#but I know that you really do want to please her so I really hope things work out for you
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numinousher · 3 days ago
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TOUCH ── sylus.
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summary: touches with whispered promises
note: thank you again for helping me @an-ever-angry-bi
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“I’m mad at you.”
Words have never scared Sylus more than those words uttered by the love of his life that has his heart in her hand.
His face maintained stoic, not wanting her to hear the way his heart skipped at the words and the way his head immediately recounted his whole entire day to try to determine what he did or said wrong.
“For what, sweetie?” He softly asked, leaning back on the chair of his office. His eyes ran over your figure, admiring your pretty pouty face and the way your brows were furrowed so cutely while you wore a necklace he bought you for your anniversary. He patted his lap. “Come here and tell me.”
You walked to him with a small huff and plopped on his lap.
“I'm a very independent woman,” you said in a very serious tone.
“I know, sweetheart, and I love that for you.”
“I can fight.”
“Nothing turns me on more than you defending yourself,” Sylus continues to comment in a low tone, his fingers softly running up and down your arm while he doesn't stray away from your side profile.
“I can shoot someone.”
“I told you I can get a gun engraved with our names on them, sweetie,” he says, his lips softly brushing your neck, placing small kisses.
“And I can be by myself.”
“Sadly.”
“So, why the hell do I yearn for your single presence and touch when I haven’t seen you in hours?” You groaned out, subconsciously craning your neck as he grabs your waist. “Not even that, I get upset when you don’t respond for two hours. Two!”
He darkly chuckles. “It seems this kitty who loves baring her fangs loves being coddled, hmm?” His nose brushes against the pulse of your neck, softly inhaling your scent. “You want me to text you more often?”
“Please?”
“Whatever you want,” he muttered on your neck. “I hope you know, though, the way you’re so… independent, so badass that you can handle yourself, so headstrong…” his lips moved close to the shell of your ear as his words turned whispered. “The things you do to me.”
“You really like that about me?”
“If you were to stab me, I would stab myself deeper into the blade to meet your fingertips holding the handle,” he whispered as if he was sharing a secret, his glistening ruby colored eyes meeting yours. “My body yearns for your touch that I wouldn’t care about dying at your hands. I’ll die happy just getting to brush against your skin.”
You let out a shuddered breath as his lips hovered over yours. He nudged his nose against your own, glancing at your lips.
“You’re crazy…” you commented with no malice at all.
He smiled a little. “Oh, yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“How so?” He continued to speak in a low tone. “Because I would let you kill me? Because I would get on my knees to worship you like you deserve to? Call me crazy all you want, sweetie, I just want you in ways you don’t know.”
He presses his lips against yours, savoring your taste with a soft moan, relishing in the way your body felt underneath his fingertips.
He backed away and looked into your eyes again with dilated pupils.
“Anything happens to you,” he started, his hand placing itself on your cheek so the pad of his thumb could rub itself over your bottom lip, “I will set this stupid world on fire, you hear me?” You slowly nod. “Ask me for whatever, ask me for anything you want, I will gladly do anything because if I can set this world on fire for you, I will do anything you want before you could breathe. You want me to text you more? Done. Want to go on more dates? I will personally buy every restaurant with your favorite food so you could enjoy it without disturbance. That’s fine with you?”
“Yes… thank you.”
“Don’t thank me. Ask me for the moon, stars, anything, it’s yours,” he tilted his head to the side with a small smile you couldn’t help but smile, too. “It’s called the bare minimum, sweetie.”
“Sy, that is not—” he cuts you off with a chuckle, his fingers moving from your bottom lip to your neck.
“Bare minimum. Never thank me for being the boyfriend you deserve,” he softly spoke, pressing soft kisses on your lips. He savored each one. “Now come on. Let’s go on a trip.”
“It’s 10 at night?” You questioned, almost perplexed
“You should be getting used to unexpected trips, sweetie,” he chuckled, helping you get up. He got up next, hovering over your figure. He rubbed your cheekbone softly. “Can’t have people thinking I can’t treat my girl right, hmm?”
“God, I’m in love with you.”
“And I’m in love with you,” he kisses you once again. “Come on. The jet should be ready. Don’t worry about clothes. I’ll buy you anything you want once we get there.”
“Ugh, you’re so hot.”
“Mmm, compliment me more, sweetie, we might do some things in the jet.”
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ang3ltine · 3 days ago
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𝐖𝐞'𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 '𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐬'?- College au
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⤿ 𝖿𝗍 𝖬𝗎𝗌𝗂𝖼 student 𝖲𝖾 𝗆𝗂 𝗑 𝖥𝖺𝗌𝗁𝗂𝗈𝗇 student 𝖿𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋
𝖲𝗎𝗆𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗒: this is just a small headcanon that shows how it would be like to have a roommate like Se mi.
𝖶𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌: mentions of alcohol, drunk Se mi, smoking, suggestive themes, abusive relationship and violence (not too extreme).
𝖠𝗎𝗍𝗁𝗈𝗋𝗌 𝗇𝗈𝗍𝖾𝗌: Don't worry this mostly contains fluff!! Also I hope you enjoy!
𖦹 It was the start of a new year in College and you had decided to swap roommates with another girl. The reason was that your old roommate was a pain in the ass and you'd had enough.
𖦹 By the time you had entered your new dorm room, another girl was unpacking her stuff. She was tall, had short dark hair and piercings on her nose and bottom lip. Honestly you had mixed feelings, she was super hot but also kind of intimidating?
𖦹 Nonetheless, despite you two being polar opposites of eachother. You both got along pretty well. Your roommate was a music major named Se mi, her aesthetic was more simple and darker than yours. Whereas you liked your pinks and whites and was a Fashion Major.
𖦹 You thought that Se mi would be the type to keep to herself and not talk much with you, but you were dead wrong. She's super kind and caring but was also a big tease.
𖦹 Furniture shopping!! You guys would go to the mall to buy cute furniture for your dorm room. Se mi picked out cute matching cups with Cherries for you guys to share ♡
𖦹 Se mi legit lives in your bed at this point. She loves how your mattress was much more plush and comfortable than hers. You'd always have to kick her out if you find her sneaking under your covers at night.
"Se mi? What the hell are you doing??" You hissed through your teeth as Se mi slips under your covers.
"What..? Oh don't mind me, just go back to sleep and pretend you never saw me," she'd state casually while snuggling further into the blanket. This had been going on since maybe the 3rd week of the 1st semester?
Groaning in annoyance while you face palmed, you had to calm your heartbeat down. At some point you had begun to grow a small crush on her but blamed it on your lack of success in your love life.
𖦹 Speaking of your love life. It was a legit mess. Every boy you had been with had either cheated on you or was just a fling. The most recent 'boyfriend' you had was super manipulative and controlling. Feeling like you didn't really have a choice , you stuck with him. Because he gave you what you thought was love.
𖦹 Se mi hates this man with her guts and believes you deserve better. Literally has an existential crisis because she doesn't know whether the feelings she has for you is platonic or much more.
𖦹 Finally she had enough when she heard you crying by your bedside, keening down and clutching your stomach. He had punched you, hard. Without a second thought, she stormed her way through the boy's dormitory and confronted the guy. Leaving him with a broken nose and a clear message.
"Don't mess with my girl."
𖦹 Se mi likes when you style her clothes or pick out outfits for her. Also she absolutely loves it when you actually make clothes for her! Literally adores every accessory or shirt/sweater you design for her.
𖦹 She's a smoker and gets drunk from time to time. This was so she could cope with her own problems, until you coerced her to drink less and smoke outside. As her birthday gift, you got her the vivienne westwood heart shaped lighter that had been on her wishlist. You may or may not have taken a look at it while she wasn't looking. She so wanted to marry you on the spot when you handed it to her.
"Please marry me!!" She'd scream, literally almost waking up the girls next door.
"Geez! Ok, fine! I'll marry you, just be quiet!" You whisper shouted as she hands you a makeshift ring that she totally didn't make right infront of you.
𖦹 Don't worry, she gets you a real one with a golden band and a pink gem in the middle. Which you love and Cherish ofcourse! You two would definitely have matching promise rings, with hers being a silver band and a black gem.
𖦹 Both of you collect figurines so you two definitely go to popmart together! She likes Hirono and Kubo whereas you liked Skullpanda and Molly figurines. You'd decorate your room with showcases and get matching labubu's together!! So cute
𖦹 Would drop you off at your class before going to hers cause both the music department and fashion/design department are close by.
𖦹 Gives you privacy whenever you need it and isn't the type of person to eavesdrop in a conversation that you're having with a friend. Unless you personally come to her for advice.
𖦹 When you two started dating, she was the one to ask you to be her girlfriend. She knew you had feelings for her too but you didn't know how to tell her. Which she completely understands, this was something new to you. She took her time with you and eventually you got more comfortable in the relationship.
𖦹 Ideal dating spots would be around or near campus, unfortunately. This is due to your busy schedules and you both take your majors seriously. If you guys are on break, she definitely take you outside the city to the beach. If you didn't want to travel far, she'd take you to cute cafés and arcades to have fun and chill at the same time.
𖦹 Very much into PDA! Holds your hand/waist when your walking to class or talking a walk around campus. Would teasingly whisper obscene things into your ear just to get a reaction out of you. Often resulting in you both making out in the girls washroom or a janitors closet.
{Nsfw}
𖦹 Oh Lord you're in for a long ride. Yall share the same washroom so expect shower sex from time to time. You'd have to shove her out the bathroom because she wouldn't leave, when you just wanted a peaceful shower.
𖦹 Is surprisngly super sweet and soft during intimacy. A soft dom most of the time but can be a switch too. However, if she's feeling frustrated then expect her to be a little rough. But she'd give you the best aftercare, making sure to rub your sides and stomach. Would give you painkillers and a warm bubbly bath. If you wanted, she would join you. If not then she'd wait until you've finished first.
𖦹 you guys share a bed at this point, so now you both have a small double bed with a super plush mattress and insanely fluffy pillows and massive duvet. Will never keep her hands to herself so expect lazy morning sex or insane makeout sessions.
"Why're you so embarrassed? I've literally seen you naked so there's no need to be shy~" she'd say teasingly while cuddling with you in bed.
"God you're insufferable..!"
Safe to say you two didn't make it to your first class.
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laufeysvalentine · 2 days ago
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i want you.
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remus lupin x fem!reader | masterlist
summary ༄ remus x best friend!reader -- or in which you're in love with your best friend, but he's not exactly in love with you back... angst
word count ༄ 3.2k
nora’s notes ༄ eeek my first writing post!! i'm so excited. this is kind of bad but IDC part two will be coming and i swear will be better written okay enjoy!! mwah 💘
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“moony!” you sing-song as you twirl into his dorm, lips spread into a wide grin. “we’re leaving for hogsmeade, hurry up.” 
he’s on his bed, glasses slipping down the bridge of his nose as he glances up from his book, suppressing a smile when he sees you. “hi, y/n.” 
he embodies the word comfort, you think. he’s wearing one of his trademark warm wool sweaters, an empty mug of tea by his knee, gray blanket draped across his lap, and that smile. it would be the death of you, you were sure of it. 
“hi,” you respond, clasping his book and setting it onto his bedside table. “c’mon, everyone’s waiting for us downstairs.” 
he sighs so deeply you think he might crack a lung, and loops his pointer finger through one of the belt loops of your jeans to pull you onto his bed. “do we have to?” 
as much as you’d like to stay here with him, you also want to buy more chocolate frogs, so you spring back up, tugging at his hand. “yes, please. i’m low on my candy stock.” 
he groans, letting you pull him off of his bed and out of the dorm. “your sweet tooth is killing me.” 
you shrug. “that’s what you signed up for when you said yes to being friends in first year. now you’re just living with it.” 
he just hums in agreement, letting you wrap your arm around his. remus lupin, your best friend. he’s the kindest man you’ve ever met, let alone known. it would be a lie to say you weren’t completely and utterly in love with him, and even more of a lie to say you hadn’t been since before you were a teenager, even if you didn’t understand it then. but, alas, as soon as you’d admitted it to yourself, you also resolved to never, ever tell him. you were sure he didn’t feel the same about you, and why would you carelessly toss away the best friendship and most understanding person ever just for some feelings? 
and so, you waited and hoped, prayed that it would go away. you would move on and keep your friendship. 
and, of course, you didn’t. 
“y/n!” james calls once he sees the two of you walking down the stairs to where the rest of the marauders are waiting. “finally.” 
“we sent you up like ten minutes ago,” peter complains, frowning. 
you shrug. “oops.” 
remus shifts his arm to settle around your waist, nudging you in front of him. “well, we’re here now, so get a move on.” 
you thread the hand he placed on your stomach with your own, thumb rubbing circles onto his. he smiles down on you, and that smile, oh, lord. you could see it a million times and never have enough. you’d jump over bridges to have him watch you like that all the time. you’d sell your soul to be his, really and truly. and the worst part is, you have no shame about it. merlin, you’re in love. 
jelly beans or chocolate frogs, that is the question. you glance at one, then the other, then the other again. your shoulders slump. it’s too hard of a decision. you’re about to cave and get both when you feel warm arms wrap around your waist, a chin settling onto your shoulder. without looking, you press a kiss to remus’ cheek. “hi.” 
“hi,” he replies, inhaling your scent, nose tucked between your ear and your hair. 
“chocolate frogs or jelly beans?” you ask anxiously, holding up the two in front of you. “or both?” 
“both,” he agrees with you, and you can feel the tension slowly leaving him as he stands behind you, entwined with you. 
you nod, happy with his judgment, about to speak when someone beats you to it. 
“remus?” a voice yells from behind, excitement coloring her tone. 
you know who this is without looking too, but you wish you didn’t. remus slowly stands back to his whole height, and the sudden absence of his warmth makes you shiver. you turn just as he does, even if you don’t want to see the girl beaming at him. 
you know her, of course you do. doesn’t everyone know celeste huxley, the most beautiful hufflepuff to grace hogwarts’ campus? angels sing when she walks past, men and women fall to her feet in her wake. she’s worshiped, adored. okay, you’re being dramatic, but still. 
you hate her. 
you hate her silky hair, her evergreen smile, her cesspool of kindness. 
and you hate yourself more for hating her. she’s never been mean to you a day in her life, she couldn’t be mean to anyone even if she tried. but still. she’s who you’ve tried to be your whole life. she is the blueprint, the model with cherry-red high heels you wobble and blister your feet in. she has all Os on her OWLs, victoria’s secret hair, people who love on her like a celebrity. and she’s fucking obsessed with your best friend, of course. she could have anyone in the world, and she picked him. why couldn’t she love sirius or james, like half the girls at the school? why did she have to want remus? 
and the worst part is, she deserves him. he deserves someone as perfect as he is, even if that’s celeste. 
as you swallow down your hatred, you realize she’s started to pull remus away from you, pulling on his sleeve towards the jelly slugs, and you almost lob your stupid chocolate frog at her head. tears sting your eyes and you try your best to blink them back as you watch remus watch you, only half-listening to her blabber. he knows you hate her, and the most sheepish, guilty look comes over his face. you ignore him, putting your candy back, too upset to think about eating it. luckily, you spot sirius in the corner and quickly try to make your way over him when you’re pulled back. 
remus has got ahold of your belt loops again, and you watch him whisper something to celeste before gently removing her hand from his sweater and pulling away. he chose you now, but for how long? the thought chills you, goosebumps prickling your skin, your heart. 
“dove,” he says quietly by your ear. “what happened to your candy?” 
“didn’t want it,” you mumble, walking towards sirius. 
“why not?” he’s dancing around the topic, and both of you know it. 
“not hungry.” 
“i’m sorry.” 
“s’not your fault,” you say. you’re not mad at him, you could never really be mad at him, but you’re upset nonetheless. you push away towards the black-haired boy perusing the shelves. “siri, you done?” 
you link arms with your other friend, leading him out of honeyduke’s, leaving remus trailing behind. 
“hi dove.” a voice, and its accompanying owner, peeks out from the doorway into your dorm. “may i come in?” 
“hi rem,” you say in response, beckoning him in, putting your book to the side to let him crawl onto you. “can’t you always?” 
his shoulders sag slightly, slumping into your bed as soon as he reaches it. his head is in your lap, and he closes his eyes once you begin to massage his scalp with your fingers, pressing a kiss to your exposed hipbone next to him. 
you don’t say anything, you just let the silence dance between the two of you. 
he’s so pretty. you brush some of his sandy strands out of his face to let yourself just admire him. the towering giant and all his gentleness. your fingers trace the outlines of his face, the scars that decorate it, all the way down to his right pinky, where he has the cutest tattoo. 
i love you is all you want to say. the words pulse at your throat, begging you to let them free. but you can’t. you can’t lose him. anyone else, sure, you would do it. but not him. not remus, your remus. 
when he wakes, groggy but grounded, you have a hot cup of tea ready by your bed, ready for his consumption. you hand it to him as soon as he’s fully awake, pulling himself off of you to accept the mug. “i don’t deserve you, dovie.” 
“don’t say stuff like that, rem. if anything, you deserve better.” you press a kiss to his cheek, smiling. 
“there’s nobody and nothing better than you,” he promises, hand landing on your lower thigh to massage it gently. you smile, letting the quiet linger between the two of you a little longer before speaking up. 
“you wanna talk about it?” you ask, watching him sip his tea. 
he gives you the most adoring smile, and you want to put it in a box and lock it up and keep it forever. “just tired.” 
“okay,” you say, searching his face to verify what he’s saying. “you can always talk to me, you know.” 
“thank you.” remus is always sincere, it’s one of the things you love about him, but he seems especially sincere now. “you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, y/n.” 
“and you are to me,” you whisper, eyes dipping to his plush pink lips. you want to kiss him so badly right now, but you know he just means it like a friend, as much as you wish it wouldn’t. 
swallowing, you wipe those ideas away, choosing to rest your head against his fleece sweater-covered shoulder. he drops a kiss onto the top of your head, and you sigh in contentment. this is why you refuse to tell him you love him. you couldn’t live without these moments. 
“there’s a party tonight at nine-ish,” he says softly. his thumb is rubbing circles on your knee. “sirius is dragging me along. will you come?” 
you contemplate it only briefly. “i’m tired, rem. you should go, though.” 
“i’ll stay back with you,” he decides with resolution. your heart melts, it’s sweet of him to want to stay with you, but you want him to have fun. plus, you can feel in how his body coiled with excitement when he talked about it–he wants to go. 
“no, go.” you glare playfully at him. “i won’t forgive you if you don’t.” 
“i’ll stay with you,” he repeats, staring right back at you. “it’s just a party. i’d stay with you forever, you know? you’re my favorite person.” 
“i’ll be mad at you if you don’t go, i swear to merlin,” you egg him on, heart melting. 
“no.” he’s too stubborn for his good. 
“i want to be alone,” you lie. you know he wants to go and you refuse to hold him back. “i might come later on, just not at nine. i’ll be there at ten, maybe.” 
“and i’ll wait for you,” he promises. 
“please, remus.” you put on your saddest tone, gaze up at him pleadingly. “i just need some alone time.” 
“you want to be alone?” he asks cautiously, searching for any hint you may be lying. 
“yes.” you cross your toes, tucked under your quads. 
he’s hesitating, and as if in perfect timing, a knock sounds at your door before a familiar head of black hair peeks through. 
“moony, let’s go. leave poor y/n alone.” sirius clicks his tongue. 
you push remus’ shoulder lightly, gesturing for him to go. he casts one long look at your face, as if memorizing every ridge. 
“she’s not going to change while we’re gone, get a move on,” sirius groans from the door. you nod at the statement, and remus concedes. 
“i’ll be here the whole time,” you promise. 
“call me if you get lonely.” he makes you swear before reluctantly getting up. you kiss his hand to send him off. 
you were lying when you said you would join him at nine. five minutes after he’s out the door, you’re fast asleep under the covers, the ghost of his touch comforting you. 
as soon as your eyes open, you let out a sound of disappointment. you can tell you haven’t slept through the night, as none of your roommates are in their beds, and they always sleep in. the clock reads that it’s only a bit before eight forty five, and you roll over in your bed. you know you won’t be able to fall back asleep, but you try anyway, until the door slams and your eyes fly open. 
it’s lily, face flushed with the cold and excitement. the second she sees you kissed by sleep, she covers her mouth. “sorry, y/n! were you sleeping?” 
you wave her off. “no, i was already awake. what’s up?” 
“james is going to be at the party tonight. will you come? please, please, please? i don’t want to go alone with him,” she begs. “please.” 
you weigh your options: if you stay here, you’ll just lay in bed, not sleeping. you might as well go with her, you’ll see remus there too. 
“okay,” you agree, and she practically drags you out of bed, she’s so happy. 
even though lily’s the one who dragged you here to keep her away from james, she’s off with him in a corner within ten minutes of you getting there, leaving you in a sea of other people, alone. of course, you know most of your housemates that are stuffed into this crowded common room, but you don’t know any particular one of them enough to properly go up to and chat. you sit awkwardly on a couch for a few minutes, next to couples making out, before finally just giving up and getting ready to leave. 
you saw sirius going into a bedroom with someone, so he’s out of the picture, peter’s smoking in the corner with some ravenclaws you have no interest in speaking with, james is alone with lily, and he’d kill you if you interrupted them, and you have absolutely no clue where remus is. 
whatever. you walk towards the door to the girls’ dormitories, stumbling over students on the way, when you just barely catch a glimpse of sandy hair outside on a balcony. you’d know it anywhere–that’s remus. you scramble towards him, eager to see a friendly face, hand cracking the door open, when just as quickly as it came, the excitement dies in your throat. 
because just behind remus is a girl you hate to see. celeste, hair floating behind her. if you blink hard enough, you see a breeze wafting through her hair as her fingers knot around remus’–your remus–neck. his hands are on the small curve of her waist, and he’s pushing her against the railing and, oh god–they’re kissing. 
you let out a thick gasp and your hand slaps over your mouth. you turn and flee. they probably heard you, but they can’t maneuver through the crowd like you can. within seconds, you’re sure you’ve lost any trace of them, darting through people as you sprint outside to the outside of the castle. sure it’s past curfew, but you can’t bring yourself to care. 
no one will see you now. 
he’s supposed to be yours. he was yours, he was yours in more than just a best friend. those nights when he fell asleep in your bed, having you wrap your arms around him for warmth, he was yours. when you always visited him post-full moon in the apothecary, and as much as he wishes to push you away, you never let him, he was yours then. when he lets you in, truly and fully, and lets himself cry against you, letting you take care of him for once. you’re the only person he’s ever let himself cry in front of.
and even though you’d deny it a million times, and you did, to sirius, to james, you’ve always hoped that he liked you back. deep down, in the parts of your soul you only ever showed to him. he didn’t have to love you, even. just like, that would be enough. anything would. 
but that was too much for him, clearly. 
you’re crying. tears, fat and hot, soaking the skin on your cheeks. head in your hands, letting your open palms pool the salty water. you feel nothing but yourself and the wind against the cold of the stone steps, whipping your hair around. 
