#but honestly complicated and messing up alfred is way more interesting

[sohotthateveryonedied]

Hiii!! I really love your tumblr posts and I'm pretty new to the Batfam (meaning I have only read fics and textposts about them, no comics) and I wanted to ask about the year Bruce/Batman gets "lost in time". I know general things of what the kids have been doing–Dick became batman and fired Tim from robin, giving it to Damian, everyone thinking Tim was crazy for believing Bruce was alive, (don't really know what Jason was up to though, was he still murderous towards Tim? Does the pit still affect him? Also I have no idea about Cass and Duke, were they introduced at this point??) Anyways, my real question was why was Bruce lost in time, what villain put him there? And how did he get out? And how long was he "dead"? Was Bruce in another reality or like just asleep the whole time? Oh! And how soon did this happen after Damian got introduced to the family–a couple months?

I'm so sorry this is so long, but I hope you answer and thank you!!

(I’m going to try and cover all my bases here by going into how exactly Bruce “died,” what went down during the Battle For the Cowl, what the Batkids did while Bruce was gone, and how Bruce came back. Hopefully it all makes sense?? We’ll see how it goes lmao.)

Part 1 - What Happened to Bruce:

So there was this event called Final Crisis (which I won’t go completely into since it would make this post a million times longer than it already is), but the bottom line is that Darkseid wants to overthrow reality and release his Anti-Life Equation, which would overthrow the whole planet and turn everyone into slaves. (If you’re interested in knowing more about the storyline, here’s a Reddit thread that explains it WAY better than I could.) 

What I CAN tell you is that during his final confrontation with Darkseid, Bruce is hit by an Omega Beam and turned into a burnt chicken nugget killed. Poor guy.

Final Crisis #6

Clark and Diana bring the body back to the Batcave and break the news to the Batfamily. Batman #687 covers a good portion of the aftermath such as Bruce’s funeral, the Batfamily grieving, and Dick coming to terms with his new responsibility of becoming Batman.

Batman #687

Part 2 - Battle For the Cowl: 

Musical chairs time, fellas! After word gets out that Batman is gone, Gotham erupts into chaos. Dick doesn’t want to take over the mantle, Tim needs Dick to take over the mantle, and Jason says “fuck it” and takes over the mantle himself because somebody around here has to. He becomes this murderous psychopathic Batman and starts taking out criminals with deadly force because someone’s gotta do the job, so it might as well be him.

Batman: Battle For the Cowl #1

(Okay honestly, this series had some pretty bad characterization overall, which sucks since it’s such an important storyline. Jason is portrayed as this violent psychopath, which...okay, he was kind of insane after the Pit and all, but not to this degree. Personally, I choose to owe the bad characterization to Bruce’s death because as much as Jason resents Bruce for all he’s done, he does still love him and losing him would be devastating, which would exacerbate his already fragile mental health. As for Damian, this happens roughly three years after his first appearance, so we can assume it’s been a few months since he first joined the family. He’s still relatively new at this point, so nobody knows how to write him yet. He ends up being depicted as if his main two personality traits are Bratty and Assassin-Child and that’s it. It’s all just a mess.)

Anyway, Tim tells Dick to become Batman and stop Jason’s reign of terror. Dick says no, so Tim follows Jason’s lead by saying “fuck it” and putting on the cowl himself. He goes to confront Jason, which ends in Jason beating the crap out of him (again) and leaving him for dead after Tim declines his offer to become Jason’s Robin. Dick goes to save Tim and ends up fighting Jason. 

Battle For the Cowl #3

Dick wins, Jason disappears, Tim is fine, and Dick finally gets his head out of his ass and becomes Batman. 

Part 3 - What Happens to Each Batkid While Bruce is “Dead”?:

Dick: 

As I said, Dick becomes the new Batman a month after Bruce’s death. He’s got big shoes to fill, and it takes some time for him to get used to his new role. He and Damian end up flipping around the classic Batman and Robin dynamic, with Batman now as the fun counterpart to Robin’s edginess. Dick, Damian, and Alfred relocate to the penthouse above the Wayne Foundation building, operating out of a secret Bat-Bunker in the basement.

Batman #688

Jason: 

After Battle For the Cowl, Jason is still batshit insane and determined to make Dick’s already stressful life even harder by becoming a supervillain with an ugly costume and an even uglier hairstyle. (I know it’s just because the artist sucked, but still. Jason is horrifying to look at during this time.) He mostly just gets on Dick’s nerves by running around Gotham with his new sidekick Scarlet and killing criminals as Batman and Robin wannabes. Eventually, Dick has Jason committed to Arkham Asylum and he hangs out there until Bruce returns.

Batman and Robin (2009) #5

Tim: 

Tim...doesn’t do great after Bruce’s death, mentally. Dick makes Damian Robin, his reasoning being that Robin is more of a sidekick and he sees Tim as his equal. By making Damian Robin, Dick hopes that it will give him the stability he needs to keep him from straying back toward the “bad” side. (It’s the right move ultimately, although his execution was pretty messed up since he didn’t discuss it with Tim beforehand, but he’s allowed to make mistakes. Dick’s father just died and now he’s in charge of picking up the pieces of their broken family. It’s a lot to handle.) 

Long story short, Tim has a breakdown, realizes that Bruce is alive, dons the Red Robin identity, and cuts ties with his family to travel the world in search of proof. It’s a rough time. 

Red Robin #1

Damian: 

Our little guy becomes Robin! So proud of him! As I explained earlier, Dick makes Damian his Robin with the assumption that it will keep him out of trouble, and he’s right on that account. He mentors Damian, teaching him how to channel his violent instincts into something productive, and it works! Slowly but surely, Damian makes the transition from bratty assassin to actual hero!

Batman and Robin (2009) #22

Cass:

Duke sadly was not introduced at this point in time, so he missed out on all the pandemonium. Cass, however, has been Batgirl for years by now, but she got kind of pushed aside by the writers after Bruce’s death. Bruce disappears shortly after adopting Cass, but once he was “dead,” the writers sort of moved Cass around for a while, not quite knowing what to do with her. First she was with the Outsiders. Then they got disbanded and Cass tried forming a new network of heroes to take over for Batman if needed. Then she helped out in said network during Battle for the Cowl, taking care of a newly ravaged Gotham. Then Cass gave the Batgirl mantle to Stephanie Brown after she became disillusioned with the role, thanks to the loss of her father and mentor. Then Cass picked up and moved to Hong Kong to “follow Bruce’s plans” by continuing whatever work he had set up for her there. It was all very vague and confusing, and Cass more or less got swept under the rug during this time. Thanks, writers.

Batgirl (2009) #1

Part 4 - How Bruce Came Back: 

When the Blackest Night storyline happens, the Justice League realizes that the corpse buried under Bruce’s grave is apparently not the real one and that he’s actually alive out there somewhere! How wild is that! This is further proven by Dick after he places Bruce’s body in a Lazarus Pit to revive, which has the same result because it’s very clearly Not Bruce and they should have listened to Tim from the start.

Batman and Robin (2009) #9

Anyway, what actually happened is that the Omega Beams that Darkseid shot at Bruce didn’t kill him, but rather blasted him back through time to the prehistoric era with his memories wiped. The Omega Energy inside of Bruce ends up catapulting him through various time periods, which is all part of Darkseid’s plan. With each time-hop, Bruce builds up more Omega Energy in his body which, when he gets back to his original time period, will be unleashed and destroy everything.

Batman: The Return of Bruce Wayne #5

It’s been a little under two years since Final Crisis, though in-universe it’s uncertain exactly how long Bruce has been “dead.” We can assume it’s been a year, give or take. The way he comes back is too scientific and complicated for me to understand, so uhhhh the bottom line is that Tim and a few Leaguers save Bruce at the Vanishing Point and the day is saved! Hooray! 

Batman: The Return of Bruce Wayne #6

(If you want to read about how it actually goes down, then I seriously recommend reading Batman: The Return of Bruce Wayne. It’s only six issues, so it’s a quick read and it explains the situation far better than I ever could.)

Bruce eventually reunites with his family after spying on them for a period of time as Insider to see what has changed in his absence:

Bruce Wayne: The Road Home

After that, things quickly settle back into their new normal. Dick and Damian stay on as Batman and Robin. Bruce goes back to being Batman as well, with him handling Batman Incorporated business and Dick continuing as Gotham’s defender. Tim keeps the Red Robin outfit, Steph stays on as Batgirl, and Cass becomes Black Bat. Jason stays in Arkham for a while before filing an appeal to be moved to a regular prison. He kills 82 inmates in less than a week and gets transferred back to Arkham, which he promptly escapes from. It’s a ride, I tell ya.

Aaaaand that’s about it! I hope this answered all of your questions!

[thattimdrakeguy]

Who’s Damian when he’s actually Damian?

People really freaking exaggerate how much of a maniac Damian is in his early years (besides his origin, obviously).

Like his origin to Batman and Robin is a giant stretch to be completely honest. Decapitating people, to helping people in a matter of months is a really big battle against the suspension of disbelief. Which is honestly my biggest problem with early Damian beyond the other writers completely messing with him to the point that it makes him come off like a crap character.

But beyond being extra violent with criminals, stubborn, and obviously bitter: He honestly isn’t that bad? He gets along with Dick well enough, except when they have a genuine moment caused by Damian’s glorification of himself and his parents. Though they really write Dick and Damian wrongly nowadays.

It’s really exaggerated how much of a maniac he was though.

Has lessons to learn obviously, and isn’t well-adjusted. But I enjoy it.

I really like the dynamic Damian has with Dick and Alfred when it came to how it was supposed to be. He’s a mature, young adult at the age of 10, and they treat him so, but yet he’s still a kid that needs to learn so they find a balance in it. As in they still mostly treat him as the young adult he is at heart, but still acknowledge that he has a lot to learn.

Dick treats Damian with respect as much as he can, and isn’t over affectionate like they act like nowadays. Like they basically to an extent gave Dick and Damian Tim and Dick’s relationship--when Dick and Damian had their own unique and interesting dynamic that suited them much more.

He’s more of a dad knowing he has to find the best way to teach his kid a lesson rather than all the nicknames and hugs and stuff they act like they are now.

I’m not saying Dick was abusive to Damian or anything, cause he probably isn’t smacking him all that hard. But they greatly changed their dynamic for something already done and a lot less interesting.

And people always sort of implied this thing were Damian cared a lot about Robin, but in context Damian didn’t really care. It was more about something different than that.

He wasn’t about Robin.

It was all about his dad and living up to his legacy. He has this super idealized version of Bruce in his head (even though he seemed to really dislike him initially in his origin, but Damian was super inconsistent even by the same writers) that he wants to live up to. And later on it was about his father son relationship with Dick. Damian’s parental figures are what causes his inner conflict.

Like Damian’s adult personality I also just find kind of endearing? Like I don’t like the current Damian at all. At freaking all, because it isn’t him. The Damian they act like is just--more of a normal kid in spirit I guess(?). Damian being a miniature adult and people respecting that is so much better than implying him being different is a problem by making him more normal. I enjoy the respect they have for him here with how he is. He’s just being himself and they aren’t pushing him like it’s a problem with him as a person. It’s about his morals not how he’s different. They respect that he’s different from other people his age. Which is oddly a warm dynamic to me that I appreciate. The current stuff trying to act like he’s more normal--completely misses the point of who he is as a character and personality, or even what the point of his lessons were.

As the way it was meant to be, they don’t treat him in a way that he would clearly find incredibly patronizing.

Which is super refreshing after so many writers decided to ignore the uniqueness of Damian to instead make him a lot more--typical and cheap fan service-y.

I also wanna say. I don’t think the comic is good by any means. Characters are out of character sometimes. Dick tries to resurrect Batman when he was against Tim trying it. Which they mention--but, like, it comes across like they only mention it because they’re aware they’re making a big contradiction, and it’s barely even handled. They make Jason have some strange complex about being Dick and dying his hair, even retconning his white streak being dyed in to being a gray streak from the Lazarus pit. They also imply Dick wants to date Kate Kane--which is...ew.

Also Dick constantly saying “Tim Drake” instead of just Tim, like they’d confuse him for some other Tim, as if he’s already partially forgotten comes off totally wrong. I can’t imagine it was the intention but it’s sort of icky how they completely changed their dynamic just for the sake of a change.

But as far as Damian’s character goes. It just makes it a lot sadder what they ended up doing with him. When he was a lot more interesting the way they had him. Instead of making him constantly regress, and at the same time use him for fan service by having things he wouldn’t do, and even turning him into a freaking joke. Just continuing with what made him unique would’ve been a lot better.

When they went for an odd gag it actually was because of them using his character instead of the joke being “Haha Damian is doing something he wouldn’t ever do” which is horrible character work, and super lazy comedy. When doing a joke that uses the character is far better at representing the character, and even builds characterk.

And another thing I much more appreciate is how they actually have Damian caring about his dad dying.

One of the biggest pains of Red Robin to me was the scene where Tim became Red Robin. One, cause Tim would never hit a kid. Two, Dick wouldn’t just suddenly think Tim is his equal and cast aside Tim when he knows how much Robin meant to Tim. Three, because Damian came off as a generic snotty kid who didn’t even care his dad died.

Damian doesn’t make jokes here. It’s his thing that’s he’s very serious. He’s very mature and adult-like for his age, that’s his endearing quality. He’s very serious and intense when it comes to his dad--like how it would actually be.

They portray Bruce as Damian’s main weakness. There’s no weird contradictions here about rather Damian is egotistical or insecure. He’s very prideful in himself and who he came from, but when it comes to his dad he becomes worried, because of how highly he thinks of him.

The portrayal of Talia (that I didn’t really feel like screenshotting) is of course infamously horrible, and out of character for her. But tis the reason why I’m not an actual fan of this serious or Grant Morrison in-general, or even this era.

Like it’s a plotpoint she does something to Damian’s spine to make it so she can control him--it’s super freaking dumb even for a comic. At least in this modern age.

Just how soulful and mature Damian is, is always why that’s what I say I like in him when ever I talk about him when I like him (which is whenever his writing doesn’t really annoy me at that time, or some other thing). Because it’s like--what he’s meant to be like. They ruined him afterwards to me personally. Trying to make something he’s not just like Tim except in their own unique ways given they’re different characters.

And personally, I don’t even think Damian’s character arc is that well done. It sounds great, but reading it, it honestly isn’t that amazing. He just kind of accepts to be better, and, like, he has a few moments here and there of learning, but it’s not actually a lot. It’s very overhyped. It’s genuinely done super lazy, like I think a lot of the writing in this series is lazy, but while there’s a few great moments--it’s just moments, and it’s hard for me to really get into it when it’s just moments.

To me this comic is very overrated, but like--as a showing of what Damian’s meant to be, given this is written by his creator. It makes things really disappointing for me more so, even though current comics already had me depressed with Tim, and even already Damian to an extent, but this just really sets it in.

I’m still someone who has the complicated opinion of I like Damian as a character in a way but I don’t really. Because he still doesn’t really have any stories I like--I pretty much just liked how he was in the beginning because of how interesting he was even if his stories never used it well--and continued to not like him because I feel like pretty much every other writer no matter what the fandom says bastardized him.

So most of my opinions still remain besides a different perspective on how Damian actually was in the beginning, but still. Like I still don’t think he’s a good character purely because of his later writers, and his character arcs general laziness when it comes to how it actually is on the page. But it’s just what he could be I guess. Which is how a lot of people are about him I suppose.

It really gets me how he has the same similar problems as Tim. Had a very obvious set character, random changes that people treat as character development even though when you look deeper it’s a lot more shallow cause it doesn’t freaking add up, they can’t even freaking draw them right anymore, and everyone has a weird inconsistent idea on what they’re even like because of all the bad writing.

It’s a headache.

[limitededitionsanderssidesblog]

Will Deceit  Disguise Himself Again???

So a thought randomly came to me regarding Deceit, who and will Deceit disguise himself as next? Thus far in the series, after DWIT, Deceit has only disguised himself as two sides, Patton and Logan. There are still other sides he can transform into.

But will he? As we’ve seen so far, disguising himself hasn’t lead to any significant success and he was always found out eventually, so will he even bother to try again? Well, they say third time’s the charm. But for what purpose would he need to go in disguise?

Well, let’s take a look at the other times Deceit has impersonated one of the other sides.

Deceit as Patton, in CLBG:

In order to analyze his reason behind this disguise, let’s revisit the plot behind this episode.

Thomas, who had made a previous promise to his best friend Joan to attend his staged reading, gets sidetracked with a handsome fella and forgets to uphold his promise to Joan. The next morning he gets a, seemingly angry, text from Joan asking where he was the previous night. The sides then argue over what course of action to take over the matter, be honest and face Joan’s wrath, or lie to not hurt their feelings.

In this episode, Deceit decides to impersonate Patton in order to convince Thomas that fabricating the truth would spare both Joan’s feelings and protect Thomas from any negative side effect that would come with damaging their friendship.

Later in this episode, after deceit is revealed and leaves, Patton calls him a form of “self-preservation” who wants to act in Thomas’s best interest.

Deceit knew that Patton, who is one of the most influential sides, would be adamant against lying because of his morality towards altruism. Therefore, he went in his stead before he could be summoned, which is why he was the first to appear. His entire goal in this episode is simply to protect Thomas from getting hurt and to try and convince him that lying isn’t something so morally evil.

But he isn’t just protecting him from external harm, but also from internal. Take this line into consideration.

I usually ignored this line and disregarded it as Deceit simply being snarky, until you take in Deceit’s cannon ability and responsibility to hide away all unpleasantries that Thomas doesn’t want to admit or know about himself.

He’s reflecting his purpose to protect Thomas, and he’s purposefully being sarcastic and chastizing. After all, Deceit was forced to keep himself hidden for years because Thomas didn’t want to admit that he was capable of dishonesty. He’s just as much as a side as the others, yet he wasn’t allowed to give his opinion or contribute to any of the debates because of Thomas’s fearful thinking and denial.

Years and years of being rejected finally grew to much, so when his plan to protect Thomas was rejected, he gave up on trying to conceal himself and dropped the act, although he still wasn’t able to reveal himself until Thomas gave his consent to know about him.

Look at his expression when he has to silence Logan from saying his name:

He’s just so done with it all, he looks annoyed and tired like, “Great Thomas knows something is up yet I still can’t reveal myself.” 

