#but hot damn do I relate to just about everything else.

[grimaldiapologist]

blorbo from my histories - Joseph Grimaldi, 1778–1837

[rafecameronssl4t]

Frat president || Rafe Cameron x fem!reader

Summary: Unlike Rafe, you managed to balance your responsibilities as Sorority President with your personal life and relationships, something he just couldn’t seem to get right.

Warnings: angst!!!

Word count: 1,973

A/n: first time writing frat boy!rafe lmk if you wanna see more

MASTERLIST (frat boy!rafe x reader au masterlist)

divider by @h-aewo

The room was dimly lit, the golden glow from the bedside lamp casting soft shadows across the bed. You and Rafe lay tangled together under the sheets, the air thick with the heat of the moment. His hand slid across your bare skin, leaving a trail of warmth wherever he touched. His lips found yours again, hungry and urgent, as though he had been waiting for this all day—between the calls, the meetings, the endless chaos that came with being the frat president.

"Missed you," he muttered against your mouth, his breath hot and heavy, his body pressing into yours. You smiled into the kiss, knowing he meant it. Rafe was always busy, always handling something, but when he was with you, it was like the world faded away. His hands cupped your face, his thumb brushing your cheek tenderly, a stark contrast to the heat of the moment.

You arched your body against his, feeling that familiar warmth between you, the kind of intimacy that only you two shared. But just as things were getting more intense, the worst sound shattered the mood—the loud buzzing of his phone vibrating against the nightstand. Rafe paused, pulling away just enough to glance at the screen. His eyes flickered with annoyance but also duty, and you knew what was coming.

"Don't," you whispered, your voice soft but pleading, fingers on his jaw to keep him focused on you. "Just a second," Rafe muttered, "it’s the guys." You groaned and sat up, wrapping the sheet around your body. "Of course it is." Rafe pressed the phone to his ear, ignoring your frustration as he answered, his tone switching from soft and intimate to authoritative. "Yeah, what's up?" His voice was commanding, the kind of tone that always came out when he dealt with frat business.

You leaned back against the pillows, pulling the sheets over your chest, watching as he got up from the bed, pacing the room like he was in some kind of frat office rather than your bedroom. You watched Rafe’s broad back as he paced across the floor, the low murmur of his voice carrying on a conversation that had nothing to do with you. Every word, every command he gave over the phone to one of his frat brothers only added to the frustration bubbling inside you.

His hand ran through his messy hair as he listened to whoever was on the other end, barking orders and sounding like a leader—like the Rafe everyone else knew. But that wasn’t the Rafe you wanted right now. "Seriously?" Rafe’s voice cut through the air, frustration dripping from his words as he dealt with yet another frat-related crisis. "No, tell him if he doesn't fix it, I'm pulling him from the party this weekend."

You sighed, rolling your eyes as you tugged the blanket tighter around you. This wasn’t how the night was supposed to go. You knew he had responsibilities, but this was supposed to be your time. His phone calls could’ve waited, just this once. But no, everything else always seemed to come first—the frat boys, the parties, the constant drama. It was like you were sharing him with the entire fraternity.

"I said, handle it. No—no, Jacob. I was clear about what you needed to do. Get it fixed, or both of you are looking at probation." Rafe’s voice was cold, sharp as a blade. He paused for a second, then scoffed bitterly. "I don’t care if he was drunk. I don’t give a damn about excuses—just get it done." Rafe snapped into the phone, his voice hard and distant, like he wasn’t the same guy who had just whispered how much he missed you.

You had felt so close to him just minutes ago, tangled in the sheets, his hands on your skin, making you forget everything. You thought tonight would be different, that for once, you could have him all to yourself. The warmth of his touch and the closeness you’d shared felt like a cruel joke now, as you sat alone on the bed, waiting while he dealt with something that wasn’t you.

You stated at the ceiling as his voice grated on your nerves. The anger was bubbling up faster now, impossible to ignore. The thought of being second to his frat boys made your heart ache, but it was more than that. It was the growing realisation that maybe, you’d always be second. Always waiting for him to put you first.

After a few more minutes of listening to Rafe handle the situation, you had enough. "Rafe," you said, your voice sharp as you interrupted him mid-sentence. He glanced over at you, his expression apologetic but still distracted. "Hang on, babe." That set you off. "No, you hang on. You’ve been on that phone for ten minutes. This was supposed to be our time. Remember?" Rafe sighed, covering the phone's speaker with his hand as he turned toward you. "I know, I’m sorry. This is important."

"And I’m not?" you shot back, feeling the sting of his divided attention. Rafe blinked, clearly caught off guard by your words. "That’s not what I’m saying." "Sure feels like it," you muttered, turning away from him as you pulled the blanket over your shoulders. You felt the weight of your words settle between you both, a heavy tension replacing the heat from earlier.

Rafe exhaled loudly, covering the phone with his hand. "Babe, I’m handling it. Just give me a second." "That’s the problem, Rafe," you snapped, the anger flaring as you sat up, the blanket falling away from you. "It’s always 'just a second' with you. Always something more important than me. I thought this time would be different."

Rafe ran a hand through his hair, clearly irritated now. "It’s not like I want to deal with this shit right now, alright? But I’m the president. If I don’t fix these fucking problems, who will?" You shook your head, hurt and anger swirling in your chest. “I get it, Rafe. I know how much responsibility comes with being a president. Believe me, I have my own duties as sorority president. But I’ve learned to separate those responsibilities from my personal life, from us. Something you clearly can’t seem to get a grip on.”

Rafe’s face flushed with frustration. “You think I don’t care about us? You think I’m choosing the frat over you?” Rafe turned fully toward you now, his phone still in his hand but on mute, his voice was a strained mix of anger and desperation. "Of course I care about you. But this is my responsibility. You knew what you were getting into when we got together." "Did I?" you shot back, your voice shaking. "Because I don’t remember signing up to be treated like an afterthought every time someone screws up at a party!"

He rolled his eyes, frustration mounting. "Okay, now you're just overreacting." "Overreacting?" you repeated, the word hanging between you like an accusation. "No, Rafe. I’m tired. Tired of always competing with your frat, tired of feeling like I’m just here when it’s convenient for you. What kind of shitty relationship is this?" He looked at you, and for a second, something flickered in his eyes. Guilt, maybe.

But just as quickly, it was gone, replaced with the same stone-cold exterior he always put up when things got too real. "What the fuck do you want me to do then?" he asked, his voice strained. "I can’t just drop everything for you every time you feel insecure about this." His words hit you like a punch to the gut, and you felt the sting behind your eyes, but you refused to let him see you cry.

"Insecure?" you repeated, your voice barely above a whisper. "That’s what you think this is? That I’m just… insecure?" "That’s not what I meant," Rafe said quickly, but the damage was done. You stared at him, your heart aching in a way that felt all too familiar now. It was always the same with him. Every time you tried to open up, to let him know how much this was hurting you, he brushed it off, made it seem like you were the problem.

You stood from the bed, grabbing your clothes from the floor and quickly pulling them on. Rafe’s eyes widened in confusion as you started dressing. "What are you doing?" he asked, stepping closer. "I’m leaving," you replied coldly, buttoning up your shirt. "I'm not doing this tonight." Rafe stood by the bed, his expression torn between irritation and confusion as he watched you. “Are you seriously leaving because of one phone call?” he asked, his voice low and almost pleading.

“Of course not, Rafe,” you said, your voice trembling with everything you’d held back for so long. “I’m leaving because I can’t keep feeling like I don’t matter to you. Not anymore.” Rafe's jaw tightened as he crossed the room, his frustration bubbling to the surface. “You know how this is, you’re a sorority president. You of all people should know how much responsibility comes with it. You can’t just walk away every time something comes up."

You paused at the door, turning to face him, anger flashing in your eyes. “Yeah, I do know. I know exactly what it’s like to balance responsibilities, Rafe. But I also know how to separate my personal life from it, something you can't ever seem to learn." Rafe stared at you, his hands clenched at his sides as he tried to find the right words. “That’s not fair,” he muttered. “You’re acting like I’m choosing this over you.”

“Aren’t you?” you shot back, your voice cold. “Every time we’re together, it’s like you’re half here, half thinking about what the guys are doing, what crisis you have to fix next. I get it, you have responsibilities, but that shouldn’t mean I have to come second all the time." His mouth opened to respond, but nothing came out. He looked at you, the guilt flickering in his eyes, but still, no words that would make a difference.

The air between you both felt thick, heavy with all the things left unsaid for far too long. "Do you even realise how many times I’ve put everything on hold for you?" Your voice cracked, the hurt finally breaking through. “How many times I’ve chosen us over my responsibilities, over everything else? I’ve never made you feel like you were second, Rafe. Not once.”

“I’m trying,” he said, his voice quieter now, like he was pleading with you to understand. “You know I am.” “Trying isn’t enough anymore.” Your heart ached as you said it, but you knew it was true. “I shouldn’t have to fight this hard just to feel like I matter to you.” Rafe’s face hardened, the guilt shifting into frustration. “So what, you just give up? Because I can’t drop everything for you in a second?”

Your laugh was bitter as you shook your head. “No, Rafe. I’m not asking you to drop everything. I’m asking you to care enough to make me feel like I’m part of your life, not just something you fit in when it’s convenient. But I guess that’s too much for you.” You turned toward the door again, your hand on the knob. This was it—the breaking point.

The moment where everything you’d been holding onto finally slipped through your fingers. “Wait.” His voice was softer now, almost desperate. You paused, just for a moment, waiting to see if he’d finally say what you needed to hear. But all you heard was the faint buzz of his phone vibrating again on in his hand. And just like that, the hope faded. Without another word, you walked out the door, not looking back.

