#but dependent on if they like that ruling power or feel like they are part of that ruling and powerful caste

[mantis-lizbian]

...this doesn't seem like quite an accurate characterization of gestalt, from my experience, that pretty much until you mentioned 4e's hybrid rules, i wasn't even entirely sure you were talking about the same ruleset i was thinking of... Unearthed Arcana page 72, yeah?

so, i actually wound up becoming a massive fan of gestalt in the latter days of 3.5e, before i wound up switching over to PF. yes, characters are more powerful, but - unless you really try to minmax - not crazily so. like, yeah, you can do barbarian/rogue to get both rage and sneak attack, but the only thing that's really going to break stuff is if you double up on full casters, so ban that and 3.5e gestalt characters are, for the most part, maybe 1 to 3 levels more powerful than a non-gestalt PF character of the same level? depending on level and combination. of course, more powerful characters is the point of gestalt, so it makes sense that they'd be stronger.

more pressingly, what really confuses me is the way it's suggested that this causes constructing gestalt characters to be markedly more complex than standard. rather than disassembling classes to component parts, it's more like taking two decks of cards and riffle-shuffling them together. a couple of things - the lower BAB, base saves, and HD of the pair - get thrown out, but for the most part, everything else is kept, and in the same order. i wouldn't (unfortunately from experience) present it to a group of new players, but if you've been mucking about with 3.P for a few years and have at least a half-decent idea of the basic gist of each class, it can be a fun way to spice things up.

however, what i really have to point out is how beautifully it marries with E6 and its variants. the lower level cap means that you don't have as much room for multiclassing, so if you want a character who can do more than one thing, gestalt is a good way to inject that flexibility back in. of course, it does make the characters a little more powerful, but with the cap being before classes (especially spellcasters) really pop off into outright superheroics and demigodhood, you wind up with characters who just feel a bit more in the vein of pulpy heroic fantasy that hits a decent middle ground between the relative "grittiness" of standard E6 and the sheer antics of mid- to high-level standard D&D.

if do ever go back to running a 3.5e game for whatever reason, you can practically guarantee it'll be E6 (or E8) gestalt.

Have you written anything about gestalt rules in D&D 3.P? Is that a topic you have thoughts about?

Not yet, but it is on the list.

The gestalt rules are novel because they're the kind of mechanical option you only come up with if you are well and truly cooked in the brain about the game. For those unfamiliar, gestalt rules involved taking core classes, stripping them into formulaic pieces, then letting you put them together piece by piece, in a way that ostensibly made character building easier (no more foraging a dozen splatbooks to find the right synthesis of class/prestige class/feats), but in the process just catastrophically exploded thoes options and therefore the potential power you could have.

As a 3.5 minmaxer I never touched them not because they were bad but because they struck me as so obviously powerful that any DM allowing them would be doing so on the basic idea of 'let's all have a goofy time' and therefore I would be speaking to an entirely hyperspecialised audience.

I should revisit the topic, though, and Hybrid 4e rules, which are closer to what Gestalt aimed to be.

[luckthebard]

Ashton’s wholehearted and uncritical faith that the primordial titans deserve power and no one else does is. Well it sure is something.

[fusulyesheep]

sometimes I remember there are gay people that do not dress like clowns and get so confused

[ohnoitstbskyen]

... y'all know Lae'zel is acting scared, right?

Video transcription: I've seen a lot of comments on my short about Lae'zel dismissing her entire character because she's mean and… I'm just checking in here… you guys know she's scared, right? She's terrified. She was kidnapped by the worst monster she knows, infected with the most horrifying death anyone in her culture can have, and then stranded on a hostile world, alone, with nothing to guide her except the dogmatic military cult indoctrination of a cruel lich demigod, telling her that her only hope of salvation is to follow Gith doctrine with total unyielding faith. And still she tries to save you. When she keeps insisting that you must get to the Githyanki crèche, it's our only hope, she's trying to guide you towards the only salvation she knows from the parasite, so she can share it with you. And Gith... aren't supposed to do that, saving an outsider is not part of the doctrine, she's breaking the rules trying to do right by you. None of that means she's not being an asshole, she's rude, dogmatic and unpleasant. But everything she does comes from a genuine, very misguided and abrasive, desire to do the right thing. It doesn't make her behaviour okay, but there is more to her character than just "being the mean one."

To expand on this a bit more than I can in a 60 second short, people acting from fear and from their damage is a major theme among the Baldur's Gate 3 companions.

Lae'zel is terrified and falling back on the only thing she believes will give her back some control over her situation, which is the dogma of the military cult she's in. Shadowheart is much the same, amnesiac and grasping on to the only solid thing she knows, which is her faith, which preaches deception, loss and duplicity as the only certain factors in life.

Gale is an inveterate people-pleaser desperately dependent on other people to help him feed his magic addiction, with his overtly affable exterior hiding a rolling boulder of guilt, ambition, greed, arrogance and legitimate hurt. Asterion is... well, no way to really lay out his deal without spoiling, but the boy has been through it and his self-destructive, hedonistic and selfish impulses are all coping mechanism and self-defense all the time.

None of that make their shitty behaviours okay, but in a fictional story, those kinds of flaws and toxic behaviours are what make for interesting stories and characters. I don't blame anyone for finding Lae'zel unpleasant and abrasive, but I do get a bit Old Man Yells At Cloud about people who casually brag about shoving her off a cliff-side, or murdering her because "she was a bitch" or whatever.

Like... being unable to face discomfort in your media is not a virtue, and lashing out reactively against fiction that doesn't validate your power fantasy isn't a flex.

Of course, I saw a lot of those reactions in YouTube comments and on social media, so my sample is biased by those algorithms, but still. A lot of people seem aggressively proud that they never engaged with her story because the terrified indoctrinated child-soldier wasn't immediately nice to them and I can't explain it but something about that reaction feels puritan to me.

[cod-dump]

6’0 or above = tall. 6’0 or below = short (Ghost’s rules)

Rudy, 5’9: is short, acts tall without thinking (he’s just chill like that). Has intimidated people taller than him by a single look (Alejandro is the only person not affected by it)

Alejandro, 6’2: is tall, acts tall without thinking (will not abuse his power). “Short people are people too”. Acts like Rudy is taller than him (would die if he actually was)

Roach, 5’8: is short, acts short, watch your shins (and your heels). Would rather do parkour than ask someone for help to get something off the top shelf (has ripped cabinet doors off the hinges)

Ghost, 6’4: is tall, acts tall naturally (will use his tallness against all those below 6’0). Will make short jokes when he feels the need (has gotten bitten by Roach over this)

Price, 6’2 1/2: is tall, acts tall (mostly as an intimidation tactic), switches off the tall act when not on a mission or working (will not abuse his power)

Gaz, 5’11: One inch too short to be tall (according to Ghost). Acts both short and tall (depends on the day/situation). Best of both worlds. Has never abused his power and never will (if Soap was significantly shorter than him he would)

Soap, 5’10: is short (according to Gaz because of Ghost’s bullshit), acts short and tall given the day or situation. Would 100% abuse his power if he was tall

König, 6’10: is tall, acts short without thinking (is used trying to seem smaller than what he actually is). Never has abused his tallness (but he will if he feels the need). Made one short joke (instant regret because it was targeted at Rudy (he survived))

Horangi, 6'2: is tall, acts tall (a conscious decision 80% of the time). Has abused his power but only on people who deserve it (Graves). Makes tall jokes (99.9% are targeted at König)

Farah, 5’3: is short, acts tall when working (naturally). Is not above asking for assistance but will climb the shelves at the grocery store. Very good at climbing (has broken zero cabinet doors)

Alex, 6’1: is tall, acts tall (naturally). Overly eager to help shorter people get things (has been attacked by a feral Roach). Hasn’t abused his power and never will (he’s a good man)

Laswell, 5’8: is short, acts tall (intentional intimidation tactic). Unfazed by short jokes, will ask for assistance, part monkey (is the only person spared by Ghost’s abuse)

Graves, 5’9: is short, actively acts tall whenever he can (insecure). Will get mad at short jokes but plays it off with a smile but you know he’s mad (sensitive)

Nik, 6’3 1/2: is tall, acts tall (chill). “Short people are people too (except Graves)”. Targets Graves (affectionate). Uses short jokes only on tall people (psychological damage + intimidation tactic)

Valeria, 5’6: is short, acts tall (intentional). Makes tall jokes at short people and short jokes at tall people (psychological damage). Will climb for things (and will stab if someone offers help)

[theresattrpgforthat]

How To Find Cool Games: On Itch.io!

As I drift into a reduced posting schedule, I figured I’d give everyone a peek behind the screen for how I cultivate ttrpgs for recommendations! Some of these tips might even help you find your next favourite game.

This is a long read so let's put most of this beast under a read-more. Keep in mind that many of these strategies work best when you're checking itch.io a little bit every week, and when you're engaging with the platform as more than just a store page. There's a lot of features that you can choose to engage with if you want to find the game for you!

browsing physical game recent releases. This helps me see what’s new and happening, and it helps with a number of things. First of all, I get to see new games pretty much every time I browse recent releases. Secondly, I get a good sense of what’s currently popular in the design space. Thanks to my weekly browsing, I recognize Cy_Borg, Shadowdark and Mausritter as games whose content shows up rather regularly - if you see a lot of products attached to one game at once, that’s a good sign that there’s a related game jam going on (in this case, Shadowdark), or that a game is really resonating with its player base.

sorting games into collections. I personally organize by genre, system, player configuration and (in Games That Intrigue Me) games that I’m personally really hyped about. This works for me because of the nature of my work, but a few collections sorted according to level of interest or game style might work better for you.

Depending on the need, I might have a collection that works specifically for the request - Neon Lights & Cyber Nights is perfect for cyberpunk games, but I might also reference this folder for combat, inventory mechanics, resistance themes, or interesting tech rules. LUMEN is great for folks who want fast-paced games, folks who are looking for certain kinds of video games, or folks who want to feel powerful. If you follow other people on Itch, you'll probably also be able to see their collections, which is a great place to browse.

searching game tags. I don’t typically use the regular search feature, although recently the website did update the toggles to restrict your results to physical games, video games, etc. Instead what I usually do is type what I’m looking for into the url: so in this case, [deck-building]. I might use a couple different wordings, such as [deck-builder] and [deckbuilding] (no spaces). You’re not going to find everything that includes the thing you’re looking for, but you’ll definitely find places to start.

Game Jams! I find these either by looking at the “Jams” tab (although you'll have to wade through video games here) or by noticing that a number of games being published recently have the “for the _” jam in the description. Alternatively, I might be reading the page for a game and see the little “Submission” badge in interaction buttons. There’s game jams for specific systems, game jams for various themes, game jams with special restrictions, and game jams that are titled things like “finish your damn game jam.”

Bundles. I typically buy big-ass bundles and then sort through the games in my downtime. These games are sorted into collections for future reference, and if a game really pops out - into the Intrigue Me folder it goes! And the best part is that I already own it, so if I want to learn more, I can just download it and start reading.

following game designers that I like. This way I’ll get notifications if they release a new game, update an old game, rate someone else’s game, or sort games into their own collections. I also get to see what other folks in the space are excited about - on the day I was browsing, Plasmodics by Will Jobst was really hot.