He doesn’t take any pleasure it keeping his existence a secret, but he’s forced to, it’s how Thomas unknowingly programmed him to be. Until at the end of the episode when Thomas finally sees him for who he is and he’s no longer required to stay in the dark. 

And he doesn’t even wait that long to stay gone. The next episode he’s the first of the sides to make a cameo in WDWGUITM

But then he’s immediately told to leave. After waiting years to finally be accepted into the group, he’s still ignored and despised. But more on that later.

Deceit as Logan, in SvS:

Okay, a quick summary of this vid- GO!

Thomas had just found out a few hours ahead of that he got a callback to be in an upcoming movie directed by Alfred Hitchcoppolucas, an esteemed director in this universe. However, the callback shares the same date as the wedding of two of Thomas’s friends, Lee and Mary Lee. The sides then argue which one they should go to, while Deceit initially disguises himself as Logan to try and reason why the callback is a better choice, but it quickly discovered.

I won’t go into too much depth over why Deceit wants Thomas to go to the callback (you can see my other theory, What is Deceit Really After? for further detail) but basically what Deceit is after in this episode is security for Thomas both socially and financially, a result as the part of him charged with self preservation.

But not only that, Deceit wants Thomas to stop denying the parts of him that are hidden away. Take a close look at these lines from SvS:

“That’s not really necessary. I think now you see that all this is-”

“But you’re still missing the point!”

“Okay, let me put it this way. Life... is like a pinata. Sure, and you want that makes you happy, right?! Well, in order to get that stuff you must attack the pinata. But you’re wearing a blindfold right now. You can keep it on if you like the game better that way, but if you take it off, it’s easier to get that stuff you want.”

The main point and purpose behind Deceit spending his time trying to get Thomas to admit that he wanted to go to the call back was not simply to get him to go, although that is a good portion of it. His true purpose was to get Thomas to take off his blindfold and stop denying the other sides of him still hidden away.

So, back to the main point, why did Deceit disguise himself? Well in Patton’s case it was because he still wasn’t allowed out as himself, and to protect Thomas from a potential fallout in friendship. With Logan, it was to convince Thomas to let the other sides out too and face the facts of his true self, and to get him to go to the callback for security. With these grounds covered, is there any real reason for Deceit to disguise himself again? And even if he did have a reason, who would he disguise himself as?

To figure that out, let's look over what disguising himself as the other two main sides would gain him.

Deceit as Roman:

From the first time we saw Deceit, we’ve seen him manipulate and trick Roman. In every episode he plays a major role in, he uses Roman almost like a puppet. Even roman admitted to feeling “used” at the end of CLBG.

For this reason, Roman appears to be very important to Deceit’s plans, not only because he is easily swayed with pretty words and affection, but because he shares a lot of his viewpoints. In the times that lying was brought up as a possible course of action, Roman was always initially in favor of it. And, since a large part of Roman is egoism, he can often come off as selfish, which Deceit has also been caused.

Disguising himself as Roman would be the perfect way for Deceit to get his point across without being ignored or met with negativity.

On the other hand, if Roman were to find out about Deceit disguising himself as him it could lead to a falling out between them, and cause Deceit to lose the only ally he has with the main four. This, as well as Roman chivalrous side, would never agree with letting the dark sides free, after all, he was the one who coined the name and has announced his dislike for each of the dark sides at some point or another, including pre-aa Virgil.

So the likelihood of being copied? 6.5/10, very possible, but I wouldn’t count on it

Deceit as Virgil:

This one is much harder because of their conflicting interests and their complicated history that has been hinted to but not (yet) shown.

In CLBG, Virgil was against Deceit!Patton’s idea to lie to Joan and thought it would be better to tell them the truth. This could be due to the his fear of being caught in a lie outweighing his fear of making Joan upset; or, it could be his fear that lying would summon Deceit, who he clearly doesn’t like.

In SVS, Virgil isn’t clear on his stance on the callback vs wedding debate and instead is only focusing on the fact that he doesn’t want Deceit there.

So, overall, there isn’t much for Deceit to gain by transforming into him, as the others are all well aware of his hate for him and everything he stands. 

But what if Deceit were to go about it a different way?

As I once described in my other theory I linked above, it is very likely that Deceit wants Virgil back on his side because of the influence and power he has. So what if instead of disguising himself to participate in a discussion, it was to make it appear as if Virgil reverted back to his old ways and get Thomas and the others to despise him again so that he’d have no choice but to go back to the dark sides.

Even if Virgil were to appear and reveal him, this would give Deceit the perfect opportunity to let a few secrets from Virgil’s past slip. Even if Virgil denied them, that seed of doubt would be plated in Thomas’s head. And that could grow into a weed strong enough to push Virgil away, right into Deceit’s hands.

Likelihood though: 4/10, not completely impossible, but most likely won’t happen.

At this point, Deceit is so over being hidden away and having to keep the others hidden away, one possible reason he released Remus, that he may not even want to disguise himself again. It is possible we won’t see him impersonate another side on screen for a very long time, or if at all.

[Short message undercut]

Sorry, I couldn’t get this idea out of my head and I had to write it down to try and sort it all out, but honestly just came out like a mess, I’m not sure if this makes any sense. Anywho, this is my take on the whole situation. Feel free to ignore this.

[bluboothalassophile]

wow blu! your "The Wife & Ex-Husband" it's really good, very complex and a mess but really good, as always jay with his love for women, but he loves too much women hehe what have you got yourself in, jay? oh this is going to be fun, a little drama but can't wait to see/read the next chap. :))

Hello,

I’m glad you’ve enjoyed the first chapter of Forgot to Love You, I’ve actually got a whole story going for it for the time being so I hope you continue to enjoy it! Here’s the second chapter, also able to be found here:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/21209576/chapters/50517893

Not Ex-Husband...

Raven survived the rest of her night by the skin of her teeth, which was why she felt so utterly exhausted walking into her hotel room, peeling off her painful heels, and undoing her complicated Viking braids. Dolphin had had a lot of fun with Raven’s hair earlier today and she had just left her friend’s work in place. Gingerly peeling off the loose, soft, skimpy red dress she dropped it to the floor as she walked for her bed, collapsing on it.

Right now she was just immensely happy she hadn’t taken up her uncle’s offer on taking the guest room in his penthouse, she just wanted peace.

Rolling over she stared at the ceiling, pulling her covers up to her chin as she thought about tonight. Specifically her ex-husband was on her mind, it hadn’t been long ago when he had been on her mind last time.

‘So what’s a girl like you doing in a place like this?’ he had chuckled, pressing his glass to his bruised cheek.

‘Probably the same thing a place like this is doing in a guy like you,’ she mused.

‘Ooo! A Deadpool fan!’ he mused.

‘Obviously,’ she had laughed gesturing to her shirt; the crude drawing of Deadpool shooting Francis while screaming ‘Where’s Francis!?’

‘Well, love, it’s a pleasure to meet you,’ he offered his hand.

‘Raven,’ she had said as she shook his hand. His lips brushed her bruised and bloodied knuckles.

‘Jason,’ he smiled with his split lip. He was devilishly handsome.

It was only later, she thought bitterly, that she learned he was there trying to get over a heartbreak. His fiancée; Donna; had run off with his best man; Roy Harper, and Raven had watched it on the media. From the safety of her family ranch in New Mexico while she plotted out her next moves.

She had gone to Hawaii to study humpback whales with Garth. She had stayed with the Curry family for two years, and in that time she had mastered surfing, gotten over her heartbreak, lived on a boat, went swimming in the reefs, learned to snorkel, and scuba dive, and got to survive loosing her mom. Lucifer and Maze had been most sympathetic to her plight, but they didn’t know the whole story. Only that she had met a guy in New Zealand, fallen hard and fast for him and it was all a mistake. She had never told them she married the guy, or that she had married him in a drunken haze that she couldn’t remember.

Everyday since she had left was a struggle not to call Jason, not to turn around and go back to ruin his life. Raven couldn’t do that to the man, he was just too good for her. He didn’t even know how good he was, and that was what made it all the more painful in her mind. He didn’t know what she was capable of, or what she’d do, he didn’t know how far she could go to survive or how horrible she could truly be. They were friends, people who just clicked together like old friends, and it had worked. Jason had made her happy, and she knew she’d ruin him if she stayed. She ruined everything afterall.

Her phone buzzed which had her picking it up as she fought her heavy eyes and stared at the simple text from Jason.

-Can we grab some coffee tomorrow? We need to talk.

Simple, neat, to the point. He was always to the point. Raven looked at the clock, wincing at the time then she looked at the text again.

-Can’t do coffee in the morning, how about lunch?

She kicked herself for offering to spend more time with him, after all she was his vacation mistake.

-Sure, still like Thai?

-Yes.

-I got a place, want me to get you?

-Sure. I’m staying at LUX.

-I’ll txt before I come

-ok. Nite.

She dropped her phone before rolling over and staring out her window at the lights of LA. She had no idea why she was doing this. He was the ex-husband! They had parted, on good terms even. Though she supposed he had more questions for her because she had just left him with three things before she had run off.

Closing her eyes she saw that moment when she knew this was all a huge vacation mistake.

She had come rushing down to the lobby on the phone, negotiating with the airlines to get back to Colorado; Durango, where her mom was hospitalized. It had taken her an over a day, with multiple airlines, and her uncle fast tracking her money and getting her shortcuts, to get back stateside. Raven had jogged into the lobby to see him with a woman who looked like a gorgeous model.

The other woman; who she would later learn was Donna Troy, Princess of Greece, sister to the Queen; Diana Prince; was tall, almost as tall as Jason was, long curly black hair, and features of a Greek Goddess. Raven wanted to punch the woman in her stupid face, but knew she couldn’t, especially when the woman grabbed Jason, spun him to her and kissed him. Raven had bolted at that sight; because she knew she couldn’t handle that and she ran for a lawyer. Drawing up the divorce was quick and simple, because she and Jason had shared nothing and nothing was in each other’s name, she also laughed it off as a drunk mistake.

