#but damn even a baby goat was way too big

[paintedkinzy-88]

Lmao I made my friend a baby Minecraft goat for his birthday and I’m very happy with how it turned out.

Now I must prepare for the next one, as more birthdays grow nearer…

In other words, yeah I’m probably gonna be focusing on Minecraft statues for a bit, so apologies if I don’t post much else. Not that my silence is unusual right now sobbinggg—

[keilanana]

𝑻𝒐 𝑫𝒆𝒇𝒚 𝑭𝒂𝒕𝒆

ɪ. ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛʜʀᴇᴇ ᴏғ ʏᴏᴜ

Now that you've sort of finally accepted your new circumstances, you take the opportunity of being a baby to stare because you know no one's gonna call you a creep for it (this time).

Penelope is 'Mother', you eventually decide.

You take a lot after her, you realize whenever she decides to hold you up to a mirror one day to show you the newest onesie (cow-themed, this time) she's bought for you. You share her skin tone and eye color, and you're fairly sure you see tufts of [H/c] hair growing in.

Those similarities, however, are the only ones you share with her, for she still looks different from you in plenty of other ways.

Penelope Ophelia is tall—almost reaching up to six feet, you're pretty sure—and thin, her body shape a perfect hour glass. Her hair is straight, but cascades into curls where it ends just beneath her butt, and her eyes are fox-like and almost luminescent when the moon or sun hits them just right. Honestly, had it not been for the fact that she was your Mother, you would have been terrified of her as a stranger.

But it is because of the fact that she is your Mother, though, that you know her appearance is exactly just that: an appearance, and nothing more. Despite the sharpness of her eyes and how cool her skin feels against your own, there is a softness to Penelope that pulls you in and makes you unafraid to curl your small hands into the fabric of her clothes and nuzzle your face into the spot that sits between her neck and her shoulder. She coos everytime you do and always makes sure to nuzzle you back, and it fills your insides with warmth.

She likes to bake in her free time, and is pretty damn good at it if the mouth watering smell of bread or whatever other pastry Penelope decides to bless the Ophelia household with is anything to go by. You unfortunately can't really eat a lot of her pastries due to being a baby that's yet to grow their teeth in, but you've learned long ago that patience is, in fact, a virtue, and you will happily reap your reward once the time finally comes.

(For now, though, you can only suffer in silence as you watch Willow scarf down the best looking cheesecake you've ever seen while Penelope airplanes baby food into your mouth.)

The woman you get your horns and slowly growing goat ears and tail from is Willow Ophelia, now also dubbed 'Mum'.

She's about a head shorter than Mother, but for what she lacks in height, she makes up for in muscle. Due to her apparent appreciation for crop tops, you've already seen just how toned her stomach is, and her arms—while not too big—clearly have a lot of power, though you're sure that's what tending to a farm filled with crops and animals does to you.

Mum's skin is dark and littered with lighter patches (vitiligo, you think?), and her eyes are round and colored forest green. What mainly draws you into her, however, has to be the fluffy cloud of platinum blonde hair that sits atop her head, with goat ears colored the same coming out from the sides and thick, birch-like horns protruding from the top and curling backwards in a way that kind of reminded you of that one old goat from Hoodwinked.

When you see Mother and Mum together, it is then that you finally start to believe the old saying, "Opposites attract."

While Penelope looks and feels cold on the outside despite the pure warmth she freely gives to those she loves and cares for, Willow's appearance is all it takes to hide the fact that—even with the chill, almost goofy demeanor she likes to wear around other people—she is a force to be reckoned with the moment you earn her ire.

Firm, stubborn, and determined, Willow loves fiercely and therefore protects her family with the rage of a soldier. You know that she genuinely does actually like working on the farm, but you also know it serves as something to keep her in shape and ready for a fight, too.

Like with Penelope, however, you can't find yourself feeling any sort of fear for her, and perhaps that is because, as her child—the culmination of hers and Penelope's love—you have only ever known Willow's strength in the form of her strong arms holding you like they're meant to shield you from the dangers of the world and willing to do anything to keep you from harm, no matter the cost. Willow's rage is only for those who deserve it, and already, somehow, you know that—in her eyes, at least—you never will.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

In the night, Mother reads fairy tales to you from an old book she tells you was gifted to her from her grandfather before his passing.

With a rocking chair next to your crib and you safely secured in her lap, positioned so that you could lay against her stomach, Penelope makes sure to hold the book on her lap in a way that allows you to see the pictures that color the pages not littered with words. Her voice is regal, but also possesses an almost rumbly quality to it that makes her chest vibrate enough to where you can feel it, and that alone is nearly enough to send your eye lids fluttering shut.

Mother likes happy endings. She tells you herself after she finishes reading Cinderella to you, one night (a night that you're very proud of because you didn't immediately fall asleep like you usually do when she reads to you), and tucks you into bed.

"The world is nothing like the ones I read to you, little love," she says, the soft smile that had been gracing her delicate features at the time growing at the sight of your small yawn. "I still like to believe that there is a happy ending for everyone, though, and I hope that someday, you will find yours."

She had ended the brief moment off with a kiss to your forehead, and then left you to dream of the daring princes, kind princesses, and fearsome beasts from the stories she had weaved into your mind with her romantic tales.

Mum's stories come in the day. They aren't as frequent as Mother's, but that only makes them all the more special.

When it's time for those moments, no matter how long or short they may turn out to be, Mum likes to take you away from the house and sit near the lake, where you can watch all the little frogs and dragon flies go about their business amongst the lily pads beneath the blue, cloudy sky.

It is in those moments, then, where it is only the two of you, Mum speaks of no fairy tales or happy endings. Instead, she tells you of divine beings greater than you could ever know; beings who envy the very mortals they look down upon because they can feel things they will never be able to fully replicate, and monsters born from people forced into a world and punished for mistakes not even their own. She whispers about the wilds; about how different this world used to be before humanity's advancements. She doesn't blame all of them for their ambition, for wanting to create an easier world for the generations to come, but you don't miss the sad, almost mournful look that flickers through her shiny eyes, looking as if she'd been pulled back into memories from long before.

And when that happens, all you can do is lean back into her and hope that your presence is enough to bring her home.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

This was it. You were finally gonna do it.

You were going to walk today, and no one could stop you.

(A fact that you were very right about, as the only two people who could stop you wouldn't even want to, as any parent's child's first steps is a sacred memory.)

Furrowing your brows in concentration, you shakily lift a hand and place it against the counter next to you for support as you slowly push yourself up onto your feet, a determined frown painting your lips.

Okay. You inhale deeply and try to straighten your back out. Okay, I'm standing up. It's going well so far. Now ...

Narrowing your [E/c] eyes, you begin to look around the room, pondering: Where should I walk to?

As if on cue, Mother steps into the room, and she gasps—loudly.

"Willow!" She turns to yell up the stairs. "Willow get the camera and come quick!"

You hear something clatter from above, but you pay it no mind and instead focus on the the long, white sundress your Mother had decided to wear today.

Bingo.

Taking another deep breath to hype yourself up, you slowly, but surely, take a small step. The action, of course, has your Mother returning her gaze to you faster than anyone can blink, and she gasps again.

"WILLOW! HURRY, LOVE!!"

"I'M HURRYING, I'M HURRYING!!"

Stumbling down the stairs, Mum slides over to Mother's side and nearly drops the camera she's holding in the process—both from the fact that her entrance had almost led to her landing flat on her face, and the shock of seeing you trying to walk.

Choosing to focus on your goal instead of the two women standing in front of you, their eyes filling with tears, you keep your eyes glued to your feet as you carefully take another step, and another one, and another one ...

"Look at you go, kid!" Willow whoops from behind the camera as she takes pictures.

Standing next to her wife, Penelope beams at you and claps her hand, practically glowing the pride. "That's it, little love! Keep going!" she cheers.

Soon enough, the counter is no longer there to support you, and you look up just in time to give your moms a gummy smile as your little legs take you stumbling forward into Mother's legs. The women cheer, and Willow takes one last picture of you hugging Penelope's legs like a koala before setting the camera aside and picking you up, grinning widely.

"That was amazing, kiddo!" She holds you between Mother and herself so they can both smother you with kisses. "Does this mean you're gonna be talking soon, too?"

You giggle, the sound high pitched and bright, and it makes your moms snuggle you even more.

The Ophelia household is warm for the rest of the day, and you can't help but hope it'll stay that way for the rest of your second life.

<- Previous Chapter || Next Chapter ->

Tag List: @randomgurl2326

[creedslove]

Who of the boys would be more of a cat and who would be more of a dog person?

Rewatching Narcos currently andJavi P seeking justice for Murphys cat was the animal love I needed.

I know he says he’s not much of a cat person but the way he treated it.. cat man 🧐🫶

Featuring: Javier Peña, Joel Miller, Agent Whiskey, Dave York and Marcus Pike

A/N: aww this is a very good idea!!! I love it honey! Also, I have a feeling all the Pedro boys lean towards dogs, but that doesn't mean they won't go soft with a kitty 🐈

Javier Peña: Javi likes dogs better, there's no argument towards that, he grew up around dogs on his dad's ranch and he loves how strong and loyal they are, however, that doesn't mean Javi is insensitive towards cats, we all have seen how fierce he was to fight for the fact that cat was DEA as much as Steve and himself were, even if there was a tiny comical hint to it; Javier isn't a huge cat person, but he does have a soft spot for them, they are cute sometimes and amongst all the violence he has encountered through his life, he thought he would lose that empathy towards smaller things, but he was very wrong, so once he saw a stray kitty fumbling around the garbage to look for food and it made his heart break, he didn't know why exactly, but he was so tired of seeing the evilest side of people, it felt just too unfair such a tiny cute little creature starve on the streets, which caused Javier to feed the cat leftovers of his meals which quickly became a habit and now the cat is fat and he doesn't know what to do

Joel Miller: Joel Miller is 100% dog person and there's no argument about that at all, although after he grew up and had to take care of a house and a baby daughter on his own, he decided to have a no pet rule: money was tight and so was time, taking care of a baby, and then a toddler and then a child and then a teen was exhausting as it was, so he didn't have time for bullshitting with cats or dogs. In fact, getting a puppy was the only request Sarah has ever made him and he managed to remain strict and not let her have it. However, he knows his daughter pets all the neighbor's pets and he's okay with it. Now, if you have a cat, you can expect Joel getting into a grumpy old man mood™ he is just going to complain about the cat and he is going to swear that cat is up to no good, plotting against him because its so jealous of you. He will definitely have arguments with your cat

"get out of my guitar now!"

"meow"

"I swear... get off my truck or I'll kill you!"

"meow"

And well, sometimes it kind does seem your cat is teasing Joel by sitting on his truck hood or sitting on his beloved guitar; if Joel is reading some work papers on the kitchen table you can bet your life your cat will climb all the way just to sit ON the papers and make Joel's blood boil, and you'll de damned if that ain't the funniest shit you'd ever seen; but hey, sometimes after you went to bed, your cat nuzzles Joel's body and your tough boyfriend actually pets your cat, but it's their secret and neither of them will ever admit it 🤫

Agent Whiskey: our sweet Jack loves animals! He is a farm boy after all, and that means he absolutely adores every single living thing. Of course he likes dogs and cats like everyone else, but those aren't his favorites, if anything, Jack is the kind of man to have farm animals as pets as if it was the most normal thing in the world. As a grown man, Jack has his own ranch, and he keeps all the animals he likes there: he's got cows, horses (his big passion), pigs, chickens, goats, bunnies, dogs and a few cats in the barn because someone needs to catch those damn mice, since he hates killing any kind of animal, he leaves it for the cats to chase down the mice and if he finds spiders in the house he'll definitely just throw them outside. He loves birds and fish but he'd rather watch them out in nature than have them trapped in birdcages of fishbowls; he's not a big fan of frogs but he doesn't mind them at all and his biggest childhood trauma was when little Jack befriended a very cute little pig and the two of them became quickly inseparable, playing together and hanging out all the time, he even named his pig Hector™ until one Sunday morning he woke up to see his friend gone and later, mama Daniels had made pork chops for lunch ☠️ Jack cried his little heart out, refused to eat lunch and spent years without eating pork, until this day he feels kind of guilty to eat bacon or something, he doesn't kill any of his own ranch animals to cook, he just goes to the supermarket to get the meat

Dave York: Dave had always loved dogs from a young age, when he was little, his dog Sprinkles was his best friend and he still keeps old pictures of himself and his old friend in the back of his memory boxes. Once he grew up and he got into his... business... he realized dogs are the safest option for a pet; they are very rational, they can be trained and protect the house and the owners against threats or burglars. If his kids beg him for a puppy, he will never say no to them, but it will be frustrating to him that they will pick the cutest and fluffiest puppy over the one breed he thinks it's safer for the family, statistical saying. However, how happy they get will make him think of Sprinkles and soon enough he will become those dads who treat the family pet better than his own kids. He will definitely doze off on the couch and the dog will be curled up to him. Dave also admires the felines and mostly how neat and careful they are. They are silent and are able to sneak into a room without anyone noticing, exactly like Dave does when he's out working, he likes how cats are independent and always take care of themselves, however, the idea of having a cat never occurred to him, but well... never say never

Marcus Pike: that man is the human version of a golden retriever, so he obviously would prefer dogs. He has thought of getting a dog some time but he hasn't made up his mind yet, on one hand, he would like to have a puppy waiting for him at home so he won't be too lonely, but on the other hand, dogs are a lot of trouble and he doesn't know if he will be able to actually take care of it, not to mention dogs remind him a lot of the perfect image of a happy family, you know, a husband and a wife and kids, something Marcus would love to have but he hasn't been too lucky with it lately! He does like cats too, but the thing is: he is allergic to cats, and I don't mean just a slight allergy, I mean sneezing, coughing, red puffy eyes, stuffed nose etc, so cats are definitely a big no to him!

[franciebelle-com]

Harvey headcanon? I think that's the term? Anyway... here's our favorite mustache man in love....

● Harvey is confident about himself as a doctor. He knows what to do, what is expected, and has a kind professional demeanor. With the farmer, he is less confident, as he doesn't initially know much about them, what they like, want, or expect from a partner.

● Loves to surprise you. Sometimes tells lame jokes, just wants to see you smile.

● Very romantic ideas... listens to you, pays attention to details. Gives thoughtful gifts, like a tea set for someone who likes tea. Or a houseplant if you like to use them for decor. Gives flowers to spouse at random.

● Skilled dancer. He can sweep you around the dance floor like a pro. Loves Jazz, Big Band music, Classical, 80s & 90s pop music. Is a pretty good singer, baritone. Will sometimes sing along with music, softly in your ear.

● Loves to cook for you and with you. Will watch cooking shows with you and plan meals. Makes excellent breads, even though he doesn't frequently eat bread. Kneading works out frustrations! Loves your cooking, and even if it's a failure, is supportive. Will blatantly lie about your spectacular failure in public, and helps with dishes.

● Gives wonderful massages, and enjoys giving them to you. You work hard, and this is one way he can help you. Sometimes they become very sensual, so a suggestion for a mutual massage comes with flirtatious behavior.

● Is willing to try new things, like foods, experiences, travel, enjoys finding ways to get away from the usual routine, travel, etc. Sometimes he suggests new ideas. He's led a somewhat sheltered life, and you bring a sense of adventure to him.

● Feels things deeply, and sometimes struggles to articulate his emotions. He knows you well enough to recognize little signs of your own feelings, like tiredness, frustration, sadness, etc. and will quietly support you without making a big deal out of it. This is one way he shows you his love. His hugs are amazing, both strong and comforting, and will just hold you, without demands or conversation, whenever he senses you need it (or ask for it). He likes being held, too.

● Enjoys talking with you, listening to your stories, sharing experiences, discussing both serious and fun things, reads for pleasure, and loves having intelligent conversations on a variety of subjects.

● Grew up wanting to be a knight in King Arthur's court. Loves reading about medieval and other historical time periods. Is very courteous with you, even if you've been together for years, like pulling out your chair at dinner and holding doors for you (and others).

