#but also a complete mess tonally lmao

[eeternalferret]

omg my playlist...hey

whoever made this playlist if you are on tumblr i love you. it’s so good there’s so many songs that im like OHHH SO REALLLL YOU GET HIM! i love you I LOVE YOU!!! STREAAAAMM!!!

[littlepetbee]

i've had the house to myself this weekend so i decided to marathon a bunch of movies that have been on my watchlist for aaages. here they are ranked bc i love making lists lmao:

Game Night: this one was far and away my favorite...it's a fun, clever mystery that's also funny as shit. rachel mcadams is the queen of comedy and also waving a loaded gun around like a crazy person. fuckin 10/10, you guys

I Love You Phillip Morris: listen. i avoid jim carrey like the plague - it's nothing personal, his face just irritates the shit out of me. but i'm SO glad i gave this one a try anyway...it was so cute and touching and gay little ewan mcgregor with his gay little earring is genuinely the softest, sweetest thing to ever exist. it makes complete sense that someone would become a conman for him lmao. 10/10

Bullet Train: thee action comedy lbr!! shoutout to @seeinhindsight for reccing this one to me. it was so well done...with all the winding storylines and running gags it easily could have been a tonal mess, but i feel like they knocked it outta the park. also the steady stream of "oh shit this guy's in it too???" was fun as hell. 9/10 just bc some parts made me sad and my movie ratings are based solely on how they Make Me Feel, not any objectivity lol

Attack The Block: my brain the whole time: YEAH BOY(EGA)!!!! an alien invasion movie with a Message and pre-star wars john boyega?? that was always gonna be a slam dunk for me. though i do gotta say watching british movies as an american is always jarring as hell bc there's no guns. it feels like the weirdest kind of unreality. anyways 8/10

This Is Where I Leave You: slowing things down and getting way more Serious here but i was surprised by how much i liked this one (though maybe i shouldn't have been, since dysfunctional families/siblings are kinda my bread and butter lmao). the surprise lesbianism-slash-lowkey-polyamory definitely elevated it, too! 7/10

Shattered Glass: 100% the movie you gotta show people when they try to say hayden christensen sucks at his job bc uhhh he ate that shit up. not to be #me about it, but if that dude can be that fucking cute the whole time and still make me wanna throttle him within an inch of his life, you know he was doing something right. 6/10

As Above, So Below: i was bummed at first when i realized it was one of those found footage horror dealios, but i actually ended up really liking it. and honestly for the setting, i think found footage really was the only way to go. the concept was super interesting and the horror aspects were sufficiently creepy without being enough to give me nightmares, which is about all my babyass can handle. 6/10

Everybody Wants Some!!: yeah the hoechlin 80's movie lol. it was fun! the characters were likable for the most part! the vibes were good! but B's cannot live on vibes alone (that's a bible verse, i'm p sure) so i was left wondering what the Point was. i am not the target audience for hangout movies, i'll tell you that lmao. 3.5/10

so that's the list!!! all in all a very great way to spend a weekend <3

[prettyboykatsuki]

ohhHh hi it is specialgradefckr from the other day! asking on anon because my main blog is in a completely unrelated fandom that i've totally lost the love for lmao.

honestly it was such a mood seeing your reaction bc YES. it was weird!! it was DIFFERENT! it was Some Kinda Mood going on in that fic!!!

sometimes you just. get a neat little idea. a little corner with all these nooks and crannies to mess around in. you light up and you just GO. and what comes out of it seems kinda weird, definitely not what you'd normally write but GUESS WHAT!!

this world has a place for funny little fics! weird stuff!! what is the POINT of being a writer if you are not making your dolls take off their clothes and smash after a suicide attempt and discussions of sexual slavery???

i actually came across your work wayyyy back when i first got into jjk. i read "How To Be A Dog" and i still don't know what to say about it.

the best way to describe my feelings towards that fic is that it's like i got there late to the party. there's some meat left on the bones i haven't eaten. i don't think i've gotten everything out of it.

for example, i had to re-read some sections over again to fully parse what was going on with the reader's curse (i think it was a snake and i am saying that from memory, scout's honor). and the fic spends a lot of time in gojo's POV, which I very much enjoyed!

but most fanfics, especially reader-inserts, stick to the reader POV and are written to be much more immediately digestible than other forms of fiction. you know the characters, you know the setting, let's get to the MEAT of it.

but your fic was like, the type where you really need to Pay Attention to each and every line, because each line does contribute something distinct to the characters or tone. it was so DENSE and i was NOT prepared to run into that while cheerfully looking for noncon gojo/reader porn skjfhglhdsg.

it's rare to find a fic that goes that hard. like if you want your fic to be That Deep you gotta commit to it, you know? and you don't have to do that for a fic to be good or enjoyable, you just do it For The Art, because you see what the fic could be and you want it to be that way. kudos to you.

it was an amazing work of fiction. maybe one day i will have the attention span to read the whole thing and actually feel like i'm understanding everything and the fic will stop haunting me whenever i think about it

anyways apologies for rambling in your inbox, i do hope you don't think i'm too weird lmao i just really like writing and fics. thank you for sharing yours <3

SDFKJSDJKFSDKJ i agree!!

i think like. i love the genre of absurd stuff so much in my media consumption but ive always had a hard time finding space for it in fanfiction. so writing that gojo dark comedy fic was an attempt to make some room for it and try my hand out and it ended up being a person favorite piece despite how insane it is

so i was really happy hearing other people enjoyed it and were rececptive to it bc really whats the point if you can't go and write something completely insane just for shits and giggles you know. sometimes u get a neat little idea and u just gotta go ham on it i agree

ALSO AAAAA !! A HTBAD READER IN THE WILD.... htbad is like. genuinely my magnum opus at least to me. its one of those things where i dont think im ever going to fully recover from it so when people tell me they've read it i automatically feel super emotional.

it is . super high praise to hear that you feel like you get something from it every time you read the fic. im not much of a planner but i really did pour my soul into each and every line of that thing so it means the world that it comes through!!

CHEERFULLY LOOKING FOR GOJO NONCON JHHDSJFKSD WELL YES ... i understand though i think that fic tends to jumpscare ppl in a similar way all the time since its extremely heavy tonally. it was definitely a fic i wrote For The Art if nothing else and definitely a fic i incidentally poured a lot into it. it genuinely always means the world to me to hear good things about it and im so so so elated to hear you talk so highly about it.

THANK YOU FOR READING. AND FOR LEAVING ME SUCH A KIND MESSAGE. i was basically dead on my feet last night trying to do anything but i was extremely happy seeinf this before bed. i hope today is kind to u

[paperhats-and-evil-schemes]

*The Room voice* OH HI MARK!

