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#but also i won't be able to cause im leaving early and will only have like 15 min for breakfast and just. ah im gonna scream
octarineblues · 14 days
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#hey guess who fucked up travel wise AGAIN#forgot my passport#am not at my place. or in my city.#tomorrow (today) instead of having a nice day and then a trip to tge airport and flying back home#(back to pl)#i'll be travelling back to my city. grabbing my passport. then going the long way to the airport.#fuck this sm i'm attending workshops and i'll miss the last day and i will have to explain to everyone why im leaving early cause they'll#be concerned#but also i won't be able to cause im leaving early and will only have like 15 min for breakfast and just. ah im gonna scream#scratch that im gonna cry#one professor i really wanted to talk to cause i am in a collaboration with him. so we will work in the same field for ages.#i'll have to explain to him why im leaving. but also i just really wanted to have a longer chat with him but he only came in this evening#and so now fuckkkkk#everyone will know and everyone will be concerned unless i tell everyone its just a stupid fucking passport. but everyone willl know#ok this is me talking to the void#i need ro go to sleep#wish me luck#personal#to delete#and also. i had to like agree to attend all days as a rule to partivipate in this thing cause of the funding#and like i know accidents happen and personal stuff happens but i feel really bad cause i agreed not to leave early#im blowing this out of proportion im sure it'll be fine & ppl will be concerned and helpful n not angry or whatever#but i just. wish i could go and not be perceived#fuck this#ok thats it im out
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xhoneygirlxx · 1 year
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We’re Not Friends
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Best Friend!Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader
summary: Eddie is just trying to help when he offers to be your date to your sister's wedding, but with all the love in the air will you and Eddie be able to stay friends?
warnings: lots of angst. reader's family sucks. reader's mom makes a comment about her weight. anxiety attacks. reader has low self esteem. fluff. best friends to lovers. fake dating. modern au. (this is titled after an Ed Sheeran song and I also use another one of his songs in the fic, sue me). slight smut. allusions to sex. alcohol consumption. swearing. minors dni!!!!!!!!!! reader and Eddie are both in their 20's. no y/n used, reader is referred to as Birdie. skin color/ethnicity/body type is not mentioned. spelling errors/shitting writing, just pretend you don't notice lmao. also the venue is completely made up and so is the location if you couldn’t tell, im not that creative.
*if I miss anything plz lmk*
a/n: hi my loves!!!! this is one of the last fics on my birthday fic list!!! I want to thank all of you for being patient and being so so supportive of my work. I love you all so much!!! also I do go back to work on Monday so I'm going to try to get as many fics pumped out by the end of the weekend.
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And that's why friends should sleep in other beds
And friends shouldn't kiss me like you do
And I know that there's a limit to everything
But my friends won't love me like you do
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The turning color of the leaves create the prettiest backdrop, tall trees blooming with orange, red, and a pinch of brown. The ones that have already fallen to the ground get swept up under the wheels of Eddie's car, lifting up and swirling around in a pretty dance, and falling right back into place waiting for the next car.
Although the crisp fall morning is peaceful you can't help but feel like you're living a nightmare. As he soft hum of Eddie's playlist flows through the speakers, you're coming up with a plan to turn the whole car around.
So far you thought about faking an illness, one that would stop the whole journey in it's tracks, only to dismiss it because you couldn't put your best friend through that stress. The idea of pulling the steering wheel also came to mind but you quickly threw that out of the window, not wanting to cause injury to the innocent man next to you or anyone else. Your final idea was one you're sure you could pull off as long as you used all the power within your being. If you pushed your feet on the floorboard hard enough, you could poke them out like the Flintstones and stop the car that way.
Between science and logic, you knew that wasn't possible no matter how hard you wished it would. Instead you'll stare out the window, watching all the pretty trees dance in the wind while you push down the rising anxiety that's forming in the pit of your stomach.
"You good over there, Birdie?" The deep voice next to you shakes you from your thoughts.
Turning your head Eddie's already looking at you with a lopsided grin. His demeanor matches the landscape outside, relaxed and serene. As you look at him you wish you could trade places, be as pleasant as he is.
"Yeah I'm just tired." Trying to sell him your answer, you smile lazily at him even though your response holds more tension than a game of tug of war.
Turning his attention back on the road, you watch as the pavement moves on the darkened lenses of his sunglasses. Eddie looks pretty like this, even though you always thinks he looks pretty. Usually he would be a grump having to be up this early, but today he wears his smile like a badge of honor. The dark curls of his hair cascade down his back, while some falls over his shoulders.
He's wearing the same red and black checkered flannel he always does this time of year, the same one you said was your favorite three years ago and it still holds that title. Underneath is a plain black tee shirt, the only one he has that's free of any band name, and a dark blue pair of jeans that have no holes.
He's still the same Eddie, his rings still sit on his fingers and his pick still hangs from the chain around his neck, but it seems that he only gets prettier and prettier as time passes by - like the turning leaves that still hang on the branches of the trees that you drive by.
"I think you're worried about this whole wedding thing," His voice is unwavering, screaming "I'm right" like it always does. "I don't get what's so bad about an open bar and free food."
Although his point is valid, Eddie couldn't be more wrong than that. This wasn't just an event to get drunk for free and stuffed to the gills at no charge. This was your older sister's wedding, the same sister that was the apple of your parents' eyes. Veronica was your arch nemesis since birth, a rival that you had no option but to defeat in order to survive.
You were the outcast of the family, the black sheep if you will, and you had to endure eighteen years of nonstop torture because of it. Your parents, Christine and Tim, were nothing but successful. The doctor and his trophy wife, the star couple in your small community, that had two beautiful and healthy children.
However you were the hardheaded child, the daughter that didn't have a bright future, you didn't carry as much promise as Vee, and your parents made sure to remind you of that every day. So when you moved out three years ago, you made sure to distance yourself as much as you could. But when you received a pristine white envelope with a glamorous invite on the inside, you were roped right back into the hell hole you worked so hard to leave behind.
You could've just ignore it, faked that you were on a trip and couldn't make it but your mother pretty much threatened you into showing up. So that's how you ended up in the countryside right outside of Chicago, driving in Eddie's Toyota Corolla to the Jefferson Manner on a Friday at eight am.
"You're right, Eddie, I should be so thrilled by that. Thank you so much for pointing it out to me." It's snippy with a hint of malice, and your eye roll held enough venom to injure an army of men.
Whistling loudly, Eddie chuckles lightly. "Woah, killer. Relax, I was just tryna help." He's still soft despite your outburst, sweet like your pumpkin spice latte that sits in the cupholder.
Hanging your head, you inhale a deep breath and release it slowly. "I'm sorry, Eds. I just really fucking hate my family."
He switches his attention from you and the road, taking in your saddened features. Reaching his right hand over the console, he places his hand searches for yours and laces his fingers through yours, which you gladly except.
"Don't apologize for that, kay? That's a valid reason for you to not want to go, I was just trying to make you laugh." The sincerity in his voice wraps around you, easing the nerves that go haywire in your body.
His palm is warm like the coffee cups that sit in the cup holders, his voice is as calming as the trees in the wind, and his smile is just as pretty as it was the first day you met him. You're safe with him, the safest you've ever been in your life, and here in the front seat of his car he reminds you of that.
"They just make me crazy, s'why I don't like seeing them." You feel shy being vulnerable, refusing to meet his gaze by focusing on tracing the back of his hand with your free one.
Eddie doesn't mind, instead he reassures you with a quick squeeze of your hand. "If it makes you feel any better, Birdie, I like you a little crazy."
Dimples deep as the sea and smile still as delicate as a flower's pedal, Eddie looks like a painting that hangs in the Louvre. You want to capture this moment of him to have for the rest of your life, so no matter what you can always remember him just like this.
"You say that now." You tease and he eats it right up.
Looking back over to you, he shines his smile onto you, filling you up with the light of a million stars. "And I'll say it till the end of time." There's no tease to it, nothing but truth in the way he says it.
It turns you into jelly, the feelings that swim through your blood stream, and now you've become too sheepish to answer. You decided to trust your touch over your words, squeezing his hand the same way he did to yours, trying your best to communicate the feelings you hold secretly in your heart for your best friend.
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The cobblestone driveway leading to the entrance of Jefferson Manner is, for a lack of a better word, beautiful. It is a straight drive to the property, but once you get closer, a large fountain sits in the middle where the arch of the circle driveway starts.
Different colored cars are already lined up, some you recognize and the rest you have no clue who they belong to. Either way it's pretty evident that Eddie 2018 Toyota sticks out like a sore thumb.
The same dread that you left 45 miles back, is now running through you again. Unintentionally, you squeeze his hand harder as your heart begins to pound in your ear and if it hurts him he doesn't mention it. Instead, Eddie gives you one, two, three squeezes and then lets you continue your attempt to stop the blood flow to his hand.
Pulling behind the Mercedes Benz S Class, he puts his car into park and then shuts the car off. Reading your expression the way he always does, he sits in the silence of the car with you until your features loosen up.
"You okay, Birdie?" Even though he knows you're not okay, you still appreciate him asking anyway.
Breathe in. This is temporary. Breathe out. This is not forever. Breathe in. I am safe. Breathe out. I am here.
You repeat this to yourself a few times, eyes clamped shut as you focus on your breathing pattern. Once your head is above water and your heart stops racing, you open your eyes back up to the real world.
Relaxing your shoulders, you let go of the grip you're holding Eddie's hand in. "I'm okay. I'll be okay." Despite answering him, it sounds like you're trying to convince yourself of what you're saying.
Another brief pause goes by and Eddie continues to monitor you, sunglasses now removed so not only can he see you but you can see him.
Your gaze is unwavering, the thousand yard stare has fallen over you and you have yet to dig out of it. "Are you prepared for what we're about to walk into?"
The tone of your voice scares Eddie, the emotion being sucked right out of the words that you speak despite the feelings that battle in your mind that he doesn't know about.
"Honey, I'm prepared for anything as long as I have you." For a split second he winces, wondering if that was too cringy but when your face breaks out into a sweet smile he feels better.
The two of you get out of the car, retrieving your suitcases and dress bags from the trunk. When the door shuts you begin to count the steps it takes to get to the big wooden doors of the mansion.
You don't have to ask Eddie for his hand, he's already giving it to you and you gladly except it, gripping on for dear life the closer you get. Despite the beautiful landscape and the soothing sound of the running fountain, you feel like this is the soundtrack that plays before your imminent death.
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The tall, thick, wooden doors sit menacingly in front of you, the skeletons of your past standing just right behind it waiting for your arrival. The ghosts that have haunted your dreams, the graveyard of your history, and the phantoms of your family, mingle and laugh right behind this door.
Eddie waits for you, not moving a muscle until you say so, and you silently thank him with a smile. Like a switch, he watches your face change from flight to fight mode. In a flash your looking over your outfit, brushing down the long black sleeved shirt that sits on your torso, and then straightening out the jeans that stick to your legs.
Your hair is the next thing you frantically fix, pushing it behind your ears and out of your face, letting it fall over your shoulders while doing so. Like a buzzing bee, you zone in on Eddie, fixing the collar of his flannel and then smoothing the material of his shirt. With out speaking, you pick off a singular piece of fuzz from his pants and then let it blow away in the wind.
Moving your hands back up to his chest, you center the pick on his chain. Then move his hair, fixing the ringlets that got blown around in the breeze. Once your satisfied, you move back to your spot next to him and sweep his hand right back into your hold. Releasing on more deep breath, you settle your pinched eyebrows and your determined eyes, and let the worst fake smile settle onto your lips.
The smile doesn't reach your eyes the way it usually does, your teeth push against one another so forcibly Eddie wonders if you'll shatter teeth, and you simply look like your in pain. Either way, you push open the big oak door and let yourself inside with him following right behind.
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The lobby of the manner is everything you expected, high ceilings, a crystal chandelier, and every single family member of yours gathered around sipping champagne and speaking to each other like a potential client.
Even though it's magnificent inside with the beautiful décor and lively plants, the sight of everyone in their gaudy outfits and cheap laughter makes it feel like an eternal hell.
Eddie must feel the way your shoulders tense because he's quickly leaning into you, his voice just a whisper in the shell of your ear.
"Hey, it's gonna be okay. You have me and I won't let anything happen." He reminds you, his smile is more sympathetic than anything.
Nodding your head you remain smiling, it's awful and it hurts even doing it but if you want to survive the whirlpool of piranhas, then you just have to fake it until you make it.
"If it isn't our lovely Birdie!" The sound of your mother's voice is like silk, smooth and confident, just like she always was. Walking over to you, she holds a champagne flute in her hand and you wonder how much the bubbling spritz cost your father.
The last time you've seen her was last winter, her million dollar smile outshining the Swarovski crystal tree decorations that sit behind her. Your mother has always been beautiful but her insides are rotten, ugly and maggot infested, all hidden behind the mask that she put on for everyone to see.
You gave up a long time ago trying to figure out her brain, finally accepting defeat to the maze that was her mind. Now when you look at your mother all you see is a shell, a hallow covering that has nothing to offer you other than it's pretty design.
Pulling you into a hug, you're hit with her scent. She smells like Dior and cashmere, the Chanel outfit that sits on her body scratches your skin, and the pearl necklace she wears jabs you right in your collarbone.
"Hello mother, thank you for inviting me to such a wonder occasion." You instantly revert back to your old accent, the same one your mother instilled into you from the time you could even under stand the English language.
A faux laugh comes from her bright red lips, "No need for that, darling, you're always welcome." Her manicured hand waves at you in fake genuineness.
The smile on your face continues to show and you hate to think it matches hers. Even with the sweet tone you use and the gentleness of your actions, the blood that runs through your body continues to boil the longer she stands there.
Eddie on the other hand stands next to you completely and utterly amused by your fake performance. The snort he lets out when you continue to use your "eloquent" voice is quickly covered up by a sniffle.
Like a vulture, your mother's eyes are quick to zero in on the curly haired man next to you. "Excuse my daughter for her bad manner of not introducing us, I'm Christine."
The minute her hand reaches out for a handshake, you're heart stops. This is the one thing that could make or break this whole trip and it was the only thing you didn't prepare your best friend for. Many years of your life, you were trained that a handshake is all it takes for someone to learn about you.
Without skipping a beat, Eddie simply picks embraces her hand like a prince out of a Disney movie and places a kiss to the back of her unwrinkled hand.
"What a pleasure to meet you, Christine, I'm Eddie. And might I say how beautiful you are."
He's all dimples and doe eyes staring at your mother, a true prince charming in his red flannel and jeans. His voice is like a cup of hot chocolate on a cold day, it's smooth going down your throat and it warms your belly better than any blanket can.
That warmth is now tingling your body, a frenzy of butterflies flapping around in the walls of your heart. It clearly works on your mother as well but unlike you she doesn't hide it very well.
"You're really the charmer, Eddie." It's flirtatious and alluring, the same voice she put on for every pool boy your father ever hired.
Annoyance and anger floods through you and you know that your eyes would be shining green to anyone with a trained eye.
While she clutches her pearls and eyes Eddie like he's a four course meal, you intervene into the conversation before it can continue.
"Where's daddy? I'd really like for my boyfriend to meet him." You bat your eyelashes like a pageant queen and your arm acts like a python wrapping around Eddie's, making a mark on what is yours.
