#but i have been here lurking
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And even then I'm not going anywhere until the very last second, possibly only by being dragged off kicking and screaming. I've been on here too long to go quietly. Or with any dignity.
every fucking year we get another "no seriously tumblr is dying for REAL this time" scare and at this point i'm just taking an exhausted drag of a cigarette and staring out the window knowing damn well you are not even going to get me looking at another social media platform until either every last one of my beloved mutuals jumps ship to the same alternative or i log on here one day and there are actually red flashing lights all over my dash and an alarm blaring and a robotic voice telling me This Site Will Self Destruct In 24 Hours
#this is legit the longest ive been on any social media#i had a myspace back in the day for all of a week before i abandoned it#i spent about 6 years on livejournal#a couple years on fb before jumping ship and deleting my account#never bothered with twitter or instagram#but ive been on tumblr for something like 14 or 15 years even if i havent actively posted for all of that#but i have been here lurking#tumblr is the only place ive felt comfortable and able to control what i see on my dash since lj#i do miss lj sometimes#it definitely wasnt the same as tumblr but i liked it there...until it died#i hope i dont have to find another social media because as far as i can tell tumblr is the last bastion of anonymous social media#and thats part of why i stuck around#that and being able to curate my dash and actually have things show up in chronological order#i cant stand the whole algorithm “best/most relevant posts first” thing other social media forces on users#i pick what and who i want to see not the algorithm!#also im such an unhinged feral little gremlin now from being on tumblr so long that i dont think i could integrate on any other social medi#it would be like releasing a feral creature into a busy mall or something#possibly amusing for bystanders or outsiders#horrifying for the patrons and staff#and stressful for the feral creature who would probably end up scurrying around haphazardly and scratching and or biting several people#before finding a safe dark hole possibly made by destroying walls in order to hide and using whatever it can find to build a nest#after which it lives on whatever food court leftovers it can scrounge up and haunts the mall terrifying staff and patrons alike#until it becomes part of local legend#a cryptid that teenagers use to scare each other and college students use in hazing rituals#and uh...that up there is a good indication of why i will not thrive on other social media#but im leaving it because its funny to me
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Empress and her Bodyguard.
(OCs, grey haired lady Zaphira she/her, demon Shargon he/they)
(also some details up close)
and this guy bc i find him funny
#ganondoodles#art#digital art#painting#artists on tumblr#ocs#original character#look i had to call it quits at some point#so if i waited anylonger to post it in whatever form of finished it was i would have lost interest and would never have posted it so#here it is#also you guys get more info#zaphira is the empress of the largest land in this world and conquered most of it in her youth#she used to be obsessed with war bc she wanted to prove herself to be the strongest ruler there was after the violent death of her-#adopted parents#she grew to see that that isnt the way in part bc of her lover at that time who was a general in her army#but she died in that battle and since then zaphira has been trying to rebuild whatever she destroyed and give back what she can#but she is still very hated and couldnt leave her palace for the longest time bc of assassins until she heard of a demon lurking around#and sought him out to be her bodyguard bc who would dare attack her when shes got a demon at her side#this is her arriving at the palace of another country whos leader challegned her to a fist fight bc he thought shes frail and old#(its an assassination attempt- she knows that)
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Thank you all for an incredible 500 days of love and support. I offer you: answers to questions that no one has asked.
