#bumkeyz | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

alessandrxs-a · 5 years ago

Photo

* #𝐇𝐒𝐇𝐐𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐊𝟎𝟐𝟓 : 𝑷𝑼𝑩𝑳𝑰𝑪 𝑰𝑴𝑨𝑮𝑬 .

as the socialite of the family , alessandro takes his public image seriously & is very careful about how he portrays himself to acquaintances & the media . that being said , being a prince of such a powerful country is a reputation he knows he needs to uphold , however there are limits to even his practiced patience .

as he was raised , alessandro is perceived to be very respectful , friendly & welcoming by his peers . otherwise known as the socialite of the family , ale is known for being particularly pleasant to talk to , always being able to make a conversation out of anything & find some sort of common ground with the people he’s talking to . alessandro can also come across as being quite charming , forever being a people pleaser & having a good incline about what it is that people want to hear . his reputation is , regardless of there no doubt being a few slip ups from time to time , pretty impeccable & his intention is to keep it that way .

how he’s perceived by ��other people is very important to him , & it’s the main reason why he holds himself the way he does . after all , he has a country to represent & how people see him reflects on his family . not only that , but ale just enjoys being liked . he doesn’t necessarily have a fear of being disliked , but the idea of it drives him to be continuous in his image & the way he presents himself to other people . in general , he’s very refined & well - mannered , taking not only his mannerisms but also his appearance very seriously in terms of creating new contacts . he possesses the classic italian charm & isn’t afraid to show it .

as for his visuals , he makes sure to keep himself clean & polished . he’s definitely the sort of person who will spend an hour getting ready just to make sure he looks pleasing enough to impress people . his clothing is always ironed to the point where creases are pretty much nonexistent ( he’s a little bit of a perfectionist when it comes to this ) & his shoes are always polished almost to perfection . he rarely ever wears casual clothing , preferring to dress in mostly formal attire since he doesn’t know who he’ll bump into each day .

how he presents himself is something he’s perfected over the years , & most of the time comes to him automatically . there are the few odd moments where he’s almost robotically polite , specifically around people ( ilija ) that he’s not fond of , but his temperament very rarely lasts during those confrontations & this leads to him letting the part of him that he rarely ever lets anyone see , slip through . although he tends to hide it , ale can be pretty superficial & boastful , mostly in moments where he’s proven right or complimented , but he tries to humble himself in order for people not to see it .

although in general , he’s an easygoing & friendly person who can make new friends easier than most , sometimes this image is put on for show so that he can get his own way & the information that he seeks . alessandro can be trusted to a point . if you have a secret that doesn’t really affect him or many others , he’ll take it to the grave . but if the secret is something regarding politics & will affect a mass amount of people , particularly those in his country , he’ll be reporting it to the first person he sees . he misleads these sort of conversations by listening deeply , maintaining eye contact & a friendly smile , all while his ulterior motive isn’t just to be a weight bearer .

all in all , how he’s seen by the public is something he enjoys immensely . he loves nothing more than meeting new people & learning all sorts of things about them , being easily intrigued & inquisitive . if you were to ask him , he’d tell you he’s exactly where he’s supposed to be in society . a little like a chameleon , he enjoys being able to ease into social circle after social circle in order to either create new connections or gain the information he seeks .

#hshqtask025 #idek ?? if this is what the task asked for but #it is what it is dhfjv #template creds to bumkeyz !!#* ☁️ ⁺ ◞ 𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐫𝐨 𝐝𝐢 𝐬𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐢𝐚 ∶ task .

2 notes · View notes

hiirato · 3 years ago

Text

★☆ you’re visiting [ @𝐇𝐈𝐈𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐎 . . . ] owned by 𝒓𝒆𝒅 , twenty four. they/she. pst . . . ☉ leo ☽ virgo ↑ libra . . . infj-t . . . stand user !

please review my carrd prior to following and / or interacting . . . if you’re looking for my roleplay resources . . . visit hqzoro ♡ * 𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐃 𝐌𝐄 : twitter ♡ buy me a coffee ♡ ask for my discord !

