#but certainly some of it is about being the most scared he's ever been in his life; and patrick wasn't there.
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sweetfuchsia · 2 days ago
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ex bf! sae x reader who likes to play around w/ him pt 8
m.list
after a while, ex bf! sae finally felt himself slipping back to a sense of normalcy. you had put a pause on your pranks for a while, which he assumes is due to the fact you’re.. on a holiday?
he’ll admit, he didn’t expect you to post pictures of some nice resort not even 3 days after getting ‘married’ to a famous soccer player— but at least he knows by now that you’re not actually married. aiku clarified it for him after ex bf! sae pestered the man for a bit.
tonight, your ex boyfriend pays no mind to the rustling outside. he doesn’t have you to worry about for at least another week, so he’s assuming that it’s a cat or something.
it seems that he’s right— because the small sound of a meow catches his ear. you used to tell ex bf! sae that he should never just leave a meowing cat alone, so… in your honour, he supposes he’ll go see what this is about.
what he certainly did not expect to see after opening the door was you wearing a cat onesie with probably the freakiest, yet most realistic cat makeup he’s ever seen on your face.
“meow.”
“name—?” ex bf! sae blinks, taking a small step back. he doesn’t know if he should be scared or what, but this display is… very off-putting, to say the least. “aren’t you supposed to be overseas?”
“meoowww.” you draw out, taking a step closer. you move a hand (or a paw, thanks to your onesie) to wiggle the costume’s plush tail. “meow meow.”
“what’re you—“
“meow.”
“name, stop that—“
“meowwww.”
ex bf! sae’s eye twitches. why are you being so difficult?! the man sighs, placing his hands on his hips as he gives you an unamused look.
“what do you want?” he asks, raising an eyebrow at you. how is it that the two of you were dating back then?
ex bf! sae almost wonders how long it’s actually been since you both interacted romantically— but he figures it’s no use dwelling on the past. you two broke up for a reason.
instead of responding to him, you instead decide to start making purring sounds. to the best of your ability, of course; it’s quite difficult to pur without giggling because of this whole situation.
when you finally do let a small chuckle out, you’re quick to turn around, running back down the pathway as you finally let yourself laugh— and ex bf! sae just stands in his doorway like usual, staring back at you wirh a dumbfounded look.
he’s seriously starting to wonder how you come up with these…
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sleepy-fiction · 7 months ago
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Gold Ring.
-sebastian solace x reader
2k words
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syn: he was a married man, yet he forgets when he's with you.
tgs: fluff, sfw (read a/n), sappy, feel-good, comfort, genderless reader
A/N: guys NO hate to Zerum at all. I just liked the idea of sebastian having a wife but learning true love and self worth from you. This fic is fluff sfw, but there are very mild dirty descriptions used sometimes. MDNI
Predator eyes loom through the darkened abyss. Sweaty, slobbering, hungry for a quench. He can't fight it. He knew you before you met him. He's seen the way you huddle to yourself, the way you persisted in this hell, the way you crawl to him whenever you're scared. How you count down the floors until you can rest-- on him.
He was the first once to make a move.
You bargained to sleep in his little room, yet you laid rest so far away from him. He didn't understand the flithy, possessiveness that growled in his hungry belly. It sent a pissed shiver from the tops of his head that rattled down to his tail.
He remembers the flinch you made at the sight.
He knows that he shouldn't, but fuck he wanted you closer then. No, he wants you closer, all the time.
He never knew romance until he pulled you over to him, the way he wrapped his tail around you like a snake. The way he blew it off with his typical banter, but God help him, the way he remembers your sleeping form carrying a smile throughout your dreams. Content- about him.
Times with his wife were never like this. He didn't know he was capable of feeling such intense desire. He's kissed, held, and he's lpved on and received. It remembers how the saying goes. If you love them, then you'd let him go. He went without a fuss here, content with the idea of his wife enjoying their freedom. But God knows, the idea of you, some inmate who waltzed into his life, leaving? No, it couldn't happen.
It was the pining that eventually sold his fate.
The yearning.
He'd find rocks the colors of your eyes to collect, most likely debris scattered from all the grubby inmates swarming the place just so he could keep something of yours nearby. Whenever he heard the echoing sounds of footsteps, the crawling through his vents, he perfectly memorized your sound yet still found his heart beating in hope even when he knew it couldn't be you.
He had grown overly accustomed to your dynamic. How you acted in playful defiance but respected him and his boundaries so much. He's never met an expendable quite like you, one not pushy- touchy- or downright evil. Even in a group setting, as you sometimes venture into a teams. You're always batting those pretty little eyes at him, saying thank you and apologizing on their behalf.
You're overly aware of him. Scanning his face, always checking for his contentment.
It was cute. You were discreet like a mouse.
For some reason, you had some staring problem. Always gazing with those eyes. So full of admiration for the brutish monster he had become. Those glances certainly didn't help him. You had to be some freak to like someone like him the way he is now. What about him could ever be attractive?
Don't think he doesn't notice the way you fidget in embarrassment whenever he tucks his hair behind his ears.
You get all shy when he gets close. You get shy whenever he escalates your banter- albeit painfully teasing you- but still-- it affects you.
He affects you.
That's a sensation that makes him question his self worth, and your character.
If someone as good as you finds him lovely. Then is he really? Could he really be...
His three blue hands.
Could they ever be loveable again?
It's that question that finally makes all the symptoms that has been building over the months of you being here finally click.
God he's.
He's falling in love with you.
He swallows thick, unable to read the document before his eyes.
Ba-dum, Ba-dum, Ba-dum
His heart races in his chest, his snaggle teeth gnawing against his lip, his eyes shutting impossibly shut. His hands fidget together, and the feeling of cold metal against (what used to be) his ring finger, and guilt swells in his belly.
He's in love with you. When all this time he was working hard to return to her.
He's in love with you. He heart yearns to leave with you and Painter.
He's in love with you. He doesn't feel the same about his wife. His identity is crumbling before his very soul, and it's terrifying.
His only anchor had been his wife the entire time.
His grip goes vice over his wedding ring. A ringing hiss, and a weeping cry flees his meekly throat.
He had a decent life. A woman who loved him.
But if this feeling he's feeling right now for you is love, then...
He shakes his head, his left hand slapping over his mouth, his right still coddling the ring on his smaller hand.
He can't.
He can't think that way.
In no magical universe will he ever get to have you. You'll leave here, he can see it now. It reflects in your eyes, it's this during gleam that no other expendable has.
He'll be left here to rot.
He needs to accept that and not get--
"Sebastian?"
His blood runs cold, his body jolting upright with a fury.
Fuck. He didn't even hear you enter.
A flashlight clicks, shinning at his belly.
He sees you.
You, who always calls his name so softly. So tenderly, full of respect and admiration. You who makes him feel like a person again. You who remembers things about him, you who points lights at his belly because you remember what hurts him.
He can't stop the tear that rolls out.
"Oh no," your voice dips heartbreaking soft as you set the flashlight down, "What's wrong, Sebastian?" You approach him slowly pausing in front of him with your palms up, asking with your body, with your eyes if you could touch him.
He laughs at you. The sound croaks in bittersweetness.
He leans down to your hands, resting his face in your palms. You're so warm, it makes his heart flutter. "It looks you've caught me at a bad time," he says sing-songly.
Your eyes are full of understanding, the way you smile. "Seems so," you say, brimming to see he was okay. You're giving him space, he hates how he begins to yearn.
He can't help it when you're like this.
Sebastian strains.
"Everyone needs to cry sometimes, especially in this place. I cry, too. A lot." You whisper.
But you're still smiling.
God.
He hates you.
He giggles. The sound is so out of character, so school-girlishly giddy. "Fuck," he grimaces as he burries his cheeks into your palm. He knows he cannot physically blush anymore, but he still feels the shame.
He's turning soft.
Soft for such an airhead.
He swallows nervously, looking up to peer into your eyes. You're admiring him again. Your shifty pupils drag up and down his features again and again and again like a broken record. Holding your lips agape, and sucking in swallow breathes, as if the faintest movement from every breathing too intensely would disrupt the view.
He can't take it.
His hands shoot out for you, one on your hip, the other around your waist, the final caressing your back. You squeak as he pulls you completely into him, your feet rising from the floor. You rest your head dazily on his shoulder, as he slithers onto the dark, farther away from your abandoned light.
When you finally stopped moving, you could feel a wall behind Sebastian, as you straddled a leg on each side of his tail, your knees against the floor.
"Sebastian? I can't see you," you whine.
"You don't need to look at me..." He hushes.
Your hands find his cheeks, they're all warmed up from you.
"I need to," you lean in closer, rubbing your nose against his nostril slits. His breath shudders.
"Pull it," He whispers.
You already know as you reach and pull his antenna. A dim warm light illuminates his face, and you smile contently.
Your hands parade through his hair, tucking the strands of his hair back away from his face on both sides; the way you've seen him do many times before.
You've forced him to admit it now.
He's something worth gawking at.
Even like this.
Embarrassment is a surprisingly delicious taste for his belly.
You slide back in his arms, as his hands lean back and fall to his side. All except for his right, which cups a healthy amount of your hip to keep you steady on his tail.
Now it's his turn to admire you.
"Hmm, pretty thing," He mumbles. His smaller hand reaches up your body, his gold ring flashing in the eyes of both of you.
He tenses.
You notice. Your hands rest on his shoulders as you lean in closer to him.
"Sebastian." You blink, empathy driving your veins.
He already knows.
"I used to have a wife. Long before... This happened to me," He whispers it to the air.
Now it's your turn to feel a deep pang in your heart. You know you shouldn't say it, but the words burst out, "Did you love her?"
You watch as a strained smile pulls at him, "N-Not... Not as much as..." He swallows abruptly, "yuh... Y-You."
It all clicks for you.
He's sad over guilt?
You giggle-- and it's almost as painfully giddy as the one he let out before. But it's not enough as thr giggle turns into a laugh. The sound is bright and refreshing to his ears, like rays of forlorn sunshine kissing him. He can't help the way his ears twitch in pure glee.
He'll drink up this sound forever.
"Little cheater," you giggle into his skin as you kiss his cheeks.
He's deeply affected by this! It's not funny!
"Hey." He can't seem to reprimand you, though. "Bastard," He hushes.
You break away finally. And before you could lean in to plant more kisses, his free hands are on you again. Trailing up your body, up your chest (with him seeming to slow down a bit for that part), then to your shoulders, to roll down to your lovely hands. Lovely hands that he moves to place on his meaty chest.
"Come here," he finally commands, and it's like your knees go weak. The two of you meet in the middle, your lips melting into one another like starved animals. The way you nip and howl in between fervent friction-- friction unknown tp you both since entering this hell hole.
His kisses are filled with longing, desire, full of shivers, full of breathy moans. Sensations that send waves of shivers down to the tips of his tail.
You pull apart to suck on his bottom lip, and with a grunt, Sebastian's mouth cracks open obediently. His large tongue rolls out of his mouth and deep into yours. It's stuffiness enough to make you choke if he wasn't so careful- and if the feeling wasn't so erotic.
Your little alien.
You caress his face all over, your fingertips finding his twitching ears. You pull apart with a hearty smack of the lips, a thin trail of saliva rolling out from you from his large tongue. He picks it up before it could fall to your chin, a satisfied hum from him.
You kiss his round jaw, thumbs caressing circles into his under eyes.
"I love you," Sebastian kisses it into your skin.
"I love you too," you sigh wholeheartedly. You lean in and kiss his tiny third eye, and he hums sing-songly.
Your arms slide around his neck, burying your face into the crook of his jaw, relaxing your body deep into him with a sigh.
You two were so peaceful. You barely noticed the sagging lethal drowsiness in your veins. You haven't slept in... Haven't slept in....
Snorrreeeee...
Sebastian laughs at you. You fell right asleep, just like that? His tail wraps around you like a snake, as his kisses make themselves known to your forehead.
"Goodnight, expendable..." He snickers.
And the gold ring slips from his finger.
To have a future with the benefit of you being there, it's more than just a dream come true.
You accepted him.
He can accept himself, too.
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sematarygirls · 1 month ago
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🐞 ⊹ᡣ𐭩₊⋆ ─── rafe sees anxious!reader's tramp stamp for the first time
cw: suggestive but mostly fluff, angst if you squint, curvy? reader, body image insecurities
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       It wasn't like you were hiding it or anything. You certainly weren't ashamed of the permanent ink artwork embedded into your lower back. In fact, you had loved it ever since you got it done.
The problem was that you were self-conscious about your body. You weren't big enough to be considered plus sized, but you weren't small enough to be considered ideal either. You were in a weird middle zone that left you feeling utterly undesirable and completely at war with your body, which led you to wearing a lot of high-rise pants and other articles of clothing that obscured your body—your lower back included.
You also met Rafe in the winter. How he, the hottest guy in Kildare and maybe even the entire world, found you of all people attractive aside, the weather meant that you were never in bikinis or cropped shirts and shorts around him.
Those things combined with the fact that you were too scared to have sex with him meant that you had never been in a position where he had been able to catch a glimpse of it, leaving your boyfriend completely in the dark to your tattoo.
Plus, you sort of forgot it was there. After it healed and there was no longer pain or that persistent, unfathomably uncomfortable itch to remind you that you had gotten your skin altered forever, it was out of sight, out of mind.
Those things combined with the fact that you were too scared to have sex with him meant that you had never been in a position where he had been able to catch a glimpse of it, leaving your boyfriend completely in the dark to your tattoo.
Until you finally decided to stop being a nervous wreck and spend the night at his house. It was going to be completely innocent, nothing more than some cuddling and a slightly awkward moment of realization the morning after as you felt morning wood pressing against you for the first time. You were inexperienced, to say the very least.
He offered you some sweatpants with a drawstring and a shirt for you to wear, and since you had dreamed of this since you were 13, you had obliged, trying not to seem to excited at the thought of being in his clothes, enveloped by his scent. It just seemed like something oddly intimate and domestic, something you longed for.
You pulled your pants off and pulled his sweatpants on, tying the drawstring, but the pants still hung a little loose on your hips. You turned your back to him, lifting your shirt off, and just as you started to slip his shirt on, you heard his voice, making you freeze.
"What the fuck is that?" He asked, his obscenity mixed with shock making the sentence come out much harsher and more jarring than he had intended. He wasn't as angry as his tone intended. In fact, he was really fucking turned on and incredibly curious. His sweet, shy little girlfriend was hiding a tattoo in the sexiest spot he could imagine.
"What?" You asked, quickly pulling his shirt down and turning to him, your eyes wide with worry. Your mind, adept at overthinking every micro expression and shift in tone, immediately started running with possibilities, most prominently, that he had seen something about your body that he didn't like.
"The tattoo," he said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "You didn't tell me you had a fuckin' tramp stamp."
"Oh," you replied softly, your blood rushing to your cheeks. Your mind immediately worried that he didn't like it, that maybe it would be a deal breaker or he'd think you were some kind of slut. "I-uh- I don't know..." You tried to explain yourself, stumbling over your words as your mouth struggled to catch up to your brain. "I guess I forgot about it," your excuse sounded pathetic even to your own ears as it left your lips, but you didn't have anything else to say, nothing that wasn't a string of apologies and pleas that he wouldn't leave you, anyway.
"You forgot you had a tattoo on your lower back?" He raised an eyebrow, sitting up on his bed and crossing his arms, his biceps bulging slightly. He didn't mean to sound like an asshole, but it was practically in his DNA. He was working on trying to be gentler with you, realizing when you needed him to be softer and when you liked him acting like sort of a dick, but working on were the operative words in that phrase. He wasn't quite there yet.
"It's just..." You struggled to find the words to explain. Rafe didn't have tattoos. He didn't know how easy it was to just forget that they were there. After a certain point, it just becomes a part of you that you're used to. You don't really think about it or perceive it as much as other people do. "I don't really see it because of where it is, so I- um- well, it's easy to forget that it's there... I guess?" You sounded completely unsure of yourself, to the point that you worried he might think you were lying, whether that was a valid concern or just your anxious brain trying to fuck with you, you weren't sure.
He leaned forward, saying nothing for a moment as his piercing blue eyes regarded you with a scrutinizing stare that made you feel like he could see right through you. You fiddled with the hem off his shirt, biting the inside of your cheek anxiously as your gaze darted around the room—you always overthought how much eye contact was the correct amount. "Turn around," he ordered after a moment, his voice low and gruff. "Let me see. Properly this time."
"What?" You asked, your eyes snapping to his and widening a fraction as you were caught off guard by his demand. You weren't entirely sure what you expected to be honest, maybe to be broken up with, or just chewed out for keeping a secret or getting such a tattoo in the first place, but for some reason, it hadn't occurred to you that he would want to look at it, really look at it.
"Turn around," he said again, his tone leaving no room for argument this time. He didn't like repeating himself, and he especially didn't like feeling like he was missing out on a piece of you, this girl that had taken him completely by surprise and made him forget that anyone else existed. "Now."
Your brain seemed to short circuit, and you stood there for a minute, blinking at him with your lips parted as if you were going to object, but instead, you simply turned around, holding your breath as you entered your natural state of constant worrying.
Your breath hitched slightly, your eyes squeezing shut in fear and anticipation as he gently tugged the shirt up, revealing your back. he tugged the sweatpants down ever so slightly to see the bottom of the tattoo, and you waited for what seemed like forever before finally feeling his warm fingers run along the healed ink.
The image depicted on your skin, like art on a canvass, was two swans, kissing to create a heart with their faces. One of them was lightly shaded, meant to depict a white swan, and the other was darkly shaded, meant to depict a black swan. It didn't have an explicit meaning to you. You just thought it was pretty and really liked swans, the fact that they mated for life speaking to your hopeless romantic heart.
His fingertips traced the line work, a gesture that was sensual and seemed to leave fire in its wake. He stared at it for a long while, such a beautiful and permanent piece of art on his girl in such an indirectly intimate area making something within stir.
"You hate it don't you?" You breathed out, the words falling from your lips in a concerned hurry faster than you could stop it. The silence was suffocating, not knowing what would come after making your skin crawl with anxiety.
"Face me," was all he said. He wanted to look you in the eyes when he said what he had to say, wanted to make sure you really heard him and understood that he meant what he said.
You turned back around to face him, looking down at him as he placed his hands firmly on your hips, pulling you forward to stand between his legs. Your brows were knitted in worry, looking down at him like you were going to burst into tears if he'd started laying into you. You really liked Rafe—it was too soon to say love but... you did—and that mixed with your people-pleaser tendencies made your stomach turn at the thought of upsetting him.
Realistically, you had no reason to be so nervous about his reaction. It was your body, you could do whatever you wanted to it, and you had gotten it before you two even got together, but your brain didn't really care about what was realistic; it only cared about worst case scenario and disappointing people.
"Baby, you are absolutely gorgeous, alright?" He said sternly, already aware that you were preparing yourself for the worst and probably working yourself up about it. "And, fuck, I mean this tattoo... it only makes you more sexy to me. You're fuckin' perfect."
Your cheeks heated up again, not with fear or embarrassment this time but at his compliment. You also visibly relaxed as the clarification that he wasn't mad soothed your nerves a tad. You let out a surprised giggle as he tugged you down onto his lap.
"You got any more sexy little tattoos hidden under these clothes?" He asked flirtatiously, flashing that panty-dropping smirk that made him look ten times more handsome, especially when he was gripping your thigh with one hand and holding you securely against him by your waist with his other.
"No," you smiled, tentatively wrapping your arms around his neck, not knowing if it was as attractive as it seemed in books. "Just that one. Sorry to disappoint," you continued, your voice soft as you bit your lip shyly—one of your many anxious habits.