● Is willing to do plenty of work on the farm, maintaining buildings, fences, prepping the house for winter, etc. He's skilled at chopping wood, feeding animals, minor vetinary services, watering crops, picking crops. Does not have much of a green thumb, but is excellent at planning crops, predicting yields, marketing, research and improvements on the farm, all that you need to help you accomplish your dreams/goals. Thinks baby goats are adorable.

● Has a subtle but strong sense of humor--loves Monty Python, British humor, stand-up comedy, and shows like "What We Do in the Shadows", as well as Flight of the Concords. Will watch period dramas with you, and secretly loves Downton Abbey.

● Is surprisingly sensual and adventurous in the bedroom. Learns what you like, what turns you on, positions you enjoy, and giving you pleasure. Turning you on gets him turned on, too. Loves it when you initiate intimacy. He is damn sexy and spontaneous. Gives you smouldering looks from across the room. His kiss can be tender, passionate, fiery, and make you weak in the knees. Moustache can be intriguingly ticklish....

[o-xurxur-o-sosoj]

things that add up to "im a literal switched by faeries-style changeling:"

+ my g. great gramma said when i was born, that she remarked that she didnt know if she could ever love me because i looked too much like my father (oof damn), and I ended up quickly changing to look like my mom and ??? something else. She is still the most active ancestor in my daily life.

+ physically disabled in myriad ways bc my body is just not human and not meant to function here or is inherently frail or something. sometimes faeries would give their frail babies to humans to raise?

+ Madness and odd behaviors and inclinations that arent easily boxed into clinical labels even despite the autism n shit being stereotypical of changeling identified folks.

+ a long history into childhood of liking the name Puck/relating to Puck, and eventually going on to relate to various fae called pookas, down to shapeshifting to and having hearttypes/theriotypes of forms like fox, crow, wolf, dog, goat, cat, rabbit, human, and more that are related to pookas.

+ have a "true form" that has looked eerily the same as at least 2-3 other self described pookas in the kin community that i had no influence on or from. Very Large, almond shaped eyes like alien eyes, a long, lion-like tail, an oddly lanky + bony body with a big tummy, a long mane, a featureless semi-animal face, and features that shapeshift over time.

+ look physically like a Fair person, get commented on as fairy-looking all the time, have small pointed ears, eyes that have ... characteristics both ethnic and Fair, we will say, and other physical characteristics of Fair Folk

+ everyone that joins our system doesnt just gain a connection to humanity (each in their own specific way, for me its prehistoric pre-humans) but their own connection to animality and shapeshifting and other traits that are distinctly not human, no matter what species or fictotypes they came in as. I suspect this is bc its just hardwired in.

probably lots of other very personal things ill keep to myself for now. Wondering if anyone else relates to this, in the sense of being a biological changeling and/or having this specific sort of "true form" Pooka presentation?

(not a pshifter, rad/queers dont interact)

[calico-heart]

WIP excerpt of a post-Main Story Lyrha/Astarion fic.

Lyrha's cryptic pregnancy ends badly when she enters labour prematurely and complications nearly claim her life - as well as out her secret condition to Astarion. Not exactly the best way to learn you're a dad.

Tags: Dangerous Pregnancy, Unwanted Child, PTSD, Angst & Snark

"You could have died. You would have died." He snarled, "It's a miracle we're even having this conversation. Honesty, what were you thinking?"

“I was thinking it’s not your problem to deal with, so there was no reason to tell you.”

“Well I’m afraid you’ve created a fairly big problem for me, Darling.” He scoffed, hands spreading with irate disbelief, “After months of secrecy, you’ve spent days at death’s door and left me this screaming brat to tend to with no preamble." A hand flourished. Red eyes fixed on her accusingly, "Do you have any idea how hard it is to find a wetnurse for such a bedraggled little beast? Especially when you can’t enter a house uninvited, and only under cover of moonlight?” His teeth bared.

“Well I didn’ ask ye to.” Lyrha hissed, voice crackling over the edge of her pain. “When have I ever obliged of you anythin'? Never. I never planned t'involve ye at all.”

“Oh? And how did you imagine that was going to work out?” His lip twisted, “Were you going to hide it under the floorboards?”

“I was goin' to get rid a-" Her throat seized over the words, somehow too horrible to finish out loud, even after weeks of planning. Knowing. She shook her head, "I wasn' keeping it. I knew you wouldn't want it."

"Well you were right about that." He scoffed, nearly sneered. She was used to the bite of his ire, but it hurt this time. Body and mind were weak, and the knife of him slipped into vulnerable places all too easily, twisting. Lyrha flinched.

Astarion's eyes narrowed. Quieter, he asked, "…But what do you want, Lyrha?"

The temperature in the room seemed to drop. Lyrha shut her eyes, jaw clenched so tight she thought it might shatter. “I want you t’know ye don’t owe me… or the - the babe anything. I wouldn’t try t’trap ye like that.”

“I’m grateful, but that isn’t what I meant and you know it.”

She huffed, voice straining higher with each word, “I wanted never t’be in this damn situation, tryin’ t’explain things t’ye and - and…”

“Lyrha…” A heavy sigh. His gaze stayed fixed on her, searching for something. Maybe for a lie. Or a half-truth.

He surprised her again, “I’m angry. But not about the baby. You can do what you want with it.” He dismissed flatly, then leaned forward, “I’m upset because you didn’t tell me about it. We’re supposed to be in this together, in theory. You should have included me before the damn thing nearly killed you.”

She absolutely should not have. She’d seen many times what happened to women who sprang unexpected, unwanted babes on their men. Especially those who'd promised such things were impossible. Women tried to entrap their brigands all the time, and most often, at best, it got them left stranded. She deflected, “It might not even be yours.”

He laughed, harshly, once. “You haven’t seen the teeth on that thing yet. It's absolutely mine.” Something lighter twinged in his tone, though it left her more anxious rather than less. He was capricious, especially when cornered. “I suppose this rather refutes the whole ‘spawn can’t create vampires’ law.”

Teeth already? Lyrha blinked. Grimaced. Then, "… you said you found a wetnurse for it? Even-?"

Another irritable puff, "I found a goat." His voice pitched high again, "It's downstairs. Eating the furniture. But I couldn't very well keep it outside in the sun."

[a-thirst-for-dunmer]

My favorite things about all my Skyrim followers:

KAIDAN

-wicked ass armor and weapon with fucking tigers on it

-realistic cursing in life or death situations

-literally the most realistic male dialogue ever with his corny ass innuendos. ‘This monument, does it remind you of me, love? Just kidding.’

-so goated in battle. Mans can kill a dragon so easy and i don’t need to do anything but look pretty

-ACCENT.

CARYALIND

-his hair is so fluffy. I bet it smells like roses and vanilla bean, what’s your secret bb

-such a sweetheart all the time. No wonder he can’t be Thalmor, he has too much heart for it

-fucking backstory. It’s very Zuko without villain redemption arc, and the fact that he still worries about the LDB thinking worse of him for being Thalmor royalty is just *chef’s kiss*

-ACE REP. I really fucking love how he can dress like a hoe, flirt like a hoe, and look so hot but have no interest in sex. Mmm that’s my jam that’s what I like.

-boob window

-Kaidan interactions! Proving that Altmer can be kind and sweet and not lighting-shooting British assholes

INIGO

-the backstories for everyone are so damn tearjerking but this guy?? Don’t even get me started on this mans scars I will cry

-literally autism. Says everything on his mind. Sir you are me

-blue. And a cat. What else??

-Lucien and him have a bromance that hits so good

-suplexes Nazeem with only his vibes

-sings original songs, where’s his soundcloud

KHASH

-okay first off i was writing a character just like her for the daughter of my LDB and Revyn. Never knew about her but this is Leeta come to life and i crave it

-pottymouth

-Kaidan Big Bro protection dialogue

-so happy when she kills things

-literally exactly what I expected a baby Argonian to sound like. So cute. So grumpy

-her outfit is just on point. If i hadn’t transitioned i would be cottagecore peasant dress woman with cats

LUCIEN

-like Cary, he is just sweet himbo no brain

-kid in a candy shop vibes. He is amazed by the wonders of this world

-the nerdiest mans you know, would probably never shut up about shit with Auryen but i haven’t gotten that far yet

-bottom energy

-AUTISM once again

-also sings!! Can sing ‘Toss a Coin to Your Witcher’ parody!!

AURI

-she is the Moment

-eats people and only meat. Wanna see someone react to ThatVeganTeacher with her as a vtuber model oml

-bullies Lucien (affectionately)

-cool pod

-looks like she could kill you and could actually kill you

-slams ALL haters and unworthy into the ground with her dialogue. Faendal ily but you don’t deserve her

RUMARIN

-a sweetheart himbo

-very Skilled with magic, specifically bound weapons. As someone who uses conjuration as their main line of magic, because dremora and bound bow go brr, I LOVE THAT

-not really good at speaking poorly of anyone tbh

-like lucien, he’s optimistic and fun to be around

-very…earthy. Jank. Grungy. Not what you’d expect from an Altmer, to be living as an adventurer mercenary, and i like that for him

-eats in bed, brain too empty to clean for long periods of time

-polyamorous pansexual King

-says Z like zed, which makes linguistics in Skyrim lore interesting

NEBARRA

-literally me

-sarcasm to the max

-name means ‘foreigner’ or ‘scorned’ or something transgender. anyway, king nihilist shit

-only wants the good wines

-also, the Accent, very good very sass

-Shakespearean insults for days

-also regular insults

-just…insults

-mystery and striking fear into the hearts of all

TALIESIN

-i thought no one could top Revyn in vibes of what Elder Scrolls character i would kin but then ✨he✨ came along

-no idea why Altmer are Brits but with him, i can vibe with it he sounds so good

-giggles evilly in fights

-s a s s

-pansexual!! We are putting queer in the game! (Even tho all vanilla spouses are, in the most Basic sense, bisexuals)

-the spice he can add with Cary as a protector/snarky best friend. I Need their backstory

-afraid of dogs, cat person

-just an absolute bitch to the Dragonborn but like in a way my gay friends are to me

-eyeliner on fleek

HONORABLE MENTIONS FOR SKEEVER AND CROC

-silly voice go brrr

[heart-of-the-morningstar]

SPOILER REVIEW FOR ACROSS THE SPIDER VERSE BELOW THE CUT

1000000/10, best movie, go see it immediately, Spider-Man my beloved 💖💖💖

- The Visuals

• Holy shit guys, this might be THE best animated movie ever created. They took the visuals and art styles from the first movie and cranked it up to 10,000!!

• Seeing all the Spider people in different art forms had my eyes glued to the movie, there were so many Easter eggs and nods to other popular Spiders, I know I didn’t see them all!

• The backgrounds were absolutely gorgeous! My personal favorite being the ones from Gwen’s universe, almost every shot had different colors in the background and it was just mesmerizing!

• They did a fantastic job distinguishing each universe from one other by using different color schemes and art styles, even when some of them looked similar, you could tell there was something different!

- The Characters

• They definitely go all in on character development in this film, they wanted to give everyone more character and personality and backstory. We’re missing a few of our Spider friends from the first film but they’re replaced with some new faces!

• Miles, the absolute GOAT, was such a great protagonist in this film. We spend a lot more time with his family this time around and they didn’t shy away from the slow and heavy moments. His mom even gets more of a role in this movie and she was great! He’s only 15 y/o in this movie and absolutely outsmarted every single other Spider at one point which was great to watch! There’s a plot point in the movie concerning Miles that will absolutely break your heart 😭

• Gwen gets a lot more screen time than in ITSV, she’s a stand out character in this movie! We get to see the relationship she has with her dad and get to go more in depth about how she lost her Peter! And I’m happy they didn’t rely too heavily on the romantic aspects between Gwen and Miles, but they touched on it and it was incredibly sweet!

• Miguel O’Hara my beloved!!! (I’m an Oscar Isaac stan, Moon Knight was the best Marvel tv show, fight me on it, lmao) I wouldn’t consider Spider-Man 2099 a villain, but he made a very good antagonist to Miles, he was very threatening! He didn’t get a very in-depth back story but you were given just enough information to sympathize with his pain. Something seemed fishy about his story, maybe I’m reading too much into it, but I’m hopeful they dive into it more in the sequel!

• SPIDER-PUNK, HOBIE BROWN OMG, what a fantastic new addition, he’s such a fucking anarchist and it’s great! He speaks in a thick cockney accent and I love his rebellious nature, he don’t give two shits about what anybody thinks! His character’s look might be the most impressive in the film, apparently it took animators 3 years to make him look the way he did!!

• Pavitr Prabhakar, baby boy, sunshine!! He’s a little cocky but in a cute way! His home of Mumbattan was SO GOD DAMN COLORFUL! I honestly wished he had more screen time because he was super funny and HIS HAIR, SO FLUFFY AND SOFT!!!

• Everyone’s favorite Peter B Parker makes a return! I can say he didn’t have as big of a role in the film as ITSV but he was still great regardless! And now he has a baby girl named Mayday!! And he kept trying to show everyone pictures of her like an actual new parent would lol.

• Jessica Drew is also a new character! She was super badass with her Spider Cycle! AND she was pregnant the whole movie which is even more badass! (Also, side note, when Gwen asked about her pregnancy, I really appreciated that Jess said that they she didn’t know the sex of the baby instead of saying gender, it was small but I liked that little detail!)

• Spot, the main villain of this movie (and the next) was interesting! If I had any real complaints about this movie, it would be that Spot was not in this movie as much as I hoped. I understand why because this is the first part of a 2-part movie, but by the end of the movie, he shows up and I was like “Oh yeah, Spot, where the hell has he been??” But he technically is a character we’ve seen before (I don’t wanna say who because it’s actually funny who he turns out to be!) He starts out being kind of goofy but he gets very threatening!

• There are bunch of other minor characters that I won’t go too deep into but my favorite minor character had to be Ben Riley, he was made to be super over dramatic and stated really obvious things while he was on patrol, got a few laughs out of me!

- The Plot

• Babes, the story is so good in this. I don’t want to give EVERYTHING away cuz I want y’all to see it for yourselves but I will say that this is a 2-parter! There is a “to be continued” at the end of the movie just so you’re prepared!

• The basic premise is that the Spiders have to take down Spot because he’s hopping to different dimensions, making himself more powerful. Spot has a personal grudge against Miles and wants to take away everything from him. You can tell from the trailers that Miles is trying to defy Miguel and what he’s doing, which ends up going in a very suspenseful direction! Again, not going to spoil everything, but it’s just such a great story!

• Like I said, they focus more heavily on family dynamics in the sequel which I loved! More time with Jeff and Rio which was nice to see, Rio has a great talk with Miles during the movie and it was so heartfelt! Gwen and her dad have a few scenes together too, it’s a really great relationship to watch unfold. Gwen and Miles have some great character moments together, but of course it’s not all positive!

• The dynamic between the different Spiders is a blast as well! I was never bored with this movie, it kept me engaged even during the non-action sequences because they did a great job making you care about these characters!

• This movie clocks in at almost 2 1/2 hours but I promise you, you’re not gonna feel that time. I did not want this movie to end! They throw so much at you but at the same time, you’re gonna leave wanting more!

• Where this movie ends is…wow!! I can say I definitely didn’t see it coming until a few seconds before they revealed what was going on, and I sat there and just went “oh…oh no…” for the last 10-15 minutes lol. And apparently the sequel will be out next year! And thank God cuz I could not wait another 3 years!

• A heads up! There aren’t any end credit scenes so you don’t have to stay for those! The only thing that happens after the initial credits is text appearing saying “Miles Morales will return in…” and it gives you the next movie title (won’t say what it is!)

- Miscellaneous (mostly Easter eggs and cameos)

• There were so many GOD DAMN Easter eggs in this film, it’s insane! I know I’ll have to watch it a few more times if I want to catch everything the put in here! There is def one cameo that stands out above everything else (I won’t say who, but you’ll know when you see him 😏)

• They actually showed very brief scenes from Toby Maguire and Andrew Garfield’s movies which caught me completely by surprise, but I sure as shit was happy about it!!

