#but fuuuuuuck i miss that feeling so fucking much

[charonte-simi]

.

[jaythelay]

If someone forgives your own incomprehensible actions, the way to repay is to do the same for another. Only then will you forgive yourself.

If a kindness was not given that felt inherently required, the way to get passed that is to give kindness when you'd believe it inherently required.

Seriously you can get over A Lot of your early life by being what wasn't there. Because the issue was There's A Problem, and it was Never Resolved.

You can be that, as silly as that has always sounded, there really is no feeling like being able to Be The One to Do The Right Thing THIS FUCKING TIME.

It means something now. That wasn't Just a Loss, it was Growth, that YOU GREW YOURSELF, instead of letting be demolished, and best of all? Ya Did It For Someone Else! It's no longer a "what-if" of kindness but a reality That Can Happen, and it may happen through them now!

I can't put into enough words, your unblinking kindness will be taken advantage of, but my god, you're just right, seriously, every fucking time. Don't let hurt make you painful, exist in the pain, and stop it from happening to others, if you forget it, you won't be there for them, but that doesn't mean 'let it eat away at you', it means to be prepared for them.

Strongly However, go with your gut, 100% of the time even if you haven't acknowledged it yet, if you're slightly not confident, be kind, but protect yourself, don't let others take from what you've kept this long in your life. You come first, but that might entail doing good for others because that's who you are. Just protect yourself.

Protect what you got, what you are, go with your gut and not your heart, it had more time to think before reaching the brain.

[lalacliffthorne]

🤍 just a one time thing 🤍

modern!Cassian x Reader

summary: add together best friends and a drunk slip up and you got a massive load of chaotic feelings.

part I

notes: well - so much for next week? life just - majorly got in the way. anyway.

fuuuuuuck I can't. 😭💞 this has been long overdue, bc honestly - Cassian just has my whole fucking heart, and this modern version reduces me to a pile of giggling, feet-kicking mush. I've had this idea for a while now, along with some impeccable inspiration - and it's finally coming together. this one's got smut (duh), flirting and friendship (and a whole lot of f-bombs on Cassian's side) -- and, which seems to be business at usual for me at this point - it got insanely long. in fact, it got so long that I had to scratch posting it in one part, cause I think that would have brought tumblr down, like - really. *winces* so, this is part one, somewhere around 20k words (oh boy) -- you know the drill; get cozy, get comfortable, you're gonna be here for a while.

______________________________________________________________

The library was my favorite place on campus.

Even though it was way too small for so many students and had way too little workspace, which meant it was chronically stuffed with people, there was just something calming about the absolute silence you entered once you walked through the front doors. And I had quickly realised that if you slipped into one of the lesser frequented sections, moving through the aisles all the way to the back where the tilted roof was glass and everything was completely quiet, you could actually pretend you were alone, just surrounded by hundreds and hundred of books, not another soul around.

Which meant it usually was the perfect place for any sort of breakdown.

Usually.

♡

“You okay there?”

The deep, amused voice made me jump slightly; quickly, I pulled the book from my face and dipped my head back, craning my neck – and felt my breath catch.

Oh.

A guy was standing a few feet away, his brows crunched together and eyes narrowed, but the corner of his lips twitched.

At least it looked that way from upside-down.

I blinked. Then I sent him a slow, sheepish smile from my position down on the carpeted floor, sprawled out on my back, head tipped back and neck craned to look up at him.

“Hi.”

The guy stared down at me, and slowly, his lips curved upwards.

My heart missed a beat, and my breath hitched.

Oh.

“Hi.” His voice sent a tingle over my skin, deep and warm. Creases dug into his cheeks as he grinned down at me.

Creases.

Crap.

Clearing my throat, I crunched my nose, smiling innocently up at him. “Can I – help you?”

“Shouldn’t I be the one asking you that?” The dude narrowed his eyes, but his lips twitched like he was trying not to smirk as he leaned his shoulder against one of the shelves. His voice rumbled through me, low because of our surroundings, sending tingles down my spine.

Using my book to scratch my chin, I squinted up at him. “Why?”

The dude’s eyes narrowed further, a slow grin spreading over his face.

Creases.

“Cause you’re laying starfish-style on the floor with a book on your face.” He raised his brows, eyes twinkling. “I don’t know ‘bout you, but to me, that kinda sounds like a breakdown.”

I blinked. Then I laborously pushed myself up into a sitting position, grumbling “Judgy much.” under my breath. Somehow, the guy still picked up on it, because he chuckled, the deep sound travelling, and my breath hitched. My eyes darted up, and for the first time, I really looked at him.

My heart got stuck in my throat, and I almost felt myself shrink a little.

Well, shit.

Of course he was gorgeous.

Dark eyes that tracked over my face in amusement, even darker hair, the top half pulled back haphazardly into a bun. His grin caused dimples to appear in his cheeks, there was a faded scar on the side of his face shifting with his smirk, and his jaw looked like it could cut through paper.

And then there were the tattoos.

All in black, they were scattered all over his muscled arms, down to the backs of his veined hands and disappearing into the sleeves of his t-shirt, peaking out above the collar. His shoulders were straining against the material even though it was hanging loosely on his wide frame, muscles working under the fabric when he shifted lightly in the spot, crossing his arms over his chest. I tried not to stare as his biceps tensed and relaxed again.

God, there probably wasn’t an inch on the guy’s body that didn’t carry muscles. Even with his loose joggers it was clear that he never skipped leg day, his biceps were the size of my head, and his chest and shoulders were broad enough I felt my throat go dry.

I blinked, and the guy’s shit-eating grin grew.

Ah, crap.

Clearing my throat, I quickly raised my brows.

“So, can I – help you?”

“I don’t know.” The guy narrowed his eyes in thought, pushing off the shelves. “Any reason you’re back here?” The corners of his lips twitched, his deep voice vibrating like he was holding back a smirk when he sauntered towards me. “Deleted someone’s assignment when they went to the bathroom? Spilled soda on a book worth more than your apartment?” Dimples formed in his cheeks when he grinned. “Smuggled in your cat?”

I crunched my brows.

That seemed – oddly specific.

“No...” It came out more like a question, my head dipping to the side in slight confusion, and the guy chuckled as he crouched down in front of me. A wave of his warm cologne washed over me, something dipped in my stomach, and he raised his brows at me with a smirk.

“Hope it hasn’t got anything to do with you currently blocking the number one hook-up spot on campus.”

I blinked. Then I snorted a little and started to giggle, raising my brows.

“You’re kidding, right?”

The guy stared at me, the corners of his lips slowly curving upwards.

I stared back with a wide smile that dimmed a little. Then I crunched my brows. “You’re joking.”

The guy grinned, his gaze tracking over my face.

“Nope. Wish I was.” He sighed deeply before crunching his brows. “Have you been back here often lately, ‘cause that would explain why suddenly every horny student has migrated to the fourth floor over at the auditorium; before you ask how I know,”, the corners of his lips tipped into a smirk, “I walked in on a couple fucking in the broom closet a week ago.”

I stared at him. For a second, my mind was simply blank as I felt heat wash into my face and the guy stared back, the corners of his lips twitching and eyes twinkling mischievously. Then I blinked and crunched my face in confusion.

“Why didn’t you knock?”

The guy arched his brows. “Knock. At a broom closet.”

I raised my shoulders, somehow managing to fight a wide smile when I widened my eyes at him.

“I don’t know; it’s a broom closet in an empty hall, that’s like the second most cliché place for a hook up. I mean,”, I tried to keep my lips from curving upwards, “you probably scared the crap out of them; neither of them will ever be able to do it in a confined space again because they’ll be too scared of you suddenly barging through the door, but – to the rest of the student body, a broom closet will still be pretty high up on the list!”

The guy snorted, dropping his head for a second as his shoulders shook with quiet laughter.

“So you’re saying it’s my fault?” He looked up at me again, creases digging into his cheeks as he grinned widely and raised his brows.

“Well, it’s definitely not mine.” I frowned, something giddy bubbling under my ribs as I tried to suppress a beaming smile. “What did you just walk into a broom closet for?!”

“I thought someone was dying in there.” The guy widened his eyes at me, his grin growing bigger. “That poor girl was faking her fucking heart out, and it wasn’t surprising, the guy was practically making her teeth chatter.”

A snorted giggle broke from my throat before I could hold it back, and the guy raised his brows, deep creases forming in his cheeks. “Seriously man; it was traumatising, I’m getting flashbacks every time I just open a fucking door.”

I tried to fight the giggles bubbling in my chest. “In that case, maybe it’s good then he can’t do it in small spaces anymore.”

For a second, we just stared at each other while suddenly, I couldn’t keep my grin at bay, my heart hopping against my ribs and the guy’s lips curving, dimples in his cheeks as his twinkling eyes pierced mine. Then I blinked, and my gaze caught on the clock on the wall behind him.

My eyes widened as something dipped in my chest, startled.

“Shit.”

Hastily, I crammed my book into my bag and scrambled to get to my feet. Looking around to make sure I hadn’t left anything, I turned – and almost ran face first into a broad chest.

My heart missed a beat, my gaze slowly moved up, and my breath caught in my throat as I felt my lips part a little.

Oh.

Crap, he was tall.

The guy’s lips curved like he could read my thoughts as he stared back down at me. He was so close, I could feel the scent of his cologne fill my lungs with every soft, hitching breath, something dark and warm and addicting.

I could have stepped back to make it more comfortable for both us. I probably should have; I was still barely an inch away from bumping into his chest and had to crane my neck to look up at him, the top of my head barely even reaching his shoulders, his own head dipped so he could hold my gaze.

But for some reason, I suddenly couldn’t move a muscle, my breath caught in my throat and my heart thrumming against my ribs as I stared up at him with slightly widened eyes. His wide shoulders were basically blocking the light and his broad, solid chest was radiating warmth, his scent making my head swim. There were green flecks in his iris, surrounding his dark pupils in a ring and melting into warm brown that slowly started to twinkle.

“What were you doing back here again?” The guy’s quiet voice vibrated like he was suppressing a grin, his eyes narrowing lightly.

Somehow, I kept myself from swallowing. Instead I managed to pull myself together with a huff and started to glower up at him.

“Not what you’re thinking right now.”

The guy slowly started to smile shit-eatingly, dimples digging into his cheeks as he raised his brows.

“Actually, sweetheart, you’re the one thinking it -”

Grumbling, I turned around, barely fighting the stupidly wide grin threatening to break over my face.

When I threw a quick look back before turning the corner, the guy was still standing in the same spot, dimples in his cheeks as he stared after me with a grin.

♡

Rain pattered onto the skylights above, the lamps dunking the quiet library in warm, golden light.

It had started chucking it down just a little after I had slipped into my favorite rarely visited section, setting up camp under the windows. I had gotten some work done before pulling my book from my bag, curling up against the wall.

Crunching my brows in focus, lost in the story, I was about to turn the page when a pair of sneakers appeared in my vision.

The scent of dust and paper was chased away by a dark, warm scent; my heart leapt into my throat and my head whipped up, and someone plopped down next to me.

My breath caught, and the guy that had been wandering my mind since his appearance in my section a few days ago stared at me with contemplatively narrowed eyes. There was the hint of a crease showing in his cheek, his loose sweatshirt somehow making him look even broader, and his huge frame dwarfed mine even with him sitting on the floor.

“You know…” He shifted, one tattooed hand rising from where it was loosely draped over his pulled up legs as he dipped his head towards me.

“Over there,”, squinting as his lips quirked, he pointed towards the aisles leading back into the main space of the library, “are workspaces where you can actually sit at a table instead of on the floor?”

I stared at him, and slowly, something started bubbling in my chest. It felt warm and giddy, causing my heart to hop and a big grin threatening to break free on my face.

Biting it back just barely, I crunched my brows.

“Yeah, but, over there,”, leaning his way without being able to help it, I also pointed towards the aisles and looked back at him, raising my brows dramatically, “you have to actually kill someone to get a seat.”

The guy chuckled, the sound travelling through me. Eyes crinkling and dimples digging into his cheeks, he grinned and leaned back against the wall, easily stretching out one long leg and propping his arm onto the other. I tried not to stare at the tattoos inked onto his skin, muscles flexing beneath when he shifted to get comfortable and smirked at me.

“I was hurt when you ran away from me the other day.”

Something fluttered high in my chest. “I didn’t run away, I had class.”

“You didn’t even say goodbye.” The guy’s eyes were twinkling even as he furrowed his brows with a pout, which – looked ridiculously adorable for a six-foot-something guy with tattoos all over.

“I was late.” Widening my eyes at him, I tried to fight that strange feeling that started bubbling in my chest, warm and giddy and causing my lips to try and break into a huge smile.

“You had time to stare at me.” The guy smirked, a crease digging into his cheek as his gaze lazily dragged over my face, and I glowered at him even as heat bled into my cheeks.

Damn it.

The guy’s grin grew, his eyes crinkling at the corners. Then he raised his brows, draping his hand over his knee.

“So you’re still sitting in the hook up-section.”

I huffed, trying to fight my twitching lips.

“Yeah, well; your word is the only one I got that this is actually a hook up spot, and I’m not about to give up the only place in this library where I don’t have to fight anyone to get a seat.”

“I'd fight for you.” The guy’s eyes were twinkling as he stared at me, his grin growing when a laugh broke from my throat.

“Besides.” I turned back towards my book and raised my brows, feeling my lips curve. “I decided that if that whole thing is true, then I will gladly keep scaring people off with my presence.”

The guy’s eyes were twinkling as his gaze dragged over my face. “You sure you’re the right person to scare anyone away?”

I quickly turned my head to scowl at him. “Hey; I might not be a fucking giant, but I can kick very painful places.”

The guy’s smirk widened, creases digging into his cheeks and iris sparkling as he stared at me. “Kinky.”

I huffed, mostly to suppress the laugh rising in my throat as the happy bubbling under my ribs grew.

“Also, I don’t have to be scary, just a person being here is gonna do the job.” I felt a cheeky grin tug at my lips when I arched a brow. “People generally don’t want an audience when they’re having a quicky in the library.”

The guy squinted at me, his lips curving.

“You talking out of experience?”

My cheeks heated, and I glared at him.

“I don’t know; you’re the one who heard people fucking in a closet and decided to take a look,”, I grumbled.

A deep laugh broke from the guy’s chest, the sound suppressed as he tipped his head back, his shoulders shaking as he laughed silently. Something hopped against my ribs, and I tried to fight the stupidly wide smile pushing onto my lips.

Breathing a chuckle, the guy dropped his head again with a grin, his twinkling eyes flickering over my face as he narrowed them.

“So why did you decide robbing people of quickies in the library was a good idea? Cause there’s a bunch of students 'bout to be really fucking pissed.”

“Because unlike a broom closet, no aisle here has a door. I don't wanna know how many people got traumatized because they were looking for a book at the wrong time,”, I grumbled drily before crunching my face. “Also; fucking in a library, have some respect, the poor books.”

“What, a broom closet is less sensitive?” The guy furrowed his brows, his lips twitching like he was fighting a laugh.

“Yeah; I mean, the only thing to defile in there are mops, and they’re used to dirty stuff,”, I mumbled absentmindedly.

For a second, there was silence, and when I raised my eyes before looking to the side, the guy was staring at me, the grin on his face slowly growing.

My lips started twitching, and a giggle bubbled in my throat.

“You know, I don’t even know your name.” The guy reclined lazily, his eyes bright when he raised a brow.

Staring back at him, I felt my lips curve. “Well, I don’t know yours, so I’d say that’s fair.”

The guy’s grin widened. Then he sent me a light wink.

“Cassian.”

Something leapt up and down under my ribs, and I tried to fight a wide smile.

“Y/N.”

For a second, we stared at each other, something bubbling wildly in my stomach. Then the guy, Cassian, blinked and crunched his brows, again looking ridiculously adorable.

“So what was that breakdown the other day about?”

I sighed and raised the book I was holding. “This. I’m really trying to enjoy it, but it’s just breaking my brain –“

“It’s a book, baby; how bad can it be?” Cassian’s lips curved into a smirk as he plucked it from my grip, crunching his brows as he turned it to read the back, and I felt my breath catch at the absolute nonchalance with which he called me baby. But somehow, I managed to push past it, widening my eyes at him.

“It’s the story, okay; listen –“

“Next station -”

The tinny voice coming from the speakers overhead ripped me out of my thoughts, and I raised my head, my gaze landing on the name of the station on the screen.

“Shit.” I felt my eyes widen as my heart jumped against my ribs, and I quickly darted out of my seat.

♡

“Sorry, excuse me –“, wincing, I weaved my way through the people coming my way from the crosswalk. Squinting against the last rays of sunlight, I breathed out, the cold air making me shiver gently as I slid my hands into my pockets and stopped at a red light. Rocking back and forth on the spot, I let my gaze flicker over the square behind the crosswalk.

I didn’t know why exactly today, my brain had decided to take me on a trip down memory lane. But it caused that same happy, bubbling feeling to rise under my ribs and made me barely suppress a wide, giddy grin.

The light shifted to green, and I crossed the street, feeling my brows furrow gently as I let my gaze wander over the square. The windows of the restaurants and shops reflected the last golden rays of light, there were people crossing the square; elderly couples, groups of teenagers -

My breath hitched in my throat, and slowly, a wide smile spread over my face.

In the middle of the square next to the fountain, a tall figure towered above all others, wide shoulders even broader under a dark puffer jacket, his profile lit by the last golden flickers of sunlight, straight nose crunched against the cold and strong jaw tensing and relaxing as he lazily shifted on the spot. His eyes slowly tracked over the square, the last light causing the scar on the side of his face to shift.

My heart rose in a warm thrum, and I whistled sharply.

Cassian looked over his shoulder, gaze darting over the people - until his eyes found mine.

Even from a distance, I could see the twinkle beginning to spread through his iris.

Creases slowly started forming in his cheeks, and something skipped happily against my ribs when my best friend began to grin shit-eatingly. The lines of his smirk, now, nearly two years later almost as familiar as my own, made my heart do a happy wiggle, and I began to beam back.

