#but i fully understand that they're not the happy puppies we see them as all the time

[leemeanhoe]

listening to 3racha's albums and 42 is making me so upset i'm actually on the verge of tears the fuck are those lyrics chan what

[ravnervn]

Okay fuck it. I need to exorcise this from my brain. This has haunted me for 2 or 3 years since I saw this film by chance, so I am going to, as best I recall, recap the plot. And then at the end I will say what it is so you can understand why it haunts me. I will say off the bat that you might read this ramble and go "huh this sounds good actually" and it is not. It is not a good movie.

So the film is framed as a story being told to someone -- we're not quite sure whether it's meant to be taken literally or allegorically but the ending and some other details IMPLY it's actually true.

So there's our narrator, who is an average mortal guy living a happy life. And then there's our second protagonist and actual main character, a celestial bureaucrat whose order's numbers are drawn entirely from those who have been denied a chance at a normal happy life. Whilst they can forsake their status to become mortal, as far as the bureaucrat and his peers are concerned, they are happy and performing a valuable service to reality. Our MC has been sent to Earth to investigate a threat to his organisation, and to do so he has infiltrated the narrator's life, seemingly metaphysically convincing everyone that he is the narrator's brother -- except the narrator, who sees through him and ends up convinced to help our MC as it's mutually beneficial; once the mission is done, the narrator's life returns to normal and the MC returns to his role.

So what's happening is that a rival organisation to the MC's has started up and is diverting... Okay so you can see the obvious parallels here and "worship" would fit, but I'll use the film's term of "love" because it's thematically coherent. Anyway, this organisation has a big scheme they're going to hatch to divert all love away from the Rightful Celestial Bureaucracy, and it's up to our protagonists to stop them.

See, the thing going on here is that love is finite. If someone only has one thing to love, they'll love it wholly, but if they have two things to love, that divides the love in two and so on. If they find something they love more than the original object of affection, it could fully supplant it, and that's the crux of the villain's plan.

Because the villain is a fallen celestial bureaucrat who lost his ability to hold onto his celestial form and was forced to become mortal. His plan for revenge is to supplant the love people have for his former order with love for a false idol, thus destroying the whole celestial bureaucracy. The fact this is considered a legitimate and real threat by the celestial bureaucracy implies that this is, metaphysically, how this works. Even if we take this story allegorically, the allegory still has the basis "love is a finite resource and you learn to make do".

Obviously our heroes defeat him, and obviously during this time they've genuinely bonded and decided that maybe having this guy as a brother/maybe having a loving family as a mortal is okay actually. So our celestial bureaucrat becomes a mortal and this whole story becomes just a funny whimsical reframing of the brothers' childhood.

Yes, childhood. Because here is where I unbury the lede and reveal that the villain is the CEO of PuppyCorp, whose plan is to give everyone a free puppy so that they'll love babies less, because the celestial bureaucracy is BabyCorp.

The movie I have just described to you is Boss Baby. I am being deadly fucking serious.

[emiline-northeto]

Okay, so when I said I was afraid for the characters that we don't see in Morse, I didn't mean that Endeavour should do what it did instead.

Since it's still relatively new, I'm putting all my thoughts and yells of anguish below the cut, as well as tagging this for spoilers.

But also, do please come yell with me in my messages if you want, I am having a lot of feelings about this episode.

I was really afraid that they were going to kill off Thursday and/or Bright and they did not but THURSDAY MURDERING SOMEONE IS NOT BETTER.

Look it was an excellent episode and I'm going to have to rewatch it soon now that I know the horrid truth, with that in mind and see where things fall.

I really thought for a while there that Thursday wasn't going to make it through the episode, especially after he had his funny turn, and to be sure I was going to be very mad if he had a heart attack and died because we don't need those parallels with Morse.

But poor Win - she does not deserve to deal with this, and I don't think they're going to tell her and on the one hand I don't want them to tell her because she's been through more than enough, but I also hate everyone keeping important secrets from her. How is Fred going to explain why they have to move, and why Morse will never call? Morse is Win's adopted son as much as he is Fred's, and she misses him in a way that I don't think Morse fully understands.

I did genuinely think there that Morse was confessing his feelings for Joan and then the scene kept going and I was all "what the heck is going on with this show" and then it was all in his head but I'm not mad about that actually, because it was a little corny in it's way but also I loved having that opportunity to see Morse bare his feelings like that in a completely believable way - that man has the worst timing on the face of the planet, so I totally believed it. I don't remember exactly what he said but it was approximately "I haven't said your name because I'm afraid I'd never be able to stop saying it" is very swoony.

Also, before this season I did not know that Morse had a kicked puppy face and this season we've seen it at least twice, but honestly that is eclipsed by the way his voice breaks when he is explaining to Thursday how he knew he did the murder. And Morse is going to carry that (and knowing what happened to Peter, which he spares Thursday) for the rest of his life and that is a horrible, horrible, burden to carry. I'm still processing all the things that Morse chose to do to protect all the Thursdays here.

Kind of loved all the extra "Did we mention Dr. DeBryn is queer, because he's definitely queer" bits, also I am now desperate for fic of him and Miss Frazil being friends and hanging out.

Look this was a very queer episode overall, the "come back to America with me" had strong queer vibes even at the same time of the painful (and made worse by the fact that Jakes doesn't know Morse AT ALL) "What's keeping you here". Oh Jakes, it's so much worse because you don't know how much pain you are reaching there.

Still not sure how I feel about Joan and Strange - kudos to him for giving her an option of an out, I believed that he really meant it. She seemed very confident when she said that that was where she wanted to be, but she has not seemed entirely confident about the marriage this season up to that point. What she said to Sam earlier is right - Strange will take care of her, he will support, he will keep her safe, but Joan and Strange were still so awkward with each other in this episode. I don't think Joan's looking for a love match, but I would have liked for them to be friends. And while Strange clearly cares about her and wants to make her happy, I'm not sure they have a lot of mutual interests. I'm not convinced they have deep conversations on any topic. I don't think it will be a bad marriage but it could be a rather limited one. But maybe they'll become friends now that they're spending more time together.

How DARE they have Anton Lesser doing Prospero's speech over the In Paradisum of Faure's Requiem and then reveal that Bright is in fact sitting by his wife's grave, reciting, and then do all the slightly hazy early season shots - it was perfect and I have no notes. It was lovely in the context of the show, it was perfect as a way to acknowledge the show's place in the Morse universe, and it was a lovely way to show the changing of the guard, as it were, to the original show and how the characters were there.

(Side note if there is anyone else in this fandom who also loves Connie Willis' Blackout/All Clear - I had an immediate thought of "Anton Lesser would make a good Sir Godfrey" when I heard the speech.

It was also lovely to see Monica and Trewlove again, there in the images. I miss them, though honestly good for Monica getting herself out of that relationship with Morse, she can definitely do better. But I wish that that hadn't meant she drifted out of the show (even though I understand why).

The rest of the ending! Where they bring back the turning into John Thaw trick, that was so beautifully and fittingly done. What an episode.

[icemankazansky]

🕯️

🕯️was there a fic that was really hard on you to write, or took you to a place you didn't think it would take you?

Well, I mean, the answer to that is yes. I don't want to give a non-answer to this question, but a lot of stories are hard in a lot of different ways, and a lot of them go their own way. As a writer, I rarely plan ahead much; I don't make outlines, and while I have a general idea of the shape of most stories when I begin writing them, the writing process for me and the way the story becomes is very fluid. I've spoken before about certain challenge stories that were written from requests that made me uncomfortable and that I knew would have to go someplace I didn't want to spend time, but I think honestly the stories that I have struggled with the most in both these ways are stories I have been working on for a long time but have not been able to finish. I've been working on the Top Gun Age of Sail AU for over a decade, and it's not finished, and I don't know that it ever will be. I really want to finish Vox, but it's been almost a year, and I still don't really, fully understand the shape of it and how it has to be built from here, and it's incredibly frustrating.

🕯️how do you think engaging with each other through tumblr, twitter, comments, kudos, creates healthy fandom experiences? How do you deal with that if you're not a social person/experience social anxiety?

The social aspect of fandom is absolutely crucial. I mean, I love fanfiction, reading and writing it both, and creating art and gifs and other things from the media I love, and seeing the art and gifs and things other people create ... but honestly, if I was experiencing all of that in a vacuum, I think it would not be nearly as engaging or rewarding an experience as it is. I have friends I have met through fandom who are among the best friends I've ever had, people I've known for decades and are still there, still ride or die, still make me so happy every time I see their name on a post or a text message. A couple years ago, I attended the wedding reception of one of a girl I met when she left a comment on a fic I wrote. She is one of my dearest friends, and I've known her for ... shit, like 15 years now. We talk often. I know I can count on her if I need anything. She's slept on my couch and we've been to the ocean and to hug baby goats and shopping for leather goods and to eat catfish and hush puppies. When I found a lump in my breast, I called a dear friend I have known for 20-some years and met when I left a comment on a story she wrote. I was there for her when she had breast cancer, and when I was afraid I did, too, she checked in on me and reassured me and told me what to expect, and texted back and forth with me the entire time I was at the imaging center. I have movie night every week with a friend I have known for 20-some years; we have been each other's dedicated beta readers not just on fanfiction but on anything we've written for over a decade. She's in The Kilmer Cure. She is the person I usually turn to when I'm having serious mental health issues, because she has bipolar disorder, too, and she understands. We're planning to get tattoos together.

And even people I haven't known as long ... sometimes they're the only real social interaction I have all day, because I am chronically ill and I am mentally ill and because I am an introvert and all the other reasons it's so hard to get together with people in real life often when you're an adult. And speaking to them, about fandom, about anything, is a huge source of enrichment and comfort and joy to me. And I am not a social person. I do have social anxiety. (Although it's gotten better as I've gotten older and as I've gotten treatment for PTSD, which affects that way more than I thought it did.) But I think one of the great things about fandom relationships via the internet is that you can do things at your own pace. You're not on the spot. If you don't have the spoons for interaction one day, you don't have to reply to that comment right now. You can do it tomorrow. You can watch the conversation in Discord, but you don't have to join in if you're not up to it. And everyone's in different time zones and on different schedules, so everyone's kind of just coming in and participating how and when they can.

[lepusrufus]

Double edged scalpel ch. 7

Ch.1 ch.2 ch.3 ch.4 ch.5 ch.6

Summary: in which Cassandra gets bullied and other sappy shenanigans

---

"Oh Nicole dear, so happy to see you again!" Duke's voice was cheerful as ever, tone masterfully crafted over years of being a businessman.

Nicole, taking small steps inside the ornate and now full of items room, greeted him with uncharacteristic giddiness.

"Duke! How's business?"

"Same as always, I'll be heading to Beneviento later tonight to deliver some tools for her," he took a long drag of his cigar and, noticing green eyes scanning over multiple items and said, "I also have your order."

With a childish grin on her face, she approached him, hands shuffling inside the small bag attached to her belt that all staff members had. She pulled out the money owed for her package and, in return, the Duke placed a decently sized box in her arms. With an oof she shifted it in a less precarious position, it's heavy contents seeming to plot against her small frame.

"Unfortunately I can't stay, duty calls. But thank you Duke."

"No worries, I do understand that your employers can be quite," he took another drag of his cigar, looking for the right word. "...demanding"

Nicole chuckled. That was one way to put it.

"Well until next time dear. Or if you find yourself in need of something else, I'll be here until six."

---

She was only wearing a long white towel when she heard a knock on the door. Assuming it was another maid, or even Anita inquiring about whether or not she'd be joining the rest of them for dinner, she opened the door just a crack.

It was a surprise to see none other than Cassandra standing there, her elegant frame in odd contrast with the modest corridor. She flung the door open, letting the brunette inside and took a quick glance down the hall, making sure no maid was on the floor after fainting due to fright.

"What are you doing here?"

"Aw, are you not happy to see me?" She was pouting, but her tone was joking.

Nicole rolled her eyes, but the small smile on her lips betrayed that she was indeed happy to see her. Cassandra only laughed instead, a beautiful melodious laugh, so unlike the dark cackles heard by prisoners down in the dungeons.

"Just sit down, I need to get dressed," Nicole pointed to the bed before moving to the small dresser and pulling out a clean uniform.

Cassandra went to sit on the slightly disheveled bed, eyes following the redhead's form as she let the towel drop to her feet and started to put on the various layers of her uniform. Then golden eyes darted to the box sitting on the bed. The tape sealing it had been cut not long after Nicole brought it back to her room to make sure all its contents made it safely. Not that she didn't trust the Duke, but postal service was postal service.

