#but get in the water needed its own recognition

[catboybiologist]

One of the most interesting facets of the human body is the way our brains sometimes "generate" information. The brain can't stand being unstimulated, so lacking sensory stimuli, it invents or exaggerates stuff on its own.

It's like the blind spot in your eye, which is filled in by the brain. But it manifests in so many other ways too. Think about getting up in the middle of the night, let's say to get a glass of water. It's dark, and silent. So your brain desperately tries to fill in gaps of perception.

As you slide off the bed, you'll swear your ears are picking up the sound of your own footsteps, even if you're stepping lightly and without any kind of footwear. In this case, there's very real senses that your brain is amplifying, and maybe even misinterpreting- the pressure of weight on your feet being "misread" as something different.

The kitchen is a place with so many smell-heavy memories associated with it. As you enter it with your empty cup, olfaction centers in your brain will start going wild trying to create something from nothing to fill in that gap. Usually, the experience of this is a faint, almost metal-tinged scent, kind of what you smell on the metal slide of a hot playground.

Your vision is not exempt from this as well, especially in areas of high contrast. If the interior of your apartment is dark, and there's soft light coming in from nearby windows, your neurons cling to that. At the periphery of your vision, you might start to notice the light "dance" a little. Shadows will blend just a tad as your sensory neurons try to keep up with changing lighting conditions. Sometimes, your brain fills in this "movement" as familiar shapes.

The burble of water coming from the sink is a comparative sensory feast for your brain, and it almost dispels all other "false" inputs.

When the sink is shut off, though, your brain is going into overdrive. It just got what it needed, and it now expects that level of stimulation- so it's gonna start inventing all sorts of things. You might start to see those dancing shadows in areas for smaller contrast now- lights from kitchen clocks, color changes or art on your walls, indicator lights on computers- coalescing into strange, thin humanoid shapes that dispel the moment you look at them. Makes sense though- humans are what we see moving around the most on a day to day basis, and our brains just work on pattern recognition. They fill in what you know, and when you add more information by taking a peek, your brain settles down.

Walking back to your bed, you might notice that the footsteps that once seemed so loud now don't seem loud enough, as if the sound is falling dead before it can carry. The floorboards, which used to make you jump when they creaked, now make no sound. Your brain is slowly normalizing, and doesn't need to fill in those gaps anymore. Hopefully that will help you get back to a restful sleep.

You lie down back in your bed, take a sip of that water, and for a moment look at the room around you. As you slowly fall asleep, the last errant "misfirings" of your brain will come together in more "comprehensive" ways. The dancing shadows from your peripheral vision might start showing up in your direct line of sight. They'll probably look like a figure coming towards you, as those shadows occupy more of your vision. Pattern recognition is a powerful thing!

The last moments before you fall asleep are where your mind is going wild, trying to put together so many different inputs, both real and false. You might feel chills, or even a cold hand on your leg. It'll pull from memory as well. As darkness falls across your vision, the shadows may contort into the face of a loved one you left behind long ago, sitting atop a wiery, inhuman body.

Make sure to get a restful sleep, and ignore these stimuli. Ignore the feeling of breathe in your neck when you close your eyes. Ignore the feeling of your blankets parting as you drift away. Ignore the figure that was formed from those shadows. They'll be gone come morning.

They'll be gone come morning.

They'll be gone come morning.

They'll be gone come mo

[thegremlininmyhead]

Get In The Water is truly amazing, my favourite, my everything

Stevens voice

The music

The waves in the background

100000000000000000/10, no notes, exceeded all my expectations

[ur-humble-overlord]

every time i feel like im ready to explode i am granted a new horror to my shit sandwich

[pastryfication]

love at first fire | lando norris

part of the love at first . . . series

you’re jolted awake by the shrill scream of the fire alarm, cutting through the silence of the night like a knife. groggy and disoriented, you sit up, heart racing, trying to make sense of the sudden chaos. it takes a moment for the reality to sink in—the alarm is real, and you need to get out.

you fumble in the dark, grabbing the first things within reach: your phone, your keys, a hoodie you pull over your sleep-rumpled hair. the alarm continues its relentless wail as you slip into your shoes, barely managing to shove your feet in as you head for the door.

the hallway is a blur of movement, neighbors rushing out of their apartments, eyes wide with panic and confusion. the air is thick with the scent of smoke, faint but unmistakable, urging you to move faster. you join the stream of people heading for the stairs, your mind racing as fast as your feet.

outside, the cool night air hits you like a splash of water. you’re on the street now, along with the rest of the building’s residents, all of you looking up at the structure that’s been your home, now alive with flashing lights and the distant sound of sirens. the alarm is still blaring, muffled but persistent, a constant reminder of the danger you’ve just escaped.

you’re shivering, partly from the cold, partly from the adrenaline still coursing through your veins. you pull your hoodie tighter around yourself, scanning the crowd, searching for familiar faces, but mostly, just trying to calm your racing heart.

and then you see him.

at first, it’s just a face in the crowd, someone standing a few feet away, hands shoved into the pockets of a jacket, dark hair tousled as if he’d just rolled out of bed. which, you realize, he probably has. his expression mirrors your own—confused, a little dazed, and clearly not expecting to be outside at this hour.

your heart skips a beat. he notices you looking, and for a split second, your eyes meet. you feel a jolt, like a current running through your body, something electric and undeniable. it’s not just recognition, it’s something deeper, something that makes the world tilt on its axis, leaving you momentarily breathless.

he takes a step closer, his eyes still locked on yours, and you realize he’s coming over. your mind races, searching for something to say, but all words seem to have abandoned you, leaving you with nothing but the sound of your own pounding heart.

“crazy night, huh?” he says, his voice warm and tinged with a hint of a smile, as if the situation isn’t entirely unwelcome.

you manage a nod, still struggling to find your voice. “yeah, not exactly how i planned on spending it.”

he chuckles, and the sound comforts you. “same here. didn’t expect to meet anyone at this hour either.”

there’s a pause, the kind that should be awkward but isn’t. instead, it feels like a moment suspended in time, something fragile and precious that neither of you wants to break.

“you live here?” he asks, nodding toward the building behind you.

“yeah,” you say, finally finding your voice. “third floor.”

“me too,” he says, and there’s something in the way he says it that makes you wonder how you never ran into him before. “funny how we’ve probably passed each other a hundred times and never noticed.”

“guess it took a fire alarm to bring us together,” you say, and you can’t help but smile.

he grins back, and for a moment, the world around you fades—the noise, the people, the flashing lights. it’s just the two of you, standing in the middle of the street in the dead of night, and it feels like the most natural thing in the world.

“maybe we should do something less dramatic next time,” he says, his tone light, but his eyes serious.

“i’d like that,” you reply, feeling a warmth spread through you that has nothing to do with the fire.

you can’t shake the feeling that there’s something familiar about him, something you can’t quite place. but it doesn’t matter, not really. what matters is the way he’s looking at you, like you’re the only person in the world, like this is a moment that’s meant to be.

and as the two of you stand there, you start to talk—about the building, about the chaos of the night, about everything and nothing at all. he’s easy to talk to, and you find yourself laughing despite the situation, the tension of the night melting away.

it’s not until the fire trucks arrive, lights flashing and engines rumbling, that you catch a glimpse of something that makes you pause. one of the firefighters does a double-take when he sees him, and then, as if realizing who he is, offers a small, knowing smile.

you glance back at the guy standing next to you, your heart skipping a beat as the pieces start to fall into place. the familiar face, the way he carries himself, the recognition in the firefighter’s eyes—it all clicks.

he catches your expression, a small smile playing on his lips. “you just realized, didn’t you?”

you feel your cheeks flush with embarrassment. “i . . . yeah,” you admit, unable to keep the smile off your face. “you’re lando norris.”

“guilty,” he says with a grin. “but let’s keep it between us, yeah? at least for tonight.”

and just like that, in the middle of the chaos, you realize that something has shifted, something new has begun. it’s not just the fire that’s burning—it’s the start of something between you and lando, something that feels like it was meant to be.

and as you stand there, side by side, lando’s hand slowly reach in down to intertwine with yours, you know that this is a night you’ll never forget. the night everything changed. the night you met him. the night of love at first fire.

[tarjapearce]

Ok, ok, ok, hear me out….

Tarzan Miguel…

Ahh, nonny. Casually just saw this scrumptious fanart of him as Tarzan by @Miuworm in X 🫠. And yeah. (Kinda amazed at how you guys manifest these things 🤭)

Like Me

Tarzan! Miguel O'Hara x Reader.

WARNINGS: nothing too bad. Depictions of violence, a bit of implicit gore and animal death. No proofread.

Summary: Your savior from a certain death is quite touchy-feely.

Another for Miguelverse ❤️✨

The furious waves of the sea clashed over your body, submerging it in the freezing and alive water.

Arms moved, swimming your way back up, gasping for a much needed gulp of air as soon as you reached the surface.

Peeking around you, trying to find something to get a hold of or climb on, exhaustion was crawling up to your limbs, like hypothermia.

Fuck

Mind cursed with every foul word you could've imagine. How did trip ended up like this? In what moment the clouds turned so grey they darkened the sky, announcing a downpour with a loud rumble? It all took minutes to go sour and south.

You were there to do a land recognition, and see if you could get home some new species. Sergei Kravinoff, or Kraven The Hunter, was the lead of your expedition, all financed by a man named Kingpin.

Your name was called, echoed in the distance.

"Over here!!" You flailed your arms in an attempt of being seen, and hopefully the debris wouldn't blear their sight to find you.

You swam in the direction of the voice, teeth clattered, tool belt heavy on your hips, but you knew if you lost them, any possible chance of getting another were impossible. Plus, Kraven hated it when you lost your equipment as they weren't cheap.

Every paddle of your arms felt heavier, like if your wrists had been tied up with iron pounds, dragging you down. Lips turned blue and trembled. Salty and cold water doused you, but you weren't to give up.

You had fought your way to get a spot in this expedition and a pathetic ending like drowning wasn't an option. You spotted a wooden board floating nearby.

C'mon!

Your hands stretched towards it anf finally managed to keep yourself afloat. Panting, groaning and shivering, letting the cold to finally sink in. Feet had started to numb out, ragged breaths turned laborious.