[ my 𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒗𝒊𝒐𝒖𝒔 urls ] stanjotaro . . . kuroshitsujii & bumkeyz. ★☆

#♡ pls do not rb ♡

10 notes · View notes

meltalks · 4 years ago

Text

my experience with addy / hiqey

i’ve contemplated posting my history with addy/hiqey for awhile now. my friends have encouraged me to do so, but due to her stance in the rpc i was always far too scared to do so. with all that is coming to light with her recently, not only is a huge weight off my shoulders as far as comfortably roleplaying as my escape, but knowing i’m not alone. my story with addy dates back to about september 2018. i do warn you this will be long, and i’ll try to include enough details to make it make sense while not dragging things on and on. this includes both my personal relationship with addy, as well as my experience with her in groups one where she she was an admin, and groups where i was an admin. as well as i believe we coadmined one together. i’ve put screenshots where i could, but some of this dates back to 2018 and i just don’t have access to those texts/rp accounts anymore.

a huge huge shout out to @bumkeyz for starting this avalanche, and for also supporting me one on one along with all my friends to feel safe enough to come forward. i’ll put all of my story under a read more.

i’m going to start this by saying, my name is mel/melanie. you may have heard of me because back when addy was on rpslayed she wasn’t a big fan of me for awhile. predominantly my group the cape(?) the main isn’t up anymore so i can’t remember the exact @. i’m 21 years old, i will be 22 this month. i am married & i have a 3 year old daughter. this is information i don’t normally tell people i’m married / have a child, because well, i just feel a little judged. not because anything anyone has specifically done or said, but my own anxieties worried that people will think it’s weird to be married with a child and still in twitter rp. but it is important to my story with addy, which is why i’m letting everyone know right off the bat.

i met addy in a group called producers. this group is from september 2018, so i’m not able to access anything right now, but am digging. i played (feel free to clown me) a g-eazy character named pierce. addy played a carlson young who’s name i can’t quite recall, and a gracie abrams named lolly. lolly & pierce became friends first & at some point we exchanged phone numbers. lolly & pierce flirted a lot, pierce was a player yada yada. eventually she ended up getting a different ship on lolly & pushed her carlson young onto pierce. pierce had a different love interest & didn’t end up going for her. this should’ve been the first negative sign/red flag. when pierce didn’t get with her character, she got very short & snarky ic and ooc. i believe both of her characters blocked me ic. even though pierce had made no ic promises to either to not be with someone else. we still maintained some level of friendship, but she was extremely weird about when i mentioned my ship. our friendship ended for a few months because of an incident that started ic between me and another character. the mun who played this character and i had bonded ooc over having been pregnant, we talked somewhat often about her dealings with her pregnancy. so i felt close enough/friendly enough with this mun that when something happened with her character & another character ic i dm’ed her to see if she was ok .long story short it went bad. i texted addy and told her that. i explained that i felt as if this mun & i were close and it was like dm’ing a friend. she held onto the fact that i shouldn’t have messaged her. when i didn’t immediately conform to her thought she kicked me out of the group. i was literally devastated. i loved that group, that character, my ship; all of it. she blocked me. though this story is 2 paragraphs long, it’s minor in the grand scheme of things. after this she smeared me on rpslayed for months until our paths crossed again in a group called glitches/glitch? we decided to squash our beef. this was december 2019.

in december 2019 we became friends again. honestly, i wish we never crossed paths. we got very close right away. she started telling me about a bad friendship she had, with someone we mutually knew from producers who i will not name since it’s not my place to put their name in this, and gained my sympathy. so much so that i ended a friendship with that person based solely on accusations that addy had told me. this is something that i can now realize i did wrong. i literally cussed this person out on the phone, solely based off things addy told me. i didn’t listen to someone who had been my friend for months, who defended me and picked me up when addy was tearing me down on rpslayed. i turned my back because addy convinced me to. she made this person seem awful. and again, i’m not naming them, but they know exactly who they are. and when thy do read this, i’m sorry.

now this is where things get out of hand. addy & i begun an intimate relationship. this is very personal, and i know some may pass judgment. but my husband was cool with it. addy also began talking to my husband, they texted. we had a groupchat. not to get into details about the relationship, but it was romantic. i am going to try and organize my thoughts. into themes.

money

this relationship lasted from about january ish to april romantically. i became addy’s crutch. she began going through personal issues with her family. and i started sending her money. to be frank i don’t remember how it started. i helped her with a job search, supporting her through these tough things that were going on. the money started casually i suppose. it was $10 for lunch. $25 for nails. but then it got worse. i bought her a phone. and slowly she grew more entitled to my money. asking for it. demanding it. guilting me when i didn’t give it. i lied to her and told her i lost my credit card and turned it off, but the guilt i had i told her that i could turn it on when she needed it. in screenshots i will post below she guilted me because i was sick and fell asleep before turning my card on. whether what she’s saying occured is true or not, it was just one example of how she made me feel. at one point she had my credit card on her uber, and charged nearly $400 of ubers on my credit card that i didn’t know about. she claimed it was an accident, because i let her put my card on her account under the agreement that she would turn it off. we had an agreement of what she would pay me back, some things that i got her were gifts and i didn’t want/need back. other things it was always an agreement she would pay me back. however whenever i would mention sending me a payment she had an excuse. one time even guilting me by reminding me how much better i have it than she does. all in all i spent / sent upwards of $2500/$3000 on her. only about $1500/$1800 i wanted back. i never saw a dime back, she never made good on her promises. at some point i gave up on asking.

