#but at the same time it's so deeply unintentionally insulting to them

[messymindofmine]

Fandoms and Marginalized Communities

Before I say anything, I want to make it known that everything I say, I am saying as Muslim WOC. I am also saying it as someone with a best friend who is the reason I got into Lone Star to begin with. This best friend is a gay, Jewish man who is also a recovering addict. One of the first things he said to me about the show was that it felt like TK Strand was written especially for him. However, my friend (who was in the fandom since the beginning) left a while back because he finally decided he was sick of feeling unsafe in the fandom. This was a feeling he had since the beginning that had gotten progressively worse.

As disappointing as it has been since s4 to see the way people turned on Carlos, I do appreciate how many people are calling it out. Even though I don't come from the same background as Carlos, I do know what it is like to come from a culture that pushes you into a heteronormative role and so I can empathize with Carlos on his reasoning for marrying Iris and then keeping it a secret even if I wish he had told TK sooner. But then of course he felt like he couldn't because when you have spent your whole life feeling like you could be rejected for revealing something about yourself, it's extremely hard to move beyond it.

That said, I do think it is important as a fandom to talk about reactions we have to characters and why we need to check our own biases. I'm not saying that people have to agree and love every single thing that Carlos does but we can and should give grace to him and consider why he is doing something. It is deeply problematic to assume that he is going to be a bad, neglectful husband the way people were prior to 5X05. Same with how people reacted towards him in s4. You can be upset about a character's decisions while also being compassionate about why they are behaving that way. To go "well they suck and are bad" and interpret every single thing they do with the worst-faith interpretation is deeply problematic when discussing a character of color.

I have been having conversations with the friend I mentioned before about all this stuff and one thing that he said to me that has stuck with me is how one big reason why he left the fandom was because he kept seeing people bring up the ableism TK has gotten since the start of the show in conversations about Carlos and racism and to him it felt deeply insulting because it felt like those people were just using ableism as a way to deflect from the conversation about Carlos and not because they actually care about the issue. Especially since so many of them are the same ones that never had anything to say about the ableism in the past and even indulged in it before s4 when they turned on Carlos. @paperstorm and I have also talked about this and how it's so frustrating that when a conversation is being had about racism, people who have never cared about ableism before will bring it up as a weapon. I do feel like it is extremely important to have conversations about ableism in the fandom because just like racism, misogyny and homophobia, it has been an issue in every fandom I have ever been a part of but bringing it up in the context of a conversation about racism towards Carlos is not the right time and only serves to diminish the seriousness of ableism as an issue. It is not a weapon to be used to deflect and silence people who are hurt by how Carlos has been treated since s4.

That said, I do want to acknowledge the frustration and hurt that I know a lot of people are feeling when it seems like conversations about Carlos are being had in a way that conversations about TK have never really been had. There are people who have talked about TK and ableism but those conversations have been on a pretty small scale. I get the hurt because I feel it too seeing big blogs talking about Carlos and racism and even unintentionally making it seem as though TK has always been favored by the fandom because he is white. I know that it can be hurtful to see people say that Carlos is only getting hate because he is no longer perfect for TK as though TK wasn't the one on the receiving end of hate since 1x02. It is important to acknowledge that Carlos was put on a pedestal right up until s4 and defense of him was done at the expense of TK. When 3x13 aired, people were outright accusing TK of cheating with Cooper and just generally hating on him because they felt he made Carlos sad by excluding him. This was actually deeply triggering for my friend because he is in recovery himself. Let me tell you, it was painful for me to see how much it hurt him seeing the way TK was called selfish and all kind of other things because it is something he has to live with on a daily basis in his own life. There have been so many times since the show first started that people have said things about how Carlos deserves better and how TK just doesn't love Carlos as much as Carlos loves him. How TK gets all the care and attention and he never does anything for Carlos. How TK gets special treatment from the fandom. All of these things and so much more. And then in s4, when these same people turned on Carlos and started using TK as a weapon, it became too much for my friend and he left the fandom. I know he is not the only one who did so for the same reason.

I just wish that people would understand that conversations about TK and Carlos can both be had and we can even talk about how bigotry towards different groups are ultimately the same in the way they are perpetuated. That is to say, it's not always they obvious ways of using slurs but in the way of microaggressions. I also think it is important when defending Carlos to not ignore the hate TK has gotten. I'm not saying we have to bring it up in detail in every conversation but simply just not making it seem like TK gets favored. There was a double standard against TK right from 1x02 and it's not fair to ignore that. Actually, even the way people weaponize TK is a big microaggression. To act like somehow he has no agency in his own marriage and that he is going to fall apart if he doesn't have Carlos' attention is a big microaggression because it leans into this idea of addicts being selfish and weak. The TK that exists in the show is the opposite of both these things and it is just as offensive to speak about him as though he is those things as it is to make Carlos out to be a terrible, neglectful husband.

Overall, we all need to be more careful about how we speak and write about characters. And even if our only intention for wanting a character to make a mistake is to maximize angst, we need to be careful about how we project our desire for angst. Wanting Carlos to mess up because the angst potential of it is exciting is still a microaggression both because it villainizes him unfairly and because it takes agency away from TK. The same applies the other way round too. Wanting TK to mess up for the sake of angst (as has happened) is also a microaggression because it villainizes him unfairly and it takes agency away from Carlos. When we talk about characters that represent marginalized communities of any kind, we need to take these things into consideration. We also need to listen to others when these issues are called out. If your response to someone pointing out something that is offensive is anger and deflection, that is on you. As someone who has been in this fandom since the beginning and has seen people leave because they feel unsafe for any reason, I don't want that to happen to anyone else. We can have fun and escape real life in fandom while also calling things out. We can also call out one issues without ignoring or minimizing others. I know it can be a hard thing to balance sometimes but the best thing for us to do when it comes to situations like this is to be open-minded and willing to learn and grow ourselves rather than lashing out at others for speaking up about something that hurts them.

[chaos-dumpster-fire]

hi avi hi avi hi avi!!!!!! thinking abt avery again .:3. does he interact w/ any of his other coworkers?? whats his relationships like w/ them if so?? OH MOST IMPORTANTLY what is his opinions on like . the foundation (/ the o5?) itself? .:3

Woo-hooo! Sorry, had to go play w/niece for a bit (gonna go back down once i've answered this) butttttt:

Avery does interact, usually in person. He wasn't a big fan of hi-tech even before The Day (was forced to buy a Nokia for work and was deeply unhappy that he even had that), but will concede to email and fax (fax is better than email, in person is better than fax). Has rerouted his desk phone to be an old-school rotary but still display who's calling if it's a higher-up, and hangs up on everyone else who wasn't on his "I have notified you I will call at approx [X] time" list. He's a little hater.

Office wise, his coworker's opinions range from "he's nuts but better him than me taking the wrath of the Director" (minimal wrath, minimal interactions) to "Very odd guy, but overall good". He's awkward, he's unintentionally brusque (Ukr-Rus upbringing kicking in there, Slav coworkers don't feel this nearly as much), and despite being the sort of person normally who's down to chat, the paranoia really fucks over his ability to socialize or trust people. At the same time, his coworker social skill deficiency (and refusal to answer the phone) is made up for by his quick and correct work, the fact that you can send a lot of weirder shit to him (effectively can do paperwork in 4 languages AND can check it for cognitohazards) and that he is, despite general oddity, a chill man.

The few times he gets out or politics has come up, he's very blunt about the fact that most things are between a person and their beliefs, and that everyone needs to mind their own damn business about 'correct' behavior (he can't vote or do shit about politics so don't ask him his thoughts on government, but he will loudly and plainly shut down bigoted bullshit around him (again, queer and immigrant household and upbringing, very limited ability to give a fuck) and got into a fistfight w/Iceberg that one time over sexism).

After a few years, he can do small talk conversations and he's not awful before that (again, any expression of a problem and will offer to help if he can* (*This is not always a good thing)), but fundamentally he can't let his guard down about being caught/discovered and terminated, so he refuses to form closer relationships. There's Angela and the can of worms in his memories there, there's the hatred of Iceberg (grudging respect given for paperwork, again if Iceberg wasn't loudly sexist and didn't call Avery a freak they have been closer friends than almost anyone else in the office), and there's the only-person-i-sorta-trust with Kon, but that's about it for close friends. In general, most people who see past 'cold and efficient weirdo' read him as a guy who's lost a lot and hates remembering that there used to be something outside of this, so just let sleeping dogs lie and don't interfere.

MTF teams get on a bit better because it's a physical job, it's mostly in-person or over radio contact (no phones or laptops required of Avery), they usually compliment his artistic work and because the general demeanor is a lot more causal and blunt, his temperament is usually taken for more of 'deadpan with a sense of humor' than 'asshole'. The continuous contact over hours and days (even weeks) really helps with that engagement, and the fact that he doesn't like talking about his past isn't as odd to teams that regularly have high mortality or trauma rates. Helps that he's got reasonably good survival skills and is good enough at combat to survive and hold his own in small-scale issues. Downside is that when there's an argument, it's a big fucking argument. The worst was very much with Agent M and almost got Avery shot, but there's been a few brawls, lots of insults, and a surprisingly low rate of the fights directly fucking up the missions. It also really, really helps that they can be chill w/him without having to talk for months between missions. Still won't trust them with big secrets, but they know of a handful of his pre-Day explorations and he can compete in 'Badass Scar' type pissing contests pretty well. Sometimes he doodles people before or after missions (or during if it's a veeeeery chill and safe mission) and if they like it, he gives them the drawings. otherwise they go over his bed labelled w/the name and context. He's building up new connections.

Admin wise, they are the second enemy right after Alto Clef and anyone he's training to eliminate reality-benders. Avery is only in the system in the flimsiest ways possible, and if anything goes wrong in his paperwork ever, it can flag very easily. The exception to this is Tech Support, whom he visits in person (lugging along a 20-pound brick of a laptop that can be used for Foundation work, accessing academic databases, and nothing else). They hate that he comes in person and then refuses to leave until they fix it, but he's patient, he does listen, and his errors are neither user error or anomalous (it's not even usually that his laptop is the sort of thing that the 50s would have found dated, it's that very occasionally something in settings or software breaks on a disturbing level and combing through this would be far, far easier if he was using literally any other laptop ever but he will not).

While there's technically money on his account, it's not exactly shit he can withdraw unless it's through Kon or Financial (again, will not talk to Financial with a gun to his head), so he's fucked unless they're paying in cash or he's purchasing from inside the Foundation (can charge his ID card) (yes, this is why the muggings occasionally happen, how else can he get clothes without stealing them from dead bodies).

As for the Foundation itself, Avery's feelings are- complicated. He got recruited fairly young (between AP classes and a college overload finished his Bachelors in 3 years and was recruited partway through the Masters at 23).

Pre- That Day he loved getting to see these things, getting to understand the universe as it is, and it was cool to put artistic skills to good use (I think his Masters was aiming either at antique restoration or art history for painting restoration) in a way that would guarantee a living. Decent pay, sends you around the world, allows for a certain amount of personal eccentricity that most places wouldn't. At the same time, the Horrors are just- just there full fucking time and not only did the job erode at time with family and friends, it's definitely worsened his issues with paranoia and caused some pretty severe injuries (fun fact: while Avery's hands being kinda shaky when he's not doing shit was a thing before too, he has suffered nerve damage from in-field operations), not to mention the weirdness of knowing you and your coworkers could die at any minute and your family won't have a body or a coherent answer.

Post- Day it's worse. He wouldn't have lose his reality if he wasn't working for the Foundation, he's sure of that. The Foundation's effectively taken away everything, down to his memories. At the same time, it's all he has now. He can't leave, he can't quit, he has no documents or existence here. The Foundation is his home in this reality and he will die in service to it, if they don't kill him on suspicion of being a threat (a suspicion that wouldn't exist if not for him being screwed over by, again, the Foundation). He hates them but he also chose this, and he can't regret that choice as much as he should. He's trying to see the good side in things, telling himself that what he does provides identification for tech-averse anomalies, that he's helped save people during missions (and been saved in turn), that if he has no choice, he should make as much of it as he can. He's never going to be fully ok with the place, but he's trying to be content.

[notsurewhereiam]

tws for child abuse, rape apologia, transmisogyny

Thinking about that time I got into a fight with another (white) trans woman on Twitter over cisgender asexuals.

At the time, I’d been pissed off that there were cisgender asexuals acting as if transgender people as a whole were gatekeeping being in the LGBT community from them on the same level of power as cisgender lesbians, bisexuals, and gay men.

Then when I tried talking about how transgender asexuals exist and that cisgender asexuals still had significant power over transgender people by virtue of their being cisgender I was confronted by another trans woman over it.

So her POV was that by saying that cisgender asexuals still had (gender based) power over transgender people that I was not taking seriously the effects of acephobia. When I had just finished telling her that there were ace transgender people negatively effected by cisgender ace people’s transphobia.

She then accused me of being a rape apologist including of child sexual abuse and well if you know anything about my past, you’d know just how deeply triggering that shit was.

From cisgender women calling the cops on me because being a trans woman in public, to all the years I was being molested only to have adults tell me to my face that I deserved it because ‘pedophile queers find each other’.

So I freaked out on her a bit. I was not calm or collected or acting with any sense, and in hindsight I regret a lot of what I said. Like telling her we should settle this with a fist fight and insisting she pick the time and place.

Idk having her, as another trans woman, accuse me of not caring and having been an accessory to rape and sexual violence just because I’d been talking about cisgender people’s bigotry even when they were asexual it really set me off.

I mean this isn’t the first time I’ve had other white transgender women treat me like dogshit before.

When I was actively homeless while going to college, lots of classed white trans women I knew accused me of being ‘overly aggressive’ and ‘emotional for no reason’ after a rich cisgender gay white man screamed at me for making a wealth inequality joke at his expense.

Other times I’ve had middle aged liberal white trans women (who’d just come out while I was living my whole TS life for years) talk down to me about my own experiences with hyper surveillance/ police violence because the lack of representation in the 70s-80s somehow mattered more than actual material conditions.

And most of the time I’d say nothing or apologize or stay quiet about getting talked down to or insulted. s

But that one person calling me a rape apologist… I’d exploded at her. And not in a way that was satisfying or entirely morally righteous either.

In the aftermath, I’d felt awful but I was still too frustrated and pissed off at her to apologize for any of the not great shit I did say like calling her a ‘bitch’ and a ‘cunt’. She’d blocked me anyway by that point but I wouldn’t have taken back what I said even if I could.

And the thing is too, acephobia is a real thing with real world consequences. I’d never said it wasn’t, I’d just affirmed that there’d been plenty of ignorant cis ace people who were still transphobic acting like transness was just another ‘sexuality’.

But idk sometimes online or in public you can try your best to make your views clear and other people will unintentionally or intentionally misunderstand you completely. It sucks but there’s only so much you can do. Shrug.

[fanofthings20]

Hey if u don't mind can I ask what all the alpha and omega whatnot things mean? Like I know they're ranks but ehat that really means if that makes sense?

I don't mind any you asking this at all! I hope my attempts to answer your question is helpful to you.

I’ve gotten my take on alphas & omegas from a couple different sources. & felt inspired by other writers who have written mean girl fics with this topic too.

The basic description I came across about alphas and omegas came from @WolGirlLover20 on Wattpad in their book “The Unofficial Guide To The OmegaVerse”. But I've read a lot of sources, and for Protective Marks, it's slightly a mix of those sources and how I personally picture this mean girl's world version might be.

