#but also there’s a misconception that the relationships have to 100% in all directions but that’s not true

[queer-ragnelle]

If y’all can keep track of the massive family trees in mythology you can track queer networks with more than three people. Throuples are great. But what if there were more queers. Consider that.

[fictionadventurer]

Here's my incredibly deep input: I ship Lily with the explorer badly. I was already leaning towards him but now I accidentally care way too much. He's The Secret Fourth Thing, structurally; i think it'd tie together nicely everything Lily's learnt from all the suitors; personally, this relationship sounds most intriguing and nuanced; and the dynamic is not only fun but also addresses the very concept of the unusual portal story. Additionally, the warrior's story with the matchmaker also has me 100% sold already - and he's the kinda guy I recognise as my usual fave type, so it's saying a lot. I know and love him already, give him a HEA - but i really want to get to know the explorer and see him grow alongside Lily. Pls write thnxxx

This is more-or-less what I was thinking before I wrote that post about Lily's dynamic with her suitors, but as I wrote everything out, I kept getting really attached to the warrior and second-guessing the dramatic and thematic possibilities of that plot, so I kept both options open.

Your points here make me want to dig into the issue again, so let's get analytical.

I love the dynamic between Lily and the explorer, for all the reasons you've listed. The main reason that I hesitated to partner them was that I couldn't quite believe that the explorer would be happy settling down. I worried there'd always be the chance that he'd get bored of domestic life and run off on more adventures. Also, the point of the story was that Lily would find a place to belong in this world. If she married the person who didn't quite fit in, could I truly say that she'd found a place to belong?

Yet, it's true that their dynamic ties directly into the portal fantasy theme. The story's about how Lily fell into a portal fantasy and never went on any adventures, so her natural counterpart is the guy who went on all the adventures. Their personalities also make more natural complements. They're similar (both outsiders to the community) in ways that are important to the theme, and different (cautious vs. adventurous, extrovert vs. introvert) in ways that are more direct opposites, which means they can balance each other out. I can't quite say the same about Lily and the warrior. He fits in while she's an outsider--but marrying him might imply that she's completely given up the side of herself that's shaped by our world. They're different types of introverts--not opposite enough to provide balance. He's active while she's intellectual, but that's a difference in interests (rather than in approaches to the world) that might be insurmountable. It's fun to see Lily overcome her misconceptions about him (and thus about the culture here), but it's not necessarily enough to make him the best choice of husband for her.

I could solve the problems with the Lily/explorer ship by altering the character and the arc of the explorer. Give him strong-enough family ties here that he's not a complete outsider. Make sure his arc shows that he's learning that life here can be just as exciting as life on the road. Show a caring and nurturing side to him. By the end of the story, Lily and the explorer should have both helped each other to grow. They're both still outsiders because of their experiences outside this society, but they've both helped each other find a way to belong that doesn't require them to erase that.

This endgame, since it's so thematically fitting, might be too obvious. But this isn't the genre you go to for huge plot twists, so it could still work if I have enough other interesting stuff surrounding it.

I'm still not sure I could bear to make the decision if I didn't have another partner for the warrior. Thankfully, I do, and it's a very fun dynamic. The warrior and the matchmaker complement and contrast each other in ways that are exact opposites to Lily and the explorer. The warrior and the matchmaker both fit in to this society--he fits in with the active fighter part of society, while she fits into the more feminine social realm--which means they fit well with each other. The matchmaker is an extrovert while he's an introvert, and her good social skills counteract his difficulty with them. They make a good counterpart to the pairing of Lily and the explorer, which makes for a neat and well-balanced story.

These ideas are still in early stages, but unless I find compelling reasons for a different outcome, this is a solid structure to start from.

[astrobydalia]

❄️ SIGNS IN THE HOUSES 🏠

Hello guys! Here’s a quick description of how each sign influences the houses. At the end of this post there’s a quick run through of what the houses represent so you can better apply the description to your case. Enjoy!

***DISCLAIMER: Remember that planets and placements can modify these energies!!!! This post is mostly aimed to better understand empty houses.

Credit: Tumblr Blog @astrobydalia

💪🏼 Aries: Where you have Aries in your chart represents the area of your life where you feel most independent and assertive. Could even be the area of your life where you adopt a more selfish attitude cus this could be where you feel most individualistic and where you prefer to walk solo or make your own decisions. This sign comes with a sexual undertone, not in a Scorpio way but more like this being an area of your life where you could feel empowered and therefore sexy. This might be where you feel like the first at something or where you just wanna go for it and have a leader/pioneer attitude.

💄 Taurus: where you have Taurus in your chart can represent where in your life you prefer to take things slowly and just enjoy every little step of the process. You just enjoy this house. It is where you might prefer to get things for yourself and then enjoy them, where you just like being pampered, all the luxury and taking care of yourself. This could be an area of your life in which you know exactly what you want from it and the part of your life that you just enjoy for the sake of it without any particular reason other than you just enjoy it. However, this is a house where you somehow get something from it. This house might be a source of relaxation, comfort and soothness.

⚙️ Gemini: where you have Gemini in your chart is the area of life where you may feel like you don’t know exactly know what you want so you’d rather browse through your options first. Bc of this, the house that rules this sign in your chart will be an area of big doubt and curiosity for quite some time. You’ll likely try to solve these doubts by gaining more intelectual knowledge like researching information, asking for opinions and stuff. Even when you have things a bit more figured out, you might still want this area of your life to have some “openness”. Can also be an area of your life where you’re somehow juggling two or more stuff.

🧸 Cancer: where you have Cancer in your chart is the area of your life where you’re more sentimental and where you like to be vulnerable. Could be where your family has some direct or indirect influence or where you take into account your family the most. You somehow relate the themes of this house to your family. The house that rules this sign in your chart will influence how you deal with your feelings and it’s where you’ll be driven mostly by them. There could be a strong sense of nostalgia and you may want to feel cared for here. This is an area of life where you just wanna follow your heart so to speak.

👑 Leo: where you have Leo in your chart is the area of your life where you take most pride in. This house will influence your sense of individuality and you’ll feel like what this house represents is part of what make you you and is basically part of you “brand” as person. It represents the area of your life where you may wanna feel like the protagonist or like you somehow stand out. In this house you could also showcast your natural talent or what the house represents will be part of your natural talent(s) and where you see a source fun. In this house is where you might find flings.

🧽 Virgo: where you have Virgo in your chart is the area of life where you feel like you should act more methodical and deliberately. Where you feel like you need to make plans, itineraries and mental lists for everything. Or is simply an area of your life where you have a set plan or expectation. Where everything falls “according to plan” or like it’s supposed to. This is an area of your life where you wanna keep things simple and predictable and where you may be most efficient and helpful. In this house there could be a sense of wanting to do something for others somehow and where you caritative spirit is showcased.

🖼 Libra: where you have Libra in your chart is the area of your life where you like to collaborate with others, ask for options or feedback so that everyone is happy. This is an area of your life where you only wanna see harmony and you just want to enjoy it peacefully, but unlike Taurus, this is something you wanna enjoy with an other not just yourself. This is an area where you feel the most beautiful or where you see everything as beautiful and/or artistic. This can also represent the area where you usually find your romantic partners and most likely where you’ll find partners with whom you’ll have a commited relationship.

⛓ Scorpio: where you have Scorpio in your chart is the area of your life where you may find more turbulence or drama such as abuse, bullying, things constantly going wrong etc. This is an area of your life that could be source of trauma, but also deep self-discovery. Could indicate where in your life you feel sexualized or where you find sexual partners, where you lost your virginity, found your sexuality, etc. This will be an area of your life that will force you to change or upgrade constantly or you could feel like you’re the one who needs to constantly change or upgrade this house’s themes. You could find that this part of your life is full of ugly, uncomfortable, taboo stuff.

📚 Sagittarius: where you have sagittarius in your chart is the area of your life where you are most optimistic and hopeful. It’s where you found your wisdom or where you feel the most wise or where you become wiser. This area of your life could have been very eventful and you may feel wise about this house bc you feel like you’ve seen it and experienced it all, but you still have more to go and learn. You could see this house as a source of adventure, thrill, fun, exploration and knowledge. This area of of your life could be influenced by religion, higher knowledge, a lot of smart or wise people around, foreigners, traveling etc.

📊 Capricorn: where you have Capricorn in your chart is the area of your life where you are mostly serious and strategic. You want no bullshit when it comes to this house, you want things serious and long-lasting. SERIOUS is the key word here. This will be a part of your life that will take you time and practice to really get the hang of and you may need to work hard in order to master it. You may find yourself struggling with this house for some time. Like Virgo, you want things to be predictable with this house but Capricorn also wants things to be 100% reliable and long-term. When you finally see things going well with this house, it’s always gonna give you a sense of victory.

🪅 Aquarius: where you have Aquarius in your chart is the area of your life where you are more innovative and socially-aware. It might as well be where you find your best friends, like your BEST best friends. This can be where you may have felt like you were smarter or where your ideas are seen as bizarre or genious. In this house you may have to deal with lots of people, crowds or the general public, so this is where you are most socially active. You may care about this house and could commit to it, but you don’t want to feel too attached to it either. This is bc you may wanna stay experimental and open minded about this house bc you wanna get a sense of freedom from it.

🪄 Pisces: where you have Pisces in your chart is the area of you life idolize the most. This is the house you resort to in order to escape. This house could also give you a strong sense of longing, like you made a wish upon a star when it comes to this house and you may hope that one day you’ll get it. This house can also give you a sense of hopelessness, like you may not ever get or entirely grasp or understand those house’s themes. It can also give you a feeling like you don’t exactly know what’s going on with this house and you either roll with it or get anxious about it. You could have lots of misconceptions about this house too. This is an area of your life that could be source of creativity or spirituality.

THE HOUSES

1st house: the sign you have here is your personality, this is the vibe you give, how you see life and what you attract from it.

2nd house: the sign you have here represents how’s your self-worth, your possessions, your body, your way of making money and gaining things for yourself 

3rd house: the sign you have here represents your school life, neighborhood, the way you chat, your opinions, the way think or learn and your siblings

4th house: your home and family life, your basic emotionality and your family tree

5th house: your leisure times, hobbies, your children or inner child, flings, your self expression

6th house: your daily life, routine, your 9 to 5 job, acts of service and your health

7th house: your romantic life, how you are when you connect with others and the type of people you attract

8th house: your sexuality, your traumas and your shadow side, things about yourself that you hide bc you feel they’re wrong

9th house: university (or any higher study), religion, traveling, anything foreign and your beliefs

10th house: what you aspire to achieve and who you’ll grow to be once you mature, your career, your vocations public image and reputation

11th house: your friendship life, groups and communities, public settings and your view towards world or socially related issues

12th house: your imagination, what you subcountiously attract and desire, your dreams and fears, your soul, spirituality

Credit: Tumblr Blog @astrobydalia

[overthinkingfandom]

So I've been mulling over your stone theory for a while now, and while I'm not sure I'm 100% sold on the staged finale theory, I DO have to admit the stone theory makes a very compelling case towards the staged finale, and I really think a lot of your interpretations of c!Dream feels pretty accurate. Three times feels like too much to be a coincidence when you're gathering stone lol. I'm eager to see more evidence about the staged finale theory whenever you get to it!

Anyways, since 1/3 of the stone theory involves c!Wilbur, I'm curious: how do you see his and c!Dream's relationship? And do you have any predictions on what might happen between them?

c!Dream and c!Wilbur's relationship is so interesting.

There's this common misconception going around that during season 1 they had a negative relationship or even hated each other but that was never actually the case.

c!Wilbur admired c!Dream from day 1. Even as he used him as a convenient enemy to draw people to his side and gain legitimacy for L'manburg, he still expressed that same admiration alongside the words of contempt.

c!Dream on the other hand started off much more neutral. He considered the whole idea of L'manburg foolish and so didn't have the highest opinion on those who tried to create it. But he didn't have particularly strong feelings towards them other than thinking they're delusional and/or stupid.

The independence war was a bit of a turning point. It ended up as a win-win with both c!Wilbur and c!Dream getting what they wanted out of it. c!Wilbur got the position he wanted and c!Dream got a leader who would know to toe the line and not start shit with him. They had this mutual understanding going on for a while and that fed into their Pogtopia interactions.

The vassal conversation is a great microcosm of their dynamic, but is unfortunately often misunderstood. There wasn't any manipulation involved in the deal itself in either direction. Hell, there was barely any time for manipulation to happen considering that the moment c!Wilbur actually explained that he wants TNT to blow up L'manburg with, c!Dream answers "Where can I meet you?"

However, there sure is a whole bunch of attempted manipulation on both their parts. c!Wilbur pulls out the entire playbook of salesmen tricks in order to try and convince c!Dream. c!Dream navigates a veritable minefield of questioning in order to keep his "I changed my mind and I'm now on Pogtopia's against Schlatt, no really" act going.

And the funniest thing about it all is that they both see right through the other, which renders the manipulation useless.

And that's at the heart of their dynamic. They're peers, both expert social players despite using different styles. They don't let each other get away with anything, but a lot of that comes from a place of respect as they can see the skill going into it. It's almost like a friendly competition.

(You can bet that if c!Wilbur was around at the time of the disc finale he wouldn't have let that pass quietly. Even just in his conversation with c!Tommy after it he keeps questioning how c!Tommy and c!Tubbo beat c!Dream and is discontent with how c!Tommy is unable to give him a proper answer.)

Predicting how their relationship is going to go is pretty hard since a lot of it is dependent on exactly what Dream's plan is and would be his state of mind once he leaves prison. And also on some aspects of how the revival book works exactly and if/how it allows them to communicate but that gets more into tinhatting territory.