[yeahxsurexokay13]

bragger, lando norris

summary: fans constantly tease yn for always bringing lando up and being a bit of a simp for her boyfriend - which only gets worse after his first f1 win - so she writes a song about how if they were her they'd do the same.

warnings: none i think??? but let me know if i missed any. the song mentioned is 'bragger' by kelsea ballerini!! (((:

IN HONOUR OF LANDO'S VERY FIRST WIN !! 🥇

y/n.updates

Liked by fan22 and 1.340 others

y/n.updates Y/n's interview with WIRED where she answers the web's most searched questions about her is now out! Go give it a watch 😄

view all 208 comments

fan1 she looked painfully beautiful in this

fan2 how was lando in the answer for questions like 'does y/n speak spanish?' or 'is y/n a good singer?' lol

fan7 she said she didn't remember much from high school but knew some words lando had been taught by carlos sainz and that her boyfriend tells her she is... it kind of isn't that weird if u think about it haha

user1 The more I see of her, the more I like her

fan7 i spy with my little eye 1.6K people with no taste

fan3 interview was everything I hoped for and more! she's hilarious and relatable as always

fan4 new drinking game: take a shot every time she mentions lando

fan5 I've watched it like 5 times already lol

fan6 we need a tally for how many times Y/n drops 'Lando' in her interviews. can someone make that happen?

y/n.y/l

Liked by carlossainz55 and 1.890.321 others

y/n.y/l the vibe i bring to the function (ugly crying on facetime) !!! so incredibly happy for you @/landonorris. you did it 🧡🧡🧡

view all 3.501 comments

y/n.y/l also congrats @/oscarpiastri and everyone else at mclaren for an amazing race ((((:

oscarpiastri thank you Y/n! 🧡 ❤️ by author

landofan4 ok this is very cute and nice of her🥺🥺

fan1 ARE YOU STILL CRYING ? BECAUSE I AM DEFINITELY STILL CRYING

y/n.y/l started crying on lap 54 and haven't stopped since

fan2 new post from my fave lando norris fan account yay (also go lando!!!!!!)

user1 Well deserved 👏🏼👏🏼

landofan3 soy lago

y/n.y/l same

lnfour LFGGGG ❤️ by author

fan3 How many times do you think Y/n's going to mention Lando's win in the next week? Taking bets now

maxfewtrell It's the messy hair and smudged mascara for me

y/n.y/l knew i should've gone for the 'perfectly composed while crying' look instead 😔

landofan1 rip lando nowins: 2019-2024 ❤️ by author

landofan2 "you were scared? i wasn't. i was ok (laughs). thank you. i love you" lando 🥹🥹🥹

fan5 when did he say that? omg

landofan2 f1 posted a reel on their profile and you can hear him talking to her!

mclaren LANDO NORRIS IS A FORMULA 1 RACE WINNER 🏆

y/n.y/l I AM SO NOT CALM ABOUT THIS ??!!?

user2 i could've sworn i saw her at the race? why are they facetiming?

fan4 they could barely speak after the win tbh! this is probably a call in between interviews

user2 today's bottle smash hit different ❤️ by author

landonorris I've said this like a million times already today but I love you so much

y/n.y/l i love you i love you i love you i love you

y/n.y/l

Liked by pietra.pilao and 1.809.896 others

y/n.y/l if he was yours, you'd do the same without apologising... new single 'bragger' out now!!!! 💋💋

view all 3.890 comments

fan6 WHAT HAPPENED TO HWLLO ?? HOW ARE YIU ??

y/n.y/l 🫢🫢

fan1 "he's just too damn good not to mention" .....................i mean she is right we'll give that to her ❤️ by author

landofan1 USING THESE SPECIFIC PICS OF LANDO TO ANNOUNCE THE RELEASE OF A SINGLE ABOUT BRAGGING ABOUT HIM IS WILD !!!!

landofan5 that last video is doing things to me.........

landonorris i'm confused does anyone know who this is about?

y/n.y/l no idea 🤷🏽‍♀️ but let me know if you find out xx

landofan4 apparently about some guy named bob?? I'm not sure

fan8 HAHAHA I LOVE THEM

fan2 she really wanted to make sure she'd made her point clear with this dump omfg

fan3 her point: she has a hot bf and we don't

user1 Well played, Y/N. Well played. 🥸

fracisca.cgomes On repeat ❤️❤️

y/n.y/l lindaaaaaaa ❤️

landofan2 knowing all she's saying is about lando makes the song x1000 times better

fan7 so she saw the tweets... 😐

y/n.y/l i saw everything 👀 they were actually hard to miss hahaha

user2 "i understand why you would want him (i don't mind)" queen behaviour !!!!!! 👑👑

fan4 So this is how she gets back at us for all the teasing lol not complaining at all

landofan3 I can't believe this new song is actually inspired by the fans' teasing about Lando!!🤣

fan5 we joked, she delivered!!! bragger is actually a banger👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[theresattrpgforthat]

How To Find Cool Games: On Itch.io!

As I drift into a reduced posting schedule, I figured I’d give everyone a peek behind the screen for how I cultivate ttrpgs for recommendations! Some of these tips might even help you find your next favourite game.

This is a long read so let's put most of this beast under a read-more. Keep in mind that many of these strategies work best when you're checking itch.io a little bit every week, and when you're engaging with the platform as more than just a store page. There's a lot of features that you can choose to engage with if you want to find the game for you!

browsing physical game recent releases. This helps me see what’s new and happening, and it helps with a number of things. First of all, I get to see new games pretty much every time I browse recent releases. Secondly, I get a good sense of what’s currently popular in the design space. Thanks to my weekly browsing, I recognize Cy_Borg, Shadowdark and Mausritter as games whose content shows up rather regularly - if you see a lot of products attached to one game at once, that’s a good sign that there’s a related game jam going on (in this case, Shadowdark), or that a game is really resonating with its player base.

sorting games into collections. I personally organize by genre, system, player configuration and (in Games That Intrigue Me) games that I’m personally really hyped about. This works for me because of the nature of my work, but a few collections sorted according to level of interest or game style might work better for you.

Depending on the need, I might have a collection that works specifically for the request - Neon Lights & Cyber Nights is perfect for cyberpunk games, but I might also reference this folder for combat, inventory mechanics, resistance themes, or interesting tech rules. LUMEN is great for folks who want fast-paced games, folks who are looking for certain kinds of video games, or folks who want to feel powerful. If you follow other people on Itch, you'll probably also be able to see their collections, which is a great place to browse.

searching game tags. I don’t typically use the regular search feature, although recently the website did update the toggles to restrict your results to physical games, video games, etc. Instead what I usually do is type what I’m looking for into the url: so in this case, [deck-building]. I might use a couple different wordings, such as [deck-builder] and [deckbuilding] (no spaces). You’re not going to find everything that includes the thing you’re looking for, but you’ll definitely find places to start.

Game Jams! I find these either by looking at the “Jams” tab (although you'll have to wade through video games here) or by noticing that a number of games being published recently have the “for the _” jam in the description. Alternatively, I might be reading the page for a game and see the little “Submission” badge in interaction buttons. There’s game jams for specific systems, game jams for various themes, game jams with special restrictions, and game jams that are titled things like “finish your damn game jam.”

Bundles. I typically buy big-ass bundles and then sort through the games in my downtime. These games are sorted into collections for future reference, and if a game really pops out - into the Intrigue Me folder it goes! And the best part is that I already own it, so if I want to learn more, I can just download it and start reading.

following game designers that I like. This way I’ll get notifications if they release a new game, update an old game, rate someone else’s game, or sort games into their own collections. I also get to see what other folks in the space are excited about - on the day I was browsing, Plasmodics by Will Jobst was really hot.

If you follow me on Itch, you’ll get a notification every time I add a game to one of my non-private folders! Also - you can interact with designers on Itch by liking their updates, and even commenting on their posts, which is a great way to get involved in the design community - and also just make a designer’s day!

[corroded-hellfire]

Hi gorgeous a fic request idea it's my first time requesting so sorry if I'm doing it wrong! What about reader being insecure about herself and worrying she's not smart or hot enough for Eddie and it's just Eddie being confused bc how could she think that wen he's the town freak?? and then reassuring her and just lots of fluff

Ah, this is so relatable! I know I need Eddie to reassure me. Also, the only way to request wrong is by being rude and you most definitely were not 💕

Words: 1.2k

You’re not sure what caused the recent feeling of inadequacy, but you just can’t shake it. The last few weeks it feels like a storm has been rolling in bit by bit, always adding something new to the pile of things you already dislike about yourself. The little things that have always irked you in the back of your mind steadily keep making their way forward, pushing and shoving like there’s a clearance sale on your happiness and they want first dibs. 

It doesn’t matter that your grades are holding steady because you answered a question wrong in class today when the teacher called on you. You’re such an idiot. There’s a new pimple growing in like a second head near your lips. You’re so gross. The weather be damned, your hair is going to look a wreck rain or shine. You’re such a mess. The clothes the other girls wear are flattering and beautiful, making yours look like dirty dish rags in comparison. You’re such a loser. 

Despite trying your damnedest to hide how you’re feeling from the world, your boyfriend knows you too well for that. Eddie notices the way you lose focus, your attention drifting somewhere else—internally, he’s afraid. 

Your latest zone out is while the two of you are sitting on his couch, watching a movie. A part that you’ve laughed at a million times before comes on and Eddie can tell your brain hasn’t even registered what’s on screen. He keeps stealing glances at you from the corner of his eye, growing more concerned each time. Eventually, he can’t take it anymore. 

“Babe, what’s wrong?”

“Hmm?” You’re broken out of your stupor and meet Eddie’s gaze with glassy eyes.

“What’s going on?” he asks, concern etched deep into his brow.

“What do you mean?” You know your attempt at playing dumb won’t work either—on top of everything else, you’re a shit actress too. 

“You’ve seemed sad lately. Kind of…distant,” Eddie says, taking care to choose his words carefully. He doesn’t want you to feel as if he’s interrogating you but wants to convey his genuine worry and concern.  

Shame floods your body as you realize Eddie has noticed your change lately. Just another thing for you to feel bad about. You shift awkwardly, moving out from under Eddie’s arm, where you were nestled comfortably. 

“N-Nothing’s wrong.”

Eddie gives you a disbelieving look. You can’t blame him; that was some pretty shitty bluffing.

“Sweetheart,” he starts, “you think I don’t know you well enough to tell when something’s wrong? When you’re lying?”

“You do,” you admit, voice low and soft. 

It’s a mutual instinct, though, as you can read Eddie just as well. The sadness in his eyes cracks your heart in two, knowing you’re what’s causing it. 

“Talk to me,” Eddie says, taking one of your hands. He holds your hand in both of his and gently massages it. “What’s wrong?” 

“I don’t know,” you say with a shrug, trying to avoid his eyes. “I just feel…off lately.”

“How so?”

Embarrassment grows inside of you, blooming like a flower—or maybe a weed. It’s hard for you to bring yourself to tell Eddie the truth–it just makes you feel even more pathetic than you already are. There’s no use trying to keep it from him any longer, though. 

“Like I’m not…enough.”

“Enough? Enough of what?” Eddie’s brow furrows in confusion as he keeps rubbing his thumbs along the back of your hands. 

“Well, enough for you,” you admit as you feel your cheeks burn with the humiliation that the truth brings.

“Me?” Eddie’s eyebrows pinch together, and he shakes his head. “I don’t understand.”

You breathe out a defeated sigh that breaks Eddie’s heart and take your hand from his grasp. 

“I see all the other girls,” you say, anger creeping into your tone. Not anger at Eddie or at the other girls; anger at yourself for being so inferior. “They’re so pretty and smart and I can’t help but wonder why you want to be with me.”

Every word you say confuses and shocks Eddie even further.

