#bruh there are too many combinations for these three
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tallfroggieart · 1 year ago
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AGH HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!!! (ft., ofc, our favorite ot3)
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muselin · 2 years ago
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I'm blushing so hard lol I sent my friend a wip I'm working on (that yeonkai threesome) and I got carried away and that became one of the best segments so I had to send it her last night, she saw and she loved it! I sent her the shibari pics too I sent you and she said "they're fine but not as fine as that wip damn" 🫠🥰😍😳👀🤭🤪
Spoilers I will give
Multiple positions
Multiple orgasms from all three
All three are switches
Implications about readers sexual relationships with them
Some of it has degrading, but reader is confident af
Consent and they check up on eachother (plus water breaks)
Signing off, but come on I know you'll know who this is haha -😳 anon
Late answering this but Holy shit it sounds amazing! 😱😱 I'm super curious now, yeonkai are such an interesting combination, they could go either way- sweet and teasing, unhinged and naughty, so many possibilities!! And water breaks lol, woooo that must be a LOT of fucking if we need multiple water breaks bruh
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color-ns · 4 years ago
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Happy birthday undertale!
Man, the 5 anniversary for undertale is already here! I feels like it’s been forever since last year. I mean, can you believe I started this blog a year ago? I can’t at all.
So, last year I personally thanked all of my favorite undertale artists, blogs, and writers for being here and making my day every time they post. So, I’d like to do this again, but maybe less people, because I follow a lot more people now, I want to give a longer thank you to them, and if I’d list them all this will be too long.
Let’s get to it!
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First I’d like to start with Toby fox, (@fwugradiation) the genius, creative guy, how did you even come up with this idea you amazing guy. You changed so many people’s life, personality, and social life, and to shorten, people. Thank you, we will all be forever grateful for everything you, temmie and the rest of the team did for us.
@absolutedream-undertaleart over the void was one of the very first things that  caught my eye in the undertale community, and I was so excited about your idea, I had to see if there is more like this. Thank you!
@alainaprana , you make the best comics, I always enjoy them! You and @little-noko always make me smile, because your friendship is so real and you’re supporting each other’s content all the time.
Also if speaking of @little-noko, I ADORE your comics and I get my most of my inspiration, dedication, and growth out of paper crayon. Thank you! My comic exist because of you!
@kuttiesstuff dude, you’re so fricking funny, I love everything about your comic! You make me laugh so hard all the time, whether you post you comic, or answer questions.
@unu-nunu-art I first saw your art in @ask-glitch-and-squid blog, and IMMEDIATELY fell in love! You. Are. So. GOOD. You comics, art, and characters are so inspiring, funny and beautiful! keep creating!
@zu-is-here man, I discovered your blog only recently, but mannnnn do you make me happy. your art is so cool, and your so polite and sweet, no wonder everyone on your blog sends you love so much. You’re incredible!
@lynxgriffin bruh, dude, I LOVE YOUR COMIC. I don’t know what else to tell ya. I mean the fact that I get so excited to see you updated your comic I want to jump in place is kind of obvious right? Wait no? Then let me tell ya. THANKS FOR EXISTING.
@metakazkz you make your comics so simple, easy to read, and I love the fact you upload not once a year. Your dedication is so inspiring, and I don’t really care what version of abysstale is it, I love it, and I love you and your content.
@bettinalevyisdetermined your voice is so lively, and every undertale comic you dub, I enjoy it to the core. You make frisk sound so cute! Thanks!
@onebizarrekai for every single thing you made for the community! Dreamswap, Isaac Beamer, grayscale and so much more. Do you even take breaks bro? You made so much, it’s  incredible.
@dryemiddi your comic is so unique! your art style, story, and especially the fact you did a comic with sans OUT of the story. not every person on the community can think of such, well, unthinkable idea! You can make a horrified or angry face, and it would accidentally scare me! X’D your expressions are so detailed, you can see you worked years to get to that level. Thank you! I really look up to you!
@hiimtryingtounderfell I first saw your comic from a comic dub. maybe I didn’t follow you until a few months ago, but from the very start I fell in love with your comic and art. I’ve been a fan for about 3 years. 3 years! and You’re still one of my favorites. <3
@xxtc-96xx you probable already got something like this today already, and I know you’re taking a break from undertale, but thank you. even if you decide to move on from undertale, I’ll still follow you. You make such good content, and I don’t care that you’re taking a break, because that’s ok. So, thank you for making such good art and sharing it with the world.
@xx-avj-xx you’re so funny, you make me laugh every other comic! not that many people come up with so many jokes for comics so frequently too. You draw incredible, and your style fits your humour so perfectly! You have so many characters and storys, i doesn’t matter whether someone’s new or been your fan for years, there is still to discover about you! Thank you for making a lust error that nobody asked you to make, Because nobody even thought about it.
@mramazingva without your sans voice what would the community be without you? A sad and voiceless place that’s what! You make every comic more alive then it was before you voiced it, and you work every week to make people happy. What can be more inspiring then that?
@tatatale bruh, your art is so beautiful! (If you don’t consider olivetale lol) insans interactions with every character is so fricking hilarious, and no matter how many comics people will make about him, (and i’m sure there will be) you’ll be the only one that can make him like how he really is. I can babble about all your other characters and your story all day, but I’m afraid that will be too long. Love your stuff!
@askfallenroyalty your writing always hits you in the face, and before you can even get up, you get knocked down again. You make every characters feeling as much as important as the other, and you don’t forget anything important in your story. You combined deltarune and undertale so perfectly, how can you not read this? You don’t try to make every update perfect, but that’s what so good about it.
@shattereddreamsau I was sad when you said the comic was going down, because I would wait for every update, make an alarm and read it patiently, and now that it’s over I don’t know what to do. But I respect your reasons, and I will not remember it by the fact that it’s over, but by the fact that it’s here, and I enjoyed every second of reading it.
And @slylock-syl, I saved you for last. Why? Because I love you the most! The first I saw of you was on a comic dub, three years ago, and started following you only 2 years later. wait, that’s a year ago! Yes, you were the first blog I followed on tumblr, and not only that, you made me download the app looking for more content! That’s because your comic is addictive, with beautiful art, full of action, with so much imagination, full of love, dedication, eye catcher, and has the best love story ever. Your reply to what I said last year made me want to jump in place, because I caught your attention even for just a moment. You probably don’t remember, but i do. So thank you, for everything you gave me without you knowing. For everything you made me feel even if you didn’t know. For making a comic that someone out there loves, until this day.
also a big thank you for my friend @amemi0 that is supporting me from afar, and my friend @cheese-and-peppers that let me use his birthday present, to the anniversary out of burnout. You are the best guys. Also, thank you 48 followers! actually I look at every blogs content that follows me. Some I even followed back!
To sum up this very very very long post, good night everyone and happy birthday undertale! Let us grow bigger and weirder!
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sirloozelite · 2 years ago
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SLE’s Star Wars Hunger Games: Season 5 - Swtor Edition: Episode 10 - Tenebrae Strikes Back
Episode number 10 time. Still a fair few people left as well. I wonder how much longer this nonsense will go on for? Lets find out!
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Night 11 can be summed up in one snippet.
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Yeah... that’s about it really. Next!
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Day 12 dawns... and with it...
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Someone is helping Beniko?! I wonder who?
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Good guy Guss being nice again and not hunting anyone down.
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Um... hopefully by ‘fish’, it doesn’t mean Guss!
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Obi-Wan would be horrified by this. XD
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I.... WHAT?! Seriously?! R.I.P Skadge, Vette and Overseer Harkun.
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OH COME ON!!! AGAIN!!!! REALLY TENEBRAE?! ANOTHER ZIOST/NATHEMA MOMENT!
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9 confirmed survivors! Yay!
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Bowdarr you bastard! That was harsh! And Koth and Guss... come on guys!? R.I.P Raina Temple, Koth Vortena and Languss Tuno.
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Three more made it out alive, thank god!
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All of that madness happened in the day?! Oh lord! How bad is the night going to be!
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0_0
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Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Can Lana even sing? Gotta be better than Senya at least!
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Baras and Elara? That’s a weird combination.
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Poor Andronikos having to deal with some nasty neighbors. XD
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The cornucopia has been replenished in the middle of the night?! That’s not a good sign.
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5 wise people... or are they wise?
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Holy mother of.... Garza!! That was a tad extreme! R.I.P Bowdarr.
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Baras!!! Bruh!!!! R.I.P Andronikos Reval!
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OH COME ON!! REALLY! THAT’S HOW LANA DIES!? R.I.P Lana Beniko. Say bye bye to another of your champions @rangerslayer-97​
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2 more wise people it seems.
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:(
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The unlucky number day dawns. Please no one else die! We’ve had too many of those this episode already!
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That’s better. Some peace and quite... mostly.
Let’s stop there before any more madness kicks off. I guess the simulator thought we needed to thin the ranks of the contestants a bit this episode huh? Let’s have a look at who is left.
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Only 10 contestants are left now! Damn... maybe we are closer to the end than I thought! 5 whole districts got wiped out in this episode alone! My condolences to Team Warrior, Inquisitor, Smuggler, Alliance and Random leftover team. Hopefully the next episode will be a bit more peaceful... or at least a bit more merciful on the deaths! XD
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queenxxxsupreme · 4 years ago
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Soft prompt idea: First time Lambert's SO tells him "I love you" ❤
A/N: I AM ON FUCKING FIRE TODAY and I’m so happy 🙂 I hope you like this babe!! Also this might be a little OOC for Lambert, but he’s being a softy in this so it really is OOC for him to be a big softy but that’s okay because we love him anyways!
***
 Lambert followed a few paces behind you, guiding Champion by his reins. 
The three of you were traveling through a swampy area in Velen. Lambert promised you on this part of your journey that you’d be able to take a little bit of time in the swamp to collect whatever herbs and things you wanted while you were passing through. You were excited. The swamps held so many wondrous things you couldn’t find in the North. 
The witcher made sure to follow behind you, but not too far behind you. He wanted to be able to keep his eyes peeled for any signs of danger without his paranoid behavior distracting you. 
You came to a stop, pulling the knife on your hip out. You stepped off of the small dirt path, picking up your skirt as best as you could with one hand, and moved towards a large rock covered in moss. 
“Watch where you’re stepping, bug.”
“I am.” You knelt down by the rock and examine the moss. “Can you hand me one of the empty jars from my satchel?”
Lambert moved around to Champion’s side, opening your satchel and digging around inside for a moment to find an empty little jar. 
“Is this one good?” He asked, holding up a relatively small jar.
“Yes, that works. Thank you.”
Once he passed it to you, you were able to scrape off enough moss to fill the jar.
“What is that for?”
“Moss is good for lots of stuff.” You passed the jar to him. “Coughs. Covering wounds.”
Lambert furrowed his brows together for a moment. 
“Isn’t that what bandages are for?”
“Yes.” You grinned just a little. “Don’t question my ways, Master Witcher. I don’t question your methods, do I?”
The corners of his lips tugged up a little as he gave Champion’s reins a little tug to continue following you. 
You lifted your skirts up and stepped into a rather deep mud puddle, sinking a few inches into the dark brown substance.
Lambert chuckled a little. 
“What’s so funny?” You asked him, moving between a couple trees to get to a fern bush. 
“You always get after me when I get mud on my boots.”
“Because you don’t take them off at the door and wear them through my house.” You shot him a look. “And most of the time, you boots stink of rotten corpses.”
“It’s not my fault the dead monster juices get everywhere.” He muttered. 
Your nose scrunched up at his choice of words. 
You gathered what you needed from the fern bush and began to make your way back to him. 
“Please never describe it that way ever again, Lambert.”
He grinned, happy with himself, and took the fern pieces from you to put into a sachet. 
A little while had passed and you found quite a lot of ingredients for your work. A peaceful silence had fallen between you and Lambert. He’d pull out a jar or sachet whenever you needed it and then put it away for you. 
You couldn’t find the right words to describe how happy you were that he was okay with this. Previous lovers had all looked down on you going out and getting dirty in the woods for plants and rocks. Some even discouraged you from doing so even though it was a necessary part of your job. 
As the end of the swamp came into sight, you moved on to the dirt path to walk alongside Lambert. You looked over to him, chewing on your bottom lip. He met your gaze, confused. 
“What?”
“It’s nothing.” You shook your head, smiling a little. “Just…. Thank you for doing this with me.”
“I wasn’t going to let you come out here alone.” He shrugged his shoulders. “And we were passing through anyway.”
You nodded your head a little. 
***
When nightfall came, you were lucky enough to find an inn. While Lambert went to stable Champion, you had a bath drawn. 
You were absentmindedly dragging the soapy washcloth up and down your arm when there was a knock on the door to the room. 
“Bug?”
“In here, Lambert.” You lifted your head, sitting up a little straighter. 
He walked in, closing the door behind himself. 
“I was gonna go down to our room, but there’s a lot of unsavory folk lingering around in the halls and I’d hate to have to skip town tonight ‘cause one of them decided to do something stupid.” He said, leaning against the door. 
“I’ll be done in just a few minutes.” You told him, picking up the chunk of soap sitting on the side of the tub. You got the washcloth nice and soapy again before you went back to work on cleaning yourself. 
“You’ve been awfully quiet today, bug.” Lambert commented. 
You looked up at him for a moment, then brought your eyes back down to your leg. 
“Usually you talk my damn ear off.”
“Just…. Thinking.” 
Your tone was off. You had been thinking all evening. He knew something was wrong, that there was something on your mind you weren’t telling him. 
The witcher pushed himself away from the door and moved to the side of the tub, kneeling down so he’d be at your level. Silently, he held his hand out for the washcloth. You handed it to him. He used his other hand to gently take hold of your chin. He turned your head towards him and began to wipe the dirt and mud from your forehead. 
“About what?” His breath was warm against your face.
“How I…. I’ve never had someone do what you did for me today.”
His eyes avoided yours, choosing instead to focus on the smudge on your temple. 
“Wasn’t much I did. We were just traveling through a shithole. Figured you’d have fun messing around in the mud.”
“Yeah.” You couldn’t help but look down, tilting your head too. “But my previous partners, they’ve never…. They’d never allow me to do such a thing as walk out in the swamps like that. They’d never let me off the horse, let alone off the path. Some…. Some wouldn’t even let me collect herbs or my stones.”
Lambert furrowed his brows together. 
“What kind of moron wouldn’t let a mage get shit they need for their work?”
You smiled just a little. 
“Not everyone is as open minded and as nice you, darling.”
“You make me sound like some sort of saint.” He snorted. He dipped the washcloth into the water to rinse it off. 
You were silent once more. 
Lambert put the washcloth on the side of the tub and stood up. 
He wasn’t too sure what was going through your head, sometimes it was difficult to read you, and sometimes it was hard for him to figure out the right way to approach the situation to get you to open up to him.  
He turned to go back to the door to stand guard, but he got just a few steps away from the tub when you spoke. 
“I think I’m…. That I’m in love with you.” You whispered.
The witcher turned on his heels to face you, brows drawing together. 
“.... Because of the swamp?” 
“No, no. I-I mean, it’s a combination of things.” You suddenly felt like maybe bringing this up while you were naked in the tub wasn’t the best of ideas. You pulled your knees as close to your chest as possible and crossed your arms over your chest. “I’ve-I’ve wanted to say it for a while. I mean, we’ve been together for a year and a half, almost two years. I just….”
Lambert looked down for a moment, rubbing the back of his neck. 
“If-If you don’t feel the same-,”
“No, I do. I do.” He shook his head. “Just…. didn’t think this would come up here, in the dingy bath of a crusty inn in Velen. Kinda wanted to try to be a little romantic about it. Maybe do it on our two years? But romantic shit makes me queasy.” 
You smiled softly at him. 
“Why don’t, uh, why don’t you get out and get dressed? And then we can finish this not in here?” 
You nodded your head. 
You stood up and Lambert retrieved a towel for you, wrapping it around your shoulders. You thanked him and stepped out of the tub to dry off. He moved back to the door, wanting to give you space while you got dressed.
Once you were in proper clothes, you walked together down to the room you’d be staying in for the night. While Lambert secured the door, you climbed into bed. 
“What was your idea of making it a little romantic?” You asked him, watching him as he came around to the side of the bed and got in. 
“I don’t know.” He shrugged his shoulders, running his hand over his hair. “I was hoping it would be at Kaer Morhen so I could make you dinner. Eskel has a stash of really nice wine in his room. I was going to steal a bottle.”
“It sounds lovely.” You rested your head on his chest. “You know, you can still do that.”
“I know. I will.” Lambert began to trace shapes on your back as he stared at the ceiling. “I know I’m not the best at showing it, but I do…. I love you, bug. You mean a lot to me.”