Once more someone called you, this time you recognised the voice. Peter, the other nerd according to Kraven. You two were the ones selected to be the scientist that would lead Kraven to a certain victory in Nueva York.

Ever since Norman Osborn and Otto Octavius had discovered new species of spiders and reptiles, everyone proclaimed them geniuses ahead of their time, leaving the hunting behind.

Kraven was set into getting either a new species or something alike to regain his forlorn glory. He refused to be forgotten.

But everything pointed that the island you were now had a mind of its own. As if preventing anyone to delve in further into it's secrets.

You were pulled out from the board by Peter that immediately covered you up in a raggedy blanket. Despite the fabric being old, it gave you enough warmth to avoid death taking a hold on you.

Kraven cursed in russian, but was hopeful y'all be found soon. The ship's black box was ruined, your luggage at least was minimal, and it was enough to be saved by ether Peter or anyone kind enough.

A powerful and enormous wave had turned the boat upside-down. Knocking everything loose out of the board. The guns and other tools were the only things that survived.

But, you hoped, the whole fiasco was just temporary. Fisk wasn't a careless man, he'd probably send help soon. You closed your eyes for a moment, letting your bones to freeze.

----

You woke up nearby the makeshift fireplace, relishing the heat your body had lacked. Clothes were humid, but no longer soaked and freezing.

Sighing, you stirred awake, letting the tension leave your body with a groan.

"Hey, wake up." Peter approached, concern etched into his features as he helped you on your feet.

"Where's everyone?"

"I... We uh, got lost. One moment Kraven is here and the other he's not. Left us behind. Or, he also got lost."

"Kraven? Lost?" Peter could sense the deadpan in your voice and he sighed, exasperated.

"I'm just trying to light up the mood. He was pissed. So I assume that he just thought he'd do it himself." He shrugged and you sighed, rubbing your neck.

"Great! now we're lost, my luggage is nowhere to be found but at least we have tools, right?"

The faltering in Peter's face made yours to fall as he shook his head.

"God, I swear... Fuck him. If I'm discovering something, Ain't sharing with him!"

"Let's focus on surviving first. The soil is rich, meaning the jungle is nearby."

"And so is the wild life." You sighed and Peter groaned.

"Look, thinking negatively won't take us anywhere. I'm not saying either let's throw a party for being stuck in an unknown place. But we gotta move. It's about to get dark."

"Right... You're right" You rubbed your face, exhausted, at least you weren't freezing anymore. But being at Nature's mercy wasn't pretty either, yet again. You were selected by none other than Sergei. If he trusted your judgement to be valuable enough, why couldn't you?

With a new resolution in mind, you took the raggedy blanket and other little tools Peter managed to salvage and soon ventured yourselves in the thickness of the jungle.

-----

Sun had long disappeared in the sky leaving a faint trail of golden and orange in the clouds, and you were certain that it had been hours since you walked in the jungle. No signs of Kraven or the caravan of people.

No signs of society or at least his stupid russian jokes that you were sure people laughed at by sheer convenience.

The only advantage Kraven possessed in his favor, was him being an avid hunter. You only studied species, animals and flowers to be more precise, and had a little knowledge of mechanics. Enough to fix your own machines and trinkets. Peter was an expert in mechanics and soil. You followed him.

"I think I've seen that rock before" Peter sighed as he slouched against a tree.

"Don't say that, Parker." You wheezed as you followed him, resting your aching back against him. "I'm definitely finding some poison and put it on Kraven's drink."

"Relax. Without us he's going into unknown territory."

"In case you haven't noticed, he's a professional hunter. And I hate with passion skirts."

The distant rumble of a storm approaching echoed through the sky.

"A hunter, not a geologist. He acts like an animal to get animal bodies."

"Still, he knows his way around these places, Pete."

"Shooting things till they're dead isn't knowing about things"

Peter stood and offered his hand.

"Uh-uh I just sat down."

"We gotta at least go upwards. This area is prone to flooding."

With a vexed groan you took Peter's hand and he pulled you up. You were tired of walking, but if he said you needed to advance, you obeyed.

"Fuck..."

----

Despite the soaking rain pouring around you, Peter had found an amalgamation of trees and branches supported by a hollow tree.

Birds chirped and cawed, bugs joined the concert once the rain subsided, the distant flapping of the birds and the rustle of leafs prevented you from lowering your guard. The only comforting thing besides Peter's company was the petrichor smell, pungent in the air.

You'd spend hours inhaling the gift of nature, if it wasn't for your belly grumbling, and Peter had ran out of cashews.

Even crickets sounded tempting to eat. With the right spices, they tasted crunchy. But all you could do was to imagine their taste as it was time to move again.

"Knowing Kraven, he'd go up to the mountains, probably they've sent a camp nearby a river. So let's look for one."

"Yeah, even better so I can drown that fucker in. He better pay us good for this stupid prank."

Peter chuckled and looked around for a minute, his blue eyes narrowed upon setting his sight in a tree trunk. Broken in half, but what truly made his... whatever this unpleasant feeling to rise within was the vicious marks indented on the tree bark.

Powerful scratches filled with bloody chum and crimson liquid, paw like marks painted in the trunk. The source of such gruesome spectacle laid in whatever pieces was left a couple of inches away.  He could make out a tail, and small hind legs. A baby monkey, or rather half of it.

"Uh... We better hurry."

Peter swallowed, and the urgency in his tone only made your worry to shoot heavenwards.

You both walked, speeding up the step. Unaware of the keen eyes, hidden in the bushes that followed your every moves like a hawk. A low growl filled in the space he occupied.

---

You were certainly to die.

Undeniably, and it didn't matter how fast you managed to run, the jaguar quick paced trotting had you pushing your limits. Tears blurred your sight, as a garbled sob escaped your lips.

Scratches adorned your arms, decorating your flesh with fresh oozing wounds, dirt and leafs stuck to your marred flesh.

Chest heaved with deep and ragged pants, wobbly legs menaced to give in under the pressure at any second

You were going to die.

Even though life had been incredibly dull and the only comfort was your investigation, you didn't want it to end so soon. Not whenyou were about to accomplish a promise to yourself.

Peter had gone lost and separated once the chase began. One minute he was before you, and the other, your friend was gone, out of sight and reach. But the relentless giant feline behind you preferred you. An easy prey.

Your wails and cries for help fell upon deaf ears, who would listen to you in the middle of the jungle? For once you wished to have Kraven's gun expertise.

You didn't care if hypocrite defined you right now. You took a thick branch, swinging it with difficulty and pain at the euphoric beast, like a demotivated baseball player. But the jaguar's claws swatted the useless weapon away from your hands, and making you stumble on the ground.

This was it.

Oh God, oh my god, no, no no

The animal pounced and by instinct, you shielded your body with your shaky limbs. But no harm came.

You could feel the beast's warm and bloodthirsty breath on your head, snapping it's maws at you, desperately trying to reach for a bite of your supple flesh.

Eyes wide in horror, and disbelief. The jaguar was held by his tail, earning whoever that was holding it back from devouring you a couple of swings with it's sharp claws. But the animal was set into getting to you. It pounced on your boots, claws sinking on the back of hour ankles, earning a sobbing and painful wail.

A gruesome crack and a roar echoed behind you, and only then you were able to see your savior.

The tallest man you've ever seen, even taller than Kraven, strong and well built physique, a rich tanned skin full of scratches and long healed wounds. Hair long, reaching a bit past his shoulders, muscles that heaved and rippled in every breathing you did. Body hair etched beautifully in his skin.

Covered in nothing but a loincloth.

If it wasn't for you being at the death's gates, you'd take your time to study him.

You gasped as he held the oversized cat with his hands and slammed it on the ground. They circled eachother, shifting between the roles of hunter and prey.

The feline hissed, and the man returned the threat, a cold sweat ran down your spine upon watching two overgrown canines, on his mouth. Fangs. He had fangs. Brown eyes stared at the four legged monster, defying it.

And soon the jaguar took his invitation. The two majestic creatures fought, enraged, proving their prowess to eachother, disputing the role of Alpha within the jungle's hierarchy. They rolled on the ground, biting and clawing at eachother.

With a lurid snap the man cracked the beast's neck, earning an agonizing wail from the mean cat. He staggered before slamming his fist on the animal, forcing the last breaths out of the beast.

His nose flared, proudly, while his hands slammed his chest.

Terror was still taking a hold of you, and there was nothing you could use as a weapon. Your hands braced your shoulder as you tried to carefully stand, but your clumsy feet stepped in a branch, snapping it in half, like the jaguar's neck. Brown eyes were immediately on you.

You swallowed hard.

He approached, hunched and prowling over, his knuckles and toes supported his hulking frame.

"S-Stop!"

He quirked an eyebrow, curious and within seconds he was before you.

Breath hitched on your throat, face so close to yours, he could feel your breath blowing on his chin.

You hissed as he took a hold of your arm, examining the damage. There wasn't rage in his features but nothing more than untampered curiosity.

His hands reached for your hair, sniffing the strands, you couldn't help but giggle when his nose hovered over your head, sniffing you, a bad moment to be ticklish, really.

Breath caught again as his nose nuzzled your neck.

"W-Wai-" His fingers prodded at your lips, rubbing the calloused thumbs on your soft mouth. A satisfied grunt rumbled in his firm and hairy chest

He toyed with your face, examining it with child like wonder. He turned, prodded and licked your cheeks, reminiscing in your taste with a confused look.

"U-uh, sir-"

What is he doing? oh god.

He hunched even closer to rest his ear on your chest. Heart pumping violently inside your ribcage, eyes darted towards the covered mounds, he sank his face in between them, taking a deep inhale. A low growl came from within and your cheeks flared in a deep flush.

Oh shit, shit

His hands cupped your mounds, sending a shiver through your body, but you slapped his hand away. He looked taken aback before baring his teeth to you.

"No!" You covered your chest and backed away, but his nose flared to then grab your head and placed it on his chest a tad forcefully. Warm and plush skin met yours. You gulped again.

Powerful echoes boomed through his chest.

The natural musk of him tickled your senses, his hands roamed your lower back and your alarms flared.

"H-hey, hey!"

He pulled your feet up, sending you tumbling backward, skirt rolling down your thighs, exposing your legs to him.

You tried to cover your skin by gathering your skirt up. His nose again sniffled as your wriggled underneath him. Hands prodding and picking at your toes, earning a clumsy giggle

His touch was like molten lava, it sent a shudder down your spine.

