#but i better not say anything because then you'll just start doing it because i said
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reptilian-rapscallian · 21 hours ago
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Right I usually only talk about the marauders but I need to talk about Dan and Phil for a second because the fan response to the livestream ticketing is ridiculous.
I'm going to quickly preface this by saying that yes, the hidden service charges were INSANE and unfair, but they've since stated that starting today they're going to do partial refunds and lower the prices so that they're balanced better. It's very clear that they didn't know about the service charges, and people suddenly trying to imply that it was a malicious decision are driving me up the wall.
Since that initial issue, people have taken it as an opportunity to not only be overly critical, but to just insult them???
Firstly, £12 as a starter price for a livestream ticket is reasonable. Literally every theatre livestream ticket I've ever seen has started at £16-£18 and gone up from there, so realistically this is a reasonable price!! Chances are they did their best to get it as low as they possibly could without losing money. Tours are fucking expensive, with most people who tour either making minimal money or breaking even (something not even that), and running under the assumption that they're absolutely LOADED when they've been very open about the fact that they've got a mortgage to pay is WILD. They need to make money to be able to make content!!
Also, the vast majority of their content is free. They have far more free and readily available content than most other influencers out there. People are acting like it's insane to briefly put the tour behind a paywall, like wad didn't get ads blocked STRAIGHT after it became free and readily available. Also, it's not just access to the tour that you're paying for? There's a preshow/'red carpet', and then an after-party q&a if you've opted for the £16 or any of the merch bundles. If you don't want to pay, the tour will STILL be available to you at some point, and I think it's wild to act like it's unfair that they need to make money? I'm sorry, but they need to be able to pay their bills.
One thing I feel like it's most important to acknowledge is that you're not being forced to buy it. People are acting like they were held at gunpoint and forced to check out with the service fees. If PayPal checked you out without showing you the service fees (which is a PayPal glitch, not an issue from Dan and Phil), then you can get a refund pretty easily. If not, you can email and chances are you'll get a refund (if you want the whole cost back and not just the service fees because those are getting automatically refunded). However, acting like you saw the service fees, had the money and checked out anyway, means that Dan and Phil forced you to do it is WILD. Dan making a joke with a fan about skipping work (in which they called their job one of the most important in the world) is NOT Dan forcing everybody to miss life events for the livestream and I'm so confused about why people are seeing it that way. You're not obligated to do anything, and being mad at Dan and Phil for releasing merch bundles at all after buying one is genuinely unfathomable to me as a thought process.
Also, acting like they're not taking it seriously enough when they're actively doing what people asked and resolving the issue is wild??? If they had released an overly professional "statement" you guys would have jumped to call them cold and uncaring. This was easily the best way they could have resolved the issue, and I'm genuinely so confused by everybody being so willing to insult Phil's response as if he didn't do EXACTLY what people wanted them to do??? Also being mad at them specifically for the merch not being available internationally (which is definitely an issue) is insane because they don't actually control the merch shipments??? Like why are they suddenly expected to change something that chances are they don't know how to change???
Suddenly jumping to insult them personally, or going out of your way to accuse them of being hyper-capitalists is uncalled for and just plain rude. It was this shit that kept me from taking part in the online communities pre-hiatus, and I'm genuinely really frustrated to see it coming back. Acting like they're the biggest depiction of capitalism is insane. Have you ever shopped at Amazon? Literally any major supermarket? Any name brand ever? They're bigger examples of submitting to a capitalist regime than Dan and Phil!! As much as we can all (rightfully) criticise our capitalist society, we all have to feed into it to survive because it's so deeply ingrained into our lives. They need to eat, they need to pay their bills, and they're doing their best to make it fun for their audience.
Yes, the hidden service fees were insane. Yes, the merch bundles not being available internationally is upsetting. However, they're literally doing everything in their power to fix it, and were clearly unaware of these things before the tickets went on sale.
There's a difference between rightfully pointing out issues and just insulting them personally and being really shit about them??? They haven't forced you to buy anything and they're resolving the issue. Calm tf down.
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legendofmorons · 2 days ago
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Written in the stars (forever on loop) Chapter two - Catch my breath (what else can I do?)
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Pairing: eventual Poly! Chain x reader, platonic Wind & reader
Series Rating: T
Summary: Day two with the chain has its challenges. Thankfully, Epona and Wind are there to make things better. Four and Sky have a heart to heart while a late night talk with Warriors leaves you with some questions and thoughts.
Warnings: grief, cursing
Other: If I missed anything, please let me know
Previous masterlist. Next
Breakfast is your saving grace in the morning, especially because you need something to do that isn't focusing on everything that happened yesterday.
You sit by Sky again, though Wind sits on your other side.
Sky looks exhuasted, blinking blearily and having to stifle a yawn every so often. He's got puffy eyes... has he been crying? Maybe it was just a bad day...
No one else speaks to you or sits near you, though. There's a tense atmosphere you could cut with a very dull butter knife.
"So, what do you do back home?" Wind asks before stuffing a bite of his food in his mouth.
You smile politely, "I work, I listen to music, I talk to my friends and family. Nothing exciting. What about you?"
"I like to sail a lot." Wind says.
This isn't a surprise. He gives off pirate gremlin energy anyhow. It's good to know it is from a hobby and not just your own interpretation of what is apparently more than a video game.
You smile a little more real this time. "That's good, it's important to have hobbies. Do you live near the sea?"
"You know about the sea!" Wind declares excitedly.
You laugh a little, "Of course I do."
You can feel the way all the others look at you with strange gazes and furrowing brows or outright glares.
You focus your gaze on Wind, blocking out the others.
Wind looks absolutely delighted, though, his grin wide and bright. "No one else but Wild knows. You do, though!"
"I do." You agree easily.
The young teen is adoreable in the excitement that causes his ears to twitch a little.
Sky smiles too, "He's a fan of the sea."
"Maybe we can visit it." You offer.
Wind cheers, beaming at you. "I hope so!"
Time clears his throat to get everyone's attention. The air goes thick again around you.
You turn your gaze to the oldest, wondering yet again why he has the fierce diety marking on only half his face if he has them at all.
"We're going to keep looking for a town today, we need to get our new friends some supplies since they were caught unawares." Time says.
He hasn't looked at you. Most of them haven't looked at you. Not really.
You feel your face heat up a little. Embarrassment floods your being.
If you had known you were going to end up here, you would have prepared more!
"We should also probably see about finding a river or something soon." Warriors adds firmly.
The others agree with both sentiments.
Wind elbows you playfully, "Don't worry, we all got caught unawares at least once. I started my adventure by hitting things with sticks."
The teen gives a wink at the end, like he's telling you a secret.
You laugh, recalling that sequence in Wind Waker. Immediately, you feel guilty simply for having loved and played the games.
Apparently, the world of Hyrule is real.
Oh.
Right.
This is all so bizarre.
You played through what were probably horrible quests and memories for fun. (You didn't know! If you had known - breathe. You remind yourself to breathe.)
Last night's dreams were weird.
Everything is so different
"Don't overthink." Sky chides lightly although, it sounds like it's something he says on autopilot, his face twisting with an unreadable emotion.
Grief, maybe? But worry, too.
"Okay." You manage.
"Twilight, Wild, Wind, Legend, and Sky, you'll all look for a river. Warriors, Four, Hyrule, and I will take (Y/n) and look for a town." Time says.
No!
You don't want to leave Sky and Wind. They are the least tense!
At least you'll be with Four and Hyrule. They are far less intimidating than Time and Warriors.
"Don't worry," Wind whispers to you as he nudges your side lightly. "They're all big softies."
He gives you a dramatic wink.
You crack a weak smile. "Really??"
"Really." Wind assures.
"Thanks." You say softer.
The teen grins at you. He looks pretty eleated in general.
"Alright, when you are ready, we'll head out." Time says to you. He's finally looking at you, but his face is stony.
You acknowledge his words and work on finishing your food.
After you've eaten and everything has been packed up, the groups split up.
You are flanked by four men as you walk. Warriors and Four on either side of you with Time in the back and Hyrule beside him.
None of them talk except to tell you if you're turning. Their eyes never seem to be on you, but you swear they're watching.
The silence is strange. (Some strange subconscious part of you rails against the tense air around you. This is wrong!)
"So... uhm... what's with the portals?" You ask after a good twenty minutes of walking.
This seems like a solid start point. The silence is too much anyway.
The others seem to share a silent conversation around you. None of them look at you.
Warriors looks at you as he answers. "There is a Sahdow opening them and letting lose monsters of different eras."
You nod. That sounds like some Legend of Zelda stuff right there... You should probably stop thinking of this as a video game world.
Four sighs. "Of course we're all here because we're heroes."
"That makes sense... why am I here?" You ask, feeling as if you're in free fall without a parachute as far as information goes.
There's a beat of silence.
The men exchange glances around you, yet another silent converstion exchanging in seconds.
"We don't know." Time says evenly, a measured tone flowing in his voice. His gaze is still too heavy on you, as if he's daring you to do something.
"Okay." You manage.
Four offers you a slightly strained smile. "We'll figure it out."
His smile is wrong. His eyes are wrong. He dosen’t believe in what he says, does he?
"I hope so."
Hyrule hums once. "Are you a hero where you're from? That might make it make sense if you are."
You laugh a little, startled at the notion. "No. No, my life back home is... boring enough."
Four and Warriors both look spooked by your laugh, looking at you with frowns. The latter looks a little angry, too, with pinched brows.
Okay. Maybe it was rude to laugh?
"Oh." Hyrule says.
"Boring can be good." Warriors offers after a moment, face fixing itself into an overly polite mask.
You smile weakly. "I guess so."
"Are you a royal then?" Hyrule asks.
You laugh again. "No. I'm definitely not."
The silence comes back, heavy and awkward. You don't bother trying to break it again.
There's something wrong in the air. You just can't place it. You have barely interacted with any of them!
At least Hyrule and Four just seem to avoid watching you. Or maybe it just feels that way because Warriors and Time won't stop - even if you don't catch them, you can feel it.
What is it with these heroes and the staring problem?
Yeesh.
Hopefully, when you see Wind again, He can lighten the mood.
-------
The trip to town was awkward, stilted, and almost painful. When you're dropped off at an inn to what for the boys to get the others, you are relieved.
You've gotten a travel pack with a place for your bed roll. You've also been given a few spare clothes, which is nice.
You are apparently to share an inn room with someone tonight.
Hopefully, it's Wind or Sky. They haven't glared at you or made you feel unwanted.
You settle on one of two beds, wondering what you have done to earn their cold shoulders. Did you... over step somehow?
Maybe they know about the video games? They aren't self-aware in the game, hopefully?
Nothing makes sense anyway.
There's a knock at the door before someone calls. "Hey, it's just me! We're roommates!"
Wind.
Thank goodness.
The door opens to reveal a grinning Wind.
"Did you have fun?" You ask.
The teen is practically bouncing. "I did! It was great, oh my goodness! Wild and Sky got tangled up in some roots, and we had to finish a mini dungeon!"
"That sounds... busy?"
"It was fun! We got some rupees, too."
"That's good!" You say a bit more cheerily.
The boy grins.
He asks you about your trip, and you just say it was okay, a little awkward, but not horrible.
Dinner is quick, and every time you try to make conversation with anyone but Wind they look pained by the attempt, and it peeters out.
Even Sky seems a little skittish about you during dinner, although his eyes look puffy again. Maybe he's going through something?
You sigh, deciding to go see Epona. Maybe she'll let you pet her?
Epona is at least less scared of you. She just sniffs your hand curiously.
As soon as she sniffs you, she's pressing her face into your hand insistently, as if asking for attention. Who are you to deny her?
She's sweet, at least.
"Such a good girl you are." You coo to Epona sweetly.
She isn't at fault for the tense atmosphere of the boys.
Petting her mane gently is relaxing in ways you hadn't quite expected. She's all but leaning into it, a few soft snorts here and there but otherwise seemingly content to be near you.
"Aw, I wish I had something to give you, sweetheart."
Epona just leans a little more into your touch.
"I'll just keep an eye out. Maybe we can find an apple or something for you."
You can feel a few others watching you, but you don't turn. It's much nicer here with Epona than with the heavy silence and strained attempts at conversation provided by the boys.
Although Wind is certainly picking up some slack there, he deserves some cookies or something.
"How'd you get to be so sweet, pretty girl?" You muse.
It's a nice break from havin to be around anyone. Epona is so gentle and sweet, at least with you. She's happy to let you pet her man and sctach behind her ears gently.
Animals are amazing.
-------
Sky and Four take to their room, both looking forward to getting away from the painful reminder you are. They know it's not your fault, you seem nice, but still...
Grief is funny sometimes.
The moment the door closes, Sky's carefully polite face is falling into twisting grief.
Four just flops himself onto his bed. His head hurts, pounding like a horribly novice out of step marching band is playing their show inside his skull.
It's too much.
Sky just leans against the door, sinking to the floor with his head leaning back.
"Why couldn't they look different?" Sky asks in a shaking whisper.
The question escapes his mouth on accident.
Four turns over, so he's staring up at the ceiling. "I don't know."
Sky dosen’t turn. Instead, he just closes his eyes.
"It's not their fault." Four says, staring at the ceiling.
"No." Sky agrees. "It's not."
"I feel so bad for them." Four manages.
He does.
Against the grief and the anger and the stupid hope that twirl around his lost love, there's sympathy. Sympathy for the unexpected start of an adventure.
Sympathy for the lost look in their eyes at unfamiliarity scripts of hylian writing.
"Goddess... They looked terrified when they first saw me." Sky whispers into the room.
He uses that expression of terror to ground himself. It sounds bad. He knows it sounds bad.
But your terror is proof that you aren't his beloved sunshine.
His sunshine... never looked at him like that. They were never scared of him. Not when they saw him seal the imprisoned. Not when they saw him fight Demise.
They were never scared.
The expression of terror on your face chafes at his soul, but it helps him remember you aren't anyone else but a stranger in a scary situation.
"I think they're scared of Time." Four says.
Sky laughs weakly. "He is intimidating..."
"It's uncanny... They're identical in looks and personality."
"I know."
"How do you do it? I can barely look at them."
"I - can barely look away." Sky laughs, though it almost sounds like crying.
Four hums once, thoughtful mostly. His entire being, all of his colors, struggle under the grief you've stirred up. His empathize for his soul brothers is endless.
His grief is even more vast.
"Goddess. They'd be ashamed of me." Sky admits, "Dancing around a stranger trying to keep everything under wraps and falling apart as soon as the door shuts."
Four narrows his eyes, pushing up to lean on his elbows. His glare is trained on Sky. "Don't sully thier memory by assigning your shame to them."
"What?" Sky swallows, looking at Four with wide eyes.
The hero of skies looks like a kicked puppy, glassy eyes, and shaking form.
Four dosen’t care. Not now. Not when the memory of their soulmate's memory is being treated so poorly.
"They wouldn't be ashamed of you for doing your best in a hard situation. They wouldn't blame you for having complex feelings. Your own guilt shouldn't be projected onto their memory." Four says, or maybe that's Blue and Vio in control for now. Who can tell?
They all miss you. Every piece of him misses you.
"How could they not be?" Sky asks. "I'm messing everything up!"
"Legend hasn't stopped glaring at them, Time just stares silently, I can barely look at them. Sky, you're being more normal about this than anyone!"
"Wind is doing much better."
"Wind hasn't lost them yet. Of course, he's doing better." Four rolls his eyes, pushing down the envy.
"I know. I... Why does he still have them when no one else does?"
"He's fourteen. There's plenty of time for him to get fucked over like the rest of us." Four snaps.
"I didn't mean- I just miss them."
"I know." Four sighs, closing his eyes. "I know... I think we all do."
Silence falls over the room, heavy but not uncomfortable. It's the silence that falls over loved ones when they've had a hard conversation and need to think but still feel safe together.
Four falls back against the bed, trying to remember the way his lover once held him. Perhaps it's self destructive, but when it helps him cope, he dosen’t care.
He can feel the colors, his head is still pounding.
Blue is restless as ever, a rage at the reminder that you're gone. Anger that Sky could speak of your memory so poorly.
Green and Red are trying to calm it all down. They're trying to focus on the better times they had with thier lover.
Vio... is Vio. He's focusing on the facts again.
Like always.
Four focuses on his breathing, pretending that it's them here counting it instead of him.
Who knew trying to keep himself together would be so hard?
-------
You're outside trying to get some air after having the same dream from last night. The argument and lead up to something horrible in the dream is - draining.
The night air is chilly, but it's a nice relief from the stifling feeling of the bed.
Stars above you make out patterns you shouldn't be able to recognize, but you swear you see a set of stars that's supposed to be a harp. It isn't the harp constellation from your world, though. It's different.