I personally view Alpha's as the top of the chain of command. They are typically level-headed and sensible unless you mess with someone they deeply care for, both in a romantic or platonic way, from whom they consider their pack members. They are extremely protective of those they let into their pack and can be really aggressive. There are no set-in-stone characteristics for how they see and treat both regular humans and other ranks.

Alpha's can be

are gentle souls who care for everyone the same way

self-absorbed idiots who think they are better than others and deserve to be treated as royalty will attack anyone who says differently, no matter their rank.

a small majority sit back and hide in the shadows observing everyone and thing and won't act unless they deem it a necessary move.

Even though they are ranked as alphas, that doesn't mean they are invincible. They can still be injured and affected in the same mental ways as humans (PTSD, Panic attacks, ADHD, etc.) As Alphas, they do have enhanced physical strength, healing, immune system, pheromones, etc.

As for Omega', they are the lowest rank and, from the gist of what sources I've read, are supposed to be more submissive to the alpha that has claimed them. In most fics omegas are oppressed and controlled by both the government and their alphas.

For me personally, I view omegas as equals to the other ranks in the ways of being able to attend schools, hold down jobs, living their life how they see fit. That doesn't mean that all alphas will treat them as equals or not give them a hard time, but not all alphas are uncaring. Omegas can achieve anything they want to do.

But when they find the alpha, they choose to be with him. They are submissive to an extent. They feel a desire to care for their alphas as much as the alpha cares for them, it's an equal pick-and-pull mating. Omegas who are mated can be the only thing that can pull the alphas out of an aggression against someone who has intentionally or unintentionally caused their omega harm or insulted them.

To be completely honest, this is the first A/O/B verse fic I've attempted, so my personal take on these ranks and how they are portrayed in the story will probably change in ways as time goes along. But I hope this has helped answer your question. Feel free to ask any questions about anything, and I promise to answer any questions to the best of my ability.

[shvdwscng]

"you  ought  to,  but  your  far  too  insolent  with  your  mouth  around  me."  all  of  which  she  might  have  encouraged  unintentionally.  she  admired  his  nerve  still,  after  working  closer  to  her  in  his  new  role,  he  seemed  to  develop  his  confidence  around  her  quickly.  she  seldom  ignored  her  gut  instincts,  but  when  it  came  to  reading  people  it  had  been  her  best  weapon  after  her  mind.  daxton  was  quite  savy  and  skilled  with  his  words  when  it  was  required  of  him,  only  that  around  his  high  lady  he  chose  to  forgo  that  trait.  his  words  of  her  certain  hit  closer  to  him  not  due  to  the  dress,  but  of  her  recent  development."ah,  it  takes  a  lot  more  than  this  for  me  to  behave  so  outwardly.  though  i  know  you  would  enjoy  that  sight."  while  this  dress  had  been  an  accidental  choice,  she  would  not  deny  she  relished  in  the  way  cedrian's  gaze  lingered  on  her.  it  was  not  the  attention  of  the  rest  she  cared  for,  it  was  only  his.  although  she  knew  she  had  it.  her  mind  seemed  to  be  oddly  attuned  to  him,  whenever  she  felt  a  lingering  gaze  on  her  she  didn't  need  to  turn  to  know  it  was  cedrian.  she  certainly  was  behaving  a  bit  of  out  of  norm  with  the  time  she  was  spending  with  the  high  lord  of  day.  it  unsettled  her  as  deeply,  she  knew  better,  but  one  night  with  him  had  done  nothing  to  quell  her  desire  ;  all  it  did  was  magnify  it.  her  gaze  studied  dax's  attire,  which  compliment  him  in  every  manner,  he  was  a  handsome  man,  so  she  doubted  anything  would  look  unfavorable  on  suited  him.  she'd  seen  the  women  of  their  court  flock  around  him,  flirting  unabashedly,  which  never  failed  to  amuse  her  whenever  she'd  caught  of  it.

  "they  do.  moss  greens  and  auburns,  and  purples  are  also  good  choices  for  you."  she  told  him  sincerely,  but  she  was  also  a  bit  pleased  when  she  saw  her  people  donning  the  blues  that  were  known  for  summer.  "i'm  curious  of  this  bold  choice  of  skipping  an  undershirt.  are  we  trying  to  catch  the  eye  of  someone  special?"  it  had  been  working  on  ladies  here,  that  even  as  they  stood  speaking,  a  few  that  passed  by  them  looked  in  dax's  direction.  the  devious  sparkle  in  his  hazel  hues  told  alina  he  knew  far  more  than  she  would  have  liked.  she  would  not  insult  his  intelligence,  and  even  alina  knew  he'd  catch  onto  her  rather  improved  mood  tonight,  even  if  he  didn't  know  the  finer  details  of  her  involvement  with  cedrian.  "or  perhaps  you  are  not  doing  an  adequate  job  of  locating  me.  the  same  things  that  keep  other  high  rulers  as  busy."  oddly,  she  never  minded  his  presence  by  her  side  during  soirees,  she  didn't  know  when  that  had  become  something  she  took  comfort  in.  as  annoying  as  his  teasing  was  tonight,  dax's  company  was  never  unwanted.  he  never  pressed  for  more  answers,  even  if  he  did  wish  to  know  what  was  going  on  with  her  and  the  high  lord.  her  personal  affairs  remained  locked,  but  it  was  not  as  if  this  information  was  pertinent  to  anything.  a  part  of  her  alina  wondered  were  she  to  tell  him,  would  he  talk  her  out  of  it?  if  she  could  not  talk  herself  out  of  it,  would  dax  succeed?  for  all  his  teasing,  the  high  lady  did  not  know  how  he  would  feel  of  her  being  this  involved  with  another  high  ruler,  alliance  or  not.  though  she  and  ced  spoke  of  an  alliance,  they  still  spoke  very  little  of  politics  when  they  were  together.  "i  shall  grant  your  request  tonight,  dear  daxton,  you  may  have  your  high  lady's  time  this  evening  to  make  up  for  my  absence.  i  do  know  how  hard  it  is  for  you  to  go  hours  without  speaking  with  me."  the  very  least  his  presence  would  prevent  her  from  seeking  out  cedrian.  "tell  me,  how  is  the  night  treating  you?"

a  chuckle  slips  from  daxton,  not  unaware  of  his  words  in  the  slightest.  while  he  can  be  quite  skilled  in  the  art  of  being  subtle,  sly  words  masked  beneath  other  intentions,  he  does  not  play  that  game  at  all  with  the  high  lady.  “  do  i  need  to  be  ?  ”  he  counters,  that  smile  atop  his  lips  still  completely  present.  it’s  been  a  bit  since  the  pair  had  seen  one  another,  he’s  got  to  get  his  fun  in  while  he  can.  his  high  lady  had  been  quite  busy  as  of  late.  a  shrug  rolls  off  his  shoulders,  “  you  could  be  going  stir  crazy  and  making  decisions  out  of  the  normal,  high  lady.  ”  he  continues  to  tease.  in  truth,  he  didn’t  think  she  would  wear  something  in  such  a  public  space  to  impress  another.  alina  didn’t  have  to  vie  for  attention,  she  commanded  it  on  her  own.  if  the  high  lady  were  choosing  attire  solely  for  the  benefit  of  another,  it  would  likely  be  shown  off  in  private.  “  i  think  the  colors  become  me,  don’t  you  ?  ”  the  pale  blue  paired  well  with  his  hazel  eyes,  and  the  gold  accents  had  been  at  the  suggestion  of  the  seamstress.  daxton  only  had  the  request  to  have  lighter  fabrics,  which  had  clearly  been  interpreted  as  no  undershirt.  he  didn’t  mind,  but  it  was  probably  shocking  to  those  that  didn’t  know  the  summer  spymaster.  “  oh  but  i  can’t  pass  up  a  chance  to  speak  to  my  ever  so  elusive  high  lady.  she’s  been  quite  busy  as  of  late,  with  what  is  beyond  me. ”  the  sparkle  in  his  gaze  made  it  more  than  clear  that  daxton  knew  exactly  what  she  was  up  to.  he  was  too  smart  sometimes,  putting  together  clues  and  making  assumptions.  alina  hadn’t  admitted  anything,  and  daxton  hadn’t  asked,  but  he  would  be  hard  pressed  to  believe  that  alina  was  spending  her  time  with  anyone  else  other  than  the  high  lord  of  day.  in  truth,  he  wasn’t  entirely  sure  what  the  pair  did  behind  closed  doors,  but  the  slight  shine  alina  held  now  was  not  so  easily  missed  by  one  who  knew  her  so  well.  he  wouldn’t  pry  too  deeply,  he  didn’t  want  to  ruin  whatever  she  was  up  to.

[gatheringbones]

[“Over time, body positivity has made its constituency clear. It has widened the warm and fickle embrace of beauty standards ever so slightly. Now it showers its affections not only on beautiful, able-bodied, fair-skinned women under a size 4 but on beautiful, able-bodied, fair-skinned women under a size 12. Body positivity has widened the circle of acceptable bodies, yes, but it still leaves so many of us by the wayside. Its rallying cry, love your body, presumes that our greatest challenges are internal, a poisoned kind of thought about our own bodies. It cannot adapt to those of us who love our bodies, but whose bodies are rejected by those around us, used as grounds for ejecting us from employment, healthcare, and other areas of life.

Overwhelmingly, the popularization of body positivity has reinforced the exclusion that fat people experience everywhere else. It doesn’t make thin people less afraid of saying “fat” or being fat. While body positivity held the promise of advocating for all of us, it refused to name our bodies. It could not push for meaningful distinctions between thin bodies and fat bodies, nor the social realities that come with each. When we are not pushed to see our bodies as they are seen by those around us, we cannot have real conversations about the distinct challenges our bodies carry with them, much less how to remedy those challenges. When we are not pushed to see our bodies as they are, we are all left to our default perception—the deep, enduring belief that each of us is unforgivably fat. Diet culture hinges on all of us seeking to become thin, thinner, thinnest, engaged in an endless quest to shrink ourselves at all costs. When we are left to our own devices, we retreat to focusing on the problem of our own mindsets rather than the problem of our internalized biases, the harms we (often unintentionally) cause to those around us, and the ways in which others’ bodies invite different experiences than our own. We universalize our own experience, assuming that believing we are too fat is the same as being treated with the discrimination that too readily plagues undeniably fat people.

Thin people especially struggle to say “fat,” the hypothetical that has hurt them so deeply. But as an undeniably fat person, the word isn’t hurtful to me. It cannot be, because I do not have the luxury of escaping it. Instead, I am beholden to someone else’s discomfort with a word that has never accurately described them. Even as a very fat person, when I enter body positive spaces, I cannot be trusted to describe myself as fat, and I cannot expect support when the truth of my body is hurled at me as an insult. I cannot be responsible for naming my own skin. Body positivity quarantines the words used to describe bodies like mine and, in the process, shuts out those bodies themselves. We need the courage to say the word “fat” and the wherewithal to see all of our bodies accurately. Without it, we cannot name our bodies, nor can we truly embrace and understand all of us who have sought out this movement that felt so essential.”]

aubrey gordon, what we don’t talk about when we talk about fat

[funnywormz]

whats ur opinion on jean vicquemare? like. his relationship w harry n whatnot

ohhh jean is such a fascinating and complex character........ likewise with his relationship with harry. i am gonna put my thoughts under the cut so i don't annoy anyone too much with a long rant lol

i think jean, much like many other characters in disco elysium, is a shitty person but not without good intentions. he's got a pretty abrasive and callous personality at times, and we do get hints that he's harmed and mistreated people through his role at the rcm. but regardless of that, he's still a deeply fascinating character. in himself, he can be relatable and pitiable and unintentionally hilarious to me at times. but a lot of my interest in him comes from his dynamic with harry.

to me ive always interpreted his relationship with harry as a platonic but nonetheless deeply close and codependent one, at least before martinaise......... i think that maybe jean once looked up to harry, and even when he realises what harry is actually like, he still admires his can-opening abilities and tenacity. over the years they would have had to have a deep understanding of one another to solve so many cases together. jean does seem to genuinely care abt harry.

jean has clearly grown burnt out and tired with dealing with harry over all of these years. but i also think that at least harry's dumpster fire of a life/personality was something that was familiar to him, something he understood. throughout the game, the player has the potential to make harry "better", to lead him to choices which are better for himself and others.

it's clear that jean believes harry's behaviour in-game is a passing phase/completely fake, which is interesting. obviously it's probably a logical inference based on things he's seen harry do before, he knows that harry will go through phases of trying to get better only to crash and burn, and he knows that harry is capable of being manipulative. but i think it's also a form of wishful thinking.

a drunk, unhinged harrier is something jean knows very well, and it's the "version" of harry that he's always seen. this "new" harry, while still being the same person, is also very different. he doesn't recognise jean, he doesn't laugh at his jokes, he doesn't react as intended to jean's insults or jabs at him. he's also doing better (although this depends on how you play the game ofc).

i can't help but wonder how that makes jean feel. probably a bit left behind. harry gets to completely shed his old life, to move on and become something better, while jean is stuck dealing with all of the bullshit and emotional baggage the old harry left him with. i doubt that it feels very fair from his perspective. it probably feels like harry ditched him, left him holding the bag and bounced.

i also think that there's an aspect of mourning to their relationship now. the old harry was shitty, sure, but he was jean's friend and they understood each other very deeply. now that harry is just. gone. he's basically dead. but also harry is still there right in front of him, and he's different now, he's better, and yet jean can't help but miss the old harry, feel like he lost him. he's mourning someone who's still alive. someone who's right there in front of him. the old harry, and all of their memories together, are gone forever, and yet he can't rlly process it properly because harry is still there. fucked up.

those are basically my thoughts abt their relationship. i think it was deeply unhealthy for both of them and it's probably better for jean's mental health to have a less toxically codependent friendship with harry. but nonetheless there was a strong friendship there which is gone now........... sorry these thoughts aren't very well collected or articulated lol i hope you enjoyed reading them anyways

[ragingbookdragon]

It's Who We Are Underneath That Defines Us

Kyle Rayner x Batsis One-Shot

Word Count: 1.9K Warnings: Explicit Language, Slight Angst

Author's Note: Really gotta make the story where the Batfamily learns she and GL are dating. Enjoy! -Thorne

**********************************************************************

“Hey babe?”

She hummed absentmindedly, her eyes still trained to the stars above. “Yeah, Kyle?” Fingers twitched against her palm, then laced with her own; a heartbeat pounded against her skin, like a pulsing speaker, causing her to look over at him. “Is everything alright?”

Evergreen eyes met hers and he murmured, “Do you ever think about what life would be like if you weren’t a superhero?”

She blinked, the question giving her a slight pause. Leaning closer, she propped her chin in his shoulder and teased, “Thinking about how you could’ve had an apple pie and picket fence life, Kyle?”

A grin crossed his lips and he glanced over at her. “To be honest with you, (Y/N), I’m more of a cherry pie kinda man.” His gaze dropped, and his eyes roamed her body. “Blame Warrant on that one.” She rolled her eyes, but the laugh she gave him showed her amusement. Kyle paused, his gaze searching her face. “But back to my original question...what do you think you’d be doing if you weren’t a vigilante?”

(Y/N) inhaled deeply, rolling away from his shoulder and laid on her back, her eyes scanning the immense field of stars above them. “I don’t know, honestly. I’ve never really given it much thought.” Raising her hand, she traced the scars across her expanse of her arm with her eyes. “I’ve been training to be a vigilante since I was ten years old...helping people is all I’ve ever really wanted to do with life.”

