#but i have enough to guarantee i'll get him even if i lose! so at least i know i'll get him

[operationtimeguard]

day 45 and as this will be the final day before baizhu’s banner: i thought it would be nice to redraw this image i did for albedo’s banner ^^

also fun fact! at the time of that drawing there was 3 characters i wanted to pull for: albedo, eula and baizhu :,) (i got both albedo and eula in 2.3 o7 and an extra albedo!)

wishing my fellow baizhu savers the best luck on his banner as well as the same to any ganyu or kaveh wanters ^^

[daddy-dotcom]

Bet on Me

Spencer Reid x Sugarbaby Reader

Spencer Reid never loses, especially when the prize is you.

Summary: Reader is a sugar baby for Reid's opponent, and he bets a night with her if he loses to Reid.

Warnings: Smut, unprotected p in v, bj, swearing ig?

----------------------------------------------

This wasn't the first time he'd done this. Granted, the Boss only did it when he was losing a lot of money and needed to sacrifice his "lucky charm." However, this was the first time he bet me and lost, to a man half his age nonetheless. I never liked being used as a gambling chip, but he lost so rarely that I didn't dwell on it too much. The man he was playing only gave us his first name, Spencer, and damn was he good. If I didn't know any better, I would say he was counting the cards. He was slightly cocky, but not in the way that the Boss's usual opponents were. He knew he was good, but he wasn't arrogant. There was an air of confidence to him, almost as if he was guaranteed to win, which was exactly what he did. I'd never seen the Boss this upset before, practically throwing a tantrum on the casino floor. But Spencer won fair and square, more specifically, he had won me. 

Under normal circumstances, he would have bet on me as a last resort against some other equally sleazy old man. He would have won and I wouldn't have to worry about the idea of sleeping with a man who I didn't know and who had zero respect for boundaries. While the Boss wasn't exactly in his prime anymore, at least he paid me well and we had strict boundaries in place. But whenever he bet on me, I had no idea what I would be getting into. Something about Spencer being young immediately eased my nerves, especially since he was so lanky and boyish. He was probably close to my age, but you would never be able to tell because he looked like he was barely old enough to be gambling. 

"Just go on and get it over with, doll, I'll pick you up in the morning," the Boss said irritably. 

I made my way over to Spencer, who was the only one left sitting at the poker table. He sat quite awkwardly for a man who had just swept the entire table. All of the confidence from before had completely melted away. 

"Well it looks like I'm yours for the night, Spencer. I'm (Y/N) by the way." 

I leaned against the poker table, making sure to show off my best assets. If I was going to have to spend the night with him, I at least wanted to have some fun. Between my day job and being a part-time sugar baby, I didn't have the time or energy to date much. So I planned on taking full advantage of the situation. Even if I didn't end up sleeping with Spencer, there was something about him that made me want to get to know him. 

"Nice to meet you, (Y/N)" he said, and I could tell he was avoiding my gaze. This was most likely because from where he was sitting, his line of sight was directly at my boobs. 

"C'mon Spencer, let me buy you a drink."

"Shouldn't I be the one buying you a drink?" he asked, looking puzzled. 

"Looks like you need it more than I do, pretty boy." I said with a smile as I pulled him by the hand towards the bar. 

------------

"I'm not a hooker by the way. Just putting that out there . . ." I said, suddenly matching Spencer's awkwardness. 

"I figured as much," he replied before taking a sip of his drink. "You're very well dressed and your jewelry is definitely real. Which could mean you're a high-end prostitute, which isn't uncommon for Vegas, but your relationship is too close for him to just be a repeat customer. So I assumed you were either a sugar baby or a trophy wife." 

"Wow. You got all that just by watching us?"

"It's kind of my job." 

"You a PI or something? What kind of job allows you to pick up on all that Mr...?" 

"Reid. And it's Dr. Reid actually. I work in the behavioral analysis unit of the FBI."

"No kidding! You? The lanky yet mysterious card counter who hasn't looked me in the eye this entire conversation, works for the FBI?"

“Yes and for the record, I wasn’t counting the cards. . .at least not this time,” he said with the slightest hint of a smirk on his lips. 

Feeling a little tipsy, I replied by saying "you know, around here that acronym FBI usually stands for Female-"

"Body Inspector, yes I'm familiar with the joke. I grew up getting my head dunked in the toilet by bullies wearing those cheap souvenir shirts from Circus Circus" 

"Ah so you're a local too?"

“Yes ma’m, Las Vegas born and raised,” he said before taking another sip of his drink. I took the opportunity to ask him another question. 

“So do you have me figured out yet, pretty boy?” 

“Well I don’t see a ring on your finger,” he said while finally looking me right in the eyes, “so that leads me to the conclusion that you are a sugar baby.” 

I could tell the effects of the alcohol were starting to creep to the surface because he wouldn’t break eye contact with me and his body began leaning towards me when he spoke instead of away. He was less guarded and almost flirtatious, in his own adorable way. 

“Ding ding ding, you got me Dr. Reid. I, uh, work as a lab assistant during the day but being his sugar baby is helping with the crushing weight of my student debt.” 

“I’m sorry that you have to spend your evenings with that jerk, (Y/N). That was mostly my motivation for accepting his offer to bet on you. I hope you know I wasn’t planning on taking advantage of you or anything, I just wanted to give you a night off from your boss.” 

My gaze softened and I tried to push away the tears that threatened to spill from the corners of my eyes. 

“That was the sweetest thing anyone’s done for me in a long time, Spencer. Thank you,” I said, gently placing a hand on his thigh. 

I saw a wave of crimson begin to appear on his cheeks and he flashed me a smile before saying, “It was my pleasure. I don’t mean to brag but I have an eidetic memory and an IQ of 187, all of this to say I’m pretty good at cards.”

“Wow! Handsome and smart? Guess you’re not the only one who hit the jackpot tonight,” I said while raising my eyebrows, “but I don’t see a ring on your finger either, Dr. Reid. You’re alone at a bar in Vegas with a pretty girl, so I’m assuming you don’t have anyone waiting for you back home?” I asked, suddenly very interested to know if this smart and adorably sweet man was single.

“So you’ve been profiling me too,” he said with a chuckle, “to answer your question, no I don’t have a wife or a girlfriend or anything like that,” he said, almost enthusiastically. Taking that as a sign, I quickly asked, 

“Would you want to come upstairs with me? I just feel so comfortable talking to you and technically you still have the rest of the night with me,” I said with pleading eyes. 

“Um . . .sure!” he said with both hesitation and excitement, which I’m assuming is because his desire is going against his better judgment as an FBI agent. 

“You agreed to that awfully fast for someone who works for the FBI.” 

“I’m not worried. I’ve been watching my drink the entire night, and I’ve been profiling you, remember?” 

At this point, we were both beaming at each other like a couple of idiots; I had to stop myself from yanking this man’s arm making a run for the elevator. 

———

"It's nice to be with a guy who doesn't have an AARP card for once." 

"Actually, it’s a common misconception that the service is limited to people 50 and over. You can apply for a membership once you turn 18," he rambled, causing me to giggle. 

"You're cute," I replied, placing a hand on the inner part of his thigh. We stayed there for a moment, our eyes fixed on one another with a blush creeping up on Spencer's cheeks. I could see his Adam's apple bob as he gulped, and I could almost swear the crotch of his pants looked tighter than before. 

"W-we don't have to do anything you know," he said, finally breaking the silence. 

"I know. . . " I said as I leaned in close, "but what if I want to?" 

I took a chance and pressed my lips to his. I let them linger there to gauge his reaction before going any further, not wanting to scare the poor man away. After a few seconds, he didn't pull away and I took the quickened pace of his breathing as a sign to kiss him more. I began slowly at first and his lips followed my lead. To my surprise, he brought his hand up to tangle his fingers in my hair and I moaned into his mouth at the contact. Our kisses quickly became hungry and passionate, and there was no denying the now obvious bulge in his pants. I moved my hand from his thigh and began rubbing him over his pants. This time, he was the one who let out a groan, the sound of which motivated me to force my tongue into his mouth. He tightened his grip on my hair, but I pulled away to tend to his growing erection. He remained seated on the edge of the bed as I dropped to my knees in front of him. 

"Y-you don't have to-" he stuttered with wide eyes. 

"Spencer, it's okay, I want to." 

He didn't protest further and I began to unbuckle his belt. I unzipped his pants and pulled down his underwear just enough to let his cock free. I wrapped my hand around the base and began to jerk him, causing him to hiss at the contact. I teased him a little by licking the tip of his dick before I placed his entire length, or as much of him as I could fit, in my mouth. 

"Oh my god” he groaned, with his eyes screwed shut. I continued to bob my head up and down his cock, his hand finding that familiar place in my hair where he began to tug again. My. pace was purposefully slow, dragging out each suck to earn a moan from Spencer. It was thrilling to be in control of the situation for once. As I sped up my motions, his hands were practically ripping the strands from my head. The wetness pooling between my legs was becoming too much to ignore, so I released my grip on Spencer's cock and used his thighs to push myself back up from my spot on the floor. 

"Spencer. . ." I whined, planting myself onto his lap, "I need you."

I took his hand and guided him to the heat between my legs. I shimmied up my dress to allow him to feel the wetness that now soaked my panties. We both let out a gasp as his fingers became slick at the touch. 

"It's been a while since anyone's made me feel like this," I admitted. I felt safe in his presence, especially since judging by his reactions, he doesn't do this very often either. 

“I-I don’t have a-," 

“Don’t worry, I’m 90% sure we’re both clean and I’m on the pill. Trust me I’m not trying to scam you for child support or anything.” 

I could feel his body relax underneath me after reassuring him. I pressed my lips to his once again, our kiss more sensual and intimate than before. Seizing the rare opportunity to be on top, I had one hand on his shoulder for support and the other on his dick to line him up with my entrance. It was almost dizzying how good it felt as I finally sank down onto his length. 

“Oh god, Spencer.” 

I buried my face into the crook of his neck, completely overwhelmed by the few of him stretching me out. Once I was comfortable, I slowly began rocking my hips. We were a mess of breathy moans and strings of profanities escaped my lips as I began bouncing on his cock. 

“Fuck Spence, you you’re so big.” 

It’s always the skinny, shy guys.