His fingers were having a good feel of your flesh, as if confirming you were real.

With each discovery his interest only grew. He then cupped your face again, smooshing your cheeks together, giving a deliberate lick on your lips.

"T-The polite thing to do is to take me out before that happens!" You mumbled nervously while trying to get yourself free.

His eyes narrowed once more as he lifted up your skirt completely, revealing your panties.

It gave you little to no time to prepare you for his next move. He sunk his face in between your thighs taking a good whiff of your scent, another pleasant growl came from him, by reflex, your hand slapped him. And this made him look at you, confused but clearly upset while holding his cheek.

"No! Stop it!" You warned while gathering your skirt underneath your knees and pointing at him. Cheeks impossibly red

He seemed to understand as he crouched before you. Muscular thighs flexing as he sat, mimicking your actions.

"Uh, uh. No. Don't do that"

"Uh Uh, No. Don't do that"

He repeated with the same authoritarian tone. Voice surprisingly rich and alluring. Your eyes went wide.

"You can speak!"

He repeated like a parrot.

"Can... Can you understand me?"

His brows furrowed then quirked. He was about to come up with a reply when the rustling and your name being called echoed behind the foliage.

"Over here!!!" You shouted, this alarmed the man as he stood, backing up from you with a mistrustful glare.

"Wait! No no! Don't go!" Your hands wriggled, but it was futile.

He left before anyone could see him. Climbing the trees like it was another playground game, until he disappeared out of sight.

None other than Kraven showed up, machete on hand, swinging it the weeds and plants that dared to cross his way.

A shit eating smirk plastered on his face.

"See? I told you, she'd be fine." Kraven patted Peter's shoulder as they kept moving to find a perfect spot for the camp.

Kraven crouched to where the jaguar's body laid and looked at you.

"What happened?"

"I... don't know. I-I panicked. Was running from a snake and I found that there."

Sergei just hummed, as he watched the body, eyes raking the feline's carcass before beckoning two of his men closer.

"Skin him. Don't have this type yet."

Kraven took a deep inhale. Death's stench sparking alive the hunter in him.

"Whatever killed it, needs to be in my personal collection of trophies."

Peter in the meantime cleansed your wounds with water, to then apply some clean bandages on them.

The whole group moved, upwards to the mountains.

"What the heck happened!?" he whispered aggressively

You made sure for Kraven to be within a reasonable distance to speak again.

"You won't believe me if I'd tell you."

Cause in truth, how would you explain a man, taller than Sergei, killed with his bare hands a wild animal and got way too touchy with you but is able to speak?

The road was long. You had time

Peter sensed your discomfort and pressed no further. However, the feeling of being watched never waned. It was the group, against the jungle's secrets.

----

Taglist:

@fayeofthenightingale

[kalki-tarot]

GOOD THINGS HAPPENING FOR YOU IN NEXT 6 MONTHS ✧˖°.

Timeless | pick a picture | Masterlist

Tarot is not 100% correct all the times and does not replace medical or professional treatment. Your destiny lies in your own hands and you create your own reality. Kalki tarot is not responsible for any decisions made on behalf of this reading by anyone.

Pile 1

You are finally walking away from things that don't serve you in the next 6 months

Your hard work will be acknowledged by your seniors or superiors

Someone will offer you a helping hand or emotional support

Small investments will convert into big profits

Your intuition will increase and you will connect more to your higher self

Someone's true nature will be revealed to you (water sign, masculine energy)

Some truth will come to surface and will be known to you

A love message / offer / confession on valentine's day

You will gain stability after a long time of being drained

An exciting text message!

New friends, new people and new communication

Pile 02

You are getting the needed rest and relaxation

A trip of travel / break from work and going on a vacation

People who don't match up your energy are finally leaving your life in next 6 months

You will be blessed with Material abundance and generational wealth

A result coming in your favour

Your Emotional well being improving

Mental clarity and a state of letting go of things that don't serve you anymore

Alignment with your goals

You are getting some reward or recognition for your hard work

A manifestation is coming to you in the 3d

A successful deal will take place and things will go your way

A new relationship is forming here, something you were anxious about will go very well according to your plans

Pile 03

Your dream wedding is taking place

A party or meetup with friends and family

Your family and you are having a great time and things are being resolved by their own

A communication is coming fastly towards you which you were waiting for a long period of time

A wish fulfilment

International travel

Your trauma is being healed in the next 6 months

Maybe you will finally meet a therapist or a nurturing human being who will help u heal and serve an important purpose in your life

Balance and harmony in your mental state

Things are getting better for you

Something about your moon sign will be beneficial for you, or some astrology related thing happening with your moon sign in your favour

You will receive a bouquet of flowers

You will go to a beach / water body for relaxation

You learn something about your ex which will help u move on from them / their true nature will be revealed to you through divine intervention for your betterment

You will finally complete or break a karmic cycle.

Pile 04

A mental conflict or fight will get resolved

You are advised to not spend too much money on useless things

You will do some charity work or just volunteer for people

You will know some divine secret

A wish is getting fulfilled in the next 6 months

If you are thinking of confessing your love to someone, do it! They will day yes to you!

You will finally leave your comfort zone and go out on a date

Something significant from the past will inspire you to start something new soon

A new beginning in something is quickly on its way to you

You will be presented lot's of options in love or career to choose from

You will finally rise from the ashes

Your family or loved ones will help you with something with which u are struggling rn

A situationship will come to an end and will being communication

Things may get delayed for you but they are coming on the right time

[pickingupmymercedes]

An impossible dream - Lewis Hamilton

request: "hey!you are so good in writing angst and I feel there's a lack of angst with lh and sometimes i just want a heavy heart 🫣 but i was listening to beyonce and her song best thing i never had made me wish to read something like that with lewis"

pairing: Lewis Hamilton x Reader!

warnings: angsty, Lewis being kind of a jerk (but not really)

wordcount: +1K

a/n: Sorry it took this long anon, but I hope it gives you all the feels, because it did for me.

As always, I'm open for feedback, come say hi!

______________________________________________________________

The opulence of the Monaco in a Grand Prix weekend shimmered around as the warm glow of the setting sun bathed the city in its usual golden hue. Y/n and her husband cruised through the narrow, winding streets in his collection worthy of a car. The engine purred smoothly, a low, contrasting hum to the noise of her own mind as they made their way to a party very few could ever get close to.

Her husband reached over and took her hand, his touch gentle and reassuring. "You've been quiet" he said, glancing at her with concern. "Are you okay?"

She turned to him, managing a small smile. "Just nervous to be back in Monaco," she replied, barely above a whisper before she continued "I have a lot of past history in these streets" she admitted, her voice carrying a mixture of nostalgia and pain.

He nodded, understanding deepening in his eyes. "Is it because of your ex?" She hesitated for a moment before nodding and he squeezed her hand, a silent show of affection.

"I've seen how it affects you, still" he replied softly. "I'm happy to wait until you're comfortable to talk about it."

"Thank you for never pushing" she said, her gratitude genuine.

He smiled, bringing her hand to his lips for a tender kiss. "You’re really the best thing that’s ever happened to me" he said, his voice filled with love.

She saw him before he saw her, the man whose name once caused her heart to race faster than his car on the track and she instinctively tightened her grip on her husband's arm.

He noticed the man beside her, and then his gaze dropped to her left hand, where the large diamond ring sparkled under the golden lights. His expression turned unreadable, a myriad of emotions: shock, recognition, questioning, and even a composed understanding.

As the night wore on, and her husband was eventually pulled into conversations with some business magnates, she was left momentarily alone, drifting towards the balcony, seeking solace in the night breeze and the endless horizon of the sea. The memories of past sunrises in this very place, leaving a bittersweet and relentless feeling.

"Y/n." His voice was a soft murmur behind her, as gentle as the evening wind. She closed her eyes for a moment, steeling herself before turning to face him.

"Lewis," she acknowledged, her voice steady despite the turmoil inside.

"Do you even remember those sunrises?" He took a step closer, the faint scent of his cologne bringing back a rush of memories.

She looked away, back towards the dark waters. "Please, don't." she whispered; her voice almost lost in the breeze.

"What's happened, Y/n? Why did you disappear?" His tone was soft, but insistent.

She took a deep breath, trying to calm the storm inside her. "Some people need to grow up and stop chasing impossible dreams" she said, her voice more composed than she felt.

"Is that what you think we were? An impossible dream?" His eyes boring into hers, searching for the truth.

She met his gaze, her eyes betraying the pain she had buried. "I couldn't keep pretending, Lewis. Being a satellite to you, yet always on the outside... It was killing me. I needed stability, something real."

"Is that what you have now?" He nodded towards the crowd inside. "With him?"

"He makes me feel safe" she replied, her voice firm.

He looked at her, his expression a mix of sadness and frustration. "Are you happy, Y/n? Truly happy?"

Her heart ached at his words, but she forced herself to keep her composure "Happiness wasn’t a luxury I could quite afford. Not anymore."

He shook his head, stepping closer until there was little to no space between them, his perfume making her dizzy. "You deserve more than just safety. You deserve to be loved, completely and unconditionally."

"And you think you could have given me that?" A tear threatening to slip down her cheek, the tinge of anger to her voice just as she quickly looked up and closed her eyes.

"I know I could have" he said softly, his voice filled with conviction. "I loved you, Y/n. I still do."

She looked back at him, the weight of his gaze and words pressing down on her made her laugh. "Gosh, I wanted you so bad... But, it's too late now, Lewis."

"Don't you ever wonder what could have been?" He asked, his voice teasingly sweet.

"I used to. I’m through with that, though." she admitted, her voice trembling. "He is my life now."

He reached out, taking her hands in his just as she turned to look at him again. "You don't have to settle for safety, Y/n. Not when you could have so much more. It's never too late, you know?!"

"I'm pregnant." She blurred out; her voice steady but not above a whisper.

Lewis froze, his eyes dropping to her belly. He blinked, processing her words. 

"It's still early days." Her hand instinctively going to her still-flat stomach as she felt the need to explain herself, even after all this time.

He swallowed hard, the weight of her words sinking in. "I just... Make sure your happy, okay?! This kid needs you at your best."

"I know" she whispered, her voice breaking slightly as he turned from her and she understood the cue.

