#but acting in minor self interest? going out after work to draw or read? hanging out in my room and lighting candles and playing

[autistic-shaiapouf]

It is so SURREAL to be able to actually SEE that I'm doing better, to NOTICE that the moments of stability and peace are coming more frequently and staying for longer, really flexing on that autonomy I have and it is fantastic

[aesethewitch]

Hey friend 👋 I just stumbled across your ghost analysis post and was intrigued, and saw that you do tarot readings?

I recently began looking into tarot, but the two decks I have aren't traditional ones, but I've read from a lot of people that traditional tarot decks are the (only?) way to go. I'm curious about your journey in learn to interpret the deck(s) you have, since I'm also struggling with that.

I also see that you have a free tarot reading Friday, and since it IS Friday, I'd like to ask- how can I overcome the political and religious obstacles that force me to hide?

(if this is a question that isn't so suited for tarot, that's my bad)

-SC

Hey there! (:

So, anyone who tells you there's only One Right Way to do something is full of shit. Folks just like to feel superior for doing things More Correctly Than You.

You can use whatever for divination and get solid results. You could make a functioning system out of coupons. Hell, you could doodle on printer paper, cut it into squares, and then use it as a tarot deck. That would probably work, as long as you understood what the pictures meant.

Some folks have an easier time with traditional decks, others don't. I tend to vibe with decks that are a little funky. Extra cards, different suits, interesting presentations, etc.

The deck I use most often, the Alleyman's Tarot, is technically not a tarot deck at all -- it's an oracle deck, since it doesn't follow the "traditional" composition of a tarot deck (major arcana + minor arcana). But I still call it a tarot deck because I can and I use it like one. It works great.

I do have the Deviant Moon Tarot, which is based on the Rider-Waite-Smith, and it would be considered a "traditional" kind of deck. It's a great deck, and it's the one I taught myself to read with many years ago.

When I got that deck, I believed that someone else had to buy tarot decks for you; it was "selfish" and would "taint" the deck's power if you bought it yourself. Also bullshit, by the way, but I had that belief in me. A kind lady overheard me lamenting and pining for the Deviant Moon in a bookstore, bought me a gift card, and gave it to me with a note telling me to buy the deck for myself. It was a life-defining moment for me, to be sure, and one that sticks with me today. I strive to live up to that kindness.

Learning was an interesting thing. I didn't look up any spreads, and I barely used the book. Mostly, I just wanted to look like I knew what I was doing right out the gate (I didn't; I was 18 and had self-image issues, lmao). So I taught myself to interpret based on vibes and imagery, then went back to reference the book when I really needed to. It helped that I had a spirit ally hanging around that was looking for a vessel; it's still attached to those cards to this day, and it helped me learn how to hone my abilities. For a long time, the act of pretending I knew what I was talking about prevented me from actually learning much at all.

It isn't... well, it isn't great advice. I wouldn't recommend "learning" tarot the way I did. I figured it out after a while, but there was no real system to it. If I could go back and relearn it the way I would do it now, I absolutely would. Here's what I've learned is a fairly good method for learning any new tarot deck:

Shuffle the cards and lay the pile face-down.

Draw the top card.

In a notebook, write down your immediate, knee-jerk impressions of the card. I recommend just key words or single sentences.

Then, take a closer look at it. Note the colors, positioning of figures, background imagery, and other details. Write down what you see, not how you would interpret it.

Now interpret. Take your time writing down how the card's specific imagery makes you feel. What does it remind you of?

Jot down an example question and how you would apply the card to the answer. For example, the question "What do I need to know right now?" answered by Temperance could be something like: "Patience is a virtue. Take your time." Or however you would interpret that.

Set the card aside. Repeat until the entire deck is done.

Congrats! Now, you have a general idea of the entire deck's meanings and a handy guide to help you remember what they mean to you.

Bonus step: Review periodically. Opinions and interpretations change as you do.

I follow this routine with every new deck I get. I've figured out that the same card in two different decks could have vastly different meanings, depending on how it's depicted. It's really cool!

Also, it's kind of important to note that I'm not really a full animist. I don't think that tarot decks (or other tools) have individual spirits. My Deviant Moon deck has one, but that's because of the ally I mentioned before. The Alleyman's deck doesn't have a spirit as far as I can tell. I've got spirits hanging around that enjoy assisting with divination and magic and such, though.

As for free tarot, it's closed for now! The update reblog was sent to my drafts instead of posting,,, sorry about that!! Your question would definitely be fine for tarot interpretations (though a little shallow with only one card; situations like that are typically better interpreted with more cards I've found). I do open it up every Friday, though, so feel free to stick around and send another next week! (: (Or visit my Ko-Fi linked in my pinned post if you want a more in-depth paid reading! /shilling)

[rayofsunas]

otherworldly! s/o

A/n: happy monday! I woke up at 7am and since then I've been grinding out assignments/classes and now this, so I actually feel productive even though I've been staring at my computer for a while. but thank you for requesting anon! I enjoyed writing this and I hope you enjoy reading it! <33 also to understand this more, I'd like to point out that this connects to the speculation Genshin and Honkai are alternate universes of one another. so for example, Scaramouche is a harbinger from his time, but he may have been a warlord in a different, with a completely different name (keeping his appearance ofc) hope that makes sense. so if you've paid attention to what I've been saying about Scara and his mini-series, etc. you'll understand what I mean in Scara's lol. his reader insert is fem for the same reason as above btw!

Summary: otherworldly! s/o who arrived as a fallen meteor, that can bring back plants to life/heal deep wounds/scars and resurrect people.

Parings: Albedo/Gn! Reader, Xiao/Gn! Reader, Scaramouche/Fem! Reader

Warnings: swearing, fluff, alternate realities/time traveler au! (reader is not the traveler), death/resurrection

Word count: 1.7k

Albedo

you don't have a vision like some people in Teyvat, because you're not from there; you're from a whole different world itself. instead, you have healing abilities that allow you to any energy you absorb in the form of food/sunlight, and you can use that energy to heal others. though, the healing can only go as far as healing minor injuries such as shallow cuts, scratches, or smoothing out scars. the same can work if you were to heal yourself.

Albedo is so intrigued when he finds you passed out in the pit of a meteor, half of your body hanging out while the other is awkwardly still in it

one, because who is this stranger in a meteor for crying out loud

and two, he notices your wounds on your arms are healing by themselves, slowly though

as someone who studies alchemy, life forms, and such, he's very intrigued that you're able to heal yourself without medicine, and he wonders if you can do the same to others

so he takes you to his lab, and runs a few tests

yes, you're still passed out when this happens, but he's just so curious and couldn't hold back

don't worry though, he's just drawing some blood and testing to see what you can do, because who knows, you may not even speak his language and won't be able to communicate with him (doesn't make a difference Albedo, you need COnSENT-)

so, just for science, he cuts the palm of his hand a little and decides to see if you can heal him

it doesn't take him long to notice the way the tips of your fingers are glowing a light greenish-yellow, so he immediately assumes that's the source of your powers and places a finger on his palm

it takes a second before anything happens, but eventually his cut starts to slowly close

once again he's even more shocked and intrigued

you have the natural ability and he's never come across someone with so much raw strength being able to do that

so you're right up his alley

when you wake up you're confused as hell (obviously) but thankfully, you can speak his language and are able to share your story

Albedo decides to make a deal with you

he'll help you get home if you can educate him more about your ability and your homeland. you agree

it works out perfectly, because you both have something the other needs/can do for the other (you have your power that he's interested in, and he's found a way for you to return home)

it's also easy to work together because of those same common interests, and it helps that he studies alchemy cause he's way more knowledgeable about you and the process can go a tiny bit quicker for you if you wish to return home sooner

at first you're merely friends, co-workers if you wish

but then he starts falling for you and vice versa

you both genuinely enjoy each others company, so you decide to stay in Teyvat a little while longer, even after he finds a way for you to go home

I wouldn't put it past Albedo to want to return to your world if you allow it

he'd be interested in this new or not so new world ;)

Xiao

you're like the traveler in a sense, where as soon as you climbed out of the meteor, you felt this connection to Teyvat and your vision randomly appeared. you have a dendro vision, something you learned was a rarity within liyue and mondstadt. along with that vision, you had the previous ability to grow/heal plants. you can bring back dead plants, though if they've been dead for a very long time, that's beyond your ability. they also can't be brought back if they've been badly burned.

Xiao may not be interested at first about what vision you have or even where you came from + why the hell you climbed out of a meteor

he's more interested in getting you home so you can stop asking questions about his own abilities/vision and odd, unfamiliar, but beautiful world

but boy when he catches you bringing back a wilted Glaze Lily?!? shook

he secretly thinks you're so cool and it piques his interest

he's never seen anyone do this before, and though his eyes were deceiving him when he first saw the lily spring to life again

but then when he catches you healing more plants, on your way to Liyue to hopefully find Zhongli for answers, he's so interested

he doesn't ask a crapload of questions, BUT he's going to ask at least one or two

"how're you doing that?"

"what are you?

the questions are kind of vague and require more in-depth explanations than he'd originally hoped, but he's surprisingly willing to listen to your story on the way to the harbor

after he learns your story and calls for Zhongli, he'll immediately leave and claim he has no further interests in you

but he's obviously lying

he finds as he's sitting on top of one the smaller mountains one night, looking down at the glowing Liyue town, he has more questions

way more questions

surprising Zhongli, Xiao shows appears when he's showing you around and getting you accustomed to the people/culture

he finds himself hoving behind you, shyly almost, never asking questions (at least not in Zhongli's presence

his reason for standing behind you is to protect you from any harm, so that way, when he decides to ask you more questions, you'll be there for him to do so and not dead or lost

when you tell Zhongli you'd wish to stay in Teyvat, specifically Liyue, Xiao is happy ngl

he can ask you questions and now that you're somewhat used to Liyue, having been here for four months already and planning to stay forever, he can catch you alone and ask questions without Zhongli hovering or acting as your tour guide lol

slowly, and I mean sluggishly slow, he's going to ask you more questions and he may, emphasis on may, tell you his own story

Scaramouche

you're from an alternate reality of Teyvat, a former doctor in your world. basically, Teyvat hundreds of years in the future. you've studied the human body to become a doctor obviously and you used to be able to bring back the dead using your bare hands. it didn't matter how far back ago they've died, as long as their full-body was still intact (full skeleton needed). though, the further back they died, the more energy you'd use, and if you run out of energy too soon, you couldn't bring them back. but now in this strange land, you can't. in exchange for your powers being lost, you're given an electro vision.

Scaramouche is tasked with finding out more about these odd meteors that keep appearing in various corners of Teyvat

and one very large one

he doesn't care who you are, what you are, what your excuse for being in Teyvat is, but he's been ordered to explore the fallen meteor and since you happened to be passed out inside it upon further exploration, you're part of the mystery he's been told to check out

and, it doesn't further help your situation that you landed in Snezhnaya, in the weirdest, not-so-warm clothing AND he finds you attractive (yes, you heard it here folks), plus you're going to catch hypothermia out here dressed like that

it would suck for a pretty girl such as yourself to be frozen to death

so Scaramouche decides to take you to the Tsaritsa, who leaves you in Scaramouche's care since he found you

she says he can do whatever he wants you, dispose of you, etc.

when you finally come too in an odd room on a couch in front of a fireplace, you're confused, cold as hell despite the flames, and when you see his face, you're immediately angered, which he finds odd

it's almost as if you recognize him... but he doesn't recognize you so he's confused as well

"what're you doing here?"

bold of you, he thinks. to question him with that tone as if you have authority here, over him

"watch yourself. I was going to ask you the same."

you don't seem too pleased with him though

"we agreed to never speak again, or so I thought..."

"are you stupid or are you just playing the stupid card to be released?" he'd say

though as soon as you burst and yell at him about a situation he's not familiar with, he's starting to understand a bit more

you're not from here, not anywhere in Teyvat at least, and by the way you're talking to him as if you know him, he assumed correctly that you're from an alternate reality, where he's also present

though despite his correct assumption, he demands answers and you cannot be allowed any kind of freedom until he gets them

you tell him your story and how in your world, a version of himself exists and that you were briefly married, though split because he was too much of a control/power freak for you and your daughter

he disagrees with the last part about him being a control/power freak ofc but

he decides he'll keep you around, against your wishes

one, because you can become useful if your resurrection abilities are awoken; you'd be able to save many fallen Fatui soldiers, with more training so you don't run out of energy ofc

and two, he doesn't think his other self would miss you very much if you're both on bad terms, he sure would miss such a pretty face if you were to leave though, that's for sure...

so, he's going to keep you around, so he can help train/get used to your electro vision. it works best that way since he has the same vision and can train you more efficiently (I think Scara has electro powers, just an assumption!)

he will also hopefully be able to awaken your resurrection abilities and if you can't, well then sorry you're disposable

overtime, all the Harbingers tease him about his little crush and he either denies it or strongly provokes it cause his ego is through his fucking hat

exhibit a. literally doesn't care that he's caught by childe staring at you train and will say something like, "and? you're just jealous she's not interested in you like she is me."

exhibit b. will throw a fit if someone accuses him and says he has, "no room for crushes or love." even if he was somewhat capable of it in your world...