“You…huh?” Eddie says, mind not able to comprehend what’s going on. In his mind, there is not a single dimension or alternate reality where you aren’t enough for him. It’s simply not possible. 

“I’m not hot enough for you,” you say with a sniffle and a shrug. “Or smart enough. Or nice enough, or funny enough—”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Eddie says, waving his hands in front of him. “You’re not serious, are you?”

The look on your face and the tears about to spill from your eyes when you look at him tell him that you are, though. Eddie can’t help but let out a breathy chuckle and shake his head.

Your brow furrows at his laughter and a tear escapes your eye and makes its way down your cheek. Panic flashes in Eddie’s eyes when he sees your reaction and he’s quick to remedy the situation. 

“Oh, no, no!” he says. His hands come up to cup your face and his thumb wipes away your rogue tear. “I don’t think it’s funny. Well, in a way I kind of do. You think you’re not enough for me? Sweetheart, you really have no idea how amazing you are, do you?” When your only reply is another sniffle, Eddie sighs. “I don’t understand how you could think that,” he says. “You do know you’re dating the town freak, right?”

“But you’re not,” you insist defiantly. 

“And you’re not all those mean things you think about yourself.” He lets his hands fall down to your lap and takes your smaller ones in his. “Babe, you’re so insanely hot I can’t even believe you noticed me.”

Eddie chuckles and squeezes your hands. “And aren’t you the one always helping me with homework? Don’t I always get better grades when you help me?”

Eddie sighs and leans forward to rest his forehead against yours. You’re both quiet for a few moments. Eddie lets his eyes slip closed for a second before looking at you once again.  

“I hate that you’ve been feeling so down about yourself. I wish you saw yourself like I do. You’d see that you’re the most beautiful, wonderful woman in the world. Who is smart, who is kind, who is funny, who is everything she tells herself she’s not.” He leans in and presses a soft, sweet kiss against your lips. “I love you. I love you more than anything else in the world,” he tells you.

“I love you, too,” you reply in a whisper, tear tracks staining your cheeks. 

“Now, look at me,” Eddie says. He sits up straight and looks you in the eye.

“I am,” you say in a small voice.

“Am I lying?”

You know him so well, know when he’s telling even the slightest fib. But there’s no sign of that in Eddie’s eyes nor on his face at all. 

“No,” you admit.

“Come here,” Eddie says with a sigh, opening his arms for you.

Immediately you fall into them and nuzzle your face against his shirt. It’s your safe place; everything is always better when your head is on Eddie’s chest.

“Promise you’ll tell me when you have these thoughts, yeah?” he asks and presses a kiss to the top of your head. “And I’ll remind you that they’re not true. That you’re my gorgeous, brilliant girl. Promise me?”

“I promise,” you say, tilting your head up to look him in the eye.

He kisses your lips a few times, punctuating the message of his words. 

“You're my favorite,” he whispers against your mouth as you part. 

“Favorite what?”

“Everything.”

[larcenywrites]

Now… how do you think Sabretooth will be as an S/O?

I worry about writing for him bc idk if I can capture him properly… but! We can try to dabble around with a few ideas!

Sabretooth x Reader

Warnings: some pretty mild NSFW | no pronouns given to reader | there might be some typos pls let me know if so!

🐈 Honestly who knows exactly how you even managed to become his plaything s/o in the first place….

🐈 Perhaps he even, uh, acquired you!

🐈 Even so, I think Victor will surprise you! Despite the claws and fangs and being muscularly massive, he can be pretty gentle 💛

🐈 Loving? in his own way, sure! But traditionally? Not really 😅

🐈 He probably doesn’t smile much, he probably doesn’t say very much half the time…

🐈 But hopefully you can do all of that for him instead 😉

🐈 Okay, he does smile, but it’s probably more soft and neutral 😇

🐈 And even when he is trying to keep his one more soft and quiet, it’s probably still pretty neutral and gruff

🐈 You probably aren’t ever going to know where he picked up that trinket or ring or whatever the hell else you may find around your bed (and probably don’t want to know), but you can rest assured knowing that he thought of you when he saw it :) yet probably won’t even acknowledge it next time you see him… but if it’s something wearable, he’ll still definitely spy it on you 😌

🐈 I wouldn’t necessarily say he’s a cuddler, but more of a space invader 😼 Sitting on the couch? He’s directly pressed next to you with his arm around you but he’s just there. Not saying anything, not doing anything… really just- go on about your business reading or whatever, he’s just fine where he is!

🐈 In bed, it’s probably a similar situation. Honestly I hope you’re a stomach sleeper because it’ll probably make it easier for both of you when he suddenly decides to come lay on top of you 😅 He’ll hardly even acknowledge it or do anything else! Arms not really wrapped around you or anything. He’s just- there!

🐈 Though, he obviously has his sweeter moments! Sometimes he’ll simply lay his head on your stomach or chest or lap 🥰

🐈 Don’t be afraid to pet his head and play with his hair. He likes it 😘

🐈 Tbh if you roll over to spoon him (aka trying to just wrap yourself over him because he’s likely still bigger than you), he’ll probably growl a little 😔

🐈 Not in a mean way! It’s a soft growl! He’s probably just a light sleeper and maybe it’s supposed to be more like that little acknowledging burr sound cats make when you pet while they’re dozing off!

🐈 And let’s be real, it’s hot even if it is a warning growl 😏

🐈 This isn’t to say he isn’t a cuddler to an extent under the right circumstances! But those circumstances are typically related to him just getting jealous and possessive 🙄

🐈 He can smell whoever’s been hanging around you, and can even smell if they were happy, sad, or horny! He’s usually pretty unhappy about it 😒 and vocal about it 😒 especially if it’s someone he knows and doesn’t like (which is damn near everyone it seems)

🐈 But hey, at least this means that you’ll actually get cuddles in bed tonight! Arms wrapped around you and everything 😃 he’s probably also halfway on top of you buuuuut what are you gonna do? Push him off?

🐈 Obviously the bed isn’t just for sleeping 😏 But when it comes to sex, I don’t think loving and extensive foreplay is usually at the forefront of his mind 😅 besides he… can’t really do much with those claws 😬🫡

🐈 I mean… he technically could… but only once 🤧☝️

🐈 And when he’s in the mood, he’s probably not typically doing the whole handsy stuff…

🐈 He’s probably just going to bite you. Like some kind of overstimulated cat. Right on the shoulder too 🤕

🐈 And he’ll be very smug about it! You’ll swear he only smiles when he’s being a prick in some way!

🐈 You better hope you won the genetic lottery and got some of those regenerative genes or the like because otherwise, you’re definitely just going to have bites all over you 😮‍💨 fangs and all! He’s not shy about where he bites! Thigh? Sexy. On your forearm for no fucking reason? Fun! Neck? Sexy 😏 on your ankle while your legs are on his shoulders??? Now you’re just being annoying 😤

🐈 You’re asleep at 3am in bed? Doesn’t matter. If him crawling onto the mattress doesn’t wake you up, him biting your shoulder definitely will 😒

🐈 His sex drive probably is really high? Like sure, once you get him going, he’s an animal, but he probably isn’t initiating anything every day. Cut him some slack, the guy’s over 200 years old!

🐈 But that probably just depends on his partner as well 🤔 Not necessarily because he’s adaptable, but Victor can smell everything remember? Read something that made you even slightly horny?? He knows and he’s probably on it 😏 So he probably just responds to his partner’s needs!

🐈 You know, bath time is probably pretty great! Sure less stinky is a plus 🤧 but he definitely loves to be bathed 😘 beside it’s probably less hassle for him anyway considering the claws…

🐈 Which also means he probably won’t really be able to bathe you back 😔 you have enough claw marks as it is 🤭

🐈 But lowkey he likes to be taken care of 🥰 he won’t admit it, and he’ll probably play it as more of a I’m high and mighty sort of thing (which is also true!)

🐈 He’s not usually tense. A beast like him never has a reason to! But… he probably does get anxious about like, what he does… all the enemies he’s made… and how it’ll affect you ☹️

🐈 probably avoids bringing up any of that stuff around you, even though there’s, like, no way you don’t know… you just don’t know any specifics.

🐈 Can’t decide if he feels better having you at his mansion or at your own place :( He’d say both are dangerous, but that’s not really it— he’s dangerous 😔

[howlsofbloodhounds]

What would you call the seven sins of Undertale AU fans? (Sin as in general thing most of them do that rubs you wrong.)

Uh..i don’t know? All I have are just pet peeves related to my favs ig.

1. Forcing ships where they don’t need to be and where no one wants them. There’s nothing in the video, art, music choice, tags, comments, nothing that indicates that the content is supposed to be a ship yet people leave comments about the ship and tag it with that.

This is massively with Killermare and its shippers. No one can make, write, draw, or talk about killer and nightmare even standing beside eachother without someone coming in and sexualizing or romanticizing it and making it in to a ship.

2. Making everything about ships. It pisses me of when people make the conflict between Color, Nightmare, and Killer into a love triangle or a ship war.

Not only because this does a massive fucking disservice to Color’s character, but it also fundamentally mis-fucking-understands the situation between them.

Nightmare kidnapped Killer. He holds him captive. He’s trafficking, using, and abusing Killer. He’s manipulating him. He’s isolating him from people and resources that could help him. He’s taking advantage of a traumatized, mentally ill man for his own benefit because he’s skilled, intelligent, powerful, and easy to take advantage of.

Killer is not a person to Nightmare. Killer is a tool, Killer is property that belongs to Nightmare. And given the way the Multiverse works and the fact he has already canonically replaced Killer multiple times (meaning he’s either killed or allowed Killer to be killed/die multiple times so that this being with high amounts of Determination just gives up completely, not counting all the times he simply killed a Killer because they could Reset and it was convenient for him) Killer is a resource to be exploited.

Color is helping someone who needs help, who asked him for help, because he’s a decent person and because he—unlike Nightmare—cares about Killer genuinely as a person and his basic fucking right to live and be free. Not because he’s in love with Killer, or because he’s jealous of and hates and demonizes Nightmare.

He does hate Nightmare. But not because Nightmare’s a romantic rival. But because Nightmare’s a kidnapping abusive trafficking Multiversal terrorist who knows what he’s doing and shows no signs of stopping or changing and Color has every damn right to despise Nightmare.

The conflict between Color and Nightmare and Killer is a fight for Killer’s sanity, his health, his identity, his grasp on reality, his very basic freedom and rights, his very life and right to exist. Not his love.

3. Sexualizing and romanticizing abuse, sadistic torture, conditions and abuse that can arguably fall under MC and OA in RAMCOA, and trafficking just because it’s a gay popular ship and nightmare is supposedly “hot.”

No, TikTok killermare shipper #35, a video depicting Nightmare horribly beating and terrorizing Killer while he trembles and shakes in pain and fear is not, in fact, “definitely sex” or “kink.”

