#but honestly there's little else I can write right now in this situation because Teddy is having the well deserved breakdown

[runcnlove]

❛ Papa! ❜

As soon as he was scooped up into his father's arms, safe and warm, and finally got to wrap his arms around his neck, feeling like he hasn't seen and hugged him for a whole eternity ( which… Teddy wasn't sure how long that big word was, but when his fathers used that word while telling him bedtime stories their tone suggested it was more than a few days, much, much more ), and bury his face into the crook of his neck, finding that there was a new smell that clung to him in addition to the clothes that weren't like anything he ever saw him wear before but underneath it he still smelled like Papa, like home and safety and laughter and magic, Teddy did what he held himself back from doing since the moment he realized he didn't know which way is home.

He burst into tears.

Loud and filled to the brim with anguish, with fear lived through sobs, the kind that made his chest hurt and his face heat up… because he was so so scared that he would never see his parents again, never find his way home, and he was trying to be brave about it but now that his misadventure was over, now that he was back in his father's arms, something he didn't think was possible anymore, it all just came pouring out.

( And the fact that he was exhausted, hungry and thirsty didn't help at all the way he felt )

❛ Papa..! ❜ he sobbed, holding on even tighter if that was possible, as if his very life depended on never letting go of his father again, and that was the most comprehensive word he spoke because then he dissolved into hiccuping blubbering, words like 'sorry', 'scared', 'run' and 'never' the only ones that could be more or less made out.

He was apologizing for running away and telling him how scared he was and that he was never going to run away without him or Dada again, never, never ever ever.

@runcnlove

Eliot walked into the main room of the Cottage. He wore the dark, formal Earth clothes that had been his staple since Q died he became a professor, hair he couldn't stand to let a stranger touch be bothered to cut tied back in a simple bun, reading glasses carelessly left on. His mind was mainly on the essays he was grading upstairs as he went to get water on autopilot. He looked up—and dropped the glass, shattering it. "Teddy‽" he asked incredulously. The son he'd never seen and yet remembered couldn't be here. He wasn't part of this time, this world, this reality. Eliot's brain, trained in a life of apocalypse after apocalypse, began to guess what might be happening. But—who cared? Q was—well, he wasn't. Eliot was researching fixing that, but…everyone had been so sure it would ruin everything. Eliot was so very, very good at ruining everything. Margo and Fen were MIA—it had been a full year since the attempted reconstruction of Fillory, and nothing. Eliot tried to tell himself they were just having some time sync issues, but it was hard to believe. All Eliot had these days was trying to keep baby Magicians from getting themselves killed being stupid and ever-weakening hope. This made it hard to care whether this was a dream, hallucination, or the cruel trick of some bastard who had a nefarious plan. It was his baby—Quentin's baby—right in front of him. Life was too fucking long to poke at this too hard.

He approached Teddy, arms outstretched to pick him up, smile more certain than he felt. "Hey, bud. What brings you here?"

Thread here.

[yujinnieswifeu]

can you do one where the reader feels like they have lost their sex appeal and asks a friend for help to understand the situation? (Here my inspo and can you do a g!p too plz)

Pairings: sub!fem reader x g!p dom!wonyoung

Warnings: smut, g!p wonyoung (wonyoung has a dick)

a/n: hi anon! Just wanna say thanks for the inspo, i really like it when people request a plot which you did, and also i rlly hope you enjoy this cause i sure did when i wrote🥹. U didn’t request any specific idol so i just went w wony to complete ot5 and also cause i feel she would fit this inspo the best! (Btw, i recognise the fanart hehe, should i write for genshin too? 🤭)

It has been weeks since you and Wonyoung did that. Every time you try to initiate it, she would decline it, telling you she wants to go to sleep or that she was tired. It has you overthinking, what if she doesn’t like you in that way anymore? Are you just not attractive to her? So many thoughts whirl in your mind and you really needed to let it out. So who else than your bestie? Surely she can help you with this situation right?

。。。(it means time skip)

“I..I don’t know how to tell you this.” You say, feeling embarrass even thinking about the situation you were going through now, your cheeks feeling hot at the thought of telling something so personal to your best friend. But she was the only one who you could rely on whenever you had troubles. “y/nnnn, you better tell me now.” She dragged her words, rolling her eyes in slight annoyance. You had been this way for the past 30 minutes, and Rei was starting to get frustrated she was not able to get it out from you.

“Fine! Ugh, ithinkilostmysexappeal!” The words comes out quickly, the pout on your face as you look at the floor instead, suddenly finding that to be more interesting. The sudden sound of laughter floods the café instead, your head immediately shoots up, looking at Rei who was now laughing. You looked around, seeing some people stare your way and you glared at her. “Keep it down!” You whispered and she wiped the tears that escaped from laughing so much. “I-i’m sorry, i just can’t believe you just said that.” She said, now more calmly as you sighed frustratingly.

“Wony has been ignoring my advances when i try to initiate.” You say truthfully, your brows furrow in thought, your expression showing how worried you were that Rei becomes serious. “And what does she say?” She frowns, her fingers wrapping around the straw as she stirs her drink, taking a sip of it. “She just tells me she does not feel like it, sometimes she says it’s because she’s tired. I’m worried Rei.” You looked at the table as you let out your emotions, and Rei pouts as she stares at you.

“Maybe she’s just tired like she says? Honestly, i know Wonyoung could never stop loving you with how she keeps talking about you.” You looked up at her, tilting your head. “How do you know that?” You were surprised, Rei has never told you stuff concerning your girlfriend before, so it came off as surprising for you. That was until you could see the slight tint of red on her cheeks, a smirk appearing on your face instead. “Rei…don’t tell me…it’s Liz isn’t it?” You squealed, and it wad Rei’s turn to look at the floor, covering her face.

“Aha, i knew it!” You say rather too loud, attracting some eyes at your table once again, and you mutter a sorry in their direction, looking at your friend who only groans. “Yes but i can’t help it when she looks like a teddy bear most of the time!” It was your turn to laugh, but not as loud this time, with Rei quickly bringing you back to the topic at hand. “Anyways, i think you don’t need to worry so much y/n yah, maybe you just need to..up your game?” She raises her brows in a playful manner, which makes you giggle a little. “You mean…dress something that makes her want to do that with me?” She nods her head, and you give it a thought.

Dress something..what always makes Wonyoung go crazy? Your mind reeled with different images of you, and you were sure your face was red. Rei was giggling at your face, taking pictures from her phone as you groaned, trying to snatch her phone from her.

。。。

You were nervous, your heart was racing every millisecond at this point, you looked at yourself one last time in the mirror, the headband rested on your head was one with bunny ears, and you had wore a lingerie with her favourite colour red. When Rei told you earlier to wear something that would make her go crazy, you immediately thought of this since you had wore something similar before and it had made her go feral. You just hoped the outfit you had on would make her go as feral as that time.

Soon you could hear the sounds of keys jangling, the door opening, and her voice ringing throughout the house.

“Baby i’m home!” She had said, and instead of replying or your usual, where you would greet her with a hug, you immediately jumped on the bed, sprawling yourself out instead to look sexy for her. “Babes?” Her voice echos again, and you could hear the door to your shared bedroom open, your heart was racing as she opens the door fully, her eyes immediately on yours as she froze there on the spot. Her eyes were boring holes into your skin, it made you feel naked, the electric feeling running through you. “Welcome home Wony..h-how do you like my outfit? I dressed up for you since you haven’t been giving my body attention a-and though-” She stops your rambling instead by kissing you with hunger, her hands lost in your hair as she slides them down your back, feeling your skin on her fingers as you melted into her, moaning against her lips.

She pulled away, her eyes now a darker shade of brown, as she bit her bottom lip. “My bunny wants attention that bad huh?” There was that nickname, you only whimper at her words, her hand slides up to play at your headband, stroking the ears as her eyes stayed glue to yours. “Fuck..you make me so hard y/n..” She whispers against your ears, her tongue probes out, flicking against your earlobe as she grinds herself against you, making you feel how hard she was and you gasp, your fingers around her back pulling her closer to you. “Y-you feel that bunny?” Panting, she pulls away, giving you a show as she undo her blouse and unclasps her bra quickly, the bra falling off as she throws it somewhere across the room, leaving the blouse on as she knew what it does to you.

Moving next to you, she pats her lap and you get the message, your thighs over hers as you watch her undo her belt. The bulge was already obvious, poking at her pants wanting to be freed of its confinements. It only makes you squirm on her lap, watching her as she finally pulls down her pants, helping her to get rid of it fully as you throw it at the edge of the bed. You stared at her covered bulge again, a damp spot evident on her panties. It makes you bite your lips, and you hear her clicking her tongue. “Eyes up here bunny.” The nickname rolls over her lips, making you whimper again as you look up into her eyes, feeling like a prey as she stares into yours like a predator. “I want to see you bounce on me bunny, you’re good at that aren’t you? You’re a bunny after all” She cocks her head to one side, and you nod your head desperately. The feeling between your legs was uncomfortable at this point, just aching to be filled with her cock.

You feel her pressing her fingers over your clothed area, the pressure on your clit makes you move your hips, moaning softly for her. She bites her lips, watching you as you masturbate on her fingers, it only makes her harder. She stills your hips with her other hand, sliding your panties to one side, looking down at how wet you are, it almost makes her moan. “Fuck…you’re such a fucking tease huh bunny? Wearing my favourite colour on you..and those bunny ears, you know what it does to me.” She groans, feeling her squeeze at your hip where her hand stayed, before feeling her pull your body closer to her, reaching to take her cock, stroking it and slapping it over your clit.

You gasp, your hands gripping her shoulders as she continues to slap her tip over your clit, making it red and puffy just how she likes it. “So pretty for me, i love you like this bunny..now show me how you bounce on my cock.” She orders, making you whine out. Your hand goes to your panties, wanting to take them off before feeling her hands stop you. “Don’t. I want it on bunny.” She warns, her eyes glaring into yours to not talk back which makes you gulp instead, feeling her guide her tip over your sopping hole. Your eyes rolls to the back when you feel her tip past your hole, the feeling only makes you moan loudly, gripping at her shoulders.

She pulls you down slowly over her cock, letting you adjust to her size before she was fully inside of you. The feeling only makes you whimper, as you start to bounce on her cock. She groans as she watches you move up and down on her cock, her hands goes to your ass, giving them a small squeeze before spreading your asscheeks apart, stretching your hole. It only makes it easier for you to move all the way, the added sensation causes your body to tremble slightly, a shiver running down your spine as you continue to milk her dry.

“W-what a good bunny.” She praises you, pressing her lips on yours as you both make out messily, her tongue slides across your bottom lip asking for access and you part your lips, the feeling of her tongue around yours makes you moan softly, still bouncing on her cock. You could feel her fingers running up your spine, making you shiver as she goes to unclasp your bra.

Pulling away from the kiss, she watches you as you continue to masturbate yourself over her cock, the feeling of your walls wrapping around her makes her moan softly, her hand goes over to your breasts as they shake with each bounce, stimulating them. She could feel your walls tightening around her, making her head tilt to the back as she lets out a throaty moan. “S-so fucking tight bunny.” She groans out, before gripping on your hips, guiding you over her cock.

You could feel your stomach coil, the need to come washes over you “I-i need to cum please Wony?” You struggle to say, and she holds your hip in place, driving her cock in and out of your pussy instead. You cry out, head lost in her neck as she moves her hips even faster, fucking you roughly, making your eyes roll. “I-i’m going to breed this pussy full of my bunnies, o-oh fuck fuck fuck, cum with me bunny!” Her words only sends you over the edge as you cum all over her cock, your eyes rolls back as you see white, crying out her name as your walls closes around her, feeling her seeds paint your insides white.

She pants softly, your head nestled in her neck as you both take some time to come down from your shared orgasms. “Wow.” She wearily says, her fingers drawing lazy circles on your back. You look up at her, and she smiles down at you. “Finally back to earth?” She teases, and you roll your eyes playfully. “Well no, i’m still in heaven.” You reply, a smile forming on your face and you could see her cheeks turn slightly red. It was like a whole different demeanour from when she fucked you, but you liked it either way.

“You going to tell me why you dressed up as a bunny now?” She changes the topic, and it makes you bite your bottom lip nervously. “I just…just thought that i lost my sex appeal.” You tell her truthfully, and her brows furrows in thought, thinking back on how she has been the past few days, the realisation hits her and she sighs. “Baby, look at me.” She says, making you look up into her eyes and she cups your cheeks in her palms. “I’m sorry, i didn’t notice i was neglecting my poor bunny, but i swear i still love you okay? I’ve just been really busy with work and just want to sleep each time i hit the bed.” She pouts, her eyes now looking sad as she stares at your face. You gave her a comforting smile instead, before pressing your lips on hers once more.

“And i’m sorry i did not communicate this with you sooner, it was wrong of me too.” She giggles, her infamous grin appearing on her face instead. “Well, i quite like this one though, you looked so hot in that bunny outfit.” She bites her bottom lip, and you only hide your face against her neck, whining for her to stop teasing you. Giggling, she pulls your face to hers, pecking your lips. “I love you my bunny.” She says, her forehead against yours. “I love you too Wony. And we should wash up now.” You were about to pull away before she pulls you back into her embrace.

“No, let’s stay in this position for a while, i like being inside of you my bunny.” She teases, and you knew you had a long night ahead of you.

[bvccy]

Hi!!! Hope you're doing great

Can I please have a mix between number 2 from the soft and 8 from the dark one

Thanks, lost of love ❤❤❤

Thank you so much, nonnie! I am so sorry this took so long, I meant to post yesterday but it wasn’t done. Also, the 8th dark prompt was requested just before you sent in this one, so that is filled separately here.

I tried to do the mix you asked for, and I took the liberty of writing this with Bucky (specifically 40s!BB), and I hope that it’s ok. It’s a bit of a more specific story, actually, that I’d wanted to write for a while. I also did a kind of first for me, because it involves Steve x reader as a backdrop 😂 Anyway.

Lots of love to you too, my dear! 💗💗💗

— PAIRING: soft!dark!Bucky x Reader • preserum!Steve x Reader — PROMPT: Asteria - gazing at one’s object of affection, from afar + Prassius - an impossible desire, and unclean love — LINKS: Masterlist • love stones prompt list — WORDCOUNT: 2.5k

It had taken long enough, and sometimes it seemed like it would never happen, but he finally found Steve a girlfriend — or rather, his girlfriend found him one. Dottie had exhausted several of her close friends and most acquaintances, but she knew how tired Bucky was of seeing his friend mope around, feeling like a third wheel, getting into trouble to pass the time. And honestly she liked Steve too, just not like that — but, wonder-worker that she was, Dottie found a girl that did.

She agreed to come on a double-date one night, and she and Stevie hit it right off. It was the first time Bucky met her too, and he didn't think much of the girl. Small, shy, not quite sickly-looking but not far from it, shoes a bit scuffed, clothes a bit too big for her and smelling of plain soap — in a word: perfect. She was perfect for his sickly, skinny friend who nobody else wanted, and by the looks of things, nobody had wanted her either because she seemed to have no idea what to do around a dance hall. As they were returning home that night, he even heard her confess to Steve that she had never been to one before.

They went out on two more dates, all four of them, within as many weeks. Bucky loved to dance, and Dottie too, but Steve and his girl weren't so fond of tripping over their feet and being laughed at. So they sat together at the table like a pair of broken toys, sharing an ice cream sundae, swinging shoulder-to-shoulder with the music when they liked the tune. Bucky waved at them when their eyes met, and they waved back and cheered at his dancefloor performance, but that happened less and less as they got caught up in each other. Steve would start to sketch things on the napkins while they chatted: the band, the sea of dancers, the fancy chandeliers, and eventually her.

"She said nobody's ever drawn her picture before," his friend said dreamily as they walked back, after they wished a good night to the girls. "Can you believe that?"

"Sure can…"

"She almost didn't let me do it. But she's so pretty, Buck."

"Mhm, nice girl."

"I mean yeah, she's no Dottie, but… I don't know, there's just somethin' I like so much about her… I guess her eyes, the way they look when she's smiling, or how her hair looks when the sun shines on it…"

"Get a load a' you," he grinned, wrapping his arm around Steve's shoulder in a playful grip that moved his friend's whole body. "One dame's sweet on you, and all of a sudden you're Romeo."

"At least I'm not a punk like you," Steve teased, slipping from his grasp.

"You know what I like best about her?"

"What?" he asked, with a hint of jealousy.

But Bucky smirked without a care. "How she keeps you out of trouble."

It had, indeed, been a while since Steve got in an alley brawl, and by their fifth date his last few bruises healed. He'd almost gotten into one by a cotton candy stand at Coney Island, but his girl was there to pull him back.

"Stevie, leave him alone…"

"You heard what he said?!"

"Who cares," she sighed, clinging to his arm and throwing the other man a hateful look. "Come on, didn't you want to win me that stuffed teddy bear?"

"Better listen to your girl, pal."

"Oh go find a sty to wallow in," she hissed.

"I ought'a smack some manners into you, you two-bit broad!"

"I'd worry about my own manners if I were you, buddy." Bucky slipped between them, coming from behind, standing now close enough to punch the guy if things got heated. But, seeing himself outnumbered, the other man cursed them and left. Just then, Dottie finally caught up.

"What's going on?" she asked, a little out of breath.

Bucky turned around, and was met by the heart-melting sight of Steve and his girl holding each other, her hands on his cheeks as she quietly chastised him, but loving enough that it made him smile and giggle. She closed it with a kiss to his cheek that made the boy blush, and a kittenish rub of their noses together.

"Nothing, everything's fine."

It was around the time they went to see a movie together that Bucky's joy for Steve turned into something else. They sat in the back while some musical played, and through the flashing lights and the corner of his eye, he could see his friend with his sweetheart holding hands on top of her lap throughout the whole performance. Meanwhile Dottie kept rubbing up against him, sometimes leaning her head on his shoulder, daring in the darker scenes to kiss his neck, but when she tried to get more of his attention —

"Buckyyy, what's wrong?"

— he shook her off. Hearing his name spoken by her voice suddenly felt disappointing.

He caught himself staring more and more, and not just when they went out together. Sometimes, the girl came by and spent some time with Steve, looking at his newer sketches, trying her hand too — oh and how disgusting they looked, Steve taking advantage of the situation to sit behind, and wrap his arms around her, and whisper in her ear. The pair greeted him cheerfully when he stepped through the living room and caught them, and he grinned back at them as he took a glass of milk, but all his appetite was gone.

And when they walked together through the park, and he saw them holding hands again… When Steve dug for some change to get her an ice cream, and they giggled stupidly as they made a mess of sharing it… When she fell asleep by his side one night at the dance hall, and Stevie woke her up with a tickle down her cheek, and she shivered and murmured like a bird and hid her face in his unworthy shoulder…

"Why don't you ever wanna dance, doll?" he asked as they were fetching drinks.

"Not much good at it, I guess," she shrugged. "The fast ones make me dizzy and I always trip."

"I can teach you. It'll work out great! Stevie teaches you to draw, I teach you how to dance… What do you say?"

The girl seemed to think, but shook her head. "Hmmm… No, not right now. Thanks," she smiled politely. "Besides, what would Stevie do meanwhile?"

She told him no just for the sake of keeping his scrawny little friend company, and Bucky had never felt more insulted — not that she wouldn't dance with him, although that hurt enough, but that he couldn't remember the last dame that gave something up just to stick with him, or got into fights for him, or kissed his wounds away, or held his hand in hers with no ulterior motive, and he'd found a girl that did that, and he wasted her on Steve.

So what if she was a little on the smaller side? So what if her dresses didn't fit right? So what if she came down with the cold at every change of season? He put up with it for Steve and he wasn't half as charming. The girl, instead, looked very delicate, more feminine in her own way, like when she braced her fingers on a table as she talked and mindlessly swung back and forth, animated in whatever she was saying, and her digits bent in such a childish way he feared they'd break, and it only made him want to kiss them. Or when she took her shoes off when she came to their apartment and he could catch a hint of shapely ankle, just perfect for his grip, or a peachy pink instep small enough to fit his palm. And when she fell asleep on their couch that one time and Bucky saw her all curled up, and noticed the arch of her hips and the cinch of her waist and pictured how good it would feel to hold them, and angle them upward, and…

Slowly, he started to appreciate some of what his friend had said that night, because she did have lovely eyes, and hair that looked so soft and warm, and her scent, unburdened by perfume, was sweet and girlish, and her lips looked kissable, and her wrists and knees and ankles too…

"Going out again, tonight?" he asked as the blond boy fixed himself in the mirror.

"Yeah, she wants to try this new place we —"

"Alright, alright…" sighed Bucky, already sick of hearing more. "So, that's all you're gonna do?"

"Well… yeah."

And then he voiced an evil thought. "Don't you ever want to… you know?"

"Y-you think we should?" Steve asked, turning away from his pallid reflection.

Bucky sat sprawled across the couch, and shrugged. "If she really likes you, she'd be up for it, don't you think?"

"I don't know about that, Buck."

"No? Ok," he nodded. "After all, what do I know?"

The aftermath of this particular advice was a draught of dates for poor ol' Steve, because just like Bucky had expected, the girl shrinked at the suggestion and couldn't stand to see him. For a while.

"Can you believe it, Buck?!"

"Yeah…"

"She'll see me again!"

"That's great, Stevie."

"What's wrong? You're lookin' real dour today."

Bucky knew he shouldn't. "I just…" He knew that it was wrong. "Look, it's great that she's forgiven you, but you gotta be realistic about this, pal." He had been happy for Steve at one point, long ago.

"What do you mean?"

But that was before he saw just how much love a girl could give, and realised he'd never felt it.

"Just don't delude yourself this is anything more than what it looks like, ok? She's only forgiven you because she knows nobody else will have her."

"That's mean, Buck."

"Yeah, well… I'm just looking out for you. You're my best friend, you know that. I don't want you getting hurt." It stuck in his throat to say it, but the bitterness stuck more.

And after Steve went to bed that night, Bucky took out the box of candy and the pricey perfume he had bought for her, threw them in the trash, and firmly promised to himself to never wait too long again.

But as he learned a bit later on, when they went back to double-dates, he might not have had a chance at all, because there was an unwitting element of truth to this cruel tirade.

"I can't exactly blame you, honey," Dottie consoled her as they stood in line for the ladies room, not knowing Bucky was just behind the thin divider leading to the men's. "If he does something like that again, I know this other fella —"

"Oh no, Dot, please… We're fine now. He explained things and… he's really sweet, I think he just had a moment of —"

"But just let me introduce you to Jim, see if you don't like him better."

"I… I don't know."

"He's a real charmer," Dottie grinned, "and he has these big, broad hands, jaw like an anvil. He just broke it off with Marcie cause she was a flirt."

He didn't hear anything next, but the girl must've shook her head cause Dottie asked, "You're sure?" and "Really? Well, if you change your mind…"

"Thanks, Dot," she lightly laughed.

"I don't know why you're so stubborn though, it's not like he's that far out your league. You just need to fix your hair a little bit and get a better brand of powder."

"It's not that easy."

"It's all it took me to get Bucky on my arm. That, and a better set of heels," she laughed.

"Yeah but you've always been pretty, Dot. Like, really pretty, and you know it. I guess some girls are for the James Barnes of this world, and some are the for the Steves."

She giggled as she said it, with not a hint of anger or resentment, and that's what stung the worst.

Bucky arranged to go see a late night movie with Dottie after that, while Steve and his girl went back to the apartment to listen to a boxing match on the radio and have some cherry sodas. Dottie went ahead to buy the tickets while Bucky walked them home, and after wishing him good night, she went upstairs to set things up. Steve was meant to go to the store and buy the drinks, but he stayed to chat with his friend a while.

"I can get some eggs and milk as well while I'm at it," he offered, swinging on his heels with his hands in his pockets.

"Sure."

"Or do we have enough for breakfast tomorrow?"

"Go ahead and buy them, pal," Bucky smiled, pretending to be less tired than he felt.

"Ok. And what about — darn!"

"What is it?"

"I just realized, I forgot to give her the keys," he said, taking a hand out of his pocket and holding them out. "I gotta get to the store, can you go up and give them to her?"

"Er, why don't —"

"You know I always trip on the stairs when I'm in hurry, Buck, they haven't changed the lightbulb yet. Don't make me do it."

"Fine, I'll go."

"I owe you big."

"You always do," he grinned, and took the keys from him.

Steve made off for the corner store, while Bucky started the long slow climb upstairs. It was completely dark inside at that hour, and the few candles some neighbours left to light the way had all gone out.

"Stevie, is that you?" he heard her call, standing right outside their door.

He kept one hand against the wall and walked his way toward her, stopping as he heard her whisper, "I think I lost the keys."

Blindly, she moved her hand forward, coming right across his chest. He felt her jolt at the unexpected contact, then burst into a giggle. Bucky could already feel the fanning of her breath right at the level of his chin. With an unseen smile, he took her hand, and placed the keys within it.

"Oh," she laughed. "You had them."

