhen", "sincaraz uni au", "naomi osaka edit to number one fan") -> the mod/admin blog posts all the prompts anonymously -> you create based on whatever prompts inspire you -> you post during the posting period!
this is possibly too deep in the weeds for most people to care lol but if you have thoughts i'd be happy to hear them!
(and yes once timing format etc is decided on there will be a dedicated blog... just waiting to roll that out until further decisions are made. @oof-ouch-yikes-stripes is going to help out with admin and ideally we'll get one more person on board!!)
#tennisblr#(not so)#hypothetical tennisblr fanworks exchange#tennis rpf#have i myself joined the tennis rpf discord? no. because im chicken.#but YOU could
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I haven't shared any random Bobby/Don ideas lately and I'm procrastinating working at my job rn I have several for "Don away at/immediately after the war" that I'm not convinced I'll ever write into a full fic because I have a weak heart (cries, do not separate them!).
I figured I might as well share them here, since otherwise they may never see the light of day (that being said, maybe if y'all like them enough, I can be convinced 👀).
Anyway here we go, my Bobby/Don war times head cannons:
Before Don leaves, Bobby gives him a ring to wear. He had his father make a pair, with "Moch" and "Hume" engraved on the inside. Bobby keeps the Hume one and gives Don the Moch one. He asks Don to wear it on his ring finger and claim to be married while he's away.
They write letters to each other obviously, and Bobby always just signs his as "B.", so the content can still be lovey/candid and Don can claim the letters are from a girl with a B name if needed.
Because I am weak of the heart, even in my head cannons, I imagine Don doesn't really see much of the actual war front because his engineering skills are what is put to use (I think that was a thing irl?). He has mixed feelings about this, some guilt, some frustration that he's essentially just doing his same job but forced to do it far away from home/Bobby. Bobby is grateful that Don isn't facing any danger, even if he realizes it's selfish.
Similarly, Don very selfishly is glad that Bobby couldn't join the army because of his health issues.
Bobby relies on friends a lot for support while Don is away. Joyce of course, because it's me, but also some of the other guys who couldn't enlist. They all know about Bobby and Don's relationship at this point.
I have an idea that is pretty much the closest to an actual fic plot of Don figuring out that another guy in his unit is gay and they befriend each other. It would include letters between Don and Bobby of them talking about it discretely.
Now, when Don returns when the war is over, nsfw but I imagine the two of them just fucking ravish each other. Like Bobby at one point is like "you better not expect to leave this house, this bed, for at least 3 days."
Related to above but the bullet was getting to long: They keep swapping between really hot/horny "meaningless" sex and super emotional lovemaking. They figure out early on that they have to decide/tell each other which it's gonna be so they're both on the same page lol.
After the war they still wear the rings :') maybe they have to switch them to the middle finger or right hand instead, since they live together and clearly not with wives, but still, they know what the rings mean.
I think that's it! Sorry for any heartache if you're like me and thinking about it for too long makes your heart hurt 🙏 knowing me, even if I ever wrote it I'd somehow manage to turn it into fluff lol.
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I made a modern adaptation of some R&J scenes (2.4 and 3.1) for a film project, and just had to share some of my favorite moments, in no particular order
“Queen Mab get to you again?”
- Benvolio, to Mercutio
The film was called Queen Mab, and it’s centered around Mercutio, with an emphasis on his dreams and hints to a time loop situation?
There was SO MUCH DOMESTIC BENCUTIO YOU HAVE NO IDEa
Like, Ben wakes Mercutio up and calls him sUnShiNe before handing him water
Also, he calls Mercutio “Merc” a few times throughout the film
All of the characters names are shortened in the script purely because I didn’t want to type them every time (Tybalt=Ty, Benvolio=Ben, Mercutio=Merc, Romeo=Ro, and Juliet was just Juliet)
Ben is CONSTANTLY checking his phone for texts from Romeo like he’s so worried poor guy
Meanwhile Merc is tormenting him
“I can see it now:
Here lies Romeo. Died from being left on read.”
- Mercutio, about Romeo’s crush on Rosaline
Ben extends an arm to Merc as they leave, and he takes it before grabbing his dagger
When they go to find Romeo, Ben brings a notebook with him that disappears once the Merc and Tybalt fight starts
Ben is wearing a shirt that says “MERCUTIO IS MY HOMEBOY”
a necklace with a purple gem (👀)
a cute blue and green jacket
and a beanie that does not fit properly at all
Meanwhile Merc is wearing a purple MIT shirt
When Ben and Merc spot Romeo, they hide behind a tree like those classic cartoons where you can only see their upper half sticking out of the tree
Our Romeo & Juliet were in a production of Sound of Music together as Maria and Von Trapp respectively so when I told them to act in love in the distance, they just started doing the Laendler choreography
Ben shows Tybalt’s “challenge” for Romeo to Merc via his phone, which implies that Tybalt texted Benvolio and was like “hey man can you let your cousin know I wanna fight him?”