"What's this?" Cassandra inquired, trying to read the label but having no success as it had been scribbled over with a marker.

Nicole stilled for a moment, hands frozen on her white button up. She cleared her throat and shyly admitted:

"Actually that's for you. Do open it if you want."

Cassandra's eyes widened, a faint blush appearing on her cheeks. The gesture had really caught her off guard. She gingerly lifted the lid, inspecting it's contents for a moment and then hummed.

"And here I was thinking you like my hair. With how much you love to pull on it and all that."

Nicole, now fully clothed and sporting a deep blush, marched to her and plucked the two boxes of red hair dye from gloved hands. She placed them on her nightstand and, with her voice just slightly more high pitched, she turned to the brunette.

"Those are mine, I meant the rest of it." And, after a chuckle, "I mean have you seen my roots? They're horrible!"

Cassandra only gave her a deadpan look and, after a long moment, said: "I think your hair is beautiful."

She didn't wait for a reply, not that it would be anything more than a stammered mumble of course. Instead she chuckled and returned her attention to the box. She examined the rest of its contents and then gingerly lifted one of the few tomes inside. The cover was glossy and malleable, it's pages shiny and with a distinct typography smell to it. It was so unlike her other books, it's pristine white state making it feel extremely out of place in the castle. She glanced at Nicole inquisitively.

"I do appreciate the gift, don't misunderstand me, but surely you know there's a small bookshop's worth of medical books in this castle."

"With all due respect, from what I've seen most of them are at least somewhat outdated. Interesting, yes, but I thought you'd like to learn something more...modern." Then she pulled out another book. "This is the same one I used while studying forensic pathology. It would make teaching you some things easier. Uh… assuming you want that."

Nicole averted her gaze, suddenly unsure of the usefulness of her gift. Cassandra however grabbed her chin between two fingers and pulled her gaze back on her. She smiled, finding the shy demeanor beyond endearing.

"I'd love that."

A small smile appeared on thin lips and Nicole leaned in to kiss Cassandra. It was soft and short, but no less intimate than the deep kisses they shared so many times in Cassandra's bed.

They had to go anyway.

---

Let's go to the library, Cassandra said. It'll be empty, she said.

When Cassandra swung open the intricate door, only to find the other two sisters lounging on one of the couches, it's not like they could do a one eighty and leave the room. That would've been both impolite and highly suspicious.

Instead, Cassandra grabbed her arm protectively and led them to the reading spot farthest from the other two. They placed one of the textbooks on the small desk and Cassandra took out a notebook. This would've been a lot more fruitful with an actual body on hand, but there were still a couple days until the human flesh supply had to be replenished and Cassandra was beyond eager to start on some things. So, for now, they had to settle for theory alone.

It took all of five minutes for the other two sisters to make their way to their desk. Daniela had a giddy yet curious expression on her face, while Bela seemed as unreadable as ever, if not for a glint in her eyes that betrayed her interest.

"Whatcha dooooing?" Came Daniela's voice, who cocked her head not unlike a curious puppy would while looking at the book's contents.

"Working," Cassandra replied, a slight growl accompanying her words.

"Could've fooled me," Bela spoke from behind the youngest sister, eyeing the hand protectively placed on Nicole's waist.

Cassandra snapped her eyes at the blonde, looking ready to throw her notebook at her head but Bela ignored her sister's ire and addressed Nicole instead.

"What are you studying?"

"I uh- just some basic anatomy concepts. Thought it would be a good idea to start with the things that the older books in the castle don't cover."

Bela only hummed, grabbed an ornate chair nearby, and plopped herself at the desk, opposite from the pair. Daniela mimicked her sister, but instead chose to sit down right by Nicole on the small couch. It took more willpower than she would admit not to glue herself to Cassandra's side when Daniela's face came uncomfortably close so she could look over the book's diagrams. She stood still as a statue though. After a couple seconds of silence and Nicole trying to figure out what she was supposed to do, Daniela drew her head back, looking at her with what was possibly the most serious expression she had seen on the youngest sister.

"You do realize we're not going to hurt you right? How could we lay a finger on our dear sister's lover hmm?"

Nicole's breath caught in her throat. She wasn't sure if it was due to the word used to describe her or how Daniela apparently knew that she was utterly terrified of her. Cassandra sighed beside her and, seeming to at least partially read Nicole's thoughts, clarified:

"Your heartbeat."

Oh. Yeah. Yeah her heart was beating a million miles an hour. And apparently the other three vampiric occupants of the room were able to hear it loud and clear. It did very little to ease her mind.

"Please do calm down, it feels like someone is having drumming lessons. Bad ones," Bela complained, head resting in one of her hands like she was already bored.

"Then shove a sock in your ears," Cassandra snapped.

Bela simply leaned back in her seat and stretched her arms above her head. "And risk not hearing my beloved sisters sing along to some pop song?"

Cassandra shut her mouth, a blush now slowly spreading across her cheeks while Daniela burst out into laughter. Even Nicole couldn't help betraying the brunette and letting out a giggle.

"I didn't know you could sing."

"I can't."

"Au contraire dear Cassie! Should I remind you of the last time Dragostea din tei came on the radio? The pathos!" Daniela reached over Nicole's lap to lightly shake her sister's knee through her giggles.

Cassandra only let out a long groan, face now hidden in her palms. "I hate you both."

"Mhm, we love you too," came Bela's reply, accompanied by a chuckle.

Nicole couldn't keep a small laugh while she snaked her arm behind the brunette to show some form of support against the merciless assailants. Maybe not a complete betrayal.

The scene really had something deep within her heart aching beautifully. It reminded her of the countless times she and Alex would mercilessly tease each other, but still have each other's backs through thick and thin. And for this familiarity to come from people that any sane person would consider bloodthirsty monsters? Hell, maybe they should start considering her a monster too, for the only word she could use to describe them in that moment was endearing.

"So," Bela lightly clapped her gloved hands. "Now that your pulse isn't giving me a headache anymore, what are we doing?"

She had a confident smirk on her face, but her eyes betrayed curiosity. Same for Daniela and, although mixed with a hint of annoyance, Cassandra. She opened the book in front of her, one of general human anatomy, and decided that the digestive system would be a good enough starting point.

---

Their little impromptu lesson didn't last more than two hours. Two hours that proved to Nicole just how oddly human all three sisters can be. Of course she had gotten familiar with Cassandra, intimately so, but the other two still felt like two looming monsters hiding in the shadows. At least up until now.

Bela seemed oddly intrigued by Nicole's explanation, although unlike Cassandra, she seemed to view it more like a story than anything. Daniela seemed slightly more interested, asking questions here and there and even starting to giggle like a middle schooler when they got to the rectum section. That got an eye roll from the other two. Nicole just laughed, finally understanding Mrs Hawkins, her private biology teacher from before she was allowed to step foot in any public school.

After they were done, Bela simply stood up and bid them good night. Danila instead excitedly proposed the skeletal system for next time and picked up the books she abandoned earlier. Then, with a small tower of tomes she went through a door tucked at the very back of the room. Her study, Cassandra had pointed out as they made their way out of the library.

"I didn't know your sisters were interested in medicine too." Nicole kept her voice low, almost as if talking too loudly would disturb the shadowy hallways.

"More or less. Daniela likes it and has a bit of hands-on practice but she has her nose in romance novels more often than not. Bela finds it interesting but botany is what she really loves. That and classic lit." She added the last part with a grimace and Nicole had to wonder which author had offended her personally.

Before she could continue that train of thought though, her gaze moved to the windows, the cloudless sky beyond thick glass panels full of twinkling stars. Her mind kept going back to a few hours earlier and at what Daniela had said. Lover. Did Cassandra truly see her as one or was the youngest sister just being her over the top self. Did she see Cassandra this way? Nicole had not allowed herself to dwell on that up until now, the idea that the brunette saw her as more than an over glorified lab partner with whom she occasionally scratched an itch seemed almost laughable. But the small gestures of affection shown in ways Cassandra seemed to know best were undeniably there. And the familiar flutter in her chest at each of said gestures was also undeniably there.

"What's wrong?"

Cassandra's voice, accompanied by the slight echo through the empty hallway, snapped Nicole out of her thoughts.

"Oh um- nothing." She sounded as convincing as someone trying to sell you a fork while showing you a spoon.

And Cassandra didn't seem to buy it. She moved in front of the redhead, walking backwards with no concern over possible furniture to collide into along the way.

"You always get this… face when something's bothering you."

"I do not-" the indignation in her tone was weak, little more than an attempt to change the subject.

"Mhmm you do. You normally look focused. Kind of like, if someone tried to scare you by throwing an eyeball at you, you'd laugh." She would. "Now? Now you look like a rabbit that has no time to run and is just laying low hoping whatever's hunting it passes by."

Nicole shut up for a moment, only looking at the brunette in front of her incredulously. Maybe she was far more attentive than she gave her credit for.

"Uh. Just thinking." At a raised dark eyebrow, the no shit went unsaid, so Nicole tried to elaborate. "About earlier. When we were with your sisters and Daniela uh- Daniela called me your lover."

Saying that the words felt awkward on her tongue was close to the year's biggest understatement. It felt like pulling out teeth would be an easier task. Nicole had never been good with her words, having learned since childhood to keep her mouth shut. But the fact that Cassandra seemed to share her struggle brought some semblance of comfort.

"And?" As if they were talking about the weather.

"And… was she right in describing me as such?"

She couldn't help a small gulp when the brunette stopped walking, looking at her with a frown. Any sane person would be at the very least somewhat afraid in this situation. Sanity however was scarce these days as Nicole was afraid, though not of the bodily harm that may come from her inquiry, but rather of Cassandra's answer.

"Nicole, your tongue has been in my mouth." Amongst many other places.

The redhead's cheeks turned a slight shade of crimson and she mumbled for an answer. She wasn't sure how to tell her that sleeping together did not automatically make them lovers. But then again, Cassandra's thoughts remained a mystery more than anything.

Thankfully the brunette took the metaphorical reins of the conversation and stepped forward. She wrapped her hands around Nicole's arms, gentler than one would imagine possible from her, and bent down to whisper no more than an inch away from her ear.

"I'll have you know, I'm not particularly fond of letting anyone I don't deem important touch me. Especially not the way you do."

The words made something flutter in Nicole's chest, an unfamiliar and comforting warmth. Said warmth got chipped away at the slightest bit when Cassandra pulled back to look her in the eyes.

"Should I take it that it's not mutual then?" Cassandra's tone was nonchalant, almost as if she didn't truly care about the answer. She could keep doing whatever she wanted either way, afterall who was going to stop her? But to someone who got familiar with all her small quirks and habits, the waver in her voice was more than clear.

"No." The world slipped from her lips with no hesitation.

No hesitation, because the more she thought about it, and she didn't need to think a lot mind you, the more Nicole realized that she couldn't remember a time when she felt the way she did here. Sure the initial threat of death looming over her head was anything but pleasant, but once that melted into affection and nights spent in Cassandra's arms the thought of leaving didn't as much as graze her mind.

"No, no. It is," she repeated, more certainty making its way into her tone.

At that Cassandra smiled. A small, almost shy one would say if they knew her well enough, smile. Her shoulders seemed to lose some of their tension when she leaned down again, her lips stopping not even an inch away. Nicole wasted no time leaning forward, their mouths meeting in a kiss that mixed softness and need beautifully. Their lips slid against each other until, surprisingly, it was Cassandra to pull back and sigh.

"Come sleep, we have some cutting up to do in the morning."

Nicole frowned. "Tomorrow? Wasn't that supposed to be due in a few days?"

A devilish grin appeared on black lips, fangs shimmering ominously in the low light. "Bela caught a foolish man-thing sneaking around the forest on the castle grounds. She's really excited to turn this one into a nice steak."

The redhead only let out an oh in acknowledgement. Foolish indeed. At least they could finally put into practice a few autopsy tricks Nicole had been itching to show her.

She let herself be guided back to Cassandra's chambers and into her bed, that she had grown intimately familiar with. The last thing she felt before falling asleep was the brunette's cool skin, pressed against her own. A welcomed comfort among the myriad of soft pillows that surrounded them. Nicole wondered briefly if being undead meant it was hard to keep yourself warm, but the thought quickly slipped away as she fell into a dreamless sleep.