“(Y/N) you feel so good,” he grunted as he bucked his hips up in an attempt to fuck me even harder. After observing his reactions to my every move so far, I knew he wasn’t going to last long. But he was fucking me so good that I couldn’t bring myself to care. 

“Yes baby keep fucking me like that.” 

His hips continued with their relentless pace and our bodies slammed against each other again and again. It wasn’t much longer until his thrusts became sloppy and he finished inside of me with one last resounding groan. We stayed that way for a while, just grateful for the intimate connection. Once we finally caught our breath, I spoke up.

“Well you still have a few hours with me Dr. Reid, what do you propose we do?” I said with a smirk.

“We should probably go to bed, I have to catch my flight back to D.C. in the morning. . . but maybe after we do that again.” 

“I’m all yours Spencer.” 

————————————————————————

Not 100% confident about this one but lmk what y'all think :) thanks fro all the love so far besties

[theminecraftbee]

Before they'd started, this time, Scott had confidently asserted: "You know, if this time we're going to be drawing wild cards, I'll learn to count them. If it's going to be a game, may as well learn to give myself a guarantee, right?"

He'd said it like it was obvious. Easy. If he just practiced enough, he'd win every time. Skizz sometimes thinks that's how Scott thinks of the world, or maybe how Grian does, or Martyn. If he just tries this time, he'll win, a certainty that's only stopped by the fact he isn't trying the same way he might have in the past. Skizz thinks about that sometimes. He doesn't say anything, because he's not a rude asshole, but he thinks about it.

Skizz thinks about what it says about a man, to be so certain he could simply be the last one to survive if he wanted to, then to--not.

Skizz thinks about what it says about a man, to assert he's going to learn to count cards for the sake of a prize that he doesn't seem to actually want.

It's none of Skizz's business, really, and as he said, he's not a rude asshole. He's here to have a good time, or if not a good time a time, or if not that, to at least help his friends have some kind of time. He's not bothered, not really, by hearing Martyn or Scott make plans to circumvent or play into the game as to best win. He'll care if they get all stabby-backstabby but he's not teamed with them so it doesn't matter anyway. He is teamed with Grian? But Grian's way of "counting cards" never really involves that much backstabbing, just a lot of emotional avoidance, so.

Anyway, he tries to forget about it right up until Mumbo, nervously, says: "You know, maybe I should, er. Learn to count wild cards. Metaphorically, I mean. Just so that no one--"

"That's not how it works," Skizz finally says.

"Well that's a bit rude," Mumbo says.

"Sorry, sorry," Skizz says. "People just keep making references and that's not how that works! It doesn't even guarantee you win even if we were playing blackjack!"

"Really?" Mumbo asks.

"Yeah, it's like... you learn how many cards are in the deck, and you wait until the deck is mostly high cards, and you bet and stuff. Or, well, it's more complicated than that, but you don't know what cards are coming next for sure even if you do count. You just, uh, have a bit of an advantage over the house? Like, a 1-2%? And it adds up over time but you still lose. A lot."

"Oh," Mumbo says.

"I don't know," Skizz says. "I just... I know how this stuff works and it just really grinds my gears the way they talk about it sometimes. There's still a lot of random chance, you know! You can't guarantee things! It's still random! And the house could change the rules on you any moment and then counting wouldn't be worth it at all anymore!"

"Huh," Mumbo says. He's quiet for only a moment. "You know, I think we've lost track of the metaphor a bit here? I mostly meant to try to steal the cards from Grian while he wasn't looking. So we can, er, figure out the wild card before anyone else."

"Oh," Skizz says. "Well that's just cheating!"

Mumbo squints at him. "And counting cards isn't?"

"No!" Skizz says.

"Alright, if you say so," Mumbo says. "I mean, I guess our advantage is that we know that. Seems awfully silly now, the way people were talking about it before."

"Yeah, well, love the guys, love them, but I thought that anyway. Without the metaphor," Skizz says, and he thinks of the empty look in Scott's eyes as he said it. It's not that he wouldn't be an advantage player if he could be, Skizz thinks. It's not that he wouldn't try to beat the house. It's just...

Well. It's just something that isn't Skizz's problem right now, really. He just wants better than that for Mumbo. For him. For Grian too, once he comes back. There are better ways to have fun in a casino than to sit and wait for the count to be high, after all.

[sonamytrash]

Midnight

Underground Virgin!Levi x Virgin!Femreader

MDNI

Warnings: y/n used, Childhood friends to lovers, fluff, smut, puberty mentioned, masturbation mentioned, fingering, sex, mentions of abuse, mentions of rape, mentions of prostitution, characters ages aren't mentioned, but it's suggested they're both in their late teens, of age when writing but could be interpreted as underage? Virgin levi, virgin reader.

Note: Kind of wanted to write something about Levi losing his virginity and give him the blessing of something in his life that wasn't all bad. Reader and Levi have grown up together. Feelings have blossomed, and desires have been ignited over the years. The underground is a tough place to live with sex and violence everywhere. There's no smut in the first chapter, but it is heavily suggestive. Let me know what you think. Enjoy!

-----------------

In a world where the sun never shines, where the only light comes from flickering Street lights, candles, and the occasional spark from a fire, three souls found solace together in front of a fire. The underground city was a maze of dimly lit tunnels, cramped living quarters, and a constant struggle for survival. You had grown up together, survived together, and lived together in this harsh, unforgiving environment.

Your landlord was a cruel and greedy man, having come to you the with news that he wanted his rent earlier than usual, probably because he owed someone else the money or had pissed his own money up the wall. You couldn't afford to be out on the streets again. It wasn't hard to find a crook to rent a small apartment to three teenagers. But his terms were unreasonable.

Desperation and stress hung heavy in the air. You were usually the type to try and remain cheery, strong, and resilient, but these sorts of situations made you anxious. Finding money down here was hard enough, but being given less time to find it was so much more stressful. "I-I don't know what we're going to do," you stammered. "There has to be some way to make the money quickly." Furlan said thoughtfully as he tried to reassure you, but even his words sounded hollow. It really wasn't much time to get the money together.

You were always aware of the easiest way for a girl to make money down here. Selling your body to some piece of shit man to use for pleasure. It was quick and easy cash that much was true. If you were lucky enough to get paid, that is. The attempt to make any money that way came with many risks. Most women down here lived in fear of getting raped, abused, and even killed before the added risk of being a working girl. Having grown up with Levi and Furlan, they had kept you safe. Currently, you worked a part-time job at the morgue, which didn't pay well but allowed you to learn and study to some extent. But in recent years, since hitting puberty and developing into a young woman, the pressure had been more intense, men often offering plenty of money for the opportunity to have their way with you. Although this sort of interaction would result in being beaten to a pulp by Levi, he would die before he allowed you to have to resort to sex work. And you were grateful for that. The thought of having to resort to prostitution, a common but desperate measure, filled you with dread.

Levi, said nothing. He just stared at the floor, his jaw tightening with anger. You glanced at him, concerned. "Levi, if we need the money I can-" You asked softly, stopping when you saw him look up at you, his eyes burning with a fierce protectiveness. "I'm not going to let you do that," he said, his voice steady and unyielding.

You frowned. "It will guarantee us the money."

"Y/N" He said sternly. "I won't let you go out there and sell yourself for us to survive. I'll find another way. I promise." You looked into his eyes, searching for any hint of uncertainty, but found none. There was only determination.

You nod in response, feeling reassured for now by his words. "I've got to go out. I'll be back around midnight, okay?" He states. Again, this wasn't uncommon. You worried about him and where he was going but even if you asked he wouldn't have told you. Criminal and immoral are the exact words that he himself would've used to describe his work, he was probably going to go and find some quick and easy job, guaranteed to pay but always carried so many risks. Furlan smiles gently at you as he follows Levi out of the door.

Having had a bath and tidied up a little. You toss and turn in bed for hours, lost in your own thoughts. You knew Levi would keep you safe to an extent, but nothing was guaranteed down here. Even if you didn't end up in a brothel, there was nothing stopping anyone from breaking into the apartment you shared now while the boys were gone, you could he kidnapped, raped and murdered any night, or day for that matter. You shudder at the thought. You wanted as much of your life to be in your own hands and control as possible. It wasn't like you wanted to stay a virgin forever, while still being young, you were old by the standards of the underground, which made you laugh. You wanted your first time to be something you choose, not something taken from you. You had desires and thoughts late at night like this when you were alone. Always of your stoic companion. You weren't sure when your feelings towards him became romantic, but it frightened you. He was difficult to read, but you were sure that there could be something there. And if there wasn't? Well, you were sure you could convince yourself that you would be satisfied to just be by his side in whatever capacity the universe will allow. Maybe you would be fortunate enough to be born as a princess in the next life, and he would be your Prince charming. You roll your eyes and laugh at the thought. A girl could dream, and your fantasy of prince's, pretty dresses and castles, however impossible it was did help you to fall asleep for a few hours before you were abruptly awoken by the sound of Levi and Furlan returning. You could recognise the sound of Furlans footsteps retiring to his small room at the end of the corridor. It sounded like Levi was still in the living room. You sit up in bed and light a candle.

Levi walks over to your door, having noticed the light emitting from beneath. A heavy sigh escapes him, his eyes carrying a look of exhaustion. As he knocks on your door just once, his voice is soft.

"Can I come in?"

You respond with a sleepy yes, and Levi pauses for a moment before he comes into the room. His eyes shift to your bed, and he realizes that you're only wearing a tank top and underwear. He doesn't let his eyes roam over you for more than a second, trying to focus on something else in the room before speaking up, sounding worried:

"Are you alright? Why aren't you sleeping?"

You smile. "I was, and I wasn't, I fell asleep not long ago, but I heard you come home. Is everything okay?" You ask him concerned.

Levi nods as he sits down on the edge of your bed.

"Yeah, everything is fine. Sorry if I woke you up. You should get back to sleep." He smiles softly, something only you and you alone are ever lucky enough to see. You gently tug his arm. "Stay, just for a little longer." A blush creeping across your cheeks. This was a bold move for you. Maybe you were still slightly delirious from having just woken up.

