#but I say 'mom' and 'dad' for simplicity

[jessicas-pi]

if I had a nickel for every time I came up with an oc x oc ship that was a girl with Nightsister heritage who had a Nightsister mom and a psychometric Jedi dad, and a young awkward Jedi boy with a Jedi dad and a Mandalorian mom and an older sister who teases him mercilessly about his crush on said Nightsister girl, I would have two nickels. Which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice.

[chuunai]

Henlo I have something to add to the 100 followers event if that’s cool

Dazai with scenario 2 and prompt 16. Idk how these things traditionally go but…. Your stuff seems good so far and I’m excited to see what you do with this

Thank you thank you, Anon. Also sorry for how long this took everyone I swear I’m combing through the requests 3_3

✧˚ · . dad first, detective second - dazai osamu

who would’ve imagined the demon prodigy having a hellion of his own?

summary ⋆ ★ comfort, fluff, established relationship (marriage with reader), SFW → baby baby baby, Dazai really likes your boobs, etc.

It’s a perfect night, really.

Your warm body resting against his, limbs lazily tossed over each other as you snuggled and acted like lovesick fools. Moonlight poured in from the cracks of the curtains, casting small slivers on your face. Dazai couldn’t help but think of an angel when it came to you. A heavenly being that granted him a new life and forgave him for his past.

Nudging at your cheek with his nose, his voice came out in a sleepy tone.

“You should sleep, [name].”

His hand reached up to cup your face, playfully using his thumbs to gently close your eyelids like one would do with a body. He’d seen many people in the Mafia do that—try and make the deaths they caused seem more peaceful rather than a brutal end. Dazai himself never did that. No need in beautifying a simple concept of its finality and simplicity.

“Can’t. I know she’s about to wake up. It’s nearly eleven, and we put her to sleep at seven. I can tell.”

You shook your head stubbornly, looking at the baby monitor nearby where static noise and the occasional mix of a tiny snore and coo came from.

His little hellion.

Really, he had no clue how he got so lucky. First with the fact that he impregnated you and you carried his baby. Second with the fact that he had his own family now. And third with the fact she looked so much like him. Thick brown curls of hair on her head, big curious eyes that looked at him so adoringly. The tiny freckles and birthmarks scattered across her skin. She had some of your features, yes, but they were more subtle than his features.

Coupled with the fact that she was a bundle of energy and sass like him.

“I insist, pretty. Shinju needs her daddy too.”

He knew how much she made you tired with her habit for refusing to nap for more than an hour or two coupled with breastfeeding and the general responsibility and time that being a mom took. Dazai wanted to spend time with his daughter too and relieve your stress. You’d get sleep, he’d get to see Shinju. Win-win, in all accounts.

Hell, he even gave you puppy eyes in the darkness of your room.

“I…fine. But don’t wake me up if you screw up.”

Dramatically, he sighed and frowned, placing a hand on his heart.

“Does my ‘bella really think I’m an incompetent father? How heartbreaking and cruel of her!”

Much to his relief, you playfully groaned, pinching his sides lightly.

“I didn’t say that, dummy. God, I swear Shinju is more mature than you.”

Jesus, you were so insulting tonight. How was the baby that tried to put anything she could in her mouth more mature than him? Sure, he was a bit funny and childish, but he wasn’t a baby. Well, if he had his face buried in your boobs he’d be a baby. Still, it’s not his fault that they’re just so big and warm and squishy and seem to beg for his attention.

Which is what he soon did, resting his head on your chest while cupping them softly. You were wearing one of his shirts and a nursing bra underneath. He wished you weren’t wearing anything at all, but it wasn’t fair to ask for that when you recently gave birth just a mere two months ago. His libido lowered itself only for you. And when you did have sex—quickies when Shinju would nap—, he was so much nicer and loving than usual. The mother of his child didn’t deserve rough mean sex, no, she deserved gentle treatment under the sheets of their futon.

You deserved everything that he could possibly give you.

So when the small baby demon eventually began to wake up and whimper, he pressed a kiss onto your cheek and slowly got up, whistling a small tune under his breath before waking to the makeshift nursery nearby.

Opening the door slowly, he made his way to the crib and picked up his sniffling newborn, shushing her comfortingly.

“Shhh, it’s okay. Daddy’s here. We don’t want to wake up mama, okay?”

Her tiny hands balled up into fists, weakly moving around and occasionally hitting his chest. Sitting down on the rocking chair nearby, he fumbled around for one of her stuffed animals, grabbing the familiar bunny as he placed it in her arms.

“Look there, Shinju. It’s your bunny!”

From an authoritative Mafia executive to a tired loving father. Lord, Chuuya would be laughing his ass off. Or have that stupid face of confusion while he’d berate Dazai with questions about what unlucky woman had to bear his spawn. But what could that short alcoholic of a ginger say? No woman wanted to birth his babies.

He was quickly snapped out of his thoughts when Shinju’s tiny fingers began to grab at his chest, thinking he could feed her too. He could, just not straight from the source unlike you. Standing up, he went over to the mini-fridge nearby which contained bottles of your milk. It wasn’t too chilly, and so he carried it and the cooing baby to the kitchen where he warmed it up in the microwave.

After it warmed up, he carefully began to feed her, leaning back against the counter as he did so.

It still felt so odd to him. Caring and loving someone he helped to create. His self from ten years ago would never believe it—that they’d find love and even have a baby after escaping the Mafia. He had you to thank for that. The one who picked up the discarded pieces of his soul and welded it into the man he is today—a father first, and a detective second.

Kinda rushed the end but I couldn’t think of anything more :(

Tags: @twst-om-lover, @sinfulthoughtsposts, @xxcandlelightxx

[tammyjackson50-blog]

Sam is sleeping at your place tonight \\ S.M

Summary : It was another one of those days where your boyfriend stayed over for the night. But what happens when instead of sleeping, something else happens?

// kisses, touching a bit, a bit of 18+ stuff , both of you are 18 or 19...

(I totally forgot that Sam is literally 16 in the movie 🙃)

next part ->

-------------

The soft glow of the TV illuminated the room, casting shadows across the walls as you and Sam lay on your bed, cuddling.

Your leg draped over his.

Sam got hooked by the show, but you were focusing at his face,

admiring the contours and features you knew so well.

His natural beauty, without makeup, had a unique charm for you.

In the quiet of the night, surrounded by one another's warmth, It was the simplicity of being together that gave you joy.

"You look beautiful without makeup, Sammy" you whispered softly, your words barely audible over the sound of the TV.

Sam turned to you, a hint of surprise in his eyes, followed by a warm smile that reached all the way to his eyes "Thanks, babe" he said.

"I also love your profile side" you said, running your finger along Sam's jawline.

He tilted his head slightly, the soft glow of the TV drawing attention to his features.

"Really?" he asked, his tone slightly shy.

With a soft smile on your lips, you nodded. "Yes, without a doubt" You replied, appreciation clearly visible in your look, "It's just as beautiful as the front view"

A mixture of passion and affection colored Sam's face who felt grateful for your compliments.

"What's going on right now, baby?" He laughs, taken aback by your surprising compliment, you chuckle at his confusion,"Just feeling extra appreciative of your beauty tonight, that's all" you say, your tone light and affectionate.

Sam's laughter fills the room, the sound echoing with warmth and happiness "Well, I'm not complaining" he said as he pulling you closer for a hug.

You meet Sam's gaze, feeling a flutter of excitement in your chest as he looks down at you, his eyes linger on your lips, and when he asks, "Y/N? Can I kiss you?" your heart skips a beat, you nod, a soft smile spreading across your lips, your eyes locking with his, "you don't need to ask" you whisper, closing the distance between your lips in a sweet, tender kiss.

Suddenly you hear a knock on the door, causing you both to sit up fast like you did nothing "Yes?" You said, "Kids, can you turn the TV down a little?" "I'm going to bed" your mom said.

You exchange a quick glance with Sam, a smile playing on your lips as you both try not to laugh. “Sure, Mom” you call out, trying to sound casual despite the lingering heat of the moment. "Good night!" Sam adds, his voice filled with amusement.

As the sound of your mother's footsteps fade away, you both break out into quiet laughter, the interruption only adding to the sweetness of the moment.

"Let's go to sleep, I need to help my dad tomorrow with the house, you know." You nod understandingly, "But..." he continues, a hint of frustration seeping into his voice, "I really would like to kiss you again" you meet his gaze with a soft smile "Of course you would" you joked, your heart skipping a beat at the thought of another tender moment shared between you two.

With a gentle sigh, Sam leans in, pressing a lingering kiss to your lips before reluctantly pulling away, "Why are you disappointed like it's the end of the world" you laughed "well.." he adjusts his sweatpants "Not now..."

You watch as Sam adjusts his sweatpants, a mix of desire and frustration evident in his movements.

His words trail off, leaving the suggestion hanging in the air.

You meet his gaze, "Maybe we can steal a few moments" you suggest, a playful smile tugging at your lips.

Sam's eyes light up at your suggestion, a mischievous grin spreading across his face. "Yeah?" he murmurs, the excitement evident in his voice.

Without waiting for a response, he closes the distance between you, his lips capturing yours in a passionate kiss.

Time seems to stand still as you lose yourselves in each other, the world outside your bedroom fading away.

As the kiss deepens, a wave of desire washes over you, igniting a fiery passion between you and Sam.

His hands roam gently over your body, tracing every curve that sends shivers down your spine, your fingers tangle in his hair, pulling him closer as you lose yourself in the intoxicating heat of the moment. Time seems to stand still as you explore each other with a fervent hunger, your bodies moving in perfect harmony.

As you reluctantly break the kiss, a breathless chuckle escapes your lips. "We should stop," you say softly, though your own desire still burns brightly.

Sam looks at you with a mix of longing and uncertainty, his eyes searching yours for reassurance. "Are you sure?" he asks, his voice husky with desire as he leans in to kiss you again.

Despite the tempting pull of his lips, you gently place a hand on his chest, meeting his gaze with a smile. "Yeah, I'm sure," you reply, your voice filled with affection. "We have all the time in the world for this Sam" With a final lingering kiss, you both reluctantly pull away,

" You can't do this to me right now " he said, joking leaning in to kiss your neck, you laugh softly at Sam's playful protest, feeling a rush of warmth as he leans in to kiss your neck.

His lips against your skin send a shiver down your spine, and you tilt your head back, savoring the sensation. "You're the one who started it" you tease, a smile playing on your lips as his kisses trail along your neck.

Despite the temptation, you gently push him away with a playful pout. "But seriously, let's save the rest for other time" you say, Sam chuckles, pressing a final kiss to your lips before settling back beside you, his arm draped protectively over your waist.

"Well, you are the one who gave me those compliments" he said, making you gasp softly and turning you around in surprise as Sam's lips find yours once more.

His hands roam over your body, sending electric pulses of pleasure through your veins.

You find yourself melting into his touch, unable to resist the magnetic pull of his desire.

As he squeezes your breasts softly, a moan escapes your lips, the sensation sending waves of pleasure coursing through you.

Lost in the heat of the moment, you surrender yourself completely to the intoxicating bliss of his touch, knowing that with Sam, every moment is filled with love and desire.

you find yourself melting into his touch, unable to resist as he squeezes your breasts softly, a moan escapes your lips, the sensation sending waves of pleasure coursing through you.

As his lips continue to caress yours, the world around you fades into a blur, leaving only the two of you lost in a haze of passion and desire. His touch ignites a fiery longing within you, sending your heart racing with every gentle squeeze and tender kiss.

You find yourself craving more, your body arching towards his in a silent plea for closeness.

Feeling Sam shift his weight, you gasp softly as he settles on top of you, his gaze burning with desire as he looks down at you.

Your breath catches in your throat as his hands roam over your body, his touch sending shivers of pleasure coursing through you.

Lost in the intensity of the moment, you wrap your arms around him, pulling him closer as you lose yourself in the heat of his embrace.

"Hey" you murmur between kisses, "you're pretty good at this whole making out thing" Sam grins against your lips, his hands tracing patterns along your sides, "Well, I've had a lot of practice" he teases, his voice husky with desire.

You playfully roll your eyes "Oh, is that so? Should I be jealous?" He chuckles, leaning in to nuzzle your neck "Nah, you're the only one who gets to experience my expert kissing skills", You laugh softly, running your fingers through his hair "Lucky me" you quip, pulling him closer for another kiss.

you playfully nudge Sam with your elbow "So, tell me, Mr. Expert Kisser, what's your secret?"

Sam smirks, his eyes sparkling mischievously "Ah, well, it's all about the technique" he replies with mock seriousness.

You raise an eyebrow, "Oh really?"

Leaning in close, Sam whispers conspiratorially, "It's all in the lip action" He punctuates his words with a series of exaggerated kissing noises, causing you to burst into giggles.

"Is that so?" you tease, running your fingers along his jawline "I'll have to take notes for future reference", Sam laughs, pressing a quick kiss to your nose. "Consider it a masterclass in smooching" he says with a wink, before capturing your lips in another passionate kiss.

Sam suddenly pulls away, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "Wait a minute," he says, pretending to search his pockets, "I think I have something that'll take our makeout session to the next level."

Curious, you watch as Sam rummages around before producing a small tube of lip balm, you raise an eyebrow, unsure of what to expect, "Trust me," Sam says with a grin, uncapping the lip balm and applying it to his lips with exaggerated precision.

You can't help but laugh at the sight of him, his playful antics bringing a smile to your face. "What are you doing?" you ask, trying to stifle your giggles.

"Just adding a little extra...flavor" Sam replies with a wink, leaning in to kiss you once more.

As his lips meet yours, you can't help but taste the sweet hint of the lip balm.

You pull away from the kiss, unable to contain your laughter as you look at Sam with mock disbelief. "You are so weird, Sam," you say between giggles, shaking your head in amusement. "That's the last thing I expected from you to do."

Sam grins, his eyes sparkling with mischief as he shrugs, "Hey, I like to keep you on your toes" he says, his tone playful,

"Life's too short to be predictable."