As she rejoined her husband, she felt as if a piece of her heart had been left behind in the shadows of that balcony.

Her husband’s eyes lit up. Relief and affection evident in his expression as his arms encircled her. He kissed her head tenderly from the side, his lips brushing her hair. "Are you both alright?" he asked softly.

She nodded, forcing a smile as she looked up at him. "Yeah, someone's perfume made me nauseous, just needed a little breather."

Her husband smiled warmly, and she leaned into his embrace, seeking comfort in the familiarity and security he offered.

As they stood together, surrounded by the opulence of the setting, she couldn't help but glance back at the balcony, where Lewis remained, a solitary figure against the backdrop of their shared memories, his eyes still locked on her as they would always be, as long as they kept bumping into each other.

______________________________________________________________

TAGLIST - @saturnssunflower @xoscar03 @chocolatediplomatdreamerzonk @happy-golden-hour @vicurious28

@0710khj @thecubanator2 @neilakk @bigratbitchsworld @adriswrld

@fearfam69691 @cmleitora @goldenroutledge @timmychalametsstuff @jpgnsf @priopp123

If you’d like to be added to my taglist you can leave a comment or send me a dm/ask.

[crguang]

violinist kafka x her pianist accompaniment reader, courtesy of my 🎹 anon and @shalomniscient’s beautiful brain <3 we’ve been going crazy over this AU since i received the ask today.

R and kafka are childhood best friends who have been playing together since their respective instructors discovered their potential and made them work together on a piece, very much young prodigies in the making who do nothing but hone their skills with the dream of becoming the best in their field. one day, when they’re around 16 years old, R moves away. this bus ride is the last memory kafka holds of them together and she remembers it viscerally whenever she brings an especially complex composition to life, which eventually becomes the source of her recognition and success. this is a goodbye she only understands once she’s lost them.

607. i miss you.

//

You held her hand that early evening on the way to the bus stop on the corner street four minutes from the music academy; your pinky finger loosely looped with hers and in the chill of February, she could feel the rough material of your knitted glove against her own, the one gifted to you by an aunt she doesn’t remember the name of. Fingertips linked like an implicit promise, she spared you a questioning glance at the unusual gesture and you avoided her gaze, making a show of scrolling through a playlist on your MP3 player with your free hand. She thinks of it as holding hands now, because despite your palms not touching at the time, your bodies were connected through that fragile bridge between your fingers and your hands swayed in the air with your unhurried steps. Each of her exhales were made visible by the cold while you kept yours within the confines of the scarf around your neck, you always despised the drop in temperature. Even with the bottom half of your head hidden by the soft fabric, she could read the reservation on the lines of your face. You were keeping something in and it was obvious to her who had known you since that Wednesday you sat in her every-day rehearsal room, patiently waiting with her violin instructor and a faraway look in your eyes. Back then, it had been eight years. Perhaps that isn’t accurate, she has known you a total of eight years up to the present day. That is the only constant between you, whoever you are today she does not know.

Kafka chuckles lowly to herself, a self-deprecating sound. After all this time, she still needs this moment of reminiscence before she dares put the bow to her violin’s sacred strings. If this is what puts her in the state of mind necessary to perform this composition flawlessly, so be it. She inhales long and slow, then exhales quietly through her mouth. She raises her right hand and in one controlled motion, slides the bow over the first note of her instrument. 

The 607 bus was half empty when you stepped on it first. You paid the bus fare and she followed you to the back after doing the same. You took the seat next to a window tainted with water streaks and silently took the violin case from her hands to lay part of it on your thigh, the other half rested on her leg the entire ride home, its small weight shared like the rest of your burdens. She took the earphone you handed her and pressed a little closer to you to see what you were showing her on your MP3. The bus started moving a second later. 

“I don’t want something too loud this time,” you said, scrolling down the music app where you’d created playlists for each other a year prior. 

“Lame.”

“You chose the playlist yesterday, you don’t get to complain. This one is nice.”

You pressed play on a slow song and lifted your head to meet her eyes expectantly as the first melodies reached her ear. She conceded with a nonchalant shrug of her shoulders. You smiled, a soft edge to it, and didn’t tear your gaze from hers for a moment that Kafka now wonders if it lasted seconds or minutes. You looked into her eyes, searching for something she didn’t have the guts to confess, and she looked back at you with the words on her lips. They were often there, sitting just past her lips like they’d fly out of her mouth the instant she opened it, but she found that they were anchored to her tongue and had no plan to leave the warmth of their comfort zone. Her eyebrows twitched in question for the second time that hour, an unsure smile on her face in response to your stare.

“What?”

Her attempt to glimpse into your mind broke the suspended moment. You shook your head somewhat ruefully.

“Nothing.”

You lowered your MP3 and followed the movement with your eyes, avoiding hers once again. She could see something brewing inside of you since that morning, guilt you couldn’t admit to her, maybe, but she didn’t push thinking you would speak up eventually. Instead, she playfully nudged your side with an elbow.

“Practice used up your last brain cells or what?”

“Ha, ha. Like you weren’t the one struggling to keep up with the tempo.”

“Try again, maybe the next lie will be more convincing.”

“Oh, sorry, I forgot Kafka The Prodigy could never make a mistake, ever. I’m only the accompaniment, what would I know?”

“That’s more like it.”

You lifted your eyes to the sky, but the smile that replaced the weird one you were previously giving her was much more brilliant. You glanced at her, then turned your head to the window. An older couple were quietly chatting to themselves a few rows to the left in front of you, their heads leaning against each other, and she spent a minute looking at them while the next song played in your earphones. With the music, it was impossible to catch what one was saying to the other, but that didn’t matter. Their bodies were pressed together like yours with hers, as if huddling for warmth, and the woman was talking with her hands the way you would when you were passionate about a new album you just discovered. She didn’t notice it then, that she was looking for you in others even as you sat next to her. Her world was so small; you and music, music and you, and those hours where the two were one and the same. 

To this day, you are the music she plays. Your harmonious smiles and dulcet voice, they are all within the melodies she borrows from other composers and in a sense, you are always on stage next to her during a performance. In the practice room, Kafka furrows her brows. She feels it mounting in her, that feeling that makes her great, akin to a pulsing heart ascending to her throat until it lodges itself between her vocal chords and she lets the violin speak for her. The climax approaches steadily, she knows that part like the back of her hand. 

She lost interest in the talking couple. You were still looking outside the window at the swaying tree branches and passing cars, and she wondered what was so interesting out there that you couldn’t look at her. She watched your eyelids droop, though you stayed awake and kept staring at the world beyond the two of you. The song in her ear had a bass that followed her heartbeat. It wasn't sad, but you were. Streetlights had come on to balance out the rapidly vanishing sunlight and each one illuminated your features in fleeting rays of yellow, your eyes were hazy and your lips no longer smiling for her, and strands of hair brushed your temple whenever you adjusted your head on the glass. She followed the smooth lines of your brows down to the bridge of your nose, then to the curve of your upper lip. On her lap, her fingers twitched and curled into a loose fist. Her gaze went unnoticed, you were entirely enticed by the world beyond her reach and she was enthralled by the sadness on your face that added years to your current age of merely sixteen. You knew something she didn’t, she was sure of it, but no sound came out of her mouth after she parted her lips to ask. You swallowed, and her eyes flitted to the lump in your throat before settling back on your fluttering lashes. She suddenly perceived a distance between you that made her deeply uncomfortable and that feeling sat on her chest until your bus stop approached and you finally straightened up to look back at her. You smiled weakly, and Kafka spent years regretting not saying anything as you hesitantly patted her closed fist and placed the violin case on her thighs so you could prepare to stand, ringing the bell to announce your stop. She searched your eyes and found nothing but apologies. 

“Playing with you makes me so happy,” you said out of the blue, holding up her stare intently. “You’re really great.”

“I know,” she replied lamely, half-jokingly, “but I like hearing you say it.”

You let out a quiet laugh, the sound weak and breathless. It made her smile nonetheless. 

“You’re gonna be so great, and I’m gonna be great, and we’re gonna be great together. We’ll perform on stage just like we talked about, and in ten years, we’ll be the best in our field.”

“It’ll take me less than ten years. But I’ll wait for you to catch up.”

You gazed at her for the half minute it took for the bus to pull over, searing her playful cockiness into your mind, then you stood and she moved her legs out of the way for you to reach the aisle. 

“Bye, Kafka.”

“See you M…” Her goodbye was interrupted by the soft press of your lips on her cheek, a quick gesture before you rapidly turned away from her and walked out of the bus. “...Monday,” she muttered in confusion. 

She turned to the window as the bus started up again and you waved at her with enthusiasm that felt out of place. Still, she made a disgusted face that made you smile wider, opening her mouth and sticking out her tongue like she was going to puke from the uncharacteristic display of affection. Your figure got smaller and smaller, and she lifted a hand to her cheek to wipe the skin where your lips had been.

The piece is coming to an end. The hardest part has passed and all that is left is a clean finish that Kafka executes perfectly. The final note rings out in the empty room. Her head hangs low for a moment, eyes shut and exhaling slowly through her mouth. She is great and she’ll perform on stage in two weeks. She is not the best, not yet, she’s missing the soothing notes of piano keys to accompany her violin. Kafka chuckles to herself, the irony of this thought is laughable. She smiles, raises her head, and starts the piece from the top. 

[multidimensionalguidance]

What’s coming towards you? PAC

Choose a picture intuitively or the one that you like the most for a tarot message of what might be heading your way soon!

What I’ll cover in these readings:

• What people and/or situations might be heading your way

• Advice/suggestions on how to deal with it

Enjoy!

Pile 1: ace of pentacles, six of wands, and judgement

Major revelations, self-evaluation, and awakenings are heading straight your way. You will be showered with energies that will allow you to have a re-birth, as if your mood has been restored, and the weather is no longer dark clouds all around you. You will be receiving opportunities that will allow your finances or savings to start improving. It might come in the form of a new job, business or investment. At first you might start small or slowly, but surely once your confident and positiveness picks up, you will start getting the taste of victory and success. As small as the opportunity might seem at first, it will allow you to pick up pace and enter a period of complete transformation. You will have meaningful changes that will have you looking back within 6 months and thinking "How did this even happen?". Well, truth is that your own efforts will take you there.