"Mm," he hummed, dipping his head into the curve where your neck met your shoulder. "Shame," he murmured, placing soft kisses against your skin as you giggled. The tension in the room had completely dissipated, replaced by a lighthearted and flirty atmosphere.
Rafe knew you weren't ready to go further than just kissing, and he was going to wait for as long as you needed him to. Though he'd be lying if he said he didn't get horny at the idea of pounding into you from behind, your tattoo completely exposed for him to gawk at, but he knew baby steps were in order. He needed to get you okay with sex before he molded you into his little personal porn star.
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author's notes .ᐟ   described my own tattoo as the one reader has, but if you have your own or want to imagine it as something else, feel free to do so! i just thought i should describe the tattoo for the story's sake <3
also, i know this is a little different from the giggly and jokey couple we saw in my other anxious!reader x boyfriend!rafe fic, and that is because this is toward the beginning of their relationship. reader is still trying to learn to be more comfortable with rafe enough to be herself and realize that he loves her, even it she doesn't like herself, and rafe has never done the relationship thing, especially not with a girl like reader, so he's still learning to express his emotions and be soft and warm with her the way he wants to and know she deserves.
tags .ᐟ   @starkeysprincess / @cometmultiverse / @iheartjjmaybnk / @all4l0vee / @kissesfrmriri / @bradshawed / @fallbhind / @rafeslittleangel / @bakugouswaif / @fakedhearts / @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 /
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yanderenightmare · 8 months ago
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part two
TW: none? ig
fem reader
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You’re there with a friend, only waiting, holding her stuff—feeling in-the-way posted on the wall as closely as possible, making yourself as small as you could while models and other busy passersby buzzed about back and forth in front of you.
Your friend—one of the many models—had just done her fifth outfit change and was all but running back to the photo shoot. Apparently, the photographer was a real jackass.
Jackass was an understatement. You feared he’d turn around from the white background sheet he was facing, spot you and tell you that you didn’t belong in there and to get the fuck out. He was certainly shouting that same thing to some of the models.
Your friend was then next to bite the bullet—being the fifteenth model he’d sent on their sorry way. 
You’d honestly thought it was for the best—she’d get nothing but scorn modeling for that narcissistic drama queen anyway. You give her your best sympathetic smile as she teeters over. It doesn’t surprise you to see her on the verge of tears. Some of the prior ones had been all but bawling their eyes out, running out of the room as fast as they could. But you couldn't blame them—if anyone were to shout at you that way, you’d most likely have died on the spot.
His eyes fall to the back of the room in frustration—a heavy sigh leaving him. Seems he was out of models already. What a pity until—right there, standing small and almost insignificant next to the changing area, there’s you—the perfect face he’d been needing.
“Oi you, get dressed,” he bites with a finger pointed towards you. But no, he must have changed his mind about your friend who’s standing next to you as you hand her back her clothes.
She brightens up when she notices, dropping her clothes back in your arms to go back, only—
“No, not you,” he very nearly snarls. “You there,” he points again—this time, it isn’t a question of who it’s directed at. “Why aren’t you dressed?”
There’s such a harshness to his tone that you’re almost convinced you’ve done something wrong. But no, you’re not supposed to be dressed.
“I’m not a model,” you call back.
At that, he scoffs. The smile on his face must be the cockiest thing you’ve ever seen in your life.
“Everyone’s a model, sweetheart. We’ll send you a check in the mail.”
Your eyes are round—too stunned to be affronted. He taps his shoe, hardened gaze directed at you, unwavering in wait. You’re almost scared to say no.
“Well? What’s it gonna be?”
It’s only been a few seconds, and still, he sounds as if he’s been waiting forever—exuding impatience on a level you’ve never seen.
You open your mouth to tell him off, but a tug from your side makes you stop.
“You have to,” your friend ushers. “It’ll be trouble for me if you don’t.”
You give her an incredulous look—but she only grabs you and drags you with her into the many rows of clothes, picks out your size, and helps you get into it before you’ve even said another word aside from a pitiful “Wait—” 
Lastly, she applies some light makeup to your face before pushing you out into view of the waiting photographer.
You’re in too deep to be turning back now. Besides, you wouldn’t want your friend to get fired when she works so hard just to have gotten in the same room as the guy before you—so you end up walking over, ever so awkwardly—not used to the height of the cigarette heels.
If he notices, which he most certainly does, he doesn’t say anything.
He seems to have found some patience he lacked, watching you—bearing an expression, almost amused.
You don’t return the favor, looking down as you stop before him.
“So, uhm—what, ugh—” you mumble, on your way to peek behind you, hoping to get some sort of direction from your friend, when he grabs your chin and makes you face him.
Still, he makes no sound—only wetting his thumb with a lick of his tongue before putting it to the outer corner of your eye. You gasp, but it doesn’t deter him as he smudges the eyeliner to his liking. Doing the same with the other eye. He continues until he’s satisfied. Keeping his grasp on your chin, he angles your face here and there slightly while his intense glare rakes over you like he’s a tortured artist chiseling a sculpture to some vision in his head—then hums with a smile, softly, “Perfect.”
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♡ BNHA – Bakugou, Shigaraki, Dabi, Aizawa, Shinso, Overhaul ♡ JJK – Sukuna, Naoya, Toji ♡ HQ – Oikawa, Kageyama if photography was volleybal lol ♡ BLLK – Reo, Rin ♡ AOT – Levi ♡ DS – Akaza, Sanemi
♡ FEM x M INSERT masterlist ♡ GN x M INSERT masterlist
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loveindefinitely · 1 year ago
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༊*·˚ NEED TO LISTEN TO ME — price is disappointed in you and your other three lovers, and finds that some 'training' is in order
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read on ao3.
featuring. simon 'ghost' riley + johnny 'soap' mactavish + kyle 'gaz' garrick + john 'bravo six' price
warnings. nsfw, fem!reader, fmmmm, poly tf141, ANGRY sex, mean dom price, angst, degradation, minor dom/sub, light humiliation, orgasm denial, dacryphilia, minor spit play, minor blood play (not really), rough sex, price orders EVERYONE around, price-centred, whiny johnny and gaz agenda
// NSFW CONTENT UNDER THE CUT //
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You weren't scared of many things at this point in your life.
Being a signal officer for the military certainly aided that statement, but it was more the fact that you had four guard dogs in the form of the most seasoned special forces operatives you've ever known. Four very large, very scary men that you'd somehow found yourself lucky enough to get to call your partners.
Both on, and off, the field.
That being said, there was one thing you were terrified of. Like, to your bones, petrified.
And that thing had a name.
John Price.
He was formally the captain of your force for a reason, but he was also informally the captain of your relationship, as well. The one you all looked to in the most difficult of moments, the one that held reason and guidance above all.
It's been that way since the five of you met, and remains the same to this day.
Nonetheless.
It was a known fact between you, Soap, Ghost and Gaz that none of you liked seeing the man mad. You four could count on one hand the amount of times you'd witnessed it, all of which having been directed at either his superiors or an enemy.
But. Right now, in this office, seated on the small couch between your three lovers?
Yeah. You don't fear many things.
But John Price's disappointment is quite easily in your top three, and this situation only cements it.
"He's probably ordering our caskets," Gaz murmurs wistfully, eyes wide as he stares at his foot, tap-tap-tapping against the wooden floor. It's a nervous tic that gives him away too easily, but even with your hand on his knee, it doesn't seem able to quit.
You exhale a deep breath, squeezing your eyes shut. "I hope he gets me a cute one," you mumble back, tone matching the resignation that clouds your captain's office.
"You four. My office."
Those were the only words Price had spoken to you guys, before marching off to a meeting with Laswell.
To say that you and your lovers were mortified was the biggest understatement of the century.
Even Ghost, sat perfectly still, expression perfectly neutral beneath his mask, oozes trepidation like it's the carbon dioxide he exudes with every breath.
"I know 'm 'n tha military, but I still don't wanna die, ya know?" Soap whines, his head flung back and blue eyes glued to the roof as his hands shake in his lap.
You guys must look like unruly students sat outside of your principal's office to any onlookers, and it should be embarrassing.
It would be, if you could feel anything but mortal peril.
You're about to quip a reply to Soap, when the door clicks open, and the three of you sit ramrod straight, Ghost not moving from his already perfect posture.
Price steps in, the door shutting closed behind him.
The silence is a tangible force, and your mouth is so dry, you'd think you were in a desert, not in your lover's office.
His footfalls echo around the modest space, before he leans against his wooden desk, folding his arms over his chest, before directing his furious gaze to you four.
"When I give orders," he starts, and oh god, his tone, it's so unbelievably firm, "I expect my team to follow them."
There's no response, except for the overwhelming quiet coming from the usually passionate and comforting presence that underlies your entire dynamic.
Price clears his throat, meeting all of your eyes one by one. You wonder if you can see the glassiness of yours, the barely restrained tears.
"So why," he begins, before swallowing once more, determination settling in, "Did all four of my teammates rush into an unstable building after being ordered to keep out?"
You know it's not just the anger of a captain's orders being refused.
It's the anger of a lover having to watch all four of his partner's risk their death, while he can do nothing but watch from the scope of a sniper rifle.
The clock on the wall above the door ticks, and none of you make a sound.
Price grabs a pack of cigars from his pocket, quickly sliding one out, placing it between his lips, and shoving the pack back into his slacks. He then pulls out a lighter from his back pocket, lighting the tobacco, before exhaling his first breath of smoke.
In any other situation, you or Gaz would be chastising him, telling him to stop smoking, or to at least do it outside.
Neither of you say a word.
Rubbing at the furrow between his brows, Price then drifts his eyes to Ghost, the only one who hasn't said a word since the mission.
"What the fuck were you thinking?" Price says on a deep exhale, shaking his head. There's hurt there, genuine pain, and your heart stutters in your chest at the sight. "You're my lieutenant, Simon. I thought you'd at least 'ave the brains to listen to me when I make an order."
Ghost's hand tightens where it sit on his cargos, and even with his mask on, you can tell that a disgruntled frown lays beneath it.
"And you, Soap," he looks at the man to your right, now, and you can physically see him deflate at the disappointment in his captain's eyes. "Disrespecting authority is cute 'nd all, until it's me, mate."
Those words feel like a physical wound, even to you, and judging my Soap's crestfallen expression, for him, it must hurt tenfold.
And, then, it's your turn.
His mouth is set in a grim line, and you hope that he can see the regret, the genuine sorrow you feel at disappointing and -- and scaring your captain. Your lover.
"What were you thinking?" He asks, and your mouth wants to open, but it's as if there's an invisible force pinning it shut. "You weren't even supposed to step foot on enemy grounds, and you knew that."
And it's true. Your role is mainly with communications and technical supplies, not actual combat. You were trained, yes, but it has never been your role.
But you'd seen Soap rush in, Ghost trailing after him, yelling, and then Gaz not long after, and it was like your mind shut out any rational lines of thinking. There was no rationale when it came to your partners.
That was a flaw. A genuine character fault, and Price was cementing that fact in this very room.
"Kyle," Price runs his hand down his face, cigar in between his middle and index fingers, "Kyle."
The pain, regret, the melancholy -- it's its own element in this room, its own being, and it feels as if it's choking you from the inside out. Like a gas leak, or a grenade stuck in your throat, about to go off.
Ghost, shockingly, is the first to speak.
"Captain," he grits out. Not 'old man'. Not 'love'.
Captain.
"We're aware of our... misgivings," he states, the words coming off of his tongue like hot coals he needs to rid off, lest his entire mouth burns.
Price nods, slowly, eyes narrowing at Ghost. It hits you, then, how your lover's just dug all of your graves in one sentence. Gaz seems to realise, too, his eyes going wide, exhaling a low, short breath in surprise.
"Sweetheart," he quips, standing up in the transition of one moment to the next, eyes snapping to your glassy ones. The endearment holds no warmth to it, for the first time, and your heart shatters where it beats in your chest, shards of glass embedding into the muscle surround it. "Get on the desk."
He says the words, and in the next movement, sweeps his arm over his desk, causing all of his papers, his pens, his folders, to go careening to the floor.
Soap mutters a curse under his breath, and Gaz winces.
On shaky legs, you stand, walking the short distance to the wooden surface and sitting on it with short pants of breath.
His large hand grips your chin in a tight grasp, tilting your head back and forcing the eye contact between you both.
He leans in, mouth mere millimetres away from your own, before speaking. You can taste the tobacco as he does. "I'm gonna let every single one of my subordinates fuck your disobedient cunt, and it's not gonna get any cum. Do you understand that order, sweetheart?"
It's cruel. Patronising, and so unbearably condescending, but you nod, a tear finally leaking down your cheek.
With a calloused thumb, he wipes it away in one stroke. "Save that for the actual punishment, operator."
And then, he steps back, and takes a seat in his chair, allowing him a full view of the other three still sat at the couch, and your position in his desk.
"This is a lesson on following your captain's orders," Price barks his order, like most other men of his rank would. It's a stone cold contrast to the gentle, comforting way he usual spoke to the four of you. His voice, now, holds no love, no underlying adoration lacing through his words. "You will follow every command I give you, and hopefully, this training will carry onto our future missions."
You're all aware that if it gets too much, one of you will utter the safeword you're all aware of -- the weight of it almost embedded into your beings.
Price knows it, too. And no matter how angry he is, he'll always put you all first, listen to you when you genuinely need to stop.
The feeling in the room has shifted from one of heavy disappointment, to an electrifying anger that has liquid heat melting to your core.
"Simon," Price snaps his fingers, and it's almost as if you're in a parallel universe, because the large man immediately stands. "Lay 'er down on the desk."
Ghost only needs to take two steps from the couch before he's standing in front of you, hand fisting into your hair, before somewhat gently pushing you to lay flat against the smooth surface. Your breathing is harsh, your chest moving in quick rises.
"Strip 'er down," Price orders, voice gravelly as he takes another deep inhale of his cigar, folding his leg so his left ankle rests on his right knee, legs spread wide. He fills out the chair with his frame, and it makes you shiver as Ghost gets to work peeling your clothes off of you.
When your heated skin feels the kiss of the cool air, you let out a haggard breath, head falling back to hit the wood as you clench your eyes shut.
Ghost goes to spread your thighs, before pausing, awaiting Price's directions like a dutiful dog.
You never thought you'd see the day.
"She's wet enough," Price shrugs, taking another drag of his cigar. "Fuck 'er."
Oh, fuck.
He wasn't lying, you were soaking, something about the fear unknowingly having your inner thighs sticky and core aching to be filled.
But... not getting prepped? At all?
Ghost makes a surprised grunt of a noise, pausing for a moment, before recollecting his senses and unbuckling his pants.
Oh. Fuck.
He's really, properly following Price's directions, like the man had demanded. The guilt was eating all of you alive, and that festered in Simon's actions.
His deep brown eyes flick to yours, before he unzips his fly with one hand, gaze not moving from yours. There's slight apology in them, only a hint, before he leans down to spit on your cunt.
You inhale a sharp breath at the act, squeezing your eyes shut as his dick presses against your heat, rubbing against it slightly.
Then, he pushes in -- it makes you cry out, breath hitching as the tip enters. It's a tight fit, but he continues to push in, and it's almost as if you can feel the intrusion, the pressure in your chest.
"So you can follow orders, huh?" Price quips, almost nastily, and it has you shuddering as Ghost's hips finally flush against your own. You don't think you've ever taken any of them without foreplay, and it's a special form of torture. The pressure is almost too much, his cock filling you up so much.
Simon's head hangs between his shoulders, muscles tense as he stares down at you, the epitome of self-restraint.
He always was the most controlling one, the most calculating.
Not today, however.
That title easily belongs to Price, who merely relaxes further into his seat, as if he wasn't just mere feet away from the two of you.
"I said fuck her, Riley. Not stand there and keep it warm."
He's so fucking. He's fucking cruel about this, fully willing and wanting to make this hurt. It's so completely unlike the man you love, and it's psychologically damning in a way nothing else could be.
But, like directed, Simon fucks you.
He stops trying to be kind about it, stops wallowing in guilt. It's rough, forceful, urgent, unlike the way he usually liked to savour your pleasure, your pain. He usually delighted in the smooth, deep strokes, prolonging the passionate act almost vindictively.
No. Now, it's quick, punishing thrusts, and your head falls back and little moans escape your throat.
It's like you've both forgotten that Soap and Gaz sit on the couch, watching, waiting. Price has likely made it that way on purpose, to make them envy the attention you and Ghost are getting.
"Fuck," you moan, tits bouncing as Simon continues to fuck you relentlessly, harsh in his movements.
"Does he feel good?" Price is standing, and when you open glassy eyes, it's to see his face looking down at you. If you had the mind to, you'd flinch under his criticizing expression. "Answer me."
You nod, shakily, and when his brows narrow, you rush out a verbal response. "Yes, yes, he does!"
Price hums a noncommittal sound, before his hand slides down your stomach, leaving your hairs to stand on end, before his fingers reach your clit. In tight circles, he has you on the edge almost immediately, and you cry out.
"Gonna fuckin' cum," Ghost grunts, voice low as his eyes clench tight.
"Aww, you two close?" Your captain's voice is gruff, all too condescending, and just before you can find your release, his hand leaves your clit, and wraps around Ghost's neck. He leans into his ear, and his whisper is loud enough for everyone to hear. "Pull out."
Simon makes a noise suspiciously close to a whimper, and it's so unlike him that it has your eyes opening wide, before he does just as Price ordered.
He pulls out.
"Seriously?" You groan, filter eviscerated like your high was. You lean up, using your elbows for leverage.
Price raises one brow, before scratching at his beard almost absent-mindedly. "Got a complaint, sergeant?"
You shake your head, lightning quick, like a puppet on a string.
That's what you were right now -- what all of you were. Just puppets in whatever acts Price wanted to see you all star in.
It's exhilarating in the worst of ways.
"Soap, Gaz," Price snaps once more, and Ghost is nothing more than a neglected mutt. Which, really, is almost funny considering the amount of times the man teases you, Soap and Gaz about such a comment. You couldn't count the amount of times he's compare you three to 'needy puppies'.
Now, he was nothing more than that, and you wish you could enjoy that fact more.
The two men adhere to the command, radiating nervous energy as they stand to attention, not unlike they would if they were in a standard military unit.
"Gaz, take her mouth," Price demands, before his hand buries in the short hair near the nape of Soap's head with a mean grip, meant to hurt. Soap barely hides a whine as Price tugs him, forcing the man to his knees as if he's nothing more than the mutt Ghost usually refers to him as. "You, lick 'er clean."
You realise, then, what exactly this is.
It's truly a display of power. Of control. Because you four took that away from him on the field, unrightfully so. There truly is thought behind his anger, his pain.
It only makes the ache in your heart burn, makes it bruise and bleed where the shattered pieces cut and embed into the innerworkings of your body.
This 'training' won't make up for what you four pulled. Not in the slightest.
But it's something to let John get some of his emotions out, in a somewhat healthier way than you lot usually resorted to.
You'd always offer your support, offer yourself, and he knows that.
He's deliberately taking away that option for you, taking control to comfort the side of him that is so deeply ingrained, so deeply relied on for him to live.
You love him. So effortlessly.
Those words remain accurate, even as Johnny first licks over your wet pussy, and Kyle's dick bumps against your lips.
Opening your mouth without a thought, Kyle's tip slips in, his pre-cum salty on your tongue as you flatten your tongue against it. Johnny's as enthusiastic as ever, maybe even more than usual, as he delegates all of his attention to your aching warmth.
John's grip doesn't release from Johnny's hair, shoving his closer against you, and the sight is so hot that you wish you could fully, properly enjoy it.