Something interesting that we may see on c!Wilbur's side is his admiration turning into idealization. He has a tendency to view things in extremes, a kind of black and white thinking. You're with him or against him. He's in the role he wants to be or he's a total failure. You're someone to be admired or you're someone to look down on. There's little in between.

No clue on how that idealization may manifest though. c!Wilbur doesn't really admire anyone the way he admire c!Dream. Even in his important relationships - like c!Tommy, c!Quackity or c!Phil - he doesn't respect them, in large part because he can get away with a lot of manipulation tricks since they don't have the knowledge or skill to keep up with him (c!Quackity isn't nearly the manipulator he thinks he is). So there's not really any baseline to compare it to.

It could manifest as either something constructive or something destructive. Or even both, depending on the state of his mental health at the time. Either way, it's definitely going to be a treat seeing them finally interacting again.

[mercurytrinemoon]

Me debunking astrology generalizations and misconceptions or smth idk...

Squares and oppositions aren't pure evil. 

I can't believe I have to say this because I thought ya'll have learnt the characteristics of every aspect but here we are. Nothing in astrology is black and white. And I saw some ridiculous statements (not necessary here on tumblr) that said things like "if your Venus squares someone's ascendant then you don't find that person attractive AT ALL". Or "Mars square Mercury people can't speak politely and have an annoying voice". Like????? First of all, that's ridiculous. Second of all, square in not "everything bad" just like trine is not "everything amazing". Squares bring tension, which leads to motivation, they’re stimulating; sometimes excitement or charisma; sometimes they can make you overdo things. I'm not saying they're oh-so-marvelous because the challenges are still there, but they're not as bad as people paint them to be. Squares happen between two signs that are in the same modality so they have a bunch of things in common. Besides, some of them (Sagi-Pisces and Gemini-Virgo) are ruled by the same planet so there's a special type of chemistry between those (especially when applied to synastry). Oppositions work in two ways, planets either meet in the middle - opposite signs usually complete each other and fuel each other up. And worse case scenario? Natally this means being pulled in two different directions; synastry-wise, you can completely miss each other like two passing cars - so there may be some misunderstandings but I don't think that's the end of the world... And, as per usual, may be mitigated by other positive aspects.

This is me debunking other people's attempts at debunking Sun sign compatibility. 

Sun IS very important but when people ask about compatibility and go with Suns... and then someone tries to be a smartass and debunk the "compatible-incompatible" and does the same thing without even realizing it. Like, "oh I actually see a lot of Aries and Pisces having amazing relationships because *insert someting that is a total stretch and refers to their Sun sign traits*"... But you seem to forget that they're neighbouring signs... which means they probably have personal planets in those neighbouring signs... which means they're compatible not because of some made-up stuff that you're trying to come up with but because their other planets are compatible with each other. But you're still feeding into the Sun sign compatibility talk. (So like, what I'm trying to also say, yes, the entire synastry chart comes into play; Also, side note, everyone can get along on some level if they’re mature enough).

Planet in a sign is NOT the same as planet in the house. 

There may be some overlaps in some of the sign-houses associations (like in the overall energy; like for example, it sort of makes sense that 3rd, 7th and 11th are referred to as “air houses” because they’re the most social) but in NO WAY there are similarities between planet house position and the "ruling" sign. That association started a few decades ago and some would say that NOT linking houses with signs is a purely traditional approach. But there’s plenty of professional modern astrologers with 20/30/40-year experience who still differentiate between sign/house position... because they know (and have learnt along the way) that there’s a huge difference.

I'll give you 3 quick examples: Gemini planets and 3rd house planets both may put emphasis on communication, mental stimulation and gathering data. But Geminis are often scattered in their approach, they may be easily distracted, may be indecisive, may be jack of all trades and talkative jokesters. They actually hate routines and dullness. "Spice it up" is probably a Gemini's philosophy. Now 3rd house planets may indicate you actually LIKE doing things on the regular - like running errands every other day in the mornings or going to that one specific coffee shop to pick up a snack. You may actually work in logistics or as a postman (especially if your chart ruler or MC ruler is in the 3rd). Planets in the 3rd talk about your siblings, neighbours or school experiences - like having Venus in the 3rd may point to positive experiences within those areas - something Gemini Venus has nothing in common.

Venus in the 9th can study at an art/beauty or fashion school (or even teach there if the MC is involved); can be very attached to spiritual and religious matters; can also find love in a foreign land. But imagine it being in Taurus - rather shy, needing those stable values to feel secure, being an exceptionally great student at that art school thanks to its domicile. Venus in Sagittarius on the other hand, likes adventure, things being shaken up from time to time, lightheartedness and exploration. But what if we flip the scenario and that Sag Venus is in the 2nd house. This can denote earing money through travelling and looking for ways to expand but in a financial matters.

Continuing with the Venus examples, having Venus in Aries is completely different than Venus in the 1st. What do people usually say about Venus in the 1st? That it makes the native charming, lovely, well-put together, with great manners, maybe beautiful, graceful, maybe a bit shallow. When in Aries? None of these characteristics fit, on top of that, it's in its detriment. Our poor gal Venus is uncomfortable and confused in Aries. She's like, "conquer? Swords? Selfishness? Obnoxiousness? Sparring? You're telling me to fight people? What am I doing here???" 

And I'll leave you here with that cause those examples weren’t that quick lol and in fact, I could give you a 100 of those. Besides, this actually inspired a 3-page rant that I've already posted not so long ago that you can read HERE.

There's no such thing as "more accurate" astrology. 

Both western and vedic are valid. Both can show you the same things. JUST KEEP THEM SEPARATE AND DON'T MIX THEM WITH EACH OTHER. And don't say things like "sidereal shows your soul" - omg I saw this statement soooo many times, who the hell even came up with this?! Actually, if anything, it's the modern western approach that "psychologized" (yea I just made up a word, you mad?) astrology while Jyotish still sticks to the very real "here and now", sometimes fatalistic predictions of how exactly your life is going to roll out... But hey, reach for hellenistic methods and they can tell you the same things, just with different tools. So no, they do not show different things, it's just their language is different.

If you say you don't identify with your chart then you're just reading it wrong.

This partially connects to the last one in some ways... Switching to a different astrology or different charts is not a solution. Learn how to read your natal. If you say it doesn’t describe you, I can guarantee you that you haven’t studied it properly. (Now this hasn't turned into a rant yet but I may actually do a whole-ass post on this because if I start elaborating on it now I'll end up with another 3-page essay).

Learn how and when to generalize. Also learn how to take generalizations. 

I understand that you have to pick up on every single thing separately in order to put everything together. It's like learning a new language: first you need to learn individual words and then you need to know the proper grammar to create a full sentence. This is 100% understandable and necessary, but it's important to take the entire thing into consideration. And this goes for all branches of astrology, but I guess it's especially annoying with synastry. This, again, comes down to the very black and white approach. You know, like when you see those long paragraphs where people elaborate on all the intricacies of Venus-Pluto aspects or whatever as if that one thing was determining the entire relationship between two people. (Side note, no shade but some of ya'll should start writing fiction or poetry cause the amount of fluffy speech and waffle that I see floating around here on tumblr is insane sometimes). Why are you wording everything as a make it or break it type of situation? And on the receiving end - learn how to take *properly phrased* generalizations constructively. Example: it IS a rule that Aries is a competitive one, maybe you're not one of them (for many reasons) but don't make a fuss about someone saying this. It IS a basic rule that energies of the same sign in two people are going to get along (well that depends on the planets involved but I digress), if that, for some other reasons, doesn't apply to you, don't go yelling that it's bullcrap because you hate people of the same sign. You know? Like, learn the difference.

DON'T SCARE PEOPLE WITH ASTROLOGY.

I had a mini-rant on this one a while ago, but I think this deserves a constant reminder (and refers to the last point), I don't want to see any more posts that would say things like "xxx house placements will bring you suffering" or "stay away from people with planets in your xxx house" or, even worse, making a (completely untrue btw) prediction based on one single thing like "someone with so-and-so aspect is going to harm you". And you're so casual about it??? You know there are sensitive people in the world. Learn some ethics. Learn some counseling skills. Don't be ignorant. Don't throw these random stuff at people just like that. And learn some actual astrology cause most of these aren't even closely describing that particual aspect. LIKE WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK.

Ok now I'm pissed again.

Studying astrology and believing in free will doesn’t go well together.

It's not just psychological and spiritual. It's useful to know that western astrology made it like that because there were still people threatening astrologers for using it as a divination tool. So they moved away from the predictive/deterministic aspect of it. Now, I'm not here to change anyone's beliefs cause that's a very personal thing that everyone should develop on their own. But once you start diving deeper into astrology you'd notice that there's a heavy emphasis on fatedness and things being predetermined. That includes both the good and the bad stuff and you should learn to accept that. And with the bad things specifically, let's not excuse it with some "oh that was an opportunity for growth". Like yea, maybe, occasionally??? But just acknowledge that sometimes things happen not because there was a deeper meaning in them... but because you have a Pluto-Mars conjunction in the 6th that makes an applying square to your chart ruler and you were going through a profection year where Mars was your time lord and it transited that chart ruler while making a conjunction with Neptune so you were attacked by a baby crocodile while swimming and it bit off your toe and you got a nasty infection and that’s it (I just made that up btw, I don't actually know anyone who was attacted by a crocodile). So like, sometimes shit just happens and there's nothing psychological about it. Also, I bet your free will didn't want to be attacked by that croc.

[tossawary]

Chapter 24: “Seeing is Believing” of “pride is not the word I’m looking for” random favorite lines and commentary. Not a full list or full commentary, but longer commentary than usual to talk about quest construction. 

-

AN: This was... a weird chapter to write. When I started outlining, I had... the conversation with Shen Qingqiu planned... the conversation with Shen Yuan planned... the fact that SQH, SY, LQG, and LFL was the quest party... and the fact that they get the Eye at the end of it. That was everything. 

The entire rest of this chapter came together FRIDAY LAST WEEK. 

Huan Hua Palace wasn’t going to be there. The Weeper didn’t exist. The Eye or its previous owner wasn’t at all connected to the Garden Master. The Shadow Cave Wolf Spiders didn’t exist. The murder plant didn’t exist. The mysterious monster showing up at the end wasn’t originally planned either. 

I mean, I had a lot of pre-existing plot threads to tie in and weave with, but ohhh boy! Picture someone lying facedown on a floor like, “I forgot to plan the contents of the super important quest...” 

I was originally going to have the Eye quest a lot simpler, but given the weight “Death of the Author” had when I finally reached this part of the story, that wasn’t really going to do! It had to be bigger than that! It needed oomph! This also felt like a good opportunity to really establish the new SQH-SY dynamic. To explore SY fumbling to find a place in this world without strict character role, especially in relation to settled and well-supported SQH. 

- 

“One attempts to remain dignified,” Shen Qingqiu agrees. “As there is little point in kicking and screaming about how such ignobility isn’t fair.”

“Ha! Is there ever?”

“Not in my experience.”

“Yeah, it’s definitely not cute when I do it,” Shang Qinghua jokes.

Shen Qingqiu’s lips actually twitch at that.

Success?!

- 

AN: I wasn’t going into this fic with the intention of writing any Shang Qinghua and Original Shen Qingqiu almost friendship! But it started developing and it seemed a shame not to explore Shang Qinghua developing a real relationship with Shen Qingqiu (though not a particularly close one) when the man is suppose to be the scum villain (and the readers know that the man might get replaced by Shen Yuan). 

I can see myself writing more Shang Qinghua and Original Shen Qingqiu content in the future. Someone dropped a particularly nice prompt for them in my inbox that I’m looking forward to exploring at some point. 

(I mean, not to say that Shang Qinghua has a type, but Shang Qinghua has a type and it’s handsome, deadly, intimidating, frosty men with a villainous character design and trust/abandonment and communication issues. I could make it work.)

- 

“Ah, well, two ‘ideal’ situations come to mind: severing the personal relationship for good… or, ah, talking about how to do better and trying that. You don’t have to forget or even forgive if you don’t want to! But, ah… there’s got to be a difference between totally swallowing your anger and cutting ties forever, right?” Shang Qinghua says awkwardly. “If there’s… ever going to be anything good afterwards…”

Shen Qingqiu stares at him for a sweat-inducing length of time.

 “Ah, fuck,” Shang Qinghua thinks.

“Sorry,” he says. “Ahhh, I’m just… thinking about something someone told me… in… in regards to some of my own problems. Never mind! Never mind!”

- 

AN: Luo Jiahui really is out here making Moshang and Qijiu get their fucking act together just by setting a better example. 

- 

“Shizun, my apologies for the interruption, but I came to ask Shizun if he would be willing to join our music lesson today? The disciples have missed his playing and are eager to present their improvements.”

“...Very well, unless anyone here would disagree…?” Shen Qingqiu looks directly at the Qian Cao Peak cultivator, as though daring her to object and die.

“It’s an excellent suggestion!” the Qian Cao Peak cultivator says quickly.

The young woman smiles. “And perhaps Shizun could sit in on the calligraphy lesson afterwards? In order to offer his opinion on my progress as a teacher?”

“Fishing for compliments is unbecoming,” Shen Qingqiu says dryly.

“Wait, what?” Shang Qinghua thinks.

- 

AN: So, this has all been happening in the background, but Shen Qingqiu accepted this House of Rejuvenation woman onto his Peak about... 6-ish years ago now? This is kind of meant to parallel Shang Qinghua’s once-secret relationship with Luo Jiahui. 

Shang Qinghua was out here trying to be a better person and Shen Qingqiu noticed; now Shen Qingqiu has his own positive (platonic) relationship with a nameless background character who was meant to die for plot reasons. What a thing, huh? If the story was saved because Shang Qinghua started a domino effect of saving random people who went on to change things? 