We needed a shot of our Tybalt appearing behind Ben & Merc, and Ty was insistent that he climb a nearby tree and jump out of it
That shot took 15+ takes before we even got to his part, so he spent the better part of half an hour sitting in a tree waiting for his queue.
He jumped down too early during one take and had to re-climb the tree
Merc boops Ben several times throughout the film, and we had a few very flirtatious takes that didn’t make the Final Cut because we kept breaking character
“Careful, Good Benvolio, your irrefutable temper is showing”
- Merc to Ben when he complains about Romeo’s terrible decision-making skills
He calls him “Benny boy”
During one take, he accidentally said “bunny boy” and I told him he could definitely do that purposely if he wanted
Tybalt had recently done a production of R&J, so he asked to add the “peace be with you” line into the script, which I 100% supported, we spent a while during the shoot just quoting R&J back and forth, and he noticed all of my references in the script
Romeo was instructed to enter the Tybalt scene after a specific line, so he hid around the corner and FULLY RAN into the scene yelling “GUYS GUYS YOU’LL NEVER BELIEVE WHAT I—“
Romeo is taller than both Ben and Merc, and he almost tackles both during his entrance
Oh my gosh Romeo and Tybalt have some kind of bromance going on IRL which is so fun but it was so difficult to get the two of them to pay attention because they were just hanging out with each other
Romeo had a line that goes “woah, Tybalt, calm down” and instead he said “Yoooo, Tybalt, chill out man” which made all of us break
When Tybalt confronts Romeo, you can hear a bird in the background, that stops the second Ty pulls out his dagger, which was accidental but iconic
I choreographed a sword fight, but Merc and Ty mostly improvised, they had a lot of fun
Our Juliet filmed the whole scene by the way, along with most of the other scenes
Also, in the script she had one line, in which she was supposed to say something with the word Capulet, and she kept joking to everyone that she was already off book
I ended up cutting the line for convenience and plot purposes, sorry Jules 😭
“Capulet”
- Not Juliet, since the line got cut
Romeo & Juliet joked about going to marriage counseling after they were struggling to film one of the scenes (J on camera, R with the boom mic)
They traded jobs after J accidentally filmed R for the entire take
In between shots, Ty and Merc were stabbing mushrooms with their daggers, Romeo was throwing rocks at a spider, and Juliet and I were just like, watching all of it happen
We had fake blood for Merc to put on his hand, and it ended up staining his hand so he spent like 10 minutes washing it off afterwards
When Merc dies, Ben holds his hand and rests his face against Merc’s head (also, he fully dies in Ben’s lap)
Then we went back and filmed the first scene and lemme tell you Mercutio is iconic but he was so so so bad at waking up
He kept asking me “how am I supposed to wake up???? How does one wake up scared???” And I was like “I don’t know man!!!!!”
Some lines taken directly from the play include “Romeo, my cousin Romeo!” (2.1) “A challenge, on my life” (2.4) “Come sir, your passado” (3.1) and of course, “Peace be with you” (3.1)
Also, Merc still calls Ty a ratcatcher, and Ty calls out to Ben and Merc by saying gentlemen
Yeah, it was a lot of fun. Took 4 hours of filming for a 4 minute long film, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
I played Benvolio by the way. Probably should have mentioned that sooner.
#romeo and juliet#bencutio#benvolio montague#mercutio x benvolio#mercutio escalus#juliet capulet#tybalt capulet#romeo x juliet#romeo x tybalt
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December Creator of the Month: Oh-So-Youre-a-Nerd
Each month, CFWC highlights one of our talented fanfic writers or artists, and this month’s creator of the month is @oh-so-youre-a-nerd . We're very excited because Ascindio is our very first artist to be highlighted! We hope you will enjoy learning more about them and their work below! The writer is selected at random. More info can be found on the navigation page.
Quick Links:
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How do you want to be known on Tumblr?
Ascindio
More below...
1- When did you start playing Choices? What was the first book you played?
I started playing in 2016, I can't remember if I read Endless Summer or Rules of Engagement first, but I ended up deleting the app after like 2 weeks cause I couldn't stop buying diamonds 😅🤦
I re-downloaded it about, ohh idk 2 years ago?
2- When and why did you join Choices fandom?
I joined the Fandom specifically on Tumblr and specifically for It Lives Within, which happened to come out right after I read the first two books
3- How did you pick your blog name?
