#but anything to annoy rin? im in

[venusbby]

being rin's roommate had its pros and cons.

he was always quiet, minding his own business. he never really brought any trouble (except the few times he came home with an injury and expected you to let him deal with it himself) and that's what made living with him easier.

but sometimes, just sometimes, it feels like he's been forced to live with you.

you wouldn't say you were overly social or a person who could be friends with anyone they like, but god, every time you talked, rin acted like you were the most uninteresting person ever. when clearly, you were the most chill person on the planet.

exaggeration, yes. but it's not wrong to say that you weren't a loud person. you preferred silence just as much as he did. so why did he look like he's living with a totally different person?

that blank expression, his lips pressed in a straight line and those undeniably pretty lashes of his- as much as you had grown to like the look he always gave you, it was so damn frustrating. always the same stupid look, the look which made your stomach flip even though he didn't smile or show amusement.

you never knew what was going on his head.

eventually, he noticed the effort you put in to be his friend (when all you did was stare at him every time he was doing something, as if to remind him, "stop ignoring me!!! stop. ignoring. me.") and your 'friendship' was finally happening. (he felt a little scared.)

it was all going quite nicely, even though rin was still not that talkative. you knew he was just.. like that. you wouldn't expect him to change his ways. all you wanted was to help him get as comfortable as you were in this apartment, and it definitely worked.

after weeks and weeks of progress, it finally came to a point where rin was so comfortable that he even asked you to join his horror movie marathon.

and it was a big mistake, he realized, when you stood in the doorway of his bedroom with a sheepish look on your face.

"what do you want."

rin's irritated voice made you huff. he was already under his covers, but hadn't slept even though it had been almost an hour after the last movie. you felt incredibly jealous of how warm he must be, shuddering and entering his room without saying a word. a new level of comfortable.

oh, how much you loved his expressions- like how was staring at you like you were a fly that wouldn't leave him alone.

"shut up," you hushed, lifting the covers and climbing into his bed, cutting him off just as he was about to complain, "and move."

now, you laid next to your roommate who had started to consider pushing you off the bed. "this is fucking ridiculous. what the- what are you doing?" he hissed, watching you shift closer and pull the covers over yourself.

you sighed, ignoring him. "that last movie was.. something."

he groaned, staring at the ceiling just like you, avoiding the way your sides touched. "you insisted on watching it all the way, not me."

"yeah, but then i kept seeing that fucking old lady from the movie in the corner of my room. so, now im here."

"we are never doing this again. you hear me?"

"whatever, just let me sleep here tonight. it's 2 AM already, i'll be out of your room by 6."

rin cursed under his breath, turning quickly so that his back was facing you. this bed wasn't even made for two people. he closed his eyes, hoping to drift off as soon as possible so that he could just forget that you were in the same bed as him. there was no way he would let you notice the reason for his frantic movements.

his peace lasted for mere seconds before it was interrupted by the sound of shuffling and the mattress slightly sinking near his side when you wrapped your arm around him.

his eyes shot open and he stilled, hearing you softly apologize, your voice closer to his ear this time.

"i have a habit, sorry."

rin was losing his mind and he wasn't sure if he'd be able to exist tomorrow.

"you're fine." he rushed his words faster than anything, breathing out when you shifted even closer with what sounded like a silent laugh. "just go to sleep, fuck's sake."

there were no more horror movie nights after this, that's for sure. but now rin's got a bigger problem and that is dealing with these stupid feelings he has for you.

he really was losing his mind.

[opens-up-4-nobody]

How controversial is it to not like shikamaru?

[sunascupid]

RED LIGHTS

synopsis: everything looks prettier under red lights, especially your boyfriend. you decide to tell him, and he decides that you’re it for him — all he’s ever wanted.

notes: reader wears lipstick, fluff w some suggestive sprinkled in, inspired by red lights by RINI. warning: too much physical touch as always.

wc: >1.0k

“why do you keep looking at me?” suna peers at you with his celadon eyes, his rings tap against the wheel as he bounces his fingers against the leather.

he's cautious with his words, and maybe a bit curious, too.

“what, i can’t look at my boyfriend?” you look over at him again, probably for the fifth time since you left your apartment parking lot just seven minutes ago.

“is there something on my face?” he quickly runs his hand over his face, peeking at the rare view mirror. and to his surprise, no crumbs. did you maybe leave a lipstick mark when you kissed him before leaving? (komori, to suna’s dismay, has pointed out a mark or two on his cheek as he walked into the gym for morning practices. he always wipes it off with a mumble, but takes a peek in the mirror beforehand to admire your bold proclamation of love).

“you’re just really pretty.”

“oh shut the fuck up," he laughs, and it fills the car, harmonizing with the music from the radio. it brings a smile to your face. it's dark, but you can see that his tongue is poking at his cheek, holding back an equally cheesy smile.

“i’m serious!” you face him again. "your hair looks good today, and you're all clean-shaven." you run the back of your hand against his cheek, humming in satisfaction to emphasize how soft his skin is. "i gotta appreciate this when i can."

Keep reading

[imoncloud7]

wife; suna x reader drabble

notes: cw: mentions of drinking, but that's really it! just a fluffy little drabble im reposting from the other day, following up the angsty post i just made wc: 316

you loved your boyfriend more than anything. you two have been through practically everything together, being childhood friends who began dating in high school, and now current university students. suna knew you inside and out, and you were the same. however, there was one thing your boyfriend did that didn’t necessarily make you upset, but it was just a little bit annoying. 

any time the two of you would go out drinking, he had a bit of a habit of drinking more than he should, which brought consequences. 

“get your hands off my wife, miya.” suna glared at his friend, who had pulled you into an embrace. 

“she’s not yer wife sunarin.” atsumu now pulled away from the hug. 

“bullshit she isn’t.” 

“i don’t see a ring.” suna now grabbed your wrist and pulled you into his chest, causing you to stumble a bit. 

“relax rin, i was just hugging my friend. our friend, mind you.” you spoke,  your voice muffled by suna’s chest. 

“mmm no. you’re mine.” he squeezed you tighter. 

drunk rin just had to let everyone around him know that you were his, specifically telling everybody that you were married, despite that being years away. nights like these always ended the same way as well, back in your shared apartment. 

“rin seriously, you need to stop saying that in front of people.”

“why? you don’t wanna marry me or somethin’?” you two were in the bathroom, his chest pressed against your back and arms wrapped around your middle while you attempted to wash your face. 

“that’s not true, rin. i’d marry you in a heartbeat. but we’re not married yet, and we’re still in university.” 

“yeah yeah, if i got you a ring, would you stop denying it?”

“let’s maybe talk about this in the morning, rin.” you turned around to face him, pulling him in for a kiss. “i love you, y’know.”

[prettyboykatsuki]

WON'T YOU LEND ME YOUR FAITH? | R. ITOSHI

❁ tags ; fem!reader (reader dresses femininely + is referred to as a girl / with she/her pronouns), reader is shorter than rin , strangers to friends to lovers, fluff, getting together, rin is soo teenage boy (and makes some annoying teen-boy comments), slow-burn, making out is as suggestive as this gets, stereotypical shoujo romance, usage of honorifics, coming of age

❁ wc ; 21.4k (insane. most insane thing ive ever seen)

❁ a/n ; i'm genuinely appalled by the length of this fic. how did that happen. what in the world. this fic is truly just. every single shoujou manga trope crammed into one okay. my silly little self indulgent romance !!!!

also this fic is sfw + takes place in their third of hs so im not gonna say mdni that's silly. however if you're a minor please do not follow me i post heinous dark content and this fic is a fluke in the timeline dskffjkfd

❁ synopsis ; the love story of a sensitive, stoic soccer player and an eccentric wannabe journalist

or that time you confess to itoshi rin, knowing he'll reject you, and asking to befriend him in spite of it.

“I like you,” 

A breeze of wind passes.

“What?” 

You confess to Itoshi Rin at the start of the Spring semester. On the school rooftop with your head down. Bent at a near ninety degrees as you hold out what looks like a love letter.

For a minute, he can’t do anything more than stare. He’s received countless confessions in highschool. Half of which he rejected immediately, not even stopping to hear the full extent of their feelings. Why would he? The lukewarm ideas of first love had never been of interest. Even before his fight with Sae, Rin was always focused on his goals. 

After his second year of high school was spent in Bluelock, Rin has only returned for his third. He promised his parents he’d graduate properly, and Bluelock was off-season until Ego could fully prepare for the next stages. 

And a lot has changed since then. But some parts of him, namely his feelings towards the idea of conventional relationships, haven't changed at all. 

It’s only been a little less than three weeks since school had started, and by now he’s received more confessions than he can really remember. All of which he’s rejected coldly, and blankly, because Itoshi Rin has never been in the business of coddling anyone. Most of those girls he’s never even met. Knows nothing about them because they’re first or second years he’d never even spoken to. 

Rin, however, does know you. You’ve been in his class in all 3 years of his highschool, and he’s seen you around more than once. You’re in the newspaper club, which he remembers because you covered their winning match back when Rin was a first year. He wouldn’t call you friends, but you’ve spoken to each other enough that he can remember your name with a little effort. 

He also  remembers you being sort of annoying. You’re one of those loud and earnest types that he can’t stand. 

A year ago, Rin would’ve denied knowing you at all. But now that things with Sae have cleared up just a little - he’s not inclined to take his anger out on you. He knows you. Not well, but enough.

And if his reputation precedes him at all, then you know Rin too. You know that he’s never once gone out with a single girl in his 3 years of highschool and that most of the guys in all three grades consider him an arrogant jerk. You know that he mostly plays soccer alone during breaks and that he only really hangs out with one person. 

Which means you must know that he doesn’t harbor any feelings for you. And that he’s going to reject your confession without thinking twice about it. 

In the first place, he was just curious if you were stupid enough to do it. If you really called him up here for a roof-top confession. The fact that you were is what’s stifling him. Your words are familiar. He’s heard them so many times. But it’s baffling. It’s ridiculous. 

You lift your head to face him. You’re still smiling, though there’s something more there that he can’t understand. He doesn’t do well with people like you begin with. He finds himself backing away when you jog up closer towards him. 

He’s taller than you, he notices. You pick your head up to look at him and smile, toothy and at ease. You hold the letter up again and shove it towards him, though you don’t seem like you’re expecting him to take it. He stares at you. 

“I like you,” You repeat, smooth and bubbly. He frowns. 

“I don’t like you.” 

He has expectations for this part. Normally he receives a saddened look like a dog whose tail he stepped on or a fit of crying (sometimes genuine, sometimes with the intent of guilt.) Sometimes he gets an awkward smile trying to seem unbothered by the whole situation. 

You don’t falter though. You don’t even flinch at the words, cold as ice and steely. It throws him off. 

“I know,” You say back,  prying the letter away from him. You turn the other way, walking towards the metal grates and for a minute Rin wonders if you’re going to do something drastic. You don’t though, instead sticking your the paper in the air “That’s why I have a proposal,” 

He stares, absolutely dumbfounded. You turn again towards him. 

“I want to get to know you. And keep confessing to you,” You say first, and Rin immediately goes to reject you until you put your hands up “And I want you to keep rejecting me.” 

He’s baffled. Really. 

“What?” 

“So I can gradually lose my feelings for you. Nothing that different on your end, honestly..” 

It sounds annoying. It really does. If it were anyone else, under any other circumstance he would scoff and tell them to deal with their own shitty feelings alone just like everyone else. But there’s no hidden intention there. Rin’s always been good at sniffing that out. Your words are pure as can be.

Frustratingly simple and twice as sincere, no matter how confusing the whole thing is. 

“Why should I?” 

“We can be friends,” You reply like it’s the best deal he could ask for. “Isn’t that enough? Not like you really have any right now.” 

He scoffs bitterly albeit he can’t counter you. 

“Friendship is lukewarm. I don’t care about any of that stuff,” 

“Lukewarm? Really? Then..think of it like I’ll be your shield. You hate when people socialize with you right? I’ll help you deal with it.” 

That doesn’t sound too bad actually. On top of that, he’s kind of curious what your deal is. He rolls his eyes at you, turning to face the other way. 

“Do whatever you want. It’s not like it matters.” 

His response makes you beam. He hears you shout from the otherside of the yard, followed by the sound of your footsteps noisily thudding against the concrete as you try to catch up with him. He walks faster than you just to spite you for earlier, but he hears your last words through a huff of breath. 

“Jeez, you’re fast. I’ll see you at lunch, be prepared!” 

Somehow, he feels like he’s crossed paths with something he shouldn’t’ve. 

__

You keep up with your end of the deal with Rin to the best of your ability. 

The upsides of your arrangement is that the usual annoyances Rin has to deal with have decreased significantly in the time you’ve been hanging around him. You’re very good at using your speech to sway conversations one way or the other without upsetting the other party.

Normally, Rin’s rejections for different things leave a bitter taste in the air. He’s never been good at mincing his words for anyone and while it doesn’t affect him - the strange stares and whispers he gets are a little annoying to deal with. People always take his disinterest personally. Rin has always hated that. He was probably a little gentler about the denial before but still. 

While other people are too stupid to pay it any mind, you’re clever at turning the tides your way. You always manage to completely divert their questions without making them feel uncomfortable. Rin has tried, many times, to actually break down how you’re doing it. He doesn’t think he’d ever be able to replicate it, no matter how much he studies you. 

He’s reluctant to admit it, but really, your presence has significantly lowered the number of obstacles in his daily life and made him overall, less irritable. 

Instead of many annoying things, there’s only you. Which is tolerable in comparison. 

You also expect him to uphold his end of the deal. For the most part, this has just meant you inserting yourself into his usual activities. It started out small enough, mostly just you sitting with him during lunch. It draws too much attention to eat in the classroom so you both fuck off to the roof. 

(You often joke about how romantic it is, reminiscing on your rejected first love with as much melodrama as you can muster. 

Rin never laughs about it to your face, but he admits it’s funny. Your stupidity is mildly amusing, at least ) 

There, you eat lunch together. Rin learns you make yourself colorful bentos from time to time- though some days are much less elaborate than others. You like to unwind that way, your designated and nightly me-time. You work part-time, and you take care of your neighbors kids by helping them every morning and night. 

Rin doesn’t ask you for more, not willing to deliberately show interest. 

But you notice his curiosity for better or for worse and explain that she, the woman next door, used to make you dinner back when your parents were too busy. You have an older brother who's nearly twelve years your senior so you were alone for most of your childhood. She had children late, but they feel like your little siblings. So you help them in the mornings and in the evenings when you have time. 

Rin learns you, funnily enough, have a sense of obligation towards other people that he can’t fully comprehend. He forgot there were people like that. In an environment like Bluelock that is so dead set on fostering ego, it’s easy to forget something so simple. 

You haven’t confessed to him again since that time. Not like he’s expecting it, but given your personality he wonders why. He thought it’d be more of a daily occurence, something like a bit you did. But you never do. Even when at times, it’s so heavy in the atmosphere even he can tell you want too. 

Admittedly, Rin wonders a lot more about you than he cares to. He wonders why you spend so much time with him when you have plenty of other friends who seem to cherish you. He wonders why you care so much about the dying club you're in. He wonders if this, in some strange way, stems from some kind of obligation.

He wonders, sometimes, what about him you could even like. It’s probably something stupid. You’d probably think long and hard before going on to say that you like him because he’s handsome or cool. Something shallow and meaningless. 

He tells himself that when he starts thinking about it again. 

__

Rin gets roped into cleaning the classroom with you. 

He’s used to being paired with other people. But he’s never had to do with you before, even in the years prior. Or maybe he did. He doesn’t recall much of his first year. 

Still, now that it’s already mid-May, Rin has never been on cleaning duty with you. He’s conscious of the sound of your name these days. It’s not something he’s happy about. 

It’s a simple affair. Just 15 or 20 minutes. Nothing to talk about. Not really. 

But, today you’re alone with him. Alone in an empty classroom with light pouring through the windows and reflecting off of the wooden desks. You’re busying yourself with wiping down the chalkboard, humming quietly. Rin has the broom and dust pan, slowly working himself towards the front of the room. 

It’s mostly quiet. Just your humming. The soft thud of a dust pan, a gentle brush of the bristle. 

Rin feels a crick in his neck, half-way done with the task at hand. He stares at you, off in the front. In your own little world as you fix everything up diligently without turning your head to look up at him even once. 

The nape of your neck is visible from the way you’re standing. There’s a chain there. Do you wear a necklace under your uniform? He can see the slope of your shoulders. The light reflects on you. 

It stops him dead in his tracks. All he can hear is the quiet. The soft humming of your voice. The thud of the dust pan, the woosh of an eraser. The gentle bristle of a broom. The sound of his own heartbeat, a little louder than it was a minute ago. 

He shakes his head. He goes back to sweeping. 

__

“Why do you look like that?” 

You look depressed. For Rin, this expression on you is unusual. You do look sad sometimes.  Somber, occasionally but the look you have on your face right now is down right harrowing. You’re staring blankly out into the open, sitting in the usual spot the two of you have lunch at. But you’ve hardly touched your food and your favorite juicebox (a lunchtime staple) doesn’t have a straw in it yet. 

It’s freaking him out, quite frankly. He stares at you, waving a hand in front of your face until you click back into reality. You jump in your skin at the sight of him before taking a deep breath once you’ve realized who’s in front of you. 

“Oh. It’s just you. Sorry,” You say, immediately going for your juice. See? “What did you say?” 

He sighs, sitting down next to you with his own lunch. Nothing special, something his mom likes to pack when he’s at home - though he doesn’t often take it. He opens up his own tin, taking chopsticks out attached from the top. 

“I asked why you looked like that.” 

“Like what?” 

“Like someone just died.” 

You look at him morbidly, clasping your hands and leaning forward with your elbows on your knees. 

“My midterm grades,” You say solemnly, voice wavering ever so slightly “They’re detestable. A shame to my bloodline.” 

Rin looks at you plainly. 

“Aren’t you an idiot to begin with?” 

“Hey! I’ll have you know I’m average. Super average. But I scored even lower than usual and I’m concerned. I need to do well on the next one and on my entrance exams.” 

Oh, right. Rin forgot since he has no plans to take any. 

“Do you know what you want to do for college?” He asks, mostly out of obligation. 

“I want to study journalism.” There’s a wispiness to your way of speaking. It gives the air a sentimental feel. “There’s a private university with a good program I want to get into but they’re kind of tough. So I have to focus and do well,” 

“What subject are you struggling with?” 

You deflate all over again. 

“Chemistry and Classical Japanese,” 

Rin does well in both subjects. He thinks it over, and decides he can consider this payback. That’s all it is. He’s never liked owing people for favors and while you say this much is enough - Rin can rest assured about your little deal if he’s actually been of use to you in return. He remains impassive as he takes a sip of water. 

“Do you want me to help you study?” 

You turn to him immediately, suddenly full of life. He doesn’t like the gleam in your eyes, an immediate regret settling in as he stares at you, eyes full of disdain. You don’t hesitate grabbing his hand, putting it to your forehead and bowing deeply as you face him. You’re like a fly that keeps buzzing around him. 

“Are you serious? Really? Forreal? Do you mean it?” 

“If you keep being  a dipshit I’m going to take it back,” 

You pull away, hands folded in your lap, going stone faced.

“I would be very grateful,” You say, hands clasped in front of your face. He rolls his eyes. 

“Don’t get the wrong idea,” He says bluntly, staring out into space “I just don’t want to owe you any favors.” 

This you laugh at, leaning back on the wall behind you - with your legs stretched out. 

“Don’t worry,” You reply, self-assured. “Somehow, you asking me to study with you so innocently really cements it in that you don’t have a shred of affection for me.” 

Something in him stirs. He ignores it. 

“Never in a million years.” 

You laugh light-heartedly. 

“You’re so cold to me, Itoshi-kun.” 

“You still call me that.” He grimaces. You stare at him confused. 

“How else would I call you?” 

“When you use my last name it reminds me of my brother,” 

“...Are you implying I should use your first name?” 

Oh. Shit. That is what he sort of said, isn’t it? 

“No,” He denies, somehow unable to come up with anything worthwhile “Don’t address me at all.” 

“Eh? But that’s impossible? I can try but,” 

Only an idiot like you would think to actually try. He shakes his head. It’s no good after all. 

“Shut up,” He decides, because there’s not anything else he can think to say “We can study at the library.” 

You’re quick to reject the proposal. 

“We have to pick somewhere else. Like a cafe or something,” You say, not looking at him. You have your phone pulled up now, looking for places nearby. He’s lost again. 

“What? Why? Isn’t it easier if it’s at school?” 

You glance over at him wide-eyed, before suddenly smiling. It’s a knowing smile, almost like you feel sorry for him. He wants to ask why you look like that. It’s weirdly guarded and he hates that from you. He stares at you, trying to will you to explain yourself. You’re good at reading his thoughts, frustratingly enough, so he’s not accustomed to asking. 

Which means your lack of answer is deliberate, and even with the pressure he’s putting on you, you don’t budge.

“Trust me on this one,” You voice light and airy. “It’s better if we find somewhere away from school, too. There’s still some time to look, so no rush.” 

He lets it go because he doesn’t have any other choice. Lunch passes and you talk like everything's normal.

The question lingers in the back of his mind. 

__ 

Rin spends most of his time between classes watching soccer. If he has some free time on his day off, he’ll look for a new movie to watch. There’s a new foreign film coming out from a director who he really likes and he’s just finished watching the trailer.

Thirsty, with nothing to do - he stands to his feet and briefly surveys the classroom. He wants a drink and there’s a vending machine down the hallway with a sports drink that tastes like..something. 

