#but i dont know if i have the energy to give a lot of. energy. ?? to expect it back? but its like
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teaboot · 2 days ago
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Sometimes I think a lot about my mom's cat
My mom's cat is a common domestic shorthair we found on the side of the road as a kitten
Regular cat, not a maine coon or one of those massive breeds. His mom was smaller than a loaf of bread
But in a sort of a Clifford The Big Red Dog situation, he grew super fast, and really really big, and took a super long time to stop growing
Worried that she was overfeeding him, she eased back his portions, but he stayed a massive round baby
When he started having kidney problems, she took him to the vet.
The vet took a look at him and said, "holy fuck, what are you feeding him", checked the nutritional listings on his chow, and told her "Yeah, maybe he's reacting badly to the amount of grain in this, try a meatier diet"
So my mom wound up special-ordering this specific high-protein prescription cat food made of like. Kangaroo meat or some shit that cost like sixty bucks a bag
And, as typical act two in an episode of House, he somehow got worse on the fancy specialized stuff that was supposed to be Primo Athlete Olympic Feline Blend
Like. WAY worse. His guts were inflamed and his kidneys were shutting down and he was all sore and HE WAS STILL HUGE, just miserable and sad
So shetook him back to the vet, where they had to help him pee (he was apparently close to bursting and had some kind of blockage too) and went "Yeah no this is NOT normal and we don't know what's going on, we're gonna do some tests but in the meantime you should go back to what he was eating before, at least that wasn't actively killing him" so she did
And he still wasn't great, but he also improved
And so they take his blood and do an ultrasound and a couple g's later she gets a call back like "this is gonna sound crazy, but we want you to put him on a low-meat diet. Just the least amount of protein and iron and shit. We need you to find the grainiest, filler-iest dollar tree kibble available and give him some of that bad bad shit"
And my mother is a woman of science. So she did
And he GOT BETTER
His energy picked back up, inflammation went down, he started drinking normally again, got back to pissing like a fuckin champion
And so it turns out that out of all the random ass freeway bonus cats we possibly could have scooped out of a ditch, WE got the one-in-a-million freak of nature with a SPECIFIC genetic defect that means a paleo protein free range diet is essentially poison and he THRIVES on cheap ass garbage
Like. He medically NEEDS junk food
I dont really understand how that works, but i cant argue with results.
If we had four of him, they'd outweigh my mom. And he's FINE
Also blind, but that's unrelated
Im not using him as a symbol or a metaphor or anything. I just keep catching myself thinking about my mom's Big Fucking Cat
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oceandelreysworld · 3 days ago
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Loving injuries
Vi x injured reader - pt 1.
(Fluff, tension, blood-kinda-, making out)
This is my first story, so uhh, lmk what I need to improve on or if it's good or not!
Made this a little different from the show like:
After Vi "died." Everyone went their separate ways, some better than others.
Ekko met Vi after she got out of jail, letting her stay with at the firelights hide out.
Ekko was like an older brother when you guys were little, but you haven't seen him in forever(he still has that brotherly act of protection and is still defensive over you)
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You and Vi were child hood friends and you had the biggest crush on her but then she "died". She was romeing the streets then she finds you against a building, sleeping....but she doesn't notice your hurt..
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"Y/n?" Vi shakes your shoulder to wake you. She moves you hood out of your face. "Oh my god, y/n!" You wake up and realize someone's talking to you and touching you.
"Get away, I'll hurt you." You say as you whisper, slowly grabing her wrist, using up all your energy. "Y/n it's me, Vi." You look up at her, letting go of her wrist, but you can't see her. Your visions all blurry.
"No, stop, get away from me!" You tilt your head up to try and look at her better. "Y/n..I'm right here."
She squats to your level. She's strokes her thumb on your cheek. You wince at first, but then you look up to see the comfort of her light powder blue eyes and the pink shade of her hair.
You relax, your head into her palm, and start tearing up. Trying to use your arms to sit up but end up slowly leaning back down to the ground.
"I thought you died. What happened to you?...We needed you. I- I needed you." You muttered the last part in hope that she didn't hear you.