I always try to seem cool and mysterious when I meet people irl, and then as soon as I open my mouth, I ruin it with some niche trivia or something, and they say, “Oh, so you're a nerd.” 😂 Can't tell you how many times this exact phrase has been uttered to me.
4- Pull up the first post in your archive, and tell us about it!
This is the first Choices related post I made 😂 I was just thinking about the concept of what if characters make terrible decisions cause they're controlled by a player who is out of diamonds lol I was going to do a whole series of them (next was going to be lotr “fly on eagles to mordor?” *30 diamonds* or “simply walk”) but got lazy lol
5- Do you write fanfiction, create fan art, or are you one of those really gifted people who do both?
Only art. God, I WISH I wrote too. I've thought about trying cause I have so many ideas floating around in my head, but at the end of the day, I'd rather spend my free time drawing.
6- How long have you been creating for Choices and for any other fandoms?
For Choices, since early 2022
For other fandoms, since well, forever, but I only started posting around 2017/18
7- What is your favorite Choices book, and what is your favorite Choices book to create for?
Favorite Choices book is probably It Lives in the Woods. All of the characters were so interesting, I never got bored reading it, and it had an incredible twist that made sense but I still didn't see coming.
Favorite to create for is probably Blades of Light and Shadow though because I am such a sucker for the fantasy aesthetic.
8- Share your first Choices fanfic or fan art that you posted with us. Do you still like it, or would you change it if you were creating it today?.
This isn't the first Choices art I made, but it IS the first I actually shared
And honestly, I DO still like it because I still remember the way I felt absolutely POSSESSED while drawing it (I hadn't drawn anything for *months*). I would definitely change the background, though. Those trees look like shit, and they're not even the correct type for the kind of forest they're in.
9- What is your favorite piece of fiction or art that you created?
My favorite Choices art I've done is probably this piece.
10- Do you have a fic/art that you didn’t expect to be well received, but it was? What about one you expected to do well but found it could use a little more love?
I definitely didn't expect this one to do well at all as it was so hastily drawn
And I was sad this piece didn't get more love, it was such a dope scene and I was so excited about how the sword turned out
11- If you could only draw one style or type of art for the rest of your life, what would it be and why?
I'm not sure if I'm interpreting the question right, but if I had to pick like a specific type of art, it would be digital, and I would want to do fan art. I have a hard time painting anything that I don't already have a deep connection with (so original art with no story behind it is usually a chore for me), and digital art is just so incredibly convenient and not messy and so so versatile.
12 - Do you ever recognize yourself in any of your MCs or in your writing?
Because I use fiction as a way to safely process trauma/ grief/ other big emotions, each MC I make has a small part of me, whichever part I feel the need to explore at the time.
There's an amazing quote by Patrick Rothfuss that I feel explains it perfectly.
It's from Wise Man's Fear
“These folk knew all about death. They killed their own livestock. They died from fevers, falls, or broken bones gone sour. Death was like an unpleasant neighbor. You didn’t talk about him for fear he might hear you and decide to pay a visit.
Except for stories, of course. Tales of poisoned kings and duels and old wars were fine. They dressed death in foreign clothes and sent him far from your door. A chimney fire or the croup cough were terrifying. But Gibea’s trial or the siege of Enfast, those were different. They were like prayers, like charms muttered late at night when you were walking alone in the dark. Stories were like ha’penny amulets you bought from a peddler, just in case.”
13 - What element of writing/art do you struggle with most?
I have a very difficult time making the poses seem natural and flowing. My all time favorite art is Baroque/Renaissance style and how fluid the poses are, how soft the skin looks, how delicately it's all done. Obviously, I will always have my own style, but those are things that I so want to incorporate but never seem to get quite right, and it drives me crazy 😂
14 - Do you have any neglected work you really want to finish?
Not really. I mean, I have a ton of unfinished work, but as soon as the window of inspiration passes, I just can't get myself to care enough about it to finish it (insert Jake the Dog, “now it's gone, and I don't care about it anymore!” )
15 - If someone you know in real life (who isn’t involved in fandoms) asked to see your work, would you let them? If yes, what would you show them first?
I would, and have. I typically show them whatever most rendered recent picture from my Instagram because I don't post any nsfw there and usually try to post only my prettier work for this specific reason haha. (As opposed to here, I post everything here, ain't NO ONE from real life invited to see my tumblr 😂)
16 - Are there any writers (published authors and/or fanfic writers) who influenced your writing or art? Are there any artists that influence you?
Writers: Brandon Sanderson, for sure. He's the reason I got back into art back in 2017 ish. His stories are just so emotional they push me to create. Same with @saibug1022, there is always at least one scene from every story he shares that I desperately want to draw to try to capture the emotions.