Firstly I just wanted to say how nice it is to see you back and dabbling a little bit in Villainous again! 💕 It's been a little slow in the fandom these days, so seeing one of my favourite Paperhat blogs come back has been such a treat! I loved seeing that art + paragraph of Black Hat going absolutely feral! So exciting to see what's in store with White Hat again!

If I may, I had a question I've been wondering about... Will the new(er) Villainous episodes have much impact on your current writings? Like new characters for example, or how the main cast's relationships with each other are developing and such like?

Shit dude, I dunno how I missed this ask for so long, sorry for replying late, totally my bad

I DID NAHT HIT HER, I DID //NAHT//

Lmao but anyway, thank you, you're sweet. 💞 As for your question, that's gonna be a pretty definite "no" from me, tbh. As much as I like the new episodes and characters, I don't really have a fitting place for the new heroes (especially considering, as somebody else sort of pointed out, I already gave Flug a different history with a hero and ex-classmate since we hadn't known his backstory yet at the time) so adding characters like Heed and Goldheart seems a little redundant. I could possibly make cameos of the new BHO clients I guess? But I haven't really considered it or anything. My fics were plotted out years ago back when we only had shorts and orientations to go off of, so it'd feel a bit weird to try and change things now.

On the topic of the dynamic between the characters though, it actually in my opinion? feels a lot different in the episodes as compared to how they all interacted in the shorts, orientation videos, older comics, and all that. I'm not saying I dislike the episodes so far, I still very much enjoy them, but the energy between all the characters has noticeably shifted (especially with BH) in a way that I very much doubt I'll be replicating. I actually saw a post a while ago, when I was perusing tumblr (while my blog was still deleted so I unfortunately couldn't save the post and can't find it again smh, pretty sure it was by @petitprincess1 though) that summed up pretty well how BH feels a lot less "involved" with the group shenanigans now than he was in the shorts & orientations, and that extends to how he interacts with the others, too. Like, with the episodes, it's kind of like he's this completely untouchable entity that's a lot more detatched from what his staff are doing, whereas in the shorts & orientations, he was a lot more involved with them, would horse around and join in when they're all messing with each other or pranking, just felt overall more "present" with the group even though he was still, of course, very much the boss. It's that kind of dynamic that I've always more leaned towards when it comes to my fics, and it's what I prefer overall with the characters. (I'm probably rewording these points like trash lmao, but hopefully you get what I'm saying (also hopefully I didn't misunderstand that last part of your question and ramble on forever about the wrong fucking thing HUHUHU))

It'd be way too much trouble to try and keep up with new things or retcon old fic stuff

Anyway, sorry for being a rambly fuck, but yeah, TL;DR, when it comes to my fics, the character dynamics (especially BH) will continue to more resemble the shorts and orientation videos rather than the full episodes. I don't see much point in changing anything I currently have going on just to fit the newer stuff, it just feels like that'd be kinda tonally jarring, ya feel?

[southsidestory]

👀👀 what's ur beef w/ ragnarok?

SO MUCH lmao

Okay, but seriously, the answer is long and complicated, so strap in for this salty ride.

My #1 issue with Ragnarok isn't that it's a horrible movie, but rather that it's a horrible movie within the framework of the MCU. There are many casual Marvel viewers who don't care about the continuity or tone of the larger series, and that's perfectly okay! Ragnarok is probably a very entertaining film for many of those folks.

However, I am not one of those people. I do care (or, rather I did lol) about the hot mess that is the MCU. And Ragnarok just fucked all the characters from the Thor series sideways, along with Bruce. Nobody seemed to notice because it was flashy and fun and lighthearted! The perfect cure to the first two Thor movies, which were dull as dirt except for Loki, if we're gonna be totally honest.

Taika Waititi has been extremely open about the fact that he did not give a flying fuck about the existing canon and that he hates Loki. He was there to make his movie with no regard to the fact that it's within a goddamn series, and it has to make sense beyond its own 2 hours. He's also ableist and sexist af, arguably anti-Black wrt Tessa Thompson, violates his actors' boundaries on set, and generally has an ego the size of Jupiter. But nobody wants to talk about that :))))

Ragnarok is a tonal mess. Serious moments are given no room to breathe, and the humor kneecaps itself because it's overdone. I mean, when Asgard is destroyed--we're talking about the total annihilation of Thor's home planet--we get about 5 seconds to absorb that before somebody cracks a joke. I felt more about the destruction of Asgard while watching Loki learn of it (in the Loki show) from reading a file than I did while watching it actually happen on screen in Ragnarok.

Love and Thunder is currently getting panned for overused humor that undercuts the stakes of the movie, a predictable but poorly executed plot, empty character arcs, and failure to deliver the significant queer rep we were promised. Which totals up to a completely skippable chapter of the MCU.

All of that applies to my feelings about Ragnarok! So, that's my beef a;sdkfjiertj;aslkdfj

[lizardkingeliot]

Fic Writer Questions

tagged by: @lazybakerart thank you! 💖

How many works do you have on AO3?

147 (jfc)

What’s your total AO3 wordcount?

789,230 (i did the math recently and over 400k of this is Queliot fic from the past two and a half years lmaooo)

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

According to my expanded fandom list on ao3 these are the numbers:

Hannibal (TV) (64)

The Magicians (TV) (33)

Supernatural (18)

Queer as Folk (US) (14)

The Exorcist (TV) (13)

The Magicians - Lev Grossman (2)

Vikings (TV) (2)

Historical RPF (1)

Hannibal (TV) RPF (1)

The Walking Dead (TV) (1)

Mænd & høns | Men & Chicken (2015) (1)

Basic Instinct (Movies) (1)

15th Century CE RPF (1)

Hannibal Lecter Tetralogy - Thomas Harris (1)

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

I am going to choose from my Magicians fic only here since it’s what I’m most proud of:

wellspring

time cast a spell on you (but you won't forget me)

as it was

and this is the map of my heart

life fades (but you remain)

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

Yes absolutely. Comments are very important to me and I want everyone who takes the time to leave one to know how much I appreciate them. 💖

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

prooooobably throw your shadow over me. there is zero resolution since it’s a missing scene set in late season 3 and, well..... lol. it’s seriously miserable.

Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve ever written?

Just the one Hannigram AU I think???? I have never been super into crossovers tbh.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

lol yes, but it’s been a while???? although i did get one comment on a fic last year that wasn’t technically hate but it put such a bad taste in my mouth it might as well have been. it’s never a good idea to tell someone you don’t like the way they write a character, regardless of your intent. it is okay to simply hit the back button and move on with your day. :)

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

So much. Maybe too much???? Whatever. I really love writing deeply meaningful and descriptive sex that feels like an entire ~experience for my readers.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don’t think so??????