“It’s okay. I love you too, Lambert.” You looked up to kiss him softly. “And I think it’s rather cute that our first time saying it to each other was in a crusty Velen inn.”
“It sure fits us.”
Taglist: @pressedinthepages @mishafaye @whitewolfandthefox @wolfyland07 @belalugosisdead @persephonehemingway @keira-hulmaster @dinonuggs69 @greatestauthorofmygeneration @shadow-hunters-lover @dancingwith-thesunflowers @tedi-fach-las @thecomfortofoldstorries @raspberrydreamclouds @natkowaa @disasteren @weathervanes-my-oneandlonely @onlyhenrys @wackylurker @criminaly-supernatural @magpie343 @permanently-exhausted-witcher @hina-chans-stuff @the-space-between-heartbeats @havenoffandoms @carriebee1 @ger-bearofrivia @naominami @writingawaymylife @reaganjenelle @theawkwardpedestrian @scarlettwitcher @badassspaceprincess @just-a-sad-donut @summersong69 @an--actual--human--disaster @rubyqueen819 @omgkatinka @c-a-v-a-l-r-y @vonxcon @mazakeen @bravelittlesunflower @thereagles @awkward-turtles-world @menalliha @cotton_mo @maan24 @thefirelordm @monkeymo @krenee1drful @nympha-door-a @unadulteratedtreecrusade @Aquarius-pisces-rose @mentallyscreamingsincebirth @fl0ating @sometimesiwrite @you-fxcking-wish-bish @thanks-bruh-for-nothing @maan2442 @thegaydeath @creatingstuffinpeace @wellthisstinks @andyrazzledazzle @she-wolfoftheinquisition
If your name is in italics, it wouldn’t let me tag you :(
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partnersatfazbear · 3 years ago
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Fazbear Frights: What We Found Analysis
Here’s my analysis for What We Found, the third story in Gumdrop Angel. I wrote this as I read so it may be a little different than my previous analysis where I read the story first and went back.
If you’re a Michael Afton fan I highly recommend this. Also, there’s possibly some insight into William Afton, Mrs. Afton, and Henry too, so it’s worth a skim.
Pg 144 '...a place thirty-some years forgotten' Just reconfirming FNAF 3 is 30 years past *one* of the FNAF closings, presumably FNAF 2 location.
Pg 145 "The whole building was giving him [Hudson] a headache." FIX THE VENTILATION BRUH
Pg 148 '...they were able to use salvaged derelict equiptment original to the old pizzerias.' Another confirmation of something we heard from Phone Guy.
Pg 147 "How old are you?" "Twenty-three, same as you." I think this gives us Michael's age during FNAF 3.
EDIT: This kept me awake last night. Obviously this is impossible because he has to be alive for at least 10 years before 1983, BUT maybe its just reconfirming FNAF 3′s year? 2023?
Pg 149 "Hudsan's dad died and his mom married Lewis, a ridiculous balding man who wore plaid vests and smoked a pipe" Did... Did this book just seriously imply Mrs. Afton left William for Henry? Really? (Yes, there's differences; the husband is dead and the man wears plaid 'vests' but it seems very odd to include that detail. This could just have been the writer's own imagination, though.) I have seen this as a fan theory and 100% explains the jealousy aspect of William, but I can't help but kinda hate it. I think this is very important, though, and probably Scott's intention. "This horrible little man [Lewis]... would make Hudson's next ten years a living Hell" This REALLY intrigues me given the context I just went over. The text implies Lewis was fairly neglectful to our main character / Michael stand-in Hudson. Maybe I'm wrong and for some reason Mrs. Emily left and went to William? XD Haha, I'm reading too much into this page. Maybe I'll come back to this later. I figure it's more of Scott possibly including double-details (contradicting stuff with the same character that really applies to two, which has been something I heavily pointed out in previous anaylsis on this blog) Having said that, I'm going w/the former because I can't imagine Henry being abusive (neglectful yes, abusive no) and he's never been portrayed that way in official works like William has in the novels.
Pg 150 "Hudson began to screw up in class...a product of spending the night in fear that his stepfather [Lewis]... [would] beat him just for the fun of it." Ooof. Big confirm on William actually being abusive. Unless we stick with the Henry theory for Lewis (combined with Midnight Motorist Henry theory / alcoholic). "...near-daily beatings..." "his mom started taking pills to get through the day..." So, whoever Mrs. Afton is, she was definetly not paying attention. But then, most people married to serial killers either don't notice because of denial (like this) or because the killer is so manipulative / careful they can't notice.
"Barry, who had red hair and freckles..." Yo?! Is that a description of Fritz?! These friends in the story could be the other kids Michael knew's stand-in's, aka the two gravestones with names he used (Fritz and Jeremy), as shown in the checks for the games and FNAF 6. I've long figured Michael was probably friends with the victims--it makes them easier, although riskier, targets [for William]. The two friends are male, too, like Fritz and Jeremy. If you're curious about Duane's description (our stand in for Jeremy), it's "tight black shirt... muscles... black hair long enough for a glossy ponytail..." I'm not sure if this matches anything found in the novels or contradicts them, though. (The novels = TSE trilogy)
"And so it went... until the night of the fire." For context, this is before FF burns down. We're learning of Hudson's life from his close friends in childhood, his father's death, his mother remarrying, to his abusive stepfather, to his grades slipping to this line. This would be a new fire not seen/mentioned in the games...
Pg 151 "...go to Charlie's for a sundae..." Really. Really Scott. Just gonna use this name again. OK. I'm not even gonna discuss this because it's probably irrelevant. *This is confirmed on pg 158 to be an ice cream shop. No lore relevance aside the annoying name coincidences Scott loves to troll with.
"This is not... an advance into enemy territory, a fight with demons, or a descent into Hell..." Uh, what? What is Hudson talking about? XD I'm only noting it because it seems so out of place. He's probably talking about video games or something.
Another note, although I don't have a specific reference since it is mentioned off-hand many times, is that Hudson keeps referring to his "history" which is implied to have kept him from getting a well-paying job and a girl he's crushing on doesn't know this "history" which is good for him. Seems good old "Michael Stand-In" has done some jail time or something. Edit: On pg 154/155 the girl asks Hudson, "Did you do it?" Seems he may have killed his stepfather or been involved with something else just as bad. Edit 2: No, I was thinking too deep into it. This probably refers to Evan's death at Fredbear's. DUH.
Pg 156 describes an actual "prize corner" in FF! What am I even reading? IIRC this is in FNAF 3, too. So they just hand out these scary gift boxes to people that complete the attraction? (Hudson says he *would* have fun handing out the scary toys to kids when this location opens--kind of a bully thing to do, eh?)
"[Hudson] avoid[ed] glancing in any of the mirrors..." I'm only pointing this out because it could be reference to one of two things. 1) We know because of one of UCN's music tracks, William has a fear of his reflection. Michael probably shares this trait, especially since 2) after Ennard and all... and later on pg 157 it also says, "he never wanted to face: himself" Sounds like guilt, my guy.
Pg 157 "blonde hair... blue eyes..." Hudson shares an eye color with Michael. It's possible Michael had blonde hair as a child and it changed to brown (it's common, something I personally went through being technically blonde/ blue eyed myself)
"He [Hudson] knew from personal experience that toys could turn from fun...to torture ina heart-beat" Fairly self explanatory. Either Hudson's worked at a creepy location before or he doesn't like remembering Fredbear's.
*checks how much is left.* There's still 35 pages (not counting back/front) left of this... This is gonna be a lot of notes.
Pg 158 Hudson doesn't have a car. Poor Mike, probably having to walk everywhere. Especially as a corpse.
Pg 160 This page describes many physical issues Hudson has that prevents him from entering the Navy, all from the abuse of Lewis. Obvious paralell to Michael becoming an undead [because his father sent him to CBPR indirectly causing his condition]
Pg 161 "How's your granny, Hud?... ...Is she still alive?" "I don't think she can die." Does anyone in the Afton family really 'die'? XD
Pg 162 These few pages discuss Hudson's grandmother. She's described as "a seer who claimed to know the future... ...wore big men's plaid flannel shirts with baggy jeans" Um, more plaid / flannel? AGH. STAHP. Lowkey, I would totally headcanon my Aunt Jen like this, though.
Pg 163 "Hudson's mom... the way she was before Hudson's dad had died... never... particularly warm and fuzzy... but... effiencient and responsible..." More about Mrs. Afton, so that's kinda neat.
"Hudson's dad was fun and attentive." There's a good Dad in this series?
"Unfortunetly, he also struggled with mental illness." "invisible low points" (Pg 164) Kinda reminds me of how Henry is described after Charlotte's death in the books.
Pg 164 "When Steven got himself into a bad deal that cost him his small business... he'd taken his life." Oh, it is Henry! SMH. Way to use confusing paralells. So, from our understanding thus far, Hudson's real father, Steven, is our Henry stand-in. His step-father despite being described similar to Henry, is actually our William stand-in. Fair game, Scott.
Pg 164 "...he [Hudson] was locked into a supply closet..." Oh shit, you guys. So, let me go on a tangent here, because this IS important! I just watched a retrospective on Sister Location and FNAF 6 earlier and one theory for Midnight Motorist was the person in the chair was the mother and the kid was Michael. I think this little line may confirm that. In fact, the story may be the key to figuring things out. Obviously, the line is a paralell to FNAF 4's scene in which Crying Child was locked in the supply closet of Fredbear's. I know some people, including Matpat, believe[d] CC was Michael, and in this book's context, it sort of works. This does contradict Step Closer and 1000 other things that make Michael the older brother, but maybe it's hinting at MM? Abusive stepdad (possibly Henry... maybe William is gone at this point), checked out Mom (hey, grey couch lady with Foxybro's font). IDK, but its definetly something to think about.
Pg 165 Lewis is mentioned as calling Hudson "nothing" and saying "you're nothing" on several occasions on this page. Just more abuse, for those accurate fanfic writers like me. Also I kinda wanna watch Morel Orel again. Yall know my fav character is Clay. Yall know.
"You're smoke." <-- Lewis / The text later reads, "...there was some irony, given what eventually happened." BRUH. Why did your stepdad die in a fire? :V TELL ME.
"When his family's house burned down at the end of his senior year..." Huh. Is there a fire we don't know about in the game-verse? Could this explain what happened to the FNAF 4 house before MM house?!
"...it purged Hudson of Lewis and his mother." MRS. AFTON BURNED ALIVE, TOO? Bruh. I can't with this story.
The text later describes the fire is concluded to be man-made and Hudson was blamed for it. Can't say if this ties to Michael, but it IS interesting... TBF, there is a small paralell to draw between Henry in FNAF 6 and his history of suicide in the books, too.
Pg 166 "...this place's [FF] busted thermostat.." I just find this line funny.
Pg 167 "...after three weeks of keeping an eye on the place" Some more timeline context for FNAF 3. We know that Michael worked there a little while before we start playing the game thanks to one of the phone calls, IIRC, so this makes sense. If Michael was accused of [something] and also wanting to hunt down his father, then it makes perfect sense why he's working a dead end job at Freddy's over and over and over. Fun fun fun.
Pg 169 "He hated to think about a functional character [Foxy]" This line is in regards to Hudson not liking the set up of Pirate's Cove and Foxy's hook to scare people. Sounds familiar, don't it? (For Michael anyway.)
Pg 173 "Some big find is arriving tomorrow." SPRINGY BOI! COME ON BOOK, get on with the show?
Pg 176 "Granny was wearing a red-and-green plaid shirt and her baggy jeans." Nothing special, but it was specifically brought up twice. I'm kind of racking my brain trying to understand what the point of this character is outside of "woooo everything is haunted don't you know that" kind of character.
Pg 180 "...dropped the crate on the linoleum with a resounding thud." HEY. Poor Springtrap, just gettin' tossed around like the trash he is.
Pg 186 "If you weren't so stupid, I'd tell you more about it." Springtrap bringing the burn. =:)
"A voice with a burr-like rasp...hint of a Southern accent" I'm going to assume this is because it's Lewis probably in the suit in this story and not our old British lad.
"It's was Mr. Atkin's voice." THE MATH TEACHER? *goes back to check* 'The algebra teacher'. Okay...
Pg 190 Okay, so Hudson hear's Lewis' voice this time. Okay, I get it now. Springtrap in this kind of imbodies all of Hudson's old bullies, including the teacher. He also has PTSD, just FYI. IDK if anyone finds that important, but it's fairly obvious by the line "He wasn't in his bedroom. Lewis didn't just slam his head into a desk; his head had been slammed into the [arcade] game."
"Why did he hallucinate a scene from his childhood?" Oh, it's not PTSD, then. It's just the VENTILATION ERROR. lol Okay.
Just a note, as I'm reading through the more action-based stuff, I kind of feel bad for Michael if he had flashbacks like this guy. They're intense.
So, Lewis' voice finally comes out of Springtrap on Pg 213. There's that.
Pg 220 "You can just stay there [in his room]" Kind of a paralell to Midnight Motorist. Lewis is saying it to Hudson. I really feel like the kid in the MM game is Michael because of this story...
Pg 223 "Heat purges. Fire heals." I'm sure that's Henry's life motto.
The ending was stupid, but most in these stories are. Hudson is hallucinating and is implied to have burned himself alive in FF's oven. Meh? The first half of this one is A TRIP and a little insight into what I 100% believe is Michael's childhood. I think the saddest part of it all is that we never got Springtrap speaking to Michael in FNAF 3--and if it's ever remade I hope we get more of them interacting.
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bloodyspade0000 · 4 years ago
Text
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30-day knb challenge: Day 1- Favorite Male character
↳ Haizaki Shougo
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I am not justifying Haizaki's behaviour. I think he needs a tall glass of respect woman juice and therapy. This is just meant to explain why he is my favourite character and help you better understand him as a character. Do not send hate or take my words out of context. You will be reported, deleted and cancelled. Thank you and enjoy. :)
My favourite character is Haizaki Shougo *dodges tomatoes* a lot of people in the fandom hate this guy for many reasons. It's kind of funny how many people hate him and the amount of hate he gets just for existing. Like bruh; he's sixteen, leave him alone. 😂
His whole existence is just sad. He was literally created to be hated.
Like straight up, Tadatoshi Fujimaki even admitted that he hated Haizaki. Haizaki's sole purpose of existing is to make the Generation of Miracles look better even though they’re just as problematic as he. No one is fucking perfect and is about time people woke the fuck up and realized it. Your faves are problematic move the fuck on.
Yes, the Miracles are redeemable but so is Haizaki. Yet, unlike the Miracles, he does not get redeemable. No, he disappears and is never seen again. Like bitch, what the fuck!? if you’re gonna introduce a character to only have them disappear for a long time and either have them show up again or just never mention them again. Wasting the potential they had to be a very good character or not having them redeem themselves while the other characters who were just as fucking problematic get a fucking redemption arc because they’re fucking main characters!? What’s the point of that character even existing in the first place? What kind of bullshit is that? Just to have them exist to make the main characters look good? How the fuck does that make sense? Like where is my Haizaki redemption arc? Do I have to write it on my own? I will write it. I am writing one.
Haizaki is the only character I could relate to. Being second best, struggling to find somewhere to fit in and overshadowed and replaced by someone everyone thinks is better than you. It's fucking depressing, okay? You spend your whole life thinking you’re not good enough, and it hurts. I don't feel like going too deep into it because I don't owe you a detailed explanation of my trauma, okay?. So I'll save that for my fics where I self-project half of it onto Haizaki. It’s a coping mechanism, okay? Therapy is fucking expensive.
The anime ruined his whole character, got rid of his whole arc and shorted it down, and made him worse than he really is.
A post explaining how the anime did him dirty and goes more in-depth about his character
I am not trying to justify his actions, i.e. him manhandling Alex and beating Himura up. He does terrible shit. We all do lousy shit sometimes, but that doesn't make us bad people. Making mistakes is a part of being human, and we're supposed to hold people accountable for their actions and help them realize what they’re doing is wrong, allowing them to grow and change. Not condemn them and ostracize them, which leads to isolation and a lot of psychological trauma and self-hatred, and as someone who has dealt with—is still dealing with all three. It is not fun. It makes living painful. Highly unrecommended.
Haizaki does not have a positive role model in his life nor anybody he can turn to, everyone has already given up on him. Even Nijimura and Kuroko didn’t even try to help him, being more focused on the Miracles. (Yes, I know kuroko tried to stop him from throwing his basketball shoes away, but that doesn’t fucking count because after that Kuroko just gave up on Haiazki too). Haizaki has probably grown grew up knowing only violence and not a single ounce of kindness, turning him into the bitter and angry little boy he is.
Haizaki had so much potential. But instead of making him a great villain that potential was WASTED on fucking Kise.
