#but honestly i used to be a lot angrier but now im just sad mostly . and also happy to see my friend tony

[deanofsam]

i’m back on my tony stark shit 🗣️🗣️🗣️

[dealingdreams]

Okay TROS thoughts...here we go. I’m putting them all below the cut in case somehow you’ve avoided spoilers

so general thoughts...i didnt hate it nearly as much as i thought i would so thats pleasant but im gonna break it down more

things i liked:

Adam Driver.  just Adam. Fucking. Driver my dudes. This is like a backhanded compliment because JJ is so fucking lucky Adam was cast because the emotional depth of the film rested literally all on his shoulders for me. I only felt the weight if he was acting in a scene. 

I’ll admit im biased but I did adore the interaction between Finn and Poe. Their bickering amused me and the tenderness between them was wonderful...I think Oscar played Poe a bit jealous as well which i liked.

the Reylo scenes to me where beautiful. Ben never lied to her, she tried to deny it but she knew he never did. I loved that he was kinda guiding her, protecting her, loving her, and antagonizing her all at once. I loved how soft their kiss was, their smiles are literally the light of my life. Rey’s face when she healed him. Ben just staring at her as she tells him she did want to take his hand...just chef’s kiss

I loved the saber fights. Ben’s fight at the beginning was hot as fuck...and his fight as newly redeemed Ben Solo was even hotter somehow.

 I enjoyed the fight scenes between ben and rey! how often ben just let her walk away, and despite that one scene which i will mention below...i like i even tho rey was rather aggressive idk...it didnt really feel like she was trying to hurt him much either? i just think they had a lot of chances to kill each other and didnt take it...so i like that

i knew she was looking at ben in that clip i knew it...she only makes that soft face at him

I always enjoy stupid ass C3PO jokes for some dumbass reason

Han and Ben’s scene was heartbreaking and beautiful. Again tho JJ is fucking lucky to cast Adam cause recycling dialogue from TFA wouldnt have worked at all had Adam not been so fucking amazing

the save chewie hall blaster scene was fun 

i liked how fucking dramatic children ben and rey were with that damn ship lol...no im gonna force pull it...no im gonna...what dorks

while i didnt like the entire way the force bond was used i did enjoy seeing it still strong and growing

confirming canon soulmate reylo was a highlight

ben’s hair looked bomb

finn’s outfit was cool

Jannah was beautiful (please correct me if i misspell her name)

dark rey was glorious tho 

that new little droid is literally me so i adore it

that sith cave thing was really fucking cool looking 

the visuals of the film were most of the time stunning 

sooooo...now to what i didn’t like:

I think this first one is the most obvious for those who know me but...Ben’s death just feels so utterly useless to me. especially when they gave him a metaphorical death earlier in the film. i feel extremely hurt and betrayed. Disney has gone out of their way to make us sympathize with Ben Solo. They’ve revealed more and more of his past...how alone he was, the abuse he suffered from snoke and palpatine. just fuck...they just kill him...the moment he realizes he’s free and loved they end his life....literally WHAT THE FUCK. it’s a chicken shit way out of a redemption arc honestly. Not letting u just breath after his death was also so horrible. We barely got to see Rey mourn, we got a split second of it then it jumped to another scene...another second of her looking sadly at her sabor to have the moment interrupted 

tag on to above but...they didnt have him as a force ghost cause Disney is intentionally keeping where he is ambiguous so they can sell more shit which pisses me off so much

thats not how the force works

there couldnt have been that many sith could there??? cause like there can only be 2 at one time....fucking rule of 2 so how the hell were there that many

palps being like...see i actually want you to kill me...is ridiculous

rey palpatine is the most idiotic thing i have ever heard. Rey being a no one from no where was such an amazing thing. Just anyone can be strong in the force...you dont need royal blood to make you worth something....then they just retcon that??? the fuck I MEAN THE FUCK. 

