#budgeting tho....budgeting i enjoy helping people figure out their money

[brehaaorgana]

#looks like it's not a predatory free trial either!#you only get charged if you subscribe after your free trial#which is really nice

Thanks for pointing that out, yes!!! this is true!!!

They do NOT auto-charge after the Free Trial ends. (Signing up via a 3rd party app may still take your card info like any other app download does, but I don't think it auto-charges.):

Text: One week before your trial ends: - ✉️ We will send a reminder before your trial expires. Day 34: - ⌛️ Free trial ends. No need to cancel! You won’t be charged unless you subscribe* -🙌 Select a subscription plan to keep improving your financial future. *when you sign up directly through YNAB; third-party app stores may require credit card information when signing up for a trial.

YNAB will send you a reminder your trial is coming to an end, and then on Day 34, they don't charge you anything until you select what subscription plan you want. And, because it's a budgeting program, one of the first things they recommend you do during the trial is budget for the potential subscription cost! which is great because a) i literally would have forgotten about the subscription and b.) it made me actually plan ahead to spend the money if I realized I DID want to use it.

I can't remember if it's automatically a category you can fill in when you first log in to set up, or if they have a suggestion to create the category. It's been a minute since I've done it. But I do remember it being mentioned.

OTHER GOOD NEWS:

You get a free YEAR if you are a student (Q: I am a grad student, medical resident, international student, and/or part-time college student. Do I qualify? A: Sure thing! As long as you’re in college, you’re a college student!)

This works even with non-US currencies and Banks. ("Direct import currently supports select US, Canadian, UK, and EU Banks. If you don’t live in any of those regions, File-Based Import works like a charm.")

if you run or work for a non-profit helping w/ financial literacy in underrepresented and marginalized communities, you can apply for the YNAB for Good program which donates free YNAB subscriptions to orgs for giving to people in the community they service.

yay!

ADHD money/budgeting system I'm currently using for my benefit is going well (I've been using it for like half a year now?), and I wanna recommend it.

You Need a Budget is EXCELLENT. 10/10 do recommend. Uhhh rambling about it and my generic disclaimers + gushing extensively under the cut but TL;DR I think it's great for ADHD ppl, I've used it for 6+ months now and I find it super SUPER helpful. also weirdly fun.

DISCLAIMERS:

Budgeting helps you understand/know your money, it can't make money appear where there is none.

Everyone should learn to budget even if you don't have much money (especially then)

This is NOT a magic trick solution. Just like everything else, it is an assistive tool. This is one of those adult things we can't simply opt out of without negative consequences, though.

My advice is based on something I am currently able to do. That is, I can spend an amount of money on this specific thing that works well for me. If you have no extra money to spend then previously I was tracking things in a notebook. So you can still do this.

I believe Dave Ramsey is a fundie fraud/hack and no one should listen to him about money.

DID YOU KNOW THEY CANCELLED MINT???

Okay? OKAY.

Ahem.

You Need a Budget is EXCELLENT.

It is called YNAB for short. The first 34 days are your free trial, and that is my referral link. If anyone uses it and then signs up for a subscription, we both get a month free. Also you can share a subscription with up to six people (account owner can see everything but individuals can pick and choose what they share amongst each other) so like...idk your whole polycule can be on one account. Or your kids. Whatever.

If you are a student, it's free for a year. If you aren't, a subscription is $99 for a year (paid all at once) or $14.99 monthly, which is equivalent to paying Amazon prime. Go cancel Prime and get this instead tbh.

They got a whole article just on ynab and ADHD. They also have like...a big variety of ways to access their info? They have a book, podcast episodes, YouTube videos, blog posts, q&A's, free live workshops you can join (you can request live captioning), emails they can send (if you want) a wiki, and so on. They got workshops on all kinds of topics!!

So whatever ends up working for your brain. It also has a matching app.

If you lost Mint this year they have a gajillion things for moving from Mint.

Also they have a "got five minutes?" Page which has a slider so you can decide how much attention/time you have before going on lol:

They only have 4 rules of the budget, they're simple and practical, and it doesn't get judgey or like...mean about your spending.

1. Give every dollar a job 2. Embrace your true expenses 3. Roll with the punches 4. Age your money.

THEN THEY BREAK THESE DOWN INTO SMALL STEPS FOR YOU! They even have a printable! Also these rules are great because there's built in expectations that things WILL HAPPEN and it's NOT all or nothing with a fear of total collapse into failure. Reality and The Plan don't always align, especially if you have ADHD. So it's directing our energy towards the true expenses and not clinging to The Plan!! over reality.

You can automate a lot of shit (you can sync with your bank accounts just like mint, but also automate tagging the categories of regular expenses/transactions). And if for whatever reason you accidentally do something that makes the budget look weird or wrong:

A) you can usually fix it somehow OR b) they have like, a button you can press that gives you a clean slate and archives the previous version of the budget for you.

So if you forget for a few weeks or months, or accidentally input something wildly wrong, or just don't want to look at a really terrible month anymore and feel like you need a fresh start you can usually either fix it or start fresh which is really nice.

The app also (for whatever reason) scratches my itch to have things like...have incentives or little game-like goals in a way mint never did? I don't know why. Filling up the bars or putting money into the categories to cover my expenses is satisfying lmao. You can also make a big wish expense category for all the fun shit you want, and fund it whenever you can and then you can see the little bar go up and that's fun.

Anyways I've been using it for like 6+ months now and I think it's really helped me when I use it.

[polygonsexual]

A whole pecking essay on why I love Garten of BanBan and my perspective on it

____

So I bought and played all the chapters. I did watch the gameplays and Then finished all of them, twice! And Even from the first chapter, I actually never thought the game is bad! In fact, I very much enjoyed it.

I’ll go over three, maybe?.. topics in this silly essay. I’m sleepy, it’s 4 am so I don’t know for sure but I really want to express my opinion:’D

Ps. Spoilers will be outlined with this color, sorry if I left something out, you can let me know tho!

The topics are:

——————————

1. Style

2. Gameplay

3. Character writing

——————————

So Style is the first thing people found off putting and lazy about this game , from the first chapter I actually kind of enjoyed it. Yes it’s simplistic and used some free stock models, but there was something about it..this simplicity is well organised. Starting with the Main cast(BanBan’s friends) they look very simple from afar. But if you look closer you see how many little veins and details they have, and as mutants made out of unknown substance it makes sense! It’s only an illusion of simplicity, they are terrifying biological monstrosities that were made to look like kid’s mascots, adds up , doesn’t it?

Now for the free samples, I don’t know if there’s much of them in the chapter 3 or 4, as those two are where the quality really starts to rise, but I can excuse it for the first two chapters, each chapter costs like 3 dollars , considering there’s only two devs working on the game and they also have college. I respect the prices and don’t regret spending my money, after all, it’s not that much and helps them make each chapter better then last one, considering that, they did start using less free samples with the 3 and 4 chapters, You can correct me if I’m wrong, but I can tell that I didn’t notice anything that felt out of place in those two chapters and that’s what makes a difference.

Overall surroundings are more polished now too, it’s a mix of a facility and kinder Garten, they worked with children but they had to keep it professional with the huge void under the facility. It can explain the amount of bottomless pits in the game and odd mix of professional and childish ornaments in the rooms. Also the safety hazards can be explained too! BanBan did talk about “we should have spoken up sooner” and that really makes it seem like the heads of the facility didn’t really care for safety of their workers, so much they ignored the countless containment breaches of the specimens , death of facility workers and maybe even children..

Im getting a bit sidetracked with the lore here, but with such simple yet memorable style, I think they did a great job. It doesn’t fit well with the established mascot horror quality, but it has it’s charm and I think a game about a scientific facility turned into a kindergarten wouldn’t feel the same with some complicated high budget textures.

Talking about high budget textures.. I don’t really like what the two weeks remaster of Garten of BanBan did with the game, maybe yeah it added more detail to the surroundings, but it stopped giving away this too polished and deeply fake childcare center feeling, and man, Opila bird does look much better in the original, mutants don’t even have blood and are supposed to look like cartoons, not whatever this guy did to them.

—————-

Gameplay

[Puzzles]

That’s something I heard complaints about a lot, but In my opinion, I didn’t see anything wrong with the gameplay, it’s easy yes, but that’s what makes it good, you can easily fly through the game without getting stuck on some task you just can’t figure out(Except snail hall we all suffered there at least for two tries). In fact, the tasks are actually enjoyable, specially in chapter 4! They are more fast paced and give you more to work with, but I can go as far as to say that I liked puzzles even from the second game, as Yet again, they are simple but still make you think a bit, which gives you a satisfaction of solution without getting stuck in one place for hours. The simplicity of the puzzles fits with the overall kindergarten style, in fact some of the tasks were made as entertainment for the workers, which explains why they are supposed to be more entertaining then difficult, obviously Chapter 4 has the best puzzles, specially when you have lil beak around and can take her everywhere. But looking back at the older ones, they were neat too!I liked the first puzzle in chapter 2 where you have to press buttons depending on the worker’s rate on the board, it’s extremely simple but satisfying non the less, plus I kinda failed it..twice on my second run because I was rushing.

[Drone]

The drone is a nice puzzle tool if you get the hang of it, people rush a lot when using it and usually that’s what makes it an annoying experience, (Drone is indeed good mental support, you can’t prove me wrong>:)) Maybe you could call it a useless unreasonable problem maker, but those are not more then another puzzles you have to solve, maybe you don’t like to solve so many puzzles, well that’s your opinion I don’t judge, but it’s kinda a base game mechanic that devs wanted to space out the main events and puzzles with. And I think it works quite well, with all the different tasks you have to do here and there, getting back to a mechanic that you recognise and is used to is a good thing to keep you busy but not overwhelmed. It was kind of unnecessary in chapter 2 but I think devs did a great job on the new ones, they don’t use it to open each door and manage it quite well with other more differing puzzles.

[Chase sequences/Boss fights]

I must say the chase sequences in this game are quite boring most of the time, the main issue is how extended and slow paced they feel, sprinting doesn’t really feel like sprinting and there’s not much dynamic in the chase, it’s a quick time event, but even for how simple BanBan is, those are just too simple, it would be nice if the boss fights had more to them then dodge or run away and stuff, I must say, if you know what to do in a kittyzaurus fight, it’s quite enjoyable! But the chameleon-turtle one is just meh, it’s just too long and doesn’t have much going on, main focus is only the attacks that happen very slowly, kittyzaurus fight is good because it gives you less time to prepare for the Kitty’s dash into your direction, so you actually have to constantly move and keep focus on the boss. For good side, the snail hall(chapter 2) nabNab chase in the werehouse (chapter 2) and bird riding(chapter 3) were a highlight, they had a challenge in them, an additional task that makes the running away process much more entertaining and I hope that the devs will do this more in the future!

[additional thoughts]

What I also hear people complain about is how spaced out and long the backtracking is, and sadly I have to agree here, as I said before sprinting in this game doesn’t feel like sprinting, and you become quickly frustrated by going through so many hallways over and over again, like the distance between Queen’s lobby and elevator is painfully long, it didn’t had to be so big. I hope there will be shortcuts in the next chapters so players could skip the long walks in the empty hallways:’) Also want to leave a thought here that chapters 2 and 4 final chases felt meh, but the build up on the 4th is something worthy talking about! That’s what next topic is about.

—————————

Character writing

A LOT OF SPOILERS stop reading here and go straight to conclusions if you don’t want to get spoiled

BanBan

That’s probably going to be my favourite topic, as Chapter 4 really opened my eyes on the character’s situation, relations and interactions, and again I really hope they’ll do more in the future! Let’s begin with Banban, as I see his storyline as the most interesting one. It’s said in the notes that BanBan is “the devil” who believes to be a human and completely ignores his mutant appearance, in chapter 4 we get his inside oh now his friends betrayed him, looked at him like he’s a monster and didn’t talk to him at all , leaving him when all in the facility started to crumble. First, BanBan’s DNA is mixed up with a DNA of one of the workers, which could very well explain his tired , careless and very human voice. BanBan believes he is human, he acts like one, cares for others like a human, feels betrayed because he always thought he is one. His friends looked at him like at a monster because he was created one, but he never realised that, thinking they turned their backs on him for no reason, as he still thinks he’s one of them. That could also explain why he is the only one who’s actually willing to help us find our children outside of Queen and Sheriff..maybe he’s willing to help, I can’t really tell. But if you think about it, BanBan’s situation is frocking sad and very much understood, with his sudden switches to devilish hunger and thirst for organs, he is trying to get out of the facility and help the mutants at the same time, maybe he sees them as humans too?… He surely tried to fix NabNab, as he said several times, he’s genuinely trying to help and bring back senses to them , refusing or just not knowing it’s impossible. It can explain his trauma when he killed NabNab in chapter 4, it’s his snap and finale , he tried to save them , but ended up hurting with this “devil side” , and it’s obvious he regrets every time it happens, he was very sorry when we meet him in the hospital and he even wanted to help us again , he finally felt like he can hold it and be useful, he said this himself. Be there for us in person!..but yet. It happened again. And this time with someone who he was always finding excuses and ways to help for. In chapter 2 he acts selfish and fishy, but you can see how he starts to care for NabNab, seems like his human senses come back to him more with each chapter, and it breaks my heart to just leave him in this room with dead NabNab alone with his did, I hope there’s a way to help him out, and I can tell that this is a good character writing, maybe Im not a professional. But with all of this I said just now, he does seem more attractive as a personality, doesn’t he?