His airpods are close to being dead so there’s no music as he makes his way. He’s not a fan of being forced to listen to the chatter of the general populace so it’s not that hard to ignore.  

It catches his attention when he hears your name in passing before turning the corner of the hall. It stops him dead in his tracks, something tense left in the syllables after . He doesn’t know why he stopped, not exactly. He figured it’d be annoying if his presence caused a ruckus. 

He’s used to people talking about you, though they usually describe you as a busybody. The Senpai who’s everywhere. A hand in every jar, or something like that. But there’s a tone to that, mild amusement - never malice, that Rin is more than accustomed to. 

This is not that, he notices. He leans on the wall and listens. A group of girls. Some of the voices he recognizes. They’re from the third year classroom down the hall. 

“It’s like, I don’t know,”  Eto-san, he thinks. She’s come up to him before, more times than he can really count on one hand. Rin knows the type. Kind but not really. To the point it’s hard for anyone to call her out on it. “It’s weird how much she hangs around him. She’s not a bad girl or anything,” 

The addition makes Rin’s eye twitch. Yeah. He’s very familiar with this type. He keeps listening. Another voice, but he has no idea who this one is. 

“Really? But Senpai is pretty kind to me,” 

“Mm, I guess so. I just wonder if it makes Itoshi-kun uncomfortable, you know? With pushy people like that, it doesn’t matter how blunt you are. I just worry about him a bit.” 

If it wasn’t so annoying to listen in, Rin would laugh. He’s never understood girls. Especially not highschool ones. He doesn’t pay attention to that kind of social hierarchical shit to begin with, only forced to acknowledge it because other people do. None of it matters to him.

He does think back to what you said a week ago, about finding a place away from school to study. It clicks. You probably know they talk about you like this. Or you could surmise this outcome. Rin should expect that level of awareness from you. Sincere. Always attuned to everyone. Of course this is something you know but he doesn’t. 

Why didn’t you tell him? That’s annoying. It’s nothing he couldn’t deal with knowing. He would’ve got it if you explained it earlier. 

“Oh wow, you really care about him Eto-san,” 

There’s a soft chuckle that makes Rin annoyed. Is he supposed to feel grateful? They’ve barely spoken to each other.

“It’s not like that. It must be hard since he missed second year, that’s all.” 

With that, Rin decides to turn the corner. 

He’s a little pleased at the reaction. How everyone goes into complete silence when he arrives. He spares her a glance as he moves towards the vending machines, clicking in the buttons. A generic sports drink comes tumbling out of the bottom, and Rin grabs it with deliberate slowness - drawing out the unease. 

Eto-san gives him a blank stare before suddenly looking cheerful. She seems a little panicked, quickly trying to make conversation with him. The words don’t reach his ears as he stares down at her expressionlessly.

“Are you done?”  He says, ice-cold. She stutters at that. Rin suppresses a smile. 

“Oh, uhm, yeah. Sorry, were you busy?” 

“Yeah,” He says back, completely apathetic. 

He doesn’t plan on saying anymore in the first place. The little victories count. 

It does feel like some kind of magic when he hears your voice from the other end of the hallway. You’re practically shouting it, and following is the sound of the hall monitors telling you off for running as you barrel toward him full speed. He can hear the thud of your sneakers all the way till they skid to a stop. 

You’re out of breath, bent over your knees and messy as you put a hand up. Most times, he would be embarrassed. He’d even tell you off for being such an idiot. Right now, he finds the corners of his lips upturned as he stares at you from where you stand. 

“Oh, hey guys. Sorry, I had some business with this guy. Oh, Fujita-chan, your hair is cute today! I like how it looks up on you,”  You say, to the girl who was calling you kind just a minute ago “I hope he wasn’t too cruel to you. He’s actually afraid of women, it’s a generational curse. Every night he turns into a frog and—” 

You shuffle in front him, arms stretched out like a shield. He sticks his leg out and kicks your shin. You yelp in pain. 

“What the hell are you talking about? Shut up.” 

“Ow, you strong bastard. You’re a soccer player, please be more conscious of your kicks. What if you shattered my shin? I know you’re loaded but it’s the principle of the thing, you know—” 

“Stop talking or I’ll kick you a second time.” 

You go silent immediately. 

“Forgive me, Itoshi-sama. I’ve strayed from the path of righteousness. Alas, the people need you.” You say, turning around. 

“Speak clearly.” 

“Homeroom teacher wanted to double check with you about after graduation plans and told me to go get you.” 

“Why you?”

“I was already walking around for the newspaper club.” 

He nods, not needing any more explanation. 

“H-hey, aren’t you acting too friendly with him?” 

So she decided to speak. This makes you falter, just a little, and Rin detests the look of self-satisfaction on her face. He speaks this time. It’s not like he can’t fight any of his own battles. 

“It’s fine,” He says, not bothering to think about it. He looks at you, as you stare back at him where he stands, wide-eyed. Idiot. “I don’t mind.”

You grin at him. Big and rounded and stupid, with all of your teeth like you’re giddy. If the hallway monitor wasn’t up your ass, he figures you’d be skipping about now. You usher him into the hall, back where he came from, waving them off.

“Be seeing you guys, then! Bye!” 

And you’re off. It’s quiet until you’re both completely out of ear-shot. Before he can go any further you stand in front of him, hands behind your back with a dumb look on your face. He already knows what you’re going to say. 

“Hey. I really like you a lot. Just now… my heart was fluttering. I thought I was hallucinating,” 

“You’re a moron,” 

“Ahhh, what should I do? I’m all hot under the collar. Is this what it’s like being a maiden in love? It’s great.” 

“How can you say that knowing I’ve already rejected you?” 

“It’s because you’ve rejected me, I can say that.” 

And Rin doesn't really get it. He’s not sure he ever will. 

But you seem happy enough. He decides against prying. 

__

Somehow, you’ve ended up at Rin’s house. 

He doesn’t know how it happened. Really. 

He mentioned to his mother off-handedly that he needed to help someone study. He should’ve lied about it then, but coming off of running drills makes him pretty stupid. He uses most of his brain power when he trains. So in an altered state of mind due to dehydration, hunger and general exhaustion - he answered  honestly instead of lying. 

You’re helping someone study? Yes, they’re from my class. 

Is it a boy or a girl? A girl. We’re friends. 

You can’t study at the library? She doesn’t want to, so we’re trying to find somewhere else. 

Why not invite her here, if her parents are okay with it? Her parent’s don’t really pay enough attention to be bothered. 

Wait, what is he saying? 

Rin doesn’t know how it happened. Really. Really. He tried pretty hard to reject his mothers advances about the situation but he’s never been one to upset her. The whole thing with Sae really tore her up so they both had a silent agreement to try and get along at home. And since Rin is still living at home for now, he tries harder to listen to her. Even so, he wasn’t planning on yielding for this one. 

Rin is not immune to his mothers guilt. A long lecture about how her only sons never cared about anything but soccer and how she’s worried she’s never going to have grandchildren later, he finally gave in and gave you a call at his dinner table. 

He was hoping you would come through and reject the offer. Say something stupid about how that’s dangerous territory for a young girl in love and let his mom down gently. He forgot about your whole thing about responsibility and being a nice girl who gets along well with adults. 

And now, the door is ringing and Rin knows he’s going to open it to you. He mostly blames himself for not thinking ahead.

Rin opens the door on a Saturday afternoon and the first thing he thinks is that you’re not wearing your uniform. 

You look…different. It’s weird. Your hair is styled in an unusual way, tied with something like ribbon. You’re wearing something flowy and loose but the neck is a little rounder than usual. There’s a necklace there, a heart-pendant with a chain. You have in...earrings. 

Rin thinks vaguely that you look…something. He doesn’t know. But in his vision you’re like a troublesome and amorphous blob that yammers on about nothing. And right now you look…not like that. 

“You’re dressed up.” Are the first words to come out of his mouth. You blink at him owlishly.

“Oh. Yeah. I wanted to make a good impression on your mom so I tried not to look sloppy.” You say sheepishly. He leans against the doorframe. 

“She doesn’t care about stuff like that.” 

“Well I do, okay? Now, can I come in?” 

“The white slippers are for you.”

He steps aside and lets you in. You have perfect manners. He probably should’ve expected that. You take your shoes off neatly and place them on the rack the same way, slipping your feet into the slippers provided. Rin just watches, eyes tracing the curve of your neck. 

“Where’s your mom?” You ask.

“In the kitchen making dinner. You’re staying for dinner right?” 

You blink at him, surprised. 

“I mean it’s not like I can’t.” 

“She’d be upset if you didn’t.” He says noncommittally before walking you down to the kitchen. 

His mother is right where he expects. He stands in the corner as you shuffle in watching on. She turns around to look at you, wiping her hands on her apron. 

“Oh, my, you must be Rin’s friend? Such a lovely girl. Welcome! Welcome.” 

To this, you bow your head as deep as it can go. The air around you feels serious. Rin scoffs internally. There’s a strange feeling in his chest that he can’t describe, seeing you bowing in front of his mom. An itch he can’t reach, locked tight around his ribs. 

You give his mother your name first and she smiles like she’s absolutely delighted just hearing it. 

“Thank you for having me. I brought some fruit with me as a gift, I hope that’s alright.” 

His mom shoots him a look that Rin deflects by turning away, opening the plastic bag you’ve handed to her. 

“Oh my! Aren’t these expensive fruits? Please thank your parents for me!” 

“Oh no, don’t worry about that. I work part-time, so I paid for them myself. It was the least I could do. I’m grateful for the tutoring.” 

You tense up, realizing that might’ve been an awkward thing to say. It isn’t. Even if it was, Rin’s mother has always been soft-hearted. His dad tells him they’re a lot alike but Rin doesn’t see it. Whatever it may be, Rin’s mom is too doting and too sociable to let you feel bad. Right now she seems emotional, an expression between empathy and pride. She reaches for you like it’s the most natural thing in the world, patting your head gently.

“How diligent. Thank you, then, for the fruit.” 

Rin can’t see your face but it’s easy to picture. 

“Of course. And pardon the intrusion! And uhm, thank you for having me for dinner.” 

Clumsy. Rin thinks you’re clumsy. A flickering light. His mom laughs brightly and tells you not to worry. She leans in closer like she’s whispering but Rin can hear her loud and clear. 

“Rin can be very brash but he’s a good boy, so thank you for being kind to him.” 

He feels embarrassed. Even readies himself to intervene. 

“He is very kind to me.” 

Wait. What?

His mom smiles even brighter, and mouths something like ��take care of her’ when you’re not looking. He wants to stop it before it starts. You’re not dating. You’re hardly even friends, you’re just here to study. Rin almost wants to shout it, but he’s stuck. Before he can do any of that, you’re turning around and smiling like you haven’t said anything strange. 

What do you mean he’s kind to you? When his whole thing is rejecting you mercilessly? Being cruel?

What kind of person would ever describe him as kind? 

He can’t find the words he wants to say, so he takes you to his room in silence. 

__

You both make it to Rin’s room in one piece.

You’ve been studying now for about an hour. Given your personality, Rin was expecting more of a fuss. He thought you’d make some comment about being in a boys room and then fight off the actual studying like the plague. 

Much to his surprise, you started studying with him right away. Rin tries his best to tutor you, though he does make fun of you in the process. But you’re a try-hard all the same, stopping only to ask questions and get clarification occasionally.

You’ve been focused that whole time, miraculously enough. Rin studies too, but only a bit, after deciding to study some recent matches instead. 

( Every now and again, he’ll glance at you. Just to see if you’re stuck or still working. Each time, he gets caught up on the fact you’re not in your uniform and has to tear his eyes away. ) 

After a bout of silence, you yawn out loud, quietly shutting your workbook. 

“I’ve finished all my practice problems for today,” You announce, before deciding to lay down on his floor “I’m beat.” 

“I thought you were gonna give up before you started.”  Rin admits. You frown at him. 

“I was serious about needing tutoring. Thanks for all your help.” 

“I already told you it’s fine. Is there anything else? Finals are next week.” 

You shake your head. 

“Mm, I don’t think so. One of the guys from the newspaper club helped me with math so I’ll be okay.” 

…Huh? 

“From the newspaper club?” 

“Huh? Yeah. Murata-senpai. We’re in the same year. He’s a few months older so he insists on making me call him Senpai.” 

“And he helped you with math?” 

“Yeah. He was a delinquent like, all of first year but he really cleaned up his act. He’s actually really gentle.”

Rin frowns at that. 

“Do people usually describe delinquents as gentle?”  

You make a noise of indignance from where you’re laid on his floor. 

“Hey. Murata-senpai is really nice, okay? And he is gentle, so I won’t tolerate your usual judginess.” 

Rin rolls his eyes. 

“How’d you even meet him?” 

“Uh…I wanted to write a column about him, basically. He was helping in the garden last year and I kinda…stalked him. It sounds worse than it is. I just wanted to know what made him change.” 

“So stalking people is pretty typical for you.” 

You sit up and gape at him. Rin suppresses a laugh. 

“Anyways. I eventually flagged him down for an interview. Apparently, he had a real scare with his granny getting sick and decided he needed to cut the shit. He’s a good guy. He joined the newspaper club after the interview,” 

“After the interview…?” 

You nod, leaning forward with your elbows on the table in front of you. 

“Uh-huh. Said he was interested because of my passion or something. He’s been really nice to me ever since and helps me with all of the ideas I have.” You soften as you talk about it. Rin feels an ugly emotion in his chest “I’m worried about what will happen to the club after graduation, but Senpai is always encouraging me to make the most out of the time we still have. So I’m really thankful for him. That’s why you have to be nice.” 

Rin is super annoyed. He doesn’t know why he’s so annoyed but he is. How do you not realize this guy likes you? He doesn’t know why he’s opening his mouth to tell you what’s so obvious. It’s not like it really matters. Rin doesn’t like you in the first place, so if he informs you that your beloved Murata-senpai has feelings for you - it’s no big deal. 

In fact it might be better for everyone if you realize. He’s just frustrated by how clueless you can be sometimes. 

“He’s interested in you,” Rin says, against his better judgment. It feels like the words are welling up in his throat “Your senpai or whatever.” 

You blink at him stupidly. He wonders if you’re wearing mascara. 

“Huh? I doubt that somehow. Senpai is kind to me but I think he sees me like a little sister.” 

He scoffs at you. 

“You would think that. Most guys aren’t just nice to girls they don’t like.” 

“Not everyone is like you, yanno.” You say back without thinking twice. That’s not the point this time, he wants to say. And he’s right for this one. Anyone else with half of a brain would realize. You’re just… you. Which means you’re absolutely unaware of things pertaining to you. It’s the only reason he can think you’d deny something so obvious. 

The only reason you could come to the house of a boy you liked just to study. 

“Shut up. I’m saying this because you’re too much of a dumbass to put it together on your own. The guy definitely likes you.” 

“I didn’t know you were a love guru,” You say sarcastically, sticking your tongue out at him. Childish. Annoying “It doesn’t matter if he does.” 

“Why wouldn’t it matter?” 

You give him an incredulous look. 

“Unfortunately my heart is captured by an aloof sportsman.” 

He doesn’t know why he feels relieved when you say that. He feels his heart all the way in his throat like he’s going to throw it up, even though his expression remains impassive. 

“You already know I don’t like you, though. It’s a good opportunity, isn’t it? Don’t a lot of people move on that way.”

You shake your head. 

“I’m not that sort of wishy-washy woman.” You reply, huffing your chest up and trying to ease the tension. You stop to shake your head, a small smile on your face. “You wouldn’t get it even if I explained.” 

“It’s annoying when you do that,” Rin voices, not bothering to cut it any other way “You did that with the girls at school too. I’m never gonna get it if you don’t bother explaining it to me.” 

You soften at this, then whisper. 

“...Why do you care?” But it’s not said with any malice. It’s not said sadly either. Just curious. He freezes, but doesn’t let it show. He wants to ask himself the same question. 

“I don’t. It’s just,” And he scoffs, not looking at your face “It’s a pain.” 

You hum, not expecting more of an answer. 

“I want to treasure my own feelings towards you,” You say, and something in Rin feels like it’s being set on fire. “It’s not just about having a boyfriend. If it was, then I’d consider Senpai's feelings.” 

“...So it’s about me, specifically?” 

“Yeah,” You say without offering any more explanation than that “It is. I like you.”

The words but why, linger in the air. You seem to be feeling merciful, as you lean back on your palms and stare up at his ceiling. You wear your heart outside of your body, more often than not. And he thinks that part of you is so hard to get used to. 

“You’re really awkward. And aloof. And you don’t have any friends.” 

“Is this some kind of revenge or…?” 

“But. You’re also sensitive. The more I know you, the more I think you’re kind and well-meaning. You uh, remind me of a cat.” 

He blinks. 

“A cat?” 

“A cat. Sometimes they want their own space. And sometimes they knock your water off your desk for fun. Plus they only really care about people in their own circle,”

“Again, is this—” 

“Let me finish, jeez. They’re solitary creatures. But like when they accept you, they get comfortable. An’ nice . And they look out for you in their own way. To me you’re a lot like that.” 

You give him a smile so warm it makes his back hot. So loud and so vibrant like it burst out of him at any minute. 

“I’ve uh, always been interested in you. I watched you play in Bluelock too. I kept thinking to myself, there’s something about you. I want to know more, even if it’s just a little. Stuff like that.” You talk so quietly yet it’s all Rin can hear. All Rin can see in his vision is you. All Rin can think about is you. “I’ve always been interested in other peoples stories.  So I thought, what a waste it would be, to throw away that feeling because of something like love or like. I thought, ‘What's your story, Itoshi Rin?’” 

Rin doesn’t know what to say so he chooses to say nothing. 

“When I confessed, I knew you would never like me. Because that’s just the sort of person everyone says you are. Still, what a waste, right? You miss all the shots you don’t take or whatever. So, I wanted to get to know you. I guess.”  

“I don’t get it. I get what you’re like but it still doesn’t make any sense. There’s nothing special to know, is there?” 

“Feeling that is special, don’t you think? That’s a special reason to me.” 

He doesn’t follow. You laugh lightly. 

“If I never became interested in Murata-senpai’s story, I would’ve never been his friend. If I gave up on trying to know you, just because you didn’t return to my one-sided feelings, then I would’ve never gotten to know you either. Don’t you think that’s a waste?” 

Rin doesn’t know. He’s never really cared about it. He’s rejected so many confessions and never once thought enough about any of them in any depth. That part of you is foreign. He can chalk it up to a difference in character. He can’t understand wanting to know someone just because. 

(Or maybe he can. He just hasn’t until now. Until this very moment, suspended in time. Where he wants to know what things make you the way you are.) 

Some small, dark part of him wants to ask why. Over and over until his throat feels raw - long enough to understand it. Even as he grips onto that desire so tight, with such bruising force, the words sit in his mouth. They taste like iron. They taste like a bitten tongue. If you’ve watched him all this time, then you know. Being chosen. He’s never been confident in that. Rin wants to ask, why him? 

What’s so special? Enough to keep talking to him? Enough to do any of this? Is getting to know people is always this difficult, he wonders. Does it always feel uncomfortable to be in proximity with someone? 

In the end, he can’t bring himself to ask. He can’t even bear to examine it in himself, the sense of dread washing over him like sickness. He’s nauseous. And this time, there’s a residue of tension he’s finding increasingly difficult to ignore. 

You come through again. He wonders if you can read his mind just like you do with all the nobodies at school. 

“Rin-kun,” You say, your voice like the summer heat. “Getting to know you makes me feel like my feelings aren’t a waste. I’m happy getting to know you. I want to treasure that.” 

What happens when you run out of things to know? The question is too heavy. He settles on a different one. He wants to understand it more. Just to put himself at ease. 

“Isn’t being in the same room with someone who rejected you uncomfortable?” 

“Maybe. But there’s a clear line for me and you, so it’s cool. In like, ten years, maybe someone will interview me about you. As your classmate and stuff. And I’ll go - ‘He’s actually a really nice guy. I actually had a crush on him.’ If I can say that, without being regretful, then that’ll be enough for me.” 

“That’ll be enough for you? Really?” 

“Really.” 

“You’re so weird.” He says, unsure of what else he could possibly say. You giggle, and lay back down on his floor. 

“I knew you’d say that.” 

__ 

Summer comes. 

It doesn’t occur to Rin how often he sees you in school until it all comes to  a halt. He has your number, and you text him often - about unimportant and trivial shit that you think of. In that way, it doesn’t even really feel like you’ve separated. 

But the sudden absence of your chattering in his life makes everything feel especially quiet. Summer is a boring time for Rin. It’s mostly the same. Practicing and playing and studying. On the few occasions he’s been out, it’s because some of the other Bluelock members are gathering and refuse to let him know even a breath of peace.

He’s seen Sae now, though they never really talk about anything. Sort of just look at each other and exchange enough words that their mom doesn’t cry before going back to their room. Sae will be gone before school starts back up again, so Rin isn’t all that worried about it. 

It occurs to Rin for the first time that this summer will be the last of his highschool days. He’s never been sentimental about stuff like that - so he figures you’re to blame for these sudden thoughts. 

Your summer has been a lot busier than his. He should probably expect this from you by now, but your surprisingly youthful social life always shocks him. You’ve been working part-time as usual. In that time though, you’ve also been to the beach and been on an overnight trip to Osaka with your newspaper club. 

(Rin wasn’t happy to hear about this. He was relieved to know it was with a teacher and that you roomed with a girl. But still, not exactly his favorite of anecdotes for the summer.) 

You’ve invited Rin more than once to come hang out with you, but he’s basically always declined. The group setting is troublesome, but being alone with you feels even worse somehow. It wouldn’t be a date, obviously, but it would be something. Something deliberate. 

