#but i am also so scared & sad bc its the last season

[yen-stanning]

THE SCREAM OF JOY I LET OUT WHEN I GOT THE NOTIFICATION FOR TBB S3 TRAILER WAS EVERYTHING

THEN THE SCREAMS OF JOY WHILE WATCHING THE TRAILER WERE EVEN BETTER!!!!

AAAHHH IT LOOKS SO GOOD!!! I AM SO READY FOR THIS

[footiehoemcfc]

A sip, and you score

Hello :), this is my first John fic, ngl I'm nervous bc its my first time writing for him. Anyway, if you have any ideas or request you can send them to me I will gladly do them :). My master list is pinned in my blog if you want to check it out. Fluff, smut, tw none, 2.8k words.

To say this season for John has been amazing is an understatement. He was selected for the England world cup squad, he is now challenging for the title again, UCL semis again, the FA cup final and having played in different positions and out of his comfort zone so well. You were very excited for him and so proud of all the hard work he has done, seeing it payoff is amazing. 

You and John started dating during Covid year. It was a very weird way to start a relationship, to quarantine with someone you had met for just 2 months. In a way, it was the best thing that could’ve happened to both of you. You had someone to spend a lot of time with, at times where it could become quite boring. You got to know him more than anyone and discover that actually, you two were perfect for each other. When you two first started dating, he was struggling to get into the team. It sucked seeing him sad and upset but seeing the progress he has made from that time to now; it just amazes you.

You were currently cuddled up to him, his arms around your waist and his chest pressed to your back. It was early in the morning and you knew his alarm would be annoying you at any second. Today was a big day, they were playing against Arsenal at home. John had told you he was not nervous but excited for this game. You on the other hand, you were very nervous because you know how south a game can go. 

You don’t know why, but you woke up with a very different feeling this morning than the feeling you had last night about the game. You felt in your gut they would win, and John having scored already and played amazingly you had a feeling he could score again. You didn’t want to jinx it, but you also wanted to let him know how sure you were and how confident you felt in him. 

You got up from bed carefully to not wake your sleeping boyfriend so he could enjoy 5 more minutes of sleep. You went straight to the kitchen to make yourself and John a cup of tea. You noticed the time, it was 8:55 am. You noticed how many tea bags were left, 5. You noticed you had unread messaged from last night, 5. You remembered a scene from the movie you binged with John last night, Focus. How they made someone choose the exact player they wanted him to choose to win a bet by making the man see the number 5 the whole day and subconsciously pick 55. All of these 5’s was giving you even more of a better feeling. You were always a big believer in intuition and going with your gut. 

You were thinking about all of this while making tea and jumped a little when you felt two strong arms wrap around your waist. “Morning my love” John said kissing your cheek. “Hi baby”, you stopped doing what you were doing, turned around and hugged him. Once you pulled away, John went outside so your dog could go potty and to take the trash out. 

John came back in and sat in the stool from the kitchen bar looking at his phone. You finished up the tea and placed his mug in front of him. “Are you excited about today?” you asked taking a sip from your tea. He placed his phone on the table and looked back at you, “Yea, I feel like it’s going to be a good game honestly”. “I have a good feeling too” “How? You said you were nervous last night” he says laughing. You laughed as well, you were scared but all these signs gave you a good feeling. Before John could take the first sip of his tea, you wanted to tell him it was different today. “I made a different tea today and… a sip of it means your scoring today so” you said playfully and proudly. “Is that so? You are making like a magic tea for me then?” he asked smiling. “Yea, I woke up with a good feeling today” “alright then” he takes a sip from his mug and smiles. He takes another one and soon enough he finishes his tea. “I guess I’m scoring a goal today then” he says smirking and you laugh. “If you do actually score, I want a bit of credit” you say as he comes closer to you. He grabs your face gently and kisses you. “You will get more than that”, you smirk when he says this knowing exactly what he means. 

John went back to his room to shower and leave to the training center before the game. Meanwhile you started doing work stuff to be free in the evening since you were attending the game. “Okay my love I’m off” John appears in your little office like space to kiss you goodbye. “Bye baby”, you both hug each other tightly like you do before every single game. He kisses you lovingly, “good luck yea? I know you are going to be so great today” you said smiling against his lips. He kisses you one more time before he has to leave. 

As excited as you were, you always had that thought in the back of your head of “what if they actually lose?” but you distracted yourself with work stuff, house chores and organizing your stuff around the house. 

It was near 6 pm and you started getting ready to go to the stadium. His family would all be there today, as well as some of the other teammates girlfriends which you have gotten very close with. Once you were satisfied with your makeup and outfit, you headed to your car. The whole ride to the stadium was filled with John’s playlist and it kind of made your nervousness go away, at least for a little bit. 

You were the first one in the box and you could see the staff arranging a banner they would display and the players warming up on the pitch. Before every game you would text John a quick message consisting of I love you and Good luck. This time, it included something else. “Already at the stadium! I love you and good luck! Score that goal for me please ;)”. 

Everyone else arrived to the box, you greeted his mom, dad, sister and Sasha who was in the box next to you. “I need them to win otherwise Jack gets so moody and it’s annoying” you laughed at Sashas’s joke. You were in between John’s sister and Sasha watching the game. The atmosphere was amazing, the stadium was bouncing. Everyone knew how important this game would be in order to win the title this season. 

The ref blew the whistle and not even 10 minutes in, Kevin scored the opener causing the whole stadium to roar. The game was looking good. You were holding either Sasha’s hand or fidgeting with your bracelets from the anxiety you had. Just before half time, they gained a free kick. You knew John loves his header goals, so you were excited to see if it would be a goal from him. Kevin made a really good pass and John was able to put it in the net. You all stood up once the ball went in, screamed but not even for a second. The goal was ruled as offside. “For fuck’s sake man” you said sitting down and covering your face. “They need to probably check it, damn that looked like a great goal” John’s sister told you. “Yea they are checking look” Sasha says pointing to the screen. “I really need him to score otherwise I will look like an idiot and disappoint him” you said while biting down on your nails, “what? What do you mean?” Sasha asked chuckling. “Oh god, I woke up today with a good feeling he would score and I told him, I was very confident and now if he doesn’t I will feel dumb” you said almost laughing know realizing it was just dumb coincidence all the signs you saw. “Oh my god look!” Sasha says pointing to the screen. The green line. It was a goal. You fucking called. “Yes!! I called it! Oh my god!”. Once the referee gave the goal, the whole stadium and all the players started celebrating and singing John’s song. You were so happy for him, and you saw he blew you kiss from the pitch after celebrating. 

The whole second half, city were playing amazingly with Kevin scoring another goal and Erling in the last minutes scoring one as well. You were so happy for the team, but you were even happier for John. You knew how much it meant to him the fans singing his name and making them proud. 

While you waited for John in the player’s lounge, you caught up with his family and some of the other wives and girlfriends. You still felt a lot of adrenaline form the game but the only thing you wanted to do right now was to hug and kiss John and say, “I told you so”. 

You saw your tall boyfriend enter the room and greet his parents first. They hugged him and congratulated him on the win and the goal. Once he saw you, he couldn’t help but just laugh to himself knowing exactly what you were about to say. He hugged you tight and kissed your temple. “I might more of your magic tea for the rest of the season” he whispered in your ear. You just laughed, pulled away just enough to see his face and give him a kiss. “I told you” you said smiling against his lips and he just chuckled. Once he talked to his parents and sister a bit more, they informed him he had to do some post-match interview. “I won’t be long yea, let me know when you get home yea?” he kisses your temple and leaves to the media room. You said your goodbyes to everyone and arrived safe at home. 

You made something quick to eat before John arrived so you could both just go to bed peacefully. Once you were done eating and cleaning up in the kitchen, you went upstairs to your bedroom and started getting ready for bed. You changed into your little shorts and a just a training bra. You pulled out your face wash, moisturizer, eye cream and oils to do your skin care. While you were washing your face, you heard the front door open meaning John was already home. “Babe?” John called out for you, “In the bathroom” you yelled out. 

You felt his two strong arms wrap around your waist while you were just applying moisturizer on your face. He gave started kissing your cheek, your shoulder and neck. Once he reached your sweet spot, you didn’t even realize you had stopped moving and just enjoying his kisses. “You said you wanted me to give you credit right” John whispered in your neck. You closed your eyes while his hand started touching your stomach, waist and finally comping up and cupping your breasts. “John” you moaned out, you turned around and immediately kissed him. It was a rough but loving kiss. His hand on your waist, your hands grabbing his neck and pulling on his hair. He lifted you up and you wrapped your legs around his torso. He carried you to bed, laid you down and kept making out with him in the process. He was on top of you kissing you, but he stood up and removed his hoodie and his joggers. He came back down and started kissing your lips again. Your hands roamed all over his toned body. 

After just kissing and making out for a little bit, you wanted to make him feel good after the game today. You tried to push him so you could be on top, but he stopped you “I thought I had to give you credit” he said smiling against your lips. “Yea, but I want to make you feel good”. He agreed and you were now on top of him. He was laying down while you were sitting on his lap. You stared slowly removing your bra so your breasts could be free. Once you threw your bra to the other side of the room, John came back up to you and nuzzled his face in between your breasts kissing them causing you to moan. Your hand pulling his hair, him gripping your hips, you rolling them so you could feel his bulge in your core. “Take this off” he said pulling your shorts down. You took your mini shorts off and now were completely naked straddling him. 

“Lay down babe” you whispered in his ear. He laid back down, you stood up and started removing his boxers. One off, you took him in the palm of your hand and started stroking him making him close his eyes and moan at your touch. You started slowly and after a minute, you place your mouth on him. He grabbed your hair, making you go up and down. As much as you loved how John always wanted to make you feel good, feel his face in between your legs, you loved making him feel good and making him cum. You didn’t want to finish just yet. You wanted to do it at the same time as him. 

“Baby, if you keep going I’m gonna cum” John says in between moans. You were on your knees bobbing your head up and down when he said this. You started coming back up to his face slowly, kissing all over his abs and torso, his chest, neck and finally his lips. You lined up your wet core with his cock and sank down in it. Once he was fully in you, it felt so good. You had your eyes closed, moaning while he watched and loved the view. This was his favorite position, you riding his cock. You started bouncing up and down, your breasts as well and John started moaning at the sight of you. “Oh my god John”, it felt so good. 

“I’m close” he started moaning, his hand firm gripping your hips helping you bounce on his cock. “Me too baby” you moaned out. You felt his hands leave your hips and grab your breasts. You lowered your hand down to your clit to feel your orgasm even more, turning John on more. He came up to you, now face to face to kiss you. He removed your hand from your clit and replaced them with his. You were both panting and moaning in each other’s mouth. “I’m cuming John” “Me too my love” “Cum with me baby”, it didn’t take long for both of you to see stars and cum at the same time. 

Straddling him, both of you just hugged riding out your high. He kissed your neck and chest lovingly. You pulled away to see his face and give him a kiss. He moved your strands of hair out of your face so he could see you properly. Your face was flushed and a bit sweaty like him. “I fucking love fucking you” John whispered against your mouth making you smile. “I love fucking you too” you replied chuckling. “Was that enough credit for the goal or do you need more?” “Mmmm maybe in the morning I can get more credit”, both of you laughed. 

Once you got cleaned up, you were too tired from the activities that took place. John made sure the front door was locked and all the lights were turned off. Once he returned back into the room, he laid down in bed and pulled you as close as possible to him. Your nose was bumping his, his hand around your waist and your hands on his chest and cupping his face. “I didn’t tell you before but, you played really good today. I love seeing you play so good because I know it means you are in a good place” he just smiled at what you said and kissed your nose. “Well I wouldn’t be in a good place if it wasn’t for you, you know?”, “what do you mean” you were confused now. “Ever since we’ve been together, I feel like you’ve been the one person in my life who has cared about me, like how I actually feel outside of football. You’re always at the games supporting me even if I don’t play, you’re the only person I want to see after a loss. I know I haven’t really said it but I’m very grateful for all of that” His comment made you smile and blush a little. You were happy that he appreciated you being a supportive girlfriend. “Well I just want to make sure you’re happy you know? I hated seeing you upset when you didn’t play or didn’t get called up. I’m really proud of how far you’ve come” “Thank you babe”. He kissed you, “I love you, more than anything” “Me too John, more than anything”. 

[brekker-by-brekkerr]

hsmtmts s4 spoilers ahead!

so i actually liked hsmtmts season 4. and i never expected to be saying that. from the trailers, i was worried the high school musical 4 plotline would take over and make the story too crowded. i thought they would focus too much on new characters. i had my problems with how portwell was handled and how EJ's plotline was handled in season 3. i was scared they would turn EJ into this guy who peaked in high school. i thought half of the theatre kids would be missing.

but i've never been happier to be wrong. yes, it took me a second to warm up to this season (though I'm looking forward to rewatching it and seeing how these thoughts change) and some choices felt especially out of pocket, and i still have problems with things, but this was still. so good. it honoured the heart of the early seasons and each character was given so much love. i'm so happy EJ Caswell my love was still a part of the show and got to sing and have his moments and story. i'm not super happy with how much of it was more for ricky's benefit and i still think he deserved so much better but i like them being friends. i like where he ended up with gina.

I am so proud of each of these characters and how much they have grown. I'm especially proud of how much Gina and Ricky have matured and how much they've learned from their past relationships

this season brought me the things i said i needed for me to support ricky and gina. yes portwell will forever have my heart and i will read fanfiction about a world where they got together and dream about what should have been but I'm also learning to be okay with the way things went this season. they were respectful of ej and gina as characters (other than taking risotto away what was that >:0), had them communicating and in such a healthy way and gina apologizing, and it felt so much kinder than last season. and the show acknowledged how it's always gina having to go first and put in the work and they had ricky change that! ricky really did show up and not gonna lie that love confession scene at the end got me it was good. they're not going to be my favourite ship ever by any means but that's okay. i can understand why other people love them and i just hope we can all be friends bc there are so many good ships in this fandom lol so we can all calm down and stop bullying each other thanks <3 (seriously the way none of these ships are problematic but people will be saying the rudest stuff if you mention a ship they don't like. like the number of posts i keep seeing calling people stupid and lacking in media literacy for having a different opinion is just so unnecessary)

and i was so happy for gina in this season! having her moment, showing so much strength and growth she was just everything and i love her so much.

i like that hsm 3 had its moment. and i am so so so happy all of the family was back (other than nini I'm sad she couldn't be there but i also didn't think she would be unfortunately). the highlight of everything for me was really gina's goodbye speech to everyone. it was so beautiful it felt like a love letter to every character on the show and i appreciated that so much.

so even though it was messy and imperfect and i love seasons 1 and 2 much much more, this season was so strongly found family and it's the found family i love and I'm happy with the ending. it had me sobbing because these characters (and the interactions I've had with people in the fandom) have meant so much to me. i started this show as a senior in high school and now I'm going into my senior year of college and this show with its found family of theatre kids and the soundtrack have been a huge comfort for me and I'm just happy it ended in a place i could appreciate (especially because i didn't think i would be saying any of this after season 3).

so for every moment of heartbreak this show caused me, I'm still happy knowing it ended with these theatre kids laughing and singing in a limo driving to denny's. maybe i would change some things along the way, but that was the perfect ending.