It reminds me of Stinger Flynn’s dream sequence in chapter 4, surely the ending was..crazy and out of place , but what happened before it made me chuckle and wonder about the other characters too, it’s kinda cute and very natural of BanBan to say lIm not good with this stuff” when Stinger Flynn needed comfort with his.. endless sorrow. His “not again” really made me chuckle, relatable man…

Stinger Flynn

Despite being the most deep sounding and biggest in all meanings character of the game, his goals are very simple, to be a normal jellyfish and aimlessly swim in the real sea. I could understand his exhaustion with all the knowledge he somehow got, and it seems like he struggles to control the most unpleasant emotions there can be, anger and sorrow. No wonder he wants a life where those can’t exist at all! Did you know that Jellyfish is like the simplest organism there is? Peck they can live forever but they have no brains, that’s the life you would definitely want as a huge mega mind depressed jellyfish. He is aggressive often , but he seems to keep us alive for some purpose, from that many encounters he didn’t even once actually hurt us, but instead we had a glance at his beginnings with every dream sequence he gave us, maybe there’s something he tried to tell us? In his dreams we also can have a better look at other characters, know them better and see them actually interact, they are chaotic but I must say that the dream from chapter 4 is really good at giving us insight on him and BanBan, even NabNab(rest in peace lil bud) as NabNab actually shows us a kind gestire, which could be a hint at the fact that NabNab actually has potential in being “fixed”. I hope he’s alive and there’s still a chance….

Bittergiggle , sheriff Toadster and the Queen

Well well well, I can say that chapter 4 had the best character showcase in comparison to all the previous chapters. Bittergiggle is simple in his nature, yet he just clicks with those two. All three are playing their roles, they are the caricatures given life and their purpose is their life. Toadster protects his Queen and the Queen rules her kingdom of one, something they were made or believe they were made to do , but Bittergiggle wasn’t satisfied in his need, as he couldn’t make the Queen laugh, something he was made to do. When there were humans around, maybe he was satisfied but now there’s none, and without making someone laugh he didn’t feel like he’s living, he wasn’t doing what he was made to do, then what is the point? He said himself that he desperately tried to prove himself that there’s things more important then laughter( said it himself) but the existential crisis couldn’t make him keep his mouth shut for long, it’s unfair that everyone get to play their roles but he can’t, and it’s a good motivation, maybe one we won’t understand fully, but it makes him am reasonable villain of our story and when he finally gets what he wanted, oh did it hit hard. The chase sequence after the escape of “naughty ones” was not living up to the build up, but I’m surely invested in what will happen in the next chapter

And I feel very bad for lil beak, hope we’ll get to meet our kiddo some time soon…

Also some additional stuff I like, BanBan hides his horns under the party hats, maybe when they go off he automatically gets into his satanic side? I’m really curious on how Stinger Flynn managed to make him evil for that moment and how he turns back, but maybe that will always be left out of scene, still, that’s a cool ahh detail for the little amount of details that they have!

Other characters are simpler in their nature, but I must say that Snail, Banbaleena, NabNab and Sheriff are good to, I can’t really do the analysis here as this essay is huge already, sorry:’)

———————-

CONCLUSION

All in all, Garten of BanBan is not for everyone, but it surely doesn’t deserve to be called the worst mascot horror. If you take a look at the game from the inside and not from the perspective of those who keep listening to how shit the game is, you really can find it very much entertaining and interesting if you throw all this rumble away!

I don’t make you go and buy the game or praise it, it has it’s flaws and I’m a bit disappointed in Dev’s complaints about people refunding the game , people should do with their money whatever they want. But I hope the devs learned from backlash and won’t do this again:’D

———————-

The game is becoming better and better with each chapter, Devs are good at choosing on what to improve and it’s respectable, I wish them to keep doing what they’re doing and please restock the Plushies or make new ones Im 😭😭😭😭😭 for them. Thank you for the game too<:3

And thank you for reading this! Hope my rumbling gave you an interesting perspective, I’m terrible at essays and is often flying in the clouds and getting sidetracked, but I really wanted to share my thoughts and put them out in this world,,, Get well BanBan, I’ll be waiting for the next chapters and putting them all on my shelf so they’ll look pretty 💗

[ocpdramblings]

Maybe I should start using this blog to talk about my hobbies as well so that I can associate it with things I like. I like art, I do a variety of mediums. Watercolor, charcoal, graphite, trying to get into pastels and gouache, digital, not a fan of acrylic but I can do it, really want to try oil painting but I don’t have the space for it to dry.

I like reading classics a lot. Pride and prejudice is a fave rn and I impulse purchased Jane Austen’s entire works. Read the predecessor to Dracula, Carmilla. Very good. Very gay. Way more gay than I thought it was going to be. I thought it was going to be subtext. It was not. I also like reading trashy books as well. I really enjoy the ones that TikTok recommends that have absolutely insane plot premises. I don’t care about the writing at that point I just need to read.

I’ve recently gotten into Overwatch. Never played a FPS before. Made a couple new friends from it. Minecraft, Stardew Valley, Hollow Knight, I really wanna get into Celeste. On the second Ace Attorney game, I love mobile and gacha games, I wanna play more otomes even tho I’m not a big fan of romance when I am implicated.

I unmask a lot with this blog and every time I reread a post I can’t help but think of how bland it is and how I’d never talk like that in real life.

My favorite game is Okami. Never met other people who like it. Very sad.

I watch anime, tho I do this thing where I’ll watch a popular anime a couple years after it comes out. And I tell myself that it’s to see if it lives up to the hype but honestly it’s bc I’ll have random moments in which I want to watch anime and then the only ones that come to mind are popular ones on social media years ago. I say my favorite is Bungou Stray Dogs but that’s actually my favorite manga not my favorite anime. My fav anime rn is probably High Card. Doesn’t have the highest budget but I like the premise so far and the characters. My favorite mangas are Bungou Stray Dogs, Kuroshitsuji, and Witch Hat Atelier (also not caught up on). I wanna start reading firefly wedding.

I read a lot of romance manhwas, mainly with female leads but I have a couple with male leads that I adore. I haven’t watched any tv shows in a while but I’ve been telling myself that I’m either going to watch Hannibal or Dexter. I’ve been wanting to consume more queer material involving women since I’ve found that despite being sapphic, very few women media shows up recommended to me. Favorite movie of last year was Bottoms. I watched it several times. I want to get into cdramas. The next film I see will either be The Handmaiden or Maja Ma. Or one of the Saw movies. Been on a Saw movie binge with friends. I find the themes inconsistent. An unforgivable crime.

There’s no actors I’m particularly into. Never got into anything Marvel aside from Spider Man. I plan on reading the comics soon bc a friend of mine really likes Spider man and I want him to know I care about his interests.

I’ve found a new enjoyment for figure skating. I have a couple of male skaters that I quite enjoy, but I’d like to watch more and eventually get into some female and ice dancing pairs as well.

I crochet. Valentine’s Day is my favorite holiday. I graduate with my bachelors in the spring. I plan on doing my masters in IO psychology. My favorite color is blue and pink. I’ve been dying my hair for I think two years now. Maybe six months away from two. My friends say that I am surprisingly progressive in regards to my political views. I don’t know what that is supposed to mean.

I have a new car cause I recently got into a car crash. I’m very privileged. I don’t have to worry about money. I do regardless. I somehow have this personality disorder, and I have had one of the best life’s a child could have. Though every time I say that my friends say that’s weird considering the amount of trauma I’ve gone through. I think I have turned out well despite my circumstances. I like caring about other people. I’d like to make it my life’s goal to improve the life of somebody I don’t know yet.

Feel free to reach out to this blog anytime. It’s a side blog so I’m likely not gonna end up following anybody but I like talking.

[cartoonfan101]

Okay look.

I’m a big fan of both Amphibia and Owl House, and both are pretty great shows, but for someone to say “Amphibia is better than Owl House” just feels wrong to me. And I’m not saying you can’t like Amphibia more, because that’s valid, but there is just no way it’s better I’m general.

Owl House has done so much in the representation department for not only the lgbtq+ community but also poc, people with different body types, etc. But Amphibia on the other hand, only (at the moment) has three main human characters, who yes 2/3 of them are poc, but they’re all literal stick figures. Luz has a realistic body type, while Anne looks like she hasn’t eaten in years. I understand people look like that but for all three of those characters to be skinny is just… eh. I understand it’s the art style, but in the trailer for season 3 they showed people with different body types so I don’t understand why they didn’t do that from the beginning.

And while both shows do this pretty well, I can’t help but favor the way owl house covers actual human behavior (idk how else to describe it sos) more than Amphibia. Like in the beginning of Amphibia I was hooked on Anne struggling to understand the true meaning of friendship, but I kinda forgot about it as the series went on. What I love about owl house is they give characters redemption, but don’t always say you’re forgiven. Like in understanding Willow after Amity apologized Willow says something along the lines of “I can’t say we’re friends, but it’s a start” and Willow and Amity haven’t had many moments of extreme friendship since then. Like their friendship didn’t pick right back where it left off. Sasha is an interesting character though, because of her “I know what I’m doing isn’t right in Anne and/or Marcy’s eyes, but I like what I’m doing” which is something I wish they dove into a little more. How this is a point you may be wondering, is while both shows do it well, the owl house is more constant with it, and shows it with more than just the main characters.

The main characters in both shows can’t compare I’m sorry. Luz is not only great representation, but she’s a take on the “quirky” stereotype that makes her more than just that. She also does so much to help the people she likes, and even manages to make her way into people hearts (😏). I also find her very relatable and funny but that’s me. It just makes sense to me why the show is centered around Luz… but Anne. Anne is an okay character, I just wish she wasn’t the main one. I’ll admit she’s done a bit, but compared to Marcy and Sasha, her trauma is kinda just witnessing everyone else get hurt. Yes, that’s an awful thing, but I would much rather see Marcy or Sasha as the main character. I will admit, Anne not being the classic Disney channel cartoon quirky female main character is nice, I can’t help but feel she’s a bit… basic? This point is a bit more opinionated so I apologize for that.

The fillers is the biggest problem for me. Owl house did a great job making filler episodes that had to do will the plot or world building in someway, and with an exception of a couple episodes in season 1, people usually find all of the episodes entertaining in some way. Amphibia season 1 makes me want to jump out the window. There’s only two episodes I actually like watching in that season, and wow it’s the ones with Sasha in them! Season 2 is a bit better, but honestly I only like the filler episodes with Marcy in them. While I understand it’s a “kids show”, when you have another kids show on the same channel, playing at the same time period, who can manage to bring an adult audience who enjoys the filler episodes, I don’t see how you can use that as an excuse. Someone also pointed out the fact that Amphibia is more of a slow burn, which makes sense, but they could have executed it in a better way that was more compelling to the audience. I’ve seen too many people stop watching Amphibia because of the filler episodes, and people shouldn’t have to skip over content because it’s boring, you know?

I also feel more of an attachment to all of the characters in owl house. Like I either love them, or I love to hate them, no matter who they are. Like it’s been a year since we got any real Skara scenes, and I still love her… but in Amphibia I could care less about most of the frogs. Like I don’t even remember most of their names- I feel like having a cast of characters that people can love and appreciate, no matter who they are, contributes to a great show. Not only do I talk about this a little bit, but the fandoms honestly show this as well. The owl house fandom has done so much to make the Hexside students seem like a bigger deal than they are because they actually like them. In Amphibia, you can find one or two posts about a certain character, and never hear about them again OR the character is all you hear about.

Tbh tho, both shows are extremely similar, and I see why it’s hard to choose one over the other, I just have to be honest and say I don’t understand why Amphibia is better. I know most of my arguments were based on opinion, but like, a lot of people agree with my opinion (except the Anne thing. I’ll forever be alone on that). If you like Amphibia more, than good for you, I won’t judge. This is just how I feel about it and I would love to hear your opinion.

But while we’re here I will be talking about the utter bs Disney is showing to the two shows. Like Amphibia is getting ANOTHER theme song take over, a Christmas special, celebrity voice actors, and not to mention a full season three…

While the owl house is stuck with shortening it’s third season cause “budget cuts”. Bitch please. If you were losing so much money, then why not take some of your money away from Amphibia’s theme song take over and put it towards a full season three for toh. They both get the same amount of attention, but just because one is pushing boundaries for violence rather than the lgbtq community, doesn’t mean you can pick favorites.

Anyways feel free to argue with me 😌

(Edit: I quickly went back and edited some of the arguments so theyre a little less opinionated, which I’ll probably do again lmao)

[epiclevelup]

2021 Reflection + 2022 Goals

While I started this blog in 2021 (or was it 2020?) I haven't been active on it, nor have I made much progress in my level up journey.

Still, in this post I'd like to reflect on the steps I did make, and what I'm planning for this new year.

Starting with the outside:

Hair

More expensive products ARE worth it and yes, that includes shampoos

Conditioner is key, lots and lots of it

Also, leaving in a nice 100% natural oil for a few hours (or overnight) before washing will really help with shine and softness

Protective hairstyles for sleeping help, but are not quite enough for me. I'll be trying silk bonnets and pillowcases this year to see if that helps more.

Skin

Consistency is the most important element in your skincare regime

The Ordinary Niacinamide + Zinc serum might be the second most important

A nice, gentle cleanser is also essential. CeraVe hydrating one is my personal favorite at the moment.

Top this all off with a nice moisturizer and an occasional BHA or AHA mask, and you are all set up for great skin.

Body

Naturally, I have a pretty good shape. I learned to appreciate it more.

Body hair removal is still driving me crazy. I learned to accept not being perfectly hairless a bit more as well.

Neutral colours are great. Light, muted colours look best on me.

Style

Clothes should always fit your body NOW. Also, buy it only if you think it makes you look great, not if the garment itself looks great.

Finding your personal style is hard. Pinterest can help. Money is always an obstacle tho.

I really need something to iron my clothes.

Study

I cannot study in my room, and it's difficult to study around people I know. Hence the library would be best.

I can study well and long, and I do enjoy studying while I'm at it. Getting myself to start is the hardest part.

It always takes more time than I think. Always.

I still have no idea what I want to study, and what I find interesting.

Work

Sales roles are not for me. Nor roles where I have to communicate a lot.

Finding internships is really hard. More self-initiative could help.

Other

Just because you want something, it doesn't mean it's necessarily good for you to get it. Learning to let go and set boundaries would help.

