#but hes a lil boring fella so its fine

[g3othermal3scapism]

sydcarmy if they were fucking cool

[angelstar-light]

✨✨ALRIGHTY IT IS TIME FOR TMC OC LORE!✨✨

🪦🥀CASSIEL🥀🪦

first off, “Who or What exactly is Cassiel, and what kind of Alternate is he?”

CASSIEL is a doppelgänger type alternate, you can see how he takes appearance as a cemetery angel but at the same time, a similar appearance to his creator and father; Gabriel. He usually blends in with the other statues in the cemetery. But what does he do exactly? Well we all know the real Archangel Cassiel, responsible for comforting to those in grief or in great sorrow. Well, this one does the exact opposite! He feeds off from people’s grief and will encourage the victim into more dread— leading themselves to M.A.D.

And i shit you not this guy doesn’t really do anything as much, thats because his residence is only and i mean ONLY in the cemetery because well apparently he blends better there, and when ofc they see an alternate roaming the streets they will immediately go apeshit.

He has yet nothing to do except just roam around the cemetery doing completely random things. Like blowing off candles from a grave, decaying lil flower bouquets, or just stay there intact like a natural statue. So yeah its..quite oddly boring for him. Although he's definitely fine in the night, he loves to just lay and watch the stars. It fascinates him that they burn eternally until they die out, nonetheless they're still beautiful. And his personality? He's more of a timid little fella but he's got a lil bit of burning sass laying inside somewhere. I mentioned that he’s kiiiind of made outta stone right? If he were to crack or loose a limb it’ll regenerate and reconstruct back to normal, you dont wanna see what horrid shit lays beneath those stone cracks. Sometimes it takes a while for him to reconstruct a limb lol.

Next off in the list! “What’s his current status as of now?”

Like i said he just doesn’t do much, but more or less he’s DEFINITELY against Alt!Gabriel. He hates that fucker with burning passion, despite being a creation of his, he despises him to the fullest. He's tried to step back from the killing bit BUT he's got nothing really else to do but lurk in cemeteries waiting to haunt someone like a ghost, He's never been anywhere, or everywhere. He's a cemetery angel so he would prefer blending in than standing out so its kind of his personal abode; the cemetery. If he were to explore out of the cemetery he'd either pussy out immediately because "yeah this is just a waste of my time-" or be a lil dubious curios creature. He sometimes relies on the humans to do something about the whole alternate infestation but tbh he naturally doesnt.

He cant kind of really do anything about it, cuz obviously genuinely CANT cuz Gabe's henchmen alternate children will go after him and kill him themselves. He may know death very well, but good god he doesn't wanna experience death too soon he's got a lot to discover yknow? But if its the end for him, he'll willingly accept his fate he's got nothing else to live for anyway FOR NOW— He still does rely a little on the humans to resolve it but he knows how atrociously dumb some humans can be /j /hj Oh AND he's irrationally a lil afraid of the other alternates because he knows it would be the death of him if he would do something maybe stupid or go after Alt!Gabe and they'd kill him on sight Imao so he just does about anything to avoid that from happening.

and so it continues! “Does he have any relationship status?”

Nope he doesn’t fascinate himself in having a partner, so i guess he might be aromatic asexual 👀. Although he’a got a couple human friends! Surprisingly. It all started when Mika (another TMC OC of mine!) was visiting a dead friend's grave in the cemetery, so in connection with Cassiel, the grave where her dead friend is happens to be the graveyard where Cassiel is. so Cassiel got real curious about her cuz "wow why does she visit that grave so much?? lemme try and mess with her lol."

and so he did. but Mika realized what the hell was happening way too soon and there they met. He was left baffled and confused on why it didnt work, yes Mika was in grief for a couple moments— but hey that story wont be told on this one just yet 👀. But for context she's in a small organization in which her role is being a little expert on Alternates so she KNOWS stuff. But ye they went on a little truce that IF he doesnt kill her, she'll at least show him around outside of the cemetery like a lil guy seeing the world for the first time! So TIME SKIP TO THE PRESENT! a little while after, he’s now a part in the said organization and he now lives with Mika as a roommate and a friend, buddies!

We’re coming in close, it is time for the basic questions!

His Sexuality? He’s an aromantic asexual

His Pronouns? He/him/they/them/it/its

Is he huggable? I’d..say so? But he’s made outta stone so its a little rough- dont worry! He’s a gentle fella :>

Is he aware of what his friends think of him as? Yep, actually a few dont really trust him fully but he’s pretty close with Mika whos close enough to actually trust him.

Favorite food? He’ll gladly eat anything, but it would be chocolate crinkles :]

Does he age? Or how old is he? His age is actually unidentified, and he cant age at all.

Can i date him? “𝐈’𝐥𝐥 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐨…𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐥𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐬𝐬.” - CASSIEL 🪦🥀

Whats his hobbies? Well besides the usual and now that he’s out of the cemetery, he just loves to go cloud watching and stargazing most of the time when he’s at Mika’s house.

[LIKES]🤍

- clouds and stars

- definitely wearing comfy clothes

- crinkle cookies!

- cats and moths

- is now practicing how to paint and sculpturing

- Decayed roses or just white roses, its common seeing in a graveyard

- greek sculpture/architecture aesthetic

[DISLIKES] 🖤

- he dislikes humans sometimes lol

- Alt!Gabriel, mf despises him

- being handled or interacted wrongly

- the fact he’s an alternate, sadge :(

- Kids.

