#bump of chicken reference!

[ashxketchum]

DIGI SAILORS REPORTING FOR DUTY...AND A LITTLE FUN (｡•̀ᴗ-)

[spiderscribe]

started watching the tf anniversary video and ten seconds in i was like "wait. wait i know this song—"

[fallloverfic]

(For the question in the tags about the band name): I'm seeing some debate on this, but one explanation I see from a Japanese site is this:

"BUMP OF CHICKEN is a word coined by the members. Drummer Hideo Masu wanted the band name to be “~of~”, so ` ` counterattack of the weak '' and ` `blow of the coward .'' . . . The idea is that even cowards like us can do something."

The original Japanese phrase used was apparently, 弱者の反撃 or 弱者の反撃 ("counterattack from the weak man", or as some sites have phrased it, "Cowards Fight Back"). In English, counterattack/blow/fight was translated to "bump", and "weak"/coward" was translated to "chicken".

That seems to be the popular consensus about the name origin, though I'm not really seeing a citation for it anywhere. So yeah, it doesn't refer to food.

I think it's pretty funny that the opening theme for the Dungeon Meshi anime is by a band called Bump of Chicken

because you see, the characters in the anime. I think they would eat, they would, they would eat a bump of-

[karvroom]

TRAINING IN SESSION

teen!Hawks x reader

⟢ summary: A year after the Hero Public Safety Commission took Keigo in to undergo harsh training to become an undercover double agent, you were introduced to the same program. You grew up together, practically inseparable since the moment you met. Now, you’re teenagers.

══════════════════

“Please, one more. I swear I’ll go easy.” Your partner in crime, Hawks, whined. He bumped your arm as you chugged from the cool water bottle. His tone switched to one of playfulness, “Oh, c’mon, are ya chicken?”

Hawks was trying to get you to spar with him again. Even though you’ve gone on for countless rounds and you were exhausted to say the least. You both sat on the ground beside one another, backs pressed against the cushioned wall. You straightened your shoulders, bringing the plastic bottle away from your mouth and screwing the lid back on.

You scanned the plain gray room. Rubber mats covered the entirety of the walls and floor, making it comfortable for a harsh landing. The dimly lit area looked almost black and white in your vision.

“You’re one to talk, bird boy.” You looked him up and down, referring to the crimson wings on his back. He wore a black compression shirt, which showed off how much muscle he had gained since you were little.

You met when you were both seven—Hawks was in the program a year before you were put in. Now, you were seventeen, which meant one year closer to becoming full fledged Pro Heroes.

“You know I hate when you call me that.” The blonde complained, his cheeks turning to a hue of pink as he turned his head away from you.

You giggled, finding it cute when you flustered him. Ever since you were little, you had a crush on him. Maybe it was because you were separated from the rest of society and hadn’t been exposed to anyone your age before except him. So, what? To you, he was the perfect guy.

You sighed, putting your hands on your knees to make it easier for you to stand. You hopped onto your feet, turning to Hawks who still hid his face. You held a hand out for him to grab, “One more round, ‘kay? If I win—”

“If I win I get to take you on a date.” Hawks teasingly smiled, revealing his playful grin.

You had this thing ever since you were little; he promised to take you out on a date once you were both in the real world. You refused his offer every single time. But he knew you. He knew you would go back on your word and he would eventually take you to a restaurant on the beach. Hawks remembered the one time you mentioned how much you loved the beach and he kept that in his memory ever since.

You rolled your eyes, “Fine.”

“Really?” He eagerly asked, earning a shy nod in response. Hawks traced the outline of your body, his eyes widening. His pupils nearly swallowing his golden irises as he admired your beauty. Your luscious locks that you refused to let anyone touch (he was the exception). He loved how they fell in your face while you looked down at him. The way you were so touchy with him, yet refused to flirt when he obviously was. Your lips curled into a smile and that did it for him. He felt his face start to heat up again.

Hawks had taken a liking to you. Though, he knew you “secretly” liked him for much longer and he only recently started seeing you as something more than a friend. He was falling. Hard.

He groaned at how easily you made his heart melt. Slapping his palm into your own, you pulled him up from the ground, turning to walk to the center of the room. You readied into a fighting stance, bending your knees, putting your fists up in the air and straightening your posture.

You cracked your neck as you asked, “Ready?”

“You bet.” Hawks gave you a single nod with a shit eating grin, copying your stance. Surprisingly, you were the first to initiate fire. You ran at him, aiming a punch right for his head. He dodged with ease, dropping to the floor to kick at your legs. You jumped over, effortlessly.

You were both used to each other’s fighting techniques that it was hard to ever declare a winner fair and square.

You managed to land a kick to his side, using just enough force to stumble over his own feet. He grunted, holding a hand over his rib. Once he regained balance, he attacked you, attempting to grab your wrist. You held your hand high in the air, out of his reach. With his arm stretched, he revealed his side to you. You used this opportunity to make use of your other hand. You attacked his torso with tickles, your fingers running over the clothed muscles beneath.

Hawks let out a childish laugh, trying to maintain his composure. He brought his arm down from trying to reach your hand, defending his stomach by placing his arms at his front.

You smiled, seizing the moment. You swung your leg underneath his figure. He jumped just in time, using his wings to fly higher in the air and towards the high ceiling.

“That’s not fair. I thought we agreed on no quirks?” You crossed your arms over your chest as you pouted to the blonde. You looked so much smaller than you really were to him from the ceiling. He wanted to scoop you into his pocket and take you everywhere with him—as corny as that sounds.

“Life isn’t fair, sweetheart.” Hawks called from above, waving his hand in the air. “And your dirty little trick wasn’t very fair either. Hypocrite.”

“Whatever. I would’ve won, anyway!” You shouted to him, cupping your hands over your mouth. He found it funny how dramatic you were.

A few crimson feathers fell from the sky. You observed as they were soft and flexible at first, suddenly turning into a deadly weapon. The sharp edges of the plumes flying at your figure. Hawks was careful not to actually do damage.

You gasped as his feathers shot you back against the wall, pinning you to the cushions by the extra fabric on your clothes. Hawks swooped down from the air, cockily strutting to your trapped body.

“You sure ‘bout that?” He tilted his head to the left, followed by an arrogant smile. Hawks leaned in close to you, his face only inches from yours.

You felt your breathing speed up and your heart rate start to rise. You didn’t want to—you had to remind yourself not to look at his soft, pink lips. If you did, it would be over.

Hawks felt powerful in this situation. His figure towering over your own as his gaze met your own. Strands of his overgrown, blonde hair fell onto his forehead as he was further entranced by your beauty.

Words couldn’t explain how badly he wanted to kiss you. He’d been dreaming of a moment as intimate as this with you for a while now. Usually, he would grab a fist full of your hair, smashing your lips against his own as he melted into your touch. Now, he was at a standstill unsure of what to do. The tension between you felt like static electricity.

He let out a huff, speaking in a cocky tone, “Looks like I just won myself a date.”

[celestiaras]

‧₊˚✧ ❛[ surrounded by stone ]❜

ft. yu. q wilson x f! reader — krisis, nijisanji en

╰₊✧ while out exploring with wilson, you find yourselves trapped in a 1x1 hole with no tools to escape┊2.6k words

contains: smut!! switch wilson, reader┊takes place on a hardcore krisis server, reader is a member of krisis & shorter than wilson, minecraft mechanics, forced proximity & awkward sexual situations, begging & some teasing, mutual masturbation (fingering & handjobs), willy overthinking & being cute, implied polykrisis at the very end, his clothing actually might be innaccurate idk how all that works from the reference sheet, very very rushed ending

➤ author's note: i love this picture of willy, he looks so cute and shocked. i really went back and forth about how to go about this piece, but i hope that the finished product is okay!! this piece was long overdue and should have been finished months ago…

₊˚ʚ 💌₊˚✧ dedicated to the wonderful @vezalust, i didn’t forget!! i just struggled with motivation, but it’s finally done & i hope you’ll still enjoy despite how long it’s been since i promised it!!

“AHHHHHH FUCK GET ME OUT OF HERE!!”

“SHUT THE FUCK UP, YOU ARE TOO CLOSE TO MY EARS FOR THIS!”

this was just supposed to be a simple adventuring trip to map out new territory and gather the necessary resources to progress through the world, but it all went horribly due to rotten luck. really, what are the chances of discovering three zombie spawners within a hundred blocks of each other? finding something like that would be next to impossible and would even be a great find for an experience farm if you were well-equipped, but unfortunately for you, it wasn’t as impossible as fighting off such a large wave of the undead. even if you two were heroes, you only had iron tools and partial armor and getting swarmed by the horde made combat extremely difficult. the rest was a blur, running around like headless chickens and blindly swinging at enemies that got too close while screaming various swear words.

by the time all of the action, you found yourselves trapped in a one-by-one crevice that wasn’t even tall enough for him to stand up straight, making him slouch so that he wouldn’t bump his head on the ceiling. since neither of you could get close enough to light up the dungeons, you resorted to digging into the side of the cave wall instead and wilson followed you as he placed blocks behind him to shut them out… except he wasn’t looking in your direction, continued until he backed up into you and realized that you were both stuck.

your tools were one block away from crumbling in your hands and you frantically began to search through your inventory, looking for something to fix your pickaxe with or to make a new one entirely, but it was just filled with treasures you gathered up to this point. truly, you were blinded by greed to collect new riches and completely forgot to grab extra essentials like wood. (although now that you think of it, you would need to break at least two blocks to place a crafting table and work on it, such an unimportant thing that is now inconceivable to get out of this cave.) “wilson… please tell me that you still have your pick on you…”

“so i… uh…” with how close you were to him, you could hear him gulp and shuffle around to tug on his collar. “i sort of freaked out and… threw it at a zombie… with my phone too… i don’t have any crafting materials either…”

your device lit up the dark space as you squinted and quickly sent the other two your coordinates, but it died in your hands before you could send the text explaining what happened. “well… it looks like we’re stuck here until vanta and zali wake up since it’s way past midnight,” you groaned. “we told them that we would be back in the morning, so they’ll probably figure out that we’re lost and will look for us then…”

the rough wall of stone was nothing if not uncomfortable to lean against, but you were barely a few inches away from the blonde with your hips still pressed together despite your best efforts to give the other a shred of personal space. it was getting uncomfortably warm from the shared body heat and you could only imagine how hot wilson must be getting in his hoodie, but the stifling silence was honestly a worse fate.

krisis have known each other for a little over a year and were one of the tightest-knit groups, yet here you and the hitman stood like complete strangers stuck in an elevator. it’s safe to say that neither of you could get a second of rest like this despite the long day of traversing uncharted lands, so this awkward position would remain until you two were saved. the idea of starting a conversation crossed your mind but was quickly crushed by the possibility of it falling off and making everything worse, so you decided to just keep your mouth shut and sort through your inventory.

although it had only been a day, the loot piled up in your pockets was impressive now that you were properly tallying it up with stacks of iron and dozens of various gems of ores— this would certainly be able to gear the team to travel across the fiery nether once ready and might even help go towards finding the end portal. you could already picture the gang full-clad in shiny diamond armor with the slain ender dragon at your feet, but maybe you were getting a bit ahead of yourself. for now, building a proper home and creating the gateway to what was essentially hell would be massive accomplishments.

you paused for a moment when you felt wilson shuffling around and realized that his breathing had steadily been getting heavier. peeking over your inventory screen with eyes that were now more adjusted to the dark, you could faintly see him biting onto the thick fabric of his outerwear’s hood. he seemed to be trying to suppress himself in a way, but was struggling terribly and sweating like a sinner in church even though you two had been still for nearly an hour. you tilted your head in concern, “wilson… are you alright? did you injure yourself earlier?”

“i-i’m fine… just…” he let out a shaky breath, his ears burning with embarrassment as he hoped to whatever god there was out there that you haven’t noticed anything. “could you m-move your leg?”

“oh, sorry! wait, let me…” you tried your best to scoot away from him, but the space was so tight that there wasn’t anywhere to escape you. pushing your hand against the course-textured ceiling, an attempt was made to push yourself back from his personal space, but to no avail.

all this while, wilson felt like he was going to explode. yes, he didn't want to realize that he had a raging hard-on— who would be able to bear the humiliation when he couldn’t run away from the situation? however, oh god, your lack of awareness was going to be the death of him, he really needed you to stop unknowingly rubbing your thigh against his crotch and making the problem worse. he’s so fucked (as vanta would say, he’s so cooked that he’s fried a crispy golden brown). what kind of depraved pervert he is getting a boner from being so close to one of his friends— you were never going to talk to him again after this if you find out!

he didn’t want it to happen this way, he wanted to confess his feelings to you in a proper way like a gentleman and go on a few dates before hopping onto anything like this. to jump onto you like a dog in heat before you even know about his feelings was so humiliating and would definitely dash any of his hopes of ending up with you because of how pathetic he was, but he wasn’t in the right mindset to think any more than a minute into the future. “i-i’m sorry…”

before you could ask him what he was talking about, you felt him cup your face in his hands and pull you towards him for a hungry kiss. your eyes widened at the sudden action, feeling him kiss you like a parched man wandering a desert finding an oasis. once you felt the prominent bulge protruding from his pants, you didn’t cringe in disgust like a normal person but rather became dizzy with want. you didn’t start this with any sinful intentions, however, you certainly weren’t going to take it back and reject the advances of someone you’ve fancied since the very beginning.

his hands wandered around your body, tracing over your skin and leaning into your warmth as his tongue darted out to explore your mouth. you couldn’t see a thing, but it only heightened your other senses from the vague smell of his cologne mixed with sweat and the heat burning in his fingertips. it felt unreal, the lines of reality and dreams getting blurred with every passing second. you didn’t want it to end nor did you want him to stop, you just wanted him to ease the aching pain in your cunt and to kiss you like it meant everything to him.

it did mean everything to him, but he was just too horny to focus on the sentimentalities that he was robbing your first time together of in a lust-induced haze.

he parted his lips from yours first, resting his forehead on yours and trying to catch his breath, yet continuing to press kisses onto you in shorter, more frequent intervals. he held you so close to him, it was almost like he was about to implode if he didn’t have his way with you right now, pleading and whining like a little puppy for your permission to escalate the situation further to chase his own high and hopefully yours too. a simple nod would suffice, anything would suffice, and hearing your soft pleas was more than enough to knock over the already tipped scales.

in his rush, he didn’t even bother to try taking off your top. he would only pop off the buttons by accident and ruin the garment without light or night vision of any sort to see just how beautiful your naked-upper form was, so there wasn’t much reason to do so. he would just have to make do with his vivid imagination reinforced by his other senses until next time (if you decided that you would still associate with him after this, that is…), running his hand over your naked skin and gently groping your soft chest. he’s so clumsy in his movements, like a high school boy who is going through his first time with another, but it really just a result of nerves from his affection for you.

you grabbed his wrist to stop him in the act, making him flinch in worry that he did something wrong, but you led it to where you wanted him most. “please,” you breathed, “i know we’re gonna be stuck here for a while, but i need you now.”

oh, if only you could see the expression on his face, you would tease him so badly for it! he just had to blink a few times to process that and got to work, pulling down your pants along with your underwear to finally access your heat. his throat became dry as the overwhelming desire to have you on his mouth and to taste your arousal washed over him, but there wasn’t enough room for him to kneel even if your legs were tossed over his shoulders, so he could have to settle for the next best thing as he circled your clit with his thumb and adding more pressure when you asked him to press on it harder.