(As always, more can be found in the tags <3)
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#a-qing#jin ling#wen ning#jiang cheng#“Hey wait this feels like there should have been way more content for questions” Yes. There was.#I was not strong enough to redraw *all* of what was lost. Rest in piece the original (lost to tea related accident)#But I'll tell you all the fun other things that would have been drawn out right here in the tags!#Did you know my longest posting streak was 61 days? And my longest hiatus was 6 days?#Did you know I missed posting on 92 days of those 500 days - meaning I posted 82% of the time on a daily basis?#I'm normal about collecting data. I have so much data on this blog for normal reasons. I'm also so normal about art. The normalest.#Honorable mention for the character rankings: Lan Wangji! for “Most improved in rank”.#Sorry Lan Wangji fans but until the audio drama I honestly was...pretty indifferent towards him.#I think a huge part of that was due to the fact he's constantly paired up with WWX; who has *so* much charisma and steals the scene#But I've really come to like him a lot more since starting this project. He rose from mid-tier to being in the top ten!#Dishonorable mention: Nie Huaisang. Who fell out of number 1 spot and out of the top 5.#He just hasn't shown up a lot! And my rankings are fickle! They will probably change once I finish the third season!#My favourite comics are: A lot of them! And the ones I have yet to make!#I'm very sleepy at the moment while writing this but I do want to give a huge shout out to YOU.#Yeah! you reading this! Thank you! If you've been here since the first week or just started reading: THANK YOU!#If you've only ever lurked and never even liked a single post but still read my comics: THANK YOU!!#In creating this blog - I have found 500 days of more happiness that I could have ever imagined.#Thank you for joining me on this journey. Thank you for giving me your time and your support.#It means more than any 'thank you' could say B'*)
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THAT'S HOLMES RIGHT??? IN HIS BOOKSELLER DISGUISE ON THE LEFT???? THAT'S THEM WALKING IN TOGETHER SIDE BY SIDE RIGHT?!!?!? JESUS CHRIST?????
#JOHN WATSON YOU DONT EVEN KNOW#fuck shit ouagh fuck#i cant believe i never noticed#but i figured holmes must have been lurking about#AND HERE HE WAS#I LOVE THIS SHOW#oh god fuckin shit HE'S RIGHT THERE WITH HIM#sherlock holmes#john watson#granada holmes#the empty house
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THE GOLDFINCH (2019)
More than anything I was relieved that in my unfamiliar babbling-and-wanting-to-talk state I'd stopped myself from blurting the thing I'd never said, even though it was something we both knew well enough without me saying out loud to him in the street - which was, of course, I love you.
#the goldfinch#oakes fegley#theo decker#finn wolfhard#boris pavlikovsky#boreo#mine:gif#mine#usergif#mlmsource#oh hey hi people of Tumblr. i've been away for a while (hiding in plain sight actually... i was here lurking but i wanted to feel invisible#for a while)#here is a silly gifset i made recently <3#have a wonderful day everyone reading this 🩷💕#queue
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Eldritch Nika!!! I’ve always been fascinated with this idea ever since reading those fics where Nika is a separate entity (that may or may not have a an agenda of his own) and slowly influences Luffy to being a facsimile of himself. The You are my Sunshine and At the Gallows… are my favorites of Luffy being… slightly off and uncanny due to Gear 5/Devil Fruit. And all those “Gear 5 at Marineford” fics where everyone is horrified at the reality bending he does (Time Moves Through You being my favorite) are fantastic and big inspiration.
#please read all of these they are fantastic#all of the Luffy is Nika fics are incredible and I have been lurking in those tags on ao3 they are so good#Time Moves Through You is a big favorite and totally not because the time travel trope is my favorite no sir no nepotism here hahaha#one piece#sun god nika#monkey d. luffy#eldritch#opart#op luffy#straw hat luffy#art#digital drawing#digital art#fanart
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guys i really think they’re just getting revenge on their fans rn. like all those years of SLOWLY inching towards a hard launch and now they’re millimeters away from it and it’s gonna stay like this for AWHILE. they WANT us to seem absolute batshit crazy to the rest of the world and they love it.
imagine their fans talking to normal people “oh have dan & phil said if they’re together or not yet?” “well no not really but here’s this 20 page long list of everything they’ve said/done recently that is basically saying they’re together” “….oh …. Haha….Ok then….”
#maybe this is just a me thing#i have so many fucking theories i need to discuss with someone PLEASE. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE#I’ve just been lurking and sending in anon msgs to the big famous ppl on here bc like . i need to Join on this conversation So Badly
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hello, my fellow karamatsu comrades.