Levi looks down at your hand as it lays on his arm. A slight blush creeps up on his cheeks as he looks up at you again. Your messy hair, dreary eyes, and smile are just too cute. He doesn't know what he would do without you. He hates that he can't find a way to get you all out of this cesspit. You're like the moon that continues to shine on the darkest night. He's already resided himself to do anything to keep you safe and by his side. He feels guilty that this sight of you is making his cock twitch. The years have been kind to you and you're such a beautiful young woman now, each and every night his hand is tightly gripped around his cock at the thought of you. Seeing you like this, the covers barely covering your panties and your nipples visible through your tank top is all the more fuel for his desires. But he knows how it is for girls down here, he saw what life was like for his mother, he sees it daily in the streets. He would never dream of treating you with anything but the respect you deserve. Not only that, but the thought of jeopardising the relationship that you have now should he tell you how he feels, loosing you would really plummet his life into eternal darkness.

He reaches out and gently tucks a strand of hair behind your ear. "I guess I can stay for a little bit." He says softly. "Since you're such a brat if you don't get your own way." He teases.

You pout playfully at him, he chuckles as he shifts a bit closer to you, now sitting next to you with his arm around your shoulder, you nestle into his chest. A slight blush appears on his cheeks, which he immediately hides by turning his face away from you. "You're not still worrying about the money, are you? Is that why you're acting so needy?." He asks quietly

You shake your head. "Not anymore, I know it won't come to that." He nods, relieved that it isn't worrying you any longer. He's pulled from his thoughts when you speak up again. "I'm grateful. I know what I want for myself. And it's thanks to you that I'm able to make my own choices." You lift your head to meet his gaze, your face painted with a furious blush. "I'm ready to make my own choices."

Levi chuckles. "Well, you're spoilt for choice if that's the case." He says, trying to ignore the pang of jealously he can feel in the pit of his stomach.

You shake your head  "That's not what I mean, Vi." You nervously bring your palm to his cheek. "I want to be with someone I trust, someone I love."

Levi stares at you. Blushing slightly at your words. You have grown into a young woman who's a lot braver than he gives you credit for. A small smile forms on his face, but he's still hesitant to say all the things he wants to.

Levi tries to keep his usual cool exterior "A-Are...Are you saying what I think you're saying right now?"

You nod nervously. Averting your gaze, you have said enough for someone as intuitive as Levi to piece together. The seconds seem to last forever, but he finally gives you his response with a soft and gentle tone:

"I... I want that, too."

[antimatterz]

Help I had an idea

What if with a self aware blade that their yn wants to pull for him but ended up losing pity instead of getting blade and they are too sad because they want to get blade

losing the 50/50 on his banner

blade x gn!reader

summary: you warp for blade but lose the 50/50.

cw. self-aware au, slightly possessive blade

content under the cut | masterlist

your heart was pounding as your gaze rested on the number of stellar jades you owned. you've saved up a lot for his release, but was it enough? your next five-star wasn't guaranteed to be the one promoted, or, in other words, you had to win the 50/50 in order to get him. that simple fact made you nervous.

     "to be honest, i'm terrified," you admitted.

     "aww, you want me to join your team that badly?" blade teased lightly. (but in fact, he wanted to come home to you just as badly, he just doesn't admit it).

     "you know how much i want you," you sighed, and blade smirked.

     "do you realize how that sounds?" he asked, amused.

     "shut up," you laughed, your hand hovering over the button that would allow you to do your first ten-pull on blade's banner. "should i warp? i'm losing my shit here."

     "go on," blade encouraged you, leaning back with a grin still on his face. "wait for gold, and i'll be with you."

     "you don't know," you corrected him. "i have to beat the 50/50 first."

the male fell silent, because he knew you were right. nothing he would say or do would affect that matter. it all came down to sheer luck.

well, procrastinating wouldn't magically increase your luck, maybe you just had to get it over with. you glanced at blade one last time, as if that would actually manifest him, and then you hit the warp button. your heart was hammering anxiously – bladie was right, you badly wanted him. you would be absolutely devastated if you were to lose the 50/50. you watched the warp animation (bad luck if you skipped, right?) and you heaved out a breath you didn't realize you were holding when the door flashed a bright purple. no five-star in your first ten-pull. disinterested already, you skimmed through the results and went on to the next pull. once more, it turned purple, and you sighed in disappointment.

you watched your stellar jade count go down rapidly, which wasn't doing good in soothing your anxiety. you didn't have a lot left, but if your calculations were corrent, you were to hit pity soon.

meanwhile, blade was getting impatient and so were you. while you only got a little antsy, the stellaron hunter got quite grumpy as your warps went by unsuccesfully.

     "i think i'm almost there," you said, your voice a few octaves higher than it usually was. that was how nervous you were. terrified, actually, now that you were getting closer.

     "it better be me," blade hissed, folding his arms.

     "it better be you," you agreed with a curt nod.

finally, freaking finally, the door flashed a vivid gold. your heart leapt in your chest, as you closed your eyes and heaved out a heavy sigh. surely, you weren't ready for this, but you had to get through with it. your hands were shaking as you skimmed through the result, and you sucked in a sharp breath when five golden stars sprung onto your screen. this was it!

but it wasn't blade.

your heart sank as you gazed at the standard five-star that appeared on your screen. that wasn't your beloved stellaron hunter. you lost the 50/50. you cursed, though your voice held no anger but only sadness instead. it was enough to let blade know what happened, and he growled.

     "who is it," he seethed, cracking his knuckles. "i'm gonna–"

     "it's okay," you said softly, more to convince yourself than to soothe the angered stellaron hunter. "it's fine, i actually needed this character, too."

but it wasn't fine. you were upset, to say the least, and you were only trying to cope by lying to yourself. you wanted blade so badly, but instead you got someone else. truth was, you didn't even want them, that was merely a lie to make it seem a little less bad. it wasn't blade, so you were not interested in them at all.

     "y/n, listen," blade spoke up, his voice trembling with anger. "i don't care who came home instead, they aren't important. remember you still have a few weeks before my banner ends. i will come home, i promise."

he gazed at you intensely, pressing his hand to his side of the screen. you understood his intention, pressing the palm of your hand to the screen of your device as well. it was as if you were sealing a promise here, and between the threads of sadness that lingered through your being, you found the will to grind like a madman in order to get bladie still.

     "you're right, you will come home," you nodded, forcing a smile.

you retreated your hand, closing the warp screen because you had a mission to embark on. and you wouldn't quit before your beloved stellaron hunter was home with you, where he belonged.

[llamagoddessofficial]

Well Llama, you’ve got me hooked on another one of your aus. That post about kids visiting the harpy aviary reminded me of my own field trips as a kid. I…may have gotten a reputation for wandering off and getting lost. NEVER on purpose, mind you, it just always seemed to happen! I can guarantee I would have found my way into Skull’s enclosure. With that in mind, what WOULD our loveable teddy bird do if a kid somehow wandered in?

I'll do you one better. Here's how all of them would respond to a child wandering into their enclosure.

Sans: Usually, when anyone who isn't Mc approaches the grouchy harpy while he's sleeping, he gets extra vicious at his sleep being interrupted and lashes out. Many staff who got too close/confident have the laceration scars to prove his favouritism toward Mc. Let sleeping dogs lie, as they say.

... But even though anyone watching can clearly see his sockets open a fraction at the approach of the child, he does absolutely nothing, continuing to lounge around like they aren't even there. The kid literally wanders up to him, touching his soft plumage, and he does little more than snore. He's like a lion dad with a fussy cub- they could cuddle up next to him, shout and scream, jump on him, pull his feathers, anything. He might even play with them a bit... pretending to roll over in his sleep and pinning them under a wing. Oh no, gravity is increasing on me...

He likes kids. He doesn't consider a child any kind of threat, unlike adults. This one is particularly funny. He also very much enjoys the attention Mc gives him for being so gentle.

Red: Kids find him cool so it makes sense one would eventually find a way to wander in. He used to not really care about children, but after he started courting a human woman, he's grown very fond of human kids. It's one of the reasons he seems so delighted when groups of them come to visit the aviary.

... But obviously, this kid isn't his biologically. So there's a worry he won't tolerate them in his space. Not the case, though! If Sans is the lazy lion dad, Red is the grumpy one. If a kid entered his enclosure and started following him around, he resembles a slightly annoyed older brother with their delighted younger sibling shadowing him absolutely everywhere, but he still lets them do whatever they want. He lets them clamber on him, tug his feathers, touch his cool teeth and claws. Despite his constant annoyed expression, when staff come to the rescue he's got the kid on his shoulders where they gleefully prod his face and talk about flying.

He's quick to let out little warning growls if they get too rough. But that's it.

Skull: A kid who walked into Skull's aviary would have to be suitably unafraid of him. Which is his dream. He immediately scoops them up, and they play together for as long as possible, climbing and 'flying' and exploring. It's the best time he's had in a long time.

Unfortunately... then comes the removal process. Mc tries to do it slowly, tries to gradually convince Skull to let the kid go so he doesn't lash out. And she almost gets it- she can see in his eyelight that he's close to handing them over. But not close enough... the other staff panic and tranquillise him.

... Skull goes to sleep holding his baby. And he wakes up no baby. Mc stayed with him until he woke to try and mitigate the inevitable fallout, but her presence does little to calm him. His distress is obvious, he tears up his enclosure looking for them... and once he realises they're gone, he becomes completely inconsolable, curling up in the corner of his den. You don't have to be a harpy expert to know that the sounds he's making are ones of grief.

For at least a week, he's utterly despondent. He won't eat unless Mc is there, he just stays in his den, cradling his plushie. He always keeps it tucked under one wing... like he's hiding it.

(He's scared he'll lose that, too.)