"Oh you're father's around here somewhere, you know how he is." She dismisses, taking a drink from her glass and swallowing down the golden liquid quickly. "So how long have you and Birdie here been dating?"
"It's going to be two years next month. Isn't that right, honey?" Eddie turns to you and gives you a playful smile.
Looking back at him you hope he can see the misery that hides being your eyes, a white flag of surrender.
Your mother on the other hand doesn't care about your answer, that's why she didn't ask you. She's reading Eddie, trying to see how much she can push your so called boyfriend until she gets what she wants.
"Well that's just wonderful, young love is a beautiful experience. You have to be careful with Birdie here, she's known to leave the nest quickly." It's a jab, a spiteful and mean comment headed right for your gut.
Eddie doesn't miss the way you're lips falter for a second, the flash of hurt in your eyes. It kills him watching you stand there and take all the comments from your mother like stray bullets.
Turning his attention back to your mother, he gives her a smile, one that you would know as a wicked one but to a stranger would seem kind. "I don't think that will be a problem. Birdie knows where her home is."
It's a direct warning, a clear sign to your mother to not mess with you or what is yours. Just him sticking up for you like that makes your stomach twist in excitement, a feeling you've grown so used to over the course of friendship with Eddie.
"Well, I'm glad she finally found her place then." Your mother responds coldly, clearly hearing the bite in his tone. "Why don't you two go find your room and get settled in, rehearsal dinner is in a few."
Before retreating into the large crowd of family, your mother turns back to you in one more attack.
"Oh and Birdie, wear something that will hide that stomach. Don't want anyone to assume you've been knocked up."
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Once you've found your room, you all but rush Eddie inside slamming the door behind you. In the quiet safety of your suite, you can relax your shoulders that have been sitting high since you've arrive.
"Jesus Bird, you weren't lying." Eddie says as he flops himself on the queen sized bed.
You don't respond, instead you squeeze your eyes shut and try to calm the heaviness of your breathing. Behind the darkness of your eyes, little twinkles of stars flash from how hard you have them closed, the swooshing of your heart continuing in your ears like angry waves of the sea.
Breathe in. This is temporary. Breathe out. This is not forever. Breathe in. I am safe. Breathe out. I am here.
You repeat this to yourself over and over again, trying to erase the cruel words of your mother and the images of disgusted family member's faces out of your mind. You're not sure how long you've been standing by the door until a hand grasps at your wrist lightly.
"Birdie," Eddie's coax goes unanswered, "Come on, Birdie."
Warm calloused hands travel to the plump of your cheeks, lifting your face up just enough that he can see you. Finally opening your eyes, you're relieved to be looking into the golden whiskey pools of his.
Smoothing his thumb over your cheek he doesn't say anything, just lets your breathing calm down. Here you are, in the nice room behind the shelter of the locked door, and he's here.
Breathe in. It's okay. Breathe out. You're safe. Breathe in. You are here. Breathe out. So is he.
It's enough to let your feet move on the plush white carpeting, while Eddie leads you to the bed with the tug of your arm. Sitting on the plush mattress on crisp linen sheets you're grounded, and with the heat of Eddie sitting next to you and his hand in yours, you're anchored.
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The rehearsal dinner goes over well enough, the Irish mule helping with every single speech that's given and every horror story of your childhood that is told. Luckily for you, Vee didn't ask you to be in her bridal party so you didn't have to attend the actual wedding rehearsal, and even better you won't have to deal with her for the real thing tomorrow.
Eddie does great at dinner, he talks to your father who surprisingly likes him, both getting along over their love for vintage cars. Your soon to be brother in law and his groomsmen also get along with Eddie, they laugh and cut up most of the time while clinking beer bottles together. Not to mention every single woman there wanted to get into his pants, swooning at everything he said and giving him the 'fuck me' eyes while doing it.
You hated it, every single minute of it. Like always you were ignored, simply looked over until some story was being told where you were ultimately the joke of. Any time someone asked you what you were doing with your life, you were met with cringing smiles and snickering laughs.
Four separate times your mother commented on your dress, the way it fit, the price value of it, and how it really wasn't a good color on you. All of your sisters friends rolled their eyes and whispered back and forth while staring at you, aunts and uncles acted dumbfounded when you told them that you were a freelance writer for a small music magazine back in Indy, and your cousins made comments about how badly you look since the last time you saw them.
It didn't matter anyway, even if your sister asked how you managed to get a stand up guy like Eddie to agree to be with you, in front of all of the guests. You had to remind yourself that you were there for the free booze and food or whatever the hell Eddie said in the car on the way here.
This wasn't a popularity contest for you, it was simply you being forced to do something against your wishes because your mother said so. You asked yourself why you even listened to her in the first place while letting the brown liquor burn in your stomach.
Why was it so important that you even showed up here? Why did you have to come to the awarding ceremony of favorite kid when you knew you weren't going to win? Why would you even set yourself up for such failure just because your mom said so?
Well, you're answer came when a flushed faced Eddie was laughing with your grandparents at one of the round tables in the corner. His eyes crinkled at the sides and his head was leaned back so you had a clear view of the neck you loved so much.
Then you looked over at your sweet looking grandparents who laughed loudly at whatever was said. Your grandmother had her hands on her cheeks, shaking her head back and forth, and beaming brightly. Your grandfather smiled around his cigar, big round belly jumping with laugher, and his cheeks smooshing up against the frames of his big glasses.
You didn't come here to win a competition. You didn't come here because your mother threatened you within an inch of your life if you didn't. You didn't come here because you thought it would be fun.
You showed up because you wanted to prove to the people who doubted you for so long just how happy you were. You wanted to prove that happiness doesn't come from the amount of money in your account or how many rooms sit in your house. You came here because you wanted to prove that they were wrong, that the grass on the other side of the fence could be green too, and that someone who grew up differently that you could still do amazing things.
Eddie was someone that your father would've had you kicked out over bringing him home in high school. Eddie was the boy your mother would tell you to stay far away from. Eddie was the kind of guy that your sister wouldn't look twice at because of who he was.
But right now, during the beautiful dinner the night before your sister's wedding, your best friend/fake boyfriend has them all wrapped around his guitar calloused finger.
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Not much has been said between you and him, especially when he was the man of the hour. You're not really complaining though, you're happy that he made a good impression with them. When the night began to settle into your bones and the alcohol started to make you tipsy, you slyly walked up to Eddie and tugged on his sleeve to let him know it was time to go.
On the walk back to the room, you sway slightly with every step you take, balancing on the walls with one hand while the other holds your strappy heels. When Eddie stops and turns to the door of your room, you all but smack into him with clumsy steps.
While he fumbles with key, you're in blissful content with your eyes closed. The kick of the lock and the turn of the handle doesn't even pull you out of your daze, instead you hold your arms out like a mummy and feel around until you find Eddie's clothed back.
You can tell Eddie is laughing by the large breath that passes through his nose and the tell tale sign of him kissing his teeth. Large hands wrap around your wrists, guiding you into the doorway that you can't see.
Your cheeks are warm, the smile on your face is permanent, and the buzzing in your heart makes you feel light on your feet.
"Alright mummy, lets get you into bed." Letting go of his hold on you, you feel him slightly brush past you to close the door. His voice sounds like the way stars look, sparkling and bright, twinkling all around.
You giggle, eyes still shut and your nose scrunched up. "M'not a mummy but I could be if ya want."
Putting your arms out, you lean back and forth on your feet to mimicking what you think is a mummy but looks more like a zombie.
"Baaaaahhhhh, I'm a mummy. Be very afraid." You deepen your voice, dragging the syllables of every word to make them come out slower.
Eddie must be entertained because the sound of a loud raspberry comes from where he stands, the clear sign of him losing the grip on the laugh he'd been holding in.
Cracking one of your eyes open, you hope to find him with rose cheeks and dimples flashing, the look you love so much. Instead you see him, beaming at you without the shine of his canines. It's an admiring smile, one where your eyes go all gooey and your smile is simple yet dipped with so much love.
Opening your eyes all the way, you let your arms down slowly to rest by your sides, a meek look painting your face.
"Did I do good?" You ask, even though you didn't really want his opinion.
"I think you're perfect." It comes out even, smooth like the hilltops in December covered in a layer of the purest snow.
The two of you sit there for a while, soaking up the glow of each other and letting it sink into your souls. For a moment you wonder if he feels it too, the spark that you feel whenever he's around. You wonder if he feels like crying simply because he loves you that much. You wonder if he wishes this whole dating thing wasn't just a lie and that it was true, the same way you wish it was.
Once the moment ends for him, he's clearing his throat to clear any lovesick daze that's left. "I guess we better head to bed, huh?"
Scratching at the back of his neck, you try with everything in your power to not look down where his turtle neck rode up, where the patch of mouth watering hair trails from his belly button to underneath the waist of his pants.
A part of you wishes you stuck it out longer, stayed in your seat at the dinner table just to see him in his outfit longer. He asked you to help him pick it out this morning and when you think back to it, you get flustered with thinking how domesticated it felt. Making him try on different shirts and jumping for joy when he walked out of the bathroom wearing a turtleneck he swore he'd never wear. The khakis you pulled out of his suitcase was the cause of so much laughter and the pink tinge that sat on the rounds of his cheeks.
God, he looked so good, especially with his hair pulled back and the dangled earring that sat in his ear, but now it would all be a memory for you to file away in the back of your brain.
Eddie had already started taking off his dress shoes, sitting on the edge of the bed bent over and messing with the knots that kept the laces together.
The smile that once held your lips high and proud, now weigh down in a sad frown. Even after the success of the dinner and proving everyone wrong, you are now brought back to the reality of what you and Eddie were. Just friends.
"Since I'm a gentleman and I can't see to get these shoes untied, I'll let you shower first." His voice comes out strained from how hard he pulls on the knotted strings.
You don't say anything, quietly nodding your head before shuffling over to your suitcase that sits by the closet. Grabbing a sleepshirt and some shorts, you go to move around the lanky man that can't get his shoes off no matter how hard he tries.
Without a sound, you kneel in front of him, placing your clothes somewhere off to the side. Taking his calf in your hand, you place his foot on your thigh. Delicately, you remove the first shoe and then the next.
"Y'didn't have to do that." It's quiet but not enough to be a whisper, still you shrug.
"I didn't but I wanted to." It seems so simple when you say it, even though deep down inside you wanted that last piece of your fantasy before it goes away for the rest of the night.
"Will you help me with my dress?" You ask him, standing on your feet and turning so that the golden zipper is facing him.
In the mirrored closet door you can see him and how he hesitates for a moment, shaky hands lingering in the air before they close in on the gold slider.
The sound of the metal teeth unlatching from one another fills the room, clouding the unrhythmic beat of your heart. You try to remember the feeling of him on the sacred part of your skin, the way his light touch tickles you and makes goosebumps rise. You want to memorize it like your favorite song, so that when you leave this place and the fake nature of this whole thing goes away, you still have something to think about on those bad days.
It ends too soon for your liking, his hands retracting right back to the sides of his body like a measuring tape. With the fuzz of your tipsy has now wore off but the sting of everything still remains.
Giving him a small smile and muttering a thank you, you hide in the bathroom where the sound of running water hides the muffled cries that leave your throat.
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Waking up felt more painful than any hangover you've ever had. The pain of Eddie's bare back facing you was heartbreaking. You force yourself not connect the freckles that litter his skin or trace your fingers along his spine and shoulder blades.
It's a sight you've seen plenty of times and sharing a bed is something you've done more than enough that you're not uncomfortable. Yet your heart squeezes, wrapping itself up in the tightest loop so that it hurts to even breathe.
The sound of his soft snores only makes it worse, imagining what he dreams about and if it's you.
You use all of the willpower that's left in your body, marching over to the small kitchenette that sits in the corner of the giant room. Pouring yourself a cup of coffee, you try to focus on the swirl of dark liquid mixing with the coffee creamer and how they mix together so perfectly. Without much of a peep, you slide the glass doors that lead out to the balcony and sit down in one of the plush chairs.
You look out over the mountains of colors, tracing over the lines of trees that go on for miles. Although pretentious, you think Veronica did an excellent job and choosing this location.
Sipping on the hot beverage, you watch the clouds in the blue sky go by, wondering what it would've been like if your sister asked you to be a bridesmaid. You imagine that the two of you would've actually gotten along and maybe even laughed together. You envision what it would've been like to have your mother compliment you in your gown and how it would feel to take a picture with your family where all the smiles were real.
Tears begin to burn the back of your eyes, falling rapidly like a fall rainstorm. The skin of your cheeks burn slightly from the heated trails of water that fall. You're sad and incredibly so. Within the first twenty four hours of being here, you remember how much of an outsider you really are to these people.
Even with the company of Eddie, someone that truly loves you, you still can't help but feel so fucking lonely. To put on the mask you wore for many year back on and pretend that the man standing next to you is yours to claim is harder than any other time you had to do it.
This time you weren't really faking it, the love that you showed to him, the happiness you felt with him was real, just the titles weren't. With the cool fall chill, your coffee has gone cold but your tears keep coming.
"You made yourself a cup of coffee but not one for me, and this is how I find out? That's just mean." Eddie's curly hair pokes out from the small gap in the sliding back door that he's created.
His eyes are squinted from the harshness of the morning sun but his cheeky smile is forever unwavering. Sliding a space big enough for him to go through, he stalks out onto the small space in his plaid pajama pants and a hoodie he must've thrown on.
Trying your best to cover up that you've been crying, you wipe the back of your hand across your cheeks, but Eddie still catches your movements.
Instead of embarrassing you, he sits down in the chair across from you and looks out over the balcony.
"You okay?" It's a simple enough question, one that you can answer with one word and he wouldn't pry for more information to not overwhelm you.
Sniffling, you shake your head yes and then move your gaze to where his is. "No, yeah, m'good. The view really does something for me." You say, chuckling just a bit at your own joke.
Eddie also laughs, only this time it's not as genuine as it usually is, just a hard exhale through his nose.
"Yeah, sure does." He agrees, letting his eyes follow the red and orange of the tree tops.
A calm silence falls over you two, only the sounds of the birds that fly and the ruffle of the leaves can be heard from where you sit. It's peaceful.
"You know, I really thought this weekend would be different." It comes out of your mouth as easy as the breeze that blows. Still your eyes stay trained out in front of you and past the mountains of trees.
Eddie doesn't respond but the hole that he burns through the side of your head with his eyes tell you he's listening.
"When I was little, I used to imagine the day Vee got married. I would fantasize that maybe one day we could be close enough that I could enjoy this day with her and we could be sisters for once." You exhale an uneven breath, moving your sights to the cup that still sits in your hand.
"I just wanted all of us to be a family for once. I wanted my mom to actually act like she liked me, for my dad to say that for once he was proud of who I was, and for Veronica, I just wanted her to say she's happy that I'm her little sister."
Just like that, every single thing you've carried since you were little is now out in the open, whipping around in the wind like the dead leaves. Even with the amount of burden that's been lifted, the pain still remains the same. It all hurts, stabbing you over and over again in the scars that you worked so hard to patch up.
Eddie doesn't say anything and for a moment you don't think he'll say anything at all. You watch him pull out the pack of cigarettes he had nestled in his pocket and place one in between his pretty pink lips.
Another second goes by and he's flicking the wheel of his lighter, shielding the flame away from the wind so he can light it. When the end of the smoke burns red, he takes a big inhale and then lets the cloud of smoke out.
