#but also like I said yesterday: I haven't got it in me atm to do a starter call so. memes are the best way to get smth going with me adfhjg

[byanyan]

i'm not gonna reblog them all bc it takes up so much dash space but here are some memes i reblogged yesterday for anyone who may have missed them but is interested in starting a new thread with me ♡

[yeeterthek33per]

Two's Company, Three's A Crowd, Four And Five Say Let Chaos Reign (Katrina Gorry x Reader)

A/n Requested. Part three to Missing Toddlers and Mayhem :) Will Edit later, cause I'm at work atm y'all.

(Y'all this took me so long freaking long to write like 😭)

Content/Warning(s): mildly suggestive, warning you now, it does get a little itty bit spicy. Harper, Kyra, R, and Chacha ganging up on Katrina.

Hot Stuff❤️🥵

"So do I get to know where we're going or are we doing a surprise again, because the last time we did this, I got my butt kicked on a public beach."

Katrina🔥❤️

"If I recall correctly, that was your fault, Miss L/n."

Katrina🔥❤️

"Also, no 😘"

Hot Stuff❤️🥵

"I don't recall going into this knowing you were a professional slide tackler😫"

Katrina🔥❤️

"Could have left the gear in the boot and never mentioned it. You should know us footballers are legally obligated to accept rondo challenges 😜"

Hot Stuff❤️🥵

"☹️"

Katrina🔥❤️

"Turn that frown upside down, Babe😊"

Hot Stuff❤️🥵

"🙃"

Katrina🔥❤️

"Smartass🙄"

Katrina🔥❤️

"But close enough."

Katrina🔥❤️

"Just be ready by 12, I'll be there soon😘"

Hot Stuff ❤️🥵

"Of course, see you soon, Gorgeous😘"

Hot Stuff ❤️🥵

"Wait"

Hot Stuff ❤️🥵

"What do I wear??"

Katrina🔥❤️

"Hike meets cozy casual😘"

Hot Stuff ❤️🥵

"Got it, thanks, Cutie😘"

You'd been talking non stop in the days between the last time you'd seen each other in person.

Over the phone, via text, even a facetime at some point, where Harper managed to sneak in and say a very happy hello to you.

The little girl manages to bring a massive smile to your face every time Katrina talks about her.

There was always a smile on your face lately, or so your sister had pointed out just yesterday.

"I swear that woman's got you glued to your phone, dorky little smile and everything."

"Leave me alone, Ash." You whine.

A soft rap on your door lifts your head from your current position of smiling over your phone.

You really need to stop proving her point.

Ashley opens the door, a small smirk already on her face making you roll your eyes.

"Can I help you?"

"It's date time soon, why are you not ready?"

"How would you know what-"

"You told me yesterday, all dreamy eyed. Geez, she got you hypnotised too now?"

You huff.

"Whatever, why are you in here?"

"Because you're being awfully quiet about this Kat and I'm worried, because you haven't said a word about who she is or what she does."

"I haven't been murdered, I'm fine, you can stop grilling, nor are you grilling her when she gets here."

"I have to do my sisterly duties, now hurry up and get ready or else I'll have longer with her because you're running late for your date."

Glancing at the clock on your wall, she's right, it's about forty or so minutes before Katrina is due.

Standing up, you shoo the woman out of your room and quickly jump into the shower, grabbing out a pair of hiking pants, a simple short sleeve shirt and a light blue denim jacket.

By the time you're out of the shower dressed and touching up your hair, there's a knock at the door downstairs.

You fire down them, shoving your sister, who's racing you to the door, away.

As smoothly as you can, you open the door with a warm smile.

Katrina's warm smile greets your own.

She's beautiful as ever and you tell her as such, the long sleeve jacket almost matching your own except she's in shorts and sneakers and a light pink button up underneath it.

"Hey, Beautiful."

You step out the door to greet the shorter woman, arms wrapping around her, her leaning up into you, hands settling on your shoulder blades.

"Hi, Cutie."

You pout softly as she goes to pull away, and then she chuckles meeting your demands with her own lips.

Humming softly in appreciation, you squeeze her waist.

"You ready?"

Nodding, you go to shut the door behind you, keys, phone, wallet and water bottle already with you.

Of course, Ashley decides now is the perfect time to pop out, only, she pauses, surprise on her expression.

"Well... I was going to do the whole sisterly, bring her back by ten talk but... I don't need to. You two have fun!"

And with that, she slams the door behind you, giving you a loving tap to the butt.

Katrina looks confused, matching your own bewilderment at your sisters actions.

"I'm gonna be honest, I have no idea what that was."

You cough into your palm, covering a half laugh.

"Anyway, continuing on. Are we good to go?"

She nods, grabbing you by the hand, leading you to the car parked in your driveway.

Clipping in, she reverses out and starts driving off in the direction of the northern exit from the outer city, a drive you know well enough, having gone this way quite a few times.

She leans over and hands you a black cable, winking at you from her spot in the driver's seat.

"Passenger princess duties are all yours."

The cheeky grin makes you roll yours playfully with a small huff.

"Sure, babe."

Switching to some music you'd both listened to that Saturday night, your hand settles in hers across the console as you hit the highway.

"So, do I get to know, yet?"

"Nope."

It's short, the little smile on her lips doing little to mask the amusement in her tone, her brow quirking a little at the pout on your face.

"Patience."

"Yes, Ma'am."

Making a joking salute, you start to hum along to the radio, thumb caressing across the back of her hand.

She huffs, shaking her head but gives your hand a squeeze anyway.

The drive isn't overly long, no longer than any of the trips you've taken, about forty-five minutes on the road.

You feel like you almost recognise the roads she's taking but a right turn far before anything else comes up on the forested roads throws you a curveball.

Normally you'd been one of the more observant travellers on these roads, however, it seems you'd never paid the tiny dirt road any mind before now.

The greenery, denser than when you'd entered the little driveway, started to part into a small dirt and gravel alcove, to which Katrina pulls in, parking in front a small wooden bollard that lines the alcove.

There's dense green directly in front of you that splits into a small dirt and gravel path which disappears off to the right in a slow curve.

Reaching across the console, she taps your leg with a small grin.

"Hope you brought your hiking legs."

Scoffing, you nudge the woman and basically bounce out of the car in the face of her challenge.

"Damn right I did."

It starts off fairly easy, a basic hiking path for anyone, not much change in altitude but then it starts to increase, and you find yourself falling into the familiar rhythm that you love when it comes to hiking.

If you'd said that to your teenage self, she would've cried at the mention of cardio.

Katrina, it seems, falls into the same familiar feeling, the mild sweat from the hike mixing but also the complete relaxation in her stance as she moves beside you, ahead of you in smaller sections of the path and behind you as you move ahead to crest the more difficult bits first as a precautionary.

It's the first time you really fall into an understanding that someone else gets.

There's a peacefulness to the area surrounding you, bird chimes and occasional cicada chirps as you pass by certain bushes and grass patches.

You think you even spot a small rabbit hopping off the path ahead of you.

Finally, the incline slopes downward again, and then leads down and off to the left, the faint smell of moss and running water becoming more apparent to breathe in, it's refreshing.

"God, I've missed this."

She sounds rightly out of breath as she steps onto a particularly tall rock lodged into the path.

"You've been missing out, then?"

"Far too much, between how cold it got in Sweden and just not really going too far from the city, it's been a good while since I've even gotten to take Harper on smaller hikes."

"Damn, life of an athlete, much?"

A small joking lilt.

"Ha ha."

You can practically see her eye roll from where you're walking in front of the woman.

"It's not that bad, just keeps our lives hectic if anything."

You hum.

"How's Harper feel about that?"

You miss the way her lips curl up at the mention of the mini-mini.

"She loves it if anything, sleepovers with Nonna three times a week and when the international break pops up, she gets to stay with the team and see all twenty-two of her aunties and siblings."

The closer you get to the running water, the less the trees hang over the both of you and the more the suns starts to bead down on your light blue shirt, the warmth very familiar as winter shifts into spring once again.

It's been about an hour or so since you'd started off on the track.

She moves in front of you, turning with a small nod and grin in the direction of the beginning of a large clearing.

"C'mon, we're getting close."

The sun shines through the light brunette hair around the tops and sides of her head that most likely refused to be tied down properly, but in a neat, casual setting.

Slowing to a stop near where she's starting to descend a slightly steeper part of the path, you look out into the opening, a large water not far off to your one o'clock, the green moss abundant around its edges and the dampened ground surrounding the flowing water and the small pool built up around its base.

The pool breaks off into a surpisingly sandy bay that opens into a much larger river, flowing from another path away from you and out into what you see is the beach.

You nearly miss the small misstep as she steps on a mossed up stone, grabbing her arm to stop her falling, alarm on your face.

"Thanks."

"I gotcha."

You nod softly, hand squeezing her bicep, continuing jokingly.

"No hurting yourself, as much as I'd love to carry you back.."

She smacks you a little with a laugh before continuing down a different stone to avoid the same outcome.

"Real funny, Babe."

It's one massive secluded beach and it reminds you heavily of your first tryst together.

Only this time, it's much more private and less accessible, something you can almost appreciate with the nature of it all.

Privacy.

Another understanding between you.

As a public figure and known football player, Katrina knows the feeling well.

It doesn't come often, with media days a regular occurrence and spending near all of her time with teammates, club and country as well as with a two-year-old toddler at all hours of the day.

Of course, she wouldn't trade any of it for the world.

But privacy is a luxury that not even well paid athletes can afford.

So she understands the immediate droop and sigh of contentment when you see the vast empty beach and nothing but the sound of crashing waves and bird song behind you.

Letting your head fall back as you take in the cool summer breeze from the coastline, the smell of sea salt and damp greenery filling your senses, your head turns to look at the shorter woman.

She's already watching you, a small challenging smirk on her face that brings you back to the present.

"...What's up?"

"Nothing, I figured a nice walk and then a rematch would be a great way to start our day together."

"Rematch?... Wait-"

You're cut off as she suddenly pops out a soccer ball from behind her that she'd apparently managed to hide in her backpack the whole way, and tosses it towards you, darting off towards the beach.

"C'mon, I wanna see if you've learned anything yet!"

Jogging after her, you yell out.