I quickened my steps, and Cass turned towards me, raising his brows as his lips curved.

I got faster, a happy giggle bubbling in my throat, then I crashed into him.

Cassian grunted, but the sound quickly turned into a chuckle as he leaned down with a dramatic groan and lifted me off the ground. His arms tightened in a squeeze around my waist, his shoulders broad and solid beneath my arms, and feeling something skip happily against my ribs, I swung my legs around his waist with a giggle, interlocking them tightly.

“Hi monkey.” Cassian’s deep voice rumbled through me, a little raspy as always and vibrating with a grin. Slipping his arms under my thighs to hold me up, he chuckled when I pulled back just enough to press a firm kiss onto his cheek.

The scent of his cologne started to fill my lungs, and something hopped happily against my ribs when I leaned back and saw a dimple forming in his cheek.

“Hi.” Sliding my arms around his neck, I grinned at him, and Cassian smirked, a crease digging into his cheek. The light hit his eyes when he shifted, causing the green spots in his iris to glow, and something wriggled in my stomach.

“You good?” Cassian hoisted me up a little to adjust his grip, grinning when I tightened my grip out of reflex.

“Yup.”

My belly grumbled, and Cass raised his brows.

I squinted. “Apart from that.”

Cassian smirked.

“You know, I’m always surprised by how much food you can stomach,”, his eyes narrowed, “it’s like you’re a little black hole for snacks or something –“

I glared and lightly slapped the side of his head, and Cass broke off with a deep chuckle that made my whole body shake.

“Leave me alone, I haven’t eaten all day.”

“You? Haven’t eaten?” Sliding his right arm under my ass to hold me up, Cassian freed his other hand to slap it against my forehead, brows dramatically crunching. “Are you sick, baby?!”

“Oh, fuck off.” Trying to push his hand away, I nearly lost my balance, quickly locking my legs tighter around his waist and linking my arms back together at the nape of his neck. Cassian chuckled, his warm eyes flickering over my face as he grinned at me, and I had to fight the overwhelming urge to press a kiss onto the side of his nose.

“I’m fine. Just got sucked into writing this morning and basically didn’t stop until like an hour ago.” I shrugged.

Cassian stared at me. Then his lips curved, and slowly, very slowly, that familar shit-eating grin spread over his face, only doubled tenfold now as he eyed me, creases digging deep into his cheeks.

I blinked and felt my heart do a little swerve.

“Don’t.”

My best friend widened his eyes lightly, even as his grin grew. “You don’t even know what I was gonna say!”

I widened my eyes back at him, something warm suddenly bubbling wildly in my chest. “I know you, dipshit; you were about to drop some suggestive innuendo about sucking!”

“Dude, your mind went there; I didn’t actually say anything -“ Cassian’s grin was broad as he raised his brows and slipped his hand back around my thigh, and my heart leapt against my ribs.

“I can’t with you.” I shook my head, barely keeping the warm, giddy feeling in my chest from causing a stupidly wide smile to spread over my face.

“Can’t without me either, baby.” Cassian smirked and winked, and I lost the fight against the giggle breaking from my throat.

“Put me down, you idiot.” Trying to keep the grin mirroring his in check and failing, I slid my legs off Cassian’s waist. “If Mor’s gonna make me drink, we gotta change the food-situation.”

Cass leaned down to place me back onto my feet with a dramatic groan.

“Alright.” Straightening laborously, he pulled his phone from his pocket and squinted at the screen. “We got - another hour until we’re meeting the others; so, let’s get you something to eat before you start getting hangry.”

“I don’t get hangry.” Frowning, I craned my neck to stare up at him indignantly.

Stuffing his phone back into his pocket, Cass stared back, brows rising.

“Okay, fine; maybe sometimes. A little.” Grumbling, I crossed my arms in front of my chest as I glared up at him, and Cassian slowly started to smirk, causing his cheeks to crease. Then he dropped his head, and something toppled under my ribs when he pressed a kiss onto my cheek, his hands sliding around my jaw to keep me from moving when the first was followed by another, and another, until my heart hopped and a giggle bubbled in my throat.

Cassian grinned against my cheek before pressing one last firm kiss against my temple.

“Alright, c’mon, sweet cheeks.” With a smirk, he straightened to his full height, his arm sliding over my chest and turning me around, his body pressing into my back as he started to push me down the sidewalk. I craned my neck to try and look up at him.

“Who’s party is this again?”

Cassian shrugged, the neon lights of a shop throwing shadows under his jaw and cheekbones, dark brows furrowed lightly.

“I don’t know, think someone from one of Rhys’ classes?”

I hummed, frowning in thought. “Think they’ll have food?”

“Nah, don’t count on it; we’re getting you something now.” Looking back, Cassian wrapped his arm over my shoulder, lightly drawing me into his side as a cyclist zipped past us.

My stomach twisted with a soft growl, and I looked up at him with a pout, fighting a smile. “Thanks.”

“Are you kidding?” Cass threw me a look, huffing. “Not eaten all day; you and I need to have a talk.”

Warmth rose under my ribs, and I looked back ahead, shaking my head even as a wide smile spread over my face.

Cassian sniffled against the cold air, pulling up his shoulders a little as he crunched his brows contemplatively. “I could eat."

“You can always eat.” I grinned teasingly up at him before yelping and snorting a giggle when Cassian tightened his grip and leaned down with a grin to playfully nip at my jaw. His breath hit my skin, something bubbled high in my chest, and Cass straightened up again with a smirk.

“Fuck yeah, baby. Food’s life.”

Snickering under my breath, I huddled into his side, shivering dramatically and chattering my teeth.

“Why is it still so fucking coooold –“

“Want me to warm you up?” Cassian’s grin was shit-eating enough that I snorted, elbowing him into the side. Whining dramatically, Cass tugged me into his side, grinning when he rubbed his palm over my arm and raised his brows.

“Okay, seriously, what do you wanna eat?”

♡

Crunching my brows, I studied the two packages of crisps in my head, trying to figure out which one to take.

Something warm brushed against my shoulder, then a head slowly appeared right next to mine.

I felt my lips twitch; a snorted giggle broke from my throat, and I quickly reached up and pushed Cassian’s face away from me.

His chest vibrated in my back as he straightened up with a deep laugh, his head tipping back, and shaking my own, still snickering softly, I raised the packages to squint at them dramatically.

“I can’t decide!”

"It's okay, I'll help with the rest." Grinning, Cassian leaned over my shoulder and plucked both of them from my grip, pressing a dramatic kiss onto my temple before straightening. His chest pushed into my back, and quickly snagging the packages from his grip, I piled them into my arms, letting him steer me down the aisle.

The small supermarket was fairly empty thanks to the time, the city and sky outside becoming darker by the minute as we reached the register. Dropping my things onto the conveyor belt behind what looked like a guy’s dinner and a girl’s grocery run for the weekend, I sighed happily at the sight of crisps and two bottles of soda.

Cass leaned over me to snag a pack of gum, throwing it down next to my stuff, then he straightened, his arms sliding around my collarbones and his chest pressing into my back when he rested his chin on my head. Snuggling into my jacket, I leaned into him, giggling into his sleeve when Cass squeezed me with a dramatic sound.

Something started bubbling happily against my ribs, and I felt Cassian grin into my hair. Then he placed his chin back on my head and slightly clacked his teeth together, the vibration travelling through me. I snorted and Cass chuckled, his chest shaking in my back.

The guy in front of the line paid as the girl got ready to start shovelling her groceries back into her cart, and I looked to the side, letting my gaze roam until it met the one of an elderly woman a register over. I sent her a grin, and the old woman beamed, her eyes gleaming as they darted back and forth between Cassian and me. Then she leaned over slightly, her voice lowered confidentially as she said with a wide smile: “Such a lovely couple.”

My heart dipped, and I froze, my eyes widening and lips parting awkwardly. But before I could quickly correct her, Cassian’s deep voice echoed from somewhere above me, a grin vibrating through his voice.

“Thanks.”

I blinked before quickly craning my neck to stare up at him in bewilderment.

The smirk I got in response was shit-eating, only topped by the quick wink that followed.

The elderly woman beamed happily, sending me a gracious nod before moving forward in line, and I quickly turned and elbowed Cass into the ribs, something skipping in my chest when I hissed: “What the hell?!”

“What?” Cassian dropped his head so he could mumble into my ear, his smirk still wide as he threw the old lady a look over my head. “Didn’t wanna disappoint her. Besides.” His nose grazed my temple, and his smirk became shit-eating as his eyes dragged over my face. “Can’t blame her for assuming.”

My breath caught in my throat, and my eyes darted back and forth between his, warm and twinkling and suddenly so very close with his head dipped.

With a blink, I pulled myself together and rammed my elbow into his ribs again, and Cassian whined softly and dramatically, his grin wide as he straightened up again.

Grumbling, I turned back ahead, trying to ignore the heat suddenly pulsing in my cheeks.

♡

“No, wai- stop that!” Quickly yanking the my fries away, I glared at Cassian, trying to keep in a laugh.

We were sitting on a bench circling the big tree at the corner where the others were supposed to meet us, the sky above dark, cars rushing past. I was huddled up, legs criss cross, my knee pressing into the side of Cassian’s thigh while he lounged against the backrest, squinting into the neon lights of a laundromat across the street. The wrappers of the burgers and fries we had picked up at the take-out place next to the supermarket were crunched up next to me, and one bag of crisps was open in Cassian’s lap, but for the past few minutes, he’d been trying to sneak his hand into the paper bag that contained the rest of my fries.

Glowering, I turned to hold the package out of Cassian’s reach, twisting as I dropped my head back to pop a fry into my mouth. Cass quickly leaned forward, his arm sliding past me, and I gave a sound of protest that bubbled with laughter as I hastily held out my arm, trying to put the package to safety.

“Stop it, you already had the rest of the extra fries, your burger, your fries, and that huge bite of mine, and you’ve got the whole package of crisps, why can I not eat this in peace?”

“Cause baby, I’m twice your size; how can you expect me to not still be hungry when you are?” Cassian’s grin was shit-eating, his warm breath brushing over my nose, and I glowered back at him.

For a moment, we stared at each other, faces only inches apart, the green flecks in Cassian’s eyes twinkling as something bubbled in my chest and I barely fought the wide smile trying to form on my lips. Then Cassian’s hand shot forward, I quickly tried to twist away, and a soft squeak broke from my throat when Cassian dipped forward, sliding his arm around my waist and dragging me into his body.

For a few seconds, we were caught in a scuffle as I tried to save my fries while aimlessly flailing my legs and shaking with uncontrollable giggles, Cassian’s huge body half burying me beneath him as he tried to reach the bag, groaning and cursing under his breath until he managed to snag some fries. A dramatic whine broke from my throat, and whooping lightly, Cassian sat up with a wide grin.

Breathlessly, I slumped against him, and Cassian tipped his head back and dropped the fries into his mouth with a smirk.

Grumbling, I tried to sit up, but Cassian’s arm wound around my waist wasn’t budging, instead sliding tighter around me.

For a few seconds, I struggled, then I gave up.

Slumping into his side in defeat, I huffed. Cassian’s scent started to rise into my nose, dark and warm and familiar, and I could feel the warmth radiating from him even through his puffer jacket.

Shivering slightly, I shuffled a little to get more comfortable, pulling up my legs. Cassian draped his arm over my collarbones, and I snuggled into the curve of his elbow, squinting into the light of the laundromat as I leaned my head against his chest. Then I plucked some fries from the little package and craned my neck to look up at my best friend, holding them up.

A wide grin spread over his face, and leaning forward quickly, Cass snagged them from my fingers, teasingly biting my knuckles. I yelped a laugh, slapping his chest, and Cassian’s chuckle vibrated through me when he leaned back, chewing lazily.  

Snuggling further into his arm with a happy sigh, I dropped some fries into my mouth, chewing contendly. I could feel Cassian shift as he took a sip of my soda, then he dropped his head to steal another fry from my fingers, sending me a wink when I glared up at him, dimples digging into his cheeks.

A few minutes later the fries were empty, and I was digging around in the second package of crisps, giggling breathlessly as Cassian kept dipping his head, lightly nipping my jaw.

“Stop the-“ Quickly holding out some crisps, I snorted when Cassian pulled them out of my grip with his teeth while grinning, dipping his head back to let them slide into his mouth.

There was a sharp whistle, and I turned my head, craning my neck.

My gaze flickered over the street until it caught onto three people slowly making their way towards us, and I started beaming and waved. Cassian’s body shifted in my back as he leaned over me with a soft grunt, stretching his arm out to dip his hand into the crisps and shortly making me vanish from sight.

When he straightened up again, three shadows fell over us, and I happily grinned up at our friends.

“Starting the party without us, I see.” Rhys shook his head in disappointment, letting his arm slip from Feyre’s shoulders. He was wearing a thick jacket, his hair fashionably messy as always, and the tip of his nose was pink from the cold, but the twinkle in his eyes was mischievous as usual.

“Hey, you’re the ones late,”, I grumbled with a pout.

“Someone took ages getting ready.” Feyre, also with a slightly pink nose and huddled into her jacket, rolled her eyes.

Both Cassian and I turned our heads to look up at Azriel, tall and brooding and never the one making anyone late.

Az returned our looks before raising a brow. “Very funny.”

Snickering, I laborously sat up up, Cassian’s arm sliding down my side. Feyre dropped down next to me onto the bench, freeing her hands from her pockets before she hugged me, her teeth chattering dramatically. Giggling, I squeezed her back.

“You two ready?” Leaning down slightly to greet Cassian with a bro-handshake, Rhys raised his brows.

“Yeah,”, I crunched my brow and squinted up at him, “where’s Mor though?”

“Should be -”, Feyre dipped her head to the side, “ah, nevermind.”

Leaning forward to follow her gaze, I nearly tipped off the bench, but Cassian's hand slid over my stomach, keeping me upright as I beamed when I saw a tall blonde speedwalk towards us, red painted lips glinting in the lights.

“Punctual as always!”, I yelled, causing Feyre to grin widely, and Mor called back loudly: “Fuck off!”

Snickering, I pushed myself up again, gathering all of our trash before getting to my feet on the bench. Cassian’s hand slipped off my waist, and I rested my own on his shoulder to laborously climb over his lap. His calloused fingers wrapped around my wrist, keeping me steady, and a deep chuckle travelled through me as Cass held onto me until I was on his other side, dimples digging into his cheeks as he smirked up at me. I flipped him off with a grin, then I turned around, wandering over the bench towards the trashcan on the other side of the tree.

When I got back, Cassian and Feyre had gotten off the bench, Cass towering over Mor who was bickering with Rhys over which way to go. Azriel caught my gaze over Feyre’s shoulder, rolling his eyes and causing me to snicker.

Coming to a halt on the bench next to where Cassian was standing, I exchanged a look with Feyre, and she sighed and stepped forward, trying to break up the bickering.

Shivering, my eyes got caught on Cassian’s profile, and my heart did a little flip.

“Hey Cass?”

Cassian looked up at me, and I raised my arms, beaming at him.

“Piggyback ride?”

My best friend smirked, eyeing me. “Sure you can carry me?”

I dropped my arms and glowered at him.

Chuckling, Cassian stepped towards the bench, turning his back towards me, and smiling brightly, I leaned down slightly, sliding my arms over his shoulders and hopping onto his back.

Cass caught my legs, his warm hands gripping my thighs before he slipped his arms under my knees, lightly hoisting me up. My chest pressed against his broad back, his scent rose into my nose, and grinning happily, I wrapped my arms around his neck.

“Okay, ready.”

“Can we just go?”, Cassian interrupted Mor and Rhys, a dimple forming in his cheek as he smirked. “By the time you two are done, the party's over.”

I parted my lips with a soft gasp. “The horror.”

Cassian’s chest rumbled as he laughed, his head tipping back lightly.

“Fuck off, baby.”

Grinning, I slung my arms tighter around his neck before crunching my brows and pouting. “Seriously, can we please just go; I don’t give a shit about how quickly we get there as long as we get there.”

“Amen,”, Azriel grumbled.

“Well, if he would listen to me –“ Mor glowered at Rhys.

The two started bickering again, and Az shook his head and brushed past us. “C’mon.”

I slid my arms tighter over Cassian’s collarbones, and Feyre sighed and slipped past her boyfriend, Cassian waiting until she was past him before following after her.

Resting my chin on my best friend's shoulder, I felt my heart do a happy wiggle as my body swayed with his steps. Behind us, the bickering slowly faded into the distance. Az and Feyre, a few steps in front of us, fell into conversation, Feyre linking her arm through Azriel’s, and Cassian craned his neck slightly to look back at me.

A deep crease slowly formed in his cheek as his eyes flickered over my face, and I crunched my brows.

“What? Do I have – something on my face?”

Cassian’s body vibrated as he chuckled and turned back ahead with a grin, squeezing my calves. “Nah.”

Staring at the side of his face for another second, I blinked before shrugging and leaning forward quickly to press a kiss onto his cheek. I could feel a crease forming beneath my lips, then I pulled back, grinning widely, and Cassian shook his head, gaze directed forward but eyes twinkling.

♡

Rhys and Mor caught up with us after maybe two blocks, both grumbling about being left behind, but I just snickered and slid off Cassian’s back, linking my arm through Mor’s to pull her with me.

The party of who-knows-who was located in some industrial loft further downtown. There were people standing in front of the entrance, smoking, a few stepping out of the way as Rhys pulled open the heavy steel door with a dramatic flourish. When I slipped into the stairwell after Feyre, I felt a warm, tall body towering in my back.

The music was audible even down here, and sliding my arm out of Feyre’s, I tipped my head back to stare up the winding staircase. I could feel the others push pass me, talking as they started to climb the stairs. Then something brushed against my back, and when I looked over my shoulder, Cassian’s breath hit my hair as he leaned forward, his chest pressing against my shoulders as he crunched his brows and stared up the stairwell.

“What are we looking at?”