Also, the Kaijo vs Seirin match in the winter cup was completely useless because Kise already got redeemed and he literally got no character development from it.
And Seirin was gonna fucking win anyways because duh thier the main characters. 🙄
Now some headcanons I think about a lot:
1. He gets abused. Some psychological behavioural consequences of child abuse are unhealthy sexual practices and juvenile delinquency, and Haizaki exhibits all three which are some external behaviours of most (NOT ALL) male abuse victims. Haizaki's a womanizer, aggressive, hostile and violent. Yet, he backs down when someone stronger than him comes around and puts him in his place i.e. Aomine and Nijimura.
a factsheet explaining the long term consequences of child abuse and neglect
How to help a friend dealing with family abuse or neglect
How to Handle Abuse
2. He's a victim. And when you're a victim, you either become angry and cynical with everything and everyone around you, swearing never to be a victim again and struggle with gaining back control of your life. Not wanting anyone to see you being vulnerable because being vulnerable makes you weak. Being weak makes you shatter. You always shatter like glass, cutting yourself every time you pick up broken pieces, watching as blood trickles through your fingers.
Your body is constantly on high alert. The default is flight or fight—survival to the fittest.
Or you bite your lip and keep your head down, bottling everything inside and looking for escapes or seeking validation. You want to be wanted and loved because you struggle with loving and accepting yourself. There's always a voice in the back of your head telling you, you're not good enough or that it's your fault. That everything is your fault. Self-hatred and self-doubt are your tormentors.
Or it's a combination between both—a constant struggle.
And I believe Haizaki portrays both from the way he acts and presents himself. Especially since his motto is literally "Survival of the fittest,” and he had once told Kuroko, " there are bad guys and then the really scary people," or something along those lines, which I believe he is talking from experience. You learn from your experiences. They either make you or break you.
3. He's touch-starved.
What Does It Mean to Be Touch Starved?
4. He's bisexual and has a lot of internalized homophobia. I can just feel his internalized homophobia rolling off of him. Bruh, I just know cuz I am bisexual, and I have struggled with internalized homophobia and still sadly struggle with it cuz I grew up surrounded by homophobic people.
I still live with them. 😭
Also, we live in a society that thinks straight is the default.
What internalized homophobia is.
5. His sexual awakening was probably Aomine or Kise. Could be both 😂?
6. He cries himself to sleep every night.
7. He's observant and a great judge of character. It's a fact. This guy literally predicted the downfall of the Miracles. Straight up warned Kuroko too. Too bad Kuroko didn't listen to him.
8. He's hilarious. When he first appeared in the manga, he literally called Himura a loser, lol. XD
9. He's a closeted softie and a total tsundere.
10. doesn't know how to react to kindness and will think you're threatening him or will feel really awkward and uncomfortable but will cover it up with his scowl, or he'll have a breakdown.
11. needs a lot of reassurance and head pats
12. swears a lot. Has no filter.
13. His bother is in the yakuza or some high position of power, and he feels inferior to him. It also explains why Haizaki gets away with things because he would have been kicked out of school if his bother wasn't either-or. I'm talking about his bother being in the yakuza, lol. XD
14. He and Momoi dated for a while but broke up on a mutual understanding that thier relationship just didn't work out. They're best friends and hang out sometimes.
15. Haizaki's good with kids and just genuinely likes them. He would be a great father and try his best to raise his kids right.
16. He gets sick really easily
17. He's clingy
18. He has no friends, mainly because he doesn't want people to get close to him because he's afraid of getting hurt again. Also, everyone in knb hates him.
19. He watches cartoons cuz he was never allowed to watch them when he was a kid. His childhood is trash, okay?
20. He hides in the closet because that's where he feels safe the most—rhetorically and literally.
21. Sleep-deprived and only runs on caffeine and spite.
List of fics that portray Haizaki better than the anime:
Heavy is the head by extrastellar
Idle Hands by DarkWoods
Another Chance by regretting my username_ (777imou_offline367)
What Matters is that We're Together by StrawFairy
06:00:00 of Haizaki Shougo (4) by ReiClien
This Is Happening by SharkGirl
What is Love by voices_in_my_head
A completely uncalled catharsis by oddball
One-shots
intertwined, under a spell by kornevable
ԼƠƔƐ & ӇΛƬƐ by Arthuria_PenDragon
delirium by extrastellar
me with you by doublejoint
Turn My Camera On by wordsliketeeth
At Summer's End by doublejoint
Taste by Hibari1_san
I Can't Get Enough of You by HisDarkSecret
I don't care if it hurts by llowsywriter
Ashes by doublejoint
broken things by lowsywriter
Series:
Finally found each other by suzakukills
This Is Happening Universe by SharkGirl
DNA by flowerway
My WIPS:
Isn’t it lovely?
Broken Crown
Love me, Love me, Love me
Grey skies
Rabbit hole
A playlist of songs that I believe fit Haizaki
Kuroko’s basketball’s manga
In conclusion, You can hate Haizaki as much as you want. But just keep it to yourself. Haizaki is my baby and I will protect him with my life.
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sword-of-summer · 4 years ago
Note
All of them answer every question fuck you
ahahaha no i respectfully deny your "fuck you" and i accept the ask and so-
i am 5'10", and i don't wish to be taller or shorter- i am the perfect height for hugs and messy hair, and yep, i like it here-
dream pet would be a mix of golden retriver and a husky called Holly and a chonky cat called Loki- yes ofcourse my future kids have names everyone should name their future pets-
ripped jeans/black pants with a Darth Vader tshirt or a Ethnic Fusion Kurta with black sneakers/artificial leather slip-ons, and if it's cold, a black jacket open obviously- and a black wristwatch i love my black wristwatch.
favourite video game was Clash of Clans and going even back, GTA Vice City and, the og- MARIIOOOO
three things/people are Oreos, Nutella and Pizza. The Holy Trinity-
"Beware me my fingers are smeared with chicken popcorn grease"
you didn't mention an opinion, @chunkybirb, so imma give my opinion on Vanilla ice cream and Nutella- ANYONE WHO HADN'T COMBINED THESE TWO COMBINE THESE TWO THEY ARE FUCKING AWESOME
im either phlegmatic or melancholic bruh idk maybe ik or maybe not
im v v v v ticklish
not an allergy, but an intense hatred for ketchup- i vomit if it gets too close to me fuck you ketchup
im heterosexual
any between tea and coffee but full milk coffee (ik, kill me), never had cocoa- but i love a chocolate or nutella milkshake
both. both is good. (cat and dog)
i would be an elf cause hell yeah, knowledge and wisdom
favourite youtuber is Samay Raina, a stand up comedian turned youtuber who is just awesome-
as i mentioned in 1., i am 5'10"
i would not change my name cause it's the coolest fucking name ever, i am Tanay, and Tanay in Hindi means Son, and my parents literally named their son Son, and hell yeah i like it
i forgot how much i weigh- last i checked it was 75 kilos, but ive gained weight since 2019 so yep, gotta walk in the mornings
yes i believe in metaphysicality cause one- it seems cool- second- me and @theclassyghost discussed a metaphysical life theory that i really really like and metaphysicality gives preservation of knowledge so i believe in spirits
SPACE. SPACE. SPACE.
im not that religious, no
pet peeves no well nah not really
nocturnal def nocturnal i sleep at 4.50 anyway hehehehe
fav constellation is Cassiopeia
fav star is Sirius tho
what the fuck are ball jointed dolls
i do have a fear of losing people that's just anxiety i guess
yep, global warming is real
never thought that much about reincarnation tbh but maybe, i do
fav movie is Spider Man : Into The SpiderVerse and Inception and The Dark Knight Rises and Revenge of The Sith and yes, for my indian gang, 3 Idiots and Gully Boy
yep i get scared v v v easily
i have had no pets but i plan to once i grow up
@chunkybirb 's blog is fucking cool awesome and *chef's kiss* a masterpiece
blue calms me. i love blue.
live in Norway cause pretty lights, snow, and less people than this overpopulated country i am in
born in Mumbai, India
v v v dark brown like it's almost black but no it's dark brown
introvert
horoscopes and zodiacs, i do read them, never believed that much tbh-
HUGS I LOVE HUGS
i really wanna visit my brother i haven't met him in a long time i really wanna play cricket w him just like old times
my sister- she's annoying but well i care for her
nah
tattoos idk bruh im okay idk may get one or may not get one
nope, smoking is ewwww *vomits*
ah my crush- she's cool [ if she exists
when the chalk doesn't write on the board but goes iiiiiieeee I HATE THAT
a sound i love is rain pitter pattering i just hhhhhh sends me into happiness
nope fatass here
nope fatass here
favourite actors have to be eddie redmayne, oscar issac and pedro pascal- and margot robbie and winona ryder in the actresses section also yes, elliot page
bruh already answered in 30.
im okayish!! spotify and tumblr, cool combo-
my hair are okay being black for me
yesterday, monday, from 6.40 to 6.50
music
uhhh naah not that i know of
well in Rick Riordan's Magnus Chase books, the sword of Frey aka Sumarbrander TALKS and demands to be called Jack, so here i am
bakwaas, music and comfy
yep, i believe in evolution
unfollow on hate and when they dm me sending nsfw pics ugh why are people like that
follow, well, i like people and they seem cool, so i follow them
fav kind of person is the one who'll sit with me for hours not even talking and just vibing to music
fav animals are beavers, doggos and cats
three fav blogs are @chunkybirb, @theclassyghost, @little-boats-on-a-lake, @aredhel-of-gondolin, @sue-me-imbadass, @alleenkaas, @my-ackerman, @brrrrrrrrrrzone
fav emoticon has to be ☹ this me seeing my stupidity outrank others
fav meme has to be Butternut is a master of psychological manipulation
INTP
Libraaa let's go
no dog, i have
black darth vader tshirt, black pants, black sneakers and black wrist watch
i have no selfies my phone has no cameras i live in eternal darkness
what the fuck are platform shoes
i, uhhh, i remember weird things like what i drew in class in 3rd while i was supposed to be doing english
lazy ass here, no front flips possible
i like birds they fly
nope i don't Iike swimming i like blankets
wrapped up in blankets reading books sounds better than both
ketchup
hyperspace travel
nope none
reading writing eating sleeping
my friend
tumblr seems cool
i have around 60-70 idk
yes i can run but why
yes they do but what's the fun in that
nope I'd fall over
sapphire let's go
koala bear or panda
sunflower or the one on a lemon tree
ketchup store
one cup of coffee is enough, tysm
read minds that sounds cool cool yeaaahh
nope never wore it a black clothes guy here BatMan
winter winter all year long
i don't know and i don't wanna try
i don't know and i don't wanna know
everyone cause they are better than me
bookstores cause bookstores any bookstores
sneakers, black onez
apparently some gas bitches mixed up to form a planet
non vegetarian but i partake meat just twice or thrice in two weeks
i don't know they don't seem like liking
naaaaaaaah
bugs ew
spiders ew
about the fact that i come off as arrogant and overconfident while in reality it's just that my communication skills suck
i can draw averagely whenever im in a mood
this thing im answering but i like answering it
uhhhhhhh brain freeze- idk bruh questions are good they give knowledge
yep, while sleeping
ahh yes calming, they are
cloudy days cause fucking cool vibes
hehehe wouldn't you like to know, weatherboy
CumuloNimbus i really like it's name yknow nimBUS
dark blue, dark blue always or black
naaaah no freckles
fav thing is when they laugh and it's just happy and we're both laughing like shitheads but who cares we're rebelling against depressing life and we laugh
both. both is good [ fruits and vegetables
sleep but i have to answer 170 questions cause @chunkybirb
sky sky sky it's my blog's header duh uh sKy
sweet and sour candy. SWEET AND SOUR CANDY.
dim lights it makes me feel cool
ahhh so here we go- Mooncalfs, Thunderbirds, Phoenixes, Sphinxes, Dragons that seem to be Space Nebulae, and more and more and more
i really feel like a boomer sometimes
i love everything about this site/app it makes me feel happy cause i like the people and the posts
uhhhhh i think too much about everything cause i just do. i like thinking
"He's dead, guys. For the sake of The Force, please watch Star Wars now he wanted to discuss it with you" actually no i would just say "A big shoutout to Garlic Bread he loved Garlic Bread"
myself cause i should be sleeping but sleep is for the weak and i am the weak and the strong i am a paradox-
that i obsess too much on things and try involving people it never works out
nope. had braces for 4 years, that beat out teeth showing smiles
i prefer computer-tv ahahahahaha
never tried them, so IDK
naaaaah not motion sickness- never travelled by sea so idk seasickness
lobed ears
yep i believe that deeds do count in life and beyond
idk bruh i don't believe in physical attraction too much- bodies are fake- mentally/metaphysically tho, im a 7
ahhhhh many many Stupid Genius, Tani, Tanu, Tanya
i still do-
i really want to talk to a therapist. converse. and discover.
im both, i am both.
10:1 is the ratio- giving 10, receiving 1
uhhh nothing just when i am right and people use the old "disrespect" argument
3, Hindi, Marathi, English
girls
uhh no i am not
my hair i love them everyone says things about my hair but i love them
knowledge vibes i give, someone tells me- and that's all i ever wanted
anyone i know tbh, my mutuals, my friends, my discord friends
ahhh no i wouldn't but i wish i was born 20 years earlier
bleh bloo, neither like nor dislike
i don't know if i have one
i don't know, haven't had physical contact in a long long long time in a galaxy far far away
the above point stands but i would like to ig
anything i write, 3 hours later, i instantly hate just idk why
anything i write
that i am normal no i am not and i am not okay hahahahaha
65-70 ish people
somewhere around-
many many many don't ask please but okay if you do ask
somewhat
uhhhhh idr exactly but i won't tell in public duh uh
mediummm hairrrr
last year lockdown i became harry potter
i don't know buddy i seriously don't know
yep i do cause knowledge i like knowledge
naaah never tried
no i definitely cannot stand on my hands or my head for more than 30 seconds
yep, im pretty sure i answered most of them correctly-
og link-
16 notes · View notes
leverage-ot3 · 4 years ago
Text
notable moments from The Bank Shot Job
leverage 1.05
I decided I’m also going to start highlighting meta material in these posts for reference reasons (like for fics, headcanons, meta, etc)
I’m colorcoading by what character the meta pertains to btw
Clerk: Hello, Judge Roy.
Judge Roy: [slaps her ass] Hey, sweetheart.
Frank: Can I help you, your honor?
Judge Roy: Yes, Fred. Her phone number?
Frank: It's Frank. And she's 19, sir.
Judge Roy: That's too bad. She got a younger sister
diSgUsTiNG
- - - - -
Hardison: No. No more. We gotta talk to Nate. No more rip deals. They take too damn long.
Parker (ripping paper): That's why they're called "Rip Deals". You have to convince them they're getting a deal before you can rip them off.
Hardison: Two weeks. Two weeks sleeping in crappy hotels. Two weeks eating in crappy diners. Two weeks having my soul sucked dry. It's 107 degrees. Who lives where it's 107 degrees?
Parker: Juan's not so bad. I kinda like this town
I wanna see that domestic shit of them sharing hotel rooms and eating the continental breakfasts and dingy diners and everything about them living in rundown hotels for two weeks
- - - - -
Hardison: You know, I had to retask two satellites just to get a lousy internet connection. Took more than an hour to torrent the last episode of Doctor Who.
Parker: Hey! Illegal downloading's wrong. (lights paper on fire in trash can)
that’s it. that’s their relationship.
- - - - -
Hardison: How we coming on the breakdown?
Eliot (loading truck elsewhere): Fake addresses are shut down. Post office boxes are closed. The phones are cleared. Five more minutes, we never existed
bruh those props ??? I wish I had a screenshot but wtf where they DOING for the con ???
- - - - -
Hardison: Want me to call the Delgado family, tell them the news?
Eliot: Nah. Soon as I clear county line I want to do it. I just wish we could do more than bankrupt that corrupt son of a bitch
eliot is so good you guys im-
- - - - -
Nate: Get out. Now.
Hardison: Is he talking to us?
Parker: An unmarked van parked across the street from a bank that's being robbed? Yeah. I think he's talking to us.
Hardison: Yeah, well, five more feet and he would have been in the clear. What the hell was he thinking?
Parker: Don't be an idiot, Hardison.
Hardison: What?
Parker: Sophie was still in there
parker knows nate loves sophie and would never leave her behind because she may not always get people, but even she can see how much nate cares for sophie
- - - - -
Derrick: Everyone empty your pockets. Wallets, purses, watches, everything you've got, throw it over here.
(everyone throwing stuff to center of floor)
nate threw his fucking toothpick
- - - - -
Deputy Arnold: No, right here, right here, and we need ...