[terrence-silver]

Lets say Twig and beloved forced into an arranged marriage by both of their parents as a type of business transaction, how would their wedding go? Would he come to love them?

Depends what kind of person beloved is.

If they're a calculative, deeply, vapid, disingenuous, materialistic person themselves (ironically, like the whole upper crust society Terry was born into and the very same thing he himself will later become), then they probably have something of an open, Lavender marriage where both of them do whatever they want outside of the vestiges of this mutually advantageous arrangement of a tactical business-matrimony. Means that the marriage is treated like a deeply micromanaged merger of two huge, global companies (which it, at its core, is) rather than a match of a couple. They might not even live together outside of basic formalities. Might not even be on the same continent or see each other at all. They're merely legally connected like two entities with a certain net worth might be. Then again, this manner of individual doesn't exactly classify as beloved. They're merely a link connecting two conglomerates, so we won't count that. At best, they're allies who understand exactly why this was necessary and how they profited off of it. They undoubtedly both have each their own beloved. Or even multiple. They know of each other’s proclivities and approve of it. That, or they flat out don’t care what the other does.

If the beloved is understanding and a genuinely kind individual that has a certain empathy, tenderness and debonair nature that might appeal to a skinny, probably shy pre-war Twig and a traumatized, shaken post-war Twig, then I do think he'd fall for them and a business arrangement transforms into a love match immensely quickly because Terry starts viewing them, in a very literal sense, as his. His property. Something he owns. He latches unto them because they ease the hurt he brought back from the army. They're his lawfully wedded spouse, yes, but they belong to him, because his parents made this union happen and in his eyes, it is as if they gave beloved to him as an actual human gift. It might very well be phrased in that sense too. They're Terry's present for returning from Vietnam alive and they're his 'adapting to society' welcoming badge. He treats it a such. Heck, his own partners might treat it as such to get Twig to warm up to the idea by buttering him up! He becomes needy, possessive and territorial, starts expecting marital duties to be preformed regularly.

He's happy. He's skipping around. He's beaming.

Something that was supposed to be a sordid, unavoidable duty at first imposed by his family suddenly becomes like a holiday and he's like a boy who's adopted a cute puppy for Christmas. It is unbelievable how fast he'd slip into the role of a husband and how much he strives to overcompensate by overdoing things. He goes out of his way to control beloved purely because he couldn't control the fact that he's been placed into an arranged marriage. Doesn't mean there isn't a certain bitterness there that bleeds into sexual frustration and want. In a contradictory sense, he's also akin to a teenager having a flustered first date (which is valid, because he's young and he would've missed a great many developmental markers due to his time in the war) as much as he is on the verge of becoming a despotic, oddly puppy-eyed, domineering spouse with a worryingly long list of strict 'to do's' he wants he his new partner to complete for him and with him (which is to be expected, because his family name comes with the expectations of turning into a tyrant and living up to a peculiar standard of behaviour). So, to summarize; beloved is his 'welcome back from the war' gift. He loves them. This is the best present he's ever received. He's almost too happy with this situation.

Terry was literally just presented with a fully fledged individual.

That is all his.

What's not to like?

[losojos-decupido]

leaving a friend to a mountain of work is a crime, but so is forcing one's presence upon them, fogado reminds himself. nobody likes a slacker, but pushiness is seen just as unfavorably. striking a balance is important.

so when mitama insists that she is more than capable of taking care of whatever else needs to be done, fogado forces himself to acknowledge it. the cutting board stares back at him, gory and weeping, chunks of evisceration atop it waiting to be slopped into puppy chow bowls, and he realizes that too much time spent in this room will drive him absolutely crazy. he can already feel himself twitching, eye and palm and tip of finger. there is only so much of him left to resist.

" we-e-ell, if you're sure you'll be okay... then i guess i'll take you up on your offer, " fogado replies sheepishly, grabbing the knife like burning wood and slapping the blade against the uncut meat as fast as he possibly can. who even cares about quality anymore? they're puppies. they just need to eat it without choking. " i'm sure the knights didn't mean to tell me to prioritize work; it's not like i told them i had homework to do. "

mitama never breaches the doorway, never tips into his line of sight. she never looks at him, and it occurs to fogado that perhaps she knows he does not want to be seen. that, or she understands that not everything needs to be seen? either way, he had fully been expecting her to come check on him after the noises he'd made; that she hasn't is relieving to him, but he doesn't let his guard down. mitama does not need to concern herself with him. if she did, she'd only ever see his barrier walls. not fun, right?

perhaps it's for the best if they stay this way. it is not a decision that harms fogado to make; it is not the first time he has made it, nor the tenth, nor the hundredth. mitama gets to keep her starry-eyed buddy who cracks jokes and smiles like the sun, and fogado can keep a distant eye on her. she deserves to be just as happy as the rest of the world that he adores.

once the final cut is made, fogado hastily swipes the meat into buckets and drops them at the opening of the room. " all done! " he chirps, already sweeping to the side exit. disappearing like a whisper, voice fading on the breeze. " thanks and sorry again, mitama. i'll drop by your room later with a thank-you present! "

the wolf rider among us

toa anniversary board: riding +1

[sugasshaay]

「Spa night」

With Sakusa kiyoomi.

It's not easy to persuade Sakusa to engage in “spa nights” or whatever you to call them. But if you give him the puppy eyes? He'll never say no to you.

Violently yet lovingly dragged to the bathroom. He could literally push you off of him with just his pinky, but he didn't, because he loves you. All he did was just let you drag him to the bathroom. Once you both were there you started to show him all the products you got yesterday from the store, where they're supposed to go and what they are good for.

━━━━

“Sit.” You said opening the newly bought facial products. “Where?” You looked at kiyoomi through the mirror in front of you. “I don't know, find a place to sit.” You said looking back down at the stuff in your hands. “What the fuck do you mean find a place to sit!? The only place I could sit in is literally either on the floor or the toilet?” You turned around to face him stuff still in your hands. “Alright then, choose between them.” You said waiting for him to pick. “Fine, the toilet it is.”

You smiled at his response, turning around and getting a fluffy headband to move his hair out of his face. You came closer to him your hand approaching his face, you put your pointer finger under his chin. Moving his face upwards to meet yours. You stretch the headband, so it could fit to go through his face, putting it on him and taking small pieces of his hair and pushing them back.

“Aww look at how adorable you look omi!!” You moved away from his face, so he could see himself in the mirror, his expression did not change whatsoever. Your face dropping to a bored expression upon seeing his uninterested expression. “Oh come on! The least you could do is to pretend to be happy.” you said pouting a bit. “O.m.g! I look amazing wow! Thank you for putting this headband on me! My beautiful partner!!” you stopped opening the clay mask package midway after hearing what he just said. Slowly turning around to face him expression bored as ever. Although if you look closely he can see that you're holding in a small smile from forming.

“Alright! So I'm going to put this clay mask on your face. And after ten minutes we'll remove it.” You said scooping a bit of the product with a silicone mask brush. Stepping closer to kiyoomi again to apply the mask on him, you feel his hand on your waist pulling you closer to him. You give him a confused look not understanding what he wants “sit on my lap. It would be easier this way.” You let him pull you in and help you sit on his lap later after that you continued to apply the face mask on him.

"What is it" Kiyoomi had been starring into your eyes for quite some time. "What? Oh, no, your eyes are just pretty to look at." His answer made you smile. Approaching him and giving him a small kiss on the lips.

You removed the face mask from his face after the ten minutes had passed. You gently massage his face with your wet palms. After you were done, you dried his face with a face towel. You turned around to face the bathroom counter once more, this time to obtain some serum and combine it with some moisturiser cream. Meanwhile, Kiyoomi's chin rests on your shoulder, keeping an eye on your movements. You shifted your gaze back to him and began to apply the moisturizer and serum together. You rub the mixture on him till his face is fully coated with it.

"Are we finished?" He says it with a sigh of relief. You nodded and took his hand in yours as you walked him to your room. Once you're both in the room, gently force him back onto the bed. Turning around and rummaging through your drawers once more. When you've finally found what you're looking for, turn around to show Kiyoomi, who is confused as hell. "Is that a sleeping mask?" You nodded and grinned "mhm and you will put it on."

See you next time

[goji-pilled]

Okay @princekirijo you want an essay? Well here it is now, or as I like to call it Felix's "Asumari is great and this fandom has no fucking taste" rambling and infodump. Congrats fellas, thanks to Prince you ALL get an asumari essay. But before that I'll try to give you a rundown of Mari and Asuka. 

(I'm also so sorry for putting this long ass post on everyone's dashboard)

(Spoiler warning for Evangelion 3.0+1.0 Thrice Upon a Time!!)

Alright on one hand we have Mari Illustrious Makinami. Her whole deal? She's a walking ray of sunshine, literally lol. Unlike any other character in the Evangelion franchise she doesn't suffer from her trauma, she's quite literally the only healthy and functioning human being, she's just slightly leaning towards "batshit crazy" with the stunts she pulls 🤷‍♂️. Other than that she just loves living, she loves being with people, she keeps moving forward, stays positive and decides to live life to it's fullest even after she experiences loss and multiple apocalyptic events (Second Impact, Third Impact, etc.) and she really just embodies the joy of living. That's all there is to her, or at least all we know.

On the other hand, we have Asuka Langley Shikinami who is... well it's hard to explain what she is to be honest. She's part-German and part-Japanese and part of a line of clones specifically made with the purpose to pilot an Evangelion and later on be used as a sacrifice to trigger another Impact (ITS COMPLICATED I KNOW-) Asuka is, unlike Mari, very much suffering from her trauma. She doesn't have her parents and has a very deep seated belief that she's completely alone, which she says doesn't matter as long as she can pilot the Eva. She also very much wants to fight and kill angels all by herself, and it's seriously messing with her when she can't achieve that.

Now we get to the more interesting parts (hopefully this so far wasn't too confusing, then again it's Eva and even I can't fully wrap my head around it all LMAO)

In the second Rebuild movie (Evangelion 2.0 You can (not) advance) we get introduced to both of them, Mari's introduction scene (in the original English dub) has her pilot an Eva and singing about how she'll take the world on by herself, while in the third movie's (Evangelion 3.0 You can (not) redo) opening scene she's piloting the Eva again but this time it's together with Asuka (in her own Unit 02 though) and during that Mari sings about how wonderful it is not to be alone. It's nothing big yet, but it's a really cute detail me thinks,,, you know what else I love about them? They bicker and they banter and it's genuinely so fun to listen to shskdhsuwj

(For a quick catch up: During the end of 2.0 Shinji (the protagonist) triggers another apocalyptic event, the Near Third Impact, and was only stopped due to Kaworu (the guy in my pfp) stepping in. Also between 1.0/2.0 and 3.0/3.0+1.0 are about 14 years (without Shinji bc he's like comatose) where A LOT happens AND we learn in 3.0 that Eva pilots don't age physically bc of "The curse of the Eva"... honestly Eva is wild lmao)

Okay okay I'll get back to it!

So one thing that happens is that Asuka during 2.0 develops a crush on Shinji (girl why-), unfortunately things take a turn for the worse. Asuka had volunteered to be the testpilot for a new Eva (Unit 03), she seemed happy at the time and it was a really sweet build up with the "I can smile, I didn't know I could still do that."-line. And then? Then it turns out the Ninth Angel had infected Unit 03 (Angels are basically the Kaijus they fight using Evas btw). The thing goes on a loose and Shinji is forced to fight it (With Asuka inside mind you), he refuses and his father uses an autopilot to destroy Unit 03. And boy did it destroy the angel, well it and it crushed Asuka between its jaws (you can actually hear her scream btw haha pain :)).

Asuka survived though, but the whole incident cost her her humanity and she ended up becoming an angel herself/she took the place of the Ninth. But despite that, there's one person who keeps believing in Asuka's humanity, who fiercely believes Asuka is still a human and tells her as much.

Yep, that one person is Mari and she keeps holding onto that belief until the very end when Asuka uses her last resort, which is using the power of an angel (Doing so was a guaranteed death sentence btw). Mari's own words (in the German dub) were, "Princess, you're giving up being human…" AND IT MAKES ME SO EMO GOD FUCK

While I'm at it, Mari and Asuka are a fucking killer combo as a team. They rely on each other for support in combat, listen to the other's orders and advice. Especially in Asuka's case it's kind of a big deal that she so openly relies and counts on Mari's support. Like these two trust each other with their damn lifes!!! Holy shit!!