Rin doesn’t know if he can come see you in good faith for such a reason. 

It’s another day spent doing his usual. Being technical, it’s a rest day, which means he’s only allowed to stretch. He has done his basics. Studied, messed around with his ball, responded to a barrage of texts from Bachira and Isagi. He played games for a while, checking out a new horror game before deciding it’d be best not to get too sucked in so he has something to play next time. 

After all that, during a mid-August day while Rin sits on his couch and watches T.V., he receives a facetime call from you for the very first time. At first, he just lets it ring. But when it keeps ringing - he figures your persistence is going to continue unless he replies. 

He looks around. No one's home, so he doesn’t need to go to his room. He swipes, and the call connects. The screen shows him, propped up against something with a full shot of your room. You’re turned away from the camera. Rin just stares. 

“Oh, shit - did you actually pick up?” 

“Should I hang up.” 

“No! No, I just wasn’t expecting you. Don’t hang up. I need a guy's opinion.” 

“What? What for?” 

“I got in a fight with my brother about a dress I bought,” You say, exasperated, and Rin is surprised because you hardly see him. “I know he’s probably looking out for me but I don’t think we talk enough for him to be telling me how to dress.” 

“He’s older than you, right? Maybe you should listen to him.” 

“You’re the last person I want to hear that from. Either way, I’m not a kid. I’m already 18 and I’m going to college. It’s a cute dress! I feel like it’s fine.”

“So..why’d you call me again?” 

“I’m gonna try it on and show you. Murata-senpai is busy.” 

“You shouldn’t do that to a guy who likes you.” Rin deadpans. You laugh.

“Shut up. I really need an opinion. I wanted to wear it to go out today so if it’s actually too provocative then I have to change my outfit.” 

“Where are you even going?” 

“My friend needs to get a concealer, so probably the mall or something. After that I’ll go buy some stationary.” 

“Alone? What about your friend?” 

“She’s gonna go see her boyfriend.” 

“Why can’t you just go with them? Or ask them to go with you” 

“And third wheel? I’m good. I just need some stationary and then I’ll be home. Easy peasy. Anyway, what’s with the interrogation?” 

“It’s not interrogation.” He insists. You’re offscreen so Rin can’t see you, but he can hear the sound of a zipper echo in the speakers. He’s also sure you’re rolling your eyes. 

When you come on camera, the dress of the hour is on display. Rin’s first thought is to tell you to take it off. It is too provocative to him. The front is fine as is, but it’s nearly backless and it’s cut too high on your thighs. He’s never seen so much of your skin. Maybe that’s a given, since he didn’t go to the beach with you either. 

You give him a quick spin, before patting the front down. You say something, but the words don’t register. It feels like his brain is full of cotton or something. 

“So? Too much? I mean it’s backless but like. I don’t know, it’s kind of loose? And the sleeves are long. Neckline isn’t that bad, either.” 

Rin just says what he thinks “You shouldn’t go out alone wearing it.” 

You frown at him. 

“That’s not helpful, Rin-kun.” 

“It’s…fine. What time does your friend have to go?” 

“Probably right after we’re done.” 

He sighs. 

“Tell her to go with her boyfriend early. I’ll come with you to get your stationary.” 

“Wait, what? Did I hear that right? You’re coming to get me? After I’ve been hounding you to hang out? What’s with the change of heart?” 

“I don’t have anything to do since it’s a rest day. You need stuff and I don’t think you should be out alone. Don’t read into it.” 

“Kinda hard not too but I’m not gonna complain. Are you coming right now?” 

“Yeah. Send me your address.” 

__ 

Rin has no idea what impulse has brought him here. 

That’s not entirely true. What brought him to your apartment towards the end of summer is impulse. He acted on nothing but impulse.

Rin, for better or for worse, finds that you’re clueless about yourself. The fact you were going to call Murata-senpai is already bothering him enough. That, along with the fact you wore the dress and didn’t think it was too short is troubling. It’s not that Rin wants to tell you what not to wear. He doesn’t have the right but you did ask. 

Anyway, it’s a lot less agitating if you’re being accompanied while wearing it. Going alone in something like that, even if it’s the middle of summer, would be stupid.  

Rin doesn’t make it a habit of worrying about the outfits of girls he doesn’t know. He does know you though. He thinks you’d be really annoying if something happened and you got upset about it. So, all he’s doing is preventing that outcome. It’s nothing more than that. 

He knocks on your door as he shakes the thoughts out of his head, and he’s greeted by a man in his late twenties. It dawns on Rin that this is your brother. He really didn’t think this through. 

Your brother is an imposing person. He’s a head taller than Rin with a gruff voice and a scar on his cheek. Rin stares at him blankly. 

“Who are you?” 

“Itoshi Rin. I’m here for—” 

“Nii-san, tell Rin-kun to come inside and sit! I’m not done getting ready.” 

Your brother glares at him. 

“Who’s he? Your boyfriend? Is that why—” 

You come stumbling out of your room, half-dressed and Rin immediately averts his eyes. This is the most uncomfortable experience of his life.

“He’s not my boyfriend. He already rejected me, so we’re just friends. Stop fussing and let him in, it’s hot out.” 

“He rejected you?” 

Rin should just leave. 

“I already knew he was going to. Now move,” 

Rin doesn’t enjoy being involved in your sibling quarrel. Suddenly, he feels a twinge of regret about some old Bluelock memories. He understands it now more than ever, gaining a little empathy. 

Your brother moves out of the way. You’re standing in the hall, with a single stocking on and powder on your face he’s pretty sure is meant to be brushed. You grin at him. 

“Sorry! I won’t be long, promise. You got here faster than I thought you would.” 

Rin can feel a pair of eyes in the back of his skull. 

“Uh. Yeah. I took the bus so it was quick.” 

“It might be uncomfortable here. Do you wanna sit in my room instead? It’s colder but it’s kind of a mess—” 

“He can sit here.”  Your brother insists. Rin is never leaving his house again. You frown. 

“Didn’t I already tell you we’re not dating? He’s not even interested in me, it’s not like anything is gonna happen.” 

“It’s the principle of it.”  Yeah. Definitely siblings. 

“Whatever. If you make him uncomfortable, I’m gonna yell at you. Rin-kun, sorry. Do you need anything? Juice? Water?” 

Your hospitality throws him off. You’re different at home. 

“Uh. No. I’m okay.” 

“Okay, then I’ll hurry and get dressed. Nii-san, please be civil.” 

With that, you flounce back up to your room. Your brother is staring hard in Rin’s direction. He’s not intimidated. It’s just… so awkward it’s kind of unbearable for him. What do people usually do in this situation? Rin’s not exactly the sociable type.

“She confessed to you?” 

Rin is startled. 

“Uh. Yeah. In April.” 

“And you’re friends?” 

“She asked to be friends.” 

Your brother looks distressed. 

“I don’t understand that girl at all.” 

Rin doesn't either. 

“What’s she like in school?” 

Rin stares. Oh. He’s that kind of older brother. 

“Uh. Busy. She’s in the newspaper club so she’s always doing something. She has a lot of friends and gets along with our class.” 

“I see…that’s good. I’m always worried about her. Our family has  always been busy and I moved out when I was 18 so… we don’t see much of each other. She doesn’t talk about herself that much either.” 

Rin nods absently. What circle of hell is this? 

“She probably thinks I’m just being overprotective,” Bullseye “But I just worry she grew up too fast.” 

Rin thinks if he were a different kind of guy, now would be the time he gives your older brother an encouraging heart to heart. The script is there. It’s just not how he honestly feels. Rin doesn’t take pleasure in defending you. But it’s hypocritical and a little ridiculous to hear it from him.

Some of it is leftover resentment from Sae. The rest is knowing you.

You did grow up too fast. From what he knows about teenage girls, they’re supposed to be…meaner. More hysterical. More inconsiderate. Less responsible and more in the moment. Messy. All teenagers are, really. 

For all the ways you are clumsy and ridiculous, sometimes Rin thinks you’re too off-puttingly mature. It wouldn’t kill you to be more selfish. To be just a little less self-reliant. It’s not normal is it? To be so grateful for things you’re owed. It bothers him. Always has. 

Rin knows what the script is. But it bothers him. 

“If you know that then you don’t really have any right to intervene,” Rin says bluntly. “Suddenly acting protective and considerate when she grew up on her own  is just going to feel stifling. Aren’t you just trying to make yourself feel better?” 

He looks surprised by his answer. Hurt too. 

“I guess that’s right,” 

He frowns. 

“If you actually care, just be honest. She’s not the type of person to turn someone away on a grudge.” 

Before Rin can feel embarrassed about what he’s said, you come stumbling down the steps all dressed up. Your brother gives you a look. 

“Do you need any money?” 

You look at him confused then shake your head no. 

“Okay. Stay safe and have fun.” 

He turns to leave. You watch him go. Rin puts his hands in his pockets like he’s trying to wipe himself of it. 

“Weird… anyways. Ready to go?” 

“Yeah.” 

__ 

Your outing goes well. 

Outing. Not a date. No matter how many times people mistake you two for being on a date today - it was nothing more than an outing. 

You start with stationary for the upcoming term, then you drag Rin to the mall because you need some more clothes. After that, you go into a bookstore to pick up some manga. Rin has fun there because he gets to pick out some new releases and you bond mutually over your tastes. Rin learns both like thrillers. You spend a lot of time together, reading over his shoulder. 

It’s not a date. But it wasn’t bad. He’s so used to talking to you that the entire situation doesn’t feel uncomfortable at all. You’re funnier than he’s usually willing to give you credit for. Doing all that, plus train rides, makes it so you’re not home until sundown. You, however, refuse to end the night without having some kind of treat. After a lot of begging Rin to cheat on his meal plan, the two of you get ice-cream and you drag Rin to a local playground. Apparently you bring your neighbors' kids here sometimes. 

Now he’s here.  Sitting on swings with ice-cream and it is still not a date. Rin has no opinions on the day but you’re practically bursting at the seams with happiness. The dress you’re wearing is hiking up on your thigh from how you’re sitting. He was right to accompany you, by the way. The amount of creeps he’s had to stare down today alone is outright disgusting. 

Rin takes a spoonful of ice-cream and lets it melt in his mouth. You let your feet hit the mulch beneath you as you lick the ice-cream carefully - trying desperately not to let it spill on your hand. He watches on in amusement. After you finally get a handle on it, you give him a small look. 

“I had fun today,” You say sentimentally. Rin feels his stomach tie in knots “Thank you.”

He frowns. 

“Gross. Stop that.” 

“Aw, c’mon. You’re so edgy. Just admit you had fun! You had a fantastic and whimsical time.” 

He gives you an unimpressed stare. 

“Really? Nothing? You’re not feeling the flames of youthful joy in your loins at all?” 

“Describing it like that is disgusting.” 

“So you admit you know what it is.” 

Rin wants to smile. Fuck, he hates you. 

“...It wasn’t bad.” 

You grin. You’re so annoying.

“Ladies and gents, we got an ‘it wasn’t bad’ from the ever soulless Itoshi Rin!” 

Stupid. So stupid.

“It was more tolerable than hanging out with some of my other dipshit friends.” 

You clasp a hand over your mouth dramatically. 

“Oh…Oh wow… Do you want to try proposing next? The set-up is there. Perfect ambience.” 

His face cracks into a begrudging smile. 

“You’re insufferable.” 

You suddenly go quiet. When Rin looks at you, you’re stunned

“Why’re you being weird?” 

“No, sorry, I was just thinking I really like you,” You say, like it’s the easiest and most natural thing in the world “I’ve never seen you smile before. It’s nice.” 

“...Your ability to say cringy shit like that so easily is astounding to me.” 

“I don’t want to hear this from the guy who unironically uses lukewarm,” You say, biting into your ice-cream cone. Rin blushes. “Besides, nothing wrong with being cringe when you’re in love.” 

“Freak.” 

You give him a thumbs up. 

“One of a kind.” 

There’s a beat of silence. It’s comfortable. Rin eats his too, probably a little slower than he has to. Summer feels heavy in the air. 

“You weren’t always like..an edgelord, right?” 

Rin stares at you, perplexed by how sudden the question is. 

“Where’d you hear that from?” 

“Your mom after dinner. You already went upstairs. Said you had a nasty fight with your brother.” 

He doesn’t say anything, posture stiffening at the mention of Sae. 

“It’s not your business.” 

“Hey. No need for the attitude. I’m curious as your number one fan.” You say, trying to back off as much as possible. Like he’s some kind of feral cat you’re trying to calm. “Don’t be mad, okay? You don’t have to talk about it.” 

You try your best to be soothing and Rin softens 

He is angry. Not at you. Not really.  The mention of Sae just does that to him. And if anyone else even thought to bring it up - he’d probably tell them to go fuck themselves with nothing but bitter hatred. 

With you, there’s not any of that. There’s a lingering sense of hesitance - an internal conflict, but not anger. Rin’s never enjoyed opening his heart to anyone. 

Even so, he feels compelled to tell you, so he does.

“My brothers a dick,” Resentment seeps into his words “He came back from overseas and then basically insulted me for a minute straight. We were always meant to play soccer together but he went through something. He changed. We never talked about it,” 

“What? He insulted you for no reason? That’s so weird. Did you always have a bad relationship?” 

Rin sits with himself quietly. 

“I don’t know if we have one now. We were close as kids. At least.” 

“And he just… came back and started being an asshole to you? Seriously?” 

Rin nods. There’s not much else to the story. Rin’s tried hard not to think about the situation itself. He only uses the feelings that stayed behind to make him better. To give him a reason to play - it’s motivation and nothing more. If he starts to view it too much like what it is, betrayal, he’s afraid everything inside of him will collapse. 

“There’s probably more to it than that,” You conclude thoughtfully. Rin thinks the same “But still. You’re his baby brother. Even if he’s going through something…” 

Rin scoffs “You sound like you’re worried about him.” It comes out more petulantly than he expects 

“Not really. Not as much as I’m worried about you,” You counter, giving him a small smile. Rin feels his heart leap into his throat “I just figure, you know, maybe thinking about it like that would help. You were close right? Your mom said he used to dote on you,” 

Rin nods. He feels his chest swell and tighten. 

“Then…I bet it sucked. I bet it was hard. Or at least, it must’ve been lonely to go through that,” You say, frown deepening “Such a sudden change would be hard for anyone to deal with, I think. It’s okay if you feel like it’s unfair. His reasons aside.” 

You sigh, suddenly, covering your hands with your face. 

“What?” Rin asks. You shake your head. 

“You poor thing. I wanna hug you to death you know. A good squeeze. I’m trying to refrain.” You say, stomping your feet just slightly. He feels a flush crawl up his neck, turning his head to look away. 

“...It’s not like I’m stopping you.” 

He doesn’t have the courage to look at you. Not as he says it, or after to steal a glance of what face you're making. Instead, he hears the metal of the chain and feels the warmth of your body. It’s a tight hug. You’re standing and he’s sitting, your arms around his neck, his face directly against your chest. He widens his eyes. He wants to yell at you for being a defenseless idiot, but the feeling of being hugged so tightly washes the words away. You’re soft…and warm. He’s never been hugged by someone who isn’t his mom or brother before, and he can’t remember the last time either thing happened to him. You pat his head. 

Do you touch people like this often? So casually? Or is he special because you like him, he wants to ask. He wants to ask but doesn’t want to know the answer, pushing the feeling down as deep as he can make it go. He wraps his arms around you loosely, above your waist trying to be respectful.  

But he leans into the warmth. Like it’s something that happens once in a lifetime. 

“Hey, Rin.”  You say, soft. He can feel the warmth of your breath against his hair. 

“Hn.” 

“I hope you kick your brother's ass in soccer.” 

You sound teary. Weirdly, it makes Rin feel better. 

“Yeah.”

__ 

School starts up again during September. 

The autumn season welcomes warm colors, fallen leaves and the sort of cool weather that puts the summer uniforms back up on the hangers. Rin is listening to music when he spots you waiting for him at the gate, waving your hand at him. He has half a mind to ignore you, you’re so embarrassing. 

But before he can pretend not to see, you’re jogging over to him. He has to stand so you don’t end up bumping into him. You walk like you were born backwards, two left feet with such little awareness of your surroundings it stresses Rin out. 

He gives you a blank stare as you smile, securing your bag to your shoulder. 

“Look what the cat dragged in,” You say warmly. Rin pauses to look at you. You look different somehow. Lately you always do, Rin wonders if you’ve picked up some weird shape-shifting in your time apart “Are you excited for the new semester, hm? Hmm?” 

He keeps walking and you fall in step with him. You try but he’s too fast, so he slows just a little. He clicks his teeth, shaking his head, eyes taking in the view of the building in front him.

“Why would I be excited?” 

You shrug. 

“Because winter break  is close? Because there’s fun leaves outside? Because it’s your birthday in 6 days?”

He stops dead in his tracks. 

“What the hell? Why do you know that?” 

“Your mom told me.” You say, skipping along happily to school like you didn’t just say something insane. His frown deepens. 

“You have my moms number? You talk to my mom?” 

“She loves me,” You say casually, turning only to look at him and stick your tongue out “And she’s nice. Get over it.” 

With this, you rush into the building faster, giggling as you leave. Rin, frustrated, stomps after you. 

__

Your time together at lunch continues into fall. It’s the third day of the term, September 6th and you’re sitting by his side. The two of you eat in casual silence now, falling into a regular routine. There’s something about the whole ordeal that makes Rin feel a little funny. 

Friendship, as it stands, is still a lukewarm idea to him. But sprawled out next to you in a comfortable quiet isn’t the worst thing. The weather is cool enough to be nice and the daylight lasts for just the right amount of time to see sunset when he treks back home from practicing shooting into the net. 

That kind of sentimental viewing of his surroundings is a bad habit he’s picked up from you. He can’t seem to shake it off. He’s tried at least, but Rin has been stopping to look at everything nowadays. The sun, the trees, the cars passing. Everything passes right by his life, slowly. 

Eventually, eventually this whole thing will cease. You’ll never see Rin again and he’ll never see you - and you’ll part your separate ways. Thinking about that feels so stifling. But he figures since that’s the case, there’s probably not any harm in letting the time pass like this. As long as he’s still improving. 

Your voice doesn’t catch him off-guard anymore, no matter how loud it is after a long bout of silence. You stuff something into your mouth, a tomato he thinks. 

“Rin-kun,” You start, tilting your head to one-side “Are you doing anything for your birthday?” 

“No.” He answers immediately because he never does. He hasn’t done much since Sae left home and now that he’s a third year and about to be 18, there’s even less of a desire to pull together a party and celebrate. 

“What? Boo. That’s so lame.” 

“Don’t be so childish.” 

“I’m older than you, you dummy,” You say with such automation that Rin doesn’t even get the chance to process “You’re not even gonna have cake? Nothing?” 

“My mom might but I don’t have any plans.” 

“Your mom is so nice.” 

“Stop.” 

You frown at him but don’t say any more.  You look like you have something on your mind. Probably something stupid, but Rin can’t help but wonder what’s making your brow crease so intensely. 

“What?” He snips. You flick your eyes to him and shake your head. 

“I just think it’s a waste,” You say simply, that tone of fondness seeping into it that Rin can’t get used to. “It’s such a big number, you know? A little cake and some show tunes or something would suffice.” 

Rin scoffs. 

“I don’t care about it. It’s pointless to me. Lukewarm” He says, before noticing your genuine sadness. He sighs a little to himself “Stop looking like a depressed mutt.” 

“I’m not a dog.” 

“I guess dogs are more well-trained.’ 

“Hey. Hey, what the hell do you mean by that?” 

He ignores you. 

“Anyway, stop worrying about it.”

You pout. 

“Easier said than done.”. 

__ 

Rin’s morning routine has been the exact same for two years. 

He starts by opening the window, to let fresh air and sunlight come in through the glass. He feels like his room gets stale overnight and it wakes him up to taste the sun in the back of his mouth. He takes a deep breath of it, clearing out his lungs and blinking his eyes open. 

After that he stretches. He unfurls a Bluelock brand yoga mat onto his carpeted floor and gets to his usual cycle. It’s integral for an athlete to keep their muscles stretched, functioning like a well-oiled machine. He has it down pat. He starts from the bottom up, stretching his legs and working up to his arms and shoulders. His legs always come first since he’s a striker, always focusing on the mobility of his calves and foot before he stretches out his thigh.

His core, then his chest and arms. When he’s done with all that - he practices yoga for fifteen minutes. Again with mobility but this time full body, like making sure each of his limbs work with each other without any stops. He’ll sit back down after those minutes are up to meditate for another fifteen - clear his mind of absolutely anything stuck in it. It’s the most peace he gets on any given day. 

At the end, he sits with his feelings. Carefully, he undoes the wrapped clothed box around his heart and stares at it as it sits in his lap. Beating and raw and melancholy blue  - so full of sadness and anger like it could burst at any minute. Revisiting his sadness and rage is a necessity. Sometimes it feels like only sadness. Only monochrome. 

(He wonders if a day will come where that part of his routine is changed. If ever, he’ll unwrap his own heart only to see it pink or golden yellow or even a softer shade of red. He wonders if the colors ever change, or if time will fade them.) 

All of this happens before he even brushes his teeth. The rest of his morning routine is keeping his room neat. He folds the comforter on his bed, puts any dirty clothes away, and gets dressed. He doesn’t really style his hair - it’s so pin straight after washing he normally just has to brush it to keep it nice. 

After that he has breakfast, and checks through his bag. On days he has school he goes to school and comes back to practice. If he’s home alone - he picks one of many other things to do. He tends to practice closer to evening, taking a shower before he goes to sleep. 