"I know... I'm so sorry. I got arrested... I'm sorry I left the way I did."
She gets down on her knees to hug you tightly when you whimper in pain. "Ow shit shit shit!" You shift your hand to hold tighter on the side of your stomach.
"What is it? What's wrong?"
You steadily move your hand and show her. There's a large blotch of blood seeping through your shirt.
"Y/n what the hell happened?! Who did this to you..?" She shifts her hand twords the injured area. "It's fine.. I'm fine. I've been like this for a few days."
She lifts your shirt up to see the wooned. You rapped that part of your stomach in bandages, but there's still a hole lot of blood on them. Vi slowly unrapped it while looking up at your eyes ever once a while.
She takes it all off, and she sees the huge wooned. It looked infected. Yellow coloring around the area and was still parshly still open and somewhat still bleeding. She could see where you tried stitching it up.
"Y/n, this looks really bad. How long have actually been like this?"
"I-...I've been here for a week. You sigh, knowing if you lied to her, that would make her even more worked up than she already is.
"I got stabbed almost two weeks ago.." You pause to take a breath. "I dont know who did it. All I know is I was trying to... okay, well, I was trying to steal some food... L-listen, I know it's bad, but I don't have any money, and I can't get up without the risk of it opening back up again.." she looks at you with her wide, worried eyes.
"Look, I know a place where you can rest, and I'm not giving you a choice. You're coming with me. Okay? And we'll figure out how to get you up." You admit defeat and relax your muscles against the wall again.
"..okay."
She raps you back up but puts the bandage on tighter so it doesn't rip.
"Okay, ready?" She holds your face, putting her forehead against yours. Getting back into a squatting position.
"No, but that's fine." She chuckles "Okay I'll pick you up slow. Don't worry about putting your weight on me. I can handle it, I've got you."
"Okay... thank you." You mumbled.
You rap your arms around her neck. She picks you up as slowly as possible. As she stands you up, you whine in pain, tucking your head into her neck. She tapes your thigh, letting you know she wants your legs up around her. She's holding you up by your thighs. You close your eyes, resting your head on her shoulder, loosening the rest of your body against hers.
"You okay, princess?"
You froze up. You haven't heard anybody call you that in a really...really long time. She would call you that when you guys were kids, it would annoy you back then, but now? It sounds so comforting coming from her, but in truth, you start to get flustered.
Your whole body heats up, and you hide your face back into her her neck so she doesn't see you blushing.
"I- um. Yeah. Yes. I mean, I'm okay."
She noticed your body tence up and the warmth of hers against yours.
"Okay..." She lifts her eyebrow side eyeing you with a smeark on her face. She didn't think you would react like this. She laughs lightly under her breath.
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You fell asleep while she walked the both of you through the sewers. She meets what seems like a dead end. She knocks a certain rhythm, allowing the door to slowly open.
As you slowly wake up, you're greeted by lots of lights. "Ahh." You shelled your eyes with your arm, trying to get used to the bright lights. "Well, good morning, sunshine." she laughs lightly.
"Hey...Vi?" Ekko says as he jogs up to Vi noticing you in her arms, not knowing it's you. Your breath chokes up hearing such a familiar yet unfamiliar voice.
"So uhh...you gunna introduce me?"
You turn your head slowly. Your eyes meet his, starting to tear up. Getting out of Vi's arms as quickly as you can, still having a hard time walking. You tried to walk to him, you lean for him almost falling if him and Vi didn't catch you. Your arms go around him as he goes around your neck.
You start sobbing immediately when he hugs back.
"I...I haven't seen- seen you in f-forever." It's hard for you to get a full sentence out, trying to catch your breath from crying as well from the pain on your side.
"H-how are you-...are you..are you real..?"
Hugging you tighter and placing his head on top of yours. Ekkos voice trying not to crack, but how could he not? You were like his little sister.
As you stay like that for a moment, he pulls away. Vi pulling you back so you can rest your weight on her chest. You stumbled a bit, but she held you with support.
His eyes widen, looking down at your stomach. "God! Your bleeding!" You lightly laugh it off, but you couldn't hold back your coughing. Sweat dripping from the side of your forehead. You grip your side tightly.