A snorted giggle broke from my throat, and elbowing him into the ribs, I turned, sliding my hand around his wrist to tug him with me towards the stairs with a wide grin.

By the time we reached the fifth floor, the floor was vibrating, the noise of the party had doubled, and I was wheezing dramatically.

“God, who thought throwing a party up that many stairs was a good idea?” My voice was breathless as I held my sides, grimacing at the huge, open metal doors opposite of the stairs behind which lights flashed, illuminating the silhouettes of dozens of people. The others had apparently already gone in, because the landing was empty apart from empty bottles on the floor.

“Someone who’s never fallen down any steps while drunk.” I could hear the shit-eating grin in Cassian’s voice as his hands closed around my shoulders, rubbing slowly back and forth. I snorted a breathless giggle before straightening with a wince and, trying to steady my breathing, began to trudge over the landing, feeling my best friend in my back.

When I stepped through the open doors, I was hit by the noise and the music that made the thick, stale air vibrate. My gaze darted over the open floor loft, only lit by flashing lights changing colors and spotlights hitting the walls, so dark you could only see the outlines of the mass of people, and my breath caught in my throat. The noise and the amount of people crowding the space caused my chest to begin thrumming with a mix of exhilaration and anxiety, and something slowly closed around my lungs, making the flickering lights swim, the noise closing in on me -

A calloused hand slipped under my jacket, wrapping around my side as a solid chest pressed against my shoulders, and a familiar scent washed over me, chasing away the stale smell. My heart dipped; I ripped my gaze away from the crowd dipped in darkness and looked up over my shoulder, and something loosened in my chest.

Cassian was so close that I could see the details of the dark ink at the base of his throat, towering over me like a lighthouse in the dark as he let his gaze flicker over the crowd, the flashing lights illuminating his face and slightly crunched brows. His thumb absentmindedly brushed up and down over my ribs, and something started to bubble gently in my chest. The noise slowly faded to the edge of my conciousness, still present but no longer a weight on my senses, and I could feel my shoulders sink as the tightness around my throat slipped away.

“I think the others are over there!” Cassian’s deep voice vibrated through me as his grip tightened, then he dipped his head, and I could feel his shit-eating grin against my cheek when he called over the noise: “Want me to put you on my shoulders?”

I lightly kicked his shin, and Cassian’s chest shook when he laughed into my hair, his smile wide as he straightened. His body pressed into my back, and he started to gently push me through the crowd.

In the flashing lights, it was hard to even make out faces, the music causing the floor to vibrate and the noise leaving my skin humming. I quickly reached back, hooking my fingers into Cassian’s belt loops as my heart thrummed against my ribs, my breath hitching when I felt his body tower over mine like a rock between the waves.

Cassian’s grip tightened. Then the next second he drew me back into his chest just before some girls shoved past us. I nearly tripped over my feet, but Cass held me steady, and when I threw a quick look up at him over my shoulder, he was glaring after the group, muscles in his jaw flexing and a dark shift in his eyes.

Something toppled in my stomach when I felt his hand slip up a bit, wrapping around my ribcage, then his body pressed into mine, and Cass nudged me forward.

We caught up with the others about halfway through the loft. Feyre clocked us first, and I waited until a group of guys had pushed past us, yelling over the music and causing me to unconciously move back into Cassian’s grip. Then I stepped forward until I was standing next to her and crunched my brows.

“How ‘bout we find a - less crowded spot?”, I called over the noise, trying to sound lighthearted, but Feyre looked right through it. Squeezing my elbow comfortingly, she called back: “The guys are gonna see if they find a place to sit or something!”

Nodding back, I craned my neck to look up at Cassian. He was still towering over me, his hand wrapped around my ribcage protectively as he didn’t make any move to step away from me.

Warmth rose in my chest, and I leaned back into him without being able to help it, feeling him shift when he looked over his shoulder, then Mor appeared at my side, calling loudly: “Let’s go get something to drink!”

Glad about an opportunity to blend out some of the noise and chaos, I nodded, poking Cassian’s ribs to get his attention. He turned his head back towards me and dropped his gaze, and I stretched lightly to call: “We’re gonna go get drinks!”

“I’ll come with you!” Cassian’s deep, steady voice vibrated through me, and feeling something warm bubble high in my chest, I rolled my eyes with a grin.

“I’ll be okay, I got the girls! Just go with Rhys and Az, we’re gonna be fine!”

Cass crunched his brows, looking ready to protest, and with a soft laugh bubbling in my throat, I slid my hand towards his collar, tugging him down with a grin. Cassian complied easily, one corner of his lips curving as a wave of his scent washed over me, and stretching, I pressed a quick kiss onto his cheek, just long enough that I could feel a crease forming under my lips. Then I pulled back, and something leapt into my throat when my nose brushed against Cassian’s.

The room and noise faded. Cassian’s head was dipped so far that I could see the green specks in his twinkling eyes as they flickered over mine, only an inch away, so close that his breath was fanning over my lips. 

Like he could feel the way I suddenly stilled, Cassian’s gaze flashed. Something twisted low in my stomach when his lids suddenly grew heavier, eyes darkening with something deep, hazy, almost heated as they slowly dragged over my face, and suddenly, I was acutely aware of his wide, towering body half pressed against mine.

My breath caught, Cassian’s muscles shifted, and his lips parted as he slowly, absentmindedly ran his tongue over his bottom lip.

My heart got stuck somewhere in my throat, someone’s elbow hit my back and made me jump, and Cass blinked, his lips tipping back into his usual, lazy grin as he straightened slowly, nothing left of that strange, heated look but the light twinkle in his eyes when he dipped his head to call into my ear: “Stick close to the girls!”

Maybe it was the noise around us, but Cassian’s voice sounded deeper, travelling through me and almost causing me to shiver. But somehow, I managed to push away the way my heart pounded against my ribs and poked his side, sending him a wide, cheeky grin. “Duh.”

Cassian’s chest vibrated when he chuckled, his cheeks creasing as he dropped his head to press a kiss against my temple, and something leapt against my ribs. Then Feyre took my hand and pulled me with her.

♡

After raiding the kitchen area at the other end of the loft, we squeezed back through the crowd towards the windows where couches were set up. Mor was carrying shotglasses and a bottle with clear liquid that just the sight of had already made me feel woozy, glancing over her shoulder every few steps to check on us and glaring at anyone who got too close. Feyre had beerbottles in her arms, her hand on my shoulder as she stayed in my back, and I was carrying boozy lemonade I had found in the fridge, the ice cold cans pressing against my arms and keeping my focus away from the crowd and bass vibrating through the floor.

Mor slipped past a group of guys, and following after her, I threw a quick look back to make sure Feyre was still behind me before turning ahead again, and something leapt high in my chest.

The boys had cleared one of the couches and two armchairs facing them. In the flickering lights, I could see Cassian’s teeth flash when he grinned, a chuckle causing his shoulders to shake. He was lounging on the couch, melted into the cushions, his long legs spread lazily. His black t-shirt was straining against his wide shoulders, the colorful, raging lights flickered over the tattoos scattered over his arms all the way down onto his hands, and deep creases formed in his cheeks when he smirked at something Rhys said.

Mor called their names over the noise, and when I blinked, Cassian’s gaze darted over the crowd, finding mine over her shoulder. The corners of his lips curved up, a lazy twinkle spreading through his eyes as he started to smirk.

Rolling my eyes, I took two of the beerbottles Feyre handed me and squeezed past Azriel. He was occupying one of the armchairs, boot propped up onto the coffee table and sending me a faint smirk when I handed him a beer.

Cassian grinned up at me as I moved to squeeze into between the coffee table and the couch, his legs falling apart further to make space for me, and I handed him the other bottle of beer.

“Here,”, I called over the loud, blaring music, and Cassian straightened and leaned forward, snatching my wrist.

My heart nearly toppled out of my chest, and I yelped softly when he pulled, dragging me down onto his lap.

My breath caught in my throat as I toppled into him, chest colliding with his, Cassian’s breath grazing my lips and nose nearly bumping mine. One corner of his lips tipped upwards as his twinkling eyes dragged lazily over my face. Then he dipped forward, and I made a light noise of surprise, hastily holding onto his shoulders when his arm slid around the back of my butt, nearly lifting me into his chest as he dragged me closer until my thighs bracketed his hips.

Something skipped into my throat, and I huffed, causing Cassian’s grin to widen as he slouched back into the cushions, his head tipping back lazily as he stared at me.

“Best seat in the house, baby.”

I snorted under my breath, feeling my lips curve into a wide grin as I leaned forward to speak into his ear. “I don’t know; Az looks pretty comfy too -”

Cassian leaned forward quick as lightning, and my laugh caught in my throat when he lightly sank his teeth into the soft skin of my neck just below my ear, his grin so wide, I could feel it against my skin.

Curling my fingers into his hair like reflex, I held my breath, and, dimples showing in his cheeks, Cassian pulled back, his eyes twinkling.

Huffing, I managed to tear myself away from the sight of his curving lips and the crease digging in his cheek. Flicking his forehead, I shifted to get comfortable in his lap, feeling warmth rising in my chest when Cassian’s large hand cupped my hip to keep me from sliding away to the side.

“Did we miss anything?”, I called over the noise, carefully opening one of the cans I had dropped onto the couch.

Cassian made a non-commitical sound and plucked the drink from my fingers, turning his head to take a sip. His throat worked when he swallowed, causing the tattoo at the base of his neck to ripple, then he made a face.

“Urgh.” Blinking and smacking his lips, he looked at the can, brows crunching. “How the fuck can you drink that?”

“By knowing it’s the only thing you won’t drink for me!” I grinned and pulled the can from his grip, something warm bubbling happily in my chest, and Cassian’s body started shaking as he tipped his head back with a deep laugh.

Grinning, I took a sip, feeling Cassian’s gaze drag over my face and down my throat.

“Hey!” Mor’s loud voice made me look over my shoulder, and when Cass dipped his head to the side to look past me, the blonde grinned widely. “They got a beer-pong table!”

My heart dipped, and slowly, I felt a grin spread over my face.

A couple minutes later, we had fought our way through the crowd and Mor and I were standing on one end of the dining table by the windows, cups arranged in front of us and Azriel and Cassian on the other side. Cassian’s eyes were twinkling in the light as he propped his arm onto Azriel’s shoulder, raising his brows at me, and without a word spoken, I saw the challenge in the way he smirked as his eyes dragged lazily down my body.

Something rose under my ribs, and I narrowed my eyes, feeling a wide, cheeky smile slowly spread over my face. Then I lightly nudged my chin forward.

Do your worst.

Cassian started to grin. Sliding his arm off Azriel’s shoulder, he caught the ping-pong ball some guy threw his way and turned slightly, raising his hand. Then he sent me a wink and tossed.

♡

A few hours later, the sky outside was pitchblack and a happy buzz had taken over my entire body, making me very giggly and a little sleepy.

“Hey.” A finger gently tapped my nose, and I shifted, forcing my eyes that had started to feel very heavy to open, and my breath caught a little in my throat.

Cassian stared down at me, a grin causing dimples to dig into his cheeks. Then he dipped down his head, and his breath grazed my cheek when he called into my ear: “Think it’s time we get you home, baby!”

I didn’t protest, not with how heavy my limbs and eyes had started to feel. Instead I reached up to poke Cassian’s cheek and sent him a wide, slow beam that caused his own grin to widen.

It’s goofy edge, the depth of his dimples and his pupils, blown and darker than usual, were the only signs that he definitely wasn’t sober anymore either.

Slowly freeing myself from where I had curled into his side, I felt Cassian’s arm slide off my shoulder, curling around my waist instead to keep me steady, and following a warm, lazy impulse, I leaned up and pressed my lips onto his cheek, long enough for his scent to fill my lungs, dark and warm and mixed with a boozy edge.

When I pulled back, Cassian turned his head, and in the flashing lights, his eyes suddenly seemed deeper and darker, his warm breath grazing my lips as his gaze dragged over my face. Then he blinked, his lips curved upwards and creases appeared in his cheeks, and his arm slid tighter around me when he dipped his head and pressed a slow kiss onto my cheek. His nose dragged over my skin, and shivers raced down my spine.

Somehow, I pulled myself out of the warm, buzzing feeling that filled my chest and turned around, pushing myself to my feet laborously. The room tipped just a little and I only nearly tripped over my own feet, but large, warm hands wrapped around my waist, holding me upright, and a giggle bubbled in my throat when I felt Cassian’s wide chest pressing into my back. Craning my neck to stare up at him, the warm buzz seemed to swell when I caught a glimpse at his wide, dimpled grin, his chuckles causing both our bodies to vibrate.

Cass leaned down his head, and his breath grazed my cheek when he called into my ear: “Let’s say bye to the others and then get the fuck outta here!”

♡

The next bus was another half an hour, so Cassian and I walked the way from the loft to my apartment.

The night air was cold and crisp, making the warm bubbling feeling in my chest swell even as the wind nipped at my skin. I slid my hand into Cassian’s after few blocks, his palm large and warm, engulfing mine as I linked our fingers and quickened my steps, tugging him with me, the happy, bubbling buzz in my body causing a giggle to rise in my chest, the smile on my face so stupidly wide it made my cheeks hurt when I turned and walked backwards, swinging our hands. Cassian’s answering grin was unrestrained and wide, causing dimples to dig deep into his cheeks when he pulled me back into his side, his arm sliding over my shoulder. Giggles broke from my throat when I bumped into him, nearly stumbling.

Cassian chased me the last few steps to the front door, even drunk still quicker than me, his arms wrapping around my waist just as I leapt onto the front step, and the storm of wild flutters in my chest reached new heights when he twirled me around in a circle, his chest vibrating as he laughed into my hair at the giggles bubbling from my throat that I just couldn’t contain.

“Stop i-“ I almost tripped when he dropped me back onto my feet, a snorted giggle leaving me, and warm hands gripped mine, keeping me upright as Cassian laughed fully, head tipped back and shoulders shaking. I flipped him off, and Cass caught my hand, grinning so widely, creases formed in his cheeks. He looked a bit flushed, from the cool air and the alcohol that seemed to make his gaze slower, more intense as it dragged over my face, and feeling something dip in my stomach, I turned around, trying to get my keys out of my pocket.

The warm light in the staircase flickered on when I pushed open the door. Shushing Cass and trying to suppress a giggle at the offended look he sent me, I nearly groaned at the sight of the stairs.

By the time we made it to the third floor, I was out of breath and desperately trying not to laugh at nothing in particular, the happy bubbling buzz in my chest making it hard to stay quiet as I dragged Cassian to my door.

Trying to slide my key into the lock, I missed, and a snorted giggle burst from my throat, shaking my body so badly, I leaned my forehead against the door, trying to keep the giggles in as more bubbled in my chest.

There was a deep, chortled laugh behind me, then I felt a warm weight in my back and a solid body pressing against mine when Cassian leaned an arm against the doorframe and dropped his head to smother his chuckling in my hair. The scent of alcohol rose into my nose, mashed with that scent that was just him, deep and dark and warm, causing my heart to rise, and I inhaled it softly without being able to stop it.

Trying to suppress more giggles, I pulled back my head just enough to look down, squinting dramatically. After two more tries, my key finally found the lock, jingling quietly when I turned it, and whooping softly, I pushed open the door.

My apartment was only lit by the glow of the streetlamps outside falling through the windows, the sky outside inky black like Cassian’s hair. I kicked off my shoes in the small hall, hopping on one leg and nearly falling over, causing a startled, snorted laugh to leave me.

“Fuck, I love your place.” Breathing out happily, Cassian let the door fall shut and slid out of his jacket, carelessly throwing it over the shoe rack before moving past me, and I switched on the small lights in my bedroom, just in time to see him collapse onto my bed.

“Dude,”, I whined, crunching my brows, “not the clothes on my bed!”

Cassian snorted before he rolled onto his back and started to laugh, his head tipping back and body shaking, and something rose high in my chest when I caught a glimpse at his face; the way his closed eyes crinkled and dimples dug into his cheeks.

Grumbling, I started taking off my socks, and still grinning, Cass pushed himself to his feet with a soft, dramatic grunt, his chest pressing into my shoulders as he pushed past me with a chuckle. I felt my skin tingle where his hands had closed around my ribs.

Cass ducked his head to the side to not hit it at the doorframe and trudged into the small kitchen, opening the fridge, and I made a face and started to shimmy out off my pants that had started to feel incredibly uncomfortable a while ago.

Screw jeans. I wanted joggers.

Kicking them to the side, I turned around, moving towards my bed while wrangling myself out of my top and carelessly throwing it over a chair. Tugging my bra over my head, I unceremoniously dumped it onto the floor before dragging the oversized t-shirt I slept in out from under my blanket. It vaguely smelled of something else besides me, something warm and dark and addictive, and after sliding into it, I buried my nose at the collar, breathing in deeply.

Something swelled and fluttered against my ribs, and I turned around with a happy sigh.

Cass was still bent over the fridge, arm propped onto the open door and head stuck inside, grumbling under his breath as he dug through the contents. Feeling a wave of giggles bubbling in my throat, I kicked our shoes out of the way and squeezed into the bathroom to wash off my make-up that had started to feel sticky on my skin. Nearly groaning happily, I dried my dripping wet face before raising my head and catching a glimpse at myself in the mirror; eyes bright and hair messy.

Looking around for the joggers I had left in here before leaving earlier, I crunched my brows. Then I shrugged and turned around.

“What are you even looking for?” I pulled the bathroom door close behind me before stepping into the door to the small kitchen and leaning against the frame, feeling the warm, bubbling feeling rise against my ribs when I stared at Cassian’s large frame towering in my kitchen, chugging soda from a colorful can. My gaze flickered over the curve of his throat and the tattoo rippling at its base, and something curled low in my stomach.

Finally dropping his head, Cassian swallowed and exhaled dramatically. “That was good.” He dropped the can into the trash before turning around, and I could see his movements slow as his gaze dragged down my body. His eyes flashed with something heated, growing deep and hazy, and my breath hitched, the warm feeling in my chest swelling.