• They don’t show any scenes from Tom Holland’s Spider-Man (which I understand cuz Marvel 🙄) BUT they make two references to it, one with a line from Miguel and with the cameo I mentioned previously!

• The Spectacular Spider-Man had a fucking voice line and I almost passed out, like I watched the shit out of that show, I was so happy he was included! They also showed the PS4/PS5 version of Spider-Man which I thought was pretty funny!

- Final Thoughts

• Peak cinema! The story, the characters, the visuals…all incredible! Go watch it right now immediately!!

[death-and-other-myths]

The Queen of Nothing Deadass Book Review

Okay look, this book has everything. Our main character is an unhinged monster. Her husband was raised by a cat or something. There's snakes. GOD DAMN I LOVE THIS BOOK.

This is an unhinged book review of The Queen of Nothing By Holly Black.

*SPOILERS AHEAD*

Well the 3rd and final book in this series starts out with a bang, with the prologue painting Cardan’s tragic backstory as a baby taken to meet his father by his shitty, neglectful mom. Baefin, the royal astronomer shows up and decides to ruin everyone’s day by saying, “Hey, the stars say this kid is going to topple your kingdom and you’ll never have another child after him.” — so right out of the gate, everyone hates Cardan. His siblings play with him like a puppy. His Mom is the flakiest asshole. She uses a… cat..?? As a wet nurse?? Like WOW LADY. Both CPS and PETA would like a word with you.

There’s a super sad part when Cardan is older, and Dane is messing with him. They are shooting a walnut off of a mortal’s head, who happens to be Val Moren’s lover. Val Moren was the old High King’s sineschel, and his heart was broken for the rest of his life after his boyfriend got shot with an arrow by these big dumb faerie princes.

Dane offers to switch arrows, so if Cardan messes up and hits the man, everyone will think Dane did it. Cardan says fine, but chickens out when it comes time to shoot. So Dane shoots Cardan’s arrow into the guy’s chest, and tells everyone that Cardan did it. So as punishment, they sent Asha into jail and cultivated Cardan’s reputation of being a heartless asshole. It’s just shit all around. GOD THIS POOR BABY I CAN’T BELIEVE I EVER THOUGHT HE WAS A MONSTER. HE IS THE SWEET, MESSED UP PRODUCT OF HIS AWFUL FAMILY. AUGH.

Meanwhile, in the mortal world…

Jude is watching Oak play war games with the other 5 year olds and he keeps accidentally glamoring them (so he appears invisible until he attacks). When all of his friends leave, she sneaks up on him and you know, almost chokes him out. Like sisters do!

He’s all upset with her and she’s like “I’m just trying to show you that fighting is real, and it’s serious, and it’s not a game!” and he says he never ever wants to be king, which makes this reader happy.

At night, Jude makes money by doing odd jobs for the local faeries. They apparently can live in the mortal world, usually because they’re in hiding or exile or just because they want to. She meets up with one of the Roach’s old friends, who is a goat man that gives her a job to go talk to a lady named Grima Mog and tell her to quit murdering people.

Grima Mog is part of the “Court of Teeth”, and is a warrior who was banished for one reason or another and is causing a scene in the real world. Jude goes over, tells her to cut it out, and Grima Mog challenges her to a duel on the roof. Jude wins, because she is still a savage badass. And in return, Grima Mog tells her the latest hot goss: That King Cardan is going to be overthrown before the next full moon.

Jude is like cool I don’t care about him. Yep. Totally don’t care about that loser who is also my husband. Fuck him. Ima ride the bus home covered in blood. So she does that.

And when she gets home, Heather is there trying to pluck up the courage to see Vivi again. But moreover, TARYN IS THERE in her flowy pretty dress and Jude is like “Get the fuck out.” (still covered in blood by the way).

Taryn explains that she MURDERED LOCKE. Like not even in self defense or anything. He pissed her off and slept around, so she stabbed him with a LETTER OPENER and THREW HIM IN THE OCEAN so his body washed up a few miles downshore all chewed up, and now she has to go to Faerie court and be glamored to tell the truth. So she’s asking Jude if she’ll pose as her and go in her stead.

Jude can’t really resist the opportunity to get back into Faerie land and slap her husband, so she agrees. Also Taryn drops the bomb that she’s pregnant too. So ... damn. I guess being bloodthirsty maniacs runs in this family. Like whoa.

Alright, Jude goes back to Elfhame pretending to be Taryn. She spends a brief night in Locke’s house where she finds drugs just… everywhere. Gold stuff is smeared on the couches and the servants bring her a faerie apple with dinner, which Jude finds hella weird since that stuff is like heroin to humans. She’s starting to realize Taryn isn’t as innocent as she thought. As if the whole “murdering her husband” thing wasn’t her first clue.

She walks into the courtroom and gives a curtsey, and Cardon goes “…Taryn?”

She’s like “Yes m’lord tis I, sweet lil’ innocent Taryn. Look at me all in my pretty little dress being demure and cooperative.”

Cardon smirks and is like “okaaayyyy. Begin the questioning.”

Jude is standing there thinking “Cardon you dumb fuck I’ve tricked you. You’ve played right into the palm of my hand, you treacherous scum.”

And we as the reader realize it’s pretty fucking obvious that he knows its her. And that he looks elated to see her.

He “glamours” her to only be able to tell the truth and asks her if she killed Locke. Jude says no. So Cardon turns to Nicasia and his Mom (who are also there) and is like “Welp, she didn’t do it. Guess we can all go drink and party and forget this ever happened now. Like we did when Valerian died. Remember how no one seemed to care about that?”

But Jude has to take it a step further and be like “I think the sea had something to do with it.”

Nicasia is pissed. “WHY would the sea start shit if we have a treaty with the land? Also Locke was my friend! If anyone killed him it was probably your horrifying sister. She loves murdering people. She does it like, all the time.”

Lady Asha chimes in like “It’s court gossip that Locke was fooling around with both you and your sister. Maybe she killed him to get revenge because she loved him.”

And Jude (as Taryn) says, “My sister only loves one person, and it’s not Locke.”

Cardan is unable to stifle his glee.

“And she wants that person dead.”

Cardan bristles.

Nicasia says they can’t trust anything “Taryn” says because she could be wearing a charm to resist glamour (implying Jude should strip in front of the court). But Jude can’t do that without revealing herself, since she’s all scarred up and Cardan knows every single one of those scars.

Luckily, our boy is on to this so he’s like “How about I personally inspect her for charms in my quarters. Alone. Away from here. This is totally normal, right?” And the court is like “Right!” So they’re walking to his room. And a servant runs into her with a tray, and slips her a knife and is like “Don’t worry miss Taryn. Your father is coming to save you.” And Jude is like What? Shit. What??

But then she’s alone in Cardan’s room and he is immediately like “Oh my god how are you? Did you get my letters? I wrote you every day but you never replied. Hi.”

And Jude is FLABBERGASTED “You knew it was me?!”

“From the second you walked into the room?? You’re my wife? God, you’re cute.”

She’s still pissed at him though for tricking her, which to us is very obvious to us that it was for her own protection, but Jude thinks he’s awful. She shows him the knife someone gave her and for a moment he’s like… wait… shit… is she going to stab me? She kind of likes making him think she will. But she tells him Maddock is up to something, then there’s a huge explosion. And instead of stabbing Cardan, she goes back to her warrior ways like “Stay here!” Even though he’s shouting at her not to.

Jude takes like 2 steps outside the door and gets knocked out with Faerie chloroform by some of Maddock’s knights.

She wakes up in a carriage with Oriana being carted off to Maddock’s stronghold. And everyone is like “Sorry Taryn! It was just easier to get you out of there if you were… you know… unconscious for 3 days.” (Wtf faerie people??)

So now Jude is STUCK pretending to be Taryn in Maddock’s snowy army headquarters near the Court of Teeth territory. She has to hang out and pretend to like Oriana, her prim and boring stepmother, and convince everyone she’s Taryn or Maddock will literally kill her.

During her time in camp, she meets Grimsen the master forge guy, who likes compliments and young girls (which is hella gross). She flirts with him to learn about his magic weapons and learns he’s making a crazy powerful sword for Maddock to use to take Cardan’s crown.

Jude has an awkward conversation with Maddock where he’s like “I never much cared for Jude. God she’s so annoying. You’re cool though.” He also tells her that when he saved her from the palace, half his knights got murdered in the process. He said the doors shrunk and trapped his men inside, then vines came down from the ceiling and strangled them. Only the ones running with her made it out alive and everyone else got savagely choked to death. So like… Cardan is a badass and can still control the land around him. And clearly he does not take kindly to people kidnapping his wife.

Jude decides she needs to run away before anyone catches on to her, and on her way out, she stops to inspect this cave set far away from the camp. In it, she finds THE GHOST who betrayed her like a little fucking asshole just because his buddy Dane got killed. He tells her his whole sad story. That Dane was like, his friend and ally. He even gave Dane his “true name” (which is a big real. If anyone knows a faerie’s true name, they can command them to do anything). And then somehow Locke got his true name from Dane. And was commanding Ghost to do all these terrible things. Then Locke gave him to Maddock. So Jude is like SIIGHHH God damnit okay I’m getting out of here and taking you with me. I just need to get the key from Grimsen.

She goes BACK to camp, where Oriana is waiting for her like a huge dick. And she’s all like “You’re not Taryn, are you?” But thank god she doesn’t rat her out. Jude tells her why she was masquerading as Taryn, which Oriana totally understands (everyone in their family hated Locke) and the only reason she’s here is because Maddock FAERIE CHLOROFORMED HER.

Oriana agrees to write Vivi to come get Jude if Jude agrees to leave and never fucking come back to Faerie. Jude, being a lying liar, is like “yeah! Totes!”

So Jude goes to bed and plans on waking up before dawn and stealing the key from Grimsen to grab the Ghost and run. But she gets a hand thrown over her mouth in her sleep and elbows her assailant hard. Before she can STAB THEM, the Roach is laughing his ass off like “Jude, come on. It’s us.” And I nearly screamed and fell off the treadmill when she realizes that it’s CARDAN who has his hand over her mouth.

YAYYY!!! Cardan needs more screen time. I was so sad when Jude got kidnapped like god damnit. The high king is there in regular-people clothes. No crown. No gold eyeliner. He tells her that he knew where she was because he went to visit Vivi in the human world, which Jude cannot even picture and neither than I.

She’s like “Wtf did he even WEAR?” She tries to picture him sitting on their beat up couch next to Oak’s half eaten Lucky Charms. So apparently Vivi, Taryn, AND HEATHER are waiting for them in the forest. They bullied their way into the rescue operation by refusing to tell the high king where Jude was unless they could come.

Jude, difficult as usual, is like “Neat. You can’t rescue me yet. I need to free the Ghost from his torture cave first.”

Cardan is like “Can you FOR ONCE just let someone RESCUE you without being DIFFICULT?”

She’s like “No. Help me get this key from Grimsen.”

And he says “Okay.” (Whispers: “I love you so much”)

So the Roach, Jude, and Cardan sneak into Grimsen’s forge to get the key. Jude totally doesn’t notice how good Cardan is at sneaking around, nor how good he looks in those pants.

Before they left, the Roach told Cardan he could come on the dangerous mission if he promised to leave if they got discovered. Cardan is like Oh my god FIIIINE why does everyone make me promise thiiiings. Stupid fucking promise magic.

He also made a promise to Jude that if she returned with him to Elfhame, and told him what she needs to tell him, he’ll un-exile her. So Jude is like HOT DAMN YES.

They break into the forge, get the key, and immediately trip a booby trap. Some darts fly out of the wall and Cardan instinctively protects Jude with his cloak that is basically bulletproof. They look at each other as if they’re surprised at this, because they are having a little fight where they can’t figure out who betrayed who, if at all. GOD THESE KIDS ARE SO STUPID I LOVE THEM.

Well the romantic moment gets ruined because the Roach is down with a dart. Cardan carries him and Jude is like “BRB I GOTTA TELL MY SISTERS TO LEAVE or they’ll get caught” (The knights are scrambling now in response to the alarm). Cardan, who is honor-bound to return to Elfhame is like “Fine. Fuck. Fine. Damnit.” And leaves his woman, who totally does NOT go to her sisters, but runs to the cave to get Locke. AND IN THE CAVE, SHE FINDS MADDOCK WAITING FOR HER.

She’s like “When did you figure out it was me?” and he says “Later than I would have liked.” — apparently it was the way she looked at the BOATS on the MAP in his tent that tipped him off, which is kind of a slight to Taryn more than anything lol

Jude refuses to surrender, and knowing all she has is a dagger, she runs off into the snowy woods and does a halfway decent job of defending herself, but ultimately gets stabbed in the stomach. Maddock is kind of surprised at this too, and he even seems like he’s going to spare her life until an ARROW flies out of nowhere and into his chest. Vivi, Taryn, and GRIMA MOG (not Heather) show up and threaten him. So they let him retreat back to his army.

Jude is like “Ya’ll I don’t feel so good.” And collapses, asking Taryn to stitch her side. While she’s on the ground, she remembers that she is a queen and tries to heal herself with the land… however one does that… but it totally works because it heals up enough. And when she stands up there are flowers everywhere, because that’s a fun side effect of being royal.

Maddock said he sent the Ghost after Cardan, so Jude leaves Grima Mog to protect her sisters and rushes off to the palace to stop “Garret” (his real name!) before he can kill Cardon.

She climbs up in the rafters, which is the Ghost’s favorite killing place, and is watching Cardan and everyone below when the Bomb climbs up in the rafters too, and AIMS AT JUDE. Jude realizes that Maddock tricked her, and sent her there to look like SHE is the one trying to kill Cardan. So she dodges the Bomb’s arrow and FALLS straight onto the banquet table.

There’s this cute part where Jude croaks “I lost your cloak.”

And Cardan is like “You’re a fucking filthy mortal liar.” In front of everyone, which stings. Jude thinks he believes she was trying to assassinate him too. We all know it’s cause he’s pissed she keeps putting herself in danger after promising she won’t.

The court is demanding her death, because they love dinner and a show, and Cardan says “DON’T TOUCH HER. That’s my wife.”

Jude passes out. Wakes up in Cardan’s bed with him being super sweet and tending to her. Passes out some more. Wakes up naked and gross so she takes a bath. Sees her sisters, who are super happy she is alive (I love the sisters, even stupid Taryn).

After they leave, Cardan arrives, which is sweet. Then the Bomb shows up with a medical tray, and says to him “you should leave.”

And he’s like “I’m not leaving. This is my room. And she is MY wife!”

Bomb: “I know, you keep telling EVERYONE. But I need to take our her stitches and you probably don’t want to see that.”

Jude goes “Maybe he wants to stay and watch me scream.”

And Cardan says “Maybe I do. Maybe one day you’ll do that for me.” And touches her head and LEAVES. AHHHHHH!!!!!

Jude gets her stitches out. Later, Cardan comes to fetch her because the Living Council wants to talk to her. But they take a detour to the rose garden for these two stupid idiots to work out their issues. Jude is like “I’M STILL PISSED THAT YOU EXILED ME.”

Cardan: “I wrote you letters?? Every day?? The contents of which were BEGGING YOU TO COME HOME. Also? I very explicitly said that you were banished until pardoned by the crown. You are also the crown. You could have pardoned yourself and come back any time you wanted.”

Jude slaps him lol. Smears his cute gold shit he wears around his cheekbones.

SHE IS PISSED. And again. They are so dumb. But I love them.

Cardan explains that he never thought she was capable of breaking? Or being sad? Or being defeated? In his eyes she’s like this immortal warrior demon that he wants to make love to all day. So he thought he was proposing a fun riddle for her to work out. Like Jude would show up any day now like “Hah! Good trick to make Orla think you were an ally. Let’s conquer the world, babe.” — instead Jude fell into a DEEP depression and ate fish sticks for a few months, all the while Cardan’s shitty MOM was keeping his letters from reaching her.

Jude feels embarrassed and foolish and in typical Jude fashion, does not handle this well.

She goes off on a tangent about how she’s not an immortal warrior demon, she’s SCARED all the time. Scared of this world and of powerlessness and of CARDAN. It’s a cute exchange and sweet things are said, but none of which are explicit. Will you idiots shut up and kiss already??? GAWD.