Once all that was taken care of, she had gone to her hotel, he wasn’t there, so she packed up. Leaving him with a brief note, the papers, and the ring she grabbed her bags and ran for the airport with her passport in hand. She had made it to her gate, barely, had her stuff mailed to her and made it to the States in the span of twenty-seven hours. Literally forty hours after she’d gotten the call from her aunt that her mom was in the hospital and her stepfather didn’t think her mom had much time.

~~~*~*~*~~~

Jason stood in his hotel, staring out at the city, smiling a bit at the text Raven had sent him saying night, and slipped it into his pocket.

He had never told anyone, but his grandfather, Alfred, that Raven leaving him had royally pissed him off. And even then, he wasn’t mad at her, he was mad with himself. Raven was, hands down, the best damn thing to ever happen to him at the second worst point in his entire life.

The day he was supposed to get married to Donna Troy, his childhood sweetheart, and first love, she runs into the room he was getting ready and demanded to know how he felt about her. Not the best timing, he got it, but him not giving her an immediate answer had her blurting out everything she felt. They’d been together for so long, even when they had both had wild affairs, or been broken up, that they just landed back together because it’s what everyone expected of them. They were expected of everyone, from around the world, and Donna said that she was tired of it. She wanted to know what they wanted, just them and not what the world wanted of them. Jason didn’t have an answer for that, because he had honestly never thought about it.

Donna Troy was his endgame.

Always had been.

When he was a PJ, when he was Bruce Wayne’s billionaire screw up, when he was the punk teenager, he had never thought about it. Donna Troy was just there, and they were the endgame for each other. Or so he had thought.

She had, in her frustrations and fury, blurted out that she’d been having an affair with his best friend; Roy Harper, for years, and that’s when he had started in on her. The only times he had ever dated anyone else or slept with anyone else was when he was certain they were not together. They both lost their tempers, she ran from the church in her wedding gown, with Roy in hand, and the media had exploded with it.

Jason, in his spiteful fury towards his family and fiancée had taken the honeymoon tickets and taken the trip. Two weeks into his running away attempt he had withdrawn a shit ton of cash, ditched his credit cards, and his former cellphone, taken his private passport, and left with nothing but his go-bag from France, and made his way to Australia. Somehow, and he still wasn’t entirely sure about how, he had landed in New Zealand, and the first night there; in some hole in the wall, divvy pub he had met Raven Rachel Roth.

She was in New Zealand, finishing her exchange program, studying to be a Marine Biologist to work with her best friend; Garth Curry; who was studying orca hunting patterns in New Zealand at the time. She loved to read; probably more than he did, which was a true feat in his mind; she adored New York pizza, rooted for the New York Mets, believed in Magic, loved dogs, and animals as a whole, wanted to help people, and was probably a bigger tea lover than Alfred. He thought her to be the most mesmerizing person he had ever met. She was beautiful, quiet, commanding and classy. She was classy as fuck when she was cursing like a sailor after kicking ass; she might be a pacifist, but she knew how to kick ass when the time called for it.

He found her to be the most interesting person he had ever met, though she was eerily quiet and gentle.

He didn’t know what it was about Raven, but they just clicked, it was like he had known her all his life with how they were. Which was the only reason when he had woken up with a naked Raven in his arms, and a marriage certificate he didn’t remember getting, that he didn’t freak out. While she finished her program, he sorted out his shit, picking up an odd job or two repairing boats, cars, and even a few planes. Raven hadn’t let him move in with her, her dorm was occupied by messy roommates, so he had let her live in his hotel room. He had been contemplating getting a flat so they could stay together and sort their shit out.

Though that all changed in the span of a day.

He’d been walking for his hotel when Donna had materialized in front of him. He had been texting Raven about dinner plans, intending to talk to her about their marriage and the next thing they should do. Her program was coming to a close, and he knew she had family stateside. He wanted her to meet his family, and he wondered if she wanted him to meet hers; she had talked animatedly about them, but also vaguely.

Donna was just standing there, dressed in cream, looking like a classic Greek goddess; not a single curl out of place as her dark eyes assessed him carefully for hints. He didn’t know what to think, brushing her off to try to escape, when she had pleaded to talk with him. Apparently, his family was freaking out because no one could find him, and she had hired a PI to track him down. Jason thought they were all being over dramatic, he was royally pissed, and hurt, and had every damn right to feel that way. Also humiliated, greatly humiliated.

But this was Donna and they were Donna and Jason so he couldn’t blow her off like he wanted to do. However, he would do anything to keep the Princess of Greece away from the woman he loved, because he did not need Donna to attack Raven. He knew she’d do it, Donna had done it to all his other exes in the past; Kara, Isabel, Artemis, Violet, so he wanted her as far away from Raven as he could get her. He’d been shocked when Donna had casually pulled him into a kiss; like muscle memory, but he didn’t kiss her back. Instead he had pushed her away and told her very firmly they weren’t do that again; ever, and if she thought differently, he’d happily escort her to the Greek Embassy and walk away. Jason had no problem walking away from her without talking to her, he had zero problems with it.

Instead they had walked, walked to a different, far more upscale hotel where his father was waiting for him with two of his siblings, and Alfred. Jason wanted to be pissed, he did, especially when he saw Roy, but he couldn’t find it in him to be pissed. He had Raven, and that didn’t make the world better, but it made him alright.

It had taken over a day of interrogation before his family was satisfied, he hadn’t been abducted, but they wanted to meet Raven. By the time he had finally gotten them to come around to the idea that he had made a friend who was not in the service with him, or someone they knew, and got them to want to meet her, she was gone. Hotel concierge had told him she had run out of here with her bags in a hurry for the airport, and that she looked panicked.

Jason had rushed up to their room to find nothing but the divorce papers, a note and the gaudy ring he had gotten her when he was drunk.

He had never felt so terrified as then, she was gone. Like she had never been there. All her things were packed and gone, not a stray piece of clothing or even the socks she’d stuff in between the couch cushions, a hoodie of his was also gone, and he didn’t know if she had done that intentionally or not. But whatever had called her off must’ve been important, because she’d have never left her program without reason. All he had was a note, the divorce papers, and that gaudy ring.

She had laughed at the ring, endlessly laughing and wore it on a chain around her neck, not on her finger; it was too big for her slim hands in her mind. Though she wore thousands of slim rings on her fingers, but not that one. That one was always worn around her neck on a chain. He hadn’t signed the divorce papers, he couldn’t, he didn’t know what went wrong with them to make her actually get them. The papers were straightforward, they had shared no assets, or joined households; they had been two independent people bound by a Catholic Captain; Daniel Cassidy, on a ship for whale watching, into the holy sacrament of marriage. Jason’s mom would’ve skinned him alive if she knew he had the divorce papers; as his mom had been Catholic and didn’t believe in divorce. That’s part of how he had become Bruce Wayne’s son actually.

But she was gone.

Her note was simple, straight to the point, and blunt.

Dear Jason,

Something’s come up, I must go, right now. I’m sorry. I don’t know what to do, but I feel this is for the best, it was a delight meeting you and I will always consider you my dearest of friends. But our time has come to an end, and I’m sorry. I wish you all the best. I’ll let you go, so I think it’s best you let me go.

Forever, with Love,

Raven

She had given him every out she thought he would need, but he couldn’t bring himself to sign those papers. Nor could he get rid of the note. He now wore her wedding ring on the chain, under his shirt, he kept her note neatly folded in his wallet, and the divorce papers in a folder in his suitcase; on the off chance they ran into each other and she truly wanted that bloody divorce.

He hadn’t looked for her, though he could easily track Garth down and demand to know where she was. Her line ‘I don’t know what to do’ always struck him as her way of saying she was scared, and she wanted to do this alone, the divorce was so she could do it alone. He wouldn’t file it though, he couldn’t.

With great reluctance he had followed his family back to Gotham. Dick was miffed when Jason bought a Mets mug, though Jason despised the Mets as the eternal rival of the Gotham Knights. Tim thought he was heartbroken over Donna and promptly tried to set him up on several dates with the help of Duke and Stephanie. Cass insisted he was sad and always tried to get him to talk about it. Damian thought he was dramatic and should take Donna back; which had had Jason punching his baby brother in the mouth, because he’d never go back to Donna. Terry, Helena, B Jr., and Tommy mostly thought he had a dark secret and tried to uncover it.

Jason had only told Alfred about Raven, and shown Alfred the photos, the proof that she existed; though she had tried to erase herself from his life pretty damn well. Alfred approved of her, and continuously tried to push him to hunt her down, even after Alfred had read the note. Jason thought Alfred had valid points, but he couldn’t.

Until Australia, he had actively not thought about Raven, until that terrifying call. Much to B’s frustrations, and his family’s fury, he had dropped everything at the drop of a hat and bolted. Alfred and Selina had arranged his flight.

She was gone by the time he got there, nary a trace of her.

It was B’s wife, Selina who had tracked her down and done a casual run in with her to confirm she was alive for him. Selina had run into Raven in Seattle, where she was at the time, dating a man named Garfield Logan, and living with a woman named Rose Wilson. She was alright, and in one piece, Jason had nearly collapsed at the news, but resolved to stay away from her so she could be happy. She was dating someone, she had built another little life for herself, and he wanted her happy.

It was the only time he had considered signing the divorce papers and letting her go fully.

He hadn’t though.

He could never figure out why. He could never get the nerve to call her, to reconnect, nor could he find it in him to sign the bloody divorce papers. He kind of hoped she’d find out and track him down to yell at him, but she hadn’t ever come. Five years and she had never come after him, it unnerved him until tonight.

Setting his drink aside he walked to his bed and sat on it as he thought over Raven and what seeing her had stirred up.

Tomorrow he would talk to her, tomorrow he would tell her they were not divorced and he would beg, on his hands and knees if he had to, beg her for a second chance. He would do whatever she wanted, but he didn’t want to let her go; never again.

Raven cursed God for creating morning, she cursed existence for it, and she cursed her Aunt for calling her about Passover plans, and if she’d make it to Long Island for the celebration with her grandfather and cousins. Raven had barely said sure before hanging up and cursing morning. Coffee was not her normal poison but after last night with Rose, Joe, Kyd, and Slade, she needed it. Glancing at the time she saw that it was almost time for lunch, cursing the existence of family, people, and general morning issues she stumbled into the shower. Once cleaned a bit, she twisted her hair up into a large bun pinned to her head with two heirloom hairpins. Her outfit was her Wright jersey, and jeans before texting her ex-husband she was ready for lunch with him while she sipped her coffee and walked out of LUX. Luci and Maze were not awake yet, so she didn’t have to deal with their interrogation; yet.

Jason texted that he’d be there in fifteen.

She just hummed to herself and sipped her coffee; wishing for the millionth time it was November or October so she could have pumpkin spice flavoring. But alas, it was February and not the time of year for pumpkin flavoring.

Jason pulled up in a black Audi, she got in before he could get the door for her and she sunk into the warm seat. Though she had a leather jacket, and didn’t get cold, she would admit she was exhausted.

“You look like death warmed over,” he remarked which had her glaring at him.

“Do you realize what a pain in the ass, not one, but three bridezillas are!?” she demanded. “I was up until three in the morning just trying to diffuse the flower crisis between Dad, Kyd and Joe! Then Alice calls me at eleven in the morning wanting to know if I’ll be home for Passover.”

“Really?”

“Wherever we’re going better have copious amounts of coffee because after lunch I have to go deal with the tailor.”

“Then I’ll take us someplace else,” he promised. “No Thai.”

“I want this wedding over with!” she whined.

“Could be a shotgun wedding they don’t remember,” he chuckled.

“That’s not going to happen,” she sighed regretfully. She was insanely happy for Joe and Kyd; especially because Joe had been so nervous about coming out as Pansexual, but Slade, Rose, Grant, and her had been prepared to be nothing but supportive; she still had the Pride banners shoved in her closet from the parade she did with Joe and Kyd last year. Though she was miffed at a lesbian trying to get into her pants; that had gotten ugly.

“Well, not everyone can be as fortunate as us,” he teased.

“Everyone else remembers their wedding,” she pointed out. “Also, if my family found out I got married but didn’t have a huge, traditional Jewish wedding, I think they’d perish!”

“You’re Jewish?”

“I love bacon,” she deadpanned.

He laughed. She forgotten how beautiful his laugh was; it wasn’t fair that he got to show up and remind her how beautiful and amazing he was. And it wasn’t fair that she couldn’t have him, Donna Troy was dating him again according to the tabloids; and she hated the Princess for it. But Jason deserved the best, and that was not her.

“Yes, my family is Jewish, my grandfather survived Dachau, his family was set to Auschwitz,” Raven answered.

“Damn, I didn’t know,” he said softly, his hand caught hers and his thumb gently rubbed her knuckles. “My mom was Irish Catholic,” he informed her.

“I bet our wedding would’ve been a riot then,” she decided with a soft laugh.

“Probably,” he chuckled. She withdrew her hand and wrapped it around her warm travel mug. “So the wedding, I didn’t know you had a brother.”

“I have two step brothers, and a step sister,” she answered honestly. “I have an adopted brother, too.”

He nodded as he drove them onto the freeway and started heading north.

“So how’ve you been Jason?”

“Fine, been nonstop work since New Zealand, I’m taking over the West Coast branch, Tim’s taking over the East Coast,” he answered. “I also have some international business I take care of.”

“That’s great.”

“I am just thankful to be moving away from my family finally,” he chuckled.

“You adore them and you know it.”

“That’s not the point, they’re overwhelming, other than Cat and Alfred.”

“Cat and Alfred?”

“Sorry, Selina is B’s second wife, and we call her Cat because she loves cats, and Alfred is kind of our grandfather.”

“Cool.”

“How about you?”

“Well, I move a lot, Garth and I still work together, with my brother Victor,” she answered. “My family gripes a lot that I’m not around enough because we travel all the time, but they get it. They’re supportive, even if that means a lot of Facetime calls.”

“That’s great,” he smiled; she saw it was a genuine smile which had her shyly returning it.

“So what about you? Anyone special?” she asked.

“Special?”

“Dating! I see the tabloids Jay,” she chuckled. “So you and Donna are you rebounding to serious again?” she questioned. She hated asking, mainly cause she still wanted to claw Donna’s eyes out, but the woman was a Princess, she was more than worthy for Jason Todd.

Raven didn’t notice his knuckles whitening on the wheel as they both stared at the road.

“No,” he answered softly. “I will never get serious with Donna again. We’re… we’re just trying to be friends, and it’s not easy,” he admitted.

“Being friends with exes is never easy,” Raven assured him.

“What about you?”

“Me?”

“You know, dating,” he chuckled.

She grimaced remembering her few failed attempts at dating. “No, not really. The last guy I dated had asked me out to make my sister jealous; it worked, they’ve been together for two years. And there’ve been a few dates, here and there, but no sparks or attraction,” she shrugged.

She didn’t notice him relax a little.

“Shame,” he decided neutrally.

“You know what I miss, and I blame you entirely for it,” she asked.

“What?”

“Sex,” she blurted out. He roared with laughter as they sped down the freeway.

“Really!?”

“Before you I had never had sex, because of you I have impossibly high standards for sex that no one will ever be able to meet!” she whined.

“I can solve that,” he offered.

“Maybe,” she shrugged dismissively; it’d never happen. Not with him. He was a galaxy away from her league.

“I missed you Rae,” he chuckled.

“Same,” she admitted with a smile. “So where are we going?”

“A place with sandwiches and coffee,” he promised.

“Oh Thank God,” she moaned. “Sorry, I haven’t eaten since yesterday afternoon, and I didn’t get a great nights sleep.”

“No need to explain Rae,” he promised.

“Well, it’s just…” she sighed as she rubbed her brow. This wasn’t about coffee and sandwiches with her ex-husband. “This isn’t just about having lunch with you Jason.”

“I kind of figured.”

“You did?” her head snapped over to study his relaxed profile.

“It’s not just lunch for me either Rae,” he said and looked over at her with a serious, guarded expression.

“I’m sorry,” she murmured. “For… for everything,” she sighed.

“No,” he said so harshly and firmly she just stared dumbly at him.

“What?”

“You have no reason to be sorry, for any of this,” he said. “You tried to do the right thing, I’m sorry I didn’t come after you five years ago so we could talk, a real talk, about this.”

“I…”

“No, let me say this because you talked last night and I need to say this.”

“Okay.”

“You met me after Donna had left me at the altar and ran off with my best friend, and brother in arms. And you helped me through a truly terrible, humiliating point in my life, and I never thanked you for that. You didn’t push or pry or try to make me feel things I didn’t, or were expect to. You were there, you were my friend, my wife, and I’m sorry I didn’t make you feel valued enough or safe enough to come to me for help when you needed it. I’m sorry you felt the need to run off on your own rather than come to me. And I’m sorry you saw Donna kiss me, and I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright, Jason, it was a vacation mistake,” she shrugged.

“No, it’s not alright, Raven,” he said it firmly. “Donna was the mistake. You were not.”

“She’s the Princess of Greece, Jason, I’m… me, I’m the mistake,” she said confidently. She knew she was the mistake here, no way in a million years he’d have even stuck with her once they got back to reality, and she went trapezing off with Garth and Vic to study the ocean he’d realize what a terrible mistake they were.

“Rae,” he spoke softly and she glanced back at him. “You are the best damn thing that has ever happened to me. And we’re here.”

“I dibs the tuna sandwich,” she warned him as they got out of the car. He got the door for her, she nodded as she passed. He got them a table, it was only after the starstruck waitress left that he turned his attention back on her.

“Tuna is all mine,” he decided.

“That’s declaring war,” she warned.

“Perhaps,” he shrugged.

“How about we split two sandwiches, I’ll give you half my tuna for the crabcake!”

“Deal!”

“Excellent,” she chuckled. “And Jason, just so you know, you don’t have to lie to make me feel better about us.”

“I’m not lying,” he said.

“Sure you’re not.” She snorted and smiled as she put the menu aside and sipped her coffee. She still wanted pumpkin spice, she cursed autumn for being so far away.

“Rae, you and I, it was the best damn thing to happen to me,” he stated it firmly.

“You are surprisingly happy about us for an ex-husband, are you all this way or just you exclusively?”

“Well, it’s not an ex-husband thing, because that’s kind of what we’re here to talk about,” he said.

“How is it not an ex-husband thing?”

“Kind of like how this isn’t an ex-wife meeting,” he answered. “I never signed the papers Raven.”

She felt all the blood drain from her face as the waitress came over to take their order. He placed the order and waited for her to respond.

“You… you what!?” she sputtered dumbly.

“Never signed them, Rae,” he answered. “So technically, we’re husband and wife.”

“But… but…” she stammered dumbly not knowing what to say to that. “I… WHY!?” she hissed.

“Because,” he answered.

“That’s not a reason to stay married to a person Jason! Especially when I’ve tried dating other people!” she hissed. She was so going to Hell for adultery now.

“No, you didn’t know,” he answered. “But I couldn’t sign them or file them.”

“You should! You should right now!” she insisted.

“No,” he repeated calmly.

“Jason!” she hissed.

“Raven.”

“This is SERIOUS! If you don’t sign those papers, and people find out that… and… we’ll, the media will crucify you! And your family will join them!” she hissed.

“Let them,” he shrugged. “I was serious Rae.”

“I don’t even remember us getting married!”

“Neither do I, but nonetheless, we are,” he said levelly.

She groaned as she hid her face in her hands and wanted to tear her hair out of her head in frustration now.

“Rae, love, look at me,” he pleaded. She glared at him through the fringes of hair now cascading around her face. Oh she was pissed, the hardest thing she had ever had to do, even harder than saying goodbye to her mother or watching her family fall apart because of her biological father, was saying goodbye to the man she had married. And worse, she had known it was the right thing to do. Drunken mistakes should not be consequences for life, and she had been able to fix theirs with a simple divorce!

“I’m… I fixed our mistake! I did everything to fix it!” she snapped.

“I couldn’t sign the papers because I never could view it as a mistake,” he answered levelly. “And if you’re willing, I would like to try again.”

“Oh no,” she gasped. She could feel her chest tightening in panic, as her heart slammed in her ribs. “No. I… No, I can’t do this, no.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’m a mistake Jason!” she snapped. “I’m a mistake and this marriage between us, only happened because we were drunk off our asses and, on a boat, somehow; and I still don’t know how we got on the boat because the last thing I remember is the pub! Also, you’re… you were, are, engaged to a Princess, how the hell can I compete with that! You’re American Royalty, Jason! Your Dad is the richest man in the world, and I… I’m me!” she sputtered.

“You loved me when you thought I was just Jason Todd, mechanic,” he pointed out.

“This isn’t about the money Jason,” she sighed.

“Then what’s it about?”

“You deserve better than me,” she stated.

“I think it’s the other way around love,” he said softly. “The day you left, the day Donna came to take me home, I was coming home to you, to talk to you about us getting a flat, and seeing where you wanted to go from New Zealand. If Donna hadn’t intercepted me, I’d have come back with you, immediately, no questions asked, no expectations. You’re my wife Raven.”

“Doesn’t mean we should be together!” she snapped.

“I think you and I got married for a reason, drunk or not, and I think we should give this a real shot,” he said firmly.

“Jason…”

“I would have called you five years ago if I wasn’t so damn scared, or hurt, and I would’ve come for you immediately, always regretted that I didn’t. So please, please, I’ll do anything for a second shot with you,” he said softly.

“Jason, sign the papers,” she pleaded. “You’ll… you deserve to be happy; I don’t make people happy.”

“How about, we date, try dating, and if it doesn’t work out, I’ll sign the papers,” he bartered.

Raven stared at him; she didn’t know what to make of that.

“A date?”

“Can’t a man ask his wife on a date?”

“I…”

“We didn’t do the whole dating thing the first time around, and I would like to remedee that this time,” he said levelly.

“We skipped straight to the marriage, and wild sex,” she muttered as they were served. They both waited for the waitress to leaven before she automatically swiped half his sandwich and he took half of hers.

“I missed the sex too,” he chuckled. “You broke my standards, no one else compares.”

“Oh Thank God That’s Ruined For You Too,” she laughed as she took a bite of her tuna sandwich.

“You ruined many things Rae, like tea, I still can’t figure out how you made that one tea to make me sleep, but I can’t remake it for the life of me. I’ve almost cried craving it,” he chuckled.

“You ruined waffles for me,” she warned. “I mean no one can make them right, I cried on my kitchen floor one morning I wanted them so badly. The chocolate chip ones with strawberries,” she moaned at the mere memory.

“Good book conversations,” he stated. “I joined a book club I was so desperate to talk books, intelligently, turns out that was mostly a gossip group; all four of the ones I joined.”

“Ha!” she stuck her tongue out at him for that, he had told them to join a book club when they had first married and enjoyed talking books. “I told you they weren’t what you thought!”

“Some of them must be actual book clubs but I haven’t found one.”

“Could be because you’re Jason Todd.”

“Very possible.”

“But we don’t have to be married to do things like that, I can give you the tea recipe and we can be friends who talk books,” she offered.

“Rae, it’s not just about that,” he chuckled.

“Sure it is, I’ll be your friend, but I don’t think I should be your wife,” she said firmly.

“Little bird, I’m not divorcing you, besides you need to keep the insurance,” he said firmly.

“About that, I should pay you back.”

“Don’t you dare,” he warned lowly. She stared at his fierce, guarded expression. “And don’t even think about changing me from your emergency contact!”

~~~*~*~*~~~

He didn’t want her to pay him back for taking care of her, she would never understand how much she had taken care of him. And when she brought it up it reminded him how neatly she had erased herself from his life, how she had promised to remove him as her emergency contact. That had actually been a fight between them when they were barely friends. A bar fight landed him in the hospital, and he had to call someone, apparently, they were going to call his grandfather when he convinced them to call the girl he had hooked up with the night before, Raven. Raven had been shocked but had come to help him get discharged, and the ensuing arguments had led to them agreeing to be each other’s emergency contact while they were in New Zealand. The wedding had happened after that by about a week.

“I…”

“You terrified me, Rae,” he stated. “I came back to the hotel room and everything of you was gone, including our photos. You just… you erased yourself from my life, and I swear I couldn’t take it if you removed me as your emergency contact. I’m your husband, I deserve to know if you’re in trouble.”

“Ex-husband.”

“I haven’t signed the papers, and they’re safely hidden away so you can’t make me,” he pointed out. He felt a bit smug about that statement as she glared at him.

“I signed them!”

“I know, and it still terrifies me that you could do it so easily,” he stated. He saw her flinch, and he knew. Just one look at her and he knew, that it hadn’t been easy for her. None of this was easy, but he got the sense that this was also his fault for waiting five years. He hadn’t lost her yet, but he got a feeling that he was precariously close to if he wasn’t careful. There was very little about her, what made her make her decisions, that he actually knew and if he wasn’t careful he knew he could lose her. She already seemed to hold a low opinion of her value, and she seemed skittish about having someone in her life who wasn’t family. Though the skittish aspect of her was always there, if he moved to quickly, or raised his voice a certain amount she’d jump, she’d flinch, and he remembered her nightmares, though very few, were very intense. Something had happened to her, before he had met her, something that made her skittish; made her this way, and he should’ve chased her five years ago to not let it manifest further, but he hadn’t. Things to add to his list of regrets.

“I did what I thought was best, for us, as people in a situation we didn’t sign up for.”

“I have a marriage certificate that says we did sign up for this.”

“Jason, I… I’m not the best person for someone like you,” she started.

“I think you’re the best person I’ve ever met, Raven.”

“Jason…” she sighed as she dragged her hand through her hair.

“Can you please just consider giving us a shot, a real shot?” he asked.

“I…”

“I would like to take you, not my guilt stricken wife, out,” he reiterated it. “I would like to take you out.”

“Like a hit or a date?”

“I’ll leave that to be a surprise.”

“I don’t like surprises,” she muttered.

“Well, then we’re a hell of a surprise,” he mused. “Please Rae. I would like to take my beautiful, estranged wife out on a date, have fun, and no expectations.”

“I gave you the divorce papers so we wouldn’t have expectations.”

“You gave us an out, and I’m not out yet,” he said levelly.

“Fine,” she threw up her hands in defeat. “I’ll go on a date with my idiotic ex-husband.”

He smiled in triumph and stole one of her fries.

“HEY! Hands off!” she snapped as she snatched her fry basket up.

“We’re married, we’re supposed to share.”

“Only until you sign those damn papers!”

“Never,” he chuckled. “So when are you free from family and wedding obligations?”