I don't know myself as well as I always assumed. A lot more introspection is needed.

My insecurity in regards to the way I look, made me really bitter and jealous this year, especially towards pretty women. I am all for supporting and raising other women up, so this is something that I really need to work on .

Better time management. I need this.

Also, learning to budget. Starting to invest. Learning about taxes, money, finance and economics is a must.

Relationships are really hard. Being vulnerable is very exposing. Confort kills.

Now, that said, I want to work on my 2022 goals. Normally, I focus on setting a few, more general goals. I find that this makes it hard to track progress and determine if I succeeded or not. Therefore this year I want to set a lot of smaller goals, bucket list style.

My 2022 Goals:

Visit Budapest

Visit Vienna

Get into a nice Master programme

Re-learn to wake up early. 7 the latest

Work out at least 4 times a week

Take the economics course on MasterClass

Finish Behave (the book) and the YT lectures

Make a portrait

Read a book in French

Read a poetry book

Read Richard II

Have an internship

Save at least 300 euros (25 euros a month) and set up a savings account

Take an investment course

Learn about taxes in Europe (in the countries I'm considering to live in)

Finish the Google online course

Refresh and advance my Python course

Become good with R studio

Write 5 poetries

Eat healthier and plan my meals

Figure out a way to have my hair always look on point

Go to a theater play

Read 12+ books (at least one every month)

Start and finish a project

Get a magazine/newspaper membership

Improve my public speaking

Improve my posture

Learn more about etiquette

Learn to cook a fancy meal (4-course: starters, first course, second course, dessert)

Get one elegant, durable and high quality bag.

Keep my shoes clean and nice looking.

Fix my coats.

Learn more about contemporary art and artists, and interior design.

[selfcareparker]

LMAOO I WAS GONNA BRING UP FALCON AND THE WINTER SOLIDER BUT I WASNT SURE IF YOU WERE WATCHING IT HSKAJ (are you liking it? i know it’s only the first episode but ya know, another one tomorrow night- well tomorrow night for me, and did you like wandavision?? i loved it!!)

oh my goodness i’m watching lion king while writing this and i haven’t seen it in a while and i am..... emotional. but anyway, i love that streaming services think that imma pay for them while they charge $50 a month. like yes of course i have that kind of money and i am going to give it to you to watch tv 🙄 that $50 is budgeted to sims thank you. (ALSO SIMS!!! i’ll get to that in a minute) now see if i don’t google levidia right this minute LMAOO, not that i’m gonna use it.. just for the research...

AND HDKSHS SEND THAT CHAOS WALKING LINK LMAO i saw it for the third time with a different one of my friends and she wasn’t the best one to see it with? she literally was on her fucking phone and i was like ok whatever her loss not mine, and idk if you’ve read the books or if you’ve seen it by now, but by the end of the whole movie, after they’ve confirmed THE THING throughout the whole movie she asked the dumbest question and i’m like diD YOU NOT WATCH THE MOVIE, and i guess she didn’t. so. this sounds so vague but i don’t wanna spoil the movie for you just in case lol.

THE STORY LMAOO, so A DIFFERENT FRIEND LOL, like my oldest bff, we had a day together and we wanted to go see chaos walking. and i honest to God thought that no one would be seeing this movie. like NO ONE. every day, i checked the theater seating and no one was there right? plus i really wanted us to have the theater to ourselves. so we sit in the wrong seats, the row in front of us, STILL THINKING WE’RE ALONE. and then these 3 older people came in AND IM ABOUT TO SCREAM FHSJSH AND IM LIKE “are we in your seats?” and they we were like uh yeah, AND IT WAS SO BAD LMAOO , we’re moving and everything would’ve been FINE but my friend’s reclined seat was going down so slow and as it’s going shes LITERALLY SAYING ALOUD “awkward awkward awkward” so she thinks forget it, lemme just get up. HER BAG GETS CAUGHT ON HER CHAIR AND HER FRIES AND THEY SPILL ALONG WITH HER HONEY MUSTARD 😭😭 ALL OVER THE FLOOR! so i’m trying not to laugh lmao but those aren’t even our seats and we just made a mess, so naturally, i get on the floor and start cleaning it up with my napkins (this is going for too long) AND MY FRIEND IS STILL SAYING “awkward awkward awkward awkward” and i’m really abt to crack up bECAUSE LIKE SHUT UP HAHAHA and we’re cleaning it and shit and the oldest lady is gonna say “yeah you’re not gonna make an old lady get on the floor, are you?” AND I WANTED TO LAUGH AND SCREAM AT THE SAME TIME BC DID WE ASK YOU TO, NO, so then i had to get the manager and she helped us clean it, we got new fries and everything was fine, it’s just a crazy story bc LITERALLY WE COULDVE AVOIDED IT AND EVERYTHING BUT THESE ELDERLY PEOPLE HAD TO COME AND SEE THIS MOVIE😭😭 at least the gentlemen was nice.. he helped us clean. but then his wife was like “i aM nOt siTTiNg tHeRe” and at first i thought she was a teenager bc of her stink attitude but her husband was nice. and it’s not like we weren’t cleaning it up, we were!!! like i was so apologetic- anyway.

about sims! do you play console or pc? wait,, you already told me you play pc bc your computer was broken, i’m glad you can play now though :’)) litetally when i read in the tags that you’re playing sims !!!! and are you hyped for bunk beds? i have cc so i’ve had them for a bit, but they were glitchy... but i’m so excited we have them now! i should really play sims today...

GURL IM SO PROUD OF YOU 🥺🥲 i know you aren’t fluent in everything and you aren’t a linguistic genius LMAO but it’s still soooo amazing :’) here i am reading the captions while ur just going hahah, yea i tried duolingo but.... i didn’t stick to it HDJSH talking to you though makes me so interested because you know all these languages, not even studying them like that, but you have this foundation and ahh it’s just super cool. LOL YOU DONT SOUND LAME HAJA IM TELLING YOU ITS SO SO COOL, i’m loving this lesson btw oh my goodness- HSKAJS YOU THOUGHT I WOULD ALREADY KNOW THAT??? HDYSJHS MY ONLY ENGLISH SPEAKING ASS??? HAHAHAHHAH i find that word (Rindfleischetikettie- i’m not gonna write the whole thing i’m sorry) very interesting... like... wow. did you have to google that or did you just know lmao

OKAH THE WATER THING HDKDJDKS UR GONNA TERRIFY ME HAHAH OH MY LORD- first of all CROATIA 😍😍 but thinking about it like that, I WOULD FREAK OUT TOO HAHSGSG i never go that deep into the water, or if i do i have my dad with me lol and i kind of hold onto him bc ive seen/heard too many things about people being dragged into the sea. but i loveee the water (i wanted to be a mermaid soooo bad ohmigosh)

I DONT UNDERSTAND HOW ONE CANNOT LIKE MUSIC ITS AWFUL !! lmao yeah i haven’t even listened to harry’s his first album, everyone says they love it more. I WAS GONNA SAY IMMA LISTEN TO ONLY ANGEL BUT THE WAY YOU DESCRIBE IT HUHAHAH also i have never listened to anything by mgk (i actually had to google who he was IM SORRY😔) i’m tempted to listen tho lol PLEASE JUSTIN BIEBER- I PROMISE IM NOT LAUGHING AT U IVE JUSY NEVER HAD SOMEONE SAY THAT B4!! like i don’t know many people who’ve liked him bUT NOW IM GONNA LISTEN & the cardboard cutout- okay. 😭😭😭

oh my goodness to see the vamps live 🤧 TO SEE ANYONE LIVE PLEASE JJDGSHAHGD and little mix is so good oh my goodness- i actually haven’t been to that many concerts.. i was at my first one, elsie fest (it’s like a broadway thing really) in uhhh october of 2019, yea i took my mom for her birthday bc she loves darren criss and i’m obsessed with glee lmao OH MY GOODNESS YOUVE BEEN TO SO MANY!!! and those are such great artists 😩😩

LMAO UR FINE, hamilton is a musical that lin manuel miranda wrote and i think generally made? i’m obsessed, but basically it was on broadway and then recorded and put on disney+ ... idk i guess it counts a film bc it’s like a movie really cuz it was recorded but in what 2018 or 2016? i don’t remembers the date that is on disney+ but it’s strange how i got into it, a lot of my friends were obsessed and i was like uhh why? and while researching it and watching it, trying to figure out why people love it... i fell in love with it LMAO but the music is FANTASTIC and lin is incredible😭 but yes yes yes i loveeeee high school musical!! my dad actually took my cousins to see it on ice or something (i absolutely forget lmao) but i don’t know how people don’t know hsm. it upsets me.

OKAY IM DOWN TO THE BOTTOM HAHAHA (it takes me so long to respond, now i’m on lion king 2 WHICH IS SO GOOD PLEASE FHHSSHHSHSH) i could respond in chunks but i kind of enjoy responding like this? it feels a bit like a letter but if this whole thing is overwhelming i’ll cut it up lol

+ yes that was me about your fic and sleep and everything lol but it was so good😭 i don’t understand how you write peter so well like you have this ability to capture his.. everything? i’m crine. all the time. over your fics. & i cannot describe my happiness for youuuu :’) i’m so happy you’re writing again 🥺🥰 the thing about how you only want to write the long peter fic but you don’t know how to continue... i feel that so so so hard, i don’t think i told you but ughh i was so blah bc of that feeling of having pent up inspiration for only one fucking thing and not being able to write it. it’s so frustrating 😭

not to add more to this but i need to vent a bit? the situation is definitely different bc with your major it obviously requires for you to ya know, know english lol, but uhm bc i’m homeschooled ive been cheating on all my work SHSHDHSJ like i google the answers but i’m still learning! it’s just..... i find it so unnecessary, like going for an audition no one is gonna say to me “i want you to chanel the knowledge within yourself of the centripetal force of the circle that is the table on this stage” like tf??? there’s literally no point. i’m gonna be getting into voice lessons again soon and i’m already doing dance, AND i’ll be doing this summer camp program (more hamilton lol) and thinking about school is only making me stress more, like i haven’t been able to rehearse dance at all this week bc of it...... so

hahaha reading your tags, lonely anon would still be accurate HAHAHHAHA // another add: yea i love ur current theme, i’ve gotten used to “seeing you” like this, but anything will look super pretty :)) ALSO HOW IS IT STILL SNOWING THERE, i swear it’s getting warmer and warmer by the day here 😭🤧

these long ass posts, my gosh🥲 lonely lovely anon <3

Omg yes it does feel like a letter sldkdj and then the few days of waiting also make more sense okay i love this ❣️💕❤️💓❤️💞🧡💜💘(wtf)sksjhz

Dear lovely anon,

ALSKSJVKD yes i‘m liking falcon and winter soldier dlkdh i haven‘t watched the second episode yet but i‘ll watch it tomorrow! but i didn‘t watch wandavision........ eidislskks i was going to but idk i wasn‘t that interested in it and watching series is already too much of a commitment (what can i say i‘m a Sagittarius—🤧 (no i’m joking i actually know NOTHING about starsigns)) didjj that i couldn‘t force myself to watch it, ALSO i hate (idk if this is an unpopular opinion) when every episode is like a whole hour. i‘m rewatching an old series today (it‘s german so i won‘t even get into it) and the episodes are 25 mins each and i‘ve already watched 8 episodes today ridlndjdjd,,, and i feel like if the episodes were an hour each i wouldn‘t have gotten past episode 2 today like idk.... even if series had the same length in total, i prefer when the individual episodes are shorter idk why tho tbh (so yeah i already wasn‘t 100% convinced about watching wandavision so i just couldn’t make myself watch a bunch of 1hour episodes— i‘ve heard that it‘s good tho- but i‘m not much of a series person so. Dldkk (have we talked about this already??? sorry i don‘t remember what i said lol and i couldn‘t find my own post anymore so dkdjsh) (WAIT I JUST CHECKED THE WANDAVISION EPIOSRDES ARENT EVEN THAT LONG??? Okay wait i might watch it now - did you like it? let me know if i should watch it— why did i think they were 60minutes???)

okay another confession i‘ve never watched the lion king????? i mean i watched it when i was a child but i was too young to actually pay attention to any kind of plot i just liked the songs lol sldkdj i‘ve been meaning to watch it for years tho 🦁 (idk it just felt appropriate to put a lion emoji lmoaoo)

OH MY GOD THE CHAIS WALKING/CINEMA STORY AHSJSKKS😭😭😭😭 NOOOOO (very fitting that there was so much chaos when you were watching a film that has chaos in the title loool) and the “awkward awkward awkward“ SAME SKSKSLSKDJ, that‘s literally me 24/7 ahajshshhshshsh. Like i was so skdjdjdkdllsldksnsnsnsb while i read what you sent me djslslsjdjdbdn why are old ladies always so grumpy btw 🥲🥲🥲 at least the man was nice tho! and wait did i read that right... you have fries (which, to me, are called chips dusuusldk) at your cinemas?? (Movie theatres sorry sksjsh) we just have popcorn and nachos and drinks i want chips too when i‘m watching a film what😭😭🥺🥺🥺🥺

Also i still haven’t watched it so thanks for not spoiling it!!! (idk when i’ll watch it i’m so bad with films and even worse with series💀💀💀- same with cherry. i literally forgot all about cherry, i was SO hyped when the trailer came out like i’ve never been so excited about a movie... and then it came out... and i still haven‘t watch it like what‘s wrong with me???? Dkdjdjdjdklsl i feel like i‘m not gonna watch it anytime soon tbh, but i wanna watch chaos walking i just have to find the time

Okay and @ your other friend who wasn‘t paying attention like why are you even watching the film then???? but ok (omg this sounds so mean i‘m sure she‘s very nice but in this situation just like❔❔❔)