Jude goes and talks to Lady Asha who is languishing in her bed over the trauma of watching HER fall off the rafters. Jude basically hears this woman talk shit about her son who “was difficult to love” and sasses her something fierce, then leaves.

A knight comes and finds Jude and tells her that Nicasia is in the throne room with a bunch of soldiers. When Jude gets there, Cardan is holding her hand and speaking closely with her (OH SNAP) - but nothing weird is going on. They’re just friends and he’s comforting her because MADDOCK SHOT HER MOM WITH SOME KIND OF MAGIC BULLET. And she’s not dead but is in a coma. So Nicasia has to leave and make sure no one tries to unthrone her mom.

Jude puts two and two together that it was the Ghost that probably shot the sea queen. He’s out there running around being all crazy under Maddock’s control. Jude is interrupted from her council meeting by a messenger saying Taryn needs to meet with her immediately in Hallow Hall (which is weird).

So she gets up to leave but Cardan is like “I’ll come too.” and he looks at her so innocently (but also knowing this annoys her) and off they go TOGETHER in a carriage. There, they find Taryn in Balekin’s gross dungeon with the GHOST who she has trapped in a hole. He tells them it was HE who shot Orla, and we also learn the Ghost’s true name (Larkin Gorm Garrett).

The Ghost tries to kill Cardan, but Taryn uses his name to say “Hey, cut it out. You’re free of any previous orders.” and he’s just like “AUGH THANK GOD.” – Jude hands the Ghost aka Garrett over to the Bomb’s custody, and on the carriage ride back, Cardan is being adorable and asking Taryn about the human world. She tells him about slushies and gummy bears. You know, basic human stuff.

Cardan escorts the Ghost to the Bomb, but never comes to bed that night. Which makes Jude sad.

The next day, Randalin bursts in on Jude, and is like “Your dad is such a dick! And he’s being a dick because you’re the queen. Step down and make this easier on all of us.”

And Jude says “No, fuck you.”

And Cardan comes in and in the most elegant, royal way possible, drags his advisor into another room to threaten his life for insulting Jude. It’s very cute.

But Ranndal makes a good point. The lower courts are starting to assemble at the palace because word on the street is that Maddock is going to challenge Cardan to a duel for the crown, and they are either here to show their support or usher in a new king. It’s all very shaky right now.

But in true Faerie fashion, they’re like “Let’s throw a party to celebrate everyone coming into town!”

Jude wears a gold dress with like… battle-esque looking leather shoulder pads and chain-mail lookin accents. She looks like a badass, and this is made even better when Cardan gives a toast at the party that is like “Welcome everyone. To you I offer my honey and wine and to any traitors or oath breakers, I offer you my queen’s hospitality instead. The hospitality of knives.” and everyone is like hahahaha cheers (Jude included)-- meanwhile she’s sipping her cup like “Hah yes it’s true, I will murder you all without batting a eyelash.”

Heather and Vivi are also there with Oak and having a good time considering they have some stupid deal where when they go back to the human world, they’re going to break up and Vivi will erase Heather’s memory. It’s even sadder because Heather seems to be regretting it and Vivi seems to be all about it. Jude is like… when I’m done with this whole “murdering my cat dad before he can murder my king husband” thing, this is next on the list.

OKAY.

OKAY….

So like… after the party…

Jude and Cardan go back to their bedroom, and this is the cutest fucking scene. They start making out and it’s getting super steamy up in there– Cardan picks her up against the wall, and the second she shows any sort of hesitation, he’s like “Okay we don’t have to.” (So sweet) But Jude is like no no, I’m cool. One sec. And she steps into her closet to compose herself, because she hates how inexperienced she is and how he’s an expert.

So this badass bitch gets completely naked, and steps out of the closet just to see the look on his face. Then she kneels and asks if this is what he imagined she’d be like when he thought about her obsessively in Hallow Hall. He’s like um yes. Exactly this. But with more groveling.

“So what did I do?” she asks.

“I imagined you telling me to do with you whatever I liked.” - he says, kind of mortified and scared of her. Like this is such a cute vulnerable moment from him where she has his heart in the palm of her hand. And yay Jude for discovering her sexy self, which like every other personality trait of hers, is also terrifying. Cardan’s into it though. And they have very sexy sex on the floor, which is fucking adorable and sweet and I love it so much, and I also know this means something TERRIBLE is about to happen.

(This was in Chapter 21 by the way!)

In Chapter 22, Maddock finally shows up. He wants to come parlay as per traditional fru fru tradition. The Bomb is like “How about this? How about I shoot him with an arrow?” and Cardan’s like “Nah, I’m not a coward. But I’m not going to duel him either.” – So everyone is just hanging out gathering for this like spectators. Even Vivi, Heather, and Oak who REALLY shouldn’t be there and I’m surprised everyone is okay with this. While they’re getting ready to have the parlay, Jude and Cardan have a little moment.

Before they go out there, Cardan comes out and says that he LOVES HER, and walks away all cool before she can reply, which drives her nuts. Jude realizes she’s loved him for a long time. She loved him before they got married. AUGH so SWEET.

Maddock comes in there like “Duel me. Lookit my big sword made by this master smith. I’ll even let you use it.”

Cardan’s like “I’m not going to fucking duel you, dude. And you better put that fucking sword down in my throne room, kay thanks.”

“Want me to put it down? Okay.” And he DRIVES the sword into the ground, which causes an earthquake so strong it makes the throne cut in half. Like this hundnreddsss year old throne that Cardan’s family has been protecting for generations, just destroyed. God Maddock is an ASSHAT.

Then Maddock starts spewing his shit like “Do you think your people actually care about you? Like your stupid murdered family ever cared about you? The only reason you accepted the crown was because you so desperately wanted to be accepted by your family. Your subjects don’t even like you. My army is super loyal. You suck. DUEL ME OR I KILL THE SEA QUEEN with my magic bullet that moves if I tell it to.”

Cardan has this interesting introspective moment and says “A king is not his crown. You’re right that loyalty or love shouldn’t be forced. But Elfhame shouldn’t be won or lost on a wager, either. You fuckin weird bloodthirsty old man.”

Cardan CRACKS THE BLOOD CROWN IN HALF and is like “The people shouldn’t swear loyalty to a crown. They should support the king they want to support. Your choice is your own.”

And boom, democracy is born in Elfhaim.

The folk are bowing their heads and nodding, totally on board the Cardan train. But then Grimsen interrupts everything by FREAKING OUT about his precious crown and how upset he is that it’s broken.

Jude remembers that everything Grimsen makes is cursed, just as Cardan’s eyes turn black, and the roses over the throne turn black, and his eyes start fucking BLEEDING BLACK and before she knows it, her adoring husband from the night before TURNS INTO A GIANT FUCKING BLACK SNAKE!!!!! *Pterodactyl scream* NNOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Grimsen says “It will poison the land. No true love’s kiss will stop it. No riddle will fix it. Only death.”

Maddock jumps on the opportunity and wants to kill the snake. Jude is like the FUCK you will. Her army seizes Maddock and his little posse. Snake Cardan bites and kills Grimsen, which kind of solidifies that his brain isn’t in there, because Cardan is very much against murdering people. It’s just pure chaos up in the throne room. There’s a cute part where Oak tries to save his mother with a little toy sword. Everyone runs away and the snake gets stabbed a little by Maddock but is okay, and it curls around the throne as Jude is dragged out the room.

Babygirl has herself a much-deserved panic attack. Grima Mog is like “Get a hold of yourself” and Jude says “I fucking will. I’m going to stand up. I’m going to be okay in a minute.” Grima is like “I know you will be.”

I like Grima Mog. I like her even though she’s like a bloodthirsty cannibal. What is it with this book and making me really like murderers?????

Alright so Jude immediately swings into badass bitch mode. Calls the Bomb. Tells her to go get intel on who out there is plotting her assassination and who is vying for the crown. She says not to ask questions. Murder anyone who looks like they’re trying to murder her. The Bomb is like yep. Roger that.  Calls her sister in. Tells Taryn she’s good at decorating things (like Locke’s house of debauchery). Asks her to make up a room to act as a throne room where she can talk to people and be scary and intimidating. Taryn is like yep. On it. She tells Grima Mog she is the new army general, because she doesn’t like the guy Cardan chose.

Jude gets all set up in her makeshift throne room since the real one is currently being guarded by a huge fucking snake. She sees the Living Council in there and starts planning on what to do about Maddock and his stupid fucking army and all of the courts that are currently splintering off trying to figure out who to be loyal to. She calls in Baphen and tells him to consult the stars for a way to cure Cardan. The Living Council is like “we should just kill the snake” and Jude is like “We’re not fucking killing the snake. Focus on Maddock.” So they talk that out and rally the troops.

Eventually the snake gets out lol it gets through the crack in the floor, and then runs around the land for a little bit doing snake stuff.

Wherever it touches rots and turns black. And people have gotten it in their heads that whoever slays the snake gets to be king, so it keeps getting attacked and killing indiscriminately. But eventually, it comes BACK because apparently the throne room is its den now. It curls around the broken throne and it’s snowing in there. The weather outside is also nuts and thunderstormy and hailing.

After her meeting, Jude enters the throne room and tries her hand at talking to the snake. She tries to see if there’s any recognition in its golden eyes, but there doesn’t seem to be. She tries to call on the land to heal him, but nothing happens. There’s a sweet part where she says out loud “Take my crown. Take my power. Take whatever you need, just heal him. Please.” — and even though the land or magic doesn’t answer her, I hope somewhere in there, Cardan heard her.

Okay so the prophecy said… that if Cardan ever came into the crown, the throne and the crown would be destroyed. But the prophecy also said that only if his blood is spilled, would a truly perfect leader emerge. I THINK this means that Jude is eventually going to have to slay the snake.

Jude hangs out in the snowy throne room with the snake for like HOURS until the Bomb comes. The snake has gotten used to Jude’s presence and doesn’t seem to want to attack her, so that’s something. It’s still impossible to tell if Cardan is in there though. I mean it doesn’t react to his name.

Anyway the Bomb says “Hi. I killed a ton of people that were plotting against you. You wanna come out of the snake room now?” And Jude says “Okay.” Just as Grima Mog comes back with word that Maddock wants to talk.

So they move her whole complicated throne set up outside because Jude is livid and doesn’t want these people anywhere near her fucking home and her cursed husband. I don’t know if I mentioned it earlier, but the people from the Court of Teeth are weird. They’re like ice faeries and they have this little girl who is their queen, but she’s just a puppet for her parents who keep her on a literal bridle. When they get there, the bridle is gone, but her skin is all scarred from where it was. And she’s in these horrible chains that look just as painful. Maddock shows up with that lovely family and isn’t wearing any armor.

He’s like “Hey. I never wanted to kill you. I actually quite like you. You wanna strike a deal? I’ll give you this bridle so you can control your snake husband. It was made by Grimsen and gives you complete control over whoever you want to restrain. That way you can remain queen and make sure your snake stops running around rotting the earth and killing anyone who tries to pierce its apparently impervious scales.”

Jude is like “You threw a bunch of men at it and figured out it’s unstoppable, didn’t you? What are you up to?”

“Make Oak marry this tiny icy abused child and you get the bridle.” Maddock says.

AND TO MY SHOCK AND HORROR, Jude is like “Okay.” — well she agrees to accepting the bridle on the terms that the war should be put on hold and it’s better for everyone if there isn’t a deadly toxic snake running around.

She doesn’t agree to the marriage. She agrees to have a bridling… event? Where she is going to attempt to bridle the snake, and if she wins then yay. If she fails and it kills her, then the armies are all gathered and can duke it out. She thinks Maddock is trying to rule through her the way she ruled through Cardan. Oh gosh I hope she’s up to  something and not actually considering putting that thing on the snake. That night, she throws a wadded up paper into the ocean that says “If you ever loved him, help me.”

Jude and the Bomb have a sweet convo and Jude goes to try to help the Roach, who is still poisoned. When Jude sees him, she’s horrified to find that he’s not just sleeping, he’s having like… nightmares. She tries to heal him, but the earth magic won’t come. The Ghost, who is part of the gang again (yay!) tells her not to force it, just let it come. AND IT DOES! The roach is back and confesses his love to the Bomb and it’s fucking adorable.

Jude takes the bridle to that old hag lady that once tried to trick Cardan into marrying her daughter. Now she’s good I guess haha. The hag tells her that if she followed the instructions Lord Nell or whatever his name is gave her, and tied her hair around the bridle, then she would have been bound to the snake as well. Basically, it was a trick that would have trapped both Jude and snake Cardan into servitude. Thank god she found this out.

Jude also visits Heather in the library who is researching snake-themed faerie tales looking for a clue. Heather tells her that she struck a deal with Vivi that when they go back to the human world, her memories will be erased. But Vivi will have to meet her again and win back her love. But do it properly this time and be honest about the faerie shit from the get-go. And if Heather falls in love with her despite that, she’ll get all her memories back. That’s super freaking sweet I love them.

There’s like a banquet before the snake bridling.

And Jude is doing her best to be a badass queen and make speeches, but she’s so nervous. She gets through it though. Her and Nicasia have this super sweet moment (after Kaye, Roiben’s lady punches her) where Nicasia is like “I know you’re a bloodthirsty monster who is only using Cardan for his power, but please save him. I beg of you.”

And Jude actually CRIES with her and says “Tell me the riddle I must solve. Tell me what to slay. What to sacrifice. And it’s done. I’ll do anything to free him. I promise you.” And they just stand there, two enemies, crying together and realizing how much they love this poor cursed snake boi.

Taryn and Vivi find a chest with some badass silver armor made for a woman, so Jude wears that to the big “snake bridling event” that is happening out in the woods somewhere.

The snake is out. Doing it’s thing. Turning the land to shit. The armies are gathered on either side, and everyone is watching Jude and waiting to see what happens. Will she bridle the snake or will she be eaten? It’s growing bigger too, so by now, it could swallow a car.

Jude has some internal monologue… where she actually wonders if bridling him is the right thing to do. She has no idea how to break the curse. This way, Cardan wouldn’t have to die. He’d be trapped as a poisonous snake forever, but at least he’d be by her side. But she also remembers what Cardan said before he got cursed. That no one should be forced to swear their love or allegiance. That’s the kind of thing you should decide for yourself. And she remembers that Cardan said something along the lines of “I was on my way to becoming Balekin. Becoming a monster. If I ever go down that path again, I want it to be you that ends me.” — SO SHE CUTS OFF THE SNAKE’S HEAD.

HE DEAD. There is blood EVERYWHERE.

And the second she does this, fighting breaks out. It’s just a bloodbath all around while Jude is in shock. Maddock’s army gets defeated because Nicasia shows up with the sea. But instead of trying to kill Jude, Maddock comes to help her up.

He tells her “You’ve already won. Look.” And turns her around to the snake where a bright golden light has emerged. And out of it steps naked-ass Cardan covered in blood and looking regal as hell.

“Only when his blood is shed will a great ruler emerge”

BOOM. He calls for the fighting to end and Jude runs and hugs him. They hang on to each other and it’s so sweet. THE BEST REUNION.

Someone literally is like “Welcome back, King! Here, you want this cloak?”

And Cardan goes “Nah. I haven’t worn clothes in days.”

And literally rides buck ass naked in the carriage, covered in blood. HAH. Like. Yeah nudity is a thing in Faerie world but alrighty. Here we go. Cardan is back and he’s not messing around.

Everybody gets a bath. The general mood is SO HAPPY and celebratory. There’s a big ole banquet where Cardan and Jude slip away to the pretty glowing mushroom room behind the throne (which he fixed with his magic and split into 2 chairs). They finally have a moment alone, and Jude blurts out “I love you.”

He’s like “You don’t have to say that out of pity.” — which breaks my heart. That he STILL thinks she hates him so much that she seriously never will love him. And he’s CONTENT with just being with her even if it’s just for power.

But Jude launches into this awesome, fumbling speech about how she liked him ever since they went out together during the revelrie, and he helped her learn about each court and how to win them over. She says being around him is fun. And walks through their whole history together to help him understand that despite her being a cold, unfeeling monster, she loves him to pieces.