- being picked up, cuz he’s made outta damn roCKS

- fiddling with his stone cracks

- crowded loud places

You made it to the end! Whew boy— thanks for reading btw heheee :D

[archived-gtronpa-account]

Ok ok hear me out, Shuichi having 2 calm down a borrower after they’ve been caught by Kokichi

I'm,,, wheezing,,,

Alrite if the borrower is so scared I'm assuming this is going with a villainous Kokichi? That's not my fave trope but I can go with that

Mmmm maybe maybe gimme a sec,,, ohhh okay I got it here's what I'm thinking:

Shuichi knows something weird is going on in his apartment. There's odd supplies and bits of food missing, since he lives alone then there must be something or someone stealing all rhat. Obviously it can't be rats or some run cause they wouldn't steal pins and bottle caps, it has to be a someone. But why steal those things and such small quantities of food? Is someone toying with him? He checked with his neighbours and no one reports hearing or seeing anyone intrude in his apartment. So it's safe to say Shuichi is really creeped out but also very, very intrigued

Eventually he makes his lil investigation and the best conclusion he comes to is that it's one of those tiny thiefs he's read legends about in shady websites. It sounds really stupid but it's the only fitting conclusion, besides, does it matter if it's so carzy? Not really. His life is already so stressful he needs some wonder and fantasy, so he just goes with it and starts jokingly believing in the little people in his walls, sometimes outloud saying stuff like 'Hey right now I'm not in the kitchen so if you want to get some food now the coast is clear' or 'goodnight little people or person have a safe stealing trip' and 'by the way little people if you need anything just tell me okay? I'm leaving the cupboards open I bought some groceries today hope that'll be good enough'. He doesn't believe that one second, but he finds it really fun and a nice way to escape from stress, thinking there's someone listening to him.

Though, he does tell Kokichi about the weird occurrences in his apartment and jokingly mentions it could be tiny thiefs. Kokichi takes that much more seriously and takes it as a challenge and a game to understand what's going on at Saihara's place.

When Shuichi is gone, Kokichi lockpicks his door and gets in (Saihara already knows about his lockpicking, and Kichi even snuck in to surprise him a couple times, so it's alright) and coincidentally (more like by the power of scriptwriting ease) the borrower is out borrowing at that time.

Pif paf poof! Kokichi jumps at the little fella before he can get away, plucks him up in a fist and sticks him in his pocket and leaves like the thief he is. No more problems for his friend Saihara.

Now, I think Kokichi is the type who always wants entertainment. Either he'll be the one entertaining large groups and people he's keen of with his antics, or pushing the buttons of those he finds boring. Going further with this to make him the villain here, he'd be curious about the weird lil guy he found but also think they'll be too weak and boring if he doesn't mess with them.

He'd defo enjoy manhandling the hell out of the lil borrower at first, playing games with it and making it do tedious parkours n stuff or hang them where they can't move a muscle, like those little rain doll things Japanese people hang to their umbrellas and elsewhere for good weather? Yea like that. Nothing to actually physically harm the lil guy, but he'll push them to their very limit and keep them weak and exhausted.

Oftentimes he'll 'forget' to lock them up at night and make them think they can escape, only to catch them at the very least second, 'It's a lie!' and yoink them up and lock them again or sleep with them trapped in a loose fist. It happens many times and each time the borrower knows it's a trap but tries anyway, and each time they get caught they despair more and more.

The times Kokichi actually tries to act like a pure villain is when he's interrogating the borrower. Who are you, what are you, why were you at Saihara's place, why do you hide and steal... Etc etc. He does that dark face thing and brings a finger down on the borrower's torso gently pressing on it taunting them. It's pathetic seeing them pinned down and struggling to fight even one finger.

Needless to say, Kokichi's fun is hell for the poor borrower. Plus, being already super afraid of humans, their experience with Kokichi is borderline traumatic.

Meanwhile, Shu notices the little stealings stopped. He's kinda sad about it and still talks to his walls like 'hey little people are you still here? Hope I didn't anger you or something please come back' but ultimately doesn't dwell on it and keeps his focus on more important matters.

One day he needs to get back something he lent to Kokichi, who's lot home. He needs it really urgently so he just uses the spare keys kichi gave him (yea I'm just assuming they're that good of friends) and quickly goes in his room to get it, but as he's leaving he hears a weird little sound, something like a whimper. For a second he thinks Kokichi is hiding under his bed or something but the sound seems like it came from his desk. He gets closer and inspects it and sees a flash of movement from a drawer that's cracked open. His curiosity is piqued and he takes a look in...

And finds a terrified little guy.

Shu's mind short-circuits for a second, unable to process the scene before his eyes. It gets worse when the weird tiny person speaks 'Why you- why are you here? Did K-Kokichi let you see me?'

Shu is super taken aback and stutters a quick no, and sees the little person scoot back, fear clear in its eyes. He realizes he looks like an intruder or a thief.

'Ah- I don't want to hurt you! I'm kind of lost here though, who are you? Why are you like this... And in Kokichi's drawer?'

For a moment, the tiny person doesn't speak or look at him in the eyes, deep in thoughts and reluctant with fear, but then they speak.

'Shuichi, y-you have to help me... Kokichi kidnapped me- I don't want to be here! Please help me!' and despite seeming terrified of Shu, they seem desperate.

Shu is now 10x times more lost. The situation is as confusing as a dream, but what matters at the moment is to help and reassure the scared little person. He's really not sure what to do, but first it'd be good to get them out of that dark and cramped drawer and go back to his place and try to figure things out.