You chuckle, reaching out to ruffle his hair affectionately. "Well, you definitely succeeded in surprising me," he lean in to capture your lips in another kiss, the taste of the lip balm adding an extra layer of sweetness to the moment.

You gently place your hands on Sam's chest, trying to suppress a laugh as you push him away gently. "No, enough, Sam," you say firmly, though the laughter still dances in your eyes "We really need to sleep."

But Sam doesn't seem to heed your words, his kisses growing more insistent, you can't help but giggle as his persistence, even as you try to maintain some semblance of seriousness.

"Sam, seriously" you protest, though the smile on your lips betrays your amusement, "We have to get up early tomorrow" Sam finally relents, though a mischievous twinkle remains in his eyes.

"Okay okay" he says with a grin, rolling over to his side of the bed, "But no promises about tomorrow night."

You laugh softly, shaking your head in fond exasperation as you settle back into the bed beside him.

With a final kiss goodnight, you both drift off to sleep.

Should I make part two? ;)

Edit:

Even though no one asked, I'm still going to try to make a second part to this, lol.

[kohakhearts]

goh parentified child syndrome. go(h)

my time is here at last. thank you for enabling me <3 apologies for taking months to finish writing this giant post!

welcome to my dissertation on this fucking Dynamic <3

ok! first thing, let's establish our criteria for Parentified Child Syndrome. this is obviously not like, an actual diagnostic Thing, but there are a million and one articles out there for us to look through. so i did the tough work of scouring those to find some Symptoms we can use as anchor points here. a lot of this is split into "emotional" (parents seeking comfort from their children, rather than comforting them) vs. "material" (parents assigning their children responsibilities that are not age-appropriate (e.g. grocery shopping, paying bills, etc.)) needs, but for simplicity i'll just merge them together - because realistically, they often go hand-in-hand. so the primary symptoms we'll work with here will be:

disruptive childhood behaviours (particularly at school)

stress and anxiety

reluctance to participate in play/age-appropriate activities with their peers

difficulty acknowledging and accepting one's feelings

insecure attachment styles

need to feel "in control"

distrustful of others/self-reliant to a fault

absenteeism and poor performance in school

passive communication style

the other obvious prerequesite here is the family dynamic. so let's dissect that one a bit!

goh's family situation isn't actually like...100% clear. but i have analyzed every episode where his family is even mentioned like it's my full-time job and i have no reason to believe his grandmother actually lives with him. so in the scope of this essay, i am assuming that she lives nearby, and most likely has a key to the apartment, but does not live with them.

otherwise, we are given enough context to assume that camille and walker have been busy with work goh's entire life (though i'd choose to believe for my own sanity that in his infancy his mother at least wasn't working...though given the type of job she has, that's actually...kinda hard to say for sure). we can also assume that they've at least been self-employed for the majority of his life. it's clear that they are fairly well-established in the city/in their field by jn, and since goh is supposed to be 10 at this point, it makes sense to me that they've been building that company up pretty much his whole life.

in terms of the work they do, goh tells ash, my dad is a system engineer and my mom is a programmer. they run a company together. granted, we don't see very much of their actual workplace, but what we do see is completely void of other people. as in, camille and walker do all this work BY THEMSELVES.

nothing in the anime otherwise disputes this! if anything, goh's explanations of his parents' lifestyle just reinforces it. he also suggests that during periods of harsh weather and heavy system use, his parents are busier than usual. this implies that they are most busy during holidays. this is actually further implied by the flashback in jn015 where they explicitly say to him that they're sorry for having to work through the holiday. his reaction, being completely unengaged, not even really even acknowledging it, tells us that this is the norm.

however!! he also shows off a special device to horace in jn032 that he says his parents made specifically for him, to help him learn more about mew. this suggests that they must have some amount of free time to dedicate to him...but they show their love for him through material gifts related to their line of work (his computer set-up, too; he tells scorbunny that his parents set it all up for him).

otherwise, we see camille and walker privately share their concerns about goh (a clear awareness that he doesn't have many friends, concern about him being lonely because of them, etc.) but never actually confront goh with their concerns or appear to go out of their ways to do anything about it. i wrote a bit about this and the symbolism of having him catch a cubone of all pokemon in the episode we're introduced to his family here but the tl;dr is that camille and walker demonstrate care for goh to each other but not to him - presumably to compensate for their physical absence, we get the impression he's given a lot of freedom and little to no discipline.

which brings me to the first criterion:

disruptive childhood behaviours (with a side of absenteeism, which presumably contributes to poor performance in school)

goh's school life is obviously inconvienent to the plot progression, so for narrative purposes the writers have him just not go to school. in jn049 we get the explanation that goh had made a promise to their teacher to show up to school for tests...but the weird thing about this scene is that chloe's surprised by it:

since in jn001 and jn002 we see that chloe is goh's only point of contact amongst his schoolmates and that she hand delivers schoolwork to him at her dad's lab, the only way this exchange really makes sense to me is if it's a new arrangement. even the fact that goh makes a point of saying "hey, i followed through, go me" to their teacher here gives that vibe.

so, we can extrapolate from that that...prior to whenever this agreement was made, goh just didn't go to school because he didn't want to. but given how schools operate, we can pretty safely assume his parents are aware of this. and i have strong reason to believe that they have at least been on the receiving end of phone calls from teachers or administrators, because of these lines from jn015:

all things considered, this is a weird assumption to make, especially about your hyper-independent introverted child...unless there's a history of disruptive or unfriendly behaviour to inform that assumption. and based on goh's behaviour in jn001 at professor oak's pokemon camp, i don't think it's so out there to say the pattern probably was there.

goh is actually a super sweet kid towards his parents and has a clear admiration for them both. even in flashbacks, his whole thing is kind of like...he doesn't want to bother them. they fall asleep on family vacation and don't spend time with him? well, that's fine! he'll just find something else to do! in that same episode in the flashback sequence, they pick him up on the side of the road alone in the pouring rain and he doesn't say a word to them. even though he was angry and upset before.

so, yeah. i think it would make a lot of sense if he were well-behaved at home and not so much so at school. but camille and walker, even when they learn about things that happen, don't seem to probe or discipline him. whether because of any combination of giving him leeway out of guilt or of not wanting to encourage him to act out at home, we don't know. but the disconnect obviously exists.

which then contributes to

stress and anxiety, difficulty acknowleding and accepting one's feelings, and passive communication style

goh is socially awkward, yes, and clearly very anxious socially especially early on in jn, but a lot of that seems to come from an inability to express his wants and needs. i think jn003 has some of the most succinct examples of this - ash having to realize he's struggling and to reach down to him when they're climbing the tower in order for him to even accept that he can get (and needs) help getting up, and then later one when he stumbles over his words trying to ask ash to be his friend.

i think another good example is in jn007, after he gets knocked out at the flute cup. passive communication relies a lot on shifts in body language and in, well, passive statements. when ash approaches him to tell him to cheer up, goh doesn't actually really...respond to that. he does this

and then runs off. which he does fairly often, actually, even as late as jn135. it's emotional avoidance 101. literally just run away from the thing that's bothering you. something else we see in jn135 is him backing out of admitting he wants to go on a journey - because he is concerned about ash's reaction (though i think it's a little more complex than that, but i'll circle back to that).

and of course there's jn062, which i wrote a lot about in this post. but the whole thesis of the episode is that goh has learned through his relationships up to this point that it's okay to not understand your feelings but you still have to feel them. and it's actually a really beautiful character development moment for him, but also reinforces the fact that he still doesn't know how to grapple with his own emotions. after finally finding drizzile and explaining how he knew he would find it there, he starts to cry and doesn't know why. but even aside from feeling vulnerable, it's kind of a culmination of this stress he's been carrying with him throughout the whole episode...and the sense of responsibility he feels for driving drizzile away. which is a great segue into

insecure attachment styles and need to feel "in control"

if there's one thing i feel like people sleep on regarding goh's character, it's how much of a mother hen he is. he's obviously very thorough and thoughtful when it comes to looking after his pokemon - as in jn062 where he spends all that time chasing down drizzile after it runs away, even to the point of telling ash and chloe that they should stay behind because it's getting late but that he's going to keep looking - but he's the same way with ash.

off the top of my head, things like buying extra scones because he knew ash would want them, making ash wash his hands after eating ice cream, chastising him about punctuality, you know...very parental kind of things. he actually does it with horace too, when they first meet, by bringing a lunch for them both when he goes back to the forest to meet him again.

anyway, being a Mom Friend is cute and all, but it also REEKS of parentified child. taking on responsibilities that aren't yours to fulfill? yeah. that's a need to feel in control. it's what he's used to! it offers him security!

the other side of this is...chloe. goh's first friend, who he refuses to consider a friend, or let consider him a friend. but, like, she obviously IS his friend. and yet our introduction to them gives us this exchange

goh and chloe have a pretty tense relationship at the beginning of jn, wherein she is clearly trying to help him (by you know. getting his homework for him and shit) and he blows her off in a text message, which she complains is a repeating behaviour. chloe is obviously very loyal to him, even though he doesn't seem to repay the favour. again, there's a big disconnect here.

insecure attachments generally stem from anxiety over potential rejection and/or poor self-esteem cultivated in childhood based on parents’ emotional availability (or lack thereof) to their children. by keeping chloe an arm's distance away, goh keeps himself safe from the dangers of vulnerability, taught to him through childhood encounters with emotionally unavailable parents.

i'm not here to armchair diagnose (ok, who am i kidding, yeah i am), but i think goh's attachment style is anxious-avoidant. his clear avoidance of making friends, the multiple times we see him break off his friendship with ash only to minutes later be like "me and the bestie"...yeah, that's avoidance. but he does crave intimacy, arguably even more than he fears it.

hence why even though he knows ash would want him to journey on his own...he still convinces himself that actually telling ash that would be, as he calls it, a "betrayal of [their] friendship." my theory is that he's not concerned that ash will be upset - he's concerned that ash won't be upset enough. which is why when then ash turns it around on him and says he's going on a journey, goh gets upset and pushes him away. he does the exact same thing with horace when they're younger. just a complete 180 - he wronged me once, so he's the worst and i can't forgive him, ever.

the difference with chloe is that she actually takes care of him more than he takes care of her - which changes the dynamic from "i have to do everything to keep this person in my life, including suppressing my emotions for their sake" to "i cannot express to this person that i have needs and desires because they'll think i'm too much and they won't stick around if i do." which is primarily avoidant, but insecure attachment nonetheless.

this is extrapolation, but i think his relationship with chloe is so different because we are supposed to get the sense that they have a more familial dynamic. so, she's the one person he can't push away from him - but as he learned in his actual family dynamic, he also can't be too close to her. he doesn't want to be smothered; he doesn't want her to feel smothered by him. so they maintain a degree of separation that only begins to go away after her father begins literally housing and feeding him, thus integrating him and ash into their family in some honorary way.

which brings me to the last point, i guess, which is

reluctance to participate in age-appropriate activities with peers and self-reliant to a fault

these are, i think, the traits that jn is most blatantly attempting to better in goh throughout his arc. so i won't spend too long hashing it out, because i think these are things we all know he struggled with!

in flashbacks, we see him alone at school; during the first episode, at professor oak's camp, he is always physically distanced from the other kids and chloe even points out that he's basically doing professor oak's job at one point! he's not on the same level as the other kids and it's clear he doesn't want to be. when he meets horace, we see that it takes him some time to get comfortable enough with him to go explore the forest together and become friends.

he doesn't go to school, but that doesn't mean he isn't learning things - he becomes a very self-directed learner early on, from what he see. he's not just like...rotting in his room playing video games. he's studying and researching. the only times aside from with horace that we see him in a flashback doing something that isn't solitary is with pokemon - and even then, he's like...reciting their pokedex entries. his abra story at the end of jn is precipitated by him saying he was going through his dad's old pokedex (which is a whole other thing - this implies walker used to be a trainer, but neither of goh's parents seem to have pokemon...perhaps they're too busy with work to look after them? a theory for another time, i suppose, but it has undeniably being gnawing at my brain since that episode aired lol).

and of course, there's the fact that in jn062 he tells drizzile he was never comfortable with confiding in his parents or his grandmother...suggesting that he never confided in anyone, because we don't really get the sense from the whole "i don't NEED friends" exchange in jn001 that he considers chloe a reliable confidant, either.

the other place we see his flawed sense of self-reliance, aside from like...everywhere in the first 10 or so episodes, lol (something that is reflected pretty beautifully and symbolically in scorbunny's story, too!), is in project mew. he has to learn how to work in a team - and he clearly hates it. at this point he's found one person to rely on, but that already feels like too much. the raid battle with articuno is the most obvious example of this. he isn't good at being a leader, but he also isn't good at being a follower. because he's only ever been responsible for himself, and he doesn't trust anyone else to know how to direct him, but he also has no clue how to work within the parameters of a team.

i also want to say, as a final note, that i actually think this is all extremely intentional writing. obviously in the west we have a strong capitalism culture too, but the work culture in japan is very toxic (just google "japan work culture" and you can see right away how intense it is lol) and i'm not actually surprised at all that pokemon would make such a direct commentary on that - a lot of japanese kids could probably relate to goh and his emotionally absent, work-obsessed parents! they are clearly pretty well-off, but their dedication to work supercedes matters of home and family, because that's how it's supposed to be. as a result, goh admires them a lot for this dedication - but his arc is primarily about letting go of the "work" part of interacting with pokemon and learning how to have fun and make the most of his experiences. and i think that's a really lovely message for modern pokemon to be sending to kids :')

[sugar-omi]

bro that teen pregnancy shit fucked me upppp 😭 I fr am in tears and rolling around my bed lol

my brain went on a tangent halfway thru the moms section I was like damn okay what if mc and cove just ran away huh then what

AND THEN I remembered they’ve already ran away before which is part of why mom is so worried about cove’s influence and hellooooo???? full circle moment 🫢 made myself gasp fr

ya u make me think so many thoughts on this one good lordddd

-🗑️

LOL AWW I DIDN'T THINK EVERYONE WOULD GET SO EMOTIONAL </3 AND LMAOOO I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU THOUGHT ABT RUNNING AWAY AGAIN, PLEASE IS THIS GONNA BE A TRADITION LOL anyway, well good morning!!!! here's more angst n food for thought🤭🤭

tags : Angst / Hurt/Comfort, headcanons, fem/afab reader, pregnancy

[part 1: "everyone finding out cove and MC got engaged because they're pregnant"]

his whole world stops. his ears feel like they've been stuffed with cotton and his world is spinning outta control.