[bekkachaos]

*screams about heartstopper*

like literally i dont think any one piece of media has ever made me so joyful! It just just so beautiful. Visually its so pretty, thematically it toes (tows?) the line of realistic and comforting really well (at least for me), the acting is incredible - especially considering the age of the actors, and the constant unapolagetic queerness that is so obvoiusly written by queer people is so refreshing and just .. nice to see. Nick saying 'im bi, actually' so many times was heartwarming and - as someone who is bi themself - it was so nice to see that the only time the usual bi stereotypes were presented was through nicks anxiety (and also ben). I am so scared to see where they take nick's self worth in regards to his 'similarities' to ben bc i don't want to see him sad. I had already read the comics so it was so cool to see how effective this adaptation is continuing to be. the final few scenes of episode 6 have altered me as a human being and are like a visual form of pure nostalgia and comfort. the taylor song in there is so gorgeous. and speaking of songs the entire soundtrack was perfect (like they understand the vibe and the target audience) and had me doing the leo dicaprio pointing meme constantly. I also watched both seasons several times in the last few weeks and probably will rewatch for the rest of my life tbh. I cannot wait for the next season. anyway yea

I 100% agree I just watch this show or read the comics and I am smiling uncontrollably and just feel so warm and comforted and happy it's insane!! It's so beautiful to see something that feels so genuine and it's awkward but sweet and even seeing the changes and growth of all the characters from season 1 to season 2 feels so realistic!

Nick Nelson saying "I'm bi, actually" about seven times in S2 is literally so accurate and I felt so validated by that because it's so real (also as a fellow bisexual) to have to continually justify your sexuality depending on who you're in a relationship with. The queer rep is just wonderful and can I just say that Isaac's journey this season was one of my favourites and the way I screamed when he went back into the library and claimed the ace book at the end 🤌

Anyone who hurts Nick Nelson or makes him feel sad must endure my wrath! I want to put him in my pocket and protect him from all the sad in the world he is so sweet and caring and kind to Charlie, I hate seeing him compare himself to Ben but I love the way they showed that yes the situation was similar but he was so different because he cared about how his coming out made Charlie feel too and they literally talked and communicated, it was fucking beautiful.

And the whole hickey shenanigans from Charlie noticing it (or lbh from when Buck gave it to him) was so funny and realistic and just that episode was perfection (I'm saying this like all episodes weren't 😅)

The Taylor song scene literally did things to my heart, I felt that scene physically, and you are so right the whole soundtrack is perfect! I mean, Taylor aside you have girl in red, Conan Gray, Gabrielle Aplin, wolf Alice, Holly humberstone, Miya folick like so many more I am obsessed with the soundtrack! And have you listened to the "to Nick from Charlie" playlist based on the mixed tape from vol 1? It's literally also a vibe and has Hayley kiyoko (my beloved) and Troye Sivan (I was JUST SAYING that his blue neighbourhood album is so heartstopper coded and wild is one of the tracks 😭)

My life currently consists of:

Drive to work with heartstopper playlist

Return from work and watch reels from the show / rewatch episodes

Read more comic (trying to spread it out so I get more but I am failing)

Constantly think about all of them until I fall asleep

Repeat

I'm just obsessed and it makes me so happy like I can't even explain it, I love it so much 💕🩷💕

[w0nd3rb0ii]

GOOOOOOD MORNING MY MENTALLY ILL POOKIES (5.5.2024)

my life is suchhh a mess helloooooo im back

im just gonna post a little life recap because last time i was actually active on here was like may

june '23: binged ALL MONTH but was like leftover skinny from getting down to like 118 , life was insane, partied a ton, rehearsals all the time, was 6 months into a relationship

july '23: kept on eatingggg, broke up w my gf and started dating this guy frankie (shameless namedrop) which was a whole like plot arc a year and a half in the making, wizard of oz happened (i was tin man), i went to x games, also new york!

august '23: disney trip w frankie, week long beach trip with my friend whos super hot and skinny and it made me sad but i got a tan and it was super fun overall, i was literally js getting fatter and fatter tho, so yea. also i went to scotland and got cast as ms trunchbull in matilda! also school started so that was fun

october '23: relationship was still slaying, i was still fat but not getting fatter, i went to hoco and school was schooling

november '23: mini relapse got me skinnyish, school existed

december '23: binged consistently, was ugly, bf was still amazing, school was scary but ended up fine

january '24: pregnancy scare started a christianity arc for me, i joined choir, i consistently was only eating like 400 cals and i was feeling pretty good ab my body but then after matilda show weekend i started binging like crazyyy (show weekend slayed but everyone got sick during tech week)

february '24: winter formal happened and was sm fun, dance comp season started, still fat, me and frankie went on a break at 7 and a half months because we could never see each other, spring semester started at school, i went to church camp and broke up with him on the way home because religious guilt about all the stuff we had done together (so we lasted almost 8 months)

march '24: aftermath of breakup was a lot, i auditioned for this crazy hard to get into choir at school AND GOT IN (!!!). kiiinda messed up God era because this guy i met at the start of spring semester and i started talking and it became a whole fwb thing WHICH WAS FUNNY because i definitely was not and am still not all the way over my ex. but me and the other guy started dating! (on my bday actually lol), ALSO I GOT CAST AS CINDERELLA IN CINDERELLA FOR MY LAST SHOW AT MY STUDIOOOO

april '24: still fat but i feel like ive gotten a little prettier recently, school is terrifying because i cant make myself do anything productive, me and the guy slaying but we got into like 2 fights over spring break but we fixed it both times! (it was my b bc i lied to him ab drinking and vaping), we went to the renaissance faire and it was sm fun!

may '24: i found out my ex bf might have been talking to another girl towards the end of a relationship, theyre going to prom together, theyre a thing now and its like really hurt which is dumb bc ive fully been in a relationship for like a month now but idk if im fully even in it because the bf is transferring and going to college in the fall and im staying at our community college bc performance opportunities and choir. and i kinda have a crush on the guy thats my prince for cinderella but im not doing anything about it because if anythings meant to come from it hes coming to my school next year soo yea well see idrc. but yeah so that happened, me and the current bf saw john mulaney last night, im js now getting back into caring ab my body because i do NOT WANT TO BE FAT FOR SUMMER. so yeah. idk how much i weigh. ill figure it out as soon as i can but my mom hid my scale. well seeee

so yea thats my update ill try to be active on here bye pookies

[misqnon]

do u ever get scared that maybe im lying to u about who i am... i wouldnt do that but i feel like if i had an anon that came off anon and revealed themself i would think "is it really u"... im not rly doing myself any favors by planting this idea in ur head but i want to know if u have thought abt it or not

SOMETIMES THAT IS HOW I AM.. not usually with zosan bc theyre not actually enemies.. theyre more like . rivals who argue a lot (and sometimes they try to kill each other for fun). but when its two characters who like.. idk.. killed each others families for example. i am thinking "get revenge.. kill them.. get revenge... revenge...." and revenge is NOT making out . revenge is NOT getting into a relationship..

ive never written any ship .. fanfic. so i dont think i could confidently write hanyagellan. i should though.. i should learn to write multiple characters. actually up until like. last month. i had never read fanfic that wasnt x reader. wait no thats wrong i HAD but it was characters i didnt know and purely bc i was bored. anyways if i am obsessed with fictional characters its usually bc i want to date them. and the ones i dont like like that r just blorbos, and i dont ship them with anyone. my first times actually shipping characters were basically.. me finding out phoenix wright and maya fey dont get together (i thought they were canon for some reason).. and it means its ok to ship wrightworth. and then enjoying satosugu content, a lot. both happened in the past 6 months or so

im actually kind of thinking kidd might have his time to shine in the next arc??? i wont say why but.. anyways heres hoping .

its mentioned one time in sabaody i think. that they have killed innocent civilians. and when i was rereading i was like "WOAH WAIT WHAT???? THE GUYS I FELL IN LOVE WITH ARE JUST REGULAR MURDERERS??" it was . a shocking moment. for sure. i filtered it out the first time bc i didnt really know kidd that well at the time. but NOW.. now... its different. ok wait i found the image

it doesnt change how much i like them but it is kinda a wake up call.. like thats right.. theyre... bad guys...

maybe marineford traumatized oda /j. like he had to go a while without his perverted cook and hot ladies and when he got them back he had the sanji reaction. maybe sanji is just his self insert. his reaction to being able to draw women again is sniffing them and bleeding out because of them

i have had a few moments where i really liked (mackenyu) zoro. when he smiled, once, i was like WOW ??? HELLO??? I LOVE U ... and then it was Gone.. i just need the silly guy to be silly. either way his action scenes are fantastic like. huge kudos to mackenyu for that. "zoro’s characterization seems to be one of the major criticisms ive seen across the board so maybe they’ll lighten him up for season 2." I HOPE SO!!! its not like hes doing an awful job or anything, im just sad abt the way the character has gone. make him smile a little more and joke around a little more and i will be happy as a clam or whatever that saying is. also excited for whatever the zoro saying fuck scene is.. i dont really notice cussing most of the time in media so i hope it doesnt slip past me

i heard koby's actor is trans?? i was very happy to hear that. excited for whenever we see him again in water 7 and hes all grown up. assuming the show goes for long enough to reach that point

actually i Did draw a fem sanji that i am willing to share bc its not too bad,, here u go. not like i did anything crazy with the design. its just sanji with boobs and longer hair.. and no facial hair. and also theres no obligation to do anything back. bc i was gonna draw fem sanji anyways. im only showing u bc i like u /p >:) otherwise it would never see the light of day

"luffy trying to pronounce the name of someone he doesnt care about be like" im so flattered to be compared to luffy HAHA even if its about his awful ability to remember names

"once i tried to see if there was some kind of website or plug in or tool to put in your email address and find any accounts linked to it so i could delete them but i didnt really find what i was looking for which is crazy." ive never thought to do that, but the fact there was nothing is so??? like dont other people have this issue?? idk if i have any really crazy websites i was on.. its more like the stuff i did when i had those accounts is crazy LOL

"blissful ignorance" fr. best to just ignore ur problems

"BUT I REMEMBERED THAT RUMIKO AT ONE POINT MENTIONED LIKING USAGI DROP AND I WAS LIKE. its so jover you guys" NOO THATS SO BAD... mangaka's please stop ruining ur characters and stories.. please........

"the nyan cat creator is actually here on tumblr lmao" THATS SO COOL.. time to see if they talk about it at all..

"also the vocaloid oliver voices puppycat in bee and puppycat! and a vocaloid song actually mde it into a MARVEL MOVIE??" I HEARD ABT THAT AND LIKE?? MARVEL... MARVEL... THE BIGGEST MOVIE FRANCHISE.. YEAH.... THATS INSANE..

"i could link my vocaloid megaplaylist but its. long." u should anyways .. if ur comfortable. the playlist i used most often to listen to music.. for years.. is 83 hours long. and it was just every single thing i liked. so. just letting u know the extent of how Not Picky i am

"i had one of the most fun times of my life lmao. i was JAMMIN." it sounds like a lot of fun!!! i hope kikuo comes back... so i can go see them... as. an actual fan next time .

"i think 90% of what oda says should be ignored LMAO. MY STORY NOW!! half joking. maybe a little more than half." Exactly!!! exactly!!! although i think his choice to not have any romance was a very good one so i will thank him for that.

"when the live action cast talks about how much they respect him and how cool meeting and talking to him was i almost feel bad bc he seems like a kind and goofy guy a lot of the time, but oof, man really needs to evaluate his biases…" I KNOW,, ME TOO. i saw uh.. iñaki ? meet him . and like.. man.. he seemed so happy. i love the guy. but it is tainted by my knowledge of who oda is.

i do also sometimes purposely bury posts.. im sorry u have to deal with the knowledge that i might see the things u dont want people to see .. also i will go ham spamming u since i have permission now. (im overhyping myself. i will probably spam a normal amount)

i actually resisted tiktok extremely well until like . 2022? maybe? and now ...i am addicted. im not actually but i AM on there a lot.

i think i was like 11? maybe? when i saw the impel down scene with iva . and i was still in denial about being trans for a while after that (i dont know what was going on in my child brain bc i came out as genderfluid 3 times at 11 12 and 13 i think. (i forgot each time. yeah.) and yet i was still like "nah im not trans.. thats not possible") and actually i made a fursona (without admitting it was a fursona. it was just an animal and i said "actually this is me...") and i made THEM genderfluid.. and while making it i was like . "no.. me?? im not genderfluid... but u can be. ur allowed to be ." anyways just a big tangent to say iva thank u for helping me accept myself it was a very long and confusing process but finally... i have a vague understanding of who i am...

i don't think oda would answer me but he HAS said multiple times that he reads every single letter he gets (thats been approved by.. idk.. his manager or something?). imagine being immortalized in sbs though.. i think it would be funnier to be trans and not ask a question involving it at all and when ur question gets answered u can come out and say "whats up suckers actually this was me. i bet u wish u were me huh." . idk, i will do anything to get back at transphobes...

"and iva is apparently based not only on dr frankenfurter but also a drag queen he knew irl?" i heard. i heard that the voice actor for iva IS the person iva is based on . and that he was arrested actually... for .. posting "indecent images" online. i thought that meant nudes but apparently he was just trying to show he has tattoos. on his lower half. and then he had to step down as a voice actor

'sometimes i think about how bon clay’s jacket just says "OKAMA” on the back and it can. sometimes be considered a slur?' i go back and forth a lot on how i feel abt the use of okama in one piece. like on one hand yeah,, queer people do use their own slurs. but sometimes its too much... like.. sometimes i feel weirdly targeted by it. i think part of that is probably bc ive had slurs used against me as slurs but. anyways he doesnt have to use it in EVERY SENTENCE describing a queer person.. right.. like we do have just regular descriptors besides "queer".. but then i have other times I'm like hell yeah!!! queer people!!!!! and i love that they use that word. idk. consistency is not my strong suit.