If you follow me on Itch, you’ll get a notification every time I add a game to one of my non-private folders! Also - you can interact with designers on Itch by liking their updates, and even commenting on their posts, which is a great way to get involved in the design community - and also just make a designer’s day!

[marsupials-of-mars]

Was thinking about @ckret2 's bill when i wrote this, but it applies to bill more generally. I think the main thing people pick up on, maybe subconsciously, about their bill that makes him feel so accurate is that he feels.

A lot of people (and most people are guilty of this including me whether they mean to or not) tend to write him as a tragic immortal? In the sense that he's been beaten down by time and learned never to care about people, and has lost the ability to care.

And the first part of that is true!

He HAS learned never to care about people! In the tbob love page, he says its stupid to tie yourself to a mortal in a way where your happiness depends on them. He's LEARNED this. But he has NOT lost the ability to care. And he DOES care despite knowing he shouldn't.

He interacts with people genuinely, he legitimately enjoys the company of "lesser" mortal species, he has fun, he thinks about people when they're gone, he's taken lovers, he speaks in phrases hes picked up from past earth decades because he likes how they sound (ya dig?).

And some people are frustrated when he's written suave and unfeeling for this reason, because he is a goofball. But the thing is, he DOES act, in a way, suave and unfeeling when it comes to situations like Ford and Dipper. He plays up his "immortal deity" persona, constantly reminding them of all the knowledge he knows, PROVING his value to them.

But he gets mad! He falls in love! He jokes around because its fun! He gets stupid and reckless when he's upset! He burns bridges when he doesnt get his way! These are all insANELY short-sighted things for a trillion-year-old to care about!

This is why he can relate to people, and why he acts like a kid sometimes. I firmly believe that he stopped aging the day he destroyed his dimension (which is basically canon i think) not only physically but mentally. He legitimately cannot mature, cannot gain wisdom no matter how much he tries.

He has a lot of INTELLIGENCE and KNOWLEGE, but its like giving a child the library of alexandria and infinite time to explore. Sure theyll probably learn some things out of boredom or curiosity, but theres no curriculum. They COULD read it all, but why would they? That's boring and dumb and they want to climb the shelves and make book forts instead.

Now, more specifically about ckret2's Goldie:

He describes himself as a consumate extrovert. He hangs out with mabel and watches tv and goes to the Rainbow club. And while he does these things, he isnt thinking "this is so below me, why should i care about any of this?" He's just trying to have fun, and is knowingly fulfilling his social needs. He believes he and ford WERE friends.

And the most important part of this that im always thinking about is Bill claiming that being friends, enjoying peoples company, loving, playing, and all that is not mutually exclusive with being an all powerful god of destruction to be worshipped by all.

Which makes sense! Because he is INTELLIGENT and he knows that he's more powerful than these people, and he SHOULD be a being that demands their worship, and he needs to find something that lasts, and makes sense in the wake of INFINITY. But he also has the mind of a mortal, and he thinks the same way he always has. And with both of these insights, the ONLY thing that MAKES SENSE is to have his cake and eat it too. Focus on the big picture while also enjoying the present, SIMULTANEOUSLY.

Manipulating ford to his own end that leads him closer to his forever plan, while also bringing him to karaoke and falling in love. Securing his rule and reputation over the nightmare realm, being feared throughout the multiverse, having his fingers in as many pies as possible-- while partying with his henchmaniacs, drinking out of solo cups and flashing the cops.

Its the only thing that stops him from going crazy. If you have a mortal mind thats built to love and lose and feel and party and wisecrack, and you relinguish it to the horrifying prospect of timelessness, if you're always looking at the existential...you are not going to last a trillion years.

[makeitmingi]

Let Me In

Genre: Romance, Angst, Fantasy

Pairing: Seonghwa x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Normal!Reader, Vampire!Seonghwa

Summary: He's the second in command of the most powerful, feared coven. But he hides a secret, a human that made his dead heart feel love. For the rest of her life, he promises to protect her from harm, never wanting her to face the consequences of being his lover. Until one day, his hand is forced.

Word count: 8.3K

[Story warning(s): Reader questions herself and her life, descriptions of violence, gore, blood shed, all things vampire. ATEEZ coven members have horrible pasts, experiences with humans and with each other. Please read at your own discretion.]

The moment you entered your bedroom, you let out a tired sigh and leaned against the closed door, your tired body slumping down slightly. The weight of the day was starting to sink into your bones and the aches in your joints were screaming at you.

Today, after a long day at university, you took a double shift at your work place because you knew the later shifts got paid slightly more for closing up the store.

"Never again." You told yourself. Looking at the clock by your desk, you straightened up and went to your window sill.

Pulling back the curtains, you pushed open the windows. You shivered, it was a chilly cloudy night, the moon barely visible.

"I need a shower." You walked to the drawers to pull out some comfy clothes. Although you just wanted to rest, a part of you knew that a warm shower will help relieve some ache in your muscles.

'Maybe I should just quit now.' You thought, leaning against the tiles. You were working so hard to put yourself through university, for what?

"Argh!" You let out a small shout of frustration. Closing your eyes, you grounded yourself and took a deep breath before exiting the shower and getting changed. You tried to towel dry your hair as you shuffled into your bedroom again to do your night time routine.

"Are you okay? Why did you shout? I thought something happened to you in the shower."

"It's nothing..." You mumbled, putting moisturiser on your arms and legs. Once you were done, you gathered your dirty clothes in your arms to do laundry.

"Sorry, I forgot. Come in, Hwa." You said before walking out into the hallway. You heard the heels of his shoes lightly knock on the floor.

"My love, what's wrong?" The male, having removed his shoes, walked over to where you were.

"Nothing. I'm just tired." You shook your head as you poured soap into the washing machine and started a cycle. When you straightened up, you saw the worried frown on his face.

"I'm fine, Hwa. Really." You placed a hand on his arm. His cold hand came up to cup your cheek, making you shiver slightly.

"Look at me." He said. You looked up, meeting his eyes. His own dark orbs searched yours, seemingly trying to find out if you were telling the truth or not. You felt him wrap an arm around you to pull you to his body. His body was cold but sturdy, letting you rest your entire weight on him.

"My love..." He stroked the back of your head to soothe you while your forehead rested against his chest. You closed your eyes for a second, savouring his familiar scent and how much it comforted you.

Seonghwa came to your window ledge every night, waiting for you to let him in. After all, that's the rule of vampires. He couldn't come in unless you let him.

"Let's get you to bed, hmm?" The moment he felt you nod against him, you were in his arms as he carried you to bed.

"Rest, my love. You must be tired." He whispered, keeping you protectively in his hold.

Never in his life time did Seonghwa think that he would be here, holding a human like his life depended on it. But when he met you, something blossomed in him, he's never felt it before.

All he wanted to do was to have you, protects you and love you. Was it really love? Seonghwa wouldn't know, he's never experienced it.

It took him a long time to convince you that he seriously loves you and wouldn't hurt you ever, never in a million years. He gave you space, showed you kindness, patience and support. Along the way, he gave you a purpose, even if you knew you would outlive him.

But you were a secret. Seonghwa's coven was the most powerful and he was the second in command. He couldn't be with a human, he knew his enemies would use you against him.

If his coven faced a downfall, it would be his fault. Because he knew, he would give everything up to ensure your safety.

Would his coven hate him? Kick him out? Seonghwa prays that he never finds out.

But just how did you meet?

Seonghwa was being chased by a vampire hunter after saving one of his coven brothers. He wasn't healing well and he thought that was it, the vampire hunter would end his life.

Until you found him. At first, you didn't know he was a vampire so you brought him into your house. When you realised, you nearly ran for the hills but Seonghwa said he was too weak to even hurt you.

"Will drinking my blood help you heal faster?" You winced as you asked, already fearing the repurcussions of your question. Why were you determined to save this vampire? He's probably killed many humans before to take their blood, he probably doesn't deserve to live and you should just let him die.

"Human blood does help my healing abilities." Seonghwa winced in real pain.

"But... How will you know when to stop?" You asked timidly. What if you let him drink from you and he can't stop until he's drained you entirely? You will be responsible for your own death.

"I won't." He admitted. Right, that totally convinced you more.

"Okay, you know what. Just do it." You sighed in defeat. Whatever fate has in store for you, you're resigned to it. What did you have to live for anyway?

"Are you sure? You could die." He touched your cheek. Was dying sending him into a delirium? Usually, Seonghwa wouldn't think twice if a delicious smelling human was offering herself up to him.

But a part him was hesitant. Looking at you, he didn't want to hurt you or worse, kill you.

"I already said yes, Mr Vampire. Stop stalling or you're making me doubt my decision. Just do it, okay?" You frowned. What was with this guy? Aren't vampire blood thirsty and would readily jump a human for a taste of their blood?

"Okay, come closer. And my name is Seonghwa." He hissed in pain.

"Right because I totally want to know my killer's name." You sighed, inching yourself closer to him.

"Do you have to drink from my neck though? It feels... a little intimate..." You squirmed. If Seonghwa wasn't in such agony, he would have found you a peculiar little human with your questions.

"It's better." He said. Wrapping an arm around his waist, you helped him sit up properly on the couch.

"Now, turn your body towards me and drape your legs over my lap." He instructed. You did as you were told, steadying yourself with an arm around his shoulders.

You pursed your lips at the close proximity, feeling your face heat up. Gosh, he was definitely good looking. Great, have a big crush on the thing that might kill you. You consoled yourself that at least if you died, the last thing you'll see is a handsome face.

"Please be gentle?" You let out a nervous laugh. You shivered as you felt his breath on your neck when he leaned in.

"Thank you." Was all he said before you felt a little prick on your neck and you were out like a light.

You woke up a day later, surprisingly alive. There was a bandage on your neck, covering the 2 small holes. That cemented the fact that it wasn't a dream and you really had an encounter with a vampire.

But you didn't expect him to appear at your window two nights later. Not to take your blood but to thank you properly.

He accompanied you that night, telling you more about himself, minus the gory backstories and details, and learning more about you.

As your relationship bloomed, Seonghwa told you that will be the first and last time he ever took blood from you. He was serious about never hurting you again.

"What's going on in there?" Seonghwa felt you lightly tap his forehead. He grasped your hand, kissing your fingertips.

"Thinking about you." He chuckled. You scoffed, you knew he was always thinking about how the two of you met. Well, you didn't blame him, you didn't think you would by lying here with a vampire by your side either. And somehow, that vampire would be the only source of happiness in your life.

"Hwa, can I asked you, how have you... lived... for so long?" You asked.

"Well, I don't exactly have a choice, love." He let out another small laugh of amusement. You rolled your eyes, knowing he was just teasing you.

"You know what I mean... At some point, have you wanted to just... give it all up? After all, you've lived through everything." You said.

"Of course, after a few hundred years, humans get a little boring." He shrugged.

"Seonghwa! I'm being serious here." You slapped his chest with a small pout. Seonghwa laughed and wrapped his arms around you, kissing your head.

"Alright, alright. Let's put it this way, love. If I did give it all up, thinking I've already done everything there is to life, I wouldn't have met you." He looked into your eyes, tucking your hair behind your ear.