“You are not going to my brother’s wedding, just so we’re clear about this. You are not going,” she stated that firmly. There was a bit of hurt in his heart that she wasn’t even going to offer it as an option, but he was sure that in time he’d win her over. Doing so at her brother’s wedding was likely too much pressure, and would require them explaining that they were married; which he didn’t know if her family would take that well. Going off Lucifer’s reaction he would bet they didn’t even know.

“That’s fine,” he nodded.

“I’m free after the wedding. The wedding is February fourteenth,” she sighed.

“So can I take you for dinner on February fifteenth?” he asked levelly.

“Fine,” she nodded. “But I’m leaving with Garth and Dolphin on the twentieth, we’re meeting up with Vic on a job.”

“Where’s the job?”

“We’re going back to Hawaii to research reefs. Garth’s family is there and they want to be close to his family,” she shrugged.

“I thought he studied whales.”

“Well, he’s a marine biologist, there’s a solid job for him in Hawaii, same for me, and Vic’s already there, so we’re going there. Dolphin also…” she clamped her mouth shut then.

“Also what?”

“She’s pregnant, she wants to be close to his family, but I’m not supposed to tell anyone that!” she muttered.

“Congratulations to Dolphin and Garth.”

“They’re excited, I’m telling my family I’m leaving after the wedding,” she said.

He nodded, he was already trying to calculate if he could afford to head of to Hawaii for a bit to continue wooing his reluctant wife.

“I’m still going to call and text you,” he informed her.

“You don’t have to.”

“We’re friends, it’s about time we act it. And we’re husband and wife.”

“Fine.” She rolled her eyes, and he smiled; this was going to take a lot of work. That was fine by him though.

[bat-lings]

Opinion on Jason Todd/Bruce Wayne relationship as a father-son?

ALRIGHT the human rambling disaster that I am struck again

Jump to the conclusion if it’s too long!

It’s just really hard discussing anything about Jason without acknowledging the sheer mess that DC’s whims made of him. To take that inconsistency into account let’s consider his relationship with Bruce from three angles:

Before Jason’s death / during his Robin days as portrayed before Starlin;

Before Jason’s death / during his Robin days as portrayed since Starlin and up until Jason’s resurrection, through mentions & flashbacks;

Post-resurrection.

Sadly enough the first era is the only one that bothers to portray a father-son dynamic with enough content to have a real opinion on, but I’ll take what I have. And what we have then is pretty great.

Jason’s Robin days

We’re in the 80’s, and Jason & Bruce’s relationship is the most ridiculously pure thing to have graced our poor souls. It’s soft and good.

They have great interactions, a real proximity, and overall bring a lot into each other’s life. Alfred and Bruce are happy to have another kid at home, and Jason is as much in need of guidance & of a family as any other kid. Jason doubts himself a lot and Bruce does his best to reassure him. He’s also is a teasing little shit and that’s great.

[Batman #377 || Detective Comics #579]

[Detective Comics (1937) #573]

JASON YOU’RE TOO CUTE. Also the tired dad feel is strong in that one lmao. Jay, lad, my son, my life,, what have you done to the newspaper,,,,

Ahem right, less gushing more commenting.

As you can see, Jason and Bruce’s relationship before his death/resurrection is pretty peachy. The slice of life sequences strengthen their father-son bond into the reader’s mind. We’re shown they’re father and son rather than just told so.

At some point Bruce’s custody of Jason is temporarily threatened, and that arc is a vivid telling of how strong their bond is.

[Detective Comics #542 || Batman (1940) #377]

Just. That whole speech. “Only Jason is real.” Definitely one of my favorite papa-bat moments.

And as Robin? Jason is clever, often brings valuable insight during cases, and respects Bruce’s teaching and authority. Bruce makes a good job at addressing Jason’s insecurities and guiding him, both through his training and by honing his moral compass.

(Note that I said honing, ‘cause Jay’s moral sense is very much present well before he meets Bruce. He was cool with stealing to survive but Ma Gunn’s school was too much for him.)

He’s initially nothing like the violent angry kid he’s now known as. Pre-Starlin, the only times Jason acts brashly is when confronted with his father’s killer. When Bruce addresses the matter, it’s not about blaming or judging him. ‘Cause he gets it, but it’s also his job to make sure Jason’s not compromised.

[Detective Comics #580 & 581]

And when Jason promises to keep himself in check, it’s all it takes for Bruce to take him back on the case. That’s how much he trusts him. Read the end of the issue and see how Jason proves himself worthy of that trust.

Not only does Jason understand Bruce as much as Bruce understands him, but he’s very perceptive in general. He tends to be straightforward with what’s on his mind… at least when it comes to calling out Bruce lol

[Detective Comics #579]

(They’re talking about Leslie on the last one btw. She was Bruce’s surrogate mom after his parents’ death and they have a great dynamic. Another pearl straight outta the 80′s!)

They get each other, they trust each other, they respect each other. Honestly Bruce’s relationship with Jason was the most healthy he’s had with any of his kids.

We can kiss all of that goodbye after Starlin has his way with Jason. And since Starlin’s “““characterization””” is the one that crossed the years, of all things, we can consider Jason’s initial portrayal pretty much retconed— and his relationship with Bruce with it. Shame, huh?

Of Flashbacks and Victim-Blaming Robin days, 2.0

From the 90’s to the reboot there is… few material about Jason’s relationship with Bruce. Or about Jason outside of his death/Robin.

Whether Jason is mentioned or appears in a flashback, the goal isn’t to recall a father-son relationship. It’s to drive through the point that Jason was reckless and violent. That new portrayal has its predictable impact on their relationship, and that’s pretty much all there is to say.

[Gotham Knights #43]

Obviously Bruce doesn’t trust Jason, since Jason is now a “reckless angry kid who likes to inflict pain on criminals”. Beatty delivers cool stories, but if you read that arc you’ll see that he lies it very thick when it comes to victim-blaming Jason.

Depending which writer/comic book you’re reading, it’s implied or affirmed that Jason is Bruce’s son. You’ll probably have a line about Bruce’s unending guilt, or Jason’s (*sigh*) recklessness. Mostly Jason’s a cautionary tale addressed to either Tim (who never gave much of a shit about Jason btw) or Cass (Batgirl #7 is a rare instance where it’s done without victim-blaming because Pucket is da bomb).

But there’s legit no material about Jason’s childhood in the Manor, or how him and Bruce acted around one another, what they talked about, Jason’s personality aside of “angry”, how Bruce addressed his son’s self-doubts – oh right modern!Jason is an arrogant brat who claimed the Robin mantle for himself so that’s out.

DC rolled with Starlin’s portrayal, and didn’t bother to construct anything else between Jay & Bruce to replace the parts they chose to erase.

[Batman (1940) #645]

The point is: Jason and Bruce’s father-son relationship before Jason’s death is barely spoken of. We don’t know shit about how Jason was as a kid. Bruce loved him but didn’t trust him since his “mean streak” made him sooo dangerous and unmanageable. That’s it. Jason is the bad Robin first, the dead Robin second, and Bruce’s son last.

Resurrection and onward

Jason and Bruce’s relationship post-resurrection is complicated, for obvious reasons, and has interesting potential. My main problem with it is that it’s seldom addressed after Jason makes his dramatic return in UtH & the arc is closed.

For all that I have a love-hate relationship with Winick’s writing, and for all that I don’t like everything he’s done with Jason, his narrative is mostly coherent (and a good read overall!).

Winick doesn’t talk outward about Jason and Bruce’s bond before Jason’s death, but enough is implied. Jason’s damaged psyche centers around Bruce and what wrongs Jason considers to have suffered from him. He reorganizes his entire identity and actions around Bruce.

It’s not only consistent with Jason’s mental health at this stage, it’s telling of Bruce’s importance for him. The same way Bruce must have been his world after he took him out of the streets, Bruce is still very much his world when Jason is on a vengeance frenzy.

Killing Bruce, taking revenge against Bruce, making a point to Bruce; everything is about Bruce. It’s the whole “the opposite of love is apathy not hate” thing. DC could’ve expanded on that and made it evolve into whatever, but they just, y’know. didn’t.

[Batman (1940) #650]

I like Under the Hood and Lost Days well enough except for the Jason/Talia ugh. Problem is, DC obviously had no idea what to do with Jason after that, so his relationship with Bruce stays at a status quo.

Post-resurrection Jason isn’t so much estranged family than an antagonist who makes some cool appearances here and there— when they’re not so terribly written that they make me cringe.

There are some other interesting things here and there, giving depth to Jason’s estrangement from Bruce & the batfam…

[Green Arrow (2001) #72]

… but those elements are few and far between, and fail to establish a solid construction/development of any kind between Jason and Bruce. UtH!Jason put on some interesting bases but afterwards? Jason as a character is stagnating, and so is his relationship with any member of the batfam.

And then there’s the n52 & Rebirth I guess. It obviously wants to deliver a father-son narrative, but doesn’t do great job at it. Again, aside from a few cute scenes, the “he’s my son but he does baaaad things” eternal dilemma, and Jason’s newfound proximity with the batfam coming out of nowhere (especially with Tim wtf), I didn’t find much content to have a solid opinion on.

(Salty) conclusion

My opinion of Jason & Bruce’s father-son relationship is that it’s hella cute pre-Starlin and that Winick’s version of it makes sense within his Under the Hood & Lost Days narrative (I personally cut out “bad seed Jason” and keep most of the rest).

I think we lost a lot of potential when Starlin’s work became the reference. I think the Red Hood and his baggage with the whole fam could’ve been richer and more interesting if Jason’s initial characterization was kept in mind.

Yes, Jason and Bruce’s initial relationship could’ve used some more tension/conflict in between the sweet moments but… as far as I’m concerned Starlin’s writing wasn’t the way to go.

I think the only way to build a coherent interpretation of Jason & his relationship with the fam is to make a patchwork of canon elements and to fill in the blanks yourself. Thus what I have on Jason & Bruce that takes the Red Hood into account isn’t so much an “opinion” on canon material than a personal construction.

I’m sorry Anon, I bet that’s not what you expected when you sent that ask, but it’s all I have to give :’) Hope the answer is still okay & thanks for the ask!

[liluwrites]

Sugar High

Characters: Lithuania x Poland, N. Italy

Word Count: 3k

Summary: Feliks knows how to handle the highs and lows of his diabetes, and the complications that come with it. But romance is another matter entirely – and when a kind stranger stops to help him in the street, he finds himself thrown into the chaos of awkwardness, flirting, and the possibility of second chances. A huge thank you to @gnostic-heretic and @lotusdumpling for beta reading this fic, you guys are awesome!

It’s not entirely a surprise when his body decides to try to kill him.

He’s been feeling it coming for the best part of an hour, but there’s not much he can do to stave off the oncoming hypo when he’s in a lecture with a professor who whips around at the sound of a package crinkling or the barely audible hiss of a carbonated drink. Most professors are fairly chill, but this one won’t even let him bring coffee without a vicious glare. Perhaps if Feliks were less awkward, he would argue his (extremely valid) point that he has diabetes and without access to food he could, well, die. But he’s a socially anxious mess, so instead he stays quiet and tries not to pass out. Once the lecture is finally over, he stands shakily and heads for his dorm. Feliciano will already be home, and the moment they see him they’ll be bombarding him with Lucozade and far too many slices of toast. He smiles at the thought. Feliciano is ridiculously motherly for a nineteen-year-old, and Feliks wouldn’t change them for the world. Unfortunately, he doesn’t make it to Feliciano, because by the time he’s turning the corner to head towards the dorm, his head starts swimming and his legs quiver, and he finds himself slowly sinking to sit against the brick wall with his head ducked between his knees. With trembling hands, he reaches for his monitoring kit and clicks the needle against the pad of his index finger, then waits for the reading. 2.8 He sucks in a breath. Not good. Very not good. Especially sitting alone against a wall on a quiet afternoon on campus, with no one around to offer help. The humid air is closing in around him, suffocating, and perhaps if he called out someone would come to him - but he can’t, he can’t, he can’t. He can’t bear for anyone to see him like this. He just needs Feliciano. But his phone had died partway through the lecture, and his dorm is around a corner and up six flights of stairs, and there’s no way he can get there without collapsing. He can feel his heart stuttering in his chest, and his skin is prickling, although he can’t tell if it’s from anxiety or because this is the worst hypo he’s had in a while and he might actually fucking die. He’s gonna die. Oh fuck, he’s gonna die he’s gonna die he’s gonna die – “Are you alright?” The voice sounds strange, as if it’s coming from underwater. Feliks looks up and sees a face leaning over him, unfocused – pale skin and soft brown hair and green eyes - and then there’s a hand reaching out and hovering above him, as if they want to touch him but don’t quite dare. “Do you need, uh, water or anything?”

 He closes his eyes briefly and forces another breath into his leaden lungs. “Won’t help.”

 “Shit, what can I do to help you? I don’t know how to help you.”

 The urgency in his voice makes Feliks’ throat tighten. “Juice,” he whispers.

 “I - what? Oh, shit, yeah, I’ve got juice, is orange okay?” Feliks resists the urge to roll his eyes. “Right, let me just - “ There’s the thump of a backpack hitting the ground, followed by rummaging and muffled curses, and then he’s pressing something into Feliks’ palm, something small and square with sharp corners – a juice box!