Another time, when you're all in better spots, happy and unapologetic, you'll ask them to re-enact the scene.
Johnny moans against your pussy, hands coming up to grip at your bare thighs, and you just know there'll be finger-shaped bruises come tomorrow morning. He's always been unaware of his strength, not understanding the proper damage he can inflict, especially in the bedroom. It's attractive as all hell.
"Yeah? She taste good, hm?" John nearly snarls, and you let out a drawn out moan at the pleasure and words. The sound is muffled by Kyle pushing in deeper, having you almost gagging on his length.
Your eyes flutter shut at the onslaught of feelings, but even with no sight, you can feel Simon's eyes on you like a physical weight.
You know what position he's in, without having to look. Leaning against the wall with a furious expression, large arms folded over his bulky chest. Maybe he's pulled off his mask, maybe it's just been hooked over his crooked nose.
"Fuck, cap," Kyle groans, bucking into your throat. "So fuckin' good--"
Johnny muffles a whine as his efforts nearly double, and you swear spots colour the darkness of your vision. You're already there, and it's not like you can say anything, with Kyle abusing your mouth like this.
"She's close, ain't she, Johnny? Feel her clenchin' on your tongue?" John taunts, and you can feel Johnny nod against your core, nose brushing your clit as he does.
John huffs a cruel laugh, before he abruptly pulls Johnny away by the scruff of his neck. You can't help by buck up, searching for touch, but none comes.
"Kyle," John's tone is one requiring no resistance, and with a shaky exhale, Kyle pulls out of your mouth, a string of spit clinging to his dick, before snapping and leaving your cheek covered with a line of it.
You shakily open your eyes, your pussy begging for a release, knowing that you won't get one. Not yet.
"You make a mess, you clean it up," John says.
So, Kyle leans down, his tongue licking over the spit trail, and really it should be disgusting.
Instead, it only makes you wetter.
Your thighs incessantly shake, no hint of stopping as your body aches. The emotional turmoil, mixed with the physical kind -- it's a concoction for torture.
With half-lidded eyes, you watch as John forces Johnny's head in between your breasts, pressing his face into them. It must be almost suffocating, but Johnny manages to whine as you feel John's hand wrap around Johnny's dick, positioning it against your twitching hole.
"Rut into her," John orders, before stepping back.
Johnny does just that -- he thrusts in, bottoming out with one push. Your moan sounds too alike to a squeal at the stretch, the sudden intrusion. Your arms wrap around his back, nails scratching lines down Johnny's back as he thrusts into you almost manically. You're sure that you're drawing blood, but it only seems to encourage the man rutting into you further, his thrusts urgent and feral.
"Jesus christ," someone -- you're sure it's Kyle -- murmurs, and you suddenly want to know what you must look like from a spectator. Ruined, probably.
Your breaths are harried as you feel yourself getting close once more, tears burning at the corner of your vision at the pure need coursing through your veins.
"Please," you whimper, squeezing like a vice around Johnny's dick. "Please, oh god."
"Now you want me to make decisions? Let you two cum?" There's a hand in your hair, and in any other situation, it'd be calming.
Currently, it feels like a thinly veiled threat.
"Please, John, 'm so sorry, please," you beg, eyes blurry as you look up into the man's stormy blue eyes.
Usually, they're comparable to a calm ocean, the beach mid-summer.
Now, they're akin to the darkest of storms, the ones sailors whisper about, the ones that haunt them while they're asleep at sea. Ones that cause shipwrecks to wash up on shores, ones that cause stories to be passed between campers on the scariest of nights.
"Now you're sorry, sweetheart?" And, oh, there's a sliver of the warmth you've come to crave, and it almost has you melting where you lay.
You're so close, you can taste it on your tongue, and your moans get louder, needier, more frantic --
"Stop, Johnny."
Tears fall, then. Hot and heavy down your cheeks, leaving sticky tracks in their wake. Hiccups fall from your lips as you sob from the deprevation.
Johnny whines, head drooped low as he stops, and you can feel him pulse inside of you, both of you at your wits' end.
"You follow orders so well in this room, don't you?" John says. The voice of a captain.
It's almost your last straw. The devastation is too great, the mix of physical and emotion stress weighing on you heavily.
"'M so sorry, shoulda listened," you cry, body trembling.
"John, please, we're sorry," Kyle insists, a furrow between his dark brows where he takes a step closer to you and Johnny.
Simon, although silent, is also closer to you both now than he had been, no longer stood against the wall.
Your boys -- they're so inherently protective, and it's such a nice feeling. No matter how guilty they feel, how genuinely sorry, they can't stand to see you or Johnny so weak, so vulnerable.
Love. You love them, in a way words can never describe.
John exhales. A deep, thoughtful one.
"We're talking about this, after we're all cleaned up," he says. It's the first hint of himself that you've heard tonight, and the relief is like an intoxicating drug.
It's like even the room itself takes a deep breath, dispelling of some of the tension lining every inch of it.
"Off 'er," John snaps his fingers, and Johnny pulls out with a small whimper, head still hung low.
Grabbing your hips, John flips you over, making you bend so your face is to the desk and your ass is in the air. His large hand presses against your lower back, bending you into an arch.
He slides in, and it's an easy entry. You don't think you've been more wet in your life, and gods, you need it.
Setting a ruthless pace immediately, every thrust forces a whimper, a moan, a whine out of your mouth, eyes dazed as your cheek presses against the wood. His hand fists into your hair, forcing your head to face the three men stood side by side, watching you both with a flurry of emotions behind heavy stares.
"Feel so fuckin' good, christ," John seethes, his grip tightening in your hair, causing your moan to become louder as it leaves your lips.
It isn't long before you're at that cliff once more, begging for a final push, just so you can reach that finish you ache for.
"Gonna, fuck, please, let me cum, John, I love you, I'm so sorry," your words aren't fully your own, and they come out in a desperate plea.
"Yeah? My girl gonna cum for me? Needy slut."
Those words are your undoing, your nirvana.
You cum, body strung tight as tears fall down your cheeks once more, your vision nearly blacking out with the strength of your orgasm. It's almost painful, the stimulation altogether too much, and not enough.
John finishes not long after, his cum filling you up with a loud groan from him.
He releases his fist in your hair, and you head falls to the desk, body slumping with the final release of pleasure.
Stroking a smoothing hand down your back, he pulls out, and you can feel his seed leaking down your thighs. You must be a sight -- all worn out and dripping with the white liquid.
"We don't getta cum?" Johnny whines, and you can hear the roll of Simon's eyes.
There's a hand stroking stray hairs off of your face, and from the texture and size of the limb you can tell it's Kyle.
"You won't get to tomorrow, either, if you keep tha' up," Price mutters, and you let out a delusional giggle at his words. You're cum-drunk, almost, from how drawn out your orgasm had been.
"We really are sorry, Cap," Kyle murmurs genuinely, and the hurt is a sharp barb on his tongue. "You know we love you, didn't mean to hurt you."
John releases a long, worn-out breath. "I know that. I do. But you're a bunch of reckless muppets 'nd you fuckin' went too far today. I'm your captain, lover or not."
"We'll talk it over later," Simon states, and you can't help but agree with the sentiment.
You will. And it'll be a painful conversation, but one that you all owe to your captain.
Because, at the end of the day, you four would do anything for the man that you love. That includes the tough words, the difficult exchanges.
John presses a chaste kiss to your forehead, and with complete certainty, you're sure that you're all going to be okay.
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a/n. the day that i stop loving poly 141 is the day that i die. price needs all the love omg this one kinda hurt to write cause oof angst but hopefully it was an enjoyable read!!!! thank you to everyone who comments on my fics, your notes etc make me do a lil happy dance ily all!!!!!!!!!!!!
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llamagoddessofficial · 2 months ago
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What are some ways the Mafia crew would try to further woo their dearest love? And in return, what ways could we further endear ourselves to them?
Scary spooky mafia guys...... trying their hardest to woo a pretty human. AGH it hits all the notes!!!!
Horror gets overwhelmed. You make him so happy, so fuzzy, so warm - but he doesn't believe he can 'woo' you. Not when he can't bear his own reflection, not when even his Dust and Killer consider him violent and frightening. Horror believes his affection for you is his only redeeming quality. He doesn't think you'll like him, but he literally can't stop himself from trying, so when he has his heart set on you his methods are... surprisingly slow and tentative. Especially considering how mercurial he usually is. He brings you flowers that made him think of you, he makes you food, he pores over his brother's dating manual and panics when something happens that he hasn't read about. He's nervous to even hold your hand in case he scares you; the other skeletons are so handsome and eloquent and flirtatious, how could he ever compare? If he frightens you off, he'll never get you back. He has to be gentle.
How could you endear yourself to Horror? Tell him how handsome he is. Tell him how often he's charming without realising. Compliment his cooking. It really won't be that hard, he's already head over heels, but hearing that you like him means so much.
Dust... does not struggle with wooing. Sorry Horror. Dust is frightening, certainly, but his quietness gives him an undeniable magnetism. Like a wolf - sure, you can see his sharp teeth when he smiles, you can see the moonlight flash in his empty eyes. But when he draws close... you can't help but want to move nearer, and touch his soft, silver pelt. Compared to the other three, his romancing is much more underhanded, more about you than grand gestures toward you - which can honestly be a relief when you're being pursued by such big personalities. He turns on the charm, talks quietly and sweetly, stands just a little too close to be platonic, rents your favourite movie when you're down, and (most importantly) positioning himself as your friend and confidant against the other bad guys. He clearly doesn't want to be involved with them, and it's easier to keep you close if you trust him more.
Dust is won over by sincere affection and compliments. For all that looming and flirting, he sure does fall apart quickly when you look right into his eyelights and tell him you like having him around. At that point, he's all yours.
Killer firmly believes that if he can make you laugh, he can make you love him. It's all about getting those giggles, baby. Whatever kind of jokes you like is the kind he tells, he's impressively quick on the draw and never runs out of material, on occasion you may have to ask him to stop joking because your cheeks and abdomen hurt from laughing. He's careful not to be too much... he knows when to be bombastic, when to just be a bit silly and teasing, and when to offer a shoulder to lean on because you're not in the mood. His romantic side is obviously going to be in full force - bouquets, sweets, cards, dates - but his number one wooing technique is getting you to smile. The world you've been unwillingly dragged into can be truly terrifying, and even with the skeletons surrounding you, you'll no doubt feel the nerves and pressure. Killer's humour is a welcome distraction.
It's... hard to tell what endears you to Killer. Honestly, it's hard to tell what Killer is ever thinking. How do you know what's real affection, and what's just a way of making you feel comfortable around him? How can you tell when he's not acting anymore? Though, if you look at how hard he's working every single day to make you that little bit happier... maybe it's not possible to be any more dear to him than you already are.
Nightmare likes to throw his money around. He has an incredible skill for catching when you really like something, reading your face for even the subtlest shine in your eyes, and no matter how much you try to cover your reactions he will catch when you want something and buy it for you. ... But that's not his only wooing trick. Nightmare is, to most people, a violent and unpleasant man who lets his temper take him wherever it pleases. But once he understands his feelings for you and fully commits to romance, he's charming. Lethally charming. He was raised a prince, after all, Dream isn't the only one who has a way with words. You'll start a simple conversation with him, and then you blink and you're sitting on his desk in his study telling him things you've never told anyone. You'll go to him specifically trying not to be swayed - and then when you snap back to reality the two of you are sharing a very luxurious bottle of wine in his room and you've just agreed to be his plus one to a gala this weekend. After all, if he wants to buy you another eye-wateringly expensive necklace, he's going to have to convince you to try some on first.
Nightmare appreciates any attempt to get to know him. His whole life, he's felt like he's living in Dream's shadow, so when you try to actually understand and learn about Nightmare he gets as flattered as he does flustered. Find out about his favourite painters and musicians, read his favourite books, ask him about himself. No one ever has before.
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moonstruckme · 3 months ago
Text
Thawing Out
collab with @ellecdc
part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8 | part 9 | part 10 | part 11 | part 12 | part 13 | part 14 | part 15 | part 16
cw: modern au, some mature themes (in that it vaguely references past smut), allusion to past abusive dynamics/child abuse, thoughts of being undeserving and general emotional overwhelm
poly!wolfstar x fem!reader ♡ 2.2k words
Sirius becomes aware of his trembling while you’re waiting for your score. It’s not unusual, he could tell himself, just the adrenaline of a big performance working its way out of his system, but he knows better. 
Seeing his parents shouldn’t bother him. It doesn’t, really—his tolerance for their shit is certainly lower than when he lived in their house, but he’s not as scared of them as he used to be either. Sirius isn’t sure what’s rattling him so badly now. Maybe it’s you. You and Remus, his team. 
Last night felt like a dream. It would have been easy to believe the two of you had been drinking as he had earlier, the way you’d moved together as though in a trance, heavy kisses and sweet, curious touches and the sort of words Sirius has only ever heard in his fantasies. After, when Remus thought you were both asleep, he’d pressed a kiss to your forehead and trailed his fingers through Sirius’ hair like Sirius was a gift to touch. 
Sirius stayed half awake through most of the night, blissfully aware of every soft noise Remus made in his sleep, every shift of your body against his. It really was like a long dream, hazy and wonderful. Too good to last. 
Waking felt only right. Sirius is not and never has been accustomed to hoping for better than he deserves. And reality is still better; he’s lucky to have it.
By the time he was fully conscious you and Remus were already moving, seemingly in the midst of a panic Sirius didn’t feel any particular need to contribute to. Competition loomed. The two of you seemed at war for who could be the sweetest and most prepared, each bringing caddies of drinks and each trying to sweeten his coffee enough to make it comparable to his beloved caramel latte from back home (neither of you were successful, but Sirius appreciated the effort nonetheless). You’d been fidgety and Remus reticent, but none of you had spoken about the night before. Sirius thought maybe it was best that way; he’d likely play the memory over in his head for the rest of his life, but he’d never ask anything more from either of you than a single night. Remus had been trying to soothe him and you’d been, at best, curious; it didn't have to mean anything. Sirius’ feelings were raw and unruly, but they weren’t your problem. You hadn’t signed on for that. He could tuck them back away. 
Then his parents had reared their ugly heads. You’d spoken when Sirius couldn’t—shouted, really. You were ferocious, a force of nature, and then Remus’ voice had been hard as steel when he’d told them to leave. He’d sent the two of you ahead, Sirius still reeling and you trying to steady him, and Remus returned having kicked Sirius’ mother and father out of the rink. (Kicked out! A teenage Sirius would have laughed for days.) You’d stood up for him, really defended him, the both of you. 
The knowledge had grounded him enough to hone his hurricane of emotions into determination just before your names were announced. On the ice, Sirius felt your stare as well as Remus’, on him and on each other, and it felt like his lungs were suddenly getting more air than they ever had before. He’d done his best to channel all of it into the routine, and then he was in the kiss and cry, both of your arms around him and this odd feeling shooting all the way down into his fingertips. 
He registers your score only distantly. It places you second, at least for the time being. There are a few pairs who still have to compete. 
Sirius is happy. He thinks he is, at least, he’s got everything he could possibly want. Two of the best people he’s ever known raining affection down on him like a torrent, a real chance at medaling in the Olympics, and his parents forced to watch it on TV instead of from the stands. He’s so happy he’s shaking with it. 
“Sirius.” You’re smiling at him, tears in your eyes, but there’s an uncertainty about your expression. “Are you okay?” 
Sirius’ throat tightens, but he speaks through it, squeezing your shoulders and trying to mirror your excitement. “Yeah. Aren’t you?” 
Evidently, his performance isn’t as persuasive as he’d like. Your brows bunch. “Of course I am, but…” 
To your credit, you’ve never brought up Sirius’ parents after he moved out. Sirius will sometimes joke about it, and you’ll laugh along, but you don’t push him to talk about the things he’s not ready for. He can see you battling that instinct now, trying to decide whether to leave him be or push the issue when you know something’s wrong. 
“Let’s get away from here,” says Remus in his usual calm way. He touches a hand between your shoulder blades, encouraging you out of the kiss and cry, knowing Sirius will follow. There’s a short hallway, at the end of it the press room, but Remus steps into a locker room halfway down. 
Sirius frowns. “We have to go take questions—” 
“They can wait,” Remus says. He sits down on a bench, stretching his leg out in front of him. “Do you need a few minutes?” 
Sirius feigns confusion, shaking his head. “I’m fine.” 
Remus is unconvinced. “You didn’t really have time to process before going out on the ice. I can’t…I don’t know all about what happened out there, but if it were me I imagine I’d need a while to sort myself out.” 
Sirius feels a familiar ire rising up in him, the itch for a good brawl. “Your imaginings aren’t a lot to go off, though, are they? I don’t need anything.” 
“Sirius,” you say, softly. Without warning, or without any warnings Sirius can discern, you wrap your arms around him. The stretchy material of your costume slides against his, your wrists crossing over his back and palms flattening by his shoulder blades. After a second Sirius starts to feel like a prick for not hugging you back, so he does. 
“Don’t,” you murmur, chin pushing into his shoulder. “You’re shaking.” 
So, that’s obvious then. 
Sirius holds you close, and he wonders if he could do more. This—hugging—has always been a privilege he felt like he hadn’t earned, but it’s not new. Is he still allowed to kiss you? If he pressed his nose to your neck and stayed there, would you push him away? 
He needs you to stroke his hair, or for Remus to call him one of his treacly pet names, to know that these looks passing between you mean something. 
“I’m okay,” he says, just as softly. “My parents can’t get to me like that anymore.” 
Remus has that infuriatingly attractive perceptive look again, tinged now with sadness. He asks gently, “What’s the matter, then?” 
“I…” Sirius shakes his head. He has the urge to think up a lie, something like I’m sore from all the fucking last night or my left sock is bunched horribly in the toe of my skate, but then you’re letting him go, looking up at him, and Sirius finds that he feels not trapped but safe between your gazes. “I’m confused.” 
You blink, surprised, but Remus looks as though he understands. “You mean about…” 
“Yeah.” 
“Oh, god.” Remus lets out a heaving sigh, some tension Sirius hadn’t noticed in his posture releasing. “Me too.” 
It’s so unlike him that Sirius laughs. Remus chuckles, too, and you join in somewhat bemusedly. Uncertainty still hangs in the room, but there’s no awkwardness between you. How could there be?
“We didn’t really have the chance to talk anything over, did we?” asks Remus. 
“Did we not?” You’re looking between them, seeming genuinely perplexed. 
Sirius raises an eyebrow at you. “Not that I recall. I seem to remember the bloody Olympics getting in the way.” 
Remus laughs again. You look as surprised as Sirius by this; it’s probably as unwound as you’ve ever seen him. Sirius thinks he could get drunk on the sound. 
“I just…” You smile, tentatively. “I thought we talked about it last night.” 
Sirius leans his shoulder against the wall, trying to read you. “What do you think we talked about last night?” 
“We…didn’t you say…” Your brows draw together for a few moments before your expression shifts, eyes widening. “Was it just sex?” 
Sirius’ heart clenches. He shakes his head. He hates—hates—putting his feelings out to be inspected and judged, but he can’t leave you out here by yourself. “Not for me.” 
“We were the ones who sprung it all on you,” Remus tells you gently. “It would be understandable if you thought it was only for the night.” 
Your arms wrap around your middle, and you’re rubbing your lips together again. Sirius really wishes he could kiss you. He wants, suddenly desperately, to stop talking about all of this and go straight back to bed; he doesn’t care if he’s the one who brought it up. He’ll take whatever he can get with both of you. 