"I wouldn't know what love is, what love feels like. I wouldn't know what it's like to love and protect something so much to the point where you'd willing give up everything for." He said softly, bringing you close to press his lips against yours.

"I love you, Hwa." You hugged him.

"I love you too. So, don't give up just yet." He said, resting his cheek against the crown of your head.

"It's tiring. What am I even working so hard for? I work to put myself through university to get a degree, just to go out and work again." You sighed.

"If you'd just let me help, you wouldn't have to work. Could just focus on university." He pointed out. You lifted your head to glare at him.

"Okay, I know. Bad idea, stupid Hwa. I'll shut up now." He said just as you opened your mouth to scold him.

It wasn't a secret that Seonghwa, as a result of his coven, is loaded. Typical, right? He has always offered to support you financially or just loan you the money but you've always declined it.

"You know that I'll never take your money, even if it's just a loan. If I want to do something, it's gotta come from me. I don't take handouts." You chewed on your bottom lip. Seonghwa looked at you fondly, you were such a resilient human. But he hated how you tire yourself out and work yourself to the bone.

"Love, it's not handout. I'm your boyfriend. Not some sponsor or loan shark. I just want to help you, see you less stressed or burnt out." He said.

"I'll be fine. It's just one of those moments... I'll get over it soon." You groaned.

"You're not alone, alright? I'm here now." He said. Sometimes, it hurt to think that Seonghwa will out live you. He says that he'll be with you forever but what about when you're old and frail?

"Thanks, Hwa. I'm glad I have you." You gave him a peck.

You grew up with your grandmother, never knowing what happened to your birth parents. After your grandmother died, you were left alone to fend for yourself.

You spent your entire life just going with the flow. It was mundane but you never really sought to venture out of your ordinary routine, until you met Seonghwa. Now, your routine is still the same with school and work but Seonghwa visits every night.

"Seonghwa, are you sure you can visit every night? Isn't night time when vampires are the most active?" You asked.

"That's tradition but no. As long as I do my tasks, the coven doesn't really question me." Seonghwa replied. Or rather, they wouldn't dare question the second in command.

"You never told me what your special power is." You said.

"What special power? Where are all these questions coming from?" He chuckled.

"On my way home, I passed by the bookstore and saw someone buying a copy of 'Twilight'." You said. Seonghwa let out a loud groan of annoyance while you snickered, he hates that book.

"In the story, they all have an individual power, besides the speed, super strength and healing abilities." You reasoned.

"I've told you countless times, that book is trash. It's so fictional. Vampires may prefer to work at night because it's less exhausting but I don't sparkle like a diamond when I'm in sunlight." Seonghwa rolled his eyes. You remember how he threw away your entire box collection when he saw it.

"Your hate of the Twilight saga aside. Back to the point, do you have a special power? And what is it?" You asked, an excited twinkle in your eye. Seonghwa cast you a flat look.

"It's late. Can you go to sleep? I'll tell you another time, alright?" He rolled his eyes.

"Come on." You whined.

"Love, you have to wake up for class tomorrow." Seonghwa argued. You pouted but sighed in defeat, giving him a dirty look before laying down to go to sleep.

Seonghwa didn't sleep but he still liked to stay with you for as long as he could.

Your question scared him a little. He didn't want you to know that his leader made him the second in command because of how strong his powers are.

When you woke up the next day, you were alone in bed. Seonghwa never stayed the whole night, you were fine with it. Exiting your bathroom, you found the clothes that you put in the wash last night were hung out to dry.

"Thanks, Hwa." You smiled softly and went to wash up to get ready for the day.

"Don't give up just yet."

His words from last night were fresh in your head. Seonghwa has lived for so long and hasn't given up, your years were measly compared to his. Who were you to give up?

"Let's do this." Slinging your book bag over your shoulder, you headed out the door to go to your university.

-

"Hyung? What are you doing out there?" Wooyoung asked from the confines of the house.

"Just thinking..." Seonghwa sighed. Unlike Wooyoung, Seonghwa has been a vampire a lot longer and has grown accustomed to being in the sun for longer periods of time without feeling the exhaustion or sensitivity. Opening his eyes, he turned around and headed into the house, closing the door behind him.

"What's up, Wooyoung?" Seonghwa questioned.

"Hongjoong hyung is looking for you." Wooyoung informed. Seonghwa nodded and headed down to the basement of the house. He knocked on the double doors before entering.

"Hongjoong, you were looking for me?" Seonghwa greeted the coven leader with a bow.

"Yunho said there are more trespassers coming into our area. I think we should increase the patrol with the smaller covens." He said.

"I agree. When you say trespassers, new vampires? Or-"

"Hunters. Some of them don't really trust the peace treaty we have with the humans. They haven't done anything but I don't want them coming too close." Hongjoong sighed, rubbing his temples.

"I understand, I'll let the other covens know." Seonghwa bowed his head.

Although Seonghwa and Hongjoong have known each other and been best friends for hundreds of years, Seonghwa still threaded lightly when it came to treating Hongjoong like a friend more than a leader. To vampires, ranking was important.

"You okay?" Hongjoong tilted his head, genuinely worried.

"Yeah. Just thinking about the hunters. We can protect ourselves, no doubt. But the smaller covens may struggle." Seonghwa lied.

"They'll definitely use the smaller covens to try and get us. But we'll manage. Can you go with San for tonight's stake out? We could use you." Hongjoong asked.

"You know I don't work with the brawn." Seonghwa chuckled, trying to joke with Hongjoong.

"Would you prefer to go with Wooyoung then?" Hongjoong asked, an understanding smile on his face.

Seonghwa knew that Hongjoong really did care for him and his opinion, which he was grateful for. They had supported each other for so long and grew their coven together.

The 8 members were split into 2 groups, the brains and the brawn. Seonghwa and Hongjoong alongside 2 other members; Wooyoung and Yunho, were the brains. The other 4 members were the brawn, utilised more for their brute strength. That's how they worked so well together as a coven.

"Sometimes I wonder, if we'll truly, ever be able to exist peacefully alongside humans." Hongjoong said, going to stand by his window.

"Human's have literature that paint us as the enemy. That's never going to end." Seonghwa shrugged, trying to suppress the smile as he remembered the Twilight conversation with you.

The coven got their blood mainly from blood banks and human suicides now. Last time, it was different.

"I know it doesn't pardon us from what we've done in the past." Hongjoong smiled bitterly.

When vampires were forced to hunt humans a long time ago, it was truly a war. Yes, some members of their coven have hunted before, for survival.

"There are still rogues, Hongjoong. No matter how much we try to stop them and hunt them. New ones pop up." Seonghwa said.

"Mmm, Jongho caught one going after a child two nights ago." Hongjoong sighed. Seonghwa had a grim look on his face. Even when they hunted humans, their coven never went after children.

"I'll go on a stake out with Wooyoung tonight. We'll keep the border clear." Seonghwa said, patting Hongjoong on the shoulder. He knew that Hongjoong had a lot to deal with, a big burden to carry as the leader of such a powerful coven.

"Thanks, Hwa." Hongjoong smiled. Seonghwa bowed his head before leaving the leader's quarters.

Even though their coven tried to maintain the peace with humans, some coven members didn't particularly like humans after their run in with vampire hunters. That's why Seonghwa keeps you a secret.

"Oh, hyung." San smiled when he saw the blonde emerge from the basement.

"Hey, San." Seonghwa's eyes trailed to the scar over the younger's eyebrow. Just one of the scars left by vampire hunters.

"You spoke to Hongjoong hyung?" San blinked.

"Yeah, he updated me on the trespassers and border issues recently. I'll be heading out with Wooyoung tonight to assess and control the situation." Seonghwa informed.

"Okay. I'll see you tonight then." San bowed and went upstairs to his room.

Once Seonghwa was in his own room, he took his phone out to drop you a text, letting you know that he may not come tonight. Even if he did, he'll be late. It did hurt him slightly, Seonghwa didn't want you to think that he put the coven before you. But that's the sacrifice he had to make to keep you a secret.

'Of course, Hwa. I understand, your coven needs you. You shouldn't neglect your duties. Don't worry about me, I'll be okay. I'll just see you tomorrow night <3 - (y/n)'

He didn't expect anything less, of course you were understanding and told him to focus on his coven's needs instead.

'I love you. Rest well. - Hwa'

'I love you too. Stay safe, alright? And thanks for handling my laundry for me this morning. - (y/n)'

Smiling to himself, Seonghwa put his phone aside. Since he doesn't sleep, he always got out of bed before you woke up and helped you do your morning chores like laundry and cleaning.

Just to give you one less thing to do in your already busy day.

He entered his bathroom to shower. After his shower, he stared at himself in the mirror.

The coven mark right under his right eye. You didn't know that it was there, another thing Seonghwa hid from you. But no one questioned it, it was normal for him to hide it when he's amongst humans.

Seonghwa knew you would ask him why he got it in such an obvious spot. But he didn't want to lie to you again, the truth was that Hongjoong held him down and forced him to get it when he was on a rampage a long time ago.

At that time, Hongjoong was a ticking time bomb. Questioning everything when his own brother was murdered by a vampire hunter. He wanted Seonghwa to prove his loyalty this way.

"I'm going out to visit to meet our neighbouring covens." Seonghwa said as he came back downstairs.

"Want us to come with?" Yunho offered, looking up from his cereal bowl.

Vampires don't gain nutritional value from human food but they always had some laying around to snack on for fun. Some ate it to reminisce the taste of when they enjoyed it as humans.

"It's alright, I'd rather walk on my own." Seonghwa pulled his hood up and left the house.

Just as he exited the house, a truck pulled up. It was the group that supplied their coven with blood.

"Boys, our supply is here." Seonghwa announced. Yunho and Jongho were there in a few seconds, helping carry the boxes of blood packs into the house. Seeing that everything was in order, Seonghwa grabbed a blood pack from one of the boxes and left to finish his duties for the day.

As he walked, he used his fang to pierce a corner of the bag to drink it. Nothing compared to the taste of your blood, the best that Seonghwa's ever had in his entire life time.

But as soon as the memory entered his head, he shook it away before the temptation hit. He swore he would never take blood from you again.

When he drank from you, he knew he was a goner. For the first time in a long time, he felt himself lose all self control.

That was, until you grew limp against him. The sinking weight of your head and body on his own jolted him out of his blood trance.

It took so much will power to pull away from you. He was scared that he had killed you but when he felt your weak pulse, he was relieved. He sat there for a while with you in his lap as he healed.

Then he carried you to bed, tended to your wound and left for the night.

No, Seonghwa didn't love you because of the taste of your blood. That was a separate thing and he didn't let that desire for your blood cloud his feelings. That's why Seonghwa promised to never take your blood again, even if you did offer it to him to satiate his hunger.

Tossing the now empty blood pack aside, Seonghwa looked at the sky, seeing the dark clouds roll in. He was suddenly hit with a heavy feeling in his chest.

Hopefully everything will be okay.

-

"There's been another mysterious killing. The bodies of 3 men, armed with weapons, have been found viciously mutilated. Police suspect that this could be due to gang activity..."

You looked at the television that was left on while you and your colleague closed up the shop for the day.

"Did you see this, (y/n)?" She gasped. You looked up at the television of the crime scene. Although they were blurred out, the weapons found on the 3 dead bodies made it clear to you that they were vampire hunters. From the looks of it, the vampire or vampires made it out alive.