With a wave of almost nauseating relief, Feliks takes the plastic straw in his lips and sucks. The orange juice is sticky and acidic against his tongue. It makes him feel slightly sick, but he’s never been more grateful. Thank god for kind strangers. “Does that help?” The tentative voice sounds again, closer this time. Feliks looks up. The kind stranger is crouching in front of him, his backpack lying on the ground at his feet. He’s watching him intently with concerned eyes. “You don’t need an ambulance, do you?” Feliks shakes his head. The movement feels heavy and syrupy, but everything is slightly more focused now – and yeah, maybe he’s not going to die, after all. Anxiety brain can be a bitch. “No, I’m okay. This happens a lot.” This makes Kind Stranger look even more alarmed. “A lot? I don’t think that’s normal.” Despite his kind of pathetic situation, he chokes a laugh. “It’s fine. I have diabetes. Hypos aren’t great, but I can deal with them.” “Oh, okay.” He seems relieved by this information. “I was worried it might’ve been because of the heat. Heatstroke can be pretty serious.” Feliks gives him a wan smile. “So can diabetes.” He immediately feels guilty when Kind Stranger recoils, stricken. “Oh no, I didn’t mean it isn’t serious! I’m so sorry, of course it’s serious! I just meant – “ “It’s okay, I was joking.” “Oh…haha…” Kind Stranger rubs the back of his neck awkwardly. “Even so, I’m sorry. I can be pretty tactless. I’m not great with people.” Feliks looks at his earnest expression and wonders why someone like him wouldn’t be popular. Surely his kindness should attract good friends like moths to a light. “Seriously, you’re fine. Neither am I. I’m not good at talking to strangers.” Kind Stranger cracks a tiny smile. “You’re talking to me.” Feliks smiles back. “I guess I am.” He reaches over and lightly taps the juice box. “Drink some more. You’re still shaking.” Obediently, he pokes the straw back into his mouth and takes another sip. “You sound like my roommate. They always fuss.” “I think I have a right to fuss,” he says, with a defensive pout that is actually kind of cute. “You almost passed out in front of me.” “Touché.” They fall silent, and Feliks concentrates on sipping at his juice box and feeling the consciousness return to his body. Kind Stranger sits quietly in front of him, watching him with soft eyes and a gentle smile. Feliks can’t meet his gaze without blushing. He’s very cute, he thinks, despite his ugly sweater vest and bitten-down nails. Feliks wouldn’t mind seeing him again, perhaps in better circumstances. “What’s your name?” He asks impulsively. Kind Stranger blinks. “Uh, Toris. Laurinaitis. I’m an astrophysics major.” “Your name is almost as bad as mine. Feliks Łukasiewicz. I study Literature.” “Oh, Literature. That must be interesting.” Feliks grins at him. “You think it sounds terrible, don’t you?” Toris’ eyes widen and he holds out his hands in defence. “No, no! It’s just, my dyslexia makes reading kind of difficult for me, but I’m sure as an area of study it’s fascinating – “ “If it’s any consolation, science makes me want to cry.” “Honestly? Same.” They both laugh. “But it's the closest I'll ever get to my childhood dream of going into space.” Feliks blinks at him. “Why can't you? Follow your dreams and all that.” He taps the thin wire rim of his glasses. “Don’t have 20/20 vision.” “I don’t think I could go into space either,” he consoles him. “Anyway, I cry on rollercoasters, I'm not sure I could handle a rocket.” Toris pulls a face. “I went on a rollercoaster once. Never again.” Feliks laughs and drains the last drops of his juice box. He’s feeling a lot better now – a little weak and shaky, perhaps, but no longer on the verge of death. A warm shower and a slice of Feliciano's home-made pizza sounds perfect right now, but more than that, he doesn’t want to stop talking. “Toris,” he says gravely, looking him straight in the eye. “I have something serious to ask you, something that could make or break our friendship.” “Our – ? Oh, okay!” Toris flushes slightly, looking pleased. He swallows. “Go ahead.” He seems slightly terrified, but Feliks can't help but drag out the silence teasingly, before he asks, “In your professional opinion, does Pluto still count as a planet?” Toris sits up straight. “Pluto will always be a planet. Fight me.” “I like you.” Perhaps he wouldn’t normally be so blunt, but his mind still feels hazy and scrambled. “Yeah, I definitely like you.” “Thank you?” Toris says, and he’s a blushing mess, and Feliks might be slightly in love. Awkwardly, Toris casts his eyes about for a distraction. “Are you feeling better?” Feliks smiles. Toris is definitely like Feliciano. “I'm fine now, seriously.” He unpacks his monitor and checks again. “Look, 3.9. That’s almost normal.” “Oh.” Hesitantly, he asks, “Doesn’t it hurt? The needle? Oh no, was that an insensitive question? I'm sorry – “ He laughs and cuts him off. “Don’t worry, you’re fine. It doesn’t hurt anymore, I've been doing it since I was eight. You get used to it.” “I guess you would,” Toris says. “You can get used to anything.” Toris’ phone chimes, and he swipes a finger across the screen and rolls his eyes fondly. “Oh, for God’s sake, Alfred.” “Who's Alfred?” A boyfriend? he wonders, looking at the affectionate expression on his face. “My roommate. He's an idiot and a dickhead but I love him.” “Oh, your roommate. Good.” That strikes a chord in Feliks' mind as he suddenly remembers; “Oh, fuck! Feliciano! They’ll be worried.” “I can message them,” Toris offers, already whipping out his phone again. Feliks sighs in relief and gives him Feliciano's number. “Just tell them I'm outside the dorm and I had a hypo.” Barely two minutes later, Feliciano arrives, half-running with their phone in one hand and a bottle of Lucozade in the other. They reach them and scoop Feliks into such a tight hug they lift him bodily from the ground, then pull back to say, Why didn’t you message me sooner? You frightened me! Drink this. They thrust the Lucozade at him, and Feliks smiles and pushes it gently away. I'm okay, T-O-R-I-S gave me a juice box. I’m fine, I promise. Feliciano eyes him critically. T-O-R-I-S? Feliks gestures to Toris, who is lingering beside them with an awkward half-smile. He found me here and stayed with me and gave me some juice, he’s really kind! And he studies astrophysics, and he doesn’t like rollercoasters either, and! And he knows that Pluto’s still a planet. Feliciano gives him a sideways look, smiling knowingly. Feliks blushes and rolls his eyes. Licking their lips nervously, Feliciano turns to Toris and clears their throat. “Thank you for looking after Feliks,” they enunciate carefully. Their intonation is slightly irregular, but otherwise their speech is very clear, and Feliks gives them a proud smile. Toris nods, looking equally nervous, then hesitantly curves his hand in towards his chest. You’re welcome. Feliks grins as he watches Feliciano’s face light up. Toris clearly isn’t fluent in ASL, or anywhere close, but just the effort is enough to make Feliciano overjoyed, and he can literally feel himself falling for Toris. Anyone who makes his best friend smile like that is someone special. Feliciano flings their arms around Toris, who looks startled but pleased as he hugs them back. Carefully, Feliciano eases Feliks up from the wall and steadies him when his head spins, and Toris picks up his bag off the ground and helps him hang it over his shoulder. He checks his levels again, and he’s pretty much normal now, but he’s dying for some carbs. They linger at the corner for a moment, neither of them wanting to leave. “You can come up to the dorm with us, if you want,” Feliks offers impulsively. “Number 132. I bet Feliciano will make you some pizza.” “I will,” they confirm, their voice stronger and more confident. “But not pineapple because that’s blasphemous.” Feliks pulls a face behind their back, and Toris stifles a laugh. “I wish I could, but I’ve already missed half a lecture.” A spear of guilt stabs into him. “Shit, I’m sorry.” “Don’t apologise!” Feliciano and Toris exclaim in unison. They smile at each other, and Toris continues, “Seriously, it’s fine. I’m glad I had the chance to meet you, Feliks.” “You, too.” And then Toris is waving at them and walking away, and Feliks is not expecting the sadness that washes over him, because he doesn’t want this to be an ending. Rationally, he knows that Toris only stopped to help him because he’s a kind person, and now the crisis is averted, he has no obligation to stay in his life – but he’d felt something between them, and it hurts a little to think that Toris didn’t feel feel the same. He wants to call out to him, but Toris is already turning the corner and Feliciano is guiding him into the elevator in the lobby, and everything is back to normal. So, Feliciano says as soon as the elevator doors slide shut. T-O-R-I-S, hm? Feliks just sighs and shakes his head, pushing their hands away. Feliciano shrugs. Pizza, then? Feliks gives them a weak smile. Yeah, pizza. Extra pineapple. You heathen. Feliks laughs half-heartedly. His mind is still distracted with thoughts of Toris, and the regret of fuck, he should’ve got his number. Yeah, this is definitely an ending. With a sigh, he follows Feliciano into the dorm and shuts the door behind them. *** Feliks has no classes the next day, so he rises late and spends the morning padding around the dorm in his pink bathrobe, sipping at a decaf americano. He has a ton of work to do, but it’s one of those beautiful summer mornings with silky white light making patterns against the floorboards, and he wants to lament elegantly over his lost chance at romance like a tragic heroine. Feliciano, a revoltingly cheerful morning person, makes them both pancakes, then sprawls on their stomach on the floor, taking advantage of the perfect lighting to snap aesthetic photos of flowers for their Instagram. It’s a quiet, lazy Saturday, so Feliks is totally unprepared for the knock at the door. Expecting it to be some idiot from next door wanting to borrow detergent or something, he drags himself off the couch and slouches over to the door, tugging it open with a yawn. “Yes?” Then he freezes. “Oh, shit, Toris.” In an instant, his mind registers exactly how he must look; tattered pink gown, chipped nail polish, barefoot, bedhead – an utter mess. He kind of wants to slam the door in Toris’ face, but that would be a dick move, and his heart has already leapt into his throat at the sight of him. Toris’ shy smile drops slightly. “Oh…did I come at a bad time? Sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude.” “Wait, no, fuck, I am happy to see you. I’m really happy to see you. I just look disgusting right now.” “I think you look fine,” Toris says earnestly, and Feliks feels his face heat up. “Um, I just wanted to make sure you were okay?” Feliks blinks at him. “Why wouldn’t I be?” “Well, you know,” he shifts his feet uncomfortably. “After yesterday. I wanted to check that you’re feeling better.” He stares at him for a moment, then splutters with laughter and pushes him playfully. “Oh, Toris! Hypos don’t last that long – I’m fine, see? I was fine right after I got back to the dorm.” “Oh.” His face is flushed, but he manages a tiny rueful grin. “Sorry, I don’t know very much yet. I googled it, you know. Diabetes. I wanted to know what to do if something happened again, how to help in the future.” Feliks looks at him with wide eyes, lost and confused and a little hopeful. “In the future?” If possible, Toris’ face turns even more red. “I mean, only if you want to, of course. But like, I thought maybe you’d want to hang out again, as friends or – more? Shit, sorry, that’s going way too fast. But – I thought you might want to get coffee with me?” He says the last part in a rush, merging his words together and focusing intently on the ground. For a moment, Feliks is stunned. Then, slowly, a smile spreads across his face. “Hey, Toris.” He waits until he looks up at him. “I would love to.” Toris’ whole posture relaxes in relief, and his face lights up like the sun appearing through the clouds. “When?” “This afternoon?” Toris nods eagerly. “Yes, please, this afternoon.” “Okay, this afternoon.” “Okay.” “Okay.” They stand there for a long moment, grinning at each other like idiots. Feliks’ face hurts from smiling so much. He feels like he could stay like this forever, lingering in the doorway to his dorm, but he can’t help but ruin the moment. “Maybe okay will be our always.” Toris groans and pushes him in the chest, and he stumbles back a step, laughing. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” “You should be.” And then they’re laughing again, and Feliks is asking, “Do you want to come in? You can have a pancake.” “Why do you always bribe me with food, Feliks Łukasiewicz?” He absolutely butchers his last name, but Feliks doesn’t care. It’s cute, coming from Toris. “What else would you like me to bribe you with?” He wriggles his eyebrows seductively, and Toris groans again and flushes deeply. It’s adorable how easily he blushes. “So do you want to come in?” “I’m really sorry, I wish I could, but I’m meeting Alfred and his boyfriend for an early lunch.” He smiles regretfully. “But I’ll see you this afternoon, yeah?” He smiles back. “Yeah.” “Okay.” “Okay.” Toris smirks. “Okay.” “Go away.” Feliks pushes him out of the doorway, laughing. “Go eat lunch. I’ll see you later.” “Goodbye, Feliks.” Toris waves at him as he turns down the corridor. “I’ll see you.” He waits until Toris has started to walk down the stairs, then slams the door shut and spins to face Feliciano. His roommate is standing behind him, hands on their hips and a delighted grin plastered across their face. I don’t believe it. My baby has a date! You’re barely a year older than me, he protests. Feliciano just tuts and opens their arms. Feliks runs to them, flings his arms around their neck, and spins them both around in the middle of the floor, faster and faster until they’re dizzy and breathless, because Feliks has a date. With Toris Laurinaitis. And nothing, he thinks, could be better than that. *** He arrives at the coffee shop at just past four o’clock. Although Feliciano has done everything to make him feel brave – repainting his nails a pastel pink, dabbing his lips with shimmering gloss and a touch of silver sparkles on his eyelids, picking out a perfectly-coordinated ‘casual’ outfit from their combined wardrobes and completing it with a silk scarf draped elegantly around his neck – he’s trembling a little, and he waits outside the shop for a few minutes, taking deep breaths to compose himself. Through the wide window, he can see Toris sitting at a table for two. It’s reassuring to see that he looks as nervous Feliks feels – he’s fidgeting with his clasped hands, chewing on his lower lip and glancing anxiously towards the door. Perhaps he thinks Feliks isn’t coming. Perhaps he thinks Feliks has lied to him, stood him up, or has even just forgotten. As if he could forget. He’s been thinking about this all day, as Feliciano danced around him, getting him all dressed up and pretty. He looks down at his outfit, smiling. A light coral shirt combined with his cropped denim jacket with silver buttons and his Pride pin, a pair of Feliciano’s shorts, and white sandals that show off his freshly-painted toenails. A butterfly-printed canvas handbag containing his phone and wallet and insulin pen is slung casually over one shoulder. He takes a deep breath. You look beautiful, Feliciano had told him resolutely before he had left. Even more beautiful than usual. Stunning. Gorgeous. Eye-catching. Absolutely magnificent – Shut up! He had complained, giggling, but he’s grateful for the compliments now. If Toris had thought he looked good in his ancient bathrobe, or when he was doubled over on the street trying not to pass out, then surely he’ll like him in this. Hopefully, he’ll like him in anything. He walks to the entrance and pauses. Lowers his shoulders, straightens his back, lifts his chin high. Then, he summons all his strength and steps through the doorway. The way Toris looks at him makes everything okay. His face lights up, radiant, his smile so bright it makes him glow. His hair falls to his shoulders in loose waves, a deep chestnut brown highlighted bronze in the afternoon sunlight. Feliks could look at him forever; his hair, his smile, his eyes. And as he walks towards him, pulls out a chair, sits down, his heart is buzzing with the thought that this isn’t an ending after all: it’s only the beginning. Fin.

[musicprincess655]

Shunpei wasn’t sure what to expect when he went back to the manor. Anything seemed fair game, honestly. He was still reeling from the idea that his mother might want him back at all.

Sitting across from her in the kitchen, pink hair soft around her face and a sweatshirt thrown over the thin shirt she wore under her suit, wasn’t helping his feeling of dissociation. Maybe this really was all some dream.

Shunpei didn’t see Alfred anywhere, but that didn’t mean much. He was probably somewhere, waiting for an opportune time to step in. The three years Shunpei had lived in the manor had convinced him that Alfred had evolved beyond the need for sleep.

“Why are you just staring?” he asked. Maybe it was an interrogation technique.

“Sorry.” She smiled to herself, just a little, looking almost sheepish. “You just...you grew up.”

Shunpei blinked. Apparently his brain finally got the message. He hadn’t been able to drop the image of her as Batman, not until now. Before, she’d been fighting her, and even when he’d seen her face, he couldn’t escape the way she’d always seemed larger than life, despite not even clearing his shoulder.

But she’d never just been Batman. For three years, she’d also been his mother.

“I was gone for...what, almost two years?” he asked. Somewhere in the back of his mind, it registered that his seventeenth birthday had been recent. “That happens.”

“I never thought I’d get the chance to see it,” she said. “So. What’s your side of the story?”

“I’m sure you know most of it,” he said. “Talia al Ghul brought me back after I died. I wanted to come home immediately, she convinced me to stay, I left a few months ago anyway, and here we are.”

“How did she convince you to stay?” his mother asked.

“She told me you’d never let me avenge myself,” Shunpei said. “She offered to teach me how to do it myself. I didn’t even realize the Joker was dead until I left.”

His voice twisted bitter at the end. There had been more than one reason he hadn’t gone straight home as soon as he left Talia.

“You’re angry I let Ryou do it,” she guessed. Somehow, it only made him angry that she was so close.

“I’m angry that you didn’t,” he snapped. “Ryou never liked me, but you told me I was your son. I was your partner, at least. Why wouldn’t you avenge me yourself? Was I ever worth anything to you?”

“Of course you were,” she snapped right back. “Shun-chan, I loved you just as much as I love your brothers. I mourned you, we all did.”

“Then why wouldn’t you do anything about it?” Shunpei demanded. “Why is it okay for Ryou to kill the Joker?”

“Because I can’t!”

“Why? Because of that moral compass of yours?” Shunpei laughed without any humor. “Is it really that hard to kill someone who deserved it as much as him?”

“Of course not!” Shunpei finally stopped, really looking at her. Her cheeks were flushed, her eyes surprisingly pleading. “It would be so easy.”

“It...what?”

“You think I didn’t want the Joker’s head on a spike after you died?” she asked. “You think I didn’t want to reduce him to a bloody puddle? Of course I wanted him dead. But there’s no going back for me if I cross the line.”

“I’m not asking to kill everyone,” Shunpei said softly. “I’m not asking for you to kill Penguin, or Scarecrow, or Black Mask. Just Joker. Just the person who hurts so many people, who’ll keep hurting people until he’s dead. Just the one who killed your son.”

“I know,” she said. “But that’s not the point. Ryou could kill the Joker, and then stop. You could’ve killed the Joker, and you could stop after.”

Shunpei’s eyes widened.

“But you couldn’t?”

“If I crossed the line, I would never come back,” she said. “I’d never want to. And Gotham...this world wouldn’t bear it, if I was a killer.”

Shunpei didn’t think he’d ever seen his mother like this. He’d put her on a pedestal, thought of her as some untouchable titan. But in the end, she was human, too.

“You know, I’ve made a lot of mistakes as a mother,” she went on. “You died, Ryou left, and I’m sure I’m messing something else up with Haruichi and the girls. I’ve made more mistakes than I could possibly count. But there’s one thing I can be proud of.” She smiled sadly as she tucked her hair behind her ear. “None of you ended up as broken as me.”

Shunpei was a little too busy processing that for a second to respond, and when he did, it probably wasn’t what she was expecting.

“The girls?”

That made her laugh for real.

“Their names are Yui and Sachiko,” she said. “Turns out I have a habit of bringing home strays. I found them a lot like I found you.”

“Trying to steal the wheels of the Batmobile?” Shunpei asked, grinning in spite of himself. The memory was funny now, the way he’d seen Batman coming back to see him stealing her wheels, and he’d been so sure he was going to die. Instead, he’d found himself at a fancy mansion, given as much food as he could eat, and the training he needed to become Robin.

“Nothing so dramatic,” she said. “They’re both daughters of villains, and both of them rejected their parents. Eventually, they found their way here. If I believed in magic, I’d call it fate.”

Shunpei delicately didn’t point out that he’d come back from the dead, which seemed pretty magical.

“You’ll meet them soon enough,” she continued. “We left your room alone.”

“About that,” Shunpei said, lifting his hand to his hair self-consciously. “I’m grateful. I really am. I didn’t think you’d take me back like this at all. But…”

“You want your own space,” she finished for him.

“It’s easier to work the way I do if I’m closer to the ground,” he said. “And I’ve been on my own for so long, I don’t think I could just go back to living with people.”

“You’re more similar to your brother than I think you realize,” she said. “Speaking of, do you really think Ryou hates you?”

“He told me he did,” Shunpei said. “Maybe he backed off a little after I was here for a while, but he never liked me.”

“I think he’d surprise you,” she said. “But even if you don’t move back in, will you still come for dinner sometimes?”

“I...of course.” Shunpei was still reeling from the fact that he got to have his family back.

“And stick around for long enough to tell everyone you’re alive,” she said. “Ryou already knows, and I think Haruichi and the girls suspect something’s up. They’ll all want to see you.”

“I want to tell my old team as well,” he said. He wasn’t actually sure what had become of them, but he knew Young Justice didn’t exist anymore.

His mother made a face. There was no way to do that without revealing his identity, but Shunpei was okay with that. There were some secrets he didn’t want to keep from the people close to him anymore.

“Haruichi is out with the girls tonight, and I’m sure Ryou is with his team,” she said. “I’ll let them all know to call it a night.”

Alfred chose that moment to walk into the kitchen.

“Good evening, Miss Aya,” he said. “Master Shunpei, I was just thinking about baking a batch of those cookies you used to like so much.”

Shunpei might have made a small orgasmic noise. Alfred’s cookies. He was definitely coming back for dinner. Maybe once a week. At least.

“Everyone’s coming back,” his mother cut in. “At least, Haruichi, Ryou, Yui, and Sachiko are all coming. I’m not sure how many former Young Justice members got the memo.”

Shunpei hung around in the kitchen with Alfred, trying to pretend he wasn’t panicking a little at seeing everyone again. He’d been on his own for so long, and now he was about to be surrounded by people. He had no idea what he wanted to say to them, but he couldn’t wait to see them anyway.

Haruichi got back first, bounding up into the kitchen ahead of two girls that must have been Yui and Sachiko. His hood was already down, and his hair was cut back to reveal his eyes. He froze when he saw Shunpei.

“Hey,” Shunpei said. He was almost nervous that it would become awkward, but then Haruichi was throwing himself into Shunpei’s arms with a cry of “Shun-chan!”

Shunpei hugged him back. His relationship with Haruichi had always been so simple, and he’d missed his little brother.

When Haruichi jumped down, Shunpei looked up to take in the girls, and saw Ryou had come in behind them. He was just unpinning the black hood he used to cover his pink hair, which wasn’t going to give Shunpei nearly enough time to prepare for this.

As easy as Shunpei’s relationship with Haruichi had been was as complicated as his relationship with Ryou was. He expected a joke, or a dig, or something sideways and squinty that would be just the wrong side of mean, or…

Ryou hooked an arm around his shoulders, pulling him down into an awkward hug.

“Uh.”

“I’m glad you’re not dead.” Shunpei stared. Coming from Ryou, that was an expression of the highest affection.

“Thanks for avenging me,” Shunpei said. Ryou waved his hand.

“No trouble,” he said. “Don’t need avenging again.”

Shunpei wasn’t done feeling like his life had entered an alternate dimension when the old members of Young Justice walked in. All of them.

This would be interesting, considering he’d been instructed to keep his identity a secret from them. They’d never really known what he looked like.