“dove.” 
you squeeze your eyes shut, hoping you’re hallucinating, praying the voice you just heard wasn’t real. you couldn’t see him right now. that would be humiliating. 
“y/n?” 
you crack your eye open when you hear the same voice, trying to swallow your sobs back and failing as they manifest into ugly hiccups. you’re not hallucinating. merlin damn it. 
in front of you, peering up at your blotchy face, is remus lupin, your best friend. the man who’s not yours. 
he’s on the step below you,  but one hand snakes its way onto your knee, soothing your skin with his slender thumb, the other finding your hand to intertwine your fingers. fuck, his touch both makes you lean into him and want to throw up at the same time. his eyes are chock-full of compassion, and god, you hate it. “what’s wrong?” 
his words send you blubbering into tears again, rubbing at your eyes as something splits open in your chest. “n-nothing.” 
“something’s wrong, love. let me help you. let me in,” he pleads in the softest tone, and you have to fight to not give in, to wrap your arms around him and never let go. remember celeste, remember that terrible sight of his lips on hers. 
“remus, leave me alone.” you’re shaking, but somewhere inside you, you find your resolve. you stand, pulling away from him, and make to run back inside the castle, but his long legs catch up to you easily, arm shooting around your waist when your knees buckle and you collapse onto the floor in sobs. 
“y/n, you’re scaring me,” he says, panic accumulating in his voice. “please tell me what’s wrong and i’ll fix it, i promise. please, baby. it’s killing me hear you cry.” 
you’re so close to the doors, you can see them. you stand again. “you don’t get to say that.” 
“what?” his arm’s still around your shoulder and you shove it off. 
“stop it! you’re so mean, remus. you don’t get to call me dove and call me baby and say stupid things like how there’s nobody better than me and i’m your favorite person and then go off and kiss other girls,” you spit out on the verge of hyperventilating. you don’t even know what you’re saying anymore. it’s just coming out, spewing out of your mouth like the vomit that’s sure to follow. but even as each word shocks you, you know they ring true. “i hate you for it. i hate you for leading me on for years when i’ve loved you since we were kids! you’re terrible, remus. i hate you.” 
he’s absolutely stunned trying to process your words, and you use the momentary distraction to race back into the school, gunning for your dorm and locking it once you’re inside. the image of celeste and remus plays through your mind all night, so much that you can barely even think about how you confessed your love to him.
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masterlist | next part
tags @lydiasfalling @dancingwithourhandsuntied
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myrruwrites · 2 days ago
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PLEASE write more streamer jinx😩🙏🙏 I only ever see other characters. it was so funny reading it and imagining what out of pocket things jinx would say
“Long night” | Gf!Jinx doing streaming marathons.
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A/N: This is just meant to be a rough draft, putting some thoughts into words. I’m aware it’s not my best work, I just really wanted to give it a shot. Reader wears glasses btw! | thank you a ton for giving me an excuse to write more of this. I love streamer!jinx. I hope this is alright!
WC: 400(?), CC: 2,155 | CW: Gunshot mentions. Jinx is a Fortnite lover. | Pairing: Streamer!Jinx x F!Reader.
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You toss and turn, stirring slightly in your sleep. Your eyes flutter open slightly, your gaze meeting the numbers on the alarm clock. 4:00am. “What the fuck am I doing up at 4am?” You think to yourself. You roll onto your side to see if Jinx is asleep still, but to your surprise, you find the spot next to you empty and cold, like she hadn’t been there for hours. Where is she?
That’s when you hear it, the slight sound of gunshots. You let out a soft sigh, prying the covers off of you as you stumble to your feet. You know exactly where Jinx is, exactly what she’s doing.
As you wrap your favourite robe around you, you slide your glasses on. You make your way through the hallway, and unsurprisingly, the door at the end has a bright light peeking through. You can hear the gunshots get louder, mixed with playful rambling. “Ha! Take that! Chat, did you see that?! Headshot!”. A soft smile forms on your face at the familiar voice. You make your way up to the door, before creaking it open slightly. Surely enough, Jinx was sat playing Fortnite attentively, her webcam clearly on.
She doesn’t seem to be paying attention to chat, so you decide to use this to your advantage. You slide into the room, creeping closer. At this point you can see the chat yourself. They’re all saying hello to you, pointing you out. However, Jinx seems completely oblivious to your presence. You place your palms over her headphones, your fingers lightly tugging at them and prying them off her head. It’s at this moment she snaps back to reality and her surroundings, she tilts her head back, looking up into your eyes, “hey tuts!”, before turning back to chat. “why didn’t-ya warn me she was here?”. You laugh softly before responding on behalf of her chat, “they did, I saw them. You just weren’t paying attention, little miss blue.” She scowls as you playfully poke her nose, but you can see the undeniable smirk forming on the edge of her lips. “Yeah yeah, just get in here.” she murmurs, hauling you onto her lap before focusing on her game once more.
“Fuck! That cunt was afk killing me! Chat, I’m so gonna get her back!”
God, she’s such a doofus. Atleast she’s your doofus... this is going to be a long night.
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rose-maidenn · 3 days ago
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Pick a card : Your 2025 , predictions based on each month
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1-2
Hey guys how are you Happy New Year \(^-^)/ , I know I delayed a bit (^.^) for this one but hope you enjoy this , if you resonate like and reblog and gimme feedbacks cause that's what keeps me motivated to post 🫶🦢🩷✨️
If you do like my work and would want an in depth reading please check out my :
Masterlist
Paid readings
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Pile 1 :
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January
I see you starting the year kind of defeated by the previous year it was really hard and tiring for you and tested your faith a lot , you had to make hard choices, I see that you are stuck in a toxic situation or obsessing over something that doesn't serve you . I see that by middle of January it will get better , I do see turmoil in the start but breakthrough is near and it's for you . You will go out to picnics by the end , water bodies will help you , avoid fast food alrighty and make a vision board baby cause this is your year alright .
February
Like I said circumstances will improve I see a quick change of mood in February, is it your birth month ? Celebrations are around . You will feel protected in February things will feel sweeter . You will make a quick decision that will prove to be extremely beneficial for you this maybe about getting in a relationship or joining therapy as well . You might learn more about emotional regulation and heal your heart chakra . You will be grounded in your body and approach life with meaning .
March
There's stubborn energy in march , you are still Taking things slow and steady , the next chapter of your life is about freedom and not in the sense of travelling places alone but in a sense of freedom from other people's judgements and approval I see that you might have a rip off with someone or hear that someone is leaking information about you this might be a fire sign person who's jealous of you hermit for a while and then make a move , plan in silence and win.
April
Now that you have learned a minor lesson of detachment you have vigor and life again, you will seek new opportunities might get a new hobby as well maybe surfing or racing are you info F1 ? You will also get serious about studies some major exam is on the horizon. Nights in April are significant maybe you will do lot of late night studies or sneak out at night or night rides will make you so happy .
May
For may you are in a mood of enjoyment and happiness but remember to work hard there's tendency of you being too engrossed in enjoying that you forget that your labour is yet to be completed, focus on long term goals and possibilities. You might start visiting the temple more often. The person who was leaking info earlier is gonna miss you a lot in may they might even come back to talk ti you again but you're already done with them , you are in a mode of benevolence but yet you know your value well if they do disturb you too much do a cord cutting .
June
Now is the true time to enjoy your fruits of labour you had done in may , your success rate is high you're spiritually aware and emotionally well regulated, you will truly be happy I see reconciliation of someone you loved when you were young maybe a friend or teenage crush kinda vibe , through instagram or something. You are soaring high , your vibrations are too you're close to the sun and your thoughts will create your destiny so think positively.
July
July is also a positive fine with new opportunities and growth in the money sector of your life, if you have a new business idea or creative idea make sure that you invest in it , you will have more energy and vigor in this month but I see you being kind of lost if it's not well decided where you wanna move next so think before you leap work in the right direction and trust god . Also I see that a feminine figure most probably your aunt will get sick so take care of her if she's important to you.
August
August will focus on healing your old wounds , what have you ignored , if you do your healing well by doing shadow work you will get a breakthrough and live well by circumstance , might get a new house , I hear a moving house as well , you also might be s*xually active a lot during this time , Choose your partners wisely. This person might be an air sign . I see you might try to numb your pain but don't this healing will liberate you so choose this .
September
In September you're not giving a fuck about anyone , you're doing what you like how you like , leaving people and situations and praying a lot , I see some sadness about things left behind this could be stuff that didn't work out in business family or love , if it is the person mentioned in August then you can avoid the pain by being cautious and not attaching yourself by simple discernment I see 1111 , you can choose what you want to happen
October
October is literally like live through the pain moment 💀 I see a hike in finances but your mental health is detoriating you're staying alone , thinking too much and explaining too much , it's necessary that you give yourself a break here okay talk to a friend please please I beg because I see these great times for you which you may fail to recognize because you're too much in your head , it's really important to focus on you in October, mute the noise and focus on you . Eat dates , go to a date and save the date because you're a star.
November
Silent night holy night all is calm all is bright energy , this year Christmas is gonna be lit and you're preparing from November haha I see you getting advent calender ordering gifts for yourself and family . You're gonna be In a supernova mode excessive focus on your goals and you're like you will destroy anyone who will come in your way energy , you're protective and calm it's like you're a mafia boss observing your opponent and waiting for your minions to attack , lol you're gonna have fun in November a lot of funn.
December
December calls for a dark night of the soul heavy reflection on your year and the endings you have had this year , despite being scared you were strong and did what had to be done and you're proud of yourself by the middle of the month . I see you cooking a lot and going to shopping a lot mostly groceries you will be more confident and feel amazing in your body if you had a weight loss goal this year drumroll I see you meeting it . Love Love , you're doing great.
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Pile 2 :
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January :
Fire in your heart and clear vision is what you're going for in January , I see the circumstances might not be the most favourable but you're hopeful in the midst of a chaos, the happenings have made you instill a sense of balance within oneself and clear sight for what you truly want. You will be presented with a choice in January a choice of new life a new belief a new mindset and it will lead to great outcomes , I sense some modelling offer or working in corporate sector .
February:
The opportunities of January seem to be at full action in February you're more confident than ever , you're at eagle eye view towards the things that you want , your intuition is strong now you're observing the small details and working on them to correct them . Like posture, working on a project you really consider important. The advice is to lay on grass and watch the clouds it will give you comfort. Rest and relax and let universe prepare your auspicious way .
March :
Money is incoming in March, as March is actually the astrological new year I see that you will feel it more than the offers the weight of the time and you will look forward to everything, you're not afraid to work hard and you're really admired for those qualities. I see that you might have recovered from a breakup and now you're set on this path all over again , don't be scared the universe holds your hand , it won't set something in your path that you cannot handle.
April :
You will have ample resources in April to the point that you will become detached with money because you realise that there are much more things to life. You will be more spiritual and find fulfillment in your family and spend quality time with them , a kid maybe Born during this time or you might get pregnant so if you don't want that be safe . As for your love life I sense turbulence cause by old people so don't let the oldies in. Work on healing your sacral chakra in April.
May:
In May your love life seems great tbh , movie dates , colouring together , park dates etc a lot will be happening and it's nice to see . And I see in may you might become too detached with money you may feel drained so you catch up now , multiple investments Will be made by you . One of the sectors good for you will be wine , invest in a wine brewery or gold , both will work well. If you worship Lakshmi this is the month you get serious about her cause she's ready to bless you so so much .
June :
June is full of fun with friends but also a lot of endings due to arguments , make sure you more along with the right people and don't settle because in case you're you're moving with idiots they will exactly show you why they are an idiot , might make remarks on your body and make you feel insecure not recommended. I see your partner being supportive and helping you. Ground this June and wear red lipstick man it suits you so so much it drives your partner crazy .
July :
July is a state of recovery , some of you might have felt disconnected with your high-school friends so you seeked new friends or coworkers but this month you will understand that they love you so much and they're always here for you even if it seems hard at times . You will get flowers a lot , I see a guide being extremely protective about you will be an old spirit guide . If you're a saturnian Saturn will be kind to you and you will have the courage to face anything and everything. Your mindset is good .
August:
August is the month you fall in love with the aesthetic value of the things around you , you might go redecorating your entire room or house , tip you should get a gold vase it will be lucky for you I also see some hummingbird symbolism and bells definitely great for you . Your parents will come around and you will feel connected to them a lot. For some of you around this time you might get engaged . I hear San Paolo so omg excited for you .
September :
The energy is quite similar to August, you're just very very excited in September. Might get new shoes and watch old cartoons even do some repair work in your free time . Will come across a red car and would consider even buying a car. Spiritual advancement is also seen you might have started meditating in early July and September will be the month of effects heightened awareness seeks you now . Don't take any drugs okay I see some peer pressure coming in .
October :
444 on my time zone October will be a protected month or it could mean to up your protection game mann you need a sigil to help I do see a sigil it's circle kind of arrow like , kind of reminds me of the vikings. This pile also gives me Vasalisa vibes ( fairytale) . The fire of your heart burns greater than the fire around you're the tree of life and you're the disaster of it and rebuilding of it . Omg why am I writing this one so whimsically maybe that's how you feel very whimsical very witchy .
November :
You're gonna feel really cute first of all , drenched in kisses and you're gonna party Charli xcx style, your worries are lighter your heart is bigger tbh , attending concerts can be something you do or you might start liking a new artist I hear conan gray , suki Waterhouse tbh . A month of crafts as well , creating new things like bags and cards . You seem to be on a break from work in this month or just your work is comparatively easier so you're in a state of rest .
December :
You're in worship mode in December totally offerings and affirmations are your mantra . Your year was a total up down coaster man (*>∀<*) like it had a balance of everything fun and sadness but what remained consistent is the love , romantically this year will be better for you because you have learnt from your past relationship not to depend too much on your partner and it indeed is helping you keep this one and also your mental health . Take care love love to you.
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Thanks for reading 🫶
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writtenbyhollywood · 2 days ago
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Lee byung hun but situationship maybe? Pretty please 🙏
having a situationship with lee byung-hun
a/n: thank you for the request! I actually really loved this idea
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byunghun0712
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liked by from_jjlee and others
byunghun0712 #미스터션샤인 #mrsunshine
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leebyunghunfan this is the first time I don’t see @/yourusername like his post
user1 @/leebyunghunfan probably because of the way he’s looking at the girl in the first picture
user2 interesting post…
yourstruly @/user2 bffr they’re just coworkers
user2 @/yourstruly are we looking at the same pictures ?
yourusername
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liked by yourbestfriendsuser and others
yourusername book date with the bestie cuz men ain’t shit
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randomuser wait happened?? is she talking about byung-hun??
ilovedilfs @/randomuser I really hope not
girlblogger y’all are overreacting. they never said they were together
ohfish @/girlblogger they’re prob just hooking up
yourbestfriendsuser hoes before bros
liked by author
userr12 I just noticed she unfollowed him omg…
yourusername
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liked by byunghun0712 and others
yourusername if you don’t want me DON’T ACT LIKE YOU FUCKING WANT ME
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yourbestfriendsuser he don’t know what he’s missing out on
byunghunandyn I’m seriously wondering if they’re together or not
user_ @/byunhunandyn was the caption not clear enough for u?
iconiccuser we’ve all been there girly
user55 @/iconiccuser the strongest of soldier fr
user91 I get this on so many levels
user32 no way. He liked the post as if this wasn’t about him😭
yourusername
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yourusername im someone who forgives and forgets
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user1 STAND UP GIRL
marrymebyunghun who can blame her
byunghunswife @/marrymebyunghun I mean look at him
ynfan we get it dw
user31_ you’ll get out of that phase
ynfan4ever @/user31_ if my bf gave gifts like that I would forgive him without hesitation
user31_ @/ynfan4ever THEYRE NOT EVEN TOGETHER
ynfan4ever @/user31 YOU DONT KNOW THAT
user76 and the crowd is...confused?
byunghun0712
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byunghun0712 cheers 🍻
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user12 guys… she’s following him again
byunghunfan @/user12 NOOOOO
stormshadowsabs leave my man alone
ynsfan @/stormshadowsabs tell him to leave our girl alone
hayyleee raw.
dilfenthusiast let's make love
azeala.aa all 10 fingers
yourusername
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yourusername saw lisa live!!!
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ynfan1 gorgeous
user09 are they together?
randomuser @/user09 yes and no
leahhhh.hhh till the bed breaks
user45 ahhh omg ur a lisa fan!!!
yourusername @/user45 well of course!
fckmeleebyunghun the jealousy im feeling...
yourusername
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yourusername maybe the single life suits me better
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user08 bad bitch
ynfan02 girl what happened now
user34 I’m getting used to this now
byunhunfan this is more entertaining than my life
user12 well what did he do this time
leebyunghunswifey @/user12 why do u assume he’s the problem? Maybe it’s her
ynfanpage @/leebyunghunswifey men are always the problem. you’ll understand that when you’re older
user10 u may have lost ur man but at least ur hot
byunghun0712
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byunghun0712 💪
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yourusername biting my lip
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user75 HIS ARMSSS
user12 now why is @/yourusername in the comments
byunghunswifey @/user12 Frl what are u doing
userr09 @/yourusername is so luckyyy
user98 can she not make up her mind ?
ynfan y’all are taking this too seriously. so what if they’re hooking up?
user23 @/ynfan exactly like they wouldn’t be the first to do so
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producedbysohyun · 4 hours ago
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Protective
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Squid game x reader hcs
Summary: How the squid games characters would be protective over you
Includes: Thanos, In-ho, Gi-hun, Dae-ho, Myung-gi, Hyun-ju (squid game au)
Warnings: mentions of death, might be a little repetitive because I just feel like they would act similar.
Masterlist
a/n: Mb this is pretty short but I haven’t posted in awhile so I wanted to post something (I might add to this as time goes on) !! Please enjoy !!
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Thanos:
Let’s just say that if anyone lays a finger on you, they are dead 🤗
You literally don’t have to worry about dying when you are with him
Always has his arm around your shoulder or waist so everyone knows to not try anything with you
During the night he holds onto you so tightly you feel like you could suffocate
He just really doesn’t want anything to happen to you 😔
If you really don’t want to play the games he will cave and vote X
You mean way more to him than money
No matter how bad his debt is
*cough* 1 billion *cough*
In-ho:
Idk how you would get in the game in the first place cause he definitely wouldn’t let you but
Ya you are not dying
Has full control of the game and will do everything he can to make sure you don’t die
Even if it means playing unfairly
Tells the guards to not kill you even if you didn’t pass the game
Definitely tells the guards to give you extra food so you have energy 😭
You’re basically just gonna be playing the games on easy mode
Gi-hun:
Bro has nothing to lose besides you so he’s gonna do everything he possible can to keep you alive
Doesn’t let you go anywhere alone
Beats himself up about not trying harder to end the games because if he did then neither of you would be in this situation right now
Never sleeps because he knows that fights happen at night and he wants to make sure you’re safe
Would immediately put himself in danger if it meant you would be ok
Makes sure you pass the games before even worrying about himself
Dae-ho:
Does not take his eyes or hands off of you
Is not afraid to defend you either verbally or physically
Even tho he is freaked out about the games as well he doesn’t let it get to him and tells himself he has to be brave for you
Always puts your safety above his
Ends up getting no sleep at night because he’s so scared something is gonna happen to you
Always insists on giving you his food even tho he is hungry
In his mind, you matter more.
Myung-gi:
Wanted to keep playing the games but when he figured out you were there he voted for X as he wanted anything but for you to be dead or hurt
Will literally kill anyone who bad mouths you (that one scene when he killed Thanos because he said something about Jun-hee 🤭 rip Thanos 😞)
Doesn’t let you leave his sight for a second
During the special game where the lights went out and everyone was killing each other he just kept you behind him the entire time
Boy was ready to risk his life for you 😭
If you get separated during a game he will probably scold you out of worry before realizing that he’s literally yelling at you for something you couldn’t control
You better believe he won’t let you get separated from him again
Hyun-ju:
Girl would do absolutely anything to keep you alive
Holds your hand 24/7
You guys are NOT getting separated
Doesn’t care about herself
As long as you’re alive she’s ok
Would absolutely crash out if anything happened to you
If you wanted to join the revolt with them she would tell you no instantly
Because if you ended up dying and it was her fault she would never forgive herself
Can’t sleep because she wants to watch over you pt.2 😢
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a/n: I hope you guys liked this!! I know I say that requests are closed rn but I will take requests for hcs !! Not for a singular character but if it’s for multiple characters I will gladly write it !!
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idkdudethisisntpermanent · 2 days ago
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Over the Limit-pt.vi
jenna ortega x female reader
part i | part ii | part iii | part iv | part v | part vi
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summary: Sibling fights, pool parties, and drunk college kids. What could go wrong?
word count: 11.4k
warnings: drinking, mentions of drug use, implications of sexual assault (does not happen)
a/n: My plans for this chapter changed a lot from any q&a’s I’ve answered….Thank you for being patient! Hope you enjoy😌 If anyone is in LA or has loved ones there I hope you’re all safe 💜
————
“So what’s his name?”
Hunter turns to you with a raised brow, “Are we really doing this?”
After Aliyah’s suggestion—that was more an order to go to UCLA, you found yourself driving to the acclaimed university. You check the rear view mirror and confirm that the two sisters are knocked out (as it’s now 9pm) before you answer Hunter.
“Well yeah? You know about my Viper situation brewing back there,” you roll your eyes with a laugh quoting his exact words from earlier. “Come onnn!” you whine.
“Oh so you do admit there’s a situation,” Hunter fires back, clearly trying to regain the upper hand. But you hold your ground, unfazed by his teasing—a skill you’ve definitely honed over the course of this road trip. He groans but you can see the blush creeping on his face at the mention of his forbidden lover. “Fine his name is Fielder.”
“Hmm weird name. So you guys dating or is it just sex?” you say getting straight to the point.
“Dude!”
“What! I saw the toothbrush in your bathroom,” you smile. “I’m happy for you man. If you want to be with him or whatever.”
“I-I don’t know," he hesitates. "I really like him, but he’s a Viper and you know what that means."
You glance at him, then take one hand off the wheel to give his shoulder a firm squeeze. “Time to take your own advice, buddy,” you say, your voice steady. “Remember what you told me back then?
‘That’s half the thrill.’
‘When have you ever avoided doing something just because it’s not allowed?’
Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten your own words of wisdom.”
Hunter exhales, a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. “Yeah, yeah, I remember,” he mumbles, but you can see the gears turning in his head.
"Dating is different when you get older," he shares after a moment of silence. "You don't really want to mess around with the forbidden just for the fuck of it. It's like the real deal now," he sighs. "Have your fun while you can, because it doesn't last forever."
You take a moment to really absorb Hunter's words. Was he implying that Jenna was just a phase in your life? Something forbidden you were testing out for the thrill of it? You’re almost certain he didn’t mean it that way, but you hate that he planted the thought in your head. Because you knew for a fact that you never saw Jenna as a fleeting moment. An act of rebellion or someone to mess around with.
The thought shakes you, and the weight of your emotions for the girl asleep in the backseat begins to sink in. It terrifies you—realizing just how much she truly means to you.