Guess what though, they also have nicknames for eachother. Mari always calls Asuka "Princess" or "(Your) Highness" while Asuka calles Mari "Four-eyes" / "Four-eyed chrony (idk how you spell that tbh RIP" Even better though, in the German dub Asuka calls Mari "Brillerella" as in a combination of "Brille" (German for glasses) and "Cinderella",,,,Cinderella and her Prince,,,Brillerella and her Princess,,, man, that was a gay fucking move of the translation team. Spoiler: I owe them my life.

Funfact: There's exactly two times throughout the Rebuild movies where Mari uses Asuka's actual name. These two times being when she watches Asuka "die" and be used as a sacrifice for Gendo's selfish plan and when later on she begs Shinji, "So please the Princess… Asuka needs your help!" And the best part? That wasn't even the first time she did that. The mentioned line came from 3.0+1.0, but she did that too in 3.0 with the, "At least save the Princess!" line (although her tone was much more...pissed, like she was really angry lol)

Remember the crush Asuka had on Shinji? Well due to the Unit 03 incident a whole lot of other shit got mixed into that and her feelings for him in general became really bitter (understandably so). Now Mari being who she is sometimes teases Asuka about said old crush but she really does want Asuka to get closure and sort that mess out. 

As an example for the teasing, in 3.0 there's a scene that goes like this (please imagine Mari with a literal :3 face while saying that):

"Unit! Are you back in the game?"

"I'm on it, your Highness. But first things first, how was our little puppy (Shinji)? Did he sit like a good little boy?"

"He's exactly the same! Same stupid face talking mayhem!"

"That goofy face of his, that's what you wanted to see? Riiiiight?"

"Shut up! I went there to bat him one!... And I feel better!"

There's also a very short bonus manga that was released in Japan for Thrice Upon a Time's release that has Mari trying to convince Asuka to come with her on the mission to get Shinji, given everything that follows, it's just another thing to prove my point. And the final bit relating to that is this:

"Feeling better now?"

"Yeah, I do feel better."

That's the exchange Asuka and Mari have after they talked to Shinji, it's nothing special but I think it's really sweet and this time Asuka actually sounded like she was feeling better instead of when she was screaming after she nearly broke pretty thick glass with her fist (If she had hit someone with that much force she definitely would've broken something omggg #violentimpulsesgang)

To get back on track though: I already mentioned it but during the second half of 3.0+1.0 Asuka "dies" (and honestly that entire scene is worth its own in-depth post because its just one huge parallel to The End of Evangelion), the point is: You can tell that the loss of Asuka honestly hits Mari hard. Not only because of how Mari screams Asuka's name but also because of her expressions. They're pained, like really fucking pained and Mari even apologizes to her that she has to fall back due to the fact that she's injured AND because eveything is going wrong.

After the events of Evangelion 3.0 these two got seperated from eachother, Mari was with WILLE (the organization both of them are with) and on board of Wunder (the ship WILLE basically operates from) while Asuka was in a Village full of (Near) Third Impact Survivors. When they do meet again it went like this:

Asuka, barely back, comes to the door and calls, "I'm back." And within seconds of Asuka stepping into their room after the door opens Mari already runs towards her, arms wide open and she says, "Welcome back, your Highness! Good job. I missed you so much!" And she says that while she literally nuzzles into Asuka,,,like,,,what the fuck gay people real!!! 

Best part? Asuka clearly has enough strength to push Mari completely away if she were uncomfortable, but she doesn't. Asuka merely wanted enough space to look at the room (because Mari managed to horde even more books lol) and play her game. During their entire renunion Mari keeps hugging her, and part of me thinks that perhaps deep down Asuka actually enjoys the feeling of physical affection.

Before we get to the last point though, let me say that Asuka and Mari have scenes in 3.0+1.0 that parallel Shinji and Kaworu's from 3.0. (Fyi Kaworu loves Shinji (yeah, like that, and 3.0 was basically them being gay as fuck for an hour) so like...do I even need to explain? 

And then of course there's also this, the "Take care of yourself, Princess…" line. That is the last time Mari talks to Asuka and as much as that line alone already is so much, it's Mari's expression in particular that kills me. Because this? This soft, almost bittersweet expression she has, as she basically says goodbye? Because she knows Asuka will finally be happy and safe? It just makes me feel so much actually. Man.

In the end it's a fact that Mari loved Asuka, wether that is interpreted as platonic or romantic by someone is up to them. But it is a fact that Asuka was loved enough that someone wanted to hug her, was happy to see her, to praise her, was hurt by her loss, wanted her to be safe, that someone told her "Take care of yourself…" Asuka was really and honestly so loved that someone would tell her, "I missed you."

But Asuka? Asuka was too hurt, too wrapped up in her own head to actually see how loved she was by Mari (and other people) that she genuinely believed she's completely alone and always will be alone.

It makes the "Take care of yourself" line hit even harder to me, because it's not only Mari's goodbye, but it's a goodbye during the one time Asuka allowed herself to be vulnerable and admit what she really wanted.

And honestly? All of this? Its makes me feel so many things and I just love them  so much man.

[joysmercer]

great fic but my heart broke when i realized fabian and nina were probably not going to get back together tbh

see, on one hand, I get it. they were each other's first loves, were together for like 4 months total and truly deserved more time, and they never really got closure on their relationship. I genuinely believe, even fifteen years down the line, that they would still trust each other with their lives. them getting back together romantically would fix the last broken bit and give them their happy ending.

but on the other –

fabian and nina do not keep in touch during the events of s3, so by the time tor comes around, they've both had a full year to move on. we don't really see fabian sitting around and pining for more than a few days and it's safe to assume nina doesn't either – not to mention that it's canon that fabian has a fling (if not a full-on relationship) with mara after graduation.

could they have found their way back to each other? sure. but there's a lot of heartbreak and heartache they would both have to get over, and i don't see that first message, that first real conversation, happening at least until their second year of uni. I like to think that they eventually get back to being good, if not close, friends…but nothing more.

but let's say, somehow, they do reconnect, and get back together, sometime in college. frankly, it would be a messy situation – not impossible, but difficult, and i think they relationship would eventually end with them growing apart instead of them growing together. they would constantly try and reconcile the people they are at that point with the people they were at the end of s2, when they last saw each other in-person, and honestly? you change a lot in 12th grade and uni. there are memories and experiences and (at least in fabian's case) literal trauma they've experienced individually that the other would never be able to fully understand. and the feelings they have for one another, the racing heartbeats and butterflies in the stomach and shy smiles, they're no longer as grounded as they used to be because they're both different people than they used to be.

all of that, of course, assuming they’re in the same place and not trying to do a long-distance thing.

after college – well, five years have passed at this point and I just don't see the puppy-love sticking around for that long.

they were there for each other when no one else was, but that doesn't mean they were meant to be.

and that's okay.

[vlindervin7]

I love ure fics, i was thinking maybe a kieu my/fatou one where they're in fatous bed and the cash queens come over, and then idk how it'd go it depends if it's pre/post fatou telling them about kieu my but basically just cute awkwardness from them and not knowing what to do/say and the cash queens realising kieu my isn't the ''ice queen'' they thought she was 🥰🥰

Can u make a fic about Kieu my and Fatou cuddling on their bed and kissing, pure fluff ✨from Kieu my’s pov

Here to say that I loved your kieutou works! Thanks for sharing them with us! Could you write something about the girls still being unsure about the relationship because they don’t know kieu my well and them witnessing how fatou and kieu my are together? It could be after everything is solved between the cashqueens and kieu my (she has apologized to ava for the past) but the girls aren’t still 100% sure of her feelings for fatou and get to see how soft kieu my is for her.

Read on ao3

Fatou is looking at her and the weird thing, the slightly uncomfortable thing, is that Kieu My wants her to keep looking. Her gaze is hot on her, scalding, and it almost burns uncomfortably, but it’s just on the right side of too much, like a hot shower after a winter day. Usually when people look at Kieu My she has the impression of standing on a podium, under bright spotlights, focused on the play she’s putting on. Fatou’s gaze is like a breeze that catches her off guard and caresses her face, makes her shiver, but feel held, too. It’s like she said that one time: Fatou sees right through her. She’s not party Kieu My to her, not popular Kieu My, not the picture perfect pretty princess she pretends to be. She’s just Kieu My, in her purest form. And Fatou loves her for it. She doesn’t even have to try.

She doesn’t have to try.

She doesn’t have the words to describe how incredible that feels. Sometimes it feels like nothing comes naturally to her. Every single thing she does, every person she interacts with, is a challenge she needs to overcome, something she needs to adapt too. But with Fatou… With Fatou the only thing she ever had to actively try to do is staying away from her and not fall too deep. She miserably failed at that, clear by the fact that she’s currently in her bed and in so deep she can’t remember what the outside of it looks like. Effortless.

She’s snapped out of her contemplation when Fatou shifts on her side slightly and reaches out to stroke her cheek softly like summer.

‘What are you thinking about?’, she asks.

Kieu My hesitates for one second, before recalling her freshly made realisation that around Fatou it takes more effort to hold back than to let her in, so she answers truthfully. ‘How easy this is.’

‘This?’ Fatou’s still absentmindedly moving her thumb against Kieu My’s cheek.

Kieu My gestures between the empty space separating their two warm bodies on the bed. ‘This.’

A smile grows on Fatou’s face. ‘Us?’

Kieu My nods once, and moves closer to Fatou on the bed, until her forehead rests against Fatou’s chest and her arm is around her. She can’t remember ever feeling this safe to just let go.

She stays there for a moment, simply breathing. With every passing second she feels her thoughts slow down more and more, until what’s left is a background buzz she can easily ignore for the feeling of Fatou all around her.

After a while, she lifts her head from her chest and looks up at her. Fatou squeezes her tight, before letting go. Kieu My moves upwards until they can look each other in the eye. And now she’s smiling again.

She can’t help but laugh at how happy she is. She feels so calm and somehow it doesn’t really scare her anymore.

Fatou looks at her with a semi questioning look, but most of it is fond like she gets it, so Kieu My simply shakes her head and kisses her. It soon turns a bit more intense than originally planned, but she doesn’t mind and, by the look of things, neither does Fatou.

She’s just starting to really get lost in the feeling of Fatou’s lips on her when a sudden knock on the door shocks her right out of it.

***

When she knocks on the door and then passes her head through the crack in the doorway when there’s no answers, Ava is met with the sight of Fatou and Kieu My quickly sitting up as if suddenly caught doing something private. Ava figures they were in a way, judging by the state of their hair and the sheets, the embarrassed looks they’re sending each other. Especially Kieu My, usually exuding such strong confidence, is looking anywhere but at Ava, possibly in an attempt to hide how flushed she is.

‘Can we come in?’, Ava finally asks, referring to Nora and Mailin standing behind her in the hallway.

Fatou checks her phone and, upon seeing the time, grimaces. ‘Sorry’, she mumbles sheepfully. ‘We lost track of time.’ She looks at Kieu My when she says it, and she seems to relax the slightest bit seeing Fatou’s expression.

‘It’s fine, chibi’, Ava answers. And it is. She knows Fatou doesn’t mean it and wouldn’t deliberately forget about their meeting. Who can blame her really? She’s so in love Ava can feel it radiating off of her.

‘We get it’, Nora says, with a teasing smile, making her way into the room and settling on one of the poofs. Taking on an old lady voice, she continues, ‘I remember being young and in love.’

Fatou lifts her hand to half-heartedly hide behind, says ‘shut up’ and drops it. ‘We lost track of time.’

‘We’d gathered, yeah’, Mailin answers from where she’s now sitting cross-legged on the floor.

Ava, now being the only one still left standing, makes her way to Fatou’s desk and sits down on the chair. She considers the bed for a second, but with Fatou and Kieu My on it, it suddenly feels like it should be just heirs, a small space carved out for them in the midst of the room, their own private island.

She notices Kieu My still hasn’t said anything since the girls walked in and has avoided eye contact beyond the small smile of greeting, but she also notices Fatou’s hand moving closer to Kieu My’s on the bed and Kieu My’s shoulders relaxing when she finds it, like Fatou’s touch is the anchor she needed to pull herself above water.

‘So are we still up for lunch?’Ava asks finally, pointedly glancing at what Fatou’s wearing, obviously still the clothes she slept in, but then she makes sure to catch her eye and smile to make sure she understands that she’s not upset.

