#but every time they bring this subject i know theyre gonna send me to the psychiatrist again AND NOPE

[midnighteloquence]

lets rant about a person im starting to not like and lost of reasons why i dont

right uhh i need labels to get started

friend a: (hey pookie) FAV PERSONNNN!! ^^ i love them so much theyre so so cool and amazing and ahh best friend love ya

friend b: my first friend in this school!! i love her so much shes so so swag even if i dont tell her often how much she means to me shes sooo amazing

friend c: subject of this rant, we used to be rlly close but recently i stopped liking them as much

idk if theres anyone else im mentioning so thats gonna be it

okay so to start off (what i started off with anyways when i first ranted about this in the shower) is the fact that recently theyve been sending me tiktoks about really sexual things saying that its me and them. i know it is technically my fault for not being super clear on my boundaries and not saying whether somethings bothering me or not, but i just get so uncomfortable when you keep talking about about how you cum to me. i know that i make alot of sexual jokes with friend b, and for a while i didnt get why i was so uncomfortable with C making jokes about me, until i realised that its because with B i like them but with C i dont like them as much making me more uncomfortable towards them.

another reason is the fact that they lie, like all the time. even when it isn’t necessary. theyve said themselves that theyre a pathological liar, and that they have bpd, adhd, and depression and anxiety. which is why i never talk about any of my problems involving them. but literally i dont fucking get how they think im gonna believe them then 1st, none of them add up and 2nd, you lie to me when you know i know the truth?? like at some point i heard you talking shit about A, and when i bring it up you lie to me?? its just ugh. youve lied to my face so much i always ALWAYS think youre lying. you could be blatantly telling the truth but ill still think youre lying.

another mini thing is that you expect me to know so much about your past and your mental illness but you dont clarify anything about them?? like youve said “i cant do that and you know it.” but i seriously dont?? you havent told me anything about your bpd or how it effects you but you assume i know everything about it?? i cant just guess things im sorry

a really main thing is the fact that they keep insulting me (and many many MANYYYY others) on tons of things, more specifically about our insecurities. at some point, they kept on insulting my friend’s boyfriend’s face to the point they had to FUCKING COVER IT. AND THEY STILL CONTINUED?? and when mentioned that theyre a dick they say “oh i just dont know how to act nice”. LITERALLY. IF YOU HAVE NOTHING NICE TO SAY THEN STAY SILENT. actually you dont know how many new insecurities i have formed because of you. and ik i can speak for everyone you keep insulting “as a joke”.

another thing!! they are super contradictory and hypocritical. at some point they said something along the lines of “i know that you cant show affection very easily but still i think a little bit would be nice”. you admit yourself that you know i cant show affection that easy but then you still ask for it?? im fine with affection every now and again but you want me to always show affection. i cant be that fulfilling person for you and you know that but you still ask for it. plus; you have a partner yourself (oh also they keep telling different stories that dont add up like “i got to cuddle with my boyfriend” then say “hes gonna come over so i can see him irl for the first time!!”).

another note on the “fulfilling” part, i find myself almost always having to either convince you that i actually care for you or having to convince yourself not to kill yourself. its fucking exhausting. i have to repeat myself over and over and over and over and over again that i like you but you still say “yeah but bfr you dont”. i shouldnt have to do this constantly im tired of it. you are mentally ill, these are things you talk about to a fucking THERAPIST, not a 13 year old girl whos struggling herself.

TALKING ABOUT THE HYPOCRISY. right so they continuously say about how im not putting much effort into our friendship. but them themselves arent putting any effort into me. you talk about how if im distant you think i hate you, but when have you ever expressed actual interest in the things im saying? friendship goes both ways, not only do I have to make effort in getting closer to you, YOU have to make effort in getting closer to me.

literally you talk about how im never really interested in your interests, but i actually engage, i ask questions, i remember things. but you? all you do is answer with an uninterested “cool”. i know that youre struggling tho which is once again why i dont bring it up. literally you say im your favourite person, but when someone even dares tells you to talk to me you say “what is there to talk about? [my interest]?”

about your mental health, it is the primary reason why i dont bring anything up. because i know that youre suffering and i know that you’d say that thats the reason youre like that. but its so frustrating to have to continue to be your friend just because i know that if i leaved you’d do something drastic. im so exhausted and mentally drained because of this friendship.

you know yourself that i am struggling, you were at some point worried i was gonna kill myself. but you still continue to have to have me convince you that i dont want you to kys. “you’ll live” say that again to me istg.

alot of things ive already talked about on this account and my incognito account @imnooneyouknow so if you wanna know more check that out in the link below!! like and subscribe for more epic content!!

(bye)

[gigglincactus]

Parents: Let us talk about your mental health

Me:

[violetnotez]

Yo shindo relationship headcannons but he uses his quirk to make reader think that their phone is going off. He finds it hilarious. Reader does not.

HC: Shindo Yo as a S/O

Omg nobody held me back so I did Shindo Yo Boyfriend HC sorry not sorry 😏

Pairing: Shindo Yo x reader

just fluffy ideas of how this boy would be as an s/o

I honestly think he’s a total flirt-LIKE LOOK HOW PRETTY HE IS

but he’s like different about it

hes not straight flirty, like “oh you look hot, did it hurt when you fell from heaven?” ew

No, hes more sentimental and observant

He’ll greet every morning with the biggest smile and always giving you a compliment

“Wow babe you look amazing! Did you change your hair? It looks great!”

“Love the new lipgloss you got- it really suits you!”

“Whoa youre wearing a green shirt...did you do that just for me?”

This boy prides himself on PDA

once you start dating he is EXTREMELY touching immeditaely

Holding your hand, ksses on your cheeks, hugging you from behind

He THRIVES on touches

If hes dating someone, theyre his one and only- so why not let everyone else know that?

If your not for that, thats cool, he’ll hold back a little-after pouting about it, seriously, he loves being close to his s/o

The first time he sees you in one of shirts, this boy is GOING TO MELTTTTTT

He has no shirts anymore- and its not even because YOU took it

He was just so obsessive with seeing you in his clothes, he just gifts it to you

He try to be slick about it, like leaving them in your room and “pretending” he left them

Would be super sad tho if you try to bring them back

He is a classic romantic

Like on your first date, he brought you a whole ass bouquet of roses

Your dates are usually pretty generic- the movies, a nice restaurant, maybe a cute ice cream shop and a walk on the beach....

He doesn't really try to overthink or go crazy with dates

He is the CUTEST in a gray hoodie

This boy is pretty-and he KNOWS it

He’ll do every f* boy thing that’ll make your heart swoon-like run his hand through his hair, give you side eye looks, his tongue poking out of his mouth-

YOU KNOW WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT EVERY F-BOY DOES THESE THINGS

He defintiely will use this to his advantage

He would never cheat on you, but, he will pretend to indulge in other girl’s hitting on him, trying to act “innocent” like he didnt know

HE DAMN WELL KNOWS

(Honestly watch out though girls are gonna be trying to get with him left and right)

Like if youre arguing with him a little and he sees a girl checking him out, he’ll try and make you jealous (he has a wierd thing for seeing you angsry he thinks its kinda hot)

And he neverrrr takes arguments seriously. Like at all.

Once he gets more comfortable in the relationship, he will  be a totalllll prankster

He has a pretty good quirk for it

Like he’ll make you think there are earthquakes just to see you all frazzled

and he will totally play along to see how long he can make you think there really was an earthquake

Or if your taking too long to get ready he’ll make the floor rumble so you stumble

Usually ends with you yelling at him for almost ruining your eyeliner and him laughing

(we finally get to the original request Jesus Christ)

HEAR ME OUT

He would definitely try to make you think your phone is going off just to have an excuse to touch your rear

Cause if you put your phone in your back pocket, all hes gotta do is lightly touch it and send a small vibration...

It honestly was sad how long it took you to figure out it was him

He was trying to hold back chuckles the whole time, your face so confused when you kept bringing your phone to your face and seeing no alerts

Until he got carried away and touched your ass-

when you were holding your phone in your hand

You tensed up, stopping in your tracks as you gave him a wierd look

“Wait Yo-”

And then realization struck you-it was him

You cheeks got red, a gasp slipping your mouth, as you tried to swat his chest

“Ahh cmon babe dont be bitter!” 

honestly he found it just super funny, chuckling as he instantly grabed your hand before it collided with his chest

 he kisses your digits, his thumb rubbing soothing circles on the side

“Ya know, you look cute when you blush-”

“Dont change the subject Yo, you just touched my ASS IN PUBLIC-”

(Sorry if these were short, I’m working on the Disney Choose Your Adventure rn so my usual fic posts will be a little shorter!)

[mistymark]

nct dream as classmates

renjun

carries like 346342 things in his pencil case

is constantly drawing in his notebook and textbooks

leans over to doodle in the margins of your pages

his notes are really messy tho

rolls his eyes at ur much neater, more aesthetically pleasing notes

but is always willing to give u coloured pens and pencils to keep to a colour theme

is probably shocked to find out he's top of the class and thinks its a joke

but boy is just smart af

but all his word documents are titled like ‘redox fucking reactions’ ‘what the fuck is a chloroplast’ ‘??????????’

sends u all his notes tho

texts u at midnight all the time for no fuckin reason

it always starts with ‘yo are u still awake’

and ur like ‘yeah whats up’

and then he’ll respond with the most RANDOM shit

like what goes through that boys head

‘do u think I should use yellow or orange for the next part of my project’

‘idk send me a photo’

‘no just pick’

‘uh yellow’

‘im gonna go with blue’

either rocks up to classes looking like a god or an absolute mess theres no in between

marches through the halls with his hair a mess and doesnt give a shit

lowkey terrifies the younger students lmao

but will help them out if they ask for it

jeno

good student

studies enough but doesnt stress that much

he's just here for a good time

throws snacks at u when u frown at ur work until u look up at him and smile

lowkey worried about ur mental health

that shy kid that everyone expects to be average at all his subjects but u catch a glance of his tests and theyre all A+

owns a planner

uses it

what

I know

keeps track of a lot of school events bc he has a lot of extra curriculars

tries to get u to join more

(no)

probably knows ur schedule better than u do

‘hey jeno what do u have next’

‘calculus’

‘...’

‘that means you have chemistry’

ur always yelling at him through the halls like ‘OI JENO WHERE U GOING’ to try and find out what subject u have next

walks u to classes even if theyre in the completely wrong direction to his own

you really only have study hall together

but u had a lot of classes in common last year and ur habits of studying together just carried through I guess

has really good fashion sense 

lowkey dresses like a fuckboi

donghyuck

sometimes you just wanna punch him in the face tbh

‘hey y/n can I borrow a pencil?’