He doesn't really know if he can grab the lil fella, so he takes his cap off and lets them climb in then holds it up to his chest to hide the tiny guy while he walks in the streets. He's not the best at comforting but he does mumble a few apologies and reassuring words to let the tiny person know that everything is fine. It's a little unnerving for the borrower to hear Shu talk to them again like he used to- except this time, Shu knows they exist. Either way, it helps bring some comfort.

Shu bumps into Kokichi on his way out and freaks out, but tries to keep his cool.

'Saihara~ did you need something at my place? You should have called me you know? It's very rude to go inside people's houses while they're away, also super illegal. Gasp! Did Saihara finally succumb to the temptation of crime?' his tone is teasing and playful, but there's something of an edge to it, and his big, bright smile seems too forced to be genuine.

'ah, yeah but it's alright I got it now-'

'what are you hiding in your cap?'

Meanwhile the borrower can hear shu's heart pound too fast, or maybe that's their own heartbeat. They don't want to be caught by Kokichi again.

'Nothing- really, I just took it off since it's a little hot outside'

'you say that while wearing a hoodie? Saihara would never ever take his cap off! What are you hiding?' his face goes blank and serious. Before he can be stopped, he reaches for the cap and tilts it to see the tiny, shaking fella inside.

Now, Shuichi isn't the confrontational type, but the tiny person just looks so terrified and pitiful, all shaking and wide eyed. He smacks the hand reaching for tiny person harshly and brings the cap and the tiny fella closer to his chest, then sneaks another hand in to brush against their toothpick-like arm in reassurence. He frowns and tries to question Kokichi, but the shorter guy takes the lead and speaks first.

'oh, I see you found my little friend!'

'i would hardly call them your "friend" seeing how scared of you they look'

'aww, so mean! They're scared of everyone, not just me! Besides, you should be grateful, Saihara, I got rid of your apartments's problem and fixed them! Now you can be sure they'll never try to mess with you again. Ah, but if you want your problem back, I don't care. They were too boring anyway' his tone is venomous, and there's a finality to it. Just like that Kokichi walks away, whistling a tune like he'd just been talking about the weather, that seems so over the top for him that Shu gets the feeling he's pissed but is hiding it. Shuichi really wants to grab his shoulder and stop him to confront him, but the shaky person clinging to his hand is more important at the moment.

He goes back to his apartment in a rush and carefully sets the tiny person in his bed since it's the most comfortable surface and the poor little guy seems exhausted. He's not really sure what he should do so he leaves to the kitchen to make some tea and clear his mind.

He goes back to his room and can't find the small person! He freaks out and starts looking for them- but then a thought pops in his mind, he remembers how he'd thought there could be little people living in his walls, and it just clicks that if the person knew his name and somewhat trusted him then maybe, as crazy as that sounds, they could be the little thief in his walls?

After a moment of thought, it doesn't sound that crazy after all. Shuichi sighs and sets the cup and thimble of tea on his desk, then looks around the room and thinks of what to do in that situation.

'Um,' he feels self conscious, talking to the walls again but knowing this time that there's someone listening, 'i know you're really scared right now, I would be too if I were you. I'd probably be even more scared than you- I know I would never have trusted some giant stranger to hold me and help me get out of a bad situation, that was really brave. So, uh... Thank you for trusting me back there, I'm glad I could help. I don't really have the right to ask that but... please, don't be afraid of me. If you don't need my help anymore then I'm really happy, but it would kill me to know if you're hiding while you need help. I know I must look really scary to you, really really scary, but I promise I only want to help. So, um, please don't hesitate to come if you need anything.' he exhales and feels his face flushing. The words sound cheesy on his tongue, but he is being as honest as he can be.

He doesn't expect it to work though, so when he sees a tiny head poking from behind the pile of books on his desk, he feels the tension in his limbs evaporate and a warm feeling blooming in his chest. Being so shy, people don't think he is reliable, so he's glad to see someone so scared of him still put some trust in him.

The borrower takes a few steps closer and nods 'alright'.

Then there's a bit of an awkward silence as neither knows what to do next. Shu remembers his old plans and carefully pushes the thimble closer to the little person.

'ahh, i made you some tea. It must have gotten cold now though, sorry. Do you want me to hear it up again?' and he leaves to do it, stops at his bedroom's door, thinking that if he leaves the little person again they might try to run off, but he pushes that thought away.

He's gals and relived when he gets back and finds them sitting in the middle of his desk, nervous but present nonetheless. He feels too intimidating and large and monstrous so he kneels on the floor to be more at eye level with the tiny person.

'we can talk if you want, or we can just be silent. Either way is fine with me' he doesn't want them to feel pressured, poor little thing already seems too scared and fidgety. He's afraid to loose whatever silver of trust they have in him.

The borrower is silent for a while, sipping at their tea and stealing a few glances up at their old bean. Living alone, their bean had been their only company. Not to mention that he was so nice when he talked to them in the walls, not even sure someone was listening. It had been unnerving, but also a nice change from the constant silence and loneliness. The borrower feels a bit more at ease and slowly opens up about what happend and who they are.

They're a little quiet, stammer a lot and speak so fast most of their speech doesn't make much sense and is hard to follow, but Shuichi patiently listens anyway, until their words slowly fade to small sobs and quiet sniffles.

Shuichi's heart tightens at the sight. He doesn't know how to comfort a crying person, but he has to be there for them, so he slides a finger on their back and rubs it in gentle motions. He doesn't do anything more and lets them decide whether or not they accept the gesture, thinking the touch may discomfort them. he just doesn't want to overwhelm the poor fella.

Shuichi is usually the one to rely on others, the role of a strong and supportive person is foreign to him so he's bit at a loss for words, but he does clumsily promise he'll protect them and make them happy.