"You mean that I'm not the professional footballer in this scenario and that I'm going to get my butt kicked again?"

"I'll make a baller out of you, yet, now get out here!"

It goes on like that for a while, how long exactly, you aren't sure but by the time you both land breathless onto the sand, mainly you, the sun is leaning more towards the other side of the sky.

"I hope you brought snacks, because I'm gonna need them after that last one."

Katrina giggles down at your dead flat form on the ground, chest heaving.

“You can’t give up on me now, to think you were just getting close to beating me.”

The teasing lilt to her voice makes you swat at her ankle lightly.

“Close, my ass. It’s like twenty-six to three.”

“Actually it’s about nineteen to six.”

She kicks you in the foot, tossing up a little sand in the air towards you in the process, landing near your face.

“Hey!”

“Whoops?”

Darting up, surprising yourself you tackle the woman into the soft white sand, landing on top of her.

“That is so not allowed, that was a dirty play ref!”

You call out to the imaginary sideline ref pointing off into the distance with a fake angry face on.

She’s laughing underneath you, almost breathless because of your weight on her stomach, and her hands settle to grip your hips, as you look back down at the woman with a small pout.

“Aw poor baby.”

It’s a little mocking tone that you pout more at.

Poking her tongue out up at you, she sits up slightly to tug you back down towards her, your hands landing either side of her head and you shift to be more level with the woman’s head.

“Hi.”

Grinning once again, you brush your nose against hers.

“Hi.”

A small peck to her lips is all she needs to tug you further down, fully sealing yourselves together, lips locked.

The breeze blows over your back, and the sounds of the waves wash away as you sink fully into the shorter woman, lips sliding across hers.

A new but familiar sensation, becoming accustomed to having the air in your lungs sucked from you every time you kiss her.

Sighing softly into her mouth, you take the opportunity to let your hand wander over the crook of her neck, before shifting to rest over her collar and then over her neck again.

It’s not intentional when you do it, but your thumb almost caresses the column of her throat and it’s her turn to sigh into the kiss.

Pulling away for a small breath, she notes the way your fingers now rest just under her jaw, on her neck, sending shivers through her.

If you noticed it, you don’t say anything, instead diving right back into her, fingers squeezing the skin slightly.

It seems you notice the way she hums into the kiss, a small smirk crossing your face as you let up once more.

The effect you have on her is shown well and truly in the way her cheeks redden and the part in her lips as her eyes open to meet yours.

“Hi.”

A warmth spreads through you at the smile she gives you once more.

“C’mon.”

Nudging you up once more, she pulls herself up, offering you a hand up.

Taking it, you stand close to her still, hands settling on her waist.

“So, what’s next then?”

Her hands grab yours and drag you over to where the bag lies in the sand.

“A little walk and wander and maybe a little bit more of that before dinner, hey?”

Grinning, you tug her towards the bag.

It’s just minutes back on the path that you tug her back into you for more.

You’d say you were someone who had quite the ability for self restraint, especially in previous relationships, but with Katrina, she’s just there, and it makes you want to kiss the daylights out of her every second you’re together.

Inevitably, it takes you both longer on the way back to the car, stopping every ten minutes to admire the scenery in a way only a couple making out against every tree can.

By the fifth time she’s resigned to let you do it every five minutes, more than happily letting the privacy you two have, consume you for the moment.

The way she tugs your neck down herself after an hour of this makes you well aware of the fact she feels the same.

Addicted to the way you taste.

Addicted to the way your lips slide so perfectly on her own.

By the time you get back to the car, you both look more than kiss-mussed, swollen lips, occasional purple marks over your neck when her teeth nipped at the skin.

Like love-sick teenagers.

But not that.

Not yet.

Pressed against the driver-side door, she looks up at you with a look you can’t describe other than pure and utter infatuation.

It makes your heart flip and twist like never before, the fact that someone can look at you like that.

It’s invigorating.

The brunette eventually lets go of you, and you pull back to let her off the car with a very content smile on your lips.

Opening the door for her, you gesture her into the car.

“Shall we go?”

A breathless nod and she’s in the car feeling as giddy as anything.

‘Breathe woman.’

She tells herself.

Settling into the passenger seat after packing the bags into the boot, you buckle in and the whole drive spent going to your next outing is one with clasped hands and small kisses pressed to the back of her hand and wrist.

When you pull up to a familiar club, it makes your heart swell a little.

She’d wanted to come back because the overall ambiance of the place was warm and welcoming and it made her feel comfortable in a place she wouldn’t normally spend any time going to.

Clubs have never been her thing but there was something about this one.

Maybe it was the fact you were involved in it. That it was attached to your first date together.

That would make sense.

You’ve been the deepest breath of fresh air she’s had in a long time. Even with the invigoration of her sport, her work, her home, her daughter. You’re new in her life and it makes her heart feel even more full.

The fact you adore every aspect of her life, her home, her family, makes it all that much better.

The fact that you ask to spend more time with her family without prompting when you both sit down for drinks makes her heart leap.

“Can we do the next one with Harper?”

There's a small sheepish smile on your face.

"It's just been a while since we've all had some time spent together and I miss her-"

Katrina cuts you off with a reassuring smile and a hand on yours.

“I was beginning to wonder when you’d ask again, of course we can, she’s been begging to know when she can see her new friend.”

You smile at the thought.

You had missed the little one quite a bit.

Her wide smile and nearly always happy personality brought so much light into your life that day.

When your drinks are sat down in front of you by a knowingly smirking Aiden.

“Whenever you ladies are ready, I’ve got you queued up with a classic.”

Taking a peek at the ipad in his hands, you see the song and roll your eyes.

It’s one you performed all the time for about three months straight because that’s all people would request from you.

Dragging the woman up with your drinks and a wink at the woman who’s just resigned to the fact she now has to sing every time she’s with you here.

There’s an adoration in her eyes as you step up onto the stage, keeping your eyes locked on hers and speak into the mic with a small wink.

“Hey everyone, we’ve got a good old classic today, it seems I’ve been requested of this one with my duet partner. Everyone thank Aiden for us.”

When the instrumental starts, Katrina half huffs at the song choice, half laughs.

Love Shack by The B-52

You start the song off, letting her get comfortable with the song first.

If you see a faded sign at the side of the road that says "15 miles to the Love Shack"

Love Shack, yeah, yeah I'm heading down the Atlanta highway Looking for the love getaway

Bouncing to the beat slightly, you encourage her to move with you, gesturing down at the second mic that has been slipped into her grasp.

Headed for the love getaway I got me a car, it's as big as a whale And we're headin' on down to the Love Shack I got me a Chrysler, it seats about 20 So hurry up and bring your jukebox money

You almost have to laugh, she's better at this song than most would expect.

In fact, you'd bet she was better than you.

The love shack is a little old place where We can get together Love Shack, baby (the Love Shack, baby) Love Shack, baby, Love Shack Love Shack, baby, Love Shack Love Shack, baby, Love Shack (love, baby, that's where it's at) Love Shack, baby, Love Shack (love, baby, that's where it's at)

The pair of you yelling the chorus into the mic has a few people in the bar up and singing along as well, a few whistles and cheers as the pair of you keep making eye contact with each other.

Sign says (woo), "Stay away, fools" 'Cause love rules at the Love Shack Well, it's set way back in the middle of a field Just a funky old shack and I gotta get back

There's something about the way she dips and kisses you mid song.

You know you're screwed when she pulls you back up and there's a wink thrown your way as she turns to the crowd and starts hopping along to the beat finally, encouraging them to do the same.

You never thought you'd be up here, jamming along with a woman who's been matching your adventurous nature since you've met her.

Despite being someone who has somehow managed to calm your erratic nature, she's also had the more energetic side of her brought out that she normally only sees amongst the kids of the team.

Glitter on the mattress Glitter on the highway Glitter on the front porch Glitter on the highway

There's a small giggle she let's out as you step up and belt out the next verse.

The Love Shack is a little old place where We can get together Love Shack, baby (Love Shack, baby) Love Shack, that's where it's at Love Shack, that's where it's at

You don't miss the small shake of her head when you poke your tongue out between your teeth cheekily at her.

In fact your eyes stay on her for the majority of the song, every movement, every gesture, every expression, every grin while she sings with you.

The sweetest brightest laughter as you both duck off the stage panting is what seals the deal for you.

Her eyes glint with joy up at you and that's when you know she has you hook line and sinker.

-

"So he had to bail you out?!"

"I know right?"

"Babe that is so not-"

"Waitwaitwait before you judge me on it-"

She snorts and covers her mouth at the small glare you give her across the table, having to silence your own laughter to make it hold even a remote amount of sincerity, though she knows otherwise by the quirk in your lips.

Standing, you gesture to the door, wanting to get away from the loudness of the bar for a few moments.

You continue outside into the slowly cooling afternoon air.

"The dude had it coming, he was being way too touchy with this poor girl and security was not doing anything-"

"So you drop him in a trash can after throwing hot sauce in his eyes?!"

"It was well deserved, she was very grateful to not be harassed by that asshole anymore. Besides, the assault charges were dropped when I offered to show them the club footage of him grabbing where he shouldn't"

"Still, you shouldn't have risked going to jail over that-"

"I'd have broken his nose, too, but I literally just had a manicure done finally after like a year of refusing to go, I didn't feel like being made to go back, again."

An amused shake of her head as you both slowly walk down the path to the carpark.

"You're something else."

"That better be a good thing."

She giggles at the half pearl clutch gesture you make in response paired with an offended look.

"Of course it is, babe."

Giving your hand a squeeze, she can only smile at the grumpy look you give her.

"Hush you."

"Or what?"

"Or I might just do something about it."

"Do it."

A beat of silence, your eyes locked on the cocky smirk on her face.

She's baiting you, you know it.

Of course, you take it.

Two steps back towards her.

Three steps pushing her back into the building wall.

One more to find your place pressed against her.

None to press your lips into hers like they'd never separated in the first place.

The small hum she lets out as you do so makes the idea of the very public display suddenly leave your mind, wanting nothing more than to hear more from her.

It's when you pull away gently with a tug and pop that you both pull back a little breathless.

"That works."

She says, eyes still closed, breathing ragged.

You notice a flash of movement, thinking it was a stranger walking by until a small body crashes into the woman in front of you.