You sit on the steps that lead up to the inn porch, leaning against the banister.
There's some sort of spinning string instrument tune stuck in your head, unplayable as the origin of the second and strange harp constellation.
There's the sound of the door opening and closing behind you. Probably another person in search of some air.
"What... are you doing our here?" Asks a man.
You turn, looking over your shoulder to see Warriors, still in his entire outfit, chain mail, and all.
His gaze is heavy, not as bad as Time's but strange as ever.
You sigh, trying to avoid tensing up at the sight of him. "I needed some air... I guess you do, too."
Warriors sighs, "You could say that."
"Don't let me stop you." You say, turning your head back to facing forwards and gazing out at the small town before you.
A lazy night breeze blows across you, ruffling your hair a little.
Warriors is silent behind you, a large presence. He's unmoving.
You're left wondering if he's still there for a moment.
It seems rude to check, though.
How he can be so still is beyond you, but you suppose that's probably a skill he picked up from the war. (A war you're not meant to know about.)
Warriors moves finally, walking until he's beside you. He stands there, unmoving again as he stares up at the stars.
"You shouldn't be out here without a weapon." He says finally.
You glance up at him. "Why? It's a small town."
"Ambushes can happen anytime anywhere."
"I can't say that's something I've had to worry about much." You admit. Which is true, for all the creeps and killers of your world... none of them are literal monsters.
Besides, you don't have a weapon right now. Why would you need one while traveling with the group?
"Count yourself lucky." Warriors tells you, "You should start worrying about it, though. Our group gets ambushed often."
You take a slow breath, trying to decide if you're supposed to respond or not. What do you even say to that?
He looks at you, face carefully neutral in a way that feels vaugley threatened. "You... aren't a fighter, are you?"
"Not the way you guys seem to be."
"You've never fought a war... have you?" Warriors asks in a soft voice.
He sounds- he sounds like your answer is important to this question. He sounds like you have some huge sway over what happens with this answer.
His face is still carefully blank.
"No. I've never fought in a war." You say slowly, trying to make sense of whatever this is.
Warriors let's out a slow, heavy sigh. "I hope it stays that way."
"Me too." You say.
You mean it, too. How could you not? Who hopes to get pulled into a war? Not you.
Moments pass, and thick silence seems to press in on you.
"I'm sorry." You say finally.
Warriors looks at you, face still unnervingly calm.
What life has he led that he's so good at neutral poker faces?
"Why?" He asks you.
That's a great question. Why are you sorry?
There's so many reasons.
You're sorry you played their games and enjoyed them.
You're sorry that you're here and slowing them down.
You're sorry that you came unprepared, and they had to step up.
You're sorry he's lost so much.
"I'm sorry I've been such a pain." You settle on. "I know I slowed you guys down and that you stepped up yesterday to help make sure I'm set up for whatever it is we've all been dragged into."
Warriors sighs while something heavy flashes through his eyes before it disappears. "You don't need to apologize. We weren't going to kick you aside."
"I guess. I'm still sorry."
"Do you know how many times I've heard these kinds of apologies?" He asks.
You shake your head. "No."
He looks up to the sky again. "Too many times. Too many people have told me they're sorry for things they can't control. That they're sorry for me doing something simple."
"Oh."
"Don't waste time or words on things like that." Warriors tells you with a stern look.
You would imagine it's a look he picked up as a captain.
"Okay." You breathe out softly.
"I mean it, (Y/n)." He says, though he sounds far away. It's like he's actually speaking to someone else.
Someone he lost.
"Okay." You say again softer.
-------
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tbyfandoms · 2 hours ago
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Home | Joe Burrow x Reader
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Pairing: joe burrow x f!reader
Word Count: 6.8k
Summary: after hearing news of a break-in, joe rushes to his house in hopes he’s not too late to protect what really matters (requested)
Warnings: depictions of a home burglary, mild swearing
Masterlist/Request Form | Ask/Tell/Request
AN: hello! according to the poll I made regarding this request, majority of you were interested in reading this fic, so here it is! I still don’t know how I feel about it, so please read only if you want to, and if it’s not your cup of tea, go ahead and keep scrolling! even still, thanks so much to the anon who requested this, I hope you enjoy! as always, lmk what you think :)
Your boyfriend's house is dark and quiet as you unlock the door and step inside. The serene atmosphere is a nice reprieve from the hustle and bustle of the downtown part of the city you just came from, and you can't help but revel in it.
To say you had a long day at work would be an understatement. It's Monday and per usual that consisted of everything that typically comes with a Monday. Meetings seemed to last forever, phones seemed to never stop ringing, and emails seemed never ending. Although you're grateful for your work and couldn't imagine being in any other career, you still find it tiresome at times. You're just happy the day is finally over and you're able to relax and wait for your boyfriend, Joe, to get home.
You were sad when you realized you wouldn't be able to attend Joe's game tonight, especially since it's a home game. The two of you have been dating for just under a year now, and ever since the season started you've tried your best to make it to every game you possibly could. Joe always insists on telling you that it's okay if you can't make it—knowing how busy your own schedule can be—but even still you try your best. Although you know he'd never admit it, he adores you coming to his games, and does get a little disappointed when you can't make it.
It warms your heart; the fact Joe has begun finding your presence at his games a comfort. You can see it in the way his eyes shine once they've found yours in the crowd, and in the way he'll always sneak in a thank you for coming to his game in a conversation you'll have afterwards in which he thinks you don't pay any mind to it—but you do, every single time.
Since you couldn't make it tonight, you figured you'd do the next best thing and surprise him once he gets home. You've planned to cook his favorite meal and maybe even put on one of your guys' favorite movies if Joe isn't too tired to stay up. You typically don't come over after a weekday game, knowing Joe's week is shorter and he won't have as many days to rest, but you figure it's okay just this once. Especially because the last time you checked the score on his game, you're pretty sure he'll be ending up with a win tonight, and what better reason to celebrate?
After putting away all the ingredients you brought over to use for dinner tonight, you head upstairs to Joe's bedroom. As you reach for the handle and push open the door, you find yourself marveling at the inside. No matter how often you come over to the house, it still never fails to leave you in awe. It's a beautiful house, one Joe's no doubt worked hard for, and it's truly something to be admired.
Making your way over to his bathroom, you turn on the light and begin to wash up after your long day. You figure you'll freshen up a bit before heading down to start making dinner, not wanting Joe to be met with your less than ideal appearance. Just because you had a long day doesn't mean you need to look like you did, for your boyfriend or for yourself.
Opening a drawer to your right, you rummage around in it looking for the products you need. You smile as you do so, thinking back to the day you filled this drawer with your stuff. It was about a month ago when Joe gave you a key to his house and told you you could bring over anything you needed, wanting you to be able to come over whenever you wanted and for you to be able to feel every bit at home when you do. The action nearly had you in tears, knowing how important it was. Joe's come to trust you deeply in the near year you've been dating, and him offering you the key and space in his house—wanting you to take it—solidified it completely for you. It's hard to do when you're in a position like Joe's, so for him to do that for you meant the world, and it still does to this day.
Sliding a brush through your hair, you almost drop it on the floor as you hear a loud bang come from downstairs. The sound startles you and gets your blood pumping, but you don't dare make a move, wondering what in the hell could've made that sound.
It's silent for a few minutes, nothing else seeming out of the ordinary. You brush it off and try not to let it bother you. You can't imagine what could've made that sound, but since nothing followed it you're sure it's nothing. Not anything to raise alarm for...right?
Turning off the light in the bathroom, you leave Joe's room and begin to make your way back downstairs. The house is darker now, the sun having long since set. You curse yourself for not turning on any lights, thinking you could make do with what little light was streaming in through the windows.
I swear to God if I run into something—
Your thoughts are cut off as you reach the bottom of the stairs and suddenly you're met with the sound of glass shattering. A scream nearly escapes your lips as you turn and see the sight before you. One of the tall windows that looks out into the backyard is completely shattered and it takes you only a second to make out the figures that are climbing through it and into the house.
Your eyes widen and you waste no time in turning around and rushing back up the stairs. When you reach the landing, you try to push away the fog of anxiety clouding your judgement right now. There's people in the house—presumably bad ones—and you need to find a place to hide and call the police, now.
Joe's bedroom enters your mind, typically a place of comfort and safety for you, but you know that's not a good idea. Whoever is here is no doubt looking to rob the place, and Joe's bedroom full of all his jewelry and designer clothes is most definitely high on the list of rooms to raid.
Fast footsteps against the hardwood floor downstairs have your heart rate spiking, and you make a split decision to hurry down the hall and enter the next best room to hide out in; Joe's office.
Shutting the door as quietly as possible, you lock it before running to the other side of the room. Your eyes trail over Joe's certificates and other accolades lining the walls and you hope to God that whoever's decided to break into Joe's house doesn't plan on trying to find any of these things. Maybe the office wasn't the absolute best idea, but options were limited, all things considered.
Dropping to the floor, you slide under Joe's large, oak desk. Despite your heart feeling like it's going to beat out of your chest, you lightly chuckle as you recall the memory of Joe telling you why he picked out this desk in the first place. He said it reminded him of one of his science professors' desks back at LSU. He said it always made his professor look serious and more old-fashioned compared to others. Joe knew he wanted the same vibe for his desk when he was setting up his home office, and because you know he's "so scholarly". His words, not yours.
With this desk, the front of it is fully enclosed. You aren't able to see the legs of the person sitting at it, which is good because as you situate yourself better under it you hope that even if someone does break into the office, maybe they won't be able to tell you're in here. That thought alone whisks away any remaining humor left in you and has you reaching for your phone, fingers rapidly tapping against the screen until you've successfully dialed '911'.
The call is answered instantly and you do your best to calm your shaking voice as you explain to the operator what's going on. More and more sounds of things crashing to the floor echo throughout the room, and the blows cause you to start crying as you practically jump out of your skin with each passing second.
The operator does her best to try and calm you, but she's not the one you want to talk to. She's not the one who will make you feel safe and like nothing's going to hurt you. So, despite her advice to stay on the line and after getting confirmation that the police are on their way, you hang up the phone.
You know he won't pick up, but that doesn't stop you from clicking on Joe's contact and holding the phone as close to your ear as possible. All you need is to hear his voice and let him know how much you love him.
As the phone continues to ring, the sound on Joe's end no doubt being drowned out by the roars of the crowd inside Paycor Stadium, you find yourself trying to ease your breathing. The tears are still flowing freely down your cheeks, but if you could just steady your—
BANG! A door slams open down the hall and a strangled cry leaves your lips as you realize the intruders have made their way upstairs and presumably into Joe's bedroom, which isn’t even twenty feet from where you are now.
Joe's voicemail clicks over and you basically burst into tears at the sound of his voice. You wish he was here with you right now, or even better that you were there with him. His short message ends and it takes everything you've got to keep yourself somewhat together in order to start talking.
"Joe, i-it's me. Something's happened—" your voice cracks and you squeeze your eyes shut, trying to hold back on breaking down. "Some people broke into your house. I'm here I-I wanted to surprise you after your big game. I called the police but I don't know when they're gonna get here. The burglars are still inside and I'm-I'm scared, Joey." You practically whisper the last part, your lip beginning to tremble as you try to focus on your message to your boyfriend but also on whether or not the people who broke in are getting closer to where you are.
"I locked myself in your office and I'm hiding under your desk. It got me thinking about when you told me why you chose this one out of all the options the designer gave you." You let a light laugh slip past your lips, trying to ease even just a little bit of the tension in your voicemail. "I love that memory of you, of us. I love all our memories together. This past year with you has been one of the best of my life. I appreciate all you've done for me, for-for all the love you've given me. I'm so proud of you, too. For all you've accomplished and all I know you'll accomplish. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, Joe. I love you—"
Hard, rapid pounding against the office door causes you to let out a scream and drop the phone from your hand. You reach up and slap your palm over your mouth, but it's too late. Whoever's on the other side of that door heard you and they know you're in here.
"Hey! There's someone in here! The door's locked and I heard a scream!" It's a deep, male voice and it's slightly muffled behind the door, but it's enough to send a shiver of fear down your spine.
The door handle rattles and even though Joe has a nice house, it's also not Fort Knox and it won't take much to break down the door if that's what the man behind it chooses to do.
As you work up the courage to look around and try to find something to protect yourself with if the guy outside does decide to break in here, you're immediately stopped in your tracks, a second male voice drifting in from the other side of the door.
"Forget about it, let's go! If someone's in there, they probably called the cops already. We gotta leave, now!" You've never been more grateful to hear something in your life.
Good, you think. Maybe they'll leave and this will all be over.
No sooner do you think those thoughts, three more loud raps on the door surround the space you're in, causing you to nearly hit your head as you jump up out of fear and surprise. You're shocked the door doesn't cave in, the rattling sound of the hinges echoing as one of the males behind it starts to cackle loudly.
Sick bastards.
Strained sobs continue to rack your body as you listen in on the burglars—not so quietly—leaving Joe's house. Part of you wants to feel relieved. They're finally leaving, they probably stole so much stuff, but at least they're gone. But another part of you is crippled with the fear that they can just be waiting for you to let your guard down and come out of the office. Your mind reels with the possibilities of what can happen if you get up and walk out that door right now.
You're scared, too scared to even chance it. So, with your dying phone clutched in your hands, you sit and wait.
As time passes, every sound seems to echo around you, sending a jolt of anxiety through your body each time. You're terrified that the people who broke in will come back, or that they never even left in the first place and these sounds you're hearing are really just them roaming around the house.
Your fears seem to become a reality when suddenly you hear footsteps bounding up the stairs. You can hear deep male voices once again and you instantly start to panic.
You shoot up from under the desk and quickly grab one of the trophies Joe has on a shelf. There's only one reason the intruders would be coming back up here, and you'll be damned if you go without a fight.
Hands shaking, you lift the trophy beside you, not even completely sure if you'll be able to do any real damage with it considering there's at least two of them and only one of you, but so be it.
The handle on the door shakes and your breath gets caught in your throat. Your grip tightens on the silver statue and then—
"Cincinnati Police Department! Is anybody in there? Call out!"
*****
Joe's heartbeat hammers in his eardrums as he jogs off the field and into the Bengals' locker room, the sound of the roaring crowd filling his chest with pride. Another win is under his belt and he feels as if this season is finally going in his favor. The game was brutal, but a good game always is.
Taking off his gear quickly, the Bengals quarterback tries to steady himself as he comes off the high of the win. It's always such a surreal feeling, playing in the NFL, let alone winning a game in it. The blonde doesn't think he'll ever be able to get used to it.
As Joe grabs a towel from his locker and begins wiping off as much of the dirt and grime from the game as possible, he catches his phone screen light up in the corner of his eye. He smiles at it, knowing it's probably his parents, a friend, or maybe even you texting him after the big win.
His grin widens when he sees the message is from you, a voicemail actually. Joe glances up slightly, looking to see if any of his teammates are noticing him grinning like a maniac. He can't help the way he feels when he thinks about you, and these guys make damn sure that Joe doesn't forget it.
Pulling on a fresh shirt over his head, Joe contemplates whether he'll have enough time to listen to your message before he has to head off to do his presser. He decides it's worth the risk of being a minute or two late, anything to hear your sweet voice after a day of not getting to talk to you.
As Joe slides on his shoes, he holds the phone up to his ear after pressing play on the voicemail. It takes only a second for your voice to come through and only a second more for your boyfriend to realize there's something very, very wrong.
"Joe, i-it's me. Something's happened—" The crack in your voice leaves a crack in Joe's heart, and in an instant he's back in game-mode, only this time his objective isn't to score a touchdown, it's to get to you.
In a flash the blonde has snatched his keys and wallet from his locker, the rest of his stuff not even a concern as he starts making his way to the garage where his car is parked. His teammates are loud as he navigates through them to get out of the locker room, but still your voice is the only thing he hones in on.
"This past year with you has been one of the best of my life. I appreciate all you've done for me, for-for all the love you've given me. I'm so proud of you, too. For all you've accomplished and all I know you'll accomplish. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, Joe. I love you—" Your scream is the last thing Joe hears before the message ends, and the sound sends his heart plummeting to his stomach.
The quarterback can't even think about replaying your message or hitting the "call back" button because suddenly there's a tug on his arm and his trek to make his way to you is put on hold.
"Yo, where's the fire? I know we won but I've never seen you that eager to do a press conference before, bro," Ja'Marr laughs. The humor doesn't last long though because in no time he notices the serious look on his friend's face. "Ay, what's wrong? What's going on?"