‘do u have spare paper?’

‘can we share ur textbook’

but ofc u love him sm and he's ur study buddy

studying together mainly ends up with him lying on ur bed throwing a ball up in the air while u sit at ur desk and actually study

is so willing to quiz you with ur flashcards tho

beams so hard when u get something write while he's quizzing u

claims he’ll treat u to coffee afterwards but never does lmao

makes up songs and rhymes to help him remember formulas and equations

recites the quadratic formula song whenever u mention math (even if it has nothing to do with what ur learning)

always suggests going to cafes and parks and stuff to study then spends the entire time doing the opposite of studying

‘come onnn y/n u need to relax a bit’

texts u in the morning to ask u to bring him a spare calculator or something for a test bc he forgot his

claims u to be his life saver

probably has ur contact in his phone as ‘lifeline’ or something equally cheesy

really appreciates u tho

jaemin

literally the #1 study buddy

brings heaps of snacks whenever u study together

when its late he’ll text u and tell u to go to sleep

has every single study tip crammed into his head and regurgitates them all whenever u complain about having to study

furrows his brows when u say u didn't get enough sleep but doesnt say anything

he's probably popular af

flirts with the teachers and laughs when u elbow him to stop

soooo well known ?? like even people at other schools know him ??

has aesthetic notes tho

probably has his own studygram

wears soft sweaters to classes

literally just looks like he has his life in order

gets one bad grade and studies his butt off to improve

‘life is all about improving y/n we cant all be amazing at everything straight away’

keeps u sane tbh

like literally how has he not had a mental breakdown yet its the middle of the year

youve had four just this week

‘do u want me to bring u coffee this morning?’

chenle

studies with u all the time

but he doesnt actually study

he's just waiting for u to finish so u can go catch a movie or go out to eat

stays up late playing video games

*sips coffee* “I havent slept in six days”

doesnt even like the taste of coffee

all the teachers love him tho

like he's playful and cheery but is super respectful too

he's just really good w adults ?

sends u texts during class and u wonder how he hasn't been caught

probably has never had a detention

but has been close to getting one 1289823 times

that kid that carries around one 5-subject notebook and two pens and thats literally it

brings his own lunch but trades it for jisung’s lunchables

sneaks food off ur plate all the time in the cafeteria

smiles at everyone in the hallway

offers u a ride home as much as he can

or he catches the bus with you

and shares his headphones with u

jisung

probably that kid that takes aggressive notes in the back of the class

tells u to shut up during class (and its not so he can focus lmao)

tries to get all his work done in class so he has no homework

groans whenever the teacher gives u activities

makes a face whenever a new slide pops up on the board

lots of question marks in his notes

‘to find the derivative of an exponential, it stays the same?’

‘aerobic respiration occurs in three stages: ????, the Krebs cycle and the electron transport chain’

invites u over to play video games the night before a big test

‘its self care’

shut up jisung we all know u just need an excuse to hang out

the teachers convince him to sign up to be a tutor

makes u come to all his tutoring sessions

you go out to eat afterwards

and just chill on a park bench and eat food truck food until its getting late

offers u his jacket on the walk home

has really red cheeks that are ‘from the cold’

theyre not

[punkscowardschampions]

Carly & Ali & Caleb & Drew

Carly: [sends these boys a thirst trap] Ali: what she said Caleb: what you need Ali: [picture of the crowd of people 'cos 1. we're popular 2. we're going hard] Ali: enough to make it worth your while, bring all you got Drew: Bit harsh to your girlfriend that you reckon it weren't worth it from her snap Caleb: is it though? 😏 Caleb: we all 👀 her before Carly: [goes harder cos if you want a show boy challenge accepted] Carly: 😘 Ali: and you got rewarded for being a dickhead Ali: you can get here faster now Carly: ha Carly: idk why we r still talking when we could b not Carly: u wanna 👀 or u wanna touch Ali: 🤔 you both too exhausted from your busy day, yeah? Ali: n'awh Caleb: nah 💪🏾💪🏾 Ali: gonna need you to prove it, Cavante Drew: 👀 Walsh wants it but where's your proof 1st, like Caleb: what he said Ali: I get it, imagination is limited, but you really have no room between the two of your 🧠s to save it? Caleb: you got no room for attitude if you want your order filled before the party's over Ali: Well puts me in the mood that, nice one Ali: least your products better than your 🗣 Caleb: your 👄 is running the wrong way to put us in any mood Caleb: address that Carly: partys over then bye Carly: ill get 💊 from boys who know how to behave Ali: I'd sooner pay Ali: so your loss on every level Ali: hmu when you work out how to run a business and talk like a grown human Drew: C'mon bro, chill out Carly: 👶🏾 aw Caleb: you wanna be talked nice to all of a sudden? Caleb: 👌🏾 15 mins how's that? Drew: you need a party, drink a little, smoke something, you'll be ✌🏾👍🏾👊🏾 Ali: we're not going anywhere Carly: but up 🚀🌟🪐💫⭐️🚀 Ali: 🙏🙏🙏 Ali: closest imagery to me getting on my knees, you're welcome Caleb: 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾 I can get down with Ali: see how many rosaries I can get done 'fore you show up Carly: shes a 👼💙 if thats how u want it Ali: only for you, baby Carly: i want u however tho Ali: that's why I'm with you not them Carly: 💍💙 Drew: I look the most 👼 though, just saying Carly: wait ur turn for the 🙏💛 tho Carly: goldilocks energy u kno it gotta b right Drew: come on, I'm the one that's been nice to you the whole time Carly: ur cute Carly: make me feel good ill make u feel good too like Carly: im always that nice Ali: oh and bring a mate Ali: I wanna party forreal, so if Cavante ain't vibing Caleb: all you gotta do is let me make my apologies in person Ali: oh now I get it Ali: a preview would be fun Caleb: we're past the free taste, tica, I know what you want & I'm bringing the party Caleb: there's 👼🏾 too Ali: I know that Ali: @ your bro being mad problematic Drew: 😮😮 Caleb: he can't 👀 my 🙌🏾 it's his loss, it don't need to be yours Drew: I didn't agree to be bad cop now you wanna get some 🍯 back Caleb: there ain't no good cops, bruv Ali: 😂 Ali: how you two aren't locked up is beyond me Carly: happy u aint tho thatd b no fun Ali: no conjugals in young offenders Ali: also reckon you have to be married??? so that'd really make it a bummer Carly: even if we got u mood rings to fool the feds theyd just say u were 😢💔😒 no fun either Ali: 😏 Ali: so don't get caught, yeah? Ali: especially not tonight Caleb: 🙏🏾 for us Ali: [a picture because we are already and this is only getting messier] Ali: like this? Caleb: yeah, that'll work Carly: its working for me Ali: all you gotta do is be 👼🏾👼🏼👼🏻 Carly: 🤎💛💚💙 Drew: damn Drew: we'll make it 10 minutes Carly: what do u need to make it 5 Drew: why aren't you two together? 🤔 Carly: we r always together boy Drew: 📸s or it didn't happen Carly: [video because you gotta one up a fuck boy] Carly: k? Drew: 👌👌 Caleb: 👌🏾👌🏾 Ali: you two are always together and all Ali: so 👀👀 Carly: aw so much 🤎💛💚💙 in here Ali: could be more Carly: yea Ali: not afraid of a 📸 are you? Caleb: 👀 away, bro Caleb: [fuck boi pics] Drew: [own superior fuckboy pics tbh] Ali: not together but that's okay Ali: we'll take 'em when you get here Carly: so creative baby Carly: 🔮🎨🌠🎇 Ali: They're good subjects, I can admit that Carly: theyre k Ali: they're nothing on you obvs Ali: muse extraordinaire Carly: ur 🍑🍯🍒🍍 Ali: 🍓🐇🌹🐿🍄🐰🍓 Carly: ☀️🐅🌼💫🌻☄️🐯🌱🌊🪐🚀🍀 Drew: is this gay code Carly: ha Carly: if i was gay u wouldnt have a party invite Carly: ur hair aint that long or pretty Drew: yeah it's just for 👀👀 Carly: its for 💙💍 Carly: dont get it twisted Drew: 👌👌 Carly: i need her i dont need u Carly: cavante can come thru wit the drop if ur gonna b 👿 Ali: Caleb's being nice now Caleb: I got you 💪🏾✌🏾 Ali: you can be 😈 later Caleb: you know it Ali: that's why you're 💌 Caleb: & omw Ali: better be Caleb: it's better when you trust, you know that too Ali: not been the day for it Ali: 👀 is believing Caleb: [drug pics because he is on his way] Caleb: I look after you both, all you gotta do is ask Ali: You want it in words now too, yeah Caleb: what your girl said about unnecessary chat, we done the lip & 🙏🏾 service Ali: 🕐 Caleb: count it down, I'll be there when I said Carly: 🚀🚀🚀 Ali: patience ain't my virtue Carly: & i dont have any Drew: can handle needy Carly: yea? Drew: for the night Carly: have it then Ali: have anything you want Ali: everything Carly: you heard her Carly: its all here for u Carly: 💚💙

[flamebrain]

mattfoggy hcs, straight from the bastard empire sorry these all read like shitepostes(L O N G post under cut you’ve been warned)

WTNV au:

nightvale is just populated by like. vigilantes and other poewered people and foggy shoes up one day like. hey anyone need a lawyer? and the whole town falls in love w him

MURDERDOCK IS KEVIN

matt does radio and talks about foggys perfect hair and perfect teeth and foggy calls in like "heh, thanks dude, but aren't you like blind?" and matt shuts the call off immediatley

everybody knows matt is daredevil because he makes wink wink nudge nudge comments about it like 'ah. it appears that an entity has appeared near the dog park. castle appears to be on the scene now, and...ok, he's got a gun. i cant do anything about that, but my pal (noises of him scrambling and obviously knocking things over) daredevil might be able OKHERESTHEWEATHER" and it cuts off and like. he shows up 5 seconds later to kick frank in the face for using lethal measures AGAIN