As her hand closed around them his own moved up her shoulder, fingers threading around her hair, and as he touched her jaw he felt her tilting slightly upward, shivering under the feeling.

"Is everything alright?" she asked.

He felt the warming tickle of her breath as he leaned close until, through the pitch black, he touched his lips to hers. Bucky did it lightly, just a little, just enough to taste and sip a kind of love he'd never really had. She stood surprised but took his kiss, and he felt her smiling into it, even beginning to kiss back just as he was parting from her.

"Your lips are softer than before," she giggled, in a sweet but altogether crushing way that made Bucky's heart beat stronger. "Stevie?"

Her hand moved through the air to touch him but felt nothing anymore, and down the stairs the heavy steps echoed, moving downward and away.

[fairyhee]

Chocolate eclairs (pt.2)

{Part 1}

🍫 optional bias x reader

🍫 ~5.6k words

🍫 smut, enemies to lovers, slight dom/sub themes, praise kink, some dirty talk, oral (both receiving), face sitting (whew), reader has a thing for hands

(I might have dragged everything out for too long? I’m not sure, you tell me, but I just love thinking about all the details so I went with it. Also while I was writing, at some point I lost half of it and had to re-write it because the damn app didn’t save my changes to the draft 🙃 anyways thank you for reading!)

So far, nothing was going as planned today, but somehow you didn’t mind it anymore. At first you were extremely annoyed to say the least, but you slowly started to think having a tall and ridiculously handsome guy follow you around wasn’t so bad after all. Even though he was purposely being irritating, as always, just to get reactions out of you, it was worth enduring for the random flirty remarks he spat out every once in a while. Was he always like this? Did you only realize it now because you were too busy thinking how obnoxiously confident he was, or did he really also dislike you before? You were quite confused, but you at least thought you should enjoy the moment.

After buying those damn chocolate eclairs that you had been craving for a week, and after he insisted to pay, all while poking fun at how you were gonna die at a young age from how much sugar you consume, your next stop would have been the lingerie store. Except now you had him coming along with you, so you weren’t very sure what you should do. To buy some time, you pretended to look at all the stereotypically “romantic” objects that people usually gifted each other on Valentine’s day. Just for fun, you weren’t planning on hinting at anything, but you just wanted to see what he’d be like. Not to mention window shopping was one of your favorite activities when you had nothing else better to do. He, on the other hand, had his mind fixed on one thing solely.

“Y/n, aren’t we eating those eclairs? You didn’t want them just to carry them around, did you?” he asked with a pout.

“Excuse me, since when is there a ‘we’? They’re my eclairs, and I’m saving them for later. I told you I have plans, were you even listening to me?”

“You have plans, right. Well you should be careful then, that boyfriend you have plans with might get jealous if he sees you walking around with a guy like me. I honestly wouldn’t blame him if he felt threatened, after all, you just let the most handsome dude around here buy you coffee and sweets...oh wait, I forgot. You actually don’t have a boyfriend, do you now?” he said in a sarcastic tone. 

“It’s extremely funny that you think I need a man in order to have plans on Valentine’s day. I can very well take care of myself, thank you very much.”

“You can take care of yourself in what way exactly? Because if it’s what I’m thinking of, I bet I can do it better.”

“Thank you for your concern, h/n, but if you think you can buy your way into my pants with some sweets, then you have a very low and unrealistic expectation of me. If you want to impress me, try harder.”

“Oh don’t worry, this is far from my best shot. You just look so hot when you’re mad at me, I can’t stop myself.” he said with a sheepish laugh.

You blushed slightly, both at his words and from seeing him grinning so cutely. He had no business looking all cute like that after he had just literally suggested you sleep with him. How could he switch from being so cocky to getting shy for you in just a matter of seconds? You couldn’t help but wonder what he’d actually be like in bed. Especially since he had just showed a new side of him, a particular image of him being submissive to you was stuck on your brain. You could feel your face heating up, and you hoped he didn’t notice how red your cheeks had probably become.

Brushing it off, you entered a random toy store, feigning interest in some plushies. As you were admiring the various teddy bears that came in all shapes and colors, you noticed he had been surprisingly silent since your last exchange. You threw a glance at him and he seemed to have found some games he was interested in, as he had his eyebrows furrowed, trying to read the instructions on the back of some boxes. Perfect, you thought to yourself, now that he’s distracted, you could think of a plan. What the hell were you gonna do about the lingerie? You didn’t want to give up on buying it, you had wanted it for a long time and now was the perfect occasion. Did you want to go with him? Would he want to even enter the store with you? Would he become flustered and make things awkward? Would it be weird if you suddenly told him to leave you alone for a couple of minutes and meet you later? Or should you just end your meeting right there? You weren’t even sure how you wanted to spend the rest of the day anymore, but you for sure didn’t intend to abandon your plans completely for this man that barged into your solo Valentine’s day like that, despite the fact that you were starting to get interested in him.

While you were definitely overthinking the situation, h/n had long finished browsing the board games section. Suddenly, you felt someone’s hot breath near the side of your neck. 

“Y/n. You’ve been staring at that teddy bear for 3 minutes now. Did you not have any as a child, or do you want me to buy it for you that bad? You could just ask, you know.” 

Startled by the proximity of his voice, you turned your head to him and took a few steps away. “Wow, you sure have a talent for being rude. You’re still annoying even when you’re trying to hit on me.” you said trying to seem unaffected. However, you would lie if you said that feeling his breath on your skin didn’t send shivers down your spine. 

He chuckled at your reaction and slid his hands into the pockets of his jeans. 

“So? Do you want it or not?”

“With that sort of attitude, I shouldn’t even answer. So what if I wanted it, what would you do? There’s nothing between us, so why would you buy it for me?” you taunted. You knew he was trying to make you soften up, but you weren’t falling for it just yet.

“Who said I’d buy it for you? If I did and you ended up sleeping with a stuffed toy every night, that would just be unfair.” he pouted. Why was he acting this cute now? This man was so confusing.

“What the hell does that even mean?”

“I don’t wanna be jealous of a teddy bear. I’d rather you would sleep with me instead.”

You stared at his triumphant smile for a few seconds, at a loss for words. He looked like he just made the best pick-up line ever. It was so bad, yet you wanted to accept his wish and take him home. What was wrong with you? 

“You’re absolutely obnoxious, did you know that? Wipe that smirk off your face, you look like an idiot.”

He laughed. “But somehow you’re still putting up with me. I’d say you’re doing a great job enduring me. Unless...you’re actually enjoying my company, which I suspect you do.”

“Yeah, whatever. Come on, I have one more thing to get before I can finally go home and get rid of you.”

You had made up your mind. You weren’t letting any man interfere with your plans.

Walking in the most confident way possible, you entered the lingerie store. You didn’t even spare him a glance as you looked through the pieces, searching for something that would match your taste. You were dying to know what his reaction was, what he was thinking, but you weren’t giving in. Suddenly, you had an idea. Acting like what you were doing was the most normal thing, you picked out two options, pretending you couldn’t decide between them. One was a black see-through set adorned with velvet hearts, while the other was made out of red lace and a bunch of straps that looked like a harness. Either way, both were made more to reveal rather than cover you up. Holding one in each hand, you turned to look at him with an unfazed expression plastered on your face.

“Make yourself useful for once and help me decide. Which one do I get?”

Seeing the way he was looking at you made a flush of heat spread across your face. His eyes were dark and he looked like he would have devoured you right then and there. You didn’t know what you expected, but this look was definitely not it.

He took a few seconds to respond, during which his gaze on you only seemed to intensify. He almost looked angry, clenching his jaw and eyeing you so strongly.

“You’d look great in both, but I’d take the red one.”

Hearing his choice, you immediately hung it back on the rack and took your other option to the cash register. 

You heard him scoff behind you. “Why bother asking me if you were gonna pick that one anyway?”. He was smiling, but it was clear that he was trying to control his frustration. 

You gave him the sweetest smile in the world. “I liked both equally and couldn’t decide, so I’m getting the one you like less. Since you’re never gonna see me wearing it anyway.”

“You drive me insane. That makes absolutely no sense.”

“Really? But you’re the one that’s been following me around all day. Now you’re angry with me, how come?” you said innocently.

He smirked and took a few steps until he was so close, you could feel his hot breath on your face, but you didn’t back away and maintained his gaze. His scent was intoxicating, and you were trying your best to not show how into him you were already.

“If you want to make me angry, you’ll have to try harder, babygirl.” you clenched your thighs hearing that word escape his lips. “I like your teasing a little too much, actually. But making me imagine you wearing all these pretty things only to point out that I can’t have you the way I want? I have to admit, that was pretty mean.”

“Are you challenging me? Then I guess I need to step up my game to really get back at you.”

“Alright then, let’s make a deal. If you fail to make me angry by tonight, you have to go on a date with me. What do you say?”

You couldn’t stop the smirk forming on the corner of your lips. “Deal. You know, now I kinda understand why you keep bothering me. It’s actually fun trying to get you annoyed.” This time you weren’t lying.

He smiled back at you. “Glad we’re on the same page about one thing at least. So, any other torturous shopping that we need to do today? An adult store, maybe, since you said you like to take care of things yourself?”

“Nice try. I actually have a table reserved for later today, so I’m gonna have to go home and get ready. I wanted to go alone and have some me-time, but since I don’t plan on losing that challenge, I guess now you gotta come with me.”

He stopped in his tracks. “Wait a second,”he said and put the back of his palm on your forehead as if checking for a fever, “now it sounds like you’re the one asking me out. What happened? Are you okay?” he asked in an overly dramatic way. Oh great, now he was back to being the town circus. 

“It’s not a date, silly. Hopefully, it’s gonna be the worst dinner of your life, so I won’t have to see your face ever again.”

“You do know that I could just not show up and make you lose the bet, right?”

“If you do that, you won’t get my number. So no way to receive your prize.” Besides, you thought to yourself, wasn’t tonight already a date in itself? There was no way he would skip on that, or at least so you hoped. “See you at 6.” you said as you walked away, leaving him behind. 

By now your only desire was to get him totally whipped for you. He might have seen through your intentions already, but you couldn’t care less. The fights and arguments that were real in the beginning had now become an act, some sort of game to see which one of you would give in first. And you weren’t backing down until you had him completely wrapped around your finger. This year’s V-day turned out to be a lot more fun than you initially thought. 

After getting home, you took your sweet time showering and making yourself as pretty as possible. Having drenched yourself in perfume and strawberry scented body lotion, you put on the new lingerie and a red dress that complimented your figure. You did some minimal, but flattering make-up and took a good look in the mirror. You looked good enough to eat. Exactly what you wanted.

By the time you arrived at the restaurant, he was already waiting for you, and you realized he had probably tried just as hard as you to look hot. And he had definitely done a great job. His hair was pushed back and the suit jacket he was wearing highlighted his broad shoulders and tall figure. You wanted him to push you against a wall right then and there.

“Are you sure you’re not made out of sugar? You look so good, I’m afraid that if I touch you, you’d melt under my fingers.”

“You wish. I don’t even get a hi, you start our conversation with a lame pick-up line? This evening is going to be even more boring than I thought.” you said rolling your eyes.

“It’s good to see you again too. Come on, let’s order quickly, I’m starving.” he said as he was already looking through the menu.

After this first exchange, the rest of the dinner actually went on pretty normally. Without realizing, you had gotten comfortable with each other and stopped arguing altogether. Now you were just chatting about whatever came to mind, enjoying your meals and each other’s company. However, you did notice his eyes lingering a little too long on your exposed neck and chest, which you did your best to bring forward as much as you could when you moved around. You were hyper aware of his gaze on every move you made and you loved the attention he was giving you. You felt like you were the only woman in the room for him, the only one that deserved his attention. You suddenly remembered you were supposed to get him angry, but you weren’t sure you didn’t want a second date after all. However, you felt the need to say something about it.

“Look at all these couples enjoying their romantic dinner, and then there’s us. Here for the sole purpose of annoying each other.”

“If that was the purpose, I’d call this an epic fail.” he said with a smile and took a sip of his gin tonic,”So you still don’t want to admit that this is, in fact, a date?”

“Why would it be one, when we haven’t done anything out of the ordinary? We are just two people eating out together.”

“Good thing the evening isn’t over, then. Great choice of restaurant, by the way. But even though the food was amazing, I’d still prefer eating you out.” 

His bluntness caught you off guard, and you let the glass you were previously holding down on the table with a little more force than intended. From the impact, your drink splashed everywhere, including on yourself.

You moved a bit of the fabric of your dress away so you could wipe the martini drops that had just spilled on your chest, which uncovered the strap and the top part of your bra for a few seconds. You didn’t think much of it, but heard him swallow loudly. When you raised your eyes back to meet his, he was looking at you like he wanted to undress you with his eyes.

“You did that on purpose, didn’t you?”

“Did what on purpose?” you asked confused.

“Don’t act so innocent, you know exactly what I’m saying.”

“No idea what you’re talking about. Anyway, care for dessert? You need some sugar in your system, you seem to be turning grim again.”

“If by dessert you mean you, then I’ll gladly accept. You have enough sugar to keep me up for a long time.” he said with a smirk.

“Oh god, can you cut the disgusting jokes out? You make me sick.” 

“You’ll be even more disappointed to find out they’re not jokes. By the way,” he leaned over the table so he could bring his face a little closer to yours, “we’ve almost finished our drinks and you still haven’t made me angry. Time is ticking.” 

You fell silent for a couple of seconds, and played with your necklace while deep in thought. You were done playing this game. You wanted him, and you wanted him tonight. You wanted to blame it on the alcohol, but ever since you stepped foot in that place all you had been imagining were his veiny hands all over your body, how pretty his long fingers were and how much you wanted them inside you. He hadn’t even touched you once, but your panties were feeling damp already just by staring at his hands or seeing him clenching his jaw. You hadn’t noticed that your fidgeting with your necklace had caught his attention and he was now practically staring at your boobs without any hint of shame in his eyes. Your chest was heaving up and down as his eyes set your skin ablaze and your thoughts ran wild. Of course his gaze didn’t miss your heavy breathing. His fist was clenched on his glass and the veins on his arm protruded even more than usual. Your brain was so intoxicated with him that it completely forgot how to form sentences, leaving him without a reply. He leaned closer to you over the table and all but whispered.

“Just say the words, and I’ll give you whatever you want. All you have to do is say it.”

You hesitated, questioning whether you should swallow your pride or not. You stared into his deep brown eyes, glistening with lust, and admired his plump, slightly parted lips, silently pleading for you to stop this stupid game and finally admit what you’re feeling for each other. He was done playing, and so were you.

“It’s finally time for those eclairs.” 

A knowing smile spread on his face, as if he had just won the lottery.

The ride to your place was awfully silent. You felt like you could cut the tension in the atmosphere with a knife. Sitting near him in the back of the cab and just feeling his presence so close to you kept your skin burning up during the entire ride. He still hadn't touched you in the slightest, not even on your hand, and at this point you thought it was intentional just so you'd become desperate for him. It was working. It felt like the drive was taking ages, so you decided to have some fun and tease him a little.

You slowly slid your hand over your legs, starting from your knees and going up towards the hem of your dress, pulling it up ever so slightly. He noticed your movements instantly, and his eyes snapped to you. Now that you were assured he was watching, your hand traveled further under your dress, carefully so it doesn't reveal too much, and started running your own fingers across your damp panties.

His eyes widened, and you saw his adam's apple move when he swallowed a lump in his throat. "What do you think you're doing?" he whispered.

"What does it look like to you? I am an independent woman. Since you have not laid a hand on me all day, I'm doing it myself."

"You're an impatient one, aren't you?" you maintained his gaze but didn't stop your actions, slipping a finger underneath your underwear and whimpering ever so quietly, enough for only him to hear. You were determined to bring him down.

Like you had just pressed a button, his body reacted to your sounds faster than expected. The vein on his hand twitched as he quickly grabbed your wrist and held it in place.

"If you don't stop that, I’ll make sure you have trouble walking tomorrow." his words sent a shiver down your spine. With that, he firmly pulled your hand away and intertwined his fingers with yours, as if preventing you from causing more trouble. You decided to obey him, for now.

After a couple of minutes, you were arriving at your place. He followed you silently into the building and into the small elevator, where you were met with another crisis. He looked like he tried really hard to restrain himself as he leaned with his back and head against the mirror. He was looking at you through furrowed brows and hooded eyes, and you wondered why did he put himself through this struggle, when he could’ve had you right then and there. Pretending to check your mascara in the mirror behind him, you placed one hand on his chest and leaned over him, your face dangerously close to his neck, making sure your exposed cleavage pressed against him in the process. You didn’t care how obvious it was, he was clearly enjoying it. He did nothing but watch you, but his sigh and accelerating breath rate were giving him away. As soon as you reached your level, you instantly shot out of the elevator and got to your door in record time. 

The moment you set foot into the apartment and closer the door behind you, any control that you had before, just vanished into thin air. 

“Fucking finally”. He wasted no time in pressing you against the wall, both hands holding the sides of your face while he kissed you with all the pent up frustration from that day. You could feel his whole body onto you and yet you wanted more, your hands grabbing fistfuls of his shirt and tugging at it in an attempt to bring him even closer. His lips were soft but aggressive at the same time, the kiss neither too intense nor too slow, earning chills all over your spine the first time his warm tongue entered your mouth. It was still not enough, so you took over and laced your fingers at the back of his head, pulling on his hair while pushing yourself into him. His hands started traveling down your body, gripping your waist and hips with force as he pulled you even closer, making you feel his erection against you in the process. 

Out of breath, you broke the kiss to take a good look at him in this state. He was looking at you through glossy, hooded eyes, with his plump lips parted and glistening from the intensity of your kiss. He looked so hot, you realized you might not make it to the bedroom. 

Closing in the distance once again, his hands went to squeeze your ass through your dress as he started placing wet kisses down the side of your neck, painfully slowly, sending shivers all over your spine. You lifted a leg up to snake around his own, as if to invite his hands to stop wasting time and get under your skirt already.

“You’re surprisingly gentle for someone who’s been trying to get into my pants all day.” you felt him squeeze your ass harder, and he suddenly bit the soft skin under your ear and sucked on it, earning a gasp from you.

He didn’t reply, but instead slid his hand up your thigh and ran his fingers over your soaking panties.

“And you’re surprisingly wet for someone who supposedly hates me.” he teasingly rubbed the tip of his finger on your clothed clit, making you whine in response. It was almost as if the fabric wasn’t there at all, given how thin it was in the first place. “What did you buy this pretty underwear for, just to ruin it later?”

“Since when do you care about my lingerie?”

“I thought you wanted me to, since you brought me with you to that store and even asked for my opinion.” He pushed your panties to the side and properly coated his fingers with your juices. “You were such a dirty little slut for doing that to me.” his words shot straight to your core.

“Me, dirty? That little head of yours has a lot of issues. It’s your own fault for liking me in the first place.” you teased.

Hearing that, he pushed two fingers into your hole and you moaned. “You can talk shit all you want, but your body can’t lie about how much you want me, princess.” He pulled his hand away from your core, and took his own fingers, now coated with your essence, into his mouth, licking them clean. “Now be a good girl and take this dress off for me.” he said, pulling away from you. 

Not wanting to torture yourself any longer, you obeyed him, getting rid of your dress as quickly as possible. As he finally fully saw you in the pretty underwear, he eyed you from head to toe, as if he was looking at his prey, swallowing loudly. “Y/n, you’re so fucking gorgeous.” 

You pushed him back and led him to the couch, making him sit down. You quickly straddled his lap, making sure your boobs were right in his face as you grabbed the hair at the back of his head and brought your mouth to his ear, licking a stripe up from the side of his neck, reaching his earlobe. He shivered under you, and you started unbuttoning his shirt, while both his hands stroked over your boobs, touching your nipples and lightly pinching and twisting them over the thin material of the bra. The sensation was spreading into your entire body, making you moan right into his ear. You nibbled onto his earlobe, and he sighed loudly, grabbing your ass and pulling you on top of his dick, grinding into you. Your fingers ran over his now exposed chest and down to his belt, trying to get it undone. He grabbed your hands and undid it himself, and you stood up so he could get rid of his pants. 

Instead of sitting back on his lap, you dropped to your knees in between his legs and pulled his underwear down. His cock looked so red and hard, it seemed almost painful, and made your mouth water. You wanted to torture him some more though, so you stuck your tongue out and slowly ran it up from the base to his swollen tip, all while looking directly into his eyes. His eyebrows were furrowed and he was biting his lower lip so hard, as if to keep him from making any sound. You were going to change that. You swirled your tongue around the tip, collecting the drops of precum, before taking him whole into your mouth. As you started bobbing your head, you made sure to take a little more of him each time, pushing your own limit gradually, looking up at him from time to time. “Fuck, you look so pretty like this. You’re taking me so well.” he said, trying to keep himself from forming any other sounds, and you wondered why wasn’t he letting go already. You wanted to make him a moaning mess. One of your free hands started playing with his balls, as you ran your nails across his thigh with the other one. Going a little deeper, his cock hit the back of your throat, and you paused for a second, swallowing around him, which earned a long, breathy moan from him. There, that was your reward. You continued taking him as deep as you could, looking up at him with wide eyes. This was his breaking point, as he couldn’t control his sounds anymore, his mouth was agape, letting out small grunts and whimpers now and then, and you felt his hips struggling to keep still. As the ache in your pussy was getting unbearable because of your actions, your own hand came to play with your clit to get some sort of release, moaning around his cock. 

He didn’t miss this, as suddenly, his hand flew to your hair and he held you still. “Don’t you dare touch yourself. Get up” he said in a demanding voice. He followed you up himself, and completely slid his shirt and underwear off of him, then laid down on the carpet. “I want you to sit on my face. Let me have my dessert and enjoy you like you deserve.”

You didn’t need to be told twice. After discarding your panties, you placed your knees on either side of his head and carefully lowered your cunt closer to him, but he grabbed your ass and aggressively pulled you onto his mouth, making you gasp and grip the couch beside you for support. The feeling of his wet and warm tongue against you was making your thighs weak. He started by licking a long stripe across your folds, then alternated between sucking at your clit, drawing patterns with his tongue across your sensitive spot at different paces and intensities. Your sounds and whimpers were a mess, and you could feel your orgasm building with each second. He was eating you out like a starved man, face buried completely under your pussy, and the view was only contributing to your arousal. One of his hands snaked up to your nipple and started playing with it, adding to the sensation. When he suddenly applied more pressure to a certain angle, you thought you were gonna lose your mind. “Fuck, h/n, right there, please, don’t stop” was what you wanted to say, but you weren’t sure your words came out coherently. Either way, he got the message, and a few seconds later, you were coming undone on his tongue, letting out a few high-pitched moans as he helped you ride out your high.

After regaining composure, you stood up to let him breathe. His lips and chin were glistening from your juices, and he wiped them off with the back of his hand. “That was delicious. You’re a fucking goddess, did you know that?” he said as he stood himself up, grabbed your face and kissed you with force.

“Just fuck me already.”

“You don’t need to tell me twice.” he said as he pushed you against your table, having you lie down on it. He quickly grabbed a condom from his jeans and rolled it on his still painfully hard cock. Grabbing your legs and holding them on each side of him, he rubbed the tip of his member over your clit a few times before fully pushing it into your tight hole, swearing in the process. He wasted no time before moving, slowly at first to let you adjust, then suddenly slammed his hips into you with force, earning a loud moan from you. “Fuck, do that again, please” you said, already feeling your second orgasm starting to build up. He thrusted into you harder and deeper, filling the room with your sounds everytime his skin met yours. The way he filled you up was absolutely delicious, clouding your vision and making you lose yourself in your pleasure as he was hitting all the right spots inside you. 

“Ever since your brought me into that store, all I could think of was fucking you in your pretty lingerie, imagining how your boobs would bounce up and down while I pound into you like this.” you took his hand and brought it to your lips, silently asking him to let you suck onto his fingers. “You don’t know how much of a torture that wa- fuck” you took his long and pretty fingers into your mouth and swirled your tongue around them, mimicking the way you sucked him off earlier and watching him lose his ability to speak as his mouth hung open. “H/n, harder, don’t stop, I’m going to come.” you said in a desperate attempt to get him to shut up and concentrate. Motivated by your words, he increased his pace, and after a few more hard and sloppy thrusts, you reached your second orgasm, soon followed by his own. His whole body twitched as he came down from his high, both of you panting, and exhausted.

Pulling out of you, he quickly discarded the condom and took you into his arms to place both you and him comfortably on the couch.

“That was fucking hot” he said, still holding you in his arms while you were catching your breaths. 

“Yeah. I think I might hate you a little less after this.” you said and you both laughed.

After coming back to your senses, you got up and went straight to the kitchen. A few seconds later, you came back holding the box he bought you from the french bakery, handing him an eclair.

“I knew why I saved those chocolate eclairs for later. They taste better after you’ve been craving them all day, don’t you think?”

He just smiled in response. “You might be right. By the way, I won. It seems like you’ll be drinking ice americanos again, after all.”