now lets assume the rubber broke, just for, simplicity n lore sake.

it's not that he wasn't already worried about this happening, he had been worrying about this for weeks since you realized what happened.

but even then, he already had the fear of god in him about this happening. both because his mom and dad were on him about safe sex, but also because he has a lot of feelings about being an accident n child to teen parents... and he really didn't want to recreate that situation or put feelings like that onto another life, another human with complex emotions and many many thoughts. a human and life he's responsible for.

it shocks him so much, because he's very worried about repeating of his childhood on his child, and his kid feeling the same way he did/does.

he already knows that either way, the babe will probably have mixed feelings on being a accident, and essentially being a bump in road of his young parents lives

but it's also everything he had been worrying about, finally coming to fruition.

even though he's very, very stressed and scared for your futures, he's long since decided to make it work. he really wants to make it work. he wants to do the best by you, and the babe. and he wants to give his kid what he didn't have.

but anyway...

you're very worried about dropping the news on him

and i bought you aren't surprised at how pale cove gets when you drop the news...

and if he's not sitting down already, he is now. (he might just faint, like forreal this time too from the looks of it...)

he's very emotional, and super nervous, but what scares you is that he's very quiet...

when he does speak though, his first question is "what're.. what are you gonna do?"

because before he gets too emotional, he wants to know what you want first. you're carrying the baby and you're the one who'd go through all the changes, and you're the one who has the most intense feelings and being pregnant makes your emotions n hormones even crazier and more intensified.

all that plus how young you two are? and all the plans you two had? yeah, it's a lot, and regardless of how he feels, he wants to do whatever you want and he'd understand if you decide not to keep it.

but if you say right then and there, you wanna keep it, cove says he'll take care of you, and the babe, comforts you and hugs you. then he says wants to get married..

or if you say you dont know... cove says you two will work through these emotions, and that no matter what, he'll take care of you, and the baby if you want it.

when you do eventually say you want to keep it, even if you say this a couple minutes after, or a few days after, cove comforts you again and promises you'll work through this, and that it'll be okay.

then he brings up getting married...

of course it's more emotional, and maybe even a bit romantic!

so imagine this, you're sitting on your bed, and you and cove are hugging each other, you're wrapped up in his arms and it's a great comfort.

you're both really emotional, and calming down after crying and having a moment.

cove pulls away, takes your hands in his and even with glassy, red eyes he has a determined expression. goes on about how much he loves you, and how much he treasures you, and that he's going to do his best for you, and take care of everything.

his speech probably draws you back to tears, even brings him to tears but he keeps going because he needs to tell you all this!!

"y/n... i want to marry you, i want us to be a family.. i know i don't have a ring and this isn't very romantic but.. will you marry me?"

doesn't matter if you say yes right away or if you ask him if he's sure he wants to get married, he reassures you he's not just doing this because he thinks it is what you and/or your or his family would want.

he wants to marry you anyway, why wait?

now about telling your parents.

regardless of if you have cove there while you tell them, or you do it alone, lets say cove finds out what your mom said about him being a bad influence.

i also think your moms are a bit icy with cove too, so even if he has to force out all the details of your conversation, he already knows your moms aren't happy

but to know your mom thought, maybe even thinks so still especially with the news, that he was/is a bad influence on you.

it makes him sad. because what if she, or even both your parents, thinks that cove is dragging your life down with marriage and a baby?

well, like i said in the first post, this totally opens up a new can of insecurities and doubts, and he kinda spirals into his own mind.

he even starts thinking about what if you regret marrying him, and/or having his baby. what if you decide you hate being a parent, or being married, or being a family all together?

what if this holds you back so much that you start to resent him. god he's so afraid of you resenting him.

and your moms being short with him doesn't make him feel better because now he just had a thought, what if your family hates him so much that they start talking to you about how much of a mess this is, and then you realize how they're right, and decide to leave him, or even worse, leave him and the baby?

it's all very irrational thoughts, and when he wakes up (after maybe 3 hours sleep), he realizes it is a bit.. ridiculous. just a bit. he knows you wouldn't abandon him so easily, and you certainly wouldn't be swayed by your family

but he also wouldn't blame you if you had, or have (now or in the future), any resentments. he just really wants it to work.

i think this is also the time when he realizes exactly how much his parents divorce fucked him up.

he very determined for you two to make it work as a family. not co-parents.

he wants to see his kid every day, he wants to see you everyday, he wants to celebrate every milestone as a family and he definitely doesn't want to fight with you like his parents did. and even more so doesn't want to make your kid hear or see all of it.

he doesn't wanna fight, and then you or him walk out for hours or days. doesn't wanna sleep in separate rooms, doesn't wanna sleep by the crib to comfort himself with the presence of his darling baby, or because you two fought, like his dad used to.

doesn't wanna have to explain why mommy* and daddy are fighting, or why they don't sleep in the same room, or why they aren't talking to each other, or why they aren't living together anymore.

definitely doesn't want to explain what divorce is and what that means for them.

(*just saying mommy for simplicity sake)

but he also doesn't want to repeat what his dad did, and take on all the burden by himself.

it's hard to find a balance too, because he's torn between working his ass off to provide and prove that he can do it, that you aren't making a mistake... and accepting help, or letting himself relax sometimes.

but i think wanting to be there for you during the pregnancy, forces him to leave his days more open.

of course he still works more than usual, but he also makes sure to carve out time to see you, and be there to comfort you or bring you food, flowers, or go on a date.

remember i mentioned therapy in the last post?

please encourage him to start it. because this is a very big transition in your lives, and you both want the best for yourselves and the baby, so lets do the work before they get here, okay?

fighting with his dad

now he definitely appreciates his parents concern, and their support and words of wisdom, all that stuff...

but when his dad says something like "you don't want to end up like me and your mom." or "you shouldn't mess up your future." or even if he insistently tells cove, "think about your future! y/n's future!"

cove gets upset, just because does that mean his dad is projecting onto him, and telling him that they're fucking up just like he and mom did? or is he telling him that he's dragging your future and his into the mud?

either way, that's what makes him say something mean, just like i said in the last post:

cove would probably end up saying something (a bit) hurtful like "i would never end up like you and mom." , "i would never marry MC if i didn't know it'd work. unlike some people, i'm not gonna make my kid listen to us argue and then try to play happy family." , or "trust me, my kid won't end up with a childhood like mine." / "trust me, my marriage won't end up like yours."

he definitely hangs up the call or walks away from his dad immediately afterward, shaking with anger and anxiety. he's so stressed. and he's worked up.

after the argument, there's only 2 places cove could go at this moment. to you, or to work.

and if he's at work, he's distracted, but tries to focus on his job. he's still mad at his dad, and he already feels like crying. he really didn't need his dad to doubt him.

he gets it. he gets it, he really really does. but he feels so fragile, that he'd really appreciate a little faith.

now if he's with you, which he'd probably run to you after work anyway just so he doesn't have to face his dad yet. he's like a big baby

he's holding you, arms around your waist and his head on your stomach or lap, or you're laying on your side and he has his hand on your belly, as if he's waiting for the baby to reach for his hand through your tummy.

when he tells you what happened, and why he's so somber, please run your fingers through his hair and just listen to him for a bit... eventually he'll start rambling about all the things he's been holding onto, including his fears about you resenting him

it'll probably be a long talk, but once you reassure him that you wanna make it work too, and that you know cove will be a good dad (and vice versa), and that your moms don't hate him, they're just... upset. and worked up about the turn of events.

and you talk about his dad too, and the argument, you both realize it comes from a place of concern.

he doesn't wanna see you two try to be a family and fail. he doesn't want you to make mistakes he did while raising cove...

conclusion, it's a very fruitful conversation. and cove goes back home, teary eyed and a bit like a lost puppy, and that night he doesn't find his dad waiting for him (cliff tries to work as late as possible, both because he wanted to give cove some space, but also because he has a bad habit of avoiding situations... so when he does get home, he spends the night in his room)

of course they can't avoid each other forever, and the next day cove actually makes the effort to find his dad during his lunch break to apologize.

he said something really hurtful, that i don't think cove could live with if he didn't apologize.

his dad definitely laughs when cove mentions that you said that cove should try therapy, and even if you don't say that his dad should consider it too, cove does say to his dad that a family therapist sounds like a good idea.

[therapycat21]

All Right Now Part 10

Travis Kelce x Famous!Reader Description: The reader catches the eye of famous footballer Travis.

Warnings: None

Social Media AU

It has officially been a year we have been together and engaged for two months. And It’s been absolutely amazing. Travis and I have been talking and trying to jot down ideas for the wedding and trying to get a head start so It can be easier for us later on.

Everytime we sit down and scroll and try to find ideas it has been nothing but overwhelming, there is a lot that goes into a wedding. Everytime we look at places or themes all I want to do is elope somewhere with our family but I highly doubt Travis would be down for that. Since I was a teenager I always thought a big wedding was too much,

Too much time

Too much money

When all the other girls would talk about their future weddings it would be all out with the most outrageous stuff but me on the other hand, I loved simplicity, even now that I’m more known everyone expects the big and extravagant event, I mean I’m okay with a small quick ceremony and then a party that is more out there afterwards for everyone but other then that, I crave the normality and the simplicity of it, and If I’m gonna get married once in my life It needs to be exactly how we want.

“Why do you look so focused?” Travis breaks me from my thoughts from where we sit at the dining room table, I look up from where I was staring into space on my phone. I shake my head putting my phone down I sigh “It is a little overwhelming I guess, I don’t know I just think I’m overthinking it.” I tell him. 

Travis nods his head slightly “what are you overthinking?” he questions “literally everything, the venue, the guest list, the food, hell even if we do round tables or not” I snort “who said we have to do any of that?” he tells me, confused “what do you mean?” I asked him “I mean, why do we have to do any of that, who said we can’t get eloped and then have a party afterward” he smiles at me before grabbing his phone heading to the couch “just think about it” he says.

I sit at the counter a little stunned before rushing after him “Wait a second!”. All I hear is him laughing as I jog after him.

Time skip—-

“Are absolutely sure about this?” I asked apprehensive to Travis, In return all I get in response is a smile that takes over his entire face. Travis grabs my face into his hands “I’ve never been more sure about this baby” We smile at each other before Travis turns back to the open laptop resting on his legs, he taps the screen confirming the payment for the marriage license, I turn to him squealing “oh my god! I can’t believe we just did that!” I jump on him plastering his face with small kisses, laughing from excitement.

I pull away “so that means we can do it whenever we want?” I question he nods his head in agreement “Whenever we want baby” I smile in acceptance before smirking “so that even means today?” I ask he turns looking at me shocked “you would marry today?” he asks like that’s even a question.

I nod “of course I would, that’s never up for debate” I tell him, now waiting for a response. He nods his head slowly before belly laughing, grabbing me into a full bear hug and scattering kisses all over my face as I laugh. He let's go, jumping off the bed pulling me with him.

“come on, let’s go, we are getting married today, I gotta call mom, dad and Jason so they know where to meet us” he runs off into the bathroom excitedly to get ready. I laugh before turning to pick up my phone to call mom. 

The call finally connects and my moms voice greets me “so, you’re never gonna believe what’s happening today” I tell her smiling.

Time skip—-

I stare into the mirror at my reflection, I’m wearing a simple white dress from one of the many award shows I’ve gone to. The door opens and I see my mom’s head poke in with a grin “hey, how’re you feeling?” she asks fully entering the room, shutting the door behind her. I give her a shaky sigh in response “I’m so nervous, what if he changes his mind?” I asked her.

Smiling she brings me into a hug “seeing how that man looks at you and seeing how he puts you on such a high pedestal, I have no doubt in my mind that man will never change his mind about marrying you” she tells me, I can see tears starting to cloud her eyes, “Oh mama” I say pulling her tighter into the hug.

We hug for a little longer before she moves out of the embrace and slightly shakes my shoulder “Okay, let’s go, we have my son-in-law waiting probably scared to death” she laughs. I smile before giving myself a once over in the mirror and we head to the door to the ceremony doors.

My mom loops her arm through mine as the doors open and I’m greeted with the small Kelce family on one side and a few of our friends on the other. We start to walk.

I smile at the girls, Kylie and Jason before my attention is brought to the podium.

Travis wears a black suit looking absolutely amazing. I could see the tears forming in his eyes from the doors, causing me to start tearing up as we got closer to him. As I step up onto the podium with Travis’s help, I greet the officiant with a smile. Travis grasps my hands in his warm ones.

The officiant gives a brief smile to the both of us “okay, let’s do this shall we?”. I look over to Travis once more “you sure about this?” I jokingly asks he belly laughs “Oh baby, I’ve never been more ready.” I nod turning to the officiant “let’s do this”.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

Like my writing? Buy me a coffee. I would be so grateful!

Taglist:

@whitemanswhore3

@bxdbxtxh15

@cixrosie

@kkrenae

@the-untamed-soul

@calirindo

@armystay89

@hotwheels1108

@awatt31

@bobthe-turmpetman29

@goldenharrysworld

@chimchimmarie

@jmamas92

@itsdesiree86

[echobx]

the one with the letter - JJ Maybank × ex!fem!reader

summary: you have to figure out if your love for JJ is stronger than what the world throws at you

warnings: Luke..., hurt/comfort, angsty, happy ending

word count: 2k

author's note: part 3 bc I had to. it didn't feel right to let you guys hanging. and no matter how much I try to write a JJ fic that doesn't have a happy ending, it just doesn't work. he always finds a way. he's one persistent bbg.

part 1 | part 2

The two days that you are supposed to stay in bed and focus on getting better feel like a month to you.

Going back to school feels even worse. Everyone seems to have their eyes pinned on you, to the point where you find yourself hiding in the photo lab to avoid everyone and everything for just the half hour that is your lunchtime.