[goodnightmemes]

THE FALL OF THE HOUSE OF USHER SENTENCE STARTERS (part two / ep5-8)

❛ Your life will take a complete change of course. Tonight. ❜

❛ Women are the natural leaders of the species. Ancient Egypt had it right. ❜

❛ I know we haven't always seen eye-to-eye, but we have to pull together now, don't we? ❜

❛ Okay, just because the door's open doesn't necessarily guarantee you a seat at the table. ❜

❛ You're not who I thought you were. ❜

❛ I really didn't want to think it, but...you're all fucking monsters. ❜

❛ Watching you shit on your principles would have been worth every fucking penny. ❜

❛ Why, if it weren't for you, they would all still be alive today. ❜

❛ The mind of guilt is full of scorpions. And I wouldn't wish their sting on anyone. ❜

❛ I don't need nor want to humiliate you, you're doing fine on your own. ❜

❛ Smart girls are only sexy until they don't wanna fuck you, and then they're competition, and then what do you do? You take them down a peg. ❜

❛ Don't have to be smart to be dangerous. I'm not scared of rattlesnakes 'cause they're so smart. ❜

❛ I assume I'm authorized to negotiate on your behalf with this individual? Unless you object right now, I assume I'm authorized to approach these negotiations from a hostile posture. ❜

❛ You're so out of touch with your human side...you can't even listen to anything outside your own head. ❜

❛ You've got to be smart. You have to realize, you can't trust people. Not you. Not anyone. ❜

❛ I haven't seen you sleep in like...I mean, it's been a fucking long time. Like, horror movie long. ❜

❛ You are losing it, honey. ❜

❛ Or maybe I know what's actually happening here. Crazy as it sounds. If all this crazy bullshit is right, then maybe I know how to stop it. ❜

❛ Well, she's... she's quite dead. Isn't she? ❜

❛ Life is insane. It is madness. The sooner you understand that, the better off you'll be. ❜

❛ The world might not be safe but listen to me, and listen carefully. I won't let anything happen to you. ❜

❛ All these terrible things and I thought, that's when people come together. But we've never been further apart. ❜

❛ I expect he's the kind of man you call if you, I don't know, accidentally kill a prostitute and need to dismember the corpse. ❜

❛ I like to think he killed someone. I like to think he's eaten human flesh. I like to think he took a piss on the tip-top of the world. ❜

❛ Tell me it's worth it. Tell me you know the risk and I'll be there with you. I'll back you up. Just tell me. ❜

❛ Shut your mouth, get your shit together. The fuck is wrong with you? ❜

❛ Men, when they think they're immortal, all they want to do is fuck. When they figure out they're going to die, all they want to do is fuck. ❜

❛ It just makes you think, you know, life is so fucking short. ❜

❛ You don't have to be a tyrant, but if you don't want to be consistently cruel, then you have to be sufficiently brutal at least once to establish authority. ❜

❛ Why the fuck would you do that? I'm sorry. Why the fuck would you do that, sweetheart? ❜

❛ You smell like shit and you look like shit, and you're acting weird. ❜

❛ If anybody spoke to me like this, there would be repercussions! You do not get a free pass! ❜

❛ I'm afraid you're ringside for my reckoning, old friend. ❜

❛ I thought it was an act. I figured you just played the housewife so you could keep a roof over your head. Spread your legs or suck his dick twice a week and you're set. You never have to work a day in your life. And I thought, "Good for her, she found her angle," but...this is really you. Isn't it? ❜

❛ I thought you only existed in the movies. ❜

❛ Words got us into this, words can get us out. ❜

❛ You're a collection of impeccable, elaborate masks in orbit of a stunted heart. ❜

❛ There are certain things one shouldn't have to face in life. Time enough for self-reflection after. ❜

❛ You're a monster, you know that? ❜

❛ I don't normally like to get my hands this dirty, but honey, you earned it. ❜

❛ You only ever wanted to be loved by him. You only ever wanted his approval. And it's still no fucking excuse. ❜

❛ I see you now. I look at you and I see... You. The poverty of you. ❜

❛ I don't know you. The man I know, the man that I love could never… But you're not him. Are you? ❜

❛ But I didn't know! Did I? I didn't know who I was dealing with. ❜

❛ That candle will last you an hour or so, then, I'm afraid, you're in the dark. ❜

❛ I find most people have a threshold qualifier. Something or someone they'd be unwilling to sacrifice, no matter how sweet the deal. ❜

❛ The real world is Darwinian. Survival, chaos, power. Leverage. ❜

❛ You feel it. In the air. We're sitting outside of time and space. ❜

❛ This is the moment luck meets opportunity. ❜

❛ In the ancient world, we'd seal this with blood, or spit. And then later, papyrus. But, a deal's a deal all over the world. ❜

❛ We're a... virus, I think. People, I mean. ❜

❛ But everyone loves something. And in that love there's collateral. ❜

❛ I have no collateral. Collateral is leverage. And I won't be leveraged. ❜

❛ I say this with love. Let it go. Let it all go. ❜

❛ There is a lot about my job I love. But there are moments like these that bring me no joy. ❜

❛ So I say, we stand tall and proud. Bill's come due. Let's not hide here in the basement like we've got something to be ashamed of. No. Not us. You and me against the world. ❜

❛ It may not have been perfect, but you can't say we didn't change the world. How many people can say that at the end? ❜

❛ I knew I would climb to the top of the tower on a pile of corpses. ❜

❛ It don't matter in the end why you did any of it. I don't fucking care why you did it. We don't want your confession, or your rationale, or your explanation. ❜

[jojoma]

Some time ago I wrote out points why I ship Astarion with Karlach (them remains my favorite and headcanonical ship in the entire game). But I understand how conflicting and possibly traumatic the relationship is. I wanted to write a lil bit about this. But it'll be a long post 😁

The game is currently bugged in such a way that the couple doesn't have a happy end (in my opinion, cuz Karlach return to Avernus only with AA), but there is an absolutely sad ending (when spawn Astarion runs away from the sun and Karlach die alone). I, like many other hellspawn enjoyers (snezhjeyka, decembersiris), thought about how much it would be better if they died together on the pier. At least it's better than what is happening in the spawn Astarion playthrough by now (described above). They both are deprived of a normal life, both refuse to live without what is valuable to them (Faerûn, sun) and without each other, and both turn to dust. It's very poetic, tragic and etc. But I'm more interested in angst before this.

I mean only the player knows all the variations of events. For example, that Karlach can be fixed or that Karlach cannot be turned into a vampire. The relationship has no prospects from their points of view, and the options that they have cannot completely satisfy both.

Karlach dies quite quickly. She can die in her beloved world or try to survive in the hells. And we all know what Karlach think about it — she would rather die now and here. But as soon as Karlach start relationship with someone, it becomes also her lover’s problem. It would be strange if her partner accepted that Karlach would die so soon without even trying to convince her. Now put Astarion into this place: he is just beginning to heal and feel alive. Even before he defeat Cazador, loving relationship with a patient and gentle partner (such as Karlach) can influence him in a good way. So Astarion is afraid to lose his lover and Karlach is afraid to return to Zariel’s place.

On the other hand, Astarion needs to decide what he'll do with the ritual and soon enough. And unlike Karlach, he doesn't know what to do. In my opinion, if Astarion could make the choice on his own, based on background he would be choose ascension. The decisive factor in the other direction can only be his love interest. My strong headcanon is this: as Astarion will not agree with her early death, as Karlach will never agree to become his spawn (10 years of slavery to Zariel was enough for my babygirl). And any of other companions or Tav/Durge as Astarion's lover can offer to stay with him, help him full recover and adapt to a new life (anyway spawn Astarion will be alone in the future). Karlach doesn't have such opportunity at the moment, and her condition lead into the hell with no guarantee of survival or return to Faerûn. It requires some sacrifices from Astarion, which due to his condition, he may not be ready for.

I can imagine such dialogues before bedtime, turning into heated disputes:

— I'm worried about your condition, Karlach. — I don't want to talk about it. — There's other options. I think you should return to Avernus with me. — Well, and I think you shouldn't get involved to the ascension ritual. I know you want to take Cazador's place. — It's not up to you to decide. This way I can protect you and may even save you by turning you into a vampire. — I'll never become yours or anyone else's spawn, thank you!

I need to stop making myself sad 😢 They deserve a very very happy end.

[rimeiii]

What in Hell is Bad Demon Kings as Arknights Operators

(If you saw this before, it's because my Tumblr app glitched out and sent the draft before I was done orz)

So, funny story!

With every single WHB demon king already obtaining a playable version, I found myself thinking of the very hypothetical scenario of Asmodeus facing off against Mlynar, an AK Operator who also doesn't do normal attacks (he'd lose imo, our local jaded horse uncle salaryman Mlynar is OP for a reason yo). But this turned into thinking about every single demon lord in the context of them as AK Operators...

I also kinda need to appease the gacha gods by providing any sort of content, because Logos's banner drops on the 31st of October (which is tomorrow oh my god) and even though I may already have a spark ready for him (300 pulls) and enough materials to max him out day 1, I want as many copies as possible for the AK equivalent of his tea leaves.

I could've had more but I spent like 240 pulls in the past 6 months to grab several other 6* Operators, notably a guaranteed new Operator on the celebration banner (Penance in ~60), ~50 in Zuo Le's banner (got him), another 10 on Ascalon's banner (didn't get her), and a whopping 120 on Ela's banner (R6S collab, collab banners have hard pity at 120 pulls).

Update for those who care - yeah, it worked! 160 pulls for my first copy, immediately ran to fully upgrade him before pulling again, and got another two within the next 140. Welcome home husband ❤

Some ground rules before we get into the meat of the post, however:

I'll be using the Selfie cards as main inspiration, pulling in lore for any other adjustments.

Will also be putting down some skill info! Skills will assume 6* standards, meaning they have a total of three skills to choose from and two passive skills in total (Talents).

I won't be doing Modules, skill names, and skill numbers, to preserve my sanity.

Without further ado...

Satan

Satan's Selfie card has an insanely long range and strong single-target damage, but his skill deals AoE damage. That's why I think he could be a Deadeye Sniper. This, despite him apparently sharing the same seiyuu as Totter, a Besieger Sniper.

Deadeye Snipers have high Attack, a large range (extends in a triangular shape forward), and prioritizes attacking enemies with the lowest Defense. As a matter of fact, they have among the highest Attack in the entire game! This is why I picked the Deadeye Sniper subclass over Besieger Sniper for Satan - even though Besieger Snipers also have a long range, they have a blind spot in the row right in front of them, have lower attack than Deadeye Snipers, and prioritize attacking enemies with the highest weight.

First skill: a generic Attack buff.

Second skill: summons his blood scythe to attack everything in his range, dealing AoE Physical damage and inflicting Fragile (increases damage taken by all affected enemies) for a brief period of time. He can store up to 3 charges of this skill starting Mastery level 1 (normally he can only store 2 charges max), but its cooldown is slightly longer than Leonhardt's second skill, which has a similar effect.