Cass blinked, and slowly, he started moving, his piercing gaze never leaving my face as he walked towards me. A wave of his scent washed over me, warm and addictive, and all my thoughts quieted down when he leaned his shoulder against the doorframe, his knuckles brushing against my side as his low-lidded eyes dragged over my face. My chest brushed against his t-shirt, his warmth travelling even through the layers of clothing, and I stared up at him, feeling the warm thrum in my chest as my lips parted softly, my breath hitching as the warm buzz under my ribs swelled. My mind felt slow, hazy, muddled either by the alcohol cursing through me – or by Cassian’s scent filling my lungs, the warmth radiating from his large body, pulling me in, and the way he was gazing down at me, his eyes hooded and dark under heavy lids, an intensity in the way his gaze dragged over my face that sent tingling shivers over my whole body.

My breath caught in my throat, and my thoughts narrowed.

Beautiful.

All of him. The dark ink all over his skin, the shift of his muscles and hazy heat in his goddamn beautiful eyes. It felt like all of him pulled me in to swallow me whole, made my chest flutter with something so powerful, it caused my breath to catch as I stared up at him, my heart thrumming warmer against my ribs with every second.

And just because it felt like I might combust if I didn’t, I stretched and kissed him.

Something burst in my stomach, like hundreds of bubbling fireworks rising to the surface.

Cassian's lips were soft and tasted like fruit soda and alcohol, sweet and bitter at once. My chest swelled as my fingers curled into the soft cotton of his t-shirt and Cassian’s lashes fluttered against my cheek. Then a deep, low sound broke from his throat, and dropping his head to meet me, Cass slid his hands up my sides. His calloused palms wrapped around the sides of my neck, and exhaling deeply like a weight had lifted from his shoulders, Cassian kissed back like he’d been starving for it.

The rising feeling in my chest burst into a warm, fluttering storm.

Sinking down onto my heels, I dragged him with me, gripping his shirt and curling my fingers into the nape of his neck, feeling his warm skin and the way he shuddered at my touch, causing my heart to thrum and the bubbling feeling under my ribs to swell.

Making a deep, hoarse noise, Cassian moved until his wide chest pressed into mine, and his hand wrapped around my ribcage, dragging me into his body as he kissed me harder.

He was kissing me like he was trying to swallow me whole, devour me, his jaw flexing with every kiss that deepend, hungry lips parting mine, tongue swiping into my mouth like he was trying to memorize the way I tasted.

I dug my fingers into his sides when Cass began to push me backwards, feeling the planes of his torso, warm and hard, flush against mine and his body towering over me, causing the warmth bubbling in my chest to swell and heat to pool in my panties.

My back hit a wall, and something curled low in my stomach when Cass groaned low in his chest as his whole body pressed against the length of mine, so close my breath caught in my throat. His long fingers curled into my hair, and Cass dragged my head back and dipped his own to kiss my throat bruisingly.

My heart leapt into my throat, I sucked in a breath, and my eyes fluttered shut as my lips parted.

Cassian moaned against my skin, his hot breath heavy as he dragged his lips down the side of my bared neck, licking, biting, teeth sinking into my skin and leaving soft whimpers tumbling from my lips. His hand slid down to my waist and slipped under my t-shirt, and I held my breath when his palm dragged up my side to cup my ribcage, his calloused skin burning against mine.

Raising his head breathlessly, Cassian crashed his lips against mine, and the flutter in my chest hitched like my breath. His hand slipped further into my hair as his lips parted mine, tongue swiping greedily into my mouth, and a whimper spilled from my throat as I clung to him, kissing back feverishly.

Cassian groaned against my lips, biting down onto the bottom one and pulling lightly, causing my insides to flutter madly. Dropping his forehead against mine, he breathed heavily, and when I forced my eyes to open, my heart leap into my throat at the sight of his, half-lidded and feverish as they dragged over my face.

Cassian's throat worked like he was suppressing the urge to swallow, then his hand slipped away from my ribcage, his fingers brushing down over my stomach.

My lips parted, and my fingers curled into his shirt as the buzz in my chest slowed to a heavy, warm thrum.

Cassian watched me through hazy hooded eyes, swollen lips parted as he absentmindedly ran his tongue over the bottom one. Then his thumb hooked into the waistband of my panties.

The bubbling feeling in my chest rose until I held my breath.

Cass shifted and his nose nudged against mine, his head dipped so far that I could feel his hot, heavy breath on my lips, could see the green flecks in his iris bleeding together, and warmth built in my chest, fluttering wildly at the feverish look in his hazy, half-lidded eyes. His lips grazed the corner of my mouth, causing the thrum between my legs to tighten. Then his finger pulled at the waistband of my panties, and dragging them down my legs, Cassian dropped down to one knee.

My eyes widened, my heart rising, and my hand flew out to hold onto the doorframe as the other shot down to bury in his hair, some part of my brain catching up with the fact that he couldn’t possibly want to –

“Open your legs.” Cassian’s deep, hoarse order mumbled against my hip sent shivers down my spine so violently, my body shook.

“I –“

One big, calloused palm slid under my knee, and I nearly lost my balance when Cass dragged it up and over his broad shoulders.

My heart leapt into my throat, my back hit the wall, and Cassian groaned, his eyes hooded as he ran his nose up the inside of my thigh before biting down softly where my leg and hip met.

“Fuck.” His raspy words sounded slurred as he squeezed his eyes shut. A muscle in his jaw worked and I felt his wide shoulders shift. Then he dipped forward with a soft sound and ran his tongue greedily through my folds.

My lips parted as pleasure raced up my stomach and my fingers dug into his hair, and Cassian gave a noise sound low in his throat that sent my back arching.

“Shit, baby, you’re perfect,”, he mumbled into my skin, his deep voice so hoarse, it slid over my skin like sandpaper. His pupils were so large, they swallowed all color of his iris as he stared up at me through hooded eyes, hazy and heavily lidded as his palms closed around my hips, and with another soft groan, Cass dove forward, running his tongue hungrily over my pussy.

My body spasmed as my head fell back against the wall and pleasure twisted through me. Cassian was moving like he was trying to map out every inch of me, tongue circling my clit before dipping lower, coaxing whimpers from my throat.

“Shit –“

Cass buried his nose in my skin and sucked my clit into his mouth, and my eyes rolled into the back of my head as my fingers dug into the doorframe and shaky curses spilled from my lips. My hips rolled forward, and Cassian grunted.

“Fuck, you’re killing me.”

Diving forward, his hazy eyes on my face, he sucked, slow, hard, his warm hands sliding lower, holding me in place as he firmly ran his tongue over me.

“Oh.” My insides twisted as heat washed through me from my muddled head to tensing legs, and my lips parted, no sound leaving my throat as I grabbled to hold onto something, my pussy clenching, and Cass groaned.

“Shit, do that again.” He pressed closer and sucked harder, his hooded gaze piercing my face. The sounds bounced off the walls, causing my insides to wind tighter and my body to stutter.

“Fuck.” My fingers curled into Cassian’s hair, and he groaned, deep and hoarse, his eyes fluttering and tall body bowing into mine as he pushed me further into the wall, lapping greedily at me.

My breath caught as I clung to the doorframe, feeling a familiar tightness build in my lower stomach, twisting more taut with the second.

“Shit,”, I whimpered; Cass dove forward, licking and sucking harshly, and my eyes rolled back as without warning, the tension snapped.

My back arched as my body shook and pleasure crashed over me in a tidal wave harder than anything I had ever experienced. My eyes squeezed shut, head pressing against the wall as I cried out, feeling my insides shudder and tighten, pulsing harshly around nothing, and Cassian tightened his grip around me, his moan vibrating through me and causing my limbs to tremble.

My body shook, and I slumped against the wall, trying to catch my breath, heat washing through me, skin buzzing and insides thrumming. Then a soft, delirious giggle broke from my throat, my heart pounding against my ribs as I leaned my head back and closed my eyes as the warm, bubbling feeling in my chest swelled.

Lips pressed against my hip, followed by teeth sinking softly into my skin before something warm brushed against my chest and calloused hands slid under my shirt to keep me upright.

Still breathing a little unsteadily, I forced my hazy eyes to open, and the warm thrum under my ribs grew tenfold when I found a tall body towering over me, so close our chests almost pressed together.

Cassian’s gaze was heavy-lidded and feverish, his lips swollen and parted, a dimple digging into his cheeks as he stared down at me through hazy, twinkling eyes.

My breath caught in my throat, and Cass blinked, his gaze shifting, becoming deeper, molten, hungry.

My heart rose, I swallowed, and Cass made a low, rough sound deep in his throat as his piercing gaze flickered over me face. Then he dropped his head, and I sucked in a sharp breath when his lips crashed onto mine.

My eyes fluttered, and a soft moan broke from my throat when I stretched, clinging to him as I dug my fingers into his shirt and kissed back feverishly.

Cassian’s body pressed closer, rough palms cupping my sides as he started pushing me backwards into my bedroom. Half-stumbling, half-pulling, I tugged him with me, curling my fingers into his t-shirt, the warmth and strength of his body towering over mine causing something to bubble and swell in my chest, and Cassian’s lashes fluttered against my cheek when he made a low, hoarse sound against my lips. Then he dropped his head, and his hand slid into my hair and dragged my head back.

A broken moan vibrated through my chest when he attacked my neck, kissing and sucking harshly, sinking his teeth into my throat until my lids fluttered and I fought soft whimpers.

My fingers tugged at his t-shirt desperately, pulling it up, and Cassian let off my neck just long enough to help me drag the soft fabric over his head.

Dropping it carelessly, I stretched, my lips crashing onto Cassian’s as my fingers curled into the hair at the back of his neck. My hand ran down his warm chest, and I felt his muscles shudder under my touch, causing warmth to buzz under my ribs and something to twitch low in my stomach.

Heat rose in my chest, and I broke the kiss to start trailing hungry, breathless kisses down his throat, sucking and biting gently at his pulsepoint, drunk on the taste and softness of his skin. A low moan vibrated through Cassian’s chest, the sound so deep it travelled through me as he let his head fall back, jaw flexing, and I softly bit into his collarbone, licking over the spot before pressing kisses down to his right pec, my tongue trailing over the art inked onto his skin.

Cassian made a sound somewhere between a groan and a moan, his fingers curled into my hair, and when I raised my head, thoughts hazy, he crashed his lips onto mine.

I whimpered, and Cass swallowed the sound greedily, his tongue wrestling past mine, swiping into my mouth. I inhaled sharply, my fingers digging into his warm skin, Cassian pushed closer, his large body pressing against mine, and without breaking the kiss, he leaned down and slid his calloused hands under my thighs, lifting me off my feet.

Wrapping my arms around his neck, I sank my teeth into his bottom lip, and Cassian's eyes fluttered as he moaned before breaking into a deep chuckle, his lips curving upwards into a wide grin against mine. His hand squeezed my ass, and feeling that bubbling feeling in my chest swell, I let the giggle in my throat break free, my fingers sliding into Cassian’s soft hair.

Beginning to walk towards my bed, Cassian dropped his head and bit into the soft skin below my ear, licking and sucking at the spot harshly, and my eyes rolled back as I clung to his large, warm body, his bare skin pressing against my thighs and the muscles in his back shifting, causing something in my chest to soar. Then Cassian let himself drop forward, and a startled squeal broke from my chest when my back hit the mattress, turning into unrestrained giggles when his huge body buried me under its weight.

Grinning into my neck, Cassian dropped his head, and something tumbled in my stomach when his gaze clashed with mine as he sank his teeth into the fabric of my t-shirt, his dark eyes hooded and heated.

“Off.” The deep, mumbled order sent shivers over my body, and I pushed myself up, quickly starting to shimmy out of the fabric, Cassian’s tattooed fingers curling into the hem, helping to tug it up my torso. His eyes seemed to grow more hazy and heavy lidded the higher the seam went, and a low grunt escaped his throat when I slipped it over my head.

Dropping his head, Cass nuzzled his nose against my collarbone, sinking his teeth softly into my skin. Then he dragged his lips lower, and my back arched, a flutter exploding in my lower stomach when he slowly circled his tongue over my nipple.

“Shit.” My fingers dug into his neck, and Cassian groaned softly, his eyes fluttering when he buried his nose in my skin, biting the soft skin of my breast before sucking it into his mouth as far as possible.

A soft shaking sound broke from my throat and trembling shivers ran through my body as my insides twisted and the bubbling feeling in my chest rose, and Cassian moaned low in his chest as he started to suck and lick my nipple greedily until my fingers dug into his nape and I arched into him with a breathless whine.

Running his nose over my skin, Cass pressed a lazy kiss against a forming bruise, then he switched sides, his calloused palm closing over my breast. I sucked in a sharp breath, my heart leaping into my throat, and Cassian watched with hazy eyes as a tattooed finger slowly circled my nipple until the pull was so tight, I squirmed, soft whimpers breaking from my throat as I pressed my head into the mattress and squeezed my eyes shut.

“Perfect,”, Cass mumbled raspily against my skin, sinking his teeth lightly into the soft skin above my breast before dragging his lips up to my neck, running his tongue teasingly over my throat. My hand shot up to grip his hair as I fought for breath, and Cassian dipped his head and kissed me, lazy and hungry, parting my lips and dragging his tongue over mine.

A shiver shook my body, I could feel Cassian's lips curve upwards, and warmth bubbled in my chest as I felt a soft, delirious giggle rise in my throat.

Cass grinned against my lips, his forearms pressing down into the mattress next to my shoulders as he shifted, his hips lodging into between my thighs, and the giggles got stuck in my throat when I felt the hard bulge in his pants press against my core.

A breathy sound escaped me as my hand shot out to dig into his back; my back bowed and my hips bucked, and Cassian groaned against my lips, his teeth sinking into the corner of my mouth. My eyes fluttered when I felt the outline of his cock, huge and what had to be painfully hard, straining against his jeans, and the rising feeling in my stomach grew unbearable.

My fingers were trembling with need as I slid my hands down over Cassian’s stomach, my chest thrumming and stomach buzzing, and I hooked my fingers into his belt, the clasp clinking when I pulled to open it. My eyes fluttered when his teeth sank into my neck, and cursing breathily, I tried to tug at his pants.

Cassian snorted a laugh into my skin, and a giggle burst from my throat as I kicked his ass with the heel of my foot.

“Stop – laughing –“

Cassian’s shoulders shook as his deep, unrestrained chuckles caused his body to vibrate, and my heart got stuck in my throat when he raised his head, dimples digging into his cheek, eyes hazy and grin wide.

“Need help?” Teasingly, he rolled his hips down, grinding his hard on against my pussy, and my back arched at the jolt of pleasure racing down my spine, a whimper breaking from my throat the same second a low groan tore from Cassian's chest, his eyes fluttering.

My heart leapt against my ribs, and an uncontrolled, breathless giggle spilled from my lips.

“Fuck you.” My breathy voice vibrated with more giggles that shook my body, my chest buzzing, drunk on alcohol and kisses and the familiar, dark scent filling my lungs, and I felt Cassian's face split into a wide grin against my neck. Then he raised his head, blown iris twinkling, and my heart leapt against my ribs when he nudged his nose against mine, lips ghosting over mine and crease digging into his cheek as he mumbled huskily: “That’s your job, baby.”

My breath caught, something twisted sharply in my stomach, and Cassian's hazy eyes pierced mine.

Swallowing softly, I reached down, touching his belt.

"Off." My voice was just a whisper, breathless and hoarse as heat built deep in my stomach, thrumming under my skin.

Cassian's gaze flashed, flaring as his heavy lids fluttered. Then he pushed himself up, his warm, solid weight disappearing from my body as he sat up. His hazy, dark eyes pierced mine, and without looking away, he started unbuckling his belt.

My lips parted softly as my gaze followed his tattooed hands like hypnotized as they undid his button, slipped into the back pocket of his jeans and pulled out a foil package, raising it to his mouth so his teeth could rip it open. Then they slid under the waistband, and Cassian pushed his jeans and boxers down his hips in one.

My soft inhale got stuck in my throat. Scorching heat washed over me, setting my cheeks aflame as my lips parted further and I couldn't do anything but stare, at sharp v-lines and flexing muscles as Cass slid the condom over his hard length.

My insides tightened, throbbing around nothing, and swallowing, feeling the bubbling feeling in my chest rise up into my throat, I tore my gaze away. My eyes darted up, and my breath hitched when my eyes found Cassian's, deep, heated and hazy beneath low lids as they pierced mine. Then he leaned forward, and his palms pressed into the sheets next to my sides. The mattress dipped under his weight when he pushed his pants off, his blown iris never breaking away from mine, then he moved up my body until he was hovering over me.

Staring up at him, a wild flutter rising under my ribs, I felt my breath hitch, and slowly, Cass lowered his head until his nose grazed mine.

My lips parted, and with a low, deep noise, Cassian leaned forward and crashed his lips onto mine.

My soft inhale got caught in my throat, something in my chest rose in a flutter, and with a quiet, needy sound, I stretched to slip my arms around his shoulder, my fingers curling into his hair as I inhaled sharply. Then I kissed back feverishly, and Cass groaned softly, his lips parting mine greedily, and his tongue swiped into my mouth, sliding against mine.

My body shuddered, and I arched closer as Cassian slowly lowered himself until his forearms pressed into the mattress next to my head. His chest brushed against mine, his warm, smooth skin causing shivers to travel down my body, and I felt myself push closer almost involuntarily until Cass let himself sink lower, my muscles going lax at the feeling of his warm, massive torso pressing mine heavily down onto the mattress. My thighs slowly fell apart, and Cassian shifted, his chest sliding against mine and causing my nipples to tighten. Then his tip dragged through my folds, and my heart leapt into my throat as I gasped against his lips, fingers digging into his shoulders.

Cass groaned, low and hoarse. His throat worked, jaw muscles flexing, and his heavy lids shuddered.

“If you want me to stop, you tell me.” His voice was so raspy, it sent shivers down my spine.