"Mummy!"

"Oh my god, Harper what did I say about running off like that? Especially across roads?! You can't do tha-"

A huffing, clearly scared looking Charlie practically sprints around the corner, bent over at the knees.

Her head snaps up at the realisation of who Harper's managed to run into.

"Oh! Mini, Hi!"

The brunette looks a little unimpressed at the blonde.

You get the distinct feeling it's less from the interruption and more the words of the woman who'd just been sprinting after her daughter.

"Charlotte Grant..."

"Wait. Wait. I didn't- She ran off. I promise I was doing everything to chase her down. It was a little road."

Katrina sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose.

The tiny human being attached to her leg looks up at her with an innocent grin on her face.

"Harper, what did we say about running off?"

Picking up the smaller blonde, sitting her on her hip.

Suddenly very sheepish looking like only a toddler can, she looks in your direction in search of something to avoid the conversation.

Of course, with you being you, she does very quickly.

Practically jumping into your arms with excited squeal, the small child latches onto you out of the older woman's arms.

"Y/n/n!"

Giving her a squeeze, a few giggles leaving your lips at the affection from the little girl you hadn't seen in person since that first day, only catching some time talking to the little one over a phone screen.

"Hi Harper, whatcha doin here, huh?"

"Goin to the park."

"Is that right?"

You smile and wave to Charlie with an amused glint in your eye.

The twenty-two year old nods sheepishly.

Looking down at the little one in your arms, you raise a brow in her direction, too.

She nods enthusiastically, her little arms wound tight around your neck as she lays her head on your shoulder.

Katrina watches the exchange between her daughter and yourself with a hardly hidden heart eyes look.

She'd totally forgotten that the park they usually go to is only a couple blocks from where you both were, but it's on the other side.

Raising her brows in Charlie's direction, a small questioning look on her face.

"I can... explain.."

Another pair of footsteps come running around the corner, too, nearly bumping into the blonde, a mop of now very messy wind blown brunette hair.

"Charlie did you get her- oof!"

Nearly ending up in a tangled mess on the floor, Charlie catches the both of them from falling.

"Idiot."

"Hey! You're the one that- Oh hey, Min', we were just- oh."

The mischievous look on Kyra's face that appears at the sight of you.

"That's what you were busy with today. Or who you were busy with."

She wiggles her brows at the older woman.

"I swear, do I need to start leaving you three with Nonna, again?"

Harper's head whips up so fast, you nearly clash heads and you're surprised she doesn't give herself whiplash.

"Nonna? Can we go see Nonna?"

"Sorry Harps', you can see Nonna tomorrow, it's just Kyra and ChaCha for now, alright?"

The little girl pouts for a minute before settling back into your arms.

"Oky, I stay wiv y/n/n, then."

You chuckle at her, before looking up at Katrina.

"Mind going for a walk to the park?"

She sighs softly, before shrugging.

"Alright, why not?"

You pass the little girl back to Charlie, much to her protests.

"One minute Harps, You can hop up again in a bit, I need to talk to mum first alright?"

She pouts before nodding.

You nod at the two to walk ahead, grabbing Katrina's hand softly.

"We can always continue later? You haven't got anything time sensitive?"

She shakes her head no with a small chuckle.

"Just a walk in restaurant, they're open late, though, it'll be fine."

You quirk a brow at her, and she makes the lip-zipping motion.

"C'mon, we've got a little girl waiting."

Wrapping an arm around her shoulders, you both walk slowly behind the group, though quickly get dragged into carrying Harper for the remainder of the walk, still holding hands with the shorter woman beside you.

The pair of twenty-somethings ahead bickering only serves as a reminder of how chaotic this life is for the Footballer, yet it doesn't bother you.

In fact, it feels like something so much bigger for you, something you could get behind.

You don't want to commit yourself so early, but you don't fight the way your heart swells with a little love each and every word you exchange with both Harper and Katrina.

By the time you're both wandering back to the car, late after Kyra and Charlie have left, taking the little one back home to bed.

Late after having sat and eaten and discussed everything from Harper to thousands of kilometres away worlds of a sport you've never found yourself loving before now.

At least now, it seems you've found your favourite people entwined with it.

It's then you find yourself wanting to learn more.

"Hey, I know this is probably something you hear with your work a lot, but just, talk to me about football, anything you want, the rules, the games, anything."

She looks a little surprised that you bring it up, considering you've never personally been a big sports fan, at least, as much as she's known for the past couple weeks.

"I thought you didn't want to know about it?"

"Actually, I want to learn about it, if I'm gonna be showing up to my sister's matches, and maybe get to see you."

You pause, and the last bit is said with a little sheepishness behind it, though you don't miss the way her smile widens at it.

"I wanna know about the game. Or even just your experiences with it. What do you love about it? Tell me anything."

With that, she starts off on where she started with it, how much she loved it as a kid, how she always spent time playing it with her brothers, her time in the academy, in the beginning with the youth team in Mount Gravatt, to her start with the Melbourne Victory and everywhere after.

How she came to Brisbane Roar, her time in the US.

Her injury, her time spent trying to recover. Of course, she's told you the basics of how Harper came to be.

She talks about some of the bigger games she's played.

About the upcoming World Cup in July.

"You should come see us play."

"You'd want me there?"

"Of course I would."

It's said short and almost in an offended tone, but it shows so much more for you.

She wants you there at the biggest stage of her career.

You don't protest it.

"I'll be there, then."

"Good, I would hate to have to pack you into a suitcase to drag you to camp with us instead."

A laugh escapes your lips at that, head tilted back in laughter.

"Of course you would. You're cute. No but seriously, are you sure? I wouldn't be intruding?"

"Hell no, if eighty thousand other people can be there to watch it, why can't you?"

"Fair enough."

You continue like that, laughing, chatting, letting her rant on and on about everything and anything because you could listen to this woman go on and on for hours with no complaint.

Swinging your joined hands as you both wander along the boardwalk she'd taken you to, you look out on the slowly darkening skies over the water.

The colours are as amazing to witness as always, to the point where you both settle on a bench to relax a bit and watch it darken a bit longer.

The sparkle of the fading sun behind you warms your backs as you both settle into each other, the shorter woman contentedly tucked into your side, words starting to slow and you both quieten to enjoy the moment.

"Hey."

"Hm?"

Turning your head to meet her gaze with the tips of her fingers.

"I like you. A lot."

You grin.

"I would hope so. Or this could be really awkward for- hey!"

She smacks your shoulder with a little roll of her eyes.

"Kidding. I really like you, too."

"Too? I only said like not really."

You guffaw at the woman.

"Hey!"

She giggles.

"Okay, I deserved that."

Grinning, you lean down to meet her lips for the what seems like thousandth time today, though, neither of you mind at all.

It's soft, sweet and much less urgent than all of the ones earlier.

It's easy.

You find it easier and easier with each pass to kiss her.

There's a way she spends the time holding your face, caressing the skin of your cheek, that has you in an absolute whirlwind of just... her.

It's invigorating beyond anything.

Yet also, cathartic.

She tastes like home.

And who knows, maybe this is what you've been missing.

The cathartic parts.

A way to calm an already chaotic life.

Sure, she's a professional footballer, that gets chaotic more than a lot of jobs do but it's the way she handles everything. Somehow able to juggle the life of having a child and playing football across the country and internationally when called to.

But to be honest with yourself, there's nowhere you'd rather be than with this somehow new cemented person in your life.

You can't wait to see where this goes.

-

"YOU DIDN'T TELL ME YOU WERE GOING OUT WITH THE KATRINA GORRY!"

"Jesus fucking Christ, Ashley! Chill!"

-------------------

[sailorstar9]

Running Into The Ex-girlfriend At The School Reunion

“Hyoma...” Shika Sotomi, Chigiri's girlfriend for three months, sang. “Let's go together. Aw man, we're gonna be in different classes in 3rd Year. I'm so sad.”

“We're in the same school.” Chigiri reminded, the couple was walking to the Rajitsu Tech soccer club. “We can see each other any time.”

“That's not what I'm trying to say.” Shika pouted. “You're the school's top player, you're gonna go pro when you're older.”

“Sorry, Hyoma.” Shika called out after school some time later. “I promised to hang with a friend today. I can't go home with you.”

“Got it.” Chigiri waved her apologies off and headed off for soccer practice.

“Sorry, I've got a new boyfriend.” Shika called Chigiri out shortly after he tore his ASL. “Let's break up.”

“Boyfriend?” the redhead was taken aback. “You 'have' one, even though we haven't even broken up?”

“Keisuke-kun asked me to go out with me yesterday.” Shika shrugged. “I didn't wanna let him get away because he's got more potential than you. Anyway, now that you're injured, I have no use for you anymore.”

Time passes, in the Manshine City soccer team hostel...

25-year-old Chigiri received an email on his personal laptop, an invitation to the upcoming high school reunion.

After much consideration and discussion with the older Wanima twin, he accepted the invitation.

On the day of the school reunion...

“Chigiri, I didn't think you'll come to things like this, so I'm surprised.” one of Chigiri's former female classmates greeted. “Long time.”

“Listen and be shocked.” Wanima Junichi piped in. “Both Chigiri and myself are players in the Manshine City soccer team.”

“That's amazing.” the women gushed. “I knew you two were great at soccer and I thought you'd become something great.”

“So, are you single now?” one of the braver women pressed. “I'm currently looking for a boyfriend.”

“I also broke up with my boyfriend last year.” another woman added. “Are you free tonight?”

“Hyoma!” Shika called out and everyone turned around.

“I didn't see Sotomi's name on the invite list.” Junichi was confused as everyone took in Shika's rather unstylish outfit.

“I came to see you.” Shika spoke. “I want to talk.”

“We can talk here.” Chigiri stood his ground.

“That's okay.” Shika stammered. “That's great. You're a professional soccer player? You were always great at soccer.”

“How do you know that?” Chigiri asked.

“Junichi-san is always in contact with his younger brother, so I confirmed it with Keisuke-kun." Shika answered. "Hyoma, let's start over.”

“What?” Chigiri echoed in disbelief. “Now, with me? You were the one who said Wanima Keisuke had more potential than me.”