Skill 3: an ammo skill that turns his regular attacks into AoE attacks. Increases his attack wind-up time, gives him a sizeable Attack buff, and inflicts Fragile on all affected enemies for a brief period of time. Because it's an ammo skill, this skill will continue until either he runs out of ammo or the player manually deactivates this skill.

Talent 1: increases damage dealt if there is only one enemy in his attack range.

Talent 2: all of his attacks ignore a set amount of enemy defense, this amount increases after being deployed for a set period of time until a certain cap is reached.

Mammon

Quite possibly the only tank in the entire lineup of demon kings while still being able to deal some damage, which is why I think he could feasibly be an Arts Protector Defender. Bonus points for him also sharing the same voice actor as Czerny, an Arts Protector Defender!

Arts Protector Defenders deal Arts damage when you use their skills, and they tend to be on the more offensive side while still boasting respectable defenses and blocking ability. The other offense-focused Defender subclass, Duelist Defenders, may have higher attack, but they're only able to block one enemy at a time, unlike the 3-block of other Defender subclasses.

Skill 1: a generic attack buff.

Skill 2: an attack speed buff and minor attack buff, coupled with the ability to attack all blocked enemies and lifesteal (heals a small percentage of damage dealt).

Skill 3: increases his range to attack the 8 tiles around him and summons his golden fists to attack an enemy at a time, dealing AoE damage where the target is and providing a small percentage chance to briefly stun all affected enemies while slowing down their movement speed for a brief period of time.

Talent 1: increases his max HP and defense.

Talent 2: upon skill use, grants him a shield based on a percentage of his max HP, this shield will decay over time.

Leviathan

Now, Leviathan shares the same voice actor as Shalem, another Arts Protector Defender. But Leviathan wouldn't be a Defender, I feel. Instead, I'd like to lean into his 'summoner of Eldritch beings' side a little bit more and have him be a Summoner Supporter.

Summoner Supporters deal Arts damage and are able to deploy their own summons, each with their own behaviors and stats. The summons' passive effects and behavior depends on the Summoner's set skill. Leviathan's summons would all have 1-block by default. These summons would be his Eldritch beings, but I'd like to think he'd have a particular focus on his tentacle monsters. A little bit like Deepcolor, a Summoner Supporter whose summons are tentacles, with her being of the fish race (Aegirs).

Skill 1: summons can be deployed on melee tiles and deals single-target physical damage. When Leviathan uses his skill, he and his summons gain a generic attack speed buff.

Skill 2: summons can be deployed on ranged tiles and deals single-target Arts damage. When Leviathan uses his skill, he and his summons gain Invisibility (prevents them from being targeted by all attacks until they are revealed, either by invisibility-revealing enemy skills or being blocked) and a significant attack buff, but slightly increases their attack wind-up time.

Skill 3: summons can be deployed on melee tiles and deals single-target physical damage. When Leviathan uses his skill, he and his summons gain both an attack speed and attack buff. His summons also gain +1 block count and attacks all blocked enemies.

Talent 1: Leviathan can have up to 5 summons at a time (can only deploy 3). These summons have different stats and skills based on Leviathan's equipped skill.

Talent 2: Leviathan and his summons have a minor HP regen by default, based on a percentage of their attack.

Beelzebub

I considered Instructor Guards for Beelzebub because of their tendency to have whip or whip-like weapons (some notable exceptions being Swire with a mace and Rainbow Six Siege's collaboration Operator Doc with a gun). But Instructor Guards are typically more support-oriented, which I feel kinda goes against Beelzebub's general personality, so...I decided on making him a Lord Guard.

Lord Guards have a larger range than even Instructor Guards and boast the ability to launch ranged attacks within their extended range, but these ranged attacks have lower attack power compared to their regular attacks. They deal single-target physical damage.

Skill 1: a generic attack buff.

Skill 2: drops light arrows at several spots within his attack range, prioritizing those closest to him. These arrows deal a single instance of AoE physical damage and inflicts all enemies hit with a damage over time debuff. Normally 2 spots are selected, increased to 3 spots at Mastery level 1.

Skill 3: changes his damage type to Arts, increases his range, allows him to target an additional two enemies with each attack, and gives himself an attack buff. Enemies hit by his attack suffers a damage over time debuff for a short period of time.

Talent 1: gains increased attack when no allies are in his immediate vicinity (the 8 tiles surrounding him).

Talent 2: his attacks have a small percentage chance to 'crit' and deal increased damage, this percentage chance increases as long as he hasn't dealt a crit damage instance, resetting after each crit.

Lucifer

I feel like this is the most no-brainer choice. In Arknights, there is only one subclass of Medics that have the ability to damage enemies, which is the Incantation Medic. Medics in Arknights typically don't do any damage apart from these Incantation Medics and two Single-Target Medic exceptions in Kal'tsit (has the Mon3tr summon, a DPS unit which is what she's mostly used for) and Folinic (only deals damage on her second skill).

Incantation Medics are unable to directly heal their allies, unlike all other Medics. Instead, they attack enemies that enter their range with single-target Arts damage, and subsequently heal an ally within their attack range with the lowest amount of HP based on the total damage they dealt onto the enemy.

Skill 1: increases attack speed and heal amount per attack.

Skill 2: heals everyone in his range after each attack, and gains an attack buff.

Skill 3: increases his attack and attack speed, attacks deal some splash damage on surrounding enemies. When no healing is needed, damage dealt is instead converted to a shield buff on a friendly unit, prioritizing an ally in his range currently being targeted by an enemy. Otherwise, default to the last-deployed Operator.

Talent 1: gains increased attack speed when an ally within his range has his HP dropped below half.

Talent 2: his attacks have a chance to lower enemy attack and attack speed by a certain amount.

Belphegor

The fact that he deals AoE damage with his normal attacks makes it a pretty cut-and-dry choice between two different classes, in my opinion - those two classes being Artilleryman Snipers and Splash Casters. I personally am biased towards Splash Casters, purely because Belphegor doesn't seem to be wielding any guns, which are typical for Artillerymen Snipers.

Splash Casters have high attack and deal AoE Arts damage with every attack in their range. They also have a slower attacking speed compared to most of the other classes to balance out their high base offenses.

Skill 1: a generic attack buff.

Skill 2: slightly increases his attack and attack speed, extends his range, and inflicts Slow (lowers movement speed) for a period of time on all enemies hit by his attacks.

Skill 3: increases his attack and attack wind-up time. Now attacks all enemies in his range, has a small percentage chance to Bind (causes the enemy to stop moving and attacking) the enemy for a brief period of time, and the effect of his second Talent will be increased.

Talent 1: stores up power the longer he goes without landing an attack on an enemy, up to a certain cap. This bonus resets every time he hits an enemy. Think Platinum's passive.

Talent 2: all his attacks ignore a specific amount of enemy resistance (reduces Arts damage by a percentage based on its number).

Asmodeus

Another one where I had to debate between two different classes that do not perform normal attacks - none of them being related to Flagbearer Vanguards, the class with the character that shares the same voice actor as Asmodeus, Elysium (even though Flagbearer Vanguards typically stop attacking normally when their skill is active). The first class is the Liberator Guards, who are far more offensive in nature (notably, this is the subclass Mlynar belongs in). The second class is the Phalanx Casters, who are much more defensive in nature. After some deliberation, I decided to go with Phalanx Casters for Asmodeus.

Phalanx Casters normally do not attack, but have greatly increased defensive stats while their skill isn't active. While their skill is active, however, they'll deal Arts damage to all enemies in their range and lose their boost to defensive stats.

Also, an important note for Asmodeus specifically. I will NOT be limiting how many times Asmodeus can use his skill, because most of the 'limited use' skills in Arknights are due to lore reasons (Guard Amiya S2 being capped at a single use in each stage as an imperfect copy of Guard Ch'en's S3, a good chunk of the Rainbow Six Siege collaboration Operators' skills having a per-deployment limit because of Rainbow Six Siege's mechanics).

Skill 1: retains a portion of his increased defense, gains an attack buff.

Skill 2: gains Invisibility, a sizeable HP regen, and both an attack and attack speed buff. Can manually deactivate this skill, reverting back to his state before using the skill.

Skill 3: increases his range and attack. Attacks will 'mark' the hit enemy and have a percentage chance to inflict Fear (enemies will scatter around and cannot be blocked). When his skill ends, every enemy marked is hit with a strong Arts damage instance. Can manually deactivate this skill, ending it instantly and reverting his state change to one before using his skill.

Talent 1: has an innate Sanctuary (cuts damage taken by a certain percentage amount), which increases the more HP he loses (up to a cap at 80% HP lost).

Talent 2: after being deployed for a period of time, gains Taunt (becomes a target priority for enemies). Reflects a portion of damage taken back at the enemy based on a percentage of his attack as Arts damage.

[garrettwrites]

Warning: discussions of homophobia; extremely negative rant over a popular lgbt book.

Post context: I waited a decade to read a certain retelling book that focuses on the development of an lgbt couple, one which has been discussed over the centuries. I'm doing my best to censor its title and characters, so this post doesn't show up in the tags for people who genuinely love this story. The title, one I now view as overrated, is something along the lines of a song about a certain popular greek hero with long blond hair and a particularly fragile heel. I wanted to read the original, the Iliad, first. I was so excited... and finally, I read the Iliad and other classical texts, I studied ancient history, and I was finally in the mood to start, paired with good knowledge of the characters that would feature in it AND the historical context... Only to find out I shouldn't have waited. 14/15 year old me would have loved this. Current me cannot. I find most reviewers must have either been high while reading, or have taken this book as teenagers, because there is no way an adult over the age of 25 with some degree of reading experience would have not seen the glaring problems with this book.

Disclaimer, if you care - I have no problem with story alterations. I can be critical of them, sure. But even that won't stop me from enjoying something. I think Percy Jackson should have followed a more greek setup, and I don't particularly fancy some of the worldbuilding choices, but those books were and still are among my favourite fantasy stories. Even though they're for children. Even though I've read Tolkien. I'm no elitist, nor do I believe shit can't be changed to make a compelling story. What I do have a problem with is how you present information, and how you distort it.