Artists: God, sooo many, here are just like my top 3 favorites and their instagrams.
Audra Auclair
Obsessed with her unique style, and specifically the way she draws eyelids and noses
f3lc4t
The way they draw those dripping, glowing wisps. I stare at their pieces for hours (no lie) trying to dissect them stroke by stroke to figure out how they do it.
Miho Hirano
Their art has a delicate whimsy-ness I would SELL MY SOUL to achieve
17- Which one of your creations would you like to see a fiction written about?
JC, this is the shit I DREAM of.
Definitely this one.
So this is love.
This little comic means a lot to me.
18- Do you write original fiction or create non-fandom art?
Very rarely, but I do, every so often. This is my favorite original piece.
20- What other hobbies do you have?
Gaming, singing, walking through the Cemetary with my wee daughter, reading, that's about it 🤷
21 - What’s your favorite emoji?
🙇
22: BONUS - tell us anything you’d like (if you want to).
I really wanted to say that I don't believe in “good” art and “bad” art (just ethical vs non-ethical). That being said, I know what it's like to hate your art, like soooo intimately. If you ever are feeling shit about your art, you can ABSOLUTELY message me (I don't care if we're mutuals or not, I don't care if we've never interacted before) and just say, “I am feeling shit about my art” and I will go through your art and tell you every specific thing I love about it and why it's wonderful. I am not joking; I am so so serious rn. 💗💗💗💗
#choices fic writers creations#playchoices#choices stories you play#cfwc creator of the month#oh-so-youre-a-nerd#choices fanart#playchoices fanart#december creator of the month
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omg I never see anyone talking about fukuzawa and kunikidas background but I agree with you so much I think he met him as a teenager if not younger. I've always liked to think that kunikidas parents know fukuzawa somehow and he kinda grew up knowing him. kunikidas whole background and family is such a mystery it drives me crazy
DUDE SAME HOLY SHIT I'm so curious about Kunikida's background because!! We know!! So little!! Like the only reason we know he used to be a math teacher is because he was literally working as one when Dazai's entrance exam happened - what was he doing before?? How did he discover he has an Ability?? Considering it's basically canon Abilities come from trauma, what even happened to him so his own manifested?
People talk about how Dazai is so careful on what he tells the agency but ngl, the agency know jack fucking shit about each other lmao. It's not just Dazai - we still have no clue what the fuck is up with the Tanizaki siblings or how Kunikida joined the agency. No one knew about Yosano's backstory before she shared it with Tanizaki and Kenji sans Ranpo and Fukuzawa because they RESCUED HER. Its confirmed no one sans Ranpo and Fukuzawa (possibly Yosano) know how the agency was founded in Untold Origins; and so much around Kenji is a mystery as well. We know about Atsushi because of his trauma dumping (as he deserves) and Kyouka because her joining the agency was so dramatic - everyone else though is far from an open book. Especially Kunikida.
Also - Kunikida's so fucking WEIRD, right?? Like people talk about him like he's the 'sane' one of the agency, but that's just because he's next to Dazai fucking Osamu, who makes anyone look normal. Kunikida is way too down with violence - hell, the first appearance we get of him he pins a starving orphan to the floor, it's noted he's not allowed to ask questions to clients because he gets violent, and he's told to cool it by Dazai of all people. Like?? He's passively suicidal with a HUGE guilt complex, and like, that obsession with his ideals can't come from nowhere. Like Kunikida's commitment to his ideals to the point of self destruction is shown to be bad for him, the center of his character and his flaws, so where does something like that come from? People also skip over the specifics of his moral code - because that's not clear cut either lmao. He breaks into weather stations because they reported wrong, steals cars when people have insurance, is just kinda like -_- when Atsushi and Kyouka are in danger in the start of the manga, and really, he's just... his morals don't align with the law. Period. Nor do they seem simple, despite how people want to read him.
So how the FUCK did that happen?
Because like I said, we know so little about Kunikida!
I really like the idea you said, about Kunikida having grown up knowing Fukuzawa! That's definitely interesting, I don't think I've heard that. It would make sense if Fukuzawa started training Kunikida early - because he's way too good for someone who started training at say, 18. In Dazai's Entrance Exam he wipes the floor with an opponent who has a significant weight and size advantage over him, and I actually think he could match Chuuya in terms of pure martial arts (maybe not beat, but it would definitely be a close fight without Abilities). That's too good for someone who only started training hardcore when he hit adulthood.