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yep. :)

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes! @lazybakerart and I collaborated on a Hannibal fic years ago and we had so much fun.

What’s your all time favorite ship?

Queliot now and forever. I have never in all my life had my heart completely fucking consumed like this. I’ve written close to a half million words about these bitches since 4x05 aired and I think I’m physically incapable of stopping at this point.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

That season one AU I started writing when season 4 ended that’s an entire 70k mess sitting in a doc I haven’t touched since 2019. There were some really cool ideas in it (including an alternate mosaic timeline that was like a probability spell sorta?????) and I mayyyyy one day incorporate some of it into another fic, but as a whole I simply do not think it’s worth the effort it would take to make it good enough to post.

What are your writing strengths?

I think I write sex and romance well??? Also: conversations, similes, and sensory language.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Last night I had to describe the suspenders Quentin was trying on. I will probably have to spend an entire day editing that paragraph alone. I can go on for pages and pages about this deeply meaningful and emotional shit and then freeze up when I have to get a character dressed or make them move from one room to the next... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

This is a deeply ironic question for me to answer at the moment because I generally do not do this BUT there’s a moment in the new chapter of a litany of dreams that I’m working on where Eliot says... something. In another language. During a very specific scene. And it just sort of happened???? It’s a term of endearment (that I googled about ten different ways just to make sure I wasn’t fucking it up lmao) and I’m still 50/50 on whether it will make it into the final draft of the chapter but right now every time I think about my heart mayyyybe starts to beat a little faster. Eliot Waugh is a goddamn sap, y’all.

What was the first fandom you ever wrote for?

For this one I will direct you all to this recent tweet of mine lmao...

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

My time cast a spell on you series without a doubt. I am SO PROUD of the work I’ve put into the 200k written for this ‘verse so far. It’s the biggest challenge keeping everything tonally consistent, but so deeply rewarding every time I finish a chapter and read it over and feel like I’ve accomplished just that. I’ve learned so much about my process and who I want to be as a writer from this ‘verse. And I’m so excited about all the messy and emotionally complex stuff I have planned for the remainder of part two. And allllll the other fics I have planned for this ‘verse in the future. 💖

tagging @thelucindac @nellie-elizabeth @akisazame @allegria23 @biblionerd07 @defilerwyrm @imaginedmelody @rubickk7 and anyone else who wants to talk about their fic. 💖

[murasaki-murasame]

Thoughts on Fruits Basket 2019 Ep4: “What Year Is She?”

I’ve been thinking for a while now that, even though this reboot is mostly just an adaptation of the original manga, this episode REALLY goes to show that they’re still taking some inspiration from the 2001 anime, or at least including nods to it here and there, which is interesting.

I actually think this episode might win over people who thought that the reboot wasn’t being comedic enough, though for the same reason it might put off people who liked that the reboot wasn’t as comedic as the 2001 anime, lol. I enjoyed it a surprising amount, at least.

Anyway, thoughts under the cut.

OK first off I just gotta say that I am losing my MIND both over how Funimation keeps posting gifs that are clearly multiple episodes ahead of where we’re currently at, and how we still don’t know exactly how long the reboot as a whole will be. In the short term I’ve just been going through a goddamn rollercoaster of mislead expectations, and in the long term, these sorts of episodes where they adapt just one chapter make me REALLY concerned about whether or not they have a concrete outline for the whole thing, and whether or not they might end up having to rush the parts that we’ve been waiting to see adapted for the first time.

Like, I think this episode was actually really good, and it’s probably for the best that they didn’t try and fit chapter 6 into here as well because it would have been a huge tonal whiplash, but I can’t help but be like “Y’ALL BETTER KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING WITH THIS”.

I’ve been playing it safe and assuming that the reboot will probably just be two sets of 26-episode seasons [so 52 episodes in total], but now I’m even less sure about if that length could actually work in the long run. I guess we’ll see. Thankfully the animation studio actually has a fair bit of history doing stuff that’s longer than 50 episodes and goes on for seasons and seasons, but I guess I’m just paranoid and skeptical about how long this will be.

Anyway, onto the actual episode itself, it pretty much just covers chapter 5, with a fair bit of anime-original content to make it actually fit the length of a full episode. Which also means that it basically covers the exact same material as episode 4 of the 2001 anime, which feels a bit odd. But the fact that they’re so similar also highlights their differences, which goes to show why I wasn’t really a big fan of the 2001 anime, and why I’m enjoying the reboot more.

For one thing, even though this episode technically just adapted chapter 5, it also incorporated the flashback we got from way later in the manga in chapter 68 about how Kagura and Kyo first met. Which is an interesting choice. It’s at least an example of how the reboot kinda inherently benefits from having an entire finished manga to work with from the start, so they’re able to incorporate stuff from a lot later in the series when it makes sense. I think this little addition helped make Kagura a little more sympathetic, even if it doesn’t really get into all of the deeper stuff going on with their relationship that we find out later.

I also thought it was interesting that a lot of the anime-original content felt really similar in concept to the original content from episode 4 of the 2001 anime, I ended up feeling like they were handled more nicely. Like, instead of getting a whole thing of Kagura forcibly ripping off Kyo’s shirt and messing up the laundry, she just walks in on Kyo in the shower, and instead of her basically burning down the kitchen while trying to cook, she just used up all their food and then wound up destroying it all by slamming Kyo into the dinner table. They also had that scene where she helps patch up the sliding doors and she uses some cat-shaped stickers to patch up the holes, but it was more of a casual scene with all the characters, whereas in the 2001 anime it was more heavy and serious and just about Tohru and Kagura bonding. And on that note, we got what I think was a completely original scene of Tohru noticing that Kagura left her bag behind, and going to help her buy groceries, which I thought was a very cute and fitting way to show Tohru being nice to her.

The kinda unavoidable issue with this episode is that I just . . . don’t really like Kagura as a character, lmao. I’m really not a fan of this brand of hyper-manic, shouty, often violent comedy. With Kagura specifically there’s the whole thing of how off-putting [and outdated] the whole ‘girl gets comically violent with the boy she likes’ trope, but in general, it’s kinda the same reason why I also don’t like characters like Ritsu, or Shigure’s editor, or even some moments with Ayame. It’s just not my kind of comedy.

