#broflake

[whydidisavethistomyphone]

[macmanx]

nature is amazing and mysterious

[piraticalwit]

happy birthday, @denydefeat ! ignore the quick gifs because i've about had it and i wanted to get this out before your day was over. the realization that we've been buds for almost a decade (oh my god???) sent me into my feels this morning and i finally had the time to throw a quick thing together. you, nadia, are so fucking amazing. i can count on one hand (haha) the number of people i've kept in contact with through all of these years and you are at the top of the list with hunter and milla. i can't believe it took us as long as it did to finally interact but i will never forget that first call where you were like anyone wanna get drunk and listen to me read my immortal?? a true bromance was born that day. you make me laugh every day, you share my love and nostalgia for whataburger and i can't believe a whackadoodle person almost kept the two of us apart. adulting sucks and i know neither one of us are on tumblr as often as we used to be, but i hope you know i will always be in your corner rooting you on (and waiting for you to send me cursed hook things). I can't imagine my life without you in it and I can't wait to hang out soon. we have snow until may/june sometimes so .. see you for the fourth of july i guess lmao. happy birthday my favorite broflake. you're closer to retirement age. i love you, mate !!

[geezerwench]

Broflakes

[crackerdaddy]

Bro flakes

[onenakedfarmer]

Survival of the Fittest:

Eliminate the weakest genes from the breeding pool - those that cannot adapt, those whose behavior is incompatible with or detrimental to the progress of the whole - and the species will advance and evolve.

[secondaryartifacts]

Bro: you okay?

[paulgadzikowski]

But are they afraid we don't have democracies after all ... or that we do?

he's back at it, yet another serious death threat has hit car hammer explosion man

[jesterbells]

Tumblr New Word Dictionary

I love new words. So here's a list of recently created words and idioms I have learned through tumblr (not all of these terms were invented on tumblr but that's where I learned them):

blorbo: a fictional character you're a fan of. Coined by thelustiestargonianmaid.

"I'm so hungry I could get banned from facebook": coined by babyslime in response to a Wil Wheaton post

GORIMM: Gross Older Relation I Must Marry. Source: bethanydelleman

hlep: when a disabled person asks for a specific kind of help and "they do something that is not what you ask for but is what they think you should have asked for ... Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hlep." Source: giantkillerjack's therapist.

horse fantasy: something that is theoretically possible unicorn fantasy: something that is definitely (or almost definitely) impossible. Source: bemusedlybespectacled.

zomancy: soup divination. Source: cryptotheism.

UFOs: unfinished objects--"something that is unfinished but in hibernation," as distinct from WIPs. Source: knitting community and bylambd.

autoenshittification: turning cars into digital extraction machines to steal your data and money through digital infrastructure and microchips, and the endless repair nightmare of digital car systems and cybersecurity vulnerabilities. Source: mostlysignssomeportents

nude: "when your clothes are off." naked: "when you're clothes are off when you're up to something." nakey: "when you are an animal and your collar has been removed." Source.

sideways fan: following a fandom second-hand. Source: capricorn-0mnikorn.

spoken Garamond: "the over-emphasized voice people use to read poems." Source: Frances Klein's friend.

nongry/nungry: when you're starving but also don't want to eat any of the food in your kitchen. Coined by tathrin.

scrumbling: scrolling on tumblr. Coined by the mum of anti-terf-posts.

window shipping: "any shipping done without actually watching/reading the work in question." Coined by lurker-no-more.

friend John / a Friend John answer: "when someone asks a relatively reasonable question in context and the enquiree 1) speaks at length without answering the question, and 2) implies the enquirer has injured the enquiree by even asking such a thing how could you." Coined by sileana.

bitism: a new school of media criticism which asks the simple question: is the work committed to the bit? Coined by linecoveredinjellyfish

snors d'oeuvre: having a little nap on the sofa before taking onseself to bed for main sleep. Coined by SJKSalisbury (can't find the tumblr repost now).

socratic terror: "what every athenian felt when they went down to the agora in the 5th century and saw an old man with a beard approaching them." Coined by lesbianshepard.

introvirtuous: "when you're introverted but have taken on numerous leadership and outgoing roles in your life." "I'm here to help. But I'd rather not be." "Someone around here has to get things done. and unfortunately it's going to be me." Coined by soundslikerhetorical.

grundlous: "of or pertaining to grundle." Coined by IMLIZY.

concretes: specific aspects of a character that persist across interpretations. The essential, structural essence that makes a character recognizable as the same person. Rarely physical traits; subjective. Coined by Ladylark and kayanem.

skeletonin: "the happiness chemical released when you see a ghoul or perhaps a ghost." Coined by gwentrification.

broflakes: "the weak, fragile 'alpha' males who are so easily threatened by strong women." Source: rickladd (can't find the tumblr reblog atm).

the planet of hats: "the thing where a people only have one thing going for them, like 'everyone wears a silly hat.'" Source: Star Trek fandom & TV tropes, learned via homonculus-argument.

feelings yakuza: "those who turn their personal discomfort into a social evil and try to erase the target completely." Source: Japanese fandom via マロミチャン.