“mmhh, fuck…” you threw your head back at his fingers beginning to work you open, slow at first, but steadily became erratic as you wrapped your arms around his neck to cling onto him. he seemed so shy about doing this despite initiating all of this, but hearing your cute little moans of pleasure gave him more confidence about his actions. your hands slipped under the material of his hoodie and managed to find the zipper of his bodysuit, capturing the metal between your fingertips and undoing it before he could notice until the fabric fell a bit below his waist.

he isn’t very built and on the slimmer side since his job is more reliant on speed and agility rather than strength, but you felt as if it balanced the playing field for you to have an equal opportunity to dominate him as he could with you. you traced a line down his torso and pulled at the elastic of his boxers, his breath hitching as your wrapped your fingers around his throbbing cock and experimentally started to jerk him off. if he wasn’t already, he was now putty in your hands and immediately bucked his hips into your hand in an almost desperate state while the pace of his fingers faltered.

you couldn’t help but smirk at his state just from your touch and tease him for it, “god, you’re so needy— how long have you been waiting for something like this to happen?”

he couldn’t keep his voice still and kept stuttering, how could he sound any different when you were stroking him so sweetly like that? “i-i don’t even know—mmhh— it feels like f-forever…”

forever almost seemed to be laughable since it’s just been a year and a few months since you first met, but it really does feel like it’s been much longer than that. there’s always been chemistry between the two of you which was a bit stronger than the other members, one that always had you gravitating towards the other. you frequently got teased by vanta and zali over this special connection several times and had no doubt that wilson went through the same treatment, now realizing that they probably thought something like this where hidden affections boiled over should have happened earlier.

he was dripping so much that lube wasn’t even necessary, your hand able to slide up and down his cock with ease repeating the motions: massaging his shaft while running your thumb over the leaking tip and smiling whenever he let out a soft whine as the building pleasure released all over your hand. he would have been more embarrassed about climaxing so quickly and easily if he hadn’t already diverted his focus on making you do the same.

his fingers were still halfway inside of you from before, but you still gasped when he resumed his relentless pace like he had never stopped at all and igniting fire under your skin as you clung onto his shoulders. wilson isn’t the most experienced, but he quickly learns what feels best to you based on how loud you’re being: what makes you go quiet versus what makes you shudder and gasp until you finally gush on his fingers.

as the rush of euphoria reached it’s peak then began to settle, you briefly thanked this blocky world for not listening to the rules of your dimension and that this tiny little space somehow contained enough oxygen to last for forever seeing as both of you were completely out of breath. your bodies were sweaty and a bit overheated, but it somehow felt fine since it all happened with him. “let’s just… stay like this for a bit… i’m so tired, and this feels so nice,” you sighed as a spell of fatigue suddenly swept over the two of you, leaning into his chest and letting him wrap his arms around you while relishing in the sound of his rapid heartbeat.

“so, uh… does this mean we’re dating now?” he no longer felt scared that his feelings would be unrequited, knowing that you felt same (he would have to ask later how long it’s been…).

“yeah,” you said without hesitation and placing a more loving kiss on his lips before falling asleep, “we are…” the two of you remained like that for long after the sun rose, not even realizing when your other two teammates exposed you to the light after digging you both up. it didn’t require a rocket scientist to figure out what happened over the past six hours based on the mostly nude state of your unconscious bodies, giving them a good chuckle, something to bully both of you eternally over, and a new awakening of desire that wanted to join in on the fun lit inside of them.

[sethsclearwater]

hi! would u write a fluff with Paul and pregnant reader where he is really happy about it and goes around telling everybody (the elders, Sam and Emily) that they're having a baby at every opportunity he has and everybody is so proud of him. Just some tooth rotting fluff

i love him🥺🥺

...

"isn't she just the prettiest thing you've ever seen?" paul asked jared and sam, happily holding the ultrasound picture he'd insisted you get printed out at your most recent doctor's appointment.

jared laughed, "paul you literally can't even see anyth-" he started, but was quickly cut off when sam smacked him upside the head, eliciting a loud groan from the male.

"she's adorable paul," sam smiled, "they said everything is okay with both of them?" he asked as he leaned up against the counter of his and emily's kitchen, his question referring to you and the baby.

paul nodded, coming to stand behind you at the kitchen island, setting down the ultrasound picture so he could slide his hands over your shoulders to gently rub them, "all good," he reassured, "right princess?" he asked you, leaning down to press a soft kiss to the crown of your head.

you giggled and nodded, sliding your hands over your protruding bump, "all is well with the lahote girls," you teased, squealing as paul leaned down to pepper your cheeks with kisses, "paul-" you laughed, rolling your eyes as he slid his hands down your sides so he could also rest his hands atop your bump.

jared rolled his eyes, going to grab one of the muffins from the plate emily had set down just before running upstairs to check on hers and sam's sleeping toddler. sure enough, emily appeared a few moments later. she was quick to spot the sonogram, immediately stepping over to the two of you to pick it up, "oh my god is this her?" she squealed, beaming at the two of you when you and paul both nodded, paul momentarily stopping his kisses to nod.

"oh she's the cutest!" emily exclaimed, spinning around to face her husband who let out a breathy chuckle and nodded, "we need to have another one," she said, all of you letting out laughs at her comment.

"maybe after olly gets out of this sleep regression phase," sam offered, chuckling when emily nodded, setting the sonogram back down on the island so she could wrap her arms around sam's waist, hugging him tightly.

paul pressed one final kiss to the crown of your head before he was reaching down to grab the sonogram from the table again, "we should send this to billy and old quil, right?" he asked as he grabbed his phone, smiling when you nodded and giggled.

"do you wanna send it? you can totally send it-" he started, quickly realizing you might want to be the one to show everyone the sonogram picture but you were quick to shut down his worries by pressing a quick kiss to his bicep.

"you can send it," you reassured, smiling up at him as he nodded, quickly snapping a picture of your sonogram before he was texting it to old quil (who you were, quite frankly, surprised he knew how to text at all) and billy.

"you two are the cutest," emily mused as she got out of sam's arms to step over to the fridge so she could figure out what to make for dinner, "did you sign up for those birthing classes i sent over to you?" she asked, pulling out some chicken and flour, looking like she was going to be making breaded chicken or something similar for dinner.

you nodded, "just figured it out last night actually," you giggled, "you saved us so much time with that," you added, smiling gratefully over at emily who nodded, smiling back at you.

"they start next wednesday," paul added and sam nodded, both him and emily happy to know the two of you used their recommendation for the birthing class they had used.

"you're gonna love it y/n, they're so helpful and can definitely answer more of your questions than i can," emily explained and you let out another laugh as her comment, both of you well aware of just how many questions you'd texted her throughout your pregnancy so far.

you went to respond to her but were cut off when you felt a soft flutter in your belly from your baby, causing you to let out a soft gasp as you ran your hands down to where you just felt the kick, "paul come here," you said even though he was still standing right behind you, quickly taking his hand and pressing it down where the baby just kicked.

"what-" he started, quickly stopping himself when he realized what you were trying to show him when he felt another familiar kick under his hand, "oh princess," paul murmured, "'s not hurting you, right?" he asked softly and you shook your head, leaning back into his chest as paul ran his hands over your belly, loving knowing your baby was able to somewhat interact with him even from in your belly.

"she's kicking?" sam asked, chuckling when paul nodded.

"oh that is so weird-" jared started teasingly, letting out a loud laugh when paul whipped around to glare at him. you giggled, already knowing paul was going to make him regret saying that.

[sazandorable]

akai shuuichi

For nearly a year now I have been plagued by awareness of and lust for Akai Shuuichi from classic manga/anime series Detective Conan, of all things. It never stops. It keeps getting worse. My friends with me in the fandom are angels of patience, indulgence and gentle teasing, but for everyone out of that loop I need to explain.

Akai Shuuichi.

He's got striking green eyes and identifiably long lashes.

He is so tall, wears leather jackets, and often has one or both hands in his pockets.

He's left-handed.

He smokes.

He drives cool cars.

He has lived in the UK, in Japan, and in LA.

He used to have princess long hair he was super proud about. He chopped it all off after "a bad breakup" (more on this later).

Most of the time he looks like death badly warmed over in a prehistoric microwave oven. Bags under his eyes, sharp boney facial structure that makes his face look like a skull, an entire scene dedicated to him dropping a can of shitty coffee in dramatic slow-mo, apparently out of exhaustion. I want to bundle him in a huge duvet and spoonfeed him chicken soup.

He is so fucking smart.

He is so fucking funny in a deadpan way.

He looks so serious but does the wildest shit like it's a normal (and easy) thing to do.

He is a sniper. An absurdly good one.

Also excellent physical fighter. He's so cool, he doesn't do karate or judo like the protag's close allies or even boxing like Sherlock Holmes -- he does Jeet Kune Do like Bruce Lee.

He is good at everything.

He's FBI, one of their best.

He doesn't say shit but understands everything.

At any given point you have no idea where the fuck Akai is and what he's doing, but he'll always be where he's needed.

Hottest trait: reliable. Unfailingly reliable.

He infiltrated the big bad meanie shadow organisation at the heart of the series' overarching plot and became a very high-ranking member of it.

Now that he's been found out and burned, the common reaction to Akai Shuuichi from members of that organisation is "shit, he's our biggest threat, kill kill kill".

A guy from the organisation once realised he was being chased by the Akai Shuuichi and immediately shot himself in the head rather than deal with him.

Another shot himself after having been dealt with by Akai Shuuichi.

To be fair, it's apparently the guideline of the org to not leave loose ends and not get caught alive, but still. This doesn't happen with other characters.

He was a honey pot.

His seduction method was to let his target hit him with her car and then hit on her when she visited him in the hospital.

He ended up catching genuine feelings for her. Then she got killed, so now he has angst about that.

He refers to wanting to avenge her death and kill the guy that killed her as "I'll make my girlfriend cry tears of scarlet blood in regret for ever dumping me".

He says to himself "Hi, my precious, precious lover ❤" while sniping at the man who killed her through that guy's own sniper scope from over 700 yards away.

Hits him, too. 600+ episodes later the guy still has the scar on his cheek and touches it occasionally.

He also dated a FBI colleague, whom he first met when they bumped into each other and he pointed out she should apologise too because "the blame was 50/50".

She was super offended. And then she dated him.

Another, male, colleague once referred to Akai Shuuichi as "my wife".

The official resident Pretty Boy fanservice man is obsessed with him because he believes Akai caused the death of his own childhood friend(/boyfriend).

It was actually the pretty boy's own fault. For incomprehensible reasons, instead of ever telling him that, Akai "the blame is 50/50" Shuuichi takes on that responsibility and even tells him he still feels sorry about it, and lets this incredibly dangerous man repeatedly try to out and/or kill him and put so, so many people in danger in an attempt to get his revenge. It is all incredibly homoerotic.

He still humiliates this guy every time they meet, and sometimes when they don't.

He's so sweet about so many upsetting things like this or his own honeypot girlfriend incident, but also so ruthless about others. He'll do anything to get a foot into the shadow organisation. He'll use himself as bait. He'll use a colleague who idolises him as decoy (with his knowledge and consent). He'll use a 6yo as scout. He'll use a comatose woman, her little brother, your crush's dad, your dad, his ex, himself again.

"No, Conan-kun, don't get your loved ones entangled into this, what we do is dangerous and sometimes we get people killed. Anyway let's use this entire hospital full of injured civillians for a high-risk trick." - Akai Shuuichi

He's so sweet and also such a dick.

He also has daddy issues because his father was MI6 and seems to have died on the job in mysterious circumstances.

He's an oldest brother.

Because of his choice to start a dangerous job after what happened to his father and various other plot reasons, he is estranged from his remaining family they don't even share a last name anymore.

He and his little sister barely know each other, but she's emulating him and looking for him and trying to know him and it's so sweet. He can't let that happen for both of their safety, but also he's being a dick about it.

He faked his death.

So he's currently on his 4th name (that I know of).

He's now pretending to be a 5 years younger phD student with pink hair, glasses, and turtlenecks.

The turtlenecks are for hiding the fact that he's constantly wearing a voice-changing device. The device is a metal choker.

He's now living his best domestic quiet life at the hero's parents' manor-like house, reading their books and drinking their booze.

The hero's dad, who is a very popular author, wrote a book inspired by him. The book inspired by him got adapted into a movie and won an award.

The hero's mom, who is an incredibly talented and famous actress and a total hottie, has a crush on him. She taught him to cook.

Sometimes he drops by the neighbours' to share a meal he cooked with the old man and little girl living there and the kids often visiting. The kids told him his curry was not that great so he's working on it.

For another meal that failed to satisfy, he read cookbooks then asked an old lady to teach him the special recipe that had emotional value to her.

Man who is good at everything is not good at cooking. So he's learning that. From the women in his life. For the kids in his life.

He's so fond of the hero. They get each other and they don't usually run into anyone who does. They like each other so much. Autistic to autistic communication.

The hero is in the body of a 6-year-old. Akai is so impressed with him and thinks he's so cool and talks to him like an equal.

One time they went fishing and for a cover the hero called him "daddy".

Akai Shuuichi knows he's a weapon of destruction and can do pretty much anything. He's not a brag about it, just practical. He is basically the hero's on-call guard/attack dog now.

When the hero needs help, he calls Akai-san, and Akai says yeah, I followed the situation, I was waiting for your call, I know what you're going to ask me to do. Point me at the target and I'll take care of it.

And then he just does that.

In the latest movie, the hero needs to take care of an armoured submarine that is currently underwater and doesn't get picked up by radards. Akai goes "ok, I can handle that".