"I know what I say won't matter," He starts before taking another drag of his smoke, "But these people don't fucking mean anything."
"They're you're family and I get that but they don't fucking deserve you, they never have. A fake boyfriend, a new haircut, or a cool job shouldn't define their love for you. They're shitty people who were blessed with an amazing person and they didn't even realize it."
Eddie looks at you the same way he speaks, with nothing but truth. You let the words settle in your mind, letting them soak in, in case you forget.
The tears that once ceased start to flow again, except this time it's from relief. It feels good that someone else sees your worth, to know someone actually holds value to you.
"It kills me that they treat you the way they do, that they can say all those things without batting an eye. I know why you asked me to come here and I know I have a job to do, but man do I want to rip them all a new asshole."
Although he speaks with fire behind the words, you have to laugh from the thought of the actions. The moment you giggle, his own smile forms.
"I hope you know that I love you and when everything is done and over with, we'll give them the bird." To make his point, Eddie raises his middle finger high into the sky.
Repeating his actions, you hold your own finger to the sky and smile happily while doing it.
Letting his arm fall back down into place, he pats the tops of your thighs and stands from the chair.
"That's my girl, now let's get ready for an open bar and free booze." Holding his open palm to you, he helps you up.
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The wedding reception was what you thought it would be, drawn out and boring. The only saving grace of the whole thing was Eddie's commentary, the scruff on his face tickling you every time he leaned close to your ear.
A lot of the things he was saying was probably just to make you feel better but you did have to agree, the dress Veronica picked out was a bad rip off of Princess Diana's and it shouldn't have seen broad daylight.
You did however get choked up when the vowels started, not because you were happy with your sister but because you wish that were you and Eddie up there instead.
All and all it was okay, even though one of your brother in law's aunt's wore a hat so big you couldn't see past it most of the time.
The wedding reception though was beautiful. The décor of the manner looked exquisite against the maroon coloring of all the bridesmaids dresses. The tables had beautiful bouquets sitting in the middle and you can't help but laugh imagining your father cutting a check for all of them.
To much of yours and Eddie's delight, there is an open bar that is stacked high with pricey alcohol. Again you laugh thinking about your father having to pay the tab, which you and Eddie will be happy to run up.
So far this is the most the two of you had fun, both laughing and enjoying the company that's around you. The table you've been stuck at is also occupied by other family rejects that enjoy the titles they've been given.
Eddie's hand hasn't left your thigh, which you're more than happy about, and every so often he flexes his fingers squeezing the meaty flesh.
You feel good, the boost from the drinks and the feeling of your best friend makes you bloom like a flower in the spring. You watch as he talks to the people at your table and how his hand moves with enthusiasm. You trace the muscles in his neck and watch his adam's apple bob up and down when he speaks. Your chin sits in the palm of your hand as you watch him be himself like he always is.
He's so beautiful, he always has been, and in this moment he gets to be yours. You don't have to think about what anyone else thinks, you don't have to question how the two of you look from another's perception, because you know that your heart bleeds for him and it always will.
Eddie's your home, he's your best friend, and he's your person. You think back to what he said to you this morning and how he called you a blessing but you think he's wrong. Eddie is the true blessing. He's sweet, he's smart, and he's so fucking caring it's disgusting. Behind all the jagged features and dark clothes, he's nothing but a giant teddy bear that wears his heart on his sleeve.
"Birdie." He smiles at you, all goo and mush it makes your heart skip.
You hum in response, still sitting in the same position, looking at him as if he were a painting.
"You wanna dance?" He blushes, embarrassed by the request and you feel like you're back in junior high.
"You, Eddie Munson hate dancing." You say, scrunching your nose cutely.
Laughing loudly, he nods, "Yeah, I know, but I'd dance with you."
That breaks you out of your daze, breath catching in your throat. "O-oh, yeah. I'll um dance."
Again he stands, holding a palm out to you so he can help you up. Leaning you to the dance floor, you can't help but feel jittery despite the wine that you've consumed.
Once out on the floor, he pulls you into his chest. Strong hands grip your waist through the silk fabric of your red dress and you desperately try to fight the need that rises in your guy.
You stand stiff, unsure of what to do with yourself and Eddie's quick to help you, placing your hands around his neck where they lay contently.
He looks good tonight, even better than last night, and you hate how it makes butterflies flap around in your stomach. The black button up shirt sits nicely on his torso, wrapping his arms so deliciously you want to take a bite out of them. The black slacks he wears fit nicely and you wonder if he had them tailored and you have to ignore the want to undo the sleek black belt with a bright golden buckle that holds them up. Again his hair sits in a low bun and that silver chain peeks out at you from underneath his collar.
"I can't believe you asked me to dance to Ed Sheeran." You say breathlessly, still nervous with being this close to him.
Eddie snorts, lopsided smile forming on his lips. "What, a guy can't like Ed Sheeran and metal? That's gatekeeping, sweetheart." He teases.
Rolling your eyes, you try to ignore that tingle that settles in your cheeks. "Whatever you say, Munson."
"I'm serious, Thinking Out Loud was in my top ten last year." The two of you hold eye contact until you can't take it anymore, both bursting into laughter at his admission.
"That's something you shouldn’t repeat." You sputter at him and he laughs even harder.
"Hey, I like this song, okay?" He defends, still swaying back and forth with you.
Raising your hands in defense, you pull back on your clowning for the sake of your friend. Placing your arms back around his neck, you lean your head on his chest and try to hear the beat of his heart.
The scent of him floods your nose, cologne and smoke, whiskey and linen, and you wish you could bottle it to keep forever.
"Why do you like this song anyway? It's kind of basic." You mutter at him.
His shoulders lift in a shrug, and he takes a moment to respond. "Honestly, I like it cause it reminds me of you."
Your eyebrows furrow in confusion and you remove your head to look up at him.
"Wha'do you mean?" You mumble, eyes searching his for some sort of answer.
Looking bashful again, red tints his cheeks and ears in a blush. Sticking his tongue out to wet his lips, he hesitantly answers.
"I always felt like he said everything I couldn't, ya know? Everything I ever wanted to say to you, he put in a song."
It feels like the whole world stops, that time freezes and it's just the two of you. You're in shock and for some reason you can't wrap your head around anything he's saying.
"What?" You say harshly and again he shrugs, shying away from your burning focus on him.
"Reminds me of you and everything I ever felt about you. I always wanted to call you mine but if you hadn't noticed, I'm a chicken shit."
You don't say anything, instead you stare at him with your mouth wide open. Eddie starts to loose his cool, frantically flexing his fingers against the material of your dress, looking around at anything but you.
"Sorry, I - shit, I really fucked this up," He doesn't get to finish his sputtering apology because you quickly smash your lips into his.
His lips taste like brown liquor and chapstick, like love and forever, and you can't believe you waited this long to experience it. Two heart sync as one, two people fall together like the leaves outside, and anxieties are finally laid to rest.
You hate that you pull away first but the need for air is too much. Eddie bends enough so that his forehead leans on yours, both looking into each other eyes living in the moment of your blissed out hearts.
"Tell me if I'm being too forward but do you wanna get out of here?" He flirts and you respond simply by pecking his lips once more.
"Thought you'd never ask."
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thank you all for reading!!! love you guys <3
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volturiprincess · 4 months
Text
Death Flower
Jane Volturi x Fem human mate
Summary: Jane contradicts a lot but a simple "my little death flower" and its all over.
A/N: I wanted to post this on May 31st since that marks half way to Halloween but I forgot about this WIP. I got some ideas brewing for when October comes around. Its short but anyways....Enjoy💙
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“No”
“No? Why not?”
‘I said no and that is final, so stop pestering me on this”
“Come on my little death flower, let's not be like this”
She stopped walking away and stood on the spot. Here's the thing about being mates with Jane, yes she can be quite difficult to convince to do things, such as cuddling under our favorite open field, but I know a certain trick to persuade her. I noticed this a while ago, she was going to leave for a guard meeting that would start in 30 minutes, but she wanted to leave early but I wanted her to cuddle with me. She’s still not used to affection, which I understand, she took a month to even just hold my hand so I understand that and I respect her boundaries. But as she was getting ready to leave for her meeting I sleepily called out to her “My little storm cloud” and she halted her movements and was instantly in bed with her being the big spoon and I the little one.
I didn't dare to question her sudden change of mind but from that whenever I wanted to “get my way” with her I would casually call her some clever nicknames and she goes with my idea. I of course never call her out in front of the others, actually one time I called her my “little rain cloud” in front of Alec. He instantly looked at Jane and started teasing her and would call her the same nickname for days until Jane threatened to use her ability on him, that for sure shut him up. I promised to her that I would never call her said nicknames in front of others. 
Jane also from what I can say is she doesn't like being called the traditional nicknames, once in a while I do call her darling or my love but it doesn't get the same reaction as when I call her my other nicknames. It's just so amusing to see her halt her every thought and movements when I call her such names, but what makes my heart flip is when she looks at me and you can see a very small smile spreading onto her angelic face. 
“What is it that you wanted to do again?”
Oh man I got her so good, I almost feel bad in kind of manipulating her with my nicknames but man she always gets her way a majority of the time. She always gets the final say but I guess it does feel nice to finally be able to have a small win with her. And gosh that smile she does is so sweet, it's hard to imagine her being able to cause such pain with her gaze when she has such an angelic smile. 
“Oh right, um I wanted you be my Morticia to my Gomez”
“But Halloween is not for another five months?”
“I know but that's going to be our couple costume”
“Hmm we will see”
“Come on Jane, it ill be perfect, I already treat you like you are the only person in my life, I even call you the nicknames that are very similar to what Gomez calls Morticia”
“I said we will see”
I know she likes the idea, she just won't admit it. I think she would make a beautiful Morticia, but in this case she will be a blonde Morticia. In no way will I make her wear a wig to cover her golden locks that I love so much. In my case I would be a female version of Gomez, I'm also at the point of convincing the others to be characters from “The Addams Family”. Felix will definitely be Lurch no doubt, but for some reason im stuck with the thought that Alec and Demetri would be a great Pugesly and Wednesday. They will be my next victims to convince them to go along with my crazy plan. I grabbed her hand to place a gentle slow kiss on it, I felt her literally melt at the touch.
“Fine we will do it, but you dare make me wear a wig I will have Alec use his smoke on you”
Shivering at her little “threat” which I know she will never do, she has said that many times in the past and has never once done it to me.
“I would never want to cover your blonde locks my dear thundercloud”
“...Good”
Being Jane’s mate has its downs but if you play your cards right it can have its perk. 
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everydayyoulovemeless · 8 months
Note
Hello!
I always wondered honestly how FO4 faction leaders (and maybe some companions that also belong to sayd faction, like Danse) whould react finding out the Sole Survivor is with the Enclave? (Maybe via a tattoo they have or dogtag)
Im guessing most whould be very unhappy and instantly accuse them of being a spy.
I'm interested what you think, since for fo4 the only Enclave option you really have is the Enclave rising mod but companions don't comment on it of corse.
Fo4 Factions React To Sole Being With The Enclave
➼ Word Count » 1.7k ➼ Warnings » None ➼ Genre » Platonic/Romantic, Angst? ➼ A/N » This is such an interesting idea! Also, I hope you don’t mind but, I added a few more faction characters 🤭
Preston was horrified when he found out. There have been a few stories from settlers migrating from the Capital Wasteland, but he never imagined that you, of all people, would be with them. The entire idea of 'cleansing the land' is precisely what the Minutemen are trying to fight against. He feels as if you've just been using him this entire time for your own personal gain. Why else would you agree to be general if you didn't believe in their cause? Did you ever think they'd be able to make a change? Or were you just playing along for the fun of it? It's an understatement to say he's angry, though, more at himself than you. Out of everyone he could've stumbled upon to make into the Minutemen's new leader, you're who it was. And he was the one who supported you. Preston's won't be in the mood for compromising, he'll just turn you away. Similar to how he does when you side with the Nuka-World raiders. He's over it. He'll start over - find someone new, and you can go back and do whatever it is that you do. He's disgusted with himself for sticking with you for so long, but also because of how he can't bring himself to kill you. He just wishes you didn't try so hard to be friends with him. Then your betrayal wouldn't hurt him so badly.
Sturges noticed the Enclave marking early on but didn't know what it symbolized and never mentioned it. It wasn't until he overheard your argument with Preston that he decided to approach you about it. He stopped you while you were leaving Sanctuary and softly asked what happened between you and Preston. A part of him hoped he could mend your relationship with him, even if he knew it was far past that point. He cares for the both of you. The Minutemen were the best thing to ever happen to him, and he'd be damned if he let it break apart without trying to fix anything. That's what he's known for, isn't it? Fixing things? Even after he talks to you, he's still not sure what the Enclave is. All he knows is that he desperately wants both you and Preston to come to an agreement. He feels like a kid in the middle of a messy divorce and it stresses him out.
Any tough exterior that Elder Maxson puts up is immediately shattered when he sees that painfully familiar mark. He's seen firsthand what they've done to the world - what they're capable of, and he refuses to condone that behavior, especially when it comes to a supposed member of his cause. He'll stare you down with both a mix of fear and anger for stepping aboard the Prydwen. Who do you think you are? Surely, your joining the Brotherhood wasn't an accident, and he's not willing to wait and find out what your purpose for infiltrating them is. You're off the ship. No discussion necessary. He refuses to fight alongside anyone of your stature, and if he ever sees you again, he won't hesitate in ordering your death. The Commonwealth won't be a repeat of the Capital Wasteland. He'll make sure of it.
Danse doesn't have many memories of the Enclave, but if it evoked a reaction like that out of Elder Maxson, then he's sure you can't be anyone good. The decision on what should happen to you is out of his control, but whatever is decided, he'll stick with and enforce. His loyalty to the Brotherhood outweighs his relationship with you. Even if you were considerably close to him, he'd still be firm in his stance. You either need to leave for another state or be exterminated. Heartbroken as he might be, this isn't the first time he's had to do something he found hard for the betterment of the Brotherhood. He was close to Cutler, and look where he is. Danse doesn't sympathize with enemies, and you're no exception.
Haylen might not have been a scribe during the Brotherhood-Enclave War, but she still remembers those moments vividly. It was concerning as a civilian, and she can't even imagine what it felt like for those who were on duty. Despite the threat you could be to the Brotherhood, she feels conflicted about completely dismissing you. You've done a lot to support their cause and, to her, that means something, no matter if you've got an Enclave marking or not. Whatever Maxson decides is what he decides, but know that if you ever happened to be in the same area, she'd gladly bring you a bit of supplies.
Desdemona notices it, and would've turned you away when you first discovered the Railroad if it weren't for Deacon vouching for you. She's suspicious of you from day 1 and nothing ever changes about that. Even if you helped them out from start to finish she'd be suspicious. The Enclave is a massive and very dangerous organization that the Railroad does not support in any capacity. The fascism alone makes her feel critically toward you and you'll have spies observing your every move until she decides that she finally trusts you, which probably won't happen until you show you've fully quit working with them altogether.