My fingers dug into his back when I felt his cock slide over my pussy again, and I inhaled shakingly, nodding as my eyes rolling back slightly.

Cassian's nose nudged my cheek, his low, raspy voice vibrating through me. "Look at me, baby."

Somehow, I managed to force open my heavy lids, and something twisted tight and low in my stomach when my eyes met Cassian’s, blown like he was drunk on more than alcohol, his jaw muscles flexing like he was trying to reign himself in when he made a deep noise low in his throat.

“Need you to tell me.”

The bubbling warmth in my chest rose, and I nodded again, my voice breathy when I whispered: “I’ll tell you.”

Cassian softly sank his teeth into my bottom lip, then he shifted his weight, one of his hands sliding over my thigh, his calloused palm leaving shivers in its wake as it grabbed onto my knee and dragged it higher up his side until my leg slid over his back. His nose nudged against mine, his blurred, feverish eyes piercing mine. Then he rolled his hips forward, and my lips fell apart as I felt his tip push into me and how I clenched around him.

Cassian's body shuddered, his eyes fluttered, and he dropped his head into my neck.

“Fuck.” His deep voice sounded slurred, his back muscles flexing under my hands. His jaw worked as low, broken sounds rose in his throat, and a shaking whimper tore from my lips as my body arched into him.

“I - I don't -“ I squeezed my eyes shut, breathing shakily. “This might take a while.”

Cassian’s lashes fluttered against my cheek, and a low groan broke from his throat as he nuzzled his nose against my jaw, sounding hoarse when he mumbled: “Fuck; yes.”

A soft, startled giggle broke from my throat, and Cass grinned against my skin, my insides twisting at the sight of his hooded, hazy eyes and the crooked line of his smirk. Then he dipped his head and nipped my jaw, softly biting into my neck as he rolled his hips forward, and my eyes rolled, my nails digging into his back.

♡

With a soft groan, I buried my nose in my pillow. Then I slowly blinked open one eye, feeling my nose crunch when the light sent a wave of pain through my head.

Ouch.

Whining softly and squeezing my eyes shut again, I dropped my head and buried my face in my pillow.

Urgh.

For a few seconds, I just laid completely still, feeling a steady pounding set up residence right underneath my skull. Birds chirped softly outside the window, a car passed on the street outside, and I could hear quiet clatter in another room.

My limbs felt heavy when I slowly raised my head again, making a face at the fuzzy taste on my tongue, the general queasiness and the spike of pain in my head as I squinted to take in my surroundings.

I was in my bedroom, stretched out diagonally across the mattress, clinging to my pillow. The gap in the curtains allowed warm rays of sunlight to fall onto the floor, and a cool breeze swayed the fabric. There were pieces of clothing scattered over the floor and the furniture, throw pillows dropped onto the carpet around the bed, my blanket was tangled around my bare legs, and I was wearing nothing but underwear and a too big t-shirt that smelled dark and warm and familiar.

Making a low sound in my throat, I contemplated just burying my head under the pillow and going back to sleep until my head stopped pounding and I didn’t feel like death anymore – but then the smell of something frying wafted into the room, and my stomach twisted and grumbled miserably.

Whining softly, I exhaled deeply. Then I slowly dug myself out of my blanket and slid my legs over the edge of the mattress. My whole body was aching, and wincing at the drumming pain in my head, I pushed myself to my feet, nearly moaning at the soreness of my muscles. Grimacing and tiredly rubbing my eyes, I sluggishly trudged over the carpet and pushed open the half closed door.

The smell of bacon got stronger, and running a hand over my face, I trudged through the small hall, coming to a halt in the door to the kitchen. Squinting into the sunlight, I blinked tiredly, and my heart performed a small, happy hop against my ribs at the sight of the tall guy moving around my small kitchen.

Cassian’s back shifted, muscles flexing under his bare skin as he smoothly flipped a pancake, the soft, concentrated crunch of his brows melting away when he placed the pan back on the stove. Twirling a spatula between his fingers absentmindedly, he looked around before beginning to stir what looked like scrambled eggs in another pan. The golden sunlight falling through the window made his eyes look softer and skin glow warmly, his large body dwarfing my kitchen as he moved around, and something squeezed softly in my stomach as my eyes flickered over his bare torso down to the black boxers peeking out over the waistband of his low hanging joggers.

Cass moved and threw a look over his shoulder, and our gazes met.

For a second, his gaze flickered down my body, and something shifted in his eyes when they seemed to linger on my bare legs. Then Cassian blinked and raised his eyes again, and something pulsed warmly against my ribs when one corner of his lips slowly curved upwards.

“Hey.”

His deep voice, warm and raspy, paired with the teasing twinkle spreading through his eyes sent a gentle tingle down my spine, and breathing out, I reached up to rub my eyes, crunching my nose gently as I mumbled hoarsely: “Hey.”

The scratchiness of my tired voice nearly made me wince, and Cass chuckled softly, dimples forming in his cheeks when he sent me a slow, shit-eating grin.

“You good, baby?”

Something leapt softly against my ribs at the teasing tilt of his voice, and exhaling heavily, I leaned my shoulder against the doorframe and dropped my temple against the cool wood as I stared at him tiredly, feeling my head pound. Then I raised my brows. “I definitely had too much to drink.”

A snort broke from Cassian’s throat, and the wide grin on his face caused something to topple lightly in my chest.

Breathing out, I blinked tiredly. Feeling my brows crunch softly, I stared into space as I tried to separate the blurry strands of memory in my head.

“Did you sleep here?” My hoarse voice sounded as sleepy as I felt as I blinked slowly.

Cassian raised his head, and his eyes flickered over my face.

I winced lightly, squeezing one eye shut as I sent him a crooked, sheepish smile. “I’m – sorry; I just remember that we left that – ridiculously full party last night, everything after is – blurry.”

Cassian’s gaze flickered over mine. Then he blinked, his jaw muscles shifted, and his throat worked gently like he was suppressing the urge to swallow.

Something twinged gently in my chest, and raising my head a little, I felt my brows crunch gently with worry as my eyes moved over his face.

“What?”

Cass blinked again. Then he turned his eyes away, one corner of his lips curving gently as he mumbled: “Forgot you’re a fucking lightweight.”

A soft giggle burst from my throat, and the curve of Cassian’s lips deepend just a little as he let the pancake slide onto a plate that was already filled with other, turning off the stove.

Staring at him and the shadow of a dimple in his cheek that didn’t feel fully him, I felt that soft twinge in my chest twist a little.

I blinked, then I pushed off the doorframe and trudged towards him, rubbing my eyes before sliding my arms around his waist and dropping my head against his chest with a tired, soft sound.

For nothing but a second, I thought I felt Cassian’s back muscles tense under my touch, his warm body seeming to freeze gently. But just was I was about to raise my head, a small breath left him, and I felt his shoulders sink. His hand slid up my back and his arm wrapped over my shoulder, and Cass dropped his head to bury his nose in my hair.

There was a small flutter against my ribs, and exhaling slowly, I slid my arms further around him, then I buried my face in his chest, his bare skin warm against my cheek. My eyes dropped close on their own accord, and just for a few seconds, the pounding in my head faded a little as I soaked in the solid feeling of Cassian’s body towering over mine and the warmth and scent of his skin. Then I raised my head relucantly and with a soft sigh, tiredly staring down at the pans for a second before I tipped my head back to blink up at Cass, feeling my lips curve just a bit as I squinted.

“That for me?”

Cassian’s eyes flickered over my face, and slowly, the smallest trace of a crease appeared in his cheek. Then he crunched his brows, narrowing his eyes a little even as his gaze started twinkling the tiniest bit. “You even hungry?”

My stomach tightened and rumbled, and a slow grin spread over Cassian’s face, causing his eyes to crinkle a little and small dimples to form in his cheeks and warmth to rise in my chest.

Chuckling softly, he slid his arm from my shoulder. “Sit down.”

Squeezing his sides with a tired, happy sound, I breathed out sleepily, dropping my arms from his waist and stepping back to move past him. My heart did a little skip when I saw that the small table at the window was set, glasses with orange juice next to cups and a steaming pot of coffe, another glass with water and painkillers sitting in front of the seat on the small sofa.

Something warm started bubbling in my chest, and feeling a soft smile spread over my face, I crunched my nose to barely suppress a yawn before wriggling past the table and climbing onto the couch.

Pulling the soft blanket over my bare legs and cuddling up in my seat, wrapping my arms around my knees, I tiredly blinked at the set table for a second, feeling the warm bubbling sensation under my ribs swell a little. Then I slowly pulled the glass with water towards me, ripping open one of the packages and dumping the contents into the glass. It started fizzling, turning bubbly and pale, and picking it up and making a face, I quickly chugged down its contents.

The bitter taste made me shudder and smack my lips with a grimace, quickly refilling the glass to rinse the taste out of my mouth and quench the sudden wave of thirst.

Emptying the second glass of water in one go, I barely suppressed a soft burp, and there was a quiet chuckle. Then a plate stacked with pancakes, eggs and bacon was placed in front of me, and when I raised my head, Cassian took the seat on the other side of the table, a soft dimple digging into his cheek.

The greasy smell of bacon rose into my throat, and groaning softly, I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply.

“Thank you.” My voice was still raspy and tired, but the smell of food made some of the queasiness melt away, my mouth watering as I took my cutlery.

Warm silence settled over the kitchen as I started eating, feeling too sleepy and hungover for conversation. The sun tickled my nose and made Cassian’s eyes look like light hazel with flecks of green as he slow sipped his coffee, brows crunched a bit against the light. He didn’t seem in the mood for conversation either and just protested with a soft, dramatic sound when I snuck bacon off his plate, the corners of his lips curving just a little as he played with his fork, hazel eyes watching me.

Polishing off the last bit off pancake and egg, I breathed out happily, most of the queasy feeling gone as I put my cutlery down and blinked tiredly. Now, my stomach full and warm, the ache in my head dulling down to a painful thrum, I felt like curling up on the spot and napping for the next 24 hours.

Though –

Crunching my brows softly, I dropped my head, I carefully sticking my nose into the collar of my shirt and sniffling.

Wincing lightly at the stale smell of alcohol, I slowly raised my head again and blinked tiredly.

“I think I’m gonna take a shower.” Resting my elbow on the table and leaning my cheek against my hand, I sleepily stared at Cassian. Then I mumbled softly: “You okay?”

Cass blinked. His gaze slowly moved over my face, and his throat worked slightly. Then he dropped his head, the shadow of a crease forming in his cheeks when he nodded.

“Yeah.” His quiet, raspy voice sent a warm tingle down my spine as he looked up again, watching me, and I stared back at him, my lids fighting to close, the sun warming my skin.

“You sure?” My words were soft, quiet.

One corner of Cassian’s lips curved, and he leaned forward until he could rest his chin on his arms, staring up at me. “You know, showering sounds like a good idea. You’re kinda stinky.”

Warmth swelled in my chest, and without changing my position, I picked up a piece of packaging and tossed it across the table. A soft giggle burst from my throat when it hit Cassian’s forehead, and Cass crunched his brows and whined softly, dimples digging into his cheeks and eyes twinkling softly in the light.

Feeling happiness bubble gently against my ribs, I stared at him with a tired, crooked smile. Then I got up slowly with a sigh, grumbling dramatically under my breath as I climbed off the couch.

Cass straightened, throwing the piece of paper onto his plate, and sluggishly squeezing past the table, I leaned down and wrapped my arms around his neck from the side in a tight hug, leaning my chin against his head and closing my eyes tiredly.

Cassian’s hand rose to wrap around my forearm, his thumb slowly brushing over my skin, and feeling warmth rise in my chest, I dropped my nose to bury it in his hair. Then I pressed a long, dramatic kiss onto his temple and slowly straightened up again, squeezing his shoulder. Cass looked back at me, his palm wrapping over my hand for a moment, and sending him a soft, crooked grin, I gently flicked his forehead. Then I turned around, sighing tiredly and rubbing my eyes.

Taking a detour to the bedroom to get fresh clothes, I trudged into the bathroom, closing the door behind me. The warmth of the sun and my full belly made me feel even more tired than before, and I barely managed to keep my eyes open as I stripped out of my clothes, dropping them carelessly to the floor before stepping into the shower and turning on the water.

My lids slid shut, and I allowed them to as I slowly scrubbed myself clean, letting hot water run over my face and down my back. The steady sound nearly made me doze off on my feet, and somehow pulling myself together, I turned off the water and stepped out onto the small matt, reaching for my towel.

Wrapping myself up, I stayed motionless in the same spot for a second with half closed eyes, dripping quietly, listening to the sound of a bee buzzing against the window.

A light knock against the door made me startle, and Cassian’s low, deep voice travelled through the door.

“Hey, you still awake?”

I blinked slowly. Then I mumbled, softly and hoarsely: “Fuck off.”

There was a muffled chuckle that sent a warm tingle down my spine, and I could almost see the way Cassian leaned his shoulder against the doorframe, dipping his head towards the door with a light grin.

“I used up the rest of your groceries, your fridge’s a fucking wasteland now; I’ll go down to the store and get you some shit for the weekend.” His deep voice vibrated over my skin even muffled by the door. “You want anything special or just the usual?”

Breathing out, I leaned my hip against the counter and blinked tiredly, my voice still rasping a little when I mumbled: “You staying?”

Cass was quiet for nothing but a second. Then his warm, raspy voice echoed softly through the door.

“Yeah.” The hum of his low, deep voice sent warm shivers over my skin when he added: “If you want me to.”

“Duh”, I muttered tiredly, my voice sounding a little less scratchy when I crunched my brows. “You always do. It’s tradition now.”

Cass huffed a deep laugh, and I felt my lips curve as I blinked slowly, my eyelids drooping. “Just get the usual. If I don’t feel like death tonight, I’ll make pasta, so – you just pick whatever you want for a sauce, and – get snacks. Lots of ‘em.”

Cassian chuckled, and warmth bubbled gently against my ribs. “Got it.” He lightly rapped his knuckles against the door. “Don’t fall asleep until I’m back, okay?”

I felt a slow, wide smile spread over my face.

“No promises,”, I mumbled with half-closed eyes, and Cass breathed another low laugh, then he pushed off the doorframe, the floor creaking. Warmth gently fluttered against my ribs, and breathing out, I slowly pushed myself off the counter as the front door fell shut.

Somehow, I managed to dry off and get myself into my underwear and a soft bra, even after giving up the fight against my heavy eyelids. Then I blindly grabbed my bodylotion from the shelf and forced my eyes to open dramatically as I turned around.

Just this and brushing my teeth and maybe sorting my hair and then I could go back to be-

My gaze found the mirror over the sink, and my breath caught in my throat.

The bottle of bodylotion slipped from my fingers and hit the tiled floor, and my lips parted as I stared at mirror and the dark bruises littering my chest, ribs and the side of my neck.

My heart thrummed once against my ribs, and memories crashed over me like a tidal wave.

Of heated, messy kisses and large hands wrapping around my limbs, turning and sliding my body into positions that had made my back arch, of lips dragging over my skin and teeth softly sinking into my ribs, of sweaty skin sliding together, my eyes rolling back into my head and a warm, massive body hovering over mine, husky curses rasped into my skin and fingers tangling with mine in the sheets.

Shit.

I stared into the mirror as my cheeks paled and my chest squeezed.

Shit, shit, shit.

@azrielshadows1nger @waytoomanyteenagefeels @secretlyhers @icey--stars @ailyr92

[hellosmuttydarling]

Shower Time

Summary: Walking into the wrong place, at the wrong time, seems to work out in your and Rooster's favor. In which, some private time in the shower turns into something far better.

Warnings: Smut, masturbation, oral sex, fantasizing. MINORS DNI.

Rooster wiped the sweat off his face with his towel as he entered the locker room. He could hear the shower running already and realized with a small flash of annoyance that it would mean he'd have to wait. He sat on the bench next to his locker and was about to pop in his headphones when he heard a sound.

A moan, to be exact. Rooster froze as he heard another one coming from the direction of the showers. When he stopped and listened, he realized that it was definitely a moan and a very distinct moan of pleasure. Only one person could be in that shower right now, making sounds like that.

You. Something had been between you two since you'd met on the first day of training; chemistry mixed with the competitiveness of the training made for a very frustrating relationship, but he couldn't help but be attracted to you. You were gorgeous and a great pilot but beyond infuriating.

The next moan left no doubt of what you were doing in there, and he could feel the heat washing over his body, his dick already hardening in his athletic shorts. His hands gripped the bench so hard that his knuckles turned white, and with each succeeding sound you made, all he could think about was how badly he wanted to walk over there.

"Bradley…" the moan was quiet and breathless. If he hadn't had all of his focus on what was going on over in that shower, he might have missed it. His decision was made instantly; he stood up, dropping his things onto the bench and peeling his shirt off before he stalked over to the shower.

The sight of you simultaneously took his breath away and also turned him into a man possessed; there was no way he was leaving this shower without fucking you senseless. You were standing there, naked and soaking wet, the water from the shower pouring down your body, following all of your curves, with your legs slightly spread and your hand in between them, circling your clit with your thumb as you fucked yourself with your fingers.

You were oblivious to the fact that Rooster was even there. The tension and flirting from the last week and a half had driven you crazy all night till you found yourself at the gym on base at 5:30 am, trying desperately to let off some steam. It almost worked until Bradley Bradshaw, of all people, walked in and, before long, was glistening with sweat, his breath coming out in hard, short bursts. All you could think about was seeing him like this but in a completely different setting, with far fewer clothes, and instead of lifting weights, he'd be lifting you.

It became too much when paired with the heated looks between you two, so you bailed back to the locker room, planning on taking a very long, icy cold shower before training.

You didn't know how you ended up here, getting yourself off to the same dirty thoughts you'd had while watching him work out. You did know two things: First, you desperately needed a release, and second, you were almost there.

Your fingers were delving in and out of your folds, your other hand playing with your breasts, when the voice you last expected to hear came from way too close, and your eyes snapped open.

"Want some help with that, honey?"

Fuck.

