#but I do miss it a lot
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I have been trying to get back to drawing, so have a Minnie Mouse!
#my art#minnie mouse#house of mouse#yes this is from the ladies night episode cuz that whole mortimer mouse song still lives in my head. they were too good#oh and HI#I've been living under a rock I have no idea what's going on on tumblr anymore#but I do miss it a lot
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lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)
if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.
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no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.
I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.
I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.
If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.
#cw: suicidal ideation#cw: suicide#cw: self harm#cw: mental health#cw: depression#i made the balloon the main representation of my self destructive urges for a reason but im not going to explain it#i tried to keep a lot of the details in this vague#it would be my worst nightmare if this comic encouraged someone to hurt themselves#so. please dont#for a long time even the thought of making this comic felt so insipid and narcissistic#with the state of the world as it is#having the only threat to your life be yourself felt so privileged and trite and shameful#but doing this comic made me sit down and process things in full#and im just. very grateful i didn't give in to my thoughts back when i sincerely felt i'd be more useful to the world dead#i also feel the need to say that this wont represent everyone's battle with mental illness. its unfortunately different for all of us#there is no fix-all#and im afraid this might be one of those comics that either resonates a lot or misses the target by a mile#i made it for myself foremost. and now that its done im glad i did it#thank you for reading#and please stay alive#stillindigo art#stillindigo comics
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Sometimes I really miss RP.
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i’m working on more writing and hope to get at least something down soon. kind of concerned about the AI shit that’s going on with tumblr right now but i guess there’s not much that can be done. feel free to send asks with thoughts you have and want me to bounce off of, or if you have anything in particular you’d like me to write about.
#the legend of zelda#tloz#to add on i have been focusing on other interests lately too as well as trying to cope with my physical health#so writing isn’t a high priority right now#but i do miss it a lot
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charm stat at debonair ‼️‼️
#WOW WHO WOULD HAVE FUCKING THOUGHT THEYD BE MY FAVORITES. THIS TOTALLY WASNT EXPECTED. NOT AT ALL.#i have lots of persona art its just uncolored dw#doing the shujin trio next i miss them so bad☹️☹️ also i need pegoryu content to stay sane and alive#anyway they're like. actually fucking insane 💀💀💀💀#like lawlight level toxic yaoi its so absurd#like i was like damn soukoku is intense WHO ARE THESE FREAKS#WHY THE FUCK ARE THEY LIKE THIS.#ACTUALLY FUCKING INSANE. LIKE EXTREMELY MENTAL AND SICK IN THE HEAD.#AKECHI IS A FUCKING PSYCHOPATH#god they actually make me so fucking AUAUAUUUUUUUUUGHHHHHHH#i NEED to finish royal shidos palace GUTTED ME#they were initially so funny to me bc right off the bat you can tell how much of a FREAK akechi is just paraphrasing hegel#and being so ferevently obsessed with ren its like bro why is this guy straightup dickriding us for telling him we like our eggs well done#ANYWAY their dynamic always felt so sad to me bc it was akechi just desperately clawing for what ren had the entire time ☹️#and the more he realized how worthless he was in comparison the more mentally unhinged he became until he actually broke#me when the trope is “the love was there but it wasn't enough to save them” 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 (FUCKING DEVASTATING)#ermmm anyway yea they're neat. ig#persona 5#persona 5 royal#p5#p5r#ren amamiya#akira kurusu#goro akechi#shuake#akeshu#lotus draws
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staaaartin thaa streaaaammmmmmm
#art !!#mcyt fanart !!#technoblade#or like doodle more like#hehe helloau#i was sad while posting rhis on twtter so i didnt have the enegy to post it here but. here i am!!!!#hallooooo#:3333#waves waves#i miss this guy a lot#also do u guys like my lines i picked out the brush for this so carefully... brining my vision to life
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happy dragon age month, i miss my homies so I doodled them in some simple camp clothes (bc im bg3pilled)
#it was fun getting my hcs down for their faces heights and such#im sorry about alistair. i love him so much but hes just a tshirt and jeans guy to me#i miss my beautiful wife dragonage origins.....#yeah im playing datv by which i mean watching my gf play it#but i never finished dai so i lack a lot of context and also its been a while so i dont rememer a lot of lore#so what i rly need to do is replay all the games and then play veilguard#but overall dao is king i know that much. not to be a hater from the start but miss me with that mcu dialogue#and i just prefer the tone of dao#dragon age#dragon age origins#dao#leliana#morrigan#zevran arainai#alistair theirin#art
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CHAPTER TWO | The Scientific Method
FORGETTABLE-AU (page 73-77)
* His brother is annoying.