Ship of Thesaurus / Rogetism: "When a student copies an essay online instead of writing it and then painstakingly changes every word to a synonym until the text no longer makes any sense." Coined by trek-tracks and Chris Sadler respectively.

Flemming's law / vibe dysphoria: "the most toxic person you've ever met over-relates to woodland creatures on social media." Coined by Chris Flemming and canadianwheatpirates.

fight with a gorilla: "any secret or invisible struggle." Coined by punksandcannonballers.

squimbus from my polls: the poll version of blorbo except for obscure fan favorite characters. Coined by yardsards.

pebbling: "the act of sending your friends & family little videos and tweets and memes you find online, like how penguins bring back pebbles to their little penguin loved ones." Source: NurseKelsey (can't find the tumblr reblog atm).

serpentineabouts: roundabouts that aren't round. Coined by paulgadzikowski.

luft: air equivalent of wet. Coined by questbedhead.

getting the good bologna: "when you experience something of better quality and then you’re doomed to no longer be satisfied." Coined by the family of kelssiel.

hypofixation: "the kind of things that you've autisticly decided you Do Not Care About." Antonym of hyperfixation. Coined by animate-mush.

[cosmictapestries]

The fact that the response to Janet Cage as a character in MK1 has been overwhelmingly positive, especially with female players(and to the horror of the broflakes game wide) is proof positive to me Sonya Blade should have been base roster for MK1 and not just a kameo. It's a hill i'm willing to die on that excluding the strongest female fighter from Earthrealm was a massive mistake. She and Cassie Cage are badly needed in MK1(and yes, I've seen the datamine that says CC will be DLC.) I would LOVE to be able to run Sonya with Janet as a kameo. Total dream team❤️

[werewolf-cuddles]

A good way to get video game recommendations is to see what games straight white broflakes are complaining is woke

At this point, the word "woke" has lost all meaning and has been reduced to yet another culture war buzzword.

I swear, 9 times out of 10, when I see someone complaining about something being "woke", it's literally just because there's a pride flag in it or one of the lead characters is black or something stupid like that.

And then, when one of these games flops for one reason or another, they'll blame it on it being "woke", and not the actual flaws in the game itself.

Like, Starfield didn't suck because you could choose your pronouns, it sucked because it was fucking boring. Concord didn't fail because of pronouns either, it failed because of its painfully outdated and uninspired mechanics, and the fact it launched at full price when most of its contemporaries are free to play.

Honesty, I can't imagine being miserable enough to waste so much time and energy obsessing about shit like this. It's just a pointless waste. I'd rather spend my time playing games I love, than complaining about games I hate.

[paulgadzikowski]

"When did comics become so woke?"

1938

[nerdby]

I get that it's an important debate, but I'm over all of this Man vs Bear debate. I'm tired of people trying to spoon-feed ignorant man child broflakes the trauma that comes with being raped and why death just might be preferable to living a life in constant fear, knowing that if it ever happens again you'll just get lectured about how you were wearing the wrong outfit and it wasn't that bad.

I'm just over that shit.

[majingojira]

Today, I am once again reminded that everyone who complains about "woke" is a weakling. A "snowflake" in their terms.

I call them "Broflakes."

Why? Because they tap out of watching things that easily "offend" them. Me? I'm much stronger than that. For three reasons.

1. I am a MiSTie. I've seen movies so bad they can peel paint. Many of the scifi and fantasy movies I watched unironically before MST3k featured them (The Giant Gila Monster, Beginning of the End, The Killer Shrews). I only tap out for long stretches of boredom (Teenage Caveman did not have enough dinosaurs in it! Thank God for Joel and the Bots!).

2. I'm a monster movie fan. Meaning I've seen a lot of both misaimed children's movies and straight up horror. You learn to stomach a lot!

3. Even being a bit leftie, I enjoy the anime "Gate" which is SUPER right wing. Often to the point of being near propaganda and nationalist at that. I could go on about it's horrors, but the point here is I powered through politics in the story o disagree with and enjoyed the guns and explosions for what they were.

So, when I see a guy say they couldn't watch something even if it has something they liked in it because of "Woke Politics", I just see a weakling and a coward admitting to that weakness in public.

Not exactly a smart thing to do.

And it takes more willpower to vent about their weakness elsewhere than to confront them about it rather than point out their weakness publicly.

I'll just vaguepost about it instead! Muhuhahahaha!

[georgewiman]

Broflakes

A famous person attended the game. She was on screen for 55 seconds out of nearly four hours. They don't like her for some reason and are whining about it.

I don't want to ever hear another syllable from that crowd about people they think are "easily offended."

[kat-eleven]

Instantly adding to my vocabulary