- 

After all, as Shang Qinghua said to the kid, besides Peerless Cucumber’s apparent talent for cultivation, he knows that his fellow transmigrator has three very important skills that will serve him well on An Ding Peak! 1) An encyclopedia knowledge for even seemingly pointless bullshit (which is kind of flattering, honestly). 2) The willingness to fight total strangers over seemingly pointless bullshit. And 3) a sharp enough tongue to win.

Peerless Cucumber didn’t find these points as funny as Shang Qinghua did.

- 

AN: Shen Yuan was always going to end up on An Ding Peak. I thought about sending him to Qing Jing or Qian Cao or Qiong Ding... or any other Peak... but that would take him too far away from Shang Qinghua to really explore their relationship and to move him around conveniently in the story. And SY sticking to An Ding seemed to best illustrate the fact that SY is lost and doesn’t know what to do except cling to SQH. 

- 

“It’s not much, sure, but it’s yours,” Shang Qinghua says finally. “You’ll be joining the talisman classes soon, so don’t try anything from a book and then need to request some home repairs.”

Peerless Cucumber nods and puts his stack of manuals down on the table.

“How’s your tutorial mission going?”

“Fine,” the kid says shortly. “Have you found anything for the other one yet?”

“Ah, not yet.”

- 

AN: “Are you winning, son?” meme energy here. 

- 

Ah, now Shang Qinghua recognizes his fellow transmigrator’s expression! That’s the same stunned expression one of his Huan Hua not-disciples, Yu Chaonan, made upon meeting the Bai Zhan Peak War God for the first time. Shang Qinghua assumes that Peerless Cucumber was expecting a man who looked more like a musclebound giant and less like a pop idol (if one with amazingly muscular arms), which is a super common and never-not-funny misconception people have about Liu Qingge.  

“Brother of one of the most beautiful women in this world, bro,” Shang Qinghua reminds his fellow transmigrator, amused. Aha! Now Peerless Cucumber’s vehement disinterest in the harem stuff is making even more sense than before!

Shang Qinghua’s assumption gets 100% confirmed when it comes time for Peerless Cucumber to fly with Liu Qingge for the next leg of the journey. The other transmigrator is so embarrassed and awkward about it that Shang Qinghua’s super direct brother-in-law asks if the young man is alright.

- 

AN: This was so fun to write. Shang Qinghua really can use the Liu siblings to gauge people’s sexual/romantic orientation. 

- 

The map (or rather, the copy Shang Qinghua made of the delicate original map) takes them to a green and grey landscape of leafy trees crawling over a wide network of tall cliffs and deep gorges. Gurgling rivers cut through twisting rock formations. Shang Qinghua can’t see any of these rivers on the map. Or these deathly drop ravines. From the outside, the whole thing looks like a natural maze (holy shit, there could be so many monsters and death-traps in there!), and Shang Qinghua would know those golden robes flying low over the hanging trees anywhere.

“Huan Hua,” Liu Qingge mutters.

“Do you think they’re looking for what we’re looking for?” Luo Fanli asks.

“That’s usually how it goes,” Peerless Cucumber says, before Shang Qinghua can.

- 

AN: I came up with the skeleton idea first. Then I was like... “I should give it three eyes.” And then I was like... “But who IS this dead author? A god? A spirit? What grander implications am I spinning here?” 

And THEN I remembered that I had some ambiguous powerful being force the Garden Master into exile due to a flood. This was because, in the Epic of Gilgamesh, the immortal man Gilgamesh meets in the abyss is the survivor of a great flood. So I was like, “Reduce! Re-use! Recycle! There’s my skeleton!” 

So I wanted to relate the skeleton to water because of the flood angle. Water as a symbol of cleansing/reincarnation is a big thing throughout many cultures. I can’t remember exactly how the crying aspect came up, but I knew there was going to be water in the temple now, so at some point my brain like was, “Bro, this skeleton should totally be crying because mythology vibes.” 

So I built the surrounding land off the idea that there was water flowing from or around this temple. At this point, I had decided that Huan Hua Palace should also be looking for this artifact, so I had to come up with a way to hide the temple, yet have a way for SQH’s party to track it down. 

- 

The damage to the doors is worse: someone once upon a time collapsed a part of the cliff face around the entrance, essentially leaving only the top fourth of the utterly smashed stone doors visible. It’s a wall now and has been for ages. It looks like it would take days to dig through the rubble. Someone has even super helpfully carved, “These doors will never open again,” just above the wreck.

“Guess we’ll have to go in as intruders rather than guests!” Luo Fanli says.

“What would be welcoming us inside a lost temple exactly?” Shang Qinghua asks vaguely, inwardly cursing the fact that explosive mining techniques will definitely attract the Huan Hua Palace Sect cultivators’ attention and also probably collapse the whole cliff on them.

“We only have to clear a passage for us, not the whole door,” Peerless Cucumber says optimistically. “Is there a special technique for this kind of thing?”

“Aha, not really.”

“Oh.”

“Why don’t we just keep following the water?” Luo Fanli says.

“...How so?” Shang Qinghua asks.

“Some of those waterfalls could be passages inside,” Liu Qingge explains, because he and the little sister-in-law apparently share the same brain. He’s already eyeing the waterfall wearing down the giant statue on the left.

- 

AN: Temples in quests need to have traps and obstacles and monsters! Well, not ALL of the did, but this one did. I based the obstacles they faced as much as I could around the whole “Death of the Author” theme, while using this whole quest to explore Shen Yuan, Shen Yuan and Shang Qinghua, Shang Qinghua and Liu Qingge and Luo Fanli, and so on. 

The idea here with the door is that the “author” is not going to let them inside the temple to take the interpretation of the narrative (the Eye) for themselves. The story is over (the temple is closed for business)! The author is dead! If they want to get inside, they have to break inside or slip inside as intruders. 

This also creates a convenient obstacle to hold up the Huan Hua Palace Sect cultivators so that our party can be nearly caught later! And shows off Shang Qinghua, Liu Qingge, and Luo Fanli’s twisty lines of thinking. 

- 

Luo Fanli is holding the light and Shang Qinghua passes the other transmigrator to her, while accepting Liu Qingge’s hand for help getting out of the water.

“Ahhh, that was fun,” Shang Qinghua mutters.

Then he notices that Liu Qingge has the Cheng Luan sword out and ready. Shang Qinghua looks through the surrounding darkness, but all he can see are columns and water. For a moment, he thinks he sees something, a prowling shadow at the other end of the cavernous room, but he wipes the water out of his eyes and it’s gone.

- 

AN: The water in Shang Qinghua’s eyes briefly lets him see a flash of the invisible monsters who show up later! It helps up the tension. 

- 

Another low growl rips through the darkness and Peerless Cucumber shuffles a little closer to Shang Qinghua. Because that sounded really fucking close and yet Shang Qinghua still can’t see the thing that’s making that sound.

He doesn’t see Liu Qingge lunge at him either. He only feels his brother-in-law shove him into Peerless Cucumber, knocking them into the water, out of the way of something that howls when Liu Qingge slashes at it with his sword. Shang Qinghua rolls off Peerless Cucumber and looks up just in time to see dark blood splatter across the watery floor. Liu Qingge pursues the attacker with a second slash, but only seems to meet thin air this time.

“It’s invisible!” Luo Fanli cries. “Fuck!”

“Behind you!” Liu Qingge snaps, and spins to slash at the thin air beside him. Dark droplets of blood hit the water again and something hisses at him.

Luo Fanli whirls and slashes, searching for an opponent.

“They’re reflected in the water!” Liu Qingge yells at her, standing guard over Shang Qinghua as he gets to his feet again. “Listen for their footsteps and vocalizations! Feel the demonic energy and air displacement!”

- 

AN: I got this from a list of Dungeons and Dragons puzzles. The idea is that there’s some puzzle that must be solved, but the truth of the room can only be seen in the reflection of the nearby water (or mirror or whatever). 

Which felt fitting for a “Death of the Author” quest! Whatever an author’s intentions, the story is what they actually wrote, so the audience interprets a text without the context of the author’s insight. The truth (of the story) is in the reflection (audience interpretation)! It felt like a fun idea. 

It also allows Shen Yuan to actually contribute to the quest via monster lore and bring up his impaired vision problem. And to confront Shen Yuan with the reality of this world. And to show off Luo Fanli’s fighting skills. And to show off LIU QINGGE’S legendary fighting skills, instincts as a warrior who fights many dangerous beasts, and the fact that he’s clever and observant! 

Liu Qingge is good at what he does! And this is what he does! 

- 

Someone has… angrily… or desperately… carved a lopsided message into the wall.

 “‘If I go blind, so does the world,’” Peerless Cucumber reads.

“...That’s probably not good,” Shang Qinghua says.

“Nooo…” Fanli agrees.

The messages continue as they climb, carved into the walls, the ceilings, the floors. Most of it is illegible. Some of it is just nonsense. Some of it looks like the same kind of historical records carved into the broken tablets. Some of it looks like someone attacked the walls after reading what was written there. There are deep gouges in the walls and cracked marks that would match a giant’s hands.

 “‘The water cleans the lies,’” Peerless Cucumber reads. “‘I am the only one who can see.’ ‘Lies everywhere, lies everywhere, lies everywhere.’ ‘The water cleans the evil.’ ‘I do not have enough tears.’ ‘Everything is nothing now. Everything in vain.’”

“You really don’t need to read them!” Shang Qinghua tells the kid. “It’s fine. It's totally fine.”

- 

AN: This is mostly here to up the tension, but it’s also here to try and give insight into this being and relate them more to the “Death of the Author” and the “Seeing is Believing” themes. 

I also saw the phrase “If I go blind, so does the world” while I was browsing a list of riddles for D&D campaigns and I was like, “THAT’S SICK, I’M USING THAT.” Really brings the “an eye for an eye” and vengeance vibes. (The riddle was longer than that one phrase, but the answer was “the sun”.) 

- 

The top of the temple reveals one massive room that looks like someone was alternatively scratching their insanity into the walls and tearing chunks out of the interior design with their bare hands. Overtop of the rubble is that eerie overgrowth. There’s a fine layer of water over the floor. At the center of it all is an incredibly enormous desk, cracked in half, with a robed skeleton sitting behind it, slumped over the top. It’s a little too large to be an ordinary human.

Plus, its skull is a little too long, probably to accommodate the third eye socket in the forehead. There’s something gleaming softly yellow in the third eye socket.

“Is… there water dripping from its eyes?” Luo Fanli whispers.

“It looks like it…” Peerless Cucumber whispers back. “Like it's crying…?”

“Still…? Is it dead or not?”

 “Holy shit,” Shang Qinghua thinks, slightly nauseated. “System, bro, the worst bro I’ve ever known, tell me that we have not been swimming in a three-eyed skeleton’s magical undead tears or something this whole time.”

The shitty, no-good System stays unsurprisingly silent. 

- 

AN: Okay, so the idea here is that this being was someone who recorded history and shared their knowledge freely. This being had the ability to discern the truth of a person - they were extremely perceptive. (The Weeper is either female or doesn’t have a gender, by the way.) 

The Weeper met the Garden Master at some point. The Garden Master was an asshole, a liar, arrogant, etc.. The Weeper and the Garden Master clashed badly, until the Weeper sent the cleansing flood that nearly destroyed the sect and the Garden Master essentially had to flee to a personal abyss. 

The Garden Master sent the plant as a final “fuck you” to the Weeper. The plant caused the Weeper to slowly go mad. The smashed tablets and destroyed temple are the Weeper’s work. The Weeper (not in a great state of mind) had the temple closed themselves once they realized they and their work had been corrupted. This was a “you destroy my (embellished) reputation, I destroy yours (and your entire life)” plot by the Garden Master. 

The idea behind the tears is the whole “water is cleansing” thing. The Weeper tried to clean away the madness using their magical water-related abilities... and it actually worked for a long time. But eventually the madness began to overpower the effects of the magical water. The Weeper’s tears are from frustration and helplessness at losing control. 

The water inside the temple combats the plant’s physical effects. Also stabbing the root killed the plant and essentially broke its mental/spiritual powers. 

- 

Unfortunately, to get the fuck out of here, they have to go back through the temple. But hey! That’s still a lot better than an extended hike through an underground, haunted desert in darkness! The battle with the now-dead plant caused its growth to writhe around the temple. The vines need to be hacked through sometimes as they travel down through the rooms of broken shelves and shattered tablets.

“So much history lost…” Peerless Cucumber murmurs.

 “He still thinks of himself as a reader - an observer, a visitor, separate from the flow of fate.”

- 

AN: This is... absolutely based on the Heart from the Dishonored franchise. But this sort of item didn’t originate with Dishonored and I need it! It’s a surprise/mystery tool that will help us later! 

The Eye isn’t exactly a mind-reading object. I mean, it kind of is, but it works in a very specific way that I’m looking forward to getting into. 

- 

From there, their path back out of the natural maze is even more careful and stressful than before, now that the Huan Hua Palace Sect cultivators are actively looking for them rather than the temple. It’s slow-going and stressful and silent, except for when the Weeper’s Eye presses too close against his chest.

 “He is afraid that if he starts screaming, he will never stop,” it tells him, when he’s looking at a pale-faced Peerless Cucumber, as they fly over a particularly deathly-looking drop.

 “Oh, me too, bro!” Shang Qinghua thinks. “Seriously! Tell me something I don’t know!”

- 

AN: Having Shang Qinghua be totally unimpressed by an object like this was very funny to me. He’s the author! He’s a transmigrator! He knows these people well! He already has insight into their situations. 