She looked back over at him. “But since you asked, if I wasn’t a vigilante, I’d probably be a stuck-up rich bitch who overcharges her dad’s credit cards and throws hissy fits when she gets told no.” Kyle snorted, and she giggled.

After a moment of silence, he looked to her and asked, “Would you ever change anything you’ve done?”

The question he’d given her had been one she’s asked herself so many times. What if’s rising to the tongue of a girl too afraid to choose a path other than that of the least resistance, but ultimately keeping them contained and taking the hardest ones anyway. (Y/N) bit her lip slightly, the memories of every mistake, every wrong choice, flashing behind her eyes like lightning in a storm. The fingers laced though hers squeezed gently, dragging her from them, and she glanced back over, her eyes tracing the wisps of hair at his temples that had fallen from the gel he’d put in it earlier.

She blinked, then gave him a smile, her voice soft as she replied, “No...I don’t think I would change a single thing.”

Kyle’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion and he questioned, “Why not? Hasn’t there been a time where you’ve screwed up monumentally and couldn’t change it?”

(Y/N) watched him carefully, the words toying with the tip of her tongue as she asked calmly, “Are you talking about what happened to Alex?”

His face momentarily darkened, a mixture of anger, hate, and self-loathing, then it fell, and she saw the pain and regret in his eyes and heard it in his voice as he muttered, “I’m talking about everything that I’ve done wrong.” He sat up, resting his elbows on his knees, the heel of his tennis shoes scraping against the brick of the roof. He let out a heavy sigh, causing her heart to tighten, and she rose beside him, curling her arm through his.

They stared at the city across the water, then she murmured, “When I was sixteen, I accidentally shoved someone over a support beam during a fight.” He eyed her, silently wondering what had happened and just what the hell this had to do with his issues. “Didn't mean to, of course. But he grabbed me from behind, and I did what I'd been trained to do—react. I freed myself and made the distance between us. But I misjudged the force of my kick and he tumbled over and down about a hundred feet onto concrete.”

She paused, thumb rubbing the back of his hand. “When my family and friends saw what I’d done, even if it were an accident, a lot of them decided to keep me at an arm's length. ‘She might kill again’, they said, ‘If she’s killed once, she’ll do it again...there’s no way we can trust her anymore.’ Eventually, I stopped patrolling with the Titans and Teen Titans. Hell, I even stopped helping the Justice League. I did my own thing by myself because no one trusted me anymore. ‘Til this day, there are some people within the superhero community who shun me and don’t trust me. And at every meeting, somehow, someway, it's always brought up.”

(Y/N) looked over at him, squeezing his hand again. “Wherever I go, whatever I do, that follows me. It’s never going to be let go, and it’s certainly never going to be forgotten. However, despite those problems and feelings, and what occurred in the past, that accident doesn't define meor my actions. Yes, I unintentionally took someone’s life, but I’m not a murderer. I carry that burden with me, and I always will and while I can't change what happened, it drives me to make sure that I don't make the same mistake again.”

She let go of his hand, slipping her legs on either side of his body, her hands coming up to cup his cheeks; she caressed his cheekbones with her thumbs, staring into his eyes, and mustered the sincerest voice she could. “Kyle, what you’ve gone through, the people you’ve lost, the people you’ve saved, and the friends you’ve gathered along the way? That’s not who you are...it’s what you do with it that defines who you are.” His eyes widened slightly, and his lips parted to speak, but no words fell from them.

(Y/N) gave him a warm smile and leaned forward, pressing her lips against his forehead; she pulled back and murmured, “It may not mean much, but I'm proud of you, Kyle. You make me proud every single day.” She watched him exhale shakily, and she swore she could see the damn inside him breaking as he lowered his head, his arms reaching to pull her against him.

She shifted, perching in his lap, and let him bury his face in her neck. Kyle let out a breath, but it felt more like a soft sob, and heat blossomed against her skin where his lips touched.

He let out a sound, crossing between a groan and grunt as he told her, “I love you, (Y/N).”

She hummed, wrapping her arms around his neck, her lips brushing his temple. “I love you too, Kyle.”

They stayed that way for a few minutes, simply holding the other. Providing the anchors needed to keep their spirits alive. Eventually, (Y/N) pulled back and dragged his face away from her neck, huffing a laugh when he whined lowly from the loss of contact.

She reached up and wiped his face. “You look like a kid who was told no to ice-cream before dinner.”

Kyle let out a chuckle, moving her hands away and rubbing at his face vigorously. She climbed out of his lap and sat beside him once more, and he looked over at her wondering, “How do you manage to stay so positive outside the mask? To be the same person in costume and out?”

(Y/N) went silent, thinking for a moment, then she said, “A few years ago, I asked my dad the same thing, and he told me, ‘It doesn't matter who we are underneath the costume or out in the real world...it’s what we do in or out that defines us. If the person you claim to be isn’t the same person inside and outside of uniform, you don’t need to be wearing it.’” She glanced back over at him, nudging him in the ribs. “Don't worry about it though, you’re still a dork inside and out of G.L.”

Kyle let out an amused scoff, placing a hand against his chest. “I can't believe you would insult your boyfriend like that. A dork? I’m hurt.”

(Y/N) rolled her eyes, looking back at the city. “Kyle, you doodle in the middle of J.L. meetings, and it’s usually caricatures of my dad strangling Hal, the Joker, Jason, or Dick…typically it depends on what’s going on during the meetings and who’s been a pain in his ass for it.”

He opened his mouth to retort, but shut it, then raised a pointer finger at her. “Alright, you have me there.”

(Y/N) looked over at him, raising an eyebrow. “Of course I have you there, Dork Lantern...” She gave him a grin, wiggling her eyebrows and quipped, “I sit and doodle with you.” The two of them laughed, and she rested her head on his shoulder, letting out a sigh. “I could stay with you here forever.”

Kyle nodded, wrapping an arm around her waist. “Me too.”

A moment of silence passed them, and as they were enjoying it, a voice called out, “Oi! Kyle! Queenie! Are you guys up there!”

She let out a groan, rubbing the bridge of her nose. “So help me God, I can’t enjoy anything without dumb and dumber sticking their noses into it.”

Kyle looked over at her, his eyebrows furrowing as he pointed out, “But there’s only one?”

(Y/N) raised a hand in a ‘wait’ motion, then she waved it and, “Of course they’re up there Little-wing. The roof is where all the teens go to make out.”

Her eye twitched, and she leaned over the ledge, shouting, “The only person who’s made out on the roof is you, Dick. And it was with Kori after you guys broke up...AGAIN.”

A scoff sounded below followed by, “Hit me where it hurts why don't you!” She rolled her eyes, huffing, then he asked, “Is Kyle up there with you?”

“And what’s it to you?”

“Just wanted to make sure you guys are acting appropriate.”

“Dick...I am older than you. Kyle and I are both older than you.”

“So?”

(Y/N) turned to Kyle and mouthed, ‘Wanna get out of here?’ He flashed her a grin, then a strike of green blinded her, and he stood before her in his Green Lantern suit. He held out his hand. A beam of green light surrounded them, and a moment later, (Y/N) felt herself drop into a seat. She looked around, a grin appearing on her lips as she ran her hand along the dash of the constructed car.

“Kyle, are you trying to woo me with my love of nice cars?”

He matched her grin, laying his unoccupied arm across the seats. “I don't know...is it working?”

She nodded, sliding over into his side. “Yes. It is.” He chuckled, and they started moving, leaving her two brothers yelling for them.

“Kyle! Are you letting (Y/N) ride in the Green Machine?! You never let me do that!”

“(Y/N)’s my girlfriend, Jason!”

“I’M YOUR FUCKING BEST FRIEND! WHAT EVEN!”

She leaned across Kyle, glaring at Dick and Jason. “Go do something productive with your time, losers.”

“I am hurt, Jellybean! I thought you loved me!”

“Only when I can get something out of it!” (Y/N) glanced at Kyle and grinned. “Hit the gas G.L. Don't let ‘em catch the taillights.” He smirked, and they waved as they left Wayne Manor behind them.

[eccedentesian]

i would like to read children of bottle again && i know i could just pick up my ipad && read the ebook that i bought with my hard earned money but i have the physical copy that i bought with ~8 times the hard earned money && i prefer to read physical books but it's at my apartment && i am out of town && i might be silly && have my roommate mail it to me even though that'll also cost me money because i want to hold my fav b.accano book in my hands </3

anyway i just think elmer was insane for saying "you guys should make that hope of yours come true and learn about happiness… i'll teach you. i'll show you, all right? i'll teach you, i swear, no matter how many years it takes…" cuz like wtf. WHAT THE FUCK !!!!

also, on the same page, just a few lines before:

"in this world, see, lots of people die never even knowing the word hope. maybe their parents are dead the moment they’re born, or they’re starving and there’s not a drop of water in sight, or maybe they were born just to be killed… but you know about hope. denying that is an insult to your life."

lot to unpack in that paragraph && i've already picked it to pieces before but... those last two sentences are so real, first of all, but "or maybe they were born just to be killed" CAN HE STOP DROPPING PERSONAL BACKSTORY SO CASUALLY I WANT TO THROW UP SO BAD. also he says this:

"don't say sad things like that. i'm the one who gets sad, but, anyway." STOP!!!!! STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!

it's the way he is utterly and entirely emotionally numb. he is incapable of feeling anything. if sad is your default state, if you never know the feeling of anything but despair, isn't that just the same as feeling nothing? that's the reality elmer lives every day && it makes me sick.

plus, because it's worth talking about again, this is one of three traits about elmer that are so deeply ingrained in huey's memory that he (probably half-unintentionally) made a homunculus with them. rail is: a) covered in scars across their whole body b) permanently smiling dude to sutures stretching their face c) incapable of feeling physical pain. now, we know that 99% of huey's homunculi are blonde women because he's obsessed with bringing back his dead wife, but to turn one of them into dollar store elmer && then to have them absolutely despite huey && everything he stands for... i can't imagine what that's like for him. lol

[unhealthyfanobsession]

I teased this in a previous post and people asked me to expand so...here’s my controversial take that Rhysand and Nesta are actually parallel characters in many ways and that they both hate each other so much because they ultimately hate themselves.

Alright ladies and gentleman, anti’s and stans, buckle your fucking seatbelts or hope off the roller coaster here because I’m about to learn you a thing or two about the most divisive characters in the ACOTAR world. 

Starting out very broadly- both characters are introduced as sort of confusing villains (Rhys is “evil” but he’s also helping Feyre. Nesta is an “awful sister”, but she also is protective of Elain and tells Feyre essentially to go and be happy), both have faced significant trauma and grapple with self-loathing and feelings of not being good enough, and both ultimately find redemption and healing with their mates who love them. They also both currently exist in a strange parallel coming out of ACOSF where Rhys is supposedly “chosen by the Cauldron” and Nesta is “blessed by the Mother”- the two sacred entities of Prythian.

Intrigued? More specifics and text analysis under the cut

Mommy (and Daddy) Issues:

Both characters were basically raised by their mother’s alone and then lost them at a young age and that had a deep impact on them. Rhysand had a far more positive experience of being raised by his mother HOWEVER I would argue that it was still “grooming” of a type since she took him away to train in Illyria specifically so that he wouldn’t be influenced by his father.

Rhys’ mother did this out of love and Nesta’s mother groomed her out of a social climbing agenda, but it had the same effect- they both lost the parent who was their primary caregiver at a young age and they were both not close with their father’s because of their mother’s actions  (again this was a good thing for Rhys, not as much for Nesta).

Parents Death: Rhys and Nesta both blame themselves for one of their parent’s death and are deeply affected by feeling like they failed someone important to them.

Rhys thinks that he is responsible for his mother and sister’s death because he gave Tamlin info

Rhys even says after this “It should have been me.”

Nesta feels that she was unable to save her father and she hates herself for it.

Rocky sibling relationship and Separation:

Rhysand and Cassian are obviously a lot further along in their sibling journey, but it’s stated that he and Cassian HATED each other and fought constantly essentially until Azriel arrived and then they decided to be “allies”.

Nesta and Feyre are also at each others throats but seem to put their differences aside in order to not upset Elain. (Even when Feyre first goes back to the human lands Nesta says NOPE NO FAE! But as soon as Elain asks her to do as Feyre says she agrees) and then Nesta states in ACOSF that she and Feyre were brought together by Elain to be allies in the war.

Rhysand and Cassian obviously grew into true brothers despite their adversarial, insulting, bitter beginning... and Nesta and Feyre after ACOSF have done the same. Obviously there’s still a lot of work to be done in that relationship, but the parallel stands (and is just strengthened by the fact that in both cases it’s the character with more power in the relationship- Nesta for being the oldest and Rhys for being the one whose family took Cassian in is then mated to the opposite sibling!)

Both have a parent who essentially separated them from their ‘siblings’ for their own benefit. Nesta’s mom isolated her as a child so that she could groom her and tell her how to maneuver her sisters when the time was right while Rhys’ father- afraid of his, Cassian, and Azriel’s combined power- separated them for 7 years through the first war to ensure they wouldn’t ally against him. Nesta was also separated from Feyre by Tamlin and tried to go to the wall to get her back but couldn’t get through- which is very reminiscent to me of the scene at the beginning of ACOWAR from the first war where Rhys is searching desperately but without hope for Cassian.

Shared Trauma and Learning to be “Evil” to protect their family:

both characters are sexual assault survivors who spend a chunk of their book (I’m counting ACOMAF as essentially Rhys’ book since that’s when we learn more about him as a character) grappling with that, coming to terms with it, and moving forward with a general attitude of “Never Again.” I would also argue that even their abusers are parallels as Rhysand was only ‘with’ Amarantha because he was trying to protect his family and Nesta was only ‘with’ Tomas because she thought his family might be able to take in and feed Elain (she says in ACOSF that she would give him whatever he wanted- her body meant nothing to her and Elain meant everything, which is essentially Rhys’ UTM mindset). In addition, both characters are able to escape their abusers out of love for Feyre. Rhys does so when Amarantha is about to kill Feyre, and Nesta does so because she realizes that Tomas would never go to the wall with her to save Feyre.

 Beyond this, both characters express that it is the lack of control over their own lives that truly haunts them. Rhys when he felt like he had no choice but to be Amarantha’s puppet and Nesta with a lot of her life, but especially when she is forced into the cauldron. Both of these are things that make them feel like failures for not protecting others. Rhys is haunted that he couldn’t protect Feyre under the mountain and Nesta is haunted that she couldn’t protect Elain from the cauldron.

This leads both characters to have a terrifying power-surge nightmare brought on by their trauma (Rhys from Amarantha; Nesta from the Cauldron) that terrifies those around them and can only be stopped by their mate.

In addition to this, they both have a “persona” that they put on and sometimes feel like they can’t shake off, a face that they made to protect themselves and their family. Rhys with his “Court of Nightmares” persona that he uses UTM, in the Hewn City, and with the other High Lords until the war. Part of his growth is letting people see beyond that ‘most powerful high lord of darkness’ mask.

For Nesta this is expressed by her “wolves” that she uses to put up a wall between her and the people who mocked her and her family, and especially Elain. And her learning to open up with Cassian and her found family was really important for her growth

HOWEVER, they both also keep that persona. Rhys has his mask polished for when anyone might threaten the people he loves and so does Nesta. Neither of them truly gave up that side of themselves, the darkness, they simply learned to stop it from consuming them. 