“Sorry, I was wrong.” Shika wailed. “I learned that it means nothing to just have potential in high school.”

“So, it's all about money?” the other women realized that it was all about.

“I didn't say that.” Shika protested.

“Didn't your last boyfriend see you only as an ATM? He made you spend money on him and then tossed you away after he drained you dry and leaving you with all his debt.” a female classmate explained. “Money is indeed important, but it's a little too good to be true to change your mind about a person you made fun of right after they make money.”

“You were saying that?” Junichi snapped. “Now you want to get back together because you have no money. It's too coincidental.” he moved the entire party to another table. “Shika still hasn't gone home yet.” he noticed the lone Shika drinking in the corner. “She hasn't given up on you yet.”

“I'm going to the restroom.” Chigiri excused himself.

“Hyoma.” Shika cornered the speedster outside the men's toilet. “You were in front of everyone else, so you couldn't say how you really felt, right?” she snuggled up to Chigiri. “I know you well. That's why I wanted to talk alone. You still like me, right? I'll go out with you. You've always been relaxed, so your feelings aren't obvious.” she continued, despite Chigiri slapping her off him. “But in high school, I felt that you liked me. You just can't express how you feel, right? It's okay. I get you.”

“I struggle to understand why you think I still like you.” Chigiri retorted. “First of all...”

“Hyo-kun.” F/N called out, a two-year-old toddler in her arms.

“You just came?” Chigiri walked over. “How did you know I was here?”

“Keiichi woke up from his jet-lag and started wailing for his daddy.” F/N replied. “Wanima-kun told me you were in the restroom. And that Satomi-san had chased after you.”

“Hyoma?” Shika splattered, seeing Chigiri's arm around F/N's waist

“I'm already married to F/N.” Chigiri explained. “And as you can see, we have a son.”

“What?” Shika exclaimed. “What's so good about that plain wallflower? I'm... my skin is a little dry right now, but if I go back to my normal lifestyle and work on myself, I'm beautiful. I'm so much better than her.”

“You still talk like that.” Chigiri sighed. “Before she went for that Germany scholarship after I tore my ASL, she made me a senbazuru; there's no way you can beat F/N. She wrote an encouraging quote in each and every origami paper. Also, I don't choose people based on looks. When we were going out, I liked you because you were honest. But, you changed. Those who can only look at people's qualifications will attract the same type. You brought this upon yourself. We're leaving.”

“So cute...” returning the reunion table, all the women cooed over Keiichi. “I knew F/N had all of us beat when she left that senbazuru to Chigiri.”

[my-rose-tinted-glasses]

I got tagged by @avorbl. Thanks, love.

last song:

I was listening to my soundtrack playlist before dinner and this was the last one that played.

favourite colour:

🖤💜

last book i read:

Not a book. But yesterday I started reading the secret relationships manhwa. I'm about a third of the way through, but already I think they're not doing a good job with DaOn's characterisation. Let's see how the rest of it goes.

last movie:

10 Things I Hate About You for the TOL Romcom Rewatch. Asian media has ruined my film watching habits, so I haven't been watching a lot of films in the last year or so.

last tv show:

I just finished FC Soldout before this.

sweet, savoury, or spicy:

All of the above. Since I just had dinner I'm craving something sweet atm.

relationship status:

I have one. Several in fact.

last google search:

Oscar winner list. A conversation with a friend reminded me that I wanted to check out some of the films I missed last year. I need to pick a couple to maybe watch this weekend. Like I said, I've been terrible at keeping up with films.

looking forward to:

This terrible weather to be over. Also this mild flu I'm having. I want spring to start basically.

Let me see who I can tag that I haven’t already annoyed with one of these… @karebear923 @incandescentflower @slayerkitty @dribs-and-drabbles @stuffnonsenseandotherthings @clairedaring @littleragondin of course no pressure! just if you feel like it!💜💜💜

[awesomeapricote]

blog post twooo. electric bungaloo!

hiya, 99.9% of readers won't make it this far, congrats! you have a commendable attention span for reading a 5 min article / blog post and waiting a week for the next and not forgetting!

starting of the week by listening to the sound track of girls band cry... because i well... downloaded the wrong torrent and it was the only music i had downloaded that i wasn't sick and tired of listening to haha. aside from that, i've decided i will actually commit to duoling (lmao let's see how long ts lasts), gohna try do russian, greek (like, advanced to reinforce it) and i'm still deciding on the third language.

why you ask?? awwweee (thas me!) thanks for asking! so kind of my 0.1% oomf to do. gotta find a name to dall you, the reader... still haven't settled on one.

well reinforcing my greek is really a no brainer. i can read, write, understand and converse since little but i've never been really fluent. i wanna change that😝😝😝 apart from duolingo, i guess i have my phone in greek (i do have to switch it to english sometimes if i'm doing something tho... between the really horrendus translations and my sort of limited vocab i have to😞), i am more hesitant to put my laptop in greek tho... since i do like,,, actual important shiz there. anyhow, also read the news 👀

russian is more interesting. greek ih like, real wolrd applications is only really useful for like, well knowing the meanings of scientific words you don't know by their greek roots. sadly, that's about it; truth be said. i guess also since some phrases come out naturally for me in it. anyways, russian! that's more useful.

let's compare populations. russia: 140M, ukraine: 40M, bielorussia: 9M(thought it would be bigger), then all of them (there's A LOT) living abroad. well that culture is lodked behind a translation barrier. if not that, also all the researchQ also think of how well, russia is sort of a global power (in decline) so there's value in it there. apart from culture and literature etc, i guess just general information, forums maybe articles? also obviously chances of finding a friend.

also just, online lot of things are in russian, some just, like, things have russiam text just because they think it looks coond well yeah it'd be nvie tlso know what it means (notable ecamples i can think of: train and cache from cs2, the metro games, and stalker)

not really about learning russian, but a funny thing i'd do with a ukranian friend of mine was, well i tried writing to him in english, but using greek letters and... that sort of failed. then vice versa the same thing happened. butttt we got it working by just implementing a fewnletters from eadh alphwbet and boom we were like, texting by writing on a shared piece of paper in class😝😝 it'd go sort of like this:

ΓΕΪ ΒΡΩ ΠΑΣΣ ΜΕ ΘΕ ΑΝΣΟΥΕΡ ΤΩ ΚΟΥΕΣΤΙΟΝ ΘΡΕΕ

ОКЕЯ УТ'С #ФОР

ΘΑΝΚΣ ΒΡΩ

НО ПРОВЛЕМ

if you don't know either greek alphabet or cyrillic, well... idrk how you can translate that it needs that humnan touch 👉✨👈

anyways, moving onto university. university is lowk stressing me the fuck out. like bro. my ass is gonna be in uni in no time. i was using claude to give me lists of universities that i more than surpass the requirements to with my scores atm, and ngl i thought i'd have to settle but hell nah i guess i had gaslit myself to thinking requirements would be more strict.but looks like things might end uell after all.

i'm probably going to do computer science, from what i've heard ?robably regret it but idk, seems like it could be usefull, hopefully i don't regret it. i'm only really intetested in any uni inside of europe, and had my eyes set on denmark but helsinki and some others in sweeden / germany look interesting👀👀👀

university-wise that's it!

it's monday 02:00 am, just finished your name. lowk underwhelming anime, the beginning was awesome tho. can't fucken stand my face agh i shaved so bad and in a rush yesterday.

oh god. writing this Tuesday 1700H and well. yeah i'm having surgery friday. jeepers creepers i'm low? nervous ash. but it's okay!

hello. you, yes you. you've made it to the technical article-style part. go on, read it, suck all that knowledge inq you've earned it.

okay. what are your thoughts on coronal mass ejections (CME)? they cause geomagnetic storm- FUCK THAT SHIT. i ain't gonna use bs words. coronal mass ejections = solar flare. yes just solar flare. well where i'm going with the solar flares is that, well i'm fascinated by them. weird to think that a solar flare (i might use CME to not be repeating "solar flare" too much but i swear just to avoid repetitiveness) could like, destroy all of our electronics, and essentially send us back to the middle ages. frankly, worse off since we have now become reliant on electronics; even if not directly, indirectly as we rely on civilization law and order. okay, well lemme briefly explain the science behind this just because it's actually pretty cool and interesting soooo here goes nothing!

the sun; this beautiful orb in the sky that makes the world go round. we orbit it like a little duckling, and something crazy like 99% of all ENERGY in our planet, well, comes from the sun! how? well in forms of radiation. for heat to transfer conventionally, there needs to be a conduction medium. when i turn on my radiator in my room (which i love very much) it heats up, and in turn heats up the air around it which heat up the air around the air and so on. the air conducts it poorly (gas) so if i touch the radiator (solid finger --> solid ceramic) there is a faster and more efficient transfer of heat and well; i burn myself! the air around it isn't burning tho. basic thermodynamics yes we all know it trust this'll help you understand this. the sun heats everything up in our planet, that's great! but how?

what is there in space. no actually what is there in space? so we have stars, planets, mooons, asteroids comets which form solar systems, galaxies and ✨the universe💫. now that's phenominal, how they go at break-neck speeds since there's no air for friction. no gas medium for friction. it's just so great since there's NO AIR, NO GAS and NOTHING in between all of these objects so they are completely isolated from each other but wait. hold up. how do we get the heat? well there are two ways heat can transfer, there's conduction (my radiator) and there's radiation (maybe radiator wasn't the best analogy the word might lead to confusion... fuck it yolo). well there's more like convection but you don't need to know about that now (or ever really who tf cares about convection). okay radiation.

