#but I haven't posted them yet
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Hello, I've already said how amazing and super beautiful your art is, I love your style, I have two questions: were your favorite drawings, and what are the drawings or characters that you found the most difficult to draw?
Thank you so much <3
My favorite drawings... Well, the funny thing is that I'm always pretty proud of (most of) my art so it's a bit hard to decide. I like any illustration with Jamil I've made xD
For a quick list of my favs: Liongarb Jamil, Wish Upon A Star, Manipulation Gang, OB!Idia, Rook, OG N2 illu
The most difficult characters to draw are:
-Idia, because of his damn hair
-Vil, because pretty boys are difficult to draw several times in a row
-the twins, don't ask me, I just can't get their proportions right. Damn asparagus need to stop growing.
-Ortho, because ROBOT
And the arts I struggled the most with were: all the damn OB (have you seen how intricate the designs are?!), forehead kissing height (because I'm bad at drawing height differences between characters), Wish Upon A Star (because it was rather intricate) and Shroud hug (because they're both hard to draw!)
(No, Liongarb Jamil wasn't that hard to draw, just very long.)
#that's just the art I've already posted#i've made some slices of life doodles that I'm very proud of too#but I haven't posted them yet#mello's drawings#twisted wonderland#twst#ask me anything#jamil viper#leona kingscholar#vil schoenheit#n2 squad#idia shroud#rook hunt#ruggie bucchi#jade leech
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
[plain-text version of this post can be found under the cut]
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
Plain-text version:
Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
P.S. Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
#hlep#original#mental health#my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it#i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support#and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of#huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the#longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel#i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop
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mourning black and the death of ideals
#i haven't moved on from this yet. btw. i'm still here#finally decided to draw the thought i've been ruminating over for days on end bc it's like a parasite eating away my brain#stated this on the initial post i made days ago but there's just smt so gut wrenching and sickening#about how dazai will have worn black exactly twice in his life: once as a member of the mafia and now at kunikida's funeral#a color that initially signified devotion to the mafia and his demon prodigy alias now signifies his grief#him having to wear black again at the funeral of another doomed fatalist who chose his heart over his survival. his own partner.#kunikida's death being so reminiscent of the tragedy that initially caused him to defect and flee#and everything tying together full circle and effectively breaking him#asagiri rly said fuck knkdz it's doppover we lost gang 😭😭😭#why did bro leave that fucking notebook behind#fool. do you know that angst potential you have left me to work with?#love never won in bsd. it lay dead and festering#i don't know how much longer i can keep saying i miss them. i'm going to kill myself if he doesn't come back#i've never wanted something to be death bait so desperately#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#bsd#dazai osamu#osamu dazai#kunikidazai#knkdz#kunizai#(??? technically. its implied anyway)#lotus draws
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Some Fords! (and Martin K Blackwood is also there)
#Some Ford wips I'm working on! I'll probably post these all seperately later. I dunno yet. just wanted them out of brain jail#The TMA crossover drawings are inspired by a fic which I cannot find the name of right now BECAUSE AO3 is DOWN????#anyway I got more drawings for it I'll post all together later#also I haven't listened to protocals yet and I need to relisten to the og so I hope I remembered Martin's level of lonely avatarship lmao#Also I just think Ford would be a bit mean to himself. ESPECIALLY his immidiately post Fiddleford leaving self#conflicting thoughts of 'I cant risk changing the timeline' and#'I was a miserable self centered idiot and Im afraid I still am so I need to to put my younger self down to feel better'#Gravity falls#Stanford pines#ford pines#young stanford pines#gf fanart#fanart#fan art#my art#digital art#martin k blackwood#the magnus archives crossover#Edit: the fic was 'earth becomes sky in the most literal fashion'!!