For instance, if you wanted to write a story about Ariadne and her godly husband set in the year of 1850 for some reason, and make opium play a role? I think that's a fucking weird setting. But it could work, if you stuck true to what characterises them, their relationship, and had a story with a beggining middle and end that tries to show something.

Going back to the retelling that inspired this "rant review". I'll let others more qualified than me to talk about the sexism. What shocked me here was the gay lovestory that reads so homophobic in how cliché it is that it hurts.

This story reads as "when you're so progressive you gotta turn a gay couple made up of two masculine, warrior like, war drowned men into "the hot warrior and his healer who hates fighting" so it fits into (the already sexist/misogynistic) heterosexual couple role".

Because god forbid you have a gay couple where you actually need to deconstruct masculinity without villainizing it. God forbid you actually need to write men into a gay story. God forbid these men are not good, and you need to get into their complexity. God forbid the pov character, who is written as a love struck maiden, has a life outside his strong warrior that helps contextualise his love for him.

Listen. Feminine men are amazing. Gay feminine men are too. I have plenty of original characters that fit within these labels. What I do not do is turn two ancient greek warriors into an early 2000s seme uke yaoi dynamic where one of them is a fragile maiden war tent housewife and the other a very hot but detached strong soldier god man. This is not the story to do that. And even if you play with gender roles and have a man take a more "womanly" role, it's not enough to just genderswap - a character is still badly written regardless of wether they're male or female.

If the housewife character here was a woman, I guarantee everyone who praises this book would be losing their marbles. A woman with no personality outside her lover? Afraid of fighting, of standing up, of speaking up, and this never changes? Who becomes a healer not because she studies it, but because her fragile soul has no other option? Who is passive as all hell in the story until the author remembers she has to die in an impactful manner to trigger her male love interest? That is two dimensional and no way to write a girl, and it's not suddenly okay just because this girl has a dick and is a him.

Yet cause it's gay it's okay to write such an insipid character. Praised even. Which is made even worse, because the original version was a man who yes - indeed - was kind to others yet an absolute beast on the battlefield. Who had opinions and gave counsel. This is not even an original character - I wouldn't criticise an original character as harshly, but this author changed a fighter with incredible skill, who killed a son of a god and was a hero in his own right, into this. A character who yes, was kind and beloved. But touched by war regardless. A character who was loved by those around him, but in this book is ridiculed by these very same people.

Why do you think that is.

And no, trying to make the story more anti war is not an answer. The Iliad is anti war. The Iliad literally comments on how war corrupts what it touches, how it fucked up the lives of everyone involved. This is not a modern take on an old story, because the old story in question already talks about it.

But what can I expect, here. I could call this a work that doesn't know how to write gay men without adhering to (already dated even for straight people) gender roles... but truth is? Author doesn't know how to write women either. The moment you unironically think Helen of Troy is just a vain little hot chick you should not be allowed to write an Iliad retelling, me thinks.

Oh, and let's not get into the fact both main characters are meant to be gay. They're not bisexual. Yet this book - a GAY ROMANCE - is not shy about shoving straight sex scenes onto you. Sex scenes with really no purpose, for they're never brought up again later, and have no story impact.

I am not kidding. Character A gets D pregnant, Character P barely reacts to it, and when D gets upset at P for whatever reason THE TWO OF THEM HAVE SEX TOO. NOTHING AS GAY AS FUCKING THE WOMAN IMPREGNATED BY YOUR BOYFRIEND, UH?! And it's never brought up again! Nobody forces Character P into this yet he willingly goes? Excuse me, if you wanted these characters to have sex with women so casually, why not just make them bisexual and open to banging outside their relationship?

It reads as so disgusting, to have an author clearly lean into a soulmate trope, then just pull some of the most uncomfortable to read sex scenes ever outside that soulmate couple (I love purple prose. Purple prose is probably the only reason I didn't hate this book - the writing was beautiful. But the way the sex with Character D goes... good lord it's written in such a puke inducing way). I'm not against poly in books, what I am against is leaning into monogamous tropes for a gay couple, where you write neither of them as bisexual (which, btw, bi-erasure of the original characters) but then have them bang outside their relationship EVEN when nobody is forcing them to. Never have I read a gay book where straight sex is pushed forward so much. And it's not just even weird for the gay couple, it's also written in a really odd way for the women involved.

"Oh you just don't get the theme! It was out of pity! It was-" turn this into a straight romance and tell me, with a straight face, that this story is well written. Bad character development, bad usage of tropes, terrible pacing, and the use of sex outside the main romance purely for reader self insertion (for it contributes with nothing but shoddy erotica, in a book supposedly about AxP) should not be excused just because a book is gay.

Honestly. "Let people enjoy things" well I propose let me be a hater. I went above and beyond to block the book and character names, let's hope it's enough. But I'm against not criticising things just because they're diverse. It's 2024. There's plenty of authors writing good stories with marginalised people.

And let's talk about LGBT+ worldbuilding, shall we? In the beggining of this book - set in Ancient Greece by the way - it's stated men could take male lovers on the side. Then it's not brought up again, until later a woman tells P many married men take lovers on the side. This girl was originally a sex slave by the way, and here she gets Stockholm Syndrome and falls for P. But then another character tells P he's too old to be into men? So, which is it? It's not even a thing about ancient greek men having that thing where it was accepted for an older man to be sexually involved with a young boy, because here the problem brought up is P being too old, not his lover being too old too.

Oh, and the love interest's (A's) mother. She hates their relationship. We are told she hates their relationship because P is mortal and she doesn't want a mortal to be with her son. Yet later on she arranges a marriage between her son and a MORTAL woman. So is the problem really mortality, or homosexuality?

Why is there modern day homophobia in a story that many praise for historical accuracy?

I honestly hate how people care about representation at the cost of quality. It is mind boggling to me that a woman in this century wrote a book more homophobic and misogynistic than greeks almost 3 thousand years ago did.

[quentin-didnt-die-in-the-books]

I don't think it was an awful decision to kill off Quentin Coldwater

Okay so I know how my url looks but now that I've spent a bit more time on this site and seen how other people feel about this, I think I should clarify my meaning.

Let me start out by saying Quentin was my favorite character both at first, when I watched the show, and after, when I read the books. He's the one I related to the most and just a character I enjoyed watching. His death was a shock and I stopped watching the show for a while after. But having read the books and gotten some distance from the incident, I don't hate the decision to kill him in the show. This is partly because he doesn't die in the books so if I want, I can just choose to only consider that ending as the real one.

But more importantly, a main point of the story that the books tell is that no matter what awful things happen in your life, you need to find things that matter and ways to move on and still be happy. Since the books are from Quentin's point of view, we mostly see his struggles and successes when it comes to finding reasons to live. But the show intentionally showcases the other characters much more than the books did and there are plenty of storylines that Quentin isn't even a part of. It is harder, in certain ways, to build empathy for characters through a tv show because it's not from their point of view and we, as audience members, can often have different interpretations of something we watch. So rather than being able to live through Quentin, we are almost a part of the story ourselves and we have to make our own way and come to a conclusion ourselves, rather than being led there by a narrator. In this way, Quentin's death is something that we have to get past and find a way to move on from in the story. I'll admit season five isn't my favorite season but it does have some of my favorite scenes in the show. It doesn't just throw us back into a fun fantasy world with silly humor and adventures. There is a grieving process and it takes a while for the show to become at all lighthearted again. After reaching Quentin's death and losing all interest in the show for a bit, it is significant to me that I ended up missing the world that it created enough to go back to it even knowing that my favorite character would not be a part of it. I'm not trying to compare this to losing someone you love in the real world because I don't think that is an accurate comparison at all but it is comparable, in my mind, to losing something that had sentimental value or missing out on an opportunity you can't get back. Realizing that something hasn't turned out the way you wanted it to and being able to move on and still enjoy other things again is very important and I think the show did manage to capture the spirit of the books even if that might not have been the writers' exact intention. I think some media is about escapism and creating a world where things are better but I don't think that is a requirement or a guarantee.

I also just want to mention that I understand the fine line between media as an art form and media as representation of the real world but I think this show does an excellent job of giving the audience a meaningful story even if it isn't necessarily "fair" to the characters. Obviously, media can perpetuate discrimination in the way it treats certain identities and communities (e.g. discrimination on the basis of gender, race, sexuality, disability, mental health) that are already discriminated against in society. I think in this instance though, there is also a case to be made for seeing the characters, especially Quentin, as a way to cope with the awful things that happen in the world, rather than just an expression of those awful things. I think The Magicians does do a good enough job of developing complex characters that they are not simply caricatures meant to represent entire groups in society for the purpose of making broad claims about those groups.

Obviously, I wanted Queliot to happen but I really don't think this show was trying to be homophobic given the many other examples of queer relationships in the show. I do think we still have a ways to go in how mental health issues are portrayed and treated in media but I think Quentin's death, and the whole show, itself, is about much more than that.

[sailorblossoms-snowbaz]

In romances that have action elements, "the love interest of the action hero/protagonist is used to hurt him" (because that's how you target "his heart") is typically a thing...

What’s interesting here is that Agatha was constantly kidnapped as part of playing this role (she was likely constantly kidnapped because she's by far the easier mark; this is also part of the design of the damsel role)... while Simon takes danger very seriously, at some point this becomes practically routine for Penny and him (Penny talks about rescuing Agatha as early as 2nd year, so they likely arrived at this point pretty early on). This is something they do so many times that they sort of don't take it seriously anymore. Not seriously enough, at least. The total confidence that they will save the day is, after all, rooted in "experience" – I mean, why fear for the girl when you have saved her a bazillion times before? When she's always "fine at the end," even if she's pissed?

As much as she was kidnapped, it's never once "Agatha is targeted to hurt me" – it doesn't hurt Simon at all. He never even expresses any worry about it (I'm getting back here). I mean, think about it: Agatha is thinking "I'm always saying that living like this is going to get us all killed but nobody listens to me" when just a little while back Simon was like "I don't need help to rescue Agatha, I've done this hundreds of times before," in the middle of losing his entire goddamn mind for Baz-related reasons, as Simon often does (likely how it played out for years in Watford in a nutshell). Agatha being targeted only truly hurts Agatha... her very serious and valid grievances are met with dismissively confident grins and "don't worry, I'll always save you" as opposed to "how can we prevent this from happening again?” Nobody ever cares to address how she doesn't want to be a target in the first place.