[blush-and-books]

always you-shaped thoughts inside my head

so, we found wonderland, the amazing fanfic by @pink-flame ended this week. as a result of my deep and sorrowful mourning, i wrote a fanfic for a fucking fanfic. yes, everyone, we have reached that point. so if you’re one of the unfortunate souls who hasn’t read it then you can start here and do not read this if you don’t want spoilers babes!!!!

anyways, i don’t want to talk about how much i cried when i wrote this. moving on. title from find u again by mark ronson ft. camila cabello and once again THANK YOU @pink-flame FOR THIS WORK, I LOVED IT, I LOVE YOU, ENJOY

A/N: the first part of this is a reimagining of a scene from the story, and the second part is more of a deleted scene. grab tissues if you’re one who cries easily. also tagging @bluefirewrites because i kept texting you while writing this

Julie doesn’t know in what timeline she thought that going to the bookstore would be a good idea. 

Even with her back flat against the wall and Luke’s book clutched identically between her hands and the palms of every other eager fan in the room, she felt like she was too close. Like this was a mistake.

She was the one who insisted they don’t look for each other. 

But here they were. Him, with a poem that crossed time with the silent, lost plea for her to come back to him; her, who chose to answer the call even if she knew she shouldn’t have. Julie should have realized that she couldn’t avoid him forever. Their paths were meant to cross in every universe. 

When he takes the stage, she doesn’t shatter. Yet. 

People are swamped beside her and Flynn on all sides, and she still feels like it’s just the two of them. Once he’s in her line of sight, it’s only him in the room, only him that exists. 

In a world where she’s jumped to and from across time, Luke may be the most real thing she’s ever known. 

The words he says as he reads and answers questions hit her ears as just a series of tones and syllables that are achingly familiar. He’s laughing through one of the book’s anecdotes and suddenly she’s back in the arcade, laughing with him at the pinball machine. He’s talking about the rush of playing their first sold-out show, and she’s back in the greenroom as he heatedly kisses her up against a wall after she spent so much time fighting for him to love her again. 

He’s reading about his parents, and she’s back on that pull-out couch that was only comfy when he was in it; listening to him whisper about their fragmented relationship. 

But then a 20-year-old pokes him about the poem. And he says he loves her -- well, not explicitly, but he says it’s about love -- and the other shoe drops. 

Tears inundate her eyes. 

“I have to go,” her voice shakes as a sob threatens to rip through her words. Flynn offers to join, but Julie needs fresh air and to be alone and to just let her tears fall onto the asphalt of an alleyway without feeling the need to explain herself. She will always be alone in these emotions, in this heartbreak, and that’s okay -- she just doesn’t want anyone to act like they get it.

So she passes her book to Flynn, urges her to get it signed, and flees out the side door. 

Right before she’s out, the 20-year-old presses on about Find Me: “Well, what if they came to you now? What if they found you? Wouldn’t you be happy to see them?”

The exit slams shut behind her and she doesn’t get to hear his answer. 

--

“Well, what if they came to you now? What if they found you? Wouldn’t you be happy to see them?”

Flynn watches intently as Luke’s eyes darken. The book feels heavy in her hands, and she feels like she is suddenly intruding on an intimate moment between Luke and Julie -- even with Julie gone. 

She didn’t always understand what happened with her best friend. But this was clearly a mind, body and soul situation. 

Luke has to clear his throat and blink rapidly before answering. “God, sorry, that one caught me a little!” The audience chuckles. “No one’s asked me that so far on this tour. That’s a good question. I probably think about it more than I should, but… I mean, first of all, they wouldn’t come and find me. I know them well enough to know that Find Me just… Went out into the universe with no expectation of a response. But if they decided too, I… I’d wanna make sure they were happy. And I’d probably thank them one more time for everything they did when I was younger. I would probably be in shock, honestly. I haven’t seen them in a long time.”

Flynn is wiping her nose with a stray tissue from her purse before she can even register that she’s started crying. 

The random people in the back row with her send her strange looks, wondering why she’s getting so emotional, but hearing Luke talk about her best friend like that… 

“Do you still love them?”

God, this person won’t give him a break!

The rockstar visibly tenses up, and the easy grin plastered on his face breaks. That’s when his manager hustles onstage and announces that they are going to start the signing; and everyone needs to start lining up. 

Flynn has to fight to get farther up in line, but it’s worth it when she reaches him.

“Hi,” he smiles, “who should I make it out to?”

The word makes her tongue feel like lead. “Julie.”

His head snaps up, and he’s fully looking at her for the first time. There are a thousand Julie’s in the world, but he knows it’s his. 

“I’m her best friend,” Flynn continues, shifting her teary eyes down to her converse because fuck Julie wasn’t kidding when she said his eyes were intense sometimes. 

“Flynn.”

“Oh... She told you-”

“Where is she? Is she here?”

She’s not even looking at him, but he sounds so desperate, and the water in her eyes swells as she glances at the exit off to her side. “Not right now. But she wanted me to get this signed for her.”

Luke’s Sharpie doesn’t move across the inside cover. In fact, he’s frozen; staring off in the distance with what Flynn is sure must be a whirlwind of emotion that he didn’t ask for. Flynn isn’t sure how to handle it -- they’re in public, and she’s minorly concerned she just sent him spiraling, and they don’t even know each other -- but she feels the need to relay a message since he’ll never get to hear it from Julie himself. 

“She…” Luke looks back up at her; eyes boring into hers in a way that could tug the truth out of anybody. As she blinks, an enthusiastic tear drops onto her cheek, and she instantly lifts her index finger under her eye to catch anything else. “Fuck, my eyeliner. Sorry. Anyways-”

The words get caught in her throat again, so she has to take another deep breath. Helping star-crossed lovers communicate when they are almost thirty years apart is more emotionally taxing than she anticipated. 

“She’s really proud of you,” Flynn finally manages with a voice squeakier and higher than she ever wants to hear it again. Another tear falls from her other eye. “She loves y- your music, and hopes that you have everything you wanted and she’s so proud of you for everything you’ve built.”

At this point, the crumpled tissue in her hand has been helping her dry her eyes because standing in front of Luke Patterson and trying to tell him that the love of his life still cares -- still watches from afar, still wants the world for him -- is making her realize the emotional turmoil that Julie must have been feeling all this time. 

How did she do it?

In front of her, Luke is rubbing his hands over his face and audibly takes a deep, sniffly breath in. Turning to the same woman who got onstage to transition the event before, he informs her: “I need to get some air.”

“Luke, where are you-”

But he’s already forcefully pushing himself back in his chair, grasping the book off of the signing table, and darting out the same exit that Julie stormed through ten minutes ago. 

When the manager turns to look at Flynn -- she bolts away and towards the front entrance. If Julie and Luke are about to meet in that alleyway, she doesn’t want to intrude. Even if she already fucked up both of their plans to never see each other again. 

--

Julie is still hyperventilating and sobbing in the alleyway when the emergency exit loudly flings open against the wall of the bookstore. Her arms are wrapped tightly around herself with a childish prayer to have Teddy Luke in her arms, because at least then there would be a little piece of him to stay with her when the rest of him is gone.

She’s expecting Flynn, or an employee on their smoke break, but not-

“Luke.”

“Julie.”

A whimper leaves her lips at hearing him say her name for the first time in so long. His own eyes are glassy, and even though he’s so much older his eyes are still the same. He’s still her Luke, and that’s such a dangerous idea to touch in this timeline but she can’t let it go. 

“I’m so sorry,” she wails, trying to avoid looking at his heartbroken expression for too long. “I know, I said we can’t do this, I just-”

“Julie.”

“Did you want me to find you?”

Air puffs from his mouth in a harsh sigh as he takes a few steps closer to her; incredulously focused on the fact that she’s there, in front of him, real. “I- Of course, of course I did, Julie. I just didn’t think you’d come. But I wanted you to know I was looking.”

Her eyelids fall shut. More tears are pushed out, and she doesn’t know if she’s crying or laughing because of course Luke would look even when she told him not to. He respected her, and he respected her wishes, but he could never help himself from pushing the boundaries. 

Achingly, she’s always been so grateful for that trait in him. 

But now the two of them are awkwardly standing only a few feet away, and the urge to just feel him, assure that he’s solid in front of her is becoming all too real. 

Gravel rolls under the soles of her shoes. “I loved the book,” she confesses. “All of the stories. I mean, I’m sorry about the- About your splits-”

“I shouldn’t have even tried with them-”

“But everything else, just…”

How does she say it?

“When- Back when, in the other timeline, and you guys were ghosts… Those stories were the kind of thing you had always wanted. You were so determined to get it, and-” She sniffles. “I’m so glad you got it.”

His lips turn downward. It’s a flash of the familiarly frustrated Luke who is trying to make a tough decision, but in this case, she doesn’t know what that decision is. All she sees is the wince at her saying it was what he wanted, and how happy she was that he got it, and-

A conceited part of her contemplates if he’s about to correct her, tell her that life hasn’t been great, say that he would have rather had it differently; but he doesn’t want her to think her sacrifice was for nothing. 

Oh, God, please say he’s happy. She doesn’t think she could handle anything less. 

“It’s thanks to you,” he responds instead, gulping down any more that threatens to come up. “You saved me.” Beat. “Are- Are you happy? Is everything in this timeline okay?”

Well, in her head, not exactly. Of course she still had her dad and brother and Flynn, but Sunset Curve never stayed together, she erased Carrie’s entire existence, and everything felt just a little tilted on its axis. Julie felt like a stranger in a world of her own creation. 

She yearned for the days back in Wonderland where everyone belonged. They were a little scarred and a little broken, but they were home. Her house from the original 2020 timeline was her home. Luke was her home, and he was right in front of her; the only security blanket she has right now. 

Once again, she finds herself bursting into tears and wanting so badly to reach out to him, to give him a hug and tell him she wishes that she stayed in bed in Wonderland with him forever. She wants to jump back down the black hole and go back to 1995 when things made more sense than they did now and Luke could be hers again; and not a distant love that could never materialize in the present. 

Julie, miraculously, holds herself back. But watching Luke’s hands flinch at the sight of her crying doesn’t make things easier. 

“Please don’t cry.” His voice is a whisper but the words hit with a force that almost buckles her knees. “Julie, please, take a deep breath.”

She takes in a breath that makes her lungs expand into her ribs. “I’m happy,” she lies through her teeth as she breathes out slowly. “I’m happy. We’re happy.”

“Good.” 

Tears are running down his face. She recalls a time where it was easy for her to hold his face and swipe under his eyes with her thumbs until there were no more tears for her to kiss away. 

In unison, they clear their throats and shift their eyes. The air changes; they know they’re in a public place again, and Luke is an adult musician, and he’s with a fan. He holds his hand up, the one that has the book, and shakes it a little back and forth. 

“Flynn said you wanted this signed?”

A watery smile blooms on her face in spite of the bitter moment. “Yeah,” she nods. “Thought it could be another memento.”

To put emphasis on the idea, she lifts up onto her tiptoes and tilts her voice up. Make it a more positive moment. Don’t dwell. Stop crying. 

You can’t change things now. 

Luke pops the cap off with his teeth, and toys around with it in his mouth like it’s one of his marked-up guitar picks as he holds the book open and scribbles something (probably illegible) on the inside of the front cover. 

Then, once he’s done there, he starts flipping the pages around like he knows where every detail of the story is and marks up certain pages with… Something. She doesn’t know. After he’s made his wanted notes, he writes something out on the last page before firmly shutting it and returning it to her possession. 

“Thank you,” she smiles simply as she pulls the book from his hands and carefully assures that their hands don’t overlap. If she touches him, she falls apart. 

Luke hums in response. 

Stupidly, Julie decides that moment to open up the book and see what he wrote while he’s standing right in front of her. But she isn’t thinking about him, or looking at him -- she’s looking at the inside cover. 

We were always meant to find each other. Don’t forget that - please. 

Yours,

Luke

When a tear drops on the page, she quickly turns farther into the book because she doesn’t want her feelings to ruin his beautiful, even if messy, words. These words are all she’ll have after today. 

The few pages in the book that he made notes on were just little things that she never knew she needed to hear. 

The chapter about his first sold out stadium show? Thought of you the whole time

When he heard he was nominated for a Grammy? Wanted to call you first

The night he won his first Grammy? Almost thanked you in my speech

The last page he wrote on was the Acknowledgements page. Unsurprisingly, it wasn’t that long. Luke kept a core circle of people and that was that. But below that short list, in bold, black letters:

To Julie Molina, who sacrificed everything so that I could be able to tell these stories. I wish she could have been a part of them. 

Her tears slip from her face so clear and quickly that she’s surprised her tear ducts are generating such a mass amount. The words replay in her head, in Luke’s voice, over and over. The affirmation that he wanted her with him all this time. 

But she had to go again. This had to be a one-time thing. This hurt too much for her to put either of them through it again, and besides -- now she had closure in his own writing; with her tears notarizing each word. 

“It’s time, Julie,” she mutters to herself. “It’s time.”

To say goodbye. Again. 

But Luke never answers. It’s dead silent, even though cars should be racing on the road behind them. When she looks up, Luke is frozen to the spot. Everything is, except her. 

“Time is a funny thing isn’t it? Just when you think you have a handle on it, it manages to surprise you.” 

It’s Willie, but not actually Willie. The one who was giving her the clues and trying to lead her in directions all over 1995; the one who she hasn’t seen in a really, really long time. For a moment, she doesn’t believe it. 

But he tells her that fate is in her hands. This is her choice. And despite the doubt that lingers uneasily in her chest, she can’t help but be desperate for this to be real. 

“Why not you? Who better than Julie Molina? Teenage girl with a good heart and music in her soul. Braver than most. Why not you?” 

Julie jumped across time to save her boys, and now she is willing to make the trip again if it means there’s a chance of saving them all. 

But there’s one more thing she wants to do. Just before everything either is perfect again or goes to complete shit. 

Spinning away from Willie, she takes a second glance at Luke’s still frame and softens her face into a smile. He had been looking down at her while she was reading his notes with tears in his eyes and a sad grin on his face. 

No one is looking or judging anymore -- so she stands on her toes and throws her arms around his neck, squeezing him close even if he can’t hug her back. She’s been dying to do this since she saw him in the bookstore. 

And it feels like coming home. 

“I’ll find you again,” she whispers into his ear that probably isn’t listening. “I promise.”

And without any more hesitation, she turns back to Willie with her chin up and shoulders back. 

“What do I have to do?”

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The book never finds its way back to her the way that the bear does or the way that the ring does. 

But that’s okay, because the bookstore does, and she’s with Luke when she registers that they are walking by the bookstore on their way to meet everyone at one of their favorite diners. 

By now, Luke had been told everything. She felt herself starting to fall in love with this third Luke just as she had all the others, but could never tell if he was falling back in love with her. Julie found herself -- while this timeline was infinitely better than the old one -- pining for Luke to come back to her and love her like he did in two other lifetimes. 

Their hands were brushing each other’s on the sidewalk when the bookstore sign met her eyes. 

“Jules?” 

Her feet are glued to the cement; her eyes are glued to the alleyway. Luke approaches behind her and lays a hesitant hand on her shoulder. 

“Jules, are you- Is everything okay?”

“Can we take a detour, really quick?”

And suddenly, he’s letting her lace her fingers through his and pull him through traffic -- no crosswalk in sight -- across the street to stand in front of a bookstore that has zero meaning to him whatsoever. Julie selfishly revels in his calluses rubbing her knuckles and doesn’t make a move to let go unless he will. 

He doesn’t. At least, until they hit the alleyway.

“Julie, what is this place? Why are we out here? Is this… Did I like it here, or something?”

They never spoke much about the Luke’s of other timelines. Julie quickly caught onto the fact that he got uncomfortable when she talked about guys with his name and face that he knew virtually nothing about even though he felt pressured to know everything. 

But he dealt with her when she had moments like these. She never thanked him properly for it.

“It wasn’t like that,” she shakes her head, “we were here in the other 2020. The one where you were older, and this huge Grammy-winning solo musician. The one that was a result of what I did in 1995.”

The exit door is still rusty on the hinges. The brick is the same shade of red, and-

“Okay… And? What did you guys do?”

His use of third person is a clear message. “Him and I had made this promise in ‘95 that we wouldn't find each other, right?” “Because he would be old.”

“Yeah. But he published this book and had a whole signing tour called Find Me, and Flynn told me we should go, and… Basically, I had a mental breakdown at seeing him, and then he came back here and signed the book for me, and we talked, and-”

Her voice cracks. Her eyes feel wet. 

Fuck. 

Can’t she make it one timeline without sobbing in an alleyway?

A familiar hand rubs up and down her back as she stares, firmly, at the spot where her and Luke were so vividly standing and talking and pining for the other. 

“Jules, hey, look at me.” 

Because it’s Luke -- because it’s her Luke -- she listens to him, and rotates to face him. The soft fabric of his shirt hits her cheeks as he presses his fingers into the cotton and lifts his hand to wipe the tears from her face in a gesture that tempts her to cry more. Instead, she tries to laugh it off. “God, I really need to stop having meltdowns in alleyways, huh?” He stays quiet; looking at her in a recognizable Luke way that reminds her of all of their loving times in other lives. But she can’t get her hopes up. “I’m sorry. I know you don’t like when I talk about it. Sometimes I just-”

“You need to,” he nods. “I get it.”

Her feet are planted identically where they were in alternate-2020. But Luke is in a different spot, because this is a new Luke. One that’s right in front of her, lightly holding her arms; not one that’s a few feet out of reach. 

“He told me that we would always find each other.” Her voice is watered down, and quiet, but Luke is close enough to hear it. 

“Well, he was right, wasn’t he? We did it. For like, the fourth time, according to you.”

And then, she’s hit with a Luke Patterson smile. She sees it all of the time now but it never gets old because he’s young, and he’s happy, and he’s here. 

Her lips turn up to reflect it, and in a shocking turn of events: Luke instigates the hug. 

They are nearly best friends, so they’ve hugged before. But this one is different. 

His arms fold around her shoulders and tug her close and snug into his chest so that his chin is nearly resting on her hair. This leaves her able to press him close to her with her arms wrapped tightly and lovingly around his waist -- almost, dare she say it, like he was a teddy bear. 

“I never said I’m sorry,” he murmurs into her forehead. “Or thank you, for that matter.” “For what?” “I’m sorry you went through so much for me. For us. It still affects you a lot and I’m sorry you have to carry that alone.” His chest rises and falls under her cheek as he takes a deep breath, and she doesn’t think she’ll ever get tired of feeling him breathe or hearing his heartbeat. “And thank you for loving us enough to do it. You sacrificed a lot.”

She is too choked up to verbally comment -- but she squeezes him tighter, almost tempting her arms to swish through him. 

They don’t. 

And Luke continues talking after a moment of a peaceful silence. “It’s kind of cool, though, for me to think about this person I have in the universe. You know? The whole thing with us finding each other. I always have you, no matter where I am. You’ll be out there.”

“Always,” she sighs into his chest, because she can’t help it. It took them a few tries, but here they are: In the same timeline, with full family and friends and lives, in a reciprocated hug. 

“Always.” Luke repeats the word, almost feeling it out in his mouth. “Well, thanks for doing it again. Maybe let me do the work next time. You need a break.”

God, this Luke is always so good at making her laugh. Ghost-Luke was, too, but the other Luke’s and her were always swept up in emotionally-taxing situations for her to be laughing like she could when she was with this Luke. 

It was almost as if this one had practice. Maybe those other lives were kicking in.

He was her final Luke, hopefully. 

As she props her chin up on his chest, she gives him the widest grin she’s worn all day. “I would appreciate that. Just don’t take too long.” Her forehead nuzzles itself into his neck as she settles herself back into his arms; fully content to be wrapped up in him for as long as he will let her stay. “I’ll get worried.”

A soothing hand over her hair is all the confirmation she needs. 

“Don’t worry, Boss. I’ll be there.”

[jiminiediminie]

A not-at-all brief commentary on BE-hind story interview.

We really got over an hour of BTS just talking about their music. They really told the media yall don’t ask the right questions so let me do it for you. Love that for them. 

But honestly I am so happy that they decided to do this. Because most of the time interviewers don’t ask the right questions or it is in a situation where they have time constraints. Or the interviewer never even listened to the album in the first place (think james corden saying his favorite track on be is dynamite probs because it seemed like that was the only one he knew).

I appreciate as well that it is the members interviewing each other. They could have just as easily sat each member in a room and asked them the questions off screen. But they didn't. I think that adds such a personal element to the interview. Bts members likely know about each other’s music (even solo music) better than anyone else. So who better to talk with the members about their music than each other? 

Running commentary of each interview below the cut. 

JK interviews Jin

Blonde jk for the win

I lost count of how many times they shook hands please they are so annoying 

Jin please don’t downplay your talents. That hurt my heart. If I could describe his voice in one word it would have been powerful. I hope that jin got to see all the praise after the fix you cover. Because he killed it in that. 

I loved getting to hear the behind the scene of jin’s role in stay; I didn’t know his role in it before he talked about it.

I’m glad jin got to release abyss and put so much of his own work into it. It is also so amazing to hear how much help joon is to all of the members when it comes to lyrics and music. A talented king. 

Slightly surprised there wasn't more clowning around in their interview since these two are usually so chaotic together. I thought jk would clown jin when they started talking about jin being older but he didn't. Growth. 

Hobi interviews JK

Hobi looks so soft in that cardigan 

Hobi right off the bat asking about the mixtape. He knows what we want. 

Jk talking about how he wants to try writing songs not just about his own experiences was so interesting to hear; can’t wait to see what he comes up with in the future. 

Him talking about all the different things he wants to try but it’s almost too many was very relatable. That feeling of having so many choices you don't know where to start. But that does mean that when we do get a mixtape from him it will be from varying styles of music and i am all here for that. Personally holding out for rocker jk or acoustic jk. 

His favorite song to sing is euphoria; that’s so sweet it is such a gem of a song. I think I would have chosen still with you since it’s pretty different than a lot of the other songs he sings.

Hobi saying “you’re all grown up” to jk and jk saying “i'm not the old me” really hit me in the feels. Hobi and bts really did watch jk grow from a slightly awkward pre-teen to the confident man he is today. They must feel so proud of him. 23 yo jk is not a baby of bts anymore. He does what he wants. He wears what wants. He has long hair and dyes it blonde then blue just because he can. He even talked about how his voice has matured. Im glad that the members see that too and seem to be proud of the person he has became. 

3 main tracks. 3 mv. 3 choreos of different styles. Yes do it jk please im begging. After seeing him dance in black swan at mma i want to see more contemporary dancing from him. And i feel like after getting still with you and stay he can write songs that would fit that vibe. I just want to see jk’s dance talent showcased more. 

I don’t know if the fans could survive 3 separate jk mv. We barely survived a live performance of my time. 

Tae interviews Hobi

Tae in that emerald green sweater. He looks so good. He should wear that color more

I love how serious tae is about playing the interviewer. The actor in him never sleeps. 

Hobi talking about the dual meanings behind the title of Dis-ease was so cool. Fans obviously caught that it could mean multiple things. But as far as i know that was never confirmed. Now that it is I am once again impressed with the thought they put behind everything they do. 

A psychological occupational disease. Your mind hobi 

I think it’s so cool that hobi recorded it by himself and how he said that doing it like that allows him to grow as a producer since he has to listen and edit himself. They really just always continue to grow in their roles in music don’t they? 

Hobi talking about how he would love to solve his own problems but then remembering that he is part of a team really shows how much they trust and rely on each other. So he and jimin worked on the melody of the bridge together and then joon wrote the lyrics. And now we have the most iconic bridge of all time. Still holding out for a dis-ease live performance or music video (I’m a clown I know). 

And lol at tae being like call me next time dude 

“I would like to share my music with everyone” -- please do

Please tae is so sweet and attentive!? “When you talked about music i noticed you had a smile on your face and i thought ‘he really loves music’”. “But personally if i had your skills I’d be showing off and be proud of myself”. Kim taehyung is the embodiment of a teddy bear 

And closing it with actor tae again -- “can i get your autograph” 

Jin interviews Jimin

Two seconds into the interview they are clowning each other with jin saying to talk informally. Yet as soon as jm did (and that slight smile when he did), jin is like I was talking to myself. Chaotic as expected of these two. 

Jm talking about his process for music being “just go as i feel” makes so much sense for him. He is an easy going person and it makes sense that it reflects in his work style. 

It’s so cool that him coming up with the melody of the dis-ease bridge was just because he was humming to himself and the producer liked it -- almost serendipitous if you will  

I love when people praise jimin for his vocals. So hearing him talk about how they used his vocal in place of a female for lgo’s chorus stroked my jm bias ego

Joon is seriously the best human ever. Jimin didn’t want to bother the other members to help with christmas love but joon contacted him and helped with the lyrics anyway. Bts seriously has the most amazing leader. 

“I’d like to try making an acoustic style song”. Please do it jimin. Acoustic bts is my weakness but especially acoustic jimin. Songs like promise sound so good with his singing style.