They also both LIKE doing this to their enemies. Rhys likes to toy with his enemies and torture those who would harm his family or betray him and so does Nesta- she revels in cutting down anyone who insults Elain and says in ACOSF that she’s felt the urge to do the same for Cassian. They both wield words like weapons and use their intelligence to ensure they are always one quip ahead of their enemies. Something that both Feyre and Cassian admire in their mates and try to emulate to a degree.

(Bonus points for the fact that in both cases their families did not ASK to be protected/sacrificed for.)

Found family and sacrifice:

Rhys calls Cassian and Azriel his “brothers” after becoming close while training and they conquer the blood rite together. Nesta calls Emerie and Gwyn her “sisters” after becoming close while training and they conquer the blood rite together. Rhys sacrifices himself to Amarantha in order to protect Cassian and Azriel (and Velaris). Nesta sacrifices herself to hold the path of Enalius to protect Emerie and Gwyn. There’s also a line in ACOMAF and a parallel line in ACOSF essentially about Nesta being willing to do anything- including “whore” herself- to protect Elain, and in order to protect his brother’s that’s exactly what Rhys did- “whore” himself to Amarantha.

Both are ‘saved by’ and feel not good enough for their mate:

I hesitate to use the word “saved by” because ultimately both characters have more agency than that, HOWEVER, both characters rely on their mate to a degree to pull them out of a very dark time and place. Feyre helps Rhys remember who he is and forgive himself for under the mountain and he even specifically calls her his “salvation.”

I don’t think I need to even say the Nesta part here, all of ACOSF is essentially Cassian helping Nesta climb out of a dark period so that they can heal together.

(Both also start connecting with their mates on a “just sex” situation.)

Both characters think that because of the things they’ve done and the darkness inside of them that they don’t deserve the people they have been mated to.

Obviously there are many differences, but the characters are similar in a lot of ways and what I think this really highlights is just how true that line is in ACOSF about Nesta being a wolf that was never allowed to learn how to be a wolf. Meanwhile Rhys is 500 years older and has always had power and agency of some kind even at his lowest point. Nesta didn’t have that power and wasn’t allowed to really unleash herself so she armed herself with a steel exterior to make up for that lack of power and control. Which is very similar to what Rhysand did when he felt he didn’t have power under the mountain- put on a cold face, not let anyone in, and act cruel in order to get through it.

Overall it’s an interesting character study because in a lot of ways these are very similar characters, but there is such a MASSIVE divide among the fandom of liking and hating one or both of them. Ultimately, I do think that a lot of the hate Nesta gets is because she’s a woman and female characters simply aren’t allowed to have the same flaws as male ones- which is kind of Nesta’s whole life story. BUT I think that Rhysand actually gets unintentionally screwed over by the narrative in one big way. Becuase my final paralell is that I think a lot of people came around on Nesta when they saw in her perspective that she knows she has problems and how much she was struggling… and I also think that Rhysand is so hated by those who dislike him because of Feyre’s ‘he can do no wrong’ perspective. I think if we saw more of Rhysand internally struggling and knowing that he made the wrong call sometimes and second guessing himself he’d be a lot more likeable character. We know he’s capable of this because when Cassian calls him out on the training roof for always thinking the worst of Nesta he just says “you’re right. I’m sorry” and he even *kinda* admits some wrong when he’s so shocked by how deep Nesta’s trauma is. Feyre and the rest of the IC constantly exalting Rhys as perfect when he so clearly isn’t and in fact has a lot of the same “flaws” as Nesta is probably the most frustrating thing about the character, which ultimately I think is kind of unfair because we know from his few perspectives that he doesn’t see himself that way.

[hanatiny]

Perfect Illusion

a/n: this fic is inspired by this post (although I modified the idea a bit)! for those interested, I even made a spotify playlist to hopefully enhance the experience~

pairing: royal guard!San x royal guard/spy!f!reader

genre: smut

word count: 2113

warnings: royal AU, weapons (knives and daggers), brief mention of infidelity (which I do not condone), swearing, teasing, dry humping, hair pulling, name-calling (they keep insulting each other... oops), enemies with benefits, implied enemies to lovers (kind of), slight knife kink, implied pain kink, exhibitionism, unprotected sex, no clear dom/sub roles

-----

Despite excelling at undercover work, you weren’t known be incredibly ‘out there’ in the way you executed your tasks, so this particular mission you had been given must have been the one you disliked the most as of now, not to mention that you despised the tactic of seduction.

You did your best to attract as little attention as possible in order to carry out your information gathering in peace. Although it seemed that in doing so, you had become a little too suspicious for one of the guards. You heaved a sigh, meeting his eyes while most of his face remained covered by the hood and the mask he wore to not look like the odd one out at the royal masquerade event. He nudged his head towards a nearby balcony after asking for one of his fellow guards to watch his spot, signalling you to follow.

Albeit slowly, you did what was asked of you - your beliefs were much too deeply rooted in obedience not to. Once outside, the guard closed and locked the door behind you. Shrugging off his hood, he took off his mask while you did the same so the two of you were equally bare to each other.

“San?!” “Y/n?!” You both gasped aloud in equal shock and surprise, slapping a hand over each other’s mouths to prevent anyone from hearing how casually you spoke with each other.

Prying your hand away from his face, although still holding it in his own, San quirked an inquisitive eyebrow at you, “What, pray tell, are you doing here at this party wearing that?”

Your voice was teasing as you spoke and he gestured towards the black dress you were wearing, “Oh, this old thing~?” He rolled his eyes at your playful tone but allowed you to continue, “As much as I didn’t want to, His Highness requested me to keep my eyes and ears open for anything or anyone suspicious... and had the bright idea of having me use seduction to get the job done.”

Despite knowing how much you hated the technique in question, San thought it fun to tease and rile you up about it, “Do I classify as suspicious then? Cause you’ve definitely caught my interest and seduced me...~”

You rolled your eyes, grabbing him and pulling him close by the tie he was wearing before whispering in his ear, “With how flirty you’re being, definitely. I might have to arrest you now, sunshine~ But if you play your cards right, I might let you fuck me, pretty boy.”

It was your turn to cock an eyebrow when San nonchalantly turned the situation around on you and pinned you against the wall roughly, both of your wrists above your head in one of his own while an almost bored grin danced across on your face at the act. “That all you got~?”

“Not at all, sweetheart...~” “Show me then,” you challenged without hesitation, hooking one of your legs around his hip to draw his body closer and flush against yours, “show me what you can do, unless you want to admit that a woman could dom you~”

Bullseye. You hit him right in his sore spot, knowing him to be much too competitive to let such a cheeky comment slide. You saw something shift in his eyes, something dark, and you knew you had him right then and there, “You asked for it... don’t complain if you limp afterwards.”

“Wanna bet~?” San effectively shut you up by melding his plush lips to yours, your hands tugging greedily at his already messy hair while the grinding of your hips against his coaxed a soft moan from his lips.

“You really don’t intend to make it easy for me do you, little vixen...” He whispered against your lips, his voice low and raspy as he did so, causing you to give him a casual shrug, “You know me, I always want to be the one who comes out on top. Whether that is in the physical sense or not couldn’t matter any less to me, frankly.”

San huffed softly, he knew you were competitive but so was here. However, the difference between the two of you was that you were willing to play dirty to get what you want.

As such, you couldn’t prevent a slight smirk from tugging at your lips when his breath hitched audibly after he pushed the hem of your dress up to your hips and spotted the daggers strapped to one of your thighs. “Staring longer won’t make the image imprint itself in your mind any faster. And in case you haven’t noticed with how much you want my daggers on your body, I’m worked up and hereby telling you to hurry up and fuck me. Right here, right now.”

“Getting feisty and demanding, are we? Two can play that game, Y/n...~” Reaching into the inside of his jacket, San pulled out a knife and held it to your throat while the cocky smirk never left your face, “Are you just gonna keep threatening me with a good time so that I’ll walk right back in there and tell everyone you’re my bitch, or are you actually gonna do something about that obvious boner in your pants?”

San’s eyebrow twitched at your audacity, the discovery of the fact that you had foregone underwear tonight not helping his dwindling patience in the slightest, “Pathetic how desperate you are for my cock, you minx. Needing to cover it up with such a tough girl act...”

He trailed off, watching you closely as he pocketed his knife and used his now unoccupied hand to quickly unfasten his pants and free his aching length from its confines. He stroked himself a few times, the seconds passing torturously slowly in your eyes as you licked your lips in anticipation before throwing your head back against the wall with a strangled gasp when he fully inserted himself inside of you without warning.

“You son of a-” “Shush doll, don’t want anyone to hear what we’re doing out here do you~?” You huffed as he interrupted you, pretending to think for a moment before shaking your head with a smile, “I actually do, imagine the surprise when they’d hear that two of the royal guards are all over each other...~”

San’s eyes darkened once more before narrowing them at you, “You asked for it, then... Be prepared to scream.”

“Such big words from the man who’d let me spit in his mouth~” You weren’t having it though, only mewling and moaning softly while San repeatedly snapped his hips into yours. His pace was rough and quick, eager to get both you and himself off, “Won’t even, fuck- won’t even scream for me... am I not fucking you hard enough?”

“Mmh... nope~!” You replied with a toothy grin, gasping sharply when San thrusted inside of you particularly harshly. “That better?” “Much~” He continued to move at the harsh pace he had just set, his breath hitching when his hand accidentally brushed against the leather garter still fixed securely around your thigh.

He felt himself twitch violently when you spoke through low pants, his thrusts stuttering, “Wouldn’t you love to have me trail one of those daggers over your sensitive skin, sunshine? Perhaps even pierce it a little here and there to show who you belong to~?”

Those last words came out unintentionally but you didn’t feel the need to correct yourself, considering that your possessiveness appeared to be the last straw for San judging by the warmth that filled you as he came, your own orgasm washing over you shortly after. Once you had both caught your breath, he carefully pulled out of you and helped you straighten out your dress after doing the same to his own clothes.

You implying that he was yours was undoubtedly a matter to be discussed, but for now, you two had a masquerade to return to. As such, San handed your mask back to you after having previously stored it in one of his jacket pockets. You both secured your masks back on your faces so that your identities were concealed once more, although San decided to not pull his hood back up.

He unlocked the balcony door before turning to you with a teasing albeit charming smile, holding his hand out for you to take, “Will you let me have this dance, m’lady~?”

You found it amusing how quickly he could switch back to his professional persona, placing your hand in his own regardless, “It’d be my pleasure~”

He led you back inside of the large, well-lit ballroom where no one was any the wiser of what had transpired mere minutes ago, your dress swaying slightly while you danced with San, a small grin painted on your features.

You ended up getting to bed incredibly late, almost stumbling out of it the next morning before quickly making yourself presentable after being requested in the throne room by His Highness himself, wondering what it could possibly be about.

You ran into San on the way there, finding out that he had been called to see the prince as well. Pushing the heavy wooden door open, you weren’t particularly surprised to find it empty besides the presences of you, your companion and Yeosang, who had placed his crown on a pedestal near himself.

Letting his emotionless facade crack a bit, he gave a small smile when he saw the two of you kneel before him as it was custom for the subordinates or the royal family.

“Those who want to wear the crown need to prove they are able to bear its weight.”

Yeosang’s voice rang out through the room, causing you and San to look at each other questioningly and then back up at him in confusion. The older male had never been more glad to not have any other of his court officials or guards besides the two of you inside of his throne room, relieved that he could be blunt about his message.

“I’m sure you both are aware of how I came to be where I am presently, yes?” You both nodded in response. “Then you know my mother was not a true queen and slept her way to the throne. Hell, I’m even a bastard child - her husband was not my father. In short... she was a whore.”

San gasped quietly next to you in surprise at the word choice, causing you to nudge him gently to remind him to focus and listen.

“I don’t want to keep the two of you here any longer than necessary,” the unrightful prince leaned forward, his weight still resting on the arm he had previously propped himself up on, “My coronation is set to be held eleven days from now. Whichever of you comes up with the better plan to cover up my ‘coincidental’ disappearance by then gets to claim the throne.”

It was a tempting offer, that much you had to admit, but it sounded almost too good to actually be true.

“Your Highness-” “Please drop the formalities Y/n, you’ve known me since I was a little child.” The young man in question corrected softly as you cleared your throat with an understanding nod, “Are you sure this will work out as you intend it to? I’m not sure anyone would believe one of your royal guards to be allowed to inherit the crown just like that...”

“Y/n. Surely you’ve noticed how desperate the people are for a ruler who stands with them, even with all the time you spend working? They’ll accept just about anyone. As long as neither of you exposes the truth about any part of my family... do we have a deal?”

San looked at you and met your eyes, lingering for a few beats before getting up from his knees with you following suit as you looked up at the prince and spoke in unison, always up for a challenge - especially if it just so happened to come with a high reward like this one did, “We have a deal.”

“That’s what I like to hear. Now off you two go, there is work to be done~” Yeosang hummed, you and your ‘companion’ bowing respectfully and nodding before turning on your respective heels.

San pulled his hood back over his head and glanced at you with a smug grin that you happily mirrored, both of you making a run for it out of the throne room.

After all, it was only a matter of time and of who created the most perfect illusion, aware that only one of you would come out on top.

----- Taglist (tell me if you wanna be added):

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[itsimaginetime]

i can tell that the anon was annoying bc even made myself mad, but seeing you mocking them about the grammar kinda hurt me. please, took in consideration that a lot of your readers are not natural english speakers and we try our best for having a decent communication.

not telling it is your case, but a lot of english speakers always tell hurtful things about the way we talk/spell but can't even tell a word in other language that isn't english. i really enjoy reading you, and as a not fluent person who makes mistakes, i felt like telling you this because what you said to them can hurt others too as much as did to me. have a good day, and take care of yourself <3

Hello there , I completely understand where you're coming from because English isn't my first language even if it seems like it, it's actually my third language.

The grammar thing was only a jab at the end since that person truly needed someone to roast them. I personally didn't take that insult to heart , I couldn't care any less , however I roasted them as hard as I did to hopefully make sure they never do that to someone who that insult might hurt deeply.

I believe if someone is going to insult me , the least they can do is write the words "you" and "ass" correctly, the least they can do is do their research how a sentence is written even if they're not fluent cause if they have the time and energy to come up with an undeserved insult , they can use that same time and energy to do research, ask , and make sure that at least it's written correctly.

Maybe it's because where I come from (we don't speak English where I come from) , if someone insults you and they make a pronunciation mistake or spelling mistake, you dismiss them and roast their mistakes. So I guess it could be just my cultural upbringing shinning through.

But other than someone trying to insult me , I have absolutely no issue with someone making mistakes. I genuinely encourage people to write and make mistakes cause that's how one learns, but if someone tries to insult me , I will rip into them without a doubt , I feel it's only fair.

Anyway, moral of the story, if someone insults me for no reason, I will completely rip them apart so they can have a taste of their own medicine, however, I'll try to refrain from any comments about grammar even if it's ingrained in me when ripping into them and I'm sorry for unintentionally hurting you and sorry to anybody else who was effected.

Have a good day and take care of yourself as well! 💖💖💖

[assassinscreed-photomode]

You know what Ravensthorpe friendship has serious potential that I never see talked about? Hytham and Randvi!

Hytham and Randvi is a broship that has serious potential. Both stuck in Ravensthorpe all the time. Both were brought into that community. Both spend all day pouring over scrolls and maps and letters and all that administrative stuff that needs to get done but is overlooked by most people. It has the potential to be a brilliant mlm/wlw friendship. Randvi with her confident personality and Hytham being shyer could make for great interactions.

