#but i cant play the game and i dont want to watch anyone play it and i dont want spoilers

[qrowpilled]

hate when you find a character whose so infuriatingly Your Type that its embarrassing like yeahg no one is gonna be surprised when i announce this is my new Guy Of The Month

[phagodyke]

kind of annoys me sometimes how I can happily listen to my roommate explain the entire plot of whatever she's currently into but when it comes to my interests she can only listen for a few mins before wordlessly walking out of the room

[volo-omnia]

So my 2nd playthrough of PLA is going... interesting....namely because I am trying to 100% the game and complete the pokedex before the post-game. And I'm realizing it's actually. Quite hard.

And only now I realize on my 2nd playthrough about 80 hours in that a lot of the services in Jubilife are actually really useful. Partly because I have been playing this game a certain way. So I need to ask a second opinion.

Moonie's Raw PLA Playthrough:

Never buying anything in the shops, including the store, craft materials, Ginkgo guild, etc. Instead farming all of your materials in the wild for extra immersion (and also because I'm a cheap bastard)

No using Zisu's training grounds either. No tutoring moves or mastering moves with seeds of mastery.

No using items. Nothing that changes stats in battle or gains EXP like rare candies. Only using potions/revives IF URGENT. Not necessarily a Nuzlocke, it's just cheaper to just warp to a campsite bed.

No using items helping catch Pokemon either. No smokebombs, scatter bangs, etc. Just sneaking.

Refusing to use pokemon other than the starter. You can still have pokemon, but only as meat shields or trying to do research tasks for the Pokedex.

No battling the Frenzied Nobles in the boss fights. You only need to throw the balms. This includes the final Primal Dialga/Palkia fight and the final Arceus fight.

[yinyangle]

im gonna be honest i dont understand rtumblr (lore and the fact i find rping very very difficult) but yall r having fun and i support u all

[weaselishmcdiesel]

GRIPS YOU. I would love to play test if you wanted

NOTED!

[graciousmaximus]

i want to follow project moon bblogs btu there is problem: spoilers :(

[justanotheradhdian]

Morning fuckers.

I'm not a morning person. But I'm up at 5 am. And have no choice but to be awake at the moment. Why? THIS is wHAt my brain is doing to me. I've been writing this in my notes for like. Almost an hour now.

This is not edited for your reading pleasure. Enjoy.

The first half second of the Disney logo. Now the last twinkly little bit of it.

Two different parts of color your night. (THEY ARE ALTERNATING ITS 3 NOW)

very random thoughts. (So far I've had thoughts about the date I went on last night, several different things about Balder's gate 3. The idea to write all this down. Random thoughts about my girlfriend that I can't even remember anymore again. ((Random being like. Often very disconnected and only sharing the topic of her in common. As broad of a spectrum of how I want to propose, to how warm her skin is, to like. That one time she farted In my face and I threw up.))

Now there's the fusion fall loading screen, also playing in jumbled order

All it took for this to start this morning. Was sitting up just enough to drink tea, telling Brie thank you for said tea, and telling her she looked beautiful last night by the kopps waterfall.

5:20 or 5:30am Also the music in my brain. Has not stopped. While writing this. (or editing. Like 20 minutes later Yes I lied. Get over it.)

Sometimes it's simultaneously playing 2 or 3 different song pieces at once.

I don't know how to stop this.

There's no task to refocus on other than it's 5 am and I neED to SLEEP. 

It's just turning into a cacophony of undecipherable sound. 

Like I'll hear the "painted so vividly by you" Then suddenly my brain cuts to the opening to the fusionfall loading screen, then it plays the High note of color your night with the piano and stuff

Only the beginning and ending of when you wish upon a star

"Two hands meet at Zenith" "I want to say" high note part

OH GOD NOW GOLDEN HOUR JUST ADDED ITSELF

I mean. At least it's not totally mangled. 

Now I've got that weird bwoooa dududu dun de dun TikTok noise thing.

Color your night is back.

2112 just started. Behind my ears feels warm. It's also sped up for some reason.

And also playing out of order but hey.

Also I think I'm literally hearing static. Probably just the fan though. Wait no theres a subtle staticy ringing.

Like I don't think that high note part in my head is singing the right word even

I just keep getting something something Al-i-BYYYYYYYYYYY 

Goooooollldeeeeen hour

This has been constant for 40. MINUTES NOW. 

Somehow. My 4ish hour of sleep insane brain has decided to make this into a tumblr post.

WHY DO I WANT TO LIVE BLOG MY BRAIN THING NO PNE WILL READ THIS

I over tagged again.

Oh hey the music stop.

OH GOD MY EYES BURN WHY THERE'S NO LIGHT, MY PHONE IS ALMOST AS DIM AS IT GETS, ON NIGHT MODE, AND DARK THEME

Adfhusgicgovhvvohv whyyyyyyy

[theblankest123]

Oh boy once again i do not feel thethered to reality once again yayyyyyyyyyy!!!!

[toyherb]

mutuals would you like to game with me............ perhaps vc........