Jin shaking jimin’s pinky 😂

“I’m a little disappointed in the MC” ���but you know if you looked around there is no MC like me” -- jinmin’s relationship everybody 

Jimin interviews Joon

Minimoni look so cozy in their sweatshirts sitting on a plush rug. 

“You know we have this youngest member”. “Oh jungkook?” “No the real youngest” “Oh seokjin. That’s a shame” -- please minimoni are so funny and joon knew immediately who jm was talking about when he said the real youngest. 

“It felt like I was doing the only thing i could do” . Please let me give you a hug joon

Joon’s mind continues to amaze me. How he talked about needing the concept or key word to give “flesh” to the song was such a good way to explain how he approaches music. 

“What do you mean little? You play a very big role” -- lol jimin speaking facts. I already mentioned how amazing it is that he helped jimin and jin with their individual songs. The fact that members who want help with their own music always seem to go to joon really tells you how much of an amazing and talented human being kim namjoon is. I can’t remember the context, but there was this moment that jimin (or was it hobi?) said something like “what would we do if we didn't have rm”. They are truly lucky to have him. 

Release that minimoni subunit now please and thank you 

Tell us what you’re working on joon don't be shy. Joon mentioned that his music is like a diary. I would love to know his thoughts expressed in music now. 2018 joon who made mono and 2021 joon are two very different people. Bts has grown so much since then. 

Joon interviews Yoongi

The work colleagues! Did you know they have worked together for 10 years? 

Yoongi’s fuzzy sweater. So soft

Yoongi saying he writes songs when he is bored. Lol i love him so much

It’s really interesting to hear them talk about their lyrics getting rejected. I guess we don’t hear much about that part. And lol at joon just laughing and saying he guesses he didn’t grasp tae’s intentions for b&g. 

I like that this was more of a conversation than an interview. I love it when these two just sit together and talk about technical stuff that i don’t understand (like the festa interview)

Yoongi is such a good person to make music with. JK wanted to add humming to telepathy? They added humming to telepathy. I had wondered the reason why there are two different versions of the song. I prefer the longer one tbh

Yoongi wants to make an acoustic song? Hell yeah. Jimin does too. So yoongi x jimin subunit acoustic song with yoongi playing the guitar (please). Also a folk song?? Yoongi your taste i like it

I can’t wait to hear yoongi sing im so excited for him

Yoongi talking about how they made this album with no pressure and got to just do what they wanted and that it was received so well. How he wants to keep making music like that. That makes me happy. I want them to continue to get to do that. I love the big productions and concepts of their albums. But if they are happier making albums like be that do not have that then that is what i want them to do. 

“Please listen to telepathy a lot” -- what yoongi wants yoongi gets. Go stream telepathy 

Yoongi interviews Tae

The title of blue and grey is because tae wants to overcome that feeling. My heart. 

He looked so shy talking blue and grey. I am so excited to see him get to talk about kth1 when it comes out. I could listen to him for hours. 

English guide track? Release it tae

“I felt kind of proud of myself” -- you should tae 

Yoongi straight up asking tae why he didn't include joon’s lyrics was interesting. It’s cool to know that tae had the kind of power to choose what he felt would fit the emotion of the song.

It doesn’t surprise me that tae feels so much pressure to make sure the tape is good before it is released. It seems like when it comes to solo work the members really do feel more pressure since they aren't sharing the burden with the others. 

“Please look forward to it” -- don’t worry tae everyone is

We know from the preview that there are 13 songs potentially on the mixtape. That would be so amazing if he released it with so many songs. Tae’s voice sounds so good in so many different styles so i know that it would be so varied.

Final thoughts -- I love that they got to do this. I hope going forward they do this more for their albums. And from what the members said they enjoyed getting to be so involved in the process of making the album. It would be amazing if that continued. While a lot of their hit songs are not made fully by the members, those songs that are often have more meaning to the fans. b&g, stay, telepathy. These were songs from the members. We got to hear their actual thoughts put into these songs. I hope that bh sees how well this album did and lets that continue.

Congrats if you made it to the end! 

[acklesforlife]

Happy Birthday Danneel Ackles!

It’s Danneel Ackles’ birthday, so we thought for our continuing celebration of Supernatural Spring Break week, this was a good time to both wish her a happy birthday and share the rather amusing story of one of our first times meeting her.

There have been a few memorable times since, including the party celebrating ‘Supernatural Day’ in Austin with Mayor Adler, which was just plain fun and an opportunity for some real conversation.

And I’ll be forever touched that Danneel wanted a copy of Family Don’t End With Blood (and how incredulous she was that Jensen actually had a chapter in it!) and that she has read our other books too.

The actual first time we met Danneel was a long time ago – at the after party following the premiere of indie movie Ten Inch Hero, which was at a club in LA back in, I think 2008. We all left the premiere and walked over to the club, invited by director David Mackay – the cast and the audience all together.

We had a lovely little chat with Danneel there about the film, met screenwriter Betsy Morris who’s still a friend today, and asked actor Matt Barr (now of Walker) to watch the rest room door while I in desperation used the men’s room because there was a huge line at the women’s. (He was lovely about it and it makes me laugh now every time I see him as Hoyt).

It was a momentous party, what can I say?  After that, my co-author Kathy and I interviewed David over a three hour brunch in Vancouver for the first book we were working on, and mentioned that we’d love to chat with Danneel  too. To be honest, we didn’t really think that would happen. But a few months later, while we were in LA for the Supernatural convention, we got a call from David.

I’ll let some excerpts from our second book, Fangasm! Supernatural Fangirls, take it from here…

… he let us know that Danneel Harris had actually agreed to an interview too. This prompted some hyperventilating and a rush of euphoria that left us grinning like fools. Jensen Ackles’s girlfriend was going to meet with us? Really? David had given Lynn’s cell phone number to Danneel so that she could call us tomorrow, the same day the boys came back to town. SWEET.

Given the pattern of the weekend so far—great things happening and then going horribly wrong—we should have known what was coming.

[On the Sunday of the convention, while everyone was in a fever pitch of excitement over Jared and Jensen being there] Lynn was obsessively checking her phone. “Noooo!!” she gasped. It was the plaintive moan of a beast in distress.

Kathy assumed that Lynn was passing a gallstone from the sound of it.

“No reception!” Lynn said, wide-eyed.

For Kathy, who hates phones (really, what doesn’t Kathy hate?) this didn’t seem like a big deal. The world really is too connected anyway. An hour out of cell phone reception seemed like a welcome respite, an opportunity just to enjoy the moment.

Lynn wasn’t as philosophical. “What if Danneel calls?”

Kathy honestly didn’t hold out much hope that this would actually happen—a yellow on the threat scale at most—so she wasn’t concerned.

Lynn was taking up her slack by flailing around, banging buttons on her phone as if somehow this would jolt it into action. “How can there be no cell phone reception in LA??”

Lynn had a point. We’re reasonably certain that there is cell phone reception in the Arctic Circle, but there was not a bar to be had in a hotel in LA. LA!! The town where everyone’s people are calling everyone else’s people, where iPhones are accessorized to coordinate with the day’s outfits, where a missed call can ruin a career. Jared and Jensen distracted Lynn for the duration of their time onstage, but as soon as it was over Lynn made a bee line for Jared’s girlfriend, Sandy (the woman sitting in front, wearing a hoodie so no one would recognize her—except Lynn apparently). Lynn wildly explained our dilemma to the stunned and probably scared actress. It was a good thing the Men With No Necks (MWNN) were only being paid to guard “the boys” or Lynn would have been face down on the carpet.

While Lynn was doing this, Kathy was pretending that she did not know Lynn.

Sandy was sympathetic, but didn’t know if she’d even see Danneel. Lynn thanked her for the sympathy and moved on to the next person who might be able to help. She attempted to enlist convention photographer Lizz, to no avail, and finally Creation owner Adam.

“I’ll try Lynn,” he said, sounding slightly exasperated. “But I’m kinda running an entire convention here.”

Thwarted again, Lynn pulled out all the stops. During her Jensen photo op, she stopped everything to explain the situation to Jensen himself.

“Hi, Jensen,” Lynn said, hoping that her voice wasn’t sounding too shaky. “We have an interview set up with Danneel today for the book we’re writing on fandom, and she’s supposed to call us, but I don’t have any reception on my phone, so I’m afraid she won’t be able to.”

The photo-op process screeched to a halt, and the room fell silent. Photo ops, you see, are not a place for conversation. They are highly valued by fans, who pay top dollar for the privilege of standing next to a celebrity, and they are relentlessly organized. The entire experience lasts about twenty seconds, and during that time you’re expected to say hello to the celebrity, smile, perhaps get an arm around your back or lean into said celebrity’s very firm bicep, and then move the hell out of the way and let the next person crowd in for the next picture. The photo ops allow no room for deviation. So when deviation happens, no one is very happy. The photographer wasn’t happy. The other fans weren’t happy. And the MWNN looked ready to move into swift and potentially lethal action.

Not that any of this stopped Lynn. “Can you put us in touch with her?” she continued, oblivious to the threatening stares all around her.

“Oh right, the interview,” Jensen said.

Lynn just nodded, though inside she was stuck on “OMG Jensen knows about our interview and our book, ohmygodohmygod.”

“Maybe she can email you,” Jensen continued. Then the conversation abruptly ended as Lynn was grabbed unceremoniously by the back of the neck and “escorted” from the photo-op room. Uh oh. She hadn’t experienced that feeling since being a two-year-old caught trying to get away with her baby brother’s coveted teddy bear. Lynn was most definitely in trouble—and even worse, she’d made no progress in getting in touch with Danneel, who didn’t even have our email address!

Lynn, ever the intrepid researcher, was not deterred. She thanked the Man with No Neck for his assistance and got right back in line for her next photo op, the “sandwich” photo (as in sandwiched between Jared and Jensen, which is vaguely dirty and thus very popular). As Lynn walked up, Jensen immediately tried to continue their conversation.

“So do you want to . . .” he began, while Jared looked confused. After all, the celebrities know the no talking rule as well as the fans.

Lynn held up a hand defensively. “Shh, I’m not talking to you. I totally got in trouble for it before,” she added, as the MWNN hovered threateningly.

Jensen laughed. “I got in trouble too,” he protested.

We doubt the MWNN were involved.

“Can Danneel get us her email?” Lynn managed as she was once again “encouraged” to leave the room as quickly as possible.

There was no time for an answer. Damn. Thwarted again. We were disappointed, but Lynn was relieved that she wasn’t escorted out of the entire con (the specter of the Flying Fangirl from Asylum still looms large at these events after all). We were still feeling like an interview with Danneel had been too good to be true anyway, so we tried to swallow our sadness and settled in to watch some of the other guests. Midway through the next panel, Lizz the photographer came out into the audience and passed us a note—from Danneel. It just said, “Send me an email, love danneel” and included her email address. Being a bit clueless about the popularity of smartphones in 2008, we figured this meant that she wanted us to get in touch with her later for an email interview. We were disappointed that we wouldn’t get to talk to her in person but incredibly excited that she’d given us her email address. We wandered back outside after the panel and tried not to be too miserable about the Danneel interview not happening that day. We were hanging out in the hallway chatting when photographer Lizz suddenly appeared and yanked us away in the middle of a sentence with an exasperated, “Come with me!” She led us down a small side hall.

We still weren’t entirely sure what was going on. Were we in trouble again? Had the MWNN decided to kick us out after all? Moments later, Danneel emerged from the side door, introducing herself with a smile. Somehow we managed to compose ourselves and smile back. Apparently Jensen had facilitated the interview after all! Danneel suggested that we all grab some coffee, so we headed upstairs to the hotel’s Starbucks, where Danneel insisted on treating.

Coffee in hand, we went back downstairs to start the interview. Danneel suggested that we go backstage to talk, and then came a weirdly symbolic moment. The very same Man with No Neck who had tossed Lynn unceremoniously out of the photo op for daring to speak to the talent now held back the curtain to the backstage area, solicitously helped Danneel and us step over the various wires and cables snaking across the floor, then closed the curtain behind us to seal our crossover. The irony wasn’t lost on us.

Kathy whipped out her trusty voice recorder just as she had done for every other interview we’ve conducted, turned it on, and . . . nothing. We were interviewing Jensen Ackles’s girlfriend and there was NOTHING. It wasn’t the batteries, which had been checked and rechecked. Kathy tried to maintain some semblance of professionalism. She would quietly figure out what was wrong and then she would just as quietly fix it. Deep breaths. Okay, the recorder was FULL. Not to worry. She excused herself, leaving a confused Lynn to entertain Danneel.

First the cell phone, now the voice recorder. Sunday turned out to be the day technology failed us. This, for Lynn, is an everyday occurrence. For Kathy not so much. She loves technology. She embraced the Internet years before it got pretty, she used a “portable” PC to write her doctoral dissertation (portability is of course a relative designation—relative to muscle mass and stamina), and she gets gleeful over the prospect of using every new toy her university has to offer. So yes, technology was her friend. Until it wasn’t.

While Kathy dashed upstairs to grab her laptop (wishing that she could grab a shot of tequila), Lynn attempted to keep up a conversation with Danneel without actually asking any of our carefully prepared interview questions. Without a recorder, there was no way she’d remember a damn thing that was said—so that left small talk as the only option. Luckily, Danneel and Lynn connected over their mutual love of writing, swapped college stories, and then Lynn (as always) managed to talk about her children. Danneel proved herself a great listener. Minutes went by—lots of them—and Lynn realized to her horror that Jensen and Jared were almost done with their autographs. After that, it was off to the airport—and we would lose our interviewee to her boyfriend as she left with Ackles. Where was Kathy???

Finally, shortly before Lynn had moved on to telling Danneel about her daughter’s first steps, Kathy returned and hurriedly tried to download everything onto the laptop while time quickly ran out. Come on!! All Kathy could focus on was how long it was taking for everything to download. That and the rising nausea that threatened to overtake her. Lynn, in desperation, started asking the interview questions (which, since they weren’t recorded, are lost to posterity—and to this book).

Suddenly Jared Padalecki walked by, meaning that autographs were over and people were getting ready to leave. We despaired of a recorded interview, heartbroken over the squandered opportunity. And then, quite unexpectedly, Jensen Ackles was standing there, smiling and saying hello. Even more improbably, he held a fluffy white dog in his arms. For a moment, Kathy was sure this was all part of the nightmare, because fandom at the time had no clue that Jensen even owned a dog. Icarus, however, was quite real—and quite fluffy. Icarus was almost as excited to see Jensen as we were—he’d apparently been whining backstage every time he heard his owner’s voice during the Q&A. We hugged Icarus while Jensen hugged Danneel and tried to talk her into riding with him to the airport. All Kathy heard in those words were that it was too late—she’d blown it.

Danneel, however, had other ideas. She blew Jensen off. No wait. This part can’t really be happening either. More of that dream? Kathy was contemplating poking herself with a sharp object, sticking her finger in a wall socket, anything to jar herself back into reality. This was surely just her own anxiety-ridden psyche toying with her. Must be. Who says goodbye to Jensen Ackles so that she can talk to US?? But Danneel really was excusing herself to say good-bye to Jensen, Icarus happily following, with assurances to us that she’d be right back to finish the interview. Kathy gathered together the few shreds of sanity she still had, sorted the problem, and figured out how to record directly onto the laptop.

Danneel returned, true to her word, and the interview finally began. We relocated to the “green room,” the cloistered room where the guests are confined between stage appearances. The green room, as we were well aware, is a private space—more or less a “No Fans Allowed” clubhouse for the celebrities. We immediately felt like imposters, occupying a space where we clearly shouldn’t be. The room offered a small banquet of food, a bit of which we gratefully sampled, and a table stacked full of fans’ gifts for “the boys.” The coolest of these was a hairdryer that looked exactly like Dean Winchester’s favorite gun—and yes, it actually worked!

Danneel, of course, was quite comfortable in the green room and turned out to be very good at making us comfortable as well. Lynn asked questions. Danneel answered. Kathy breathed. Everything was going to work out just fine. Somewhere the unicorns of fandom were neighing happily.

And then the laptop went dead.

Kathy again tried to be unobtrusive as she flailed around trying to find an outlet. No point in making a bigger fool of herself, right? Sooner or later, though, it became apparent that she was in need of assistance and everyone, including Danneel, was up and scouting for an outlet, crawling under tables and moving furniture to do so. Danneel, we decided, had the patience of a saint. She never lost her sense of humor either, shrugging off our apology for keeping her from accompanying Jensen to the airport by wryly noting that “Jared would have been in the limo anyway, it’s not like we could have made out on the way to the airport” and jumping up to knock on wood when we asked her about the possibility of marriage.

In the midst of all the sitcom mishaps we did manage to carry on an interview…

You can read the rest of our misadventures (and the interview itself) with Danneel in the book, but Kathy and I left that day with a respect and affection for Danneel that has never faded.

Jensen posted a photo of her plunging a clogged toilet today for her birthday, and I laughed because it makes it clear that she’s still as genuine as she was that day she got down on the floor and crawled around looking for an outlet right along with us.

I’ve had the opportunity to chat with Danneel several times since our hilarious interview, and I think most people who have run into her at the brewery would say this too – she’s not afraid to be real.

I’m so glad Danneel was able to be part of Supernatural as a cast member before it ended, but really she’s always been part of the SPN Family. Happy birthday, Danneel – thanks for keeping it real!

–Lynn

Source: [x]

[sokkisky]

~baby or no baby, you’re still mine~

Want to make a request?: https://forms.gle/NyZgUcqkCPzHRvVn6

Want a short quick post?: https://sokkisky.tumblr.com/ask 

Rating: SFW (Comfort) 

Pairings: Bakugou x Infertile Y/N 

Warnings: Infertility 

A/N: Today’s request was very interesting to me and Bakugou comfort is something I still am trying to work on. The request goes like this. 

Y/n finds out they cant have kids and has to break it to Bakugo when they have been trying for a little while. And Y/N ends up having a hard time with depression afterwards... You dont have too do this. I just found this out myself and honestly Bakugo is just my comfort character... if you do write it thank you from the bottom of my heart.

And I’m very glad to write this for you. I’m sorry you’re struggling through this and I hope this helps in any way. <3 The ending is slightly split so if you want a little extra added ending, it’s right there for you! As always remember to take care of yourselves and be kind to yourselves. I love you all so much. 

Negative. 

You sat on the rim of the bathroom tub, holding the pregnancy test in your hand. You teared up seeing the results. Negative. Again. It didn’t matter how much you tried, the tests always came back negative. Your eyes welled with tears, sinking to the floor and clutching the test in your hand. “One more try, just one more.” you said quietly to yourself, gritting your teeth trying to hold back the tears. 

Even though this would be the twelfth try that  you said ‘One more try’.

Bakugou opened the door, walking in and sitting next to you. He looked over at the test in your hand, his face dropping. He didn’t say anything, he just pulled you close. “We can try again, sometimes things like this take time.” he said softly, his tone somewhat gruff as he spoke to comfort you. You nodded, sniffling a bit. 

“We could always get medical assistance.” you said softly. He looked into your eyes, the white turning a light pink from your crying. He held your face, swiping away tears with his thumb. “Of course teddy bear.” 

~~~

“You’re infertile.” 

You almost didn’t hear the doctor’s words. Bakugou slammed his hand on the bed, “You’re wrong check the paper again.” The doctor sighed, looking over his clipboard. “I assure you I’m correct Sir. You’re wife here is infertile.” he said calmly, adjusting his glasses. 

Bakugou balled his fists a bit, glaring at him. You noticed taking his arm in your hands. “Suki” you said softly. You felt his tensed body somewhat relax but he didn’t look at you, he just glared at the doctor. 

“I’m so sorry ma’am” the doctor said wearily, turning his gaze to you as you sat on the patient cot. “But there’s nothing I can do.” Bakugou sneered, his teeth gritting in anger, “What do you mean there’s nothing you can do? You’re a damn doctor aren’t you?” You looked up to his anger filled face. His eyes, however, looked sad. You knew he just wanted someone to blame, someone to put the problem on. 

But inside you knew it was your fault. 

You knew you could never give Bakugou a family because you were infertile. He used to talk for ages about having his own little rascals running around but now, 

Now that seemed impossible. 

You racked your brain trying to come up with a solution. “What about a surrogate? Or maybe we could try something else I-” the doctor held his hand up. Shaking his head. He placed a soft palm on your shoulder. “Your body isn’t suited to bear, or create offspring.” he said gently, his eyes saddening from the look in yours. 

Bakugou slapped his hand away grabbing yours, his strong tight grip enveloping your fingers. “Your body will be suited for my fist if you don’t shut your mouth!” he said before storming out, you followed behind, the tears running down your cheek. 

~~~

You sat in the bathroom, the door closed sobbing against it. You felt yourself bottle yourself up, bringing your knees to your chest. Bakugou went to his office as soon as the two of you got home. 

You knew he was as hurt as you, maybe even more. This was what he wanted for a long time, kids of his own that is. You sobbed, feeling like less than yourself. You couldn’t do the one natural thing most could. You’d never thought you’d feel so sad, slumping yourself against the cold marble floors. You sobbed into your knees, your tears streaming down your legs, you wanted to be numb, to not feel a thing but you couldn’t. You were forced to deal with this, do deal with the situation. 

You felt alone all until you felt a push on the door. 

You lifted your head slightly as another push was felt against the door, like someone was trying to open it. “Move dumbass let me in.” a small voice said from the other side. Bakugou's voice sounded meak, small, like he was crumbling inside. The words alone would make you think he was angry, but he didn’t sound that way, he sounded pained. 

You slowly scooted away from the door and it swung open. Bakugou stood there, his eyes watery, welling with even more tears when his eyes landed on you. He shut the door, standing across from you for a second before kneeling in front of you. He sat down and parted his legs, pulling you close to his chest. “Don’t cry, there’s nothing to be sad about.” he said, his voice low. “Stop crying idiot…” his voice trailed, wavering unsteadily. “Baby or no baby, you’re still mine do you understand? It’s going to be okay.” he added, choking on tears. He coddled your head and body close to him, rubbing you gently. He kissed your forehead. “Please don’t cry anymore” he said, his voice crumbling under his emotions. 