//air: 78% nitrogen, 21% oxygen and 1% (carbon dioxide, Argon, water vapour (humidity) and other bullshit gasses)

the sun well, is emmitting loads of radiation, really really strong radiation with a lot of energy. the radiation comes from the nuclear fusion happening inside, now nuclear fusion is a cool topic since it well, we know loads about it but can't for the life of us recreate it. okay well our nukes, our big bombs that are super powerful for their size? they work by... well breaking apart atoms, which releases A LOT of energy, in many ways (radiation (different types), light, heat, kinetic, etc) and this is really cool and all but it's less powerfull than nuclear fusion. nuclear fusion is, instead of breaking apart an atom, you merge two hydrogen atoms for example and form one helium atom. now THAT releases a lot of energy. but to do that, you need insanely high temperatures and crazy high pressure so that's what's happening at the very center of the sun; that's why it's this big hot flaming ball in constant explosions being held in by it's massive gravity, which leads to higher temperatures and pressure and more nuclear fusion. OMG IT'S NEARLY 2AM, and i've only writen the boring part :( i wanna write the fun one :)

okay radiation yada yada, hits us and sun is constantly exploding. sometimes it explodes more than we want it to! that is a solar flare. okay so normally, our magnetic poles will protect us from this terrible radiation, but if it's a big enough solar flare, then there will be a geomagnetic storm (it would also be √ery unlucky if it hits our planet) and it will sort of linger for a while. think greenhouse gasses yk? well yeah and this very strong radiation would:

- make radios useless

- breaks big electronics connected to the grid

this basically happens because the radiation will interact with the earths magnetic field, and, as you should know; where there's an electromagnetic field, there's a current (and vice versa), that's how motors work for example! it'll also probably fuck up all satelites (bye GPS) and uh, probably won't break laptops, phones, or disconnected computers. unless it's a really strong one (like unfathomably strong) and well, then we're sorta fucked.

okay, finaly finally finally. i've been like, sort of obsessed with this for a while. the whole solar flare scenario and - to a lesser degree - other Shit Hits The Fan (SHTF) scenarios. now look i swear i'm not a prepper, but idk i just find it so fun to fantasize and imagine a scenario like this. what would i do? first hour? first 10? first night? first week? long run, months years?

/* writing this next part in the morning of... i'm lowk very tired and lost the train of thought i had last night bear with me :c */

well, i guess the first bit i would be preparing contraptions and packing a bag :'c, there's all the boring stuff like food, water and simple tools or weapons like knives etc but i think i won't go into that. i'm probably gonna go into things that are a bit less conventional. take for example the potassium nitrate in my garden shed. 2kg. potassium nitrate (KNO3) is a very useful fertilizer, but also a strong oxidizer. mix it with sugar at a 60/40 ratio and mix the powder finely and you got little explosives!

the way i see it, there are many things you can't have / make because they're well... illegal as fuck, and for a good reason! but in this scenario those rules no longer really apply. I'd also opt in for some retarded but lowk smart things like i made this pepper spray once well i could just do that again, or put something like bleach in a water gun for :star: self defence :glitter:

/* STORY TIME!

okay so i was with some friends, i was young and dumb and lowk very fucking retarded; then we went to like, an abandoned house we would frequently go to hang out at. and there were these tables and i had some bullshit i brought in my bag (ingredients!). okay well with a mixture of like, some bullshit concentrated capsaicin from these real spicy peppers i made the night before, a little bit of bleach, and other real dumbass disinfectants and vinegar i think? made this faux-pepper spray. and put it in a little spray bottle that used to have disinfectant once upon a time in the covid days. okay well we were like okay this should work, and well, how do we know? we had to test it.

naturally, i volunteer, after cooking this shit up at night in a random countertop at an abandoned like, whole ass building on top floor. we made it with a mix of candle light (i bring candles to most of my hangouts, i just got that swag) and phone flashlights. vibey ash. okay so i spray a big ass spray to my left eye. holy fucking god. i went into it thinking, okay i'm gonna play it cool and be all like damn that was nothing but i just instantly was in fucking AGONY. so fucking painful, tears started fucking squirting the fuck out, and i started mumbling or something? this is what they told me and then i like, fell / collapsed (not violently but like, slowly and in pain yk?) and was like wattererrereererer plesaseseseses watererere and we had water so they were pouring water on my eye and i was like i CAN NOT OPEN IT and they were prying it open but that was very fucking painful. anyhow after 5 minutes it was just a moderate sting that lasted for 30. no eye damage! (made sure the recipe was safe-ish) all in all, very effective, would love to see this in a water gun, actually wait no i take that back.

*/

also i have a few broken (well old enough to not hold any significant charge) car batteries, i'd remove the sulphuric acid (you should know how usefull that is for.. well anything you can do in chemistry that's usefull (okay no everything but most) will need a strong aci'd like sulphuric. also fuck you i'm writin it with "ph" it's accepted. outfit? probably this full military uniform my uncle gave me, like full overals and shit and idk i think it looks dope, plus the fabric is really thick in a way that like, you feel protected. like a dog could attack and the fabric would break the dogs teeth; but in a way that's still comfortable as shit? idk how to explain it. well, i will most definitely write much more on this whole SHTF apocalipse scenario because i absolutely love it, just it's FRIDAY, i've got to do a bunch of workkkk and i don't want to start the big next section (electricity and electronics) without being able to finish it (or rushing it and not ending up going in depth.

so, i think this is gonna wrap it up for today. sorry i'm late in posting this, i've been stuck ash and couldn't really come up with nothing, maybe next week i will go more into depth on the electronics side because that is real cool. like trust, whole wave length modulation, because it's not as easy as plugging solar panels in and boom you have electricity. most inverters rely on the grid for wavelength modulation. then things like setting up mini internets (meshnets?) and radio, telegraphs, hopefully communities, having that technological advantage. i keep more prepper archives than i'd like to admit :( hahah good night. thanks for reading. frankly (is that a frank reference?) this is so fun to write i will be consistent !!!.

ps. the topics i write about, and the topics i've begun writing about for future articles are all sourced from fun, long, and studious DM conversations, where i link up with someone (oomf or irl) and we start fucking ranting and yapping for hours and talk about super interesting shit. i honestly live for that.

what if the lights go out?

i can't stop thihking what i'd do

how i'd reach out to you

keep you safe during the blackout

what if we ate saurkraut?

never had it

sounds germanic

Anne, you're so romantic

let's rp, i'll be the attic

what if the stars fade out?

we'd only get to lay under the moon

the sparks at night won't flicker

we'd be left alone outside with just the liquor

what if our flame dies out?

i guess that would be okay

five and a half liters just gotta spill three

129 bpm, chest aches

40mmHg, fading fast

hypovolemic shock bring me peace.

//photodump of da week (lacks a little mb)

[nathank77]

8/29/24

3:28 p.m

I don't know if I should take the antibiotics... the symptoms started last night. I schedule an appt and this morning I woke up feeling almost normal.

I went in got traumatized of course. And they found blood but nothing else was abnormal but the testing for the bacteria takes a few days.......

Like I said before my bloodwork came back not great. Suggesting potentially kidney disease. Which could be the cause of the burning sensation....

Frequent urination cannot be a symptom bc I always frequently urinate. ALWAYS.

I noticed my twitching muscle seems to be most prevalent in my right eyebrow..... which concerns me.... I contacted my dr..

Unfortunately yesterday I had 4 eggs... which is high in b9.... my b9 level was low but not significantly..... but the eggs could have taken a very low level and made it almost normal...

I haven't eaten a chicken in 2 weeks until today bc of money... I've noticed the twitching everywhere started with metopolol including my right eyebrow....

Most of my muscular twitching had stopped within 2 or 3 days of stopping metopolol...... but my right eyebrow happens a couple times a day... it could be b9 being low...

It could be a nerve with a blood vessel and I have messed up blood levels suggesting thick blood.

Also my blood revealed like, a lot of cholesterol problems.... all of those levels are fucked...

I'm wondering what is going on with my right eyebrow. The rest of the twitching was spread out... I'm worried about it.

Idk if I'm making the right decision not taking the antibiotics atm.

I feel I'm making the right decision continuing to take White mulberries.... as my levels were so fucked and she was drawing a lot of blood based on my muscular twitching... so that could explain it.

When I think about it the eyebrow thing started with metopolol... but didn't stop. I might have been significantly deficient with b9 before the eggs yesterday especially since it started with I wasn't eating chicken which does have some b9 in it.

I got to schedule another appt with her.

I'm worried about it. I'm worried about all of it. I don't really think white mulberries have anything to do with it. When I told her about them she was like I really don't think they are playing in role in it, it sounds like a b vitamin issue.

When you read about muscle twitching, it can be a blood vessel against a nerve.... and my forehead since the statin feels like blood flow.. my blood is thicker than it should be that much is confirmed.

I wish I could find a solution. I don't like that the twitching is localized to my eyebrow... basically you know bc it's my face.

I don't like the idea of taking a medication for my potential uti without knowing for sure it's a uti... bc..... I have mrsa...

They rarely give out antibiotics to people with mrsa bc eventually we build a resistance to them and once that happens, it's IV antibiotics.....and then death....

So I only take antibiotics when I really feel I need to.

I'm really overwhelmed atm. I took zyrtec out of my diet about 5 days ago... to see if Hydroxyzine will help with my allergies without it and I haven't needed it.

Idk what to do. I'm scared and I feel really violated by the, "dr." And I'm still waiting on more bloodwork...

I hope my PCP will see me in a week or so once we get the rest of the bloodwork. I want to explain to her everything I said about the eggs/chicken... although I find it to be weird that the muscle twitching is localized.

[tjsplace]

aug 26

4.55 pm

i can't stop listening to the same ep over and over again today. boy by luke hemmings. it fits the mood. i haven't been super depressed, but i've been sick with a cold. it's super annoying and of course because of my fibromyalgia, it hurts me more than other people. but whatever. today therapy was rough though. i made the exercise of recalling all the traumatizing events that led to my first suicide attempt. i cried, so much. it felt like i had a whirlwind inside my head and i couldn't see clearly. i felt like a horse with blinkers. yesterday i was sad because i felt like a failure in my career. my mom told me over and over again i'm talented. i wanna believe her. but what if i'm not? what if i'm not all the things she says i am? i'm not obsessive with music production. am i? i literally have no idea. it's because i spend maybe 1 to 2 hours a day on ableton. sometimes. a few times a week. sometimes every day. it depends on what i have to do. but i don't know, it doesn't feel like a hobby yet. it feels like work. because i'm not talented enough to not get frustrated when my songs don't work. it's the sounds, the mix. structurally i'm good. lyrically, eh. maybe. i don't play guitar super well because i don't practice enough. it's my stupid hand injury from two years ago. i gotta warm up every single time i gotta pick up a guitar, for ten minutes. it's annoying. i just wanna listen to music. today, right now, i'm sick and i'm high. i bought two grams. i hadn't bought any weed in over a week. maybe therapy today was too tough for me. also, it was online. i couldn't bring myself to my therapist's office. too tired. too much snot. i wanna write about leon and salem, but mar hasn't given me permission to write salem yet. i don't wanna overstep her boundaries. i know it's her character. i didn't create it, she did. i wish i could write her in a way that made mar proud. a version of a similar salem maybe. my own perspective on salem. maybe i should tell her that.

