#but at the same time i dont think im wrong for thing what i do
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by god you understand
ramble under the cut i wanna geek out about this so bad lol
sorry to ramble a bit about the layton family, but their flaws in constantly trying to live up to this standard/deal with their main conflict is so interesting because you almost don't expect it from the children of layton of all things. like ,,, sure you'd understand the expectation, but like from an outsider standpoint it feels so strange, like youd think there should be some sort of proper maturity about it at least. at their core they really are like their dad though
im not gonna go on a tirade about how neglectful layton may be as a parent but they all have a common trait of going after some adventure rather than handling what's important. an example for layton is him going after katrielle's father despite there ,,kind of not really being a large benefit (and also generally not being in the picture anymore.) he's smart enough to understand that the pros dont outweigh the cons in possibly leaving katrielle completely alone, should something go wrong. if the canon considered alfendi, the same goes for him as well - neglecting the both of them for the sake of some fruitless adventure with the idea that it could possibly be righteous. those stakes are all for only one child, might i add.
outside of his kids though layton just has a huge problem with neglecting his main responsibilities - dude was never a detective but is very frequently treated to be like one, so much so to the point where his kin decided to take up that role. as a professor he put his job in jeopardy tons of times for the sake of adventure.
katrielle and alfendi neglect their main conflicts in their own ways. (i gotta replay mystery room to get a proper grasp at it so forgive me if this portion of the ramble is stupid lol,) the both of them are clearly at least a little bit tormented by the loss of layton, especially since it happened at such a young age. i feel like the both of them handle these emotions through some sort of escapism and dancing around the issue, though one is clearly more angry about it than the other.
katrielle is hopeful and sees her father in a better light, but wants so badly too to become her own person despite him. either way she misses him dearly. alfendi however is a lot more blunt about how he feels towards him. and i don't have a lot of proof regarding his opinion, that line of dialogue "forget hershel, I am layton" really gives me the feeling that he's not on good terms with layton. though i doubt he's addressing this anger properly with how infrequently layton is mentioned in-game.
all that said i do really like the idea of them having arguments about layton himself. the idea that katrielle is constantly defending their father while alfendi is trying to make her see him for what he thinks he is is SUCH an interesting thought. i do believe that they'd both be too emotional to have a genuine talk about it, and my personal headcanon is that they're apart solely because of this conflict (and also just arguments about who should "take his place," with katrielle probably winning by taking up the logo and the hat silhouette). but in canon i really don't think that's the case and that is greatly upsetting lmfao
to answer your question that u probably dont want answered but im gonna answer anyway:
i have an inkling the canon is that they could've been raised separately, hence why we haven't had a genuine canon interaction, and that mystery room takes place after layton is found. (like directly after.) that said i only have one piece of evidence for this idea and its a spoiler lol so i wont state it, plus it's pretty weak. but i think their timelines just clash big time and level 5 just never figured out how to organize it properly.
i really really hope we get a season 2 of the anime because lord knows what i would give to know the canon dynamic of the family and if they really did argue/have conflicts. they are such a perfect fit for a "functional" dysfunctional family and i think it would be REALLY sicknasty for it to be one of layton's flaws to be a kind of crap father despite how great of a man he is. it humanizes them in a way i love sm i have so many ideas i want to draw . okay ramble over sorry to anyone who had to scroll this far ty though pray emoji
hi heres another interest.uhhh layto n siblings arguing about who deserves the layton name . ft an adultish design of flora
#sorry muzzable this is kind of just repeating what you said#i also go feral for the layton family they have so many problems#and so many flaws despite being LAYTONS#escapism is crazy amongst them all#i really wish i had an idea of how flora turned out#professor layton#rambles#sketchalicious.txt#layton brothers mystery room#where tf is katrielle's game tag lmfao
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Season 6 is cooking so bad im crying oml. I gotta word vomit about it because i literally have no one to talk about it with.
So!! The side characters getting depth???? You’re telling 13 year old me that we’ll actually have an opportunity to connect to them 😭 don’t make me cry. Not trying to be salty, im genuinely happy we have it now. I understand their hands were tied up to this point and whatever happened between s5 and s6 did the show so good.
The whole bad parents shtick is getting layed on pretty thick which makes me think its building something up. If i had to guess its definitely has sum to do with Adrien. Im betting by the end of the season Adrien will finally admit out loud that his father was abusive (not just a few mumbles about him being distant) and it isnt wrong to hate him for that even if he’s a “hero”. In fact that’s what its trying to do, the story is telling the viewers that parents aren’t all that glorified and you CAN take them off the pedestal if they’re not great parents. You don’t have to love them unconditionally just because theyre family. People can stand up against injustice and the parent can face judgement and CHANGE. Something gabriel couldn’t do time and time again and i can only guess how that will blow up later.. so i think the reason why it frequently comes up so the moment Adrien actually does admit to the abuse or stands up for himself or comes out with his side of the story it feels much more satisfying and closer. Imagine yourself as a little kid watching s6 and getting the message that you can tell your parents to change over and over again and when the final episode comes out Adrien does that, imagine how vindicated you’d feel. That yes, STAND UP ADRIEN!! AS YOU SHOULD!!
Anyhow, another thing i noticed is how Marinette is somewhat almost always “responsible” for the akumatized person. I believe this is just Lila’s way of manipulating Marinette into feeling guilty bit by bit, slowly. Or when the ultimate moment to expose her or ruin her image comes to, she can show how everything was connected to her. I think the finale with her will be that she’ll try to ruin her image as Marinette just as well as Ladybug. If she were to expose her identity she’d do it in a way so she buries Marinette into the ground. Therefore she’d expose the lie she told as Ladybug, as well as how big of a failure she is as Marinette and that Ladybug is in fact “causing” the akumas. She’s obviously closely monitoring her life since all the characters that have been akumatized so far has been in her close vicinity. PSYCHOLOGICAL WARFARE YAYYYY!!