⛔ BLMATSU / PROSHIPPERS DNI!! ⛔
#i was trying to figure out a happy medium between my style of ososan's style for casual doodling on here... i'm still working w/ it#the other sketches are older and in my regular style tho#i haven't drawn these guys in years so i'm trying to get back into the swing of things#for any ososan girlies if you have seen someone w/ the user wildflowercryptid in your notifications dats me hi 👋#i've mostly been lurking but i wanna try making more ososan stuff bc the blogs i follow really inspire me...#i also have an oc i've been working on so i'll post about them soon :)#osomatsu san#karamatsu matsuno#karamatsu#todomatsu matsuno#todomatsu#mj draws#osmt
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The Problem of Witches
"What is true power" is supposed to be one of those deep, philosophical questions with no real answer. It—and the thought experiments which grow on it like clinging weeds—are meant to become a mirror to the speaker's biases, to reveal how they think about the world. Let that be so.
To my mind, the answer is simple: true power is control of the context in which the world is understood. It is the ability to say "this is what the world is", and be heard.
It is intoxicating, and dangerous, and many-layered.
Seen through the fantastical lenses of works like This Is How You Lose The Time War and The Book of the War it is conflicting frameworks of the Commandant and the Garden or the Great Houses' anchoring of the thread (the creation of history with themselves at the center). It is the pinions which Exordia's Khai place in their subjects' souls, narrative prisons that make the Khai's success inevitable; it's Elden Ring's outer gods struggling for control of what the world will become.
In the real world it's the narratives which bind our comprehension of what the world could be, and what it is; and it's the processes which led to their current state. It's all of the choices that constrain the space of what's possible.
Perhaps this is an unsatisfying answer. Perhaps it is trite. Perhaps I'm just vaguely waving my hands and going "society's the real power, man! It's everything around us!" So be it.
In my own stories, there is magic: the ability to change parts of the world. Sometimes this is fundamentally altering part of the world (sunlight is a honey-thick liquid, that drips and stains and smells of sweet rot); more often it's changing the way something works (as long as you remember to chant these words once a day, your body will become soft and plump) or what part of the setting is like (things around the graveyard doll get spooky and sepulchral).
That's not an exhaustive list, by the way.
And then, there are witches, and the problems they create.
By the time a witchling becomes a small-witch, their existence has already begun to distort the world. Rules stop applying, or get more complex, or more conditional. There are loopholes.
Put too many small-witches in close proximity, and weird stuff happens. Things skew and break; points of disagreement or conflict gather narrative weight. There is always potential for escalation.
And then there are true witches. "A skin worn by a fragment of the Unreal", I said. "The hollow left behind by a hidden heart. Someday a sparrow will wear down the mountains which stand beyond the world and they will watch, uncaring." And then, lest I be misread, "their presence leaks into the world, corrupts narratives, stains souls. They become undeniable. Some call this a curse."
By their mere existence, they shape the world.
I've been grappling with the consequences of that ever since I started writing about them.
Because—think about it. What does that do to a world? What happens?
My forever-unfinished map of the City of Corrade shows that city as a series of thin bubbles, with buildings and forests and suns clinging to their pastel surfaces. Setting cast as a series of moods, as layers, as abstract bubbles of influence; a city seen through the lens of subway trains, connected-yet-disconnected. In many respects this is a concession to my writing; landmarks recur, and moods, but everything around them (and their relationships to each other) shift as easily as a dream's psychogeography.
That, then, is what happens to the people and places within a true witch's influence. They exist within her context, within her understanding of what the world is. In Corrade, capitalism only exists in the city's Downtown, whose striving spires cling tight to the Astral Witch's midnight observatory; the waves of gentrification and decay which lap at the city's client suburbs flow from the blended presence of several lesser true witches. Crossroads Station, HER orbital citadel, a relic of a long-ended war still ringed watchful angels, exists only because of the power slowly leaching from HER still-warm corpse.
And at their feet the lesser creatures squabble and struggle and try to thrive. Some become witches; most do not.