[coriphallus]

DA: The Veilguard Spoiler review pt2 - The Grime

this is a hard one to tackle without strawmaning anyone because itll be a direct response to alot of defense ive seen for the games morality system so ill just start by saying, iykyk

never a genre has been better equipped to discuss ethics than the interactive medium of games and yes, bioware games have been doing it since baldurs gate and no, theyve not always been 'centrist' and 'conservative'. im not even gonna entertain that idea. do you remember the cultural landscape DA:O released to? the landscape it was developed in? dont give me that just because zevran doesnt write in his little notes -that you can conveniently read- 'gay good. not me but me bisexual'

Thedas is a flawed world and its a world thats just as desperate to hang on to its status quo as our own. every time you play an elf thats thriving, or a human thats queer, or a mage thats not institutionalised you exist in a world that doesnt want you, it is an act of defiance that you do.

im sure we can all see why these games were so popular with the audience they can only weakly try to pander to today.

derailing time again; so one of my favourite paintings of all time is saturn devouring his son. it makes me feel so uncomfortable that it gave me nightmares as a child, and i still cant look at it without feeling this knot in my throat. i hate it. i hate how it makes me feel, how that man looks at me in terror like its begging me for help while cannibalising another. weird story but i was bewitched by that painting as a little kid.

it is not a well drawn painting, the proportions are all over the place, brush strokes crude and inelegant. it doesnt even have a deeper story nor was it intended for an audience. i will never know what goya thought of when drawing it.

i thought alot about that painting later in my life when i was struggling with mental health problems, i thought about goya alot too as an adult and after learning about his life. i stared at his paintings and remembered when i told my dad that i hated [saturns] big eyes and hed jokingly said "it would be scarier if he didnt have eyes"

i know what the drawing looks like now, nearly everyone with a little access to the internet does. if somebody removed saturn from it, we'd still be left with a brutalised headless carcass of a man in a canvas too big for itself. if we removed that too all we'd be left with would be void.

i dont want to live in a world where all i know of goya is his rococo work, i dont want to stare at the painting of a void knowing what filled it before. i hated every second of germinale but i never wanted it to be anything other than itself, the story it tells could never hold credence otherwise.

DAV has done its best to paint over it, but its still on the old canvas and i cant look away from the negative space its left, i know whats under it and it unsettles me, infuriates me. it hands me a palette with baby blues and pinks and tells me to paint over it to make a prettier painting. didnt i hate the eyes? wasnt it gross before?

i am not going to write why we need some grime in art, but its absence is disheartening. and to those who say hanged people in the streets or blighted villagers is dark and mature ill say no. its a kids idea of maturity, its the aesthetic of it with no substance. it means nothing to me if rook can just drench themselves in gallons of blight as they crawl through it. the horror of blight has never been the black goo and slimy tentacles, or the monster woman with way too many tits. it is watching people you love slowly fade away, it is a woman who was forced to cannibalise the contaminated flesh of her friends because the woman she loved betrayed her, it was the sheer scale and inevitability of it.

one area we go to is overrun by it and the game begs me to feel hopeful that flowers are growing again when it never let me lose hope. people have already prevailed, they have roofs over their heads and a steady supply of food on their tables. their spirit is unwavering.

its bad, everybody says. the sky is grey and soil is blackened, as my rook turns some statues to access a haunted house whos inhabitants are long gone and the only story they could ever tell is gone with them.

if the question is do i want to see famine? plague? misery? abuse? assault? the answer is yes. yes. i want to see it all of the filth. i rather face the fucking monster head on with its big bulging eyes and misshapen limbs than stare at the abyss its absence leaves on the canvas.

and if nothing else, this bastardization is disrespectful to the people who gave the IP its fame.

Why choose to be good?

back in the bsn days ive wondered why, even in a fictional universe where your choices have no real-life repercussions what-so-ever, players had more 'good' playthroughts than 'bad'?

what happens when you start killing NPCs, when youre needlessly mean to them? the game actively closes off its own content. you get less out of the game. just as, completely incidentally, you'd get less out of your life if you just started killing everyone around you. The world would be emptier, youd be alone.

in that quote i stole from good place chidi doesnt ask "why be good?" the wording is painfully deliberate. doing good is always a choice, and often not the easy one. what makes the act matter is that you chose to do it, even when given 6 other options not to. did i stop in the middle of an important quest to help a man retrieve an heirloom from a darkspawn infested hut? did i hear what that heirloom meant to him?

i cant stop thinking about that speech ever since playing this game after knowing its predecessors.

So, why do it then? Why choose to be good, every day, if there is no guaranteed reward we can count on, now or in the afterlife? I argue that we choose to be good because of our bonds with other people and our innate desire to treat them with dignity. Simply put, we are not in this alone.

i cant stop looking at this game that spits on its own legacy and think how could they have missed what fundamentally makes us human so bad, what makes us relate and empathise with eachother. what makes us pick the option to interact with an npc who openly hates what hawke is, and allow us to see the traumatised man underneath.

these characters of fiction are written by real people. i have absolutely nothing in common with a guy from canada yet for a brief moment in time i feel a sense of camaraderie as ive felt with goya that i couldnt articulate as a kid.

