#but for some reason once i started drawing in the birds i didn't feel like the sketchier/hatching look would work

[fullmetal-scar-simping]

Monk [name unknown], taking a moment to share with the local avians

[battymommastuff]

The Other Side

Batmom x Batman, Batmom x Batfamily

Prompt: While digging through the attic, Dick Grayson and Jason Todd uncover a secret about their adoptive mother. A secret that reveals the true, and dark story of the most loved couple in Gotham City

!!TW!! - MENTIONS OF SA AND OTHER DARK THEMES

Part 1 Part 2 Masterlist

!!DISCLAIMER!! - This likely won't be comic accurate (Obviously), but I did draw inspiration from the comics. If you are looking for something accurate, then this fanfic isn't for you.

You didn't get a chance to address the deep voice before a cloth was covering your face and the world went dark. A throbbing pain came next when you awoke. You were laying on a very luxurious bed. Looking down, you saw that you were still in your same clothing. Just a silk robe that covered your underwear. Your heart was racing as you looked around the room. Whoever lived here, lived in style. Everything looked as if it would cost you bodily organs to own. 

Before the shock could wear off, the two massive double doors opened, and a man walked into the room. A mask covering his face, and his eyes watched you carefully. Your body visibly shrunk as you stared at the intimidating man across the room from you, "Ms. (L/N), I do want to apologize for the rather harsh retrieval of you. We have to take precautionary measures these days." The man said while stepping closer to you. He stepped into the moonlight, and you finally saw every detail of his mask. A golden bird mask...no owl mask. What the hell is going on? 

"W-What do you want with me?" You asked, moving off of the bed once he got too close to you. The bed now served as a barrier between you and your kidnapper, but it didn't provide any comfort for you. All you could think of was being raped, and sold on the black market. Gotham City wasn't the safest city, but you never thought this would happen to you. How did this happen? There was always security watching over the bunk area every night to make sure this never happened. How did these men get in to kidnap you? Whatever the reason, you didn't feel safe with the circus anymore. 

"To give you a chance...a chance to be apart of something great. My organization works from the shadows to ensure the safety of our beautiful city..." Beautiful isn't a word you would use, but sure, "You possess a talent that could be beneficial to our cause." The man picked up a remote and turned the tv on. What played was several of your acts and some of your rehearsals. All taken from vantage points, and places that you wouldn't have noticed someone watching you, "We've come to realize that our organization is seen as a myth, a boogeyman. Many criminals fear us, and with your talents...we could harness that fear." He stepped around the bed and started making his way towards you once again. The fear you felt kept your legs from moving, so this time he got uncomfortably close to you, "Join us (Y/N). Join us and help us purge Gotham of everything that taints it." 

The Court of Owls. One of Gotham's scariest myths. You've heard whispers of them while spending days in the city. Some of your fellow performers even mentioned them once or twice. Everything you've ever heard was never good. This cult believes they are doing the right thing, but are harming so many in the process. You couldn't join them...you couldn't live your life in the shadows. What could ever be so wonderful about someone so full of darkness? It seemed that the man saw what you were thinking, and he backed away, "Such a shame...you would have been such a valuable asset. I'm afraid if you won't join us, then we have to do away with you. You will pose a risk to all of us." The man turned his back towards you, and you knew now was your chance. Grabbing the closest thing to you; a lamp, you hit him over the bed. The man dropped to the ground, and you ran to the window. Luckily you weren't too high from the ground, so you pushed the window open and climbed out. 

You could hear voices and yelling as you dashed into the dark, raining city. You hadn't a clue where you were going, but anywhere would be better than this. The circus would be the first place they would look, so you had to find somewhere new. You could hear footsteps behind you as well as some above you. They were after you, and they were fast. Thankfully, your breathing training worked wonders. Still you were no match for these skilled men. They managed to corner you into a dead end alley. This is it. The place where your dead body would be found. It all ended here. The vile smell of puke, piss, and garbage filled your nose as you looked around at the court members closing in on you, "P-Please...I promise I won't tell anyone. Just let me go." You pleaded, but it seemed to fall on deaf ears. From behind you were pushed to your knees, and you could see your reflection in the blade meant for your death. 

The member lifted the blade up, but before it could meet your skin...a rope wrapped around their wrist. With a scream, they were pulled into the darkness. It felt as if all sound in the city stopped...everything went quiet. You felt fear before, but this was a new level of fear. A fear that you never would forget. A black shadow flew by, grabbing another member. This caused the rest of them to ignore you, and turned their attention to their surroundings. Now would have been the perfect time to run, but your legs were screaming. The adrenaline was wearing off, and it felt like you couldn't move an inch. A bolt of lightning flashed through the sky, right as a shadow covered the alley...a shadow of a bat. The mysterious savior dropped down on one of the members, and a fight broke out. You could only watch in awe as your savior took down every single member without much struggle. Once it was over, the figure turned towards you. Again the lighting allowed you a glimpse of him. The bat symbol of his chest matched the one in the night sky. 

"Batman..." You whispered, with relief before your eyes rolled back and you slumped to the ground. Batman walked towards you, and gently picked you up from the ground. He didn't see any visible injuries besides little scrapes on your knees from being pushed to the ground. Even now you were just as beautiful as you were while performing. He held you close and summoned the Batmobile. No hospital in Gotham would be safe enough for you. He needed to take you to the batcave. There you would be safe, and he could question you. 

"Alfred, get the med-bay ready. We have a guest." Batman said into his comms, after sitting you in the passenger seat. Your head leaned on the window, but your lips were starting to turn blue. Judging from your attire, you must have been getting ready for bed. With one final look over to make sure you were secure, he raced off into the streets of Gotham to the batcave.

TAGLIST

@maxinehufflepuffprincess @tayswhp @rainycloud858 @luna-zendra-star @starlets-things @simpfourmarvel @kawaistrawberry21 @js-favnanadoongi @kodzukenmaaa @xxrougefangxx @pixviee @discocactus-world @b4tm4nn @minimoxha @crutoyu @nightw-izhu @legendarylearner18 @mangegeek17 @pixiedust0604 @that-one-fangirl69

[tragedybunny]

Sunlight and Stars in the Sky III - Astarion X F!Reader

The third, and last, part of a little arc about Astarion's confession.

Part 1 Part 2

Astarion has confessed everything to you, to try to make your relationship real. When he discovers it isn't as easy as he thought, he's determined to make things right between the two of you.

Astarion was happy, the happiest he could remember being, as he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you tight against his chest. You cared about him and, impossibly, you forgave what he'd been trying to do to you. Snuggled into your hair, he breathed you in, wildflowers and sun-warmed forests. It wasn't what he expected at all. He'd thought you'd scream and curse him, say you never wanted to talk to him again, maybe even force him to leave the camp. 

But you hadn’t. With soft words and the sweetest embrace, you'd told him you cared and would wait for him to be ready for anything more. His Sunlight, you were so good to him. And it was real now, what the two of you had, you had told him that. "Will you still share my tent?" His hand in yours, his voice caught in his throat as he asked. What if you didn't want to without the promise of intimacy? 

“Of course Love,” you’d smiled warmly, “I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.” 

That’s what led the two of you here, cozily cuddled together, your fingers entwined in his as you lay with your back against him. “No hunting tonight?” 

“It can wait, there’s not much out there and I want all the time I can while you’re awake.” His lips brush your ear, the tiny half-elf point is a bit of a fascination of his, the way sometimes it makes you either giggle or make one of your happy little noises depending on just how it's touched. Tonight you sigh softly, you must be tired. 

Astarion waits until you’re completely asleep to go out hunting, even then he’s loath to disentangle himself from you, afraid you could somehow just vanish. It still stings when he thinks of that first night you stayed in his tent, you were gone when he came back from hunting. Laying there alone in the dark, it was like he had been robbed of something he hadn’t even known he had, and he couldn’t fathom why. Later he learned you still thought you were unwanted at his side. He’d make sure you never thought that again, you were his and he was yours. 

Hunting doesn’t take long, there’s really nothing about, a stray bird that found its way through the curse somehow. Once you all made it to Moonrise he’d make use of some cultists. Besides, that’s all the sooner he can have you back in his arms. Soft steps approach the tent, he doesn’t want to wake you. But something draws his attention, a sound, hushed sobs from within. Frantic that you’ve been harmed somehow, he hurries through the opening only to find you curled up on your side, face hidden in a pillow. Visibly unharmed, it's only your feelings that seem to be wounded by something.  “Darling, are you alright?” Settling next to you, he hesitates before reaching over. Is this what he’s supposed to do? Or do you want space? His hand hangs in the air far too long while he tries to decide. 

You shift and he loses the opportunity, sitting up a little to rub your eyes and try to hide your tears. “I’m fine, nothing to worry about.” 

Awkwardly, he puts a hand on your shoulder. “You can talk to me. Please?” That’s what couples do, they talk to each other, but you’re holding back, and his doubts are starting to claw their way into his mind. 

His eyes meet yours and the sudden realization knocks the air out of him. It’s him, he’s the reason for the tears. How he can see it, he doesn’t know, he’s sure all the same though. But still, you force a little smile for him. “Astarion please, I promise it’s fine.” 

It would seem it’s your turn for pretty lies, and he wants to go along with it with all his heart. Let it go, wait for it to pass, bury it and never look back. But that wound will stay there, unresolved, festering. With a shaky hand, he cups your face gently. “Love, please, I���” He doesn’t know what more to say, so he lets you go and hangs his head. Perhaps he's not meant for this afterall. 

“It’s just…a lot to take in. And it hurts to have been lied to.” Even with your eyes still watery, you’re so gentle with him. Far too gentle. 

Arms move, reaching for you, but he stops, unsure if you'd want the comfort of the one that brought you pain. “I thought we were alright.” He hurt you, his Sunlight, his Darling, his Love, and everything in him wants to run, to get away before this all can go even worse, before he has to hear you say you've changed your mind.

“We will be,” you say, voice worn from crying.

Hells, he can’t let you do this again, be the strong one, put yourself to the side for someone else. Moving closer, he cautiously wraps his arms around you, still not knowing if it's what you want. “I’m sorry. I was so afraid, I didn’t think about hurting you.” 

Returning his embrace, you nuzzle into his neck, an affectionate gesture he couldn’t even conceive of a few days ago, and now he’d die a thousand deaths to keep feeling it. “I know, I’m not mad.” 

“Gods, perhaps you should be. At least if you took it out on me, we’d be even.” Astarion gives a shaky laugh, plunging ahead despite his doubts, because you’re still there, still holding him even after everything. 

You answer with a peculiar little snort-laugh, a sound he’s never heard from yoy. For a fleeting moment he ponders how many more little facets of yours he’ll get to learn about in the time that he gets with you. “Please, if I yelled at you, you’d sulk for days.” 

“I said we’d be even Darling, not that I’d take it gracefully.” Kissing the top of your head, he smiles, grateful you’re playing along. 

“In that case,” you sit up and give him a serious look, which is immediately undercut by the grin you're suppressing, “you’re awful, you have bad hair, and you’re a messy eater.” You gesture to the recent puncture wounds in your neck for emphasis.  

His jaw goes slack and he puts a hand over his heart in mock shock. “I didn’t realize you would be so ruthless about it. Why, if I still could, I would walk into the sun and burn myself out of pure heartbreak.” 

Both of you dissolve into laughter and he scoops you into his lap, lingering giggles dying away as he covers your lips with his. “There, we’re even.” Your head comes to rest against his chest as his fingers trace small circles on your back. 

“In all seriousness, Love, I need you to talk to me. I don’t know how to do any of this, give me a fighting chance.” At the last word, his voice cracks in a way that he abhors, not only does his pride shudder at the thought of breaking in front of you, he still wants to be the strong one right now, to give you that. 

“You really mean that, don’t you?” Turning in his arms, you kneel in front of him, eyes locked to his, hands on his shoulders. 

There’s a different kind of intimacy to this, to looking you in the eyes and giving you the truth without obfuscation or embellishment. His first impulse is to look away, but he resists, keeping his gaze steady. Hands come to rest on your waist, a look of peace crossing your face at his touch. “With all my heart, Sunlight.” 

Lips press to his, fervent but not demanding of anything more. With a swift motion, he pulls you down into the blankets, causing you to gasp in surprise. “Astarion!” You try to sound exasperated, but sigh happily as he wraps himself around you. “I’m glad we talked about this, thank you.”

“I mean, I am incredible in every other way, of course I’m a wonderful partner. Now I believe I am owed one overly-sappy term of endearment or I’ll be deeply hurt.” 

“My Starry Sky.” The silly little nickname has a way of making everything inside him flutter somehow, but the way your voice was right now, soft and affectionate, warm, like a home he didn’t know he had, he’d die if you asked him too. Or at least strongly consider it. 

After pulling some of the scattered mess of covers over the two of you, lips brush yours one more time , and you tuck your head under his chin. Exactly where you belong. 

[idorukiss]

Heres a sorta drabble/headcanon of sorts of how I picture MC's relationship with Rafayel would devleop~ I'm not much of a writer but the brainrot is real and im working on making similar ones for the other boys too!

1,051 words || You can also read it on ao3

‧͙⁺˚･༓･˚⁺‧͙⁺˚･༓･˚⁺‧͙⁺˚･༓･˚⁺‧͙⁺˚･༓･˚⁺‧͙⁺˚･༓･˚⁺‧͙ Xavier ・ Zayne ・ Sylus

There have been many different things in Rafayel's life that inspired him when it comes to his art, But nothing took control of his heart so intensely as much as you have. Like a whirlpool you shook him to his core from that first meeting, and all he wants to do is capture you on his canvas for eternity.

It really was quite the blessing with how willing you were to become his bodyguard- not only can he keep you within arms reach but you can also protect him from all the shady people after his life. Like killing 2 birds with one stone, except you were so much stronger and beautiful than any stone he’s ever set eyes on before

He absolutely felt like a flirt to you at the start with all of the compliments and casual physical touch between you guys, He just loved to say how amazing you are while enclosing you in a deep bear hug. It was strange at first you'd admit, but it never felt like he was trying to make any passes at you or act like he was expecting anything in return. Perhaps that's just how he acts with people he trusts?

When Rafayel isnt painting, you two spend a lot of time outside finding inspiration all around. He usually has a sketchbook with him scribbling away anytime he sees something interesting- the landscapes, pretty flowers, or even a parfait you guys got to share. You’ve seen some of these sketches as he works on them, it always amazes you how much detail he can capture with so few lines.