He shows up in a helicopter with an American rocket launcher and is like "ok, just show me where it is". The hero just has to light up the submarine for a couple seconds. Then Akai one-shots it. From the helicopter. While it's still underwater.

Then he goes home.

(To the hero's parents' home.)

This is Akai Shuuichi with little resources and lots of constraints, such as being an FBI agent in Japan not supposed to be there or do anything, certainly not use weapons, and by the way legally dead and cannot let the organisation know he's still alive because that would endanger several other people.

He plays the accordion.

[svnaaaaaa]

Monte Carlo : Charles Leclerc AU (Epilogue)

pairing : charles leclerc x fem reader

summary : the married life went well. so is the pregnancy?

warning(s) : another domestic!charles, progress of pregnancy (i literally have nothing to write now), pictures from pinterest

previous : part seven

next : -

masterlist

author's note : in honour of attack on titan's final episode aired, i presented a long epilogue just like how attack on titan ended its series *sobsob*. i had fun doing this series but i realized of how short the story is because i just don't know how to elaborate the story long but long stories can be boring (with my writing) at the end of the day so i decided to end it before it became nonsense lol. thank you for the support that you guys gave me, i hope you guys enjoy it from the first part till now.

tagging : (if you want to be tagged in, let me know)

recap :

"ready to be a daddy, papa?" y/n whispered as she stroked back charles' front hair to the back. "as ready as i ever be maman." charles replied, taking y/n's hand and kissed it.

-

10 weeks into pregnancy, y/n realized that her body is going through some changes and that being her emotions as well. her abdomen is getting a slight bloated as if she was overeating things. just a small bloating, nothing more or less. and since charles have a week off from racing, he decides to bring y/n back home in nice, france for some healing time. lately, charles noticed that his wife is having mood swings moments, where himself was afraid that something might trigger her which he assumed that his wife was stressed while he wasn't home.

"honey, you might want to slow down on those wings. it giving you a bloating tummy already." beau reprimanded as he saw his daughter savouring the chicken wings. which has been y/n's craving lately where she craved chicken wings with spicy honey glazed sauce on it. y/n who felt realiztion hits her hard, she put down the de-boned wing back on her plate and placed the plate on the coffee table in front of her as her eyes were getting tear up. charles comes in the living room and he heard his wife was getting to sob. he immediately went to her side and rub his wife's arms. "y/n sweetheart, what's wrong, tell me." charles hushed as the sobbing is getting louder.

"i'm fat!" y/n exclaimed. "which makes me ugly!" y/n continued and the crying comes in. charles sighed silently as he pulled his wife into his arms and hugged her gently, rubbing her back. "you're not fat and ugly my sweetheart, it just your body is going through some phases as you are pregnant now." charles tried to rationalized which makes beau hit with gulit. "i'm sorry baby, i know being pregnant makes you want to eat everything you want but i am just want you to be aware of what you eat. that's all, nothing harm." beau explained. y/n pulled away from charles' arms and glared at beau, which causing him to stutter and carefully walk away from the living room. y/n starting to sob again and once again, charles pulled her to his shoulder, swaying them left and right.

charles thought of how many weeks more for the mood swings to past by.

"charles, y/n, i'm sorry."

-

as charles making chicken pasta for dinner, y/n who is finished showering, entered their bedroom while patting dry her body until she saw the full body mirror in the room. y/n noticed something different on her body and went closer to the mirror. y/n gasped. "charles!" y/n called. "charles, come quick!" y/n called once again and as fast as a lightning, there charles was, gasping for air as he leaned onto the door frame. "what is it sweetheart, are you hurt?" charles asked, making y/n chuckled. "no silly, look!" y/n exclaimed as she referred to her abdomen, making charles look at it as well. when realization kicks in, charles' eyes enlarged as he approached to his wife's way and saw a small bump. a bump that resides in his baby.

their baby.

"you can touch it you know." y/n chuckled as charles placed his hands at the side of his wife's bloating tummy, carassing it. getting his eyes tearing up, he thought on how he can't wait to meet with the baby soon enough. "hello there little angel, papa can't wait to see you soon. i hope you are as beautiful as your maman." charles said and end it with a kiss on his wife's abdomen.

-

25 weeks into the pregnancy, y/n's abdomen became a bit larger than the last time she realized she had the tummy. this afternoon, pascale invited charles and y/n to her house for a lunch date. as charles went bonding with his brothers at the front yard, y/n, charlotte and pascale were in the kitchen, prepping things before cooking. since charles and y/n were the only leclerc couple that will be having a child soon, lorenzo and charlotte were more than happy to babysit the future baby before deciding to have their own baby, in order to gain some experience. "how's pregnancy treating you y/n?" charlotte asked y/n as she was washing some apples before handing to y/n to slice it up. y/n sat at the island table stool, rubbing her lower tummy looking at charlotte. "it was like a rollercoaster ride to be honest, sometimes i am okay sometimes i am not. and poor charles had to attend to all my ridiculousness." y/n replied as she chuckled at the thought of charles had to find a rabbit meat for y/n to eat it with a sriracha sauce, where charles had to made an order through amazon for the sriracha sauce.

charlotte chuckled as well. "well, he had to since he's also helping making the baby right?" charlotte asked and y/n nodded at the question. "he had to, if he doesn't want our baby to drooling once it was born." y/n said, had a thought of where her mother used to tell a story of a baby that keeps on drooling because the father wasn't able to fulfill the mother's pregnancy craving. once she told the story to charles, at first he thought it was kinda weird and dumb but the thought of having his own baby might be experience with drooling in its toddling years, he couldn't bear to risk it so he just fulfilled everything that y/n craved.

"is it really a thing?" charlotte asked and y/n shrugged. "it can be real, it cannot but neither of us want to risk." y/n replied while cutting off watermelon this time. pascale chuckled. "i also don't want you two to risk anything bad to my grandchildren." pascale informed, stirring her cookings on the stove. both charlotte and y/n looked at each other, just smiling. "will do pascale." charlotte replied. "maman, arthur's here with carla." lorenzo informed as both arthur and carla entered the kitchen and kissing pascale's cheek, carla holding something in her arms. "here i brought some desserts from patisserie riviera." carla informed, placing a box of desserts on the dining table.

y/n gasped as she holding her lower abdomen, alerting everyone in the house. "y/n, are you okay?" charles asked, rushing in to y/n's side and placed his hands on y/n's. "i-i'm fine, i guess." y/n replied in confusion. "it just, i felt something like cramp but it wasn't that hard or painful." y/n continued as she placed charles' hands on where y/n felt the flutter against her abdomen. charles' eyes brighten up at the feel of the small kicks.

"wait, the baby kicked because of patisserie riviera?" arthur asked.

-

amélie was assigned to be the planner of the baby shower and she planned it to be an all-girls party at a venue where charles and y/n held their wedding at. amélie also invited kika, carmen, kelly, rebecca, lily, and basically all formula one drivers' partners. the theme of the party is pastel purple because everyone doesn't know the gender of the baby. the baby gender reveal will be held at the end of the party where the men will be invited right after the party ends.

theme and cake

cookies

invitation card

dining table

backdrop

"okay everyone, gather around here as we are going to play our first game." amélie announced as she stood on a podium with backdrop that she designed specially for her future niece/nephew. the ladies started to stood in front of amélie as y/n took place next to amélie as she linked her arm around amélie's.

"we are going to play our first game, which i call 'play dough babies', where each of you will be given a cup of play dough and the rule is easy." amélie started as she pulled a trolley that have cups of colourful play dough. "each of you need to create the perfect play dough baby where our mother to-be here, will decide the winner." amélie finished and starts handing out the play dough cups. "also help yourself with props in the trolley there to add some bonus points!" amélie added. the ladies in the hall starts to get excited as the trolley were pushed into the middle of the hall and they saw things that they can get creative with.

"okay ladies, you only have 15 minutes to create the most perfect yet creative play dough baby." amélie said as she pulled out a stop watch. "your 15 minutes start, now!" amélie announced as she clicked on the timer and the ladies started to rolling out play dough according to their own ways. "so y/n, who do you think will be the winner?" amélie asked leisurely as she tried not to make things focus on the game. y/n hummed as she looked at the contestants making their babies eagerly. she eyed on kika's play dough baby. "i had my eyes on someone's but i can't tell who." y/n replied as she giggled. "oh-kay then, ladies your time have five more minutes left." amélie announced and she walked around, eyeing the babies.

"time's up! so y/n, please choose your winner mommy!" amélie announced and y/n walked around to evaluate the babies.

y/n smiled genuinely. "without bias, the winner for this round is ... carla!" y/n announced as carla jumped happily and went to hug y/n at her arm as she doesn't want to cause trouble to y/n.

-

five games later, at party is now almost at the end and the men now have arrived. y/n's eyes lighten up as charles showed in her sight. charles saw y/n and walked his way to her. y/n smiled at charles and grabbed his arm, hugging it. charles chuckled at his wife's attitude, stroking his wife's arms around his right arm. "alright, now that everyone is here. now is the time for the gender reveal!" amélie announced and brought in a white frosted cake on her hands.

the guests there were starting to clapping their hands, feeling excited at the reveal of baby leclerc. including the new leclercs, where both charles and y/n is fine with the gender of the baby, as long as the baby is healthy and happy. charles gripped on y/n's hand where he pulled it to his mouth and kissed on it, making y/n smiled at her husband's gesture.

"ladies and gentlemen, may i here invite the leclercs to the podium here and cut the cake to present the reveal of their baby's gender." amélie announced and then both charles and y/n went to the front, onto the small podium that amélie made, hand in hand. amélie smiled at the couple and stood a bit away from where the couple stood. "are you guys feeling excited?" amélie asked, being the great host she is. "are you expecting a boy or a girl?" amélie added. "well..." charles started, as he getting nervous for no specific reason. "we were hoping to get both boy and girl but since there is only one baby here," charles placed his hand on his wife's belly, "we are fine with any of it as long as the baby's fine and y/n have a safe labour soon." charles said as the crowd were awed at charles' reply.

"okay, it's time to cut the cake! which gender will the new baby leclerc will be!" amélie said as both charles and y/n cut the cake and the gender has been revealed, which caused joy among the guests there.

-

38 weeks passed by so quickly and it is time for y/n to be admitting into her labour ward since the baby can arrive soon enough. also she has been feeling mild contractions. right now, charles went off to registering his wife after they got in their ward room.

"have you thought about the name yet?" one of the nurses asked as she was inserting iv drip on y/n's arm while y/n make herself comfortable on a bed that she has been admitted. "yea, we had few names listed but the right one will comes right in when we see the baby's face." y/n told the nurse. the nurse smiled at the excitement of a new mother. this was the first time for the nurse to see new mothers being calm, despite within 24 hours, they had to push a baby out of their uterus.

"all done, if there's any discomfort or problems, please press the button here okay?" the nurse asked and y/n nodded her head yes. making sure that y/n is fine once again, she left the ward room, followed with charles entering. y/n letting out a huge huff of breath. "another contraction?" charles asked and y/n nodded her head yes. "but still, the water isn't broke yet. is it normal?" y/n asked worriedly, making charles nervous and worried as well.

he was a small child when his mother gave birth to arthur and y/n was the younger child in her siblings. none of them experience with childbirth before.

"i guess so, want to take a walk?" charles offered. y/n nodded her head yes.

-

the leclerc couple walked down the hallway of the ward, waiting for water to break and also for dilation. dragging along the iv drip along. "can you believe it char, less than 24 hours we get to see our little baby!" y/n said excitedly even in the midst of contraction. charles smiled at his wife's excitement and admired at how strong a woman is even if she is in labour. this makes charles respect women even more, especially his mum and wife. "we have been waiting long enough now, please hurry up little fella." charles said while rubbing his wife's stomach, causing y/n groaned silently not wanting to create chaos. charles noticed it and pulled his hand away and immediately hold onto his wife's shoulders, fearing that she might fell down or something along the way. charles looked at y/n worriedly, which y/n saw and smiled a bit. "i'm fine, it just the baby can't wait to meet you too." y/n said slowly.

and their walk ended right there, as to the dilation went from 2 cm to 9 cm. that fast huh.

-

charles_leclerc

2,748,916 likes

charles_leclerc Presenting René Jules Valentin Leclerc. I love you my boy, just like how I love your mother ❤️

Comments are off.

yourusername

1,637,729 likes

yourusername rené jules valentin leclerc, reborn youthful and healthy

Comments are off.

-

a/n : the end! i didn't know how to end it so i ended it this way. thank you to all who have been supporting this series from the beginning until now. for now i would like to take a rest from writing because i have been in writer's block mode for a while now, hence the ending. if any of you have any suggestions or request, feel free to inbox me and i will try my best to make it a reality! once again, thank for the support and if you don't mind, feel free to follow me so that you will known what will i write next hehe 🩵

[footballfanficwriter]

Late night cravings

Summary:where the reader is craving  and she wakes Jude up to her her food

A/n: I am well aware of the war that is happening between Israel and Palestine and I just want to say I support Palestine, but I want to let you know that before reading this there will be mentions of companies that are owed by Israel so consider this a warning when reading also the timeline of these events are before the war or the war is nonexistent and is not taking place

__________________________________________

It's 3 in the morning and I'm tossing and turning in bed, I turn to my left and find Jude is fast asleep, how can he be asleep, how can he fall asleep so easily

I sigh, giving up on finding a comfortable position and just lying on my back, my pregnancy bump just slightly peeking out in my line of vision, I stare at the ceiling for a while and think about how life is going to be in a few months, having babies and a  being mother, and in a few years being referred to as mom, the new responsibilities I'll have, I can't lie I'm terrified, I mean you see all these cases of mother's mental health decrease and how they have post partum depression after giving birth, what If I became like that and start hating my babies because of their existence, and those poor children won't understand a thing that is happening, just that their mother doesn't want them, or what if I just get depressed, and the need to do anything just disappears, I mean I can't afford to be depressed, it's going to affect the babies especially when I'll be breastfeeding and all

I sigh again and try not to look at the negative side of the situation, Jude said I should always call him or wake him up whenever I feel like this so he can reassure me and make me feel like everything is going to be ok, but I don't want to bother him, especially when it's so late, he's already got a lot on his plate, I continue staring at the ceiling just tapping on my belly for a while, and that seems to have woken my unborn children because they start kicking, it must be a party in there

"Ok guys go back to bed, it's too early for you guys to be awake" I whisper

I sigh for the 3rd time knowing it won't work

All of a sudden I feel the urge to eat like I haven't eaten in a while, I'm craving McDonald's,  KFC, and oddly enough something sweet, I don't know what but I'm craving something sweet

I try to ignore my hunger but I can't , I use my arms and hands to make me sit up and turn my head towards Jude then sigh again

"Jude"

"Babe"

"Jude wake up"

He wakes up and looks at me with tired eyes

I instantly regret waking him up the minute I see his eyes

"It's ok honey go back to bed"

"No, what is it, what do you need me to do"

"No, it's alright, it's not important anyway"

"Well, it must be if you woke me up at 3:30 in the morning"

"No it's not, go back to sleep, I'm sorry for waking you up"

"You know I'm not going back to sleep if you're not going to tell me what's wrong" he says

We sit in silence for about 5 minutes

"I'm hungry" I say

"Ok" he says getting out of bed finding his pants and putting them, then his socks followed by his shoes and a black hoodie, he then grabs his phone and opens it

"What do you need" he asks

"No, come back to bed, you don't need to do anything"

"Honey I'm already out of bed, you might aswell tell me"

"Ok, I want two big mac's from McDonald's, hot wings from KFC 24 pieces, a medium sized pizza with cheese, chicken pepperoni, apple juice, and something sweet, I don't know what but I want something sweet"

"Is that all?"