Also - I think Fukuzawa was the one who gave Kunikida his Ideals notebook. I don't think he was there when his Ability manifested or anything, but I do think he was the one who gave Kunikida that direction, that sense of purpose. It makes sense to me - Kunikida's dislikes have authority listed (considering the author irl, that makes sense), and he's got one of the most vulgar speech patterns in the series and comparatively rarely uses honorifics... yet he respects Fukuzawa so much?? He defers to him so much?? He's his successor, outright stated? What caused that type of loyalty, that type of deference?
Was Kunikida the first person to take an entrance exam, considering the agency was started for Ranpo and Yosano definitely didn't? What was his even like?? WHY did they make him the first one to take it, if he did?
Idk, I REALLY hope we get more on Kunikida's backstory soon. There's so much that's implied, and at the least I hope we get more on his relationship with Fukuzawa.
#please ask me about kunikida i have so many thoughts and rambles about him#bsd#kunikida doppo#bsd kunikida#doppo kunikida#bungo stray dogs#thanks for the ask!#fukuzawa yukichi#bsd fukuzawa#yukichi fukuzawa
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Hello again - Santa here! I just can’t stay away. I hope you are enjoying Feysand week, spooky season, and that beautiful autumn weather surrounds you!
You did such a good job of playing the build a fic game, I think you might be sneaking ever closer to Santa’s nice list! However, now I have several ideas kicking around and I would love to hear a little more from you to lock into the best present possible.
1. What do you love about Feysand? What are some of your favorite moments?
2. Is there a certain stage of their relationship you can’t get enough of? UTM, early ACOMAF, Velaris, post mating bond? Or maybe you’re interested in what’s happening after ACOSF?
3. Do you have any favorite headcanons or things you think we missed out on in canon?
Enjoy the rest of fabulous Feysand week giftee!
Santa, all I want is to be on your nice list 🥹. Happy Feysand week!!! I could write 300+ pages on these questions, but I don't think Tumblr will let me write a post that long. I think (I hope?) these answers will still give you plenty to work with, though.
1) The short version is that I love Feysand's unconditional acceptance and support for each other. I saw something about how the appeal behind enemies-to-lovers is that it means your partner saw you at your worst before they saw you at your best, and they loved you anyways. That's very true for Feyre and Rhys. I know some people, especially post-ACOSF, talk about Feyre being naive about Rhys's asshole-ness or being brainwashed by the mate bond. IMO, she's always seen the darkness, and she simply does not give a fuck. Rhys likewise recognized a similar darkness in her before she saw it in herself. Rhys will be a monster to protect the people he loves, and Feyre loves him for it because she's the same.
They're the ultimate ride-or-dies for each other. In ACOTAR, Rhys was ready to damn the world to protect Feyre. When he tried to scare her into leaving Prythian, he wasn't just condemning himself to Amarantha, but potentially damning everyone else to an eternity UTM, too. No cursebreaker, no freedom, right? Similarly, when Rhys dies in ACOWAR, Feyre is ready to daemati the other courts into bringing him back - a diplomatic nightmare in the long run, but she doesn't care. There's something undeniably selfish about their devotion to each other, but for me... it just scratches an itch that no other ship does.
I also adore the mentor/mentee dynamic in their relationship. Maybe it's the daddy kink in me, IDK. Growing up, Feyre hasn't really had someone who will not only be on her side, but also provide for her - she got parentified at 11. Both with Tam and Rhys, we see that she wants a partner who will provide for her if she needs it - the reason Feylin doesn't work and Feysand does is because Tamlin imposes that provision, and Rhys doesn't. Feyre wants room to do her own thing, but she wants to know that, when she needs it, she has someone who she can lean on. I'm obsessed with Rhys both wanting to be that person and with him wanting her to (literally) grow her own wings. He never holds things she doesn't know against her, and I think their personalities are endearing together in part because of their age/experience difference.
One of the songs that reminds me the most of them is Hozier's NFWMB, if that helps. I actually have a whole Feysand playlist here (the order is kinda important but only a little).
2) As far as favorite stages go (and favorite moments, to carry that over from your first question), I'm obsessed with ACOMAF and early ACOWAR. I've talked a little here about how I think Feyre is angry at Rhys in ACOMAF partially because she doesn't know what to do with her attraction to him, and here about how ACOMAF is about Feyre accepting and loving herself, not just accepting and loving Rhys. Both of these threads are a big part of why I love Feysand. IRL, People are messy, flawed, complicated, and almost always still loveable. I think ACOMAF Feysand embodies that perfectly.
I love the moment at the beginning of ACOMAF when Feyre overhears Ianthe suggesting they assassinate Rhys and she's horrified, because it shows how in denial she is. I love the confrontation with Lucien in the mountains because Feyre realizes she's willing to do something that she would have once considered unthinkable (hurt Lucien) to protect Rhys, and she's not upset by it. I love when they pretend the mating bond broke, because their ability to play off of each other shows how they really are birds of a feather.