SIMS ahhh, BUNK BEDS, ahhhh sdljdjdjdkdkdldksj i actually haven‘t played it since the update 🤧🤧 i made both of my sims (enisa (bestselling author already, thank you) and michael (aspiring doctor)) go to university and bro it takes so long 😭😭 and you can‘t do anything else if you want them to do well so literally the last three times i played sims i was just constantly clicking their homework and computerd to write their assignments (i play it in german so idk what its called on the sims) and do their presentations and do them all over again so that they get better or whatever for HOURS, but imma play again soon

also i‘m living my fanfiction life loool, so i made my two sims neighbours (on the same plot tho but i made two small separate houses lol, i still wanted to control both of them at the same time but i made sure they didn‘t interact before i wanted them to skdjdjdk). and first they both experimented and got some experience in the love department you know (all genders, cause i have to live my sexuality even in a pc game slskdjh— wait, i‘ve never lived my sexuality irl like i‘ve done NOTHING nothing with guys nothing with girls (🥲) but maybe that’s why i want to do it even more in the sims) and then they met at uni and realised like hey we‘re neighbours and now they‘re together (but michael accidentally had an alien baby with another woman (who was an alien which i was not aware of) cause i wasn‘t paying attention like i said woohoo not try for baby like michael why is your pull out game so weak tf LSHDDHDJDJSKKDKSKDKS okay but making out and flirting and doing all the fun stuff in the sims turns me on way more than it should PFAHAHHAHSH) so idk why i told you this but I’m creating that neighbour!au in the sims lmaoooo

i did not have to google Rindfleischetikettierungsüberwachungsübertragungsaufgabengesetz (just did it again😌 sisjshhs) but i might have mixed up the words überwachung und übertragung or i might have even forgotten a word skskks but in the end it doesn‘t matter (by linkin park- ok i‘m so sorry it‘s 2 am and i have a headache from having waveformers in my hair all day but i still wanted to reply to this now so sorry if i‘m not making any sense right nowbahahshah)

i wanted to be a mermaid too dldjdksksj like h2O and all those series convinced me i could be one like. i remember i‘d always go in the deep pool and attempt to swim like them in all the series with that wave motion i must have looked so crazy with my goggles as well dkdjsksöksj (i was like twelve but still)

so mgk has two sides one is hip hop/rap which is like ~~~~ idk he has good and bad songs, but his latest album is like punk pop snd I LOVE IT SO SO SO SO SO MUCH, so if you like punk pop I’d recommend his album tickets to my downfall (i don‘t blame yoj if you don‘t like it tho like about a year ago i would have HATED that type of music dkdkdkkd)🥴

Okay talking about music, there‘s this german rapper and he is... not a good person. he‘s literally a criminal and extremely sexist but to me he‘s still hot???????? he‘s even cute at times even tho he has tattoos everywhere and is like 6‘5 and is super aggressive but i see him and i‘m like 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 my heart beats only for you💘💘💘💘and he released a new song today and i watched the video and i‘m wondering wtf is wrong with me 😃 (he did look particularly cute cause he was high so idk he wasn’t really aggressive in this one) 😭 so i thought i‘d share that LMAO IDK

(not saying tattoos aren‘t cute btw i LOVE tattoos imma get some soon, but you know he looks like someone your grandma would be afraid of (and in his case rightfully so💀)

okay wait i‘m getting so tired it‘s 2 am i think i‘ll have to do the rest tomorrow but i wanted to do it now😭🥺🥺 see you tomorrow

it is now 3:42 am and i couldn‘t sleep so here we go again

girl you can laugh at me for liking justin tho skskks i wanna laugh at myself idk, like i said i really really really liked him a few years go, basically my life was at least 50% justin and then he went on a break for a while and released an album last year which i hated 🥴 but this album is wow. (Still weird to me because it‘s literally the definition of pop and i don‘t ever listen to pop?) and it‘s so weird because i used to know so much about justin and had so many friends who loved him as well and now it‘s like I’m listening to someone new? Don‘t get me wrong i never KNEW justin and i never will and i‘m aware of that shahsh but yeah i used to be soooo used to him and it‘s like reconnecting with an old friend and you realise you don‘t know that friend anymore- like you don‘t know them anymore at all. I mean justin is weird nowadays 😂😂😂 so pls laugh at me tbh dskksjsjsh

awww it‘s so wholesome that you gave your mom tickets to the concert 🥺🥺🥺🥺 i gave my mum tickets for pink like 2 years ago and she loved it so much and i was like 🥰🥰🥰 (i went with her) AND OMG GLEE ok so unfortunately i barely remember glee, but i used to watch it too!!!! And it‘s actually on my list of series i wanna watch (again) so youre making me want to watch it even more (but like i said i‘m bad with series so 😩😩😩 who knows when i‘ll rewatch it)

When all this pandemic shit is over (let‘s be hopeful <3333) then you need to go to as many concerts as possible!!!!! i‘ve been to SO MANY and it‘s literally one of the things in my life i‘m the most grateful for, concerts are some of the best experiences i‘ve ever had in my life especially the ones that are in smaller concert halls where you can feeeel the vibe and everyone‘s energy (and that sounds awful thinking about it mid-pandemic 😐) anyway—

Okay omg you‘re absolutely making me want to watch hamilton right now like omg i WANT TO WATCH IT NOW but it‘s 4 am sodndkdldl

what you said about my peter fics🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺like omg i love these emojis they literally just describe how i felt when reading what you said so, yes, 🥰🥺 + thank you :) it really means a lot <3

and no omg i totally get the studying thing. like last year before i graduated .. was that last year? yes wtf omg okaykdjdj, so the last three months before i had my final exams we were just in a lockdown and we didn‘t even have online classes. We had nothing except one teacher who left our group chat (😭) because she was mad at us (?) and one maths teacher who did an online ““lesson““ once a week. he‘d ask: so does anyone have questions. us: . Him: okay, bye then. So. Yeah dndldldj. But we had one online test and it was in german and like i read the book wee were supposed to read? but the questions on the test were all unanswerable (is that a word?) and i had to google everything (got an A tho 🤪 but only because i googled everything so i was so scared that i wouldn‘t be able to get a good result on the final exam because what if i‘d gotten used to just googling everything and i couldn‘t do it by myself anymore? anyway it was all fine in the end but yeah at times i couldn‘t even study because i had so much anxiety about studying and yeah- like this whole annoying cycle. but you said you‘re still studying———- okay wait 👁👄👁 i forgot what i was going to say??????????????????????????????????????????????????? Like wtf. Is wrong with me? And i‘m reading what you wrote again and i just don‘t know what i was going to say? Like i get what you‘re saying obviously but i‘m like? Idk 4am brain ayeee, please vent more if you need to and elaborate further because right now i‘m???? Too dumb to respond to this right now wtf. I‘m so sorry lmao ddlkdjdjd what is even going on like i‘m sitting here open mouthed just like ? But btw the fact that you have Voice and dance lessons is like SO FUCKING COOL like oh my god that is sosososos cool wtf, i was thinking that when you first talked about it too

And “i want you to chanel the knowledge within yourself of the centripetal force of the circle that is the table on this stage” ODHDKSLDBDJDOFIDKDNDLDK

Yes i know about the weather dkdkdkjd but it‘s getting (a lot) warmer here too and where i live we kind of get a weird type of wind called föhn (which literally means hair dryer but idk if that‘d the reason why it‘s called that, i‘m too tired to think of whether it makes sense rn) and it gives me headachesssssss and the changing weather is also giving me headaches 😭😭😭😭 so this season right now is just headache season and i hate summer so i wish it would just snow again lmao (okay it‘s getting so late that it‘s early already snd i can hear this bird chirping so fucking loud wtf i‘m also getting a headache 🤧🤧🤧) but at least i can do my new theme soon (i hope it‘ll look good🥺 and omg thank you for what you said about my current theme- i always feel like i‘m so bad with aesthetics, i obviously like my theme but i feel like every single person on tumblr has a theme that is prettier than mine so it was very nice to hear you say that you love it👉🏼👈🏼 (i‘m so used to it by now that i actually hate it lmao so it‘s getting yeeted soon and i‘m making megan thee stallion my pfp 🤪 (if the graphics and shit works out skdjdjdj)

[petty-revenge-stories]

How to mend a friend's family tension while simultaneously kicking him out of your apartment.

(TL;DR at the end)

When I was in first year university, I moved into a 3 bedroom apartment with a friend of mine. There was only two of us and we talked about picking up a third person to ease the bills but didn't actively search for one as we enjoyed the extra space, even though we were constantly on a shoe-string budget.

By the end of the first term, I was approached by another friend of mine, we'll call him 'Steve', asking if the 3rd bedroom was still available. He had a falling out with his family and wanted to get out of his parent's place. I ran the idea by my current room mate and he didn't mind as long as Steve wasn't a sloth.

Now, Steve didn't go to university. He wasn't the ambitious type. Just lived to get by. The first few months went by and all was well then the retail shop he was working at did a round of budget cuts and slashed his hours back. He started to get behind on his bills, gradually bought less groceries, started eating our food then a month or two after that he had lost his job because he started calling in sick to work to stay home and play video games and hang out with his girlfriend because he decided his 3-4 hour shifts weren't worth his time to leave the apartment.

My room mate and I sat Steve down and explained that he's behind on his share of the rent and utilities, and even tho he was a good friend of mine, he needs to find more work and start pulling his weight. He didn't take kindly to our advice. He told us we "didn't have to be dicks about it" and was just all around grouchy about the confrontation.

Instead of turning himself around, he doubled down on his apathy. More food was disappearing, he wasn't showering on the regular, hygiene started to take a turn and if that wasn't enough, Steve started asking us for money so he could cover his cell phone and other personal effects.

We sat Steve down again told him he has a month to find work or he needs to leave. Again, he got pissed, but channeled that anger into writing a resume and seemingly started a course correction. Within a few days he started slacking again. My room mate and I didn't want to have another round table discussion with Steve. We figured that even if he did find work, the minute he hits a bump in the road, he's just going to turn into a piece of shit all over again. I didn't really want to show him the door without giving him a chance, but my room mate gave me an ultimatum: either Steve leaves, or he's leaving. He didn't want the added stress of extra bills, coming home to a smelly apartment or finding more of his food missing. He had a point. I was sick of it too.

So the phone started to ring with people calling for interviews but Steve would pick and choose who he'd call back. He would apply to places then feel like the work he applied for is beneath him. So now he's wasting the time of potential employers. That was the last straw for me.

It was less than two weeks until the date we gave him to find work or get out and he decides he's going to go spend the weekend at his girlfriend's place. While he was gone I jumped onto his computer and he was using Outlook Express to send/receive emails and resumes to employers. I hit that trusty account preferences button and change his first and last name on his emails from Steve Jones (not his real name) to "Anal Rapist". Hit save and log off.

He comes home on Sunday and with just little more than a week, before he has to hit the bricks, and starts rapid firing resumes all over town. He never gets a single reply. Move out day approaches and swallowed his pride and called his parents and asked he if could move home. They make up and we help him with his belongings, but the day he was taking boxes out the door my room mate and I were at work or school. We come home to find a few things missing: a couple of plates, some towels, books, clothes. But, most frustrating of all my wrist watch was gone. I was pretty pissed off about that so I called him and said we have a few things missing and I'd like my wrist watch back. He said he didn't see it and doesn't have it. I knew he was lying but there wasn't much I could do about it. I wrote it off as a loss.

Now I can already see the comments filling with "You changed his name to Anal Rapist! You deserve it". This may be true, but remember, he wasn't aware that the name change even occurred. So he didn't take it out of revenge. It was taken out of pure malice, contempt and selfishness.

About a month or two goes by and I had completely forgot about the name change. Then out of the blue my cell phone rings. It's Steve: You son of a bitch. You changed my fucking name to Anal Rapist on my email account!

I burst out laughing. Like, couldn't talk, couldn't breath. Just flat out of belly laughing on the phone. He's screaming and yelling and I can't make out a work he's saying because I can't steadily hold the phone against my head; I was laughing so hard.

How did he find out? An employer calls him and asks him to come in for an interview. It consisted of the employer explaining to him that he thought someone may have been pranking Steve and just wanted to show him the email he had sent. No, he didn't offer him a job either. It was purely an FYI session.

This made me laugh even harder.

The last thing he said was, "Yeah, well, I did take your fucking watch! You won't be seeing that anytime soon!"

I said, "I know you did, man. Not because you're trying to get back at me. It's because you're a thief." *click*

No regrets.

TL;DR - I took a friend in after he had a falling out with his family. He stopped paying bills, quit his job and started stealing. I told him to find work or gtfo. He put no effort into job searching so I changed the name on his email account to anal rapist for all potential employers he contacted. He made up with his parents and moved out. He discovered the name change much later. He confessed to stealing from me and I laughed whole-heartedly in his face.

(source) (story by bloodbathnbeyond)

[amalasdraws]

seriously tho,, ur art is— i have no words,, i wish i could draw like that but i am broke so the only thing at my disposal is a pencil and a sheet of paper

Ahh thank you!!I’m glad you like it!!

Ah tbh a pencil and a sheet of paper is all you need to draw!!Yes, true, I draw digitally, and if you want to draw like this, digitally, a pencil and a sheet of paper isn’t enough.But you can dooo so much which a pencil and a sheet of paper! This is what I did for the longest time! Before I had my tablet I drew traditional. On cheap copying paper with a pencil. And it helped me so much to get where I am.There are also some freeware art programs. Such as Firealpaca (which I use) or medibang. You can just download them for free. And to get a first idea of how the program works and to figure things out you can draw with your mouse. I did this first too and many other artists too.

I totally get the feeling of being broke and I know that when being broke even 40$ are A LOT of money and it doesn’t help when people say ohh it’s only 40, get it!But maybe if you like the free digital programs and enjoyed drawing with a mouse and want to do more you could maybe save up for a small tablet over time. You don’t need to have a touch tablet (like a cintiq) or ipad or anything to draw! Get a small old intuos. New they can be 80-100 (which is a lot yes)…other brands than wacom maybe even cheaper. And you might find good deals of used and cheaper tablets even.I bought one tablet, 4 years ago. A small wacom intuos, cause I was lucky and had a job and could put some money aside. I still draw on this one. With a free program I downloaded.