And they kiss. And it’s fucking adorable.

Jude also asks him what it was like being a snake and he says it was hella weird. He definitely had an animal brain. And was filled with fear and strife and a feral instinct to kill indiscriminately. But he says, he knew Jude. That’s why he was calm when she came and sat with him. He always knew her. (Awww!!!)

The next day they have a formal coronation. Apparently 2 people have never ruled together. It’s always a king or queen who has a bunch of consorts. But they get the ceremony where the court gets asked if they accept their king and queen, and everyone says yes because Cardan is awesome and Jude is scary. But they like scary. Then they get to give out BOONS to all of the people that were loyal or traitorous.

Grima Mog gets to keep the earth-shattering sword and continue to be general. Taryn gets cleared of all charges even though she totally fucking murdered her husband. The ice princess with the bridle scars gets freed and her parents get put in her custody. And she gives a creepy shark-toothed grin that makes Jude think maybe her parents were keeping her in chains for a reason. But that’s their problem!

Maddock gets brought in and Jude sentences him to live in the mortal world for the rest of his days, and to forget the name he knows (she’s talking about the Ghost’s name). I like that her and Maddock totally come to this agreement. He’s like “Yeah, okay I lost. You’re absolutely a badass. I hate losing but I’m also pretty proud”. I think he was really sad when he thought he killed her. So this is a better punishment than getting executed for sure. Oriana decides to go with him and Oak is excited because he loves the mortal world and now his parents are going to live there too. YAY!

I love how this book ends. It ends with Jude and Cardan flying home with Vivi and Oak to the real world. And they find Cardan some normal clothes (a tshirt over his black pants) and they have a cute little party at Vivi’s apartment.

Heather is there and puts up a sign that is like “Congrats Newlyweds!” And says “Vivi has told me some wild things about ya’ll!” Jude just hugs her. They also got them a cake with little gummy snakes sprinkled on it. And Oak takes them to pick up pizza.

Heather also got everyone paper crowns, and there’s this cute part where Cardan tilts his paper crown at an angle, like he used to wear the Blood Crown and it makes Jude laugh. The book ends with them toasting to a new future, and pizza, and friends, and Cardan says “To scheming great schemes.”

I love that this is where we leave them. In casual real world clothes wearing paper crowns and eating gummy snakes.

Boy, I loved this book. I love the world building. I love the slow burn romance. The sexy times. I love that Holly Black makes me like and cheer for this cold hard bitch Jude. I love that Cardan, who at one time was SO NOT LIKEABLE it was CRAZY became one of my favorite characters in fiction.

I loved when that heel turn happened, when he was a prisoner of the spies, and was so cute and charming. We all fell in love with him at the same time Jude did.

Then we spent 2 books watching Jude be a complete idiot and be the last one in the world to realize how much he loved her. And how much she loved him. She loved him more than power, which was her single solitary goal this whole time.

This mortal girl overtook a bunch of magical immortals and it was completely believable and fun and baffling. Damn I can see why Holly Black is so highly regarded. That was SO GOOD. I am going to need a few days to digest this.

I just keep thinking of them all happy and celebrating together over pizza and paper crowns. EEEEE!!!

Deadass Rating: 9.5/10

[writeforfandoms]

Move Here and Move There

Find my masterlist

This is a direct sequel to She Moves Through The Fair, so if you haven’t read that yet, please do so first. 

One year later, you and Jack are back at the fair for more fun and shenanigans. This time, you get interrupted. 

Word count: 2.7k

Jack Daniels x f!reader

Warnings: Baby goats, fluff, powdered sugar, kissing. Also date interruptions. 

One year later and you found yourself back at the fair. Exactly one year later, right down to the day. But there was one big difference this time. 

"Here ya are, darlin'." Jack smiled as he handed you a water bottle. 

"Thank you." You took your water bottle and took a drink, currently standing off to the side out of the way of traffic. "Where do we want to go first?"

"Goats?" He suggested with a playful smile. 

You grinned. "Sure. Let's go see the goats. Just like old times." 

Jack chuckled. "Old times being last year." 

"Things were very different last year." 

"That is true. They're much better this year." 

You smiled and took hold of his hand, walking easily with him down the main thoroughfare to the animal area. 

"This way," Jack murmured to you, tugging you gently through the door. "I promise if you want, I'll let you say hi to every animal later. I got a surprise for you first." 

"A surprise?" You couldn't help but smile, more than a little smitten, as Jack led you through the animal house and to the far corner. 

"You'll see." Jack glanced back over his shoulder at you with a big smile, eyes sparkling, Stetson firmly in place. Your Stetson, the one you'd borrowed way back when, was settled on your head still. You laughed a little as Jack pulled you along with him. 

You recognized the rancher from a year ago, the one who had let you in to play with the pygmy goats. Your smile widened, and you kind of hoped you'd get to play with the pygmy goats again. 

"Roger," Jack greeted, tipping his hat to the rancher and holding out his free hand to shake. "How are ya?"

"Oh, holding together." Roger smiled. "Ma'am."

"Hi." You smiled at Roger, excited. 

"I brought all three with me," Roger said to Jack, grinning. "Figured you can pick them up after the fair is over."

"Sure," Jack agreed. He ushered you ahead of him as Roger opened a section of fence for the two of you, once again letting you in with the goats. 

"Pick up what?" You asked, puzzled, even as a baby goat drew your attention. 

"This is your surprise," Jack told you, grinning widely. "Baby goats." 

You stopped and stared at him, eyes wide, mouth hanging open a little. "What?"

"The three babies are yours," Jack continued, starting to look a little nervous. He shrugged, just a bit, and stuck his thumbs in his belt loops. "I've got a place all set up for them. And you did say you wanted some."

"You remember that?" You had thought that a throwaway comment, an idle dream. Not something that Jack would remember and make a reality for you a year later. 

"Course I do." His smile softened a little. "If you don't want 'em--"

"No!" You shook your head quickly, crouching down to greet the three babies. "No I want them. I just." You laughed a little, disbelieving. "You are absolutely incredibly incorrigible." 

Jack chuckled, crouching next to you. "But I can still make you smile," he murmured. 

Your smile widened at that and you continued playing with the little goats. They were too damn cute - one of them fell over their own feet trying to bonk into you, and sent you into a helpless laughing fit. 

After spending enough time with the goats that you wore them out, you and Jack left, after Jack assured Roger they could set a pickup time and date later. 

"Do you like your surprise?" Jack asked as the two of you washed your hands. 

"I really, really do." You beamed at him. "You're absolutely still incorrigible, but oh my gosh. You bought me goats." 

"I'll buy you more than goats," Jack murmured, wiggling his eyebrows at you suggestively. You couldn't help but laugh, flicking water at him playfully. 

You did freeze when you heard someone call your name. You turned to find your friend Kim walking over to you, pulling a man behind her. Kim was the friend who had ditched you last year. 

"Oh, hi," you said with a polite smile. You hadn't really talked to her much - she had been very busy, and you could see why now. 

"I didn't expect to see you here!" She hugged you before pulling back, and her gaze went over your shoulder to Jack. Her eyes lit up with glee. "And who's this?"

"Kim, this is Jack. Jack, my friend Kim." Your smile felt a little forced. 

"Nice to meet you," Jack said with a charming smile. 

"This is my honey, Sean! You haven't met Sean yet have you?" Kim smiled at you, as buoyant and happy as ever. 

"I have not. It's nice to meet you." You smiled and nodded to Sean. "It really was a surprise to see you, Jack and I are just headed off to get a snack." 

"Oh so are we!" Kim beamed, tucking her hand into your arm. Your skin crawled, just a little. You liked Kim, sure, but the two of you had been growing apart slowly over the past several years. Clearly she had been too busy with her new beau to bother with you. 

"Oh I don't want to interrupt your day," you deferred, glancing back at Jack for help. Jack just shrugged. 

"Oh but this will be fun! A cute double date!" Kim chirped. 

You held back your groan. That sounded like a terrible idea, honestly. But you couldn't think of a polite way to tell Kim that. You looked at Jack to see if he had any other plans. He just shook his head, just slightly. So you nodded. 

"Guess we can head this way to the food square, then," you agreed. Jack stepped closer and took your hand, giving it a comforting squeeze. 

Kim chattered on about work as your little group walked. Apparently she'd changed jobs to some entirely online work from home thing. You nodded along, letting her continue to chat. 

"I'll get us a table," Jack volunteered. When you looked at him, he winked at you with a little grin. 

"So what are you in the mood for?" Kim asked. But she didn't give you a chance to respond, instead continuing, "Oh they have Greek food! That looks good. Wanna try there?"

"Maybe," you hedges. "You two can go ahead and get your food, I'll take care of Jack and I." 

"Sure! See you at the table!" Kim bounced off, taking her boyfriend with her. 

You let your shoulders drop for a minute. Kim was an old friend, one you'd known for a long time, but one who was honestly rather exhausting. You really hadn't expected to see her - normally outings with her had to be planned weeks in advance. 

Then you took a deep breath and straightened again. You might as well get some food, and then make the most of today. You could have fun with Kim and her beau, and then make the rest of the day with Jack. It would be fine. 

You picked up a snack for yourself and Jack, and made your way to the table. Kim and her boyfriend were already seated there, and she was chatting away with Jack. Or at Jack. You couldn't quite tell if he was really paying attention or just being polite. 

"Here you go, love," you murmured to Jack, setting the plate down and sitting next to him. 

"Have you two been together long?" Kim smiled, looking between the two of you. You were glad you hadn't taken a bite yet. 

"About a year," you murmured, unable to keep from smiling, just a little. 

"Oh yeah? How come you haven't told me anything before?" Kim pouted.

"I did, I mentioned I was seeing someone a few months ago." You shrugged, unconcerned. 

Kim was silent for a moment. "You did? Huh. I don't remember that." 

"It's no big deal." You shrugged it off and took a big bite of food so you wouldn't have to talk. 

For a few minutes, there was silence at the table as you all ate. It was a pretty good snack, but no funnel cake. You couldn't help but look at Jack with a sly little smile at the thought of funnel cake. He caught your eye and returned the smile. 

"Have you done any shopping yet? I was thinking of going over to do my shopping after this. We could go together! Do what we normally do." Kim smiled at you, eager and excited. This was typical - so long as things went her way, anyway. 

"Well…"

"Sounds like fun," Jack interjected with an easy smile. You sighed but didn't actually contradict him. 

It didn't take long to get the table cleared from your snack, and Kim tucked her hand in your arm, once again chattering away with very little input from you. Honestly, she was a bit exhausting, and you weren't sure why you were still here. You'd been looking forward to spending the day with Jack, not with Kim. 

But shopping was not bad. Kim was easily distractible until she wanted to make a purchase, but you made note of a few things that you wanted to go back for. 

Jack even made things easier, walking next to you and holding your hand. Normally he didn't shy away from PDA, but he knew you were less comfortable with it. So he didn't make a big deal of it. He held your hand, and he took your bags for you (with a wink and a smile that both left your heart fluttering and reminded you of a year ago). 

"Relax," he murmured in your ear when Kim dashed on ahead to look at some pillows. "You're not being tortured."

"Suppose not," you agreed with a sigh, trying to loosen some of the tension in your shoulders. 

"Just play nice for a little longer," Jack soothed, squeezing your hand gently. "If she doesn't relent in another hour, I'll make our excuses and we can leave." 

You pouted. This was supposed to be a date, you weren't supposed to leave yet. But you nodded easily enough. "That's fair," you grumbled. 

Jack smiled and snuck a quick kiss to the space just below your ear, just to watch some of your tension melt away under his care. 

You couldn't even be mad, could only smile, a little helpless and a lot smitten. 

Shopping, fortunately, only lasted a couple hours before Kim called a halt. 

"Whew, look at the time!" Kim made a show of looking at her phone for the time. "This was fun! It was really great to see you, but we have to get going."

"Of course, I understand," you agreed with a smile, although you couldn't help but be relieved. 

"We'll have to get together soon!" Kim grabbed you for a hug, loose and a little off. 

"Sure." You patted her back a couple times and she let go of you. With one last twiddle of her fingers, she and her boyfriend were gone. 

You slumped, and Jack was next to you, keeping you steady. 

"That the friend who ditched you last year?" Jack murmured, his fingers stroking along your waist where he was holding you steady. 

"Yup."

"I can see why you only go once a year with her." Jack chuckled. "Can't say I was thrilled with the interruption to our day." 

"Neither was I," you grumbled. "But that's done now. No more talking about Kim for today."

"Well, darlin', if you still have some energy I have one more thing I would like to do." Jack smiled at you, a little mischievous. 

You perked up, looking over at him. "One more thing?"

"Mmhm." Jack slid his hand to the small of your back, gently encouraging you to move forward. Curious, you obeyed, moving where he directed you. 

It seemed, for a few minutes, that he was taking you the long way. You left the vendor tents behind, and then looped around the still-bustling food stalls. 

For a minute, you thought he was leading you back to the animals. Then he took a turn, stopping in front of a table. 

"Wait here for me?"

"Sure." 

Jack grinned and kissed you, quick and sweet, and then he vanished back into the fair. 

You turned in a slow circle, placing yourself in the fair. Your heart stuttered as you realized where you were. 

This was the same table that you'd sat at last year with him. When he'd kissed you for the first time. Your lips curled into a smile.

"Here you are, darlin'." Jack set a funnel cake down in front of you, sitting next to you with your thighs touching. "Can't not have one." He winked at you. 

You laughed, delighted. "Sounds fair to me," you agreed. 

You took a bite, powdered sugar on your fingers. And things quickly devolved into stealing bites of sugary fried dough, followed by sugary kisses. Once, you heard giggles from a pair of girls passing you by. You and Jack locked eyes… and devolved into helpless laughter yourselves. 

Finally, Jack pushed the last bit of funnel cake to you, licking his fingers clean with an over the top wink at you. You snorted and hid your giggles in the last bits of fried dough. 

Then the funnel cake was gone, and the fair was getting quieter momentarily as the early crowd left, the late crowd not yet arrived. You looked at Jack, eyes warm in the sunlight, and smiled. 

"It's been a pretty good day," you murmured, taking his hand and twining your fingers around his. 

"It has," he agreed, squeezing gently. "Bet I can make it better, though."

"Oh?"

"Mmhm." Jack leaned forward, capturing your lips in a slow kiss that still tasted of sugar. This time, he didn't pull back until you did, leaving you a little out of breath. His lips curved, more than a little smug, and he murmured one word: "Goats." 

This time, the grin came completely unbidden, smitten and joyous. "I can't believe you bought me goats." 

"Excuse you, I bought us goats," he teased.

"You totally bought me goats." You couldn't have kept the glee from your voice if you tried, and you didn't try. 

"Just because they're your favorite--" 

"And they were my surprise."

"And they were a surprise," Jack continued, grinning. "They're gonna be on the property."

"You'll show me tomorrow?"

"Sure will." 

"I still can't believe you. If I said I wanted a horse would I come back to find one?"

"Nah." Jack paused for a moment. "I'd take you with to pick out a horse."

You tipped your head back and laughed. Your hat tumbled off your head and Jack caught it, replacing it for you. 

"Anything else you want to do, sweetheart?"

You paused to consider his question, taking a look around. "I need to make one stop at the vendors, then I'm done," you agreed. 

Jack nodded agreeably and picked up your bags again before you could protest. His free hand settled on your lower back again, guiding you back to the vendor stalls. 

Now for the tricky part. You sent him on a goose chase to find more beef jerky from the place last year. And then you dove on the vendor you'd spotted with Kim, quickly purchasing a gift for Jack. 

A pair of handmade porcelain cows, salt and pepper shakers, one with a flower behind her ear. 

You tucked them in a bag and smiled to yourself. You'd give them to Jack later. 

"Ready, darlin'?" Jack asked when he spotted you, hand going to catch yours. 

"Ready." You smiled and squeezed his hand. The two of you walked down the main street of the fair, all the way back to Jack's car. 

Honestly, Kim ditching you last year had been the best thing to happen to you, and you smiled all the way home, hand still twined with Jack's.