"2gether we can remember the fishman royal family LMAO." perfect. a team effort.

i dont remember exactly what noah is supposed to be , theyre a little vague about it (probably on purpose) but i do remember them talking about the dawn of the world quite a bit. the poneglyph in the fishman island arc is i think an apology to joy boy. and roger is involved bc he could hear the voices of the neptunians, like luffy can

the only layer of ur comic i understand is the horses sadly... once again my lack of knowledge rears its ugly head..

"i can see him doing this but only to zoro. to piss him off." either zoro wouldnt notice or he would and it would definitely turn into another fight. wait those are just the only two possible courses of action..

"usopp’s in on it probably" thank u. i feel like this was for me. even if it wasn't. thank u.

u can be.. uh.... judge of sanji... no maybe not.. that just reminds me of vinsmoke judge..

i have never understood powerscaling. i have a very slight understanding of what it is but. like. i dont know how thats fun.. for people... i have always enjoyed stories more when theyre focused on characters and settings rather than action. i love a good fight but it is nowhere near my priority. part of the reason i love dressrosa so much is cuz they have that stupid (/lh) moment where everyone starts working together to push back the birdcage. makes me cry every time.

anyways yeah i do think zoro is meant to be stronger. i think its kinda lame cuz the sanji and zoro rivalry, where theyre constantly on equal levels but hate to admit it, is fun. but at the same time i dont think i would mind if zoro was declared second in command and therefore became the stronger one. perhaps thats just my zoro bias showing though. making zoro 1 cm taller is VERY funny .. u know he would use that against sanji.. with the way he constantly lorded over people (sanji especially) that he was the first person to get to sabaody

"its the crack cocaine" this may be controversial.. but i would think that would STUNT their growth /lh. big mom as a child was like the same size as her parents. but with the proportions of a child. and once again i am faced with the question of . do huge characters come out normal sized and then just have insane growth spurts.. or.. the other, scary option: they come out huge. but their parents r usually normal sized... imagining that is terrifying

i like to try to form my own opinions and theories bc i think its fun but.. some ppl are just way smarter than me at reading characters. how do they do that!! the fact u were reading character analysis as a kid is impressive tho bc i was definitely in my "characters are only either evil or good" stage for a loooonnggg time.

u commiting hard vs me having commitment issues. who would win. thank u for excusing sanuso its the only sanji ship i actually like. I'm picky too and. sometimes i just hate a ship for no particular reason. i have tried to analyze myself but i cant figure it out

"i will do you one better and give u a link to the SBS + a translator who looked at the question." THATS PERFECT THANK U

i dont think i can meet oda halfway....

idk if this is popular or not but the reasoning ive seen behind trans zoro is that he took kuinas sword after she died, which is like. a metaphor for leaving behind his pre transition self. n i like that connection a lot. but also zoro as a transmasc is just fun..

also a while ago?? u reacted to zoro not hurting uhh the bird lady on punk hazard. i saw that when i was looking through ur liveblogging.. tags. and i wanted to say that. that made me really angry too LOL . like i expected better from u.. ur supposed to be the one who gives equal treatment no matter what. but then. partially for my own sanity. i started thinking that maybe he didnt actually hurt her not bc shes a lady,,, but because he doesnt like to hurt weak people. he has had a lot of moments where he's shown to protect weak people specifically, regardless of gender.

these comments.. helped me see the light (i hope theyre readable)

if oda does make him into the type of guy who protects women for being women. i might go insane. he had that moment in skypeia where robin got hurt and he was like "shes a woman" as if that makes any difference how strong she is or how easy an opponent should go on her. and wait i see ur point about the characters not acting like their own established .. character... i see it..

if ur interested here are my thoughts from the punk hazard moment. upon reread. i didnt remember it happened because i wiped it from my brain so my anger was just as intense as the first time LOL

tw for violent language and cussing

ok huge tangent aside

that summary from the zosan fic is so good. they r both trans . hell yeah.

i havent seen the matilda movie!! i havent read the books either. i do see ppl talk abt them a lot though and i have been meaning to give it a try. i like danny devito. i love theatre!! havent really seen many shows . especially not high production ones. but i was in theatre in middle and high school. thats Right im a theatre kid. except i was part of the backstage crew and never wanted to do acting.. no one talks about crew it makes me sad

i love trans family frobin and chopper. zoro is also definitely choppers big brother. i disagree with the popular headcanon of him being choppers dad. they r brothers.

i do not have any favorite creators tbh. im very non commital so i will usually only have videos i like or art i like or . yeah . i do have a few recurring one piece artists i reblog though? i think? (all on tumblr.. i dont really use social media). so let me get those for u,,,

attyattlaw

fluffyartbl0g

kiashieart

huyandere (shuggy my beloved)

and honestly i think thats it? i was mostly using tumblr for kpop content until very recently so i dont have much that is. one piece centered.. most of my interests are very different from each otherr,,,

never know how to end asks so here is how i feel about law

i feel like i am not popular enough for that to happen but . but

fear

okay yea thats valid. i dont think ive actually come across any enemies ships like that…i mean im sure i HAVE but i dont think i have shipped any?? well. well no thats not true. but. i was 14 and also stupid

my favorite characters are almost always characters i have a fictional crush on AND one of the half of my favorite ship…this probably says something about me but im choosing to ignore it. i dont know a lot about ace attorney but do phoenix and miles not have some sort of rivalry as well?? or do they become buddies by the end

someone told me they think kidd is gonna be king of the pirates?? did i say that before. i dont know why they think this but that in combination with u thinking he’ll get more screentime is. compelling

JDFBDSKS WOOPS !! its ok…luffy will reform them,..sometimes i think oda writes a character being terrible and then if it was long enough ago we just forget about it and pretend its ok. like.remember how franky beat the SHIT out of usopp AND robbed him and that was never really addressed aside from a few lines and he just joined the crew and has been a happy goofy guy since. i do. i MEAN ZORO ALSO WAS JUST MURDERING PPL FOR BOUNTIES BEFORE HE JOINED THE CREW and then luffy was like hey. stop that. and so he did and we dont talk about it much LMAO

I KNOW SANJI GOTTA BE HIS SELF INSERT. im sure he inserts himself in many of the characters but sanji hardcore. this video  talks a lot about it. including how oda’s signature has sanji’s eyebrow swirl. also i think that is why sanji sucks so much and i want to beat him to death with hammers . who said that

YEA MACKENYU IS LIKE. SO PRETTY. HI MACKENYU,..HI. i think what bothered me most is that (esp pre ts) zoro was a very angry and loud character. he laughs loudly, he yells when he’s mad, he gets those big silly angry faces oda draws all the time. he’s quieter post ts but when he gets mad he still gets Loud yanno. zoro is boisterous. but opla zoro is always talking at Edgy Cool Boy Mumble. for reference the fuck is about buggy. which is so funny

koby’s actor IS trans!! i really like the casting they’ve gone with. For doing their races right, first of all, and also for things like giving koby’s role to a trans actor even though they didnt “have to”. and also i will now HC koby as trans thank u matt owens. i doubt they’ll get to water 7 (i think they might like. finish alabasta. and thats it. personally) but i mean WHO KNOWS. 

TRANS SANJI….OH MY GOD HI,,, HELLO MA’AM…GOD I WISH SHE WAS REAL. ODA…COWARD!!! YOU PUT HIM ON FORCE FEMME ISLAND AND IT DIDNT EVEN WORK /j

thank you for showing me!!  :D 

i think there were SOME options but they either required an account or cost money or didnt do the whole job so i kinda gave up. it is weird bc that seems like a very useful tool in this day and age

here…here is my vocaloid megaplaylist…it…pretty much is just every vocaloid song i liked. there’s a couple vocaloid-adjacent songs in there too. enjoy

i actually really like making playlists for ppl (vocaloid or otherwise) so if u ever want a more. condensed playlist of something. let me know!

kikuo is already doing more stuff in the u.s. so i bet he will come back!! i hope he does i spent like $50 on his merch so like I FUNDED IT

inaki meeting oda WAS very sweet imo…some people have said it seemed fake/forced but i didnt get that vibe at all. and oda does seem like a nice and funny person like. in real life. but again I KNOW WHAT U FUCKING THINK IN UR BRAIN…nuance and al that i guess.

i literally reblogged a nsfw comic the other day (it was a joke comic, but still) and i was like i will bury this. and queue it for 1 am. i am so safe. AND NOW I DO NOT FEEL SAFE!! im joking i dont care that much. but tumblr why

how did you…how did u forget u were gendrfluid 3 times…actually. actually im REALLY bad about putting a label on my gender so i cant talk. i used to say “girl with a little agender on the side” or something and then went by demigirl kinda for a while? and then people would ask my gender and i’d be like “idk its whatever man” and my friends would go “i thought u were a demigirl?” and id be like OH FUCK OH YEA but now its evolved and i still dont have a name for it. im one of those ‘no labels’ people now but only bc i dont feel like looking into it more. lazy moment. and labels feel too definitive. 

u should do that actually. a couple of his sbs people have gotten pretty popular for frequent comments i think. also I DIDNT KNOW THAT ABOUT IVA VA??? WHAT THE FUCK

PFFT dont worry about not understanding the comic its fairly niche. the song lyrics are from this song (very explicit btw. also a bop imo) and the “lipsync for your life” bit is a reference to rupauls drag race when the queens have to perform to a song to not get eliminated. and i like to imagine iva put sanji through many a gay time

“wait those are the only two possible courses of action..” I USE THAT SAME PHRASE A LOT AND ACCIDENTALLY DO THAT SAME THING EVERY TIME LMAO

fuck…but it would work so well with my gavel…damn it…im uh uh…magistrate of sanji, (i literally googled judge synonyms for this. and also it made me think about that one vocaloid song where kaito is a judge)

i rlly dont care about powerscaling and i have never looked into it and never will. i actually really do like cool fights but in anime they always get dragged out SOO long and then im just pissed cause i care more about the plot and characters. i prefer the idea of them being perfectly matched for multiple reasons but i guess we’ll never know…probably. idk im still waiting on that death pact thing to come back

u make a good point. about the cocaine. maybe it has to do with haki/willpower. tbh i can see that. the powerful guys are always taller. i think oda just wants them to be intimidating but if we want an in canon explanation…its cause theyre so damn AMBITIOUS !!

i was reading character analysis as a kid but i also thought characters could only be one or the other for way too long. bisexuality of man or whatever

what other ships do i like…i like zosan. obviously. i like dofuwani for similar reasons but I WAS LIED TO AND SHIPPED IT BEFORE I MET THEM AND THOUGHT THEY INTERACTED WAY MORE..OH WELL. i like nami/vivi and kaya/usopp!! and frobin!! buggy and shanks can be cute too. but i dont really CARE much about any of them except zosan. any luffy ship be gone from my sight for aroace reasons. wait add hannyagellan

im ngl hannyagellan is like a funny joke ship to me but if it becomes one of those crack ships u acciddentally get attached to im gonna be so mad (i wont be mad itll be really funny)

ive never heard that but i like that interpretation. god. i think about kuina a lot. i miss her. this is so stupid but i was listening to “slipping through my fingers” by abba and makin amvs in my head of zoro losing kuina and shit…embrassing. and also made me emo. 

hm…im torn on the punk hazard stuff. to me it def felt like a woman thing esp after that comment about robin in skypiea. i think it goes against zoro’s character esp considering UHH KUINA but its yet another symptom of oda’s own biases bleeding into the work. but i would have to watch it again and consider it being a weakness thing. though i feel like he’s had weak men challenge him before that he didnt make a big deal out of not fighting. or maybe i just feel like if it was a guy he wouldnt hesitate as much…im blanking on evidence

2 OUT OF 3 OF MY ROOMATES IN COLEGE WERE ON TECH CREW HAHAHA  they told me about it and made me appreciate it!! i love theatre a lot. i want to go see more. thats the only one ive ever seen and its bc it was for a school trip. my favorite musical ever is cabaret and i watched it all on youtube in several parts jdfnvkfjn (the 1990’s run with alan cumming) i could have been a theatre kid if i was less shy i think.

I AGREE ZORO IS CHOPPERS BROTHER. THANK U. although if we’re talking crew dynamics overall i do not think robin is a mother. she is 100% a cool aunt. and actually not that responsible when it comes to wrangling luffy and crew. franky’s a dad but he’s not THEIR dad. he’s just a dad coded guy who they’re friends with. jinbei gives grandfather even though hes only in his 40’s. brook is weird uncle. nami is a mom. sanji is also a mom. zoro is a big brother and usopp and luffy and chopper are little brothers. 

i made my irl friend get on tungle and she also uses it for kpop purposes lmao. i know very little about kpop but she likes ateez…my other friend likes stray kids…i had a friend who liked shinee and i liked one of their songs…i like a few bts songs…but i will never join that fandom (sorry mack if ur reading this)

i think in terms of like one piece videos i like melonteee, totally not mark, mugiwara no goofy (for laughs) and also these two guys who just shitpost and its really funny

one piece artists,,,so many. wellfine is a big one…i love when ppl draw sanji with a hooked nose and lots of body hair. bluechanas…demonzoro…chvvy…that translation blog i linked earlier. i actually have a lot more but i realized a lot of them are just zosan and i didnt want to subject you to . all that 🧍LMAO. WAIT I FORGOT ONE. THEMETALHIRO. THEIR COMICS ARE SO FUNNY ALL THE TIME

i feel the need to ask a one piece question but i cant think of one rn. uh. uh. do u have any questions. or discussions to start. its ok if u dont!!

also p.s. there is never any pressure to watch any of the videos i link it is more for a sourcing purpose unless u actively want to watch them

I HAVE THAT EXACT IMAGE SAVED IN MY CAMERA ROLL LMAO. to end off here are some of my best (worst) sanji images

[redxblueihateloveyou]

Omg thank you so much for your posts about rinharu!! :"")) I was one of those people who were like "why are rinharu fighting again?? Did kyoani purposely seperate them /again/ just for the sake of drama ?? (And so that they have more oppurtunities to showcase other ships??)" I was really irked at first cuz i thought the first part of TFS is finally going to be a movie about rinharu being a powercouple, but! After reading your posts i realised that haru never really moved on from rin leaving, even in S3 the reason why hiyori's words affected him was because he thought he caused rin to leave (and by extension ikuya, but lbr haru wasn't as frustrated with ikuya nearly as much as he was with rin right) so i'm just here to say.. thank you so much for opening my eyes!!! Now i'm really looking forward to the second part!!