Deacon’s aware of who you're affiliated with early on, but he hopes his shpeal about looking at what the organizations are doing rather than what they're telling you will change your mind. He really likes you and thinks that you'd be a great asset to the Railroad, especially since you've had military training at some point from being with the Enclave. Maybe it's idealistic of him, but he's really hoping that he can get you to change sides. He knows what it's like to have a past you're not proud of, and he genuinely believes he can get through to you and convince you to quit the Enclave at some point. Even if no one else in the Railroad agrees with him on that. There's just something about you that he's always been drawn to, and he doesn't want to give up on you so fast.
Tinker Tom's with Dez on this. He doesn't trust you either and would build you a gun just so he can track where you go. Every time you come near him, his eyes go wide with fear and his shoulders tense up. You don't know it, but he's got a pocket knife on him that he's itching to use the second you do something to fast. The only thing that'd make him feel a little better about having you around is if you agree to be injected with his battery acid. It'll make him calm down a little bit, but he still won't exactly like having you around so often. You're just not one of them. The Enclave and the Railroad both have complete opposite goals and it's hypocritical for you to argue you're loyal to both.
Glory might actually start firing on you if you even slightly raise you're voice at anyone in HQ. She's with everyone else in that she doesn't think you're someone who can be relied on and she does everything she can to get that across to you. In fact, if you do anything she deems suspicious or possibly traitorous, she'll attempt to assassinate you on your next outing. You're going to have to prove a lot to her, and many other Railroad members that you're not going to sell them out the second the opportunity arises. She's rude to you, sure, but you've got to understand that this is her family she's trying to protect, and you being there is a threat in it of itself.
Father doesn’t care as much as he probably should. He doesn’t see the Enclave, or any group for that matter, as a threat. At most, they’re just a nuisance that might slow down the Institute, but it’s something that’s easy to fix. He's a bit cocky in that way. Unless your relationship with the faction interferes with any of the Institute's plans, he won’t pay much mind to it. Just keep them in DC, won’t you? There's enough organizations to deal with in the Commonwealth as it is, no point in adding another.
X6-88 doesn't like it, and he's very vocal about wanting you to quit, but it's ultimately your decision. In his mind, the Institute is the only faction you should be focused on, especially if you're planning on being the leader, so quitting the Enclave would be in your best interest. He also has a cocky outlook concerning the Enclave and fully believes that, if anything were to occur, the Institute would be able to defuse it instantly. Despite his disagreement with who you're affiliated with, he'll still follow you. You're still his boss, and until you give him a reason to suspect that you're not as committed to the cause as you claim, it's none of his business who you decide to work with.
Dr Li is on edge the moment that you’re introduced. She can’t help but think back on everything the Enclave's done to the world - done to her. She does her best to hide her face from you, and whenever she has to talk to you, she's noticeably more nervous and tense. All she can think about is the assassination of James and the abduction of the Lone Wanderer. She's never trusted them and doesn't intend on doing it now. She's fully convinced that part of why you're here is to finish the job in exterminating her. She doesn't believe for a second that you'll do the Institute right and will leave to rejoin the Brotherhood if you happen to stay. It stresses her out that none of the other scientists seem to feel as concerned as she is with the thought of you being in the heart of their bunker. No amount of pleading will get anyone else to agree with her about being suspicious and that makes her incredibly fearful.
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okkottsus · 2 years
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I love reading your analysis of Nagireo!
One thing I was wondering, what do you think of Nagi (foreshadowed) future slump?
I feel like things will get dire for him, and I can't help but wonder how Reo would react.
Nagi feels very... emotionally immature and while Reo can be very fiery and we saw how emotional he can get, he's the one that feels more in touch with his own emotions and has better life experience.
For better or worse, being away from Reo forced Nagi to confront his own feelings more.
I wonder if Reo won't realize they got back together too early and leave him (this time maybe more amicably? Or maybe force himself to leave him) for his own sake.
Ego's dialog feels very ominous... they were very happy in that moment but there is a very sense of "now what?".
thank u so much, i feel like i never express myself well enough esp with characters and relationships im passionate abt so that means a lot 🥺
yeah i get what u mean about nagi's emotional immaturity...in the latest match, when isagi asked him how he was able to make his best play yet a reality, nagi  didnt really understand what had happened. he only wanted to beat isagi, that has been his first goal, the first step to achieve the bigger dream he shares with reo. 
and while he himself couldnt see that, reo was the first to notice despite everything that happened between them, so he created a chance for him to have a 1v1 with isagi. 
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the problem is that, as isagi points out later, if u dont understand how u made something happen, you probably wont be able to be consistent and replicate it (this has been a recurring theme of blk since the start of the manga):
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a goal that u only made happen because u had the person who knows u the best and is your closest friend give you exactly what you need in the moment, has little value in the grand scheme of things. Without a clear goal and reo’s help, nagi wouldnt have been able to do something like that. 
So the next step he should be taking is working on his weapons, instead of relying on the perfect opportunities reo can provide him with.
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maybe its time for nagi to try and catch up to reo, and not only in terms of play-making 
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but also in terms of self awareness 
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i also love the fact that while reo can seem completely selfless when he declares this, he is also completely selfish, cause at the end of the day hes doing this for his dream, for himself. he loves playing with nagi and making him score goals, but his hard work which got him to where he is now doesnt rely on nagi being there, he hasnt abandoned himself in favor of nagi. 
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BUT he still seems to always choose nagi over anyone when they are playing together and even though my shipping heart is tempted, i think thats not a good thing at all... cause their cooperation may be top class, but it also makes them predictable after a while. 
reo has learnt to play without nagi, but he needs to learn how play with nagi without forgetting everyone else on his team. 
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so the way i see it, reo has made more significant progress than nagi, but he still needs to work on seeing the bigger picture when nagi is by his side.
nagi on the other hand has even more things he needs to work on. he shouldnt feel reassured bc of that one (miracle) goal or bc he managed to beat isagi once. if he ended up satisfied with just that, then he wouldnt belong in the world of professional players
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Ego is right when he said that confidence and delusion are 2 different things. Nagi needs the power that will enable him to fight alone in any situation and to obtain that power, he has to confront his feelings, his weapons and his shortcomings. and that demands soul searching, practice and a lot of thinking, all things i bet nagi thinks are a pain pftt.
but i want to be optimistic and think of this as another challenge he (actually, both of them) will have to conquer. im very conflicted though, cause the way i see it, what reo needs to work on now requires them to be on the same team, while what nagi needs to work on requires alone time.
in conclusion, things may have worked out between them in terms of understanding each other, but im hoping they start understanding themselves more; acknowledging their weaknesses and taking the necessary measures to overcome them. 
i do think that reo the way he is now is more likely to realise what needs to be done than nagi, whose issues are the most urgent in my opinion. so i can def see them going their separate ways for a while again, whether its reo making that decision, or nagi, or both of them together (with the latter being the ideal for me).
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mephew-j · 1 month
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hi! i saw your NiD where jackel (I hope im saying his name right) was like an older sibling to reala and NiGHTS, my question is how do you think the Nid turner into nights journey of dreams.
I have a theory that wizeman when he finally got nights he removed his memory same with reala and made diffrent body (aka the journey of dreams form) but wizeman was not too generous with jackle (again sorry if I say his name wrong) and ends up "getting rid of him" so that reala and nights won't reamber or have a hint of reambering jackle.
but when wizeman made Chamelan, that's when they reambered something, they reambered someone but they keep it to themselves.
do you have a similar thoughts of this? I'm quite curious as I don't see a lot of people talk about it
Thank you very much. It´s so nice to get feedback – I´m glad you like it.
You have an interesting theory, indeed.
Honestly, I have several theories about what happened to Jackle from NiD to NJod:
First one, the comedic approach and not my theory (but I really like the idea), is the one of “Roger van der Weide” with his youtube video “nights journey into dumbness” which I remember from my early teen-years (the video was uploaded in 2010, holy wow!!!).
It´s a parody of the NJoD game.
In this one Wizeman gets fed up with Jackle and after Jackle mumbles “… more like Dumb-man” he gets forbidden to appear in NJoD.
Another theory is that these two games take place in two different universes - Jackle simply doesn´t exist in NJod.
The most realistic theory, however, is that Wizeman simply killed Jackle after failing to defeat and capture Nights (boss battle in NiD).
Jackle is categorized as second-level, and we have seen what Wizeman does to second-levels in NJoD if they dare fail him (he literally crushed Donbalon and Bomamba on-screen with his bare hands). So yeah, RIP Jackle.
I think the only exceptions to that punishment are the first-levels – Wizeman didn´t punish Reala after failing to keep Nights captured in NJoD, nor did he plan to wipe Nights from existence (he wanted to keep their body, just wanted to exchange their mind).
Then again you could argue that Jackle is a special case or that his mantle protects him even from Wizeman – but I dunno.
Personally, I don´t draw an exact line between the two games, nor do I really stick to the storylines either.
I tend to rather use certain characters and parts of the world itself and create “new” stories in my head.
Some of these stories, or AUs, I put on paper (like the one where Jackle is commissioned to raise Nights and Reala) while others remain in my head.
There are AUs in which Jackle is the “main-character”, others in which the role goes to Reala or Nights. Some of the stories are fluffy and whimsical, while others are quite bloody and/or dramatic. Sometimes Selph plays a role in them (usually as the counterpart to Jackle, as Nights is to Reala  ,  or in other stories Selph is the counterpart to Wizeman).
(long AU, man)
The most fleshed out AU with Selph for example is in which Selph is Wizeman´s counterpart; while Wizeman reigns over Nightmare, Selph reigns (or rather watches) over the rest of the dream realm (somewhat similar to Nights) but they are in the position of a god.
Selph had been the first one to create life – the Nightopians – to live in the dreamt-up worlds of the visitors.
Nightopians consist of light.
Wizeman followed suit, except his creations were absence of a free will (third-level nightmarens).
Nightmarens consist of light and, depending on their level, a certain degree of ideya. While third-levels consist of light only (which is why they can reproduce with Nightopians (Mepians)), second-levels have a certain amount of ideya put into their creation.
He quickly found that his creations, other than himself, were not only capable of leaving the nightmare-dimension, but also enter, or rather infiltrate, the dream realm AND that they were able to cause harm to the residents and visitors and take something very important from them – ideya.
Ideya is the power the visitors bring along and that has the power to create new areas/new worlds (the dreams you can enter through the big doors).
Wizeman had always wanted to reign alone, and with the ideya, he would be able to extend his nightmare realm until the darkness would have even swallowed the last bit of the dream world. And who knows how far he´d be able to go from there…
Selph didn´t notice nightmaren intruding dreams at first – they were alone, and there were so many visitors with so many dreams, and Wizeman sent his nightmarens strategically.
Once noticed, Selph did their best to keep the ideya save within the dreams of the visitors, but they couldn´t be everywhere all the time and they refused to steal and use the ideya themself to create stronger Nightopians to help her cause.
The creation of second levels followed soon after the first ideya was obtained – they are more autonomous in their acts but still can´t think for themselves (they can´t think “logically”); overall they are still reliant on being told what to think and what to do.
Assigning this increasing number of nightmarens soon became an extremely time-consuming task – too much time, even for an immortal god.
Wizeman needed a creature that would lighten the workload, that could think rationally, logically and could both issue orders and carry them out itself.
He made his first attempt in creating a first-level nightmaren – he created Jackle.
Unfortunately, though, Jackle was not at all what Wizeman had in mind – he was visibly flawed.
Something had gone wrong, and Wizeman was angry – not at himself, but at his creation.
His newest creation in hand, Wizeman intended to crush his miscarriage immediately.
“Wait, Master!” the creature shouted pleadingly “One chance, Master. Give Jackle one chance: one night. And Master will be pleased. Yes?”
Wizeman stared at his failure.
Even looking at it made him feel uncomfortable.
And yet, the god responded “One venture! And do not disappoint me!”
This creation had taken up a lot of resources; light, time and, most importantly, precious ideya.
It was clearly a failed attempt, but if he would take it to the test, he might just find out WHAT exactly went wrong, what parts of it were usable and what needed to be made different next time.
When Jackle returned, Wizeman had no expectations of him.
Jackle held out two orbs of ideya to his master; a result to be expected by a second-level. Wizeman was unimpressed until his creation suddenly started cackling and pulled out several more ideya from his mantle.
When it was tasked to order other nightmarens it performed as well. In unconventional ways, sure, but it brought the relief Wizeman had intended.
Jackle got to live.
It wasn´t what Wizeman wanted, but it was functional, and it brought results.
Jackle soon began mentioning that he would be seeing or hearing things from time to time; that these phenomena would increase and be so much clearer when he was occupied with his cards.
Wizeman, though, shrugged it off as woolgathering; Jackle was defective after all.
One day Jackle and Selph encountered each other.
Selph immediately knew what was standing in front of them and tried to expel the nightmaren from the dream it had invaded.
Jackle however didn´t think of leaving.
The entity, trying to remove him, looked so much like himself, but more human, and it was so small compared to him. An intriguing creature.
He dodged and evaded the entity´s attacks, always staying close to it to get a better look.
Selph noticed the other´s gaze and stopped their attack.
After they had drawn some distance between themselves, Selph vocalized “You are a nightmaren, one of Wizeman´s creations,” they inspected the figure opposing, “… but there is something different about you: you examine me, as I examine you, you don´t fight back, the other´s mindlessly do” , Selph now stared into the nightmaren´s eyes “ What exactly are you?”
What Selph had just muttered was more of an outer monologue, they didn´t really expect an answer as none of the other nightmarens had ever answered or spoken at all, but this one opened its grinning mouth and responded
“Jackle.”
Selph opened their eyes widely, jaw dropped in disbelief.
The nightmaren laughed.
“You speak…?”
“Don´t you, too?” Jackle cocked his head and hunched his shoulders.
Selph hesitated before they blinked and lightly leaned forward “Again, please.”
“Don´t… you, too?” Jackle smiled confusedly.
“No, your… your name.”
“Jackle…?”
Selph didn´t know how to respond.
“Your name?” Jackle asked after a few seconds had passed.
“What?” Selph´s thoughts had drifted off in an attempt to apprehend what was happening and what that advanced nightmaren would mean to the dream world; what even the more worse it could do compared to the other nightmarens they had encountered thus far; were there more than just this one?
“Jackle would like to know your name, too.”
Selph cought a breath before straightening themself and darting a stern glance at the nightmaren “I am Selph.”
Jackle, not intimidated by that gesture, cocked his head again and widened his grin as he slowly hovered around the other, taking in every detail he could detect.
Selph cautiously watched the nightmaren, anticipating an attack.
But there was none.
Jackle stopped in front of Selph and looked them right into the eyes.
He cackled and then said “We look similar, but you are no nightmaren… What exactly are you?”
Selph looked at the others face and tried to read its intentions.
They then decided to take their time and hover around the nightmaren as well, taking in its form. Though, there wasn´t too much to look at, really.
Only when Selph had finished their circumnavigation they answered, “I am a god, just like Wizeman.”
Again, the reaction wasn´t quite what they had expected; the nightmaren giggled and replied, “A small god!” Jackle made a gesture with his hands to show how small they were.
Selph was dumbfounded and Jackle obviously found that amusing.
After their odd first encounter they met occasionally, randomly really, until they actively searched for the others company. Neither of them had anyone to talk to out of their own realm, so they talked to each other and started spending time together.
Their acquaintance eventually turned into friendship (whether their friendship turned into love, depends).