(shoot! This got much longer than I planned but eh, at least I kinda like how it turned out it was worth spending a while on)

[dissidiawol]

hey guys me here with another incoherent post hope youre ready bcs im not gonna try and make this look good at all

born and raised in vault 69 or 420 i forgot which i dont think it was 666 though our guy jack lived a very vault in the groundy life where he became childhood friends with local favourite scott snyder (no relation to dc guy just a coincidence)when he turned 18 his parents gave him his classic famous world renowned mask which jack decided to never take off and eventually he grew up to become the new vault overseer where he made everything really good. so good in fact the vault became completely self sustained and he no longer had to do anything so he got bored and was like well im leaving bye :)

out into the mojavelicious wilds he went with some high quality loot scott gave to him that he found on his ventures to the outside world but eventually came to the kinda crazy realisation that reality was not what it seemed and could be manipulated in really boss ways. he learned how to cheat. and after finding soooo many people he didnt like and killing them he ended up in new vegas (he jumped the fence) and started asking the lovely ladies at gomorrah and that absolute legend swank what the haps is around the mojave

he went for a lil classic wander where he met a funny lil purple fella running around with a really strong black lizard and was like omgggg im about to rock this guys world. he told the amnesiac about the cheats and how to use them then watched in mild horror as he started using them to become invincible, run absurdly fast, jump stupidly high, and spawn in really specific shit like papa johns pizzas as well as a quite franky very stylish and fashionable patterned suit. after parting ways with the man who was definitely wrong about his name he stole a chainsaw off some legion scum and returned to freeside (not to kill them he just wanted to go back) where he made friends with some kings (the kings) and broke back into the strip to investigate the tops if not just for the funny name. and wow oh wow there he was the funniest boy in the whole wide state. weird yet smooth talking chairman benny gecko. despite the everything about him jack ended up catching feelings for the well known antagonist and found himself in his suite mighty often for the next few years

after a luxurious casino living, bffing swank, spawning in a really fucked up looking ride to cruise the desert lazilier, ripping oh so many people to shreds, everyone in the desert going blank and acting like he wasnt there and repeating things hed already seen them do, starting a food garden outside the tops, helping people in an honestly kinda fucked up way, and getting drunk then marrying benny and taking his name in classic vegas fashion, the perfect world that purple but not purple guy guy created began to get stale. the entire legion was dead the ncr was gone the kings had so much gold suddenly and unfortunately jack was unbearably bored. post apocalyptic life was simply a bit cringe.

after woefully informing the entirety of nevada jack decided to break up with benny (on really good terms dont worry) and leave in search of yet another new life

cruising around at the speed of whatever jack travelled all over america in seeing sights and realising that its literally just nevada that looks like that and everywhere else in the world is completely and utterly fine. at least he thought as much until he went to visit eastern europe and found out things are totally fucked there too. but hey at least he made a friend. his name was kinda similar to benny but not too close. a healthy inbetween. then one fateful day on the plane he didnt pay to be on to literally wherever (he didnt care) he saw some random kid reading a comic and was like well hold on there whos this saucy little minx on the cover. he interrogated the kid and FINALLY found where he wanted to move. blüdhaven.

with suitcases stuffed with weapons and comics he extremely easily got in and started to do some research on the city and its neighbour, gotham, and decided it was time to dust off the ol axe and roll some heads, both because he thought they were [expletive deleted] and because he wanted to get the attention of the guy from the stories. both fortunately and unfortunately it worked without him having to even kill anyone yet because you cant just go around jumping on rooftops without the king of the rooftops noticing. from that day on he had a very heated and Very homoerotic enemyship with the citys protector nightwing.

except they werent really enemies. sure they fought a lot and nightwing was strongly against murder and tried to stop jack a lot of times, but he was helping the civillians. he was killing people who (although hed never say this) deserved it and he was charitable. he was kind and caring even if he showed it in the wrong way. he wasnt such a bad guy he was actually pretty sweet... wait. on the flipside jack consistently threw their brawls and escaped so he wouldnt actually HURT nightwing. the absolute last thing he needed was for the guy he came here for to die. instead all jack really wanted to do was annoy him and get on his nerves. taunting and teasing him between punches yet never going too far and hitting a nerve.

nightwing was conflicted though because jack (or majora as he decided to call himself) always got away he just would not get arrested so he went to ask batman what to do and batman was like dont worry man i got this. hospital. immediately. wouldve been killed if jack didnt know that if that happened nightwing would never recover. nightwing was like ok thats it this time i will not fucking fail. well. funny story mate. the fight went pretty much same as usual cept this time emotions were running higher. the mask had been knocked off. it was raining. it was all very tense. so anyway the next morning nightwing left jacks house and things became different. do you get what im doing here its an enemies to lovers thing guys. do you see? do you understand? they kept fighting but the vibe was different. jacks teasing got more flirty and they. clears throat. ykno. more often. eventually they stopped bothering with the whole meeting on a rooftop and duking it out thing and just visited eachother apartments. there wasnt any confessions or any do u wanna be my bf uwu they just both knew it was obvious and considered eachother as such anyway. they were just dating now no more hate only love uwuwuwuwuwu. im pretty sure i dont need to keep going like you know the rest right. jack makes friends with a bunch of people and kills some people like blockbuster and the joker its all very basic stuff. you get it you know this.

anyway thanks fellas hope you didnt all fucking hate this 😍😍😍

[trxshmth]

richie tozier takes a kind beating

History class could be a bitch to deal with. Not that his teacher was a mean old hag, really. Mrs. Harrington was just fine for lil’ old Derry and its enormous amount of disfunctional teenagers. Richie was just bored out of his mind and figured a trip to the bathroom (and perhaps behind the bleachers to smoke a cig) would do the trick. Despite being graffited all over, it was rare for anyone from Bowers’ inner circle to hang out there at that time (yes, years running from them had given Richard a notion of their agenda).