Just imagine them co working together, either in the bureau or in the war table office. Either silently working in unison or Randvi in exasperation venting to Hytham about maps, and correspondence and keeping track of all the alliances and not getting enough credit. Randvi getting Hytham to open up about his likes and dislikes and asking him blunt and embarrassing questions. Them really bonding about the circumstances that lead to neither of them getting to leave the town very often. Randvi occasionally just brings an entire bottle of wine and they just drink it, work abandoned.

Then both of them find solace in each other when Sigurd returns distant and different and cold towards Randvi, and at the same time Basim leaves for longer and longer amounts of time and tells Hytham less and less. Both feeling confused and lost.

I imagine not everyone in Ravensthorpe is fully aware of the nature of Hythams work or the presence of the order in England. It is kept mostly within the inner circle.

So as Sigurd and Eivor and Basim are off getting more and more deeply entwined with the Order, there’s not too many people in RT that Hytham or Randvi can share their worries with except each other. At first they just spoke to each other because there weren't that many other options but soon a surprisingly strong bond grew. Randvi didn't really spend any time with Hytham and Basim at first, thinking they were distant and strange and even after coming to RT, Hytham is so shy that he would unintentionally come off as standoffish.

But as they began to speak more and more both their personalities started to come out around each other and soon they would make their co working days a regular thing. She liked to hear more about where he was from and where he had travelled and if there was anything she could do to ease his injury and how he de-codes these Order letters, and he liked to pick her brain about how she ended up marrying Sigurd and joining the clan and her fighting style and Eivor and her opinions on the different members of the town, and Eivor again.

Later down the road they both noticed each other's love-interests interest in them before they do. Randvi would ask Hytham plainly and bluntly, making him go bright red. He would ask her indirectly, making her laugh.

Randvi teasing him with her dry sense of humour and him not getting the joke until after a second. Hytham is not very good at friendly insults and dry humour but after enough time with Randvi he starts to pick up on it and snipe back, much to her joy

Randvi is a social butterfly whom everyone likes and Hytham wants to learn her secrets.

Well that was a bit long but I stand by what I said!

[sassyduckqueen]

Miraculous: Rise of Anatis 41

Sup my peeps. I hope you all had a good xmas and enjoyed your boxing day. I had a good one which is nice. Anyway, here's Chameleon. I hope you guys enjoy it :D

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Chapter Forty-One: Chameleon

Marinette ran as fast as she could to school as she held a croissant in her mouth. After another late night akuma, she had missed her third alarm and was running late for school. She rushed up the stairs and through the door, just as Fred was about to close it. Calling out an apology, she ran up the stairs as fast as she could before stopping in front of the classroom door. Taking a deep breathe, she opened it and walked in. Almost instantly, she stopped and blinked. Everyone had swapped seats. Alya was now sat next to Nino, Ivan was sat next to Mylene and Nath had moved next to Alix. Sabrina and Chloe were in the same place as were Juleka and Rose but the only empty seats were at the front next to Adrien and at the back. Marinette frowned a little as she had a feeling Alya had got people to move so she could sit next to Adrien but since finding out that Adrien and Kagami were actually a couple, she had really began to move on. She had already began to take down the pictures she had off him but over the last few weeks, she had been removing more and more of Adrien from her life. It was a slow process but gradually, sunshine yellow was been removed from her life and sea blue was finding it's way into her heart. Not that she was quite ready to admit that. Sure, she knew she definitely liked Luka but a small part of her heart was still in love with Adrien. Not just that but she didn't want to use Luka as a rebound. He deserved better then that. Holding back a sigh, she moved over to Alya and cleared her throat.

 "Hey, girl, you made it just in time," Alya grinned, causing her to smile a little.

 "Cool but what's going on?" She asked, making Alya frown a little. Marinette just thought she was insulted at the fact that she wasn't groveling at her feet. "Not that I'm not grateful for you trying to get me a seat next to Adrien but I was fine where I was,"

 "What are you talking about?" Alya asked, clearly confused before shaking her head. "Your seat's not next to Adrien. You're seats over there,"

 Marinette turned to look in the direction that Alya glanced to and frowned as she realized moved to the back. Without been told. She decided to play along as maybe they had a really good reason to put her there. After all, it wasn't a bad place to be. It meant that she could doodle without Miss Bustier noticing and send sneaky texts to Luka without been caught but somehow, she got a feeling that wasn't why Alya had done that.

 "At the back?" She questioned, acting confused. "Why? What's going on?"

 "Well, since she's got a hearing issue, there's no way that she could sit at the back of the class right? Which means she needed a place up at the front ," Nino piped in, confusing Marinette. Just who were they talking about?

 "So to make it work, Ivan sat next to Mylene, Nath sat next to Alix," Alya explained, causing Marinette to look around. Ivan was talking to Mylene and Alix was chatting to Nath. Marinette frowned a little before looking back at Alya. "Besides, she came up with the idea of moving Nino here so now we get to spend more time together,"

 "Right... but who are you talking about?" Marinette asked as Miss Bustier came in.

 "Good morning, students," She smiled, facing them. "I'm sure you've all heard right now but Lila is back from her medical leave and has returned to class,"

Marinette felt her heart drop and her blood turn to ice as Lila walked into the room. Fear gripped her and she felt like she was going to burst into tears as she stared at the girl. Lila lifted her hand and waved as she wore a false smile.

 "Hi everyone," She smiled before noticing the empty seat at the front as everyone greeted her. She gasped in pretend surprise and clutched her cheeks. "Oh, a seat in the front row! You all remembered my hearing issue. You're such sweethearts all of you,"

 She blew kisses at them in an over dramatic way, causing Marinette to feel disgusted. She knew Alya was convinced that Lila had changed her ways but Marinette knew she hadn't. She frowned deeply as she took a seat next to Adrien, who looked like he wanted to run away. She didn't blame him and there was no way she was going to let that gremlin walk all over her again. Reminding herself that she was the one and only Lady Noir, she took a deep breathe and pushed her fear away.

 "You have hearing issues, Lila?" Marinette asked in a serious tone, causing almost everyone to look at her. Since no one was looking at her, Lila narrowed her eyes.

 "Yes, I suffer from Tinnitus. A constant ringing in my left ear," She stated as Marinette cross her arms. "I've had it ever since the sound of an airplane engine burst my eardrum on the runaway when I was saving Jagged Stone's lost kitten,"

 "Jagged doesn't have a kitten," Marinette gritted as she rolled her eyes. "He has a pet crocodile,"

 "Now he does but this was before then," Lila corrected as everyone looked at her. "Of course, he had to get rid of it before he found he was allergic. The best part is since you're such an excellent student, Adrien, you'll be able to help me catch up... right?"

 She lightly traced her finger up his forearm, making him feel uncomfortable before he took a deep breathe and pushed her hand away.

 "No, I won't be able to do that, Lila," He stated, surprising her. "And would you please not touch me? I don't like it,"

 "Oh, my gosh... I am so sorry," She gasped but both Adrien and Marinette knew it was a fake apology. Not just that but her eyes were full of anger. "I didn't realize it was an issue,"

 "Speaking of issues," Marinette muttered under her breathe. "Miss Bustier, why do I have to sit at the back?"

 "Marinette, you agreed to do so," Miss Bustier stated as everyone nodded but Marinette frowned deeply.

 "No, I didn't," She stated, surprising everyone. "In fact, I had no idea this was a thing until I literally walked in here this morning,"

 "You didn't tell her?!" Ivan gasped, looking at Alya who gulped. 

 "Well... I figured she wouldn't mind..." She muttered, making a number of people gasp in horror, including Adrien, Juleka and Miss Bustier. 

 "Alya, while I understand that you were trying to help out a friend in need, you can't just assume that other people would be ok with sitting in the back without asking them first," She stated, shaking her head. Alya went to argue but Alix beat her to it.

 "Yeah! You told us Mari was cool with it and knew about it, which clearly she didn't," She stated before turning to Marinette. "I'm sorry, Mari. I had no idea she didn't tell you,"

 "It's fine, Alix," She stated before crossing her arms and glaring at Alya and Lila. "But since you moved everyone around to 'accommodate' Lila, I assume she has a doctor's note as proof of her disability,"

 "Actually, I don't need a doctor's note as it states in my student-"

 "Lila, don't lie," Marinette stated, cutting her off with an icy glare. "The rules state that you need a real doctor's note as proof so accommodations can be provided and since you haven't been here for over a month, any doctor note you have in your school file would be invalid as you would need a new, up to date one. Also, I've seen in your student file and there is nothing on any of your 'disabilities'... and before you ask, it's part of my job as class representative to make sure files are up to date. Another thing, as class representative, I have to approve any change to the seating plan and since I didn't, you can all move back to your original seats. Lila, I'm afraid that means you will be in the back until you provide an up to date doctor's note, detailing your disabilities,"

 "Oh, come on, Marinette," Alya gasped. "That's not fair. Miss Bustier, can't you overthrow Marinette's decision?"

 Marinette looked at Miss Bustier, who looked a little conflicted before she glanced over at Chloe. She took a deep breathe and shook her head.

 "No, Marinette is absolutely in the right here," She stated, turning to look at Lila. "Lila, we'll be happy to accommodate you as soon as you have proof of your disabilities... until then, you're to sit in the back. Everyone else, please return to your original seating plan. Alya, I highly recommend you include all of your class mates when you come up with a plan like this. I know you can get carried away but you unintentionally banished Marinette to the back without her consent and lied to your classmates about that. If you continue with this behavior, I'll have no choice but to give you a detention. Since this seems to be an isolated incident, I'm just giving you a warning but this is your only warning,"

 "But Miss Bustier-"

"Alya, that's enough!" Miss Bustier shouted, shocking everyone even Marinette... but she couldn't deny she was happy. Apparently, Anatis really had gotten through to her. Alya went quiet and sulked as everyone moved to their original seats. Marinette sat next to her and took out her books as Lila moved pass her. She didn't miss the nasty glare she gave her but this time, Marinette felt more confident. She was not going to go down like before. Miss Bustier began her lesson as Marinette began to take notes. Alya slid her a note, making Marinette frown as she carefully unfolded it.

 What the hell, Marinette? I thought you were all for helping people.

 Marinette let out a little sigh but wrote back.

 I am but not when they aren't truthful. If Lila really does have Tinnitus then she needs proof like everyone else. You should know this given that it's in the class representative handbook, which you should have read given that you're my  deputy

 She slid back over to her and continued taking notes until Alya send her over another.

 Can't you just give her the benefit of a doubt? She's got a disability

 Marinette frowned deeply as she wrote back.

 No, I can't. In case, you've forgotten.... she is a liar and two, even if her disability is real, she still needs proof of it which she had not provided. I will revise the seating plan when she provides proof and if she really does have it then it won't be a problem getting proof of it. Now if you don't mind, I'd like to actually learnt something

 She slid the note back and shook her head at Alya's insulted gasp before continuing with her notes. Time past and soon it was lunchtime. As soon as the bell rang, Marinette jumped up and rushed outside. She was absolutely famished as she had only a croissant for breakfast. She headed into the locker room and put her books away, giving Plagg a slice of cheese as she did before she closed her locker and walked over to the canteen. By the time, she got there, Lila was getting a number of people to get food for her including Alya and Nino. Marinette wanted to shout at her but she took a deep breathe and walked over to the food counter, getting her dinner. 

 "You should try the cheesecake," Luka's voice instantly calmed her down, making her look up and smile as he moved next to her. "So Lila is back I see..."

 "Oh, you don't sound happy about that," She muttered as she reached for the cheesecake he recommended as he placed a macaron on his plate. "Got a sweet craving, Lu?"

 "Maybe," He grinned before glancing at Lila. "I don't like her... her music's all wrong and Anatis hasn't had pleasant things to say... oh god, she's looking at me..."

 He quickly looked away before grabbing Marinette's arm and rushing over to their usual table. They sat down and began to eat as Lila got up and made her way to the table, standing next to Luka and completely blanking Marinette, much to their annoyance. 

 "Hi, I'm Lila," She stated in her shrilled, fake voice. "I haven't seen you here before. Are you new?"

 "I guess," He stated, colder then usual. Not that Lila noticed or if she did, she didn't care.

 "Oh, my gosh. Me too!" She gasped, moving onto the new chair and leaning against him while fluttering her eyelashes at him. Marinette wanted to say something as Luka looked somewhere between uncomfortable and murderous. Again, Lila didn't seem to notice. "Let's be friends,"

 Luka, however, got up and moved to the chair next to Marinette, causing Lila to fall before she caught herself. 

 "No, thank you," He replied, sitting back down. However, Lila wasn't taking no for an answer. She got back up and sat next to him again, grabbing his arm as Marinette gripped her hand into a fist. Luka frowned deeply and tried to pull his arm from her but she dug her nails into him. He winced in pain but glared at her. "Let go,"

 "I just want to be friends," She smirked, leaning against him as she tightened her grip, thinking it would cause him to shut up like it did with Adrien. However, Luka was not Adrien.

 "I said let go!" He shouted a little louder then expected as he yanked his arm free from her, causing a number of people to look over as he took off his hoodie and checked his arm. Marinette let out a gasp as she saw the deep nail marks in his arm. They were deep enough to actually make him bleed a little. Lila was looking at him in surprise as he put his hoodie back on and moved again. Lila got up and went to sit next to him again but Juleka quickly took the seat and shot her a glare as Luka looked at her annoyed. "Seriously? Go sit somewhere else?!"

 "W-Why are you been so mean to me?" She asks, fake tears appearing in her eyes as she stood in front of him. "I just want to be your friend,"

 "Well, I'm not interested in been friends with a liar," He spat back as Alya and Nino walked in. Lila blinked in surprise. She hadn't expected him to know but then she remembered that Anatis had exposed her to all of Paris.  Still, she could spin it to make her look innocent.

 "Liar?" She gasped, fake tears in her eyes. "But I'm not a liar... Marinette told you that, didn't she? She's always had it-"

 "Cut the crap, Rossi," He stated, shocking everyone including Lila and Marinette. She had never seen Luka like this before. "I saw the video on the Ladyblog and I know how to recognize a fake. I'm not interested in been your friend, I don't want you near me and if you ever lean against me or touch me without my permission again, I'll sue you for sexual harassment!"

 The color drained out of her face as she realized he was been perfectly serious and a number of people was kind of glaring at her. She needed to spin this around. She began to cry, making a number of people look at her with sympathy.

 "I-I'm sorry... I didn't realize I was making you uncomfortable," She gasped, fake tears in her eyes. Luka went to say something but Juleka beat him to it.

 "I'm pretty certain him trying to shake you off, telling you to let go and moving shows that he was uncomfortable," She mumbled, making Lila look at her with surprise as Alya stormed over with Nino, having missed what Juleka had said. She had only heard Luka threatening to sue Lila.

 "What the hell, Couffaine?!" Alya gasped, glaring at Luka. "I thought you were cool but Lila was just trying to make friends!"

 "That's as accurate as saying I'm the king of England," He stated, coolly. Marinette wanted to giggle but she noticed the look on Lila's face. She looked smug and Marinette knew she was gonna get the blame.

 "Oh, don't blame him, Alya," She gasped, wiping her 'tears'. "He's obviously been poisoned by what Marinette has said about me, just like Anatis.... Wasn't she the first person to meet him?"

 "Yeah, she was," Alya agreed, making everyone frown as Lila sniffed.

 "No wonder why he thinks I'm a liar. She must have told him all kinds of lies about me after he deakumatized her..." She cried, making most people gasp in surprise and glare at Marinette. "That's why he claimed I was lying on that video and responsible for two akumas. She's obviously convinced him and this boy that I'm a horrible person!"

