#but i am alone

[cypressmoons]

neuvillette doesn’t care for spending money on niceties.

he cares even less about the holidays. he finds the blatant consumerism to be exhausting, the constant pressure to always give, give, and give more, as if he should pretend to care about every person he’s ever spoken to while they pretend to care about him, fake smiles and forced pleasantries like it would cost them a limb if they did anything else. it’s nothing but a façade held up by the sweet coaxing words of material culture.

but when he sees the warm yellow of the string lights reflected in your eyes like the dancing shimmer in a snow globe, he caves in.

his expression softens as he willingly lets you drag him around the christmas market. the air smelled of overpriced fried spiral potatoes from a nearby food stall, and the sky above your heads are lit with a million tiny little starry lights, pieced together by strings hooked on the walls to either side of you. and stretching as far as his eyes can see is the crowd, decked out in hats and mittens and for archons’ sake, reindeer antler headbands.

it would not have been his activity of choice for his sunday evening, but who was he to say no to you?

a surprised gasp escapes your lips as you tug excitedly on his sleeve, pointing at the store window that has every single possible ornament one can think of. your feet are leading the both of you there before he can even react, and the next thing he knows is the strong waft of warm air hitting his face when you pull open the door.

an oversized christmas tree sits in the middle of the store, the branches bending under the weight of hundreds of ornaments, ribbons, and glittery gift tags with people’s well wishes written on them. neuvillette barely takes his eyes off of you for one second and you’re gone, his arm suddenly feeling empty as you’re already far down the aisle, picking up and examining every ornament that catches your eye like a child being shown the entire world’s supply of candy.

he’s not one to like crowded and overheated places, but the lovestruck smile remains permanently etched on his lips as he squeezes through the crowd to find you. noticing him coming, you hold out your arms to show him the ornament you’re holding like a kid proudly showing off their drawing.

“look! it’s soooo cute!”

you spin the little plastic dog around to give him a better look. it’s a clever looking golden retriever with a red santa hat and a string of colourful christmas tree ornaments around his neck.

“it is very cute, love,” he admits, not missing the way your contagious smile seems to grow bigger. he wonders how people around you haven’t started smiling yet.

your eyes slightly widen when you flip the price tag around, quickly putting the ornament back into its place. “oh,” you exclaim softly, more so to yourself before launching into a self-reassuring affirmation, “i don’t need this i don’t need this i don’t need this-”

“y/n.”

neuvillette’s voice cuts off your muttering and you halt in an almost cartoonish way, blinking at him in question.

“you can get anything you want.”

“but it’s twenty dollars-”

“it’s on me.”

your mouth drops open in surprise, but only for a second before you quickly gather your composure.

“it’s so overpriced though, we already have so many ornaments at home-”

“love.” he cuts you off again, this time with a warm hand to your cheek so you could look at him, “you can have anything you want.”

you almost melt, and it’s definitely not from the store’s heater on full blast.

“really?” you eye the little dog again, tempted by such a cute thing but still hesitant. you never liked when other people spent money on you. the happiness from seeing the adorable little face is not worth the marked up price and the guilt that comes with having people buy things for you.

“anything you want,” neuvillette repeats. he probably will not rest until he sees you happy with the small golden retriever toy in your hands.

and so you do. he does not hesitate when the cashier tells him the total price or when he taps his card on the pinpad. even with the million lights on the tree and overhead, all he can see is the bright twinkle in your eyes and your grin as you thank him yet again for indulging you.

neuvillette doesn’t care for spending money on niceties, unless it is you on the receiving end. he would gladly give all the money he has without a second thought just to see your smile, so beautiful and so radiant that it puts the star on top of the tree to shame.

and that night, as you snuggle into him under the blankets, the little christmas tree in your home has a new friend.

© cypressmoons 2023, do not copy, steal, repost, or translate.

masterlist

[patchyourbrokenwings]

On days when everything feels too heavy to bear and you feel like drowning, please treat yourself with care and patience. I know it is hard, I know you are tired, but being harsh with yourself will only make you feel worse. We are moving towards better days 🤍

[marsabillions]

pixie-like pandora to me doesnt mean shes a crystal girl, it means shes a chaotic androgynous trickster fae that speaks in cryptic phrases and has questionable fashion

[ooccoo]

i feel so weird and gross i need to be around people but i don't wanna say anything i just want to sit together

[snittygoop]

I just want someone that’ll never get sick and tired of me. I isolate because people eventually get fed up with me and do better when I’m not around

[zillychu]

everyone sh. shutd up im cooking smthn

[drownmeincolor]

Captains Log

11:08 am

This is the calm before the storm.