Awww no problem <3 tbh I've always said that free is one of those that has so many nuances left bts that it's sometimes confusing for those who aren't as invested I think. Like there's so many important things that are left out and are in additional materials, that some has no idea what's going on at times. Like back in the days when some interpreted s2 in the opposite way bc of that one thing. My point is that not everyone is even watches stuff like recaps for example (where there are in fact new easter eggs and so many important things like Rin's dad death aftermath etc), and even less read novels and checked side stories and dramas.

For example, in books this Haru's issue about him thinking he's cursed and hurts everyone with his swimming is a huge thing, when Asahi "lost his ability to swim" after seeing Haru's free. But in SD it wasn't adressed at all tbh.

And what Haru feels for Rin is such tornado of emotions, that surprised even me with all the descriptions, bc like it's real bad. Like that part I posted from the chapter when Rin leaves is at least understandable, since he leaves. But the way he reacts to him in general even when he just appears in his sight is always described as if someone tortures him for real lol. And he's always like "pls someone save me, I don't know how to deal with this, bc I've never felt such emotions before".

So basically, like yeah, he's as it is has this thing, when he thinks of himself as some bad omen, so he's very sensitive about it, but since everything Rin-related feels x100000000 for him, its just... well, it hurt for a very long time and sadly was just overlooked by a certain someone, so here we are.

I think we all at first believed that bc Rin's so shocked and in disbelief that Haru could even think that it was his fault in some way:

that maybe they talked about it bts or smth like after the relay. But it seems like Rin either forgot or most likely I think he maybe thought that Haru understood without words? I'm just real sad still that Haru didn't get to hear this speech:

I mean, they made it look by the end of s1 that it was about relay, which partially yeah, but for Rin it was really about Haru. You see what he said.. he said that that 1x02 race with Haru alone.. what made him want to swim again. This whole speech was not only about the fact that Haru wasn't at fault that he quit swimming in the first place, but about the fact that Haru is his lucky charm, that makes everything better. AND WE DIDN'T EVEN GET TO HEAR THAT. So like for Haru it's to this day like "after I messed him up, Rin was saved with the power of friendship and a relay". But he was saved by Haru really. Bc according to s3 info, it was basically just about Haru being on the relay team. I don't try to demean their friendships or anything, but its just what it is.

And as I've said before in one post it's just fascinating that to this day Rin for example thinks that s1 shananigans were just about him and just his problem:

Haru thought it was about them and their problem:

So like my point here is I also up to the end of s2 thought that maybe Rei or Rin told that to him, bc we seemed to move on to another problems, until in Kizuna we were shown that he still dreams about that scene of Rin leaving. s3 Hiyori just exposed the wound really.

But also once again see what he said there, it's not just about that one time he keeps reliving, aka his first come back, its really just about each time Rin was leaving. Like the very first one already was bad, the second was the worst, bc he thought he hurt him and thought that bc of him he quit swimming, others are just painful bc by then it was already another kind of feeling. I mean, I do think that this first Rin's return to Australia thing needs to be cleared up since it's obviously still haunting him. But again it's just part of this. Haru after the Australian trip and "I've always admired you" and "without you I have nothing to aim for" and after TYM goodbye when Rin told him that he doesn't need a surprise party and that just swimming with Haru before leaving is the greastest surprise for him, he knows already about the way Rin feels about swimming with him... I think the reason why everyone is freaking out here is that bc the way it's executed it's just really about him constantly missing him and "why am I always have to longingly watch you leave, while you seem fine." If he was in a free race, but wasn't on a relay team, he'd get the same reaction. Its just all seasons combined that brought us here. We already in 3x01 without Hiyori knew that he wasn't handling Rin being far away again good. So tbh it's logical even without any explanation really. I mean, Rin does indeed leave and come back as he pleases and does what he wants without holding back or sometimes thinking about consequences. There's no lie here.

It's like since the beginning for Rin it was like "I found the gorgeous guy I adore and I want to swim with, I'll transfer schools just to nag him into swimming with me, it's not like he's gonna care if I leave after that." (he literally in the book didn't think it was a big deal)

For Haru it was like "I lived just fine, but this guy stormed into my life, made me want things I didn't think I'd ever want, got me addicted to him and then dropped me like a hot potato".

Rin's just very passionate about life and things he wants, like Haru for example, but he's really also very unobservant and very clueless at times.

But like just bc he doesn't know about Haru's existential crisis and all the pain he's truly in when he's leaving, doesn't change the fact that he at times didn't even treat him as a simple friend (because they can't be just friends I KNOW), but still things like "you could've called" "well sorry, I guess I'm just not good at it" are probably hurtful, considering the fact that you are good at it with everyone else tho, Rin sweetie. Like thanks for avoiding us the most and holding back and visiting us the last each time, we feel real special. Haru is like the opposite, he doesn't call anyone for example, but he can call Rin in the middle of the night if needed, he always does for Rin smth that's completely out of his comfort zone.

It's like some say "Rin didn't know he wanted him to call" or "he didn't know Haru felt guilty". He did know he wanted him to call and he didn't know Haru felt guilty and stopped swimming competitively when he stopped swimming, but then Rei told him and Natsuya in 3x03 reminded him about this too. Its just the fact that he doesn't want to add 1+1 and thinks "well, there's no way I can affect Haru like that right?", "he can't be that upset about Rin Matsuoka, right?". While facts are he IS literally the only one who affects Haru in such huge way. It's like everyone else can just pass him by and it's nothing, but he walks by and it's a whole "asdfghgfdsa why my body is on fire, its just Rin who's just standing there".

And I'm also buffled by this thing that some people really say stuff like "where did this come from, they were perfectly fine" etc, as if they ever had normal "friendship" relationship. I'm like when did they ever behave themselves okay? In 3x03 Rin is dying to call Haru, but can't do it, while he's constantly texting everyone including Nagisa. First thing he says in the airport when he comes back is "I'm home, Haru" to air, but then goes to hang out with Makoto and Sousuke, desperately looking for an excuse to see the one whom he from the beginning, as it was shown wanted to see the most, but in his opinion can’t without a reason. It's only when Makoto tells him that Haru was upset about Albert he quickly rans off out of there bc "hooray, I have an excuse to see my bae”. Like we know from the airport scene that he wanted to see Haru the most. If they're so as people say were doing great, than how do you exlain all of their s2 and s3 behavior for real? It's like as if in TYM Haru didn't lose his shit from some gossip about persimmons. I mean, they never settled anything really. And Haru is constantly scared of Rin leaving again since forever.

So it's complicated, but yes, we're super excited for p2, bc asdfghjhgfds.

[icharchivist]

I LOVE MISUMI SO MUCH AND I WANT TO GIVE HIM A HUG. okay deep breaths now. uh. i went through captain sky's pirates! for the longest time i misread the play title and was CONVINCED they were like sky pirates like they were all in airships and stuff and honestly. i actually didnt realize they weren't in flying ships until i watched the play which was over halfway thru reading the event. um. clearly i was hoping too hard that i ignored everything else lol. but seriously... why else would the captain be named sky...

anyways gosh. its been a whole 3 months since clockwork heart! now that it's summer (fitting season for this troupe lol) im gonna go thru some more a3 though i think. let's see the actual event...

well first off the lil intro with part of the older summer troupe's play did make me go and read the first chapter of one piece haha. just for the Vibe. the paper airplane competition they had was so fun and i personally related w/ tenma prototyping his paper airplanes and having it absolutely suck because that's so me like taking something so extremely seriously that i forget that precision engineering isnt like actually feasible so all this theory is functionally useless and that i also don't know any aerodynamics theory in the first place. but also “don’t you know that paper airplanes fly farther if you put all your love into them!?” this is so funny i could never say that. pfft i just looked back to the notes i was taking and i was like "oh its paper airplanes because SKY pirates!!!!" i cannot read apostrophes.

i also was like "omg tsuzuru didn't faint immediately" only for everyone to also comment the same thing haha so i knew that wasn't gonna last... i mean i assumed he was trying not to faint bc he wanted to talk abt that original script paper thing but i also noticed that he faints very specifically after people compliment him on it so i like to think he was so relieved that his body gave out.

when they're discussing the play there's a part where yuki talks abt costuming and kazunari talks about like the design colors and the accents and stuff and i was just like !!! bc it's like! that's what sardine search started! with kazunari discussing design aspects with yuki... and now he feels comfortable enough to just talk about it! i loved how natural that was.

also it's been a while since i went through the og summer troupe bc i was sitting there like "wait did people not KNOW misumis grandpa did scripts?" like i didnt remember the script thing specifically but i remember he was an important mankai person for sure. bc its like.... well, why else was misumi living there huh.

i was very happy muku was the second lead in the play! although i am kind of sad tenma didnt play francoise lol... literally i was sitting up in my seat like. my fic idea of tenma saying he'd play a female role real??? but i guess the short jokes wouldn't have worked then.

and then for most of this event i felt Deeply Concerned for misumi and wanted to give him a hug. like it's all like it was a cute "tenma's scared of ghosts!" thing when they found him but also he was just living out there alone? he’s got great athletic skills but how long has he been living out there alone. I’m really asking how long. he's not that old how long was it. his grandfather died six years ago it how long has misumi been living alone how long has he been on the run. “gramps was the only one who didn’t abandon me. he was the one who made sure I wasn’t alone.” i am so worried about him. and misumi's whole thing with not being able to remember hakkaku's face Really got me! like that's just such a painful thing and like. idk. personally as someone who can really only visit some of my relatives very rarely i definitely get him.

anyways the treasure map! that was so cute. also i didn't remember how muku and kazunari's room looked,, it was so fresh feeling. oh wow! muku and kazunaris room looks so fresh and nice. tenma hiding a self help directionally challenged book is also so hilarious. yuki re: yuzo “how is that geezer always so free? does he really have a job?” how are YOU free, yuki??? you have TWO jobs (acting, costuming) AND ur a student!

when they couldn't find the last treasure box i immediately called it like "i bet what he liked most was being able to hear the troupe perform. bc those precious memories w/ his friends is what he treasures most" and i pretty much nailed it on that account i feel. i am so glad madoka is the one who showed up to meet muku and izumi bc he is actually a good kid which made me feel so relieved. the my master's mesmerized by mystery event made me cry because i felt so bad for homare and this made me emo but i didn't cry which is great. also when muku and izumi first try to talk to him i think it's so funny that muku's like "maybe tenma and yuki would have done better..." if u let tenma and yuki do it they would have gotten arrested 100%.

still i got extremely sad when madoka was like "“so he’s still alive…” like izumi’s inner voice is like oh! he’s smiling hearing about him! guess he doesn't hate him after all :) meanwhile fucking sirens going off in my brain like madoka had literally no assurance on whether his brother was alive or dead. what the hell. anyways the “…if I always hung around such a weird person, I’d start acting like one, too.” i want to engage misumi's parents in mortal combat. that's such a real feeling tho, i definitely remember growing up like madoka with regards to parents being like don't be like your older sibling AT ALL (though not to such a serious extent as him). even the way he immediately picks out st.flora by saying that's where smart people go...

after they got the final treasure box back i finally watched the play lol... moments that stood out to me. misumi's outfit is GREAT although i wish there were triangles on it. i think it is SO funny that blackbeard is not only a woman but their name is francoise. that's so funny to me. like they're not even elegant enough for that name when they're not disguised. also henry being like "ya u guys were too miserable to steal from so I hung around" is so funny to me. and misumi is like. not even that tall in comparison to muku and yuki which is so funny to me. so i like to imagine when sky is like "the smaller they are, the more famous they be" he like solemnly takes off his platform boots like it'll gain him instant fame somehow. also jonny gives massive unpaid intern vibes to me. also with the whole triangle island thing and the treasure box... are we sure tsuzuru is not like a precog or something because there's similarities to real life and there's this which is something else.

and the paper airplane coming back at the end was so cute! though... misumi's father works for mr.kamikizaka... that's the god troupe guy! god. also im squinting at when misumis dad is like do paperwork and im like. is this guy... profiting off of his kid's script labor? or is he perhaps repurposing hakkaku's scripts... evil. madoka please be safe.

some other minor notes i did NOT miss yuzo going "back then, he was still…” um sir. have something to say abt izumi's dad perhaps? i'm realllly curious as to why the whole mankai troupe went no contact. the ending with the fireworks was so cute! the whole summer triangle thing, too, like god. they are all just Best Friends and that is their treasure! it's so sweet. also the way summer troupe makes fun of tenma like very nicely bc tenma is just like so. bluffs all the time but is also stupid sweet to the troupe is like... idk. i love it when tenma and yuki bicker it just feels like something that grounds the team it feels so natural yknow? it's so nice. also i listened to the song for this play and the inst is so fun!

that's about all the thoughts i had... just three events between me and nocturnality now :)

MISUMI EVENT LET'S GOOOOO

it's already long so, my own reply/thoughts under the cut :3c

Misumi deserves all the hugs in the world and that's final! god. AND HELP THE MISREAD. To be fair there IS a pirates in spaceships play way further down the line (tho it was never covered by the EN server) so it's not THAT far fetched. I feel like "Captain Sky" works for Misumi in the sense of both, freeing himself from his family in a way that can be aiming for the sky, and in general the fact Misumi finds a lot of solace in the nightsky especially. We see it in this event with his love for the summer sky and especially the summer triangle, which, for him, equals his ultimate happiness, but also how he has a fascination with the moon as we see from his crossbackstage with Tsumugi. Angstily, i could imagine that at a time his loneliness was at its peak he found himself some happiness in looking at the Sky, so eventually this name can be an extention of that: of this freedom but also of this sense of belonging that he found there. But if any of that is to take for granted it also means we need to start considering that Tsuzuru is a witch for figuring it out. That's a thing.

BUT YAY welcome back, it's so good to see you again :3c it's always a pleasure to see you go through a3!