EVERY TIME IT CUTS TO THE WEATHER AND THEN CUS BACK AND THE PROBLEM HAS BEEN SOLVED ITS JUST MATT. like. breathing just a little heavier than normal into the mic like. 'so it appears uh. the issue has been resolved thanks again to daredevil and his pal moon knight. such a shame i had to cower under my desk while the weather was on. ok goodnight'

the funky thing abt nightvale in this au is that it's basically just like. new york from 616 but foggy's like. from our earth so he's like HWAT THE FUCK AND AHIT IS GOING ON IN HERE ON THIS DAY AND WHY CANT I LEAVE he gets kidnapped by super villains on like his second day in town and immediatley regrets every life choice he's ever made

matt works at nightvale radio by day and conviently cuts to the weather every time something comes up so sometimes there's like. 7 half hour weather broadcasts a day and the townspeople just. humor him

foggy falls in love with matt after figuring out after .5 seconds that he's daredevil and he saved him from a bunch of baddies on like his second day and matt compliments him on the radio like every day and yeah they're fuckin good ok assorted stupid college hcs: matt and foggy like to chill in each other's beds. foggy doesn't notice that often because matt moves back b4 he gets back and matt pretends not to notice but  like. he can smell foggy was there. foggy. stop napping in this bed you're making my sheets smell like you, foggy, i KNOW they're silk and i know you think you're getting away with it but you're NOT,

matt, coming back into the dorm after being out for the day: foggy are you laying on my bed foggy, sitting up straight: nah pal. just sitting on the end for a minute hehe. just had to rest the old joints matt, knowing DAMN well that he was lying down a second ago and he's obviously lying but not being able to say anything; haha ok. move

hrnnn matt knows foggy is gay long before he tells him because he catches him in a lie about who he was out with but he can't say anything and like. he knows foggy is scared to tell him but he doesn't know how to bring it up and he's like. i want him to know he can trust me but i don't know how to tell him i know please foggy

foggys heart goes a mile a minute anytime the subject of being gay comes up around matt and matt wants to yell at him that it's OK and he doesn't care but his hints that he's fine with it seem to fly right over foggys head and so one day he gets so fed up with trying to convince foggy he's chill with gay people he just kisses him. wig

hrnnn. matt doesn't like the snow because it messes with his senses and he can't see but he can't say that to foggy so he just says he doesn't like the cold and foggys like "yeah doofus you weigh like three pounds you're skin and bone compared to me smh" and insists on cuddling him every time he sees matt get like That bc he thinks he's just chilly and it's. oddly comforting to matt because yeah. nobody really Holds him like that, and he Is Cold, and foggy is Warm,

matt gets Very touchey around people he's close with and so when he gets close with foggy he puts his arm around him a lot, rests his head on his shoulder, holds his arm even when they're not going anywhere, etc. foggys heart speeds up every time but matt just assumes that's what people hearts do when that happens because he doesn't really do that with anyone else and hey, he's happy when he does it and his heart maybe spikes a little too, but then he gets someone else's arm to lead him when foggys sick one week and their heart stays the exact same, what's up with that? so then he starts paying attention to all the people on campus, and the touching doesn't usually make the hearts go wild, but, well. matt 'sees' it happens and he's like HaHa, See, This is A Thing, and then he realizes that the people that have it happen to them? they're couples. and he just. freezes because first of all, Foggy- and at him- an- and second, his heart ALSO does a thing, so-

heres a rEALLY stupid unrelated au/hc i got after hearing a friends disater story hfdjhskja matt goes on a blind (hehe) date with a girl and it's pretty much a disaster, it turns out she brought her friend who is also meeting a guy at the same place, and like. she's obviously incredibly wack she says blind people are god's mistake and stupid shit like that so matt gets up halfway through their meal to go sit in the bathroom for 20 minutes while he thinks of an excuse to leave? and eventually a guy comes in and he's like 'uh hey, dude, you in here? your date grabbed her friend and left so we're both dateless now, thats a relief for me and unless you're just having incredibly bad bowel movements i think it's pobably one for you since you Have been in here for like half an hour uh im foggy by the way' and then they go back out and sit together and talk about how wack that fuckin was and like. inadvertent date

hey i can talk a lot of shit about how matt falls asleep on foggy but. sometimes foggy falls asleep on or next to or with matt and matt goes !!!! and he does not move and then he eventually falls asleep with foggy head on his shoulder and his head on foggys and when FOGGY wakes up and realizes matts still there and is ALSO asleep he doesn't move and eventually falls back asleep and then it's just like. waiting until the time aligns that they're both awake at the same time because neither wants to move and wake the other send tweet

SOULMATE AU:

foggy looks up from his college bed, sees matt, and suddenly EVERYTHING is fucking rainbow and he's like 'oh fuck. oh shit. wait. this is a dude' and matt's like 'is everything ok my guy?' because foggy's like. >:O and of course he has no idea because he's blind but foggy doesnt realise this and for a hot minute he;s like "OH FUCK. ITS ONE OF THOSE RARE OCASIONS WHERE HES PERFECT FOR ME BUT I'M NOT FOR HIM," and is about to s o b before he's like wait a fucking minute

yknow the au where like. the first words you hear from your soulmate are marked on your skin at birth? foggy's are 'excuse me', absolutley common, a chance meeting, and he stops jumping every single time he hears them after age 8 when he realises just how many times that phrase is said. matt's are 'yeah, who're you looking for,'  but he doesnt remember that, there's no constant reminder of it since he's blind, the nuns wouldn't tell him, the kids made up childish shit like 'poopoo', and stick DEFINITLEY wouldnt fucking tell him because hes stick and hes an asshead and eventually matt stops asking and caring. it takes WEEKS for after they meet for foggy to ask matt about his words and matt just says 'oh yeah, i dont remember. here" and shows foggy and when he sees them he's like. 'hm. sounds familiar' and forgets about it untill like two years later theyre drunk and talking about the first time they met and matt's like 'yeah you asked like 'who'm i looking for and then panicked because i was blind' and foggy's brain just like. short circuits for a whole ass minute and then when it clicks he just goes. "yOU"

TRANS MATT:

matt realises when he's still in the orphanage that mayhaps he hates being not a dude and haha! hes not gonna fucking come out to catholics he knows about That. he tries to tell stick, around the time their closest, and FUCK STICK he refuses to call him anything else or support him becaise stick is a peace of fuck shit FUCK STICK so that scars matt from coming out for a DAMN while so like. when he goes to college he introduces himself to everyone as matt and emails his proffesors like. 'hello please my name is redacted on your forms please call me matt its uh. a nickname' and he's not like. out to anyone but matt is close enought to his deadname that most people don't question it. foggy does, though, a little while after they meet, and matt is so fed up with not telling people and being called the wrong pronouns he just goes 'i want to be a guy ok' and goes absolutley APESHIT when foggy's like 'oh, cool. do you want me to use he pronouns for you' because wait. people are...ok sometimes? and matt's like. about to cry 

 alternatley: matt says "I don't wanna be a girl." and foggy goes "oh hey are you trans? same hat!" and then foggy tells matt like. binding tips and shit and theyre Good ok

deadpool kills transphobes, sm n dd just fucking beat the SHIT out of them in a back alley and like. they let DP know where they are but whatever happens happens :D

elektra, impaling two transphobes onto the side of a building with her knives: matthew, i know you can hear me, why

one day elektra sees matt has dumped a guy on her roof and just. sighs and goes back inside and matt waits for like 15 minutes before halfheartedly picking up the dude and dropping him off at franks.

matt dropped them off at nats One Time and she went apeshit and hunted down like 20 more of them.

foggy, holding a bat: cmon matt let me kill ONE matt: 'fine but if you get caught im not going to be your lawyer.'

INTO THE DEVILVERSE AU:

earth 14512/TRN700 (peni parker’s universe) matt murdock has a robot seeing eye dog who's also a vigilante

hddjdsjdhdn they all show up to earth 6's foggy and he just. sighs and all the devils start crying because He Is Here

hmm ok. canonically we know nothing about miles's matt but we know he exists and is known figure because miles knows of him but doesn't know he's daredevil i'm Prefty Sure so like. i'm gonna say he's just a successful lawyer who has radarsense but never got yoinked away from the orphanage by stick and never got training so like. hemndhdjsjnow the QUESTION is who finds that matt because there's a Very Different outcome depending on if like. murderdock meets him first or the matt from hobopeters universe does

hmm. murderdock comes in first like gwen does but doesn't out himself as competent w like swords and shit. but he OH HES THE OPPOSING FORCE FOR UH A COURT CASE MATT IS IN AND MATT HAS NO IFEA HOW SIMILAR THEY LOOK BECAUSE HES BLIND HRNNNNNHSHDHDHDJ and then matt from HP's universe comes in like HEY YOURE ME RIGHT. what the FUCK i need the laws in this dimension STAT and murderdock ':"sees" him and is like ah fuck. my goose may be uhhh cooked

ok mileses matt is like 'so what brought y'all here??? hhh????  and murderdock sighs and goes well my boss who's not really my boss from MY universe is doing something stupid here and opened a dimensional portal and it could maybe tear the multiverse apart which i guess i'm not stoked about' and matt's like 'who's your boss?' and murderdock begrudgingly says 'wilson fisk' and matt immediatley goes >:O because he's CONSTANTLY defending people who were injured as a result of what fisk and his company do

anyways. matt immediatley rushes to foggys because "foggys my partner, he's helped me deal with fisk, he knows him, he can help," and he swings open the door and like. one of two things happens actually either A: foggy is like matt. MAATT. AHAT IS GOING ON WH. WHY IS THERE A TALKING DEER WEARNING SPANDEX WHO CLIMBED THROIGH MY WINDOW MATT PLEASE HE SAYS HES Y O U or like. matt walks in and deerdevil is playing pattycake with robodog and daredevil noir is incessantly flirting with foggy and when matt comes in foggys like 'hey. i don't know what's going on but i think i'm trading my best friend'

murderdock is like...the cool college student who tells freshies about weed murderdock: so, you don't know how to fight right  matt: no??? i'm blind??? md: but you can kinda see right. matt: yeah like a radar kinda md: normal blind people can't do that you know matt: they wHAT md: you can listen to heartbeats if you try hard enough. you can tell when people are lying matt: i can W H A T md: yeah. what me to teach you how to kill a man matt: W H AT NO IM A L A W Y E R WH

hrnnn the matts in this universe push our matt away to stay with foggy because he doesn't deserve 2 die and you KNOW every matt pushes people away but foggy is like. matt i know you tried it's ok i lov you buddy and he's like HRGGHHHH FUNCK YOU and makes foggy tell him stories untill he can distinguish lies and hide in a place around their office untill matt can like. find him instantly and training montage shit you feel me and he rolls up to the collider in his black pjs like "hello my fellow devil men. i hear you all have no plan. well. i don't either but i'm here" and one matt is like. how did you go-OH YOU DID IT and all the mats high five and cry a littlethey're still reluctant to let matt come help but they're all like. "we're all depressed and suicidal anyways we all have big guilt and if we didn't let him i lnOW he's gonna have big guilt forever he can stay"