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hold on I'll make this my personality for 3 months
#i cannot get over how phoenix slowly started appreciating apollo throughout aa4#THE END OF AA4 WHERE HE SAYS “THEY'RE IMPORTANT TO ME TOO” TO THALASSA IN CONTEXT OF TRUCY AND APOLLO#I'M CRYING PHOENIX#it took you 2 YEARS to tell him that Yes you believe in him#at least it actually helped apollo here but you really should use your time wisely lmao#(why haven't you told Them they're siblings yet. apollo is out of the fucking country now what have you DONE)#ace attorney#phoenix wright#apollo justice#gattocatto's silly posts#gattocatto's ramblies
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Making Incorrect H:SR Quotes Until I Run Out of (hopefully) Original Ideas - Pt. 6
[Pt. 1] [Pt. 2] [Pt. 3] [Pt. 4] [Pt. 5]
#hsr#honkai star rail#hsr incorrect quotes#hsr textpost#hsr memes#honkai star rail memes#hsr meme#honkai star rail meme#boothill#hsr boothill#argenti#hsr argenti#sunday#hsr sunday#aventurine#hsr aventurine#black swan#hsr black swan#argenhill#boothill x argenti#i love their 'guns n' roses' ship name a whole lot but im not trying to unintentionally put this in the actual band's tag lmao#i dont have a good concise title for this one its just like. 50% Boothill and 50% my other fav hsr men. thats it thats the theme#also. dont fuckign come at me like 'but the 6th one isn't accurate! he wasn't born in a test tube!!' listen. i know.#he was found abandoned in the snow or smthn idk i haven't dug into his lore leaks yet but i Know. the first half isnt all that accurate#but the overall vibes of it are funny enough to me that i had to make it anyways. let's all just learn to suspend our disbelief a bit#for the sake of laughs. also also. hopefully it goes w/o saying but if something ever lacks a source it's bc i found it like that#i always leave the op's handles even if they dont fit the characters but sometimes the posts i find have already had them cropped out#which irks me bc i Try to be a stickler for giving credit. but anyways. enough overthinking the making of these silly memes#also. some of these are prob a bit more accurate only if you've seen some of Boothill's voiceline and message leaks but eh its fine
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It's like barbenheimer to me
#I haven't watched either yet#tf2#emesis blue#lil pootis#march 2024 update: you guys have got to stop telling me to watch them this post was made 6 months ago
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(2/2, prev)
got a corpus engineer on board
he really likes warframes
#it's been so long since the previous one but i actually planned these two together from the very beginning#i was thinking that adding a friendly corpus on the orbiter can have some interesting plot#because. you know. warframes have been killing a lot of corpus#i swear that makes sense#but i haven't come up with a lot of plot about this tho#even if i did in this month i still can't draw them because i haven't finish this post yet#why am i doing this in 5am anyways#okay gonna sleep now#warframe#warframe excalibur#warframe gauss#warframe gauss prime#warframe ordis#warframe corpus#my art
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@head-in-the-icloud's Dawn and Dusk doodles from last week's magma. Drawing them is so satisfying istg, my hand cramped really bad but i held on til the end for that sweet sweet dopamine
|| Ref Sheet ||
Also this little ref sheet i made back in December.
#man what a week#<-i've been saying this for the past 3 weeks#i wanna draw i wanna draw i wanna draw#but i gotta work#also i discovered drafts#i never thought of organising my stuff and sorta plan my posts#i have a lot of silly doodles that i haven't posted yet#a lot of wips too lmao#debating whether to make doodle dumps#or to keep doing what i've been doing and associate them with a big illustration#if you made it this far into the tags#well uh#have a very pleasant day#my art#fanart#dca fandom#fnaf daycare attendant#fnaf dca#fnaf security breach#fnaf#fnaf sb#dca au#royal jesters au
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day 260 Swampert
buy stickers, commission a pokemon, or support me on kofi!
#swampert#pokemon#pkmnart#pokemon fanart#pokemon art#pokemonart#i'll post the compilation post for the prev generation and sticker (pre)orders soon! im just busy this week 🙇♂️#(would people want me to put up sticker preorders for stuff i haven't posted yet here--i've been working on some evo lines together#even if its not part of the current gen)#also my queue does run out monday so i might take another break starting then to focus working on some other things#also sorry for not responding to individual asks but unless they're inquiries related to comms i like hoarding them (thank you everyone 🥺!)