"Ekko, she needs to lay down. Now."
"I got it. Hey, we need backboard now!" Ekko yells waving his hand in a hurry.
"Guys, really, I'm fi..." Your sentence fades as you faint, leaning back on Vi, now all your weight is forced onto Vi front body.
"Shit shit now!" Vi yells, grabing under both your arms. Ekko quickly goes to you, grabing the back of your neck so you don't hurt it.
Vi, Ekko, and some of the firelights lift you onto the backboard. They lift you up, walking to the room where Vi has been staying.
Setting you down to put you on the bed slowly. Ekko asked the rest of them to leave. Vi was sitting beside the bed, keeping a close eye on your movements, while Ekko was leaning against the wall.
"Why didn't you tell me you knew where she was.." Ekko says with his head down, zoning out on the floor. "Ekko, I just found her not even two hours ago.. If I knew she was hurt.. hell, if I knew she was still alive, you think I wouldn't tell you?" Vi starts to raise her voice in defense twords him. Ekko was about to speak when they both noticed you turning your head.
"Hmm...? Oww shit." You bring your hands up to cover your face in pain, then to your side.
"Hey princess... how you feeling?" She brushes her hand along the side of your cheek. Your eyes look up at hers with such a soft glimpse.
"I'm- ow- I feel sick.." You cough a little more aggressively than early. To aggressive for Vi's comfort. She rests her hand on your head, feeling for your temp. "Cupcake, you're really hot. Drink some water." She says as she helps your head up, putting her hand on the back of your neck, and brings the cup to your mouth.
"I'm gunna go see if we have any more blankets and possibly some pillows, okay? I shouldn't be out too long." He looks past Vi, making it seem like he was only talking to you. You could feel the thickness of the tension in the room between the two.
"Okay, thank you." He walks up to you, smiling, giving you a peck on your head before walking out of the room, closing the door.
The blinds are shut, as well as the windows. It helps, but it scares you a bit to be in such an unfamiliar area. Vi can tell from your expressions that you feel uncomfortable.
"Baby, what is it? Is something the matter?" As you turn your head twords her, looking up at her, surprised at the pet name she called you. Vi gently cups your face, strokes of her thumb slowly makes your garde go down.
"Im...fine. I just don't feel good, and I'm a little... uncomfortable being here.."
"Yeah? Why is that?"
You stay silent for a moment, not knowing how to express your emotions.
"Is there anything I can do to help cupcake?" She looks at you with care in her eyes.
There she goes again. Those names... god, they sound so sweet coming from her. You can't believe you ever thought this was annoying.
You hold eye contact for a few minutes, maybe? It feels like it could be forever from how locked your eyes were set on each other.
"I.." You turn your head away, looking over, breaking eye contact. It was getting to be too much for you.
She gently turns you by your chin to look back at her. She looked at you with such soft eyes while her eyebrows frowned lightly.
"I'm okay Vi. I'll be alright, okay?"
"Okay.."
She leans twords you, resting her head against yours. As she picks her head up, she looks down at your bandages, ghosting her hand against it.
"Do you want me to restich this?"
"If you can, please...I don't want you to go out of your way, though."
"It'll never be out of my way if it's for you. Understand? When you need me, I'm there. When you call me, I'm there. Okay?" She spoke so softly yet firmly to get the point through you.
Her lips brush a slow kiss on your head.
Once she takes off the bandages fully, she takes out the old stitchs slowly, trying not to hurt you. Somewhat successful. She pulls out the alcohol. Your whole body tenses up, moving yourself over to the other side of the bed, scared of how bad it's gunna hurt.
Vi sets the bottle down and reaches for your hand, slowly trying not to scare you away. You let her hold your hand as her thumb strokes the back of your hand.
"Princess, it's badly infected, I need to clean it before it gets worse, I'll hold your hand all the way through. Please just...let me help."
You stay in the same spot in silence, hesitating to rest back on the bed, even though it hurts like hell.