THE PENUMBRA PODCAST AU:

foggy is a private eye, kinda depressed a lil bit, and he works w his secretary karen who helps him with tech and stuff because he is god awful at all that 

"mike whatevermaggiesmaidennameis" is an occult specialist from dark matters agency assigned by an agent natasha of dark matters to help him with his current case. 

foggy does NOT want to do this with any damn occultist or whatever the hell but before he can escape mike shows up and god DAMN is he charming and catches him before he can climb out the window, so. that's that for introductions. anyways, hijinks, elektra is cassandra, if you care listen to the murderous mask, anyhoo foggy stars to notice something is kinda weird about matt but brushes it off. they finish investigating and retrieve an important artifact.

it's cold, mike says. sorry dude, all the places near here are closed, foggy says. is your place? mike asks. oh, says foggy they go back to foggys place and maybe make out a little bit, but foggy realizes oh shit, mike just tried to steal the keys to my safe where i stored the artifact, shit, and plaxces him under arrest before he can do anything, and calls the cop cops.

they come to take mike away, and minutes later foggy finds a note, scrawled INCREDIVLY messily, in his pocket. "sorry," it says, "i wasn't tricking you about anything i said, and i meant everything i did. -matt murdock ps. check around, say, X avenue. you may have to do a bit of cleanup." when foggy checks cameras that overview there, he find the officers that took murdock from his apartment hogtied together, and sees their clothes strewn on the ground - forming letters - with love. their car is gone. PODCAST AU:

matt listens to podcasts a lot right and so foggy is like hmm mayhaps this is a good idea. but the type of podcasts they listen to differs so incredibly like matt listens to serial and the wildest one he listens to is probably judge john hodgman whereas foggy listens to shitpost podcasts like mbmbam and can i pet your dog foggy keeps referencing mbmbam around matt because he just assumes that he listens to it and matt is so confused every time and one day foggy says "damn matt you're really horny for this one huh" and matt just snaps and says FOGGY WHAT DO YOU M E AN

so then they are like oh shit you're not listening to the good ones. no YOURE not listening to the good ones. solution?  listen together which means sharing earbuds which means sitting next to eachother on small college bed which means????? cuddling

also eventually they decide fuck it. let's make our own podcast and they combine the mbmbam and jjh format so they get questions and do goofs and stuff and then give actual legal advice but sometimes foggy will be like "ok. here's what you do. you need a cat? go into the pet shelter and take one. what are the gonna do beat you up with their cat toys? didn't think so." and matt starts crying because "Fo g g y WE ARE LAWYERS I KNOW YOURE GOOFING BUT THATS ILLEGAL FOGGY YOI CANT TELL OUR LISTENERS TO GO DO CRIME"

COFFE SHOP AU:

matt has a caffeine addiction and constantly comes to foggys coffee shop and orders one black coffee every morning and foggy eventually is like. hey buddy. do you EVER drink ANYTHING F U N EVER

matts like...no...i need coffee as strong and dark as my soul... and foggys like ok edglelord. wait up i'm about to change your life

foggy makes him a latte that's just a little bit caramelly but not too sweet and he's like here. drink this. no charge you deserve to live a little. also here's your boring edgy coffee you still have to pay me for that one. matt tries it and he's like hmm. not bad, but just not. Good and foggy is like wow fuck you. i'm going to find a good drink for you that isn't this hell water so every morning matt comes in and foggy gives him a black coffee and a free Fun and Cool coffee on the house

matt always is polite even when foggy can tell he DESPISES what foggy made but he's not going to stop untill he finds something god damn it matt

ok anyways they start meeting up more. matt starts taking his breaks in the coffee shop and and foggy hmmm...always seems to have a shift off when matt comes down..hmm. coincidence....hmmm....theo suffers for him by covering all his shifts when matt comes in and he's like well, actually fuck work

eventually foggy is like hey dude. do you wanna test my drinks before they go on the menu or help me perfect my recipes and shit you have a good toungie right (matt goes apeshit, because fuckin FOGGY YOU CABT SAY THAT) but he's like haha yeah. that'd be fun. haha

and then foggy finds out matt is INCREDIBLE at baking when he hands him a cookie and matt goes. hmm. too much flour add a fourth a cup less and a pinch more of saltand he's like??? bitch. i'd like to see you do better. and then matt does

so basically every day foggy closes up a little earlier and lets matt in and they dick around in the kitchen and bake and make coffee and foggys shop gets more and more popular because hey this already really good joint just started selling the most BALLER carrot cAke waht the fucké

anyways fall comes around and foggy is like GUES WHATT ITS TIME FOR WHITE GIRL DRINKS TRY THIS and he gives matt a pumpkin spice latte and matt is like. •.• THIS IS IT. THATS THE ONE

and foggy starts crying MATT PLEASE YOU HAVE TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME. PKEASE MATT, MATT I CANT ADD PSL YEARROUND BECAUSS YOURE A BASIC WHITE BITCH MATT

he bullies foggy into keeping the latte on the menu by threatening to stop helping him bake and foggy is SO OFFENDED, on behalf of good taste everywhere, matt, please,

anyways foggy continues rags on matt for only liking the shittiest fucking drink god damn it matthew fucking hell i make you 3 billion and THIS is the one you pick you disaster and matt is like haha shut up. stoopid

foggy doesn't, and you can guess where this be headed because i'm gay and soft,

matt kisses him and foggys like. ?????????? and matt goes AH FUCK. I COULDNT THINK OF A BETTER WAY TO GET YOU TO SHUT YOUR MOUTH SORRY. GUESS ILL GO and foggy throws cookie dough at him and drags him back over because he's not leaving fuck that. fuck you. and then they're happy and domestic the end

wait i lied matt opens a pro-bono firm in the back of foggy's shop and he gives all his clients freshly baked dessert and coffee and he's so good at being a lawyer and foggy becomes so good @ running his shop that customers keep coming and they're the Cute Gay Couple everyone knows abt and loves

ACCIDENTAL (?) KISSING:

SO. there are so many god damn moments foggy nearly fucking breaks and smooches matt out of sheer unbridled uwu soft feelings. SO MANY. when they win their first mock trial together and matt looks so FUCKING happy and he tells foggy how good they work as a team and foggy is about to lose his mind but he just goes. 'haha yeah' and gives matt a fist bump they finish taking the bar: matt's had to take it in a seperate room, stupid blind accommodations. he finishes first because OF COURSE HE DOES HE'S MATT MURDOCK and the second foggy finishes and leaves the room he sees matt there and he's filled with so many emotions he's about to go apeshit but he manages to contain them JUST enough not to make out with matt on the spot but gives him the tightest fucking hug and matt's like "ok buddy! love you too! please dont break my ribs!" and foggys too happy to notice matt forgot to flinch like he didnt know foggy was coming

Foggy gets the sign to matt and he can tell how fuckin stoked matt is and all he can think about is how grateful he is that the two of them get to work together and fucking do GOOD together and he's trying to express that in his awkward foggy way and he's GOING to kiss him right then and there!! hes about to do it look out world!!! and then matt says "you're NOT going to kiss me" and foggy realises haha YEAH THATD BE A BAD IDEA HUH and jokes it off and gives matt another hug - "i'll be careful not to break the ribs this time, buddy, seems like you've been falling over and hurting yourself enough recently,"-

foggy almost kisses matt out of anger when he finds out he's daredevil, when he won't shut up about how this city needs him and foggy would have done the same and blah, blah, bullshit because maybe then he'd FUCKING listen to him, or at least it'd shut him up, but the honest betrayal he feels - at matt for not telling him and at himself for STILL having a part of him that wants to kiss matt - is enough to get him just to leave : ^)

alright. the gang is watching fisk get carted away and see that SHIT, he's broken out, of course it wasnt going to be this easy. matt puts karen in a taxi goes to run off and foggy grabs him by his coat because MATT. you're not going to go fight fisk in your god damn pajamas right now it's too dangerous you're going to die you stupid son of a bitch idiot

and of course matt doesn't listen, he tells foggy to get back into the car with karen, go to his place, they'll be safe there, and grabs his own taxi

and foggy's left to sit there with karen in the cab as it drives Oh Too Fucking Slowly to matt's, and he's mumbling curses all the way and karen is trying to calm him down, he doesnt know why he's so worried, and all foggy can think about is what if matt dies because i didnt stop him and what if karen never gets to hear it from him and about 10 billion what-ifs that wont leave him the FUCK alone, and he sits next to the windowsill he knows matt comes in through and waits, not even wanting to look at the tv because what if he sees worse news Hrgh

matt beats up fisk and he barely even waits for the cops to get there, he gets one look and confirms 'yup, that's mahoney,' and fucking BOOKS it to his apartment, he climbs through the window and foggy's just sitting there waiting, karens in the next room watching the broadcast at a 3 minute delay on her phone, matt doesnt have a tv hes BLIND >:,\

and when matt comes in, bloody and beaten up and doing That Panting Thing He Does, but definitley alive, foggy just fucking. grabs him by the shoulders and kisses him because HE IS A L I V E !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and matt is suprised but he doesnt even try to protest because he's still riding the adrenaline from the fight

anyways. foggy pulls away for air and says 'you're so fucking stupid and i hate you' and then matt kisses hIM because uhh, thats FOGGY

and it's a minute later that matt senses another heartbeat and realizes karen's standing in the doorway, and she raises an eyebrow and obviously trying not to panic asks 'uh, foggy, pray tell, buddy, why you're making out with the devil in matt's bedroom' and foggy goes apeshit and tries to think of an excuse that doesn't invole 'uh thats matt' but it just kinda comes out as some stupid shit like 'i,,, uh,,,,, secret,...affair,,?i',m....gay." and matt just sighs and pulls off his helmet like "hey karen. it's me. hey karen whats poppin its me blind matt murdock" and needless to say they all have a Lot to talk abt