(Eliot crosses police line)
Deputy Arnold: Whoa, whoa, I need you to take a step back, sir.
Eliot: Tell me what's going on in there.
Deputy Arnold: I'm afraid I can't do that, this is an active crime scene, and you need to ...
Eliot: (to cop) I'm not talking to you. (to Nate) How many are there?
Nate: Yeah, you're right. Clearly amateurs, these two. Yeah. The younger one, looks like he's never handled a gun before.
Eliot: Is judge blow-hard next to you?
Nate: Yeah, uh-huh. Yeah, definitely amateurs, That's what makes them so dangerous.
Eliot: Alright, 2 guys, both armed, neither one a criminal mastermind. You want me in there?
Deputy Arnold: Sir, we can't have you going inside the bank ...
Nate: Probably, uh, a good idea just to sit tight, don't you think? You know, and see where these guys' heads are
at, you know?
Eliot (backing away): Alright, your call boss.
Deputy Arnold: Thank you
poor deputy arnold + eliot being done with local law enforcement
- - - - -
Sophie: Okay. So what is the plan, Stan
“what’s the plan, stan” adorable.
- - - - -
(Eliot leans against a building across the street and watches Hardison and Parker pull up in a sedan)
Eliot: Nice ride.
Parker (taking notebook and removing badges): It's embarrassing. Everyone knows you don't rob a bank without an exit strategy. These two deserve to get caught. 42 seconds. (tosses notebook back to Eliot)
Hardison: What?
Parker: To rob this bank. One security guard who has never fired his gun before, 2 closed-circiut cameras outside, 1 inside, and a Glen-Reader safe built in the 50's whose default combination is the birth date of the manager's wife! Get in, get out, 42 seconds.
Hardison: Seriously
parker was so angry that she chucked the binder at eliot and he was like ??? we good ???
- - - - -
Hardison: Seriously? (to Bill) I'm Agent Leonard. This is Agent Elmore. We'll be taking over this crime scene,
Sheriff ...
Bill: Bill Hastings. Nice to meet you. You guys sure are quick, just called this in 20 minutes ago.
Hardison: Well, we were coming back from a little border skirmish. Patrol unit came under attack from a pack of Chupacabras.
Bill: Chupacabras? I thought those things were urban legend.
Hardison: You're adorable
I love it when hardison fucks with people it’s hilarious
- - - - -
Hardison: Whoa, what's going on?
Bill: Cut power to the bank. Standard operating procedure.
Hardison: Standard ... it's standard op ... it's standard? Where do you getting that bull-hockey from son?
Bill: Deputy Arnold, he took a seminar in crisis management last year.
Deputy Arnold: It was an online seminar. We got certificates.
Hardison: Certificates? Magic kits come with certificates. Does that make it cool for kids to saw their parents in half?
Bill: We're just going by the book.
Hardison: The ... the book? The book got a good man killed. I can't ... my blood pressure.
Parker: Ex-partner. Probably shouldn't mention the book again. Or propellers.
parker is doing so well with grifting considering and I’m so proud of her
- - - - -
Sophie: They are not cops, I promise you, they're friends of mine, you can trust them.
Derrick: Why should I trust you? I don't know who you are.
Sophie: I am a thief.
Derrick: Okay, I'm not sure what to do with that.
that’s it guys. that’s the show.
- - - - -
Nate: I didn't say it was going to be easy. But nothing's impossible, especially when you have the world's greatest thief on your payroll. Parker, have you ever robbed a bank that's being robbed?
Parker: There's a first time for everything.
her SMILE YOUR HONOR
- - - - -
Parker: The bank was built before 1980, before computers. Means it's got a larger than normal night deposit chute.
Hardison: 'Cause business had to drop off ledgers with their daily hauls. What, you thought my genius was only limited to ones and zeroes?
Parker: I'm thinking the chute's my way in. Only problem is, it's in the alley on this side of the building
the way she looks at hardison like damn boy you know my stuff
- - - - -
Hardison: I can take care of that, but, we actually have bigger problems.
Eliot: What's that?
Hardison: Well, Sheriff Coltrane over here called the FBI, the real FBI. Now the closes office is in San Diego, so they should be here, in about, um, give it 45 minutes.
Nate: We can't worry about that now.
Hardison: When do we worry about it?
Nate: In about 45 minutes
hardison, internally: lord give me strength
- - - - -
Hardison: Hold on ... Excuse me. (answers phone) Agent Leonard. We will do whatever you need us to do, just please, don't hurt anybody. Okay. (hangs up) Guys ... Boys, boys, come on, gather 'round. Now boys, that was THE call. The call we were waiting for. Now look, they have a list of demands. First off, they want 12 large pizzas. One cheese, one Hawaiian, extra pineapple. Two pepperoni and black olives, two meat lover's, t ... Seriously? Nobody's writing this down? Seriously? One triple-shot half-caf vanilla latte, tall,
(Parker goes down alley and opens deposit drop box)
Hardison: …three of the latest copies of the Hall and Oates CD. I know, right? Exciting stuff I didn't know they were coming out with a new one either. We're gonna need steaks. Steaks and a grill. They're trying to tailgate. Okay, they need your overalls, I don't know why. They need some kibbles n' bits, we need an Etch-A-Sketch, somebody in there likes to squiggle okay ... Are we good? Let's go people. Everybody. I need you guys moving. Everybody get out. Go. (hardison points at an officer) You stay. We need to talk about Hall & Oates.
I fucking loved this monologue,,, hardison is VERY GOOD at improvising
- - - - -
(Derrick opens night deposit box)
Parker: Hi.
Derrick (hands her the briefcase): There's a lot of money in there.
Parker: Yeah, I know.
Derrick: My wife's life depends on that money getting where it needs to go.
Parker: I understand. Sometimes bad guys are the only good guys you get
parker’s face softened and you can see that she understood. parker didn’t get people in the beginning of the show, and sure her values and ideas aren’t typical, but she was ALWAYS a good person. she cared and understood what was at risk and she consoled him.
also, this is yet another piece of evidence that parker was the main character all along!!! I’m not gonna go super into it because there are already posts out there about it, but she had three (3) episodes dedicated to her character in season one alone AND had her say what is basically the mission statement of the show here in this scene
- - - - -
Sophie: Things could be worse.
Nate: Worse than me getting shot and you blowing our cover?
Sophie: No, no, you're not gonna lay that crap on me. We wouldn't even be in this mess if you'd just walked out with the cash when you had the chance. I would've been fine.
Nate: I know.
Sophie: Yeah, I can take care of myself. I've been doing it a long time. Since way before I met you. I'm just saying.
Nate: Yeah, you're right.
Sophie: Okay
nate knows sophie is a strong independent woman and that is one of the only things I stan about him lol
- - - - -
Sophie: We lost communication.
Nate: Yeah, we did.
Sophie: Hardison, Parker, and Eliot ...
Nate: That's right, they are on their own. Yup.
they ended up doing great on their own, but also, can we acknowledge what a glow up it was building up to the rundown job ???
- - - - -
(Mom gets out of truck and tries to run)
Meth #2: Where the hell you think you're going, old lady? (pulls mom back) Where the hell you think you're g ...
Eliot (catches Meth #2’s arm): Hey, what smells like crank and screams like a girl? (Takes his gun and breaks his knee)
Meth #2: AAHH!
Eliot (kicks car door closed before Meth #3 can get out, empties the bullets from gun): That's the right answer. (throws gun into car at #3, hits #1 as he approaches) Come on. (fights #1, kicks door shut, beats #1 more, kicks door again) Stay in the car. (beats the hell out of #3 and #1, kneels down near mom and removes her gag)
Mom: Who are you?
Eliot: Well ma'am, we'd be the cavalry.
this entire fight scene always has me ROLLING it’s so funny
also I’m not sure if this should go on the List Of Non-Weapon Objects Eliot Uses As Weapons but eliot DID use the car door in the fight
- - - - -
Sophie: Just let the paramedics take him. The rest of us will stay.
Judge Roy: And give up my leverage
*sophie and nate look at each other*
both, internally: tHATS OUR WORD
- - - - -
Nate: Hey, listen. She's gonna be alright. Everything's gonna be alright
Derrick: Your people ... they're good?
Nate: Yeah. The best.
nate’s smile when he says that??? proud dad alert
- - - - -
Sophie (looking at replay of tape): You're still a geek.
Judge Roy: They're trying to ruin me.
Hardison: Geek power, baby. Stay strong!
in other words: age of the geek, baby
also- kudos to 2008 hardison editing video like that. I can’t do that shit with today’s tech lmao
- - - - -
Bill: Go home now. Bank robbers are in custody, hostages are safe. FBI's got the whole thing wrapped up.
Taggert: Do you have any idea what?
Mcsweeten: Just go with it.
Deputy Arnold: Mr. FBI guys, can you help me here?
Bill: My, my. Look at this. Our local drug boys, both with outstanding warrants. It's incredible.
Taggert: Damn, we're good!
mcsweeten and taggert stumbling onto the leverage crew’s cons and directly profiting off of them is iconic. they have no idea. too pure for this world
- - - - -
Sophie: Hey, thanks Parker.
Parker: Whatever.
Sophie: No. It was an excellent performance.
Parker: Yeah, I think I can act okay when I'm yelling at people and bossing them around.
Sophie: Well, it's a good start.
proud mom!sophie + grifting parker
Nate: Listen, we have to make sure we get the cash to the Delgado family. Ow!
Eliot (tending Nate’s wound): Oh! Settle down. You act like you've never been shot before.
Nate (glances at Sophie): So, uh, pizza boxes, huh?
Hardison: Yeah, I know, I know, You could have done better.
Nate: No, no, no. No I couldn't have.
eliot casually stitching up nate’s wound bc no hospitals but also can we talk about how much nate has to trust eliot to literally operate on him
+
nate giving praise to hardison ??? rare af I don’t know her
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lady-maria-the-wolf225 · 4 years ago
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Mikey x Fem! reader ch: 2 & 3 (combined)
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(Y/N) had no idea who that stranger was. Despite the dangers ahead, she doesn't care much about that. She couldn't stop thinking about those hands however. She has never seen anyone with three fingers in her whole life. Other than that, she wants answers. With a boost of confidence, instead of going home, staying out late should be a breeze. In her opinion to be exact. It was the next morning, and she grabbed some extra food and soda to help her stay up all night as much as possible. School is the same as yesterday. Thankfully she wasn't given any homework today either. She met up with her friends at an after school club and hopes she doesn't forget what she has to do afterwards. After the club has ended, it's time for her to find the mystery stranger.
(Y/N)'s P.O.V
I was walking around trying to find the figure. It was very quiet as usual. There was no sign of anything....nothing. Just myself. I sighed thinking to myself if I would just give up, but I chose not to. I kept on walking far and wide into the streets. That is until I found it. The figure.....it was standing before me. But why? Whatever it may be, I do feel a bit uneasy. Without saying a word, the figure runs off quickly. I decided to follow it. I ran to its direction as fast as I could. When It got to a corner of a random street, it stopped. I hid in a corner of a wall that way it won't see me. I waited for the figure to make its move. That's when it jumped into a sewer. "A sewer? B-but why would- *sigh*. Who am I kidding?" I walked towards the sewer area. I know I couldn't get in that way because the lid itself is too heavy to lift. I looked around to see if there may be a second entrance to it. And I did. There was a rectangular hole that seemed big enough for me to squeeze in. I took off my backpack, and managed to enter. I grabbed my bag, and started to walk into the sewer line. It was really dark so I had to take out my phone to turn on the flashlight. I kept on walking until I fell into a slide like area. I was sliding downward screaming but laughing at the same time. It was kinda fun, it almost felt like one of those water slides you go on in a local water park. I landed on my ass which kinda hurt. "Ouch!" I rubbed it, and got up immediately. There are so many sewer pipes, I couldn't figure out where the figure may be, so I decided to go straight. It was a long path to get through. Just as I felt like I may be close, I heard footsteps. No. more than just footsteps. A skateboard too? I started to panic a bit but managed to find a sewer pipe large enough for my tiny body to fit. I hid in there, and waited for whoever was coming straight ahead. What I saw, made me wonder. There was.....four creatures running passed me. "Hey guys! Wait up!" said the fourth mysterious figure trying to get its skateboard running. What's weird, is that it has rockets on it. Plus, I can't even see the person at all. Just a silhouette. "Come on Mikey! We got some foot clan butt to kick!" another one said in the distance "okay okay! Calm down Raph! It's not the end of the world you know!" it rode away with the others and the sound soon went to silence. I slowly got out, and decided to keep walking "that was.....Fucking weird." I said to myself trying to figure out who those people were. I walked a couple more steps until I found this strange looking door. Well technically it's not a door per say. I noticed it was slightly opened. I looked back for a quick moment to see if no one else was around. The coast is clear thank god. I slowly opened the strange yet mysterious entrance, and revealed some kind of lair. It's weird that a lair is located in a sewer. I also noticed The height of the entrance from here all the way to the ground does seem a little high. So basically I had to jump down like as if i'm in an action movie. I took a deep breath and counted to three. "one.....two.....Three!" I jumped and managed to land on my backpack since it's on my back obviously. I got up and stared at the place. "Woah!...." I walked around, and it had crazy technology, bedrooms, exercise weights, and a ramp for I'm guessing skateboard tricks like the ones you see at a local park. I looked around and noticed there was a sleeping rat in one of the rooms. A huge rat to be exact. I almost made a single sound after it scared me. But thankfully my words were stuck down to my throat. I sighed in relief that it didn't wake up at all. Guess it's a heavy sleeper. I walked around some more, and the bedrooms have doors. The same exact shape as the one where I entered the place. I entered one of them and noticed a small TV with a PS2 and DVD player sitting there. The room was kind of a mess too. It was littered with pizza boxes and candy wrappers. Gross. In the corner of the room, there was a mini fridge with a pack of Orange Crush Soda hidden in the back of it. After taking a look at that, I checked at the condition of the TV and PS2. surprisingly, they were in good shape. Even the DVD player is too. The TV is an early 2000s model. Old, but still good. I turned both of them on, and they work. "Oh. neat" I smiled a bit and I made the decision to play with it. I slowly and quietly closed the strange door, and took out one of my old games I always played in my childhood. "I haven't played Sonic Unleashed in a while. Might as well go ahead and play for a bit." I turned down the volume as low as possible so I didn't wake up the strange rat, and started playing. An hour in a half passed, and I started to get tired. Although I did eat a few of my snacks and since I ran out of drinks I ended up drinking some of the orange crush soda from the back of the mini fridge, I kept on yawning. Since I'm too lazy to head home, I might as well just spend the night here. I paused the game, and ended up falling asleep on the nice bed. It's kinda nice here. Quiet, no interruptions, a nice spot to play some games and have some time for myself. I just hope nothing goes wrong at all.