"I have a feeling you're feeling this sick because it's infected." She brings your hand up to her lips, brushing kisses on the back of your hand, in hopes to comfort you. Each kiss makes you relax your body against the bed.
"Okay... just don't put it directly on it. Please."
"I wouldn't, I'll use uh... this."
She said as she looked around for cotton swabs. Finding some holding it up so you know what it is.
"Okay, just be gentle..?" You look at her with puppy eyes, not realizing what you were doing.
"Of course, princess, always." All Vi could think about is pulling your face close to hers to kiss you...
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Part two soon! Ik this is really long for my first one but I really like this plot ig😅
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moeblob · 7 months ago
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I'm on an OC kick and also super indecisive so I spun a wheel (thank you for choosing for me, RNG).
Ricardo is a body guard and is bffs with Marlo. Ricardo's current job is watching after a celebrity's daughter who the public doesn't know even exists. She's just a teenage girl vibing with her mom and getting texts and calls from her dad (who loves her a whole lot and keeps her out of the spotlight very purposefully) and has this bodyguard and his weird friend. Marlo is just vibing with his best friend.
(Also Marlo would absolutely laugh if he heard Ricardo say "someone called me eye candy and it wasn't you and now I think you should call me that")
#my characters#i have an ask in my inbox that has me obsessively thinking about drawing fanart#but i just dont have the energy for what i want to draw for it#its been a rough day guys im dying (allergies and lacking sleep)#(why are allergies so bad today i ask after shoving my face into a cat while knowing im allergic to cats)#there are some prices i will always suffer and pay in life and the cat allergy is one of them you cant keep me away from a cat#im shoving my face in their fur and you CANT STOP ME FROM IT and also they kept bothering me#anyway i got to bed at like 6am after a lot of zoomies and restless legs and then#woke up with both cats in the guest bed with me and man i will not know peace for a few days#worth it tho bc i love them and i will take suffering if it means cattention#i dont really have much to say about the ocs tbh theyre just buddies being guys and then theres a teenage girl sometimes#and people suspect ricardo is her dad and she cant really say no my dads (celebrity) since thats the entire point of rico#so she makes sure its not troublesome for him to have people assume things like that and hes just#idc im in love with my best friend and hes not giving me any kids so not like anyone will start drama if im not with your mom#but he is also ! friends with the celebrity and his wife so he does just go on Family Outings with the wife and daughter#and sometimes marlo because the wife knows of him and invites him sometimes but she treats#rico and marlo like sons instead which is a bit weird to the daughter but she likes her weird fake brothers slash dad and question mark#marlo dyes his hair pink if that matters and has been doing so for a v long time
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3-aem · 6 months ago
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Do you don’t mind if people steal your art? Because I have been seeing a lot recently, or do they need too give credit? By the way I love your art style I am just seeing it everywhere
i get a lot of asks about this and its not that i don’t mind (why i don’t respond very often) but that atm i don’t have the energy to fight this.
speaking from experience these things cost energy to track down and resolve, not to speak of how it’s upsetting to really contemplate the actions of the reposter.
im already upset about a lot of things constantly.
i want My work to do well and i suppose as long as my original stuff is getting plenty of attention I am fed. i have internal rules I follow for handling this. if the account is small i don’t bother. if they credited me via a direct at I don’t bother.
ideally people would credit me and i have also told people too in the past if they ask.
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little-red-fool · 1 year ago
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Brainworms but I was thinking about what if Raphael’s and Haarlep’s dynamic and relationship is something similar to an arranged marriage to fiends.