Seonghwa always told you that vampire hunters carry silver as they can seriously injure vampires. It was one of the only things those vampire fantasy books were accurate about.

"Are you done? We can lock up." She smiled, turning off the television. You nodded and grabbed your bag.

"Get home safe." You wished.

"You too." She giggled and waved to you before you parted ways. As you headed home, you thought about Seonghwa. You didn't see him last night.

'I saw the news about the 3 bodies. They're vampire hunters, aren't they? Are you safe? - (y/n)'

'You're right, my love. Yes, don't worry. It wasn't us, one of the smaller covens but they managed to get away safely. - Hwa'

'That's good, I hope they're okay. I didn't see you last night so I wanted to make sure you were not one of the ones that were fighting the hunters. - (y/n)'

'My love, you're probably the only human that is worried that the vampires are okay, not the humans. And you may not have seen me but I, for sure, saw you. Of course I have to make sure you're safe in bed, even if I'm not there to accompany you. - Hwa'

'You dropped by? - (y/n)'

'For a bit, just to see if you were asleep and safe. - Hwa'

'You should have knocked or woken me up. I would have let you in. - (y/n)'

'You know I would never do that. I would not risk waking you, no matter how much I miss you. - Hwa'

'Unfortunately, I cannot come tonight. With the vampire hunters' attack, my leader needs me to help scout out our area and visit the attacked covens to make sure they're okay. I'm sorry. - Hwa'

'No need to apologise. This is for your safety and the coven's, which is more important. And the attacked covens need all the help and support they can get, I'd rather sacrifice my time with you than to know they're struggling on their own. I'll be fine, I'm headed home now anyway. - (y/n)'

'You're such a peculiar kind human, love. - Hwa'

'I'm going to ignore the fact that you just called me weird and focus on the 'kind' only. - (y/n)'

'Of course, you are very kind, that's why I love you. I love you so much, my love. - Hwa'

'I love you too, Hwa. Please be careful and take care when you're facing those hunters. If you drop by tonight, please wake me up. I'll let you in. - (y/n)'

When you arrived at home, you went straight to take a shower, not bothering to open your windows since Seonghwa wasn't coming.

"Laundry..." You were standing in your kitchen when you heard an ear piercing scream, making you jump.

"What was that?" Your apartment building was small and old, you stay on the top floor, which was the third floor. The scream sounded like it came from your downstairs neighbour. As much as you wanted to see what happened, something in you told you to stay away.

*BANG*

Then a shot rang out through the building. It was almost deafeaning. Quickly, you went to lock your door and grabbed your phone.

"Love? What's wrong?" Seonghwa already knew something was up. You never call him because that would risk his coven brothers finding out about you. For you to do, something was definitely wrong.

"H-Hwa, there's a shooting in my building... I don't know what's going on... Something is wrong, Hwa..." You panted, feeling the fear creep up in your throat.

"Seonghwa hyung?" Yeosang frowned in confusion.

"Love, speak to me." Seonghwa ignore the younger as he felt a chill wash over him. You were in trouble.

"Hwa, I think they're coming." You whimpered. Seonghwa's mind raced as he tried to figure out what to do. How did the vampire hunters find you?

"Hold on, my love. I'm coming." Seonghwa promised.

"Brothers, I know I have a lot to explain but right now, I need your help. Please." Seonghwa said to his 7 brothers. Hongjoong, at the other end of the meeting table, raised a questioning eyebrow. In the centuries he has known Seonghwa, he has never seen Seonghwa beg so desperately.

*BANG BANG BANG*

There was a pounding on your door. You left your phone on, sliding it under the bed so Seonghwa could hear what was going on. You hid in your room as you heard the main door get busted down.

"Hello?" You heard a gruff voice as a few footsteps entered your house. Your heart was racing.

"There you are." The bedroom door was forced open and you were cornered, facing 5 burly men, armoured and armed.

"W-Who are you?"

"I'm sure you know who we are, sweetheart. Someone in this building is harbouring vampires. And I'm pretty certain that it's you." One of the males smiled at you.

"Vampires? Are you kidding? Vampires aren't real! You busted down my door just for that?" You lied, trying to keep your cool.

"Lying doesn't help your case. If you really don't know what we're talking about, I'm sure your vampire wouldn't mind us sticking around, huh?" The man chuckled. You closed your eyes as you braced yourself for impact.

"A HUMAN?!" San roared, almost stopping in his tracks when he heard Seonghwa tell the group that you're a human.

"Yes, I'm in love with a human. And she needs me right now. I'm the reason she's getting hurt." Seonghwa said as they ran from their home to your house, following Seonghwa's guide.

"Seonghwa-"

"I promise to explain myself later. You can kick me out, banish me, whatever. I just need your help, I need her to be okay. Please, Joong." Seonghwa begged.

"Okay, you owe us that." Hongjoong frowned. He wasn't happy either, feeling betrayal bubble within him.

"Wooyoung, whatever happens. I want you to take her out of there. Make sure she's safe. Please, I trust you." Seonghwa said.

"Alright, hyung. I promise, I'll protect her." Wooyoung agreed, albeit reluctantly. He was here because of Seonghwa. He hated that Seonghwa was reduced to such a state, the one that took him in. But it was what he owed the older, even if this human might be the reason that Seonghwa has to leave the coven.

"Third floor." Seonghwa pointed. Instead of using the window, Seonghwa knew the 8 of them couldn't fit and used the door. Seonghwa stood at the threshold where the door was knocked down.

Seonghwa's eyes turned red as his eyes fell on you, barely conscious, bloodied and bruised, in the hands of the vampire hunter. You were losing consciousness.

"(y/n)!" Seonghwa shouted.

"There you are." The 5 hunters turned to the 8 vampires standing there. You weakly turned your head.

Seonghwa was almost unrecognisable, in a fur hood with a mark beneath his glowing red eyes. You couldn't make the rest out, you guessed they were his coven brothers.

"Love, let me in!" Seonghwa screamed. You looked at how the hunters were aiming their weapons at the 8 vampires. With Seonghwa standing right in front, you didn't want to let him and his brothers in, they could get hurt.

"Love, please! I'm begging you, let me in! PLEASE!" Seonghwa screamed for you, tears falling down his cheeks.

"Let's fight this fair and square." Hongjoong said to the hunters. He exuded so much dominance and power, you automatically knew he was the coven leader.

"Sure. If you can come in." The hunters shrugged and dropped your body to the floor like you were nothing.

"(y/n). If you die now, I'm killing myself right now!" He threatened you.

"Alright... Come in." You breathed painfully. The 8 hooded vampires entered your tiny apartment, bringing their powers with them.

"Seonghwa, don't kill all of them. We need 1 for information." Hongjoong said but Seonghwa couldn't hear anything. All he wanted to do was kill them. But the hunters weren't going to back down.

"Hwa..." You called out but your words came out in a whisper. Your body felt heavy, you couldn't seem to control it.

"Wooyoung, get her out of here." Seonghwa grunted as he dodged a silver bullet. Seonghwa couldn't use his power with you around, he didn't want you to see how he can use his powers on others. You felt yourself get lifted up, meeting the fox-like eyes of one of Seonghwa's coven brothers.

"No... Hwa..." You whimpered.

"Seonghwa hyung will manage. I need to take you to safety. Sleep now." His voice was so calming you slipped into unconsciousness.

"Wake up."

A voice spoke to you, making you open your eyes. You gasped and sat up, finding yourself surrounded by 7 vampires that honestly looked upset with you.

"Human, you've not recovered. But we woke you up because we need you to heal Seonghwa." You remembered his name, Hongjoong, said.

"Don't try anything funny." One of them with an eyebrow scar flashed his fangs at you.

"San, go to your room. You're not needed here." Hongjoong waved the aggressive vampire off, making him storm out of the room. He then turned back to you.

"What happened to Seonghwa?" You asked.

"He was hit bad and we removed the silver but his healing is compromised and slow. He needs fresh blood to heal or he'll die. Considering you're the reason he's in that situation, you should be the one of give him blood." Hongjoong spoke.

"O-Of course." You said. Hongjoong's words cut deep but they held nothing but the truth. You knew his relationship with Seonghwa goes way back, they've known each other forever.

"Mingi, carry her to my room." Hongjoong ordered. A tall male came forward, his face expressionless as he easily lifted you up.

"Hwa!" You nearly leapt out of his arms when you saw the state Seonghwa was in.

"My... love... You're... okay..." Seonghwa smiled weakly as Mingi sat you down in the chair beside Hongjoong's bed. You leaned forward to hold his hand, pressing it against his cheek.

"Thanks to you and your brothers. I'm so sorry, I'm sorry, Hwa." You cried against his hand.

"Silly girl... What's there... to be sorry about...? I told you... I'll always p-protect... you..." He winced. You heard Hongjoong clear his throat from behind you, reminding you why you were here in the first place.

"Hwa, you're dying. Drink from me, it's the only way you'll heal properly." You said.

"No." He didn't even hesitate or wait to answer.

"Hwa, please. You're here because of me. You have to!" You sobbed. Now, it was your turn to beg him. Seonghwa swallowed, resting his hand on your head as you cried. He met Hongjoong's eyes, knowing he must be the one that convinced you to do this, telling you that it was your fault that Seonghwa's dying.

"It's not... your fault..." He said.

"I can't let you die, Hwa. You hear me? You cannot die before me. If you don't drink from me, I'll forcefully make you drink from me." You shouted at him.

"You're also recovering... human bodies are fragile... You can't handle me... taking from you..." He told you.

"I may kill you." He looked into your eyes.

"Hongjoong will stop you before you kill me. You can, right?" You turned to Hongjoong, who shrugged but nodded his head. If that will convince Seonghwa to drink from you, he'll agree.

"Please, hyung! You can leave the coven and be with a human, for all I care, but you cannot die." Wooyoung begged.

Suddenly, you grabbed the dagger from the holster of the person closest to you, pointing it at yourself. All the vampires in the room, including Seonghwa was shocked, unsure of what they should do. Seonghwa stared at you with wide eyes.

"My love... What are you... doing? Don't... be rash..." Seonghwa coughed as he didn't have the strength to stop you now.

"Hwa, you begged me to let you in... You said you'll kill yourself if I die. I'll kill myself too if you die." You threatened, bringing the dagger closer to your neck.

"Fine. Just put the dagger down." Seonghwa frowned.

"All those who won't control yourselves, leave now." Hongjoong ordered. A few of them left the room.

"Yeosang, help her up." Hongjoong instructed. You were lifted up again. The best position without Seonghwa having to move much was for you straddle him and lean down.

"You can hug me... I'm... not that... fragile... It's okay to be afraid... But don't be, my love... It's just me, your Hwa... Hmm?" Seonghwa chuckled, weakly reaching a hand up to stroke your cheek. You wrapped your arms around his neck, your body was now just laid over his. His own arms moved to drape over your lower back.

"I'm sorry." Seonghwa pressed a light kiss to your cheek. You tilted your head away, presenting your neck to him.

When Seonghwa bit down, you squeezed your eyes shut, trying not to let any sounds of pain and discomfort out, anything that'll deter him from drinking.

"I love you..." You forced out before your world faded to black.