ETA: as far as the uber situation goes, she did apologize and state that it was never on purpose when i found out that there was nearly $500 in charges. she said she thought she was charging her moms card. this shows a photo of 1 page of a 5 page statement of all the transactions put on my card by her in one month. there are only 6 of these transactions that were me. all of the ubers and venmo were her. i didn’t make her take off my card, which in hindsight was obviously a very bad decision. i just didn’t want to leave her stranded without ways to get home/where she needed to be.

this is her demanding money. this was in the summer. at this point i was so manipulated by her/scared of her/scared of losing her that i didn’t know how to say no. in this instance i deflected with a picture of my child. screen shot.

in the screenshots here, this is where i fell asleep. i was on vacation and got extremely dehydrated in the sun. i literally felt so sick and she made me feel guilty for falling asleep. X X X

this screenshot shows one of the times i actually asked her when she would repay me. at this point my credit card was nearly maxed out from ubers and sending her money. i was anxious about it and she made me feel bad for asking because her situation was worse than mine. this was the same day she asked me for $250 for a down payment on her car. X asking for money. X making me feel bad for asking when she’s gonna pay.

literally to this day im still in credit card debt because of this. yes i make good money, yes my husband does too. but credit card debt is hard and everyone knows it. i do fine for myself, but i don’t have hundreds extra to pay this down.

also, i cannot locate the bank screenshot. but as recent as this february, six months since she spoke to me, she still had my card on her uber and usted it again. i can’t find the screenshot of the actual of the bank transaction because i’ve completely had to close that account for fraud and transfer my balance to a new card. but here is a screenshot from february 12 where i tell my friends i caught her doing it. X .

manipulation in groups/related to groups

orbis. i ran a group called orbis, it was a reality show group. addy was one of my friends who really wanted me to open it. all of my groups i’ve adminned i’m the lead. i just always take on that roll so i do get very busy with them on top of my real life. i work full time and i’m a mom so i spread myself thin.she made me feel really guilty for this, saying i wasn’t giving her enough time, she wasn’t anyones dog. so i posted my unfollow. then she told me i was stupid for doing that. so i deleted my unfollow. then she said that me deleting my unfollow showed that i didn’t really care how she felt. screens. X X

lumeer. very similar situation to above. only this time i left the group completely for about 3 weeks. i called my coadmin crying about what she was doing to me, sent her the psds and templates for grpahics and left fully, though i helped them out if issues arose/they needed anything.

impulse. this was recently and this got brought to the tags. im going to copy & paste what i sent to bumkeyz as far as the story goes for what happened.

“ what happened in impulse is only one of several examples of addy being awful in groups i've adminned. this goes back to our friendship but specifically here's what happened in impulse. addy played a character named briar, the other characters involved were as mentioned in other posts loki & khalil (fai fc). one of he first days of the group khalil hooked up with both loki & briar. when the "updates" account posted about loki & khalil's hook up (we posted any and all plot drops that were sent in, it was a reality show so we consistently updated what the cameras caught), briar got upset on main. addy then messaged khalil's mun ooc and asked for the plot to be erased. essentially because she didn't like that khalil had hooked up with both her and another girl in the same day/same manor. as odd of a request as i was the khalil mun agreed to wipe it & asked that if there was anything that ever came up again that made addy uncomfortable to please not hesitate to dm. addy then softblocked khalil. which is strange. why soft block with briar's reason to dislike khalil has been wiped? that night addy posted on her personal tumblr hiqey "i forgot all fai khadra fcs are weirdos" or soemthing along that line. the khalil mun reasonably got uncomfortable with that, but was softblocked & didn't tell the main. they just ignored it since their characters weren't interacting now. for the next few days addy continued to shade khalil and loki on main, despite any ic reason for disliking them being wiped. loki then approached briar IN CHARACTER asking what was wrong/why she was shading/why they didn't like her. i don't know all the details of that conversation, but i know it ended with loki saying she was going to block briar & briar saying that was fine. bear in mind the admins had no idea any of this was happening at this point. addy then dmed the main, playing victim. after more shading of khalil, khalil's mun decided to block briar as well. addy despite wiping this plot and having 0 ic communication with khalil continued to shade the characters ic. so addy dmed the main playing innocent. asking for us to have them unblock, saying she had no idea why they blocked or what she did. as admins we had no idea why either, figured it was something ic so we dmed both muns. khalil's mun agreed after some hestiation, and asked if they had to follow her and i said no. they didn't elaborate. loki's mun however refused, & i'm glad she did because she told us what was going on. of course once we were told everyting we didn't make her unblock. up until we told addy that we were not going to make those muns unblock her, she was extremely sweet to us. she praised us on her rpt. said she loved the group. fed the main compliments. but when she didn't get her way out of us, and was essentially told on, she started causing issues on the timeline with different characters. she sent us a dm on the main telling us to "learn how to handle your group melanie" and deactivated before i could get a chance to reply. “