I nod and he says

"Ok, I'll be back soon"

He slightly climbs over the bed and kisses my forehead

"Don't feel bad love, I don't mind going out to get you food"

"You sure?"

"Definitely"

He leaves the room and walks downstairs, opens the front door and he's out

It's only after an hour when I hear the front door open again indicating that Jude is home, I hear him come up the stairs, walk down the passage and the door to our room opens

I see him holding take out and he walks over to me and places everything on the bed

"Ok, so I got everything you asked me for but I didn't know what type of sweet thing you wanted so I got you your favorite sweets/candy and your favorite cake, is it too much?

"No no honey it's perfect"

"You sure?"

"Mhm"

"Ok"

"Thank you"

"You're welcome"

He takes his shoes off and goes to his closet to put them away, he comes back and sits on the bed while I start eating my food in silence

I then turn to him and see him lying on his back with his eyes, I place one of the big mac's on his lap and he looks at me

"What are you doing?" He asks

"Have something to eat"

"No it's fine babe go ahead besides you're eating for 3"

"Yes but you still need to eat"

He sighs and takes the burger from his lap and we eat in silence

"You know, we still haven't come up with any baby names" I say

"Babe we'll name them when they arrive"

"We can't name them when they arrive who do you think we are kylie Jenner?"

He laughs at my comment

"Their names have to have Js though" he says

"No"

"Their names will be different but similar"

"Like?"

"What about Ella and Alex?"

"Or Beatrice And Brandon"

"Beatrice?"

"Yeah"

"That's an old lady's name"

"Madison and Mason"

"No, I'm not really feeling it

"What about Brian and Brianna"

"Ok we'll put that in the idea box, it's not bad"

"Really?"

"Yeah, what about Cara and Carter"

"Hmm, Cara and Carter Bellingham"

"Brian and Brianna Bellingham"

"O I like it"

"I know"

"Ok but on a serious note we need to discuss how we're going to raise these kids Jude"

"What do u mean?"

"Ways of discipline, what if they do something we won't approve of how would we react, what if they come out and they're part of the LGBTQ, what then what?"

"Ok, ways of discipline?"

"Yeah, we need to think about those"

"Simple we'll just beat them"

"I'm not hitting my children"

"Fine, then I'll do it"

"Jude"

"I'm joking, we can take away the things the love, like toys ban them from going to friends, you know all the soft stuff"

"Ok what about the age they can Start dating, and being in relationships?"

"Brian can date when he's 13 but Brianna is dating when she's 28"

"That's insane, we going to treat our kids equally, we can't discriminate because of their genders"

"Fine, both at 13 then" he says rolling his eyes at me

"Did you just roll your eyes at me?" I ask

"yeah why, you wanna pull a Christian Grey on me"

"The fact that you can make that reference"

"Yeah, I can"

"Jude we're supposed to be talking about our Future and the Future of our kids"

"Ok, ok sorry"

"Then the LGBTQ thing"

"We disown them immediately" he says in a dramatic way

"Well it won't make me happy either but I guess we'll live with it, they are our children at the end of the day"

"Yeah"

"And the involvement of our parents in their lives, what boundaries need to be set"

"They need to be present that's for sure, buy them gifts and spoil them rotten, I just want them to make a strong connection and bond"

"Yeah that's for sure"

"What about sleep schedules"

"For us or for them?"

"For us"

"We'll take turns"

"One day it's my turn to stay the night with them, then then the next it's your turn, but if it's the both of them being fussy then we can both be awake, and rotate each twin  by the hour"

"What methods should we use If they don't want to sleep?"

"Music, white noises I heard that's good and relaxation for when you're trying to sleep so we'll use that or classical music it's up to them really

"And their sleep schedules?"

"20:00, that's their bed Time, everything must be done before that"

"And sports , that they'll play"

"You already know the answer to that question, I don't even know why you're asking that"

He laughs and I smile at him

"Social media for them?"

"Well considering who their dad is we need them to use other names, and they must be private accounts"

"At what age?"

"14 is when it can happen"

"So social media and phones at 14?"

"Yeah"

"And a trust fund?"

"Most definitely having that, we never know when things go South"

"Ok"

"And I think we should go for Therapy"

"Why, our marriage is not on the rocks"

"I know but I want us to strengthen our relationship and relate to eachother better, you might have things that I do that you don't like and things you do that I don't like, we were very young when we met, and they say time changes people we aren't the same people we were when we met"

"Fine, we'll go"

"And this will strengthen our marriage as well so it's a plus"

"Ok love, anything that makes you feel comfortable"

"Thank you"

"You know I'm glad we're doing this"

"Yeah same"

"That way if any problem is thrown at us we'll be prepared for it"

"True"

He leans in for a kiss and I do the same, I'm about to attach our lips when I feel something coming up my throat

Puke

I quickly open my eyes and run to the bathroom

"Oh wow if I disgust you so much then why'd you marry me"

"Jude"

"No really answer the question"

"It's the sight of your face, it makes me sick

"Very funny"

"It's not a joke" I say brushing my teeth

"Do you wanna cuddle"

"Yeah"

"C'mon then"

I walk towards him and lay my head on his chest and he plays his hand on my belly

"We've got footballers brewing in there"

"Jude, if they choose that they don't want to be footballers then please don't force them or make them feel bad about it or even force them, I want them to make their own decisions

"Fine, but I will be disappointed though"

"Understandable"

[yuellii]

baby, we’re the new romantics !

𝐈𝐍 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐂𝐇 some born-rich, noisy man falls for a completely normal ( maybe struggling ) woman

feat. childe, referred to as ajax

wc. 2.7k

note. gn reader, modern au, references a scene from I Love Yoo, this is a little birthday fic for one of my very best friends in the whole wide world : @vivinens !!

To put it bluntly, it sucked working at McDonald’s.

Other than the fast-paced environment and the tough remarks from rude customers, what arguably sucked the most was that he worked in the building just across the street. Literally just a few steps and you’d be at risk of seeing him.

It wasn’t that you hated Ajax ( okay, maybe you did a little ); he was a fun way to wind down in-between classes sometimes at university because of his loud personality. And, he was attractive to stand next to, you’ll give him that in addition to being a very understanding friend. But seeing him in the workplace is quite possibly the last thing you could ever want to ask for.

What made matters even worse was during your desperate job search last month, when you got a recruitment offer at the place he worked at. You thought it’d be some small thing like where generic college students worked, not some big multi-million firm in this massive building with workers walking around in suits and pencil skirts galore. And of course, when you met with the mean recruiting lady named Rosalyne for your interview, it was impossible not to spot Ajax at the corner of your eyes with a goofy smile on his face.

And when Ms. Rosalyne went back to scold him after your interview, it was more than obvious you were only here because he pushed your application.

How embarrassing.

“You can try again!” he said to you in good spirits in the university courtyard one week after. The two of you were sitting together as the sun was setting on campus, having both finished all your classes for the day. “They’re opening another clerical position soon since our current one is leaving, apply then!” And to you, he was acting all completely normal in his normal young-adult way, meanwhile you were trying to erase the image of him in a suit from your head.

You sighed, “I don’t think the high-class life of business is for me yet, Ajax.”

The roll of your eyes caused him to visibly deflate. Just how obsessed was he with the idea of you getting hired? “But I want you to work with you so baddd…!” he groaned, dramatically shoving his hands onto his face.Then he leaned back forward, slumping until his forehead came down to rest on your shoulder. Such an attention-grabbing act of depression—you almost came to entertain the idea, too.

“I don’t even have office clothes,” you scoffed, bumping him off your shoulder.

He yelped from the force of your push for a moment before he grabbed your arm, pulling it so harshly with such a force that had you clashing right onto his chest ( Yeah, friends, or something like that ). And even as you began to punch on his chest in protest, he just hugged you tight and whined, “I can buy you some! You’ll fit right in—and I get to see you every day at school and at work!”

Seeing him every day sounded like hell, you were so sure this man was insane.

“You are not buying me office clothes!” you denied, still trying to push yourself away.

“I can totally afford it, though!” he pouted. After he relaxed his grip around your body, you still found it too tough to escape his weird embrace. That’s your karma for being friends with the guy who goes to the gym in-between classes, you suppose. And after more struggling to set yourself free, you eventually gave up as the sunset reduced to silence.

That was when he squeezed you tight once more for a last makeshift hug, then planted an ambiguously-friendly kiss on your cheek as he said, “Let’s go get dinner now? I’ll drive.”

“Yeah, sure. Can we get chicken nuggets?”

He lifted both of your bodies up to your feet, watching as you collected your things off the seat before he led you by the hand to his car. “Pff, you always want nuggets,” he teased. “But yeah, I’m down—there’s a McDonald’s right next to my work, let’s go there while I try to convince you to apply at my job!”

And now you work at said McDonald’s.

You didn’t tell him, of course. Only that you “finally got a job,” so that he could finally stop trying to get you hired at his stuffy building space.

It was pretty busy in the morning when people in office attire would come in for a quick, cheap coffee. Lunch and dinner time was also busy as expected—it was one of the things that made you happy to be a cashier and not one of the cooks or drive-through people.

And the best part about this was that you never saw the uptight Ms. Recruiter Rosalyne here, nor Ajax himself. You knew for a fact that Ajax only went to McDonald’s when it was with you, as he preferred other fast foods, so even if his work was just right there, you really didn’t have to worry about accidentally seeing him. If you did… Well, that would probably be really embarrassing, wouldn’t it?

It was one o’clock in the afternoon, lunch rush.

People were rude, your coworkers were irritable, customers were in a rush—horrible, really, but also a normal day for you. Just smile and put on that customer service voice and it will soon be over. Plus, you got free chicken nuggets for your own lunch break before this.

It was not until you felt your phone vibrate in the pocket of your jeans. Well. It was not that common to get a text like that. Your family should know you’re at work; your friends, too. Just one peak—only one, just while the customer in front of you is still holding up the line while he decides what to order. Propping your phone up behind the register, you open it to check your lockscreen.

orange fuckwad: heyyy you want some mcds nuggets?!?!? ;)

Holy shit. Absolutely not.

“Can I order the uhhh…” Oh good lord you have to turn off your phone now. “Can I order the uhhh McLobster?”

“Sorry sir, the McLobster was discontinued five years ago.” You were about to blow your brains out.

“No I swear I just ordered it last week?”

Your eyes kept shifting to the door. And there, finally, in all his glory making your heart absolutely drop in fear, was Ajax coming through the door. And for you, too—to buy you a box of chicken nuggets. In any other case, you’d find it endearing ( and it still was! ) but in this instance you really wanted to die right now.

The customer suddenly raised an eyebrow at you when you shifted your body to the side, trying to use his body as a shield from the eyes of your friend. There was a second cashier next to you—hopefully Ajax will line up on their line instead of yours. And hopefully, you could use this crusty McDonald’s hat to hide your face.

“Hey!” your coworker suddenly called out to you. You looked towards their empty cashier line with a glimmer of hope for good news. “I’m going on my lunch!” Your face dropped. “I’ll see you in 30, yeah?”

No! Not yeah! But you couldn’t do anything but plead with your facial expression as they left to the backroom, leaving Ajax with no choice but to join your line. If you could blow up this whole building right now, God, you would.

Five customers until him, four customers until him, three, two, one—

“Woah!” The surprise on his face felt insulting. Actually, you still used the hat to hide your face as best as you could. It was failing at hiding your identity from him as expected, but at least it helped you obscure the view of his… physique. Him, with his… um, his black slacks and white collared shirt that was just a little too tight on him, and his grey blazer that was thrown over his shoulder. One button at the top unfastened, almost as if he loosened it just to breathe during his lunch break.

And his hair, if you didn’t want to meet his eyes then you were honestly staring there. Whose hair was usually messy and tousled, now slicked perfectly for once with gel, all in a proper yet still very Ajax-way. The sides were in place, meanwhile strands over his eyes and at the top of his hair remained loose in that messy way that still characterized him. God, you might just die from embarrassment and awkwardness right now.

“This is where you work?” he asked, incredulously.

“Good afternoon, sir. What can I get for you today?” you smiled. Please, please just go with it.

He looked surprised at your voice, especially since it was so fabricated and one he had not heard before. You just hoped he wouldn’t be a dumb prick to you today, just this once. “Oh, um…” Please, please. “One ten-piece chicken nugget, please.” Thank God.

“Would you like a drink with that?”

“Yes, one large soda, if that’s okay?”

“Will that be all?”

“Uh.” He looked confused. You just stared at him. “Yeah… Yeah, I think so.”

Then he swiped his card, you directed him to the side, and he left the line. With a lingering gaze, of course. He looked like a lost ( and maybe even a little hurt ) puppy after his order, and as much as this made you feel sad for him, you were just glad to get through with him as a customer without any complications. He’ll definitely be bothering you after this, anyways.

He pretty much watched you the entire time he waited for his food, eyeing you with a look of concern that did not belong on his usual expression. But you ignored him for your own betterment—you’d really just rather get through this rush hour of customers. And when his order number was finally called, he held the small bag with nuggets and his large soda with confusion. Oh, right. That food was probably bought for you.

You sent him a look and a head tilt that notioned ‘Just eat it’, and surprisingly, he got it. Ajax, with his pristine proper suit and blazer over his shoulder, sat down at a dirty barstool and ate his ten-piece chicken nuggets. He was still watching you, though; he glanced at you every few seconds while he was chewing. Minutes that felt so long passed, and you just hoped his lunch break would end soon so he could get back to his building.

“Hello again!” You almost jumped in place when you found him in front of you again, having finished his nuggets.