On the morning of Rin’s 18th birthday, he’s only really acutely aware of the date. His morning starts the exact same as it has everyday for nearly two years. Nothing to make him feel particularly different. When he looks in the mirror, he still sees his brother's face and when he looks at his heart it’s still a steely, melancholy blue. 

When he comes down stairs, though - there’s a pair of shoes he doesn’t recognize. And there’s a humming traveling down the hall and always the way up towards him that he knows quite well. 

He thinks, for a minute, he might still be dreaming. Why you would be in his house on a Saturday morning makes absolutely no sense otherwise. 

He slips his feet into his gray slippers and treks into the living room, only to find you in view of the open kitchen. There’s a balloon attached to flowers and a spread of fruits on the table. Orange juice in a cold glass. You with his moms borrowed apron, humming contentedly as you bend over the stove. 

Rin doesn’t know what the feeling is. He doesn’t know if he’s irritated or not. Just that it’s so overwhelming to see you in his kitchen, marching to the beat of your own drum like you always do. 

“What the hell are you doing in my house?” 

You startle when you hear his voice, whipping around to face him. Dramatically putting a hand on your chest - you shoot him an unfriendly glare. 

“Well hello to you too.” 

“Answer my question.” He demands. You click your teeth. 

“Well, obviously I’m making breakfast. We’re celebrating your birthday.” 

“Without telling me.” 

You snap your fingers before giving him finger guns “Precisely. Genius deduction, Itoshi-sama.” 

“What the fuck. Where are my parents.” 

“They’re out on a day-trip! It’s a Saturday. They’ll be back here on Sunday afternoon. Read the note.” 

“What were you gonna do if I had last minute plans?” 

“You don’t though?” You say like knowing that is so obvious. He knows you asked but still “I guess I’d turn around and make my own breakfast. Give you your gift at school or something.” 

“Why are you here?” He asks a little softer this time. With a little more emotion, just a touch. He never expects anyone to make a fuss about his birthday. 

Rin doesn’t really ask for much. Certainly wouldn’t ask for this on his own accord. That’s a vain thing to do, right? 

It occurs to Rin that this is the kind of birthday you do for someone you like. Someone you love. You’re always confessing your feelings to him. You only say it when you’re sure. It wasn’t like Rin didn’t know you had feelings for him, because the point of it all had been for you to try and get rid of them. Or honor them, or deal with them in whatever way you saw fit. Rin had agreed on a whim to help you with that. Your friendship had started with the very notion that you liked Itoshi Rin and he didn’t like you back. It’s not some secret. 

When the light pours in through the windows and hits your back and for the first time - Rin understands what the fuss is about being in love is. He’s sure that this strange, grotesque warmth is the aftermath of being liked. He always thought it’d feel more simple. That he’d remain unmoved in the face of it because he was different.

It’s not like he’s unloved. He’s sure his parents love him. His brother did too. Still does, Rin thinks. 

But it’s the first time someone has made their feelings so clear to him. Someone who isn’t supposed to love or like him. And even Rin, chronically apathetic, can’t bring himself to ignore the weight of knowing that. He stares at you, dumbstruck. 

You’re still turned to him. There’s a cool tumbler of iced-coffee sitting on the counter that you sip, head tilted to one side. 

“Well, I don’t know,” You start, a hand on your hip “It just felt like too much of a waste to do nothing on your birthday. But you’re not the kind of guy who likes big celebrations. So I thought maybe just hanging out would be more your speed.”

Rin swallows. “Seriously?” 

“Seriously.”

“Bold thing to assume.” 

You frown back. 

“Well, I was gonna invite Isagi-kun—“

“Isagi? How do you know Isagi?”

“He saw me leaving your house ‘cause he was gonna visit.  After we talked he followed me on Instagram. Anyway, I was gonna invite him and Bachira and all four of us could go to a movie,” You explain as you sigh and go back to the stove “But he said you’d probably just want to hang out with me.” 

“…And he didn’t say anything else?”

“Well he asked if we were dating so I just told him the truth. Really nice guy, by the way.” 

Rin’s going to hound Isagi next time they practice together. 

“So. Now you’re here… doing what exactly?”

“Making you breakfast. I’ll make you ochazuke for lunch later. Haven’t decided on dinner, I thought I’d ask when you woke up. Your mom said you liked traditional breakfast but I didn’t think I’d be done by the time you woke up so there’s fruit.” 

Sure enough, when Rin walks over to the other side of the table - there’s a half done spread of breakfast on the table. All the dining ware is set up neatly, the table arranged so well he feels guilty for not helping. 

“You didn’t have to do all this for me.” Rin tsks, a frown on his expression as he stands next to you. He watches you pour egg into a square pan, slowly evening out the layers. 

“I wanted to,” You reply, not thinking twice about it. “I enjoy cooking for people. It’s fun. I normally just do it to feed myself, so it’s nice to share.” 

He closes his eyes. 

“Thanks.” 

He’s afraid to look over at you, the excitement radiating off of you. It makes him uncomfortable that something so simple could make you so happy. 

“Can you repeat that?” 

“Don’t start.” 

“Rin-chan,” You coo, immediately making him so embarrassed he wants to hit you “You’re so docile today.” 

“I’m gonna kill you.” He says, hitting your shoulder as light as he can. 

“Woah…how romantic. Dying on the day you were born? Jeez. I’m swooning.” 

He looks at you blankly. 

“Stop being gross. Where did you even get that from?” 

“Too many things to count,” You say with a snap. He shakes his head. 

“Is there anything I can help with?” 

“How diligent. It’s fine! It’s your birthday, right? Sit. Eat some fruit. Pick out what you wanna do. I rented some games and there’s some movies I had in mind too. Make your agenda. “

Rin laughs to himself, lightly. 

“Isn’t that supposed to be your job?” 

“Don’t be stingy! I’m already making breakfast.”

Rin rolls his eyes.

“Yeah. Whatever.” 

__

You end up back in Rin’s room. 

After a healthy discussion about what he would like to do - Rin landed on wanting to do both. He picked out a copy of Resident Evil  to play until after lunch and then decided to binge a bunch of movies after. 

You even agree to accompany him while he practices. There’s 24 hours in a day and the plans are nothing more than vague suggestions - but deep down, it makes Rin kind of…well whatever. It’s not a bad plan. 

Currently, you’re sitting at the foot of Rin’s bed with your hands tight around the controller of his PS4. Rin feels a little bad for you. While you do okay with horror movies, the immersion of horror games seems to frighten you enough that your eyes are glued onto the screen. As such, Rin is trying his best not to startle you as you lean forward every so slightly. The leg of your pants is pushed up just barely. You’re dressed cozy, so it’s funny seeing your head shrink into your hoodie. 

“Why the fuck would you set it hardcore if this BOTH of our first times playing,” You whine, turning yourself into the next room carefully on screen “I’m scared.” 

“You’re such a wuss,” He scoffs, leaning back from where he’s sitting next to you on his bed. “We’re never gonna make any progress like this.” 

You stomp your feet and Rin resists the urge to laugh. 

“Shut up, it’s scary.” 

He nudges your shoulder with his knee. 

“Stop complaining. You got to pick the character and I got to pick the difficulty.” 

“I deserve to lust after Leon after the shit I’m getting put through,”

Rin scoffs at your declaration. The irritation is softened when you walk into the backroom faced with a zombie - a short scream leaving your lips as you mash buttons and use your gun to kill it quickly. You manage to dodge as much damage as you can, obviously trying not to waste limited resources. Even so it takes damn near 7 bullets. Despite your cowardice, you’re pretty good at the game. 

You loot the room for any possible supplies then leave. You turn the corner of the isle, a zombie filled gas station awaiting you. You manage to save bullets and stun the one closest to you before getting your shit completely rocked - quick to duck out. The first cut scene of the game comes next where you meet the other main character Claire. You gasp like you’ve been running, shoving the controller towards Rin. 

“Your turn. Move, I wanna sit on your bed.” 

“Why?” 

“Cause it’s a weekend and I have a right to be lazy. Shoo. On the floor.” 

“You’re getting way too comfortable in my house on my birthday.” 

Rin, does, go sit on the floor where you were. Mostly because it’s a better position to play the game in. At least it has minimal back support. The cut scene plays in the background, nothing difficult as the main characters go to the next area - the police station and the technical start of the game. Rin hasn’t played the remake, but he did longingly watch some playthroughs while he was in Bluelock during its release. 

He had never mentioned it to you, so he was shocked you knew enough about it to bring it over. He likes survival horror and he was always wanting to play it. 

“Me and your mom are best friends so I practically live here anyways. Also shut-up and look.” 

He does shut up, too invested in the story to be annoyed.  The main characters get separated and Leon ends up in the streets. 

For whatever reason, he’s conscious about proximity. Your knee next to his shoulder. You’re close enough to touch him casually and he’s wondering…hoping to know if you’re naive enough to do it without thinking. It feels like a stroke of luck, or maybe a form of mind-reading when you reach for his hair with your fingers. He wonders if you’re doing it on purpose. He thinks he should tell you to stop. 

But when you ask “Is this okay?” 

He can’t find the strength in himself to do it. He focuses on the scene in front of him, weaving through the cars to shake off a horde of zombies. Rin grabs the controls, immediately turning around to try and stun a group of zombies before turning into the gate so he can head to the station.

His heart is racing and his eyes almost feel cross from how much he’s focusing but it’s not exactly the game. The game isn’t even that scary, as much as it’s gory he thinks. 

“I don’t care but,” He says through a breath, trying to sound like he means it and that he’s not so conscious of the way your pinky lingers on his nape “when’d you get so touchy?” 

“I like touching you.” You reply, twirling a strand of hair around your fingers “Your hair is so silky and nice. I felt when I gave you a hug that one time and I kept thinking about it.” 

Rin wants to say “Do you think about me that much?” but the words don’t come out how he wants. 

“Do you touch everyone like this?” 

You’re silent for a minute. It takes patience, effort - not to turn his head to see the look on your face. Though he probably knows it. He thinks he just wants affirmation from you. 

“...No. Not really. I just like you.” 

There’s a beat of silence - a pause designated for his rejection, the promise he made to you so many months ago. He knows what the script is. And he’s said it many times before. Not in a million years, right? 

But he can’t bring himself to say it this time, so he doesn’t.

“Yeah. I know.” 

___

Before Rin knows it, the day is coming to a close. 

The entirety of it you spend together, with you faithfully stuck to him and without Rin feeling entirely suffocated. He isn’t sure why it’s so easy with you. Normally this much socialization would render him exhausted. Irritable at best and angry at worst. But he’s not. In fact even after his entire workout routine, he felt fine listening to you ramble. He didn’t need complete silence, but even when there were lulls and dips - it didn’t feel uncomfortable. 

You didn’t get far in Resident Evil 2. Rin decides to cut it short since it’d definitely take a lot longer than all the time you had and there were movies he wanted to watch. When you whine about not being able to finish - he quietly told  you to just come over next time and play it with him then. 

He waited a year, so he can wait a little longer. Your face lit up idiotically, giddy with delight at the promise of next time. As promised, ochazuke was for lunch and after 30 minutes of digestion - he put it out of his mind as he did his daily drills. You joined him, insisting that you’d be fine doing nothing. Sat on the field with a book the entire time even though it was cold, tossing him his things whenever he took a break - smiling each time he talked to you. 

(“You know you don’t actually need to stay with me the entire day.” He reminds you of this as he brings a bottle of water to lips, sweat dripping down the side of his head even in the cool weather. You turn your head up at him. 

“When else am I gonna get to stick by your side all day? This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.” 

“You’re so good at being annoying it’s impressive,” He says, dropping his water bottle back down “Aren’t you bored?” 

“Huh? No way. I have my fun book to keep me company and on top of that I get to see you play in the flesh.” 

Oh, yeah. You mentioned watching him when he was in Bluelock. “Well, it’s not like a match. But I’m not gonna keep asking, so whatever.” 

“Yes, yes - I understand. Now go, shoo.”)

Even though Rin practiced for his usually long amount of hours, you sat with him diligently - even stopping to cheer him on when you needed a break from reading or studying or whatever else you were doing. 

Upon returning, he went to shower and you went to warm up in  the kitchen. After he was redressed and clean, he joined you downstairs to order take-out and have dinner. 

Finally, it’s after dinner and you’ve banished Rin to his room while you set something up downstairs. He’s mostly scrolling twitter, watching soccer highlights from the accounts he follows. He’s just about comfortable when you finally call him back down, which irritates him enough to click his teeth but not enough to bring it up to you. 

After a long day, when Rin finally comes back down stairs, walking down into the hall and back into the living room - he can’t help but be surprised at the change in scenery. All the lights have been turned low, and everything looks different. You’ve taken to decorating a wall of his living room after some rearranging. A white sheet hanging up with something, and a plethora of fairy lights in stripes going down it in a nice pattern. 

There’s a banner and it looks hand-made. It spells out happy birthday, rin in neat, thick blue letters on cut-out white shapes, attached along the back wall. On the table in front, there’s some decoration along with nice paper plates and plastic cutlery and a cake in the middle that’s nicer than he’s expecting. 

You beam at him as he walks in. And you’re stupid enough to be wearing a birthday hat, giving him jazz hands as he enters. 

“Happy birthday!” 

On paper, Rin thinks it’s been something of a boring birthday. He did what he normally would do on a day off but you cooked for him twice. He spent most of it with you, even though it was a lot of nothing. A lot of being together like you were roommates or something. Maybe that's why he’s so reluctant to admit that this is making him feel something. 

That the silly theatrics feel meaningful. It is thoughtful, isn’t it? Rin doesn’t think anyone in his entire life has done anything this thoughtful for him. Birthdays are birthdays, and they’ve never really been especially meaningful. He didn’t see the point in just celebrating the day of someone's birth. Certainly, he doesn’t think he’d have it in himself to do something like this for another person. 

Rin stares at you. Wearing a stupid birthday hat and the most gleeful, idiotic smile he’s ever seen. All of this for a guy who’s rejected you, but you seem to cherish so much anyways. Apathetic and ungraceful as he is and always will be - he’s so overwhelmed he doesn’t know what to do. What a strange, unrecognizable feeling welling up inside of him. And not even one feeling, but so many so tangled with each other - he can’t see anything straight. His eyes aren’t drawn to the candlelight, or the moon, or the cake. 

It’s like a sense of tunnel vision. Where all Rin can really look at is you. It’s happened before. How can anyone be like this, he wonders. Are there people born into the world so unselfishly? And if they are, why would he ever cross paths with them? How could someone so easy to love have any business loving him, in the first place? 

Rin won’t ever understand you. He accepts that. He’ll never be able to understand this kind of person. Someone who shines even brighter than the sun. 

But he’s not so stupid to not understand himself. He’s unable to say the words he’d promised to you all the way in April. Rin doesn’t like to lie. 

He would be lying, that is, if you told him just one more time that you liked him.  He’d be lying if it told you it’ll never happen. He’d be lying if he said he doesn’t like you. And it’s not just because you like him, because that never mattered to him in the first place. 

Some people are made to be adored. Born special and bright like everything should revolve around them. Perhaps that kind of thing is only afforded to people without ego. With heart and character and charisma. 

It doesn’t matter. What a stupid thing to realize on his birthday of all days.

“Rin-kun?” 

He blinks. 

“Where’d you hide all of this?” 

You laugh at him, bubbly and delighted.

“I brought it in a tote and kept it in the kitchen. Mostly stuff from my house, and your mom helped with the cake and stuff. It’s nice right? I did a good job, no?” 

Ah. He’s fucked. 

“It looks okay.” 

You frown, huffing and puffing “Just okay? C’mon, don’t be stingy.” 

“Doesn’t begging for compliments defeat the purpose of them.” 

“Not to me,” 

Your frown deepens and Rin is starting to feel the rose colored glasses set in. 

“It’s nice. It’s good.” 

“So you like it? You’re happy? Delighted, even? Absolutely overjoyed by-” 

“Cut it out or I’m going to send you home.” 

“No,” You whine, tugging on his sleeves like you’re worried he really will “I want cake.” 

“Then let’s cut the cake?”

“We can’t,” You put your arms up in a cross and Rin gives you a look of confusion. “I promised I’d get a good picture of you.” 

“What? Promised who?” 

“Your parents, mostly. But also, you should post on your Instagram a little more, no? You’re basically a famous player already, you should have the courtesy to feed your fans.” 

Before he can do anything to protest, you usher Rin to sit on the other side of the table before you back with his phone. He stares at you but you only look at him expectantly. Still, he unlocks it and hands it to you. He gives you an irritated sigh (though he isn’t really irritated). 

“This is stupid.” 

“It’s a good thing to capture memories, you dummy. Now smile,” You say, holding up the camera after some angling “Or don’t. The people do love a good scowl.” 

That makes him want to smile. He’s awkward in the photos but he does stay still for them, trying his best not to look ridiculous. You take a few, then pause to come up to the table and light the candles in front of him. He hears the camera shutter one more time before you look up at him over the edge. 

“Ready to blow out your candles?” 

“I guess.” 

Before Rin can do anything about it, he listens to you sing happy birthday - poorly with too much enthusiasm. You’re tone deaf and passionate all at the same time - singing each word with a dramatic flair until you’re on the final word. You can’t clap because you’re recording but you do cheer as he burns the candles out. Once it’s over you stop recording, looking down and swiping through the pictures. 

“They turned out good. You should post them.” 

“...You’re done taking them?” 

You tilt your head to one side. 

“Yeah?” 

“We didn’t get any together.” 

Your eyes widen like he said something shocking. 

“...You wanna take them together?” 

He scoffs. 

“We spent the whole day together.” 

You flush, suddenly embarrassed and god. 

“I just wasn’t expecting you to want that. I mean we’re friends but-” 

“Shut up. And come here.” 

So you do, phone still in hand as you mess with your appearance.

“Do you want to take it or do you want me to?” 

“Oh, uh lemme just-” You go through a bunch of filters and find one before handing it to him, a nervous expression “You take it cause your arm is longer and you’re taller.” 

Rin just nods. Takes the phone from you,  and lets you pose a little before he takes the photo. He hands it back to you so you can see, and watches your eyes light up as you stare at it. Stupid. 

“It came out nice.” You say. You save it onto his phone before handing it back to him. “Send it to me later?” 

“Yeah.” 

You give him another grin and Rin takes his phone from you, going through the pictures as he opens up Instagram. He guess it wouldn’t hurt to post. You leave his side, saying something about cutting the cake. But he isn’t looking, really. 

He drafts a post as he waits for you. He likes the picture you took together best and decides to put it second. He never has any idea on how to caption these which is why he doesn’t want to post it in the first place. He glances at you, then sighs internally. 

itoshirin._ posted for the first time in a while.  posted 7 mins ago. liked by isagi_yoichi, bachiraaaaa, and others.  itoshirin._ ; 09.09.2002. thanks for everything, stupid.  isagi_yoichi commented: no way you’re getting a girlfriend before me. life is so unfair and cruel.  isagi_yoichi commented: oh happy birthday btw bachiraaaaa commented: RIN-CHAN !!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY ٩(◕‿◕｡)۶ official_itoshisae: happy birthday.  itoshirinsnumberonefan: WHO IS THAT??  yo_hiori: happy birthday! 

“Rin, I cut the cake!” 

He puts his phone on DND before taking a plate of cake from your hand. 

__

The clock strikes two, and you’re still at Rin’s place. 

After a long binge of horror movies, you’re both comfortably in each other's space - only inches away, talking about nothing. The movie ended a little over half an hour ago.

He’s still doing just that, listening to you chatter away next to his ear. The room is completely dark minus the soft glow of the T.V. which gives just enough light for Rin to gaze at your face. Your eyes are wide and sparkly, still, even though it seems like the tiredness is getting to you too. 

Neither of you wants to stop talking. You’ve started discussing manga - particularly Rin's favorite manga. 

“Ciguatera was interesting,” You say, hugging one of his pillows close to your chest.  “I wasn’t sure what to expect.” 

“I’m shocked you read it. Seriously. I thought you would’ve  forgotten the minute after I told you.” 

“Well, yeah. You recommended it, so obviously I wanted to at least try,” You say with a breathless laugh, turning over to face him. You’re facing each other, he realizes a second too late “You’re such a boy, by the way. Weekly young magazine? Really.” 

“Shut up.” He says, with no real bite to his words “What were you expecting?” 

“Dunno. Didn’t think you were interested in romance of all things. Especially cause Ogino’s kind of a loser.” 

“There was other stuff in it.” He points out. You chuckle. 

“Yeah. Way raunchier and darker than I thought. But it was mostly about romance. So, I was surprised to say the last.” 

“What,” Rin starts, partially offended by the implication “Do you think I'm a soulless machine or something?” 

“Well no,” You frown, shaking your head as you stare at him “But you’ve rejected every confession you’ve ever gotten, even from some of the prettiest girls in our entire grade. So I didn’t think you had any interest in that kinda thing.”

He scoffs.”You’re stupid.” 

“You tell me all the time,” You point your fingers and place them under your chin. “Why did you reject them, by the way? Just trying to focus on soccer?” 

He feels flush, explaining. Turning his gaze to the ceiling, he sighs. 

“None of those people actually had feelings for me. It wasn’t meaningful in any way.” 

“And you want it to be meaningful?” 

“There’s no point being in a relationship with someone I don’t like and barely know. And who doesn’t really care to get to know me. I’m busy enough with soccer, and I don’t have time to entertain lukewarm relationships like that.” 

“What an unexpectedly sentimental reason. How soft of you Rin-kun.” 

“Shut up.” 