He never let you fully flip through the sketchbook however, claiming all sorts of reasons why, like that the drawings were scared of the sunlight or you had to go through many trials to be worthy. It was obvious how much he cherished it and you respected his wishes, though it would be nice to reminisce on some of the good times you guys had together again. Though its not like your phone wasn't filled to the brim with photos already

Late one night, you stop by his place to make sure he didn't need any motivation to finish a painting for a deadline set the next morning. You have confidence he could make it in time, he always did, but you want to help him as best as you can otherwise. When you arrive you spot a stunning completed painting and a Rafayel sleeping on the sofa below it- both stunning as they're illuminated by the moonlight.

Taking it upon yourself to clean up his supplies a little, just enough to not be a walking hazard of course, you spot his precious travel sketchbook on the floor. Surely he wouldn't mind if you took a little peak in it, you'd love to see how he finished the last landscape you guys saw before he locked himself up to work. As you flip through the pages you see so many familiar sights from your time together so far, but scattered around them filling maybe even more pages was many drawings of a person. Of you. All surrounded by hearts and little notes about things you've said.

When did he have a chance to draw all of these? Is this how you look to him?? Questions race your mind as your face flushes at the image of him intensely scribbling in the sketchbook as you dance around the beach being dumb. You decide to grab a pencil and add your attempt of a sketch of him in the back, signing it with a little heart of your own. It’s nowhere near his skill level but something that captures how you feel, and maybe he would get a chuckle out of it once he spots it.

You don’t realize when the casual acts of affection he started out with turn slightly more romantic- going from linking arms together to holding your hand, and you swear you feel him press little kisses on the top of your head every time he wraps his arms around you. But you don't hate it, in fact it makes your heart flutter every time you realize it

Rafayel often messages you at the most random times to meet him somewhere, usually it was because he found a stunning view and wanted to share the experience with you. Sometimes he would even show up at your apartment to whisk you away, and every time it filled you with joy. These dates and every moment you get to spend with him fill your heart with so much warmth.

One particularly warm night you were woken up by a call inviting you to the beach near his studio. It was worth crawling out of the bed at an ungodly hour, not only for the view but for him. While you were admiring the waves, he couldn't keep his eyes off you as a cautious pinky is hooked around yours. Two faces flush as you look at him, it lasts for only a moment before its interrupted by your watch.

Your face falls as you read the notification “It looks like I got a last minute mission in the morning…I guess this means I have to head back already.” As you take a heavy step to start walking away he reaches out to stop you with a pleading look on his face “Wait, don’t go yet” “Rafayel…. I’m sorry, I really am. This night- everything was wonderful, it really was” “Can’t you just stay the night?” He wraps his arms around you, nuzzling his face into your neck “Please just stay the night, I don’t want you to leave.” Your heart flutters as you wrap your arms around him in return “Okay, I’ll stay for you my sweet painter”

He is the most clingy man you’ve ever met, constantly torn between wrapping himself around you while peppering every inch of skin with kisses and diving headfirst into hundreds of paintings with you as his muse. His studio would be covered in nothing but paintings of you if he didn't have to focus on his commissions.

He sculpted out a place in your heart that held him, and in turn you've devoted yourself to him- loving him with every fiber of your being

[violetrainbow412-blog]

Trust [K. B]

Kaz Brekker x fem!reader

wc: 7.8k

summary: something goes wrong with a heist and Kaz's anger lashes out at you, only later realizing it's not for the reasons you thought.

A/N: I feel like it took me literally YEARS to write this. Someone requested the central idea but I decided to expand a bit and since in anon he mentioned that they like hurt/comfort I hope I have achieved it. I hope you like it, thanks for reading!

warnings: trauma (again)

taglist: @be-lla-vie @milkshake0 @ladespedidas

As soon as you stepped foot inside The Slat, you felt enormous relief to think that you could finally get some rest. The day before, the boss had told you that it was necessary to recover something and had drawn up a general outline of how things would be carried out, so to avoid mistakes, instead of sending just one group, the whole team would go. But at a certain point things had gone wrong and then the whole mission had gone awry. You were scared and everyone else was scared, but you knew that Kaz was probably the most upset about it. He hadn't spoken to anyone since you had to flee the mansion.

“Well, I declare that a resounding failure. Good night, my friends,” Jesper said, holding his side with a wince. Wylan was at his side to catch him in case the pain buckled his knees.

You sighed, defeated, and started walking towards the stairs to take a shower to remove all traces of dust, blood, and shame that you had impregnated on your skin, however, Kaz's cane stopped hitting you in the stomach, blocking your way and suffocating you at the same time.

"Are you crazy?" he asked, his voice raspier than usual. You asked yourself if he was referring to your plans, which he obviously couldn't know about, and why he was upset, but it didn't take anything more to get an answer, "What the fuck was that in the mansion?"

Oh, that is what he meant. 

To recap a bit, your goal that night was to recover a few bags of cash that a new gang at The Barrel had stolen but originally belonged to the Crow Club, i. e you guys. It was a payment for an exchange that Kaz had made days ago with art supplies or something, it was a business that none of you were very involved in.

The black-haired man knew the place where it was kept (he always seemed to know the whole city like the back of his hand) and so he had drawn up a pretty solid plan with which you could get away with it. Regularly his plans contemplated in the most opportune way each of your abilities: guns, stealth, the Grisha qualities, strength, chemicals, and the skills with your hands in which you surpassed the man. It was almost like something in you and your friends used to joke that your hands were a kind of magnet for everything shiny, although those same hands also worked perfectly to use a pick and give access to many places.

Things were going well that night, until you had to make a last-minute decision when you found out that an unknown person was in the place and you wanted to get them out of there so they wouldn't be in the crossfire. That was the 'certain point' I had mentioned before, where everything got screwed up. It was about a poor and defenseless servant girl who started screaming like crazy when she saw you and although you tried to calm her down that was enough to draw the attention of the guards, who came towards you to capture you. And since you were very busy struggling with two armed goons, you couldn't fulfill your part of the plan, which was to open the vault where the money that you were going to steal was. It had been a rather unfortunate chain of events.

"Kaz, you know I didn't mean to…"

"Are you deaf, then?" he interrupted you, ignoring your attempt at justification. He took a step towards you, limping a bit due to the lack of a cane, and then you could see the expression on his face.

You'd only seen Kaz this angry once and the poor man who caused it was already resting in peace, so you cringed in on yourself like a scared little bird.

"Or why didn't you do what we agreed?" you didn't know if he wanted a verbal answer, but even if he had, what could you say to that? It was more than obvious why you had done it "If there is a plan, it is because that plan must be executed as I have said, if not, then what would it be?"

"I shouldn’t…"

"No, you shouldn't," he interrupted again, speaking louder than usual to look imposing. And boy he was doing it. “That was the stupidest thing you've ever done, and all for a damn maid? What were you thinking?

"I wanted to help her"

"Oh really? And how did she thank you? Yelling at the guards to come to get you! Did you think about that before acting? Do you ever consider the consequences?” his voice didn't drop in volume, but rather rose gradually with each word that came out of his mouth.

You were in a panic, somehow strangely having the strength to meet his angry eyes, for you didn't think he would start saying such things to you in front of everyone else, who had been silent since the exchange had begun. You tried to think of anything to defend yourself, but even if you found the right argument you knew you couldn't outsource it due to nerves.

Even with your devoted silence, Kaz did not seem satisfied and he continued speaking.

“You had to follow simple orders: wait for the signal and open the vault. Everyone stayed in their positions. Was it very difficult for you to do that?”

"Kaz, I don't think…" Jesper started to say, trying to help him out of the situation, but he fell silent as he watched the black-haired boy turn his head to look at him. It was true, you guys hadn't seen Kaz in that state more than a few times and even the gunslinger, who loved you immensely, thought it wiser to keep silent if he didn't want the opponent's anger to lash out at him.

"Look at Jesper," he said close to your face. If he hadn't been so averse to touching you, you were sure he would have held your face to keep your gaze on him, because by this point your eyes were cloudy and you were trying to focus on anything other than the conversation “He's hurt. You are hurt. Imagine what would have happened if we hadn't been able to get out in time or if Inej hadn't come to your rescue, do you think those men would have tempted their hearts before killing all of us? Of course not! There's no room for charity here because until that servant was in real danger, she wasn't your problem. You behaved stupidly and those actions affected all of us” Kaz fell silent and you thought that was it. You were with your arms crossed, perhaps as an unconscious act of seeking protection, not daring to look at him.

But he took a few seconds to examine you and then said something else:

It is your fault that we are now in this state; without a single penny in our pockets.

The words your fault, and without a penny were the cause of a tug across your chest. It was useless to hold back the tears that had already treacherously begun to slide down your cheeks and that you wished you had the strength to wipe off with the sleeve of the jacket you were wearing.

In all the time you had belonged to the crows he had never spoken to you like that. There had been disagreements, of course, and he'd even called you out for neglecting some tasks he'd given you, but those kinds of hurtful words were reserved for criminals from whom he extracted information or threatened. That's why you were so upset, because Kaz was terrifying when he put his mind to it and you'd just had the misfortune to experience it firsthand.

The rest of your friends were also perplexed by what had just happened, since most of them had found your outburst in the mansion quite justifiable, since it was an innocent life that you had tried to protect, a very present code always.

The other part that had managed to break you was knowing that the man's annoyance was actually due to the money you had caused him to lose rather than the fact that you or someone else had been in danger. Or at least that was what you had understood by the final sentence.

The silence was sepulchral, no one even dared to breathe harder than usual for fear that he would take them as the next victim, and only a small sob that escaped you broke the silence. You hoped that would soften Kaz’s expression a bit, but he didn't flinch.

A part of you thought, due to shock, to apologize to him, but you weren't even able to. You just stood in the middle of that room under his questioning gaze.

When your body finally wanted to react, you walked directly to the stairs to go up to your room, without even looking back, collapsing on the floor and crying as soon as you closed the door behind you. You didn't even think about taking a shower anymore and the burning pain in your ribs, which you hadn't mentioned to anyone about, intensified. You had to cover your mouth with your hand so that the crying wouldn’t reach the floor below and you felt that everything around you was spinning.

You stayed in that position for a few minutes, which felt like hours, until someone opened the door and stuck their head inside. It was Nina, who had surely gone of her own free will but also partly at the request of others. She could hear your erratic heartbeat and your lungs struggling to hold some air, so it didn't take her more than a second to kneel next to you to wrap her arms around you and start running her hand up and down trying to comfort you. She offered to heal you and you agreed, but through it all you thought that even though the blows on your body burned like hell, what was definitely causing you the most pain was the wounds you just received to your heart.

After that night you could say that the tension in The Slat could be cut with a knife. You thought that the others were also going to blame you for the failure of the heist, with justifiable reasons, but you were pleasantly surprised to find out that this wasn’t the case, since they all told you so explicitly as soon as they had a chance. Matthias, who was most of the time the most mature among you, told you that sometimes things went wrong and that at least he was glad that you were okay; with Nina there, the physical problems could be solved and the money would be recovered somehow. But, to your surprise, it was Kaz they weren't very happy with.

You never meant to start a mutiny against the boss, God knows you didn't, but as much as you tried to change their minds, they were distant and reluctant to talk to Brekker. And Kaz, in turn, didn't exchange a single word with you.

Jesper and Nina were the ones who showed it the most, the first one kept looking down at your friend as if he could make him combust spontaneously with his eyes while the woman simply didn't say anything, as if he were invisible. The rest of the group hadn't cut off the communication suddenly, but it was evident that they weren't entirely happy with the black-haired man's behavior.

Although there were few occasions when the seven of you, or the majority, coincided in the same space, since you were always doing other things around The Barrel or the club.

You weren't the proud type, yet you refused to offer an apology for something that wasn't wrongdoing and finally stopped feeling guilty for applying this silent treatment to thinking that Kaz deserved it. Just a little. Also, if he didn't bother to talk to you, everything would be easier for you, because, although you still did some general tasks, most of the time you spent locked in your room, doing anything to entertain yourself.

If you looked at it from the outside, unaware that you guys were a bunch of criminals living in the same horrible building, that looked like a real teenage fight. But you couldn't blame yourself too much, because you were teenagers.

Sometimes, when he didn't notice, you watched him from afar. You analyzed his expression, his posture, his eyes, anything that would help you figure out if he really cared about your absence or the silence of others. You tried to believe that he was in a bad mood (more than usual) because he wanted you to not be angry anymore, but after a long time you always came to the same conclusion; he was inscrutable, shielded in that armor that you highly doubted could shatter, much less by you. Sometimes you wished you could know what Kaz was thinking so you could figure out if he had noble motives for acting the way he did or if he was just a heartless jerk. And, although your desire to read minds wasn’t fulfilled, you began to bet more on the latter the day a new job was presented. It was, now, a kind of revenge against the men of the opposing gang (who had stolen your business payment in the first place), however, when the meeting took place you noticed that he was skipping a detail. 

"And what will Y/N do?" Jesper had asked, going ahead of you, after listening carefully to the plan and realizing that you weren't contemplated anywhere. You expected Kaz to say you were going to stick with him, even if it was so he could keep an eye on you and avoid another outburst, but when he shook his head you were completely offended.

"She's not coming"

It was one thing to have received a scolding for the mistake made and quite another to be removed from the team just like that. And that Kaz had responded as if you weren't there made you feel completely humiliated and, consequently, angry.

"Great, so now it turns out that I'm grounded," you said sarcastically. It was the first time in weeks that you had spoken directly to Kaz and he just looked at you sideways for a few seconds, as if examining you, which made your blood boil even more "Are you really going to leave me out?" you continued, now with more seriousness than before. You wished he dared to face you with an answer, and you were surprised at how quickly this happened.

"It’s not personal. This time it’s better that you stay” was all the explanation he offered you. The way he said it made it clear to you that it wasn't up for discussion and you felt powerless, but before any of your friends could say anything in your defense, you decided to take it the best way.

If Kaz didn't want you around, you weren't going to make him. If you didn't receive even a measly part of the money from now on, you didn't care. If it was true that you had screwed up, you weren't sorry for anything and you weren't going to give in so easily, despite the love and respect you felt for him.