Both knew how dangerous it was spending time together; what would happen to Jackle if Wizeman found out, but they were two lonely souls who craved company – neither the Nightopians nor the visitors were the same to Selph as Jackle was to them, and neither were the other nightmarens and especially not Wizeman to Jackle what Selph was to him.
They both had an understanding for the other´s situation, so Selph never prevented Jackle from collecting Ideya and conversely Jackle never hindered Selph expelling the other nightmarens from the visitor´s dreams.
They both found themselves unable to change their situation and the roles they had in it.
Selph had been asking Jackle many times whether his cards had showed him any other possibility – he always negated.
Until one day Selph declared happily, they had found a permanent solution to their issue: they would flee into the world the visitor´s come from and live there.
(I´m still unsure as to how it would be possible for beings from the Night Dimension to pass into the Wake World – I mean, there is technically a possibility given in the mini-comic series by Archie but… it´s not like they ACTUALLY explained. It too would have been possible for me to just say “it´s possible with ideya”, but Selph wouldn´t use ideya; not even for escape.)
Anyhow, once they had managed to open the portal they were confronted with a problem: in order to keep the access stable and open, one of them needed to stay in the Night Dimension - they were to power sources to that portal; without at least one power source the gate would dwindle and then disappear. Then no one could escape.
They were quick to find a solution – Selph should go, they were stronger, they were the one to have the most knowledge of the Wake World and the visitors living there.
“Once I am through, I will open the portal from the other side immediately,” Selph promised “If anything prevents me from doing so now, I will do my utmost to open it as soon as I possibly can.”
And with that, Selph entered the portal and was gone.
Jackle waited a few more moments before closing the portal, then he waited.
He waited several hours but nothing happened.
He got nervous, worried something might have gone wrong. He giggled anxiously, shuffling his cards, hoping they would tell him something, tell him Selph was fine. But there were no answers to his unspoken questions.
After what felt like an eternity, he had no choice but to face the possibility, that something might have gone terribly wrong.
That Selph might not have made it.
There was no new portal.
There was no hidden message within his cards.
There was no nothing.
The night had only begun when they had started their escape – now it was nearly over.
Jackle had no choice but to resume collecting ideya.
If he´d show up without ANY, it would mean his demise.
With a heavy heart he left the area and entered the nearest dream.
Every single night, he would return, and hope to find an indication of Selph´s doing – Selph themself, a new portal, a message, an aura, a simple evidence of their presence.
He would always be disappointed.
With a rupturing hole in his chest, he carried on.
One day, Master Wizeman called for Jackle.
“I have a special task for you,” the Master announced, but didn´t amplify as he scooped ideya with one hand, and light with another.
Then, he let both hands collide and held two others underneath to make sure, no resource would get lost in the process.
He started pugging the radiating mass with all his six hands.
Once it had become one homogenous mass, he separated it into two and began to form it.
Jackle observed the process silently as he was trying to shield his eyes from the brightness with one hand.
The master took his time and Jackle wouldn´t dare to make a single sound.
He knew what he was witnessing; he knew the master was creating new first-level nightmarens.
Once the master had deemed his creations to be finished, he let them rest in one of his hands for a moment.
Jackle tried to take a closer look, even if it hurt his eyes, but wouldn´t dare move from his spot.
They were creatures reminiscent of human babies: small in stature, a big, round head and four small appendages.
Jackle dared to glance over to his master who was still inspecting his creations.
Suddenly the master took the creatures between two hands and sunk them into the black sea that was running underneath them.
Jackle couldn´t help but gasp as the creatures vanished into the void.
The blinding light they had emitted, had now been suffocated by darkness.
The sea began to bubble up and the master only recoiled his hands once it had started boiling aggressively.
With staring eyes and a gaping mouth Jackle anticipated the result, but the master hesitated to part his hands.
Did he fear another failure, or did he already know something had gone wrong again?
Jackle held his breath as the master finally revealed the outcome: two squirming and whimpering figures, so small, they were barely the size of his own hand. Their eyes were closed and their bodies in fetal positions facing one another. Their little hands reached out feeling for the other, and only when it was the others body, they would clutch onto whatever there was.
To Jackle it looked like these two bodies seemed to try to coalesce back into one being; but their weak efforts were of no avail.
Still, he couldn´t shake the feeling that what he saw were the most seraphic and wonderful creatures he had ever gazed upon.
He felt so full of vim and utterly delighted, he hadn´t noticed how his usual grin had grown into an enormous smile that only found limitation by his face.
He felt his eyes getting wet and tried to blink away the forming tears.
This hadn´t been the first time Jackle had been crying of joy, but usually it had been because of laughter that had gotten out of hand – but he had never felt anything like this before. Not even when he had been with Selph.
He couldn´t wait for his master´s allowance to approach his youngest siblings; he just had to get near them, see them from close up, carefully touch their small forms.
In awe he inspected the two nightmarens from as close as he could possibly get without touching them or the master´s hands – he knew he couldn´t risk going any further without actual allowance.
“Take them,” the master´s orotund voice reached Jackle. “Raise them to be obedient and reverent nightmaren.”
He reached out to touch his siblings´ small bodies.
“Yes, master,” Jackle whispered.
He traced the silhouettes of their little heads carefully with his index fingers and was overjoyed when their little bodies started cooing and their nervous squirming slowly subsided.
To Jackle, it was love at first sight.
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quackitytheduck · 11 months
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pleaaasess share the notes please 🙏🏻
sighs. well i guess i have to give the people what they want. also ftr i stopped at the end bc i realized the point i was gonna write was inapplicable ill explain it at the end
"it's not about the SPICE it's about quackity's own character development!!
1. wilbur has been gone too long and not only would he not know about what quackity's gone through everyone else on the island would have moved on wo him!! he hasn't spent the time alone on the island that the rest of the islanders have. and you might say ohh that's irrelevant as both quackity and wilbur have both been wo their kids longer than the rest of the eggs have been gone, and to that i say sure but wilbur is going to have to adjust to the realization that his kid (and chayanne who he had a close relationship with) have been KIDNAPPED and the islanders (including quackity) have been left wo knowledge of what happened to them which imo is much different than having a kid die. and quackity still has an emotional connection to richas so he's losing/lost MULTIPLE kids and that's something wilbur just won't be able to keep up with!! and
2. there's no telling what would've happened if wilbur hadn't left but it's unlikely quackity's resentment and loneliness would've just gone away which is what caused qq to get drawn away and kidnapped at the cellboier wedding in the first place!! replacing tilín with another family, esp with quackity's almost manic attitude towards getting a brand new family would never have worked at "fixing" or healing qq because it ALREADY HAPPENED WITH RICHARLYSON after wilbur left, not just tallulah!! so it's entirely likely that qq still would have been kidnapped which would've led to elq replacing him which wo a doubt would've given a complete 180 to their relationship!! u could argue wilbur would see through the facade and realize it wasnt the real qq but lets be honest what could he have done about it? baghera + others already had it figured out in the first few days and they weren't able to do jack shit about it bc of the federation's sheer power over the island. even if wilbur ran for president and won which is doubly unlikely it's clear the presidential position doesn't have much real power over what happens. and not even mentioning the wedge the presidential campaign wouldve put through q/elq and wilbur's relationship (that wasn't already put there by elq's existing attitude). to put it simply qq's kidnapping and elq's replacement of him would have left a nigh irreparable gash between them and when qq spontaneously came back what do u think would've happened??? how much of tallulah OR wilbur would qq be able to remember??? and as we've seen w richas he can't read signs and therefore would've more or less ignored tallulah as an inconvenience, and do u think wilbur would've just taken that??? would wilbur still like him if qq didn't remember the pain and anger that tilín's death gave him that would've made him want a second chance w a new family in the first place??? and
3. this is the point i think about the most tbh and it's that quackity's arc doesn't completely fit in with wilbur. for one wilbur doesn't have a complimenting character arc (or any arc at all!!) that would leave to both of them having a satisfying journey + conclusion together, and two qq has/had a similar relationship to romance that early days dsmp!q had, where he constantly searches for something to make him feel whole and the only two things he can think of to fix that is 1. a romantic relationship (see his aggressive pursuit of qwilbur in the early days
listen the point is there is TOO MUCH that wilbur has missed"
yeah ok that open parenthesis at the end is bc my second point there was gonna be forgiving himself and getting another chance to prove he can take care of something and that opportunity in this case could potentially be provided by a partial caregiver position w tallulah. and now im having a diff thought that qq already has 1% parentship of richas and. well. we all see how that turned out. so i think he just needs to reach a point where he can see the path he's on and muster up the self control or courage to be what he needs to be. and if that's not triggered by richas then then its not gonna be by tallulah now. really tho its up to himself
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nixxongoshikin · 1 year
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Breakfast In Bed | Soft promises
[ Sanemi x OC ]
Angst, Demon slayer manga spoilers, OC x cannon
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Sanemi loves breakfast in bed, although he hates the process of Kimiko leaving his arms when she woke up to go make said breakfast. He hated (loved) when she basically squirmed her way out of his grip and basically wrestled with him to keep him in bed so she could go make her surprise for him. This would be the first year Sanemi and Kimiko's child, Yuki, could help(barely) with making breakfast in bed for her father. Sanemi also loves the soft moments he gets with his wife and daughter. He truly does.
Sanemi had been, clingy this past year. Kimiko had just figured it was because after the birth of their child, Yuki, it pulled those soft paternal instincts from him. Especially with how close Yuki looked to Genya, with the same dark hair and dark purple eyes.
While the sun was setting on their nice family outting, Kimiko adjusted Yuki in the sash that was wrapped around her. Sanemi held onto Kimiko's hand once she had finished doing so.
"You know, I don't understand how Yuki is getting so big already. I figured she'd take after me a bit more. but she's so big for her age." Kimiko giggled as she held onto Sanemi's hand, her fingers running over the small nubs of his first two fingers before interlocking with the last few fingers he had on this hamd. Looking up as he pulled her hand up and gently kissed her knuckles, he let out a soft voice that really wasn't familiar for 'Sanemi Shinazugawa'. "Does it matter all too much? It just means she's going to be strong when she gets older she can help her mama around the house." He laughed softly, his eyes where so soft as they just walked towards their home on the hill. It was, put away. Surrounded by trees but not too far from the village, it was just a short walk that Yuki always fell asleep on. "you say that cause you're not the one carrying her." Kimiko huffed as she adjusted Yuki, Sanemi only could make a dry sarcastic laugh at that comment. "I did offer." "you didn't want to put the sash on, you would have dropped her." Kimiko replied after than he could make some snarky reply. Causing him to shrug his shoulders and let out a laugh.
Sanemi stopped for a second, making Kimiko stop as she looked back at him with a raised eyebrow. Sanemi took a step forward and gently kissed the top of her head. "I love you, I love you so much. You know that?" She was a bit taken aback, blushing softly before she smiled softly. "Yeah, you've been telling me you do quite a bit recently. Any reason for that?" She giggled softly as they kept walking and Sanemi just shrugged his shoulders. "No, no real reason."
Then that was it, that was the conversation. They laid Yuki down to bed, then went to lay down themselves. That night, Sanemi had been extra.. attentive, to her body. Putting her pleasure above his that night, granted they both enjoyed it. Once they finished Sanemi just wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her into him. Gently snuggling into her as he listened to her speaking.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry im leaving you and Yuki so early. I'm sorry I won't be able to watch her grow up.. im sorry I'm forcing you to do this alone." He spoke softly as he closed his eyes, head pressing against the crook of her neck. His eyes closing as he let out a soft breath, it was so soft. He hadn't been going to sleep, but he was praying. Maybe for the first time in his life after the gods took genya away from him. But still, he prayed. A soft, pathetic begging prayer that she'd be okay without him. That Yuki would grow up strong, safe and loved. All in a world without him.
Kimiko woke up the next day, just as usual. She smiled softly as she messed with Sanemi's hair. Not getting the same groan of a response she'd normally get as she squirmed out of his arms. His arms where holding onto her so tightly, but she didn't have to fight with him to keep him in bed this day. She just got out of his grip, got changed, got Yuki cleaned and changed as they planned to make Sanemi breakfast.
"it's papa's birthday today isn't it? How old is he again? I can't remember is he one year older than me or two." Kimiko hummed out as she sat Yuki down in her high chair, making sure she was safe as she giggled. "Don't tell daddy I forgot his age yeah? It's our secret." Young Yuki only giggled In response as Kimiko put a finger to her mouth and make a small "shh" making Yuki do the same motions with her finger and making the same noise causing the girls to laugh.
Kimiko made Yuki her breakfast, feeding and cleaning the girl once again as she finished up Sanemi's breakfast. Yuki walked clumsily with a glass of juice in her hands as Kimiko held the platter of breakfast in her arms. Making sure Yuki was okay as they walked. "Sanemi? Time to wake up sleepy head~!" She called out, "He's never slept this peacefully before. I wonder if he's still tired from last night..maybe breakfast this early isn't a good idea." She thought as she opened the sliding door to their room as Yuki walked in. Kimiko set the breakfast down not understanding how Sanemi could sleep through all their noise as Yuki crawled over to Sanemi and began to shake him slightly.
As it dawned onto Kimiko what day it was, what year it was, she couldn't help but kneel down to Sanemi's body. Gently shaking it with Yuki as the baby continued to babble not understanding why her father wasn't waking up. Kimiko's eyes began to slightly water as she gently pulled Yuki away from Sanemi, her hand moving up to her eyes trying not to cry. Yuki's confused babble being the only noise in the room as she was confused.
November 29nth, Sanemi Shinazugawa died in his sleep. At age 25, he left his wife a widow and his child without a father.
"I should have been able to stay for longer. What kind of father and husband leaves their loving wife and child alone like this? I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, I don't expect you to ever be able to forgive me. Next time we see each other, I'll try to fix this. I promise. I'm sorry. "
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emissary-of-the-moon · 11 months
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So im back to thinking about my little 'modern' au (heavy air quotes) so yall get to listen to me spitball ramble about the timeline (will i ever actually use the timeline in anything other than referencing it? Probably not, also adding ages, will probably be prone to editing)
Time:
Current age: 41
Birth year: XX02 (mid-summer)
Story Notes:
Age 11- Time's stort still plays out mostly the same with a few minor tweaks. He was raised by the Great Deku Tree in Kokiri Forest, Great Deku Tree is attacked and dies, Time leaves the forest and meets with Lullaby who tells him about her dream about Ganondorf and how her family won't listen. Lullaby intrusts the Ocarina of Time to Time, he gets the Sacred Stones and goes to get the 'Master Sword' only to be put into a 7 year sleep.
Fighting stuff, Ganon is dead (and he stays dead, Time is the only one that deals with him) Lullaby sends him back in time with proof (i dont care what it is its not relevant) of what Ganondorf is going to do. Ganon is executed, Lullaby resigns from her title now that she believes her duty is done, Time recollects the masks he originally collected from before he was sent back in time.
He gets to live an easy life for quite awhile with Malon and Twilight, up until the war where he joins in and ends up having to resort to Feirce Deity resulting in the markings and damage to his eye.
Twilight:
Current age: 23
Birth year: XX20 (early fall)
Story Notes:
Age 18- Twilight just so happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time and ended up getting roped into the war against Hyrule. He was at Ordona's springs after a fight with Ilia for pushing Epona too hard again when Zant had shown to incapacitate Ordona and rid them of their light. Ordona was able to fend off Zant, who was already magically exhausted after dealing with the other three light spirits, but not before Zant cursed Twilight into a perpetual wolf form.