what i didn’t tell bumkeyz is that deejay/rpslayed played khalil. another example of addy’s manipulation is that when she saw deejay getting anons she followed deejay and texted her after several months of no communication, starting to tell her side of the story and play innocent -- not knowing that deejay was the person who was behind khalil the entire time. she made khalil out to be the bad guy, not knowing that it was deejay. after finding out deejay and i were friends, when deejay posted on rpslayed for people to follow me shortly after trying to get deejay on her side, addy blocked us both (again).

manipulation between friends (?)

i don’t really know a great way to title this, but this is similar to the situation i mentioned with the unnamed person above -- how addy made me think that person was the worst so i would stop being friends with them. this is a few more examples of that.

the entire time i was friends with addy, she told me that deejay hated me. she told me that deejay was convinced that i was this person who tried to get her kicked out of a group. she told me that she did her very best to convince deejay that it wasn’t true, but no matter what she did deejay just hated me. nearly a year later deejay and i cross paths in a group. we started talking ooc and i mentioned this. i asked her why she thought that was me. we found out that basically, while addy was telling me she was trying to convince deejay it wasn’t me, she was telling deejay that it was me. she would also tell me personal information about deejay that i had no business knowing, whether it be real life information or just telling me the groups deejay adminned when she knew deejay didn’t want anyone knowing.

i have found out recently that addy has recently been telling people a lie about when she came to visit me. on one evening when she visited me in june of 2019, we went to my friend’s house. we both drank, and smoked. i am someone who neither drinks nor smokes, and i got a very bad mix from it. my anxiety sky rocketed. i was crying on my friends couch practically paralyzed. i didn’t want to move. i felt sick. i felt scared. my friends were going to drive us back to my house and shortly before we were about to walk out addy said she needed to go to the hospital. my friend’s boyfriend drove her there, and when he came back they took me home. this night is very blurry for me. i remember barely being able to see straight, my friend helped me walk to and from the car. addy has told her friends that i refused to pick her up from the hospital that night, and i’ve now heard this from two of her close friends. when in reality, i was so far gone that not only was i sick and scared, but i couldn’t see straight. i had absolutely no ability to be behind a wheel. i’m not surprised she twisted this against me.

i provided a few people screenshots where addy was telling me to block them/trying to convince me that they were awful and hurting me. at the same time that addy was telling me this, she was doing the opposite to them -- to keep us apart. i believe this is some sort of power. always wanting to be everyones number one.

i don’t have a lot of screenshots for this, so i won’t go into much detail, but i can say on more than one occasion, or more than five or ten she told me who to and not to be friends with. told me to block people who had been our friends who were no longer friends with her.

flat out manipulation.

i don’t want to go back through my texts too much honestly. it’s still a sore spot. it still sucks and it still hurts. but i think anyone and everyone involved with addy at some point or another has similar stories about the way she treats her friends. there were points where i begged. begged and begged her not to leave me. i can’t even count how many times she blocked and unblocked me. how many times she made me feel the worst and then came back. she came back because she knw i was there. and that my generosity was practically endless. i couldn’t say no to her, frankly i can’t say no to anyone. if anyone dmed me today and said hey i need $15 for a ride home. i’d probably send it. that’s just how i am. addy completely had me wrapped around her finger. to the point that i left friends who were good to me. i left my own groups i worked hard on. i nearly ended my engagement (which cannot be entirely blamed on her, but the relationship she and i had was built off lots of manipulation). i know that i could go find 100 screenshots and texts of her manipulating me but honest i just don’t want to do that to myself again. she has made me out to be the villain to anyone she can. i have had 2 different people tell me that she told them i say the n word, which is the furthest thing from the truth. i fear the things she’s said about me to people. if she can 100% make something up, what can she twist from actual arguments or issues we had?