“Ajax,” you grumbled, trying to speak quietly. There was another customer coming to line up behind him. “I can’t talk during my shift.”

“Oh!” He looked at you in innocent surprise for a second, definitely not as depressed as earlier. “No, I was just gonna order.”

You wanted to die. “Didn’t you already…” Clearing your throat, you remembered there was another customer lined up behind him. Thank heavens the lunch rush was over already. Time to put on the customer service voice for him again. “What can I get for you?”

“A box of ten-piece chicken nuggets, please!” he smiled. “And a large soda!”

If you didn’t feel like killing him before, well you certainly did now. And guess what, he ate this order, too! Was he doing this out of spite now? Ordering nuggets and then eating them right in front of you? Because honestly, it was making you less hungry and more confused, if anything. This was definitely not what you expected—but then again, you fully anticipated he’d hold up the line just to talk to you. But no, suddenly he was a McDonald’s nugget fan?

The moment you get out of here, you’re going to twist his ear. Time passes again where you purposely avoid his gaze. So, so much time. Either his lunch break was just incredibly long, or time was just going so slow because he was here. You bet it was the latter.

And then, once again, you find him at the front of your line.

“Hello!” he smiled. He looks happy just to see you. “Can I get a ten-piece box of chicken nuggets?”

“And a large soda with that?” you asked, almost with a sigh.

He looks uneasy, standing to the tips of his toes for a moment. “No,” he drags out with hesitance. “Side of large fries, actually.”

Ooo, how different! It’s the most entertainment you could wish for in a day. And when you shoo him to the side this time, he has the biggest smile on his face. How unusual—in this situation, at least. Then when his order comes, he actually turns to leave this time. He walked to the glass doors with an innocent grin and a large McDonald’s bag in his hand, happily waving to you goodbye. Finally.

“You never told me you work at the McDonald’s right by me!”

He was there waiting for you when you walked out of your shift, packed up, ready to go home, and definitely smelling like grease. “Well aren’t you out early…” you sighed at him. “It’s only three in the afternoon.”

“I asked if I could leave so I could come see you sooner,” he frowned. Endearing, once again. And your heart may have skipped just a bit when he lifted up the last brown bag he bought. “I saved these for you. They’re not warm anymore but there’s fries, a soda, and fifteen nuggets… I, uh, couldn’t finish the second order.”

You nearly laughed out. “Why in the world did you order so much anyways?”

“So I could see you again,” he pouted.

He was still wearing his office attire, top button unfastened once again and blazer under his arm once you took the fast food bad again. You might’ve just had nuggets during your lunch break, and this food may be cold and soggy by now, but the thought of him buying it for you made it the best meal in the world. And, it was also the fact he left his own shift early just to see you. He could be nice at times; so nice, it almost comforted the fact he made you want to die earlier.

“You embarrassed me,” you tiredly sighed. The both of you were walking together to his car—how he knew you were dropped off here was beyond you.

“Sorry!” he sheepishly smiled. “I really didn’t think I’d see you there…” Which was understandable, sure, but did he really have to order that many McNuggets just to see you at the cashier stand? “But now that I know you work right next to me…”

“Ajax, no.”

“Oh come on!” He pouted with a considerably loud whine while the both of you crossed the street to his building. You figured he was likely parked behind it, wherever the employee parking was. It still felt a little weird to be in your McDonald’s uniform walking next to a big business building. “I get to see you every lunch break—doesn’t that sound so fun?”

“No not really.”

He groaned even louder again, slumping his shoulders as if he was not dressed like he was going to an office party right now. But then, in some sort of comforting silence, he aligned his arm over your shoulders. It was cute, honestly—how he would still do this despite the fact you smelled like pure grease right now ( and the fact you were trying to ignore the feeling of his arm muscles that were practically bursting through his sleeves ).

He eyed you a few times during this silent walk, watching as you stuffed your face with nuggets and fries. Holy God this tasted so good for some reason…?! You totally deserved this after your shift of rude customers and embarrassing moments—then your good friend Ajax brings you nuggets and fries right after. How romantic.

And speaking of your ‘friend’, he pulled you closer against him, arm practically swallowing your entire being over your shoulders. Not that you were complaining, though; you found his weird obsession with being near you all the time just a little bit cute. And besides, he drove you places, and he bought you chicken nuggets.

Who could not love a man that buys you chicken nuggets?

[serene-sun]

𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝕸𝖎𝖓𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖗𝖞 𝕺𝖓 𝕿𝖍𝖊 𝕸𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖙𝖆𝖎𝖓, 𝕻𝖆𝖘𝖙 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝕽𝖎𝖉𝖌𝖊 𝖁𝖎𝖑𝖑𝖆𝖌𝖊

Summary: After a multitude of wrong doings at your catholic church, you and four other nuns are sent on a mysterious transfer to a ministry nobody dares speak of. On behalf of the Count Copia, you are welcomed after a suspenseful journey. Author Note: This is the first chapter to my new series based on some of my favorite movies like Dracula, The Phantom Of The Opera and Labyrinth. You might even get some references to some others as well as a few ghost lyrics. This is going to be a build up to smut, and this will be a romance one obviously but beware this is major corruption kink coming your way. If you need some help, the ghoul in this chapter is Aether, and half of this is quite literally the exact script of Dracula. You can even look it up and see! Please enjoy, all feedback in my inbox is greatly appreciated.

Chapter one of my new series, “𝕽𝖔𝖘𝖊 𝕲𝖆𝖗𝖉𝖊𝖓 𝕱𝖚𝖓𝖊𝖗𝖆𝖑 𝕺𝖋 𝕾𝖔𝖗𝖊𝖘”

In a Coach in the Carpathian Mountains, a young woman reads to four passengers from a travel brochure.

“Among the rugged peaks that frown down on the Borgo Pass are found crumbling castles of a bygone age.” The woman is knocked from her seat by a bump in the dirt rural road.

“I say, driver, a bit slower!” Another woman says, her black veil crooked as she shakes in the mobile. 

“No, no! We must reach the mountain before sundown!” The driver says, a crack in his voice as the silent erie sound of the forest starts to swallow all sounds.

‘And why, pray?” One of the female passengers asks, closing the bible in her lap.

“When the sun sets the demons start evoking the mountain side like raging wolves and hyenas, desperate for any vulnerable being to feast upon!” The driver replies as they are enveloped in a cloud of fog, the steep road getting more bumpy.

You held tight onto the rosary in your hands, a charm of Jesus Christ on the cross between your palms as you listen to the man speak.

As the vehicle stops in the center of the small village on the ridge, the passengers eagerly step out of the transport and into the rich moist soil. This is a small village of three homes and one or two inns, mainly farmland and water sources as it fits in a small acre. 

A woman from the nearest inn steps out of the entrance as chickens follow, her hair is in a messy bun and there is soot smudged across her face and clothes with a few patches holes in her dress and apron.

“Oh dear, let me help with your luggage sisters.” She says, wiping her hands on her sides to rid of the grim.

“Oh do not worry madam, we are to arrive up top the mountain by tonight.” you say as she grabs a leathery bag.

“Tonight? But the sun is already half set? The gate keeper, he is afraid. Good fellow, he is. Wants me to ask if you can wait to go on after sunrise.” She says as she sets the luggage back into the trunk.

“Im dearly sorry but im afraid we have specific orders from our adviser to be there by sundown, and I fear we are already late.” You reply, hands still clasped together.

Was what the driver said true? Why would it? Perhaps he was only trying to scare the group of young women.

“And who needs you on the mountain? Who sent you faithful young holy women to the dark abbey?” The innkeeper says in disbelief, she studies the very christian and catholic constant theme on the luggage and clothes.

“Count Copia, I assure you, we are here on holy deeds.” You say, willingly ignoring the description of the abbey, surely it was not truly an unholy place, it was an abbey after all.

‘Count Copia? And to the ministry?” She hides her hands in her apron pockets with her brows knitting.

“Yes.” You nod slowly, unsure of what she means, is he not the holy man they were sent to serve? 

“No, you mustn't go there. We people of the mountains believe at the castle there are devils. Count and his ghouls!  They take the form of wolves and bats, goats and succubi. They leave their coffins at night, and they feed on the blood of the living.” She says, placing her hands on your shoulders and eagerly rushing you inside, “Look at the sun! Its already gone, come we must go indoors.”

“But thats all superstition. Why I…I cant understand why…” You try to reason as the door is slammed shut after the other nuns enter.

“But wait, I mean, just a minute. What im trying to say is that im not afraid. I've explained to the driver that its a matter of holiness and god filled right, We've explained it and we must arrive soon.” You say as she pokes at the fire, letting out a cough into her hand.

“If you must go then take this for your mothers sake,” the innkeeper hands you a small vile of blood, “This will protect you..”

‘W-what is it?” You ask, the other sisters surrounding you in curiosity.

“The blood of christ!” She says, eyes wide with fear.

For a moment you feel the need to call help for the woman, she must be a poor paranoid soul. And there is no way she of all people would have the blood of christ.

The sisters gather back into the small mobile and quickly ride upon the foggy dark mountain as the red piercing sun drowns in the horizon. 

When the car stops in the pitch black court yard, the car hurriedly drives away.

“Wait! Driver! Our luggage!” 

The groups attention is brought back to the stone path to the large entrance doors as it is lined with lit candles that come of flame. The dancing red light illuminates them to follow, you take the lead, as you seem to be the least terrified. 

You push open the large black doors and step into the Obsidian floor of the main castle. Its dark just like outside and candles suddenly egnite.

The nuns look around the room, taking in the shadowed paintings, murals, and stained glass.

A footstep spooks you as the sound comes from a taller man at the top of the main stair case.

“G-Good evening.” You bow your head slightly in respect as you can only make out his shape.

“I am…Count Copia..” He says, thick italian accent in his voice as he begins stepping down the long stairs.

“Its very good to see you. I don't know what happened to the driver and our luggage and…well…with all this..I thought I was in the wrong place.” You say, hoping to not sound rude, but there wasn't a cross in sight and the stained glass showed depictions of devilish things instead of virgin mary and jesus.

“I bid you welcome.” The count says,

Outside the large windows, there the howl of a wolf.

“Listen to them…children of the night. What music they make!” He smiles hauntingly.

The older man starts walking off down a corridor lined with paintings and candles. The hall is painted dark red with black trim. One candle stick is consumed with spider webs, it catches your attention as you follow.

“A spider spinning his web for the unwary fly. The blood…is the life, Ms…” He invited you to say your name.

“Ah of course, My name is Sister _, from the western Catholic church of god.” You say with another pleasing bow.

The man hums, his eyes darkening, “Im sure you will find this part of the ministry more inviting.” He says as he opens the doors to a larger room, it has five beds, dressers, nightstands and even an chest at the foot of every bed. Theres two couches on either side of a coffee table in the center of the room, accompanied with a vase of dead roses, a fire place, and two other chairs of black leather. What is most questionable is why the room is a circle, not one corner.

‘Oh rather! Its quite different from outside. Oh, and the fire! Its so cheerful.” You say with a smile.

“I took the liberty of having your luggage brought up. Allow me.” He says as he takes the groups wool capes, he hangs them on a coat rack.

‘Oh yes, thank you.” One of the sisters says as she sits on the neatly made bed. 

The room is painted a deep purple, black trims and wall designs. The curtains over the large windows were a pitch black, and the beds were of black steel and neatly covered with purple silk sheets and purple cotton. The room was lit with candles and a chandelier.

You pick up the letter on the bed, but you accidentally cut your finger on the sharp note card.

As a droplet of blood rolls down your finger, the man quickly turns away.

“Oh dear im sorry, its just a paper cut, I didn't know you were squeamish.” You apologize as you grab a napkin cloth and hold it.

“The infirmary is on the main hall to the left, I hope you shall never need it.” He says as he holds his hands behind his back.

“Thank you,” You smile.

‘I will have a ghoul take you there, and get a bandage.” He says with a large swallow. 

You tilt your head, “ghoul?” You ask, what is with this odd abbey?

Suddenly, out of the darkness of the room, a masked entity approaches you. His silvery devil mask shines in the candle light, through the slit shines his piercing white eyes, pupils so thin and slit like a snake your unsure if they're even there or if its the shadows playing tricks on you. Hes in a nice suit attire, a skull tie and button up pants. His dark hair is slightly wavy and is cut short at his ear and neck, he has a calming presence and you notice his ears are long and pointed. You take in the fact that this man was not infant human, but rather a demon. 

So the innkeeper was correct? About unholy ghosts here?

He leads you to the infirmary, the walk there is silent as you continue to study his form. He has a spaded tail, and his hands are a pale muted purple and his veins are visible in a lighter white color. The ghoul had long sharp claws too, as well as a thicker build. 

He opened the door to the infirmary, he lets you sit down as he gathers materials to address the minor cut.

As he comes back, he kneels in front of you and takes your hand. The pads of his fingers are rough but smooth, hes very gentle and has a calming affect to him.

You swallow, your afraid to speak.

The ghoul parts his lips, like hes about to speak but doesnt know what to say, “Your heart is racing.” he says, deep voice like a deep cave filled with echos and shadows. Its warm and heart filled, he truly means no harm.

Your hands tremble as you shiver, “w-what?”

‘Ah uh…sorry…I meant that your frightened and there is no need too be.” He quickly blurts out, like he hasn't talked to a stranger in years.,

“This is not what i was expecting..” You say as you start to ease up.

“Nobody does, don't worry, you are safe.” He says as he cleans the wound. 

“This…is not a place of god is it..?” You finally ask as he lets go to cut a piece of gauze to use.

“No. It is not.” He looks into your eyes.

You had the feeling that when your church said they were moving you, that it wasn't because you were the best sister of god there. You had started asking to many questions and you always knew that when they transferred people it was never for the better but to rather rid of the so called delinquents that questioned god. In a way you knew you would be thrown out, but not like this and to the wolves.

“Im sorry…I just…I don't want to die..” you start to tear up, ‘I don't want to burn for eternity.”

The ghoul quickly looks up at you, ‘no no no don't worry,” He chuckles, “Your not going to die here and you wont burn for eternity, I doubt god even knows you exist.” 

Your taken aback some, “But don't you eat people? Kill us for blood? Sacrifices and such?” 

“Your demonology books are far outdated…” He says as he wraps your finger.

“So….you ghouls are…kind?” You say, standing up.

He nods, “yes, everyone here is.”

You look down at your feet, “I apologize, I feel I need to introduce myself and start over.” 

The ghoul stretches his hand out, “You may call me Nameless Ghoul.”

You take his hand, “Im Sister _, I hope we can be friends.”