end of P.O.V The Mysterious heroes who are actually turtles have returned home to the sewers and one of them spoke. "Sensei! We're back!" the rat was meditating and no longer sleeping. "Where have you four been?" The turtle with the blue bandana named Leonardo spoke "we had another foot clan attack. We managed to stop them on time." The rat sighed. "Did anyone see you? Anyone at all?" they all shook their heads. "No Sensei. We got away as quickly as we could." The rat nodded and responded. "Good. you may all rest now my sons. We have a big day tomorrow." they all looked at each other. "What day is it?" Leonardo asked. "Training day." they all groaned and the rat chuckles. "Now go. I must concentrate." they all went to their rightful rooms and the youngest of the four named Michelangelo stretched his arms and fiddled with his orange bandana. "I'm gonna go on ahead and play me some video games!" as he got to his room, he noticed the TV was on along with the game system. "Huh? Hey wait a second! I don't remember playing this game at all!" He removes the game disc from the system, and yells out to one of his brothers. "Raph! Were you messing with my game system again!? And where did you get this game!? Did you rent it or something!?" The red bandana turtle named Raphael comes into the room. "What? No! What are you talking about? Lemme see that!" he takes the game disc from him and takes a look at it. "You serious? Do I look like the kind of guy who likes playing as a blue furry that runs like the flash?" Mikey stares at him in an irritating way as his own brother tosses the game disc across the room. He looks down and notices the empty cans of soda on the floor and looks back up at Raph. Raph himself was now getting angry. "You hid a stack of orange crush soda from me without even telling me!?" Mikey starts to get angry too. "Yes I did! And don't lie to me! I know YOU found them, and did this for a good laugh!" Mikey and Raph argue back and forth until they stopped when they notice movement in Mikey's bed. "What was that?...." Raph pushes him out of the way, and takes out one of his weapons. "Stand back." He grabs the sheets, and snatches them out of the way and sees (Y/N) sleeping. They both stood back as Raph dropped his weapon in complete shock. "How- what-.....where-?....oh god there's a g- a gi-..." he couldn't speak and they both looked at each other and ran out of the room in a panic. "Donnie! Leo!" they both yelled as the other two were busy doing their thing. "What? What happened?" Donatello said as he adjusted his glasses and purple bandana. "There's a g-girl in my room! And a- and uh R-Raph almost killed her on my own bed! And-" Donnie stopped Mikey. "woah woah woah! Slow down! You're saying there's a girl in your room?" Mikey nodded frantically. Leo shows up eventually and spoke to them. "what are they talking about?" Donnie responds to him with a sigh. "it appears they saw a human girl in Mikey's bed." Leo looks at them and takes a deep breathe "show me. Now!" they take them to the bed, and see (Y/N) still asleep. They all looked at her and Donnie started analyzing her. "Okay. according to my analysis, she is 18 years of age, 5'0 feet tall, 125 pounds, (H/C), (E/C), and somehow it shows me her uhh.....cup size. They're quite an impressive size for a young adult if you ask me. Wish it didn't scan them though." the other three's eyes lit up when they heard that word "cup size huh? What is that?" Mikey asked. Donnie whispers to them what cup sizes are, and they widened their eyes in surprise. Mikey blushes bright red. "Aaaaand I am now questioning my own innocence, thank you very much." Raph smirks giving his younger brother a noogie "all right Mikey! Our own little bro's first lesson in becoming a man! Woo!" Mikey playfully pushes him off shaking his head smiling. "tch. whatever bruh." Donnie finishes analyzing, and looks at Leo. "what shall we do?" Leo looks at the girl and sighs "well uhhh-" Mikey interrupts him jumping up and down excitedly "Can we keep her? I promise to take good care of her! please?" Raph and Donnie facepalms, and Leo looks at Mikey with a long pause, then proceeds to speak. "We'll might as well let her stay for the night. But we're taking her back home tomorrow!" Mikey squeals excitedly "Yes!" Leo then talks again "and one more thing! If Master Splinter finds out, we gotta tell the truth. But first when she wakes up, we gotta know how she got here. First thing in the morning before our training day starts. Got it?" Mikey nods. "Oh yeah! Totally. Yeah...." Leo nods. "Good. come on guys. We gotta go to bed. Sensei wants tomorrow to be on point. That goes for you too Mikey!" Mikey nods with a smile on his face "aye aye captain boss bro!" Raph looks at Mikey who is staring at (Y/N) "she's really pretty man." Raph nods "yeah. Never seen a girl like her before. Hopefully when she wakes up, we can have a nice chat with her." Mikey nods. "What about April? She's pretty too." Raph chuckles shaking his head "nah. She's too bland. Maybe this one may be a keeper." he winks with a daring smile. Mikey chuckles and Raph pats him on the back. "Well it's getting late. Night Mikey. See ya in the morning." Mikey looks at his brother as Raph leaves the room. "Night bro." Mikey decides to sleep on the floor and hopes this girl may be the one for him. Despite that, in his heart, he can feel it beating like a steady drum right now which means it's love at first sight for him. TO BE CONTINUED!....chapter 4 and 5 are next soon! :)
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gothwarlocks · 4 years ago
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30 Questions
Tagged by: @thedinalixlegacy and @shanfamilydrama thank you both!! 🙈💖💖
Rules: Answer 30 questions and tag 5 blogs you are contractually obligated to know better.
Name/Nickname: Julian / Jules
Gender: Male
Star sign: Leo (sun & moon lol; Sag rising)
Height: 5′6″
Birthday: August 6th
Time: 5:20PM
Favorite bands: (at the moment) uhhhh Kanga and Led Zeppelin. if we’re talking fav or all-time, I have too many to count :(
Favorite solo artists: it’s a tossup between several people but I would have to say David Bowie. seeing Ziggy at a young age really did help transgenderfy my brain 😌
Song stuck in my head: I’ve mentioned her already but Dissonance by Kanga is a fucking bop and I’m obsessed with her music at the moment 🙄
Last movie: If you want the dignified answer I rewatched Dune (1984) last week (I still love it v much). But the honest answer is I’m a dumb stoner and watched Beavis & Butt-head Do America a couple nights ago lol.
Last show: Uh still Twin Peaks season 3 I think. My roommates and I finished the whole series right around new year’s.
When did I create this blog: February 2019! I had no idea if I’d even use it much though, so I didn’t really start interacting with people until last spring lol.
What do I post: mostly swtor and wow, sometimes other stuff (but I try to keep it on my main blog)
Last thing I googled: “worst sun moon sign combination” 😐
Other blogs: my main blog which I’ll give out to anyone interested, but you gotta dm me lol. I’ve had it since 2011 and oh god it sucks having the power to look back on what you were interested in/saying at like 15/16 lmao.
Do I get asks: yeah thanks to all you cool people!! I love doing ask memes/games :’)
Why I chose my url: originally to poke fun at myself for my 2 mains in WoW both being warlocks (and gay). now it just sounds fun to me so I’m having trouble changing it haha.
Following: 133
Followers: 86 which is WILD hello
Average hours of sleep: 6 but there is no average really lol
Lucky number: i dunno!
Instruments:  I was trained fairly well in piano as a child but honestly I haven’t touched an instrument in like a decade. I do own a guitar and want to push myself to learn it if even a little eventually.
What am I wearing: hoodie, sweats, warm socks.
Dream job: I really don’t know anymore lol. I had several goals that fell through over the last few years so I’m honestly kind of stuck on this question at the moment. I do love museums though (science or art-centered), so if I ever get to work in one in some way that’d be very nice. I’ll figure it out.
Dream trip: somewhere tropical and right on the beach, maybe a month-long with nothing in particular to do lol.
Favorite food: soup.. I love soups so much... most underrated food..
Nationality: American 😔
Favorite song: I’d never be able to pick a favorite omg. There’s a lot of 80′s classics that would count I guess, but I’m corny so I’ll go with a song from my teens years. Amesoeurs by Amesoeurs 🖤
Last book read: bruh I didn’t read shit in 2020 <3 anyway I PLAN to read the Hellboy comics next.
Top three fictional universes I’d like to live in:
Star Wars (on Coruscant? maybe..? 😂)
LOTR, specifically the Shire, Middle-earth. lol I think this is the best answer.
put me in mf Suramar City a couple thousand years before Legion goes down
Tagging: @raven-of-domain-kwaad @clonethoughts @nhylluan @palepinkycat @blueburds if any of your would like to :)
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cursewoodrecap · 3 years ago
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Session 23: Medical Ethics
Y’all ever been to college?
Our new friend Vigdor has just pulled a pale, twitching human leg out of a poster tube, sheepishly admitting to Valeria that it’s his own.
Valeria blinks at it. “Well, it doesn’t appear to be bleeding demons, so that’s good?”
Shoshana sticks her head in the door, and has to pause to take in the sight. “Uh, bruh? Bruh? I have questions. Is that yours? I mean, like, yes, you HAVE it, but was it attached to-“
“That’s a bit tricky? It was amputated twice.”
“Twice?!”
“Once from me, and then, well, um. Once from an amalgam of sewn together body parts?”
(Gral and Shoshana pile into the room, because Oh, Lore?)
“When I was in the swamp, we were fighting a bunch of zombies led by this particularly nasty undead guy. We called it the Wailing Wight. At first it was just the usual undead hordes, but then a local leatherworker was found, torn apart and harpooned every which way, half his limbs torn off and stolen. After that, we started getting attacked by stitched together abominations cobbled together from human and animal pieces. I was there just trying to help the villagers, being a doctor and all. But that’s when I lost my actual limbs.”
“They got stolen, like the leatherworker’s?”
“I had to chop them off. Which, for the record, is not a fun time? The Wight’s harpoon has a kind of poison that rots everything it touches. So I had to amputate or, like, die. So I cut them off and his zombies, uh, stole them. And I managed to get one back? Kind of a long story. I don’t know how I recognized it, but – I guess I know my own leg like the back of my hand? Now I’m taking it back to Sturmhearst. There’s a weird fluid inside it; I want to study what’s going on with that so we can take care of the nastyboy in the swamp.”
“Well, I am generally against nastyboys,” says Shoshana, poking his foot in the ticklish bit. It squirms at her.
We’re headed to Sturmhearst anyway, so traveling together seems reasonable. We think about taking Fun Key Shortcuts, but that could backfire spectacularly, so we’ll play it safe and go the normal, boring way.
In the morning, we head downstairs. The inn is trashed. The stalwart barkeep Rene is not there; instead there’s a young elf sweeping out what debris he can. As we grab breakfast and the young fellow thanks us over and over for saving his friend’s life, Vigdor awkwardly wanders around casting Mending on chairs and tables that got a little too close to the tentacles and chainsaws. Shoshana doesn’t really do non-destructive magic, but she slips the barkeep some gold for repairs.
Vigdor’s too lopsided for a horse, so he’s gonna hop on in our cart. He’s very taken with the Eyegis, poking at it with fascination. “You can see the blood vessels in the eyes, despite no source for a blood supply! Do they have tear ducts? Have you ever seen the shield produce tears? Can you make it cry?”
Valeria gets very uncomfortable with this line of questioning and turns the eyes back into painted ones, put off by a Weird Stranger gettin’ all up in her business. Gral distracts him by asking about his fancy metal limbs.
Vigdor goes full technobabble on how the runes and machinery work. “Well, there’s three different kind of magical actuators on each joint, and they act as conduits for the dilithium crystals-” He knows the details secondhand from Bjork and none of us speak robotics, so if he ever needs serious repairs he’ll have to bring them back to Sturmhearst for the engineers to take a look at.
Valeria knows a bit about Jotunn runesmithing, but she’s never heard of it working to this degree of precision; before, she’d only heard of stuff like boats that row themselves, or a peg leg that has a little extra articulation. These are fully actuated limbs!
Val checks if the limbs are the same metal as our space wrench, but nope, they look like completely normal everyday metals. She’s not gonna inspect further, because she has RESPECT, unlike SOME people.
(“Hey, I didn’t try to pry the eyes open or anything!” Vigdor protests.)
She does notice one thing, though: Valeria recognizes runes from most magic systems even though she doesn’t know them well enough to use; her sister studied magic for a long time, so she knows what they look like. There’s one elaborate rune that appears on both Vigdor’s forearm and leg that is of no origin she’s ever seen.  
“How long’d it take Bjork to build this thing?” Shoshana asks, squinting at Vigdor’s kneecap.
“Well, I was unconscious for a good bit of it so…between a week and 2 months? He was already working on it when I, uh, had to amputate.”
“…did you KNOW you were gonna wake up with those things on?”
“Oh! Yeah, yeah. It took a while ‘cause the original blueprints they found were for somebody, like…really short for a human or really tall for a halfling? Something in between. Bjork had to resize the whole model to fit a human.”
“He, uh, FOUND blueprints?
“I can’t imagine he’d have made blueprints for a person who didn’t exist? It was all proportioned very strangely. I don’t know too much about it, you’d have to ask Professor Bjork.”
(One of the players asks if the strange rune, perhaps, says ISTC in a language the characters don’t know. It DOES, and we’re all very pleased with ourselves for previous-campaign references.)
The long road stretches on before us, and we have plenty of time to talk as we spend a week or two heading north toward the coast. We fill Vigdor in on the four flavors of Curse and the concept of the Prisoners, and that we suspect there’s major Key nonsense going on up at the university. (Heh heh, “major key.”)
Vigdor and Shoshana bond over being locals. Why are foreigners so weird about trolls?
Vigdor really, really wants to look at Twombly’s glasses. We explain to him that the Key could take his desire for knowledge and turn him into a cackling, dimension-hopping madman with a few extra eyeballs. He still wants to play with the glasses. Valeria protectively hides the Key map, just in case, flashing her Hunt fangs at anyone who asks about it.
After like a week of pestering everybody, Vigdor gets to look at the glasses. Disappointingly, when not looking at the Key map, the colorful lenses just make everything look slightly more those colors. Maybe Gral’s lutestrings look weird, but that could be the placebo effect. He tries flipping around the many lenses in different combinations, and finds that all of them make him look absolutely ridiculous.
Eventually after many days of travel, we can smell the ocean and the distinctive stench of a large number of humans living in one place. Vigdor takes in the familiar sight of his college hometown. Shoshana is dumbfounded that this many people can live on top of each other, while Valeria thinks it’s a quaint little town.
Up to the west, Sturm Castle squats on a cliff above the city, like a big hippo of knowledge. It looks like it was once a reasonable castle shape, but it’s had new wings and towers built onto it haphazardly until it’s a weird sprawling network of jammed-together architecture. By the edge of the cliff, in one of the more sensibly-built sections, a majestic lighthouse beams out over the bay. In the city below, the largest building appears to be a grand temple, with its roof carved in the shape of an open book. The perimeter of the city is outlined by strange wooden and metal towers, two or three stories tall with conical brass roofs.
Eh. It’s only got one castle, so it can’t be that good of a city compared to Aurentium.
Our cart is briefly stopped for a quick examination at the gate by a friendly city guardsman. He’s flanked by two of the same enormous owl-masked guards we saw accompanying Quercus and Ulmus. “Hi, welcome to Sturmhearst, folks! What brings you here?”
We all awkwardly try not to look at Vigdor’s leg bag.
“I’m, uh, here to visit Dr. Emily Thorpe?” he tries.
“Oh, visiting the university. Don’t need yer life story. Where you stayin’? I can recommend some inns. Oh, and check out the Scholar’s Temple while yer here!” He hands us a brochure from the Sturmhearst Tourism Board and steps back. “ALL RIGHT BIG GUYS, LET EM THROUGH!”
The owl guards don’t move.
“Oh, uh, I mean –“ He fishes in his pocket and pulls out a whistle. “Lemme see if I can remember how the doc told me to do this.” He blows a few sharp notes on the whistle, and the owl guards promptly step off the road to let us through.
Huh.
Vigdor makes an investigation check on those guards, who definitely weren’t around back when he was in school. They’re pretty bulky for humans – no, honestly, they’d be bulky even for goliaths. He’d heard a story from Professor Bjork that the school was hiring goliath mercs and dressing them in owl masks, but the professor had sounded like he hadn’t believed it much. Supposedly they’re silent because they don’t speak the language, but Vigdor’s pretty sure Bjork speaks Jotunn, so that excuse doesn’t quite hold up.
Once we’re out of the guards’ earshot, Gral pulls a huddle. “Vigdor, the Key’s a more recent influence, so let us know about anything new or significantly more abundant – that’s where we’ll need to search.”
Vigdor hmms. “The big brass towers weren’t here before. And the owl guys didn’t used to be a thing.”
Gral cuts another glance back to the owl guards, considering. “…How much of a faux pas is it to remove a Sturmhearst person’s mask?”
“I mean, if you’re dealing with the plague, it’s kind of a dick move? And dangerous? But most people – it’s like, the same rudeness of grabbing someone’s hat or jacket. For some people it’s badge of honor or superiority, y’know, how amazing they were to get through the gauntlet of Sturmhearst. But mostly it’s a practical tool of the job. We’re not, like, afraid to show our faces.”
Gral nods. “So you wouldn’t have to duel them, then.”
“W-what?”
“Oh, with bards it’s like ‘you are not deserving of your title’ and you have to duel about it. You know, like, how dare you slander my name, I’ll have to fight you for my honor?”
“Oh, uh, no, nothing like that. The mask is proof of office, that’s all.”
Before we get investigating, though, it’s late and we should rest. Vigdor wasn’t a palling-around-town type, but he rolls a nat 20 and knows the best inn in the city – not one of those touristy places on the square; the best-kept-secret on a side street that only the locals and regulars know about.
We have a lovely night around the docks of Sturmhearst. Shoshana spends like fifteen minutes just staring out to sea, because they MAKE boats that big???? This much water even EXISTS????? There’s a dragonborn ship from Aurentium, a goliath ship from Jotunhein, a couple of Galwan freighters, and even a ship crewed by colorful macaw aarakocra. (History check: while the Aquilians mostly died out, some of the ground-based aarakocra cultures survived. Valeria’s met macaw traders before in Aurentium; they tell lots of stories and do GREAT impressions.)
Valeria, meanwhile, holies some ocean water. They say Galwan clerics swear by holy seawater; salt repels demons, right? It’s gross harbor water but, whatever, it’s holy now. She also beats a sea captain at Man-go, presumably dock style. The inn’s equipped for foreign travelers, so it’s got a whole bar of draconic and goblin spices!
Gral, meanwhile, discovers the inn is near a bath house and enjoys finding out what a sauna is.