Also its absolutely unbelieable how pretty the show is. I dont care how much people bitched about how its not the same anymore and they miss the old one etc, i think thats just people scared of change xx. Its genuinely so pretty, its a work of art honestly. The way sometimes 2d gets mixed into the 3d is ☹️☹️☹️ my artist heart is squeeling everytime i see a scene like that. Like when Ladybug spins her yoyo:( its so pretty like COME ON how can you not appreciate that.
At first the only gripe i had with s6 was that they took away even what was left of Adriens personality. As someone whose rewatched the show a couple of times and is rewatching it rn aswell, its insane how much Adrien has changed. S1 and S6 are completely different people change my mind. He used to be so witty and sarcastic just overall a tiny prick behind closed doors. Now hes a little bit bland. But i read a post about Astruc saying the only person he has rn is Marinette, and thats why his personality is centered around her. Which makes a lot of sense but i dont think that transition was well shown, altho i have hopes the remaining episodes will build up to that. It was obvious to me hes traumatized and sad why wouldnt he be, he has no family left ??? But at the same time now he feels like just a side character. Alas, i understand in order to flesh out other characters and the story arc he has to be put in the backround for now. Just kinda bummed we don’t get to see much of him anymore.
Don’t get me started about Chat Noir ☹️ i miss him so much. But again i know why they’re doing it, they’re seperating Ladybug of her only support system. They’re trying to tie Marinette to Adrien and how the guilt with that lie is to be carried alone. Even when Alya found out she was faced witht he consequences: no one likes to be lied to. She cant tell Chat now, especially now that theres an obvious drift between Chat and her. It’s not just them against the world anymore, theres a whole team there now. Altho, this just makes her even more alone. Feeling alone with people around~ again, the moment this all comes to a boil, there’ll be 20 people around her, looking at her like shes the one to blame. Chat noir wont be there next to her anymore, hell be on the otherside looking at her, (feeling more betrayed than anyone there), trying to figure out who she is (not her identity, he just doesnt know Ladybug anymore, they dont talk, they dont interact, theres no us anymore, she made that decision alone-). It just isolates Marinette even further. My baby:(
I disagree with people who say Marinette lost her character development. In FACT id say what the shows doing rn is the best its ever done at showing actual internal battles. Its always been just a kids show so of course they couldnt go for a darker route or something that shows moral issues and heavy decisions. Little things like how they interact with their environment. Up to this point the story was focused on Marinette and her every day life usually a silly problem came up that was sort of solved in just a single episode, usually in the last 2 minutes of it. Now i feel like the whole entire episode is centered around the issue and its actually giving Marinette space to feel. For the viewer to experience the worry the anxiety WITH Marinette. Not just jumping between a silly problem in the city and Marinette doing god knows what. Shes just a baby now:( finally looking and acting like a kid, 14 and worrying about her boyfriends reaction to her sneezes. While simultaniously struggling with guilt over a lie that feels too heavy for a 14 year old. Her control issues isnt using Ladybug for her personal battles which felt just funny up this point but an actual anxious issue and her trying to make everything work on her own and keeping the peace for her own sake. Like if this ISNT character development (not in the usual way just simply the way its shown) then idk what it is. Shes feeling!!! Look at her guys shes showing fear, anxiety, anger, insecurity!! Im jot saying she didnt up to this point but it was shown so much less. Just little tibits. Now shes finally in the spotlight. Good for her!!
Last but not least my theory for Lila: i think shes gathering info (duh). Figuring out who is who in the class, obviously suspecting Marinette is Ladybug but having no actual proof for it. London special showed she couldn’t confirm her suspicion but she HAD the suspicion. Because when she did figure it out and see it was Marinette she wasn’t surprised. And how all the victims are obviously tied to her in her personal life, and how the villian itself has always been connected to her moral issue in one way or another. Lilas a good manipulator that way, knowing which buttons to push. I think shes just trying to break Marinette in.