[BEGINNING] [PREVIOUS] [CONTINUE]
#alahskwj FINALLY#okay so I HAD TO DO HALF OF THE COLORING AND SOME LINEART ON MY TABLET AND IT WAS SOO ANNOYING#BUT!!! I FINISHED!#akshwkdjwj#SAANSS#I missed making him talk with lowercase#It feels like a crime making him use proper capitalization sometimes😔😔😔😔#just wanna clarify#Flowey knows Sans but Sans doesn't know Flowey#Flowey used to reset a LOT when it came to him so#in Sans memory he only know Flowey from that one time he tried to steal their souls and from what Papyrus has told him#He doesn't really trust the guy but#He does trust Papyrus#Flowey is so funny#He is SO bad at not sounding suspicious LMAOO#dumb#I don't know how Sans is using sunglasses either🤩#he's trying to enjoy the sun#he spends a lot of time there lol#QKWGWKDJ#So glad the comic is back but I am SO BUSY rn#I think the next pages might come late too.....#forgettable-au#forgettable-au-comic#undertale au#undertale#sans#flowey#sans undertale#undertale comic
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Your Etho design is everything to me, he is just so...!!! I will be thinking about Etho with goggles for a very long time now thank you
Oh Anon he is everything to me as well... Etho doodle for you
Real talk, it's interesting how my Etho designs sorta change over years(maybe it's the art style?) but the goggles stay the same, except now they're not round anymore, more minecraft-ish to me me thinks :P
#hermitcraft#ethoslab#ope ask#ope art#I missed drawing etho a lot alot alot a lot a lot a lot#do ppl still remember me
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i feel like many people use "straight"...wrong
it's used a lot to mean cis, het, allo, perisex, etc.
basically just not lgbtq+ at all
but that's not true
trans people can be straight and lgbtq+
intersex people can be straight and lgbtq+
neopronoun users can be straight and lgbtq+
arospec people can be straight and lgbtq+
acespec people can be straight and lgbtq+
polyamorous people can be straight and lgbtq+
genderfluid, bigender, and other gender non-conforming people can be straight and lgbtq+
people who are biromantic, panromantic, etc. and heterosexual or vice versa are still lgbtq+
and there are so many more identities that can absolutely be both
straight does not mean not lgbtq+
#queer#lgbtq+#queer pride#trans#neopronouns#aromantic#asexual#polyamorous#genderfluid#bigender#biromantic#not a rant#and please don't come at me if i missed something#or did something wrong#i really tried to include most people i could think of#if you have a suggestion lmk but pls don't attack me#:)#i think someone has said something like this before#and if anyone could find the og post that'd be cool#cuz i was thinking about that post a lot while doing this#lgbtq+ pride#babna 😨#intersex
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ok someone please correct me if i'm wrong but am i weird for thinking those 'audiobooks don't count as reading' posts are ableist as fuck????
#ramble#my first thought was like: how is this even a debate what about blind people. not every book comes in braille but MOST have an audiobook#or dyslexic people#you still enjoyed the book!! you still absorbed it!!! you got EXACTLY the same thing as people who read the words!!!#how does it not count????#i guess you miss out on the 'learning new vocab' you get through seeing the words but also#i don't really do audiobooks but i do a lot of podcasts esp fiction podcasts#and i have ABSOLUTELY picked up new stuff from there that helps with my writing#someone please explain how this is even an argument of COURSE it counts????#idk in my opinion finishing a book means 'i put the words in my brain and i thought about them and i enjoyed a story'#not 'i held a stack of paper in my hands for a bit'#i'm v lucky that i do have time to sit and read. and whenever i commute anywhere it's public transport so i CAN bring a book with me#but if i didn't have the free time or had to drive for hours everywhere i would be STOKED to still get to enjoy books#it's been REALLY bothering me lmao idk why i feel so strongly#for some reason it's giving the same energy as like. being told you can't take a comic or manga from the library bc it's not a 'real' book#of course it's a real book it's a story somebody wrote down#i can see this spiralling into 'if you have a kindle you aren't reading'. you have to sniff the paper. feel the papercuts
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I don't have a caption for this one tbh
#bitts posts#my pics#nsft#ns/fw#i took SUCH a good pic last night but its just full closeup on both holes so i suuuuuper cant post it#but man. if i could#anyway you get a lil dimmly lit tease instead#been thinking a lot about the kind of dominance thats both gentle and overwhelmingly present#dominance like a kiss on the forehead and a hand over your nose and mouth yknow??#i miss having someones full attention on me in that heady possessive way that says theyd do anything for me just as much as theyll break me#do you guys know what im talking about
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Ghouls night out
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#Scopophobia#Don't be mean Lan Wangji - the dead girl aesthetic is a curated one. Support women's rights to look dead!#I have been waiting for this scene for ages...the ghost girl entourage is such a good look for WWX.#And by gods does the audio drama actually do something interesting with one of them.#Namely that we actually get to see WWX talk with them and learn about who they were and what they left behind.#I love necromancer characters but it's way too common for them to be like “Go! Ghost no.145!” like they're a pokemon#and not...you know...someone who had a whole life that they left behind.#I love me a necromancer who has an awareness to whose soul/body they are using. It adds a lot of flavour!#MDZS is a little hit or miss with this. I think the fans do a lot of the work with making Mo Xuanyu a bigger character.#Yi City has this in spades. Even though we don't individually get character backstories#We get many painful reminders about how these 'corpses' were people.#We also get a few lines about how WWX used whatever corpses he could get his hands on (including grandparents - Woof!)#MDZS often (but not always) likes to remind us that every sacrifice and every ghost was a person.#It is so close to nailing the landing regarding the deconstruction of the necromancer character.#Anyhow. You may have noticed the uptick in quality in the last two comics. Rule of three means next one is going to be a treat B*)#See you all very soon!