There’s a pause of thoughtful silence where you hum and lay flat on your back, reaching your hand up towards the ceilings. Rin can’t do much more than look. 

“You know. How I said I’ve been watching you since you were in Bluelock?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Y’know. I always thought you looked really sad back then. I might’ve been reading too much into it but,” You smile, corners of your lips upturned while you giggle “It’s like…weirdly relieving to see you like this.” 

“Like what?” 

“You’re like…just a boy,” You say wispy and delighted “A normal boy who reads shitty raunchy magazines and thinks about love. It’s comforting somehow. Makes me feel special. I really like you. A little more every day, it feels like.” 

Another beat of silence. He thinks you can sense the hesitance of his rejection. There’s such a tangible shift in the atmosphere. If Rin stretches his hand out to touch it, he thinks he’d push through an impossible barrier and keep falling in it forever. He thinks it would swallow him. 

He isn’t sure what it is. If it’s an act of bravery, or a sudden uptick in adrenaline, or if the exhaustion of a long day is finally starting to hit. Maybe it’s just these feelings that keep overwhelming him that make his body move. Something outside of his mind, nestled in his ribs, that has him inching closer to you. 

He flips until he’s hovering over you. Your eyes widen and you stare at him. He stares back, like he almost can’t believe himself. 

“Rin-kun?” 

And he freezes. The confidence dissipates as soon as he finds it but now he’s above you, on top of you. You’re messy and flush from the day. Your mascara is smudged and your lipgloss is gone - leaving a faint sheen on your mouth that matches your skin. Your hoodie is rumpled around the shoulders - one of the sleeves pulled to your elbows. Rin really gets a look at you. Cognizant of the fact he spent all day with you. That’s why you look worn and sleepy and so unbelievably cute. So cute it annoys him. Irritates him half to death. 

You open your mouth again, only to close it. It almost feels like he can hear your heart. Or maybe it’s his. It’s hard to know the difference. 

“Is this a n-new kind of bullying?” You joke, trying to ease the tension. He frowns at you. 

“Does it seem like I’m joking?” 

Your eyes widen and you turn away. Rin wants to make you look. 

“Well no but…” And you squirm a little “what are you doing?”

He doesn’t know, either. 

“I don’t know.” He admits, and you laugh a little breathless and the tension is so thick Rin can’t swallow around it “I want to kiss you.” He blurts out. Awkward and uncharismatic and clumsy. 

A bout of silence.

“...Am I going insane? Did you just say you want to kiss me?”

“I did.” 

More silence. 

“Why? Wouldn’t that make me your first kiss?” 

“It would.” 

“And isn’t that like… reserved for your special someone?” 

“It is.” 

“Rin-kun,” You breathe out, blinking in disbelief  “Do you even know what you’re saying?” 

“I do.”

You’re a little more serious this time. You put your hand on his shoulder. He feels like the Earth is gonna fall from under his feet. 

“Stop messing with me.” 

“I’m not.” 

You frown. 

“Do you really want to kiss me?” 

“Yeah,” He can’t think “I do.” 

You reach up for him. You’re more experienced with this kind of thing and it shows as you cup the nape of his neck. He doesn’t finch. He doesn’t look away from you either, as your thumb brushes under his eyes - the both of you so wrapped up in each other nothing matters. Rin would stay in this forever, if someone gave him the option.

“W-we have to talk about this afterwards, okay?”

“Okay.” 

“I’m serious, Itoshi Rin. Because you can’t just—” 

Your palm cups his cheek and he rubs against it instinctively. He sees your eyes widen and you swallow - a frown still etched into your features. 

“I know. I’m sorry.” 

Your voice goes as soft as a whisper. 

“You’re so unfair.” 

He almost laughs. 

“Please kiss me.” He asks, so silently it almost goes unheard but he knows you hear it because your lips press into a thin line before you’re pulling Rin down towards you. Your lips are soft. And warm. And they taste faintly like whip-cream and the slight sour of strawberries and your hands are so gentle. Somehow he feels at ease even though he feels like he’s going to implode on himself from nerves. 

Just a little deeper before you pull away and stare at him. Rin looks back, eyes jumping from your lips up to your eyes and back down to your lips. You open your mouth to say something. Mumbling his given name only for him to cut you off with another kiss, a little deeper this time. The way it shuts you up is so cute it almost makes him angry. How it muffles your words, tapers off into a noise of surprise and ends up just back at a kiss. 

He’s never felt like this kind of thing was a viable option. Itoshi Rin is an antisocial, angry, and apathetic soccer protege and he has no time in the world for anything lukewarm. He’s rejected every confession he’s ever received in his life and always thought of relationships as something far off and disconnected to him in his entirety.

Perpetually unloveable but maybe not in such an angsty, vulnerable way. Like a law of the universe. A truth, like thinking of him, means to postulate that he is that way. A prerequisite to understanding him. 

Rin doesn’t like things that are half-ass. Perhaps, part of the reason he likes you so much is because you’ve proved him wrong in such an utterly defeating way. The fact your very existence is by and large, the antithesis of this truth. 

Itoshi Rin is not only loveable, but he is capable of loving. There is evidence of it, right underneath him now - with soft lashes and wet eyes and the brightest smile that could ever exist. 

And it’s haunting for more reasons than one. But he likes how unyielding the revelation is. You’re worried he’ll want to avoid it, and he does. But he doesn’t think he could forever, even if he tried. 

He’s confident if he made the attempt, you’d come barreling towards him once more. With all the confidence in the world. It makes him want to at least try to face it.

Which is why he’s kissing you a second, third, and fourth time. Which is why he’s looking at you in between, wide blue eyes transfixed on every part of your face. He’s trying to face what daunts him most, not like but love and the difference is more important as the days pass. 

You pull away, finally - put a hand on his chest and stare. 

“Rin-kun,” You whisper, uncertain of yourself which he hates. “I like you. I really like you.” And again, a little softer “And I want you to like me too,” Like that had been the biggest secret of all. Something you’d never told anyone, even once. 

Rin can’t imagine it. Have you been holding in something like this all this time? He only realized a couple hours ago and it already feels like he’s going to rip apart at the seams. 

“I do. I do like you.”

“Really? Forreal? Seriously? You’re not pulling my leg? Yanking my chain?” 

He knocks his forehead against yours. 

“Be quiet. How can you be this stupid in the middle of getting confessed to?” 

You pout. Pout at him, all whiny. God. 

“It doesn’t feel real to me.” 

He laughs humorlessly. “It’s all a dream. You’ll forget it all in the morning.” 

“Stop being mean to me.” 

He has to be. If he’s not you’re going to see right through him. 

“No,” He says instead “Stop being so ridiculous first.” 

“An impossible ask to the world's most ridiculous girl.” 

He smiles a little. 

“That’s a good name for you. I’ll change your contact.” 

“Nooo,” You say again, this time pulling him down for a hug. His eyes widened. And he’s unfair? “Be nice to your girlfriend.” 

He doesn’t have anything to say to that. It flusters him too, admittedly. Before he can think of a counter, you yawn big and wide. Rin is still on top of you and neither of you have brushed your teeth. He was planning on putting you up in the guest room, but currently you’re clinging to him half-away. And he has no such plans of telling you to move. 

“I’m so tired.” 

Rin feels like he’s going to pass out, He mumbles. 

“You can sleep.” 

“Want you to sleep too.” 

Rin closes his eyes. He couldn’t refuse even if he wanted to. You’ll have to talk about it in the morning. 

“Okay.” 

__ 

“Rin? Where’s your frie—oh!” 

Rin stirs the minute his mom enters the room. It only takes him a minute to regain consciousness and by the time he’s awake - he’s already regretting not locking his door. 

He continues to pretend to be asleep. He thinks you still are because you’re comfortably slotted in his arms. Rin is so embarrassed he wants to die. He hears his mom gasp, and then quietly shouts for his father to come to his room. 

“What are you—oh.” 

Rin is going to have the worst morning of his life whenever they leave. He remains still. He hears the shutter of a camera and grits his teeth all the way in the back of his jaw. 

“Oh this will make a great wedding photo.” 

His dad laughs a little to himself, ushering his mother out of the room “Don’t get carried away,” 

When the door finally clicks, Rin opens his eyes and lets out a breath of relief. Much to his shock, he also feels you stir. His eyes widen when you turn to him, your face painted in utter mortification before you bury it in your hands. He stares at you as you groan, kicking your feet. 

“Oh god I’m going to cry. How am I going to face her? Oh my god” 

Rin scoffs a little at your dramatics. It calms him down in a strange way “She’s not gonna say anything to you. She’s probably only going to bully me about it.” 

“I’ve forsaken you, mother-in-law” 

Rin nudges your ribs, blush crawling up his face. 

“Shut up.” 

__ 

Up until three weeks ago, Rin didn’t take issue with the way you interacted at school. 

You two have a pretty strict policy about it. Though you’re in the same class and you chat occasionally in the halls - you tend to avoid Rin where you can. Originally, this made sense. For the sake of his comfort and yours, the best choice was sneaking to the roof together to eat where you could remain mostly undisturbed. 

As such, Rin has never been particularly consciousness of your presence in the classroom. For starters, you’re always somewhere. A busybody of the highest pedigree and always running errands - even if Rin were to try to talk to you he can only really find you 20 percent of the time. Secondly, unlike Rin, you have a handful of friends surrounding you. Rin has interacted with them very briefly but you (seemingly for his sake) try not to force him out of his comfort zone too much by making you all sit together. The most Rin has gotten from them is a single knowing smirk or glance. 

And lastly, before three weeks ago, it would’ve been a big problem if people started getting onto either of you about a relationship that didn’t exist. That would've been all around awkward and uncomfortable and maybe would’ve deterred your future endeavors with other guys. 

That was when you and Itoshi Rin were in fact not dating. 

Three weeks into your relationship and nothing much has changed, though nowadays you come over to his house on weekends where you can. You’ve even been on one date after his dad (of all people) hounded him about never taking you on a proper one. 

You text the same as you did before, and you call Rin a little more often. Usually for the purposes of rambling so much you tucker yourself out and fall asleep. 

But at school, Rin only really sees you for the spare minutes of lunch and not much more than that. He’s never really thought about it before. It was never enough of an issue to warrant his intervention. 

It’s not like he cares, okay? 

But he’s more aware of it, now - frustratingly enough. You really don’t see each other often enough in school and you have many more guy friends than he had ever considered before. Every time he catches you and Murata-senpai trekking down the hall he feels his blood pressure rise. 

You and Rin have both decided, though. Despite his posting of you, neither of you have confirmed the relationship. Rin is immune to the prying and you’re good at dodging it altogether. This is the agreement. 

It is therefore very irrational of him to be thinking of speaking up at this current moment in time. 

Despite your mutual decision to keep things as private as possible, Rin has heard nothing but gossip about the situation for weeks. Outside of the usual, direct kind of prying - there’s whispers and stares and all sorts of other things. Rin doesn’t care about it. He’s used to it, it’s part of the gig and the neo-egoist league made him near immune. 

It’s all the things directed at you that make him seethe. Misplaced jealousy and the disappointed remarks of guys in class that make him feel like his blood pressure is rising. The latter is what’s making him most irritated now. How fucking long are these idiots going to talk about this? 

“Dude, you had like three years to confess,” Some idiot, who’s name Rin doesn’t know is still yapping “If she’s actually dating Mr.Popular then it’s on you for fucking yourself over.” 

The other idiot in question groans, and Rin forces his face to remain impassive as he listens. He tries to stop listening. More than once, actually. But they just keep going. 

“I didn’t think he’d actually do it dude. Like there’s no way, right? He rejected every single girl who ever confessed to him. I thought she was safe. And now my highschool love is forever ruined.” 

Like he ever stood a chance. How ridiculous. 

Another one of the goons speaks up “Dunno. Neither of them have said anything right? You miss all of the shots you don’t take.” 

“Are you saying I should just confess to her anyway? She got posted on his Instagram dude.” 

A smirk appears on Extra Three’s face “No confirmation means fair game. Stop being pussy and do it.” 

“You think I stand a chance against that dude?” 

Rin can feel all three pairs' eyes hit him at once. 

“Nah. Not a chance. But you could always wait till she’s all heartbroken and comfort her, right? Hook, line, and sinker.” 

“I hear when girls are heartbroken they’re like way more likely to let you—” 

With that, Rin stands to his feet. He’s seething. It’s ridiculous. It’s stupid. He should definitely just leave to go cool his head but he’s so fucking angry it’s hard to sit still and he has no other way of dealing with his feelings. So he walks towards the table slowly, eyes darkened and just barely holding it in

He knows this is a bad idea. He can feel the whole classroom look at him as he slams his hand down on the desk. But he doesn’t care. He’ll deal with it later. 

“You’d be fucking lucky if my girlfriend ever looked your way.” 

As soon as Rin says it, there's a thud at the door-way of the classroom. When he looks up you’re there with your eyes widened. Rin just looks back, impassive and immune to the sudden uproar of whispers. 

He only clicks his teeth when you grab him by the sleeve of his uniform - cracking a small smile as he hears the faint words “Just give up dude.” as he leaves. 

__ 

Up on the roof top, you’re shaking Rin by the shoulders - visibly distressed. 

“Hey! What the hell was that?” 

“What.” He offers, not willing to budge on the situation. In the first place he’s a little irritated by all of it. And he’s a little irritated by how much you’ve been enforcing the no-talking rule. Right now, it really feels like he can’t take it anymore. 

You frown deeply, distress only growing as the time passes in uncomfortable silence. Rin doesn’t want to be civil about it. About it and about you and about those idiots. 

“We had an agreement!” You say, grabbing him by the front of his shirt, though it’s weak. He stares down at you. 

“So what?” 

“Rin, we talked about this. Don’t be like this.” 

“Like what.” 

“Pissy and weird. You’re being weird and I don’t like it. It’s making me sad.” 

“How am I being—” 

Before Rin can proceed with his sentence, he catches a glimpse of your face in the midst of his tantrum. Sad like a puppy who got its tail stepped on and about ready to cry, he immediately seals his mouth in fear of making it worse. 

“Why are you doing that?” He spits. 

“Doing what?”

“Being all sad and pathetic. Does it really bother you that much if people know we’re dating?” 

“It’s not like that.” You assure. 

“Then what is it?” Rin prods, frustrated but not wanting to make things worse “Why is it such a big deal?” 

There’s a bout of silence before you sigh. 

“Rin, you’re a huge soccer player. The people you’re dating and stuff - it’s a big deal,” 

Rin cuts you off. 

“That’s what you were worried about? My career?” 

“Well, yeah.” 

“You’re stupid.” 

“Hey! I’m seriously worried about it and then you go and—” 

He gives you a frown. He forgets all too often you’re like this. He’s used to your silly and unserious way of talking, so it slips his mind that you’re actually a massively responsible person. You probably have a point about it, thinking of the consequences of your relationship through hell and back. With a detached sense of rationality - Rin can recognize that you’re probably thinking about more things than this. Otherwise it wouldn’t be so touchy of a subject. 

Nothing’s changed on paper, but everything will eventually. It’s something to think about, admittedly. 

Honestly Rin doesn’t care what strangers think. He’s blunt and unfriendly. Always has been, and will continue to be through the majority of his career he’s absolutely sure. Even outside of Bluelock, he has almost no regard for the opinions of other people and what concerns them. Maybe it’s irresponsible, but Rin isn’t playing soccer for the approval of the populace and nothing will ever change that. 

“If I thought that was something I should worry about, we wouldn’t be dating.” 

You look up at him. 

“You should be worried about it.” You emphasize. 

“I’m not. I don’t care what any of those people think.” 

“Then why’d you go and say something?” 

Rin seethes.

“They deserved it.” 

Your hand reaches for his cheek. He pauses and takes a deep breath, staring at you. He leans into your touch instinctively, frustration eased by the sensation. You stare back. 

“Okay. We’ll announce it officially later, then.” 

“Do we even need to do that? If you tell three people, half of our grade’ll find out anyway.” 

“Are you saying my friends  gossip?” 

He doesn’t reply to that. You pout at him and Rin fights the urge to kiss you. There’s a beat of silence as you give him a hug - the two of you on the same roof you always are. Rin doesn’t mind it, wrapping his arms loosely around your waist. 

“You know, it’s gonna get busy for me soon.” You mumble. So this is what else you were worrying about. “And for you. I have my entrance exam and the school is in Tokyo. And you’re gonna go back to Bluelock and—” 

“It’ll be fine.”

“I’m worried about it anyways.” 

“About what?” 

“I’ll see you less. What if you stop liking me randomly and I can’t even hunt you down about it?” 

Rin huffs “You’re insane enough to find me,” He drops his chin on your shoulder “Plus you talk to my mom.” 

“You’re gonna be so busy.” 

“I’ll come see you when I’m not.” 

“And you’re going to be surrounded by the human equivalent of siren women someday soon.” 

“I don’t care about that.” 

“But you might.” 

“I haven’t in eighteen years, you moron.” 

“I’m gonna miss you all the time.” You say, sniffly and Rin is so struck with a feeling of affection he almost falls “I already miss you all the time.” 

He squeezes you a little tighter “It’ll be fine.”

“For you.” 

Rin furrows his brow, pulling back to stare at you. 

“Not for me,” Because Rin can begrudgingly admit he will miss you worse than this “Just in general. It’ll be fine. You almost made it a year without me.” 

“But now I’m with you,” You reply easily, and softly and oh-so in love Rin wants to turn away “And I’m so happy and I want it be like this for a long time,”

“Just a long time? Not something stupid like a blossoming eternity?” 

“I thought I’d scare you.” 

“You did that in April.” He points out flatly. You hit him lightly but smile anyway. 

“It’s a problem how much I like you.” 

Rin likes you just as much. You’re probably too much of an idiot to realize and won’t for a long while. He takes a little comfort in, strangely.

“It’ll be fine. I’ll come see you.” He says again, because it’s the only thing he can think to say. He believes in it thoroughly. If Rin were a better, more candidly vulnerable person he thinks now he’d give the loving boyfriend speech. He almost wants to half-assedly try but can’t bring himself to get past the awkwardness. He hugs you tighter because it’s all he’s capable of, and hopes he can will it into you. The sincerity of his words, he wants so badly for them to reach you “Stop worrying so much.” 

“Rin-kun,” You start, then pause to look up at him. His breath hitches “Rin. I love you. Really.” 

He feels like he’s gonna be sick as he stares at you, eyes widened. You look the same as you always do. Unexpectant, terribly sincere, with your heart on your sleeve. The more Rin knows you, the more he thinks it can’t be easy to be so vulnerable all the time. 

So you do it for him, and only him. And Rin is always going to be intolerable. Frustrating and impatient. But he wants to do it for you too, where he can. Rin wants you to know it’ll be fine because the fact that you’re standing here now is nothing short of a miracle. Nothing comes out right. 

“Yeah.” He says, but he can’t get the rest of words out. And you laugh, and peek up at him through your lashes. 

“And you love me too, don’t you?” 

Rin grits his teeth. He wants to say no. 

“I guess.” 

“And we’re going to be just fine.” You repeat, hugging him tight. Rin hugs you back. He wants to say thank you. He wants to kiss you stupid and make fun of you at the same time. He wants you so much and so often he’s sure he’s lost his fucking mind. 

But he agrees with you, at least. He nods. He holds you. He doesn’t like to lie, so he looks at you instead. 

“Yeah. It’s gonna be fine.” 

__

EPILOGUE ; 

In Rin’s defense, he’s not trying to listen in on the conversions of your underclassmen. 

For starters, the club door is cracked up and Rin only has one airpod fully charged. Secondly, it’s not like they’re being quiet. Rin’s pretty sure anyone with decent enough hearing could hear them from down the hall. Given that it’s the newspaper club, he’s sure that the conversation isn’t usually this interesting. 

It’s just when he catches wind of your name while you’re nowhere to be found, he finds himself eavesdropping just a little. He leans back into the chair he’s sitting in, face tucked into his black mask and hat pulled neatly over his head. 

“Guys, I’ve decided I’m going to confess to Boss  no matter what.” 

He must mean you. Rin often hears how some of the people in the club affectionately add danchou to the end of your name. Rin scoffs a little at the kids' confidence. It reminds him a little of highschool. Rin really think you’re at more of a risk than he is. Being a celebrity makes him naturally unattainable - more of a fixture than a person. 

Everytime someone confesses to you though it’s sincere. From knowing you. And he gets it but it doesn’t keep him from scoffing and turning his nose up. 

“It’d be a good idea to give up while you’re ahead.” Says another unnamed voice. 

“Yeah Nakao-san. Do you even know who Senpai's boyfriend is?” 

“N-no. But it doesn’t matter. Through the powerful of love I’ll—”

Before Rin gets a chance to listen anymore, he hears your voice call out for him. He snaps his head up to look at you. You’re dressed so professionally it’s hard to recognize you like that. Your hair is cut neat and styled professionally and you’re dressed in business casual. He’s relieved he brought shoes for you to change into. 

You run up to him anyway, and Rin stands up to make sure you don’t stumble as you throw your arms around his neck. You’re closer in height with your heels on so he doesn’t have to bend down much at all to kiss you. He pulls down his mask quickly.

“Rin-tan, you’re here.” You say with a soft, breathless giggle “I missed youuu.” 

“Missed you too,” He says, an arm squeezed around your waist “I have shoes for you in the car,”

You gasp, rubbing your cheek against his affectionately. 

“You’re the best in the world. My feet are so sore.” 

“Did the interview go well?” Rin asks. You pull away, moving your hair away from your eyes before nodding. 