6.24 pm

i'm so overwhelmed with emotion right now. listening to i'm still your boy feels surreal when i'm high and watching videos from california. being at the beachwood café. laurel canyon. west hollywood. when i went to the recording studios. westlake, eastwest, sunset sound and henson. they all said i needed an appointment to check out the place if i was planning on recording there. i was like, i'm from chile, this is my last day here, i can't make an appointment. i said only half of that. i went to do that too late. but i couldn't do it the other day, when we went to disneyland and i had a panic attack. i went back to the inn, took a shower, went to an atm in a grocery store, bought a joint. got high, took a nap and went to visit inglewood. it was really cool. then i went to buy makeup at ulta beauty in west hollywood. maybe i should do yoga, i'm all contractured. my neck, my back. i haven't done yoga in ages. my mat is probably all dirty. i'm sick. why do i want to do things that are good for me just when i'm sick? like, what the fuck.

6.52 pm

i'm getting anxious now. i know it when i feel like i absolutely must talk to someone, tell them everything, otherwise i'll lose my mind. i don't know if i got into a fight with mar. shit. maybe i shouldn't have written her long messages explaining why i thought writing about leon and salem would be a good idea. and that i understand if she doesn't want me writing salem in any way. which is totally valid. and now she's not replying, she's most likely busy, and i NEED to talk this out with someone.

[snowmuttgetsweird]

8/9/24, morning

Roommate comes home today I'm so relieeeeeved

It's boring and lonely without him. Just feels like a massive bleak void in my life when he's not here. I'm bored he's not here, I'm lonely, I'm anxious I can't see him, and I get stir-crazy and lost and don't really know how to conduct myself. I would just be standing around thinking about what I should do and then end up doing push-ups or something just to work out some nervous energy.

In the meantime I picked up a handful of groceries yesterday to make sure I can make a nice brunch for him when he arrives, including a couple 5lb bags of rice. I washed out an empty 30lb bucket of cat litter cause it already has a lid and a handle and it seems to work just fine as a rice bucket- not for food storage but as a workout device.

Gave it a shot- get very much covered in rice starch, and the workout is definitely exhausting. Theoretically, it helps strengthen all the micro muscles in your forearms to help protect you from carpal tunnel, tennis elbow, etc; really good for keyboard warriors, artists, heavy lifters- pretty much anyone that uses their hands and fingers for a lot of strenuous or continuous activity. If nothing else, it sure does a hell of a job exfoliating my hands lol. Maybe this will finally fix my fucked up cuticles. Prolly gonna start wearing a mask while using the bucket though- I dunno how much dust it kicks up but I'd hate to develop a rice allergy this way.

Pretty disappointed I couldn't pick up that Gallantmon stuff the other day, but really I should have tempered my expectations more. I'm not as hung up on it now- I'll get it eventually, I just hate waiting for it to happen.

Dunno if I mentioned already, but I started taking metamucil too. I'm not a big milk drinker, but overnight oats and protein shakes and cottage cheese have me consuming a lot more dairy than I usually do, and diets with a lot of meat and dairy tend to cause GI issues, so I figured the extra fiber would probably be a good idea while on a high protein diet. The first few days suck- not particularly painful or uncomfortable, but really gassy, which is just kinda embarrassing and annoying to deal with. It passes after the first three or four days though, and I DO notice that I seem to have more consistent BMs, feel less bloated, less gassy, and a bit lighter. My appetite means I'm trying to pack as much protein into as little actual food as possible too given how hard it is to eat as much as I'm expected to, so I'm actually overeating a lot less, which also probably helps.

That said, I haven't been particularly strict on myself about food- more for philosophical reasons than anything. The goal is just to get the protein I need, and nothing else really matters atm. There's no point in eating anything I don't enjoy, and any goal that's completely miserable to achieve is phyrric. As long as I'm getting my protein and I'm lifting to the end of my sets every time while steadily increasing the weight I lift, I WILL build muscle, and those muscles will burn more calories, which will result in weight loss. As long as I stay on top of it at least 3 times a week (ideally more, but 3 is my bare minimum atm) and don't eat a GROSS excess of calories, all I need otherwise is trust, time, discipline, and patience- all things my ADHD-addled brain struggles with, lol.

I haven't been to the gym the last three days. Skipped one day cause I got home especially late and I was wiped, skipped the next cause I was depressed, skipped last night cause a bit of time-blindness had me going out to the grocery store pretty late at night, etc, so this week has been pretty bad for gym-going, but I'm gonna get back on it. Maybe not tonight cause I close at work and my roommate is finally back home- which does mean I'll be cooking dinner for both of us when I get back- but tomorrow I'm getting back into it with a vengeance.

Wish me luck.

[silly-plays-p3r]

so since you're up to ryoji, any conclusive thoughts on the new vas, if any?

I'm not that far. He only just showed up and I got one rank in.

.....Let's just say shit hit the fan for me on Thursday and I've gotten REALLY busy....ummmm.....fixing it so I can get back to my normal routine? Is that the best way to describe it (I still have stuff to do, but I'm not longer in "emergency mode")? I haven't picked up any game stuff since then (I literally passed out yesterday night cause I was so tired jfkldsjf). (oh wait, I'm so out of it I misread it as only asking about Ryoji....lol, well I'm talking about him first I guess, )

Going off the one interaction....... Yuri. I prefer Yuri. I already preferred Yuri's Pharos to Aleks' Pharos. I like both as MC.

There's something about Yuri's........Between OG/FES/P and the manga...... But Aleks' Ryoji feels more like it fits the P3 movies (same with Ikutsuki tbh). There's something about THAT portrayal of Ryoji that hits different compared to the other's.

THAT BEING SAID. I'll take Aleks. BUT ONLY if that means we can have Yosuke going back to not sounding as squeaky. TT0TT I can handle Adachi's voice change (feels like he decided to put on a more deranged mask). But Yosuke I want him back to sounding chiller. orz

Oh right, other chars fjdsakfja

Um....Aki's ok. I don't mind him. There's something about Liam's voice I prefer BUT, I wouldn't mind the new guy coming back.

Junpei is good (both in general and as a replacement). Keep him (if I have to deal with Junpei again that is)

Mitsu is good. I prefer Tara tho. Nothing against the new girlie, Tara's just one of my fav VAs. (the other VAs I like are Naoto's OG, Laura Bailey, Lily Vonnegut, Jamie Marchi, Kristen Bell, David Gallagher, and KH1!Haley Joel Osment, Santino Fontana...something about their cadence makes my brain go brrrrr but like for diff reasons)

Speaking of Brrrr, I really like Yuko's and Shinji's a lot.

Both old and new Shinji are great. Love them.

Love the new Ken. I never hated his OG, and Cindy did a good job too. But the new one is really good.

Fuuka......she's cute (I'm more annoyed that they didn't add to her at all so far :'D thanks atlus). I miss the OG one. Wendee Lee did great too (she always sounded like a higher pitched ver of the OG to me).

I think I liked both Natsuki's VAs? I do miss the old one. I can't recall the new one's voice atm TT0TT

Koro is fine lol

I don't like Takaya's new VA. I like the old one give him back.

I think I like this Chidori VA more? I didn't mind the old one. (also Chidori run, stay away from Junpei TT0TT)

Jin.........I think I like him more?

Ikutsuki. Prefer the old one. New one would be good for the movie ver tho!

I miss the old Igor. Gimme back Dan Woren you cucks! TT0TT Kirk is fine but I want Dan back! (wait Dan is Byakuya from Bleach???? Gimme him back! TT0TT)

Aigis is better. I didn't mind the old one, but this was an improvement.

All the VAs for the SLs are great so far tbh (haven't done Moon yet, not cause I don't want to, but because it's optimal if I wait)

Yukari is................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................her directing is.......................her direction.....the way the director is directing her...........................................................................................................I hope the VA does well in other works. She can come back as a diff character tbh. "So you'd rather have Ruff come back?" Or Yukari can just....not come back as a character. :"D

I think the thing that irks me about the new voices are.......the new voices for the already existing secondary/background chars (chars who were never voiced before? no problem). I. DON'T. LIKE. THEM.

"Oh but it's cool to hear!" or "We need Yuri to still get a check" I don't care. I don't like it. It's weird. It's weird hearing P3MC's voice coming out of Yukari's dad ("oh like Aki's is any better?" AKI ISN'T A LOVE INTEREST FOR YUKARI OUTSIDE HC! TT0TT)

I hate that they swapped Mitsu's dad and Kurosawa. Did they eat? Yea, they did great. Does it bother me because I find it COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY???? YESSSS!

My 9/11 is the damn principal's voice being changed. oh my god, it's not the same. He was so perfect in the OG, he was bumbling it just.....god it worked. The new guy.....doesn't give the same doddering vibe. man orz (I know most people are coming for the new Aki guy, or someone else, but man I'm very annoyed by the NPCs being changed orz)

I think one of THE BIGGEST issues I have with them just....redubbing the whole damn thing is (MORE SO the side NPCs than the main cast).....just how costly that must've been. Like stupidly costly, like they didn't need to do it. It was just wasting money kinda costly. Like they coulda used that money for something else, like I dunno....PUTTING THE FUCKING ANSWER AND FEMC IN????? >_> *inhales* I know I know I KNOW. Before you say it. Before my lil strawman I talk to in my head says it. The english localization's funds were probs separate from the JPN devs funds. I mean, unless Atlus JPN controls Atlus USA's funding directly, and thus have more direct involvement. I mean, haha, that'd make sense. Haha, but if I was them, and that was true, I wouldn't let other people know that. haha

Apollo: *compels Midori for no reason tomorrow* Midori: The localization funds were actually allocated and tied to the JPN funds. It wasn't just SEGA USA that decided to replace all the actors, it was also SEGA Japan. Me: I'm at my limit is2g

They probs would've saved a lot more money from just....keeping most of the OG voices (maybe replace Vic). And then maybe dub all the SLs/additional side content.