She doesn’t think any of the girls mind waiting a bit longer. They’d been so wrapped up in their own worlds lately that they’d failed to take note of how the perpetually bright light in Fatou’s spirit had dimmed over the past few weeks. It’s especially obvious seeing her now, with that sparkle in her eyes and smile that would take more effort to try to suppress than to constantly wear. Her little quips come quicker and more often like when they first became friends, and she’s always been the warmest person Ava’s ever met, but now she seems to point that warmth at herself, too, instead of giving it all away and leaving herself shivering.

Of course!’, she Fatou reassures quickly and loudly, ‘I just uh. Need to get dressed and all that.’

She looks at Kieu My then, just a raise of her eyebrows in question, and Kieu My answers with something between a shrug, grimace and smile. Ava doesn’t speak fluent Kieu My the way Fatou clearly does, but she thinks she can safely say she’s uncomfortable. Ava hadn’t really paid it any mind before, but she suddenly realises she’s never seen Kieu My not dressed up before, bare-faced and bleary-eyed, wearing one of Fatou’s old t-shirts. She looks surprisingly vulnerable, holding herself differently like she’s shed off all her armour. It makes sense, Ava thinks, for her to surrender in the safe presence of Fatou, but she probably wasn’t prepared to forget all defences when it comes to Ava, Mailin and Nora. It almost makes Ava want to look away.

‘The reservation’s at twelve, so we have a little time left’, Nora comments after checking her phone, and Fatou looks away from Kieu My upon hearing her voice.

She hesitates a moment before saying, ‘I’ll be quick’, and making to get out of bed, but Ava stops her. She knows why she hesitated, and while, since Kieu My apologised to Ava and they smoothed everything out, Ava’s completely fine with the idea of her being Fatou’s girlfriend, she admits that she’s still not entirely comfortable around her. She’s never spent much time with her after all, but Fatou’s possibly the person she loves most in this world. She should get to know her girlfriend.

‘Are you coming with, Kieu My?’, she asks then. She’ll start as soon as possible.

‘That would be cool!’, Mailin adds, and Nora is enthusiastically nodding from her place on the pouf. After smiling at Ava gratefully, Fatou turns to Kieu My with her puppy eyes fully turned on, and even before Kieu My gives in Ava already knows she won’t stand a chance.

‘Yeah, sure. Thanks’, Kieu My says, looking at Ava in particular. Ava recognises part of the same sentiment she just felt reflected in Kieu My’s eyes. Maybe they haven’t found much they have in common yet, but they can start building a bond stemming from their shared love for Fatou.

She gets up from the bed, clearly wanting to get dressed as soon as possible. When she does, Fatou falls on her back and stretches out her arms with an angelic smile on her face. ‘Help me up?’

Kieu My fondly rolls her eyes before obliging and pulling her all the way up and out of bed. Fatou drops a kiss on her lips when she’s finally out of bed, and Kieu My flushes but she lets it happen.

‘We’ll be back’, Fatou exclaims, grabbing Kieu My’s hand and pulling her out of the room.

After the door closes behind them, the girls catch each other’s eyes and burst into laughter at the ridiculousness of their friend. Ava ‘s so happy to be back on good terms with them. The few weeks they were fighting was so hard for her, even though she maybe didn’t show it. She truly loves them a lot and to feel so completely misunderstood and taken for granted by the people who are supposed to have her back always is not an experience she’d care to repeat. They all need to do a little better.

It doesn’t take Fatou and Kieu My much time to get back to them, the waiting filled with chatter and laughter. Ava doesn’t mean to listen in on their conversation, but she’s sitting the closest to the door, and as much as tries to block it out, she can’t help but overhear Fatou ask, ‘You feeling okay now?’, standing in front of the door to her room, clearly waiting to make sure Kieu My is comfortable before rejoining the others.

It’s quiet for a moment in which Ava imagines Kieu My is nodding or something similar. Then, in a quiet voice she answers, ‘Yeah. Just felt like I was violently being woken from some perfect dream. I wasn’t prepared.’ She says the last part accompanied by a laugh as if trying to brush it off, but knowing Fatou, she’ll take it seriously.

It’s silent again, for a slightly longer time. Ava tries not to actively imagine what’s happening to give them privacy, but she has an idea anyway. Her brain doesn’t have the same moral compass as she herself does. After a few minutes, Fatou breaks the silence and whatever else that’s going on, ‘Ready now?’

When Kieu My laughs this time, it sounds much more genuine. ‘Ready. Love you.’

‘Love you, too.’

When they enter the room, Ava pretends to shake herself out of something she was reading on her phone. She doesn’t know if she’s convincing, she’s never been much of an actress after all, her emotions right there for everyone to see, but she thinks the girls are too wrapped up in each other to notice, either way.

‘Let’s go?’, she asks enthusiastically, getting up from her chair.

‘Let’s go!’, Fatou cheers, pulling the others into her infectious excitement, holding Kieu My’s hand and smiling blindingly at Ava.

Yeah, inviting Kieu My was definitely a good idea, Ava decides. There’s not many things better than seeing her chibi so completely happy.

[foxymoxynoona]

Absolutely love amended but I just can't see the happy ending man.. Surely there's affection between both of them, they care and want the best for each other, for sure. However it seems to me like there are too many flaws for it to work? With the big fight, we have a clear view of how they work with their defense mechanism under pressure and shock and it's not good. To me, there will always be an imbalance in the relationship, because no matter what, you say dumb shit you don't mean when you're angry and Jungkook will throw in the fact it's his money, his house and etc. while Belle will threaten to leave with the kids. It's bound to happen again, I think. And with Belle traumas, I'm quite sure she might, no matter how in love she falls, keep in the back of her mind the fact that Jungkook did pay for everything, that her situation now could be gone in a breath if Jungkook wanted to. But that could be entirely different once she starts her new job (so happy for her) and save enough money—again, her mind might just be full of 'secure the money so the kids can be safe if Jungkook ever kicks us out'? Unhealthy. So there's definitely a stronger one on the relationship, dependence happening. That's not good to me, if they're always going to come back to that fact at some point. Belle has always been on her toes, ready to leave to keep her kids safe and I don't see her fully trusting Jungkook, no matter what. And Jungkook could definitely question her intentions as time flies—if she loves him or if she's here for the money to keep her kids safe! The foundation is fragile, unstable imo. Also, Jungkook is quite childish at times, even if he does a lot of efforts for Belle. He gets hurt too and say stupid stuff, making her even more insecure. They don't communicate very well, do they? Patricia won't be here forever, they only speak their mind when she comes around. And she pointed out how Jungkook would go for the 'easy' explanation when the real one would just hurt Belle, but that would help her understand him. It's hard to change that too! And I don't agree on people blaming Belle only. They're to blame together, one is not wrong and the other right—they have flaws, on different levels, yeah, but that doesn't make one less important than the other. But sooo many, and some are yet to come into the mess of it all, like the basement thing! It's exhausting for both of them. And I'm sure they love each other but sometimes, love's not enough—sometimes things don't go the way you want it to and that's okay. I could see both of them being exhausted time after time because they don't communicate well and have awful defense mechanisms. I could also see Jungkook stuck in there bc he loved Belle when he was young and he loves to provide and he's like a puppy you know? Like he did her wrong in the past and now he's trying his best to make it right, kind of redemption? Blindsinded maybe, not true love. And Belle stuck in there bc she likes Jungkook, sure, but it's safer for the kids and she'll do anything to keep them safe and Jungkook does just that? Not that she would force herself into it but you know. Yeah. Just my thoughts, love you! ♡

This was really sad to me to read because it seems like such a fatalistic view of marriage and relationships. People just aren't perfect, and marriage puts someone right there in the mud with you when you going through shitty phases, but that doesn't mean it's not worth it. You don't have to be a perfect person to be loved or worthy of love. You can love someone at their worst, and I really don't see Isabella or Jungkook being at their worst now. In fact, the opposite, both of them actually feel safe and supported and accepted enough that they're starting to crack open pains and fears they have kept locked up --in some cases their whole lives!-- so that they can finally heal.

There's not really an "ending" in life until you die. There are always new challenges, new opportunities, new opportunities for growth. Does that mean that love and intimacy aren't worth it, that you shouldn't even try until you've reached some impossible place of perfection?

You also don't seem to think they're capable of growth but people are! Some things take years to heal or unlearn, sure, and I'll honestly be expediting some of that growth in the story compared to real life. Maybe that's just a difference in our view of people? I think that people can and do improve if the intent is there, and that intention to be better makes a huge difference. I see the ways Jungkook and Isabella have greatly improved in this story. Just because they aren't done yet doesn't negate all the progress they've made.

I've been married for almost eight years and we are still learning how to communicate, how to live together, how to support each other, and how to understand our own changing needs. Neither me nor my husband are perfect people, and we have had fight much bigger than any Isabella and Jungkook have had, but do I think our marriage isn't worth it? Nah. Even though sometimes we fight over the STUPIDEST fucking stuff. We have grown and changed as people, and it's sometimes been rough, but we've made it work so far. Isabella and Jungkook are just at the very beginning of their relationship and are rapidly learning so much about each other, and rapid growth can be painful, but they’re both invested. Why would that mean it's already time for quits? They haven't even gotten to fighting over fruit left on the counter or how to load the dishwasher or why would you ever NOT immediately clean up the bug you just squashed on the wall or why the fuck no one but me will put the empty toilet paper rolls in the bin THAT IS LITERALLY RIGHT THERE and they just line them up on the windowsill... like... wtf?!

You mention the fights as exhausting but you don't seem to be giving fair weight to the joy that they bring each other most of the time. If their relationship was nothing but fighting, that'd be one thing. You do make some good observations about their flaws and struggles! And I could absolutely have written a very tragic story of their marriage based on guilt and obligation and regret. I see so much love and admiration in their interactions though --playfulness and joy and gratitude. You don't see that too?

I guess this made me sad because it just seems like you are suggesting something should get thrown away because it's not perfect, when marriage is really learning about how to love and compromise on the imperfections.

[newmysterygirl]

No Warning Just Cute and Funny :)

Reader's P.O.V

Benito took Me,Jamal, Ruby and Cesar to get icecream because I wanted icecream. On the way back Jamal points out "A dog"

Ruby "Aw its lost"

I'm looking at it as we are driving past and it gets farther away.

"Stop the car."

Benito slows down and says "What you feel sick?"

"No. That puppy"

Benito rolls his eyes and keeps driving. So I do what any.... Crazy. Animal. Lover would do.

"Cesar scoot over to the middle for a second please"

Cesar does as I ask. I pull the lever to lift up the seat and open the door. The all yell my name but I'm already rolling. Out the car. Yes. I jumped out the car. I couldn't just leave the poor baby.

I knew Benito would throw me over his shoulder and put me back in the car so once I stop rolling I jump up and start running. I heard someone say shit. I'm assuming Benito and he probably got back in the car to stop me but I ain't leaving without the dog.

I get closer to the dog and see it's just a puppy and a beautiful one at that. I'm slowly walking towards it. I hear the car pull up behind me and them get out.

Ruby and Jamal run up next to me, holding my arms to stop me from getting closer to the dog.

Jamal says "You can't just walk up to it."

"Watch me" they pull me back

Ruby says "The dog could have rabies"

Cesar walks up and says "He called Oscar"

"Why"

He shrugs and I say "He should of just called my dad. He would understand. I get my Crazy Animal Love from my mom."

"PUPPY" I yell which makes Jamal and Ruby look at me like I'm crazy. Which I mean I am but they apparently haven't realized that.

The puppy stops, turns around and looks at us. Me and Cesar both say "Awe" We both crouched down putting our hands out. The puppy stares at each of us for a while then fully turns towards us which makes me smile.

It slowly starts walking towards us. Me and Cesar look at each other, smiling. When the puppy get to us it inches closer sniffling our palms. It finally let's Cesar pick it up after we sat there letting him warm up to us.

Benito finally walks up to us "I got off the phone with Spooky. He's gonna call your dad to meet us at the house"

"Ok. But we need to stop and get dog food and water first"

He stares at me like really. No.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

We got some dog food, water and 2 bowls. Benito is smoking while me and Cesar watch the pup eat and Jamal and Ruby..... I think they're talking about how stupid this is but oh well it's my decision and its already done.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Ruby,Jamal and Benito are in the front and me and Cesar are in the back with the pup.

Right now we are pulling up to Cesar's house and from 5 houses down I can already see the guys waiting. As we get closer I see my dad.

Benito shuts off the car and gets out. Jamal gets out then Ruby gets out, lifting the seat for me and Cesar to get out. "You hold him and then let him go when I call him. Okay?" Cesar nods and I get out after taking a deep breath.