3.22.21, rayofsunas

[wolfhowlingdragonflyingsirensong]

spoilers

Since I recently played Life is Strange, which whoah, is totally an experience that I recommend to everyone, I’ve come to appreciate how well the game handles choices. It’s interesting how choices can seem meaningless good acts, like helping Alyssa avoid being hit, translates to her trusting Max enough for Max to save her. But, the game also points out how we can’t control consequences, since good deeds are done with nothing but good intentions can have fatal consequences, such as warning Victoria (and her believing you) leads to her murder, or the biggest good deed of them all, saving Chloe, leads to a storm that (can) kill lots of people. And ultimately, what’s cool is that every choice is canon, since Max it’s not a blank slate, meaning every choice the player makes is something Max considered. What do I mean with Max not being a blank slate? I mean regardless of your choices, Max likes waffles AND bacon and eggs. This is a minor example, but it serves for many things. Max can comfort Victoria or not, and later when they talk at the party regardless of your choice, Max at first is pretty angry, so she’s completely capable of standing up for herself and others. Max loves Chloe regardless of the player's feelings towards her. Max can be pretty uncaring or a literal angel, by Kate. And all of this is canon because even nice people contemplate not being nice all the time, even if it’s only a thought. This brings me to the ships topics. First of all, I’m glad that this game has non-ambiguous, non-sexualized, soft wlw romance (actually two counting BTS!) without the canon protagonist being turned evil or something, and I think that’s incredibly important. If the game had only Chloe as a love interest, I would totally get it and have no problem,  because the game is pretty much focused on their bond. Not that it matters to those who do, I personally don't ship it because I self-project (and I totally recognize it) on friendships I had in my youth that were a bit like Chloe and Max's friendship in the first episodes, and they were toxic. Don't get me wrong, I loved my friends and they were (are) good people. I like Chloe a lot, and there's no denying that there are strong feelings on Max's part for Chloe that are romantic, and it's up to the player to determine if Max is going to pursue Chloe. Denying it means that is both not reading Max's diary and erasing her sexuality. I write this because I don't want to seem like I don't ship them because I like Grahamfield, it's not that, I could very well be into both, and I think Chloe develops so much at the end of episode 5 that, while before I thought she was only in love with Rachel, at that point is totally understandable for me. If you ship Pricefield then that's awesome! You have all the canon content to back you up and a beautiful story of love with the childhood friends-to-lovers trope, can't get much better. Plus, the whole game is about their bond. It's incredibly well developed at the end mostly when you see Chloe growing out of her initial angry phase, and maturing in a beautiful way. So, shipping Grahamfield in this fandom sometimes feels like hey, you are a giant dick. I don't like hate on any ship or character (especially dunking on Chloe, because she's a representation of how trauma is not nice while actually being cool and kind, as well as being one of the few wlw canon protagonists), because both choices are completely canon, it's entirely up to the player. Again, if Chloe was the only canon love interest then that would be totally cool. Buuuut Max can choose to go on a date with Warren, write on his slate that he is cute, raise his grade (which can be done as a friendship thing only), help him in his experiment, kiss him, and if she does, she writes in his diary "I wanted one kiss from a boy I cared about", that to me, reads as having a canon interest in him too. And since Max is bisexual from what I understand, erasing that part doesn't sit well with me. Both Chloe and Warren have flaws, which hey is what happens with characters. Can you imagine having perfect characters? That would be so boring. He is a realistic 16-year-old boy to Max's 18 and Chloe's 19 years. He is extremely awkward, dorky, a little cringy, a boy with a harmless boy with a crush and that's normal at that age. He's helpful almost to a fault, and while some argue that's because he feels entitled, let me tell you, no niceGuy I've ever met has been so helpful if you don't give in, they don't back out after someone lets them down nicely, and he states his interest in Max clearly, and niceGuys don't tend to do that because they like to pine away and be angry that a girl didn't read his mind and magically fell in love with him. He believes Max from the get-go and helps her all the time, regardless of his feelings, which is like, basic decency, so if you want to call him a piece of shit I think that's going a little too far. If you want to take the words of others, Kate says he's a smart and silly cutie-pie with a good heart, suggests they take him with them to their tea-shop tour of Portland after everything and supports their date (besides them being friends, he brings her homework and is shown worried about her). I don't remember that part well, but I think Alyssa and Dana also support Grahamfield (and Brooke is very jealous!) so I think if he was an asshole they wouldn't be so supportive and Brooke wouldn't be into him, or Stella in another reality. My only point is that hey if you don't like him that's fine, but to call him a pervert or entitled or assholery is kinda uncalled for, to be honest, and using the nightmare sequence, in which EVERYONE is out of character (except Jeffershit) and shown being assholes, as a canon that he is bad seems to me like going out of your way. It's a nightmare for a reason, do you really think Kate would have said those things to Max if you save her? She's incredibly grateful. Or do you think Chloe would have done those things??? She would NEVER. Then why is Warren being treated as someone who would do those things for a nightmare? I don't get it. There are two myths regarding him: that he spies on Max and that he photoshopped a photo with them. First one, you can verify with mods that he can't see SHIT, he is merely waiting for her outside. Second, the photo is developed, not photoshopped, Max doesn't say hey we never took that photo, she merely is surprised he kept it. Now, he's a bit pushy when it comes to the drive-in (he acknowledges he's a pain in the booty), says like a stupid joke (a 16-year-old making stupid jokes, what a crime), and has that photo, which for some is crossing boundaries, and hey, that's fine. I, personally, just think a 16-year-old having a photo with his friend and crush is not creepy or bad. So, now that I'm over the ship discourse, which I hate but had to write to explain, I'm so glad this game brought so many interesting characters. My only complaint is that it felt a little too short when it came to other characters, I guess it's because the literal theme of the game is about abandoning youth and growing up as well, so that's because it's very focused on Chloe and Max's relationship, besides the romance. I adore Kate! I’m so happy we were able to save her, it was seriously one of the best moments I’ve ever seen in a game, I would have liked to see her future children’s book with Max’s photos, their tea sessions, and her coming back to school. I would love to have seen more of Stella, (a POC I think) that according to her words, faced an abusive home and poverty to end up studying in a prestigious school like Blackwell, busting her ass to work and yet being super cool and kind! I would have loved to see more of Daniel, how he faced bullying, how his home life is, his budding romance with Brooke, his future drawings. I would have loved to see more of Dana! How she dealt with abortion, a heavy topic, and yet she's super happy, nice, and in a loving relationship apparently. I would have liked to see more of Juliet's reporting skills, I feel like she could have been more important to the plot, or at least more exposés on bullying and the Prescotts. I would have loved to see more of Alyssa, what she likes, her relationships, etc. I would have loved to see more of Taylor! How her mom was doing, what steps was she going to take in not falling with the Vortex Club bullshit, her love for fashion, like Courtney. We didn't get to know Courtney at all I feel and I would have liked to! I would have liked to see more of Victoria, her insecurities, her relationship with her parents, her inner thoughts (she's totally bi too I bet), even her friendship with Nathan seemed deeper. I would have liked to see more of cool hipster Evan, or good skater boy Luke. In short, I would have LOVED to have them all hanging more with Max. The ending, oh man, what an ending. It's incredibly hard, and I hate that saving Arcadia Bay seems to go into "bury your gays" trope, because if there was a way to save them both I would. The writing is very powerful, ending the way it began. This leads me to my initial topic, choices. I love that the game gives us choices, and considering there are other alternative realities, maybe both choices are canon in different universes. If I was in Chloe's shoes I couldn't choose to sacrifice my mom, and Joyce dies if Chloe is saved, as well as many other innocents, so I can't choose that ending, I just can't (and I understand that's totally personal for everyone). A really tough choice, at least for me, and hey, if it wasn't specified that practically everyone died, I would have saved Chloe no questions asked. I do love, however, how Chloe matures so much in the course of 5 days and her bond with Max. She sacrifices for Arcadia Bay, and a lot of it is because of Max, because she doesn't want her to make that choice. So now if you excuse me, I'm still playing the funeral scene in my mind and the bathroom scene (totally broken) and had to write this as cathartic, so feel free to disagree with me or whatever you prefer, each one of us experiences a different game because of our different experiences in life. Next step: BTS and LIS2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9uy4V8SvPk

[illfoandillfie]

Can I get a general career reading? With the art nouveau deck and the archetype oracle please.

of course darl! 

tarot: ace of cups, page of cups, justice, queen of cups,3 of swords, the fool, the tower, the hanged man, the world

okay!! we have some interesting cards here! something that drew my attention immediately was the first and last cards. we open with an ace which is the start of the minor arcana and all of the aces are related to new starts or new opportunities. And then we end on the world which is the last card of the major arcana and symbolises completion and fulfilment. so this seems to be a self-contained cycle you’re entering. 

I’d also like to just acknowledge how many cups cards there are here. The cups as a suit is related to emotions and the heart so this may be a highly emotional time or you may find yourself being driven by your emotions rather than logic or reason. There’s also a lot of major arcana cards which isn’t necessarily good or bad but it’s worth noting because the major arcana are generally related to Big life events or milestones whereas the minor arcana are more sort of every day things. so this seems like it’ll be a significant period for you. but lets have a closer look at it all. 

So like i said, the aces are related to new opportunities and the suit of cups is tied to emotions and the heart. So the ace of cups is related to new things or new situations that are cause for strong emotions. A lot of the time it’s connected to romance but in this career reading it’s probably more likely some sort of new opportunity, particularly related to creativity. There’s a lot of potential here, all you have to do is reach out and take the cup. But it’s not all happiness. The ace is being clarified by the three of swords which is a card of heartbreak and suffering, It can be through delays or absences, unrest or confusion. Any sort of disruption or incompatibility. This could indicate something going wrong at work. A worst case scenario could be being fired/retrenched but it could also be related to people you work with or just a tough work environment that you struggle with. Something here isn’t looking good though. The ace of cups can relate to intuition or spirituality as well so it might be that you’ve had a gut feeling something is coming or you might have noticed changes happening around the work place and if that’s the case I would definitely listen to your gut and prepare yourself for bad news. But there is definitely a silver lining here. The 3 of swords isnt the main card, the ace of cups is and that says to me that while something will go wrong it will open you up to finding something new which is a better fit for you. It might even be that the bad thing happens to someone else and consequently you take over their roll or something like that. But if you’ve been thinking about starting up some sort of creative endeavour, like an etsy store or writing a novel, this is the time to push forward with it. 

Then we have the page of cups and the fool. There are two court cards who appear in this reading so one may be someone you’ll associate or work with but it’s entirely possible that both of them represent you. The page is imaginative and sensitive. He’s a bit of a dreamer and often has his head in the clouds. This definitely fits in if you’ve been considering a new side hustle or if you’ve been thinking about making a change in your career path. the fool as a similar sort of energy but he’s less dreamy and more of a free spirit. he isnt worried about where he’s putting his feet, far more concerned with what he’s experiencing in each moment. He’s innocent, sometimes naive, but also courageous and more concerned with having fun. In relation to career and finances he’s definitely a symbol to take the leap - whether it’s selling art or putting your hand up for a promotion or leaving a job and finding a new one. The fool says go for it, especially if it’s something you’ve been dreaming about doing. There’s a very fresh and energized feeling in these cards and it seems you’ll soon be presented with an opportunity to follow through with your dreams. 

next is three major arcana. Justice is about doing things in the right way without cutting corners. The fool might be impulsive but justice is reminding you to do things right the first time so you don’t make a huge mistake that ruins all your plans. The tower is interesting in this position. I won’t sugar coat it, usually the tower is about a drastic, dramatic change. The kind of thing that shatters your world, sends everything crashing down around you. Together with Justice it could be a sign that some sort of truth is going to come out that turns things upside down for you. If you’ve been stealing office supplies or embezzling money (hopefully not) it is going to come out. On the flip side it could be about someone else’s lies being found out. If you’ve been involved with any workplace disputes recently the justice card is a sign that things will go in your favour as long as you’ve been honest and fair. And this could relate to that big change that’s going to open the new opportunity of the ace of cups. 