 "Oh, Lila, that isn't true," Alya gasped as Lila 'cried' on her. "You're a wonderful person,"

 "I know I'm not perfect but I've been trying to be a better person!" She gasped, hiding her face. Luka gripped his drink as people lapped up her lies. "I've been going to therapy for my own akumatization. Oh, Marinette, why did you tell Anatis I was a bully?! If you had been honest, he wouldn't have had a go at me and caused me to become an akuma!"

 "You did what?!" Alya gasped, glaring at her.

 "What?!" Marinette gasped, jumping up. "All I told him was the truth!"

 "I've only tried to be your friend, Marinette," She sniffed, causing Luka to stand up and try to argue for her. Unfortunately, very few people believed him because of the way Lila had spun it. Alya started to berate him for been on the side of the bully as he argued that she was the one standing up for the bully. Seeing her friends argue again, Marinette rushed out and locked herself in the bathroom as she began to cry. She really thought things had gotten better but Lila hadn't even been back for one day and she had already turned her friends against her. She flinched as she heard the bathroom door open, causing her to look up as Lila walked over to her.

 "Oh my god, are you crying?" She gasped in her fake voice, making Marinette frown and flinch. What is she up to? "You are, aren't you? You know it's really not worth fighting over a boy,"

 "What do you want, Lila?" Marinette asked, glaring at her. Lila pretended to look shocked before dropping her act almost instantly as she leaned against the sink. Her whole body language changed to the Lila that Marinette was unfortunately familiar.

 "Just to remind you who's boss, Marinette," She stated before facing her. "Do you remember the last time we were in here?"

 "You threatened me,"

 "Oh so you do remember?" Lila gasped, holding her hands together before stepping forward, causing Marinette to step back. "Then as you'll recall, I told you that if you decided to go against me, I'd take away all of your friends... well, I'm still gonna keep good on that,"

 She slammed her hand against the wall by Marinette to flinch.

 "And your new boyfriend will be the first one I start with," She grinned, making Marinette gasp. "By the time I'm finished, he won't be able to look you in the eye without been disgusted... oh and do you know what would make it so much better? If he fell in love with me... I mean who wouldn't but still that would be the icing on the cake. I mean he's no Adrien Agreste but he's cute in a rockstar kind of way. Definitely would make me look good if I had him on my arm,"

 "Don't you dare touch Luka!" Marinette growled, getting her fire back and surprising Lila. "You can threat me all you want but I will end you if you touch a single hair on his head!"

 She blinked as she stared at Marinette.

 "Oh my, you're in love with him, aren't you?" She smirked, making Marinette blush. "And here I thought you were still hung up over Adrien. Well, all the more reason to turn him against you or maybe I should turn everyone against him... oh, I know! I'll turn everyone against him and then turn him against you so he only had me left. Wouldn't that be grand? Of course, I'll leave him alone if you stop trying to expose me, tell everyone that you made up lies about me and be my friend,"

 "I will only ever be your friend when you stop lying and harassing people!" Marinette gasped, causing Lila to roll her eyes.

 "Marinette, we've been through this before," She smirked, making Marinette frown. "If you don't want to be my friend, fine. It's not a loss to me. After all, I've pretty much turned everyone against you already but if you don't become my friend, your little boyfriend won't have any friends left. I know you're less dumb then the others so I'm gonna give you another chance,"

 She slammed her hand against the wall right near Marinette's head.

 "You're either with me or against me. You don't answer right now. I'll give you to the end of today," She smiled sweetly before a dark expression came across her face. "And I really hope you make the right choice this time, Marinette. I'd hate for Luka to pay for your mistakes,"

 With that, she turned on her heel, leaving Marinette shaking as she slid down the wall. Tears slid down her face as she shook. She thought she could be strong enough to stand up to Lila but now if she continues, Luka will get caught in the crossfire. Lila will turn everyone against him then turn him against her and claim him as her own. She covered her face as she sobbed, unsure how to go forward. If she defies her, Luka will get hurt but if she doesn't, she'll be stuck in the same place she was before. There's no way Lila will leave her alone, even if she stops calling her out. Lila enjoys making her miserable after all. She carefully reached for her phone to text Luka but gasped as an akuma flew straight into it.

 "Princess Justice, we meet again," Hawkmoth smirked as she shook. "Ah, yes. It seems like Miss Rossi intends to make your friend's life hell if you don't do what she wants but I can give you the power to expose her again. Do we have a deal?"

 "I..." She gasped as tears rolled down her face. She wanted to give in but she couldn't. She couldn't do that to him. "N-no..."

 "No?" Hawkmoth asked, shocked. "But this girl is the voice of evil, I ca-"

 "Dollface, listen to me!" Plagg's voice suddenly interrupted Hawkmoth. "You are my best friend and you deserve better then this so resist it, please! You might be super clumsy but you always find a solution so you don't need that dumb butterfly!"

 "Y-You're right!" She gasped, feeling her resolve come back. "I am not a pushover! Lila has no real power over me! I am resourceful! I am confident! I am Marinette!"

 "Very well... but the power is there if you decided otherwise," Hawkmoth stated, surprising her. The akuma fluttered out of her phone and flew off, causing her to let out a breathe as Plagg flew over and hugged her.

 "Thank you, Plagg," She muttered, shaking as she got up. She shakily logged onto the akuma alert and put one up before turning to Plagg. However, before she could transform, the door opened again. Plagg quickly hid as Lila entered the bathroom again, making Marinette frown as she went to edge.

 "Oh, Marinette, I'm glad I caught you again," She stated, moving over. Marinette flinched and took a step back, making Lila frown. "Oh, no. I've gone too far. I'm so sorry, Marinette. I didn't mean to get so mean. I just want to be your friend,"

 "What?" Marinette gasped, taken back. Seeing her chance, Lila quickly kissed her cheek, causing the girl to collapse to the floor as she fell into a deep sleep. Lila morphed into her and smirked.

 "Oops, I lied but you already know that," She smirked, picking her up and dragging her into the locker room. She glanced around and smirked as she saw an open locker. She pushed her inside. "I saw a chance and took it but don't worry. I'm just gonna show everyone what you're really like,"

 She laughed as she closed the door before walking off. Plagg flew out of her purse and frowned as he looked at her.

 "Marinette?!" He gasped, trying to shake her head as she slept. "Wake up!"

 ~Meanwhile~

 Luka frowned as he looked for Marinette. He had noticed her slip away and then be followed by Lila. He tried to leave straight away but Alya got up in his face, causing him to yell at her to get out of his space. As soon as she did, he rushed off but he couldn't find Marinette. He frowned as he headed to the locker room, only for her to exit. He let out a sigh of relief.

 "Marinette, there you are," He called, causing her to look at him.

 "Oh, yes, here I am," She replied, acting a little off but he figured she had been crying. He asked her if she was ok and explained he had been looking for her. However, she suddenly grabbed his hands and smirked at him. "Aww, you're such a sweetheart, Luka. Hey, why don't we go to the bakery and I can give you something sweet as a reward,"

 "Um... you said you would help Juleka and Rose with the designs..." He mumbled, trying to pull his hands away from her. She was not acting like herself. "And you know I prefer to buy from the bakery. Artists need to support other artists,"

 "Oh, I'm sure my parents won't notice a couple of items going missing," She gasped, moving closer. "And it's not like Rose and Juleka are worth my time... not like how you are..."

 She leaned in to kiss him, causing him to push her back.

 "What the hell, Marinette?" He gasped, surprising her.

 "What? Do you want to kiss me?" She asked, surprising him as she traced her fingers over his arm. "I mean you like me right and I like you... so we should kiss..."

 "Not like this," He stated back, stepping back from her. "You're clearly not yourself right now. I don't know what's wrong but your music is off,"

 "My music?" She asked, confused but it was all he needed to fully realize the truth. This wasn't Marinette. He stepped back even more, making her look at him confused. "Luka, what's wrong?"

 "You're not Marinette," He stated, surprising her.

 "What do you mean?" She gasped, wondering how did he know. "Of course, I am-"

 "No, you're not," He gasped. "I don't know who you are but you are not her,"

 "Oh, such a clever boy... why don't I reward you with a kiss?" She smirked, trying to kiss him again but he managed to dodge her. She laughed before jumping up to the first floor and blowing a kiss at him. He ran up the stairs to chase after her but she jumped to the other side o landed in front of Alya and Nino, who were coming out of the canteen with the others. "Oh, Alya! I've been looking for you!"

 "Really, girl?" She asked, surprised as Luka rushed over.

 "Yes, I just wanted to tell you that you're a terrible reporter and you don't deserve Nino! In fact, we all know he only settled for you because he couldn't have me," She smirked, making Alya look at her in betrayal. "Rose, you're nothing more then a dumb blonde, Mylene and Ivan... you're both really fat... Oh, Nathaniel, I don't know how you got that comic book of yours published since you have zero talent... Juleka, you're so moody. How do you think you could possibly be a model when you have no expression and... well..."

 She looked her up and down.

 "Shouldn't you lost the baby fat?" She asked, making Juleka's eyes fill with tears. "And Nino, you don't deserve your cap!"

 She grabbed it and laughed, running off with it as Luka reached them. They all looked outrage as he caught his breathe.

 "Whatever she just said, don't listen," He gasped, making them look at him with surprise. "It isn't the real Marinette. I don't know who it is but-"

 His phone buzzed, causing him to look at it. The akuma alert app had showed one was active near by. He frowned deeply before his eyes widen. Marinette must have been akumatized. 

 "She's an akuma..." He muttered, causing everyone to mutter and gasp.

 "How can you be certain?!" Alya gasped, causing him to show her the phone. She read the alert and frowned as the others read it too.

 "She must have been akumatized after rushing off," Juleka mumbled, making everyone agree. "W-We need to hide. She might come back to do worst to us.."

 "Oh no!" Alya gasped, making them look at her. "She might go after Lila! We need to find her and warn her!"

 "We should split up," Luka suggested, seeing his chance. He had no intention of finding Lila but this gave him a chance to transform. "We can cover more ground that way,"

 "Good idea,"Adrien nodded before giving directions. Luka offered to check the locker room as he could get Tikki from his bag and go out of the window. He ran off as everyone else went to look for Lila and made his way to the locker room. He slipped inside and walked to his locker but heard the sounds of light snores as he walked past a section of lockers. He doubled back and noticed one was slightly ajar. He walked over and opened it, causing him to gasp as he found Marinette inside, asleep.

 "Marinette?!" He gasped, trying to wake her up but she snoozed on. He noticed her cheeks were stained with tears but overall, she didn't look hurt. Feeling a little relief as she wasn't hurt, he decided to head to his locker and get Tikki. She followed him over to Marinette and frowned as she checked her over. "Well?"

 "She seems to be in an enchanted sleep," She muttered, making him frown.

 "Is there any way you can wake her?"

 "I'm afraid not," She mumbled, making him frown. "Unless I use the cure but to do that-"

 "You have to summon a lucky charm," He muttered, frowning. "Could you do that?"

 "Sure, if you want a new planet," She stated, making him frown a little more. "Best thing we can do is transform and find the cause of this sleep,"

 "It has to be the Marinette I saw earlier," He muttered, making Tikki frown. "She looked just like Marinette but wasn't her. Not only was her behavior strange but she insulted her friends and didn't know what I meant when I said her music. Marinette, akumatized or not, would have known,"

 "So another Marinette was running around?"

 "Yes... but this impostor has to be an akuma," He muttered, swiping his earrings. "Tikki, spots on!"

 He transformed and opened his yoyo to see there had been any news reports. One showed a car crash and the other the Marinette imposer balanced on the Eiffel Tower. Luckily, no one had been hurt in the crash and the cure would fix things but he was still annoyed. He frowned and closed his yoyo before looking at Marinette. He couldn't just leave her in the locker. He gently moved her out of it and picked her up. She snuggled against him in her sleep, making him blush a little before he left the room and headed to the nurse's office, coming around Juleka and Rose as he did.

 "Juleka, Rose," He called, making them look over. Rose gasped as she saw him holding Marinette in her arms. He gestured to the nurse office's door, causing Juleka to rush over and open it for him, allowing him to move inside as the nurse gasped and jumped. "Sorry for the intrusion"

 He gently placed Marinette on the bed. She curled up and breathed in lightly as he placed a blanket over her. 

 "What's wrong with her?" Rose asked, making Juleka nod as he faced them.

 "She's in an enchanted sleep," He muttered, making them frown. "She was inside a locker that happened to look in when I was looking for an akuma. I got an alert one was active here so I came to investigate. Your brother told me that he had seen Marinette act odd when he ran into me so I'm guess the Marinette he saw was the akuma and had hidden the real one in a locker,"

 "That means the things she said wasn't really her!" Rose gasped, clearly happy. "I knew Marinette wasn't so mean!"

 "We better tell everyone so we can clear her name," Juleka muttered, making him frown. "Oh, that akuma Marinette insulted us and was really mean. She even stole Nino's hat but since you've found the real Marinette, we can clear her name... but you can wake her right?"

 "She should wake once the akuma is dealt with and the cure has been cast," He muttered, making them nod. "Can you look after her? I have to go after it,"

 "Of course, Anatis," Both girls grinned as he smiled before he nodded at the nurse and left the room. He headed to the Eiffel Tower where a crowd of people had gathered. He jumped up and landed on the edge as Akumanette was balancing on the edge and acting like a total idiot. It was clearly an act to lure him here but still he couldn't just let her or whoever it was fall. The akumanette was holding on to two Lady Noir balloons and laughing as she moved across before misplacing her footing. She screamed as she plummeted down to earth but Anatis threw his yoyo and swung up, catching her. He landed on the ground as everyone clapped.

 "Oh, my prince charming!" She gasped falsely. "You saved my life. How about a kiss?"

 "No, thanks," He muttered but she tried to kiss him anyway, causing him to shove her off and jump away from her. "I know you're not the real Marinette,"

 "Oh my, what a clever bug," She grinned, standing up. "You're right though. I'm not Marinette... I'm Chameleon! You're getting better at this, Anatis, which is a good thing. It will make this fight all the more interesting... so shall we dance, my handsome bug?"

 With that, she charged at him, trying to punching him. He dodged and kicked at her as they spun around. However, she was constantly trying to kiss him as well. He grabbed her arms and flipped her over his arms, pinning her down.

 "Where is your akuma?!" He growled, causing her to wrap her legs around him and throw him off her, surprising him with her strength. He looked up and frowned as she had disappeared. "Damn it,"

 "Anatis, is everything ok?" Nadja asked, holding up her mic. "Why were you fighting against a civilian?"

 "That's not a civilian," He frowned, dusting himself down. "She's an akuma calling herself Chameleon. It appears she has the ability to take on any form so please be careful,"

 "Of course, Anatis," Nadja nodded as he threw his yoyo and pulled himself up to the rooftops. He took out his yoyo and tried to call Lady Noir but she didn't answer. He sighed but put his yoyo away and continued looking. He jumped down to the Trocadéro Gardens as a woman looked for her kid but didn't see Marinette anywhere. He jumped across to a lamp post before looking around then hopping to another one. He frowned as he still didn't see her but she couldn't have gotten far.

 "Anatis!" A little boy called, making him look at him. "I saw the villain running over there!!"

 He pointed towards the carousel, causing Anatis to look over. He jumped down and took out his yoyo.

 "Thanks, kid but you better get somewhere safe. It's dangerous," He muttered, walking over with caution. "Chameleon, it's over! Show yourself!"

 He frowned as he looked around, not seeing her.