DRUNK KISSING:

so like. the first year they're together matt and foggy go out a lot, and it's mostly foggy dragging matt places and matt reluctantly coming because A) if someone doesnt watch foggy this idiot is going to puke and pass out in a ditch and B) he really like his company shh. no telling because that gay

anyways matt usually only drinks a little but foggy is mad lightweight right. he doesn't get shitfaced too often, usually only after exams or when he knows he has no classes the next day. when he does get shitfaced though he absolutley loses his shit and becomes even more touchy than usual, which is VERY TOUCHY because fuck you its my au and i get to choose the default affection levels

so basically. once foggy starts hugging matt and leaning on him and whining into his shirt about the 'hot girls' and 'killer nachos' at the party matt knows it's time to head home and foggy is too busy wrapping his arms around matt to notice he's being dragged out untill its too late

and y'know, thats fine, that's usual, all normal friend stuff, except what foggy also has a tendancy to do when he's drunk is kiss matt. sometimes its on his cheeks, or his forehead, or his shirt?? matt doesnt get that one??? and sometimes foggy even tries to go for the lips when hes particularly wilde. matt knows to expect this by the third time they go out, but it's still always a suprise when it happens, because sometimes it'll be out of nowhere when theyre walking back, or foggy'll stop matt and grab his cheeks and kiss him? sometimes they'll get all the way back to the dorm and matt will make foggy lie down and foggy will grab his shirt and pull him close enough to give him a quick peck before rolling over and promptly beggining to snore

which, y'know, is absolutley great for a maybe-gay-for-his-best-friend-catholic. what's also great is that foggy never seems to remember the fact he kissed matt the night before, and if he does, he definitley does NOT bring it up

so that's fine. whatever. thats life and matt will pretend like he doesnt care when foggy gives him a smooch because hes straight and loves girls and jesus christ, no homo, amen

but THEN. . then matt and foggy have been studying for exams for weEKS and theyre FINALLY DONE, FINALLY, and they are both going to get wasted out of their mINDS you better BELIEVE IT

so they do! and eventually they stumble back to their dorm together and sit together on the floor with a half-downed bottle of tequila and matt decides fuck it. he tells foggy he's never kissed a guy and foggy is like "haha cool. i have." matt's like "haha was it good" and foggys like "hell yeah man better than girls" so matts like hmm. "foggy i think i want to kiss a guy" and you can guess where this is goin

foggy is an oblivious little shit and just thinks matt's having a gay awakening so he's like "oh cool" and matt starts vibrating at inhuman frequency because FOGGY THIS IS THE ONE TIME I"M BASICALLY ASKING YOU TO DRUNK KISS ME AND YOU D O N T" so he just goes "haha yeah." and foggy's like "haha yeah"

and then matt chugs the bottle of tequila and says "foggy i think i wanna kiss you" and then he does but he's a good christian and also stupid so he just like. goes mwah on foggy's cheek

and foggy stares at him for like 15 seconds before basiclly challenging him to 'kiss him like a man, murdock, how are you supposed to get the gay experience if you dont go all in' and then they make out for like 20 minutes and life is good

(they both wake up w the worst fucking hangovers and theyre passed out on the floor and matt's like "foggy....im gay..." and foggys like "haha do you remember i kissed you" and matts like "????foggy i kissed YOU" and foggys like "oh yeah you did. you should have done that earlier" and matts says "????you were too busy trying to kiss me" and foggy goes "oh haha i was. cool" and then they fall back asleep...then they.....boyfriend.s)

FLOWER SHOP/TATTOO ARTIST AU:

so. matt is a florist and he runs a little shop across the street from an empty piece of real estate. a tiny place that used to be a deli but had just the WORST sandwiches, it was no wonder they closed down, god damn. anways. matt runs his shop with his best friends kirsten and karen who have IMPECCABLE taste in flowers and less impeccable taste in impulse control and not being huge lesbians.

one day this dude pulls up into matt's shop. his request is maybe the strangest matt's ever heard - 'can you get me two bouquets of like, the most metal flowers you have? like, ones that just look super cool but also, yknow, smell super good and sick and shit?' 

matt laughs, and tells the guy that yeah, he can't help with the looks part, but he'll make sure to get him some that smell 'quote' sick and shit, come back tomorrow morning and they'll have some ideas-hey, what are these for anyways?

and the guy tells him, oh, hah, i'm moving in across the street, opening a little tattoo place? wanted some flowers to make it seem more, uhh....welcoming. matt laughs and says yeah, sure, cool, and tells him if he has anymore questions to call the store and ask for matt. the guy tells him if he ever wants a tattoo just cross the street and ask for foggy and unless the flowers matt gives him really suck he won't do him dirty and tattoo a dick on him

so anyways, they have a couple meetings, foggy decides on the flowers he wants and thanks matt and tells him hey, he should come check out the shop, it's opening tomorrow, and foggy wants to be able to point to the guy who did the sick florals. matt doesnt have anything better to do and he likes the sound of this guy's voice so hell, he might as well

when he goes over matt realizes oh shit. he really is out of his element here, but he asks the guy at the counter for 'foggy' and is led over to  a corner where foggy's sitting and tattooing...himself? and matt realizes hey. i kind of have no idea what this dude looks like

so he sorta. sits there awkwardly untill he asks like. 'uh. i cant actually see what youre doing' and foggy goes OH IM SO FUCKING STUPID. i'm. man, saying this out loud seems kinda really stupid and cheesy i cant believe i have to do this...i'm....it's one of the flowers in the bouquet you made me....i just thought it looked really neat and smelled good and it....kinda reminds me of you and OK i KNOW that sounds really weird we met like 4 days ago BUT you seem super cool and i kinda hope we can maybe like. be friends or hang out or something,

and matt's like. o//////o yeah okay. uh. thats cool. thats cool uh im sure the flower is really pretty haha i love that type haha UH DO YOU WANT TO GET LUNCH OR SOMETHING haha maybe ill get a flower tattoo one day its pretty cool that you do tattoos UH IM FREE TOMOROW WAIT MAYBE THATS TOO SOON IM SORRY UH IM FREE WEDNESDAYS,

and foggy just kinda laughs and says 'no, tomorrow works,' and hey! they make plans and get coffee together and matt's like so. what tattoos do you have and foggy starts listing a bunch and eventually matt's like :( i wish i could see them they sound beautiful and foggy's like. here. heres my arm can i. yeah ok. and he grabs matts ar,m and he's like ok. feel the skin, its still a little raised can you feel that? ok, run your fingers over here and i can like. tell you wjats there

cue like an hour of sensual arm touching and tattoo explaining and the more matt learns about foggy and his tattoos and the more he hears the way he talks the more he's like A) oh fuck, i kinda really like this guy whos letting me feel up his arms and B) do i want a tattoo? i kind of want a tattoo

anyways. time jump they hang out a bit more, foggy always comes into matt's shop and talks to him in between customers, shows him the patterns he's designing, etc, and one day he comes in with a paper that has a design of some flowers on it and shows it to matt and as he's running his fingers across it he stops and says 'foggy? will you do this to me'

and foggys like 'bud are you sure? first tattoo, right, do you-are you really sure you want to do this, like, when, and wh" and matt's like 'shut up and put this ink in my skin before i chicken out' so matt sits through a PAINFUL ASS TATTOO and when it's done he's like FOGGY CAN I TOUCH IT CAN I TOUCH IT FOGGY CAN I TOUCH IT and foggy has to physically restrain matt from fondling his tattoo because its FRESH MATT

so foggys like 'ok, this is cause for celebration! babys first ink! we;re getting beers cmon' and they both go out to drink and matt's like 'hey foggy...can i touch more of your tattoos' and foggy's like 'uh, sure, i have another armfull,' and they do that for a while untill matt gets to the one foggy did the first time he visited foggy's tattoo parlor and foggy's like hah. remember this one? and matt's like yeah. i do. and they kinda just. sit there for a minute and then foggy's like 'ok. im gonna kiss you now punch me if you hate this, flowerboy' and matt absolutley does not punch him, thank you very much

and when they finish having their moment matt's like 'wow. i shoulda....i shoulda asked to feel you up again way sooner if i knew you were gonna do that' and foggy's like 'hey...i'd let you feel me up anytime' and they both kind of laugh and decide ok, worm, this works, and decide theyre gonna do that more often

they start to go out for drinks / dinner / lunch / any time they possibly can, and matt learns the curvature of foggys (suprisingly muscley?) arms down to a t, but he runs out of space to run his fingers over one night, and foggy kisses him and says 'hey. i've got more tattoos, y'know, but i don't think many people would appreciate it if i showed them off to you here' and matt is like 'wh-O H'

and foggy laughs and drags him to his apartment and pulls of his shirt and says 'ok, we're alone now. tell me what you feel' and matt sits on the bed in front of him and theres lots of sensual chest stroking going on and then yeah. matt gets fed up with all this touching foggy and not enough of foggy touching him and. they fuck oopsie

and after that they decide worm. that was good, wanna do that more often, holy shit, and decide to actually date date and thats like. thats that babey!

but years later they open a joint shop, an absolute mess of soft/punk aesthetics and everyone knows them because matt is still a soft florist who just has a fewwwww dozen flowers inked all over him and foggy is the punk god who flexes his sleeves all over town but flexes his soft boyfriend husband even more tHE END

[soliiel]

uhh tell us about your dreams, an unpopular opinion, and random rants about things?

literally my only dream rn is to be able to live with a couple of friends without having to worry about shit bay bee! sadly that doesnt seem to be a possibility :/

you know what im gonna combine the unpopular opinion with the ranting thing and i think i might as well put it under a read more because i tend to. ramble a lot!

so long story short for those that dont know me i have really bad food allergies ya know the kind that can kill you in under 5 minutes if you fuck up? yea those. and theyre kinda ruining my life softly but anyway yesterday i was extra upset because everyone was telling me that i could never live with roommates due to the danger and the fact that i cant really just tell them what to eat and what foods to bring into the house and shit ya know? 

but the thing is that nearly every time someone tells me that they follow it with something like “oh dont worry tho you can still have a family! your future significant other would be willing to make that sacrifice!” and you know what? thats fucked up!

not only the part where its implied that somehow asking for people to let me have an environment where im safe is some sort of selfish but like. why do we consider romantic relationships to be so much more important? why do we act like its the only important one. why do people assume that someone with who you have a platonic relationship with would never care about you as much? 

idk man but i feel like thats weird and shit ya know? not good. @ the aro people out there; im so fucking sorry apparently people are whole dumbasses and youre stronger than any us marine.  you dont have to be in some sort of romance with someone to care about them. thats fucked up. care about your friends yall. tell them you love them. idk i cant form any normal sentences rn i guess ill come back to the subject one day but like. yea unpopular opinion but society is way too obsessed with romantic relationships siri send post

[kakyoin-did-you-lay-this-egg]

please, please quench my unending thirst for the stands and provide me with some headcanons involving the duwang boys (and yukako, please) with a soft, affectionate romantic interest who is very fond of their stands - they're always holding their hands, and stealing quick little kisses when they think the user isn't paying attention, and always have nothing but nice things to say about them and their abilities ♥ thank you so much, i am dyi n g （ゝω・）

First of all, I love you. Secondly, I love this request. Im sorry this took so long, I was trying to cut back on everything and this is about as minimal as I could get so I apologize immensely 

Josuke

- When he first introduced Crazy Diamond to them, he was expecting things along the lines of ‘So cool!’ or ‘Oh wow!’, so seeing them fawn over ‘how adorable’ Crazy D is kinda shocks him

- He likes to bring Crazy D out whenever he thinks youre not paying him enough attention. He knows how much you love Crazy D and would use any given opportunity to kiss his soft lips

- Depending on if you also have a stand, sometimes a wild Crazy D will appear to give you or your stand smooches in class

- When youre walking home or just chilling, if Josuke is holding your hands, he will bring up his trusted spirit friend to hold the other. This is why you have 2 hands, so don’t be shy

- Crazy D is the stand most likely to steal smooches when his user isnt looking. When Josuke feels the soft touch of your lips through the phantom feeling of his stand he blushes

- Sometimes if Josuke is too shy to show you affection, this is then his handy dandy stand will come to the rescue!