And omg for the vibe that's pretty sweet. And YEAH the paper airplane is so cute!! Also a call back to the fact a competition also happens in Misumi's base SR's backstage i think? and just, man the way it comes back to haunt us. But RIP on you relating to Tenma in that moment this is so funny. Tho it's really honestly pretty sweet especially to see Tenma being so… childish. I've rewatched the anime recently and by god, Tenma gets to be so silly and participate in so many childish things as time goes by that i forgot just how much he had to play the adult for his job and how he denied himself some happiness like this unless it was for acting in movies. So everytime he gets to have silly moment like that my heart melt. Sweet kid… (also if you want to suffer i have to let you know that the Stageplay of a3 has Misumi and Madoka have a duet about paperplanes: part 1 & part 2 )

HELP THE TSUZURU THING. Tsuzuru fainting best running gag, i'm sorry Tsuzuru for your suffering but we must all admit it's endlessly funny. Also i love that you pick up he collapses as soon as he's complimented. The relieve from the stress that was basically holding him awake for that time help.

AND YEAH GOD THE YUKI AND KAZUNARI THING. honestly this is what solds me so much on those events and that i can't imagine skipping directly to act 2's main story: not only the characters grow a LOT during those events but you get to also see the direct results of how it affected them. From Sardine Search we know Yuki was doing it all on his own and was overwhelming himself and Kazunari didn't feel like he could share his design ideas with Yuki, and in the end the two of them realizing they can lift each other up by being a support on that regard, and the fact that Yuki especially opened enough to let Kazunari have a place in his creative process, that the closed off kid opened up and that the kid who wouldn't know how to assert himself now find his place proposing ideas to Yuki and seeing the two of them discussing on tandem, and being so excited and building each other up… god!!! this is so good. I love to see them heal and grow after each event and keeping the lessons they learnt up. It's so touching.

And omg yeah i think Misumi mentions gramps but like, in a whisper? And even Izumi isn't sure she caught it. So the rest of Summer doesn't specifically get it, i think? i'm not sure, else Izumi heard it. I know the anime did away with it with just, not having Misumi bring it up at all DLKFJDLF but yeah! people didn't know! but yeah like, this is also the obvious thing as to why Misumi felt he could come living here help.

Muku being second lead was SOOO good, i'm so happy with seeing him becoming more assertive and confident on that regard. He did shine so well after all of this! And DLKFJLDKFJ Be the change you want to see in the world, go write this fic! Tenma deserves it. But yeah alas they needed to mock Yuki on his heigh, typical. (Tsuzuru revenge fantasy of making fun of Yuki's heigh as payback for the Villager C thing)

And god yeah… yeah. Misumi's whole story is seriously so heartbreaking. I think a3 works the line between comedy and tragic very well in a way, where Misumi's introduction was really funny because it was burrying the leads of the implications of how tragic it is that he's there thanks to how silly the situation was, and then, when finally it addresses the tragic it's like oh. right. that was here from the start i forgot. For how long Misumi had run off, he does mention that he's been here since "before there started to be noise in the theater", which means he has been here for at least before Spring. Initially i would have thought it meant that he must have been here for a couple of months before Spring started to act there, if he can take this event as a temporal mark. But then thinking about it, Matsukawa mentions that the room has been haunted for a very long time and that's why he never came in and it makes me wonder if Misumi's marks aren't skewed by loneliness to the point it means nothing: could have been years since he's there. Which makes more sense as to why Madoka thought he was dead. If Misumi had been gone only for a year or so, i feel like this wouldn't have been Madoka's first thought, so……….. Personally i'm inclined to think he perhaps stayed one or two years after his gramps death with his family and the more lonely he felt + the grief, the more he felt he couldn't stand it, and eventually he came back to the one place that could make him think of the only person who made him feel like home: Mankai. This was my Detective Work™ of "trying to read between the lines but especially between my tears" But yeah man him forgetting Hakkaku was so sad 😭 poor kid.

The tresure map part of the event was adorable! I love the tidbits into seeing the other summer people being silly in that search, it was adorable. AND HELP at roasting Yuki there :sob:

And waaa you know their heart so well 😭 And oh boy Madoka. he's such a good kid…. I'm glad at least you kept yourself emotionally stable! this is a plus because this event personally just murders me in more way than one. ALSO HELP "i think it's so funny that muku's like "maybe tenma and yuki would have done better…" if u let tenma and yuki do it they would have gotten arrested 100%. " this killed me on the spot. you're 100% correct.

And GOD yeah. yeah Madoka's reaction raises a hundred of red flags about his parents this is terrible. AND YEAH let's engage Misumi's parents in mortal combat this is so fucked up. Like the implications of both how they isolated Misumi, making him know he was too weird for them, isolating Madoka from him, Madoka being too young probably to process it other than "i don't want to shame my parents so i'll do what they tell me even if i don't understand why" and only realizing how fucked up it was once Misumi was gone, but even so, the fact he thought he was dead probably means his parents are either telling him so, or that they just never bring him up at all and so he jumped to conclusion. It's honestly really fucked up.

As for relating to the situation, oof. I feel you for that. And yeah little tidbits about me but my elder sibling ran away from home when i was 6yo never to be seen again and yeah, so, this event did a particular amount of psych dmg to me in a way i could never anticipate. I related a lot to Madoka's situation on that regard, and perhaps project some of the uglier aspects of what a situation like this means on him, but by god. This is so cruel. And like, out of this experience, Madoka was having the "don't be like your brother" when he was still here which in itself was damaging, but with on top of that him running away it adds another level of pressure on Madoka of "not abandonning the family like my brother did". There's this type of pain that, even if you manage to process that it was for the best that they left because you eventually process how badly the family has treated him (and perhaps even you in the process), the absolute pain of the abandon, of being left behind, and especially feeling responsible on "if i wasn't a silly kid who pushed him away perhaps he would still be here, but also, wouldn't it have been more pain for him?" and therefore not wanting to put your family through that again, and just. Listen. Madoka is a mess. I'm claiming Madoka i'm giving him so many psych problem, my city now. So even if his family would be better off without Misumi, the idea, the social stigma, of the younger doing the same, would in itself be either a present or a subtextual pressure on Madoka and god this kid must be going through it. And on top of that "even if he manages to process it was for the best" is something he can only do NOW that he knows Misumi is alive. Honestly Madoka's relief made him take it in in such a mature and graceful way for such a kid. takes deep breath sorry this event touched on something extremely primeval in me and it makes me take it in all of the complex ways, and honestly it baffles me how well a3 did capture this experience. Because goodness it's an insane one, and for a minor character (at this point at least) i feel like they did such a good job to portray some nuances on that regard. And back to Misumi it's also just a nightmare for him as well, he had to sacrifice his little brother to be able to move on and be happier, but also with the belief his brother, whom he loves dearly, hated him. It must be so painful when he gets to think about it and it's just. god. so much.

aNYWAY, the play now. It's sUCH a fun play i love it so much. but yeah mood Misumi deserved more triangles. AND HELP THE COMMENTS ON FRANCOISE. Very true, very true. i LOVE Henry in this play, he's so so funny and honestly seeing pure and cute Muku play "Bloody Henry" was incredible. I love how we can still buy him. Innocent face to hide his bad intentions yeah? so good. Muku ever since he joined Mankai like "i want to play a prince, but if i can't i will be the biggest thug of the play", godspeed baby. "so i like to imagine when sky is like "the smaller they are, the more famous they be" he like solemnly takes off his platform boots like it'll gain him instant fame somehow." THIS IS SO FUNNY this is the only way i'll picture it now. And god right, such a good play. AND YEA LEGIT TSUZURU IT'S BECOMING TERRIFYING. Tsuzuru doesn't write, he gets possessed by the spirit of whoever is going to be the lead of that play and suddenly he writes something that will force you to face an intense buried trauma whenever you want it or not. Fucking terrifying.

The ending was really adorable as it is. And yeah oof the fact the father works for the God Troupe really makes it so sour. Even if Misumi and Madoka manages to patch things up they still have this thing separating them… how unfair. And yeah i read it that way too of, the father profiting of his son's writing. Whenever Madoka writes from Hakkaku's plays or are 100% original, he's clearly being exploited lol. but hey "don't disappoint me like your brother" must be a hell of a motivation. Dipshit. I will fight their parents myself. and Adopt Madoka. That's the least i can do.

And god yeah. yuzo still so mysterious… share your secret with us. Please. we need to know. I really want to know toooo. And YEAH THE FIREWORKS WERE SO CUTE. I'm so glad it's becoming a tradition for them, it's honestly so so adorable. And the summer triangle really pushed Misumi's obsession with triangle from cute to so meaningful i'm bawling everytime he talks about them. IT's such a sweet scene. And the fact he finds all of his friends to be his treasure is just. bites fist. it's adorable i'm so happy for them. And yeah god, re what i was saying at the begining i love to see Tenma just being silly and having a good time. I remember some Itaru's minichat where he also brings it up (try this link) and it's so soft to me. and yeah god mood, i love their bickering, i love this troupe, it has such a nice dynamic and vibe and you can feel them just. being much happier everytime they get to be together. It's so sweet. I love them. And the song for this play is SOOOO GOOd, Misumi's voice actor went off with it it's so pretty. Also i've seen it live and by god. He goes ham it's 😳 okay!

Thank you once again for sharing all of your thoughts, it's really always a pleasure to read them ❤❤❤❤ The a3 experience will always bring tears to my eyes truly.

And owo Nocturnality soon!!!! The very normal event that i can be soooo normal about. Normality. LEt's GOO

OH and the next 3 have some of my fav moments but also i feel like i've been saying this about every a3 events DLKJFDKLFJDFLK. At least the good thing with a3's event is that even when it's not about your fav you will always find something worth your emotions. So great. Can't wait to see your thoughts on what follows :3c

Thank you once again for sharing it all ❤❤❤ have a nice day!

[lesbianmarrow]

okay okay time to talk about legends of tomorrow 5.07 “mr parkers cul-de-sac.” i watched it twice bc i liked it so much. it has lots of thoughts on love and its consequences, and what you’re willing to do for love. all that mushy stuff hehe. 

fun to have damien darhk back as a guest star for this episode. i think he is always most sympathetic when the focus is on his love for his daughter, and this episode really leans into that. i like that we get him back for this episode now that we have seen this radical change and development in nora as she has been allowed to grow outside of her father’s influence and she has taken control of her life. like it’s definitely the most interesting time to bring him back. and i like that they bring him back not as a master manipulator villain but as a dad. because again that ended up being the most compelling aspect of his character when he was last on the show. they do of course showcase the villain aspect of him when he has his wizard battle with constantine and then again when he finds out the truth and attacks all the legends, and i think that works well too. good balance of silly and cruel. when he commits suicide at the end that did really get to me. and i like that even after he has made up with the legends sara still refuses to shake his hand bc hes still the man who killed her sister. that feels right for her. 

it’s been sort of running in the background this season but this storyline of nora taking control of her life and finding a sort of healing and catharsis in helping children is so excellent. it’s often shown as being kind of silly bc shes in this ridiculous costume granting children frivolous wishes but on a deeper level it is also so touching. i think it makes perfect sense for her to be confronted with her father again now, because part of what she is healing from is his negative influence on her, and yet there is still so much love between them. nora finally getting the courage to tell her dad that she isn’t the person he wanted her to be, but she is happy and thriving, is like the natural conclusion of her arc of personal reinvention. and then they talk it out and it all turns out well :) i mean damien ends up back in hell but that’s kind of where he belongs so it’s fine. 

despite being a lesbian i AM a big fan of the ray/nora romance and it was sweet to see how much they love each other in this episode. there is something sort of strange about how their relationship struggle in this episode sort of feels like a gay cliche even though theyre straight?? like how nora is hiding ray from her father bc he wouldn’t accept him, and how that little kid tells ray that you shouldn’t be ashamed of who you love. idk i thought it was kind of funny. often in these cw shows i get a bit annoyed at how characters will be so quick to propose marriage but in this case i think it makes sense with ray and nora. they already kind of were acting like a married couple and they just are so good together. their impromptu wedding was so cute. the ending of the episode hints that ray is gonna leave the team, which would be sad because i like him, but it makes sense that getting married would necessitate leaving the team.  

i wasn’t liking the mick/ally romance bc i am a believer in gay mick theory but i did enjoy the revelation that mick has a daughter now. it just feels like a fun and unique challenge for him to have to face. the scene where he is eating cake and zari criticizes him for running from the truth made me really feel for him. because he claims that he’s staying away because he would be a bad influence on his daughter, but really we know that he’s staying away because this kind of relationship is so new to him and he’s scared. even though mick is often a very silly character i think the more serious emotional stuff with him can be very impactful so i’m excited to see how this storyline goes. there’s also something sort of poignant about zari being the one to witness this family reunion and then urge mick to go be in his daughter’s life, since as we know zari 1.0 lost her family and changed history to bring them back. 

i’m noticing this motif of circles. i noticed it first in 5.05 when constantine gets lung cancer and we get the match cut of the hell lady messing with his soul token to the shot of him lying on the floor that has a circular design. and i thought that was just a one time thing but then in the next episode constantine has a circular rug that ray pulls aside to reveal a pentagram and i was thinking hmm. and then in this episode there’s all this talk of circles in the mr parker’s cul-de-sac theme song, about how circles represent eternity, so now i’m positive there’s something there. plus i remembered in 5.05 the young ghost versions of constantine and natalie we see are weaving on a circular loom. and then at the beginning of this episode the illustration of the loom of fate we see is sort of cylindrical or circular. it’s all connected!!!!!! since circles have this symbolic meaning of eternity or of the cycle of death and rebirth i think it makes a lot of sense for legends to use it as a motif. i will be on the lookout for circles in upcoming episodes!!!! 

ok that’s all for this post. i have more to say about sara & ava but i’ll save that for its own post. but yeah this episode was such a favorite of mine even though it was a lot of silly shenanigans i just really enjoyed all the love and mushiness. 