Not long after, Midna, also already cursed by Zant, had arrived and was informed by Ordona about what had happened. She agreed to help restore the light spirits with Twilight under two conditions, she be told the location of the remaining fused shadows, and the light spirits help her to unbanish the rest of the Twili from Hyrule.
Tldr Wolf Twilight and Imp Midna restore the light spirits as quickly as possible, briefly fight alongside Warriors, Ordona hold up their end of the deal, and Midna uses the fused shadows to aid the Hyrulian forces at the tail end of the war. Ordona and the other light spirits reversed the curse on Midna and removed the cursed object from Twilight. Twilight gets to keep the shadow crystal.
Warriors:
Current age: 26
Birth year: XX17 (mid-spring)
Story Notes:
Age 21- Wars was definition 'idk what to do with my life after school' and joined army and then got wrapped up in war.
Four:
Current age: 17
Birth year: XX26 (early spring)
Story Notes:
Age 12- Invasion happens, Vaati turns Rune to stone, Four goes to the Lost Woods looking for the 'Force Gem' (essentially the Four Sword and Light Force in one, but its just physically the gem from the hilt of the Four Sword blade), Four is split into four + his shadow, un-stone Rune, Vaati is delt with, Four keeps the gem.
Only Rune and Smith know about the gem + it causing Four to split.
Wind:
Current age: 16
Birth year: XX27 (late summer)
Story Notes:
Age 12- Aryll gets kidnapped, Wind sets off with Tetra (they were docked at Outset to restock on supplies). At one point well looking for Aryll they dock in Hyrule, Wind sneaks into try to get supplies but ends up getting left behind as Tetra and the crew have to flee (Tetra continues looking for Aryll). 'Wolfie' (and by proxi Midna) find Wind at the docks where he's almost ambushed and gets 'taken in' by the two, later meet up with Warriors who they've fought along side with a few times up until this point. (It's just about the end of the war at this point)
After everything is all said and done, Tetra sends Linebeck to go retrieve Wind and bring him back to Outset (she didn't want to leave Aryll and his Grandma alone).
Wild:
Current age: 21
Birth year: XX22 (early summer)
Story Notes:
Wild and Flora were out of the country on a school trip when invasion happened. He did still get wrapped up near an explosion, which left him with the scars and some memory loss.
Met Legend and Ravio when the two were traveling.
Legend:
Current age: 20
Birth year: XX23 (late fall)
Story Notes:
Mother died not long after birth, leaving him and Fable with their father, who went AWOL and took Fable with him cause he was convinced she was royalty (she is not, he's just mental). Ran off to Lorule (few nations over, Holodrum, Labrynna, and Hytopia are in between) when the twins were about 5 years old, Legend was left in the care of his uncle (mother's brother).
Uncle dies, ends up in the care of Smith (family friend and Four's grandfather). Smith tips him off that he knows Fable and his father ended up in Lorule. Legend convinces him to let him look for them (mainly Fable), Smith takes care of Legend's family house outside of Hyrule Town and funds Legend's travel the best he can (he either agreed to it or kid was just gonna dip in the night). Legend is around 14 at this point.
Legend still ends up doing side work well traveling for more money, meets Ravio at the halfway point in Labrynna they travel back Lorule, reunite with Fable and Hilda, sibling bonding stuff. Hilda and Ravio go back with Fable and Legend to Hyrule.
Pre meeting Ravio, Legend is put into a cursed sleep after touching stuff he shouldn't have and u have the Link's Awakening game play out.
Hyrule:
Current age: 18
Birth year: XX25 (late winter*)
Story Notes:
Age 14- Roolie had been wandering around Hyrule for about a year into the invasion, avoiding as much of the fighting as possible well still helping where he could, went he hit Skyloft and learned Aurora was in a cursed sleep. Dawn tags along with him to help gather anything he'd need to wake up her sister.
Sky:
Current age: 24
Birth year: XX19 (late spring)
Story Notes:
Age 19- He was out of the country with Sun when the war started and was unable to return to Hyrule to help or aid his sisters, due to the border lockdown. (aka I haven't played ss yet and want to stay as blind as possible so idk much about sky's game)
Spirit:
Current age: 16
Birth year: XX27 (mid-winter)
Story Notes:
He's doing his own thing with Phantom, they're living their best lives. Perks of being in a different country than the rest, no horrors of war :P
Hyrulian War: XX38-XX40
^name is a wip might leave it as is
Current time is 3 years post-war (XX43)
*end of calendar year ~about December time
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milo-is-rambling · 2 years
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Don't want to sleep bc when I woke up this morning it was too early so I went back to bed and spent like two hours falling in and out of sleep and in and out of a dream about my dad where he was alive again (weird as fuck to say that cause it still has not actually clicked in my brain that my dad is dead) and he kept trying to do things in the dream like go to sleep or go into a different room and I was like talking him out of it and I kept my eye on him constantly so he couldn't leave and it was like he got away from me and went to bed or something and the second he walked out of the room we were in I woke up and then I just kind of stared at my ceiling feeling bad for like an hour and it fucking sucked and my mom wasn't home when I got up again cause it was like noon and she had a work lunch today and left at 11 so I was home alone with my dog and I had that dream and then felt really truly alone and I realized that my dad dying fucked with my already bad abandonment issues and like I know that he didn't die and leave me on purpose obviously but like he's missing from my life now and he's not gonna be with me through all these future experiences I imagined having him there for like I'm not dating anyone and haven't dated anyone like long term serious recently so he's not gonna be able to ever meet the person I truly fall in love with or like be at my wedding and he's never gonna be able to have a Christmas together with me and my future family or even have grandkids and my dad loves kids and my neighbor (his best friend) has grandkids who knew my dad and like I played with them in the pool and we hung out a lot this last year and there's one kid who has the same name as my dad so they always said little bill and big bill for my dad and his friends grandkid and next time they come to visit we have to tell them something happened to big bill and he's not gonna be around anymore and it just fucking sucks. Death sucks Greif sucks I keep saying y'know "love doesn't go anywhere" "the pain of grief is just all the love you have to give still" "blah blah blah you're supposed to cry" but like I can say it as many times as I want I am still definitely not dealing with this at all. I barely legitimately cry about it like I'll drop like three tears when a specific song comes on Spotify shuffle but I haven't cried hard really and I avoid looking at pictures of him or anything or letting myself have any emotion about it and I think it's bc of this big huge shame monster I have in my chest that I call my heart but it truly does not let me experience emotions around other people like god damn I didn't realize how bad it was like I thought I had more control over it and I was just being edgy or whatever but I legitimately cannot handle crying in front of another person even my mom who I am the closest with out of anyone in my life like it's just me and my mom and millie and that's my whole fucking world and even with them I just can't let myself cry or feel actual emotion and the second I start crying I immediately lose all sadness I had cause my body just turns it off like someone fucking turned off a faucet like I cry a little bit completely alone when im driving and I can't really fully let it out cause I need to focus on driving that's the only way I can cry anymore cause even completely alone I am judging myself from my head and won't let myself cry and I keep trying and trying and I just do not know how to let myself cry and I feel like I have this giant inflatable swimming pool filling with so much water that it actually rips the plastic and explodes that's what I feel behind my eyes and nose at all times it's one big emotion blob right there and I can't fucking let it explode no matter how hard I try and I've been fucking trying. I rewatched all my crying shit and haven't been able to get an actual breakdown started at all it's pissing me off I want to just feel my feelings so I can work thru them but also every time I cry I feel so much shame like how do u fix that so I can cry really hard for like two months straight
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buckyhoney-library · 3 years
Text
nsfw alphabet, b.b
A/N: so sorry it took so long! hope you enjoy! sebastians & nomad!steve should be out sometime this week(end)!
reblogs/likes/feedback are greatly appreciated & highly encouraged
However, do NOT repost/steal ANY of my fics on my blog!
Warnings: 18+, language, smutty thoughts, sorry for any missed typos!
chris evans nsfw alphabet
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A = Aftercare (What are they like after sex)
bucky takes aftercare so seriously! he makes sure that you have everything that you need and you're taken care of first. showering you in praises, holding you close, getting you water or snacks- he is at your beck and call.
B = Body Part (Their favorite body part on themselves and on their partner)
thighs. thighs. thighs. He loves laying between them with his head resting on your stomach. His fingers tracing patterns on your skin- peppering kisses on the inside. bucky's arms are hooked around them while he is giving you head, rubbing small circles on the outside.
bucky has grown to love his vibranium arm, because of how much you love it. he has changed arm usage from a weapon to a useful tool in every situation. being able to cool it and playing with temperatures, pinning you down- making sure you go nowhere- or even being able to cause it to vibrate.
C = Cum (Anything to do with cum)
he loves to paint with his cum. as much as he LOVES to cum inside you and make you hold it- there is something so pretty with his cum plastered on your back or on your tummy. "you look so pretty with my cum on your thighs," bucky is especially fond of watching it drip down your breasts or leak down your thighs. bucky just stares in awe of how it glistens against your skin.
D = Dirty Secret (What do they secretly want)
he wants you to praise him. bucky lives off of praise and when you whimper how good he's making you feel or how he's such a good boy? it throws him over the edge, encouraging him to go faster and harder. he'll never ask for them, but when you start hyping him up, fuck he enters a state of nirvana.
E = Experience (Do they know what they are doing?)
1940's bucky as we all know was very experienced but after eighty years of nothing? he needs a little help regaining his confidence, but man will he practice and have no problems asking for help. he'd be a little embarrassed of cumming early or not being able to satisfy like he used too, but bucky watches porn and experiments like no tomorrow, catching up on all the new toys/techniques/positions etc.
F = Favorite Position (Self-explanatory)
bucky's favorite position would be cowgirl or where you're laying on your side, so he could hold you. cowgirl because he gets the perfect view of your body and everything about it.
with an honorable mention of missionary- but missionary with your legs in the air spread for all can see. if he's feeling a little spicy, he'll press on your lower abdomen, adding extra pressure.
G = Goofy (Are they serious during sex or goofy
BOTH. There is a time and a place for serious, rough, passionate sex (and boy does he enjoy that), but for the most part, Bucky wants you to feel good and he wants to learn- which means there will be some mishaps and failed moments, but he loves those moments just the same.
H = Hair (Are they well-groomed?)
he is well kept and clean. bucky isn't hairless, but he does make sure that everything is trimmed up and clean.
J = Jack Off (Do they masturbate?)
bucky only does when you're away or he's gone for a mission. when you're home, he has no problem telling you he's in the mood. when he does masturbate, it is to your pictures/videos you've sent or through facetime/phone calls. he doesn't watch porn unless that is the only option or he is looking for new things to try with you.
K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)
oh boy does he have loads of kinks! bucky loves praise (receiving or giving)! during the more passionate and rough sessions, he is into degrading (but not too crazy) innocence kink. if you have met after his second sexual awakening? god, how he loves to ruin you. he loves the idea that he gets to teach you and that you're at his mercy. ice play/warming (idk what the word is) he loves when you call him sarg does this man have a filthy sarcastic mouth. dirty remarks of comments that leave his mouth- god, it's enough to you off in seconds.
L = Location (Favorite place to do it)
he is a traditional man at heart, so he loves the bedroom. bucky gets to be as loud as chooses and go as long as he wants without the fear of someone walking in or interrupting.
M = Motivation (What turns them on or gets them going?)
leggings. jeans. short shorts- anything that enhances your thighs or when you shoot back firey/witty comments matching his energy. The more traditional turn on's as well, suggestive comments, touching his chest letting it fall to his belt, lingering kisses on his lips and neck. "it's like you're begging me to fuck you silly,"
N = No (Something they will not do. Turnoffs.)
nothing with bodily fluids (other than saliva or cum) & i don't think he'd be fond of being too open in public- he's a private guy, but he doesn't mind the simple pda and light touches.
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skills, etc.)
okay let me tell you- bucky loves getting head. your lips make him cum faster than anything else. "open wide, darling" he loves the ability to do it virtually anywhere (privately of course) and the quick clean up-but he mostly loves watching you take his length completely, hitting the back of your throat. "fuck, such a good girl taking all of me," hearing you moan into him and gag makes him go FERAL. bucky isn't a head pusher, but he does grip your hair.
bucky does love going down on you too. his cock throbs at the sight of your legs shaking and squirming. the sounds you make encourage him more, but he doesn't stop when you cum- he licks up every last drop of you. "im not stopping, so i'd stop moving if i were you," he'll occasionally pop his head up to make sure that he's doing everything right and you're enjoying yourself- the last thing he wants is for you to fake it (which only happened when he first re-entered the dating world)
P = Pace (Are they fast or rough? Or slow and sensual?)
there is a time and place for everything. bucky loves sensual sex because he feels the most connected to you and he has been without physical/emotional connection for so long that it's become a must. it is also where he feels the most control and the best, when he can be 100% vulnerable- something never thought he could do.
fast and rough is for those needy moments where he can't get his hands off of you- complete feral mode. when you've been teasing him relentlessly and he needs to remind you who's in charge. those nights are when the kinkiest of kinks come to play.
Q = Quickies (Their opinions on quickies rather than regular sex)
quickies are reserved for dinner parties, group outings, etc. where you look too good and he can't keep his hands off of you. "i wanna see if you taste as good as you look". quickies usually consist of fast rough sex that leaves bruises or marks. they also mainly consist of giving/receiving head.
R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)
oh does he! he has almost ninety years of sex trends/toys/etc to catch up on. it will be the middle of the night and you'd be fast asleep only to be woken up by him shaking your arm and going "baby, we have to try this!"
bucky isn't a risk-taker in the sense of public and potentially getting caught, he is a risk-taker in the sense that he is willing to try anything once.
S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go? How long do they last?)
bub is a super-soldier. his stamina outlasts yours by HOURS. you'd be panting and lying sideways and bucky would be ready for the next round and you'd have to tap out. he would chuckle and hold you, teasing you about how you can't last. "can't handle this cock? i thought you said you could go all night?"
T = Toys (Do they own or use toys on themselves or partners?)
bucky has a whole drawer dedicated to the greatest quality toys. "only the best for you, dollface." he loves seeing how far he can push you with the vibrators. tying the vibrator to your clit and watching you be sent over the moon. bucky wouldn't be too crazy about using toys on himself, but he isn't opposed to being handcuffed (or pegged)
U = Unfair (How much do they like to tease?)
BIGGEST TEASE in the galaxy. Touching you, grazing your heat, kissing your neck, rubbing the inside of your thigh, (stuffing a vibrator inside you while you're on the phone), or whispering dirty things in your ear- but God forbid if you tease him back. there will be hell to pay if you try teasing him back. "you better rethink your next move, darling," "i think you forgot who's allowed to tease who."
V = Volume (How loud are they? What sounds do they make?)
bucky is pretty quiet, with the exceptions of grunts and whimpers. His mouth is filthy and he dirty talks like there is no tomorrow! he is also a cocky little shit and sarcastic- which doesn't stop in the bedroom. "your cunt feel so good around me," "open your eyes, i want you to watch as i ruin you" "look at you, you're soaked for me"
W = Wildcard (Random headcanon for your character)
cockwarming. babe lives for cockwarming. early morning lazy sex, but too lazy to pull out of you. you'd be laying on your side with your leg over his, with his cock buried inside of you. "no, honey, just stay" he would mumble with his head resting in the cook of your neck, placing small kisses on your neck, but falling back asleep.