Art supplies don’t have to be expensive. And you can do a lot with a small budget.I know those ipads and procreate videos on IG look fancy, or the videos with nice watercolors. But you don’t need this! Its nice. But you don’t need it!And you can do so much and learn so much by just using what you have! And go for it!Don’t let being broke stop you from drawing!Use this pencil up until it’s gone! Doodle on every corner of that sheet. Use recipes, use old notebooks, use old books, steal a pen from your local bank ( you know those ones that they have for you to sign things), buy a pack of cheap bic pens at the 99cents store, and just draw!

[praphit]

Captain Marvel: I dream of Breezy

People, the time has come!

Ever since we saw Nick Fury sending out a message at the end of "Infinity War", we've been waiting... which in the moment seemed out of place. The world is literally disappearing before our eyes, The Avengers took a big L, and Nick Fury decides to... what? pull out some high-tech weapon to save the day? - no. Pull out some type of device that will save himself from disappearing? - no. But, he's got time to take a selfie or tell his women "bye" - or so I thought. He was actually sending a message to the mysterious (at the time) Captain Marvel!

BOOM!

Brie Larson, who plays CM, was always hanging out at Marvel events, and we finally figured out why. It was strange at some of these events tho... like the Black Panther Party - all of these people from Wakanda -

- and then there's Brie Larson.

And they're like "What the hell, woman?! Why are you here?!"

But, now we KNOW! - she's Captain Marvel!

SPLADOW

- and she's going to play a huge role in saving the day. Then, we found out that she's getting her own movie, and it's about damned time it has arrived.

I had a dream about Brie the night before this movie's release. She was sitting on the couch, and was upset about something. She also had... well, maybe she was pregnant... or she had a beer gut. But, in this dream, I remember feeling a deep love for Brie, so even if it was a beer gut, it didn't matter to me. It would also mean tht she's passionate about beer, which I am as well:)

I don't know if we were a couple, or if she was the other woman, or if I was the other man... or if I was trapped in the friend zone, and thought I'd use this time of her being upset to break free and into her arms... Who knows?? I also don't know what she was upset about. But, towards the end of the dream, I was on the couch with her, giving her a hug:) - she let me, so I know she wasn't upset at me. I woke up and shouted "Brie!" And within seconds, I realized it was all a dream... or was it? Maybe she's my wife in another dimension. We'll solve that mystery later, it felt real as hell tho.

Anyway! We have Brie as Capt M. We also have a digitally young Sam L Jackson!

Before the brooding, the scars, the all black uniform, the badass eye patch, and him demanding to know what's in my wallet, he was a young pup of a detective, who loves cats apparently. I was excited to see more of his story.

Jude Law is also in this movie. He's rockin that look when you're losing your hair, but you jell it up a bit to look like you're still young and hip. Some people can pull off the look, but it's always the beginning of mid-life crisis. Whenever I see people walking down the street with that look, I always tell them that I'm praying for them.

When was Jude's last big movie? I ask because Jude is supposed to be a big star right?? - or at least he was. Yet I never see him at any Marvel parties. Is he not invited? Why don't they like Jude? "Jude" is such a cool name. I'd want him at the party, so I could say things like "You know JUUUDE'S going to be here." and "Excuse me, but I need to go speak with JUUUDE." Why don't they want him there? Is it because of his mid-life crisis? I have a feeling that when rich, famous, white men go through their mid-life crisis that it's ten times worse than other non-those things people. Anyway, yet another mystery to solve.

Djimon Hounsou is up in there as well - I feel like he never gets enough credit for being in everything. And Ben Mendelsohn, who's frickin awesome as a villainous character.

We've got a great cast, some kick ass special effects (which btw they put their budget to good use - the bg's and fight scenes were dope), AND we got the 90's going on! We saw from the trailer that Capt Marvel smash-lands through the roof of a BlockBuster Video store. Memories, am I right?? Some of you are prob too young to remember the pain of renting a DVD season. I remember trying to rent epi's 3 & 4 or something, but they might only have 1 & 2 and 5-10. I'd have to search around at other BlockBuster's (especially if I promised a lovely lady on a date that we'd watch a certain episode when we got home) or say "eff it!" and watch it out of order. I used flirt with the clerks to ensure they'd lmk when the epi's I needed were in. Turnin BlockBuster tricks for episodes... the 90's were rough. The movie takes you down a fun lane of memories, if you remember those days tho.

In the midst of nostalgia Capt Marvel is snatched away from her successful life as a pilot, taken to space where she is made into the Capt Marvel that we come to know, finds herself back to earth to hang out with Sam L while piecing together the memories of her past, all while a war is going on with a shape-shifting alien race called "Skrulls"

 - they kinda look like Yoda's people.

Ooo! maybe tht's another mystery! It would fit too, because a lot of this movie feels like Star Wars - like Star Wars meets a 90's buddy cop sitcom.

I enjoyed the movie. I had a fun time with it. There are some compaints out there: Some wanted this movie to be deeper in story. Some wanted this movie to be more soaked in serious feminism. Some wanted this movie to be less soaked in general feminism. Some were bothered by Brie Larson, believing that she's too stoic in her delivery.

Um... I don't understand the complaints about feminism (on either side). If you are looking for the feminism, it's def there. BUT, if you simply want to enjoy a movie without too much serious world stuff in it, that's def there too. You'll see or not see whatever you want, I guess. I would compare this movie more to "Ant-Man" in tone. Not as goofy, but it stays fun and light.

Now, it definitely could have been a deeper movie - CM is kidnapped, violated, and lied to - but Marvel ain't dumb - they don't want THAT to be the kid's first impression of her - that might effect sales. Besides, we don't always have to be so serious and tense all of the time.

Ex. In Ant-Man, he always goes big at some point and ends up crushing people's property, and probably crushing people around him as well - we don't talk about that. And what about his manipulation of those ants?! When you think about it, that shit ain't right! But, we don't need to talk about it:)

And I'm of course going to defend my wife from another dimension (Breezy). A lot of her personality is implied from the flashbacks, but we see she's snarky, fun, and a bit of a loose canon. I understand to a degree what people are saying, but I think the blame goes more to the writers than Brie. Also, the fact that there's non-stop war going on throughout the movie, so there's not a whole lot of down time to get to know her in depth.

The writing to me, is the biggest flaw of this movie: The villainous character that Ben Mendelsohn plays brilliantly is inconsistent. In the beginning of the movie, he's no-nonsense "We need to kill her and anyone who gets in our way". Then, later on, it's like he joins in the 90's buddy cop sitcom fun. He's crackin jokes and talkin shit - which btw (and I admit this is a nitpick) how does he know how to use slang and idioms, if he'd never been to the planet before? I also have other questions about shape-shifting - like... they can change into whomever they see, but... how do they get the details right? - or do they? Let's say somebody has a third nipple and a bad case of athlete's foot... how could they get those deets down? or even the voice - how do they copy your insides? And how do they copy your mind enough to fool people? I'm getting way too deep into this, I suppose... more mysteries smh.

Can you imagine if we all had the ability to copy one another?? Which takes identity theft to a ho nova level. Also sexual harassment... I mean let's say you wanted to feel what Chris Hemsworth's butt felt like.... you kinda could whenever you wanted to. Like I said, we don't need to go deep with everything:)

The writing is also too quick; the whole movie is - we don't get to know much more about Fury or any of the characters really - especially CM. At the end of the movie, I found myself not being invested enough in Capt to care if a sequel is made. I mean, I care if my wife from another dimension gets more of that Marvel money, but that's something different. There's also a part in the movie when she realizes she has been lied to... she gets over this very quickly. Most of us with that type of power would have went on a drunken rampage, but she just throws a slight tizzy, and moves on to kick butt. It would have been a great time to show some human traits that would have helped us relate to this character.

I also fear that they might run into the prob they run into with Superman. Supe is sooooo powerful and he doesn't have many flaws. It's flaws that draw us to characters as much as anything. We didn't get enough of the human side of CM. BUT, all in all (like I said), I enjoyed the film. But, I didn't have any expectations going in. I think if you go in like that, you'll be satisfied.

Grade: B

I wonder if Brie had a dream about me as well. I wonder if she's blogging about some lovable, praphitic... and sexy black man whom she feels like she had a loving life with, but then woke up. She's probably telling someone right now "I was preggo with his beer child (idk what that is, but it's another dimension - diff rules) and he was about to comfort cuz I was upset over stubbing my toe." That's prob all it was right?? I guess we'll never know:)

[bruhwhyth0]

WHY THO?

Jesus Christ I was really hoping I’d never have to do this again. I honestly don’t know what is worse, having to watch another shitty movie or rereading my old blog posts and realizing that they were lower in quality than the movies I was reviewing. Fortunately it doesn’t really matter because I know for a fact that my -2 followers don’t seem to mind. But here I am. Once again I must swallow my pride and sumit myself to literal torture all in the name of a grade. To my suprise choosing a crappy movie was almost as difficult as watching one. So many options. So much low hanging fruit. However movies of this nature can always be a mixed bag. I remember when I first started this blog a few years ago some reviews never left my drafts because I didn't have much to write about. Sometimes a movie is so mediocre, so bad, that it can’t even excel at being an awful pile of crap. I chose to write about bad movies because I figured it would be entertaining. You’d think some films, in their own demented way, could at least entertain. But no. Can’t even get that right. I’d find myself at 2’o’clock in the morning looking at my notes only to realize that I basically wrote nothing. All I had was a lingering sense of regret and confusion; like I’d just woken up from a drunken one night stand. All I could do is ask myself, “What the hell did I just watch?” So as I revisit this deserted island I call my blog for what most likely will be the last time, I want to make sure that it is worth it. If I’m going to verbally assault a movie, I’m going to make sure it is an easy target. That was my thought process at least. I soon realized that just because a movie is easy to write about, that doesn’t mean it is easy to watch.

So what movie did I force upon my soul do you ask? Why CATS of course. Because who doesn’t like Cats? Everyone loves cats. What’s not to love about an ungrateful and rude animal that walks around your house like it owns the place. An animal that bites, scratches, and claws at anything it deems unworthy. “Let's make a movie, based off the perverted 80s Broadway production that centered around these literal spawns of Satan,” said every Hollywood executive with their head up their ass. As a matter of fact they thought it was such a good idea that they dropped 95 million U.S. dollars on it.

Now before I continue, as I typed “cats budget” in my google search bar, take a guess what came up after “cats bu..”. CATS BUTTHOLE SMELL. Are you fucking kidding me? What the hell is wrong with people? I tried recreating it in the search bar to screenshot but I couldn’t get it to come up, but trust me. I know what I saw. What is it with cat people man? Seriously. Really threw me off my train of thought.

But yeah, 95 big ones. A lot of good things could have been done with that money, but nope. We needed a live action adaptation of Cats. Did anyone who thought this was a good idea even see the play? That shit was weird. I didn’t watch it, cause, well why the hell would I?

But from the bare minimum research that I did do, the general consensus was that it was a shitty play that made lots of money because people are dumb and will watch anything. I guess producers were hoping lightning would strike twice. If you saw the play you would know that there is literally no plot. It has nothing. It is literally a bunch of weirdos dressed like anthropomorphic cats dry humping each other and singing for 2 hours. I swear its target audience had to consist of lonely 12 years old, sad housewives, and perverts. I tried watching the musical just to get a general reference of the living hell I was going to put myself in only to be utterly mortified. My eyes and ears didn’t last 5 minutes. How it made all the money it did baffles me. But I’m not here to talk about this crime against humanity, I’m here to rip into its bastard child. And boy, oh boy, is there a lot to talk about.

$14.99 in and I’m already regretting my life choices. Everything in my life has led me to this moment and I really wish I could change that. Thanks to what a box office bomb this movie was, I can’t rent it anywhere. I can only buy it. Figures. You're already off to a bad start movie. 2 minutes into the opening scene and I already hate it. People walking around on all fours in fursuits, licking their genitals, singing dancing, some crappy asymmetric musical. WHY! Oh god why did people make this? What kind of furry bullshit is this? I am going to be completely transparent. I’m writing this while I’m watching the movie. I’m not even 5 minutes in and I want to blow my brains out. This is not hyperbole, I wish it was. I can’t dude. I can’t watch this fucking movie. All the characters speak in these weird haikus with British accents. I can’t. I just can’t. I don’t know what anyone is saying half the freaking time. So many made up words and phrases. It's like the script was written by some Dr. Suess rejected. I genuinely have no idea what is going on. I was really hoping that for once one of my reviews wouldn’t sound like the rantings of a madman. But I can’t help it. This crap is rotting my brain. Seriously what is going on. Maybe I’m a simpleton who doesn’t get musicals, but I shit you not there is no plot. I have no idea what the hell is going on. How do you have a movie with no plot?

It’s just singing about being cats... and their FEET. JESUS CHRIST THEY HAVE FEET. No CGI paws. BARE. HUMAN. FEET. God why. How as an actor, do you go on set, act like a literal animal and tell yourself, “yeah this is gonna pan out great.” How did they sit down and go, “I’m going to sit here, lick a fake bowl of milk, sing and dance nonsense, then proceed to lick my non-existent cat balls.” I literally watched an actor snarl directly into the camera. When I went to find out who it was, I was unsurprised to see that all the pictures of the actors were gone. Just names. With a little digging I found out it was Ian Mckellen, you know, from Lord of the Rings. Magneto from Xmen. That Ian Mckellen. Yup, and he snarled to the camera like a cat. Anything for a paycheck right? Who am I to judge, I watched 2019’s Cats for an English class. Who is really losing here, cause frankly I don’t know anymore. If I have anything positive to say about this movie is that it has less dry humping than its source material. Key word less. I better get an A for this.