“Uh-huh. The women's rugby team captain is super chill and she interviews great so it went smoothly. I just need to drop the transcript off and then we can leave,” You say holding his hand. He squeezes your palms “Do you want to meet them? You don’t have to but a lot of them ask about you.” 

Normally Rin would say no. But he’s feeling a little petty today, after all. 

“Sure.” 

You beam, your hand in his as you nudge the door open. The room goes silent, a bout of excited cheering following at your return. He’s relieved to see you’re still so well loved, a little reluctant to let go of your hand. 

“Senpai, you’re back.” 

“Yup, yup. I have the transcript and recording on this USB. Watch it and draft the article up tonight. When I come in tomorrow, we’ll go through editing and get it out by Monday.” You say, hand on hip before remembering his presence. You grab him and Rin follows “Oh, and guys - this is my boyfriend! Rin Itoshi.” 

Most of them seem to know. Rin can sense the admiration but it’s respectful. He can tell that everyone is professionals in the field. Rin likes that. He bows politely. 

“Nice to meet everyone,” 

“Nice to meet you too, Itoshi-san.” 

“Danchou…you’re dating Rin Itoshi…the famous soccer player Rin Itoshi?” 

You giggle, looping your arm in Rin’s. He laughs internally. It’s the same kid who wanted to confess to you. 

“Uh-huh. We’re highschool sweethearts! And today is our very special date night so don’t contact me for any reason until tomorrow morning at least. I’ll see you guys later.” 

“Bye, senpai.” 

“Have fun on your date.” 

With that, you turn the corner and leave the room - immediately beginning to ramble about your day. Rin half-listens. He only pays complete attention when he hears your kouhais talking from down the hall. 

“Told you to give up, dude.” 

“Rin. Are you paying attention?” 

He chuckles to himself. 

“Yeah. Sorry.” 

❁ a/n ; hello!! me again. first of alll, if you read through this whole fic, thank you so much. second of all i want to discuss a few things about this fic.

im usually pretty keen on localization for my fics where possible because i think it makes for a smoother reader experience - however the usage of honorifics was important to the atmosphere for this one so i'll hope it wasn't too awkward to read.

secondly, im nervous about rins characterization for this one so i hope it was alright. apologies for any errors its 5am and im soo tired.

this fic was mostly meant as an exploration of how i think rin would really benefit from being with someone eccentric and bubbly. the core of their relationship is that reader is an overall emotionally intelligent and honest person and how that has a huge influence on rin so i hope that growth came thru. once again thanks for reading and i hope u enjoyed. rbs and tags always appreciated!

[gisele0127]

Could you do something where you ask Michael Kaiser, Rin + Sae Itoshi, and Reo Mikage if they only love you for your body? Thanks :)

notes: thank you for the request i love it :) not proofread though :(

Michael Kaiser

╰┈➤ “if anything you love me for my body”

you lay on his bed looking up at the ceiling after being intimate with michael. he comes back in the room holding two glasses of water humming to himself.

“here you go my lovely lady”

you pick up the glass of water, thankful for his kind actions. michael is a very loving partner, he always makes sure you feel loved and appreciated. even with all the assurance you can’t help but feel that maybe he’s just using you for your body. he’s always praising it, but maybe it was just something you weren’t used to.

“what you thinking about love?” he looks down at you lightly smiling. letting the intrusive thoughts win, “do you only love me because of my body?”. he chokes on his water and looks at you offended.

“excuse me? if anything i should be the one saying that. i mean look at me” you turn to face him, kind of annoyed he once again made this about himself. wrapping his arms around you and softly kissing your temple he says, “i’m just joking love. what would make you think that anyways?”

“i don’t know, you just always compliment my body so i just can’t help it” he smiles smugly, “oh i see what this is about. for the record i love everything about you, especially your caring nature. i guess my way of showing you love is complimenting you. and who do you think i am?! talking about im only using you for your body! i’m not a douche”

you see him pouting, he’s so dramatic. but in all honesty his words make you feel better, and you feel stupid for ever thinking that. of course he loves you for you. you’re the only person who could ever put up with him.

Rin itoshi

╰┈➤ “babe it’s 3 in the morning”

it’s currently 3:08 in the morning and you’re laying awake in bed next to your boyfriend. he’s sound asleep facing the other way, but you? you’ve just woken up from a nightmare where in which while you and rin were in a long distance relationship and he happened to have cheated on you, because “texting you was not enough”.

you stir him awake feeling a bit insecure. “rin, wake up” groaning he tiredly says, “babe it’s 3 in the morning what do you want?”

“do you only love me for my body?” “no” and he goes back to sleep a little annoyed that you woke him up for one of you silly questions.

“i can feel you staring at me y/n. what’s wrong?” “i don’t know” he groans annoyed, and drapes his arms around your torso.

“that’s such a stupid question. i don’t even care about what you look like. you could be as ugly as a troll and id still love you. now go to sleep i have to wake up early”

you softly smile at rin, sometimes he could be a little weird but you know what he means. but one things for sure, you feel better knowing that you boyfriend would still in fact love you if you were a troll.

Sae Itoshi

╰┈➤ “i cant name someone else with a better ass”

“do you only love me for my body?”

sae’s taken aback by such a random question while he’s sitting down watching replays of games.

“excuse me?” he looks at you with confusion.

“do. you. only. love. me. for. my. body?”

“well i can’t name someone else with a better ass” he says bluntly. sae has no filter and he says things as he sees. the man has a butt fetish after all. you look at him surprised that your boyfriend actually said that.

“what? i’m just being honest stop looking at me like that.” he says bluntly. you’re now laughing because you can in fact name other people with a better butt, but you quickly turn the conversation back to what you were saying before.

“i’m being serious sae”

“so am i”

“you only love me because of my ass?”

“yep”

“you’re an asshole you know that?”

he pulls you into a hug, something he rarely does and says, “i’m your asshole. and no that’s not the only thing i love about you” he flicks your forehead and gently kisses it. “it’s just a bonus”.

Mikage Reo

╰┈➤ “i have standards you know.”

“you really think that?!” he sounds surprised that you would even ask that question. “we’re literally doing face masks and watching keeping up with the kardashians and you’re asking me if i love you only because of your body?”

he’s so dramatic. “i have standards you know. i’m not some low life.” you look at him seriously, a little hurt to be quite honest. he notices the glossyness in your eyes and is quick to give you a soft look.

“i don’t just fall for anyone you know. you’re special, and you know that. so don’t come asking me silly questions” he ruffles your hair.

you feel better at his reassurance, and when you think deeper in thought you scold yourself. reo could’ve chosen anyone in the world and he chose you. he’s lucky to have you.

in the morning you wake up to an extravagant breakfast made by yours truly (surprisingly), and now you’re thinking about how lucky you got.

[emmyrosee]

heres a list of characters from all of my current fandoms who deserve and need to be annoyed (affectionately) bc thats like. my whole love language

1.) sakusa kiyoomi from haikyuu. dont even look at me. read almost any of my sakusa kiyoomi pieces and TELL ME he doesn't need to be bothered. bc he does. you have to be clawing him from the outside in, you need to eat his drywall, need to pick his nose, ANYTHING to bother him, do it, bc his life is too boring when you dont

2.) shinsou hitoshi from my hero academia. omg. please pester him. shinsou finds so much amusement to the lengths you go to to bother him, because you don't do it so intense; like sure, you could rip the manga out of his hand as a means to cuddle with him. but instead, you merely worm under the arms holding his manga, and you're content to cuddle like that for hours, and he is too

3.) the feminine urge to put sukuna- hot take but choso??? needs to have a nuisance by his side. because he is so deep in his head all the time that he needs the lightheartedness of your teasing and affection keeps him grounded. like sure, he could spiral out of control because of his anxieties… or he can let you bite his arm after you “salt it” because he’s “so yummy.”

4.) omg basically anyone in tokyo revengers, just please annoy him. make him so emotionally confused in your presence. like sure, he’d love to be annoyed at the fact that you’ve texted him twice about having to poop, telling him you’ve had no water, you miss him and you want to gnaw on his bones, but he’s not going to be because how could he be? no one could prepare him for the way you talk to him, and now he gets to see what… creative ways you can show him affection. sometimes, he smirks at his phone when you text him, and when he’s asked what he’s smirking about, he shakes his head and sighs, “my troublemaker just took a dump. they wanted me to tell everyone.”

5.) easy, rayne ames HASSSSSSSSS to have an annoying insignificant other. he’s got this whole ‘mysterious’ aura around him that you need to absolutely obliterate. he’s not cool, he’s a nerd who likes it when you gently run your nails over his back and hair, and you have no problem calling him out over it, much to his delight dismay. you love telling people about the stuffed rabbit he keeps on his bed and cuddles with at night when he’s mad at you, just as much as he loves grabbing your hand and dragging you away in embarrassment. he’s not fooling anyone, or escaping the “he actually loves this” allegations by keeping you around.

6.) ITOSHI RIN NEEDS TO BE BOTHERED YO. I DONT MAKE THE RULES. the mental image of poking your head over the side of the bed and flashing him the biggest set of puppy eyes to ask for a sweet treat at ungodly hours is all that’s in my brain. when he slides into bed next to you, and AS SOON AS he gets comfy, you ask him for a glass of water??? BRO HE HAAAAAATES YOU (literally loves you so much he gets it for you)

6.5) also chigiri??? i want to bother him so bad. i want to be his menace. i know for a fact he loves to pretend to hate you when you’ve just spent the past three minutes trying to squeeze a blackhead from his nose, his groans of agony ringing through the house so loud, you’re surprised the neighbors don’t hear. you both know damn well he could fling you off and across the room. but he doesn’t. again, he’s REALLY not escaping the “he actually loves this” allegations by keeping you close. 10/10 would annoy him again 🩷

——-

@reverie-starlight it truly takes one person to say yes and im frothing at the chompers SJDJDENSJ

[inluvzmoon]

⋆｡˚. his girl - itoshi rin

• sfw

• notes: the newest jjk leaks left me devastated so i needed to write about rin being sweet on his girl to cope with it ╥﹏╥ | not proofread!! very rushed!!

"what the hell are you doing..?" rin stood in the doorway of his bedroom, his eyebrow raised while looking at you as you sat on he bed, facing the wall.

you barely heard rin as he spoke, more focused on the way you were setting up your plushies on his bed. "give me a second, rinnie.."

with an annoyed huff, rin slowly made his way towards you, finally noticing the line of plushies on his bed, right next to where his head laid on his pillow. "what the hell are you doing?"

finally, you turned to face him after placing the third hello kitty plush right next to his pillow. your face held contentment as you looked at rin, ready to explain yourself. "your room looks so plain without them. if anything, im seriously doing you a favor"

for a few more seconds, rin just stares at the stuffed animal. his eyes settled on the small panda toy that sat against another hello kitty plush you had. it stared back at him in a way that bothered him, making him snort in disgust. "i don't even have any words to describe how against this i am"

rin now had his arms crossed as he stared down at you, judgment clear on his face with an eyebrow quirked up in slight confusion or amusement. you couldn't really tell. you stared up at him, your head slightly tilted to the side with a look of confusion.

it was beginning to grow hard for rin to keep up his annoyed expression as you looked at him. he found you adorable with your clueless look, but he didn't want you to know that.

instead, rin scoffed and turned away from you, his cheeks slightly growing red. "just keep them off the bed when im going to sleep," rin muttered, looking towards the window. "that panda fucker looks weird"

you laughed softly, picking up the panda stuffed animal before bringing it towards rin. "but he's so cute.." you spoke with a small pout. "he's just a little guy" the panda was then shoved into his face and rin couldn't resist rolling his eyes as he grew annoyed with your antics involving your plushies.

rin glared at the panda for a second before taking the small toy from your hands. despite your loud whining, rin held it above his head while glarind down at you.

"i said i didn't like it, didn't i?"

the loud whines grew even louder as rin spoke. you obviously weren't gonna listen to him. "didn't i say that"

"rin.." you huffed with a mean glare. "give him back"

still looking down at you, rin sighed. "will you shove it in my face again..?" he asked hesitantly, finding that your 'mean' expression was cute instead of intimidating.

you quickly shook your head no and held your hands up for rin to place the panda in your hold. with one last surge of hesitancy, rin finally caved and dropped the panda in your hands. and rin wanted to roll his eyes and glare at you in annoyance but he just smiled fondly at you, tolerating it when you shoved the panda in his face again despite him just telling you not to.

he could never resist his favorite girl after all.

[kaiijo]

BLUE LOCK PLAYERS AS DEMIGODS (i) — [BLUE LOCK]

characters: shidou ryusei, oliver aiku, itoshi sae content: gn! reader (reader is called “sunshine” once in shidou’s) slightly suggestive humor, set at camp half-blood (or some random camp for demigods lol) but you don’t need to have read percy jackson to read this notes: references this post

⋆｡° child of ares! shidou x child of apollo! you

it’s unsurprising to all of your siblings that shidou ryusei is in and out of the infirmary a lot because he gets into A LOT of fights (“typical ares kid” your siblings say while rolling their eyes)

the first time he came to the infirmary, you were the only one brave enough to patch him up given that, not only is shidou known for picking random fights but also for being kind of batshit crazy. after that, you were the only one he even let touch him without lowkey growling at them…

“shidou’s here again,” otoya, one of your half-brothers, informed you one day. you sighed heavily and found shidou in the waiting room, beckoning him back to an exam room

“take your shirt off,” you told him and he grinned some wild smile at you and said, “ooh, already trying to get me naked? at least take me to dinner, sunshine”

you snorted and when he did, your eyes widened at the giant, purpling bruise forming on his side. “what happened this time? “underlashes junior got really into sparring”

ah, that made sense - this wasn’t the first time shidou got into a physical altercation with itoshi rin 

“leave the kid alone,” you said as you grabbed an ice pack from the freezer and threw it at him

he caught it and asked, “not gonna hold it against me yourself?” “why would i do that” “well you were so eager to get my shirt off” “you’re insufferable”

shidou licked his teeth, still looking at you with that shit-eating grin. “yeah but you like that”

what was the most annoying this about that statement: you couldn’t exactly say it’s a total lie

⋆｡° child of poseidon! oliver aiku x child of athena! you

oliver aiku had a bit of a reputation as a womanizer and, to be fair, it’s not undeserved. he was charming and hot, it’s not like it’s just random, and he probably flirted with nearly every person within a ten mile radius of camp

he first noticed you at a game of capture the flag. not to brag or anything, but oliver was known as the best defender at camp but somehow, the opposing team managed to outmaneuver him and his team and steal the flag and carry it to their side

shocked and impressed, oliver inquired as to who was the mastermind behind this strategy and the answer was simple: you, a child of athena 

he found you in the armory, hanging your sword back up and, leaning against the doorway, he said, “hey”

you glanced over your shoulder. “hey?” 

“so you’re the master strategist?” “yeah” “i don’t think we’ve met, im oliver.” “yeah i know” and with that, you resumed taking off the rest of your armor

well, that was new

“you know,” oliver said, strolling over to stand beside you as he took off his own armor, “i’d love to get to know you better. not every day someone manages to pull one over on me. wanna grab some lunch”

you gave him a side eye and said, “sorry, i’ve got something else to do” and then you brushed past him and out of the armory

oliver watched your retreating form and it was from that day on that he decided his just had to make you his 

(spoiler: he eventually succeeds after many, many, many times asking you out (read: groveling, begging on his knees, etc.))

⋆｡° child of zeus! itoshi sae x child of hermes! you

you get sent on a quest with itoshi sae and you were forewarned by multiple different people that you should brace yourself for a quick but absolutely miserable experience

“sae’s super powerful but gods, his attitude is absolute shit”

honestly, all the things people told you should have worried you more but you ignored them. it wasn’t fair to listen to hearsay about someone in your opinion and besides, it just made you want to step up to the challenge and befriend him even more

as the two of you set off, you asked him a bajillion questions about him, his life outside of camp, his life at camp, his brother rin (which earned you the most acidic glare and the meanest answer ever), and whatever else you could think of

“do you ever stop talking?”

“not really” sae gave you another withering look

you ran into tons of monsters and it was honestly incredible to witness the full power of a child of a big three god - sae’s battle prowess coupled with his control over lightning had you feeling just a little unnecessary but you also assisted well (sae wouldn’t admit it but he was pretty surprised by your quick thinking and reflexes and your skill with your weapon)

finding that you weren’t completely useless was when sae began not being so short with you and actually made some effort at conversation and you two lowkey started bonding over the next few days

one might even say sae began to develop some semblance of fondness 

you had a major breakthrough with him when you essentially sacrificed yourself and threw yourself in front of whatever mythical beast you were sent to defeat

sae never disposed of an enemy quicker than he had in that moment and he got you two back to camp even faster

you’re passed out for three days in the infirmary and when you woke up, sae’s asleep in the chair besides your bed

“oh good, you’re awake!” one of the apollo kids who works at the infirmary entered the room. “how are you feeling?”

“a little sore” you glanced over at sae and the apollo kid said, “not sure how you managed it but sae’s refused to leave the infirmary since he brought you back. must make you pretty special.”

[ada7201]

bllk boys …

with a clutz s/o! < hcs >

gn! reader

★ part 1 with, Kaiser, Barou, Kunigami, Chigiri

★ part 2 with, Isagi, Bachira, Nagi, Reo

★ part 3 with, Rin, Sae, Shido, Aiku

hope you like it ꨄ don’t forget to suggest something if you have any ideas for me! :p

Itoshi Rin

at first, he thought you were just another lukewarm idiot - but clumsier.

until he got to know you ('ω')

he doesn’t hate your clumsiness, but he doesn’t love it.

he helps you up almost every time you fall, unless you’ve annoyed him

SOMETIMES thinks it’s cute. (always)

washes your clothes if you spill something on yourself

“i’m sorry, Rin!” you’d sob, shaky hands reaching out to pull his sweater off of yourself. he was so kind, and let you wear it - but you spilled coffee all over it!

“it’s alright. are you hurt?” he asked, helping you pull the sweater off. he reached out and pressed a gentle hand to your stomach, feeling your skin warmer that usual - you must’ve burned yourself slightly from the coffee.

the sweater was not his concern anymore, he simply threw it in the hamper and cupped your cheeks.

“you don’t have to be sorry.” he’d say - before hesitating. he was never good with words, so he found it hard to comfort you. “it’s just a sweater, i can get a new one.” he adds, brushing away some hair from your eyes.

you sniffle and nod, looking up at your boyfriend’s loving gaze. “but, it was your favorite-“ you’d start, only for him to cut you off with a gentle kiss.

it did not matter if that sweater was his favorite, he never wants to see you cry over a stupid thing like that again.

whenever he gets you gifts, he asks the person at the register if it’s easy to break

he makes sure to take you places that aren’t that easy to break anything, or fall if you get what i mean.

like, he takes you to places such as movies, (and makes sure you put your drink in his cup holder.) gardens, (where he can hold your hand) but if you want to go anywhere - he’ll take you.

he’s super gentle with you, like he treats you as if you were a glass doll

thinks of you as a flower.

like, he once took you to a botanic garden and said “that flower reminds me of you.” (he got flustered for the next hour after that)

Itoshi Sae

when he first met you, he decided it was best to avoid you because he didn’t want you to fall on him.

that was until you actually did, though

Sae was talking to his manager about something, probably about the whole blue lock thing - when you came crashing into him! he stumbled backwards, with you landing right onto him.

“sorry!” you gasp, quickly getting off of the burgundy haired male, who was laying on the floor with wide eyes. he sat up slowly, groaning softly as he looked up at who it was - and like he guessed, it was you. you were a another soccer player who he had met a few times… one of Oliver’s many exes, probably. “are you okay?” you’d ask, holding a hand out for him to take.

he nodded, taking your hand and standing up. his sharp eyes stared down at you, watching the way you slightly shivered at his gaze. “im fine.” he responds lowly, before continuing the conversation with his manager.

you escaped soon after, getting to the meeting room where you started your interview.

Sae didn’t expect to run into you so much after that, and he certainly didn’t expect to come to enjoy your company - as clumsy as you may be.

he usually buys you things in pairs so if you break one, there’s another that’s newer!

carries all of your bags for you, because he wants to, and because he doesn’t want you to drop them

keeps an eye on you to make sure you won’t trip up. (also because he thinks you’re pretty)

he fights the urge to chuckle SO hard whenever you fall or trip

he either catches you before you fall or helps you up. he will never ever let you stay on the floor. not even if he’s mad at you

if there are a lot of people around the two of you, such as paparazzi or something, he usually keeps an arm around you or holds your hand so you don’t fall in front of them.

if people make fun of you, in person or online, he gets really pissed off

how dare they make fun of his clumsy little lover? only he can do that!

he either threatens them or gets his manager to handle it for him

Shido Ryusei

he finds it adorable!

takes advantage of it all the time, and sometimes says things like “i’ll help you… if you suck my-“

he still helps you up after

when he first met you he thought you were faking it

he piggybacks you and carries you sometimes to make sure you don’t fall (cute!!)

if he feels bad that you fell, he falls down with you to make himself feel included

he likes to call himself you “guardian” even though half the time he’s the one tripping you up and causing you to break things…

he tries to fix the things that you break if he ever sees you sad about it, but he ends up breaking it even more

he sulks if you say it’s bad

sometimes makes you like stand on his feet (?)

for example, he puts your feet onto his and wraps his arms around your waist: kind of making you walk like a puppet?

“come ooon! it’ll be fun〜” he pleads, a grin on his face as his hands reach out to hold onto you. “i won’t hurt ya!” he adds - but the evil glint in his eye tells you otherwise. you simply sigh, and decide to agree with his demands.