But I did still enjoy this more than either this chapter of the manga or this episode of the 2001 anime. It’s not like they toned down Kagura’s whole, uh, personality, but I think the overall execution was just nicer. It also reminds me that one thing I’ve been really enjoying about the reboot is how it’s really fun and knows how to be light-hearted and cartoony when it wants to be, which you really get a lot of in this episode. Even if it’s not my brand of comedy, it’s still fun to see this sort of anime messing around with silly cartoony animation when it wants to. And I actually did like the little visual joke where Kagura spins Kyo so fast in the air that she starts lifting off like a helicopter. I was honestly kinda worried at first that the reboot would try too hard to be on-model and ‘pretty’ with it’s character designs and animations at all times, but that hasn’t been the case at all.

I’m glad that I’ve been holding off on actually posting about all of my more in-depth speculation about how I think the pacing and stuff are gonna go, because I just keep getting proven wrong every step of the way, lol.

As I said before, I’m still leaning on the safe option of assuming that the reboot will just be two seasons/50-ish episodes long in total, since that at least seems like it’s probably the minimum we should expect, but if they keep up this sort of willingness to take things really slowly, I’m gonna end up really hoping that they plan on having it be a fair bit longer than that.

Anyway, it looks like we’ll at least get chapter 6 adapted in the next episode. I’m curious to see if they handle it like the 2001 anime again, and have it take up an entire episode like chapter 5 did, but we’ll see. Funimation’s posted gifs from chapters 7 and 9 as well, but who even knows if they’ll be part of the next episode at this point.

[jcmorgenstern]

downworlders being turned mundane was like in X3 when mutants were being turned human

….which was also a thinly veiled conversion therapy metaphor ghasldkjfg god this show is a MESS

Ok so I don’t think yall really wanted a rant about Victor Aldertree, and i really really don’t think anon wanted that either, but i am HANGRY (horny and angry) about what went down yesterday SO

The whole point of Victor’s character in 2a, and imo the reason he was interesting, is that he isn’t Valentine and would never consider himself in any way an upholder of those ideas, but he echoes and reproduces the very same prejudices in a more passive way–even though he was, as he claims in a very “but i have a downworlder friend!!” way, engaged to a werewolf. He’s the bureaucratic counterpart to the radicalism that is the Circle, in some ways even more insidious because he isn’t doing some Malachi-esque traitor move, but because he’s built into the very fabric of the Clave.

The Victor of 2a didn’t develop the technology to burn Raphael–he isn’t an extremist–but he would never question, oppose, or really even think twice about its use in an individual circumstance. He’s a politician, not an idealist, a management hoe rather than an engineering kid. He views people as a means to an end, and has no qualms about using Izzy to get information about Clary, but he’s a cog in the Clave’s machine, not some crazy asshole running rogue and doing shit in some abandoned russian nuclear power plant (hello Val, what are you doing here?) and I think he’s all the more realistic and dangerous for it.

Also just to attack it from a narrative point of view: I’m not sure how, in the span of like 3 weeks, he went from being trusted enough by Imogen as a politician to take over in her stead as the HOI to being the lead of the R&D team? Like that is one hell of a quick departmental transfer? And if he was just promoted to that position days ago, how has he been running this multi-million Hydra-esque project for YEARS, funneling away Clave resources, funds, personnel, prisoners, and even PRICELESS ARTIFACTS (Glorious) towards his own agenda?? And Jia “doesn’t know about it?” This makes about as much sense as….ok, everything else that goes on in this show.

I also take major beef with the complete and utter tonal shift in the portrayal of Jia–last season she was a crazy madwoman who wanted to resurrect Valentine (genocidal maniac extraordinaire) for…..reasons?? and then all of a sudden she’s so against this “weapon of mass destruction” (please, please, please never use such a loaded phrase so badly in this show again….it’s not even cartoony it’s borderlining on plain old tone deaf. im not gonna lie i was vaguely offended but that’s just me).

Also sure yeah brownie points for remembering Eva (his fiance) exists, but it would have been great if they’d remembered what Victor said about that whole thing. He wasn’t saying Downworlders shouldn’t exist, should be exterminated, he was saying that while he was sympathetic to them he didn’t believe they were compatible with non-downworlders (which. obviously is borderline eugenicist, so I’m not defending that, but my GOD he wasn’t saying “i love mass extinction”). Also if the man is a medic (albeit a rather ethically challenged one) I think he probably would have picked up on the rather salient fact that using the water supply as a deployment vector for the serum is….just about the stupidest thing ever. They clearly hadn’t done tests on non-downworlder subjects like mundanes or shadowhunters to know what would happen. Maybe this is just the researcher in me but oh my god please teach these fuckwits experimental/RCT design/human trial/deployment design

also ngl i had to laugh at the running theme of “making the only actor on the show who has any real-life hand-to-hand combat ability at all” (Nick is a black belt in…..i wanna say jiu jitsu?? but im probably wrong lmao. he’s a black belt in something) COMPLETELY useless in combat like props to them i guess because that is legit kind of funny

anyway ive been lowkey steaming about it all day so i have like 20 pages more to say on the matter but oh my god @ todd turn on your location i just wanna Talk :)

[sicklylittlesnowflake]

Hi there. Could you write a fic where Jug has asthma and its flaring up but when he goes to use his inhaler he realizes its gone but he doesn't say anything because he doesn't want to inconveniance Fred or Archie. Set during the time he was living with the Andrews. Then Archie finally realizes when Jug passes out or something like that and he ends up in the hospital. Thank you thank you thank you so much.

(It’s been a hot minute since I’ve been into riverdale, but let’s give this ago! S1 bc prompt says so and also bc s2 is a mess lmao..)

Jughead’s asthma was never something he ever had to think about until recently. He had one big episode when he was a child, but after that, he’d just carry around an inhaler and he’d be fine. It made PE a pain sometimes, but Jughead was just unathletic anyway, and it gave him an excuse to sit out of track. Asthma made his illnesses worse than they should be, but aside from that, it was never an issue.

It became an issue when Jughead lost his home and had no means of going to the hospital to get refills, and he couldn’t even get the over the counter ones that didn’t work as well for him because he didn’t have any money. Any money he did have, he used on feeding himself.

Being homeless made everything that Jughead never thought twice about so much harder than they really were. Being homeless made him live day by day, constantly on edge, and each second that went by intensified his craving for stability once again. But Jughead didn’t have a home to go back to, because as horrible and miserable being homeless was, it was better than going to a house that made him feel like he unsafe and unwanted.

And he doesn’t know how it happened, but the light of the Andrews family decided to shine upon him one fateful day and they decided to give him back the stability he lost many months ago. They gave him a bed, a roof, food and warmth, basic human necessities he had been deprived of for quite a while. Jughead was so grateful for what they had given to him, he couldn’t have asked for.