A girl removing her tiger mask caught his attention first, and her eyes widened in shock. Shunpei gave her a half smile. All of Young Justice hadn’t known his identity, but Katsuko had met him before he ever became Robin.

She made a tiny sobbing sound, throwing herself forward into a hug. Shunpei cradled her close. The last time they’d seen each other, she’d still been taller than him.

“Hey guys,” he said, addressing the rest of his old team. “Sorry for dying on you.”

He saw the light of recognition in Wakana’s eyes first, saw it in the way that she breathed “Robin”, and then everyone was launching themselves at him, sending them all into a heap on the floor.

And Shunpei started laughing, because there was none of the awkward transition he’d feared. This was his old team, these were his friends, and in some ways, it was like he’d never left.

It might get harder soon, as he explained what had happened and heard their stories, but for now, he could take comfort in having people he belonged with again.

[differentjokes4differentfolks]

WTFIT Chap 10

Chapter ten!! I think it’s safe to say the fic is more than halfway done :) As always, thanks for the comments and likes/reblogs. I’m glad y’all like the story. Enjoy!!

Bruce swears if Vicki Vale was a villain she’d be unstoppable. He spends an hour alone trying to dodge her questions, his phone ringing incessantly (How did she even get his number?). When the mob of reporters shows up on his front step he tries to have Alfred shoo them away, but they’re like vultures. The camera flashes annoy him to no end, you don’t need camera flashes in broad daylight anyway (he thinks). The interview goes on for about an hour. He doesn’t mind some of the questions, no, he’s not straight, yes, he’ll donate to LGBT organizations (he donates to them anyways). But some are insulting and honestly? Some are just straight up kinky. He ends up just staring at one reporter after a certain question about leather, at a loss for words. So, in a curt fashion he ends the interview, loosening his tie as he enters the manor and heaving a sigh of relief.

“What was that about?” Dick asks, dressed to head out to Barbara’s. His hair looks stiff with gel, which makes Bruce frown and mess it up. Dick protests but Bruce cuts him off.

“You look better like this,” he says, “You’re not going to an interview, you’re going to hang out with your girlfriend.”

“Fine. But why was the press here?”

“Why do they ever show up? For information and uncomfortable conversations.” Dick looks confused, so he decides to enlighten him. “People saw me dancing with a man yesterday at that restaurant and Gotham was in an uproar.”

Dick blinks. “You’re gay? Or bi?”

“Maybe. Probably.” Bruce laughs awkwardly. Dick shrugs.

“So what? Why do they have to make a big deal out of nothing?” He kneels down to tie his shoelaces. “I mean, it’s just who you love, not that world-changing. You should call them when you find out who Batman really is,” he jokes.

Bruce hums in agreement. “So what do you and Barb have planned?”

Standing up, Dick runs a hand through his already messed up hair. “You know, I was thinking we could sightsee. Or maybe watch a movie. Or stay at home and do something. I’m not picky.”

An idea springs into Bruce’s head. “Take her to a cafe. There’s a great one across Wayne Tower, they have really good cheesecake.”

“Really?” Dick furrows his brow. “I think I know which one you’re talking about. You’ve gone? Doesn’t seem like your kind of venue.”

“I had nothing else to do. And if I hadn’t gone I would’ve missed out.” He edits out the real story, but the last bit is true.

“Alright. Well, I should go. I’m taking the Lamborghini.”

Bruce raises an eyebrow. “Don’t get it scratched up.”

“C’mon Bruce, you know me.” Dick winks. Yes, he does. As skilled a driver as he is, he’s still totaled a couple of Bruce’s best cars. “I’ll be back before nightfall.” He exits, leaving Bruce to slip out of his coat. Today is going to be a relaxing day, he promises himself. No going out, no phone calls, no anything. His eyes are half-shut when he falls onto the couch.

And then his phone rings.

With a groan Bruce looks at the caller ID. No name; it could be anyone really. Fine. He answers.

“Hello?”

“So I heard you were in the East End last night.” Selina. Bruce can hear the annoyance in her voice.

“I had a good reason. Scarecrow and Black Mask were there. They were going to poison the water system if I didn’t stop them.” Bruce turns on the TV, idly clicking on the remote.

“Really. And you didn't tell me?”

“I had a lot on my mind.” He stops flipping at a Harry Potter marathon. How many times have they marathoned this on TV in the past couple months? It’s almost constantly running. And if he’s exaggerating, it’s not by much. He leaves it on as background noise.

“Look, I appreciate you stopping them. Just tell me next time. When I saw Nightwing there I was about ready to knock him out. Didn't he tell you?”

He’d failed to mention that, actually. “Did he explain why?”

“Yes. I don’t like this, Bruce. It’s been so long since something like this has happened. Don’t get me wrong, taking a few millionaires down a peg or three doesn’t sound awful. But killing them all?”

“I know. But I’m going to fix it.”

“Tell me when you’re done, maybe we can do something, it’s awfully cold and the fireplace is roaring,” she purrs. Bruce rolls his eyes, but he can’t help a smile.

“You don’t have a fireplace.” The woman on the other end of the line laughs, and Bruce joins in. Once the laughter fades he says, “I’ll see you later, Selina,” the mirth in his voice audible.

“Bye, Batman.” She hangs up, her laugh the last thing Bruce hears before the phone clicks. She’s a valuable friend, he realises. He enjoys her company for what it is, upfront, witty, and relaxed. But it’s just that, that softer feeling of friendship, not unlike what he feels for Clark, or even Jim Gordon. He leans back on the couch, watching as Harry faces off against Voldemort. He can’t help but feel critical. Villains are rarely that one-sided.

Sitting on the couch got boring pretty fast. Countless pushups and crunches later and he feels more productive, though when he checks the clock it’s only eleven in the morning. What could he do to pass time? He glances at the phone. His finger taps at the leather of the couch rapidly. It might not be a good idea. It probably isn’t a good idea. But…

He turns on his phone, Joker’s number already in the contacts. The phone rings once...twice…

“Hello?” Damn, he’s not ready for this. It feels too casual all of a sudden. He hesitates. Joker’s voice is bright though. “Bats, is that you?”

“Hi, Joker.”

“It’s been a while.” It really hasn’t, it’s only been a few hours, but Bruce isn’t about to tell him that. “Oh, have you seen the newspaper, dear? We look amazing.”

“You saw that?”

“Saw it? I scrapbooked it!” Bruce can imagine the smug look on Joker’s face. He also thinks he knows the man enough that yes, he did in fact scrapbook it. He’s seen pictures up on the walls of his hideouts before, newspaper clipping and old Batman sightings from when he was just getting started. He still doesn’t know how to respond. It’s strange. “...You did call me, Batsy. Getting cold feet?”

“No.” Bruce’s defensiveness spikes. “You sound like you’re in a good mood, though.”

“Oh, I am.” Joker giggles. “Can’t compare to whenever I see your devilish good looks, but it’s a close second.” Shameless flirting. Okay. He can deal with this.

“Miss me?”

“Always.” Bruce can hear the smile in Joker’s voice. “My other half, the one who beats the crap out of me whenever I wreak havoc. When are we getting back to that, by the way? I miss our little sessions.”

Bruce snorts. “You miss that?”

Joker laughs. “Well that was an attractive sound. And yeah, I do actually.” He sighs. “Don’t you?”

As a matter of fact Bruce does. He hasn’t thought about it much, but it’s true. Fighting on rooftops in the rain, kicks and punches as fluid as a dance. Moves like reflexes. Adrenaline. “Yeah, I guess I do. This is the longest you’ve been around me without an actual fight.”

“Too monotonous.” A voice calls out in the background, Joker’s voice quieter as he tells the speaker to shut up. The voice answers back more animatedly, to which he replies with exasperation. Bruce figures it’s Harley in the background. He waits till the talking stops.

“So? What are you doing? Should I be worried?”

“It’s a secret. You’ll find out soon enough.” There’s a crash on the other end. Bruce frowns.

“What was that?”

“Darling, don’t worry about it. Trust me, you’ll like the surprise. I know I do.”

“If you say so.”

“I do say so.” Another crash. “Gotta go, I’m working right now. Ciao!” Joker ends the call abruptly, Bruce blinking at the short response. He’s suspicious, but knows he won’t get any answers until tonight. He slowly sets the phone down. And wishes the sun was setting.

*

He decides to let Tim come along tonight. He did a fair job in helping him and Dick out last night, and he does keep a level head for the most part. He’ll be working with Jason though, making sure there isn’t anything wrong at the Gotham Observatory, where the Gala will be held. Dick will be coming with him and Joker to the docks, but first he decides to check out Ace chemicals.

The weather is actually nicer today, the night still safe a slight breeze. There’s no report of snow, yet he can see a few flakes drifting in the cold October atmosphere. He breathes in the cold air, the sharp chill of it waking up his senses.

Bruce hasn’t visited Ace Chemicals in months. It hasn’t changed much, the plant only up and running half the time. Recently it’s been closed down for “remodeling”. He assumes that’s still the case, if it’s being used as a base. His instincts tell him it’s rigged in some way, but he won’t know until he gets closer. So he does, grappling to the top and looking in through a window.

The whole place is decked out in greenery, vines twisting about on the floor. Ivy. But there are also hints of something else, more Joker-ish in nature. A colourful box here, some toys strewn about. He purses his lips. Okay, so Joker has a hand in this. This must be the surprise he was talking about. He can’t say he wasn’t expecting it, the way he was talking earlier, and the fact that Harley was there. It’s a challenge. Just not one he has time for.

Bruce glances around, seeing a grate he can enter through. The closer he can get the better.

He’s inside when he hears Joker’s voice through speakers.

“What do you think, Bats? Interesting, right? Just wait.” A laugh.

Bruce takes out a few men, dodging and cutting at vines that rush at him. The factory only holds about a dozen thugs, not counting Harley, Ivy, and Joker. And it isn’t too big a complication. Though Ivy is obviously getting a kick out of it. There are plants everywhere. He can handle it, but those on top of armed henchmen he’s wasting time. He brushes by them, not discriminating, his goal just on the control room.

Harley lands in front of him, grinning. “What’s up, B-man?” She throws a punch, Bruce dodging and retaliating. Her blows don’t land, Bruce avoiding them easily, landing a hit. Harley grits her teeth, but instead of recoiling she uses the momentum for a kick. It hits Bruce’s side. He grunts, but the pain isn’t enough to stop him from knocking her back.

“Get back before I knock you out,” Bruce warns. Harley pretends to think about it.

“I think I’m good, you know? This is way more fun!” She jumps at him, landing a solid kick to his side. Again and Bruce blocks a second kick, knocking her away. She comes back in with a flurry of punches laughing as Bruce tries to block them. It’s when she lands a hit to his jaw that Bruce decides to act, ducking and throwing a punch at her stomach. In her haste to avoid the blow she missteps, and he takes that opportunity to pulls her towards him, twisting her arm behind her back.

She cries out in pain, and that’s when Ivy decides to join in. Large thorns erupt from the ground around them, Bruce stepping back with Harley. He makes quick work of tying her hands together, watching the floor warily.

“Gotta say, this is way more interesting than any movie I’ve seen!” Joker’s voice rings out. Bruce aims a look at the control room, narrowing his eyes. A vine snakes towards him, Bruce cutting it in two with a batarang. When Ivy reveals herself her eyes are blazing.

“How dare you hurt my babies?”

“And me,” Harley calls out. Bruce lets Harley drop to the floor, the woman falling with an “ow”. One of Ivy’s vines picks her up, placing her to a side before rushing at Bruce. He kicks at the plants, making his way closer to Ivy. Leaves slash through the air like throwing knives, a couple knicking Bruce, sharp like papercuts. He pushes on, avoiding thorny barriers and feeling as though he was walking through a deadly jungle.

It’s too late when Ivy realises Bruce has the upper hand, a few steps ahead of her. He knocks her to the ground, hand pinned on her neck. She hisses in anger, but he quickly places a blow to her temple that knocks her unconscious, her plants writhing before dropping to the floor. He glances up at Harley, who pouts.

“You’ll get what’s comin’ to you Batman! Just wait!” Her smile turns sly. Bruce drops Ivy off next to her, making sure they’re both bound tightly enough that they won’t get free any time soon. Time to go up into the control room. He steps over plants on the stairs, the windows streaming light. He guesses whatever he came for is there, as is Joker.

When he walks in there’s no sign of anyone, but he finds schematics of the observatory, as well as explosives and masks. Good, it’s all there. He places a tracker, knowing Joker is behind him the moment he hears a quiet click. He turns slowly. And his reflexes take over to avoid a kick to the head, a flash of purple that rushes past his eyes and causes him to jerk back. Bruce grabs at Joker’s leg, throwing the clown off balance and tossing him across the room. Joker hits the ground laughing, on his hands and knees. He stands up to run at Bruce again, a spark in his eye. Ducking before Bruce can knock him down, Joker doesn’t hesitate in throwing a punch that brings stars to Bruce’s eyes. He lunges again, a quick strike that gives Bruce only seconds to deflect. Another punch, a cuff to the head. He’s aggressive with his attack, Bruce waiting for the opportunity to retaliate. When he does Joker’s leg is just close enough for Bruce to kick at, throwing the man off balance. Bruce pushes him back with a hit to the chest that knocks the breath out of his lungs. Joker stumbles back, giving Bruce the opportunity to pin him against the wall, unable to attack again. The man gives a breathless laugh, eyes level with Bruce's.

“So, now what, Dark Knight?” he asks, resting his forehead against Bruce's. They're both breathing heavily, exchanging breaths in the messy room.

“You realise I'm running out of time, right?” Bruce frowns at Joker's careless little shrug.

“That's what your bat-brats are for, Brucie. You needed a little... distraction.” Joker smirks, Bruce not relaxing his grip. “Don't tell me you didn't enjoy it.” He places his hands on Bruce's waist, sending shivers through his body even through the layer of armor.

“Not the point.” He pulls back a bit, but Joker doesn't let him go, eyes half-lidded. His expression unnerves Bruce, but it also makes his heart beat rapidly, chest still heaving. “What are you doing?”

He barely has time to react as Joker presses his lips to his. Bruce makes a small sound of surprise.

This. This is crazy. He’s thought about it but now that it’s happening it’s all he can do not to short-circuit.  A rush of warmth suddenly hits him and he melts, deepening the kiss and pressing against the wiry man. He cradles Joker’s face in his hand, feeling warmth through his gloves. Joker’s trying not to smile into the kiss, he knows that, he can feel it, that slight pull to his mouth that only makes Bruce want to kiss him more. He tastes of cotton candy and something slightly chemical, a metallic tang that should be a deterrent but isn’t. It’s just something that fits, surprisingly.

Joker loops his arms around to pull Bruce down towards him, nails scratching at his cowl. Bruce almost loses himself completely, but the nagging in his mind reminds him of the task at hand. Which, if he weren’t Batman he would ignore it, but being a hero...

“We have to go,” he tries to say, the words turning to a mumble as Joker recaptures his mouth. Bruce lets himself enjoy a few more seconds before he puts his hand to the wall to steady himself. When he pulls away, Joker lets out a quiet whine of annoyance. “Joker. The docks.” Joker opens his eyes, his makeup more of a mess than usual, his pupils dilated so that only a thin ring of green is visible around them.

“Five more minutes.” He grabs at Bruce, who pushes him away firmly. “Bats.”

“We need to get to the docks, J.” He makes to turn away when Joker tugs him back.

“Wait. You have lipstick on your mouth,” Joker says with a satisfied little smirk. “Now that’s a look I could get used to.” Bruce’s knows his face is flushed but Joker continues, pulling out a handkerchief. “Wouldn’t want your little bat-family to see though.”

He helps Bruce clean it off, Bruce protesting, “You don’t have to say ‘bat’ in front of everything.”

“Well let’s see. Batman, Batmobile, Batsuit, Batarangs, Batwing...kind of a running theme,” Joker points out. Bruce is unable to come up with a good comeback. The clown looks over Bruce until he can’t see any traces of paint. When he’s satisfied he nods, reapplying his own. Their breathing is steadier, though Bruce still feels like he’s floating. It’s an odd, light feeling, his nerves are on fire but in the nicest way possible. He smiles uncertainly at Joker. The man beams before kissing him again lightly. “Alright, we can go to the docks now. Nightwing is going to meet us?”

“That’s the plan.”

They head down the stairs, where they find Harley free of her bonds and cradling Ivy’s head in her lap, Ivy murmuring about how next time they should just plan a picnic at a garden. She glares when she sees Bruce, but Harley’s eyes are on Joker, whose smug expression is clear on his face. She winks at Bruce, who suddenly wants to sprint out of the factory, grapple onto a very tall building, and jump.

Instead he settles for a warning. “If I hear anything else from you two the rest of the week I’m dragging you down to Blackgate myself.”

Harley leans back, smiling crookedly. “We got it, Batman. We’ll be quiet as mice, won’t we, Red?”

“Stop hurting my plants or you’ll be in a body bag, Batman,” Ivy says, the severity of her gaze not lessening. Bruce nods.

“Noted.” He gestures to Joker to get a move on, the clown walking up to the Batmobile before him. They get in, Joker turning the radio on. He cringes when the only thing that plays is the police scanner.

“Please tell me you have music.”

“I don’t have time for music when I’m in this car,” Bruce says, thinking it obvious. He’s not going to jam out to tunes when people are in danger. That’s pure evil.

“It adds to atmosphere! Imagine racing after baddies listening to ACDC! Or maybe some obnoxious pop song, I don’t know. What kind of music do you like?”

Bruce doesn’t reply. Usually he listens to older tracks, unless Dick or Tim plays the newest song. But he doesn’t like anything specific really. Joker looks at him expectantly. “...Eighties music. Journey.”

Joker nods. “Not what I had in mind, but I can see that.” He opens the window, cold air rushing in. Whooping and laughing in delight, he sticks his head out, eyes closed. He only comes back in to ask how fast it can go. Bruce smirks, pushing down on the gas till they’re a blur. Joker finds himself pushed back into his seat, cackling at the rush.

One of the perks of being a vigilante? No one questions when you’re speeding.

*

The docks look the same as they did on Monday, though this time Dick waits for them near the entrance.

“You guys took your time. I’ve been waiting for at least fifteen minutes.”

Bruce glances at Joker, who raises an eyebrow. “There were...complications that held us back. Anyways,” he gestures to the clown. “Lead the way.”