"Y/N's in trouble. My house got broken into, and I guess she's there but I don't know if she's hurt or what's going on. She left me this voicemail and-and she screamed before the line went dead. I don't know, I just gotta go." Ja'Marr's eyes go wide as he takes in this information. It's a scary revelation, and he can tell Joe's mind is running a million miles an hour because of it. He's always known the quarterback to be cool, he's called 'Joe Brrr' for a reason, but he can tell that guy's nowhere to be found right now. The wide receiver can see that his friend is on edge and is wracked with anxiety.
"Go. Go to her and make sure everything's okay. I'll handle the press conference, don't worry about anything else besides getting home. Call me as soon as you can and let me know everything's alright." Ja'Marr pats the blonde's arm, all but ushering him on his way. Joe nods, appreciating his friend's help, but before he can take off, Ja'Marr speaks up again. "Be safe, Joe."
"I will. Thanks, bro, I appreciate you," Joe says with a nod before rushing out of the locker room.
*****
To say it was hard to get out of Paycor Stadium would be an understatement. Everywhere Joe turned it felt like he was met with someone or something that would hold him back from getting to you. Fellow teammates would want to stop and chat or fans would call out to him from the hallway as he rushed past them. Although usually he wouldn't think twice about stopping, now was not one of those times.
Eventually, he did make it out and into the garage. He'd never been as thankful for the player only parking lot as he was in that moment, his ability to get back onto the highway much easier than if he was stuck in the regular lot. The thought of what it would've been like trying to get out over there, and how much more time he would've lost, is too much for even Joe Burrow to handle.
Now, as Joe speeds down the highway and probably breaks countless traffic laws, he can't help his tightening grip on the steering wheel. His eyes keep flicking to the clock on the dashboard, his already unyielding anxiety spiking every time yet another minute passes.
Since he's left the stadium, Joe's tried calling you numerous times, each call going straight to voicemail. Even though you don't pick up, your boyfriend can still hear your voice replaying in his mind over and over again. He can hear you tell him you love him followed by a scream so terrifying, it shakes him to his very core.
Joe can't stand the fact someone has scared you that much. Can't stand the fact he isn't there for you in a way he's always promised you he would be. The quarterback is aware things like this happen, especially to people like him, but never in his wildest dreams did he think you would ever be put in a position like this. Sure you knew what you were taking on becoming his girlfriend, but you never agreed to putting your life at risk. Joe hates the reality that that's exactly what's happened.
Although his drive home isn't that long to begin with, Joe still manages to cut the arrival time in half, his leg bouncing impatiently as he waits for the gates to his subdivision to open up.
Holding on to some shred of hope that maybe, just maybe you'll pick up the phone, Joe uses the dial assist on his car to call you again. The phone starts ringing, the monotone drone of the ring practically shaking Joe's car as he turns up the volume, not wanting to miss the click of you picking up the phone. With each passing ring his chest tightens. Breathing seems impossible as the winding roads to his house seem more endless than they ever have before.
"Something's happened—"
"I-I'm scared, Joey"
"You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, Joe"
"I love you—"
A click., a glimmer of hope, and then—voicemail. Again.
A frustrated groan—almost a cry—leaves Joe's lips, his nervousness and desperation only growing. His mind reeling with every worst-case scenario imaginable.
Did they find you? Are you hurt? Did they take you? Or worse, did they...oh, God.
Shaking his head, the blonde tries to steady his breathing. Thinking like this will get him nowhere. He just has to focus on getting to the house and finding out what's exactly happened.
Begrudgingly, Joe steps on the brake. Police lights start to become visible as he pulls onto his street, and Joe can feel his pulse skip a couple beats as he notices the ambulance up ahead as well.
Fear creeps into the back of his mind as he pulls into the driveway. Joe can't help the panic he feels as he thinks about why an ambulance would be necessary. Those worst-case scenarios start to seep back into the forefront of his mind as the quarterback throws his car into park and immediately rushes out of it.
Blue eyes scan the ambulance, but are unable to locate the girl in question. A medic is rummaging in the back of the truck, but other than that there's no one inside as far as he can tell.
Good, Joe thinks. Maybe it's just a precaution. She's not actually hurt.
Even though his mind is able to assure himself of this, Joe's heart refuses to believe it. He can feel it still beating erratically in his chest as he rushes to the open front door, police officers surrounding the area.
As Joe reaches the front door and begins to push past all the officers, he's met with resistance.
"Woah, there! Sir this is an active crime—" Joe doesn't even give the police officer a chance to finish his sentence, instantly pushing back as the officer attempts to prevent him from entering.
"This is my house!" Joe snaps, his patience wearing extremely thin. The officer has a flash of recognition cross his face before giving into Joe's resistance and moving out of the way as he pushes past him. Not like he had much of a choice, though. Joe wouldn't even let an army come between him and making sure you're okay right now.
Stepping through the front door, Joe's immediately met with disarray. Shards of glass are scattered across the floor and furniture along with other miscellaneous items litter the area as well.
The picture of what happened is pretty easy to paint, and that only makes Joe feel worse. He can't believe this has happened. He can't even imagine the stress you must've been under, the stress you must still be under.
Joe's chest feels tight, tears beginning to form in his eyes. His hands start to shake—something that rarely happens—and he abruptly starts looking around the room, taking in every face as he passes over them.
Officer after officer moves past him. Joe doesn't even care about the looks they give him as they realize who he is. None of it matters; not the articles he knows will come out after this, not the questions he knows will be thrown at him during his Wednesday press conference—none of it. As he rushes further into the house, Joe realizes nothing is as important as—
You.
It takes only a second for Joe's world to finally stop spinning. For the air to finally return to his lungs and his ability to breathe to be restored. It takes only a second of seeing you standing in the middle of the living room talking to a police officer to have Joe start running towards you, the need to wrap you in his arms stronger than ever before.
*****
"Y/N!" Your boyfriend's voice breaks through your racing thoughts as you recount your experience to the police officer before you.
You've been able to do a pretty good job with keeping yourself together since the police came to the house and led you out of Joe's office earlier. But the moment your eyes lock with those familiar blue ones, everything you felt while the break-in was happening comes rushing back.
The fear, the anxiety, the thought of possibly never seeing your boyfriend again comes at you full force, and suddenly you can't picture yourself doing anything else in this moment besides holding onto the blonde and never letting go.
"Joe!" You cry, fresh tears beginning to stream down your face as you practically leap towards the Bengals quarterback.
The strength in Joe's arms as they wrap around you instantly makes you feel safe, more grounded. Even having been in a room full of trained officers for the past half hour has nothing on the effect Joe's presence has on you.
Your tears seep into the fabric of your boyfriend's shirt, but Joe pays no mind to it. All he cares about is the fact he finally has you in his arms, that he's no longer suffocating with anxiety over the thought of whether you're safe or not. Now, your familiar scent fills his nose and he practically shudders over it, tears slipping from his own eyes at this point.
"What happened, baby? Tell me everything," Joe says as he pulls back slightly from you, cradling the back of your head with one of his hands. When your eyes trail up to meet his, he can still see the traces of fear in them.
Joe looks over your shoulder and can see the obvious entry point the burglars took. The glass window is nearly gone from the frame and it's clear from the state of the living room that these people had no care for the destruction they were causing. He immediately thinks that if they didn't care about the state they left things in, they certainly wouldn't care if they hurt someone in the process too, as long as they got what they wanted and got off free.
The thought boils Joe's blood. Even though it appears you weren't harmed, it doesn't change the fact it could've happened. It doesn't change the fact these people thought it was okay to break into his house and leave his girlfriend fearing for her life. Joe thinks back on when he walked up to his own front door and saw all those officers standing around, and the others he can see now milling about the house and doing nothing but poking and prodding at things.
Why is no one moving? Joe fumes inside his mind. They should be out there looking for these assholes!
As you open your mouth to start telling Joe everything that happened, he breaks away from your grip, a hard look on his face. You watch as he makes his way over to the officer you were just speaking to, and straight away you can tell this isn't gonna be good.
Quickly, you rush after the blonde, cringing as you hear him call out to the officer in a sharp tone, clearly wanting answers and wanting them now.
"What's going on here? My house just got broken into and my girlfriend just had her life at stake and it seems all anyone is doing is standing around! When are you guys gonna go out there and catch these people! You're wasting time!" Joe's cheeks are flushed, his frustration evident as he towers over the police officer. To anyone else he might look intimidating, but you know he's just upset and can tell that it's probably eating him up inside that he couldn't be there for you earlier, and that he can't really do anything to make sure these guys never come back again. Your heart breaks for him over it.
"Mr. Burrow, I know you're upset right now, but I can assure you we're going to do everything we can to find these guys. There are just protocols we have to follow—"
"Respectfully, I don't give a damn about the protocols! I just need you guys—" Stepping in between the two men, you press a hand to Joe's chest, cutting him off. The last thing you need is for him to get into it with an officer and end up in a cell right along with the burglars.
"Joe, it's fine! Drop it, please! Let's just go over there together and I'll tell you everything that happened, I promise," you plead, pulling gently on Joe's arm to try and move him away from the officer who is clearly losing his patience. Even though Joe is Cincinnati's Golden Boy, you doubt questioning the police department's authority would go over well.
Your boyfriend's blue eyes soften as they flicker from the officer's down to yours. He nods his head lightly after a beat and allows you to lead him away.
The police officer shakes his head but says nothing more before returning to his notes and begins speaking animatedly into his radio. You're grateful nothing comes from Joe's confrontation. You don't know what you'd do if you lost your boyfriend to a cop car in a time when you need him most.
As you and Joe huddle into a corner away from the hustle and bustle of the police force, you let out a breath as he reaches out and tenderly strokes your arm.
"I'm sorry, I know the last thing you need right now is to see me get arrested. I'm just so—" Joe lets out a groan, his anguish evident on his face and in his tone. His eyes are glossy once more as he looks down at you. "I just can't stand to see you scared, and I can't stand the fact this happened to you. If I could've traded places with you, I would've in a heartbeat."
"It's okay, Joe. I'm okay, I promise. I'm just shaken up, is all." Joe cups your face in his palms and you smile at the familiarity and comfort of it. "And hey, it's alright we couldn't switch places. I don't know how much help I would've been with trying to throw a ball fifty yards while multiple three hundred pound men came barreling towards me."
This gets a laugh out of Joe, and as you chuckle along with him, you find yourself feeling relieved. Relieved that you get to continue making jokes with him, relieved that you didn't lose this, relieved that you didn't lose him.
"I guess you're right about that one, sweetheart." Leaning down, Joe's forehead meets yours and you both bask in the warmth of each other. Letting out a breath, his next words come out almost as a whisper, "Please tell me what happened."
Your eyes flutter closed for the briefest of moments, reality settling back in as you realize this conversation needs to happen. Although you've already had it with the police, you need to have it again with Joe. He needs to know what happened.
Lifting your head, you begin to retell the story you know will live on with you for the rest of your life.
"I-I wanted to surprise you when you got home from your game tonight. I know we don't usually get together during the week, especially when it's a short one for you, but I missed you and thought it'd be nice considering it looked like you guys were gonna win." Joe feels like a weight has been re-added to his chest. He wishes so badly that that is what tonight would've consisted of. He couldn't think of a better way to celebrate a win than a night in with his girl. "I came in and put away the food I brought before heading upstairs to freshen up. I didn't notice anything out of the ordinary, didn't see anything, but when I was in the bathroom in your bedroom I heard a bang."
"I thought it was nothing, maybe a neighbor or an animal outside, I don't know. I didn't do anything, I waited a few minutes and then went downstairs. It was dark and I-I could barely see. I never saw them coming, I just—" Your voice goes out, your emotions overtaking you as you begin to see everything unfold in your mind. "I just went downstairs and all at once everything just happened. I heard the window shatter and saw people coming through it so I ran. I ran back upstairs and locked myself in your office and called 911. I was so scared, and all I wanted to do was hear your voice, so I hung up the phone with the operator and I called you even though I knew you wouldn't be able to answer."
Your heart starts beating rapidly just like it did when this all happened. You try to take a deep breath to calm yourself, but it comes out shaky. Gripping onto Joe's arms, you try to remind yourself those guys can't get to you anymore. They're gone and you're safe. Joe's here now and you know he won't let anything hurt you.
"At one point there were at least two guys upstairs with me and one of them started banging on the door." Joe's grip on you tightens, not enough to hurt you, just enough to let you know this retelling upsets him just as much as it upsets you. The quarterback thinks those guys should feel lucky he wasn't there, because there's no telling what he would've done if he saw the guys that did this to you. "They left and thankfully the police showed up after that. They brought me downstairs and I got checked out by the medics, but I'm fine, seriously. I've been here with them ever since. I wanted to call you once everything was settled, but my phone died. It was all just a lot."
Your shoulders sag in defeat. Reflecting on what happened—on how everything just spiraled one after another—leaves you in a state of disbelief. It's crazy to you how all this can happen, and how it can all happen so fast.
Staring at Joe, you feel a sense of guilt begin to creep in. You're standing in his home right now. In a place full of things he worked so hard for. Where he's supposed to feel safe and at peace. Your mind begins to swim with possibilities of different scenarios that could've gone down tonight instead of the one that actually did.
“Everything’s such a mess. The window, your stuff—“ You pull away from your boyfriend and look around, fully taking in the sight of the disaster that’s struck Joe’s house. Sure it’s all replaceable, but you can’t help but feel you could’ve prevented it if only you’d acted faster. “Oh God, Joe, I’m so sorry! When I heard the noises I shouldn’t have waited, I—“
Joe can see the wheels turning in your mind and not in a good way. It's obvious to him that you feel guilty about what happened even though you shouldn't. Joe thinks this is far from your fault. You're not the one who decided to break into someone else's house just for the hell of it. You did everything you could and even if you had called the police just a few minutes earlier, he highly doubts that would've prevented those guys from breaking in. If not here, then somewhere else, and Joe's sure about that.
“Hey, stop. None of this is your fault. I don’t care about any of that stuff. At the end of the day that’s all it is; a house and some material things." Joe gently takes your hand in his, bringing your attention back to him instead of the chaos surrounding you. "You’re my home, and all I care about is that you’re okay. I’m sorry you were alone when it happened. I wish I could’ve been here with you or that you were with me at the game, safe. I don’t know what I would’ve done if something happened to you. So don't worry about the house or the things in it. All I care about is you. I love you, Y/N.”
Tears spring to your eyes, but this time not ones of fear, anxiety, or even frustration. No, ones of love. Love for the man in front of you who, despite everything he's lost tonight, only cares about the fact he didn't lose you.
"I love you too, Joey," you whisper before standing up on your tip-toes to wrap your arms around his neck and hold him impossibly closer.
Joe rubs his hands up and down your back and you nearly melt at the feeling. You cup the nape of his neck and lightly scratch at the base of his hairline, knowing it's something that helps soothe him. You may have been the one to experience the burglary, but you know Joe was wracked with just as much anxiety and fear. You can only imagine how you would've felt if the roles were reversed.
Taking in a deep breath, you release it as you contemplate how long you'll be able to stay in this blissful state before reality comes creeping back in and you'll both be forced to confront the situation at hand.
Obviously, it's not long, because before you know it someone's clearing their throat behind you and you reluctantly let go of Joe to see who it is and what they want.
"Sorry to interrupt, Mr. Burrow, Ms. Y/L/N, but we'd like to begin making an itemized list of everything you both believe to have been taken now. That is, if you're both ready for that." You remember this officer from earlier. he's not the one you gave your statement to, but he was one of the first ones who showed up and made sure you were taken care of. He's kind and you appreciate him not wanting to cross any boundaries, making sure you and Joe are both ready before diving into what you're sure will be a long process.
Joe stands beside you, warm hand firmly grasped in yours. You tilt your head up towards him, and as you look into his pale blue eyes, you feel at ease. You feel like no matter what comes next while dealing with all of this, as long as you have Joe by your side, you'll be okay. And you have a feeling he feels much the same about you.
So, with a slight squeeze of your hand and a nod up at your boyfriend, you turn towards the police officer and say;
"We're ready."