My dad is the first to speak "What is this I hear about you jumpin out a moving car?"

"It was to help a puppy."

Oscar "The car was moving."

"Yes. I know. I was there. Very much so there actually." I roll my eyes then look back at my dad. Once I see he looks pissed I yell "Churro!" then give him an innocent smile. They look at me confused till the. We found out a Fox Red Lab. Jumps out the back of the car.

The guys either "awe" or say "wow" and bend down to let Churro smell them

Sadeyes "Boy or Girl"

"Boy" I say proudly

"We'll take care of him"

I look at Oscar confused. So he Continues "He'll live here."

"No the hell he won't. He's mine. I don't live here and he will live where I live."

"Well we can change where you live. No problem." Oscar says with a smirk

I roll my eyes and say "No Oscar.

I jumped out of a car for him."

Everyone laughs

Benito "Shit. Yeah she did." He looks at me and says "It was stupid as hell but" he bends down to pet Churro "We got this cute little bastard"

"He is NOT a bastard. A bastard is a kid who's parents aren't married"

Most of the Santos say "Really"

"Yes and" I bend down to pick up my Churro "that isn't the case for Churro because he has only ever had mommy" I say in a baby voice

Oscar clears his throat "I'm right here"

I look him up and down then say "Yeah. I see you."

Oscar rolls eyes and says "He's my son"

"No he's not"

"He's Santo property"

Me,Ruby and Jamal all gasp with a hand on our chest. Jamal covers one of Churro's ears before saying "He is NOT an object"

Cesar smirks and says "I thought you didn't like him"

"He's not that bad" Jamal say petting Churro's head

Ruby "Yeah and he makes The Princess happy"

They all look at me holding Churro like a baby and smile. Till Churro licks Jamal's face. Jamal backs away before saying "Okay. Now that. We're gonna have to talk about."

We all start dying of laughter. Once we all calm down my dad says

"Fine. You can keep the dog BUT you and Spooky have to discuss custody arrangements"

I look Spooky dead in the eye and say with a straight face "Take me to court bitch"

He raises a eyebrow while everyone laughs.

The End💙🐶

BTW

In This Carlos Is Her Dad⬇️

I know everyone has different names for him but this is who I pictured as Carlos ⬆️

[ladywinterwitch]

Run Away (Eight- What You Gotta Do)

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Avenger! Reader

Summary: You and Steve complete each other. Your love is that strong and devoted kind of love that pushes people to things like marriage, making a family. You couldn't imagine that a baby would be something you really wished, until the possibility wasn't your choice anymore.

Warnings:  A bit of angst, pregnancy talk, mentions of injuries, mentions of abandonement (mild), fluff, reader is still an emotional rollercoaster, cursing and swearing, smut, unprotected sex (too late for these two lmao), oral sex (f recieving), brief mentions of body insicurities, Bucky’s a puppy dog.

Words Count: 5289

A/n: Part eight! I can’t believe that I’ve actually come this far lmao. Plus, me posting stuff with less than 44827 years of distance with each other? A miracle. I always said that I would wrap it up at 10 chapters,but while writing this chapter I realized that I will need one or two extra chapters + the epilogue. We’ll see. For now I’m happy to be able to write lol. Series masterlist here, main masterlist here. Enjoy <3

ps: Chris’s look in that gif,,,chile 

                       (gif not mine)

In the following week you saw Steve once a day, just to assure that he was doing fine. He wasn' sleeping in your shared room for the moment, but in a spare bedroom. You knew that you were probably being harsh with him, but you were so mad. It wasn't the first time that he did something stupid to try and save others. Hell, just think about that damned plane crash that put him in the ice in the first place.

You understood the reasons why, and basically everyone tried to talk with you and kinda 'sugar coat it' but the issue wasn't that you didn't understand: the issue was that he couldn't afford to think only about himself. Was it selfish on your behalf to think that way? Maybe. But you couldn't help it. You told yourself that it would've been different if you were just married, or just lovers. His decisions would've still been his. But now it's different. In less than six months he would've become a father. And that comes with responsibility. Wasn't he the first to tell you how important it was for you to put aside your job, for months or maybe even forever, just for the wellbeing of the creature inside you? That kid is yours just as much as he's his.

You and Bucky went out for a shopping trip that afternon. You would've asked Wanda, but she and Vision went to Clint's farm for a few days to see him and his family. Steve still had to be inside the tower, since he wasn't fully healed yet. You knew that he was watching a football game with Sam now, while Tony and Bruce were working on a new project, and Thor went to Asgard for a while to go check that Loki and Odin weren't at each other's throats.

You didn't mind Bucky's company at all. And in any case it wasn't like you felt like going out with Steve, not just yet. The brunette drove you both to the mall where he parked and then you went inside.

-So, what absolutely exciting and girly shops I have to visit today?- he asked while you curled your hand around his bicep. You laughed, looking up at him while you walked.

-Well, this mama is getting bigger every day, so I really can't wear my old clothes. I wouldn't even fit in them, and I can't go on with you guys' hoodies and t-shirts. I mean, I'm still a woman. Who said I can't look good while pregnant?- you responded, dragging him to a maternity clothes shop. As soon as you entered like half of the women in the shop turned to look at Bucky. You glanced at him and saw that he blushed and was looking everywhere except them. You bit you lip to not smile while you started to look around at the clothes. You made sure to engage in conversations with him to try and take the attention away.

-Damn homie, I think you just made those women regret their partners.- you said lowly so only he could hear you, and being a super enhanced supersolier, he did hear you very clearly. He snapped his head towards you with a look of disbelief on his face. His expression was so funny that you couldn't help but laugh. He looked around quickly then got closer to you.

-Stop it! It's already embarassing without you pointing it out.- he whined with a low voice. You stopped laughing but you couldn't help but smile, pressing your lips together.

-It's just so funny to me, because I understand these women. Turns out that pregnancy doesn't only make you sick, but also terribly horny.- you rose an eyebrow and he face palmed himself. You laughed again.

-Too much information, doll.- he groaned. You chuckled, putting in his hands a bunch of clothes. He caught them with both arms and followed you like a puppy to the changing rooms.

-Thank you kind sir, now I'm gonna see if they fit then I promise we're out of here.- you joked, hanging the clothes into the changing room. You closed the tent and he let himself fall delicately on one of the couches. He looked around while he waited but it turned out to be a bad idea when he saw the women from the various isles and even the shop's staff looking at him. He awkwardly smiled and then looked back at the closed changing room, sinking in his seat and covering the side of his face with a hand nonchalantly. He heard a few muffled giggles but no ne bothered him.

-Y/n are you done?- he asked, more embarassed than anything. Suddenly she pulled back the tent and started to gather a few of the garments in her hand. Bucky's gaze got caught on her figure. It was essentially the first time that she wore something fitting and not exaggerately large, so her belly was fully on display, even more so since she was turned to the side. The man felt a mix of emotions all at once and didn't quite catch the first time she called him.

-Buck, did you hear me?- he snapped out of it and stood to his feet, blinking a few times.

-It looks great.- he commented. You had on a nice flowery minidress, the sleeves were short and puffy, the square neckline showed just enough cleavage to remain classy, the breast area was tight but just below the skirt was soft and fell perfectly on your figure, showing the belly. You looked at him with a smile, chuckling slightly.

-Yeah, it fits well doesn't it? I'm getting these,- he gave a three dresses, two shirts, two t-shirts, two pairs of jeans and a pencil skirt to him, while she had other stuff in her own hands. -And I'm leaving these.- she sighed.

-Would you do me a favor? I'm dropping these off, meanwhile could you go to the pay desk? I'll be there in a sec.- he nodded and you thanked him while you walked away to the isles. Bucky walked towards the counter and dropped the garments on the desk, giving a quick smile to the girl behind it. He pulled out from the back pocket of his jeans the wallet and then the credit card, which was obviously Tony's, and put it on the glass above the counter. He waited a few seconds until the clerk, which was a nice girl with black hair and amber like eyes, spoke to him.

-So, how far are you guys?- she asked. Bucky almost choked on air at that phrase.

-Oh we- - he was about to say, but you arrived at his side and saved the situation. You smiled kindly at the girl and gave a pat on Bucky's arm.

-I'll be exactly of five months in a week, and he's more like the uncle than the father.- she tileted her head towards the brunette. The clerk smirked.

-Is he now?- she said rethorically. Then added, -That would be 277$. You're paying with cash or card?- Bucky gave her the Visa and she thanked him, finishing the payment. Y/n glanced at him with a knowing look and a slight smirk. He rolled his eyes and shook his head a little, she furrowed her brows as if to ask 'Why?' and he just mouthed 'No', so she didn't push. For now.

-Thank you for your purchase, congratulations and we hope to see you soon.- the girl said with courtesy, her gaze lingering a bit on the man, whom didn't return the look. You could see the slight disppointment of the girl.

-Thank you, have a nice day.- you saluted her and then headed out with Bucky. An hour had already passed and you still had in mind to buy a few things, but first you needed a break.

-I desperately want a piece of cake. What do you think?- you elbowed him delicately to catch his attention. He turned his head and nodded, still carrying the two bags. You arrived at the mall's cafe and ordered. He picked an iced coffe and you a slice of cheesecake and some tea, knowing that coffe wasn't that good for pregnancy. You took a seat at one of the tables outside, even tho you were still technically inside the mall.

-So, wanna tell me why you didn't accept the clear as the sun advances that the pretty shop assistant did?- you brought the fork to your mouth. He huffed and shrugged.

-Because I am not interested. I don't think I'm in the right mindspace to date right now.- he responded. You exhaled, tilting your head slightly to the side.

-Buck, I know that it didn't end up that smoothly with Nat, but she's gone.- she realized how that sounded like and quickly corrected herself, -I mean, not gone. But...gone, you know?- you cringed at your own words and he snorted.

-Very smooth y/n.- he joked, earning a glare from you.

-Shut up, I'm trying to help here. What I meant that while I understand that things with Nat didn't end up in the best of ways, she went away to give both of you the space you need to get back on your feet.- you paused, drinking a sip of tea, then offring the last bite of cake to him. He shook his head, giving you a lopsided smile.

-Don't worry, it's all yours.- you pointed your finger at him, while chewing the cheesecake. He chuckled.

-Right answer. Anyways, what I'm trying to say here, Buck, is that you have to allow yourself to try again. Because you deserve it. What do you tell me about that person you said you were interested in? I've never seen you with anyone in the last three months.- he looked to the side for a moment casually.

-They're taken so, yeah.- he simply answered, shrugging while taking a sip of coffe. You got sad all of a sudden. You eyebrows knotted in a sad expression and he noticed, giving you a small smile.

-Hey, don't do that. It's okay. I'm not like heartbroken or shit. I'm happy for her.- he assured you, -She.. well she has a family. She deserves it, so I'm happy for her.- he nodded, smiling softly. You smiled at him too, still with a hint of sadness. He took a nother sip of coffe an then raised an eyebrow, looking at you.

-Why are you crying?- he asked confused. You furruwed your brows in confusion and wiped your fingers under your eyes, realizing that a few tears had escaped. At that point without a reason, you started to feel worse and embarassed and a mess, so you sterted to actually sob a little. Bucky got up and moved his chair next to yours, hugging you.

-Hey what's wrong? I promise I'm alright.- he laughed to try and lighten the situation. You hiccupped into his chest.

-I- I know..it's just.. I don't know, these stupid hormones are making me act hysterical.- you had sittle sobs coming out every now and then. He kissed your head while he stroked your back.

-It's okay, you're not hysterical.- he chuckled softly making you smile. You pulled away from him looking in his eyes.

-I'm a mess aren't I?- Bucky wiped a little smudge of mascara under her eye, and then smiled at her lovingly.

-You look just fine, darling.- she hugged him, whispering a 'thank you, I love you' in his ear.

-I love you too- he answered.

After that, they finished their drink and Y/n told Bucky that she wanted to order a few things for the baby so they did just that. They went in a baby-stuff shop and she choose and placed some orders for a crib, a baby seat for both the car and the kitchen and the changing table. You didn't wanted to buy them right away, so you told the shop to bring them at the tower when they wanted.

When you exited the shop, it was already six thirty pm, so you decided to head back at the tower.

In the car, you told Bucky about your idea to get a midwife to help you during your pregnancy and especially when it'll be time to deliver the baby.