One’s mind can truly wonder while pissing, you see. Rich mindlessly gazed over the sayings on the wall, most of them old enough for him to know them by heart. It wasn’t until he was zipping himself up that a new addition caught his eye.

Richie Tozier sucks Uris cock

It shouldn’t hit him that hard, honestly. Utterly disgusting things had been written about him on these walls over the years, most of them about his sexuality. Therefore it shouldn’t make his stomach churn. At the end of the day they were kinda right, weren’t they? Richie did feel things towards boys that he wasn’t supposed to. Trying to erase them would only fuel his bullys’ hatred and avoiding any conflict that wasn’t caused by his big mouth was mandatory if Rich wanted to graduate alive. 

This simple logic had motivated him for years. It made no sense then when Tozier grabbed a couple of paper towels, wet them and started agressively scrubbing at the tile. He scrubbed all over the saying, frustrated when it only faded a tiny bit. His efforts then were focused on one word only, so if it didn’t work well at least a bit was erased. Thank fuck Uris was a small word otherwise he’d be fucked. 

A door slamming open startled him. Heavy footsteps echoed through the small space and even before turning around Richie knew he was utterly fucked. So he scrubbed harder, furiously trying to erase Stan’s name before his aching fingers couldn’t anymore.

“What do we have here?”, Henry Bowers’ annoying voice called him. Victor Criss snorted behind his leader. “I can’t believe after all those years you haven’t learned how things fucking work around here, Bucky Beaver.”

“No one gets to erase anything from the bathroom, you fucking faggot”, Criss snarled. Richie merely glanced at them, still working. Stanley’s name was almost a faint mark now.

“There was a red spot over here, fellas, so I decided to spare you from the trouble since it probably came from Henry’s period.”, Richie spoke before thinking, something all to usual for him. He watched with some satisfaction as Bowers’ face got redder, his eyes widening in rage. Hockstetter made a face that could be mistaken as a horrible stomach ache hadn’t Richie known them for his whole life. The saying on the wall resumed to “Richie Tozier sucks    cock” now and that was something he could deal with.

Or not. Henry’s fist collided in a flash with his face and perhaps what hurt the most was his glasses punched on his face. Richie dropped the used paper towels, hands quickly checking if his lenses were cracked. They were fine, he breathed in relief. His mother would kill him if he broke his glasses once again. Tozier had no time to react, however, for Bowers’ fist was quick and aimed at his nose. Richie got dizzy as the metallic taste filled his mouth.

“Fucking stupid cocksucker, gonna teach you a fucking lesson”, Henry sounded a bit distant and looked blurry. Richie raised his hands but it was a second too late. Bower’s had a poor aim, maybe, because he hit Rich’s brow instead of his eye. Almost simultaneously Hockstetter and Criss decided to join their leader and a sharp pain on his right knee made his legs give out. 

It was a blur from then on. Funny how little details stood out, though. The taste of blood in his mouth felt bitter, way too sharp for his taste. His vision was blurry and he prayed it was because his glasses had been flung out somewhere in between the fight. Richie covered his head with his arms and waited for it to be over. Painful grunts escaped his lips and maybe it was the lack of a proper reaction that fueled them. Once upon a time, Richie fought back. He screamed and thrashed, throwing fists right back at those fuckers. The beatings got worse and, mind you, at that time the main reason was how his proeminent front teeth and sharp mouth annoyed Henry. 

One day he simply didn’t put up that much of a fight anymore. His quick tongue was his biggest weapon and it was awfully hard to think of smart comebacks when getting your ass kicked. Richie then discovered that if he didn’t say anything, they would eventually grow tired and leave. It had been his best course of action for some time now, specially when the beatings were because he did something considered gay.

“This town don’t want the likes of faggots like you”, Henry grunted above him before giving one final kick to his gut. Maybe the others said more things. Who the fuck cared anyway. The cold floor tile was a blessing against his sore face. Richie focused on that instead. 

The door slammed shut soon after and Richie chuckled humourlessly, followed by a pained moan. It had been a while since the Bowers’ Gang had beaten the shit outta him. Rich blinked, slowly trying to see if they had written over what he had just erased. His vision was only of blurs of faraway ink. His glasses must have been on the floor somewhere. The prospect of moving any muscle was dreadful still though. His whole being hurt and Tozier needed at least some minutes before standing up. So he stayed still, breathing hard and curled up against the cold tiles.

[sikereviewdotcom]

wilfred (2011) - season 1 ep1 “happiness” review

ok so today were reviewing fucking "wilfred" basically its a story about a depressed guy who tried to kill himself but he failed because hes a pushover in life and even suicide is mocking him yea jk actually his sis prescribed him placebo so the meds he used in his suicide attempt were useless yada yada

then he sees his neighbours (on who he tots have the hots for) dog as a man and hes like lol wtf why is there a furry standing in my yard? im not into dogplay dudette, please dont do this to me ah-

unfortunately for him the chick, on the next day asks to take care of her dog meanwhile because idk shit happens in her house? and she has to work? yea something like that so anyway he accepts because hes into her and out of it aswell more out of it than anything tho

our man, ryan is pretty disturbed but it happens anyway he has NO control over his life so why would he have control on  a dog fursuit wearing 40 yo man? yea exactly wouldnt make sense