You weren’t in the mood for a deep, philosophical conversation right now, so you deflected with some light banter instead. “You’re not that much older than me, what—four, five years tops?”
“Eight,” Hunter deadpans, followed by a dry laugh. “And here I am, heading to a college town to party like I’m still eighteen,” he mutters, shaking his head in mock disbelief.
"Whoa party? Who said anything about partying?" you ask confused.
"Come on, you can't expect us to go to UCLA for the weekend—mind you exam season just finished. And you don't want us to party?"
"There is possibly a drug cartel hunting us down...and you want to party?"
"Yup," he answers, popping the P with an unbothered grin.
————
"Please tell me we're there," Aliyah yawns, stretching her arms out above her. "I can't stand another moment in this car."
"Technically it's an SUV," you mutter under your breath, earning a tired glare from the backseat. "But yeah, we’re almost there. Where am I headed?"
"Hold on let me text Markus real quick."
Again with that name. Before you could flip your mind over wondering who this guy was, you hear Jenna stir in the backseat, her voice groggy as she asked Aliyah, "how long was I out?"
Okay new obsession: Jenna's tired voice. It made your heart do a little flip.
Hunter looks over at you and he rolls his eyes. Why you still deny the fact that you have feelings for this girl is beyond him. He wanted to smack you across the face and ask you if you thought it was normal to get worked up over someone's sleepy voice. It was evident in the way your eyebrows jumped and the stupid smile on your lips. You obviously had feelings for the girl and everyone but you and Jenna could see it.
"Okay Y/n go to 350 De Neve drive," Aliyah shares upon getting the address.
You still had no idea where you were going, but you give a nod to Hunter to put in the address the girl gave.
Finally, not being able to stand it anymore, you ask the question that's been annoying you for the last two hours. "Who's Markus?"
“Our brother,” Jenna answers, glancing up at the rearview mirror where your eyes have been lingering throughout the whole drive.
Her sleepy voice almost distracted you from what she just said. Oh. That explains a lot. Silly old you getting jealous over nothing. Markus was their damn brother. You smile and nod. "Ahh okay, I see."
"What's with the smile Y/l/n?" Hunter teases you, knowing exactly why.
You don't respond and shoot him a side eye. "So is this a younger or older brother?"
"He's my twin," Aliyah mumbles, her attention stolen by something on her phone.
That didn't answer your question. But you still decide to engage in some small talk with Jenna just because you can, and totally not because you wanted to hear more of her tired voice.
"So are you the youngest Jenna?"
This time, Aliyah takes her eyes off her phone and bursts out laughing.
"Pffft—please! I’m dead!" she howls, clearly finding your question hilarious.
"Am I the youngest?" Jenna bites back, her tired voice now laced with a touch of sass. The combination is absolutely killer, and for a split second, you forget how to breathe. But your brain catches up quickly, and you realize you might have more pressing issues to worry about.
"Have you thought all this time that Aliyah is older than me?" she adds, her eyes narrowing playfully at the rearview mirror.
You blink, caught off guard by the sudden shift in tone. “Wait, what? I—uhh—well, yeah, kind of?” You try to backpedal, feeling your face flush slightly. "I mean, she seems older."
Aliyah bursts into laughter again, practically doubling over in the back seat. "Oh my god, I can't believe you thought that! You really think I'm the older one?"
Jenna shakes her head, a small smile tugging at her lips. "Nope. I’m their older sister."
Your eyes widen, and you glance over at Jenna, who looks far too small to be the older sibling. “But… you’re so tiny?” you blurt out before you can stop yourself.
Jenna raises an eyebrow, her tired eyes turning into what you think is an amused glare. "Excuse me? Tiny?"
You instantly regret your words, feeling heat rise to your cheeks. “I mean, you’re just… small compared to Aliyah! I thought she was the older one.”
It was now Hunter's turn to place a hand on your shoulder. "Please shut up before she starts ignoring you again."
————
“Marki-poo!” Aliyah coos running towards a guy that stood quite taller than her with dark hair.
It was around half past nine when you all finally arrived at what you now learned to be Markus’ dorm building.
While the sisters reunited with their brother, you and Hunter climbed out of the SUV that was parked on the road, both of you stretching to shake off the stiffness of hours on the freeway. The cool night air was refreshing, but your attention quickly drifted to Markus. As your eyes flicked toward him, you froze mid-stretch.
Holy shit. He was the spitting image of Jenna. Same piercing eyes, same sharp jawline, and even a similar smile. It was uncanny, and for a moment, you felt like the universe was playing some cosmic joke, doubling down on how much one family could mess with your head.
Before you could ruminate further, Markus noticed you and Hunter lingering by the SUV and waved. His grin widened as he called out, “Hey! You must be Y/n and Hunter. Aliyah and Jenna wouldn’t shut up about you guys over text.”
Aliyah rolled her eyes, while Jenna shot him a wide glare.
You blinked, caught off guard by his friendly tone. “Uh, yeah, that’s us,” you replied, trying to sound casual as you walked over.
“I bet you must love the freedom being away from home," Jenna asks out of the blue while she gazes around the campus mindlessly soaking everything in.
Her voice drew your gaze like a magnet, and for a split second, you forgot anyone else was there.
What was going on with you? Why was her voice making you feel all strange? It wasn't like this before, and even if it was you were at least able to hide it.
Hunter cleared his throat, clearly enjoying your inability to stay cool around Jenna.
“So, what’s the plan?” Hunter asked, breaking the tension.
Markus gestured toward the dorm building. “I’ve got room for all of you to crash if you’re staying the night. It’s a bit of a squeeze, but it beats sleeping in the car.”
Aliyah clapped her hands together, grinning. “Perfect! Let’s get inside. I need to pee, and I’m not doing it in some random gas station bathroom.”
As everyone started heading toward the entrance with their packed bags, Jenna fell into step beside you. Her shoulder brushed yours, and even though it was likely unintentional, it sent your heart racing.
“Thanks for bringing us here,” she said quietly, her voice soft but sincere. “I know this whole trip is a lot. But we haven’t seen Markus in forever.”
You glanced at her, momentarily caught off guard by the genuine gratitude in her tone. “It not that bad,” you replied, trying to sound nonchalant. “Besides, it’s not like I had much of a choice.”
Jenna smirked, the corners of her lips tugging upward in a way that made your chest tighten. “Fair enough.”
As the group disappeared through the dorm’s entrance, you couldn’t shake the feeling that this night was far from over—and that Markus wasn’t the only surprise waiting for you at UCLA.
————
"We need to set them up."
The group makes their trek to Markus' dorm, with the twins up at front, Hunter following in the middle, and Jenna and you walking side by side in the back.
Aliyah decides that she needs to take the reigns for this weekend and enlist her brother's help for something that needs to be done.
"Jenna and Y/n?" He asks, turning back to look at you both.
"—Don't look at them!" she snaps slapping her brother on the arm. "You can't make it obvious."
Markus just looks at her dumbfounded.
“Those two are so into each other, it’s painful to watch. They need to just make out already or something! I’m losing my mind over here.”
“Make out?” Markus repeats, his voice incredulous.
“Yes! Or, like, hold hands—anything! I’m sick of the constant eye-fucking!” she whisper-yells, gesturing dramatically.
“Eye-fucking?”
“Yes, Markus, eye-fucking!” Aliyah says, her tone exasperated as if explaining basic math to a toddler. “Now, what can we do to speed this along? How do college kids even date these days?”
"Uhm I don't know...they meet in class, ask for their snap, or they meet at parties—"
"That's it!" Aliyah shrieks in excitement before she quickly clasps her hand over her mouth, worried she was too loud. "Please tell me there's a party going on tonight?"
"Tonight?" Markus whispers back. "Come on sis, don't you think we should let them relax or something? We can figure this out tomorrow."
"Tonight Markus." She repeats sternly. Markus knew better than to defy his persistent sister. He sighs, "Yeah I know of one."
"Perfect!”
————
"Absolutely the fuck not Aliyah! Are you crazy?!"
The group finally made it to the dorm in one piece, and much to your relief, the tuition prices definitely matched the size of the dorms. It seemed like there was enough space for all five of you, and the best part? Markus had no roommate. Score.
After Aliyah rushes in to use the bathroom, you follow suit, eager to freshen up. You can hear a bit of commotion from the room—the sounds of people getting settled in, and some oddly loud talking—but you think nothing of it. That is, until you step out of the bathroom to the unmistakable sound of shouting.
You freeze.
Jenna and Aliyah are going at it, voices raised and words flying in a heated argument. Whatever was happening, it was definitely not a friendly sibling exchange.
"Oh my god," the younger sister drawls, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "It's just a party, why not?"
You remain at the door, not daring to take a step forward. Your eyes turn to Jenna, waiting for her response. Her eyebrow twitches and she suddenly smiles, but there's no humour behind it. "Why not?"
"Why not, Aliyah?" she responds, her voice dangerously calm. "Why not?"
She takes a step forward, her tone growing colder, sharper.
"Just because—"
Just because what?" Jenna interrupts. "Just because I’m the one who had to step up and pull you out of that mess?"
You notice Aliyah's deameanour slightly falter. Her lips slightly frowning.
"You think I like this shit? You wanna make the same mistakes again, just because you want to go to some stupid college party!" Jenna continues.
You, Markus, and Hunter exchange nervous glances, unsure of when to intervene without getting caught in the crossfire.
"I didn’t ask you to do that for me!" Aliyah finally gets out, her voice rising with defiance.
Jenna’s expression hardens, her words cutting through the air like a knife.
"Yeah, you’re right. You didn’t. But Dad did," Jenna spits the words out, her voice growing more heated with every syllable. "And I had no choice but to put my life on hold and pick up the pieces of your mess. So don’t act like it’s nothing. Don’t you dare act like I’m overreacting, Aliyah. You think I want to keep doing this? You think I want to keep cleaning up after you?"
Holy shit, how much did you miss while in the bathroom? Everything was fine just a few moments ago, how things escalated so fast baffled you.
"Fuck you," Aliyah spits out, her voice trembling as her glossy eyes reflect the anger and hurt beneath the surface. She storms past you, brushing your shoulder, and disappears out of the dorm room before anyone can stop her.
As you’re left standing awkwardly near the door, your eyes instinctively flick to Jenna, who’s still fuming, her chest rising and falling with each sharp breath. She looks like she’s barely holding it together.
But before you can even think about what to do, you notice Hunter and Markus already moving toward her. Hunter places a tentative hand on Jenna’s shoulder, his voice soft as he tries to calm her down. Markus, standing nearby, looks just as lost for words but ready to step in if needed.
Your gaze lingers on Jenna for a moment longer, watching the tension in her jaw and the way she refuses to let her emotions fully break through. Part of you wants to stay, to say something, to comfort her—but it’s clear she’s not alone. Hunter and Markus are already there for her.
The decision was obvious. With a deep breath, you step out into the hallway, following after Aliyah.
You can still hear the muffled voices of Hunter and Markus trying to talk Jenna down as you close the door behind you, leaving the tension of the dorm room behind. But even as you head down the hall, your mind keeps replaying Jenna’s words, the raw emotion in her voice, and the hurt etched into Aliyah’s face.
You sigh, shaking your head. This weekend’s already off to one hell of a start.
————
"Holy shit Aliyah! Slow down would you!" you shout after her as you see her enter the elevator.
You barely make it in time before the doors shut and you're panting while the girl remains silent, as you both wait for the elevator to reach the ground floor.
Neither of you say anything. She walks on the side walk away from the building and you follow a step behind her. There were other students out at this time, it wasn't too late—only around 10pm now. After some more aimless walking she finally plops down on a bench under a streetlight.
You linger for a moment before cautiously sitting down beside her, keeping a bit of space between you. She says nothing, and for a while, you both just sit there, the faint buzz of campus life in the background.
Finally, you break the silence. "Aliyah… you okay?"
She scoffs, wiping at her eyes quickly. "Do I look okay?" Her voice is sharp, but there’s no real venom behind it.
You don’t answer right away, watching her instead. "No," you admit softly. "You don’t. But… do you want to talk about it?"
You hear her sniffle and you turn to face her. She's wiping her eyes now with a sad smile on her face. "I don't even know why I'm crying, she's not wrong you know?"
"I doubt that's true," you offer gently. "She's just worried of losing you. Or seeing you make choices that could...you know, hurt you," you suggest, recalling the information you heard in the argument earlier.
"She didn’t say anything I didn’t already know. But hearing her say it—it hurts. She didn’t have to throw that in my face."
You nod slowly, understanding dawning. "You mean about the Vipers?"
Her head snaps toward you, eyes narrowing. "She told you?"
"No," you say quickly, raising your hands in defense. "She didn’t. That’s her story to tell, and I guess she’ll tell me when she’s ready. But… it’s not hard to figure out that there’s more to this than just a party."
The crying girl clears her throat before leaning back into the bench. “She could’ve told you. She probably didn’t tell you for my sake.”
You tilt your head confused, giving Aliyah your full attention.
“You’ll have to know this anyways if you’re going to date my sister and shut up I don’t wanna hear it. Let me explain.”
You laugh at her comment. How she knew you’d deny potentially dating her sister. But sensing the seriousness of the topic you zip your lips and listen, waiting for your long awaited questions to be answered.
“I’m sure you’ve gathered by now that Jenna is with the Vipers because of me.”
You softly nod.
“A few years ago,” she sighs recalling the night.
————
Aliyah was buzzing, the world around her a kaleidoscope of music, neon lights, and laughter. The bass thumped through her veins as she swayed to the beat, a red plastic cup in her hand. She wasn’t entirely sure what was in it—something strong, something that burned on the way down. Her "friends" had handed it to her earlier with a wink and a “just try it.”
It wasn’t her first party, but it was her first big one. College kids, flashy cars parked outside, and a house way too nice for a bunch of teenagers to be trashing. Percy had been the one to invite her, his charming smile making it seem like she’d be missing out on the event of the year if she didn’t show up.
“Aliyah!” Percy’s voice cut through the music. She turned, almost stumbling as the alcohol hit her harder than expected. He stood there, grinning, a bottle of something expensive-looking in one hand. “Having fun?”
“Yeah!” she replied, her words slightly slurred.
“Good, good,” he said, slinging an arm around her shoulder and steering her toward a quieter corner of the house. “Hey, you gotta try this.”
Aliyah blinked at the small pill he held out to her. “What is it?”
“Just something to help you relax,” he said, his voice smooth and reassuring. “Everyone’s doing it. No big deal.”
Normally, she would’ve said no. Normally, she wouldn’t have even been at a party like this. But the alcohol dulled her judgment, and Percy’s grin made it seem harmless. She hesitated for only a moment before taking the pill and swallowing it with a sip from her cup.
The next few hours were a blur. Colors seemed brighter, music louder, and her body lighter. She laughed at things that weren’t funny and danced until her legs felt like jelly. At some point, Percy led her upstairs, saying she needed to “rest.” She remembered collapsing onto a plush bed, her head spinning, and Percy’s shadow lingering in the doorway.
When she woke up the next morning, her phone was buzzing with texts from Jenna. But it was Percy’s smirk and the way he casually mentioned “having some footage�� of her wild night that made her stomach drop.
“You wouldn’t want your dad seeing this, would you?” he’d said with a mockingly sweet tone.
That night changed everything.
————
"Hold on—did that asshole fucking—" you begin to demand, your voice low but trembling with barely contained fury. Your fists clench instinctively, already mapping out how you were gonna beat Percy's ass.
"No! No," she insists, her voice steadying as she places a hand on your arm, as if to keep you tethered. "Thank God, no. But..." Her gaze drops to the ground, shame flickering across her face. "Turns out it was a Viper party, he had footage of me taking whatever it was he gave me. And—" She swallows hard, her voice barely above a whisper, "he planted stuff on me too. Drugs. Enough to ruin everything if anyone found out."
The weight of her words sinks in, and your anger twists into something darker—colder. "That slimy, manipulative piece of shit," you mutter, pacing a few steps away before turning back to her. "He set you up."
Aliyah nods, hugging her arms to herself as if trying to shield herself from the memory.
"Sorry if this comes of rather insensitive but rich kid doing drugs doesn't really strike me as a headline. You see that shit everyday. Would it really have ruined everything?"
"My Dad's a dick. He didn't want it effecting his company. And unfortunately in his world it's a big deal." She pauses before continuing, "Percy just wanted leverage. Something to use against Dad." Her voice breaks, and she exhales shakily. "Dad handled it, but..."
"But that’s when Jenna got pulled into this mess," you finish for her, the realization hitting like a freight train.
Aliyah nods again, her eyes glassy. "Yeah. Dad made her join the Vipers to keep an eye on Percy and make sure he kept his word. But it wasn’t just that." She hesitates, biting her lip before continuing. "Jenna found out Percy made her joining the crew part of his deal. Like he wanted to make sure he had control over us both. And Dad said yes without hesitation."
The depth of Percy’s manipulation and the selfishness of the girls' father makes your stomach churn. You no longer felt any guilt for stealing that assholes car.
"And Jenna agreed?" you ask quietly, already knowing the answer.
"She didn’t have a choice," Aliyah whispers, her voice cracking. "Dad wouldn’t let me take the fall, and Jenna...she’s too loyal. She put herself in the line of fire for me."
You sink onto the bench beside her, running a hand through your hair as the weight of it all settles in. "Aliyah...this isn’t your fault," you say softly, though you’re not sure if you’re convincing her or yourself.
"It feels like it is," she murmurs, staring at her hands. "If I hadn’t been so stupid that night—"
"Stop." Your tone is firm but gentle. "Percy’s the one who’s to blame here. He’s the asshole who exploited you and dragged Jenna into this mess. Not you."
She doesn’t respond, but the way her shoulders shake tells you she’s trying to hold back tears. You reach out, hesitating for a moment before placing a comforting hand on her shoulder. "We’ll figure this out, Aliyah. We have the leverage we need. We’ll get Jenna out of this. I promise."
For the first time since the argument, she looks at you, her eyes glistening with vulnerability. "You mean that?"
"More than anything."
The two of you sit in silence after the night’s heavy revelations. It’s not awkward—if anything, it feels like the silence is exactly what you both need. As you sit on the bench, you watch students pass by in the soft glow of the campus lights. Some walk alone, weighed down by heavy backpacks and heavier thoughts. Others are carefree, laughing and chatting with friends, their steps light as air. A few move with quiet confidence, calm and steady.
You wonder, not for the first time, what your life might have been like if you hadn’t been born in Brimstone. Would you have been one of these students? What version of you would have existed here, unburdened by everything that came with your hometown?
“I guess…I can see why your sister was upset,” you say finally, breaking the silence.
Aliyah doesn’t respond right away, but she nods, the motion just visible from the corner of your eye.
“But,” you add with a small smile, “that was two years ago. You deserve another chance.” You turn to her, flashing a grin. “And besides, you’ve got me, Hunter, and Markus watching your back now.” You flex your arms dramatically. “No idea about those two, but nothing gets past me.”
She snorts, a laugh bubbling up despite herself. “Please, put those away. You’re going to embarrass us both.”
Her laughter softens, and when she turns to you, there’s a seriousness in her expression that catches you off guard. “I really hope it works out between you and my sister,” she says quietly.
The words hit you harder than you expect, leaving you momentarily speechless. It’s still complicated—still messy. But something about Aliyah’s vulnerability tonight makes it easier to let the thought cross your mind, even if you can’t voice it aloud.
For now, you settle for the truth that feels safest to admit, even if only to yourself.
I hope so too.
————
You’re greeted by the sight of the Ortega sisters wrapped in a tight embrace near the curb. Their voices are low, but the murmured apologies and soft laughter carry in the quiet night.
Jenna’s voice breaks through, her tone unusually tender. “No, I should’ve given you a chance. I didn’t have to be so mean, Aliyah. I’m sorry.”
Aliyah sniffles, her own voice equally apologetic. “I was wrong too. I should’ve listened to you. You’re just trying to look out for me.”
The rest of you—Hunter, Markus, and yourself—watch the heartwarming spectacle from the bench you were on moments ago with Aliyah. You exchange incredulous looks, eyebrows raised in unison.
“They’re hugging,” you point out, still processing.
“Like…full-on hugging,” Markus adds, as if needing confirmation.
Hunter leans back, crossing his arms. “I don’t know what’s more shocking—the fact that they stopped yelling or that they’re acting like this never happened.”
You snort, shaking your head. It’s kind of funny, really, how quickly they’ve gone from shouting to sobbing on each other’s shoulders. You glance at Hunter and Markus, a knowing thought crossing your mind. Just like your talk with Aliyah, it’s clear they must’ve said something to Jenna. Whatever it was, it worked, and you’re quietly grateful for it.
“They’re like a Netflix drama,” Markus muses. “Big fight in episode nine, full reconciliation by episode ten.”
Hunter chuckles. “They’re efficient, I’ll give them that.”
You smile to yourself, watching the sisters. It’s a relief to see them like this, to see the tension replaced with understanding. For all their differences, their bond is unshakable, and tonight, that’s clearer than ever.
“Efficient’s good,” you remark softly. “We could all use a little more of that.”
The three of you fall into a comfortable silence, still seated on the bench, content to let the moment play out. It’s been a long day, but for the first time in hours, it feels like everything might just turn out okay.
Your thoughts drift as the sisters continue to talk, the quiet laughter between them like the perfect breeze after a tense day. The closest you’ve ever had to something like that is Anton. It’s not quite the same—he isn’t your sibling, not by blood anyway, but he’s always been there, filling that role.
And yet, you and Anton aren’t like Jenna and Aliyah. When you two fight, it doesn’t end with quick apologies or mutual understanding. No, you’ve gone days without speaking. Weeks, even. Your disagreements have never been about anything as heavy as the sisters’ fight tonight, but they’ve been passionate all the same—mostly about the club.
You can still hear Anton’s voice in your head during your last big blow-up a few months ago—long before you met Jenna. “You think you’re above this? You think you’re better than the rest of us?” His words had stung, but so had your response. You’d called him reckless, accused him of not understanding your hesitations about racing, about the club, about everything it represented.
Looking back, you know you were both too stubborn to see the other’s perspective. And while things eventually smoothed over—like they always did—you can’t help but wonder if there’s still some lingering tension under the surface, something neither of you has addressed. And ever since that day he jokingly pulled that gun on you, ironically things have been calm. He probably thinks you're establishing yourself in the crew, and you don't know what to tell him.
Watching the sisters now, you feel a pang of envy. They’ve fought, sure, but they’ve also made their way back to each other in a way that feels effortless. You wonder if you and Anton could ever find that same ease, or if the unspoken disagreements between you will always weigh down your bond.
Hunter nudges you out of your thoughts. “You okay over there?”
You nod, shaking off the memory. “Yeah, just thinking.”
“About?”
You glance at the sisters, their shared laughter filling the night air. “How nice it must be to make up that fast,” you say simply.
Markus chimes in. “Don’t get too used to it. This is a rare sight.”
You laugh lightly, but the thought lingers. Maybe, just maybe, you and Anton could find that kind of understanding someday.