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yakayla-withay · 9 months ago
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anyways!
i think i am very mental ill and emotionally damaged from just wanting someone to really want to be seen with
to act like they really like and love me in public
but i would have to show them instead of being surprised and thought of and put more actionable work into
i am not worth that much work to you
you are already too tired for this relationship
you already put in too much of whatever of yourself is here
and yet when we are together in front of people, it feels like me vs everyone including you in the room
you sink into everyone else in the room, you are less mine and more of just whatever the room feels like to you
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depresseddepot · 2 years ago
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oughhhghh where is that "don't trust anything you think abt your life past 9pm" post when you need it
#its ''feel like an alien'' hours once again#recently ive been trying to unmask a little bit but even that tiny bit is like. breaking the dam of how weird i am#ive barely scratched the surface and im already starting to get those Looks that i haven't gotten since middle school#i wouldn't mind masking at work if i could just figure out how the hell to correctly bounce back questions#like the 10 year old in me gets so desperate to talk about herself in a genuine fashion that i can't stop myself#unless i am 100% masking. like even a little bit less and i overshare like an idiot#i dont really care to learn body language yet but i need to know how to refuse to answer personal questions#without making it weird#like allistics seem to just Know how to carefully roll with those questions without actually saying anything#''you should be genuine bc you'll feel better'' there is very little that makes me feel worse than oversharing at work#i work with conservatives baby. a little oversharing here and there leads to them finding shit out abt me that they WILL use against me#and i do not trust myself enough to not actually tell them in the moment because i can't fucking lie to save my life#when someone asks me a genuine question i just can't do anything other than offer a genuine answer#and i want to stop ! i dont feel comfortable sharing these things about myself so why wont i shut my fucking mouth!!!!!#i need to learn to let people simmer in silence. i am always too focused w filling the silence to prevent people seeing how weird i am#its always another little fucking quip with me. i can never just shut my fucking mouth#sorry#vent
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inmirova · 5 months ago
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"it's easier to leave an abusive situation than it is to stop an abuser" :^( but it's not easy :^(
#repeating patterns repeating patterns repeating patterns repeating patterns#im not unsafe btw just. :^) scared :^)#tired.#starting to stop walking on eggshells kind of. in a cowardly way. like responding some of my real thoughts but at 4am#i want to scream. im not like that but i want to yell and tell her to leave me alone forever and i just want to be able to rest !#and to not be afraid. i want to move. i want to drop off the face of the earth. i want to go to bed. i want to stay awake and on guard.#idk. im tired. im so tired and i want it to stop. it's not even a big deal.#the thinly veiled insults bother me more than anything else. insult sandwich on compliment bread.#im so pretty im so stupid im so funny. im smart im too insecure im beautiful. im the most interesting person she knows im evil im talented#it's not even the worst thing it just pisses me off so much. do you think this is helpful to say? do you think this is normal?#do you think you'll get what you want insulting and belittling me as long as you tell me you think im attractive?#it's always how pretty i am. like some superficial bullshit is going to make up for an insult or make the insult disappear#and everyone else gets to leave but if i leave she'll die and it'll be all my fault and this is just like x y or z#and didnt i know she almost experienced trauma as a child but didnt? and how that effects her?#fuck. i hope she sees this tbh. how fucking insulting to see something someone's experienced and say that couldve maybe happened to me#but the person who couldve done it lives in another country and never came here.#what the fuck. what the fuck.#so it didnt happen to you? you cant lay claim to it at all? yet you think you understand me or that even if it did happen it's all the same#im going to lose my mind. im so. fucking. over it. but im a coward and i dont want her to die so ill grin and bear it.#and she'll tear out all my skin and ask if it's a little too much and ill say it's fine and she'll say im so gorgeous but i'm disgusting#but at least im kind. and ill say okay. because if i say anything else it's a threat on her fucking life.#tbh im only posting this now bc i know no one will likely read it. perpetual coward when it comes to this shit#because if i tell someone the full extent they'll ask why i didn't leave sooner. but i did!#i left and i got bombarded and overwhelmed and i was so tired of being scared of running into her everywhere#and i just. eased back in. and said it would be less this time. and it is so much more. it is so much worse.#ive lived in that fear before and i was so tired of it. it was a big reason i moved so far for college. and i cant just run away#so this seemed better. but it's so much worse. id rather hide every day of my life. keep an eye out everywhere and run away.#it wasnt so bad really. it was tedious and nauseating and i only ever explained it to one person. but it wasnt impossible.#this is much closer to impossible. this is soul crushing every day. and the things she does arent even as bad i dont think#it just doesnt stop. at least in high school i eventually got it to stop. i just had to be avoidant. this. wont stop.
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warthogreporter · 6 months ago
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A second look at the human fucker community on monster tumblr
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🧜‍♀️ Hermaid Follow
After a while you start to notice some trends in how people talk about fucking their hoomans
Vampires: This is Brother Reginald Regicus Regicum who I slowly corrupted and tempted with earthly desires across several long years until he became a creature of the night like myself. We're throwing his one year vampirization party in a month, here's the invite, if you don't come it's a personal insult, to me.
Orcs: This is Himby the Himbo who I snagged in some raid I did because I got bored on my way to the grocery store. It's funny when I make him wear cat ears.
🐻 Beard-Toucher Follow
Demons: These are Sir Good and Sir Goody. I make them wear matching collars because of how they were all but boyfriends before I enthralled them with my dark magic. You noticed their matching collars right?
Werewolves: You'll never believe this, but my human Stucky, who used to be called Lady Stuck Up, was actually a repressed and stuck up person before I helped her embrace her wild side TM.
🐍 Scaled-Scales-Scaling-Scales Follow
Naga: ...Anyway after spending 400,000 years praying I finally met the human who is the love of my life and we recited mantras together, after 200,000,000 years of this we began to *blushes* hold hands and then the gods...
Other kinds of dragons: This is King Dragonslayer the Unfucked. I use him as a display stand for my jewels when not fucking him.
(164,597 Notes)
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🐙 WetterThanYou Follow
Showing the humans parts of their world they've never seen (the depths).
(9,846 Notes)
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🐎 Seventaur-deactivated20230527 Follow
Man humans really are such pathetic creatures
🐎 Seventaur-deactivated20230527 Follow
Stop reblogging this as a human fucker post! I advocate for exterminating those pests! It's literally in my bio! Human Fuckers DNI!
👿PazuzuOfficial✅ Follow
Hey OP we need to 'talk' IRL. Don't bother turning on your location, I already know it.
(369 Notes)
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🐺 HereWolf Follow
Seeing elves in human fucker communities is always such a "bro thinks he's on the team" moment. Oh yeah you're so different from humans with your pointy ears and... oh right that's literally it.
🛣️Elf-Hater Follow
Elves are like humans but lame and pretentious, even lame and pretentious humans are better. Eying a 'human' only to notice pointy ears is like biting into a blueberry muffin thinking it's a chocolate muffin, if blueberries tasted like shit.
🧝Elfeven Follow
🥺
🪓Orcasionally-Really-Cranky Follow
If it makes you feel better I fuck both humans and elves, just got back from a raid where I scored plenty of elves to make into my obedient little whores.
🧝Elfeven Follow
That doesn't make me feel better.
(685,734 Notes)
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🦅Feathery Follow
Finally going to an actual human town. What do human eggs look like? Don't want to cause any problems by mistake.
🦋 Gregory-Grigori Follow
People on this webbed site will really just say anything about hoomans huh?
🐂 No-Yournotaur Follow
OP, humans don't lay eggs. It's weird that you thought they did. They're mammals.
🦅Feathery Follow
I thought they were like platypi no need to get up my ass about this
🐂 No-Yournotaur Follow
Okay you know what fair.
(5,873 Notes)
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🦋 Gregory-Grigori Follow
I'd say good morning, but I didn't wake up with a beautiful human on each side of me so actually it was yet another mid morning.
(4,384 Notes)
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Click here for part 1 and here for part 3 and here for the Christmas special
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youraverageaemondsimp · 7 months ago
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Lust for love. // Aemond Targaryen x Wife!Reader.
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Summary: Aemond's life has always been a bitter and sour one, the only sweet thing in his life was you, his wife, perhaps too sweet for his liking, yet he neglected you in the past but a series of events lead you both together into love.
WARNINGS: mdni, smut, unprotected p in v, cunnilingus, interrupted orgasm, horny aemond, martial duties, clit stimulation, tiddy succin, body worship(?), gentle and kind aemond but he gets rough during sex, + not proofread, lmk if I missed any!
WC: 2.9k
A/N: divider credits @cafekitsune
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The cold breeze brushed against Aemond's face as he walked hastily towards your chamber, his boots clacking against the stone floor heavily while his heart banged in his ribcage.
He was feeling light headed, unable to form any thoughts and only the words of the maester rang inside his skull from earlier. ‘Your lady wife seems to be sick’ he had informed him and those mere words were enough to make Aemond spurt up from his chair in the meeting room and immediately rush towards you.
Aemond, frankly, did not know why he was feeling anxious at the information that you were sick, he did not even like you much and only merely married you for the connections and benefits your family provided.
You were just a mere duty to him, so when did he start caring about you?
He stood in front of your chamber door waiting anxiously as the guard gave him a bow before he opened the door, the mental hinges creaking as it slowly moved. He steps inside hurriedly and immediately lets out a sigh of relief when he sees you sitting up. You just stare at him confused.
“Husband? What are you doing here?” The tone of your voice indicated surprise, because Aemond had never visited your chambers even once since the beginning of your marriage and only called you to his chamber when he wanted to consummate.
“I had been informed by the maester that you were sick.” He replies nonchalantly, tone betraying the true feelings that were whirling on the inside. He wanted to get close to you, embrace you.
“I'm not with child.” You reluctantly tell him while looking down, suddenly feeling as though you are a disappointment. It felt humiliating to tell him that, especially when he came all the way to your chambers, he probably expected that you would be with a child.
Except that was not the case.
Aemond was confused on why you were bringing up that topic now, but then it clicked in his head and he cleared his throat, grabbing your attention before shaking his head, “Oh no, wife, I wasn't here because of that.. I was worried.” He admits and your eyes widen in shock.
Worried for you?
For as long as you can remember Aemond never seemed the type to show affection or concern for anyone, perhaps it was due to his past grievances, you had only heard about his eye through rumours, he never opened up to you about anything. You were a duty for him, someone he needs a legitimate heir from; because it is not as though he doesn’t have whores to seek pleasure from so what is the use of you? ; or at least that is what you had assumed and questioned.
But to Aemond, you were his sweet gentle wife, he was afraid of hurting you, in his vision, you were like a white swan, pure, elegant and graceful, he did not want to scare you lest you fly away from him. He did not know when he started perceiving you in this way, but as time went on, he had developed quite a soft spot for you.
“My apologies, Lord husband, I did not intend to worry you.” You apologised, he shook his head gently. “No need to apologise, how are you feeling now?” He questions and you simply blink at him, “I'm well, better than before.” You reply with a soft smile. Aemond's lip curved upwards slightly as he nodded, “Very well.” He says in a dismissive tone.
Awkward silence falls between you both as you look down, he clears his throat before speaking, “If you'll pardon me- I have to—”
“Would you like to take a walk with me?” The question leaves your mouth in a hurry before you could stop it, a desperate attempt at clinging onto this fleeting moment of affection. He seems slightly taken aback but he nods his head, “I'd love to.” He replies and you nod, stepping in his direction and standing next to him. “Shall we go?” You inquire, “Yes, wife.” He answers and you wait for him to take the first step, which he does; and soon you follow him out of the room.
You both stroll down the garden, admiring the scenery, the breeze was gentle today, and the weather seemed perfect, Aemond linked your arm in his, holding you close to him.
Your skin was soft to the touch and it drove him insane, he couldn't help but stare at the way your breasts pushed up against the material of your dress, he never really properly fucked you like you deserve.
Yet now, he just wants nothing to do but push you against the castle wall and fuck you relentlessly in the garden. Aemond realised that he never heard you moan, or show any type of reaction when he consummated with you.
He wondered how your soft voice would shriek in pleasure, calling out his name in pleasure, how you'd cling so tightly to him, he wished he could witness such a sight. He wished he hadn't gone to whores to receive pleasure while he left his wife dry. He missed out on a lot of things due to his decisions.
He mentally made a note to stop visiting brothels as it would taint your honour, he could simply seek the same pleasure from you. He became more bothered as his imagination went wild.
“... husband…? husband…!” He snaps out of his imagination, looking at your confused expression, “Y-Yes? Please excuse me, I was lost in thought.” He apologises and you give him a soft smile, “You were saying something?” He asks and you nod, “I was thinking about; well; if you excuse my rudeness, I realised we don't know much about each other.” You truthfully tell him.
Aemond furrows his brows in question, “What do you mean by that wife?”
“I want to get to know you, husband.” You stare at him in the eye and his eye widens slightly, and just then he recalls the memory of Aegon's words.
“That woman in the brothel knows more about you than your own wife, don't you find it amusing?” He was taunting Aemond, and at that time Aemond ignored those words, but now that you've openly admitted that you don't know him much made his heart shatter.
“Of course wife, what do you wanna know?” He decides to let his guard down, ready to tell you whatever you ask for. “Everything.” You reply, biting your lip anxiously, your hand travels up to his face, caressing his cheek before you trail your thumb down his scar. He knew what that implication meant and he smiles at you in a gentle manner, his own hand coming up to grab your wrist.
“Of course.”
Days pass by just like that, your marriage with Aemond had improved tremendously after your little effort to get to know him better, you felt bad for him when he began to reveal such vulnerable things, yet you never judged him.
He had shown you all of his vulnerability so openly, from the matter of his eye to everything else. You listened in silence, and he appreciated that.
As Aemond grew more comfortable, he began to show his emotional side, which included both his vulnerability and anger. He would utter treasonous things about his own brother.
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This night was one of those cold nights, the cold breeze flew into the martial chambers you were waiting in, the maids prepared you for the consummation as they do, you and Aemond consummate according to your moon cycle since your only duty is to provide him with a heir.
And besides, he probably did not want to lay with you in an intimate manner, or for pleasure. You felt insecure because of that.
You were scared that after all this progress, everything would return to the same way it was before because of this night, you doubted that it would happen but your thoughts plagued you.
You winced when you felt the maid tug at a hair strand accidentally, “Sorry my lady.” She apologises to you, “It is alright.” You respond softly, you stare at your own reflection in the mirror, eyes trailing down your features.
The door to the chamber opens, and Aemond strides in hurriedly, the maids quickly finish fixing you up and leave the room immediately, you get up from your seat and turn around to see Aemond undoing his clothes.
“Let me help you.” You offered, usually he would decline and continue to undress himself, and you expected that again, but his actions shocked you.
He immediately dropped his hands to the side and turned to look at you, waiting for you to walk over to him and help him. You blinked rapidly before rushing over to where he stood before you stood in front of him.
Your hands immediately began to work on removing his vest, your fingers delicately undid the loops, you were too focused on the job that you failed to notice Aemond's piercing gaze. He watched with intent as you worked on removing his clothes, his eye taking in your form. His breeches felt tight.
You pushed his coat off his shoulders and peeled away the vest, revealing his tunic beneath the layers, his garments fell to the ground with a shuffle, you stepped back, leaving him in his undergarments.
He grabbed the hem of his tunic before he pulled it off and then began to undo his breeches, untying the strings. You took that as a gesture to lay down on the bed, facing up.
This is what you did when you both consummated before, you would lay down, he would spread your legs, insert himself, finish and leave.
You expected that to be the case, but you were surprised when climbed on top of you, his face right in front of yours, platinum locks curtaining around you. He stared at your lips for a moment before he leaned in, capturing your lips with his.
You were surprised, and didn't know what to do, so you stayed still, but he bit your lip, indicating his disappointment at your freezing up, and so you immediately tried to mimic his movements.
Your lips danced against his, yet it couldn't match the fervent passion he moved with, it was desperate, intimate and most importantly, filled with love and lust.
All your prior insecurities melted away under his warm lips which were filled with desire and want, he wanted you, he seeked you out.
You both pulled away to catch your breaths, his lips were glossy from your saliva and slightly swollen. Your heart was pounding loudly in your chest.
Aemond moved your night off your shoulder before ripping it apart, revealing your breasts which you immediately covered out of instinct. But he gently grabbed your wrists and pinned your hands to the side of your head.
He leaned down, tracing kissing down your jawline, to your neck and to the soft flesh of your chest. His hot breath against your bud made you shiver in delight.
He hooked his tongue on your hardened nipple before engulfing it with his mouth, you let out a squeal of surprise at his actions but you didn't stop him.
He suckled on it gently, using his teeth to trap the bud in between before licking it with his tongue, he grunted in delight, his grip loosening one of your hands, freeing it from his hold.
He grabbed your unoccupied breast with his now free hand, giving it soft squeezes and playing with the bud, rolling and pinching it. You were new to this, not having any understanding of what was happening, after all, you've only read about it, never experienced such intimate acts yourself.
You rubbed your thighs together, trying to ease the ache that was forming in between them, you realised how sticky the area felt, and how it made it difficult for the friction of rubbing to work.
He notices this, lets go of your breast with a pop, he smirks before he rises off from you and settles in between your legs, this was the position you were more used to.