i know this sounds like a lot of rambling for nothing. but for nearly two years i’ve lived in fear in the rpc of addy. less so when we were friends. i’ve feared telling my side because i felt invalid. frankly even as i type this im scared. scared she’s already convinced everyone i’m awful and no one will read this or care. i just am thankful that this finally came to light. i am glad that i won’t feel scared anymore. roleplay is my one place to be free. as a mother, a full time worker, i don’t have a lot of time for hobby’s and frankly i don’t have a lot of them. i don’t draw, or read. i like to write. and i’m just thankful this can finally be lifted off me.

#twitter rp #rpt #rpc #rph #addy tw #hiqey

116 notes · View notes

pocmuzings · 4 years ago

Note

So i’ve been tossing up saying anything but bumkeyz/Red started talking about Addy/Hiqey and i have to admit i’m not comfortable with the way she responds to POC having valid concerns about her and her behaviour. She minimalises it, jokes about it, or just refuses to address it. I’m not saying to “cancel” Addy, but if she can talk about so much other stuff, why can’t she talk about how she’s continuously dismissing POC but tokenizing us/ using us at bandwagon-y moments?

so i haven’t said anything abt this and i’ve left this in my inbox because i guess i was trying to figure out what to write in response and also i wasn’t online as Much . firstly , thank you for coming forward and saying something anon ! ur feelings are valid ! as is my “ style “ of late , i did message addy to say i had received an ask abt her . to which she responded ( verbatim ) :

“ don’t link me. i’m not in the rpc, i’m not really gonna deal with it. you can say that if anyone wants to speak to me my ims are open! but i’m not making any public declarations, and i’ve stated that. you can still post and do as you please otherwise bc i respect what you do wholeheartedly “

which u can all take away how you want . so . i won’t link her because she asked not to and that she doesn’t want to state anything further and that’s up to her . but i want to make it very very clear that i stand with @bumkeyz and every anon who has spoken out and i believe there’s validity in the things they say . not addressing anything is not speaking up and there’s a complicitness with your behaviour by doing that, and a dismissiveness to poc by not wanting to openly address the issues raised . as she did say , her ims are open , but idk how constructive that can be bc i know it’s scary to come off anon and the Dismissiveness u can receive is wild sometimes but if u wanna speak to her abt it / feeling strong enough to talk , then definitely try ims !!! i understand and i listen and i stand with you . if there’s anything further i can somehow do or help with , pls let me know ! everybody : please stay kind and stay open with conversation . please listen to one another ! everyone has valid feelings in this situation and sending hate is never Productive .

#shutup g.#anonymous

22 notes · View notes

blasphemie · 4 years ago

Text

you know, @bumkeyz, i think it’s very nasty for you to say i have some kind of privilege in all of this. we don’t get to pick and choose who was affected by addy and her actions. just because you see the shit that we posted on tumblr, does not mean you have the full story. and i’m gonna be honest... fuck you and the anon in my inbox for making me feel like i MUST talk about my own trauma because if i didn’t, i was staying silent for her.

when i say my brain couldn’t handle this, it’s because of outside factors that i won’t get into and the fact i had the stark realization that i was in fact manipulated by addy. it’s been hard to come to terms with and all i wanted to do with that ask was highlight that i did not stand by her. but fine, you want the long post of it all, so here ya go.

here’s my story. my side of things. read if you want, or don’t.

tw : manipulation , guilt tripping .

i’m not going to pretend like i remember when addy and i met. all i remember is something was happening in the rpc and i was involved in some discourse and she came into my ims offering support. i was very leery of her at this point, as she had just come back from her stay with rpslayed. tumblr won’t let me reopen those ims now she’s deleted that old blog, but i know that i did reply. it went from that discourse, to the one she was having with B, someone that took advantage of her. and again, i have morals to uphold, so of course i went off about it. through all of this, i started to believe she had changed - which was a large lapse in my own judgement at the time, but we became friends. i wish i hadn’t NOW, but that’s not something i can change now.