Finn does nothing but worry about Rey the whole film. I know folks dont like his storyline in TLJ and while i understand that and do think it could have been written better i still adore it because Finn grew. He grew from just caring about a small group of people to caring about an idea to caring about something bigger than him. I didnt see any growth in his character in this film. His heroics were beautiful to see and I enjoyed seeing his heart but that was John’s acting more than the writing it think. 

sidelining rose was fucking disgusting 

the trio felt forced to me

the leia scenes didnt work for me honestly and they mostly just made me sad

bringing in lando now felt weird 

ive wanted force sensitive finn for a while but didnt feel right

why the fuck have finn want to tell rey something but never do...ugh i hate storytelling like that

they never explained how palps is back...he just is

rey stabbing ben felt odd to me. i loved the moment when she healed him, and i know technically her anger and darkside was coming out and she acted on instinct...nevermind that even before leia called out to him ben coudnt follow thru with the killing blow. 

....i’m sure i’ll think of more as i get angrier 

anyways over all...id be lying if moments didnt make me laugh or smile...if i didn’t feel a sense of nostalgia and enjoyment for 80% of this movie. The thing is that even with so much of it being enjoyable to me it still felt void. An action movie, with new characters, a confusing plot and very minimal emotional depth.

The emotion hinged soooo much on Adam or me. The biggest reason for that aside from that fact that Ben Solo is one of my all time favorite characters, is that the things Rey is dealing with in the film are directly related to her being a palpatine...and i HATE THAT. Like straight up wanna fling it into the sun. 

Rey never needed to be related to a force royal bloodline. She should have been allowed to remain strong because she was just strong. Kylo’s equal in every way, not because she was the granddaughter of a sith which btw you can’t inherit force powers. Retconing something so touching and unique from TLJ was just...fucking idiotic. All to please the loud but small misogynistic fandom that thought a woman couldnt be that strong on her own so she must be related to someone

The biggest thing....tho is killing Ben. it felt so unnecessary and just...i feel so betrayed. The interviews leading up to the film got my hopes up that i was worried for nothing. I always thought they’d kill him, because cinema seems to not know what to do with characters has tragic as him without just killing him in the end. we already got a redemption = death plotline in this franchise...why couldnt we get a redemption = life instead??? My friend who doesnt even like sw that much...tros was actually the 2nd sw fim she’s ever seen...thought it was unnecessary as well and agrees with me a lot about my feelings despite not having the same intense emotional attachment to him as me. She for a moment thought they’d be together at the end but nope. Its just...pointless to me now, the sacrifices han, luke, and leia made to reach Ben are for nothing. Their deaths...pointless...Ben means so fucking much to me. I’ve never felt such an intense emotional bond with a character before so im just hurting so fucking much right now.

Rey taking the name Skywalker isnt hopeful or cute its a slap in the face honestly...and it’s just weird! 

The last Skywalker died loved and held by the woman he loved and that is beautiful to me. He died happy and a hero thats a balm at least...but to not let him be the one to kill palpatine...after everything EVERYTHING he put him and his family thru was another just fuck...i wanted justice for him and he just got thrown away

Ultimately...Ben and Rey are soulmates and their force bond was severed. Palpatine didnt take that from them because he couldnt have...again not how the force works....but JJ used that bond to be a battery???? the fuck...but ultimately hes forcing Rey to live the rest of her days with a gaping wound in her soul. a wound unable to be filled and will be with her for the rest of her life...thats so fucking tragic to me. you give rey someone who is her equal, who understands her, and you take him from her and force her to be alone for the rest of her life?? and we are supposed to not see that as a tragedy? Her being fineishness at the end of the film seemed like direction from either the writing or in the moment, but just further proves he didnt bother to even understand the lore he was using. Force bonds were considered i quess legends in the current SW canon but Rian brought it back...so it’s back. and well

  "A bond between two living beings is not something easily broken. It is not a choice… it is like breaking a feeling. Like turning away from the Force. To break a bond, your feelings would have to change, or one of you would have to die—but even then, the bond wouldn't go away, it would simply… it would simply be empty, a wound."―Master Zez-Kai Ell[src]

and .... the only way to break it was to turn away from the Force, as Surik did on Malachor V. So basically it all came down to creating a wound in the Force”

sooo yeah...im pissed i’d give this movie a 1 1/2 out of 5 

thank you for those who have read my rantings! I hope at least some of this made sense

[jumpingjackets]

She Knows (Sequel to Our Secret)

Request:

Anonymous said: Hey! Im a new follower and i really love your work. Could i request sequels to Sugar Baby and Our Secret (you don’t have to but it’d be appreciated) thanks!