An hour into the movie and I still don’t know what the fuck is going on. Some dude in overalls is tap dancing. He's a “railway cat” cause he's a conductor or something. I physically cannot do this. I'm dying on the inside. A light inside me is slowly fading. Countless abhorrent musical numbers. Too many for a man to take. To put things in perspective, I did not like Hamilton. Did I respect it for what it was? Of course. Not my cup of tea though. Hamilton was a great musical, arguably one of the best, and I did not enjoy it whatsoever. Now here I am watching Cats. Just a little perspective.

As I came to the end of the movie I saw that I missed all kinds of things. There was a love plot, some kind of contest, and villain. But that didn’t concern me. All I could focus on was how I wasted an hour and a half of my life. 

An hour and a half wasted on this.

Do you think God left us because he feared what he created? I sure as hell do. The philosophers were right. Everyday Pantheism is making more and more sense. And if not that nihilism. God is dead. God is most certainly dead. Don’t believe me? The GIF above is all the proof you need.

I was hoping that for once one of these blogs would have some sense of conformity. Some sort of cohesion. Maybe an ounce of legitimacy. But I couldn’t. There is something about these movies that drain the life from you. Every second spent looking at my computer screen I felt brain cells dying. I might as well have drunk a whole 750 milliliter bottle of Everclear. That or bang my head against a wall for 15 minutes. Either would have been just as effective; and probably more efficient.

I thought that I could improve upon the quality of my blog. When I reread my old post I realized that they had no depth. I thought maybe it was me. Right? I was 15, What did I know about good writing? No. It never had anything to do with me. Movies like Cats are such horrendous abominations of human creation, that there is literally no way to talk about them with any form of professional effort. They are shallow. There is nothing to analyze. How can you analyze garbage? Art requires respect if it wants to be reviewed and judged accordingly. Cats and films like it don’t have my respect and never will. I type this with immense pleasure. Never again. Never will I ever put myself through this bull again. Thankfully, for the last time. I can ask Why Tho?

[silenceofthemongooses]

hi! I hope I'm not bothering you but I can see ur attending CU. I'm planning on applying to either the school of art or engineering, but I'm leaning more towards art. I'm really at a loss when it comes to applying, home tests,and the general enviorment of the school.. and what to do after I graduate so I was just curious on what that's all like :0 sorry for making this so long .. thank u for ur time!

OMG THIS IS THE ASK I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR MY WHOLE LIFE I LOVE TALKING ABOUT COOPER

i’m putting it under a readmore bc it got crazy long??? i’m not even to the part where i yell about applications yet and it’s like ten paragraphs lmao

so. 

first things first. 

i applied to cooper in the first place because when i took the tour (best fucking college tour i took the whole time, by the way. all of the guides LOVE cooper and they love telling you about it, so if you get a chance, defo go on the tour bc theyre way more honest and you get a better feel for the school than on any other tour) one of the things that they emphasized was the student community., one told me that once when she walked into the EE lab and asked to borrow someone’s phone charger because hers had frayed so badly it wasn’t working. not only did someone give her a charger, but they fixed her charger until she could get a new one. 

and when i got here, it’s totally fucking true. cooper is a community in every definition of the word. everyone is totally willing to help you in any way that they can, because that’s the kind of people that cooper admits and then fosters that behavior. 

now. the reason they foster this behavior is because it’s a fucking hard school. the standard course load for a freshman engineer first semester is 18.5 credits, spread out over 7 classes plus a professional seminar. and yeah, some of those are only one or two credit classes, but they still have homework and class time. it is a rigorous schedule that only gets harder. professor alan wolf (physics, more on him later maybe? i have him next semester, we’ll see if the Rumors are true) said at an engineering faculty panel that he wants physics to be moved to first semester of freshman year (instead of second) because the transition from “an easy first semester” to a semester with physics and calc 2 was too difficult for a lot of students. everyone around me groaned when he said the first semester was easy. 

and this is just the engineering school! the art school is hard as hell too. keep in mind that what i know about the art program is just synthesized from talking to art students and not at all from personal experience. but. 

the first year of art is a foundation year. they assume you don’t know anything, and break you down to basics. the art ra in the dorms said her freshman year was incredibly hard for her both as an artist and as a person just because she was confronted with all these other talented people and having to face that she wasn’t The Artist in school anymore. i regularly leave the student lounge (menschel) at two in the morning only for art kids to walk in, holding all of their materials (although, not anymore, since someone got charcoal all over the tables in 3a lmao) and settling in for another all-nighter. 

cooper is a culture of intense rigor and stress, and there is no overcoming that. but it’s also a culture of community and supporting each other. it’s a really specific kind of school that some people find just isn’t for them. 

also, cooper is like, really small. like. very small. here are some of the things you will encounter because of cooper union’s limited budget and facilities, and which you basically have to accept:

no dining hall. there’s frankie’s cafe in the new academic building (also known as the engineering building, most commonly referred to as the nab) but otherwise there is absolutely no meal plan. frankie’s has like, sandwiches and muffins and bagels and (terrible) coffee, but it is in no way a full college dining hall. 

no gym. i think at one point we were allowed to use nyu’s facilities? no longer. almost everyone i know belongs to a gym. i myself visit the planet fitness on union square maaaybe once a month when i guilt myself into it. blink is a popular option. if you’re willing to spare the cash equinox is also there. crunch is the one that everyone kind of makes fun of but like it’s super close so go for it if you want. 

small supporting staff. this is both a blessing and a curse. i know everyone in the student affairs office by first name and usually they know me. i think at this point i’ve met everyone in the financial aid department. cool, because it means that they know me. bad, because it means i’ve had to talk to all of them to figure out what the hell is going on with my scholarships and how much money i actually know. this is not a school where there are online systems in place to fix any problems you have. you have to be your own advocate to the administration, and as much as they desperately want to help you, a lot of the time it comes down to just making sure your paperwork goes through. good news is you almost never have to make an appointment to talk to someone you just show up. 

very little interaction between the schools. there are three schools. art, architecture, and engineering. engineering is by far the most populated, followed by art, then architecture. if i didn’t live with two artists, i would never talk to anyone in art or architecture. yes, the hss classes are multidisciplinary, but just statistically, engineers far outweigh the artists. there weren’t even any architects in my hss1 class. if you don’t make the effort to reach out beyond your school, it straight up doesn’t happen. 

sometimes when you go to the basics plus to get some hangers because you ordered too many shirts online and now they’re just kind of shoved in your drawers and when the cashier asks if you have a student id and you pull out your cooper id she’s like “oh! is that local?” and you have to smile and say yes and when you walk out of the store you can see the foundation building down third with absolutely no problem

there’s more and i’ll think of them later but this is good for now

ANYWAYS i have a lot more thoughts on the culture of cooper??? but i think i’m going to leave it here because this is a decent overview of how i feel and what the most important parts are. 

now.

for applying.

again, i applied to and am in the engineering school. everything i know about the art school is based on talking to art students

also, i am in no way affiliated with the actual admissions department and the following is just based on my experiences as someone who applied and talking to other people who applied

also at first i thought you were applying this cycle and i was like. honey. this is not enough time for either application

BUT THEN i put an ounce more thought into it and realized not everyone younger than me is a high school senior lmao

anyways!

both applications are really intensive. to get art out of the way (sorry art) it’s a series of prompts that you have to create a piece in response to. some artists i know got crazy super stressed about it, and pulled so many all nighters, and skipped a lot of homework to do it, and overall just did not enjoy it. one of my artist roommates, however, said that she actually really enjoyed the process? she just let herself create without worrying “is this what will get me in?” and felt that it was a really great experience. 

either way, you’re going to have an interesting experience. 

for the engineering writing prompts, it’s a goddamn marathon. there were nine, i think, when i applied? i applied to eleven schools and i had to write seventeen supplements. the ratio of supplement-to-school was way off and its all cooper’s fault lmao

there isn’t a word minimum, but there is a word maximum per essay, a fact i discovered as i was copy-pasting mine into the commonapp from my googledocs file. i think the max is 500 words? not positive tho don’t quote me

anyways they’re all fairly standard questions. like, nothing out of the blue like chicago’s or whatever. but keep in mind that this is honestly where you’re going to get admitted. a lot of people apply to cooper. and a lot of those people will have the same exact stats as you (btw, sat/act scores and gpa matter slightly more for engineers than for artists and architects) and the way to distinguish yourself is through your writing. cooper admits you as a person because they believe you’ll add to their community and then to the world, not because you got a perfect score on whatever. 

so i, at least, let myself be a little freer in my cooper essays than in any other supplement. some of them i could answer right away (why cooper? why engineering?) and some of them i had to think about for a few days. the last one i wrote was the “tell us about something you read recently”. i wrote about staying up until three in the morning reading a novel and crying. i wrote it the next day because i realized that’s like, exactly who i am as a person. 

the biggest tip i have for writing these essays in general (not just for cooper) is to watch food network star or something similar. the contestants get prompted on how to hook an audience (hey, you want to do that too!) in a short amount of time (word count) and tell a story that relates to both them and their food (a story that relates to you and and why you’re going to be a bombass cooper student) like, just watch a few, and then you’ll kind of have the flow of it down, and you can figure out how to work it into your own writing

just like, really show who you are. i know it can be tempting to put on this facade, and to a certain extent you should (do not, for example, tell them about the time you got so drunk you pissed your pants) but do your best to express yourself, in either application. 

um anyways i am always down to talk about any aspect of The Cooper Union for the Advancement of Science and Art, so if you ever want any more info on anything, hit up my inbox!

my points of expertise include the dorms, classes, stanislav mintchev the greatest math professor in the history of the world, ray’s pizza, sitting in the engineering student council meetings and listening to all the Hot Goss, and more

i mighttttt end up putting up like “a week in my life” post at some point because i always think those are cool and maybe it would be neato

we’ll see

(if anyone want to see that…… or anything else……. lmk……..)

[kitto-toberu-sa]

Sailor Moon Musical - Le Mouvement Final

So on the 23rd of October I went to Aichi to see the Sailor Moon musical~ Our bus arrived at 6am, so we spent the day chilling and checking out the Pokemon Centre and the poor selection of Digimon items at Kiddyland…

From Nagoya, it took an hour and a half by train to get to the venue, Ai Plaza Toyohoshi. We were cutting it really close (missed a train), but managed to power walk there in time. Thankfully goods were being sold in the break and after the show.

Unfortunately, the venue was dead.

The first floor is S tickets (8000 yen), the top floor is A tickets (6000 yen?). A third of the first floor was occupied, with a smattering of seats in the top part.

I feel so bad for all the cast and crew. It must have been really awkward to be singing to a bunch of empty seats. I’m not sure how much this was promoted, but having the venue so far out of the city really didn’t help things.

Personally, I had wanted to go to see the show in Osaka, but thanks to Aichi not being sold out, we ended up having really amazing seats ;; We were ninth row from the stage and I was on an aisle seat. It was seat 29, and I was going fight my friend for seat 30 (lucky number lol) but I’m glad I didn’t.

The show itself is explanatory. It’s the finale of the manga.

The start with Mamoru half proposing was wonderful. You could feel the audience’s hearts getting excited for Usa. It was obviously much more condensed than the manga, which I was thankful for. It gave us time to jump straight into things; however, the cute dance between Mamo and Usa at the start was really nice!

Chibi-usa was gone from the start, instead of leaving part way through. Ami is the one to notice something is wrong with Usagi, rather than Minako. Iron Mouse isn’t killed straight up either. She’s able to go back to Galaxia, say she’ll do better next time and gets a reprieve after having her butt handed to her. We get a rift in the four Galaxy Sailors here.

(Honestly, Seiren and Crow can step on me any day of the god damn week)

Chibi Chibi is insanely adorable. I am honestly not a fan of small children, don’t want kids and always ??? at people when they try to coo and tell me how cute their munchkin is. But damn. This kid was cute. It didn’t feel fake sweet or like she was out of place.

I also really enjoyed the scene where the girls are trying to figure out whats up with the Lights. Minako mentions they might be chicks. Setsuna has chibi faces of them on a white board. “….then they’d wear mini skirts if they were scouts…” A fight ensures as she tries to fuku them up, while Minako and Makoto are mortified haha

Usagi being forced to remember what happened to Mamo happened straight after Mercury and Jupiter dying, so it was very raw. I don’t think Venus’ loss really had as much of an impact. Rei’s did. For me, at least. Rei’s always been my number one girl, but her last thing she said was ‘sorry we couldn’t protect you’. I think it says a lot about her character, especially when most other people just said ‘Usagi’.

Usagi has a dream where everyone is alive and Mamo’s a chef and it’s all just very pure and sweet and then she wakes up and everyone’s still dead  The scene in front of the door was sufficiently eerie. I think Usagi’s wavering and ChibiChibi’s innocence helped this scene a lot as well.

At one point after the interval, Galaxia is singing. She walks down the aisle, right next to me. HO DAMN! Even with those stupid coloured lips she’s amazing! Her performance was one of the best, even when she was speaking, her expressions and pose said it all.

Kakyuu’s death was touching. As was the Lights. The problem with this arc is that everyone dies. Done in a weekly anime or manga, it’s probably more emotional, but losing 10+ characters in under three hours makes it a little less so. In saying that, I cried a couple of times lmao It was nice that there weren’t as many Senshi tho. This isn’t Oprah folks.

The scene where everyone is resurrected was great. The song was powerful, the girls looked bad ass. Wonderful. 100/10. Chibi Chibi talking to Chibi Moon was also really good. And of course, when she transformed as well. Everything about her is just stunning. Her outfit was perfect, she was perfect, 100% would cry over again.

I also really like how it discusses all the past enemies. They put up images of all the old enemies, up to Galaxia, on a sheet that came down in front of the stage. It gave it a warped feeling, and kinda made it more space like. Unlike the manga, the musical goes more into detail about who Cosmos is. Same about the whole siblings thing.