Cant wait what else is there!!! Mwuah love this show
#miraculous#miraculoustalesofladybugandcatnoir#miraculous lb#mlb season 6#marinette dupain cheng#lila rossi#adrien agreste#chat noir#character study#thoughts#miraculous season 6#mlb marinette#miraculous marinette
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ive had enough of dating bring me back to my yaoi-dom
#me: its not possible to meet the right person in two dates#karma: idk seems right to me#my dude friend being like how r u getting so many dates#to how do u have the emotional capacity for these dates#and im like the same energy i bring into art#can be applied to anything where rng is involved#i mean i had what felt like a right person wrong time situation so early on#that since then ive just been like#the litmus test is really do i care if we dont go exclusive asap#and i think if the answer is no and the answer is very frequently no….#anyway thats my irl life#threes been dating with the energy of a woman post divorce#i think the worst if im ranting was the guy going u dont want kids and im unsure and that put me off#WHAT IF U DECIDE U DONT WANT KIDS#or what if in a year I end up moving to the east coast bc thats where all my friends are#or what if im actually fine with ldr bc all my online friendships are completely over text anyway#but idk if ur okay with that and u wont have this discussion even#like what if the only thing i really need in any relationship is sustained conversation for 10-15 minutes 3 times a day?#OR WHAT IF IN 5 YEARS I DO WANT KIDS#OR IM UNSURE#OR ITS VERY PARTNER DEPENDENT#most insane tag rant ive given on this acct
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why do i love the conflict more than anything else . the misery . the incompatibility that spreads like oil slick . wanting so desperately for resolution that never comes . hmmm
#its the allure of like . mismatch btwn right person / wrong time . maybe in personal development and such#or wrong person / right time and trying 2 make it work but the circumstances are set 2 separate you#i think the guilt ford harbors over his relationship w fidds is good and i think hes had a lot of reflection . 30 yrs at least#but i dont rly care for like a . HELPP SRY IM LIKE talking to myself#i dont rly care ‘if’ they got back tgether in the end#fanon wise or whagever obviouslyy . no avrually emma-may kicking fidds out over the xmas thing its over HELPPPP#i feel like i always hve to clarify bc then theres that one guy whos like ‘smth smth you cant read . ooc loser .’idgaf . not gaffing today#i think mcguckets decision to forgive him is rly sweet And i do like the recognition of .. the whole incident being a misstep on both their#parts ykwim ? like ford was an ass for sureee but also mcgucket + memory gun was his own autonomous detriment#but#no i cant read the other tags i was writing i forgot where i was at#anyways im so obsessed w like . this being such an imperfect event with imperfect equals#ford theory and fidds the mechanics . which brw im also obsessed w how That is revered in canon .#but yeah like imperfect event imperfect people who shared an incredible connecfion in my freaking mind#that was ultimately squandered to fords pride and fidds reticence#ugh like i love the rise and fall i love the strenght of their connection generally corroding over time#its just such a cool motivator for both themselves and like its a history they share together and post weirdmageddon get to finally think a#knowing now what they didnt have the tools to recognize then#idk.^__^ they r so crazy to me . playing w them like dolls in my head#fiddleford mcgucket#stanford pines#gravity falls#every time i think ab this wrt every challeneged dynamic i think ab mars in the discord#talking ab x and y charas epic divorce arc#and im not even saying this to discredit Good relationships in media#bc those have a wealth of fun and interesting concepts or dynamics to dive into#its just something ab like . poetry of anger bro . and how love and hate can feel so similar and be borne from the same place#how one can transform into the other and back again due to . idk whatevee the hell theyve got going on^#prev post got me wishing we had more meat to the fallout#or that it was extended in content or scope . i want 2 see how they dealt with losing the other and then
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HELLOOOO HOUSE GUEST NATION!!! WHO's excited to become consumed by the toxic yuri...........
In front of her is a new teddy bear bought on impulse.
I KNOW WHAT U R........
She endearingly looks at it and pretends to share her food with the toy. It reminded her of...somebody. Somebody who did notice the mountain of dolls in the bedroom's floor and lounge chair.
WEEEEHHH i know what u r....... (u who is drawn 2 that familiarity ...)
"It's okay. Sam, there's spicy tuna and eggs on the counter if you'd like. I'll clear up space on the coffee table for you." Julianne hums.
i smile beeg and wide whenever they have domestic moments like these. whag if u put 2 vewy boken people together, that shouldnt be able to work together, but they do. they do work together....
She suddenly realizes that she forgot to hide the bew teddy bear. She shuffles around quickly so Sam wouldn't notice.
HEFALP ME EVEN SHE KNOWS WHAT SHE IS !!!
A Spartan to her Athenian, their preferences clashed harshly but the fluff was growing on Sam like moss.
WHAT I BE JUST SAYING DAWG!! well, not really. but sorta!!!
Sam expected herself to become desensitized to her antics but annoyance is a masked concern, and her partner needs a bit of reminding to be careful with her adult money.
LOL its the way she dont get it..... lmfao. yeh. SHE MAY GAF BUT DOES SHE UNDERSTAND??? YK?????
Maybe she wishes she had that same innocence at 25, but times were different.
U kno as I was reading the sections before this, describing how immature julienne's room is. i paused and thought: Does Sam often wishes she could be a little girl again? happy & free like that? Maybe not exactly, but somewhere along the lines of that.
id imagine that she only realized something was wrong in her teen years (as most of us do), so im thinking her amusement is some semblance of "It's nice that one of us can be like this."
Or, idk, maybe this rounds back to that guilt I wus talking about last fic. Sam's deep down guilt that she knows she's not good enough for Julienne—objectively, not insecurely—and her letting Julienne run free is her way of making up for it. IDK. im not coherent rn. so embarrassing.....
"Julianne I'm not buying you any more, but that thing almost spoke to me and I'd lose sleep over not getting to get it, so don't expect more."
COGNITIVE EMPATHY MENTION !!!!!!!! she wud've never done this if she hadnt seen julienne done it first weeeeh gweeeeeeh bweeeeeeeeeeh sobbing
🧸No, That's Not An Excuse🧸
A shorter, fluffier fic. Sam is always submissive to her cat's whims.
Julianne's apartment doesn't speak well to her age. It's soft, round, erased of any edge decorated with a warm coat and decoration. It's uniquely colored and lit, relying on lamps and natural light to illuminate the tiny diorama home. At night the tv glows white as Julianme eats dinner on the short coffee table. She's accompanied by a few guests. On her couch in place of throw pillows are stuffed versions of fish. A mackarel, a salmon, and a swordfish fight for space on the sofa. Julianne eats spicy tuna and eggs on themed bowls decorated with faces of cartoon princesses and fairies. In front of her is a new teddy bear bought on impulse. A Japanese mascot plush she found at a thrift shop that looked particularly charming is added to her ever-growing hoard of strange treasures. The bedroom is already overflowing with soft animals and strange objects on legs and tonight a new one joins them.
The teddy bear had more cartoonish proportions. It was fuzzy but it was sewn with a felt-like cloth of a single, unchanging color. It had a white round belly, yellow paws, and a white, short snout. The bear's cartoon eyes were closed, looking dissatisfied or annoyed. It was just too funny to pass up on. She endeariny looks at it and pretends to share her food with the toy. It reminded her of...somebody. Somebody who did notice the mountain of dolls in the bedroom's floor and lounge chair.