[jostenneil]

hi! Thank you so much for taking the time to recommend all those small town books and adding your thoughts and descriptions of them! It helps so much. I’m adding them to my list, I’m so excited! Also, if it’s no trouble, can you also recommend me dramas or tv shows with this narrative? I’ve been wanting a new show to watch :D

SOOO as i am sure you've seen over the course of the past few days,

hometown cha cha cha - a new gem that is absolutely fantastic to me. it's about a dentist who loses her job and takes a trip to a seaside city for some perspective, only to end up moving there and set up a dental clinic in semblance of a fresh start. the problem is that she's a city girl, and this isn't the city. there's a lot of preconceived notions that she has about the people in town, as do they about her, and so far the show has been a slow and steady practice in the kindness and patience we learn to emulate when meeting new people and understanding that they are as troubled and hopeful in their own lives as we are. also, the romance thus far is positively swoonworthy. i went into an emotional crisis last night over it

into the ring - another kdrama fave that i was positively obsessed with last year. it centers on the politics of a small town, and how a girl who is notorious for making (rightful) complaints to city hall ends up running as a district representative. initially this is only something she does bc she's in desperate need of money, but the mc has so much inherent love for her town that she ends up being a pretty proactive representative anyway. her relationship with one of the people who fields complaint calls at city hall is also a focus, and it's one of the most tenderly developed romances i've seen in a long time. there's just a lot of care and attention to detail in the show that makes your wholehearted investment worth it. every character brings something unique to the table

anne with an e - obviously if i was going to rec the book series then i was going to rec the show as well lol! if we are going to be completely technical then admittedly i do think the sullivan movies have the best portrayals of anne and gilbert as well as the best depiction of their romance (esp in the sense of accuracy, the third movie aside), but the more recent show i think does a better job of staying true to the books' nature of investing in a full cast. it really captures that homey, small town feel that i so love, and i think it expands on the cast in ways that other adaptations haven't really cared to

gilmore girls - admittedly i don't know that i need to include this bc i think everyone knows this is the go-to small town show. but nonetheless. there is a lot about the show that has aged poorly over the years (namely how enjoyable rory is as a character, which is. . . very little unfortunately as seasons go by) but i still think it possesses a lot of small town charm, esp in its comedy. the way everyone's lives just seamlessly interweave in stars hollow is both incredibly real but also ridiculously funny bc sometimes overlaps in episode plot points are so obscure as to be bizarre. i genuinely think it's a really enjoyable show up through the fourth season (the affair plot point aside)

sweet magnolias - this is a new show that started airing last year but oh my god! the level of invested i was as i watched it was so crazy. the plot touches on a lot of different characters but it centers itself in the friendship between three women who are each dealing with their own struggles and decide to open a spa together as a sort of healing project. the character arcs aren't particularly unique but everyone is nonetheless so endearing and i really appreciate how almost every character is human. like i think a lot of shows with teens can tend to make them out as unforgivable esp bc it's so common for adults to portray them these days, but the teens in this show are actually teens, and i like that they're given opportunities to grow and change in spite of mistakes they may make. i rly value those kind of narratives and overall the atmosphere of the show was just very healing. also heather headley is so damn pretty i was completely enamored with her the whole season

everwood - little to no one has heard of this show likely bc it started airing at around the same time as the oc and one tree hill and i mean. obv it was going to be overlooked in comparison. but personally i love it a lot! the initial plot's about this kid ephram who's just lost his mom and moves to colorado with his dad and sister. his dad worked a lot before his mom's death and as such ephram doesn't really have much of a relationship with him, so rebuilding that is a huge focus. there's also amy, aka the girl ephram likes, who's dealing with some trauma of her own bc her brother landed her boyfriend in a coma. there's a lot of baggage in this show re: death and i think there's a sadness that really permeates the atmosphere, but not in a way that's disconcerting per se. it's just real. it gets down to the ugliness and loneliness of trauma, esp wrt the teen characters, and i really appreciate that. the only major flaw is there's a plot point where ephram dates his college babysitter who is in college and gets her pregnant although his dad scares her off so he never finds out. but we ignore that

friday night lights - as someone who was in marching band and could still not for the life of me tell you what is what in football, this show is so damn good. it's about a rural texas town exclusively driven by its football team, except this year, the first game starts off with the star player being paralyzed from the waste down, putting a number of different people on the spot: the star player's girlfriend, his best friend, the new head coach, the runner-up qb who has never actually played a real game. i think anyone who watches the show ends up watching it for a specific character or dynamic but at the core it's just about the like. inherent goodness of people. like some of these people make mistakes due to pressure or grief but most of them are irrevocably human and that's what drives the show forward, as do the unlikely but endearing relationships formed between various people in the town. my personal favorite dynamic is between tim and lyla, who are in a bit of a unique place as the best friend and boyfriend of the injured star player

i hope you enjoy! let me know if you try any of them hehe

[caffiine]

A BRIEF PAUSE

From my regularly scheduled content. I’ve got some shit to say, y’all (forewarning for spicy language and spoilers)

I thought about making this post on my fandom subblog but this show and this relationship have been TOO important to me for the past 8 years to not give it its proper place in my life. strap in bc im not sure how long this mf is about to be.

When i started this DUMB show at age 19 tortured soul “empath” dark academia me thought sam winchester was going to be my favourite character. and don’t @ me, i love sam now in his own right (and we deserve some SAILEEN PEOPLE). but after literally less than 5 episodes i KNEW dean’s character and his arc were going to be amazing and beautiful and he immediately became my favourite brother. The nuances of his character i.e. his shell vs his true self were so evident to me even in the first couple seasons. in my humble opinion, he had the most growth of the two brothers.

They all deserve to be happy, but for whatever FUCKING reason dean has the HARDEST TIME OF ANYONE being happy in this show. I know it’s his character. I know it was written that way. But FFS.  I kept wondering when they were going to wrap up his emotional arc and stop torturing the poor dude.

then in season 4 they introduced castiel and 1) I thought the new concept of angels as assholes was super cool and 2) I hardcore SIMPED over misha collins (still do). I watched benignly as cas and dean began to form this relationship that seemed pretty special. I started watching the show when it was in its eighth season and I binged the shit out of it for two weeks until I was caught up. By the time I was caught up I was CERTAIN there were some feelings between them and I LOVED it. I am bisexual and I was ECSTATIC for a potential queer relationship between two masculine-portrayed dudes. I went on tumblr to express my newfound theory, only to find out that this was a real THING. “Destiel” was already an idea that had absolutely and intensely BLOSSOMED in the fandom  for several seasons already. So many others saw what I saw and saw the potential of emotionally tortured/constipated “daddy’s blunt instrument” dean and the unfeeling daddy’s boy cas “crack in his chassis” Winchester being allowed to be happy together. I felt validated and hopeful. For a while.

Then it was season after season of hopefulness for them to be finally happy with each other while still fighting the ills of their world with sam and the other new members of their family that were added along the way, only to constantly have that hope seemingly teased away at the end every single time. By season 11 and the introduction of amara (not bashing, eventually loved her character and her development too) I gave up. I lost hope. I stopped watching the show. I didn’t want to keep watching my two favourite characters continuously abused by the story they were thrown into.

I know not everyone likes destiel, not everyone thought it was real. That’s chill, idc. Stories are so often meant to be (and sometimes inadvertently) left up to interpretation by the person experiencing and consuming them. It’s what’s so amazing about books and shows and movies that are able to make us feel so intensely about them and their characters. And I felt SO strongly about dean and cas. It was honestly really upsetting to me, the way the show was going with their relationship.

A while later season 13 had been going on and I started seeing some things pop up on my dash. Hopeful things. I did a bit of research and accidentally saw THE SCENE from season 12 and I couldn’t help myself. I restarted it. I watched the whole thing from the beginning again AND introduced it to my boyfriend I think partially as a way to ensure I wasn’t imagining shit (it took him awhile and a lot of me internally screaming during many scenes but by season 9 he was like “uh are they in gay love”). Fast forward to me finally catching up as season 14 was starting. I was still hopeful, somehow. And it happened AGAIN. Season 14 and the beginnings of 15 made me so sad. I HATED what they did with their relationship. I HATED the way it ended. I HATED the way dean treated cas and everyone around him. It felt like the show was taking his whole character arc back to day 1. I didn’t understand. I kept watching for a couple episodes after the big argument and cas left but the luster was gone and eventually I just stopped.

I love this show. It has meant so much to me as a story. So many of the characters are/were very dear to me. I know it’s a running joke with this show about character deaths and homophobia but the strength of the bond I felt was between cas and dean gave me a lot of hope. But it wasn’t enough. I felt betrayed one too many times. And for those of you who kept watching, for whatever reason, I don’t hold it against you. It’s still a beautiful and interesting story without cas and dean’s relationship. But I just personally couldn’t do it anymore.

I hadn’t planned on watching the rest of season 15 when it came back after pandemic hiatus, at least not for awhile. So imagine my FUCKING surprise when I was doom scrolling through twitter during election week on Thursday and I see supernatural trending right along with election shit.

What.

I couldn’t stop myself, I looked and literally SCREAMED and made my boyfriend spill his wine all over our couch. I didn’t know exactly what happened as I hadn’t seen the episode but APPARENTLY all my emotions and feelings had been at least partially vindicated. So I BOUGHT season 15 so I could finish watching where I had left off. I watched 8 episodes in less than 24hrs (don’t judge me there’s a quarantine) and I LIKED them. And it might’ve been bc I knew what was about to happen in 15 x18 but I really felt like the show was getting STRONGER as it neared its finish.

I was so excited for 15x19. I read so many posts from fellow fans, destiel and antis alike. There really weren’t a lot of bad emotions running around. Everyone seemed hopeful and excited like me.

I probably don’t need to go over 15x19 emotions but im going to anyway. I was disappointed. I was confused. I was angry. we are in season 15. The last season ever for this show that has had a HUGE following of fans who have loved it, sometimes unconditionally, sometimes even though it wasn’t the best (and sometimes less than good). A season and show that had just announced YES. CAS LOVES DEAN. ITS REAL. And I shouldn’t have to go over the nuances of why we would expect more after this, with two episodes to go before the show is done forever.

But I will bc im mad af.

Like I said in the beginning. Dean’s character arc has been incredible. His emotional growth – as subtle as it might’ve seemed – has been amazing. And dean has always been an emotional, loving person. he just felt like he wasn’t because the world made him feel that way. And that’s sad, y’all. Dean deserves to realize he DESERVES happiness. And in 15x18, we were finally heading basically directly there. With destiel, yes, but even if you’re anti, what cas said to dean about who he is and why he loves him obviously struck a fucking chord with dean. It obviously changed the way he viewed himself (RE: “that’s not who I am, that’s not who we are”).

But for WHATEVER reason that’s ALL we got in 15x19. One fucking SENTENCE about dean realizing maybe he’s not just built to kill people. And then jack leaves without a single mention of Eileen or cas or Charlie or literally anyone they ever cared about and dean rode off into the sunset alone with his brother while we watched a fucking FIVE MINUTE MONTAGE that made me want to hurl my own body into the sun they were driving toward. And cas is STILL DEAD.

BUT THERE’S STILL ONE EPISODE LEFT AND FUCK ME IF I HAVENT BEEN PAINTING ON MY CLOWN MAKEUP ALL WEEK. SO WHAT DO I WANT????

ONE: DEAN DESERVES HAPPINESS. REAL HAPPINESS. What the FUCK supernatural??? Wasn’t this the whole point of his arc??? And don’t get me wrong I REALLY want that happiness to come from Cas and a real spoken relationship of some sort between them bc it also ties in with my second point but tbh just PLEASE let dean be happy. Dean is a loving person and does everything for love as we JUST FOUND OUT. Dean would NOT be happy with everyone he’s ever loved gone for the rest of his life. I just don’t believe that’s fucking true. h elp him pls.

TWO: CAS DESERVES HAPPINESS. I know we got this whole speech about “happiness isn’t in the having it’s simply in being”  but like. Really. Castiel was supposed to be a throwaway character no one was supposed to care about. But we all cared SO MUCH that he lasted 11 SEASONS longer than intended and became a main character and an integral part of the story. Cas has arguably sacrificed more than anyone on this show. His last act was to sacrifice his life to save the man he loved. He knew where he was going. He knew he was finally going to be able to tell dean he loved him and then immediately be taken by the empty where we know now thanks to season 15 that everyone in there just gets to dream forever about their regrets and sadness. HOW IS THAT FAIR. HOW IS THAT A GOOD ENDING FOR CAS. HOW DO YOU EXPECT ANYONE – CHARACTERS AND FANS ALIKE –TO BE HAPPY ABOUT THAT. Its messed up, supernatural. Y’all KNOW it is and I hope to HIGH HEAVENS this is going to be corrected in 15x20.

THREE: give sam Eileen back. 

Well that’s all I’ve got in me, folks. I’m absolutely and intensely dreading Thursday. Im scared and nervous and obviously still angry that this is absolutely going to be the opposite of what they promised – another “game of thrones” ending. Some of y’all are giving me hope with your posts about maybe they’re trying to keep the ending a surprise and maybe cas is coming back and how can they not and why else would they have done the second to last episode like that and I hope yall are right.

Either way, im glad I am not alone with my feelings. Thanks yall for the experience of this fandom and show. Let’s stick together on Thursday, no matter our differences.

 PS stop calling jensen ackles a homophobe or ill hex you. 

[szivtalan]

character ask: kagami, momoi, alex and himuro 👀👀👀

!!! omg thank u Ceru! u might be one of my favorite mutuals <33 (putting this under a read more just so I can speak at lengths about each individual character)

Why I like Kagami: this is where I sarcastically ask “why DON’T i like him” but that’s literally the next question so; he’s everything i want to be and more. He has the determination and the willpower to make his own dreams come true, he’s gay as shit, he’s tall and buff and well-adjusted, mature enough to live on his own at an annoyingly young age, he’s funny and dumb and a total himbo as well as an excellent advisor bc of how grounded he is.

Why I don’t: I’m... not really good with explosive people. Violent men with loud voices especially scare me, and I’d think I’d flinch around him a lot and that would make me rlly anxious.

Favorite episode: it’s a toss-up between the Seirin fam visiting his place for the first time (is it where Kuroko confesses his love to him and then passes out in his arms? idk), and the onsen episode. I also loved all his plays against Kise and Aomine. AND the training camp w him running a lot in the sand.

Favorite season/movie: season 2 probably because he’s not a jerk anymore, but he’s still on his way to shed off any asshole behavior stuck to him. And I actually liked Last Game?

Favorite line: “There’s no such thing as useless effort.” and “This is our drama and we write the plot.” because he’s so ridiculous.

Favorite outfit: all of his casual fits... comfy but manly is my Jam

OTP: AoKaga....they’re truly soulmates, star-crossed lovers, canonically brought together by fate.

Brotp/otp no. 2: KagaKuro, I love them

Head Canon: I have several collections because I think too much about this boy, but here’s something I think about his family: he doesn’t know what happened to his mom. He never asked, because it wasn’t relevant, and he didn’t want to inconvenience his dad by questioning him. Occasionally, as a kid he felt like he was missing out on something (seeing other kids with their moms, feeling like they’re being treated with much more gentle care because they have moms), but as he grew older he realized that nurturing behavior shouldn’t have been limited to only a mother, and that he was just straight up neglected without any regards to missing a parent in his life.