The two of you held each other softly crying, in each other’s arms. You both knew that things couldn’t go as you wanted, it was impossible now, but somehow, just sitting there, holding each other, you felt better. Slightly a bit more calm. 

~~~

A few days passed and while the sadness still lingered in you, you felt that Bakugou had become a lot more open. He talked to you about how he was feeling a lot more, not being shy to pull you into his arms whenever he wanted you close. 

Whenever you’d work he would slide behind you and wrap you in his arms. Resting against you quietly as you worked. If you cooked he’d stand behind you, his head resting on your shoulder, leaving sweet kisses along your shoulders and back. He was very soft around you, always bringing you small treats or snacks. 

You sat in your bed, laptop on your lap as Bakugou walked in, holding a stack of papers. “Hey teddy bear?” he asked softly. You looked up, turning to him. 

“Do you want to adopt?” 

[wallwriterstuff]

Hi!What do you think about Demetri/Alec/Felix dating a hybrid?I mean, I had this idea since i read the last book but what if they found their mate when they went to check up on Joham?And one of his daughters is a redhead with unreal green eyes and shes even more beautiful than Heidi or Rosalie? Hybrids are more beautiful than vampires they say.Maybe has a gift too?I think this is an idea the entire fandom went over and i think its cool so if you want to, could u write some headcanons about it?

Hi hey hello! I definitely did enjoy writing these headcanons. Sorry they took a wee while but I hope you like! 

Alec: He will be aged up to the movie version in this since hybrids fully mature to look like adults 😊

This boy is insatiably curious

You fascinate him

You’ve been alive a while but your experience is so different to his, you’ve lived so differently under your father’s influence

Expect long nights telling him every detail of your existence, what it was like to grow up so fast with your sisters, with Joham, knowing your brother only through notes and the occasional visit

He has learned by now that you come as a package deal with your sisters, but this is something he understands. As he and Jane shared a womb, so shall they share a life

Constantly tries to get you to eat human food because oh my god you can eat it without gagging?             +  “And this?”                          “Alec I can eat human food, it just tastes like cardboard.”                    “Even this?”

The first time you sleep in his presence he has this awestruck expression. He’s not watched anyone sleep in all the time he’s been immortal and doesn’t remember what it was like to sleep himself. All those faces you make as you dream send his mind absolutely reeling because what are you thinking about? What do you dream of? Is it bizarre in your head? What he wouldn’t give to catch a mere glimpse of your dreams…

Jane is…difficult. She wants to like you, really she does, but the only other hybrid she knows belongs to the Cullen’s and that whole fiasco is a sore spot as a Volturi defeat in her mind (and no one defeats her coven)

The first time you get a small scrape Alec FreAkS out because oh god you’re bleeding the whole room is going to be after your sweet sweet blood and…and it’s too sweet…you, you really don’t smell all that appealing like a regular human, hell, Santiago’s not even noticed? What?

Always grumbles and complains your too hot when you cuddle (you’re a solid 40°C after all) but secretly loves your warmth. He’s been frozen for centuries and you’re his very own hot water bottle          + Does get a wee bit annoyed when you make him spoon with you later into the relationship because vampires aren’t be able to supposed to sweat but he SWEARS venom is leaking from every pore in his body because you make the bed an oven

15/10 from this boy, adores having a hybrid mate, you are the perfect snuggle buddy for him and just the right amount of human to make him feel like he’s doing a good job protecting you (even though you’re a hybrid and almost as strong as he is, it’s an old timey thing and he died a pubescent boy, let him feel like a man please)

Demetri:

Honestly? He forgets half of the time

“Absolutely not, I will not risk you coming hunting with me!”                “I need to hunt and I will not be letting you stop me, bloodhound.”

When they had first gone to find Joham Demetri had been more than curious, the differences in his mind between vampire and hybrid stark considering they’d almost caused a war with the Cullen’s

He replayed the trial over and over in his mind as he followed the strangely vibrant tenor straight to…his mate?

Excuse you?

It swings one way or the other for the initial getting to know period, either he’s treating your fragile ‘human’ self like glass or your ‘vampire’ self is being thrown against the nearest wall because the man has urges and you’re more than happy to satisfy them

You were mostly raised by your sister, living the nomadic life of a vampire with visits to your father now and then when he wanted to check on your development, so you pair spend long hours discussing all the places you’ve been and things you have seen                    + Since Demetri is far older he has lots more stories to tell so these evenings eventually turn into him telling stories while you end up in a variety of situations. Sometimes he’s holding you to him in bed while he waits for you to fall asleep, other times he lights the fire and you sit curled up together on the sofa before it. 

Your favourite Storytime setting by far is the window seat, where you can lean back against his chest and be blanketed by the diamonds his skin reflects in the sunset

You don’t really like human food all that much, but in an effort to woo you he spent all day watching videos and messing up recipes until he had perfected (if you count perfected as collapsing in on itself in places and a little bit raw in the middle) a chocolate cake to welcome you to Volterra for the first time

There was a little flour on his jaw still when he presented it to you and his eyes were all big

He had this smug little smile too

Too smug considering the state of the cake

You’ve been treated to baked goods ever since and Demetri has gotten rather good at his new hobby

110% watches you sleep but not for nefarious reasons. You talk in your sleep and Demetri has compiled a secret list of things you say for his eyes only            + His favourite so far is “Felix no, put that poor duck down.”                     + You didn’t remember where that had come from so it remains without context, and Demetri has made a myriad of stories each more outlandish than the next as to where that quote came from

Loves to lay his head on your chest and listen to your fast, fluttering heartbeat, you get bonus points if you play with his hair

Doesn’t even bother tracking you by tenor anymore, you radiate heat, he knows when you’re near because he gets warmer

You’re rather self-concious that you live among the Volturi without being gifted             + Demetri is always quick to remind you that your very nature is the most extraordinary gift in itself

Overall a very good match for a hybrid, you’re never bugged by endless questions like your sister is with Alec but you do need to remind him sometimes of your dual-species label, you need blood as much as you need sleep

Felix:

This character follows a specific idea of appearance stated in the request

Felix absolutely adores you, your perfect for him in every way!

Someone small and durable? Sign him up!

Your attitude is as fiery as your hair, which is a good thing because Felix needs someone as stubborn as he is

His head is as thick as his arms

The minute he sees you he’s completely under your spell which surprises only those closest to him – the mans a giant teddy bear as you now well know

Felix takes things nice and slow, he’s never been a fan of rushing into things when it comes to romance, and is very much intro traditional ways of wooing you                  + The first thing you receive is a simple letter, elegantly written in a large spidery hand. You were already smitten with the beefy man by the last line, the flowers that arrived a week later really weren’t necessary but very much appreciated

Your hybrid nature is perfect to him because for once, his height difference with you doesn’t seem so scary. He can’t help being big, but at least with your durability he doesn’t have to worry about crushing you

Felix is considered a grunt, muscle and little else, but he’s shared with you his passion for reading and poetry – you never tire of the poems he creates for you

He’s a very proud man so expect to be shown off to all the Guard and basically everyone you ever meet               + “Enough of your chatter! You know your crime, now face your punishment!”                                                           “ I wouldn’t test my mate if I were you.”                                               “Are you really going to reveal such a tactical weakness? They could target her.”                                                           “…I wouldn’t test this extremely beautiful and talented woman I am in no way connected to if I were you.”                    “Smooth Felix, really smooth.”

Once you feel comfortable with Felix, you show him your gift and its extraordinary effects – his eyes widen at the vivid, ethereal shade of green your eyes turn as you lift a hand and coax all the flora in the room towards you, you can expect him to never shut up about it once he knows               + “Can you make another one?”                                                           “Not unless I hunt first.”                                                        “And then you can make me another flower?”

Felix, it turns out, is a giant goofball when he’s at home. You’re so used to seeing the tense guardsmen it is a complete shock to you when you start living with him in Volterra and see how carefree he is within the walls of his own home

You try not to condone his prank war with Demetri since they both get in trouble for it but you can’t resist helping out from time to time…you can tie off water balloons quicker than he can so you make a good accomplice

Felix doesn’t really touch you in public but he does steal kisses to assert his claim on you. He’ll kiss your forehead whenever he enters or exits a room you’re in, presses kisses to your cheek when you pass each other in the corridor

He reserves a kiss on the lips of any kind for when he’s leaving for a while if in public, like if he’s preparing for a mission with the guard for example, but when you’re alone expect to constantly be coddled by him. He wraps himself around you like a blanket and Will. Not. Let. Go!

[jazy3]

Thoughts on Grey’s Anatomy: 17X5

SPOILERS AHEAD!

I’m going to go right ahead and say it. This episode felt like a PSA to me, but it was well done. It was emotional and impactful and the storyline about Bailey’s Mom made me tear up, but at the same time the episode felt very stagnant and I feel like the lives of the other characters didn’t really move forward or go anywhere. It felt like they were all standing still. I liked the conversations between Jackson and Richard and Bailey and Maggie about how COVID has impacted black and brown people more than other races and how unfair that is and how politicians and decision makers need to pay more attention to that.

I loved the conversation between Bailey and Maggie. I liked that they addressed what happened with Maggie’s Mom because that storyline bothered the heck out of me. Maggie treated Meredith and everyone else horribly when all they did was try and help and then she forced her mother to undergo treatments she didn’t want because Maggie couldn’t handle the fact that she was dying and then they just dropped it. I’m glad to see that make a comeback and that Maggie has recognized that what she did and the way she behaved was wrong and is now using that experience to help others.

I loved their comments about guidance counsellors and others assume black people aren’t as bright or as capable as white folks and how insidious that is. It’s not something I’ve experienced myself as a white person, but I’m glad they’re highlighting it. This episode was written by Zoanne Clack who is a black woman and a former E.R. Physician. The previous episode was written by Julie Wong who is an Asian woman and I think it’s great they are utilizing the talent that they have so that people of colour can share their stories and their experiences on a global scale. 

By telling these stories through the lives of characters we know and love and can empathize with it allows people who will never have these experiences understand a little bit more. Representation is important and this show has always done a really good job in my opinion of highlighting important topics and social issues in a sensitive and thoughtful manner. These characters are fictional, but their stories are taken from the lives of real people and I think an important step in the process of creating a better fairer world is creating media that reflects people’s realities in order to cultivate empathy so that people who might not otherwise understand or get it have a window into that experience.

Maybe it changes their mind. Maybe it doesn’t. But the point is that it opens people’s minds to the possibility of seeing a side that they didn’t before and that is half the battle when trying to get people to understand someone else’s experience or point of view. I’m going to be seeing my family this holiday season virtually and in small groups from a safe distance. As is the case for many visiting with relatives over the holidays means having to listen to a lot of ignorant opinions, frustrating statements, and in some cases racial slurs and inappropriate remarks. 

So I’ve been thinking a lot about how I’m going to handle that this year because my tolerance for that crap has gone out the window. All this to say it’s nice to see good people fighting the good fight to get these stories out there to a global audience so that maybe some people will get it and maybe some good will come of it. And even if it doesn’t seeing characters and stories that represent you on screen is powerful and moving and wonderful and we all deserve that. I teared up watching Bailey suffer with the deterioration and death of her Mom.

The end scene where Bailey describes the patients she’s lost to COVID in the voice over while her and Richard sing ‘My Girl’ to give her Mom that moment of peace and a death with dignity got me. It really put a face on the disease. Watching her and her Dad struggle with it was so hard. I loved Bailey’s voice over where she shared info about the COVID patients she’d lost so far and who they were not just their disease. That was well done. Made me tear up.

I loved the talk between Meredith and Bailey at the hospital and on the beach. This episode wasn’t as shocking as the previous ones, but it was still good. I’m glad Meredith is getting better. I will miss the beach, but I’m excited to see her wake up, get better, and hopefully spend some time with Hayes. Which brings me to my chief complaint with this episode which is where the heck was Hayes?!?! This is the second episode he’s been absent from for no discernable reason and no explanation has been given as to where he is.

I did not sign up for this. A big part of the joy I felt when they announced that he was being upped to a main character was the implication that he was going to be given his own storylines and character development outside of Meredith and his relationships with Abigail, Liam, and Austin. But Hayes being absent when Meredith’s not awake robs of him that. Don’t get me wrong. I love Meredith and Hayes together and all I want is for them to be together and live happily ever after.

But, Hayes has such a rich and interesting backstory and there’s so much to explore there. Richard Flood who plays him brings such a wonderful depth to the character and he deserves to have his own story apart from Meredith and I really want to see him interact with the other characters more. We’ve seen him interact significantly with Jo and Bailey, but I’d love to see him interact with Maggie, Amelia, Jackson, and Owen more. His absence this episode reminds me of the episode after the Conference Episode last season where he was suddenly missing for no reason and they didn’t explain where he was.

I’m confused because he was upped to a main character just before this season started so he should be in every episode or almost every episode like the other characters are. I’m starting to get concerned that the actor who plays him has fallen ill or tested positive for COVID-19 or that he’s dealing with some kind of family emergency and so they had to cut him out of the episode last minute. I hope I’m wrong, but I honestly can’t think of another reason the actor would be missing for upwards of 2 to 4 weeks when these episodes were filmed.

I can’t see his absence being a story choice because it doesn’t make any sense and they haven’t addressed it on screen as they usually do when an actor has departed or needs time off and they have time to write that in. He also doesn't appear to be in the promo for next week’s episode which is strange considering it shows another meeting being held by Richard where some of the other department heads can be seen and we get shots of most of the other characters. After the Premiere aired he appeared in the promo for Episode 3 standing outside Meredith’s window and in that episode we saw them have a heart to heart that I thought was really beautiful and lovely.

At this point it’s unclear if Meredith even knows that Hayes is the one that found her and got her help and is distraught over her condition. He’s the head of Peds which is a pretty important department. Where the heck is he? They can gladly write off other characters in the second half of the season to give him more screen time in my opinion. I really hope the actor and his family are okay.  I’d also hate for his sudden absence to wreck Meredith’s storyline.

I love their friendship and flirtations and I’d hate to see her wind up alone or with someone that clearly isn’t right for her and that she doesn’t really love because something unexpected happened with the actor. I really really hope he’s in the mid-season finale next week! Jo suddenly declaring that she wants to quit general surgery to become an OBGYN came out of nowhere and makes no sense to me.

She spent years being with and then married to the Head of Pediatric Surgery and was decidedly lukewarm on the idea of having kids or even being near them. So her and Alex split and in the wake of that she randomly decides she wants to be an OBGYN and deliver babies? What the heck? I’m also confused because I feel like Hayes should have been there because it was a Peds case and he wasn’t and if Jo wants to re-specialize it would make sense for her to talk to Carina or Hayes.

Carina’s a main character on Station 19 and is still reoccurring on Grey’s so she can talk to her for an episode or two, but anymore than that and I think that would fall under Hayes perview because he’s a main character. But he’s currently MIA and we don’t know why. I did love Jo’s scenes with Levi though. They’re always hilarious and I think they bounce off of each other really well. I’m glad that Tom improved and apparently isn’t dying.

I like him with Teddy and I hope they get back together at some point. I’m glad they are choosing to be friends again. More than anything I want Teddy to pick a lane here. Owen or Tom. Pick one and go with it. Stop flip flopping all over the place like a fish out of water. Teddy’s a hot mess these days. I liked Amelia’s speech to Teddy. She has feelings about what Teddy did and didn’t do, but as she says she herself has done horrible things, some of them involving Owen, so she’s not in any place to judge, but she also doesn’t want to be friends with Teddy or really talk to her. And that’s fair. I have to say I love Amelia post-tumour. She’s great.

Also what happened to Casey Parker the resident from last season who was transgender and former military? I really liked him! Where did he go? I’d much rather see him that DeLuca or Nico on screen. Based on what I caught of next week’s promo it looks the COVID situation at Grey Sloan is about to get worse. We see Richard addressing staff in the cafeteria saying that they need to prepare for a surge of patients and that their patient load could double. We’re in May in the current Grey’s timeline so that fits.

It’s apparently also a cross over. I don’t want another cross over. I want to know where the hell Hayes is! And it looks like Amelia is back in the OR and the doctors are treating two teenagers who were kidnapped and held captive. Yikes! And we see Meredith smiling at someone on the beach before suddenly waking up. My guess is that it’s Derek and we are finally going to get to see them embrace and then Meredith is going to return to the land of the living. And hopefully interact with Hayes.

Until next time!

[wydguk]

play date — jjk

pairing: jungkook x reader

genre: angst, fluff, FWB!au, college!au

warnings: mentions of sex, kinda toxic relationship?

word count: 4k

summary: You never understood how it was so easy for Jungkook to make people like him. It was so easy to love him — the way his nose scrunched up and his bunny teeth were on display. He had the prettiest heart, and words always failed you when you tried to describe how much you loved him.

note: this is based off of Melanie Martinez’s “Play Date”! I do not own the lyrics in any way, shape or form.

♡ 

If there’s one thing you’ve always known, it’s that you are hopelessly in love with Jeon Jungkook.

It’s always been easy to love Jungkook. You fell in love with him when he showed up to your first lecture half an hour late, his hair dishevelled and his clothes out of place. He just sent a sheepish smile to your professor, who sent him a pointed glare, before taking his seat next to you.

“Hey, I’m Jungkook. What are we doing?” He set his backpack onto the floor and took out his textbook, and you decided right then and there that you liked him. He was the epitome of a classic college boy, with the nicest smile and wide eyes.

“I’m Y/N. We’re just doing the introduction,” you hesitated before pushing your notebook toward him. “You could copy my notes if you want to?” 

Jungkook beams at you, bunny teeth on display. “Thanks!

He sits next to you at every lecture after that.

♡

You loved him when he invited you to your very first college party. Always invested in your studies, and never one to party, it was already February by the time you decided to loosen up a little.

“Y/N! Wanna come to my party this weekend? It’s going to be at my frat house,” Pouting, he tugged your arm, eyes begging you to come. “Please! You don’t even have to drink any alcohol. I just want you to be there! It’s the first time I’m hosting the party, so it’s definitely going to be the best one you’ve ever been to.”

“It’s also going to be the first one I’ve ever been to, Kook. How can I trust your party hosting skills?” You grinned at him, and his eyes narrow, pouting even harder. “Come on! You know how cool I can be, therefore, the party will be cool.”

He wasn’t very good at promoting his “very cool party”, but you had to give him credit for trying. Anything for a friend, right? “Fine, I’ll go.”

That night, you ended up in bed with Jeon Jungkook. You woke up the next morning with bruises on your hips and a pounding headache — and a very naked Jungkook next to you. Later in the afternoon, you and Jungkook established that you were now friends with benefits.

“Okay, so we probably need to set some rules.” you mused, pen already in hand, both of you sitting at your kitchen island. “You have any in mind?” You already know what the rules will be. You can’t catch feelings — but Jungkook doesn’t have to know, does he?

“None of us can catch feelings. If we do, we tell the other person before the situation gets any worse. Also, we have to get tested. You don’t have to write that down, I just wanna make sure we’re clean.” Jungkook said, lazily making his sandwich. “Do you wanna see other people?”

Of course, you don’t. Who else are you supposed to see? The teddy bear in your room? The posters of actors on the street? But you know Jungkook’s popular among the ladies, and you can’t force him to stop seeing them just because you’re sad, lonely and in love with him. “I don’t see people at all. But you can, I don’t mind. Use protection, yeah?”

Jungkook chuckled and handed you a sandwich, happily munching his own. “Are we done? I wanna watch Netflix while you suck my-!”

“Shut up!” You could feel the heat rising to your cheeks, and you’re sure the blush wouldn’t go unnoticed by Jungkook. “We are not done! You still need to sign it or else this contract is useless and you might just fall in love with me.”

Jungkook just grinned at you, stealing your pen and signing haphazardly onto the sheet of paper.

You’d be perfectly fine with it if he fell in love with you.

Too bad your friendship seems to crumble as the years pass you by. You’re both in your third year, and you’re still in love with him, more than you thought was possible.

You wonder if you’re even friends anymore. He stopped hanging out with you, stopped inviting you to his parties, and only called you when he was drunk or horny. The agreement stopped being “Friends with Benefits” and turned into “Booty Call”. But you still come over every time, even though you know he’s not interested in going any further than this and you know you’re in love with him.

The house is always empty when you come over, so it’s always you and him, him and you alone. There’s never much talking, never any conversation, but if this is the only way you can have Jungkook, you’ll take it. You’re always leaving the house as quick as possible, and no matter how much you want to talk to Jungkook, you throw your clothes on when he goes to the bathroom, and by the time he gets out, you’re already on your way home. Whenever you do try, he never really listens, too busy exploring your body to pay attention to what you’re saying.

You’re sick of playing games with him, and only God knows how much you want to be more than just friends. But Jungkook doesn’t know that — so are you chasing after someone who isn’t even running?

It’s two in the morning when Jungkook texts you, asking if he can come over. You agree, and he shows up at your door thirty minutes later with a box of pizza in his hands. It reminds you of your first year in college, when you were really friends, and Jungkook would binge-watch Disney shows with you on Netflix until it was well past midnight. You would wake up to grease stains all over your coffee table and a snoring Jungkook by your side, close to falling off the couch.

“What’s up, Kook? Did you wanna do a re-enactment of us in first year?” There’s hurt in your voice, but over the past few years, Jungkook’s gotten too full of himself to notice how he makes other people feel.

“Nope, Chaeyeon bailed on movie night, so then I asked Soyeon, and then I asked Mina but they weren’t free. Good thing you were! The pizza is still kinda hot, unless you want to heat it up?” Jungkook struts into your apartment like he owns it and flops onto the couch. “Missed your couch. Best place to do things, you know? We can watch TV, play video games, and I can fuck you here!”

Of course, you’re not Jungkook’s first choice. You’re not even his second or third choice. You have never been a priority in Jungkook’s life — this would’ve hurt you two years ago, but you’re not even fazed this time. You’re surprised you’re even a choice in the first place.

“I’m honestly shocked you even considered me. Where would you go if I said no? I bet you have a long, long list of girls who would wanna do this with you.” You’re being childish and you know it, but loving Jungkook is getting tiring. You want to tell him, but if you do, he’ll never speak to you again. This way, you can still have Jungkook, but not in the ways you want to.

“Jealous, baby?” Jungkook laughs, taking a slice of pizza out of the box. “I missed you. We haven’t actually talked in months. You don’t even reply to the memes I send you anymore!”

Is he serious? He must be playing a joke on you. “Jungkook, you basically cut me out of your life. It would be weird for us to talk again.” Did he not ghost you on purpose? Jungkook’s appearance makes you more confused than you should be.

“Cut you out? You mean me not inviting you to my parties? Baby, we’ve known each other so long, you’re practically a VIP,” He sits up, eyebrows furrowed. “Why do you care so much? Our deal not enough for you?”

Will you ever get enough of Jungkook? You can tell he’s hinting at something, and the thought of him knowing how much you feel for him scares you. So you lie, lie like you’ve been doing for the past few years.

“I don’t care, Jungkook. I really don’t give a fuck. Did anyone tell you I gave a shit about you?” You declare this with no expression, hoping he doesn’t see right through you. Apparently it works, because he just reaches for your hand, pulls you onto the couch and stuffs a slice of pizza into your mouth.

He sends you that stupid smirk he uses on all his flings, and you remember that you’re just a fling too, you’re just a toy to him, and the communication between you is little to none.

You’re just a toy to him, and all you’ll ever have with him are play dates.

When Jungkook asks you to stay over, it’s always the best feeling to you. This only happens when he’s feeling particularly drunk and clingy, hands never leaving your waist, even when he’s sleeping deeply, nose buried in your neck. You get to wake up next to him, and since he’s the heaviest sleeper you know, you get to watch the slow rise of his chest and the way his eyelashes rest against his cheeks for the shortest while until his friends start banging their fists on his bedroom door. 

“Wake up, lovebirds! Seokjin made pancakes!” Hoseok hollers, fists heavy against the door. You shake Jungkook awake, smiling softly at the way he throws his arm over his face, eyes trying to adjust to the morning light.

“Pancakes, Kook! I’ll eat yours if you don’t get up.” At this, Jungkook bolts up, pinching your side then grabbing a shirt from his closet. “Kook, do you maybe wanna-” Before you can continue, he grabs your hand and pulls you down the stairs, looking like a five-year-old on Christmas morning.

Jungkook’s friends have always been nice to you, even before you and Jungkook started the benefits, so you wonder if they eat breakfast with Jungkook’s other flings. Too shy to really make conversation with anyone, you focus on your plate, missing the way Taehyung and Namjoon motion toward you every so often.

That afternoon, you’re in Jungkook’s room again, the two of you watching another episode of a shitty teen drama on his laptop. Jungkook insists he only watches it to make fun of the characters, but you know he tends to get so immersed in the episodes he actually starts laughing at the cringy jokes and tries to figure out the puzzles.

“I’m bored.” Jungkook pauses the episode and shuts his laptop. “Also, I wanted to try something new. I saw this thing online, it was a list of kinks? Do you wanna try?” He wiggles his brows while trying to wink, and your heart is so full of love for him, especially now that’s he’s talking to you and hanging out with you. You could really get used to this again.

“Let’s play Monopoly first, yeah? Then we can look at that list,” you smile, hoping he agrees. He pulls the box from under his bed, and it’s really dusty. Your heart swoons at the thought of him only playing the game with you, but you remind yourself that you’re just friends who mess around, and nothing more.

You’re curious to know if Jungkook knows what monopoly could mean — how you wish you could make him love you back. Do you care too much about Jungkook? He obviously couldn’t care less about you, but you’re always falling at his feet to please him. You wish it wasn’t this way.

♡

You love Jungkook even when you’re arguing over the dumbest reasons.

Of course, you really have no reason to argue when you’re nothing more than friends with benefits, but your feelings always tend to get the best of you, and you forget he only wants your body and not you.

From the get-go, you knew this agreement between you was doomed. You were in love with him before it even started, and you’re still in love with him now. But why did you stay, knowing all he could give you was friendship, the benefits, and nothing more? How many times has he hurt you, but you still choose to stay? All the empty words you exchanged with him could have been affectionate with someone else if you chose to back out of the agreement — but when it comes down to it, you would always go back to Jungkook.

You entered your apartment an hour ago only to see Jungkook curled up into a ball on your couch, staring blankly at your TV screen, which was playing another episode of Jungkook’s shitty teen drama. He doesn’t notice your presence until you sit down next to him with a glass of water in your hands.

“Did you not leave this morning? I thought you had a lecture at one,” you ask, heart aching at the sight of Jungkook looking so unlike himself. You were used to seeing him prancing around campus and causing chaos with his friends, or at a restaurant with another one of his conquests. It was unlikely for Jungkook to be in your apartment, or to look so distressed and empty, so the fact that he was doing both of these things concerned you, to say the very least.

“Are you seeing someone else?” Jungkook finally looks at you, and his eyes pierce your soul, his glare cold. You’re not seeing anyone, but why does it mean anything to him? He’s with a different girl every night, and he’s never committed to a relationship in the two years you’ve known him. “Jimin told me he saw you on a date with someone at the library.”

Scoffing in disbelief, you try to analyze Jungkook’s expression for any hints of a joke, or amusement, but he’s completely serious. “What is it to you if I am seeing someone else? We’re barely friends, Jungkook.” you mutter, feeling accused. As if you could ever get over him. All you could do was get under him, and there was never any escape.

“When we started this, you said you didn’t see people. Now you’re going around with other guys?” Jungkook huffs, running a hand through his hair. “Way to commit to the contract, Y/N.”

“Are you fucking with me? You’re out with different girls every single night!  And we never said I wasn’t allowed to see other people. I just haven’t been seeing anyone! Is it really that hard for you to believe that I can have a love life too?” You really want to know where this is coming from. Could this be a dare from one of the boys?

“I just don’t like seeing you with other guys! I’m used to calling you my girl around my friends, they practically think we’re dating at this point.” Jungkook stands up, fingers tugging at his hair. It was a stark contrast to the Jungkook you were used to seeing, and his words only messed with your mind as you struggled to piece his anger.

“That’s just it, isn’t it? We’re not dating, Jungkook. And we both know I’m not your girl! Where is this coming from? This isn’t like you,” you’re standing up too, arms crossed with a frown on your face.

“You know what? You’re right. We’re not dating. I’m sorry for wasting your time. Forget about this, I’m leaving.” Jungkook quickly shoves on his jacket, eyes still angry. This is the most confusing argument you’ve ever had with him, and it’s sad to think that this could be one of your longest conversations in the past few months.

“What the hell, Jungkook! You lash out at me for doing something you don’t understand, and when I try to solve it, you try to back out! I never fucking know what you need, or what you want, and yet I still try to satisfy your every whim!” Jungkook already has his shoes on, and he only sends you a heart-wrenching glare before slamming the door shut.

Jungkook doesn’t talk to you after that.

♡

In the silence of your heart and mind, the love you feel for Jungkook is still echoing against the walls, and no matter how many times you tell yourself that you and Jungkook’s deal is essentially over after weeks of no contact, your soul aches to see Jungkook again, to let him hold you in his arms and trash your living room with popcorn and grease stains.

You have come to the conclusion that learning to love Jungkook is so easy, but loving him is the hardest thing you’ve ever done in your life. Loving Jungkook wasn’t dancing on clouds or cuddling under blankets. Loving Jungkook is walking miles in the rain on the cold and slippery streets or drowning in the deepest parts of the sea with weights pulling you down, but it would always be with his hand in yours. You would do anything the world had to offer if it meant Jungkook would be by your side all the way.

The sudden revelation drops your heart to your stomach and you suddenly feel the need to find Jungkook and finally tell him the truth. You realise having Jungkook only on occasional weeknights will never be enough for you, when you want to sleep and wake up in his arms, and hold his hand as you walk around mindlessly, and meet his parents and charm them into letting you marry their son.

You jump up from your place on the couch, where you’ve gathered all your stuffed toys and blankets to bask in your shame and rush into your room, frantically looking for something presentable to wear. Contemplating on whether you should wear makeup or not, you decide against it. After all, all you’re going to do is tell Jungkook how you feel, right?

You’re about to open the door when the realization of what you’re about to do dawns on you. How can you be sure Jungkook won’t reject you? What if after you confess, Jungkook cuts you out of his life completely, and the only memories you’ll have of him are hazy nights with all the lights turned out, and the last you’ll remember of him is the argument you had? What if you tell him only to find out that he’s met someone else, and he thinks he’s already in love?

Even so, your heart yearns to tell Jungkook how much you love him, and the possibilities of what could happen after are endless. Maybe you might lose Jungkook, but there was a chance you could have him in every way you wanted. You’ll never know if you never try.

Before you can reach for the door handle, there’s a knock on your door, and you rack your brain trying to remember if you ordered anything for delivery. Already in a rush, you pull the door open all the way, expecting to see someone dressed in an Uber Eats uniform, only to be met with a wide-eyed Jungkook.

“Y/N,” Jungkook breathes, as if he’s scared that if he doesn’t tread carefully you’ll disappear. “Are you going somewhere? I just wanted to talk,” His eyes are pleading and hopeful, and you have to force yourself to look away before you get lost in them.

“No, I was just about to see you,” you murmur, stepping aside to let him in. Hands shaking, you close the door and turn around to face Jungkook. “I actually have something I want to tell you.”

“Can I ask you something first?” When you nod, Jungkook lets out a shaky sigh, scratching the nape of his neck. “That night, when I came over with pizza and I asked you why you cared so much about me excluding you from my life. Did you mean it?”

“You mean me not caring at all?”

“Tell me you didn’t mean it,” Jungkook begs. “Please tell me you care.”