- Please squeeze Crazy D’s cheeks, he does the blep thing & it’s enough to make anyones heart melt

Okuyasu

- He is hesitant at first, Since The Hand can like, ya know, erase you from existence and whatnot. But after youve told them both ‘yes it’s okay’ and ‘yes you won’t accidentaly disappear’ you can see Oku visibly relax, but The Hand is still a little scared he twiddles his fingers when hes nervous it’s so cute

- Okuyasu knows that The Hand looks a lil sad, so when he sees you holding his hand or giving him kisses, he feels double the love bc his stand is basically him, right?? And youre just showing both sides of him affection, even if one is a large humanoid robot thing that can destroy anything in a single swipe

- Oku really appreciates the compliments, seeing as how his dad & brother never really had anything nice to say. Maybe that’s why The Hand is always so sad??. You will see him blush furiously, while his stand starts fiddling with it’s hands (no pun intended)

- Okuyasu doesn’t mind you being affectionate, as long as you show him some love too! He will sometimes get jealous if youre giving more kisses and hugs to The Hand than him. It’s nothing cuddling can’t fix tho

- The Hand is pretty shy, so most of the time your affection is returned with the biggest blush youve ever seen, please be kind to him

- Oku likes to pretend he doesn’t notice you kissing The Hand when hes not looking, but you can see the corners of his mouth raise slightly after each small kiss

- Oku and The Hand both tend to get more excited when the love interest is around, not only are they cute, but theyre so generous with their affection, how can they stay away??

Koichi

- Depends on which acts youre admiring. The first 2, yes, he will blush and scramble to compliment you back. He sometimes will try to show off his powers by playing innocent pranks on Okuyasu. If it’s act 3, he will be a little hesitant to introduce the two of you. I mean, youve seen the things he says, would you really let him near your love interest? (I’m a firm believer that sentient stands can say what their users are really thinking)

- If youre meeting Act 1, he will be almost as excited as you are! He just got his stand and is still learning about it, so talking to his love interest about his cool ability will cause his to seem a little more flustered and speak in an almost rushed manner.

- Kissing Act 1? Congrats, you broke Koichi.

- If youre meeting Act 2, he’s a bit more relaxed, he would also tell you about Echoes first act, and how his stand has not only evolved in ability, but looks too.

- He wouldn’t mind you kissing Act 2, or even holding him. He just asks that if you do, remember that he can feel what his stand does and asks that you don’t squeeze him to hard

- If youre meeting act 3, Koichi is gonna warn you first before anything. Telling you that his stand has ‘a mind of it’s own’ and that he may say some ridiculous things. So when you finally do meet Act 3, and not only are you surprised to see that your compliments are returned,but with flirting as well. When Echoes starts to speak things that may seem risque is when Koichi will have to politely cut in and either send Echoes back or ask for a  subject change

- Kissing Echoes is a gamble. There are always things that you don’t expect to happen. One time you gave him a kiss & he pinched your ass. (Koichi wouldn’t summon Echoes after that for a few days) Sometimes Echoes will make a show of it to let Koichi know ‘I’m kissing them. What are you gonna do about it?’ and then Koichi gets jealous and sends Echoes back again. Echoes will sometimes show you the same affection you show him thrown in with an innuendo and Koichi swears up and down he has ‘no idea here Echoes learned that from’

Rohan

- He will at first wonder why you have admiration for his stand. Not that he doesnt like it, he just doesn’t understand it, but still will bring out Heavens Door just to see you smile. ‘So youll leave me alone while I draw’ he says

- He usually brings out Heavens Door whenever youre around but hes busy sketching, so his stand can keep you company.

- If you show affection to his stand, he will pretend to not notice or ‘scold’ you.  But deep down, we all know that he loves it

- He feels like if youre kissing and holding his stands hand, it means you want to do the same with him, right??

- He will sometimes feel overwhelmed, what with all the affection being shown to his stand, and the fact that he works himself to the bone to finish his manga, he may sometimes be brash & call Heavens door back, leaving you to sulk

- When complimenting his stand, he acts arrogant. Of course his stand is amazing, do  you know who he is? But he can’t help the small smile that comes to his face seeing how excitedly you talk about his stand

- He will get jealous of his stand every now and then, and he feels a little petty for it. Like, why is he jealous of a spirit? Him, Kishibe Rohan? Unacceptable.

Yukako

- She takes amazing care of her hair, so finally allowing her love interest to see what all her hair can do will kinda be her way of showing them how no one else can compare to her

- She doesn’t really mind you playing in her hair as long as it’s where she won’t be seen if you decide to do a crazy style

- She does this little blush when you compliment her stand, after this she tries to show you more cool things she can do, even going as far as to help you using it

- She loves the compliments, and uses them as means to flood you in compliments as well

- She will come to you some days, saying her arms are tired from brushing her luxurious locks and asks (demands) you brush them. Mainly, she wants you to run your fingers through her hair, she already did all the brushing

Jotaro (cause part 3 Jotaro is my fav)

- He at first is hesitant to show you Star. After everything he’s seen, could you blame him? But once he warms up to the initial idea, youll see him tugging his hat down more often

- He sometimes uses Star to help him with his research, so if you were to, lets say, abruptly grab his stands hand while it was scouting the ocean for star fish, you can hear Jotaros quick intake of breath from the sudden gesture

- Jotaro knows his stand is powerful, hes defeated countless people, but hearing his love interest compliment him is different. He mutters his usual catchphrase, pulls down his hat and even blushes at the tips of his ears. Just don’t torture him too much

- The few occurrences where he has Star out for non educational purposes, maybe Star is looking at some of the many sea animal photos, you can sneak in a few smooches before Jotaro asks you what exactly youre doing.

- Star sometimes will convey the emotions Jotaro wont, so expect lots of mixed signals. But always listen to Star, Star knows whats best even if Jotaro doesn’t always agree

[mercenarypark]

medic hcs

Em made a big hc post for heavy a few days ago [here] and ive been meaning 2 finally do the same w/ medic bcause im gay

note: while i try to be brief about the details, this post is about a gay jewish man in Germany during wwii. to set aside any initial worries, no, he is never kept in the camps- as a jewish person myself it sickens me deep in my stomach to even think of that possibility. but there’s still mentions of n/zism and antisemitism, as one would expect.

also, a fair amount of the details of my medic hcs for his childhood are based on the german side of my family, primarily my grandfather and his father. while i still only know a little about my family history[tm], details like medic’s last name, how his family were able to lay low, etc, are based on the little bits and pieces ive heard from my grandmother #antisemitism #nazism #homophobia #transphobia #satanism #long post #text heavy #tf2 #gore text #medical abuse #malpractice #experimentation mention 

-Medic was born roughly around 1925- he’s in his early 40s around when the game takes place- to the name [redacted] Reichstein. the Reichsteins were reviled in their little town as mad doctors, which was at least somewhat true- they certainly weren’t shy to experimentation on body parts and [willing] subjects. but a good part of the hatred for them stemmed from Good Old Antisemitism, focusing their hate on the fact that they were an openly jewish family and saying that that must be influencing their occasionally morally dubious behavior

-for the longest time, though, people tolerated them- they were the only doctors around, after all. but as time went on, the disgusted glances turned to hate speech, turned to violent threats, and eventually, to violent actions.

-medic’s father, who had long since been debating on moving, finally packed the family up[against his wife’s wishes], and within a night, their home and lab were deserted.

-his father could tell that something terrible was coming. he brought down an ultimatum- they would have to abandon everything jewish about themselves in order to survive. medic was young, still, and didn’t fully understand the severity of why his father seemed so adamant that they never mention holidays they once celebrated, why their old family photos were torn and burned, why his mother was constantly reprimanded when her Yiddish roots showed through her accent

-medic’s father pulled a few favors, and before they moved into a new city, the family name was changed to Reich- a more acceptable, more German name. Reichstein could raise eyebrows, lead to questioning about jewish roots, but there have always been many Reichs in Germany.

-that’s also when Medic got his birthname changed to Ludwig, and he and his mother had to fight like hell for that. his father argued that the last thing they needed was another target on their back- if anyone found out that his son “wasn’t really a boy”, then that would bring the entire family under scrutiny and into danger.

-ludwig refused to take no for an answer. ludwig had always been someone who would rather die than pretend that he’s something he’s not, and this was one of the first signs of that. while he didnt fully understand his connection to judaism, yet, and thus didnt fight to keep it at the time; he DID understand that he wasn’t a girl, and by God did he refuse to pretend otherwise.

-eventually his father relented, though he never once forgot and throughout medic’s childhood, he would bring up how risky it was, how medic was potentially endangering them all.