Joker cracks his knuckles, rolling back his shoulder like he’s about to put on a show. “Gladly. Ozzie’s got eyes everywhere, but if we go through the docks he won’t expect it.” He strides into the maze that is the docks, humming the mission impossible theme. Dick looks at Bruce out of the corner of his eyes, but Bruce doesn’t respond, starting after Joker. They’re headed in completely the opposite direction, more towards the shipyards themselves then around the shipping containers, the slight creaking of the ships putting Bruce on edge. It makes complete sense that Penguin would have a ship though. He doesn’t know why, but he feels the need to be extra cautious, some of his worry from earlier this week making a reappearance.

When they arrive where they need to be Joker stops them, holding his arms out. He then points to a large ship that towers over them.

“That’s the one. If Ozzie is there then your job is done,” he says.

Dick squints at him. “Are you trying to jinx us?”

Joker scoffs. “Believe me, if I wanted you to fail you wouldn’t be here right now. I’m rooting for you guys.” He wraps an arm around Bruce, the latter jolting away. Joker just grins.

Dick looks at them oddly. “Right. I’ll just scope around the other side, see if I can find a different way in. Divide and conquer, right?” Bruce inclines his head in agreement.

“Be careful.”

“You too.” Dick runs off, Bruce following him with his eyes until he disappears. He turns to Joker after, crossing his arms. Joker raises his hands defensively.

“I’m not doing anything out of the ordinary you know. You’re the one who gets flustered. It’s a wonder you can keep any secrets.” He pouts. “Maybe you should just tell Grayson.”

Bruce sighs. Joker’s right, but there are more important things to take care of. “I will. After the gala. We need to finish this though, come on.” He sneaks on board, scanning the ship. Oracle hasn’t said anything yet, but he knows it’s just a matter of time. She’s usually on top of this.

Once on the ship they split up, Joker taking on half the men on the ship with ease, if not discretion. But at least the distraction helps Bruce take out his half. He joins Joker at the door, the man wiping blood off his mouth, sticking his tongue out at the flavor.

“These guys aren’t pulling their punches. Kiss it better?” he suggests, waggling his eyebrows.

Bruce rolls his eyes, turning to open the door and enter the ship. This is going to be a thing now, isn’t it. He should’ve expected it. “Later, maybe.” Joker closes the door after him quietly, Bruce just making out the words he murmurs.

“I can live with that.”

*

“How’s it going, Grayson?”

It’s Jason. Dick makes sure no one is around before replying. “It’s all going good. How’s it looking on your end?”

“It’s quiet. If this is where they plan on blowing up the wealthy then they aren’t very prepared. I assume that’s Batman’s doing.”

“Yeah. Hey, I gotta go, I’m on Penguin’s ship.” He hears footsteps coming towards him and hides behind a container, knocking them out the moment they step close enough.

“Yeah, yeah. Tell us if you need help.”

“Sure thing.” Dick shivers as he opens the door, the cold rushing out. Has Cobblepot never heard of heating? Just because your persona is Antarctic doesn’t mean you have to live at negative temperatures. Gotham isn’t even that cold yet either, why is there ice on this ship? Taking the cosplay way too far, Penguin.

The ship itself is huge, more than enough for one man. And henchmen. Dick barrels his way through at least ten just on the first deck, going down through a dark hall. Penguin is most likely in the center of the ship, if at all.

He sneaks through the ballroom, used now as more of a storage area, crates piled haphazardly on the once polished floor. He imagines the rest of the ship looks the same way. The ship creaks as it bobs on the water, Dick wondering just how old it is. Oswald Cobblepot isn’t known for buying things second hand, but it’s worn down. Not suited for a life of crime.

Bruce joins up with him further down, Joker still with him. Since Tim had mentioned the clown acting different Dick’s been studying him. He thinks Tim may have been right. Joker just leans against the wall like it pains him to stand upright, waiting for the next step. His eyes still have a dangerous flicker to them, but Dick isn’t so sure it’s aimed at him anymore.

“Have you found anything?” Bruce asks him. Dick shakes his head.

“No. He’s probably in the lowest part of the ship. It’s been a breeze so far, which worries me.”

“I guess we’ll find out.” Bruce opens the door to the left of the trio, a door that Dick guesses is the boiler. He steps through, not waiting to see if the others follow.

It’s all grey. Cold metal everywhere, not a soul to be seen. Dick tries a different door and finds it locked, going instead through the grate on top. Bruce and Joker come after, and the three find themselves in a small room, another door at the end labeled Office.

“He’s in there?” Joker whispers. “Seems a little drab.”

Bruce does a quick scan. “He’s in there all right. The only thing is I know he wouldn’t just be here alone.” He looks somber, Dick not liking the expression but used to it by now.

“Should we just open the door?”

“You find a back way,” Bruce says. “I’ll go through the door...as a distraction if need be.”

“Shouldn’t be too hard if it’s just Penguin. I’ll wait out here,” Joker says. He slides down the wall, sitting cross legged on the scuffed up carpet. He closes his eyes in something that almost looks like meditation. Dick stares, the man before him more of a puzzle than ever, but he shakes it off. A look at Bruce proves it’s nothing the older man hasn’t seen before.

Dick sighs. “I guess I’ll go now, should be a grate or something right? I’ll tell you when I’m ready.” He exits the tiny outer room, back in the boiler. As it happens, there is an air conditioning system that spans out to the whole ship. And it’s just big enough for Dick to crawl through, frowning at all the dust and trying not to cough.

Penguin’s voice can be heard from somewhere underneath him, and he finds an opening in the corner of the room, where he can see the stout villain on the phone.

“They’ll never know what hit ‘em. This plan is foolproof... Yeah, I got the stuff, that blasted bat took a lot, but we should still have enough...no, it’s not here. You think I’d trust in these idiots enough to keep it safe. Don’t worry, I have it somewhere they won’t find till it’s too late.” Dick listens intently, a spike of worry travelling through him.

If the rest of the supplies he has aren’t here then we’re just wasting time!

He comms Bruce, murmuring “Ready.”

Bruce slams into the door to open it, Penguin jumping up in outrage. This was what Dick always enjoyed, Bruce making an entrance to unsettle the bad guys. Make a scene and people are either so scared or distracted that they won’t know what hit them. He opens the grate quietly and drops down behind Cobblepot.

The villain is obviously angry, but he’s smirking through his cigar all the same. “You think you’re so smart coming here?”

“Where are you keeping your cargo?” Bruce demands, closing in on Penguin’s desk.

“What cargo?” He puffs smoke into Bruce’s face, but his nose barely wrinkles in disgust. He grabs Oswald by the collar. “Alright, alright, I’ll tell you where it is. After this!” He whacks Bruce in the head with the butt of his umbrella, having a heavy swing for such a portly man. Bruce drops Oswald, Dick wrapping his arm around his neck so he can’t move. The man squawks in indignation and surprise.

“Where is it?” Bruce says, glaring.

“It’s too late, you’ll never find it!” Dick tightens his grip on Oswald. “I won’t tell you, you can threaten me all you like! You think I’d just give it up...after all this...? Do you actually think...I wasn’t using everyone as distractions?” His breath comes in short gasps. Bruce nods at Dick, who drops him.

“You’re done here, Oswald.” He ties the man up, Penguin barking curses at him.

“You won’t make it, you’re too late!” Bruce growls, slamming him into the wall. Penguin growls, shaking his head in pain. Dick takes him from Bruce, glancing up at him.

“They’re not at the observatory, Robin and Red Hood would��ve found it by now.”

“I know.” Bruce snarls, punching at the wall. Dick starts, not used to this side of Bruce.

“You know we’ll figure it out, we always do.”

Bruce shakes his head. “I knew something was wrong, but I kept trying to push the feeling away. Bane had a plan, his chemicals, but it fell through. Then with Crane and his toxin, but we took care of it. Maybe... they haven’t been working together at all. Maybe we’ve been on a wild goose chase, and for what?” Dick scrutinises the man.

“Maybe this time you shouldn’t trust your gut. If you think you’re gonna fail what’s the point in trying?” Bruce glances at him. “This isn’t about Joker is it?”

Bruce shakes his head almost vehemently. “No. This is entirely different. I’m just...”

Dick’s seen Bruce go through this before. Though he can be a drama queen at times, he does also get weighed down by the job at times, loathe as he is to admit it. He places a hand on Bruce. “You’re tired. I get it, you can’t always put up a front. Trust me, I’ll be taking a break after this, and so should you. But Batman is bigger than this. And you’re going to have to put aside any uncertainties.”

Bruce stays silent for a long time before he nods. “You’re right. We can do this. We have time. But we won’t get anything done standing around.” He looks at the door, expression resolute.

Dick’s comm goes off before either can move. “Dick?”

“What’s up, Babs?”

“There’s a lot of activity over by the Asylum, might want to take care of that. Tell Bruce.”

“Yeah.” Bruce looks at him questioningly.

“Something’s come up at the asylum. Can anything else go wrong?” He sighs.

Bruce scowls, hand on the doorknob. “We’d better get over there then.” He opens the door.

Dick carries Penguin, who drifts in and out of a daze as they exit the room. Joker’s standing when they get to him.

“Nothing?”

“Just him,” Dick says, gesturing at Penguin. The clown grins, coming over and bending down to look at Penguin. The villain blearily looks at Joker, brow deeply furrowed and a scowl prominent.

“You finally caught him. One less thing to worry about, right?” He taps at Penguin’s head. “Shame he lost his hat though, I wanted a souvenir. What now?”

“I need to find the rest of the supplies, they spread everything around, most were just diversions. Now there’s something going on at Arkham,” Bruce explains, a tinge of anger in his voice.

Joker tilts his head to the side. “So, what are you gonna do about it?”

Bruce clenches his hands into fists. “What else? We’re going to stop this and figure out what’s really going on.”

After all, if he doesn’t there won’t be a Gotham to really save, just rubble and chaos. And maybe Gotham could take it, but Bruce doesn’t want to let it experience that much destruction while he’s still around. He’s got a job to do.

[ncfan-1]

Gotham 04X02, ‘The Fear Reaper’

Things I am looking forward to this episode: Jonathan’s antics, and finding out how the hell Barbara’s still alive. Oh, and Alexander Siddig’s face. Things I do not care about: just about everything else. This is Gotham.

[TW: Torture, abuse, patient abuse, suicide ideation, all the nasty shit implied about Warden Reed turning out to be one hundred percent true]

- First off, last week, I picked up on there being something messed up about Jonathan’s relationship with Warden Reed that went beyond the man being willing to literally sell him to a couple of goons. I had at the time assumed that this wasn’t the first time Reed had done something like this to him, but some other bloggers, when they posted their commentary of ‘Pax Penguina’, raised a likelihood that, while worse, unfortunately also happens to make a lot more sense. I’ll be interested to see if the worries they raised play out in ‘The Fear Reaper.’

- We open at the old Crane house. Sure took you long enough to get there, Gordon (Though since he’s talked to Merton, I’m assuming—hoping—that they know now that Jonathan didn’t go with those guys willingly).

- Okay, when I saw Grady up on that scarecrow frame, I laughed. I cackled like the inappropriate blogger I am. He’s an asshole and he had it coming, but it’s also just a funny image. Like, how did Jonathan even get him up there? He’s a skinny teenager who, given what a shitshow Arkham is, probably hasn’t gotten too much exercise over the past couple of years, so he’s probably quite weak. Also, Grady’s bigger than him, and probably thrashed around a lot. So… how does this work?

I do have to note that Jonathan did not kill him in favor of doing this to him, though. I note this because he is the villain of the episode pitted against a hero who has committed murder more than once. Okay, granted, Grady seems to have been tied up crucifixion-style, which would have killed him eventually because his lungs would collapse, but Jonathan’s been shut up in Arkham since he was about fourteen, so I’ll bet he doesn’t know that. So, things to keep in mind for the rest of the episode: Our hero has a body count, and our villain, as of the Grady discovery, does not. I do wonder if Jonathan’s going to kill Warden Reed. The episode might try to frame it as a point of no return, but let’s be real, after everything that was both presented and implied about him and his relationship with Jonathan last episode, if anyone has it coming, it’s that slimy fucker.

- Bruce in lock-up, while Gordon tells him that they will be talking about this. And Grady screaming in his cell.

(I love that Bruce’s go-to excuse was that he was looking for Selina.)

- Next, Arkham at lights out, inmates being strapped down to the beds, while Reed is setting papers on fire. Jonathan shows up—scythe in hand—and asks him if he’s covering up his dirty footprints. Oh, shit; the undertones are playing out. Is the show going to do something with this?

- This is satisfying. Well, not the “Jonathan Crane’s dead” part, but the other part. And Reed’s looking at his gun, tried to kill him, but Jonathan got him with the gas first. And does not kill him, I’ll add.

- We’ve confirmed also that Jonathan was in Arkham the whole time since we saw him in Season 1, presumably while Strange was in charge, too. We’ve also confirmed that he wasn’t given any kind of real treatment or therapy, that no one even tried to help him, that he was instead subjected solely to ice baths and electroshock. In a context that makes it clear that this was meant as torture, and not treatment. Great.

- We are going straight into cartoon villain territory, though, if in an “abused teenager violently lashing out” kind of way (It’s very obvious that it’s a child under all those rags and not an adult, even as he’s being hella menacing). I wonder if Jonathan believes everything he’s saying about dear old Dad when he’s not in an altered state of consciousness. I’m not saying it’s impossible for him to still love his dad and have complicated feelings about him, but all of this together is just a little much.

- (Show, if you’re trying to make me not feel sympathetic for Jonathan, it’s not working. Him gassing the patients to make them more volatile is bad, certainly—I don’t approve of it—but it’s nothing on the scale of what certain other characters in this show have done. It feels like a deliberate ploy to make him less sympathetic and more monstrous, instead of something he might have done organically, and I don’t appreciate being manipulated this way.)

- “Play nice.” “No.” For once, I’m inclined to be sympathetic to Gordon, since Oswald dragged the fucking press down to the precinct to bear witness to their argument.

- I’m not surprised Oswald wants Jonathan found, not after his public humiliation last episode. This does ramp up my sympathy for him, though, which I wouldn’t have thought possible, because Jonathan’s already in the top five of most uncomplicatedly sympathetic characters on this show, and having the local mob boss out for his blood just makes him even more sympathetic, because even as he’s gearing up to raise hell, I worry about what Oswald might do to him.

I am kind of interested to see how Oswald might react if he found out the whole story regarding Jonathan. If anyone might feel sympathy for the kid, it would be him, if only because the “got shut up in Arkham and had a bad fucking time” part of his story would ring a lot of bells for Oswald Cobblepot.

- “Like a chicken?” Jesus, Harvey; right after you told Gordon to play nice?

- And now Oswald has moved on to the list of people who uses Jonathan for his own ends, in this case using his name as a ploy to prove the GCPD is toothless.

- Selina and Tabitha show up at Barbara’s place. “No way.” Indeed.

- Barbara’s not quite as she was, but I wasn’t expecting her to be.

- Barbara still manages to be a better person than Tabitha.

- Alfred’s right; Bruce isn’t ready.

- Arkham being played as a horror movie when it’s a bunch of mentally ill people who’ve been fear-gassed is kinda gross.

- They’re not shying away from the fact that Gordon did kill Jonathan’s dad, though. I appreciate that. (I am kinda surprised he even recognizes Gordon, given the state he was in when Gordon got to him.)

- Oswald’s still being awful to Ivy.

- Barbara’s wonderful in how creepily unflappable she is. Oswald’s right in pointing out how unlikely it is she could have financed all this herself. (I’m thinking Ra’s al Ghul, and I’m thinking Barbara had a date with the Lazarus Pit at some point.)

- Back in Arkham. Jonathan confronts Gordon. He does look suitably horrified when he realizes it’s Jonathan, and seriously, how much of this shit Jonathan’s saying about his father does he even believe when he’s not in an altered state of consciousness?

- Gordon gets gassed, and honestly, I do not care about whatever it is he’s gonna see under the influence of the gas.

- “What will you see? One of your victims, perhaps?” Yeah, Jonathan’s definitely still in there. You’re not fooling anyone, kid.

- He sees Lee having slit her wrists. “You destroy everything you touch.”

- Jonathan tries goading Gordon into suicide, using language that makes me wonder if he isn’t suicidal himself. Though when Gordon shakes off the gas’s effects with ~~~willpower~~~, Jonathan isn’t there, so I dunno.

- It’s both more and less than I was hoping for, but Gordon does appear to feel genuinely sorry for Jonathan. He sounds like he actually means it when he tells Jonathan he needs help.

- “My father thought I was weak. All my life I was scared little Jonny. But I will never go back to being that scared boy again.” Ughhh nothing this show does will ever make me not feel sorry for him. Not with such a horrific backstory and the knowledge that he was being abused the whole time between Season 1 and now.

- (I am deeply irritated that Gordon just shook off the toxins’ effects with ~~~willpower~~~)

- And Ivy has had enough of Oswald, it seems.

- Water neutralizes fear gas?????? Are you fucking kidding me????!!!!!

- I love Alfred’s face when Lucius comes by with the armor. It’s a combination of “Oh, thank God” and “Fuck you, Lucius; don’t encourage him.”

- Selina is definitely not digging Tabitha wanting to cut off one of Barbara’s hands. But she can’t do it. Mercifully. Selina still doesn’t dig it.

(There is definitely something up with Barbara, though. I can’t imagine her being that calm about possibly getting one of her hands chopped off under normal circumstances.)

- And Oswald just straight up says in front of the press that he’ll pay the police to work for him instead. In what world does this work properly, without you getting arrested by the feds for admitting on camera you’ll bribe people?

- Ivy’s looking for stronger substances than just her perfumes. Honey, that’s so not gonna work out well for you. Ivy, please stop drinking it. Ivy, please stop.

…Oh, that’s not good.

- Falcone, fair? Falcone had honor? Are you fucking kidding me?! How thick do your nostalgia goggles have to be for you to say something like that, Harvey?!

- Baby Batman away! (The costume looks better with a cape, but Bruce probably doesn’t need to deal with that until he’s got the other stuff down pat.)