“Jesus, y/n!” Pope jumps and nearly drops his camera in the process. “What are you doing here?”

But yet again you aren't granted the simplicity of loneliness when you need it most.

“Hiding,” you reply, looking up at him and his sad smile.

“Why?”

“Because everyone hates me. I get it. I'd hate myself too,” you whisper, and he crouches down by your side.

“I don't hate you,” he shakes his head, and you close your eyes to focus. He should hate you. You keep on hurting his best friend. He should definitely hate you.

He places the camera on the floor next to him before sighing. “Love's messy.”

“No, that's just me,” you say, picking at your nails. “I'm the problem.”

“You're allowed to feel sad or hurt or anything,” he whispers and takes your hand in his. “I'm glad you're better. JJ was losing his mind when your mom kicked him out. And he's not much better now either. Refused to come to school because you didn't reply to his letter.”

Your head perks up, and you furrow your brows, blinking a few times. “Letter?”

“Yeah, the letter he left you at the hospital,” Pope explains, but your confused expression lets it dawn on him that you had never known about a letter.

“There's no letter. I don't have a letter,” you insist, and he runs his hand over his face.

“Shit,” he hisses silently, and you stand up, heart pounding when you reach for your bag and pull it over your shoulder.

You curse your mom on the whole way down to the Cut, and it's a long way, but you don't stop. You can't.

“I have to go,” you mumble, and even though he tries to stop you, you won't let him.

When you arrive at the Shack, you can hear them screaming, it's not unlike what you had witnessed before. But this time you don't stop and wait for it to die down a little before walking in.

“You're an ungrateful bastard!” Luke yells, but as soon as he sees you, he stops and a mean smile plays on his face. “Haven't seen that one in a while. Why are you here? He knock you up?” Luke taunts and you swallow hard.

“Don't talk about her like that,” JJ snaps at him, taking a step closer to his dad. His fists are balled and the knuckles bruised.

“Let go!” you scream from the top of your lungs, and for some reason they stop to look at you. One step forward as you glare at Luke, and he drops JJ to the floor, a shallow thump tells you that his head hit the wood not so softly. But you can't drag your eyes off Luke, if you do, he wins.

“She's a bitch just like her mama,” Luke spits and JJ lunges forward, but he's pushed back instantly. You try to focus on your breathing to not lose yourself in the pain that is flooding your body as you watch him get hurt.

“You don't get to tell me what to do in my own house, Missy,” he glares, but you take another step closer, your eye twitching.

“I'm not afraid of you,” you hiss, and he scoffs, but you don't give him enough time to come up with a comment. “You're nothing but a drunk, child beating asshole. You don't deserve him. And it's baffling to me how someone like you was capable of fucking up so massively, but he still turned out better than anyone I've ever met. And I know I don't deserve him either, but at least I don't make him feel like shit just for being born.”

It feels like a million tons are lifted off your chest when you hear the screen door hit against the wood and the engine of his truck start and drive off.

Luke swallows, looking down at JJ. “If she's not gone by the time I get back, you can look for a new home, boy.”

“You shouldn't have done that,” JJ shakes his head as you turn to him. He has a cut on his lip and his right eye is starting to slowly swell up.

“You're hurt,” you whisper and reach up to touch his cheek, but he turns away.

“Why are you here? Wanna rip my heart out a third time?” There's resentment in his voice, but you get stuck on his counting. What was the second time?

“I came to ask something. Something important,” you whisper, but it has escaped your mind. The condition he is in feels worse to you than before. It's like a repetitive gut punch paired with slaps to your face, but your pain wasn't physical, it was all in your head.

“Can I please take care of you?” you beg, and he swallows but nods.

You clean his cuts and softly press the cold, wet washcloth to his eye. Although you haven't patched him up in months, it feels like no time has passed since the last time.

The bathroom is a mess, just like the whole house, but you don't care, you never did. It makes sense to you. It was one of the reasons why JJ had always felt more at home at your home than his own. It was the reason, why you rather stayed at the Château together than at his or at yours, where you'd always run the risk of your mom kicking him out.

“Thank you,” JJ whispers and takes the washcloth from your hand to hold onto it by himself.

“Why did you say I was going to break your heart a third time?” you ask tentatively, sitting down on the closed toilet opposite of him, while his hand clasps around the edge of the tub he's sitting on.

“I didn't wanna make you feel worse about it. It wasn't my choice to make. And it was too late already, so it didn't matter. But it hurt, it still hurts,” he mumbles without looking at you. “I keep having this nightmare- it's not really a nightmare, I guess. But when I wake up, I feel worse, and I wish the dream was real instead of my actual life.”

“What happens in your dream?” you whisper.

“You never leave me, we- we have the kid, and it's not easy, but it's happy. It feels warm and it doesn't hurt. And then I wake up, and it's just painful. It hurts so much, y/n.”

“I'm sorry,” you apologize, but you know it's not enough. You know it won't undo all the pain you caused him.

“And now you're here to tell me what? That I need to move on? Find someone better?” JJ's eyes find yours, and it feels like getting stabbed while someone keeps twisting the knife.

“So you talk to him but not me?”

“Pope said you wrote me a letter,” you start, and he rolls his eyes.

“JJ, listen to me,” you grab his face with both of your hands, forcing him to look at you. “I never got it. I was alone, and she said she told you to leave, and then you didn't text me. I thought you wanted nothing to do with me after that night, that's why I didn't text you either. But I don't know about any letter. I mean, I didn't even know it existed before Pope found me in the photo lab and told me, and then I ran here immediately. I'm sorry.” You take a deep breath, and he searches your face, and for once you're not even lying to yourself anymore.

“I was scared is all, that's why I wrote it,” he shrugs his shoulders, and you drop your hands down to your thighs.

“What did it say?”

“That I wish I could turn back time and make you feel more loved than I did. That I hate seeing you smile at that jerk. That I- That I don't want to ever lose you again. You scared me so much, and I don't know why you ran after him, and then you fell, and I wasn't fast enough, I couldn't stop your fall. And I felt like I lost you for good, forever, and John B drove like a maniac, and it wasn't fast enough. And then they didn't let me stay with you at first, and I had to sit there while they did all those tests, and they didn't tell me shit. I wanted to stay, wait until you woke up but- Your mom said it was my fault, and I believed her. Because it's always my fault. So I wrote it down, how much I do love you but that it's not gonna work because it can't be, she's right. And I asked her to give it to you. I promised to stay away if she would just give you the letter. Because I couldn't- I thought you were dead, and I was ready to end it too, if it meant I could be with you. I know that's stupid, but that's how I felt. And now you know, and you can leave, because you should leave. I'm not good for you, I never was, and you knew that, that's why you left me,” he finishes his venting, but you have no words left in you. There was nothing you could say that would make it better because words were not enough to encompass how you feel.

“What are you doing?” JJ whispers against your lips, but you kiss him again. And he kisses you back, cautiously slow.

You lean forward, brushing the palm of your hand over his cheek before holding onto it and placing a soft kiss on his lips. He tastes like beer and blood, a weird mix, but a familiar one at that.

“I'm not gonna leave ever again, I promise,” you whisper, and he looks into your eyes, pain and anxiety still prevalent in his own.

“Are you sure?” he asks, brushing through your hair with his free hand.

“Positive. We can get our own place, just you and me. Maybe that'll make it easier,” you smile and he nods. “I'm very sorry for what I did,” you apologize again.

“I made Kie write those notes. She didn't want to. Said you don't deserve it after all,” he mumbles. “They don't know about- You know…”

“I didn't tell anyone either,” you admit and he nods.

“Yeah, but he deserves it,” you press your face into his chest. His bed, his arms, all of it makes you feel more alive than anything you had done the past months.

“You stood up to my dad,” JJ chuckles. “That was incredibly stupid, you know that, right?”

“You really don't think you deserve me? You know I'm nothing but a weed smoking delinquent, right?”

“Who said that?” you pull away to look at him.

“Guess,” he snorts, and you furrow your brows in anger.

“I hate her. That's the only thing he was right about. She is a bitch,” you exhale the anger over your own mother.

“What'ya think happened between them two?” JJ wonders and you sigh.

“My mom being my mom, and Luke being Luke…, I'm guessing nothing pretty.”

“I love you, y/n. And I don't think I'll ever stop, no matter how hard it gets,” JJ whispers and kisses the top of your head.

“It's gonna be pretty hard, knowing you,” you giggle, and he fakes a gasp.

“I see how it is. First, you steal my heart, then my jokes.”

“I learned from the best,” you grin at him and he kisses you. It feels like the very first time. Exciting and with millions of butterflies in your stomach, and at the same time it's a forever kiss. It's a promise that you won't break, because you finally understand that you can't be without him.

“I love you, too, J,” you hush against his lips, and he smiles into another kiss.

please don't copy and/or post my work onto other platforms! ~e©ho

taglist: @ijustwantttoread @spideysimpossiblegirl @redhead1180 @princessmaybank @kys4-20 @drwstarkeyy @immyowndefender @julczimozart

[nitronine]

AITA for abandoning my “son” who killed my brother?

I (22 M) spent two years teaching myself the intricacies of life itself and created a being of my own creation. For simplicity, lets call him my son (2 M). When I made him I was fucked up mentally. In a really bad place. Still not over my mom dying not to long before that. And as soon as he came to life I went into a weird state where I didn’t leave my bed for months and had to switch majors (chemistry reminded me too much of the whole making a monster thing). While I was having this episode the monster kinda wandered off I guess (I kinda wanted him to leave anyways LOL). Anyways. Two years pass after that and I get a letter from my dad saying my brother was brutally murdered. So I come home immediately and find out that my surrogate sister is in trial for it (can I ever catch a fucking break!). Of course I know it was my creature that did this (I caught a glimpse of him on my trip over) but I can’t just TELL people that they’d think I’m CRAZY! So there wasn’t anything I could do and they execute my surrogate sister. of course I’m devastated, I basically indirectly murdered people, so I go on a walk to clear my head. And I run into my creature!!! And he gives me this sob story about me abandoning him when he had no knowledge of the world and how whenever he tries to be a good person people attack him cause he’s an ugly freak. He also admitted to killing my brother and framing my surrogate sister. And now he wants me to make ANOTHER creature for him to marry!!!! He claims it’s the only way someone will love him or something. Of course I refused!!!!! But he keeps pushing it! Personally I think I was in the right for abandoning him if he was gonna turn out like this but I wanna be sure. AITA?

[theultimatekamehamehavoc]

Byakuya's Mom?

I find her fascinating with her non-existent ways cus, depending how one interprets Byakuya's backstory, she can be vastly different! Perhaps his mother is still around in his life as a duo with Kijo, maybe the two having a sorta connection despite Togami's not allowing to be wed cus screw the rules. They wanna live their Disney Villain fantasies. Or, maybe the two are still together but not, Byakuya's mom simply being another cog in the Togami Conglomerate's machine in which both Kijo and her just ignore each other's existence. Maybe, instead of that, Byakuya's mom just had a business like contractual obligation to birth Byakuya, either via the sex or with Kijo being the sperm doner. Then, she simply gave birth and fucked off, either staying in whatever country she's at or booking it somewhere else around the world after being paid off by Kijo. Perhaps, she's living a cozy life as a botanist. Furthermore, another interpretation, one I've actually seen a bit in fics is Byakuya's mom somewhat being in his life for about a couple years just to raise him before he went of with Kijo. Depending on the interpretation, she can be an actually sweet person who may actually miss Byakuya when he eventually is gone, maybe not teaching him too much of anything but at least introduces him to the piano (maybe the violin too). Or, maybe, instead of being nice, she honestly couldn't care less of a shit about Byakuya. It's also interesting seeing these different Momma Togami and how Byakuya feels about here. Or well, not really Momma Togami cus she's not a Togami but there is literally no information on this woman anyway. For all we know, Byakuya could have just been born in a lab with how he never talks about her in canon. Hell! Byakuya could have 2 dads and we'd never know. For the sake of simplicity though, I'll still blab about his hypothetical mother. Which, depending on the interpretation can depend on if 1. Byakuya even remembers her 2. If he has fond memories of her 3. If he even cared to any extent about her and who she is 4. If he gained anything from being in her care. It's safe to say that he didn't really care with his motive video but again, it's really fascinating thinking about this hypothetical character and how little they matter, how mysterious they kinda are, and the interpretations that can be brought from the fact that, for the most part, someone had to give birth to make Byakuya Togami be born. Additionally, cus I dunno how to squeeze this in... ALSO LIGHT SPOILER LANGUAGE HERE! it's also a bit interesting imagining the hypothetical of his mom living somehow after the tragedy. After all, the Togami's fell but it never said that anyone who is tied to them but not a Togami themself died. So, Byakuya's half siblings (or some of them) could still be alive along side his hypothetical mother. That's about it though! Hope this was an interesting ramble! Stuff like this fascinates me and, as someone who really likes Byakuya, many readings on his backstory, character, and family is just really neat!

[cacartoon]

Ok I had to write this out before I forgot because I was rewatching the Octonauts episode where Calico Jack is in the Amazon and it’s super cute and sweet and I almost cry every time Kwazii and Jack have their sweet grandfather and grandson moment and something just went off in my head.

Calico Jack, legendary pirate, is the grandfather of Kwazii.

GRANDFATHER

This means that sometime in the past, Calico Jack had a family. He met someone, had a child of his own, then that child had Kwazii.

Now what I think would be a fun headcanon idea is this: Who were Kwazii’s parents?

Basically explaining and theorizing who was the child of Calico Jack (aka this child would be Kwazii’s mom or dad) and what exactly happened to them.

Because it’s funny to think about how close Calico Jack and Kwazii are in the Octonauts universe #bestgrandpagrandsonbond and yet neither of them talk about that one generation of their family that separates them. Not once to my knowledge did Calico Jack ask about Kwazii’s parents and Kwazii never brings them up or even asks Calico Jack about them.

So, who are they? Where are they now? Why don’t Kwazii and Calico Jack talk about them?