“Kook, you know I care. I always care about you and whatever it is you want to have to do with me. Listen, I know we said we wouldn’t bring feelings into this but I have to be honest with you,” Jungkook’s looking at you with that unreadable expression he uses all the time, and your heart starts racing faster, hands slippery with sweat. “I already had feelings for you before we started the whole ‘friends with benefits’ thing. I know you don’t want to commit to anything, but I just really had to tell you because it was eating me up inside,”

Jungkook’s silent for a few moments until he beams at you, nose scrunched and bunny teeth on display. “What are you trying to say, baby? You have feelings for me?” He pulls you closer to him, wrapping his hands around your waist. “Because I’ve been in love with you since first year,”

You raise an eyebrow at this, obviously not believing him. “Yea, you were so in love with me that you went around fucking other girls,” You can’t help but snicker — Jungkook was known for his track record with girls.

“Hey! I’m not kidding! They were all just friends.” he whines, stomping his foot. He looks like an overgrown child, but it really just adds to his cuteness factor.

“Okay, then you were so in love with me that you stopped hanging out with me for your friends,” You still weren’t convinced. “You were so distant, Kook. That’s not love,”

“I didn’t admit I was in love with you until the end of our second year — you were always a constant in my life, and I got so used to having you with me that I didn’t realise how whipped I was for you. So I tried to get over you by ignoring you, which obviously didn’t work. You can ask the boys! I would never stop talking about you so they locked me out of the house for hours.” Jungkook’s pouting again, and you have to remind yourself that this could all be a cruel joke.

Pulling yourself out of his arms, you fold your own arms across your chest, sending him a scowl. “You’re a grade-A asshole, Jeon Jungkook. For months you cut me out of your life and made me think it was my fault. Now you’re saying you’re in love with me? I haven’t forgotten about our argument either.”

“I may have gotten overly jealous?” Jungkook smiles sheepishly. “I promise I’ll make it up to you. Just listen to what I have to say.”

Sticking your tongue out at him, you say, “Maybe I should take back my feelings for you,”

“Nope, I’m not letting you. How about we re-introduce ourselves? We can start from the beginning and not have the whole ‘friends with benefits’ agreement,” Jungkook suggests, and you wonder how long he’s thought about doing this.

“Fine. Hi, I’m Y/N and I think you’re really cute.” Jungkook’s cheeks flush the very slightest at this and he cups his face, trying to hide it.

“Hey, I’m Jungkook, and I really want to kiss you,” Before you can say anything, he tugs your hand and kisses you, and the kiss is different from all the kisses you’ve had before. It’s short and sweet, and nothing like the lust-fuelled, messy kisses you used to share. “Let’s go on a date! Right now!”

Laughing, you intertwine your fingers with his and squeeze as hard you can. “You have a whole lot of apologising to do, Jeon.”

“Anything for you, baby.”

♡

You love Jungkook when he’s smashing cake into your face on your first date, then he takes you to play laser tag only to gang up on you with the strangers you’re playing with. And six months later when you meet his parents for the first time, they approve of the engagement and the marriage that you’ve yet to discuss, already coming up with names for their grandchildren. Jungkook’s face looks like a tomato as he’s profusely trying to apologize for his parents, but you’re okay with it, because you have him by your side.

♡

a/n: another jungkook fic arghh i have so many drafts with the other members but i wanted to type this out real quick. by real quick i mean like 3 days and now it is currently 4:26 AM where i am so that is fun

the relationship is kinda toxic hmmm would u guys wanna see mini drabbles of jungkook and y/n healing their relationship together? you can send any asks if u want :)

anyway, thank you very much for reading!! like or reblog if you enjoyed it and feel free to tell me what you think! my dms are always open <3

[thomaslightwood]

A Kind of Magic

Chapter one: One Vision

A dream of sweet illusion:

A glimpse of hope and unity,

And visions of one sweet union.

(recommend, but not necessary to read/hear the song)

•

In this moment Thomas had one goal and that was to make it to the Devil Tavern. As fast as possible.

It wasn’t because he was running from something but because he needed to be alone. This was the closest place he could think of where he could be alone for now. He knew that James and Matthew were training together in the Institute and Christopher was with Henry doing their new experiment with that ichor. So their room should be empty, right?

When he entered the establishment he barely looked at the people there. He smiled at Polly and nodded at a few other Downworlders but didn’t stop to chat like usual. 

Thomas tramped upstairs to their room, wanting air. He opened some of the old windows and looked at Fleet Street. It was almost lunch. He had to meet with Lucie soon. 

By the Angel, Thomas had to calm down and to put himself together. He couldn’t do anything in his current state. He ran a hand through his hair and took a deep breath. 

The problem was one particular person. One person with sharp tongue, fair hair and black eyes. His face was in front of Tom’s sight. This one vision he just couldn’t escape. 

The Carstairs arrival shouldn’t have been be surprising. At all. It was common knowledge that Lucie and Cordelia are gonna be parabatai. He just hadn’t thought about it much. Because thinking about the Carstairs means thinking about Alastair. And this always reminded him of Paris. And how confused he was after that. Thomas still was confused. Just less then before. 

Love is confusing, Thomas thought. And strange. Like some spell on you which makes you dizzy. Some dark magic that stretches your heart with killing hope. 

Yes, this had to be. A kind of magic. 

• 

When Thomas finally arrived at the Institute Lucie was already waiting for him in the emty ballroom. Many books and papers were in the big table which they usually used when they’re here.

“Sorry for being late” said Thomas guiltily. 

Lucie just smiled at him, clearly in a good mood. 

“Don’t worry. I’m not in hurry.”

Thomas pulled a chair to sit, facing Lucie. “You said you need help with a translation?”

“That’s right,” she said excitedly. Lucie bring in front of him few papers which he knew were drafts of Lucie’s tales. She liked this paper and used it to write on.

“So, you know about the Carstairs arrival, right?”

Thomas managed to nod. His heart was beating fast. “Anna told me about an hour ago.”

Lucie smiled happily. “I heard about it today as well. And wanted to do something special for Daisy.” Lucie took a few other papers and two books. Dictionaries, Thomas realized. “And I came up with this: to translate The Beautiful Cordelia in Persian.” 

Thomas raised eyebrows, distracted from his thoughts of Alastair for a moment.

“Luce, you have been writing it since you were twelve. To translate it all… it would take weeks. Months.”

“I know,” she sighed. “Four years writing. I know there no chance to do it before their arrival. But I thought it may be ready for our parabatai ceremony.” Lucie looked at all the paper on the table and smiled hopefully at him. “However, that’s why I wanted your help, Tom. With you beside me it would be so much faster! So… Will you help?” asked Lucie, pleading.

“Of course Luce!” said Thomas without hesitation. “No need to ask. But do you know when will be your ceremony?”

“No idea” said Lucie honestly. “But I believe we can choose the date. I will convince Cordelia to be in a time after we are ready.”

“You thought about everything, didn’t you?” Thomas smiled.

Lucie laughed.

“We are talking about my parabatai after all. Now, let’s begin!”

“Let’s begin,” Thomas repeated. There were a lot of work to be done. 

•

When Thomas entered the Devil Tavern for the second time this day it was almost evening. 

He was with Matthew and James. Together they left the Institute, already in gear, ready to hunt demons. They had to take Christopher before the fall of the night to start patrolling London’s streets.

“I just have to pick up some knifes I forgot last time,” James said. “It won’t take long.”

“Jamie loves his knifes too much sometimes” sighed his parabatai.

So now Matthew and Thomas were waiting for him. Matthew ordered one drink for himself but Thomas didn’t want. He prefered his mind to be clear before a battle.

His charming friend chatted with Polly who was already laughing.

Thomas asked  himself if he should take something to eat. He hadn’t eat anything since he met with Lucie. Maybe this could stop his thoughts to wander around Alastair Carstairs. 

“Hey Tom,” Matthew called him. Thomas didn’t realize when his conversion with Polly ended. “Isn’t Christopher the one who usually isn’t here?” he asked with a smile.

Thomas tried to smile back but Matthew was right. His mind was elsewhere.

“I’m fine,” he said. He hoped he was not a liar.

Matthew drank from the drink a little, still looking at Thomas.

“Is there someone special?” he asked, curious.

Thomas didn’t answer. 

“Is it that werewolf girl who was running after you for while?”

“By the Angel, Matthew,” he sighed.

Thomas still felt a little embarrassed thinking about the whole situation. Her name was Bella. She was chasing him for a few weeks and was absolutely shameless. In the end Thomas forced himself to tell her that he liked another person and didn’t want her hurt, which was true. Bella was very disappointed but said she’s fine. Asked about this person though but Thomas refused to tell her anything. It felt too private to share it with someone else.

He thought about Alastair again. For long, maybe longer then Thomas wanted to admit, the Persian was the only one he thought about this way. 

There was thousand little things about him. Flash of light in his eyes. The sweet illusion of his hands. His voice. His everything. One heart. One soul. He was the glimpse of the brightest dream in the dark rains.

Thomas felt breathless. The love wasn’t what he ever imagined it would be. There’s no black and no white. It was all the colors at one.

“Thomas!”

He startled and looked at Matthew. He forgot that his friend was still there.

“There is definitely someone,” Matthew said, already grinning. 

“Are you hungry?” Thomas asked, desperate to change the topic.

Polly came near them, rising an eyebrow. 

“Do I know this person? Is it a lady or a gentleman?” the blond kept asking, ignoring Tom’s question.

Thomas looked at Polly, trying not to blush.

“Just gimme fried chicken,” he murmured.

•

A/N: one big shout out for Teddy (@fair-y-child) who was so kind to edit my chapters! Thank you Teo for your help, it wouldn’t be the same without you ❤️

People who wanted to be tagged (thanks to every one of you, I didn’t expect so many people to ask for it): @christopher-lightwood-my-heart @panicatwallmaria @thomaslightwoodx @thomastair-paris @lavanyalol @lucexherondale @tom-carstairs @im-gay-for-cordelia-carstairs @vintage-morning-wine @ab-cedario @daisycordelia @crying-is-your-latest-fashion @a-very-gay-spider (btw I will keep tagging you if you don’t tell me to stop)

[sonicrainicorn]

A Familiar Face

Part of the Berry Done AU

Words: 5121 Desc.: Their relationship is still rough around the edges, but Patton and Logan are making it work. One trip to the store and a blast from the past might shake things up all over again.  Or; in which an old friend makes an appearance and Patton feels threatened. TW: None(?)

///

They were out of milk.

It wasn’t that big of a deal. If Patton were to be honest, he wouldn’t have suggested they go to the store if he knew what would come out of it. Yes, that was the jealousy talking (God, he really needed to get over that) but it was still what he thought. He also thought she was too bubbly and too cutesy and had a smile that was way too blinding and -- wait, what was he saying? Right, milk.

Patton noticed they were out when he went to get cereal that morning. There was enough for the twins, but that was it. He was grateful there was even that much. A war would have started in their kitchen if there was only enough for one of the boys to have cereal with.

They had a system implemented in their house when it came to groceries. A slip of paper was posted to the fridge, and whenever something ran out it would be written on the paper. Sometimes Roman or Virgil tried to write various snacks or treats on there in the hopes of getting extra junk food. It worked eight times out of ten because Patton has a habit of not double-checking and Logan can’t say no. So out of habit, Patton wrote ‘milk’ on the list. Then he noticed the paper was full.

Naturally, he brought it up with Logan.

“So go to the store,” Logan responded groggily. Princess Leia had her head resting on his hip, fast asleep.

There were days where Logan slept in instead of waking up at his usual time. There didn’t seem to be any type of pattern to it -- it happened whenever it happened -- so Patton didn’t know if it should concern him. “Did you maybe want to come with me?”

Logan blew out a puff of air and closed his eyes. “Five minutes.”

Patton left him alone.

Ever since the... er... Incident, Patton tried twice as hard to do whatever Logan wanted or needed. No questions asked. It was, quite literally, the very least he could do. 

He regretted The Incident from the moment it happened, and every moment after served to reinforce what a terrible person he was. He honestly didn’t deserve Logan or the life they made together. It almost felt like stealing. Some days he genuinely thought that. He was stealing Logan, Roman, and Virgil from someone else -- someone better -- but dang if he wasn’t selfish enough to keep them. He was lucky they even decided to stay at all.

Thinking about losing them made him sick. Maybe if Logan had been a little more angry -- if Patton had gotten a little further -- they wouldn’t have stayed. The twins wouldn’t have tried to see good in him, Logan wouldn’t have tried to reconnect. He would be left alone with his mistakes. Maybe that’s what he deserved now. Maybe he didn’t deserve a second chance. But that’s what he had. He had another shot to prove how much they all meant to him. That was more than he could ever ask for. He knew Logan might not ever forgive him, but he’d die happy with the fact he wasn’t hated.

“Wrong aisle, Patton,” Logan chided absentmindedly. He guided the end of the cart with his hand without looking away from his phone.

Patton chuckled; a nervous, breathy thing. “Oh, right.” He continued down the correct way. “I forgot what we were looking for.”

Logan glanced up at him with the ghost of a smile. “That’s why I’m here.”

“Also because I love you.” Patton gave him a tiny grin. He made it a habit to tell Logan he loved him as often as he could. It didn’t erase anything, but gentle reminders were nice.

“That too.”

The two went down many different aisles, chatting between themselves. They spoke of basic topics such as work or siblings. Talking had gotten a lot easier since The Incident, but it still felt like heavy walls were put up. Not that Patton could blame Logan or anything. After everything he had been through, it would be hard to give out second chances.

Still, a lot of progress had been made. Logan could be in the same room as Patton now. And Patton could look at Logan without feeling immense guilt. They never brought up The Incident at any point. Neither of them could bear to talk about it. It hurt too much.

“No, Patton, we’re not getting cake mix. Put your hand down.” Logan spoke without even needing to look at him.

Patton pouted but did as he was told regardless.

Logan put the vegetable oil in the cart. “You wouldn’t even be able to make it, anyway.”

“Hey -- I’m not that bad.” He continued to push the cart down the aisle. “I can at least do pre-packaged things.”

“Oh, sure.” Logan couldn’t hold back a smirk. “Last time that went well.”

Patton flushed. “It was an accident.”

“That’s why you always check the oven first.” He turned down another aisle, leaving Patton an embarrassed mess.

Logan continued to tease him all throughout their trip. He made sure to bring up any and all possible past situations that Patton found less than ideal (including, but not limited to, the “dom” conversation). It caused Logan to laugh a bit so the embarrassment was worth it.

By the time they were getting their items scanned, Logan had brought up just about all of Patton’s embarrassing moments. Patton tried to ignore how red his face was as he paid for everything. He let the onslaught continue as they made their way to their car.

“Logan?”

The two stopped to face the woman who had spoken. Her long blonde hair reached the end of her back in a loose braid. Her sharp blue eyes scanned every inch of Logan’s face. Their heights were similar, with the woman being less than an inch shorter. Not that that was an accomplishment or anything. Logan was a tiny man at a whopping five feet and (barely) six inches.

“Logan Sanders?”

She appeared dainty -- but not fragile. More like a ballet dancer. In fact, with the way she held herself, she might have been. The aura around her screamed professionalism and far more than it ever did for Logan. Which of itself was an impressive feat.

Logan stared at her, mind no doubt racing, until it visibly clicked. “Cara?”

Cara beamed. “It is you! Oh my goodness.” She put both hands on her chest. “I’d recognize that dorky smile anywhere.”

Logan’s smile widened. Patton caught the light pink that dusted his cheeks. “I can’t -- I -- wow.” He let out a breath of laughter. “I’d never thought I’d see you again.”

“I know,” she squealed. “But look at you. You’re all grown up! Still tiny as ever, though.” She winked.

“Well, I’m taller than you now.” Logan crossed his arms. “That’s all I ever wanted to be.”

Cara scoffed. “Barely.” Her eyes caught onto Patton. “Who’s this?”

Logan seemed to remember they weren’t alone. “Oh!” He turned to Patton, who noticed how wide his smile was. “This is my husband, Patton.”

Cara squealed again. “You’re married?! Oh my goodness, Lo-bear, that’s amazing.” She bounced on the balls of her feet. “I can’t believe this. It feels like just yesterday I was beating up girls for you about not having a crush and now you’re married. Gosh, it’s been far too long.”

“I can agree with you there.”

Logan’s smile was so wide. He looked so happy -- far happier than Patton had ever seen him in days. But the way he looked at Cara made his heart hurt. He let his smile be free around her. He let her hear his loud laugh. That’s something Patton never got. Not even before The Incident. Logan was always so timid with those things -- afraid to get a hurtful reaction that would never come -- but he dropped all his walls with Cara. It... it didn’t feel fair.

Now, Patton knew he didn’t have a right to demand things from Logan (especially after the damage he caused), but he couldn’t help but feel cheated. Cheated out of bright smiles and bubbly giggles. Cheated out of defenseless conversations. Because Logan had always been defensive. He never smiled because he hated it. He never laughed because it was annoying. He never talked more than he should because someone might get mad. He built up so many walls because that’s what he had been forced to do. And it took Patton years to break them all down. Cara knocked them down with a single look.

What did she have that Patton didn’t? Why did she get a free pass? What was so special about her? Logan mentioned her once. Once. Out of all the years they knew each other, Patton heard her name exactly one time. A best friend. A girl who beat up bullies and kept promises. She moved away as she and Logan started middle school.

“You should join us for dinner tonight.”

Logan’s cheery voice dragged Patton out of his brooding. She even managed to get him to talk out of his level, stoic tone. Why was she so much better?

“Oh, I’d love that.” She grinned at him. Total heart eyes. “Would that be alright with you, Patton?”

Patton blinked. “Uh,” play nice, play nice, “sure. I guess. It’s just gonna be spaghetti.”

Her grin never left her face. “Sounds lovely.”

This was the first time Patton ever found himself annoyed at someone’s positivity. Is this what it was like to deal with him all the time? How could anyone stand it?

“I’ll text you the address,” Logan continued. Wait -- when did they exchange numbers? “It was so great seeing you again. I still can’t believe it.”

Cara threw her arms around him in a tight hug. “I missed you so much, Lo-bear.”

Logan laughed. “You know, people tend to ask before going in for a hug.”

“You think I’m going to ask a big teddy bear for a hug instead of going right in?” She pulled away to smirk at him.

He flushed. Patton couldn’t help but latch on to the detail of his hands on her hips. “Still not over calling me that?”

“Never.”

After that whole thing was over, Patton and Logan put the groceries in the car then left to go back home. Patton couldn’t think of anything other than how Cara and Logan interacted. He tried so hard to let any other thought get in, but he couldn’t do it.

“She called you Lo-bear,” the words tumbled out of Patton’s mouth before he could stop them.

“What? Oh,” Logan shrugged, “she used to insist on giving me different nicknames. That was just one of her favorites.”

Patton hummed. He didn’t think anyone but Thomas referred to Logan as ‘bear’. He didn’t think Logan would even let anyone else call him ‘bear’, yet Cara did it twice. As casually as if she had done it all her life.

Logan furrowed his brows. “Are you alright? You seem a little off right now.”

“Who? Me?” He scoffed. “Never better. Perfectly fine. I’m doing great. Oh, look, we’re home.” He got out of the car before Logan could question him further.

Luckily, he didn’t try to bring it up again. That was fine with Patton. He didn’t want to admit to something if he didn’t have to.

By the time dinner was ready, Patton felt a little more like himself. He managed to disregard his less than ideal feelings over the earlier interaction and focus on the tasks at hand. He started calling the twins to the table when someone knocked at the door. Princess Leia did her “intruder alert” barks to which Logan shushed her, mumbling about needing to get her to stop doing that.

Patton stepped into the living room and his heart dropped. Cara stood at the doorway with her bright smile and sparkling eyes. Her hair was out of the braid and fell over her shoulders in soft waves. She greeted Logan with another tight hug and Patton felt a twinge of something in his stomach.

Her eyes first landed on Princess Leia. “Oh how cute!” She walked over to rub her head. “You’re such a pretty puppy. Oh my gosh, yes you are.” She continued to coo as Leia discovered she liked the attention.

“Her name’s Princess Leia.” Logan shut the front door and walked over to them. The fondness on his face made Patton hurt.

Cara paused to grin up at Logan. “You’re such a nerd, Lo.”

Logan rolled his eyes, but his smile proved that he wasn’t really annoyed. “I wasn’t the one that named her.”

“What do you --?” She cut herself off as she saw the twins walk out. They stopped dead in their tracks once they saw her. The three all stared at each other with wide eyes.

“Cara, these are my sons, Roman and Virgil,” Logan started. “Roman and Virgil, this is Cara, the guest I said would be joining us.”

“Hi,” Roman mumbled. Virgil gave a timid wave.

Cara didn’t say anything for a moment. She stood up, tears fresh in her eyes, and turned to Logan. “You've grown up so much, Logan. I can’t believe I missed it.”

“Maybe this time you should stick around.” He gave her a gentle smile.

She turned back toward the twins with a wobbly smile of her own. “I think I will.”

Patton didn’t know how to feel about that.

At dinner, they all chatted about pleasant things. Roman and Virgil started to warm up to her (another thing she did better than Patton) and would ask her questions every once in a while. Patton pretended to be engaged in the conversation, but he didn’t speak much. He observed instead. Logan kept his eyes on her the whole time. He would smile when she spoke, laughed when she laughed. He was captivated by her.

And Patton was bitter about it. It didn’t seem fair. It wasn’t right. What did she ever do to get that attention? What made her so special? She wasn’t the one who married Logan. Who gave her the right to waltz in here and -- oh. Oh, God. Is this how Logan felt? This awful, squirming feeling sitting deep in his chest? Did Patton put Logan through this? Oh no. Logan wouldn’t... He wouldn’t get back at Patton, right?

“Oh, crap,” Patton muttered under his breath. He covered his mouth and stared hard at his plate.

Logan seemed to be the only one who noticed. He furrowed his brows in confusion (and what might have been worry). He didn’t get to speak any of his thoughts, however, because Virgil’s timid voice spoke up before he could.

“Are you a mermaid?” He asked Cara.

Cara beamed at him.

“What? No way,” Roman interrupted. “She’s obviously a princess. She has a pretty dress on and everything.”

“But her hair looks like a mermaid’s,” Virgil argued.

“How d’you know I’m not both?” Cara spoke before the two could start arguing.

“‘Cause mermaids aren’t real,” Roman stated matter-of-factly. Ah, yes, this was Logan’s kid alright.

Cara smirked. “What makes you so sure?”

“I’ve never seen one.”

“Well have you looked?”

Roman was prepared to answer when realization crossed his face. “Uh, no.”

“So then they could be real.” She winked at Logan. “You’ve just never had the pleasure of meeting one.” She grinned. “Until now, at least.”

“See?” Virgil’s timid voice gained a fraction of proud confidence.

Roman pouted. “But then where’s your tail? How can you be a mermaid with no tail?”

“Haven’t you seen The Little Mermaid?”

“Yeah -- but she lost her voice.” Roman crossed his arms.

“Well, I had to make a different deal.” Cara leaned over the table as if she was about to reveal a great secret. “In order to get my legs, I need to perform wherever the Sea Witch tells me. If I want to keep them, I have to find someone very special.”

“Like a prince?” Roman and Virgil asked at the same time.

Cara chuckled. “Something like that.”

“Daddy can be your prince,” Roman suggested.

Logan choked on his water.

“So you can keep your legs,” Virgil continued.

Patton noticed how Cara’s cheeks shifted to a soft pink. “You really think your daddy could be a prince?” She turned to Logan with soft eyes. It made Patton’s heart lurch. “I don’t know. He doesn’t seem very princely to me.”

“Nuh-uh. He could totally be a prince,” Roman argued.

Logan sunk in embarrassment as the three tried to discuss what did and did not make him a prince.

Patton didn’t notice how Cara tried to persuade the twins into thinking Logan wasn’t her prince. He was too focused on how the twins were so eager to get Logan with someone else. They jumped at the opportunity to give Cara her prince -- their own father. As if Patton didn’t matter. As if Patton wasn’t still sitting at the table with them.

Cara couldn’t just come back into Logan’s life and expect him to go along with her. She couldn’t think he would leave for her. Because he wouldn’t.... right? No. No, he wouldn’t. Logan promised he would stay. Maybe not for Patton, but for the twins. Logan always kept his promises.

Though Patton couldn’t stop the icky feeling from growing. After all, Logan probably thought Patton wouldn’t ever do what he did. And look what that got him.

“Alright,” Cara conceded with a laugh. “You’ve convinced me. Your daddy’s a prince.”

The twins high-fived each other.

“Thank God that’s over,” Logan mumbled. His face was bright red.

“Aw, c’mon, Lo-bear.” Cara playfully pushed his shoulder. “You’re a prince now. You gotta lighten up.”

“And she’s your princess,” Roman added.

Both Cara and Logan sputtered, but neither could come up with an appropriate response. Patton didn’t know how much more pain his heart could take.

After dinner, the twins insisted that Cara stick around. They liked her. They even showed her their room as Patton and Logan cleaned up the table. The merriment coming from all three of them was wholesome. Patton knew he should enjoy it, Roman and Virgil had such a hard time making friends, but he couldn’t get himself to see the silver lining. There was no other way of putting this; he was jealous.

Cara was charismatic and sweet and considerate. She knew her way with kids. She got the two most nervous eleven-year-olds Patton had ever met to like her within a few minutes. They trusted her faster than they ever trusted Patton -- than they ever trusted Logan. And it made him livid. She was perfect. She was better than Patton in every way -- why wouldn’t Logan want to go with her? It was clear even he trusted her more than Patton.

“Are you alright?” Logan cut through Patton’s unhappy thoughts.

“Never better.” Tone down the hostility. “Why?”

“Well, I just think that if you scrub that plate any harder, you might snap it in half.”

Patton stopped to process that he still had a plate in his hands and that said plate had long since been cleaned off.

“You are... okay, aren’t you?” Logan kept his eyes trained on the plate. “You’ve been a little off all day.”

Patton made a mental note of the distance between them. Of how quiet Logan’s voice was. Of how timid he sounded. A realization sparked in the back of his head. “Yeah, uh,” he deliberately put emphasis on setting the plate on the rack to dry, “sorry. I guess I’ve just kinda been spacey.”

Before either of them could say any more, Roman came running in with Leia hot on his heels. “Dad. Daddy.” He bounced in excitement. “Look! Now Cara’s really a princess.” Then in walked Virgil leading Cara by the hand. She had a large grin on her face and a makeshift crown on her head.

“A mermaid princess,” Virgil corrected quietly.

“Yes. That is my full and proper title. Mermaid Princess Cara.” She seemed to be having a lot of fun. “But I don’t think I’m the only royalty here, am I?”

Roman gasped. “Daddy needs a crown, too!”

“What?” Logan gaped at them. Cara stuck her tongue out. “No, wait --”

“C’mon, Vee.” He retreated back to the hall. Leia, tail swishing, followed him without hesitation.

Virgil paused. He looked up at Cara as if asking for permission, to which she gave him a smile. He returned it and let go of her hand to follow Roman.

Cara waited until they were out of sight before squealing. “They’re so cute!” She clasped her hands together like she prepared to beg. “Can I please have them?”

“No,” the word was out of Logan’s mouth before Patton could comprehend the question. “Get your own.”

She groaned dramatically and dropped her hands. “You never let me take the easy route.”

The twins forced Logan to wear his crown. Cara didn’t help his situation, either. She plopped it on his head with a satisfied grin. By the orders of Roman and Virgil Calon-Sanders, he wasn’t allowed to take it off until she left. And he was bound to listen to them or suffer their wrath.

Under normal circumstances, Patton would have found their shenanigans to be quite cute -- they often were -- but that awful, squirming feeling wouldn’t leave him alone. All he could think about was Logan realizing the person he and the twins deserved was Cara. The person Patton had stolen them from. Logan couldn’t possibly love Patton enough to stay even when someone better was right in front of him. Not after everything Patton had done. (And Logan's drunken confession didn’t instill confidence.) It was only a matter of time.

Roman decided to bring out Uno. It was an excuse to get Cara to stay longer. A clever one, but an excuse nonetheless. He knew she was only coming for dinner, so he had to give her a reason to stay. And Cara would take any excuse she could get. They moved into the living room and used the coffee table.

Patton decided to play with them, but he didn’t pay much attention. No one seemed to notice. They joked, and threatened each other, and had a good time without any of his input. He might as well not have been there at all. He knew he could change that. He could say something -- take part in their jokes -- but he couldn’t open his mouth. There was a chance he could ruin this, and that was the last thing he wanted to do. Did he feel like the fifth wheel in his own home? Sure, but that didn’t mean he wanted to ruin his family’s fun. They deserved to have a good time even if it meant he wasn’t involved.

“You’re cheating!” Cara threw down her cards on the table. She had a full hand. Leia, who was sitting on her lap, looked up at her in offense. “I swear you’re cheating. There’s no possible way you can win so many rounds.”

Logan shrugged, a sly smirk on his face. “If you think so.”

“Daddy and Virgil always win at Uno,” Roman said. He set down his five cards. “I think they do some kind of magic.”

“I think so, too, Roman.” Cara pointed between Virgil and Logan. “Witches. The both of you.”

Virgil giggled, hiding his mouth behind the two cards he had left.

“One more round. And if either of you two win, I’m taking your dog.”

The round that ensued was one of the more intense ones of the night. Patton decided to be an observer for this one -- which turned out to be a good thing. Cara almost cussed out Logan twice for teaming up with Virgil and giving her plus eight cards. She and Roman were determined to not let them win, but their skills and luck did not amount to the tag team of the reigning Uno champions. After a long-fought battle, Virgil won with Roman in a close second.

“Alright, that’s it.” Cara dropped her absurd amount of cards. “Come on, Princess Leia, you’re my compensation for the night.”

Roman and Virgil tried stopping her before she could get up. They held onto each of her arms and spoke over each other to get her to listen to reason.

“Okay, okay. You can keep her.” She ruffled their hair when they released her arms. “But I gotta get going. I have boring adult things to do tomorrow.”

“Can’t you just spend the night?” Roman pouted.

Cara smiled. “Maybe some other time.” She gave him a hug, then one to Virgil. “It was fun meeting you two. We have to hang out more while I’m still in town. The Sea Witch is making me go across the country in two weeks. Then I’ll be stuck in Seattle for a while.”

“You should tell the Sea Witch you found your prince,” Virgil suggested. He was still hugging her side.

“I should, shouldn’t I?” She smiled at Logan. “We stopped believing I’d ever see him again.” She sighed and gave Virgil one last squeeze before standing up. Leia circled around her feet. “Thank you both for the crown. Thank you, Patton, for allowing me into your lovely home. It was nice getting to know who my favorite nerd fell in love with.”

Patton waved at her from the floor. “Thanks for coming.”

“Bye, Cara.” The twins waved at her.

Logan walked her to the door. “I’m glad we got to spend time together again. Even though you’re as annoying as ever and turned my own sons against me.” He opened it for her.

She scoffed, stepping out. “Shut up. You love me.”

“That’s nothing you can prove.”

She smiled, her eyes shining from all the emotion rushing through her. She leaned up to place a soft kiss on Logan’s cheek. “Until next time, my little worker bee.”

Patton shoved the Uno cards back in the box.

Logan closed the door with a soft smile. The tips of his ears were pink. He erased the look to go into serious dad mode. “It’s time for bed, you two.”

Roman and Virgil tried to put up a fight right away. “We’re not even tired,” Roman complained.

“It’s very late. You have to sleep now or you’re never going to get out of bed tomorrow.” He took his crown and placed it on Roman’s head. “Whoever gets ready first gets to choose what book we read tonight.”

Now that they were older, Logan only ever read to them to get them to sleep at a normal time. Patton was sure they would figure it out soon, but when it was always framed like a reward, their competitive nature would stop them from seeing it faster.

Virgil shot to his feet. “A Series of Unfortunate Events!” He ran down the hall.

“What? No!” Roman chased after him. “We haven’t finished The Girl Who Could Fly!” Leia followed, almost tripping over her own feet in her excitement.

Logan smiled a little.

In record time, the twins got ready for bed. Roman beat Virgil by mere seconds despite Virgil’s head start. Logan picked out The Girl Who Could Fly from their bookshelf. They all converged on Virgil’s bed -- even Leia joined them. She laid down at their feet, prepared to sleep. The twins were on either side of Logan, their heads resting on his shoulders. He opened the book to where they left off.

Patton decided to get ready for bed himself while this went on. It was pretty late and he was exhausted from all the mental gymnastics. If he had to keep thinking about Cara he would either start sobbing or consider manslaughter. Maybe both. Multi-task.

He was sitting on the bed when Logan came in. They didn’t say anything to each other at first, and Patton pretended to be interested in his phone.

“So are you going to tell me what’s going on with you?”

Patton shot his eyes up. Logan stood with his arms crossed, wearing one of Patton’s old t-shirts. It was common for him to steal shirts for pajamas. Patton never minded. It was always cute to see how big they were on him. “What are you talking about?”

“You’ve been acting weird all day.” He sat on his side of the bed.

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“Patton.” He gave him a look. “You promised me.”

Patton drummed his fingers on the back of his phone. He did promise. “Okay,” he sighed, “I’m... I’m sort of a little...” Why was this so hard? “Seeing how you interacted with Cara made me realize my own shortcomings. She knows how to make you laugh, you smile just by looking at her -- and she’s amazing with the boys. It’s almost like you all were made for each other.”

Logan studied his face. “Are you... are you jealous of Cara?”

“It sounds silly when you say it out loud.”

Then the unexpected happened. Logan laughed. A short, little sound hidden behind his hand.

Patton blinked. His brain took a second to process that Logan was laughing at him. “Are you going to laugh every time I open up to you?” He was more shocked than offended.

“No. Sorry -- I’m sorry.” He waved his hand, but the smile stayed on his face. “It’s just... Patton, Cara is like my sister. She’s always been that way. I love her the same way I love Thomas. Speaking of,” he looked away thoughtfully, “he’s probably going to scream when I tell him Cara’s in town.”

“So you don’t have the hots for her?”

Logan snorted, smiling like it was the most ridiculous thing he ever heard. “If I ‘have the hots’ for anyone, it’s you.” He cupped Patton’s cheek and gave him a slow, sweet kiss. “You’re never getting rid of me. And that’s a threat.”

“Oh, thank God.” He leaned into Logan’s hand. “But I’m not gonna lie, I’m probably still going to be a little jealous.”

“Guess that means you just have to spend more time with her.” He smirked. “I’ll set you two some playdates in the future. She’s a biter, though.” He took his hand back and laid down, curling up in his blankets. “Okay, goodnight.”

“Wait -- you can’t just say that and then --”

“Sorry, I’m sleeping.”

Patton sighed and flopped back in bed. Well, at least he knew how Logan felt. A tiny smile sprouted on his lips when he looked at the little ball next to him. Maybe this whole being open thing wouldn’t be as bad as he thought.