There was no use in covering up; you knew he'd already seen your entire naked body and that he'd seen what you were just doing. He'd almost certainly heard you moaning his name, too.

Fuuuuuuck.

"You could have at least let me cum before interrupting me, Bradshaw." You did your best to sound nonchalant, and luckily, your face was already flushed, so he wouldn't be able to see the heat of embarrassment rising to your cheeks.

"Bradshaw, huh? Just a second ago, it was Bradley." He sauntered over to you, and you looked him up and down, taking in his incredibly delicious shirtless form.

"I'd call you Bradley again if you hadn't just ruined my orgasm." He finally reached you, stepped into your personal space, and backed you up until you were pressed against the cold tile of the shower. One of his hands came up to rest on the wall next to your head, and the other came to rest on your bare hip, his thumb rubbing circles into your skin. Your traitorous, dirty mind sending thoughts of what that would feel like somewhere else.

"I'm sorry. How about I make it up to you?" He'd leaned down so that your lips were a breath away from meeting his.

"And how are you planning to do that?"

"I'll show you right now if you'll let me." Bradley was ever the gentleman.

You didn't say anything in response, answering instead by pulling him in for a heated kiss. Kissing him was everything you'd hoped and dreamed it would be. He was a phenomenal kisser, clearly experienced, and while you hated to admit it, clearly dominated you in every delicious aspect.

There was no point in wasting time when he already knew you'd been about to cum at the thought of him. The hand on your hip quickly moved to your thigh to lift your leg and hook it around his hip so he could be closer to you.

You could feel how hard he was, even through the shorts he was still wearing; his cock was pressed against your stomach. You trailed your hand down his chest to his stomach, dipping just slightly underneath the waistband, enough to tease him just a little bit. His abs contracted under your touch, and his fists clenched at his sides. What little clothes he wore were quickly getting drenched under the shower spray, but he didn't seem to care at all.

You broke apart for air, and he immediately went for your neck, kissing and biting his way down; you moaned as he got to just the right spot. Hearing your reaction, he doubled down with a hard suck, sure to leave a bruise, but at that moment, you didn't care.

Your hand went into his shorts, grasping his dick firmly, and marveled at the size. You couldn't see it, but fuck could you feel it, and goddamn, did you want it inside you. His head dropped to your shoulder as you started to pump his length with your hand, a quiet groan escaping him.

"Fuck," It took all his willpower to stop you, pulling your hand away from him. "I believe I owe you something."

"Yes, you do." Before you could blink, he dropped to his knees in front of you, pulling your thigh up over his shoulder and slowly kissing his way up your thigh.

"What were you picturing? When you moaned my name?" He said as he inched higher, his positively sinful brown eyes locked on yours. Had his eyes always been this dark?

"Not this," he bit down lightly at the most sensitive part of your inner thigh. "You, inside me. My legs were on your shoulders as you fucked me against the wall, hard."

As a reward for answering his question, he finally moved right where you wanted him. He used his hand to separate your folds, and then his mouth was on your clit, his tongue starting slowly and softly before starting to work up his rhythm.

You were a mess of moaning and pleading. Rooster ate you out like a fucking professional, listening to every intake of breath and every moan, having quickly learned what you liked and how to use it to get you undone, and fast.

"Holy fuck," Soon, two of his fingers joined his efforts, delving inside you, matching the pace of his tongue. "Goddamn, Bradley…"

You knew there was no way you would last like this, not with how amazing he was making your body feel. You were practically seeing stars and were begging him not to stop. A true testament to his experience, he didn't slow down or speed up, knowing how close you were. He maintained the speed and rhythm that was already driving you crazy.

"Bradley… I'm going to cum…" You looked down at him, kneeling in front of you, leg thrown over his shoulder, dark eyes locked on yours, as he ate you out like he was on a fucking mission. The sight alone had you starting to fall over the edge, but when his fingers curled and hit just the right spot, you plummeted head-first into her orgasm. "Fuck!"

Another testament to his experience, he knew exactly what to do to prolong your orgasm without ruining it, leaving you a shaking, moaning mess. Soon, though, your flesh became far too sensitive, and you pulled him up to kiss him. You could taste yourself on his lips, on his mustache. You'd never been a big mustache girl, but on him, you loved it.

"Please tell me that you're going to fuck me now," you all but whined when you pulled apart. The answering smirk on his face promised delightful things.

"Your wish is my command," He pushed his shorts and underwear down his legs and kicked them to the side, and you finally got your first look at his hard cock. You thought it was big before when you'd felt it, but now you could see that it was huge, and for a second, you worried it might not even fit, but you decided that you didn't care. "Come here."

You obliged, wrapping your arms around his neck as he brought your lips back together and picked you up in one fluid motion. Your legs wrapped around his waist on instinct, and from the new position, you could feel the tip of his dick rubbing against you, and all you could think about was that you needed more. He pushed you back into the wall before pausing to look at you.

"Are you sure?" You both knew that after this, there would be no going back to how it used to be.

"Yes." It was all the confirmation he needed, pushing into you gently but firmly. You couldn't help but gasp at the intrusion, feeling mildly like you were being split in half, but it was both slightly painful and exquisite because you had never felt this full before. Your gasp was met with a deep moan from Rooster as he seated himself to the hilt.

"You're so fucking tight," He gave you a second to adjust, and when you nodded, he withdrew almost completely, just to bury himself nice and deep. He swallowed your moan with a kiss, your tongues battling for dominance as he fucked you slowly.

Soon that familiar pressure was building up slowly in your body, and you knew that when you came, you were going to cum hard.

"Hold on to me." You nodded, not able to form words as he shifted your legs from his waist to having the crook of your knees slung over his elbows, changing the angle and allowing him even deeper. With his next thrust, you almost screamed but managed to choke it down.

In this new position, he set a grueling pace, fucking you hard and fast, with you doing your damnedest to not be too loud, but the way he was fucking you made that incredibly difficult. You were getting so close to reaching that peak again when the door to the locker room opened and slammed shut. 

The two of you froze instantly, not wanting to be caught in a more than compromised position but unable to separate without making quite a bit of noise. You could make out a few muffled voices belonging to some of your squadmates but had no idea what they were saying. Someone must have noticed Rooster's things on the bench because soon they called out to him.

"Rooster? That you?" Fanboy called from far too close for comfort. The only bit of luck that seemed to be on your side was that even if one of them came into the showers, they wouldn't see any part of you besides your arms and legs, as opposed to the unobstructed view they'd have of Rooster's incredible ass and chiseled back.

"Yeah." His dick was still hard and practically pulsing inside you. Your brain and body were currently fighting a desperate battle over wanting to finish what they'd started but not wanting to be caught fucking on base, in the locker room, right before training.

"We're going to grab breakfast. Are you in?"

"Yeah, I'll, uh, meet you there."

"Sounds good." The voices drift further away, and you both hear the door again open and shut. Your head fell onto his shoulder, and you released the breath you'd held.

"It is, apparently, not my morning." You said against his skin, and he responded with a dry chuckle.

"Not mine, either." You gasped slightly as he gently pulled out and set you back on solid ground. You pulled away from him and took in his face for a second, the tensing in his jaw and darkened eyes. He was the picture of annoyance, and you were positive your face mirrored his.

"I'm going to get out of here before we risk being discovered, for real this time," you leaned up and kissed him one last time, purposefully keeping it short, not wanting to be any more sexually frustrated than you already were. "Come find me later?"

"You got it, honey." You rinsed off and headed out of the shower, ignoring every part of you that wanted to say fuck it and turn around.

[hazbinhotelxreader]

Lucifer x female reader smut

Words:627

“You got something on your face..”

A/n: I hope this was okay, cause I’m not good either males 😭! But sorry that it took so long, I had school and I’ll be posting more on the weekends sorry that this took a while and sorry it’s not as long!!

(Requested by Alex_Suckz on AO3)

Warning: submissive Lucifer, blowjobs, female dominate, size difference, age difference,(both characters adults), praise, soft sex, hair pulling

Your horny ass boyfriend, Lucifer, was trying his best not to get turned on. I mean he hasn’t had sex in thousands of years, so of course he’s going to want to have it with you now. You didn’t mind though, you get to fuck the ruler of hell.

You both were making out on the couch, you on his lap, you could feel his member harden with arousal. “Horny?” You ask blunt, teasing him while smirking.

He blushed lightly and nodded, looking down as he grinded his hips against yours more. He let out a deep moan and held onto your shoulders..”yes..”. You chuckled under your breath, he seriously wasn’t about to cum with just some grinding was he?

“Let me help.” You offer and push him off of your lap, making your way down onto the ground beneath you two. You get on your knees in between his thighs, taking his pants off as he sighed in relief, his body relaxing on the couch while he watched your every move.

He bit his bottom lip, his white skin forming a pink blush on her face as he looked down at you. Once you pulled his pants down your breath hitched and your eyes widened. He may be a short guy, but he has a large cock, which was throbbing and waiting to be inside something.

Your breath hits his large member, causing him to squirm under your breath. Your delicate fingers wrap around his large veiny member, your head pulling closer to it. You take your time with him, even if you know how much he’s been begging for release. Your warm tongue licked the tip of his member gently and slowly. He lets out a moan, already more turned on.

His hands held onto the couch, trying his best not to thrust into your mouth or grab your head. You close your eyes and slowly inch your mouth deeper and deeper onto his cock,moaning in the process as his large cock fills your mouth and hitting the back of your throat, making you gag in response.

“Oh fuuuuuuck…” he groaned and put a gentle hand on the back of your head, his fingers carefully intertwined with your hair. You let out a moan when his fingers gripped your hair, you start to bob your head up and down with your eyes closed, sucking and using your skilled tongue to roll over his cock. “Ohh that’s it…so..so good..yes!…keep going…” he moaned out and threw his head back. Loving the attention from your skilled mouth.

You could feel his cock pulsing in your mouth, close to his climax. You suck his cock harder, licking and making sure every surface of his cock doesn’t go untouched. He moaned more, his moans becoming more whiny as he started to buck his hips into your face, now desiring the release he hasn’t had in years. “Yes! Please…keep going I’m so close..” he groaned and bucked his hips.

You gag as his cock hits the back of your mouth over and over again, but you keep sucking, wanting to make him feel the pleasure and love he’s been wanting and missing. He cries out you name, eyes rolling back, his warm white seed filling up your mouth and slipping down your throat. You try your best to swallow it all but some manages to drip down your chin.

Lucifer looks back down at you with a breathy chuckle and pulls you up, kissing your lips, tasting himself and cleaning the cum off your face. “You got something on your face..”

[powermove102]

1888 is the FUNNIEST Dark era for me.

First up, you've got Jonas appearing out of nowhere, middle-aged, after being missing for half a year, and he's all like 'leave your damn families, *I'm* gonna save you xx', before plonking them all off in said 1888, which I can only imagine going down with a 'Where are we, Jonas?' '.... fuuuuuuck....'

Then the previously discussed 'how do you do, fellow kids?' energy because he is *50 years old* and they are *not*, paired with the fact that he is likely awkward as FUCK since they don't have much to talk about anymore (and this man is socially deprived, he only gets to chat to someone about the loop every once in a while).

And the building resentment. Oooooooooo do we like some yummy tension within the group, because they can't really trust him, he feels he's failed them but is still determined to save them whist STILL resisting Adam-ification. Juicy, I tell you.

Also what are they doing all day. Literally. Jonas I assume spends most of his time tweaking the machine but like? What else? What do the others do? It's so damn hilarious how bored and annoyed out of their minds they must be that they (at least Magnus) WISHED the apocalypse had nuked them too.

[curvykittyyssmutfics]

Hush ft. Gojo (part 2)

"Startin to think you're real selfish, know that? Pretty y/e/c eyes cryin on my shirt while your desperate lil puss cries all over my cock. Only care if I make you cum, huh? Mmmm.. But what about me, y/n?"

Satoru slowly slides out, amused when you whine in despair at the emptiness. Shakes his head at your horny ass grabbin your breast, pinching your nipples through your uniform shirt. He tsks before finally givin you some mercy- as well as a deep ass penetrating stroke. "Fuuuuuuck!" It's gut wrenchingly swift and deep, has you falling back against his desk as you cum with a wail of his name. Clutchin pitifully at his shirt, snatchin him down on top of you. Satoru watches in absolute disbelief as you seizure under him from.. One. Fucking. Thrust. "The fuck woman?" Tries covering your open mouth with his palm but he can barely muffle your delirious wordless shrieks. "Hush, y/n!" His own nut now simmers on the surface at your hysterical antics. So Satoru places his hands on either side of your head and gives you another pussy murdering stroke. The arch your back snaps into honestly looks like it hurts to him. "Oh God, Saaatoruuu! Dick so fuckin good.. Love it so much, baby! Love you too.. Love you so so much!" He breathes through his nose sharply at your admission while your insides crush his pulsating cock. You gush his lower half, juices splattering audibly against his pants. That's all she wrote for Saturo. "Calm down, woman! Hoooh shit.. Pussy won't stop milkin my shit!" His head snaps back, damp sweaty strands of his snow white locks fall into his face as thick ribbons of cum splash the inside of your quivering lil puss. "Fuuuuuck! Love you too, honey. Mmm.. Ohhhh! Love you more than you know.. So goddamn much, y/n." He leans foward pressin in deep. Low groans squeezin out through his clenched teeth as he stares at the ceiling unseeing. Another stream shoots out, then another. Satoru gives up on quieting your moans, hands balling to fist on each side of your head at the intense sensation of his never-ending nut. Piercing eyes crossed from you buck underneath him, pussy attempting to suck and wring him dry. He's so preoccupied with listening to your pitchy keens, and draining his load inside you, he fails to notice the absence of voices comin through the walls. Or the shadows outside his office door. Misses Yuuji furiously stomping away when he hears you moan like a pornstar, Megumi and Maki joggin to catch up. Satoru only starts to see straight when you push at his shoulder, signalling his weight bein too much. He leans back, dick sliding out to the tip, still enjoying the clutch of your snug, wet warmth. His head lazily falls forward as he looks back to your disoriented eyes, notices the light perspiration dusting your pretty face. "Still love me?" The fuckin jerk smirks when you flutter around his dick, averting your gaze as you shuffle nervously with shame beneath his sturdy frame. You're tryin to catch your breath; need a moment to collect yourself, already feeling tired from the force of your orgasm. "Please be quiet, Gojo. Damn.. Ass always got somethin to say." Satoru raises a perfect white brow at you. "Comin from the woman that can't keep her mouth shut to save her fuckin life!" You slap at him but just ending up moaning loud and long as he pins each wrist and slowly slides his hard dick back in to the hilt. "Let's see how quiet you can be this time, y/n."

[missacidburn928s-heathenhideaway]

YWFLBWHESTS Drabble

Wordcount: 983

Summary:

Indie Rocker!Eddie Munson x POC!Indie Rocker!Reader “Sug” x Fuckboy!Steve Harrington Early 2000s Indie Rockstar AU A glimpse into your future with Eddie and Steve.

Warnings: 18+ Only

Smutty smut smut. BDSM. There really isnt much of a plot here. Read at your own risk.

Notes:

I couldn't help myself. This just wouldn't leave my brain. So here ya go. Happy Reading Heathens 😈

Banner by @cafekitsune

It’s Hellfire night and Eddie has finally made it home. He knew Steve was over, keeping you company while he did his Dungeon Master thing. Upon walking through the front door he was surprised to find the living room empty.

That is, until a moan comes from down the hall in the bedroom.

Taking his sneakers off. He places them on the metal shoe rack and follows the sensual noise. What he finds has his mouth watering.

Steve has you bent over the dresser. Your underwear drawer left open. Spilling tiny lace and cloth onto the floor as he pounds into you from behind.

"Why on earth did you think I would be okay with you putting panties back on sweetheart, when I ripped the last pair off? Nothing should ever be keeping us from sinking into your tight cunt." Steve questions you.

"I'm sorry." You squeak out.

"Sorry what?" He punctuates with a hard thrust and a slap to your ass.

"Sorry…daddy" You cry out.

Eddie groans from the doorway. Letting his presence be known, as he palms his erection through his jeans.

"Look who's finally home." Steve coos.

You whine. Melting further into the dresser, knowing Eddie is watching you get punished for the small slight.

"You trying to keep that sweet pussy from your Daddy Bunny?" He teases.

"No, Sir." You shake your head. Moaning as Steve gives a particularly hard thrust. "Was trying to keep it safe?"

"Keep what safe Bunny?"

"Daddys cum." You gasp out. "There was so much it was just leaking out of me, and I didn’t want to waste it. Knew you would want a snack when you got home. I just wanted to keep it safe and warm for you." You sob, unable to control your emotions any longer.

"Fuuuuuuck." Steve groans. "That's why you were in here grabbing panties? Wanted to keep all of Daddy’s cum for Sir?"

"Mmhmm." You whimper.

"Fuck baby girl. Now I feel like a jackass for punishing you." He slows his thrusts.

"No don’t stop! Please!" Tears continue streaming down your face.

"Shhh. I'm not stopping baby." He continues his slow grind into your body as he turns to watch as Eddie steps into the room. "Since you were trying to be a good girl for your Sir and got punished by me instead. I’m going to let you come on my cock. Then I’m going to fill you back up so Sir can feast on your sweet little abused hole. What do you think Eds?”

He saunters over to your slumped frame. Wiping a tear from your cheek. “I think that’s a great idea, but it’s missing something?”

“What's that?” You whisper out.

“My dick in your mouth.” He grins. “Gotta make sure my little Bunny’s belly is full before I fill mine.”

You whine and start to frantically nod your head yes. “Please. Want your cum Sir. Please.”

“Shh. Shh. I got you.” He quickly unzips his jeans. Pulling out his ridiculously hard dick. “Open up Bunny.”

You open your mouth as wide as it will go. And damn are you a sight to behold. Eyes glazed over and dilated. Tears dampening your cheeks. Hair a mess from the manhandling Steve put you through.

Eddie could come just from the image alone. But he promised his Bunny he’d fill her belly and he can’t go back on his word. Not when you’ve already been unfairly punished. A sub-drop will not be happening on his watch.