He spreads your legs wide apart, pulling up your nightgown, revealing all of you. He pressed his thumb against your clit which made your breath, you stared at him confused until you felt him rub small circles upon it.
Your body felt pangs of delightful stimulation, you couldn't help but enjoy the feeling, all of this was foreign to you. Aemond takes a deep breath before he closes in on your cunt, before licking a stripe upwards to your clit. You jolt from the sudden pleasure.
Aemond wrapped his lips around it, sucking on the bud slowly, you whined, grabbing his head for support as his mouth worked wonders down there. You tasted absolutely divine to Aemond, your essence trailing down his cheek as your body produced so much of it. You whimpered, thrashing around lightly as his warm tongue flickered with your bud.
Aemond's tongue swirled around your clit before he captured it with his mouth once again; “Oh! Yes!” You moaned, throwing your head back in pleasure when you felt him nibble on your bud. An unfamiliar feeling of warmth rose in your lower abdomen, you felt as if there was a fire inside you, waiting to combust any moment.
Just when you feet the flames beginning to erupt, Aemond stops his manoeuvres, putting out the fire, you furrowed your brows in confusion, wondering why he stopped.
But when you looked at Aemond, he seemed like an entirely different being at that moment, he had risen up back to his haunches again taking deep breaths almost as if he was trying to contain himself.
He was.
He had never felt such an overwhelming of desire in his body, every time he touched you; his mind scrambled into pieces, he wanted to fuck you so badly.
“Aemond?” You call out softly, confused, wondering if he was disappointed by your behaviour but it seems to snap him out of his daze and he stares at you. “I apologise; I'm finding it hard to control myself.” He admits his thoughts.
“Then don't.”
Aemond swore he heard you wrong.
“What?” He questions you.
“Don't try to Aemond, Don't hold yourself back, I want this, I want you.” You admit shyly.
The atmosphere fell silent for a second and you could feel the awkwardness from your own words beginning to sink in, that was until Aemond moved suddenly.
You shrieked as he pulled your hips onto his lap, wasting no time in inserting himself, you gasped at the sudden stretch, feeling yourself become full of him. You grabbed onto his shoulders for support.
He held your waist tightly, grabbing onto your hips for leverage as he began to move, thrusting himself in and out.
This was a movement you were familiar with, yet somehow it still feels new because of the strange sensation, it felt more intimate and passionate, his thrusts held meaning and it was as if every time he pushed inside you; he was reaffirming his love and desire for you.
He pushed you into the mattress, grabbing your legs and shoving them to your chest as he thrusted hard, his skin slapped against yours loudly, the room echoing the noises.
You threw your head back at the sensation, and you felt the fire in your stomach rekindle and you couldn't help but desperately chase it. “Ah, right there.” You moaned, feeling him hit a sweet spot inside you that fueled the fire in you, you gasped for air as every thrust of his knocked it out of your lungs. “You feel so good, you're driving me insane, wife.” Aemond grunts, his thrusts never once faltering.
Everything about this night together was very different from the previous ones, Aemond had never felt this good and neither have you, he regrets not trying to get to know you earlier. He felt like he was in heaven with the way you clenched around him.
He felt his high approaching, and he desperately ran after it thrusting deeper inside as he groaned and moaned.
Your body jolted up and down the bed and you felt the fire beginning to spread out slowly, you closed your eyes, when you felt the fire suddenly go out, you were confused but as Aemond thrusted one more time it erupted in your body like volcano, coursing through your veins and to your mind.
You moaned loudly, grabbing the sheets and arching your back as your eyes rolled to the back of your head at the intensity, you have never felt this way before.
Your vision went completely white before you could see once again, you felt Aemond finish inside you, his cocking twitching as he spurted his seed deep inside you.
“Seven hells.” He groans, riding his orgasm off, you watch as he clenches his eye shut taking deep breaths.
He looked so ethereal.
He immediately falls down next to you, catching his breath, he pulls you close and kisses you on the forehead, “You did so well for me.” He praises you, and you blush shyly.
Neither of you moved from the bed, having no intention to.
Typically Aemond would leave the room right after.
Yet he didn't.
He was stroking your shoulder gently as you dozed off, head resting on his shoulder.
He looks at your closed eyelids and thinks you're asleep.
“I love you.” He confesses, realising his true feelings.
Your lips quirk up into a smile before you open your eyes slightly.
“I love you too.”
You then doze off into slumber immediately, Aemond's heart picks up its pace, embarrassed and shy that you had heard him, but your response made him smile.
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I...don't know why the order of my tags fucked up, but I fixed them. Hopefully.
I feel like in the rush of “throw out etiquette who cares what fork you use or who gets introduced first” we actually lost a lot of social scripts that the younger generations are floundering without.
#I mean...I started ghosting dates after far too men didn't take the above or similar for an answer#and unfortunately in dating situations men will and do capitalize on anything they can#etiquette's got to go both ways or it's not helpful at all#“I enjoyed your company”? absolutely they would jump on that#they would want to know why no spark if you enjoyed their company#maybe we can try again#or they'll try to make you give a reason for why you didn't feel a spark#maybe you'll feel a spark if you give him another chance#just wasn't worth it after a while#I think a better example is “my deepest condolences” and “sorry for your loss” when someone loses a loved one#because in that situation it's hard to know what to say at all#and it's a script sure but it conveys you at least cared enough to say something#“bless you” for a sneeze#no you don't literally think they have demons but you're showing concern as sneezing is a sign of illness or allergy#“nice to meet you” “Happy Birthday” “congratulations” “I wish you well” “Happy Anniversary” “good morning” “good day to you” “good evening”#“good night” “get home safely” “I'm home safe and sound” “sleep well“ ”thank you“ ”you're welcome“ ”thank you for having me#“you're welcome any time” “get well soon” “enjoy your trip” “hope you have a good time” “have a good day”#“can I get you something to eat or drink?”#“how are you?” “how are the kids?” “how is your mother/other loved one?”#“I'm a bit tired I'm going to head out early but it was lovely to see you#“sorry but I'm not up to it today; maybe another time?”#etc.
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tojigasm · 7 months ago
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i just need to be idk, babied by logan, even though he knows that twenty something isnt a baby, hes showing you how to smoke properly, your sitting on his lap and taking sips of his drink, he lets you lay your head in his lap and cuddles up to him at night with ur cheek against his stomach and he just like, takes care of you? like he pets and humours and tolerates and when ur fucking hes so caring, stroking hair and kissing ur cheeks and forehead ur honour i want him so bad
And you get it soooo fucking bad because the idea of him being so paternal with you is something that just rots me to my coreee you guys. And there's a semblance of casual dominance about it that just makes me sob.
He's in the middle of fucking you. His chest pressed to your back, his skin flush to your own as he stands curved over you on your hands and knees on his bed. He keeps an arm wrapped around your chest, keeping you upright as he rolls his hips into, pressing a long kiss to the back of your head.
You'll be at the counter in the kitchen late at night, working on whatever when he wanders into the room in a grey hoodie and sweats. He makes his way to lean against the countertop, peering over at your notes. "Y'need anything, baby?" He'll eventually ask, running his knuckles over your forearm as you continue to write. "Mm, maybe water," you say, almost jumping out of your seat before you're being pushed back into the leather cushioning of the chair. "Let me do it fr'ya, sweetheart." And you don't get your glass of water until after he's "secretly" stolen a sip. He stands next to your seat at the counter until you're all done.
He's the first time you experience smoking. The smell of tobacco is heavy in the air while he sits on the front porch of the mansion. You've always been one to try new things and Logans never been one to deny you almost anything and so of course he holds the blunt of the cigar to your soft lips and lights the tobacco while you look all pretty fr'him. Takes you a couple tries and a few lessons in watching Logan easily breathe in the smokey tar, but you catch it eventually, earning a "atta' girl." From Logan.
Has you sit in his lap during movie nights at the mansion while he nurses a bottle of Jack Daniel's. He keeps a hand wrapped around your hip and the other on the neck of the bottle. Ever so often, you'll motion towards the bottle, and Logan'll hold you by the chin and tilt the bottle to your lips only for a second before pulling it away. You try to reach for it back, and he's pushing your hand away with a "C'mon, kid, that's enough." And you better not argue, it'll start an hour long discussion on how he knows best.
Or how the two of you will be lying on the couch after finishing a movie. You're resting against his chest as he runs the tips of his fingers up and down your back softly. And he'll just start giving you quick pecks here and there over your cheeks and on the tip of your nose and your forehead and chin before pulling back to look you over. He'll soothe the palm of his hand over the soft apple of your cheek, whispering softly "Yr'my baby, huh."
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missdynamighttt · 2 months ago
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bf! katsuki trying to convince his girlfriend to go on a date with him but you're lazy.
you were stretched out on the couch, lazily scrolling through your phone as the sun began to set.
meanwhile, katsuki was pacing in the living room, looking restless. he had been talking for the past ten minutes about going out to a new restaurant in town, but you weren't really interested.
you were perfectly content in his shirt, wrapped in the comfort of your blanket, and enjoying the quiet.
"sweets, you seriously don't wanna go out tonight?" katsuki asked, his eyebrow raised in a way that made it obvious he wasn't pleased with the lack of enthusiasm.
you glanced up at him, blinking, trying not to show how amused you are to see him like this. "maybe. kind of like it here. it's cozy, y'know?"
katsuki let out a dramatic sigh, running a hand through his hair. he can't go out alone. it was gonna be boring for him. not to mention annoying. since you were the one that kept the paparazzi at bay, so his ranks don't go too down. "just go out with me for once, woman, goddamn."
"aww, katsuki. how about this—if you pay me $500, i'll go out with you. how about that?"
you grinned, thinking: surely, you'll just stay here the whole night. watch him sulk a bit more before he cuddles up to you, have the same leftovers, maybe some sex. it was gonna be a boring, but easy night.
but clearly, you were wrong.
katsuki blinked, his face unreadable for a moment. then, without missing a beat, he reached into his wallet and pulled out a crisp stack of bills, handing you exactly $500.
your eyes went wide, jaw nearly hitting the floor. "what—wait! katsuki, i was joking! i didn’t actually expect you to—" you fumbled with the money in your hands, feeling a sudden rush of panic.
"i knew you were joking, idiot. but you said you’d go with me if i gave you the money," katsuki’s expression didn’t change. his tone was casual, like it was no big deal. "now quit being lazy and get ready for our date, sweets."
your brain short-circuited for a moment, scrambling to come up with some way to backtrack. "n-no, i was kidding! seriously, i didn't think you'd actually—"
you tried to shove the money back into his hands, but katsuki just shook his head with a small smirk, gently pushing the money back to you, holding your hand. "a deal’s a deal, sweets. don't back out now. thought you were better than that."
your cheeks flushed as you start to realize how serious he was. "this is insane! katsuki, i can't take this! i wasn’t serious! i was just trying to make a joke!"
"you said $500, didn't you?" katsuki said with a smug grin. he leaned back into the couch, crossing his arms behind his head. "its nothing. but, jokes aside, i’m still waiting for you to get ready."
you stared at the money in your hands, still unsure how to handle the situation. but you couldn’t help but laugh at the absurdity of it all.
"oh my god, fine," you scoffed, shaking your head in disbelief. "why do you wanna go on that date so badly?"
"tch, what can I say? i enjoy your company. even if you are lazy," he reached out to ruffle your hair, enjoying the way it disheveled under his touch. "besides, i've been wanting to take you somewhere nice for a while now."
you raise an eyebrow, tilting your head to one side. "really? why? we don't even have any special dates this month or anything."
katsuki rolled his eyes, as if the answer was obvious. his hand crawls to yours again, intertwining his fingers with yours. "because maybe.. i just wanna spoil my girl a little bit."
he sat up from the couch, squeezing your hand, gesturing you to follow him. "now, get your ass movin' before i have to drag you. wanna see you in that new dress i bought."
you sigh in exasperation, standing up, letting him lead you to the bedroom to change. "why do i even bother... you're just gonna rip it off of me anyway.."
"oh, you're adorable. its like you know me so well." he pulled you closer, pressing your against his body, his hand trailing up your back.
"now c'mere," he whispered, before leaning down to kiss your neck. "lemme help you get this off," he murmurs, spoiling your neck with open-mouthed kisses, his fingers tracing along your waist.
you chuckled, your breath hitching at his touch. "so long as i help you too..." you drawled, your hands drifting beneath his shirt.
"cheeky little brat," he scoffs, moving his lips to her jawline, holding onto the hem of your shirt, slowly yanking it up.
"you gonna be good for me, sweets?"
"mhm..."
"good."
and as painful as it was for katsuki, you did stay good. all you did was help each other out of your clothes. maybe sneaked in a few kisses here and there but didn't fool around, eventually dressing up into something formal before leaving.
and, yes. after treating you to one of the best dinners you've ever had, katsuki did rip off your dress. and made sure to remind you that he was the only one you were ever going on dates with.
‎‧₊˚✧[ it's me, kia! ]✧˚₊‧ 。゚•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• 。゚ ‎‧₊˚✧[ more of katsuki ! ]✧˚₊‧
⋆˚࿔ kia's note ˚⋆ wrote this up bc im rotting in bed lmaolmao also what do you guys feel about bridgerton au with katsuki... 🧍🏻‍♀️
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blastiebabe · 23 days ago
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hell yeah, you are spoiled
Bakugo Katsuki x Reader
You place your phone somewhere Katsuki cannot notice, and in an angle enough to be able to see most of the space in the bedroom you share with him.
You press record and come back to sitting in front of your vanity table to continue getting ready for your date night. You have seen this TikTok video and was inspired by it to put your phone on record to test how easily your boyfriend can be enraged for you.
Katsuki comes into your shared bedroom wearing only trouser pants that fits perfectly in his waist and accentuate his hips. Seeing him through your mirror, you can't help but realize how beautiful your boyfriend is. Katsuki heads to the closet looking for a shirt to wear.
"Love, what color are you wearing?" He asks as he look at his clothes on the rack.
You came back to your senses when you heard him speak, you have been so mesmerized by his beauty you almost forgot you were shooting.
"A black dress." You replied, looking at his direction. "Why?"
Katsuki looks back at you. "Just askin'." He says as he brings out a black polo and proceeds to sit on the bed.
You smirk at his response. "You wanna match colors with me or somethin'?" You tease him.
"Nah uh." You watch his condescending expression from his reflection on the mirror, his tone with an attitude while simultaneously having red ears. If you aren't planning anything, you weren't gonna let that slide, but since you are, you'll prioritize that.
You laugh at him and continued your make up, trying to find the right time to throw him the reason you started recording. He laid on the bed scrolling on his phone while waiting for you.
A minute passed, and you decided to finally tell him. "Love..." Katsuki immediately darted his eyes straight at you, waiting for the next thing you'll say.
"I have something I need to tell you but promise you won't be mad, okay?" You say calmly, acting yourself the hell out.
Katsuki immediately changed his position and sits up straight, eyes locked at you with a hint of worry in his face. "I ain't making any promises. What is it?"
You turn your back on the mirror and faced your boyfriend who has now a visibly worried face. You look at the floor and started playing with your fingers, making him worry more.
He stands up and sits on the edge of the bed in front of you. He is now near you and looking straight at you while you continue to look at the floor. "Princess, come on, you can tell me..."
"Well, I... I have read some comments on your social media page..." You look at Katsuki before you, you feel a hint of guilt when you saw how genuine his concern is. But you needed to continue.
"Mm hmm. And then?" He asks calmly.
"And... and some of your fans have left comments on the pictures you have uploaded of me."
"The hell did they say?" Katsuki asks now with a hint of irritation from his voice. This is going well. You thought.
"They said I am super spoiled." You say as sad as your acting can be.
You can clearly see the shift in Katsuki's eyes as you have muttered the last word, and his annoyance suddenly became a repressed laughter. He snorts as he covers his mouth.
You face him offended. Did he just laugh because other people called you spoiled? What the fuck?
Before you can even tell him off, he stands up, grabs his polo and started wearing it. "Love, you are spoiled." He says emphasizing on it.
"Katsuki, what the actual fuck?" You say having a hard time to process what he is saying.
He was about to button his polo when he suddenly sees you look so disappointed to what he just said. He clearly isn't making himself clear. He goes in front you, his right knee touching the floor as he looks straight into your eyes.
"My love, you honestly better be spoiled. Because I do spoil you, don't I?" Katsuki reaches for your hands. "So, hell yeah, you are spoiled. Because you are my princess and you deserve to get everything you want."
You can literally feel your annoyance slowly fading out. How can this man be so damn mean and sweet at the same fucking time?
Katsuki continues, "I know you spoil yourself even before we started dating, so it is my job to spoil you better than you spoil yourself." You can straight up see how genuine his words are through his eyes.