Morning comes, and Sturmhearst U awaits. Vigdor knows the main campus has the colleges of Engineering, Science, and Medicine, while the satellite campus across the bay houses the college of Ethics, which includes humanities like economics and history.
Valeria rolls for Order of the Rose knowledge. The Order actually has an arrangement with Sturmhearst when they’re working in Valdia – whenever the Order is sent on disaster relief, some Sturmhearst ethicists are sent to help coordinate. Valeria’s never worked with them personally, but the impression she’s gotten from her fellow knights is Not Great. From what she’s heard, they’re supposed to do triage and help direct the knights, but it seems like they spend the whole time sitting around debating absolutely horrible things. “Hey, if we brewed up some necromancy, could we use the skeletons of plague victims to transport supplies without spreading the infection?” Apparently they just sit around in corners debating whether that kind of shit is kosher or not, without ever actually DOING anything.
Also ethicists wear white instead of black like most Sturmhearst scholars, which is just pretentious. We then poke fun at an Order of the Rose knight calling anyone else pretentious.
Vigdor studied at the College of Medicine; he’s a doctor. But that’s not where he’s taking the leg.
“Why not Medicine? I mean, it’s a human body part, innit?” Shoshana asks.
“It’s…I have some concerns…regarding the, um. So, along with this leg, my arm was stolen, right? Not long after the arm was stolen, the sewn-together amalgams got a lot, uh, cleaner.”
We stare at him.
“…as if whatever stitched them together had my medical training.”
…oh.
“I’m a little hesitant taking that info to the College of Medicine,” he admits.
“Why?”
“There’s a lot of ‘for the greater good’ stuff with the College of Medicine sometimes. The College of Ethics keeps them in check. Anyway, there’s actually this thaumochemist I want to take a look at it.”
(We’d know the discipline as alchemy, but she hates that. She’ll go on a whole tirade about it. Somebody yells “Full Metal Thaumochemist” and we accidentally take a commercial break. We’ll never get tired of that joke.)
More of those owl guards are at the door, supervised by a businesslike white-coated member of the College of Ethics. His mask is a bit more abstract than the ones we’re used to; not modeled after a bird face like the regular scholars’. He lets Vigdor in with no problem, though he’s a bit suspicious of the rest of us. We’re with a doctor, though, so he’ll let it slide. “Welcome to Sturmhearst, may your visit be enlightening.” He does the same whistle we heard before and the guards step aside. Gral’s a string guy, he can figure out the notes easily enough but he doesn’t whistle.
“Nothing goes on here without Ethics knowing about it, huh,” Gral observes.
More owl guards are stomping around, some carrying heavy objects. Vigdor knows where he’s going, but asks an owl guard for directions, as an experiment. The owl guard doesn’t even notice him. He steps in front of the guard, who just steps around him very politely.
The castle is a nightmare to navigate, like Hoeska, but we have an expert tour guide. “The old keep, the part that used to be a castle – that’s where all the 101 classes are and the whole working hospital. All the additions are laid out super weird, and then there’s the tunnels underneath. The Chem students had WILD parties down there, they brewed up all SORTS of stuff. The lighthouse is a real lighthouse, but it’s also where admin is, and the dean’s and headmaster’s offices. Oh! DO NOT cross the librarians. Each college has its own library? Like, theoretically they share the whole collection, but which college keeps which books is kind of a blood sport…”
Shoshana and Gral hang back, feeling out of place. “Bards don’t really have a college, exactly?” Gral explains. “It’s more of a pilgrimage. I met the elders of each village and they imparted wisdom upon me?”
Shosh feels like an uneducated hick even by that standard.
We take a hairpin turn in one of the Science buildings and run into Professor Quercus! Or at least someone with a bird mask and a similar voice, chatting with some other masked scholar. “Ah! Yes! We made a lot of excellent discoveries before we started to run into problems – you see, there hadn’t been an event in some time, but if we could get in there to the source, we could really – well, my goodness! These are the people I was telling you about, who gave me such wonderful notes!” Quercus turns to us, sounding rather delighted. “I certainly didn’t expect to see you here. Welcome to the world of knowledge! What brings you here? I thought you were having adventures and derring-do!”
“Well, it turns out our adventures led here!” Gral tells him.
Quercus nods enthusiastically. “I’d show you around, but I rather need to speak to the bursar! If you need anything, I’m sure you can find my offices without too much problem. And please, if you’ve encountered any interesting monsters, I’d love to hear details! Especially if you have samples!” Despite his keen excitement, Professor Quercus rolls a four and fails to notice our Shusva accessories.
“If you ever need a cup of tea and a biscuit, you’re welcome to stop by my office! I’d be more than happy to speak with you! And if you could do me a favor – well, I wouldn’t mind having you with me when I speak to the bursar! See, our expedition to Holzog has hit a bit of a snag. The events with that mist stopped happening, you see. Luckily, we managed to identify which house you were going to, and we were all set to investigate, but then the Baroness put a squadron of those damnable Condotierri to prevent us getting in – “
Gral shrugs, deliberately casual. “I don’t know why you’d go back; there’s not much to see besides what’s already in the notes.”
(Vigdor immediately rolls insight to see if Gral is lying. Unfortunately for him, bards are excellent liars.)
“Anyway. The bursar’s giving me an earful about continuing to fund the expedition. I’m considering withdrawing from Holzog and asking him to redirect the funds into a different project! For example, lots of interesting monsters have been seen around Barroch lately!”
Yes, definitely, we want him to go somewhere that’s not a Tempting Key Portal. Valeria and Gral tag-team Persuasion checks to sell him on interesting cases of monsters we’ve heard of around Barroch. If we’re fuzzy on the details – well, all the more reason to have someone get out there and take a closer look!
Quercus is rather taken by the idea. “If you would, Mr. Duu –“
“Um, actually, Duu is the tribe, my family’s name is-“
“-yes, if you could write me some letters, I might find it useful making the acquaintance of the locals while setting up camp. Sturmhearst hasn’t established an official relationship to your people yet’”
Gral agrees to write up a formal letter explaining the mission of Sturmhearst and the expedition to make introductions a bit smoother; the word of a bard will go a long way in gaining the cooperation of the orcs of Barroch. He’ll do a personal letter of introduction for Quercus, and a general letter to Shieldeater’s administration to explain who the heck these weird bird people are.
“Wonderful! Bring it by my office!” He gives us directions that make NO sense to anyone but Vigdor. We’re pretty sure several of those compass directions aren’t real words?
“Oh, and if you see an angry tall woman stomping around, tell her I’m not here! She’s mad at me for some reason I can’t discern. Good day!”
He scuttles off, presumably to hide.
We definitely want the gossip on that – Ulmus was mad at him about funding, and she definitely dissed his field of study. Is this what academia is like?
Vigdor confirms that the professors have all kind of weird beefs, interdepartmental politics, and personal feuds. “One of my professors gave me a B- in amputation – shows what he knows – purely because I was taking some classes outside the College of Medicine and he got all offended. It’s a lot of politics and bullshit, they’re all more concerned about their careers and publishing than actually important stuff.”
We find a door with a brass plaque: Dr Emily Thorpe, Thaumochemist. There’s a paper list tacked to her door with a list of courses: “Intro to Potion Brewing,” “Principles of Alchemy Thaumochemistry”
Vigdor knocks. “Yes, who’s there? Come in!” a voice calls.
“It’s Vigdor! Vigdor Gavril!”
“Ah, Vigdor!” A halfling woman in the requisite bird mask waves from behind a counter where she’s handling a set of proper Movie Science bubbling beakers and flasks. “Yes, you sent me that letter! You had something ‘interesting’ for me!”
“Yes, and you will see why I couldn’t be more detailed!”
She notices his metal arm as he starts pulling open his heavy waterproofed case. “Oh! I heard that Professor Bjork was giving you his prototype! How’s it working?”
“They’re loud and heavy and uncomfortable sometimes, but I have limbs! Can’t complain! But then I, uh, found one of my limbs again.”
He goes over to an open table and pulls out his entire-ass leg with a flourish, plus vials of hair and blood and strange unidentified liquids. Her eyes widen.
“Ah, this is yours!” She watches his toes wiggle. “Well, you don’t see that every day.”
“Yeah, I found it stitched to some kind of unholy undead abomination.”
“And that explains the Knight of the Rose. Hello, Kyr.”
“Kyr Valeria Argent, at your service!”
“Dr. Emily Thorpe, at your service as well, I guess? Pardon the mess in my lab, it’s not much but it’s home. Hand me that vial?” She pulls out a syringe and takes a sample of not blood, but oily black liquid, from the leg. “It will take some time, but I can write up a thaumaturgical profile without much difficulty. Do you mind if I keep it?”
“You can hang on to it. But I would appreciate discretion.”
“Yes, this will stay between me, your friends, and – oh, this is Hugo, he’s my teaching assistant. He’s been helping since the school was mobilized.” She turns to Vigdor’s clearly uneducated hick friends (not you, Valeria, you’re very fancy) and explains:
“In times of crisis, the University turns from education to innovation. Were this a disease, we’d be researching cures! If demonic, we’d be researching weapons or dimensional banishment. We haven’t really received direct orders this time, so everybody is doing their own thing, which I can’t say I mind. Mostly I’ve been helping other researchers with the practical application of their theorems.”
She scribbles out a hasty list. “Hugo, if you can go to the library and put these books on order? The Vigmar and the Auspelius especially would be useful, but don’t let the librarians kill anyone over them. And the Principles of Advanced Anatomy – tell them I won’t ask. But I do need it.” The grad student nods and hustles out of the room.
(Shoshana insights, out of paranoia. Hugo’s a good egg, though he might refer to thaumochemistry as alchemy.)
“Now, Dr. Gavril, do you want this leg back? How intact-“
“Want it back? Like, in the abstract, or on my body?”
She pulls out a vial of bubbling acid. “I’d like to put some of this on it and I’d like to see what happens.”
He blanches slightly. “Uh. Um. I have some proprietary-“
“Aw, no acid then,” she grumbles, stowing the acid with an audible sigh.
“Only do something you would do to living person’s leg. That they would survive!”
“How would I know? I’m a chemist, this is only, like, my second dead person!” She pauses. “…well, fifth.”
Shoshana starts looking around at all the alchemy equipment curiously. Everything here is clearly labeled with numbers, and letters that feel like numbers, and complex formulae, which hedgewitch potionery doesn’t really account for.
There’s a knock at the door. “Ah, that must be Hugo. Come in!”
Valeria instinctively body-blocks the leg from view.
It is not Hugo. In walk 3 white-clad ethicists. The gentleman at the front is in fancier robes – we suspect he’s the kind of fellow who has tenure – and he wears a powdered judge’s wig atop his mask. We immediately don’t like it. His two companions peer around the lab – one has a jeweler’s loupe built into the lens of his mask, and the other is carrying a big chime with runes carved into it, clearly a magic item of some sort.
“Dr Thorpe,” the leader intones.
“Sorbus,” she replies disdainfully.
“I see you have guests, is now a bad time?”
“Is it ever a good time?” Emily makes a point of tending to her samples and beakers busily.
“I suppose not. We have come to ask a few follow-up questions. Have you been visited at all by Professor Matthias Macker? Has he followed up on the project you were working on together?”
“I told you, no! I had no potions strong or precise enough for what he needed, and he’s never spoken to me since. That was months ago!”
“And no one has seen him since then. You understand why we need to know what you discussed.”
“Yeah, not since you quarantined the whole surgical wing!”
“That is not what I’m asking about. Has Macker’s assistant Greta Ruble visited you?”
“No. She’s a good kid, though, don’t hassle her.”
“We are simply making sure she is not a danger.”
Emily sputters angrily. “A danger to who?!”
“I cannot tell you that.” He turns to Valeria. “Kyr, it is always a pleasure to see a member of the Order here. I suppose if you’re here we can be assured nothing… unethical is happening,” he says, unpleasantly oily. “I am Professor Rigmor Sorbus of the College of Ethics; I lecture on legal and judicial ethics. These are my assistants, Charles and Pippin.”
Valeria bows with the precise degree of politeness required. “Kyr Valeria Argent, at your service.”
“A pleasure to make your acquaintance. In these times of mobilization, it falls to us as ethicists to supervise our colleagues’ noble efforts. Please, I implore you: if you see anything untoward or suspiciously unusual, I request you report it to the nearest representative of the College of Ethics.”
Emily butts in. “What happened to Eric Pelbort, his other assistant?”
“Mr. Pelbort has transferred to the College of Ethics and is assisting us with some research. We will let you know if that changes.” He tells her dismissively. “Kyr Argent, the College of Ethics has always been proud of our long association with the Order, and I would like to extend our deepest condolences for the tragedy of the Crusade. Should you have need of any assistance whatsoever, do not hesitate to ask. Our offices are on the satellite campus across the bay. If you were to visit, I’m sure many would love to speak to a paladin of the Order of the Rose.”
“We have business here, but I might be able to make time to stop by,” she equivocates.
“Very well. I will let you all get back to whatever it is you’re doing with that leg,” Sorbus says, turning neatly on his heel and taking his leave, his toadies hurrying in his wake.
(Yes, you guessed it: That was Professor Rowan, with his Tort Wig and his assistants Pip Loupe and Chime Charles.)
“Those guys give me the creeps,” Emily grumbles. “They used to be fine, but lately they’ve been doing this whole inquisitor act.”
Vigdor’s always known these guys as douchey blowhards. But now they’re douchey blowhards with AUTHORITY.
There’s always been a divide between Ethics and the other three colleges roughly the size of the harbor! The sciences don’t believe in debate, they believe in experimentation! Anyone who can spend an entire week talking without action is wasting time and breath. The College of Medicine thinks even less of them – they just get in the way of progress!
(IRL we all respect medical ethics, but Sturmhearst WAS founded on a fine tradition of graverobbing and leeches.)
Vigdor is primarily a surgeon, or he was, when he had two fully functional hands. (Two players at once: “HE GOT DR STRANGED!”) He had quite a few classes with Macker, the chair of the surgery department. Most people didn’t like the guy, except his surgical grad students who would defend him to the death. A bit of a hardass about proper procedure, but that’s probably not a bad quality for a surgeon. He was a local institution, so it’s pretty alarming he’s somehow gone rogue.
“His whole lab was quarantined?”
“The whole teaching wing, actually,” Emily tells us.
“Are there people in there? Some kind of sickness?”
“Not that I’ve heard. Ethics just put guards outside the labs and blocked everyone from going in. They’ve done it to a couple places around the school recently. The excuse is that someone was doing ‘unsafe experimentation’ that’s ‘poisoned the area’ or something?”
Wack. “How long have these quarantines lasted?”
“They don’t really end? A couple stopped after a few months, but some have been there for a year! Nobody goes in or out. Sometimes the white coats go in, but it’s pretty rare and they don’t stay long.”
“Is that what all the guards are for? Where’d they all come from?” Vigdor asks.
“Medicine used to be the ones, uh, hiring them.” (A quick insight roll notes that she hesitates on the phrase “hiring.”) “Lots of them still answer to whoever they were originally assigned to. But recently Dean Chidor from the College of Ethics took over that whole program, so a lot of the newer ones answer primarily to the ethicists. I mean, they all dress the same, so it’s kinda hard to tell? I haven’t asked a lot of questions, I’ve been trying to keep my head down since the whole thing with Macker.”
“What actually happened with him?”
“He’d been acting weird for a while,” she confides as she starts sticking pins in the leg and wiring them to a voltage generator. “He’d been working on something, some kind of extreme surgery – I think he was looking into a method of surgically removing Curse corruption. He was hitting roadblocks, though; he called in me and Alma Ulmus, who’s a College of Medicine bigwig.”
“Yeah, we met her in Bad Herzfeld!”
“I heard she’s here again, stalking around the halls complaining about funding. She knows more about his project than I do. Anyway, Macker sent me requirements for a healing potion he was gonna administer as part of some surgical procedure. I couldn’t get anything as powerful or precise as he needed. I’m a thaumochemist; I don’t know medicine that well. So it was beyond me to do that amount of gross tissue damage repair as controllably as they wanted it. I mean, I made some pretty nice innovations as far as the theory of potioncrafting, I’m hoping to get published as soon as it goes to peer review.
“But I couldn’t do what he needed, and eventually I got shut out of the project. Then one day he vanished. Alma set off for Bad Herzfeld and Macker stopped coming out of his lab. His assistants were still going in and out, but not long after that, the ethicists quarantined the place.”
“Has anyone else been quarantined?” Valeria asks.