[comic-movieheroesranked]

Cinematic Comic Characters Ranked! (Year 2001)

Today's ranking is covering comic book characters introduced in Cinematic film in 2001. Our three contenders are Josie and the Pussycats, Lara Croft: Tomb Raider, and Ghost World. I had no idea each one had a comic series. I never heard of Ghost World, but I knew that the Pussycats had a TV show and that Tomb Raider is one of the most iconic games in history. Although each movie had some boring moments, I really enjoyed watching them. So let's get to the spoilers and rank these characters!

Cameo Appreciation: Melorra, Bus Man, Weird Al Waiter (Ghost World)

Since I've never seen Ghost World before I did some research and was happy to see that the movie included favorite minor characters for some quick cameos. We got the waiter who looks like Weird Al, the old man who waits for a bus that's out of service (or is it?), and a girl from high school that's so bubbly it drives Enid and Rebecca crazy.

Cameo Appreciation: Eugene Levy (Josie and the Pussycats)

Not a comic cameo but a celebrity cameo! Actor Eugene Levy showed up in a educational video that explains how and why kids are being brainwashed by the top artist's music. Even though it's random, it's fun and totally matches the lightness of the movie.

19. Ms. Roberta Allsworth (Ghost World)

“Oh. I thought maybe it was supposed to be your father.”

Starting off on our list is someone I didn't think was going to be significant in the film but just kept showing up as it went on. Ms. Roberta Allswroth is teachers the Remedial Art class Enid has to take after initially failing in high school. I went to a performing arts college and my playwright teacher was exactly like her. I never read a single play that was assigned and would completely bullshit my way through our discussions and she bought every second of it. Goes to show that some people really just want you to believe in what you're saying or, in Roberta's case, creating. She even manages to get Enid a scholarship but Enid screws that up when she doesn't show up to defend her controversial art piece at the gallery.

18. Fiona (Josie and the Pussycats)

"You can kiss my cellulite-free ass for all I've done for you!"

OK on the real, I have no idea why Fiona was in the movie. In fact, I'm still scratching my head at the whole "control the minds of the youth because I wasn't popular and had a lisp!" thing. I didn't even think that whole dialogue exchange where she would mumbled under her breath was necessary. Like I get why they put it there, but honestly they should have just cut her out and make the movie about Wyatt just trying to screw them over or something.

17. Manfred Powell (Lara Croft: Tomb Raider)

"Lady Croft, tell me, is there a good reason why I just kept you alive?"

I've always said that in a good movie, if the hero is worried about the villain the audience will too. And if the hero isn't worried...well there's probably a reason for that. The whole movie Manfred Powell is trying his very best to show that he is this intimidating person who knows what he's doing and during the whole movie Lara just proves that he isn't. At the end he manages to surprise Lara by killing Alex, but she quickly fixes it and he ends up dying from his own knife throw.

16. Seymour (Ghost World)

"I can't relate to 99% of humanity."

Seymour, Seymour, Seymour. He's probably the only real outcast in the entire movie. He looks and does things in a different way which quickly leads him to this lonely lifestyle when Enid finds him. Of course he falls for the girl after she shows interest in him and sleeps with him because what else is he expected to do? Like the rest of our characters, we don't know what's going to happen to him when the film ends, but you won't hear any complaints from me.

15. Dejour Boys (Josie and the Pussycats)

"Dejour means friendship!"

The boy band that's on everyone's lips at the start of the movie. These four white dudes are at the top of their game when Wyatt and Fiona decide to pull the plug. It probably has nothing to do with the fact that the dudes are spoiled as hell, especially the monkey. It's assumed they met their demise in a plane accident but they appear at the end of the film, revealing they survived but not after getting jumped by a Metallica crowd. You think they're there to save the day, but they don't. They don't really do anything since they're all in casts.

14. Josh (Ghost World)

"That's a vanilla milkshake."

He's the boy that's too nice to stick up to his asshole boss and too nice to say no to Enid and Rebecca's ridiculous plans. Seems that Enid and Rebecca both had a thing for him at some point which is why they keep bringing him around and involving him in their adventures. Josh, being the nice guy that he is, just puts up with it, which earns my respect.

13. Alex West (Lara Croft: Tomb Raider)

"Now for a cold shower."

Alex seems to be having an on-again off-again thing going on with Lara, who seems to be the in charge of their relationship's guidelines. Makes sense, they're both always traveling the world separately, why make it complicated? He's always there when Lara really needs to release some stress and she returns the favor by bringing him back to life when he gets knifed followed by getting crushed by some giant planet machine. It's a win/win situation for both of them.

12. Enid (Ghost World)

"I just hate all these extroverted, obnoxious, pseudo-bohemian losers."

You know how in high school there's that one person in your group of friends that you know you wouldn't be friends with if it weren't for both of you having mutual friends? Well my person was exactly like Enid and I couldn't stand her. I made it my life goal in high school to constantly call her out on her pretentious bullshit which is exactly what someone needed to do with Enid. Like my person, Enid is trying very hard to be something she's not. She's the type to act like being popular was overrated but if the popular kids wanted her to hang out with them, she'd do it in a second. It was annoying to watch her and I'm a little bummed the movie focused on her more than Rebecca.

11. Alan M. (Josie and the Pussycats)

“Josie McCoy, I love you!!!”

I really liked that when Alan M's car was acting up he went to Josie instead of acting all macho and trying to fix it himself. After I knew I was going to like him. He's a good boyfriend that supports the band and their success even when he's still trying to make something of his folk music career. At the end of the film he ends up crowd surfing to proclaim his love to Josie and then runs off to the side of the stage to continue supporting her as she performs her concert.

10. Bryce (Lara Croft: Tomb Raider)

"Well, I'm a free spirit, me."

The gadget man responsible for all the cool tech Lara sports throughout the movie. He's always cracking a joke and he's always reluctant to join in on whatever crazy adventure Lara is doing next. I also don't understand why he doesn't live in the mansion with 81 rooms that's only hosting Lara and her butler but to each their own.

9. Alexandra Cabot (Josie and the Pussycats)

"I'm here because I was in the comic book."

I never expected a character from Josie and the Pussycats to break the fourth wall. Alexandra did it so well that I mentally gave her a standing ovation (because I didn't feel like standing up from my couch). Because of her answer it doesn't bother me that she's always around despite no one wanting her around. I also appreciate the digs people constantly take on her, mainly as a response to the digs she tries to throw at them.

8. Alexander Cabot III (Josie and the Pussycats)

"I want a vintage tee...and Heath Ledger."

Either I wasn't paying attention or the movie never says who's actually older, Alexander or Alexandra. Are they even twins? Besides that Alexander is the manager of the girls even though he never does anything to actually manage them. He mainly just hangs around and spoils himself on his 15% commission until the end of the film when he realizes that all the superficial things in life do not matter.

7. Hillary (Lara Croft: Tomb Raider)

"I'm only trying to turn you into a lady."

If Lara Croft was Batman, Hillary would be Alfred Pennyworth. The similarities are ridiculous. Hillary takes care of Lara as her butler and doesn't hesitate to grab a shotgun and do damage when a threat arrives. He doesn't seem to mind Lara Croft's lifestyle, only wishes she'd do it in a very lady-like gown. I would've liked to see a little more tenderness between the two but Hillary serving Lara her pistols on a food tray will do just fine for the time being.

6. Wyatt Frame (Josie and the Pussycats)

"Eye Contact. Hand."

Despite being the secondary villain in the movie I thought Wyatt was way more interesting to watch than Fiona. He's a no nonsense kind of guy and knows how to get things done. I can't blame him for working for the dark side when he had to take care of the Dejour boys but I also can't say I felt sorry for him when his evil plans went to shit. Him punishing the Dejour boys was probably one of the funnier moments of the movie but I still wish they just rewrote the script to make him the main villain with a different (maybe even simpler?) evil plot.

5. Valerie Brown (Josie and the Pussycats)

"Wyatt, you messed with the wrong pussy."

In the TV series, Valerie made history as the first African American female to be a regular character in a TV show. In the movie she's the "mom friend" of the trio. She's always there when Josie's feeling down and she's quick to save Melody from whatever danger her naive self is about to get into. She also plays a mean bass guitar. We also see her insecurities when she seems to be an afterthought that comes with the other two pretty white girls. When the girls resolve all their issues, she serves a can of ass-whooping to Wyatt before performing the concert of their dreams.

4. Rebecca (Ghost World)

"Some people are OK, but mostly I just want to poison everyone."

Rebecca was easily my favorite character in Ghost World. While Enid doesn't try to fit in with the popular crowd because she thinks that somehow makes her cool, Rebecca doesn't because she genuinely doesn't feel the need to. While Enid doesn't go to college because she thinks it's uncool, Rebecca doesn't go to college because it really just isn't for her so she gets a job and starts earning a living. She starts calling out Enid more and more (like when she dyed her hair green) and eventually just gives up and starts becoming her own person. I really wanted the movie to focus more on her instead on Enid struggling to keep pretending to be something she's clearly not.

3. Josie McCoy (Josie and the Pussycats)

"It's cool if you like it, it's okay if you don't, just decide for yourselves."

The leader of the band, Josie is the only one who's name is promoted in the group's title. She sings, writes, plays guitar, and knows her way under the hood of a car. She has her insecurities, like every normal teenager does, but she's always there for her girls no matter what. She learns to share the spotlight and encourages their finds to like them for them, not because they're part of the next new fad.

2. Melody Valentine (Josie and the Pussycats)

"The tough makes lemonade!"

This precious cinnamon roll is too good for this world. She's literally always in a good mood, except for when she's being attacked but even then she throws in a few smiles here and there. Melody is the glue that holds the band together, always looking at the bright side of any situation. Despite Valerie being my favorite of the trio, I can acknowledge that the movie was as good as it was because of Melody. In the end she shows us just what a little ass kicker she is before rocking out on the drums for their dream concert.

1. Lara Croft (Lara Croft: Tomb Raider)

"I woke up this morning and I just hated everything."

Is anyone surprised? Lara Croft is one of the most iconic women in pop culture. When I was young, so many people were pumped for the movie. Despite the film being a bit of a bore, one thing most people agreed on was that Lara Croft was everything! The first scene with her against the robot literally felt like I was sucked into the game itself with her flipping around and sporting her signature dual pistols. She's unimpressed by the film's villain the entire time and easily outdo's him in literally every scene they share together. This badass proved early on how awesome a woman can be...and only in a tank top and shorts!

2000's list was dominated by the cast of X-Men and this list was dominated by awesome female characters from three different universes. The next list will cover all comic book characters that showed up in cinematic film during the year 2002. Can't wait to get started!

[redrobin-detective]

Don't know if this had been asked before but how would resolve/explored/develop the batfamily dynamics pre 52? I don't know if it was you or someone else, but it was brought up that the idea of Damian being more Dick's kid than Bruce's would be a neat idea to explore. Bruce would still bond w/Damian but he'd have to deal w/Damian seeing Dick as his real dad and Dick staying Batman for Damian's sake. Tim and Dick repairing their bond while the former and Damian would learn to accept each other.

Sorry, I know, I’ve held onto this for nearly a week but this is such a big ask I’ve been thinking about how to best describe and format it so I’ve been doing it bit by bit. Because I’ve given quite a bit of thought to how to integrate the ideas of pre-Flashpoint smoothly into N52, using the plot lines and developments from the later without sacrificing the former. I think it could have easily have been done and been more interesting because DC dropped off on some intense plotlines. *Also to save my fingers, Pre = Pre-Flashpoint/N52

Dick/Dami- I have done a few posts about how close they were pre and how Dami and Bruce really weren’t. Bruce was not the best father before he came back from the dead and had no interest in working with Damian in order to help the boy heal. In my fantasy, this would have played out. Damian would have refused to leave Dick’s side as his partner while now Bruce is hurt/confused on why his son now doesn’t want to be with him. I want Damian and Bruce to have a relationship but I want B to have to work for it. Nightwing and Robin shows Dick and Dami together with Batman and Red Robin has Tim and Bruce teamed but slightly at odds with each other, the once close relationship showing strain while Dick and Dami are going strong. Eventually Bruce earns Damian’s love and trust and begins patrolling with Bruce but he still remains immensely close to Dick and, no one says it aloud, but everyone considers him more Dick’s child than Bruce’s. By the time of Damian’s death, it should be Dick who is outraged and inconsolable with grief barely able to function while Bruce goes into his angry/panicked mode because he’d barely gotten any time with Dami and now he’s gone.

Tim- Just Tim in general would need a lot of work done and I’m not just saying that cause he’s my favorite. Red Robin left us with some pretty massive loose ends not to mention Timmy had be been bent and twisted by his experiences to the point that he was different and not always in good healthy ways. In Batman and Red Robin, we see the strain slowly start to show. B is still mad for Tim almost killing Boomerang at the same time he’s upset at how much Tim has grown-up and grown away. He’s also lowkey upset about Dami and, I don’t want to say he’s using Tim to fill in until Damian comes back but it’s implied. He also becomes increasingly concerned for Tim’s mental/physical health. Tim meanwhile is a slow, steady downward slope of depression and feelings of isolation and hurt/anger/insecurity over how the batfam treated him the past few years. First half would show the two fighting and generally slipping down, maybe Tim has a bad health scare with spleen and finally enough is enough and they focus on pulling Tim back. Also like to see a resolution to the Ra’s arc in which Ra’s comes in and tries to sway Tim over to his side which becomes more possible as Tim slips further away from the batfam. The whole fam/Titans get together and help get Red in a better place. (also wishful thinking, as all this occurs, Tim begins to realize his love for Conner and is dealing with that on top of everything. It spills out one night and is delighted/terrified to find his best friend has felt the same way for a long time. they agree to put any relationship on hold until Tim is in a better place but they sneak a few kisses and the support really helps Tim get back together)

Tim/Jason- Just as an aside I’d really like to see this (brotherly/friend) relationship develop. I like that N52 had these two be friends but it drove me nuts that after 6 years of Jay wanting nothing more than Tim’s death they’re besties? I’d like to think Jay would be one of the first to see how bad things have gotten for Tim because he’s been there, he know what it’s like to be the forgotten Robin. And Jay is still angry but his head is finally starting to clear from the Pit and he acknowledges that what happened with him and B wasn’t Tim’s fault. And as he watches Tim slowly spiral downwards with seemingly no help, Jay decides he won’t see another Robin die. Jason approaches Alfred, then B about Tim’s health and ways to help. It’s tense and awkward as they test the waters but they agree to, separately, help get Tim straight. It’s slow going but between Outlaw missions, Jay stops by Tim’s apartment and hangs out with him. They patrol when B is with Dami, they talk and properly get to know each other. They find they have a bit in common and actually like talking. Tim finally talks about some of the messed up things that happened and lets Jay know how bad things got and Jay finally talks about his traumas and comes to terms with them. As Tim is still angry at Dick/Bruce, Jason becomes a confidant in the batfam.

Jason- Actually RHATO Rebirth Jason is a pretty good idea of what I’m thinking of. We have a Jason who, after a few years finally is able to move past the Pit’s influence and think clearly for the first time in a while. It makes him realize that most of his actions were done out of anger so he re-evaluates. B sees this and takes the opportunity to reach out which Jason appreciates and returns by telling B about Tim. That’s where B and J start making things right, when they’re talking about how to best help Tim, they’re also covertly talking about how to deal with what happened. It gets out that Hood is a Bat and Jay is forced to ally himself properly with his family in order to avoid being torn apart by the criminal community. Jay will never be the golden son, he agrees that he won’t purposely kill but he toes the line far more than Bruce is comfortable with. The trust between them is razor thin but they’re trying. B hates it but he uses Jason as an agent who does the things B cannot/will not do. Jay spends only about half the time in Gotham, the other half with the Outlaws (NOT Kory/Roy, Jay needs his own team not hand-me-downs, Artemis/Bizarro?). He gets on better terms with Tim, but is still at odds with Dick even more so on Tim’s behalf for replacing the kid when he was down. Eventually learns to like Dami and becomes a proper big brother with him. I’d like a side arc seeing Jason going back to school? Going to GCU maybe with Steph under a false ID, that’d be nice.

Cass and the BOP- Having read Cass’s Batgirl run I think it’d be a natural progression that she’d fit in with the Birds. Cass loves her new family but she also needs space for herself to grow and she remembers Bruce was rather suffocating with her. She moves in fulltime with Barbara on the excuse she’s there to help/respond quickly but honestly she’s working on bettering her people skills and needs that constant human interaction. Babs teaches her to read when not on missions and the other Birds are very supportive of Cass. Cass also trains the other Birds in techniques and really hones the Team’s skills. They become just as formidable and respected as the Bats. They learn to coordinate better so they each can have more times off. The Birds would have their own section of Gotham as “theirs”, their own rogues gallery, get involved in the ladies’ personal lives. Barb is still struggling with her on again/off again relationship with Dick, now complicated by children in all but name, Damian and Cass (lol Bruce lost two children to other people). Cass is working on being a person and not a weapon but trying to keep up her impressive skills. Steph is a reserve member, available if needed but she’s really trying to ally herself with the Bats. She and Cass though retain a strong relationship, Steph because her relationship with Tim has soured and she needs someone and Cass because Steph was her first friend.

Stephanie- I’d basically like a continuation of her Batgirl run which was marvelous and go read it. Stephanie is still trying to prove herself to that Bats that she’s worthy of the cape and cowl and, for the most part, she’s earned it. Bruce now grants her the Batgirl title and keeps her on the roster and her belt equipped. But there’s always gonna be some tension between them and he’s undeniably harsher on her than the others. She patrols often with Dick and Damian who like/trust her more and, a lot of times, if Dick is working or whatever it will just be her and Damian. She relishes the big sister role and the feminine influence is good on Damian (though he’ll never admit to it). Continues her classes at GCU, nearly falls over when Jason sits next to her in her English Lit class. The big problem for her is keeping up with the other more confident/well-trained heroes and also repairing her relationship with Tim. She messed up, he took it badly, she moved up in batfam, he started spiraling out of control. He’s still angry about what went down but recently has been trying to repair the relationship. But too much has happened and they’ve both changed so much. Neither likes admitting how different from Robin and Spoiler they are. Her and Jay discuss how to handle Tim while studying poetry. As Tim’s health improves, he lets Steph in more and they start their friendship over. Also very close to the BOP/Cass and while she’ll hang out with them a lot out of costume, she’s determined to be a Bat. Maybe after she gains some confidence, she might switch over to the BOP for good.