Unpopular opinion: I never realized this was an unpopular opinion but I’m glad he went back to America at the end of Last Game. Obviously, it’s sad that he had to separate from the others, but I felt like Japanese basketball has always been just a stepping point to him, and now that he’d beat the best of them, it was time to move on. And it also warms my heart that him getting scouted in the US gave Aomine hope to aim big, too. I felt like both of them would’ve felt trapped in Japan with their skill sets.

A wish: I want him to be happy and gay and to confront Himuro and tell him how hurt he was by how he treated him and probably do the same to his dad too

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: ....whatever I’d say Shinsun has probably written it/will write it, but I don’t want him to forget about the GoM just because he becomes a world-famous athlete.

5 words to best describe them: sweet child with anger issues

My nickname for them: not mine (it’s Sypha’s) but “Kags”, Kagami, Tigerboy, Kagababe, Baby

Why I like Momoi: she is SO nurturing and sweet and she cares so much about her boys!! I’m sorry it always turns into “how they remind me of myself” but actually I get feeling like a background character and being the moral/emotional/physical support of those who are more talented or in any way better than you. I feel a strange kind of kinship with her and also,,, feminine girls make my heart stop, and it doesn’t get more feminine than Momoi. Added: Aomine aside, the Touou team wouldn’t worth shit without her skills tbh, and she’s not in any way less than the GoM. Also, I appreciate her being the one person to try to keep their friend group together.

Why I don’t: Analytical People Scare me like!! how do u know stuff people are Unknowable!! I usually am also irked by her pointing out Riko’s breast size but I can just pretend that’s in a gay way (maybe Momoi likes girls with small boobs and she’s just bad at flirting) (also I don’t exactly liked her calling Aomine a “ganguro” but I have too little knowledge on the use of this word to say exactly why)

Favorite episode (scene if movie): uh the one where Aomine made her cry? It really came through how much love she actually has for her friends at that one.

Favorite season/movie: she was great in all of them!!

Favorite line: I can’t remember the exact quote and Google isn’t really helpful either but the one where she made Kuroko promise they’ll always play together or something? Or that they’re gonna beat Aomine?? idk?

Favorite outfit: I like all of them but mostly I just appreciate her wearing so many hoodies, she looks so cute in them

OTP / Brotp: it’s both AoMomo. I feel like the have the most special and strongest bond in the entire series.

Head Canon: She’s never been shown to do, but I feel like she wears Aomine’s clothes a Lot. Also, they definitely have sleepovers To This Day.

Unpopular opinion: Momoi is good at basketball and she loves playing!!! But try being successful in it when ur opponents are Giants and Way More Buff than you are

A wish: I wish people appreciated her more!! Both in fandom and in canon. She’s an amazing person and she has her own skills and strengths that are rarely explored or even mentioned anywhere.

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: her falling out with her boys ;-; I do not want that

5 words to best describe them: strawberry sweetheart to steal ur heart

My nickname for them: Satsuki :> I feel like it’s a little too much to call characters on their first names sometimes but hers is so cute I can’t

Why I like Alex: yet again another woman with an extensive skill set. I love her persistence and again I appreciate getting disillusioned and finding your way back to the thing you love. Also it’s just sweet that she did that by teaching (again, something I can relate to)

Why I don’t: the whole “kissing children” thing rubbed me the wrong way but again, just like Momoi’s obsession with comparing breast sizes, it’s just bad/sexist writing from Fujimaki probably

Favorite episode (scene if movie): adshg any and all where she expressed that Himuro and Kagami are equally important to her <33 that shit makes my heart burst

Favorite season/movie: she only appears towards the end of s2 and in s3 so... I guess s3?

Favorite line: its so Bad that u literally can’t find the iconic quotes of these iconic ladies anywhere but... her story on finding her passion again through teaching kids, and anytime she mentions her fondness of Kagami and Himuro.

Favorite outfit: her iconic olive green coat with the short red shorts... wtf was that I loved it.

OTP: she doesn’t really interact with people her age but I’ve heard she’s shipped with Masako Araki and I’ve seen some seriously good fanarts and like... Yes Good I’d Love To See It

Brotp: I feel like her and Himuro would be that sassy pair that Kagami tries and fails to contain and they get into all sorts of weird, absurd situations asdjs what I’m trying to say is Kagami has to bail them out of jail from time to time

Head Canon: fck me if I’m wrong but she’s the lesbian single mom of the two gay kids she reluctantly adopted from the streets

Unpopular opinion: it’s more like another headcanon, but she can dunk and she taught Kagami how to do it.

A wish: I’d love her to coach the Seirin fam more!! Pls let her be part of her children’s lives (she could also judge streetball games between the goms it would be fun)

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: anything about her being romantically involved with her pupils makes me.................no

5 words to best describe them: Beautiful Beach Blonde Basketball....goddess

My nickname for them: Alex!! sometimes An Icon

Why I like Himuro: em dash Asdgsdj I’m joking, I’m becoming more and more fond of the boy. Once I realized that he shouldn’t have been the “bigger person” in that situation and one year doesn’t really mean much when you’re that young and that hurt, I realized he’s actually a good and hard-working kid and I’m sorry for giving him so much shade. Also I really like his snark and sass, but that might not even be canon at this point tbh

Why I don’t: I’m still sort of irked by him beating down on Kagami because he was envious/mad, but I realized the aspect of that situation that Really got to me was how devoted Kagami still was to him after all that. That devotion was what felt toxic, nothing that Himuro actually did to him.

Favorite episode (scene if movie): the time they met up w Kagami just to exchange a dramatic socially distancing bro fist and a few encouraging words.... gays be Like That

Favorite season/movie: I really didn’t mind s3 Himuro

Favorite line: apparently he’s said some iconic stuff that I don’t remember (and my sources don’t seem really legit) but I’m gonna say “let’s see you become number 1, bro” because again, that’s just so ridiculous and endearing. On one hand he really went from loathing Kagami to rooting for him and wanting him to reach his full potential and on the other, honey ur  like 17 stop speaking like That

Favorite outfit: his knitted V-neck sweaters and the black coat with the white fur.... boy’s got all the fashion sense that’s missing from Kagami

OTP: can I say.....AoHimu asdfh I ship 3/4 of these characters with Aomine what does that say about me

Brotp: KagaHimu. They can be sweet, but I’ve only ever seen Jake write them really well

Head Canon: I’ve been entertaining the idea of....trans Himuro.....

Unpopular opinion: everyone thinks that Kagami is the violent kid and Himuro is the chill, sweet child who’s somehow wound up with this mess of a fiery tiger, but it’s actually Himuro who taught Kagami how to fight and Kagami learned quite a lot of aggression from him

A wish: I feel like Himuro should’ve gotten a separate episode to explore his thoughts, feelings and past. He had so much potential as a character Is2g

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: him quitting basketball would fucking destroy me. I’d be devastated for others too, but it would really pull on my heartstrings if he just dropped the only thing he’s been so passionate about.

5 words to best describe them: gender-non-conforming emo child

My nickname for them: Himu, Tatsuya, Tatsu

[butlerbarb]

Comfort (Leviathan x Reader)

i should start by saying sorry for just disappearing out of nowhere. i think i just had too much on my plate and burnt myself out. which then caused me to spiral into a depressive episode and lose all motivation to work on something. 

with that being said, i wanted to write something about how i've been feeling as a way to vent it. i also wanted it to be comfy and nice and i really just wanted leviathan to hug me and tell me everything is okay :) i hope you enjoy this very soft and self indulgent fic bc i love leviathan more than anything

also! i am working on requests, so expect those out within the next few days or so!

ily <3

It had been one of those days. Well, really it had been one of those weeks. Those days where you just didn’t want to leave your bed, more comfortable to hide away by yourself as to not bother anyone with how out of it you were feeling. Of course, Lucifer would probably have your head if he found out you were skipping classes, so you went about your days pretending you were fine.

Leviathan had invited you to his room after school, you hadn’t been able to focus on what he was telling you at breakfast – your mind too fuzzy from having just woken up combined with the fuzziness your off mood had brought on. But knowing the otaku demon, it was either anime or a new video game he bought. His enthusiasm and passion for his interests was something that never failed to bring a smile to your face, even when you were feeling down.

Your day at school, thankfully, passed by in a blur. Mammon made a point of bragging about his latest modeling job he scored as he walked you home, trying to convince you to go with him. Naturally, he pouted like a child when you turned him down, whining that you were missing the opportunity of a lifetime! Thankfully he gave up when you told him you just weren’t feeling it, but you would be happy to take him up on the offer another time. He dropped you off at home after that, telling you he’d bring you something on his way back.

You were barely in the door when Leviathan was charging at you from the common room, rushing you into kicking off your schools before he dragged you up to his room. You tried to argue that you still had your RAD uniform on and that he should at least give you a minute to change, but he was hearing none of it. He waited all day for you to get home, he wasn’t going to wait another minute! However, that excuse fell apart quickly when you gave him a set of puppy dog eyes, letting you hurry off to your room on a time limit.

You changed into more comfortable clothes quickly, using up only 3 minutes of the 5-minute limit he gave you. You were back in his room just as he had finished setting everything up. You took note of the snacks that he had set up in different bowls around his room. Wow, you thought, this must be really important. Leviathan usually never went all out like this unless it was mega important.

“What’s all this for, Levi? Seems like a lot for just a few episodes.” You commented, grabbing a handful of chips out of a bowl as you sat down on the edge of the bed. You cringed at how spicy it was, some of the flavors were intense in the Devildom. Leviathan’s eyes widened as he gave you an incredulous look.

“A few episodes!? No, no, no. We’re watching the entire series tonight.” The demon explained as he removed a disk from its packaging and slipped it inside his PC. “This series, 10 Things I’ve Always Wondered About the Demon King: Facts versus Fiction! has been teased for years! YEARS! And they finally released it all at once on DVD. People have been speculating about it for so long and AH! I CAN’T WAIT TO WATCH IT!”

You laughed at his energy, simply nodding as you reclined on his bed. He dove into bed next to you once the opening began playing, delight blooming on his face immediately. You let your head rest on Leviathan’s lower legs, expecting him to jump and practically kick you away, but to your surprise he didn’t even seem to notice. The show had barely started, and he was already lost in it.

It had been a few hours and you were only a few episodes deep. Levi had told you it had multiple seasons with at least 12 episodes each, so you really were going to be there for the night. It had been enjoyable at first, but after a while of mindlessly staring at the screen and reading subtitles, you slowly lost a majority of your interest. Leviathan still seemed fully absorbed, however. You breathed a sigh, stretching your arms above your head. You pulled your legs up onto the bed, crossing them underneath you, resting elbow on your knee, and your chin on the palm of your hand.

You let your eyes wander around the room, head filled with the same fuzziness as this morning. While you enjoyed the anime, and spending time with Leviathan, you knew it would have only been a matter of time before you were back to feeling the same way. You tried to act as normal as possible, not wanting to worry Levi or worse, distract him from the series he had been looking forward to.

You were surprised when the sound suddenly stopped, and you tore your gaze away from on of the anime figures your eyes had been locked on for longer than necessary. Glancing at the screen and then behind you to Leviathan, you raised and eyebrow at the worried look on his face.

“Are you okay?” The blue-haired demon asked, sitting up from his reclined positions to mimic your crossed legs.

“What do you mean? I’m fine.” You replied, giving him a smile, resting your hand on his knee. Leviathan’s eyes narrowed as he shook his head at you.

“You’re not fine! You seemed distracted this morning and it’s the same now. You know you can tell me if something is wrong.”

“Leviathan, I- “

“No excuses! I don’t… I don’t like seeing you upset like this…” He cut you off before you could say anything, mumbling the last part of his sentence as his cheeks flushed a dark red colour. You felt your eyes blow wide as the normally shy demon reached forward, grabbing your free hand as well as the one you had previously rested on his knee.

“Leviathan…” You frowned, watching tears prick the corners of his eyes. Wow, he was really upset about this, huh? You let out a sigh, deciding that if you were going to tell anyone, it might as well be the one who was about to cry out of worry.

“I don’t know, Levi. I’ve just been feeling… off. For the past week. I can’t really describe it. Just sad.” You admitted quietly, your eyes locking onto your joined hands. The silence was unnerving as Leviathan processed your words and suddenly you were extremely uncomfortable.

“Like… depressed?” You nodded in response to his question, eyes briefly flicking up to gauge his expression. He seemed indifferent yet stared at you intently. Your eyes widened as he let go of your hands and threw his arms around you, pulling you into a hug.

“Levi, what…”

“I just! I just want you to know that… You’re not alone and that I… I care about you…” He whispered, burying his face into your hair as he held you tightly. His sudden confession shocked you into silence, all you could do was wrap your own arms around his torso, trying your hardest not to cry. Although even your hardest attempt couldn’t change how overwhelmed you felt, and eventually you were bawling into his shirt, more than likely staining it with tears.

You sat there together for who knows how long, Leviathan happy to let you cry it all out until you felt better. You could have sworn you felt a tear or two hit the skin of your neck, and you fought back a laugh. Leviathan was such a sensitive demon, being brought to tears by the smallest things.

Eventually, your seemingly endless flow of tears came to a stop. You pulled away from him slightly, his arms still wrapped around you as you briefly used the sleeve of your shirt to dry any remaining tears. Levi slowly pulled away, hands resting on your shoulders as he shot you a concerned look. You laughed quietly, wiping at your nose as you sniffled. You smiled at him, nodding a little to let him know you were okay.

He went to pull back, hands slipping off of your shoulder when you stopped him. Placing both of your hands on his cheeks, watching in amusement as his cheeks gained a flushed colour once again. Pulling him closer by his cheeks, you pressed a small kiss to his forehead. You pulled back not a second later, beaming at him happily.

“Thank you, Leviathan.”

BONUS:

The door to Leviathan’s room burst open, scaring the life out of the both of you. Leviathan jumped back, pushing you away from him in surprise. You fell back onto the bed with a laugh, eye drifting over to the intruder.

“Oi! What’re you two doing? Why’re your eyes all red, human?” Mammon, being the ever loud and obnoxious demon that he was, yelled as he stepped into the room. His arms crossed over his chest as he gave Levi a displeased look.

“Are ya makin’ my human cry, Levi?” The older demon accused, pointing a finger at his younger brother. Leviathan rolled his eyes, completely ignoring the Avatar of Greed as he briefly adjusted his fringe.

“Aren’t you the one always making them cry, Mammon?” The Avatar of Envy answered, glaring at Mammon from underneath his now fixed fringe. Mammon gasped, throwing a hand over his chest in mock offence.