- 

Shang Qinghua groans, but supposes that Peerless Cucumber would have at least been disguising Liu Qingge from the back. “You tell them that you were tracking thieves who stole something from Cang Qiong Mountain Sect,” he says quickly. “Rule of embarrassment! Admitting something that makes us look bad to a rival makes it sound true. Don’t tell them what was stolen and act really offended if they try to poke into Cang Qiong business. I’ll come back as soon as I get these two out!”

Liu Qingge nods and launches forward into the fight.

“We’re just leaving him?” Peerless Cucumber says, as they do exactly that.

“I’ll get changed and come back ‘looking for him for urgent sect business’ as soon as I’ve dropped you two off in the last town,” Shang Qinghua says. “I’m really good at acting stressed and confused, and at desperately needing an unstoppable wandering Liu Qingge back at Cang Qiong Mountain Sect immediately. Now let’s go! Let’s go! Mission isn’t over yet!”

- 

AN: Shang Qinghua is, at heart, a liar. I love him. 

[docholligay]

Hi Doc! I'm looking to buy a nice wine to celebrate with tonight and I've got about $100 set aside for it. Is that enough to buy a good wine with, or should I splurge a little more? I'm not necessarily looking for a high alcohol content, but I'm not afraid of that either; I'm looking for something that tastes lovely and goes well with fish. Do you have any recommendations?

Wine Anon: Ok so I consulted my co-celebrator and here are some answers!

I thought we were doing a fancy dinner but we're getting a bunch of sushi with some appetizers (edamame, maybe some oysters.) We aren't doing dessert with dinner tonight. We are eventually going to do a 3 course dinner with dessert, and we will be getting several bottles so I'll def have to come back to you for that!

I'm very new to wine, I know that I like rosé and some sweet whites? The last white that I got that I liked was a pear wine from Olive Garden (I know, I am the Haruka of my relationship.) It was actually the wine that convinced me to not give up on trying new wines! I think I'd only had a few up until then and they were dreadful. I think I don't like dry?

Wine comments from my so: dry, woody, not sweet, not leggy, anything he can taste the tannins in is a no-go so no reds? He favors white but he won't say no to a good rosé. His first wine love was a 5y Sauvignon Blanc he had at a some fancy rich dude's party when he was 17 so he can't recall the name haha. He mentioned New Zealand and Chilean wines were good.

If it comes down to it, I don't mind getting a good bottle heavily favoring his tastes (we're doing this for him) but if you can think of 2 bottles that we'd both separately like, I wouldn't mind that either.

Thank you so much for your help!

First of all, congrats to your mancandy for knowing the difference between tannic and dry. There's a huge misconception that dry means tannic, and they're totally different things. I assume it's because tannins have a sort of dryish feel in the mouth. Anyhow, I DO want to argue the fact that reds are exclusively tannic--there are plenty of low tannin reds--but that's another post, as red wouldn't really go with what you were eating unless we were really trying to make it stretch.

Secondly, all of this assumes that you have no interest whatsoever in sake. I LOVE sake, and it's my always go to for sushi, and my frequent go-to for light fish dishes in general. But it's not super accessible, and some (wrong) people flat do not like it.

Thirdly THANK YOU SO MUCH for just giving me a goddamn number!! My least favorite word on EARTH is "affordable." It's meaningless. Just tell me your number! I may not be able to HELP you, but I won't JUDGE you. For anything you need help finding. So bless you, and it was a MAJOR reason I decided to answer this. Whites tend to be cheaper (unless they are Champagne) for a wide variety of reasons, so I don’t think MUCH on this list will hit about 35-40. 

A note: Unless something is WIDELY available commercially, I just recommend TYPES of wine. I would go into your local wine store and ask for these varietals, depending on which one you choose. They may even be able to help select one to go with fish!

So for him, I DO recommend a Sauvignon Blanc, or another high acid wine. The fish used in sushi is mostly fatty and rich, for fish, and these high acid wines give a real element of freshness and even slightly of salt.

You want to know one of my favorite SBs? It's actually something you can get at the goddamn COSTCO, Kim Crawford SB. I don't know if I would call it an OCCASION wine, depending on how we think of things, but it is special enough to be a Shabbat wine in my family, I think you can get it in most grocery stores, and it never disappoints.

If you want SB, but not though, I'd go with a Fume Blanc, which is one of my favorite wines no one seems to know. Fume Blanc is SB, honestly, but made in the US, and pretty much always highly oaky and dry. I love it, but I love that oak shit. Fume Blanc is hard to find nowadays, because of declining knowledge of the name, winemakers are just labeling stuff " Sauvignon Blanc" which, yeah, it's the same grape, but I like to know which SBs have seen some oak, you know? Anyway, I like the rich oakiness paired with salmon rolls especially!

If you want to go with something TOTALLY different that I think he'd like, I think that a Muscadet is going to have a lot of those same flavors while giving him something different. It's BONE DRY, and the acids from it are going to give a lot of those same pleasant associations as SB. A good Muscadet is probably the most expensive thing on this list. 

My favorite budget sushi wine, period, is Ovum Big Salt. You are not looking for budget wine, but if you ever are like me and eating buy one get one half off rolls while reading a book, I love Big Salt. It's a Riesling-Gewurztraminer (Somehow I doubt I spelt that second one correctly) blend that legitimately has strong salt overtones. It's also great with coconut shrimp. (Come to think of it, dry Riesling would be a good pairing with this, too)

For you!

Sweeter wines are tougher to pair with sushi than his tastes, but that shouldn't say at all that it's impossible! If you like something labeled pear wine at the Olive Garden (ahahahaha I'm sorry but ahahaha) the wines you like are probably not just sweet in a WINE sense, but probably TRULY sweet.

So I'm going to push you a little bit! These are sweet in the wine category, or if you’re the sort of person who doesn’t eat a lot of sugar, but they aren’t like...fucking moscato or something. A bit more refined, a bit more elegant, and a good way to move into developing your palate, while not being OVERTLY challenging for a newbie. 

My wife is at times (often) a Haruka Lite, just one calorie, and moving her to a better and wider palate, I’ve had a lot of luck with bubbles. I think because they are widely fun in their own right, and give another quality to what might otherwise be a too-straight-on glass of wine, so that’s the direction I went here.

Prosecco, specifically a demi-sec. Demi-sec is the sweetest variety of prosecco, and I confess I give this to you more to try and put you on the path of expanding your wine palate than as a specific pairing--like I said, sweets are hard--and you’ll almost certainly need to go to a wine shop to find a version that is both demi-sec and GOOD, which is doable but not easily accessible*.

Now if you want something I ACTUALLY think goes with sushi, I recommend Cremant. Cremant is champagne, made in France, not made IN Champagne. It’s the same shit. It offers a lot of the complexity and delight of Champagne without the cost (Champagne is ALSO a lovely choice! But I generally recommend that if you’re both drinking the same bottle.) I think it’s one of the greatest secrets of the wine world--it’s not like the French terroir outside of Champagne sucks. You will almost certainly have to get this in a wine shop, as it’s not well known by people casually (which is a goddamn shame) in America--the UK tends to have a wider range of them.

I L O V E Cremant. Love. A favorite bubbly. Maybe my favorite, actually? I mean I love Chapagne but like, I have a baby and a mortgage and a budget.  And Champagne goes great with sushi! Cremant is, I find, a little less intense than Champagne, which I think will be really good for you as a “beginner” and also the price point tends to be SO APPROACHABLE. Anyway on this one I actually DO have a couple brand recs, because this a thing I drink A LOT, and I’m going to break my ruling about not reccing certain brands ahaha. 

J. Laurens Cremant de Limoux --I think this bottle is like 20 bucks locally? It IS more Brut (dry) but I still think it’s really nice, with a citrusy quality that pairs really good with richer fish

Kuentz-Bas Cremant d'Alsace-- I fucking love this bottle. It’s 25, I think, bucks, at my local wine shop. It’s almost...creamy? I know that sounds insane but I can’t think of a better word. I love Alsatian wine in general though. This is a really nice, light wine that I think pairs with TONS of stuff, and would be good with a wide variety of sushi styles. 

I had a really amazing Rosé Cremant years ago that had a quality of sweetness to it, but I bought it in a goddamn Tesco in London and so I DOUBT you can find it here. I have it written down in my travel journal though, I think. 

ANYWAY I HOPE THIS HELPS SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG. 

*This puts me in mind of the One Good Moscato I have ever had, at Alinea (in and of it itself one of the highlights of my life) where it was still too sweet for me personally, but I could recognize the complexity and mastery in the glass. I was shit shocked. Someone remind me to ask @keyofjetwolf what it was, I think she wrote it down, and as I recall it was not a spendy bottle, even. 

[gettin-bi-bi-bi]

I wanna know if if other girls/wlw felt this way, but I'm always a bit guilty about touching female friends platonically. I'm always stressed about their reaction and if they think I'm hitting on them or not, and honestly this even gets to a point where I cannot flirt or have intimate relationships, I'm just so self-consicous! I wanted to know if you had advice on how to overcome it, I've been out and in queer positive spaces for years now, I'm doing better but not so great inside. Thank you!!!

Well, personally I cannot ralate to this, maybe because I’m a very touchy person anyway with everyone whether I’m genuinely attracted to them or not AND I joke-flirt with friends a lot, too. That’s kinda the vibe I have with a lot of people of all genders. So that’s just as a disclaimer to let you know that I cannot give any advice from personal experience.

But to answer your question if other wlw experience the same: yes, absolutely, that is something I have heard/read a lot. It seems to be a common fear amongst wlw that their female friends will assume any show of platonic affection is actually meant in a romantic/sexual way. I guess there is two aspects to look at:

1) how your friends might react: if someone automatically assumed that you being queer means you must be attracted to them, that’s an aspect of the oversexualisation of queer people (wlw in particular). it’s not your fault if someone else has that misconception and more or less wilfully misinterpretes your behaviour. if you being friendly and showing platonic affection causes someone to jump right to screaming “no homo” that is them overreacting!!!

2) your fear of their possible reaction: You seem to have internalised a lot of this stuff because of the above mentioned misconceptions and oversexualisation. I guess that deep down you know this all is bollocks but internalised queerphobia is a bitch that’s very hard to break out of.

I can direct you to my generic “how to get rid of internalised biphobia” post here but I’m not sure it’ll fit your specific situation perfectly.

To be honest, I think a good approach (especially since you say you are out) is to just openly talk about these worries with people. And by that I both mean your queer friends and your non-queer friends. And both the friends that you worry might misinterpret your behaviour as romantic/sexual and those that you don’t have those worries about. Just get it out there and off the table. I’d take the wild guess that most of your friends probably don’t misinterpret your behaviour at all and know that you are 100% just platonically interested in them. But it can also help to get that reassurance. So break the ice and say something like “man, have you ever had that thing where you’re so afraid someone might misinterpret your platonic touches as something else? I feel like I have to constantly police what I do bc I don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable.” I’m sure some of your queer friends know the feeling. And even your non-queer ones might be able to relate or be like “no idea what you’re talking about but don’t worry, I don’t feel like you’re hitting on me, friend!”

I’m sure when you try to be rational about it you know that hugging a friend is a very normal thing that friends do and doesn’t equal “hitting on someone”. Remind yourself of that and maybe try to reverse the conceptin your head - if a friend casually touches you in a friendly/platonic way, would you think they are hitting on you? Probably not. You’d know they are just doing a friend-thing.

Maddie

[lowkeyed1]

was talking with a friend recently who is trans and 21 and hooboy does she have some dumbbad opinions about queer stuff. it started out with her feeling that cis women shouldn't be doing drag because they're gentrifying it and i was like okay counterpoint it's not really gentrifying bc it's not like they're taking things away or overrunning drag and they have to work pretty hard to get established in their locales and taken seriously. so she went on to talk about how it's annoying that there aren't any queer-only spaces and that allies are annoying and how kids today just pretend to be gay for attention because they think it's cool. and i was like well, it's great you had yourself figured out so young but some people take more time, and i don't see how you can say whether someone isn't really gay or not, and straight people don't usually question themselves at all, and sometimes after a while allies realize that they feel so passionate about it for a whole other reason. and then i was like sidebar, when i was first coming out a lot of gay people didn't think bi people were gay enough and were just tourists who could run away and pass whenever they wanted, and if they were in opposite gender relationships they were completely invalid... ....at the same time she posted how she didn't do the gay group in her high school bc it was '3 gay people and a bunch of maybe 1% bisexuals' and i was like okay maybe this isn't as much of a sidebar after all lol. so i just reiterated that for some people it's a long process to figure themselves out, and it's not good to try and police who's queer enough because you can drive people back into trying to repress themselves. and i shared my experience around that with gender and my long process, and i shared how hurtful it is to be told you're not queer enough and how much it makes you question yourself. and i hope that's food for thought for her. like, what she said brought up a lot of hurtful stuff for me but i also remember having very baddumb opinions about stuff at her age -- for example, i was 100% supportive of trans people as a concept (didn't know any that i was aware of, then), EXCEPT i didn't get gender affirming surgery at all. i thought that trans people should just accept that they are different and still be themselves, and not have surgeries that might damage their sexual function just to fit in with a bullshit socially constructed gender binary. and it took someone gently pointing out that maybe my head was up my ass for me to really think harder about it and actually listen to what trans people have to say about it and how much psychological distress it can relieve and improve lives for me to be like oh i've been a dumbass. also i learned a lot more about how gender affirming surgery actually works that cleared up my misconceptions about it. and i also learned more about how just because i feel a certain not-a-firm-gender kind of way doesn't mean everyone else does and just doesn't realize it bc of conditioning. so please know that you're not going to get everything right the first time in your life, lol. i've had a lot of firm opinions that turned out to be based on not enough information, experience, or empathy and completely changed my mind. that is okay for you to do too! don't get so invested in having to have been right the first time that you keep propping up a bad opinion, it's okay to be wrong and move forward in a better direction. anyway i think she feels uncertain of where she belongs and how to connect with people, so she's turned that energy into territoriality about who belongs on her turf but hooboy... is that ever unproductive. and hurtful, too. i understand she is struggling so hard right now, and i have a feeling she might be preemptively dismissing people she could form great bonds with because they're not passing some litmus test for her. so i hope that she heard something i said and it might grow a little thought to try and think about it all a little differently.