Nothing too terrible

DAV says it over and over again -as its wont to do with every piece of its flimsy morality- that people can change, people can be redeemed yet it shines as the game with most static characters in its franchise. it simply says things, and since it has nothing to show for it it makes sure to say it repeatedly, in case you missed it.

so when i first played DAO i was in high school, i started with a human noble because fresh out of dark side edgy kotor fame i wanted to be a posh brat. also because, ya kno, we were poor my entire life up until that point and i wanted to have power.

i committed to it, even as the game stripped cousland of everything he had, because i thought a man like him would. i picked the racist options, the sexist options, the options a man in couslands place would. halfway point of the game as i exhausted the initial dialogues something happened; this man who got paid to kill people, who showed no remorse nor care for his victims, begged my cousland to stil his blade.

and i did. i thought maybe he would be as confused as i was, maybe he had a moment of clarity but from thereon bit by bit he was less of an asshole. the characters grew around me, and my character grew around them. i chose to be good because -textually- we were in this together, at the end of all things.

rook is not a character, theyre a mascot. and quite frankly i think they may be a very evangelical mascot because they remind me of evangelical preachings of jesus more than the man from the bible (and i say this as someone whos only exposure to christianity has been through foreign media and the bible ive read that one time). they are the epitome of do no evil and their existence hinges on the frail concept of moral purity. theyre not a person trying to do good, who wants to be good, they are 'good'

-and lemme tell you its a wild choice to have someone like that locked in a prison of 'regret'-

rook can be mean to only one person in the game, and thats someone they dont even have a personal beef with for the most part. but even then they would be shouting at a wall because the game doesnt only undermine them with its narrative, but also every npc in the game suddenly gets possessed by the ghost of wattpad rejects past for a moment to tell them everyone can be redeemed. and i believe it because i played the other games, i believe it because i know zevran and sten and morrigan, isabela and thom and iron bull and dorian. i know it because i can see the vague shapes behind the new coat of paint but i am not rook.

so no, the game fails to get people-can-change points by its own merit, and it cannot gain points from its prequels because it destroyed them. none of those characters i watched grow exist in this universe. zevran cant exist with DAV crows, fenris` story cant exist in an imperium with invisible slaves only glimpsed through empty cages and broken chains left scattered on the ground. i dont know which morrigan this NPC is, is it the woman who grew to learn kindness, who begged to sleep with her friend just to save them despite knowing it would play into the plans of a destiny she so desperately tried to break free from? or is she the clever puppet her mother groomed her to be who wanted to harness the power of a god? i dont know her, i dont know this dorian or this isabela beyond their names ipso facto this is not a sequel.

bellara asks an assassin why he is trying to save the world and his answer is "ive done some things in the past im not too proud of. nothing too terrible, but some of it was bad." and i can hear the games desperation for me to not engage with its material in that 'nothing too terrible'

lucanis never killed anyone innocent, taash never harmed an animal they could shoo of or reason with, emmrich venerates the dead and is friends with every wisp he pulls to use in menial labour, davrin joined the wardens willingly because he wanted to do good...

rook tells harding that her anger is justified when shes not even allowed anger of her own.

nothing too terrible.

aside from creating boring and nonsensical and static characters it creates a dreadful echochamber that we're forced to sustain. No taash is not valid, their gender is but their behaviour is not and for the character to grow and mature it needs to be addressed. lucanis doesnt need to be pampered in shock blankets he needs to see how repressing his problems and jeopardising his health puts people around him in danger etc etc. they are adults and they need to learn more complex ways of healing. and if rooks flaw is that theyre an enabler, then that needs to be acknowledged by the narrative in some way too, and not mindlessly endorsed because they say some buzzwords.

none of these interpersonal relationships feels real because none of these people feel real beyond some draft of themes and tropes. some interactions literally remind me of two bots in facebook comments

i look at this dialogue wheel with familiar symbols and all im reminded of is hawke telling carver he carries every death with him, of him telling his uncle that he wasnt fast enough, of him begging the person he loves to tell him that his mothers death wasnt his fault.

and they dont. they just sit there with him.

[austinsastrology8991]

Mars Aspects, how you like to WIN

if you win,i dont win so i gotta turn my loss into yours, becsuse we can't all be winners. i didnt change my mind, just chose a better outcome, whats your choice?