[11queensupreme11]

imagine this scenario in baby Percy au:

Poseidon is still getting used to taking care of baby Percy, everything is still strange and new to him

for some reason he is baby percy they are invited to a get-together or a meeting of gods in the underworld, everything goes well until it is time to leave

Poseidon is still getting used to being a father, he literally spent billions of years without worrying about a life completely dependent on him so understandably he forgets that he was with baby Percy and leaves without her (in fact this is quite normal behavior among first-time parents)

he usually went straight home without even remembering that he was a father, he did his chores normally and only realized that he wasn't with his baby when feeding or bedtime arrived

For ONE minute everything would be completely silent for him and then the next moment would come TOTAL despair

Meanwhile baby Percy crawls across the floor without anyone noticing the gods are huge, why would someone six feet tall or taller walk around looking down? and she miraculously doesn't get stepped on by anyone

and then she meets the BEAST... the great CERBERUS

the percy alert is triggered and all the gods are running around like headless chickens looking for baby percy as if their lives depended on it and maybe they do, they get together and think about where was the last place baby percy was seen

and then they remember that it was in the underworld and the next moment several gods are running to the underworld as if they were running away from death from kratos, do you understand the reference?

they are turning everything over, there is not an untouched stone or room in the castle that hasn't been turned over, everything is in chaos until they noticed the strange behavior of the cerberus

Cerberus is lying face up, he doesn't move, he moves as little as possible despite the apparently uncomfortable position, his breathing is light and contained and shallow but despite this his tail is wagging

looking closer they realize why: baby percy is lying on top of Cerberus's chest, she is sleeping comfortably while holding a handful of fur in her little hand

the reason Cerberus is controlling her breathing is because he is trying to prevent the force of his breathing from throwing the baby out of his chest, he has been in an uncomfortable position for hours because he didn't want to risk knocking over or waking the little one but adorable recognition flea that clung to his fur while he took a brief nap

It's a lovely sight and many gods took photos to later pay a painter to paint the image on a painting, relief reigns in the place

except for Poseidon who received the BIGGEST SCORE from his mother and from his older brother, you can bet that during the whole scolding Adamas and Zeus were laughing and recording the whole situation with a state-of-the-art camera, Poseidon left his mother's house with several bumps on his head (like those bumps that appear on the heads of characters in anime after they get hit)

ADGFAGFVSDUFVY WHY DID I JUST IMAGINE POSEIDON AS THE MOM FROM HOME ALONE 😭😭😭😭

i love the thought poseidon just being perfectly calm, until it registers in his head that his baby is missing and he just blue-screens for a minute until:

but broooooooo poseidon would be IN SO MUCH FUCKING TROUBLE

he didn't just leave her in valhalla or midgard, he left her in fucking HELHEIM!!! that's the most dangerous of the three realms, his ass is LUCKY she didn't crawl out of hades palace!!!

granny rhea absolutely needs to banish him to the time-out island for that!!! 😤

[slipping-through-my-fingertips]

"A Bump"

Summary: She holds her tee shirt tightly over her stomach where a perfect little bump is forming. Annabeth quickly snaps the photo grinning like she’s just been given a first place prize before yelling for Percy.

A/n: enjoy the ttpd references

Ao3

Part 1 Part 2

Percy insists on taking weekly photos of Annabeth. Full body pictures of her: standing in the kitchen cooking bacon, walking in the front door after work kicking off her heels, or standing in the light of their bathroom before bed. They aren’t particularly good photos. Not in the way he wants them to be. 

They’re mostly blurry because Annabeth is talking with her arms or walking out of frame. Percy never tells her he’s taking them. According to him, he was “trying to get candid images.” 

So, Annabeth documents her pregnancy for him. She takes selfies in their floor length mirror. The same pose each day. Tracking her belly’s progress. 

She doesn’t tell Percy about them. Annabeth keeps the photos in a separate album on her phone with a plan to get them all printed out on glossy paper and put them into a scrapbook. 

There’s no real physical progress in her first trimester. Beyond the morning sickness that lasts well into the night. Annabeth is sick at all times of day. She keeps crackers and breath mints in her purse now. 

Percy often rubs her back as she heaves into the toilet. 

“I wish I could do something.”

She grabs his hand from behind her. “This is something.” 

It’s a nice moment ruined instantly by more vomit. 

Annabeth takes the morning off on a random Tuesday or so her coworkers believe. They have a baby appointment (as Percy has taken to calling them). It’s that morning when Annabeth is taking her daily photo she feels the bump. 

It’s like it grew overnight. She holds her tee shirt tightly over her stomach where a perfect little bump is forming. Annabeth quickly snaps the photo grinning like she’s just been given a first place prize before yelling for Percy. 

“What? Are you hurt? Is baby okay?” 

He’s holding her stomach. When Percy meets her eyes, Annabeth is trying not to tear up, and says, “a bump.”

Their appointment goes smoothly; they get lunch afterwards at this sandwich shop nearby. 

“We should come here again,” Percy says, mid-chew. 

“Close your mouth.” 

He grins at Annabeth. The same trouble maker smirk she’s grown to love. 

“But, I agree,” she tells him, “we should make our way through the menu. The buffalo chicken sandwich sounds really good.” 

“Not gonna be too spicy for you, Chase?” 

Annabeth rolls her eyes. 

“Says the man who won’t touch wasabi with a ten foot pole.”

He glares at her like he wants to hit her. 

“Can’t hit me, I’m pregnant.” 

“Shut up.” 

They’re sitting at a table for four so Percy moves around the table and takes the seat next to Annabeth. He puts his hand on her bare thigh. 

It’s July in New York. She’s wearing Jean shorts and her camp shirt, which thankfully still fits. Annabeth knows with the bump now making itself known she won’t be wearing her beloved orange shirt for much longer. Maybe she can get Chiron to send her a bigger size without raising suspicion. 

Percy squeezes her thigh bringing Annabeth back to the present. He moves his hand upwards, not even bothering to glance around to see if anyone’s watching them. 

No one is. 

Annabeth is hot. She tells herself it’s because the AC in the shop isn’t doing its job. 

Her shorts are baggy enough so that Percy can reach in and rub his fingertips along her underwear. 

“Percy…”

“Keep eating,” he says. 

She takes another bite. 

“Annabeth?” 

Percy removes his hand and lets it sit on her expose thigh again. 

“Hey Aimee!” 

They had graduated together.

Annabeth remembers sitting next to her in their chemistry classes, both of them groaning over how boring their Professor had been. Aimee and her studied for every exam together and always paired up for labs. Together them both managed an A minus in the course. 

“So this must be Percy,” Aimee says, “shame we never met before Annie and I graduated.” 

“It’s nice to finally meet you, Annabeth told me how great of a chem partner you were.”

“If I were half as good as her, we would’ve gotten A pluses.” 

“Don’t sell yourself short,” Annabeth tells her. 

“We should catch up sometime,” Aimee replies, “get lunch or a drink. You still have my number?”

“Yeah, I’d love to.” 

“And Percy, you’re welcome to join us unless Annabeth needs an excuse to get away.” The girls chuckle but Percy still smiles fondly at Annabeth. 

“She might want to get away from me,” Percy says. 

“Anyway, I’ll let you get back to it. It was great to see you, Annie.” 

“You too, Aimee. I will text you.” 

“Great!” She starts to walk away but turns at the last second, “by the way, you’re glowing Annie, whatever you’re doing keep it up.” 

Annabeth blushes. She’s not about to tell Aimee the real reason she’s “glowing.” 

“Thank you, Aimee.” 

Percy moves back around to his side of the table. 

“See the bump, it’s making you glow.” 

“Is that why you can’t take your hands off me?” She asks. 

“The bump is sexy, sue me.” 

Annabeth rolls her eyes, watching Percy take his next bite. Gods, she was so down bad for this man it’s ridiculous. 

“Don’t you think it’s crazy that I’m having your baby?”

Percy swallows. “No? I always thought we’d end up here.” 

“Pregnant at 25?” 

“Okay maybe not exactly this scenario—“ he grabs her hand from across the table. Adjusts her engagement ring as Percy tends to do, “—I love this scenario for the record.” 

Annabeth smiles. “I know, me too.”

“I just always saw us…”  

“Together,” she says. 

Because she always did too. 

[lostfirefly]

Well, I don't know why I came here tonight, I've got the feeling that something ain't right

Hey, hey, hey!! I haven't published anything for a long time. The stress of studying took all my energy. Welcome to another fun day for Catherine and Buggy! English is not my native language, errors may occur. As always, feel free to share your thoughts :)

Masterlist is here

Description: Neighbor asks Catherine and Buggy to look after the kids at their birthday party while she goes to get the cake.

Warnings: Fun, fluff, jokes. A composite image of the kids at the party. Sorry in advance for the fact that children swear, but I just thought that they often repeat everything after adults. Small references to my followers.

Words: 5344

Buggy x OC from my “You’ve Got the Same Dream as Me” series.

Taglist: @gingernut1314, @operationroots, @hey-august, @yujo-nishimura, @emmiebugz-blog, @mydearlybeloathed

The title is taken from "Stuck in the middle with you" by Stealers Wheel.

✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

“How long are we going to sit like this, cotton candy?” Buggy stroked Catherine's back as she curled up in his lap. 

“It's only been fifteen minutes, stop nagging.” She took his ponytail and began to wind it around her finger. “You stayed late at the circus two nights in a row. I missed you. And now I want to spend some time with you in our chair.” 

“It’s nonsense, Cathie-pie. We're doing nothing.”

“We’re enjoying each other's company. It's so great and romantic. We're resting, you're hugging me, I feel like I'm in the safest place in the world right now.” Catherine curled up even tighter and pulled the blanket over them. “Let's sit for a little while longer, please.”

Buggy rolled his eyes. “Fine. An hour, ok?” He hugged her tighter, kissed her forehead and quickly wiped the lipstick mark with his fingers. “Why do I always give in to you?” He noticed Catherine start laughing. “What's so funny, little shit?” 

“Your nose. It's so funny, it bumps into my head, then my cheeks.” Catherine saw how sad Buggy became. “Oh, don't be upset, my silly clown. I love your nose. It also whistles funny sometimes at night. But I like it, it makes me feel like I'm home.” 

“You like mocking me, right?”

“I'm not mocking you! Remember when I went to visit my sister recently? I missed your snoring and whistling, so I had to put a chicken whistle by my pillow and I hugged the teddy bear. It all reminded me of you and our home, my little bear.” Catherine exhaled and started running her fingers around Buggy's arm. “I want you to come to my parents’ house so much. I want to show you everything. My room, photo albums, my favorite places. I was sitting in a coffee shop and thinking how great it would be to sit here with you. Maybe you'll come to Loguetown with me sometime?”

“I don't know, Catherine. We’ll see, ok? Fuck, totally forgot I have something for you.” Buggy sent his hand to the night stand and pulled some box of candies out of the drawer for her. “Here, your favorite nougat ones.”

“Yesterday, you stole blue irises for me. Today you brought me sweets. You're so cute, my Buggy Bear. You bring me candies, flowers, you even started bringing me candles. Thanks!” She kissed him on the cheek and took a couple of candies. “Yummy. Oh! Can I ask you a question?”

“First, Cathie-pie, it's still a terrible nickname. Second, you talked me into staying in this chair and covered me with a blanket with little ponies on it. Me.” Buggy pointed his finger at himself. “A grown man. Do I have a choice to say no?” 

“Asshole.” Catherine popped a candy into her mouth. “You know, we've been together for six months now, and I realized I don't know your middle name. Do you have a middle name? Let's say Buggy Eiichiro the Clown.” 

“Oh, I know what name I could have.” He grinned. “Buggy “The Best Sex of Catherine Mitchell's Life” the Clown.” He started giggling and winked at her. 

“I hate you. Why can't you answer like a normal person?” Catherine gently slapped him on the shoulder. “Now you're punished and I’ll ask another question. Have you ever dreamed of anything? Or maybe you have another dream now.”

“Why are you asking?”

“Everyone has dreams, Buggy.” Catherine ran her finger over his chest. “You talk not so much about your past, I'm wondering what you were like before you met me. So far I only know that you were in prison, hanging out with some kid and are worth a lot of money. But I still think you should cost more.”

“I didn't hang out with the kid! Well... I used to dream of you leaving my life, but as we can see,” Buggy smacked Catherine on the head, “that wasn't meant to happen, and now you piss me off every single day.” 

“I'm serious, clown. I told you about mine yesterday.”

“You mean that dream where you wanted to be queen of the gummy worms?” Buggy laughed. “I can't stop imagining this picture. I'm sorry, baby, it doesn't count.”

“I was five years old, you idiot. What could I have dreamed of when I was five? Okay, if you don't want to tell me, don't tell me.” Catherine gently slapped her palms on his chest.

“Fine. Seriously though. Well,” Buggy scratched his head, “I dreamed of being the king of… all circuses. But I had to give up on that dream. I had and have no right to dream about that.”

“Are you sure you're talking about the circus? You have the right to dream, my blue-haired love.” Catherine looked at Buggy, saw that he didn't want to continue this topic, took his hand and started to run her fingers over his palm. “I don't know. It seems to me that you are already the king. Tickets are selling out fast. Your fangirls are sighing for you.”

“I don't have fangirls! Stop mocking me, little shit!” 

“No, you have! I saw them. But I won't give you to them.” Catherine poked Buggy in the shoulder. “And I’m so proud of you. Can't wait to see the new show.” She exhaled and gently took the strand of his hair. “We're sitting so well, huh? Thank you for this, I know you don’t like, but I appreciate you suffering for me.” Catherine raised her head. “I love you so, so much, my Buggy Bear.” She gently pulled him by the ponytail closer and touched her lips to his. 

(doorbell rings) 

“Who is it? Are you waiting for someone?” Catherine raised an eyebrow. 

“No. Fuck them! Let's not open the door.” Buggy tried to kiss her back.

(knock on the door) 

“Wait!” Catherine gently pushed his head back. “Maybe it's Cabaji? He wanted to come in and ask about how to spend a perfect date with a girl.”

“Why can't he ask over the phone?” Buggy tried to kiss her neck. “Fuck him too.” 

“Stop! He wanted to write everything down.” Catherine tried to fight back and slapped him on the back. “I want to help him. He's your friend.” 

“He’ll do it later. We’re enjoying each other and to be honest, now I like sitting in the fucking chair.” Buggy tried to kiss her neck again. 

“Oh, for Christ's sake, Buggy!” Catherine had a hard time pulling his head off. “Don't touch me with your painted lips. You already pestered me in the bathroom this morning and I said no. What's gotten into you?”