X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants)
baby, that serum did wonders. bucky is packing that seven to eighter. his cock would poke through your tummy and he won't stop talking about it for weeks.
Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)
HIGH. VERY HIGH. he is ready whenever and wherever the time calls.
Z = ZZZ (How quickly do they fall asleep afterward?)
bucky's stamina is so high that he probably is starving. he would perform aftercare for you, but once you'd have cared for- he is standing naked in the kitchen making a sandwich.
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cheelduh · 4 years
Text
How to bet your way into someone’s heart. (Highschool AU)
Pairing: Childe x fem!reader
Warnings: Fake weed. Poor Signora smh. Oh yes, lots of swearing. UNEDITED ASF IM LAZY BYE.
Synopsis: Childe is being an infatuated idiot, Lisa has eyes for vending machine chocolate, and Kaeya is desperately in need of a pencil. With all these distractions, there’s no way in hell you’ll be able focus on the task at hand.
This is crack.
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I don’t have time.
You think as you race down the hallway, shoes slapping against the floor as you expertly dodge multiple students in your way.
Bullet. You're as fast as a bullet, because everyone around you is a blur and you don't stop, can't stop, not until you meet your target.
It's funny how one can accomplish many challenges and feats they were unable to, merely due to pressure. Pressure is a twisted ugly thing that can gnaw its way into the pit of your stomach and grow like a parasite. Pressure is a parasite that can either bring the best in you, or the worst, but at the cost of one's peace of mind.
"Move it Signora!" You shouted a warning at the senior blocking your way. There wasn't any time for you slow down at that point, and you'd risk bumping into the breakfast club's stall if you swerved to the side, sending juice flying everywhere.
Signora's eyes widened momentarily, getting the gist albeit her anger, and choosing to back up flatly against the locker.
Her lipstick nearly slips from her fingers as you swerve past, a thick gust of wind in your wake.
It messes with the hair she woke up two hours early for.
Signora plots her revenge. You still don't have time.
You nearly kick the door to your home room down, but you can't risk the perfect image your teachers have of you. So you pat down your t-shirt, take five tempting deep breaths, and tentatively knock the door.
The door opens and you're met with a young man, familiar amber pupils welcoming you.
You try not to huff and puff at the cost of your stamina. Thinking back, there's no way in hell you could have physically been that fast.
"Good morning Y/N," Your homeroom teacher gives you a small smile, moving aside to let you in. "Class is just about to start."
You check your watch, then turn to him with an apologetic tone, trying not to crack under the eyes of your classmates. "I'm so sorry Mr.Zhongli, I slept through my alarm."
Your idiot ass forgot to set one because you studied till four in the morning.
"You're like thirty seconds late, cut the shit." Beidou boos from the back, causing your stance to stiffen.
"I don't wanna hear it Beidou. If anything, you're two periods earlier than usual." Ningguang calls her out for you, but you have a feeling it's more so on behalf of a personal vendetta.
Ignoring the two bickering, Mr.Zhongli gives you the handout. "Take a seat. Do not fret over such minuscule things dear."
Relief washes over you. Your impeccable attendance is not on the line.
Childe tries to flag you down next to him but you send him a pointed glare and sit next to Lisa instead.
"You should give him a chance you know." Lisa doesn't even have to open her eyes to know what's going on.
"Please," You scoff, digging through your bags to collect your notes. "As if I have the time to fool around with a shady kid like him."
Your friend sighs in disapproval, and makes no move to take out her own notes as Mr.Zhongli begins the lecture on the Archon war.
"You should really pay attention." It bothers you that she doesn't, but then again it's not your place to tell her what to do or not to do.
"I don't need to." She yawns, blinking an eye open towards you. "I have you after all."
"I'm tired of saving your ass." You groan and pull a pen out of your pocket to get started on the exercises as Mr.Zhongli talks in the background.
The course outline contained all the topic, and you made sure to teach yourself as much as you could before class to stay ahead.
Immersed in the worksheet, you blinked away your sleep and tried to answer as many questions as you could at the moment. You didn't hear the slight shift next to you, and the change of breathing, or the rate of which time went by.
A familiar scent makes its way into your nostrils.
"Lisa. Why do you smell like mango juul juice." You know the scent from when Signora blew a mango flavoured fog in your face yesterday at lunch when you said you were hungry.
A chuckle erupts and you freeze in place. "That's because I'm not Lisa."
You blink. Once, twice, and then crane your head to the side to meet a pair of teasing cerulean eyes.
Fingers loosening in shock, the pen drops on the desk with a short thud.
You whisk your head towards the front of the classroom, and Mr.Zhongli is nowhere to be seen.
"There's no saving you now." Childe's smirk widens, and he scoots closer to you. "Mr.Zhongli had to get something from the staff room. The staff room is near the cafeteria."
"Which is also near the merch stall." You grumbled, bringing both hands to massage your temples as a headache is beginning it's reign.
"Tsk tsk. Smart girl. I'd like to add that he's forgotten his wallet in his office as well, which is in the south wing."
"Son of a..." You mutter underneath your breath, and opt to scoot further back, but your efforts are futile because your desk is in a corner.
Your next beacon of hope is Lisa, so you scan the room full of chattering students, only to find her pestering her crush, Jean.
Shit...there's nothing getting you out of this one.
"What did it take?" Is your only question, the despair starting to brew. How much did it take for your best friend to betray you?
"A dollar and fifty for vending machine chocolate."
You take a moment to breathe, calming your nerves and burying down the urge to screech. "What will it take?"
"For what?" Childe replies back innocently, and you can't believe how fast he can change masks. You almost give in.
"For you to leave me alone."
"Aww come on girlie," He whines, closing in the distance. "Don't be so cold."
What did your mom tell you that one time? Oh yes. That if you were ever backed against a wall, then just break the damn thing down.
Too bad it's figurative. You're just about ready to sock him in the face if you didn't know he was into that sort of thing.
"I'm serious about you," He says, and it sounds so real, so genuine, nearly makes you sputter. "See? I've even bought school supplies.
He unzips his light backback and spills the contents on the table.
A lone piece of paper flies out, a lighter, and a mechanical pencil with no lead that follows straight after. There's also a pocket knife that you choose to ignore.
You're not the least bit surprised.
"First of all, how the fuck are you passing this class. Second, do you really think I'm into nerds?"
"Well, considering that you are a nerd—"
"You're making things worse."
"My bad, my bad." He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. "But on a serious note. I'll do anything."
You cross your arms. "I'm not just another one of your conquests Childe. It's not like I have the time. There are better things to do."
"You need to relax." He says so simply, with complete disregard as to what you are trying to say.
"I am relaxed." You reply, picking up your pen to continue your work. If he's going to annoy you, then you might as well get shit done while he's at it.
You're not wasting any more time.
"When was the last time you got a full eight hours of sleep?" His voice is soft, too soft, and it's not at all like the Childe you know.
Your pen stops momentarily, but you will yourself to continue writing. The words look fumbled, but you don't care. The best thing to do is get your work done and ignore the idiot next to you.
"C'mon, Zhongli won't be back for another half an hour at least. Let's go." He kicks the bottom of your chair to urge you.
The pen shakes in your hand, and you narrow your eyes at the paper, digging holes into poor question eight. "I'm trying to work here. Let me work." You'll say anything to get him off your back.
"Fine fine fine..." He raises both hands in mock surrender. "I'll stop bothering you."
Your ears perk up at that, and you turn to him so fast he has to hold in his laugh. "Really?"
"Yeah," Childe nods along, bringing your hopes up. "If you win a bet, that is." And they're back to ocean level.
You roll your eyes. There's always a catch. That doesn't mean you're any less interested.
"What's the bet?" You ask curiously, all your focus now on him. Just as he longed for from the very start.
He flicks a thumb towards the door, leaning closer to whisper next to your ear. "We bet when Zhongli comes back."
"Are you kidding me?" You aren't bothered at all at the close proximity, mainly because you're too tired and only care about the freedom that will come with your win.
Childe, however, is a completely different story. His heart is beating a thousand times a second, but his face doesn't show it. Not one bit.
Kaeya leans in from the seat behind you two, interested in what's going on. "Ooooh secrets."
"Shut up Kaeya." Childe and you monotonously drone in sync, still having your little staring contest.
The captain of the skating team smiles, about to ask—
"No. We don't have an extra pencil. Even if we did we wouldn't give it to you." Childe finally breaks his gaze to scare off Kaeya.
Kaeya raises a smug brow, and leans back in his chair like the jerkwad he is. "Then don't let me keep you two love birds."
That's all it takes for him to earn Childe's unwavering respect and loyalty for as long as he lives.
After the two are done creating an elaborate handshake as a mark of their newfound friendship, you decide to just forget about the handout. It's not like you're getting anything done anyways.
"Anyways, back to the bet." Childe says, resting his cheek on his fist as he stares at you dreamily. You try not to break under his gaze.
"If I win, you have to go on a date with me."
"No way in hell—"
"Then I'll bother you for the rest of highschool."
Highschool is eternity. You don't want to live through an eternity of this.
"Fine." You answer, and for the first time he sees genuine fear in your face, it makes him waver slightly. Not enough for him to pity you.
"If I win..." You trail, thinking loud and clear as you ignore the excited chatter of your classmates. "I want you to pay attention to class."
"What?" He exclaims incredulously, blinking in disbelief. "I thought you'd get me to stop talking to you altogether."
"If you're paying attention in class, you don't bother me as much and your grades go up." You grin smartly, and oh archons it livens his entire day up, and it's only nine in the morning.
"You care about my grades?" Childe bites back a smile.
"Not at all." You lie, and quickly look away. Woah the floor tile looking trippy.
He decides it's better to get on with the bet without causing you any more distress. After all, you've given him such cute facial expressions today. He's feeling quite generous.
Pulling out his cracked-as-shit latest model phone, he unlocks it and tinkers with it a bit before turning the screen towards you.
"We'll be using this to time both of our predictions at the same time. Whoever has the closer time to when he finally swings by is the winner." The rules are simply put, no room for error.
You tilt your head in confusion. "Why am I seeing a slime review?"
"SHIT!" Childe fumbles with his phone, aggressively tapping on the screen. He lowers his head and voice as if he's been through fifty consecutive hits in the face. "It's uh, Teucer's account."
"Yeah...okay." Is all you can say.
"Ok what do you bet?" He changes the topic to unfuck the situation.
Putting a finger in your chin, you think for a minute, calculating the average of all the times Mr.Zhongli has left the classroom for a considerable amount of time.
"Fifteen minutes." You're sure of it. It's like clockwork every day.
"Hmm..." Childe crosses his arms, seemingly in deep thought. "Five minutes." He places his bet, and both timers start simultaneously.
Five minutes?! Is he serious?
You laugh inwardly. This challenge is in the bag.
The sense of victory you feel dulls when your ears pick up the echo of footsteps nearing the classroom.. Both your heads snap up to the doors.
There's something scary about Childe once his competitive side comes out. "Looks like I've won." He turns to you, eyes darkening evilly.
"What? There's no way in hell a ginger is right." Your palms are clammed up, eyebrows furrowed in panic. You calculated every single variable, how could this be?
You race to the front, Childe right on your tail as the entire class clamps up. The footsteps get louder, causing even whispers to become total silence.
Then it hits you. The shitty music about getting bitches and bars playing on the other side.
The door is swung open by Childe, and you're face to face with an idiot sophomore with a speaker in his pocket.
Childe’s grin is long gone, and you sigh in relief.
The false alarm encourages the class to return back to their idle chatter.
"Scaramouche?" Childe spits, narrowing his eyes at the unamused boy. "I thought it was Signora's shift today."
By "shift" he means being a complete dickwad and scamming fake weed to students in return for their souls. It only really works on the freshmen.
The only reason the club still runs is because Signora threatened the principal with some sus pictures she snapped of him and his assistant.
"Apparently she had an emergency." Scaramouche explains, lowering the volume on his outdated beats pill. "Something about a hair appointment because she got ran into by a, and I quote "lecherous imbecile.""
You steer clear of the conversation, finding the whiteboard far more fascinating and worth your while.
A loud cough is heard from behind the kid, and you're met with a crestfallen look on your beloved teacher's face.
You go through a whiplash of emotions, becoming completely numb towards your loss.
"They were out of slow cooked bamboo shoot soup." He sighs, handing a stack of papers to Childe, who is wearing the fattest smirk on his face at his victory. "Please hand these out to your classmates Childe, and we will begin shortly."
You check down at the timer despite knowing who’s won. Five minutes and twenty five seconds. Somehow, you don't feel as dejected as you thought you'd feel.
Maybe the date will be fun. Maybe Childe isn't so bad. Maybe...you do have time to indulge in these sort of things. If he’s so hell bent on getting your attention, perhaps it’s possible that you can make some room in your heart for him.
However, all those thoughts fly out the window when Childe hands you the new worksheet.
“I hope you're ready for our date tomorrow. We'll be sparring till sundown, and after you’ll be feeding me with chopsticks." He winks, and it makes your heart flip even though all you want right now is to go to the bathroom and barf your guts out.
Feelings are complicated.
You smile back at him nauseously, tight lipped and all, then you pull out your phone, go on maps, and search for the closest cliffs to jump off of.
After he's done, Childe slouches back in his original seat with a different kind of enthusiasm, and opens up his messages. He texts Zhongli a "thank you <3".
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klonoadreams · 3 years
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was thinking about uzui and his little starburst mark on his eye and how he either A. draws that thing onto his face evry day if its facepaint or makeup or B. its a tattoo he was able to seamlessly cover with makeup to go incognito and how that implies he fucked up the kamaboko gangs makeup on purpose. possibly to protect them from creeps/keep them out of trouble but also maybe cause it amused him. and now im thinking about what if he ends up doing a visibly better job on andous makeup
I AM SO FUCKING SORRY FOR HOW LONG IT TOOK TO ANSWER THIS ASK, SO LET ME JUST ANSWER IT NOW
honestly, it does fucking feel like Uzui did it on purpose and while they could've all gone nuts, it was also, AGAIN, on purpose.
Meaning Uzui likely did it to protect them, but also because it amused him. Two birds, one stone.
I mean otherwise, he would've left Inosuke alone, which would've been IDEAL, BUT WHOOPS. LET'S NOT RISK THAT.
After all, he just needed them to find his wives. However, Andou is a special case, because she is FROM Yoshiwara already. Everyone knows of her, because she is so distinctive, from her hair, to her eyes, to her skin tone and beauty marks. Even now, people still talk about her mother. Despite how many years have passed since she died.
More than that, as the survivor of the massacre, Andou is someone that won't likely be forgotten. So once people get clue of her return...WELL.
Daki ain't ignoring that.
Back on that makeup, the only thing keeping Andou from being bought so early is Uzui's good looks, because of the dazzling affect it has on others. The only one immune to it, really is the Okami-san of Ogimoto House, who has a sharp eye for things.
Leaving poor Zenitsu on his lonesome as he's all, "Oh no, I'm the ugly one!!!"
Although reminder, these boys now will likely have longer hair by this point, so...OOP.