Click.
"Doughface, I'm home."
Julianne walks to the doorway and greets her partner with a hug. She stays in the embrace for a little longer then painfully lets go.
"Sorry I'm late. Had to do inventory tonight."
"It's okay. Sam, there's spicy tuna and eggs on the counter if you'd like. I'll clear up space on the coffee table for you." Julianne hums. She suddenly realizes that she forgot to hide the bew teddy bear. She shuffles around quickly so Sam wouldn't notice. She gathers her dirty bowl on a tray she towed under the table and hides the bear under in its place.
Sam has grown to accept such an odd quirk in their apartment. Julianne revered her passion and direction as much as she could leaving the paint unaltered and letting the wood shine through with the right colored rugs and garnishes. She never painted over any of the prime trademarks of her carpenter's design but customization was a priority to the maximalist artist. A Spartan to her Athenian, their preferences clashed harshly but the fluff was growing on Sam like moss. It's nothing she could change. It's in Julianne's nature.
But she notices. Sam picks up the plush mirror while Julianne prepares her her dinner. She grimaces, then smirks; This is such a funny plush. Too bad it's the FIFTH funny plush this week. She doesn't know of there's more. Sam expected herself to become desensitized to her antics but annoyance is a masked concern, and her partner needs a bit of reminding to be careful with her adult money.
"Hey, I got some flavored beer in the minifridge. Do you want anyth...hing...?"
Julianne's ears fold as she's frozen in place. She grins. Oh no.
"Julianne..."
"Yes, Honey?"
"How much is rent this month?" Sam squints her eyes as she smiles- provoking the poor cat.
"...Four Hundred and Seventy...point-twenty..?"
Julianne stiffly sets down a bowl of hot rice and tuna served in floral dishes. She places a glass with strawberry prints on them next to it, filling it with lemon-honey beer. She watches as the bear eats, her soul wanting to leave its body. She squeezes her plush as the minutes pass.
"Julianne." Sam finally breaks the tension. She turns to her, repositioning herself to appear less tense.
"Yeah. I know...it's just-!!"
"What? You have to give me a very good reason."
Julianne's cheeks turn red. She puts the plush up next to Sam's face.
"He looks just like you when you're mad!" The cat laughs.
"Is that it!"
"Yes! Yes! Look! The resemblance is too uncanny!" Julianne falls back on the ground and laughs. She drowns out her guilt with the sound as she reaches for another breath. But it is true- her apartment now looks like a little girl's bedroom. So colorful. So soft. So immature. But it's just the way she likes it. Nice and cozy; Surrounded by trinkets that remind her of her favorite people.
"Julianne, that's not a very good excuse."
Her reaction isn't as explosive as she anticipated. Just annoyed. Sam thinks these impulsive buys are unreasonable but the felt wraps around her now. It's simply..funny now...She'll humor her as long as she has the patience to. She can't bring herself to really scold the younger woman. Maybe she wishes she had that same innocence at 25, but times were different. Julianne is soft and she needs soft things to survive her edged world. The cat has only proven she could melt her down to her sensitivity, so, she's forgiving her again. For Now.
"And just so you know, I won't be buying you any more plushies from now on. Got that?"
Julianne pouts but obediently nods.
"My money, my choiceee..." She hisses.
.
.
Julianne's interests still follow her around. Suddenly from the corner of her eye, she spots a Hello Kitty sticker sheet by a bookstore window. Then as she drives past a boulevard, she notices balloons in the shape of the bear mascot she bought. There are cute, sugary donuts molded as characters at a chain donut shop. Then after her monthly reset, a flea market takes place on an empty parking lot. The bear curiously walks in, windowshopping through people's trunkload of clothes, appliances, and memorabilia. There was a coat that would have been too big for Julianne but perfect for her in all kinds of colors, but who dresses that way? There's a lamp that's got a mosaic of a swan near lily pads. The bulbs smell rotten. Children fight shoulder to shoulder by this mountain of small toys near a spread of stuffed animals. She was going to ignore the spread until the seller brought out a medium-sized plush of a cat wearing a strawberry hat. It was in great condition with big doe eyes, a peach nose, and orange patches. It wasn't exactly like Julianne but it was close. Before she could resist, she already met eyes with the woman displaying it. There seemed to be women in the same age group as Julianne closeby. There literally was no time to waste now.
Sam could not forgive herself for spending $15 on such a funny thing.
.
.
But then again, this wouldn't be just silly to Julianne. She'll promise her life to you if you gifted her something so big. She's going to brag about it. Julianne loves these small surprises and the stoic seems to still fall victim to the whims of a childlike artist. Inside a white plastic bag is a cat doll wearing her favorite fruit. Sam reassures herself: she's the best girlfriend ever, if that will mean anything to her now.
Instead of bringing out her copy of the apartment keys, Sam knocks on Julianne's door and holds her breath. Now it seems like the tables have turned.
"Wait, I'm here now..." Julianne peeks the door open, hiding half of herself from the hallway, "Heya, forgot your keys?"
"Damnit, yeah. Left them in my truck."
Her arms are folded behind her back. Julianne curiously tries to take a peek. She giggles.
"Hey, do you want me to hold it for you?"
"Just sit on the couch. I just want to tell you something important."
The cat obeys, leaning on the left side while cuddling a salmon doll. She smiles politely as her patience is running thin.
"I think..you want this. Can you close your eyes please?"
Julianne hums and shuts them quickly. Her feet patter on the rug, drumming in anticipation and mystery. She's always receptive to a nice treat, whatever it is. Something soft is laid on her thighs and her hands feel to confirm what it is. It is!