My personal thought/ headcanon is this:

Many years ago before the Octonauts and the Amazon Adventure; there was a young swashbuckling pirate cat who sailed the seas. His name was Calico Jack. He had begun to get quite the name for himself among other pirates that sailed the sea. One day, when he was at port gathering supplies for his next great pirate adventure, he met someone. It was another cat who was working at the port. Calico Jack was amazed by the beauty of this cat. This cat would help other sailors and pirates with their supplies while hearing the epic tales of treasure hunts and battles on the open water. Calico Jack decided to share his own tales of adventures one day and his fantastical tales left this lady in awe. She asked more about his pirate adventures and soon the two began to form a bond. She’d wait at the docks for Jack, ready to hear more stories and talk before he set sail once again. Soon, the two cats fell in love. (Whether they married or not isn’t too important but for simplicity I’ll say they did) Eventually Calico Jack invited the girl to join him on his adventures and she happily agreed, ready to sail by his side as they hunted down treasures.

As time passed the two lived happily, and now had a new member part of their pirate crew. (I don’t think it matters too much whether he had a son or a daughter so I’ll keep it neutral). Calico Jack was very happy. He had a beautiful lass, a wonder kid, and the entire world to explore with them. As they traveled, Calico Jack taught his kid all the pirate ways of life. His child was very invested in their father’s tales of monsters and treasure and loved the pirate lessons, but as they grew up they began to drift away from pirate life. Not long after so did the lady Calico Jack loved. She wanted to truly settle down and spend her life with her family. Calico Jack, wanting to make his family happy, helped them get settled in a place where they could spend their lives together. While his family was happy and content with this, Calico Jack still longed for the sea and continued his adventures. He always made sure to return home for some time and told his family of his adventures. While not the most ideal, it made him happy and his lady only wanted him to be happy.

Time passed and soon Calico Jack’s kid grew up and found someone of their own. Not long after, Kwazii was born. Calico Jack was thrilled by his first grandchild and enjoyed being a grandpa. He began adventuring less to stay back and be there for his family. He would help out with baby Kwazii and would tell him stories as well about the pirate adventures he’d have. Kwazii loved these stories and the pirate life. As Kwazii grew, Calico Jack kept little treasures of his family adventurer and was reminded of his love for adventures. He longed for his pirate days again. He also wanted Kwazii to be proud of the pirate he was made out to be, and there was one treasure he hadn’t found that he was sure Kwazii would love; the Hidden City. One one of his adventures Calico Jack found half of a medallion that had a map to this hidden city. While of course he couldn’t take a literal kitten on a dangerous adventure to the Amazon, he wanted to find the city and tell Kwazii all about it. So with a final goodbye, Calico Jack sailed off with his parrot Pete to find the city. Unfortunately, the rainy season caused this adventure to turn sour, and Calico Jack was stranded in the Amazon.

Time passed and Calico Jack was presumed to be lost forever. This hurt Calico Jack’s lady and child very much; they were not happy with him leaving like that and now he was gone. But a little Kwazii was barely old enough to remember his grandfather, and he began to miss him. Seeing how much he cared for his grandpa, Calico Jack’s child would continue to tell the tales of their father and kept the pirate spirit alive within Kwazii.

Time passed on. Calico Jack’s lady and child were long gone (whether they eventually moved away or passed is up to interpretation) and a grown Kwazii held onto the stories and faded memory of his lost grandfather. Kwazii had his own pirate adventures, wanting to be just like his grandpa, and eventually would join the Octonauts. Now Kwazii has great sea adventures all the time. In the Amazon, Calico Jack fought to survive. He wanted to find the hidden city, but more importantly he wanted to see his family. He knew what mattered more than treasure in the moment, was that we stayed alive so he could see his family again. And fate would be on his side as his only grandchild would find the other half of the medallion and would help him find the hidden city, allowing Calico Jack’s mission to be complete and for his adventures to continue. Only now, he has the grandson he loved dearly.

Of course Calico Jack would’ve learned his lady and child were gone (again up to interpretation how) and was very disheartened. But having Kwazii definitely was a moment of happiness and he never let that love go. Now Kwazii and Calico Jack travel to world together and have adventures while checking islands in case any disappeared.

Ok ima go to bed now

[factual-fantasy]

YOOO 26 ASKS?? :000

I'd like to think the fight still happens but its different. Maybe Seam tried to intervene but quickly collapsed of exhaustion? Or maybe he was conked out from the start and never saw it happen? Its all possible..

Its very possible to find other lost Grillby's and Goner Kids,, etc.. but for simplicity's sake I'll say that they haven't found them <XD

As for how they see each other, Jevil cares a lot about the others. Goner kid is kind'a low-key like his adopted daughter?? A little?? <XD Seam is his best friend of course- His relationship with Grillby is rough.. but he feels very sympathetic towards Grillby and doesn't think poorly of him. Spamton is also meant to be his good friend, second to Seam. His view of Asgore is laced with a liiiiitle bit of unease becuase of his whole royalty vibe. But Asgore has proven that he is 100% trustworthy so they pals :}} I haven't thought much about his relationship with River person.. I kind'a keep forgetting that she exists <XDD --

Seam is on good terms with basically everyone. Jevil is his best friend. Him and Grillby are a little rocky.. but just like Jevil, Seam is very sympathetic towards Grillby and has no hard feelings. Spamton is a good friend of Seams and so is River person I think. Asgore's royal vibe is off putting but overall he's a great guy and they have a good friendship. Goner kid is basically Seams niece XD

Grillby kind'a feels off about everyone- his feelings towards Jevil are pretty messed up at the moment.. and by extension he doesn't get along great with Seam.. Spamton is nice, but is endlessly supportive and grateful towards Jevil so any potential friendship between them is already strained.. Goner kid reminds him too much of his late daughter so he tends to avoid her.. Now River Person and Asgore? They're wonderful. He's very close with both of them and they are the only things keeping him sane right now- River Person is incredibly gentle and soft spoken. She's really sweet and relates to Grillby's pain. They usually have quiet chats away from the group and it really helps Grillby feel better. Same for Asgore. It started with that 1 hug. Having Asgore's support has really changed the game for Grillby. River Person and Asgore are true friends of his and he doesn't know where he'd be without them <:}}

Spamton is mostly chill with everyone. His close friends would be Jevil and Seam. And Goner kid would be fun to play/mess around with. She's a good little kid. He would also consider Asgore and River Person to be his friends, although he isn't as close with them as he is with Jevil. Grillby is a tough person to approach <XD --

Goner Kid is most connected to Jevil and Seam, with Asgore being a close 3rd. Jevil is kind'a taking the role of dad in a way. Having been the one that saved her and gave her a new name. Seam is the soft uncle and Asgore is dad #2 XDD Spamton is like a fun big brother and River Person kiiind'a has mom vibes?? She's really nice. She's not really sure about Grillby..

Asgore is like the groups body guard/emotional support goat. His personality is so soft and caring that everyone gravitated to him in some way. He built genuine relationships with everyone in the group and is a good friend. He's just the best I guess XDD

I haven't planned out that much for River person.. other than her being close with Grillby and Asgore I haven't planned too much. Maybe she gets along well with Seam? Someone with a gentle sing songy voice must be relaxing for Seam to listen to.

As for the empty AU's due to bad sans'? Personally? I really don't like all those crazy sans AU's. So they don't exist in mine. If there's an empty AU its not because of a sans-

@elegysonnet

<XD Poor Seam-

And yeah no- no romantic implications- I still see what you mean. Jevil caring for Seam so much and doing everything in his power to protect and provide for him. It very well could remind Grillby of his wife. When he had a rough day at the bar he would come home to a meal on the table and a caring wife to listen to him groan about his day.

And say Seam did collapse and Jevil was worried sick. Showing how much he cares about Seam. It might just make Grillby mad. He lost everyone that ever cared about him. And its all Jevil's "fault".. That thought would be enough to set anyone off-

Also thank you so much!! :DDD

I haven't thought much about exactly how King removed Seams eye. But he very well could have restrained him with the chains. Maybe then he gouged out his eye with the weird spade tongue stomach- thing?? That he has??

Awww can you imagine? The trauma that is associated with those chains. Seeing them and being reminded of that experience every single day.. and he cant get away from those memories, because no one can remove them.. 🥺🥺

Poor guy cant even scream without causing immense pain..

He has tried to help Seam. He's tried to break the chains, but for some reason he cant even scratch them. He's tried to heal Seam to bring his strength back.. But he cant. Seam's soul just straight up rejects/cant absorb his healing magic.

The best he can really do for Seam is protect him. Seam is basically defenseless because he cant use his magic without wiping out his energy..

And he feels horrible for Seam. And Jevil.. Hearing about how they were abused by a wicked King. It makes him sick. A king is meant to protect his people, not hurt them. He vows to protect and care for his new friends, and to hopefully find someone who can break these chains..

@minophilia

Ah Transformers: Prime. The show that I stopped watching when I was less than 10 episodes away from the finale <XD

@funkymonkeyzz

I hate to break it to ya, but I kiiind'a low-key despise Paani. :x I don't think I'll be drawing him anytime soon-

As for Tracker, He'd probably look just like Barnacles but less muscle, more fluff <XD

@boxofcreampuffs

My Spamton looked just like any other addison. But with glasses, and his hair could have been black by default perhaps.? I might have to draw him sometime :0

As for main character interactions. I've thought about the group witnessing Kris and the gang in a battle. In which they see Ralsei heal the others.. They promptly ambush the group and beg Ralsei to heal Seam and Spamton. Ralsei, being the absolute sweet heart that he is, agrees to help. But it doesn't really work out the way they'd hoped..

I also thought about Seam being collapsed in the snow somewhere while Jevil goes to search for food. While he's gone. Either a Frisk or the soul of kindness finds him.. 👀👀

In the Partial swap, I'm thinking that the only characters that switched places was Freddy with Bonnie, and Chica with Foxy. I'm going back on my idea to have Roxy switch places with Monty..

In the TRUE swap. Its Freddy - Bonnie, Chica - Foxy, Monty - Roxy, DJMM - DA, and Gregory - Vanessa.

Also thank you! :}}

Yes! :0

@wolfie-777

Absolute. utter. chaos. XDD No one would be sane-

In the Partial swap, with Gregory as the kid.. its Foxy. Although much like the classic AU, the band is kind'a split..

Bonnie is a grumpy recluse and so is Roxy. Monty and Foxy are pals though. They're also friends with DA and DJMM and keep regular contact. Foxy is the main one that always tries to keep the spirits up and keep the group together. But there's not much he can really do..

In the true swap, with Vanessa as the kid.. It would probably still be Foxy <XD

Its possible..? But I never really planned for him to meet anyone like that-

@tiredlilmiracle

I've never heard of it actually, Google says its a game? :0

I'm not sure what you mean.. You mean like, what do all their attacks look like?

If so, most of Jevils attacks are like the ones he has in the base game. Although my Jevil might prefer to use his scythe most of the time.

As for Seam I imagined a lot of sewing related attacks. Sewing needles with thread attached that connects to his soul being 1.

There's actually a comic here on Tumblr called "Paper Trail" that shows a Seam battle sequence! It was made by lynxgriffin and that battle scene might give you a good idea of what my Seams attacks could look like! I highly recommend the comic :00

If you mean how powerful? I don't really have a good measurement or character to compare them to.. But I do know that Jevil and Seam are equally matched. If they both fought each other at their strongest, neither would win. They would just exhaust themselves and collapse <XD

@mashmellowy

Nopenopenopenope sorry nuh uh nope nopenope-

@ocinstituterep

I think they share a pod because they're the highest authority on the ship. Captain and Lieutenant. Makes sense why'd they bunk in the same pod.

I can also see that. :0 Maybe after a rough mission or just a long day.. I can see Kwazii popping in to check and make sure the Captains alright 🥺

@djadecutie

I don't think the skelebros have any special immunity because Grillby is made of magical/monster fire. Maybe regular fire the bros bodies react differently to.? But If they were in Jevil's place, Grillbys hand would've chopped away at their health just as badly and as fast as it did Jevil's..

For different monsters having different depletion speeds? Its possible. It could be that most monsters are all effected the same except for a select few cases. I think it also depends on the monsters strength. Like-

If Grillby tried to burn an Asgore. It might not effect him as badly due to him having his own kind of fire magic. Plus he's really strong. Or if Grillby tried to burn another fire person, I imagine he can still hurt them.. but not as badly as he could if they were a different species. It's not just Grillby burning you with fire- it's Grillby using his soul/magic to try and hurt you on purpose.

If Grillby tried to burn Undyne or Papyrus? Well that would just be a slam dunk. They don't have any fire related powers or any physical attributes that could help them. So they just get burned. I hope this made sense-

Also thank you!! :DDD

He does, but its not much bigger than Freddy or Monty's.

I imagined that although Bonnie is bigger than the others, his torso is full of a lot more electronic components and parts. Which would make his actual stomach hatch space kind'a cramped.. If not smaller than Freddy's and Monty's.

@beryl-shade

He cant fly no. Nor was his speed really increased much I imagine. But he very well could be more flexible and move more freely than before :0

@milk-powrit (Post in question)

They're pretty stinkin tough. But Waluigi standing with an arrow through his ankle doesn't mean he's superman. Just means that he's probably high on adrenaline and more focused on helping the weird tiny green man then on the pain in his leg.

WAAA THANK YOU SO MUCH!!😭😭💗🍤💗

And honestly thats exactly how I feel. I'm so tired of the constant shipping everywhere that I just banned it from all my AUs and fanart <XD

And wow, I'm surprised by the number of people that have told me that XDD You guys just happen to be into all the stuff I'M into I'd say XD

@citrusfruitman

Personally I remember not liking it.. but watching Markiplier play it was fun :}

I've actually played a bit of hat in time! I even have three posts about it that I can recall! :00

Post one, two and three! :}

[bitchinbarzal]

Last Christmas | M.Barzal

this is my entry for @antoineroussel christmas fic exchange!

this is for you, @lhugh! happy holidays annie 🎄🤍

this fic does use they/them pronouns as they are annie’s pronouns! 🫶🏼

word count: 2,461 words

-

Last Christmas, you walked into December planning every festive activity possible; the Rockefeller Christmas tree, Nutcracker at New York City ballet, Radio City Rockettes even letting Mat show you up at skating.