“How dare you! I only even make the human happy, ya know!”

“I don’t know about that, Mammon..” You teased lightly, snickering as his face contorted into genuine sadness as he frowned deeply. “I’m joking! Come here, we’re watching anime! We’ve still got tons of snacks!”

Mammon happily dove into the bed next to you, immediately trapping you next to him with one hand, while the other greedily dove into a snack bowl. Leviathan grumbled lowly, rolling his eyes again before shifting into a comfortable position on your opposite side.

You were glad you had such caring demons to help you out when you were at your lowest. You would never replace them for the world.

[trulymadlysydney]

Hi syd! Good morning I know you were sleeping when I sent this but oh my god holy shit I am so mad. Shannon honey what are you doing?? Literally every conversation they had after the challenge made it sound like she was done with him which she should’ve been but why? When she said in her recoupling speech I hope this person doesn’t disappoint me but honey he already did!! Multiple times as you said! Why is she giving him another chance? Dude when she said his name I screamed so loud like what? Shannon throw that man away!! He ain’t shit!! Moving on from that (kinda) do you think he’ll go for that new girl who said she wanted to go on a date with him (I don’t remember her name)? Imo since it’s so close to the fallout of this situation I don’t think he will bc he’s scared but that being said if it were further down the line like the new girls came in next week I think he’d entertain it bc he ain’t shit. Like come on!! Cash was so right he was going in on that kiss. He was touching her ass and shoving his tongue into her mouth and for what?? HE AINT SHIT I HATE HIM I’m sorry that this whole message is just me getting angry at josh but that’s all I can think about rn so maybe after I calm down we talk about the other stuff that happened!! Have a good day my queen- E

OKAY HIIIIII HELLO IM FINALLY CAUGHT UP (except apparently I cant watch last nights episode because its only on Paramount+ what the fuck is that)

OKAY. OKAY OKAY OKAY. OKAY.

First of all, Shannon and Josh are TOXIC. ABSOLUTELY TOXIC BOTH OF THEM. I will say though, she was absolutely right in what she said to Josh, and the fact that she picked him again after all of that made me so mad?! Like at least save Christian and be friends with him? I was so sad to see Christian go :( Like I get it but WAAAA HE WAS SO NICE AND FUNNY

Also Trina is still so weird to me like girl ???? Idk if you remember from season one when miss Caro bounced from guy to guy thinking each one was like IT for her .... but Trina is giving me very much those vibes and I'm not down for it.

I'M SO MAD I WANT TO WATCH LAST NIGHTS EPISODE LIKE WHAT THE FUCK? I follow that account AfterTheIsland thats run by Alex and Elizabeth from S1 and they posted that apparently Kyra and Will went to the hideaway? Wtf?! I WOULD LIKE TO SEE IT?!?!??!?!

[xianglingslesbian]

oh I'll give u a character alright: Izuki, Kiyoshi, Riko and Aomine <333 technically that's four, but what goes around comes around (I'll keep this circle of love goin forever buddy)

VICCCC ily my man <33 thank u!!! aight putting this under a cut bc it got long

Izuki

Why I like them: izuki’s just overall so amazing! he inspires me to give my best in the stuff i do, and although it sounds a bit silly i try to be a person that he’d be proud of. his puns are hilarious and well-thought-out (as a person who loves words and word jokes, i’m naturally drawn to him lol). they’re also a way to take the heat off the team, he’s so hardworking and never views obstacles as obstacles, rather as hills he must climb to find newer skies. he’s also rather clever and employs his brains to great effect when his body fails him! izuki embodies the meaning of ‘eagle’ in the truest sense - waiting to strike when the time is right and not failing when it is.

Why I don’t: *sweats* can’t really think of a reason i don’t like izuki, at all??? i guess he can overwork himself a lot and tends to keep his true emotions hidden which could lead to misunderstandings between friends (although this is totally headcanon territory lol)... i also didn’t like the ableist comment he passed on hayama (“i’m just glad you weren’t smarter than me”). but i think he can (and will!) grow from that kind of stuff, he is that kind of person so yeah no particular reason for me to dislike him at all

Favorite episode (scene if movie): how dare you make me pick s3 e8 izuki vs kasamatsu, hands down. i know its like cliche or whatever but that moment just told me so much about izuki as a character? he’s willing to do what it takes to win, he’s adaptable and dependable and he doesn’t let shit get him down ever. it’s gorgeous

Favorite season/movie: s3, he got some fantastic moments in there!! although i will say i loved the spotlighting he got in s1 in the seihō match

Favorite line: “Fear isn't a bad thing. There are some things that can only be done by cowards.” this is first of all such a nice thing to say. ‘fear is not bad’ is just... so fucking wise? keep in mind that this boy is 17, i’ve met 30 year olds who are less mature. secondly it feels like izu’s speaking from experience?? like he has a lot to be scared of, i’m sure. particularly of falling behind and being a burden to his teammates. but it’s that ‘cowardice’ that drives him to practice so so hard. that visceral terror of weighing on seirin is what pushes izuki beyond his limits - which is why here he can empathise with furi’s fear, and knows how best to employ it.

Favorite outfit: look i hate last game w/ a passion but that lil tie/shirt/hoodie thing he had going? that was literally so cute. izuki in general has a p great fashion sense but his last game outfit takes the cake <3

OTP: hyuuizu oh my god i could talk for years about them but since this post is gonna be very long i’ll refrain. just. they are perfect they are fucking perfect

Brotp: kiyoizu!! kiyoshi is izuki’s biggest enabler and i love that for him <3

Head Canon: izuki can be very very passive aggressive when he’s angry at someone/sad and gets cold and withdrawn. it’s not fun to experience but tbh if you upset him you probably deserve it

Unpopular opinion: izuki should’ve been naturally better in canon. it’s not fair to shaft him and give the ‘trier’ thing off to himuro. that being said i am p happy with who he is as a person

A wish: i want to know how izuki felt after middle school! izuki’s and riko’s backstory focuses so much on hyuuga its dumb >:( he also would’ve been demoralised but he didn’t quit bball and i would like to know his thought process!

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: i. uh. i guess izu quitting basketball. because i genuinely cannot see that happening. it brings him so much joy, he should never stop cold turkey. i can imagine old man izuki hobbling about a court giving little kids pointers and making them laugh T-T

5 words to best describe them: “big brain caffeine-powered clown baby” 

My nickname for them: babyzuki/izu/shunshun

Kiyoshi

Why I like them: lots of reasons! kiyoshi is an admirable person. he’s strong, yet friendly and gentle, and he loves his team above all else, which i just find beautiful. i find his manipulative side also pretty cool, bc it shows off how multifaceted he is.

Why I don’t: this is more of a fandom reason but i really dislike how kiyoshi is always said to have had the greatest impact in hyuuga’s story. he badgered and manipulated hyuuga, and while some may argue hyuuga needed that push, it only worked bc hyuuga had had time to think about shit. he’d also been given space by riko and izuki (two integral parts of his life whom the fandom looooves to sideline for uwu kiyo//hyuu). 

Favorite episode (scene if movie): yousen match (can’t pick the episodes)! i loved the backstory we got for kiyo vs mura and i loved how kiyoshi was willing to smile and play but also refused to lose. he truly stole the show despite kagami being the one to finally take down murasakibara, it was gorgeous <3

Favorite season/movie: s2 for sure. kiyoshi wasn’t allowed to shine much after yousen imo - all the focus was on hyuuga kagami and kuroko, and to a lesser extent izuki. not complaining, but yeah

Favorite line: “Let’s go have some fun.” i know it’s kinda cliche but i do love how kiyoshi’s always thinking about playing a good game and enjoying basketball. he wants to play because he loves it and as someone who loves a sport as much as kiyoshi loves b-ball, that love is so poignant and tender

Favorite outfit: practice clothes! kiyoshi looks great in pink <3

OTP: kiyohana. hateshipping amirite ;)

Brotp: kiyohyuu! i love them as friends so so much <3

Head Canon: kiyoshi is half-iranian on his mother’s side and is muslim. i won’t say too much because i am not muslim myself, i need to do more research into this but i’ve had this headcanon for quite a while now!

Unpopular opinion: he should be bullied more for the fact that his canon power is having yaoi hands

A wish: kiyo finds something he loves as much as b-ball. he can’t canonically play at this level again, so if he found another sport/competition/anything, it’d be amazing

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: he should never become demoralised. kiyoshi at heart is a dreamer, so let him dream, let him look towards tomorrow with a smile always

5 words to best describe them: “useless dreamy dumbass cheerleader clown”

My nickname for them: kiyoyo, bc my feelings about him have yo-yoed a lot lmao

Riko

Why I like them: im a lesbian, next. /j i love her because she’s so tenacious and driven. yet she’s also kind and gentle, and never loses her humanity. she cares, and she cares hard. she’s so fucking smart too like... coaching a hs basketball team at 17 against players of NBA calibre and making them win? i could never. seirin without riko is nothing.

Why I don’t: i dont like the constant slapstick of her beating up her boys. also, i dislike how the narrative forces her to act ‘feminine’ and then has the boys think of it as nothing. like first of all if someone like her offered me a kiss i would so take 100, and secondly... why is a girl’s worth so tied to her femininity? it’s awful

Favorite episode (scene if movie): her sending in furi vs kaijō, early in s3. it was an exceedingly smart move that could have only come from her knowing her players’ strengths and weaknesses intimately, and being a brilliant coach. just amazing <3

Favorite season/movie: all of them! riko has some amazing moments each season, so i can’t really pick

Favorite line: “Humans grow. Don't act like you understand when you don't even realize that!” here, riko knows and knows well that she is in her element. momoi might have the data, but riko understands adaptability and knows how to predict stuff. in that way, one can draw parallels between takao vs izuki and momoi vs riko: takao and momoi are recon experts, whereas riko and izuki are strategists. momoi uses raw data; riko manipulates the data to her advantage

Favorite outfit: idk if this is exactly an outfit but her glasses are so cute oh my gosh. (i’d kill to see her in a leather jacket tho)

OTP: rikomomo!!! i’m 100% sure that momoi’s fixation w/riko’s boobs is just... repressed lesbian sentiments. also sports girlfriends gimme

Brotp: hyuuizuriko. i hc that hyuuizu were tgt since elementary school and riko joined them in middle school so... childhood friends feels!

Head Canon: riko knows how to shoot a gun. her father owns one so it makes sense

Unpopular opinion: riko does not need to have bigger boobs in fanart. please stop sexualising a 17 year old girl

A wish: white suit riko please

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: her ever leaving behind sports in any way shape or form. it’s her thing. in the same vein, she should never have to change herself or become more traditionally feminine to be ‘appealing’

5 words to best describe them: perfect perfect perfect perfect perfect

My nickname for them: ai/riri

Aomine

Why I like them: aomine is just a pure, hurting young man that deserves help. he’s passionate, and his fire died down out of no fault of his own. that fire’s reignition through kagami is one of my favorite scenes <3

Why I don’t: he’s perverted as hell and i dislike that. it plays into the ‘brutish dark-skinned pervert’ stereotype which is yikes. also i thought we were done with pervs in anime

Favorite episode (scene if movie): s2 seirin v touou when kagami enters the zone!! aomine’s finally happy and it’s so amazing to watch <3

Favorite season/movie: s2, he finally got happiness and peace of mind

Favorite line: “You’re the best!” there’s just so much of pure joy in this line. he’s so so beside himself that he finally has someone he won’t destroy. kagami sees aomine the person, and that person is so happy, it’s beautiful

Favorite outfit: the leather jacket from the finale lmaooo he looked so cute

OTP: AOKAGA BABY i could write an essay tbh

Brotp: aomomo!! theyre such good friends and bi/lesbian solidarity too!

Head Canon: aomine cannot dance. he has stepped on kagami’s feet multiple times. he has also attempted to twerk when drunk. kuroko recorded the whole thing and uses it as blackmail in case the puppy eyes and “but aomine-kun you didn’t fist bump me back” don’t work

Unpopular opinion: more a fandom thing, but you all need to stop making aomine the aggressive/possessive top/‘seme’. it’s racist as fuck

A wish: aomine goes pro. it’ll be amazing for him, a huge challenge and kagami will be there too so its a win-win ;)

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: he quits again/b-ball loses its allure. aomine at heart is someone who needs passion to drive him so i just want that passion to always burn bright within him

5 words to best describe them: “bastard baby needs a hug”

My nickname for them: dai-chan, momoi rubbed off on me

[teaauwu]

interview tag! (get to know me bc you know you want to 😌)

thank you @shawolatiny for tagging me !!! 💗

tagging : nobody bc i am too scared to

name / nickname: teanna / tea

pronouns: she / her

star sign: cancer

height: 4'10 / 147 cm 🥲

time: 21:50/ 9:50pm

birthday: 14th july (2005)

nationality: mixed (thai and british)

favorite band/ groups: ateez, dreamcatcher, red velvet, oneus, the gazette, libravel, sid

favorite solo artist: ariana grande, eric nam, hyuna

song stuck in you head: daddy daddy do - by masayuki suzuki

last movie watched: crimson peak (tf it was so sad）

last show binged: your lie in april for the 12828th time/currently binging rupauls drag race but older seasons

when you created your blog: idk like a month ago :') i lost my old one but i never posted on my old one

last thing you googled: "la seine" to do with a song i love from a movie i love 🥺

other blogs: dont have any but heres my insta: @/teannacarey which i use 1827282x more :D

why i chose my url: username i use for every account also an inside joke. its my go-to despite how ive grown out of using "uwu"

how many people are you following: 139

average hours of sleep: yikes 4-7 hrs but i used to only get 3-4 hrs a day

lucky number: 14

instruments: used to play the piano a teensy bit when super young

what am i currently wearing: my pyjamas bc apparently im a lazy ass bitch :D

dream job: air hostess, forensic psychologist, teacher (teaching the english language in a foreign country preferably japan) or therapist (either one)

favorite food: gyoza and pancakes

dream trip: going back to japan or thailand as i miss both very much :( especially thailand as i used to go every year but corona had to butt in :/

favorite song: endroll by natsushiro takaaki, prayer x by king gnu (wayy before it blew up bc of banana fish 💔), desire by ateez and sososo many more

top three fictional universes you'd like to live in: black butler universe (my favourite anime) - set in the late 1800s in england which i love also demons so yk how could i not ! seraph of the end, id love to be a part of the moon demon company alongside shinoa 👉👈 and code geass !! man if i could have my own geass you all would be screwed 😼