So it really picks my attention how differently Simon behaves when the target is Baz. It doesn't mean Simon doesn't give a shit about Agatha – she's loved like a friend, like someone he grew up with, like one of the very few people in the world who are close to him. She notes that Simon enters the battle looking like he won't leave her behind. But when she's in danger, she's playing a role (even if it's against her will) which gives Simon security (even when it causes the opposite in her).

Agatha being targeted is treated more like part of a job, and in a way, that's what it is. It's Simon's "job" as a hero to protect. During his time in Watford, it's what makes him feel useful. According to the script they're following, the hero always saves the girl... So it makes sense for Simon to never worry about Agatha: worrying contemplates a scenario in which he fails to save her (only Penny and Baz worry, and it comes with the awareness that she could be dead). That's something Simon simply can't do. It's the sort of thinking that goes against the script, which he actively avoids to survive. It would threaten everything that gives him worth and purpose and security; again, heroes always save the girl! He has always saved her before. Anything else is unthinkable.

When Baz doesn't show up, that goes against all roles and scripts they have been following all along... and if you do look at the script, disrupting rival/antagonistic roles tend to go down a path that ends in their destruction. So of course Simon would lose his mind with worry, even if he focuses on "he must be plotting" scenarios. Of course Simon goes restless whenever Baz is out of his sight, even if he doesn't fully get why. After all, Simon's "job" isn't to protect Baz according to their roles, but to fight him. The structure that makes him feel like Agatha's safety is guaranteed at the end would also make him fear that Baz is the opposite.

Ultimately, "the protagonist's love is used to hurt him" is applicable, but not in the way it's usually done (fucking with the female character to further a man's story). Agatha has a voice. It does nothing for Simon's development when she's targeted – on the contrary: his character is stuck in a routine. It highlights her hurt and his flaws. (Perhaps it even creates a contrast, a "before and after Baz," a "Simon who follows a script vs a Simon who finds himself" that shows how Simon struggles with certain thoughtfulness and caring before he's learning by following Baz's cues. He was a neglected child and so he doesn't know how.)

We see this applied when Baz is targeted, and Simon notes, upset, that "Baz was used to hurt him." He has never before made that kind of observation. Baz is a man, and a rival, and a vampire (a "monstrous villain") who's expected to be hurt, but this is no longer follows the script. This follows nothing, so the stakes feel more "real." If Simon doesn't know where Baz is, he grows restless. If there's even the possibility of Baz being in danger or hurt, Simon loses it. This is not about a job, there isn't a (false) sense of security backed up by roles and the precedent set by them. Simon shows us again how much the roles didn't fit Agatha and him toward the end, when the mage is ready to attack Baz, but Simon grabs the mage's wand and redirects it toward his own heart. Baz is his heart. It was never the damsel. You hurt Simon the most when you hurt Baz.

[simvanie]

7 Sins Legacy - generation 4 (pride)

Supriya: So, Did you talk with... your father about his proposition he made last Friday? You seemed a little hesitant during the conversation.

Rohan: There were some things I wanted cleared up, but it's all good now.

Supriya: What did you want cleared up?

Rohan: He let me know that he was thinking about retiring a while ago. I had almost forgotten about it so I was a bit taken aback when he said that he is actually planning on doing now. But I get his point that he preferably wants to do it before the city's elections-

-speaking about the elections, I made this rather redundant pie chart and wrote down ways we can secure votes and their chance of succeeding.

Rohan seemed to quickly change the topic of the conversation as Supriya was processing the fact that Rohan didn't give a proper answer to her question. She then looked at the chart as she read the ways to secure votes. "Debate politics from our standpoint, promote policies, and... make empty promises?!"

Rohan: Well, yous see, you've earned the career reward to make empty promises two promotions ago, so it's an option.

Supriya: No. We're not going to make promises we can't keep and lose trust from our voters.

Rohan: Listen, I can guarantee you that no politician in history, whether that be a congressman, senator, or even president, has ever kept all their promises. It won't harm the party as long as we make sure that we keep and fulfill our main promises, don't you think?

Supriya: ...

...let's say connections. ...put everything in place to ensure a smooth transition before the next elections...

Rohan: Supriya?

Supriya: Suraj wants you to lead the party when he retires, doesn't he? Now I understand what you meant with connections when I asked you about the cause you protested for. You didn't have to work your way up, everything is already laid out for you!

Rohan: Hey, I've worked just as hard as you to get to the point where I am now. The reason I didn't have to protest was because he wanted me to work by his side when I started so I could experience what it means to be a politician first hand. You've no idea how much work I had to do- why do you seem so affected by it anyway?

Supriya: Don't you see? An equal opportunity for someone in our party to work their way up and even have a chance of getting that position is completely taken away. On top of that, it'll probably take years before another opportunity like this occurs. He just wants us to work together so I can help you to look your best for the public-

Rohan: What? No! Why would you think that? You're amazing at what you do. It's partially because of your work why we are doing so well in the polls right now. You can make it so far in this career. I just had no idea that you wanted a shot at it too, although you have to realise that your current position is not high enough yet to be even considered as head of the party.

Supriya: I know I can do it! I've been working so hard since I started here. I don't want to be stuck on a position if I know that there could have been a possibility for me to achieve more. I just... wouldn't feel good about myself- about working here... I'll stay to secure the votes for the party because I told him that I would, but I'll probably try to look for a job where there is AT LEAST A POSSIBILITY to reach the top of the career somewhere else after.

Rohan: Oh- wow, hold on, there is no need to take such radical decisions right now- I know that you love this job, don't you want to think about it? Just promise me that you will think about it before making any rash decisions.

Supriya: ...Fine. I will.

[13eyond13]

a friend of mine who isn't into Death Note asked me why people ship Lawlight. I gave her a pretty good answer but I feel that couldn't encapsulate it fully and you are the most articulate/analyzer person I can think of here, can you help me?

omg, I'm flattered you think that, but a bit worried I won't be able to speak for everybody about this! I'll probably just have to mostly say why I like to ship it and hopefully that will suffice...

1) the constant tension and the mind games between them is the heart and soul of the series to me. Light's a complicated character that is both very entertaining to follow and also sort of an infuriating bastard to watch as well, so when L waltzes in being like "HOLD ON A MINUTE HERE I KNOW IT'S YOU AND I'M DEFINITELY GONNA PROVE IT" and Light both seems to get extremely excited about how clever he is and also horrified and determined not to lose, that makes for a very charged dynamic that keeps you on the edge of your seat. Light's curiously positive reactions to L opposing him, as well as the way L intuitively understands him and pushes his buttons so effectively, is definitely one of the funniest and most intriguing things to watch in the entire show.

2) there's a lot going on in the narrative to continuously draw parallels between them and to sort of suggest that they're the true equal and peer that the other one has never actually had their entire lives, the solution to the boredom and loneliness and aloof superiority they've both been feeling due to their above-average intelligence and privileged positions and ambitious competitive stubborn streaks and so on. People love that and also find it super tragic/angsty or fascinatingly ironic and darkly funny that they end up only meeting in an enemies, "you're the closest thing to a real friend I've ever had but one or the other of us will have to die" sort of way

3) This part of their relationship also gets me as well - they probably would not have easily met if Light HADN'T been Kira, because L never has to meet any of the people he works alongside nor any of the criminals he catches in person - Light was just good enough at being a criminal to force L to meet him in person, basically. And there's also no guarantee that if they DID meet in other circumstances that they would have clicked so weirdly well as they do, because their cat and mouse game was probably the best way they could both impress each other the most and prove their own intelligence and entertainingness to each other as well. The immense difficulty of setting up this ship so that it actually works is part of the enduring appeal to me.

4) I think there's just a lot of intrigue to how much is left unsaid between them the entire time. They literally never get to have an actual straightforward heart-to-heart even once in the story, but they're seen obsessively thinking about each other the entire time (and Light continues to do so for years after L's death, even to the point of comparing everyone else who opposes him to L unfavorably after his death and admitting he feels bored again now that L is gone). I think a lot of fans were kind of dying to see them interact in a more straight-forward way

5) the handcuffs are certainly fairly suggestive and kinky hahaha... and the memory loss arc definitely brings up a lot of interesting "what if" type scenarios in every shipper's mind. Not everybody is convinced that they really hate each other, and seeing them work together on the case like that causes a lot of people to think about how they might get along if Light had never picked up the notebook in the first place. The fandom has a lot of people who really like the idea of them together whenever Light isn't Kira, and also a lot of people who think their dynamic is superior and works better when Light IS Kira - and having both of these different dynamics between them presented to us in canon makes for even more interesting possibilities to explore

[spotsupstuff]

hi

you've mentioned that sparrows would have reincarnated as a slugcat?

would you mind elaborating on that?

also would they have met caper again after becoming all scuggy?

heehee

hoohoo hee :)c of course i'll elaborate! it is Her ✨ Fish's little best animal friend

wonderfully enough, Sparrows and the Tinkerer were developed completely removed from each other in my head, so Tinkerer still feels like a rather separate character from Sparrows even though they somehow wound up havin a lot of similiarities. exactly how the reincarnation stuff should feel like

the Tinkerer is Sparrows! and no character in-universe will ever find out. it isn't important. nobody but Tinkerer is affected by this, and Tinktink doesn't really have the means to speak about it. but for us behind the screens that know about this it will make Tinktink's interactions with the world just a lil bit more juicy

you've sent this at a good time, too! the day ur question came in i was actually pondering how to somehow make use of this reincarnation fact and not just let it float about as a lil bonus for the people that would know about this lil tiny ultimately unimportant connection

so, the idea: as we (probably) all know, Euros is going to end up developing the Rot. this is distressing for a large amount of reasons, but the main point rn is that Euros is also a secret archive of folklore of the lower circles in the Eo group, plus maybe even a little bit over the range's borders to the east (after all, there's two more groups right next door to him n he's a phone operator chief). Euros is going to die a slow painful death and he won't be able to care for or save his collection of knowledge, which somehow manages to hurt him more than the reality of his impending doom

maybe not so surprising, considering that in his archive are the stories, the history, the spirit of his late lover's home- a place he clung to for as long as he could, the one he spent the most time in with his overseers, the one that held people he constantly wished could be his citizens instead of the vile and fake *things* soiling the streets of Ales

so one day after the Fish has properly reconnected to the Eo group, is caught up on current events and trying his *damnest* to revive Mission Self-preservation even though it is guaranteed to be useless, Euros mentions the nightmare that he's living through

"I'm a dead man walking, carrying precious treasures of people that were never heard crying out. I've held them close and safely within myself for over two thousand years. And now, when I'm fated to rot through and splatter on the ground, I fear all this time will be for nought. That I will kill what I've been protecting for so long."