“Good luck then,” was all you said, offering the best fake smile you could have and purposely patting Kaz on the shoulder. He watched you walk away with eyes wide open in surprise, even though you didn't even notice it when you got lost in the hallway, and it was hard for him to keep his composure as he turned around again to clear up any doubts regarding how the crime would be carried out; although he tried to hide it, almost most of the group could tell.

What the hell did Kaz have against you lately? The others had made mistakes countless times and never suffered consequences as harsh as yours, because probably the hardest part had been dealing with the boss's anger and being forced to find a solution for what they had screwed up. You probably would have offered to get the money back yourself if he had let you end the problem, but you couldn't even do that because you knew it would only fan the fires of anger.

So when you left there everyone thought that things had already gone on too long and someone had to point it out to Kaz.

"Is everything clear?" he asked, looking at the crows and receiving a general nod.

We would have to wait until night to work, so once there was nothing more to say, each one dispersed in opposite directions.

“Inej,” Kaz said, not even looking back. He knew she was there, he always knew, as if there was a connection between the two of them "Everything okay?"

“Everyone is where they should be. The carriage is on its way and the streets are free”

"Good"

“But there is something else we need to talk about”

Kaz was afraid it was something to do with you, and he closed his eyes for a moment at the possibility. They were on a roof, he too close to the shore to be able to supervise that the robbery was carried out effectively, and she took a few steps until she reached his side. The two kept looking down for a few seconds, preparing internally for what was coming; talking about feelings was never one of their strengths.

"What would that be about?”

"About who" she corrected him "This discussion with Y/N has already escalated to exacerbated levels, you didn't have to forbid her to come"

"And what did you want me to do?" he muttered, more upset than he would have liked, and he had to take a deep breath before speaking again, “She's… was impulsive and… she doesn't measure the danger she's putting herself in. She is like a child, without conscience or limits”

“We all know that, but you called her stupid. That's very different."

“I don't want her to end up killing herself,” he said, and Inej caught a hint of sincere concern tinging her friend's voice. Kaz hated seeing himself like this, but there was something about her that made him trust her with that part of him. “Y/N acts with her heart, that's the problem. And I worry that she doesn't know how to control it. I don't want anyone to hurt her and she just doesn't cooperate” he sounded desperate, helpless, and then Inej realized how many things were being ignored by the team about the boss's decisions, apparently cruel, but quite considered in the background. It was like… acting badly for the right reasons. Or something like that.

“Well, if you really do this to safeguard her welfare, you should tell her. Because I don't think you're giving him the right message with your actions” Inej told him. Then she decided that she wasn't going to pry into the matter anymore from that point on, wishing that the conversation had been enough to make the black-haired man see reason.

He thought about it for a second and wished he could ask her more, but then he noticed that, as always, she had already vanished into the night.

Kaz tried very hard to focus on the robbery and stop thinking about you or what it would be wise to say to you, but he was having some trouble. In the next hour, to everyone's surprise in general, things went perfectly; there was no guard, just a driver who didn't resist, and they were coming back with some juicy loot. Almost too easy to be true.

Kaz didn't give much thought to the nature of the success they'd just had and they all just set off, their group spirits much better now that things were looking up.

It would be foolish to deny that Kaz had been thinking about how quickly you would have managed to carry out the robbery and also had missed the joking duo that you formed with Jesper, who now had barely looked at the blue-eyed man.

On the way he got a bit withdrawn and was mentally torturing himself about what was the right thing to do when he got home. After thinking it through, he concluded that he should take Inej’s advice and talk to you to fix things. Brekker wasn't used to apologizing, but at least he could explain things to you the way he had with the girl, so that you would understand better and hopefully forgive him for the idiotic behavior he had been displaying for the past few weeks. Although he was still upset, it was worth putting that aside to try.

After going to the club to save the cash they went back to The Slat and when he stood in front of your door he never thought to feel more nervous in life, while he started to ask himself if that was a good idea. Maybe he should just let time wash away your bad face and carry on as before... but he was also aware that that wouldn't happen.

He hesitated for a long time about whether to knock on your door or not, but after a few minutes he finally did and was frustrated when no one answered, despite a strip of light coming through the door grate.

"Y/N, I know you’re there" he tried, but there was no response. Kaz ran a gloved hand through his hair and exhaled in frustration. "Fine, don't talk to me if you want, but that's not going to stop me from coming to tell you what I came to say," he muttered determinedly. Even trying to communicate assertively, he couldn't help but sound rude. “I didn't mean to yell at you like that when we got back from the heist, I just didn't know what else to do. And today I asked you to stay here because it could be dangerous and I'm trying to take care of you because apparently you don't give a damn about your own life, not because I hate you or because I'm upset with you. It's just that…” he was having a hard time talking, so he had to take a deep breath to collect himself a little “I worry about you. And I want you to be okay. Safe"

Kaz was silent, waiting for you to say something, but again there was nothing. He felt so foolish and embarrassed that he even thought his eyes were going to glaze over with helplessness. He was trying his best to go there, but you didn't seem to care, and honestly, he didn't blame you.

His gaze lowered to the floor, the pressing sensation of rejection flooding his chest, and only then did he notice the glow emanating from a section of the floor. With difficulty he knelt to take the substance with his fingers and his glove was stained with a fine powder that gave off an iridescent glow, which until that moment he had not realized he was scattered over various sections of the corridor. And next to that dust, there was a bloodstain.

Kaz didn't even wait for a second to lunge at your bedroom door and yank it open, which he hadn't done before out of respect for your privacy, only to realize that everything in there was turned upside down. There were remains of a smashed nightstand, books scattered on the floor, the bed in disarray, and sporadic stains of blood that he prayed weren't yours. The window was wide open and the white curtain billowed violently in the night air.

Someone had broken into your room and it wasn't hard to put the pieces together to find out what they had broken into. Someone had kidnapped you.

His eyes traveled all over the place looking for something that would give him clues and he decided to start rummaging through the books hoping to find a note, the amount for your ransom, whatever. When he read ‘We're even, Brekker’ written on yellowed paper and signed with the seal of a snake, he felt that his balance was missing.

That's why the robbery of the carriage had been so easy, because they had wanted it that way. Their plan was always to enter The Slat. You were there, alone, and they kidnapped you because Kaz had allowed it. Because in his eagerness to protect you, he had delivered you directly to the enemy.

It was all his fault.

"Jesper!" he screamed, on first impulse. He didn't know if it was difficult for him to get up from the floor due to dizziness or because of the limp “Inej! Wylan! Whoever!" he continued, wanting to get the attention of anyone who could help him. He was in a panic and he was also furious. He would be capable of torturing the men who had kidnapped you in the most horrible ways ever seen, as soon as he found out who they were.

All the people present in the building followed the sound of the boss's wailing and when they observed the state of your room a collective sigh of surprise filled the silence.

"Where is Y/N?"

“I don't know,” Kaz hissed, sounding desperate. That didn't even matter to him anymore "They took her, they set us up"

“We have to find her,” Matthias muttered, and he wanted to hit him for saying something so obvious. But he had to calm down, for everyone's sake.

"There's blood and this in the hallway," said the black-haired man, showing everyone the dust that still glittered on his glove.

"It's a trail," Wylan exclaimed, his features lighting up like when he had an idea. He stepped forward to analyze the sample and then nodded. “I gave this to her, it's a bioluminescent powder we were experimenting with. In theory, when…" he walked around the room as if looking for something until he found a box of matches that you had lying around "it comes into contact with the fire, it emits a blue flame" he explained, going into the corridor and demonstrating the information practically.

There was hope, if they hadn't taken you too far your friends might track you down and rescue you. You had been scared enough to leave a clue because you knew they would look for you.

In that moment Kaz felt so guilty that he had ever even suggested that he doubted your abilities.

“You have to follow it. We have to find where they took her right now” he ordered and, of course, no one argued. Everyone went ahead to get the necessary things to look for you and Kaz leaned against the wall for a moment, breathing slowly in an attempt to contain one of those panic attacks he sometimes felt, not imagining that this would only be the beginning of an awful night. 

And the worst wasn’t over yet.

The crows moved faster and more efficiently than ever before, and within minutes Wylan had figured out how to follow the trail. Sometimes there were long lines through the streets that were lit with a single match, but other times they had to look for them more carefully and that consumed time that Kaz considered vital. Although he wasn't saying anything the others could tell that he was quite upset by the situation, so they did their best. Also, you were part of the group, so they too were extremely worried.

By the time they reached Fifth Harbor, Kaz was already burning all the way down his leg, but that didn't matter to him. They were all out of breath, but that didn't matter. And the trail ended right at the pier, but that didn't matter because they saw in the distance a boat with two robust men, one of them holding a lamp and the other struggling with a girl tied by her hands and legs who was screaming in despair.

It was you and you were yelling Kaz's name.

They rushed to find a boat tied to the dock big enough for the six of them and when, luckily, they found it they jumped on it. Matthias and Jesper were in charge of rowing and the movement did not go unnoticed by the men who had you captured, nor by you.

A feeling of relief swept through you as you realized that the silhouettes approaching you were your friends and you felt that all was not lost. Kaz thought that they had arrived just in time and that calmed him down for a second, but he didn't count on the fact that the man would lift you off the ground and, with a sharp gesture that surprised everyone, he would throw you straight into the sea.

Your cry was drowned out by the roar of the water and the black-haired man's breath caught, while everything around him was spinning again. Until then he realized the position he was in: in the middle of the immensity of the sea, in danger of drowning. It was then that the memories of his brother's body came back to him like needles sticking in and he felt like he might vomit.

Kaz didn't know how to swim and even if he had known how to at some point in his life it was now impossible due to his limping leg. But he wasn't going to let you die. He can’t.

In the midst of the attack, he was dimly aware of what was happening. You were now within safe distance of the other boat which allowed Inej to throw a knife at one of the men and Jesper took it upon himself to put a bullet into the other. In hindsight, Kaz would have wished they had stayed alive so he could take it upon himself to give them a slow and painful death. There was no point in letting the men who had kidnapped you die so mercifully.

The water was dark and they couldn't see anything, but still Matthias was the one who ventured below the surface to find your body, hoping that when he did it wouldn't be too late.

Nina kept her hands up to monitor the beating of both your hearts and the rest stood without saying anything, looking expectantly out at the water that rolled in small waves. Only Kaz's erratic breathing broke the silence of the environment.

A few seconds passed, and when there was no sign of him or you, concern gripped the group. Now there wasn’t only the fear that you wouldn't get out of the water, but also that Matthias wouldn't and thus lose two members of the group. Nina winced when she heard one of the heartbeats slowed down considerably, though she didn't comment on it to the others.

When he finally surfaced everyone was relieved to see that he wasn't alone, even if your body was just an unconscious bundle that he was pulling with difficulty.

They still put you in the canoe and you had your limbs tied with rope, so Inej was in charge of cutting them with a knife, while the others crowded around you to try to see how you were.

“She's not breathing,” Matthias gasped. Nina knelt to try to expel the water from your lungs, but for some reason your body was resisting. If she didn't get the water out of your lungs, the lack of oxygen would permanently affect your brain.

"This isn't working," she snorted after several hand movements.

It was only then that Kaz dared to look at you. You were pale, wet, and a trickle of blood was coming from your forehead and you had some bruises. He never thought that he would feel the same pain that he seized when he traveled to the coast with the lifeless body of his brother.

Wake up, he wanted to tell you, but his voice wouldn't come out. You have to wake up.

Nina kept trying and until he finally saw you jump up to vomit up the salt water, he too felt like he could breathe again.

When you finally finished inhaling the air around you everyone bombarded you with questions to check your well-being and you just nodded to them all, a little dazed and scared. Nina took it upon herself to help with the cut and bruises, while the men took up the oars again to reach the dock.

Kaz was the last to get off the boat and he was also the last to enter The Slat, as if he needed to check that the rest of you had done it, since he didn't want to leave anyone behind again. Never.

“Let me accompany you,” he said. It was the first thing he had said to you after the incident and you were so exhausted that you didn't offer any resistance. When you walked up the stairs and into your room, you thought Kaz would leave without another word, but instead he stood in front of the door.

You looked at him with a neutral expression, trying to understand what he was trying to do.

"You were very intelligent" he began to say "When you left the trail"

"Thank you," you said quietly. Your throat was a bit sore from the water you had swallowed.

"How it happened?" he asked. The trip had made you recover a bit and you were calmer than before, so you didn't mind telling him things.

“They were supposed to be looking for your office, but they saw my light on and thought it would be a better idea to go after the helpless damsel. They got in through the window and… voila,” you said bitterly, gesturing with one hand at the mess around you. “They held me here and tied me to a chair, but the knots were so painful I got free in a few minutes. They interrogated me to ask about things of value or obtain some information, but I didn't say anything. My fighting could irritate them, but I think I really pissed them off when I smashed a vase over the head of one and plunged a knife into the other's leg. Maybe that's why they decided to throw me into the sea”

Kaz was a bit dismayed at how calmly you said things and he wondered if you really didn't care or were just pretending. Although he wanted to say the same things to you that he had said to your empty room a few hours ago, the truth was that remembering it made him feel ashamed. It had been a sincere apology, but he didn't think he could say it twice.

"I'm sorry I put you in danger," he said, stepping forward for more privacy. He watched your reaction to what he said and what he did, hoping that if you were still upset you would show it. But the near-death experience seemed to soften both of you.

"Why apologize? you didn't send those guys. It was just some… being in the wrong place at the wrong time. It could have happened to anyone."

“I know, but maybe if I hadn't asked you to stay here, they wouldn't have hurt you” he admitted and although you wanted to recriminate him for that, you decided to remain silent, feeling curious as to how far he could go with that talk "And if you don't… if you hadn't been smart right now you wouldn't be here”

"But I am" you answered with determination "And that's what hurts me, Kaz, that you doubt me" you expressed. You weren't going to forget so easily what had made you walk away in the first place and you thought it was the right time for him to know what you thought about it “I made a mistake, it's true and I take responsibility for that. But you didn't have to treat me like this."

"I know that too," he hastened to say, "I don't doubt you, I never have."

“It is not noticeable. Today you pushed me aside and you told us that trust is always the most important thing. And although I was stupid, I consider that this behavior is not worthy of making you stop trusting me just like that. You know I didn't do it to screw you over, I just wanted to save her."

“It's not about that woman, I don't care about her. You know that I too would have prevented her from getting hurt if the situation arose."