"Uh..open your eyes now..so..what do you think..?"
The cats eyes expand with excitement and adoration staring back at the toy cat in her hands. She's immediately enamoured by the details and the pattern of the doll, feeling its high quality fabric and faux fur, tight beautiful embroidery, and small prints. Then her big eyes look up to her girlfriend who looks similarly bashful and red.
"Didn't you say.."
"Julianne I'm not buying you any more, but that thing almost spoke to me and I'd lose sleep over not getting to get it, so don't expect more."
"Don't get so defensive." Julianne purrs. She gives Sam a tight, warm hug again. Her tail curls around the both of them as she prolongs it. She brings the cat plush next to her own face.
"Does it look like me?"
"No brown patches...But it's wearing a strawberry hat."
"But it does..?"
The bear nods with a warm small smile. She pets the plush's strawberry hat.
"Do..you have a name in mind yet?"
She can't resist making Julianne happy however she emotionally can.
"Harper!"
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underrated funny thing about lawlight is they never actually did get to confirm that 100% of the time they were basically thinking exactly what the other person thought they were thinking every single time
#im thinking about this because of the relationship i have with one of my bosses#like hes extremely hard to read and doesnt make small talk but hes also considerate in quiet ways#so im always like guessing what hes thinking and feeling and wondering if hes trying to do the same back#but then im like am i just projecting onto him completely? making this all up in my head#hes giving nothing and im imagining everything. and you really dont want to make assumptions because it would be awkward to be wrong#for example a few times now things that i wondered if he was doing to make my life easier were actually just things he was doing#because he was secretly preparing to close up shop#so i was glad i never voiced my appreciation for his thoughtfulness out loud to him when i found out the truth lol#ANYWAYS unlike in my situation#the entire time whenever one of those two thinks one thing the other one is like 'i bet he's thinking this' and we the readers#look between their thought bubbles and go 'pffft he sure is what are you gonna do now'#its probably a good thing they went to mu because the afterlife couldn't handle all the smug sex theyd be having on every available surface#24/7/365#lawlight#p
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this nemesis ambition started out a little slow but I am getting closer to finding that bastard who killed my wife, and I’ll not rest a minute now that im far closer to on his trail
sorry got in character for a second
Anyways fun ambition so far very fucked up though
congratulations on joining the murder club anon!!!! depending on who you ask the name refers to either people who have murdered or people who have witnessed murder. usually both. actually extremely often both. it's a swell time you'll feel right at home (don't mind our collective skyglass knife collection in the back)
#im still not far into nemesis personally but im very much enjoying it#honestly in a weird way it feels like it's moving faster than HD did. which. is funny bc nemesis is like The gated behind item grinds quest#idk. HD was a fun slowburn where we adventured around gathering our rogues gallery before the action kicked in#nemesis on the other hand feels like im picking up halfway through a batman serial#fallen london#ask#it's WAY more fucked up right off the bat than HD was. honestly ive thought abt red honey for ages. that's so fucked up#and we LEAD with that?? Okay#definitely a horrors-filled ambition befitting caeru (the guy who's constantly going through horrors)#it really encourages you to get fucked up and freaky and in ur character's headspace at basically every step along the way#i only have HD to compare it too but HD was like. a lot more interpretative in comparison? at least to me. that's what it felt like#and i adore HD for that dont get me wrong here#HD just also waited until like. halfway through before it asked what the scoundrel actually Wanted out of its heart's desire#nemesis in comparison is right off the bat who died? who are you mourning? anguish. justice. there must be vengeance.#it's a delightfully different vibe!! i like it!!!#oh god sorry anon im doing the classic yin talking way too much in the tags thing again#i havent had much excuse to talk abt nemesis and what i think of it so far and of course its rp effects on caeru#but i do have a handful of thoughts on it#it's good. im liking it so far. it's starting very strong if nothing else. and i have no spoiler knowledge of what happens in the future#beyond the choice between rewards at the very end#and im SO curious how we'll get to that point. what horrors will we adventure through next? off we go to find out!#it's biggest glaring weakness so far is how horrendously grindy it is. and like. ive been warned and done my research ahead of time#im doing it on the same account im seeking. i knew what i was getting into. but also gots damn.#in comparison HD's 5-card lodgings and dreamgate feel like footnotes#anyway while im already way too deep into rambling did you know the honey trip gives you fate?? insane. why does it do that. hilarious even
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you know, i always find it really funny when dudebros complain about syndicate and odyssey being too "jokey" or not "taking its characters seriously" or whatever…
like, did y'all collectively sleep through "it's-a me, mario!", "i meant besides vaginas", ezio inventing the latte, bartolomeo's... just... *gestures vaguely* entire character, etc?
like, it's fine to have preferences of course, i myself prefer a more serious and grounded tone, but these are usually the same people who tout the ezio trilogy as "peak assassin's creed", call ac1 a glorified tech demo and hate on connor for being "too serious and boring", like? make it make sense!