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sieglinde-freud · 4 months ago
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thinking about them and banging my head against the wall again whats new. they are making me so emo. god. what the fuck
#ann plays fates#theyre like all i can think about rn#its that time of the year#i mean i think about them both constantly separately but its always when september comes#do i get hit with the laslow/nyx rarepair brainrot i think#that just lasts through fall and winter#not that im complaining. i think eventually i will have posted the entire fucking conversation#i cant help it. each part gives me a segment of dialogue to be ill about#i have ‘but with burdens so heavy dont you think we can lean on eachother a bit?’ on my wall#ROMANCE. TO ME (girl who is aroace)#also underrated thing about them i like how nyx flirts back#its more prevalent in their A support but shes so fun with him even beyond the bonding over traumatic pasts#i think with laslow he does a lot of flirting right bc hes laslow but a lot of the time its like#no ones matching his energy#i was gonna say match his freak but i dont think he has any freak if im so real with u#if he does its buried beneath five metric tons of shame and embarrassment#and i like how his… laslow-ness kinda gives nyx space to let loose if that makes sense#like he can match her maturity because he. you know. all of that#but hes still young and so she can find a little bit of reprieve from it all in his attitude and blah blah blah#if that makes sense#they r just so perfect. TO ME#ive only ever written and posted one thing for them but i have like five million (like six) things in my drafts i need to get back#into writing. rarepair hell gotta feed myself#also that was like two years ago it kinda sucks a bit but thats fine its called growth#i just miss them. i dont really have the brainpower to play fates but i have enough to think about them#i mean i played a little but ive mostly just been doing dumb shit with the class system and not rly playing the game#we’ll get to it#im supposed to be sleeping
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huntershowl-moving · 4 months ago
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so i just belatedly realized the insane fucking implications of the power i gave seph in jjk-verse, ie raine finally learns how cursed energy actually works and sits back in her chair contemplating life choices
like no matter WHICH side they’re on. being able to siphon cursed energy from someone else and funnel it elsewhere (or absorb it herself) is pretty bonkers. especially combined with the heavenly pact that gave them So Goddamn Much cursed energy production. a functionally limitless amount of the stuff just pouring and pouring and pouring and pouring. no wonder it almost killed them. imagine what that could do in the context of bringing in curse users for interrogation (or outright killing them)?????
like weakening a special grade so bad they can just be fully cornered and captured??? granted that would potentially fuck her up pretty bad from too much at once but STILL, it's WILD — and omfg. being able to act as a battery for someone they're fighting with by splitting the ridiculous amt of cursed energy she produces between the two of them!!!! amplifying the power of someone who would normally be hopeless against xyz enemy!!! TF!!!!! even without the ability to use reverse cursed technique it is ABSOLUTE INSANITY and i love it because as Fucking Usual, she pays absolutely no attention to anything but her martial skills & isn't even slightly aware of what she can dooooo
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princessmyriad · 4 days ago
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#personal#thinking about how the phrase treat others how you want to be treated is actually incredibly one way#unless damn near every person ive ever met wants to be treated like shit which i cant imagine is true#like idk i spent a lot of my time giving my energy to people. and ill never feel bad for putting love and kindness out into the world#but i gave some of these people everything i had. or not everything that would diminish me but everything i could spare for them at the time#i treated them attentively and considerately and tenderly and lovingly#and that kindness has not been extended back to me by most of these people#some of them have surely in their own 'love language' and im grateful for these people in my life#but most of the people ive treated with intentional care have actively and on purpose caused me a lot of emotional harm#which again. im working through and like karma will get them without me needing to be there or whatever while i do my own healing#but regardless i still think some of that shit should not have happened like it did#i dont understand how everyone can say to me treat others how youd like to be treated but not tell me the caveat#that they will not treat me the way i want to be treated even if i put in that effort for them/for our friendship or relationship or whatevr#like idk im a bitch for asking you to leave me alone when ive been vomiting for two days straight but you can straightup sexually misconduct#with my body and then when i write poetry about it and share my feelings instead of leaving and taking that information anywhere helpful#you get to decode youre traumatized actually and im still a bitch for bringing it up?#make it make sense#'treat others the way you want to be treated' so youd like it if i starved you and verbally insulted and gaslight and manipulated you? no?#then what the fuck is the point of you saying that to me???#idk im just fucking pissed rn that. idk what im pissed at. cause again i know im no contact with all of these people now and their#shitty justice will find its way to them. and i cant be mad at myself for saddling with the wrong people cause some of that was my choices#and some of it was blood i couldnt escape for a long time. and i said i dont want to regret or resent#putting love out to the world#but i am still angry that so much of me was given to the wrong people. that these people just chose to completely ignore#the level of respect and patience and kindness i showed them#idk dudes im just angry. 'treat others the way you want to be treated' fuck off thats some quiet manipulation bullshit to get me to be#nicer to you even as you abuse the self-worth outta me fuck off fuck you#i found it again. you cant bury it im too full of love to not love myself too but it hurts how hard they tried for so long#'treat others the way you want to be treated' how bout no. how bout i treat everyone with a base level of kindness#and when youve shown me that you will treat me the way i deserve to be treated then ill fucking play niceys back
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shiratorizawa-academy · 1 month ago
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Hello shiratorizawa friend
I would take myself off anon but I fear I haven't posted enough about shiratorizawa recently and I would bring shame upon my ancestors...