 "My Quentin!" A woman gasped, making him look to her. "You've found him, Anatis,"

 "Found him?" He asked, looking at her before turning around, just as the child dived towards him. His eyes widen in surprise as he realized that Chameleon was the child but before it could kiss him, he heard Lady Noir yelling before suddenly been pushed aside, causing Chameleon to kiss her instead. He rolled and looked up as Chameleon turned in Lady Noir while the real one fell to the ground, asleep. "Lady Noir?!"

 She went to take her ring but he threw his yoyo, stopping her from doing so as she faced him.

 "It looks it's down to the two of us, Anatis?" She smirked, using Lady Noir's voice. "Don't you think I make a purrfect kitten?!"

 "I prefer the real deal," He snarled back, causing her to laugh before throwing up her hair in the air and summoning Lady Noir's cataclysm. Anatis frowned deeply as the dark energy appeared in her hand before he spun his yoyo. "Let's find out who you really are, Chameleon,"

 "Not before I discover your identity first," She threw back before running at him. He dodged her attacks as she tried to grab him or hit him with her charged up hand. "Too bad that Lady Noir's power is going to destroy you,"

 She tried to kiss him, causing him to dodge.

 "Ever heard of consent?!" He retorted back, dodging her again. He briefly lost his foot and tripped, causing her to try and jump on him but he threw her off and jumped over to a lamp post. "Hey, bet you can't catch me,"

 He jumped over the Eiffel Tower and climbed up it, causing her to follow. He stood on part of it with his arms as she landed on the edge and smirked at him.

 "No where to run, Bug boy," She growled as he smirked.

 "I don't intend to," He replied, throwing up his yoyo and summoning his lucky charm. He caught it and frowned as she laughed at it. "A t-shirt?" 

 "That's your plan, Anatis? Make me dress like you?" She laughed, clearly mocking him before glancing at him with a critical eye. "On second thoughts, such horrible fashion might actually do me in,"

 She charged at him, causing him to jump back and wrap the shirt around his arm before he threw his yoyo, grabbing her baton and pulling it out her hands. He threw it off the tower and blocked her attack as she tried to hit him. She growled and aimed a kick at him, causing him to move around the area they were in. She managed to kick him and knocked him back before diving at him. She landed on him, knocking him down onto the ground as his yoyo bounced down to the lower level. She tried to kiss him but he pushed back her head. She smirked and moved her hand, causing him to block her before he managed to threw her off, making her laugh as she walked towards him, corning him off as he took a fighting stance

 "You trapped and without your precious yoyo," She smirked, running towards him with her hand out stretched. However, he stepped to the side and grabbed her hand before tripping her up and slamming her hand into the ground, causing the floor to rush and break. The two of them fell down as his luck vision lit up the waitress, an oyster knife and an oyster. He smirked as he landed on the counter and grabbed the nearest one as she landed on the ground next to him. She jumped up and went to kiss him but he slammed the oyster onto her lips and smirked at her surprised expression as she stumbled back, causing the Oyster to drop. "Oh, no,"

 Pink sparkles appeared as she transformed into an oyster and fell to the ground. Anatis rolled off the counter and picked it up before turning to the terrified waitress. He helped her to her feet as Lady Noir came over.

 "Are you ok?" He asked, getting a nod of her as the oyster made a noise, causing Lady Noir to raise an eyebrow. He held it up and smirked. "Say hello to our akuma,"

 "Seems she clammed up a little," Lady Noir grinned, making Anatis shake his head. "So how do we get her out of the shell?"

 "I think I have an idea," He muttered, turning to the waitress and holding out the shirt and oyster. "Would you mind?"

 "Of course, Anatis," She smiled, taking the items of him and grabbing the oyster knife. She made quick work of opening it before holding it out to him. "Monsieur,"

 "Thank you," He smiled as he picked the black pearl that was inside. "Time to see what you look like, Chameleon,"

 "It's an old acquaintance," Lady Noir frowned, making him frown as well before he broke the pearl and released the akuma. He captured it with his yoyo and freed the purified version before taking the t-shirt that the waitress held out and threw it into the air.

 "Miraculous Ladybugs!" He shouted, causing it to burst into the magical swarm. It flew around fixing everything before disappearing. The oyster turned purple and transformed back into Lila, causing Anatis to frown deeply and cross his arms as he looked annoyed and unimpressed. "Lila Rossi... why am I not surprised?"

 "Anatis? Oh my gosh, was I akumatized?" She gasped. "I am so sorry. I was just so upset about how Marinette was treating me. She's such a horrible girl and I know she lied to you-"

 "Lila, that's enough!" He growled, making him go quiet as he pinched his nose. "Marinette didn't lie to me about you. She didn't even mentioned your name or imply it was you when she was akumatized. Also, she didn't make you lie about been a superhero now, did she?"

 "I- urg! You're the worst!" She gasped, jumping down and storming off. Anatis shook his head before turning to Lady Noir.

 "I'm sorry but I have to get going. She tried to frame Marinette and I want to make sure she's ok," He explained, making her nod and attempt to hide her blush as he walked over to the edge of the tower before stopping and waving at her. "See you later, kitten,"

 "Bye..." She sighed, dreamily before shaking her head and leaving. She needed to get to the school before he does. She managed to find her way there and climbed into a classroom, de-transforming quickly before rushing out, just as he landed in the courtyard. He looked around and saw her, smiling as he did. He jumped up and landed on the railing near her, making her smile shyly. "H-Hi,"

 "Hey, I'm glad to see you're awake," He stated, making her blush. "I was worried,"

 "Oh, I'm ok!" She gasped, holding up her hands. He smiled and nodded as his earrings beeped.

 "Ah... gotta go," He mumbled, throwing his yoyo and flying off as she sighed. Rose and Juleka ran over.

 "Marinette, there you are!" Rose gasped, hugging her as Juleka caught her breathe. "Don't run off like that,"

 "I'm sorry. I just wanted to warn Anatis," She mumbled as Lila walked into the courtyard. She noticed Marinette and glared at her before huffing and walking off. The bell rang, causing the three girls to sigh and walk towards the class. However, Marinette heard her name been called, making her turn around as Luka ran over and hugged her. She blinked but hugged back. Juleka grabbed Rose and pulled her inside as she looked like she was about to squeal with delight. Luka gently let go off Marinette and looked at her.

 "You're ok," He gasped, happy to see she was alright. "I was so worried that you had been akumatized again,"

 "Oh no... not me... it was Lila," She muttered, holding up her hands but then Lila's threat came into her mind. The akuma had been after her and Lila had been in a pretty good mood after threatening her so how did she get akumatized? "But it doesn't add up..."

 "What doesn't?"

 "Lila been akumatized..." She muttered, looking down. "I think she might have been the next target for the akuma but I don't know why...."

 "Next target?" He asked, concerned. "But you said you weren't akumatized...."

 "And I wasn't but...." She muttered, looking down. "Hawkmoth did try. He promised me power again but I resisted I promise!"

 "I believe you," Luka smiled, looking at her with a gentle look. "And I'm proud of you for resisting him...but can I ask why? I know Lila had followed you to the bathroom. I tried to find you after I noticed but..."

 She frowned and looked down as tears filled her eyes. He frowned deeply and pulled her into his arms as Miss Bustier walked out of the class. She looked at him and then at Marinette, who was sobbing against his chest.

 "Mr Couffaine, would you mind taking Marinette home?" She asked, making her look up as she gave her a gentle look. "Tell her parents she has my permission for the rest of the afternoon off and if she needs tomorrow off as well, she can. I'll get one of the class members to bring any home work to her. I'll inform Ms Mendeleiev off your absence while you take her home,"

 "Of course, Miss Bustier," He replied, gently leading Marinette away from the class and out of the school. Marinette kept quiet as she sniffed and wiped her eyes as they walked. They entered the bakery, causing Sabine to look up and rush over when she saw her daughter in tears. Luka explained as best as he could what had happened and told her what Miss Bustier said, causing Sabine to fuss over her daughter and take her upstairs. She came back down and gave him some free food before telling that Marinette had fallen asleep for now and if he wanted, he could come by and see her later. He nodded and left, heading back to school. The rest of the afternoon went really quickly and soon he found himself telling Juleka he would be heading to Marinette to check in on her. She asked him to take the homework of that afternoon to her since he was already heading there, causing him to take them and place it into his bag before Rose and her ran off. He turned to walk off but found Lila in his pathway.

 "Oh, hi, Luka," She grinned, in her false voice. "I wanted to talk to you as I think we got off on the wrong foot,"

 "No, we didn't," He stated, coldly.

 "I don't understand why you seem to hate me," She gasped, insulted. "You haven't even given me a chance,"

 "I don't need to," He stated, making her frown. "I can tell what kind of person just from your song and yours can't even be called that,"

 "What do you mean?"

 "Simple, I hear the sound of people's hearts," He explained, making her frown. "And I'd rather listen to nails on a chalkboard then your heart,"

 "Harsh," She gasped as he went to walk away.

 "But true," He stated, making her frown even more. "Not that you would know about that. Now if you excuse me, I have places to be,"

 He went to walk away but she stopped him.

 "I see you've made a decision, Luka," She stated, making him glare down at her. "I was hoping you would become my friend but clearly, you've decided to move against me so from now on, you and I are at war. You're gonna lost your friends and end up alone. Not even Marinette will want to look at you when I'm done. She'll hate you and your life will end up in chaos, thanks to me,"

 She smirked at him, thinking it will scare him but he merely smirked.

 "We'll see about that, Lila," He replied, not even trembling. She frowned as he should be terrified. "You know what they say about Chaos right?"

 "What?"

 "From Chaos comes creation," He smirks, making her frown. "And I'm very creative, especially when there is chaos. After all, I am a Couffaine and chaos runs deep in my blood so go ahead and try,"

 He smirked as she stood there, shaking before he walked off, whistling to himself as he did.

 ~Later that Night~

 "Hey, Kitten," Anatis stated as he walked over to Lady Noir, who was sat on a rooftop. She looked over and smiled as he sat down before he took out his yoyo and reached in, taking out a bag of cookies before taking one for himself and offering one to her. She thanked him and took one, happily eating it. "So Lila got reakumatized..."

 "Yeah and I don't think it was unintentional," She muttered, making him frown. "I talked to Marinette as I was worried about her,"

 "What did you find out?" He asked, looking at her.

 "She was almost reakumatized," She muttered, making him frown. "She resisted it and activated the akuma alert to let us know then Lila came back in, caught her off guard and kissed her,"

 "That's how she changed into her," He muttered, frowning. "But why was she nearly akumatized and then Miss Rossi?"

 "I think I can answer that too," She explained. "I asked Marinette the same thing and she told me that Lila had threatened her and her friend, Luka,"

 "She what?!" He yelled, making her blink and look at him. He took a deep breathe and tried to calm himself down. "Continue please,"

 "Uh... Marinette said that Lila threatened to destroy his friendships then turn him against Marinette so he would only have Lila left," She mumbled, making him frown deeply. Lila clearly thought he was attractive enough to want to steal him from Marinette... not that he was actually hers but it made him glad that him and Jagged had agreed not to go public yet. "But she was confused that Lila got akumatized. Apparently, Lila was in quite the giddy mood after her threat,"

 "So why would she get akumatized?" He asked, frowning.

 "Her akumatization doesn't add," Lady Noir muttered, making him frown. "She wasn't upset or angry,"

 "What if she didn't need to be?" He muttered, making her look at him. "Hawkmoth uses negative emotions to track and make akumas but the butterfly miraculous doesn't work like that naturally. It's butterfly could just give any powers as long as they felt something so what if Lila saw the butterfly and took it for herself?"

 "But that would suggest that Lila did that intentionally?" Lady Noir gasped, making him nod. "You really think she would do that?"

 "She threatened two people despite knowing that there is a psychotic super villain who targets bad emotions and has made it clear she is willing to hurt people," He points out, making her frown.

 "Wait... two people?" She asked, making him sigh.

 "She threatened Luka in person," He muttered, making her frown. "He told me about it before I came here,"

 "Why that little witch!" She gasped, making him look at her with surprise. "You know what?! She is definitely capable of willingly helping Hawkmoth!"

 "I agree," He stated, looking back at the skyline. "I'm gonna ask my informants at the school to keep an eye on her,"

 "And the fact that she helped Hawkmoth?" Lady Noir asked, making him look at her.

 "We gather evidence," He stated, making her smile. "Every scrap of prove we have so she can't wiggle her way out of it and we cover everything. If she's willing to work with a terrorist then who knows what else she's done,"

 "Sounds good to me," She nodded. "I ask my informants to help out,"

 "You have informants?"

 "Of course, I do," She grinned, giving him a cheeky wink. He chuckled and shook his head before munching on his cookie. She gently moved over and leaned her head against his shoulder, causing him to look at her again. "This ok?"

 "Yeah," He smiled, looking back at the skyline. "It is,"

-------------------------------------------

Next Chapter: https://ultra-sassyduck.tumblr.com/post/639463660148932608/miraclous-rise-of-anatis-42

[lehouxnap2]

Vent fic/

The way im telling myself to not do it.

Just don't make a comment on a good fic I've read.

Why? Because i'm going to be mean about it, unintentionally.

The fic was good, specially the first chapter, where i was so close to add it to my fav fics collections and make a fanart, share it everywhere and repeat how good it was.

But the same way it was good, it was... questionable, the second chapter just....

Ruined it.

And just because I didn't like it, it doesn't mean it's bad. The writing was good, the story was great, the characters were there. But

The ideology of it all? The final message? How old are you? Are you a fourteen years old edgy teen?

See? That type of comments come out of me, and I don't want to sound so upset about the fic. Because I was, but I don't think the author deserves that. An annoying little reader who disagrees.

So I'm going to drop my comment here.

The fic was, edgily stupid. And sad

It was a jeanmarco fic, old.

Speaking of old, the amount of times the author, or more like, 'Marco' repeated how old they were all the time it made want to punch him in the face, we fucking get it, you are old!

I can't fathom how the first and second chapter were written by the same person, because it really feels like it wasn't. So many... inconsistencies.

At first, Marco wasn't happy where he was, and sounded deeply in love, to suddendly all of that take a turn of 180° and find himself 'better' in that shitty place with shitty people and not loving Jean anymore.

My problem wasn't where things were going, it hit me hard knowing i wasn't going to get a happy ending, but i can accept that. My problem laid on Marco's point of view of life and love. And ... his sudden change. It was just too fast.

Way too fast for my liking, way too fast for me to feel anything for Marco. And this is where the writer takes the reward of "Congratulations! You actually made me dislike Marco, you made me want to wish nothing for him and constantly pissing me off". I've read fics where Marco was a total cunt, and I never ever disliked him, so this truly takes the price.

And I don't mean this in a bad way. Because, I repeat, it was good writing. Marco just happened to be, the kind of person i cannot stand. Having a big cold cold heart. And edgy thoughts.

I myself have edgy thoughts, I'm a nihilist afterall, I do think life is meaningless, but the thing i never do, is telling others how things work or how things should be. Because that's fucking annoying and pretentious. (A reminder that this is just my rant and not a 'the truth' statement)

There was a part where Marco said "Jean is well". Jean, this same Jean who barely kept it together, having mental breakdowns, and having a really horrible and traumatizing past, and broke half his house out of anger at himself, apparently is doing "well". Thank you Marco, for being so considerate.

I didn't want to be so specific with the plot. But fuck it.

The author kept repeating the story was about letting go.