The sisters finally break their embrace and walk toward you, their expressions a mix of relief and mischief. Aliyah, ever the wildcard, claps her hands together and grins.
“Well, now that we’re done being dramatic, who’s ready to party?”
You glance at Jenna, who offers a small, almost shy smile, and then at Hunter and Markus. Surprisingly, no one objects. After the emotionally charged evening, maybe letting loose doesn’t sound so bad.
“Alright, let’s do it,” Hunter says, standing and stretching his arms.
As you all head back toward the dorm building, Markus throws a casual comment over his shoulder. “Hope you all packed swimsuits.”
The group collectively freezes, exchanging bewildered glances.
“Swimsuits?” Aliyah asks, narrowing her eyes.
Markus turns to smirk at her. “It’s a pool party. Did I not mention that?”
Your brain short-circuits. A pool party? Swimwear? Holy crap. Jenna in a bikini? You can feel the heat rising to your cheeks, your face turning an embarrassing shade of red.
Oh god, what if she looks over here? you panic internally. Play it cool. Act normal. Breathe.
But the thought of Jenna, all confident and effortlessly beautiful, lounging poolside or—nope, nope, abort mission. You’re pretty sure your gay panic is written all over your face, and you try to busy yourself with looking anywhere but at her.
“Y/n?” Jenna’s voice pulls you from your spiraling thoughts.
You snap your head toward her, your voice coming out a little too loud. “What? Yes! Pool party! Great idea. Love it.”
Jenna raises an eyebrow, clearly amused by your overenthusiasm. “Uh-huh,” she says, her lips quirking into a small smile.
Aliyah gives you a knowing smirk but thankfully doesn’t say anything, and the group continues walking. You tug your shirt over your face, hoping to disappear into it.
————
"Why did you pack so many bikinis?" Jenna asks looking into her sister's duffel bag. 
"I had a feeling that something like this would happen," Aliyah mutters, her full attention on the swim suit she’s holding up in front of her.
The top is a classic triangle style with thin straps that tie around the neck and back, offering a simple yet sultry design. The cups are just enough to leave something to the imagination while perfectly accentuating curves. The bottoms—equally bold.
Jenna's eyes narrow at the sight. "You're wearing that?"
"Nope. You are."
The older Ortega looked at her sister like she just said the most insane words known to man. "What?"
"You heard me. You're wearing it."
Jenna snorts, crossing her arms. "Not in this lifetime."
"Oh, come on!" Aliyah groans, dangling the bikini in front of Jenna like a carrot on a stick. "It’s cute, it’ll look amazing on you, and it’s a pool party. You’ll blend right in."
Jenna glares at her sister, her tone dripping with sarcasm. "Yeah, because nothing says ‘blending in’ like wearing half an outfit."
Aliyah rolls her eyes, unbothered. "You’ll thank me when you’re the center of attention. Besides..." She leans in, lowering her voice just enough to add some drama. "I’m pretty sure a certain someone would love to see you in this."
Jenna’s face flushes instantly. She hated that she actually considered wearing it for a second.
She snatches the bikini from Aliyah’s hand and tosses it on the bed before her sister can say another word. "You’re impossible."
Aliyah beams triumphantly. "You'll be thanking me later."
————
Outside, you finish getting dressed, opting for a simple look. You stick with your black sports bra and borrow a pair of pink swim shorts from Hunter, not giving much thought to your outfit. With a casual shrug, you figure it’s good enough.
As you adjust the waistband of the shorts, Hunter glances down at your stomach, his eyes lingering a beat too long on your toned abs. He smirks and quips, "Someone’s definitely gonna appreciate those."
You roll your eyes, ignoring the comment as your face heats up slightly. Pulling on your zip-up hoodie, you tug it closed halfway, hoping to downplay any attention.
Hunter chuckles softly, clearly amused by your reaction.
Before you can retaliate, Markus strolls over, sighing dramatically as he collapses onto the edge of his bed. He looks at you with exaggerated seriousness, steepling his fingers like some kind of TV detective.
"I think, as a brother, I have to do this," Markus begins, his tone solemn but with a glint of amusement in his eyes. "I’ve always done this with the guys Aliyah’s been into, so it only feels right to extend the same courtesy for Jenna."
Your stomach drops. Oh no. Is this really happening?
Markus straightens, folding his arms like a dad interrogating his daughter’s date. "What are your intentions with my sister?"
You freeze, blinking at him in horror. "What?"
Hunter chuckles, clearly finding this entire situation hilarious as he leans casually against the wall to watch the show.
"You heard me," Markus presses, his expression still annoyingly serious. "Jenna’s my sister. I need to know you’re not playing games. So, what are your intentions?"
You gulp, the words catching in your throat. You glance at Hunter for backup, but he just shrugs with a grin, clearly enjoying your discomfort.
"I…" you start, feeling your face grow hotter by the second. You will yourself to stay calm, refusing to let the teasing get to you. "Jenna’s… she’s important to me. I’m not leading her on, if that’s what you’re worried about."
Markus raises an eyebrow, clearly not satisfied.
Do you have to admit in this very moment that you maybe kind of like his sister...?
You sigh, running a hand through your hair. "Look, I don’t really know where we stand right now, but I care about her—a lot. I wouldn’t do anything to hurt her."
Markus studies you for a moment longer before breaking into a grin. "Okay, that’s acceptable. For now."
"For now?" you echo, incredulous but Markus is already getting up, stretching like he just completed some monumental task.
"Yeah. Just remember, I’ll be watching." He winks at you before heading back to his side of the room.
"What are we watching?" Aliyah's voice suddenly booms, startling you.
You whip your head around at the speed of lightning, and of course your eyes lock onto Jenna's. Thank god she had the same idea as you and wore a jumper over whatever her swim outfit was so you couldn't tell what she was wearing.
Still, your stomach knots. Shit. Did Jenna hear you talking about her?
"Nothing," you mutter to Aliyah, trying to sound casual, though the heat creeping up your neck says otherwise. "Are we ready to go?"
As you glance back at Jenna, you realize she’s watching you intently. Her gaze lingers a little too long, her head tilted ever so slightly, as if she’s piecing something together. You feel your skin flush under her scrutiny, suddenly hyper-aware of her presence.
Then, just as you think you might combust from the tension, a slow, amused smile breaks across her face. Her eyes flick downward, and you follow her gaze to… oh god. The stupidly bright pink shorts Hunter lent you.
"Nice look," Jenna quips, her voice light and teasing.
Your hands instinctively tug at the hem of your hoodie, trying to shield as much of the shorts as possible. "Yeah, well… they’re functional."
"Functional," she echoes, her grin widening. "Sure."
Aliyah raises an eyebrow, looking between the two of you. "Alright, lovebirds," she says, rolling her eyes. "Let’s get going before the party’s over."
As the group starts heading out, you walk ahead, desperate to escape Jenna’s knowing smirk. But you can’t help glancing back just once, catching her still smiling at you, her eyes sparkling with a mix of amusement and something else you can’t quite name.
————
Courtesy of Markus' Uber app, the driver slows to a stop, and you all step out, craning your necks to take in the towering building before you. The sleek glass facade gleams under the city lights, exuding wealth and extravagance.
"Jesus," Hunter breathes, his jaw practically hitting the sidewalk. "Is this a college party or a Kardashian party?"
You find yourself mirroring his wide-eyed expression. "This is… a lot," you mutter.
Markus grins. "Nah, it’s just a kid in my class. He’s cool. His family’s super rich, though."
You nod absently, but the information doesn’t exactly calm your nerves. As you stare at the building, a sudden wave of discomfort washes over you. Will it be obvious that you don’t belong here? The thought crosses your mind and stubbornly lingers, gnawing at the edges of your confidence.
You glance at Hunter, half-expecting him to share your unease, but no—he’s practically bouncing on his toes, his excitement palpable. Of course, he’d thrive in an environment like this.
Before you know it, you’re all piling into the elevator, Aliyah confidently hitting the button for the penthouse. The mirrored walls reflect your group back at you, and you take a steadying breath, trying to shake off the impostor syndrome creeping in.
As the elevator ascends, you feel a gentle tug on your sleeve. You glance down to see Jenna looking up at you, concern etched in her features.
"You okay?" she whispers, her voice soft enough that only you can hear.
You blink, caught off guard. "Huh? Yeah, I’m fine," you reply quickly, though the words feel hollow.
"You’ve been quiet," she presses, her eyes scanning your face. "You were lively during the ride, but now… it’s like you flipped a switch."
Her observation catches you off guard, and for a moment, you’re unsure how to respond. It’s not often someone notices these shifts in you—let alone calls them out.
"I guess I’m just… a little overwhelmed," you admit finally, your voice barely above a whisper.
Jenna’s lips curve into a small, understanding smile. "Don’t worry," she says, her hand brushing against yours briefly in reassurance. "You’re with us. You belong here."
Her words hang in the air as the elevator dings, signaling your arrival at the penthouse. The doors slide open, revealing a lavish space filled with music, laughter, and an intoxicating air of luxury.
You step out, Jenna’s quiet reassurance still echoing in your mind, and try to believe it.
You barely have time to process the fleeting warmth of Jenna’s hand brushing against yours before a guy—presumably the host—beelines toward your group, a wide, sloppy grin plastered on his face.
“Markus! You made it, bro!” he slurs, his sunglasses tilted crookedly on his nose, a solo cup in each hand. One is filled with something neon green, the other an alarming shade of blue, and neither looks remotely safe to drink. You take him in quickly—barefoot, dripping wet, and leaving a sizable puddle in his wake. The guy clearly just climbed out of the massive pool that stretches across the center of the penthouse and doesn’t seem to care one bit about the water ruining the hardwood floors.
While Markus greets him with a laugh and a hearty handshake, you take the opportunity to glance around. The penthouse is sprawling—easily larger than half the homes on your street combined. The walls are painted a deep, moody purple, accented by dim, neon lighting that shifts colors in rhythm with the heavy bass of the music. The furniture screams luxury, from the sleek leather couches to the glass coffee tables littered with half-empty cups, discarded towels, and the occasional misplaced phone.
The centerpiece of the room, though, is undoubtedly the pool. It’s an indoor marvel, its edges lined with glowing tiles that cast an ethereal blue light across the entire space. The water ripples as people dive in or lounge at the edges, drinks in hand. Some are modestly dressed in one-pieces or board shorts, while others push the limits of decency, their swimwear leaving little to the imagination.
The energy in the room is wild, chaotic, and undeniably alluring. You can’t help but feel a little out of place amidst the atmosphere, but there’s also a strange pull to it—a curiosity about what the night might hold.
As Markus continues his lively conversation with the host, Aliyah nudges your arm, drawing your attention. “Anyone catch your attention?" she wiggles her eyebrows while looking around the penthouse.
Thankfully Jenna didn't hear the question and you don't answer. You glance over at Jenna, who’s taking in the chaos with a cool, unreadable expression. She seems completely at ease, as if she’s seen this kind of thing a hundred times before.
Finally, the host turns his attention to the rest of your group, his bleary eyes landing on Jenna. “And who are you?” he slurs, grinning like every rich boy stereotype rolled into one. He awkwardly stacks one solo cup into the other—both already full of whatever questionable concoctions he’s drinking. The liquid sloshes over the sides and onto the floor, and you can’t help but think, Damn, it’s gonna suck for whoever has to clean this up tomorrow.
He adjusts his crooked sunglasses onto his head with one hand and extends the other toward Jenna, clearly expecting her to shake it. Jenna hesitates, her eyes darting to Aliyah for guidance. Aliyah gives her an encouraging nod, but the simple act seems to weigh on her. Finally, after a moment of visible deliberation, Jenna gives the guy’s hand a quick, perfunctory shake, her expression polite but distant.
The host grins wider, clearly undeterred. “Hope you’ve got a swimsuit under that,” he says with a sloppy wink. “Maybe I’ll see you later.”
You stiffen, your jaw clenching as the scene plays out. What the fuck? The guy’s blatant drunkenness is gross enough, but his flirty comment? That’s a whole other level of irritating. You can’t say anything—you don’t have that right—but a twinge of jealousy twists in your chest nonetheless.
Of course something like this was going to happen. How could it not? Jenna was gorgeous, and anyone with eyes could see that. All these drunk college losers were going to shoot their shot, thinking they had a chance with her. The thought makes your blood simmer, but you force yourself to look away, jaw still tight.
Jenna, to her credit, doesn’t react much beyond a slight narrowing of her eyes. She turns back to your group, brushing off the host’s comment as if it were a stray piece of lint on her sleeve.
She turns to look at you and notices the way your jaw is clenched. And she can't help but notice the burning sensation in her chest at the sight. Is this the reaction she had wanted? She should've never let Aliyah get into her head.
"Make her jealous."
Her younger sister had whispered to her before they entered the party.
You breathe out a quiet sigh, your irritation still bubbling under the surface but tempered by the fact that she didn’t seem fazed.
Aliyah nudges you again, her voice low and teasing. “Careful, your face is gonna freeze like that.”
You roll your eyes, the tension easing just slightly. This is fine, you tell yourself. This is just a party.
————
This is not just a party.
The night had started with all five of you sticking together, like a tight-knit squad entering enemy territory. But, predictably, the chaos of the party soon swallowed you up, scattering everyone like confetti. Hunter had found his place in the pool, leading a cannonball competition that echoed with cheers and splashes loud enough to rival the music. Aliyah, ever the social butterfly, was mingling with Markus’ friends—some of whom she seemed to know already, laughing and chatting like this was her natural habitat.
Markus and Jenna claimed a spot poolside, lounging on sleek deck chairs while chatting with a group of partygoers. Probably Markus’ friends, you figured. He looked entirely in his element, gesturing animatedly while Jenna sat beside him, a quiet but magnetic presence.
As for you? Well, you were stationed at the edge of the action, nursing your second cup of the mystery blue fluid. It seemed like the safer option compared to the guy mixing vodka with… was that Mountain Dew? Your self-assigned mission was simple: keep an eye on Aliyah and shoot occasional glances at the girl by the pool.
Okay, maybe more than occasional.
Jenna was wearing a black bikini that was deceptively simple, all clean lines and understated elegance. It wasn’t flashy, but it didn’t need to be. It hugged her in all the right places, the kind of outfit that made her look like she’d walked straight out of a swimwear catalog. You could still feel the lingering heat in your cheeks from when she’d first taken off her jumper.
————
She had casually peeled it off as if it were no big deal—just another layer to shed in the heat of the party. But for you? It was a moment. One second, she was her usual, effortlessly cool self in the oversized jumper, and the next, she was standing there in that bikini, and your brain just… short-circuited.
Your first thought: Oh my god, she’s gorgeous. Your second thought: No, wait, she’s always been gorgeous. Your third thought: Holy crap, I’m staring.
Hunter, of course, had noticed your reaction because he never missed an opportunity to tease. He leaned over with a smirk and whispered, “Careful, you’re gonna burn a hole through her with that look.”
You’d snapped out of it with a flustered, “Shut up,” but it was too late. The damage was done. You were blushing so hard, you were sure your face could have powered the penthouse lights.
————
Now, as you stood there, gripping your cup like a lifeline, your eyes kept drifting back to Jenna. The soft glow from the pool lights made her skin look impossibly smooth, her hair falling over one shoulder in loose waves.
You told yourself to look away—to focus on something, anything else—but it was impossible. She was mesmerizing in a way that made the rest of the party blur into the background.
Your drink was halfway to your lips when you realized you hadn’t blinked in a while. Get it together, you scolded yourself, tearing your gaze away with a sharp breath.
But even as you tried to distract yourself, the truth was unavoidable: Jenna Ortega in a bikini—scratch that. Jenna Ortega was your kryptonite.
————
You can’t take your eyes off her.
You tell yourself it’s because you’re keeping an eye out, making sure no one bothers her, but the truth is, you’re mesmerized. She looks so comfortable, so effortlessly beautiful, and it’s infuriating how easy she makes it all seem.
“Enjoying the view?”
You nearly choke on air and whip your head to the side to see Aliyah standing there, a sly grin on her face.
“I—what?” you stammer, heat rushing to your face.
"I’ve seen you looking over there about fifty times in the last ten minutes."
You stiffened, immediately defensive. "I have not."
Aliyah raised an eyebrow, her smirk betraying just how much she was enjoying this. "Uh-huh. Sure. So, you’re not staring at my sister like she’s the eighth wonder of the world?"
She laughs. “Relax, I’m just messing with you.” She leans in closer, lowering her voice. “But seriously, you need to tell her. How long are you going to keep dancing around? And not like you’re not exactly subtle either.”
You glare at her, but the effect is ruined by the fact that your face is probably as red as the solo cup in your hand. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Sure you don’t.” She straightens up, her grin widening.
”Are you drinking tonight?” You ask her, changing the topic but also wanting to know the state of her so you can protect her as needed.
“Nope. It’s a sober night. Don’t worry about me and go get your girl before someone else does,” she urges.
Aliyah added, her tone lighter now, "if you do decide to shoot your shot, maybe don’t wait too long. She’s got options, you know."
You groan, taking another swig from your drink. The thought of Jenna with someone else is burning you.
“Anyway, I’m heading to the pool. Try not to stare too hard.”
She saunters off, leaving you standing there, flustered and annoyed but mostly just embarrassed. You glance back at Jenna, who’s now leaning back on her arms, her head tilted toward the ceiling.
You sigh and take a sip of your drink, the bitterness doing little to distract you from the whirlwind in your chest.
This is not just a party, you think again. This is torture.
————
As you leaned against the railing, sipping on your third drink of the night and trying to push Aliyah's words to the back of your mind, the host stumbled up to you, a wide, sloppy grin plastered across his face. He was holding a vape pen, which he took a long drag from before exhaling a cloud of vapor that smelled faintly of mango.
"Hey, my friennnd!" he slurred, swaying slightly as he leaned in closer than necessary. "You not havin’ a good time or what? You’re just… standing here."
You sighed, already exasperated. "I’m fine, thanks."
He squinted at you like he didn’t believe a word of it, then followed your line of sight toward the pool. His eyes lit up in drunken revelation. "Ahhh! I see what this is!" He laughed loudly and gave you a hearty slap on the back that almost made you spill your drink. "You’ve got eyes for the girl, huh?"
You stiffened, your face heating up. "I don’t know what you’re talking about."
"Sure, sure," he said, waving you off with a laugh. "You’re just standing here, gripping the shit out of that drink, sneaking glances at her like a lovesick puppy because you hate her."
You rolled your eyes, trying to brush him off, but he wasn’t done. "You should go talk to her! Make your move, my dude. Life’s short, and she’s…" He gestured vaguely toward Jenna, nearly knocking himself off balance in the process. "She’s worth it, you know?"
The sincerity in his drunken tone threw you for a loop. You frowned, crossing your arms. "Weren’t you flirting with her earlier?"
He blinked at you, then laughed like you’d just told the funniest joke in the world. "Oh, that? Dude, I flirt with everyone here. It’s, like, my whole thing. Keeps the vibe alive, you know?"
You stared at him, unsure whether to be annoyed or amused. "So, what? None of it’s serious?"
He shrugged, leaning heavily against the railing beside you. "Sometimes it is. Sometimes it’s not. Most of the time, it’s just… me trying to connect. I mean, isn’t that what we’re all doing? Trying to feel something?"
His words hit harder than you expected, and you found yourself looking at him in a new light. Despite his slurred speech and drunken antics, there was something oddly profound about what he’d just said.
"So… what are you trying to feel?" you asked before you could stop yourself.
He let out a long sigh, his grin fading slightly. "Dunno, man. Something real, I guess. You ever feel like you’re just… floating? Like, you’re surrounded by people, but none of it feels solid? So you do stupid stuff—throw parties, flirt with strangers—just to remind yourself you’re alive?"
You stared at him, taken aback by the sudden vulnerability.
This was the last thing you were expecting tonight.
"Yeah," you admitted quietly. "I think I get that."
He looked at you, his expression surprisingly sober for a moment. "Then you get why you shouldn’t waste time. If you feel something—really feel something—you gotta go for it. Otherwise, what’s the point?"
You glanced back toward the pool, where Jenna was laughing at something Markus said, her eyes crinkling at the corners in that way that made your heart stutter.
“And if you don’t wanna take that chance. And want to take the easy way out. I’ll show you how to party,” he smirks gesturing to the end of the drinks table where three girls who you hadn’t noticed earlier were very obviously checking you out.
“I feel like kissing that guy over there,” he randomly announced. “Ciao!”
Maybe the drunk host had a point. And you made your choice.
————
The last month had been an avalanche of unsolicited advice.
Anton had urged you to chase what you want. Your mom stressed staying safe and doing what’s necessary. Hunter and Aliyah kept nudging you to address whatever was going on with Jenna.
And yet, you’d done nothing. Every word of wisdom rolled off you like water off a duck’s back. That’s what made it so damn funny that a drunk party host, of all people, was the one to finally light a fire under you.
Half the room was chasing something—a feeling. The same feeling that teens, young adults, and even grown adults spent their lives chasing. Butterflies, knots, secret glances, the kind of love that makes your heart race and your world slow down. Some people would do anything to find it. Others would do anything to forget it. But not everyone gets it.
What hit you was this: half the room was drowning their emptiness in alcohol, filling voids they didn’t know how to name. You, though? You didn’t have to fill that void. Because you already had what they were searching for.
And that was why, with a newfound determination, you started walking toward Markus, Aliyah, and Jenna by the pool.
You rehearsed what you might say in your head. You doubted you had the guts to blurt out a bold “I like you”—not even after three cups of that mystery blue drink. Sure, the booze helped take the edge off your nerves, but it wasn’t strong enough to make you reckless. Nothing at this party was as potent as Sinner’s jungle juice from back home.
Maybe you’d start small: “You look beautiful tonight.” Yeah, that could work. It was a start.
One way or another, Jenna was going to leave this party knowing how you felt about her.
The closer you got, the more you shook off your nerves. You watched Aliyah, now in the pool and leaning on the edge, whisper something in Jenna’s ear. You didn’t think much of it. The party was deafening, so whispering—or yelling—was the only way anyone could be heard.
But as you closed the gap, you saw Jenna turn her attention from Aliyah to the guy next to her. He was already looking at her, and whatever he’d said made her laugh—a real, full-bodied laugh. She even reached out and playfully slapped his arm.
What the hell?
You tried to brush it off. It was just a party. A nervous habit, maybe. It didn’t mean anything.
But then she did it again. The laugh was softer this time, more intimate. The playful arm slap turned into a lingering touch.
And this time, it wasn’t so easy to dismiss.
Jenna rises onto her tiptoes, leaning closer to the guy beside her. Whatever she whispers in his ear makes him nod, a smug grin stretching across his face. He hoists himself up onto the pool’s ledge with ease, droplets of water glistening on his skin in the dim party lights. Then, extending a hand, he helps Jenna out of the pool as well.
You stand frozen, watching as they make their way around the pool—not toward you, but on the opposite side. Hand in hand, they head for the dance floor.
Your stomach knots. Your feet feel glued to the ground, and you can only stand there, watching in disbelief as they disappear into the crowd.