If you've been feeling in a rut financially, just know that those money manifestations or rituals you might have been doing are definitely working. Do not overlook the protentional of this upcoming opportunity, as it might not initially seem like a big deal, but you will definitely reap rewards, recognition, and confidence in yourself. It doesn't matter if it doesn't allow you to achieve long time financial security, the importance lies in how your energy will be transformed afterwards. There's times where all we need is a little push to remind ourselves how deserving of good things and capable of positive transformations we are. Trust yourself and know that the changes that will occuring around you are only pushing you towards the right path. Just remember to stay grounded and not get too cocky or arrogant, as this could cause you more trouble than anything.

Pile 2: the star, ace of cups, and the hierophant

Get ready to receive waves of creativity and inspiration your way. There will be an energy of hope, healing, and serenity in your life coming soon. You will find yourself opening up to the possibilities of new romance, celebrations, and socializing. There will be a contagious feeling of joy and happiness that you will find hard avoiding and/or sharing with others. All of this will lead you towards experiencing relationships that could be set in a strong foundation, or if you're in a relationship there's a good possibility for further commitment to occur. You might also feel interested towards traditional healing methods, and if you do pursue it, there will be an increase in your spirituality and creativity as well. Allow yourself to have genuine faith in the universe and your own abilities to connect with your own intuition. You have plenty of emotional intelligence too, so trust in that no matter the situation, you will be able to handle it in the best way possible. An Aquarius or Taurus with some water in the mix (Cancer, Scorpio, and Pisces) might be wanting to make a serious romantic proposal, so keep an eye on that as well.

The Fool jumped out as well, so I allowed it as an extra card for your reading. This card makes an even bigger emphasis on how you'll be giddy and ready to take that leap of faith that will open doors to obtaining more freedom, adventure, and traveling. The only caution is to make sure you look down before taking that leap, as the fool within its innocence might not consider or plan well enough before making a decision. Stay grounded to avoid idealizing any situation and acting in a somewhat careless manner, specially with all the abundance of joy you'll be feeling. Lay your plans out or share your ideas with someone who is perhaps older and you can trust. If not, then an individual with some good amount of spiritual knowledge to guide you a bit or give the green light. All and all, you will be experiencing good times!

Pile 3: the empress, queen of wands, and page of wands

This reading is giving "I know I'm that b*tch and so does everyone else too!". You will be receiving a really strong and abundant feminine energy your way. Megan Thee Stallion is calling, she wants you to give her the "summer queen" crown back! As soon as I saw this layout I could just tell that soon you'll be feeling unstoppable and fierce. As if there's nothing that you can't manifest and everything just seems to go your way. There will be an increase in your beauty, creativity, and sensuality. Anyone and anything that crosses your path will feel a strong, passionate, sexy, confident, and a bit of a chaotic energy coming from you. All of this could easily lead you to engaging into certain smexy activities, so be extra careful in the upcoming weeks/months if you're not looking forward to a surprise 9 months later. If you are, then fertility will be high and your desires to experience motherhood will be very likely. You will be attracting potential suitors, and all of that could get your mind clouded as to who/where you should be pouring all that energy into. Good news will surely come your way, and you will take on them with a lot of optimism as well. Avoid rushing into anything without getting a good word of advice from someone who's very grounded, because like I said before, you will not only want to burst through doors, but take down the whole wall as well.

You could also meet someone with a lot fire sign energy (Aries, Leo, or Sagittarius) that is definitely younger than you, be it romantic partner or friend. They might be the one carrying all the characteristics mentioned above as well, and end up encouraging you to take on it as well. Expect to have a lot of wild fun with them that will surely leave positive memories, again, just be careful not to do TOO much. Anything and everything in excess is not good, yes, even baddies need to have limits. This will be a very good time to direct all this vibrant feminine energy (regardless of gender) towards creative pursuits because it will make you stand out, attract even more abundance, and good news. If these past months were bleak, then the upcoming weeks/months will make you forget all together of any negative experiences previously encountered.

Pile 4: five of cups, the lovers, and five of pentacles

There's definitely a situation that will be causing you to experience some heavy feelings in the upcoming weeks/months. This could be something you expect or perhaps not at all. A breakup or disconnection from a romantic relationship (official or not) will definitely occur, and I know, this is not what you or anyone would like to read or hear, but if you've been looking for any sort of confirmation then this is the one. It could also be a breakup with a very close friend as well, since the lovers is not just romance, but close partnerships in general. They might have Gemini, Scorpio, or Taurus placements. When situations like these occur, it is normal to experience a big emotional unload. Feelings of sadness, grief, loss, guilt, anger, remorse, and being left out are 100% normal. This is part of the normal human experience, as not everything can be rainbows and sunshine. You need to allow yourself to process all of these emotions with no shame or blame, even if all you might want to do is avoiding them. Ensure that you stick close to your support system and don't feel embarrassed to pour your heart out with them, just trust that this will make the load feel a bit less heavy. Avoid complete isolation, even if this is the only thing you'll want to do. Some battles you must face alone at times, and some others with the help of others. The turmoil will be emotional and financial, hence why you have to ensure that those close to you can step in to aid you.

From experience, I can tell you it is never easy to let go of someone who you bonded really closely to, but clutching tightly into broken pieces will only create more cuts and add further to the pain. You are not your emotions, but the individual who experiences them. Respect the timing that it will take you to overcome this situation, so don't try to speed up or slow down the process. Trust that everything the universe takes from you in the present moment is truly for the best, even if it doesn't make sense to you right now. Both the five of cups and five of pentacles depict a light at the end of the tunnel that we might not be focusing on. Emotionally you'll be feeling low, and this will make you unaware of the doors that are opening right in front of you or all the other good things that are still occuring around you. Financially, you'll be experiencing difficulties but it will only be temporary for help might be right around the corner. You are worthy of joy and good things, even when you're on your lowest. Do not engage into negative self talk or destructive habits (excessive drinking, etc) as this will only harm you further. Feel your feelings and then objectively think of the role you had during the relationship as well. Its not about looking where to put all the blame, but knowing exactly what burdens you should definitely not carry with you.

If for whatever reason this is not about your close relationships, then it might just be a big decision that occurs and leaves you feeling the way I mentioned above. Remember, these cards (five of cups and pentacles) are minor cards, which means that the pain and hardship are temporary. Like Kelly Clarkson said, what doesn't kill makes you stronger! You got this.

DM FOR PERSONAL READINGS 🌸

[ko-existing]

There’s so much misconception or confusion around this whole idea of what we’ll call " " (or Awareness, Being, “THAT”—pick any placeholder, as these are still words). Here’s the paradox: this " " has no shape, no limits, no qualities—yet everything that seems to be is simply arising within it. To call this “XYZ” or even “Awareness” is already one step removed from the simplicity of it. The words are just pointers, hints, not what they point to.

The 'truth' here is both extremely simple, yet complex and infinitely beyond concepts. This isn’t some ultimate checklist to attain or a destination to reach; it’s the immediate recognition of what already is. When we get caught up in ideas of “reaching,” we overlook the reality that this is already complete. No process, no state to reach, no destination to arrive at. Paradoxically, to “see” that nothing’s missing requires absolutely no effort or complexity.

But many misunderstand and say, “If everything’s meaningless, why bother?” But to say “nothing has meaning” is just to say meaning itself is free, not fixed. An apple, for example, can mean “I love apples,” “I don’t like apples,” or it could be just an apple, or it could even be seen without the label of “apple” at all. It’s only the effect of the mind that’s constantly attaching stories and assigning fixed meanings. Realizing the inherent freedom of everything is not negative; it’s liberating for.. no one actually!

A common mistake is this need to pin it all down to one “true” description. But describing the limitless in limited terms will never capture it. Just like an ocean can appear as a wave, but the wave doesn’t “contain” the ocean. The clay can appear as a pot, but the pot doesn’t “contain” the clay’s essence. You can’t capture the formless in any form, nor can you pinpoint " " with any final truth.

A Tibetan saying goes, “You can lead a horse to water, but it has to drink on its own.” We can point to this simplicity, but each person has to see it directly. So if you’re here, seeking rules and steps to follow, that approach won’t apply here. We’re not here to hand you instructions on how to "xyz". This isn’t a thing with techniques or guides. Instead, it’s a direct recognition, beyond all structures, beyond “how-to” or “why.” If you’re expecting someone to hold your hand, you’ll only end up feeling frustrated. This freedom is already yours, and only you can recognize that for yourself.

[gatheringbones]

[“The rage was pure me, my wish to be a sound not an echo, to compose not decompose. It was not against anything, except the entire universe and its laws of unlife. For a night or two I could shine in my own light.

Yet, slowly and softly, a second mood impinged, one that sustained me in a different way: a feeling that life was only truly life insofar as it was not only about me. Like the rage, this mood visited me when I was alone, when I could do little for myself, when my whole sense of motion came from visions in my mind. In this mood I felt myself to be in a cluster of something with other people, tumbling through time. When I tried to draw the feeling in my journal, I came up with an uneven, floating conveyance. It looked a bit like a raft.

A raft can be built over time from bits and pieces. I was a part of a raft, and others were, too; we were floating and jostling together in the same water, sometimes effortlessly, sometimes against the rocks. If my plank fell into the deep, the raft might lose its way or capsize. Some planks of the raft were further from mine, and some were closer. I recited to myself the ways my children’s lives were bound to my own. What mattered was not that I was distinct, but that I was theirs: their father. Every bit of their existence involved the expectation of my presence. They had never not touched me. Their planks had always been bound to mine.

I imagined what would change without me, beginning with the daily details that mark the mental calendar of a parent: soccer practice, math homework, reading out loud. I recognized with pain that my vision of my son without me, of my daughter without me, were just as real as my previous life with them. I watched their future unfold without me, in my mind’s eye, and then I reeled it back.

This floating recognition that my life was not my own, this gentle empathy, escorted me away from death. This sense that life was shared began with my children but extended outwards, an uneven collection of timber making up the raft. I was splashing and tugging forward with everyone I knew and loved, and all would be affected if I fell away now. In this mood I was not raging, but floating along, remembering, contemplating, empathizing.