-to clarify: his father DID technically accept his son being transgender, but he wanted him to repress it, ignore it, force it down and never bring it up, much like their jewish heritage. ludwig refused, and his father never liked that. [when ludwig grew older and became both openly gay AND became a practicing jew again, his father nearly had a fucking heart attack]

-ludwig was heavily isolated for most of his childhood after they moved, partially due to the war’s beginning, partially because his father was afraid of his son giving something away. he was homeschooled by his mother, and rarely left the house, instead spending most of his time playing with the family’s cockatoo, or in his father’s operating room, learning human anatomy

-this isolation[alongside his autism, and veritable cocktail of mental illnesses] helped contribute to medic’s general inability to understand how to interact with people- he is oblivious at the best of times, has no concept of personal space, rarely catches social cues, and has Awful attachment issues. he is overly affectionate with anyone he is even vaguely friendly with, he tends to ramble and talk about uncomfortably personal things without realizing its a bad thing, etc, etc, he is a mess and a half

-he does understand bits and pieces- for example, if he’s physically affectionate with someone, they tend to tense up, and try to get away from him, which means he’s doing something wrong. the problem is that he doesnt understand WHAT he’s doing wrong, or why it’s wrong[answer: he’s covered in blood and bird shit and holding at least one[1] human liver]

-speaking of physical affection, the first time engineer affectionately puts a hand on medic’s shoulder medic fucking freaks out because aside from his parents, NO ONE. no one has ever initiated Friendly Physical Contact with him. usually because theyre freaked out by him in some way. he has no idea how to cope with the fact that someone might actually think of him in a friendly manner to the point of expressing that physically [aside from sexually, which is a whole other story and a half]

-but im getting ahead of myself. the first time ludwig killed a man was when he was 17. a nazi soldier paid an unexpected visit to the Reichs. ludwig, scared for his family’s sake and overwhelmed with a boiling hatred for nazis that had simmered for all of his childhood, killed the man

-his father reacted violently, ranting that now they were doomed, but his mother helped ludwig destroy the body and evidence. by the grace of God, no other nazi followed up that visit- the soldier hadn’t told anyone where he was going, and there had been no witnesses to his visit. and germany was so chaotic at the time, that eventually the man's death was attributed to a previously unnoticed casualty in battle

-that was the first man ludwig killed, and also the first of many, many nazis. he spent a good stretch of his adult life hunting down nazis who had gone under the radar, trying to hide their past ties while still keeping the same disgusting views.

-as ive mentioned, in medical school, ludwig not only became openly gay, but returned to his jewish roots. no longer under his father's roof, and now that the war was over, medic saw no reason to hide aspects of himself any longer. and God help everyone who felt otherwise. especially once the most violently hateful dissenters, began to mysteriously disappear.

-throughout his adult life medic has had Multiple short term, non-serious relationships [including more than his fair share of one night stands], and maybe two serious relationships prior to heavy. neither of those ended well, citing ludwigs mental Fuckery as a big issue. speaking of, his mental fuckery has helped him get into at least a couple abusive relationships, which i wont detail beyond "he survived and healed".

-while he is Jewish, he is the kind of jew who criticizes god every step of the way. at least part of this is due to having to survive during the Shoah.

-the Shoah definitely fucked his mind up. the constant fear for his parents and himself, and the burning hatred for the nazis and everyone who agreed with them or stood back and let them take over, and just overall a horrible sense of helplessness, definitely contributed to a lot of his future mental fuckery, and to his feelings about God. as an adult, and as a doctor, he took the feeling of helplessness he had as a teenager, and flipped it around dramatically- if god didnt help him then, he’d have to become better than god. he would bring retribution where others didnt, and bring power and life to those god would not help.

-he sold his soul to satan sometime around his mid-30s. [this is a sentence that sounds really fucking weird if u dont know much about tf2.] there are a few reasons behind that, but im only gonna talk about one:

-as i've said, medic spent a lot of time murdering nazis who had tried to go into hiding. that's difficult when theyre trying very, very hard to cover up their past. medic struck a deal with satan- in exchange for the names, aliases, and locations of ex-nazis in hiding, he would kill them and send them straight to hell. his soul was just to sweeten the deal.

-ludwig does a Lot of experiments on captured and dead nazis, especially the painful ones. the ol' "removing a patient's skeleton" story was of a nazi officer medic had caught, and medical licence or not, ludwig would do it again in an instant

-medic's flock of homing pigeons, stolen from a wedding van, are like family to him. the original, stolen generation had more pretentious names, as named by their previous owner- mostly well known scientists and philosophers[Archimedes, Newton, Nietzsche, etc]. most of the pigeons he named himself have biblical, jewish names [Mordecai, Elijah, Rebecca, etc]

-ludwig is absolutely never prim, proper, or orderly. if he is wearing a coat that DOESNT have blood and bird shit on it, wait 5 minutes and check again

-he has a tendency to hyperfocus on something and forget things like "humans need food and water to live". heavy usually helps him remember

-medic snores. loudly. and it sounds fucking awful. heavy is, sadly, a very light sleeper. it takes a loooong time for him to finally be able to sleep through medic's snoring, and it winds up being one of the only things he actually CAN sleep through. god help you if you step on a creaky board halfway down the hall, though, because heavy will wake up in an Instant

-if tf2 were in modern times, ludwig's music taste would include a Lot of kesha, klezmer music, black metal, and so on. its varied, is what im saying

-medic, pyro, and soldier all get along surprisingly well together, because they all have a case of "same brain? same brain!", all of them have issues dealing with other people and have problems with processing/understanding things, have trouble w/ psychotic episodes and the like, overall their minds are all wired oddly but somehow they can understand /each other/

-scout accidentally becomes medic's unofficial adopted daughter and thats a whole post and a half on its own. suffice to say medic would do anything for her

-engie, demo, and medic are all Science Gays

-medic also does his best to help demo with his Absolutely Massive Amounts of Trauma and Self Loathing, by at least being a supportive shoulder to lean on when demo tries to drink himself unconscious to forget it all. hes absolutely terrible most of the time at actually saying anything to help, but he can be a good presence, and he has birds. birds help anything

-he has a very casual fling going with spy, since early on in their time at the base. its usually in a state of "on-again off-again", with the latter usually having something to do with how spy acts with scout.

-obviously theres a lot i could say about heavy and medic's relationship, but to put it briefly- theres a loooong time where both of them are "i dont understand social interaction" gays.

-medic is the "i literally dont understand how to act around people im attracted to or that me being extremely overaffectionate around you is due to the fact that im falling in love with you, i dont catch your vague hints towards the fact that you feel the same about me because you literally need to hit me over the head with something in order to get me to catch onto it" gay

-heavy is the "i have spent so many years repressing so much of myself and keeping quiet and not drawing attention to myself, that i physically cannot bring myself to be up front about the fact that im attracted to you. im also afraid of misintepreting signals and i am instead going to assume your over-affectionate attitude is platonic and i am misreading things" gay

-eventually they figure things out and its good and soft and gay

ok its 3 AM and ive been writing on this for at least an hour and a half and i told Em i would go to bed by now dhgfkhhj 

[trendingnewsb]

Anthony Bourdains #MeToo Advice for Alec Baldwin: Just Shut Up

Just shut up. Thats the advice chef-turned-TV host Anthony Bourdain would like to give to Alec Baldwin, who cant seem to stop weighing in on the #MeToo movement.

The first of Baldwins many boneheaded comments on the subject came during an interview late last year with PBS Newshour wherein the 30 Rock star criticized Rose McGowan for settling with her accused rapist, Harvey Weinstein. Asia Argento, an actress and filmmaker whos also bravely come forward to accuse the powerful movie mogul of sexual assault, took issue with Baldwins callous statement, calling him out on Twitter. The quick-tempered Baldwin responded by laying into an alleged rape victimIf you paint every man w the same brush, youre gonna run out of paint or men @AsiaArgentobefore blocking her.

So Bourdain, who is Argentos partner, fired back with an online jab of his own:

The 61-year-old Bourdain speaks tenderly about Argento, whom he met while filming his CNN show Parts Unknown, explaining how being around a woman of her considerable courage and conviction has caused the former bad-boy chef to reexamine his life. Hes since emerged as a shining example of male allyship.

When someone you care about and respect, you see them struggle to go on the recordthe incredible difficulty of going public about something, and the very real peril at the timeit changes you, Bourdain tells me. When Asia spoke to Ronan [Farrow], I think she might have been the first to go on record knowing with absolute certainty that she would most likely be sued, destroyed, crushed by this gigantic machine that had for decades been crushing far more powerful people than her who dared speak up. But she did it anyway. So to see that, and to see the blowback in Italy where shes received no support, has been eye-opening.

Argento recently addressed the outrageous backlash shes received in Italy since coming forward at the Women in the World Conference in New York. There are lots of predators, but the [victims] see me being called a whore, traitor or prostitute for speaking out so they keep quiet, she told moderator Ronan Farrow, who was recently awarded a Pulitzer for bringing Argentos and other womens allegations against Weinstein to light in The New Yorker.

As importantly, Bourdain continues, the other women that started talking to Asiasometimes in my presenceI started hearing a lot of things and seeing a lot of things that I had been blind to before, and had not heard before. I would love to tell you that I had all along been enlightened, but I was not. It was personal, it was emotional, and it was life-changing. I can only say that Im honored and grateful to learn and be inspired by these women.

In late November, shortly after the sexual-assault allegations against Weinstein came to light, Bourdain cooked a meal for three of Weinsteins accusersArgento, McGowan, and Annabella Sciorramemorializing the occasion on social media:

But Bourdain says hes been very reluctant to discuss the #MeToo movement because, unlike Baldwin, he does not wish to take attention away from the numerous women whove risked their careers in pursuit of justice.

Its something Im very aware of when I hear myself talking about itit makes me very uneasy, he says. These are not my stories, so I feel that every time Im talking about it Im taking up space that should be rightfully taken by a woman. Its a fine line for me. I dont particularly enjoy talking about it. But if you ask me, Ill tell ya.

In addition to Hollywood, the #MeToo movement has had a considerable impact on the male-dominated restaurant industry, where several chefs and restaurants have been embroiled in scandalnone more famous than chef/TV personality/restaurateur Mario Batali, whose apology for sexually-harassing women included a recipe for cinnamon rolls (really).

Ive been out of the industry for a really long time, says Bourdain, but Ill say this: it is not a bad thing that a lot of male chefs are frightened; that a lot of restaurant groups now have to, for reasons of self-interest, take a very hard look at how theyre doing business, how theyre reacting, and their ability to react to complaints of workplace harassment or worse.

I would hope that Mario [Batali] is a cautionary tale, he adds. To see an empire that big come crashing downa figure that respected and that accomplished, to have that status evaporate overnightI would hope that that sends a clear message that no matter who you are and how beloved you think you are, some shit just aint acceptable and youre not going to get away with it.

Bourdains Parts Unknown returns for its 11th season April 29 on CNN. Stay tuned for a longer feature on the showand its outstanding premiere episodeon Monday.