[danwhobrowses]

Why Tashigi Deserves More Respect

I really gotta remember these other things I plan on writing XD Often I get reminded though by people around me criticizing something I realise ‘that’s a little misunderstood’ and then get compelled to write about it. For today we’re looking at the female Marine of One Piece, Tashigi. Now before we start, I want to make a point that Tashigi is still an underused character brimming with potential that Oda seems to shy a lot from. Oda can still sincerely do a lot more with her and I for one have been disappointed by her lack of use in Stampede and lack of appearance in Wano. However, I get a lot of people who feel that Tashigi is ‘useless’, and I’m going to say that this isn’t really the case.

Argument 1: Her Battles

Of course, a lot of strength regarding a character comes with their ability to come out victorious. It can harm any character in a show to constantly be on the losing side of a fight and it does hurt Tashigi (and Smoker) a lot that they do end up that way. While I would love Tashigi to have her first clean win since those guys in Loguetown I’d like to remind you that Tashigi’s fights do have a bit of defense to them, let’s look at all of Tashigi’s named opponents

Zoro (Loguetown) - We always knew that Zoro was winning this, while she was bested by Zoro the purpose of the story wasn’t ever going to be Tashigi being stronger, instead this was Zoro having to confront her similarities with Kuina in personality rather than skill.

Nico Robin/Miss All Sunday (Alabasta) - While Tashigi was unable to even strike Robin back in Alabasta, Robin’s devil fruit allowed her to be perfect for such a situation. A trained and deadly assassin, Tashigi’s physical confrontation was never going to succeed, but what was key to this battle was Tashigi’s realization in regards to the failure of Justice. In the end she had to rely on Luffy to defeat the Pirates the WG had assigned to maintain the balance.

Luffy (Marineford/Punk Hazard) - Luffy and Tashigi briefly crossed paths in Marineford, Luffy swiftly dodged her but again, Tashigi was never going to defeat Luffy and was merely a doorway to put Smoker and Luffy into a fight. It’s also worth reminding that Tashigi must’ve been capable enough to hold her own against Whitebeard’s lesser forces, since she was uninjured from Marineford. They also crossed at Punk Hazard, but then they were both weakened by being in unfamiliar bodies, something which Luffy even acknowledges.

Trafalgar Law (Punk Hazard) - as pictured above, Tashigi’s defeat to Law was another gateway for Smoker to enter the fight, but this one had more purpose in showing Tashigi’s willpower, which we will get to. As you can tell, there’s a theme: Tashigi would never have beaten Law in terms of the narrative, why do we hold it against Tashigi that she lost to the guy who later did this?

Ceasar Clown (Punk Hazard) - while listed as a fight, she fell the same way as Robin and Franky due to his DF being unrevealed, again this being a gateway to sell that Ceasar had a danger to him, I wouldn’t actually count it as a fight.

Vergo (Punk Hazard) - the Donquixote spy is one of Doflamingo’s deadliest subordinates. The original Corazon, Tashigi’s conflict with Vergo brought Sanji into the fight and once again highlighted to Tashigi the corruption within the Marines themselves. Like Law (and the next), we can’t be too harsh on Tashigi losing to Vergo, the guy easily fended off Sanji to the point of almost breaking Sanji’s leg, he also was able to beat Smoker

Monet (Punk Hazard) - Monet is a mixed one, because Zoro quickly defeats her she was quickly overshadowed by the fact that she struggled to even get on the offensive, broadening the gap between them. But, I’d like to remind everyone that Monet was able to force Luffy into fleeing their battle and was handling Robin, Nami and Chopper at once. Tashigi hadn’t completely lost either, I would bet that she’d fight without an arm, maybe not successfully but she would, and she got the finishing blow on Monet - her second offensive attack against Monet put her away and while technically this doesn’t count as a W for Tashigi she did not technically lose in this fight either

As you can see, while it’s easy to say that ‘Tashigi never wins her fights, so she’s weak’ it really undermines the opposition she willingly puts herself against. Narratively there’d be no reason for Tashigi to win these fights, doing so would lead to confusion and disbelief (for instance, would you have seen Luffy beating Kaido solo back in Bakura Town? No, obviously). Tashigi is still strong, she’s able to survive the Grand Line, easily deflect cannon fire with her sword and use Haki, the latter cannot be said for Main Characters like Nami, Chopper, Franky, Carrot and somehow Robin (like girl you spent 2 years with the Revolutionaries, where’s your Haki?). While we would love a win to validate this, Oda always puts her against an opponent that would be difficult for her to win against, and we thus mistake her inability to win as weakness. So that leads to another argument. Argument 2: Tashigi always punches above her weight While this is very much true, One Piece has often told us that being the strongest doesn’t always mean that you will win. Consider 90% of Nami and Usopp’s wins, Luffy’s wins over Crocodile, Enel, Lucci, Magellan, Cracker and Katakuri, the weak may not be able to choose how they die but that doesn’t mean that the strong can either.  I’d also like to argue that Tashigi’s motive on fighting strong opponents is not because she feels that she is stronger, she fights them because they are the enemy that needs to be stopped, her motives are pure in her pursuit of justice just as the Straw Hats fight stronger opponents because it fulfills a just cause such as saving Alabasta, their crewmates, people who had their shadows stolen, Camie, Fishman Island, the Punk Hazard children, Dressrosa, Zou or Wano. Tashigi really gets criticized for it because it doesn’t yield the results it does for major characters, often needing help to get the victory. In that I wanna point out a harsh truth as well; Goku - the people many anime fans will compare power scales against - almost never beats the main villain on his own in DBZ or DBS. Freeza - required damage from Krillin, Gohan, Vegeta and Piccolo before the win, and he didn’t finish him off, Cell - tags out to Gohan, who also needs Vegeta’s help to win, Buu - needs Vegeta’s help via fusion and a full power recharge by the Dragon Balls, Beerus - he lost, Golden Freeza - he got jumped by Sorbet and needed Whis’ rewind, Hit - he gave up, Fused Zamasu - lost, and needed Zeno to wipe him out, Jiren - needed Freeza and 17′s help and Vegeta’s energy and finally Broly - needed fusion. So maybe, if even Son Goku cannot win on his own, we can cut Tashigi a little bit of slack given that she’s not even a main character.

Argument 3: ‘She does nothing’ I don’t really like this insinuation. Often Smoker and Tashigi are the ones that pick up the mess after all the enemies are defeated, but for some reason that equates to ‘doing nothing’. I think because people see Tashigi as interchangeable with any other character she is thus useless because she is not mandatory. However, Tashigi’s role is much more complex than that.

Even if she’s not strong enough to fight the biggest fishes in the pond, she still manages to grow and prove her worth. If Tashigi was replaced with any generic marine captain a lot of what happened would be different. It was Tashigi who identified Wado Ichimonji and Sandai Kitetsu for Zoro, Tashigi who (albeit reluctantly) directed Luffy to Crocodile, Tashigi who kept the Straw Hats safe from arrest in Alabasta, Tashigi who convinced Smoker that he needed to swallow his pride and side with Law and Luffy to stop Ceasar and it was Tashigi who convinced Nami to entrust the Punk Hazard children to them. Through her experiences she also cultivates her own unique sense of Justice. While she follows Smoker’s doctrine of ‘A Pirate will always be a Pirate’ and that the Shichibukai system and the World Government as a whole is flawed, she has also learned for herself that there are times that pride must be set aside, in a way Tashigi’s sense of Justice has become a combination of Smoker’s and Fujitora’s: in order to rebuild justice, the navy itself must become strong enough to not depend on pirates, but pride cannot supersede the greater good. In addition, implying she does nothing also implies that she doesn’t practice her own sense of justice either. She stepped in on Zoro twice to protect her men from harm, before even arriving at Punk Hazard we learned that she had a good relationship with the parents who had their children kidnapped as they asked specifically for her which in turn led her to personally strive to reunite the children with their parents and she even protected the truth of Vergo from G-5 so that they didn’t feel betrayed and demoralized. Of the things Tashigi does, nothing is not one of them, she displays compassion, fairness and determination in definitive moments. Argument 3: She’s too hung up on her Feminism

So, one of the major dynamics of Tashigi and Zoro is her misconception that Zoro wouldn’t cut her because she was a woman, a belief that women have to prove themselves more to be seen as strong against men being one of the beliefs she shares with Zoro’s childhood rival Kuina. While it can be a tad irksome that she’d hang onto this with Zoro, until Monet Zoro never actually demonstrated the contrary to her. This is mainly a complaint by hindsight, we only dislike the opinion because we’ve seen Zoro more than Tashigi has, and she’s not 100% wrong, Zoro himself has been a bit of a traditionalist, in Skypeia he angrily chastised Enel for attacking Robin since she was a woman, and he only does step in on Monet to save Tashigi - not even finishing her off despite being very capable of doing so. Outside of Zoro, Tashigi’s feelings that she gets treated differently due to her gender is proven and reflected in how G-5 treat her with little authority, only really listening to her because she’s pretty. You can’t be too hard on Tashigi given that she is constantly faced with this truth on a daily basis, and her desire to be seen for her strength and skills are still an amicable one, it’s worth noting that even Law recognized that her mentality and warrior’s spirit was far greater than he swordsmanship, but he only thought this internally. In Tashigi’s case it would help her confidence to be given validation, and not in the condescending way Zoro usually talks to people.  While it can be annoying that she immediately thinks that she’s being treated differently because she’s a woman, this also shows that she wants to be treated as an equal; if she is defeated in combat she wants to be cut to preserve her honour, it is the mentality all Great Samurai have, including Zoro. Oda does something with Tashigi he rarely does with any woman in One Piece in making her less sexualised and body-confident to reflect her goal of being recognized by her spirit and actions rather than her appearance, but he also makes that complex for the character which in a way this is most important for.

Argument 4: She’s not a good Rival for Zoro

I think one of the biggest misconceptions about Tashigi’s character is that she is meant to be Zoro’s rival, in a similar manner to how Smoker and Luffy are embroiled in a Garp/Roger-esque cat and mouse chase. Because of this, people expect Tashigi to advance at a similar scale to Zoro to keep him on his toes, to make sure that he doesn’t end up complacent in his strive to become the World’s Greatest Swordsman. Her former likeness to Kuina also adds to this misconception, since because Kuina was Zoro’s rival with the same goal and always stronger than Zoro himself, Tashigi must be similar.

But this is not why Tashigi and Zoro are always put together. Tashigi is not Zoro’s rival, no other character we’ve met has the same goal as Zoro, and this keeps his story free to develop with different challenges. Tashigi’s pursuit of strength is not for the same reasons as Zoro, she doesn’t want to be the World’s Greatest Swordsperson, she only wants to protect the sanctity of the Meito and keep them out of unworthy hands. Her pursuit of Zoro was both because he dishonoured her in their fight and so she could claim Wado Ichimonji. In the New World however we don’t see that as much from Tashigi, even when she sees Shusui she doesn’t make a point to declare taking it from him because he’s unworthy (like Kin’emon would later do), this is because she does acknowledge his strength and worthiness of using these Meito, her personal conflict now though is to be seen as worthy to him as a swordsperson rather than a pirate to a marine.  In reality, Tashigi is instead Zoro’s and Kuina’s foil. She is similar in looks and perspective to Kuina but different in everything else from clumsiness, skill and ambition, the fact that Zoro struggles to handle this leads to the two becoming entwined in their respective journeys. No person gets under Zoro’s skin like Tashigi does, even to a point where he was reluctant to even be in eyeshot of her - how many people have you seen Roronoa Zoro hide from? They are each other’s foil because they are both stubborn people out to prove something but put on two different sides that conflict. That is the true purpose of their dynamic, their confrontations expose one another and show places where they can still grow and I still feel that we haven’t scratched the surface of this relationship.

Argument 5: She’s not Important

A combination of the earlier arguments, Tashigi gets a lot of flack because people think she’s not important enough as a character to have the screentime she gets. While it’s not hard to see why people feel that, it usually comes with people giving up on the idea that there’s a greater plan for her. It may just be me, but I am reluctant to believe that Tashigi appears in several forms of merchandise including calendars, games (as NPCs, Bosses, Supports or playable characters) and even figurines and not have a purpose in the greater scope of the story, do we really expect that from Oda? I doubt that very much! Granted, Wano would’ve been a perfect placement for her to push herself given the views on women in the country and it being the homeland of famous Meito. And yes, she could’ve had a much greater role in Stampede given how well they managed Smoker in it. We are allowed to be disappointed by this, but the fact that Tashigi has remained as consistent in presence as she has been in the show does hint at a bigger role, even if it’s being that wave of revolutionizing the Marines with Coby and Fujitora, her own origins or finally proving herself to the audience and to Zoro, Tashigi is not done and thus she is still important. “Just because they say a bird cannot fly, doesn’t mean that it never will” - Oda SBS 17 on Tashigi and Kuina’s names being named after flightless birds So, Why does Tashigi deserve more Respect? Tashigi as a character is one of Oda’s more subtle progressions. In contrast to Zoro who we see grow, we don’t see how Tashigi gets from A to B, we can also contrast to Coby whose rise becomes as magnificent as his puberty that Tashigi’s growth is much less abrupt and more steady, we see her struggles more than we do Coby where his successes are only heard in passing. Tashigi can also act as the ‘normal person’ in the marines, we compare her to Zoro in strength because she uses a sword but we never give her the benefit of the doubt that Roronoa Zoro is a bloody superhuman, plus not everyone has the great luxury of being trained by Dracule Mihawk for 2 years...furthermore, her challenges against Devil Fruit users are always filled with good intentions and strong willpower, but still self-doubt and shame, if anything Tashigi is one of the most human characters of One Piece for this reason; she learns, she suffers, she grows and she does it all without the luxury of Shonen perks such as superhuman power or endurance. Also she is a good person, she has a strong sense of morality and will, an altruistic desire and even in the situation she gets put in she makes a step that leads to the plot going in a positive direction. And for a character that has been in as many arcs as she has, there is still so much potential left to be untapped that fans are still after 2 decades eager to see from her.