And, that's not what I felt. It didn't felt like both of them tried to do something and then realizing it wasn't working, so they both let go of the past and their dying love.

It felt more like Marco had a sudden change of heart, because he took a decision out of a whim, being totally unresponsible for playing with Jean's heart. I'm glad at the end Eren insulted him, it was indeed fucking stupid. And to think I was myself cheering when it happened because, again, the inconsistency!

When it happened, Marco sounded so sure of himself, nervous but happy, he cried out of joy, because the dream he longed for so long finally happened. To suddendly the next chapter start with a "no, i don't want this".

Why would you write an scene so beautiful, and with joy, with a new start ahead, getting away of your homophobic parents, only to scrap all of that so sudden?

Because it was edgy, because life sucks, love is not real, and blah blah blah. Seriously though, you can say those things without sounding like a scratched cassette from a 2000's emo band.

And omg, the thing about the parents pissed me off. Marco felt "loved" by his parents because they sended him a voice message. Your homophobic parents that saw you with disgust your whole life suddendly love you because you won't be there to cook for them. Good job Marco! Fuck Jean who only went through with his life thinking he'll see you again, and only coming back to that shitty town to take you out of it.

I just kept thinking "well, this is not going to work as a relationship, can you atleast live together as friends?" He didn't have to comeback, but for some reason he did. Or atleast, the author didn't gave me any reason. What was the reason??

Turns out, Marco was all about Jean this, Jean that, for later be like "Oh Jean, i forgot about you long time ago lol"

Yeah, hmmmm that inconsistency love ❤ Like I said. The first chapter felt so different from the second that I didn't recognize Marco, it was totally different, and more cold than he already was. By not liking puppies!! How dare you xD

I wouldn't say Marco was 100% cold, but everytime he cried it felt like he was crying for his sorry ass, than for the whole situation with Jean. For not doing the "logical thing with his emotions". Oh stfu! There's no logic on emotions, everyone knows that you fucking dumbass 🤣

Alright, I'm over my rant. I really wish i could say all this to the writer but I don't know if fic writers take this type of criticism.

[halothenthehorns]

All in the Family

Chapter 25: Mudbloods and Murmurs

"Sirius?"

"Here," Sirius said at once shuffling out of the shadows behind the door, taking Remus' outstretched hand. Remus gave a little tug, whispering, "come here," and Sirius obliging straddled his lap on a bed, now the two were forehead to forehead.

It should have felt too intimate, they'd only had a chance to snog twice and both had been interrupted, they really hadn't explored much of anything for what they were doing to each other outside of even that, so this was quite the situation for the two to just be comfortably in each others arms. It was just that though, comfortable. All the emotions boiling inside Sirius now felt just slightly simmered, like steam finding its release in a teapot rather than all stewing up inside and blowing the top.

"Now tell me what's wrong," Remus whispered, their faces so close together their lips were already brushing.

"You've got enough to deal with Moony-" he tried to protest, unable to shake those fear-filled looks he continued to give every window, like the one they'd again had to glance anxiously through to check the phase of the moon on this new night.

"Doesn't matter, I'll still always hear what you've to say," Remus stated, their hands still clasped together growing painful from Remus' tightening. His other came up and hooked onto the back of his neck, fingers playing with the long black hair to make sure he couldn't back out.

Sirius breathed carefully, closing his eyes and finally feeling his heartbeat still as he whispered, "He laughed Remus! My first summer back, and the first thing he asked me was 'what's a mudblood?' I gave him hell for saying that word, telling him to never use it again because there was no such thing, we were all just people. He promised he wouldn't, said he'd never meant to offend me. Now, bloody five years later, and he laughs! It's my fault, I know it is, I should have been around him more, made sure he never, that I never let him-"

"Let him?" Remus cut in with a deep shake of his head. "Sirius no, don't do this to yourself. That boy in there may share your last name, but he is not your responsibility! He made his own choice, he's following his parents and told you to take a hike when you refused to do the same."

Like a damn bursting, Sirius then released a huge breath at finally saying this aloud. "I know that, it's just..." he trailed off without words for the disappointment he felt, like Regulus' fate was already sealed by this lone reaction.

It had only been the chapter title, his expression had been more surprise than true cruelty, but Sirius couldn't shake it! He'd strode away through the nearest door lest he do something he regret, like use an Unforgivable curse on his little brother. It was honestly a miracle he'd found one that opened.

There was a silence before Remus leaned forward, now pressing their lips together in a firm kiss. Sirius returned it at once, craving any kind of release from his own mind, cupping his own hand around Remus' neck to tilt his head back and exalting in the almost instant relief of not having to know anything, just feel how happy it made him to share this and now have the pleasure of taking his own life by however he wanted.

Daring shot through him, and his tongue began tracing lips, seeking entrance, and as always Remus was willing, opening his mouth and the two outright snogging right there in that room. Their tongues explored every bit of reach, teeth even clicking together with the intensity and then Remus' hand moved to Sirius' hip, sitting him down tighter upon his lap.

When Sirius' hair tickled his own nose beyond his own capability to think past it though, he leaned back and brushed it out of his face, still breathing as heavily as when Remus had entered, but now for a wholly other reason. "Guess I believe you now, about that kissing others thing."

Remus just gave a sly smile back, hand still resting comfortably on his waist as if it were the most natural thing in the world, his other trying to pull his face back down from inside his hair. "Glad you've admitted superiority on this."

"No, no," Sirius resisted, letting their faces lean back down but refusing those tantalizing inches now just for that.

An insistent knock on the door cut off whatever would have been said next.

"Hell Sirius, I'll make Regulus apologize if you lot would get out of there already! You think we're enjoying all these Lockharts gaping at us, it's getting creepy!"

"I'm going to kill Wormtail," Sirius pleasantly informed his seat mate as he glared at the door.

"I'll help you bury the body," Remus promised even as he gently got Sirius to get off of him.

With a little huff Sirius did get up and stomp to the door, but couldn't deny he did feel better as he opened it and glared down at Wormtail while pleasantly informing him, "I hope you heard that."

"What, more death threats against me? Sirius, if you carried out every one you've offered against the lot of us, you'd be in Azkaban for a killing spree."

"Me?" Sirius mock widened his eyes and placed his hand on his heart.

"You'll still be his first victim," Remus promised as he pushed the two out of his way so he could step back through.

It really was creepy, the Lockharts eyeing everyone of them from every available wall space of the room. The adjoining bedchamber they'd surely just been in likely still had more, if either of them had cared enough to look, though they'd been a bit occupied to even find a light.

Sirius was already tempted to go back in there and do so now just for something to do, anything would be better than looking anywhere about the room than at his kid brother who had already so deeply betrayed him he wasn't sure if he could ever look at him again. When Remus had read that, Lily had gasped with insulted surprise, and the rest of them had muttered words of distaste and backed away from Moony as if just being associated with such a word was damning. Not his kid brother though, of course not, he'd gone snickering away like a little idiot!

When had this become his reaction, who had instilled it in him? His parents, fellows at school? He'd already witnessed Regulus hanging out with several he shouldn't be, and rather than do anything to stop him, he'd only further chosen to ignore his brother, and was now kicking himself for such neglect. What if he'd tried harder, made some real attempts to push him in the right direction...

Sirius was so focused on when exactly his inattention had turned into missing such a large detail as this reaction would occur that he completely missed the first few bits about Harry avoiding attention from Lockhart and Colin, something he couldn't blame the kid for it if he had been listening.

Potter and Pettigrew were still exchanging looks, it was clear neither of them liked the fact that their friends kept wondering off to talk about their problem without consulting them, but Frank turned away from their tiff without concern to start investigating this room. He didn't at all buy into the fact a man claiming to be so successful couldn't handle pixies, or indeed would make such a stupid decision as releasing them into a classroom like that. Something was fishy about this one, and he wanted to know if there was any evidence in here of his lying, or something more.

Alice let Frank wander off muttering about falsities as she made her way over to Evans, who was muttering mutinously about this whole entire chapter being centered around Quidditch. Harry's captain had woken him at the crack of dawn, and now they were spending pages hearing of Harry falling asleep to some stupid methods to do with the game.

She may have actually enjoyed the game, except for the fact that when she'd gone to the ones in her first year Potter had taken the opportunity to try and regal her the entire time. This child's experience wasn't proving much better.

"That Colin kid is something," Alice happily offered as she joined her. "Bet he'll be the top photographer for the next Daily Prophet before he even graduates."

"I'm happy Harry's not encouraging him and mostly ignoring him," Lily's scowl lessened slightly while talking to her.

Both girls were admittedly distracted as Lupin announced the arrival of the Slytherin team at the Gryffindors practice, everyone was well aware they were only there to pick a fight.

Frank briefly looked up from Lockharts desk, finding it quite despicable Malfoy had managed to buy his way onto a house team like that, but quickly went back to his rummaging. He'd normally be appalled to the idea of going through a teacher's desk, but honestly he would have made an exception for this one even before his suspicions. This egocentric man needed someone putting a few pins in his life if this mess was any indication. The surface was covered in his plaques and trophies of awards, his Witch Weekly's Most Charming one at the very front and most highly polished. In the first two drawers he'd found nothing but quills and bottles of ink at a ready notice, the most ostentatious was a peacocks feather. In the next set he'd found hair care products and a wig he must test them on, a bottle of Ogdens old Fire-whisky, which he quickly put back away lest the Marauders get another hare up their butts for it, and finally nothing in the bottom one.

He'd just pulled out his wand to try a few spells and see if anything were hidden in this when the shouts of outrage echoed around, the Lockhart picture on the desk nearly fell off the broom he was riding and covered his ears. He looked to Alice first, who had her arm wrapped protectively around Evans' shoulders, then he really saw it wasn't so much protective as restraining. Her face was flushed red and she looked likely to murder someone, like Regulus, who looked more haughty than ever with all eyes on him.

Regulus held himself loose and proud just like he watched Sirius do all the time when bowing up for a fight, entirely unintentionally. He really couldn't understand what their problem was, as he insisted again, "it's just a laugh, stop taking everything so sensitive Sirius."

He could tell others around him were just as upset he'd laughed again when Malfoy had called that Granger girl a mudblood. His own parents had insisted it was the proper word to use on Muggleborns, and this was always the reaction amongst quite a few of the older Slytherins whenever they heard the word, so he'd thought it was just to be expected and Sirius was exaggerating everything like he always did. He wasn't as sure now, seeing all seven of them look at him like scum instead. He wasn't backing down though, and instead crossed his arms and stood there purposefully. He wasn't taking it back, he had no reason to, and the only one it should really offend was Evans, and she was such a prick to them all anyways he hardly considered it a loss.

James still had his wand out, tapping it restlessly against his hip and aching to throw a multitude of curses. The only thing stopping him was just how much he did look like Sirius right now, but it was a quickly dwindling insecurity, Sirius would never stoop so low to laugh at something like this. He'd just raised his wand when Moony chose that moment to keep going, his voice much harsher than usual, and it wasn't hoarseness from one of their nightly wanderings this time.

Now James and Sirius were the ones exchanging such heavy loaded looks, while Peter began edging around all three of his friends as if looking where to place himself in case of a fight. Remus was most certainly not happy about it, but was still of the opinion if Sirius was beating himself up already for Regulus just laughing at the word, Sirius would be in an even worse way if he actually snapped and attacked him, so he tried to persevere and keep a fight from happening.

Ron had attacked Malfoy in retaliation for his friend being called that, as he well should, Alice viciously thought as Lupin kept going around the tense silence. She was still thinking about doing the same for Evans, and was even more surprised Potter and Blacks own brother hadn't first. She had no idea what was holding them back, but it wasn't going to stop her if Regulus didn't fix that attitude in laughing about such a degrading word. She genuinely applauded Ron's use of slugs, wishing she knew that spell now.

Lily forced herself to turn away from that imp, patting Alice's hand in thanks but refusing to give any more acknowledgment to someone who could be so careless about such language as that Black. Least Potter had one thing going for him in that way, he'd clearly been moments away from making him apologize if his best mate wasn't hesitating on doing the same.

They were all grateful Ron was being dragged away from Malfoy before anything else could happen, even Regulus. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to be doing now that he had everyone in the room despising him for something he'd just thought was natural, especially as many pure-bloods were in this room. He wasn't that surprised at Potter and Black not getting the joke, but he at least would have hoped Longbottom and Smith would, and was now trying to examine in his head the differences between those two and others even outside of Slytherin who had laughed along before. He still managed to scoff in disgust at that oafs deceleration that marrying muggles had saved their species, of course they wouldn't have died out, pure-bloods always prevailed.

Lockhart popping up again to give advice to yet another round of advice to someone who obviously didn't need it had Frank again going back to his rummaging, bypassing the empty drawer for now and going carefully through all the surrounding paintings, only mildly paying attention to Ron explaining what had happened while at Hagrids. He found nothing of any more significance than Lockhart signing several of these as well, and errantly wondered if the man did them himself. He had to be good at something after all, and it clearly wasn't what he was boasting of in the fight against the Dark Arts.

Sirius finally drew his eyes away from Regulus glaring determinedly at them all, with no more of an idea what to do than when he'd first snickered at the beginning of the chapter. For the first time since his kid brother had been sorted into Slytherin though, he wanted one. He wasn't even sure to what degree, it seemed like a long lost battle to save the idiot from what their parents wanted of him, but Sirius still couldn't shake the feeling of failure Regulus had fallen so far already at the age of fourteen. Least McGonagall gave a nice, or terrible depending on viewpoint, distraction with that detention.

"I think our Head of House is trying to do your son in this year Prongs," he happily told him to try and put some attention back on himself. He'd need to find a bigger space to try and talk his friends into some ideas, he didn't want Regulus overhearing.

"I think it's the opposite, she might actually be trying to give him a treat, as obvious as Lockhart's taken a liking to him," James rolled his eyes back, though they were still sour and glaring to the door.

"What say you Pete?" He redirected. "Care to place a bet? Think someone's going to do Harry in again this year. I've now counted two teachers making a good go of it."

"You're awful," Wormtail pleasantly informed him.

"Oh, you're right," Sirius theatrically clapped a hand to his head. "It is three, I always forget about Snivellus!"

All four of them burst out laughing, to Lily's disgust, but their amusement was short lived. Lupin kept going through Lockhart's bloody useless detention, and she'd thought nothing could be worse than lines, when Harry heard something that had them all freezing in place.

It became so stiff and silent in the room you could hear a ghost breathing, but no whisper of the words echoed again through here. Frank sprinted back to the desk and double checked the time when Lockhart himself said what it was, and spoke so softly the others thought it a guttering of the candle for a moment, "well, it's the same time now. Must mean that whatever it is, isn't here now."

Lupin still had to fight hard several times to swallow around a dry throat and finish, Harry's doubt of hearing this not managing to trickle into a single one of them. They would not think so lightly of someone after this kid again, not after last year, and Sirius now felt callous for his own joke. Something was going on this year, Dobby had warned them, and this was the start to it.

Frank gave Regulus one last look of distaste as if he wanted to blame all this on him, he still seemed entirely careless about the whole thing, and went back to that last drawer.

One quick spell revealed Lockhart did have something at least mildly worth hiding in here, and another had a stack of papers appearing. Frank slowly peeled through them, but it only furthered his confusion to find interviews. The one on top featured someone from Armenia, and it was clearly only the last page of whatever they'd been talking about in regards to a werewolf, then the same man thanking Lockhart for sending an advanced copy of his book. Why would these be so poorly hidden, they didn't seem to mean a thing. As intensely focused as he was on these, he hardly registered the magnetic pull of being dragged away.