#asscreed#ac syndicate#ac odyssey#dont get me wrong#i do have problems with syndicate and even more so with odyssey#but it's not the tone lol#honestly i think kassandra is the protagonist that's the most similar to ezio if you really think about it#but bc she's a woman she's suddenly 'overpowered' and 'unrealistic'#yall don't remember the insane things that ezio survives in revelations do you#speaking of which#been replaying the ezio games lately#and i have something to confess...... i really don't think ac2 is good#ac brotherhood was a BIG improvement#in terms of story pacing for one (none of those insane unmotivated time jumps... well aside from the strange montage at the end)#and the characters are a lot more fleshed out (probably bc there aren't like 20 of them)#and the handling of female characters is MUCH less egregious#maybe bc there's only really claudia and caterina left LOL#lucrezia is a little annoying i guess... but she gets a pass bc she's cesare's sister and really they're the same kind of crazy lol#and hey we actually get to see how dangerous sex work can be and how it's not just a way for sexy nuns to give inner peace to men#even cristina gets fleshed out!#and i like that we get so see ezio being a little bit of a selfish prick in her missions#and making bad decisions in interpersonal relationships#at least i THINK that's what we're supposed to take away from it... but who knows maybe it's just supposed to be a tragic love story...#i hope not.... i hope the player IS supposed to think that ezio's treatment of her is bad. otherwise.... :/#sorry for rambling#guess im just kinda surprised by how much i enjoyed brotherhood#it had been a long time since i last played it#also the modern day is really good!#that you can talk so much to everyone and also being able to read their emails and the mundane banter... idk i just think its neat :)
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i think i'm just fundamentally evil and broken ?
#went on a walk#it's so sad outside#i listened to the latest mitski album twice and i was on the verge of tears the entire time#i guess i thought time did heal old wounds but maybe ignoring and avoiding the wounds is not the same as healing them#im having thoughts and feelings that im so ashamed of#i dont feel like theres anyone i can tell this to im just afraid it'll change how they perceive me forever#im not even sure how to explain things to myself#am i normal am i wrong#all i want is to curl up into my bed and have someone take care of me#but i can't do that i need to grow up and there are things to do and i can't have everything i want always#i'll try and work on this assignement for thirty or forty five minutes or something and then ill allow myself to curl up into a ball and cr#or maybe i'll knit and watch something and get myself busy bc thats what i do#i just avoid the uncomfortable parts of myself thinking theyll go away or something#it's the greed#it's the greed.
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crying whenever i talk about Cookie9 because all my friends have these interesting and unique theories on them while i take everything too literally and they all just stare at me like “dude… uuugh we r TIRED” <-they dont actually say this they are very kind to me but i can Feel It
#my version of them is centered around their blog version with the ‘personality’ of their steam review and like a bunch of HC#i developed them with the implication that they’re Real but i’m a bit iffy on it#because all my friends have theories about how they’re from the narrator’s consciousness which is sick as hell#and i’m unsure how to actually structure everything or if i should go the same route so i can get approval from them </3#my friends r the real reviewer fans even though they dont plague themselves over them every day and im so sad that i don’t know anythinggg#gggggggggggg#like im p sure they genuinely hate the stuff i make about cookie9 and im just. scrumbles myself. sorry im Trying :( i’m not smart#or good at writing or even media literate#whatever that term means#all i have is love in my heart for them i don’t know anything at all#ouhghghhg they hate It so much but i cant do anything else and it’s all i have#like all my cookie9 stuff works on the ‘what if their blog self Was Real’ but i’m not actually sure how to fit it all into my actual parabl#stuff because i still havent worked out how my parable itself works#and people probably don’t think i know enough and i don’t think they’ll approve if i try. so i Don’t#tempted to blame this on my like. general crushing lack of intelligence caused by both physical and mental reasons#but i want to believe i could do better if i try? but that’s incredibly hopeful#i’ll be stuck here forever i think#<-guy who. whenever Anything wrong happens ever. just goes back to ‘oh yeah its because im dumb as fuckign rocks. due to the Incidents’#i am very scared of the possibility that it is possible for me to be anything more because that implies that i’m stupid because i didnt try#even though i’m trying very very fucking hard and every time i get something wrong way more than anyone else i’ve ever known#and they hate me for it . MAN!!!!!!!!!#<-brain is lying 2 me i think nobody hates me or . whatever. it still feels like it though im just saying this because i dont want anyone t#think people genuinely hate me for being stupid. i mean. people DO. but not my friends ☝️#man i can’t even get into the buglivia crap either because she is so abstracted from her actual review#girl w identity issues and also the general normal Changing A Lot Through Time. i scrumble her. around#her Self during 2018 would in fact be in character for the review.i want to draw her during that time. she took everything so seriously </3#tbh my version of her does react well to TSP humor but at the time she felt like she wasn’t allowed 2 Do Her Thing and tried to seem#more professional and Normal and it seeped into EVERYTHING for a bit#cookie9 though just genuinely found the narrator annoying and patronizing. its just not his thing and thats fine#<-random nonsensechemical reviewer bits hidden inside the vents. SEND POST.