The wedding scene was really cute. I’m not sure if it happened in all versions, but Minako said she’d definitely get married next. Of course, Rei is the one that catches the bouquet ;;

Once everything is finished, The End comes up on the screen. They also do a montage of the previous musicals from this run. A lot of the audience was emotional. I only saw last year’s and this year’s live, but it’s super nostalgic. Afterwards, they did the usual performance stuff, mixed with songs from previous musicals as well. Yuuga was both Tuxedo Mask and King Endymion. She teases the audience so well I can't deal with her.

There was a point Yuuga came down the aisle. Yes, right next to me. We made eye contact. I squealed and leaned into my friend after she passed. The crowd was losing it. At one point a dude behind me asked his SO ‘…that’s a dude right?’ and the SO just scoffed ‘no’.

I’ve always understood Yuuga’s appeal, but it never clicked with me personally. But nine rows from her? I get it. Even my friend, who is a as straight as an arrow, went wow a few times. God bless Yuuga.

My heart’s still racing <3

It would have been nice to see the Crows in their true form. And get to see more of the girls going back to their own castles and stuff, but what can you do? Considering the time frame, they got through a heck of a lot of this arc, and there’s only so much they can do with budget constraints. Aichi certainly did not help in that. I’m honestly not sure why they didn’t make tickets cheaper and just give those that had pre booked an extra bonus or something (as it is we got cute post cards)

This musical had a really nice balance of comedy and seriousness. It felt quite real. The directorship was really good. Some of the songs were repeated from earlier musicals. Considering they were some of my faves, I’m not complaining.

The cast was excellent, as always. Thanks to the seats, I was able to see in so much more detail and was able to make lots of eye contact with the cast haha! Uranus completely stole my heart with her gaze <3

At one point I was signing up to buy the dvd. Unfortunately I didn’t ask if I could pay later (has happened other times I preorder these dvds). She didn’t confirm that with me either. So I filled out the form only to tell her I didn’t have the cash (how much money do they expect people to have on them?? Most people were spending at least 3000 on goods (many were spending more) so they expected you to have at least 20,000 ($200) on you for one musical? That’s ridiculous). She was honestly really fucking rude and basically snatched the form out of my hands and tossed it in the trash. The staff at Osaka were so much nicer.

The guys at the door were cool, and a lady was sitting in our seat. I didn’t want to cause a scene so we went to a staff member and asked to be guided to our seat (obviously he then mentioned the other chick was in the wrong seat). There was a surprising amount of foreigners, considering how few people were actually there ;; Someone I knew actually saw me but I didn’t see them haha ;;; The fans were really nice.

Except for that old fucker who felt asleep and started snoring before the interval. Fuck him. (There was a lot of old people there? Like I’m talking 55+?? Why)

Anyway, as we left, walking back to the station, a lady cut in front of us. It was one of the actresses! She had track pants with an off the shoulder white shirt, which I thought was a little odd, but then I saw she still had the shoes on. I’m still trying to figure out who she is. We didn’t approach her – she had headphones in, and kept glancing around to make sure people weren’t following her. That’s one reason why crowds are kicked out so quickly here – this is the third time I’ve seen cast leave. Depending on the area/fame, they’ll walk or taxi out of the venue, so the chance of them being spotted and harassed is pretty high. The faster the crowds are gone, the safer it is for them. In any case, I hope she enjoyed whatever she bought lol

I enjoyed it! If I lived closer I’d go see it again. I heard other people say the same. My friend was surprised by how professional it was. She really enjoyed it! I recommend seeing it if you can! If not, please support it officially where possible. Also, if you have any questions feel free to ask! This isn’t as in depth as normal, sorry ;;

[gingerandwry]

Salvador, Brazil

The day I left Brasilia for Salvador marked five weeks in Brazil (and fourteen of the past seventeen spent on the road). I was losing steam. Constantly packing and unpacking, always being a guest in someone else’s apartment, being alone nearly all the time, stifled by high temperatures and humidity and, I think more than anything else, not being able to speak the language were all taking a toll. I wanted to make the most of my time in Salvador, which everyone told me is a special place I would love, but I also started counting the days until I would be home.

In fact I was lucky to make it out of Brasilia at all. Months earlier I booked a flight on the budget airline Avianca. A few weeks before the flight they emailed me about a change, but the email only showed a different flight number. When I checked on the flight a few days ahead of time, I discovered my original flight had been canceled, and I had been rebooked on to an itinerary with a layover. At least it only added an hour of travel time, and I may have been lucky. It turns out Avianca was teetering on bankruptcy and had canceled 2,000 flights in the last two weeks of April since they were unable to pay the leases on their planes and airport slots. That might explain why on the first leg of my flight we were served only water and muffins and on the second leg the flight attendants didn’t even come through the aisle (tho it was only 45 minutes). They seemed pretty unhappy in general.

My Uber ride to the city was a bit surreal. When I planned this trip I forgot about Holy Week, and I arrived on Good Friday, a national holiday. I thought that Easter in a Catholic country might include some unusual parades or festivals, but it turns out most people go home to their families that weekend. So as I drove through the city in the middle of a Friday afternoon it was eerily quiet and deserted. I was already nervous since many people had warned me to be careful since crime was rife (even more so than everywhere else in Brazil). And I knew the area I was staying in, Centro, could be dicey, especially at night, but it sounds like everywhere in Salvador is dicey so there weren’t any great options. In any event, the crumbling buildings, stray dogs, abundant trash, closed shops and streets mostly devoid of people (except some layabouts) all added to my sense of unease.

I was staying on a public square, Largo Dois de Julho, which hosts a number of businesses, so that felt reassuring. Most were closed but I did find a couple open restaurants. I was scared of venturing further, and I didn’t want to take an Uber to a restaurant only to discover it was closed for the holiday, so I stayed close to home my first Friday night. Fortunately just two blocks away was Bar Ancora do Marujo, a truly tragic drag show dive. Bizarrely the show started with “Bye Bye Birdie”, and I must have been the only person to recognize it in the mostly young, entirely Brazilian crowd. I appreciated the obscurity but the show did not improve. I spent most of the night chatting with a friendly guy and his drunken friend who talked a lot of shit (especially about Argentinians).

On Saturday it felt like some life had been restored to the city. I was tired from lack of sleep, humid heat and homesicknesses, but was determined to press on. I headed south on (I think) the city’s main thoroughfare, Sete de Septembre. Centro soon passed into Vittoria, a much nicer (i.e. wealthier) neighborhood with lovely tree-canopied streets. There was not much to look at besides walled-off high-rises and the occasional colonial mansion. The road eventually dipped down into Barra, the city’s most popular beach. The coastline is dotted with numerous outcroppings, and Barra is marked by three forts, one still in use, one in a state of glamorous decay and one that has been restored into the Museu Nautico da Bahia, famed for its lighthouse, the Farol da Barra. The street above the beach has been made pedestrian-only and that afternoon the whole area was full of sunbathers, vendors and on-lookers like me.

Taking in the views, I meandered my way over to the museum, a history of Bahia’s relationship to the sea, full of historical displays (presented in English too!), curious artifacts and ship models. (It also exhibits some of the remnants of a famous shipwreck that was only salvaged about fifteen years ago.) I’m not a maritime aficionado, but still found all of it interesting. I especially enjoyed the restored fortress that houses the museum and lighthouse (which you can climb to the top of) as well as the fabulous views they offer.

There is not much else to do in Barra, so I bought some beer and acaraje and sat on the beach for a while. I later repositioned myself to the bay side for sunset. Salvador sits at the mouth of the very large Todos Os Santos Bay, whose mouth opens south on to the Atlantic ocean. The city is on the east side of the mouth, which makes it the only place in Brazil where you can watch the sunset on the “ocean” (actually it’s setting over the bay and behind Ilha De Itaparica, a large island, but the effect is the same). After soaking in the beautiful sunset, I left the increasingly revelrous crowds to buy some groceries and go home for an early, restful night.

Sunday was Easter, and I did not know what to expect, except that most businesses would be closed. After a leisurely start, I walked down to the waterfront and over to the Mercado Modelo, once a Customs House that stored slaves awaiting auction, now a large marketplace full of stalls selling touristy tchotchkes. I breezed through then crossed the street to the famed Elevador Lacerda, a couple Art Deco towers holding four elevators that whisk passengers from the waterfront up the hill to the Pelourinho neighborhood, for just R$0.15 (US$0.04) a ride. I really don’t understand why this is such a big deal, even highly recommended by Lonely Planet. Yes it serves a helpful function, and the views from the lookout at the top are magnificent. But inside it’s just a metal elevator with no windows. The top of the structure juts out of the cliffside but its views are spoiled by tiny window frames and dirty glass. I’m glad the elevator was there so I didn’t have to walk, but it’s hardly an attraction in itself.

Pelourinho is Salvador’s most famous, tourist-friendly neighborhood. I was planning to spend Monday there (figuring more places would be open and fewer tourists would be about), but I figured I would get a sneak peek the day before. It’s also full of churches, so I thought I might catch some Easter celebrations but alas I did not. After a tasty lunch at Bar Zulu (my first salad in ages), I visited two of the local churches, side-by-side and competing for opulence. The first was Igreja da Ordem Terceira Secular de Sao Francisco. Bucking the national trend, the exterior is extremely ornate while the interior is (relatively) subdued. Visitors can tour the rest of the complex, which includes a creepy crypt and some deeply disturbing portrayals of Jesus suffering. Not to be outdone, next door is the Igreja e Convento de Sao Francisco, a decadent Rococo stunner covered in gilded embellishments and Portuguese tiles (tho its exterior is a fairly modest Neoclassical facade). I decided to save the rest of Pelourinho for the next day, so after snapping a few more pics in the light of the setting sun, I headed back down the hill to my apartment (before it got dark and scary).

What a difference a (working) day makes. When I looked out my window Monday morning, the city seemed to have returned to normal. My AirBnB was on Largo Dois de Julho, and it was bustling with shops and street vendors, and the streets were densely packed with shoppers and pedestrians. I made my way up the hill back to Pelourinho. It’s a very charming, pretty area of narrow cobblestone streets, scenic plazas, historic churches and small colonial-era homes, mostly restored in the last twenty years. It encompasses several paradoxes that made it hard for me to settle on my feelings toward the place.

The word Pelourinho translates as “pillory” (”a wooden framework with holes for the head and hands, in which an offender was imprisoned and exposed to public abuse” aka the stocks). And indeed slaves were often publicly punished in the area, which is nowadays postcard-perfect and full of tourists and street performers. It was the historical center of town, and its wealth was driven by the slave trade. When slavery was banished and penniless slaves were set free in Salvador, the city went into decline as the money left. It is now a poor, often dangerous city, and Pelourinho was not “rediscovered” and cleaned up for tourists until the 1990s. Yet none of this history is visible anywhere, and slavery is only mentioned in the context of the slave church (more on that below).

My first impression of the neighborhood was that it was now pandering to tourists and had lost its character, like a post-Guiliani Times Square. But it’s more nuanced than that. For one, its character before was poor and decrepit, so it has certainly improved even if that meant losing some elements. Also there are many locals there as well. They come for the cultural spaces, performance venues and bars (tho the restaurants seem distinctly touristy). Many work in the area as was clear at lunchtime. And a few steps away will lead you to streets that look like any other, with markets, consumer goods stores, etc. that cater only to locals.

Some of the locals, however, are there just for the tourists. Pick-pocketing and panhandling are rife, and everybody is looking for a way to get your money, legitimately or otherwise. As a tall, very white guy with red hair, I felt like I had a target on my back. Every time I entered the area, I was ambushed. Some asked for money, some tried to shove some ribbons into my hand (they are a local religious emblem) so that I would buy them, some showed me their displays of trinkets and some offered food. It was nerve-wracking having random strangers lunge at me constantly or make a beeline across the street for me, especially knowing how frequent muggings are in Salvador. It’s exhausting saying “Obrigado nao” all the time. And most of these people will not accept the first “Nao” so they aggressively keep demanding, which then makes me worry how they are going to react. I quickly learned not to stand still, not to let anyone engage me in conversation and not to sit at a street-side table at a restaurant. These measures only lessen the number of encounters, and they hardly make for a pleasurable visit. (And this happens all over the city-- one of the street kids who hangs around the plaza in front of my AirBnB told me that “tourists have money”-- but Pelourinho is the most touristed area so it is most prevalent there.)

So it’s a beautiful, historic neighborhood, well-restored but white-washed, that almost looks like a section of Disneyland but which locals continue to embrace and frequent and where I enjoyed walking around but was relentlessly accosted. I have conflicting feelings about it all, but in the end, it’s still a beautiful, fun, important area that shouldn’t be missed. Pelourinho centers around four plazas, ringed by multiple churches. I began at Praca de Se, whose 400 year-old cathedral was actually torn down in 1933 and which nowadays has little to offer (except a fountain and some fenced-off remnants of the cathedral’s foundation). Next to it is Terreiro de Jesus, the biggest square that is home to the Catedral Basilica, an elegant, only-slightly-overwrought Jesuit church from the 1600s. The plaza itself looks like a wonderful gathering point for all types, but unfortunately it was walled off for construction.

I explored some of the side streets which are full of restaurants and tourist shops and made my over to Largo do Pelourinho whose slope, triangular shape and colorful old buildings make it the perfect spot for photographs. At the base of the square is the sky blue Igreja Nossa Senhora do Rosairo dos Pretos, a church built by slaves (in their spare time) over the entire 18th century (on land granted by the King of Portugal). The interior does not match the facade’s beauty, but its significance to the black population for 300 years makes it an interesting stop.

The road then continues uphill into the Carmo neighborhood, which looks similar but slightly less cute. The defining structure there is the Igreja da Ordem Terceira do Carmo, a massive church and former convent atop the hill. It too is less impressive inside tho it does offer some magnificent city views. The street continues into the Santo Antonio neighborhood which is still more run down but in a decidedly hip fashion. It is now being reclaimed by small pousadas (inns), restaurants, music stores, boutiques, etc. So far they seem to be succeeding at restoring the area and adding to its character without sacrificing its authenticity. One advantage, as I found when I stopped for a coffee at Cafelier, is that the buildings on the west side of the street are perched high on the hill so they enjoy sweeping bay views.