-

"My love." Seonghwa entered his room. You have been unconscious, laying in Seonghwa's bed, for a week already.

As he feared, Seonghwa took too much from you and needed Hongjoong and Yeosang to tear him away from you and knock him unconscious so he wouldn't kill you.

But even so, the toll was too much on your already injured body so right now, you needed to rest.

"It's been a week. Are you resting well?" He whispered, kissing the back of your hand. You were always warm compared to how cold he was. He smiled softly, reaching over to make sure your hair was not bothering you.

"Take all the time you need, my love. I'll be here." He kissed your forehead. He ignored the sting he felt, he was the reason you were laying there.

After Seonghwa recovered, they sat down to talk. They didn't want to kick Seonghwa out of the coven but some members were uncertain about having a human coexist with them within the same space.

San, Mingi and Yunho were the ones that avoided Seonghwa for now. The decision was left up to them.

And safe to say, Hongjoong still hasn't spoken directly to Seonghwa too. The only time was to tell Seonghwa that no matter the decision, you and he can stay in the house until you have recovered.

"Hyung. Is she okay?" Jongho came in. He was the one with the contact for a doctor that was a vampire, to come check on you.

"Still the same." Seonghwa sighed, his eyes not leaving you.

"What's your plan, hyung?" Jongho asked as he crossed the room and took a seat by the desk that Seonghwa had in the room. It kept a distance between the two of you.

"I don't have the right to ask any of you to live with a human, knowing what some of you have been through with hunters. So I'll do what's best for the coven. But no matter what, I can't leave her. I cannot continue to exist without her." Seonghwa smiled softly as he looked at your peaceful face.

"But she'll die, hyung. Maybe not now but she's human. At some point, she'll die." Jongho stated.

"Then I'll be by her side when the time comes." He said firmly.

"You really love her?" Jongho sat up.

"I thought I experienced everything there is to life, seen all there is to see. But when I met her, everything I experience with her was so new. So yes, I love her more than life." Seonghwa replied.

"You love her so much that you're willing to leave us?" There it was. The stabbing question.

"Jongho, you know this decision isn't easy. I love all of you, you've been my family for so long, especially Hongjoong. But I can't, I can't leave her. I don't want to have to decide between all of you and her."

Not saying another word, Jongho stood up and left the room. Seonghwa moved to lay beside you, carefully moving your body so that you laid on his shoulder and he cradled your body. He buried his face in your hair.

"I'll take care of you forever, my love. As long as you're with me, everything else doesn't matter." He held you to his body.

With how half the coven avoided him, Seonghwa mostly kept to his room. He guarded you, not that he didn't trust his brothers, but he just felt the need to make sure you were safe.

So when you woke up another week, Seonghwa was there. He nearly cried as he showered you in kisses.

"I thought you left me." He said, his forehead pressed to yours.

"I would never." You giggled. He wrapped his arms around you, hugging you to his chest. When you pulled away, you reached out to touch his cheek, specifically the mark under his eye.

"You've hid this." You said but your voice held no anger. Seonghwa placed his hand on top of yours.

"It happened a long time ago. It's the mark of the coven." He explained with a soft smile. You nodded, rubbing your thumb over it gently. You and Seonghwa shared that moment together in silence, emotionally connecting and healing after everything the two of you have been through together.

"You looked so different when you came to the apartment. When you pulled down your hood and your eyes were glowing red, I've never see them like that before." You said to him.

"I didn't scare you, did I?" He frowned in worry.

"Was I scared? A little. But I knew you would never hurt me." You smiled softly.

"That's right." He kissed your knuckles. Seonghwa seemed to be thinking about something but you didn't point it out, not wanting to pressure him into telling you more.

"Love, I think I should tell you about my power. But I need you to promise me that you won't hide from me. Anything, any doubt, you'll ask me, can you do that?" He spoke gently. You nodded your head.

"The reason I'm second in command... is that I can control and manipulate minds." Seonghwa said.

"What does that mean?" You tilted your head.

"I can control the minds of those around me. I can manipulate them to make them think differently, see differently, act differently without them even knowing. There's no way of stopping me from entering their minds." He revealed.

"So... you can like... make people kill each other...? Take over their minds and control them?"

"Yes, in the worst possible way. I can do anything to them as long as they are within my reach. Humans, especially, are more fragile with their minds so they're easier to manipulate." He explained.

"H-Have you ever..." You didn't even want to ask that, it sounded wrong coming out of your mouth.

"My love, I swear on my life, I have never used my power on you. Not once." Seonghwa shook his head frantically, knowing you would ask.

"Okay, I believe you, Hwa." You nodded with a loving smile.

"But what's going to happen to you, Hwa? Your coven knows about me now. I'm so sorry." That was what you were mainly worried about. Seonghwa lifted you to sit on his lap.

"Hey, nothing for you to apologise for. This is my fault, I'm the reason you were targeted in the first place. I told them to decide if I should stay or go. But no matter what, I'm keeping you with me." He informed.

"Hwa, maybe-"

"I don't even want you to finish that sentence, don't even have such a thought in your head. You should know that I'm never leaving you. If they're fine with me staying, you're staying with me. If they're not comfortable, I'll leave and take you with me." He wrapped his arms around your waist.

*KNOCK KNOCK*

"Seonghwa hyung, we all need to talk... When you're ready... Downstairs... You may bring her." Yeosang's voice sounded on the other side of the door before you heard his retreating footsteps.

"Hey, hey. It's alright. They won't hurt you, hmm? I won't let them." Seonghwa held your cheeks, planting a kiss on your lips.

"Okay." You whispered. Seonghwa helped you out of bed. He slipped his arm under you to help you down.

All 7 heads whipped around to you the moment you stepped out, your scent filling the whole room. You shrunk back slightly but Seonghwa squeezed your hand reassuringly.

Seonghwa pulled a chair out for you to sit by his side. The other 7 coven members sat at the other end of the table.

This was the first time you were face to face with Seonghwa's coven brothers. You gulped, you felt like your heart was pounding in your ears. You squeezed Seonghwa's hand under the table. Everyone stared at you except Hongjoong, who stared at Seonghwa.

"I'm guessing this is to discuss the coven's decision." Seonghwa broke the silence first.

"Hyung, you can't leave. We need you." Yeosang blurted out.

"Yeosang, you know if I stay, she stays with me. I need you all too. But I also need her." Seonghwa said. You grew conflicted, hearing the coven member's words.

You loved Seonghwa more than life but they needed him. Seonghwa can't leave them, eventually you'll die and he'll be alone. If he stayed with them, they'll accompany him for as long as he lived.

"You sure are self sacrifical, human. Not many humans are like you." Hongjoong spoke, having read your mind.

"What?" Seonghwa frowned.

"She'll die and she doesn't want to leave you alone. She wants you to stay with us. She knows and understands the reality, Hwa. Something you don't seem to get!" Hongjoong slammed his palms down on the table, causing you and the other 6 vampires to flinch. But Seonghwa didn't react.

"When I spoke about coexisting with humans, I didn't mean go out and love one. Betray your family. The ones who have been here." Hongjoong glared.

"Hongjoong, you know I didn't do it to intentionally betray you. Any of you." Seonghwa sighed.

"Can't you turn her?" Wooyoung asked.

"No. Not now... Not yet... It's too soon... I-I can't do that to her. It's too much, all of you should know that." Seonghwa looked all of them in the eye. Seonghwa couldn't just turn you, it wasn't fair to you.

"She saved me when I was saving Mingi from the hunters. She's not like the other humans." Seonghwa revealed.

Mingi flinched at the memory, remembering all the lives lost that night and how Seonghwa sacrificed himself so that Mingi could escape the hunters.

"Give her medal of honour then." San said sarcastically.

"San... I know this isn't fair on any of you. Especially after what many of you have been through with hunters. That's why I left the decision on whether I stay with the coven up to you. The only thing that doesn't change is that (y/n)'s with me." Seonghwa still spoke calmly.

"Enough. I've spoken with all the coven members separately. Many of them have... reservations but left the final decision up to me." Hongjoong told Seonghwa.

"Really?" Seonghwa looked at San, Mingi and Yunho.

"It's too big a decision. Hongjoong hyung has been the leader for centuries, we trust his decision. Even if it's not favourable." Yunho said.

For a few seconds, the room fell into silence again as they waited for Hongjoong to speak again. You swear you were going to pass out from this. You felt like time had just stopped.

How would you live with yourself if you were the reason Seonghwa leaves his coven or that it gets broken up?

"Hwa, I-" You were about to pull your hand away from Seonghwa's but he just gripped it tighter. No, he wasn't going to let you go.

"Seonghwa, you've been with me the longest, even before we had this coven. And we've been through a lot together, everything. And yet, I've never seen you more concerned, to the point where you'll beg us, over anything... I'd never expect it to be a over a human." Hongjoong said.

"I know you're loyal, Seonghwa. You've proven it time and time again. I know you wouldn't put us in danger." Hongjoong continued. Seonghwa reached up to touch the coven mark under his eye.

"This will be like a probation period. You and her can both stay. But she'll stay in the guest house, not here." Hongjoong said.

"That's fair." Seonghwa replied. Hongjoong stood up and the other 6 vampires moved to give their leader space. Casting you one last side glance, Hongjoong walked away.

"Come. You should rest more." Seonghwa turned to you.

"I-I..." You stuttered, not sure what to say or how to react. Yunho led San out of there.

"Sleep."

Soon, you fell against Seonghwa's chest. Seonghwa's eyes widened as he turned to Wooyoung, the other mind controller in the group. Although, not as powerful as Seonghwa. Hongjoong wasn't a mind controller but one of his powers let him read minds.

"I'm sorry, hyung. She's been anxious and stressed the entire time. It was deafening." Wooyoung apologised. Surprisingly, with the help of Jongho, Seonghwa was able to move your body to lift you.

"Thank you, Wooyoung. But please don't do that again." Seonghwa brought you up to the room.

"Hyung." Mingi stopped Seonghwa in his tracks.

"You really love her that much?" Mingi asked, the strain in his voice indicated how hard it was for him to ask that. A part of him in denial.

"I do." The older replied and continued his way up the stairs and into his bedroom. Soon, he'll have to prepare to move to the guesthouse behind their main house.

But for now, Seonghwa didn't want to think about what your future would be, what happens after Hongjoong's 'probation period'. He's just content that he still has you and can protect you properly. Hopefully, his coven will soon be more accepting of you, that they'll see how different you are from the other humans.

And you'll be able to be together for the rest of your mortal life.

~

Masterlist

[bbokicidal]

Hello! The dick analysis was so 🤤🤤🤤 and you’ve become my virgin!skz dealer now! 😍😍😍

Speaking of which, what kind of subs would skz be? Could you write some hcs pls?

(Ps: I hope the headache you had has gone away! 🫶)

Have a wonderful day (or night depending on when you’re reading this)! ❤️❤️❤️

I'm about to do some bombass 5-STAR themed makeup but I'll write up some quick head canons, sure!! (Also my migraine has mostly gone away lol, ty for well wishes !!)

Chris :

Softest bottom ever, so compliant and eager to please.

Power... bottom? Maybe? Mm, not the right word. More of; He'll do anything you ask and he miiiight fuck you on his own a little if you're edging him and he knows he can't take it anymore.