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zeno's ultimate pokemiku tierlist ⁉️(it's all his opinion and he loves them all regardless⁉️)
#like arrfgggdiakaktmcksmsama this was literally all for me like they knew what they were doing#i love character design i love pokemon i love miku. and then you put ALL THREE TOGETHER....#i will explain some of my choices here#poison miku is just too good but also i am a big sucker for freaky scientists with constant “worry” eyebrows#her design is just so out there and crazy (this is about the shoes. some understand the greatness of the shoes and some dont. and thats ok.)#every other miku in peak i think establishes their theme exeptionally well especially ghost bug and fighting#for ghost i already love spooky and gloomy looking characters and that miku delivers tenfold (of course shes designed by the GOAT take)#esp with the mix of ghostly and electronic/digital regarding the glitchy parts n the 01 hologram#she looks like shell invade my computer and give it a virus if i dont send the chainmail about her tragic file corruption to 10 friends#(in the best way possible)#for bug miku the big dress is a huge plus but also i just think shes adorable nuff said#for fighting - i love a delinquent character and she fits that really well. the half coat thing is a big highlight for me#also the leek theme is absolutely iconic#for the ones i didnt like as much - i honestly just think the koraidon one is a leeeeetle bit boring#dont get me wrong. it has really cool aspects like the hair and the koraidon like cape but idk#it feels like theres a lot going on but not that much at the same time? its still a really nice design tho esp the hair color#for the ones in yellow tier - i just dont like the color palletes very much . theyre still really nice designs esp fire miku#but all in all these are genuinely all amazing designs and i dont want to be too critical or mean to any of them esp seeing im not a pro#but this was really fun to see unfold!!! cant wait until the songs start dropping#in the topic of miku as well - hey muse dash where's my miku on the switch version....#please dont make us wait too long 🙏🏿🙏🏿🙏🏿
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i wanna post my skip to loafer art but i cant do it knowing ppl are gonna put it on tiktok and pinterest bc itd be like. bringing an invasive species ykwim
#my meds just kicked in so im feeling talkative but truly idk how to explain it#its like. with anything else id be more than happy to introduce it to ppl like monkie kid and mp100. witch hat maybe but its personal to me#but skip to loafer is special to me. and i feel bad for saying this bc other ppl do deserve to watch smth they will enjoy#hell the reason i got into it was bc my friend was kind enough to lend me her copy and i got hooked#its so ironic im saying this esp given how insecure i am abt depicting characters wrong. but i really dont want to look thru the tags#and see them on a 'can i copy your homework' tier list. or ppl getting mad abt why egashira mitsumi and shima cant just be a throuple#its just!! i wont stop you if thats how you like to engage with the show or how you interpret it bc ill just ignore it and leave u alone!!#and theres no objective wrong way of doing it!! and i know that interacting with the work is what forms a community after all!!#but keeping it tight knit is just easier for me bc nobody has to worry abt making each other laugh and we can enjoy it for what it is#fully aware im saying this as someone whos drawn monkie kid art with text post memes and owl house draw the squad templates#but at the same time i just. dont want to explain myself or give ppl reasons why shima and mitsumi are ace coded just bc it 'feels right'#fandom is a communal thing and it feels so hypocritical thinking this. too many conflictng thoughts that idk what to act on#yapping
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been trying to work on my object show a little more and honestly at this rate i wont be able to finish the first episode for at least a few years if ever 😭
#i rewrite the script and then i get super busy and cant work on it for a while then i suddenly get motivation and i rewrite the script and t#and every time i think about it i make it a little bit more about psychology and the human condition#which makes me want to finish some of my textbooks before i even finish the script#im also trying to flesh out the hosts a little more because ive come to the conclusion that the entire show revolves around them actually#and BECAUSE of that i really really really need to get into their heads because if i cant map out their thought processes#then the pieces will never fit together#but AUGH at the same time i might just be making things too complicated and im scared to actually be done with it#which i am but still#but AUGH i need to do more research i wanna dig into what being in an object show does to a person#how would having to do those challenges and constantly losing your friends really affect you#i know hfjone really got into it but i really really wanna go further#i also really really really need to work more on the hosts i need them to be believable teenagers that dont know what theyre doing#theyre petty theyre dumb theyre reckless and they have their own issues that theyre constantly projecting onto the contestants#they both have their own way of thinking and theyre both trying to get into the heads of the contestants and theyre both wrong#so i gotta ACTUALLY get into their heads and then make up what the creators would THINK is in their heads#am i making any dang sense i still have the flu and i think the medicines finally kicking in
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If you annoy people for fun, don't be surprised when people don't like you
Work rant in tags. Didn't know there was a 30 tag limit lol
#one of the people in my department is sick so we pulled a out of department coworker to do her shift today#she is !! so annoying !!#doesnt do anything right doesnt take anything seriously thinks she knows what to do better than the people whove been there daily (ME.#im not going to make sandwiches 10 minutes before the lunch rush are you kidding me)#anyway. shes got 4 grown kids and has this job to fill her time (left 40 minutes early) and specifically told the evening shift that she#makes it a challenge to annoy people. for fun.#'teehee i put the spoons away head up cause [vic] doesnt like it and [they] put it back immediately' its not a prank when it violates-#food safety. and also it is literally making more work for me. i worked 2 hours with her and im exhausted today. i only have 4 hour shifts#literally like. puts nothing in the right space does nothing correctly or finishes something in one go leaves the Strangest messes#put me on my autistic back foot (the hotcase is supposed to be the same everyday. for us AND the customers. no one knows where anything is!!#regulars come in and glance at it to see if we have their things in there and theyre just walking away cause its in the wrong spot!!)#anyway. she made me do the donut pull and didnt dump her trash and also put the oven waxpaper on the trays in the sink.#and told me to Not clean the meat slicer cause ill need to use it for sandwiches (the cooler that we put our sandwich stuff in broke 2 weeks#ago so we are low on space everywhere and are trying to keep everything to a minimum. there were 3 tubs of meat sliced AND ALSO IT WAS 10.