Real people go through the same shit Killer does. Some of them survive, some of them are still alive, most aren’t. All of them are deeply traumatized and nearly all are permanently disabled and struggle to support themselves because of what people chose to do to them. A lot of them were children—infants, babies, toddlers— when it happened, born and raised in it or sold or kidnapped off the streets.

It’s not fucking cute. It’s not “uwu toxic killermare!!11!!”

4. The complete erasure of Color Sans and his relationship with Killer.

only ever acknowledging him or bringing him up to demonize him for some fucking reason, replace him with someone else Killer either doesn’t even know or care about, pretend like Killer would ever choose Nightmare over him without consequences and that somehow ever being a good thing for Killer, trying to painting him as only caring for Killer because he’s in love with him (that’s not the reason he’s trying to save killer ffs.)

And also people completely ignoring that Killer literally asked Color to save him.

Killer. Wants. To. Be. Saved. From. Nightmare.

We can stop pretending that Color is forcing himself on Killer and not taking no and his “I don’t want to be saved” for an answer now in all the little fanfics.

Even if Color did think Nightmare was brainwashing Killer in these fics or not, regardless of if it’s true or not, he wouldn’t fucking force Killer to leave against his will. That would only push Killer back into Nightmare’s arms and Color knows that.

And also. Only bringing him up to kill him in a way that was clearly just done to push Killer into Nightmare’s or someone else’s arms and serves no purpose in developing killer’s character or the plot.

5. The lack of anything done with Killer and Something New Chara’s relationship as if that wouldn’t effect Killer for the rest of his life and effect the way he views, builds, and approaches relationships of any kind and people and the world now in his present.

As if that wouldn’t affect his views of and relationship with Nightmare, either, that are not just going to be fixed just because Nightmare “saved him” in some fanon interpretations.

Like. KC is still in his head, he believes they live in inside him.

6. The inability to ever let Killer be independent or even separate from Nightmare ever and that being the reason why some people refuse to explore Killer and Color’s relationship or even Chara and Killer’s. Hate the framing that Nightmare is somehow the most important person in Killer’s life.

7. The lack of exploration with Papyrus. There’s been more of it, but Something New Papyrus is alive in timelines where Killer is with Nightmare. He doesn’t remember Killer, but he remembers Sans. Interesting ideas. And just in general the lack of exploration of Something New characters as a whole like Flowey and Chara. Don’t really consider it a “sin” just something I want to see more of.

Also wanna see more of the fact that Killer is aware of Players. He may even be aware of Creators, but he just calls them Players..

[tiredofthehumanlife]

Draco malfoy headcannons

flavor: fluffy and smutish but they're separated so you won't get jump scared

Also I'm returning to my roots with this stinky mf okay I have writers block

Sfw

Liked you in the hallway crush type of way yk like when there’s that one person in the halls that you're like “god damn, anyways where’s my next class”

Never even tried to speak to you was just like ” I'll gaze from afar”

The only problem is that he has major resting bitch face so you were sat there racking your brain over what you could’ve possibly done to this random daddy’s money kid (like this isn't set in a private school but LOOK OVER THERE)

Confessed by just standing in front of you and 👁👁 before handing you an outdated birthday card with a 100 dollar bill inside with a note inside that was basically just him like “PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLE-“

You did give him a shot and he did actually speak words to you

bitchest bitch ever yall bicker (lovingly of course) 24/7

“did you for real just copy off of me?” “Okay well at least I don’t have daddy issues” “You cannot be talking and you know it”

He gives stick bug vibes yk

does not comprehend normal human life you could be complaining about doing laundry and he is like “Just have one of the elves do it?” and you are like “😶right so-“

just assume you have the answer to everything bc like you’re his partner? tf?

“how far away is Saturn in kilometers?” “They don't measure distance with kilometers, Draco, you dumbass. It’s called lightyears.” ‘right so in lightyears then?” “How tf am I supposed to know?”

he’ll hear a crash and look to you like you know what’s going on and you’ll turn his head back

I'm not one to assume someone’s sexuality but it's very much bisexual for the both of you (he likes guys and you know it)

a hot guy will pass and you both turn to each other like {insert Bratz meme here}

has created mustard gas on accident

laughs at his own jokes unironically (he is the only one laughing)

will try to be relatable and it's just like “yk that moment when your Prada shoes get gourmet chocolate on them”

makes up new names for your stuffed animals bc he thinks all the ones you picked were “lame”

his beauty sleep comes above everything else

Once Theo woke him up (there was a fire they had to evacuate) and the next night you found him hovering a pillow over Theo’s face you tackled him to the ground

Only knows how to play dominoes no card games or anything only dominoes

Bought you guys matching sleep masks

And embroidered PJs

And bunny slippers

PDA hater

He’ll sit next to you at max when you're around lots of people when you're just around his friends he's down with hugs and hand-holding holding maybe a cheek kiss but that's it

Alone is a different story he's attached to you he's actively trying to crawl under your skin as we speak

Terrified of bugs he's standing on a chair and screaming the second he sees one

Pays you in kisses when you take the bug outside (after you wash your hands)

Prefers baths over showers

Hates dogs and growls at them more than they growl at him

Only likes cats in theory bc they leave hair on his clothes

He's a reptile man

has owned a bearded dragon and will own more

Cold mf you wanna look me in the eye and tell me he has good circulation

Presses his cold ass feet against you while you're on the brink of sleep so confused when you swing your hand back to smack him

“I'm just cuddling you?”

“Cuddle somebody else fucking ice cube bitch ass”

Every single night

He sleeps on his back with his hands on his stomach like he's going to get lowered into his casket it's embarrassing

Thinks he knows how to shake ass and then when he tries (and fails) he considers never speaking to anyone ever again

Has gotten flirted with while he was with you and he just stared at them blankly bc he couldn't tell if it was happening

And then he left the room entirely

Walks in on people butt ass naked bc he has not learned how to knock (only child syndrome)

Stares a lot

He has nothing better to do so he’ll just come join you in your dorm and 👁hi👁

You've learned to block him out so he’ll scare the shit out of you

Sure he doesn't know how to flirt but he has money so he makes up for it

If you look at anything longer than three seconds he's following behind you with his card and the other twelve bags you have

This does have you ending up with things you didn't want so your friends love your random gifts

One of them will walk into potions with a luxury purse and one of the other kids will be like “tf Did you get that?” and your friends are like “🫵” And you're like “I didn't want it” So some of the student body does hate your guts just a little

favorite food is plain white rice

Thinks that acrylic nails go under the skin yk like in those videos with the fake hands pushing the nails up the finger yeah he thinks that actually happens to people

Jaw on the floor when you explain to him that's not what happens

Nsfw kinda

Down to three-way and will NOT let you forget

“I met this cute girl at the-” “I'm down. 😐”

“Oh did you see Harry this morning he was-” “Do you think he'd hook up with us?😐” “Babe. We've talked about this” “just once please”

Has asked you to peg him

unless you have a dick then he's asking for one of those two-way things (you're on my blog you know what I'm talking about dude)

Sub SUCK MY DICK DUDE HES A SUB SHUT UP

Actively begging sobbing on his knees “Please baby Please being so good please”

Would be a swinger and he'd have a pineapple on his front porch

Sorry

Has dabbled in the lockerrooms

Will ask you if the boys can watch him hit and you said only if they see him at his lowest begging and pleading for you he is silent as of now (give him two weeks)

Type of bitch to be covered in hickeys and when someone is like “What happened? To your neck?” and he's like “Literally what are you talking about?” will gaslight them into thinking there's nothing on his neck

Prefers cuddling naked but hates not immediately being in the bath after sex so he has to battle himself in his head

Can't dirty talk he's like “You look so nice when you're not in clothes? Do you like my wee wee?” and you're sitting there “bitch your what?”

Have resulted in him not being allowed to talk

Quickies number one hater

Needs his time to get into pussybitchboy mode

Okay bye

[wanderingconstellations]

YUA 🥹 (i assume since i see the name in your tags)

i wanted to share that today was so achieving, i ffffuucking earned a free college scholarship cause i was being unknowingly observed by a dean of a school i wasn't in but only performing and assisting my mother (teacher as well) for a recital with only 2hrs of sleep, (i also read your top posts repeatedly earlier after sifting through stories 🤭)

fuck i just- perhaps want something related to my life long achievement that i never thought i would get, and how about a mean!scara?

a mean, dismissive, cold scaramouche that needs heavy decoding, and seconds before reader falters into sadness, almost leaving, scara mutters something that quickens her heartrate, grabbing her fingers with his instead of her wrist or hand, showing a certain side, and she was met with sudden comforting affectionate gestures, cheek kisses, trailing lower and closer to the corner of her lips, praising her affectionately and lovingly in that moment, before fucking each others mouths for a good while, mean!scara uncharacteristically praising reader genuinely with each gasp of her because- he understood her struggles, her hardwork, and he was just- drunk in an unspoken admiration towards her (cough ME🥹) AND- i dont know what else to put, but i also want to be bred roughly by him- fucking each other like it was the end of the world, and i want reader to cry in happiness and from his rough manhandling during their breeding session — because she just- she's just so genuinely drunken and intoxicated in love, happiness and lust

as if his cum was creating their own future as well

- hiraeth 🤭

MEAN SCARA MEAN SCARA MEAN SCARA

You were breaking down, tired and exhausted that you had tears in your eyes. You were so fucking tired, it was exhausting. You've worked so hard but come so far, you've been exhausting yourself just to get into that damn school, but you never got into it after..how many tries?!

During your crying session, someone comes in and sees you in a state that he's never seen before. Scaramouche kneeled down to where you were, and pulled you into an embrace, and resting your head on his chest.

You immediately broke down in more tears, probably because of him comforting you. You were extremely exhausted, and yet you don't know why Scaramouche was now comforting you. It was out of character for him to do so, but you weren't complaining.

He took your crying face in his hands, then kissing the tears away, peppering kisses all over your face until he got to your lips, placing a gentle peck on them.

"Stop crying you idiot, you've been working hard. It's hard but that's how it is. You've done a lot, and it's admirable. I can see that you've worked hard, to the point where you completely exhausted yourself. I think it's time for you to take a break and unwind.."

Meaning by unwinding, he meant by fucking you til tears are glistening from your eyes, thrusting his cock into your dripping hole while whispering and murmuring sweet praises into your ears, telling of how good you're taking him and how hard you're working. This wasnt your mean and arrogant Scara, this was a completely different person. He was being so sweet with you, peppering kisses all over your body, giving a gentle peck to your lips and worshipping your body as if you were his everything (which you are.)

He would wipe your tears, and kiss them away, the tip of his cock would always kiss your womb with every hard and deep thrust he make. You would claw at his back, whining and crying over how "it's too much" or how "it's too good."