Even refills for his inhaler.

Initially Jughead didn’t think he needed refills. In his 5 months of homelessness, he’d only needed to refill once. Sure he had to make sacrifices and it had been difficult, but he was sure he could do it. Anyway, he couldn’t have possibly asked the Andrews for more. It just couldn’t be right when they’ve given him so much.

Jughead had been fine for the first month he had been living with them, but when a flu hit Riverdale high, everything came crashing down.

He wasn’t surprised when the plague hit him, it was expected after all, with a less than brilliant immune system.

Jughead had woken up a Friday morning feeling like an entire rockslide worth of rocks had pinned him down onto the air mattress, weighing him down and making him feel heavy. His head was the same, a hefty weight that he found it difficult to lift his head from the pillow. And when he did he was greeted by his world tipping over and by a wave of nausea, a rush flooding his body as he hissed in pain.

Jughead tilted his head back onto Archie’s bed and gritted his teeth to brace the pain, then proceeding to aggressively rub at his temples to dry and subside the dull ache hidden deep within his head, unreachable. He was glad that Archie had already gone down stairs, because no way would he have liked the idea of his best friend seeing him like this.

Jughead forced himself upright, despite his world that seemed to pirouette he forced himself to get changed. Cold waves rushed up and down his body causing him to tremor and shake, his hands shaking as he caused the hanger to rattle against the material of the closet. Just as Jughead struggled to get his jacket on, his eyes were involuntarily fluttering shut and he whipped his head to the side, sneezing two relatively small, albeit ticklish sneezes.

Despite the minimal power displayed, the sneezing seemed to have leeched him off all energy for suddenly he felt very lightheaded, and he could feel the sickening sensation of freefalling, but thankfully he had grasped onto Archie’s desk to stay upright. He rubbed  irritably at what he was sure was a reddened nose, which felt awfully rough, uncomfortable with the hot air he exhaled.

His chest felt incredibly tight too. Jughead wasn’t taking in enough oxygen as he would’ve liked, because his lungs physically could not take in anymore at a given time. It made him feel dizzy and weak, and very faint. As Jughead breathed out; with difficulty due to his blocked nose, and when he did out came a whistling noise.

“Fuck,” Jughead cursed under his breath, knowing full well what the issue was. But he was determined to keep it as quiet as he possibly could.

Even the smallest utterance caused Jughead to fall into a brief coughing fit, a fit awfully chesty and causing a whistling noise to erupt from him. Each cough seemed to explode within his chest, causing a hand to shoot up and support his chest to try and ease the pain. He groaned as he finished, sniffling and wiping any irritated tears before heading downstairs.

“Oh my god, dad! It’s 8:00 and I forgot to wake Jughead!” Archie exclaimed worriedly.

“Oh damn it Arch! I completely lost track of time, go get him–”

“I’m here, I’m here, we’re all good,” Jughead interjected, cringing the sound of his raspy, rough voice. His voice was husky and low, on the verge of disappearing all together.

Archie widened his eyes, “Woah, you don’t sound great.”

Jughead tried to mask his panic with a charming grin. “You don’t find my morning voice sexy? Now that’s a shame,” He quipped.

Fred chuckled at that, “Sorry we didn’t wake you earlier Jug–I swear my watch is 20 minutes behind. Look, you should maybe try and get some breakfast..”

Jughead shook his head, the sound of food at all very unappetising and making him feel sick, “No no, it’s fine. We’ll be late.”

Archie’s eyes widened in shock, “Are you rejecting food?”

Jughead scoffed, heading over to the fruit bowl to try and keep up the charade , “Food is very important to me, Archibald, but so is education. I’ll take an apple.”

Fred frowned at this too, his eyes meeting Archie’s with worry for a second, “You sure you’re okay champ?”

Jughead offered him a smile,feeling a little woozy from the sudden hot waves that surged throughout his body, trying to tame his shakiness.  "Of course. Besides, I think the Chinese we had last night has fed me for over a decade.“

Fred smiled softly, worry still laced in his features, “Alright champ, but if there’s anything you need to tell us please do. We’ll get Pops later tonight to make it up to you.”

“Sounds great Mr A!” Jughead said as he rushed out the door, stifling a series of coughs into his jacket sleeve.

“Wait, hang on Jug, wait for me!” Archie protested frantically, yanking his coat on. Just as he was about to chase his scarily enthusiastic friend, he spared a worried glance over at his father, who returned it to him. It left a nervous feeling that something was off.

Maybe his fever has escalated about a million degrees, or he got hit on the head by a meteor that he didn’t notice, but Jughead is not functioning correctly. Because had he been in his right mind, he would have made a dumb ass excuse to get out of gym, and not aggravate his already strained lungs and sickened body, but for some reason he pushed through.

Maybe there was a part of him still in denial. Maybe there was a part of him that wanted to live the lie that everything was fine. Maybe there was a part of him too prideful to give in and accept defeat; that he was sick, and his asthma was not helping. Whatever that part of him was, it truly was moronic.

Because Jughead is running (or, his definition of running, which is a brisk walk in comparison to the likes of Chuck Clayton or Archie Andrews) shuttle runs that don’t seem to end. As each foot lands on the ground he seems to land with a thump, accompanied by another throb in his head and another squeeze to his chest. As he runs Jughead struggled to keep his nose from leaking, hand constantly trying to pinch away or rub into his sleeve. He fights a tickle in his nose, although it is not quite intense that it should coax out a sneeze, its dull and constant.

There was a sharp pain within his chest and every time he breathes he felt like it was slowly cutting into him. Jughead felt like he’s on fire, he can’t breathe and he feels so weak and so exhausted he felt like dropping dead and moving on to the next existence. Everything else is a blur and his hearing fades and all he can hear is the ragged, whistle like tonality of his breathing and the rapid thumping of his heart.

Scorching hot waves rushed through one direction of his body and freezing cold waves rush through the other. Jughead didn’t think he could handle one more second of this. He pulled in, with just enough energy to just about collapse onto the sidelines.

Jughead struggled to catch his breath, feeling faint and dizzy as his lungs would not take in more air, his breaths short and ragged. He began to wheeze as his chest contracted with sharp pain, his hand running through his hair in exhaustion as he tried to recompose himself. His hand shot up to his chest in attempt to soothe himself, but to no avail his chest only seemed to close in on itself even more. His entire body shook vigorously, both from a rampaging fever and lightheadedness.

“Mr Jones! Get up!” Coach Clayton yelled angrily from across the pitch.

Josie suddenly stopped her running as her attention averted over to Jughead, worry suddenly replacing any desire to keep running. She squinted her eyes to try and figure out what was wrong with him.