Word count: 1.6k

A/N: I’m so glad you asked me to continue that one, I love!!! George Washington!!! so!!!! much!!! Also, Anon, you can read the sequel to sugar baby here

T/W: a lot of homophobia and swearing and angst, please stay safe

Part 1: Our Secret (George Washington x Male!Reader)

After a moment of being so close to each other, George let go of you.

“We have to get back before Martha starts to wonder where we are.” He said. You hummed in agreement. “Can you help me with these? She wasn’t kidding when she said I was getting old.” He said in a joking tone, and it made you laugh. He opened the car door, where two boxes sat in the backseat.

“Martha insisted on bringing gifts from your parents.” He said, picking up the lighter of the two boxes. You went for the other one.

“Don’t worry. My mother loves when people give her stuff. Especially from Martha.” You said honestly. “What are these, anyway?”

“An herb bouquet and a few jars of Martha’s jams. She recalled how your mother loved them so much at the last dinner we hosted.” He said, walking over to the front door. Your mother then opened the door suddenly. You didn’t like the look on her face.

“George, hi!” She said with a little too much enthusiasm, which made George send you a strange look. “Come in, come in. Oh, that sweet Martha, always being so nice to us.” She said once she saw what both of you were carrying.

Once you were inside the house, you both set down the boxes in the kitchen counter.

“Come on, guys, join us out back.” Your father shouted from the back of the house. Both you and George quietly walked back. Everyone was already sat down on the table. You went to sit next to your father, and George walked over to his wife, planting a kiss on her cheek. As he did so, you felt your father’s eyes on you. You looked down, careful not to react to it.

Your mother came back out with the trays of food and a huge smile on her face. She placed plates and forks besides them.

“Everyone! You can serve yourself as much as you want.” She said, motioning everyone to come there. You didn’t feel like eating much, since your mother’s mood towards you made you too uncomfortable and you lost your appetite. You just got a small salad and sat back down to your seat.

When everyone had settled and started eating, Martha looked back at you. “Is that all you’re eating, dear?”

You looked up a bit startled. “Oh, uh, yeah. I’m not really that hungry.” You said, offering her a polite smile. She looked back at you with sad eyes, which you found to be strange.

Your mother continued to stare at you throughout the night. You didn’t have one bite of your food, and ended up throwing it away.

As usual, everyone had left except for George and Martha. They stayed back to help clean up and to chat with your parents. You were back in your room, having excused yourself by saying you were tired (not completely a lie). Your father let you leave.

As you were drifting away to sleep, someone abruptly opened the door. This caused you to sit up in shock. Your mother stood at the door, looking angrier than you have ever seen her in your life.

“You’re a fucking disgrace to this family. You know that, right?” She said, her face almost red in anger. You could already feel your eyes tearing up.

“Mom, w-what?” You asked, dumbfounded.

“Out of everyone to choose from, you just had to pick my best friend to fuck?” She spat at you.

Your eyes widened from fear or surprise, you couldn’t tell.

“Mom, what are you talking about?” You said, shaking your head. Tears were already streaming down your cheeks.

“Don’t act like an idiot, Y/N. I know why you’ve been disappearing so much.” She said, holding up your phone.

Oh no. You had forgotten to delete the texts between you and George.

“Mom, listen. We…” You began, but she cut you off.

“Don’t you fucking dare. I know exactly how much of a whore you are. I tried to accept you, Y/N. I really did. But fucking my best friend is something I won’t forgive. Start packing your things. I want you out of this house by tomorrow.” She said, throwing the phone at you. It landed right beside you.

In all reality, you never really did have sex with George. He always held such a high respect for you that never asked you once, but it didn’t matter now.