“You were so sexy in the bathroom in your pants with pandas, I couldn't resist.” Buggy took her hand and kissed it. 

“I wasn't sexy, I was disheveled and was brushing my teeth.” Catherine grabbed his chin and pecked him on his nose. “Is there something else on your mind, clown?”

“Stop doing this, woman!” Buggy scrunched up his face and tried to move away from Catherine.

“I want and I kiss your nose!” She pecked him on his nose several times. “Love you, my old grumpy boy.” 

“I’m not ol-!” 

(doorbell rings) 

“I'll go open it.” Catherine quickly got up from Buggy's lap, ran to the door, but stopped abruptly at the exit from the bedroom and turned to Buggy. “Oh, no! What if it's not Cabaji. What if it's some man who came to take me away from you.” Catherine winked and quickly ran out into the hallway. 

“Hey!” Buggy rushed after her and caught up only at the front door. 

Catherine laughed when he grabbed her hand and began to pull her towards him. “You're such a fool. Look at how you're clinging to me. My blue-haired protector.” She kissed him on the cheek and opened the door. “Mrs. Emmie? What happened?”

A short, middle-aged woman with dark hair stood on the threshold. “Hello, Mr. The Clown.” She waved her hand. 

“Buggy, actually.” He rolled his eyes. 

Mrs. Emmie blushed a little. “Sorry. Mister Buggy, Miss Catherine, I need your help. My grandson is here for his birthday party, his parents haven't arrived yet and I have to pick up his cake. Could you look after him and some of his friends while I go get the cake?”

“NO!” Buggy shouted loudly, not expecting such an intonation from himself.

“Please, Mr. The Clown!”

“It's Buggy, for god's sake!! I've been living here for two years!!”

“Sorry, Mr. The Clown! Well, I went around to all the neighbors. No one is here. Grandson's parents were stuck in traffic and would be here in about two hours. The kids' parents would be arriving, but they would also be arriving in about an hour. The table was already set, with cocktails for the kids and a bar for the adults. Please! I can pay!” Mrs. Emmie looked at Catherine with tear-stained eyes. 

“How much?” Buggy crossed his arms. 

“Excuse us for a second, Mrs. Emmie.” Catherine took his hand and led him aside. “Are you crazy asking about money, clown? She's asking for help!”

“Not help, cotton candy!” Buggy glanced at Mrs. Emmie. “She's asking to babysit. I'm not going to babysit for free.”

“Perfect!” Catherine fluttered her hands. “And if I asked you to babysit our child, would you ask me for money too?”

“Oh, no, in that case I'd charge you a different fee.” Buggy giggled idiotically. 

“You're disgusting, you know that?” Catherine gently stroked his shoulder. “I know, you don't like kids. I'm not a fan of them either. But do you really want to leave me to be eaten by a bunch of children? I will never believe in my life that you would do this. You didn't leave me in that god’s cage.” Catherine hugged him around his waist, placing her chin on his chest. “Will my Buggy the Brave Knight save me again? And don't forget there's free food and free booze there. Then we'll come home, and I promise I won't even drag you out for a walk today. We'll stay home and eat chips and hot dogs like old people.”

“Fine.” Buggy groaned. 

“You're my best!” Catherine kissed him on his cheek. “Love, love, love you!” She turned back to Mrs. Emmie, who looked at Catherine with hope in her eyes. “It's okay, we agree.”

“Thank you! Thank you!” Mrs. Emmie hugged Catherine. “You know, Mr. The Clown, even though you grumble all the time, you've become a little bit nicer since that sweet sweetie came into your house.”

“See? I’m sweet.” Catherine playfully poked Buggy in his chest. “And you're nice.” 

Buggy rolled his eyes and growled, pushing Catherine towards the exit. “This means I'm changing, and you've come to love me differently.”

Mrs. Emmie led them into the back yard, explaining the rules and restrictions. Catherine memorized them attentively, jabbing Buggy with her elbow whenever he started to grumble. They walked out into the backyard, which was covered with colorful balloons and streamers that said Happy Birthday. Large tables were filled with baked goods, sandwiches, and sweets. The yard echoed with the sounds of children's laughter and whistles.

“Oh, that table over there is definitely for me!” Buggy nodded towards a closed bar with a bunch of drinks and started to walk towards it, but Catherine grabbed him by the pants as soon as he took two steps away from her. “Baby, if you want something from me, just ask.” He chuckled.

Mrs. Emmie and Catherine looked at him at the same time, puzzled. Buggy tensed slightly, looking at Catherine's “i’ll kill you” face. 

Mrs. Emmie exhaled and shook her head. “Miles, honey!” She called out as they descended a couple of steps of the large wooden staircase below. “I’m going to get your cake. Miss Catherine and Mister Buggy are going to sit with you while I go away for a while. I’ll be back in an hour. Bye.” She grabbed the keys and quickly ran out of the house. 

Catherine took Buggy's hand and led him towards the children. “Hey, guys!” She waved to them as she walked out into the backyard.

“WOOOAAAH!!!” A small, chubby boy with big cheeks, ginger hair and big dark eyes turned to face them. “Look! Guys!!” Miles poked his friends in the shoulder. “This's a real clown!!! Strange.. he's not wearing a costume, he's wearing jeans and a sweatshirt. Anyway!! RUN!!!” 

Ten kids jumped up from the grass and ran towards Buggy. 

“Hey, hey!!” Catherine stood in front of Buggy, spreading her arms. “Quiet, guys!” 

“Can you do magic?” One kid was tugging at Buggy's pants.

“Is your nose buzzing?” The other kids tried to get past Catherine.

“Woohooo!!!” One of the children squealed. “Loook, guys!! I’m flying!!” 

Catherine turned around to see Buggy picking the child up by the scruff of the neck and glaring at him. “Buggy! Put the kid down on the ground right now!” She hissed quietly through her teeth.

“He was tugging at my pants!” Buggy turned the child over in his hands. “I don't like it.” 

“I don't care, put him down!”

Buggy rolled his eyes and set the child down. 

“Alright, kiddos, everyone to the table.” Catherine nudged a few kids in the back. “Who wants cake?”

“Who needs cake when there's a clown here!!” Miles squeaked. 

Several children tried to attack Buggy again, but Catherine grabbed him by the shirt. “Na-ah! No attacks on the clown until everyone's had their cake.” She bent down, placing her hands on her knees, and looked at the children. “So. Who wants cake now?” 

“WE WANT CAKE!! WE WANT CAKE!!!” All the children, joyfully throwing up their hands, ran squealing to the table in all directions.

Catherine laughed and followed after them, making sure all the kids were seated. She turned away for just a second to pour everyone some juice when she heard a child squealing and an adult cursing. 

“I can't sit still!!!” Miles' voice came from behind Catherine. “He's so cool!!!” Catherine turned to see several kids attacking Buggy, who tried to fight off a crowd of screaming children and cursing. 

“What the fuck?” Buggy tried to throw the child who had jumped on his back.

“You're sooo funny!! Your nose looks soo real!” The kid started laughing and was about to grab Buggy's nose. 

“Hey, get off him!” Catherine rushed to pull the kids off the suffering clown's body. “You okay?” She quickly examined Buggy's face and hands.

“Fuck, no! Catherine, let's go home. They're crazy!! Let them look after themselves!” Buggy tried to take the squealing kid off yourself. 

“We can't. We promised to help. Look, they like you.” Catherine giggled as she lifted another child off Buggy. “Okay, Miles! Get off my boyfriend's back!” 

“Is he your boyfriend? Wooooaaaah!! You're so lucky!!” Miles looked at Catherine with admiration. “You probably can watch tricks all the time. Is he showing you tricks?”

“Oh, yeah, believe, dude, I show her tricks.” Buggy giggled with a proud expression on his face. “You know, adult ones.” 

“What? What do adult tricks mean?” Miles looked from Catherine to Buggy, waiting for an answer.

Buggy crossed his arms. “That means I can…” 

“Shush!!” Catherine hissed and whispered under her breath. “Shut up and wipe that smug grin off your face,” Catherine took a small step toward Buggy. “Are you crazy, saying that in front of the kid?”

“What's wrong? He's…” Buggy looked at Miles, who was fiddling with his hand. “How old are you, bro?”

“I'm six!” Miles said proudly, with a slight lisp.

“See, Cathie-pie, he's six.” 

“I don’t care. I'm not gonna ruin a little kid's life with your stories.” Catherine nudged Miles toward the table. 

“Look, they are sitting, eating cake and don't bother anyone. Let's go home.” Buggy took Catherine's hand and dragged her to the door. “Nothing will happen to them.”

“I can't leave 10 children unattended, Buggy.” She pulled her hand away and glanced towards the children.

“Come on, cotton candy! Their parents are coming in... How long have we been here?” Buggy looked at his watch. “Ten minutes? Fuck!”

“Stop grumbling, clown! Oh, my God! See? One of the kids is eating dirt!” Catherine waved her hands and ran to another chubby kid with dark hair and big brown eyes. “Hey, you! The boy! Stop doing that!” She barely lifted him off the ground. “What's your name, baby?”

“I'm Howl!” The boy, covered in mud, answered with a proud look.

“And I'm Catherine.” She knelt down and started wiping the kid's hands. “Stop eating dirt, Howl.”

“This will make me cool!” Howl shoveled another handful of dirt down his throat. 

“Cool guys don't eat that. They eat hot dogs. Do you want to be a cool boy and eat hot dogs, Howl?” Catherine stroked the boy's hair.

“Nope!” Howl grabbed the dirt in his hand and put it in his mouth.

“Dear lord!!” Catherine rolled her eyes. “Oh! I know! See that man over there?” Catherine nodded gently toward Buggy. “See? He’s strong and cool. And you know why? He likes hot dogs! Now do you want to be cool like him?” She saw Howl glance at the clown, then look at Catherine and nod. “Do you want me to get you a hot dog?”

Howl scowled. “Now I want to believe you. And as I started believing you, I want a hot dog!!” He jumped towards the table.

“Thank God!” Catherine stood up from her knees and saw Buggy walking towards her, sipping his beer. “Are you kidding me? While I'm trying to seat the kids, you’re enjoying a beer?” Catherine grabbed her head. “These kids are like ten of you, Buggy. They also sit quietly at first and then bam! They start whining and doing strange things.”

“But see? You're doing great. Maybe I should go home and support you from the couch?” Buggy shrugged and put the empty bottle on the nearest table.

“Oh, go wherever you want, Buggy.” Catherine waved at him. “I was hoping for once in my life you'd help me.”

“Sorry, Cathie-pie. I’d love to make things right but it’s time to exit stage left. Bye!” 

“How-- How can you do this to me?” Catherine's eyes widened and she yelled after Buggy, who was walking away. “What? You didn't leave me in the desert, so now you're taking revenge, huh?” She watched how he waved to her. “Go f-- screw you, clown!!!”

“Excuse me, Miss Catherine!” Someone poked Catherine in the arm with his finger several times. “You're swearing!” Miles’ voice came from behind Catherine. 

“And what?” She narrowed her eyes and looked at him. 

“When my parents argue and use bad words, they put a dollar in the jar.” He pulled out a jar of money and shook it in front of Catherine's face. “Dollar, please.”

“What? I won't pay you!” Catherine squealed, her eyes wide.

“Then I'll tell my parents that you were swearing. Guys! Repeat after me! Screw you! Screw you!!” Miles and Howl began to jump around Catherine excitedly, repeating the phrase after her. Miles stopped and glanced at Catherine. “See, lady? You’ll have problems. Dollar.” 

“Do you think you can scare me, little bastard? I jumped off a cliff and live with the clown!” Catherine shifted her gaze to the table and crossed her arms. “Let's do it like this! You sit down at the table, I'll let you have a baby cocktail and I'll tell you a funny story, what do you think the idea is?”

“I don't want the story! Let's do it this way. I'll keep quiet, and you call the clown. I want the clown! Where'd he go?” Miles started to fume. 

“He better packs his bags right now to flee to another country away from my wrath.” Catherine muttered under her breath. “What should I do with you?” She scratched her head. “Oh! If you guys don't want a story, let's hit the piñata. There's probably candy in there. Do you guys like candy? You're kids! You should love them!” Catherine looked at them pleadingly in her eyes. 

“WE WANT THE CLOWN!!!” All the kids stamped their feet. 

“Mother fuc–!” Catherine suddenly covered her mouth with her hand.

“Dollar, please!” Miles picked up the can again.

“Screw you!” Catherine heard the phone ringing. 

“Guuuuys!” Miles raised his hand. “Go!” He waved his hand, giving the command. “Mother fuc-! Mother fuc-!” The kids started kicking their feet and merrily repeating after Catherine. 

“Screw you all!!” Catherine heard the phone ringing. “Shit! Everybody stay here!” Catherine pulled her cell phone out of her pants pocket. “Mrs. Emmie? What? Are you going to be late? And kids’ parents? Also? Yeah, sure, I'll keep an eye on them. Goodbye.” Catherine put her phone in her pocket. “Yeah, she's got traffic. I bet they're all sitting at the bar drinking aperol right now. Oh my god, the kids!” She watched them all scatter again. “Everybody should freeze now!!!” She barked loudly and abruptly covered her mouth with her hand again. “For god's sake, let's beat the piñata now, eat fries, and then you eat cake, and I'll show you tricks.”

“Hooray!!!!!” All children tore out of their seats and ran toward the big pig-shaped piñata. 

They joyfully started pounding the toy until candy sprinkled out of it.

“MY SWEETS! MY SWEETS!!!!” The kids piled on top of each other and started raking up the candy. 

“Stop!! What's wrong with you? Stop climbing on each other.” Catherine grabbed her head. “This is some kind of madhouse.” She muttered to herself and looked at her watch. “I've made it through almost an hour. There's still an hour left.”

“Miss Catherine, I didn't climb on anyone and behaved well. Can I have cake now?” A thin voice of a girl was heard. “I'm Hilda.” 

“Oh, of course, dear Hilda.” Catherine stroked the girl's head and clapped her hands. “Everyone to the table! Let's have cake and fries!!”

“You promised us magic tricks, Miss Catherine!” Miles mumbled, eating candies and approaching the table. 

“Yes, magic tricks! Let me juggle.” Catherine picked up three tangerines and tried to throw them up in the air to catch them, but they all fell to the ground. “Okay! That was a practice run. Let's try again!” She tossed the tangerines again, but they also fell to the ground.

“You're a bad juggler! Why are you ruining my party?” Miles began to sob. 