So obedient. So so obedient, so sweetheart coded. Just there to make you feel good 'n gets soooo flustered with his ears and neck all red in embarrassment from having all your attention on him. <3

Minho :

Brat !! Brat I say !!!

So bratty, so mean. Cannot keep his mouth shut because he's always whining or biting back about how you're moving too slow or you're not going hard enough with him.

Be mean !! Spit in his mouth to assert dominance. That'll shut his ass up. <3

Changbin :

Pillow Princess Bin <3

The sweetest angel in bed. Less of an eager pleaser than Chris and more just - happy to be there, enjoying the moment, basking in the worship and adoration you shower him in.

Sit on his face and suffocate him. Man likes to eat, 'n that includes your holes. ;)

Hyunjin :

SO loud. So so loud, so whiny. Constantly moaning. Literally produces the PRETTIEST sounds you'll ever hear when he's subbing !!

The type to enjoy nipple clamps and wearing lacy lingerie for you because he knows just how much you like how lean he is <3333 (im tweaking out im just inserting my own fantasies in here now)

Looooves to be edged. Wants you holding a vib to the tip of his pretty pink cock until he's actually spraying cum and shaking so much he can't breathe. Also likes to have his ass ate, I don't make the rules. (I do.)

Jisung :

Bottom. BITCH.

Aka not a sub very often but when he does???? Mmm Mm MMMMM. So so so submissive, enters subspace so fucking fast when he's feeling a bit down. Also a very good communicator about what he wants/needs for the evening!!!

Honestly? I think his favorite thing to do while being submissive is dressing up. He likes wearing the big hoodies, the frilly socks, having his hair pinned back and sitting w his cute lil anime girl legs.

Felix :

Alright I'm gonna say on one hand, I can see him in cute pink clothing with garter belts and stockings and sleeves covering his hands, etc etc etc. Whimpering, hair in bows and pigtails, all cute 'n shit.

Another part of me says he's just so vanilla when hey subs and it's bc he doesn't prefer subbing. He really only subs when you either A) ask him to so you can experiment, or B) he needs you to blow him. :)

Definitely a moaner tho. <3

Seungmin :

An actual dog, bro.

Growls, bites, even spits at you sometimes. A brat, fr! Buuuuut if you put him in his place then he's sooooo compliant and whimpering like the good puppy he is.~

The type to hump your leg if you deny him his needs, biting at your thighs and even eating you out with long licks to get your attention until you flip him over 'n suffocate him by sitting on his face. <3

Jeongin :

I really don't see him as submissive,,,, ever. So I'm gonna say he's really only submissive when he's by himself.

Has definitely used toys before on himself, has taken it up the ass. Did enjoy it but won't admit it aloud bc he's too shy. <3 But !!!

He did let you in on his secret a lil later on, and now if you ask reaaaaaally nicely and have it all planned out, he might let you peg him until he cries. <3 (Face down ass up Innie?? MMMMM)

[hopeastrz]

THE ART OF EYE LANGUAGE: your gaze and eyes based on beauty asteroids in your natal chart.⋆𐙚 ₊ ° 🌪️⊹ ♡

«KINDLY READ THIS IN LIGHT MODE!»

CHECK OUT SEPTEMBER SALE: fixed price on any and all of my readings 17 DOLLARS only.

EXPLANATION: If you want to know how your gaze looks like to people check which beauty asteroids you have in aries, conjunct your sun, moon in a very tight orb, or sit in the 1st house since those mainly rule our eyes.

NOTE: should i make part 2?, wanted to post something quick before i sleep as a thank you for all the love you keep showering me with, enjoy and lots of kisses xoxo.!!

SIRENE (1009) on the rising or in aries may give you upturned feline eyes, very hypnotizing gaze, may make people feel very drowsy or they feel very pulled by you.

PERSEPHONE (399) duality queens, you can be the queen of the underworld or the spring maiden with your eyes, you choose to be what needs to be depending on the situation, if you’re seducing someone you’ll wear your most captivating gaze, and if you feel extra sweet you can make flowers bloom just from a single look.

NARCISSUS (37117) you really don’t need anyone’s opinion about your eyes and you obviously don’t care since you’re your own number one fan lmao!, these natives may be obsessed with their eyes and feel like it’s their best feature!, you are your own admirer.

LOTIS (429) and VESTA (4) innocent ans very pure eyes, both asteroids may indicate having a very pure and serene gaze, you can make people fall onto their knees just to please you, and they may feel the need to protect you from evil even if you’re oh not so innocent!.

MEDUSA (149) you can never hide your envy, it’s one of the most prominent things that show on your face, you may be born needing to wear glasses so alas you envy those who don’t wear them, however your gaze hold are very bewitching, and could make people fear looking into your eyes for a long time especially if you’re a powerful person.

SADO (118230) dark small eyes, my sister has this placement and her eyes are so dark almost black looking instead of normal brown.

FOX (16248) may give you a witty and cunning look, almost like you’re always plotting something mischievous, curios and sly gaze!.

PHOTOGRAPHICA (443) you may like to take lots of pictures of your eyes and post them on social media, in some rare cases you may have a very strong photographic memory!.

GLO (3267) obviously your eyes may be glowy, maybe they are so dark that any slight amount of light makes them shine brightly, or actually they are so light colored that they feel like light itself, you know brown eyes once they turn golden? Yep!.

PTAH (5011) may bless you with a strong commanding gaze which can both hold violence and gentleness, you can command both authority and ooze charisma, but also could turn your gaze into a very love sick one!.

PTAH (5011) spell bounding eyes, very enchanting and captivating.

NADHERNA (5089) very unique eyes, you may have Heterochromia or was born with a unique eye condition which made you need to wear glasses, you may have experienced a really unique eye condition and even your eye color may be rare or different!, and you may have some very long lashes!.

LIST OF ASTEROIDS MENTIONED BY ORDER: 1009, 399, 37117, 429, 4, 149, 118230, 16248, 443, 3267, 216, 5011, 5089.

[bouquetface]

Navamsa/D9 Observation 5

Accuracy entirely dependent on lagna and d9 together. For full accuracy, you MUST read alongside lagna. If not promised in lagna, it will not happen. Navamsa confirms and denies the strengths + lasting effects of lagna predictions.

Venus in 11th House

After marriage, these people can lose interest in working. They can dislike authority figures like bosses. Depending on entire chart, one can work less, stop working or work for themselves. Or simply they dislike their job.

You can benefit from the elder sister. She can gift you something or simply be a good support system.

You can feel life improves through marriage. The spouse is supportive. You can feel secure in the marriage.

You can gain nice things after marriage and/or later in life. ex: expensive cars, big homes, etc. Depending on entire chart, you may not actually be able to afford these things. This placement can struggle to deny themselves what they want. They can be in debt.

Mars in 1st House

This is one indicator for having a mixed relationship with spouse's family. EX: You could like one parent, hate the other, you could like their siblings, dislike their parents. Mars cuts, so you may even distant yourself or cut out spouse's family.

You can desire the spouse to be assertive and active. You can want them to take control, have a good amount of power/status regardless of if they're a man or woman. You need this to feel secure.

However, I have noticed while these people want an assertive spouse, they want control over the spouse - not the spouse controlling them. This can create conflict, as they choose strong independent personalities but desire them to be submissive to them. On the bright side, mars people can like a certain degree of conflict, it can build passion and excitement.

You can become physically active after marriage and/or later in life. You can feel energetic after marriage.

One thing I noticed is these people will get some type of surgery later in life and/or after marriage. ex: c-section, cosmetic surgery are what I have seen irl.

Saturn in 1st House

Spouse can make you more disciplined. The negative would be they restrict/limit things in your life. However, sometimes this can be needed ex: spouse doesn't let you overspend. The spouse can bring stability.

You can marry someone respectable with a good reputation. Honest and hardworking person.

The spouse would be willing to make the marriage work. The marriage can be a responsibility they feel the need to maintain.

Despite what some believe, this is not a delayed marriage indicator. It doesn't indicate early marriage on its own either. It does indicate the marriage bringing stability into your life.

Regardless of if you marry, later in life you will prioritize your appearance. You can workout, consider/get surgeries, eat a healthy diet.

The negative part of this placement: It is said in a past life, you may have rejected rules/laws, disciplines and other saturn themes. Therefore, in this life you will have to deal with feeling rejected yourself. This can manifest as a low point in the marriage where you do not feel accepted for who you are, you could feel controlled and restricted. However, as I said earlier, the spouse would be willing to make the marriage work, they will resolve any issue with you.

And the above will not apply to everyone. There are other ways this rejection can manifest. Accuracy is dependent on ENTIRE d9 AND lagna chart. This post doesn't consider aspects, sign and depositors placement.

Jupiter in 4th House

There can be extra responsibilities in the home after marriage and/or later in life. This can be due to several reasons: many pets, many children, child needs extra care like help tutor them. These are possible examples but entire chart will influence this.

Later in life, you become a very wise person. You put selfish desires away to maintain harmony in the home. You look for the bigger picture - you look for what will benefit the entire family instead of what will feel good for you.

Ketu in 4th House

Often, this shows someone who lives far from their family after marriage. This doesn't always mean out of country, it can simply be a far away city. It can due to conflict or the move but later in life you are disconnected from your family (the one you come form, not the one you may create).

You know how some people's parents may pay or contribute for their wedding, their home, their kids, and things like that? Yours is not likely to do this. You are likely to lose contact or contact family less.

You can enjoy quiet and alone hobbies in the home. You may designate a space in the home for yourself. ex: home office, home library, place to sit on porch or backyard or balcony, etc.

This is one indicator for not liking your in-laws. This doesn't always mean there is conflict. It is likely do to not relating to them. They can have different beliefs or personalities from what you are used to. You simply may not enjoy spending time with them. However, this is only one indicator. For more insight, you should look at 8th House, 8th House ruler in both natal/lagna and d9/navamsa.

Moon in 7th House

This suggests a young spouse - unless aspected by Saturn or other placements contradict such as Saturn DK.

There can be an imbalance in what and who you put your energy toward after marriage. You can focus too much on the spouse and lose yourself.

The spouse or you can be moody. They can be romantic, youthful and giving when they are at their best. When stressed, they can become withdrawn.

Sun in 9th House

You can learn more after marriage. This can be due to marrying someone very different form you. After marriage, you begin to learn more about their way of thinking, their culture, their way.

You will always be interested in learning more. What you're learning will depend on entire lagna and d9.

You can become religious after marriage and/or later in life. You have more interest in religion.

You can have conflict with the elder sibling later in life.

Sun in 10th House

Marriage can bring status. Either you are well known/liked and you introduce your spouse to many or the other way around.

If well placed, this is a very good indicator for a blissful marriage. If badly placed, you will make people think the marriage is good when it is not.

The spouse can be interested in politics. Or you can become interested in politics later in life.

You can lose something in foreign lands with this placement. This doesn't mean you are always having a bad experience in foreign lands. However, at one point you will have very bad experience. examples I have seen: losing work laptop, love affair in foreign lands, fine in foreign lands due to a public policy that the person did not know existed in that country.