That's also why I adore Feyre at the beginning of ACOWAR - she's being so wicked, but it's all her. Rhys isn't giving her input on her strategy. Her deception in the Spring Court also shows how much she's learned from Rhys.
3) I really wish we saw more of Feyre being a politician. E.g. Feyre holding court alone in the Hewn City, putting Keir in his place like in the beginning of this fic I'm currently slobbering over from @rosanna-writer. In general, I'm obsessed CoN/dark!Feysand, and I wish SJM leaned into their dark sides more.
I also think we got robbed of a Helion/Rhys/Feyre threesome in canon. (I'm generally intrigued by Rhys and Helion's definitely-not-totally-platonic history, but this post is already pretty long, so that's for another time). Sometimes, I also wish that we saw Feyre and Tamlin sitting down to talk about everything that happened. I'm kinda of two minds about that, though - I don't think Feyre is the one who needs that conversation in order to find closure, and I don't want her to talk to Tam just because he needs her to.
I don't know if we'll ever see adult Nyx in canon, but I would love to eventually see teen/young adult Nyx, especially during his HL training. I want to know how he reconciles the tender, loving parents he has behind closed doors with their sometimes-brutal public personas. I want to know what he thinks of the mythos surrounding his family and how he navigates intercourt relations (especially relations with the Spring Court?) as he takes on more and more responsibility. I want to know what he thinks of Eris: they're both princes, but where Nyx would do anything to protect his parents, Eris is willing to take a blade to his father.
UMMMM I'm trying to think if there's anything else. I think there is, but that's all that comes to mind right now.
Santa, I'm so sorry for the late response! I hope you're as excited to catch up on all the Feysand week fics as I am :).
#feysand#feyre archeron#rhysand#feysand fanfic#feysand fic#z's acotar takes#acotar gift exchange#acotar
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hiii sending asks now lol
yeah it would makes sense that ash is more focused on due to popularity esp since his vids and streams are like. adhd fuel lmao, but at the same time it doesnt give a Full satisfying answer for me cause theres plenty of popular/less popular ships out there that have respect for both parties but maybe its just cause swagdoons is one of the biggest and oldest ships on lifesteal lol
honestly personally i wouldnt Mind the femboy red jokes if there were at least a somewhat equal amount in regards to ash but often ive found that ppl are much less likely to do that with ash for whatever reason even if they made the same jokes with red like??? whats going on here... and honestly big same on getting girlboy vibes from ash
and i havent heard that zamswagdoons interppretations (mainly cause i have yet to see zamswagdoons fancontent lol) and whattt their asses are nawt fawning over ash esp together lmao??? and youre so right on zam and ash bullying each other before killing red, i have no idea how that dynamic can be misinterpreted considering theyve been pretty consistent in that regard even if theres the very occasional affection thrown in there lmao???
Tbh I get that, I kind of feel as if 2022 and like early-mid 2023 Swagdoons didn't have that inequality present so??? I have no idea where it sprung up from?? I know there was a difference in popularity between 2022 early/mid 2023 and late 2023-2024 with Reddoons since I'm pretty sure he was popular during that time? And now he's not so much. So I ?? Seriously do not know why that is?? I kind of just assumed it was because Ash is more popular than Red and it feels like . Red is only brought up in convo cuz of Ash, but like yeah. I feel like the equality of the ship has gone up and down throughout the years I guess Yeah it's odd to me, especially cuz Ash seems to be more fem than Red in outward appearances. Also surprises me cuz people seem to see Ash as buff? Yeah sorry that dude is a twink. Have you seen him IRL he looks like a light breeze could swoop him up. The femboy jokes are always iffy with me mostly because in the spaces I interact in femboy is seen as a slur against tfem people (cuz it's mostly co-opted in the porn industry to refer to transwomen afaik) and The Worst People You Know always make femboy jokes so it's like. Err. Plus I just don't find it that funny. YAYY Someone gets it..Ash has always been such a beautiful girl that is also a boy to me and I don't get why ppl on LSTWT see him as a he/they'er. When people start referring to Ash as a pretty girl and start using she/her on him thw world will start Healing Yeah there's like. One of the first Zamswagdoons fanart I've seen was of Zam and Red kissing Ash. To be fair this person has a track record of being insanely inaccurate when it comes to characterizing ships (They made a Ashzam one where it said that Zam was the. Only person that was ever truly kind to Ash?? Are we?? Looking at the same ship? And they made the UU!Swagdoons img too) and then I see it again with Zam and Red posing with Ash. I'm not really sure how the dynamic can be perceived that way but I assume it is just because of Ash Needs To Be The Focal Point again. And yeah their dynamic has been pretty clear-cut and consistent even with their minimal affection towards each other so I 1. Don't really get soft ZSD and 2. Am not sure why Zam and Red would fawn over Ash. Sure Red could because that dude is a terrible simp but?? Why is Zam doing that as well?? Especially minute with ZSD's dynamic in mind, because while Red does have an amount of obsession with Zam and Ash, it's more one-sided because Zam and Ash are too busy killing each other and then killing Red to care. It's kind of like Zam and Ash fighting, Red thinking of Ash and Zam kissing, and then Ash and Zam noticing that he's there and killing him. Not Soft or Do They Have a Focus on Ash..