(do expect Uzui to smack down any creeps that try hitting on Andou when they're passing through the streets in order to get her and the boys in one of the brothels)
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queenattheopera · 6 years
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Opening Number, Part 5
Prompt: This is the story of the band that skyrocketed beside Queen and how their singer was fated to be with one of them.
Warning: Cussing and implied smut
If you want to catch up with previous parts they’re linked on my Masterlist in my bio
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January 1, 1971
If it weren’t for the enticing smell of food I don’t think I would’ve considered leaving my bed. Sitting up I could feel my head pounding. I grimsed and closed my eyes. I refused to move for a few seconds. I could feel the intense pounding in the back of my head, it me a few deep breaths to find some relief but i knew that wasn't going to last. So I tried to redirect my attention to recalling what happened last night.
I took some shots, danced with Fred, and then I made out with someone. I couldn't seem to remember who it was but I remember how their hands felt as they roamed my body. I remember their lips exploring just as much as their hands did. I remember the smell of alcohol in their breath and how intoxicating their scent was. I sighed and opened my eyes. The noise in the kitchen hadn't stopped but I was too nervous to see who was causing it.
Who do i want it to be?
As I pushed myself off my mattress, I was met with nothing but cold air. I pulled the comforter off the bed and wrapped myself with it. As I'm tried taking the first few steps away from the bed frame I began to limp. Sore could barely describe how my legs felt. As I try to move further the blanket gets caught on something, not caring enough to find out I decide to yank it. I heard something fall but it didn't sound broken so I continued to make my way towards the mysterious figure in my home. The closer I got the more anxious I became. I could feel my heart begin to race. As it sped up more and more, it was all I could hear. I was about to turn into the kitchen when they stepped out.
I froze and forced myself to make eye contact with the them.
“...Noah?”
“I was wondering when you would get out of bed.” My stomach dropped. I don't think i slept with him, right? Not that he's not attractive, but he's my best friend. “Are you okay? You left really early last night, I mean I don't think you got any sleep going from the bags under your eyes.” I don't want to look at him because I felt beyond embarrassed but I need to know what happened last night.
“Wait so we didn't..?” He was silent for a few seconds before beginning to laugh, “Wow you must have been fucked up if you really thought that we would ever do anything.I mean no offense-” Before he could finish I punch his shoulder. “Shut up!” I feel my face growing warmer but I was relieved that he wasn’t the open who I had slept with.
“What the hell are you doing here anyway?” He walks towards the dining room but I don't make any move to follow him. “Cmon, at least take a look to see what I did.” Rolling my eyes I begin to make my way over while trying to hide the extremely obvious limp with the comforter. I'm sure he noticed after he snorted but he didn't say anything.
“Ta-da! I made you a birthday breakfast!” Seeing the table setup my eyes begin to water. He had made all my favorite foods and there were even a few gifts in the corner of my room. I looked at him and he had the biggest proudest smile plastered on his face. He was admiring his work but his smile disappeared when he saw that I began to cry.
“What happened? Did I do something wrong? I mean I know it's just me but I remember you told me not to tell anyone else and that you usually celebrate alone. I just thought you would like this.” I laughed at his rambling and wiped the tears away.
“It’s fine Noah, It's actually perfect, I just haven't really had a party or anything since my parents passed away. I- um Thank you..” His demeanor changed, and instead of getting a look of pity, he smiles and gives me a hug. “Why don't you go clean up and get dressed so we could eat and you could open your gifts okay?” I nod and go back to my room.
Walking back towards my room I see a puddle, I guess when the blanket got stuck I had knock over a glass of water resting on my nightstand. Bending down to pick up the glass I find a piece of paper under my bed.
Sorry I couldn't stay love. Let me make it up to you. I’ll pick you up tonight around 9. -hbsdcbaib I reread the paper a few times, then I just stared at the smug as I tried to decipher whose name was written.
I want to scream. I feel nothing but anger towards myself. If I hadn't spilled that water on the note than I would have known exactly who the I slept with last night. Instead my lover is faceless.
There was nothing I could do but wait. I grab some clothes and head towards the bathroom. Before I entered, I let the blanket fall than close the door. I standing in front of the mirror I take in every detail. My eyes look much worse than to what Noah had led me to believe. Then there was my neck and chest. I was covered in bite marks and hickies. When I turned to step into the bath tub I could feel some tenderness in my hips. Looking down I see bruises, resembling someone's hands. When looking at my legs, I’m met with two more hickies.
Ignoring the achiness I take a hot shower. As I'm standing there I think back to last night. I remember the passion and roughness that my counterpart used. When he had me against the wall or when his head was between my legs. He was confident with very move. He worshiped my body. Together we fit like puzzle pieces. I could feel the heat between my legs begin to intensify. I push it away and finish my shower. After I'm dressed I look into the mirror. I know Noah has seen most the marks on my neck but I still had the urge to cover them. I grabbed some makeup and covered most of them. The others were too dark to hide so I grabbed a turtle neck from my closest and changed. Satisfied with eth look I walked back toward the dining room.
“Finally, do you know how hard it was to have all this food but not to be able to eat any of it.” I laugh and sit down across from him. I don't say anything as I grab a fork and stab the food in the plate. None of it ever makes it into my mouth a dn instead just gets moved around. I could feel Noah's concerned gaze on me but neither of say anything. He comes around the table and bends down to my height.
“Did something happen? If something did you don't have to tell me, but just know that I'm here for you. And if it was one of the guys, I swear I'll kill them.” I smile and roll my eyes. “No you won't, you'll have Em do it.” He laughs but he still looks worried. I sighed, i think back to last night. “I was um, um I was almost attacked last night.” I can't bring myself to look up at him, I was embarrassed, blaming myself for what could’ve happen.
“Who?” I look at him and i'm surprised by how intense his gaze his. A few tears slip out, my anxiety and stress had finally taken hold of the wheel. “Don’t worry about it, Im fine, it was nothing. Its what happened after. Roger saved me. Then Brian and John comforted me. Then i slept with someone and I don't even know how. They left a fucking note that I ruined so now I have no idea who it was from. I’m confused and I don't know what to do and my head hurts and -” I couldn't finish my sentence because I began to cry. Well I was actually sobbing. This only increased the pain I was feeling and it made me feel weak and powerless.
Noah holds me and doesn't say anything. He pulls away when I had started to calm down. “Its okay, it's going to be okay. Let's figure this out. You should eat, I'm going to call the gang and Freddie.”
After sitting there for a minute or two began to eat. I don't have much of an appetite but I forced myself to eat and drink a glass of water. When Noah came back he cleaned up and began to hide the gifts. I silently thanked him for still considering how I felt about my birthday. Just as we had finished cleaning up there was a knock at the door. It must have been Fred because everyone else had a key.
I walked towards the order. I was happy when I noticed that i could walk normally despite the ache. When I opened the door the first thing Freddie did was gasp. “Oh you poor thing! Come here love.” Freddie pulled me into a hug. I guess the crying made my makeup run and that's why he gasped. He didn’t say anything. All he did was shush me an rub my back. It was actually really comforting. When I pulled away freddie began to fix my hair. I smiled softly before taking his hand off my hair. I led him inside. “Thanks for coming Freddie, I'm sorry if you were busy, we shouldn't have called.” I didn't want to be another and I wasn't feeling my best. Frankly I didn't have the energy to be my usually bubbly self. “Nonsense darling, I'll always be here for you.” He rubs my shoulder and gives me the biggest smile.
“Alright love, since we dont know whos coming to pick you up, let's get you dolled up.”
“Lets get her comfortable first, Y/n, we know youre probably aren't feeling up to anything right now so here's what we're gonna do. You're going to take some pain medication, take a nap then we'll get you ready okay.” Emily had let herself in and was beginning to take charge. Usually Fred and her would annoy each other but after their silent communication Freddie turned to me and smiled. “She's right love, get some rest.” I looked between the too and nodded. Once I was in my room I began to run last night over and over again. I felt stupid, I got drunk last night for a reason, now I'll have to live with the haunting my actions for the rest of my life.
“Hey y/n, Em told me to give this to you.” Charlie handed me the medicine and sat at the foot of my bed. “I know how you are. I know you're blaming yourself right now but I also know that it's not. You're okay. We're here for you.” I took the pills and nodded. “Thank you.”
In the next few hours while I slept, my house guests cleaned and prepared everything for me. They had set aside an outfit they knew I would like and they spoke about how they would help me feel better.
When I woke up my headache was alleviated and I felt more nervous than ever. I stood up to find an outfit set hanging on my closet door. I put it on and reapplied my make-up. When i walked out of my bedroom I found the gang in my living room playing scrabble.
“Y/n you're up!” I walk to them and Noah gets up and offers me his spot. He then walks away. I turn to the others looking for soe response as to what they're doing.
“It's your turn.” When i look u at them, i realize they are speaking to me. I make a calculated move. Noah comes back with some tea. They don't bring up anything from yesterday and instead play a friendly game of scrabble. Their passive actions put me at ease. I became so focused on the game I forgot about yesterday. It was what Emilly planed. They distracted me, they took my focus away from all the bad and gave me a moment of peace.
Before I knew it, t was 8:50. “Alright y/n, your dates gonna get be here but were going to be in the bedroom. They’ll be here soon. I know you're going to be nervous, but if you ever feel uncomfortable, just know we're here for you.” “Yes darling, and if any of the boys do anything, then ill kick their arses. You know I was pretty good boxer.” I smile and nod. “Thank you, I mean in.” I pull Em and Fred into hug. Charlie and Noah don't hesitate to join. I watch as they walk into the bedroom and close the door. I take deep breaths but I could feel myself getting nervous all over again. I'll admit it's not as bad as before but I was still really anxious. I was spacing in the living room while trying to relax.
I jumped when I heard a knock at the door. I was frozen and I stopped breathing for a second. When they knocked again I let out my the breath I was holding in. I moved cautiously towards the door. I unlocked the door and put my hand on the doorknob. Here goes nothing.
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warmthintouches · 2 years
Text
Him: I want you to be able to have the best sleep ever. Even if I'm not there.
Him:
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Me: Aww
Him: It's true. You just make me so happy and I just want to do everything with and for you 💙💙
Me: You make me happy too, but I also am feeling nervous bc of how much you like me.
Him: why??
Me: I don't know...
Him: just tell me, Is it that me liking you to much is making you feel uncomfortable
Me: yeah I suppose that's it....
Him: Oh 😔😔 okay I'm sorry
Me: I'M the sorry one. I just am not ready for the big feels and it freaks me out. Its too intense.
Him: I know im sorry. You don't have to have big feels. I don't want to rush you into thinking you need to. But no matter what I'm going to feel the same as I do now.
Me: Yeah, but what if im never ready for the big feels? I feel like you're losing out.
Him: It'll happen eventually. I know it will. Cause you came around to telling me you liked me didn't you?
Me: I suppose so? I'm unsure about that. The conversation was different to me bc im always so cautious about everything I do or say.
Him: See so thats progress that mean's eventually you'll come around with the big feels. Or you'll be to afraid of the big feels you leave. That choice and options are on you.
Me: But im already freaked out by how you feel. And I still think maybe I want something more chill or low-key and idk if you want to be like that...
Him: what do you mean by THAT?
Me: I'm just still unsure about it all. Especially when I know how much you like me and im not ready for that kind of relationship again. And I dont want to have to think about the future with someone or have to worry about breaking your heart. I just want to relax and have fun. And im not sure you understand that....or want that. Bc it feels an awful lot like you're trying to "settle down" with me and im not okay with that.
Him: Babe I'll be honest. Yes I do want to settle down with you. But I'm fine with waiting. Even if it's forever away. And yes I do like you a lot. I'm trying to show you that not everyone is like how Nate is. And I do have trust issues I really do. Every morning I don't get a text from you early like you do every once in a while I freak out thinking you're going to tell me you're done with me and can't do this any more. I get myself worked up every day. I truly do. I don't have a problem waiting. I really don't. I can wait as long as you need.
Me: But I don't think its fair that you have to wait for me to feel the same way as you. I don't want to even think about settling down with someone right now or anytime soon. And you're feelings scare me. I know not all boys are like Nate. I just chose to stay with a shitty guy for too long until I couldn't take it anymore. I know you have trust issues too. And I am not sure im going to help. Bc I'm not the type to do big gestures or share big feelings like that. I won't for a long time. Bc I gave too much with Nathan and now im too spent to feel those types of things.
Him: So what are we going to do. Want me to stop being so lovey dovey. Bc if that means we stay in the relationship then I'll do that.
Me: see thats what I mean! You shouldn't have to be someone you're not! I don't know. I am just debating if im ready for a relationship at all. I feel pushed or rushed to feel things that scare me. You shouldn't be forced to not be what you want or who you are. I would hate that.
Him: Do you feel as if I'm pushing you into this?
Me: A little yes. Bc first I wanted to be fwb only, then you wanted more. Then I tried to tell you to take it slow and you're moving very fast with your feelings for me. And I told you I didn't want to be official until Nate moved out but that didn't seem to stand right with you either. I told you I wanted to be relaxed and low-key and you ignored my request by telling EVERYONE that were official, I tell you that your feelings are too much and you need to chill a bit, especially at work, and you DID THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE of that by telling OUR BOSSES and telling me you practically love me... I did not lie to you at any point about my feelings and it felt like you just didn't listen to what I said.
Him: 😳🥺 im so sorry
Me: its...its okay...😐😕 I just tried to make the boundaries very clear and you ignored them.
Him: I don't think its okay. I think your just telling me that so I don't feel bad
Me: ...idk. maybe? I'm frustrated I guess
Him: But I do. I just want us to work. I don't want to break up.
Me: I didn't want to be in the position to have to break up, which is why I said quite a few times I wanted to take it slow bc I wasn't sure I was ready for something like this...
I still don't think im ready for a full relationship like this. And thats what you want so im not sure what to do.
Him: So are we going to stay together but spend a lot less time?
Me: That doesn't seem fair to you. Its not about the time spending together, its about our feelings too. And im not ready to feel big feelings for someone.
Him: It's fine I'll just shut them off. Its not like I haven't before...
Me: ....Josh. im sorry, I just can't be the girl you want or the relationship you want right now and I tried to tell you but it didn't seem like you were listening.
Him: so we're done then, just like that? Bc YOUR scared of MY feelings for you? Bc you can't handle someone treating you like a queen? You're that scared? You're THAT flakey?
Me: I am like a deer in the woods tbh, I hear one twig snap and im gone. I really didn't want it to be like this. But its not fair to you that im still too fucked up to have a decent relationship with you. I am still healing and I can't just jump in to something new. I told you that. You didn't listen.
Him: fucking fine. Im sorry I had actual feelings for you. Im sorry I tried to be a good guy for you.
Me: okay, hold on. Your last statement actually makes me angry. You cannot say that I didn't try to set very clear boundaries from the beginning that you either completely ignored or tried to convince to feel differently about. And you can't make me feel guilty for trying to be honest with you and tell you that this is too much for me. You came in very strong and you know you did and I told you that that kind of shit freaks me out. I also told you im not comfortable with public displays of affection and that big grand gestures were NOT my thing and the fact that you keep forcing me to try and like them wasn't fair. Now im telling you how I feel, im being open. Im being fucking honest. You do not get to make me feel guilty about that.
Him: okay, okay, im...im going to sleep now. Im not sure what to say to that right now.
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