I wandering back to Largo Terreiro de Jesus for my last stop at the Museu Afro-Brasileiro, which is housed in the fantastic pink colonial Faculdade de Medicina building. The museum started with eight artifacts in 1972 and has since acquired an important collection of items linking African and Brazilian cultures. It is much smaller than its counterpart in Sao Paulo, but that makes it easier to focus and understand the exhibits. The undisputed highlights are the 27 stunning carved wood panels by the artist Carybe, one for each of the deities of the local Candomble religion. Feeling much better about Salvador, I walked back home for a quiet Monday night.

It was raining Tuesday morning so I started late. My first stop was the Museu de Arte Moderna housed in Solar do Unhao, a well-preserved former sugar mill and transfer station. The “museum” was underwhelming. The one exhibit occupied just one room plus a small side room with a video installation (it looked like there was an upstairs that was closed). The featured artist’s works examine colonialism’s enduring impacts. Some of the paintings were quite captivating, and nearly all had large gashes meant to resemble open wounds, which was very unsettling (as I’m sure she intended). With little to see, I did not stay long and, after walking around the marina only to discover the only restaurants were seriously over-priced, I took a car up to the Itapagipe Penninsula.

The main attraction here is the Igreja Nossa Senhora do Bonfim, the origin of the colorful ribbons that people are always trying to get me to buy. Apparently the Senhora effects miracle cures, and those ribbons grant wishes. I was pleased to see the plaza in front was undergoing a well-executed makeover that makes it a very pleasant place to hang out. Unfortunately the construction inside was still in progress so the entire altar was blocked off while the workers’ loud clangs and bangs diminished the overall effect. It’s not a particularly pretty church anyway. The only part that interested me was the Sala dos Milagres where people leave photos and even wax replicas of body parts to request cures or give thanks for successful ones. Hundreds of detached limbs hang from the ceiling. But other than that the church really is not worth the journey unless you’re very superstitious religious.

From the church I started walking west toward the bay. None of my guidebooks mentioned it, but I happened to read somewhere that a nearby lookout point offered some great views. After 20 minutes of walking I reached the coast and yet another old fort, Forte de Monte Serrat. The attempted military museum inside was falling apart, but the views around the fort were indeed fantastic. Looking to the south I saw a very serene, almost empty beach and to the north a number of small fishing boats and kids playing in the water. It struck me that this must be Salvador at its best. I walked along the beach a little then back up to the fishing area which is an outcropping called Ponta do Humaita. There is not much there: an old church (of course), a long pier, a little lighthouse and what appear to be some old military buildings. But there were kids diving in the water, locals chatting and drinking beer at the small restaurant and a few other tourists checking out the views. It’s a really nice spot, far removed from grit and/or tourist centers of the rest of the city.

That evening I headed back to Pelourinho since Lonely Planet said it comes alive on Tuesday nights after mass. There were a good number of people about, one especially crowded bar, a live band and some drumming groups, tho it did not seem like this was unusual. Still it was fun to see the area at night and sit outside eating dinner watching the band in the Cruzeiro de Sao Francisco square. I walked around a bit and ordered a large beer from the bar. But of course standing outside drinking invited the usual assault from people wanting things from me (some even asking for a sip of beer). I relented with one guy and let him tie one of those stupid ribbons on my wrist (which I realized made me look even more a target). I only had a 20 so I asked for 15 back (which I think is still pretty generous). He went to get change then came back and put a crumpled bill and more ribbons in my hand-- of course it was only 10. Another guy witnessed this and tried to do the same thing, and when I refused him, he insisted he had AIDS. Federal police from the military stand guard everywhere, but like the restaurant staffers, they do nothing to try to curb the begging. This was all too much so I went home, frustrated that I couldn’t enjoy a nice evening in the city’s prettiest area.

On Wednesday I surprised myself by waking up early to join a boat tour of the Todos Os Santos bay. It’s a large, beautiful bay with 56 islands which are mostly cloistered close to land. As a solo traveler my only option was to join a large boat with dozens of other travelers. That is not my style at all but I hoped it would be worth it. The vessel, the “Maria Mulata” (!), was full with about sixty people, but it was comfortable enough. It took 1.5 hours to reach our first stop, so in the meantime, the crew passed around fresh fruit and caipirinhas, and a jovial three-man band played music. One of my fears was that I would be pressed into small-talk with strangers all day, but it turns out that I was the only English speaker aboard so I barely talked to anyone (which grew tedious). Most passengers were Brazilians along with a few Argentinians (a standard tourist mix here). The band were working hard to create a festive atmosphere, so there was a lot of encouragement to clap and sing along. I’ve never cared for this kind of enforced enjoyment so I just smiled and tapped my feet. But sticking out as I do, the band leader quickly signaled me out and had me get up and do a silly synchronized arm waving dance. I at least showed them I have some swagger in my hips, and everyone seemed really nice so I didn’t mind. The journey was tough tho because it was all in Portuguese, and I would repeatedly get drawn into interactions where all I could do was smile and say, “Sim!”

We finally reached Ilha dos Frades, a beautiful tropical nature preserve. I walked around the small accessible section, through the tiny village which was oddly buzzing with lots of construction, up to the cute little church on the hill and then down to the beach for some beer, swimming and relaxing. It was all quite nice.

After a couple hours we got back on the boat. Halfway across the bay, we encountered some engine trouble (ah... Brazil) and just sat and swayed in the waves while the band tried to keep everyone’s spirits up. After 20-30 minutes another tour boat came along and tugged us to the next stop, Ilha de Itaparica, the bay’s biggest island. There was no dock here so we had to transfer to small speed boats that carried us to shore. This stop was for lunch at a lovely restaurant/resort, but the beach in front of it was not nice at all. We did not stay long tho and soon were being ferried back to a new, bigger boat. This operation took a long time since I think we had merged with another group or two. By the time we started moving, it was getting close to sunset so we headed right back to Salvador. I think there was supposed to be another stop at a nicer beach but clearly we had run out of time. This was very frustrating, but none of the staff seemed to acknowledge it or apologize or offer some compensation, like free drinks on board. At least the ride back during sunset was wonderfully beautiful, but the tour was disappointing overall. I figured we spent just three of the eight hours on the islands. As lovely as that lunch was, they need to find a new spot that is more accessible and has a nicer beach so we could have spent the whole afternoon there.

That night I did something I almost never do: I followed The New York Times’ travel advice. I find their “36 Hours” pieces pretentious and aimed at their readers’ narcissistic desires to have a more “authentic” vacation than everyone else. They tend to ignore the things most tourists enjoy and to recommend expensive restaurants and out-of-the way spots so that their readers can feel like they’re doing something special and unique. But there is not a lot for tourists to do in Salvador and (as the NYT acknowledges) much of the city is too dangerous for tourists to explore. So I thought I would try out some of the recommendations from their article in January. Yes, they have some expensive suggestions and steer you to some far-off places, but to their credit, they start in Pelourinho, admitting that despite the tourism and aggressive tourist hunters there, it’s still the nicest part of town. And they were right about the restaurant where I ate Wednesday night, Mistura Perfeita. It’s near the center and looks like every other hole in the wall here with plastic tables and chairs setup out front, but they serve incredible lambretas (clams cooked in an oniony broth) and delicious caipirinhas in a a wide variety of exotic fruit flavors. And they get extra points for being the only restaurant I visited where the staff actively shoed away beggars from the outside diners. (Still, the NYT couldn’t help itself: it praises the Mouraria neighborhood as “gloriously not prettied up for visitors”, as if the writer were foolish enough to walk around the area at 8:30p when they claimed to be there.)

By Thursday I had run out of things to do so I stayed in all day and caught up on this blog. That evening I headed to Rio Vermhelo, a seaside area up the coast from Barra that’s know for its nightlife (and was also recommended by the NYT). It’s a 20-30 minute drive from the center, and it feels very apart. It’s much newer, cleaner and safer than the rest of Salvador with far fewer street people but it lacks the Afro-ness the city is known for. It’s a nice, pretty area and the only place I’ve felt entirely safe and comfortable walking around. But it feels like it could be any coastal neighborhood in Brazil or anywhere else for that matter. For locals I imagine it’s a nice escape. The focal points (besides the beach) are several plazas lined with interchangeable restaurants and countless vendors (mostly selling acaraje or tapioca). Several hosted live music. I was disappointed at how generic the restaurants are-- they’re essentially the same as all the others around the city but newer-- until I realized that Salvadoreans like generic restaurants. They just want to sit outside with their friends sharing beer and snacks, so it doesn’t matter where those come from. They like the familiar and comfortable, and I get that. As I explored the area a little more I discovered it also has some hipper, more discreet bars with DJs, live music and younger crowds (more like American bars). All in all it seems like a cool area and probably the best place for tourists to stay, despite-- or because of-- its distance from the center. Also, for the (newspaper of) record, NYT got Rio Vermelho all wrong. They recommended a bar that serves weird, sugary shot concoctions and the least interesting, most touristy plaza. Take that “36 Hours”.

Friday was another day with nothing to do (except counting the hours until my flight home). I took the Elevador down to Comerico, the waterfront neighborhood below Pelourinho. It’s one of the city’s original neighborhoods and I guess it is still the commercial center, tho it was hardly bustling. It’s full of beautiful old buildings which have mostly been left to rot. Some have masked their decay with fresh paint; others are fabulously deteriorated like ancient ruins. It’s quite a sight, especially juxtaposed with the more modern office buildings that have sprung up among them.

That evening I packed excitedly, well ready to be home. And then, somewhat unexpectedly, my last night turned out to be pretty special. I had planned to go back to Santo Antonio to Forte da Capoeira since I thought there would be a capoeira show there. But when I looked out my window, I saw the building across the street was hosting an event with drummers and dancers, so I went to check it out. It appeared to be the closing night party for a symposium on African culture in Bahia. And right in front was a group of 8-16 year-olds putting on a capoeira show. Obviously they were novices (although some had good moves) but I caught the gist, and the kids looked like they were having a really good time. I also enjoyed the variety of people that passed by to watch for a few minutes, particularly the grandmother with her baby granddaughter who loved playing with some trans women’s dogs. Dois de Julho is a gritty area but a colorful, diverse, tolerant one (like San Francisco’s Tenderloin).

Later, for the first time in Brazil, I went out to a gay club. I resisted before since I knew it would mostly be me standing around, watching, unable to talk with anyone. And that’s pretty much how it happened, but I’m still glad I went. Everyone was enjoying themselves (and others...), and it was fun and interesting to note the similarities and differences to bars back home. Then it was back to my AirBnB to sleep one last night in Brazil.

It took me a while to warm up to Salvador. Everyone said the same three things about it: one, you’re going to love it; two, it’s different from the rest of Brazil and more African; and three, be careful it’s really dangerous. When I heard this from Brazilians, I sometimes suspected two and three were code for “poor and black.” From what people had told me, I half-expected to see women carrying jugs on their heads, donkey-drawn carts jostling with cars while chickens scurried out of the way, muggers lurking in every doorway and nonstop singing, dancing and drumming. These are quarter-truths at best. Salvador is unmistakably Brazilian in its look and feel, tho many people sport more African-looking styles and behave more forwardly and loudly. While the city’s general state of disrepair shows its age, it is actively building and modernizing. Crime rates are high here, but I exercised common sense and did not encounter any problems. (There are a LOT of homeless and beggars, and they can be quite aggressive and demanding, but this is a far cry from mugging.) And while I did hear a lot of music (and firecrackers) around the city, most of it was coming out of speakers not street corner performers.

My timing was unfortunate, visiting at the fatigued end of my trip and starting on a quiet holiday weekend. Not only was the city duller than usual, the emptiness exaggerated my fears for my safety. But as the city normalized during the week and really picked up on Friday night, I started to see all its wonderful qualities and appreciate its color and vitality. Still it was hard to ignore the city’s drawbacks. Every time I went outside, I was targeted by beggars, scammers, vendors and anyone else who wants a dollar, and many of them were extremely difficult and unpleasant. When I can’t just sit outside and enjoy a beer without being harassed, it severely curtails my enjoyment of a place. Safety concerns also kept me from exploring most of the city or walking around at night, which are my favorite things to do when traveling. In Brasilia I couldn’t walk by design, in Salvador by decline.

And finally, beyond safety concerns, it’s not an easy city to be a tourist. There is not much to do (especially if you don’t care for the beach). It’s difficult-to-impossible to find information online, and when you do it’s often incorrect-- even the tourism agencies don’t have websites. (In fact I’m writing this in an otherwise very nice, contemporary, “American-style” cafe that requires a Facebook account to get on their WiFi which I do not have.) And Bahians, like much of the rest of Brazilians, do not seem to care much for outsiders. To Salvador’s credit, I saw improvement works projects all over the city-- several of them impeding my tourism-- so they are working on making it a nicer, easier place (at least the tourist areas). However I suspect it will take them decades to undo the decline of the past hundred years, and it would take a significant shift in culture and crime rates before tourists really feel welcome.

Salvador reminded me in some ways of Philadelphia, where I went to college 20 years go. Proud, defensive Philadelphians were well aware of the generally negative view of their city, and they were quick to remind me that it was the nation’s first capital. (To which I responded that New York was the second, but they seem to have moved on.) Salvador’s motto is “First Capital of Brazil” (the second capital, Rio, also seems to have moved on). Like Philadelphia, its glory days are behind it, and the city seems to be slowly decaying with pockets of revitalization. But I think that’s how the people there like it; it’s part of the city’s unique character and culture. Ultimately I am undecided on Salvador. I did not love it as much as everyone told me I would; its qualities are largely counterbalanced by its drawbacks. And I think that’s just how the locals want it.