“I…was confused, at first,” you admit. “I hadn’t really considered it before, but I think maybe I just hadn’t let myself consider it? I don’t know if that makes sense.” 
Your voice is getting smaller as you talk. Sirius can’t stand it. 
“It does,” he says. “Listen, as far as I’m concerned, whatever you want it to be, it can. I don’t want to lose either of you.” 
No one has ever spoken up for Sirius the way you both did today. Whatever kind you decide to make it, there’s love between you. It’s better than he deserves, but he won’t give it up. 
“Sirius.” Remus’ tone is so laden with sympathy Sirius can’t stand it. He doesn’t want to look at him, at either of you, but he’ll never not rise to a challenge. The amber eyes that meet his are warm enough to melt in. 
“You couldn’t lose us,” Remus says simply. 
Sirius’ hands begin shaking worse than ever. 
“Obviously not.” You look almost offended. No longer small, though, so he supposes he’ll take his wins where he can get them. “I love you. I love both of you. I didn’t really think about how or—or in what way until recently, but that’s not going to change. I’m always going to care about you guys. Still, I…I would like to try.” You grow bashful again. Sirius catches’ Remus’ lips twitching at the change. “It wasn’t just sex for me.” 
Sirius’ heart inflates. You both look to Remus. He looks surprised to be considered, as if you might’ve forgotten he was there. 
“It was never just that for me,” he says, in that blunt way you can only ever really surprise out of him. Sirius feels himself beginning to smile, trying to quell it so Remus can finish. The other boy starts choosing his words more carefully, “I didn’t think…I didn’t want to presume anything, but I think I’ve wanted for more with the both of you for…well, probably since that first week.” His gaze drifts downward, brows pinching concernedly. “Oh, love, stop shaking. Come here, you’re alright.” 
Sirius would be a fool to turn down an offer like that. He pushes off from the wall, going to sit beside Remus on the bench. You follow, sitting on Sirius’ other side and snaking your arms around his waist in a tight hug while Remus’ arm comes to rest across his shoulders. The weight of both of you is strangely reassuring; again, Sirius has that feeling, that he’s not trapped but engulfed. Embraced. 
“I’m sorry,” you mumble, lips to his shoulder. “They shouldn’t have been here.” 
Sirius lifts a hand, bringing it around your head to where a few pieces of hair have begun rebelling against the style you’d put it in for competition. He runs one between his fingers, because he can. 
“It’s really okay,” he says. “I’m not upset. I don’t know why I’m still reacting like this. I feel fine.” 
Remus makes a considerate humming sound. “It’s been a long day.” 
“It’s not even noon,” you point out. 
Sirius laughs, and the two of you do, too, holding onto each other despite your exhaustion. 
“A lot has happened,” Remus amends. “We can relax now, though, yeah? No more parents, no more competition. You’ve done the best you can, and it was amazing, truly, but now you can ease up.” 
Sirius is beginning to feel better, some unknown part of him unspooling. There was the disbelief, the hazy dream of last night. Then the fraught, tremulous happiness of morning, charged looks and harsh words spoken not at but for each other. And then there’s this. New, precious, but it doesn’t feel delicate. It feels like the rush of lowering you into a death spiral and knowing he can trust you to bear it. Knowing you can trust him to keep you up. 
You sigh. “We still have to talk to the press, though.” 
“Oh, that’s not so bad.” Remus’ arm tightens around Sirius’ shoulders, squeezing. There’s a smile in his voice. “You’ll do great. Who wouldn’t love the two of you?”
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helluvapoison · 1 year ago
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Nice To Eat You
[ii]
The Vees x Cannibal!Reader
warnings: drugs, suggestive, rosie slander, dark themes, violence, security shenanigans and, hello, cannibalism
heads up: if you didn’t know, the people of cannibal town are hellborn; born in hell, never lived on earth, never sinned! their life spans are unknown(?) but seem to age as a human would, unlike other demons
Cannibal town has been off limits to The Vees, courtesy of Vox, ever since the incident with you know who. Meeting you was a suspicious surprise for them. You were kicked out of said town by Rosie for giving cannibals a bad name. Can you fucking believe the irony!?
ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ
˚✧₊⁎ Vox ⁎⁺˳✧༚
• Suspicious might be an understatement
• For the longest time, Vox is unnerved by you for every other reason than your appetite. Anyone associated with Rosie is an adversary by proxy. If you take Alastor out of the picture, Rosie is still an Overlord and all Overlords will inevitably crumble to The Vees– even if they don’t know it yet
• There’s an expression for that though, isn’t there? Keep your enemies close. That’s exactly how Vox went about dealing with you
• Gives you a job as his security guard. Hell knows he needs one, what with the price of fame and all, those dirty fucking sinners that try and touch him wherever he goes
• It’s a slow development because neither of you initiate conversation
• Vox is beyond used to the rotating door of demons in and out of his life. He abandons the names of anyone that isn’t you, Velvette or Valentino (Angel Dust and Alastor he can’t forget against his will)
• Becoming attached to you while simultaneously waiting for the other shoe to drop is fucking awful. It feels it like a bug in his system, annoys him to the point his screen starts glitching one day
“Just what the fuck are you up to!? I know you’re with Rosie–”
You knew, on some level, Vox didn’t trust you all the way but it didn’t bother you because he hardly seems to trust anyone. So you cut him off with a mix of a snort and a scoff,
“Rosie? Rosie’s a cunt. She gave me the boot years ago, haven't seen her since.”
Involuntarily, he begins to smile, “Years, huh?”
• Trust is another slow endeavor. Now that Vox doubts your motives slightly less than before, he can silently appreciate the fact you do a damn good job of keeping demons away from him. Bonus: if you happen to take a chunk out of them for shits and giggles, blood never touches his pristine self
• “I believe I owe you an apology,”
“Am I going to get one?”
• In a way, sure, but you’ll be sorely disappointed if you thought it was with words. He invites you to dinner. From that moment until you arrive at the restaurant, he’s reveling in the constant state of shock you seem to be in
• Your eyebrows jump when the waiter nervously lifts the lid from your plate and reveals ribs. Real, demon ribs
“Surprised?” Vox asks rather smugly
“Somewhat,” You return his sly smirk, “Most can’t stomach my… indulgences.”
“I don’t have a stomach. I think I’ll be just fine.”
˚✧₊⁎ Velvette ⁎⁺˳✧༚
• Vel doesn’t give two steaming shits about Rosie or her backwards, unflattering town so long as it doesn’t interfere with her enterprise. Vox’s grudges are his own. If The Vees got hellbent and demented over each other’s EOTD (Enemy Of The Day) nothing would get done!
• During a pathetic comment war on the her social, a few threats became too detailed for Vox’s liking
• A cannibal wasn’t his first choice– or second, or third– but you’d certainly scare off anyone trying to hurt his business partner!
• Velvette’s far from worried about being lunch when she meets you.
• “You’re my–? No. Absolutely not! I can’t be seen with this.” She gestures to all of you
“You’re not exactly making me drool either,” You mutter under your breath
• Judging by the looks of her partners’ faces, stunning Velvette to silence was impossible. Key word: was
• It didn’t last long and hasn’t stopped since
• She pulled out every trick in the book to get you to quit. She gave you a uniform to wear during your shifts, tossed fabrics at you until you turned into a living clothes rack, forced you to hold her phone during her live streams but criticized and berated the way you did
• For fucks sake, she even screamed at Vox to let her fire you!
• You didn’t need her to like you and that was as obvious as it was infuriating. She was Velvette! Everyone loved her! Having you around was like a black eye; literally bruising her ego and bad for business
• Or so she thought
• She made you stand in the shadows of her studio so you wouldn’t frighten anyone and ruin photoshoots with your “freaky face” she so eloquently put it.
• Velvette was mid fashion crisis, yelling at Joanne for the gazillionth time, when you approached from behind
“I’m taking my lunch.”
“Fucking fantastic! Here, have Joanne since she insists on being fucking useless!”
Playing along, you let a guttural growl rip from your throat, making Joanne jump high in the air.
She squeaked and shook her head vigorously, holding her hands in surrender, “I-I’ll be better, I swear!”
• Her candy cane eyes widened in delighted surprise. How had she been so blind to your potential usefulness!?
• Velvette could get high off the new game she created with you. It was like having a scary guard dog– only better dressed to aesthetics. Paparazzi didn’t dare touch her now, standing at a respectable distance that made her more unattainable and desirable than before
• Her attitude change makes her like-able to you too, she’s heaps more pleasant to be around now. You don’t mind doing the extra stuff that wasn’t in your contract like being a dress up doll, dealing with the pet names or escorting her to events. She knows and takes advantage of this instead of saying how she feels
• “You’re my arm candy now, dollface! You go where I go.”
“I hardly think I qualify as arm candy,” You mumble to her, overtly aware of how she holds you close to her
“If you’re fishing for compliments, fuck off to another pond. I don’t waste my free time with uggos,” She says seriously, abruptly smiling as a camera flashes in her direction, “Now get ready. Fans have been dying to get a picture with me lately and if anyone smudges this dress with their dirty fucking fingers, I want you to bite them off!”
“Anyone that touches you won’t have hands tomorrow,” You promise
• You swear she shivers upon hearing that
˚✧₊⁎ Valentino ⁎⁺˳✧༚
• The easiest by far to get along with. In a mortifying way
• Val is fairly accepting of all Hell’s creatures. It’s typically followed up by something sexual but, hey, you’re not in a position to complain, not when no one else in Hell would willingly sign up to work with a cannibal. Especially one outside the confines of Rosie’s civil town
• Rosie’s loss is his gain
• You would be lying if you said you weren’t expecting him to turn horror-struck but he barely blinks when you explain what you did to get exiled. Your savage methods intrigue him, a plethora of potentials just waiting to be explored. In fact, he goes a step further to praise you for being different
• “Hell would be deathly boring if everyone thought the same way, darling. That’s what makes you so… alluring.” He rolled his tongue with the last word, dragging it out and making it ring in your ears
• You’d been called many things in your afterlife, but never that
• You feel rather useless at the moth’s side. You were supposed to be protecting him but he could take care of himself just fine. Val was about the tallest in every room (if not the tallest) with guns hidden under his coat that he never used
• Later you’d understand he only reached for them as a last resort, when his head was unclouded by blood lust
• If you ever voiced your complaints, he’d be quick to reassure you that you make him look good. What powerful Overlord doesn’t have bodyguards? (Do. Not. Answer.)
• However the day does come when you prove your services have merit. On set of all places! A coked up Hellhound didn’t take kindly to Val’s directions, sending a demon wielding a boom mic flying towards him
• Valentino dodged the demon with ease, whipping around and aiming his pistol to put the dog down. Instead he saw you pushing the mutt’s face into the ground, his arm pinned at an angle. Your sharp teeth were bared at his throat, drool dampening his fur
• But you made no moves without Valentino’s say-so
• There’s a lot he could say about the scenario you provided him and how it made him feel– but he only calls your name, beckoning you back to his side
• Where you belong
• “You’re lucky I don’t like hair in my food,” You growl in the Hellhound’s ear before following after Val
• Valentino may be a mastermind of porn and sex but he knows the real way to a demon’s heart, it’s is the universal love language
• Unbothered by blood, he’ll sit pretty and poised on his loveseat while you tear into the meal he provided you. A thanks for a job well done
• “You’ll never go hungry now that you’re with me, monstruo,” The pet name is dripping with adoration, “I won’t waste you like that bitch did. Look at you, you’re already so special.”
~
╰(*´︶`*)╯♡ i lost the request that went to this but i hope it reaches them. cannibal!reader got that rizz, huh?
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pedroscurls · 6 months ago
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training partners (pt. 3)
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summary: you continue to spend more time with hugh, realizing just how different your lives are and while it scares you, hugh does a great job at reassuring you. pairing: hugh jackman x fem!reader warnings: implied age gap (hugh is 55, reader is in late 20s-early 30s), reader has some description (hair, outfit), angst - mentions of a past toxic relationship (gaslighting) reader thinks too much and has insecurities, suggestive smut (brief oral - f receiving), no use of y/n. word count: 3.9k a/n: ok, so this relationship is moving fast but let's be honest, i feel like hugh would definitely know a good thing when he sees it lol. this is purely fictional! i mean no disrespect to hugh jackman (it's the only way i can live out my fantasies of this man lol). prev part. - next part.
You wake up the sounds of Hugh’s quiet snores. You still can’t believe you spent the night. One of his arms is draped over your waist and you’re very aware of the lack of clothing between the both of you. True to his word, Hugh devoured you last night. His tongue, his lips, his fingers– the man knew exactly what he was doing. You were hesitant at first, seeing him between your legs, mouth inches away from where you needed him the most. He could sense your nervousness and had gently placed a soft kiss on the inside of your thigh. 
It was such a simple act, but it provided all the reassurance you needed. Hugh was the first ever person to go down on you and you fear that he’s ruined it for you. If this didn’t work out, you’re sure that there won’t ever be another man to do it like him.
You’re lying on your back, arm resting over his. He looks so peaceful, so unbothered by the responsibilities and realities of the world. His snores even provide a level of comfort that you know can lull you back to sleep. It had only been a week since meeting him and while you certainly didn’t plan for any of this to happen, you can’t imagine it being any different. 
You liked Hugh. A lot, and it scared you. Not because you didn’t think you weren’t ready to get into another relationship, but because your worlds were just vastly different. 
But you remember what he said yesterday and it brings a smile to your lips.
“I don’t want this to be casual.”
You turn slightly to face him, watching as he moves with you, lying on his back instead as his arm drops from your waist. You lie on your side, bringing your fingertips to gently run across his chest. He’s still snoring, but you can’t help but notice the marks you left on his body. The scratch marks on his arms and you’re sure there are more on his back. 
This doesn’t feel real. It’s like you’re in some kind of dream and you’re afraid to wake up, not wanting this to end. Yesterday had been one of the best days you’ve had in a very long time and you had Hugh to thank. Not only was the sex amazing, but the conversations and laughter you both shared was just as great. 
You know you shouldn’t be comparing Hugh to your ex-boyfriend, but you can’t help but reflect on just how different they both were. Whenever you were talking, Hugh always made sure to keep his attention fully on you, eyes staring into yours, hand holding yours or resting on your back. With Hugh, you felt seen. You felt heard. You felt like your voice mattered. 
With your ex-boyfriend, you always felt like you were bothersome. He had always been very short with you, always on his phone, and very disinterested in what you had to say. Towards the end of your relationship with him, you had learned to keep quiet, learned to keep your thoughts and opinions to yourself. It wasn’t until the relationship ended that you realized just how much your ex-boyfriend gaslit you and your emotions. 
But with Hugh… You felt validated. You had to wonder if it had to do with the age difference. Your ex-boyfriend was just a year older than you; with Hugh being much older, you couldn’t help but think about all of the life experiences he must have gone through to get to where he is now. 
With Hugh, you feel so much more grounded. 
Wanting to surprise him with breakfast, you slowly climb out of bed and pull on your panties. You carefully tiptoe into his closet, making sure not to make too much noise. You pull on one of Hugh’s white button down shirts and slip it on, buttoning just a few buttons to at least cover yourself up. 
Then, you leave his bedroom and make your way to his kitchen. You don’t know if this is overstepping any boundaries, but you wanted to do something nice for him, especially after yesterday. 
You’re taken aback by the view of the city again. Hugh was right, watching the sunset last night was worth staying. His kitchen is so much larger than yours and you’re not sure where he keeps his pots and pans, so you open the cupboards to try and find them. When you do, you grab one large pan and place it on top of his stove and then open his fridge. You see a carton of eggs and a bag of spinach that you take and place on the counter. You remember that Hugh’s on a strict diet, so what’s healthier than an egg and spinach omelet? 
You also see his coffee machine in the corner and your eyes light up in excitement. Having been a barista all throughout your college years, you knew your way around a good coffee machine. 
It takes you about twenty minutes to finish cooking and making coffee. You’re about to set the table when you hear footsteps round the corner. You look up at him to see that he’s completely shirtless, but that he has put on a pair of sweatpants that hangs low at his hips. His hair is slightly disheveled and he’s yawning, but when his eyes meet yours, there’s a large grin that forms on his lips.
“Did you make me breakfast?” he calls out, walking over to you. 
“And coffee,” you point out. “I hope you don’t mind,” you say nervously. “I wanted to do something for you since yesterday was just such an amazing day and–”
Hugh interrupts you and cups your cheeks in his large hands, bending down to press his lips against yours softly. “I don’t mind at all, love.” Then, he pulls back enough to look down at what you’re wearing and he bites his lower lip. “And I certainly don’t mind this at all.” 
You feel the heat rise in your cheeks as you move to rest your hands on his broad chest. “I couldn’t find my shirt, so…”
“You could’ve also just walked around naked,” Hugh winks. “That would have been just as an amazing sight as this.”
You roll your eyes playfully and pull away from him, but he takes your wrist and pulls you back into his arms. 
“Wait,” he says quietly. 
“Hm?” 
“Good morning,” Hugh smiles, kissing your forehead. “Yesterday and last night was… It was wonderful.” 
“It was the best day,” you say softly, leaning into him. “One of the best I’ve had in a while.” 
“I can get used to having you here,” Hugh admits. “Is that– Am I moving too fast here?” 
You shake your head and run your hands to his chest and arms, gently squeezing his biceps as you bite your lower lip. “No, I just–” you sigh. “What if you get tired of me?” 
“I won’t,” Hugh reassures you. 
“But what if–” you shake your head, trying to force the negative thoughts out. You realize it’s lingering in the back of your mind. “You’re you and I’m me.” 
Hugh’s hands move to your hips, gently squeezing them. “He really hurt you, didn’t he?” Hugh asks quietly. 
“Hugh…” 
“I’m not him, baby.” 
“I know you aren’t.”
“Good because I know a good thing when I see it,” Hugh affirms. 
You bite your lower lip and look deeply into his eyes, feeling your heart swell at his words and at the sight of him. You can tell how serious he is, how his gaze doesn’t falter. “I like being here. With you,” you admit. “And I’m not just saying that because the sex is amazing.”
“But that’s one of the reasons, isn’t it?” Hugh winks, letting out a quiet chuckle. “You know, I haven’t slept that good in a very long time. Something about having you next to me brought me a lot of comfort.”
“You have a way of words, don’t you?” You smile, leaning up to gently peck his lips. 
Hugh laughs quietly and pulls away from you to walk over to the plate of food. “I just tell the truth, baby.” 
You roll your eyes and sit on the stool, looking up at him as he takes a bite of the egg and spinach omelet you created for him. He lets out a quiet groan of approval and looks in your direction, grinning. 
“So, you can cook too?” 
“And make coffee,” you wink. 
Hugh arches a brow and takes a sip of his americano, brows raising upwards. “Wow. Yeah, I need you around here like… All the time. Can we arrange that, you think?” 
“Hmm,” you look up in thought, resting an elbow on the island. “I will need some closet space, a corner on your bathroom counter–”
Hugh lets out a laugh and sets his fork down to walk towards you, turning your body on the stool until your back is resting against the counter and his hands rest at either side of you, caging you in. He bends down so that you’re at eye level with him, a smirk lining his lips. 
“Whatever you want, baby, you’re gonna get.” He leans in, brushing his lips against yours. 
You move to wrap around arms lazily around his shoulders and stare into his eyes, running your fingers through his hair. “You should finish your breakfast. You’re bulking up for Wolverine, so you need your calories.” 
“I also need some cardio too,” Hugh grins. “Wanna join in on the session?” 
You bite your lower lip in anticipation and nod slowly. “Meet you upstairs?” 
Hugh shakes his head and moves his hand to your hips, lifting you off the stool with ease and placing you on the edge of the counter. “No, baby, gonna need you to wait right here for me.” 