Mars aspecting sun - winning at all costs, they appear like a winner, but the means and ways they go about it are so in your face, you become impressed but simultaneoulsy concerned. but thats what gets them off. they turn the expression show dont tell, into show and tell everybody. which gives them more enemies, but also makes em more fierce. also flambouyant just to throw their enemies off lol. mars aspecting moon - they like to win behind closed doors. they want you to belive in them, simply becsuse they believe in you. its what gets them emotionally secure i guess. the security of winning. but its just confusing becsuse for example we watching tv on da couch, and your trynna pull a funny. sit down we still love you we just tired. but if you put them in there place expect a tantrum. mars aspecting mercury - basically death note. intellectual competitors/debators always playing the chess game of anything; "whats the best move here" also super entertainign speakers, can talk super fast and aggressively. also very into learning, they want to dominate the intellectual sphere. they wanna argue with everyone but no one wanna bite back lol. also > can't catch deez hands

mars aspecting venus - agrresively charming. there charisma just exudes from there aura naturally, people just laugh at these guys so easily, because they just are likeable with it. also people love it when they are angry, they just fall for em harder. but they dont like to get angry becsuse theyd rather just be charming mars aspecting jupiter - so much movement, they move like the "wacky waving inflatable arm tube man" - family guy. but seriously the way they move peopple just cant believe they move like dat, they move so strangely but hypnotically. also so much energy these guys can do a million sets in da gym and eat the whole fridge. they just got way too much energy and it shows... they also just get really lucky w competition, victory just lands in their lap lol. mars aspecting saturn - these guys are always striving to be da best at whatevrr there mind is set on. if they gotta goal, then whatsver is obstructing there path better move or they gonna trample all over it/ya. kinda intimidating. but this usually sets them back, but in the end only makes them stronger/ more fierce. because to them the fear people have of them is also getting in there way lmao. unless it works to there favour... basically control freaks and they only care about their agenda, but will pretend to have your interests in mind, just to get there ends. mars aspecting uranus - these guys are the true psychopathic freaks, everyone i know with this aspect is sadistic and also enjoys getting hit. people stay away from them, because they know they just wanna hit them lol. even when they acting nice, after like a week they show their crazy psychotic side, and everyones like yeahhhhh idk about you. but they dont mean harm they just view violence as intriguing i guess.... they like to win by fighting everyone and anyone lmao, but its play fighting, unless you try them... they really are the psychopaths; extremely calculated and precise with there attacks. they think they doing you a favour by attacking you lol. mars aspecting neptune - idk why but they always getting sexualized, probs because they are an easy target, and there submissiveness gets people going like "i can hurt them and they will literally just apoliogize :D" i feel bad for these lot, but there forgiveness really does shine through, i guess they dominate through submission... go figure. they like to win you over with their pure hearts <3 mars aspecting pluto - they literally do nothing and everyone is intimidated lmao. you can just tell these guys will not just kill you but torture you and enjoy it lol. thats why they always acting like they are not a threat, because they are begging for someone to challenge them, but they are so bad at acting innocent, everyone can tell they are a wolf in sheeps clothing. its all or nothing with them. but they choose their prey very carefully... they like to win at all costs no matta the price.

[paiges-1vur]

welcome to the party… as always enjoy loves <3 (pt. 1/4)

Friday 9:00 pm

I looked at myself in the mirror, my jaw dropping immediate as I turned to my proud best friend. My roommate Riley looked down at me.

“What do you think!” she asked smiling ear to ear.

Despite being somewhat of a girly girl, I never had a good sense of style. (thats where Riley comes in). Tonight when I heard we were going out to the bars I decided to let her get me ready. Turning back to the mirror I saw my long golden brown hair straightened reaching almost past my butt. My hair has always been one of my favorite things about me. She had also done my makeup, and had gone for a soft glam which suited me well. i never looked good with lots of makeup on. If anything i feel more confident without any at all.

“Do you the think the skirt is too much?” Riley says, snapping me back into reality. I scan my outfit. Im wearing the infamous “is this too much for a little bar in jersey..” top and i laugh to myself. Riley paired it with a jean mini skirt. Emphasis on mini.

“I like it” I smile up at her. Despite my smile sees right through me.

“But what” she asks, anticipating my reply.

“Don’t you you think i look like a..” I trail off, “a whore?” Don’t get me wrong i loved the outfit, but being blessed as a C cup and having a good ass on me made me worried about what people would think if they saw me in this outfit. I loved playing volleyball at Uconn, and being one of the shortest players to go D1 at 5”1. It was one of my biggest accomplishments.

Im not one to brag but I do have a pretty good body. I have a toned stomach from hours of being im the gym, and a good ass from weight training with my teammates. I just didnt want anybody to get the wrong idea about me based off of my outfit.

“Ana, dont worry about it. If anyone has something to say about the way you look tonight, then they can talk to me first.” Riley reassured me. Her confidence is something i only wish i could have. I took a deep breath and gave her a hug.

“Thans ry. By the way i love this outfit. 10/10, chefs kiss.” I do a little spin for her showing a full 360 of the outfit.

Riley hypes me up before grabbing my hand and taking me into the kitchen of our small apartment. Its not much, but its nice to live off campus. I watch her grab the fireball from the kitchen counter as she flashes me a smile.

as shes pouring me a shot i secretly pray to not get alcohol poisoning tonight. Tonight was one of the biggest going out days at Uconn, especially because the woman’s basketball team had just won the big east tournament. I wonder if the team would be out at teds tonight.