“Coach? It seems like he’s having an asthma attack–or a panic attack, I don’t know,” Josie said quickly.

Coach Clayton widened his eyes, “Oh, um, well in that case, will you go check on him?”

Josie nodded quickly and jogged to the sidelines where Jughead was panting on the floor.

“Jughead? You okay?” Josie asked softly, kneeling down to his height.

Jughead looked up at her with red, bleary eyes but before he could even open his mouth his body was ravaged by an intense coughing fit. The noises he made where awfully resonant from his chest, wheezy and powerful that they doubled him over, causing violent surges of pain as a result.

Josie widened her eyes and patted his back comfortingly. When he finally finished Jughead collapsed against the mesh fence and breathed in and out to try and catch his breath again, chest heaving.  Void of all energy. He couldn’t stop himself from wheezing.

Josie frowned, “I think you should go to the nurse, Jughead.”

Jughead shook his head, “M'fine.”

She raised an eyebrow in disbelief, leaning in to put a hand on his forehead, he was too tired to try and fight her.

“Jesus Jughead! You really need to go to the nurse!”

Jughead groaned and pushed himself off of the floor, shaking his head all the way, “Im fine, Josie. I’m just extremely athletically challenged.”

“But–”

And then came the shrill ringing of the bell.

And in a flash Jughead was gone.

It takes a while for Jughead to accept it, but the sickness has taken complete control of him.

It started with his body, of course, in the physical sense of it. Now it was his brain, and everything was a fuzzy blur and nothing seemed to make sense.

As he huddled over his laptop, he tried his best to make sense of his words but every thing seemed to jumble together in this horribly incomprehensible jigsaw. The words seemed to cross dissolve in and out and Jughead couldn’t see.

His brain stopped functioning and he couldn’t speak English anymore. Each letter he typed in caused his fingers to tremor. Jughead knew the sickness had won.

Sighing he closed up the computer and packed up, trying to push through the fever and make it out of there. His brain didn’t seem to process anything but he at least knew he needed to get home, and he knew for sure that was going to be difficult.

Everything felt trippy. Jughead felt like he was walking through one of those fun houses, everything distorted and not quite right. When he staggered down the hall he felt like the flooring was shaking, like he was on some obstacle course of some kind because his legs wouldn’t stop wobbling and he felt like he was on the verge of collapse.

Jughead thought he heard his phone buzz but all he could think about was how how faint he felt, and how his chest felt like something huge was compressing it, squeezing tighter and tighter. It was like his lungs was the snowballs you kept compressing and squeezing until it turned to ice.

And even though Jughead made a continuous effort to try and steady his breathing, he couldn’t avert his full attention to it because parts of him was concentrated on the pounding pain in his head, like someone repeatedly banging on walls, and other parts where concentrated on the surges of varying temperatures that Jughead couldn’t handle,

And then he started coughing hard, the worst fit he’s ever remembered having. Because each cough is not only a bullet to his lungs, but a bullet to his brain, his vision blackening and he literally cannot breathe, his entire body was shutting down.

It’s like his entire body has gone into panic mode, and he could hear the sirens screeching louder and louder until his brain screams for help. He can see flashes of red and blue and then he loses control.

Jughead fell to his knees and slid across the floor, his hands clutching his head in pain. Jughead whimpered and groaned until he realisedhe can’t breathe, each breath shallow and he felt so faint and so weak he can’t see. Jughead wheezed, suffocating, he felt trapped. It’s was nightmare.

But through all the monsters plaguing him in this wasteland, he heard an angel.

“Jughead? Oh god, Jughead!”

Jughead felt like he was on fire. He felt like he was aimlessly drifting through space with no oxygen, he could feel himself closing down.

Archie dropped to his knees and examined him, “Jughead? What’s wrong?! Are you panicking?! Wait, wait, shit! You can’t breathe! Jug, where’s your inhaler?!”

Jughead tried to shake his head no, as Archie frantically rummaged through Jughead’s bag, in a futile attempt as there was no result.

Suddenly his reckless scavenging came to a halt when he realised what the issue was.

“You don’t have it? Oh fuck, Jughead! Did you run out and not tell us?!” Archie exclaimed, panic dripping out of his voice.

Jughead opened his mouth to apologise, but a hoarse wheeze was all he could manage. He shut his eyes in pain, convulsing as he struggled to breathe.

Archie’s hands shook as he grabbed for his phone, frantically trying to call for Fred. He put the phone against his ear, each ring seeming to last an eternity.

“Dad? Oh my god Dad, you need to get here right now! Jughead needs to go to the hospital! He doesn’t have an inhaler and he’s having an attack! Please hurry!” Archie cried out, and hung up immediately.

He rushed towards Jughead and scooped him up into his arms, placing a cool hand on his forehead.

“Fuck! You’re burning up! Hang on Jug, Dad’s gonna come soon and fix you up. Dammit, why didn’t you say anything sooner?” Archie hissed, running his fingers through Jughead’s hair comfortingly, although he was really doing it to comfort himself.

Jughead can’t really remember what happened in the next 10 minutes but all he knows is that Archie held him in his arms and refused to let go, staying right next to him the whole time. Nothing in the world could have persuaded Archie to let him go.

It seemed like an eternity. Even though Jughead could feel himself slipping away and getting weaker by the moment he forced himself to stay awake, hang on, cling on to Archie, fighting for each second. Then, his friend’s eyes suddenly lit up as a bright white light flooded the scene.

“Look, Jughead! It’s dad! You’re going to be just fine..you’re alright, you’re alright,” Archie promised, and it was the last thing Jughead heard before he faded out and he was flooded by a beam of white that swallowed him whole.

It was also a beam of bright white that brought him back.

Then the rapid spinning of a fan, and slowly his senses came back and he could hear the spinning motion of it. He felt a mask over him.

He hadn’t quite completely regained control of his sentences, but he could faintly hear Fred talking to what he assumed was his doctor.

“Yes, yes he’s under my wing for now. Just tell me everything he needs, anything at all, just please fix him up,” Fred nodded.

The doctor chuckled, “He’ll be just fine, Mr Andrews. His asthma is not a problem when he has his inhalers, which I’ve asked the nurse to go get for you which she’ll give to you before he gets discharged, I just wonder why he failed to mention he needed them in the first place.”

Archie scoffed, making his presence towering over him, “Because he’s Jughead, of course. It’s what he does best–worry us because he’s shut himself out for some otherworldly reason.”

Archie looked down on him again, worry flooding his eyes until he realised Jughead had waken.

“Jughead!” He exclaimed.