wilfred enters his house and smoke a damn bong thats right, a very efficient way to introduce what kind of character were up against see, jason gann has the perfect face for such character looking all dirty in that suit with a big ass black painted dog nose you gotta think "that dawgs up to no good" and youd be damn right keep reading to discover why so basically nm happens in this episode if it isnt the setting of all the shit because well ryan has a lot of issues and its gonna get worse you cant believe this dog is gonna make things better for ryan not really hes just scamming the loser with cheap tricks and drugs

btw after (trying) to vape or w/e with wilfred, the man falls asleep, wakes up because his sis whos a bitch, remember her

its important to spot whos a bitch in each show ill be reviewing its pretty easy to balance whos the antagonist and who isnt although it often is much more complexe than that which is why im here making it all very easy and very interesting, aside from lost cases like the magic school bus i cant make that shit any worse nor TOO better like i have limited power my reviews are sike but some shows are just nah back to our whipped cream: ryans depression: he is jobless ok? so his sis is mad that he doesnt make the effort to come work and do what he has to also he used to be a lawyer btw because his father wanted him to be and then his father died and he lost his job and he hated being a lawyer so w/e but he also seemingly lost all reasons to live and redacted more than one suicide letter so im not sure what to think about it he was really eager to die yknow his sis couldnt care less tho its like "yo stop ruining my image im trynna get you a job in my hospital fuckface" yea see that why shes an inconsiderate bitch

so instead of going to work because of wilfred, ryan takes him for a while btw that vermin also tries to get elijah (the actor playing ryan is elijah wood obvs btw so this series already gets 5 points to begin with i dont make the rules) to throw a tennis ball and dont forget this ball ok? its gonna come back and start a whole drama its the beginning of our adventure a ball

next theyre in a restauration thing eating chips and drinking a beer together dog and his friend then the waitress comes and

happens the tiddies eating, it almost one fucking minute im sure we could all feel the embarassement of having your animal rubbing its balls and penis against your friend whos over for the nights leg in the middle of spring and youre just trying to get it back but wow the hormones are hitting it hard its like a cleaning robot vibrating on a grandma whos cardiacs chest and you trynna take that little asshole away but for some reason its rubbed in olive oil so not only does it reeks of olive, its also slippery as heck and you can see your grandma spasmming on her soon-to-be deathbed, she has spasms for god sake no the robot no someone stop it from stimulating the old ladys torso ah shit marguerite died after drowning in her drooling 

not even died of an heart attack nah, it was such a messy death she suffered so much no one could do anything its like the robot was sentient yknow and well same goes for wilfred hes making it on purpose but uses the excuse : he likes the boobs it nothing personal, ryan

w/e they leave after paying (not for the side tits tho, it was a freebie for dogs) after that shit happens (i wont spoil you EVERYTHING, im just painting a pic here ok?) at this point you could wonder "is wilfred being a dick on purpose or its just about said instincts? how much percentage of his behavior is actually dog and how much is ryans mind (the guy is deranged  there is no denying that but how much? )) whats sure is that his owner likes her dog vm and hes maining that chick

good for him? but it also happens that before that, elijah just threw the ball above the gate and into his much less friendly neighbour because he was sick of the dog asking to throw it and so yea, there is a tension between ryan and wilfred not any kind of tension, exactly the kind of elija x reader fanfic i wanted to read except pov: im a canine furry and i smoke weed on a daily basis and im a jackass

theyre almost breaking up someone does something about it i was seriously getting into it wow oh no fuck look at me tearing one or two here

rip their new born bromance? or... is it all there is to it? well see no obviously its the problem we were waiting for because when our fella enters back home and idk whatever else happens its night and his sister comes home and she goes all "lol actually i gave you placebo itd be dangerous otherwise you numbfuck" but shes quickly muted once our man notices his dog friend in his yard... its time for a reunion a heart to heart conversation to proceed so he has to ditch his sis which he casually does bros before hoes

its again about the ball which HE WILL go and fetch by passing over the fence to get in neighbours yard but damn it cant be just that? wouldnt it make a lame crappy story? we need some actions, we got the tits, the beer, no job, delinquency has no limit so fuck it says the dog as he smashes the window and enters the bikers house because he SMELLS (like he smells the shit streaks you have on your pants) the weed, ryan is like "no fuck bro no shit fuck ah-" then sees the damn weed which they steal ok? hes really a pushover he has not got the right idea of stopping being one because thats what his new friends supposed to be here for yknow trynna get his loser into a winner, that lil camper gotta level up his game, go get into the business of life barging in kicking the door to enter, no shame nor hesitation were trying to make him STEP UP for HIMSELF but guess what? ill tell you later or itd be a spoil in a spoil surely a bad paradoxal medium w/e business going on blablabla theyre up to no good thats for sure as sure as how much ryans actually enjoy this the mans into this pee slash poop affair:

spoiler alert: he does it and

im just quoting him here : he never felt more alive nor glad to be so i guess thats whats life about shitting in peoples affair, stealing weed plants and quitting your job on your first day (you havent showed up tho so w/e you never really worked in that place no one knows you its all good you can get back in that place looking innocent and smiling with your broken ribs "yea nah i never had a job here and ditched yall huh" thats foxy of him kinda but not really since he had no intention back then to do anything for himself it was all strings pulled by a fucking dog hilarious really im having a kick haha no

so what next? theyre best friends? man and dog, a wonderful friendship happens he has no more family to support him but HE HAS A DOG guys he was so into it im feeling sorry for this hobot-to-be schizophrenic man

i wont spoil you but trust me when i say not to trust a furry who eats tits on your first date

in conclusion: it was a pretty decent first episode ill update my final thoughts on the first season once im done watching it but so far its recommandable the camera work is pretty cool like its not just thoughtless filming we actually have a nice feel to it, the setting of the series is esthetically pleasing you get nice colors and it aint boring, its not like a FRIENDS episode yknow? dawg i dislike how boring it looks filming wise for start but damn i aint reviewing FRIENDS rn so next, the comedy? after all its a comedy genre series not a drama, idk if id review an actual depressive show on here thatd bum the vibe out ok? i know im making all my revs awesome w/e it is that i choose to rate and comment but still im serving you a plate of my finest sheez not any fizzle in the mizzle ok?