“Then what is it about? Is it only the mistake of the century if I make it?”

“This is about you, Y/N” Kaz said, pointing at you with his open palm and starting to sound desperate “I got so mad because you were the one who ended up in the hands of the enemy. I hate that you act like that because I care about you too much to allow myself to lose you”

You didn't expect that and he didn't expect to say it either. It was even more embarrassing than what he had refused to tell you in the first place.

He said that he didn't want to lose you and you thought about the meaning of that expression: did he not want to lose what you brought to the team or did he not want to lose your person?

"These weeks I thought you only hated me because I made you lose money"

"Oh, I do hate you a little for that," he said, taking a surprise "Not for the money itself, but for what that money implied" there was no point in keeping secrets, if Kaz had already started to sink then he preferred to do it completely and with dignity “The club is going through some difficulties, Y/N. I sold those things so I could keep it going. Because while our criminal jobs give us some kruge, you know that the main source of income for that group is the Crow Club. Also…” he felt his breath shake and had to take a moment to calm down “I've been thinking about something these past few months. A long time ago you said that you had always wanted to go to university, do you remember?” he asked you and you nodded your head “Jesper had the opportunity, but he is a lost cause, because he prefers this kind of life to having an office job or a quiet home and I respect that. But not you, you ended up here because you had no other options” Kaz was silent, hoping that if you had something to say you would say it now, but then he continued, “And I thought if I gave you some money you would have that opportunity. That way I could get you away from all these Dregs and you'd live the way you wanted. That's why that robbery was important”

You were totally stunned.

You never expected Kaz to have that opinion of you or even care about you to the degree that he had just confessed to you. He had listened to you, had seen beyond the apparent happiness of living in The Barrel to find your true dreams, so forgotten within yourself that you no longer thought you could reveal them to anyone else.

You mistakenly believed that the only thing that mattered to Kaz Brekker was dying suffocated by piles of money, but you had just realized that the true engine of life of the black-haired man was the love he had for that peculiar family that you made up.

“You… you know that's not necessary, right? You don’t have to do it"

"But I wanted"

The gap was less since Kaz had walked towards you and you decided, venturing a bit, to take another step towards him.

"Why didn't you tell us that the club has financial problems?" you asked softly, because you thought there could be no other way to talk to him in a situation like this.

"Because it wasn't important"

"Yes, it is, Kaz" you walked in his direction again. At that distance, if you raised your hand a little, he could reach to take hers "That's the point, you decide to swallow all the problems without talking to anyone and then we have no idea what ails you or why this or that is so important. Jesus, if you had told me that money was so vital, I would have put my life into opening that vault as quickly as possible” it was at that moment that you really regretted what you had done and thought that, if possible, you would have returned in time to listen to him and not just your instincts.

"It does not matter anymore. I can't spend my life telling you all the bad things that happen around here."

“You should do it, Kaz. We are a group and we can't just enjoy the rewards without knowing the sacrifice, stop burdening yourself with that alone” he warned seriously “You take care of all of us, but then who takes care of you?”

His reaction was the same as you had a moment ago: stupefaction. Kaz didn't know at what point in his life he had to become that, but he thought that perhaps Jordie's death was decisive for him to have to fulfill the role of the person he had just lost. To be for others what no one had been for him, so they would not suffer what he had suffered. It was quite an altruistic act if he thought better of it.

But after so many years it was exhausting and he wished he could just fall into someone else's arms to rest, figuratively speaking. And there you were right in front of him, probably the person he loved the most, with an expression that reflected a willingness to listen to what he had to say.

So Kaz thought that, maybe for once, it was okay for him to be vulnerable.

“I had an older brother” he murmured, after a long while and you were a bit confused by the sudden change of subject, but you nodded your head so he knew you were listening “He died during the plague epidemic. And miss him so much"

You knew little, if anything, of the personal life of the man in front of you, so you didn't know how to react to the disclosure of that fact. You imagined a little Kaz, scared and sad because his brother was gone. You didn't think for a second about the horrible things he had to go through and that he, with some luck, would dare to tell you later.

But even with this paltry piece of information you couldn't help but feel enormous compassion. He was human, like everyone else, and he was afraid that death would come to take another person important to him. Now you understood better.

"What was his name?" you asked in a whisper, as gently as possible. Kaz was silent for a moment, reflecting no sentiment, then swallowed.

"Jordie"

You weren't going to ask him any more questions after that, you just looked into his eyes and you knew that this was his way of telling you that he trusted you to keep that shred of his past.

"Well, I think Jordie would be happy to know that now there are six of us who love you as he did" was what you replied. You didn't know if it was the answer he expected, but at least it was the one that had come from your heart. When he looked at you, you swore that his eyes were teary, although later you convinced yourself that it had only been an effect of the light.

"I hope we're fine now" he murmured, regaining his composure, referring to the problems that had existed between you after that discussion.

"Calm down, everything is fine. I know you can't live without me."

"Actually, I've had enough of Jesper seeing me with those murder-eyes."

"Then you noticed," you joked. You were completely exhausted and at that moment you were even more conscious, as if you were going to pass out the next second “Everything is fine” you repeated “I just hope this doesn't happen again. I… will try to be less impulsive. And you have to tell me if something's wrong and we'll figure it out, okay?"

Kaz hummed back and you put on a tight-lipped smile. Then you looked around you to analyze the chaos that had been left by the fight with those men, feeling exhausted just thinking that you would have to pick up the pieces of wood, the books, or clean the stains, and he realized what you were thinking by the look on your face.

“I'll send someone to clean all this up tomorrow, I promise. For now, you just… lie down”

"For the first time, I'm not going to argue with you," you laughed bitterly. Then a yawn invaded you and you felt your eyelids tremendously heavy, which he perceived. Kaz didn't want to leave there, even if you were on the verge of exhaustion, however, he didn't know what excuse to use to stay “Good night, Kaz. You should rest too"

"Yeah, um... I'll do it"

“Good”

There was silence for a few seconds. 

"Have you really forgiven me?" he asked, looking to make sure you weren't upset anymore. You smiled and, amid your delirium from exhaustion, you stood on your toes to kiss him on the cheek. He paled and held his breath, but you didn't notice.

“As much as you have forgiven me for screwing up the mission. Now go and sleep"

Perhaps it was the shock of receiving something like this from you that caused Kaz to practically run out of your room, without even saying goodbye, staying in the hallway for a moment to process things. The speed of the contact hadn't given him time to panic, but that didn't stop him from feeling the pumping of his heart hammering like crazy under his chest and hot cheeks under the memory of your lips on them.

When he locked himself in his room he tried to calm down, when he was taking off his clothes to put on his pajamas he tried again, washing his hands and face, going through paperwork before going to sleep, lying down on the bed, closing the eyes... but nothing worked.

And eventually he fell asleep with the ghost of your kiss haunting him through dreams.

[firelxdykatara]

Dragon Age 4 looks amazing, that gameplay trailer had me on the edge of my seat and I cannot fucking wait for the game to drop. Somewhat less enthused for the inevitable wave of fandom discourse that's gonna rear it's ugly head, especially given how BG3 went over, but whatever. (Also I hate that the name changed to 'The Veilguard', not just because 'Dreadwolf' was cool as fuck but the 'the' throws things off. DAV looks better as an acronym than DATV. But whatever whatever no one consulted ME on this, it's fine, I'm fine.)

It did make me start thinking about Solas again and how little nuance the fandom approached him with last time, and it's just funny because like... it's very easy to understand where Solas is coming from. How he sees what he is planning as necessary, as fixing an ancient wrong that he has always meant to put right.

Will people die? Yes, and he thinks that's unfortunate--and, according to him in the trailer, he took the precautions he could to minimize that loss of life as much as possible. But he's not doing any of this with the specific aim to kill people or 'do genocide'--that was never his goal.

He is trying to fix something that he broke countless ages ago.

As he says, 'the veil is a wound'--a wound that he ripped open in the very fabric of space and time, and which he is trying now to heal.

And the thing is, he is ancient. He does not conceive of time the way mortals do, nor the importance and significance of mortal lives. I would like to think that romanced solas vs unromanced will have some affect on the way he goes about things, because falling in love was entirely unexpected and had to alter his views at least a little. Not enough to sway him from his course, but perhaps enough to make him feel the coming losses more keenly than he otherwise would. But even failing that, the connections he made during Inquisition are clearly not nothing to him--Varric is able to draw his attention, keep him distracted, might even have been on the verge of talking him down, we don't know. But as easily as he shattered Bianca, he could've killed Varric to end the threat he posed, and he didn't.

Mortal lives mean something to him now that they didn't when he set out at the beginning of Inquisition to tear down the veil with no regard for the mortal lives he would destroy in the process. And I'm wondering if those very safeguards are what release the big bads when Rook fucks up his ritual and that leads into the rest of the game. But anyway, my point is this: Solas does not look at life the way someone with a mortal lifespan does. He can't! Modern Thedas is the burned out shell of a building that he once set fire to without realizing what the consequences would be--and he is determined to rebuild it, because no matter what life has sprung up in the cracks of the burned out husk, his original fault was destroying the life that had been there to begin with.

People don't tend to overly worry about the insects and birds nests and whatever else they might have to bulldoze through when it comes to tearing down some condemned structure and rebuilding in its place, and that's how Solas views the modern world of Thedas and the lives within it. And I get disagreeing with him and wanting to stop him at any cost, but I don't get assigning maliciousness or bloodthirst to his motivations when there's no reason to believe he sees this as anything less than a tragic necessity.

Then again, I think Anders was right too so, y'know. But one bomb lobbed into the fandom commonroom at a time lmao.

[cainluvr69]

Let Me Tell You The Story Of A Rainbow - Chapter 14

Previous Chapter

Rutile: She…leaps into the books pages…?

Aslan: Yes. Drawing like that is how she creates her works.

Chloe: Diving directly into her art to work on it sounds kind of fun…

Aslan: Yes, it was something she enjoyed very much, or at least that's how it seemed to me. Luca's books are both her own creative work as well as a place for her to play and explore freely. …Her books were a place she could escape to and spread her wings without anyone passing judgment on the world she lived in. She'd been wandering the world completely alone, but at least she had her books to hide herself away in. But once one of her books is completed, the world inside of it gets locked away, so she always starts on the next one right away… That's how she's written so many books. …However…

Aslan covered his face, as if he didn't want us to see him…or perhaps, he didn't want to see us. A shaky, trembling sigh slipped out from between his fingers.

Aslan: For some reason, she hasn't been able to finish her current work, and the world within it hasn't been locked away… And if it stays open, that world is going to keep spilling out of its pages and completely consume this castle. If that happens…if Luca gets blamed for all of this happening, then she might lock her heart away from other people again. I don't want Luca to push herself past her limits, but at the same time, the world in this book needs to get locked away… And despite that fact, the girl herself is nowhere to be found.

As soon as Aslan said that, sparkling rainbow scales began to flicker and dance around him.

Akira: Roxy…?

The scales wavered, like a shyly offered invitation, and then they drifted over to the book in question. Their gentle rainbow glittering grew sharper, stronger, and then the cover of the book opened--whatever the scales belonged to was rifling through the pages, flipping through them, trying to find something specific… And it ended up being the final page.

Akira: Oh, this is…!

The last page had none of the beautiful illustrations the other pages had; there wasn't even a sketch or basic outline. Instead, the page was a stark black. It looked as if someone had slammed their paintbrush onto the page angrily, over and over and over. Even I, magicless as I was, could feel all of the fear and loneliness that had been painted onto this page.

Rutile: …I can feel Luca's presence on the other side of the page.

Nero: Yeah… It doesn't feel like she's feelin' calm or peaceful, either.

Chloe: Wh-what should we do… Should we go back to the manor and ask for help?

Cain: This seems a lot more serious than we thought. I'm not sure we have time to go back.

Akira: If Mithra was here, we could ask him to make a door between here and the manor, but…

Rutile: Oh!

Rutile suddenly gasped, and then with a flicker of magic, pulled something out of nowhere. It looked like…a taxidermied bird.

Nero: Ew, what is that disgusting thing?

Cain: It smells kind of weird…

Chloe: That's the whistle that Mithra gave you before we left for the Southern holy festival!

Nero: That thing's a whistle?

Rutile: Yep. Mithra gave it to me a while ago as a sort of protective charm. All I have to do is put the tail in my mouth and blow, and he'll come running!

Rutile took a deep, deep breath and put the taxidermied tail-looking part into his mouth, and blew into it with all his might. As he did, the bird sang its song loudly, as if it had come back to life. It took only a moment after for the outline of a door to draw itself in the air and materialize right before our eyes.

Mithra: Did something happen?

As Mithra asked his question, I could see several wizards behind him, peeking through the door after him. It looked like…he'd been in Shylock's bar in the manor when he'd made the door.

Rutile: Mithra!

Akira: Um, so about the exhibition hall…!

Chloe: Eek!!

Right as I was about to explain what was going on here, I heard Chloe's little shriek from behind me. I whipped around, and what greeted me was the sight of a long vine that had creeped out of the picture book's pages and wrapped itself around one of Aslan's legs.

Aslan: It-it's pulling me in…!

Chloe: Don't worry! I'm absolutely definitely not going to let go of you, so don't worry…ah, wahhh…?!

Cain: Chloe!

Nero: Hey!

Nero shouted and reached out to grab them, but the only thing he got a hold of was empty air. Aslan and Chloe, who really didn't let go of Aslan's hand, had already been dragged into the picture book.

Akira: Chloe and Mister Aslan were…!

Cain: Dammit!

Rutile: I'm going in after them!

Nero: Wha… Hey, wait, wait a sec!

But Cain and Rutile had already dived into the book's pages without a single moment of hesitation.

Mithra: Excuse me?!

Bradley: What the hell's all the yelling about? Woah, this place looks crazy.

Murr: The castle interior's gone all funky!

Shylock: Things seem rather tense over there.

The twins poked their heads through the gaps in the crowd beyond the doorframe, grabbing Mithra before he jumped into the book after Rutile.

Snow: My goodness!

White: This seems serious, now doesn't it.

Akira: Snow, White! Everyone got pulled into the book…!

Snow: Goodness… That's a full-fledged crisis!

White: Sage's wizards, it's time to…

Snow & White: Get all hands on deck!