[diorcities]

⠀   ⠀ ── ꒡⌓꒡ ... nct dream most likely to 💭 enjoy / being turned on by thigh riding genre smut pairing afab reader x nct dream wc 0,6k

most

jeno. he likes to assert dominance, and he also seems to be the type who likes to keep his girl pleased and satisfied, jeno seems like someone who likes to use and resort to various options, especially if it's about showing how strong he can be, so he wouldn't just rely on penetrative sex to do it. besides having sex standing up because he's able to carry you, he'd also toy you around like a doll, make you sit on one of his flexed thighs, using his strength to rock you back and forth, rubbing your core against his dress thigh until it gets soak wet and has you're all relieved and weeping.

mark. he's quite suggestive, so he gets turned on by anything you do. if you touch his stomach, if you brush his hair a little too long. that doesn't mean anyone can have that power over him, that part is only reserved for you. so obviously the only reaction you'll have when riding his thigh is for the guy to have the biggest erection of his life. he would enjoy it almost as much as you do. poor guy would be so carried away by the sensation of your pussy soaking his leg that he could cum undone without there being any direct interaction with his cock. (he'd be pretty embarrassed, though it's not the first time it has happened)

jisung. he's not as naïve as he seems. in fact, he'd be the one who'd bring up all the things he wants to do with you. it'd be something both would enjoy, not because he gets to receive something in return but because he gets entertained in the process. nothing more amusing for him than to see his pretty girl looking so flushed and trembling only by his thigh. jisung looks like someone playful and the kind of guy who likes to experiment with how he can achieve pleasure.

haechan. he'd be okay with it. maybe it depends on the mood he's in at the moment, but other than that, a guy's not feeling it. of course, he'd let you do it after you beg him and he gets to fill his ego a little. haechan's a tease, so if he happens to know you want that, he'd pull out every dirty move like making you sit on his thigh for nothing to happen for a solid minute so that he can flex his muscles randomly for you to feel it there; unless you take the matter on your own hands, it's not likely to happen. he's volatile, and he likes to keep you guessing. you never know when it comes to him.

jaemin. boy doesn't get it. he gets the part where he fingers you, or eats you out, but the thigh riding thing... simply not his thing. he'd be amused when he sees you being so carried away just by the friction against his skin, at least he gets that. would talk you through it and get turned on when only when you cum and your body jerks under his touch because of the sounds you make. jaemin is very conventional and loves trying new things with you, but he'd stick with the most vanilla part.

renjun. someone who would resort to phantom imagination and be stimulated by the rush of seeing you mostly. during the whole time, guy's imagine you swaying like that on his cock rather than his thigh. renjun has a sub energy (argue w the wall) so he needs more stimulus than your soaked pussy against his skin because he's more of a contact person and the act itself won't do much if you don't tease with a rule that restricts him from touching you while you fuck his thigh.

chenle. shamelessly touches himself while you're jerking on his thigh. the part he doesn't see through is why you preferred that over his dick, but he'd let you carry with it. this guy would make you ride it the same way he would scroll through his phone when he's bored. probably would stop you just when you're about to cum if he's in his usual teasing mood. unless you cry a little; it'd make his cock twitch under his pants. likes to spoil you even though he doesn't get it.

least

[t3a-tan]

A Helping Hand

Decided to write a short snippet to go along with this drawing because why not? Enjoy!

---

“Shhh… No need to panic, little humans.” Cody assured as the cacophony of tiny screams reached his ears. He expected it by now, and as much as he felt bad hearing and seeing how frightened the mortals were he knew that they would be fine.

Checking on Earth was something he made sure to do somewhat regularly; at least once every 250 years. He could be human sized in order to do it, but all of the information he had to receive was much more overwhelming at that height so he preferred to do it like this.

“Ah…sorry, I must be very loud…” He apologised, softening his tone a bit more to avoid causing any damage to the humans or otherwise. Being so large had its drawbacks…luckily, Cody was gentle. After all, even at this size he could still decipher each individual speck of a person. He couldn't be clumsy.

“Hmm…” He hummed in thought, eyebrows pinching together slightly as he leaned in a little closer, scrutinising each country separately. His expression softened.

“Aw…poor things… There's been a few natural disasters recently, huh..? All over the place too. It's alright, I'll fix everything up for you, okay..?” He couldn't outright prevent the disasters from taking place— that would be intervening much more than he felt comfortable doing. He didn't want the humans to become dependent on him after all. He was too busy ruling over Iavoros.

Focusing his powers on restoring what was left of some areas, or bringing life and water to places that had been stuck in a drought, Cody tuned out the panic for the most part. Whenever he came to visit it's not like any humans spoke to him— they were too afraid of him, understandably so.

Which is why he paid close attention when someone did speak up.

“Whatever the fuck you are— h-help me..!”

He tilted his head, ear twitching slightly at the sound. It sounded like…they were asking him directly, not just shouting for help. It took only a few moments to figure out where exactly the plea was coming from, and his eye locked onto the speck immediately…in the middle of the ocean? His eyebrows raised as he noticed that the human was completely alone and in the water, clearly worn out.

Cody was exceedingly careful as he reached down, only dipping the very tip of his nail into the water to avoid causing any other natural disasters in the process of saving one human. He then lifted it again, this time with the human in tow. He kept his finger very close to the water, not wanting to make the human sick by lifting them up too quickly; just providing them with a dry surface to catch their breath on.

He watched as they coughed up water and sat there shaking on hands and knees, exhausted. Cody frowned. How long were they out there? Poor thing.

“H-holy fuck. That…that worked..?” They breathed as they processed what they were taking refuge on now, and Cody couldn't help but feel a little amused by the reaction. He kept his expression soft though, knowing how unnerving the situation likely was for the tiny mortal.

He was silent, letting them process it first and allowing them time to actually recover from almost drowning. Still he couldn't help but feel curious. Humans had spoken to him before, but it was rare and usually it was people asking if he was going to destroy the world or not. Not…asking for help. Even after he had demonstrated throughout history that he was a benevolent figure, their instincts just wouldn't allow it.

It made his job easier in a way. There were so many people to help, and Cody couldn't turn everyone away if they asked him directly… He would feel much too guilty.

“Are you alright, little human..?” He asked, lowering his voice again just to make extra certain that he wouldn't overwhelm the tiny person. It didn't work, as they jolted at the sound of his voice anyway, looking up at the sky with wide eyes, shaking. Cody didn't miss a single anxious movement.

“I…am I dead..?? Are you— no. This is a dream… I'm dreaming…oh my god. No no no…” They panicked. Despite how used to the fear Cody was by now, having it be so…personal, hurt admittedly. He grimaced at the reaction, seeing that the human was overwhelmed, not able to really comprehend him.

He did a quick scan and was unsurprised to see they had hypothermia. He could ask where they were supposed to be, but he doubted he would get an answer…so instead, Cody began to move his finger at an incredibly slow pace towards land.

He winced as he saw the panic of people at the shore, but he continued anyway so he could deliver the human he had saved safely onto the beach. Once they were no longer balanced on the tip of his nail he moved his finger away again, holding his hands to his chest and nodding to himself.

“Alright… I will leave you humans alone again… Try to go back to your usual lives, okay..?” He smiled placatingly, though there was a hint of sadness in his expression now. Hopefully that human gets treated…but it's out of my hands now. I can't bring a human to Iavoros after all.

He waved slightly to the planet, and was cheered up a bit by the knowledge that some were lucid enough to wave back. With that, he disappeared like he hadn't even been there in the first place, leaving Earth and its inhabitants to their own devices once more.

[alphajocklover]

Hey man, so I've tried to be passive most of my life and not cause trouble. Not breaking many rules, doing as I'm told, and it just leaves me with so much missed chances and getting walked all over. I'm kind of tired of it.

I wanna be abrasive, not rude but confident. Almost cocky. And I want the looks to match. I wanna be huge, and bulky, and hairy too. I don't wanna be smart and focused on academics, I wanna chuck balls and pump my cock all day. Weird enough too, I wanna be sweaty. I wanna raise my arms and watch a bunch of gay dudes just melt like puddy.

The best part is, I wanna *feel* this transformation. I want to watch my arms get huge, I wanna hear my voice get deeper, and my chest push out and almost tear my chest. I wanna be...I wanna be...I wanna be a fuckin JOCK

I want to start by assuring you that everything you’ve said, everything you’ve been feeling, makes sense. There are a lot of people out there who are like you, people who have spent their entire lives just blending in. It’s natural to want to fit in, but when you spend so much of your life trying to fit into the norm, it can be easy to forget who you really want to be. When that happens, most people try to change things up. Some chase after a specific new self they dream of being, while others experiment with different identities, trying to find one that fits. But then, there's people like you. People who have spent far too long trying to fit in. For people like you, blending in isn’t a curse: it’s a superpower.

What you have to understand is that a person's identity is far more powerful than you might realize. There's a reason people take names so seriously. Psychologically, socially, and even magically, they’re important. So when a person leaves so much of their identity up to the people around them… it makes sense that a transformation might occur. That they change, literally change, to blend in with others. We call these people Camous. People who have the power to socially blend in, literally, with the world around them. They’re sort of the opposite of Alphas. Alphas change reality to fit their whims, Campus change to fit reality. And from what I hear, you’re becoming one. I know this might sound a little frightening, since having your identity threatened will do that to anyone. But this is a good thing. While changing is scary, you won’t change entirely. Your body, your personality, your traits, and even your reality will change depending on who you’re around, but the core of your identity, your soul will stay the same. You’ll still be you, just… altered. And being a Camou gives you a lot of advantages. It’s true that you won’t ever stand out really, but you’ll always fit in and always be part of a group. And, better than that, you can use your power to choose who you want to be. You want to be a jock, right? A sweaty, hairy, manly jock who makes gay guys weak in the knees? All you have to do is find a group of jocks to join! It isn’t hard to find a group of jocks, even the specific type of hairy gay jocks you’re looking for. You just have to find the right gym, and I know just the one. The Jockstrap is a local gym specifically made to cater to people like you. Or the people you want to be like I suppose. I want you to take a deep breath as we enter. Do you smell that sweat? That manly musk? Breathe in deep, it’ll help the process. Unlike one of the more famous transformation methods I’ve written about, this one isn’t instant. You’re going to feel your biceps fill with muscle, your pecs bursting forward as your body is covered in a respectable smattering of manly hair. It’s already happening. Your shoulders are widening as your chest continues to grow, needing more room on your body. Your legs, your arms, your ass… everything is growing. But that isn’t the only thing that's changing. Your mind is too. I can see the excitement in your eyes as you look around. Working out, exercising, playing sports, hanging with the bros… you’re already getting excited by the thought of it. And without getting too explicit, it’s obvious that you’re excited in other ways. I can see it through your sweat pants (I guess your clothing changed too) and it must be at least 8 inches by now, soft. That rod, your muscles, and the sheer amount of manly musk that's coming from your body now? You’re going to have twinks throwing themselves at you.

Now, since you’re a Camou this transformation isn’t permanent. It’ll last for a while, longer depending on how much time you spend at the gym surrounded by your new bros. The general rule is if you spend one hour with a group, you get three hours as one of them, unless you spend time with a new group immediately after. But the really exciting part is that once you have a form, you can turn into that version of yourself… with some practice, and if you aren’t currently with a large group. 