Scaramouche would just snicker and just continue to pound into you like there was no tomorrow. Honestly, he finds your constant whining and crying adorable. He would often smash his lips against yours, silencing your whines and cries while he releases hot ropes of cum inside of you, painting your warm gummy walls white as you spasm around him.

"I wonder how would you look with a bump..pregnant with my child. You love that do you? Being all stuffed and full with my seeds..I bet you want to be knocked up, don't you?"

Tears were running down your cheeks, nodding frantically and desperately begging for him to fill you up with his cum. He immediately obliges, stuffing his cock inside of you once again, cum leaking out of your cunt as he thrusts into you mercilessly.

The thought of you being knocked up, pregnant with his child, made him harder. He loves when your gummy walls clench and spasm around him, he would occasionally rub your clit, making you squirt on his abdomen right on the spot. You don't even damn know how long you guys have been at this, but you don't care.

Scaramouche turned you over to your stomach, putting you on all fours. He soon grabbed your hips, pumping his cock right into you once again, giving hard and deep thrust that makes you quiver and tremble under him. Damn right you were gonna cum right on the spot again.

Who knows how long you guys been at this. You came so many times that you've lost count, you were reduced into a dumb cockdrunk bitch for Scara to stuff his cum in, and you didn't mind. He would always give the best after cares after anyway <33

[undertalecookingwithkindness]

A Very Merry Christmas from The Eclipse!

It's that time of the year again! A time of merriment, jolliness and generosity! A time of hot cocoa, candy canes and gingerbread! A time of KINDNESS! It's Christmas!!!!

The staff at The Eclipse is getting everything ready for a big celebration, as you can see! The Christmas cheer is really flowing, though someone should probably go help Luna untangle themself from the Christmas lights... Still, why don't we have a look under the tree and at the gifts... Oh! It looks like one of them has your name on it! I wonder what it is?

Surprise! It's an update on Undertale Cooking With Kindness!

(Hmm, you don't look very surprised, were you shaking the gift box to figure out what was in it?)

UPDATE

It feels like we've been pretty quiet since the Halloween Update, huh? And that's for a good reason. As many of you may be intimately familiar with, the first chunk of December tends to be a time not of holly jolly cheer, but of hellish torture. Yes, I'm of course talking about

EXAM SEASON!!!

Indeed, many of our team members, myself included, were focusing on exams and schoolwork all of December and much of November, so very little progress has been made. Still, that doesn't mean no progress was made. We've got a lot to how off for you all today, but first, we've got a new team member to introduce you to.

Welcome our new artist and spriter: LightMoonCream! They drew Sunny in the Christmas illustration! You may be familiar with them from their work on Nighfell, but they've decided to hop on board the wild ride that is bringing The Eclipse to life! In the spirit of Christmas, let's all give them a very merry welcome to the team!

Speaking of very merry welcomes... It appears there's someone else that needs some introducing, I'm sure you've noticed him in the illustration or in the previous post that teased him, but it's finally time to properly introduce you to...

Courier!

Courier will be helping out with deliveries in the Eclipse. After all, everyone in the underground deserves a taste of the food at the Eclipse no matter how close or far they may live. Mawzz understood the potential in incorporating a delivery service into the business, so he called up one of his debtors goons employees. Courier will be flying you all across the Underground to help you deliver orders put in by customers.

According to Mawzz, and to his uniform, he used to work for the Underground Postal Service, but was fired for unknown reasons. He doesn’t talk about why that happened, but his firing does create a very shady gap in his resume...

Courier is a very outwardly serious and brooding monster. He’s here for business, not to make friends. However… he does have quite a few things that break through that cold exterior. He’s a little embarrassed about it, but he just can’t resist the allure of a shiny coin or of some sweet treat. Give him what he wants, and he may just open up a little bit. Just a bit though. The mask of coolness may be a façade, and perhaps not exactly a convincing one, but it’s one he’s committed to, damn it!

I suppose we should take a small aside to introduce deliveries. Staying in one place in the underground is cozy and all, but don't you feel like you're missing out on some fun exploration? Well, in deliveries, you'll leave the Eclipse and head off to familiar areas of the Underground to try and give a loyal customer their food. Sounds simple, right? What could possibly go wrong!

Do keep in mind, though, deliveries aren't planned to be included in the first demo. Still, that doesn't mean we have nothing to show off related to them.

You know what time it is? Get your carolling books out, because it's time for the

MUSIC SECTION

One of the areas you'll be making an excursion into for deliveries is the quaint and quiet Snowdin Town. The town is even smaller than the one you know in Undertale, so the new remix is even simpler sounding to match. A homely snow-filled paradise where everyone knows each other and is merry... It's quite appropriate, don't you think? It really fits the vibe of the season.

It's cold out there alone... The wind cuts into you and won't let you forget how small you are, won't let you forget the pain of the path you chose for yourself. You had a choice between comfort and the cold, and now your only company is the chill of the flurry.

UPDATED TRACKS!

An updated version of the intro theme courtesy of Venn November (or is December?) It's not an immediately noticeable difference, but once you listen to the old version and the new version back to back, it's clear to see. Close your eyes and imagine the epic intro that could be attached to this song...

Ok, now open them again, we've got one more updated track to show off:

At last, Customer Approaching is finally out of the draft stage and is complete! I hope you enjoy this theme, cause as you work your daily shifts at The Eclipse, you'll become very familiar with this song. Hey, would you rather listen to this on loop for a couple of minutes or the same Christmas playlist on loop for weeks? You gotta give our real retail workers their flowers!

Ok, that's enough music talk for now, it's time to actually talk about the progress on the game!

GAME PROGRESS

As I said before, progress was stunted somewhat during the past few months, but that doesn't mean we haven't done anything. In fact... It is with great pride and joy that I announce that the cooking system is almost complete! Yes, the bones of the cooking system have been all mostly put in place and stress-tested. You can almost complete a full day of work at The Eclipse. We've implemented the timer, customer waves, the functional COOK button, and a handful of minigames. We're currently hard at work implementing the final piece of the foundation of our unique gameplay: Recipes and Reputation/Prestige! To talk more in depth about this, please welcome our resident back-end coding and implementation expert: Moist!

"The primary 'battle' system is underpinned by a custom-built module that tracks Sunny's progress as they prepare a meal for a customer of The Eclipse, keeps a repository of all the recipes sunny is capable of making stored nice and safe their head, and calculates how well they've done afterward. In the final release, You may be able to cook more complex recipes in later days. As it stands, early recipes will be less complex, but the handler seems fairly stable in its current state!"

— moist

There you have it, in the coming weeks we'll finish implementing this final piece, and at that point the cooking system will be complete! From there, it's just a matter of creating the encounters and waves, stress-testing and polishing, and voilá! We'll be able to show off entirely finalized days of cooking, and from there we'll be all set up to start proper work on the demo.

But what about beyond cooking? What's progress looking like on the overworld, cutscenes and etc.?

Well, we've got a lot of the maps from the demo, well, not done, but set up for integration as we move our focus into cutscene and scene creation. In fact, ignoring some unfinished cutscenes, the map for the game's intro area is complete! Hopefully with some elbow grease from me and the rest of the team in the coming months, those cutscenes will be completed, and the demo maps we're still missing will be set up.

In short, while we were slowed down for the past few months, it seems as if these next few months are going to be very productive for us. Everything seems to be coming up Sunny!

One final thing before we sign off... I'm sure everybody's clamouring for some sort of release date for the demo, but despite all the work we've done, we can't promise an exact date. All we know is that we're hoping to be able to release the first demo in late 2025, but we can't confidently assure you that that will happen. As always, though, if you think you can help that happen, do send me a DM on Discord (shadowofroserade) with an application to join the team.

However, we would still like to announce a planned release date for something else. If all goes according to plan the reveal trailer for Undertale Cooking with Kindness should come out in January*, so stay seated everybody! We've got an appetizer to die for coming up!

*while that is the current plan, it is quite possible that it will be delayed into February depending on future circumstances.

Until then...

Kind Regards,

The Eclipse.

[diagonal-queen]

omg what if i requested...

okay okay imagine: [character] taking a bath with you and its all cute but GOD DAMN WHY DO YOU HAVE SO MANY RUBBER DUCKS? like yalls are taking a bath and you just pull out the rubber ducks and dump them in the bath djfbdjdj YES SFW I WE DONT TOLERATE NSFW HERE

characters: ranpo, dazai, chuuya, poe, atsushi, [your favorites] SEPARATE! if you dont wanna do em all you can just do poe and ranpo lol also you can insert blue lock characters if you want to 👍

i want isagi so bad frfr ALSO HONKAI STAR RAIL CAELUS WHY ISNT ANYONE TALKING ABOUT HIM LIKE HELLO??? TRASH CAN BOYFRIEND??? HES SO HOT TOO? I WANT HIM TOO FRFR

i hope youre having a good day i am indeed alive!!

- nia

A NIA REQUESTTTTTTTTTTTT OMG YES

Rubber duckie, you're the one~

♡ pairing: Ranpo Edogawa, Dazai Osamu, Chuuya Nakahara, Edgar Allan Poe, Atsushi Nakajima, Mykola Hohol, Tecchou Suehiro x gn!Reader

♡ synopsis: You bring rubber ducks into the bath.

♡ cw: Swearing, nudity I guess??? It's not NSFW lmao but gotta cover my bases

note: HELLO NIA. I want you to know that I AM gonna be doing a BLLK version of this some time after I've finished this one. Also I don't know much about Honkai Star Rail but isn't Caelus basically like that game's equivalent of Aether from Genshin? I'm uncultured T-T These are just crack hcs lol uh yeah apologies for errors and I hope you enjoy x

Ranpo:

Bold of you to assume this mf didn't bring his own rubber ducks

The bathtub is overcome with your shared aquatic fowl. You two are having an absolute field day in there (and not like a regular field day, but like a Magic School Bus field day)

Maybe they have a war or something. Or maybe they establish a peace agreement and the two leaders of your different duck nations get married to form a union

You guys end up staying in the tub until the water is freezing

Honestly though, you probably benefitted from having a little while to both just indulge in childish behaviour without any judgement or consequences. And it was super fun so no regrets

After the first time you guys decide to start having shared baths every now and then when things get too stressful at work, so you could blow off steam in a harmless and fun way

But you two don't tell anybody. I mean Ranpo still brings rubber ducks to public bathhouses because he's just like that but nobody else ever finds out the true extent of your duck-related shenanigans

10/10 would recommend bubble bath rubber duck therapy w/ autistic manchild 👍

Dazai:

He didn't expect it, but he likes it!