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Until then..
✢ Plot: Everyone has noticed how Swiss is going absolutely crazy on stage this tour. And I am going to ruin it for everyone and write angst about it because I'm an asshole like that.
or; how swiss handles his fear of abandonment after aether got sent back to the pit.
✢ genre: angst
✢ warnings: panic attack (sort of?)
✢ a/n: this doesn't follow my actual headcanons, i just wanted to explore this idea a bit. Also please don't apply this to the irl situation. This is pure fiction and is not meant to be taken any other way! I write about the fictional characters, not the real life people behind them.
Mountain eyed the multi ghoul carefully from where he was sitting in the dressing room. The other ghoul was heaving and sweaty, his shoulders raising and falling dramatically with each breath.
Mountain waited for the other ghouls to leave before he cornered Swiss.
"What's up with you.", he asked in a serious voice, the multi ghoul jumping slightly. He had clearly been in his thoughts.
"What do you mean?", Swiss asked, pulling a clean shirt over his head, carefully manuvering his horns through the collar.
"On stage.", Mountain said, crossing his arms, "You're... different."
Swiss turned to the earth ghoul fully, cracking his signature smile but it didn't quite reach his eyes. "Enjoying the show, big guy?", he tried to joke but Mountain knew something was off. The way Swiss moved, how he held his guitar, how he threw himself to the floor, it all felt... strange. Admittedly, Swiss was known for his weird dances, shimmies and the overall feral-ness when he performed. The fans loved it, too. But something had changed and Mountain couldn't quite put his finger on it, he just knew that it did.
Mountain could see the smile on Swiss' lips waver for a second. It was unlike Swiss to not tell the others if something bothered him. He was tired? He would complain about it. He was mad about something another ghoul did? He would talk it out with the other ghoul to clear the air. He was sad? He would ask for a hug or go to another ghoul's room to cuddle.
Swiss had always been open about how he felt. He knew that communication was key and he was good at it.
"I see you out of the corner of my eyes the whole show. There's just something different about the way you present yourself. Satanas, you literally fell full body into the floor. I have never seen you do that before."
Swiss' smile dropped while Mountain was talking, his eyes distant and lost in thought but he quickly composed himself, scoffing jokingly. "Where have you been for the last years, mounty? I always mess around on stage. It's what the people like about me. I just stepped up my game this tour. People grow tired of the same old shit, they want to see something new and I delivered.", he explained but the earth ghoul didn't buy it. He didn't know whether he should push the multi ghoul, though. If Swiss was not telling him the truth, maybe it was direspectful to pry? Or maybe he was reading too much into it.
"You know you can talk to us if something is upsetting you, right?", the tall ghoul asked and Swiss rolled his eyes with a smile. "Of course. And you know I would if there was actually something wrong. Now go to the others, I'm gonna need a little longer."
-
Mountain had not pried after that. He just watched Swiss as the shows went on, watched how he moved, how he acted.
And it still didn't sit right with him.
Each ritual, Swiss got worse. He would throw himself to the floor, would drop to his knees like he was in pain, holding his head. The fans loved every second of it, liking the act of the feral ghoul he was portraying. But after each show, Swiss would stumble to the dressing rooms, clearly exhausted. He was very obviously unwell.
The rest of the ghouls had noticed the change in his performance as well, had asked Swiss why he was trying to be an overachiever recently. Swiss had grown visibly irritated by their teasing and had left to his bunk early. The other ghouls had exchanged confused looks but they just figured that they had hurt his ego.
"What was up with that?", Dewdrop had asked, kicking his feet up on the table, the joint he had been sharing with Swiss between his fingers.
"Maybe he's actually hurt.", Rain tried, "He's really been giving his all on stage lately."
"Yeah," Cumulus agreed, "He's soaked when he leaves the stage. I've never seen him so worn out after a show until this tour."
The others had responded with hums of agreement, wondering what had changed.
"Maybe he is trying to distract himself.", Mountain said, all eyes trained on him as he spoke. "From.. you know.. what happened with Aether.". The silence that followed was filled with sadness and grief.