Mithra: Tch… <Arthim>

Mithra recited his spell, and just like that, all of the wizards that weren't already on the scene appeared one after the other.

Shino: Huh?!

Lennox: Is this…the exhibition hall…?

Nero: We'll explain later! For right now, we need t' get into that picture book…

As Nero was speaking, I felt someone grab my hand--and that someone was Murr. I found myself ensnared by his emerald eyes, as if we were in a world of our own, separate from the panicked voices and movement around us.

Murr: Interesting things always happen with a bang, don't they! Now come, Master Sage. Let's goooo! Right into the world inside the book!

Akira: Wah…!

Murr leapt, still holding my hand…and even though I didn't jump with him, my body floated into the air anyways, as if I had been captured by his magnetic pull. Once we were in the air, the page that had been violently smeared with black began to glow, just faintly--and then, we crossed the boundary.

✦✧☾✧✦

I was overwhelmed by the fear that we'd just leapt into a bottomless pit…and yet, at the same time, I felt the content certainty that there was a soft and fluffy bed just below me, waiting for me to land on it and curl up all cozy. I gripped Murr's hand as tightly as I could, a solid beacon for me in the middle of these feelings I'd never had before. And then, the darkness popped like a bubble, surrounding us with a burst of light. We were in the world on the other side of the pages, and that world… …smelled softly of the forest.

✦✧☾✧✦

Cain: Master Sage…!

I stumbled and fell to my knees on soft grass, and that was when I heard Cain call out to me. I looked up, and there he was--as were Aslan, Chloe, and everyone else who'd crossed the boundary into the book, regardless of if they'd jumped in on purpose or if they'd been dragged in against their will.

Akira: Cain! Everyone else is with you, too…!

I rushed over to them as fast as I could, worried that they might've gotten hurt--but all of them were perfectly okay and unharmed. I sighed in relief, putting a hand to my chest. While I was doing that, the other wizards that had been summoned at Mithra's call alighted on the grass around us one after the other, making their entrance into the world inside the book.

Mithra: Rutile… Oh, good. I keep telling you not to be so impulsive.

Rutile: I'm sorry. I just couldn't stand by and do nothing after I saw that happen… But having you come after me makes me feel better about all of this. I'm glad I took good care of that whistle you gave me!

Mithra: Sigh… You're so carefree…thoughtless, even…

Rustica: Why, it's a perfect day for experiencing something as invaluable as stepping into the world within a picture book. On that subject, are these outfits a pleasant surprise from Chloe? I feel as if I've become one of the characters of this story.

Chloe: Mm-mm. It wasn't me! I was really startled when I suddenly got pulled in here, but I'm happy that it means I get to wear such splendid clothes…! Everyone's outfits suit them so well. Don't you agree, Master Sage?

Chloe's bright and cheery voice made me realize that all my wizards--and even I myself--had become clad in outfits definitely suited for wandering in Luca's wonderland.

Akira: Yes. Everyone looks wonderful! I think everyone's hats are especially nice.

Murr: Yeah, this is pretty great! We look exactly like storybook wizards should!

Shylock: Fufu. I suppose that means we should take care to act more wizardesque than we typically would.

Bradley: Tch. You freaks were forced to change clothes by the immature magic in this book, and you're just laughin' it up about it.

Nero: I mean, it's not so awful that I'd go outta my way to get rid of 'em, but… Wearin' this kinda pure n' pristine white clothing makes me feel sorta nervous.

Owen: It takes some real guts to mess with Northern wizards with this kind of magic. But I suppose it suits you little ones pretty well. It's like you're all dressed up for a kiddie stageplay.

Bradley: Yeah? Maybe you should remember you're an old hag in frills before y'start talkin' like that.

Shino: Don't worry. All three of you are old.

Bradley & Owen & Nero: Excuse me?

Lennox: Your new clothes suit you well, Lord Faust.

Faust: As do yours. It seems the world inside this book has some rules we're being forced to follow.

Heathcliff: Yeah… Looks like we can still use our magic, though.

Figaro: I wonder if it was only Luca's magic that made this world expand as far as it has… I feel a bit uneasy. If the magic that creates a pocket dimension like this is unstable, it makes that dimension very brittle.

Snow: Very true. A wizard with the right level of power should be able to easily eliminate any magical interference, like these clothes, but…

White: For the time being, let's just let the effects of this spell wash over us.

Mitile: I can't believe we're really inside of a picture book… It's kinda unbelievable.

Riquet: It is. It's a strange and peculiar but beautiful world, just like the one we saw in the illusions conjured up when we opened our book, but…

Riquet looked at the world around him, seeming somehow disoriented and confused.

Akira: Everything seems like it's darker…it's all smudged and faded.

Figaro: Yeah, the picture book we were given was a lot more vivid than this. I wonder if this world is stagnating���or decaying…

Shino: It's pretty obvious just looking at it that something's up. Instead we should be asking why all of us are here at all.

Akira: R-right! I'm sorry. I summoned you all here, but I haven't even explained what's going on yet.

I summarized the details of how we'd all ended up here inside a book. I told them about the rainbow scales that had shown up at the manor, how we'd followed them here to the exhibition hall, and about the castle interior's strange transformation.

Arthur: What I saw of the hall before being pulled into the book definitely had an odd air to it, but to think this is what's causing it…

Nero: Yeah. The world inside this book started spillin' out, and now it's corrupted the whole castle.

Rustica: I see, I see. I had simply been assuming the hall had been dolled up for the party being held on the last day of the exhibition.

Mitile: So if we want the hall to go back to normal, the picture book needs to be finished…so do we need to go looking for Luca?

Aslan: Yes… Once this book is completed, the world will be locked down, and it'll become nothing more than a storybook that shows its readers illusions of what's inside. The fact that we were able to enter it means that it's probably not finished yet. So Luca should be somewhere in here…

Oz: …If you are looking for the girl, she is right there.

Oz gestured beyond the expanse of flowers around us, towards a place that seemed like the central point of the field, the source of the flowers that swirled out around us.

Next Chapter

[scuddle-bubble101]

Lets go random again! Someone else for fun fact time?

(So the wheel seems to like Eli- This is twice now. So Eli fact times I guess X'D I got so, so distracted X'DD!)

Facts about Eli!

. Raised primarily by an academic branch he doesn't quite even remember, Eli doesn't recall even having parents or "people" in his life once. Considered pretty much a failure from the start, he never held on or expected much from older people. Matter of fact, he really wasn't raised much either, it's actually a mystery how he seems "fine" despite it. Some of his childhood consisted of quite the confusion too, he always received gifts and baked goods on his birthday.

. He's jumpy at best, naturally his main trait if we had to explain him with one. Constantly feels like he's being watched and can't reason with it. Worst bet is that he's probably right. To be straight to the point, he's never had "luck" on his side, always drawing some kind of bad with the good. "The glass is always going to be at least somewhat empty even if you try to fill it full."

. Unfortunately, he sticks out like a sore thumb, looking damn near like someone poured spots for a cheetah and cheese sauce on his ears. Doesn't help either that he's gifted in fire magic, he can't for the life of him explain how he got it, he just "does." His temper can flare too, it'll make his fire and items rather red and can leave his eye-sight rather fuzzy. (he hates with this happens)

. Being trained by Pj (Exclusive's son) by all things. Jams of course, didn't want any chance to teach him but realizing the kid really lacked a social figure, he kind a caved. (Don't tell him we said that) Naturally, this made him protective over Eli, making sure to shield him and keep him out of trouble if he can help it. Eli's never really had a positive adult figure in his life so all he can comment on it, is that it is a bit weird to have a guy just... Make sure you've eaten enough today. Stars, He's even met his boss's wife. What he's being trained for is really important though!! Classic knew it was best to leave him with Jams-jams. (And honestly, he's right.)

. He's a little accident prone. NOT thankfully, like a certain cheeto-haired boy :]! Ok, at least he doesn't have two left feet like A CERTAIN BIRD EITHER. He doesn't claim they are friends but Crash will find any excuse to purposely dive bomb him. (Poor Eli)

. Did you see something beside him? Looks like it becomes "visible sometimes"... No, you didn't see anything, trick of the light you see?

. His ears a pull-able, yes he will whine like a puppy if you do so.

. He has light up sketchers. They are opposite colors and if he's feeling silly, he'll tap them together to get them to glow. (A lad can have his little fun times ok?)

. He does not actually like peanut butter. We'll say it might be a texture issue.

[foodandfolklore]

The Story of Valentine's Day

So what's up with Valentine's Day? Is it just a holiday made up to sell flowers, chocolate, and jewelry? Well...no. Though it is the main reason why it's still exists today. So much so that Valentine's Day is banned in some countries that frown on western customs. Other Countries adopted their own customs inspired by Valentines Day, like in Japan. Women are the ones to give men they like chocolate on February 14. Then, in March, these men are expected to gift them white chocolate in return.

I think many of us who grew up in the west are aware that Valentine's Day is named after the Catholic Saint Valentine. An older name is 'The feast of St Valentine' since before chocolate and flowers, people had a feast to celebrate. But who was this person?

The story goes that Valentine (Could of been a man or woman, we're not sure. There were a lot of Valentines) was spreading the word of the Christian God and Jesus as a Priest. They went against the Emperor's decree, and married soldiers to their loved ones. I'm not entirely clear why the Emperor had an issue with soldiers getting married, but I'm guessing the lead in the pipes were getting to them.

Valentine was found out and arrested, and was sentenced to death. While they awaited their sentencing, they helped take care of the other prisoners. The jailer's daughter, who was blind, was also there (for some reason) and they helped to look after her. They did such a good job, they cured her blindness and fell in love with her. Before being put to death, they gave her a letter simply signed "From your Valentine" thus being the official first Valentine.

The Church later named Valentine a Saint, and degreed a celebration to happen every year on February 14. Which is apparently when they were executed. However, there was also an old Roman celebration that the Church was trying to get rid of called "Lupercalia". Lupercalia was a purifying, fertility celebration to Juno that lasted from February 13 to February 15. Animal sacrifices, naked racing, and a massive feast was held. The church didn't like 2 of these 3 main events, so their new holiday just had a feast.

We get the Romance later when a 14th century poet, Geoffrey Chaucer, writes his poem "Parlement of Foules". It draws a conection between Valentines Day and the start of Bird Mating season, sparking the romantic interest. Many couples followed for years after, sending poems to one another to express affection. Later, during the 1800s, when the printing press became a thing, pre made and pre written poems/rhymes were mass produced as cards. And people bought them.

So, in summery, Valentines Day seems to of been created by the Church to erase a Pagan Celebration. Then, Society decided to associate it with love. Which is kinda Sweet. But now we're in the age of consumerism, and it's another excuse to sell us stuff.

At the end of the day; If you don't want to celebrate Valentines Day, than don't. I've personally never gotten into it, even with Partners. Some people feel like it's a downer cause they're single. Others feel like there's too much pressure to be perfect. And some just can't justify the expense.

That said, if you WANT to celebrate modern Valentines Day, all the power to you! Some people love it, with or without a partner. So if that's your jam, and you can afford to go all out, do it! It makes you happy to get chocolate and flowers, or dress up and go out to eat. For some it's like a hobby. Someone once made the comparison to me like the super bowl. You look forward to it all year, buy a bunch of junk, and then enjoy with people who are also into it. Now, I'm not into sports either, but I understand the mindset. It's like Conventions or dressing up to go see the premier of a movie. Other people may not see the point, but you enjoy it so who cares?

[ambystoman]

Fyreon (Redo) (Emberonian)

Here we have the last main character, Fyreon. He is rather nonchalant and slow. He can be cold for a living fire and doesn't like being bothered. Pessimistic is one way to describe him and he just likes sleeping rather than dealing with pro-

"Keep it down, will you? I'm trying to sleep. I didn't ask you to write this thing anyway..."

Fyreon is an Emberonian, a species of fire elemental that is generally proficient with magic. He wears a set of hardened clay armor. This protects his fire body from being extinguished as well as protecting others from his flames. It is very heavy making him a slow but strong warrior.

Emberonians have a malleable body of fire and can fit in any kind of hollow object and use it as armor. Once inside, their bodies accommodate and create holes for their eyes and mouth. Once outside again, the object retakes its original form with no alterations.

He uses his staff to cast fire spells and the swirl on top is his Soul and the source of his magic. It is his main weapon. As mentioned in the previous post, I never programmed him so I don't have anything to show regarding his combat capabilities.

Those wisps around the top move and react to Fyreon as he casts spells and does attacks. They might seem alive but are simply projections of some sort. The bottom of his staff simply fades away.

Emberonians. All soldiers wear the same types of clay armor. All masks are one of a kind and belong to an individual for life.

Fyreon's diet consists of eating rocks and minerals like crystals. He is not allowed in jewelry stores anymore. He likes salamanders but laments not being able to swim or touch water with his real hands. He never takes off his armor much less his mask.

His mask gives him a lizard tongue.

Backstory

Fyreon is a captain. He leads his squadron into war against an evil race of water creatures. Both species compete for territory on a small planet where the landscape consists of arid deserts and valleys contrasting damp swamps and lakes. The Emberonians are slowly losing and having their territory purposefully flooded.

He is a strong leader and takes care of his people very well. He is loved by many and often seeks a quick and effective way to solve problems. He makes sure to show his best to his people in hopes of keeping everyone motivated and hopeful.

A good team

He hides his feelings of hopelessness and crushing sadness so nobody else would feel disillusioned. But what would happen if you suddenly lost your reason to keep a positive attitude but could not remember why? Would your true feelings come out? One day he would find out...

It is honestly very hard to talk much about the protagonists' backstories without having to deal with heavy spoilers. In short, all 3 lose their memories at the start of the game before meeting. Despite having no memories, their emotions remain.

Foul creature

Inspiration

Arguably my most popular character (or maybe it's Lima). He has quite the redesign history. Originally, he started out as some sort of bird magician guy. I had been playing a lot of Shovel Knight at the time and really liked Plague Knight. He seemed to have an axe as well instead of a staff. He also had nothing to do with fire.

I refined this concept and gave him sort of gill-like appendages to his mask. These would eventually become horns. I then would go back to the gill idea and outright make them gills instead and give him more axolotl characteristics.