"And if I may I remind you, I am more than willing to spoil you 'til the ends of the Earth if it means I get to make you be happiest you've ever been." The man before you explain as he cups your cheek with his hand.
This conversation has turned into a completely different route from what you had expected. You had expected him to be furious about the comments, to be protective to not let other people talk like that about you. But turns out Katsuki has his own way to make you feel so damn good. This. This is the reason why Katsuki is different from all the other damned extras.
You can literally feel tears forming in your eyeballs. You cup both his cheeks with your hands, knowing anytime the damned tears might just fall. "You know I love you so damn much, right?"
You feel his smile in the palm of your hands. "Of course I do, my love." As soon as these words depart from his lips, you took the opportunity to have your lips met his.
Using your tongue to explain and make him remember how much you love him, and all the other things you feel for him that can never be explained by words alone.
Your hands travel on the nape of his neck bringing him closer to you as you deepen the kiss. You feel his hands at the small of your back as he let you lead.
When your lips parted, both of you are catching for your breath. You stare at Katsuki's mesmerizing face before you with his eyes glistening. "Now that was a perfect example of how you spoil me."
. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ thank u for reading! :>> . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ ༶•┈ by yel0ngkape ┈•༶ i accept requests, so feel free to reach out! ♡
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yougavememyopia · 1 month ago
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YOU WRITE CRYING MEN SO WELL ITS CRAZY ☹️🙏🙏 CAN WE PLS PLS PLS GET SMUT FOR CRYBABY!YANDERE OMG
Of course :) Pt.1. Pt.2.
Tags: oral (reader receiving), pillow humping, mommy kink (a bit obvious lol), poor communication
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Yandere crybaby, who, despite all of his perverted fantasies, would be shy to take things further with you. You'd have to coax it out of him with gentle reassurance. Petting the top of his head, kissing his pouty lips, nibbling on his neck. Slowly drawing lewd whimpers and whines from him. Slowly making him rock hard for you.
But then, at the last frustrating second, where you start to take off his shirt, he'd stop you. Embarrassment with a mix of insecurity in his eyes. Choked up tears and weak excuses muttered from his lips. Making your heart flutter at the sight of beet-redded face. Your fingers wiped his cheek, his lips planting kisses against your palm in return. Taking a few seconds to calm down his breathing, he bore his eyes into yours.
"We don't have to do anything you aren’t comfortable with, honey."
Your kind words eased him. But he knew you were bound to get tired of him being a pathetic crying mess. Truth was, he was scared— afraid that you'll hate him if you saw what was underneath his clothes. Afraid that if he didn't satisfy you, you would surely get rid of him. Leave him all alone to rot. Be with someone who was far better than him.
He couldn't let that happen.
"No, hic... You need relief. I-I can do this! I don't want you to be unsatisfied... Hic! I don't want you to go to anyone else for this. I want you to only look at me. Love me. Only me."
He got down between your legs. Rubbing your knees as he gulped, swallowing the saliva that wanted to spill. He felt sweaty. His heart drummed against his ears as tears fell from his eyes.
"Are you sure?" You confirmed it with him one last time, unable to say no to his cute, innocent face. He sniffled as he nodded enthusiastically. He wanted to do this. Not only because he could finally taste you, but also to make himself useful. He wanted to be good for you. He craved your approval; he needed it to survive.
He felt nervous. He had no idea what to do when you hesitantly pulled down your underwear. Just staring at your private...
His pants already creamed just by the sight of your bare pussy. He bit his lip hard, hiding a whimper from the shock of pleasure traveling up his body. Blinking and blinking, the gears in his head turning.
Your brows furrowed in concern. "I don't think we should, um..."
You lost your train of thought when his shaky breaths fanned your mound. An unsure tongue licking the length of your sensitive front. His eyes closed in ecstasy. Already overwhelmed enough by all his other senses. Your familiar smell, your divine taste, your dripping flesh— all driving him crazier. The noise you made caused his stomach to churn.
He pulled away, rubbing his cheek to the soft plush of your thigh instead. "Mmgh, f-feels too good. I..." His hand covered a mewl. "I love you so much..."
"I love you too, baby. But it's not a big deal if you—"
You were cut off again, this time by a surge of good shock shooting through you. He delved in, started to eat you out like a starved man. Licking, sucking, nibbling. His hands grabbing your hips so he could push his tongue further into your hole. Sinful squelching noises filled the room. His nose pressing against your clit with each thrust of his tongue. He wasn't holding back any longer, hiding his face between your thighs.
He slowly began to move his hips. His poor overstimulated cock rubbing against the couch. Aroused again with a fever. His whole body burned. His eyes rolled to the back of his head while he kept going. Movements only getting rougher and faster while you placed your hand on top of his head. Holding his head and bucking into his mouth, chasing release.
You had no idea he could be like this. His docile attitude replaced with something feral. He was moaning like he was in pain. Feeding on your juices to quench his thirst. His hips bumped against the furniture as if he wasn't capable of controlling it. Tears ruining his pretty face even more.
It was only a matter of time before you finished. Your back arching and your toes curling with a loud groan. "Ahhh... Fuck, fuck! Where did all that come from?"
"I-I just want you to be happy... Did I make you happy? Was I good? Are you gonna stay with me? You won't abandon me... right?!"
You sighed, a small smile forming on your face. He clearly had some things to work out. Always needing constant comfort; begging for you to own him, capture him, claim him as yours. He wished he could say the words without tearing up. Ask you to tie him down to your bed and just play with his hair.
He got comfortable with your body. Learning to use his slender fingers and even started to make eye contact when he kitten-licked your sensitive nub. Sobbing happy tears when you slowly stroked his hair. He felt enveloped by your love. Surrounded by you.
The liquid streamed down to his chin. Cries of joy vibrating against your heat while he worked harder to drive you to the edge. Half-lidded eyes staring up at yours as his fingers slid in and out of you rhythmically.
"Such a good boy, aren't you, hon? Yes. Yes, you are. You're my good boy. Ah, fuck, I'm gonna—"
Sometimes, the best way to help him calm down was to let him cuddle up to your chest. Sitting on your lap, head under your shirt— engulfed by your sweet sweet smell— lips moving around your breasts. Licking hot stripes around your areola, sucking on your nipple like a pacifier.
He'd start to get more greedy for your approval. Asking if he did a good job for a basic task, like folding his clothes and putting them away. Or if he was a good boy for not crying when you went to the bathroom. He was adorable— looking at you like a lost child, wanting for you to take care of him.
He couldn't bear to be apart from you for even a moment. Pleading and pleading for you to stay when you wanted to hang out with your friends. You pecked his lips, "Be good, baby. I'll be back in 2 hours. Promise."
He whimpered when you pulled away from him. Yet obeying your words as he should. Plopping down to your shared bed to sniff your scent from the sheets. 2 hours, he could do that.
He started weep pathetically. The droplets soaking your blanket. He cried over far more stupid things than this. A crybaby. That was really all he was. He took your pillow, hugging it tightly as if it would disappear at any moment. His eyes closed shut. Whispering, "Haah... I wish you were hugging me... I wish you were here..."
He tried to be a good boy. Tried to keep himself in check. Tried oh-so hard to stop thinking about it. But eventually, the problem in his pants started to hurt. One of his trembling legs dropped over your pillow, while he found the rewarding angle that gave him the most friction. His hand sneaked into his pocket to grab a pair of hidden underwear, there in case of... emergencies.
You came back to your room to retrieve a forgotten item. Just at the right time— catching him grinding against your pillow mindlessly. Your underwear pressed tightly against his nose as he inhaled and exhaled a wail. Moaning louder and more high-pitched than you've ever heard.
"Nghh... m-mommy... Why...? Why did you have to— hic— leave your poor babyboy....?"
You grinned. The newfound information was a treasure. You always wondered if he was into that title. Too timid to talk to you about things like that. He was just adorable. You could hear how close he was when his voice shook. When he chanted your name as if it would ease the pain. Brows crumpled, and sweat rolled down the skin of his forehead.
"Mommy..." His tongue darted out to lick the heavenly taste off the fabric of your panties. His hips rutted to the pillow until a sad, unsatisfying orgasm hit him. He cried miserably. Nose stuffed while he breathed out whimpers. Drool mixed with other liquids pooled down to splatter the pillow. An unusual angry huff coming from his lips. "Why aren't you here?!? Whywhywhywhy!"
Only if he had opened his eyes.
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suiana · 1 month ago
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yandere! childhood friend who still reminisces about your childhood together. yeah, the two of you may be grown now but he's been your day 1 and he just can't help but think about how you used to cling to him and adore him so much! he wishes you'd still do that but it is what it is. no matter how much he wishes otherwise.
yandere! childhood friend who did everything with you. yeah, that also includes practicing kisses. he's your first kiss, and he's never gonna let you forget that. you said you wanted to get better and who is he to refuse? he can't pass up such a prime opportunity! and it's not like he wants anyone else to take it. god no. that would be a tragedy.
"yeah, remember our kissing practices? hah, we were such kids back then!" he watches as you snicker, feeling a warm flush creep up his spine. god, of course he remembers. young and immature as you both were, you both learned together. that's all that really matters to him. "thanks to you, i can now makeout with my partners with ease. you're the best man." and has he told you how muchit infuriates him that you're using your experience to get with others? to please them with the mouth that once touched his? nah, he really can't stand for it. but he isn't allowed to say anything. he's just a childhood friend after all. not for long though.
yandere! childhood friend who wishes he would've accepted your offer to learn how to fuck as well. but no, he just had to be way too delusional back then and tell you to wait for the right one. he must've thought that you'd feel the same and confess then he'd court you slowly before getting to that stage... that never happened unfortunately. not yet at least. he'll make it happen.
yandere! childhood friend who's still a hopeless romantic at heart. a delusional one but a romantic nonetheless. he brings you out on "platonic dates" or whatever the fuck you like to call it, comfort you after your shitty excuse of a partner dumps you, and treats you like the deity that you are. you only deserve the best and he'll be there to provide. none of these losers can't treat you well. he can. he really hopes it'll help you see him as a potential boyfriend!
"i just," you blow your nose, tears streaming down your cheeks as your childhood friend rubs at your back tenderly. "don't know why he'd want to dumo me! we've been going strong for a year already! it's so out of the blue!" yeah, out of the blue huh... not really out of the blue for someone who's been actively theeatening that poor excuse of a man. that menas him, obviously. why he's been threatening him, you ask? because he's not treating you the way you should be treated, duh! sure you look happy but are you really? probably not, he's sure of it. "hey hey, don't worry... I'm here now, aren't i?" he always is, and he always will. you just need to understand that fact and you'll start seeing him in a different light too. don't worry, he has lots of patience. just... don't go sleeping with other people again.
yandere! childhood friend who may or may not be totally super duper mega in love with you. yeah, definitely not in love with you. that would be weird, right? come on, he's your childhood friend! sure you two might've kissed when you were kids and promised to marry one another but those were kiddy promises! that's all they are! he... totally doesn't believe you actually wanna marry him and be his forever and ever.
"so have you started thinking about your future?" he pauses at your question, rubbing at his empty ring finger. future, huh? funny how you ask that when you two are destined to be together at the end of it all. i mean, the two of your promised it as kids, didn't you? sure you're exploring now but at the end if the day, it's him that you come back to, don't you? even if just as a friend. but that's the present, not the future. "nah, not really. just wanna focus on the current moment, y'know?" bullshit, and he knows it. but he doesn't wanna scare you away. not yet at least. you're still out lookign for others which means you haven't come round to the idea of you two together. not to worry, he'll give you a little more time to see how good he is. how good things could be between you two if you just gave him the chance. "i mean, you're here with me." he chuckles, taking your hand in his before placing it on his cheek. you're warm. he likes your warmth, it's so soothing. "that's more than enough for me." half lidded eyes gaze at you, full of emotion and hidden longing before he hums softly. the teo fo you sit in the park in silence, enjoying each other's presence. in the moonlight, everything seems to slow and engulf the two of you in a quiet embrace. he only wishes you would just love him back already. "yeah, I'm glad to be by your side too, best friend." ...he really hates those words. don't worry, good things come to those who wait. and you will be his in due time. you've already had his heart, now all he needs is yours.
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delulustateofmind · 3 months ago
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Can My Friend Join?
Your boyfriend wants his murderer of a best friend to join your relationship. You'll do that for him, right?
Yan!SatoSugu x Reader
Part two
TW: Yandere Behaviors, dubcon/noncon?, Manipulation, SatoSugu, Potential grammatical/spelling errors, oral/fingering (f! receiving), Trapping/love bombing. MDNI
WC: 5.2k
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You see, it wasn’t totally unlike your boyfriend to make crazy decisions.
Satoru was rash, impulsive, yet completely and utterly in love with you in a way that made it hard to say no to him. And he always knew how to work that to his advantage. You’d let him get away with just about anything—like buying a penthouse in Shibuya without even stepping foot in it, or whisking you off on spontaneous trips for “work” that had your boss threatening to fire you every time you gave him a last-minute call about your absence.
Crazy decisions were his specialty, after all. Including the craziest one of all: dating you, a non sorcerer, that was not a well-kept secret from his clan.
And now, his most recent decision was leaving you staring at him in stunned disbelief.
“Come on, baby, he’s going to therapy,” Satoru murmured into your ear, his arms snug around your waist as he rested his chin on your shoulder. His voice was soft, almost coaxing, as he peppered gentle kisses along the curve of your neck. “You remember Sugu, right? You even mentioned you had a little crush on him before we started dating.”
Suguru Geto. The man who’d slaughtered a village, started a cult, and declared genocide on nonsorcerers like you.
But now, according to Satoru, he was “better.” Redeemed, even. Whatever that meant. He wasn’t a deranged cult leader anymore, apparently. Therapy had fixed him. Or at least, that’s what Satoru was claiming with his usual breezy confidence.
“My love,” you began softly, setting the tea you’d been preparing down to turn and face him. His cerulean eyes shone with that familiar affection, the corners crinkling slightly as he gazed down at you like you hung the moon. It made your chest ache. “I know you two… had a thing. But why does he need to be a part of our relationship?”
You tried to keep your tone gentle, like you were trying to reason with him. Because, honestly, you were.
Satoru tilted his head, his grin widening just enough to tell you he’d been prepared for this question. “Mmm, well,” he started, the teasing lilt of his voice softening. “You were there for me, weren’t you? You’ve kept me grounded—saved me, even.” He leaned in to nuzzle against your cheek. “I figured… maybe you could do the same for him. Help him down a better path, you know? Keep an eye on him.”
Your heart sank.
“And,” he added with a sheepish laugh, his blush deepening as his hand rubbed the back of his neck, “well, he was actually the one who suggested it.”
That had your stomach twisting uncomfortably. You searched his face for answers, for some sign that this wasn’t as serious as it sounded. But all you found was that lovesick smile of his.
And you knew.
Satoru still had feelings for Suguru. He’d never said it outright, but the signs were there. The way his voice softened when he spoke of him. The wistful, almost mournful glint in his eyes whenever Suguru’s name came up. And, of course, the times he’d accidentally murmured Suguru’s name in moments of intimacy with you.
Your throat felt tight.
“Satoru…” You struggled to find the words, to balance the storm of emotions swirling in your chest. Jealousy. Confusion. Heartbreak. And, strangely enough, pity.
“It won’t change anything between us,” he said quickly, like he could see your doubts forming. His hands cupped your face, his thumbs brushing soothingly against your skin. “I promise. You’re my person—my love. I just… I can’t let him go again. Not like before.”
You swallowed hard, your voice barely above a whisper. “And what if I can’t do this? What if I can’t… share you?”
Satoru’s expression softened, his usual playful confidence replaced with something raw and pleading. “Please,” he murmured, his voice quieter than you’d ever heard it. It wasn’t like him to plead. To beg. “Just think about it, okay? You won’t be home alone as much anymore when I’m out on missions. With Suguru back, there’ll be two strongest sorcerers. That means I won’t have to work or be on call as much. I’m thinking about us, baby.”
His words were so earnest, so filled with affection, that they pressed against your chest like a weight. You should’ve voiced your opinions, should’ve argued, but the guilt crept in before you could. Satoru had done so much for you—letting you live with him rent-free, covering your schooling, and showering you with a kind of love that had felt impossible in a world where you were so much weaker than him.
How could you say no to him? Not after everything.
So, what if you were allowing some murderer into your relationship? Satoru said he was better now. Satoru loved you. He wouldn’t steer you wrong… right?
You bit your lip, glancing away before nodding hesitantly. “Can we… take things slow, Toru?” Your voice was soft, almost unsure, as you sheepishly met his gaze.