-I don't know y/n... I mean I think that you don't need a midwife or some other stranger to take care of you and the baby. You have Steve. You have me, and Sam, Wanda and the rest of the team. Bruce has basically become a doctor of everything, I'm sure that helping to deliver a child isn't that hard.- he shrugged while keeping his eyes on the road.

-I can't and wouldn't expect you all to babaysit me for another four months, Bucky. You have missions, classes, a you know, your own lives.- he glared at you, probably wanting to intervene and contraddict you, but he remained quiet in the end.

-And, you really can't expect Bruce to handle this. He's a fucking physician for God's sake. He's absolutely amazing, but a delivery? No, that would be too much even for him. And I would be kinda embarassed, for crying out loud.- you added with a high pitched voice. You absentmindely started to cradle your belly. He thought about it for a few seconds.

-I don't know y/n, you know how I am with strangers. But in any case it's your and Steve's decision. Please, talk to him. He's been miserable this week without you. He wouldn't shut up about how he was sorry, and stupid and in love with you and that he misses your smile, your belly and I don't know, I stopped listening after a while.- he said exasperatedly. You suppressed a smile.

-Really? - you asked sheepishly. He turned his head to look at you for a second before smiling knowingly.

-You know it's true. Your fucking married, for God's sake.- he said, tired of you two being idiots. He could just imagine how it'll be when you'll become parents. You will be great at it, but also a mess at the same time.

-Hey, Whiny Soldier, how was shopping? - Sam shouted when he saw the two of you coming in the room with your hands full of bags. You didn't see him, but you just knew that he pursed his lips and shook his head.

-

You came back at the tower just in time for dinner. Vision and Wanda had aprons tied on their chests, while the others were just chilling in the common room. Steve was there too, beside Bruce.

-Shopping was productive, thank you very much.- you answered pointing for Bucky to put down the bags.

-Let me help you take these to your room.- he offered, but you gave him a look and he understood immediately, putting them down. You smiled and kissed his cheek.

-Thank you for being my human cart today.- his jaw dropped, pretending to be offended.

-Oooh- Sam howled and the others laughed. Steve smiled slightly, still mortified by your little 'cold shoulder week'  thing.

-You're lucky I can't tickle you to death right now.- he pointed his finger at you before walking to the fridge to pour himself a glass of water.

-Yeah, yeah, like you say big guy.- you teased him. You paused, shifting your gaze to Steve. He was wearing a blue hoodie and gray sweatpants, his dirty blonde hair were starting to get a bit long at the sides and a few strands fell on his forehead, while his jaw was covered with a slight scruff. His puppy dog eyes met yours and you couln't help but melt a little.

-Steve, are you well enough to help me with these?- you asked and even before you could finish he was on his feet. He almost tripped from how fast he tried to reach you.

-Yes I'm perfectly well I mean I'd love to help you. I mean obv- - you raised an eyebrow and he stopped, looking down. The whole team was watching in silence like it was a damn movie.

-I'm rambling, I'm sorry.- he said lowly. You sighed and places three of the four bags in his hands.

-C'mon. And you all, get a life.- you called them out while you two walked to the elevator. A few minutes later, after the short, silent, trip, you arrived to your room. He placed the bags on the bed and you did the same after closing the door behind you.

-Help me take off the price tags.- you invited him. He grabbed the bag, taking out the first garment. It was a white baby onesie, with Captain America's shield logo on it in white, blue, and red. His breath got caught in his throat and he suddenly let out a sob.

You snapped your head up in confusion, your features softening when you saw him. He sat on the bed, head down, onesie still in his hand. You put down the dress you had in your hands and went to sit next to him, since it would've been really uncomfortable for you to bend on your legs now. You hand went istinctively to rub his back.

-Can we talk?- he asks with broken voice. You tilt your head to the side to look at him with the shadow of a smile on your face.

-Only if you stop crying. Or else none of us will be able to talk at all.- he chuckles slightly making you smile lovingly. He wraps his big arms around you, nuzzling his face in your neck, your collarbones exposed due to the large shirt you were wearing. The wave of relief that washed over you in that moment was hard to describe.

-I missed you so much, baby. I couldn't stand the thought of you being mad at me. I'm sorry for being so impulsive.- he sniffed while he talked. You nodded, cupping his face gently. Steve melted into your touch.

-I know you are. And I'm sorry too. I know that I've been harsh with you these past days, it's just...- he waited patiently, -You're not responsable for only yourself anymore. I understand, please trust me, I understand what you wanted to do and also that you feel like it's your duty to do that. And it kinda is, but my point is- you shook your head realizing that you weren't really explaining yourself.

-What I mean is that you cannot put your life behind other's. Not for me, not even for the team. We're grown ass adults okay? Fow how much you can love us and we can love you, we are our own person. But this- you placed his hand on your belly, -This had been a choice. Your, mine. We both are responsable for this life. The same way I gave up my job, and the lessons. Now, I'm not asking you to stop going on missions, but I'd like you to be with me as much as possible. And that when you go, you'll be careful. Please, Steve.- you say softly, almost in the verge of tears. Again. You've cried more in five months than in your whole life probably.

-You're right. It was pretty hypocritical of me to get mad at you for the same reason in the first place.- he shook his head in disappointment. You rolled your eyes, adding -Work. I think we'll have to rearrange ourselves in this department.- you smiled and he laughed, agreeing.

-So, are we gonna get these off the bed and use the space in a better way or what?- your lips curled in a seductive smirk that quite shocked him. He recovered quickly, jumping on his feet and placing the bags on the ground in a split second. You threw you head back laughing at his eagerness, but you honestly couldn't blame him. Your hormones were a mess and your horniness at level 100, but you often were either sick, tired, hungry or he was. And not to mention the missions that separated you. So let's say that since you got pregnant the sex decreased noticeably, which was something that you wanted to fix. You phisically missed and needed him.

He returned to you and crashed his lips to yours, and soon enough you were a mess of tongues and lip bites and sucks that got interrupeted just briefly to get your clothes off. He didn't have anything under his hoodie, and you happily noticed that he was completely healed and that his weeks in the tower were due to the lack of new missions. You sincerely hoped it would last. After his hoodie, his pants and boxers were next. With you the situation was a bit more complex: first the light material shirt you had on had to be unbuttoned, then your tank top, the jeans' belt and the pants themselves. When you were left in just your underwear, a plain set of cotton white bra and panties, Steve stopped to look at your body.

He was in awe of you. He rose his hand and started a caress that began on your cheek, his thumb on your bottom lip, then descended to your now fuller breasts, to the curve of your waist to to your baby bump. At that point he bent down on his knees and kissed it softly.

-Hey little one, if you want to take a nap, now it would be a good time.- he whispered directly to the stretched skin. You let out a sound that was halfway between of a whine and a laugh.

-Steve, Jesus Christ.- you covered your face with your hands. You heard him laugh and stand on his feet again. He removed your hands gently, kissing you again with slow, agonizing passion that even let escape a ridiculous whine from your lips at the loss.

-Where were we?- he reached behind your back and unclasped the bra, sliding it off your shoulders and freeing your breasts.

-Mrs and Mr. Rogers I'm sorry to disturb, miss Maximoff would like me to inform you that dinner's ready.- you stopped hearing F.R.I.D.A.Y.'s voice. You groaned, annoyed at the interruption, but Steve suddenly started to push you on the bed and to lick and suck your boobs.

-Tell miss Maximoff that we have dinner here.- he responded biting softly your nipple, making you whimper.

-It will be done, mr Rogers.-

-Geez Steve, couldn't you be more specific?- you sassed with a deep breath, distracted by your husband's mouth. He snorted moving further down to remove your panties.

-You're already pregnant, couldn't be more obvious than that.- you started to laugh, but it soon became a loud moan when you felt his tongue licking a long stripe on your pussy. You closed your eyes and istinctively wanted to bring your hand in his hair, but you found an obstacle. A medium big, round and naked obstacle. You huffed and Steve stopped, tilting his head to the side, since now you couldn't even see him from between your legs.

-Are you okay?- he asked, worry in his voice. You sat on the bed, helping yourself with your hands. He returned beside you, waiting.

-It's just..ugh I'm so awkward and big and not confident if I have to be honest.- you say for the first time out loud. You wanted to cover yourself by curling your knees to you chest, but again, you swollen stomach didn't allow it. At that point you got even more frustrated.

-Damn it.- Steve places his fingers under your chin and made you look at him. His eyes were serious but not mad.

-Hey, none of that. Do you even realize the miracle your beautiful body is doing? You're creating a whole life in there, baby.- he smiled brightly looking in your eyes, -And by the way, you're still hot as fuck.- that made you laugh. He kept smiling while he made you lay down again on the sheets.

-This beautiful face..these cheeks are even sweeter now.- he peppered them with kisses making you giggle uncontrollably.

-Don't get me started on these ones...- his hands cupped your breasts while his mouth attacked your nipples and the soft skin. You moaned softly, your hand immediately in his short hair, your nails delicately scratching his scalp.

-But you know my most favorite thing?- he kept going, -This.- he was now between your legs, kneeled in front of your stomach. He caressed it and kissed it a few times. Then his gaze  locked in yours again. You almost felt hypnotized, both by his velvety voice and his touch.

-I love it because it's round and soft and most importantly because it's giving me a family. A baby. And you know who's giving me all of this? You are. So don't ever be insecure about this wonderful body, please.- you smiled at him softly. Soon enough the mood changed again when he spoke his next words.

-Now, are you gonna let me thank this stunning body like it deserves or not?- you felt the smirk in his voice, his blue eyes hungry. You mirrored his expression propping yourself up on your elbows.

-Would like to see it.- you answer. He huffs out a laugh and reprises what he started doing a few minutes prior. He took good care of you until you came on his tongue, and at that point you grabbed him to crash your lips together. You kept moving and bringing him with you, until he found himself laying down on his back and you straddling his hips. Steve's hands immediately went to your sides, trying to not move and let you do the work, even though all he wanted was to fuck you until you both could't anymore.

You kept you eyes on his while you stroked him a few times before slowly sinking on him. He squeezed both his eyes shut and your hips, huffing a long breath. That could've almost made you laugh if you weren't just as wrecked. Your hips started moving, back and forth, to the sides in painfully slow circular motions. At one point he grabbed your ass, sitting up and making you gasp.

-Doll I'm kinda struggling here- he breathed out kissing your neck while you kept moving. -I want to be delicate but damn.- he nipped at your sweet spot between your neck and shoulder. Your hips started going faster with the help of his hands guiding you and soon enough you were panting and kissing each other passionately and messily.

-Oh, Steve I'm almost there- you moan hugging his head to your chest. He moaned too, reaching in front of you with his hand to circle your clit.

-I'm right behind you baby.- he reassured you while in reality he was trying hard not to come in that exact moment. He craved you more than usual, not only beacause your body was actually so fucking hot to him but also because he hasn't touched you for almost two whole weeks.

Just a few seconds later you gripped his shoulders, hiding your face in his neck. His breath got caught in his troath at the way you clenched around him when you came. And as a cue, he followed you short after, coming inside you. You stayed like that, hugging and cuddling for some minutes, then he kissed you and moved you gently on his side, hissing slightly when you lost contact.

-Be right back.- he said going to the bathroom and returning with a wet wash cloth. He cleaned you up from both of your releases and then went back to throw the dirty fabric in the laundry basket. You looked at him with a lopsided smile, still hazy and quite tired from the recent activity. He mirrored your expression with messy hair, crawling in the bed to you and pulling you on his side after.

-I needed that.- you say. He sighed, -I definetly did too. How come we always end up having sex after we argue or talk?- he asked casually. You shrugged.

-I don't know, the important thing is that the talk comes first and then, the sex.- he agreed with a nod. You chewed on you lip a bit before speaking again.

-Honey- you called, he hummed.

-While you were away last week I started to think about how I will probably need more help in the future, you know. And the fact that you and the others are often away on missions. And I mean it's totally alright, that's work but... I felt so bad when Sam and Wanda were left behind last time. And just to 'babysit' me.- he looked down at you with a frown.

-They offered to stay behind because they wanted to. We're taking turns on missions all the time.- he responded. You barely noticed that he had started to caress your belly.

-That's not the point, you know it. The last mission was quite big. I know my work well enough to know that Fury would've sent all the team, if I weren't left behind. Also by now we both understood that this baby isn't a normal baby and that is why I'm so sick so often. Bruce can't be here all the time, and for how good and skilled he his, he's not an expert in the baby field.- he was listening to you intently, but he wasn't quite sure with where you wanted to go with this.