You could see how the guy takes in the sights of her in that swim suit and it made you seethe with anger.
Aliyah scans the room, her gaze drifting over the pulsating crowd of partygoers. She spots you across the pool, standing stiffly, your eyes locked on Jenna like she’s the only person in the room. The intensity of your stare isn’t lost on her.
Her brow furrows, and she mouths a quiet, “Oh.”
“What’s up?” Markus asks, turning to her with a confused expression.
Aliyah hesitates before answering, her voice low, almost guilty. “I think I messed up.”
Aliyah’s stomach twists as she recalls her own words to Jenna earlier: “Go with the flow; it might cause someone to spring into action.”
Markus turns to her, confused. “What’re you talking about?”
Aliyah nods in your direction. “Look at her.”
Markus follows her gaze and immediately notices you, frozen and visibly fuming, your emotions written all over your face. He lets out a low whistle. “Oof. Yeah, that doesn’t look good.”
Aliyah shakes her head, already looking around. “We need to find Hunter. I don’t see this ending well if we don’t intervene.”
Markus groans, but he’s already following her lead. “Great. Another party, another disaster.”
————
Just minutes ago, you’d felt almost enlightened, convinced you were nothing like the crowd around you—certain you weren’t chasing the same empty void so many here seemed desperate to fill.
But now? Now you felt ridiculous. Pissed. And maybe that mystery blue drink had hit harder than you realized, because suddenly, you were stalking through the crowd, determined to find the host.
He wasn’t hard to spot. Sure enough, he’d achieved his goal, currently locked in a passionate kiss with the guy he’d been eyeing earlier.
Thankfully, he noticed you approaching just in time and broke away, grinning lazily.
You stopped in front of him, your frustration bubbling over. “Show me how to have a good time.”
The host’s grin faltered the moment he registered your expression. For someone as drunk as he was, it was almost impressive how quickly his disappointment flickered across his face. He sighed, his shoulders slumping slightly, as if he’d hoped you wouldn’t end up here, fuming and frustrated.
But he nodded, brushing off the moment with a shrug and an exaggerated stumble in your direction. “Alright, alright,” he slurred, gesturing for you to follow him, leaving the guy he was making out with stranded for your sake. “Come on, let’s fix that mood of yours.”
He weaved his way back toward the drinks table, unsteady on his feet but somehow managing to avoid a complete wipeout. You followed reluctantly, your anger simmering beneath the surface as he gestured toward the end of the drinks table. The trio of girls you hadn’t noticed earlier perked up immediately, their eyes lighting up when they spotted you.
"First, we need to get you absolutely zonked!” the host cheers, thrusting a cup of that ominous green liquid into your hand.
You hesitate, staring at the swirling contents as if they might hold all the answers—or at least some of the regrets you’d rather avoid. Still, you take a sip, and the potent concoction hits you almost immediately. It’s stronger than the blue drink, and you know one thing for sure, you don’t want to get so wasted that you do something irreparably stupid at a party full of strangers. One drink, you decide. That’s your limit.
The host, however, is in full swing. “Alright! Step one done. Now, we find you a girl. The goal’s to make your gal jealous, right?”
You don’t say anything, your silence speaking volumes. He glances back at the dance floor, where Jenna’s still twirling and laughing with the guy. “Yeah, I’ll take that as a yes. She’s dancing with him, so we’re gonna play the same game. Cool?”
Guilt creeps up your spine, making your stomach churn more than the drink. You overthink everything. What would Jenna think? Would this make things worse?
The host seems to sense your hesitation. He snaps his fingers in front of your face. “Hey, stop thinking. You wanted to party, right? This is partying. Just dance and vibe—no strings attached. And bonus, she’ll notice. Maybe even pull a move herself. Cool?”
You still don’t answer, but he barrels on regardless, scanning the room with surprising clarity for someone who’s barely standing upright. His gaze lands on a girl across the room, sipping a drink and watching you with an air of quiet confidence. “I say you go for her,” he says, nodding toward her. “She’s not as desperate as those three over there practically undressing you with their eyes.” He gestures to the trio at the end of the table, but your attention is already locked on the girl he pointed out.
She’s gorgeous. Her sleek black hair falls effortlessly over her shoulders, catching the dim lights in a way that feels almost cinematic. Her lips, painted a deep red, curve into a subtle smirk as her dark hazel, almond-shaped eyes fixate on you. Those eyes… they’re hypnotic, pulling you in like she already knows the effect she’s having on you.
And then she does it—the sticky eyes trick. She looks at you, holds your gaze for a heartbeat longer than necessary, then glances away like she’s already won. It’s deliberate, it’s calculated, and it’s working.
“She’s doing it on purpose,” the host mutters, nudging you forward. “That’s your cue, my friend.”
Your feet move before your brain catches up, guilt and hesitation drowned out by whatever magnetic pull this girl has on you. As you approach, she tilts her head slightly, a single brow arching in challenge. The smirk deepens, and she takes a slow sip of her drink, her eyes never leaving yours now. It’s like she’s daring you to come closer, daring you to make the first move.
And you do.
It all happened so fast. One moment, you were walking across the room, drawn in by her magnetic gaze, and the next, you were standing in front of her. Barely any words were exchanged—just a coy smile and a simple, “Hey, I’m Sofia. Wanna dance?” Before you could even think, you nodded, and now here you are—another pair of bodies swaying in the pulsating rhythm of the music, like the rest of the world had melted away.
Her arms rest comfortably around your shoulders, her touch warm and intimate as if you’ve done this a million times before. Your hands find their place naturally at her waist, and the two of you move in perfect sync, every beat of the music mirrored in your steps. It’s effortless—the way her body follows yours, the way your energy bounces off hers.
But every few seconds, your eyes betray you, glancing over your shoulder to see what Jenna’s up to. And there she is, still dancing with that guy, laughing at something he’s said, her head tilting back just enough to make your stomach twist.
Sofia’s voice pulls you back. “Hmm, are we making that girl jealous?” she teases, her tone light but sharp enough to cut through the haze of your thoughts.
“Maybe,” you admit cautiously, the word barely audible over the music. You brace yourself, worried she’ll be offended that you’re using her for this. But instead, she smirks, her dark eyes glinting with mischief.
“Well,” she murmurs, her lips curving into a playful grin, “we’ll have to do a better job than this.” Without hesitation, she steps closer, closing the already small distance between you. Her body presses softly against yours, her movements slower, more deliberate, the intimacy cranked up just enough to make your pulse quicken.
“She an ex?” Sofia whispers, her breath warm against your ear. The words come out smooth, sultry—designed to sound just loud enough for you to hear.
“No,” you reply, your voice catching slightly. “We’re just... friends?”
Sofia throws her head back, laughing dramatically, the sound exaggerated and almost theatrical. It’s over the top, no doubt meant to draw attention. Jenna’s attention. You’re sure she’s watching now, though you don’t dare look back. Instead, you commit fully to the bit, letting the drinks loosen your inhibitions. The music thrums in your chest, your body moving like the college kid you are—reckless, carefree, and untethered.
For the first time tonight, you let yourself stop thinking. You dance like no one’s watching—though deep down, you know someone is.
————
Hunter, Aliyah, and Markus watched the scene unfold like an audience to the world’s most chaotic soap opera. Their expressions ranged from shock to amusement, with Hunter’s jaw practically on the floor.
“What the fuck did I miss?” he asked, eyes darting between you and your dance partner and Jenna and hers.
“I told Jenna to make Y/n jealous,” Aliyah admitted, her voice tinged with guilt. “And now Y/n is retaliating.”
Hunter let out a low whistle, shaking his head. “This is so not like Y/n, but I kinda like it. That girl is cute.”
Aliyah shot him a sharp glare. “Excuse me? Aren’t we rooting for Jenna and Y/n?”
Hunter snickered. “We are, but relax. This is just the pre-show. They’ll have makeup sex and get over it.”
Aliyah groaned, rolling her eyes. “Seriously? Makeup sex? They—"
Hunter smirked. “Yeah, makeup sex. You know, when they—”
Markus laughs at Hunter’s response.
“I know what it is, weirdo,” Aliyah snapped. “But they’re not there yet. They haven’t even admitted they like each other yet! They need to stop being stubborn and actually talk!”
Hunter leaned back, crossing his arms confidently. “It’ll happen. Look at them—they’re both trying to make each other jealous. This is just foreplay. They’ll be fine as long as neither of them crosses the line. Dancing? Fine. Kissing? That could screw everything up.”
Their attention snapped back to the dance floor as Jenna, spotting you with Sofia, retaliated. She moved even closer to her partner, her hands trailing over his shoulders, their movements far more intimate now.
“Oh no,” Aliyah muttered.
“Oh yes,” Hunter said, grinning. “Now it’s getting good.”
The group leaned forward, watching as you noticed Jenna’s escalation. Without missing a beat, you responded. Sofia seemed to catch on quickly, her body now pressed firmly against yours as you matched Jenna’s energy. The two of you danced as if the rest of the world had disappeared, exchanging subtle glances that grew bolder with every passing moment.
It was a game of one-upmanship now. Jenna would sway closer to her partner, and you’d mirror her, pulling Sofia even closer. Jenna’s hands would glide down her partner’s arms, and Sofia would follow suit with you. Back and forth it went, escalating with each move, the tension between you and Jenna palpable even from across the room.
“Holy shit,” Hunter muttered, his grin widening. “They’re not even pretending anymore.”
“They’re literally staring each other down,” Markus added, incredulous.
It was true. Neither of you was hiding the fact that this was all about the other. Your eyes locked with Jenna’s, an unspoken challenge passing between you as your bodies moved in sync with your respective partners. The music thumped, the crowd blurred, but all that mattered was who would break first.
Sofia's hands slid up your arms and found their way to your shoulders as you danced, her movements effortlessly in sync with yours. Her body pressed closer, her breath warm against your neck, and her fingers trailed lightly down your chest to your exposed abs, pausing there just long enough to send a shiver through you.
You felt her touch, soft but deliberate, and couldn't help but glance over your shoulder.
Jenna was watching.
Her gaze wasn't subtle—it lingered, her lips tightening as her eyes followed Sofia's hands on you. The guy she was dancing with had his hands on her waist, pulling her closer, but Jenna's attention wasn't on him at all. It was on you, her expression a mix of irritation and something else you couldn't quite place.
Then, suddenly, you froze. Breaking away from Sofia.
“What’s happening?” Aliyah whispered, her voice tight with worry.
The trio followed your gaze back to Jenna. She was standing on her tiptoes, leaning in toward her partner, her face inches from his. Her lips parted slightly, as if she were about to—
“Oh no,” Aliyah breathed, clutching Markus’s arm.
The three of them stared, holding their breath, as the moment stretched into eternity.
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jsxjmn · 3 days ago
Text
— I hope she buys you flowers
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pairing: daniela avanzini x fem!reader - megan skiendiel x fem!reader
synopsis: after abandoning you like a lost puppy because she was bored and tired of you, daniela began to realize how much you mean to her.
warning: angst, swearing. men please dni! normal texts is present, small and italic texts are past.
wc: 1.5k
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Daniela’s POV
Sitting here alone at our villa while watching the other girls have fun, and there she is, my girl, or should I say Megan's girl. She used to be mine, mine to keep and mine alone, and now she's someone's girl, and all because I was stupid, so stupid to let her go.
"Dani? Are you coming? Y/N's about to blow her cake," Sophia asked me while applying her sunscreen.
my hearts breaks a little when i hear your name~
‘Y/N Isabel Laforteza my leader’s baby sister’
"Uhm, no, I'll probably go to my room; my head's kinda heavy," I said, standing up. Sophia looks at me with her 'I know you're lying' look.
"Dani," she said while putting the sunscreen on her bag, she's about to say something when I cut her off, "Not now, Sophia, I'm not ready," I said. "Not ready? Not ready to what? Face what you used to have?" she said.
"Sophia, please stop!" I said, frustrated. "No, Dani! I'm so done with this; I'm so done with your attitude! you're being unreasonable!" she said, furious.
"I’m unreasonable? Wow! Do you want me to be happy for them? Do you want me to just accept that my band member stole my girlfriend and you guys supported her? You’re the one who’s unreasonable!”
"Are you hearing yourself? No one stole Y/N from you! You broke her and left her like a puppy! And I’m unreasonable? You left my sister, Daniela, not just anyone but my sister! And I’m here trying to set aside everything that you’ve done to my sister just for this fucking group! So don’t tell me that I’m unreasonable when I’m here trying my best to be your leader when God knows how much I want to murder you right now, so do what you want! Go to your room and be the selfish bitch you are; I’m done with you!" she said and left.
“Sophia, I'm sorry” I tried saying, but she slams the door. ‘Nice one, , Dani. You’re such a great fucking bitch.’
~
That I should've bought you flowers and held your hand ~
“Dani? Can you please buy me some roses? I really love them” Y/N said while looking at the flower shop near the park. “What? No! They’ll die anyway; I don’t want to waste my money,” I said while looking at my phone, not even glancing at her. “Oh, okay, sorry,” she said.
We walk at the park for a while when I felt her hand holding mine. “What are you doing? ” i asked while pulling my hands “i uhm, i just want to hold your hands” she said looking down
“Are you hearing yourself? You act like you’re not Sophia’s sister! What if someone saw us? I don’t want to be involved in a dating scandal, Y/N” I said furiously and walked away without even looking back.
“Dani, i’m sorry” i heard her but i just ignored her
~
“Happy birthday, baby!” Megan said and kissed Y/N’s cheeks,
“You guys are so disgustingly sweet! ”Lara said, “Please, Megan, stop kissing my sister in front of me!” Sophia said, pulling Y/N away from Megan,
“You’re such a cock blocker, Ate!” Y/N said, rolling her eyes, “Then stop kissing in front of me! ”Sophia said, “I’m just happy, okay? She bought me flowers; no one has done it before” Y/N said mumbling the last part.
“Dani? Can you please buy me some roses? I really love them”
“I bought you flowers for your graduation. ”Sophia complained, “That's different” Y/N said. “Yes, Sophia, it's different; you're so old” Lara said, making the rest laugh. “I am not! ” Sophia said earning a giggle from Y/N
“Yes you are, so if you excuse me, i want to hold my girlfriend’s hand” Megan said pulling Y/N
“I, um, I just want to hold your hands.”
“Are you hearing yourself? You act like you’re not Sophia’s sister! What if someone saw us? I don’t want to be involved in a dating scandal, Y/N”
‘She looks so happy, not the same way when she’s with me. I really messed up, huh?’
~
Now I'll never, never get to clean up the mess I made, oh and that haunts me every time I close my eyes~
“Y/N, let’s break up. I’m so tired, and I’m bored of this relationship,” I said, looking at Y/N.
“What? You’re joking, right? It’s not a good joke, Dani,” she said, looking confused.
“I’m not; I’m done with us,” I said and walked away.
“Dani, please! Let’s talk!” She begged while following me, and I just walked towards my car. “Dani, please! You don’t mean that! Let’s fix this, please! I’ll do anything!” She begged , but I just went inside my car and left, leaving her there. Like a puppy.
*72 missed calls from Bae
*5 missed calls from our leader
*9 missed calls from Megan
~
“You guys did so well!” Y/N said while hugging Yoonchae, We just finished our MAMA performance.
“Really? Did you take some video?”Yoonchae asked, “You bet she did; she probably has a Megan fan cam on her phone” Lara said.
“Hey! I have some of you guys, meanie” Y/N said, pouting, ‘cute’
“Hey! Stop bullying my girlfriend. If you guys want a fan cam of yours, find yourself a partner and leave my woman alone” Megan said, pulling Y/N.
‘I have a partner; she used to be. I used to have those fan cams.’
~
Now my baby's dancin', but she's dancin' with another man~
ding dong~
“Dani, can you open the door, please?” Sophia said. “Okay,” I said, and I walked towards the door. I opened the door and saw Y/N.
After 2 months of not seeing her and not hearing anything from her, she’s here standing in front of me.
“What are you doing here? I told you we’re done,” I said. I’m about to close the door when I heard Megan, “Sophia, is that Y/N? ”Megan asked Sophia, “I don’t know; Dani opened the door! ” Sophia shouted from the kitchen.
“Well, as you can see, Daniela. I’m not here for you,” she said. I was about to say something when Megan ran towards the door, not even glancing at me. “Y/N! You’re here so early. You said you’d pick me up at 6:30, and it’s only 6. The reservation was 7, right? Did i read it wrong? ”Megan asked, panicking,
“You didn't read it wrong, Megan; I was just excited for our date, so I’m here, and I want to go somewhere before we go to the restaurant,” Y/N said, giggling.
‘Date??’
“Okay, let’s go. Sophia, we’re leaving” Megan shouted. “Okay! Be safe; take care of my sister! ” Sophia shouted; Megan and Y/N just left like I wasn't there.
I closed the door and walked towards me and Manon’s room while thinking about what I heard: ‘date? They’re going on a date?’
“You look like someone who has seen a ghost,” Manon said, laughing. “They’re going on a date,” I said. “who? ”Manon asked, “Megan and Y/N” I said. “Oh, um, yeah” Manon said, making me look at her in disbelief.
“You knew? You fucking knew?”I asked Mad, “Well, everyone of us knew. They’ve been talking for a month now,” she said, not even looking at me, just focused on her phone.
“Are you guys fucking serious?”I asked, “Yeah, and I don’t see any problem with that” she said, glaring at me. “She’s my fucking ex. ”I said, “and? ”Manon asked, closing her phone, “She’s my ex, and you let her date Megan?'What the fuck is wrong with you all??”I shouted at her.
“What’s going on?”Lara asked confused while entering our room. “You guys happened. You fucking let my ex date my bandmate and didn't even tell me! ”I shouted at the both of them, “Hold on! Who the hell do you think you are for us to tell you everything? You’re just her ex!” Lara said and walked towards me.
“What’s going on here? I heard someone shouting. ” Sophia entered the room while Yoonchae walked behind her.
“Well, Dani here is mad because we did not tell her about your sister and Megan! ”Lara said, “Why would we tell you? You didn't even tell my sister a reasonable reason when you left her; do you think you still have a right to know about it? ”Sophia said, looking at me in disbelief.
“Wow? So you’re teaming up now?”I said, laughing, “We're not; we just happened to use our brains, not like you! Who just left my sister in the park without any explanation, and now you’re mad because we did not tell you about her and Megan?” Sophia walks toward me. “Listen here, Daniela. Stay fucking away from my sister” Sophia said before walking out of the room, followed by the rest.
~
“Daniela, can we talk?”Y/N asked, “Of course” I said, and she sat in front of me.
“I just want to thank you,” she said, making me confused. “What do you mean? I didn't do anything” i asked confused
“Exactly, that’s why I’m thanking you. Thank you for abandoning me, because if you didn’t, I wouldn't be with Megan, right now. I won’t be happy the same way I am now, so thank you” she said before standing up.
“I’m too late, huh? ”I asked, she looks at me before smiling, “You’re far from being late, you’re done” she said before leaving me, leaving me the same way I did.
Oh, I know I'm probably much too late To try and apologize for my mistakes
tags: @cwpiqwon
214 notes · View notes
jmflowers · 3 days ago
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Swarla Kisses Rated [x]
1. "Don't get dressed." (22nd November 2024)
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The loud noise that occurred at the moment this kiss aired was the sound of an entire population's proverbial panties dropping. Has there ever been a hotter line spoken? This is the power-necking the soap community taught us about. Swarla started off SO strong it's frankly terrifying. 14/10 Carla knew what she wanted.
2. "Have you?" (29th November 2024)
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When the most confident dyke on the cobbles asks you if you've changed your mind about your feelings for her, you are required by law to stubbornly keep your hand on your hip. Even if she pushes your hair back from your face as delicately as humanly possible??? If Lisa Swain ever looked at me like that I would burst into flames. 11/10
3. "Is that better?" (16th December 2024)
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We reached the domesticity era of their love in 0.2 seconds flat and I for one am not upset about it. The way Carla nuzzles in? The tilt of Lisa's head? The repetition? I was not expecting more kisses so soon in their story. The only way this could've gotten better is if they'd eaten each other's faces after this had been a clearer angle. 7/10 Carla Connor saying, “I want you.” plays on loop in my head at all times.
4. "Mmm... truffley." (20th December 2024)
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The prolonged eye contact???? The dazed look on Lisa's face immediately after?? The fucking giggles???? The sheer power Carla Connor has and wields for good (ie. my own entertainment). Coronation Street said y'all deserve this. 10/10 Carla can hand feed me any day of the week.
5. "See you later." (20th December 2024)
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Have you ever seen anyone look so peaceful about a decision before? Carla Connor said, "Today's the day I kiss my girlfriend in the street." I know y'all were waiting for that Live Sally Reaction and it did not disappoint. I hope they kiss each other goodbye constantly forever. 6/10 The way she analyzed Lisa's entire face before leaning forward made me scream both internally and externally.
6. New Year's Countdown (31st December 2024)
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If you thought I wouldn't lose my mind over the image of them off in a corner of the pub in their own little world, you were wrong. I need to know if this was a scripting choice, an acting choice, or an editing choice for reasons. I'm never going to get sick of the way Lisa pulls Carla closer by the shoulders (almost) every time they kiss. Lisa closing her eyes like that makes my heart stop beating. 8/10
7. "Ooh, your lip!" (31st December 2024)
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You ever just get aggressively snogged by a woman who's falling in love with you (while your lip is busted open from fighting bad guys)? Superheroes really don't get days off but they do get the girl. I miss the power-necking (literally a month ago?!?), but this was still so cute. 9/10 for the sheer fact that Carla needed a New Year's like this considering she dies like 12 hours later.
8. "Won't take that long." (31st December 2024)
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Carla Connor isn't the only one who nearly fainted shortly after this kiss. Lisa said let me flutter my drunk eyelashes at you. The way Carla opened her mouth?? The breathy, "You want to go to bed?" from Lisa??? The fucking forehead lean???? I am too goddamn gay for this to be on my screen. How did we get a month into this relationship and already reach 8 kiss scenes? 10/10 thanks Coronation Street for the gay rights.
9. "Please don't leave me here." (1st January 2025)
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The fact that Lisa could walk away from Carla in this moment is frankly mind-blowing; her face is the same colour as Betsy's shirt. Lisa, woman, OPEN YOUR DAMN EYES. Someone said Carla looks like she died 3 hours ago and they're not wrong. 3/10 because I'm a sucker for the domestic nature of this but also I want to punch everyone in the face for not protecting our sick baby. Gold star for the Corrie makeup department and their highlighter collection.
10. "Are we okay?" (8th January 2025)
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Lisa Swain's affectionate eye roll immediately after Bobby interrupted them is like 1/1000th of how we all really felt. She lingered on this kiss for so long. The hand coming up to cup Carla's head? The forehead lean again? Carla's little smile when she realized what was about to happen? Give these ladies a room that isn't in hospital or full of their children. 9/10 we're watching f/f hurt/comfort fanfiction live on ITV.