The rage helped me see myself, helped my body and mind take on distinct form after a shock. The empathy placed me among others. In this mood, it was not so important that I was special. It was important that I was inside other people, in their memories and expectations, a support in the shape of their lives, a buoy during difficult passages. Since my life was not just my own, then my death was not just my own. When I reached that point, I began to rage again. This could not happen.

The empathy, though altogether different from the rage, worked together with it. Each mood revealed a truth, an element of me. Neither was enough; I needed both. I needed the torch and the raft, the fire and the water, the solitude and the solidarity, to get well, to be free. And what is true for me, I suspect, is true for others.”]

timothy snyder, from our malady: lessons in liberty from a hospital diary, 2020

[honoviadakai]

What you favorite Hazbin hotel song says about you 😈🎶😇

(This list includes songs from the pilot as well as a few others that are not official but are near and dear to the fandom's collective heart)

I’m always chasing rainbows 🌈:

…so how’s your relationship with your parents?

You have a good heart but you’re way too hard on yourself

You don’t always have to be busting your ass off, taking breaks is not a crime

Also failing is not the end of the world

I believe in you, please be kinder to yourself

Inside of every demon is a rainbow 🌈 😈:

Golden retriever energy

You are so sweet but so naive

I honestly feel like if this is your fav song, I could spit in your meal and you'd just smile and get a new plate

It's ok to go apeshit

If you did ever get mad I genuinely feel like you'd be absolutely terrifying

But you're such a sweet person, i can't imagine someone pushing you to that point

Inside of every demon is a lost cause/Alastor's reprise 🎶👿:

You're a cynical bastard and you wear that shit like a badge of honor

You're on the same page as Alastor in terms of redemption being impossible/pointless

If this song is your favorite, you laugh at children when they fall over

very loudly

You're the one in your friend group that everyone has to warn about before introducing you to new people

You receive the bombastic side eye so often you smile every time it happens

ADDICT🕸️🚬:

You need a hug

All of the hugs

You're doing your best and I just want you to know I'm proud of you

Vox's Interlude📺🎶:

You like Dubstep

You like Dubstep to a concerning degree

You're also disappointed Vox doesn't have the same voice effect in cannon that he has in the song

You're a Vox simp, but you're really chill about it

Royal Flush🥃♥️♠️♦️♣️:

Hello my fellow Pansexuals and Husk Fans~

If this if your favorite song, you're a Mick Lauer fan and you were sad to hear he wasn't coming back to the official series and it made you even more jaded than you already were(I feel you)

You're also a fan of Johnathan Young and Rock music

You lowkey giggle every time you hear the "every hole is a goal" line

You probably have a sever resting bitch face that scares ppl sometimes, but deep down you're a softy

A jaded softy, but a softy

Radio Play📻🎶:

Hello Alastor fans that lament the recasting of Edward Bosco

Hello Black Gyrph0n fans that think he's not receiving enough recognition

How deep in the financial debt hole are you because of your love of Alastor and new found desire to have a retro 30's aesthetic once this song dropped?

You have good taste in music but I feel like you'd say out of pocket shit on accident

You probably know how to do the Charleston pretty well and that's pretty cool

Redemption arc🙏🎶:

Hello my depressed gifted child burnouts and Elise Lovelock fans

You're a girlboss, you really are, but I need you to take more breaks and drink more water

You strike me as someone who takes the phrase "act your wage" as a suggestion at best

If over thinking was an Olympic sport, you'd win gold, silver ans bronze

stop trying to carrying other people's baggage on top of your own, that's not building character, its building more work for your therapist

Assuming you've even allowed yourself to see one!

Insane🦌🔪:

You're unhinged

like Niffty levels unhinged

but you have good taste in music

You're also a very vocal Alastor fan

You need to be watched 24/7 because you strike me as someone who'd commit war crimes for fun

Eyes on me📺🥲:

You like Techno a normal amount

you're probably a Bo Burnham fan

You also give the vibe that you like anime like Evangalion

as well as the vibe of hiding behind a chill facade even though you're kinda depressed

you also give the impression that you're into enemies to lovers and once sided pining in romance

You ship Vox x Alastor in a wholesome way and you're foaming at the mouth for their backstory

You hate Val(as you should)

Change the order 👑🪽:

You lament that Lucifer doesn't have a British accent

You HEAVILY lament Lucifer not being a heartless asshole

You oh so desperately wanna see Lucifer and Lilith in their prime/as a united power couple

You have slight daddy issues

You're also probably someone who grew up with some religious trauma

You're in your villain arc but it's mostly yo protect yourself

i highly suggest getting a dog, a rubber duck collection and a therapist

Get hooked🚬🦋:

Your search history is not suitable for human eyes

You definitely have daddy issues

You desperately wanna see Val on the poles

You're fun at partied but you cannot be left unsupervised under any circumstances

You radiate bad bitch energy but I feel like you'd apologize to a kindly janitor if you had to walk on a floor they just finished mopping

You can run in heels and I respect that immensely

Smile like you mean it😁🦌:

I get it! You love Alastor! Please lower your voice a tad friend!

It's concerning how quick you'd sell your soul to this man

You like jazz unironically(nice)

You wanna experience one of Al's radio shows

...I'm not entirely sure if you wanna hear it or be the victim...and that deeply concerns me

Use me up🕷️🥲:

You wanna see Angle Dust fuck shit up(same)

You don't make friends easily but you're the loyalest son of a bitch anyone could ever have and more people need to recognize that

You probably had a really rough childhood

You give ppl middle fingers and sass the way Oprah gave out cars back in the day

You just want a hug, someone to say they're proud of you(I'm proud of you friend) and a month long nap

We're sure to drown🐈‍⬛🥃🥺:

Hello again my fellow Pansexuals and Husk fans

Specifically the ones with severe depression, trust issues and think mixing Tequila and monster energy drinks will help with the abandonment issues

yeah, i see you, put the bottle down mf

get therapy, this a threat

You're so cynical that even shadow the hedgehog would ask if you're ok

asking for help doesn't make you weak fam, i get where your coming from but you need a good plucking you prickly cactus

oddly enough, you give the best advice to the few friends you keep in your circle but take none of your own advice

You listen to country rock with lyrics so sad that everyone in the car with you immediately get concerned

definitely a cat person

POP!👁️💥:

You either wanna be stepped on or do the stepping on

You probably watched Black Lagoon and loved Revy

If you don't know what I'm talking about, look her up, that's your type

Low key probably a pyromaniac

You're that one friend that's ALWAYS ready to punch your friend's ex's in the face

Honestly, I feel like you're scrappy enough to fist fight god with the confidence of someone who thinks they have a shot at winning

My machine 🐍 ⚙️:

You were really excited to see Pentious be one of the show's antagonists

You're still a little bitter about not getting your mad scientist, steam punk, snake man

You did love his War General outfit though

You probably really like shows like Arcane

You really wanted 'Enemies to lovers' CherriSnake or platonic/rivals CherriSnake

You probably have reptile as a pet

most likely a snake

Happy day in hell🎶🎤:

You're a basic Broadway bitch but your optimism is a tad infectious so I'll let it slide

You're a tad too optimistic though

Like, to a concerning degree

Someone could punch you and you'd ask them if they were ok despite having a split lip

you're definitely a workaholic

take that PTO sweetie, work will be there when you come back

Hell is forever😇😈:

you either really like Alex Brightman or you LOVE villains

you also love rock

You kicked your feet like a love sick when Adam did the guitar solo bit

Probably a fan of bands like Skillet

You have religious trauma but your coping mechanism is to crack jokes about it

some of them are probably inappropriate

Stayed gone📺🦌:

You ship Vox x Alastor a "normal" amount

You'd sell your soul for Vox and Al to have more duets together

You're probably a Vox simp

If you're not, its cuz you're an Al simp

You giggled at "That's the tea"

You also drooled at Al's demon form towards the end of the song

It starts with sorry🐍🥹:

friend, you are way too forgiving

someone could steal your life's savings and I feel like you'd just let them have it because "they probably need it more"

You were very proud of Pentious

Respectless💅📱:

You radiate chihuahua energy

You are 5'2 or smaller and 90 lbs soaking wet

someone need to make sure you don't run these streets lawless

don't get me wrong

You are absolutely a bad bitch that serves cunt like a 5 star restaurant serves gourmet steak

but you're gonna say the wrong thing to the wrong person one day

you cannot afford to fuck around and find out when they're over 5'9 my friend, sit down please

Whatever it takes🦋🩰:

you're the eldest child of your family aren't you

You don't need to prioritize everyone before yourself!

Love yourself first damn it!

You probably like Milfs or goths

You also probably wish Zestial had more songs

I have a feeling your favorite Disney movie is Encanto...

Poison🚬🕷️🥺:

Holy fuck you need a hug

You're either a survivor of some kind or life has just been kicking you in the balls for no god damn reason

Come here, I'm adopting you and making sure you're actually happy

You're low key an amazing dancer

literally one of the best people to be friends with

Loser Baby🐈‍⬛🕷️:

hello my fellow queers, Keith David fans, Blake Roman fans and Huskerdust shippers

You are a connoisseur of slow burn romance

You're probably a depressed hopeless romantic

friend, if you want the Husker to your dust...the loser to your baby...you gotta talk to people...

go touch grass

you're that one friend who bullies your bestie but that's cuz that your guy's love language

If anyone messed with your bestie, you'd fight that person to the death the way Husk and Angel did to those loan sharks

Hell's greatest dad🪽🦌:

You either beef with ppl for fun or you're a very flamboyant theater kid

Its probably both tbh

You probably fell in love with the blonde short king after this song

You ship Radioapple

you want a sitcom ft Radioapple and you'd sell your soul to get it

Your fav Disney movie is probably Aladdin

You totally play "HaHA! Fuck you..." on repeat

More than anything🪽😭:

So how's your relationship with your dad...