“Like a good girl?” you ask, bringing your hands to play with the buttons 
Hugh grins and nods, continuing to eat as he stares at you,eyes dropping to see your legs cross over one another. Then, he reaches out and taps your knee. “Leave ‘em open for me.” 
You nod and then spread your legs for him, looking up at him in excitement.
Hugh’s eyes narrow and he takes the last bite of his omelet. He sets the plate in the sink and then walks to stand between your legs, reaching up to undo the button on the shirt you’re wearing. Once it opens, he clears his throat and moves his hands to push the shirt off your shoulders, exposing your chest to him. 
“Gonna have an early morning dessert, if ya don’t mind, baby.” Hugh smirks, hooking his fingers into your panties and sliding it down your legs. “Been thinking about this since last night. Tastes so good,” he growls. 
Then, Hugh dips down between your legs and you feel eyes roll in the back of your head once his tongue darts out to taste you. 
It’s been a full week since you spent the night and Hugh craves more and more of having you in his home with him. It’s been a very long time since he’s felt like this and he’s known to fall hard and fall fast, but he’s being careful this time around. He doesn’t want to push you if you aren’t ready, but he can’t help the way you make him laugh and smile, how he feels more at calm with you by his side, and how excited he gets whenever he falls asleep with you in his arms because he knows he’ll wake up with you by his side. 
Hugh knows that he’s going to get busier as the months pass, knowing that for the next year, he’s going to be focused on preparing to come back as Logan. While it should deter him from continuing to see you and committing himself to a relationship, it surprises him that it doesn’t. He isn’t the type of person to take things for granted and he always went after what he wanted, and you– Well, you have been such a nice surprise and he can’t even think about the possibility of letting you go. 
He thinks back to the last time you were here, teasing him about how you would need closet space and an area in his bathroom for your things. You might have been joking, but Hugh takes it seriously. He’s already given you more than enough space in his closet, walking inside to see the vacant space along the wall. He stands there, arms crossed over his chest, as he imagines your things here with his. 
Hugh’s mind drifts when he hears his phone ring. He looks down at it and sees your contact name; he always smiles at it: Swole-mate 💪
“Hi, baby,” Hugh answers immediately. He can’t ignore the way his heart rate speeds up, his stomach doing flips in excitement just to get a chance to hear your voice. “You almost here?” 
“Yeah, just a few minutes out,” he hears you say. “Are you sure spending the weekend is okay?” 
Hugh leaves his closet and begins descending the stairs to greet you. “If I had it my way, you’d be here for more than just the weekend.”
With the silence that comes from you, Hugh just knows that your mind has drifted and so when you pull into his driveway, he hangs up the phone and waits until you park to approach you. Once you climb out of your car, your eyes meet his and Hugh smiles, walking towards you. 
“Your mind just doesn’t shut off, does it?” Hugh says, taking your hand and gently pulling you to him. “What’s goin’ on in that beautiful head of yours, baby?” 
“Nothing,” you sigh, resting your cheek against his chest as your arms come up to wrap around him. You feel safe with him, but you know that you both need to have a serious conversation about where this will go. He had mentioned to you that his schedule was going to get busier and you wanted to know where you fit in with all of that before you allow yourself to fall in deeper. 
Hugh brings a hand to rub your back, placing a gentle kiss at the crown of your head. “I don’t believe ya,” he says. “Let me grab your things and we can head inside and talk?” 
You nod and release your hold on him, watching him walk towards your trunk to grab your duffle bag filled with clothes and toiletries to last for the rest of the weekend. Once he shuts your trunk, Hugh reaches out and takes your hand in his, leading you inside his home and up the stairs to his bedroom. 
You’ve been thinking so much since the last time you were here, trying your best to stay in the moment and not expect too much, but when Hugh mentioned his schedule for the next few months, you started to pull away. You didn’t want to put your all into this if it wasn’t going to go anywhere. Hugh sits at the edge of his bed and looks up at you, head tilting to the side. 
You’re pacing back and forth in front of him and he reaches out for your hand to pull you to stand between his legs. 
“Hey,” he says softly. 
You don’t look at him, letting out a quiet sigh.
“Baby,” Hugh says again. “Look at me.”
You clear your throat and turn your attention to him. There are tears stinging your eyes and you aren’t even sure why you’re getting so emotional, but there is a bit of fear knowing that this may be the last weekend you would spend with him. 
“Talk to me. I can’t help if I don’t know what’s goin’ on in your mind.” 
“You’re going to be busier,” you point out, biting the inside of your cheek. “And I don’t want to hold you back. I know we literally just met two weeks ago, but I’m okay with ending things the way they are now. It’s been more than amazing to spend all this time with you and–”
“Ending this?” Hugh interrupts, confusion written all over his face as his brows furrow together. “Do you not want this?” 
“No, I do!” you sigh, looking down at your hands that are currently holding onto his. “I just– I don’t want you to have to worry about me while you’re away shooting and you’re going to just be so busy. I know what you do for a living and it’s to be expected, but I just feel like you’d worry while you’re away and I don’t–” you let out a shaky breath and shake your head. “Am I even making sense?” 
Hugh sighs. “You are making sense,” he reassures, bringing your hand to his lips and placing a soft kiss on the back of it. “But I guess I just don’t understand. You won’t be holding me back.”
“Hugh,” you close your eyes for a moment and release his hands to wrap your arms around his shoulders. “I like you a lot and it scares me,” you admit. “It scares me because I don’t know how I fit into all of this. Into your life.”
“Really?” Hugh asks. “Because I can see it so clearly.” 
“What?”
“I can see how you fit into my life so clearly,” Hugh repeats. “And you’re not tied to a job here. You travel for work too and I may or may have not talked about you to Ryan and Shawn…” he admits quietly. “Anyway, I know it’s scary because this scares me too, but I can’t…” he shakes his head, looking up at you as his hands move to rest on your hips. “I can’t even fathom letting you go and I don’t want to either.”
“I’ve given my all before in a relationship and in the end, it only hurt me…” you reply with a shaky voice. 
“I know,” he sighs, eyes softening as he slowly stands up. Your hands drop from his shoulders to his waist as Hugh’s hands cup the base of your neck, keeping his eyes solely focused on yours. “And I can’t promise that everything will always be okay, but I can promise you that I’d always put you first. No matter what. Whatever this is between us,” Hugh continues, his thumbs brushing against the corners of your eyes as he feels a couple of tears trickle. “I want to believe that it’ll work out.” 
“We’ve only known each other for two weeks,” you whisper. “I’m way in over my head. You must think I’m crazy.” 
“Like I said… You have a lot of love to give,” Hugh whispers, gently pecking your lips. “And I’d be a lucky man to be on the receiving end of your love one day.” 
You bite your lower lip and wrap your arms around him tighter, moving to rest your forehead against the crook of his neck as his hands drop from the base of your neck to rest on your lower back. Hugh can feel the weight lift itself off your shoulders as you relax into him. He peppers kisses along your cheek and tightens his hold on you. 
“Feeling better?” Hugh whispers into your ear.
You nod against him. “Yeah, thank you, Hugh.”
“All I ask is that you talk to me, baby, okay?” He asks, pulling back to look down at you. “Whatever is bothering you, I don’t want you to hold it in. I’m here to listen.” 
“God, you really are perfect, aren’t you?” you laugh quietly, pecking his lips. 
Hugh smiles to himself. He realizes that he hates seeing you upset and when he hears your laugh and sees the smile on your face, he feels proud, accomplished. “I’m not perfect.” 
“I’d say otherwise,” you smile, looking deeply into his eyes. “I’m not used to talking about what’s bothering me or my feelings, but I’m learning.”
“This will always be a safe space, okay?” Hugh tells you. “You’re safe with me.”
You hug him tightly, burying your face into him as you let out a sigh of relief. You feel his arms tighten around you and it brings you so much comfort. Being here with him, in his arms, brings you comfort. You feel him fall back onto his mattress, taking you with him as you curl against his side, arm draped over his abdomen as his arm hooks around your shoulders. 
“So, you told Ryan and Shawn about me?” you ask, looking up at him. “As in the Ryan Reynolds and the Shawn Levy?” 
Hugh laughs. “Do you describe all people like that?”
“Only celebrities,” you correct. 
Hugh looks down at you and shakes his head, a smile lining his lips. “I did, is that okay? I know we never talked about who can know and who can’t…”
“It’s okay, Hugh,” you reassure him, kissing his chest. 
“I’d tell the whole world, if I could,” he says honestly. “But whenever you’re ready, baby.” 
You nod, shutting your eyes as you rest against him. “Thank you,” you whisper. “For not pressuring me. For going at my pace. I know it must not be easy, but you have no idea how much it means to me.” 
Hugh hooks a finger under your chin, eyes scanning your features as he bites his lower lip. Your eyes remain closed as he brushes his thumb lightly along your jawline. “I’d wait for you, no matter how long it takes.”
“Yeah,” you smile, turning your head to kiss the pad of his thumb. “You’re perfect.”
Hugh laughs to himself and then holds you tighter into his side. “So, I also told Ryan and Shawn you were a photographer and they may want to meet you to discuss a few things.”
“About my work or about us?” you open your eyes at that, looking up at him.
“About your work.”
“But I’m an engagement photographer, and last I checked, they’re both already married.” 
Hugh smiles. “Well, I also showed them your other work…”
“Oh, but those weren’t really serious… They were just for fun. Landscapes, street photography.” 
“They were just as good, baby.” He tells you. “And it’s possible,” he grins. “Or rather, they will be asking if you’d be interested in being our on-set photographer, taking pictures behind the scenes.”
Your eyes widen slightly, looking into his eyes. “That would mean I’d be there with you.”
Hugh nods slowly, the grin remaining on his lips. “Exactly, you’d be there with me on set of Deadpool & Wolverine. You sure you won’t get tired of me?” Hugh asks.
You shake your head and move to straddle his waist, resting your forearms down on either side of his head on the bed as you feel his hands move to your hips. 
“Isn’t that a question that I ask?” you tease, nose brushing against his. 
“It’s a valid question.” 
“No, I won’t get tired of you, Hugh. How can I?” you whisper, brushing your lips across his own lightly. “I mean, I think you’ve ruined other men for me.” 
Hugh growls and wraps an arm around your waist, rolling you over onto your back as he settles himself between your legs. “Good,” he says huskily, rolling his hips against yours. “Because you’re mine now.”
---
taglist (if links don't work, i'm sorry!): @corvusmorte - @dragonqueen89 - @whimsiwitchy - @kellyxo1 - @wolviehugh - @moonxknightx - @sullyselena - @angelofthorr - @spectorrrhgf - @needz1nk - @fandomxo00 - @godlypresley - @kythefangirl25 - @callsignyourmom
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enhaheeseung · 9 months ago
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BREAK UP - L. HEESEUNG
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Pairing: heeseung X fem reader
Warnings: crying, break up, angst, cursing, heartbreak, arguments.
Word count: 2,072k
Note: I'm just writing a few drabbles for now, hoping to get my engagement up a bit. This is really rushed, so it’s not good, but oh well.
Part 2 Part 3
-
“Babe, when are you coming to bed?”
It’s twelve am, and you have been waiting hours past your bedtime so you can finally go to sleep with your boyfriend for the first time in literal months.
It’s been a while since he started working from home, and you thought that would free up some space for you both to spend time together.
You thought you guys could go back to normal like how you used to be but now it seemed like he worked even more after being able to work from home on top of his promotion.
You received no answer, and you sighed. This had been going on for months, him ignoring you and solely focusing on work. You disappointedly slipped under the covers so you could patiently wait for him to be finished.
Staring at the clock, you counted down every minute until a full thirty minutes passed.
You decided to give it another go thinking half hour may have been enough time for him to conclude his work. “Honey, it’s so late,” your voice is groggy, eyes half opened, and you’re still worried about your boyfriend’s well-being. How could you not be when he barely ate and barely slept anymore? The last time you two spent quality time together was so long ago you couldn’t even remember. “Please come to bed. I know you’re tired.”
He snaps at your words, only increasing the annoyance that he currently feels. “Can you just stop talking, damn?!” He agitatedly shouts out of nowhere, turning his head in your direction with an angry expression plastered on his tired features.
Startled by the sudden loudness of his tone you jumped a little bit not used to him speaking to you that way. “S-sorry I was just worried” you tucked back under the covers your heart aching in your chest cause of what he said to you.
He was always on edge lately, but you never received that type of treatment from him. Ever even in your five years of dating, he has always been respectful to you.
“You’re sorry?” he scoffs. “You should be sorry I’m the one working hard every day to provide for you and all the frivolous bullshit you buy, and this is the thanks I get. Do me a favor and stop fucking bothering me while I’m working,” he rubs his temples, turning his attention back to his computer.
It most certainly wasn’t the first time he’d said such harsh words to you after your constant nagging for him to eat and sleep more, but this was the first time you felt pure anger from him, and it worried you cause he was never this bad before and you feared that as time went on like this it would just get worse.
“O-okay.” You looked at his stressed back, noticing how tense his shoulders were, and you felt bad knowing he was taking on all of the work to provide for you both. Apparently, all you were doing was bothering him, but you weren’t doing it intentionally. “I guess it’s a crime to care about my boyfriend.” Your voice broke a little, and you turned your back to him, calling it quits for the night. He could come to bed whenever he wanted.
“You know what?” He shuts the computer and sighs. “I think.” he pauses for a moment, the silence getting the best of your nerves cause you were scared about what he was going to say. “We should just break up.”
His words dangle in the air for minutes, and within those minutes, you feel tears pricking your eyes and your heart breaking into little tiny bits. “Hee-“ you sat up now, looking at him with your bloodshot eyes.
“I know you’re going to run down every reason why we shouldn’t, but I’m done. I’m tired of this, and I’m tired of talking. I can’t do it anymore, and nothing you say can ever change my mind.”
You’re left absolutely speechless too stunned to even say anything not to say he would want to hear it or listen now anyway.
You’ve spent so many long years of your life with him that you couldn’t see yourself being with anyone else besides him you thought that he was your happy ever after and to hear him say he wants to break up felt like a dream a very bad dream never in your life did you ever think he’d say the words but he did and it came out so easily like he’s been wanting to say it but only now decided to.
And the thought made you upset because if he’s been feeling this way for this long why did he even bother to string you along knowing he didn’t see a future with you anymore after your guys relationship went downhill?
In the midst of your thoughts his voice brings you back to the present. “I’ll call your mom in the morning so you can get all your stuff and be out by tomorrow.” You don’t respond, and the only thing you hear for the next few hours is typing on a keyboard.
You would go to the sofa, but you’re literally glued to the bed, paralyzed by grief.
The tears wouldn’t stop flowing, and they definitely didn’t stop once he came to bed. If anything, they got worse when you felt his warmth so close to you but yet so far away.
He tried slipping his hand around your waist, but you slapped it away. “Don’t touch me,” you say through your heartbroken cries.
He immediately retracted his hand, a little surprised at first by how quickly you rejected his touch.
He didn’t care really he just thought it might comfort you a little so you could sleep since you’ve been up crying for literally hours but it didn’t matter one way or the other to him as he turned on his side and shut his lamp off.
Heeseung slept soundly while you lay awake, crying every last tear you had left in you.
-
When morning struck, heeseungs alarm woke him up. His eyes shot open, and he quickly grabbed his phone, turning the awful sound off.
He turned towards your side of the bed and patted the soft material in search of your warmth, but he found none.
His eyes opened, and he was met with a few luggage bags that looked to be packed already. He sat up confused for a moment until memories of last night flooded his mind.
He heard a rustle coming from the closet, and you appeared a second later, already fully dressed this early in the morning. Usually, you would still be asleep when he started work.
But obviously, today was different.
His eyes shifted throughout the room. Most of your stuff was already gone.
As you walked to each end of the room collecting your stuff, his eyes followed you, watching your every movement.
The moment he saw you grabbing all your ornaments, he felt an ache in his chest.
You didn’t have much in the bedroom, but those little ornaments had you written all over them, and it was one of the few things that made it obvious to him that he wasn’t living alone, and seeing them all getting wiped out made him feel sick to his stomach. “Y/n?” He mumbled out while nervously picking at his nails.
You didn’t answer. Of course, you didn’t. He said he was done talking, and so were you. Last night, you came to terms with this. It took hours, but you just accepted it.
You had to.
Were you going to miss him?
Yes.
Was it going to hurt?
Yes.
But you didn’t want to be in his life if he didn’t want you to be in his.
You continued to pick up the little porcelain cat decorations, and that’s when he decided to slip out from under the covers and walk over to you, standing behind you and taking the figurine from your hand, setting it back down where it had been sitting for the last couple of years. “I’m sorry,” he whispered in your ear while back hugging you, the warmth of his bare chest sending electricity throughout your body. “About last night, sweetheart, I was just tired and said a lot of things I didn’t mean, and I know that it sounds like a shitty excuse, but I really didn’t mean it, baby. I’ve just been so stressed lately, and I hate myself for taking it out on you. I’m so sorry I made you cry.” he closed his eyes, inhaling your scent, the one he’d been missing for months.
You hated yourself for the way you melted into his arms after all the things he said to you last night, but it’s just been so long since you felt his touch on you that you couldn’t help it.
You leaned into him, his body pressing flush against yours. It felt so good being in his strong arms again.
But as fast as you melted, you hardened up even quicker, slipping out of his grasp.
You started packing up your things again, keeping a good distance from him because right now you know you could easily forgive him, but you didn’t want to because there’s no way he could say what he said to you last night and change up so quickly in the morning you weren’t falling for it.
When you walked by him, he quickly extended his hand, grabbing you by your elbow, pulling you into his chest, and hugging you closely. “Little one, please forgive me.” he rested his chin atop your head, stroking your back softly. “I need you. Love, without you, I don’t have anything, you know that. Remember, I’ve told you so many times everything I do is all for you. I know I made a mistake, but I’m sorry. Please forgive me, please?” His voice shook slightly, and you could feel just how fast his heart was beating against your chest and the words were on the tip of your tongue, but for the way you feel right now, you think breaking up would just be for the best.
You two were living different lives, and the compatibility wasn’t aligned anymore. As much as you hated living a life without him, the thought of living a life where he was working and you were being neglected was something you hated even more.
Your breath got caught in your throat the moment his lips pressed against your neck. “Please,” he begged in between each soft kiss he left on your neck. “Say something, please,” he sniffles softly and rests his palms over your stomach.
You peeled his hand off your body, turning around to tell him that you were done straight to his face, but it was so hard cause he looked absolutely distraught. “Heeseung, I’m leaving, and that’s final.”
The sob he let out almost made you break down in tears yourself. He tried to cover it by cupping his mouth, but it was too late. It was one of the most heartbreaking things you’ve ever heard from him, and you had to leave now before you ended up forgiving him.
You quickly grabbed your things, wheeling them to the front door with him close behind you. “I can’t let you go, y/n. I-I love you.” his arms were secured around you again, and you stood there, trying to remain as emotionless as possible until he finally let go of you. “So that’s just it? What am I supposed to do without you, baby?” He asked warm tears running down his cheeks he looked so sad and vulnerable.
“You said you were tired of talking, and at this point, so am I. Goodbye, heeseung. I hope work treats you better than I ever could.” You unlocked the front door and opened it.
“Y/n-“
“Enough!” You shouted at him, losing your patience finally and letting all your months of pent-up anger get the best of you.
He stood there completely stunned by you raising your voice at him, and it left him speechless.
Even though his mouth was parted like he wanted to say something, the words just never made their way out.