#MINUTES. TO RUSH. IM NOT MAKING SANDWICHES CARRIE. THERES LIKE 5 ALREADY OUT THERE I MADE YESTERDAY.)#srry she like implied-asked me to make some like 3 times while i was literally cleaning her mess.#i cant work in that kitchen if every surface is cluttered i will clean it before making a Bigger Mess.#anyway. she only works over here if someone is sick enough to call out w no cover which is like maybe once every 4 months so#she doesnt know how to do things. which would be fine if she recognized that. she does the hot case so wrong yall.#its usually [burritos; stick items; boat items] [corndogs; strips; (boat items or fries)] [fried chicken; (space or fries] [bakes chicken;#special of day and fries after its gone; space/special part 2 or fries] [sweet corn; mashed potato; mac n cheese; two kinds of gravy]#its mever that when she works even tho its NEVER DIFFERENT.#today it was [baked chicken; strips x2] [baked chicken 2; special;boats?] [fried chicken; fries] [corn dogs;burritos; CORN.] [STICKS.; mac#;mashed potato; gravys]#WHY DOES SHE MOVE THE CORN. ITS ALWAYS THE CORN. EVERYTHING ELSE MOVES AROIND BUT WHY IS THE CORN BOT IN THE ROW WITJ THE OTHER SIDES.#it bothers me so much but i cant Move things cause its a mess and its hot and i have mire important things to do like CLEAN HER MESS.#ugh. anyway she talked rrally hushed to the evening shift and i thinj he reassured her that im just like this (quiet/bad at talking) and do#like her and like. lmao. i dont but she doesnt need to know that. i was too overwhelmed by figuring out wtf she was doing to figure out to#talk to her#anyway (thats the third anyway i need to stop) she called me mellow so at least my stress wasnt showing too much
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i fear the 'surely someone's gonna save me' in sunshine baby has an incredible chokehold on me
#this Can't be the energy going into 2025 sighs#sabs speaks#lowkey had like four different meltdowns today over plans being changed and its like. can we be normal#and then my brain had the audacity to be like ur lying.#like girl what the fuck?? in what world are we doing this for fun#and then do u guys know the horror story of like vampire slumbering just have my headphones on genuinely vampire like and out of NOWHERE my#sister is just above me like Hi.#can u fix this dress for me#like in what world do u wake me up like that girl#i fixed the dress but still like. let me live#times like these im considering dropping out truly having that moment over u need to chill out before the stress kills you before the thing#that's supposed to has a chance#if this all seems disconjointed its because it is and is not hope this helps <3#i also want nothing more than to write about my blorbos but i saw people being wrong about them and now im like shit. maybe im wrong about#them#so i cant do it without feeling insane for that reason and for the second reason that i have other obligations#i think it should be illegal for education to give u things to do over the holidays they dont understand how much guilt i will feel not#getting things done and instead feeling horrific and not resting#i also think learning too much about my health has caused me to spiral a lot like the dr's being so chill about it whilst im in debilitatin#pain is not good for me actually. and has triggered the disability grief all over again#having my pmdd and my menstruation at the same time genuinely i felt like female hysteria and im scared for the next one#its a wonder i did Not do It#a little morbid i guess but i have Morbid hormone disorder shrugs#anyways. 2025 be better i hope#so scared to pull my cards for the year#less actually scared and more like. i dont knowww how much i have it in me to be brave anymore#congrats if u made it this far but mostly sorry to my scorpio rising
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loveee when a character is crushed under the weight of someone elses expectations for them love when a character dedicates their entire life to something they never even wanted for themself love when the only reason a character keeps going is because theyre Supposed to and bc theyre supposed to make another person happy/proud. YES !!! CLAPPING !!! YES !!!!!!!!
#this isnt rly related to any character in particular i just thought abt this and it made me scream.#flirting at a bar Damn girl you look like youre trapped in a life you built to please someone else. and then i kneel down and pull out a 💍#sry i ran out of space for the full word ring. also why when i type 💍 Ohh theyre hiding it. bc now the emoji is 💍 Oh they changed it again#pox on their home..originally it was 🔐 sughested emoji#but then the second time it was 😭.... very anti marriage. well ig maybe the sob could be like OMG... YES!!!!! I WILL MARRY YOU!!!!!!#ngl getting proposed to is such a big fear of mine like. i dont think id ever be able to propose to someone so id have to be proposed to i#suppose but it makes me quite nervous not bc im like ohh nooo dont propose i just rly worry ill react the wrong way and theyll change their#mind. like its a very high emotion moment so ik i would be supposed to be emotional And i would be but idk if id do it in the right way . y#idk. what if my autism looms and i end up just being like 😐 on accident. fuckkk. what if i say somethinf dumb. like i try to be like YES !#but instead im like YEP! god. can you imagine. id have to just bury myself at that point. so embarassing. or like what if i get excited and#flap my hands but it was supposed to be more of a like. joyful crying type of thing... or what if im supposed to just be shocked and like .#Oh my god ....#and am I supposed to run at them and sweep them into a hug or do they do thst to me. UGH. ITS SO STRESSFUL. i suppose ill just remain alone#forever so I never have to confront any difficult situations ever again . Joke .#idk it just makes me nervous. but i suppose hopefully the person proposing to me will love me . that would be nice so hopefully they wont#mind if i dont respond the right way . and they wont be upset with me bc they love me eversomuch. a girl can dream i suppose... my head lik#is pounding sry. i need to sleep probably.. stayed up too late again -_- 8am -_- and im sposed to do laundry today But i dont want to . and#since im gonna fall asleep i fear it shant happen. UGHHH#wtvr. idk what my ideal proposal would be likeee. i don't want to be blindsided ig#i like surprises but Obviously im too worried abt like. my immediate reaction#+ i think its important to talk abt marriage Before proposing just so everybodys like#on the same page and such. Obvs... but ya. i dont think id want a super public proposal like. id like it to be somewhere nice with maybs#significance to our relationship and such. and its fine if theres like Some passersby but id hate for it 2 be like. somewhere crowded. or i#a restaurant or something#Altho if it was in a restaurant maybe we could get free food..#but maybe that can be just fake proposals later on. and our real proposal can be somewhere else. YIPPEEE. me and my imaginary future spouse#who is To be honest rather bare minimum#normal girl will be like Wistful sigh maybe my future spouse will even love me and wont scream at me and will like to listen to me speak 😍#but anywyas. my beddybye time. SURPRISE GN POST#woahhthis got off topic i forgot what the original post was this always happens. i do love characters like that
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