--

Taglist:  @oonajaeadira @green-socks @grogusmum @quica-quica-quica @queridopascal @littlemisspascal @fandom-blackhole @pedrocentric @sarahjkl82-blog @cannedsoupsucks @liviiii98 @adriiibell @pbeatriz @kiizhikehn-cedar @withakindheartx @linkpk88 @janebby @anditsmywholeheart @ohheyitsokay @amneris21 @recklessworry @the-feckless-wonder @myguiltypleasures21 @javierpinme @eri16 @idreamofboobear @pintsizemama @pedrostories @kirsteng42 @alexxavicry @elegantduckturtle @pjkimrn @jaime1110 @trash-dino-5000 @mswarriorbabe80 @lowlights @magikfanatic @luz-introvertida @hb8301 @saradika @bruxasolta @seasonschange-butpeopledont @princessxkenobi @chaoticgeminate @thirddeadlysin @beskarprincessjenny @evyiione @eri @hotchlover @bowtiesandsandshoes​ @princessxkenobi​ @scorpio-marionette​

[minty-mumbles]

Foundlings

Summary: What if the Links weren't born? What if they just... appeared one day?

Author's Note: This was inspired by some asks on @tortilla-of-courage's blog

(Read it on Ao3 Here)

~~~

Everyone on Skyloft had a profound bond with their loftwing. Everyone. They would trust their birds with their life, and more significantly, the lives of their children, if they had any. It wasn’t a rare sight to see your neighbor’s loftwing watching after their child, or to see a loftwing carrying a wayward child back home.

And, although Skyloft is a small island, not everyone knows each other.

So they can’t be blamed, really, that they didn't notice right away that all the loftwings on the island were playing hot potato with a small child.

They only really started to notice when the headmaster of the Knight’s academy found his loftwing looking after not just his own daughter, but a young boy as well.

Before he could question it, or pick up the boy, another loftwing swooped in, snatching the boy up by the back of his tunic. The toddler didn’t seem to mind, squealing in excitement as the bird took him up to the roof.

Gaepora still might not have thought anything about it, except that he knew for a fact that that loftwing’s rider had died a year ago. That’s why the bird was here. It was still mourning its partner, and it was better for it to be around other loftwings. The communal nests for the loftwings at the academy were perfect for that.

And, as far as he knew, the loftwing hadn’t picked a new rider. So whose child was that?

~

After a good two or three weeks of searching for the child’s parents and simultaneously trying to get the boy away from the loftwings, they were still empty-handed.

The search for the parents was futile. Nearly everyone on the island knew about the boy now, and most had even seen their own loftwings carrying the boy around. No parent had stepped forward.

On the other hand, no one could actually manage to get the kid away from the loftwings. It was rare for the birds to completely disobey their riders, but in this, they seemed resolute. The boy would be staying with the loftwings, at least for now.

Gaepora pinched the bridge of his nose, looking at his daughter, who was currently giggling with the yet unmanned boy on his own loftwings back. This boy was going to be nothing but trouble, he could already feel it.

~~~

The master smith of Castle town wasn’t a slouch at hand-to-hand combat. He had never been formally trained in the subject. But he was a smith. Being a smithy was very physically taxing. He may be getting on a bit in years, but he could still swing a hammer and withstand the blazing heat of the forge.

So when he entered his shop in the morning and heard rustling behind the counter he kept his lockbox behind, he did not run to call the town guards. They wouldn’t even get here in time, and Smith could deal with the thief by himself.

When he rounded the corner of the counter with a shout, what he found was not what he expected. Instead, he found a little kid. Really, he couldn't be more than two or three. Instead of the lock box, he had been rooting around in a jar of cookies that Smith kept in the shop for the rather common occasion he got the munchies in the middle of the day.

The child was watching him with wide eyes, his gaze not wavering. He had far too much of an intelligent gaze for a two year old who had literally gotten caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Smith looked around, foolishly hoping that the child’s mother would pop out from behind one of the shelves to claim the him.

No such luck, of course. Cursing his bleeding heart, Smith picked up the child and, hanging a sign on the door to tell his customers he was closed for the day, made his way home.

~~~

The Great Deku Tree was very old. He liked to take naps, which sometimes ended up lasting months. And he forgot things sometimes.

But he was pretty sure he wasn't actually asleep for more than a few hours this time. And he was sure he would have remembered this.

There was a child laying between his roots. An infant, wrapped in swaddling clothes, nestled in a bed of fallen leaves.

The Tree didn’t recognize him.

He would know if this was a Kokiri child. It was not. This child was as Hylian as they came. And yet, somehow, he had ended up here. Deep in the lost woods, where no adult could reach. At the very least, the fairies or the Kokiris would have woken him if there had been an intruder.

The Tree took his time examining the child, looking for any clues to his origins. He found none.

After a while, the baby started to fuss. The Deku Tree hummed, calling for a fairy to go fetch Saria. She was a responsible young lass. She would make sure the boy was well looked after.

He stayed contemplating the child long after he had been taken away by the Kokiri. That child would be one to make note of.

~~~

They were calling him the Hero of the Wind, now. She had smiled when she heard that, but to her, he would always be Link. She gave him that name, after all. She had named him after the previous hero when she found him. There had been no mother in sight to give her a different name, after all.

She hadn’t known where the baby had come from. When she had gone on an early morning walk one day, it had led to her finding a woven basket with a wailing infant inside it, washed up on the shore.

No one on Outset Island had a child this young, or was even pregnant. But Hylia would be damned if she left the babe there. Besides, she was lonely. Her husband had died a few years back, and her daughter had left Outset, rarely visiting. She wouldn’t mind someone to share her house with.

There were rumors. Of course there were. Outset island was a calm and peaceful place, but that didn’t mean all the people there were kind. Suddenly acquiring a child out of nowhere was suspicious. People called her a witch behind her back, not so subtly accusing her of stealing the child.

She had claimed that her daughter had come back from sailing to give Link to his grandmother, but no one had actually seen the young woman do so, so there were always skeptics.

And there was indeed a good reason that no one had seen her come back. It was because the woman hadn’t. No one but Granny would ever know the truth of it, she had vowed to herself.

But, eventually, the excitement died down. Link was a sweet boy. And, well, he had his Granny’s nose, after all, and his mother’s bright golden hair.

(And a few years after that, when she found Aryll on her front porch, surrounded by seagulls, people said much the same about the little girl.)

~~~

The Hero of Legend had humble beginnings, just like most of his brethren. Before he had started his journeys, he had grown up on a farm, looked after by his uncle. In truth, though, said uncle had no relation to him at all.

The nearby village thought he was just an orphan.

It wasn’t unusual. Families were torn apart often these days, sometimes literally, meeting brutal ends at the hands of monsters. Many times, this left children to wander, with no one to care for them. Sometimes, families would take them in and care for them like they were their own.

It was a bit odd that Link's Uncle would do so, as he had no wife to help him in raising a child. But after all, he had no wife, and never showed any signs of looking for one. Perhaps he wanted someone to look after him as he grew older, or just someone to share his house with. It must get lonely, all by himself in that huge farm, so far from town.

In truth, he couldn’t have done anything else, except take the kid in. He had been sucked in by the big eyes set into the sweet face the first time he set eyes on the boy.

The boy never made any mention of his previous family. But, thought his uncle, that was probably normal. Whatever happened to him before he found his way here couldn’t have been pleasant.

It was probably normal not to want to speak of it. And besides, there were apples that needed to be picked, animals to be fed, grain to be cut. There would be time for talking later. For now, he would focus on teaching Link the proper way to hold a cucco without being mauled.

~~~

Legend had it that the Hero of Hyrule started his adventure in a cave. What the Legends don’t tell is that he also started his life in that cave.

In his era, monsters roamed nearly everywhere. There were a few exceptions. One of these was a small cave. It was hidden deep in a forest, and generally ignored by all who passed it. Most who saw it assumed it was too small to be a proper shelter for anyone.

It was this assumption that made it the perfect spot for its inhabitants to hide. A group of fairies had stumbled across the cave, and claimed it for their own. It was undisturbed by the bigger creatures of the world, and it was the perfect size for them.

It was deep in this cave, soaked in fae magic, that this group of fairies found a tiny child. Or more accurately, he found them. When he wiggled through the crack of the cave opening and saw them, he giggled, clapping his hands.

They were uncertain at first. What was a young hylian doing out here? It shouldn't be possible. Where had he even come from? He couldn’t have made it all the way out here by himself.

Being naturally helpful creatures, they tried to search for the small one’s parents, but came up empty-handed. All the while, the child played with the strands of magic they conjured to entertain him.

Fairies have a poor sense of time. They just kept searching for the child’s parents. They fed him when he was hungry, and sang him to sleep when he was tired. They didn’t even notice that the child was growing up.

~~~

Wolves are not a common animal to see in Ordon. Generally, they preferred to stay away from the village.

There were exceptions. If there was a harsh winter, wolf packs might approach the village, looking for the easy meals the goats presented. If a wolf was sick, they might wander closer in confusion as well.

So when Uli looked out the window, and saw a large golden wolf in the middle of the goat pen, she was understandably shocked. The wolf looked healthy. Its fur coat was glossy, and even from this distance, Uli could see muscles rippled under its coat when it moved. There was no sickness in this creature. It was the height of summer. The game in the forest should be plentiful. There was no real reason for it to go after her goats.

Looking closer, she could see that the wolf was standing over something, likely one of her goats. She cursed, gripping the bow from the mantle that they kept for situations just like this, and exited the house.

When the wolf saw that he was being approached, he calmly turned away. Moving at a quick pace, he left behind the prize he was guarding, and returned to the edge of the forest. When he reached the forest, he turned to look back at her. With what looked disturbingly like a nod, he disappeared into the woods.

After watching for a few moments to make sure the wolf wouldn’t return, Uli turned to inspect the damage to the herd.

Instead of finding a dead goat, she found a small bundle of blankets. Filled with curiosity, she knelt, moving the blankets aside cautiously. What she found was the last thing she thought she would.

A toddler, curled up and sleeping peacefully, as if they hadn’t just been two feet away from a wolf.

Well. What was she to do with this, then?

~~~

There is no record of the Hero of Warriors from before the War. Most people from his era assume that it’s because he came from a little town in the middle of nowhere. A farm boy, a nobody who crawled up the ranks to become a war hero, a captain.

In reality, the Hero of Warriors was a rather special case. He was made for war. He was a savior of his people, just like his brethren, but a child does not a warrior make. And a warrior is what was needed.

He strode into Hyrule castle, among the swarm of other young men who were reporting to the recruiters in the front hall. In the chaos, the one who greeted him neglected to ask where the young man was from, and Link did not offer the information.

From that point on, he was only called Link, with no surname on his record. Eventually, that became Commander Link, and then Captain Link.