Satoru’s face lit up with relief, his cerulean eyes shining so brightly it was almost blinding. “Oh, of course, baby. As slow as you need to. I know I can be a bit… eager, heh,” he said with a nervous laugh, his hands cupping your cheeks tenderly. Then, with a playful grin, he squished them together, molding your lips into silly fishy shapes.
“There it is! Cute as ever,” he teased, leaning closer, his voice softer now. “But I still love you. You know that, right?”
You nodded automatically, leaning into his touch despite the unease swirling in your stomach. Perhaps, you were overthinking this. Relationships need a bit of spice, right?
“I know,” you murmured, forcing a small smile. “I love you too.”
The words almost came automatically, yet your anxiety continued to ring alarming bells.
He grinned, his usual teasing confidence returning as he kissed your forehead. “That’s my baby. I knew you’d understand.”
And so, within a week, Suguru Geto moved in.
It was awkward at first. You weren’t sure how to act around him—this man who carried a dark, complicated history yet exuded a calm, almost disarming aura. Offering shy smiles felt like the extent of your bravery, and more often than not, you retreated to the sanctuary of your bedroom.
At least Suguru had the decency to move into the guest room initially. That small gesture was a relief in itself. And thankfully, with Satoru and Suguru being sorcerers, you were rarely alone with him. At least not yet.
But Suguru was... considerate. You couldn’t deny that. He had a quiet, almost effortless charm, and while you had your issues—big issues—you couldn’t ignore the fact that he was a handsome, beautiful man.
“Ah, do you need help?” Suguru asked one day, his deep voice breaking the silence as he spotted you reaching for the Christmas decorations tucked away on the highest shelf of the closet.
You froze for a moment, clutching at the edge of the shelf. “No, I’ll be alright… thank you,” you murmured, your voice almost too shy.
Suguru tilted his head, his dark eyes softening as he took a step closer. “It’s no trouble. Here.” Without waiting for permission, he reached up effortlessly, his height making quick work of retrieving the box.
You thanked him quietly, clutching the box as you avoided his gaze. His lips quirked into a faint smile, but he said nothing, stepping back to give you space.
Then there were the times he helped without hesitation, like during grocery trips.
Satoru would inevitably dart off down the aisles, hunting for sweets or whatever caught his attention. Suguru, on the other hand, stuck to your side, the picture of calm efficiency. He’d scan the list you held, nodding thoughtfully before reaching for items on the shelves—always grabbing your favorite brands without you needing to say a word.
“You cook often, don’t you?” he remarked once, glancing at the cart as he placed a box of your preferred pasta into it.
“Uh, yeah,” you replied, startled by how observant he was. “It’s… kind of relaxing.”
He hummed in agreement, his expression neutral but not unkind. “I can see that. I’ll have to try some of your cooking sometime.”
The comment left you flustered, unsure how to respond. Satoru would’ve teased you mercilessly, but Suguru simply kept moving, scanning the shelves like he wasn’t even aware of the small storm brewing in your chest.
It was moments like these—small, thoughtful gestures and quiet interactions—that left you unsettled. Suguru wasn’t what you expected. You’d braced yourself for someone dangerous, cold, someone you couldn’t trust. But instead, he was... kind. Maybe too kind.
And that was what unnerved you the most.
Because every time you caught his lingering gaze or noticed the way he seemed to effortlessly fit into your routines, you couldn’t help but wonder: Was he doing this for Satoru? Or was he doing it for you?
It started off slow. Like a light sprinkle before the storm. 
Satoru was still the same as ever—the fun-loving boyfriend, full of laughter and mischief. He’d press kisses to your cheek, wrap you in his arms, and tease you in that playful way that made your heart flutter. But lately, his words carried a strange edge, a hint of something you couldn’t quite place.
“Maybe start showing Sugu a bit of love,” he teased one evening, nuzzling against your neck as you brushed your teeth. “He’s trying, y’know. Don’t be difficult, baby.”
You froze for a moment, the brush stilling in your hand as you quickly spit out the toothpaste. That… hurt. His tone was light, but the implication stung. Was he disappointed in you?
Still, you managed a tight smile and nodded, swallowing your unease. “I’ll try.”
Satoru grinned, pressing a lingering kiss to your temple. “That’s my baby.”
But then Suguru began to be more… involved.
It wasn’t anything overt at first. He’d sit quietly in the living room while you watched TV, occasionally commenting on the plot like a polite guest. Not as the boyfriend he was supposed to be, that you didn’t want him to be. He’d help with household chores without being asked, his quiet competence a stark contrast to Satoru’s chaotic energy.
But there was something about the way his presence lingered—like a shadow stretching further than it should.
“Tired?” he asked one evening, his voice like honey as you struggled to keep your eyes open on the couch. You felt him sit down beside you, close enough that his warmth seeped into your side.
You nodded, your words slurring slightly. “Yeah… long day.”
Suguru reached out, his fingers brushing against your temple as he tucked a stray strand of hair behind your ear. The touch was gentle, almost tender, but his dark eyes… they hid something.
“You should rest more,” he murmured, his voice low and soothing. “Satoru worries about you.”
You blinked, struggling to process his words. “He does?”
Suguru smiled faintly, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Of course. We both do.”
The way he said it—we—sent a strange chill down your spine.
As the days passed, the small, unsettling moments began to pile up.
Suguru had a way of always being there, always watching. When you left a room, you’d turn to find his gaze following you. When you spoke, he listened so intently it felt like he was dissecting your every word.
And Satoru, who’d always been possessive in his teasing way, started pushing boundaries in ways he hadn’t before.
One evening, as you tried to excuse yourself to your bedroom after dinner, Satoru caught your wrist, pulling you back to the living room where Suguru sat quietly.
“Don’t run off so quick,” he said, his grin wide but his grip firm. “We’re a family now, aren’t we? Stay with us for a bit.”
Suguru looked up from his tea, his dark eyes locking onto yours. “Satoru’s right,” he said softly, his lips curving into a small, almost inviting smile. “It’s nice when we’re all together.”
The way they looked at you—Satoru’s bright gaze brimming with love, Suguru’s dark eyes filled with something deeper, darker—made you feel trapped.
And then, Satoru had to leave.
He was off to Kenya for a mission with a student, and for the first time in what felt like forever, the apartment felt… quieter. You’d thought, perhaps foolishly, that Suguru would be sent off somewhere too, leaving you to breathe for a moment, to process.
But no.
Suguru stayed.
The first few nights felt strange, the absence of Satoru’s boundless energy a sharp contrast to Suguru’s quiet, deliberate presence. He wasn’t pushy—if anything, he gave you more space than usual, offering soft smiles and polite conversation. But there was always something in the air, something unspoken, something that made the silence between you feel heavier than it should.
And then, one night, as you lay in what felt like a bed too big without Satoru’s warmth beside you, you felt it—a hand wrapping around your waist, firm yet gentle, pulling you back against a solid chest.
Your breath hitched as a woodsy, earthy scent filled your nose, inky dark hair brushing against your shoulders.
Your heart sank once again, something it’s been doing a little too much as of late. 
“You’re awake,” Suguru murmured softly, his voice warm and low, like he’d been waiting for you to notice. His lips ghosted against your cheek in a feather-light kiss, making your skin prickle. “Satoru said I should join you. Keep you safe.”
Safe? The word felt foreign, almost cruel, as if it was meant to comfort you when it did the exact opposite.
“Suguru,” you said, your voice trembling as you tried to pull away, but his arm around your waist tightened, holding you in place.
“Shh,” he soothed, his breath warm against your ear. “It’s okay. I know it feels strange, but Satoru trusts me to look after you. He said you get lonely when he’s away.”
Your stomach twisted. This wasn’t Satoru’s doing—at least, not entirely. This was Suguru, using Satoru’s words, his trust, to inch closer, to blur the lines you’d been desperately trying to hold onto.
“You don’t have to do this,” you whispered, your voice barely audible.
His hand moved, sliding up to rest lightly against your ribs, his touch slow and deliberate. “I want to,” he murmured. “You deserve someone to care for you, even when Satoru can’t. That’s what we agreed on, isn’t it?”
You froze. Agreed on?
The realization hit you like a wave, cold and suffocating. This wasn’t just Satoru’s idea. This wasn’t just about keeping you “safe” or “happy.” This was part of something bigger, something the two of them had decided for you, without you.
“I don’t think—” you started, but Suguru cut you off, his voice still maddeningly calm.
“You don’t have to think,” he said softly, almost kindly, as his fingers brushed against your jaw, tilting your head slightly so he could press a kiss to your temple. “Just go to sleep, yeah?”
But the way his grip on you remained firm, the way his body pressed so closely against yours, made it abundantly clear that this wasn’t a request.
Your heart pounded in your chest, a frantic rhythm that you were sure he could feel where his arm wrapped around your waist. Go to sleep? How could you possibly sleep with this man lying so close, his breath steady against the back of your neck, his warmth invading every inch of your space?
Suguru shifted slightly, his arm pulling you tighter against him as though sensing your discomfort. “You’re tense,” he murmured, his tone carrying a strange gentleness. “It’s okay to relax. I’m here.”
His words sent shivers down your body and tendrils of anxiety in your mind, and you squeezed your eyes shut, willing yourself to calm down. But how could you relax when your instincts screamed that something was wrong? That something about him, about this situation, was profoundly off?
You tried to focus on your breathing, hoping it would drown out the sound of your racing thoughts. But every inhale carried the faint, woodsy scent of him—so different from Satoru’s familiar, comforting smell. It was calming, yet suffocating all at once.
A small voice crept in your mind, you shouldn’t feel calm. 
Suguru hummed softly, a low, melodic sound that sent another wave of unease through you. “You smell nice,” he said, almost absentmindedly. His nose brushed against your hair, and you froze as he inhaled deeply. “Like home.”
The words were meant to be reassuring, you thought. But they felt wrong, invasive, like he was claiming a piece of you that wasn’t his to take.
You wanted to say something—anything—but the words caught in your throat. And in that silence, Suguru’s hand shifted, moving from your ribs to rest lightly against your stomach, the weight of it grounding and possessive.
“You’re safe with me,” he whispered, his voice softer now, almost tender. Almost loving. “I’ll keep you safe. Just sleep, okay?”
Your throat tightened, and your breathing came faster as you tried to steady yourself. Safe. He kept using that word, as though repeating it would make it true. As if he were tricking your mind into thinking it was true. 
But how could you feel safe when every instinct in your body screamed at you to run?
Suguru’s grip didn’t waver, and the steady rhythm of his breathing filled the silence, lulling you into a state of uneasy stillness. You didn’t know how long you lay there, rigid and wide-eyed, before exhaustion began to weigh on you.
Your body betrayed you before your mind could catch up. Slowly, reluctantly, your eyes fluttered shut, and your breathing evened out.
You stirred awake to a sensation so surreal, so tender, that in your dreamlike haze, you convinced yourself it was Satoru.
The soft brush of hair between your thighs, a large, calloused hand rested on the fat of your thighs, keeping your legs open, as your eyes were slowly opening from sleep. 
You felt his tongue drift up you sopping slit, moving to circle around your bundle of nerves, a whine escaping your lips as you shifted a little only for a warm hand to press against your abdomen to keep you from moving as he continued to dive deep into your cunt, his tongue switching from spelling a name on your sensitive clit to fucking your tight dripping heat. You couldn’t help but muffle your moans by biting the sheets. 
“Toru…” You whimpered out in pathetic small breaths. “Feels…s’good” it wasn’t like Satoru to be this in-depth with eating you out. It felt like he was mapping out your entire insides as he slowly inserted a finger into your dripping mess. 
You felt a nip on your inner thigh, causing a whine and for you to finally open your eyes. 
“Wrong boyfriend,” Suguru murmured, his voice a low, velvety hum that sent a shiver rippling down your spine. His dark eyes gleamed with amusement as he hovered just above your pussy that clenched around his fat finger that curled in just the right spot, your gummy walls clenching, no, greedily sucking in. His lips curled into a faint, knowing smirk. 
He tilted his head, his inky hair brushing against your trembling thighs as he leaned back down, his movements deliberate, controlled, as though savoring every moment of your reaction. His breath ghosted over your poor pussy, slowly licking up the mess you were leaking as he pushed his finger knuckle deep inside you, before slowly, teasingly adding another one of his thick fingers inside. Compared to Satoru’s thin long fingers, his was different, it was almost mind-numbing as your poor cunny tightened at the sudden intrusion of another finger.  
“Suguru” You panted out. “I-” and a gasp left your lips as you felt him curl both his fingers. Hitting that sweet spot that made you see stars, no colors, all sorts of stars and colors, as he pried you open. Your mouth left agape as you tried to think of anything besides the pleasure and the sickening wet sounds that were filling the bedroom. 
You shouldn’t be enjoying this. You mind sang to you. But god, did it feel so good. 
“Mmmm, such a sweet pussy” he said softly before lightly sucking on your nub, earning sweet moans and whispers from your lips “Want me to stop, pretty?”  he said softly as he released your poor abused little clit with a loud pop. Offering a small kitten lick as you were trying to form a coherent sentence. 
“Come on, baby girl, use your words f’me.” His fingers slipping out of your slickened folds that caused you to look down at him with half-lidded eyes and a pout. You were so fucked.  
“You need me don’t you? Need me to help you?” He said softly as he pulled away, his big warm hand cupping your heat as you bucked your hips, his thumb lightly grazing your clit, toying with it softly. His chin glistened with your juices as he moved close to your face. 
It didn’t help that he was so devastatingly attractive—so effortlessly pretty, yet undeniably handsome. Every sharp line of his jaw, every curve of his lips, and the way his dark eyes seemed to pierce straight through you made it impossible to look away, even when you wanted to. Even when you knew you should.
“Give me a kiss, just one little kiss, and then I’ll let you cum. Okay, pretty?” Suguru hummed softly, his gaze lingering on your plump, red lips, his voice almost syrupy in its coaxing. His dark eyes sparkled with amusement as he took in the teary-eyed expression you offered him. “Can you do that for me?”
You wanted to fight him. Wanted to kick him off, shove him away, bite that insufferable smirk right off his face.
But he made you feel so good.
You were warm, fuzzy, and completely disconnected from yourself. Every logical thought dissolved into the haze of pleasure he’d wrapped you in. Your body betrayed you, nodding mindlessly like some desperate, needy thing you hardly recognized.
“One kiss?” you murmured meekly, your voice trembling.
Suguru’s grin widened, predatory and oh-so smug. “Just one,” he purred, watching as your eyes flickered away from him.
That’s when you saw it.
The camera.
Nestled discreetly in the corner of the room, its cold, unblinking lens stared back at you. Your stomach dropped, the haze clearing just enough for panic to creep in.
Suguru followed your gaze, and when he saw what had caught your attention, he chuckled—a low, dark sound that sent a shiver down your spine.
“Oh,” he said smoothly, as though you’d stumbled upon a delightful surprise. “You found the camera.” He leaned in closer, his lips brushing against yours, his voice a whisper now. “Say hi to Toru.”
Before you could react, his lips crashed against yours, the kiss fierce and consuming, stealing the breath from your lungs. It wasn’t gentle—it was possessive, demanding, a declaration that left no room for resistance. His hand slid to the back of your neck, holding you in place as his tongue brushed against yours, coaxing a response you couldn’t deny.
Every fleeting thought of resistance melted under the heat of his touch, leaving you utterly at his mercy, the world narrowing to the overwhelming intensity of him.
That fuzzy, dreamlike feeling reeled in your mind, spinning you further into a haze. The high you were on didn’t feel natural—it was too consuming, too overwhelming. Even after you came for the nth time, your body still burned with need, craving more despite the exhaustion creeping into your limbs.
You glanced at Suguru through the haze, his expression soft, almost tender, as he leaned down to scoop you into his arms. His strength was effortless, and the gentle smile that tugged at his lips felt entirely out of place with the aching mess he’d left you in.
“Let’s get you cleaned up, yeah?” he hummed softly, cradling you as though you weighed nothing.
Your body refused to cooperate, too spent and trembling to do anything but lay limply in his embrace. Resigning yourself to your inability to fight, you rested your head against his chest, feeling the steady rise and fall of his breath beneath your cheek. It was almost comforting if not for the gnawing unease beneath the surface of your mind.
As he carried you to the bathroom, his voice broke the silence, low and soothing. “Satoru’s coming home today,” he said, his tone so calm, so casual, that it sent a chill down your spine. “He’s going to be so proud of the progress we made, yeah?”
The words hung in the air, their weight suffocating.
The day stretched on in a blur, and though Suguru remained by your side, tending to you with a gentleness that felt far too intimate, you couldn’t shake the words he’d spoken.
Satoru’s coming home today. He’s going to be so proud of the progress we made.