Anyways, I'd like to present you with more ideas, such as: Semi having ADHD, Yamagata with a tooth gap, Shirabu having to tutor Ushijima in science despite the year gap, and Goshiki being insanely popular with first year girls and having no idea
(I have a lot of thoughts about the boys)
Fear not, friend, as I too have abandoned my boys for 3-4 years. The stz family is forgiving <3
Ok but hear me out. Yamagata definitely has ADHD too. He hyperfocuses on volleyball and that's where he gets rid of most of his excess energy. Then there's the corny jokes. The inability to stick to a hobby outside of volleyball. The constantly losing things even after the time skip. Listen. ADHD buddies.
Love the idea of stz study sessions with Shirabu as the leader who's valiantly trying to teach a bunch of idiots how to do science. It's absolute chaos. Semi and Yamagata aren't focusing. Tendou is just messing around. Reon is really really trying but everyone is so loud that he's practically forced to tune in to their conversations. Shirabu keeps snapping at everyone to be quiet, but it's not working. Ushijima is the only one who can actually focus through the noise but he's still not getting anything done because he's waiting for Shirabu who keeps getting distracted by the rest.
AND THEN GOSHIKI MY DEAR. LOVE THAT ONE. 10/10 NO FURTHER COMMENTS
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lemongogo · 2 years ago
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#HELPP ok i have thoughts.my thinking cap back on#LOVEE the ending as far as the actual direction goes yk.like people seeing (literally) the pain&plight of plants#and vowing to protect and look after them w utmost care#loved that knives technically survived the fall and the aftermath esp in recruiting someone to care for vash#BUTTT i dont know how i feel ab his death ;___; the symbolism w the apple tree and him using the last of his energy is sweet#and i dont think i would dislike it necessarily if we just had more time#to marinate in his story.i think... the ending does not give u a lot of time to reach the full conclusion#i think that theres a whole side to his story i WISHH nightow explored and i wish we had seen knives turmoil and vashs acceptance of his#experiences more than the select few scenes we got beforehand. its soo rushed T_T DONT GET ME WRONG im still more or less satisfied that#we didnt get an ending like.. oh everyones dead and miserable and vash killed knives and ppl never learn to coexist right#like it could actually be so thematically worse BUTT im just like. THATS ITTT??? THATS ALL..sitting here twiddling my thumbs#waiting for a complete resolution thatll never come to be.and it sucks bc i wish i could look towards stampede to get that neat wrap up#but stampede completely altered knives' story and fell into the nasty horrid pittrap of aligning him with reprehensible values#so no conclusion of theres will ever touch on max!knives' conclusion and i think that is the thing im looking 4 the most#no conclusion of theirs* sry LAWL#also read some posts (by trigum LUVV ur analyses btw i need to rb some now that i finished) that the max ending#doesnt give vash an ACTUAL ending. we reach the climax in his confrontation with legato and then his commitment to save knives#but anything beyond that just doesnt exist. MY GODD imagining a reality where we got like 5 more chapters at LEAST to#give it a hearty ending#anyways. the reporter bit is so cute im bummed they went straight to that in stamp :sob: best like... cute ending fr#trigun spoilers#trigun maximum#trigun#vash
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koishua · 8 months ago
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shining solo ep 8. my reaction rn 😐😐 took it a bit hard lmao
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#tp#very mixed feelings. as someone who associates herself with jeongwoo and having very similar personalities... this ep hurt a lot#idk idk#i mean i get it but i also absolutely do not get it#so many thoughts im taking this very personally what the heck#i cant really warm up to half of this part's girlies im sorry#i loved everyone on part one#as someone who also struggles with managing my social energy lvls... this was a slap in the face#bc my boy jeongwoo truly gave it his ALL the whole day and even managed to perform a couple songs for the girls#despite already having spent the whole day together#and his energy must have been SPENT already and then they pick him as MVP of the day and he has that 1:5 date with all of the girls#by himself!! which is so terrifying imagine being the one person who everyone's attention is on and you have to interact with these ppl#that you arent very comfortable with but you still try your best to give them a good time#AND THEN!! they give you NOTHING in return?? not even a recorder?? no jewel no recording nothing. just ignored like that by everyone#and i get that the girls dont know who's voting for who so they might have believed someone else was gonna give him a jewel or sth#but no one gives him anything (positive OR negative)#and yeah. he was absolutely shocked at the empty safe. i would have been too.