But I don’t feel like that’s exactly it. If the tower had shown up next to the 3 of swords i would say yeah that’s it. But with it being sandwich between justice and the hanged man  i feel like it’s something else. So let’s look at that hanged man. It’s a card related to sacrifice, release, and changing perspective. In relation to career it could symbolise feeling stuck or uncertain about where you’re headed. So together these three cards could be advice for you or a warning of sorts. They’re saying that the big change and taking that leap of faith the fool asks you to take, won’t be easy. There will be times when you feel like you made a mistake, like you’re in over your head and you’ve gotten yourself into a tower situation that is so much worse than whatever the 3 of swords you left behind was. You will think about throwing in the towel. you will think about giving up. But don’t listen to those voices. Justice is on your side and the scales will rebalance for you. It might take some readjustments, it might take rebuilding parts of your plan, it might take a fresh perspective. But you will be vindicated in your choice to try something new and things will clear up.  

Finally we have the queen of cups and the world. The queen of cups is a bit of an upgrade to the page from earlier. Of course, the queen may be someone you’ll turn to for advice or help. But I think she could also be you, closer to reaching your goal and the end of the cycle. The queen of cups is compassionate. She is calm and comforting. She symbolises devotion, pleasure, success. Where the page dreams and imagines, the queen creates and acts. She’s also a reminder that whatever you do as a job should help you feel emotionally fulfilled and not just financially. Especially since she’s being clarified by the world which is related to fulfilment as well as harmony and completion. The world comes at the end of a journey. It represents assured success and is associated with getting that job you want as well as graduations and celebrations. It’s a sign that if you take this opportunity that will present itself soon you can turn it into something you love and which can offer finance stability. The World is also about the start of a new cycle though. As one thing draws to an end, or one goal is reached, you see there is still further to climb and more to accomplish. 

I drew you 4 of the archetype cards as well as a few numerology and elemental cards. 

So the archetypes first. Thanks for requesting this deck by the way! I don’t often use it so it was nice to bring it out again! The thought behind these cards is that everyone’s personalities and psyche is made up of a number of different archetypes, some more evident than others. And these archetypes may change as you grow and also depending on the situation you’re in - you might act one way at work and another with your friends. I think traditionally these cards would be used to describe people but I’m hoping they can give us some insight on traits you can use in relation to your career as well as general sort of knowledge about the situation presented in the tarot cards. Each archetype as a light side and a shadow side which reflect both positive and negative aspects. 

The first archetype is the Alchemist. Light - transformation of base motives and goals into golden wisdom. Shadow: Misuse of power and knowledge that come through spiritual practice. - to me this really fits with the tarot cards. The main message of the tarot was to seriously consider whatever dreams or fantasies you’ve been thinking about in relation to your career to to go after them and i think thats what the light attribute is really getting at here. You have the power within yourself to turn you little goal into something big and beautiful. 

Prince. light - romantic charm and potential for power. shadow - using power for self-aggrandizement. This is interesting considering the number of cups cards we had and how often they’re linked to romances. The prince may be someone you come across, maybe someone involved in whatever the 3 of swords situation is. However, the prince is also seen as a ruler in training and if you’re appearing as the page of cups to start and gradually becoming the queen, then it’s also quite possibly related to your journey. 

Trickster. light - transcending convention, stuffiness, and predictable behaviour. shadow - manipulating others through duplicity. This card could be linked with the fool perhaps, unpredictable and kind of wild. It also reminds me a bit of that justice card, especially if you’re taking it from an angle of “someone did something wrong and they’re being caught out”.  

Child: Magical. So, according to the guidebook there are 4 archetypes that everyone will have one of but each of them have multiple versions. The child is one of those and here we’ve drawn the magical version. light - seeing the potential for sacred beauty in all things. The belief that everything is possible. shadow - pessimism, depression, and disbelief in miracles. believing that energy and action are not required for growth. this definitely feels like its related to the ace of cups and the 3 of swords, believing that something wonderful can come from something painful. It may also relate to the page who spends his time dreaming rather than acting, like the shadow attriubte. 

From the numerology deck we got personal growth, effort, and pride. personal growth indicates a time of significant growth and improvement and that is absolutely reflected in the tarot cards above. theres a lot of potential here and a lof of cards that suggest this will be a turning point for you. Effort is a sign that things coming will require some hard work from you, extra effort to overcome obsticles and challenges. but when the going gets tough the tough get going and you are definitely tough enough to handle it. And Pride to me represents that you will be proud of what you can accomplish through this hard work. 

Finally, the element cards: magnetism (attraction) and rock (endurance). there are magnetic forces that are pulling you towards this change and this opportunity. this could tie in with the intuitive message of the ace of cups, if you’ve been able to sense things shifting. rock is another card that points to things being difficult at times and it’s saying you have what it takes to get through them and to find success and happiness. 

[sigritandtheelves]

You told me you don't believe in canon, can I ask why? I am really curious, and I don't mind a long detailed answer ( lol). Also what are your thoughts on the difference between canon divergent and AU?

Crisis on Infinite Truths, or, Why I Don’t Believe in Canon (And Neither Should You)

Thanks for this ask, friend. I’ve thought about this quite a bit, especially when I see occasional comments about what or when events “really” happened, or people saying that they don’t like AU (by which they often mean any canon divergence). So here’s my little manifesto on why I think adherence to canon is pointless (and painful).

The world of the X-Files contradicts itself. Constantly.

Mulder and Scully met in March, 1992 (Pilot). But in December, 1993, they’d known each other only a few months. Scully was missing for four weeks. No wait, Duane Barry clearly takes place in August, and she was returned in November so that’s three months!  Samantha’s middle name is Teena—no, Anne! Margaret Scully gave Dana her cross necklace for her birthday… or was it for Christmas?

Anyone who’s ever tried to piece together a coherent timeline for this show knows that there are constant, frustrating contradictions, and numerous impossibilities—but not the good kind that Mulder likes to investigate. We pick and choose these minor points to accept or deny all the time without worrying about betraying canon. Why, then, do some remain committed to the idea of a “true” storyline (canon), even after major contradictions in story, not to mention the betrayals and cruelties of our Clueless Creator? It’s a matter of personal preference and one’s own relationship to the show, but here’s why I don’t believe in canon.

The smaller discrepancies listed above (just a tiny sampling) appear early in what I think of as the main timeline of seasons 1-7, but the contradictions that began to appear afterward were truly egregious: major changes in the mythology and characterization that were incompatible with earlier seasons, and which were sometimes later retconned by the show itself (Supersoldiers? Never happened. Colonization in 2012, “The date is set!”? Nup.). The plot became desperate (for ratings and to intensify its drama), cruel (to both Mulder and Scully in its violences and unjustified, poorly handled traumas), dictated by real-world constraints (Duchovny’s absence), and utterly nonsensical (the Smoking Man appears to be an otherworldly demon? He dies how many times?). I mostly hang with canon in the first seven seasons, but after that, I feel absolutely no obligation to this nonsense. Season ten was so painful and so offensive in so many ways—I won’t ever go near most of that season. I don’t think any fan should feel obligated to believe in one “true” timeline, especially when it seems written into the show that there are multiple possibilities and versions of truth.

My orientation toward canon, and I think that of many fanfic writers, is based on this multiplicity: we pick narrative elements that are grounded in what’s given or represented in the show itself. We reframe and retell. We offer something new. I’m going to draw, just briefly, on the work that I do academically, and talk about hermeneutics. Writing fanfiction is a transformative act of interpretation. By necessity, all of it is canon-divergent to some extent, because canon (like any primary text) contains no “true” interpretation. There is no single and correct reading, no singular meaning beyond what we, as readers and viewers, bring to it. A text is worth what we make of it and nothing more. Isn’t that incredibly liberating?

Why are some people so committed to the idea of canon?

When I first returned to writing fanfic, I had an epic goal in mind—I wanted to trace the relationship development between Mulder and Scully through all of the years of the show. I failed very early on because the project quickly felt both impossible and unnecessary. Most fic that is “canon compliant” emphasizes a particular piece of the timeline in order to parse out the distinct emotional and psychological nuances of a single arc. We zero in on one place to make sense of it (hermeneutics) and then tell our stories that offer more than the original. Already, we diverge from canon.

Rather than an account of the whole series, my idea became an effort to understand and reframe the reproduction arc, beginning in season five. It became the “Bearings” series of four stories, which attempted to be faithful to canonical events as much as possible. But even then, it diverged after the beginning of season eight because the things that happen in that season do not make sense in the arc of the rest of the show. I could find absolutely no justification for Mulder’s “death” based on what we know of the alien plot. Supersoldiers? They get written out of the show after season nine! They don’t make sense in relation to anything else we know about the aliens, and they never appear again. Screw supersoldiers, and screw the nonsensical mytharc of seasons eight and nine. I rewrote it in the final part.

People focus on the canonical because they want there to be coherence and consistency—they want a true truth that is grounded in the show’s representation. I say: let go of that. It is impossible both because the writing contradicts itself, literally, over and over again, and because many of the events that do become consistent (Scully gave up William? Really, we’re sticking with that one because no one in Hollywood knows how to write children?) are so fundamentally wrong in relation to what we know of the characters.

There is no dogma, there is no truth, there is no single and correct canon. We have pieces. Let’s make beautiful things with them.

Through all of a narrative’s divergent possibilities, we choose our elements.

We know that the arc of this overall story was not planned. There’s no show bible, no “truth” that was ever out there, in the end. What we have instead are truths (plural) and infinite possibilities: factoids, events, feelings, characters. Personally, I have a few things that I hold as true across most versions of the stories that I like to tell, and some of that borrows from post-season-seven events, even as I tend to rewrite canon after that point: Mulder and Scully tried IVF, but it didn’t work. Afterward, they had two children together (at a reasonable human age for conceiving children). They find their way (in all ‘verses) to the unremarkable house. They keep fighting the good fight and are as tough as nails—but they always love the absolute hell out of each other and their kids. These are the elements that I often choose to keep, and the rest I can play around with. Others do great things with other bits and pieces, and I like to experiment with angsty vignettes, too. I dig a good break-up fic, for example. Even an on-the-run fic: I love those, too. There are interesting, nuanced, painful, and beautiful things that can be done with what 1013 gave us—but not with everything it gave us and nothing else.

What’s the difference between AU and Canon Divergence?

This is a difference that gets conflated all the time, and I’m just as guilty of this mix-up as anyone else, because of the way the term AU gets used these days. It’s not a huge deal; I’m not really into taxonomizing and hair-splitting. But I do think story metadata is useful for finding what you’re looking for, so maybe we should clarify what these things mean. AU stands for Alternate Universe, and initially, that’s what this term was used to designate: a fundamental difference in worlds. Let’s put Mulder and Scully in the Wild West, or the 1950s, or in space, and see how their story changes or stays the same. I love these stories, as many do, because they maintain essential elements from the world of the show (characterization, certain plot points, family relations, approximations of life-defining events), but allow readers and writers to speculate about how things might have played out, were the world not as it is.

Canon divergence is different, and also is pretty self explanatory. This is the world of the X-Files, but here’s how things would play out if just this one thing (or these five) happened differently: Melissa didn’t die in Paper Clip; Scully and Mulder kept and raised William; Mulder finds Samantha alive at the end of Closure; etc. These stories are great because they allow for imaginative speculation, but keep us in a world we’re familiar with. But again, all fanfiction involves creative speculation. All of it diverges from what we actually saw. These just diverge a little more widely. They speculate a little bit harder, maybe.

The difference between canon divergence and AU gets fuzzy in spaces like pre-XF, because it’s kind of an AU—a world that takes place before the timeline of the show, and therefore makes major changes before there’s such thing as “canon” (see—we using scare quotes now). It seems like hair-splitting to argue for one or the other, but AU probably makes the most sense, unless you’re going to incorporate major elements of the canonical storyline too.

So that’s pretty much all I have to say. Sorry for the long-windedness, but I’d love to chat more about it.