“Oh, well, I'm sorry I'm such a fucking clumsy person, okay? I can't juggle!” Catherine angrily threw the balls on the ground.

Miles started whining and all the children began to repeat after him. 

“Oh, stop crying! Bunch of..” Catherine rolled her eyes. “It’s not my fault that your paren-”

“I’ll tell my mom that you spoiled my party, and you swore!” Miles wiped his nose. “I want to see you juggling!! YOU CANNOT JU-UGGLE!!”

“Because she doesn't know how to do it. Right, Miss Catherine?” 

“THE CLOWN!!!” Miles, Howl and other seven kids, except for Hilda, jumped to their feet.

Catherine turned to where the children were pointing and saw Buggy gesturing to them to calm down. Catherine tried to hold back a smile, but she wasn't very good at it. “You're back!”

“Yes, and I hate myself for that.” Buggy shrugged, putting his hands in his pockets.

“I always knew you were a good person.” Catherine started stroking his hand. 

“And for that, I hate you.” He shifted his gaze to the kids. “So. What's going on here?” 

“They're crazy, Buggy. And that kid Miles. He’s a little evil. He tried to swindle money out of me. It feels like the only calm person here is that plump blonde girl named Hilda, and only because she eats all the time.” Catherine buried her head in Buggy's shoulder. “I wanna go home. But we need to entertain them somehow, because they'll continue squealing and destroying everything when they finish the cake, because they saw you. Buggy, please! Help me!” Catherine was practically breaking down into tears.

“How about I show them a couple of chop chop tricks?” Buggy placed his hand on her back. “They're kids, right? They love it when clowns do funny things. And by the way, not only kids love that.” He giggled again in a stupid way. 

“Shut up, you pervert.” Catherine raised her eyes. “And no chop chop in front of these kids, please. I don't know who they are, or who their parents are. What if they come after you later? I don't want you to get hurt.” 

Buggy snapped his fingers. “Are there any ribbons or scarves around here?”

“I saw some. Wait.” Catherine quickly ran to the table and came running back. “Here.” She held out several colorful chiffon scarves to him. 

“Okay, kiddos. Who wants tricks?” Buggy tucked the handkerchiefs under his sleeve and headed toward the kids. 

“WE WANT TRICKS!!!!” All ten little bodies stared at Buggy in admiration. 

Questions were constantly heard from around the table. “Is your hair real? Or is it a wig?”, “And where did you buy such a natural nose? Does it honk?”. The children shouted their names randomly, trying to get Buggy's attention.

“Either you calm down now or no tricks!” Catherine barked, glared angrily at the children and plopped down on the chair. “I can't!” She drank the juice from the nearest glass in one gulp.

“Hey, Miles!” Buggy said quietly, adjusting his sleeves. “I heard it's your birthday.”

“Yeah! Yeah!” Miles started stamping his feet on the spot. “My birthday, my party!” 

“And I also heard you were picking on that beautiful girl.” Buggy pointed at Catherine and clicked his tongue. “Not cool, bro.”

“Tattletale!!” Miles whispered to Catherine and showed his tongue. “I didn't mean to, Mister the Clown.” He pouted. “Sorry, miss.”

“I guess she's not mad at you anymore.” Buggy winked at Catherine. “And I also…. What's that?” He pointed somewhere behind the kids. 

Everyone at the table, including Catherine, looked around. 

“Where? I can't see anything!” She tried to figure out where he was pointing. 

“TA-DA!” Buggy's voice was heard. 

Catherine and all the kids turned around and saw him start to take out handkerchiefs from his sleeves. The children froze for a second and then suddenly burst into laughter, squeals and applause.

“Best trick ever!” Catherine started clapping. “You're the best clown I've ever seen in my life!”

Buggy began juggling tangerines, but he was also not very good at it. Then he started showing card tricks, he was a little better at this. The children squealed, shouted and stamped their feet at his every mistake, thinking it was part of the act. 

“Now I'm going to ask my lovely assistant to help me.” Buggy held out his hand to Catherine. 

“Who? Me?” She leaned closer to him. “Will you pick one of the children?”

“Nope.” Buggy winked at her. “Will my cotton candy help me?”

Catherine blushed, giggled and squealed quietly at the same time, and extended her hand to Buggy.

“Mister the Clown, can you make us a balloon dog? I'm Arthur, by the way.” A skinny, fair-haired boy covered in cake asked from the end of the table.

“Hello, Arthur!” Catherine said and bowed slightly. “Of course he will make an inflatable dog. Give us one minute!” She ran away for a second, picked up a sausage-shaped balloon and ran back. “Please, Mr. the Clown.” Catherine bowed like a true circus assistant, handing the balloon to Buggy.

“Cotton candy, I have no fucking idea how these dogs are made!” Buggy whispered quietly. 

“Think of something. I don't think they care what the outcome is. I think they just like you.” Catherine glanced out of the corner of her eye at the excited children.

Buggy groaned and tried to bend one part of the balloon to make a tail, the other part of the balloon to make a head. He twisted something resembling a twisted sausage in his hands for a long time.

“Something like that.” He showed this balloon misunderstanding to the children.

18 eyes looked at Catherine and Buggy, with the exception of Hilda, only blinking back.

“What's going on? Why are they silent?!” Catherine looked from the children to Buggy and took a step back just in case.

“I don't know.” Buggy nudged Catherine behind him. “I don't like this. I don't like it even more that they're looking at us the way you look at me just before you start squealing and jumping on me.” He nudged her back another step.

At that very moment the children burst into squeals and jumped up from their seats, running towards Catherine and Buggy. 

“Get back! Get back!” Buggy shouted at Catherine and took two big steps back.

“Hello, kids!” Mrs. Emmie's voice was heard and the children immediately ran to her. Several parents also came into the yard. 

“Am I alive? Or were we trampled?!!!” Catherine was ready to cry with delight, hugging Buggy. “Are you ok–?” 

“Miss Catherine! Mister Buggy! Hello! We are Miles' parents. Auggie and Trevor.” A short, stocky man with dark hair and grey-blue eyes, a tall, thin middle-aged woman with blue-black hair and blue eyes came closer to Catherine and Buggy. “Emmie said you helped us out. I hope the kids didn't torture you too much. Our son can be naughty sometimes.”

“Sometimes? Are you fucking kidding me?” Buggy barked. “Your kid–!”

Catherine kicked him in the leg. “It's okay, Miss Auggie. Miles's cute.” She giggled slightly. 

“Let me thank you with a cocktail!” Auggie invited Buggy and Catherine to the bar, where she poured them each a Long Island. They were talking when Miles approached his parents and tugged at his mother's dress. 

“Mom, where's my scooter? Daddy promised me a scooter!” He looked around. 

“Honey, you don't need a scooter yet, we bought you a kick scooter.” Auggie patted Miles on the head. 

“But I wanted a real scooter!” Miles stamped his foot. 

“Hah, you don't always get what you want, kid. I dreamed of being queen of the worms, but you see, my dreams were never meant to come true.” Catherine took a swig of her drink.

“Screw you!” Miles stamped his foot and stuck out his tongue to Catherine. 

“Miles! What kind of words were you saying?!” The boy's mom's eyes widened. 

“She said that bad word!” Miles pointed at Catherine. 

“What?!" Auggie looked at Catherine blinking. “Are you out of your mind?”

“It's time to go home, cotton candy!” Buggy threw Catherine over his shoulder and was about to run towards the door. 

“Wait! Wait! Wait!” Catherine grabbed four bottles of different alcohol and managed to grab a tray of snacks. “We dese-e-eerve it!!” She screamed as Buggy raced towards the apartment with her.

Buggy reached the apartment in seconds and closed the door. 

“Lock it all up! Lock it all up!” Catherine laughed, putting the bottles on the table. “God, I hope they don't get too mad at us.”

“Fuck them!” Buggy leaned his back against the door and looked at the large bottles of alcohol. “How did you even grab all that?”

Catherine shrugged, came closer and hugged him around the waist. “You hear that?” She chuckled. “Silence!” Catherine raised her head and looked at Buggy's tired and at the same shocked face. “Thank you! I couldn't have done it without you. You see, we have proven once again that we are a strong crew.” She kissed him on his nose. “And my silly clown..”

“I’m listening, my Cathie-pie.” 

“Don't get me wrong, I love you.” Catherine started stroking his head. “But from today on, I won't let you touch me without… well.. you know. I'll tell you more, you'll put on every single.. well, you know.. in the box on your little Buggy.” 

“Hey! He's not little!” Buggy kissed the top of Catherine’s head. “But for the first time in my life, I’m not gonna argue with you, cotton candy.”

[kedreeva]

Every year in the chicken groups we get people who find this "bump" on their chicks. They're freaking out, thinking it's a growth. I've even seen people who tried to pick it off!

Which no one should ever do, because this is the nipple for the bird's uropygial gland, colloquially known as the preen gland! It produces oil that they use in maintaining their feathers. They use their beaks to pull oil from this gland at the base of their tail, and then spread the oil around as they put their feathers in order.

It's neat to see it in a peafowl. Admittedly, I was only like 99% sure they had one (MOST birds do but not ALL, like ostriches don't have them), but despite looking through a lot of scientific journals about anatomy and preening behavior in peafowl, I couldn't find reference to one that would confirm it. Since she's so small, I thought to look while she was having a nap in my hand, and there it is!

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

Hi! My friend recommended your blog as a nice place for some research about Autism.

I've started to notice a few things and question if I could be autistic, but I wasn't able to find enough information about it while researching.

Do you have any info about how to identify autism in adults? It would help a lot 😊

Hi there,

I’ve found some resources. I’ll leave excerpts below. They are a bit long.

Common signs of autism in adults include:

* finding it hard to understand what others are thinking or feeling

* getting very anxious about social situations

* finding it hard to make friends or preferring to be on your own

* seeming blunt, rude or not interested in others without meaning to

* finding it hard to say how you feel

* taking things very literally – for example, you may not understand sarcasm or phrases like "break a leg"

* having the same routine every day and getting very anxious if it changes

Other signs of autism

You may also have other signs, like:

* not understanding social "rules", such as not talking over people

* avoiding eye contact

* getting too close to other people, or getting very upset if someone touches or gets too close to you

* noticing small details, patterns, smells or sounds that others do not

* having a very keen interest in certain subjects or activities

* liking to plan things carefully before doing them

Autism in women and men

Autism can sometimes be different in women and men.

Autistic women may:

* have learned to hide signs of autism to ‘fit in’ - by copying people who don’t have autism

* be quieter and hide their feelings

* appear to cope better with social situations

* show fewer signs of repetitive behaviours

This means it can be harder to tell you're autistic if you're a woman.

Common symptoms of autism in adults include:

* Difficulty interpreting what others are thinking or feeling

* Trouble interpreting facial expressions, body language, or social cues

* Difficulty regulating emotion

* Trouble keeping up a conversation

* Inflection that does not reflect feelings

* Difficulty maintaining the natural give-and-take of a conversation; prone to monologues on a favorite subject

* Tendency to engage in repetitive or routine behaviors

* Only participates in a restricted range of activities

* Strict consistency to daily routines; outbursts when changes occur

* Exhibiting strong, special interests

Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) is typically a life-long condition, though early diagnosis and treatment can make a tremendous difference.

Autism Symptoms in Adults at Home

Other peoples’ feelings baffle you. You have a collection of figurines on your desk that must be in the same order at all times. These, and other common manifestations of ASD, may be apparent in adults at home:

* Your family members lovingly refer to you as the “eccentric professor” of the family, even though you don’t work in academia.

* You’ve always wanted a best friend, but never found one.

* You often invent your own words and expressions to describe things.

* Even when you’re in a quiet place, like the library, you find yourself making involuntary noises like clearing your throat over and over.

* You follow the same schedule every day of the week, and don’t like unexpected events.

* Expressions like, “Curiosity killed the cat” or “Don’t count your chickens before they hatch” are confusing to you.

* You are always bumping into things and tripping over your own feet.

* In your leisure time, you prefer to play individual games and sports, like golf, where everyone works for themselves instead of working toward a common goal on a team.

Symptoms of ASD vary greatly from person to person based on the severity of the condition. These or similar manifestations of ASD may be apparent at work:

* When you’re having a conversation with your boss, you prefer to look at the wall, her shoes, or anywhere but directly into her eyes.

* Your co-workers say that you speak like a robot.

* Each item on your desk has a special place, and you don’t like when the cleaning company rearranges it to dust.

* You are really good at math, or software coding, but struggle to succeed in other areas.

* You talk to your co-workers the same way you talk with your family and friends.

* During meetings, you find yourself making involuntary noises, like clearing your throat over and over.

* When talking with your boss, you have difficulty telling if he is happy with your performance or mad at you.

In addition, autistic individuals may exhibit extraordinary talents in visual skills, music, math, and art. And roughly 40 percent of autistic individuals have average or above-average intelligence.

Some of the characteristics that adults with an autism diagnosis commonly report, include:

Communication

You may:

* Find joining in conversation difficult.

* Speak in a flat, monotone voice, or not speak.

* Have trouble relating to other people’s thoughts or emotions.

* Use repetitive language.

* Find it hard to read someone’s body language and emotions.

* Find that others don’t understand how you are feeling and say that “it is hard to know what you are thinking”.

* Dominate conversations and provide excessive information on the specific topics you are interested in.

* Find it easier to talk ‘at’ people, rather than engaging in a two-way conversation.

* Have trouble reading social cues.

* Find ‘small talk’ such as talking about the weather and what others are doing difficult.

* Take things literally. For example, if someone says ‘oh that’s a piece of cake’ or ‘you’re barking up the wrong tree’ you find it difficult to know what they mean.

* Be blunt in your assessment of people and things.

* Find it difficult to maintain eye contact when you are talking to someone.

* Have your own unique phrases and descriptive words.

* Find building and maintaining close friendships and relationships difficult.

* You may make faces that others find unusual.

* You may make gestures when speaking with people.

Behaviour

* You enjoy consistent routine and schedules and get upset or anxious should that routine or schedule be changed.

* You find it upsetting when something happens that you did not expect to happen.

* Have trouble regulating your emotional responses.

* Are bothered if your things are moved or rearranged by someone.

* Have a series of repetitive rituals or behaviours that you follow on a daily basis.

* You make noises in places where you are expected to be quiet.

* Preference for highly specific interests or hobbies that you spend a lot of time on.

* Have difficulty multi-tasking.

* Have a very strong reaction or no reaction at all to sensory stimuli, such as textures, sounds, smells and taste.

* Like operating solo – both at work and play.

I hope these sources help you. Thank you for the inbox. I hope you have a wonderful day/night. ♥️