“Ready?” I get pulled out of my delusion to see Riley handing me the shot. I throw it back and immediately feel the burning in my throat reaching for a caprisun as a chaser.

“Shit its 9:30 already and we cant miss the pre game come on!” Riley grabs me by the hand and rushes us out the door.

____________

“Who’s dorm are we going to again?” I ask basically screaming over the Drake blasting in Rileys car.

“Remember that girl Azzi I had cognitive science with?” She looks at me. “Her and some of her friends are going to Teds tonight too and invited us to pregame with them.”

I feel anxiety wash over me. “But Riley she doesn’t even know me! And you know how i get… I’m not good at socializing or meeting new people.”

“Don’t worry she told me i could bring a friend, and shes exited to meet you and introduce you to her friends. I promise it’ll be fun, they are all nice girls.”

We park next to her building, getting out of the car to walk up to her dorm together.

I fix my hair and bit my lip anxiously waiting for Azzi to answer the door. What am i getting myself into?

__________

[meo-eiru]

Micah. can we honestly e date? you’re so beautiful. You always make me laugh, you always make me smile. You literally make me want to become a better person... I really enjoy every moment we spend together. My time has no value unless its spent with you. I tell everyone of my irls how awesome you are. Thank you for being you. Whenever you need someone to be there for you, know that i’ll always be right there by your side. I love you so much. I don’t think you ever realize how amazing you are sometimes. Life isn’t as fun when you’re not around. You are truly stunning. I want you to be my soulmate. I love the way you smile, your eyes are absolutely gorgeous. If I had a star for everytime you crossed my mind i could make the entire galaxy. Your personality is as pretty as you are and thats saying something. I love you, please date me. I am not even calling it e dating anymore because I know we will meet soon enough heart OK I ADMIT IT I LOVE YOU OK i hecking love you and it breaks my heart when i see you play with someone else or anyone commenting in your profile i just want to be your boyfriend and put a heart in my profile linking to your profile and have a walltext of you commenting cute things i want to play video games talk in discord all night and watch a movie together but you just seem so uninsterested in me it hecking kills me and i cant take it anymore i want to remove you but i care too much about you so please i’m begging you to eaither love me back or remove me and never contact me again it hurts so much to say this because i need you by my side but if you dont love me then i want you to leave because seeing your icon in my friendlist would kill me everyday of my pathetic life.

Holy shit is this a copypasta if so I don't think I've ever seen such a long one and if not DAMN ANON you're dedicated

[shuxiii]

Zealous jealous— Kang haerin x reader x Hanni (subtle)

Synopsis: you confessed what you’ve felt for her but it seemed like she didn’t feel the same? But that all changed when she saw you in another persons arms.

Requested: anon

You were pretty sure from the moment you caught a glimpse of her, she was going to be stuck in your mind for the rest of your nights.

It didn't help that she was only a room away—it didn't help that you were madly in love with your own member.

It just happened, love was unpredictable sometimes unimaginable. You wont know what hit you is the perfect metaphor you could explain what it felt.

She was just the right person you want to love, she fit exactly your hopeless romance daydreams.

She was nice, from her expression to her acts; she was an angel in disguise to you. Her smile was bright and warm, albeit clichéd. Her giggle was so contagious and endearing that you couldn't help but laugh along with her.

Love really does change people, whether for the better or for the worst.

You could say you and haerin were inseparable, you both were close since since debut. And that bond was the knot that led you to see her more than just a friend.

And no matter how close you two are, some people only adore from afar; you wanted that, but how can you admire from afar when she's only a foot away?

You sit just beside each other, even then sleep beside each other, eat together, watch together.

How exactly can you admire from afar if shes so near?

But even then, you tried to hide it anyway. You didnt have the courage to do so and even jeopardise such friendship, you never want to make things awkward for any of your members.

Yet, a heart get what it wants.

It was a little loud in the dorm, everyone gathered in a circle playing a game of truth or dare.

“C’mon Unnie! This isnt fair, that dare is way too mean!” Hyein complained.

“A dare is a dare hye, you must do it!” minji laughed loudly, clutching her stomach.

Hyein whined in annoyance, shooting glares at Minji. Because She was dared to eat a stick of celery.

As they kept arguing, the other two girls tried to stop the two from starting a brawl, while haerin just laughed at the scene that behold infront of her.

while she was distracted laughing you were taking a few glances at her, you cant help but hold back your smile not to make it too obvious.

Hanni had to tap my arms to gain my attention since I was too engrossed in my helpless daydream.

“Hey yn?” She says “you there”

I look back at everyone, as all their stares were now focus on me, making me embrassed.

“Yeah sorry, just a little distracted” I awkwardly laugh.

“Well then truth or dare!” Hyein, smirked “its your turn to pick now.”

I decided to pick truth, because i know how mischievous hyein is when it comes to these.

And as if she read my mind, she immediately said,

“Who do you like?”

I nervously scratched my nape, acting unconcerned, but my heart was pounding as I felt her stare.