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hewwo
#stargate sg1#stargate atlantis#neko atsume#almost cried drawing that cute little fucking tac vest on jack btw. look at him.#not in love with all of the atlantis team especially rodney and weir and tela i fuckim struggled with them#like i'm happy with how they look it's fine but short of sticking a maple leaf on rodney or something you know#it's the props#i couldn't figure out how to make who they were obvious. idk man they're cute and i know who they are I guess. felt the same with sam tbh#giving her a little math sheet felt a lil cheap but you know what it's done i'm not gonna keep workin on these the gateroom killed me dead.#also i woulda done the other sg1 members that show up later but I haven't gotten there yet in my watch-thru.#like i saw them as a kid when it was airing on tv but not yet while actually paying attention to things like the plot#my posts#my art#stargate#the sg1 one was done first so that's why i didn't end up putting a lot of detail into the planet they landed on vs how much detail#i had to keep leaving out of the fucking got dam gateroom why is there so much detail in that room hey guys what the hell is up with that r
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I wanna give them all a lil kiss :3
ooou! kisses for the boys!
Moon: no no no! please wait! i need to clean up clean up!! and then! then...! w-w-w-we should get to know each other first! this! this is too sudden!!
Sun: I do not understand.
Eclipse: Guess you'll have to settle for just little old me for now!
#ask the crab#fnaf moon#fnaf sun#fnaf eclipse#fnaf dca#dca fandom#Have You Eaten? AU#Moon Have You Eaten? AU#Sun Have You Eaten? AU#Eclipse Have You Eaten? AU#crab art#digital art#bright colours#silly guys#in the background#i'm working on some drabbles where you DO get to kiss them#and the rest of my sillies from all my AUs (even ones i haven't posted yet)#it's just#taking a while#there's 16 (technically 18) of them#(+1 more in the works)#so many robots to smooch#might have to separate them into separate posts by Suns/Moons/Eclipses
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why yes i am still drawing bugs
(part 1)
#send help?#tf2#i drew this#if u feel like ur fav is underrepresented check part 1#i know engie is missing i haven't designed him yet im sORRY#an excuse for part 3 hahaw#does tumblr still throttle posts that have links in them?#ah well#blood/#kinda#gore/#kinda sorta
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Sometimes, all I think about is you, Late nights in the middle of June.
🎡🎪
#I realized I haven't posted any proper art of them here yet#leona kingscholar#twst#leona kingscholar x yuu#leona kingscholar x oc#twisted wonderland art#twst art#twst fanart#🐇🦁#bunnwich art🐇#Might as well post this a day late WOOOO
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Hot take: Laios wouldn't actually mind an arranged marriage. Obviously "reluctant royal being pressured into marriage" is very fun for shipping purposes. But I have harlequin blood, so bear with me. Join me on this journey of character theorizing/shipping nonsense that makes it abundantly clear I have a Scrivener document I'm neglecting.
Laios was promised to someone from a young age. He and Falin both were; it's probably how their parents ended up together. They both broke it off by leaving their village, but it didn't seem to be a factor in Laios's own decision. And when Marcille, presumably, asks about his hypothetical love life (bicorn chapter), he not only brings it up readily, but actually seems kind of flattered? lmao
I love when smug Laios comes out. Underrated factor of Laios's personality for me is how much he enjoys being seen as cool. I think you'd expect Laios to be embarrassed or uneasy over this line of questioning, and the fact that he isn't is fun to me.
So when Yaad and his other old advisors bring up his need for a wife, Laios is ready to go along with it. Not necessarily thrilled by the prospect, but he was raised to think of marriage as a business arrangement you do because it's beneficial for your household/bloodline (as was often the case historically). He's already made the big step to claim a throne, and the idea of becoming village chief after his father seemed to have been vaguely in the back of his head all his life. Besides, if he has to do it anyway, I think he'd take comfort that there was a formalized process for an otherwise socially messy undertaking.