You cried so hard to this song that it scared you

grab the tissues, get your coziest blanket and go get your favorite treat

and some therapy

Welcome to Heaven😇🎶:

Emily is your favorite character

Your gaydar was going off when St. Peter started existing

Your a chill person

A little too chill though…

You might still be an active member of your community

Ya might wanna consider reducing your hours, there is such a thing as too much loyalty

Treat yourself to a vacation

You didn't know😧🪽:

Hello fellow black sheep of the family with severe religious trauma

You freaked the fuck out when the “If Hell is forever then Heaven must be a lie” line dropped

You felt so vindicated after this song and honestly, same

You LOVED Emily by the end of this song

Out for love 💗 🩰:

You like MILFs

You want Carmilla to kick/step on you

You’re either a magical girl fan, a fan of Latin music or both

You cheered so hard for Vaggie at the end you definitely got a noise complaint 🤣

Ready for this🎤⚔️:

You have anxiety

Your favorite character is probably Charlie

Your favorite movie is probably Marry Poppins or something in the same time period/genre

You’ve dealt with Karen’s before and watching Susan become tolerable was so satisfying for you

You want Alastor and Rosie to adopt you

More than anything(reprise):

You're the poster child of sappy hopeless romantics

You cried a little from joy here

You’re definitely not straight

You want this moment, go get yourself a Vaggie cuz you’re definitely gonna be the Charlie of the relationship

Finale🎶🎆:

You're the ultimate theater kid

This song hit all the sweet spots in your depressed brain for you

Let’s be honest, your favorite part of the song was either the Vees or Alastor

It’d your favorite part was with the Vees, your a huge chaos gremlin

You cannot be trusted with information but you’re very fun at parties

If your favorite part was Alastor’s part, get therapy

If you related to that part on a spiritual level, you mask so hard I’d believe you if you said you were born wearing a mask

[wulvercazz]

🌊Mesmerizing Views🪸

Some more exploring of Luna-Aqua for Thirteen and friens uwu💕See the previous part here~

There’s a moment where no word is said, but all three seem to come to an agreement that tired laughter is exactly the correct response to what’s just happened. Their breathings’ evening out as Tortuga gets them closer and closer to their destination, straightening up and putting themselves together– just enough to look decent; In case of passerbys, of course. And there’s a point where Atticus seems to struggle getting something off his mind, until he stumbles into a: “need help— cleaning up?” He says rather quietly, and Thirteen is almost confused about the question until they remember; right, Atticus made a cummy mess of them, didn’t he…?

“I have a feeling we’re going to get messier later–” They answer, rather undisturbed, just as Marina’s reigning Tortuga closer to the waves, and giving him a quick command to help them off his back.

Thirteen has the pleasure of watching Atticus’s face glow somewhere near purple in the face as they get off and into the damp sand. Marina’s laughter ever-present when it came to him. “They could be right you know-” she wraps her arms around his waist as soon as he stands tall on the sand beside them, sneaking her hands down to his ass and pecking him lightly in his rather hot cheek, before she lets go. (But not before giving the base of his tail a teasing stroke, Thirteen is happy to avert their eyes at that; despite everything, that seems too private.)

“No one’s here much at all.” Marina announces finally, “It’s our favorite spot for foraging for… pretty much everything Luna-aquua’s ocean has to offer.” Thirteen’s eyes widen in curiosity as Marina and Atticus show them around; pointing out structures far into the distance, mountains and islands, and close where the rocks create small pools where life gathers.

Beyond what Thirteen’s come to very quickly learn about Atticus, the guy sure knows how to talk when it comes to marine life. Pointing out to them his finds and explaining to Thirteen the species the dead shells came from, picking them up and showing them in detail like a teacher, Marina even straying away and coming back with more to further entice her boyfriend to chat about sea snails and clams and crabs.

“And this–” and he hands Thirteen a small, spiky and striped empty snail shell, “Is from a glowing reef snail; they can grow quite big and live very long, they glow when they’re alive too- hence the name, of course, it’s rather charming. And… I’m not sure about the veracity of it, so don’t take my word for it, but I’ve heard that there’s a way for properly cooking and eating one of these that will give the user a limited time to breathe underwater like a fish. It could also just be deadly poisonous, but… that’s the legend, at least.” Atticus chuckles at his own story, and Thirteen tries to remember all his words, you never know when one might need this sort of knowledge, but ultimately; what captivates them is the way his smile grows wider the more he has to teach. And Marina clearly knows him all to well as she stands close, just as captivated despite clearly having heard these stories several times before.

“Ah! Let’s show Thirteen the reef–” she bursts out suddenly, making Atticus’s tail puff up for a second before recognition had it placating on its own. Marina has them all strip down to their underwear, lest they have to get back with sopping wet clothes, and walk into the water with Tortuga; who’s hard to get back up on with how much excitement’s oozing out of him once water is mentioned.

Marina’s removed his tack and placed it all secure on a rock along their clothes, so it gets a little harder to hold on once his slow trotting becomes excited floating and then vivacious swimming; but soon they’re far in enough that the ocean floor’s painted with reef colors and fast fish swimming by.

“Lets go~!” is all Marina bothers to say next before she’s jumping off into the water, and before Thirteen has any time to ask, Atticus has quietly disappeared too. No time to doubt.

They jump into the water right after, immediately followed by Tortuga diving in past them to join his Master in her fun. Thirteen squints their eyes and has to remember not to gasp themself out of breath; the view from above has nothing on this. There’s coral and sponge and sea anemones of every color, some glowing in an othernatural brightness when the shadows cover them just right.

Marina and Atticus look even more at home right in that moment; moving naturally through the sea foliage and blending right in with the fauna that’s decided they’re okay to swim carelessly around. Thirteen still can’t decide what to do with themself, as they turn in every direction.

Then Marina points at something else for them to look, and Thirteen is ripped away by their own sick need to breathe. Rushing up for a gasp of air before diving back in. Marina’s quick to hide her concern, but struggles not to look a little guilty– like she forgot how Thirteen’s different from them.

It’s fine– Thirteen wishes that magical dish was real right then, hopes it comes a time that they can do something like that as they try not to pout every time they need an oxygen break. About eight of them for every one of Atticus, twenty for one of Marina’s.

They are jealous, alright?

Despite any obstacles, Marina and Atticus show them around just like they did above; pointing at beautiful color-changing fish, at pointy creatures hidden between rocks and at the seafruit Marina liked best. Picking a few for them to eat together during breaks only to dive back to the fun.

And almost as impressive as the scenery was, was Marina pulling of her thick arm bracelet to unfold into a makeshift bag made of thin mesh. Gesturing with excitement at them and showing them they could now carry their finds… Thirteen makes a note to ask her about this secret pouch later, they simply ought to get something like it for their next travels.

Slowly, Marina’s net is filled with seafruit, edible crabs for tomorrow that Atticus is kind enough to give a quick end to, and a few more curious finds; more empty seashells and shiny rocks that Marina promises she’ll turn into jewelry for all of them and what Thirteen believes to be some sort of sharp spearhead– made of a hard iridescent material that has all three perplexed and fascinated.

Marina also takes some time to hunt fish for the bearsharks along Tortuga, holding onto his fin to flow along his movements and work together to herd the fish while she traps them. Truly mesmerizing.

Atticus shows them a few more neat finds while Marina busies herself, guides them to catch the delicate grace of the long horse eel, and excitedly points at what looks like the dead glowing reef snail he showed them on the shore; but very much alive. Thirteen is as enchanted by it’s lively colors, it’s large size- like Atticus promised- as the cat seems to be about his girlfriend’s prowess.

They’re perhaps poking a bit too much, but when Atticus and them reach back up to the surface to rest on one of the higher rocks among the reef Thirteen has to ask further about him. Not surprisingly, he’s got advanced studies thanks to his adoptive parents, has a strong interest on marine biology and feels “, perhaps, a bit isolated from the rest of the town.”

“They adopted me somewhere far from here, unsure of what I am… and their obvious wealth doesn’t help the situation along either…” Atticus mutters quietly as they wait, but Thirteen has no time to feel sorry when his eyes are so softened by the sight of Marina still working hard.

“You really love her,” Thirteen muses out loud, and Atticus’s face goes through all five stages of embarrassed grief before settling on bashful acceptance.

“Yeah…” he finally agrees, softly. Thirteen tries not to smile too much, to avoid spooking him out of this mellow happiness. “She’s always liked who I was, even before we started dating, never made me feel different.” He reasons, and Thirteen has to heavily agree on his last statement.

“... Can I tell you something?” He asks into the air, and doesn’t wait for an answer. “I want to ask Marina to marry me…”

Thirteen is not sure why this keeps happening, keeps meeting people willing to open their hearts in ways they’re not sure how to react to– but they wouldn’t have it any other way, honestly. Their eyes widening as they listen in on their secret, sure of the emotional weight it holds despite words evading them.

“I don’t have anything prepared at all… but… I think about it often.” And then the look sours and Thirteen’s worried their lackluster appeasing skills won’t be enough to get Marina’s boyfriend back to good shape before she comes back. “I don’t believe her father likes me though.”

… Yikes. Thirteen’s really not sure what to say to that.

“I don’t think I’m the type he’d approve of to inherit his legacy… even if only as Marina’s support.” He laughs to himself, wincing when it’s clear he’s shared much more than he ever intended to.

“... As much as she loves her family, Marina really doesn’t seem the type to care about who approves,” Thirteen improvises. Relief washing over them when it cracks Atticus up into a barely held-back grin.

“You’re correct,” and the smile’s back in full force, glancing at Thirteen gratefully before he gets lost on Marina and her trusty companion making their way back up from the depths.

“I’m starving~!” Marina exclaims as soon as Tortuga breaks the water, their loot secure in her hands like a trophy. “Mom packed leftovers for us.” She sing-songs, the evening resuming to the carefree fun from before as everyone hangs back on Tortuga to take them to the shore.

“- the sun sets and the sky takes these bright colors that you don’t see anywhere else,” Marina explains between bites.

“The name of the town comes exactly from that instance that the sun hides behind the horizon– the sky gradually gives it’s glow, and in a way, it appears to bleed into the water,” Atticus joins in, eating along like they’re telling the story in the same breath.

“But it’s really that without sunlight, all the light form the coral and the fish shine through, so it looks like the moon is really shining from below.” Marina finishes with a proud little smile, both enjoying the way Thirteen listens intently with ever widening eyes and gaping mouth.

“We’ll have to walk back into the beach later– so you can see it,” Marina joins in on the excitement. “Words can’t truly hold to the actual view.”

“Mmh,” Atticus attempts to agree through a mouthful, “there’s really nothing like it.”

Thirteen eats a little faster, as if that could bring the end of the day a little sooner.

[fleet-off]

fic authors self rec! when you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. spread the self-love~<333333

Thank you for the ask, Yujeong! This took me a while to answer (I overthought the answers, as is my wont 😅), but it was so much fun.