“That’s a silly question, of course i dont like anyone,” i say.

“C’mon its so obvious,” She says “You like—“

“Okay, thats enough” Hanni laughs “Dont pressure yn like that, i want it to be my turn now!”

You mentally reminded yourself to give every bread hanni wants.

You give a light pat to the back on hanni, thanking her. She looks back at you smiling a little.

And despite after avoiding a close one, for some reason her gaze never left you, and that made you nervous you knew she liked to stare at people but this one felt different it felt like you were trap in by her eyes.

After playing a couple of more everyone has started to retreat back to their rooms, after hearing hyein yawn signalled that it was time for bed.

But you decided to stay in the living room to clean up the mess that were scattered.

You assumed everyone already went back to their rooms but that didnt seem to be the case, after everyone was gone you were left alone in the living room.

Thats until you heard faint footsteps from behind.

“Yn,” a familiar voice call out to you.

You look back to see the same eyes you’ve grown to love each day.

You felt yourself slightly blush, and you didnt know why.

“Oh, rin?” You say “why are you still here, shouldnt you be asleep?”

She didnt respond, she gazes back at you with an unreadable expression. And that made you anxious.

“Is there something wrong?” You ask again.

“Who do you like?”

You felt your body tense as it felt like a lump got stuck on your throat, you try to hide it.

“Haha, I dont like anyone” you try to play it off “seriously, dont believe hyein she just loves to mess around.”

She didnt seem to be convinced at your answer.

“Do you like hanni?” She ignores what you say.

“What no!” You tell her “like i said i dont like anyone.”

You despised lying, particularly to her. However, it seemed to be a better option than saying the truth.

“Why does Hanni know and i dont?” She continues “You guys seemed to have gotten closer—even closer than we are now.”

It was inevitable; you knew she'd figure it out eventually and the stalling would no longer work.

“It’s complicated, rin…”

“What is complicated about liking someone and telling me?” She says “do you not trust me enough?”

“Its not like that!” I stammer, “You wouldn’t want to know, trust me.”

I felt my heart take its pace, and the it wasnt the good type, it felt like it would drop any moment and theres nothing to catch it.

I could see her frown in the corner of my eyes as I avoided her gaze and focused on the polished floor.

“Why wont I want to know who you like, yn?” She says “You’re my best friend, of course I want to know everything about you.”

Of course that word “best friend” that’s all she ever sees me as a friend not a lover, not someone she wants to talk with about everything single detail of her life, not someone she greets in the morning, not someone she sees more than just a friend.

“Rin…” I mumble.

“I just dont get it, why wont I want to know?”

“It’s because, you’re the one I like,” i say with a shake in my voice, still avoiding her gaze.

And for once, the silence between us was different; it wasn't comfortable, it didn't seem like the silence we'd share whenever we were together—it felt deafening, yet too quiet for you, you wanted her to say something but it seemed like all she could give you was nothing.

“Yn…” the sympathy in her voice, made me hate it more, she was too kind.

“Yn, look at me,” she says.

I didnt want to look at her becuase i knew the moment i did, the answer would be there—one gaze was enough to be the answer.

“Please…” she pleaded.

It felt impossible, but i did anyway. And just like that, her eyes revealed the answers, and it hurt—it wasn't the eyes of someone ready to love me, it was the eyes of someone ready to tell me the things I don't want to hear but are the only thing I'll get.

“I’m sorry.”

Two words. Two words was all it took.

It was the first two words, but the last. And everything altered radically from the way it was.

Every since that you tried to be more normal around her, but it was harder than you expected—it felt force for you, you couldnt forget about her properly, you decided to find a better distraction—a diversion away from her.

And Hanni has been there for you ever since; when she spotted you crying in your room, she was there. She was always there for you when you needed her.

you’ve grown more fonder with her and lost more familiarity with haerin, but that was for the best wasnt it?

It had been two weeks since you'd drifted apart from Haerin and further into the arms of Hanni's company; it's not that you weren't sad, but for the time being you kept a barrier between yourselves because you were frightened to be hopeful.

Haerin didn't seem bothered by it; she understood why you were avoiding her, but it would be a lie to say it didn't pain her any less.

You avoided her from seating beside each other, even standing just beside her—even hold a long conversation or have the ounce of courage to look her in the eye.

And that hurt her even more, but she tried to understand.

But her intuition were right, you’ve grown fonder with Hanni ever since the talk. It looked more like you guys were a couple than as friends, and she had this irritating feeling whenever she saw you guys.

Hanni would always cling to your arms, like someone would separate you from her. You used to do that with her, before.

Its like ever since you both stopped talking, Hanni became more closer, far too close for Haerin’s liking.

She didnt understand why she hated it.

And today was no exception; Hanni was clinging to you like glue. But this time the frustration feeling grew—the more she repressed everything she felt, the more clear it became.

She hated to admit it, but ever since she lost you, she began to love you.