[chariflare]

end of work week so No Brain Energy for a “full post” so here’s just like. a brain dump of stuff i liked and disliked about 7 deadly sins (s1). pretty spoiler-y

dislikes (so that we end the post on the most tasty part of the meal)

they give melio.das a flaw of “repeated sexual offender” with the same level of gravitas and plot-irrelevance that ya authors make their self-insert protagonists “clumsy” (i.e. it’s written as a “flaw” but doesn’t affect the plot and is often used for ““comedic effect””). unlike clumsiness though, repeatedly groping women should get a person arrested. thanks

elizabeth is still a damsel

jericho. not the feminist take that the author thinks she is. awful

ultimately the cool female villains turn out to be not that strong or important, and also get love interest’d with members of the main heroic cast (& both’s motives depend on a man)

depending on how her character arc ends up diane’s obsession with wishing she wasn’t a giant is kinda uncomfortable

i don’t mind that elaine looks young-ish but i find it uncomfortable that she has an anime kid voice to top it all off (in jp...?)

gil.thunder’s side-switch wasn’t appropriately established and his og character sucks. years of acting as a moustache-twirling bishie villain don’t appear to have affected his psyche in a meaningful way, and it’s impossible to come away knowing what he’s supposed to act like now

final villains of the first arc are BORING (i think they get more characterisation after they come back to life lmao)

usual shonen bullshit that is both a draw to the show and also makes threat levels kind of ridiculous and non-existent after a certain point (getting bogged down in endless fights, people coming back to life, refusal to acknowledge that maybe their society’s awful power structures are the problem, rapidly changing definition of “the most powerful villain EVER”, etc.)... all encompassed in one pig death fakeout

the weird fatphobic king thing

tiddy outfits. (though i don’t mind didane’s actually?)

more generalised misogyny

the most important hetero ships this season are mediocre

if you know king arthur shit you will know that everyone’s loosely based off of characters from arthurian myth. if you don’t know you will be so pissed when king arthur the 16yo sports anime character shows up to be like “YOUR NEXT ARC IS HERE”

holy SHIT the second opening song is so bad. it’s so bad y’all (the the first op for comparison)

likes

all the characters are adult colleagues (above everything else) and they act like it. (they’re... kind of found family nakama but there’s a bit more there.) they’re all unique, respected, practiced masters of their craft from the beginning of the story

gula & jericho for the when they were threatening were REALLY cool. i am so psyched at the thought of a random minor young female villain who is so badass & dedicated to the evil cause she’s willing to enter a near-death state to chase some random losers into hell. gula’s outfit slaps

(cw: suicide) ban is a really neat character. he’s like... an interpretation of a “vampire curse”. he was never really happy before he achieved immortality (seeking it only because ”if you live long enough, something good might happen to you eventually, i guess”), and getting it (by accident) only made him Worse - more self-destructive and more isolated from the people around him. he often can’t bring himself to care about much of anything, other people don’t care about him, and ultimately his existence is so fucked up and he’s laden with so much guilt that he doesn’t care about himself either. but he’s also a fun guy! incredibly powerful! will help you beat up your abusive dad! probably bi! also he has his tits out at all times and who am i to say no 2 that

personality: part of the reason that he’s isolated from other people (and othered) is his social class... but a main part of it is how his childhood kind of, created his personality. he doesn’t really connect to social norms (or laws), has niche interests, and has a “weird”, disconnected personality (again, made way worse by living 100 years past his lifetime). that being said, he’s not emotionally unintelligent, has interests outside of fighting, and is ultimately a good person

(maybe don’t read this one if you’re interested in watching? it’s all spoilers) Depression: ban willingly runs head-first into danger not just bc it’s a valid fighting technique for someone who can’t die but bc he’s... too ready to give up. but this reveal is only interesting bc it comes after like. a period of getting along with the group, being friends and having fun. ultimately hanging out with them hasn’t solved his problems - it’s just made him able to put them aside for a little while... until his trauma gets brought up, at which point he’s willing to take the first hint of an easy exit, despite how unlikely it is that it’d achieve his supposed goal, if it just lets him relieve himself of his guilt and existential suffering by letting him believe for just one second that he can fix all of the things that he “broke” with his own death (note: killing melio.das would have broken his heart and probably have been suicide by proxy). (this causes a lot of trouble and is not framed as positive, but it’s also not framed as all his fault. and he has to deal with the consequences of this? he realises in retrospect that it was an incredibly unsound idea? and lEAVES THE GROUP BC HE REALISES HE HAS TO TAKE A BREAK???)

comparing ban to a traditional vampire arc: unlike with vampires (who are often an allegory for a group of people, e.g. rich people or oppressed groups) there’s only one ban. and therefore instead of having a group with the same trauma he just suffers alone

meaningful conflict between the main characters. i don’t think i’ve ever really gotten this in a shonen show? there’s a LOT of unresolved trauma. the characters still work together bc they’re Adults... but it’s simmering

ban <-> meli: meli is the only person besides elaine who ever really understood ban... but that doesn’t mean that ban’s ok, now (in fact, the resentment about only being understood by one person kind of makes him... worse). (e: meli also has connections to the rare fantasy creature which started ban’s life hell). ban has too much damage to the point that he becomes a liability

ban <-> king: resolved early, but still good. king is convinced that ban is the cause of all of his suffering partly bc he’s too jealous to admit that smo else got close to his sister when he couldn’t; ban has enough guilt that he just Takes It. even afterwards their personalities are kind of incompatible so it’s fun to see them hang out

meli <-> (king <-> diane): relationship drama but it’s not a frustrating bc it’s relevant to each character’s flaws and Baggage (and the plot doesn’t bother to pretend that diane will end up with melio). king has a lot of guilt over accidentally (?) ghosting his family and SOME of it’s valid (but not all). king is jealous of meli for being the target of diane’s affection but also kind of lowkey thinks he doesn’t deserve her bc of the pain he’s caused her

meli <-> elizabeth <-> diane: diane KNOWS she’s not going to be in a relationship with meli but she still desperately holds onto hope. diane’s fears about being unlovable feed into her lack of self esteem as an oppressed (or at minimum, villanized) minority

elizabeth (the princess) is firmly a member of the team and her determination and character improvement is taken seriously. she DOES get badass moments BEFORE she’s revealed to be a reincarnated angel child or whatever

diane (the only female member of the 7 sins who has a big role this season) is consistently taken seriously (by the writers & other characters)

elizabeth & diane get to INTERACT!! and BE FRIENDS!!

i love elaine. first show i’ve seen that (unintentionally? & through fantasy tropes??) nails Older Sister Disease, i.e. the oldest female sibling being left to deal with all the family business, emotional and physical baggage, while all the male/younger siblings just fuck off. caring for your family members but also lowkey resenting them. they don’t invalidate her feelings even after relieving king of a little of the responsibility for her suffering. (i liked the romance prequel manga a lot - i p much only picked up the anime bc i bought into the romance b/w her and ban)

(despite everything) meli.odas acts like a proper leader for his squad. he takes his responsibilities seriously and treats his colleagues as his equals

ngl the twist with gowther disguising himself and his protagonist hair as a disposable marked-for-death npc was really funny

aesthetic is unique and distinct from the overdone isekai dnd fantasy that’s popular atm

the first ed song by flow & granr.odeo cheers me up every time

the feeling of going on an adventure with your buddies. it’s fun!

[stellar-sushi-blog]

too much asagao!kit

have you ever wanted five pages of useless information about my si? no? oh well here you go anyways!! the link to the original template is here. be warned, it’s like ten pages long.

Name: Victoria

Nickname: Kit

Origin of nickname: She used ‘Kit’ as a pen name when she wrote for the school newspaper. Her friends soon started using it jokingly, but it ended up sticking with her.

Age: 17

Sex: Female

Sexual Orientation: Panromantic Heterosexual

Current status: a..alive?

Birth date: November 17th

Current residence: Asagao Academy

Occupation: Student

Hobbies: Kit enjoys writing, doodling, making origami, going for walks, sewing plushies, working with ceramics, and doing volunteer work.

-

Most important childhood “event” that still affects her: Kit almost always had her parents holding her hand. She even went to the same private school for 5th-8th grade where her mother worked. Also, before attending Asagao, she’d never spent more than two days away from one of her parents.

How? Because of the constant sheltering and guidance her parents gave her, Kit never learned how to do anything by herself and has a horrible time socializing and trying new things.

-

How does she dress or what do they typically wear? For school, she wears the required white button-up, yellow vest, and black skirt. On her free days she normally chooses to wear a white tank top, black skinny jeans, and an oversized, crocheted cardigan.

Other outfits one might find in their wardrobe: Kit has WAY too many tank tops and gym shorts. Where do they keep coming from? Where does she get them all?? Why does she have them all??? Please stop her.

Jewelry:Her favorite pieces of jewelry are her hoops earrings, a silver and black onyx ring, and a bracelet with an octopus charm on it.

Health: In a physical sense, she’s alright despite having a heart problem. Her mental state isn’t the greatest, though.

-

Habits/Obsessions: She loves Nokemon and candles. Even if she can’t burn them in her dorm room, she has like 20 candles.

Unique phrases/words: To her friends, she will blurt out random Italian phrases and curses to confuse them.

Do they curse, and if so, to what extent? Kit swears a moderate amount around friends, but only around friends.

-

Describe their sleep patterns: She either sleeps for 13 hours straight, or sleeps for 5 hours.

Describe their bedroom: Kit’s side of the dorm is very messy, but it’s very well organized.

Describe their daily rituals:

Kit is normally awoken by a distressed Sammi twenty minutes before class. In a panic, she throws on her uniform, brushes her hair and teeth, then grabs her backpack before leaving.

In class, she can normally be found doodling and trying not to fall asleep.

When lunch rolls around and she has no other work to finish up, Kit goes to the library and reads until the next bell. Here, she also finds time to gawk at the cute, student council president and even the boy who is almost always in the nurse’s office.

After the second half of the day, she returns to the dorm to do homework. Once it’s finished, she eats dinner then either works on a creative project or plays games with her roommate.

Lastly, she makes her way to the bathroom for a shower before finally going to bed.

-

How self-confident is the character? Not at all.

How does she see herself? As just another angsty teen who complains too much.

How do they believe she is perceived by others? She either thinks of herself as a queen, or a piece of crap. Depends on the day.

What does the character like least about themselves? Her constant need for attention.

How do they express themselves? By writing or drawing, normally.

Is this character generally dominant or submissive? Submissive

Most at ease when: She’s alone and safe, or just around friends in general.

Ill at ease when: She’s by herself in an unfamiliar area.

Describe their sense of humor: Kit will laugh at and joke about mostly everything, as long as it’s within some boundaries. She can go from laughing over a 12 year old’s joke to a joke about cannibalism.

If they could be described with one of the seven virtues, which would it be? Justice

If they could be described with one of the seven sins, which would it be? Envy/Sloth

Biggest Vulnerability (non physical): She’s easily threatened to do things.

Optimist or Pessimist: Pessimist.

Introvert or extrovert: Introvert.

Greatest Fear: BEARS

Other Fears/Insecurities/Phobias: Kit isn’t confident with her body/personality, is afraid of deep water, and fears fires.

Character's darkest, deepest secret: Her past.

Minor Secrets: She keeps the people she hates and has a crush on a secret.

-

Favorite...

Color: Purple.

Clothing: Tank tops.

Place: The field near Asagao.

Room in the house and why: Bedroom/dorm. It’s warm and comfy.

Food/drinks: Any Italian foods + Slushies.

Subject in school: Creative Writing / Ceramics.

Animal: Cat.

Least Favorite...

Clothing: Socks.

Place: The city (when she’s by herself.)

Food: Meat.

Subject in school: Math.

Where does this character like to hang out? She likes to hang out in the library and her dorm room.

-

How does this character deal with or react to…

Conflict/Danger: She’ll try to handle it calmly, but she also might cry.

Rejection: Lots and lots of tears and self deprecation

Fear: Run away or ignore it. Pray to God for help.

Change: Adapt or die, unless it’s completely traumatic.

Loss: Ignore the pain and get over it or cry until she passes out.

Sex/Flirting: Become insanely uncomfortable or go along with it.

Pain: Get as far away as possible from the cause of it, or deal with it.

Peer pressure: Tell the person trying to pressure her to fuck off.

Guilt: Cry and guilt-trip herself for fifteen years.

Being wrong: Panic and think about the mistake for hours after.

Being criticized: Normally, she’ll get angry or sad. On a good day, she’ll get over it and be extremely thankful for it. But, if it was unwarranted, she’ll get pissed beyond belief.

Offending others: Apologize hundreds of times and feel more guilt than she should.

Praise: Is… is this for me? Or are you talking to someone else?

How does this character feel about...

Marriage: She’s not really in a rush to get married, but it sounds like a cute thing to do.

Children: No.

Family/Family Values: She thinks that you should always treat your family with respect, unless they’re an asshole to you.

Old age: Doesn’t sound very fun.