Read more: https://www.thedailybeast.com/anthony-bourdains-metoo-advice-for-alec-baldwin-just-shut-up

from Viral News HQ https://ift.tt/2KsQvWr via Viral News HQ

[briinleyisms]

LMAO HEY MTV IT’S MARCY WELCOME 2 MY CRIB

“LMAO” AKA “ ( x ) ( x ) ( x ) #squadgoals”

ok so lowkey have had this muse for like ten years (ive been rping since i was seven fucking beat me) but every rp i bring her 2??? drops after like??? five days likE LISTEN THAT IS NOT HOW U RUN A RP LISTEN!!! UP!!! PUT UR BACK INTO IT!!!

anyhoW ok unlike ivan since i was still figuring out his bg w rosie when i posted his ‘intro’ i actually got brinley figured out and there’s a long version and a short version. imma put the tl;dr up here ok bc the non-tl;dr is overwhelming. personality is like.... toTALLY POINTLESS WHO CARES ABT PERSONALITY but it’s at the bottom i guess :\

TL;DR:

ok basically she was born into a death cult in aliso viejo, california (tbh i just looked up rural places in ca and chose the most recently established one i could find lmao) called ‘the children of the revelation’ bc im extra. lots of fear-mongering revolving around the idea of The End of Days™. leader was a total prophet and totally abused his prophet power. planned out ritual for end of days was lowkey highkey terrifying (‘let’s go die in the river of miracles’!!!!!! [too extra help me]) and one of the ‘apostles’ was like ‘i quit’ and left iN THE DEAD OF NIGHT!!! and lowkey basically kidnapped a few ppl including BUT NOT LIMITED TO brinley and they wound up in hillsboro and ‘apostle luke’ eventually left and now she’s in the oikos house. fin.

also sik tattooz bro.

ACTUAL VERSION THAT IS LONG(ER):

TW: cult (ofc), death, violence

firST it’s of note that i considered being rly fucking extra by putting quotations around her name bc her birth name is genesis like the book of revelations which brings me 2

my Extra™ title for this cult: “The Children of the Revelation”

so it was like a commune located in some place in CA that’s apparently rural and has only recently been established called ‘aliso viejo’ and lmao watch one of yall live there

but yeAH OK commune not just a church like the church of scientology like full on “u chose this life time 2 prove ur dedication”

alright so just full disclosure that i really really want to get this right and i know no one who has ever been in a cult (let alone a death cult) and i myself have not (as is likely expected) so i have already done research but i plan on doing like 100x more since this is a really serious subject. serious to the point that i’m not even using text slang (although i will when i get on with the intro post i just gotta).

anyhoW w that info out of the way time 2 get 2 the actual like point of the cult

first of all her mom joined the cult before she was born (ofc) and she was the gift!!! between her mom and one of the leader’s ‘apostles’!!!

so!!! 

basically: “lmao ur not leviticus enough 4 us.” (probs their slogan)

ok but obviously that’s scratching the surface like the real fuckery lied w/in two thing:

literal death cult (will get to that)

also doomsday cult

which sometimes go hand-in-hand anyhow

ok so the doomsday thing is what was more prominent in her life since she was 16 when she #escaped and never rly disobeyed (so many things 2 get 2!!!)

the leader’s name was ezekiel (cheever this is actually salem circa 1690) and he perceived himself as a prophet and naturally.... had prophecies. one of the most prominent ones was that the rapture would occur at 11:59PM on December 24th, 2011 (take away four days and add a year and u got the end of the world according 2 misconceptions abt the mayan calendar!)

the idea was that if u obeyed what ezekiel told u 2 do (he believed he was the fourth reincarnation of christ) u would end up going 2 heaven on judgment day but if u disobeyed...... yikes.

it depended on the magnitude of the ‘crime’ but for the most part if u disobeyed more than two times u were killed. u were hung or drowned and u were made an example of.

if u disobeyed less than two times and ur ‘offense’ wasnt worthy of immediate death dw!!! u can scrape by w torture!!! and also be made an example of!!!

so basically u were at ezekiel’s beck and call. every little bit of labor he asked u 2 do was like.......... if u didnt do it yiKES!!! ofc children werent expected 2 perform any laborious tasks rather just 2 listen and take in everything ezekiel and his apostles told them.

his ‘apostles’ who (as u can infer) served as his right-hand men were the fathers 2 all the children who would be born inside the cult. they kept ppl in line. they taught the kids when ezekiel was busy. those sorta things u kno???

ok so imma skip over some of the details that are like.... worse??? like theyre all bad but like these are the things i j feel like shouldnt be brought up in an intro post but theyre in the hella long rough-draft bio here that i went ahead and put up for this purpose rly

SO THAT BEING SAID THIS WAS SORTA A WAY 2 SHOW THE SORTA ENVIRONMENT SHE WAS RAISED IN AND IT SOUNDS FUN AND I WOULD LOVE 2 BE A PART OF IT.

so ok imma try 2 make this next part go quicker

basically the ‘judgment day’ was closing in and ezekiel’s plans were rly like no thank u ( (TW: SUICIDE) ’hey guys! 2 make sure we get into heaven not only do u have 2 follow all of my commands since im jesus’s fourth reincarnation but we all also have 2 walk into a river with rocks in our pockets at the time the world is supposed 2 scorch with hell’s fire!’ (END TW) fun christmas activities for u and ur bae.

as it started closing in it was basically all ezekiel talked abt during his ‘sermons’ like wtf??? what a church service.

‘apostle luke’ (i hate myself) was like “ok..... ok the more u talk abt this the less believable it sounds..... like wtf jesus’s fourth reincarnation??? pics or it didnt happen.” and after some months he wound up concocting this plan 2 #escape bc honestly??? 

so he eventually eSCAPED in the deAD OF NIGHT and basically kidnapped ppl like ok sure luke

one of said ppl was brinley which i kno is unexpected. (honestly i think this is like??? maybe the third time i brought her up in all of these bullets??? honestly @me

“wAS NOT WILLING 2 GO!!! WAS NOT HAPPY 2 GO!!! WAS NOT READY 2 GO!!! NEEDS SOMEONE 2 FOLLOW!!! DOES NOT KNO WHAT 2 DO!!! DOES NOT APPRECIATE THIS!!! IS SHOOK!!!” - everyone luke fucking kidnapped then basically had 2 serve as a stand-in ezekiel for

they ended up in hillsboro after like 84 years and he was like “OK EVERYONE GETS NEW NAMES!!! :D” and tbh he probs just pulled out one of those baby books pointed 2 a random name and bam!!! that was their name

so even tho i’ve been calling her brinley this whole time just 2 make it??? not confusing??? genesis became brinley and she was no longer a book of revelations she is apparently a name that’s most prominent in utah

over time ppl pce’d out (not rly bc they wanted 2 but bc they needed 2 like u get what i mean.)

it ended up j being three ppl in their shitty apt!!! one luke one brinley and one kid who has a name but 1) i havent mentioned it yet and 2) i dont want 2 go look for it in the bio tbh

doomsday came and brinley was shook!!! rly rly shook!!! trying 2 find out what 2 do that would be similar enough 2 what thE CHILDREN of the corn would do!!! and luke was like ( x )

a lot more climatic than im acting like it was but this is so long i dont want 2 spend too much time on anything anymore but ok minor point is homemade inkin’ machine (legit mainly bc ryan ashley -dave navarro voice- [has/had] what it takes... to be ink master. -end voice-)

ok luke left eventually and idk so did the kid idk that’s in there and at first she was like “lmao idk what 2 do ig imma squat [man ivan and brinley #parallels] and keep doin what im doin” and she did and ok

aFTER ALL OF THIS OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST WRITE she wound up w the oikos (bc honestly u can only squat for so long and who the fuck would be like “yes! i would like 2 be inked by a kid on the street who doesnt rly have anywhere 2 put anything! yes!” [i would be like that #exposed]) and is now somewhere where ppl dont think the world will end soon wtf

personality but who cares abt that:

WOW THAT WAS LONG

ok!!! so i never rly had a clear definition of her personality i just like... waited 2 see (BEFORE THE RP CLOSED FUCK THAT) but then i watched a long-ass chipotle commercial (theres this one part where a cow is basically abt 2 be slaughtered and idk it’s so sad it was rly playin up that pathos i wanted 2 cry) and i was suddenly like!!! a lightbulb!!! “aha!!! basically fiona apple’s cover of ‘pure imagination’”

SO 2 GET ON W THAT

it’s been five years since she escaped and started desocializing from that lyf she knew but like............ five years compared 2 sixteen i mean which one’s gonna weigh the other out tbh (i just typed ‘way’ i cannot believe myself pls send me back 2 first grade)

so ok literally LITERALLY it is this song like im tryna think of how 2 explain it???

like the lyrics of it are (u kno willy wonka) v bright (albeit a bit ??? during that spin part) but the bg in fiona apple’s cover is so??? dark??? and honestly fiona apple’s voice just makes everything seem darker (i love fiona apple shes such a queen)

so it’s a v contradicting song

and she has a v contradicting personality

like ok one big thing that fits this contradiction is she feels like she needs someone 2 follow??? since that’s how it’s been almost all of her life??? (come 2 think of it i wouldnt be surprised w my subconscious if that’s the reason she’s still in the oikos house [asides from jobless but]) but at the same time like??? she WANTS 2 be independent??? she WANTS 2 be able 2 build a life for herself and around herself and not someone else but??? it just doesnt work that way???

MORE CONTRADICTION!!! bc of that whole ‘death/doomsday cult’ thing she is a p paranoid person??? but??? at the same time??? c h i l l ??? i mean in any case shes always gonna be lowkey paranoid but she doesnt??? rly act that way most of the time??? this could also be filed under “very curious about the norms of this brand new society but also very wary and prefers 2 Not™”

MORE!!! lmao ok religion idek what 2 do here honestly it’s so fucked. she knoWS IT’S SO FUCKED IT’S SO FUCKKING FUCKED but 16/21 years like??? v hard 2 get over that??? buT IT’S SO FUCKED. like no hate no discriminate (speaking of no discriminate highkey bi i love wlw) but also “everyone is a sinner and so am i we are living in sin we are going 2 burn it is only a matter of time satan where u @???” so like??? scared and wary??? but also??? fucked.

A LOT OF FUCKING FUCKERY. 

A FIONA APPLE SONG.

THANK U AND GOODNIGHT

if u would like 2 plot pls do feel free 2 like this or hmu

and if u actually READ that all then holy shit ur a saint u would make it 2 heaven on rapture day