That was until Mat dropped the break up bomb on you. You couldn’t really comprehend it all, too confused and hurt at once.

You were supposed to spend Christmas with Mat and the team at the Martin’s. You never answered Sydney’s texts after the breakup.

You spent Christmas alone.

You were thankful the islanders tanked their 21/22 season. It meant that they all left to go home as soon as possible.

That meant no islanders, no jerseys, no chants on the train home from work.

No Mat.

He went home to Coquitlam two days after the islanders lost to Tampa.

Mat spent his first summer in seven years bouncing around from place to place. He was out on the lake with Tyson for a few weeks and he visited Anthony and Emma when they bought their new home in Quebec.

He wasn’t home long with his family until he got a call, from Brock. His dad had died.

He asked if you and Mat could attend the funeral, his father really adored you both in the time he’d met you and he knew Mat well. Mathew agreed to attend, claiming you were busy but sent your well wishes.

He flew into Minnesota the day prior, dropping off flowers to Brock’s mom and she welcomed him into her home giving him a drink and thanking him for coming.

“He always liked watching you play, unless you played against Vancouver of course” she laughed, Mat gave her a smile “It’s a shame y/n couldn’t come”

“Yeah, it’s a shame” he mumbled.

Next he saw her was at the funeral, listening while she stood talking about her husband, the love she had for him, how much she missed him already.

All Mat could think about when he heard her words were you.

You were his best friend.

You were the person who knew him best.

You were supposed to be around forever.

When Mat got home after that trip he didn’t do much, he was no longer in the mood to go out partying, celebrating with friends.

Mat returned to Long Island in the end of August.

He frequented the coffee shop you guys often did and he even walked the route in the morning you did. He didn’t see you.

It wasn’t until week 3 of attending the same coffee shop that the barista, Logan said to him

“Mat, they don’t come in here anymore I’m sorry. Said they needed a fresh start after the breakup”

He silently nodded to the girl, hoping she hadn’t caught his face falling. He simply took his flat white from the counter and exited to building.

Contract talks started in mid-september.

The organization called in May to the office to discuss; throwing around money and perks.

He took the time to digest the information. He called him mom and dad to see what their opinions were on the whole thing, called his financial advisor and even called Anders but the number he kept hovering over belonged to you.

Everyone’s advice was along the lines of “you need to see yourself settling down in Long Island with a contract term like that” and he did, with you.

The deal was signed on October 4th.

@ny_islanders: “I love It here” says Mathew Barzal, after signing his 8 year extension to stay here in Long Island 💙🤍🧡

You read the tweet, saw the posts and the stories from your mutual friends. You wanted to text him — tell him congratulations, but you couldn’t bring yourself to do it.

So instead, you simply put an orange heart emoji under the islanders post about his extension and scrolled on.

Mat saw it. His heart soared at the simplicity of it but yet the fact he knew you were still thinking of him, that you in some way still cared.

Late October, the leaves were starting to fall and hockey was beginning again. Mat wasn’t playing his best — missing goals, easy passes and a lot of falling over.

People started doubting him; calling him a fake, a money grabber and claiming they wished Lou hadn’t even drafted his extension papers.

Mat started to doubt himself too.

was he good enough?

should he have signed the papers?

was he worth the money?

was Long Island better off without him? were you?

There is was! The real problem.

Ever since that last December his mind had been stuck on you and really it shouldn’t have because it was his fault, he broke up with you.

If anyone asked Mat why you broke up he would say “We just wanted different things”

If Mat was honest with himself he would say “I was scared I wasn’t enough for them”

The first few months of hockey came and passed with not a single goal from Mat.

Lambert pulled him aside one morning at practice to tell him “You better get your head out of your ass son because one more game the way you’ve been going and you’ll be benched for the rest of this year”

The last game in November, against Philadelphia Mat was a healthy scratch.

His punishment was over by the next game but Lane told him in no specific terms he had to step up. Mat just groaned and mumbled a “Yeah, I’m fucking trying” before leaving the office.

It was harder now that it was December.

In summer he could just pretend things weren’t different.

You weren’t at his families house? You had to be with your mom.

He was alone at the casino event? You had work.

But Christmas, that was different. Christmas wasn’t something he could sweep under the rug and pretend you were busy.

You’d spent every Christmas together since Mat was eighteen years old. Your first Christmas in New York was an overwhelming experience and Mat thought it adorable at how excited you were about everything.

He bought you a necklace that year. It had his number on it, the gold chain necklace held the number thirteen on your chest and you never took it off.

It was a staple piece in your collection, whenever someone at one of your fancy work dinners or meetings would ask

“Hey why does your necklace have the thirteen on it?”

You would smile so bright, in such adoration and reply “My boyfriend, mat. He plays hockey for the New York Islanders and he’s number thirteen! but always number one to me” and everyone would laugh and call you cute.

You’d left that necklace behind the night you’d packed your stuff up to leave. Mat found it when he returned home from Boston on an away game to find you’d obviously been in and cleared out your belongings too while he was gone.

He took the necklace and posted it to your mom’s house, the only address connected to you he knew. He never knew if you’d gotten it back, not that it mattered much anyway because why would you want to wear it after you’d broken up?

Mat’s no goal streak continued up to the last game before Christmas, December 23rd and he was goal-less.

He was so frustrated at everything he couldn’t think straight about getting this goal. He was spending Christmas alone for the second year in a row — alone, without you.

He couldn’t stop thinking about you no matter how hard he tried. How you’d been here tonight wearing a silly Christmas jumper and cheering about the last game before Christmas.

They tanked the first period, Tkachuk got away with the puck leaving them up one by the end of the first. There were so many penalties, stupid penalties. It was a mess.

Second period, they equalised in the first few minutes with a goal from Beau before Brock got them up another which was matched not long after by Florida.

When the third period hit it was like something went off in Mat, that he had a surge of energy.

He got a goal, his first season goal! Then another and another with only a few seconds left on the clock.

Hat-trick. He got a hatty.

He’d done it. He finally scored a goal this season, they won the game and he got a hat-trick!

So why didn’t he feel like it was enough?

When he got back to the locker room, Mat pulled his phone out of his bag and looked at his notifications; texts from friends and family congratulating him on the goals, random emails but it was as though he was searching for something.

He clicked through the phone until he landed on what he wanted and pressed it before holding the phone up to his ear.

It rang twice before it connected

“Hello?”

“Um, hey! This is weird and I’m not sure why I’m doing this but I felt like I had to because, well because I scored my first goal of the season tonight. I scored my first season goal and I got a hatty too which I mean is a lot but I don’t feel like it’s enough”

Mat sighed, completely blocking out his team-mates listening to this conversation and looking on with sympathy

“It’s not enough because I know you’re not here-“

“-Mat-“

“No, please let me finish it’s taken me long enough to get the courage to call you. I was stupid for what I did last Christmas and I will wholeheartedly tell you that this year has been the worst year of my life and maybe you call that karma, I call it a wake up call that you… you’re the love of my life and that I want to be with you, I was scared and stupid but I’m better I will be better for you! I’m ready to be the man you need”

After his spiel, Mat took a deep breath awaiting your answer but instead was met with a dead line.

You hung up on him.

Mat looked dejectedly at him phone in hand before he got up to get dressed as he was very spitefully aware of the media and press awaiting him outside the door.

He breezed through media by giving them one word answers and a bored look, they usually let him away early when he did that.

Collecting his bag from the now empty locker room and sulking down the hallway towards the car park.

He wasn’t even looking up, instead opted for the wonderful view of his scuffed shoes. Paying so little attention he didn’t even see you standing at the end of the hallway.

“Nice shot!” His head whipped up, locking eyes with you almost immediately.

You watched his face go through a multitude of emotions before it softened and he muttered “What-“

“I was here Mat” is what you said, gesturing to the stairs you’d descended from your seat “I was sat up there and I watched it, I was cheering you on”

Mat was speechless, fumbling over his words and his eyes flickered across your body, trying to drink you in while you were stood in front of him before his eyes landed on your neck.

Lay on your black shirt was a necklace, the necklace.

The number thirteen lay to elegantly on your chest “You got it”

You looked down and smiled “Oh yeah, my mom sent it to my apartment” playing with it between your thumb and pointer finger.

A soft silence settled between you both, it wasn’t weird or awkward — it could never be awkward between you and Mat.

Until Mat broke the silence by asking

“Why are you here?”

You smiled gently “The islanders last game before Christmas has always been my tradition since I moved to New York you know that and so I never changed it this year, despite the circumstances” the last bit was a little snappy and he knew that.

“I meant what i said on that call by the way” you nodded curtly as a reply before holding out your hand for him to take

“How about you drive us around that neighbourhood with the good Christmas lights and we can talk, in the car eh?”

The Christmas lights, another tradition between you both.

Mat reached out, clasping his hand in yours and nodding “Yeah, let’s do that”

The lights on peoples home’s had somehow gotten better this year and you admired them all in a childlike fashion from the passenger seat of Mathew’s Range Rover.

“This is one of my favourite traditions we started” you say, still looking out the window. Your hand rested now on the console in the middle of the car.

Mat slipped his hand into yours, taking a leap of faith which paid off when you clasped it in yours and squeezed it.

“Yeah, i love it” he muttered, pulling the car into the side of the road now you’d reached the end of the street.

You turned to him now, waiting for him to say something.

“Listen, this is all really weird and I wish I was better with words because I would like to be able to tell you the million and one ways in which I absolutely adore you and regret what I did last Christmas every single day. However, what I can do is promise you, I promise you that I will work everyday to prove to you how much I love you and how sorry I am — I ruined Christmas and I think that’s what hurts the most is that I tainted something you love so much-“

You cut him off then, your hands resting on his cheeks; forcing him to look at you and you said “Christmas is not ruined, Christmas has brought me back to the boy I love with my whole heart and being. Don’t you ever think that you ruined Christmas because sure it wasn’t fun last year but we will have a million more Christmas’ to make up for it”

He nodded, head moving slightly so he could press a kiss onto your palm “I’ll make every Christmas the most special just for you”

“As long as I’ve got you, baby any Christmas is special”

On Christmas, when Mat arrived late to the Lee’s for Christmas with the team he walked in smiling

“Sorry, sorry I’m late I had to pick something up!”

“Dude it’s Christmas Day where could you possibly have gone to pick-“ Anthony cut himself off when he saw you enter the house, gifts stacked up in your arms that you placed on the table next to the door before grabbing Mat’s outreached hand.

“Oh my god, it’s a Christmas miracle!”

[siblingskissing]

vance hcs pleeeeease 🤲

Vance Hopper Headcanons

-Momma's boyMomma's boyMomma's boyMomma's boyMomma's boyMomma's boy -Vance has anger issues that I believe are both trauma based and also possibly an undiagnosed disorder/mental health issue. It was the 70s so he likely wouldn't have been diagnosed but you see what I mean -He's not rich but he's also not dirt poor either. I imagine his dad probably has a really nice job and forced his mom to be a housewife/caregiver 24/7. That being said- Vance has a pretty humble mindset when it comes to finances despite the fact -When Vance went missing he was out walking after a fight with his old man- likely had some bruising already when the Grabber tried coaxing him into helping him. I feel like Vance probably didn't try to help but rather tried to fight him and that's how he grabbed him

- (I'm not gonna go into my headcanons for his captivity in this post but I will happily do a separate post if yall want that)

-Vance hates sweets but sour candy has a grip on his soul -He also loves salty foods

-His style is inspired by both his own need to rebel but also his mom's style when she was younger. I think she had hair similar to this:

-I think she actually has dark hair to and the color comes from his dad's side

-Vance actually is really smart and would do well in school if he was given the chance. however, do to both his environment and his temper he can't actually show that -He loves dogs. He prefers cats some days but he likes to feed the stray dogs that sit in the alleys -He loves bananas. Ever since he was a toddler he would munch on them. His mother once got concerned that he had a potassium issue. Nope. Just likes banana -He's allergic to kind of a lot. Cinnamon, peanuts,almonds, eggs, honestly he has a laundry list of allergens that his mom keeps handy -Thankfully most of his allergies (minus the peanuts and almonds) are mostly just irritants so he can still eat things he likes. However those two will kill him. -He likes horror films but isn't huge on them. He'll sometimes sneak into the drive in to watch them but that's more for the rush than the actual film. His favourite horror film is Halloween -I don't have a specific sexuality headcanoned for him. I guess most people would say Pansexual but i think he's unlabelled. He doesn't like many people but if he gets involved with someone? Well, good for them. -chocolate chip pancakes lover -Watches the Twilight Zone with his mom every week. His favorite episode is 'To Serve Man' - Vance always secretly wanted to be a firefighter when he got older. He thought they were cool and when he was like 5 he used to play with his mom that he was a firefighter rescuing her. - His favourite ice cream flavour is vanilla. He does not care that it's basic, he likes the simplicity and how its not too sweet. -Same reason he likes dark chocolate. -IDK why but I imagine him as an older brother?? Maybe his mom had a little girl after him or was pregnant when he went missing. -IDK but either way he is so protective. -He hates reading with a passion. He hates silence and he hates being silent the entire time he reads. He does however enjoy when people read to him/he can follow along with someone reading. -Rip vance you would've loved audiobooks -Know how I said he likes horror? He HATES horror stories. They aren't as fun for him and he things they're boring -I imagine he has a very clean room for some reason?? Like he likes things to be in their place, how he likes it and its organized for his needs -Kinda similar in the idea of this?? Like i doubt he has tons of decor but he has what he needs

-Secret art kid. He's really good at drawing but doesn't do it much outside of his room. He prefers traditional pencil drawings since paint leaves too much residue but if he gets his hands on colored pencils? He flourishes. -rip vance you would've loved alcohol markers-

[arminsumi]

FLEUR

Oneshot | Eren | ♪

Eren works as a florist at his mom's flower shop, and just next to it is his dad's clinic. After your check ups, you browse the flowers. Eren always glances over at you longingly.