Fred immediately rushed to his side, followed by the doctor who gently removed his mask. “How are you feeling, champ?”

Jughead opened his mouth to reply but the Doctor quickly shushed him.

“Don’t speak son, you need rest.”

Jughead nodded, and looked over at Archie who seemed to be looking at him with a very fiery glare, like he had been hurt and stomped on, his arms crossed and letting out a frustrated sigh. Jughead raised an eyebrow as to ask him what was going on.

Archie scoffed, looking bewildered, incredulous, “What’s going on Jug? What’s going on?!”

“What’s going on is that less than three hours ago I found you suffocating in the middle of the hallway, on your knees and gasping for air! Less than three hours ago I felt my heart drop and shatter into a million pieces as dread devoured me! Less than three hours ago I was holding you in my arms begging you not to leave me because I was terrified you would and maybe this time, I wouldn’t get you back! All because you didn’t say shit!” Archie hissed bitterly.

Archie aggressively ran his hands across his hair and stomped off into the corner, seething in his anger, breathing ragged.

Fred sighed, placing a comforting hand on his son’s shoulder, “Arch, I know you’re upset, but take it easy on him, okay? He’s exhausted.”

Jughead could feel his heart sinking to the floor, suddenly increasingly aware of the damage he had cause, the damage he didn’t think he would cause, the damage he didn’t think he could cause because how can anybody care for someone like him so much?

Jughead reached out for the notepad and pen on his bedside table desperately. The Doctor noticed and handed it to him. The moment the pad was in his hands he scribbled down furiously onto the page, ripping it out of the pad and waggling it ferociously towards Archie’s direction.

Archie sighed deeply, reluctant to get the page but there was an urgency and pleading to Jughead’s eyes he simply could not say no to. He got up and made it towards him, taking the note from his friend and reading.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything. It’s just been a while since I’ve had an actual home and I’ve forgotten what it’s like.”

Archie looked up at him, meeting his gaze and he understood. In that moment they connected, that unspeakable bond they had formed since the sandbox that no science could really explain. All had been forgiven, all was clear, and there was no bitterness, only love.

Archie leaned in and took Jughead’s hands in his and smiled, “Then I will dedicate my entire existence to reminding you what it was like.”

[curestardust]

if you want: (copy-pasting from my previous review cause it didn’t change) well, it’s BNHA lmao / amazing animation / amazing music / shounen / superpowers and heroes / to have a good fucking time

BNHA S1 (x) BNHA S2 (x) BNHA S3 (x)

I finally caught up and now I won’t have new content till Autumn and I wanna die.

Oh well, what should I say about this movie? It gives us some backstory on All Might’s past while in the USA while the main plot is a pretty nice conflict with a surprising twist. This movie takes us out of U.A. into I-Island, a travelling island that houses the world’s most intelligent scientists who create gadgets for heroes. 

The new environment is kinda meaningless though. For whatever reason, the entire class gets themselves to the island for the I-Expo, although only a handful of them take part in the main story. It’s always nice seeing some friendly faces and what messes they get into but the possibilities of this new place; Deku meeting new people or getting some temporary/movie exclusive cool new characters were thrown out of the window. Which is not a huge problem! But I really wasn’t aware that the rest of the class will show up so I was a bit disappointed.

Well, anyway. The story itself was pretty basic but I enjoyed it a lot and I especially liked the message of the movie at the end. There’s nothing new to say about the technical aspects, it’s BONES. The fight scenes were fucking great bruv. [8/10] (x)

Recommend: HELL Yeah! | Yes | Eh??? | Nope | This anime killed my parents

if you want: an interesting take on idol anime / wacky humour / nice cast of characters

Warning for the first episode: turn down your volume to avoid going deaf.

Zombieland Saga was one of the most popular anime airing during the Fall 2018 season. Comedy and cute girls? Hell yeah, I had to jump onto that. 

My enjoyment of Zombieland was screwed however, and in order to warn potentional new viewers I must prefice this: this is an idol anime WITH comedy, not a comedy WITH idol stuff.

Indeed, the comedy got so much hype that I thought the idol aspects of the anime wouldn’t be that prominent so imagine my surprise when a few episodes in we barely had any comedy just mostly the girls bonding and speaking about their future as idols. That was the point I realised that I have been looking at this the wrong way and quickly shifted my perspective (which wasn’t a problem as I also adore idol anime).

I feel sad that I couldn’t enjoy this completely from the beginning but shit happens and here we are.

ZS jumps between 3 emotional states. Hopeful idols, over-the-top comedy and Depression™. It feels like Zombieland Saga stuffed about 50 episodes worth of content in a mere 12. The first few episodes are mostly reliant on comedy and giving us the starting point of the idol activities. From about episode 3 to episode 10 we mostly focus on the idol aspect. Building their brand, performing, gaining fans and all thw while we get backstories for most of the characters. Then in the last few episodes there’s a complete tonal shift to a more bleak and depressing situation, the reason of which I’ll obviously not spoil.

The clashing of genres certainly creates a unique experience which is something we desperately need in today’s anime landscape but it might make it difficult for it to find a stable audience. Well, that’d be my worry except there’s something that saves Zombieland: the characters. The 7 main characters of the story all have unique personalities and backstories which also leads to interesting chemistry between almost every charcater. Unfortunately, due to the runtime of the anime we don’t spend quite enough time on exploring these characters. We are also left quite a few unexplained (and just hinted at) situations.

The ending of ZS hints at a possible second season and I’d be glad to follow these girls on their journey of idolhood further and see some aspects expanded upon that we didn’t have time for here. As to who I’d recommend this to...well, you need to at least not outright hate idol stuff cause there’s too much of it here to ignore. But if you do and you want a more unique take on the genre with a lot of wacky moments and nice characters, well, here you go! [8/10] (x)

EDIT: Oh shit I almost forgot. The music is FUCKING amazing. 

Recommend: HELL Yeah! | Yes | Eh??? | Nope | This anime killed my parents

if you want: everything you’d expect from Monogatari

The continuation of The End, Zoku Owarimonogatari is a story that happens after the last season of Monogatari (Owarimonogatari S2) but before the one that is actually the latest in the timeline at the moment (Hanamonogatari).

Obviously, if you haven’t seen the previous seasons of Monogatari, there’s no reason for you to be reading this. If you have, well, you know what to expect.

First, to quickly get it out of the way, this is a Monogatari installment through and through. Shitton if dialogue, quickly jumping frames, wide still shots, random style changes, fanservice, lots of meta. The music and the animation are also great. It’s all here as you would expect and it brings the same quality as previous installments.