"Even if nobody ever reads these- learns of them, hears them out from above their graves- I can't bear the thought of losing them."

and well Fish DOES have a lot of beef with Euros, but at this point this bitterness is starting to give away to desperation and horror of the terrible torment waiting for them in the future. he might be stubbornly still trying with the Mission, but he would go against what makes him himself if he didn't acknowledge that they are all damned for good no matter what he tries. so he gives in to the pity and hails Tinkerer to his chamber

he explains to her what he needs her to do and tells Euros about the plan. Tinktink has to travel all of this distance

to get to Euros (basically walk through the whole Europe), but dammit, she helped one Iterator that became her closest friend, she will help another one (a different Gen 2 that she loved and dedicated her whole life to in a different life)

Fish sends her on her way with a hug and a plead to keep herself safe

it takes her over a month to get there even with the help of vehicles like the barely working trains and a remshackle sky-sail that Fish guided her through fixing in their free time together. when she gets on top of Euros' structure, the dejavus start to hit. she visits the Mechanics' home, her feet carrying her to the bedroom as if it was just another end of the workshift. she looks in the cupboards she- opened millions of times- never even touched. she walks outside and then down the path to the entrance into the Iterator she's- taken countless times- never set a foot on

she saw these halls so many times she can pin point where every screw is- she's never been here, she can't understand these giant beings, they are too complex for her animal brain. that specific rhythm of beeps and pumps and water rushing through metal veins has haunted- comforted- her in many of her dreams. the Tinkerer makes it to the chamber almost like on an auto-pilot

when she enters the chamber, the slugcat finds itself disappointed, scared, confused- this isn't what this place is supposed to look like (but how does she know what it is supposed to look like-?), this isn't how she left it (this is the first time she stands here, what are these thoughts). it's supposed to be brighter. warmer. why is the puppet's plating and skin damaged by time, where is it its vibrancy, why are its eyes so tired? there are panels missing from the walls ("it's got to be the results of that Fever i once made a proj- i can fix thi-! what?"), glowing artificial bronze robins fly about or sleeping on his shoulders, tiny Rot cysts pulsate from the cracks in the umbilical arm. where has the firebird in that halo gone off to?

Euros greets her joyfully ("oh what are you trying to play at, you goof. i've known you for so long, i can tell when something's wrong. what's hurting? why are you tired? i'll get you back into shape, doncha worry love.")

"Ah, you made it! Welcome to my chamber, adroit little thing."

"Please. Your journey was a long one. I hold no doubt a very dangerous one, too. I won't march you into the job immediately. Rest up."

Tinkerer thinks he's strange. but her legs are indeed hurting, the bag strapped to her is heavy. she curls up in the corner of the room and tries to get some shut eye. she almost falls asleep when Euros starts mumbling under his breath, shooting nervous glances towards the birds. five fingered hands tremble so badly the joints rattle like a child's toy. he's scary, when his shoulders hunch up like that and those tired eyes turn frantic. but it hurts so much to see him like that for some reason, more so than it is scary. so against the better judgement of a survivor, she softly coos at him

the puppet's head snaps to her, gaze cold. the mumbles increase in volume, allowing her to understand

"...I'll tell you what. I have another mission for you, little messenger. But it has to stay a secret between the two of us. Nobody would approve, especially not the one you belong to now."

something whispers that the puppet closing in is supposed to be a comfort. the larger part of the Tinkerer instead finds itself wishing to run away

"Are you aware of the Memory Crypts that lie beneath all of us City Bearers?"

cautious nod, back pressed against the wall

"Good."

[los-ninos-tortugas]

Let's talk about the Familial Bonds AU

So I'm currently at home and looking over all the pages of writing and AU's I've made so far, literally don't know how not to be nervous posting about my own AU's but I think part of it was that I wrote this down a while ago. But! Let's do this anyway.

I started writing this post a full year ago. My grasp on long stretches of time is... slippery at best but goddamn. Evidently I wasn't as close to shaking off my anxiety back then as I thought. Which to be fair is still true now. But I've been sick and miserable this past week as well as incredibly bored and I've been thinking about this AU a lot again lately and I've been trying to find a way to ease myself out of my post college graduation burnout and finally posting this seems like a good way to get the ball rolling. So enough about me, let's finally talk about this AU.

So, going from my notes that I wrote a while ago; You're Family Because I Found You, I Found You Because You're Family (I really had a penchant for long and dramatic titles when I first started writing for Rise). Short name: Familial Bonds AU

AU Summary: Stories in this series fall under the head canon that Casey Jones is Cassandra and Leonardo's biological son. So far there are two(?) stories planned for this series.

Something Unspoken: Despite their close relationship and some obvious signs that Casey was in fact Master Leonardo's son, it was never something they acknowledged. Casey spent his first seven years with his mom, moving around constantly to various resistance bases. In those years Casey only ever saw Leo in passing and hadn't yet made the connection himself-- in spite of having some turtle-y features of his own. Casey came under Leonardo's wing at eight years old after his mom died fighting the krang. Living and learning from Leo allows Casey to figure out their connection pretty quickly, but the fact that Leo himself never seems to bring it up* stops Casey from wanting to bring it up himself. Casey is a bit too young to understand or figure out why Leo never seems to want to talk about it so as the years go on they seem to develop this unspoken understanding that it's just something they don't talk about (even though Leo acts as Casey's father in all but name).

Now that Casey is living in the past with a sixteen-year-old version of his dad he has some very complicated feelings about this whole mess and decides he's just gonna ignore the problem and hope it goes away. (Hint hint, it does not.) But of course, it's not exactly super easy to hide all of his more mutant turtle features so he treads very very carefully to make sure none of them realize he's more closely related to the Hamato's than they initially thought. However this becomes harder and harder as a new branch of the Foot clan** starts creeping into New York's criminal underground, and it becomes clear that they also have a vested interest in the key, which the Hamato's are still struggling to figure out a way to destroy.

From here on my notes actually get pretty spoilery so I'll just keep all that to myself for now and go over some other little details.

*A big thing that I actually ended up getting stuck on (and probably one of the reasons I delayed this for so long) was Leonardo's motivation for not talking to Casey about how they're related. For a while I wondered if it was out of character or unnecessarily cruel for Leo to treat him only as a student and eventually I came upon the conclusion that if nothing else, Leo is his father's son and being emotionally stunted is practically genetic in this family. So his reasons I think are more misguided than anything and still come from a place of caring, if still ultimately rooted in fear. I think being in that place of war and loss and seeing the pain that Casey went through at losing his mother I think Leo might have thought to himself "I can't put this kid through that again." In the bad timeline who lived and who died was never guaranteed, and Leo knew he wasn't excluded from that, so I can see his logic as something along the lines of not wanting to give Casey false hope only to then break his heart again. I don't think he necessarily anticipated living to see the end of the war, or that he and Casey would grow closer anyway. And ultimately Leo is wrong anyway, and he can't spare Casey from the pain, and losing Master Leonardo hurts just as much.

**I like to imagine that the Foot Clan has had a few splinter groups form over the years. I mean, they're a few centuries old it's hard to imagine that some people didn't split off. I like to imagine that the group that eventually made it's way to New York that we see in the show is probably the oldest existing sect, hence why they're still deeply into the world of the mystic as well as savvy enough to build a shell company to finance their endeavors. This new group that's coming in is one that I think dropped out of the mystic world a while ago, and didn't really believe in it. They're more strictly focused on just committing actual crime. But with the New York Foot Clan basically wiped out, and with the invasion changing people's worldview a bit, they seize upon the opportunity they see presented to them. Their interest in the key and in post-invasion New York comes from an interest in the krang technology and weaponry. They're not particularly interested in the krang themselves and they're honestly a little smarter than their predecessors so they don't exactly want to open the floodgates again, but they do still want to study the properties of the key and krang tech for nefarious purposes so it unfortunately falls on the weary Hamato's to stop them (poor kids can't catch a break).

There are a couple of other subplots that unfold in this fic (I've thought about this a lot) but again, in the interest of not getting too too spoilery for now, I think I'll hold those details back for a bit. Let's get into the second story I have planned for this.

The More Things Change: Buckle up gang this is the "Leo loses his arm" fic. After getting ambushed by the new Foot Clan Leo is critically injured and the gang has no choice but to bundle him off to an actual hospital in the Hidden City. As they're all sat in the waiting room Casey starts to wonder if certain things are just inevitable as he thinks back to when Master Leonardo lost his arm. Present Leo is understandably pretty distressed about this new development considering he just got out of recovery for his injuries from the invasion and is of course now wondering how he'll move forward from this and if they'll still be able to execute their plan for getting rid of the Key. Perhaps a little unsurprisingly I don't have a lot of notes for this fic yet because it is a sequel to a fic that hasn't been written yet, but the details will get fleshed out as time goes on and I do have a lot of thoughts about it.

My notes for this AU overall are a bit incomplete, which I'm kinda fine with since I wrote them a long long time ago now and revisiting them now actually gives me a chance to really think about filling in a lot of blanks that didn't come up in my initial ideation process. Like you might notice that for an AU about Casey Jones being both Leo and Cassandra's son that for some reason Cassandra seems to be oddly missing from a lot of the plot?? I'm not sure why I initially forgot to include her for about 90% of this but now I can think of a way to actually put her in and do justice to her character rather than just being Dead Mom(tm) because she's so much cooler than that. And I've also been working on fleshing out everyone else's roles in this story because since I've initially thought of it I've come up with a lot more layers and subplots that fit into this universe that I really want to explore.

That's it for now, thanks for reading <3