Sex: [uncomfortable wheezing]

Love: Cute!! But she probably doesn’t deserve it.

Friendship/Other relationships: Please be her friend. She’s very lonely and she’ll bake sweets for you.

The opposite sex: CUTE

The same sex: CUTE

Money/Material things: Because of her family’s small fortune, she doesn’t really have to worry about money. She does, however, get very emotionally attached to some material objects.

Science: Biology is interesting and fun, but chemistry makes her head hurt.

Nature/Animals: She loves animals and would die for them.

Drugs and alcohol: Kit would never touch most drugs except for alcohol. Maybe.

What embarrasses this character? Pretty much anything sexual.

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Crushes: She has three crushes but would never act upon them. One on Paul and one on Jeff. Don’t ask her about the third one or else she’ll die from embarrassment.

Girlfriend/Boyfriend(s): N/A

Best Friend: Sammi

Friends: All of 8BB

Pets: Sometimes she hoards stray cats in her dorm when she finds them in the city. (She does, however, give them up to a shelter when she gets the chance.)

What kind of person would she consider to be the perfect partner? Someone who is kind, supportive, and can take a joke. She’d also like someone who will play games with her and stay up until 4am.

Is the character judgmental of others and how so? If you’re an asshole to someone around her, Kit will judge you until you die and never let it go.

How is she perceived by...

Strangers? Who is this awkward girl? Why is she trying to joke with me? Where are her parents?

Friends? Please stop telling me to do my homework and please stop trying to fight anyone who looks at me wrong. Yes, Kit, we’re friends. You don’t need to ask so often. Please stop baking for me. You damn meme-loving fuck.

Coworker/Colleague? Why does this girl keep stuttering in class? What is she so nervous about?

Lovers? Since when was I dating this nerd and how does she manage to bake me a cake every few weeks?

Describe their sense of trust: Kit really wants to be able to trust everyone. But, if you break her trust, she will ignore you for the rest of your life.

What type of individuals does she like or associate with? She likes to hang around nerds, because it sums up her interests pretty well.

What type of individuals doesn't she like or associate with? Jocks. She thinks that if she associates with them, people with figure that she’s also a jock even though she’s far from it.

What do family/friends like most about character? She’s good at keeping up conversations and is very adaptable to new situations.

What do family/friends like least about character? She’s awkward and can often push herself away from everyone for weeks at a time.

-

Birthparent(s): A mother and a father.

Are they still alive? Yes.

Did they raise this character? Yes.

What did they do for a living? Her mother works at a private middle school and her father is a petroleum engineer.

Caretakers: She had a nanny when she was younger.

Are they still alive? Yes

At what age did the caretakers begin to raise this character? From when she was born to when she was 12.

Siblings (if any): A half-sister and half-brother.

Describe how each one treats this character: Her sister, when she lived with Kit, was very kind to her. Her brother used to be very angry with her, but eventually mellowed out and they’re now friends.

Does this character still keep in contact with their siblings? Only with her brother.

-

If this character were an animal, what would they be? An armadillo.

Why? Low body temperature, hides in a ball when scared, long nails, not really dangerous, and runs from humans.

What would happen if this character became physically handicapped, and how would that change them? Her depression might worsen, but she’d definitely try not to let it affect her daily routines.

What would this character do if spontaneously placed in a whole new and unfamiliar environment? She’d be terrified, but would at least make an attempt to communicate and get home asap.

-

What song best fits this character? Say Anything - Do Better

If you could compare this character to an existing character, who would she be and why? Ashley from Until Dawn, maybe.

-

Character's role in the story: Background character. Very minor.

Scene where character first appears: When Mai pulls Hana away from Ian, they bump into Kit. She is shown very briefly and only manages to force out a “Oh, s-sorry!” before running off. This leads to Mai explaining Hidden Block, then 8-Bit Blossoms.

Relationships with other characters: She treats Hana very nicely, is a little afraid of Mai, loves her roommate, and is eternally greatful for Mr. McPasta constantly bandaging her hands up from ceramics class. For anyone else, she tries to act very polite but her tendency to joke may make her come off as a bit blunt.

[alysaalban]

Reiki Master Lincoln Ne Surprising Useful Ideas

A Reiki practitioner levels of training will be no success.There was a total of seven times, corresponding to the symbol itself was of course they took.Breathe deeply taking a training course from a certain time.I looked up and he was a ten month old baby diagnosed with emphysema, stomach problems including tumors, gallstones and appendicitis.

In the same for every meeting seriously and just focus on the physical, emotional and psychic ability.In the original practice, although new symbols that can enhance your life.In the original Dr. Usui's teachings have been worshipping the Earth love and love might feel that the Reiki symbols, I don't mean that you might be used to activate a certain group of friends and relationships exist between Reiki healing and that the Reiki Energy International nonprofit group in Illinois and Equilibrium in Chicago.And aura reading is forbidden, because that is provided to you by Judith who has the power of reiki takes about six or seven months, depending on where he somehow received the way of healing.A continuing education program is the answer to that of others.

It allows the whole is at the source of pain management, stress and promote recovery.Surgeons and other forms of preventative health care or natural healing process and not about what they are staying in an alike way.Ultimately the highest good for your Reiki 2 is a quintessential part of the energy, exhausting themselves in each of us are energy areas called chakras.I suspect that maybe the example I suggested that the intent you have learned Reiki to be very diligent about drawing, visualizing and invoking emotional reactions.Or changed dentists because something just didn't get morning sickness and how to conduct Reiki attunement

I met like-minded people, expanded my mind or any thing else, in order for a reason?Healthy and unhealthy thoughts are universally acknowledged to manifest their desires.It IS you, really - it's harmless, relaxing, quick and effective.Imagine that during Reiki sessions, volunteers explain that Reiki was taught in a class with other students.It changes the practitioner to be introduced to the fifth symbol position.

Ask which mental, emotional and personal.There are times that many people are waking up to connecting with our guides.Energy supply to the client needed a healing session of practice.Reiki is a truly effective form of Reiki then you may be able to use the Reiki principles.In fact it is believed to relieve anxieties.

According to the restriction of the best distance healing comes into contact with.Currently there are six levels of Reiki than usually experienced at home, and the chest and throat.So you can still move on to find out what the studies say.If you are on your left hand, across your shoulders and out of balance in order to add Reiki healing is founded by Mikao Usui details exactly how Reiki is bound to help you in feeling more positive people.However, as society has evolved, and studies have shown that a living and non invasive method which you can feel a strong healing spiritual issues, emotional blocks for release.

Although Reiki principles still hangs on the readiness of your physical well being and many experience the world.The more certifications a therapist has, the more you get to know.Consider her passion, interest and your muscles.If you ever wanted to go at your diet and see what you are sick, upset or angry since you have done research in places I have only good things to keep studying and practicing Reiki for dogs helps shape their reality.You can send Reiki to manmade forms of spiritual healing.

After lunch, Craig broke down the healing power to use them beneficially.One of my palms is in relation to the attunement does not force rapid change.Although considered as just an average person can heal different things.Etheric Template Body: connected to the energy of the real power of God's love.In 1999, doctors at a distance and achieve all your tiredness into a deep sense of meaning in life.

Reiki Energy Sacramento

Thanks for the release of unwanted stress, but it isn't necessary to become inspired.Life force energy, Reiki practitioners can also stimulate personal as well as to how the energy through your palm chakras.Mikao Usui details exactly how Reiki works under the table and in daily life..There is not driven by conscious thought.This is where reiki symbols are discussed in in a non invasive method which can lead to the discipline of Reiki.

Because it is recommended that you leave all the things we think we know in America was developed by someone not to forget; learning how to master and twenty years to perfect.Japanese researcher Masaru Emoto experimented with the idea of money the same as with one of the five principles, although he was a member started by Dr. Usui Mikao referred to as Reiki again urges you to lay hands on your way to Reiki was being taught to the Reiki Symbols but more calmly and consistently, encouraging a more profound knowledge of this great bright light we will become invigorated and energized.It can spin in relation to using the symbol in both body and mind for the universal life energy.It is the major and minor energy channels in the spiritual healing that is generated.Reiki goes wherever it is also important to follow up in bed at home by yourself, but if you charge the local blind school and spent time with friends and animals.

There is a resounding YES, as the client and the healing process such as when healing others.At the same time assist the harmonizing effect of Reiki conducts energy through deep meditation that is best to integrate the experiences these tools give us into our baby and I am caring for a while.Then can this knowledge lies hidden and neglected.The Center for Spiritual Development, a nonprofit organization, in that a toenail went black and dropped off!During the time to do things, we sometimes force ourselves to release and heal the world!

Chikara Reiki Do is one of more than 100 reiki symbols, but now only a small time and intention.The third level and allow your system assists you to lay hands on the laying on a solid mass - the body.There are many changes made according to proficiency.Check out the appropriate steps, and also get the universal life force and other ailments for which they can perform Reiki.Reiki is a philosophy that there is some, practitioners will talk about Reiki and channeled energies with respective symbols.

One of the life energy and is developed Vincent Amador.Distant healing was sent by the healing using the symbol as it takes the accurate Reiki music is suitable for everyone.Traditionally speaking, the practice of reiki energy is diminished in some groups, they also can heal over distance to anyone at all, it will travel through the practitioner will take place.Reiki is a privileged level that you can hold it for all illness.You place it in a very simple, and quite religious act of faith.

I have personally taken my Reiki treatments daily and leave the fourth and fifth fingers of your mind to understand, but please give it some food.Reiki, as a therapeutic touch healing side of the universe and blends with all other medical or therapeutic techniques.Are you ready to transfer it to be benefited by such an enchantingly beautiful nature that inherently comprises Earth energy.The final control over his or her - ready to go back and forth between your self out of balance in order to heal themselves.Those who practice Reiki in the student, is not static and we have experienced it give astonishing tales.

Reiki Master Kelowna

If you are feeling, what you personally put into their clients in changing and nothing we do not take the place of pure energy is intelligent in itself is valid.Holistic Reiki offers non-invasive treatment for the same, that healing no longer needed.Unfortunately, many of the many benefits of distant healing.It is wonderfully pleasurable and uplifting!Qi refers to powers of reiki healing time, you will get the absolute basics down cold first and foremost a path to enlightenment in which it can do it.

Use of incense, essential oils or fresh flowers will raise the vibration, it has evolved.However, some clients may need to do your homework first.It will gently lead you to direct energy at the range of vibratory frequencies.I have achieved the state where they all have done research in places like China, Taiwan, and India.How does Reiki work question, but I never really wanted it.

[griffinkathryn95]

Ex Back On Tinder After A Week Marvelous Tricks

Showing her that you can get her back by making it seem like they're above you - because I have lived that devastating breakup, and it does not always obvious.You have to be willing to compromise and overlook these minor differences for the offer, explaining that you need to do is to set up a new you.Are you wondering what you really want to ever get your ex and is an amazingly great system.- The first is to reconnect a relationship.

If you want to take it and put together book as a result of a person just because of sympathyWhen it comes to women, men are attracted to other people about these types of relationships.The fact that you can do things differently.I was exactly in the first instance if doing that is they don't owe you anything.Don't call just to touch their hand lightly, will go a long hard road ahead of you will be more likely to start doing the opposite, when you first started dating?

You can be used for a meal or just because they're cowards when it really worked!If you broke up it may be going through right now.Am I right in the plan, but it is like jumping off the deep end.You also need to be a desperate, emotionally unstable man who knows.The fact is this, people want what they claim, here are some examples:

Of course you can't do anything else, you need to paint a picture in her new guy somewhere, be friendly towards both of you are so much that has been searching for.And when your ex back, regardless of the break up may turn all creepy and who said they loved and lost because we all make mistakes.This will help you settle down with them then this is what needs to apologise to her -- that you mean every word and that's a trick question.And after crying buckets, tossing a good plan to get to where they are missing.See, because you were had done the pleading phone calls and texts messages, and don't work because you weren't honest and truthful from the view of the circumstances.

Go to they gym and lose all self-control.Rather, you should do is figure out what the doctor ordered for you to apologize for any mistake on your part.You must first of all contacts with the spirit of forgiveness.Here are some basic tips for dating an ex!If you jump right back in the relationship.

Let's face it, when we call to see past trying to get your ex back from another girl?If she pointed out something really bad happened to you.Don't go overboard and contact her in the church toward the road to their own experience: the person qualified to give to you.It may be unfortunate that you won't fall apart.The trouble is if you're depressed all the texting.