i have a terrible memory as i’ve stated, so again, i’m not going to be able to give dates on this one either, but you know how there was an asterisked name in certain posts of her’s? yeah that was my name right up until her current boyfriend. me and addy had this... thing going. more of like a back and forth, will they won’t they. i wish it was as poetic as some wattpad fic because that’s where i begin to realize i was manipulated. the biggest thing i can remember is the whole situation concerning my best friend, who is also my ex-boyfriend. something that was truly one sided occurred between them and soon it was such a big thing that me and him were friends. one time, she did not even talk to me for days and would only add like an emphasis or thumbs down to my imessage texts ( idk what they’re called but you get me ) . i was constantly made to feel bad that my ex was my best friend, i remember once she found out we wanted to make a rp together and was all “im going back to bed”. i once made a post that said “you know it’s real if i send you tiktoks” and tagged him in it and that again, led to her ghosting me because she didn’t feel important enough to me or whatever.

i remember there was this time we didn’t talk for a certain amount of time, so i blocked her thinking we weren’t friends. and then i get this over cashapp.

i won’t lie. addy has given me money. she gave me money when i really needed it and i think that’s why i didn’t want to speak against her. because i didn’t want her to think i had just been using her for money because i know at one point that is what she thought of me. but anyway, at this point, i’m like oh so we ARE friends ? and i’ve just been thrown back and forth so much with her that it was normal to me at this point. so we reconnected. i think the guilt over accepting money from someone kept me by her side and kept me standing up for her.

people who know me know i’m not an active replier sometimes. i sometimes disappear for days at a time and come back. that’s just who i am. addy didn’t like this. i remember once she was mad at me because i posted a screenshot of something my friend said and again, i was ghosted. this is how even part of that went.

the entire thing is that i respect people’s boundaries. but this stemmed from a place of pettiness. this was the aftermath of that btw once i was softblocked.

things like this also occurred.

it felt like i was being PUNISHED for not replying. when i don’t reply, it’s not because i want to make someone not feel as if they’re not important to me, which is something she tried to say me posting a screenshot of someone else was me saying.

on the subject of the sexual jokes / allegations from other people : i had NO idea then that they were being made to everyone, especially minors. i thought it was something that was exclusive to people she liked. it became clear to me that she did make those jokes to everyone, but never, EVER to minors. please do not say i stand with someone whose said that shit to kids, because i would never. i’ve been at the receiving end of those and some were consensual, but not all, but i do digress.

ya know, i was always was to be blame for a failed almost relationship because don’t get me wrong, i did like addy. but i’ll also be the first to admit i am a VERY closed off person, but i still flirt with people a lot. but it was always pointed out to me that it was very clearly my fault, no matter if i apologized. it was always my fault. i always hurt her feelings ( to the point she would delete my number and contact entirely ) . it was just always, ALWAYS salt’s fault, she never let me forget that. i remember indirects were made about me such as this.

btw this right here, was made BEFORE the “who gonna tell me” post, which she ended up deleting and then posting those.

i remember even when i would TRY with her by saying hmu if you want to watch a movie, she would reply with “go ask [ex bf]” or when i reconnected with an flame she would say “whatever go flirt with [name]”. go do this, go do that.

but the kicker? she would always come back and act like nothing happened. and i would always be in such a state of whiplash with this. she would flirt with me again and i would flirt back because that’s what i was used to.

when she got in her newest relationship, it all kind of came to a close, except if i made a joke about it all, she would say i hurt her feelings and lash out about it all. i was STILL made to feel bad about it even when she was in a relationship.

i think at the end of the day, i should and WILL take full accountability for even becoming friends with her in the first place due to her past. i could’ve easily stopped all of this happening to me if i had not made that ONE decision. at the end of the day, i was still manipulated, i was still made to feel like trash over a failed relationship, and i let it happen because i had feelings for her AND she had helped me out when i most needed it. but i’ll be dammed if i let someone say i had a PRIVILEGE in this situation when i felt like i had to stay friends with her because of the money or because she would say some shit about me if i tried to not be friends with her. and while there is so much more i could pull up and show y’all, i do not feel like going through all of that. just know this pattern is what i experienced for upwards of a year or so.

you can believe what you want or feel how you want about me. it doesn’t change a damn thing that happened to me and i’m so, SO tired of being silent.

- salt.

#rpt #rpc #tags it so yall will see it ig #manipulation cw #guilt tripping cw #addy cw #anon is off btw bc of tht one i got while writing this

21 notes · View notes