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What I wanted so badly was for Mary to learn about her boys from Cas. Like that night where Cas finds her when she can’t sleep and she expresses that she just doesn’t know anything about her sons since she missed so much?? All I wanted was for Cas to sit down with her at the table and just start telling her about them. Basic stuff at first: their favorite foods, their sleeping habits, the stuff he’s just observed by being their passenger for years.
And then I want him to say something totally Cas, like “Dean always wears more layers but that’s because his body naturally runs two degrees colder than Sam’s. But that’s normal for him and not indicative of any illness, so it’s nothing to worry about.”
And as they talk, it starts to get a little deeper, and Cas tells her more. He tells her about what she missed, about all the horrible things that happened to her sons and how they coped; how it changed them. And he tells her about Sam, he does, but really it ends up being all about Dean.
He’ll tell her about how Dean clenches his fists when he’s upset, even as he tries to keep his face impassive. About how Dean drums his fingers on the steering wheel when he’s anxious. He’ll tell her about Dean’s nightmares, about the ways he’s chosen to cope. He’ll tell her how to know when to approach Dean and when to give him space, how to gently acknowledge what he’s feeling without pushing him too far.
And with every word he says, Mary’s curious head tilt from when she’d seen them hug in reunion turns into a bone deep type of certainty. Because Cas is telling her things that only someone who paid special attention would notice. He’s telling her things that only someone very, very close to her son’s heart would know.
Cas will tell her the cliff notes of what they’ve been through; will tell her how the whole world looked to Dean and he rose to the occasion over and over again. He’ll tell her about Dean’s doubts in himself and then vehemently declare them as wrong and explain, at length, why. He will tell her about the people Dean has loved— the people who loved him like he was their own— and lost. He will tell her about Bobby, Ellen, Jody, Donna, and Charlie. He’ll tell her about Claire, too, and how Dean stepped up.
And the whole time, Mary will have this realization that oh, she may not have been around to guide and protect her sons, but there was always someone there to care for them and support them when they needed it. She will realize that she and John may have left them, but they were never alone.
But more than that, there was someone there for Dean. Someone picking Dean over and over again while Dean picked Sam, or the world, over himself. There was someone fighting for Dean when he wasn’t fighting for himself. There was someone who saw Dean, and loved him unconditionally.
Sitting across from her, at the asscrack of dawn, filling her in on all the things she missed was every mother’s dream: someone who loved her child with the kind of devotion that would break the world. And from the sounds of the stories she was being told, it did break the world. Someone whose love is entirely untainted and comes without any strings attached.
It’s so clear to her as she listens to Cas talk that Cas loves Dean with no expectations. That loving Dean is something he just does, like he doesn’t know how not to love Dean, like the possibility of not loving him never occurred to Cas. He loves Dean in a way that Mary knows can and will soothe Dean’s sharp edges and battered heart. He loves Dean in the kind of pure way that tells Mary that it will continue to endure and overcome everything without ever diminishing, even the littlest amount.
Mary, through tears, will tell Cas how she always told Dean that there were angels watching over him. And before Cas can make some comment about Dean being the Righteous Man and the interest of most of Heaven, she will place a hand over his and give him a motherly look that will convey all the things she’s not sure how to say— and the things she’s not sure Cas is ready to hear yet. And Cas will flush and look away, mumbling about how her son is very special to him.