Each passing moment only tightened the knot in your stomach, the uneasy anticipation building to a crescendo by the time the front door opened with Satoru’s familiar sing-song call.
“My sweet sugar bears, I’m home!”
His voice echoed through the apartment, bright and teasing as always, but it carried a weight that hadn’t been there before. You stiffened, clutching the edges of the blanket Suguru had wrapped around you as you sat on the couch, your heart pounding in your chest.
Suguru, seated beside you with a calm, almost serene expression, stood and moved to greet him. “Welcome back,” he said, his tone warm and inviting.
Satoru appeared moments later, his bright cerulean eyes sweeping over the room before landing on you. His grin widened, mischievous and utterly unapologetic.
“There’s my girl,” he said, striding over and crouching in front of you. His hand reached out to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing gently against your skin. “Missed you.”
You swallowed hard, unsure of what to say as his gaze lingered on you, almost too intently.
Then he turned his attention to Suguru, who was now leaning casually against the wall, his arms crossed as he watched the interaction unfold.
“And you,” Satoru said, his grin taking on a sharper edge. “You really outdid yourself this time, Sugu.”
Suguru inclined his head slightly, the faintest trace of a smirk tugging at his lips. “I’m glad you think so. She was… responsive.”
Your stomach twisted at the way they spoke, as if you weren’t even there—or worse, as if you were some sort of project they’d been collaborating on.
Satoru’s attention flicked back to you, and his grin softened into something almost affectionate. “I loved the video,” he said, his voice low as he leaned closer, his breath brushing against your ear. “You looked so perfect for him, baby. It made me jealous.”
Your blood ran cold.
“The—video?” you managed to whisper, your voice trembling as your mind raced to catch up.
Satoru tilted his head, his grin widening again as he straightened. “Oh, come on, don’t play coy now,” he teased, reaching out to ruffle your hair like you were some pet he was fond of. “You knew about the camera, didn’t you? Suguru said you even looked right at it.”
Suguru’s chuckle was low, almost inaudible, but it caused your chest to tighten. Throat to clench up, you suddenly wanted to cry. 
“We’ll have to make more next time,” Satoru continued, his tone light, almost playful, like he was discussing something as mundane as dinner plans. His grin stretched wide, carefree, but his words carried a weight that left your chest tight. “But don’t worry—I’ll be in the next one. No way I’m missing out again.”
The floor beneath you might as well have disappeared. The weight of their words pressed down on you, heavy and suffocating, and your heart hammered as panic welled in your chest.
“No,” you said, your voice trembling. “No, this isn’t… This isn’t right. You can’t just—”
Suguru stepped forward, his movements unhurried, deliberate. His dark eyes locked onto yours, unreadable yet brimming with a quiet intensity that made your skin prickle. He stopped just behind Satoru, his presence looming, steady.
“We’re a team, after all,” he said softly, his voice smooth and calm, like he was explaining something obvious. “It’s only fair we share.”
“No,” you said again, louder this time. The word came out sharp, cutting through the air like a blade, though your hands trembled as you clenched them into fists. “This isn’t fair. This isn’t normal, Satoru, Suguru—this isn’t love.”
For a moment, the room seemed to freeze, the weight of your words hanging in the tense silence.
Suguru’s lips curled into a faint smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Is that what you think?” he asked, his tone soft, almost disappointed. He tilted his head slightly, his dark hair spilling over his shoulder as he regarded you with something akin to pity. “You think this isn’t love?”
“Yes,” you said, though the tremor in your voice betrayed your confidence. “This isn’t right. You’re asking too much—this isn’t something I can give.”
Suguru took another step closer, his gaze unwavering. “And what do you think love is, then?” he asked, his voice low, coaxing. “Is it not trust? Devotion? Sacrifice?” He leaned in slightly, his presence suffocating as his words wrapped around you like a vice. “After everything Satoru and I have done for you, everything we’ve given you as of late—are you really saying we don’t deserve your love in return?”
Your breath caught in your throat, the weight of his words sinking into your chest like stones. You had to swallow back your tears. “That’s not what I—”
“But it is,” Suguru interrupted, his voice never rising, never breaking its calm, steady cadence. “You’re saying no to us. To him. To me. After everything we’ve done to keep you safe, to give you the life you have now.”
You’d be nothing without them. You almost owe your life to Satoru alone. 
His words twisted in your mind, sharp and cutting, making you question the thoughts you’d clung to just moments before. He stepped even closer, his dark eyes softening, his tone shifting to something almost tender. “Do you really think it’s fair to push us away when all we want is to love you? To care for you? To protect you?”
Your lips parted, but the words died in your throat.
Satoru crouched slightly to meet your gaze, his cerulean eyes wide and impossibly soft. “Don’t you love me?” he asked, his voice heartbreakingly gentle. “Because if you do, baby, then you can love us.”
Suguru nodded, his smile warming into something deceptively kind. “We’re not asking for much,” he murmured. “Just for you to trust us. To let us take care of you. Isn’t that what love is about?”
The room spun, their words swirling in your mind, drowning out the panic that had gripped you moments before. Their voices, so soothing, so insistent, chipped away at your resolve, making you question everything you thought you knew.
“Shh, you’re cryin’,” Satoru said softly, brushing his fingers against your cheek, his touch gentle as he wiped your hot frustrated tears. “Don’t overthink it, baby. Just let us love you. That’s all we want.”
Suguru’s hand came to rest lightly on your shoulder, his grip firm but not forceful, his voice dropping to a near whisper. “You don’t want to disappoint us, do you? Satoru has given you everything. Don’t you think you owe us this much?”
The words struck deep, guilt twisting in your chest as you struggled to breathe.
They loved you. This is love, right?
1K notes · View notes
lymtw · 5 months ago
Text
Talk To Me
"Come here," Toji says, at the sight of the involuntary pout that works wonders to express your internal, dispirited mood. His attention is divided very unevenly between you and the movie playing on the TV, you holding the greater part of his focus. He's watching you for his own peace of mind, hoping that every time you take a break from the movie, to check your phone, you'll spare him a look. You've been quieter than he knows you to be, and you're not sitting even remotely close to him. He's on one side of the couch and you're on the other side.
A few seconds pass since Toji spoke up, and he wonders if you even heard him in the first place, because you didn't respond. He passes on repeating himself when you shift your eyes from the TV to meet his gaze, and though your gloominess isn't because of him, you can't offer him any sort of indication that you're good.
"Sorry, i'm not in the mood to take my clothes off, Toji," you say, your voice a gentle, pitiful excuse for sound. If your voice could be seen, it would be similar to the tragic way that grass blades slowly try to stand up, after being stepped on. If the sound of your voice could be felt, it would be the void-like, almost nauseating feeling in your stomach, that comes with ignored hunger. You sound detached from the bright person Toji knows, and clearly, you're not okay.
"I'm not asking you to undress yourself. I want you to come to me," Toji responds. "You're sitting so far over there, away from me, like I did something to you. For being the most reasonable person I know, this isn't fair, at all." His eyes stay on you as he awaits your response, but he is only met with the sight of you looking down at your hands.
"Be fair. You didn't help me get better at communicating, just to turn the tables on me like this." His tone is sharper, out of urgency. He wants to know what he can do for you, but it's hard to do that when you're there, yet, not there. "Just... come here, ma," Toji tries again, his voice a little softer and understanding. "Please. Let's talk about anything." He pats his thigh, directing you to one of the reserved spots he holds for intimate conversations with you.
You know Toji's stubbornness will not leave you alone. It's impossible to hide anything from him once he's onto you, so you stop prolonging the inevitable and silently do as he says.
You turn off the TV, before walking over to him and settling on his lap. You sit there, with a racing heart, because Toji's attention feels like a spotlight on you. His hands interlock at the small of your back and rest there, as he waits for you to say something. Silence invades the moment while you figure out where to start.
"What's wrong?" He asks, when there is no attempt to speak made by you. Immediately, your throat begins to ache, and your eyes start to sting. It's a question known for breaking people, and you're on the brink of becoming another victim. You think you can widen your eyes to keep them dry or blink away the tears, but the outcome doesn't favor you. Toji's hands shift so that they're splayed out on your lower back. They move up and down in soothing motions, as if he's trying to coax your strong emotions out with the comforting gesture. Like a gloomy sky finally giving in to rain, you cave in to vulnerability.
"Baby?" Toji calls, watching as sadness takes over your features. He sighs as he pulls your twinkly-eyed self into his tight embrace. He hates when you cry. The sound and the sight is the equivalent of pouring acid on his heart. It's torture for him to see that his baby, his sweetheart, his love, has been reduced to streams of tears, but he knows that getting it all out is for your own good. This is the 'alcohol in the wound' part of the process. You don't want to do it, but you'll feel better, afterwards. Just like a real physical wound, Toji will make you get it done. Scream if you must, curl into him like you are trying to go through him, he's not going to abandon you.
"Just breathe, sweet girl," he instructs, when he hears the heart wrenching sound of your stuttered breaths. "Breathe. Give me a good one," he says, rubbing your upper back. You inhale, the act still heavily stuttered, before you exhale. "Good. Again." You repeat the process and get the same trembling breath as a result.
"Fuck," you choke out. Your head feels like it's pulsing, your abdomen burns, your chest feels heavy, as if you have chains tightly wrapped around your torso, and your throat aches. It's all so overwhelming, you feel like there's a disastrous storm ruining you from within.
"Sweetheart, please breathe. You're gonna turn blue any minute now." Toji can't hold you any tighter without crushing you, but he wants to, so badly. This is the lowest he's ever seen you and it's killing him. He has never made you this upset. It's hell to even imagine what you must have endured to get to this point.
"You're safe. I have you," he says, bringing a hand up to cradle the back of your head. "I'm here, baby."
Toji's shoulder is damp from your waterfalls of tears and he can feel an excessive amount of heat radiating from your trembling body. Your crying ceases and all that can be heard are sharp, short inhales and puffs of air, as you try to regulate your breathing. Toji continues running his hands over your back, soothing the tired, tense muscles of your shoulder blades.
"We are gonna have to talk about this later, doll. I know that might not sound like the most fun thing to do, but it'll make you feel better. I want you to feel better."
Toji is mindful of your silence. He knows your voice isn't in the best condition to speak after your surge of emotions, and you're probably exhausted, but this isn't a dead end for him. He'll figure out your needs, and he'll take care of you. Anything to bring your happy, smiling face, back.
Toji allows you to pull away from his shoulder, and instantly takes in the sight of your pretty, ruined face. You don't look at him, and he assumes that your appearance is to blame. Your eyes, they're red and puffy, glimmering in the light with your now contained feelings, and you're still sniffing like you need to blow your nose. It's terrible to see you this way, but he would withstand much more than this, if you needed it.
"How does a bath sound, for now? A bath and then some food? You hungry, mama?" He asks, his expression involuntarily soft, as he runs the pads of his thumbs beneath your eyes, attempting to clean you up a little.
"No," you say, quietly, with the fragility that remains of your voice.
"I'm gonna pick up some food while you relax." Toji almost laughs at the subtle roll of your eyes. "That's my bad. I shouldn't have asked in the first place. You need to eat something."
He doesn't want to put you through any more stress, but when he needs to take care of you, during times like this, he knows what you need more than you do. Your reasoning is clouded by your emotions, and you'll let go of yourself, because your thoughts rewind over and over to what's plaguing your mind. Toji knows you'll be glad he did this for you when you feel better.
"Let's get that bath ready," he says, securing your legs around his waist, before he stands up from the couch. Your face is buried in the crook of his neck, and you breathe in his scent, until you reach the bathroom.
Toji flicks the light on and sets you down on the counter. A chaste kiss is pressed to your tearstained cheek, before he lets you go so he can prepare your bath. You turn your head to look at yourself in the mirror and hate the messy sight before you—the product of your meltdown. You turn on the cold water and splash some on your face, hoping to decrease the puffiness of your eyes, even just a little bit, while Toji is busy. You dry your face afterwards and check your appearance in the mirror, again, to clean up any remaining gunk in your eyes.
When you finish, you turn back, just in time to watch Toji rise from his knelt position by the bathtub. He makes his way back to you and stands between your legs, offering you a contemplative look, and a "hm" to go along with it. No words are exchanged when his hand reaches out to gently cup your jaw, allowing him to turn your head in any way he wants. He leans forward to examine you more closely, to check if anything is "broken". He can see you pressing your lips together, trying not to laugh, as he continues to snoop around.
"Oh," he says, like he found a cable that has simply been disconnected. He turns your head a little, and keeps inspecting the problematic area, building up the suspense for you. You couldn't say it, but him finding something scared you a little, considering you had just looked at your reflection and didn't see anything.
"Don't move, doll. I'll get it." His hand rests on your shoulder, the other on your thigh, as he leans in closer and closer, until his body heat coils around you. He presses a kiss to the side of your neck. It's featherlight, almost like a gentle breeze. Another one lands on the same area, then another, and another, until he hears your little laugh, a sound that brought both of you mutual relief. Your relief came from understanding that Toji didn't actually find anything off, while Toji's came from the miracle of him being able to make you laugh, after what went down not that long ago.
"Two seconds, ma," he says, beneath your ear. He pulls away from you and goes back to the now foam covered, sweet smelling bathtub. He leans down to turn the faucet off, and returns to you, afterwards.
"It's all ready for you," he says. A smile curls on his lips when you raise your arms, signaling for him to pull your shirt off. "You wanna keep your bra and underwear on?" He asks, as he pulls the hem of your shirt up. You nod, just before the material goes over your head. He sets it aside and helps you down, off the counter, so you can take your sweatpants off. You pull your phone out of your pocket and set it on the counter. Your fingers hook into the waistband of your sweatpants and tug downwards, until they just slide down your legs and allow you to step out of them.
Toji watches you carefully step over the edge of the tub, one foot sinking through the foam and into the warm water, followed by your other foot. You crouch down, slowly, until you are able to sit down and eventually lay back. You close your eyes once you're in a comfortable position and just let the warm water and the pretty smell work its magic on you.
Toji kneels beside you, and observes you in a more serious manner than before. His gaze lingers on those tired eyes of yours, for longer than any of your other facial features. Your eyelids are still swollen and the bags beneath your eyes are prominent. The longer he stares, the more he thinks back to how you were so distressed, to the point where you forgot how to breathe for a few seconds. It scared him. He didn't get a single word about what was wrong, from you. You couldn't say anything other than that single curse, but even then, you sounded like you were being strangled by your own emotions.
Toji knows this is only a temporary fix— this calm sight of you resting in a bubble bath. Your feelings won't be swept under the rug, because he knows that if it were him going through this exact situation, you wouldn't just give him a hug and call it a day. No, when you take care of his mind and heart, you hold him in your arms and don't let go until he's the one trying to cage himself in your embrace when your arms loosen around him. You keep your voice at an intimate volume as you tell him about your day, because sometimes he isn't immediately ready to talk about what is bothering him, but he still wants to hear you. You cook for him, you give his tired body massages, you shower him with love and affection, and when he's finally ready to tell you what's going on, you listen closely to everything he has to say and you offer him your utmost support. You love and protect him to no end, and he has become shamelessly clingy towards you, because of it.
He wants you to feel as loved as he does. He wants you to know what it's like to experience the same level of care you give him. He may not be able to replicate it to a T, but he's willing to try for you.
"Hey," Toji calls, tenderly running the knuckle of his index finger back and forth, over your cheek. You hum, and blink open your eyes, giving him your attention. "I'm gonna go get us some food. Stay on the phone with me and keep me company until I get back, yeah?"
You nod. "Yeah, okay. Can you bring me my phone, please?"
Toji gets back on his feet and takes one large step towards the counter, retrieving your phone, before taking that same step back to leave it next to you, on the edge of the bathtub.
"Be right back, doll. Pick up the phone as soon as I call, okay?"
"Okay."
His hands grip the edge of the bathtub, to prevent him from falling in, as he leans in to peck your cheek once more. His weight shifts onto one arm so he can bring a hand to your face and rub the kiss into your skin with his thumb.
"Love you, ma."
"Love you, too."
With that, Toji stands up straight and heads towards the door. He takes one last look at your pretty face, before exiting the bathroom and closing the door behind him. He grabs his phone from the couch, his keys from the hook on the wall, and messily slides his shoes on, not bothering to put them on correctly, since he won't be getting out of the car, anyways. He secures the inside of the house, before heading out, and once he's outside, he finds his house key and locks the door. He fishes his phone out of his pocket and makes haste of clicking the phone icon, and then your contact, as he keeps walking to the car. His phone is now against his ear, and he listens as the line rings once... twice...
"Hi, Toji."
"Hi, baby."
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