Dazai probably never washes himself ever so he was already quite on board with the idea of having a bath with you (he gets to see you nakey and have clean hair for once? Like what a win)

Also I reckon he's the kinda guy who really enjoys bubble baths and plays with them and gets the bathroom all messy with the bubbles (me too Dazai)

So he was pretty hyped for this. But then you dump like fifty rubber ducks into the bath and NOW IT'S TIME TO GET FUNKY

Dazai has definitely never played with them before. He's amused with the way they float, with the fact that they make noise when you squeeze them, their big stupid eyes and everything about them

He initially wants to question why you have so many of them or where you got them from but then he just as quickly decides that he doesn't really wanna know the answer

Is he as invested in the ducks as you are? No, but he's very curious about them and finds it nice that you enjoy them so much

Probably wraps one in bandages and gives it to you so you're always thinking of him or smth 💀 (it's cute though)

Chuuya:

If Chuuya has run you a bath he probably intended for it to be romantic and relaxing

And then you bringed in the duckies

After a quick discussion you two do compromise on a romantic bath. With rubber ducks. And it honestly ends up being more perfect than either of you expected

He'd have been willing to just let you do your thing though because he just wants you to be happy but mans works too hard to pass up an opportunity to relax in the bath with you

So what ends up happening is you two just cuddle in the bath and talk about life and romance and stuff, and there's also ducks floating there, entirely out of place

Like Chuuya would have pulled out all the stops. Candles and wine and stuff, so like a pretty mature scene that does not accommodate for rubber ducks, and yet there they are

But he thinks it's really cute how into the ducks you are so he lets you keep them around

He would definitely buy you more rubber ducks in the future just to see you smile. Chuuya is down so bad for you 😌

Poe:

He's probably never even seen a rubber duck in his 1800s gothic anxietycore life

You might honestly have to explain what they are. He's like 'and they don't do anything? You just have them there for company?' and you're like 'yeah!' and he's just like

Poe would find one singular duck of yours and latch onto it. That one is his duck now and he would keep it nearby because it reminds him of you

Overall though he doesn't really get on board with it. Like after the first two minutes when the novelty fades he's like '...can we please remove them' lol

If you say yes then the bath then continues on exactly as expected. It's nice but Poe's a little insecure and shy (cuddle him pls)

If you say no then he's just gonna learn to deal with them. This man doesn't have the balls to set boundaries with you (ME TOO POE)

That being said, if Karl likes the ducks? ...oh boy he's straight up going to purchase an avalanche of them

It's really up to you whether or not the ducks catch on or not, Poe's just along for the ride whether or not he wants to be

Atsushi:

Help him

They didn't have rubber ducks in the orphanage, and Atsushi probably hasn't had a proper nice long bath in years. He did not want nor expect a horde of rubber ducks

But Atsushi loves you so much that he's willing to look past it. And the duckies actually grow on him by the time you guys get out the bath

He's always seen bathing as just that. A way to clean. But you're determined to introduce him to the wonders of bathtime and make up for the childhood he wasn't allowed to have

He mostly just goes along with you and doesn't really match your energy, but he absolutely loves seeing you so excited about the ducks

He would definitely like the idea of baths being a cute couply thing for you guys to do though so whether or not you got your ducks with you is honestly irrelevant

But you do. And so he accepts them as a part of being with you. In sickness and health or whatever idk nobody loves me lmao

Just make sure that you give Atsushi as much attention as you give to the ducks okay?

Mykola:

Mykola has literally never been happier in his entire life

This was the moment when he realised that you were the one for him. His soulmate, his one and only

He doesn't care how many ducks there are, he just cares that there's ducks. And that you're the one who bought them into the bathtub.

The pair of you wreak havoc on the bathroom. Like with Ranpo, y'all were just being a little playful. You and Mykola straight up destroy the whole room

You two spend hours in there coming up with names, extended backstories and lore of each rubber duck and it gets so complicated so fast

He would also give each one of them a different voice while you guys are messing around. Theatre kid moment

You've now given him the idea to just randomly present you with rubber ducks at any time, regardless of the scenario. Your collection grows tenfold due to this bastard and Fyodor is not pleased about it. Not when Mykola is interrupting DOA meetings with fucking ducks

The poor repair guys you hire to fix the bathroom...they're so confused T-T

Tecchou:

Straight up just does not react. This shit is a regular Tuesday for him

LET'S NOT PRETEND THAT HE DOESN'T OWN RUBBER DUCKS BECAUSE HE LITERALLY DOES I SAID SO

And he just lets them float there in the bath and pays no mind to them. Doesn't play with them, talk to them or whatever. It's just nice to have some silent, non-judgemental company sometimes

Tecchou doesn't strike me as someone who would suggest that you two take a bath together, so it was most likely your idea. He went along with it because relaxing in a steamy room with you sounded nice, but in reality you just wanted to show him the ducks

And though he might have seemed disinterested he was so happy to know that you and him had a similar interest

You two are so good for each other that way <3 (good = autistic I guess, because Tecchou is canon autism I decided)

So while you play with the ducks or whatever he just sits there content and watches you do so with a little smile. Probably calls you cute at some point entirely catching you offguard

You two make it a regular thing, but Jouno probably finds out somehow and it's just a whole other can of worms I won't go into rn

Taglist~ ♡ @gettinshiggywithit, @fedyushka, @flower-of-darkness, @bejeweledgirl

[stararch4ngelqueen]

Hi!!! Huge fan and I hope you had a good day in your part of the world💗💗💗

I was just reading ur period comfort fic with jay and was absolutely inspired with this idea for an (unequivocally self-indulgent) new fic:

what if reader has intense pain on their period (like can’t stand, can barely move, everything hurts/aches etc.) and goes nonverbal when the pain gets too much BUTT reader and jay had an argument before he went on patrol and so reader feels like they can’t call him because he’s still mad at them so reader just sticks it out miserably by themselves. only until jay asks oracle to check on your vitals (because he’s a cute little worry wart and still cares a lot🥰) and sees that you’re heart rate and breath rates are wildly irregular and he rushes home (fuck batman he can finish the job himself HIS BABY IS #1) and sees you bundled up in the covers curled in a ball crying. comfort, apologies, and making up and caretaking ensues!!!

i’m so sorry if this makes no sense or it isn’t something you’re comfortable with (your comfort is #1 bestie)!!!! Also, feel free to modify in any way!!!

SENDING KISSES AND LOVE💅🏾❤️

It makes good sense!! I have no problem writing this ✨

I hope yours is going good as well! It’s a very under weather day for me, so I apologize if this isn’t what you were expecting! ❤️

—

Time written - 1:27 a.m

Tags: Period. Slightly broody Jason. Special guest star menstruation crustacean.

Part 1 in reference

—

Being miserable chased you around like a damn disease today, doing lots of more harm than good.

The kind of pain that left you breathless. An agony so severe you find yourself apologizing to any God that listened, mentally screaming at your body to give you a damn break. It was a miracle how you managed to make it from the kitchen towards your bed, forgetting to get your charging phone from the couch.

Sure, you had your watch. Yes, you had a device nestled in your end table drawer used for emergency calls. Wayne-Tech, Batman related stuff.

You didn’t use it. Either you didn’t have the strength, or too hot-headed, you didn’t reach for a button.

You believed it wasn’t going to be as bad. The cramps you’d get about a week prior before you start weren’t as painful this time. This morning had such high hopes, such high promises for a good day.

It was too early to think too highly about it.

Your body believed it would be funny to fool you, forcing you into this pathetic, crippling state shortly around ten. Rarely would you start at night.

You would’ve thought the blame belonged to someone else, anyone else other than what you experienced now. It felt like your insides were being torn apart by devilish hands, nearly making you ponder the urge to scratch against your own abdomen.

The room was normally cool, but your body was terribly hot. A peculiar shiver brushing down your spine, your susceptible body curled up in a pitiful ball along the mattress.

The house was quiet and empty, save for your choked gasps as you son through this horrible pain. You craved comfort, more comfort than any warm blanket could provide.

The biggest comfort you quietly desired more than ever wasn’t here. It was a miracle that the front door still clung to it’s screwed up hinges after being recklessly slammed shut.

You two argued over cereal, over which take out to get from what restaurant, over celebrity crushes. His side eyes were as dangerous as his criminal bloodlust, but they were always done out of amusing intent.

This time was different. You couldn’t remember when it started, recalling when it ended was now a painfully dulled blur in the back of your head. The argument was nearly verbally severe, with enough yelling to rouse the worry of your neighbors. If they even cared.

No one really does in Gotham these days.

You lay in your pitiful slump in bed for what felt like hours. In your distress, you weren’t aware of your charging phone going off in the living room. Your screen bombarded with texts and still ringing phone calls.

One of Jason’s few reliefs he had was through a distasteful crook on patrols, as violence was a great distraction. On such a slow start, Red Hood was left stalking with his own thoughts, dealing with his temper all alone in the night’s silence.

Just because he was stubborn now, doesn’t mean that he didn’t have his moments of clarity once he caught a break. He sent you a reluctant, one worded sent text at first before rushing on. He couldn’t help but shake off this suspenseful feeling though, like a tense dissatisfaction on his tongue. Was it guilt? Was it shame?

Did he feel sorry for what he basically caused? Did he at least wanna attempt to own up to it?

After ten minutes, he sent another text. Again, he sends another after seven minutes, then another around three. You weren’t answering them at all, which was a little surprising. You believed you held a distasteful quirk about answering texts too fast, which was what Jason adored about you, responding to him in under five minutes. Or ten at most if you were busy.

It always let him know you were never bored of him.

This only made that suspenseful ball in his gut grow a little heavier, so he started to call.

After about three calls, still you didn’t answer. Now that hall grew hotter and hotter.

It makes the most obvious sense that you were still angry at him, but the least you could’ve done was pick up the phone and cussed him out before abruptly hanging up. Or at the very least send his calls to voicemail after a ring or two, but that wasn’t the case,

The longer he stared at his rumbling phone screen, the worse his anxiety began to grow. Soon enough, he couldn’t take it anymore.

The Bats had an auspicious way of knowing if him or anyone else didn’t keep up their patrol routine. Jason put off this thought many times, giving less of a fuck now as he rushed home.

“Where the hell is your phone??” Came his booming question once he enters the bedroom, noticeably breathing a bit heavy from his rushed pace.

Upon your failure to answer in your trembling state, cowering under your blankets, you hear his heavy boots quickly approach the side of the bed. Opening your teary eyes, you see two milky mask sockets staring you down, still clutching his own phone in hand.

Jason would’ve questioned you over how many times he’s had to call, over how many texts he sent. He could’ve, but he didn’t.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” His voice changed from roughly arrogant to gentle softness while pulling off his mask, relieving you of that annoying heavy breathing behind the barrier.

Because everything fucking hurts, asshole.

If you were still angry at him, it would’ve been a shouting match all over again. No, all that’s left now is physical and mental pain.