This “movie” specifically is an event that happens after the main story is wrapped up. While I guess, that would be a bit disappointing if it came to any other series, Monogatari has always been built upon random drawn out stories and events, sometimes with no connection to the “main plot”, so this one isn’t any different from those.

I don’t want to go much into the story as the mystery behind it is the whole point of Zoku. Something weird happens as usual, and Koyomi needs to figure it out. That’s all I’m gonna say.

Majority of the main characters appear in Zoku although due to the plot, they offer a new insight into their personalities. Again, hard to talk about without spoiling.

One gripe I had with Zoku is just how much it relies on your knowledge of previous seasons. Lots of places, events and names get dropped all over and if you haven’t brushed up on yout Monogatari knowledge as of late, there’ll be a bit of a confusion as to who the fuck someone is or what they’re talking about. If you have some mild recollection of the story, you’ll be fine, but if you really don’t remember much then...well. This is going to be a confusing ride.

And that’s it! As this is something a newcomer should definitely not watch, I don’t have much else to say as the target audience knows perfectly well what to expect. It was a fun, very Monogatari-esque watch, and that’s all there is to it. [8/10] (x)

Recommend: HELL Yeah! | Yes | Eh??? | Nope | This anime killed my parents

[druid-for-hire]

#for what it's worth i think dolokhov is represented by that driving low string/percussion you hear in the duel and preparations#marya is represented by heavy waltz in accordion#sonya is piano ballad#and mary/old prince are some kind of chromaticism and tonal dissonance#balaga....well he;s just for fun#druid-for-hire#music theory#great comet#npatgco1812#dave malloy#GOD analyzing this stuff is so much fun#i really hope you dont mind me spewing a bunch of bullshit about chords and rhythms on your post lmao

i don’t mind at all!

you’re completely correct about that anatole/natasha stuff in The Ball; there’s a post about that somewhere. (x)

also about instrumentation symbolism: very much so! marya is almost confirmed accordion, and helene is... piano, in a different form that i don’t know enough about music theory to describe. but you hear it when she first meets natasha, saying “so beautiful, what a charming young girl,” utterly enchanting natasha, before marya so abruptly cuts in with her accordion ditty lol

(aaaand also charming starts out with some Groovy Piano too... and charming has some syncopation. mostly in the piano... and also the Groove just gets you in that syncopated mood even if its not outright in the instrumentation. hm hm hm)

balaga... he’s egg. shooka shooka

as for sonya’s piano ballad... i don’t know if it qualifies as one, but the beginning of sunday morning is both foreboding and also fairly sonya-ish to me and then gets cut by marya again, shouting TIME FOR CHURCH, and the piano dives way into the bass clef as marya commandeers the stage and also segues into the Ball tone also love how it goes back into Ball-Mode when natasha starts talking about anatole and... well, the ball

i also wonder if the piccolo ties into anything or is just a really cool instrument that dave likes? because boy it is having a grand fucking time near the end of sunday morning and in the opera, among others

back to instrumentation: i don’t think the 12/8 stuff is a stretch at all! i feel like weird rhythms like duplets/triplets to represent conflict is a really common thing; I know Next to Normal has had something like that in Superboy and the Invisible Girl, where i think there’s a 5/7 time sig????? also, his internal conflict doesn’t start to really really resolve until he’s chasing anatole around moscow so it very makes sense for his bit in the abduction to be his classic 12/8, and man is it nice to hear Great Comet of 1812 (finale) bend heavily on the Pierre melody/chord progression while sitting on a neat 4/4 time. no more of that angsty vitriol and spitting judgement. just pierre and his happy heart

(edit: also, having played Pierre before, you really have to be hammering on that keyboard, especially for the angry russian mood. shit is Loud. pierre was really a flaming mess)

hey:

the chord progression at the very end of The Duel and the beginning of Letters is The Same

[psi-psina]

have your feelings about tfp changed in the last couple of months? do you think it's possible anything will happen on easter? i really want something to happen by=ut i'm losing hope. i also wish they would just end the speculation if there's rlly nothng else. im tired of feeling led on

It’s possible something could happen on any day including easter, unfortunately, anything is possible which is why this is so annoying. I think it is very, very unlikely that anything will happen though. Like I know that nothing seems to add up and they appear to be spectacularly bullshitting and another episode is a very enviable solution but the fact is it’s far more likely that there is no such solution because this is real life and we know precisely jack shit about the motives and machinations that went into alla this. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

My feelings about tfp haven’t really changed no, I mean they’ve….evolved I guess in the sense that I swing between feeling deeply embittered and sad and annoyed about it to the occasional times when i can take it purely on it’s own terms seperate from all the bullshit and deceit that surrounded it and feel annoyingly sentimental about it. 😩 I can appreciate the audacity of it, I can appreciate the full extent of the horribleness of the message they wanted to convey, like they certainly made their point but I also think the way they went about it was cheap, nasty and, if they never “break the glass” so to speak, fucking cowardly. Which is still possible, but tbh just looks more and more unlikely. Like I frankly have no idea HOW they could even do it at this stage, let alone CONVINCINGLY for the majority audience who have such a completely different idea of what they’ve been watching all this time lmao. They now have a HELL of a lot more to explain than just the romance aspect like….what the fuck (assuming there is any intention whatsoever to actually explain anything which I can’t even be arsed hoping for anymore tbh). Like the time for them to address it in the story was NOW, it was this series. The stakes after series 3 were high enough for a reveal have a genuine impact but still be organic, and as everyone’s noticed, advancing the story without doing that inevitably changed the tone of the entire show again, but this time…..overall it really changed it for the worse. 😞 Like this is the first and only season of the show that doesn’t work as a cohesive whole at all, the episodes just feel completely disjointed. Tonally it’s a mess, structurally it’s a mess, and there is just so much totally self-aware meta-fictional self-indulgent nonsense in this season it’s starting to feel overbearing. It worked perfectly for tab because it was a one-off, which REVEALS ITSELF to be a dream. It did not work for s4. And like for fucks sake the key to any good slow burn is knowing WHEN to deliver the climax/resolution. That when was tfp. Or rather, what SHOULD NOT have been tfp. I know the importance they place in Sherlock’s character arc and clearly his journey to self-love was like, important to them but there are roughly ENDLESS ways they could have addressed that while actually resolving the fucking plot they built up for seven years and BREAKING THE FUCKING GLASS instead of trapping me inside some nasty deceitful repetitive mind palace self-parody episode FOREVER. Baiting (in this case quite nastily tbh) people for too long is just gonna make them lash out and leave. Or in my case, end up trapped in hell for all eternity.

….this turned into a rant. as you can see i am still NOT OKAY with any of this and probably…..never will be lmao.