-What's the point?- he asked, moving a strand of your hair from your face with his fingers.

-The point is,  that I've read a lot in these months, and I think that we should hire a midwife. It would be someone that stays with me most of the day and helps me. An actual expert.-

-And how would you explain that our child has the blood of two super soldiers?- his hand motioned himself and you. You got up, towards the bathroom.

-Steve, we share the house with a god, a giant green monster, enhanced people, a witch, a kid that has the powers of a spider and an intelligent robot. I think it wouldn't be a great surprise.- you closed the door, peed and then refreshed yourself before going back to take some clean clothes. You saw that he was waiting for you to get out, probably wanting to shower.

-Okay then, I guess we can arrange that, if that will make you feel better.- he finally spoke. You kissed his cheek, already in your underwear.

-Thank you. You're showering?- he nods, the raises an eyebrow.

-Wanna join?- you laugh and shake your head.

-No, baby not now. I get tired quite easily and if the bed's already a bit difficult to work with, the shower must be a nightmare.- he pouted.

-You're right.-

-But- he stops the door before it closes, waiting for you to continue. -I want to fix your hair and your beard if you let me.- a lopsided smile opens on his face.

-Be my guest.-

-

After you sat him down on the edge of the bathtub, you shortened the longer strands on top with tiny scissors. After that you picked up the electric razor and groomed the sides, shortneing them but not removing them completely. You did the same with the beard, leaving a short, barely visible scruff. About twenty minutes later you were done. You put down the razor and took a step back to look at your work.

-Perfect.- you commented, brushing the hair that fell on his chest and shoulders. He stood up and looked at himself in the mirror, smiling.

-Is there anything you can't do?- he asked. You smirked, kissing him before starting to clean up.

-No, I'm a woman.-

*************

Tag list: @polarcrystall​    @a--1--1--3​    @silver-winter-wolf​   @jessyballet​

[inessencedevided]

The Untamed, episode 18 - watching notes

I know I'm slagging a bit. So sorry, life in quarantine is - somehow - busy. I want to watch the untamed all the time, but I just can't right now :/

Last on "Sophie wstches the untamed": Wei Wuxian is a self-sacrificing idiot but what else is new

Wei Wuxian, third young master, just used his cultivation power to catch a chicken

And icon

And now she's his hunting companion. I fully support them :Dh no, one of the wangxian mirror is hurt 🥺

But I'm glad he's back. I've been anxious to find out what will happen to them

Completely random, but I've just realized that apparently "Shifu" (please pardon my spelling) is Chinese for "Master". I knew the word from avatar the last airbender, but never knew that its chinese 🙈 (I realised this because Song Lan is repeatedly calling "Shifu!")

There is just something incredibly disturbing about people crying tears of blood

So wait, Xue Yang blinded him with some kind of poisonous powder?

Ooohhhh! I never realised that this legendary Master of wwx's mother and Xao Xingchen is a woman? (Or I did and forgot again)

(Sorry. The fact that there is such a disparity between the number of male and female significant characters on this show is maybe the only thing that's bothering me right now. I've seen worse on other shows though and the female characters that are there are great, so I'm not that bothered by it.)

Wen Qing is as much of a fangirl of the Baoshen Wanderer as I'd be :D

OMG they're going to look for her!!! Pleasepleaseplease let them find her! 😭

Also, the way wwx's whole face softens at the mention of some link to his parents 😢

Those needles going like 5 centimetres into Jiang Cheng's skull ... *shudders*

Turning serious for a second: I know Jiang Cheng is grieving right now, but even so, the fact that he can only see worth in either his live or his death if he is able to seek revenge is ... depressing. It says a lot about his source of self-worth, as well as how much he depends on some form of outside validation. Poor guy :(

Not done with my feminist bullshit yet: I don't quite know in what way it is significant, but I love the fact that in a setting where power is largely transfered from father to son or from (mostly) male masters to a largely male student body, our protagonist's powerful ancestors and grandmaster where women. His mother was a powerful cultivator, his father the servant. And his mother also learned from a female cultivator who seems to have acquired almost legendary status within this world. I can't help but think that this exemption to the rule is somehow linked to who Wwx is as a character. He's a trickster. He defies customs left and right and even though I don't know how yet, he will somehow go against the other clans in such a major way that his own sworn brother will find it justified to kill him. But he's still the protagonist. We're meant to root for him. I can't help but hope that in a setting so defined by rigid customs and traditions, including a patriarchal structure, this story will promote that those customs shouldn't simply be upheld for their own sake, that when they defy what is morally right, one should break and reform them. (Maybe I'm going too far with my analysis here, but that is both a feminist message and a very anti-authorotarian stance, the second of which is one hell of a statement in modern day china)

Why do I have a feeling that Wei Wuxian is promising too much? It would be way too easy if this worked :/

Jiang Cheng held his chopsticks the wrong way round 😭🥺

Jiang Cheng: "Tastes terrible"

Also Jiang Cheng:

I live for Wen Qing's silent disapproval

Wei Wuxian ...

He's still going to sacrifice his own golden core, right?

And he's not telling Jiang Cheng...

This is going to be one of those shows again where 90% of the conflict could have been avoided if people had just GODDAMN TALKED TO EACH OTHER, isn't it?

Why do I keep doing this to myself?

The way wwx and Shijie are remembering the home they have lost through food is so relatable, it breaks my heart 💔😔

AAaaawwwwww, oh my god!!!!

Little Wei Ying!!!! 😭😭😭

I did not expect this flashback but it makes me so happy!

I mean look at him!!!!

(Sorry for the shitty pic of my laptop screen but LOOK AT HIM! 🥺)

Shijie! 😍

To be fair to little Jiang Cheng, a kid that she wouldn't understand why he suddenly can't have puppies anymore

My heart ... 💚💚💚

Shijie has just always been there for both of them and holding them together. I can't 😭

Also little Jiang Cheng's "I'm sorry"! He just wants to be loved. Then and now :'(

I don't know, I'm just weak for characters that bear their inner child's pain into adulthood ...

Can you not give me wwx / jc brotherhood feels when I know for a fact where this leads??? 😭😭😭

"You me and Cheng, the three of us, we must be together forever and never ..." "never be parted." - *they immediately part ways*

I CAME HERE THINKING I'D GET MY HEART RIPPED OUT BY TWO GAY IDIOTS NOT BY A TRAGICALLY DOOMED FAMILY! THAT'S GODDAMN FALSE ADVERTISING!

sorry

don't lie to them you idiot!!!

We'll see song lan again, won't we? Cause I still don't understand what exactly happened to him and why

Also, I want to know what he originally wanted them to tell Xiao Xingchen 🧐

"None of them cherishes his own life." Wen Qing knows my pain

That was a hard cut to a battle montage ...

LAN WANGJI!!! 😍😍😍 I've missed you so much!

I'm still about confused about wwx's plan here

Not the goal, just the execution

That mountain shot with the bells is awesome!

Okay, I'm not quite sure what's happening here. This person might be the true Baoshen Wanderer. But I don't think so. I think it's more likely she is either Wen Ning or Wei Wuxian in disguise (I'm sure they could also alter their voice) and Wei Wuxian has not given up his plan to exchange his core for Jiang Cheng's

Either way it's just unfair that this is where the episode ends 😅

@sweetlittlevampire @fandom-glazed @elenirlachlagos @allhailthedramallama @luckymoony (hope you guys are doing okay 💚)

[mons1erprom]

Childhood Friends to Lovers for Scott and Amira? How did they meet as kids? Also the development of their friendship to realizing they're fully enamored with each other? Am a sucker for this trope no lie!!

Mod Angie - it’s 1:39am but Jesus punch me with inspiration, I have to apologize

I’ll do Scott now and do Amira next time hon

Scott:

How you met:

(13 years before (since he’s 21 he was 8 for those who have trouble with math))

Scott was with his grandma and WPL (Wolfpackleader) Outside walking and playing tag, When he saw that the neighbors finally sold their house. His grandma smiled at him

“Ah so they really sold it after all those years...”

They watched from afar as a car slowly rolled before the garage, two adults opened the doors cheerfully chatting

“Who are they?” Scott looked up on his grandma who just smiled calmly at him, “the new neighbors, I heard they also have a kid about the same age as you two”. Scott tried to see the little kid “they do?” Granny just nodded walking slowly back to their house, “yes perhaps a new friend, Scotty” after hearing the world friend Scott perked up his ears smiling widely trying to look harder for the little child “ A FRIEND!” He exclaimed jumping up and down, after a while he noticed that granny and wpl left him a bit behind and he ran to catch them up just thinking about ways of introducing himself to his new potential friend.

The next day he decided he will train himself in the park with wpl as emotional support. “hi! I’m Scotty! I’m your new friend!!!” He said talking to the tree.

“that’s too hard you’ll just scare them away” said wpl behind him building a sand castle

“you’re right,.... hi! I’m Scotty I’ll be your new friend!” He said again with just as much excitement.

“Almost there buddy” wpl said not turning away from his masterpiece.

Scott embraced himself and almost screaming he said “HI! My NAME IS SCOTTY! LETS BE FRIENDS!” a little voice from behind him said “okay, let’s”

with that Scott jumped a bit seeing a kid standing behind him, I mean she looked like a kid, she was smiling holding her hand out “oh sorry were you trying to make friends with the tree there?” Scott only could shake his head saying no

“woah he really is quiet! How did you DO that!!!? WhoAREyou??” Wpl jumped up from his richly made castle and ran to the two small child.

“Me? I’m (y/n)! We just packed out in the neighbor! Who are you?” “Wpl! And that’s Scott he was really eager to meet you!” He slightly showed Scott closer to the little girl

“well im pleased to meet you Scotty! I’m (y/n) so wanna be friends?” Again Scott could only nod furiously while smiling brightly

This was the first but not the last time he was speechless.

After that these three were inseparable. They did many countless of mischief together mostly on each other. But only harmless tricks like putting ice in each other’s shirt.

How their relationship grew:

As kids:

Learning things together like what is kissing, it started with a peck on the cheek then Scott started holding her hand telling everybody she’s his husband now, not understanding marriage.

Making tea parties with wpl. Running and playing tag a lot. Also daring each other to do stupid things “EAT A WAGON OF PICLE” “BRUSH YOUR TEETH USING YOUR LEG” “SWITCH CLOTHES WITH (Y/N)”

As teens:

Re creating kisses from the tv but not putting feelings in them just doing that because they were curious

Leaning on the “being pure and curious” a bit more like “why are you not like me? You run like me you make jokes like me but you don’t look like me?”

Stupid innuendos with granny or wpl oppening on them when they switched clothes or when he put on a bra and got scared when he couldn’t take it off

Realizing they love each other:

It happened somewhere in school when Scott noticed her cheering from him with the others, he noticed he doesn’t think of her as “only a best friend” anymore but maybe more than that too. He really wanted to Score for her and oh boy did he score big this time, running for her, picking her up, tossing her into the air, just so excited. “IT WAS FOR YOU (y/n) !!! You mean the most to me!”just a sweet love sick puppy that’s what he was like after that realization of his. It drove everybody(mostly wpl) insane. He always ran after her smiling whenever he accomplished something “I GOT A B! A B!!!” Just to see her cheering for him and praise him how much a good and clever boy he really is. He wanted to do better everyday. He made rap songs for her feat. Polly. Telling all about how much he loves her. And after that he made sure she understands everything he says is real so he carefully made a little speech (with wpl and Liam’s help) telling everything he loves and adores about her

After that they got Together and everybody was so happy for them. They made the school a better place with their goofiness.

Epilogue:

Of course Scott asked for her hand quiet fast and she said yes of course. But decided they will only marry after at least one of them finds a job, this was Scott when he decided to be the gym teacher in the school they both went.

They brought a house somewhere in the close neighbor where they all grew up.

In the wedding they invited every one of their friends.

Yes everybody cried. It was beautiful and with full of true real emotions. Wpl was the best man ofc.

The honey moon was also full of love and happiness. They went to Disneyland.

After few years (not that few) (a bit early perhaps) (it was after a year) their first child got born and neither of them could have been happier.

Scott is the dad everybody wanted as a child . Reliable, funny, loving, and always ready to have some quality time with his offsprings.

They had 3 kids after 10years in marriage. Just a big happy family with wpl as the best uncle.

Play dates in the park.

Scott couldn’t wait till they could finally catch a ball. So he could train them and play with them.