He places his leaking tip on your tongue. Before he can even instruct you, you’ve wrapped your lips around his shaft and you’re sucking him down into your throat.

He throws his head back “Fuck, Bunny. That mouth is dangerous. Got me on the edge of coming already.”

Steve groans and speeds up his hips. “I’m not going to last much longer myself. Her pussy is squeezing the hell out of me. I can barely pull out.”

“You heard him, Bunny. You better hurry up and cum so we can give you your overdo reward.”

You moan around Eddie’s girth as Steve doubles his efforts. Bringing is hand around your hip and sliding his fingers down to your clit. Rubbing your engorged button until you’re coming undone with a muffled scream.

“That’s it, Bunny. Bring your Daddy to his knees for punishing you when you were just being my best girl.”

“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.” Steve grits out. Hips slamming home and stilling as he unloads deep inside of you.

“Good girl.” Eddie caresses your cheek. “Ready for you treat bunny?”

You nod your head. Relaxing your throat so that he can fuck your mouth like you so desperately want.

He pulls his hips back and pushes forward. Creating a rhythm he knows will have him painting your tonsils white in no time.

Just as he is about to crest off the edge into pure ecstasy, he feels arms wrap around his torso and lips kiss along his neck to his ear. “Look at you baby boy, helping Daddy fix his mistake. Giving your little bunny just what she needs.”

“Oh fuck. Here it comes Bunny.” Steve’s words echo in his ears as Eddie erupts along your tongue.

You remain still until his cock twitches for the last time. He gently removes himself from your mouth and watches as you once again open it wide. Showing off all his sweet cream collected on your tongue before you swallow every last drop.

He bends down and captures your lips with his own. “Mmm. My good girl.”

Your eyes roll back at the praise.

Steve smacks Eddie on the ass. “You better eat your snack before it gets cold baby boy. Get your fill because the rest of the night we’re going to spoil our very good girl.”

Eddie moves to lower himself to his knees behind your still bent over frame. “With pleasure.”

[annabelle-creart]

TF KINKTOBER 2024 DAY #17: Valve Worship || Masochism

CW: dom/sub. Oral. Sticky interfacing. Bites and scratches. I've never writed masochism before👍 I'm not sure why to do so this time

Ship: BoulWave

Au: Shattered Glass

Part 2 of Day 15

Lil context before: after the... event of day 15 (and finding out their unresolved tension) Boulder and Heatwave made a deal, no compromises, no romance, and at least both would have what they wanted

--

“Fuuuuuuck” Heatwave let out, long and deep as the feeling on his calipers which started to get aroused thanks to a pair of fingers

"Are you already that hot?" Boulder asked as soft as they could, which was everything except soft, a bite of dominant, a lick of joking, caressing Heatwave's cheekplate, this kind of stuff was weird for both of them, but the strange face Heatwave made for it made Boulder feel a little better "what a hot-head I have under me"

"Pretty much, and I'm also hard to stop" Heatwave chuckled with picardy, despite having two servos tied away and completely lay down at the berth. It was no surprise, all at the station already knew Heatwave had a bad relationship with authority, that includes this kind of 'play'

"You're being more irritating than usual"

"Try me" Heatwave reply at Boulder's yell, in response, Boulder took Heatwave's neck with their servo, steady, just squeezing enough to know it was doing so

"How I would like to have something to make you shut the fuck up"

"You're not that chatty, I got it" Heatwave joked at Boulder's pressure, feeling the servo getting thigher

"Don't make me regret this weird deal of you"

"You accepted it, is also your fault"

Boulder genuiely wanted to reply to that, but Heatwave was right, nonetheless

"Ah, I finally got you-" Heatwave wanted to joke again, but a knee-kick on the clutch made him shut up, making him miss the servo that was there just a moment ago

"You really like to screw thing up"

"It is my special power"

"Ahg, how I-"

Wait, Boulder had an idea

"What?"

"Can't you shut up?"

"Make me" Heatwave gave the bot a weird smile, full of picardy

But fortunately for Boulder, that was what they wanted to hear

Still with Heatwave on one servo, Boulder pulled him from the neck, opening their own clutch, handing him as a human with a puppy by the back of the neck. Heatwave understood the task and got Boulder's spike inside his mouth, first licking, surrounding it with his long glossa (not as long as Blades but a bit longer than average), Boulder supported on one servo to recline the head to back, moaning softly at the warm, slipery mouth

"Do you like that?" Heatwave asked softly, but because he had to stop for it, Boulder pushed him back to their spike to let him know he wasn't done yet

After a moment, Boulder raised Heatwave again so, they wouldn't overload so fast, Boulder let go Heatwave's neck for a moment to change his position, but inmediatly, Heatwave launched himself to the spike, what made Boulder had to take him strong and steady by both the neck and the tied servos

"What were you doing?" Boulder asked with fierce, Heatwave only replied with a relaxed smile, what made Boulder throw him back at the position of the beginning "you don't know how to behave, not even under your own terms" Boulder yelled at him with an irritated look

"That's the best part" Heatwave tried to caress Boulder with his leg, but Boulder took it apart by holding it against the berth as strong as could

"I'm not even sure what to do with you now"

"Hit me, choke me, use me as you want" Heatwave's voice box seemed to get deeper, saying it like an offer, Boulder was in part puzzled, but never surprised

"Use you..."

"Yes" Heatwave said, just before Boulder nailed a pair of claws on Heatwave's leg (only enough to dent him a bit) and tried to use the other servo to take Heatwave's servos away

"Why are you resisting then?!"

"Because then it is not fun!"

Heatwave blocked Boulder's faceplate with his tied servos and used his free leg to tease Boulder behind while showing a devilish smile, in response, Boulder bited one of Heatwave's arms to neutralize both and used their free servo to keep the other leg array

Heatwave of course yelled at the bite (but deep on his processor, something made the click is usually does while being aroused), Boulder has really good dentae, but because they couldn't do more in that position, Boulder pressed themselves against one of Heatwave's legs, and now with a free servo directed to their mouth, used the tied arms to push Heatwave to meet their optics, getting both the tied arms to behind their neck and keeping Heatwave hold still by the neck, thigh as the beginning

"Do you have something for me?" Heatwave joked, now with less movement than before, Boulder pressed more their fingers, striking the back of Heatwave's neck with the claws

"Why are you still talking?"

"Don't you like it?" Both looked each other deep on the optic, until Boulder changed the direction of their gaze to the metal on their claws

Boulder licked part of Heatwave's neck, and as expected, Heatwave was too aroused to not to let out a soft moan, Boulder started to lick more

"You're a softie, you know?" Heatwave joked, just before Boulder lowered their servo to Heatwave's back-end and bited his neck even stronger than before, Heatwave cried and tried to get away in instinct, but Boulder only made the grip stronger, scratching Heatwave's back to keep him array. When Heatwave tried to raise his arms, Boulder took their servo from Heatwave's back to pressed them again on their initial position, noticing it had left a dent when Boulder took their servo again to Heatwave's back to keep him close, never stop biting and scratching again

Heatwave, despite the nerve that told him to do something, listened to the tickled that wanted more and let himself being trapped, the sharp pain of the scatch remembered him of being penetrated, and the bites on the neck were just better than a simple kiss on it, to be held so close and the pressure of the grip made Heatwave's energon flow go faster, everything on the air even smelled different, Heatwave's calipers moved in ausence of something to fill it, but feeling an erected member being scrubbed near his clutch, but too far away from his valve

"Boulder-"

"I'm not done" Boulder took Heatwave's back neck and pulled it behind, leaving it completely exposed, which Boulder used as if wanted to eat him alive, Heatwave cried again, both of pain and pleasure, feeling the need of contract his leg but Boulder, holding it steady, only tighened the grip more, Heatwave cried more, like begging, but Boulder wasn't paying attention to know if he wanted to stop or make it harder, Boulder didn't cared enough though and continued with their way, making Heatwave cry enough high to finally understand what was he meaning

"Please-Boulder! FUCK- FUCK ME ALREADY!"

Boulder got their dentae far from Heatwave with a final suck "are you crying?" Boulder noticed, giving him an unusual grin "do you want more?"

"Yes!" Heatwave almost begged

"Pff-" Boulder again took their servo to Heatwave's neck and pushed him to the berth, but this time felt more like a choke "fucking slut"

"Thanks" But this time the voice box sound different

"You like that?" Boulder set free one leg only to take their servo on Heatwave's valve, which was already wet and made Heatwave let out a moan "to be called a slut?" Boulder pulled Heatwave's node and rub it against their fingers "or do you prefer whore? Is rude like you" Heatwave moaned loudly, this time not replying "finally! I had to treat you like a bitch for you to shut up" Boulder pulled up a bit more the node before inserting their spike on Heatwave like a punch on, and not done with it, started to move inside fast and hard, going as deep as could and pressing more their servo on Heatwave's neck

Meanwhile, Heatwave only couldn't moan because the air wasn't enough for it, but his engines purred so loud that it was a replacement

"I could use you forever for this!" Boulder tried to keep the track of the conversation, but their engines were also going too fast for it, and their moans were as worst as Heatwave's

For a moment, none of them knew what hurted more, the constant spanking of clutchs or the entire positions, but the pain made it even hotter, feeling finally the terrible but exciting feeling of the energon flow on their clutches, also, the typical tickle on the low part that always appeared when they were actually enjoying it

"Fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck!" Boulder said repeatidly like trying to ease the feeling, going faster than ever and deeper than usual, until the final wave hit them both, like a tickle finally being scratched, but ten times better

Boulder released Heatwave completely, including his valve, and laid down aside Heatwave, and he, when the adrenaline and pleasure melted, felt completely all what Boulder did, including a hit on the head he forgot that happened at the very beginning of the night, leaving only lots of ache

"What the hell was that?" Heatwave asked, teasing, but his vents were too much time hardened that it sounded awfull

Boulder wanted to say something, but prefered to roll their optics and rest a bit

---

Bonus for something I found funny on Tumblr

[v8mpstamp]

I NEED A PART TWO TO THE POLAROID FIC WHERE STEVE HAS ANOTHER POLAROID OF READER but this time she’s getting herself off in the picture

Ask and you shall receive

I switched it up a little and made them (temp) exes

Warnings: Strong description of male masturbation, slight description of female reader masturbation and picture of reader.

Word count: 600

Masterlist

Polaroid part 1

Days apart

Steve and you have been broken up for a total of 3 days, Steve was sure you guys would be back together again and all in the world would be well, but it’s been radio silence from you, and Steve found himself left home alone in his empty house again. But this time he couldn’t muster up the courage to call you up again and fix things, so he’s left sitting in his desk chair. He would be lying to himself if he said he didn’t feel the way his cock has been missing you, threatening to jump out of his jeans and crawl to you.

He can’t take it anymore and eventually he digs through his drawer and pulls out an old magazine worn at the edges and begins to flip through the pages till he finds something he likes, or, at least something to help get his mind off of you.

Amidst the flipping he spots between another two pages, a single stray polaroid of you, he pauses and grabs it, discarding the magazine to the floor, brining the polaroid closer so he can evaluate it.

He scans the polaroid, noticing how your back is to your pillows and how you angled the camera just right so it shows between your legs, two of your own fingers inserted deep into your cunt, your pink lips open slightly in a moan.

Steve’s face flushes red and his eyes widen a little as if the item in his hand was a long lost treasure.

Shit- to him it was.

Steve’s grip on the polaroid tightens and he removes his pants and boxers with one hand, and holds the picture with the other, he kicks his pants and boxers off his legs and slowly frees his heavy cock. The tension was so built up, that there is precum already coating his tip, he uses that as lubricant and slowly slides his palm all the way down his shaft. He leaned his head back, a low groan escaping his lips as if it were almost painful for him.

“Fuuuuuuck” he says, the word stretching out as if it would ease the moment’s intensity. A shuddering breath escaping his lips afterwards.

He pumps his cock again, squeezing slightly when he reaches the base of his tip, only to drag his palm back down and up again creating a rhythm.

He takes in the polaroid more, his eyes meet your slightly open mouth and in his euphoria he swears he can almost hear your soft moans and whimpers of his name, he can hear the echo of the sweet wet sounds your pussy makes as it takes your fingers in and out, he imagines how good it would feel for his cock to replace your fingers and fuck into your perfect pussy instead. And he knows with these thoughts, he won’t last much longer.

As he picks up the pace his moans fall out in a rhythmic pattern, each one rising and falling with his breaths. His large bicep flexes with each thrust and his back pushes into the chair.

He takes in the photo even more, thrusting to the thought of you touching yourself to him like he’s doing to you right now. How you went out of your way to place a photo like this in his room without him knowing and how oh so very great full he is for it this very moment. Whether you’re his ex or not.

With each stroke his breathe quickened, tension building up all around him till finally he was able to release it, thick and warm cum shooting out of him as he lets out a moan loud enough to make up for the 3 days you’ve been apart. His thrusts become slow as he tries to calm his breathing, streams of cum dripping onto his fist that grips his cock. He wouldn’t have this problem if he were with you, because if he were with you right now he’d make sure every last drop of him made it inside of you instead. Once he’s calmed down he looks at the phone on his wall, then back to the mess he created, then back to the phone, within seconds he lifts to his feet and makes it over to the phone to dial in your number.

a/n thank you for the request :) i’m sorry it took a couple days to respond!

Masterlist

[look-a-ghost]

i've gone through the Scott Pilgrim skeptic-to-fanatic pipeline (warp pipe?) and the trajectory was as follows:

watched the movie first and went "god why do people like this so much what the fuck am I missing"

read the comics and went "oh i guess this is what i was missing... yeah it's nice, but..."

binged tf out of Takes Off and lost my fucking mind at how good it was

I struggled a lot with my skepticism of the movie because despite me being firmly within the subcultural demographic (video games nerd who Got All The References; large fan of Edgar Wright) I could not truly bring myself to enjoy it without feeling residually icky. So honestly it weirdly felt like Takes Off was made to DIRECTLY address every single problem I had with both the movie and the comics... But in fairness to SP as a media entity, I do think that my viewing order was kind of skewed, as the movie shorthanded so much stuff and probably worked better as an encapsulation of the comics, and not so much as a full introduction to the overall story and characters (to me at least).

Within the first few minutes of the first ep of SPTO I was already feeling infinitely better about it

(MILD spoiler: what I appreciated most is that Scott actively places less emphasis on dating Knives, where I remember he was bragging more about it in both the movie and the comics, which immediately made me resent him MUCH less than I did),

so I knew for a fact the show was already moving in a smarter direction... little did I know that it would go absolutely batshit with being a fully meta, revisionist narrative to fix essentially all of the misgivings i had with the original source material, AND all while being a fucking blast to watch, no less. Hats off, a million salutes, holy jesus i don't think i've ever been cannonball converted so hard into rabidly loving a media series that i completely did not get at first...

more spoilers below to emphasize how super effective critical hit this was vs me personally

bro they even got simon pegg and nick frost to essentially be sgt. angle and pc butterman in this show like what the fuuuuuuck

even the movie didn't go this hard with the cornetto linking despite it being directed by edgar WRONG i am PERSONALLY UNDER ATTACK HSLJhbljdshbldfjh

[astral-nautical]

suckening liveblog bc i dont wanna spam my friends lol

spoilers ahead!!!!!!!!!!!! going to put all of episode 1 in one post :O

i didnt expect emizel to be pronounced tht way tbh!! em-ee-zel...i expected emi-zel if tht makes Any sense

oh emizel got daddy issues? sad. wait he runs a GANG?

the arts fucking insane dude im so happy they worked w so many people for this

oh hello soda :O bro has some transgender energy already like. who dresses themselves in stuff w their name on it if not someone who picked their own name?

GANG WAR,? i love emizel i dont know if this is the rightr vibe or not but hes giving me 'punk kid whose pretending to be in a gang' and i love him for it

smash bros commentary is so funny omg

oohhh vampire time soon???? fangs gonna BITE

'sometimes i just say shit and idk what it means' SAME SODA.

ohhhhh nooo this is not gooooood. oh em ur getting fucked uppp

FIRST COMBAT WOOOOO omg the music is fucing phenomenal i love u nathan hanover

oh my god this is fuckjign insane NO SODAAAAAAAAAAA

ayo ? kiss time ig. NAHHHHH BITE TIME

wat the fuuuuuuck What the fuuuuuck LMAO FUCK DOUBLE BITE??????? CHOMP CHOMP MOTHERFUCKER

FRENZY CHECK??????? oh here we go dude vampire timeee

so emizels fucked. ANYWAYS ROMANIA

bizlys character art looks like hes abt to cry lmao. sad little twink

im so fond of this guy and hehasnt even talked? hes so funny. why are you so well dressed AYO EYESHADOW?

SHILO IS SO FUNNY I LOVE HIM? oh no his accent is so cute. cute as in like a stuffed animal is cute not like attraction. im aroace

is shilo like? rapunzel? is he not allowed to leave his room ?

hes so funny im so fucking endeared omg

"WHAT DOES A VAMPIRE KNOW ABOUT FENCING?"

oh he IS rapunzel he's never met a mortal!! why is his mother never letting him out :O

oh....he wants a book on birds :,) he wants to read abt pheasants....

HE WANTS A PET PHESSANT I AM GOING TO START CRYING

shilo is a manipulative little BASTARD i love him he can do no wrong in my eyes forever and always. my wet and pathetic cat that i hold so dearly

ohh curious boy curious boy...doing this he should Not b

oh fuck shilo's mom so much i have a bad feeling abt her alreadyyyyy

my bbg...run away flee this place get OUT god i fucking hate his mother she caused him so much shame he's frenzying :((((

'both of you will take me to the darkened door, or i Will Scream." shilo you are my favourite forever and ever

ARTHUR.......OH HIS DESIGN IS COOL AS FUCK

kitty kitty cat :O give me their name rnv ITS A GIRL oh the little kityt noises im going to pass away

void...is she smarter than arthur lmao?