I do not remember his name; it's not really important. He's bound to arrive any moment. The stupid bastard. But maybe not as stupid as me. For if I have to run I don't know if I'll make it far in my Crocs.

Every sound I hear on the road is a threat. It could be him.

I was scared the first two hours waking up. Strangely I'm closer to being at peace. I don't know why.

[morganbritton132]

One of the perks of living in Gotham is that occasionally you’ll walk past a Wayne having the most batshit insane conversation anybody has ever had.

Walk past Dick Grayson on the street and hear him say into his phone, “I don’t think he’s anti-vax, but Superman is definitely not vaccinated.”

Stand outside of the downtown WE building and see Tim Drake walk out with his tall friend only to pause and say, “Hold on, I just got the mental image of Lex Luthor pregnant. Thanks for that.”

A lucky few who ride the same subway line as the newest Wayne edition, overheard Duke tell Stephanie that living in Wayne Manor is, “Alright, but when I moved in Jason and Damian gave me a knife and said I had to kill Tim. Said it was tradition.”

“It kinda is. Did you do it?”

“No!” Duke says, to the relief of the overhearers. “Get this…he stabbed himself.”

“…yeah, I should’ve guessed that.”

The downside to living in Gotham is literally everything else.

[sophies-junkyard]

I’m in the South. I’ve got ears to the ground. Republicans are SWEATING at the prospect of Kamala being nominated. They’re not sure Trump can beat her.

Let’s prove them right.

[maryreadings]

i don't want to be alone.

[aurazoo]

no makeout monday for me...

[lunarw0rks]

john “big stretch” price

simon “make it fit” riley

soap “just the tip” mactavish

kyle “give me one more” garrick

[vriskarlmarx]

the thing about latinoamérica is that it's the most beautiful wonderful place on earth. there's a spinal cord of mountains running through, and at their feet you have everything from deserts to forests to jungles to glaciers. the lungs of the world are here, and so are the eyes into the sky. there are animals like axolotls and vicuñas and llamas and condors and jaguars. and the people are the most clever, the most resilient people in the world. you have cultures that are thousands of years old that have been resisting colonization for hundreds of years and in several cases successfully fighting back and even gaining territory. you have people who have lost their loved ones decades and decades ago who are still fighting for justice. you have a rich history of solidarity and struggle and you can sit with people in a circle passing a mate around and they will tell you of all the times they put everything on the line for a better world. there is an entire island that inspired revolutions around the world and that has been resisting a blockade for 60 years. there are communities building autonomous, revolutionary structures right now. and really it's not a surprise that there's so much grit and strength here because it would be inconceivable to be born and to live in this beautiful place without fighting for it.

[quiddie]

Just had a friend show me a conversation in a fan discord about Suvi as a Black American woman in the context of the fallout from the election. And honestly? Yeah. The blueprint is simple: Black women are expected to put their own priorities and emotions on hold to show up for everyone else's battles and hold endless space for everyone's feelings while simultaneously weathering attacks on our character (oh she's so angry/aggressive/violent/rude) and authority (she's a woke hire/affirmative action quota/nepobaby) without complaint. We're expected to save the day under nigh-impossible circumstance, and with fewer resources and support that is AT BEST, conditional.

So yeah, relistening to Suvi's speech in The Witness hurts now. Because that's exactly the feeling I'm wrestling with, and what I see mirrored in the Black women around me. We are exhausted and angry and sad. Those voter percentages are a betrayal of "we" that was promised by other marginalized groups when speaking of the interconnectedness of our liberation. And the unexamined expectation that we immediately rise from the depths of our despair to prepare for the next fight is a cruelty. Suvi isn't real, but if this helps lend empathy toward actual Black women in the world, then I'm glad.

[heartorbit]

happy halloween! 🎃🐈‍⬛👻🐇

[thisismyforeverdiary]

I don’t know what’s wrong with me. All I ever seen to do is make people close to me unhappy. I do the same missteps over and over and no matter what I can’t seem to stop doing it. It feels like I’ve been a curse all my life. Maybe I’m irreparably broken. Just made to drift without ambition. It’d be easier if I was different but I’m trapped being me