#and why did they not give him a jewel y'all might ask??? IT WAS BC HE FELL SILENT DURING THE LAST BIT: THE DINNER#my gosh that's the part that i take offense to personally bc it's really really really difficult to always engage in convos with ppl#after spending the whole day with them already?? and your social battery is down so you quietly enjoy a simple meal??#and then all the girlies threw him away like that??#i mean yeah you're surrounded by sweet men who spend the day appealing themselves to you but come on??#i would have been so impressed by jeongwoo and thankful that he put that much effort in and would understand how difficult it is to#maintain it till the very end because not everyone has hyunsuk's boundless social energy#no offense hyunsuk i love you dearly#and also??? what's up with admitting that you lack some confidence upfront??#the girl's reasoning for giving yoshi the voice recorder was that he said he holds himself to a high standard and lacks confidence sometimes#and i get it. being confident is more attractive than someone who's always insecure and puts themselves down#(and makes the other person uncomfortable) but they were having an honest and deep convo when the thing he said in that convo was used#against him in the end? i would feel kind of betrayed too bc being able to admit that you feel insecure sometimes is a v brave thing to do!!
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ikishima · 8 months ago
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#the amount of compassion you have to pour directly into a bad-faith asshole's mouth without knowing whether there's even a point#in order to get them to the point where they're willing to engage at a level where they actually take your feelings & words into account#the point where they even start hearing you and seeing you as a potential equal in conversation#the point where learning and growing becomes a possibility#is fucking exhausting. and i understand why a lot of people refuse to do it. i understand why some people dont practice what they preach#because sometimes the congregation in question is just there to throw tomatoes without any intent of listening#but idc! idc! im not gonna let a bunch of assholes close my heart off. id rather be naive but kind and get taken advantage of#if the alternative is leaving people behind or making a single person feel the way i have felt#having good intentions but being unable to express it w/o negative emotion or without the correct words or not being given a fighting chanc#to never be seen as a person or heard or listened to is so hurtful#i never want to do that to someone#and if i have parted ways with you or made you feel like that at any point please know it is only when i have no other options left#i know it's an autism thing to be so utterly gutted at being misunderstood and i'm most likely giving energy to people who don't deserve it#but i dont care! i dont care!#my compassion IS a renewable resource because i keep feeding it hope and humanity#i get mad sometimes but please know every angry word i've ever said has stuck on my mind like a glue trap#i remember every fight i have been slightly too aggressive and potentially awful in since the fifth grade and i continue to ruminate#on harm i have caused however big or small#i feel so surrounded by hate and anger and i just want to be that person who doesnt get caught up in it and can be compassionate no matter#lots to think about today ...#x
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villainartist · 9 months ago
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there is smth to be said abt how chihiro is always always always depicted in feminine clothing in merch + supplementary material despite her horribly written backstory like.
at some point, if she really wanted to 'stop pretending', she could easily make the choice to wear smth more unisex and 'subtle' but she always goes for the cutest, most feminine looking outfits and its like girl........ girl.....!