The last thing you saw before slamming the door was his sad, tearful expression, but this was what he asked for, and he got it.
-
Thanks for reading likes comments and reblogs are always appreciated sorry for any typos or errors I hope you all have a good day/night♥️
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theonlyhonoredone · 4 months ago
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Sukuna BF Headcanons
Pairing: Ryomen Sukuna x Reader
Warnings: none
Summary: my ideas about how Sukuna would be as a partner
Masterlist
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bf!Sukuna does not realize he’s falling for you until he is already in love with you. It’s not entirely a falls second and harder situation, but he certainly realizes it later than you. Something would trigger it for him, either you going on vacation or a date or something that forced him to face the idea of his life without you. Once he realized how much he hated that idea he realized that he was absolutely in love with you.
bf!Sukuna who would do anything to get with you. He’ll make it know to you the second he realizes his feelings that he wants you to be his and no one else's ever. He’s an intense guy and he’s overwhelming with his confession. It sounds more like a proposal but he’s only asking you to be his girlfriend. Luckily your used to his intensity at that point and you agree, but tell him he has to take you on an actual date before you become official.
bf!Sukuna is going to panic at first but once you’re together it all just clicks. You’re a natural fit and he quickly becomes more affectionate and soft with you. He has no shame about acting this way in public too, he wants everyone on earth to you know that you belong to each other and they should all just leave you alone.
bf!Sukuna loves when other people see you holding hands or kissing or anything else, he thinks everyone is jealous of his perfect girlfriend and finds joy in thinking about them crying to themselves over the fact that they can’t have you. If he tells you this you just tell him he’s ridiculous and that no one is thinking of stealing his girlfriend because everyone is terrified of him. He’ll laugh in response and tell you that’s for good reason.
bf!Sukuna is a scary man, and you know that he's quick to anger and has no qualms about turning things physical. You’ve seen him get into numerous fights, but still, you just can’t imagine finding him scary. He can be snarky and mean sure, but he’s always so soft with you that you’d sooner compare him to a kitten than a monster. He’s careful to never raise his voice with you, even in the most heated arguments. He knows that he’s a scary man, it’s something he takes pride in, but he doesn’t want you to see him that way. You’re the only person he views as his equal, so he makes sure that he treats you as such.
bf!Sukuna doesn’t get to the point of explosive anger with you, but he’s certainly still dramatic. He’s not the best at regulating his emotions so sometimes he simply storms out of the room. It scared you the first time but he called you an hour later from the gym and apologized. He’d been getting worked up and he needed some alone time. It was one of the first times he’d really gotten vulnerable with you, confessing that he was worried about saying something nasty to you or scaring you with his anger. After a long talk you asked him to just tell you when he needed a break or time alone and you’d happily give it to him. He does his best but sometimes he still storms out and part of you thinks he just likes making a dramatic exit.
bf!Sukuna can be overbearing at times, and controlling. It comes more so from a selfish desire to have everything his way than an actual desire to control you. Once you told him you felt like he was trying to control you he was quick to back off because he really does want to be the best partner possible. He feels that’s what you deserve and he wants to be the one to give you everything you deserve.
bf!Sukuna is willing to work on his issues in context of you and your relationship, so you can both be happy together. However, if anyone else were to complain about his behavior he’d likely respond with a few cutting words and possibly a slap.
bf!Sukuna looks up to you in a lot of ways. You’re much calmer than him and kind to everyone you meet. He thinks you bring a good balance to each other because you can be overly kind to the point of being a pushover and he can be, well, just an asshole.
bf!Sukuna is very protective of you, because he thinks you're too kind and too good for the world and anyone who hurts you should pay ten fold. Surprisingly though, you're just as protective over him. He’s a perfectionist to a fault and you often have to drag him away from a task and force him to relax. You’re the only one who knows about his secretive soft side so you protect that part of him with your life, making sure he always knows he’s loved and appreciated and that he doesn’t have to be perfect at everything.
bf!Sukuna who expects perfection from himself but is the biggest hype man in the world when it comes to you. Anything you want to try he’ll encourage and tell you you’re great at it no matter what. He adores watching you try new things too, he thinks you look cute when you concentrate and the joy on your face once you finally accomplish whatever task you’re working at is the most heartwarming sight he can imagine. 
bf!Sukuna thinks you and everything you do are perfect. If you decide to paint something he’s declaring it greater than the Mona Lisa and hanging it on his wall immediately. You bake cookies and he’s telling you you should open a bakery because they’re so good people will pay millions for them. When he taught you how to drive stick shift and you kept failing to change gears he insisted there must be something wrong with his car and that he’d have to fix it so you could try again. You lost a game of pool? Doesn’t matter, you’re a beginner and he swears he’s never seen anyone do as good as you when they’re starting off. He’ll swear on his life he was way worse than you when he started and that you'll be better than him in no time.
bf!Sukuna who's always encouraging, even when you're facing an abject failure. You’ve learned that’s just one of the ways he shows his love. He’s not the type of man to sit down and pour his heart out to you, but he makes sure you know he’ll always be there to support you, no matter what. He sometimes tries to express himself more verbally, and though it often comes out sounding more like a command, you appreciate it nevertheless. 
bf!Sukuna is very physical, almost always having his arm around your shoulders or his hand on your back. He is always the driver and keeps his hand planted firmly on your thigh wherever you go. At night he’s cradling you against his large body, wrapping you up tight in his arms, and burying his face in your hair. He’s pulling you into his lap at parties, always trying to sneak into the shower with you, hugging you from behind anytime he can. The man can’t keep his hands to himself. One of his favorite things to do is wait until you’re all cozied up watching a movie and then start to tickle you. He likes the way you whine and tell him to stop because you’re trying to watch the movie. You try to push him off which always leads to the two of you getting into a wrestling match which he sometimes lets you win. 
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annwrites · 6 months ago
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⸻ billy hargrove being in love with you would include:
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at first, he'd be unbelievably irritated over it.
and he most certainly would not initially admit that what he feels is love.
no, it's just a stupid fucking crush.
you just happen to get his dick hard—that's it.
but why, then, can't he get you out of his fucking head—off his mind?
like, why does he want to hold your hand, & cuddle you, & say sweet shit to you?
admitting it is not something he would ever do up-front.
instead, he'd, quite honestly, prob be a bit mean to you over it. somehow feeling like it's your damn fault.
but, when he sees how his words hurt you, he fills with guilt & does what he can do undo it/dial it back.
so, he offers to start giving you rides to & from school.
maybe even makes invitations to hang out—just not at his house. he doesn't want his dad ruining whatever the fuck he has, or, at the very least, wants to have with you.
so, you guys go to the starcourt mall, or the movies, or hawkins video to rent something to take back to your place to watch, or to the hawkins arcade, etc.
he just needs an excuse to spend extra time with you that isn't strictly in a classroom.
and he buys you things: pays for your movie ticket & snacks, pays for the movie you rent for the night, buys you gifts from the mall, etc.
and by insisting it's not a big deal—kind of like a self-fulfilling prophecy—he makes it one by stressing how much it really doesn't matter. it's just a few bucks.
in time, he offers to teach you how to drive his car.
just likes that he'll get credit for being the one to teach you how to drive in-general.
the more time you spend together, the more intimate he gets.
he's been flirtatious & handsy the whole time, but being 'sweet on you' is different.
it includes soft, nervous touches on his part with shaking, uncertain hands, waiting for you to mock him for it.
when you don't, he starts paying you nice compliments, like how he likes what you're wearing, or that your hair is really cute today.
starts holding your hand in public & around school, too.
speaking of intimate, he's usually rough when it comes to sex, to keep up that masculine façade, until he shyly asks you if you want to try ❝y'know, makin' love, or whatever the fuck❞.
and everything is slow and sweet and gentle & he lies in your arms afterward with his head resting between your breasts and he just feels so safe & loved & wanted & cared for.
is 100% the jealous type, so don't even think about hanging out with other guys. he needs that security in knowing you won't abandon him, too.
he, in time, tells you—begrudgingly—about his childhood & his mom. he tries to brush it off, but really wants you to give a shit. and when you do—hold him & tell him how sorry you are—he knows that he's fallen entirely.
it scares the shit out of him, though. because he's not like other guys: hearts & chocolates (he's capable of being a sweetheart, but because he hates himself so much, he can't see it). he's terrified of becoming his dad. what if he's not the best thing for you? what if he hurts you? the list is endless.
but when he thinks of being alone again? of losing you? he can't let that happen.
so, he says it. those three words. and he feels like he might vomit when he does.
and then you say it back and he cries.
once the two of you graduate, he works his ass off to get you a nice home or apartment.
he wants to leave hawkins as whole & take the two of you out west.
and you get there.
and he returns to surfing & teaches you as well.
he loves sharing it with you.
and once the two of you are comfortable & settled, he pops the question.
he's a trembling, breathless mess while doing it, but he gets through it.
and once you've had some time to enjoy married life, it inevitably happens (he gets you knocked up)!
he promptly freaks out.
then spends all his free time working on a nursery.
snaps at you when you try and help put anything together.
❝you need to be in bed with your feet up, or something. just let me take care of it, alright?❞
he just wants you to be pampered, in truth.
but once your little one has entered the world?
dad mode all the way.
he's always holding it, helping change diapers (even if he bitches about them sometimes), changing its clothes, playing with it (loves this part—always a huge smile on his face, especially when the baby is smiling, too).
he becomes everything his dad never was: a good man. and he has the love of a good woman that he knows is his forever.
until death do you part.
975 notes · View notes
cryptfile · 7 months ago
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᪇ꫭ dreamseeker, [ qimir x jedi!reader ]
summary — it all started when you find out he’s alive.
warnings — pure angst, violence, blood, mentions of injuries and tons of tension, sfw.
side notes — 4k+ // English's not my first language so please be kind! went slightly away with this one so would catalogue it as an alternative universe. Heard liking without reblogging makes you fall in an awful curse that breaks my heart in the process so let that sink in, anyway everything it's appreciated!,,, thought about making an +18 second part? dunno,,, thks also for the 110 followers! love you guys sooooo much *heart avalanche*
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The air's hot in the room when you woke up.
The sweat made the sheets stick to you body as you got out of bed for the third time that week, a terrible headache forming as you leave the dormitories in the middle of the dark. Coruscant suddenly feels unbearable. You've slept almost nothing through the course of the week, so you surely are in a bad mood when the cold wind of the night makes you shiver at the sudden change of temperature.
I'm searching for you. Even in my dreams.
The words are repeating in the back of you head, scratching a part of your brain while you keep on trying to remember who's voice you're dreaming so much lately.
It's all connected somehow, always is. You've learned to trust the force a while ago, learned that destiny's intertwined with an energy field that holds the galaxy together the hard way, so you know, deep down, that you have to trust your guts in this one, something that you know it concerns you but can't quite understand what really is in the first place.
Dreams. Dreams are a cruel thing that you tend to forgot sometimes, the reflection of the mind and soul projected like a high-class transmission in your head. Dreams talk, and they make you think about things you've let in the past, things you've certainly need to come back at some point.
That's why you can't sleep later, cause you know it means something. You know that dreaming the very same dream every single night for the past week means something more than just mere imagination playing around, far from an innocent scenario.
The temple is silent at night even when the city outside seems to be so wake in contrast of the inside, most of the lights out as you crossed the empty hallway hoping to avoid anyone, cause you know they'll ask questions you don't have an answer for.
In all truth, you don't have a clue why are you up so late, why this deep voice kept you awake when you should be deep in your sleep, dreaming about something more than superstitions. You don't have an answer to any superior, don't seem to have an answer for yourself either.
The Jedi trials ended long ago, yet, you don't think of yourself as someone as successful as Yord Fandar, your talent being far from what it should be expected. You never complain about anything and never would, they were the only family you ever knew and you refuse to lose everything you've been working so hard for just for questioning your bare existence.
"Can't sleep?" The male voice makes you stiff almost immediately, checking your surroundings to notice Master Sol approaching you from the left. The Jedi Master catches you by surprise, your hands already on the lightsaber that is hanging on your waist before you notice you're safe, even when you don't want to talk. "I'm sorry. Didn't mean to scare you."
There are things that are worth hiding, but with Sol? Master Sol seems to see through it all, the worries and the dreams that you don't know if you should call nightmares, even when you try to lock them away for a minute. That's the main reason the man stares at you, cause you expel that smell of desperation, the tension in your muscles as you don't sleep in what seems are ages.
"What's troubling you?" He asks, your own eyes betraying you as they can't hold the weight of his gaze. "I know it's not my place to ask, but are you sleeping well lately?"
"Not really, but nothing to worry about" you say almost afraid that it's going to get you in trouble, the lack of sleep making you think the most stupid things as you stop in the middle of the hallway, making sure there's no one around more than Master Sol and yourself.
Not sleeping is a dangerous thing when reality tends to become a feverish version of itself.
I'm searching for you. Even in my dreams.
You're unsure of telling him what's really going on, unsure of trusting the people you've been close your whole life out of nowhere. A sudden sixth sense that commands you to keep the dreams to yourself, the sound of the male voice you've been listening like the most important secret you've ever hold account of.
It's almost embarrassing to admit you don't trust a Jedi above your rank, that your sixth sense all of sudden makes you keep the truth when it can be something important, when Master Sol has been like a friend to you after all those years of training.
Things have been weird since your Jedi Master was found recently murdered in Ueda, a heavy weight in your shoulders as it saddened you more than you even expected. Master Indara was like close family, and you find yourself missing her, mostly in moments like that when you wish you have someone to talk to
“I was going to the dormitories” Sol explains soon after, walking by your side. “I needed to ask you for a favor my dear friend, and I’m afraid I cannot wait much longer for you to heal.”
Heal. Are you ever allowed to heal? It’s been less than a couple of days since you found out about Indara, let alone the dreams that were tormenting you the rest of the week and suffer the loss, so it seems funny when Master Sol tells you he cannot wait much longer: No Jedi ever has time to heal.
“What can I do to help?”
It’s all it takes to leave Coruscant after, trapped in space in a small ship with not only Master Sol, but Yord and Sol’s younger padawan Jecki Lon, strange enough, also with Verosha Aniseya, a former Jedi you keep an eye on through time passed.
Suddenly you’re traveling through the galaxy and there’s no time for any more tears. Suddenly you need to toughen up and act like this Jedi Knight you’re supposed to be, even when you keep questioning yourself more than ever.
Maybe it’s because of Indara’s death. Her decease came so out of nowhere it shocked you to the very heart — It’s clear that you’re sensitive, dreaming stuff you’ve been getting tired of deciphering, pure nonsense, but then, the ship lands in Khofar and Sol it’s convincing you to stay inside even you’re perfectly capable of taking Verosha’s twin and his alleged master.
It’s your own mind that plays tricks on you, making you believe you’re not good enough to help. Truth is you felt your training as a padawan was not enough, you’re an easy target now that you’re hurt and it seems to make sense when all of sudden the group of Jedis leave you to fucking rot between white walls and buttons that sparkled.
It’s clear you’re affected. How can you not be affected by it? You’re overcome by sadness and anger both mixed together, and that feeling by itself is a dangerous one when in history, makes people question things too much to the point of no return.
So when you find yourself close to the light of the hologram that you turned on being so bored in the ship, your fingers dim between the white and blue rays as you wondered: Is it honorable to seek for revenge? Is it true to a Jedi to feel this gut-wrecking wrath?
You know the answer deep inside. You know it’s wrong, yet your feet think otherwise, cause when you leave the ship in the middle of the night you still debate yourself if you should disobey, if you should do what you want instead, walking through the woods like you know which way to go.
You never disobey any command, so it’s a new thing to openly doubt about the judgement of your superiors, to walk in an unknown planet despite the orders you were told. The path seems to light by itself as you can sense it in the air, the force conducting you in silence as you walked in a fast pace. You know deep down, know everything went wrong.
The blue light of your sable is enough to light the way, the humidity in the air makes you sweat as concentrated in the sounds of the nature, you run, run until your lungs are burning and your heartbeats are so fast you’re afraid the organ itself is going to jump out of your chest. You run even when the long leaves of the plants hit you in the face, when your legs are getting cramps and you can feel the lack of oxygen: The pain is not enough to stop you.
You can hear it from far away, the heat of the fight. The sounds of the physical effort, the buzzing of the lightsables against the silent night. Adrenaline creeps across your blood flow, and even when you can't breathe properly at all you run to the chaos, driven like a moth to the flame. You let the force conduct you as you close your eyes, jumping and elevating from the floor enough to hold the sable from over your head — You attack.
I'm searching for you. Even in my dreams.
It’s coming again, the rough sound of your dreams when your blue sable hits the red out of nowhere, force colliding against each other as the impact is enough to send you directly to the floor. You know who the enemy is, the surprise in Jecki’s face and the disapproval moments after
The stranger is fast and he doesn’t hesitate when he strikes, it’s fast enough to hurt in a mortal way and you became aware of it when Jecki’s falling to the ground and the acid in your mouth is enough to make you look away — The anger comes moments after, the red stains blurring your vision as you let out a scream, gathering the force to dodge his deadly attack.
It’s for Indara, the young padawan, and the Jedi’s he just slayed like they were nothing: It stings in your soul yet you stop holding back, stop holding yourself to finally hit harder, to strike faster than he does, to hurt the stranger as much as he hurted you. And he responds, but not fast enough to beat you, cause you let the metallic back of your sable hit his head when he’s kneeled on the floor, and you smile to yourself cause you have no damn mercy when his helmet finally cracks and it’s enough to break apart revealing his face.
It’s all it takes then. All it takes to froze you in that very spot, holding the sable over your head, ready to end his life with no second thought.
You know that face. You know it when suddenly he’s smiling at you.
I'm searching for you. Even in my dreams.
It makes sense soon after, lowering the sable to the floor without fully believing it, a ghost in front of you as you feel the air leaving your lungs. Drinking the sight of him like he’s not real, like it’s a sick joke your mind made to break you down, to make you weaker.
You’re pulled by a sudden force, by the force. However, falling to the floor hurts way less than seeing him again, the words stuck in your throat unable to speak. It’s imminent, it’s devastating when the pain catches you by surprise, your back aching against the rough surface.
He’s going to kill you, isn’t he?
It makes sense to die by his hand. The memories you two share, the intimacy that was taken away so sudden, it only makes sense to die by the one you loved before, even if it's a surprise you'll never recover from.
The heat of his red lightsaber against your neck is not enough to scare you, but enough to finally look at his face, to encounter his eyes and reveal the truth that was hidden all along between lies. You experience the intensity of his gaze, how it softens when realizing you're looking at him with that same look you have been doing it years ago.
"You're alive" it slips away from you before even noticing, the sound of your voice wrapping him in a haze he didn't expect at first, to be so devastated by you even after all the time resenting the Jedi's and everything they represented "Qimir you're alive..."
He knows you're shocked, the sound of your voice piercing in his ears as he threatened with the weapon against your neck, any sudden movement would slice you in the second — "Hello to you too."
He's real, when he speaks out loud you know he's real, he's standing in front you erasing all the theories you made about not sleeping enough now making you delusional, he's there, standing ready to kill and take what he wants to feel like he won.
It's a personal vendetta, you know it as you expect any answer, any word at all until Sol's screaming as he's taken away from you once again.
He's not a friend, he's not the Qimir you once knew, and he's not someone you can trust again as he was ready to kill. He's not was he used to be, and you can tell by the way he moves, the way he goes against Master Sol hoping to leave the Jedi in the floor, his anger when he refers to his acolyte as a traitor.
He's the one responsible for Indara's death indirectly. He's not a lover. He's not a friend.