His fire attributes were inspired by a drawing from an artist I really like. Panapana on twitter. Mainly this cool drawing of an Axolotl with fire gills. As soon as I saw this, I got the idea of making him a fire creature whose armor made him somewhat look like an axolotl but he himself wasn't one. Salamanders were closely associated with fire in ancient times so it kind of makes sense.

I never designed the other race of creatures Emberonians fight. Just like they are evil for his species, this race considers Emberonians evil the same way.

The very first fanart I ever got.

Fyreon means a lot to me and because of him I was able to make a really good friend. A lovely gift from @blaz-art

Um... You'll have to pay for that. Drawn by @blaz-art.

[yurki-posts]

Just some midnight vent art. Some context down below because I need this out of my chest.

Big warning tho, it's a lot of text and if you're going through some hard stuff, I highly recommend not to read it. There's nothing motivating there, just venting

In 2021 I got hospitalized for Anemia. Anemia is caused by a lack of iron in the body, and because of my very strong food selectivity, I dislike a lot of food, including almost all fruits and no vegetables (except potatoes). This is a part of my autism, but I didn't knew that at the moment.

Because of this, I slowly lost all my iron. A normal person would feel very dizzy and probably faint over any kind of physical activity and even have a heart attack if pushed too far (and also if their anemic state is very bad), but I was asymptomatic, which means I didn't had any symptoms of it, which made it impossible for my parents and doctors to tell something was wrong with me. This is why my Anemia wasn't noticed for 4 months, and yes it was bad back then.

On January, me and my family went to a far away place to watch some waterfalls. We had to walk a lot, and I mean A LOT. I remember feeling really tired and that the air was heavy, but I couldn't do anything really. Doctors said my heart should not have resisted the physical effort and I should've got a heart attack, but for some reason I didn't, and I just kept going.

Then, we skip all the way to 4 days before I got hospitalized, on March.

I was in gym class. We were doing some running from cone 1 to cone 2 and so on. We could take a break for a couple seconds after getting to cone 2 and then we should get back to cone 1. Gotta say, we also had other activities before that one, but I only remember this one honestly, but have that in mind because I was already tired from before.

It was my and other 4 childrens' turn to run to the cones. I, ofc, was the last one to get there, and I while running my stomach was hurting really bad because of my breathing. My sweat was cold and my lungs could not hold for much longer (or at least that's how it felt). I finally got to the cone. I usually would not lay down because I was embarrased to do it in front of my classmates, but I was so tired I didn't cared about that and just layed on the grass.

I close my eyes. I breath. I feel the warm sun hitting me and the noise surrounding me disappeared. All I could hear were the birds. I opened my eyes and saw them in the sky. I felt very calm, for once. It felt like I spent a lot of time just looking at the sky, but it really were just some seconds.

After I got hospitalized and I was saved (all while I was concious and awake), the doctor, red haired woman, came to me amd my mom, and told me with a straight face:

"I don't know how are you here. You did gymnastics on Thursday, your heart should had not be able to handle it"

I remembered that moment in gym class again. That would had been the perfect moment for me to die. Why I didn't die? Why my body refused to die? How? How it managed to survive without ANY iron for 4 months straight without even a symptom until the very end?

Funny, butt this reminds me of that line Mike says on Fnaf Sister Location:

"I should be dead, but i'm not"

I should be dead too, and now I have been trying to....end, what the anemia started. It's really hard rn, I don't want to go to school tomorrow, I don't want to wake up tomorrow.

All I want is wake up in that place. The olace i've drew myself in before. Where the birds fly without a care. I want to be like those birds, but life isn't fair ig.

oh and about the drawings, if something shows up in the drawings that I didn't mentioned here it's probably because my emotions were drawing at that moment, like, idk how to explain it but I just draw it without too much thought?, it feels so weird

[outeremissary]

14, 25, 26?

Thanks for the ask!! I'm sorry if these aren't going to be super thrilling answers, but some stuff I just don't hear much or don't remember well. ^^;;

[prompt]

14. Any favorite motifs

Haha. Have you noticed. That I like angels. And birds. And wings. And radiant light. And feathers. Do you think that's noticeable in what I draw. Kingmaker has really spoiled me for these- there are so many legitimate reasons to draw them, and I still feel like I'm not doing enough here. At the least, I feel like there's a lot more that I could be doing thematically that I'm not. But I think it's telling that as soon as I started regularly drawing Not Kingmaker stuff I just kept going with the wings- sometimes for Real Reasons, and sometimes... not really. It's my natural state. And I will draw More Wings in the future. This is a promise. I will continue to think about them and hopefully do more interesting and thoughtful things with them, haha.

And I also of course love flowers... I'm not a flower language knower, but I looooove drawing flowers and floral motifs.

25. Something your art has been compared to that you were NOT inspired by

Last summer while recovering from surgery I took an actual real figure drawing class, like in a real studio downtown with real people and real models. I had a lot of trouble adapting to the materials, the scale of the drawings (big...), and the idea of shading as one of the earliest parts of a sketch. I remember speaking to the instructor after class once about having trouble, and he was pretty nice about stuff even if it didn't help me all that much except to reduce the stress a little. But in that conversation I remember him saying my art (of which he had only seen the model drawings) had a comic book quality. That really surprised me, especially considering the context! I was trying very hard to do realism the best I could there, and besides that I have just never spent a lot of time with American comic books. Even the artists in that sphere who have styles I find really compelling and want to learn from are just not in my mind when I draw almost ever, and they certainly weren't when I was trying to sketch the model! It was interesting to hear though- one way or another, the graphic background I do have comes through that strongly both in how I interpret things into work that's not meant to be stylized and in how I work. I guess it stood out for better or worse that I leaned so heavily on lines ^^;;

26. What's a piece that got a wildly different interpretation from what you intended

I remember back in 2021 I did this sketch of Nyrissa and Tristian (I swear it is in fact from 2021 despite the post date. my art was slightly better and definitely more accurate to the game in 2022.) where Nyrissa had a hand under Tristian's chin, forcing Tristian to look her in the eyes. I don't really remember what was on my mind drawing that. I think consciously I was just looking for a typical domineering villain pose that seemed fun to draw- I like the idea of the power dynamic between them and I was interested in how that relationship had shaped the Tristian we see in game. Just doing a little thing to put that master/servant dynamic on paper was satisfying for me. Of course, the second I showed it to other people all the responses were like "this is so horny. you can't show me an image this horny." or "this is so horny, I don't know who I want to be." And at the start I think I was always like "noooooo it's super normal!! it's not horny at all!!!" But I think deep down it probably was a horny drawing, whether I did that consciously or not... And I've definitely leaned into that Vibe since then when I draw them together, haha.

That's not a very good story, but honestly I think I just have not seen a lot of interpretations of what I draw that were so different from what was on my mind that they were memorable. ^^;; I don't have a super great memory for this kind of thing though

[a-crash-in-time-collection]

Chapter 48: Gaming Break

It seemed whenever they tried to take a break anymore, something happened. It was almost driving the group of toppats insane. From the discovery of what happened to the first Moonjumper, to Macbeth's potential future with the second coming, to Platinum getting close to getting fried, it just was building up in the background. They just needed a break. Get away from the station properly, away from Subcon. It wasn't exactly the forest's fault, but it just felt convenient with how everything happened there.

That was the main reason they were at Dead Bird Studios that day. The Conductor wanted Hat Girl to come out and play a secondary role alongside Mu for one of his future movies. She took the opportunity, and some of the others managed to sneak their way to getting invited to tag along. Offering to be extras in the background so it wasn't as strange, and so it wasn’t just these two characters that were human while the vast majority of the others were birds. It was easy to do once they got there, just pretend to do things once the camera rolled.

That was what Mu got from them anyway. She just agreed to show up because she was offered money, an opportunity she didn't get too often. The only member who had seemingly shown up just for the heck of it was some Blake person. She didn't speak to them, didn't have time. She just focused on getting her scenes done. It did feel nice to talk with Hat Girl again. It felt like forever since they saw each other. If she didn't know about what happened to her, she never would have known anything was wrong.

Eventually, it was the end of the day. The toppats were getting ready to leave and Mu wanted to get out of there as quickly as well. She didn't know exactly why, she did like being around the group. For a bunch of criminals, they treated her well. But she didn't want them noticing that. Maybe that was why she found herself in such a hurry. Maybe. She just headed to the door while everyone was talking, reaching for the handle, before pausing. Was that... rain she could hear outside? That didn't seem right.

She opened the door a little bit, and it sounded like hell. There was roaring winds and clashes of thunder, rain pouring onto the sand. She quickly closed the door. "You gotta be kidding me." She mumbled aloud, drawing the attention of the others. "Eye of Shinoloko." She explained, and immediately the Conductor facepalmed with a mumble. She didn't blame the guy for being frustrated, even if he could camp here all night, two of his grandkids were with him today. Who knows how their mother might feel.

"Eye of w'ot?" Right asked, going over and opening the door to get a look himself. He quickly closed the door after he got a look of the chaos that was happening outside. He seemed genuinely surprised for a second, before looking over at the natives of this planet. "Suppose t'is is somet'in' t'at just, 'appens now and again?" He asked, getting a nod from Mu. "Ya could 'ave at least warned us before we came out."

"Ye think if I knew it was happenin' again I would have Crow and Rosetta here? Or invited anyone?" Conductor snapped a bit, before shaking his head and mumbling. "The one day Grooves doesn't show up so he can deal with this too... This is some pecking natural event that happens once a year, normally. It happened a good month before yer ship crashed onto the planet, so we shouldn't have to worry about this until Spring." He glanced to the side. "Weather Penguins can't do their jobs.."

"Look, I don't understand half of what yo' saying right now." Macbeth sighed as he sat against the wall, taking off his hat and letting Alexsandera rest along his shoulder. "But it looks like we're going to be stuck here while, so let's just deal with it." He said, before shaking his head at his tone. "Sorry, I haven't been sleepin' well lately." He apologized before he started another quick fight.

Hat Girl was quiet for a moment. She allowed Rosetta to hold her hand, it was clear she got scared from the momment Mu first opened the door and they heard those winds. "Why don't we play a game or something. Just to past the time?" She asked, glancing at the others. Platinum gave a clear nod and the rest either didn't respond or just sorta shrugged. She then got an idea and turned to Blake. "Do you have extra phones with your mod on them?" She asked, Blake lighting up at the mention.

"Is now really the time for Among Us?" Van asked, jestering back at the door. Platinum gave a shrug and went to the edge of the hall, already pulling out his own phone. "...Wait, Blake, why do you carry multiple phones on you? I know you're a tech person but is that really necessary?" Blake began to sign with one hand while they got their backpack off with the other. "Y-You know I can't understand signs that quick..."

"Wait, is that the game Snatcher told me about the last time we were in the woods together?" Mu asked Hat Girl, who gave a nod. She paused when Blake tossed one of the spare phones over to her. She eventually sigh and booted up the app. She thought the game sounded dumb when she heard about it, but it wasn't like there was much else to do... She paused when she clicked through the inventory screen out of curiosity, seeing an outfit that looked like hers. "What in the-" She glanced at the others, confused.

"Oh, Blake’s been wanting to draw some outfits based on the people they've seen on this planet and add them into the game. Your one of the frist they finished." Hat Girl turned to Blake who signed to her, before turning back to Mu. "They hope you're not too weirded out by it." She added. Mu just looked at the screen. She was..a little. But, there was some weird, nice feeling about being considered for something like this. "Pops, Conductor, Macbeth. You guys going to play?"

Right let out a small sigh. He Agreed with Van that this didn't feel like the time for games. At the same time, he already had his phone out to text Reginald to let him know they'd be back late. And as much as he wanted to brute force his way through the storm, he had to remember he had limits. "Fine. But just for a bit. If this goes on all night I want to keep Reg updated..." He paused as the lights flicked for a moment, some going out while a few managed to stay on. "I guess that's normal too."

"Normally." Conductor said. "Although I could've sworn there was some blots of lightin' dancing around one of the bulbs, but even I know that's ridiculous. Either way, toss me that metal box." Blake tilted their head. "Yes, I am aware what a phone is, but I can make up slang." Blake rolled their eyes and toss one over... and for a second it looked like something zap from the light above into the phone before it fell on the floor. "...Ye think I would catch it after that?"

"Ok, so funny story-" A voice came from the phone, some of the group shouting from the surprised. Hat Girl and Platinum both looked at each other to see if they were thinking the same thing, before Hat Girl grabbed the phone. Hydratic adjusted his mask slightly before he glanced at her. "I left the ship just to get some fresh air, the storm cloud moved to far from the ship and the sea.." He shook his head. "Point is uh, do you mind me chilling here with you guys. The eye is too much for even me, believe it or not."

Platinum took the phone from his sister and showed it to Right and Macbeth. "This is the Hydratic guy we told you about from the cruise." Platinum said. A cheerful voice but a wink when he had said that. Macbeth slowly reached for his sleeve, he had that feeling again. The same one he got near Autiomaa and Legends. Right gave Platinum a knowing nod before Platinum placed the phone down. "I think it'll be fine. We were going to play a game... just don't cheat. I don't know how well your powers would allow you to do so, but trust me. No one likes cheating."

"Kid, do I seem like a cheater?" Hydratic asked, gesturing to himself.

"...I want you all to know all this has just sounded like gibberish." Crow said, earning a few chuckles from those in the room. "What, I'm serious! ...And also, what are we even playing?"

Mu shook her head slightly before she glanced back at the screen. She didn't remember the last time she got to play any sort of game... Maybe this will be fun.

-------

Once the rules were explained, they started the game. Mu sighed a bit in relief when she saw 'Crewmate' on her screen, being the impostor sounded exhausting. She picked her location on the map and took a look at her task. She saw she was right next to the vault and headed in to do the dress mannequin task. She was curious as she looked around the map. Sure, it wasn't the exact same, but she did hear that this was based heavily on where they lived before the station. Made her pictured how Hattie's early years with the toppats were..

She left records to go look around for her next task. She hadn't seen anyone around yet, and was a little confused about that. Sure this was a big map but it didn't seem too big. Surely she would have bumped into someone by now? She wasn't sure what to think about that... She let out a shout as the Body Report screen came up suddenly. "His body was in electrical." Macbeth said as he glanced around. Mu opened up the chat to see Blake asking if anyone was nearby.

