#but fuuuuuuuuuck that guy

[gommyworm]

:^[

[ghostzzy]

oh good. i just puked my brains up.

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

"Well of course, if someone doesn't have documentation from the state we just let them die and drown and starve and freeze on the mountain because they sure don't deserve disaster relief!" - signed, the pro-human dignity and anti-environmental racism party

[lwieserce]

wdym he needs those materials from aquatic animals..... don't piss me off

[annabelle-o-belmont]

Being a gm kinda sucks sometimes, cause like you get to embody different kinds of characters so you can go from like:

an old mouse with a thrown out back and his kindly old wife as they discipline their adoptive son

to

a single bat mum that feels like absolute shit because she’s raising 3 kids all by herself and is terrified of losing anyone else or feeling like a burden on her community.

to

a lizard father who doesn’t properly know how to express his emotions so sometimes he comes off a little distant but internally he cares so deeply for his son

to

a crow mum who immigrated and is new to this community because she wanted to give her child a life free from food scarcity and toxicity and wants nothing more than to blend in and be helpful.

all this to say, i am indeed crying, gming is hard and no one should ever do it (/j)

[trashbaget]

.

[boffinsandbeasties]

lmao my NY replacement just quit via TEXT what is my life about to look like

[punkitt-is-here]

i find it really funny that im a girl now but whenever im into a guy i still think "fuuuuuuuuuck dude im fucking gayyyyyyyyyyyy" internally. like actually that's the completely expected response. not gay at all. or so i thought. as it turns out its still gay as fuck to be into dudes as a transgender woman

[mzcain27]

Somebody should take my phone I’m gonna be nasty

[yo9urt]

today i return to the sea

[covenofthearticulate]

HOLY FUCK THIS GAME IS SO MUCH MORE EXCITING THAN I EVER EXPECTED

well in a fun turn of events i guess i’m psychic ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

okay I’m being sooooo unserious LMAO but in my latest fic, Home Court Advantage, the whole premise of course is that Louis and Daniel go to watch a game.

It just so happens that Warriors are, in fact, playing tonight, on Valentine’s day. So when writing the fic, I kind of just had to make shit up because obviously the game hadn’t happened yet…

but one of the things I wrote about was one of the star shooters getting injured off of a jump shot in the second half of the game.

and ANYWAY i’m watching the actual game right now live, and Draymond Green just got fucked up coming off of a jump shot and was escorted off the court 😬

[elizart5]

Going to court… Yay

Adam: wait, you never got to meet the Seraphims?

Lute: Nope, I wasn’t here long enough

Adam: you’re a lucky Bitch, the head Seraphim sucks ass

Lilith: The trial shall begin

Adam: FUUUUUUUUUCK…. My ex wife…

Lute: were you married to the head Seraphim?

Adam: no

Lute: is that the head?

Adam: no

Lute: Her?

Adam: nope

Lute: Her?

Adam: Just shut up and wait!

*Lucifer Enters*

Lucifer: And I felt bad because I put my foot down

Lucifer: I said “NO”, like a good dad

Lute: who is this? Can we get this guy out of here so we can start?

Adam: SHHHHH! Shut up and show some respect for the Bitch!

Lucifer: …

Lucifer: Adam…. And your girlfriend… yay…

[octuscle]

Lord, all I want is to turn my roommate into a hot biker my age, around 18/20 years old…. My current roommate is just a nerd, showers everyday, and is too clean. I want a goofy, dumb biker boy roommate please!

Your roommate really is a pain in the ass. He's constantly lecturing you about some astronomy shit that you're really not interested in. He plays video chess with some friends who live in the middle of nowhere and talks to them in Klingon. Everything about him annoys you. The noises he makes when he breathes. The way he brushes his teeth. His quirk of always wearing funny colored socks. Yes, he's probably a genius. He's only 16, has no hair on his sack yet, but is already a sophomore in college. But that doesn't change anything. He's unbearable!

The first thing you notice is his language… His nasal British English becomes harsher, his language simpler and simpler. And you could swear there's an accent mixed in… Something funny. Russian? He's probably learning a new language in his spare time now. You could puke!

"Sup, comrade?" he greets you as he arrives home very late by his standards. You look at him questioningly. "Hey man, I come driving school. You always say that you're half man without driver's license." You never said that. You didn't even know he didn't have a driver's license. You smile painfully. And go back to your Playstation. Your flatmate lies on the bed with his shoes on and reads a car magazine that he has obviously picked up at driving school. Boy, he's really off the wall today.

You are woken up the next morning by your flatmate. He comes in the door in a sweat. "That was good training. You have come with me tomorrow" he grunts. Damn, the Slavic accent seems natural and not at all fake. Maybe it's always been his language and the British accent was artificial… Your flatmate sprays a little Axe under his arms, gets dressed and disappears. "Driving school" he mumbles on the way out. What he does, he does consistently. But it's never happened that he leaves without making his bed and tidying his gym clothes. Okay, he's never been to the gym before.

When he comes home in the evening, he's talking loudly on the phone. I have no idea what language that is… Russian? Could also be Bulgarian, Serbian or something else. In any case, his squeaky voice has given way to a pretty impressive barition. Without greeting you, he throws his heavy leather jacket and helmet on the bed and goes into the bathroom, continuing to talk on the phone. His baritone gives way to a groan, followed by a loud "Fuuuuuuuuuck". He comes out of the bathroom grinning, stows his cock away and asks if you've cum today. Otherwise he would suck you off. You decline with thanks. And regret it just a few minutes later.

It's 06:00 when your roommate's alarm clock rings. Has he been sleeping naked? In any case, he goes to the bathroom naked. A few minutes later you hear him wanking again. You don't hear him showering. But when you see him coming out of the bathroom, still naked, you see his semi-hard cock. And it's impressive. Maybe you should ask him today if you can suck him off. You ask why he's up so early. He answers. "I got new job. And I want pump first. Will come with me?" "Maybe tomorrow," you reply and close your eyes again. Half asleep, you notice your flatmate putting on a boiler suit and heavy work boots. A leather jacket on top. He picks up his rucksack and helmet and noisily leaves your room.

The guy who comes into your room in the evening is not your flatmate. At least not at first glance. He notices your questioning look. "I cut hair. More handy with helmet. Like it?" He kneads his impressive bulge. He smells of sweat, leather and engine oil. You get a hard-on and fall to your knees.

Your flatmate is actually more of a lone Slavic wolf. He doesn't make a big deal out of it. He loves his bike, he loves his job as a mechanic and he loves pumping iron. Pretty much in that order. But sometimes he needs a pillion. Someone to suck his cheesy uncut cock. And you love that job.

Slika pronađena @zakucavanje

[anonymouspuzzler]

stream today is delayed slightly because my DRIVER needed to UPDATE APPARENTLY!!!!!! FUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!! ok see you guys soon

[trashbaget]

.

[aspiringwarriorlibrarian]

https://x.com/HannaBarberaCap/status/1827781603818356949

Fuuuuuuuuuck this guy!

“I never saw them as racial” yeah that’s because you were young and hadn’t become racist yet. Then you grew up, became racist, and when faced with the contradiction of your beloved childhood characters not living up to your new personality where every person of color was an invasion, immediately started grasping at straws to explain why it’s okay for these brown characters to exist but not the new ones.