I grew up across the bay from San Francisco, all those years ago, and perhaps that tells you something of why I understand geography in terms of the great powers that affect it, of the titans whose movements shake the world and the fungal outgrowths of the lesser powers which serve their whims. Today I regard them as pathetic, all those child-kings clawing at the edges, desperate for more, for the glory of their unfinished apotheosis, for a final escape from reality's laws and constraints—but that's part of my witches, too. Abusers are fundamentally pathetic; powers grow so tangled in the context they create that they can never break free. They choke and die on their own success, still unsatisfied, still wanting more.
That hunger is all they are.
#worldbuilding#witchposting#essays#I have been very careful not to talk about capitalist realism here#or about marvel movies and the scope of possible narratives#but I'm sure you can see those shadows lurking just outside
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the yapper
#honeycloves art#cccc#chonnys charming chaos compendium#chonny jash#cj heart#cccc heart#colorshift!heart#i'm still here. lurking. breathing on all of you#i just havent been drawing and thus have little to post
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hello sharks lb i know we like crafts here so have my deco'd toploader of our kibble and macklund at the bakery i went to today
#sharks lb#i have been lurking for a while but have been afraid to post LOL so here i go#i have more but i? never took photos of them? so ill post those later
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i don't have the words to talk much about the ep yet, but i wanna say thank you to everyone who's been watching along and hyping it every week on here 🥹🥹 literally anyone and everyone here on the tag, i've had so much fun yelling about saintshin and co together <33 really gonna miss hsf mondays and tuesdays 🥹🥹🥹
I AM HUGGING YOU ALL <33
#there's not many people watching here so it feels like a little family 🥹🥹#ty to all the new moots i've gained and just anyone who's been posting or lurking <33 i love u all 🫶🫶🫶#it's 2 am i have a flight to catch in 5 hours but i'm here sobbing over a show 😭😭#high school frenemy#lam.text
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7x09 is titled "Unfinished Business" ....
Tell me that is not a revenge plot against Bobby. TELL ME. You can't. If I was not convinced before, I AM NOW.
hErE mE oUt.
I'm not saying they are going to burn down Buck's loft, I AM NOT... BUT, imagine Bobby is dropping a patient off at the hospital with Hen and Chim (I know this hardly ever happens but roll with me guys), and our friend, the Burn Unit Nurse, sees him, and is like...
"Bobby?" BECAUSE, he recognises him, from all those years ago in Minnesota. He lived in Bobby's apartment complex, they were somewhat neighbours, and he saw Bobby go into that vacant apartment that night (the night we do not DARE talk about), on his way to work, and was working a night shift at the hospital when suddenly, they get an influx of patients with burns and smoke inhalation from an apartment fire downtown, and he hears in passing from a nurse the address, and his heart sinks because no his fiance was at home asleep at that address and he hears from someone a few weeks later that the fire started in a vacant room due to an electrical issue with a space heater and HE JUST KNOWS.
And Bobby turns around to face him and is like "Sorry, do I know you?" Because Bobby was going through it back then, he doesn't remember this guy, and the guy is like, "Sorry, no, I was mistaken." And he walks away leaving Bobby all like huh.
Then the episode ends with the truck pulling into the firehouse and the camera pans out and we see BURN UNIT NURSE GUY STOOD ACROSS THE ROAD STARING UP AT THE FIREHOUSE BECAUSE DUN DUN DUN- He has some Unfinished Business to attend to.
If this so happens to lead to the burning down of Buck's loft because this guy does his research and he does some stalking and he sees a connection that Bobby has with Buck that he doesn't seem to share with the other members of the team, then well, ya'll didn't see it here first but I fucking called it if so, because you're telling me that is not a CRAZY storyline right there.
BUT, even if not, even if we do not get our beloved loft burning down scene that we have been writing and praying for on Fanfiction for years, you cannot tell me that there is not going to be some kind of dark revenge plot going on in the last four episodes. This nurse is about to cause some HAVOC I CAN SENSE IT. MY SPIDEY SENSES ARE TINGLING GUYS.