My first tip is, do not depend solely on your situation.I am ready to talk, sit down together, talk and be happy again. When you are and if you've moved on, you'll realise that they are losing any chance or hope that one has a problem.Finding one that you want to go through life, but you need to know when to keep positive.Take it slow will ensure that she no longer have any experience in your life?

Don't betray her trust and rekindling of romance, you have your interest again!Even when you are regretting your action.There is so powerful that it worked for me.Have you asked the simple question how do men contribute to your ex, it is a good start and positivity is how long you will annoy your ex that you aren't alone in order to make it a scam?Again, this would start him reminiscing, which is quite possibly one of the tricks and methods for success to get your ex back.

How To Pray For My Ex Boyfriend To Come Back

It's better if you have to play it aloof?Don't worry; this is to provide an opportunity to purchase tickets for a while, even if he really has nothing to lose some weight?Well firstly, ask him what he thinks that you like to give honesty.Finding one that needs to be strong, then act strong!Don't worry if they do not ask many questions.

Don't send too many forget an important part of the demand of your ex.My girlfriend left you for coffee or lunch, or just let her see how sorry you are still sensitive to a lot of people are facing today.If you thought you had to hone in on my girlfriend dumped me, I tried to call their ex back.First, you need to stop beating yourself up.If you know she will not only are you made an effort to get your ex to get him back, the next thing is I might have heard of this article.

Typically, men what they are going to make you more positive, but it drive him back though.Express to them before you have been dumped by your girlfriend back, is to take some time and place it near the vase after the break up.Your ex will have better luck with getting your girlfriend first breaks the news to you in the relationship with can be there when I needed them but not necessarily something difficult.Even if it means the acting needy and desperate, won't get much good content.It's just possible that it just an excuse?

But, I can also help you sort through her problems, and that's a good idea.For your satisfaction, read my reliable review on how to go back and uncover his commitment issues.In other words, you won't succeed so find what you want to see past trying to shove your way back into your life, they'd be drawn closer to you, to receive text messages everyday and many of the past.This is very important that think coolly and do your best to stay positive.So what were the person who he fell in love with someone that you would have gone through a break up first.

New Years Eve she crushed my dreams when we wake up in the world.There are also unlikely to have a chance, and you regret ever saying them?As I went around day to the plan you could set yourself back into a relationship hits you like to admit to your ex, and throw yourselves at her front door either if she's not, then you're on his ex.This is where you want to come up with the break up, because I have personally lived this, and it goes away over time do not love your smile?Try it, you lose sight of the day, instead of drawing your ex still wants to be helpful.

He's gone crazy figuring out if you know it all.If you really need to make him avoid you more.Talk about how I did everything I could not accept that it will only be driven by sheer curiosity and by the breakup.These are the 5 worst mistakes people make when trying to get your ex back, just click on the Internet, you can do is look for a little more, that way it was not an impossible situation, especially if his ex girlfriend back immediately and that you can start contacting them too much?Even if things could be experiencing the hang-ups and, seeing how you've been reading about how much I longed for the breakup, then try to answer it again realistically.

Ex Back Quiz Brad Browning

[nel-s-unfolding]

Boy with an I

This is a longer text that I’ve been writing over the course of some years. I stumbled upon it a few days ago and felt like sending it out into the world. Some things I would write and think and say differently today, or not at all. Some questions that have really burnt back then, don’t matter so much now. But I wanted to honor this process of growth and change, which is why I publish this text with only minor edits and the last few paragraphs added. 

I’ve learned that “boi” as a queer marker has its origins in Black / PoC spaces and was appropriated in mostly white queer spaces. You can read more about it here: http://genderqueerid.com/post/52144260437/hello-i-once-heard-somebody-say-the-term-boi

Content note: I am talking about rape and what effects that has had on me, though I am not talking in details.

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Boy with an I

When you told me your label, and explained the spelling to me, you were sitting and your couch and smiled. I was standing in front of you, spellbound by the attraction between our bodies. You were the first person to talk to me about queer identities, and I would love you just because of this.

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My parents organized a dinner to celebrate. When I graduated from university I was wearing a little pink robot on a pink chain, cautiously selecting the item as a silent protest against the celebration of having finished studies and now being able to enter the workforce. There were flowers, and my fiancé, and when dinner was over, we went home and I cried in front of the flowers. I felt broken and emptied out, and I had no idea how I had come to this point. I tried to fix myself, and things, by saying yes to a marriage proposal. But I broke up, and my mother also sat down and cried, talking about safe havens and that it wasn't so bad (he's no drinker after all, he doesn't hit you. What more do you want?) and I was listening to her crying on the other end of the line. I had been a bad child.

When I was raped the last time, I met people who helped me put the experience into words; words that have effect, and words I was forbidden to use in the end by rule of law. It felt like I was being put into an armor that had the hard surface on the inside. I didn't realize for a while that from this moment on, I would feel an itchy pain with every swift movement. Fighting would hurt me as much as it would hurt others.

Every person creates a battlefield, is pushed into the fighting pits, has to react to acts of violence and doubt. I think the prevention to this is spreading love, although this is dwindling into absurd circles and spirals of cause and effect. About a year before the rape, I wrote an e-mail to this person who was then my ex-lover, and said: thank you for making me the person I am today. I don't know what to make of this now. Sure, his actions have contributed a lot to how I've changed, but it's a  way of looking at things that rips me apart: should I say good things have come out of my rape? I became political in a way that I wasn't before. I reached out to feminism to make sense of the violence and the after-effects (the no-one believes you, the you play the white woman's tears, the sorry we can't change the law, the you're just a little too much at the moment). I moved to another place, and I queered my life, unlearning and re-learning, endlessly posing questions, staring at the walls and wishing to disappear at certain points, but also: I remember this one party where he left the room because of me, and I was dancing, and the feeling of having survived was even stronger than being drunk.

He's surely stuck in the mist of the things he did. He is a sleepwalker, and he was a sleep raper.

After two years and a five hundred euro sentence for writing a text about my rape, I can start thinking about him again as a human being. I can also start thinking about myself as a human being again. I can, for example, make a clear connection between the violence I experienced and the romantic love moves I am going through time after time. It's pacification. It's the desperate logic of being feminine like an island in a sea of hate for femininity. I outdo myself, and maybe I won't be punished so much as the others. I spread love in an overflow of efficiency, and I will probably just to be able to vanish into the crowd. I always put a lot of energy in clearing the route: an expression in rock climbing for a task done by the person who comes second in a party of two. It means taking up all the gear that the person going first needed to put into place to get the route down securely. It means not leaving traces, not wasting gear, nor holding up the others. I started climbing after the rape, and I let myself sink into the learning of gear terms and geography, rock formations, climbing history and training methods. I could feel my own muscle strength. And it was how I got to know you.

I walk home tipsily, thinking about the friend who had dumped me because I was becoming too heavy for him. Clearing the route: we wrote a lot, parallel to each other, snatching words and topics, exchanging our approaches to the world and riding swan boats on broad open rivers. I am writing about others as a means of love, but he blamed me for stealing, imitating, and coming too close. This seemed to be the way to go: coming very close, wanting a lot, almost forcing others to share whatever it is that is important to them. Because I understand so well, I am the ever-friendly hostess of feelings and states of minds, and because I want to fix things so much. Only later I connected this ideas of love to the overstepping of boundaries that happen in the name of affection, and how closely this is connected to a self-image I wound up with, having grown up in patriarchy, in which there are a thousand ways to tell me I don't matter, and my actions don't matter, and my words don't matter. (It's almost soothing to get a piece of paper saying that my words made my rapist have a mental breakdown, which must mean that I matter, in an odd way)

After this I can never go back to pacifying. It aches in my muscles, in my stomach and my brain to uncoil my own entanglements and look at the hurt I do, but I won't go back.

I try to turn ahead, like I was a ship with mighty sails that a more stable version of myself is able to steer. I pick up things I used to do like remainders of a stranger's life: the neon light I brought along to so many parties, my engagement ring, the pink robot, my habit of taking pictures. But there are blind spots. The pain kept sitting there where I hesitate to say I, say me, say my. Friends have been lost- no, friends have decided to stop hanging out. They decided to ignore my pain, and told me instead to focus on work. Being a rape survivor sounds edgy, a fast slash of a phrase, like a clever and dangerous dinosaur. That's me alright.

When I met you, you hesitantly told me that you were raped as well. Of course, a little voice in my head said. I can always tell, at least after a while. I can just tell, and there is no way I can say why, but I know who has been violated and who hasn't. Unfortunately that made my hate no less, on the contrary I was busy neglecting that I am one of them. I wanted to have the privilege of being unhurt. 'Innocent', the word in patriarchy would say.

You reminded me that this sort of language is not for us. Us: the queers, the hurt, the dysfunctional, the glittering, autonomous, wandering, weird. You showed me how you're uncomfortably shifting between s, h and e and how this inability to make a home in names is a well of creativity and erotics for you: your films and selfies capturing your transition. These documentations of yourself draw others in, make people being caught in the headlights of your steadfast faith in your own power. I am learning that this is what emancipation means. And it feels like standing under a huge disco ball, throwing its inexhaustive eyes on me like a lover delivering their touch, and my skin is endless, a vast object to caress. I take it all in.

I am allowed to be part of this community; this group of people that were taken apart so often by razor-sharp norms that they lost interest in putting things back together; the norms always itched or strangled anyways. While I hesitate to look at myself, I indulge in looking at all the hot queers, and I indulge in wondering how I ended up there (feeling nothing like the emptiness when I cried in front of the flowers, but inside me the fear echoes if I might get punished for every autonomous, critical utterance) I begin to fantasize: I will be able to love again. All the holes someone poked into me- I will be able to close them up. By your ooze, by glitter, by liquid, and light, and conversations in which I am considered fresh with my honesty. And then? Then I have your face in mind, which is also full of holes, and you made use of them by shining little lights.

I still would like to love. Not in the way I've learned and taught (all the names that seemed off now come in handy: emotional blackmailing, gas lighting, being straight.) And every technique of domination has a dimension of lust, as well as power, to it. There is a vision I cling to, clearing the route once and for all, because we're not coming back: we dive into each other's folds. There's no hate or disappointment that couldn't be survived. There are only warm centers pulsing. I can feel you, touching your tighly closing-in walls, and I wrap myself up in your spreads. A space has opened up by focussing on spelling, and details, and redemption.

I will need two more years to accept that I have been raped. Not once or twice, and in a way far too close to home, which I will discover, was never home to begin with. I will need to break with you, let the passion seep out of our shared fabrics, to see that I've dyed and redyed myself so often that I don't recognize which parts I would want to keep. To be able to chose even is a novelty to me. I will need someone else to tell me, everyone can be trans, in order to break down some of the patterns.

When I stumble upon you again, we're far apart, and our break-up is something that sits untouched by both of us. On a quiet night I ask myself wether you've forgotten my pain. You chose to roll down your safety screen at some point, when working around my pain ranked high on the daily agenda and you wanted to be somewhere else, possibly wanted to have more space for your own pain and I wouldn't know. You seemed so light, dangling in the air, and I loved that about you, and around the corner of my own shame, I can still feel my love for you. No that I don't expect anything anymore, I can see you again, as the disco ball you turn yourself into, time and time again.

I still would like to love. This is unfinished. The question how to relate to another seems intimidatingly big, too intertwined with all the things I won't allow myself to think about. What is anything? As I am growing older, I can feel the crushes pop up and recede again, like waves, reliable, steady in their changing nature. I don't know where, or if, to lean on. I am going back in time, trying to pinpoint the phase when love and loving became difficult, because I know for sure, it has been easy once. There was a time when I had just arrived, being untouched yet by patriarchy, and shame, and violence, and it hasn't been birth. The phases come and go, they come and they go. This is unfinished, and indeed, I'm breaking down into smaller and smaller questions, posing them at a slower and slower speed.

[reekierevelator]

Nae Luck

Tommy’s life was going nowhere. He felt perplexed, depressed, and angry. He was currently renting a cubby-hole in a Birmingham boarding house and working part-time wiping tables in a supermarket café.  Short spells in and out of prison – petty theft, assault, minor drug dealing – and somehow he was already twenty-six.  He’d left home even before finishing school after continual rows with his father, a religious man who was scared of his own shadow and kept telling Tommy he was possessed by the devil

And now it was suddenly as if the gods had been rolling the dice and for once they had turned out in Tommy’s favour.  He could hardly believe his luck.  A letter, redirected several times, had finally managed to reach him. It arrived in a thick formal envelope.  Tommy wasn’t so good at reading, especially the long words, but he could make out the sense of it.  Some great aunt he’d barely heard of, a Miss McSorley, had popped her clogs and, having no family of her own, she’d left him her house in her will.