11. Comforting Hand (9th January 2025)
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We're deep in the trenches of this hurt/comfort storyline now, kids. I hope Lisa plans on sitting vigil at Carla's bedside for the rest of their damn lives (yes I'm wearing my clown makeup while I watch this soap). 4/10 because my self-deprecating baby pulled away from the love and support she deserves.
12. Good Luck (13th January 2025)
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As far as kisses go, this barely passes the test, but THEY ARE FAMILY. Carla, proper bricking it. Betsy, also bricking it. Good thing Lisa Swain swooped in to wish her wife girlfriend good luck with the most vanilla cheek peck known to man. Someone get them a room and a dialysis machine whirring to drown out all their kids, stat! 5/10 cause I respect the domesticity.
181 notes · View notes
suunani · 3 days ago
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crimson love ( park sunghoon )
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▍ you learn that love isn’t always enough and can’t save everything.
content : 3730 words, royalty!au, knight!male reader, prince!sunghoon, impossible love, they are nawt happy, sunghoon is kind of cold at first, reader call sunghoon 'my prince' & 'my love', angst, making out, slightly suggestive, cursing.
note : omg this is the first time i’ve written something like this, but i poured a lot of effort into making the emotions and situations believable, so i really hope it resonates with you!
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the flickering candlelight cast long shadows against the cold stone walls of the prince’s private chamber, but the room felt suffocating in a way that no shadow could ever explain.
you knelt in front of sunghoon, your back straight because that's what a knight should look like, but your shoulders hunched because you didn't know how to hold the weight of what you were about to tell him.
“your highness…” you began, your voice a quiet rasp, carefully controlled but laced with something raw — something barely contained. “i'll get rid of her for you.”
the words spilled out, desperate, earnest, and dangerous. you knew they were too bold, too reckless, but in this moment, there was nothing more important than removing the threat looming over him.
you didn't even realize how tightly your hands were balled into fists until you felt your nails digging into your palms. you looked up at him, searching his face for something, anything — but all you got back was that unreadable expression he always wore.
the one that made him feel like he was miles away even when he was right in front of you.
for a moment, the only sound in the room was your breathing, uneven and shaky. sunghoon didn't say a word. his gloved hand hovered near yours, but he didn't touch you.
that, more than anything, made your chest ache.
you couldn't stop yourself. you reached out, your fingers, calloused from years of service and battle, were gentle as they clasped his hand, your touch as tender as ever — so gentle it almost felt wrong — though the rest of you screamed with the weight of your emotions.
you had never dared to show this side of yourself, this rawness. you had always been the strong knight, unwavering, a protector of the prince, of the crown. but now, in this desperate hour, your loyalty, your love, your sacrifice, spilled out in front of him, uncontrollable.
“my prince— my love,” you tried again, your voice breaking on the words, and you hated how small you sounded, how vulnerable.
but there was no hiding from him. not now.
"please. i'll do it. i don't care what it costs me. i would rot in prison if you asked me to. i would go to the ends of the earth, beyond the gates of hell, if it meant keeping you safe. keeping you away from her."
you didn't mean to say that last part, but it slipped out anyway, and now it was just hanging in the air between you, like an accusation. like a confession.
you expected him to get angry. to pull away completely. but instead, something in his eyes shifted.
for the briefest second, his guard dropped, and you saw it — saw him. the sunghoon you'd fallen for, the one who smiled at you like you were his whole world when no one else was watching. the one who kissed you like it hurt to let go.
but it was gone as fast as it came, replaced by that same cold, unreachable mask he always wore. he pulled his hand back sharply, and the ache in your chest turned into something sharper, something that made it hard to breathe.
“you don’t know what you’re saying,” he said finally, his voice tight, controlled.
but you knew better. you knew that the mask he wore was thin, fragile. it wasn’t anger that clouded his features. it was despair.
“i never asked you to do this. not for me. not for anyone. i never wanted you to.”
you didn’t flinch, even though his words cut deeper than he could have known. you couldn’t afford to.
"you don't have to ask," you shot back, and this time your voice didn't shake. you were done pretending. "i'd do anything for you, my prince. you know that."
you wasnt stupid. you were well aware of your place in the world — you always had.
you were a nobody, an orphan, a lost soul abandoned by everyone who had to claw his way out of the streets just to survive. you'd lost everything before you even knew what it meant to have something to lose. you didn't even deserve to be in this room with him.
but sunghoon had chosen you.
he found you in the rain, a chance encounter that had changed the course of your life forever. he had seen something in you that no one else ever had. he had brought you into the fold, given you purpose, given you a future — though you had never dared to imagine what that future might hold.
and somewhere along the way, you'd given him everything in return.
without question, without hesitation.
you had become his knight, his loyal protector, but more than that — his secret lover, when no one else was watching. you had given your body, your heart, your soul to him, knowing full well that it could never be enough.
sunghoon was the prince. his future, his throne, his empire, everything came before you, before your love. and you had accepted that, as painful as it was.
but now, this woman — olivia, the woman sunghoon had been promised to, was the final blow. she wasn’t worthy of him. she couldn’t love him the way you did. she didn't even deserve to be near him.
her every action, her every smile, was a mockery of everything sunghoon stood for. and you, as his knight, as his lover, couldn’t stand to see him bound to someone who would tarnish his name. someone who would drag him into the mud.
“that woman will drag you down with her,” you said, and the words came out harder than you meant them to, but you didn't care.
your hands was still clasping his as if you could somehow hold onto him, keep him from slipping away.
“she frequents brothels. she has not an ounce of loyalty in her. she would make you appear incompetent in the eyes of your people. your enemies would see it, and they will use it against you. she'll destroy everything you've worked for.”
you could see his jaw tighten, his fingers flexing slightly, as if resisting the urge to throw something, to lash out. the room felt heavier with each passing second.
but he didn't say anything. not yet.
“i’ve had her followed,” you continued, your tone fierce now, fueled by the rage and protectiveness you couldn’t mask. “i know what she’s been doing, where she's been going. and i can’t— no, i won’t let her ruin you.”
sunghoon’s breath quickened, his chest rising and falling with each labored inhale.
his entire body had stiffened, the tension radiating from him like a tightly wound cord threatening to snap. you could see the storm brewing behind his eyes — the conflict, the weight of everything he carried on his shoulders.
because deep down, he knew you were right.
you had seen things. heard things. you had watched olivia, followed her every move. olivia was poison. she had seduced every man in her path, her charms a weapon she wielded without mercy.
and her engagement to sunghoon wasn't love — it was a calculated political arrangement. a tool to strengthen the empire, to solidify alliances.
but at what cost? his heart? his future? the very essence of who he was?
sunghoon finally met your eyes, and there was no hiding the conflict swirling within them.
he opened his mouth as if to speak, but the words never came. instead, silence fell between you, heavy and oppressive, as though the weight of his situation was too much for him to put into words.
his father, the emperor, had fallen ill, leaving sunghoon to take the throne far earlier than he had ever expected, far earlier than he was ready. his younger sister had been sent away to marry the tyrant of a neighboring empire, leaving sunghoon to stand alone amidst the chaos.
alone with all with all the expectations and burdens of the empire on his shoulders.
your chest tightened as you watched him, your heart aching with a love so deep and consuming it made your breath catch. you wanted to reach for him, to hold him, to take some of that weight from his shoulders and carry it yourself.
"you deserve someone better, my love," you said quietly, your voice breaking with the emotion you had kept buried for so long. "someone who will stand by you, someone who will love you. not this woman."
at first, sunghoon didn't respond. his eyes narrowed slightly, his gaze growing colder. but it wasn’t aimed at you. it was directed inward.
you could see it, the bitterness and frustration that had been simmering inside him for weeks, for months, for years. it bubbled to the surface now, spilling over in a way he could no longer control.
"i never wanted this," he whispered, his voice so quiet it was almost swallowed by the silence of the room.
the words weren't for you, not really — they were more for himself, a confession dragged from the deepest parts of his soul.
"i never asked for this. i never asked to be emperor. i never wanted to marry her. but my parents, my duty..." his voice cracked, his fists clenching. "they've left me with no choice."
the rawness of his admission struck you like a blow, but you swallowed the ache rising in your throat. this was the ugly truth you had always known, the truth you had seen in the quiet moments when he thought no one was watching.
sunghoon was a man trapped in a cage of his own making, bound by a life that demanded everything from him but gave him nothing in return.
“i would kill anyone who stands in the way of your happiness,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper now, raw with sincerity. “if that’s what it takes… i will do it without hesitation.”
sunghoon didn't say anything. he just stared at you for a long moment, his expression unreadable, but you could see the conflict in his eyes. the way his walls were crumbling, piece by piece.
and then, with a sharp, decisive movement, he broke.
before you could process what was happening, his hands were on you, pulling you up to him with a force that stole the breath from your lungs.
his lips crashed against yours, desperate and hungry, as though kissing you was the only way he could keep himself from falling apart completely.
it was sudden. it was urgent. it was desperate.
it was everything you had been holding back for so long, all at once.
his kiss slammed into you with a force that left you breathless, a bruising, consuming need that neither of you could suppress anymore. you felt it deep in your bones, the way his lips moved against yours with a hunger that bordered on fear — as if he was afraid that if he didn't kiss you now, he'd lose you forever.
you didn't hold back. you couldn't. your hands gripped at his waist, pulling him closer, trying to erase the space between you as if it was the enemy. your fingers curled into the fabric of his coat, desperate to ground yourself in the heat of him, the reality of this moment.
his lips tasted like fire, like the only answer to every prayer you had ever whispered in the dark. and his hands, god, his hands, they clutched at you with the same frantic energy, like you were the one thing keeping him from shattering into pieces.
your fingers traced the sharp lines of his jaw, sliding down to the curve of his neck. every inch of him was warm under your touch, and you were desperate to memorize the feel of him, the way he trembled under your hands.
sunghoon's breathing hitched against your lips, and it only spurred you on. you deepened the kiss, tilting your head, pulling him further into the storm that the two of you had created. his body shuddered against yours, and you knew it wasn't just from the intensity of the kiss — it was the weight of everything unsaid between you. everything that was about to break between you.
but in this moment, none of that mattered.
the kiss spiraled into something more urgent, more primal. you felt all the years of silence, of restraint, breaking apart with each desperate touch. his lips were soft but demanding, moving against yours with a frantic hunger that you had never seen before.
his tongue traced the edges of your mouth, sending a rush of heat through your veins that left you lightheaded. you couldn't get enough of him — his scent, his warmth, the way his hands slid up to your shoulders and clung to you like you were the only thing anchoring him to this damn world.
it wasn't enough. it would never be enough.
you felt the sting of his nails digging into your shoulders through the fabric of your uniform, but it didn't matter. the pain only made everything sharper, clearer. you wanted all of him, every jagged piece of the man who had captured your heart so completely, no matter how much it hurt.
but then, just as suddenly as it had begun, it stopped.
sunghoon pulled back, his breath coming in short, uneven gasps. his lips were swollen and red, his eyes wide and glistening, as if he was trying to process what had just happened. he looked wrecked, like the weight of the kiss — the weight of what you both felt — was too much for him to bear.
and you hated how cold the room felt now, the warmth of his body already fading as the space between you returned.
you didn't let go of him. fuck, you couldn't. your hands were still trembling as they rested against his chest, feeling the rapid beat of his heart beneath your palms. it was wild and erratic, matching your own, but even that wasn't enough to soothe the ache building in your chest.
"sunghoon, my love..." you whispered, your voice barely audible.
but the sound of his name coming from your lips made his eyes dart to yours. there was fear there. fear, frustration and something that looked like regret.
“you— you don’t know what you’re asking of me,” he muttered, his voice tight and strained.
his gaze darted away, his hands falling from your shoulders as though the contact was too much to bear.
“you want me to abandon everything. everything i've ever known. everything i was born to do. everything i've ever been. i can’t… i can’t do that, y/n.”
the words hit you like a knife to the chest, and you felt your throat tighten. you could feel the truth, the brutal reality, beginning to claw its way back into the space between you. sunghoon was trapped. as much as he loved you, as much as he wanted to be with you, he was bound to the empire.
you had known this would happen. you had always known it would come to this, but hearing it from him, hearing the defeat in his voice, the finality of it, was way more than you could handle.
"i can’t lose you," you said, your voice trembling. "you know i would give up everything for you. i would leave this place, leave the kingdom, everything, just to be with you. please. we could escape. we could run away and live a life just for the two of us. i don't care about the empire, about the politics, or about your engagement. i only care about you. about us."
for a moment, his mask slipped. his face flickered with an emotion so fleeting, you almost thought you had imagined it — it was a spark of something that looked like hope.
and then, for the briefest heartbeat, you saw him.
the man beneath the title. the sunghoon who had laughed with you under the stars, fought beside you on countless battles, kissed you in the quiet shadows where no one could see. you saw the sunghoon who had stolen your heart and, in return, made you believe in something greater than yourself.
but the moment didn't last.
sunghoon stepped back, retreating into himself, his expression hardening into the stoic mask of the prince he was trained to be. the weight of his crown, of his kingdom, settled back on his shoulders. he was no longer the man you loved.
he was the heir — bound by duty, by legacy, by chains you couldn't see but could feel pressing between you.
“you think i don’t dream about that?” sunghoon's voice cracked, his frustration spilling through the cracks in his composure.
his fists clenched at his sides, his knuckles turning white as he struggled to hold himself together. his eyes bore into yours, searching for an answer, but there was nothing you could give him. nothing either of you could say would change the truth between you.
“you think i don’t want to run away with you? to leave all of this behind? i’ve dreamed about it every day since i met you. every fucking day. but i can’t. i can’t just abandon everything that’s been entrusted to me. i can't abandon my duty, my family, my people. they're counting on me. i can't be selfish, not even for you.”
his words cut through you like a blade.
you wanted to scream, to beg him to stop, to tell him that he was allowed to be selfish, that he was allowed to choose happiness.
but you couldn't. instead, you stepped closer, your heart breaking as you reached for him, your voice trembling as you tried one last time to reach the man you knew still lived beneath the surface.
“you don’t have to carry it alone. let me carry it with you. let me be the one who stands by your side, always. please, you don't have to do this on your own.”
for a moment, he faltered. his shoulders sagged, and his gaze fell to the floor. the weight of what you were asking settled over him, and you could see the war raging inside him — the push and pull of duty and love, of obligation and desire. and for just a moment, you thought he might give in.
but when he lifted his head again, his eyes were filled with a sadness so deep, so consuming, it left you out of breath.
"if i run away with you..." his voice was strained, barely audible, but you could hear the pain in each word. "i would be nothing. a fugitive, a traitor to my people, to my family. and you... you would be too."
his eyes flickered up to meet yours, and the anguish there made your breath catch.
"you deserve more than that, y/n. you deserve to be free. you deserve someone who can give you everything without holding anything back."
your head shook before you even realized it, tears stinging your eyes as you took another step closer. the space between you still felt too vast, too unbearable.
"i don't care about the empire, sunghoon," you said, your voice breaking as your hands cupped his face. you needed him to hear you, to understand. "i care about you. i always have."
he closed his eyes at your touch, his features twisting in a way that made your heart clench painfully. a shudder ran through his body, and for a fleeting moment, you thought he might finally let go. that he might finally let himself choose you.
but when his eyes opened again, they were filled with a deep sadness — a sadness that had always lingered beneath the surface, but now it consumed him fully.
“i love you,” he whispered, the words barely audible, as though saying them any louder might destroy him completely. “i love you more than anything. but i can’t leave this kingdom. i can’t abandon my father, my people, my duty.”
the finality of his words slammed into you like a physical blow. your chest tightened, your lungs straining to take in air as the truth settled heavily around you. there was no more room for hope, no more room for the dreams of a future you had once dared to imagine.
it was over.
the empire had claimed him.
and you… well, you had always known that you would be the one left behind, hadn't you?
the silence between you stretched out, unbearable. you felt your hands fall from his face, trembling as they rested uselessly at your sides. your heart ached with the kind of pain you didn't think you'd ever recover from, but you knew you couldn't fight anymore.
you had given him everything — your loyalty, your love, your very soul — and now you had nothing left to give. now he was slipping through your fingers like sand.
“i can’t ask you to choose, sunghoon,” you whispered, your voice raw and broken. “but i can’t stay in a kingdom that has no place for me. not when it means losing you.”
his eyes met yours, his face a mask of conflicted emotions that only made the ache in your chest worse. his lips parted slightly, as though he wanted to say something, anything, to stop you, to make this all go away. but no words came.
and you knew, deep down, that there was nothing he could say.
with a shaking breath, you took a step back, letting your hands fall to your sides. the coldness in the air felt like a physical blow, and you felt as though you were standing at the edge of a cliff, the ground crumbling beneath your feet.
“goodbye, my love,” you said softly, your voice trembling but steady enough to carry the weight of your heartache. “i’ll always love you. always.”
his eyes widened, panic flashing in them like a warning flare. but you didn’t wait for him to respond. you turned away, your heart shattering with every step you took away from him.
the door to his chambers opened with a low creak, and you stepped out into the dimly lit hallway, your feet carrying you farther and farther away from the only person who had ever truly mattered to you.
he didn’t chase after you. he didn’t call your name.
you hadn't expected him to.
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dynamic-k · 11 hours ago
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Decided to take your MUST-AESTHETICIZE willpower because I have a messy room- I already have enough perfectionism to deal with~
Warning about the spoiler Doc. [ITS LIKE 8K WORDS NOW. It's basically, ordered in chapter progression succession, extra scenes I was brainrotting about, that will eventually get inserted into chapters 12-15 or so of The Spark.]
It does included major angst, as implied with some of the scarier tags input on the Archive's tags for The Spark as a work. It does include some death. It contains major spoilers for the ending of The Spark.
If you really want that insider look and don't care about the spoilers at all, because it may be months yet before those scenes are released as solid chapters to the actual public Fanfic work, don't hesistate to tell me and I will private message you with permissions to view and comment on the Google Doc.
DON'T TAKE MY COFFEE, I STARTED DAY ONE TODAY AND NEED IT BADLY- AHAHDHEJHDHAGSHHFDHJS
..I'm kinda curious how many people will want that Doc. What have I gotten myself into-
[Conditions for actually gaining access to the Doc are just 1.) Let me know thoughts please. I need feedback and motivation to thrive. ✨️ 2.) No sharing the Doc's link to anyone else. Only I'm allowed to do that.]
No pressure tagging!
@theofficalrocketcorp @oakywoaky @stiwnty @multimix101 @asmollgremlin @sollistically @itsyouch @fantarules677 @fireflyflarenight @stormbreaker101 @redjockfrog @xyna-loot [+anyone else interested~!!]
thanks for the tag @hellohallowedhalo i am taking. your dog <3
no pressure tagging @bumblewyn @bitchboy and whoever else wants to do this!
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graciedollie · 1 day ago
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Hii,can we get a masc!reader x ambessa I never see it it can be hcs or smut/fluff wtv you want lol
Ambessa Medarda x Masc!Reader Headcannons
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Warnings: Nothing too major tbh, mention lex sesbian, fingering, cunnilingus, face-sitting, and scissoring :3
A/N: I’m not too good at writing for masc but i tried my best, but hope you like it babes <3
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She was more used to delicate things whenever it came down to her little special moments, as she didn’t do relationships—obviously.
But when she saw you, she was intrigued by you. The way you dressed and carried yourself. She couldn’t help but be drawn to you even more as she saw the way you would give her ‘those’ glances here and there.
Once Ambessa wanted something, best believe it would be in her grasp soon.
You two would usually run into each other while she would be sampling the local cuisine, sharing glances here and there, but never really saying anything to each other.
The tension was definitely up there.
Though the time soon came where you finally talked to each other as you had met each other at a nice restaurant, sparking yo a lovely, productive conversation—ofc you couldn’t help but gaze stupidly at her beautiful scars over her darkened almond skin, her braided hair that was struck with strikes of grey, and those plump wine lips of hers.
She was everything to you and you were everything to her.
Her eyes couldn’t help but scan over you—seeing the way your lips looked whenever you smirked or laughed, the way you held eye contact with her, and the way you just simply carried yourself. She couldn’t help but be drawn to you—especially when you started to talk about your own interests.
It seemed you were giving the poor woman a run for her money.
The way you’d lean back with a subtle manspread, voice etched with a teasing tone, and how you were shameless her out. It was honestly entertaining and intrigued her more.
Oh she had to have you.
NEOW.
The next couple days, you went on little outings together. Eating out, seeing theatre, and other activities that you both pretty like to do—making the new experience more enjoyable for the two of you as you also started to know more about each other as those days went on.
It was going really, REALLY well!!
With the small dates, it soon led you to mostly wake up in a large bed adorned with silky sheets with her gazing at you with that intense gaze while her sculptured body was dressed in a dark wine robe—accentuating her beauty that made you fall for her even more.
Though you led more on the masc side, that didn’t stop her from what she had in mind from you. Regardless, you were going to be laying on your ride, settling on her face or standing up as she ate you out like a starved woman or fingering you till your pussy singed to her or gave you slow, deep strokes with her strap. It was honestly music to her ears to hear those sweet groans and low moans of your whenever she would flick her tongue over your throbbing clit or pump her thick fingers in that same spot that made you tremble.
Oh and her? She loved how you were so eager to always please her. Whether it was by eating her out, fingering her, strapping or even scissoring—she could see how eager you were just by the way your own noises would somewhat overlap hers, even if you were eating her out or strapping her.
Ofc she still spoils you rotten.
You like jewelry? She’ll have the finest just for you. You like wearing suits? She’ll have the best tailor that she knows to make you a nice suit. You want a new set of fragrances? She’s already getting it from the best she knows.
She’ll spoil you rotten with no end and it’ll forever stay that way <3
When there are times you dress fem, she can’t help but stare at you as if you held the entire world in your hands. Though it’s every now and then you’ll do it, she still can’t help herself but gawk at you. You looked even more stunning.
Though ofc, she’ll tease you her and there about how you have to look up at her since she’s literally like 6’9 (???)
In conclusion, she pretty much gonna love ya regardless🎀
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hope you enjoyed dollies <3
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womenwoso · 2 days ago
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Thank you so much for the kind words on my last fic. It's really appreciated. Thank you to @helen-with-an-a for being amazing and proofreading. Hope you enjoy and requests are open. Please send in ideas.
Hard questions
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Mapí León was perched on the edge of the sofa, her eyes showing her exhaustion after a long day of practice. Fresh from a shower, her damp hair was wrapped in a towel when Clara burst into the room, her little face beaming with excitement.
“Mamí!” Clara exclaimed, her voice bubbling with enthusiasm. “I saw a picture of you in your Spain jersey at school today! You looked so happy, like me when I play football with you and all my tias. When do I get to play with them again? Why don’t you play for Spain anymore, do you not love Spain?
Mapí paused, Clara was in the stage of asking questions constantly, but this question hung in the air like a heavy cloud. She had anticipated this moment. Clara was getting old enough to ask tough questions—ones that carried a lot of history, choices, and feelings that Mapí had kept to herself but she hadn’t expected this question just yet.
For a brief moment, Mapí was silent, just gazing at her daughter, who was looking back at her with wide, innocent eyes, eager for a response.