No one ever questioned where he had come from. It was usually best not to think about those things too hard.

~~~

There was no one alive who remembered the Hero of the Wild’s origins. That was to be expected. It had been well over a century since he was born, after all.

The hero himself could not remember, and all those who had known him from before barely knew about his family.

The story of his birth was lost, or so it seemed.

The truth was that there was no story to be told. The hero’s family had been a small one. A knight who served in Hyrule’s military, his wife, and a little daughter. When the daughter had been born, the wife had nearly died. The doctor had warned them that another child would likely kill her.

So, though they dearly wanted a son to carry on their family’s name, and for his father to train him the way of the sword, they were content with their little girl.

Fate had other plans for them, though. One morning when the daughter was about a year old, they had just sat down for breakfast when there was a knock on the door.

The knight stood to answer the door. When he opened it, he did not find one of their neighbors, or a messenger from the castle, as he had expected, but a young boy, maybe five or six years old.

When asked what he needed, he simply said that he was their son.

He waltzed right in and plopped himself down at the table, pleased as punch with himself.

The knight and his wife looked at each other in amusement. This might as well happen. They could afford to feed an extra mouth for a meal or two. They could go look for the little one’s parents after they ate.

[oops-aquarius]

tainted kisses

summary: steve needs some relaxation, which you provide to him

warnings: smut (!!!!), praise kink, slight degradation kink, a little bit of angst cuz a hoe is sad, oral fixation (duh), slight dom/sub dynamics (?), mentions of sadness/depression, tiny mommy kink (like barely there)

pairing: steve rogers x reader

word count: 2.2k

note(s): not edited well at all, also i used a prompt generator to get the promt i used (which is below !!)

prompt: “baths or water (tubs or jacuzzis; hot springs; water houses or steam rooms; the ocean; swimming pools.”

kink: “Oral fixation or fetishization (lips, tongue, or whole mouth; french-kissing; licking; oral displays using food or beer bottles; smoking cigarettes, cigars, or pipes; biting or chewing one's lip(s))”

--

***this is post-endgame except nobody died, cause im a hoe for all of the avengers***

Steve never realized how much he liked things in his mouth. Not always in a sexual way, at least not until after fighting Thanos.

After fighting for so long, bottling up his emotions was not at all how Steve needed to cope. He tried the yoga and meditation route Wanda had so kindly suggested. Yeah, after one session of hot yoga, Steve decided that it wasn't going to happen. Tony, obviously, suggested sex. Said something about it being a “healing experience for the soul”. That’s bullshit were Steve’s first thoughts when that came out of his mouth. Bucky told him to get some goats and raved about how therapeutic it was to raise them. But Steve could barely take care of himself, how would he even take care of a goat? Steve felt a hot sense of hopelessness burn against the back of his eyes as he sat on the floor of his bedroom, back pressed against the adjoined bathroom door.

“Steve?” A soft knock came from the front door. He took his thumb away from his mouth, he had resorted to subconsciously nibbling on the tip of it. Pulling himself off the door and towards the voice, he rubbed his tear-stricken cheeks in attempts to clean himself up a bit before seeing you.

“One sec, Y/N/N.”

When he opened the door, your face softened a bit before the smile that Steve, secretly, loved so much dropped off your face completely. “Stevie, what happened?”

Stevie, a nickname he hated for his entire life. A name that reminded him of the days before the super solider serum where he was a little guy getting beaten up on the streets of Brooklyn. Stevie, a nickname he loved hearing from your caring voice. Nobody else’s. 

“Just tired, Y/N” he sighed, “so,so tired.”

“Stevie,” your voice caught at the back of your throat. Seeing him in so much pain made your life turn upside down. He doesn't deserve to be in pain. “ S’there anything I can do to make you feel better?”

“Just stay with me? Please?”

You took him back into his bed and sat with him, just talking about life until his breathing turned back to normal and he seemed partially-okay. 

“Do you want to take a bath?” you asked, still stroking the blonde strands of his hair.

“Are you saying I smell?” He took his face out of the crook of your shoulder, feigning a look of hurt.

“No, punk, I meant to relax. You seemed pretty shaken up and I just wanted to help. I mean, that’s what I do when I feel down, relax in a bat-”

He cuts you off, “I appreciate it. Really, Y/N, I don’t know many people that are as loving and caring as you, sweetheart.” The nickname made a pang in your heart. You had like the super solider since you had met him, but never felt like he reciprocated the feelings. Even though you both cuddled often, and had movie nights, and he always let you beat him while sparring, and that one time you came down with a stomach bug and he fed you soup and-holy shit. Did Steve like you? “Sweetheart?”

“Huh?”

“I said, ‘A bath does sound nice’. What’s got you so suddenly zoned out?” He says, donning a smirk.

“It’s nothing. Let’s get you into that bath, mister,” you had a faux grumpy look on your face as you got up and walked to the bathroom, starting to fill the white, ceramic bathtub with warm water. “Okay, big boy. You need help getting up or are you okay?”

Rolling his eyes at your inauthentic tone, Steve pushes his tensed frame off the body and managed to stumble into the bathroom, while you following him closely to make sure he doesn't fall over from exhaustion.

“I get it, I’m old, but damn Y/N. I can walk perfectly fine,” He chuckles as he pushes himself up to sit on the counter top.

You start to fill up the bathtub with warm water, adding bubbles and lighting a few scented candles. He looked so pretty, hair sticking out in every direction, lips pink and puffy from biting them, his ocean blue eyes still misty as he looks down at his cuticles, picking them slightly. 

“Okay, I’m gonna leave so you can take this bath,” you say, shutting off the faucet, “Got it?”

“Y/N?”

“Yes, Stevie.”

“Stay, please.” His eyes were watering more than earlier. He had those puppy dog eyes, lip quivering as his voice cracked and wavered even with just a few words. He looked so vulnerable, how could you say no to him?

“Of course, Steve. I mean, the bubbles with kind of cover everything. I’ll just sit next to the tub with you, alright?” You awkwardly giggled and scratched the back of your neck. He nodded, hopping off of the counter and starting to undress himself with a wobble. “Stevie, you’re shaking like a leaf, let me help you.”

His eyes never met yours as you helped him pull his t-shirt over his head and looped your delicate fingers through the waistband of his sweatpants, dragging them down his muscular thighs. “You’re not gonna finish your job, doll?”

His boxers. The only clothes he had left on were his grey boxers. You wanted to give him privacy and not look, especially in such a broken and vulnerable state. But god, you could see the outline of his partially-hard cock through the soft cotton. You thought about what it would be like to have your mouth around his hard length, chocking on it as he rammed himself into the back of your throat.

“Ummm, I just--I thought--I mean I can---Only if you want--” The dirty thoughts clouded your brain. It made speaking a speaking a sentence almost impossible as your mouth watered just thinking about his cock.

“It was a joke, sweetheart,” he laughed heartily, “You’re too adorable.”

Pulling his boxers down his legs, he waddled tiredly over to the tub before stepping in. He groaned in pleasure at the feeling of the warm water encapsulating his exhausted body. You imagined that’s how he’d groan if you sucked his cock so hard he was seeing stars.

You were still facing the door, like you were as Steve got completely undressed. You knew if you turned around and look at him, naked and at ease, you’d jump his bones in a heartbeat. “Come sit with me, Y/N”

And you did. You turned around cautiously, like you expected, the bubbles covered his body enough for you to be able to handle yourself as you sat down next to the tub. You grabbed his hand away from his lips, running your soft fingers over his rough calloused ones. “I always see you biting your nails or cuticle or lips or your pens. Why?”

He sighed, “I’m not sure, I guess it just distracts me?” He said it more like it was a question rather than a statement. “I guess I don’t truly know why I do it, I guess I just enjoy having things in my mouth.”

You could read Steve like a book, his pupils blown with lust, his lip stuck between his teeth, a blush heating up his cheeks. You took a leap of faith.

“Yeah, like what?”

“You.”

His lips were on yours in a flurry, it took a second for you to react, but as soon as you did it felt amazing. Neither of you seemed to care about the water splashing over you as his hands trailed up your body, tugging at the hem of your shirt.

He pulls away panting, “F-Fuck, Y/N, I need you. Please. Oh my god I need you so bad,” His eyes looked as if they were welling up with tears and he looked so pretty still in the relaxing bubble bath, whimpering and whining for you. 

“God, I need you too, baby,” you stop to look in his eyes sincerely, “Are you sure you want this? I don’t want to do anything that you don’t want to do or that you will regret.” Your hand caresses his cheek.

“Just get in here with me and I’ll show you how much I want you,” he whispered, “Need you, really.”

You sighed before your hands moved shakily to take off your t shirt. As much as you wanted this, you were still scared of how the ripped super solider would feel about you and your body, As soon as your shirt was off, Steve was whimpering, dipping his hand into the soapy water to massage his aching cock. This only spurred you to take off your clothes and join him faster. 

“Did I say you could touch yourself, puppy?” Your stern voice caught him off-guard, making him pause his actions with a look of fear on his face. You step into the bathtub, straddling him. Your nails raked up his milky white thighs, trailing up his body admiring the beauty of it. “Y’Know I was planning on being nice to you because you’ve been so good to me, but you might need to be punished, baby? Do you need to punshied like a brat?”

He mewled, bowing his head in shame. You could feel him growing harder and harder by the second and you were starting to go crazy with the empty feeling inside of you that on he could fill. “No, ma’am. I’ll be good, I swear!”

“Mmmm, that’s my good boy.” Your hands slid up his chest and rested on his cheeks, hearing him preen at your praise, as you repositioned yourself over his cock. “Are you sure you want this?”

“If you dont ride me into next week right fucking now I’m going to scream, Y/N,” He breathed out with a chuckle, Grabbing your thighs, he helps you sink down on his cock. Both of you were moaning and whimpering messes by the time you were sitting at this base of him, trying to get adjusted to his large size. 

Hot tears burned at the back of his eyes as soon as you lifted yourself up off of him, only leaving the tip of him inside of you, and slamming back down on his dick. 

“Baby-please,” he whimpered, “n-need, shit, need your fingers, bad.” 

You were confused, slowing down a bit to make sure he was okay. But his puppy dog eyes showed that he was okay. Slowly taking your wrist from his cheek, he puts your fingers in his warm mouth. Moaning around them and swirling his tongue around them. He did it the same way you always dreamed about sucking his dick, chocking and gagging on his length.

“Yeah, you’re such a needy little slut for me, for this pussy. Look at you, so ruined and fucked out just because I’m fucking you.” He moaned sensually at your words making your core tighten impossibly. 

You had gotten a good idea as you were riding him. Slowly, you start to thrust your hand in and out of his mouth, watching the saliva dribble out of the corners of his mouth as he choked on you. The band in your tummy starts tightening as you feel yourself getting close. 

“Shit, fuck, baby, I’m gonna come. Oh my god, you’re make me come with your beautiful cock, puppy. So good for me, aren’t you?” Your free hand dips into the water, cupping his balls and rolling them around your soft palm.

He nods, choking on your nimble finger yet again his you massage his sensitive balls. “Gonna come,” he slurred and spit around you.\, “almost there.”

“I didn’t” you moaned as you feel his balls tighten, fall back down on his cock at a faster pace, “give you permission to do that. I thought you were going to be good for me?”

“I am” he spluttered loudly, “i am good, I swear. Just please let me come. I need it, oh shit, mommy.”

The name went straight to your core, making you grow weak as you feebly give him permission to come as you come undone with one more bounce on his large member. His hands come up to grope your breasts as he come with hot spurts inside of your tight cunt. 

“Oh my god,” you stifle a giggle as you stand up on shaky legs. You wordlessly helped him out of the tub and wrapped him in a white towel, walking him to bed while you dried yourself off. Collapsing on the bed with a grunt, the solider hollds out his hand to you, signalling you to lay down with him. You could easily tell he was still coming down from his sex high, starting to regain his self back.

“I dont know what possessed me to,” he pauses, trying to figure out a way to word the rest of his sentence, “to suck, I guess, on your hand. I’m sorry, Y/N, that was really weird of me.”

“What do’ya mean, baby? Having an oral fixation isn’t something to be ashamed of.” The words make him smile with droopy eyes, tucking his head into your neck and starting to fall asleep, happy and comfortable, cuddling you.

“And to be honest, puppy. I think it’s really hot.”

[thesunshinebunny]

How about NRC putting on a talent show every year for the students and MC/Yuu/Reader putting on a proper "show", going up on stage alone, singing and dancing like a real Kpop star. How dorm leaders would react along with the freshmen since at no point did MC tell them that they were going to participate????

I can’t tell you if you were lucky with the exit of chapter 5 or that you are simply a fortune teller dear anon. But I'm going to tell you something that I am sure of ... this type of request is MY JAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW NIIICE !!!!

I recommend listening to the following song since for this one-short I relied on it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mxAlX7Zeco&ab_channel=LeagueofLegends

Second Part

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The show had been a success. Neige had gone up to conquer his fans and record producers, his tender figure had fallen in love the entire public. But when it came time for Vil and the other boys ... the arena was on fire. They shone, there is no other word to describe their performance. It was hypnotic to see them move with such synchronization, even Grim was dancing as if his life depended on it, incredible that just two weeks ago this cat couldn’t coordinate his two hind legs.

There wasn’t much more to say, the boys were excellent, I was envious I couldn’t have gone up with them. Yes, I was completely mad at Vil for not letting me participate, as according to him, I wasn’t going to fit in well in the group given my vocal chords and my intonation. Now I would show him the serious mistake he made. With the applause reverberating over the audience, the boys emerged one by one, Vil being the last one taking his characteristic super model steps.

"That was great, we have to repeate it one day" Kalim was overflowing with joy. You could see in his eyes that he had enjoyed it.

"Stay calm Kalim" Jamil as always trying to calm him down and prevent him from spreading so much happiness.

“(Y / N) did you see us? Did you like the show? I think we did great. ”Ace, Deuce and Grim approached me from all sides, huge smiles on their faces. I was very happy for them, even proud of what they had accomplished.

"Excuse my daring, I know we are all charged with adrenaline, but I couldn't help but observe that you, mon ami, look completely beautiful"

It was a matter of time until Rook or Vil noticed my appearance. Transparent black top with details in the chest area, iridescent violet choker hiding the neck of the top, black cut leggings and two-inch platforms. Matching makeup with violet, black and turquoise colors.

"Did you produce yourself for the occasion?" Vil showed a look of pride, apparently my clothing was of his approval.

"Mmmm, something like that"

Out of the corner of my eye I could see how my team was coming to the stage. Ortho was standing behind the light panel and Lilia over the music control, while three freshmen from Pomefiore were positioning themselves to go out into the audience.

"Hurry (Y/N) we are about to go out"

The guys in front of me stared puzzled, not understanding much of the situation. Before anyone could open their mouths, we heard Mr. Crewel make a short announcement over the speakers:

“To end this beautiful day, we called our last guest and their companions to the stage. Please give (Y/N) (L/N) a big round of applause”

With a smile I looked towards where the Pomefiore students were leaving for the stage, gradually getting into their positions. On the other hand, I slightly saw Ortho and Lilia, both of them raised their thumbs, a sign that everything was ready. The lights in the entire stalls were turned off, leaving a single diffuse purple light on the stage where I was supposed to be placed.

Before going out into the audience, I looked at the boys and said in the most self-centered and proud voice that I could:

"It's show time"

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It was shocking to see from the stage how not only the students but also guests and families were approaching us in a superhuman way. But what almost perplexed me was the fact that I found the dorm leaders off to one side from the stalls, as if they had a secluded place just for themselves. Vil had arrived in the blink of an eye, I'll have to make a mental note to ask how he did it.

I was very surprised to see Leona and Idia, perhaps the last one decided to leave his cave when he knew his little brother would be helping me put on a show. If I didn’t expect to see Leona, I was expected for that damn lion was to be lying in his room, without the slightest intention of seeing the show.

Now I'm a bit nervous.

The same was in the case of the teachers, they were watching from a high audience, avoiding the congestion of people around them.

Already in position, microphone in ear, encouraging smiles from my dance partners and some nerves that ran through my spine, I was ready to put on my best show.

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Unbeknownst to me, the first-year one braincell boys had arrived in time to sneak into the front row, even Sebek who was being grabbed by the arm by Epel. From where they were he could see Malleus directly, so he didn't care much about being led to where they were.

Ace and Deuce were already looking puzzled, still unable to understand the situation. At no time had they found out that their magicless friend was going to participate in this contest, much less alone (although in reality you were accompanied, but you understand)

And ... As you said before ...

Show time

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Coming at you live Real real wild Here to light it up Set the world on fire Gonna break rules And hearts in twos 'Cause that's what the baddest do

Vil was the first to react and in the worst way: his soul fell to the ground to hear your voice intoning perfectly with the music and how the way Lilia was playing the sound made your intonations reverberate much more than possible. He was internally cursing himself for not involving you in his group, you would have been a great companion, he would even have put your own solo.

He was just as impressed by the physical ability that not only you had, but his dorm residents as well. He was proud of his first-year boys, but in the same way he was going to repress them at the end of the day for didn’t warned him they were going to participate ... but between us, it will be nothing more than a reprimand of a few seconds, since inevitably he would congratulate them.

Kalim was amazed, he had never seen a choreography like this and in his seventeen years he saw countless dances in many parties. His eyes shone at the sight of you moving as if your life depended on it, and the fact that you could sing without getting tired after so much hustle ... impressive. When the show was over, he would go directly to ask you to teach him how to move that way, just as he would return the favor by teaching you traditional dances from his native land.

Pretty face 걸어들어와 유행 선두자 원하지만 못하잖아 애가 타잖아 You like "whoa" KALI you the GOAT 난 알지 I know