I honestly can’t believe I haven’t talked about Camous beforehand. Granted, you’re only the second Camou I’ve ever met, but they’re so interesting I can’t believe I’ve never brought them up. I hope you enjoy being a jock, or whoever else you want to try out being. Just, try not to fall in with a bad crowd.

[perpetualcosmos]

Astrology insights on Health & More! Pt. 2

*Please Note these are all my personal observations and research, not yet from a professional opinion!*

---> Body part ruled by Taurus is... Neck, shoulders, ears and throat! Now, What it means is that these natives usually have wide, elegant necks, shoulders and even jawlines depending on where they have their Taurus placements. Ex: Personally seen that natives which have Taurus in either 3rd house, in mercury or Venus conjunct mercury in, 2nd house placements, 3rd house placement and basically mercury placements indicating that these natives have a deep voice.

---> Taurus placements (Specially in conjunction, sextile or trine) always carry an energy of elegance. These natives always have a way with their voice, their body and their posture that draws people in. A pull, sensual and hypnotizing.

---> Prone to be interested in Art, Design, Photography, cinematography, music, dancing, etc., in it's most Venusian form, Taurus natives are hard working... when they want to be, otherwise you cannot pull them for anything to do. They have their priorities straight and keep clear of what doesn't suit them. But the tendency to overindulgence in things like food, sex, drugs, money, etc. Is highly prominent.

---> Really, Financial freedom isn't everything, and so isn't pleasure. A thing I have always noticed with Taurus natives is that they might be inclined to aroma and massages, a good way for these natives to decompress is maybe having a self care day with going to the spa, taking care of your hair, going for aromatherapy, going for shopping and indulging in things which make them feel safe.

---> Security & stability is extremely important to Taurus placements/2nd House placements/Taurus degrees holders (2°,14°,26°). But because of their nature, these natives tend to only focus on financial stability, often forgetting emotional investment is just as important. Signs in the body could be stiff shoulders, a blocked throat, always being told they don't "listen", not being able to take a proper break, mood swings, etc. Extremely prominent when these placements in a person's chart are underdeveloped.

---> Taurus placement carry similarities with their sister sign, Scropio, such as:

• Control - a major theme for both signs in opposite sectors, for Taurus natives, it's mostly money and finance. On the other hand, emotional and sensual control is for Scorpio natives.

• Obsession - as mentioned above, in the sectors.

• Pleasure - Both appreciate Pleasure, for Scorpio placements it's intimate, powerful, a connection and always transformative -- it's in the emotional. For Taurus placements, it's imagination, realistic and 3D focused -- it's in the material.

Ex: Adele with a Taurus Sun in 11th house at 15° (cancer degree)! Should I be even shocked that she is a singer, known for her voice and beauty everywhere? Absolutely not lol. Supporting this, is her Mercury in Gemini in the 12th house at 0° (I can't make this up). She is someone who is known for her music all over the world, carrying so much of her emotions and her ability to reach high notes. She definitely has a beautiful neck and shoulders, with her being very expressive about what she wants through art (which in her case, is music!). Another example is of Keira Knightley with a Taurus moon. Definitely something who carries a strong Jaw and bone structure, along with again wide shoulders and great posture. Her energy also draws in people on the stage, you can't help falling in love with how dedicatedly she carries her with her Moon conjunct Mars in Taurus. No wonder she is so dedicated to her Art (here it's acting). A beautiful thing about Taurus moons is when they find something that they are extremely passionate about, no one can stop them from achieving their goals and giving their best. Especially when they love their work, it shows Everywhere.

Other examples are Zendaya, Nick Jonas, Lindsay Lohan, Donald Grover, Channing Tatum, Miley Cyrus, Gigi Hadid, Robert Pattinson and more.

Source: Pinterest

____________________________

A/N: Thank you for checking this post out and omg thank you for the likes and follows 🥹🫶

*I am so grateful for all of you, thank you for your support. I wasn't sure if I should do this but because of you... I am here. Thank you. And I just want to say if no one has told you lately... I am proud of you, you are trying so hard, even if it's just you being alive. Thank you, I am grateful you are here to read this.*

With love & grace 🥹✨

[heliza24]

Armand and Unbreakable Cycles

So (perhaps unsurprisingly at this point) I have a TON of Armand thoughts after yesterday’s episode. Specifically I want to talk about the function of the 1790s section, and how it perfectly illuminates the cycle of maladaptive behavior that Armand is caught up in and the difference between his stated wants and his actual needs. I think the setup we saw in this episode will also be crucial to understanding how Dubai plays out, so I want to talk about that too.

I know a lot of people love the show and TVC because of Lestat, and there’s some frustration that Lestat was presented in a way that was untrue or filtered. But I really think you have to view this episode as a lens into Armand, which we in turn need in order to understand Louis. Everyone has someone similar to Lestat’s role in Armand’s life; an ex or a situationship or a former friend who takes up so much real estate in your brain because of their outsized impact  on you, who probably never thinks of you in return. We give these people a role in the story we craft of how we became who we are. That narrativizing is kind of the only way to understand yourself and survive (especially if you’re going to live forever). So I don’t doubt that there are things that Armand says that are untrue, or exaggerated, or twisted in his favor. But I do think the important part is the emotional impact his encounter with Lestat had on him, and I do think he’s being honest about those emotions.

(That being said I am of course very excited to see these events play out again in season 3 from Lestat’s POV. Don’t fuck it up AMC!!!)

The main thing that the flashback does is set up the cycle that Armand finds himself in over and over again. He consistently finds himself clinging to control in an institution he is starting to lose faith in, and is then shaken out of his complacency by a new love that seems– falsely– to rescue him.

Depending on how they adapt his very early backstory, I think we can probably assume that this pattern started in childhood for him. Marius rescued him from being forced into sex work, and seemed to offer a much better life. But in reality he was just grooming Armand. (Thanks @toriangeli for correcting a piece of my Marius lore here!)

In Paris he continues maintaining a strictly enforced life of misery for the coven long after he stops believing in it himself, and (by his telling at least) he was grateful to Lestat for having the strength to end it when he could not. It’s so clear why Armand falls for Lestat. Lestat’s refusal to live in shame, his love of the arts, his ability to exist amongst humanity (at least when he is on stage). Lestat is of the world, while Armand and the coven hide from it. 

The reason I think it is so important that we got to see this play out in Paris is the way it illuminates the sometimes tricky relationship between Louis and Armand. Once again, Armand is the head of an institution that operates on strict and oppressive rules. Once again, we can feel Armand’s enthusiasm for this system waning (and see it reflected physically in the lack of ticket sales and general shabbiness of the theatre). And once again, Armand is swept off his feet by this new vampire who refuses to join, who loves humanity, and who has a passion for art. Louis is very much of the world. He refuses to be pinned down into coven life. Armand can’t resist taking what looks like the opportunity for escape in Louis’s love. 

What I think is so fascinating about this cycle is that it allows Armand to remain passive. He never has to be the one to make the hard call to walk away from a kind of life that is no longer serving him. He just has to wait for the next gorgeous man to arrive to deliver him.  As he says to Louis, “those with the most power are often the weakest”. His status and power in the coven prevents him from changing his own life. Or at least that’s what he believes. 

Thinking about this helped me understand the dynamic of what goes down in the sewers, when Armand threatens Louis’s life. Assad says in the behind the scenes clips that Armand goes into that encounter very set on killing Louis, and I believe him.  So I rewatched it a couple of times trying to understand when, and why, Armand changes his mind. The shift occurs when they start talking about Claudia, and Armand says that her mind will break apart soon because she was made too young. Louis says “you don’t know her,” and Armand responds, “I don’t have to. I’ve seen it before. I’ve seen too much.” That admission– I’ve lived through this cycle multiple times before, it is painful, and I don’t want to do it again– is what shifts Armand from being ready to kill Louis to letting him go. 

There is of course an irony here; mentally ill and child vampires do not necessarily need to go mad. Generally they go mad at least partially because of Armand’s actions. And as we’ve already discussed, Armand going to sleep with Louis instead of killing him is really just a repeat of his actions with Lestat. He isn’t really breaking a cycle at all. But I think in that moment he believes that he is. Maybe he even believes that by being with a man who enacted great violence on Lestat, he can drown out the love and anguish he still feels about Lestat. At the very least, Louis has also loved Lestat and can therefore understand Armand’s narration of his own life in a way that not many other people can. 

Ok, so now we are caught up on the past. Let’s talk about Dubai, and how once again Armand is engaged in the exact same cycle of behavior.

The penthouse is Armand’s new coven. He maintains perfect order by controlling the physical environment and shaping Louis’s moods and memories. But just like before, this way of life is no longer serving Armand (or Louis for that matter). You can see that the spark between them has died, only rekindled as a kind of performance when they are in front of Daniel. When Armand is telling Daniel about Lestat destroying the coven, and Daniel accuses Armand of leading Lestat to the coven intentionally… he might as well be talking about himself. Armand has let Daniel into his fortress, and there is at least a part of him that wants whatever destruction Daniel is about to bring into his life.

Daniel fits Armand’s type completely. Daniel is of course more human than Lestat or Louis could ever be. He knows about telenovelas and Bollywood and all other types of art. He’s whipsmart and inquisitive and is not going to let Armand get away with passively maintaining his old order. He’s of the world in a way that Armand finds irresistible. 

I specifically found it interesting how many of the “Great Laws” Armand would be breaking by being with Daniel. Granted, Armand isn’t in the coven anymore when he meets Daniel. But I imagine old habits are hard to break, and being with Daniel would break almost all of them. Daniel is a mortal Armand has revealed his true nature to and allowed to live, Daniel has written about and exposed vampire secrets, and (if we’re looking at book canon) Daniel begs for the dark gift himself, a thing only the maitre is supposed to be able to approve. 

Assuming that a chunk of Devil’s Minion did happen in the 1970s, something interrupted that love affair, before it could settle back down into a new but still oppressive status quo. Something prompted Armand to actively break his pattern of behavior and erase Daniel’s memories. I think it’s impossible not to think about Nicki’s example here, especially after seeing the 1790s flashback. I’m going to assume that 1970s Daniel was struggling with addiction and mental health issues in a way that may have been reminiscent of Nicki. How intentional was Armand in withdrawing because he saw what vampire involvement- his involvement- did to Nicki? How much was his treatment of Daniel a reparation for past mistakes he made?

These last couple of paragraphs are speculation, really, because we won’t know exactly what Armandaniel looked like until Ep 5. But I think it was crucial that we saw this part of Armand’s story before we see San Francisco, because his actions with Daniel will make more sense if we can compare them with the love affairs of Armand’s past.

Regardless, I do think the disparity between what Armand claims to want (maintaining the status quo) vs what he actually wants (to be liberated by a romantic partner) vs what I think he actually needs (to take action himself, instead of waiting for someone to do it for him) is going to play a role in the way Dubai unfolds. I don’t know that Armand will ever get to the point where he’s actively able to break out of the cycle he’s in, because this is Interview with the Vampire, the show of fucked up gothic romances. Vampire life is a series of bad decisions! It’s a weird arrested development you never quite get out of despite living for forever! So it would make total sense if the ending of Dubai mimics the ending of the Children of Satan and the Paris Coven in an unhealthy way. But regardless, it’s gonna be a fun ride, and I can’t wait to see it.