“Clara, honey,” Mapí began gently, pulling her onto her lap, “It’s not that I don’t love playing for Spain anymore. I’ve always loved it. I still do.”
Clara tilted her head, clearly puzzled. “Then why don’t you play with my tias? You’re the best player! Tia Ale plays for Spain, so does Aita, Patri, Jana and Irene. All the girls play for a country there's a lot of countries more than just Spain. It's so cool. ”
Mapí let out a soft laugh, gently pushing a lock of hair away from Clara’s forehead. “You know, being the best doesn’t always cut it. Football is more than just skills—it’s about the teammates, the environment, and how you feel … on the inside.”
Clara looked puzzled, her little brain trying to process the information. “But … but you’re amazing, Mamí! You helped Spain win! Why wouldn’t they want you anymore?”
Mapí felt a weight in her chest. She had kept the real reasons for stepping back from the national team to herself, not wanting to overwhelm Clara with the complicated details. But now, her daughter deserved honesty, even if it was tough to share.
“Sometimes, Clara,” Mapí said, her voice thick with feeling, “sometimes the people in charge don’t treat you the way you should be treated. They don’t do their jobs properly and might end up hurting people. They might not recognise your worth. And when you feel that way for too long, it gets hard to keep going. When something like that happens, iIt hurts. And when something hurts, you have to think about what’s best for you.”
Clara paused, clearly processing everything. Mapí could see the little gears working in her brain. “So... you left … because they were … mean? … to you?”
Mapí gazed into her daughter’s eyes, so similar to her own, feeling a pang in her heart. “Sí carino, something like that. But it’s not just about being nice. It’s about feeling valued and … and being respected. Football is all about teamwork, but it is also based on trust and support. When those things are missing, it gets really tough to keep playing.”
Clara seemed to ponder this for a while, a little crinkle forming in her brow. Finally, she asked, “Are you going to go back?”
Mapí offered a gentle smile, a blend of sadness and hope shining in her eyes. “I’m not sure, nena. Sometimes, people need a little time to heal before they can return to something and sometimes you have to step away so the changes that need to be made can happen. Right now, I’m focusing on Barça and making sure I’m in a good place, where I can be the best version of myself …  the best Mamí I can be for you. I can’t promise I’ll ever play for Spain again, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love the game or my country. I do. Always.”
Clara looked up at her mom, her tiny hands resting on Mapí’s arm. “I want you to play for Spain again. I want to see you in the jersey.”
Mapí’s heart warmed, her daughter’s words reminding her of the love that kept her going every day. “Maybe one day, pequeña. Maybe one day.”
The room fell silent for a moment, the heaviness of their talk hanging in the air. Mapi realised that Clara didn’t grasp everything completely, but she could see the love and hope shining in her daughter’s eyes. And honestly, that was enough for now.
With a gentle kiss on Clara’s forehead, Mapí pulled her in for a tight hug. “No matter what happens, you’ll always be my biggest supporter. That’s what really counts.”
Clara beamed, resting her head on her mom’s shoulder. “I’ll always cheer for you, Mamí. Forever.”
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mellowmusings · 1 day ago
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death bed | coffee for your head
Azriel x sick reader
A/N- I had the idea for this when I heard the song and instead of sick Azriel I made a sick reader, please don't kill me and let me know if you wanna be tagged. Enjoy :). Warning- Angst, reader is depressed and sick, Azzie baby is depressed too. Mainly a really sad fic (mentions of death due to illness). Summary- You had been sick for sometime now and upon visiting a healer you find out the reason, unsure how much time you have left, you wish to spend every second of it preparing Azriel for the moment you leave.
'Don't stay awake for too long Don't go to bed I'll make a cup of coffee for your head I'll get you up and going out of bed'
You were tired to say the least, for the past few nights you hadn't been able to sleep at all, and your sweet mate was worried sick for you, and so you had to change your plans for the day, ditching shopping for a visit to Madja instead.
A bell rang as you step into the healer's shop, the air was thick with the scent of dried herbs and incense, instantly calming your nerves. Soft light filters through the curtains, casting a warm glow on shelves cluttered with jars, vials, and bundles of plants you didn't recognize. The space felt ancient, yet welcoming, as if it held the quiet weight of countless healing rituals. A small wooden counter sat at the back, covered with bottles and unmarked potions. The faint sound of wind chimes hung in the air, but it’s the stillness that stood out—everything in this room felt intentional, designed to soothe, to listen. There attending to a small plant with the smallest flowers you had ever seen stood Madja.
Yeah, I don't wanna fall asleep I don't wanna pass away I've been thinking of our future 'Cause I'll never see those days I don't know why this has happened, but I probably deserve it I tried to do my best, but you know that I'm not perfect
You felt like throwing up, surely this was a joke? it had to be a joke, no she was lying or maybe you had misheard her, it had to be that way, right? "I know this can be shocking news y/n but like I said it's also a very rare illness" "No,no you're lying please tell me you're lying". She begged. Her voice broke on the last word, she couldn't breathe she felt choked, she wanted to throw up but instead she just fell to her knees and cried her heart out.
I've been praying for forgiveness, you've been praying for my health When I leave this earth, hoping you'll find someone else 'Cause, yeah, we're still young, there's so much we haven't done Getting married, start a family, watch your husband with his son
She didn't know how long she spent crying there with Madja comforting her and stroking her back, she was in shock but more than that she was worried for Azriel, if something happened to her then- No, no she wasn't going to think about that right now but for some reason her thoughts kept circling back to Azriel, to the quiet that would fill the room when she was gone. He’d wake up, reach for her, and feel nothing but emptiness. The bed would be cold, the silence too heavy. He’d feel it in the small things—no more shared glances, no more soft words in the dark.
Would he be okay without her? She couldn’t shake the fear that the grief would swallow him, that the shadows he kept so tightly contained would consume him without her there to pull him back. Would the memories be enough, or would they slip through his fingers? The thought of him unraveling, of him breaking, made her heart ache in a way she couldn’t ignore. She wouldn’t be there to catch him, and that terrified her.
Her gaze caught on a lovely family in the park, children being chased by their dad, their mom laughing at the scene and smiling lovingly at her partner, right, she would never be able to have that with Azriel either. Maybe, one day he'll find someone else, who'd love him just as much as she did, someone who'd start a family with him, give him heirs as lovely as he is. She hoped so because if Madja was right then-
I wish it could be me, but I won't make it off this bed I hope I go to heaven, so I see you once again My life was kinda short, but I got so many blessings Happy you were mine, it sucks that it's all ending
Don't stay awake for too long Don't go to bed I'll make a cup of coffee for your head I'll get you up and going out of bed, yeah
And I, don't stay awake for too long Don't go to bed I'll make a cup of coffee for your head I'll get you up and going out of bed
Yeah, I'm happy that you're here with me I'm sorry if I tear up When me and you were younger, you would always make me cheer up Taking goofy videos while walking through the park You would jump into my arms every time you heard a bark
You lay back against the pillows, your chest rising and falling with every shallow breath. Azriel sat beside you, his fingers gently brushing over your hand, but the tension in the air was thick, suffocating. You could feel the worry in his touch, in the way he kept glancing at you, like he was afraid to miss something, afraid to lose you before he could even understand what was happening.
"Azriel," you whispered, your voice trembling as you gathered the courage to finally say the words. "I’m sick." You tried to keep your tone calm, but it cracked as soon as the words left your lips. "The healer said it’s a rare heart condition. Something... incurable."
His face froze, eyes widening with disbelief, and he leaned forward, as if to pull you into him, to somehow shield you from the world. But you didn’t want his protection right now. You wanted him to hear this. To know the truth, even if it shattered him.
"I wish it could be me," you continued softly, the words slipping out before you could stop them. "I wish I could take it all. The pain. The time. But I—" You faltered, and the tears you had been holding back finally broke free. "I won’t make it off this bed, Azriel."
His hand tightened around yours, his breath shaky, but he said nothing, his eyes begging you to take it back, to tell him it wasn’t true. But you couldn’t. Not anymore.
"I hope I go to heaven," you murmured, forcing a small smile through your tears. "So I can see you again. One day, after this... after all of this."
Azriel’s face crumpled with pain, his eyes bright with unshed tears. He reached for you, pulling you close as if he could somehow hold you together, like he could make everything right if he just tried hard enough. "No," he whispered, his voice raw. "No, please. Don’t say that. Don’t leave me." It hurt to see the brave and stoic shadow singer crumble infront of you over such a small matter, he had faced death time and time again, but never had you seen him so broken.
You closed your eyes, savoring the feel of him holding you, but there was no denying it now. You couldn’t keep pretending. You couldn’t keep fighting against what you knew in your bones was coming.
"I’m not ready," you whispered, voice barely audible, "but I think... I think you need to be. This is the reality now, Love. I won’t have much time left."
Azriel held you tighter, but it was clear that he was barely holding on himself. You could feel his heart racing against yours, the fear, the love, the desperation. But you knew, deep down, there was no way to stop it.
"I just need you to be ready," you whispered, your voice barely a breath. "Because I won’t be here for long. I need you to promise me something, Az."
He pulled back just enough to look at you, his face a mask of agony, but he nodded, clinging to your every word.
"Promise me you won’t forget me," you said, the ache in your chest growing, but you didn’t want him to carry this burden forever. "Promise me you’ll live, not survive, but live, even if I’m not there."
He pressed his forehead to yours, and for a moment, it was like the world stopped moving. "I’ll never forget you," he said hoarsely. "And I’ll never stop loving you, not even after…"
You nodded, a tear slipping down your cheek, but you could feel the finality of it, the quiet acceptance in your soul that you had already said goodbye. "I know. But you have to promise me, Love. Please. Live, for both of us."
The words hung in the air between you, heavy, inevitable. And in that moment, you let go. You accepted what was coming, not with peace, but with a sorrow that was too vast to express.
Azriel didn’t say anything after that. He just held you, and in the silence of the room, you both faced what you knew was coming, as painful and unbearable as it was.
Cuddle in your sheets, sang me sound asleep And sneak out through your kitchen at exactly 1:03 Sundays went to church, on Mondays watched a movie Soon you'll be alone, sorry that you have to lose me
You were curled up against Azriel, the quiet crackling of the fire the only sound in the room. He held you close, his warmth wrapping around you like a shield from the world. The memories flowed easily now, the ones you both cherished, the ones you were trying so hard to relive, to hold on to.
"Cuddle in your sheets," you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper, "like we used to, like we did so many times. You’d sing me to sleep, your voice soft, your hand in my hair."
Azriel’s thumb brushed over your skin as if committing the sensation of this moment to memory, the feeling of your body pressed against his. "I’ll sing you to sleep forever if I can," he replied, voice thick with emotion. "But you know... I think the best part was sneaking out through your kitchen at exactly 1:03. I used to look at the clock, and I knew you’d be there. We’d laugh, sneak away like we didn’t have a care in the world."
You chuckled softly, a tear slipping down your cheek at the thought. "Sundays, we went to church together. Mondays, we’d watch a movie, get lost in each other’s company. Simple, sweet. And it was ours." You pulled back slightly to look up at him, a small, sad smile on your lips. "I wish we had more of those Mondays."
Azriel's eyes softened with the weight of your words, his voice barely more than a broken whisper. "We still have now," he said, but even he knew the truth in the heaviness of his words. Time was running out.
You closed your eyes, trying to soak in every moment, every detail. You could feel the pain of the inevitable, but for tonight, for this brief moment, you clung to the idea that you could still make new memories. "But soon you'll be alone," you whispered, a sob escaping before you could stop it. "I’m sorry that you have to lose me."
Azriel’s grip on you tightened, his face pressing into your hair. "Don’t say that," he murmured, though his voice was thick with sorrow. "I’ll never lose you. Not really. Not in my heart."
You nodded, your body trembling in his arms. "I hope so," you whispered, holding him tighter. "But I’ll always love you. Every memory, every laugh, every quiet Sunday. I’ll carry those with me, even when I’m gone."
And for a moment, time felt still, like the universe had paused just long enough for you both to hold on to each other a little tighter, to try and make every second count before it was all gone.
Don't stay awake for too long Don't go to bed I'll make a cup of coffee for your head I'll get you up and going out of bed
And I, don't stay awake for too long Don't go to bed I'll make a cup of coffee for your head I'll get you up and going out of bed
Don't stay awake for too long Don't go to bed I'll make a cup of coffee for your head I'll get you up and going out of bed
Azriel sat beside you, his hand resting gently on your own, the warmth of his touch a stark contrast to the chill that seemed to constantly settle in your bones. Your breathing was shallow, weak, each rise and fall of your chest an effort, and yet, despite it all, you smiled up at him. It was the kind of smile that told him you were fighting, even when it seemed like there was no fight left in you.
"I don't want you to stay awake for too long," you whispered, your voice thin, but still full of the love you carried for him. "I know you watch over me, but you need sleep too, Azriel." Your hand squeezed his, the action small but intentional.
He looked at you, eyes filled with an ache that ran deeper than the shadows that normally clung to him. His gaze searched your face, searching for something, anything that might bring you back to him, but there was nothing he could do to stop what was coming. His grip tightened, but he didn't speak. What could he say? Every word felt like a lie in the face of what you both knew was inevitable.
"You've been so strong," he finally whispered, voice hoarse. "Please, don’t give up on me now." His thumb stroked over your knuckles, as if grounding himself in the reality that, in his heart, he knew you were slipping away.
You let out a soft, raspy laugh, and though it was faint, it made him want to smile, even though the pain was consuming him. "I’m not giving up," you said, each word a battle, but the light in your eyes still bright enough to pierce through the darkness. "I’m just… trying to make the most of the time we have left."
Azriel closed his eyes for a moment, his chest tightening, but you gently cupped his cheek, urging him to look at you. "Don’t stay awake for too long," you repeated softly, your hand slipping into his as you pressed it over your heart. "Don’t go to bed, not yet. I’m still here. I’m still with you."
He leaned in, pressing his forehead to yours. You felt his warm breath on your skin, a small reminder of how much he loved you. How much he needed you.
"Let me take care of you," he murmured, his voice breaking. "Let me make you coffee in the morning, just like we used to. I’ll get you out of bed. I’ll help you find your strength again, just like before."
You smiled at him, the tears in your eyes blurring your vision. "I’ll make the coffee," you whispered, "when I can. I’ll make sure you get through it, even after I’m gone. I wrote you letters. Letters for the years to come, so you’ll know I’m still with you. So you’ll know that I’ll always love you, even when I’m not there."
Azriel’s heart shattered. "No," he said hoarsely, "No, you can’t leave me." His voice broke at the end, the rawness of his fear leaking through. You were fighting so hard, so fiercely, for him, but he couldn’t stop the truth from settling in his chest.
"You’ve always been my strength, Azriel," you whispered, your voice so soft, but so full of love. "And I’ll be yours, even when I’m not here to hold you. I need you to live. To keep fighting. And when the days feel long, when the nights feel too empty, I want you to read those letters. They’re for you. I’ll make sure you find your way."
Azriel couldn’t hold back the tears anymore. He leaned down, kissing your forehead, his lips trembling against your skin. "I’m going to keep you here with me, in my heart. Forever. I promise. I won’t forget, I swear it."
You smiled through the tears, despite the weariness that clung to your body. "I’m not leaving you, Azriel," you whispered, "not really. Not ever."
But the truth, unspoken between you both, was that you didn’t have much longer. And still, you fought, not for yourself but for him, so he could have something to hold on to after you were gone.
"Please," he begged softly, his voice breaking, "don’t leave me."
You brushed a tear from his cheek, as your voice trembled, "I’ll never really leave you, Azriel. I’ll always be with you. In every letter, in every thought."
You paused, a soft, warm breath escaping your lips. "I’ll get you out of bed, Azriel," you whispered, a hint of a smile on your face, "I’ll get you going again. Even if I’m not there to see it."
His tears fell freely now, but there was a quiet peace in the way he held you—knowing, with an ache so deep it felt like it might swallow him whole, that he would carry you forever.
And I, don't stay awake for too long Don't go to bed I'll make a cup of coffee for your head I'll get you up and going out of bed
A few weeks had passed, and the weight of each day was beginning to take its toll. The glow in your eyes had dimmed, and your breath came in shallow, uneven gasps. Azriel stayed by your side every moment, his presence constant, like a shadow you never wanted to be without.
He had been trying to hold on to the last threads of you, keeping the hope alive that maybe, somehow, you would pull through. But he knew. He knew with every soft breath you took, with every fleeting smile you gave him, that time was slipping away from both of you.
Today, though… today it felt like everything was slower. The air in the room was thick with an aching kind of quiet, the kind where even the heartbeats that echoed in the space between you seemed too loud.
Azriel sat on the edge of the bed, his arms around you, pulling you close like you’d always been. His fingers lightly traced the line of your jaw, like he could imprint your face into his soul if he touched you long enough. His lips pressed to your forehead, trying to pour every ounce of love and comfort he could into you, but it felt like it was never enough.
You had grown weaker. Your skin was pale, your breathing labored, but you still smiled at him when your eyes fluttered open.
"I’m still here," you whispered softly, your voice raspy but filled with the love you had for him. "I’m still here, Azriel."
He blinked back the tears that threatened to fall, his throat tight. "You don’t have to fight anymore," he murmured, brushing the damp strands of hair from your face. "I’ve got you. I’ll never let you go."
You smiled faintly, your hand reaching for his, weak but determined. "I know," you whispered. "I know… but I have to tell you something, something important."
Azriel leaned closer, his heart pounding in his chest. "Anything," he breathed. "Tell me anything, love. I’m listening."
"I wrote letters," you whispered, barely able to keep your eyes open. "For the years to come… For you. So you know I’ll always be with you, even when I’m not." He silently promised himself would read every letter you left behind, each one a piece of your love, keeping him alive in a world where you no longer were.
Azriel’s chest tightened, a sob breaking free from deep inside him. "You don’t have to go," he said, his voice raw, breaking with the weight of everything he wished he could say, everything he wished he could change. "I can’t… I can’t lose you."
A tear slipped down your cheek, but your smile didn’t fade. You reached up with trembling fingers, tracing the line of his jaw, as if trying to memorize him the way he had memorized you. "You’ll be okay, Azriel. You’re so strong. You’ve always been strong. Just—just remember that I love you. I always will."
His breath caught in his throat as he kissed your hand gently, his voice cracking. "I love you," he whispered, "I love you more than I could ever put into words."
You closed your eyes, your hand slipping from his, but he caught it again instantly, holding on as if it would keep you tethered to him, keep you from slipping away.
Your breathing grew even more shallow, each one taking more effort than the last. Azriel could feel the tremor in your body, the slow, inevitable shift that told him everything he feared was coming. But he didn’t let go. He couldn’t.
"I’m not ready to let you go," Azriel murmured, his voice hoarse, tears streaming down his face as he held you in his arms. "I’ve never been ready to let you go. Not now, not ever."
You gave him one last, gentle smile, your hand resting against his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart beneath your fingertips. "You’ll always have me," you whispered, your voice barely a breath. "In every letter, in every thought, in every coffee you make. You’ll find me again, in the quiet moments. I’ll always be with you."
And then, as if your body had finally found peace, your chest stilled. Your breathing slowed, and for the first time in weeks, there was complete silence. Azriel’s heart shattered, his breath caught in his throat, and for a long moment, he couldn’t move. He couldn’t breathe.
"No," he choked out, his voice breaking, his chest heaving with the weight of loss. "No, please…"
But there was no response. Only the soft, quiet sound of his heartbeat echoing through the silence, as if trying to fill the emptiness you left behind. His arms tightened around you one last time, as if holding you could bring you back, as if love could defy death.
For a long while, Azriel stayed there, clutching you to him, his tears falling onto your skin. He couldn’t let go. Not yet. He needed to hold you, to feel you close, to believe, for just a little longer, that you weren’t truly gone.
And in the stillness of the room, as the shadows of night stretched across the floor, Azriel whispered the only thing left in his broken heart.
"I’ll always love you. Always."
The room was silent. Still. But his words lingered in the air, a promise he would carry with him forever.
And I, don't stay awake for too long Don't go to bed I'll make a cup of coffee for your head I'll get you up and going out of bed
Azriel stood at the edge of the balcony, staring into the endless void of night. The stars above seemed to mock him, distant and cold, twinkling as though the universe was still moving forward, as though life was continuing. But for him, everything had stopped.
The wind swept through the courtyard, its icy fingers clawing at his skin, but it was nothing compared to the cold that had settled deep in his chest, in his soul. He had not moved from that spot since… since that moment. The moment she had slipped away from him, her final breath trembling in his arms, leaving nothing but an echo of the love they had shared. The world felt like a hollow, silent place, and he was drowning in its emptiness.
He could still smell her, faintly. Her scent lingered in the air, in the folds of the blanket she had used to curl up in, in the spaces between the letters she had written him, all the things that were now gone—faded into the dust of the world she had left behind.
Her letters. He had read them, over and over, each one a tear-streaked page of her love for him, a love he could no longer feel against his skin, in her touch, in her smile. He had read her last words, over and over, searching for some kind of comfort. But the comfort never came. The words she had left behind—I’ll always be with you, Azriel—only left him feeling more alone. Her absence was a shadow that consumed everything.
"I’ll always be with you," he muttered bitterly to the darkened sky, as if the universe owed him something. "Where the hell are you now?"
He wanted to scream. To shout into the abyss that had taken her from him, to demand it give her back. But what was the point? The universe didn’t care. Time didn’t care. And now, all that was left was his hollow existence.
The days blurred together, the ache of her absence cutting deeper with every passing hour. He had stopped sleeping, stopped eating. He couldn’t bring himself to do anything but exist, moving through each day as if in a fog. The shadows whispered her name—her voice, her laughter, the warmth of her skin against his—and all he could do was shut his eyes and pretend he didn’t hear them.
But the silence… the silence was the worst.
Everywhere he went, there were reminders. The empty corner of the room where her chair used to sit, the books she had loved scattered across the table, the coffee mug she had left on the counter—his mug now, though it meant nothing. All of it was just a reminder that she was gone, and he was left alone, trapped in a world where nothing made sense without her. Without her laughter, without the way she’d tease him in the mornings, the soft way she’d press her face to his chest when she needed comfort.
She had been everything to him. His light, his warmth, his reason to fight. And now…
The darkness pressed in on him, a crushing weight on his chest. His wings, once majestic and powerful, now felt like an anchor. He had no use for them anymore. They had carried him through battles, through pain, through moments of glory. But now they felt like a reminder of how empty he was. How much of a shell he had become.
The weight of the silence was unbearable. He could feel the crushing loneliness clawing at him, desperate to consume him whole. And as he stood there, staring out into the endless night, he almost wished for it to. He almost wished for the silence to swallow him, to take him with her, because what was the point of living in a world where she wasn’t there?
“I can’t keep doing this,” he whispered to the darkness, his voice cracking. His breath came in short, uneven bursts, each one a reminder that he was still alive—still breathing, even though every part of him screamed to be gone. To be where she was, wherever that was, because life without her felt like a slow, torturous death.