Without another word, he rummages through both your drawers looking for something. Cursing when he couldn’t find it, he turns towards the closet, reaching up ahead on the top shelves until he found what he was looking for.

He leaves the room, making your sensitive mind wonder if he had the gall to up and leave again. Especially knowing the debilitating state you were in.

Beep. Beep. Beep. The faint chime of the microwave echoed from the kitchen.

You wondered wrong.

Jason returns, pulling the blanket back just enough to expose your torso. Pulling up your shirt just enough, he proceeds to apply a warm, heavenly weighted plush stuffy along your tummy.

A chorus of euphoria washes of your tense body, your unknowingly clenched jaw finally relaxing. You whimper out in temporary relief at this beautiful sensation, the application of warmth promising a slow, eventual comfort that would easy your agonizing pain.

“When did you start?” He asks, but you don’t answer. More like you can’t, really.

“Can’t talk, huh?” His forehead slowly settles along your temple, exhaling through his nose. Pure blooded guilt mixed with cold hard sympathy in his system, making his heart beat heavily as he fully considers your pain.

“God, don’t pull an idiot move babe,” he murmurs against your cheek, his forehead settling along your head.

“That’s my job. You were right about that.”

You were stubborn, but not that hurtful towards the man you love. Unless he did something where it was really necessary.

Jason remained by your side until you were comfortable enough to sit up, never minding having to warm up the heating pad one more time. He doesn’t say much after his last words as he brings you a calorie rich snack and some pain medication, sitting idly by while opening a water bottle for you.

He gets you to a hot shower after the painkillers slowly prove they’re kicking in.

Fresh clothes were piled on the bathroom counter for you after the seething hot shower, consisting of one of his shirts and a pair of your old shorts you didn’t care much for.

Dinner, or an incredibly early breakfast, was one of your favorite cup noodles. Quick, hot and easy, so you could take a strong sleep medication and rest this horrible night away.

Jason by now was unbearably silent, too silent. Occasionally, he asked if you were okay or if the cup was too hot to hold while you slurped your noodles. Red Hood became a quiet, doting dog, keeping behind you as you shuffle to bed, still dressed in his gear.

It was only after you were settled back into bed in your much better state did Jason decide to finally relax, comfortable enough to take off his gear.

You were left watching as he turned around, pulling off his taunt, black shirt he wore under all that armor nearly every night. A faint hiss pushes through his nose as the fabric tugs on his freshly bandaged gash, just shy from his right shoulder blade.

“I didn’t mean it,” you exhale, tears dribbling over the bridge of your nose. “You’re not stupid, Jason. I didn’t mean it.”

He still keeps quiet, his head slightly turning as he acknowledges the pain you were still in. He doesn’t blame you for your anger, it just makes him feel more stupid for being mad at you.

He kept getting hurt, and you always took care of him. Sometimes, he kept getting hurt too much. You couldn’t help getting more and more worried for his safety while he chooses to shrug off the pain.

Now here he stood, with a wounded shoulder, wounded pride and a trembling girl needing his support now more than ever.

“Wouldn’t blame you if you did, sweetheart.” Jason sighs after crawling into bed beside you, making sure you remained ownership of all thick blankets.

“I’m sorry,” Jason whispers, peering down at you with sympathetic eyes. “I’ll try to be more careful.”

Your heart nearly melts then and there, a lingering stress vanishing from your mind for now. That’s all you asked for out of the entire argument from earlier. You knew his job was dangerous, but all you asked out of him was to be more cautious about his surroundings, to not be as reckless.

You could only help bandage and kiss his wounds so much. You never minded, but him coming home with at least three harsh gashes from possibly infectious blades put a toll on your hormonal stability.

“That’s all I wanted,” you gently say in return, accompanied with a soft sniffle.

Jason smiles before scooting just a little closer, proceeding to hold you with his good arm. A content cloud of warmth invaded your area, keeping you feeling calm and satisfied as your tired eyes mindlessly trail along his silvery autopsy scar.

“You can forgive me later,” He muffles against your cheek, lacing your skin with various gentle kisses. “Get some sleep, Hood’s gotcha now.”

You close your eyes, hiding the dramatic roll that proceeded shortly after.

“Also,” he piques in his murmur, a hint of cheekiness invading his tone of voice. “Kinda know of other ways to help with the pain.”

“Jason.” You groan with a light grimace.

He smirks a bit, only growing from the faint crinkle in your eyes and refrained smile. Just the reaction he wanted.

—

Had to throw this in 🦀

[kairiscorner]

currently watching our beloved summer (still on ep 1) and that one scene in the first episode has inspired me to make a miggy ver of this (the only thing i got from that ep was the funni car scene, everything else is just my deluluing)

ceo!miguel o'hara x secretary!gn!reader

the rapid clacking of your shoes' heels across the cement parking lot ground was reverberating throughout the air and filled your ears, distracting you from the echoing voices of your critical boss nitpicking at your plans for an upcoming event the company was going to hold in a few weeks. it angered you that your boss wasn't even going to do anything remotely related to this event, he wad just the one paying for it–and yet, the way he spoke to you about how 'overly ambitious' and 'a huge waste of money' your bolder ideas were and how 'dull and lackluster' your more simple ideas were made you confused and irritated. just what did this cranky man want? and why was it always your problem and your fault if nothing could satisfy him?

"that... geezer, what an asshole..." you muttered under your breath as you scanned your surroundings in the vast, empty parking lot. you searched for your car, clicking the buttons on your car key's face; listening for your car's beeping noises in hopes of finding the damn thing. you walked around for a bit and finally found your car; though when you tried opening it, the door wouldn't budge. you cussed under your breath and kicked the door of the car, hoping it'd open, but nothing. you kept clicking the buttons on your keys to unlock the door, but it just wouldn't open—that was, until a bigger hand wrapped itself around your own tinier ones and opened the door for you after a beep was heard from the car.

you turned around and was speechless, your boss was here—and he opened the car door, which meant... fuck.

your boss raised an eyebrow up at you and looked down at your petrified figure. "why're you trying to open my car door for me?" he asked you in a low voice as your eyes widened, your mouth running faster than your mind, and you stuttering out cut up responses that neither miguel nor you could understand. your hands shivered as your knees shook, moving away from miguel as you wondered where your car was. you clicked your key's buttons again, and you heard a faint beep in the distance, right across you two was your car, which look exactly like miguel's; it was a company-issued car, miguel got it for you without thinking much about the design, all that mattered was that you had a car to drive, but he never thought you'd be this clumsy to forget where you parked or what your license plate was.

you chuckled awkwardly and apologized to miguel about the mix-up, fidgeting with the handle of your bag as you did, making you seem a lot more agitated than you thought you'd be. miguel sighed and adjusted his glasses up on his sculpted face, looking at you with such sternness and coldness to his gaze. "just a reminder, you're not a child in school anymore; you're an adult, my secretary, might i add," he reprimanded you with such a heavy tone that made you want to really sob now—though all thoughts of sobbing were out the window as he got closer and closer to you, his breath feeling hot on your face as he stared down at you with knitted eyebrows. "i hired you because you seemed capable enough to do your job right; so don't go mixing up what's yours with what's your boss', i'm not here to deal with your clumsiness." he scolded you, your breath hitching in your throat as he looked down at you.

you gulped and nodded, feeling your face get all hot from how close he was to you. miguel pulled away and climbed into his car, closing the door and starting the car up, prompting you to leave an enter your car—but before you could even go, miguel rolled his car's window down and called out to you. you turned around and gave him your full attention, and you noticed... his face seemed a little... what was it? was he... shy? he sighed and told you he'd get one of drivers to take your car home safely for you. "but, sir, i—" "i would like to hear more about your proposals for the company event. i apologize for my... rudeness earlier, you were merely doing your job and that much i can respect."

were you dreaming right now?

the most fearsome company head you've ever dealt with is... apologizing to you? you were stammering and telling miguel that it was okay, he didn't need to apologize, he was the one paying for it and whose name would be on the line for the success or failure of this event, but miguel saw that as no excuse to have acted that way to you. he got out of his car and walked over to you, offering his hand out to you while looking away from you in embarrassment. "...i was gonna do the coffee run for today, but i didn't... wanna do it for everyone in the office, i... i want to talk more about the project with you." he told you in a hushed voice, his voice faltering and quieting the longer he spoke. he may be mean at times, and a bit too blunt and harsh, but at the end of the day, you're all miguel has to rely upon to keep himself grounded. "you do so much for me, let me, um... make it up to you; i'll drive you to get some coffee. you, um, you can decline, however, i—" you took his hand, making him stop mid-sentence. "i'll... take you up on that offer, mr. o'hara. thank you." you thanked him with a beaming smile, a genuine one, one that showed that you didn't feel as frustrated or annoyed with him as before, but rather more delighted that he was being considerate of you, which was rare for him to show so openly.

miguel looked at you with a softened look of surprise on his face, which quickly became crinkled up as he furrowed his eyebrows and looked away from you; hiding his face in his other hand. he never took his hand away from you at that moment, however, he merely grumbled his 'you're welcome' to you and led you to the front passenger seat of his car. he hadn't taken anybody out to eat or drink or catch up in a long while by himself, so of course, he was anxious, but you always had this aura about you that pretty much made some of his overthinking and anxiety melt away. this is why he loved liked you as his secretary—you could always do such an amazing job at work, and were always so good at calming him down; but he'd never tell you that was the reason why he was taking you out to this cafe, and, no... it isn't a 'date'.

...is it?

tags !! @miguelswifey04 @hearts4gabri @hisachuu @wreakingmarveloushavok @fictarian @yuridopted0 @simsrandomstuff @luvstarrstruck @popeheywardssecretgf @meeom @arachnoia @melovetitties @fable-library @ophanimgold @smokeywhalee @capnshtfce

[karlachismylife]

Soap for the character ask game plz :)

Do I really need a reason to yap about him? Nah, but I'll take it, thanks :)

If anyone else is interested, I'll be glad to talk about someone else from COD and BG3. The game itself is here if someone wants to reblog!

So. John "Soap" MacTavish.

favorite thing about them

Is "everything" a good enough answer? No? Damn. I guess I'll have to go with his passion. I can tie that to his ADHD, I can tie that to the fact that he's sunshine (and sun burns hot and flares), it doesn't matter - his emotions are bright, run hot, he's impulsive and he feels so strong. I relate to that, I also just like everything bright and flashy. His anger, his loyalty, his sense of justice, his love - they are so big and strong they cannot be contained inside his heart no matter how huge it is. This is what makes him dangerous, this is what makes him vulnerable, this is what makes him so fucking lovable to me.

least favorite thing about them

The fact that he prefers coffee over tea (source: his VA). I'm sorry, I can't stand coffee, my throat literally closes up and stops breathing if I enter some coffee-smelling space and it's not something I can control well (I tried, I swear). So the knowledge that living with Soap would involve the apartment reeking of the forbidden drink, and even worse, kissing him might taste like coffee... it's heartbreaking. I'm training that man to drink tea whether he likes it or not, coffee doesn't do anything for ADHDers anyway.

favorite line

I mean. I feel like using any of Ghoap batner here would be cheating cuz it is very much the best thing ever and also they're bouncing off each other. So I'll go with "Kids, guns and balloons. That's a new one."