But he never manages to work up the courage to talk to you, and it always gets him down.

⚠️Cws; fluff, light angst

Notes; black!fem!reader

"Ah, Eren." Armin sighed pitifully at his friend.

Eren lowered his chin onto his forearm, and let his gloomy eyes flutter closed.

"You really need to do something about this." Armin said.

You had yet again come into the store, bought a bouquet, and vanished from sight. All Eren managed to say to you were simplicities, hello how are you that will be $6.99 thank you see you again.

Eren sighed heavily and rubbed the tension out of his face with his hands. "She'll come by for another checkup at some point again; I promise to really talk to her then."

"Uh-uh! You said that last time!" Armin shook his head.

"Well, this time I really mean it."

"You also said that last time."

Eren let his head fall back and groaned. He always became lethargic at the end of a long working day, especially when this happened.

His mom descended the stairs from the upstairs apartment. She didn't need to even ask what had gotten Eren in this mood, it was all too familiar.

"Eren?" She called out, but he closed his eyes and rested his jaw heavily in his palm.

"Yeah?" He mumbled lamely.

"Get off work early for today, okay? You two go out and stretch your legs, take your mind of things." She spoke gently.

She sighed and turned to Armin after Eren was unresponsive, "Armin, take this poor boy out somewhere nice." She asked.

"Yes ma'am." Armin clapped his hands together, "Eren, let's go, come on." Armin encouraged, and tried to move Eren by his arm, but he wouldn't budge.

He let out a throaty groan, like he was in pain at the sight of embarrassing memories in his mind. There they were, projecting onto his eyelids like a movie.

At that point he was being so dramatic that it became comical.

Armin laughed, and tried to move him again, "Come on, big boy, we'll go get some food and bitch about life, how does that sound?"

He gave Eren another encouraging tug on his arm, "Come on! Move, move, soldier!" He shook him playfully.

"Alright." Eren sighed heavily, and finally moved. Though, he moved as if his whole body was made of lead.

They exited the flower shop together and headed out onto the sidewalk. The winter sun gave the street a sharp, crisp quality.

Eren had such a heavy mood all around him, so Armin tried to be funny to make him feel better. But all of Armin's work didn't pay off because Eren's gloom was stubborn.

"Wanna get some takeout?" Eren suggested lamely.

"Eren, you've had takeout every day for almost a week now." Armin looked over at him pitifully, "Let's get something good to eat, okay? My treat."

"Alright, fine then." Eren agreed.

They ambled down the street, talking while window shopping down the block.

During midday time in the city, it felt like a beehive. The incessant rumbling and buzzing of cars, the unnecessary hooting, the sighs of braking buses rolling to a standstill at the gleaming red stoplights.

Even babies were crying somewhere in the distance. It felt like New York. No, it was worse than New York. A city like this was a nightmare.

Still, it's home. And Eren felt happy to live in the same city as someone like you, even if he only ever got to see you and not talk to you.

If there were god above, then they took great pity on Eren that day, and cast a spell of luck over him and you. In this beehive rush at midday, Armin and Eren wound up at a secluded restaurant.

It was one of those restaurants that the eye easily skips over unless you're really hungry. The only reason you visited there was because your mom and grandmother ran it together.

It had been some time since you'd been to visit, though, so really... this was a truly lucky day.

The doorbell chimed, it sounded rusty, and Eren entered with Armin at his side. The latter scanned his environment with bright eyes, but his best friend didn't have even a trace of light in his gaze.

That is, until he caught a glimpse of your hair from behind.

"Armin, three o'clock." Eren whispered into his ear.

"I saw, I saw." Armin nodded, noticing you an instant after Eren did. He had a lopsided grin on his face.

You were cheerily talking to your mom, by chance, about the boy who works at the florist's down the block.

"Sounds like a match." Your mom teased, "Why not talk to him?"

You shrugged, "He doesn't seem to be interested. I mean, otherwise, wouldn't he have talked to me by now? I always visit after checkups, you know, like I said."

Eren and Armin took a seat by the window near the entrance. A soft light filled the restaurant. Each time Eren took a glance at you, he felt like he was laying eyes on an angel.

"Eren, go on." Armin encouraged, "This is prime time to introduce yourself."

Eren pursed his lips, folded his arms on the table, and shook his head slowly.

"Come on, if you don't do something, I will."

"Don't even think about it." Eren snapped.

Armin leaned back in his seat and let out a sigh. His best friend was always stubborn like this.

When your mom came around to take their orders, Armin asked her where the bathroom was. Eren didn't pay much attention, but his friend was brewing a little plan to help him out.

Very smoothly and swiftly, Armin weaved through the tables, went to the bathroom to fix his hair and practice what he would do, and then emerged confidently.

Eren looked over and saw Armin talking to you. At first he felt this confused jealousy, but then watched as you laughed and rose from your lonesome table and walked over to the table he was sat at.

It was all quick, and before Eren could stutter out a confused hello, Armin introduced the two of you.

He did it with a smirk, "This is Eren. Oh, Eren, hope you don't mind, I thought she looked lonely and might want to join us for lunch."

Armin gave Eren a wink.

Hearing your voice once more, and viewing your dark complexion in this angelic light, it had Eren's heart panging nervously in his chest.

But Armin threw jokes around, and lightened the mood, so Eren's tensed shoulders relaxed and he finally eased into the conversation.

Though, you noticed, he stuttered and spoke quietly when you asked him questions.

"Your dad runs the clinic, right?" You asked.

Eren nodded, "Uh, yeah, he does. And my mom runs the florist where I work..."

"You help your mom's florist business?" You tilted your head adoringly at him, "That's so sweet of you. I love that."

Armin pursed his lips to keep from smiling, watching as how Eren's face grew extremely red at your compliments.

"Oh, I just remembered, I've got to return that library book." Armin lied.

"What library boo – ohhh, yeah, you do that..." Eren played along.

Armin rose from his seat, "I'll be back in a bit, it's a long walk." he got to his feet.

"Alright! See you, Armin." You kindly waved goodbye.

And so he left, and left the two of you alone together in that golden light. Good conversation and subtle flirting filled the air between you and Eren.

Clearly this was the start of something good.

[aphrostarot]

Leo Man

Title: “The Natural”

For simplicity's sake, I will use the pronouns “he/him” for the male versions of the signs and “she/her” for the female versions of the signs. This is not to say that the people who identify with the male or female versions of each sign identify with those pronouns. This post is focusing on the different sexes (male vs female) not gender. Gender is fluid and I am in no way labeling people with these posts. Also, these posts are focusing solely on the Sun signs of each zodiac, other birth chart placements may cause someone to not fit into everything I have described.

Masterlist

Mind (how they think):

The Leo man is the quintessential golden boy.

He has great charisma and an innate sense of ease and entitlement.

He tends to be a real know it all. This is because he has a hard time seeing the world from any other perspective than his own.

He believes that he is the main character in everyone’s lives. So, he tends to steal the center of attention in any conversation he is in.

Like the Lion that rules his sign, injury makes him dangerous. He will usually either sulk, seeking to make the people around him as miserable as he feels, or he will succumb to one of his infamous temper tantrums.

He has a god complex in the way that he believes he has the utmost authority over everyone he encounters. He believes he is better than everyone who crosses his path.

More than any other man, he believes that his way of thinking is the ‘right’ way.

He has little respect for any authority other than his own. With the expectation of his father, who he tends to worship.

He despises formal settings and attire. This is because he needs to feel relaxed and comfortable at all times.

He isn’t interested in pleasing or impressing anyone. In his eyes, you either take him as he is or don’t take him at all.

Leo is ruled by the 5th house, which is the house of fun and games and sport and amusement. So, Leo men are usually predisposed to natural athleticism. Though, he is typically not infused with the team spirit that often comes along with sports.

He can sometimes be addicted to gaming and gambling because of that 5th house influence over him.

He is the zodiac’s ultimate father figure. This is because he never fails to be perceived as a leader, at home or in his career.

He is frequently depended on by almost everyone in his life. This image of being the one that people can depend on is an image he has carried with since childhood and is one he can have the most trouble escaping.

He tends to be pretty physically strong from a young age. This could also be mirrored in his intellectual capability.

He is clever, witty, talented, and has a strong moral fortitude.

More than most, when he fails to meet his goals, he feels guilty and disappointed in himself.

He is often set apart from the other members of his family, which causes a psychological rift to build between him and his family.

He will typically experience an intense sense of blame for outshining his siblings.

Because of this rift, he will often downplay his achievements to his family in particular. This is pretty ironic because he loves the attention he mom gives him for his accomplishments. Which then makes him believe he is a rising star in his family.

No matter how hard he tries, he will never get the same positive feedback from his father that his mother gives him.

He respects his father and holds him in such high regard, but his dad never returns those views.

His dad will frequently chastise him for “trying too hard” and so, in turn, the Leo man stops trying.

Since it is his dad’s opinion that mattered the most to him when he was a kid, he will frequently avoid his feelings of guilt when failing to fulfill his goals. Because of this, he adopts a no-effort attitude towards life, only finding success when it comes to him easily and naturally.

He goes through his life feeling wholly confident, this is an easy stance for him because he never takes risks, emotionally and otherwise.

In all of his interactions with others he’ll make little or no effort to establish a personal connection, only securing friendships that, like everything else, develop with zero strain.

He hates people who he thinks “try too hard” because in his eyes he is the guy who “has it all” and has no respect for people who wear their insecurities and hearts on their sleeves.

Whenever someone he doesn��t know shows sincere interest in him, he will tend to lie to people about his accomplishments in life, or just any detail of his life. In his eyes, he's just “pranking” them or “fibbing” and it’s no big deal. This is because he believes that these people are not worthy of his time and effort to be open and honest, especially if he expects to never see them again.

It is cliché, but the men of this sign are truly the center of attention.

Most people feel that just being in his presence makes them feel better about themselves. This is because his confidence is complete, and it inspires others to stop second-guessing themselves.

To his loved ones, the Leo man is their emotional bodyguard. He will stand up for the people he cares for. He would kick anyone's ass who he deems looked at you sideways if he truly cares for you. It’s just that he really tends to have a very small group of people he really cares for, and it is almost impossible for you to get into that small group.

Body + Soul (what they look like inside and out):

As the personification of a masculine-fixed-fire status, by the time he is an adult he already considers himself a star, regardless of profession, and as such, he doesn’t need proof in the form of universal attention on any kind of grand scale.

He knows people are drawn to him. So, he simply just selects those he deems worthy to enter his personal private sphere.

As much as he tries, the attention seems to always find him wherever he goes.

He seems so laid back and candid when you look at him, this is why people tend to gravitate towards him. It’s almost like his physique is calling you to him.

Many may mistake his openness as him having an outgoing personality, when in reality he is actually quite the introvert. This doesn’t mean that he is shy, it’s just that most people don't have anything but the vaguest of interest for him, so, he doesn’t try to get to know them.

When it comes to friendships, he is notorious for having few to none, and save for the one queen or king this manically monogamous man is forever expecting to meet, he makes no room in his life for close relationships.

He does not mind being single. In fact, he is delighted to go about his daily routine solo.

To 99 percent of the population, he will remain an untouchable, unattainable entity.

He is usually fairer skinned than other members of his family, slightly more blotchy and flushed than the rest of his family.

He may have slightly blonde or red hair, regardless of his ethnicity.

He typically has a Lion’s mane of some sort. Typically sporting thickly tousled locks, coarse or straw like in texture, with a very low hairline.

His face is often weathered; and even from a young age, his face is crinkled with what appears to be laugh lines on his cheeks, temples, and even his bushy brow.

He typically has very dry and sensitive skin, that sunburn and freckles very easily. He needs to be careful and protect himself against moles and small skin cancers caused by the harmful rays of his ruler Sun.

It is very hard to get him to even crack a smile, which is why the wrinkles and lines on his face are most definitely not laugh lines.

He is reluctant to express pleasure with even the most restricted grins. He feels these shows of favor are not easily won, so he will never hand them out easily.

He is naturally fit. Which may make him somewhat of a fatphobe, either to other people or to himself.

Cotton and wool are typically the mainstays of his wardrobe. Anything “peppy” is what he goes for.

He likes to show off his torso, so he may oftentimes wear v-necks or have his shirts unbuttoned.

He likes to look put together wherever he goes but, he typically won’t iron his clothes, he likes a more clean but crumpled look.

He is born with the pectoral muscles that most men spend their whole lives trying to get at the gym. This is why he tends to show off his chest, because it is typically well-defined.

He normally has a flat middle that is nearly impossible to chisel into a six-pack.

He is big-boned with more thick skin rather than fat.

His body is typically evenly proportioned, right down to his big hands and feet.

His “package” is similarly designed. Typically, not overly hung, but perhaps considerably thick.

He has some wild body hair, symmetrically situated and often blondish in hue, rarely, if ever, will he be extremely hairy.

In the pubic area, his hair will be sparse, wiry rather than dense, and often trailing into his butt and inner thigh region.

However, those areas of his body are rarely seen. He does not like people to see his body, so, even on the hottest of hot days, he will be wearing full-length trousers and a button down shirt.

He is easily the most modest, least promiscuous and the most pickiest of all the zodiacal men.

Sex + Sexuality (what they are like in bed and what they look for in a mate):

Leo Man Interested in Women:

When it comes to sex, nobody can hold out on “getting some” like the Leo man.

He is vigilant in his determination to “do without” until someone worthy enough comes along.

Sex for him is an empty experience if his heart isn’t in it.

He trusts his heart over his mind, and will never settle for second best.

More Leos will marry their high school sweetheart than any other zodiacal male because once he feels he finds the one he is committed.

However, if he does not end up with his high school sweetheart then you end up having a whole different type of Leo man, who is willing to work through a string of women, holding an ongoing contest for his permanent affections, putting each woman he links up with through a trial by fire, gauging her emotional capacities.

The Leo man hopes to appeal to a woman who’ll buy into his presumption of superiority, sharing in and, thus, imbuing herself with that same dominance and authority.

The Leo man will always live in the spotlight no matter how small that spotlight may be; and he, consciously or not, hopes that his “place in the sun” will lure potential lovers to him.