“People from all three colleges got hit. I dunno about other ethicists, I haven’t heard about them quarantining anything of their own. But everyone else has. A group of engineering students were building a defense system to be deployed out to the Scar, and all of them got quarantined. Here in my department, Dr. Vilman – remember him? Stupid goatee, did a lot of stuff with crystals? – got shut down. Sometimes they quarantine the whole lab; sometimes they just shut down a project and everyone working on it gets a ‘guest lecture position’ over in Ethics. Sorbus said they got one of Macker’s assistants, Eric Pelbort. He had another one, Greta Ruble, but I guess she’s given them the slip.”
Emily’s got experiments to do on that leg, so we’ll let her get to it. As we head out, Gral asks one last question. “What’s up with those guards, by the way? Why do they only respond to those whistles?
“Uhhhh,” she says, as we fail our persuasion check. “They, er, don’t speak very good Valdian. Mostly foreigners, goliaths, the like. The whistles get their attention.”
Gral sighs and doesn’t push it. Vigdor’s already making plans to pickpocket a whistle. Valeria, since she has a direct invite to talk to the ethicists, considers the unheard-of paladin approach of Just Asking Them Directly.
First, though, Vigdor wants to check out the quarantine of Macker’s lab; he knew that professor well, and we’re all curious what’s been going down.
We walk on over to the surgical wing to case the joint. There’s a single owl guard blocking the hallway, presiding over a small barricade. A pleasant sandwich board sign states “Area quarantined by College of Ethics, apologies for the inconvenience.”
We try to walk in and the enormous guard holds out a hand to stop us. Shoshana tries to wiggle around him, like a cat trying to get at your dinner, but he impassively blocks her every move.
Gral tries a smoother approach. He begins with small talk; the guard doesn’t even twitch. He starts asking prying questions about the surgical ward. No response. Fine, then: he switches to Orcish, a sinister undertone weaving through his voice as he uses Words of Terror.
An insight roll reveals completely unchanged body language.
“Either they’re immune to fear or not a humanoid,” Gral reports back. “Not a single emotion. Definitely not goliath mercenaries.”
“Tryin’ to talk your way into the surgical wing?” says another chatty passerby. “Good luck. They got all the medical cadavers locked up in there and they won’t let us in.”
(Cadavers? Oh shit, we bet that’s the guard factory, theorize the players.)
“Oh, are you a med student?”
“Yeah. I work with Professor Herberts, or I used to, anyway. We needed a couple cadavers to do this comparison study about spleens; we got some weird ones from out in the wood, we compare spleens to see if place with thing don’t worry about it; need control spleen. And then these BIG DUMB IDIOTS wouldn’t let us in, and Herbert got transferred to the College of Ethics all of a sudden. He’s been gone a couple months.”
“How long do professors usually transfer for?” asks Gral.
“I mean, they usually pop over to give a lecture or two and come back by the end of the day.”
(Vigdor happens to remember that the College of Ethics also runs an asylum. They live in a big spooky castle and do dissections with guts and stuff, it can do a number on your head! Some of the ethicists have branched into the field of psychology. No reason to mention this when people are having extended stays on the ethics campus, of course…)
The student shrugs. “I gotta get to lecture. If you manage to get in there, any chance you can bring me back a couple spleens?”
We wave goodbye noncommittally, though Vigdor insists he can pop a spleen out of a corpse like a yolk from an egg. He’s a good surgeon!
Anyway, Vigdor went to school here, and the dice are on his side; he knows a side path through an old abandoned classroom into the surgical suite. He pops the lock on the door easily; all the undergrads used to go this way when slipping into lecture late, to get past the TA keeping track of tardies.
The guard is in earshot but facing the other direction, and he’s not even blinking, much less scanning around. Gral casts Silence on us and our very clanky party slips by easily.
Shosh sticks her head into the TA’s office. Nothing really stands out, but she swipes some interesting-looking notes from the desk drawers to look at later.
Meanwhile, Gral and Vigdor go into Macker’s office. The desk is an absolute mess, which is very unlike the guy Vigdor used to know. There are wheeled chalkboards crammed into the office, covered in scribbles and anatomical diagrams. Paging through the notes and glancing over the chalkboard, Vigdor makes a decent medicine check and can at least figure out what problem Macker was working on.
Based on what Dr. Emily told us, Macker’s trying to develop a surgical procedure. The issue is that whatever he’s doing would cause so much physical trauma that it’d kill the patient, and he’s looking for some way to prevent that. There are lists of healing options: formulas, spells, potions, nonmagical stabilization methods to keep the patient alive while various tissues are extracted from the body.
Gral’s unimpressed. Healing methods? That’s pretty tame for forbidden knowledge.
To Vigdor’s experienced eyes, this stuff looks mega-advanced and highly experimental, but Gral’s right – it’s not anything you’d scramble to censor.
Weirdly enough, the place doesn’t look ransacked, only disheveled and a little dusty. Macker’s notes haven’t been moved since he was here. Maybe this isn’t what the ethicists were after?
We head to cadaver storage while Valeria keeps watch. Cadaver storage is creepy as hell, but only because it’s, y’know, a room full of cadavers. A lot of the bodies, kept stable with Gentle Repose, appear to be Cursed, but that’s hardly weird. What’s so crazy they’d keep it hidden from everyone?
Vigdor opens the door to the dissection labs, Gral’s Silence deadening any ominous warning he might have had from the room beyond. Yes, the table here’s been recently used, and the bizarre symbols scrawled on the chalkboards have spilled onto the surrounding floor and walls, but Vigdor’s eyes are drawn to where the chalkboard peels away like skin to reveal a strange, multicolored, impossible space. The floor begins to take the shape of a stone hand that projects out into the shimmering void, joining a daisy-chain of enormous hands that form a walkway out to a marble platform floating in space.
Gral takes his Silence spell with him and runs to get Valeria.
Eyes starry, watching entire worlds and impossible shapes spinning through iridescent mists, Vigdor takes his first heady hit of Key taint.
As we cut session, Valeria considers that the ethicists may actually have a point.
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mxrcayong · 4 years ago
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about me tag !
tagged by: @kopikokun (bruh i love you)
tagging:  @pastelsicheng @lucas-wongs 
name: gracie!
gender: female (she/her)
star sign: cancer sun, gemini moon, capricorn rising 
height: okay so im SO bad at remembering numbers and the units or the numbers always get mixed up. i’m either almost 5′3 ft or 153 cm. 
time: 2:03 am
birthday: 18 july (lets go taemin)
favorite bands: oof okay so i have about 8000+ songs on my itunes so this is a v difficult question for me. off the top of my head, it’d be nct (and all subunits), exo, the maine, push baby, catfish and bottlemen, oh wonder, 1975, ajr, and half alive (the lack of girl groups are so disappointing i’m so sorry)
(lol fun fact i hate using spotify for myself i get stressed lol)
favorite soloists: oof okay i repeat, i have a ton of soloists i love and also i have a lot of songs that i LOVE but dislike the rest of the songs. i’d say my favorite soloists are Joji, NIKI, KATIE, harry styles, halsey, olivia rodrigo (yo her unreleased song “21st century girls” is obsessive), and leila alcasid! i think those are my main ones rn? 
last movie: i watch more tv shows recently! but the last movie i watched was knives out and anastasia
last show: okay ngl ive been binging winx club just for some good nostalgia and background noise while i work but the last show i seriously watched was extraordinary you. a lot of tv shows i want to watch right now are korean but i can’t understand korean so i have to read the subtitles, and i can’t do that while working on something at the same time because it often means i have to rewind a million times
song stuck in my head: okay so ive been cleaning out my music to cut down bc it’s taking up too much space. as a result, no song has really been stuck in my head as ive been going through my music library? 
a song that got stuck in my head recently tho is “now” by olivia o’brien or “puzzle piece” by nct dream
when i created this blog: i created mxrcayong in april/may 2020? 
last thing i googled: 153cm to feet for this tag lol 
other blogs: it’s a really private, personal one sorry!! i’d share it once i get more comfy w sharing it with people. not even my irl friends know about it haha 
do i get asks: not many! i’m always open for chats or questions or requests so send in asks whenever x 
why i chose my url: so mxrcayong is a combination of mark, lucas, and taeyong who were the three people who got me into nct? my friend introduced me to taeyong first, and then lucas (her bias in nct), and then i really started liking mark and he became my ult haha 
average hours of sleep: 4-6 hours on weekdays, around 8 on weekends lol
instruments: i had a stereotypical asian parent growing up so i had to learn piano and violin for three years but i sucked sO BAD. i stopped now haha but i wish i could pick up guitar or piano again. 
what i’m wearing right now: pajamas bc i should be asleep soon lol
dream trip: honestly, a road trip around the world. i’m super into learning about different cultures. my top destinations next have to be japan or venice, 
favorite food: oOF a hard triple tie between this dish i learnt to cook of terriyaki/soya chicken with cheese, macaroni and cheese, or this soy/honey chicken my tita makes which literally is so good
(i’m also a sucker for chicken nuggets and a good burger or ramen) 
nationality: i’m australian, filipino, finnish but i was born in singapore! 
favorite song: recently it has to be “helium” by glass animals, “modus” by joji, or “thinking of you” by KATIE, or “what do i call you” by taeyeon 
top three fictional universes: i’d say avatar because i grew up with that, winx purely bc i’m watching it again now, and 
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i am out there!! i'm glad you liked it! i'm definitely trying out the recipe you left in the tags. it sounds way better than just banana and peanut butter. i always have to pay a lot of attention when i type banana because i've ended up with "bananana" way too many times
i was planning to run straight to your askbox the second i saw you replied but then the end of the semester happened and it killed me. hopefully i'm done with it now
i do exactly the same thing with height! if you tell me your height in feet i have absolutely no idea how tall that is. if you say that in centimetres that's easy. i mean you're 155cm so that's 12cm shorter than me. when you told me that in feet i was like okay cool i have no idea how much shorter than actually is
i love birds!!! so that seems awesome! i am now titling you the queen of birds. and i'm glad your vacation was good! i think i saw a couple of posts you made about it so it definitely does seem like a lot of fun! and did you ever figure out completely what that see through animal (?) in the sand was? i had no idea stuff like that even existed so now i'm invested in knowing what it is
i am 100% hiring you for my coming out party i'm throwing in a couple of years. it's gonna be fun. if we don't get immediately kicked out i promise good food and some spicy drama between my homophobic relatives and my accepting relatives! and my brother's, who i already came out to, dry commentary
i was definitely not the one you told about burma trails! but from the tags i'm just gonna say how is that allowed and why does it seem like a weird type of torture? i hate it, i probably would've had a heart attack 3 seconds in
oh yeah i actually can't tell most of the time if the memories from my childhood are actual memories or if it's just a combination of having seen photos and heard stories about it
my glasses prescription is fine i think. my eye doctor said that i get headaches from glasses because... well i tried to explain this and then deleted it all because it was a very scientific explanation when she said it and i zoned out pretty much halfway through and even the part that i did understand i can't translate to english! but it has something to do with the fact that with contacts it's enough to move my eyes in the direction i want to look at and with glasses i have to move my whole head and my brain got so used to contacts that it overdoes it with the eye movements when wearing glasses? i dunno. this is the best i can do in explaining it
i must admit i'm very jealous of the never snows part because while snow is pretty to look at it's absolutely freezing! for the past week i slept under a duvet, three blankets while wearing pants and a long sleeve shirt and i still woke up cold. because for a couple of nights it was around -22°C. it's great
ohhh you got pretty lucky as a kid then! my kid self would have absolutely lost it at getting the equivalent of 5/10 bucks. i probably would have bought so much candy
excellent!!! hope you’re enjoying the vague void from whence you came! i’ve never said whence before in my LIFE i wonder if i used it correctly. anyway. the actual recipe was way more specific but once i saw ‘2 frozen bananas’ and looked at all the sliced bananas in my fridge, having no idea how many there were, i just started improvising sdfkhsdfs. I’d be interested to try it with yoghurt though if I can get some dairy free plain stuff, I’m sure I can somewhere. Banana used to be my biggest problem when I was younger. Then I learnt words like occasion and necessary and embarrassed and I realised the more english I tried to learn, the worse my life was gonna get. And I was right. On the bright side, developing an inability to ever spell occasion correctly made banana seem a lot easier to handle.
that is fair. end of semesters are rough. i cannot function during them at all. i hope everything chills out for you!! i’m not sure how the school year is over there but maybe it’s break time? that’d be nice. but rest in peace anyway, enjoy being dead! they say necromancy is frowned upon in all societies but I reckon it’s just called making a friend when you’re dead so maybe you wanna take that up as a hobby! I’ve heard it’s nice this time of year!
yup! sometimes I’m like oh you’re 5 foot 4? that sounds way taller than me. but it...it really isn’t...it’s like an extra 8cm or something. which adds up! but in my head I was picturing a MUCH taller height. In my head I think I picture 6 foot and 5 foot 4 as the same height, now that I think about it.
!!!!! my first order as queen of birds is to meet a morepork face to face so we can chat about the price of pork these days. yes!! the first half was nice but the second half was really fun. my best guess is still that it’s a salp? Maybe? So many salp pictures are massive groups of them but like,, from what i can tell of singular photos,,, it was maybe that? I guess the only other possibility is it’s just some clear jellyfish but salp does seem more likely. At first I was like oh duuude boob implant for the ocean!! but then I realised it actually seemed kinda alive and was probably an actual creature. my bad.
excellent. i’ll break any tension by dropping the vampire act for the mouse act. will do backflips for cheese. will bite ankles for homophobic comments. Will pull a knife out of god knows where, not to threaten anyone, just to clean my nails with to make everyone nervous. I offer many services. I’m flexible. And I love me some good food.
I actually DON’T know the reason behind burma trails. I really don’t. The reason ‘it’s a fun activity!’ seems a little fake. if it’s a fun activity then why did Mrs. G. tell us a horror story about the forest before we went out to navigate said forest at night, blindfolded, surrounded by wildlife and parents supervising (*cough* waiting for the opportunity to jump out at you *cough*) with a teacher at the end waiting to scare us. So we can learn how to navigate the forest in the dark? So we learn how to follow a mysterious rope INTO the forest at night? seems dodgy to me. school camps be like [drives you out to forest] follow this rope and don’t take your blindfold off. like. bruh. i almost DID have a heart attack one time, I got stuck like something was holding my leg. First thought-ah, must’ve got my leg stuck in a big stick. Second thought-maybe this is one of the parents fucking around, it feels more like a grip than a twig. Third thought-I cannot get my leg free no matter what I do what the fuck is HAPPENING so I started crying out for help. When they FINALLY came they found nothing my leg was caught on so that was fun. love that for me. I was able to move as soon as they arrived. That’s not weird at all. anyway.
I think most of my early memories are just from stories I’ve been told and photos I’ve seen. My memory tends to be horrible I highly doubt I remember that one time I was eating dirt from the garden out in the yard gleefully. I just saw the photo evidence. mm spaghetti. bone apple teeth. my character hasn’t changed at all since I was a wee babe.
ohhhh okay. I think I get what you mean by that. Thank you for trying to explain! That’s really interesting. I guess I do move my head a lot with glasses. Although I have massive glasses so it’s probably easier for me to just move my eyes where I want. I reckon with smaller glasses I’d have to move my head way more.
the temperature comment is so funny because during the heart of winter i tend to sleep with a sheet, a blanket, a duvet, then 2-4 blankets on top while in a long sleeve shirt and long pants and sometimes bed socks and often a hottie (i’ve never realised how that sounds out of context...a hot water bottle...is calling it a hottie normal or is a my family thing? is this a nz thing? now i’m questioning myself). in my uni accommodation last year we didn’t have proper heating during most of winter and well. there was a quilt added to everything else. every blanket i could find. how cold does it get here in winter? rarely ever past 0 degrees celsius. I would literally die in your position, clearly. I could not survive that. Props to you for making it through aha.
yesss. Before when I found five dollar notes it’d be on the street and I’d be like oh no! Mum we have to hand this into the police station! It’s a lot of money, someone will be looking for it! Understandably she was like,, lindsey they might miss it but there’s not really any way you can find them,,, I still refused to spend it. That was like my first time really getting that much money for myself. The dairy on main street sold lollies for 10 cents each and they had like, 30 different lil glass boxes so you’d go I want 3 of 26, 5 of 7, ohhh and 5 of 13 please! I dunno if they’re still 10 cents each but I thought it was the best thing ever as a kid. I think I wanted to save the money though sfdjsdkfhs put it in my piggy bank to save up for something ‘super cool’. Aka probably like a neat soft toy to sleep with sdfsdkfs.