~~~

@actitus-hypoleucos

[fanficobsess3d]

period headcanons

wow I can’t believe I haven’t put out an anime fic yet, damn I really AM behind

this is my first headcanon for ~the boys~ so bear with me, but I just know that these are all fucking canon and yall can @ me 

Also, I’m a little bitch on my period - I’m on it now and lemme just say BOY - so I’m basing this off of my experiences. I have heavy, painful, and emotional periods so….. if you cannot relate just enjoy what could be from the boys of class 1-A

Bakugo

He’s one of the only boys that will know what the fuck is going on with you

His mom is hella loud so it’s obvious that she’d educate her son on it

He may be a prideful asshole, but he was taught to be respectful and educated

He’s also not the type of guy to whine

So be prepared to hear a lot of insults when you whine

“oH mY FuKinh GOODDDDD!!!!” 

“You are so annoying! I don’t sound like that!” 

“Well, I’m so fucking sorry princess, I hate to break it to you, but you do fucking sound like that with your constant bitching!” 

Yeah he highkey roasts you every single time you wanna start whining

But don’t be mistaken, the second you really start to feel the pain he’s genuinely worried

There have been a few times you’ve gotten really bad

You typically start feeling nauseous all day and don’t eat

So you collapse

Curled into a ball on the floor, groaning and moaning

The girls had been with you and hissed with sympathy, but you could already hear Bakugo yelling from the hall

“WhAT THE FUCKKK!”

He instantly scoops you up to hide in a classroom away from everybody 

Setting you on the desk, you can see the worry in his eyes

He knew how you got when you were hit with the monthly hellfire rain waterfall 

So he was prepared for this

But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t get mad about it

“Jesus fucking CHRIST Y/N!” 

“‘M sorry, Katsuki….” 

You were playing with your thumbs as he lightly knocked against your head with his knuckles with a scoff

“You need to take better care of yourself, dumbass. I feel like my hair’s gonna go gray every damn time you fucking collapse like that.”

“I tried! I felt like I was gonna get sick this morning! And the pain pills don’t work anymore!”

“Then we’ll fucking skip. Next time, don’t wait to tell me that it’s gotten that bad as you fall like a fucking idiot on the goddamn floor. Dumbass.”

You let a small smile slip onto your face

You knew that he had his own way of showing affection, so you couldn’t help it every time he went even the tiniest bit soft on you 

You guys normally skip class after that

You sneak into your dorm to cuddle in your bed with your fuzzy blankets

And yeah you don’t forget the heating pad -- you have Bakugo: the human heater

He keeps a close eye on you the rest of the night, making sure you eat and pumping you full of pain meds to try and keep the pain at bay 

But god FORBID you start crying

He is not the most emotional person so the second you start crying he’s like um

He just curls his hand around the back of your head and pushes your head into his chest

Letting his head fall into the crook of your shoulder as your sobs die down

“God, you’re so fucking dramatic, babe.”

“Shut up! The cat was fucking cute okay?!” 

But he’s still there whenever you need something

Ask him to get stuff from the store for you and yeah he’ll do it

Prepare for the whining and groaning about it though

He’ll literally be on the phone with you the entire time just so he can be petty and grumble about it

But he’ll never admit that seeing you so distressed every month is more scary and stress inducing than literally everything else in his life

Because you’ve become his life 

Not that he’ll tell you that 

As for the sex part, I feel like he’ll only do something if you really ask for it or if you’re pissing him off

He’s a complete control freak, so if you think for a second that he’s gonna let you off after your attitude earlier….

Boyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy you’re IN FOR IT

But he knows how much pain you might be in so he’s only gonna do it if the mood’s right 

Otherwise he’s not gonna put any of him near any part of you because he accidentally read the situation wrong once and you freaked and then cried because you told him no 

Yeah, that was a fun conversation

Bakugo was pissed when he found out the background about that answer

But if you are up to it, yeah y’all are going like seven rounds I SWEAR

That boy has the stamina of a fucking rabbit 

Todoroki

This is also the only other guy who’s gonna know about uterus period stuff because of his sister

Yeah, he doesn’t know the specifics as much as Bakugo

But he’s aware of what’s happening 

Honestly I feel like he’s one of the best ones to be around on your period tbh

Yeah, he’s quiet, but that makes your life much much easier when all you want to do is cry and scream at people all day

The second you get mad at something, he gives you that look 

Everything will be fine, calm down 

And it’s like everything is fine 

You also know that he’ll be a little petty bitch if you decide to get mad at him about something

But then you’ll start crying because you didn’t mean to get mad at him and he’ll just smile at you because he knows that you genuinely do feel bad

As for the cramps, he’s already prepared

The second your period hits he just…. Knows 

He knows you so well that he can instantly feel when your personality starts to change

So not even a period later he’s shoving chocolate and a teddy bear with a cute picture of you two, in your face

He does get really worried when the cramps get really bad though

Pain meds don’t really work on you, so the only thing that he can do is massage you with his left side

He knows that the heat helps so anytime your face contorts and your mouth lets out a grunt of pain he’s instantly massaging your stomach or back 

My fatass cANNOT relate but N E WAYS

He’s not as dramatic as Bakugo but yeah, he does get really worried

He gets quieter than usual, if that’s even possible, and he never leaves your side

But that’s more for him than you since he knows that you get so caught up that you forget to take care of yourself sometimes

And he worries about you all of the time

Be prepared for a look if you start whining, though

He’s not really used to that

so if you start taking the immature route

whether because you feel bad or because you want to piss him off

Get ready for intimidating Todo 

He kind of looks at you like you need to remember who you’re talking to.

But he does understand that there are some days when every little thing gets to you

So he’s always prepared to listen

“Why is it that I’m the only person on this planet who suffers!???? I swear to gooddddd my uterus is about to fuckING EXPLODE!!! AND THERE’S NOTHING I CAN DO ABOUT ITTTT! AAAAAA!” 

“Baby-”

“Oh my god!!! You called me baby!” suddenly you’re bawling again 

He picks you up and sets you in his lap, letting you latch onto his shoulders and neck 

I highkey feel like he’s one of the guys who’d try and help by sex ngl

Like if you’re in his lap for longer than a second

Oop you’re getting it

It’s inevitable 

You really don’t mind tho cause BOY is an orgasm on your period fucking hEAVEN

Shoto’s also a switch so like

Since you’re such a goddamn sub baby on your period, what he says goes

the second you throw a fit, BOOM you’re gettin fucked

he’d prefer if you cry over an orgasm than a shitty dog commercial and that’s the tea on that

Izuku

Little baby over here has no fucking idea what a period is 

he was never really around girls much, so he never really learned

not to mention that schools barely cover it as it is 

He knows it involves blood

He knows it involves your parts????

…. and yeah, that’s pretty much it 

So the second you start complaining about it he gets all blushy and confused

You didn’t have time to explain, so the rest of the day was an adventure for him to try and figure it out

He gets instantly focused

He starts murmuring weird theories and writing down weird stuff as the day goes on

Noticing your weird habits and how you seemed to act like Kacchan

You became impulsive and you cried like four times before the first class ended

Not to mention how many arguments you got into

he was convinced for a wholeass solid period that a demon had literally possessed you

He was very, very, confused

But he wanted to find out why you were like that 

Later on, you sat him down and explained everything 

Granted, he blushed like a little school boy and it was an awkward conversation on his part

But you were irritated because it was so annoying to have to explain it to every boy ever 

but you were just glad that he was respectful about it

He felt bad that you had to sit down and explain something so normal and commonplace to him

then you felt bad because you didn’t mean to be mean to him 

or make him feel bad

Yeah, you started crying again

But now he understands everything and he feels, like, really bad

He doesn’t get why it’s the girls that have to suffer through everything

he also doesn’t understand why nobody pushed for more education about it 

he now understand more of the stigma around women and he feels really bad about that because he genuinely had no idea

And wow you gave him a pat on the back after that came out of his mouth

That got him so lovely bonus points

But he has that glint in his eye that you know very well, and you instantly sweat drop as he begins to mutter ideas to himself 

The next morning you show up to class and he instantly greets you with a hug and chocolate and very cooey gooey words that made Bakugo gag at his desk 

Later on that night, he makes you guys the comfiest blanket fort and sets up a bunch of movies to watch

Every time you cry he borderline cries himself, hugging you to his chest and wrapping you guys with the blankets

Every time you are in serious pain he feels really bad and hovers over you like a mother hen 

One time you collapsed and he instantly picked you up and ran to Recovery Girl in the health center

He genuinely thought you had died or something

But no, the cramps made you nauseous and you didn’t eat so your iron levels dropped really low and you passed out

He instantly freaked and kept shoving food in your mouth for the rest of the week

Now for the sex part 

You were in pain more often than not, so it was a bad idea for anything sexual to happen 

But yeah, you got horny on your period like, half of the time

Somehow the topic of period sex was brought up between you and Izuku and he had no idea that that was a thing 

The look on his face when he realized it was probably the funniest fucking thing ever 

His eyes bulged out of his head like those weird animal pens 

But he actually thought about it and literally a look at you would have you pouncing on him 

It was 50/50 on whether you’d be in the mood, though

Sometimes you just wanted to fuck

Sometimes you wanted to suck his dick until he cried

Other times you just wanted to cuddle his chest 

and, yeah, sometimes you wanted to throw a plate at a wall

honestly i felt that 

After the first time you’d had a successful sexual encounter on your period

You wished him luck on trying to figure out when to do each 

He just looked at you with wide eyes

“Yeah, I’ll just warn you now, because of how wacky my emotions are, if you tried anything like what we just did and I was not in the mood, my uterus would’ve had a royal fit.”

“What do you mean?” he looked at you cautiously

You turned to him, your eyes a dark glint, “I mean, if I’m not in the mood for sex, I’m either going suck you, cry, or punch you. Good luck figuring out when I wanna do each one.” 

He looked at how close you were in proximity and promptly scooted back a few inches, almost falling off of the bed

But you grabbed his arm and yanked him back until he was pushed into your neck 

“Yeah, also you can’t stop cuddling me until I say so, either.”

“... so as long as I do what you ask you won’t kill me, right?”

you had to giggle at that, he was just so naive at times

you hadn’t meant to come off so intimidating, because you were really happen that he was nice enough to take care of you like t

a lot of boyfriends you’d had in the past had been real assholes about it

“H-hey this is serious! How can I take care of you if i’m dead?!?!” 

you turned to look at him 

“That’s your only concern?” there was weird glint in your eye

“... am I supposed to be worried about something else?”

yeah, you jumped him again

[e-luxion]

Why I think Johnny Suh’s Rising is...

Scorpio.

I don’t know why I had the need to make a whole damn post about it but I am cos I feel strongly about it, and I welcome people to come argue with me about this. ok that sounded semi-threatening, it wasn’t I promise. Please do interact and share your opinions, I love to hear them!! This is a completely useless post but here you go. Also, I didn’t go in too much depth in some placement and kind of kept things a bit superficial and did not talk about every single placement that he would have. 

First of all,

the way he just looks makes me nervous. That’s all. 

Let’s look at the basics of having a Scorpio Ascendant:

The most prominent thing about Scorpio risings are their eyes. 