He wants a woman who is strong, autonomous yet fiercely loyal, and a haughty diva in public but a valuable little girl in private. Not that he wants to overpower her, but rather, he wants to please, protect, and come to her emotional rescue.

Often without even knowing it himself, he is drawn to women who lack a father's love in their life. Women who have a toughened exterior that is hiding an ultra tender, aching heart.

He will purposefully run hot and cold, testing a woman's emotional stamina.

He also has a tendency to toy with women's affections, while he has no interest in them and has no intention of investing emotionally in them.

He gets a thrill out of stringing girls along.

He is ultimately searching for his regal counterpart, he will even get bored with women who continuously make themselves ‘too’ available to him.

The Leo man looks for a woman who is deserving of him, and oftentimes it is the one who demands to be deserved by him.

He wants a woman who will deliver him an ultimatum. One that says that he can go around with all those other women, but he has to treat her like gold, or she’s gone. That is when he will finally settle down because she is the woman he has been waiting for his whole life.

He has been waiting to find the woman who has the courage to demand he be her champion and protector, considering herself worthy of the royal treatment he will offer.

Relationships are all or nothing for him. He spends most of his early life holding back, both emotionally and sexually, until he finds a love worthy of pouring himself into.

Because of this, he has a hard time letting go when he is broken up with.

He feels the need to be a father figure to women.

He isn’t looking to be adored, but rather to find himself a lover worthy to adore.

He is typically drawn to the dark woman who exudes a sultry sensuality encased within a sturdy, full-figured woman.

As I mentioned above, he can oftentimes be a fatphobe, however he still holds the curvy, hourglass, woman in the highest esteem.

He gravitates towards vivacious women who seem full of good health and vigor, perhaps by way of athletic capabilities.

Despite the fact that he ends up with a woman who demands royal treatment, he still expects her to understand that he is above her in the relationship. He is the king and she is his queen.

He is the most monogamous of most males; and he believes that even looking at other women is almost as bad as touching them.

He prides himself on loyalty, and when in an unhappy marriage he would rather grin and bear it than admit defeat. Still, even then he would never stray. He’s not one to seek sex. But he will let love find him. If his heart begins to swell for another woman, he will pack up and leave for her. And when he goes, he is gone. This is because as deeply as he loved, the loss is more profound than any love he ever felt for that person.

He has the hardest time recovering from lost love, especially when he didn’t see it coming. He will be crippled at being cast aside, that the sulking could last for years.

When it comes time to consummate the relationship, in his mind, this is a ceremonious affair.

The actual act of sex is a big deal for the Leo man, and it is a turn-off if his lover doesn’t share this heightened, somewhat dramatic perspective.

If he even gets the slightest whiff that his lover is “too seasoned” in the bedroom, he will leave her in the dust.

He is one of the most sexist of all the other men in the zodiac.

He is very vanilla. Sex to him should never be too sleazy, which is why he is rarely one to try new things.

Most often, it is the woman who must take on the driver's seat when it comes to initiating sex with this guy.

If he is feeling a bit freaky, it is most regularly a dominance role-play he will embark in. Obviously it will be his partner who is submissive because he still feels superior even in the bedroom.

However, in most cases, the Leo man does not have a kinky bone in his body.

Sex always has to be taken slow with him. And every sexual encounter should feel like the first time, or at least a special occasion.

He is not really a giver in the bedroom, however he would love to receive.

He expects sex as an everyday thing in his relationship and if the schedules don’t permit it, then he will find a day to devote to sex. Making it an all day event to make up for the lost time.

Playing with his balls, especially by running your fingernails across them, during intercourse will have him in the palm of your hand.

Other erogenous zones for him are his chest, his back, his scalp, and his neck.

Sex is something he would never boast about outside his home. Where, even there, it is something he avoids in conversation.

Leo Man Interested in Men:

The gay Leo man is typically straight passing. Because when he is young, he is slightly afraid to own his sexuality and be proud of it. So he tends to want to appear straight so no one questions him.

However, as he matures, he is more out and proud than most of his gay friends; pride itself is a more prominent virtue for the gay Leo man than it will ever be for the straight one.

Looking ‘straight’ also serves another purpose for him; it attracts female friends, who usually make up the greater part of his adoring fan base.

Regardless of sexual orientation, the Leo man needs to know he appeals to a pride of women.

Most of his male friends are straight, and, they too, are subject to his dominion, being typically wimpier in the presence of the Leo man.

He will put his straight friends' dates through the same sort of trials by fire the straight Leo man puts his prospective mates does.

His friends are forbidden to express any opinion about his choice of lover, though it will be very tempting for his friend circle to do so.

He tends to seek out the streety, even tricky types whose character might be, if not suspect, then at least wholly out of sync with his own.

While the straight Leo wants a ready-made queen, the gay Leo seems to enjoy slumming it in search of some “lost” male orphan whom he can adopt and have benefit from his natural fatherly energy.

He typically goes for younger guys, however, he can sometimes go for guys his own age too.

Once he settles down, it is usually with a guy from a similar background as his own. If not someone who is from the same town, school, or socioeconomic sphere. Though this guy will be decidedly less sunny than him.

He will typically find himself in the black cat and golden retriever type of relationship. Where he is the golden retriever.

He wants to shower so much affection on his partner that it has a healing and stabilizing effect.

He is seeking to be the most successful good-looking, masculine gay couple of all time.

He may attract a partner who is willing to bask in the glory of being around the Leo man and not want to put in any work, only reaping the rewards that the Leo man worked so hard to achieve.

However, the Leo man expects his partner to at least pretend to have some sort of ambition. So, if his partner doesn’t he will leave them in a heartbeat.

He is the most jealous man with, hands down, the hottest temper of any man in the zodiac, and he takes cheating as a crime against nature, God, and along such lines, himself.

That goes for the straight Leo man as well.

The only way the Leo man would entertain the thought of another in the bedroom is if that third party wanted nothing more than to watch. He loves to show off how good he is.

Deep kissing and body contact typically top the list of his favorite things. Along with massage and mutual masturbation.

He will let his lover “blow” him, but he is uncomfortable in the service position.

He wants to be adored in the bedroom so, his partner should be the one to worship his body, not the other way around.

He places great emphasis on love as opposed to sex, and if his heart isn’t in it, then he will not do it.

[lotus-tower]

okay so. i've always thought it was obvious that yoshiwara in flames arc's main relevance to gintama's overall narrative is as the prelude to rakuyou. like it's not thematically very interesting on its own, right? but it exists mainly for kagura and kamui's sake, establishing the sort of parallelism that gintama lives off of. it isn't really that connected to the red spider arc even though at first it might seem to be.

but i had no idea about the meaning of the name "rakuyou" until i saw @suchira 's post about it earlier today. and before that i also hadn't thought about utsuro's connection to the sun, which they've also talked about.

given everything that happens in rakuyou, this has expanded my thoughts quite a bit! i'm going be thinking through this as i go, so this is going to be me rambling.

housen is one of the few big arc villains who don't feel related to gintoki. jirocho, jiraia, oboro, takasugi--these kinds are obviously meant to be foils to gintoki. isaburo functions differently as a character, but even he gets directly compared to gintoki by nobume. but housen isn't really there for gintoki--he's there for kamui. he isn't a particularly interesting character, nor is his death very satisfying because of the wishywashy writing about hinowa showing kindness to him at the end. previously i'd thought that his thing with the sun was just a weaker example of craving something that would destroy you, and/or running away from one's weaknesses and vulnerabilities to the point that you become a sort of husk.

that's probably still a thing, but the introduction of the sun motif on the much more meaning-dense end of gintama adds so much more. because now the pre-existing thematic framework of gintama can do the heavy lifting for housen (who is, again, a pretty uninteresting character), hinowa (who is cool, but suffers from both Woman and Mom in shounen), and tsukuyo (who is very cool, but suffers egregiously from Woman in shounen).

so what is housen, really? he's the guy kamui chose to go with when making his very bad life decisions, the end result of the path he decided to pursue. for simplicity let's call him kamui bad end, though they aren't very comparable in canon itself because housen doesn't come across as nearly self-destructive enough. but the basic logic is that housen is one of those characters who gave up everything in single-minded pursuit of power--he's a flat character because he already "emptied himself out", as kamui says, before the series started. (but then he got scared and lonely, and all that.)

what's funny is that if housen is a bad end, then the guy who he considers his rival automatically comes to mind as an opposed route. i think it would be a serious stretch to call umibouzu the "good end" for kamui, and that's definitely part of the point in how the yato are written. but in any case, kamui clearly looked both ways (insert roads leading to two castles meme) and saw housen stereotypical villain bad end on one side, and his dad on the other. so obviously he chose housen.

rakuyou is a planet where it's always overcast. you could say that kamui chose to leave that "safety" in order to pursue something that shone much brighter to him, even if it would disintegrate him in the end. or, since rakuyou's name invokes the sun, you could say that he chose to flee the place of his weakness and pain, where his family was, like housen deciding to flee the sun and build an underground paradise.

when i go over my gintama cast tarot assignments, i always hesitate over hinowa. is she the Sun? or the Empress? how can i choose? and i think this is essentially the same conundrum. and i think the fact that she's both (thankfully, actual gintama storytelling isn't restricted to 1 character = 1 arcana) also provides us with the best answer here. hinowa is the object of yearning of both housen (as the sun) and of seita (as a mother). obviously, as i said before, the whole seita-hinowa thing is meant to lay the groundwork for kamui's motivations, and is also why he's introduced in this arc in the particular way that he is. but kamui is both seita and housen. he's the child yearning for his mother, but also the warlord who fears the sun so much he'll lock not only himself but countless others into the dark forever. but housen also desperately longed for the sun. kamui looks down on seita for being weak, and he looks down on housen for choosing to drown himself in vices at the end of his life. in the end, he doesn't kill either one of them.

if the sun is what kamui yearns for, he wants to leave rainy "rakuyou" behind--and/or he misses his home, his childhood, his family, even if these things feel like they will destroy him. or, if the sun is what kamui seeks to avoid, he wants to turn away from "rakuyou", all the things that hold him down so that he can throw himself into single-minded pursuit of self-destruction--and/or he's afraid of the weakness and pain that the sun inflicts on him, and desires to be strong enough that he won't feel them. see, a whole lot of words to say the same thing over and over.

i've always assigned housen the Emperor arcana. and i've often wondered, should it be umibouzu instead? should it be utsuro? and that, i think, is another illumination. thank you tarot for being an icon. it's so effective here because gintama is predictably built on parallels, and overlapping arcana assignments are bound to make you think: why?

in the end, housen builds a city underground in order to avoid the sun, but he also severs hinowa's ankles so that he can hold her, the sun proxy, captive in his grasp. he can't bear to feel sunlight, but he can't bear to let it go either. kamui is much the same, but he's young--he thinks he can let it go, his fears and regrets haven't caught up to him yet, because he still has so much to reach for. housen attained the peak of his strength and notoriety, and then there was little left for him.

what else happens in rakuyou? well, oboro and takasugi fight. oboro is sort of a seita figure in his own right, if seita had burned down yoshiwara in hopes that it would drive hinowa running to him. of course, seita didn't know that hinowa couldn't run; and oboro didn't know that shouyou couldn't, either.

but aside from seita and housen, there's another character in yoshiwara who yearns for the sun--not to possess it, but to protect it, to serve it. tsukuyo is an interesting character heavily let down by the realities of living in shounen jump. from my own understanding of sorachi's character, i don't think the following was intentional on his part. but i do think there are real reasons why these parallels are textually present (mainly through gintoki).

tsukuyo is the closest oboro has in this series to someone similar to him. not in the sense of a reflection in the mirror or hole-sided adjacency, but as in someone who sort of has a similar job and background to him. or had, anyway. as i implied earlier, the few, specific, clearly intentional similarities she has with gintoki (hello red spider) bleed over into her similarities with oboro, of course, because gintoki and oboro are... you know. just look at them.

tsukuyo swore herself to hinowa, but technically she was working under housen. she led housen's paramilitary force--fortunately, the hyakka loved her a lot more than the naraku were probably ever able to have an opinion about oboro. i don't think tsukuyo and oboro would ever get along--but they did have the same job. oboro did it in the heavens, tsukuyo did it underground. anyway, hinowa "saved" tsukuyo by teaching her about fighting from inside one's cage, and so tsukuyo gladly walked into the cage, just like oboro returning to the naraku without shouyou. because they thought it would be worth it. and also because tsukuyo had been groomed from a young age for the Hole (apologies to those who haven't read my ouroboros essay), to give up on her selfhood, and also to kill her sensei (hello gintoki). but hinowa remained around, unlike shouyou. tsukuyo never thought she could really free her--but protecting her, being able to see her, was enough.

oboro's life problem is a bit like if hinowa and housen were the same person. but kamui would see in that pairing only a reflection of his parents. and also, kouka is a bit like if hinowa and utsuro were the same person. but utsuro is already like if shouyou and utsuro were the same person--because oboro's actual life problem is that shouyou and utsuro are the same person.

i've spoken a lot about tarot, but the moon in gintama has little to do with the Moon arcana. in gintama it's the backdrop, the symbol of promises--promises made, promises fulfilled, promises held on to dearly whether they can be fulfilled or not. i don't truly think that the sun as represented by hinowa interacts directly with this. but tsukuyo and oboro share moon-related names, and their promises (or rather, their vows of devotion) towards hinowa/shouyou are one-sided. one-sided promises aren't a problem in gintama--our silver-haired protagonist wouldn't be alive if it weren't for them.

if the naraku, if utsuro, if oboro under utsuro is associated with the sun through the yatagarasu, perhaps it's because of the evaporation of the promise through the eclipsing of the moon. shouka sonjuku, after all, burned down, and utsuro emerged from a pyre. and though i think that the sun is overall a motif much more strongly associated with the yato--that which they avoid, are weak to, and secretly long for--i don't think that's incompatible with the crow-meaning.

rabbits can die of loneliness, you know--or they can die from overheating in the sun. i think the question here is, is this a trick question? are those two the same thing?