anyway yea the humor aint bad, i havent laughed my ass of but i did find it amusing to watch the jokes may actually kick in in the second episode ill have to update this rev alright? just hang on to your balls peeps this fam will serve in due time

rating: 7,5/10 scenery/camera work 7/10 comedy 8/10 interest/entertaining points total: 7,5/10 for a first episode is fine enough to be recommanded, like a "give it a chance" sorta case yknow isnt the most hilarious show youll watch but its fine especially if youre into homoromantic tension between a furry and elijah wood 

jk 

tg, out

[radiojamming]

lil fic for my own indulgence of josie and javier’s first kiss hell ye

also hi my name is DJ and i use the same made up town for every fic and i feel no shame! aaaand this takes place ~1896 ish, so javier’s been with the gang for about a year.

- - -

The lawmen of Copperbell must have boring lives, as apparently they’re hawkeyed enough to see trouble before it even happens. For a tiny, exhausted mining town, it’s not so much surprising as it is frustrating. Scoping for jobs and planning heists doesn’t work quite as well when those oh-so fine gentlemen of the law are hovering only a few feet away.

For Josie and Javier, it means several miserably boring days in the Peacock Hotel, waiting for the opportune moment to do something other than trying to make sense of the gaudy decorations around the hotel room and wiping the floor with drunk folks at the poker table downstairs. Copperbell’s distinctly lacking in an entertainment district (they did have a lovely travelling show come through on Thursday, advertising chickens who could jump through hoops and a goat that could eat and spit up jewelry), so Josie and Javier are mostly left to their own devices. This, decidedly, isn’t for the best.

For nearly twenty miles in each cardinal direction, there’s nothing but scrublands and washes. A train comes through twice a day, carrying the mail and a few passengers who have sought work in other, more fruitful places. Around three in the afternoon, the winds have a tendency to pick up and cause small dust storms that whip up ruddy dust devils on the main thoroughfare, rendering promenades impossible. At night, the sun dips below the violet ridge of mountains to the west and the nightlife that follows is about as lively as a boneyard. The most exciting thing is when a coyote paws through someone’s garbage.

On the late afternoon of their fifth day in Copperbell, Josie worries about the damage that Javier’s done to the left side of the door frame. It’s riddled in knife-shaped pockmarks from practicing his throws. Hours are filled with fhwip-thunk! and his footsteps, then the creak of the wicker chair in their room. 

Josie sprawls on the bed and tries to read from the hotel’s limited library. She gets about a quarter of the way through a book about the flora and fauna of the wash before she realizes that she hasn’t retained a single word. After another fhwip-thunk! thump, thump, creaaaaaaak, she decides that she’s about had enough.

“Either we need to try another town, or we do something,” she says, rubbing at her good eye which feels like it’s full of Copperbell’s famous omnipresent dust.

Javier shrugs and thumbs the tip of his knife. “Don’t know what we can do,” he says slowly, still mindful of his developing English. It’s gotten significantly better in the year that he’s been running with them. “Law’s everywhere.”

Josie grimaces and sinks back against the pillows. They’ve tried to play the newly married couple card, opting for enterprising tourists in the glorious locale of Copperbell. As far as a ruse goes, it’s a poor one. No one comes to Copperbell unless they have to, which means the law is probably right to be suspicious. That, and Javier acts like a startled rabbit whenever she introduces him as her husband.

It also doesn’t help their case that she’s apparently a new, blushing bride with an eyepatch and a limp like a pirate, and he looks like a desperado straight from a penny novel. 

He throws the knife again--fhwip-th-thunk as it misses the door frame and lands blade down on the boards--and Josie rolls onto her side, staring out the window thoughtfully. Outside, the evening has gone from burning orange to inky blue. The coyotes are probably already yipping a symphony in the distance with only the stars as their audience. It’s a waning moon tonight, so--

She sits up, startling Javier again who almost drops the knife on his foot. He stares at her, and she stares at him, a smile starting to spread across her face.

“I say we do it tonight anyway.”

“What?”

“We do the heist. That big copper magnate fella’s house that Hosea was talking about.”

Javier looks confused, and for a moment, she thinks that he didn’t understand her. Then, he shrugs. “We’ll get caught,” he says.

“Not if we’re smart. Keep to the shadows, don’t use the whole married couple bit, and do a good old fashioned house robbery before the sun comes up.”

He squints at her. “And if the law comes?”

“Then we run.” She cocks her grin like a pistol. “What are they gonna do? Chase us into the wash?”

That’d be ruination for multiple parties, and the officers would probably figure them for dead between the distance and the rattlesnakes. Fortunately, she and Javier are a little better adjusted to great swatches of wilderness than most people. 

Slowly, like the crawl of the sunrise, Javier grins at her and slides his knife back into its sheath. “Okay,” he says at last. “What can it hurt?”

- - -

Plenty, apparently.