#and do NOT tell me its for non-spoilery reasons that shes still included with the girls and always wears cute feminine outfits in merch#pretty much everybody whos brushed against danganronpa knows whats going on with junko#if chihiro really truly was just A Cis Boy Crossdressing To Avoid Bullying (which inherently doesnt make much sense to me)#then like. you think said Cis Boy would... idk... at least try toeing the line between feminine and masculine expression more...#nobody is forcing 'him' to wear cutesy outfits and frilly dresses and brightly colored tops and short shorts in the summer...! just sayin#her internalized transphobia was absolutely self-devouring. honest to god#it ate her from the inside#junko probably took a lot of her self realization and mental peace away abt her gender expression w that memory wipe#its so fucked up. jesus christ#and then u play the game and sakura is forced to touch her corpse to discover the 'truth' and everyone just instantly switches#to masc pronouns with no struggle#its so badly written lmao#lets not even talk abt the whole physical strength = masculinity thing going on with her#also ive entirely given up on caring abt how other ppl perceive her gender#its a battle nobody will ever win#canon says shes a cis boy#her continous choice to express femininely#even in scenarios where she'd likely have 'come out' to her friends#saying otherwise#its just like#as long as you arent telling me to kms over a trans hc#then i dont have the energy to care#bc ppl who see her as a cis boy will not listen or change their minds#and i will not change my mind abt seeing her as a girl#i will say tho ppl who make older chihiro designs#and give her an out of nowhere square jaw and broad shoulders#and is like 6 feet tall#you are weird. i know what ur doing
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astranauticus · 10 months ago
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idk what is it about that one throwaway line from han sooyoung about her writing 10 chapters in one day that finally broke me but oh my fuckin god i love her so much
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todayisafridaynight · 1 year ago
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me when i ship zhaohan 😔 there's next to no content unless i'm just not looking in the right spots
be the change you want to see in the world my man.... if i can trick people into thinking masadai is real then i know you can rally the troupes with them lovable goobers......
#snap chats#zhao and yeonsu ARE cute to me tho thats the thing. theyre so sillay#i dont have many ideas with them but i love drawing them together when i get the motivation#i love drawing zhao and joon-gi honestly since Like Ichi i draw them kinda differently from everyone else#/kinda differently/ zhao's a foot tall motherfucker#BUT NO with joon-gi i want him to be a bishounen protag... so it's fun giving him all those sparklies and anime energy...#tho it'd be more appropriate to go for a manhwa art style huh#something to practice me thinks...#REGARDLESS i believe in you anon..... get that propaganda flowing you'll gather a small group in no time...#if you're sick enough in the head <- me#oh but if you arnet confident or know what to do yet !!!! pixiv and twitter generally has a good amount of art for them#i know i happen upon zhao and joon-gi art when i scroll through twitter sometimes#of course you have to follow eastern artists but they ALWAYS have The Best And Most Delicious Shit#they never miss they're the only artists i follow on twitter im p sure LMAO#if you don't know what artists to follow on twitter though pixiv's your best friend#some people are scared of her but not me...... i'm too numb to everything... plus she does have a LOT of good stuff there#'趙ハン' is the zhaohan tag on there. there's 101 works but i know not every thing is tagged sometimes#like a lot of arakawa fam stuff isn't tagged 'arakawa family' or even 'arakawa'- just generally 'yakuza' or 'rgg' and stuff like that#just gotta do a lil digging my friend ! best of luck to you ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶
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formicarum-rex · 1 year ago
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World history prof sent us a chapter from a public domain "translation" of Caesar and asked us to analyze "Caesar's writing." But the copy they sent was actually a mix of close word-for-word translation, a bit of a paraphrasing, and the translator's own comments ("Caesar doesn't tell us where this camp was but it was probably in so-and-so," "this is among the most emotional Caesar's writing is in his whole account," etc). Which was frustrating, because Caesar himself speaks in the third person, and there's no demarcation between where these comments begin or end, and it leads one to doubt every little comment.
I went back to the introduction and the author/translator isn't claiming to do a proper translation, just render in English the story of his campaign. Which is fair! But it was a weird read going into it expecting pure Conquest of Gaul, like Caesar Would Not Say That About Himself.
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