They are usually piercing, intense and it stands out. Another thing that is common with Scorpio Risings is having “bedroom eyes” and/or “tired looking eyes”* 

Sharp looking profile. I am not going to talk too much about actual physical appearance of risings cos I think it is more complicated than that, like there is a lot that goes into it. But i can make a post about it if requested ;)

Even if the person is outgoing, they are very observant and really good at “reading the room”, and just picking up emotions 

Scorpio Risings are the mfs who just stare at people, they make intense eye contact for like no reason (whether is conscious or unconscious it depends on the person but in Johnny’s case, he 100% does it on purpose, does no one else remember that time he said he makes direct eye contact with people on purpose to make them nervous/uncomfortable??? (that's peak Scorpio AC culture right there) 

Very strong-willed individuals who can overcome a lot of hardship

Values privacy a lot and absolute kings of keeping secrets 

Scorpio Risings also have a magic way of making everyone open up their secrets to them. You probably won’t even realise, they just have that vibe that makes you open up

s a r c a s t i c

it does not matter who you are, what you are, what you’re into. Everyone is attracted to Scorpio Risings and you want to f**k them. I don’t make the rules, we just have that power. You can hate them or love them but you cannot help but be attracted to them. 

also fun fact for y’all, most celebrities have fixed sign risings (Taurus, Scorpio, Leo and Aquarius)

*reminds me of this one thing I saw on twitter once about how he hated when people asked him if he was tired when he wasn’t because he has a natural “sleepy” look or something along those lines

Now onto the fun part, looking at how his chart would look like if he had a Scorpio AC and why it somehow makes sense:

Leo Midheaven: For those of you who might get Leo vibes from Johnny, this might be why. The Midheaven is your “public persona”, the person your co-workers see and strangers see in public/work settings, and well Johnny’s job is being an idol so that is why he might act more like his Midheaven at first glance, and with his Mars also being in Leo, I believe it only heightens this. So Leo Midheaven is a midheaven that you’ll often find amongst performers/entertainers/singers/actors because people with this placement tend to be insanely charismatic, charming, creative and natural leaders. They also come across super confident, in their place of work they are loud and full of pride, you’ll just notice them no matter what. Naturally, they have a talent to inspire others, and sort of have a regal quality to them. The only thing bigger than their ego is their heart (very kind people), but it is their ego that helps them get far ahead in life, they’re also very ambtious and because they are so ambitious, they only aim for the best of the best (i.e. being famous). Great at storytelling, presenting, acting and possess an insanely creative mind, at the end of the day they just want to be seen. Seriously, Leo MCs seem to be those people that were just born to shine, they stand out wherever they go. 

Sagittarius on the 2nd house cusp: Lucky with finances and doesn’t worry much about money or their belongs (not @ Johnny throwing his fucking iPhone like it costs $5), even if you grew up poor (which he obviously didn't, he is a middle-class suburb lil bitch and it shows) you don’t worry too much about money. For some people, it seems like you spend your money a bit recklessly and just buy shit, and like to spend your money on experiences and travelling. Fun fact, I also have this placement I can confirm all of these are FACTS and I- mmm i dont want to talk about my spending habits cos yikes :) 

Pisces on the 5th house cusp: Two words: hopeless romantics. To the point where it’s slightly unrealistic, but that’s a different story. They really want the whole fairytale, the glass slipper and the spotting someone in a crowd and falling madly in love kind of thing. But also they express their love in a selfless, unconditional way, these are the kinds of people who love blindly and accept all your flaws. Can be very sentimental.

Cancer on the 9th house cusp: With this placement others have an affinity for you as an authority figure who has a strong nurturing or protective feel, very supporting and encouraging. It can be an indicator for moving away from the place where you grew up and finding comfort in foreign places. People with this placement also find it easier to adapt to different cultures. 

Virgo on the 11th house cusp: The helpful friend, looks out for everyone, they will always be there for you and great at giving advice. The type that remembers the little things, truly the parent friend cos they look out for you and the kind of person you usually love spending time with and make plans with. Actually only has a few *close* friends.

Sun in the 3rd: People with this placement are usually known for their intelligence and way with words. Sun in the 3rd house people hate to be bored and are always willing to try new things and experience new things (they also adapt very well to any situation), they’re also pretty light-hearted with a great sense of humor and can be mischievous. It also really balances the fixedness of his Aquarius sun. With the 3rd house of communication falling in the Sun, it gives the person a lot of confidence in their speech and pride in their communication skills. It is also said that people with this placement travel/move around a lot. Friendship, and again communication, is very important to them, they make friends easily and have a way of relating to others, also very open-minded. 

Moon in the 7th: This is definitely a people-oriented kind of placement, their emotional security is achieved through others, they have a strong need to be around people. (some astrologers also say that these people are the kind to always be in a relationship of some kind, it doesn’t necessarily mean an official “relationship” but A relationship, be it platonic, romantic/committed or literally just casual dating but they need to be with someone because they hate to be alone = feel unstable without someone) These are also the kind of people who fulfill their emotional needs per se through others, so by making others happy. 

Mercury in the 3rd: This is honestly such a perfect placement for Mercury, since it falls in its natural ruling house so the planet feels comfortable with this, especially being in an air sign (Aquarius). One of things that Johnny is known for is his “communication” skills, hence why he has a whole YT series: JCC or Johnny’s Communication Centre so this placement is the one that makes the most sense. Mercury in the 3rd house just boosts everything that Mercury represents, it might make someone have a short attention span or get bored easily but they pick up on things very easily, they are very good at multi-tasking and have a very active mind. They are usually the type that know a bit of everything, always have fun facts for you and can have a conversation in literally any topic with anyone, somehow know everyone and are friends with everyone, natural charmers. They LOVE to talk and talk a lot, they excel at any form of communication or writing, this reminds me of two things: (1) The translator at the Mexico concert said that Johnny asks a lot of questions, is very curious and excited to learn (spanish) and also talks A LOT. (2) I heard somewhere that Johnny was in a debating club in school. To sum up Mercury in the 3rd, are great at talking, communication comes easy to them and are huge social butterflies, a good sense of humour, very curious like a child and also like books. boom, jOhnny. 

Also to expand on this communication talk: He’d also have Capricorn in the 3rd house, which usually makes someone careful, these are the kind of people that think before they talk and unless they know what they are talking about, they shut tf up. Their voice can sound quite intimidating and authoritarian, but there is something comforting about it. Also tends to make someone very sarcastic, their humor is a bit dry, very dead-pan, the type to make jokes with a serious face and expect you to get it? Also tOO mANy dad jokes. 

Venus in the 2nd: Another Mr. Romantic placement that just fits Johnny way more than I want to admit. People with this placement are big old-timey romantic, they don’t fall in love easily but when they do they do fall hard and are completely head over heels, even if they don’t “fall in love easily” they secretly just want to be in love. They live for the pleasure, the romance and the beauty of it all. The type to send you a 100 roses with a card saying “to my one and only, from your one and only”, or buy you a huge teddy bear that smells like him, do the whole wine & dine you, picnic at a park and then take photos of you. It really isn’t about the huge romantic gestures, rather the small and cute ones, it’s about making memories and creating mementos, but also about the cheesy yet classy romance. They can also be super touchy, very physical. Another thing about them is that they really like to buy people stuff, and shower people with material things, it’s (one of) their love languages I guess. I can’t remember right but I am pretty sure I heard somewhere Johnny always buys members shit, like he just buys them stuff all the time. 

Mars in the 9th: I said I wasn’t going to talk too much about appearance here, but more energy/vibe instead but I can tell you this much, legend goes that people with Mars in the 9th either have a thing for thighs or have t h i c c thighs* or both so.... Very experimental people, lighthearted yet passionate, really turned on by languages and laughter/smiling. This is the kind of person that will debate anything to do with beliefs, and if you question their beliefs they’ll be like “:) :) :) ok cool ur opinion is valid, everyone has their own opinion :) :) :) except urs sucks :)” you know they secretly love intellectual fights, cos they’re opinionated as hell and have strong opinions, they’re super straight-forward and open-minded (regardless of the fact that they have very strong opinions) and are always willing to learn. Not the best at sugar coating things, kind of blunt whilst still remaining kind and humorous. But since his Mars is in Retrograde, the more aggressive sides of his mars will be very internalized. But their desire in life is to spread joy and laughter, they are very good at making others laugh and being playful.  Fun fact: people with this placement tend to move is a very bouncy kind of way, very clumsy. Another fun fact: I heard once that people with this placement may or may not have a teacher kink, and a sex abroad/while traveling kink, also having sex outside. 

*skip to 5:26

Jupiter in the 1st: First of all, I have seen a few Nctzen-astrologers type Johnny as a Sagittarius rising and this would be my explanation for that. Having Jupiter in the 1st will give you similar features and energy as a Sagittarius rising, people with this placement tend to have a larger than life presence, your presence is felt before you even walk into a room. Planets in the 1st house kind of go in pair with your rising (because well, it falls on that house duh) so it has a huge influence on how you carry yourself, how you present yourself at first sight, the kind of vibe that you give off and with Jupiter falling on your first house you just exude this optimism, enthusiasm and honestly? Just happiness and positivity. Also people with this placement tend to have big smiles and a large bone structure, Jupiter is the planet of expansion so it makes “bigger” everything that it touches so in the first house it will make your physical features “bigger”: big smiles, soft cheeks, thicc body, etc. This placement also makes people have a certain child-like quality, a permanent youthfulness because of the way they carry themselves (positive vibes y’all), they are also very driven and persistent people, with this fire inside that makes them succeed in anything they set their mind to, maybe it is because of this blind optimism that they eventually succeed. I don’t even have to go on about how this fits with Johnny because I think it speaks for itself. 

Saturn in the 4th: out of the many things Saturn represents, your fears is one of them, in the fourth house there could be a fear of losing family, also fear of being unloved (even if you are a very loved person, it is always in the back of your mind), also a fear of not being safe, and not belonging. Belonging might be quite important to him and above all, with this placement: family is taken seriously. People with this aspect value family a lot, and feel responsible for their family. And I think anyone that stans NCT can agree that Johnny definitely seems to take family quite seriously. 

Pluto in the 1st: LMAO ok so Pluto in the 1st, is one of the most intimidating placement a person can have. Even if you are the biggest cinnamon bun in the planet, people will be intimidated by you and lowkey scared of you at first glance. You will just naturally give off major alpha intense vibes, no matter what you do. This truly contradicts his (possible/hypothetical) Jupiter in the 1st, I can see it creating this extreme duality (that is very Johnny ngl) of being this intimidating ass man but also being a ray of sunshine that literally oozes positivity. With Pluto in the 1st, you also tend to rub people... a special way. When you have this placement in your natal chart, people either hate you or love you, there is no in-between whatsoever, but regardless of that everyone wants to f*ck you and if they say they don’t, they are lying to themselves. People with this placement tend to be insanely magnetic and people tend to be attracted to them, if they are in a room, you’ll notice them for sure cos their aura is just so intense. QWLL SHAPED LIPS 

I’d like to add this here to back up my theory: How Yuta said Johnny was the scariest hyung, and they all fucking agreed and Ten SHOOK his hand like “finally someone said it, that bitch is terrifying” and then there was that time (I couldn’t find it sorry) where Doyoung said that they were all watching a horror movie and everyone kept chatting and Johnny was like all of you shut up and Doyoung said that in that moment Johnny was scarier/more intimidating than the horror movie. Also, I have this theory that idols show probably would show their rising signs more in airports, cos you know they are just walking, minding their business with their “external self” faces on so I can see how their AC would show more in those situations. And like have you seen Johnny walking around in airports? That tall bitch is intimidating as hell, he has that stare and bitch face down to a T and then I remember he has the personality of a teddy bear and I am like ???????? how 

Note: for him to have these placements he’d have to be born at around 0:30 am. 

so HMU if you want me to do other members and I’ll do some research about it and do a post like that. I am not sure about some of the other members but I do feel strongly about Lucas, maybe Ten, maybe Taeyong (not too sure about him yet)

from your local hoe, Lulu xoxoxoxo

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #266

“... and buried deep beneath the waves, betrayed by family, to his nation with his last breath cried: beware the daughter of the sea.”

What's the last thing you looked up in the dictionary? Shit, it's right on the tip of my tongue... I was making sure I was using it right, which I was. Do you ever listen to instrumental music? Rarely, and if I do, it's normally game soundtracks. Who did you last sit on? I'm hoping you mean like... on their lap lmao in which case it'd probably be Jason. No one wants my fat ass to sit on their lap nowadays. What do you think about wind? I HATE wind, unless it's hot and there's a nice breeze. Has there been anyone that you wanted to get to know but never did? Well of course. That happened in high school a lot. What's the last thing you looked at that reminded you of someone? Teddy's picture on my shelf. Have your parents ever tried to commit suicide? Not that I know of. I couldn't even begin to imagine either of those trying that. Do you have a gag reflex? A VERY STRONG ONE. Would you rather have sex before you're married or wait till marriage? I don't care. Tbh by now, I kinda think before is wiser only to ensure you two are compatible in that area. It wouldn't matter to me personally, but I know that's important to some people and can cause issues and built-up bitterness. Just use protection, Christ. Have you ever let someone hit you? Um no? Do you have friends in other states/countries? Plenty. Been on the Internet since before I was even a pre-teen, talking to strangers lmao. Do you ever pay attention during church? I would try to back then, but I never succeeded well because my mind would wander out of boredom. Do you have self-control? That very much depends on the situation. I can be EXTREMELY impulsive, but in other cases hold it together. Have you ever broken a window? No. When was the last time you freaked someone out? I'm sure it was a few nights ago when I had another nightmare and woke up screaming. Mom always yells my name to snap me out of it. Have you ever gone on a date with a weirdo? No. Who's the last person you called a bitch? I don’t know. Is anyone in your family disabled? Yes. What do you want for Christmas? It's hella early to think about it, but I'm quite certain I'll be asking for a treadmill. How many moles do you have? I don't think I have any? Aren't freckles and moles different? Do you own any comic books? No. What is the nastiest dare you have ever committed? I don't know. I never did really nasty ones because I wasn't stupid. Do you know anyone who has been raped? Almost, anyway. Idk if I know anyone to really has been... I hope not. Are you an atheist? No. I think there's... something. Have you ever owned a goldfish? Well yeah, from like, carnival games and stuff. Who was the last person to call you beautiful? I dunno, probably a family member when I changed my FB profile picture. How many times have you been stung by a bee? Once. Those fuckin hornets better stay the holy fuck away from me. What was the last flavor of gum you chewed? Probably something fruity. When was the last time you used tape? Ummm probably when I had to tape the side of my laptop screen a bit. When was the last time you said fuck? A couple questions ago in this survey lmao. Have you ever stolen something? Only this pink crayon I thought was beautiful at Sunday school oof. Who would you like to kiss right now? Maaaan there's three people I would so long I wasn't involved with anyone else. Mark of course lol, Jason, or Sara. Who was the last person you told to 'Shut the fuck up' to? Ha ha, probably playfully to Sara. Why were you last nervous? So I joined this group on deviantART called the Guiding Light Project, which is about mental health help and positivity, and there is a list of people seeking help and what their problem is. I decided to reach out to two people I really thought I could help, and one was a guy. Men make me so nervous that I was very nervous sending him a message, but it's going very well. Whose pants did you last take off? Uhhhh. OH YEAH HEY when I was hanging out with Colleen and she got me to change her son's diaper. Hate hate hate hated it. I do not ever need kids. When was the last time you were disturbed? Hm. I'm sure over something I saw on Facebook. NO, WAIT. Sara, do not read this. When I was at Ashley's, we were watching Naked and Afraid, and they caught a chameleon to cook for food. I almost screamed. Poor thing looked terrified when the guy grabbed him. Why did you last feel awkward? Also when messaging that guy. When was the last time you got in a fight with your best friend? It's been a long time. Have you ever asked someone for a tampon? Only a friend. Who was the last person you read a book to? My niece had me read a book like fifty times. Who is the person you say the naughtiest things to? Ha ha, Sara when we're having our stupid fangirl moments. Who was the last person to send you a letter? Sara. It's still on my shelf. :') How do you feel about war? I’m a pacifist, so guess. Do you like cupcakes or muffins more? Hm, maybe cupcakes. Have you ever pushed someone on purpose? Yes. Have you ever slapped someone in the face? No. Do you have any tough life decisions to make soon? Nothing major. At what time of the day do you usually have the most energy? In the morning, once I've passed the drowsy phase. Magenta, aqua, or coral? Coral. Do you like the color orchid? Ye! Would you rather be a wedding photographer or a nature photographer? Uhhh I literally want to be both? I'm *realistically* more interested in shooting weddings for the income, but if I had my way, I'd be perfectly financially content being a nature photographer. Man, I hope that happens. Have you ever had an ulcer? No. Are you interested in health and wellness? "Rather than interests, I consider them two very important things I should always try to pay attention to. Health is very important." <<<< This. Would you ever be a fitness coach? HA no. Do you ever question whether something that makes you uncomfortable is a good thing or not? That's a very good question. This can definitely lead to you questioning flawed morals, so in that sense, it sure can be. In other ways though, it can certainly be a bad thing. Do you think for yourself? Yes. I am, generally, very opinionated and follow my gut instinct. Do you live life on your own terms, or do you do what everyone tells you to do? The former, usually. I can be AWFUL at making decisions though, so I definitely consider advice. What color is your bike? I don't have a bike. Are you due for a hike? There is physically no way I could handle a hike in my current shape. Muscle atrophy in the legs is not fuckin' fun, and with hyperhidrosis and THIS heat? Oh, hunny. Have you ever created a themed scrapbook? As a kid, I fainty remember having one? How often do you eat dessert? Very rarely. I don't need it. What's the trendiest item you own? Oh boy, I don't have a clue. I don't even know what's "trendy." Did you pull an all-nighter last night? No. When was the last time you wrote an essay? My first semester of this year. Do you enjoy writing essays? I actually do if it's a subject I'm passionate about. Do you enjoy learning? Yeah! What is your favorite fairytale? Fuckin fight me if you say Shrek isn't one. What is your favorite name that starts with a "Z"? I have no idea. Maybe Zena, though I prefer it with an "x." Have you ever felt like you were going to throw up while you were at school? Yes. I have before. Do you own a princess crown? No. When was the last time you were jealous of someone? Ugh... with how bad my PTSD has been lately, I've been having periodic episodes of raging hate and jealousy of the girl he dated after me, thinking things like, "what if he loved her more," "what if he also told her this or that," etc. They're not even together anymore, but my brain doesn't care. Do you know anyone with an eating disorder? Maybe? What was the last thing you killed? I think an earwig-ish thing. Whose number did you last get? The girl's who adopted Bentley. When was the last time you used a public bathroom? Probably not since an appointment with my psychiatrist some time ago. Have you ever used someone for money? Wow, no. Do you have manners? I honestly think I have great manners. Have you ever woken up and realized that yesterday really happened? That was ABSOLUTELY the day after the breakup. It didn't at all feel real when it was even happening. When was the last time that you had a pet that died? Last November is when we had to put Teddy to sleep. God, I miss that baby boy. Or did Mitsu die later? I don't recall for sure. Do you know anyone who retired at a young age? I mean, probably. I'm just unaware. When was the last time you took a taxi/Uber? Where were you going? Never, actually. We don't really have those here. Have you ever been diagnosed (by a professional) with OCD? Yes. Do you know any married gay couples? Distantly. Who is your favorite person to spend time with? SARA! I feel like kids having a sleepover when I've been with her. Is there anything you should tell someone, but don’t want to? Yes. Have you ever woken up somewhere and not known how you got there? I don't believe so. Do you live somewhere where recreational marijuana is legal? No. Have you ever quit a job with no notice? No. Do you have nightmares often? HA, it's just about a nightly basis now. Have you ever been on any sort of government assistance? I've gotten loans for school and stuff. Does that count? Did you have your own bedroom when you were growing up? No, I shared it with my little sister. Are you more optimistic or pessimistic? Pessimistic. Are you comfortable with your weight? Fuck no. How often do you listen to classic rock? Semi-frequently. Not as much as I did in high school. What about country? Just about never ever. Do you know anyone inside and out? I don't think that's possible. Is anyone in your family sick? Both Mom and Grammy are fighting cancer right now. I don't think my grandma has much time left. She can't walk on her own anymore. What kind of camera do you have? A Canon EOS Rebel T6. What is something you know you shouldn’t do, but do anyways? Download music. What is the most amount of money you have ever lost? Idk. Is photography one of your interests? Of course, I aim to make a career out of it. Do you know your neighbors very well? I personally don't. The person to the right of us, though, my mom knows decently and is a total and complete sweetheart. Have you ever hurt yourself just to get attention? "Kind of (I hurt myself for my own purposes, but I did want attention paid to it), when I was a teenager, because I desperately needed someone to treat me with compassion and, like, take the shit that was happening to me seriously." <<<< I don't like admitting this, but it's happened. I want to emphasize that it was not the primary reason and was rather impulsive anger and self-hate, BUT for the mentioned reasons, I did want this shit taken seriously and realize I really needed help. Has anyone ever called you conceited? No. Do you write ever write poetry just to get your feelings out? Certainly. Not like I used to, though. Who were you last really mad at? REALLY mad? I'm not sure, but probably Mom. What is a sad song that you like? "Terrible Things" by Mayday Parade has been in my head lately. What is a rumor people tell about you? I don't know of any. The only rumor that I know has ever been spread about me was that Jason and I had a baby in high school. Despite the fact I was slim then lmao. If you were given 1,000 acres of land with no strings attached, what would you do with it? Definitely plant a forest around a house I'd like to model myself, dig a nice pond for more wildlife... a lot of stuff that would benefit nature. If you had to flee their home country, where would you live? Canada. Do you think psychic abilities exist? Which one would you like to have? No. I'd like to uhhhh... predict the future when I will it myself, I guess. What’s a skill or craft that you would like to master, but haven’t? I wish I could draw exactly what I see in my head. How did you find out Santa isn’t real? My mom just told me. What’s a personality trait that you wish you had? CONFIDENCE!!!!!!! Do you believe in getting revenge on those who do wrong by you? If so, how do you go about it? Noooo no no. That creates so many more problems. If you were arrested with no explanation, what would your friends and family think you’d had done? That's a great question. If you could shop for free at one store, what would it be? For the sake of being smart, Wal-Mart. Necessities are there. Do you have any pets? If so, what are they? I have a Siamese-esque cat and a champagne ball python. I'm currently DESPERATELY trying to talk Mom into a Mexican red knee tarantula... and I really want a hognose snake. What event in your life would make a good movie? The breakup and my recovery. If you could dedicate your life to solving one problem, what would it be? Discrimination. Where do you find meaning in your life? Quite honestly, I don't feel it has much meaning currently. I'm not doing shit worthwhile. Do you believe things happen for a reason? Hell no. What do you think is a conspiracy? Honestly, I believe in quite a few. The one I believe in most was that the government was 120% involved in 911. Research. It is unbelievable. I'm very dubious that the "first" moon landing was real, either. There is an overwhelming amount of evidence it was on a soundstage. Why? America wanted to beat Russia in the space race. I love conspiracies. Do you believe in the afterlife? How do you picture it? Yes. I don't quite know how I picture it, but I lean towards like... this nirvanic state of peace and knowledge, and unity between the dead. What’s a superstition you believe in? I don’t believe in any superstitions. None. What is the dumbest way you’ve ever been injured? YOOOOOO when I was at Colleen's in-law's having dinner once, I literally took a large bite of rice RIGHT WHEN IT CAME OFF THE STOVE. I didn't know it'd only just been removed. My tongue was burned for weeks on end. Do you mind conflict? Hell yes I mind. I'm terrified of confrontation. If you could start a charity what would it be for? Something with mental health. Maybe to help those who can't afford help/therapy. If you were a cryptid (bigfoot, mothman, ect.) what would you be? I'm already a cryptid. What’s your ideal temperature and weather? Hm... like 55 and partly cloudy. What topic could you give a 20-minute presentation on with no preparation? Gay rights. Have you ever worn those drunk goggles? Yes, for D.A.R.E. in elementary school. Can you agree to disagree, or usually get upset over conflicting views? It depends on the subject of course, but I'm normally very good at agreeing to disagree. Rodeos – entertaining, or cruel? Animal fucking cruelty. Dumbasses getting gored are well-deserved. Who is the best female rocker? Why? Lita Ford is a badass. Slays on the guitar and is just cool. What color of roses do you find the prettiest? I actually like the classic, deep red. Have you ever accidentally found porn when looking for something else? I don't think so. Why do so many fans with OTP’s insist that their ship is real? I don't really know, but it's annoying. Some people are just friends, y'know. Being similar/compatible does not equate to actually liking each other like that, and the feral ones are just... wow. Do you draw fanart of anything? Not anymore. There's soooo many pictures I'd love to draw of Mark, but I literally love him so much I don't want to disgrace his face with my poor ability to make shit proportional lmao. Favorite thing to see in museums? Fossils! Have you ever seen an unwrapped mummy in person? No. What things have people shamed you for? My AvPD doesn't want me to think about this. Are there any 'adult stores’ in your area? Probably at some point. Have you been inside of them/shopped there before? No. Do you watch The Masked Singer? Any theories? No.