First of all, the wealthy people of Copperbell are few and far between, and apparently very defensive of every last bit of finery in their houses. So much as an embroidered napkin goes missing and suddenly every dog in Copperbell is up and barking, and every lawman finds liberal use for his whistle.

Secondly, there are only a handful of places to hide in the town. The church is an option, but that’s just asking for a standoff with the law. There’s the aforementioned wash, but unless there’s a big enough sagebrush bush to hide both of them, it’s not something that can be done in under ten minutes. With men shouting, whistles being blown, and mutts braying like bloodhounds, their options are fewer and fewer.

At the very least, Josie’s gotten away with a pocket watch, a solid gold letter opener (with a very charming naked cherub on the top), and a lovely silver necklace. Javier hasn’t had time to list off what little he managed to grab before the shouting started. He’s a little more concerned with navigating through the shadows, as they had planned, trying to find some obscure nook that no one’s found yet. Mostly, he’s performing impressive, long-winded strings of curses in Spanish, hardly pausing to take a breath as he does it. Josie would be even more impressed if they weren’t running for their lives.

They skid around a corner, and even in the dark, Josie recognizes the back wall of the Peacock Hotel. They can’t very well burst into the lobby, covered in dust and sweat, panting like they’ve run a mile (she thinks by now, they probably have). It’s as good as a dead end, and Josie can only hope that Copperbell’s jail cells aren’t as dusty as everything else, and that they’re not fond of the noose as a primary source of entertainment.

Then, Javier yanks them back into the shadows by a pile of crates and unmarked barrels. He’s breathing hard, glancing back and forth like a pendulum in quick step. Finally, he catches his breath and nods to her. 

“I have an idea,” he says. At the same time, they hear more shouting.

“Can’t hurt, what ever it is.”

“Can’t hurt,” he agrees.

Pauses.

Looks at her with his eyes just pale flickers of light.

And kisses her like their lives depend on it. (They do.)

Josie staggers back against the wall in surprise. Javier presses her against it, his right hand rising up to her jaw, the other hand pressed against the wall beside her waist. It takes Josie a moment to realize what he’s attempting to do, and she has to give him credit for it-- It’s very clever.

She responds by hooking one arm around the back of his shoulders, and the other hand finds a spot under his coat, right at his waist. If she needs to, she can slide that hand down and grab his revolver, provided either of them stand a chance at surviving a firefight. She inches her legs apart just enough for him to slot one of his between them. As an added thought, she quickly reaches up from his shoulders to knock his hat off and ruffle his hair to make it look like they’ve been at this for awhile. She almost laughs outright when he makes an interested ‘hmm’ sound against her lips (which feels very pleasant) and returns the favor, tugging her braid loose. 

There are a few things that she realizes at that moment. One of them is that Javier is far more clever than anyone’s given him credit for. It’s been a little less than a year since Dutch picked him up, and that time has been full of lessons, small missions, and him attempting to find his niche in a gang of strangers. He hasn’t exactly been shy, per se, but he also hasn’t been given much opportunity yet to really let his skills be used to their advantage. He’s a quick thinker, and Josie makes a mental note to pass that along to Dutch and Hosea when she gets the chance.

The second realization is that he is one hell of a good kisser. She doesn’t have much to compare to, but even she knows that this is a good thing. He tilts his head just so, and his lips are warmer and softer than they look. When they finally hear the lawmen start to approach, he takes the opportunity to slide his tongue into her mouth, which technically isn’t necessary, but is a pretty good touch considering the illusion they’re trying to keep up. She responds in turn, a little happier to oblige than she probably should be. 

Someone kicks up gravel near them, and all Josie hears is, “You there! Stop-- ...Oh.”

She doesn’t look up. Javier’s not giving her much of a reason to.

The officer makes a strangled sound in the back of his throat. “I-- Uh-- P-pardon me, sir and uh-- miss.”

Josie tilts her head back just enough to speak, but Javier just occupies himself by kissing a trail down her jaw to her neck. “Missus,” she corrects. “Just married.”

She gets about three seconds to look at the stunned lawman before Javier’s kissing her properly again, and Josie’s so far from complaining that she might as well be standing on another continent.

“I... W-well, congratulations! That’s--” He clears his throat again. “Yes. Well. Carry on.”

He doesn’t linger long after that, and after another minute or so (a very, very blissful minute), the shouts and barking gets further away. Then, it’s almost completely quiet save for the soft, wet sounds of their kisses and the whipping of the wind in the eaves above them. Finally, Javier leans back and grins at her. She does the same, until both of them finally crack and laugh with relief.

“Mierda,” Javier breathes, wiping at his eyes. “That was a miracle.”

“That was brilliant, Mister Escuella,” Josie corrects. She hasn’t moved her arm from his shoulders yet, and that’s yet to bother her.

And then she sees that little bit of Javier that she’s coming to understand is the real him. That clever fox look on his face that she’s hoping to see a lot more of. “Señora Escuella, it’s been a pleasure,” he says.

They laugh again, at the absurdity of it all, at just about everything about this damn trip. Then, Josie kisses him on the cheek, and can’t ignore how Javier just seems to lean into it. “Come on,” she says. “I’m exhausted, and I don’t think they’re gonna bother us now.”

They stumble into the lobby of the Peacock, arms around each other, dizzy and grinning. For the first time, Josie thinks they probably actually look like the newlyweds they’ve been claiming to be, and that thought makes her laugh again as the receptionist gives them a polite smile.

And honestly, the sleep that follows is probably the best Josie has ever had.

[afrofairysblog]

I gasped when I saw this like they are so CUTE!!!!!

sydcarmy if they were fucking cool