Azul's and Riddle's mouths almost reaches the floor. Not only were they impressed by your dancing and the amazing, powerful song you were singing, but they felt like they ascended to heaven by hearing you sing in Korean. Neither of them knew that you had such a capacity, and although they knew very little about the language, they understood you perfectly.

Likewise, Riddle was completely flushed. He wasn’t used to seeing this type of show and looked almost hypnotized as your body moved at an almost vertigo rate. Azul on the other hand was as fascinated as Kalim, not to the point of asking you to teach him to dance, the very poor man can barely walk with his new two human feet; but he was interested in having some business matters with you, maybe introducing you once or twice a week at the Monstro Lounge… who knows.

Sorry for the bad news, sorry I'm so bad Only took a minute for me to get what you had Sorry for the bad news, know it makes you sad I'll be here for a minute, baby, you should pack your bags

At some point during this incredible show you caught eyes with Leona, who, to tell the truth, had his trademark smirk on his face. He really liked what he was seeing, not everyone could have the stamina to sing and dance that way. Lowkey impressed. He smiled sincerely at you, or that's what his smile conveyed, and sent you moral support by shaking his head. Beside him, Idia was biting his nails annoyingly. He was mentally kicking his butt for not having brought in incandescent lights, the same lights that are used at idol concerts.

As for Malleus… let's just say he was having a good time, after all. Even not understanding much of this kind of event, he enjoyed watching you dance and sing so happily, an act that he didn't have the pleasure of witnessing so much.

Look at the gold all on my chest Look at the gold, call it a flex

The entire state completely exploded. The clapping and screaming overwhelmed your ears. Among the people you noticed the first years clapping and giving you their full support like a bunch of crazy people. The leaders clapped too, each at their own pace, some more invigorating and some more proud.

[beomglocks]

what soobin is like as a boyfriend

warnings & other: none i just love him but let’s be honest who doesn’t, this gets cheesy in some parts bc he just gives off stereotypical kdrama bf vibes but guys he’s the one

w/c: round to 1k

ok first off 

sorry if i rant soobin is my baby so ofc i think he’s the perfect boyfriend

he’s so

ugh

ok when you meet him he’s a shy boy

like really won’t wanna look you in the eye

ok like super fucking awkward

like painfully and you’re like “hahah ok that’s cute”

that only applies if you look intimidating tho

if you’re one of those people who’s blessed with not having resting bitch face he’ll be flirty

well you know..

he has his own methods of being flirty

he’s charming in his own way

probably does what yeonjun does but more subtle

stares

will stare at you

and when you make eye contact he smiles and rubs his lip with his finger DJSJSKDK PLZ

alternatively: looks away, purses his lips with a smile, ears get red, looks back up to you already looking at him then he waves

youre left like

“omg he’s so fucking cute”

ok but actually like he will reel you in without you even knowing

next thing you know you’re laughing at his lame ass jokes

god forbid you think he’s funny

“you think I’m funny? well we should date” :)

wait im pretty sure he said he doesnt go after someone unless he knows they like him back

tbh he’d probably wait until you make the first move

or wait until you show interest or else he’ll just hide his feelings

you have to bring him out of his shell

once you do...oh boy

100% never leaving you alone

always telling you how much he loves you

he’s the sweetest

teeth rotting sweet

i feel like he would slowly open up to you during the relationship

he’s not like automatically into it if that makes sense

shy to initiate things at first

such as kissing and touching

asks you if it’s ok first

we love consent

free samples kind of guy

dont take him to an ice cream shop or shops in general

he will devour the free samples

next thing you know you’re leaving with goat cheese and the newest ice cream flavour

he gives hopeless romantic vibes

would want to bake with you in the kitchen

and i know this sounds cliche but

flour fight

he’s cute with it at first

just rubs some flour on your nose then next thing you know

“we turned our dog white”

he’s a simple man

however

he probably spoils you

but not like expensive item type of spoiling he isn’t extravagant

god forbid the price range of any of the items he buys you exceeds his actual paycheck

cute gifts that you’ll actually use and cherish

i dont see many fights happening with him tbh

maybe if you question his leadership choices then i can see a fight happening

for example if you think he couldve handled a situation better in a certain way and you point that out to him he’ll get all defensive

“im the leader of my group dont tell me what you think is best for my group”

then you’re just like “well shit fuck you too i was just tryna help”

i can see him distancing himself after a fight if you’re also feeling a bit aggitated

doesn’t talk to you until it’s literally 2am and neither of you are sleeping bc yall always cuddle and you’re not cuddling him

:(

he’s always the first one to say sorry

my god he makes fun of you so much

not on a beomgyu level though

more of a “if you say something silly i will make you feel so dumb for the rest of the day” kind of clowning

wow jealousy

i feel like he’s not super jealous unless he feels threatened

everything was fine until the fire nation attacked

once he sees you getting a little too buddy buddy with someone else he’s like nah i gotta shut this shit down

he’s humble but once he’s jealous he’s all braggy to make himself seem above who ever was trying to get at you

“yeah i think we ALL-”

boy do you have to comfort this big baby

he’s sensitive :(

hold him and rub his head on his off days

tell him he’s the best boy and it doesnt matter what anyone else thinks screw them

he laughs like 

“shouldnt i be comforting you?” 

soooooooooo sappy

cliche asf boyfriend

buys you flowers

if he could he would be doing the whole radio outside your window thing (side note: yeonjun would too be he’s whipped asf)

college bf (we saw it coming)

see also: college bf who helps you in what he can and tells you to screw math bc you don’t need it anyways

shows up at your school or job after his practice

everyone loves him

everyone

you gotta be on guard 24/7

i wouldnt say you’d be insecure per se but soobin definietly lacks awareness when it comes to being flirted with

he recognizes others advances but laughs awkwardly, forgetting to tell the person he already has a partner

~cue mild argument~

at the end of it all he’s like “dont worry i only like you jeez”

if he’s working on a song he asks for your input

or rather how would you interpret a certain emotion that he isn’t able to convey

just to joke around, if he has to write a song about heartbreak but neither of you have been through that he’ll be like

“well there’s a first for everything :)”

soobin 100% takes the time to learn about your culture

he’s invested what can i say

introducing you to the other members isn’t THAT bad

but they definitely clown soobin

txt: “how come your partner is cooler than our own leader”

“maybe they should lead us instead” (joke)

soobin’s like fuck yall i can be cool :(

always send you cute selfies

with messages along the lines of

“i miss you :((((”

“bring ice cream on your way back!”

“be safe tho xxx”

he gives embarassing dad vibes

you can’t introduce him to your friends !

since he has you around he isn’t too shy and once he engages in conversation you better pack your bags

he’s trying to be funny (keyword: trying) but really it’s just your friends laughing to not make the hot idol bf not feel bad

you help him with his script for music bank

speaking of music bank

yes, yes, you are clowning him like the rest of txt and he comes home like

“not you too :(((((((”

hueningkai

my goodness hueningkai

yall tussle over soobin’s attention

sometimes it feels like youre sharing soobin with kai

you love them both but youre like “kai sweetie it’s cold and i wanna be the one to cuddle my bf so please”

speaking of cuddles 

best cuddles

ones where he’s wearing a really comfortable sweater that’s actually nice material and your face gets buried in his chest 

his limbs will be tangled in yours no doubt

but wow he’s so warm you almost never wanna let go

they don’t call him “home” for nothing

tall boy

makes fun of you if you’re shorter than him

yes he does tease you by placing items on higher-than-you-can-reach shelves

kick his shins he’ll give in

you: ”hows the weather up there”

him: “nice actually but you wouldnt know now would you :)”

tell him your problems, tell him anything

he will listen

and i mean let-you-ramble-for-hours kind of listen

but at the end of it his input is always valuable and he isn’t judgemental

he’s a good listener and gives good advice!!!

he’s not the leader for no reason put some damn trust in him!

[bumblesimagines]

Green Thumb

Part 13

Request: Yes or No

~

You stared in awe as the jet flew into Wakanda. It had been even more beautiful in person. Most of the places you went to were cities. Wakanda had a lot of pretty views so you hoped you could at least stay for a day or two. You noticed the statue of a panther, humming softly before the city came into view.

"This place is gorgeous." Sam breathed out. You nodded, smiling softly.

"I bet you're more excited to see Bucky, huh?" Sam grinned, looking at you. You rolled your eyes, glancing at him and shrugging.

"So?"

"As long as he treats you right.. I won't fuck with him." Sam said, patting your shoulder. You shot him a look, raising your brows.

"Okay, I'll probably fuck with him a little." Sam winked, chuckling softly as the jet landed. You bit your bottom lip, trying to fight back a smile as you followed everyone off the jet. T'Challa and the Dora Milaje waited for everyone.

"Seems like I'm always thanking you for something." Steve said, shaking T'Challa's hand. Bruce cleared his throat, going to bow. You chuckled, shaking your head.

"We don't do that here." T'Challa said, waving him off. Bruce glanced at an amused Rhodes.

"How big of an assault are we expecting?" T'Challa asked, turning and walking towards the palace. Your gaze flickered around, looking for Bucky.

"Uh, sir, sir, a pretty big assault." Bruce responded. You met Wandas' teasing gaze, looking away with a soft huff.

"How we looking?" Natasha asked, glancing at T'Challa.

"We have my Kings Guard, the Border Tribe, the Dora Milaje, and..." T'Challa trailed off, motioning to Bucky. You smiled widely.

"A semi stable a hundred year old man." Bucky finished for him, smiling as he hugged Steve.

"I brought you a friend, Buck." Steve smiled, stepping aside. Buckys' smile widened when his gaze landed on you, arms opening. You walked forward, hugging him.

"Not the circumstances I expected but.. I'm glad to see you again." Bucky said softly, leaning back. You smiled up at him, feeling him gently touch your cheek with his new metal arm. Your gaze softened, gently leaning into his touch.

"Uhm.. When- When did this happen?" Bruce asked quietly.

"No clue." Rhodes answered, staring at you and Bucky. You stayed outside with Bucky and Sam, wanting to spend more time with him.

"I'll show you my place after all this. You'll be able to meet Aang and Korra in person." You giggled at Buckys' words, nodding. You had helped him name the goats he had bought after T'Challa got him a plot of land he could peacefully live in.

"We'll finally be able to watch the show together." You cooed, hand gently coming up to play with Buckys hair.

"Yeah, I can show you how to tend to the goats and you can help me start a nice garden." Bucky said softly. You raised your brows, grinning.

"Oh? So does that mean I'll be moving in with you?"

"Maybe.. If that's what you want, doll." Bucky replied, metal thumb gently rubbing your cheek.

"Yeah, I'd like that. You'll have to come with me to the family farm though. Everyones been dying to meet you." You told him softly. Bucky raised a brow.

"That's a first." He mumbled.

"So, are you two a thing or what?" Rhodes asked, motioning to you and Bucky. You looked at Bucky, waiting for him to answer though Bucky looked right back you. You stayed silent, head tilting slightly.

"Great answer, guys. Made me tear up a little." Sam said, watching you and Bucky. You rolled your eyes at him, feeling Bucky slither an arm around your waist, a cheeky smirk on his face.

"You two are big babies." You said, arms crossing. You looked up at the sky, frowning.

"Hey, guys?" The two looked up, seeing the chunk flying towards the city. Luckily, there was a barrier protecting the city.

"God, I love this place." Bucky whispered.

"(Y/N), come up. I'm gonna need you here protecting Vision." You heard Steve say, nodding. You licked your lips, hesitating before giving Buckys' cheek a quick peck. You quickly walked away, following one of the guards to where Vision was. You could hear Sam teasing Bucky through the earpiece, chuckling softly. You entered the room as the others left, glancing at Vision.

"You'll be okay." You said softly. Vision nodded, though he was unconvinced. You stood beside Wanda, watching from the window. Your brows furrowed when you noticed the millions of creatures running at the barrier. The first few died but some eventually made it in.

"I should be down there." You said softly. You turned your head when Shuri asked if T'Challa wanted to open the barrier. You swallowed, looking at Wanda.

"I'll be fine." Wanda said, giving you a nod. You turned, leaving the room. You quickly left the building, using wind to boost you into the air and towards the battle. You landed near Bucky, raised your hand and getting the stream of water to shoot forward, catching a bunch of aliens in it. You raised up the water, seeing the aliens trying to get out of the large bubble.

"Sam!"

"Got it!" You made the water let the aliens go, Sam shooting rockets at them and making them explode in the air. You moved your arm, moving it forward in a swinging motion and making the aliens infront of you fly back to the barrier, getting electrocuted and fried.

"Damn.." Bucky whispered. You grinned, shrugging lightly. You rose up into the air, hands moving in front of you and shooting out fire at the ones entering through the part of the barrier that was open. A spear like weapon came flying at you so you dodged it, only for it to come fly back and hit you. You got electrocuted, losing focus and falling to the ground.

"Fuck, that's gonna leave a bruise." You groaned, sitting up and rubbing your shoulder.

"You okay?" Bucky and Sam asked simultaneously.

"Yeah, I guess. Surprised my shoulder didn't get dislocated cause of that alien bitch."

"Woah, (Y/N)." Sam chuckled, shooting at some aliens.

"What? She threw that spear shit at me. She kind of deserves it." You noticed the aliens rushing towards you, bringing your hand up and above you. The ground below you broke off and rose, making you sigh in relief.

"Sam!" You shouted when he was knocked down by an alien. You lifted him up with air, glancing at Bucky. Sam was able to fly again so you focused on Bucky, bringing him to you.

"You okay?" You asked softly.

"Thanks for asking, (Y/N). I'm doing amazing." Sam said sarcastically as he flew by. Bucky rolled his eyes, panting softly. He had a scratch on his cheek.

"Kiss it better?" Bucky breathed out, head tilting.

"Not very hygienic." You replied, chuckling softly. You plucked a flower from the hovering chunk, resting it against Buckys cheek. It withered as the scratch healed.

"Thanks, doll." Bucky breathed out, picking up his gun and pointing it forward. You shielded your eyes when a beam shot from the sky, an axe flying out and hitting the aliens. When the beam went away, you spotted Thor. Thor and his two odd looking friends charged forward, attacking every alien in sight.

"Hop off, Bucky." You said, watching him nod and jump off. You let the chunk of ground drop on the aliens below you, cringing at the guys and blood the spewed out.

"That's nasty." You muttered, turning to face the others. You focused on a group of aliens attacking some Wakandans, one hand rising and using the air to make the Wakandans rise before the other hand moved to open up the ground beneath the aliens. You made the ground close again, safely placing them down. You felt the ground begin to tremble, seeing the trees being knocked down. Something rose from the ground.

"What the hell is that?" You watched it, noticing it looked like wheels with spikes. More rose up, taking out both aliens and people. Wanda flew down, saving Natasha and Okoye. You focused on one, making large roots fly up, raising the machine and wrapping around it until it was crushed completely.

"Guys, we have a Vision situation." Sam called.

"Someone go help Vision!" Steve said, punching an alien.

"I got him!"

"On my way-" You heard Wanda cry out, turning and seeing her rolling down at small hill. Natasha and Okoye were there so you weren't too concerned.

"I'll go too." You called, rising up and following Bruce to the small wooded area. Bruce took care of the big guy so you focused on the other guy.

"Nice seeing you here again, asshole." You mumbled as you landed. The alien sneered, glaring at you. He ran forward, swinging a staff around. You raised your hand, blasting him back with fire. You heard Bruce trying to get Hulk to help but it was useless.

"Useless without your powers, huh?" The alien stood.

"Yeah, I've heard enough of that in movies. I'm happy using my powers to kick your ass." You shrugged. He scowled, charging forward again. You let him get close, grabbing his staff thing when he swung it and grabbing him by the throat with a burning half. You could feel and hear his skin sizzling, staring into his eyes as he groaned. You cried out when something stabbed your thigh, letting him go briefly. He took the opportunity to knock you onto the around. He raised his weapon but Vision quickly threw him back.

"Are you alright, (Y/N)?" Vision asked. You slowly sat up, grabbing the handle of the dagger.

"Well, I just got stabbed but other than that, I'm pretty good." You breathed out, pulling the dagger out. Blood quickly spilled out of the open wound but stopped once you began healing yourself. You looked up, seeing Vision being tossed to the ground. Steve came running at the alien, shoving him back. You stood up, slightly limping towards Vision and helping him up.

"You can't fully heal yourself, can you?" Vision looked at you in concern.

"I'll be fine." You assured him softly, looking over at Steve. You thrusted your hand forward, making a root impale the aliens head.

"Thanks."

"No problem, Cap."

~

Tags: @geek-and-proud

[pandasized-crevice]

MY FRESH JUST WATCHED KINNPORSCHE EP10 THOUGHTS

AYO VEgas DONT HIT HIM WHERE IT HURTS

AHHHHH ITS PETE

PETE VS PORSCHE WHAT THE SHIT YALL

im pissing my FUCKING PANTS BRO KINN?!

WE GOTTA TRUST EACH OTHER MY GOD

AYO WE CUDDLING?!?!wait a min.....chay has the shirt he's wearing in the trailer shot of him crying....

its chay pretending to still be sleeping for me god i love him

L O V E YOU JUST CONFESSED THAT YOU LIKED HIM YESTERDAY?!

THE SMILEY FACE EGGS PLS

NOO KIM FUCKING LEAVES AND CHAY GETS KIDDNAPPED?!?FUCKING KIM WHY

oh he's still there GET THEM KIM!!!!!

NO KIM FUCK

can tawan get the fuck outta here you're not part of the gang you bitch

pete my love

kim kinn interaction time!!

AH SHIT ITS HAPPENING

chains and whips girl ball gag

ARM ONCE AGAIN THE FUCKING GOAT

oh porsche is going to go CRAZY

FUCK SHIT FUCK

porsche my dear....vegas is not the one

OKAY VEGAS ILL CHEER FOR YOU ONCE HIT TAWAN AGAIN

NO PETE

I FUCKING KNEW IT WAS KENS BITCHASS

o h?!

sidenote: bible swearing? yeah im a whore

he was never going to be with you you stupid slut!

DAMN BYE TAWAN

ITS KIM OH HELL YEAH

never thought id be so happy to see big

I THOUGHT THAT WHORE WAS DEAD DMANIT

yes please get chay away

NO FUCKING WAY

BIG?!OH MY FUCKINH GOD

KINN JUST KILL HIM

A BOMB?!

HOLY SHIT GIRL

so kim got chay out and what..left him there?

chay my baby:(

deserved head whack

ah shit is kinn realizing that pete never called back?

PETE FUCK

pete you're scaring me babes....

WAIT WAIT

HOLY FUCKING SHIT

oh damn i forgot ken

oh kan didn't know vegas was doing other shit?

damn stabbed to death?

tankhun always a blessing to see

DAMN HIS WHOLE HEAD

kan girl they know whats up

tankhun p i s s e d

shit wait the fake evidence against porsche where is it...

kinn said i wanna go let ME shoot him

kan...idk about you sir...

ME SAY SORRY?HOW BOUT YOU SIR

im tired of kinn saying/insinuating porsche is easy i WILL rip your eyeborws off kinn don't start

"you never trust me" to be fair porsche you didn't trust that kinn had a plan along but yeah kinn a little heads up would've been nice

K I S S nice

A HUG EVEN FUCKING BETTER

this shot is so pretty yall

BED SCENE YAY

does mile have a mole on his finger?yall see that dot on his finger?

or am i seeing things?

PORSCHE IS SO GROSS

OH ITS JUST PETE STUCK WITH VEGAS KINN NOTHING TOO IMPORTANT!!!!!!!!!!!

god i wish that were me

ep11 preview: kan i know about you know fuck you bro, i hear the vegaspete enthusiasts screeching rn,final thoughts: so fucking scared for pete