FUCLFUCKFUCK COWBOY VAMPIRE IM SHITTING MYSELFNSJFDJS

arthurs so cool hes like if rumi had a goth phase

fucking What is arthurs deal whts he looking for here. hello

SHILOAPPEARING IN THE AUTO SHOP IM GONNA LOSE IT. GUARD HELP THERE IS OIL ON MYHANDS Who is that.

"i believe in you. you are my special boy<3" shilo is such an asshole i adore him

emizel is here :O the trio are meeting up lets gooo

how did i COMPLETELY miss arthur can control shadows what the FUCK. what the HELL. ARMS OF THE ABYSS?

THE SHOEHSHFJAKGK

"i ask of you to calm down" "...i flick my other shoe at him."

"GREFGOR WE HAVE TO GO EVEYYONEW IS BIG AND TRYING TIO KILL EACH OTHER :(" shilo i adore you.

"uh. Pretend i am dead." (collapses)

this is beyond fucking funny. emi and arthur sorting themselves out while shilo has a panic attack and fakes being dead like a fucking possum

NAH THEY END THE EP THERE? THATS SO FUCKING FUNNY GOODBYE

in conclusion shilo is my newest bbg and my discord server profile is already fanart of him. god bless

[lakemichigans]

tlou episode 6 thoughts!!

- i love the introduction of joel's interrogation tactic ("your answers better match up") being used in a relatively low stakes, chill situation. i hope this scene was a little taste of what's to come, rather than a replacement for the scene we'll see later. (also I loved that couple's dynamic!! so much was shown in so few lines of dialogue)

- ellie with the whiskey omg riley reference??

- holy shit the tension of that scene with the dog was impeccable. my heart seriously skipped a beat when the dog barked

- the reunion with tommy was even more emotional than in game, and i love that they're already living in the established jackson area! it means there are so many little references for players to notice

- "just because life stopped for you doesn't mean it has to stop for me" 😭

- when joel thought he saw sarah :((( and the fact that it happened immediately after talked about sarah and had a little panic attack from the grief. everything that's happening with ellie is bringing up so many emotions and they're all portraying it SO PERFECTLY

- i loved the scene between maria and ellie. in the game, we know maria is the one who tells her about sarah, but we never see it happen. i looooved being able to see ellie's reaction to that.

- "i'm failing in my sleep. it's all i do. it's all i've ever done." FUUUUUUCK just kill me 😭

- tommy and maria expecting a baby fits thematically and i'm very curious to see how that plays into part two / season 2. no spoilers for anyone who hasn't played it but i'm excited to see if there's some crossover between their baby and a future character

- the giraffe poster watching joel while he says he's not her dad. liar liar pants on fire! also i think it was a smart decision to not have ellie run away (it works in the game but would only be a waste of time in the show) and instead to have her say that she overheard the conversation earlier. great adaptation of existing material

- but i do think the scene where ellie and joel decide to go together felt a little rushed as a result of the aforementioned change. on one hand i like how quick it is, because they've both done all the thinking they need to do on their own, so it's only matter of saying "yes". but at the same time it felt a little blink-and-you-miss-it. it's also a very quick decision in the game, but it comes after an arduous bout of gameplay, so it doesn't feel so rushed. i'll have to chew on this one some more!

- i'm so glad they didn't make the jackson folks be the cannibals like some people were theorizing

- "you gonna shoot this thing or get it pregnant?" made me laugh so loud omg

- i'm a little disappointed we didn't get any environmental storytelling about the students at the college. the whole section being crammed into the last 20 minutes was... an interesting choice. i know most of that part of the game is just exploration & gameplay, but i feel the show had a unique chance to explore what the students went through after the outbreak that was only hinted at in notes. it had a lot to say about humanity and community and it could've been a neat parallel to jackson

- yesss that was a much more realistic injury that's still life threatening but actually possible to recover from, rather than rusty rebar fully going through his abdomen lmao

- and he got stabbed in frank's shirt 😭 and the depeche mode song plays 😭 fuck 😭

- SO EXCITED FOR RILEY!!!!!

[freyaswolf]

For years, I lived in bewildered befuddlement regarding the musical musings of Taylor Swift. I usually listen to rock or metal, so her brand of pop was not a part of my usual lineup. However, I gained lovely friends here on Tumblr who swear by our Lady TayTay, so I decided I should check out her stuff. But there was SO MUCH, I didn't even know where to start. Luckily, my dearest mutual and actual friend, @idontgettechnology , took pity on me and made me the most amazing playlist to get me started. She titled it Taylor Swift 101, with a description of "Class is is session bish".

I spent today working my way through it, and it was a revelation! I took notes, cause that's what you're supposed to do in class, so here are my highlights from the 56 song playlist. I know I'm missing out on years of lore regarding TSwift, but I'm eager to learn. After a few more listens I may even be ready for the 201 level of this class lol

Notes below the cut, to save your scrolling thumb 😜

Ok, here we go! (I'm pretty sure these are in the intended order, and mostly these are first impressions)

1. Fifteen: wow, this took me straight back to highschool!

2. Teardrops on my Guitar: yep, I'm already hooked

3. Fearless: UGH!!!!

4. Tied Together with a Smile: FUCK!

5. Whitehorse: Holy shit!

6. Cold as You: DAMN!!!

7. You Belong with Me: (SCREAMING) I'm officially invested!

8. Stay Beautiful: 😍😍😍

9. That's The Way I Loved You: FUUUUUUCK!!!

10. Come Back, Be Here: I'm dead over this one ☠️

11. Sparks Fly: EHRMEHGHERD!!!

12. All Too Well: DUUUUUDE!!! I think this is about Jake Gyllenhaal? Also, OOOUUUUUCCCHHH, I can feel her pain!

13. Dear John: EW! Girl, he's a toxic ass narcissist! Babygirl, you need to ditch those boys, get you a girlfriend instead. I volunteer as tribute, or I would if I wasn't too old and boring lol

14. I Almost Do: 🥺🥺🥺🥺

15. Enchanted: Oh the feels!!! Also, my personal head canon is that this is about Chris Evans 😜

16. Red: oh boy, have I been here!

17. Long Live: THIS IS SUCH A GREAT SONG! OH MY HEART!

18. Blank Space: HA! I love this song!

19. Out of the Woods: girl does not have normal relationships

20. How You Get the Girl: OOOOF! I mean come on, she's literally giving instructions!

21. Bad Blood: Fuck you song if ever I heard one! "You made this mess, you know that right?" Kinda vibes

22. Clean: (hand over heart in salute) I feel you sis!

23. Wonderland: Love this! Also, who is this green eyed boy she keeps mentioning?!

24. Look at What You Made Me Do: love this! "Fine, now I'm the bad guy" vibes 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

25. This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! DUDE!!! LOVE THIS!!! 🤣

26. Gorgeous: Love this! UGH SHUT UP YOUR PRETTY FACE! Also about Chris Evans lol

27. Getaway Car: Damn, I've had a few of these, and yeah nothing good happens in a getaway car. Doomed! Lol

28. Dress: HOT!!!

29. New Years Day: Oh my heart!!!

30. The Man: FUCK YES!!!

31. The Archer: wow, exhausting/exhausted, this poor kid!

32. London Boy: FUCK. (This totally made me think of JQ) lol

33. Paper Rings: LOVE!!! ❤️❤️❤️

34. Cruel Summer: relatable lol

35. Cardigan: Sobbing 😭

36. Ivy: UGH! Made me cry!

37. Exile: FML. SOBBING. FR UGLY CRYING.

38. Champagne Problems: this girl needs a hug

39. Illicit Affairs: OUCH!

40. Coney Island: 🖤

41. Hoax: I am bereft. I feel like I just broke up with all of my exes at once.

42. Gold Rush: definitely about Chris Evans. Also the way I flirt, if you're too perfect, I avoid and ignore. And if I can't do that, I heckle.

43. Tis the Damn Season: FEEEEELS!!!

44. Mirrorball: she needs all of the hugs, and some real friends.

45. No Body, No Crime: I would absolutely hide bodies for her. I would die for her.

45. Betty: I have questions? Also, I 🖤 when she says fuck.

46: Evermore: I liked it, but I didn't have a definitive "note"

47. Antihero: HA!

48. Maroon: I really love it when she says fuck. It may be a new kink for me.

49. Lavender Haze: I really want her to get a girlfriend.

50. You're on Your Own Kid: SO GOOD!

51. Bejeweled: FUCK YES!!!

52. Mastermind: 😈😈😈 I've done this. This is me.

53. The Great War: bonded like war buddies lol

54. High Infidelity: Feels decidedly Hellcheery

55. Would've Could've Should've: DAAAAAMMMMNNN!!!!

56. Dear Reader: WOW

And I am SPENT! This was a rollercoaster of emotions, and I enjoyed the whole fucking time. I am now a ride or die T Swift fan. Dude, I had no idea. Thank you so much MJ for this guided tour, I had the best time today! 🥰

[lovelandfrogispookybear]

2: Empty Cans

Eddie's pov

I lay back on my pile of musty towels. It took all day to collect these, scrounging around in cabinets and drawers. I couldn't find any food though, and it takes all my will not to mow through what little I have in my bag.

As soon as I’m starting to relax again, the shrieking starts again. It sounds just like the bats, but much louder and stronger. I stay still, hoping just like last time that it'll pass. But it doesn't. If anything it gets worse, louder and more violent. Getting impatient, I creep towards the window.

Two large, hulking figures grapple only yards away. Their faces are small and round, covered by what looks like flower petals. Oddly enough, their body figures are more comparable to humans. One of them is thrown against the front wall. The whole building rattles, and I bite down a shout. I quickly stumble back behind the counter, and curl up into my pile of towels.

When I wake up, the figures are gone. It's quiet again. I peer above the counter, inspecting the room. The vines are back, and there's a large crack in the wall where the figure hit. I light a smoke, and grab my spear.

Using the tip of the spear, I peel back plywood from the counter. Using the base of the spear, I hammer the plywood over the windows, as well as the crack in the wall. I keep the door un-boarded, but push tables in chairs in front to keep it barricaded. There. I feel a little safer now. The smoke wafts up, vacating from the smallest of vents in the ceiling. I rummage through my bag, skimming along the bottom and gathering dozens of small items that have accumulated over the years.

I zip my bag back up, and scatter the items in front of me. Looking at it all sends a bit of pain through me. I haven't been here more than 72 hours, but I already miss everything so much. I miss the sun, I miss my bed, food and water, my weed. I miss Hellfire, The Corroded Coffin, Dustin and the kids, I miss Robin, Nancy, and hell even Steve.

A piece of paper sits atop the pile. I unfold it. It was our first band poster. Scribbled out by Gareth, and photocopied on Jeff's busted printer he got at the dumpster.

I remember giving him shit about it, you could hardly read his handwriting and the drawing of us all looked more like a raccoon doing coke of a sidewalk.

"Get it together, Munson..." I whisper to myself. I relent, and grab a beer. I deserve this.

Soon, one beer turns into two, and two turns into the rest of them. My eyes settle on the empty cans around me, and I realize what I've just done.

"Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck fuck fuuuuuuck!" I shout. I sit up. "Fuck!" I kick a can across the room and slump to the ground.

"Fuck..."

I open my eyes slowly. Something skitters around behind the counter. I get on all fours, and carefully crawl towards it.

I can feel it before it happens. My hand hits an empty beer can. The skittering stops. I flip up, lunging over the counter. The thing bolts back, easily manuvering through my barricade and out the now-open door. Whatever came in is out of sight.

"Shit!"

I grab my spear, light a smoke, shove aside my barricade, and leave. So much for staying safe.

"Where the fuck are you!" I shout. I slam my spear into the ground, and hear a roar in the distance. Shit. Shoulda thought this through. I bolt, and not soon after I can large pounding footsteps behind me. I look back, and see a grey blur behind me. I look forward, and smack immedeitly into a pole.

I try and sit up, and the blur spins around like the stars over my head.

As my vision clears I get a better look at the thing in front of me.

Tall, hulking, and muscular. Its grey skin is mottled and slimy, and its hands are elongated and clawed. It turns towards me, and its head opens up like a flower. It looks just like the bats, but ten times more terrifying. I can see teeth going all the way into its throat.

"W-w-what the fuck?" I shout.

It turns to me. Slowly, it starts forwards on all fours, its claws making wet slaps as they hit the pavement.  I step back as it approaches.

All of a sudden, it pounces at me. I cower down, trying to cover my face with my arms. But before it makes impact, something knocks it to the side. Another one, another, another thing. This one is smaller, and on all fours like a dog. Despite how much smaller it is, it tackles the bigger one and the two engage in fight.

[bunnakit]

last twilight episode 4 thoughts, feelings, etc.

as always, i'm just some foul mouthed gremlin online.

holy shit. the episodes keep hitting us like a truck immediately.

do you think Mhok's hands smell like jasmine? do you think someday in the future they'll lay in bed at the end of their day and Day will hold Mhok's hand gently to his face, press a kiss to the inside of his wrist, and smile because Mhok smells like jasmine from all the blossoms he has picked for him throughout their time together?

sorry, i'm mentally ill. anyway.

the correction from boss to friend, oh fuuuuuuck. and Mhok asking Day if he's coming with - once again as Mhok always does he gives Day a choice and make sure Day is an active participant in his own life. kissing him on the forehead, Mhok you're doing such an amazing job as a caretaker. you're not perfect, but fuck you're better than most trained professionals i've seen to be honest. and Mhok doesn't just turn the radio on for Day, he guides Day to turn it on himself. UGH. UUUUGH.

I can't look at you, look into your eyes, or confront you

Oh. Ough the pain is unending and forever. Day quite literally can't do those things, even if he reaches that point emotionally where he might want to. Life is great because there are so many vegetables you can saute, but also, the horrors.

Once again, Porjai and Mhok's friendship is so important to me. Porjai is just so important to me (ignore the fact that I'm half in love with her fuck she's so beautiful-) it's so important for Mhok to have this support system and this friendship and UGH. I'm so glad there's no fallout from the fight.

AND AGAIN HE ANNOUNCES HIMSELF TO DAY. Mhok does this every single time he returns to Day's side, he very rarely forgets to announce himself to Day. He's so fucking good about it.

AND DAY ONCE AGAIN TRYING TO ESTABLISH HIMSELF AS A FRIEND. AND MHOK'S SMILE. CHEWING THROUGH MY DESK.

I also love Porjai not making assumptions of how she should act, she just asks Day what she should do to make him comfortable. Punching my desk, punching my desk, punching my desk. It's so funny how these complete strangers to Day have treated him with so much more dignity than his own family (however, it is difficult for family to navigate a newly disabled family member because there is this inherent need to protect and sometimes that protection goes too far into coddling, so I don't want to shit on his family constantly. It's a really tricky situation to navigate for the people closest to you.)

His voice is like the scent of cigarettes.

I'm never writing fanfiction again because nothing I write will top this, hey Day what the fuck. I also think this is a good example of Day's major; we know he was majoring in journalism and the sensation he creates here is incredible - and it shows he's still fully capable of capturing the essence of the world, of a story, without his sight. He offers a new perspective that is no less beautiful.

MHOK'S BAG SAYS 'I LOVE TO HEAR YOUR VOICE' RIGHT AFTER THAT CONVERSATION I'M GOING TO THROW UP WHAT THE FUUUUCK IS THIS ALLOWED

Oh, the way Mhok guides Day where to look when he's taking the photo so it looks natural, so he can keep his secret from the general public until he's ready. Ouuugghhhghh.

Oooof. The trophy only having one handle; only one player remains, half of the duo is missing, an incomplete set. And Day can't even read the plaque anymore. He can no longer see his own accomplishments.

This isn't important but the transition from part 2 to part 3 being all Namtan fuck I'm so bisexual.

WHY WAS THAT HAND TOUCH SO SENSUAL- YOU'RE JUST GONNA STROKE EACH OTHERS HANDS LIKE THAT IN FRONT OF MY SALAD???

FUCKING RIGHT THERE ON THE BED WOULD HAVE BEEN LESS INTIMATE. I feel like I'm fucking intruding. Holy shit. Holy shiiiiiit.

Staring unblinkingly at every red flag Porjai dodged. Also want to point out the only times we've seen Mhok get violent has been to protect the people closest to him - even back at the garage. He's never once been violent for his own gain, it's always been to protect.

Oh, Porjai. The circumstances are absolutely shit but there's no doubt in my mind that your child is going to be so, so loved by everyone around them. I just know Mhok is going to adore that kid.

Coming into this scene at the party makes me so anxious. Reintegration into society can be so, so scary. Day has been dipping his toe into it but this is a big, chaotic gathering. This is so scary and I'm so proud of him but like hhhggg makes me nervy.

Ugh I have a feeling Day is going to be exhausted after this. He's already having to field (I don't want to say stupid questions) a whole slew of questions and over the top concern. It's going to be a lot.

"To our blind friend" bro I'm gonna kick you into the sun.

Oh Mhok you want Day to want you so bad it makes you look stupid, I love you.

I knew he was going to sing that song, I knew it in my heart, but it still makes me emotional with the rainbow background. (I also love "I don't sing that well" and then proceeds to sing with the voice of an angel. [What if he actually isn't that good of a singer but it sounds that way to Day because of his affection for Mhok???])

Tell me why my ass is crying at Day trying to see Mhok on his phone, and looking up and barely being able to see anything of him. He wants to see him so bad.

OH NOW I'M GENUINELY SOBBING.

I love that while the show emphasizes that Day can see Mhok in a way no one else can, he still has that desire to see him physically. It hurts and it's so painful to watch but it's just another element of this show that makes it so real. Just because Day is starting to adjust, just because he can gauge a lot about people from the sound of their voice, it doesn't magically replace the sense he's losing and it doesn't make him miss that any less. I'm just gonna blanket apologize for how long these are getting. I feel like I don't have much insight lately rather than just raw reactions but this show makes me feel so fucking much. for my tag loves (just lmk if you want me to remove you from these, or add anyone idk) @benkaaoi @callipigio