It's at the start in Las Almas. I love listening to Soap in general, I love all the Scott-isms he has (even though it seems actual Scottish didn't appreciate those too much), I obviously love the funny lines he has or when he gets angry. But this one just stuck with me. Probably not because it's a Soap line, but because it's a sad line in general (and hits a little too close to home in the current situation).

But also I feel like it's kinda. The fact that I, a 22yo civilian am not actually surprised to see that "kids, guns and balloons" situation (although I am so fortunate to not be witnessing that directly), and Soap, a 26 (I think?) yo SAS Sergeant who ran off to enlist at 15-16 is. It says something about how he views the world, doesn't it? He lacks that cynicism. I've seen people say that veiwing him as a "happy go lucky" guy is incorrect, but I dunno, man. I think if someone who kills people for his job is surprised to see kids involved into crime+politics games, then he's a pretty damn optimistic lad that believes in the good in the world.

brOTP

Soap and Alejandro. There's just something so smooth, straightforward and inherently good about just two men coming to fight for what's right. Also nothing is funnier than Soap's constant cultural shock in Las Almas and Alejandro just chuckling at every silly question Johnny asks. Big brother Alejandro go go go!

OTP

Karlach x Soap for life, everything else is secondary.

nOTP

I reject the concept of nOTP, even the least likely/adhering to my tastes ships are at least interesting to explore. However, I am not a big fan of toxic relationships and such, so something like Soap x Makarov or Soap x Graves would be interesting to look at, but probably upsetting.

random headcanon

He likes the pink Orbit bubblegum, the one that comes in little stripes. His dad used to bring those at the end of the work week, sometimes unopened, sometimes with just a couple pieces left, and Soap stashed them away in his pillow case when he had the willpower not to eat them all at once. His old pillow in his childhood bedroom still smells like bubblegum.

absolutely based on my own life

unpopular opinion

I don't know what's popular to say what's unpopular. But maybe the fact that I think that Soap isn't like a total horndog 24/7? I still think he is pretty horny, more than an average person, but I also think that he's more tactile than anything and that even when he gets a random boner or just is hot and bothered, he can be satisfied with non-sexual touch. But he does not respond well to touch starvation, oh no.

song i associate with them

I am so bad at assosiating songs with characters/ships etc :( I'll be boring and repeat myself for the third time: Ren's "Loco"

favorite picture of them

That comission of him and Karlach I got, duh

But if we're talking ingame, nothing beats him being pretty and doing puppy eyes in that Milena interrogation scene. That hand reaching scene alone has me by the throat.

Thank you for asking about him!! Love youu <3

[vergess]

Okay actually I would LOVE to hear your summary of what the Dresden Files like. actually is, as a series. Because every so often some guy will demand that I read it while insisting it's Superior Literature and the best fantasy series ever (unless maybe second to Lord of the Rings, but usually not even that)

They also like to insist that well of COURSE the main character is extra sexist and never improves but it's a FLAW, the AUTHOR knows it's wrong, therefore girls should LOVE reading his sexism. So like I was not buying this any degree to begin with, but I would love to know what's actually going on here

Bro, these books are Bad(tm). Do not fucking buy them. I cannot in good conscience suggest anyone read them, ever. But I especially, immensely cannot recommend purchasing them. This is "skulking around the library not making eye contact" material.

These are bodice rippers For Men(TM).

They're also, (and for obvious reasons they aren't advertised like this) High Camp Melodrama Fantasy Where Everyone Is Bisexual. But I repeat myself.

With that in mind, they are easily the best written urban fantasy fetish pornography I've ever seen outside AO3, and frankly better than most of that stuff too. It's just... you need to be aware going in that these are serialized porn mags. They happen to have exceptionally written combat and freakishly well considered fantasy elements, but they nonetheless use the same racial and sexual shorthands seen in the bulk of heteronormative, white gaze pornography.

Also, the main guy is an obnoxious asshole on purpose from second one and he does not ever let up on this, so if you don't immediately get along with his sense of humour walk away.

Now as for whatever dipshitted asshole is telling you they're superior literature.... mmmm.... no.

They're REALLY GOOD porn. I understand how really good porn is going to emotionally confuse the highly repressed (and oh BOY do these books appeal to the repressed) into a sort of pavlovian "this is the best thing ever" response.

But like, mmmmm no.

If you do elect to read these books, I suggest casting the main guy with a Black actor in your head. That change alone makes the immense amount of police presence and abuse more palatable.

OH THE COP SHIT

I FORGOT TO MENTION THE COP SHIT

Absolutely bonkers copaganda levels.

Also, the books were um.... progressive for 2005. They are not progressive for 2024. Let's put it like this; Supernatural (TV series) was a contemporaneous peer in the same genre. If you are damned set on subjecting yourself to one of these White Boy Monster Serials, pick this one at least it fucks.

Nevertheless, the writing is surprisingly charming, the Christian fantasy elements are genuinely competitive in a post-LOTR world, and the fetish shit is fucking immaculate.

I don't think Jim Butcher is aware he's written fetish porn, but whatever, he's REALLY good at it. I cannot recommend the sex scenes and the combat highly enough.

It's just unfortunate about the everything else.

Did I mention they're Christian fantasy elements? They are. They really really really aggressively are. These books are set in a Christian-centric universe and they do NOT let you forget that. There's like... so many Christian angels in this shit.

Anyway, if you choose to join me on this cursed journey (do not join me on this cursed journey), some other stuff to note:

Lots of underage and youth fetishism

Like, I cannot emphasize enough how hot and cool all The Youths think the Main Guy is and how aggressively the book lusts-and-guilts-in-turn over The Youths

So, so, SO much incest

Gay incest also

Mafia wedding guy is there, the guy from all the mafia wedding fics on wattpad, he's canonically the main guy's soulmate (no homo) (unless..?)

Main guy has too many soulmates btw, several are gay and some are blood relations, but most are muscular blonde women because he has a serious muscle fetish; fuckin gym gay behaviours

Undiagnosed bisexuality on the majority of the characters (I'm calling it; Jim Butcher thinks bisexuality is the normal POV and this is totally how Normal Guys talk about each other's dicks)

Exorbitant amounts of racism, some of which is "on purpose" and the most of which is horrifically unremarked upon; includes plenty of racial stereotypes. Nevertheless, the cast is diverse enough (outside the circle of main love interests) that these stereotypes can come up at all, so weigh that carefully

Special shoutout to the first major love interest, a Latina woman who dies spectacularly halfway through the series after having the main guy's secret baby

Extremely confusing relationship to psychosis as a mental illness

Melodrama that would make the desperate housewives sit back and stare

Fascinatingly good about homophobia actually, in that queerbaity 2005 way

*slaps the main guy like he's a car* You can fit so much dysphoria in this cis guy

In conclusion: I see why so many AMAB bisexuals of various genders who were part of the target demo latched the fuck on to this series so hard. I myself was fooled into believing these books were "for" Straight Men, and to be clear they are. But they're also Pulpy Gay Camp Bullshit that we the faggots of the world deserve to mutilate and recreate in our own image.

Together, I believe we could fix them.

Oh right, the plot:

The Main Guy, Harry Dresden, is a private detective Wizard Cop (serial plot is investigation based) who may also be the chosen one destined to defeat some elder gods (long term plot), and along the way starts several major supernatural wars and at least 2 arms races.

[sdv-confessions]

I heard that there was a Clint hate fest going on, and I ran as fast as I could. I have an essay to write about this man.

Frankly, Clint is an unsympathetic and bad character. He doesn't have the personality or nuance of most other stardew characters, and the few personality traits he does have don't work to make him sympathetic. If his personality or storyline was tweaked slightly, I can see him working as a sort of Harvey/Shane hybrid, but as it stands, he's just boring and offputting.

to begin with: clint is a flat character. He essentially has two character traits--- blacksmithing and wanting Emily. The problem isn't that he's a lonely social outcast---the problem is that he's *only* a lonely social outcast. The two characters most similar to him (Harvey and Shane) both are lonely, yes, but they also have their own interests and hobbies. Harvey's interested in aviation, Shane likes chickens. These are character traits shown to us through heart events, dialogue, and environmental storytelling. They are not just "lonely doctor" or "lonely retail worker." They have depth beyond their job and struggles.

Clint, on the other hand, is almost laughably flat. I scoured his page on the stardew wiki, and the ONLY piece of other characterization I could find for him is that he, apparently, might like blues music. We know this because of one (1) tape found in his room. That is IT. literally EVERYTHING ELSE we get from Clint are related to a) his job, b) his depression, or c) his desire for a woman. That’s literally it.

Further, he does not develop throughout the game. He begins his story being a sad and lonely blacksmith who wants Emily. He ends his story being a sad and lonely blacksmith who wants Emily. Unlike, say, George (another initially unlikeable character) Clint doesn’t grow or develop as a character. He never gets over his feelings for Emily, and he never really does anything about it either. He’s a static character who never does anything but bitch about his life.

Speaking of bitching about his life, we need to talk about that, as this is one of the only real personality trait we can draw from his dialogue. If you take a cursory scroll through his dialogue on the wiki, it’s truly astonishing how much of his dialogue is just whining about his life. For a taste:

*“Damn it, I'm too old to do anything exciting anymore. All I have to look forward to is years and years of sweaty, hot furnace-work.”*

“Maybe I can find a girlfriend on the 'internet'... What? Don't judge me! Not everyone is a cool, attractive, socially-adept farmer, you know! What's a guy like me supposed to do? *Groan*”

“I feel bad admitting it, but sometimes I wish there was a real disaster, not just some dumb green rain. Something to shake everything up, you know? Not that I want people to get hurt... I just want to feel alive... To feel like I have a purpose...”

When we combine these two traits (passive, inactive character + complaining about life constantly) we end up with a character which comes off as completely unsympathetic. He seems like a whiny, self-pitying man who, despite his seeming dissatisfaction with his life, never seems to really do anything to change it. He sees himself as a perpetual victim, and spends most of his time feeling sorry for himself.

This isn’t even addressing his view of women and relationships, which seem to be pulled straight from the comments on an incel video. His attitude towards women has been discussed at length elsewhere, and I trust I don’t need to address it. Even without the misogyny and incel rhetoric, however, I believe Clint still fundamentally fails as a character. He is flat, static, and unsympathetic, and he deserves the hate he gets.

anyway thanks for coming to my ted talk

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