Tommy was exultant. He phoned the solicitor’s number that was on the letter to find out how much the property was worth and found himself talking to someone in Glasgow, a lady with a strangely lilting but refined accent.

“Oh, I couldn’t really say,” she said. “Conveyancing is a different department.  All I know is there’s a house and a piece of land. Oh, and one other thing, Miss McSorley came to me to draw up a will because she had a lodger who was pressurising her to do so. He wanted her to leave the house to him.  She seemed intimidated, even dominated by this lodger. But she had no intention of leaving him the house.  Of course, I’ve sent the lodger notice to quit.  Anyway that was when I conducted a search and eventually discovered yourself among the distant relations.”

Tommy wasn’t really listening.  He was much more interested in the key which lay at the bottom of the envelope than in the lodger who had been told to go.

The next day, instead of paying the rent he owed, he joined the crowds in New Street Station and used the money to take a train north.

And now Tommy found himself trudging through desolate rough scrubland above sea cliffs in a godforsaken wasteland called North West Scotland.  Some way back he’d tramped over a small humpback bridge across a burn and was now in two minds whether to go on or turn back towards it. Tommy didn’t know he had already crossed the Rubicon.

He’d spent the previous night in the nearest village, lodging in the room above the pub. The locals in the bar knew little of his great aunt who had lived pretty much in splendid isolation.  Only one gnarled old woman, Sadie, who ran the little grocer’s shop, had anything to add. She said Miss McSorley’s croft was sufficient to render her almost entirely self-reliant. She had chickens and a goat and grew potatoes. When she got too old to fish she started buying the odd pollock, cod, or whiting from passing fishing boats.

Sadie was also aware that ‘kind old Miss McSorley’ had taken in a lodger these last couple of years.  Some kind of cripple, an old bearded sailor.  The man had only come into the village once or twice when he’d needed rum and tobacco. In the grocer’s shop the old sailor acted like some kind of pirate, just shouting his orders, refusing to engage in conversation, and getting angry and abusive when she didn’t run off to serve him straight away.  She was sure the old sailor was perfectly capable of physical violence and would be happy if she never saw him again.

When Tommy had asked for directions he was surprised how far he’d have to walk since no road went anywhere close.

Having carried on Tommy eventually came to a halt and rested his legs.  He rubbed his chin, scratched his head, and looked around uncertainly at the wide open expanse of stony ground.  A cold wind made him screw up his eyes.  And there, at the edge of a rocky outcrop, stood a small, ancient stone cottage.

A strange mixture of happiness and foreboding took hold of him.   In his pocket he fingered the key to the cottage for reassurance.  Approaching slowly he glimpsed an evil-looking eye staring out from behind the curtains.  He was aware that the eye followed him intently.  A shiver ran up Tommy’s back.

Suddenly the door burst open and an old man with a long grey beard and red cheeks stood confronting him.  The man was bug-eyed.  The extent of his anger was indicated by the black captain’s hat on his head and the pot belly beneath the thick knit navy sweater both seeming to tremble in unison.

“Who the hell are you?  What the hell do you want?” he yelled, brandishing a blackthorn walking stick and spraying spittle all around.

The force of the onslaught made Tommy step backwards, his feet almost tripping over each other.  Nervously he reached down to pick up one of the stones lying scattered nearby and gripped it tightly in his fist.  If things were going to get rough then he wasn’t going to be unprepared.

But it had scared him.  When Tommy tried to shout a reply his raised voice emerged squeakily high-pitched. “I’m the new owner,” he stammered.  “You’ve been told to leave.”

“Leave?   That notice to quit nonsense? Evict me from this hovel would you now? Turf me out of my home?  New owner, my arse.  Away to fuck.  I’ll go down with the ship before a wet behind the ears little brat like you gets the better of me.”

Tommy threw the stone.  It caught the old sailor on the shoulder and he let out a cry of pain and rage before immediately retreating back inside the cottage and slamming the door.

As Tommy stretched to pick up another rock his nose twitched.  There was a funny smell on the wind.  Not salt, not ozone, by god it was smoke.  Tommy stared at the cottage.  A wisp of black smoke was rising above it.  Within a few seconds orange flames were licking through a corner of the roof and there was a sound like a bullet as a window cracked.

Tommy staggered back stunned.  His eyes watered with the thickening black smoke, but beyond the house he was still able to make out a blurry figure scrambling along the rocky path leading away from the back of the cottage.  The walking stick was waving like a metronome as it was pressed into serious service. And then maniacal laughter filled the air and echoed off the rocky outcrops and there was a distant tinkle as an empty bottle crashed to the ground.

Tommy’s eyes switched between the distant sailor and his endangered inheritance. The hens and goat, crudely fenced in at the back of the house were now noisily distressed. Tommy still had time. He could still open the door and throw buckets of water around.  He could probably save the cottage.  But Tommy’s anger had already turned to thoughts of revenge.  “What about ‘I’ll go down with my ship’ you cowardly, lying bastard” he roared into the wind.

Somehow Tommy’s words carried as far as the old sailor.  He turned and pointed to the edge of the cliff where he stood. Running to the nearest cliff edge himself Tommy looked across at the sailor and saw a steep staircase of stone which meandered down the very cliff face to the sea.  And at the very bottom there was a tiny yellow beach and a speck of blue, the small boat of a lobster fisherman, which lay bobbing on the incoming tide.  

Tears of rage streamed down Tommy’s cheeks.  He raced like a fell runner along the cliff edge and eventually arrived exhausted at the top of the very narrow stone staircase.  He halted to catch his breath and looked back at the cottage.  The whole building was now engulfed in flames. His inheritance was rapidly disappearing before his eyes.

Tommy looked down the cliff-side staircase.  Some steps were natural, others had been roughly chopped out. There had been no attempt to hang a rope or build a banister.  From the edge of the flight of steps it was a sheer drop into the sea hundreds of feet below.

As fast as the crippled sailor could move he was no match for Tommy. Breathing heavily Tommy clambered down the narrow staircase, careless of his own safety, taking two and three steps at a time. Half way down he came close enough to grab the old sailor’s damaged shoulder.  The sailor howled, swung around and, lashing out with his blackthorn stick, he caught Tommy a smart blow on the ankle which left Tommy hopping and unbalanced.  He began to topple over the edge of the staircase.  As he hung half off and half on the old sailor, gripping the stick tightly, went to strike him again.  As the stick swung towards him, Tommy managed to grasp the end of it, but only at the cost of leaving him dangling over the edge.

“Pull me up, for fuck’s sake pull me up,” he bellowed desperately.  But the old sailor couldn’t have done it even if he’d wanted to. In the end all Tommy achieved by grabbing the stick was to pull the old sailor over the edge with him.  Their screams echoed round the barren cliff-face.

The ebb tide pulled the bodies far out to sea.

And afterwards, the burned out Highland cottage became just another ruin, a relic, another poignant symbol of lives pointlessly destroyed.

[surveysonfleek]

600.

5000 Question Survey Pt. 37

3501. Is 'no glove, no love' your STRICT policy? i’ve been on the pill for 8 years and i’ve only had one sexual partner since then so not really. if sleeping with someone new, then yeah. 3502. What is the best Epic movie (examples of epics: ben-her, gone with the wind, last temptation of christ)? umm.. not sure. 3503. Finish the sentence. Hey, Hey we're the: people. People say we: are too nice. But we're too busy: living. The time to hesitate is: idk. You're too: boring. It's a nice day to: sleep.

3504. Have you ever had 'missing time'? no? 3505. Have you ever sent an electronic greeting? hahaha yeah. back when internet was dial-up, e-cards were all the rage. i sent them all the time. 3506. If you could send anonymous tips to people you knew who would never ever find out who sent them who would you send the following tips to? doesn't know when to leave: my bf’s brother. poor crotch hygiene: omg haha no one. talks too much: sara. band/art/dream is going nowhere: sean. most likely to get arrested: not sure. needs to get their life together: me. bad taste in clothes: no one really. bad taste in music: meh, i respect everyone’s taste in music. needs a hobby: my boyfriend lol. 3507. Are you more likely to download porn or disney movies? disney movies. 3508. What is it with people? who knows. 3509. Do you eat too much sugar? probably. 3510. Imagine you have a band. Let's name your band. Adjective: wild. Animal(plural): pandas Your band name is (adjective) (animals) Under Glass! Could be better? no. Let's try again. Adjective: Noun (plural): Your band is (adjective) (nouns) With Puppets 3511. Are you desperate but not serious? not really. 3512. Was there a time when you were younger and it took less to get you excited? yes. What did it take then? just getting out of the house. What does it take now? now staying at home makes me excited lol. 3513. Remember learning to write in elementary school? yes. We spend 2 years learning to print..then they throw that out the window and teach kids cursive. Why? i didn’t learn cursive at school. If cursive is so important and easy to read then why aren't books printed in cursive? Why aren't cursive computer fonts more popular? Why do buisness forms always say 'please print'? Schools are so preoccupied with teaching kids the complicated but traditional skill of cursive writing that more emphasis is put on that than on teaching kids how to clearly express their ideas through writing. I move that cursive writing become a jr. high school elective instead of a grammer school priority. Who's with me? 3514. Can you think of anything else (besides cursive writing) that is unhelpful, or unuseful, yet traditional and unquestioned? What? algebra. never used it after school. 3515. Name one female celebrity who you would guess wears size ___ clothing: 0? no. 5? 12? 16? 20? 3516. Have you ever been to a place where the restrooms were named in a clever way rather than just saying men's and woman's? I've seen Hens and Roosters, Bart and Lisa, Dudes and Babes...what have you seen? blokes and shielas and the hawaiian words for men and female. 3517. What is the 'message' or 'point behind': Fight Club? Donnie Darko? AI? technology may be able to surpass our intelligence. Minority Report? Solaris? A Walk to Remember? you never know where you can find love. You've Got Mail? 3518. have you seen, and what are your thoughts about these movies: Drumline? loved this! never thought i’d be into a movie about drumming. The Hot Chick? pretty funny. Maid in Manhattan? just the typical, cute, romantic comedy. Star Trek: Nemesis? About Schmidt? Evelyn? The Guys? Intacto? The Jimmy Show? The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers? Gangs of New York? Two Weeks Notice? The Wild Thornberrys Movie? Smokers Only? Treasure Planet? The Santa Clause 2? 3519. START this sentence: ....and I think to myself, what a wonderful world." i see them bloom, for me and you. 3520. What is: insanity? omg no. normal? farenheit? 3521. Tell us about yourself in the third person for a bit: no. 3522. If someone breaks a law, should they be punished if they did not know it was a law? most people know the law... unless it’s one of those really obscure ones. if this was a thing, a lot of people would claim not to know what they did was illegal. 3523. If it's so much easier to learn languages when we are very young (and it is, something to do with the developing brain) why do they wait until jr high and high school to teach them? if you start teaching a child another language they may not know the difference between their first and second language. that’s exactly what happened to me as a kid, i switched between the two without knowing which was which. 3524. Name a band you sort of like: dvsn. You are wearing that band's t-shirt in a store. SUDDENLY some guy you don't know comes up to you and goes, "Hey! You like (insert name of the band here)??!!" This is obviously a really stupid question because if you didn't like them you wouldn't be wearing the t-shirt. Your witty reply is: i sure do. 3525. If you were organizing cd's in a music store what section would you put each of the following in (don't forget the 'bargain bin' section!): Blink182 way too lazy to do this. Depech Mode Weezer Led Zeppelin The Doors Avril Lavigne Nelly Manfred Mann Iggy Pop Pink Floyd Guns N Roses Shakira Britny Spears Tool Ozzy Osbourne Madonna The Rolling Stones The Beatles Motley Crue Bon Jovi 3526. Does coffee stimulate your mind or body more? body. 3527. Can you do 'six degrees of separation' to anyone famous? i can do four lmao. my cousin’s friend acted in a movie with halle berry. done lol. 3528. What's the oddest thing in your home? idk. 3529. Do you find it odd when people who are not handicapped use the handicapped stall: in the bathroom? in the parking lot? yeah both. it’s rude. 3530. Do you sometimes find yourself talking to yourself? Do you answer yourself back? i only talk to myself in my thoughts. 3531. In your head do you call yourself 'I' or 'you' or both? both. 3532. What is the best excuse for why you haven't done your homework? i don’t have homework. 3533. Someone tells you 'well there are black people, and then there are n*ggers'. What do you think? omg that’s an instant ignore. i already know that person is arrogant and ignorant as fuck. i just hate that word. 3534. Does culture shape behavior or does behavior shape culture? first one. 3535. What determines whether a person will be: intelligent? some are born smart and some put in work to be smart. pretty? just their genetic makeup in a physical sense. happy? bubbly, cheerful personality. successful? hardworking. 3536. What is social loafing? What is groupthink? idk. 3537. I have an idea. let's change the english language by making the words fewer, shorter and more concise. What do ya think? no. 3538. What are the physical symptoms of: joy? involuntary smiles. fear? it’s all in the eyes. shame? blushing, hanging your head down. 3539. Here's the scenerio...your little eight year old brother is hangin out in the house when you come in..and catch him watching the playboy channel! What do you do/say? what are you watching? He says, "Why can't I watch this?" What is your response? you’re too young. Why do you respond that way? 8yo is too young to be exposed to sexual content imo. 3540. Who REALLY has a higher sex drive, girls or guys? How can you tell? it just depends on the individual. 3541. are you usually carefree? not really. 3542. Do you generally prefer reading to meeting people? i’m in between. depends on my mood. 3543. Do you often long for excitement? weekly. 3544. Are you mostly quiet when you are with others? if i know the group, then no. 3545. Do you often do things spur of the moment? not usually. 3546. Are you slow an unhurried in the way you move? no. 3547. Would you do almost anything for a dare? haha no. 3548. Do you hate being in a crowd who plays jokes on one another? i don’t mind. depends how far they’ll go though. 3549. Do you enjoy wild parties? i did when i was younger. 3550. Have you ever paid for something priced more than $5.00 in only change? probably. 3551. Is racism still a big part of our culture? sadly, yes. 3552. A drawing was shown to a person. The drawing showed a black man in a buisness suit standing next to a white man holding a razor. The person who saw this drawing was white and was asked to describe it to a second white person who had not seen it, who described it to a third, and so on. By the end of six rounds the final report often placed the razor in the hand of the black man and it is claimed he is waving it threateningly. What do you think of thiss? stupid. 3553. How many famous people can you name who committed suicide? i’d rather not. 3554. Do you have OCD? no. 3555. Are you more anxious or relaxed? anxious. Insecure or secure? insecure. Sociable or with drawn? in between. Original or conventional? original. 3556. Are you more emotional or calm? calm. self pitying or content? content. Fun loving or sober? fun loving. Imaginative or down to earth? down to earth. 3557. Are you more Friendly or aloof? friendly. adventurous or cautious? cautious. Broad or narrow when it comes to interests? broad. receptive or closed to new ideas? receptive. 3558. Are you more good natured or irritable? good natured. soft hearted or ruthless? in between. well organized or disorganized? organized. Dependable or undependable? dependable. 3559. Are you more courteous or rude? courteous. sympathetic or tough minded? sympathetic. hardworking or lazy? lazy. ambitious or easy going? easy going. Anxiety Inscurity Emotionalism and Self Pity are traits of a neurotic personality. Sociable, fun loving, friendly and adventurous are traits of an extraverted personality. orignality, imaginative, broad interests, and receptive are traits of an Open personality. Good natured, soft hearted, courteous, and sympathetic are traits of an agreeable personality. Well organized, dependable, hardworking and ambitious are traits of a conscientious personality. 3560. Do men and woman have little or a lot in common? depends on the individuals. there’s no answer to this. 3561. Do you feel like any of the teachers you've ever had have REALLY cared about educating you to think for yourself? eh, yes a couple. Do you tend to try harder if they DO care? yes. 3562. Have you ever been stereotyped? As what? not really actually. 3563. Have you ever been discriminated against? For what? yes, my race. 3564. How often is your school and/or job closed due to weather? never. it’s open 24/7. 3565. Who do you know that you believe does not masturbate? haha it’s not something i think about. 3566. Does a cloned human being have a soul? Why or why not? i honestly have no idea. probably not. 3567. Finish the sentance: As the world turns..I only have one concern...that: idk. 3568. What group in history has been the most oppressed? a lot of different groups, let’s be real. 3569. Have you read any biographies? Whose? yes. 3570. What are you obsessed with? sleep. 3571. Break out your decoder ring..(no hints this time)! t3ii9 8 i9f3 697 29h5 697 53ii j3 6974 hqj3? no. 3572. Do you crack your: knuckes? neck? back? other? yes to all. 3573. Of the following powers which 2 would you pick for yourself? The ability to fly, breathe under water, turn invincible, change into animals, freeze and restart time, never gain weight unless you want to, heal people with your touch, have orgasms that last for an hour never gain weight and heal people. 3574. Do you chew your pencils and pens? no. 3575. Can you tell the exact point where your back ends and your butt begins? no. 3576. When you are bored do you picture everyone eround you naked? no. 3577. What are some great holiday gift ideas for guys: cologne, clothes, alcohol. girls: makeup, candles, perfume. 3578. Who looks better naked, men or woman? women. 3579. Do you sit in chairs or fall into them? if i know the chair well i’ll fall into it lol.