The motto that goes, “you know its love when its too late”

Thats what Haerin felt at that moment. And it didnt help her case at all especially with hanni holding you within her arms—that should be her, she thought.

You were gathered in the living room, as usual, watching a horror movie, which Haerin knew you disliked, but Minji was eager to see the new conjuring movie. And knowing you, you never had the heart to say no.

And at this type of situation, Haerin was ready to hold you and give you solace but instead hanni took her spot and all she could do was stare as she puts her arms around you, smiling like an idiot. Haerin wasnt insulting Hanni at all, Hanni indeed looked like she was smiling a little too much.

She hated that.

She hated the fact that she was feeling what she shouldnt, she didnt deserve to feel this but in the end she does.

Did you move on already? Have you stopped looking at her like she makes the stars glow at night? Have you seen someone better than her?

The thoughts was enough to drive someone insane, and that made her more frustrated.

She didnt get it, she cant understand why she felt like this.

She looks at you, as you laid your head against Hanni’s shoulder, like you didnt do that with her before.

She wasnt mad, no. She was fiery of jealousy.

I mean who wouldnt? To see someone else doing the things you guys used to do.

Haerin was no longer interested in the movie since she was fixated on you. Her entire attention was completely on you.

And when the scary scenes came, her heart ached even more, as you reciprocated Hanni’s embrace.

She just couldnt take her eyes off you, she could remember each detail of your face like the back of her hands.

And before she knew it the movie ended and it was time to go to bed.

But she couldn’t sleep if it ended like this.

Everyone was already sound asleep, it was one in the morning.

You were awoken from thirst so you decided to get a cup of water in the kitchen.

With tired footsteps you carry the weight of your drowsiness to the sink.

As you leaned against the counter you lazily drank, letting your guard down.

And suddenly out of nowhere you felt arms wrap around you, someone was hugging you from the back.

You squeal, as you try to look back to see who it was but something stopped you from doing so.

“Yn,” a whisper, as you felt her lean her head against your back.

It was haerin.

“Rin?” You recoginized the voice right away, like a muscle memory.

You felt her relax, she missed hearing her name off your lips.

“hi,” she says.

“hello?” You reply “What are you doing?”

There was a silent pause, and it made you worried.

You try to face her but she stops you.

“Don’t move, dont turn around” she mumbles “please, I dont want to see you yet.”

And you agreed in silence.

“Are you okay?” You ask.

“No,” she says.

There was again a pause, you felt her warp her arms even tighter.

“I miss you.”

You felt the beat of your heart grow faster, but it ached as you recalled the past.

“Rin, you cant do this,” you frowned “this isnt fair.”

“I do miss you.”

“But it isnt fair, you cant do this to me.” You felt your voice quiver “You cant…”

“Yn—“

“you’ll just make it hard for me” you cut her off.

And even if you wanted to take her embrace off, you felt her tighten it even more.

“I love you, Yn.”

You thought you were hearing things but she said it again,

“I love you,” she says it a little louder.

You felt your body tense, hearing such words from her? Was this a dream?

“Are you messing with me right now?” You say “its not funny haerin.”

“Seeing you with Hanni, made me realise many things.”

“I was a coward, Yn.” She mumurs “I was afraid—afraid for such change, i was scared that if things change, I’ll lose you eventually.”

“And i dont want that, I cant bare to lose you.”

change was a complicated word, it could mean good or bad, haerin thought it was a hard and a big step thing to do, because how much she tried to hold onto something, it’ll never stay. Sometimes she wished things were different, she always ended with a “maybe” or “what if”

She was terrified of change because she had become accustomed to the way things were; it was a part of her everyday. And for such an alteration to occur, she was hesitant to take such a risk.

“Rin, why didn’t you tell me?”

You tried to face her but she didnt budge at all.

“Dont turn around yet.”

“I was just scared, if i told you—you’d wait and understand and i didnt want that, i thought it’d be too much of a burden for you.”

“You’ll never be a burden to me,” you say “even if you put bricks on my back, I’ll carry it.”

You felt her smile against your back as she holds back her laugh.

“You’re so corny.” She tells you “but that’s why I like you.”

“Do you really mean it?” You pause “do you mean everything you say?”

“I do, yn. Im just afraid but yet i was so happy when you said you liked me too, i wanted nothing but for you to feel the same.” She tells you “but i was just hesitant, i didnt want things to change, i had so much in my mind.”

“What if you fall out of love for me? And I’ll lose you both as a friend and as someone i love, its scary to evem think of it.”

You felt her fiddle with the hem of your shirt as she hugged you, like she always did when she was worried, so you held her hands intertwined with yours.

“Rin, you know, you’ll never lose me as a friend,” you gaze down at your hands interwinted at hers “you’re already a part of my life, and i dont want nothing else but for you to always be in my life, regardless of anything.”

You felt her hug loosen and then you felt something wet hit your back.

You finally got to look at her, and as you did—you saw her eyes glisten as tears were cascading down her cheeks.

And when she finally looked at your eyes, the answers were clear to her—maybe change was a good thing.