You were frozen. This felt surreal. Did she just throw you out of the house? You felt a sob rock your entire body, and you hid your face in your hands.

You cried for hours, being careful not to be too loud in case your mother could hear. This wasn’t happening.

After some moments of recollecting yourself, you laid down on the foot of your bed just staring at the door. You didn’t have the strength to stand up.

You took in a shaky breath as your phone dinged. You had a message.

Y/N, is everything okay? You seemed off today at dinner

It was George, and you felt your heart breaking. You debated on telling him what happened, when you decided to do so.

Mom is throwing me out of the house. She found out.

 Not long after hitting send, he was calling you.

“Hello.” Your voice was a hoarse whisper.

“Y/N, my god. I-I’m so sorry.” His voice cracked slightly. It hit you that you have never seen George cry.

“I can’t do it, George. I just…” You started but your eyes filled quickly with tears. You knew your voice would break.

“Where are you?” He said, breathing in deeply.

“In my house. She wants me out by tomorrow. I don’t know where to go.”

“Grab your things, Y/N. I’m picking you up.” He said, and you heard shuffling on the other line. You were about to protest, when you heard “No arguing, Y/N. I’ll be there in 10 minutes.”

The authority in his voice gave you the strength you needed to stand up. You gathered the most essential things you thought you needed. You could always come back tomorrow when your parents were at work.

He arrived in exactly 7 minutes. Your parents had gone to sleep, judging how every light was turned off. You swung your backpack over your shoulder and headed out the door. He had gone out of the car to wait for you, and you couldn’t help but start crying in front of him. He just held you in his arms, rubbing circles on his back. You let yourself lean into him. You felt completely broken.

After a few minutes like that, with him holding you, you recollected yourself. You wiped the tears from your face and looked up at him. His eyes looked watery, but you knew he wouldn’t cry. He would think that it wasn’t his right to, not at this moment.

He took your hand in his and led you to the car. The ride to his house was silent besides a few sobs that escaped your throat and George sniffling.

When you arrived, Martha was in the front porch. She looked worried. As you left the car, she ran up to you and enveloped you in a tight hug.

“Oh, dear.” She whispered mostly to herself, sounding heartbroken. She let go of you, and you kind of wanted her to keep holding you. She had been more of a mother to you from the moment you met her than your actual mother had in your entire life. “Come inside, sweetheart. You must be exhausted. I started up the bath for you so you can wind down.” She said in her usual loving voice, but with a hint of sadness.

You weakly smiled at her. “Thank you so much, Martha. I can’t even begin to tell you how much I appreciate it.” A bath did sound nice.

She took your hand and led you inside. You’ve never been at their house before now. It looked homey.

George was walking close behind you, and you were scared to look at him. You didn’t know if Martha knew, so decided to keep quiet until either of them let you know.

“I put some clothes in the sink in the bathroom for you to change after a bath. Take your time, sweetie, okay?” She said, rubbing soothing circles in your back. You nodded at her, and headed up to the bathroom.

After the bath, you felt calmer. You had stopped crying, too. The clothes that were laid out for you were slightly bigger for your body, but you didn’t mind that.

As you were walking down the living room, you overheard Martha and George talking in hushed voices.

“Poor kid. He’s such a good boy and his parents do this. Nobody deserves this.” You heard Martha say.

“Yeah.” George responded.

“Sweetheart. This isn’t your fault. His parents decided to do this.” Martha said.

“I helped them do this. He was texting me, Martha. He was seeing me. I don’t even want to imagine the pain he’s in.” George said, he sounded pained.

You quietly walked in with a perplexed look on your face. Both of them looked up at you.

“She knows?” You asked George, and Martha nodded. You must’ve visibly looked confused, and Martha smiled fondly at you.

“I knew you two were together the first time I met you.” She said, patting on the seat next to hers. You sat down and she threw a hand over your shoulder.

“Y/N, we want to let you know that you’re more than welcome to move in with us.” George said over the table, and Martha nodded.

“We love you very much and can’t, in good conscience, let you out into the world alone.” Martha said, and you leaned into her shoulder (to which she kissed the top of your head).

“I would like that.”