"Electrical? I saw Van in there a minute ago." Right said, eyeing suspension at Van. The teenager paused and looked at him, as if surprised. "Didn't even look like they were near a task. Just was standing there." Van glanced at Platinum, who was looking down at the ground, tapping his hands against the floor. Van finally open their mouth to speak, but got cut off by the voting sound effect. "If ya had a case, ya would've made it by now." Mu gave a nod to that, Van did seem suspicious. 

"I-I haven't played in awhile, I-I'm not used to getting accused! I just left before Platinum even came in!" Van got out their words at last. But it seemed too late. Mu had already cast her vote in, and seemingly everyone alive was in a silent agreement. Van finally clicked to vote, one person voting to skip while everyone else voted the white crewmate out. "I didn't even do anything." They said as the screen confirmed they were not an imposter. "Just, be careful guys. Ok?"

Mu let out an annoyed sigh. Maybe she should have waited for a proper response. Sure they were still good on numbers for now, but who knows what would happen as the game went on... The conductor got killed not long later, Macbeth once again finding and reporting the body. Blake put in chat that they had last seen Crow with him, and Rosetta agreed. However, no one was as willing to jump into a mass vote over that after what happened to Van. The majority voted to skip, but there was a silent agreement to keep an eye out for that Cyan crewmate.

Mu let out a sigh as she finished putting the guns away, heading up and passing Hat Girl as she went into the engine room while the Rose crewmate went into cockpit. She walked through the main hall and began to pick up the towels on the floor. Mu really hope this was just for mechanics, and the toppats didn't actually just leave towels on the floor like this. She went into the proper shower section to grab the last one... and just barely caught the shape of the pod, before Hat Girl seemed to come from it. But she had just seen Hat Girl walk into cockpit.

"Shoot." She whispered before she quickly raced her character away before the impostor could react. She passed Hydartic's blue crewmate (himself??) and got onto the flying pad, panicking inside her mind until she could get up to the meeting room and press the emergency meeting. "Shapeshifter was on!" She blurted out, letting out a small sigh that no one had died that turn. "I saw Hattie in cockpit and then walked in on someone shapeshift into her. Didn't catch the color of the pod."

"Shapeshifter makes this a lot more risky. Thanks for the clear Mu." Hat Girl said, turning to her and smiling a bit. Mu smiled back, before looking eyes with Crow. She couldn't see his eyes, but she could feel him looking around the room nervously. She didn't know the Conductor's grandkids well, but she knew that wasn't like Crow in most situations. She cleared her throat. "We're already suspicious of Crow, I say let's get him out of here. Unless anyone was with him this past round."

"No one was.." Crow admitted, and the votes came in quickly. He threw his hand in the air when he was voted out. "I wasn't even in showers!" He said as the screen confirm his role. "...And Sorry about the kill, Grandpa.."

Mu had thought now that they had gotten one imposter out of the game, getting the other was only a matter of time... Yet the game kept going for a while. Lights got turned off for a good chunk of time, since it could be a hassle if more than one person tried to fix it. That allowed the living impostor to get multiple kills in each round, slowly lowering the comfortable distance between them and victory. And everytime Mu thought she had an idea who it was, they would be dead by the next meeting...

She was thinking about her latest suspicions when a new alarm sound started playing. She quickly checked the map and saw two points on it. She went to the closest point, but found Macbeth was already there. She cursed herself since the pad was on the left side of the screen, meaning she'd have to go the long way. Or have someone beat her there. She began to hurry as quickly as possible, and did make it to the end in time to input the code. Allowing a breath.. before Hat Girl's body was reported.

"Engine room." Right said, letting out a sigh. "Would 'ave been at t'e sabotage but I was lock be'ind so many doors."

"Wait, you were the one who got Van voted out in the beginning." Mu spoke as the thought came to her. "How do we know you weren't lying back then?" She asked, crossing her arms. Right just seemed to send her a glare while Macbeth glanced at them both. Everyone else in the room was either silently watching or, based on their typing, discussing what was happening in the ghost chat. "Macbeth, I saw you more than enough times. You would have killed me by now. I think Right self reported."

"'nd 'ow do we know ya didn't start the sabotage? Macbeth, it 'as to be 'er. Ya gotta vote 'er out." Right said  before casting his vote as soon as it started. Mu quickly cast her in relation, and waited. The votes came in, two votes for her. She held in a frustrated sigh as she watched herself get voted out... Only to have her eyes widen at the brown crewmate on the red screen. "Wait-" Right seemed just as surprised, before turning to Macbeth, who had a small smirk on

his face.

"Didn't expect me?" He asked. "I played it with the kids a hundred dozen times at least. I know the useful traps to avoid."

"Yea, as soon as I heard Pops and Mu access each other, I knew it was over." Platinum sighed as he led his head back against the wall. Hat Girl gave a small chuckle as he rolled his eyes. Mu shook her head, why did she fall into such a  trap? Now that she thought about it, she did catch a glimpse of the pod's color. It wasn't enough time for her brain to figure out what color it was, but it was far from purple. "Well, should we hop into the next round? I'd like to see if I can get payback on Crow."

"I was just playing my part of the game, if my teammate didn't report the bodies so often." Crow mumbled before glancing over at Macbeth, who gave a small shrug. Mu glanced at the ghost. She had this weird feeling about him. She didn't know exactly what, but there was just something that felt more.. divine about his presence. Not sure why it took him winning a game for her to notice. "But yea. Let's just get started, I don't think the storm is going away anytime soon. And not like we have someone who can control storms."

"Trust me, if I could call Anumand to clear this, I would." Hydartic's voice called from the phone. "They'd do a great job.."

After a few more minutes of talking just to settle down the nerves, the next round began. Mu thought she heard an annoyed sigh from somewhere in the room but didn't look up from her screen as she began to work on her next few tasks. She started to get the feeling of the layout in the back of her head, and that made it easier for her to relax. She only would tense up once she found herself in a room with some other players. Who knows when one of them could try to kill her after all. 

She got most of the task on the left side of the ship taken care of that she felt comfortable moving to the right side of the ship. It was a little longer than last time, no one must have died yet. Or if they had, no one had found their body. She learnt that the map had a few good spots for bodies to be hidden, even by accident. Blake must have designed it that way on purpose... She heard a sudden thud and while she had to remind herself not to look around, she figured she knew what that meant.

Sure enough, a small gasp came from Conductor and Blake's dead body appeared on screen. They were the only one who had died, and they looked annoyed about it. They crossed their arms and Mu shrugged when they made eye contact.

"I'm honestly surprised this is the first time any of us were murdered in the kitchen. Seems like the perfect killin' place if ye ask me." Conductor spoke as he leaned back. The rest of the group given him some glares and he seemed to pause a moment before he spoke again. "Oh, I didn't see anyone around. Believe me, I would have already accused someone if I did." The rest of the group sighed. "Let's just skip. It's just one death, we can take a few more before we need to vote."

"Why are you like this Grandpa?" Crow sighed as everyone skipped, not much more they could do. Mu picked records as her spawn location and went to take care of her task in the Lobby. Would have been nice to gotten more info but it didn't seem like anyone was going to trust any information the old bird gave anyway. She just needed some time to breathe... and she wanted to drop the phone when Platinum's dead body appeared on screen. It only been like, a minute or two? How was he already dead?

"I-I thought I saw someone but I didn't get a good look at them." Rosetta spoke as she placed her phone to the ground. "I haven't memorized everyone's color either.."

"Unless anyone's got any suspicions,  think it's best to save our voices and agree to skip." Mu sighed, and no one spoke up with anything. The only ones who were speaking were Blake and Platinum in the ghost chat. As the next round started, Mu would occasionally glance over at them. Wondering what was going through their minds as this all played out. She hadn't become a ghost yet... "Ok, this is getting ridiculous." Mu announced a minute later, once Crow had been found dead. "Let me guess, no one?"

"Actually, I think there's a chance the lass might be the impostor." The Conductor said as he pointed over at her, and she looked surprised. "I remembered seeing Crow with her last, and it wasn't that long ago." Hat Girl had typed out a message while he spoke, explaining she was with him but left a bit before the kill. "I thought we agreed Blake was going to be the only one using the text chat?" Hat Girl gave a shrug, Mu couldn't blame her. They took so long to talk sometimes. "We don't have to vote her now, I'm just pointing it out."

"I mean, you're just gonna make it harder for our team if you do." Hat Girl said. Only three people voted for her, so the game continued. Mu wasn't one of the people who voted her, but she had a small bit of suspicions. There was just something about the way Hattie said that final comment. It sounded like her normal tone on the surface but... There was a facepalm from across the room before the Conductor's body appeared on the screen. "Oh peck me." She said, Platinum breaking his silence to laugh.

"I-I saw her this time." Rosetta said, and Hat Girl just nodded. Mu couldn't help but hold in a small snort. Even Crow didn't make a mistake like that when they were playing. "Sorry.." Rosetta said to Hat Girl after a moment, but Blake shook their head from across the room. Platinum, the closest to the kid, quickly showed his screen that showed Blake saying it was just part of the game. "Still, she's so nice normally. I feel bad.." She said as the alien got voted out of the group.

"None of that matters in this game." Hydratic spoke. "It's all or nothing... But hopefully the game will be easier."

The game didn't get too much easier. It wasn't as bad as the massacre that was the last round, but there was still the occasional kill here and there from the Imposter. Mu had her suspicions for a while. She tried to be smarter about her guesses. She thought it could have been Macbeth, they seemed to have been bumping into each other a lot. But he was one of the impostor's last round, what were the odds the game would pick him again? He seemed to be in the right places for tasks as well.

She was suspicious of Hydratic for a while as well. He would run all over the map, and Mu was sure it was before he was trying to get a quick kill. During one of the past meetings, he said that he already got all his tasks done and was just running around to see if he could catch the impostor or find a body. Mu found it a bit strange that if he was doing that, why no bodies had shown up yet. But that wasn't enough evidence to make a proper accusation. And she didn't want the game to end with her making a mistake like that again.

The game started to feel like it was taking forever. The only reason she hadn't gotten her task done was the impostor kept setting up the crash sabotage what felt like every five seconds. She could swear Hattie giggled each and every time.

She let out an annoyed sigh as she finished the sabotage and then climbed up the ladder to dump out the trash. And she was done. She took a glance up at the progress bar, seeing it was close to completion. She tapped her hand on the screen as she waited for the inevitable next body to be reported... She thought she could hear a bit of muttering from nearby, but didn't look up... until a beep filled the room. "Alex!" Macbeth called, before the Crewmate victory screen played on everyone else's.

The room burst into a bit of laughter as the Dweller gently knocked the phone out of Macbeth's hands before resting in them. "Did they really just left the game for ye?" Conductor asked, Macbeth rolling his eyes but nodding as he patted the dweller on their head. Mu couldn't get the smile off her face. She felt robbed of a fairly earned victory, but there was just something about winning this way that felt a lot more funny. "Wait, I think the eye is claiming outside... at least a bit."

"T'ink yer right." Right spoke as he went up to the door and listened. "Still doesn’t seem safe to leave though."

"Could just be in the eye of the storm." Hattie said as Blake signed. Mu just sighed, she started to feel a bit tired. She should have been back in mafia town by now, or at least a decent bit away there. Hopefully she could get going again soon. But she was having a bit of fun here... why did her having fun have to feel so right? She should be focused on her sole duty. Yet... "Mu?" Hat Girl gently shook her shoulder, causing Mu to come back from the pit of her mind. "Are you alright?"

"Yea, just got a little worried for some people, that's all." It wasn't a very good excuse, she would have had names if it was a convincing sounding one. It was clear some people knew the truth about her statement, but didn't speak up about it. No point in risking starting a genuine fight after a bunch of light-hearted and playful ones. She glanced back at the screen of the phone she had. "Do you guys want to do something else... Or do more of this. I kinda wanna see if I can get lucky with the role I'm given." She gave a small smirk.

-------

They all slowly lost track of time as they played. Mu knew for sure she did. The longer she played, the more she enjoyed the game. Sure, she still thought it was a bit dumb, but dumb things can be fun sometimes. She did eventually get to be impostor, although she didn't get too many kills in before she was figured out. The role seemed a lot more stressful than she originally thought. Still, she enjoyed her time. It almost made her feel sad it would be over once the storm had cleared.

They started another round, finding herself as a crewmate once again. She spawned in the main hall, since that gave her the most access to the possible task she could do. She saw she had a few and started working on them. The game went on and Mu was expecting a body found screen at any moment. It almost made her feel uneasy that there wasn't one yet. Like she'd be the body that would end up being found. She wasn't the best at being patients during meetings, only able to keep her mouth shut by ranting her feelings in ghost chat. A lot of the others were similar.

The screen began to flash red and she sighed as she went to fix the sabotage. She didn't understand why everyone liked using this one so much, the lights seemed so much more effective... She got to the left first and quickly placed in the code and waited for the sight side to do the same... She heard a facepalm from somewhere in the room and by now that usually only meant one thing. Right Hand Man's dead body appeared on the screen. She looked up to see the man shaking his head.

"It's Crow!" Hydratic's voice came from the single phone laying on the floor. "He killed Right... hang on" there was a chuckle from the phone before he could finish, a bit of laughter in his voice. "He killed Right right in front of me." Crow just held up his hands in defeat. Mu shook her head a bit, holding in a chuckle as she sent in her vote. He could have at least tried pleading shapeshifter. "You think he would've picked up that being a bad idea." Hydartic said, before the votes came in.

"You know what, I think I prefer watching all this to playing it anyway." Crow said, leaning back as he adjusted his phone. Mu knew better than to expect good things from getting one impostor out by now. She glanced at her list of tasks and saw she only had the meeting room task to finish, and she was done. So she raced over to the room from her spawn location as fast as she could, and pulled down the lever. She let out a small sigh of relief as she knew she did her part.

She then shook her head and decided to focus. She might be able to figure out who the impostor was if she was careful. She began to slowly head around the map, watching everyone. If a room had two people in it, she would leave and wait, coming in to check if one of them had been killed. She was making a big loop around the orbital station, until she got to the security room. Right next to the cameras was Platinum's body. She couldn't help but feel bad, he had been through it a lot these games.

"Why did you do that?!" Hydearic called suddenly as she reported the body. "The impostor was shapeshifted as me and I was chasing them trying to make their timer run out!"