Tashigi is a strong, valiant and just person, who is still really powerful if people stop trying to compare her to the likes of Luffy, Law and Zoro. Even when she fails she picks herself up and can still come out with a small victory from protecting innocents, arresting criminals and escorting children to get help. She is a lot stronger than people give her credit for and it’s for that she deserves respect.

[fallin-flcwer]

JIWON’S TRUTH BOOTH

GENERAL QUESTIONS

1. Please state your full name: “Moon Ji Won” 2. Does your name(s) have any kind of meaning? If so, what is it? “My name has numerous meanings. “Ji” can either mean ‘wise’ or ‘ambitious’ and “Won” can either mean ‘beautiful woman, as well as ‘first’. My parents never really decided what it meant, but I just take it as “ambitious and beautiful woman.””  3. Do you have any nicknames? “Nope” 4. Where were you born? And in which country? “Seoul, South Korea” 5. What is your date of birth? “I was born on June the 22nd, 1998″  6. Of course, the following question; what is your Zodiac sign? “My star sign is Cancer, I believe.” 7. Do you believe in Zodiac signs? “Not completely, but I still find them interesting to read about sometimes.” 8. Where do you live? “I’ve got a house Lilac Wells, I’m staying in while I’m here. I’ve also got a house in Seoul, as well as in Tokyo but I don’t visit that one often since I’m usually busy in the first two.” 9. What is your home situation like? (ex. do you live with your family? Your partner etc.?) “I live on my own.” 10. Do you have any siblings? “I’m an only child.” 11. Do you have any kind of allergies? “None that I know of” 12. Do you own any pets? If so, what kind of pets are they? “Yes! I’ve got a miniature poodle called Bambi and a bombay cat called Byeol” 13. Why did you apply to St Jude’s? “Honestly I just did it for fun. It wasn’t until I got accepted that I realised how big of an opportunity it was.” 14. Did you had to go through a lot audition rounds? “Not really. I had already debut by the time auditions came. Personally, I think I could’ve done a lot better for my debut, but it still got me by.” 15. What is the current course you’re following? If you can switch courses, which one would you switch to and why? “I am currently doing music and dance. I think acting and fashion would be fun” 17. What is your proudest project you’ve done? “Gotta Go! I think some people my argue that Snapping was the better comeback, but I still see it as a sequel to Gotta Go. It definitely the comeback that started steering my career to where it is now.” 18. What is the proudest project that someone’s else has done? “Singular Act I! I think, especially since Everleigh and I were both opening acts for Ruby, I’ve seen her grow so much as an artist.” 19. Do you like FanCons? “Yes!” 20. What do you like about FanCons? “I like being able to meet fans.” 21. What don’t you like about FanCons? “I don’t really have anything bad to say about them.” 22. A fan memory that always stuck with you? Can be positive or negative. "While I was doing a fansign one fan walked towards me, got on her knees and bowed down. It happened so quickly and caught me completely off guard.” 23. Your favorite event so far? “I love anything halloween, to be honest.” 24. What kind of event would you like to see in the future? “Something in Korea, maybe? We’ve got quite a few K-Pop artists here now so it’d be nice to do something there.” 25. Would you recommend St Jude’s to friends, family. etc? “Yes.”

PERSONALITY QUESTIONS

26. What are your positive traits? “I am very ambitious, approachable, and detail-oriented” 27. What are you negative traits? “Sometimes I don’t know when to rest and I kinda set myself into overdrive until I’m satisfied with everything” 28. What would other people describe you as? “Hard-working, always busy and resourceful” 29. What are your pet peeves? “Does constant, loud yawners count?” 30. What makes you happy? “Seeing a project I’ve been working hard on finished.” 31. What makes you upset? “Seeing people not take me seriously because I’m a woman. It doesn’t get to me as much as it used to, but it’s still gets disheartening from time to time.” 32. What is something you love? “My parents, Byeol and Bambi, and my work.” 33. What is something you dislike? “Having my idol and hotel life interfering with each other. I’ve done a pretty good job keeping them separate, but there have been times where they’ve coincided and it got too overbearing.” 34. What are you strengths? “Singing, Dancing, Working” 35. What are you weaknesses? “I can be overly critical of myself when things don’t go to plan.” 36. A misconception people often think of you? “That everything came easy for me. Yes, I’m privileged, but that doesn’t mean that I didn’t work. In fact, it really meant that people expected more from me. I graduated high school and got my degree early, but I worked myself to the bone making sure I was on top of everything. I chose to become an idol as well as working in the hotels, and people gave me hate for it. That’s died down a bit, but still... Both jobs consist of me having to satisfy people, so I have an ongoing cycle of writing reports, writing songs, recording, choreographing, performing, promoting, the list goes on forever and it’s rare that I ever catch time to set aside for myself.” 37. Do you have any fears? “Mice and rats. I’m fine with mice that are kept as pets and stuff, but if I ever found out that there’s a mouse or a rat living in my house. I just might move out.” 38. What scares you the most? “Not being able to live up to people’s expectations of me as the next CEO of the family business.” 39. What do you do to entertain yourself? “I don’t have time to entertain myself, unless choreographing counts, but it’s still work.” 40. What is your MBTI? “I believe I am ESFJ-A” 41. How do you deal with stress? “I think I handle stress relatively well. I kinda just work through it.” 42. Are you a determined person? Are you a stubborn person? “I’m definitely a determined person” 43. Do you consider yourself selfish? “I think sometimes I can be, but after a bit I scold myself for being selfish.”  44. Would you like to be different? “Nah” 45. Are you more introverted (focused on your inner world) or more extraverted (focused on other people and the outer world)? “I’m definitely more extroverted”

ROMANCE QUESTIONS

46. What is your sexual orientation? “I’m heterosexual”  47. Current relationship status? “Single” 48. When was your first kiss? “I think I was about 17″ 49. Do you remember your first date? If so, with who was it? What did you do? “My first date was set up by my parents. It was with a one of their acquaintance’s sons in Tokyo and he showed me around the city.” 50. Have you ever experienced heart-break? “Yes” 51. Have you ever been in love? (If yes, skip to question 53) “Yes” 53. How do you know when you’re in love? "I think it’s when I realise I want to spend time with them outside of work, and I catch myself trying to make time for them despite always being busy.” 54. What would be your ideal date? “A day out exploring. I’m more of a city person, so that’s my preference, but I’m open to anywhere” 55. What is your perspective on marriage? “I’d love to get married one day, but I don’t think I’ve ever have the time for it at this rate. Maybe if I ever quit becoming an idol I will.” 56. (only for non-virgins) Are you a sub, dom or switch? “Pass” 57. What do you think of relationships? “They’re best when both parties are putting equal amounts of effort into it.”  58. What do you think of one-night stands? “I don’t really have an opinion on them. I’m not gonna lie, I’ve experienced one or two before when I was younger, but it’s not something I plan on doing again.”  59. Are you still a virgin? “No”  60. Most attractive trait in a different person? “A nice personality” 61. What matters most to you when it comes to a relationship? “Honesty and loyalty. I’m also an incredibly busy person, so I hope that they can be a bit patient with me too.” 62. Are you comfortable with PDA? Or would you be comfortable with PDA? “I think so? I’m relatively private when it comes to relationships but I think once I have the confidence to go public I’d be fine with PDA.” 63. Are you more of a type to be asked out or the type to ask the other out? “I’d rather be asked out.” 64. How do you express love to the other? “I change my schedule up to make time for them.” 65. Who is your celebrity crush? “Sung Hoon”

GETTING DEEP QUESTIONS

66. Do you regret anything? “Yes” 67. Is there something you would like to re-do? So, start all over again? “Pass” 68. What is something you would never share with anyone?  “As rewarding as my life is, it can get draining.” 69. When was the last time you cried? Why did you cry? “I definitely had a mental breakdown sometime between after Boxing Day and New Years. I got into a little argument with one of my Dad’s competitors during an event in Seoul and I had a little breakdown when I got home.” 70. Most memorable event that happened in your time in St Judes? This could be anything: “Winning Female Artist of the Year at Spotlight. Since there were so many artists nominated that had a big impact on St. Judes I was 100% certain that I wasn’t going to get it.”  71. One thing you wish you could do all over? “High school. To be honest, I didn’t really make many friends growing up, since I was so determined to rush through my studies.” 72. Someone you miss? “My mother.” 73. Something you wish you could forget? “My past relationship”  74. Who has the biggest impact on you? “My parents” 75. What is your perspective on love? Is it beautiful? Does it scare you? “Love can be risky, but if you play your cards right it can be rewarding.” 76. What has hurt you in the past that you don’t want others to go through? “Pass” 77. What is something you have gained, something you have lost and something you let go of during the past year? “I think I’ve gained a lot of direction as to where I want to go as an Idol in the past year. I haven’t necessarily lost anything, but I’ve let go of a lot of the negativity people usually give me when it come to my role in the family business.” 78. Have you ever lost a friend? do you wish you would still be friends? “I’ve definitely neglected some friendships because of my workload. If I got the chance I’d love to reconnect with them.” 79. Do you have any triggers? What is the history behind these triggers and are they related to any disorders or mental illnesses? “Nope”  80. If you could meet your 16 year old self, what would tell them? “Keep pushing through the same way you do, but don’t be afraid to relax whenever you need to.”

RANDOM QUESTION ROUND

81. Summer or Winter? “Winter” 82. Cats or dogs? “Dogs” 83. Beach or mountains? “Mountains” 84. Phone calls or texting? “Phone calls" 85. Have you ever skipped class? “No”

[whatiwillsay]

submission:

re: regarding your posts earlier: as a kaylor (if u don’t mind) //

i’m a bit taken aback that you got a ‘kaylor endgame only’ vibe from my post. you projected a whole lot onto it there. and i think it’s a huge misconception about kaylors in general tbh.

i simply tried to express that it’d be tragic if they never got to acknowledge each other publicly after such a long history together. everything taylor expressed about kaylor in her music..those are real things, real emotions, it is/was a huge part of her life .

ofc it can be same for some of her other relationships but as someone who became a gaylor during kaylor times, the length of the relationship,  ofc karlie herself and so on (see below) i’m more attached to them than say swiftgron, just like you are the other way around it seems. it’s not a competition. but i think people tend to forget that kaylors are gaylors. and we are taylor fans first too. we’ll support taylor either way (even if people might not believe it).

so in conclusion: yes you could say it about all her relationships but i singled out kaylor bc imo it was the longest, most stable relationship, taylor expressed being the most content despite some external drama (–> which is also why i’m still a kaylor) 

💙🧡

p.s. i don’t agree with how you worded why swiftgron/kaylor broke up for various reasons (mainly abigail& selena) but i don’t think debating it yet again will be productive and we won’t agree 

submission⬆️⬆️⬆️

last kaylor post before the koming kaylor katurday bekause (ok i’ll stop with the ks) you took the time to post all of this

1.  (this isn’t directed at you anon this is for other readers) i think kaylors can still be kaylors (so have their fav ship be kaylor) but still see them as broken up obviously you still think they’re together and that’s 100% fine, but i just wanna take a moment to say we should normalize that

2. to me kaylor ending is just as tragic as swiftgron ending which you at least seem to understand we have differing opinions there to a degree

3.  i have seen many many kaylors who are only interesting in gaylor/tay for the kaylor of it all.  i have seen receipts on mass exoduses of the fanbase because taylor hasn’t come out with karlie yet or karlie hasn’t left joe yet - obviously this is not you and i hope it’s a rarity but i have seen many many pleges to abandon taylor from kaylors if she does not do what they want her to.

4.  i didn’t say you were kaylor end game only (though as i i just described many kaylors seem to act as though they are and i don’t think that’s a misconception)  i asked why you had an emotional attachment to a certain end game (which you have just explained now so thank you for sharing that - i do agree it would be 100% heartbreaking if she never got to acknowledge karlie publicly [ofc...same goes for dianna if you ask me])

5.  as far as agreeing to disagree on karlie’s potentential betrayal that’s fine i don’t need any of you to agree with me i truly don’t have answers only theories but like i do kind of want to apologize to my kaylors for...idk having that take? like i can’t help where the facts lead me personally but obviously you know...i hate to say stuff that might rub kaylors the wrong way but y’all are sending asks to the pro chaos dumbass who started a swiftgron blog and rennossaince in 2020 so i hope my kaylors will take my takes on that with a good natured grain of salt and know i’m truly just going off the evidence that seems plain to me

thanks for using my preferred orange and blue hearts lol 🧡💙 war eagle🐯

anyway

all other kaylor asks or materials i’m going to hold off on publishing until saturday for our first official kaylor katurday we can have discourse AND post kute kaylor stuff

feel free to keep sending stuff in or if anyone REALLY wants to chat ab it just go ahead and im me.  i will keep you anon.