You think he died years ago, never really understanding what really happened to the bright man you met in Coruscant, a secret no one dared to bring up. He has the same fucking smile you know too well, the one that make you crumble completely in the sight, and it sadden you, it saddens you he take that path when you seem to woke up from whatever has you nailed to the floor and finally run to help Sol.
You believe you're in the right side, you've been taught about the light and the dark, and you put your heart out filling your mouth saying how you're doing good, how you're making things right.
It's kill or get killed. It’s clear that Qimir does not seem to care about any connection you shared before, hurting you no longer means whatever it meant before, and as the sable burnt your tight, no one cares when you're fainting in the floor, abandoning the fight when it approaches his end.
Sol's mad, but it's not enough to make the master stop to check if you're alive. So many lives were lost in Khofar, and the fight was so demanding you're soon forgot in a planet when the sun is finally rising.
You know you've always been alone, know the last time you saw your family you were too young to even remember, so it's not a surprise when you're left behind. Jedi's come and go, that's why they keep training them generation after generation — It's expected to lose some percentage in missions.
What's not expected, it's when Qimir is close to your cold body later in the early morning. Still deep induced in the fever of pain when he's betrayed by his own heart, his old feelings resurfacing even when he made sure to bury them in a hole in the back of his head.
He's weak it seems. And he should be ashamed of himself when he's the one carrying you back to his ship when everyone has left you behind.
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I'm searching for you. Even in my dreams.
Is that his voice? The rough sound that makes you wake up in a uncomfortable place with clothing you don't remember owning.
You're confused for a second before realizing you're in unknown place, a cold breeze shivering your skin: You're in someone's house, using someone's bed.
It's all it takes to make you stand up, leaving the warm sheets behind as your eyes scan the place looking for both a person or a way out. There's a saucepan in the fire cooking slowly, and a smell you can't describe at first.
You move carefully, theories in your mind about what happened that seemed so imposible. You're sure you're far from Coruscant where you should be, yet, you don't feel much danger when you discover you're left alone in what it seems to be a cave, one that lets a windy current enter through a slit between the rocks.
You're unsupervised: Does that mean you're not a prisoner?
You remember fainting in the cold surface of Khofar, the humidity in the air as the air leaves your lungs before entering a state of unconsciousness. You remember Qimir as a ghost in front of you, smiling like he's young again, trying to get to your room in the middle of the night as if it wasn't forbidden.
Was that your dream about? A warning about the stranger being alive?
You don't dare to drink the water, you don't dare to touch any belonging more than the necessary when inspecting. Its more of a hiding than a home itself, so it lacks of belongings as you can't find anything else more than your clothes, protecting yourself from the cold air.
You're not treated as a prisoner, yet you don't feel any safe at all due to the recent events that seemed to say otherwise. You cannot seem to find your sable, and the silence it's making you lose patience.
The cave is a mess soon after, you're searching for your most important weapon, so now the lack of it seems to make you nervous. You search until you're no longer alone, a new presence in the cave as you adopt a pose of defense.
"Where's my sable?" you ask to what it seems the air, acting all tough before noticing who's the person that dragged you to a different planet, the responsable of healing your wounds with a unexpected speed. You know who it is from before, the change in the cave when he's around even when you don't receive any answer back "I'm talking to you, Qimir."
He doesn't talk when he's tossing it over the things he brought from outside, the orange details in the heavy metal shining against the dim lights of the cave. He knows you are not leaving without it, that you're too attached to it for your bad luck.
"Where am I?" you ask soon enough. At this point you lack of patience out of all, you're tired and your body is sore, you're still dreaming that very same thing, and you're not resting enough to keep your mind sane, so it's not a surprise when you're demanding answers, after all, you wanted to know what happened back in Khofar.
It hits you how much you miss him now that he is in front of you in full silence, not in the middle of violence like before, how much you wanted to hug him until he no longer breathes and spat something stupid as a not-very-funny joke. You miss him after all those years of believing he's death, that he disappeared out of sudden without telling nobody, not even you.
The silence makes you mad, and the stranger knows it, sense it in the force when the anger hits you, filling the air of the cave that feels small even when the spaces are big enough. He lied. That's all you can think of, he lied and never bothered to tell you he's alive after suffering his departing so whole heartedly.
Nights without sleeping as you let the insomnia carry you to a state you can't leave, overflowed by feeling you've learnt to deal with in the pass of time. Time heals it all they say, but it just makes things more bearable, help you live with it.
But now. Now it was cruel, it's a wound that opened by itself with the things you saw, the person he was now, embracing his dark side like it was something worth celebrating.
"Talk to me," you say, and you don't know why you're the one asking for answers when you shouldn't. "This is not fucking fair."
Fair.
"Nothing's ever fair," he says, and the sound of his voice is enough to make you shiver. Now that you're surrounded only by the crashing sound of the waves hitting the rocks outside, you can hear him without the buzz of the fight. "Your people know that very well. You make the rules after all. You decide what's fair in the galaxy."
It's a knife in your heart. You don't want him to affect you like he does, but it's impossible when it stings like a burnt from the sable, the weight of his words, the hatred on his tone when he spits the words like they're acid in his tongue.
"I've never made nothing" it's a declaration of self-hatred at it most, how you've not been capable of doing much even when you pride on being called a Jedi Knight. "You know that."
There's no response. You're used to follow orders, not question, trust you're working with the correct side, so his look is something new, something that leaves goosebumps on your skin.
"You're alive," you still don't believe it at first, now studying his factions like they were still craved in stone back on your head. "After all these years, you couldn't tell me you were alive?"
It's a bad joke, one that makes you laugh leaving a bittersweet taste in your mouth — "You couldn't tell your best friend you were leaving? Nobody talked about you all of sudden, you became a dream. Almost making me sure you never existed at all."
"That's what they told you? That I leaved?" the way he's telling the information makes you furrow your brows in response, trying to make sense of what he was saying: Was he implying they lied to you?
"Please, explain me then" you're not in the mood of fighting, instead, you want information, crucial information to what you were choosing to be "Enlighten me. Tell me why you left me there without saying goodbye. Why it doesn't seem to affect you as much as it affected me."
The stranger has grown cold. He has now adapted beneath this rough amour that separated him from what he was before. So he doesn't give you any answers even when you question him, looking at you without saying a word.
You've changed too. You're not the little padawan that followed Indara around and look up at Torbin, you're not afraid of showing your force anymore, after all those years he has told you you're more than capable of defeating any enemy, you are starting to believe it more that ever. Even when he's not around to see that change happen in front of his eyes.
He's not going to answer, he's not talking nor giving you what you needed.
"Am I prisoner?" you ask again, another question added to the pile.
"Does it look like you're being held?" he asks back, squatting close to the stove in the fire to the stir his soup. "No. You're not my prisoner."
You resist the urge to roll your eyes. He always was a man full of pride, but now it seemed he thrive in it, in sharing his knowledge he was sure it was so powerful he needed to take a pupil, some kind of dark padawan he wanted to train.
"I don't know you anymore Qimir," you state out loud, hoping to talk to him as a long-time friend, as the person he was in love all those years but never acted on it too afraid of the rules at first. "I don't know who you've become, and i've been mourning you like it's only yesterday you vanished from my life, yet you've been alive, plotting against your family."
"Family?" he asks, hurted by the words you choose. "I've never had a family. You know that very well, it was always me against them, against anyone who questioned their power, their use and knowledge of the force."
"So is that how we are going to act now? Like pride is enough to make you leave and act like we were never a thing? That I wouldn’t die for you without even question?" you seem disappointed as you speak — “Why you didn’t kill me back there when you had the chance?”
He's taken back by your words, the sincerity as you admit what it seemed impossible to say back then. It’s known by him the feelings he had for you were enough to stop the whole galaxy, but he never had the courage to say something about it, to go against the rules and let alone admit to you anything at all.
So to know that you care for him, even when you talked about it like it was in the past, is enough to make him short-circuit, to make his face change in a new look.
“You already know why I didn’t kill you” he says it so casually while cooking, that even when you stand in the middle of the room trying to think about anything, anything more that him and his powerful gravity that made you spin around him, drawn by his pulling force — “Doesn’t matter who you stand with, i’d never do anything to you.”
You let that sink in. You let him say it cause maybe, deep down, it’s what you need. Your eyes are full of tears but you don’t want to let any single tear roll from your eyes the second you feel the sadness, you don’t want to show any weakness whatsoever, anything that will make you look less than what you really are.
“I could ask you the same” he says soon after, looking at you from over his shoulder in a low voice that sends shivers down your spine “Why did you let me live back there?”
It’s a bruise in your ego, to your sense of defense — Walls up, not letting any feeling show at all. His question is left out in the space as you look at him through narrowed eyes, reminding yourself he’s the enemy.
He cannot have the satisfaction. He’s the one behind Verosha’s twin sister after all, the one who send her to seek her own revenge. You know you should kill him with no second though, to cease with the leak, destroy the rebel cause that was so dark and powerful, so dangerous, but as before, you can’t hurt him by any chance, too attached to the enemy to even think about using the force against him.
Qimir. You don’t expect him to be alive, to be so angry at his lies. You don’t expect him to be the threat to peace and tranquility you’ve been so warned about.
Fuck that. You can’t deal with him again.
Maybe you are a coward after all, not worthy of being called a Jedi Knight. Always too unsure, questioning if you’re doing things the right way.
It’s not your fight. It’s not your place to be, you’re not his prisoner so you reach your lightsaber quick enough to leave his side, holding the weapon against your bare hands as you leave the cave, facing the daylight and the ocean in front of you.
You're not his prisoner, so you quickly leave as soon as you can leave, unable to hold his gaze anymore, to answer a question you shouldn't be asked. Even if it's cold outside, the sun still shines and you are sure you're going to find a ship that will take you out of there, as far as possible — Maybe, even leave him there.
But when you walk, you're followed close by in silence. Not a prisoner, but not free enough to leave free whiningly.
Even when you pace fasten enough to try to leave him behind, it seems like it's not a physical effort to follow you near by, to follow the same footsteps you give in order to look for a way to get out.
What's his plan anyway? Follow you forever? He's going to get tired soon enough, the problem is you don't have the patience enough to wait for it, you can't wait for Qimir to be enlightened by mercy, to be rational, to let you leave so you can be as far away from him as possible.
So at any sudden sound, you happen to snap, to turn on the sable in one swift movement, quick enough to pull it against his neck, almost touching his skin, the blue light reflecting in his pupils as he seemed pleased by your attention.
That's what he wants in the end. Even if it's anger, he wants to get any reaction out for him.
"Stop following me around" it's a knot on your throat, a sting in the heart as you threat him, the sound of your voice almost mixing with the loud crashing of the ocean. "You said yourself, i'm no prisoner."
He can sense your anger yet he's devastated by what you've become, devastated by finally being in front of you. Even when you're hesitating to spare his life once again, he's driven by the smell he was so caught on before, the memories you brought, attacked by the lonely life he was forced to live, the perks he enjoyed embracing his dark side.
It seems like forever, an eternity while the energy just flows, while the tension consume you both.
You're caught in a spiderweb you cannot get out, cause when he opens his mouth to speak again, you don't expect to make your world tremble that way.
"I was searching for you."
You know what's coming next, the sound of his voice like a recorder playing over and over in your head, the vibrations of his tone matching the ones you've been dreaming about lately.
"I was searching for you. Even in my dreams."
It's enough to make you lower your sable.
To make the stranger smile.
my masterlist
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sombreset · 5 months ago
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I’m still not over Deadpool & Wolverine: WWIII. At all.
(Spoilers, also cw for blood and gore and just. Weird imagery)
There’s SO much stuff that happens in this comic, way more than I am posting here, that really digs deep into why Wade and Logan are so intertwined. They both suffered horribly. They’re both near immortal. They’ll both outlive everything they know. They both have rage that doesn’t ever seem to go away, they just have very different coping mechanisms.
This comic LITERALLY intertwines them, in more than one way.
First example is the one most people talk about, which is the whole thing where Logan cuts off a chunk of his own leg and cooks it for Wade so he has at least something to eat (is it gay to make the decision to cut off a piece of yourself and give it to another man so he has something to eat, even tho you both technically don’t need to eat, it just helps? Who knows)
Second example is the end of the comic, which I wish more people would talk about. While they’re fighting a big bad, Wade gets torn apart. Like… crushed. Into pieces. Past the point where Logan thinks regenerative healing can save him. And Logan is, despite all his complaining of how much he doesn’t like Wade, destroyed. Scared, and as the big bad points out— afraid.
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Logan then goes into an absolute blind rage. He’s in pain. He’s scared. He genuinely thinks he lost Wade, and he loses it.
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All the while, a small voice can be heard telling him to stop. Begging him to stop. He’s lost control. The antagonists of the comics wanted this, and while Logan is thrashing around they intentionally teleport him in front of a mother and child, fully expecting Wolverine to not tell the difference between friend or foe and kill them. Logan certainly cannot tell what he’s doing at this point. He can hardly see.
And then…
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Suddenly, Wade. Because some of Wade’s blood got into Logan, he literally grew OUT of him, just in time to stop him from murdering innocent people. Because Logan had fully lost control. Wade pleads with him to stop, and in the end he literally pulls out one of Logan’s bones and shoves it into his face to get him to actually snap out of it. Afterwards, they have a lot of really good conversation, but to avoid clogging this post more— tldr Wade calms Logan down, and tells him “Nobody can decide we’re monsters but us.” Which… I love.
Later on after the fight, there’s this funny panel (and a few before) where Wade’s like dude we are sharing your ass AND dick rn isn’t that crazy and then yeah he makes the comment about being “in” Logan which. Nice
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Anyways crazy b/c by the end of this comic, parts of Logan have literally been inside of Wade (chunk of Logan’s leg eaten by Wade) and ALL of Wade has been in Logan (he fucking grew out of him)
This comic is VERY good go read it if you haven’t
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spitdrunken · 19 days ago
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reinhard van astrea x isekai!reader
notes: obsessive behaviour/yandere, dependency @yandere-romanticaa - im the anon who sent in an ask! hope you like it <3
Domesticity is something Reinhard has never even had a taste of in his own life. His own family had fallen apart because of him all too quickly, and the little piece of happiness he can remember from his youngest days quickly became lost. After that, there had been little calm in his life, little except for training. His minimal needs taken care of by nameless servants who all looked upon him with awe, apprehension and outright fear.
Reinhard never quite managed to feel part of the human race since. He may be loved by the world, but its people would fear him. None of this ever stopped Reinhard from helping others and being the hero he is supposed to be. Though, at times, he wonders what his life might otherwise been like. In other words, like so many, he is subconsciously drawn to what he cannot have. When Reinhard falls someone, it’s most likely for someone living a relatively normal life. An unknown factor.
To Reinhard, it would be even better to meet someone who has no idea who that is. That is a tough thing to ask for, however. His face is known far and wide across Lugunica and his reputation as Sword Master stretches even beyond. It would be near impossible to meet someone whose perception of him wouldn’t be tainted by his ‘monstrous’ power.
Cue you. You have no idea what’s going on. One moment, you’d been going about your day, the next you’ve been transported into this unfamiliar and foreign world, to bustling streets full of species you don’t recognise and speaking a language you cannot understand. After crossing off ‘this is all just a dream’ from the list of possibilities, you’re faced with a frightening new reality.
You’re not taking this very well. It’s not long before you’re sitting somewhere on the cobbled ground, back against a wall and practically hyperventilating. Of course, you’re familiar with this kind of trope of fiction. You just can’t fathom how anyone could be excited about being ripped away from everything and anyone they’ve ever known. Nor have you ever fashioned yourself to be ‘main character’ material.
It’s Reinhard who finds you in a little alleyway, a little ways off from one of the main roads in Lugunica, mumbling to yourself and shaking. Most people would’ve passed by with little more than a glance, if they had even noticed you at all. That is simply the nature of large cities. But he is not the type of person to see someone in such clear distress and walk past without a second thought.
Reinhard approaches you without any hesitation. He tries to be as conspicuous as possible, adjusting his belt so his sword bumps against his side and putting down his feet a little harder than necessary, all to avoid scaring you. (Stealth is a passive Divine Protection of his. It takes him more effort to be noticed than not.) When you glance up, tear tracks clear on your cheeks and eyes wide with distress, Reinhard greets you with the most gentle smile he can muster. He kneels down in front of you, reaching out a hand with a handkerchief in it as if approaching a frightened animal. It’s a thick, soft cloth, embroidered with both his family’s colours and banner. “Please, take it,” he tells you. His smile falters a tad when, instead of breathing as fast as you were before, you seem to have stopped breathing whatsoever. But then you let out a stuttering, long exhale, shoulders slumping and mumble out a string of incomprehensible words. You wipe down your face and hide within the fabric. Out of respect, Reinhard gives you some time before prodding you with questions, looking away instead of staring. Though there are certainly things that grabbed his attention. Your way of dress, more than anything else. It’s not a type or style of clothing he recognises and, as a result, he can only assume that you’re a foreigner. Traveled here from further than the Four Great Nations, maybe. And gotten lost as a result. Reinhard doesn’t mind waiting for you to calm down. Though there might be trouble brewing somewhere else in the city, he’s certain that the rest of the guard can handle themselves for the time being. He’s not even on the job, after all. It’s important to stay in contact with the people he’s actually protecting, lest they become more of an idea or an image in his mind. He returns his focus to you once you’ve calmed down. “Do you want to talk about what happened?” This time, you look at him with no comprehension, then respond with something in your own tongue. Reinhard continues to try and communicate with you, all of the different languages he’s learned bits and pieces of out of politeness, yet none of it rings a bell for you. It’s difficult, frankly, and he’s running out of ideas. You seem to be growing closer to tears again by every second that passes. Perhaps it would be best to try and focus on something easier… A little distraction. He points at himself. “Reinhard van Astrea.” Any moment now, it must happen. There’ll be a flicker of recognition at his name, his appearance, the sword of his hip— And any hint of unguardedness will be erased and replaced by that look he is all too familiar with. That doesn’t happen. Instead, you smile. It’s wobbly and small, but it’s a smile nonetheless. You point at him. “Reinhard van Astrea,” you repeat after him. The vowels aren’t all quite correct, but that’s not an issue. He nods, smiling. Then, you point at yourself and share your own name, which he then repeats. Maybe it’s something to do with his pronunciation, or simply the relief of having fostered understanding with someone else in this city, but that’s the first time that Reinhard hears you laugh, loud and without reservation. It is that very moment that time seems to freeze, that it flits through his head that he cannot let something this precious go.
From the outside looking in though, it doesn’t seem to you that anything momentous has happened. You’ve started to doubt your ‘main character’ status, though. The man that is busying himself to make you at ease looks like he’s appeared straight out of an otome game with unnaturally bright hair and eyes to boot. He’s gorgeous to the point that it’s almost unnatural. That it’s reminiscent of a piece of art in a museum. The idea that he’s way, way out of your league is an immediate, unquestioned assumption.
Reinhard accompanies you throughout town, never straying far from your side. After mulling a little bit over a ways to communicate with you, he asks a shopkeeper for some paper and a pen, making little sketches to attempt to clarify things. He draws a rough approximation of a house and a questioning tilt of his head. Then, some coins, then stick figures of people. You have to shake your head at all of the unspoken questions. No, you have no home, no money, and no people to return to. By the end of it, your face runs hot with shame and you think you might start to cry all over again.
It’s Reinhard who, in the end, assures that you have a roof over your head and money to spend. You have no idea how to make it up to him. Not the mention, you don’t even have the words to express your gratitude. It’s a little one-room apartment that he’s bought for you in a quieter neighbourhood of the capital and your first self-imposed goal is to pay him back. The most people such as yourself can do around town is menial labour: lugging goods around, cleaning as a maid or anything of the sort. It’s either this, or do nothing inside of your room all day. You prefer the work, even if it’s exhausting.