Ummmm.....tldr; Liked some, loved some, was eh on others, hated the existing side NPCs got new voices. All in all I think it was probs a waste of money tbh. Don't do it again for the inevitable P4 remake. (P1/2? sure there's not a lot of dubbing in that one anyways)

[yourstrqly]

★ . . . 𝐃𝐑𝐎𝐖𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐈𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄, 𝐋𝐇𝟒𝟒

pairing: lewis hamilton x (former!)british!royal!reader (fc: keira knightley)

in which f1 royalty lewis hamiltons new girlfriend, who isn't a part of the royal british family anymore, hard launches their romance on instagram, shocking the community.

authors note: can anyone motivate me to write ? I've got no ideas atm :(

rina's masterlist

liked by danielriccardo, emiliaclarke and others

y/nwindsorhamilton morning lovely people, i'm supporting my man at the hungarian gp, and i do hope to see plenty of you! 🕊

lewishamilton glad to have you by my side, angel🤍

y/nwindsorhamilton wouldn't have it any other way darling!! lewlewham WHAT IN THE MF HELL IS HAPPENING??

valtteriebottas see you later y/n!

y/nwindsorhamilton of course val, haven't seen you in ages lewishamilton you've seen him literally last weekend? y/nwindsorhamilton as I said "ages" alexalbon yeah lewis don't gate keep y/n, she clearly misses us :( y/nwindsorhamilton sure do, alex! lily and i are planning a lunch date when we're back in england, how about that? 💫 alexalbon fantastic idea ✌🏼

liked by maxverstappen, dualipa and others

y/nwindsorhamilton thank you for welcoming me with open arms lovelies, I had an absolute blast even though lewis didn't get on the podium. To the fans who trusted me with their gifts for lewis: he says thanks to everyone and sends his love to you!! see you soon 🤙🏻

mickschumacher merc definitely had missed your presence y/n. loved to see you 😊

y/nwindsorhamilton ah mick you're totally right (but don't tell toto). had fun & can't wait to see you on thursday lewishams whats next thursday??

cocoloveslewis thank you again y/n for everything, you're such an angel 😭

y/nwindsorhamilton no worries dear everyone would've done that. checochecked nah she's so naive, ma'am you're THE wag, most ignore us like the pest. the people's princess for real🤚🏻

liked by codygakpo, landonorris, lilymhe and others

lewishamilton two years ago I've met my other half, you, and after the most romantic, emotional six months we've bared ourselves in front of god, promising to love and cherish each other till death. now our love is growing into a tiny human being — y/n, you know I'll always love you and our little family endlessly, thank you for turning your life 180 just for me 🤎

ps: sending love to your grandma; without her matchmaking we wouldn't be where we are now!

sebastianvettel you're both disgustingly sweet 😔 congratulations on your baby and the anniversary! Still remember the wedding like it was yesterday

liked by y/nwindsorhamilton, lewishamilton lancestroll when are you telling me about it? It has to be the most iconic wedding of f1, the snippets dont give enough away 😤 kimimatiasraikkonen some stories are only for the right people boy landonorris im still in disbelief that I wasn't invited but kimi, seb and mick were alexalbon sucks to be mate, I was there ;) landonorris WHAT? HOW? y/nwindsorhamilton lando, I couldn't not invite alex and lily, I practically adopted them when I was at my first race landonorris traitor landonorris who else was invited from the grid? lewishamilton do you really want to know that lan? landonorris can't be that bad, right? y/nwindsorhamilton you decide my dear :) i'll call you later

y/nwindsorhamilton I wouldn't have it any other way, lewis. I love you now and later, next life and a lifetime beforehand. thank you for giving me a family after I lost them 🤍

lewishamilton you, my love, hold my whole world within you

vcruelsummer soooo i gathered this: she doesn't have children out of wedlock but she left the royal family for lewis with permission of her late grandparents who also played matchmaker between them (original shippers). mAd

[lets-talk-spirituality]

I found these but these aren’t readings. I remember one reading where I felt someone strongly was a starseed and I said to message me about it. Maybe that was you. It was awhile ago I feel.

I looked up and yes except maybe the 3rd one? It might have been me or someone else we all type similarly in here, but I do agree that I cannot do it as well. I am also sure that I've sent more or that I remember I sent more ? Not so suree... since I couldn't even find these. 🥲 One reading you've done or they did on you? Do you feel that from me atm (I think you may not because it's not strong or I haven't guessed anything?) Idk. I haven't seen any of these replies before (I mentioned it yesterday) thus I also didn't see possibly you're saying message me, to me potentially. Maybe! if you can find which one you're referring to maybe I can tell?

Is tulip available for sure? it just struck me that someone was using it here 😭 if it is I'll pick another! Got longer than I expected <3

Honestly, I need to do a deep dive through the blog at some point soon. Like I need to organize my tags and all that jazz. I need to find that reading because it’s kinda bothering me because I remember it so specifically and I’m wondering if it is the one you’re thinking of too. So I’ll look! And yes tulip is available so you can have that.

[juiceastronaut]

Idk if this will actually help anyone but I want to throw this into the water after seeing so many motivational things to get people working out and moving that never worked for me until I just started Doing something else. I thought maybe this might help someone.

Don't push yourself. At least not at first.

I did track for two years (really one year but shh) and constantly from my coaches I'd hear "Push yourself until you don't think you can go any further, then push yourself some more!" And I disliked being uncomfortable to put it simply, but I'd always felt like it was a flaw of mine that I couldn't take it any further, that I didn't want to.

Then, when I got older and I would try to start working out again, the regimens of "Do x amount of cardio then lift weights x amount of times ten reps three sets then do more cardio" stuck with me pretty hard. Which would mean I'd only go to the gym for maybe a week, because I'd burn myself out quickly trying to exercise the "right" way (plus my social anxiety of going to the gym lmao). Then start hating myself that I didn't have the "fortitude" to keep going. Because another thing I'd also hear is that "You can't rely on motivation you have to make yourself do it anyway."

And idk if it's the (undiagnosed) ADHD talking, but that seemed so counter intuitive I questioned the sanity of the people who said it. What do you mean you just *do* it, even when you don't want to?

But all that changed when I realized, I can do whatever I wanted? Don't get me wrong, if there's specific results you want then obviously specific workouts can help you achieve that. But since a lot of people go to the gym to "lose weight" there's this push to go as long as as hard as possible to "burn the calories" and to somehow makeup for all the times you haven't been at the gym.

But that doesn't breed a habit of working out, for actual health reasons like how general movement is good for you. That's a cycle of self-hatred and supposedly "working on yourself" that you will ultimately lose motivation for, because you're burning yourself out by working out for two hours everyday with no rest. Then hate yourself that you were too "lazy" to keep going. Then because you pushed yourself to the brink of passing out you think exercise is just bad and awful.

When I started just, moving, using a cardio machine until it felt boring or it started hurting in not a good way I just got off, then started lifting some weights. Or even just take a break. I didn't *need* to do anything. I stopped keeping track of how long I was running, even for how long I was working out. I measure it by how many podcast episodes I listen to (My whole workout is about two podcasts atm). I just did whatever I wanted, whatever felt right in the moment, and I've been working out probably the most consistently I've had my entire life.

I'm not saying that it's not going to be hard starting out, but I'm also saying that the people who say working out feels good aren't as crazy as you think. It *does* feel good as long as you're not pushing yourself too hard too quickly. Your body will tell you when it's ready to up the pressure. It's not a beast you need to overcome, you need to work with it. If it's telling you to take a break then take a break, the next day you'll find you went a little farther than you did yesterday, and then you go from there.

[candlespages]

So, got around to finishing the first Season (ST : Discovery) yesterday for the first time ;) Here are a few thoughts:

-I knew Lorca was a right bastard! I knew he'd left Cornwell there on purpose, and his lack of emotion after Landry 1's death makes much more sense! I could feel that he'd done sth fishy when the coordinates were inputted from his chair, and the way he wanted to have everything be the same as in the Mirror Universe, and all... dude was obviously trying to get sth, to delay the Discovery's return, and it feels strange that nobody thought to call him out on it?

-I am ambivalent about the emperor, I expect we haven't seen the last of her, that's certain.

-Cornwell being ready to commit genocide stroke me as... human, I guess, not right, not correct or anything, but she rationalized it like a human would, is what I mean? (to be clear, I think it's a horrible, frankly frightening and disgusting decision, but I expcet part of it is because it would be so easy to become that person? so kudos to ST: Disco to make us aware and reflect upon our dark side)

-Sarek and the other admirals participating and advocating/agreeing with this decision is... WTF??? No! Wat?! so I get that some might agree with it, heck, probably some might have been advocating or planning sth like this for a while, but all of them? Sarek too? That I can't believe

-Amanda just there to be there atm 🙄 it feels like she's even more background than in TOS/ST: IV and since I'm sure she must also have had an influence on Michael growing up, it feels ... weird. Like she's not even IN the picture, not properly at any rate (i don't think I'm expressing my thoughts properly there ^^')

-Wondering about Main Universe Lorca, then, what happened? Is he dead? When did the other one arrive, etc., were he and Cornwell together together or were they just hooking up, or exes who do, ...?

-L'Rell, want to see more of her, even though her character arc left a strange aftertaste... It felt like she was more interesting before her captivity on the Discovery. BTW, I get leaving her on the Discovey for plot reasons but it doesn't really make sense for in-universe (for me at least). The way L'Rell unifies the Klingons feels a bit deus ex machina, too, where are the actual Klingon political games? They're an actual society! They have laws and customs, etc.... the way it is portrayed feels more like "ok, we need to have an end to the war in 5 minutes at the end of ep 15, people, any ideas?" than sth actually well build from the start? No shade being thrown here, just a feeling that it was weird to me... (also the Klingon's heads? Still not over that new design)

-Now, we come to the thing w/ Ash/Voq. It's... weird. And not sth I would expect from Klingons from all I've seen of them in the franchise. Sleeper agents? Feels a lot more Romulan than Klingon to me, them being all about honour and stuff. Though I guess there is also the angle of them being more a destructive force attacking everything and anything instead of being unified. So... Idk, it's strange. Also, I can't even imagine the trauma, and the pain, and everything Voq/Ash must be going through, and the "solution" was also a bit... expedient? Idk man, this whole thing felt weird, though. I am not sure whether Michael's feelings on the matter were properly adressed either? And why do those ships not have a therapist on board, JFC! I wouldn't have wanted more agony, it's simply that the season didn't leave much time to adress everything in that situation, and I wish it could have taken it. Anyhow, the whole situation was strange, and I wish they hadn't gone to that angle.