They say the more things change the more they stay the same.

Like the waves coming in on the beach, watch a fire. Watch the rain drops, river flowing, sunset, sunrise, everything's changing and nothing's changed.

The look you gave her was still the same, it was the same ones when they exactly met, it was adorning and shining.

She hugs you again startling you.

“Rin?” You laugh, feeling her arms wrap around you making you feel a little ticklish “are you okay?”

“Let’s stay like this for a while.”

[lowkeyrobin]

I'm sorry for spamming you I'm just really excited--

Reader who also streams and just rants a lot while they play Stardew Valley?

Like mid milking a cow or something they pause the game and rant about how to kiss someone or smth?...

-🌕 anon! <3

AH OMG DONT WORRY ABOUT SPAMMING I LOVE YOU GUYS 🫶🫶🫶 but I absolutely love this LMAO I made this into a preference setup instead of a oneshot bc I didn't know exactly who you wanted and I was having difficulty finding a way to stretch it out that long anyways. idk much about stardew valley so bare with me, I rewatched Tommy's video of him playing w Molly to help me 💀💀

MCYT ; stardew valley rants

includes ; tommyinnit, ranboo, freddie badlinu, niki nihachu, foolish gamers & quackity

warnings ; language

masterlist

TOMMYINNIT

you'll just be doing some tasks and be like "you know, I've never kissed anyone before. like, how does that work?"

meanwhile Tommy came over a little bit ago to hang out after stream and he just looks at you like 🤨😨

"youve never kissed anyone?? wait... we haven't kissed before? y/n/n, what?"

you shake your head no, confirming that you guys actually never kissed somehow, your relationship was kinda new in both of your defenses.

"we've only been dating like, 2 months, it's fine"

"ARE YOU TRYING TO BE A KISSING VIRGIN FOREVER????"

literally have your first kiss on stream bro

THE EDITS 🫶🙏 I CANT EVEN

the cutest shit ever

RANBOO

you literally paused the whole game mid-farming to rant about some restaurant you and ranboo went to the past day

chat was exploding with "oooo they went on a date" and you were just like "guys it was good food, 10/10"

they get you to join a call with them and you guys talk about it together and your whole experience and how awesome the food was

not to mention the aesthetic of the restaurant was so well put together

you got back to your stream with a little story for your viewers

BADLINU

you started ranting about a movie/show you're fixated on at the moment

went through all the lore, all the characters, background info, etc

Freddie was watching and using tts to talk to you

he encouraged it dw

like he was holding a convo w you and everything it was the cutest shit ever

the edits.

also people clipped the whole like half hour long thing and posted it to YouTube like "y/u/n and badlinu talk about ___!"

you don't even remember it within a week but HE DOES

just one of those cute relationship moments he loves to think about

QUACKITY

you were playing stardew while he was playing gta and you were on a vc together

so obv it kinda sounded crazy 💀💀

"y/n I'm gonna drive my Honda Accord over there and kill all your cows!"

"I swear to God, quackity, don't even dare"

not really ranting but you were yelling threats at him and shit LMAO

NIHACHU

you guys were playing together 🫶

you were teaching her how to do everything and stuff

you eventually went on a tangent about things you do and don't like about the game

she was agreeing to your solid points and stuff

that turns into a rant about hair color and if she can color your hair for you LMAO

FOOLISH GAMERS

"Dude, how do people do that van life shit? I'd die doing that"

straight up hour and a half rant about how much you hate van life tik tokkers while playing stardew valley

he's in your chat like "Yes 100 percent" and adding onto your points LMAO

you both share a hate for van life mfs

[the-muppet-joker]

can we honestly e date? you’re so beautiful. You always make me laugh, you always make me smile. You literally make me want to become a better person... I really enjoy every moment we spend together. My time has no value unless its spent with you. I tell everyone of my irls how awesome you are. Thank you for being you. Whenever you need someone to be there for you, know that i’ll always be right there by your side. I love you so much. I don’t think you ever realize how amazing you are sometimes. Life isn’t as fun when you’re not around. You are truly stunning. I want you to be my soulmate. I love the way you smile, your eyes are absolutely gorgeous. If I had a star for everytime you crossed my mind i could make the entire galaxy. Your personality is as pretty as you are and thats saying something. I love you, please date me. I am not even calling it e dating anymore because I know we will meet soon enough heart OK I ADMIT IT I LOVE YOU OK i hecking love you and it breaks my heart when i see you play with someone else or anyone commenting in your profile i just want to be your girlfriend and put a heart in my profile linking to your profile and have a walltext of you commenting cute things i want to play video games talk in discord all night and watch a movie together but you just seem so uninsterested in me it hecking kills me and i cant take it anymore i want to remove you but i care too much about you so please i’m begging you to eaither love me back or remove me and never contact me again it hurts so much to say this because i need you by my side but if you dont love me then i want you to leave because seeing your icon in my friendlist would kill me everyday of my pathetic life. I kin The Penguin.

I'm gay and I would never kindate the Penguin.