Reinhard really only accepts the money you present him with to stop you from feeling worse about the situation. As soon as he figured out what you were doing, he’d taken you to a more reputable home in the city as soon as he got, acting as your ‘translator’ when you asked why. Of course, with him vouching for you, there was no question about the job or your higher salary.
He’s away for long stretches of time, but when he’s around he’s teaching you bits and pieces of the language. Reinhard isn’t the best at teaching though he tries his best. You pick up most of the language through listening to others speak, to struggling your way through novels after he taught you the script. All he asks for in return is for you to teach him a little of your own language to even better communicate with you. (You try not to think to hard about how it’s a language that, in this world, will die with you.)
Around you, he recalls what he was like as a young child. Shy, almost, at times struggling to figure out what to say. It’s an entirely unfamiliar feeling. Reinhard does feel a bit bad about keeping you in the dark. He purposefully doesn’t teach you some of the words people refer to him with. He doesn’t want you to change the way you look at him.
The same goes for his courting attempts. Any attempt at romance from him seems to fly over your head. (As previously stated, you consider him so far out of your league that it simply doesn’t cross your mind as a possibility.) Reinhard can accept that. For now, at least, and as long as you do not take another.
He values the little pretend life you’ve built together, even though it’s built on an unsteady foundation. Reinhard starts to yearn for the next time he can spend moments by your side, that he can go ‘home’ and see your face light up. He doesn’t know what he’d do if anything happened to you. Because of that, he must ensure he stays close, though he cannot avoid being sent away more often than he’d like. Selfishly, he continues to pay for your things even as you gain the means to look after yourself. It makes him feel better about it all.
If Reinhard is a force of nature, then you are caught in the eye of the storm. There’s little he needs to do about things such as romantic rivals or possible dangers to your life. Reinhard van Astrea’s shadow looms over you through your close association alone, even if you aren’t aware of it, and shapes the way people carry themselves around you. In the case there were those who overstepped, a request from Reinhard would be enough to get them to back off.
He doesn’t want you to be unhappy, he truly doesn’t. But when you complain that you cannot seem to make real friends with anyone, that there’s always this kind of… Distance and discomfort you can’t explain, he’s a little happy that he’s there to fill that gap. Once he has the courage, he’ll tell you how he feels. Your response will dictate whether you stay stable, or get swept out in the currents.
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nick-writes-stuff · 1 month ago
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You and Me 'til the End, Right?
Kang Dae-ho x gn!reader
!warnings: canon-typical violence, descriptions of panic attacks and PTSD, manhandling/forced pat down (idk how to phrase that one), swearing, very hurt with eventual comfort
a/n: DAE-HO FIC TIME! HELL YEAH! I'm so down bad for this man. this is the iconic "helping dae-ho with his panic attack" fix-it fic bc holy shit he needs a hug. hope you enjoy <3
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You had been fighting off an anxiety attack since Gi-hun and the others began their plan to usurp control of the games. You almost wanted to tell them not to do it. It likely wouldn't end well for all of you, and the idea that any of them could get hurt or worse scared you shitless.
You felt even more worried when Dae-ho volunteered to help. You could see from his face that he really didn't want to do it, but refusing was hardly what would be expected from an ex-marine. He didn't want to let anyone else down. Especially Jung-bae. If he was going, then how could he say no? Even though the idea of holding a gun again made him sick to his stomach.
You were observant, but you were especially observant of Dae-ho as you found it hard not to be entranced by his charm. This made you seem the little things he thought he masked well. During the six-legged race, you saw him flinch after every single shot fired. His gaze went distant, and his jaw clenched. One night while on watch, you heard him murmuring and tossing around in his sleep, clearly having a nightmare. He had never said it specifically, but you knew his time in the Marines had not been a happy one. Not at all. Which is what scared you about him volunteering for the ensuing gunfight.
As he started to walk toward Hyun-ju and Gi-hun, you grabbed his wrist to get his attention. He turned back to look at you.
"Be careful, okay?" You said softly.
He gave you a boyish smile. "Of course." He said. You could see how tense he was, however. He definitely wasn't 100% on board with this plan. You could tell from the way his hand trembled when he reached out for the gun.
Watching your strongest allies and closest friends walk out that door was one of the hardest things you have ever done. You couldn't even say proper goodbyes, and you didn't know if any of them were ever going to come back.
You started pacing back and forth after only a moment after they left. You couldn't just stand there. You needed to expel your nervous energy somehow. You also started absent-mindedly picking at your cuticles, a nervous habit you've had no success in breaking.
You didn't know how this was going to go. Sure, the players had the element of surprise, but they had a lot less resources than the guards. You could hear the echoes of gunshots from down the hall. They were far away, but they still made you feel uneasy. The guards could easily storm this room in retaliation.
After a few minutes, the other players had mostly returned back to normal, except most of them were now sitting behind some form of cover. You envied their ability to calm their emotions, but you also knew that, for the Os certainly, it was likely due to indifference. The more people who died in the rebellion meant the less competition and higher prize pool. The thought of it made you sick to your stomach. You couldn't imagine anyone being so callous about a human life, but the people in the games weren't the most morally upstanding.
You continued to pace, despite Jun-hee's half-hearted pleas for you to join them behind cover. You couldn't sit still right now. You were never able to handle anxiety well.
This continued on for a while. Eventually, Geum-ja said, "They are gonna wear holes in the floor at this rate." You didn't respond to her.
You glanced at the door, finally stopping when you saw Dae-ho walk back in. You let out a breath you didn't know you were holding. You rushed over to him as he dropped down in front of the guard nearest the door.
He seemed frantic. He was trembling as he walked, hardly able to make it to his destination. You could hear him mumbling something, but you couldn't make it out. You felt your heart wrench watching him in this state.
You approached him cautiously. You didn't want to scare him more than he already was. "Dae-ho? What's going on?" You asked. He whipped his head up, fumbling around in the guard's pocket. "Why are you here by yourself?" You heard Player 7 chime in from behind you. Seems like you weren't the only one concerned.
"There's ammo in their pockets." He stammered, stuttering through the words. The man's eyes were both distant and wild at the same time. Like he was experiencing the worst thing imaginable, but his mind wasn't fully present either. "They ran out of ammo. I need to get it. Quickly." He said, his voice growing louder and more frantic. You turned back to look at Yong-sik and he nodded. The two of you sprang to action, alongside his mother and Jun-hee (as much as she could help.)
You laid out your jacket, and you all set the magazines on top of it. It would let him carry it out without the risk of dropping them. Yong-sik folded up the fabric and handed it to Dae-ho. "I think this is all of it." He said. Dae-ho stuttered out a thank you before grabbing the stockpile and walking out toward the hall.
You resumed pacing without even thinking about it. Eventually, you winced and looked down to realize you had pulled a hangnail and made your finger bleed. You looked to see Dae-ho running back into the room with his hands clamped over his ears. His eyes looked far away.
"Dae-ho, what happened?" Yong-sik asked. He didn't even acknowledge the man spoke. He just went to go sit on a bed. You met Yong-sik's eyes before taking a deep breath. You were terrified. You couldn't deny that. But if it meant sparing Dae-ho from that traumatic experience, you would do it for him. You started walking toward the door saying, "I'll go. I'll go run it out to th-"
"No! Please don't! You can't, please!" Dae-ho called out, panicking at the thought of you putting yourself in danger. His breathing quickened, gripping his hair tightly with his fingers.
You turned on your heel, taking in a sharp inhale. You couldn't do that to him. You would never forgive yourself if you didn't make it back. He didn't deserve that. He didn't deserve to lose another important person in his life. You walked to him without hesitation.
He sat against the wall, knees pressed against his chest. His hands were clamped over his ears, rocking back and forth slightly.
You stood at the foot of the bed. "Dae-ho?" You called out, not wanting to scare him. His frightened eyes looked up at you. "Can I sit?" You asked. He didn't respond for a few seconds, but he eventually gave a small nod.
You sat on the foot of the bed near him. His breathing was still fast and shallow. You tested the waters by lightly brushing your arm against his shin. He didn't react to that. You decided to try the techniques that worked to calm you during a panic attack. You had been so used to Dae-ho being your rock during your times of anxiety that this was unfamiliar territory for you.
You started by lightly tapping on the top of his shoe at an even pace. You knew that having some rhythmic stimuli could be grounding during your panic attacks. You soon transitioned it to gently running your hand up and down his shin. You synced that motion to your own breathing, trying to model deep breaths for him to follow.
The only time you said anything was when the echoes of the gunfire carried into the room. Anytime it happened, he would start breathing faster and tensing up. He pushed his hands over his ears hard enough that you thought it was probably hurting him. When this would happen, you would move your hand to his shoulder. "Hey. It's okay. You're safe, okay? I'm right here with you," You murmured, soft eyes meeting his wide ones.
After a few moments, he would relax slightly, and you would resume the motion you were doing before. You found that in the longer stretches of silence in between the gunfire, he would start to shakily match your breathing, but any progress made would be erased once he heard it again.
This happened a few times before you saw Hyun-ju run back into the room. "Dae-ho?" She called out, not sure if he was in the room. Yong-sik and his mother pointed in the direction of the two of you. She looked in disbelief at him before marching over there.
You gave her a pleading look, shaking your head. You understood she was probably angry for him abandoning the mission without a word, but this wasn't the right time to do this. She came over, reaching her hand to grab onto the bedframe above the bed you were on.
Dae-ho flinched back violently at her movement. You felt your heart drop at the sight. Did he... did he assume she was gonna hit him? You tried not to start crying at the ramifications of that action. He had to have had something like that happen to him in the past. How could anyone do that to him? You couldn't fathom it. Life can be so cruel sometimes. No one deserves that.
"Dae-ho. What happened?" She demanded, her voice stern. You wanted to ask her to leave, tell her to lay off for a second. But you knew she wouldn't leave because her anger was justified in the moment. How many people died because of the ammo running out? But how could she blame him for this? He was clearly going through hell right now both in reality and in his mind.
He started hyperventilating, muttering out repeated apologies without looking her in the eye. She looked taken aback by his reaction. You looked up at her and shook your head. "Not now. Please." You said softly. Her gaze softened before she turned and walked away.
You weren't expecting all hell to break loose in a matter of moments. The large rolling door in the front of the room slammed open. Pink soldiers rushing into the room, one shooting into the air. Dae-ho cried out, starting to tremble violently. "Dae, it's okay. It's okay, I promise." You said, but your voice betrayed you as it shook from your own nerves.
"Everyone! On your stomachs, now!" A guard with a square mask ordered. You looked back at him. "Hey, can you do that for me? Lay down on your stomach, okay?" You asked, trying to keep your voice calm. He didn't react. You grimaced. "Dae, I need you to get on your stomach right now, okay? Please, it's really important. Just for a minute, okay?" you begged, willing your tears to not drop from your eyes.
The triangle guards quickly approached the players. All were on the floor except the two of you. You watched as they searched the others, confiscating the guns from behind Hyun-ju's cover.
One guard walked up to the two of you. "On your stomach. Now." He demanded. You looked up at the triangle. "Please, sir. He's not in his right mind. He doesn't have anything, just let h-" You pleaded, being interrupted by him pointing the gun at you, finger ready on the trigger. You instinctively raised your hands, sliding off the bed and onto the floor.
You finally broke and started crying when you didn't hear Dae-ho move. "Dae, please." You cried out. The guard motioned for another to join him. Luckily, you didn't have to see it, but the two of them forced him to get on his stomach to pat him down. Hearing it was probably worse. He was crying, as well as wailing apologies and begging for his and your safety. It was too hard for you to listen to.
Just as quickly as they stormed the room to take control of it, they took all of the guns and ammo and left the room. No one knew what was going to happen, but you knew what you were going to do. You got up and started to lay on the bed next to him. He instantly understood what you were trying to do. He moved to bury his face into the side of your neck, arm draped across your waist.
In any other situation, you would be a blushing mess in this position, but you didn't have the time to overthink this. You two were close, but you didn't think you had been this close before to justify this intimate gesture. But you both just went through a lot together. The last 20 minutes had felt like you had just spent years with each other.
One of your hands found its way into his hair, gently running your fingers through it. Your other hand rubbed up and down his arm, once again matching the rhythm to your deep breathing. You continued to whisper to him softly, hoping it did something to calm him down. "Dae, it's okay. You're safe. Try to match my breathing if you can."
The doors rolled open again, but this time, he didn't jump to look at the noise. You took that as a sign that he was starting to relax. You looked over to see what was going on, just to see the forklifts carrying the black wooden coffins. You hated them. Putting the red bows on it felt like one final slap in the face. The soldiers began going to the bodies and scanning the chips in their ear. Player elimination announcements started over the PA system. You also noticed they were scanning the guards' masks, but there was no announcement. Maybe the guards weren't treated so differently than the players.
You rested your chin on the top of his head. You hoped it would stop him from turning to look. He didn't need to see that right now.
While listening to the announcements intently, you realized that the players who left to fight were also being scanned. You heard an announcement for Player 246, who you knew went out with the others. That put you on edge, but you tried not to physically react so as not to alert Dae-ho.
However, he was also listening closely to the announcements. He may not have seemed like it, but he was hanging on the robotic voice's every word.
You both were dreading hearing a specific number. You mentally pleaded with whatever higher power out there to not hear the three words that would break him even more than he was.
But life can be so cruel.
"Player 390, eliminated."
Dae-ho let out a strangled sob, starting to cry and tremble in your arms. You started crying as well, but you tried not to let him know that. You were crying for two reasons. Jung-bae was a close friend here, but you were mostly crying because of Dae-ho. Your empathy was overwhelming you. This isn't fair. Why does he have to go through this? He doesn't deserve it. Your best friend was going through hell right now, and you were so mad at the universe for subjecting him to this.
Soon after, you heard an announcement for Young-il, but you think Dae-ho was too absorbed with his grief to hear it.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. It's all my fault. It's my fault, I'm sorry." He started repeating. He was having trouble getting the words out through his tears.
"Hey, hey. It's not your fault, okay? None of this is your fault." You said back. You wished you could make him believe that, but you knew that would be a fruitless endeavor. This situation wasn't one you could just get over easily. This was likely something that would haunt him for the rest of his life. And you vowed that you would be there to help him through it whenever he needed you.
You didn't know how long you stayed like this. It had to have been hours. Eventually, he calmed down enough that he wasn't constantly trembling, but he didn't move from that position. At some point, you heard him start to snore softly. You almost cried upon hearing it. You were just so happy that he felt safe enough with you that he trusted to watch over him.
And that you did. You tried to stay awake as long as you could. There was one time in the night when he started to tense up, mumbling something in his sleep. His breathing was quicker and more shallow. He was clearly having a nightmare. You started running your hand up and down his back, your other hand carding through his hair. You hushed him quietly. "It's okay, Dae. You're safe. Go back to sleep, okay?" You murmured. Eventually, he relaxed once again. You gave a slight smile at this. Against your will, you too drifted off to sleep soon after.
You woke up to the lights turning on with a bright intensity. Apparently, after the excitement of the evening before, no one felt like repeating the brawls that had become commonplace. You all knew that the gamemakers weren't messing around anymore. They were getting ready to start handing out breakfast.
You gently shook Dae-ho's shoulder. "Dae? It's time to get up, okay?" You said softly.
He slowly started to wake up. He pulled away rather abruptly when he noticed the position the two of you were in. His face was beet red, but he didn't say anything. He got out of the bed and stood up shakily. You followed him after, letting yourself take a large stretch and a yawn.
His gaze still seemed intense, but he was definitely calmer than he was the night before. You tried to gauge how he was feeling with small talk. "It looks like they are passing out breakfast." You said before looking up at him, asking, "What do you think it'll be?" He looked over at you, but he didn't say anything.
You didn't show any disappointment at his lack of response. You knew he probably wasn't feeling up to it, and that was totally fine. You didn't want to shame him for that. "Personally, I think they should give us that soboro bread. That was surprisingly good." You said. He gave a weak smile and nodded, something that brought a smile to your face.
"We should probably go get in line." You suggested. He looked at the group of players before back at you. "We could always wait and get in line once everyone gets their food." You offered. He didn't acknowledge your statement, so you assumed you would just wait.
Once a majority of the players went through the line, he held out his hand to you. You couldn't stop the blush rising to your face, but you smiled and grabbed his hand. You walked over with him, hand in hand.
When you walked back, you took a moment to scan the room for your allies left. Geum-ja and Yong-sik were talking with Jun-hee and Myung-gi like normal. Hyun-ju's gaze was intense and her body was tense. She noticed you staring at her and turned her gaze to give you a slight glare. You frowned and looked back to Dae-ho, glad he wasn't looking toward her. You sat down against the wall, tapping the spot next to you to beckon him to sit. He hesitantly slid down the wall.
You tried not to be distracted by how close you were, but every time your shoulders brushed against each other, you felt electricity flood your body. You opened the bag, mildly disappointed when you saw it was just a hard-boiled egg and a carton of milk. "Damn." You muttered under your breath.
Dae-ho hesitantly opened the bag, taking the food out and just staring at it for a moment. You wouldn't be surprised that he didn't have an appetite, but it was important for him to eat regardless. Before you could urge him to eat, he started to unwrap the egg. This brought a smile to your face. You ate your own food.
Dae-ho passed you his carton of milk. "For last night." He said, turning to look at you.
You shook your head. "How many times did you help calm me down? I was a wreck after Mingle. Call it even." You said before taking a sip of your own milk.
He pushed the carton toward you again. "Last night was different. It looks like you hardly slept." He said quietly.
You looked up at him, gently grabbing his wrist and pushing it away from you. "No. It's fine." You insisted, a light smirk on your face.
He relented. He gave a slight smile at your persistence before opening it and taking a drink of the milk.
After a few moments of silence, he looked over at you. "Thank you. For everything."
You looked up at him, eyebrows furrowed in a look of confusion. "That's what friends are for, right?" You said softly.
He took a tense breath. "I've never really had someone who would do that for me." He said, looking away with a light pink dusting on his cheeks.
Your breath hitched in your throat. You knew that he didn't have the best upbringing, so while you felt bad that he didn't have that support growing up, you felt some sense of honor that you were able to earn his trust. You smiled softly. "I'd do anything for you." You said.
He looked back at you with wide eyes. He nodded his head. He nudged your shoulder lightly. "You and me 'til the end, right?" He said quietly.
You grinned and nodded back. "I wouldn't have it any other way." You replied.
You both knew what you were agreeing to. You two were the last ones from the alliance formed before the six-legged race. You had his back, and he had yours. No matter what, you were both getting out of here together. You didn't say the words, but the love you two had for each other was evident.
You finished off your milk carton before yawning. You leaned your head on his shoulder. It gave him instant butterflies in his stomach.
"I think I know how we can settle our scores." He said.
You looked up at him. He had a mischievous glint in his eye, something that brought you some needed relief. "They are already settled, but continue." You said.
"Take a nap while we have the time. I'll watch out for you." He said.
You nodded. "You don't need to tell me twice." You said with a laugh.
You leaned against his shoulder with another yawn. You grabbed his hand and intertwined your fingers. You let your eyes close, and it wasn't long until he felt your breathing deepen.
He looked down at you with a smile. He pressed a kiss to the top of your head before leaning his head against yours. He absent-mindedly rubbed the back of your thumb with his own.
He still wasn't feeling one hundred percent yet, and there was a lot more he needed to work through for himself. But he would try to be his best for you. And he was sure he would fight tooth and nail to get you both out of here.
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