[spookyflowerbouquet]

Email Marketing Myths You Should Ignore

Sales & Marketing 〉 Marketing Marketing Myths You Should Ignore. Debra Murphy July 20, 2013. Email marketing can enhance your relationship with your subscribers and drive your revenue. Email; Entrepreneurship. 3 Marketing Myths About LinkedIn You Should Ignore. Those false ideas and take advantage of the benefits LinkedIn marketing offers: Myth No.

Email Marketing Myths You Should Ignore Someone

Email Marketing Myths You Should Ignore Others

Direct Mail Myths You Should Ignore

April 07 2016

Most direct mail marketers stick to the same bag of tricks that have been working for decades. While there has been plenty of valuable wisdom, experience, and strategies passed down from one generation of marketers to the next, there also have been some harmful myths that have persisted.

This industry seems particularly prone to following the book, even when evidence suggests it’s time for a change. As it gets harder to grab and keep the attention of target audiences through direct mail and other mediums, it becomes even more costly to cling to counterproductive marketing myths.

We’re dispelling the most persistent direct mail marketing myths so that you can hone in on the factors that make a difference in your bottom line results.

It’s All About Clever Techniques

Myth 3: Email marketing is no longer effective Building your own in-house email list and providing a focused and well executed email marketing campaign is still very effective, especially when integrated into your content marketing activities. While you may have heard it said before, we will continuously hammer home this point: SPLIT TEST as much as you can! We hope this article helped debunk the 7 most popular email marketing myths that you should ignore when looking to optimize your marketing campaigns.

As much as marketers would love to believe that the perfectly worded offer or a tricky technique can hypnotize customers into doing whatever a marketer pleases, it just isn’t true. Focusing on tricking or commanding people to act will take you away from what you should be focusing on: putting a quality offer in the right hands at the right time and making the conversion as clear, appealing, and simple as possible.

Your audience will likely see right through any tricky techniques. If you turn off a potential customer, you’re only dragging your success rate down.

All Features Should Be Turned Into Benefits

Have you ever heard the marketing saying: “People don’t want drills; they want holes.” There’s some wisdom in there, but today there are plenty of market segments where you can thrive with a feature-based approach. Talk about the holes, but don’t forget about the drill. The enthusiasts in your market segment may just want to dwell on the object of their affection without being hit over the head with its benefits.

Imitation Breeds Success

More amateur and professional direct mail marketers have been brought down by this myth than any of the others on this list. The logic is simple: if I see a mailer that’s working for someone else, I’ll just copy it and make some minor tweaks to fit my purpose. Bam! Proven method for success.

Not so fast.

What you’ll learn the hard way quickly is that every business, service, product, list, and offer is its own animal. If you’re not digging into what makes your audience and your offer unique, you’re not maximizing your potential return on investment.

The surest way to ensure you’re avoiding the harmful myths of direct mail marketing is to work with experts that utilize data-driven solutions focused on finding custom strategies to target your most relevant, profitable demographics.

Visit the DataPrint homepage to learn more about the myth-busting power of our cutting-edge direct mail marketing services.

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June 12, 2018

Posted by: Robert Duke

Category: Business, Marketing

In this era of new technology, email manages to stay alive by helping businesses to connect with their prospects cost-effectively. No matter how many communication platforms get released on a daily basis, nothing can replace email considering the high demand it has across both the B2B and B2C space. It shows how one can trust email in the future as well.

Email as an active mode of communication has taken a significant leap in the marketing segment. Like every other medium of communication, email has its own set of myths that keep people dilemma about its usability and relevance for their business. Here in this blog, let us debunk some of those myths one by one.

1. Avoid Sending Repeated Emails

Repeated emails are annoying for many of us. Hence this misconception may not sound completely wrong from a reader’s point of view. But, when the time taken to compose marketing emails goes in vain, sender thinks of sending it again to reach all the audience. In such cases, instead of copying the same content, the sender can change the subject line and forward it to the recipients who have never opened the earlier email. This method will increase the read recipients list dramatically.

2. Do Not Use A Long Subject Line

The subject line is an essential factor to be considered in any email marketing strategy. Be it a short line or a longer one; it conveys what sender has to say in brief. But, considering the length of it, few believe that it should always be short and easily readable. A study conducted by Return Path showed us how character count in subject line affects the read rates of an email. The read rate was less impacted because of the length of a subject line.

3. Marketing Emails Should Be Of Short Length

This belief has taken its emergence by considering the reader’s point of view. According to this, emails should be of limited length making it easily understandable. But, one cannot cut short everything to minimize the character count in email contents. Reducing the length of email may result in losing its meaning, and the readers may not understand what the sender had to say. So, sending a long email is not a problem, but one should identify the type of reader and how much interest they have in going through it.

4. Tuesday Will Result In More Read Rates

Some marketers follow a particular day of a week such as Tuesday to send marketing emails. They observe the work pattern of a regular person to make this decision. While Wednesday and Thursday are the busy days, people seem lazier on Monday and Friday. So, marketers pick Tuesday as the best day to send such emails. But, few studies proved this wrong by showing more read rates on other weekdays and weekends instead of Tuesday.

5. Remove Inactive Subscribers After Six Months

It is a usual tendency to keep the data clean by removing all the unwanted information from the database. Similarly, businesses think of deleting inactive subscriber data from their list to keep it clean. But, few studies have shown that inactive users go through their email after six months. So, it is preferred to retain user’s data even after six months of inactiveness.

6. Marketing Emails Should Be Attractive

It is a common belief that marketing emails should be well polished and be able to attract the readers at first sight. Though this may seem correct in some cases, few studies have shown complete opposite result for this strategy. So, one should study the reader and their interest in receiving such emails before concluding.

7. Low Unsubscribe Rates Are Good For Business

Subscription is another factor firms use to compare their success rate. So, there is a misconception that as the unsubscribe rate increases, there is a decrease in the demand for their business. But, they fail to notice that the uninterested people remove themselves from the subscription list, which in turn helps the marketing emails to target only potential buyers.

Email Marketing Myths You Should Ignore Someone

8. Email May Land In The Spam Folder

Some fear that the Internet Service Provider (ISP) may label their emails as spam without providing any reason. This fear of going unnoticed has compelled businesses to compose marketing emails carefully without using particular words such as “Free.” But, some studies have failed to prove this right, since ISPs do not follow such strategy to label junk emails. Instead of keeping such emails aside, businesses should inform the customers whenever they have something free to offer.

There are lots of other myths revolving around email marketing. But, only when studied intensely, you can debunk them in no time. So, give no ear to such tales. Instead, focus mainly on the target audience and their interest in receiving marketing emails. Email marketing can take your business to great heights with less cost. Hence, try to implement them in your businesses whenever required.

Robert Duke is a Marketing Manager and Spokesperson of Blue Mail Media.

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[johannas-motivational-insults]

Catradora are both tops and Catra is a dom, change my mind

(Actually, don’t change my mind. I’m not writing this to cause drama, I’m writing this because Catradora sexual discourse is frustrating me and I want basically a masterpost to link back to whenever I need to explain my apparently controversial views on this shit. Hopefully some other people will also find that it speaks to/for them and be able to use it for the same purpose. Please don’t troll me, I’m but a simple girl who needs to be understood. I am, however, totally open to respectful debate. :)

Okay, I’d like to take some time here to follow up on my previous posts about how Catra and Adora are both vers-tops and Catra is so not a sub. I feel a little silly writing a long meta about the sexual dynamics of a femslash ship in a cartoon aimed at kids and teens, but there’s reason for it. For some reason, lots of fics write one or both of them in ways that feel extremely out of character, perhaps to make them fit the mold for a particular kink or sexual trope. And people will write what “works” for them ugh, and I’m not kinkshaming on principle, but some of it feels extremely disrespectful to the characters. Particularly Catra, given her backstory and struggles so far in the series, and I find this rather troubling.

And unfortunately, some of these things that are written to fit some sexual trope have ended up entering the more general discourse and morphing the fanon interpretation of the characters into something urecognizable, something that would make the canon characters mad if they read it. That’s another big reason why I’m bothering to write all this.

Let’s start with a clarification: when I said Catradora are both tops, I meant they would fight each other for control of an encounter and that’s totally fine and we don’t need to make hard statements about who is the top because it comes naturally to both of them. But I didn’t mean they would necessarily want control for the same reasons or that they are interchangeable in the sack. IMO, Catra is a dominant vers-top and Adora is the definition of a service top (but also versatile if that’s what works for her partner). These may be unpopular opinions (honestly why?), but I am fully prepared to back them up. *cracks knuckles*

I’m going to explain my biggest point first and then put a bunch of additional thoughts under the cut. That point being we need to consider Catra and Adora’s relationships with power.

Here’s the thing. For Catra, power is safety, power is an accomplishment she is proud of. She has fought/longed her whole life to be taken seriously. She has always felt disrespected and like she lacked agency (both of which are true, actually), so feeling respected and in control is very important to her.

This is especially true of her relationship with Adora, as she feels like Adora has been controlling her for most of their lives and doesn’t respect her. She resents that Adora has been in the “power position” for ages and is actively trying to change that.

Didn’t anybody else see how she got off on those guards standing at attention as she walked by in 2x01, and how tickled she was standing on top of Dryl in 2x02, overlooking her troops taking it over? Catra gets off on power, why would she not also literally get off on it?

To Catra, giving up power would feel like a failure.

For Adora, power is a burden. Yes she is an absolute control freak, but that’s because she feels like she needs to control everything because if anything goes wrong it’s all her fault. Shadow Weaver instilled this idea in her when she was very young, the way she was groomed to be a leader in the Horde reinforced it, and now being She-Ra has made that feeling inescapable for her.

I’ve seen people use the “person who has a lot of power irl wants to give it up in the sack” concept to explain why they see Catra as a sub, but imo it works way better for Adora because she has always been saddled with power, even when she didn’t want it. I will get into this more under the cut, but we have seen Adora resenting and struggling with all her responsibilities on multiple occasions.

To Adora, giving up power would feel like a relief (once she got past the mental block of needing to control everything).

(This isn’t all to say that Catra would be running shit 100% of this time, I do actually think both are somewhat versatile in terms of top/bottom and dom/sub classification. I’m just making a hard case in this direction because I think they lean this way and because so many people seem weirdly convinced that Adora would 100% dominate Catra all the time and it’s weird and a little offensive.)

Now, let’s move on to my additional thoughts! The tl;dr of it all is: brattiness =/= submissiveness (quite the opposite, in fact), why the hell would an abuse survivor want to relive her trauma, this master/pet nonsense is racist af, Adora is not a starfish wtf, and Adora is a good little soldier who likes following orders.

(Plus new bonus content: Catra’s love and protection of Adora signals she’s a top, not just a dom.)

(A quick sidebar on semantics: I find the definition of “top” to be a little weird with wlw couples because we stole top/bottom from mlms but it doesn’t work the same way. We don’t always use strap-ons and when we do it’s not uncommon for both partners to use it on each other. So when I say top I might be referring to use of a strap-on or penetration in general, but more often I use it the way straight people do, literally referring to who is on top/who wants to be on top. [And for Catradora I really do think that’s both of them, though perhaps for somewhat different reasons.] Meanwhile, when I say dominant/submissive I mean who is running shit/in charge vs. who is pliable to their partner’s whims/willing to give up control. I don’t necessarily mean anything to do with BDSM, and I will say so if that is what I am referring to. So, hopefully the way I am using those two terms makes sense.)

Let’s start by clearing something up in regards to Catra: Brattiness does not equal submissiveness. This is a common misconception because yes, some submissive types will use brattiness to goad their partners into aggression. However, brattiness is first and foremost a defense mechanism. Brats are usually people who lack power and make up for it by acting out. It’s a way to feel like you have some power by resisting the unfavorable dynamic and/or causing the other person to lose control while you keep it together (causing a feeling of superiority/satisfaction that you caused that reaction). Why do you think so many youngest children are bratty? It’s the only way we can feel like anything but the omega of our family. Despite being about the same age, Catra basically feels like the younger sibling to the favored and overachieving Adora. Don’t you think she’d love to take her down a peg?

Yes, bratty behavior is meant to provoke a reaction, but it’s often an attempt to gain power, not lose it. Unfortunately, kinky stereotypes have caused this misconception that bratty characters must be subs looking to be dominated (and/or punished if into the BDSM stuff) or bottoms looking to be aggressively topped. Even if that is sometimes the case in the bedroom, we haven’t and will never see how Catradora interact in the bedroom, and people don’t always act the same in those situations as they do out in the world.

Sticking with Catra for now, I gotta say, anything that makes her a BDSM-type sub feels really problematic to me. Catra is an abuse survivor, and putting her in situations where she would be basically reliving her trauma (especially if they don’t take the care to establish the reasons for this behavior in a way that feels organic to the character) is extremely disrespectful. We’ve seen Shadow Weaver restrain Catra with magic and take control of her body, and it’s heavily implied by Catra’s behavior that Shadow Weaver has beaten her in the past. She is constantly struggling to get out from under Shadow Weaver’s thumb, why would she then want to go submit to someone else, especially in a way that would reenact this trauma? (Again, this is especially true of her relationship with Adora, considering that she feels like Adora has been dominating and controlling her for most of their lives and she heavily resents this dynamic.)

Then there’s all the racist implications of Catra in restraints, especially collars. First of all, cats usually hate collars and Catra in particular would hate it. She doesn’t want anyone to take control of her, Shadow Weaver’s done that enough for a lifetime. Then there’s the really gross implication that people want to domesticate Catra. Master/pet scenarios are a little fucked up when the “pet” character is a hybrid of a common house pet. Like, yikes. If you can do enough character work to make me believe she’d be into that, maybe we can talk. But, can’t anyone else see why this is kinda fucked up?