"Well I'm sorry, I wasn't aware." Mu said, rolling her eyes a bit. "Besides, I think I got an idea about who it is. Was anyone with Van at the last minute? Because I saw them with Platinum a lot this past round." Van seemed to freeze up as they tried to think of what to say. Mu chuckled a bit as she opened the in-game chat and saw Blake had put on a smirk. Soon the voting began. "You could’ve at least tried to defend yourself" Mu said once they were all casted.. only to sigh. "Are you kidding me?"

"I-I'm not good with these kinds of things, what did you expect?" Van asked, before sighing as they placed their phone down, likely done with their task as well. She rolled her eyes as she focused back on the game. Maybe it was the group's fault for being so quick to vote at first mention of who might be suspicious. But if half the people didn't freeze up or thought quicker they wouldn't be in those situations. "I'm stretching my legs. They've been on the urge of falling asleep, and I don't wanna deal with that when we leave." They said as they stood up, careful walking past Platinum.

Mu let out a sigh as she went back to her new routine of checking all the rooms, and seeing if she could catch any murders that took place. She was feeling tired, and not just because of her current gameplay cycle. It had been at least an hour, likely more, since they started playing. She wasn't keeping track of the time for once. She just wanted to go and lay her head down. She was thinking of after this round ends suggesting they just turn in for the night if the storm was still blowing outside.

She woke up a bit when Hat Girl's body appeared on screen. "I swear some people are faster than others, might have to look into that." Blake sent in the chat as Mu opened it. "Weapons. The upperpart near Burt's room. Just saw their Shadow." They typed out and Mu glanced over at them. She then glanced around, no one seemed to be acting guilty. "Mu, why have you been going in and out of rooms? You called Hydartic out on similar behavior earlier?"

"I'm a hypocrite and bored, what else do you expect from me?" She asked as she sighed. She knew Blake didn't have any useful info based on how they commented, so it was likely going to be a skip round, so why bother trying. They still had eight players left, so they were almost better off letting the impostor do the kills and try and catch them in the act. "Voting someone off will make it easier for whoever is impostor... we're at least able to travel in pairs now, that might help."

"Sure it would, lassie." The Conductor mumbled, sounding a bit annoyed as he skipped. Mu raised a brow at that, but didn't question it much. She saw Right nearby when she loaded in and started to follow him. For the next three or so minutes, everything was calm. Then suddenly, the Conductor mumbled "Oh peck this." Before the disconnect sound was played... and the crewmates won. There was a bit of quiet laughter from the teens as the bird crossed his arms. "It was impossible for me to get a kill!"

"You could have tried a little harder, Grandpa." Crow said, crossing his arms before pausing. "Hey, do you hear anything?I think the Storm's over."

"Wait, what- Hattie, take me to the door." Hydartic called out, a hint of what seemed to be panic in his voice. She nodded and picked up the phone, walking over and opening the door. It was still raining, and there were still winds with sand dancing about, but it was much calmer than before. Suddenly, a spark came from the phone, Hydratic appearing in the rain. A bit faded, but it was still him. "I'm sorry, but I need to go now. As much as I loved hanging with you, I rather get home myself and not make you do the work for me."

"Oh, it's no issue! Just be safe!" Hat Girl waved, before the strange figured disappeared, what seemed to be electricity bouncing between drops of rain into the sky. She let out a sigh as she turned off the phone he was in, her eyes widened slightly when she saw the time. Mu looked at the phone she used, and let out a small grone. Almost midnight?

Mu sighed as she got up. "I need to go." She said before she headed out.

Just like that. No dramatic leave. Just covering her eyes to shield them from the faint winds of sand and dust.

Life was like that sometimes.

[hungergamesheadcanons]

Shrektacular

Listen we're pretending Shrek exists in The Hunger Games universe ok? A slightly different rendition of the ointment after the mist.

"Finnick!" Katniss yelped, "Your face!"

The District 4 Victor-turned-tribute looked up at her in confusion, before recoiling himself. "What about your face?!"

They simultaneously looked down at their hands, watching the tips of their fingers turn green even as the blisters practically fell away, before looking up at each other.

"You look shrektacular," Finnick ended up quipping, a small smile pulling at the edge of his mouth.

"Shrektacular?" Katniss asked in confusion.

"You've never seen it? Add it to your list if you get out of here, that movie is awesome."

She just rolled her eyes, squeezing more of the ointment onto her hands and gesturing for him to turn around. "Come on, let's get the rest of them. Not used to being green, huh?"

"Katniss, Katniss, feeling me up already? With your husband asleep?" He tutted playfully, but did as he was told.

"Careful or I'll draw a dick on your back."

"You wouldn't."

"Watch me."

The two of them were giggling by now, one of Finnick's hands coming up to grab hers as she started tracing the image on his back. It didn't matter that the ointment wasn't on that particular finger, the mental image caused the two of them to just collapse into hysterics.

Briefly, Katniss wondered if this level of joy and silliness had ever been seen in The Hunger Games before. It felt alien, in this arena where everything was out to kill them, to be laughing over something as simple as drawing dicks.

"Fine," she relented, "I won't draw a dick."

The silence was pregnant between them, before she smirked, "I can give you a rocking set of tits though if you want."

Finnick snorted, actually snorted, sending the two of them off into loud fits of laughter. Once he started, he couldn't seem to stop, until both of them were wheezing. Their skin had been steadily turning greener, and once Katniss was covered, it was time to wake Peeta.

"Wait, wait, let's do something to wake him up!"

"Like what?" She asked, already excited.

"I dunno, something stupid."

"Hmm... Let's just stick our faces right in front of him?"

"Oh he's gonna freak. Let's do it."

They positioned themselves in front of him, far enough that they wouldn't get punched, but close enough to be recognisable. After a little poking and prodding, they managed to get him awake enough for -

"ACK!"

The two green kids fell to pieces, raucous laughter causing several birds to flutter away. Katniss didn't even care that they could be alerting enemies to their position, or that surely her family and the Capitol were watching this moment of levity surrounded by death and despair. Peeta watched the two of them, tongue tucked into his cheek even as he tried to suppress a grin.

"Geez, thanks guys." He muttered, "great wakeup call there, not terrifying at all in the arena."

"Hey!" Finnick gasped out between snorts, "At least she didn't draw a dick on you!"

"I didn't draw a dick on you Finnick!" Katniss cackled, "I promise!"

"Lies and slander!"

Peeta shook his head, standing up. "So is that ointment available? I assume there is a reason why you're green."

Katniss went to hand him the tube, before she paused, a wicked grin on her face. "Peeeeetaaaaa~" She sing-songed, and her husband took one look at her before running towards the beach.

Katniss set off after him, Finnick only a second behind as he grabbed their stuff. There was a rustling behind him, but he didn't care to check what it was, too busy cackling as Katniss tackled Peeta to the floor.

"Katniss, wait!" The blonde was giggling, before spitting out a load of sand. "Blech! Oh that is nasty!"

"Hey Finnick!" She yelled, "Any suggestions?"

Finnick laughed as she manhandled the top of Peeta's wetsuit off, exposing some of the boils that had slipped through the garment along with pale skin.

"Oh I am so drawing Shrek on his back!"

"You draw Shrek, I'll draw the dicks."

"NO!"

In the madness, they failed to notice a silver parachute tinkling down. When they were done, and would finally open it, they would be greeted with warm bread from District 4, alongside 3 different portions of a hearty soup, and a note that said 'glad you're having fun - H'.

[midchelle]

What songs do you think were written by John with Paul in mind at least? I know there’s so many of Paul’s which are arguably about John but because John’s life was cut short we only have his songs from the 70’s which seem pretty straightforward in being about Yoko and Jealous Guy seems to be one of those despite Paul thinking otherwise.

There are a few Dakota demos floating around that seem to be about Paul, or at least The Beatles, but I think in general John kept that stuff off his albums. I don't think it was a headspace he enjoyed being in. Paul probably didn't, either, but when he writes a song he enters a fugue state, comes out of it, and examines what he's made like an archaeologist studying the ruins of a prehistoric society: It's possible that this was made in response to An Emotion, but we're not sure. More information is required.

The Beatles A lot of the songs people think are about Paul assume that he's in love with him, and while I might agree with that to some extent, it's not a very good way of doing history. So here's the ones I think are probably about him without assuming that.

Day Tripper (1965) Expanding brain meme where the top tier is 'write a song about how he sucks and make him sing lead on it.' Makes you wish for a world where they stayed together during the seventies and John sang harmony on Too Many People.

Nowhere Man (1965) It's a very Paul kind of songwriting move to write a song about yourself and frame it as 'so there's this other guy I've heard of who's a total fuckup, not me though.' So is it about John? Is it about Paul? Actually, it's about both of them.

These are two different people. And one of them, believe it or not, can't see me at all.

And Your Bird Can Sing (1966) Process of elimination, it's probably about Paul. I know Marianne says it's about Mick, but I don't know if John cared about Mick like that. His bird couldn't even sing at that point. He was still going out with Jean Shrimpton's little sister. There's another theory that it's about Frank Sinatra, which I thought sounded kind of plausible, but it's probably about Paul.

Come Together (1969) You think you're just moseying along this beautiful, lazy river of agreeable nonsense, and then he hits you with 'got to be good looking 'cause he's so hard to see.' Wonder what that's about.

Post-Beatles

I Found Out (1970) It's a song about becoming disillusioned with things you once believed in. Paul is literally mentioned by name.

How Do you Sleep? (1971) Yeah we all know.

Jealous Guy (1971) Maybe it is a little bit about Paul, I don't know. There must be some reason why he thought that song was about him. It could just be cope. There's only one way for us to know for sure: FBI, release the seventies John Lennon wiretaps!

I Know (I Know) (1973) I've already mentioned the riff at the beginning, but let's talk about:

#9 Dream (1974) It's been ten years since The Beatles broke America, and he was referencing back to A Hard Day's Night with the promo for the album. He's clearly feeling a little nostalgic for early Beatlemania, before he was so cruelly forced to learn what money is and how shares work. If not directly about Paul, it is about their shared past. It's about playing music with someone you loved, so long ago. It literally came to him in a dream, the most Paul McCartney songwriting behaviour that there is. Look at this:

(Just Like) Starting Over (1980) Me when I write a song about rekindling a dormant relationship with someone I love while drawing on the artists that influenced me and my songwriting partner when we were young and also name-dropping both his hugely successful second band and one of his songs: it's not about Paul.

[littlemonstert-blog]

I like Batgirl (Barabra Gordon) more as Oracle.

Even though I made the post about her batgirl movie. I still love her more as Oracle because of how she overall developed

As her start as Batgirl: She's not driven by a tragic backstory and she wasn't raised by a coven of Ninjas who passed on their Ninja fighting skills to her. She wants to do good so she just does. I think she's the only member of the Batfamily who isn't driven by a dark past. ( In some iterations)

More than I realized alot of people have a problem with Barabra aka batgirl about her being a victim of assualt & how female charcters, love intrests & family alike( to be fair my oppion the 1930s & way back then were doing a lot of weird shit on both sides of the spectrum, hell really depends on what writer you got back then.) being hurt, assualted or killed.

Add to the fact that Batman got his back blown out by Bane but somehow he recovered.

  Also there are people who have magic ablitlies that can heal people. Also have the Lazura's Pit though it not the best choice I'd say. So yeah they pick & choose what characters get to have back.

Some writers did want her to be able to use her legs again but during the Oracle run this was said

The real reason is Denny O'Neil. Alex Ross and Paul Dini had this idea. Here's what he (Ross) has said:

"Paul Dini had this idea of putting Barbara Gordon in the Lazarus Pit to revive her. . . . I thought it was a great idea, and we pitched then-Batman editor Denny O'Neil with these drawings of that costume design. The idea of using the red instead of the traditional yellow was meant to invoke the idea that coming from the Lazarus Pit, she was in a way, more compromised as a character...And...that went nowhere. Denny shot it down, because, according to him, everybody loves Barbara Gordon as Oracle and as a handicapped character. The theory was that DC didn't have enough handicapped characters, so they weren't going to do anything with Barbara as she was. And the design went into the drawer."

Then there's the other side as to people having a problem with comics taking away disabillity characters.

(This mostly New Earth contunity, I'll label if its some other Earth)

Why was Babs chosen?. Well, Joker wanted to hurt Jim Gordon drive him insane and prove his point by extension. Joker didn't even know she was Batgirl. To him she's the Commisoner's daughter

"One bad day can make anyone crazy."

Killing Joke:

( Do not watch the animated movie bc that...let's just say it a contiuation of batman the animated series.) After this this is were Oracle is born.

Side note: I feel bad because man earlier before killing Joke, Robin/ Jason (one time even Robin Tim Drake the animated series) Joker really have it out for those two.

Gotta give credit to writers John Ostrander & Kim Yale, who were upset at Barbara Gordon’s treatment in The Killing Joke, successfully revamped her into the computer hacker & information broker Oracle in the pages of Suicide Squad

Oracle soon became a key member of Batman’s supporting cast.  In the Birds of Prey series first Chuck Dixon and then Gail Simone herself did great work with Barbara / Oracle.

 I would’ve probably hated this scene far more if Babs never got the chance to be what I love about her. A survivor, someone who manages to overcome even that: (Birds of Prey issue 124)

Trust me she got her lick back

I am happy that after a Brainiac arc she's able to at least move her toes

Throughout 1986-2011 this version of her has developed so much into a great character.

She spent most of the early 2000s somewhat running the JLA, JSA and Teen Titans all at once. She built her own superteam. Outsmarted Lex Luthor time and again. Faced down and defeated Brainiac repeatedly. Helping/Lifted up countless battered, traumatized superheroines. Successfully rehabilitated Ivy and Harley Quinn when Batman couldn't. She was one of the most influential mover and shaker in the DC multiverse for years.

Then New52 & Rebirth

things seem to fall from grace for me

Now I'm glad she's walking again due to a device on in her neck that helps her walk.

But,her New 52 and Rebirth series are a real set back for her. Oracle at her best was far more capable then this version. As soon as she put the cowl back on, Alot of the stories she was involved in were not all that great.

I don't like it. Oracle was a major force to be reckoned with when I first started seriously reading comics.

Infinite Frontier

The stories have gotten a bit better, still batgirl sometimes but more of Oracle too.

Comics:

Batgirls

Urban Legends

Little issues with Nightwing

Batman family webtoons ( which suprisingly is good little light hearted comic)

I just hope they are able to build her character up with this version I want to see if they can push her to the limit & rise up.