And when she pulls him into a hug and murmurs thank yous into his shoulder, she will be comforted in the knowledge that her sons turned out to be wonderful men, and that they managed to stay together through everything. She will be comforted to know that no matter what happens, no matter her shortcomings as she tries to fill a role she never meant to leave, Sam will have Dean and Dean will have Cas.
And this time, when Cas tells her that she belongs here, she will believe him. And she will tell him that he belongs here, too.
And when Dean wakes up a few hours later and wanders in to find Mary and Cas still chatting over the table, he’ll be surprised— but pleased— to find Mary looking more at ease. He’ll be pleased when she gives him a warm hug and pats him on the cheek and tell him with all the sincerity that only a mother can muster that she’s glad that he met Castiel. And when Dean agrees, a little confused, Mary will just smile at him.
“I always said I’d like a third son.” She says, “so give him a reason to take our last name, won’t you?”
And Dean will splutter and turn fifteen shades of red as he steadfastly doesn’t look at Cas but mumbles something that suggests he’s not against the idea at all.
And Mary will laugh again and wink at an equally red Cas before heading towards the kitchen like “Cas said waffles are your favorite, so I hope you’re hungry!”
#mary Winchester could have been a good character#and the Mary&Cas friendship could’ve been everything#Mary deserved to learn about her sons from someone who loved them#and she deserved to see how they were never truly alone#like that whole scene I was screaming for Cas to talk to her#Cas helping Mary navigate the stress of situating herself into her boys life could’ve been so powerful#because he had to do that and he’d know#and Dean having cas to keep going to as he tried to cope with his own side of things???#im just saying#this show robbed us of a lot but this is one thing I feel especially bitter to have missed out on#Castiel#dean winchester#mary winchester#spn#supernatural#destiel#deancas
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thinking about the way ghost doesn't hesitate to start killing shadows when graves betrays them but soap only takes one hostage
you can almost hear the voice in his head telling him it doesn't have to be this way; they can still talk it out
"i'm calling shepherd"
his first instinct when confronted with betrayal is to play it by the books: to go up the chain. that goes against everything we've seen him do. he bucks authority at every chance except for the one time he's confronted with the barrels of his allies' guns
he wants a peaceful resolution; for the first time we've ever seen, he doesn't want violence to be the answer. there has to be another fix, a solution that doesn't end with him killing the same men he's been working with; his friends
nothing's happened yet
it doesn't have to go this way
but ghost has been betrayed before. he knows the way this ends; either with him six feet under or his enemy
he doesn't hesitate
it's only when they knock alejandro out that soap shoots; when they spill the first blood and cross a line they can never come back from
only when ghost orders him to run and he has to cover his retreat
and somewhere along the line, between civilians’ screams and taunting voices, between his shaking breath and ghost steady in his ear, that naivety is stripped away; his trust turned to teeth that he uses to sink into throats of men he'd have given his life for
"be careful who you trust, sergeant; people you know can hurt you the most"
he's learned the price of trust
just like ghost did
but unlike ghost, he has someone to guide him through the aftermath
"good advice, It"
#im gonna add these to my notfics on ao3 i think i have a Lot of these floating around#a bit shorter than my other metas but i think its something that gets missed when people talk about alone#soap is a violent man#his career literally trains him to shoot first ask questions later#and yet he still tries his best to avoid blood when faced with betrayal#and you realise it actually does fit him#soap cares about the men he serves with#he wants to save the men at the crash site he checks on a downed soldier he asks about civilians about alejandros family#hes very tuned into the people around him#and he cant turn that off until hes forced to#until graves gives him a reason to hate him#and all of that previous care and consideration goes out the window#‘makes me want to commit a few war crimes of my own’#dont cross soap#you want like what happens if you do#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#we’re a team. ghost team#talk meta to me#soap cod#john soap mactavish#ghost cod#simon ghost riley#ghoap#ghostsoap#soapghost#meta#phillip graves#graves cod#save post
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(He did it on purpose to piss them off specifically) I think the MADS people are easily the most wretched horrible people in this story. They are also, unfortunately, potentially some of funniest. And I wish them nothing but misery for my own entertainment. [Original Post]
#one piece#one piece fanart#one piece comic#me art#miss buckin was going to be here at first too but it's funnier if she's absent as usual. freeloader queen#I know I say 'contender for worst thing I've drawn' a lot but. this is one of em#do I even want to tag these people#queen one piece#queen the plague#caesar clown#vegapunk york#vinsmoke judge#dr vegapunk#MADS one piece
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