All this sub/bottom Catra stuff really makes no sense to me, and I can’t help but agree with the posts about how Catra is a top but the fandom likes to write her as a bottom because they ID with her and want She-Ra to top them. Like, Catra is her own character, not an empty vessel you get to mess with to self-insert into a sex scene with a buff goddess.

That being said, I do respect the power bottom Catra headcanon even if I don’t agree with it, if for no other reason than Adora is a total service top so her slotting into that role makes some amount of sense. My issue is more with the idea that Catra is inherently a total bottom (as opposed to her fitting in where she does with Adora) and with the dom/sub stuff in general. Because yeah, no.

Look, cats are like the least submissive creature on this planet, and Catra is one of the least submissive characters on the show. Adora, meanwhile, is basically a big puppy dog. If you have a dog and a cat together, which one ends up being submissive? Like, honestly.

On that note, let’s move on to Adora.

As I said above, Adora is the very definition of a service top. Adora is, as Catra said in 1x01, a people pleaser. She wants to please the people around her, both by making them happy and by making them proud/living up to their expectations. She’s also the type of person who tends to go for what she wants, tackle her problems head on. I honestly can’t imagine a situation where Adora would not be focused first and foremost on giving her partner pleasure, whether that means taking charge and fucking them with a strap-on or letting them ride her face until she suffocates. Or even if it means letting them have their way with her, as long as she can reciprocate and make them feel as good as they made her feel (hopefully better, because she’s super competitive).

Here, we run into another problem. I’ve seen Adora written multiple times as a melty starfish who lets Catra top her and doesn’t try very hard (if at all) to return the favor when Catra blows her mind. Maybe she whines a little about wanting to do stuff to Catra if she initially turns it down, but she doesn’t try to take control. Like, please. Do you seriously think Adora would stand for that shit? Canon Adora would get so huffy if Catra tried to turn it down, because Adora needs to prove her prowess and please the people closest to her. I���m not advocating for dubcon here or saying we should write that, just that based on Adora’s personality she would at least try. Adora is not a pillow princess, and certainly not a starfish. Like, that should be obvious.

However, I do see Adora as someone who could easily end up being more submissive in the bedroom. She wouldn’t necessarily be at first because she is so used to being in charge, but once she experienced that loss of control I think she would enjoy it. Here is where that “person who has a lot of power irl wants to give it up in the sack” idea comes back. I already went into this earlier, how power is a burden for her and letting someone else take charge would be a relief for her.

Fact is, this is already canon. Adora likes following orders. Madame Razz literally called her out in 1x03 for how she wants other people to tell her what to think and do. She was constantly striving to please Shadow Weaver, to carry out her orders and be a good soldier, and she never gave much thought to whether these were the right things to do until the truth smacked her in the face. She was happy to be promoted to Force Captain, but to me that read as her being pleased at the validation/recognition for her good work more than the power the promotion gave her (whereas for Catra, it was obviously both). When she moved to Bright Moon, she suddenly had this burning need to prove herself to Queen Angella. She craves approval from authority figures, and while Catra does too, Adora seems to have this very deep intrinsic need to be valued and appreciated for her service.

Like I said, a total service top. But she is a top. So is Catra. As I said in my first post about this, that is part of what’s fun about this ship. Let them playfully fight for control. We don’t have to assign these roles so rigidly, the only reason I’m making a hard case for dominant Catra is to counteract the common discourse/fanfic tropes for these two. Tbh I don’t even think they’d be very kinky, their lives are crazy enough and I think they’d just enjoy the comfort and intimacy and fun of vanilla-ish sex, once they got past all their hangups and reconciled. Catra likes her power, but once she got comfortable enough with Adora again she would be able to let go of that at times and I think it would be freeing for her.

Okay that’s about it for this ridiculous rant, but I hope I’ve given you all something to think about. Please try to consider the characters’ histories and personalities when writing sexy fanfic or remarking on the sexual power dynamics between these two. That stuff is so much better anyway when it actually feels true to the characters and shows respect for them.

ETA: I foolishly did not think to include this in the post initially, but Catra’s history of protecting and caring for Adora in the small ways that she can suggests she’s a top, not just a dom. It’s worth noting that she feels like a top-type personality forced into a role not suited for her, i.e. a role where she feels weak and dependent on her partner. I’m not gonna go into all the details here because this is a whole other meta I’ve written since, but you can find all that in this post. (I have since edited it into a PG version to address the non-nsfw aspects of what I was trying to say, but the original is still there.)

[shadowmaat]

Hello! I really love your writing, it's absolutely perfect! I've been thinking about this and I really wanted to your thoughts, if you don't mind! How do you think maul would react if obi doubted his feelings? Or vice versa? If this is a pain don't worry about it!!! ♡♡♡♡

Hello! I’m glad you love my stuff! ♥ As for the question... *cracks knuckles*

Let’s see... If Maul thought that Obi-Wan was having second thoughts about their relationship he would withdraw. 100%. Lots of angst and pain and self-recriminations along with a lot of deflective anger and trying to drive Obi-Wan away. Depending on the AU and timing, he might flat-out run away- sorry, I mean he’d leave this stupid mess behind because he never wanted it anyway! Hmph! He’d stew in his own doubts and self-recriminations. How could he have been stupid enough to think Kenobi might care about him? Ugh! Stupid stuck up Jedi! It was probably all some kind of trick!

Obi-Wan would be fighting an uphill battle to convince Maul that no, he really DOES care for him and it isn’t just an act or a trick; he wouldn’t do that! It’d almost be like starting over from scratch and rebuilding their trust, except harder this time. He’d likely have to be a lot more open about his feelings and about proving them. Hopefully he’d also recognize Maul’s lashing out for what it is and wouldn’t take it to heart and internalize it or he could wind up in a downward spiral of his own. It’d take a lot of slow, careful work, but his very determination to see this through and win Maul back would probably be part of what eventually convinces Maul that he might be serious.

The reverse would probably be even more of a disaster. If Obi-Wan thought Maul was having second thoughts he’d probably step back to try and give him more space, which would likely cause Maul to think Obi was the one losing interest and then send things spiraling out of control in all directions. LOL! It’d be an angsty terrible mess and a lot harder to sort out. Obi-Wan withdraws out of perceived politeness, which causes Maul to withdraw out of paranoia, which confirms Obi’s misconception, which fuels Maul’s anger and suspicions... In this case you’d probably need an outside party to bang their heads together and get them to JUST FUCKING TALK TO EACH OTHER, YOU NERFS.

Meanwhile... if you want to go for the potentially lighter stuff and say that Maul thought he somehow needed to “prove” his feelings to Obi-Wan? I can see him starting off offended at the idea that he needed to prove anything, but then he’d set off to make absolutely sure there was no doubt left in Obi-Wan’s mind about it. From shoving flowers in Obi-Wan’s face (because he heard flowers were a thing couples gave to each other), to pinning him to the mats at every opportunity during workouts, to leaving small gifts around and then denying all knowledge of them, I think Maul would ultimately see it as some form of combat where it takes a certain combination of moves in order to “win.” Though again, mileage varies depending on the AU. Sometimes Maul is more introspective and could go for more traditional methods (while still avoiding an actual declaration of love).

Obi-Wan would probably give gifts openly and would compliment Maul more often. I can see him being more touch-oriented, too, whether it’s just resting a hand on Maul’s arm or offering to give him a backrub or whatever. Or preening his wings, of course, in the Taking Flight AU. ♥ I don’t think either of them is good at actually SAYING how they feel (unless they’ve reached a point where there are no doubts and so this wouldn’t be an issue). 

Hopefully that answers your question. There’d be lots of angst, but potentially a lot of fun, too. If there were SINCERE doubts rather than a misunderstanding, that’d be a different kettle of kittens and whole different brands of angst. So many different avenues to explore! But in the end, if they’re lucky, they still wind up reaching the end together. :)

[kolbisneat]

MONTHLY MEDIA: June 2019

Halfway through the year! Here’s how I spent the month of June.

……….FILM……….

Godzilla: King of the Monsters (2019) Delivers on everything I’d want out of a Godzilla movie: destruction, cool monsters, and bland humans making crazy decisions. It perhaps took itself a little seriously, but that also felt on-brand, you know? Hopefully this series keeps going so we can get to a Mechagodzilla showdown.

Booksmart (2019) So good. We caught this at the end of its run so it’s a shame I can’t tell more people to go out and see it. Great bff chemistry, nuanced cast, funny, and solid direction. It felt familiar and new. Oh but as a former teacher, the Jessica Williams bits were all sorts of problematic.

Rocketman (2019) Just wonderful! The framing device of rehab wasn’t just a break from the biopic tropes, it was a crucial element towards reinforcing the main thrust of the film. Sure it goes through the rise and fall of a star, but it uses that arc to show the growth of a human. That’s why this is great. Also Taron Egerton is just overwhelmingly great.

……….TELEVISION……….

The Bachelorette (Episode 15.04 to 15.07) I worry that Hannah isn’t going to make it to the end of the season without some sort of emotional break. The slightly unhinged antics were fun at first, but now it feels like it’s bordering on full-on meltdown. I still long for a season where we’re given simple romance and good good friendships, but until then I suppose we’re stuck with Luke P. It’s really hard to watch a genuinely problematic relationship continue but hopefully he’ll be gone soon. Also that clip episode was next level.

The Magicians (Episode 1.10 to 3.08) It’s still doing a great job of acting as a sort of remix of the books. The stuff from book 2 is carrying over to the later seasons and while it’s not moving quite as briskly as the first, it’s still doing a great job of showing a different perspective and interpretation of the core plot elements.

……….READING……….

Thisby Thestoop and the Black Mountain by Zac Gorman (Complete) I put this on hold at the library thinking it was a graphic novel. Then I saw it was categorized as “children’s so I figured, knowing it was a collab between Gorman and Sam Bosma, it was an all-ages comic. Turns out it was a children’s chapter book and I loved it! Light-hearted, touching, and full of lovely illustrations by Bosma, it delivered everything I wanted in a format I wasn’t expecting. Also it’s about the adventures of a D&D-styled dungeon’s gamekeeper, Thisby Thestoop. So if you have a kid (or you, yourself) want an RPG-adjacent read, this is a great choice.

Norse Mythology by Neil Gaiman (Complete) Compilations like this are always a lot of fun and I find it interesting to pick up themes when reading a collection of myths. There’s an awful lot of punishment in Greek mythology and in reading these, I really picked up on a lot of tests. Tests of strength or drinking ability or speed and it’s all rather fascinating. I admit that Gaiman’s writing is what brought me to the book but it’s rather subdued. Very cool to read how interested in Norse Mythology he is and it adds another layer to his other books (particularly American Gods). I don’t know if I’d recommend it if you were only a fan of Gaiman’s work, but I’d definitely suggest it if you’re keen to learn more about Thor and Loki and the gang.

Motherlands by Simon Spurrier & Rachel Stott (Complete) I love bonkers sci-fi. There are giant fleshy bounty hunters, pixelated teleporting guns, tiny lizard people, and civilizations all on the backs of crabs, but at the end of the day this book is about the relationship between a mother and her daughter. Sure, both are bounty hunters, but it uses the fantastic to explore the personal and that’s what my favourite speculative fiction does best.

Black Hammer Vol. 1: Secret Origins by Jeff Lemire and Dean Ormston (Complete) Think alternate Justice League trapped on a farm in an alternate reality (likely our own). It’s a family drama set in a small town and it’s really good! At first it felt like a “this is our version of Shazam! This is our version of Martian Manhunter!” but the characters are breaking away from the tropes and it’s in that deviation that the book really shines. Worth checking out.

The Creepy Case Files of Margo Maloo by Drew Weing (Complete) As far as all-ages comics go, this has a good range of appeal. It touches on topics like gentrification and xenophobia, but uses monsters to communicate them. The main characters didn’t really resonate with me (the POV character doesn’t get to take much action and the expert is perhaps a little cold for someone meant to show compassion for all). There’s a second volume and while I didn’t love this, I want to check out the next chapter to see where it’s all going.

……….AUDIO……….

Factually (Podcast) If you know Adam Ruins Everything (either the show, youtube clips, or the podcast) then this is a natural continuation. I’m still not sure why the transition from the other podcast to this as it feels essentially the same, so I can only assume it was a contractual or savvy business move. Also the podcast is a deeper dive into common misconceptions in the world and it has Andrew W. K. for the intro music. What more could you want? 

……….GAMING……….

Maze of the Blue Medusa (Satyr Press) We had a bit of a lull this month from me being sick, but the party continues to hesitantly explore deeper into the maze and so is running into more dangerous encounters! It’s all very exciting.

Cadence of Hyrule: Crypt of the NecroDancer featuring The Legend of Zelda (Brace Yourself Games) Having never played the original indie game (Crypt of the Necrodancer) I found it to be a steep learning curve and I died a whoooooole bunch at the start. Now I feel like I’ve found the literal (and metaphorical) rhythm of the game. Lots of fun, a great blend of new and familiar Zelda elements, and just a generally breezy game that can be very difficult. Oh also you can play as Zelda! For the whole game! 100% recommend.

Gato Roboto (Devolver Digital) Perfect bite-sized game. Three-ish hours of a cat in a mech suit is exactly what I wanted and it didn’t fail to deliver. The bosses are challenging though I admit most of the other enemies were pretty chill. Worth the modest cost and the whole thing was a lot of fun.

And that’s it! As always, feel free to send me any recommendos as I’m always looking for something new to watch/read/hear/play!

Happy Sunday.