He ran a hand through his hair, tugging at it as if the physical pain would distract him from the ache in his chest. But it didn’t. Nothing could.
The weight of everything pressed on him—the guilt, the anger, the regret. He had promised her, promised her, that he would take care of her, that he wouldn’t let her go. But in the end, he had failed. He hadn’t been enough to save her. And now, she was gone, and all he had left were the memories. The hollow echoes of her voice, her laughter, her touch.
“I wasn’t enough for you,” he whispered, a raw, broken sob escaping him. His knees buckled, and he crumpled to the ground, his wings folding around him like an armor of despair. “I couldn’t save you. And now… now I have nothing.”
He curled into himself, his arms wrapping around his knees, his head pressed against them as the tears came in waves. His body trembled with the force of it. Every sob was like a shard of glass digging deeper into his heart, but it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered anymore.
The world had moved on. The stars had continued to shine. The wind had continued to blow. But for Azriel, it had all stopped. Because she was gone, and no matter how many times he whispered her name into the darkness, no matter how many times he begged for her to come back, he knew the truth.
She was gone. And he was broken beyond repair.
Time would pass, the seasons would change, but none of it mattered. Nothing mattered without her.
And as the silence closed in around him, Azriel made a vow to the shadows, to the darkness that now felt like home.
He would never forgive himself. He would never forget the way she had died in his arms, the way he couldn’t save her. And as the cold night wrapped itself around him, he whispered through clenched teeth, “I’ll make the world pay. I’ll make everything pay for taking you from me.”
But even as the words left his lips, he knew they wouldn’t bring her back.
And he would have to live with that.
Taglist: @anarchiii @er1023 @siriuslystyle1989 @velarisdusk @scorpioriesling @starlightazriel
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kiszjuli · 2 days ago
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↳ trust me the way i trust you .ᐟ n.jm
— in which you and your lifelong best friend have one of your traditional sleepovers, yet something about you two is different this time. he’s more clingy, you’re more bold..it’s just simple bantering..what could go wrong? oh yeah, and you have an immense crush on jaemin but he doesn’t feel the same- you think.
— parings: childhoodbestfriend!jaemin x afab!reader
— w.c: 4.6k
— warnings/tags: none really, just mc is a little frustrating lmao bare with her (not proofread), jaem is a total flirt, calls reader love, somewhat unrealistic lowk, no angst yippie, non idol au, (kinda) college au
j.note: hi luvvs!! this is my first post and piece of writing so pls don’t bash it too much, i wrote more than i thought i would and i think it turned out pretty good but constructive criticism is always welcome (and needed)!! hope you enjoy :)
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jaemin, your best friend, was over at your house for your monthly sleepover. you had been friends for as long as you could remember. your parents had told you years back that you two originally met at the park and immediately became attached at the hip. everyday since then you two were seen together. he was your best friend. you went to him about anything and everything, as he did, you.
since you had known each other so long and your families had grown close, they let you have sleepovers as of about 2 years ago. during these sleepovers, you would always start with a movie, having your quirky traditions of rating the movie afterwards and voicing your comments and opinions as if you were professional reviewers.
then you would move on to something else as your attention span had grown shorter. usually you guys would go for a walk, or try to learn some random choreography, or even just talk.
this time around was no different; you were both upstairs on your bed. you, sitting crisscrossed typing away on your laptop, and him laid out diagonally on his side facing you scrolling on his phone.
every now and then you would look up from your screen and see him looking down at his phone, seeing the light illuminate his handsome face.
oh yeah, you also had an excruciatingly huge crush on jaemin.
it started back when you were in 5th grade and he stood up for you from boys teasing you at recess. there was something about it that made you see him in a different light ever since that day (now being a sophomore in college) but you would never tell him. you liked what you had with him; it was something not everyone got the chance to have.
breaking you from your pause in typing, your mind having wandered, you hear his phone it the bed and a frustrated groan from him.
you looked up questioningly.
"could you please give your attention to me now?" he sat up and scooted next to you looking over your shoulder to your laptop. he leaned his head on your shoulder, causing your heart to twinge with affection. he had always been comfortable being affectionate with you which only made it increasingly harder to conceal your feelings all these years.
you grinned at ahis pouty tone.
“you sound like a child,” you said and tried to focus on your laptop again.
you heard him scoff next to your ear. "even still, you've been on there long enough," he countered. he shifted his head and rested his chin on your shoulder now. jaemin glanced at your screen seeing a bunch of words typed that he didn't care to read.
"just let me get this done, it's for school, and right now is the only time i have the tiniest bit of motivation," you groaned yourself, knowing that you really didn't want to do it either.
jaemin raised a brow at your words. "is it really that important that you can't even spare a minute to talk to your favorite person?" he said as he slowly shifted closer trying to get comfortable. he didn't really care if you were trying to focus or not.
you sighed. "just 10 more minutes, then my attention is all yours, okay?"
he let out an overdramatic groan before reluctantly leaning away. "fine. 10 minutes, that's it," he pointed a finger at you. he watched as you went back to typing, trying to focus and understand what you were doing, but failing miserably. his main focus was on the digital clock in the corner of your laptop watching as the minutes slowly passed by.
soon enough, the promised 10 minutes passed by and he spoke up. "finally," he sighed and crossed his arms over his chest. "times up, now your attention is all mine," he smiled like a kid.
you sighed as well and stretched your back. "yeah, yeah." you brushed off and glanced on him. seeing the way his brunette hair fell so perfectly over his eyebrows, you looked away.
shutting your laptop, you put it on your small nightstand, while he moved to sit in front of you mirroring your position.
"at least now i don't have to share your attention with a damn laptop," he grumbled, causing a laugh from you.
"since you wanted it so bad, now you finally have it," you teased smiling at him.
"alright, you make it sound like i was begging," he scrunched his face.
"weren't you?" you asked. you both always enjoyed the playful banter between you guys. there was almost never a day where you didn't.
he thought for a moment. "okay, and your point?"
you shook your head with a content smile before moving to get off your bed.
"where are you going?" he asked sounding almost fearful of your leaving.
"to the kitchen, jaem, i'm hungry," you said motioning to the door of your room.
"you would rather go get food, than be with me? i'm hurt," he said in a dramatic tone, putting a hand to his heart.
you rolled your eyes and started to walk out of your room, "i'll be back in a minute,"
he watched you walk away until you couldn't be seen anymore and leaned back on your bed. laying on his back he waited (im)patiently.
while you were in the kitchen, your parents told you they were going out to see some friends over dinner, and would be back around 10pm. saying goodbye, you took your plate of snacks back up to your room.
by the time you returned, jaemin had flipped over on his stomach with his feet hanging off the bed. you smiled at the sight, seeing his face squished against a pillow. moving towards the bed, you set the plate down and climbed onto the bed sitting over his legs.
him not reacting, prompted you to scoot up further and sit over his butt, with your hands on his back lightly. this is what made him speak.
he lifted his head to look back at you and rolled his eyes, yet making no effort to move you off. he secretly enjoyed the way you were sitting on him all casually. "𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 are you doing?" he asked feeling your weight on his butt.
"sitting? what are you doing?" you asked with a slight smile, playing coy.
jaemin rolled his eyes again, shifting a little to get comfortable under you. "do you not realize that you're heavy? if you were anyone else, i would've complained and made you get off,"
you raise a brow. "i am not heavy," you say hitting his back.
he let out a pronounced 'ow!' then looked back at you through the corner of his eye. "don't hit me! and you are heavy, especially for my poor back," he whined in a mock-suffering tone.
"maybe you're just weak," you said shrugging and slightly rubbed his back instinctively.
he perked up at this. "i am definitely 𝘯𝘰𝘵 weak," he argued suddenly getting an idea. was it a good one? maybe not but he'd figured he'd risk it anyway. somehow, he managed to swiftly roll over onto his back, keeping you up right. the movement catching you by surprise as you now sat straddling his lap. he hands casually going to your hips, keeping you stable.
"i think you forgot who the stronger one was, love," he smirked up at you, as you stared with a dumbfounded look back at him.
you decided to keep your cool as best you could. 'whatever," you brushed off before reached to the table to get your plate. you assumed he thought you were trying to get off, as his hands tightened slightly on your hips.
you leaned back how you were, missing the way his face contorted a little at the movement. placing the plate on his stomach, not wanting to hold it, he speaks up.
"admit it, you weren't expecting that were you?" he continued to smirk up at you.
"no, i wasn't," you admitted, but your expression not faltering.
he watches intently as you start to eat some of your snacks, as if you were sitting at the kitchen table.
"you know you really have no idea what you do to me sometimes," he trailed taking in your details. your shorts, which had ridden up due to the way you were seated, your hair that was in what you called your 'signature style', and the way you seemed so unbothered.
"what are you talking about?" you question keeping your eyes on the plate, not daring to look at his eyes in fear of heat rushing to your cheeks. even you couldn't believe how calm you seemed on the outside, compared to your heart that was currently racing.
he chuckled at your obliviousness, his hands fighting the urge to move to your thighs.
"you're sitting on top of me right now, looking like that, eating food, and you're still gonna ask me that question?" he questioned with a slight hint of disbelief in his tone. he tried his best not to let his eyes roam over your body.
you think his words made it all actually click. the fact that you straddling your best friend's lap right now finally making you realize the situation. usually being something a couple would do you pursed your lips. "well you seem perfectly fine," you deflected.
he watched as the realization sunk into your face and scoffed at your words. "i look perfectly fine to you?" he chuckled glancing at the plate conveniently on his stomach for you.
looking down, you noticed the slight difference in his eyes. choosing to ignore it, you spoke again. "yeah, you look like normal jaemin to me," you shrugged.
he snickered. "well thanks for letting me know i look like myself," he said sarcastically before moving his hands up just slightly, almost as if to test the waters.
"always here for you," you smiled. you felt his fingers move, trying to ignore it. feeling his touch there was not something you weren't used to, yet it was different this time. which again wasn't something friends did.
jaemin chuckled at your words, his thumbs still gently caressing your clothed skin. "when did you become so snarky, hm?" before you could come up with a rebuttal, he spoke up again. "you know, best friends don't usually sit on each other like this, right?" almost like he read your mind you paused.
"i'm aware, which is why when i'm done eating, i'm getting off," you said, as if it made the situation any better. and to be fair, he was the one that put you two in that position.
smiling at your response, he raised a brow. "and what's stopping you from getting off right now, if you're so aware of our situation?" he teased, his hands tightening on your hips slightly.
you motioned to the plate that was still on his stomach. "i'm eating, duh,"
laughing at your casual attitude and excuse, jaemin kept his eyes on your face.
"most people also don't eat sprawled out on top of their best friend?' he kept his tone light and teasing, finding the whole thing amusing. he definitely wasn't complaining about the slightly intimate situation you were in.
once again shrugging you glanced at him. "since it seems to bother you so much, why haven't you told me to get off?" you raised a brow.
jaemin looked back up at you, a slight smirk playing on his lips as he replied. "who said it bothers me? i was simply pointing out the regular best friends sit," he shrugged in return. though, his thumbs still stroking your hips, betrayed his more innocent words.
you paused thinking for a minute. "if you think about it...a lot of things we do, other best friends- probably don't," you trailed thinking of the countless other times you two could've appeared like a couple.
he chuckled, nodded in agreement. "yeah, you're right.. we're almost too comfortable with each other for 'just best friends'," he said, knowing in his mind that he didn't mind.
you spoke up quieter this time. "maybe we should...change that," you said, almsot done with your assorted plate of snacks.
raising a brow in curiosity, as he spoke. "change what, exactly?"
"the way we act, idiot. what else?" you glared playfully.
"you're awfully sassy for someone who's sitting on top of me, you know that right?" he said with a small smirk, his fingers tracing little shapes on your hips.
seeing you only shrug in response he speaks again. "you're so casual...acting like it's the most normal thing in the world to sit on your best friend,"
"you're casual too," you pointed out, locking your eyes on his. "letting your best friend sit on top of you like this,"
"touche," he narrows his eyes.
looking back down at your plate, you give him the last of your snack, him opening his mouth to take it from you. (again something a little too intimate for people that weren't a couple)
"that felt awfully intimate, too...almost a couple like thing?" he added with a playful hint in his tone. he knew that he silently enjoyed that too, though.
you laughed lightly. "we just cross all kinds of boundaries, don't we?" you asked while picking up the plate from his stomach and setting it aside. as you were done, you reluctantly started to lift off him.
jaemin's hands gripped your hips a little tighter, silently telling you not to get up.
"you don't have to get up just yet, you know..." he trailed.
"don't i?" you asked, however, stopping your movements.
"he shook his head no. "not really, no. i don't mind, love," he said with a smug look on his face.
"you should," you countered, but nonetheless, sitting back how you were.
jaemin, chuckling at your response, moved his hands up a little to rest on the area just below your shirt. "why should i? you were perfectly comfortable where you were,"
you rested your hands on his stomach, which you noted that was quite toned. "it should bother the both of us actually...friends don't do this, not even the close ones like us," you somewhat rambled.
he smiled at your slight denial. "you're right," he paused. "but then again, we haven't ever really been a normal pair of best friend's have we?"
you tilted your head. "what do you mean?"
jaemin held a soft smile o his face as he spoke. "well, we're extremely close, to the point we don't mind being physical with each other like this, i could go on," he squeezed your hips a little before continuing. "we both know that we act more like a couple than just friends,"
"hm," you hummed before looking down, and picked at a piece of lint on his t shirt. now lost in thought, you don't hear him until he squeezed your hip. "what's going on in that pretty mind of yours?" he asked, his usual tender yet slightly flirty tone present.
"nothing really...it's just- it's nothing," you said keeping your eyes down. your conflict evident in your words.
watching you for a moment, he took in your expression. "well then it's obviously something. c'mon, talk to me," he urged, gently coaxing you into telling him what it was.
pursing your lips, you looked back to his eyes, thinking for a moment. "well, like...hypothetically, i was just wondering if...like- if this is how it would be if we were a couple...or dating,' you revealed, struggling to find your words. "that's all,"
he was intrigued, yet surprised to say the least. a small smile hanging on his lips, he asked, "and what was the conclusion of your 'hypothetical' wondering?"
smiling a little yourself you looked up at him again. "i didn't get that far,"
"well, if we were a couple, would you be sitting on top of me like this?" he asked wanting to continue the thought.
after a moment of quiet, you spoke softly. "probably...would you let me sit here if we were together?"
he smirked thinking about your question. "yes, of course i would. as often as you want. you wouldn't even have to ask, honestly." his words making your stomach flip. you couldn't believe you were having this conversation right now, much less while sitting on his lap.
you laughed and thought looking up. "let's see, what else?"
chuckling along with you, jaemin thought too. "well, for starters, i'd hold you like this even more...and touch you whenever i wanted to,"
rolling your eyes you spoke. "you do that anyway,"
he chuckled at your reaction. 'true, but it would be different with you as my girl rather than my best friend," his thumbs still continuing to trace small circles on your skin.
you felt your heart flutter at the mention of being his girl., even if it was hypothetical. "hm," you hummed and straightened your back, sitting up a little.
"you were imagining yourself as my girlfriend, weren't you? you liked the sound of that?" he teased, catching on to your reaction.
you scoff and countered him. "obviously, i had to with what we're talking about right now,"
chuckling, jaemin knew you were deflecting from the truth. "oh c'mon, don't deny it, you know you liked hearing yourself being referred to as my girl,"
"you're full of yourself," you teased, fighting the flush you felt rising in your cheeks.
he laughed along with you before teasing again. "can you blame me when i have a pretty girl sitting on top of me?" he was shamelessly flirting at this point.
"shut up, and stop flirting," you point.
jaemin shook his head with a smile. "no i don't think i will. not when i have you all flustered right now from that flirting,"
"oh, so you admit you are flirting?" you asked raising your brow.
"of course i am, that's what i do," he admitted. there was a short silence before he spoke again eyeing you closely. "i want you to admit something too, though"
you felt your heart beating a little faster. 'okay.." you narrowed your eyes. "then i'm gonna put my plate up,"
he nodded once before speaking. "alright, answer this then: do you like the thought of being my girlfriend? hypothetically speaking, of course," he asked looking up at you.
you looked to the side already knowing your answer but trying to find a way around admitting you liked it, even not hypothetically. "i don't particularly mind it, no,"
smiling warmly, jaemin caught on to your attempt to down play your answer. "yeah? i think you like it more than you'd like to admit," his fingers pausing then slowly tracing along the skin of your thighs. the feeling making you breathe in.
you shrugged. 'maybe i do, but it doesn't matter because it's all hypothetical," you smiled sarcastically and quickly got up from his lap before he had the chance to keep you there.
"wait-" he called and grabbed your wrist just as soon you stood up from the bed. you turned back to him, with the plate in your other hand. "why can't it be real? not hypothetical, but real. us dating," he asked searching your face.
'jaem, are you crazy? it's me, you don't wanna date," you laughed brushing it off. you didn't know why but you couldn't accept the idea that maybe your crush on your best friend wasn't so one-sided.
you moved out of his grip and started out of your room down the hall.
jaemin's expression faltered a little as he got off the bed to follow you. "why wouldn't i wanna date you? you're my best fried. i know you better than anyone. and not to mention, you're incredibly attractive-"
"we're not having this conversation," you cut him off, as you walked down hall to the staircase. jaemin followed close behind, determined to talk about this. he caught up to you as you made it down the stairs into the kitchen. "yes we are. why are you so against the idea of us dating? i don't understand." he crossed his arms.
putting your plate in the dishwasher you spoke. 'because we're best friends," you said before standing back up straight and looking at him across the counter.
jaemin let out a frustrated sigh, his expression still firm. "that's not a valid reason. why does that have to get in the way of us being together? we're already so close and comfortable with each other," he paused walking around the counter to you. " plus, think about it, wouldn't being best friends make it better? we already know each other so well, so that gives us a strong foundation to build from," he explained.
you sighed. "it's...what if it didn't work out? i don't want that to be the reason i lose you...our friendship means too much to me to take that risk," you said breathing out. you said that, but you knew this conversation would change your friendship no matter what.
jaemin's expression softened at your response, understanding the thought and point behind it. he took another small step closer, his voice softer now. "i get that, i really do. the thought of risking our friendship is scary. but you have to think about the fact that we already risk our friendship by flirting with each other. and blurring the lines of friendship and something more." he paused, his eyes locking onto yours. it's already there- the risk," he added. you knew he was right but still. sighing you rubbed your forehead. "that's...different," you still argued.
he shook his head chuckling. "no, it's not different. and i think you know that." you looked up at him conflicted, yet you still didn't know why.
"deny it all you want, but what we're doing already has the potential to ruin our friendship. so why not take the chance, and go all the way?"
you tilt your head. "what? and i mean- are you saying you would have a relationship with me? a romantic relationship. you would want that?" you asked needing the clarification.
jaemin's expression stayed earnest and and serious as he spoke. "i would love to have a romantic relationship with you. i wanna spend more time with you, take you out, hold your hand, kiss you-" he listed. "is that what you wanna hear?"
you shook your head. "no, you don't jaemin.." you denied it for some reason, despite the flutter in your heart.
he sighed, getting frustrated with your denial. "yes i do. i really do. you keep telling me how i feel, as if you know better. but the truth is i have never wanted to be with someone as much as i wanna be with you," he confessed. you froze. he stepped forward again, now standing so close, he could feel your body heat.
you didn't understand why you were going against him. against your heart. you knew you wanted it too, if not more. but you just couldn't.
jaemin watched you close, seeing the turmoil behind your eyes. he could read you like an open book, knowing that you were struggling with your thoughts.
"you know we want the same thing. why are you fighting it? what is holding you back?" his voice holding frustration, but still gentle. he brought his hand up slowly putting it on your cheek.
you wanted to lean into his touch. instead you continued to fight it. "i can't do this with you, jaemin. we've already talked about it too much," you sighed and stepped away from him, moving out of the kitchen.
jaemin watched you you walk away, feeling a mix of frustration and disappointment. he followed after you, voice firm. "why can't you? why are you so determined to deny what right in front of you? what we could have together?" he asked almost sounding hurt. you turned around, now at the bottom of the steps. "because i'm scared, jaemin!" you raised your voice a little. ""i'm scared it won't work out, and i could lose you. or that, i'm not gonna be good enough and someone better comes along, or i won't be a good girlfriend, or-"
"hey, hey...shh," he cut you off, grabbing your arms grounding you. his face softened. "you have nothing to be scared of, okay? i'm not gonna get tired of you and there isn't anyone better for me than you. do you hear me?" he asked, searching your eyes.
keeping your eyes on his, you nodded slowly but didn't speak. at your lack of response he gripped your arms a little tighter.
"i need you to believe me. you have to understand that you're everything i've ever wanted. we just need to take that leap," he paused, his thumbs rubbing your skin soothingly.
"trust me, love. trust me the way i trust you,"
looking between his sincere eyes you nodded more sure this time. sighing you speak. "okay," goosebumps rose on your skin from his touch.
a small wave of relief washing over him as you spoke. "good, that's good. i promise you have nothing to worry about. we can take things as slow as you want, but i wanna be with you. i want you to be mine," he said full of emotion.
feeling your heart thumping loudly in your chest you keep your eyes locked on his. "i wanna be yours too.." you mutter softly.
jaemin couldn't believe that he was finally hearing those words from you, as his own heart raced. "say it again," his voiced just as hushed as yours. his hands slowly moved from your arms to your waist, pulling you closer.
leaning into his touch, you spoke. "i wanna be yours, jaemin..and i want you to be mine,'
his heart soared as he heard your words, his arms wrapping around your waist fully and pulling you even closer to where your bodies pressed against each other.
"you have know idea how long i've waited to hear you say that," he confessed looking down at you, admiring your features. you smiled up at him, finally feeling your tense resistance from before, slipping away.
"yeah?" you asked with a small smile.
"yeah," his voice filled with certainty. "now, you're mine, and i'm yours. only yours," his beautiful smile flashing, as he gazed down at you.
after another couple seconds he spoke up again. "can i do something, i've been itching to do for a while now?' he asked with a, now teasing, smile.
"what?" you tilted your head looking up at him, your arms having found their way around his broader shoulders.
"promise you won't hit me?" he says with a cheeky expression. his tone was kept light, yet there was a hint of something else. a desire; a want.
"depends," you narrow your eyes at his change in tone.
he chuckled then spoke as he leaned closer. "guess i'll have to take my chances," he said while glancing down at your lips before crashing his to yours. the feeling catching you slightly by surprise, but nonetheless, you melted into him.
feeling his lips move against yours, creating a spark in your stomach. you broke it leaning back slightly, his forehead leaning against yours. his eyes still looking down at your lips before leaning back in, capturing your lips again. before you knew it, his hands moved from your waist and hooked under thighs, pulling off the ground. you broke the kiss once again with a small gasp as he carried you the stairs with a teasing smile on his lips.
"what are you-what are we doing?" you laughed, clinging to him.
"exactly what we talked about earlier," he smiled as he made it you your room shutting the door with his foot.
let's just say, ‘sitting’ wasn't the only thing that happened.
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