This dovetails neatly with my personal headcanon that Laios is gay but unaware of it. He comes from kind of a repressed culture- or at least I can imagine he does based on context clues- and has spent most of his life being ostracized in one way or another, feeling like he's on the outside of humanity. So he doesn't realize that his lack of attraction to women is unusual- he assumes that nobody really enjoys romance that much. It's not like his own parents married for love. It's just something people play up for stories, right?
It's all tangled up with his fraught desire for human connection and platonic companionship anyway. Meanwhile he's blithely unaware that the things he says about Toshiro are not normal bro things. Oh you'd totally marry Toshiro, Laios? Tell me more.
I see this in Marcille too. Firstly due to her unstable development, which has only recently allowed her to reach maturity (I headcanon her as somewhere between 20-22) and secondly due to her being a half-elf (infertile+a too-long lifespan), I think she has the expectation that she's simply not destined for love. The half-elf character she relates to in her favorite books says as much. So she, too, confuses a genuine lack of heterosexual attraction with the belief that this is just because of her half-elf status distancing her from it. Plus, she spent over a decade as a student/researcher in a nice little sheltered academic bubble, at an all-girls academy populated by adolescents. She's the most sheltered of all the characters: she's only spent the past year in the "real world", and she still focuses all her romantic attention on living vicariously through her favorite characters or her friends (except for Falin, conveniently!).
And Marcille would absolutely want to live vicariously through Laios and his future wife. She would not want him to go through a dispassionate formalized process: she wants her bestie to have a fairytale romance! What is the point of being a heroic king in a mythic castle if you can't even get a love story for the ages out of it?
This would result in a lot of Laios meeting with eligible bachelorettes at Marcille's urging, looking to Kabru for help the entire time and being grilled by Marcille afterwards about what he liked best about each girl. "She had nice, um, teeth?" They're both so close to getting it.
Kabru, meanwhile, is agitating for Yaad and the other advisors not lock the country into a hereditary monarchy, they have the chance to do something radical here, to break away from the systems that the elves and dwarves uphold. At the very least, let Laios marry for love, or formally adopt an heir and name them his successor if he wants, he's already sacrificed enough for the sake of Melini. Don't make him jump through these circus hoops for the chance of some trade agreements, we can get those without a royal marriage. And even if Laios was willing to go along with it, he does look at Kabru like he's his hero for sticking up for him.
The vague unhappiness Kabru feels at the idea of Laios being married off is easy for him to ignore. Kabru didn't actually get better at honoring or even recognizing his own wants just because he's moved past the dungeon. And Laios hasn't gotten the hint about his crush on Toshiro and is still 50/50 on saying casually shocking things, so when he remarks that he doesn't need a wife anyway when he has Kabru, he has no idea why that gets him the looks it does. After all, where he's from, men marry women to run their households, but Laios has castle staff for that, and Kabru is handling the rest?
That comment alone ticks one month off their collective gay awakening countdown.
Anyway. How many repressed gays in their twenties does it take to run a country?
Answer: Yaad can tell you.
#dungeonposting#DUNGEON MESHI SPOILERS#I always have to use that tag for the dumbest reasons. because of my harlequin blood.#Labru#you get that tag because that was the point of my post it just took awhile to get there#also pretend I made some kind of joke with a pun about screwing at the end. believe in me.#Golden Country trio#^tag for ME. rotating scenarios with them in my head is a personal treat.#I haven't figured out where Kabru falls yet#he's very bad at introspection and very good at denying himself#but god knows what a guy like Kabru who moves through society the way he does experiences#several possibilities present themselves and I haven't yet decided which one is most plausible. or funniest.#pairing: to be human
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every day is the worst day of his life and he's so tired and he hates his job and they won't even let him smoke cigarettes (by @kalidels)
#wolf 359#w359#doug eiffel#art#THANK YOUU... I LOVE THIS ONE SO MUCH I MADE A NOISE OUT LOUD WHEN I SAW IT#HE'S SO MISERABLE. he's like a shelter dog. he's in an ad for the aspca. he's like that one post where someone's coworker told them#he was having a bad day and they said 'it can't be that bad you haven't started howling like a sad dog yet' and then he did#he's soooo sad he's so sad. wrapping him in a blanket
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