"Maybe.", Rain whispered, his eyes staring into nothingness as his heart felt heavy in his chest.
-
That night Swiss laid awake in his bed, staring at the ceiling with tired eyes, but sleep eluded him.
He felt shaky even as he laid completely still. Maybe it was the last bit of weed flowing through his body, or maybe his body was just really exhausted from today's ritual.
He had heard the others talk about Aether after he had left and an uncomfortable feeling had spread through his chest. His heart had started hammering like he was being chased, his body suddenly so sweaty he had to remove the blanket. Fear. True and utter fear crashed through the multi ghoul as he laid in his bed, thinking about Aether. Swiss felt wetness prickle in his eyes but he blinked it away quickly.
Aether had always given his all, had played the guitar skillfully and had entertained the crowd. But still it wasn't enough. Still, he got sent back to the pit.
Maybe...- Maybe if Swiss tried harder, gave everything he's got, he would be safe. Safe from being sent back to the pit. Safe from being abandoned.
He started shaking harder, his heart pounding painfully in his ribcage. Fuck, he had to be better. He had to perform better than before, had to charm the crowd, had to show Papa that he was good at what he was doing.
Had to prove that he was worthy of being there.
He quickly turned to his side, hoping that the change in position would stop the shaking at least, but it didn't.
Maybe he could try to make the fans love him as much as possible. He could be lewd, could be a flirt, so that they cheered the loudest for him. Maybe then the clergy would know that he was devoted enough. That he was the right ghoul for this!
His tail curled around his leg for comfort but instead he started to feel claustrophobic. He quickly released it from around himself but it didn't help. He felt like the bunk was closing in on him, like he would get squished if he didn't move, like he would- oh satanas he would- surely not- he would not-
With a gasp Swiss leapt out from his bunk, landing noisily on the floor of the bus, his heart still racing in his chest. Sweat dripped down his neck and he felt the eyes of his mates on him.
His shoulders heaved with each painful breath and he nearly collapsed when he felt a hand on his back. He whirled around in shock instead, looking into the worried eyes of Mountain.
"Swiss.", he started, his voice calm and collected but clearly worried for his packmate. "Come here.", was all he whispered before dragging the multi ghoul into a tight hug. He didn't return it at first, but slowly his hands found the taller ghoul's back. After a minuted Mountain released Swiss from his embrace and watched him with sad eyes.
Mountain didn't speak, he knew the words laid on Swiss' tongue.
"I-..." Swiss looked up at Mountain, his eyes filled with tears. "I am afraid."
Mountain's warm hand returned to Swiss' shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze. "What are you afraid of?", the earth ghoul asked carefully.
"That what happened to Aether could happen to me.", he admitted and his voice broke in the middle.
Mountain swallowed his own emotions as he encouraged Swiss to continue speaking.
"Aether was good. Aether was liked by the crowd. And yet-..." A deep breath. "And yet, he was sent back like he was nothing. Like he was just another ghoul working for the clergy. How do I know it will not happen to me? What if one day Papa wakes up and I am not good enough anymore? What if one day, they find some other multi ghoul because they want something 'fresh', something 'new' and 'exciting'?"
The other ghouls stared in silence. Swiss was right. Each of them could be replaced any day. There was no knowing what Sister Imperator or the higher glercy members had planned. There had been no sign that Aether would have to leave. It had happened out of nowhere. Hell, even their Papa could get retired by the clergy any second. It had happened in the past and it would surely happen again, they knew that. It didn't make it any less daunting.
"Swiss, there is nothing you can do.", Mountain started. "What happened to Aether could happen to all of us. I know it's scary but no matter how you act, how you present yourself, how much you try to be perfect, it wouldn't change a thing for them. Aether didn't get sent back because he wasn't good enough. He got sent back because the clergy follows some weird plan that we have no knowledge of. There is a possibility that we all will get sent back at one point, yes. But don't ever think it is because you aren't enough."
Swiss felt a weird mixture of dread and calmness. Mountain was right, they could be next any second but it wouldn't mean that he had failed, had not lived up to expectations. It was unavoidable and there was something calming about that.
He nodded, wiping a tear from his cheek with a deep inhale.
"Until then, we have each other."
#wrote this at night I'm tired help#not beta read woops#the band ghost#swiss#swiss ghoul#multi ghoul#swiss angst#swiss ghoul angst#multi ghoul angst#ghost band#ghost bc#nameless ghouls#ghouls#rain ghoul#sodo#dewdrop ghoul#mountain ghoul#nameless ghouls angst#ghost band angst#ghost fanfiction#aether ghoul#ghost ghouls#nameless ghoul#angst
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