A Close Shave

If running the razor down the side of Pete’s face felt intimate, the slick slide of blade against throat is something primal. Blood sings close to the surface, jugular an endless welling up, carotid a violent burst underneath. Drowning could not ease the pulse that sears through Vegas’s mind at the image—he suspects only one thing could. He could flick his wrist and end this. (He could nuzzle his face into the hollow of Pete’s neck and end this.)

In the safehouse, on the cusp of a transformation he cannot yet comprehend, Vegas shaves Pete’s face. Also a meditation on immolation and drowning. I struggle to compliment my own writing, but I think this fic has some of the best lines I’ve ever written. @sunshinesanctuary Dav did some devastating art for it, which made me cry heavily at the time and again whenever I think about it too hard (why are artists magic??).

a temporary abundance

Life used to be the means to a messy end, bodies tools given in service to a name larger than either of them. They are still learning what it means to live for living’s sake, to be made of flesh and openly want for all the things living flesh wants. It hurts because it matters. Such is living, and there is joy in being alive.

This little fic is more image than story—a golden moment of rest, Pete’s head in Vegas’s lap, and the recognition that the impermanence of stability makes it all the more precious. a temporary abundance was my first VP fic, and it has received some of my very favorite comments. It was how I met @theflowergirl Lily and my first interaction with @lu-sn lu.

Lapping at the Edges

There’s a kind of self-disgust you can find satisfaction in, narrow as the space between indignant inhale and resigned exhale. Ba, calling him a whore. The routine Vegas has straddled either side of: men much older than him, hungry for a taste of power, smiling through gritted teeth and sinking to their knees. His own knees, falling open as the world splits down its middle. Pete, frozen in the aftermath of a verbal blow. Inhale. Exhale.

Lapping at the Edges tormented me for ages—my evening of “drunk Vegas talks shit, asks to get hit” nonsense took two years to write after I trapped myself in an endless cycle of rewrites for chapter three. But ultimately, the struggle arose from my love for this story and the need to finish it right. I hope those who stuck around were satisfied by the ending. ❤️

won’t give up these ghosts

“Tell me what it’s like on the beach at night,” Vegas murmured as his head fell back onto Pete’s thighs. His mouth was a dark stain; his eyes were raptor-like. Pete caressed his head, searching for breath and words. “It’s like being the only stillness in the world,” he said at last. “The wet sand digs into your feet, and the sea is this massive moving thing you’re not a part of, and all you can see is water and sky and dark. And it sees you, but there’s nothing there to see of you. You’re safe. You’re—a void.”

All of my stories are in some sense about learning to live, but I suspect that message comes through clearest in this story, where Pete feigns death for the purpose of (nonsexual) funeral/body disposal roleplay. I love the contrast—lingering on death as an expression of the desire for life. (And Yujeong, I still often return to your comment on this one on hard days—it meant an awful lot to me.)

Passing Time

There are moments—too many, lately—when the tenderness presses heavy at the back of Vegas’s throat. Pete sits bright-eyed and pink-eared a mere breath away; he’s here, real and taking up space and confoundingly Pete and all, and when Vegas blinks he somehow continues to be. The weight of him dents his side of the couch and distorts the reindeer face on one of the Christmas-themed throw pillows.

It is a month—two, five, eight—since the world broke open and was remade in the shapes of what love is, and Vegas and Pete are still learning to live around the cracks. Writing in this kind of time-bound framework was a new challenge for me pacing-wise, and I think the result has some really lovely moments and lines. I wrote this fic as part of the 2023 KinnPorsche Big Bang, and was so fortunate to be paired with @kiiyuq yu, whose art for the piece is frankly the sort of thing that topples cities.

[zombiecicada]

That was… not how they wanted their first mission to go.

They could already hear Enmity taunting them for being unsuccessful at such a simple task. There was nothing more simple than finding and killing the saviour of the universe. They had nobody to blame but themself and their morals.

No amount of debriefing or training prepared them for some wimpy runt blowing up like a hydrogen bomb.

If it was not for the horrifying amount of embarrassment flooding through its body that far rivalled any pain they felt, they might’ve considered telling Doctor Cruce they needed a raise when they got back.

….

Were they….even getting paid at all?

…

…

…

Better yet, where were they?

It finally pried its eyes open. Pain in their eyes wasn’t anything abnormal. They supposed, cynically, that they could add ‘pain from being blown up’ to their roster of different experienced painful sensations.

The pain was quickly forgotten as its surroundings came into place, a void… but this one was different. It wasn’t white. It was a mix of blues and dark purples, massive glowing shards of some glassy material floating around with them.

And then the equally as massive eyes blindly fixated upon them.

Rem bit back a sharp gasp, spinning helplessly in the spot as gravity seemed to be nonexistent. The massive beast merely listened to the faint sounds of the small sefortian struggle, the massive rune dotted tendrils making up almost a mane around the head of the beast slowly weaving like black waves.

Perhaps it was the realization that struggle was futile, or the final onset of recognition. It stopped struggling.

“You’re a riftwrath. A demonbeast.” They uttered out. “I thought- all of your kind were bested in the war.”

Maybe this was an ally..?

Rem was suddenly overcome with the weirdest, most awful sensation they had ever felt in their entire life, every finger going stiff, their wings clenching, their tail going rigged.

Their mouth moving all on its own, like their body being puppeteered, as their own voice spoke back to them.

“Is that what Nightmare said? That my kind was ‘bested’, as if we were not some spite at life, machines built to participate in a war not our own? We were bested, not slaughtered as we fought a doomed battle against the brightest celestial?”

The force let go of Rem’s limbs, they shook and gasped and tried not to heave, clutching their chest as they realized autonomy had been returned to the body that seconds ago had been controlled and used to speak, all while their mind was helplessly aware.

“…….. what.” Rem choked out, a scream of protest being silenced as the force once again grabbed it.

“Nightmare left me to rot for failing to be a useful pawn in his game. You are simply his next pawn in this war. When your duty complete, succeed or fail, this board will be wiped and his pawns replaced, you need escape while there is still a chance to do so.”

Rem gasped a little less when they were let go this time, eyes stinging fiercely as orange tinted tears bubbled up around the corners of its eyes.

“Nngn.. hhhnn…” Rem panted, they needed to get out of here. Their paws clenched, electricity running throughout their feathers. Their tail twisted attempting to right themself, if this was even right side up.

“Let me out of here,” it demanded, the demonbeast looming over them like a black mountain didn’t grab them again, and Rem swallowed back saliva and bared their teeth. “Let. Me. OUT.”

They shot a bolt of electricity at the monster, the monster shook his head a bit as if he was shaking off stubborn water droplets, before flicking Rem like it was nothing more than a pesky bug.

Their eyes slammed shut just before the limb hit them, and like waking from a dream where you fell to your death, just before the impact they were awake again, stumbling upwards. Their wings and tail slammed by the return of gravity, their chest aching from the sharp inhales.

Back in the void. The first one. The weird white one. Completely alone.

….

……

Maybe they’d lay down for just a minute. Not to think about the horrifying words that they- he-

No. It … just needed to rest for a minute and then get back to work. Shut up, do their job, and as long as they did that, everything would be fine.

[sunnylolli]

I came across your punk Arthur dad au where Al was having a bad day and I'd be really interested to know your headcanons of punk Arthur as a dad if you have any. I cant remember if that art came from a human au or not but I vibe so hard with the idea of human punk Arthur just raising his kid y'know? btw I wanna eat your art style its so good

Boy do I ever!!!

It is indeed a human au and it does have FrUk, but I focus more on Arthur and Alfred as their own little family-

Arthur is a young single dad. And I mean he's young as in he's just shy of 18 when Alfred is born and he's just turned 19 when Alfred is made his sole responsability.

Arthur needs to stop doing gigs and needs to put a pin in his entire social life because most of his 'friends' are really only friends with him because they go out drinking together and go to concerts, y'know?So by withdrawing from that for Alfred's sake, Arthur kind of ends up only really having Gilbert around, because Gilbert isn't really that easy a person to get rid of.

(Putting a read more because I go nuts beneath here, it seems)

- Arthur as a punk dad would obviously end up having a very different grown up Alfred than we got in canon- A very left leaning Alfred.

But I see him bringing Alfred to things still, but he doesn't bring him to places with too many people or music that is way too loud because 1. he's worried someone will come snatch Alfred from him and 2. he doesn't want to ruin his hearing.

He brings him to protests though, with earbuds. And 1970s Britain, it's not like those are lacking in any capacity. So we have Alfred sitting on Arthur's shoulders in a way too large band t-shirt, his hair messed up and having the time of his life in the sea of people protesting worker's rights.

And then he'll leave Alfred with Gilbert a few hours every day while he runs around trying to find a job! Which he eventually does and starts gradually making an attempt to make a savings fund for Alfred.

But it doesn't change the fact they're poor.

But they live in a flat, they own a vacuum and a kitchen, they have running water and they eat doner kebab at least a few times a month. And when Alfred starts school, Arthur starts uni in hopes of getting himself a more well-paying job, Alfred and Matthew get the same uniform as everybody else does.

So yeah, they're poor, but it could definitely be worse.

Arthur doesn't push ideology on either Alfred nor Matthew (When he enters into the picture), he doesn't tell them what to think, but he expresses his own beliefs and asks them things that can get them to think for themselves such as:

"If you were in their shoes, how would you feel about [x,y,z.]." And "Alright, then how would you like [xyz] to be different?"

Like he's very democratic in his parenting and he believes very firmly that good people aren't born, they're made. And while he doesn't have many expectations set in stone for either of them, he does expect them to do their best at things that they like doing and he does expect them to be good people.

Arthur is genuinely interested in who Al and Mat will grow up to be, the scene where he lies on the floor with Alfred is a reflection of that, in how he speaks to Alfred like a person rather than to a child-

(Because when soeaking to children it's important to remember they are just as much a person deserving of respect and recognition as any other person is and they do not owe you shit just because they happen to be a child. They do not owe you respect, if you cannot show them any.)

And also! In this au, Arthur simply is a good dad; Because I have started studying and I love projecting things I learn onto him and have him utilize my knowledge.

Punk Dad Arthur is the healthiest Arthur that exists within the Sunny sphere.