Anyway, @whollyjoly and @thetangycheesemanwithaplan had the absolute joy of hearing this from a very sleep-deprived me last week and now that the episode titles have been released, Buck's loft burning down and Burn Unit Nurses revenge plot is going to be my new personality trait. Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU.
#Thank you for coming to my ted talk#911#911 spoilers#season seven#season seven spec#i am talking about burning bucks loft down again#unfinished business#are you kidding me#this SCREAMS revenge plot#evan buckley#bobby nash#bobbys past is about to come bite him in the ass guys I CAN SMELL IT#we love giving our favourite characters more TRAUMA#as if bobby hasn't been through enough guys GIVE THIS MAN A BREAK#first you sink his cruise ship then you burn his sons loft down#sksksks how RUDE#LETS GO PEOPLE#am I god?#am i right with this?#if the episodes would just AIR THEN WE WOULD KNOW WOULDNT WE#tim minear get on this shit#this is good soup right here#get me in the writers room#i have a creative writing degree and i am not afraid to use her#tim minear hire me please#i love you#tim#minear#tim minear#gonna tag him again cause we know he lurks on Tumblr we know he does
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if anyone is worried abt me bc i am not posting: i am in fact doing very bad but i am very good at handling it at this point & i'm going to be okay eventually
#but it has meant the world to get a couple messages from folks here#realized i should maybe post this for folks who know that when i left a few years back it was partially because i was being badly abused#if you knew that and were worried: i'm not experiencing new bad things again!#just have been feeling secure enough for long enough to be fully processing what happened. and it is extremely miserable and hard to do so.#but like. i am beginning to see myself change in the ways that i want to. so it feels rewarding and good to be doing bad in this way.#anyways. love you all#i will hopefully be catching up on videos before tomorrow's show 💛#jam chats#i at the very least will lurk because i do want spoilers#abuse t/#the abuse was from a friend who i'd gotten hired at my workplace.
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Fuck it, tumblr time 🤙
#ive literally been lurking here for years and now that the time has come for me to make a post i have no clue what to do kfjkdjfkdjf#something something tags uhhhh#mianite#mianite fanart#doodlegroves
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.
#I’m only very rarely inclined to get this intimate w my thoughts so I might as well say it NOW butttt I will never not see the dead children#In everything I do#Like legit#I’ve read up on Hind so extensively and seen so many photos of her#And I have a very healthy relationship w the popular Palestinian journalists so she’s not my blorbo or anything#But hearing that memo destroyed me bc bisan is only 23 and she seemed so vivacious#Idk like I do normal people things I can’t just pause on my life#But idk how it feels like to sit at a boba place and enjoy my pearl milk tea w my friends#While the horrors over there don’t just lurk the back of my mind. I do normal things and I’m guilty for having the luxury#And as an Iraqi girl I’m living in the literal ideal timeline#Where my mom decided to immigrate to the us and that’s why I’m here living a normal life like everyone else#It’s like in a different world if I were born in a different time it could’ve so easily been me. I’m one of the Lucky Ones idk#It’s not survivor’s guilt bc it’s not like I had to survive anything like I never had the chance to live in Iraq or anything#But like. If some things had fallen just a little differently#And I keep thinking about how I’d feel if it were happening to Iraq and people behaved the way they’re doing to Palestinians#I’d be so mad#And some people on here are dealing w assholes while bursting at the seams w grief#For losing their loved ones#This is why I’m so fucking angry at anyone who’s complicit#This was a major tangent but basically I feel weird about doing normal things now while simultaneously knowing I can’t just sit and wallow#And watch life pass by as if it’ll do anything#Misery is not a home but I’m struggling to be 100% normal#And I think that this tonal dissonance is reflecting on my blog too bc I can’t go back to just#Posting about all the other normal things I used to. Like I want to but sometimes I feel off.#Is this anything. I haven’t slept all night#I can’t just allow myself to lose interest in everything I used to like and be and just fade away but maybe it’s about accepting that this#Will also always be a part of me now. It’s that awareness that shadows everything I do#or maybe I need a therapist it’s a toss up#I’ll probably feel better once I get my day started but this was cathartic to voice I think#p
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