“fine…” you huff, letting Shido’s hands wrap around your waist - squeezing the flesh slightly and giggling when you yelp.

“alright, alright!” he giggles, placing you in front of him; your feet on top of his. “now you’ll know what’s like to walk normally.” he winks, wiggling his eyebrows as he starts to walk with you like that.

“hey, hey!” you panic, suddenly not trusting your boyfriend at all. “are you sure this is safe?!”

“i’m very sure!” he responds, before laughing loudly. you’re so cute, getting all scared like that!

he continued to play around with you, like a puppet, until he lost his footing - sending the both of you crashing onto the floor.

he giggled, watching your jaw drop and your pretty eyes widen. you’re so cute, he thinks.

he blamed the fall on you afterwards

he once compared you to Humpty Dumpty because you were sitting on a walks fence and fell off.

Oliver Aiku

he loves your clumsiness too!

thinks your super silly

he helps you up when he feels like it, but finds it cute when you’ve fallen

catches you sometimes…

he usually keeps you close to him so he can make sure you won’t fall or break anything that easily

he buys you shoes without laces so it’s a bit easier to walk around

whenever he takes you shopping, he suggests you wear clothes that are a little short / less loose so it’s easier to move around. but either way, he’s okay with what you wear

he literally always holds your hand or arm

always wants to be around you. “because he wants to make sure you’re not doing anything stupid.”

“where’s y/n?” Aiku would ask his teammate, looking around for his cute lover. “i haven’t seen them since the match finished!” he’d cry.

“dude, you saw them 15 minutes ago… they went to pick up your bag.” Sae would sigh, rubbing his forehead in annoyance.

“oh!” Oliver smiled cheerfully. “how sweet of them!” he’d giggle, cheeks growing redder at the thought of you.

“wait.” Aiku paused, his face flushing pale. “you let them go get my bag?! what if they fall!” he panics, rushing out the door in search of you - only to be greeted with your pretty face, a bruise on your nose.

“my baby!” he cooed, pulling you into a hug.

“he’s so whipped.” Sendo would whisper to Sae, who nodded as they both watched Aiku gush over you.

[yaostars]

HOW THEY ARE AS A FATHER

note: she/her prns, fem reader, tw: sh*dou a/n: idk how i came up with this.. summary: how they are as a father (poorly written)

kaiser

as much as annoying as he is once u pop that watermelon out he dead n gone

when he saw his child for the first time he bursted out in tears before blaming it on the hospitals lighting

since you both had a baby girl kaiser was cautious around everything that came across them

kaiser always wanted a baby boy so he could get his soccer skills even though he loves his daughter with his life but he finally felt like it was settled and no more kids (he wanted more kids)

yeah right he jinxed it you got pregnant again

you had a baby boy and once watermelon two came out kaiser couldnt help it but cried and admitted it

happy family

his daughter had gotten into ballet whilst his son got into soccer

he was the dad that rocked up for anything

kaiser secretly still wants another kid possibly soon once both kids at least get into first grade AND HE OPENLY ADMITTED IT TO HIS KIDS

rin

due to his cold personality this man can be a softie at times and that is when he is with you 24/7 or the fact you just pushed out his first ever kid

he cried a bit we know he isnt slick at it

after a few days being in hospital you could finally bring your little one home

when you got back to work and came home late you found rin next to the crib holding onto his childs hand

rin likes to show off at sae because he became a father first

after having a baby boy he got into soccer big time

he loves his family (but he wants to make more kids so he put a 6 month reminder)

yep u got pregnant at least a year later after having your first child

your having twins!!! when rin found out he was stuck in a daze

two girls meant twice as hard as pushing out the first child in the family

rin wanted to make sure his children had a happy healthy sibling relationship unlike saes and his

his daughters got into swimming and the other got into soccer as well

sporty family

sae

when sae found out you were pregnant he honestly thought you were joking around

pushing out a baby was hard enough but sae couldnt deal with only getting 3 hours of sleep a week

sae told rin about how he is a father but rin dgaf

sae was only wanting a small family nothing big like his brothers but it was nice just having a kid

the gods granted him a soccer girl and he became a soccer dad

he was thinking about having another kid with you but he didnt want to pressure you after telling him you never want to go through labour again

overall even though his family was small and a bit sporty he loved them heaps at the end of the day

shidou

this man is literally a dog on stuff being a little horny too much

when he found out you were pregnant he was over the moon and posting it on every single acc and every person he knows

shidou is defo a mummas boy so he told her everything

he wants a big family like a whole class he says

he marks the calendar when to love make again so you could have another kid right after you told him you were pregnant

the first child that was pushed out was a baby boy and shidou cried a bit but blamed it he has allergies

his first child was a maniac and had every single bit of shidous personality but looked like you

at least a few months after birthing your first child you were pregnant again and it was on purpose because of him

you had a baby boy again!!

shidou was wanting a baby girl so badly and even said he will try until he gets a baby girl in his family

for the third time you got pregnant and no it wasnt a baby girl

the second and third baby had your personality but mixed looks

FOR THE FOURTH TIME. you had finally gotten...

A BABY BOY!!! im joking a baby girl

and yes he cried but he was so happy so he could become a soccer dad

[venusbby]

HI VALLLL HOPE UR DOING WELL!! can u do 31 with rin pls :3

🍁 character & prompt: ITOSHI RIN // #31. "your hair is so messy." "oh please, it's because you can't stop touching it."

note: im doing great ai, thanks for asking and i hope you're doing good too! i hope u like this <333 have a nice day/night :) # drabble game prompts here

summary: who knew rin was such a heavy sleeper that he didn't realise how he was partially responsible for his unusually messy hair.

"what. you've been staring at me for so long. is there something on my face?"

you jumped once rin said that. you didn't think he'd notice— but you should've known better.

"it's... it's nothing."

"just tell me. what is it?" rin grumbled, running a hand over his face and through his hair consciously, voice hoarse because of the long nap he had just woke up from. currently, he sat near the kitchen counter while you prepared some tea, your eyes tearing up as you yawned. it was so warm outside that once you and rin got into bed after lunch, with your arms and legs spread across each other's, you guys immediately fell asleep.

or at least, he did. while you just stared at him and gave him gentle head pats until you fell asleep with your hand still buried in his hair. it was uncontrollable. he couldn't just sleep so peacefully, snoring quietly and unconsciously clutching onto your shirt without you running your fingers through his hair. and although he would be annoyed once he found out, you knew something that he didn't.

and that something was; your lovely, sleepy boyfriend had groaned in protest when you stopped messing with his hair, mumbling something muffled, along the lines of 'don't stop.' (actually, you heard it absolutely crystal clear.)

and who were you to not go on after that? ♡

you pursed your lips to refrain from smiling as you poured the tea into two cups. softly padding over to him, you sat on the stool right beside his. your tea was scorching hot. you set the cup down on the counter in front of you and tried your best to avoid eye contact.

a few minutes passed by while rin looked at you skeptically, his fingers still twisting and turning his hair as he tried to figure out what was wrong. it wasn't like he woke up and the first thing he did was stare at himself in the mirror.

it didn't take him long to realise it. but he kept quiet about it, trying to get it out of you.

"i look like an idiot right now, don't i?" he mumbled, carefully picking up the cup to take a sip, blowing on the hot liquid first.

you snorted.

"your hair is so messy." you tried to act as if you weren't the reason why— talking as if you just observed him. "you sleep like a bear."

he couldn't believe that you were trying to blame it on him. rin was not going to lose so easily.

"oh, please," rin huffed finally, glaring at you as he took another sip, the cup covering half of his face, leaving only those icy eyes to bore into yours. "it's because you can't stop touching it."

you stiffened, "what? no."

"such a liar. you know what you did, babe."

"i didn't do anything!"

he nodded. "mhm, i'll get you back one day."

you couldn't stop smiling now. if the secret was out (at least a part of it), then nothing mattered anymore. your hand slowly reached out to touch his hair, only to be smacked away quickly.

"baby, come on." you dragged out, shifting your stool closer to his, grabbing his arm. "i cant help it, your hair is just—"

"so you ruined it?"

"i did not ruin it. you look just as adorable as you were before you slept. maybe even more..."

"no hair touching privileges for a day."

"okay, now that is ridiculous."

"don't care. suffer."

"rin!"

🍄 taglist: @yoimyas @hyomagiri @beanxiv <3 lmk if u want to be added.

[nrc-asteryn-crew]

Mace continued to watch with his full attention as Casimir did his stuff, though not really finding himself able to think of anything to say in the moment.

He found Casimir's library of compositions very fascinating to look at, it was sorta like a miniscule peek into the sort of person Casimir was beneath all of his flamboyance. How interesting.

"Kyehehe, comin' up with ideas already are we?"

He commented, leaning in a little closer as a show of interest, and also to get a better look. His long distance sight has always been a bit annoying like that. He perked up when he saw Casimir begin to look through all of the different voicebanks. Something he could share his input on! Hell yeah!

He inwardly giggled a little at Casimir's show of 'evil laughter'. Sevens, he didn't think he'd ever get bored when this guy was around.

"Entertainin' fo'sure! Vocaloid tunin's a bit of a hassle ta learn at the beginnin', but I think you'll be able ta learn pretty fast! Ya seem like the type-! Ya could go with a classic Hatsune Miku, or look inta some of the different VOCALOIDs! Your choice, really-! Some of my faves are definitely GUMI, Flower, and Oliver!"

He chirped, sharing his opinion animatedly, the little movements of his free arm accompanying his words, the other holding onto the back of Casimir's seat, balancing him upright while he leaned back just a little, so as not to block Casmir's view of the screen.

- Mace (🔌)

For the second afternoon in a row that week, Mace found himself walking down the same corridor of the Diasomnia dorms. He would have come by sooner, having finished downloading all of the stuff onto the drive way earlier, but he got a bit distracted doing... a few different things. He hoped Casimir didn't mind the wait too much. It would be a shame if he did.

Approaching Casimir's door, he knocked the same way he did last time, before stepping back.

"Yello~! Guess who it is~!"

He called out, combing his fingers through his hair to neaten it up a bit while he waited for the door to open. Not that he was trying to make it look extra neat. But more... trying to make it seem like he didn't just crawl out of bed a few hours ago, just to only make it in time to attend the last class of the day. Because he definitely didn't. Definitely.

- Mace (🔌) [ @nrc-asteryn-crew ]

( ooc// i cannot the way he starts monologuing in his thoughts then gets more sentimental STOPP I CANT DO THIS I LOVE HIM SM ACTUALLY if he was in game i WOULD whale /pos silly guy if anything ur inability to control ur UM is just making mace more interested in you (i actually love that it does that tho its so silly) anyway I FINALLY MADE THE GOSH DARN BLOG . well sorta i more so just had to revamp the pinned post that was already there but YEA!!! :D )

*the knocking on the door startled Casimir from his thoughts that, today, mainly consisted of some nonsense on a homework page. He relaxed though, at the recognition of the knocking pattern and voice and stood up*

*He took a deep breath to compose himself and adopt his typical, grandiose persona before opening the door*

Greetings to you, Vassal Mace! It is a pleasure to see that you have decided to return to my lair on this day.

I assume that your being here means you have successfully completed your quest?

*Casimir did his best to contain his excitement, tapping his fingers together in what, to most appearances, could be read as excitement or a gesture of evil plotting - the perfect gesture for one of his status, now that he thought about it.*

(✨HELL YEAH! banger that u have a blog now! I think I'm already following ur acct from my main but yaur!!! Also thank u SM that means. A lot actually bc I'm just here like "yeah this silly guy who exists in my brain is gonna get thrown from a window" and I really appreciate when other ppl like my silly guys dhhdsjdj. I'm so excited to be able to learn more Abt ur guys now tho too whehehehe >:3¢. Probably should've done this from the tags. Anyways.)

[kysuguru]

you REPLIED IM SO HAPPY😭😭🤞 btw the fact that suguru AND satoru are both her love interests im so HAPPY stsg for the WIN!!! i love how suguru and shoko automatically know what satoru is implying cause hes so so OBVIOUS!

i cant imagine the troubles suguru and satoru would have with reader.. shes so enduring and she allows them to do whatever because shes too sweet! ofc shes serious when the time comes down to it but i just know she takes the two lightly and cares too highly of their opinions to really say no to them. i 100% know suguru is worst when it comes to teasing her. in this universe i want to believe suguru does not deflect so he stays there w them. although reader probably does not realize the two actually is in love with her, she probably assumes they are with each other so she does not want to intrude.

what if shoko and reader were discussing about first dates and she finds out reader never had her first anything and sets her up with one? maybe rin or shin?! LOL and behold satoru and suguru being menaces and completely mean to her . the trouble they would cause to the way they would be so upset. reader actually enjoyed her first date but shes confused why stsg are so upset over her. they always teased her for not having a bf and when she does try theyre even more ruthless?? bc in reality to stsg they always thought she belonged to them and they’re actually in shock that shoko would do that knowing about their crushes on reader? (cue shoko laughing in the background)

i love these asks smmm😭 tysm for sending. and ur right!! i have chapter one and two written and posted on my ao3, but suguru doesn’t defect, i cant allow that. and yes… stsg are sooo annoying when it comes to jealousy. like they are so suffocating..

this is new, very new.

it was a brief conversation, so mundane you wouldn’t bother to remember it unless brought up. shoko asked a simple question. “you ever been on a date before?” after talking about her horrible experiences with lousy men. it was an easy answer, “no.”

and you thought it’d end there. of course it’s normal for girls your age to go on dates with other people, experience the life of romance at a young age, but it wasn’t odd to meet a girl your age who hadn’t been on a date. so you weren’t sure why shoko put you up to this.

rin sits across you with a beaming smile, the fluorescents of the cafe highlighting his freckles. you fiddle with the warm cup of coffee in front of you. you weren’t much of a coffee person, but you panicked and ordered the first thing on the menu. it was bitter, terribly so, you weren’t sure whether you’d prefer this or satoru’s cups of diabetes.

you sip on it occasionally, to make yourself look engaged. you hope your poker face has improved, you’d be humiliated if the bitterness on your tongue manifested itself onto your expression (rin noticed, but felt too awkward to speak up).

it’s weird, and you try pretending this wasn’t set up at a romantic date.

you like rin, he’s really nice, but you’d never even imagined him romantically.

he’s beaming at you, you think he’s blushing, and he looks as if he’s in a daze with his cheek resting on his palm. the look of adoration is so shell shocking you’re gazing around the cafe at other customers he might be looking at.

you chalk it up to excitement of being in such a nice place.

conversation with him is easy though, you realize.

it’s unlike satoru or suguru. suguru’s a listener, unlike satoru who’s a talker. they fit in so well with one another it makes it hard to fit in. you don’t mind that, watching from afar is enough for you. but you still yearn.

maybe that’s why shoko did this in the first place. to get your mind off of them. you suppose it wouldn’t be bad to broaden your spectrum, you needed more friends anyway. you couldn’t always hang onto shoko, suguru, and satoru forever.

hours pass, and before either of you know it, the sun sets.

rin was full of stories, he had so much to tell about kyoto, his classmates, and his missions. he was so fond of it all that you couldn’t bear to stop him. it was nice listening to someone on the same level as you. not that you disliked listening to satoru boast about his missions and how awesomely strong he was, but it was a nice change of pace to hear such things come from someone of your caliber.

you could get used to this.

your entering the school with a content face. you feel them both before you see them.

satoru drapes himself onto you, talking obnoxiously loud in your ear as suguru sends you a soft smile. your company with rin was wonderful, but you didn’t realize how much you missed your favorite people until you see their visages.

“where were you at for so long?” suguru asks calmly, though there’s a hint of something else you can’t really decipher. maybe suspicion.

“shoko set me up on a date with rin.” you say sheepishly, scratching your cheek.

they both freeze, you can feel the way satoru’s breath stutters as his hold gets loose. you look up at them both, brows raised.

…

it’s so silent. was it something you said? were they perhaps upset you didn’t say anything? did they want to tag along? you would’ve said yes immediately.

“rin from kyoto?” satoru whispers, and you think he sounds angry. you can’t fathom why, so you try and brush if off. even though there’s a seed of dread starting to grow in the pit of your stomach.

“yes... shoko said something about chemistry. whatever that means!” you chuckle nervously.

satoru let’s you go, backing away. now you’re worried.

“i-is something wrong?” you look up at suguru for assistance but he’s turned his head.

you shuffle your feet, anxious. they’re obviously upset, but you don’t know why. “did i do something?” that’s the only thing you could think of. or did they not like rin? he was a nice guy, so you wouldn’t understand why.

satoru rubs your head, startling you.

“it’s nothing, sweets,” he says.

but he’s walking off before you can speak any further, he makes a point not to let you see his face as he departs. suguru gives you a strained smile before he’s following. “night,” he mutters.

and even though satoru reassured you, that seed of dread continued to grow.

satoru and suguru are busy. satoru hasn’t asked for your notes in awhile. you wanna assume that he’s got it down until you hear him loudly bugging suguru for his notebook. your heart drops at the fact that satoru just hasn’t asked you. you don’t know why that hurts, it shouldn’t. maybe suguru just conveys the answer better, there’s nothing wrong with that.

they go out for lunch, leaving you and shoko in the empty cafeteria with your cold noodles. shoko’s great company, of course, but the lack of satoru’s loud voice and suguru’s scolding makes it feel eerily quiet.

nights in the common room have shrunk to just you and shoko. it’s been like this for a few days. only a few days. yet you feel as if these days are dragging on slower than usual. shoko notices, and rolls her eyes, muttering under her breath how pathetic boys could be.

you think she’s spoken to them, for they look at you a little more now. but they barely talk to you unless the situation calls for it, even then, they’re awkward.

but it isn’t until shoko has been in high demand after a dangerous mission that the first years came back from that you’re alone with them. you’re nervous, feeling their eyes trained on you. you don’t dare make contact.

they begin talking to each other, and you feel joy consume you at the familiarity of it. you’re looking up now, making eye contact with the both of them. satoru opens his mouth, but you intervene.

“i’m sorry!”

their eyes are wide.

“i’m sorry for whatever i did. it’s just.. you guys feel distant. if it’s because of me then—”

“i should say sorry,” your eyes flit up to suguru’s as he scratches his neck sheepishly. “i was being childish.” he speaks into his palm. “we were being childish.” he corrects himself, eyes glaring into satoru’s, who huffs and crosses his arms.

“so it was something i did?” your brows knit as a frown etched itself onto your lips.

“it’s more complicated than that,” suguru says. but you’re not convinced.

satoru mutters something under his breath, you catch nothing but rin’s name. so you ask him to repeat himself.

“i just don’t like rin, is all.”

you blink.

“d-did he do something?” you needed to know, if he hurt or insulted suguru or satoru in any way you were ready to break it off—

“no. not exactly, we just… don’t like you being alone with him,” suguru admits, flushed.

oh!

you felt relief fill your chest.

“i think i know now.” you smile, happily. they stare. they both lean slightly forward, anticipating. “if i ever go out with him again i’ll invite you both out!” you clap your hands together.

they were upset that they weren’t invited along. that makes sense. you’re relieved. satoru did eye that cafe whenever you three passed it.

they share a look, one of amusement and one of exasperation.

“such a ditz,” satoru grumbles.

“we’d like that,” suguru smiles.

you’re happy, so happy you could cry tears of relief.

“i’m glad, i thought you were both gonna hate me forever.”

suguru grabs your hand, caressing your palm, your heartbeat spikes. “that’d never happen.”

satoru scoots closer to you and drapes himself over your shoulders, the familiar action has your cheeks hurting from how big you’re smiling. he squishes his cheek against yours, rubbing softly as he speaks, “never go out alone with rin again, okay? you need at least me or suguru there, not even shoko’s enough!”

they will never forget how she betrayed them so.

“of course,” you exhale, joyful.

and yes, abt stsg ur also right! this is kinda a poly thing. stsg love each other and the reader

[itonashi]

i love your lilbro!nagi fics sm!!♡ and the nagi's older sis!reader having a enemies to lovers with itoshi sae would be just🤗🤭😋😙😚☺️☺️ it makes me twirl my hair and giggle like a highschool girl in love so🤐🤐🤐🤐 maybe a small fic, if it is not a bother? have good day feel free to ignore xx

YOU'RE THE WORST.

pairing: itoshi sae x fem!reader

warning: manga spoilers, cussing, reader is nagi's older sister ( i love you guys for doing these hehe ), reader is also a pro athlete. timeline where the blue lock project already ended (multiple timeline also), 3 years older than sae. mentioned other chars. english is not my first language...

note: idk what the hell is this plot. idk much about sports (im srs, im not a sport person. i throw balls that didn't even reach the person im targeting) i love sae he's sec fave to me (chigiri is on top), i personally don't see nagi having a relationship with someone. i liked the idea of him having a siblings and you guys really loved my older sister nagi reader 🤭 (i like it too). happy 200 followers!!!

your first meet with itoshi sae was when he went to picked a striker for the u-20 vs blue lock match. you were one of the people that helped with the blue lock project, despite your precious little brother being there. you didn't revealed to your brother that you were one of the people. you were always behind the scenes. what you meant is, you were one of the people for the wild card. itoshi sae locked eyes with you for a moment but the male completely ignored your existence.

you were a bit offended but that's that, too think he would choose that shidou guy. literally what's in that goddamn mind of that midfielder. "[name], i never expected for your brother to developed quickly." you glanced at anri, crossing your arms. "looks like he found his dream." with a gentle smile, you looked at the screen that displayed your brother.

something that i could never had. a dream.

on the day of the match, you didn't even tried to hide your identity. despite being a famous athlete with many rewards received. oh, what a luck — you coincidentally met itoshi sae while on the way to the blue lock locker's room. "we have met before, right?" monotone voice. he had always have that type of voice. to think he still remembered you from that time when you two were still a child. it was only one time though, when you guys met as kids.