-They killed CULBER!! Those bastards killed CULBER!! You know sth is going to end up badly for one of the characters when you only start to get to know them with their partner being in a critical state. That kiss before the 133 jumps broke me, btw... not sure I said anything about it before (?) We started to discover more about Stamets too in the eps just before, and... to have Culber be killed that easily? let's just say I hope he's gonna do us a Harry Kim ^^' I don't want to have a heartbroken Stamets, poor bean doesn't deserve that

-Saru makes for a competent AC, and I hope he ends up on that Captain's chair.

-Good dev for Tilly, nice to see her coming into her own

-Michael's dev was... Idk, some of the things made sense (like her not being over her guilt for what happened to Georgiou, not that she's actually the one who started the war or was responsible for her death, or why she was still torn about her "betrayal" of her Captain), some of the things felt... forced. The "bond" between her and Lorca, for example, which wasn't sth I could feel before, and suddenly, he makes her believe things, and she or Saru should have called him out, but maybe we can put that on the stress she was under. Her meeting with the Emperor felt also slightly gratuitous, like she's there to bring a Georgiou back in the original universe, or sth. There was a lot of good, though, ngl. Her reinstatement is merited, though I'm not sure I'd have made her a Commander right away. I don't know what to think about her command style yet, because we haven't seen much of it. Her relationship with Sarek, with Ash, with Georgiou, with Saru, all of these are a mess (and not necessarily her fault, I mean the whole thing with Ash is a mess anyway, and not of her own making, poor bean), and she needs medical leave and therapy, at least therapy anyway. Though, that Nature VS Nurture thing we could see in the Mirror Universe when she was talking w/ Georgiou, yes! here for it!

Now, some general feedback on the series itself (keeping in mind that I've only seen the first season, here, so maybe some things will make sense later on)

-Why create a war with the Klingons, though? It makes sense as a way to create interest over the story, and to catch the attention of the potential audience, but still... I don't really like things added to the lore a posteriori, b/c it makes for chaotic in-universe history (and I need my history to be "linear")

-Starfleet tech feels inconsistent, even with TNG/DS9/VOY :

->holographic communication? a way to have a three-way call? we're in 2256! that's before Kirk's era, my guys! it's not supposed to be possible yet!

->a kind of "holodeck" simulation? it was presented as a "new thing" on the first TNG ep! (more than 100 years in the future)

->the lack of technical technobabble still bothers me. A "time-crystal"? ^^'

->Those jumps, they're going to have to explain them to me, in the context of TNG being outfitted with a brand new warp engine that enables them to go aroung to WARP 9.5 (forgot the exact number), jump tech being inexistant in SF in VOY, and also... just why create sth that they are going to have to destroy for it to make sense in the later in-universe history?

-Again, that new Klingon design *shudder*, even down to their clothes, and the Vulcan clothing seems dark for no reason

-Love all the little sound effects ref to TOS, and the data "solids" refs too ;)

-Loved the updated TOS theme song at the end ;)

-again, DISCOVERY theme song is great !

-The uniforms are great! Though we can't see who the red shirts are now xD

-love the ensemble cast, great characters! great dev atm, can't wait to see more!

-interesting Story Arc so far, even if I'm not a fan of everything! Want more of that episodical feel added to it, too, but can't wait to *discover* more (see what I did there? ;) )

-Asks some good questions and makes you reflect on some intersting things, but I would love to see more allegories and philosophy

-Again that thing with Sarek... just ... I see why you would do it, to make us more interested/invested in Michael, but she's actually interesting enough a character *without*, and it feels forced.

-Will probably start Season 2 next week ;) Because even though there are things I'm not happy about/not a fan of, I liked it a lot still, and the series offers a lot of possibilities for future storylines, and I'm here for it!

-Love the diversity! Could always be more, and expecting there shall be more! Hoping we get an alien captain too ;) (rooting for Saru to get that promotion!)

-Let them install a therapist on that ship, for Somebody's sake ! ^^'

In Conclusion, good series so far, want to see more!

[ncwhereman]

secret santa again :) this feels like pen pals

the long answer is great, i love hearing how people got into their favourite artists :') i also really love the beatles and got into them kinda the same way as you - i wasn't interested for a long time/thought they were boring and overrated, until i saw get back and realised they were funny, inspiring, and deeply talented (to name a few things) and like you i was obsessed after that! before get back i'd only heard their early/overplayed stuff, but listening to post-rubber soul era showed me how good they are. i was the same as you and listened to nowhere man for ages thinking this song is doing something to me, but i think listening to them makes life a lot better.

you really have great taste in music :-)) im also stuck in the 60s-70s side of classic rock, mainly late 60s-early 70s, apart from the beatles it's a lot of the rolling stones, the who, led zeppelin, jimi hendrix and fleetwood mac. also lana ♥♥ i had a lana phase right before i got into classic rock! i saw you said you're listening to marianne faithfull and cilla black - could you recommend some songs to listen to?

and apart from music really being my main interest atm (help) i also love cooking, baking and hiking, and i collect stuff like records and film cameras :') what other hobbies do you have?

sorry this turned into an essay! have a wonderful day 🎅 -srs

hi! no worries, i love getting long answers too!

so we have pretty similar taste in music! i'd love some recs on all five you listed, but i can say i love films based on the who's tommy and quadrophenia, and my favorite songs by the stones must be paint it black (i think i listened to it even way before yesterday lmao) and ruby tuesday! and i'm not too familiar with the others- i only watched a part of led zeppelin's the song remains the same when i caught it on tv, and a jimi hendrix live.

i haven't listened to much of cilla and marianne yet tbh 😭 you might know these songs already bc they're pretty popular, but i can totally recommend anyone who had a heart and love of the loved (it's a lennon-mccartney!) by cilla. marianne has covers of john's isolation and harry nilsson's don't forget me, and also as tears go by, written by keith richards and mick jagger! there's also a hullabaloo episode where marianne sings it, presented and inteviewed by eppy 😭

oh i love collecting too! ever since i got into classic rock and discovered local record shops that hardly have anything besides classic rock i'm very much into vinyl! got my latest one just today. i also draw, try writing things but not too successfully, and my biggest interest besides music must be films! (so collecting film cameras sounds super fun!!!) atm i'm into 30-70s movies mostly.

since your main interest is music, do you play any instruments? i tried to learn piano but i fail miserably every time 😭 what are your favorite films? and to get back (pun intended) to the beatles, what are your favorite albums/songs by them?

[wickedhawtwexler]

sorry i keep bitching on this website my life is lowkey a disaster at the moment but it's fine we're fine everything is f i n e <3

so my labmate and i met almost a month ago to talk about our manuscript. we each gave ourselves a to-do list. i have ONE task i am still working on. he has done NOTHING. but HE keeps texting ME asking when ***I*** am going to be done??? UMMMM WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO BE DONE!!!!! last week he went into our lab meeting and was like "oh i'm just waiting for morgan to be done" WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR ME YOU HAVE 3/3 THINGS (that YOU ASSIGNED YOURSELF TO DO i didn't FORCE THIS on you YOU LITERALLY SAID YOU WANTED TO DO THEM!!!!!!) LEFT TO DO AND ABSOLUTELY NONE OF THEM REQUIRE MY INPUT!!!!!!!!!!!!

i ignored him and kept working on my shit because whatever asshole, i'm going to finish my things and then our advisor can look at our document and see YOUR list of undone shit and see that ***I*** have not been the problem.

and again, as of this afternoon i have ONE (1) task left and it's almost done and i was feeling pretty good about it. buuuut then i joined our lab zoom meeting, saw that he had texted me again (late yesterday, i had my phone on do not disturb so i just saw it) blaming ME for this manuscript not being done saying that our advisor was upset and i just fucking snapped y'all. my soul just left my fucking body because i am so FED UP!!! QUIT BLAMING ME!!!! I will admit I'm working slowly but YOU ARE NOT WORKING ON THIS AT ALL!!!! I know you haven't even LOOKED at the manuscript since our meeting last month because you would SEE how much I have done and you would know that YOU STILL HAVE SHIT TO DO!!!!!

y'all i have not had a panic attack since literally like june or july (shoutout to therapy and adderall <3) but i could feel one starting because this is literally just so frustrating!!! like i am the only one putting in effort and i'm still getting all the blame and i just can't fucking win and i feel absolutely helpless. and all the family drama going on in my life already has me on edge. so i closed out of the stupid lab meeting bc i am NOT going to have a panic attack over this nonsense lmao

and like. y'all know i love my advisor but i know he isn't going to do anything about this lmao. last time labmate and i were having issues... he definitely didn't say anything in our lab meetings to labmate, and if he handled it privately it didn't work because labmate STILL did not do ANYTHING to help for weeks (then decided to do everything on christmas, then texted & emailed me a bunch and got annoyed when i didn't reply, like ummmm it's winter break, if you have no life that's fine but i'm not dealing with this).

sooooo i am fucking done and i don't care what happens. i don't care if my advisor is mad at me, i don't care if this stupid paper ever gets finished, i literally just don't care!!!! i was already planning on dropping out. literally none of this matters.

anyway i'm very angry but also weirdly happy because this is just very validating of my choice to drop out. and i'm proud of my choice to drop out tbh, like i think it's really hard to accept that the things you used to dream of aren't actually good for you anymore, and i'm proud of myself for acknowledging that and for actually making a lot of progress in preparing to leave (i have a whole flowchart of things i need to complete and i'm making regular, sustained progress on checking things off the flowchart....... again shoutout to therapy and adderall <3)

SOOOOO yeah. i am pissed and i am ignoring all communications from people in my real life atm but it's gonna be ok. i just have to survive this without screaming at anybody (hence the SECOND ranty text post in as many days, i need to unleash my wrath on the internet)