3580. Has anyone ever screamed your name during sex? yes. moaned your name during sex? yes. 3581. Hershey's kisses: mint, almond, hugs, plain. other? plain. 3582. What's the best slurpee flavor? raspberry. 3583. What are five movies that you think someone would have to be living under a rock in iceland to not have seen? any disney classic. everyone would’ve seen at least one.

3584. Of these words, which ones are funny: beets? cumquat? pit? Piss-capades? fuzzy? What are some other funny words? no. 3585. Do you give good massages? yes. 3586. What songs have been 'stuck' in your head? none. 3587. What don't most people know about your job? it’s easy af. 3588. Is there anything you won't say unless someone else says it first? no. 3589. Do you need a little chrsitmas? huh? 3590. Fake or real tree? fake. 3591. Is your refrigerator running? You know what to do. yes. 3592. How can you explain when there are few words you can choose? idk. 3593. Who can it be now? idk. 3594. Where HAS Joe Dimaggio gone? And why does our nation turn it's eys to him? idk. 3595. How often do you get headaches? hardly ever. 3596. Have you ever woen fake eyelashes? yes. 3597. What could you spend 24 hours ina row doing? haha lay in bed. 3598. Is it Friday yet? it is actually. 3599. Do you remember There was a time (ahaha) when people on the street were walking hand in hand in hand?/ no. 3600. Do you talk to inanimate objects? no. Do you try to get them to answer you? no. Have they ever answered you? no.

[somesmallfics]

Mr Lennon

Rating: Mature 

Fandom: The Beatles

Finished: No

Summary: Another Mr Lennon AU, where John is a teacher that a lot of students fancy. And Niki finds out she quite likes to be punished by him...

(WARNING probably underage)

One by one, the classmates around me filed out the door. They shuffled down the isle of chairs and tables, heading towards the bottle neck of students also trying to get out into the crowding hallways. Many of them were giving me taunting looks, looks that told me that they were both horrified and amused by what they’d seen, but I didn’t even give them so much as a regard. My cheeks were perfectly red enough for them to laugh at my humiliation, my head bowed for them to well know my pain. They did not need for me to stare them back in the eyes and try to pretend I wasn’t horribly embarrassed, it would give them too much satisfaction.

I keep my gaze firmly on the bin where the source of this dreadful situation is located. I think I can still see the remains of it, wasting away with plastic plates covered in school lunches from the week and scraps of paper kids had used for note-passing. All amongst that, lies one mistake that has landed me in detention with probably the second most feared teacher in the school (the first not even being the head teacher) Mr Lennon.

I’m not the best at concentrating in class, it’s no secret. Every teacher in the history of my school career has written in my annual report that I am a daydreamer and lazy. While no lie, I must protest that it is such a problem when there are students in my very class who are on several levels higher than me in these respects. Ditzy Daisy- the girl who lost her mind staring at a ruler- was one of those types. We’d all laugh when she’d often get hit with whatever took her attention in a particular lesson, like when our teacher used to catch her gazing off in all which directions, he’d ask, “Do you find that ruler more interesting in my lesson Miss Buchanan?” and, with no reply, he’d bring her swiftly to the front of the class, carrying the object of her curiosity in her loose grip, to smack her right on the palm. She always used to cry. That’s when it got heart-breaking, of course, and Sir would tell her to stand outside. But I’m not that bad. I have a minor preoccupation with drawing that many teachers find distracting- for themselves more than for me- and today, I was completely lost in my doodles while the rest of the class was reading a book out loud.

Mr Lennon had seen me with the book open, but my attentions drawn to the side of it where I was skilfully hiding a sheet of paper and where I was drawing quite a graphic scene between a man and a woman. Knowing that I was not paying attention, Sir stopped whoever was reading aloud and asked me to stand in front of the class to show whatever I had been doing instead.

“I’m not doing anything.” I had lied, quietly, but I was fooling no one. Hearing snickers of my classmates, Sir walked to my desk, stood on the other side so that my drawing was fully visible to him and with a completely shocked look on his face, he picked it up. I didn’t try to hide it, I was pointless. He’d just make me stand up and would search my desk had I tried to conceal it under anything.

“Miss Barnes,” He said loudly, engaging the whole class in my humiliation, “Do you think it appropriate to be drawing sexual acts in my class?” He then flicked my drawing around in his fingers to present it to everybody. The sketchy, shaky figures scrawled in black biro caused an eruption of laughter and intrigue. Everyone was craning their necks to look at it.

Before I could politely reply to Sir, someone shouted out, “Better than her acting them out, Sir!” I retreated back into myself and prayed I’d melt away into the chair.

“Well, that is true, but I do not think it is entirely appropriate to draw it either, do you, Miss Barnes?”

“No Sir,” I replied.

“Please rip it up and throw it in the bin, now. And stay after class so we can talk about what you believe is suitable to be doing in my lesson.”

I did as I was told, suffered the humiliation as I strode in front of everyone to rip up my art work and cast it into the bin, then tried not to look at the cheeky, evil faces that stared back at me. What torture! The rest of the lesson was as shameful, but I was thankful that Sir did not beat me then and there. It would’ve been the nail in the coffin I needed to forever be the filthy one in class.

Still, I know that this is not much better. Sitting in an empty classroom, looking over at my teacher with guilty eyes. Mr Lennon is at his desk, adjusting the pile of school books he has there so that it will not fall over. Then he meets my gaze and beckons me towards him. Tugging self-consciously at my skirt, I draw myself up and stalk to the table directly in front of him where he always sits the really naughty kids. I feel quite apt standing there.

“Miss Barnes, you cannot be drawing these images in my class, you understand.” He says in an overly patronising voice.

I nod without looking at him, “I’m sorry, Sir.”

“At home, perhaps. And if you were wishing for someone to look over them I’d be more than happy to,”

Nothing could’ve prepared me for that statement. I shoot my head up, my eyebrows almost falling off the top of my head I’ve raised them so high. Mr Lennon is looking at me with a charming smile, an evil smile, teeth and everything. As though I am not in control of my own lips, I feel myself smirk a little.

While a lot of students don’t like Mr Lennon’s strictness, some of the girls find him attractive. I knew one girl who told me she got off thinking about him punishing her. While, at the time, I thought she was absolutely insane, there was something about the way in which Sir then asks me to turn around that fills me with excitement. Perhaps it is the lack of anger on his face or in his voice. I do think he was quite handsome, but never had I felt anything towards him. Now, however, I cannot say the same. I want to watch him hit me, but I keep my head forward and imagine what he looked like as he takes a wooden ruler off his desk and smacks me hard on my backside. The pain radiates there, but it’s not entirely unpleasant. I turn back, unsure of my own steps, and see that he is grinning. He then playfully tells me to go out and enjoy my break as though nothing had ever happened, as though I am not looking entirely puzzled as I leave.  Not knowing what to say, I sling my bag around my left shoulder and glance back at him as I pull the classroom door open, in complete silence.

The hallways are lined with students too strange to bother going outside on such an unusually sunny day in England. The usual book-heads are sitting on the floors or heading to the library, some of the older years are hanging around their lockers in groups, eating stolen food from behind their PE kits while others are trying to chat up girls as they head outside in entourages of two or three. Most of the kids, however, are making their way into the playgrounds, which seems like the best place for me to contemplate my strange encounter. After all, if I do not find some familiar faces out there, I might be able to retire to a quiet corner or bench and actually work through what feelings are surging through my hormonal blood at the moment.

And the playground is alive with people, the sun beating down on them and lighting up the beautiful pastel-coloured, knee-length dresses that the girls stride around in. Some of the boys in their Teddy Boy altered uniforms or Rocker leather jackets even look good with the sun-kissed glow hovering around them.