"yeah."

"nii-chan, the ice cream im looking for isn't here..."

"are you looking for this?" child you met itoshi sae and his younger brother at a convenience store. the teal eyes of the younger brother looked at you and the ice cream back to back, feeling awkward by it, you just gave the ice cream to the younger brother. you saw how his eyes lit up and for some reason it warmth your heart seeing the younger boy happy — maybe because it reminded you of your own little brother...

"you should thank her, rin."

"it's okay. i don't mind."

"thank you, nee-chan!"

ah. how cute. you definitely won't forget these two siblings that you coincidentally met. one had a clean hairstyle while the other have a messy and horrible hairstyles (you know who you are). what an interesting pair. you waved to them goodbye and after that you never met them again.

"i never thought you will remembered me after all these years."

"i was just guessing."

bullshit

"if you'll excuse me, i have somewhere to go.."

sae suddenly tug on the sleeve of your blouse and he looked at you with an unreadable expression. "you're coming to watch for who?" why is he asking you this? it's not like you guys were close or anything. tbh, ppl who tug or touch you and not to mention if they're a stranger, you will definitely get annoyed by them. "i came for blue lock... itoshi." he let go off your sleeve after he hears the irritated voice you have even though you were smiling. itoshi sae weren't really stupid in this kinds of stuff.

you waved him goodbye just like last time...

seeing your precious little brother you rush up to him and hug him. nagi wasn't expecting a hug to come so basically the two of you fell, with nagi being the pillow. "ouch." nagi groaned, the blue lock players didn't expect someone to come (other than anri and ego) and suddenly hugged nagi. wait a minute.

the person who just hugged nagi seishiro seems familiar...

"isn't that [stage name]? the famous female badminton player." hiori spoke up among them.

wait what.

a shocked gasps could be heard around the room, some are uninterested and some are flabbergasted how nagi could know someone so famous. reo watched the scene and didn't expected this either, he also didn't know that you would come to the match since he didn't even contact you (nagi also didn't).

the female was patting nagi's head also! some were jealous of nagi because a famous and a beautiful woman is doing that to him. just what are their relationship?

"sei, do your best on the match, okay? nee-san will be watching you."

WHAT. [stage name] is nagi's older sister. jaw dropped, mouth open.

"bye bye!"

just as you got out of the room, everyone looked at nagi. nagi being nagi, he made a confused face with his signature :x face. reo took the honor of explaining that, yes; indeed you were nagi's sibling. the fact that you having a siblings wasn't mentioned at all on the internet and suddenly you were revealed as nagi's older sister to them was shocking enough. no one knew of this information, i mean even your name isn't your real name.

in another country...

the blue lock project ended, you have nothing to do with it now. your little brother become a pro soccer player and the fact of you being his older sister went viral on every platform — 'the number one female badminton player in the world is nagi seishiro's older sister!? how long have she kept this from us?" you scrolled the comments on twitter about the post and had a laugh with it since some of the replies were just ridiculous.

'holy shit what... my bae [stage name] have a little brother?!? how could i have not known this.'

'is this a family full off prodigy? they should show us their parents too!' that's probably never gonna happen, you thought.

'ZOO WEE MAMA, BOTH OF THEM ARE FABULOUS JUST LIKE THE ITOSHI BROTHERS!!!' oh? interesting. being compared to those two brothers.

'[stage name] future's partner are gonna be so lucky...' your future partner, you don't think that you could find one tbh. maybe if you quit being this exhausting pro athlete, you would find one.

ding!

who?

huh.

itoshi sae?

ah, no.

it's an interview request and the other people that you would work with is itoshi sae...

you immediately accepted it, the reason for it was simple. you were bored and maybe having itoshi sae, the man who is very rude to interviewer and working with him on this interview might be interesting. you just wanted to find some fun in your life.

everything was ready for the interview, your clothes, makeup, mic on and everything. they said that you and itoshi sae will be answering questions with a lie detector on. it was a good idea. you want to see the face on itoshi sae change, even in the slightest, you would be happy with it. you greeted the staff with a smile while itoshi sae is beside you being quiet.

"let's get this over with." sae murmured with a slight annoyance voice. averting your gave from him, you look at the set-up for the interview. a seat across from each other with a table in the middle — on the table, there's the device called the lie detector (made from the mikage corporation, this is the real deal). you two sat across from each other with hands already set in the lie detector.

"ready? action!"

let's just escape the greetings and move to the questions...

"itoshi sae, what's your first impression of [stage name]. you two may have met, right? on the u-20 japan soccer team vs blue lock!"

"i didn't really talk to her but one thing about her is fake smile."

"why is that?"

"just a feeling."

this guy... is really only good at soccer. he really can't make something up, huh? was my smile really fake that time? blunt much. i can't show my annoyance to it, i just have to act like i always do.

the lie detector make a sound of approvement — indicating he was telling the truth. you just hoped that after this interview it wouldn't go wrong on the internet. you hated how he knows that you're faking it, you have always been good at lying, everything. without the presence of your parents, you became independent on you own and the aunties around your neighborhood always have something to say about your parents or your little brother. you hated it. you hated how they gave backhanded compliments to you — saying that you are a good girl and maybe you should become their daughters instead of your parent.

"[name], you should stop trying too hard. get some rest."

"will they come?"

"[name]..."

i just wanted my parent attention, that's all. i mean, i have been dedicating my life on nagi. i just want some attention — i don't want attention from my friends but my parent. that's all i ask for, maybe if they did give me attention one day. maybe i can quit being the 'prodigy'. im tired, i don't find anything fun anymore. i have lost that feeling ever since i started doing sports.

"[stage name], what about you? what's your first impression of itoshi sae."

"he's really blunt, straightforward, very serious. personality like him would never find a girlfriend."

"what."

itoshi sae finally talked to you. you could definitely feel the annoyance radiating off him after you said that. the staff sweats at the both of you and yet you still kept a smile on even after saying that. you could go cancelled for this or be praised — it looks like the lie detector didn't sense a lie from you and make a ding sound. he frowned at you and you averted your eyes from him, looking around the room.

"this is a question for you both. if you were to live in a fantasy world with monsters. will you guys worked with eachother."

"no."

the fact that the both of you replied at the same time. twitter gonna have so much fun with this interview when it comes out... and luckily the two of you didn't get that electric shock. you sigh at the awkward silence after that and wished this interview will end.

"do you like soccer, [stage name]? considering your little brother is also a soccer player like itoshi sae."

"just to not get shock by the lie detector... i don't really liked soccer. i don't mind it but i probably have some memories with it that i don't want to remembered."

ding!

'no shock...' sae thought, he was actually glad that you didn't say anything bad about soccer. you and him already have a problem with each other tho.

time flies fast and finally the interview ended. you stretched your arms as it were a little sore. you prepared yourself to leave the building but you wanted to do one last thing before you go. "itoshi, it was nice working with you." sae felt like that was backhanded. your voice didn't sound convincing enough that he was a pleasant to work with at all. it was sarcastic even.

"i don't want to work with you again."

"you'll be seeing me a lot more."

why are you ain't even bothered with sae. even when he said that. "btw, you should probably reconcile with your brother. it won't do you any good." you added before leaving him alone. reconcile with rin? how is sae gonna do that, if he doesn't even have any communication skills (the two brothers suck at socializing but sae is still better at that). anything that comes out of your mouth is just nonsense (in denial).

what the hell.

how did sae meet you again, at his practice too? you waved at him when you two locked eyes and he glared at you for your friendliness towards him. he was too focused on his thoughts that he didn't even noticed you are already beside him. sae's leg was stepping on the soccer ball, you looked at it and stole it from him (using your legs ofc). sae was startled from the sudden feeling of the ball's absence and he saw you running away with the ball.

sae wanted to open his mouth and said something but went against it. he chased after you to get the ball back from you. luckily, there was no one there to witness the two of you — it will become an embarrassing moments for you and him. "you probably have only played soccer once?" sae did managed to catch up with you and you stuck out your tongue at him — you dribbled past him. "you're going easy on me, right? well, don't do it. go all out."

that definitely lit a spark inside sae. you? a badminton player challenging him? he maybe is underestimating you, but that didn't mattered at this point. he will show you, how good he is. while you were basically fighting for the ball, you two were exchanging remarks and sae was glad you could handle his cruel remarks.

it felt like rivalry at this point. you two weren't even in the same sports...

"stop disappointing me, itoshi."

"shut your damn mouth."

"my parents will cry if they heard that from you."

you were definitely a genius — he won't denied it anymore, you managed to score two goals against him. you said that you only watched clips. "yk itoshi, maybe if we're friends.. i will tell you my secrets." it felt like you were mocking him. it felt like the time he was in spain, the feeling when he was..

'he's not saying anything.' you looked at him and stopped your movements. he also stopped — he is definitely giving you a death stare now. is he gonna devour you? probably not.

"we should stop."

"no."

sae is definitely closer to you now — despite having a tall figure for a woman, sae was still taller than you and he was practically kinda trying to assert dominance (in your perspective). this is his weakness, and you found it.

"atleast, i don't sleep 5 hours a day."

ah, he was only going to say that.

"are you stalking me? i didn't know the itoshi sae is a stalker!"

"im not."

in the end, he's still not good enough. he knew he lose to you and you were still smiling like a crazy person to him. he feels a nudged and saw a water bottle up his face, you gave it to him. you didn't say anything to him and just quietly sipped your water bottle without even looking at him. sae was a different story, he keep on side glances to his side — which is you. you had an unreadable expression, your eyes weren't shining, it never was, even when you were playing soccer with him minutes ago. you were smiling but your eyes isn't.

is he the first one to noticed this side of you?

things happened between you two. some people thought you were rival. some people shipped you two, which is funny. some people just found you two as a funny duo. the social medias actually went crazy when the interview video came out. not expecting a duo like you two to came up. they also thought that itoshi sae would actually rejected the offer since you know...

they had a blast with it.

'LMAOOOO, [stage name] IS SO BRAVE FOR SAYING THAT SAE IS RUDE.'

'sae was side eyeing [stage name], fr.'

'me personally wouldn't let that slide if someone said that im faking a smile.'

'say thank you to this show for letting us see this unexpected duo!!'

'PLSPLSPLS I WANT TO SEE THE NAGI'S SIBLINGS NEXT ON THIS SHOW. IT WOULD BE SO FUN!'

'have you guys ever thought what's [stage name] real name is? i mean we know that her surname is nagi, then what's her first name?'

replies:

'if she doesn't want to reveal it, it's her choice.'

'who cares.'

'lmao, she already stated that her name is a secret she doesn't want to reveal.'

your relationship with sae developed more over the years. you could probably see some edits of them at tik tok from time to time as a duo they said. his cold remarks make you wanna slap him but you would get cancel for that. you had some photoshoot with him. surprisingly he was ACTUALLY a pleasant to work with. you pity the interviewer who had to face his cold behavior in the past — but you still slightly dislike itoshi sae.

eating a pavlova at a cute cafe that you find aesthetically pleasing to the eyes while you were taking a walk. you were just scrolling on your phone, texting your little brother if he's doing good there. tbh, you missed taking care of nagi. even if your childhood was basically forced to be taken away from you the moment nagi was born. itoshi sae and his brother had a strained relationship based on your observations, you wouldn't know much about it since both of them are private of their life and doesn't revealed it to the public (just the same as you). you could see it that sae still cared for his brother since rin would do anything to avoid him but sae is making a slight effort at talking to him.

they would never reconcile at this point. it's pointless if they're sitting around without taking action — but fortunately you're not one to get involved into family matters.

oh how lucky it is that this party is called the 'blue lock reunion' — is your secret of being involved with the blue lock project gonna be revealed? only one good thing is that you get to see your brother. "you actually did come, [stage name]." anri was the first one to greet you and you greeted back to her. she said that ego is also in the party well technically she forced him too. you had some things to catch up with her and soon enough you leave the conversation and just basically roam around the party. you looked at your surroundings on how the former blue lock players were so happy. they admitted that they actually missed ego and anri. "nee-san? what are you doing here." i guess it's time for you to come clean...

"ahaha... i was one of the staff.."

"what."

"yeah."

"you were in japan all along when i was in blue lock?"

you hummed and didn't say anything yet until you were pulled into a hug by you own brother. you felt like crying because this is the first time nagi actually hugged you since it was always you giving the affection. maybe, nagi was homesick... you patted his back and laugh it off. why is your little brother taller than you so much?

"thank you, nee-san. for taking care of me all these years."

why is he thanking you? it was your responsibility to take care of him — but, it's nice to see nagi matured now.

"sei, you've matured."

this was such a scene to cry on for nagi's friend. the hug only lasted for 5 minutes (nagi wanted more minutes but you said you were tired of tip toeing to him). the fact that nagi was talking alot, only to you tho. like he was basically telling you everything that happened to catch up with you. in a corner, there was basically someone who was staring at you two, probably thinking if that could be him and his brother one day. like the old days. basically you were looking at nagi in a loving manner, like a mother does.

at this point, your social battery went out. you feel like the party has gone for too long. it was exhausting you. a matter of fact, you just wanna lay in bed right now but that didn't work as there was a familiar face walking towards you. you guess it, it's itoshi rin. the younger brother of itoshi sae. if you mentioned sae right now, rin might just turned away from you or looked at you with disgust because you said that man's name.

"[stage name], are you dating him?"

"eh?"

you felt like your soul was coming out of body. visibly shocked that rin would ask you that. you thought he was just gonna say something and immediately left after that. is he thinking that his brother is dating you?

"im not dating anyone though..." you stated and rin looked at you suspiciously.

"good."

basically that was the first interaction you had with itoshi rin. both of them are really similar in personalities. itoshi sae would kill you if he heard that. you decided that you are gonna leave the party so you searched for anri to informed her, you were going to left but she was nowhere to be found so you only told your brother and left. you wanted to have some time alone. you rode your motorcycle in the middle of the night like you used to do when you were in highschool. your usual stop is a beach and god decided to give you a surprise.

itoshi sae was at the beach gazing at the sea. you doubt that he didn't heard the motorcycle sounds, he's probably here for the same reason as you. the light from the moon shone against the sea wave creating a beautiful scenery for you and him. he didn't looked back to see the person who decided to disturb his peace at the beach.

"didn't know you could ride a motorcycle, [stage name]." ah, he knew it was you and yet he still didn't bothered to look at you. his voice was slightly off from the tone of voice you used to hear from him.

"everyone have their own melancholy time. right, itoshi?"

you always came here to gathered your thoughts when you were in highschool.

"you're the worst for not giving me an alone time."

"don't be like that, itoshi. i have always come to this place when i was a teenager."

"then share this place with me. bring me with you whenever you want to go to this place."

"is this your way of saying 'i love you' to me?"

"hmph."

he's not denying it. is he being serious? this is the first time someone confesses to you like this. it was always with the straightforward i like you and those typical cheesy lines that you could see in a romance drama. for the first time, sae turned his back from you.

"you're not smiling."

"do you want me to smile all the time?"

"i don't care if you're not smiling but... i want you to smile with your eyes once."

you slightly widen your eyes at what sae said. did he saw your expression just now? what's with this guy always understanding you. he reminds you of someone, someone you left long ago. your lips turned into a thin line before you spoke again.

"sure, i will bring you to this place whenever i want too."

the winds from the beach make your silky hair to be swayed from it. you looked beautiful to him. is this the end of your rivalry with him? yup, definitely. the start of a new relationship with you. maybe you will smile with your eyes for him now.

"itoshi, have you played with the water here?"

"sae."

"you want me to call you that?"

"yeah."

"didn't know you like older woman."

"and i didn't know you like a younger man from you."

"pfft."

a few weeks after you guys became lover, you guys relationship was publicly announced by an acc that keep track of what's happening in the soccer community. some people did believed it untill the two of you released a statement. you two qrt the post.

'yes, i am dating the world famous badminton female player. stop saying it's fake news under the post.'

'yeah, i am dating the itoshi sae. lol.'

the relationship between you two shocked the world and especially the former blue lock players. your brother cannot believe it but he also release a tweet. the fans thought that this was a funny moments now they are only waiting for the other itoshi to release a tweet too to captured this moment.

'lmao, i also didn't know my sister was dating someone.'

replies:

'WHAT THE HELL.. EVEN NAGI DIDN'T KNOW HAHAHHAHA.'

'now i wanna know what does the other one thinks.'

'that's crazy bro...'

'we need update about their relationship and how it happened.'

"meow."

your pet cat was purring at your lap. the cat already ate, and it was probably feeling playful. your cat was a british shorthair breed. what's the cat name? lokhi. loki but with a h. you just wanted the cat to fit choki, you brother's cactus. it you who gifted it to him. you found it funny how now you're dating itoshi sae. you've never dated anyone in your life neither have you liked someone too. do you love sae? yes. he was one of the people that understand you and you have no doubt that sae haven't dated someone either. so you two basically were a rookie at dating but things worked out!

you two have a tight schedule and fortunately after the big revealed you two are dating, alot of shows are begging for you two to come to do the interview but you didn't wanted that. you only took the photoshoot offer with sae. you especially liked the time when you two photoshoot for dior. it was the little moments that you loved.

intentionally brushing your hands at sae's hand and he looked at you, confused — you're just making an innocent face at him. it's funny really how you two are still trending on twitter. people are still freaking out by this and you kinda felt bad for rin when the day you got together with sae was the day rin asked is the two of you dating. you just hoped that whenever sae get back to japan to visit his parent, rin wouldn't say anything.

two years in the relationship and you smiled with your eyes for the first time on the 1st anniversary. you were happy that sae stayed with you, giving you the attention. the unconditional love you never had from your parents. he knew you loved cinnamoroll, so he gave you a bouquet of it. your parents knew of you two relationship. sae's parent response was positive but for your parent... i mean they were traveling around the world, who cares about their opinion.

you never thought that he would be your first love and lover. you hope that he was the groom to your bride. oh, not to mentioned you met his parent formally and his brother too.. ofc. you managed to make rin like you and reconcile their strained relationship and yet you still see them not talking to each other from time to time. you doted on rin because it feels like you were taking care of nagi. sae didn't said anything about doting on his little brother, he appreciates it since it feels like the first time the brothers met you.

you liked ice cream. they do too.

sae become more affectionate with you now since it was always you gotta peck him on the lips. you definitely want to marry this guy and he want to marry you too.

note: done. this thing is more than 1k, im sure of it. WAJJH IM FINALLY FREEEE.. i don't really think this is enemy to lover so I'm really sorry for this like umm weird shit idk lah... have fun.

[tora-the-cat]

💚: What does everyone else get wrong about your favorite character(s)?

oh. oh we could be here for DAYS. okay. I'll do the first five characters that come to mind, and ONE thing for each character I'm thinking about lol

Sakura- because who else would I start with? I think the biggest pet-peeve I have with general characterization of her is she's just. too normal. Whether you're writing her as a lovesick teenager or a terrifying baby badass, so many people tend to overlook that she does NOT have typical responses to situations. She has moodswings. She's impulse. Her empathy is abysmally low. her capacity for self confidence should be studied. she's an annoying know-it-all. her priorities are FUCKED. The problem is that she THINKS she's the most normal person in any given room, and too many viewers have fallen for her act. she felt accountability for 5 seconds and proceeded to poison all of her friends to try and go kill sasuke without stopping to ask herself if that's even something she's emotionally capable of trying (it isn't).

Minato- honestly, my main complain about him is similar in principle- people ALSO write him as a Normal Cool Guy, because that's how he presents and thinks of himself. He's the Ideal Shinobi, almost perfect, almost a messiah, given how people- in and out of universe- talk about him. But the thing is...he is the Ideal Shinobi. And, by nature of that, there is something deeply wrong with him. He killed an entire army's worth of people in a day and is remembered as a peace-maker. Kishimoto thinks this is normal, so the narrative thinks Minato is a good guy, so he's remembered fondly in the story and most of the fandom. Kishimoto is wrong. Minato was suited for the life and glory of an S-Rank shinobi in the sort of way we only see otherwise presented in heartless nuke-nin for the rest of the show.

Sasuke- Everything that Sasuke has ever, ever done has been for love. He doesn't move a muscle without thinking about the people he loves. His heart doesn't beat unless it can do so for someone else. People miss this because of his obsession with revenge or whatever, but he was doing that out of love for his clan. for his family. for, even, his brother, who he somehow devestatingly loved even before he knew Itachi wasn't to blame. Itachi set his entire world on fire when he was seven and then put him in a torture hallucination replaying it for days, and Sasuke still loved him. After everything he heard Danzo did, he still gave that bastard the chance to plea his case before killing him. Sasuke doesn't have a single cruel bone in his body.

Hinata- Hinata is a fighter. She loves, and she watches, and she's never met a fight she won't pick given half a chance. She put herself between her father's wrath and her sister. She fought Neji because Naruto was cheering on the sidelines. She only managed to confess her love when she jumped in to an impossible fight against Pein for Naruto. I don't think she ever wins a fight in Naruto (which is bullshit), but that's never hindered her undying fighting spirit.

Obito- Obito's tricky cause his characterization is contradictory and murky by nature so it's hard to argue the details of it, but you will never get me on board with a canon interpretation of him that isn't literally chronically dissociated for his entire adult life. I don't think he knows his name. I don't think he's looked in a mirror in years. I don't think he can tell you the date. I don't think he's felt anything but conviction since he held Rin's body in his arms.

IM STOPPING THERE. I CAN DO THIS FOREVER BUT I'M STOPPING THERE.