#Anonymous#i wrote the majority of this reason like a couple hours after you sent it#then i went to bed because it was late. thinking to myself. oh i'll finish the last bit in the morning!#but of course in the morning the lil 1 didn't show up above mail and it was located in my drafts now so my dumb ass was like ah yes#absolutely nothing to respond to here!#i should know by now i never remember if i save things to drafts sfjshkdfhsdf#anyway#i REMEMBERED. a few days late. BUT i didn't just forget entirely so! there's that!#now i'll finish the last bit of the response and edit the incomprehensible tired mumbling parts#although i'm currently overheating so now it'll be incomprehensible overheated brain parts! fun!#no i cannot handle cold temperatures no i cannot handle 'hot' temperatures i can handle like a one to two degree range#and nothing else. life is. a trip.#I still don't know what to call dairy's when talking to people outside nz#corner store? they're not always on corners. convenience store? maybe. small shop? idk dude#i don't quite know the correct thing to equate them to.#but they sell lollies sometimes. that's the main point here sdkjhskdf#now to decide what I'm doing tonight#play stardew valley. watch someone else play stardew valley on youtube. stare at my ceiling thinking about stardew valley. do the dishes#earlier today i was like maybe...maybe i'll watch a movie...add some variety to my life...#i wanted to rewatch whatever movie has that song that is like agggooonnnyyyyyy#that's the only word i remember from the song. so it's that. or...well...back to my obsession
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uniformbravo · 3 years ago
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having a full on existential crisis over an episode of anime i watched tonight
it all started with big time rush
in 2009 a sitcom called big time rush aired for the first time on nickelodeon; it was about a group of four teenaged boys from minnesota who move to hollywood under a famous producer to become his next big boy band sensation. a simple premise, launched into unprecedented success, resulting in four seasons of musical shenanigans, three full music albums, and three big concert tours, including international shows. the band, both fictional and real life, featured four attractive young men by the names of kendall, james, carlos, and logan. they quickly gained a fan base of mostly teenage girls, which resulted in online spaces created for the purpose of sharing their passion, and as is common in such online communities, this certainly involved fanfiction- lots of it.
enter me, a teen in high school who loved to write fanfiction. my big time journey began the day my younger sister decided to put on the show big time rush in the living room, where i sat at the family computer typing away. the noise caught my attention, and i got sucked into the episode. there was a boy wearing a dress on the screen. i became interested.
i watched more of the show. i typed its name into the search bar on the website fanfiction dot net. i had a friend at school who shared my interest in fanfiction, particularly of the slash variety. i introduced her to this new show i had been watching. she shared a fanfic she had enjoyed immensely with me. we dragged each other into the world of big time rush fanfiction reading and writing.
it took over my life; i lived and breathed big time rush. i began posting my own stories to fanfiction dot net. i received positive feedback; i met people. i made friends- two people in particular who became very close friends. we communicated through ffn’s private messaging system, then through email. we talked every day, we wrote stories for and with each other, we exchanged phone numbers. it was one of these friends who introduced me to the website called tumblr, where fellow fans of our beloved big time rush gathered and talked about it- a community.
it was a slow start- this website was new and unfamiliar to me- but eventually i got the hang of things and settled into my niche. i had fun, gained followers, met even more people. tumblr was a place not only for sharing one singular interest, but for accumulating all of your various interests and celebrating them in one place. it was through this aspect that i first learned of the up and coming band known as one direction.
they had released their first smash hit single and everyone was talking about it. i was wary, far too loyal to my beloved big time rush- but eventually i started to feel left out and in an effort to feel included, i decided to take the plunge and see what this “1d” was all about. it was intimidating, though- there was so much information, and no apparent beginner’s guide to tell me where to start. this drove me to making a post calling for a “one direction buddy” to take this role, to introduce me to all the most important aspects of this band. and my call was answered.
enter my wonderful friend cam, a follower of mine at the time. they were into both big time rush and one direction and were eager to provide me with all the information needed to get into 1d. while ultimately this venture didn’t amount to anything, as i lost interest in becoming a fan, my friendship with cam persisted and we grew very close. even as time went on and big time rush faded into the background to be replaced with newer, fresher interests, and our paths as fellow fandom members split, we kept in contact and remained friends. years and years of fandoms, years and years of friendship.
in the midst of the tenth year, cam developed a new interest, in a sport called ice hockey. as is tradition, they shared their passion with me, showing me their favorite team, highlighting their favorite members. we watched a game together. personally, i’ve never been one for sports, but i am quite into anime, which consists of many genres, including the “sports” genre. one in particular that i’ve enjoyed immensely in the past is the volleyball anime, haikyuu!!. this anime devotes a lot of time to explaining and depicting the sport in a way that makes it easy for any viewer to understand the rules and inner workings of volleyball. it’s exciting. it’s the first time i’ve ever even adjacently been invested in a sport. one could even call it a gateway into the world of sports.
all this to say, when i watched that game of ice hockey with cam, the same parts of my brain that loved haikyuu!! lit up and in a classic display of my specific brand of interest, i found myself yearning for the epic highs and lows of ice hockey, but in an animated format. an animated format originating in japan. a japanese animation. an anime. my curiosity burned a hole in my brain that resulted in a combination of the google search bar and the words, “hockey anime”.
to my disappointment, i found nothing- at least, not to the degree i was hoping. there is an upcoming anime, slated to air in the fall 2021 anime season, about a group of girls who form an ice hockey team together- as it is an original project rather than an adaptation, it remains to be seen whether the anime will fall into the category of “sports anime,” or if indeed it will lean much more closely to the “moe” genre. the latter is not what i had in mind during that particular search.
adding the anime called “pride of orange” to my “plan to watch” list on myanimelist dot com, i moved onto the next result: an article about an early 2010’s anime i had never heard of before. while not about the sport i was looking for, it featured a character whose signature weapon was a field hockey stick. it wasn’t even the right sport. it was a weak, insignificant link, but all was not lost.
i happen to have an affinity for watching anime i happen upon completely by random and know little to nothing about; i found the movie “anthem of the heart” purely coincidentally, when i searched the name “jun” as part of some research for one of my original characters and discovered that it was the main character of said movie, which i then watched and ended up enjoying quite a lot. another time, when i was at best buy one day i happened upon a dvd on their dedicated anime shelf for a movie called “hana and alice”, which i had never heard of before. i liked the box art, so i took a picture of it to remember the title and watched it on my own later that week; it became one of my favorite movies.
with these and other similar experiences in mind, i saved the anime in my “plan to watch” list, and, later that same week, began my watch of “sket dance.”
it’s a school comedy anime, one of my favorite genres, so it’s no surprise that after overcoming the initial skepticism i carry into every new show i watch it quickly became my new fixation. not an obsession, but something i was pleasantly surprised to find consistently enjoyable. the characters are fun, the humor is tight and fresh, and the stories are unexpectedly touching at the right moments. everything i like to see.
which brings us to tonight. the culmination of this ten plus year string of events and occurrences. getting into big time rush. joining tumblr. meeting cam. watching anime. searching for hockey anime.
i put down my apple(TM) pencil. i set my ipad aside. i downsized the ebook window i’d been referencing. i stretched; i was hungry and tired. i’d been rereading passages of various animorphs books all day. i needed a break. i needed to sit back with some food and an episode of my latest comfort watch, sket dance. it’d be nice to set the dramatic, tragic world of animorphs aside for something lighthearted and fun in its place.
well.
i sat down with my bowl of strawberries and played the episode. it finished. i watched another. this one broke the formula a bit, played with the art style. i was into it. the preview for the next episode was mysteriously blank, and short, stating only the title. it was intriguing. i’m down for the show to get a bit more serious for an episode, i thought. i’m down for some potential backstory for one of the main three. i’m ready.
i was not ready.
bruh.
b r u h .
next two episodes proceeded to take me out back and beat me to within an inch of my life, slowly at first and then all at once. barely made it out alive. questioning everything. how can a show, so silly and goofy, do that, to me. how could i let my guard down like that. how could i be so tricked, and deceived, and blindsided like this. i don’t know who to trust. i don’t know if i can trust again. whiplash so damaging, permanent. i thought i wanted answers. i thought i wanted to know backstory. i didn’t want this. i never wanted this. emptiness
how did it come to this, these twelve years of my life. had i known back then, would i have posted that fanfiction? would i have joined tumblr? would i have sook out a “one direction buddy”? a hollow husk of a person, i am left with only my thoughts to ponder this small history of mine. the things i could have done differently. the things others could have done differently. all these butterfly effect moments, adding up to what? culminating in what? it’s 2:26 am and i’m writing an essay on how shook i am over that episode instead of going to sleep. but i can’t just say nothing, you know? i need to put something out there, reach deep enough within myself to find the thing that’s still there, broken and huddled and tiny as it is. i need to feel some semblance of the self again. the me from before i watched this episode. the innocent version of myself, blissful in ignorance. it’s too late now.
that episode…………..was fucked up. that was seriously fucked up. im not okay bro they really just came in left field and slapped that in my face expecting me to get up and walk away just fine afterwards like No that isn’t how this Works y’all need to bundle some therapy sessions with ur episodes pullin that shit come ON
exhaustion is taking over the shock, i am simply tired now. i will fall asleep and when i wake up sket dance will be a happy fun show again with NO fucked up backstories ever Or Else. i’m fucking serious right now i’m gonna count to 3 and that shit better be retconned when i turn around,
screams
thank you
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bluebellhairpin · 5 years ago
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Marvel Headcanons - Road Trips
A/N: I’m a horrible person. But at least my procrastination of my asks is being for-filled in a way that still sprouts content. - Nemo
Summary: The Avengers and their S/O go on a road trip. Gods? Mutants? Aliens? with them, what could go wrong? 
Masterlist  
Loki Laufeyson
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Bruh. You go on a road-trip with this guy and you’re gonna really wish you d i d n ‘ t. 
Tricks. So many tricks. This guy can’t drive a car, he has nothing to do except play tricks. Look At That Face, no remorse, no mercy. You gotta be strong af to survive a trip like this with Loki. 
bUt he does buy you all the food. And all the stuff you like. In mass amounts. (“(y/n), you said you liked this sweet packet stuff right? Ah, good. I brought five boxes so we don’t run out.” ) Like five whole boxes
So what’s it gonna be? Trickery for food? Yay or nay? Yay, definitely yay. 
Peter Parker/Spider-Man
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You will not sleep. Y’all get too hyped up of junk food and adrenaline to sleep for more then half an hour at a time so POWER NAPS ALL THE WAY THERE AND BACK
He video’s everything. He says it’s to show May and Tony when you get back but we all know the truth. Its so he can get one of those cool old-style videos of you No shame that boy has.
He lets you pick all the music, as long as it’s not AC/DC because he had an experience with Tony that involved ‘Thunderstruck’, hacking and his suits earpieces that lasted a over a week that we s h a l l n o t  s p e a k o f e v e r
But overall it’s a really cute trip. So cliche. So romantic. So amazing.
Tony Stark/Iron Man
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Loves every second because it’s with you and after everything he’s been through that is all he needs and wants.
He has playlists, cars, hotel reservations, restaurant reservations, food stops, food stashes, sights to see. All these things are ready before you even suggested getting away for a couple days. 
Turns into a sappy, flirty mess. It’s almost like the trip turned back time to when you both first met and the only problem he had was making a new missile to sell to some place in Afghanistan.
He’s just so ready for a break, low and behold please give i t t o H i m
Steve Rogers/Captain America
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Road-trips with Steve are done on the back of his motorbike and you can fight me on this. Mostly because he likes it when you wrap your arms around his torso so yeah fight me again.
Despite the trip being a road trip you both spend a lot of time at stops and motels instead of on the road. He likes taking things slow, since he hasn’t gotten to do things slowly for over four years after he woke up. He’s very grateful if you let him do this.
He lets you take lots of photo’s of him whether you’re good at it or not doesn't bother him. Even frames one you took of his silhouette because it looks that good to him. 
 Becomes addicted to cocktails after the second road trip because “they’re so colourful and come in so many flavours, (y/n) have you tried this blue one yet? Look they have one named after me-” 
Thor Odinson
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He gets so hyped and excited. 
He really loves travelling and learning about earth more like you teaching him about earth stuff so he’s so optimistic about the whole trip and that attitude rubs off on you so you end up coming home all happy too.
He brings lollies/sweets/candy with you and lemme say you are bouncing off the walls the whole damn time. One time he got so hyped on sugar he almost summoned lighting. 
You take Loki sometimes. He pretends he doesn't like it, but he does. He thought we wouldn’t notice but we did. So Loki ends up being the ‘bored’ third wheel while you and Thor stuff your faces with sour worms, chocolate, and gobstoppers.  
Bruce Banner/Hulk
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He’s gets so soft, and that makes you soft, and then you come back and your combined softness makes everyone else so very soft.
He worries about Hulk coming out and ruining the trip and the car but you constantly tell him and reassure him that it’s fine and you’ve managed to hone the ability to calm Hulk down when things get out of hand.
Needless to say he relaxes almost completely and w o w you didn’t know he sung that well.
And damn when you come back he’s like a changed man. Shyness? Almost gone. Reluctance to join conversations? Hell N a h. He almost becomes Tony 2.0 but only around you because “No one will believe you (y/n)”
Clint Barton/Hawkeye/Ronin
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Clint almost l i v e s for road trips with you. I say almost because he lives for you.
You hunt down carnivals so he can win you all the prizes. The others aren't even surprised when you come back with a carload at stuffed toys anymore.
You also stop at a number of piers and sit at the end with fish and chips and some beer and just talk. Life. The future. The past. That one slice of pizza that tasted better than any others you've ever eaten in your entire lives.
You guys just do so much stuff. And its all so wholesome and pure and s o f t. 
Peter Quill/Star Lord
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Did someone say road trip? Peter has all the tunes.
So much as touch the radio/speakers without his knowledge and you're preparing yourself to (possibly) walk home. He doesn't care if you're the other side of the country. You will walk.
He's a sucker for staying up and stargazing with you. He'll point out all the planets he's been to, and all the ones he wants to take you to later.
While Stargazing, be prepaid to have him jump up and pull you to him if a 'dancing song' comes on. That can range from the 'Livin La Vida Loca' to 'All of Me’. It's amazing. 
Scott Lang/Ant-Man
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He's a dad. He knows how to keep others and himself  entertained on long trips.
Magic tricks. Snacks. Music. Jokes. Everything and anything you can think of to pass time, he's got it ready and waiting.
Sometimes he takes Cassy with you, and honesty things become more fun (if that's at all possible). Which means, for you, more food, music from your childhood, and embarrassing stories about Scott that Cass had managed to get hold of.
Overall it’s pretty cute going on road trips with Scott, that and it’s never ever boring. 
T’Challa/Black Panther
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He’s a king, and a very busy one at that. So when you manage to pull him away from his duties he treats you extremely well. 
First he takes you to a certain county (Once it was Singapore (that was a very luxurious trip), another time Hawaii, etc), then he gets a hire car and takes you wherever else you’d like go.
Every time, every trip, he finds a Starbucks. He collects the cups and brings them back to Okoye. He does it to spite her. You know it.
He gets much more relaxed on the trips, and always comes back being able to deal with his duties much better.
Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier
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Wow okay first off, Bucky loves road trips with you. 
He manages to persuade Tony to lean him one of his fancy older cars and takes you along the coast in that. He’s a coast road trip type of guy.
He really loves the beach, the only thing that gets in his way is the sand and salty water getting in the joints of his arm, but he says he can “just take it off, don’t worry darlin’.” so yeah it’s r e a l l y not a problem. 
If he can't get a hold of one of Tony’s old cars, he gets an old pickup truck/ute and camps outside on the back with you and watches the stars and has old 30′s/40′s music playing from the radio. It’s pretty cute. Like him. 
Kurt Wagner/Nightcrawler
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Mate. This guy has no idea what he's doing. 
Once he tried to bring, like, a whole ass record player because he was worried there’d be nothing to dance along to. Seriously, Kurt, we have a ca r a d i o for that. Precious Baby Boy.
He’s also pretty young, so be prepared to have lots of contraband School food (sour lollies, chips, etc) stashed everywhere in the car. This boy will eat all the junk food he can lay his three-fingered hands on. R E S T R A I N HIM. 
He'd probably take every opportunity he can to cuddle you or take you hand in his. He’s not quite used to doing ‘normal’ stuff like this, so the fact he’s doing something like that with you means a lot. 
Doctor Stephen Strange
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He’s, um. He’s not used to this sort of thing either.
He’s been this arrogant, selfish, self-absorbed neurosurgeon for as long as he can remember. The most social and intimate thing he’s used to doing is ‘faking it’ with some random to make him look good.
BUT, sudeNly with you he kinda turns to a charismatic, sweetheart gentleman that will actually take you wherever you’d like to go. France? Okay. Brazil? Just south a little. China? Food’s great there. Russia? We’ll take ice skating lessons before we go. 
He can’t actually leave NYC for long, but he will spend as much time with you on trips away because they help him relax and it’s n i c e.
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